Human Relationships One dictionary defines relationship as the way people or groups feel about each other and behave towards each other. When two people or groups are friendly towards each other and work well together we say that they have a good relationship. Personal relationships are like sunshine, the weather or the temperature — being friendly is like warmth, and being unfriendly is like cold. Relationships are also like physical connections. A good relationship is like being joined to the other person or group, ending a relationship can be like losing a part of yourself. A lot of people believe that a broken friendship can be repaired, but only like a torn thread in which a knot will remain forever. Or maybe it’s like when a broken vase is glued back together but the cracks never go away. When people who have a romantic relationship, like in a marriage or dating situation, break up we can also say they ‘split up’. If a married couple is separated, it means they've stopped living together. If they decide to officially end the marriage, they get a divorce. People with the same values usually stick together, but there’s an old saying that opposites attract. When we make friends, we usually try to find people who have similar attitudes towards life as we do. We like to be around people who think like we do and even solve problems in a similar way. But friendship can change into love if people fall in love with each other. Some people don’t believe that a man and a woman can be true friends and that if they say they are ‘just’ friends, one of them must be suffering by suppressing his/her real feelings. Society often faces relationship problems between people of different races, religions and social classes. These negative relationships are usually based on prejudice, illiteracy, intolerance and closed-mindedness. Sometimes people are just rude because they know nothing about the other person or group of people, and are suspicious. Many societies have a certain prejudice against the disabled. In recent years, however, there has been a great improvement in people's attitudes: their ignorance has been replaced by information, their fear has disappeared and given way to understanding and their pity has been replaced by positive practical help. The most positive headway has been that most people today now see the person before the disability, while in the past they used to see the disability before the person. Some disabled people are brilliant thinkers, people like Dr. Stephen Hawkin, the scientist, researcher and author who lectures at Oxford University. He is physically helpless, totally dependent on his mother for all his daily needs and on his computerized chair for all communication and movement. Some aregreat craftsmen and artists, actors and performers, and even sportsmen, as can be seen every four years at the Paralympics Games. The relationship between men and women in society was not always like what we see in today’s modern society. The women’s movements of the past hundred years have tried to change the way women are treated by men and by society in general. Compared with the past, women today have better jobs and educational opportunities, and are paid and treated more equally. They have become equal in chore distribution at home and in the raising of children. Women still do not have equal political power, but they are becoming more influential and also have responsible jobs in business. There is still an invisible ‘glass ceiling’, however, which prevents successful women from getting the most powerful jobs in an organization. Post-reading activity 1 What's your definition of a good relationship between classmates, parents, teachers and students, and parents and their children? 2. How do relationships change as people get older? How are they different from, between boys, girls at different ages? Describe a true friendship. Support your ideas giving examples and reasons why. Do you know any disabled people? How are the disabled treated where you live? Give some examples. Aw Reading You are going to read an article about solving relationship problems. Choose the most suitable heading from the list A - I for each part 1 - 7 of the article. There are two extra headings which you do not need. Define the problem Ask for help Review the agreement B Understand each other's view D__ Search for solutions F H_ Try many solutions Agree on one solution Implement the solution Fixing relationship problems may not be easy and may take some courage. In his ‘heck Relating Skills, Professor Richard Nelson-Jones identifies a 7-step strategy for solving rela- tionship problems: A ic E — Confront the problem G I ds .. —now that you know a problem exists, talk to your friend about it calmly and ask them to choose a time and a place where they fee! comfortable so you can discuss it. De —take time to listen to each other fully, without interruption.If either one of you starts to get upset, leave the discussion until you have both calmed down - or try writing down everything you have to say and giving each other what you have written. Give yourselves a day to think about it before talking again. Maybe you both just didn’t understand how the other person saw the situation. — start by looking for and accepting what you agree about. Then look for the specie things you both do that keep the problem alive. — do not throw out any solution, even if it seems stupid or crazy. just come up with as many solutions as possible. Then, together, look at each one and talk through how each one would practically influence your relationship. .. — to agree on this, both of you must feel as though the problem has been resolved for you. A solution is not a way of letting one of you just continue behaving like before, while the other continues to feel hurt and unvalued. — keep to the agreement and do what you said you would. Tf one of you does not, point it out in a calm non-aggressive way. — if things are not working, repeat steps 1 to 6 to find out why the solution you agreed on is not working. Success doesn’t mean that all the problems are completely resolved and simply disappear. This is a process for both of you and you should both feel that it’s helpful. (Adapted from the Internet, www.bbe.co.uk ) Post-reading activity A a a 4 F What do you usually do if something goes wrong in a relationship with a good friend? What kind of relationships do you prefer - open, flattering, don’t care? Do you believe that any broken friendship can be fixed? Explain. What kind of secrets do you tell your best friend? Are you a leader in your relationships? Comment on it.For questions 22 - 31, read the text below. Use the word given in capitals at the end of each line fo form a word that fits in the space in the same line. There is an example at the beginning (0). Example: (0) mainly Homelessness is 0 .. ... a housing problem, but it is also about the breakdown of (22) .... relationships. It is the most extreme form of housing (23) in that it is a (24) . van Of access to a secure home. In (25) .... homeless people (26) . pregnant women, (27) the sick, women in danger of domestic (28) young people at risk of (29) ... homeless people live in shelters provided by (30) organizations, but more are sleeping out. The major (31) .. of practical help and support is made by charitable organizations. .-, local housing authorities try to house . those with children, people, the disabled, Many single MAIN PERSON NECESSARY FAIL BRITISH MAIN ELDER VIOLENT EXPLOIT VOLUNTEER PROVIDEWriting Write a composition (180 - 220 words) for your English class on what the perfect friendship would be. Include: what good communication is, how a good friend treats you and what a good friend is like.