(WN) Buaisou - Volume 02

Chapter 01: School Attendance
Illustration Notes:
(LN) Shiori Hanasaki -> (WN) Shiori Fujisaki. Possible

mistranslation of Fan Translator.
***
"Ow!"
There was a ripping sound.
There was a resounding sound as she ripped it off my face.

I felt a strong pain, so I pressed my hand on the spot. Sayaka
gave me a troublesome look in response to my reaction.
"You're so noisy."
In her hand, there is a bandage that has been removed.

It's the one that was on my face.
The school uniformed Sayaka reached for another

bandage that had been placed elsewhere. I desperately tried
to escape, but her hand was faster. There was a tearing
sound again.
"Oww ow... You're relentless, you know that?"
"It hurts more when you peel it off slowly, doesn't it?"
The living room of the house. I and Saika were sitting on

the sofa. My wound was already almost healed. The small
wounds are almost closed, and the only part that remains is
the relatively serious one. I still have the plasters on my face,
『fb.com/JNovelCodex』
but the number of plasters has been gradually decreasing,
and now there are only three.
Well, it's crazy to think that three plasters are so few.
The last one was pulled off with great force. She wrapped
up the three pieces properly and placed them on the table.
"Okay."
"You don't have to put them up here anymore, do you?"
I took out my phone and looked at my face.
The swelling around my eyes had already subsided. For a

while, it hurt just to open or close my eyes, but I didn't feel
anything anymore. The bruises that used to be all over my
face were nowhere to be seen. There are still small scars, but
they are not visible from a distance.
It was embarrassing to go to school with a bandage on my

face.
"Not yet. It's definitely better, but it's not perfect."
"It's fine already."
"No, it's not. On the battlefield, this might not bother you
as much though."
...It had already been almost a month since I was injured.
It was the middle of November. Because of the chilly

weather, I've had to turn on the heat lately. Just two months
ago, it was so hot, but now the temperature has dropped like
a lie. If I had jumped into the river at this time of the year, I
would have probably caught a cold.
In that sense, I was glad it was not that cold then.
I haven't had any problems since then. I don't have to deal

with those delinquents anymore. Since I gave them what
they wanted and threatened them, they seemed to have
stopped trying to get involved with me. As long as I got what
I needed out of them, the injury would be a small price to
pay.
The morning sun was shining through the window. The

window was closed, but I could feel the cold air wafting
through it.
My father, who was eating his breakfast at the dining

table, turned to me.
"Hey. The tamagoyaki in the meal is too salty today."
As usual, you are complaining a lot. I thought. I

answered as Sayaka put a bandage on me.
"It's fine once in a while."
"Eehh, I like sweet omelets. Salty ones are just wrong..."
"Shut up. If you say too much, I won't make you breakfast
anymore."
"Hmmm."
I think both have their merits. My father, who is a picky

eater, may not understand this.
"By the way, do you have this salty omelet in my lunch as

well?"
"Of course."
"You're ruining my fun..."
"You're persistent. You should be grateful that I'm making

your lunch. It's a lot of work to get up early in the morning
and prepare for them. Do you want to try it yourself?"
"Please forgive me!"
He turned around in a panic and started eating.
I and Sayaka looked at each other. We both seem to be

thinking the same thing. I wish my father would be more
serious.
It was the same when my mom was still alive. She took
care of my father, who was sloppy to the max. He had no
sense of clothing and often wore layers of clothes at random,
so she even had to choose which clothes to wear. Because the
workplace allowed casual clothes, my father's poor taste
would show itself.
"Shitty brother. I'm done."
Sayaka closed the first aid kit.
It had become a routine to change the bandage in the

morning. For some reason, she felt a sense of duty to do it,
and she always made sure to take care of it.
"Thank you, Sayaka."
Sayaka silently stood up and put them away in the

cabinet. She then slung her bag over her shoulder and
started to leave the living room.
"I'm leaving now."
Just before she left, she turned her face to me and said so.
Soon, I heard the sound of the door being closed. The

time was already 7:20. I don't have that much time to spare,
since the school start time is 8:10.
I grabbed my bag. I called out to my father.
"I'll go now, too. Just put away the dishes as usual."
My father raised his left arm high in the air and waved it.
I left the living room and put on my shoes at the front

door. Sayaka seemed to have put on her usual loafers, which
were the only thing missing from the entrance.
I went outside.
It was a beautiful day. According to the weather forecast,

it was going to be sunny all day today. Not a cloud in the sky.
I get pumped up to do my best today as well.
***
When I entered the classroom, Saito was already in his

seat. This was unusual for him since he was usually just
about late.
When I greeted him good morning, he replied with a

'good morning'. For some reason, he was reading a book.
The book cover was on, so I couldn't really tell what he was
reading.
"What are you reading?"
Saito looked up at me. He glanced at me and showed me
the contents.
I was shocked.
"It's early in the morning... Why are you doing that?"
What I could see were a few illustrations that looked like

they were adult material. He was probably reading an erotic
novel. I thought it was a serious book because he looked so
serious, but I was being an idiot. But from the corner of my
eye, it didn't look like he was reading an erotic novel at all.
"No, this is... just amazing."
His eyes were serious as if he was watching the super play

of a top athlete. I was dumbfounded.
"Huh...?"
"It's really great. It's just amazing."
He was passionate about it, but it only made my heart

grow colder and colder. It was like a junior high school
student just learning about sex.
"Have you been into it lately?"
Saito nodded broadly.
"I didn't know this world existed. It's different from the
manga. I think I've opened a new door..."
"...Good for you."
"I brought some other books, you can read them too."
"No, thanks."
It's already known that I'm an otaku, but as expected, I'm
hesitant to read erotic novels. Or rather, how would it look
to read an erotic novel in public, regardless of whether
you're an otaku or not?
Thanks to the end of the midterm test, my sense of

tension has disappeared. All the explanations for the test are
over, and it's just class as usual these days.
I sat down and took out a notebook and a problem book

from my bag.
"Oi Oi. Did you turn down my invitation to study? Just

how much do you like studying?"
"Does it matter? Just leave me alone."
I'm going to take the entrance exam next year. Even if I do

some preparation now, it won't be too soon.
I've already covered most of the material in my classes at

school in preparation for the exam. It's just a matter of how
much you can improve your proficiency. To be accepted at
Tohashi University, you have to stand out from the rest of
the students.
I smoothly solved the problems. Gradually, the number of

people in the classroom increased and it became noisier.
I realized that there were only five minutes left until the
start of school. The students who had been practicing in the
morning came into the classroom.
I noticed that Shindo, Fujisaki, and Nishikawa were also

in the classroom. I looked at the back of my row.
At Enami-san's seat. There was still no one there.
I turned my head back to the front.
After all, she hadn't been late once since then. Her
attitude in class is quite normal. When the teacher points at
her, she responds honestly, and she doesn't argue with him
anymore.
Human habituation is a terrifying thing, and I was no

longer surprised by such a scene. Just as I used to take it for
granted that Enami-san was not there in the morning, I now
take it for granted that she is there in the morning.
...But today, she's unusually late.
I thought about that but quickly dismissed the thought.
Why should I care about Enami-san?
I resumed my studies.
After solving one problem, I looked up again. There was

still no sign of Enami-san's arrival. I looked at the clock on
the blackboard and saw that there were only two minutes
left.
What are you doing... I thought irritably. I wondered if

she was really getting serious.
The second hand of the clock spins relentlessly.
Ten seconds, twenty seconds, thirty seconds... With less

than a minute left, the time for morning SHR (Short Home
Room) was slowly approaching.
The homeroom teacher, Shiroyama-sensei, always enters

the classroom at exactly 8:10. So there wasn't much time to
spare. The rest of the students seemed to have started
returning to their classrooms, and I could no longer hear any
noise in the hallway.
Just then, I heard the sound of footsteps coming from the

hallway.
"......"
I turned my head in the direction of the footsteps.
The footsteps were getting closer and closer. I could tell

that they were in a hurry. Then, the footsteps stopped in
front of the classroom and quickly turned into the sound of
the door opening.
—Gara!
There was a female student there. She was breathing a

little hard, which was unusual.
I guess she made it in time. I was a little relieved.
It was Enami-san standing at the entrance. Not a perfect

figure. Her hair is a little disheveled.
At about the same time, the bell rang
Enami-san exhaled heavily. She begins to walk as if

nothing had happened.
She crossed the podium from one end to the other and
stopped in front of my desk.
"Good morning."
A greeting. I returned the greeting honestly.
"Ah. Good morning."

After hearing those words, Enami-san went to her seat.
The teacher soon came into the classroom.
The teacher looked at Enami-san in the back of the

classroom and nodded in satisfaction. He stood in front of
the teacher's desk and put down the attendance sheet.
"Stand up! Salutations!"
The order from the day duty person was given. And the
usual morning began again.
***
"Ookusu-kun."
It was at the end of the third-period class. Fujisaki came

to my seat.
"What's wrong?"
For some reason, Fujisaki's eyes were swimming. She took

a deep breath as if she had made up her mind, then
slammed her hands on my desk.
"So, have you decided yet?"
"Eh?"
I had no idea what she was talking about.
"Look. you and I competed against each other, and the

winner will get to command the other freely..."
"Oh."
I forgot about that. I guess the point is, have I decided

what I'm going to order her?
"To be honest, I hadn't thought about it at all, because I've
been too injured lately. Now that I'm finally fully healed, it's
time for me to start thinking about it..."
Fujisaki has been restless for a while now. I think she's

trepidatious about what kind of orders she's going to receive.
However, I don't have any intention to ask for something
outrageous.
"On the contrary, what kind of order was Fujisaki

planning to give me?"
"Huh? No, I didn't think of anything like that!"
She was clearly flustered. After all, she seemed to have a

purpose.
"I doubt it."
"Don't worry about me. I don't want to wait around for

you, so I want you to decide quickly."
I feel uncomfortable that she's rushing things even though

she was in a position to be ordered. Normally, she would aim
to just drop the subject and fade away without bringing it up
herself.
"Right. I'll decide by tomorrow. Is that okay?"
"Yeah..."
The trouble is, I don't have anything in particular that I

want Fujisaki to do. But if I don't give the right orders,
Fujisaki will be unhappy.
"Or is there something you want me to order you to do?"
"I-I don't."
When she gets flustered, it shows in her attitude. It was

cute.
"...The two guys in the back are kind of quiet today."
Fujisaki looked behind me as if she wanted to divert the

conversation.
Naturally, she must be talking about Saito and Shindo.

I've been watching them since a while ago, but they've been
absorbed in their books. They probably didn't hear our
conversation.
"I never imagined Saito-kun or Shindo-kun would read

books."
"Please don't mind them...."
I can't really say that the book they're reading is an erotic

novel.
"I like books myself, though. I read a lot of mysteries."
"I like the Kindaichi series myself. It can be a little

gruesome, but the writing is easy to read and the characters
are interesting."
"Oh, I read it too!"
Inu-O-ke is famous for the scene where a person is

sinking upside down into a lake and has a horrifying image.
In fact, there are some grotesque scenes, but more than that,
the character of the killer is very appealing. It cannot be said
that he is a bad guy, but rather he is a very sympathetic
character.
"I wonder what it is that those two are reading. Their eyes
are so bloodshot."
"They're panting and putting their faces as close to the

book as much as they can, so you'd better stay away from
them."
—It must have been around the end of the first period.
Shindo was interested in the book Saito was reading and
borrowed an erotic novel from him.
"I didn't know that Ookusu-kun read books too. I've never
seen you reading at school."
"Sometimes. My father also likes mystery novels, and he

often recommends them to me. I probably don't read as
much as Fujisaki."
"That's right. I have a lot of them, so if you want one, just

let me know."
"Thank you."
While I was saying this, the two people behind me were

reading away, giggling. Even if you don't know what kind of
book it is, it looks pretty creepy.
"......Are your injuries okay now?"
I nodded. I've caused Fujisaki a lot of worries.
I remember on the first day of the test, Fujisaki got teary-

eyed when she saw me in shambles. That's how painful it
must have been.
"It was awful, wasn't it? I can't believe someone would do

that to an unresisting person."
"Well, you know. I guess it was just bad luck."
"That's just awful..."
Of course, I didn't report it to the police. My first priority

was to stay away from them, so I refrained from doing
anything that might cause even the slightest resentment.
"It's all over now."
In the end, I let things happen as they did, and I was

naturally frustrated. However, my feelings were not the
priority.
"You're very kind, Fujisaki."
"No, no, nothing like that"
Her face was a little red. It seems that she is not good at
being praised face to face.
"The fourth-period class is about to start, so I'm going

now!"
Fujisaki then hurried back to her seat.
I looked at my watch and saw that there were only about

