How Do You Deal with Woke Women?

By: Chase Amante

Commenting on my article about deconstruction in cinema as an anti-masculine

phenomenon, reader Bee remarks:

I generally don't have issues finding women and still don't (I actually think this
site is far more useful for general psychological frames and motivations in
business, etc.) but the mentality from females is so offputting, I actually get up
from the table and in your words, the "attraction window" is just gone.

There doesn't seem to be any charming, witty, or logical way to wake these women up
to the toxic values and ideas seeping into their heads. Selfishness, entitlement,
bigotry, etc.: these are not and have never been virtues.

As anyone here knows, an emasculated man is fun to women for about 5 seconds on
their powertrip and then they despise you for being weak. It's a hell of a
conundrum these ladies put themselves in (and brought us along for the ride)
because woke women are EXTREMELY lonely, generally a good thing for having some fun
with them, but not these women and their numbers are increasing.

At this point, my only success in breaking through is to be an ungodly asshole. For

example, asking questions to the woke like: if lesbians use phallic sex toys on
each other, are they actually lesbians or just bigots? You want to see a pissed off
female? And maybe 1 in 10 (on a good day) laugh, but she's the one with a boyfriend
and isn't looking (good for her).

I'd really like some discussion on this. These women are miserable, don't know why,
and are becoming completely closed off, which is just bad on every level.

And again, I've always done reasonably well with women but this is affecting
coworker nonsexual relationships and dealing with businesses in addition to just
enjoying women's company.

The answer to “how do you deal with woke women” is actually already in another
article I wrote recently, on reacting to female rudeness and faux pas: just be
cool.

That’s easier said than done though, especially if she really knows how to
aggravate you with inane political positions and self-righteous claptrap she’s
absorbed from daft professors and loony online pundits.

So what do you do when some woman – maybe a girl you want to go out with, or maybe
just one you’re forced to interact with in a school or work setting – launches into
some officious diatribe about her pet political positions?

There Are Three Kinds of Political “Talkers”

First off, no matter what sort of politics we are talking about here, we need to
recognize there are three (3) distinct types:

Mimes. The vast majority of people political are what we can just call ‘mimes’.
They parrot talking points they pick up other places, and have some degree of
understanding of what they are saying, but it isn’t deep. They can’t explain the
underlying philosophy of their positions; they haven’t thought through all the
implications of their positions; they are just saying what they think signals them
as a smart, trendy, and with-it individual. This is most people – the vast majority
of people who talk to you about politics are mimes.

Hostiles. Then you’ve got your people who are really just angry, bitter people. The
embodiment of “misery loves company.” These people use aggressive political
positions to whip up hostile emotions in themselves and others, basically seeking
to provoke either agreement or controversy in their listeners. These people may or
may not have a deep understanding of their positions and the implications of them;
it doesn’t much matter. They are not philosophical people; they are aggressive and
hostile ones, trying to use their rants to increase their personal power in
aggressive, hostile ways.

Philosophers. Finally you have a small minority of people who will talk to you
about politics in actually thoughtful ways, the philosophers. You know someone is a
philosopher because his position is a philosophical one, not a moral/self-righteous
one. You can question his sacred cows and he will not take offense; he is
interested in a good discussion, and in getting to the bottom of life’s great
truths, not in signaling his goodness, correctness, trendiness, or righteousness
(like a mime) or in kicking up in-group unity and out-group hostility (like a
hostile). You won’t meet many philosophers, unfortunately, and when you do, you
won’t need a strategy to deal with them, so we won’t talk about them here.

Because philosophers are so rare, you can usually trust that if someone is talking
to you about politics, this person is either a mime or a hostile.

You yourself, unless you are a philosopher, and even if you are a philosopher but
find yourself talking about subjects you’re not that well-versed in and experience
some emotion around, may dip into being a mime on some topics… perhaps a hostile
when you’re feeling extra snippy.

Being aware of the distinctions is good not just for dealing with others, but for
mollifying your own baser political instincts, too.

Dealing with Mimes

First off, let’s talk about dealing with mimes.

Mimes are what you’ll run into most of the time with most people’s politics,
including most woke women:

They are just parroting talking points they picked up from somewhere, without much
deep thought or deep understanding of what they are saying. Some talking point
“sounded correct” to them, so now they are just saying it to people, so that they,
too, might “sound correct.”

The important thing to understand about mimes is that they will only engage in
miming so long as they think it is safe to do so without being made to look
foolish. The instant they feel like their miming is making them look foolish, all
but the most stubborn of mimes will immediately cut it out.

This makes mimes actually pretty easy to deal with once you understand this: mimes
just don’t want to look or feel like fools.

You don’t need a deep understanding of a mime’s politics in order to get this
person to knock off the miming. Usually just some basic common sense does the
trick. For instance:

HER: I think it is so sad POCs live under a state of systemic oppression in our
society.
YOU: So what are you going to do about it?

HER: Um, well, it’s a systemic problem. So we need to handle it systemically.

YOU: So you’re not going to do anything about it. You’re just telling me about it,
then.

HER: Well, um… I just, uh…

YOU: Did you want me to do something about it?

HER: Uh, is there something you can do?

YOU: I don’t know. You were just telling me about it so I thought maybe you had
some ideas.

HER: Umm…

YOU: Anyway, so blah blah [THREAD CUT]

This is one way I find effective for dealing with inane political parroting like
this. E.g., you get some girl telling you woke stuff, so you answer with (in
effect), “Why are you telling me this?”

You’re NOT questioning it. You’re NOT arguing with her. You’re NOT debating her
points, at all.

Instead you are just asking her WHY she is telling you this. What is the reason for
her to regale you with this? Is she going to do something about it? Does she want
YOU to do something about it? What is the purpose?

Obviously this is not some conversation topic that is personal to you and her. It’s
not about her life. It’s not about your life. It is some inane parroted talking
point she’s picked up about people she doesn’t have any relation to at all. So why
is she telling you about it?

Mimes parrot the talking points they do because they think it makes them look
intelligent and cool. When instead they feel foolish while miming, thanks to the
magic of operant conditioning, they learn to stop doing it.

woke woman with a rainbow flagShe’s miming the positions she is because she thinks
they help her socially. If they start hurting her, she will knock it off.
One note on this technique: I find it is best to act a little puzzled – you are
just wondering, why is this person telling you this? – and then once the person who
is miming to you has had a half a minute to a minute of awkwardness, you change the
topic to something interesting/fun/personal to the two of you… in effect ‘saving’
her from her own social awkwardness.

This is important for operant conditioning: she gets negative, awkward feelings
from bringing up an awkward topic, but then is relieved to return to good
conversation again once she is in a normal chat with you that is not about these
awkward mime topics.

Also, I find it is helpful to get off speculative, abstract topics by making the
conversation about ACTION: what does she plan to do, what is she asking YOU to do,
what would she LIKE the two of you to do, etc.

Not “actions other people should take” – that is always the easy out for mimes.
“Well as a society we should…” “I think we need to construct ways to make people…”
That’s a cheat. Make her tell you what SHE is going to do, and/or what she is
trying to get YOU to do. That’s the fun topic. It is a conversation between you and
her; it should be about you and her, not a bunch of random people “out there” that
she really has no ability to influence anyway.

You can have a little hint of a smile on your face as you grill her on this. To
you, it’s a game. It’s good for her to have that feeling that she’s getting played
a bit, and probably shouldn’t be talking about these overly serious topics she has
no actual control over in a seduction with an “unserious” guy like you.

You can make a game of it if you REALLY want to get into it:

HER: Our society is far too unequal. The richest three people own as much as the
bottom 50%. It’s deeply problematic.

YOU: You planning anything for it?

HER: What do you mean?

YOU: I mean, you seem pretty concerned. I thought maybe you were planning to do
something. Got like a terrorist ring to blow up the rich people or anything? Maybe
do a Fight Club car bomb in the skyscrapers thing?

HER: No, I’m not going to do anything. I just think it’s unfair.

YOU: Oh okay. I thought you were, like, gonna fight for change or something.

HER: Well, change has to happen at a society level.

YOU: So you’re not going to become a politician? Try and get into the system and
change it from the inside?

HER: I don’t really think I’d make a very good politician [laughs]. No one would
vote for me.

YOU: Aww. You’d get my vote. Mine and my whole fight club.

HER: [laughs]

See how we are just teasing her, asking her questions about what she will DO –
actually DO, HERSELF, not what she “thinks society should do” – and making it into
a fun, silly, and ultimately flirtatious conversation?

The Name of the Game Is “Don’t Take It Seriously”

She’s just some girl.