30 seconds left.
I looked again at the two people behind me. Their stances

hadn't changed at all, as if they hadn't moved at all since
before. I wondered how much they were concentrating on
their reading.
Just then, the chime rang out, announcing the start of the
next class.
I was curious to see what they were going to do, so I
looked around. They were holding their books with one
hand, and with the other hand, they went through their bags
and pulled out their textbooks. They put the open textbook
in front of the book and tucked it in between. Then
proceeded to read it as if nothing had happened.
Are they idiots or what?
***
After school, I headed for the club room.
When I entered the first laboratory, the club president

was already there. For some reason, he was naked on top. I
could see his untrained, slender back.
"What are you doing, President?"
At the sound of my voice, he turned around. His chest hair

was thick. I don't think it's something I want to see too
much.
"Ookusu? No, I was just trying out the dry rubbing

technique."
(Note: Kanpu masatsu is a Japanese custom where one

rubs a dry towel along the body to create warmth and
friction.)
Looking closely, I noticed a towel in his hand. It was a

towel with a character's picture on it, apparently obtained at
a Comiket.
"Why Dry rubbing?"
"I heard it's good for your health. I'm taking an exam this
year, you know. I don't want to ruin my health, so I've been
trying out different ways to stay healthy."
"If you're worried about your exams, shouldn't you just

retire from club activities?"
"You're so right, it's boring."
Even though he has so much chest hair, the hair on the

front of his head is so thin that it makes me sad. It's a pace
that makes me think that he'll probably lose almost all his
hair before 30.
"Do you want to try it, Ookusu? It's not bad."
"No thanks. I don't want to. If you have time to do that,

please study."
I sat down on the chair in front of the lab table, away from
the president.
The president's mouth was agape in frustration. However,

despite his displeasure, his grades are very good. He has
been ranked first in his senior year of high school. I guess he
has always been good at what he does. He has been able to
get into Tohashi University while maintaining his amazing
game skills.
I guess that's what you call a genius...
I turned on my portable game console and started up the

software to memorize English words as usual.
And that's when I realized that Saito and his friends

hadn't arrived yet. I left them behind because they were still
reading erotic novels after all the classes were over. Maybe
they'll be too engrossed in their erotic novels to come to the
club activities today.
"Ookusu. There aren't many here today."
I heard the president's voice and looked around.
Indeed, there were only a few people. It's not just Saito
and Shindo. Only about half of the usual number of people
were here. I wondered why there were so few people, even
though nothing had happened today.
"Do you know something, President?"
But the director shook his head. If he didn't know

anything about it, then it must be nothing. It was just a
coincidence that there were not many people there.
"Okay, then, shall we play Mar-kart?
"No."
"Not possible again?"
Unfortunately, the day would never come when I would

be able to play a game with the president. It's because I
refuse to do so. It's not a matter of "not yet". I will never do
it.
"Isn't it fine? I don't have much time before graduation,

and since I'm going to be absent for most of the third
semester, this is the only chance you'll have to play games
with me."
"Shut up. Please go away so I can concentrate."
"Sad..."
He trudged back to the front. I wondered if he was cold
because he was still half-naked.
I looked around the first laboratory again.
It was quieter than usual. At this time of the day, there are
always groups of people, and it's always noisy. But now, I see
people playing solo.
I notice one of them, a first-year student, is wearing a

mask on his mouth. He's coughing every now and then. He
didn't seem to be in very good shape.
I wondered if a cold had started to spread. In my class,

there were no absentees yet, but I didn't know what was
going on in the other classes.
Thinking that I should be careful, I looked down at the

screen of my portable game console.
***
When it was about 5:00 pm, I turned off the game

console.
The number of people in the first laboratory had

decreased even more. It seemed that the first-year student
who had been wearing a mask had already left.
It was starting to get dark outside the window. The

sunsets are really early these days.
The president hadn't left yet. To my surprise, he had been

rubbing dry cloth all day. He was still naked on top.
"I wouldn't care if you caught a cold."
I left the first laboratory with only a warning.
I left the school building and headed for the main gate. I
saw the usual figure next to the main gate.
It was Enami-san. For some reason, only today,

Nishikawa was also with her.
"You're late." Enami-san said.
She seemed to be in a slightly bad mood. Of course, she

wouldn't have waited here all the time after school right?
When I looked at my phone, I noticed that I had received a
message on my line.
Risa Enami: I need to talk to you, so let me know when

you're done with club activities.
I rushed to apologize.
"I'm sorry. I didn't notice it at all..."
"It's okay, I was not waiting that long after all."
I'm glad I left early. If I had left it any longer, I don't know
what she might have said to me.
"I'm sorry, Naocchi, it was so sudden. So, are you okay

with the time?"
I nodded.
"If it doesn't take too long. I'm already done with the
shopping, so as long as we don't go past 6 pm, I think I'll be
fine."
"It won't be that late. Then let's go."
As they started walking, I followed them.
"So what's the story? I mean, where are we going?"
But both only gave vague answers to my questions.
"I'll tell you later~"
Like Enami-san, Nishikawa is also surprisingly forceful. I

walked down the hill, freezing in the cold.
***
We arrived at a cafe in front of the station. It was a private

store, not a chain.
There was an empty round table made of mahogany. The

three of us sat down at the table. Jazz music was playing in
the restaurant. I don't know what it's called.
"We don't come here very often, do we?"
"At least, it's my first time."

I looked at the menu and ordered a blended coffee.
Enami-san and Nishikawa ordered cappuccinos.
"The atmosphere is not bad."
Enami-san seemed to like it. After a few minutes, the

drinks we ordered were brought to our table. After taking a
sip, I said,
"So, why don't you tell me what you need from me?"
The restaurant was quiet, probably because many

customers came alone. Some customers came in in groups of
several and had conversations, but no one was making a
loud noise.
Enami-san and Nishikawa looked at each other.
"So, Naocchi. You can cook, right?"
It was an unexpected turn of events. I thought she was

going to talk about her studies.
"I cook every day. Not sure whether I'm good or not, I'm
at least decent at it."
"And you can do all the housework, right?"
"I also clean and do laundry every day, why does that
matter?"
I couldn't understand where she was going from earlier. It

also bothered me that Enami-san didn't seem to open her
mouth much. She was frequently bringing the cup to her
mouth.
Nishikawa looked at Enami-san's face.
"...All right."
After placing the cup on the saucer, Enami-san looked up.

She was unusually stagnant in her speech. She moved only
her eyes to the left and right.
"I need a favor."
I was surprised. I had never imagined that the day would

come when I would be asked a favor by Enami-san. But what
would it be about? I can't imagine.
Enami-san's face was serious. Her cheeks scrunched up.
"Just for a week. Can you clean my house and cook for
me?"
...I think I heard her wrong.
"Sorry, can you repeat that. I didn't quite hear you."
"Like I said, can you clean my place and cook for me?"
The repetition did not change the content. My hands were

shaking. I poured coffee down my throat to calm down, but
it didn't help my agitation at all.
"Home? You're not talking about Enami-san's house, are

you?"
"Yes I am."
"You're not asking me to come into your house and clean

and cook for you, are you?"
"That's what I've been saying. You're not getting it."
It's not that I don't understand the meaning of Enami-
san's words. It's just that my brain is refusing to understand.
It's just too sudden and I'm confused.
"Have you ever been to Risa-chan's house, Naocchi?"

Nishikawa asked.
I shook my head. There's no way I have. I don't even know

where it is.
"You know." Nishikawa said after a sigh.
"Risa-chan's house is quite dirty, to say the least. It's not a

dump, but it's so messy that there's nowhere to put your
feet. Dust is flying around when you move just a little bit,
and the areas of water are covered with mold. We want to
clean it all at once, but we don't have the manpower."
"Eh? It's that dirty? Isn't it dangerous? I think you should

hire a contractor."
But Nishikawa waved her hand to the side, saying, "That's

a No!"
"It's expensive to hire a contractor. And there are other

factors, so we don't want to do that. That's why me, Naocchi,
and Risa-chan should work really hard to clean it."
"I don't get it..."
I don't know why I have to help, or why they suddenly feel

the need to clean.
"As expected, it's troublesome right? I'm sorry." Enami-

san said.
She looked unusually dejected. By the way, she was late
this morning. I wondered if it was related to that.
"Is it true that you don't want to hire a contractor because

it's expensive?"
"......"
When I say it's expensive, it doesn't mean it costs

hundreds of thousands of yen. I don't know Enami-san's
family situation. But even if she is in that much trouble, I
don't think it's an amount of money she can't afford.
So that was what stuck out to me the most. Why would

she want to go to the trouble of using all of us to do the
cleaning?
Enami-san closed her eyes at my words. She didn't open

her mouth. The cappuccino on the table was already half
gone.
"I shouldn't have hidden it. I stand corrected."
She twirled the spoon in the cup.
"You're right, it's not because we don't have money that

we don't hire a contractor. We're not that poor. It's just that
I simply don't like having people in my house."
"I'm a person too, you know."
I wonder if it was a silly attempt at humor. Enami-san's

brow wrinkled.
"That's not the point. Contractors are just people you pay.
They are just strangers. I just don't want to let someone I
don't trust into my house."
Does this mean that she thinks me and Nishikawa are
worthy of her trust? I didn't think she trusted me that much,
let alone Nishikawa.
"Why do you hate it so much?"
Maybe I shouldn't ask. But if I went to the house, I would

find out the reason why she didn't want me to come home.
Enami-san seemed to understand this. She looked very

uncomfortable.
"—I don't want people to see my mother."
The voice was small and uncharacteristic of Enami-san.

Nishikawa seemed to already know what was going on and
did not change her expression.
Enami-san continued to spin the spoon, making a dry

sound as it hit the cup. There was a sense of unease in the
air. She must be in some kind of trouble.
"My mother is not in a good state of mind right now. I

don't want to bring anyone into the house, because if people
see her, they might start strange rumors. But as expected,
it's become difficult to leave the house unattended, so I'm
asking you to do this."
"......I see."
Probably not even half of the situation of Enami-san's

family has been conveyed to me. But I finally understood
what she was asking me to do.
"But I still don't understand why you want me to clean

and cook for you. Why all of a sudden?"
"That's..."
Brushing back her hair and looking diagonally forward,

Enami-san looked oddly picturesque.
Once again, I was reminded of how beautiful she really is.

The ordinary gestures and behavior of normal people seem
to be glittering when it comes to her.
"Have you heard about the recent cold epidemic?"
"Oh, yeah."
Sure enough, there was a guy in the club room who looked
ill. Nishikawa put down her cup and leaned forward.
"It's terrible, in the first year! I think a few dozen people

were already absent. There hasn't been a wave in our class
yet, but it might just be a matter of time."
"I didn't know."
I hadn't thought that colds had been prevalent during the

year because Sayaka was so out of sorts.
"Now, my mother has a cold, too... But her room is dirty

and she can't cook, so I don't feel like I can take care of her
properly. I want to clean her room and cook for her so that
she can sleep calmly and recover."
"So that's how it is."
It reminded me of a conversation I had with Enami-san

about "important people".
The fact that she is now thinking of doing such a thing

may be due to Enami-san's change of heart. If that's the
case, there's no way I can say no to her.
Besides...
I touched the scar on my face.
I could relate to wanting to do something for our mothers.

It was something I couldn't do anymore, and I envied her for
it.
"Fine."
That's why I said immediately.
"But I'm not sure how much help I can be, since I don't
know the condition of Enami-san's house."
"That's okay. Thank you."
Enami-san's cheeks relaxed a little. Most men would be

won over by that look.
"Okay! Now that we've decided on Naocchi's

participation, let's make a plan! First, we need to do some
shopping! Let's go to Home Depot and buy what we need for
cleaning!"
Enami-san nodded at Nishikawa's words.
"I've got about 20,000 yen in my budget. Anyway, I have a

lot of things to throw away, so I want to buy a lot of garbage
bags. Also, to clean the water area, I need to buy some
things."
"I guess so. I'll think it over tomorrow. Is that okay with
you, Naocchi?"
"Yeah."
For now, I'll take a break from the club activities starting
tomorrow. The club president might miss me, but it's only
temporary help.
However, when it will end depends on how dirty the

Enami house is. If it's too bad, we may not be able to finish
in a week. On the other hand, if it's nothing serious, it could
be done in a day.
That's when I noticed that Nishikawa was smiling at me.
"What's wrong?"
I asked her, and she answered with a smirk.
"No, I just thought that Naocchi and Risa-chan have

become really close. Until now, not many people talked to
Risa-chan."
"Nishikawa, shut up."
"That's great! From a parental standpoint, I'm happy for

you. It's great to know that Risa-chan can talk to boys now!"
"Don't take it upon yourself to be a guardian."
It was probably the first time Nishikawa had seen me and