Girls are silly and cute.

It doesn’t matter what her political opinions are. She’s not going to change
anything.

You don’t need to “change her mind.” You don’t need to “show her up.” You don’t
need to “get her on your side.” How many politically radical women have ever
changed the arc of history, in all of human history? Can you name five?

Men doing this thing recently where they get all pissed off at women over those
women’s political views is men behaving like women. Women don’t influence the
political process, except where men yield to them or allow it. A MAN getting upset
at a WOMAN about her politics? It’s preposterous. Not to mention unmanly and
unattractive.

She is not taking steps to make her “political ideas” become reality. At best she
is writing her opinions on the Internet and going to political rallies. Political
rallies only work insofar as the groups they are allied with wield real, actual
power, in which case they can point to the rallies as a point of mass support. And
writing stuff on the Internet changes absolutely nothing at all – especially when
all they are writing is just parroting of the things other people were already
writing there.

Even if she were to enter politics – who controls the political system? The United
States and Western Europe are not republics anymore, they are democracies. And
democracies are controlled by the wealthy, always. Politicians go into politics,
sometimes cynically, sometimes idealistically, but they always end up either
enriching themselves doing the bidding of the wealthy, or they get run out of
politics for refusing to play ball. If she’s an idealist and she thinks she is
going into politics, that she is going to enter at the ground level, with zero real
information, and stand up against a machine of tens of millions of deeply
entrenched people who see all that she does not and know what she can’t and has an
infinite coffer of trillions of dollars at its disposal, and push her positions
that will gum up the whole machine, and all those tens of millions of people and
trillions of dollars will just stand idly by and let her do it, LOL. Not going to
happen. Radicals trying to change society are the #1 problem complex societies
adapt themselves to squash. Highly complex systems don’t “change from the inside”;
they just grow more and more stultified until they eventually implode.

Plato on tyranny arising out of democracyPlato knew it. But generations pass by,
and what was forgotten must be rediscovered again through suffering and loss.
So, if she wants to behave like an idiot, talking about huge, sweeping, systemic
changes she will never make, and has no ability to bring to fruition, don’t you
ALSO behave like an idiot, and try arguing with her, in favor of a different set of
huge, sweeping, systemic changes that you will never make, and have no ability to
bring to fruition.

Then you’re just a couple of rubes, arguing pointless politics you have no ability
to influence, doing nothing at all except pissing each other off, needlessly.

Instead, be COOL and have FUN with it.

Use it to TEASE her.

That is FUN.

Make it a fun thing, not a stupid, frustrating, infuriating thing.

Dealing with Hostiles

Of course, then you also have your hostiles.

These are your run-of-the-mill bitter people who are pissed off at the world and
want as many other people to join them in their misery as possible.

If you’re someone who finds himself in frequent heated political debates, there’s
an excellent chance YOU are a hostile… so don’t forget to turn that mirror on
yourself while you’re at it.
The thing with hostiles is that these are not people you can flirt with or have fun
with. They are allergic to cool people. They are distinctly UNCOOL people who HATE
people being cool and detached – they want everyone to be as bitter, pissed off,
ineffective, and lame as they are.

If you ask me, the best thing in the world to do with hostiles is to avoid them.

You will know someone is a hostile pretty quick if you try to make things cool, but
they just stay latched on like a pit bull and refuse to let up on keeping things
lame as can be:

HER: It’s so unjust how LGBTQA+ are stigmatized and marginalized in our society.

YOU: So what are you going to do about it?

HER: You don’t understand. This is a SYSTEMIC problem, which means the system
itself needs to change. WE need to change it.

YOU: Okay. So how are YOU going to do that?

HER: We need to start by making it illegal for heteronormative people to blah blah
blah

YOU: So are YOU going to do that? Are you going to go around arresting straight
people for straight people crimes?

HER: We need to do it as a society. Until we act as a society, we can never change.

YOU: … okay. I’ve got your opinions. Thanks. Let’s talk about something else now.

Notice how this is not a person you can get to talk about things she herself is
going to do.

She is totally uninterested in talking about herself. She doesn’t want to have a
personal conversation with you. She just wants to rant.

As soon as you identify someone is like this, continuing the conversation has zero
value.

If you can lead her off this topic, good, do it.

If not, just exit the conversation.