Enami-san talking properly. But for me, it was also the first
time I had ever heard Nishikawa and Enami-san talk
properly.
I could sense that they were really close.
"Risa-chan may have this personality, but she's a good girl

at heart. Please don't give up on her."
I deliberately crossed my arms in a pompous manner.
"I guess I have no choice."
"What?"
The face in front of me stiffened.
"That was a little cocky. You are getting carried away."
"No, Nishikawa's right. You should learn to make more

friends before you say that."
"Hmm."
Enami-san's eyes narrowed. I looked away.
Then Nishikawa started laughing. For some reason, she

was holding her stomach.
"It's rare to see Risa-chan open up so much! It's been a

long time since I've seen you having fun, Risa-chan."
"Having fun?"
Enami-san glared at Nishikawa as if she could not

overlook what was told.
"I mean, you're talking more than usual."
"That's normal."
"But you're not normal, Risa-chan."
She dropped more bombshells at Enami-san, who looked

unconvinced.
"Aren't you two going to start dating soon?"
Me and Enami-san's eyes met.
Then together, the two of us said, ""That's not going to

happen."" And snorted.
I think it's absolutely impossible. If I went out with

someone as difficult as Enami-san, I would get tired. I think
Fujisaki is more adorable.
"I doubt it."
After that, Nishikawa didn't mention anything else about

our relationship.
After a brief conversation, we left the store just before 6

pm.
***
The next day.
"Fujisaki."
Fujisaki, who was talking to a girl behind her, turned

around at the sound of my voice. She stopped chatting and
turned her body towards me while playing with her bangs.
"Ookusu-kun, what's up?"
"It's simple. I've decided what to do about the agreement."
The first-period class hadn't even started yet, but I

thought I'd better say it quickly.
"Oh, that's quick. Thanks."
"You don't have to thank me. I am the one who has to ask
you to do something."
The girl who was talking to Fujisaki asked, "What? What
are you talking about?" in surprise.
We briefly explained what had happened. The girl smiled

a little.
"Shiori. Good luck."
After saying that, she left her seat and went away. I guess
she thought she was interrupting us. After confirming that
she had left the classroom, Fujisaki asked me with a nervous
look on her face.
"So, what did you decide to order me to do?"
"Oh, that's you see."
I told her what I was thinking.
"I want Fujisaki to watch over Sayaka's study."
"Eh?"
Fujisaki was puzzled, perhaps because she didn't expect it.
***
I remembered what happened yesterday. I left Enami-san

and Nishikawa and went home, rushing to cook, do the
laundry and take a bath. After finishing everything, I lay
down on the sofa, exhausted.
"Shitty brother."
That's when I heard Sayaka talking to me. In Sayaka's

hand was a reference book. She was studying for her final
exam even though it was a month away. I was a little
impressed. I sat up.
"What's wrong?"
"There's something I don't understand."
Then, she pointed at the instructions in the reference

book. I took the reference book from her hand and read the
part that was indicated. I see. It may indeed be difficult.
I taught her, but she didn't understand right away. I had

no choice but to go into her room and watch her study with
her. It seemed that her studies had become more difficult
lately and she couldn't keep up.
This might be bad. When I thought of that, I suddenly

remembered Fujisaki's words.
If only I could get her to tutor Sayaka.
That's what I thought.
***
"If it seems impossible, you can turn me down. It seems

like Sayaka has been having trouble with her studies lately.
She doesn't want to get too much of a bad grade because
she's also a person who cares about what others think."
"That's how it is. Your sister..."
Fujisaki and Sayaka must not have known each other. The
request was heavy, and I was prepared to be rejected.
However, Fujisaki immediately nodded.
"Okay."
I was baffled. She had said that I could order her to do

anything I wanted, but I hadn't really expected her to accept.
"Are you sure you want to do this? It might take up a lot of

Fujisaki's time, though."
Fujisaki is a member of the badminton club. There must

have been club activities about four times a week. It will take
up valuable time on days when she doesn't have club
activities or on her days off. Normally, I would have to think
about paying to hire one.
"It's okay. When I don't have club activities, I don't have

much to do. I only go to karaoke with my friends once in a
while. If it's for Ookusu-kun that's no problem."
"Thank you."
However, I can't ask her to take care of Sayaka's studies

forever. Fujisaki has her own studies. It can't get in the way
of that.
"For now, it would be great if you could look after her for
a week or two. Beyond that is fine."
"Yes, I understand. When do you want me to start

teaching?"
"I don't care when. The sooner, the better."
"...I can start today. I don't have any club activities today."
"Oh. Really?"
If that's the case, I'll have to get Fujisaki and Sayaka
together right away. I pulled out my phone and opened up
the line. Then I sent a message to Sayaka.
It was immediately read and I received a reply. It seems

that she was just looking at her phone.
Sayaka Ookusu: OK.
I put my phone back in my pocket.
"What's wrong?" Fujisaki asked me.
"Better hurry up. Are you free at lunchtime today? The

three of us should have lunch together, including Sayaka. It's
a face-to-face meeting."
I can't imagine what they will really think of each other.

Sayaka is ostensibly a nice girl, but in reality, she is quite an
otaku. It will be interesting to see if she and the serious
Fujisaki are on the same wavelength.
"So that's how it is. I have no problem with it."
"Roger."
I took out my phone again. For now, we decided to meet

in front of a vending machine near the cafeteria. We were
free to eat whatever we wanted in the cafeteria.
"I'll see you later."
I walked away. As I sat down and waited for my first-
period class to start, my phone shuddered again.
Sayaka Ookusu: So, what kind of person is it, that

person.?
Sayaka is surprisingly shy in some ways. I guess she's

nervous about meeting someone for the first time.
Naoya Ookusu : It is a kind senior named Fujisaki. I

think you'll like this senpai.
I've never seen Fujisaki being disliked by others. In that

sense, I can rest assured.
Sayaka Ookusu: This person agreed to go with me after

all. I wouldn't like it if he tries to pick me up.
Naoya Ookusu: Don't worry about that. It is a girl.
Then, she sent me a stamp with eyeballs popping out. I

wonder if it's that surprising.
***
It was lunchtime, and Fujisaki and I headed for the

cafeteria.
The classrooms for the lower class were downstairs.

Sayaka was the first to arrive. When she saw Fujisaki, her
eyes widened for a moment and she immediately greeted
her.
"My brother is always indebted to you. I am his sister,
Sayaka."
At that moment, Fujisaki's mouth froze.
"Cu—"
Cu?
"—Cute!!"
Fujisaki pinched Sayaka's cheek with her hand. She was

excited and her eyes were shining.
I looked at her again. She plays friendly at school. She

wears make-up and has her hair done to the point where the
teacher doesn't pay attention to it. She doesn't look like she's
usually sitting in front of her computer with a suspicious
smile on her face.
"Ookusu-Kun's little sister is such a cute girl... amazing."
Finally, Fujisaki released Sayaka.
"Nothing like that. I'm not as cute as Fujisaki-san."
"That's not true! Sayaka-chan is really, really cute."
"Thank you very much..."
Sayaka was unusually embarrassed. She has good looks,

but she is not a person who has many friends. She is the type
of person who only opens up to those who are really close to
her. I'm sure she's not used to being praised.
"Er, What is your relationship with my brother?"
She looked at me and Fujisaki as if she couldn't believe it.

"We are class representatives together."
"I see... but is it okay? Watching over my studies..."
It seems as if Sayaka has already let her guard down.

Perhaps she has realized how good of a person Fujisaki is.
"Of course. Ah, we can't stay here forever, so let's go

quickly."
Sayaka nodded.
We stepped into the cafeteria and sat down at an empty

seat in the corner. Sayaka and I had brought our own
lunches, so we put them on the table. Fujisaki seemed to
have bought some bread.
"Is it that Ookusu-kun is making your lunch too?"
"Ah."
I pointed at my lunch box and Sayaka's lunch box

alternately.
"It doesn't take much time to make one or two.
"Oh, that's right. It's the same inside."
I'm embarrassed if people see too much. They'll know I'm

lazy.
Today's lunch consisted of sausage, boiled spinach, and

German potatoes. It was all leftovers from last night's
dinner.
"I always put vegetables in her lunch because she's a picky

eater. She never leaves anything behind. So as long as I put
them in, she basically eats them."
"Don't say things like that in public, okay?"
"My bad."
I shouldn't have said all the bad things about Sayaka in

front of someone she has never met before. Sayaka looked at
me sharply, then shifted her gaze to Fujisaki.
"Fujisaki-san, are you okay with your time? Are you okay
with using your time for me?"
"About helping with your study? I'm fine. I have time after
the club activities are over."
Fujisaki was surprisingly enthusiastic. Maybe she liked to

teach people like this.
"Do you ever help Sayaka-chan study, Ookusu-kun?"
"Well, sometimes."
Like yesterday, I will teach her if she asks me. But I've
never actively tried to teach her myself. I have a lot of things
to do, so I haven't been able to take care of her that much.
I'm very sorry about that.
"My brother is always so busy at home. Besides, I used to

be able to manage on my own, but lately, that's not the
case..."
Fujisaki nodded her head, seemingly sympathizing with

her words.
"That's right. It's true, I feel like my studies suddenly

became more difficult since then. In mathematics, we went
into the difficult content of differential and integral
calculus."
"By the way, Fujisaki-san's grade is..."
I answered for her.
"Last time, she was second. In short, she's the second

smartest after me."
"Thanks for the casual boast. I'd be very grateful if

someone like that could teach me."
"How are your grades right now, Sayaka-chan? If you

don't want to say, it's fine."
It was probably because the two people in front of her

were the first and second place in their grade. In a very quiet
voice, she answered that she was about average. I'll follow
up on that.
"She's a smart girl. She doesn't care about top grades, so

she's just making do with that kind of score. She has the
potential to go higher if she really puts her mind to it."
"It's embarrassing. stop it, really."
"...Sorry."
I guess I wasn't very good at following through. I kept my

mouth shut.
I don't have many opportunities to talk with Sayaka at

school, so I don't know how to treat her.
She picked up some spinach with her chopsticks in

silence.
"I heard from my brother that you're going to watch my
studies from today. Is that okay?"
"Yes, I also wanted to talk to you about it. Where should

we do it?"
"Let's see... If we go with a safe place, maybe the library."
The library at our school has a study room, but it's just a
place for self-study, so you might not be able to speak much.
When I said that, Sayaka nodded honestly, saying that I
might be right.
"Why don't you go to a family restaurant... or do it at our

place?"
"Eh!"
Fujisaki was the one who reacted to my words. For some

reason, Sayaka bowed her head.
"...I'm sorry about my brother. I'm going to give a stern

talking-to later about this massive ulterior motive
statement."
Then, Fujisaki looked flustered.
"I don't mind. I don't mind going to Ookusu-kun's house.

I think it's only one stop away from my house... But if it
bothers you, we can go to a family restaurant."
"...Family restaurant, please."
After thinking about it, it's not a good idea to do it at

home. Sayaka's room is pretty much full of her hobbies.
"Then let's do that. Can you tell me your line?"
"Yes."
From there, the conversation went without a hitch. I

looked at my lunch box and noticed that my chopsticks were
not moving at all. I rushed to eat some rice.
***
Time slipped away. The lunch break was over, the classes
were over, and it was after school.
I had already received a message from Enami-san and the

company on my Line. It seems they will start today as
promised. The plan was to go shopping and check on the
situation at Enami-san's house. I decided to meet them in
front of the main gate, so I tried to leave the classroom
immediately.
That's when I was approached by Fujisaki.
"I'll take care of Sayaka-chan. Leave it to me."
I stopped and turned around.
"I have no idea how it will turn out until I try it today, but
since you asked, I'll do my best."
Fujisaki seemed to be very motivated. During the lunch

break, the two of them had started to get to know each other
a little better. I said,
"If it gets too hard, you can always stop. But thank you so
much."
"Are you in a bit of a hurry, by any chance?"
She saw that I was trying to end the conversation early. I
wasn't in a particular hurry, but I felt bad about making
Enami-san and the other wait too long.
"No, not at all. Let me thank you next time."
"Eh? No, no. It's fine.. "
"No, that won't make me feel any better. I think Sayaka is

probably very grateful to Fujisaki."
"Yeah, I guess. But you don't have to force yourself. I like

teaching people."
Fujisaki is always kind to me. That's why she sometimes

spoils me too much. I feel again that I have to control myself
somewhere.
"Then, See you tomorrow."
I left the classroom.
However, even I've been taking on too many requests

from people. If I hadn't listened to Enami-san's request, I
would have had more time to watch Sayaka's study. Still, I'm
choosing to act for Enami-san's sake.
"—I don't want anyone to see my mother."
"My mother is not in a proper state of mind right now."
Enami-san's words came back to my mind. Then, I

remembered the meaningful line that the teacher had once
said, "There are many things in Enami-san's family." Those
things were stuck in my mind.
I don't know. Maybe it's not a big deal.
But it seemed to me that they were connected to the
reason why Enami-san had become unserious, and why she
had often come late.
So it wasn't just a simple act of goodwill.
I was curious to get a glimpse of what was going on

behind the circumstances of Enami-san.
Nishikawa and Enami-san were already waiting for me in

front of the main gate. After checking each other's presence,
we walked towards the home center. The home center is in
the opposite direction from where we were leaving.
"I'm sorry about all this. It's going to take a lot of time, so
you can turn me down even now."
On the way there, Enami-san said something like that.

She looked apologetic, but to me, it didn't seem to be the
only reason.
I wondered if she was now wondering if it was okay to let

me and Nishikawa into her home.
"Maybe it will be more troublesome than you imagined.

You can always stop."
Nishikawa and I are wondering how we should respond.

This was a look that we would not normally have. This is
probably Enami-san's weakness.
It was Nishikawa who opened his mouth first.
"It's okay~ I'm used to that kind of thing."
Then Nishikawa smiled mischievously.
"I have a very troublesome girl close to me, you see. So
compared to her, I can tolerate most things~"
Immediately, she seemed to realize what I meant. Enami-

san's eyebrows shot up.
"Nishikawa. Are you talking about me?"
"No, no. I'm just saying I'm extremely attentive and I'm
not a troublesome person either you see"
"Hmm."
Seemingly feeling silly for getting confused, Enami-san

moves forward. I feel like she's going faster than usual.
"Enami-san, don't go that way, go right."
We were approaching a crossroad. If we went straight, we

would only come to a residential area. Enami-san said.
"Cheeky."
And corrected her course. I could kind of tell that she was
nervous.
***
After buying everything we needed at the home center, we

went outside the store.
The temperature was completely different inside and

outside the store. It's cold, I thought as I tightened the collar
of my coat.
"Did Risa-chan's place have a heater?"
I was surprised by Nishikawa's words. I wondered if that
place is weird enough to be doubtful about a heater.
Enami-san replied nonchalantly.
"There is, indeed. It's old, so it doesn't work very well."
I was relieved. I didn't want to clean in a place where I

could feel the cold so directly.
"But, since it doesn't work very well, I understand it's so

easy to catch a cold and so hard to get rid of it as well."
I asked further.
"Do you have a stove or a kotatsu?"
"No."
Apparently, I shouldn't expect too much. I decided to

bring something to wear over my dress the next time I went
to Enami-san's house.
Before I knew it, We were about to pass by the school

again. Apparently, Enami-san's house was about a fifteen-
minute walk from the main gate.
Since it hadn't been that long since the end of the school
day, there were still many people there. I felt as if the other
students were watching me. The sight of me walking with
Enami-san and Nishikawa carrying a shopping bag would be
quite conspicuous.
—I tried not to worry too much about it.
I walk in silence, looking only ahead.
Enami-san and Nishikawa, who are walking ahead of me,
don't seem to be bothered by the stares, and they don't seem
to have any different attitudes than before.
Maybe they'll start rumors again. When I think about it,

I think I should have told Fujisaki and Sayaka about my
situation.
However, considering Enami-san's situation, it's not

something I should tell people about. I walked past the main
gate, wondering what I should do.
—At that moment, I didn't notice.
Just then, Sayaka and Fujisaki were walking out of the

school building side by side. They had been talking for a bit
after school. So just as we were coming back from the Home
center, they were on their way to a family restaurant.
And that's when the two of them spotted us.
And also that they were so surprised that they were

exclaiming.
Fujisaki's face turned a little pale.
I hadn't noticed it at all.
Chapter 02: Triangular Relationship
Enami-san's house was a room in a six-story apartment

building.
The exterior was quite ordinary. The color scheme was

based on beige. There is a parking lot around the apartment,
with about 20 cars parked there. There is also a bicycle
parking lot near it.
The building is located in a residential area, and there are

similar apartments nearby.
We entered the building through the entrance.
The door was not locked automatically, and it seemed that

non-residents could come and go as they pleased. The
building was so old that it looked like it was at least 30 years
old. The mailbox was dirty and the automatic door was slow
to respond. There was an elevator, but it didn't seem to stop
on every floor.
And it seemed that Enami-san lived on the fifth floor.

Since the elevator only stopped on even-numbered floors,
we went to the sixth floor and then took the stairs down to
the fifth floor.
There are about six houses in a row on one floor. The

Enami family was in the middle of them.
As far as the door was concerned, there was nothing

strange about it. There was no accumulation of things in the
doorway.
"It's more normal than I expected."

It's old-looking, but it doesn't look terrible. In some cases,
mailboxes are in shambles, or dead insects are left in the
hallways of apartments.
Here, cleanliness is kept to a minimum.
"This apartment is not so bad, there are not so many

strange residents."
Enami-san replied as she took the key out of her bag. The
apartment seems to be properly occupied, and people are
living on both sides.
"Anyway, come on in."
Enami-san unlocked the door. When she opened the door,

a nondescript entrance was revealed.
There were only a few shoes. All of them were women's,

and about half of them were high-heeled shoes. There was a
bit of dust, but nothing too dirty.
What about the father?
I swallowed again the question that had almost reached

my throat. I thought it would be better not to ask too much.
The bracelet on Enami-san's hand was still in place.
"Pardon... my intrusion..."
I tried saying something, but there was no reply.

Nishikawa said in a small voice as she took off her shoes.
"This is the second time I've been to Risa-chan's house."
As expected, she had been here once before. Nishikawa's
expression was the same as always.
"Doesn't look like things have changed that much since

my last visit."
"How can it change so rapidly? Wasn't it only about three

months ago?" Enami-san replied.
"Yes, but..."
The hallway was narrow. I took off my shoes and stood in

the corridor that stretched from the entrance, but it didn't
seem possible for people to stand side by side. The hallway
led from the front door to what appeared to be the living
room. I could see a door with frosted glass in the back.
There didn't seem to be too many rooms. I looked around

and said,
"It doesn't look like a place that needs cleaning. So far."
I had imagined a much worse scene. I had heard that she

couldn't get over her cold and couldn't cook properly, so I
expected to see garbage all over the place.
Enami-san did not look me in the eye.
"This place..."
Apparently, something is going on. When I looked at

Nishikawa, she was smiling a little.
All three of us were carrying bags that we had bought at

Home Depot. To put them down, we went into Enami-san's
room instead of the living room. We opened the door at the
side of the hallway and found a small room of about six
tatami mats.
It was a bleak room. There was only a study desk, a small

bookshelf, and a hanger rack. It didn't have much of a sense
of life. There was a futon folded up in the corner.
"You can just put it there."
"Okay."
I put my student bag and the stuff I bought at Home

Center down on the floor.
This room doesn't look like the kind of place that needs
cleaning either. So, I guess the living room is the dirty one.
This house is probably 1LK or 1LDK, and that's all that's left.
"Is the family still not here?"
I asked what I had been wondering earlier. Since there

was no response to Enami-san's return, I naturally assumed
that no one was home.
But she shook her head.
"My mother is here. She's been holed up in the living

room."
"Eh? No way."
There was no noise at all from the living room. If that was
the case, she might be asleep. I wonder if she doesn't usually
talk much.
"....It's a good thing she's so quiet today."
I am not sure, but it seems that there are times when she
is noisier. I wonder what kind of direction Enami-san means
by "mentally unwell" state.
"What's her cold like?"
"She has a fever of about 37 degrees Celsius all the time.

We went to see a doctor once, but he said it was just a cold."
"Do you think she's sleeping?"
"Who knows..."
Somehow, I felt a distance between Enami-san and her

mother. She was trying to take care of her, so it wasn't like
she didn't care. But they didn't seem to be on good terms.
"Is the living room where we need to clean?"
I looked at the living room through the open door. The

lights didn't seem to be on.
Enami-san nodded.
"Yes. The living room is nothing compared to this place."
I was right. So it must have been Enami-san's mother who

made the house dirty.
If Enami-san's mother was there, what would she think

of our presence? That's what I was worried about. If she
hadn't noticed that we were in the house, it would mean that
we had suddenly appeared. I was worried that we might
scare her.
The door to the living room felt thicker than usual.
"I've never actually been in there before..." Nishikawa
said.
"Risa-chan told me not to go in there. But at that time, I

could definitely feel the presence of someone."
Now, there is no sign of anyone beyond the living room.

There was no noise. There was no movement of light.
To be honest, it was eerie. Shadows were falling on

Enami-san's face. I wondered if this was an area that I
should be involved in.
However, I had already bought what I needed for

cleaning. There was no way I could turn back now.
"I'm sure she's in there. As I said at the beginning, if you

think it's impossible, you can stop. I'll handle this on my
own."
"Hmm..."
Of course, once I took on the job, I intended to finish it.

I'm sure there's a reason why she advised us to that extent.
We left Enami-san's room, crossed the hallway, and stood

in front of the living room door.
A strange smell wafted up to my nose.
I hadn't noticed it before. There was a strange smell

wafting through the slightest of gaps.
"What's that smell...?"
Enami-san didn't answer.
"I'll open it."
Then the door to the living room was opened.
The first thing that struck me was that the strange smell
had become even stronger. Earlier, I had wanted to cover my
nose, but now the smell was so strong that I wanted to stop
breathing.
Next, over Enami-san's back, I could see the entire living

room.
Through the window on the other side, I could see the

blue sky and a small balcony.
Then I was immensely surprised by the scene in front of

it.
If I had to use an analogy, it would be after a typhoon.

Exposed to wind and rain, the orderly arrangement of things
is destroyed and overturned. A table is usually supported by
four legs. But there it was, with two of its legs broken off,
sinking into the sofa as if it were leaning against it.
The whole room was a mess. It looked as if a small

typhoon had formed in the room, rampaged through it, and
then left it without repair.
It was probably about 12 tatami mats in size. There was a

dining room and a kitchen, and it seemed to have been a
beautiful space, to begin with. The floor was softwood
flooring, and the ceiling was quite high. However, from what
I can see now, it doesn't look like a place where people could
live.
The lace curtains hanging from the curtain rail were torn
to shreds. It was torn wide open in the middle, and the
bottom part was hanging down by a small joint. I don't know
why, but there were even traces of blood.
There was a large pile of garbage between the kitchen and

the dining table. A few flies were swarming around. Perhaps,
the strange smell was caused by a large amount of garbage. I
dreaded to think how long it had been left there.
Where is Enami-san's mother?
As I looked around, I couldn't tell where she was. All that

was there was inorganic matter scattered in disorder.
"That's more than I imagined."
Nishikawa pinched her nose and narrowed her eyes.
It was not impossible, but it was not something that could

be done in a day. Because we had to clean the water area as
well, I felt that it would be a tremendous amount of hard
work.
"Do you ever enter this room, Enami-san?"
"...Basically, I don't go in."
I guessed that would be the case. Enami-san must be

staying in her room all the time while she is at home.
"But sometimes I go in to make sure my mother is still

alive. As soon as I'm sure she's alive, I leave."
"Oh, I see..."
I walked forward, enduring the strange smell.
It's hard to walk properly. The carpet is littered with
shards of dishes. Not just one or two, but many. The soles of
my feet ached from time to time.
I could hear the slight hum of the air conditioner. The

slightly warm breeze hit my skin.
I look at the garbage bags piled up on the dining table.

Tissue paper, mechanical products, books, etc., were visible
in them. There was even a garbage bag where a bowl of rice
had been thrown away.
Anyway, they seemed to be stuffed with all kinds of

things. There were also food scraps, which must have gone
bad. The closer I got, the more shock I felt in my nose.
I wonder what brought about this situation?
In reality, typhoons do not occur inside houses. It was

artificially destroyed. I've heard of cases where a room is
ruined due to inactivity. However, I had never seen a case
like this one, where all kinds of furniture were impacted and
made a mess.
Anyway, I had to get rid of all the garbage in here.
That's when I thought to myself.
On the other side of the dining table. I heard a noise

coming from a gap in the wall door, about a meter away.
Is anyone there?
"......Aa."
A small voice. It sounded like a moan. It was clearly a

woman's voice.
But the pile of garbage bags made it hard to tell who was
there. I swallowed my spit and walked around the table to
look at the other side.
There, I saw a middle-aged woman with disheveled hair.
She seemed to have just woken up and I could see her

rubbing her eyes as she sat up halfway.
I recognized her right away. It was Enami-san's mother.
She definitely seemed to have a fever. Her face was

flushed, and her eyes were vacant.
She looked younger than I had imagined. She was a

middle-aged woman, but she was still very pretty. To be
honest, I had imagined her to be much dirtier. Her body was
thin and her hair was long.
For some reason, there was a futon laid out in this

secluded place. She seemed to be sleeping on the futon.
I couldn't say another word.
Then, the person in front of me exclaimed, "Ah."
"—Risa's friend? What's wrong?"
"Eh?"
"You are friends, right?"
Enami-san's mother showed no sign of agitation. I

nodded my head fearfully. Soon Enami-san and Nishikawa
came up behind me.
"Oh, there is another... Welcome..."
She said to Nishikawa behind me. It was probably the first
time she had met Nishikawa. Her tone was soft. The lowered
corners of her eyes were filled with no more emotion than
words.
This person is Enami-san's mother...
I was bewildered.
At first glance, the conversation seemed normal. But all I

could feel was discomfort.
This was because this place was dominated by a stench

and a lot of garbage. A complete stranger is looking at that
kind of scene in her own house. Despite this, she felt no
embarrassment or discomfort at all.
And that's not all. I wondered why she was sleeping in this
place.
She looked unconcerned. It was no different from sleeping

in a clean space, with a futon laid out.
The fact that she didn't feel abnormal in this abnormal

space was abnormal.
"Mom, there's a reason why I brought them here."
Enami-san stepped in front of me. She crouched down

and spoke slowly.
"We're going to clean this room now. Because it's been

neglected for too long. I've called the two of them to help
me."
Mother Enami's reaction to these words was also dull. She

only replied calmly, "Oh."
"It's nice to meet you, I'm Nishikawa. I've been getting
along well with Risa-chan."
Nishikawa bowed her head. I followed suit.
"I'm Ookusu. Nice to meet you. I'm a classmate of Enami-

san...'s daughter."
"Oh, so polite."
Enami-san's mother made a small bow. It was eerie. I'm

not sure how she can be so nonchalant. I wondered if it was
because her nose had gotten used to it.
"I'm sorry, Mom. Can I ask you to leave this room for
now? I want to get rid of everything. It's the worst place to
get over a cold in the first place."
"Really? I don't feel the need to leave..."
Mother Enami's once calm expression stiffened slightly.

She had a smile plastered on her face, but I felt that the
smile did not express any emotion.
"Mom... Do you see this room?"
Then, Enami-san turned around.
A pile of garbage. Broken furniture. It was hardly a place

where one would expect to live.
However, Mother Enami was still as relaxed as ever.
"It's normal. What's wrong with that?"
Enami-san's eyes swam as if she was having a hard time

saying it. I think she's scared. Then, as if she had made up
her mind, she looked straight at her mother.
"This room is not a place for people to live, so I want to

make sure it is. Please understand."
She said clearly. I was curious about Enami-san's

mother's reaction, so I looked at her face.
"......"
She was silent. There is no change in the expression

before and after being told. You might even think that she
didn't hear you.
A gentle smile continued to appear on her face. It was as if

time had stopped. She didn't move her head, she didn't
move her body, she was just looking back at Enami-san.
It was frightening.
Seeing her reaction, I sensed that something bad was

going to happen.
I guess my intuition was right. Enami-san was blatantly

impatient. She immediately said,
"All right. You can forget about what I said earlier. Just
don't bother us."
"Fu fu... I won't do anything like that."
And soon Enami-san's mother's time began to move. I

patted myself on the chest.
I wondered what had happened at that moment. I'm

pretty sure we stepped on a landmine. I don't know why, but
she seems to have an unusual obsession with being in this
living room.
Enami-san quietly walked out of the living room.