If it’s some situation where you can’t easily exit, you will need to tell her this:

“Look, I understand your position. Thank you for telling me. I’ve got it now, and I
don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

You don’t argue with her about her position; you don’t tell her she’s wrong.

You just tell her you understand, thank her for sharing it with you, then exit the
topic.

woke woman with dyed blue hair holding cruelty free signDo you gain anything from
debating with this woman? If so, what? Is she your equal?
But what if she’s just totally wrong about everything?

It doesn’t matter; you’re not going to change her mind.

You can behave as a social enforcer if you want to, and start arguing with her. She
is hostile, now you are hostile. You can both be hostile together.

I don’t know what that achieves for you, but if you’re an angry, bitter person, and
she’s an angry, bitter person, I suppose the two of you can just go be angry,
bitter people arguing about pointless large, systemic things that neither of you
has the ability to change together. A couple of idiots arguing amongst each other.

If, however, you are not an idiot, then content yourself with allowing her to be
the only idiot in the room – and tell her you understand her opinions, thank her
for sharing them with you, then get off the topic (or exit the conversation
altogether if she just won’t shut up about it).

Woke Women: They’re Mostly Mimes

Yes, there are those bitter, hostile types out there. They are a minority of a
minority.

It is sad for them. Their lives suck, so they’ve clung to politics as a bludgeon to
try to give their lives meaning. Of course, they in fact have no control over the
things they are arguing about, and can’t/won’t do anything to change these things
they feel so impassioned about, so really they are just making their lives suck
even further, concerning themselves with issues they can do nothing about.

It's pointless and pathetic.

Unless you, too, would like to maximize the pointless tragedy of your life, you are
going to need to be able to avoid getting sucked into “spirals of stupidity” like
this.

The simple way to do that:

Be cool.

With girls who are miming, you can tease them a little bit, asking them about how
they, themselves, specifically, are going to tackle these big, sweeping issues they
are talking about. When they can’t answer that, you can ask them if there was
something they wanted YOU to do. When they can’t answer that, well, then you have
just thoroughly made them feel a little silly for talking so much to you as a man
about something that neither they nor you can affect, and you can lead the
conversation toward more man-and-woman conversation again.

You’re asking, effectively, “Why are you telling me about this?”

Why, indeed?

Of course, she can’t tell you the actual reason: “I just want to seem moral,
knowledgeable, and correct, so I’m miming talking points that I think make me sound
that way.” So instead she just feels a little silly, looks a bit foolish, and cuts
all that out.

When you encounter woke women who are hostile, on the other hand, the thing to do
there is to (as soon as you’ve realized she’s hostile) tell her you understand her
opinions, thank her for sharing them with you, then move the conversation on or
exit it.

By the way – telling someone you understand her opinions, then thanking her for
sharing them, WITHOUT sharing opinions of your own, is a subtle snub… just in case
you didn’t realize it.

What she really was after was some kind of acknowledgment that she affected you.
She wanted you to:

Be wowed and amazed at her astute political acumen, OR

Grow curious and inquisitive at her remarkable sagacity, OR

Reveal your true color as an enemy of the revolution by trying to “fight back”

But you did none of that. You simply told her you understood her – understood,
without being floored OR inquisitive – then thanked her for sharing her opinion…
something that you normally would not thank for if it hadn’t changed your thoughts.
So the thanking comes across slightly insincere, as though you are just trying to
shut her up – which you are. She can’t debate you, though, because you haven’t
shown any indication you are an “enemy”… only that you are unmoved by her diatribe,
and wish her for her to shut it.

When you deal with political rants this way, you chasten the other party, without
being an ass about it or getting yourself drawn into some pointless argument about
things neither of you can control or ever will influence.

It’s an effective way to get woke women off their soapboxes:

Tease them if they’re mimes, and adroitly shut them down or exit the conversation
if they’re hostiles.

No need for YOU to get all worked up and sucked into a political debate with a
woman. Women have limited ability to affect politics; any individual woman you
“debate” with has none at all; and you must always keep in mind the ‘rule of
fools’:

“Who’s the bigger fool: the fool, or the one who argues with him?”

Don’t argue with fools.

Tease them and show them how silly it is, the stuff they’re getting all hot and
bothered over, instead. Then lead the conversation to a more personal, productive,
and enjoyable set of topics.

Be seductive, not stupid.

man and woman clinking wine glassesMake it about a man and a woman, not stupid
politics.
Be cool.

Chase