Nishikawa and I followed her, looking at each other.
We walked out into the hallway and closed the living room
door.
Enami-san was standing there, holding her head in one

hand.
"Things are like that..."
"I see."
I had no right to say anything. But I could understand

part of the reason why she was described as mentally unwell.
"Risa-chan, are you okay?"
"I'm fine. I'm used to it."
I guess they don't usually have many conversations. She

looked tired, even though she said she was used to it.
"For now, let's decide on a plan. First, we have to deal

with that huge amount of garbage." I said so.
It's no use thinking about Enami-san's mother now.

There's nothing we can do about it. Something must have
happened to her. It must have been the result of that.
There's a history in the Enami family that I can't even
imagine.
"Let's start by taking the trash from the living room to the
front door! If we don't want people to see too much of the
house, we need to be able to hand it over right away."
I was grateful for Nishikawa's cheerfulness on this

occasion.
***
The only thing we could do today was to collect the items

that were already bagged up. There were too many to leave
at the dump, so we had a contractor come to the front of the
apartment, sorted them to the minimum, and handed them
over.
That alone was hard work. After all, there was so much
stuff that it covered the entire living room. I spent a lot of
time just going to and from the apartment.
I arrived home around 6:00pm, exhausted.
I took a shower first since I had been touching the garbage

all day. Then I started to prepare dinner.
When I finished dinner and was washing the dishes,

Sayaka spoke to me.
"——Shitty brother."
I thought her voice was lower than usual.
I turned off the water and looked at her face.
"What's wrong?"
Today, it seems that she had been watched over her

studies for about two hours. The time she got home was
almost the same as mine.
"I've asked you before, but is shitty brother dating that
beautiful girl?"
"What?"
I couldn't understand what she was saying. I've already

told her that it's impossible. When I said that, Sayaka's face
turned sullen.
"Oh, so you're not dating huh. You go home together

sometimes, but you're not dating."
"That's right."
"I heard that that beautiful girl doesn't talk to other

people at all, but she talks to shitty brother a lot. And yet
you're not dating her."
"......"
"Today, for some reason, it seems like you were shopping

together, but still, you guys aren't dating."
"...Wait, how do you know about that?"
I'm sure I hadn't told Sayaka or anyone yet. But I quickly

remembered.
I crossed in front of the school on my way to Enami-san's

house after leaving the home center. What if they had seen
that scene?
"Were you watching...?"
"Yes, I was."
I broke out in a cold sweat inside. I hadn't thought of that
possibility at all.
Of course, I had no bad conscience. But what would they

think when they saw me?
I had left my sister in someone else's care, while I was

taking care of another girl. And yet, I didn't tell them about
it. It's a bad impression, no matter how you look at it.
"...Hey, were you the only one then?"
Sayaka shook her head.
"Of course not. Fujisaki-san was with me."
It was the worst. I prioritized my business with Enami-

san and forced Fujisaki to take care of my sister. I'm sure I
made her feel uncomfortable.
Maybe the rumor would have gotten out, and Fujisaki

would have heard about it anyway. I regret that I should
have said something sooner. It was too insincere.
"Sorry..."
It was natural for Sayaka to be angry.
"I'll ask again. Are you going out with that beautiful girl?"
"No."
I told her that I was only doing her a favor. I told her that
I had originally planned to finish it in a week or so and that I
was going to watch Sayaka's study afterward, so as not to
make it sound like an excuse.
Whether or not she would be convinced was another
matter.
"I want to ask my shitty brother something, okay?"
Her quizzical gaze was still piercing me.
"What is the relationship between Fujisaki-san and my

shitty brother?"
"That is..."
The reason why I have trouble answering is that I haven't

sorted it out properly in my mind. I heard the sound of water
dripping into the sink.
"My closest female friend..."
That was the answer I came up with. None of the other

words that came to mind rang true. Sayaka looked up at me,
irritably rubbing her arms.
"Fujisaki-san is cute, kind, and a really nice person. I

could tell that she was really looking out for my shitty
brother. To betray someone like that is the worst."
"Yes. But it's not like I betrayed her..."
"Shut up."
I couldn't say anything. I could tell that she was very upset
about it.
"Today, Fujisaki-san helped me with my studies and I

came to really like her. Even though my understanding was
slow, she was kind to me without making a face of
displeasure. Even though she should have been angry at my
shitty brother, she said, 'Ookusu-kun has his own situations'
What a good person she is."
"...Oh, so she wasn't mad at me."
"Don't get carried away."
"Yes."
"Here's another question. What should my shitty brother

do tomorrow?"
Even I, as expected, understood what Sayaka was trying to

say. I answered immediately.
"I'll apologize to Fujisaki first thing tomorrow and explain

the situation again."
"Good."
It's no excuse to say that you didn't expect to be seen. I

have no choice but to sincerely apologize.
She might say that she doesn't care about it, because it's
Fujisaki. But I shouldn't take her word for it. I think I should
apologize in some way.
"By the way, what are the circumstances?"
Sayaka's question was enough to stop me from thinking.
It reminded me of something I saw today. I met Enami-

san's mother. I saw a terribly dirty room. I felt like I saw a
part of what Enami-san was carrying.
That is not something I can share with anyone.
I must not even say anything that might give off even a
hint.
Otherwise, there would be no reason for Enami-san to

trust me.
"I'm sorry, but it's a very private matter and I can't tell
you."
That's all I could do. That's all I can talk about.
"Really."
Sayaka's face turned sullen again.
"Well, shitty brother. Good luck tomorrow."
"Aa..."
I apologized in my heart as I watched Sayaka's back as she

left. I felt like I should watch over her studies. But since I
took on the job, I also wanted to fulfill my responsibility.
I turned on the tap and let the water run. I scrubbed the
dishes with a sponge.
The temperature of the water on my hands felt colder

than usual.
***
The next day, I immediately apologized to Fujisaki. It was

almost the same as what I told Sayaka yesterday. As
expected, she didn't get particularly angry. She smiled at me
and said that she didn't mind.
However, despite her words, her favorability level might
have dropped significantly. I've never seen Fujisaki get
angry. Maybe she just doesn't show it.
"It's Ookusu-kun we're talking about. There has to be

some reason after all."
As if to dispel my doubts, she said with concern.
"So there's no need to apologize. In fact, if you apologize

so much, I'll start to wonder if you're really doing something
wrong."
It was bad enough that I hadn't told her, but I hadn't

actually done anything wrong. I had accepted Enami-san's
request before I decided to watch Sayaka's study. Fujisaki
herself had also asked me to order her to do something. So I
asked Fujisaki to do it.
"Thank you, Fujisaki. I owe you an apology, at least."
"Eh? It's fine I said..."
"No, it's just that I don't feel right about it. Besides,
Sayaka liked Fujisaki too, you know."
It was rare for the shy Sayaka to like someone in a day.

That's how good Fujisaki's personality is.
"Sayaka-chan was a good girl. I liked her too. I'm an only

child, so I envy you for having a sister like that."
"It's probably because she's with Fujisaki. She's cold

towards me."
Fujisaki smiled at me, perhaps remembering the time we

had lunch together. I don't think Sayaka hates me, but she
doesn't respect me very much.
"But I think she's just spoiled by Ookusu-kun. We talked

about Ookusu-kun at the diner, and she was really worried
about you."
"Worried?"
I couldn't believe my ears. Yesterday, all that came out of

her mouth was complaining.
"Yeah. I think it's because Sayaka-chan doesn't know

much about Enami-san. She thinks that you're being tricked
by that beautiful woman, or that she's forcing you to buy
something."
"Seriously..."
Did it look like I was paying some kind of tribute to

Sayaka? Nishikawa was also a flamboyant gal to the casual
observer. The sight of a male student carrying a heavy load,
sandwiched between two conspicuous people, might indeed
have given her that impression.
"When we were walking, she kept glancing at Ookusu-

kun, calling you 'that idiot' and 'useless brother'. It was as if
her heart was not in it."
"......"
I didn't think that Sayaka was worried about me. Now I

understood a little bit why she seemed so unhappy
yesterday.
"Sayaka-chan is a very nice girl, right?"
She said while smiling at me. I could only reply, "Yeah".
"Don't worry about her studies. Sayaka-chan is a smart
girl, so I'm sure she'll figure it out soon. Ah, but I have club
activities today, so I might be late."
The idea that popped into my head at that moment was

very outlandish. But I wanted to thank her in some way, to
apologize, and that's what made me open my mouth.
"Do you want to come to our house?"
I was voicing out again what was dismissed by Sayaka

yesterday. I've never invited a girl to my house before. I've
never even thought about it. But now, I have simply said so.
"Eh?"
"I'll treat you to a meal if you'll watch Sayaka's study after

club activities. I'll do my best to make something good for
you, Fujisaki."
"......"
Fujisaki's eyes had gone all wide. She just went silent.
And I held my head in my mind.
What am I saying? It's too sudden. I've just been warned

by Sayaka that I seem to have ulterior motives while saying
that.
I tried to cover it up as a joke, but before I could, Fujisaki

asked,
"Is it okay?"
When asked if it was okay, I had no choice but to say yes.

Then Fujisaki's expression changed to one of happiness.
"Well, well. I'll go to your house after the club activities..."
"Oh, okay."
"But I don't know where your house is..."
"Then, let's meet at 6:00 pm. in front of the station..."
"Uh-huh."
I tried to have a normal conversation, but I couldn't hide

my agitation. I had never imagined that things would turn
out this way. Even though I said it myself, I was freaking out.
"I'll let Sayaka know about it. She might not want to go
into her room, so she can study in the living room if that's
the case..."
"Will your parents be okay? They might not like me

coming in suddenly."
"Don't worry about that. There's only one deadbeat dad."
He's my father, so I'm sure he won't refuse. In fact, I think

he would probably act annoyingly about me bringing a girl
along.
"Okay, well, I'll see you after school. Contact me on the

line if anything."
"Yeah."
I left Fujisaki's seat.
I had to work hard to make it. I'm sorry Enami-san, but

I'm going to have to call it a day early. I'll do the minimum
amount of shopping and change my clothes so I don't stink
before going to pick her up.
Behind my seat, Saito and Shindo were still engrossed in

erotic novels. But they seemed to have noticed something
strange about me. Saito called out to me.
"What's wrong? You look a little spaced out."
I replied in a whisper, "It's nothing."
***
After school, I went outside the main gate with Enami and
company, just like yesterday.
The temperature seemed to be dropping further. Every

time the wind blew, the temperature was taken away from
the nape of my neck. I should have worn a scarf.
That feeling didn't change after I entered Enami-san's

house. Mother Enami seems to be indifferent to the cold.
The heating was not on at all, even though she must have a
chill from her cold.
Enami-san immediately turned on the heat, but it seemed

to take a long time to warm up.
"Risa-chan, warm me up."
"Hey, Nishikawa. You're in my way."
"That's fine!"
Nishikawa hugged Enami while raising her voice in a

subdued manner. Both girls are cute, so it's a feast for the
eyes. Although Enami-san does not like the tone of her
voice, she does not try to pull away, so I guess she does not
really dislike it.
I took out my jacket from my bag and wrapped myself in

it. I had brought it with me from my own house to reflect on
yesterday.
"Naochi, that's not fair!"
"Sorry, but it's Nishikawa's fault for not being prepared.

You knew it would be cold."
I pulled the zipper up to the top and it was much better.
I looked around the room.
Yesterday, we threw away a lot of trash, so things are a

little cleaner. The pile of stuff on the dining table was gone,
so I had a better view. I could see Mother Enami sleeping
right there on the edge of the table.
However, the room was still not clean.
First, the furniture. It was in shambles. It's not something

that can be used. At the very least, I would have to get rid of
everything that was broken. In addition, there is a lot of
small trash scattered on the floor. Not all of it is bagged.
Plus, the kitchen sink. From a cursory glance, mold was

growing there. Rotten food scraps were also left unattended.
I haven't seen any cockroaches yet, but I think they might be
coming out. Or rather, they will come out.
"We'll just have to keep at it steadily..."
I decided to move the furniture out of the living room. The

table in front of the TV had a broken leg and was useless by
any stretch of the imagination. The cut surface is sharp and
extended like a thorn, so it seems dangerous to leave it there.
"Can I just move this table off? I don't think I can carry it
by myself, so I need your help."
"...Then we can carry it while mom is sleeping."
Enami-san was paying attention to the back of the room.

Her mother must not be aware of our presence because I
could hear her breathing in her sleep from earlier.
Why did she have to say, 'while she is sleeping '?
I wondered, but there was no point in worrying about

that. Enami-san seemed to be holding the other side of the
table, so we breathed together and lifted it up. I asked
Nishikawa to open the door to the living room and carried it
to the front door.
"Thank you."
"It's times like this when you need a man's help. Don't
worry about it."
"Are you trying to be cool...?"
"No, no, I'm just saying what I thought normally."
"fu fu, I see."
It's been a while since I've seen such a genuine smile from
Enami-san. She seemed to be tense lately because she had
asked me for favors and invited me to her house. I wonder if
that means she's loosened up a bit.
"You look weak for a guy. You don't usually exercise
much, do you? You looked like you were struggling earlier."
"I don't exercise... but I don't remember it being that

heavy either."
In the past, I used to work out more. At least, when I was

with Yamazaki, I used to do strength training every day. I
knew that if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to win fights.
Now, though, I don't do it at all.
"If we don't clean up quickly, I won't be able to cook the

food you asked me to. You can make use of me as you like,
let's try to organize today."
"That's right. Mom is quiet too, so let's do it while we

can."
It sounded as if she needed to be quiet to clean.
We went back to the living room and took the broken

furniture we could carry out to the front door. It took us
about twenty minutes to finish.
This is where the real work begins.
Nishikawa was right. We were only dealing with the big

stuff yesterday and today. It would take more time to collect
and clean the smaller trash.
The smell in the room still lingered. Or rather, the level of

the smell had hardly changed. This was both because the
smell had seeped into the living room and because we had
not yet disposed of the source of the smell.
We went back to Enami-san's room and opened the
package we had bought at Home Center. I don't want to get
my hands too dirty, so I put on plastic gloves. I picked up the
garbage bag and reentered the living room.
The smell stung my nose again. No matter how many

times I smelled it, I couldn't get used to it. It made me feel
uncomfortable.
That's when I noticed it.
On the other side of the dining table. Mother Enami, who

was supposed to be asleep, was no longer there.
This was strange. She had been sleeping just a moment

ago. I wondered if she had woken up.
"——Hey."
Someone called out to me and tapped me on the shoulder.

I turned around.
"......!"
The person there was Mother Enami.
She was talking to me with an expressionless face that I

couldn't read her emotions.
Nishikawa and Enami-san, who were following behind,

were frozen as well.
I wondered when she woke up? Did she knew we were

coming and was waiting for us here, expecting us to come
back to the living room?
"W-What is it?"
My voice trembled because I was under pressure from the
mysterious intimidation.
I have no idea what Mother Enami is thinking about.
"What are you doing right now?"
The tone of her voice was languid and without inflection. I

felt as if intense emotions were swirling behind the lack of
emotion.
In my stead, Enami-san stepped forward.
"I told you yesterday. We're cleaning the living room.

That's all."
Mother Enami opened her eyes wide and closed her

mouth.
Then, like a pair of binoculars on an observatory, she

moved her head to look around the living room. I was
scared. It was creepy that she kept silent. Enami-san's words
came back to me.
"Mom is quiet too, so let's do it while we can.
I figured it might have turned out to be a bad situation.
If I had to guess, I would say that Mother Enami is very

attached to her living room.
"It seems that all the furniture that used to be here and
there is gone. What's going on? It's troubling without it."
No matter how troubling it is, it will not do because they

are broken. However, I was not in a mood to say such a
thing clearly.
"Will they be returned after the cleaning? They will be,
right?"
She looked me straight in the eye. It was the kind of look

that makes you feel as if your body is being sucked into the
depths of her eyes.
Enami-san stood between me and mother Enami.
"I'm throwing it away."
That's why I couldn't hide my surprise at the simple

declaration.
"They are not needed, so I'm throwing them away. It's

broken and dangerous. We should buy new furniture."
"Throwing it away...?"
"Yes."
Nishikawa and I looked at each other. We were both

confused, not knowing what to do.
All we were doing was discarding the broken furniture.

That's all. I wondered why the air was so tense when we
were just doing the obvious.
"Don't worry, Mom. You don't need to be afraid or

anxious. Just leave it to me and I'll take care of it."
These words did not seem to have reached Mother Enami.

There was no change in her expression from earlier. I
wondered if the voice was just passing through my ears.
Just as I was thinking this, Mother Enami moved.
She opened the door to the living room and started
walking down the hallway. We hurriedly followed her.
She looked at the pile of furniture in front of the front

door. She stood still. Her head not moving, her arms
hanging down, she just stood there.
"......Help me with this."
Without waiting for our reply, she grabbed the edge of the
table that had been placed there. She tried to lift it up, but I
guess she couldn't muster the strength. She soon gave up
and started dragging it forcefully.
"—Risa!!"
A loud voice. It was the first time I had ever heard such a
loud voice coming from Enami-san's mother.
"Can't you hear me?"
She said this as she continued to drag it along. A muffled

sound echoed as the table rubbed against the floor. Even so,
Mother Enami didn't seem bothered by it. I guess she didn't
care if the floor was damaged.
"Hurry up."
In this narrow corridor, there was no place to escape or

space to go around. We had no choice but to slowly back
away from Mother Enami as she came at us from the front.
The table came back into the living room with a dull thud.
The surface of the hallway was scuffed and had left a mark.
Mother Enami ended up repositioning the table in front of

the TV all by herself.
The table legs were still broken, so the moment her hands
left the table, the table hit the floor with a thud.
"What do you want to do with it back here? It's still

broken."
Enami-san asked in a gentle tone of voice.
I guess she decided that she shouldn't provoke her mother

too much. To this, Mother Enami did not respond at all.
How could she not have noticed that the leg was broken? It
was as if she didn't care about that.
I wondered if she was satisfied after putting one back.

Mother Enami lay down on the futon on the other side of the
dining table again.
All that was left was the broken furniture and us in a daze.
And there was only a sweltering silence.
Finally, I understood what Enami-san had meant. If we

cleaned up, it would give some changes to the living room.
Mother Enami, who didn't like that, would get in the way.
Even if it wasn't meant to be inhabited, or even if she was in
bed with a cold, she wouldn't allow that change.
"What should we do...?"
Nishikawa's eyes were swimming. Enami-san said.
"I'm sorry to make you uncomfortable, but I think we

have to keep on cleaning little by little, even if we're
interrupted like this. Otherwise, we won't be able to finish
anytime soon."
It was true that one piece of furniture had been put back,
but the rest was still in the foyer. It's not like we're back to
square one.
"I'm really sorry..."
Enami-san was depressed again. The fatigue was clearly

visible on her face.
It's not just this time. There must have been many times
like this in the past. That's why she couldn't move forward.
I don't know about Mother Enami's situation. An

unreasonable change might only irritate her. Should we give
up, or should we move on? I don't know if either is right.
However, if Enami-san still wants to continue,
We have no choice but to move forward step by step,

even if we have to force it. That's what I thought, too.
***
A bus was slowly speeding away from me. I watched it

from a little distance. I held the collar of my coat with my
hand, but it was still too cold. With my other hand, I touch
the screen of my phone.
Naoya Ookusu: I'm at the station, how about you?
Shiori Fujisaki: I'm already here too.
At the south exit of the station, there is a large bus

roundabout. It has a nice view, but I didn't see Fujisaki
there. By the bicycle parking lot, I sent her a line message.
Naoya Ookusu: Are you by any chance at the north exit?
It's closer if you go from the south.
I received a reply right away.
Shiori Fujisaki: Oh, I see. I'll be right there.
After a few minutes of waiting, Fujisaki came down the

stairs. I waved to her and she noticed me. With her racket
case slung over her shoulder, she walked up to me.
"I'm sorry. I should've said the south exit."
"It's okay. Don't worry about it."
It was probably the first time we had met outside of

school. The uniform I was used to seeing her in looked
prettier than usual. I looked at my watch and saw that it was
already past 5:30 pm.
"Ookusu-kun... you're not wearing your uniform huh."
I nodded.
I have already done my shopping and changed my clothes.

I left Enami-san's house about an hour ago. Once home, I
checked the fridge and bought what I needed after getting
dressed.
"...You have a different atmosphere than usual."
"Really?"
My outfit was quite simple. I was wearing a beige coat and

jeans. It's probably the first time I've seen Fujisaki in casual
clothes.
"Fujisaki, you look like you just came straight out of the
badminton club."
When I said that, for some reason, Fujisaki's eyes widened

in a flurry, and then she stepped back.
"Yes, that's right. I thought it would be bad to make you

wait too long."
She took another step back. I wondered if she was

avoiding my vicinity. I took a step forward to test it out, and
Fujisaki stepped back again.
"Let's go, Ookusu-kun."
"It's okay, you know."
"Eh?"
Somehow I knew what was going on, so I said softly.
"I don't think you smell of sweat at all, so don't worry

about it."
"No, no, no, it's not like I'm not worried about that!"
But my words seemed to have had a positive effect, and

she stopped pulling away from me.
We started walking side by side along the railroad tracks.
There are not many commercial facilities in this area.

There are only convenience stores and dry cleaning stores.
The houses stand side by side on the flat land with a good
view. The north entrance has more department stores and
entertainment facilities. As we walked along, freezing in the
cold, we eventually came to a large bridge.
"I didn't know there was a river here. It's pretty big."
Indeed, the width of the river is large, about 20 meters.

The bridge is arched, so if you stand in the middle, you can
look down on the river from a high position.
"It's not a very clean river, though. It's not like you can
bathe in it."
I've lived here since I was a little kid, but I've never
experienced the benefits of having a river.
We crossed the bridge and walked for about five minutes

to my house. It's a very ordinary house. It was a two-story
house with black tiles and white walls. There was a small
gate in front of the entrance.
"Come on in."
When I opened the front door, my sister's loafers were

already lined up on the wooden floor. I wondered if it was
because she was nervous about Fujisaki's arrival that they
were arranged differently than usual.
"Pardon my intrusion..."
It seemed that Dad hadn't come home yet. There was no

one in the living room. Sayaka was probably in her room.
"Go ahead and sit on that couch."
I poured a cup of barley tea and placed it in front of

Fujisaki. I then walked upstairs and knocked on Sayaka's
room door.
"Yes."
I turned the doorknob when I heard her answer.
Apparently, Sayaka was cleaning her room. She hid as

many of her otaku hobbies as she could and gathered the
mess into plastic bags. It seemed that she had already made
a lot of progress in cleaning the room, and to the casual
observer, the usual mess was unrecognizable.
"She's here."
"I know. I was going to come, even if my shitty brother

didn't call me."
After hiding what she couldn't hide under the quilt of the
bed, Sayaka left the room. She walked past me and went
down the stairs.
I followed her back to the living room. Fujisaki, who was

stretched out on the sofa, noticed us and turned to look at
us.
"Ah, Sayaka-chan! You look so cute in your casual clothes

too!"
That's when I noticed. She wasn't wearing her usual

sweatshirt. She was wearing a pink sweater with long sleeves
and big bottoms. She had also untied her hair and
straightened it.
"No, no, not at all..."
Apparently, she was embarrassed to be dressed in her

usual attire. She was wearing something a little more
fashionable. To be honest, I've rarely seen my sister dressed
like that.
"Mm, the boys of the world won't leave you alone like this.
Even though I'm a girl, still I'm being mesmerized."
"Oh, I'm not such..."
I guess she's not very good at receiving compliments.

Sayaka seemed to be at a loss as to what to do.
"You two go ahead and start studying. I'll make dinner in

the meantime." I said.
Sayaka nodded. I thought they were going to study in the

living room, but they decided to do it in her room. That's
probably why she was cleaning up earlier.
After the two of them went upstairs, I took out the

ingredients I had already bought from the refrigerator. I had
decided to make curry today.
***
...About an hour later, my dad came home. He noticed a

strange pair of shoes at the door. He came into the living
room cautiously, and when he spotted me, he quickly
approached me.
"Hey, is someone here?"
I told him briefly what had happened. Then my father's

eyes widened.
"A girl? Naoya brought a girl into the house?"
I didn't want him to use the word 'brought'. I only invited

her as a token of my gratitude. When I said that, "I see, so
that's how it is on the surface." he responded mysteriously.
"I'm having her watch over Sayaka's studies. That's why
they're both upstairs."
"You're such a schemer. Using Sayaka to ensnare her is a

terrible thing. You're planning to make her a family friend
and then make her your own woman. I knew you were a
smart kid, but I'm terrified that you could think of
something like that."
I kept my mouth shut, thinking there was no point in

saying anything else. My father was fired up for some
reason. He thought that he shouldn't fail in front of the girl
his son had set his eyes on.
After another ten minutes or so, the curry was ready.
"Dad, I'm sorry, but can you go get them?"
"Me?"
I ignored him and took out a few plates from the cupboard
for each of us. When my father noticed that I didn't answer,
he reluctantly went upstairs.
The thought that Fujisaki would soon be eating my

cooking made me nervous. I had prepared it more carefully
than usual. As I served the curry, I let out a big breath.
Soon, Sayaka and the others came downstairs.
"It smells delicious."
Fujisaki helped me with the dishes I was trying to carry.

When everyone was lined up, I noticed that my father was
beckoning to me. I walk over to my father at the edge of the
living room.
"Let's get this straight, shall we?"
My father, more excited than ever, put his hand on my

shoulder.
"I've just heard from her that her name is Fujisaki Shiori
and that she's your classmate. And as you said, she has been
helping with Sayaka's studies, and you brought her home as
a thank you. She doesn't seem to dislike it at all, rather she
seems to be enjoying it."
"......What?"
The misunderstanding from earlier is still continuing. He

still thinks it was a strategic move to win over Fujisaki.
"You're a good cook, that's for sure. It's no wonder since

you've been cooking every day for the past few years. Using
your strengths to appeal to the opposite sex can be very
effective. And the fact that she doesn't mind you inviting her
to your house is proof that you have some traction."
"No, it's wrong. That's not the point."
But he didn't seem to hear my words. With a mysterious

gesture of "Yes, yes." he was passing the words from one ear
to the other.
"I've only talked to her a little bit, but my impression of

her is not bad. She seems to have a good personality, and she
doesn't have the arrogance of a good-looking girl. She seems
to be a very good candidate. I'm impressed. You have a good
eye. I'm proud of you as my son."
"Stop talking nonsense and let's eat quickly. Fujisaki has

been glancing at us for a while now, you know."
"Don't worry. leave it to me."
The conversation was not going well. My father has

already come to a conclusion, and no matter how I try to
explain it to him, he will not change his mind. He's the type
of person who makes a lot of assumptions. It can't be helped.
"I'll show off your good points in this match. I used to

attend blind dates 10 days in a row, so I can give you the
right assistance. There's no need to be anxious. If you leave
everything to me, I can guarantee you a 100% success rate in
marriage."
"There's a lot I want to say, but I'll get angry if you say
anything else."
"It's the natural order of things for a man of your age to

fall in love with a woman. There's no need to be shy about
it."
"That's not the point."
My father went back to the room, keeping his stance that

he would follow up if anything happened. I followed him.
Fujisaki sat in front of me, my father beside me, and

Sayaka sat diagonally from me. When I said "Itadakimasu."
the three of them put their hands together as well.
I brought my own spoon to my mouth, but my eyes never

left Fujisaki in front of me.
Fujisaki held a spoon in her hand. The spoon sank into

the curry along with the rice. Then it was brought to
Fujisaki's mouth.
Her mouth moved several times. After swallowing, she
said,
"Delicious......"
I was relieved to hear those words. Even though I had

tasted it, I wasn't sure if it would suit Fujisaki's palate.
"It's a little different from the curry we eat at home... It's

really good."
"I didn't do anything unusual, though. I just make it with

care."
"You're really a good cook, aren't you, Ookusu-kun?"
I got embarrassed when I was praised head-on. When I

cook every day, I discover things little by little. Through the
accumulation of these discoveries, I gradually became able
to make delicious dishes.
"You're Fujisaki-san, right...?
My father, who usually starts eating first, was talking to

her with his spoon on the table. There was no hint of
mischievousness in his expression.
Fujisaki straightened her back.
"Yes."
"What do you think of Naoya?"
"Bu...!?"
I almost spit out the tea I was trying to drink. This father
has done it.
The spoon fell out of Fujisaki's hand and hit the edge of
the bowl. She was clearly flustered by the directness of the
question.
"W-wha-what do you mean by what I think?"
"C-Calm down, Fujisaki."
The panic was spreading to me. I hated my father for

looking at Fujisaki with a smiling face. What do you mean,
leave it to me? That's a bit too blunt!
"What? I meant what I said."
"That's sexual harassment, you know."
I wonder if this father has a good relationship with female

colleagues at work enough to ask "Do you have a boyfriend?"
or "Do you like that guy?" or something like that. Otherwise,
he wouldn't have asked such questions in this situation.
"No, I didn't..."
"Shut up. Keep your mouth shut, you shitty Dad."
Sayaka also glared at her father. It seems to have been an

annoying comment even from Sayaka's perspective.
"But—"
"—No buts. You really need to shut up. If you don't shut
up here, I'll never speak to you again."
As expected, there was nothing he could do when she said

that much. My father closed his mouth.
"Sorry, Fujisaki."
Fujisaki picked up the spoon again.
"Mm, I don't mind. I was just surprised when he suddenly

asked that..."
"I'll bury the old man later, so eat your curry slowly."
"Yeah."
He has quieted down, but he doesn't seem to understand

why she was getting angry. He was tossing his head and
chomping away.
"How are your studies going, Sayaka?"
"It's better than yesterday."
It seems to be going well. Fujisaki also nodded.
"I think she has a good head on her shoulders. It's easy for
me to teach her.
"I'm glad to hear that."
However, my father suddenly returned.
"Fujisaki-san is getting along well with Sayaka, isn't she?

You've come this far, you're like a member of our family."
No good, I can't leave my dad alone, he'll get me into

trouble.
With that thought in mind, I picked up a small bottle that

was sitting nearby. It was about ten centimeters long. Inside,
there was a red liquid.
"Dad, you forgot to pour it in."
He took off the cap and poured the contents into the
bottle without waiting for any response. The red liquid fell
on the curry roux and turned it a dark color.
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"It's ketchup. No problem."
The label was removed from the bottle, so it should be

hard to tell what was in it at a glance.
"But it's Tabasc—"
"—It's delicious, you should try it."
I took his spoon and scooped up the blackened part and

brought it to his mouth.
"Oh, hey, Naoya. Hey..."
"You gotta trust me."
His eyes were swimming, but he finally snapped out of it.

His small mouth opened, and I shoved it in there.
"Hey, it's just ketchup, right?"
"Huh? Sure, it's not spicy."
He chewed for a while, but soon his face turned bright

red.
"As I thought It's Tabascoooooooooooooo!!"
"Oops, I think I made a mistake."
My father, who is a picky eater, is not a fan of spicy food.

It seemed to be too spicy for him, so he drank a lot of tea
from the cup with tears in his eyes.
"Oh, Dad, are you okay?"
"Ha~a, Ha~a..."
He was so out of breath that he couldn't even respond to

Fujisaki's words. He usually asks for his curry to be sweet, so
the spiciness of Tabasco was enough to knock him out.
"Naoya, can you give me more, more water, please...?"
"Can't help it."
I left my seat and went into the kitchen with my father's

cup. In the refrigerator, there was a cup of chilled barley tea.
It was then that I heard my father's voice again.
"Fujisaki-san..."
The way he was calling out to her was like that of a

pervert.
"Didn't you just say, 'Oh, dad'...?"
I took out another drink from the refrigerator, poured it

into a glass, and brought it to my father.
"Come on, drink up."
"Yeah, thanks..."
He was so thirsty for a drink that he drank it down in one

gulp until the bottom fell out.
"Finally, I can relax with this—"
"Oh, I'm sorry. I put the beer in by mistake."
"—My throat hurtssssssssssssssss!"
He screamed in agony, clutching his neck.
The carbonation of the beer seemed to have soaked into

his throat. It had gone according to plan.
"Shitty brother..."
"Ookusu-kun..."
I could feel the eyes on me, wondering if I was overdoing

it, but I wanted them to understand how I felt. It was a
necessary sacrifice for the sake of a peaceful meal.
"Naoya, Naoya, isn't that too much? I was thinking for

your sake..."
And that wasn't the only step in the plan. My father has
other weaknesses.
"—I was thinking... Eh? Ah, the world is spinning, Naoya."
He has a weakness in alcohol. Not only does he hate spicy

food, but he was also easily drunk, which made his face even
redder. He can't seem to keep his equilibrium, and he has
been turning my head in circles for a while now.
"Naoya. Hey~, what am I doing? I can't find any curry

anywhere. I have a spoon, but there's nothing to eat. Where
did it go?"
Of course, the curry has been in front of my father for a

while now, but he's too dazed to know that.
"I'm sorry, I made you drink the wrong beer, you're
drunk. You should take it easy. I'll cover the curry with
plastic wrap, so you can eat it after you sober up."
"I didn't quite understand it, but I will do that."
I took my father by the shoulders and carried him to the

Japanese-style room where the futon was already laid out.
He would not be able to recover for at least three hours.
"Forgive me. But it's dad's fault."
I mumbled to myself after laying him down on the futon.
I quickly walked back to the dining table.
Then Sayaka sighed loudly, "Well, I guess he deserved it."
I gave a small nod.
As usual, my father slept well and soon I could hear him

snoring from the Japanese-style room. As promised, I
wrapped the curry he was about to eat and sat down on the
chair in silence.
"...Is your father okay?"
If you're asking if his body is okay after all that, I'd say it's
fine. But if you're asking if his head is okay, then I have no
choice but to shake my head..."
"Of course the former. But yeah, he's a very amusing

father."
I'm sorry for making you feel uncomfortable.
"I apologize for my father's rudeness. Fujisaki-san, please
don't hold it against him...."
It was clearly written on Sayaka's face that she wanted to

kill her father.
"I was a little surprised, though. Because he talked to me

like I was already part of the family..."
I'm sure my dad was just excited. I haven't brought a girl

home since I was in elementary school. I guess I've been
worrying him so much that he's lost his nerve. That said,
there are limits.
"H-Hey...."
Fujisaki said with her face turned down.
"What did you and your father talk about before dinner?"
"He was wondering if the curry was sweet enough. As you

saw, he dislikes spicy food, so I always make it sweet. And he
didn't want you to know that he, a grown man, only eats
sweet curry, so he secretly asked me."
"Shitty Brother... is being talkative."
Sayaka gave me a quizzical look.
"Oh, I see. I thought it was..."
Fujisaki fell silent there.
This heavy silence was all my father's fault. There are

things you should do and things you shouldn't do.
Sayaka glanced at me and Fujisaki, confused. I don't know
what she sensed, but she looked very uncomfortable.
"F-Fujisaki-san... can I have a moment?"
"Eh?"
For some reason, Sayaka pointed at my face.
"Can you stare at my brother's face?"
Fujisaki nodded her head but apparently had no choice

but to comply. She stared straight at my face.
When I look at her like this, I still think Fujisaki is cute. In

our class, there are many guys who like Fujisaki. There is no
reason not to like her, not only because of her looks but also
because of her personality.
My eyes met with Fujisaki's eyes.
Immediately, she averted her gaze. However, it's not a big

shift. She just shifted her eyes to the side of mine.
"Is this enough Sayaka-chan?"
"I see."
I don't know what convinced her, but she wrinkled her

brow and gave me a troubled look.
"What are you trying to do?"
"It's none of your business, shitty brother. You can go on

living your life in a daze. If this were a battlefield, you'd be
so stupefied that you'd get shot in the back."
"Oh, yeah?"
There was a hint of disdain in Sayaka's eyes.
***
After a while, everyone finished eating their curry.

Fujisaki thanked me once again for the food. I was glad to
hear that she liked it.
"I'll take care of all the cleanup. Fujisaki and Sayaka can
go ahead and study. Also, if you're going to be too late, I'll
drop you off, so just call me when you're leaving."
"Th... There's no need to go that far."
"Fujisaki-san. Don't worry about this brother of mine, you

can make use of him freely."
"It's just a quick walk to the station. It's not a big deal. I'll
be fine."
"Yeah. Thank you so much."
The two of them went upstairs.
I could still hear snoring coming from the Japanese-style

room. At this rate, he wouldn't wake up for a while.
***
About an hour and a half later, Fujisaki came down from

upstairs. I had just finished all my chores and was catching
my breath. I was studying world history on my phone, but I
looked up when I noticed Fujisaki approaching.
"I'd better get going."
"Okay. I'll get my coat."
I quickly retrieved it from my room and pulled on my
sleeves. My father was still asleep. I had a feeling that he
wouldn't wake up until morning.
The two of us walked out the door together. To be honest,

it was cold. I still can't get used to this cold.
There seemed to be some dogs fighting somewhere, two

different kinds of barking going on in the night. I don't know
if they start fighting at night, or if I just don't hear them
during the day. But they are always more noticeable at night.
"I caught a glimpse of you studying on your phone earlier.

It's an app called 'World History Navigator' right?"
"Do you know about that?"
"I use it too. It's pretty useful."
When you have a smartphone, there are times when you

end up playing with it. If you open this app at that time, you
won't waste time. This kind of accumulation makes a
surprisingly big difference.
"You're already studying at every chance you get. No

wonder I can't win."
"Well, that just happened by chance. I just happened to be

looking for some studying to do."
"That's a lie."
Actually, it's a lie. But I didn't want to say that I was

studying too much. I was embarrassed.
After a short walk, I soon saw the bridge. I could see from
a distance that the station building was glittering.
In the middle of the bridge, I heard the sound of footsteps
behind me stop.
I turned around and saw that Fujisaki had stopped.
"Hey."
Her voice was quiet. I tilted my head.
"What's wrong?"
She seemed strange. She didn't look at me but kept her

head downward.
"Hey, Ookusu-kun..."
"Yeah?"
At my feet, a long shadow was seen. It was cast by a feeble

streetlight.
Fujisaki said without turning her face toward me.
"Look, I'm sorry if I made you upset by saying this..."
"It's okay. If it's Fujisaki, I don't mind no matter what you

say."
To tell the truth, I was flustered. This was the first time I
had ever seen her look so uncomfortable.
Even so, Fujisaki continued with trepidation.
"You're peculiar, aren't you, Ookusu-kun?"
....Peculiar, huh? I was taken aback by her unexpected

words.
"Well, I think I'm normal. Well, I guess you could say I'm
a little serious."
"That's not what I meant..."
Something's definitely not right.
It's awfully quiet. We could hear each other's voices with a

clear distinct outline.
"It's like you have something else on your mind than the
rest of us. I'm sorry, I can't really put my finger on it."
"...I don't really get it, but did it look that way to you?"
"Yeah, it did."
The words were spoken more slowly than usual, but they
sounded strong in my ears.
"...Is that all the time?"
"Maybe not all the time. But you know. Since I started
talking to Ookusu-kun, I might have felt that way little by
little. I'm not saying that it's a bad thing or anything. I just
wanted to say it now."
"I see..."
If that's the case, it's because of my past.
On the surface, I'm acting normal, as if the past never

happened. But deep down inside me, that past has always
been there, and it has never left me.
That's why I've always been the best in my grade, and I'm
afraid of going astray.
Although I try not to show such a figure, Fujisaki might
have sensed it nonetheless.
"Whether you are laughing or angry, you seem to be

somewhere far away. The emotions on your face and the
emotions you have are two separate things. You are not
laughing from the heart, you are not really angry, and you
seem to be living while looking at something else."
"......"
Fujisaki's words were neither condemning nor

comforting. It's just a matter of stating the facts plainly.
That's why it stuck with me. I didn't know she thought of

me that way.
"Are you mad?"
"No. If that's what you think, it's my responsibility. I'll be

careful in the future."
"I don't mind it. That's part of who you are, Ookusu-kun.
Just that..."
A gust of wind blew. Her knee-length skirt swayed. The

wind blows upwards, fluttering the bangs in front of
Fujisaki's eyes and the scarf wrapped around her neck.
"It's just that, there's something that's really bothering

me... I'm not trying to pester you, Ookusu-kun."
Fujisaki walked towards me, step by step.
She stopped when the distance between us was reduced to

about one meter. In the darkness of the night, I could see her
beady eyes. I let out a small gasp.
"Why do you care so much about Enami-san, Ookusu-
kun?"
"Eh?"
I had no intention of doing that. I've always been passive.

Enami-san is the one waiting for me in front of the main
gate. In the middle of the night, Enami-san is the one
sending me a text message. She is the one asking me for a
favor......
It's not always my choice. As if I was caught up in it, I

came to know about Enami-san, got involved with Enami-
san, and talked with Enami-san.
That's all.
"I don't particularly..."
But Fujisaki shook her head vigorously.
"Even though you seem to be looking into the distance

usually, I feel that you are staring straight back at Enami-
san. It looks like you're letting your emotions shine through
and you're paying attention to what's right in front of you. I
just couldn't stop thinking about it...
Fujisaki took another step closer.
"It was the same at that time. Even when you tried to
study with Enami-san and Nishikawa-san at the family
restaurant, you were really angry. I've never seen you so
serious and angry before, but in front of Enami-san, you
revealed such emotions."
"You're exaggerating..."
My voice was so quiet that no one could hear me.
"When Ookusu-kun was with Enami-san, you were so

lively. Even when you were shopping with Nishikawa-san
and Enami-san in front of the main gate, you showed a face
you don't usually show. "
"...Nothing like that."
I can't strongly deny it, maybe because I realize it

somewhere in my heart.
"I was surprised. I knew that you and Enami-san often

went home together, but I didn't know when you became
such good friends. The face of Ookusu-kun that you hadn't
shown to me was being brought out more and more."
I was finally at a loss for words.
Enami-san is somewhat like me. I felt as if my deepest

feelings were being dragged out of me by her.
I wonder if that's why. Is that why my expression looks

different? I wasn't aware of it at all, but I wondered if I had
somehow become that way.
I don't understand myself.
"Ookusu-kun."
Fujisaki called out to me.
"Why did you invite me to your house today?"
"That's..."
I can give as many reasons as I want. For Sayaka. To
thank her. But that's not what she wanted me to say.
The air was painful. It wasn't just because of the coldness.
It would be a lie if I said I didn't have any ulterior motives

at all. That's what Sayaka had pointed out before.
But that didn't mean that I wanted to go out with her or

anything.
I had no choice but to remain silent. I moved my gaze to

cover up my silence. The river is flowing with the sound of
water.
This is a wedge.
It's because I am obsessed with the past. I know that.
Indeed, I may not be out of the past yet. I thought I had

escaped a little, but I'm still stuck in a deep hole.
I'm afraid to step out.
I think I'm worthless. I have nothing. And I'm empty and

I'm taking in knowledge into my body as if I'm trying to
moisten my dry throat.
I believe that such a worthless person should not fall in

love with someone. The wedge that indirectly killed my
mother is still stuck deep in my heart.
For me, this was a situation I wanted to escape from.
Don't look at me. Don't care about me. I don't matter. I'm
a total pile of junk. Just leave this guy alone.
That's why I've been pretending not to notice.
—I knew that Fujisaki might be in love with me.
And now, Fujisaki is stepping into my feelings one step at

a time....
"I'm sorry. I just couldn't stand it lately... It's getting

hard..."
Something hit me in the chest with a thud.
I was surprised. I never dreamed that Fujisaki would

behave like that. Because until now, I had only treated her as
a good friend.
Occasionally, I would get a flutter in my heart. But it was

never more than that. Except for that time about... a year
ago.
"These are my feelings..."
"......"
For a while after that, we didn't say a word to each other.
Only my heart was beating fast.
My emotions are all over the place. It's not that I don't feel
happy. But I was also feeling scared and impatient to escape.
The coldness of the soles of my shoes. The light of the

streetlamp spread dimly in my eyes.
Every time the wind blew, I felt as if my body heat was

being sucked away.
And then there was Fujisaki's temperature, which I could
feel in my chest.
I couldn't say a word.
"......u......"
I felt ashamed of myself and frustrated at the same time.
I think Fujisaki must have been very brave. Otherwise, the

normally quiet Fujisaki would not have done this.
If you are a man, if you are a person before that, you face
it head-on and deal with it. It is definitely a situation that
demands that.
This is not the time to stand there like this and be silent.
I know that. But there's nothing I can do.
I can feel Fujisaki's small breath against my chest. I

looked up at the sky.
At that moment, I remembered the time when I met

Fujisaki.
Chapter 03: First Year High School
It was about two years ago.
In the gymnasium, hundreds of students were standing

and looking ahead.
It had just begun with the vice principal's speech, followed

by the singing of the school song, which I didn't even know,
and then the principal's talk.
We were in the middle of a high school entrance

ceremony. The students nearby looked a little nervous.
That's because we've just entered a new school.
A new school building. New classmates. New uniforms.
As far as I could see, I didn't know anything.
Everything felt fresh. I took a deep breath.
—I have to start all over again here.
In a place where no one knows me, I have to get my school

life back on track.
It all went wrong when I was in junior high school.
In reaction to the junior high school entrance exams, I

had a rough time. I disobeyed the teachers for no reason,
hung out with the bad people, and fought with them
repeatedly. I dyed my hair blonde, wore flashy clothes, and
caused trouble for many people.
—That all changed six months after I became a
delinquent.
I lost someone I cared about.
I can't let that happen again.
It was with this kind of determination that I had come to

this day.
The principal of this school stood on the stage and went

on endlessly with a rambling story. The topic of conversation
went from one direction to the other, and I couldn't even tell
what he was talking about anymore. Probably no one was
listening seriously.
Probably not a single person was taking him seriously.
I looked around at the students around me, using the long

conversation as background music.
There was no one I knew. No one seemed to know about

my past.
That's the kind of school I chose to take the entrance

exam for. In the first place, the junior high school I was in
allowed students to go up the escalator to high school, so
most people would choose to stay at the school.
I would be reborn again in an environment where no one

knew me. I wanted to spend a decent youth, making friends,
studying, and sometimes doing silly things.
—And for that reason, if they know, there's no point.
I looked down at my outfit.
I had checked my appearance many times before I went
out. The tie on my blazer was neatly fastened. I tucked my
shirt into my pants and wrapped my new belt a little tighter.
My hairstyle was quite normal, with short black hair. It
might be a little tacky, but no one would think I was a
delinquent.
After more than ten minutes of the principal's talk, I

heard a voice from next door.
"It's too long."
A male student with a shaved head was standing there.

There was a fat boy right behind him.
"Too long indeed."
The fat one said in the same tone. His voice was a bit loud
and conspicuous.
The rest of the students remained quiet. In high school,

more and more students are concerned about their
appearance. They are also expected to act with an open
mind. However, neither of them seemed to be paying any
attention to such things at all.
Maybe that's why. I couldn't help but stare at the two of

them.
"Ah."
The one with the shaved head was the first to notice my
gaze. He immediately put his hand in front of his face.
"Sorry."
"No..."
I didn't mean to blame him. That's what I meant by "No."
In fact, I even liked him. Even though I decided to be an
honor student, I still retained a rebellious streak at the core.
The guy with a shaved head was looking at my face. As I

was wondering what to do, the other guy's face turned into a
smirk.
"You're also thinking that this is a little too long, aren't

you?"
He spoke again in a quiet voice. I nodded.
"He's been talking for about ten minutes now. The whole
talk is a mess as well."
That's right. I bet he himself doesn't even know what he's

talking about. He was talking about his own kids at one
point, but before you know it, he's talking about how the
baseball team recently got to the top."
"Yeah, I guess so. I think I'm getting sleepy."
I want to go home early today, you know. Because eFan

(game) has just been released and I want to play it all the
time."
I thought it was amazing that he could be so forthcoming

with me when we had never met before.
"I believe we are allowed to leave before noon. We'll just

get our textbooks and stuff today."
"There's no need for an entrance ceremony. They should

just hand out the textbooks, right?"
I thought exactly the same thing. If it had been me in
junior high school, I probably would have just ignored it and
gone home. Of course, I would never do that again.
"Saito." said the fat student standing behind him.
"Teacher is staring at you."
"Oh, seriously?"
Both I and the shaved head guy next to me quickly turned

around. The principal's talk turned to how hot it was the
previous summer and whether global warming exists.
Something hit me on the arm. A shaved head was poking

me with his elbow, looking ahead.
Then he spoke coyly into my ear.
"You're probably an otaku too, right?"
He smiled at me.
I was surprised. I didn't expect him to think that way.
Probably, my expression at that moment was

unintelligible from an outsider's point of view. In fact, the
shaved head guy looked at me suspiciously.
It made me happy. I'm sure I was smiling.
This was the first conversation I had with Saito and

Shindo.
***
Saito and Shindo apparently went to the same junior high

school. Although they were not aiming for the same high
school, they found themselves in the same school.
Perhaps it was just a coincidence, but we soon became

friends.
"You're not very good at games, are you?"
Saito commented to me when I bought a game they were

playing and we were playing it together.
I think it's true. To begin with, I hadn't played many

games since I was little. When I was in elementary school, I
used to study as soon as I got home. I was taught that it was
important to get a good night's sleep, so I always went to bed
around 10 o'clock.
I guess that's why. It took me a long time to get the hang

of the game.
"I guess games are really deep."
"That's right. In a fighting game, it's the attack and

defense of a single frame. If it's a racing game, it's the
detailed control techniques. There's a lot of things you can't
do unless you turn your brain to the full."
"That's true."
It was a world I didn't know existed. No wonder the rest of

the world was obsessed with it. When I was in elementary
school, I used to make fun of people who played games all
the time, but now I can understand how they felt.
Having fun is important. We live by our emotions. As one

of my favorite authors said: 'We live to satisfy our A10
neural system'. Money, love, and competition all exist to
satisfy the mind.
"By the way..."
Saito looked at Shindo and me and said,
"They're going to decide on the committee soon. Have you

decided what you're going to do?"
"Is it mandatory?"
I nodded at Shindo's words.
"Homeroom teacher said that we have to do some activity

in one of the semesters."
"That's a pain."
The look on both of their faces said that they were not
interested in anything but games.
"The ones that seem like too much trouble are the class
committee and the library committee. If possible, I'd like to
be someone who only has to work hard one day a year.
Maybe the sports committee."
"Doesn't that require a lot of preparation?"
"Yeah, I guess so. Then definitely not."
Incidentally, when I was in junior high school, I was on

the lifestyle committee. Again, there was very little to do. I
just attended the occasional committee meeting.
"Well, you never know what you're going to become, so

just go with the flow."
Shindo and I nodded. It's no use thinking about it at this

stage.
***
The committee members were decided by the homeroom

teacher.
The types of committees were almost the same as in

junior high school. Basically, the duties at school are almost
the same.
So my classmates knew which ones looked easy and which

ones looked hard.
The most popular ones were the Beautification Committee

and the Lifestyle Committee. Neither of them had much
work to do, except for the occasional lunch break. The next
most popular were the Broadcasting Committee, the Culture
Committee, and the Sports Committee. These seemed to be
more popular because they seemed to be fun than because
they were easy.
Me, Saito, and Shindo all ran for the Beautification

Committee.
"If there are more candidates than the number of seats

available, the committee members must decide by rock-
paper-scissors."
Our homeroom teacher instructed us to gather and play

rock-paper-scissors at once. Sadly, Saito and I lost.
"That's too bad."
We gritted our teeth in frustration at Shindo's triumphant

face.
In the end, it was decided that Saito would be on the

election committee and I would be on the library committee.
The reason I ended up on the library committee was that I
lost the rock-paper-scissors game until the very end. It just
didn't work out.
Apparently, being on the library committee is a lot of

work.
Once a week, I would be tied up in the library. Apparently,

the job consists mainly of working at the counter and
organizing the books. I like novels, but I don't think I want
to spend all my time in the library.
Three days after I was appointed to the committee, we

had an early meeting.
There was one person from each class, and since there
were four classes in each of the three grades, there were
twelve people in total. I wanted to complain about the need
for such a large number of people, but I couldn't say much
because I thought it might make my job easier.
"Now, I'm going to explain to you what we do."
The lady librarian said. She was probably in her late

thirties.
There were three main things:
The first is to work at the counter, accepting book loans

and borrowing.
The second is to organize the books. This includes

deciding on the layout of the books and requesting the
return of books that have not been returned by the due date.
The third is the work related to new book purchases. This
includes deciding what kind of books to procure, registering
the acquired materials, and putting stickers and branding on
them.
Basically, we decide which day of the week we will be in

charge of (Monday through Friday) and perform the first
and second tasks on that day. The third is to be decided at
the monthly book committee meeting.
"So, the sooner you decide which day of the week it is for
you, the better."
As told by the librarian, the book committee members

discussed among themselves. The upperclassmen took the
lead in organizing the meeting, and we decided on a day of
the week that would not interfere with our club activities. By
the way, since I was in the science club, which I didn't know
what to expect, I told them that any day of the week would
be fine.
In the end, I was assigned to Tuesday, and since there

were twelve of us, there would be two or three of us for each
day of the week. Tuesday happened to be the only day of the
week with two members.
The other committee member was a girl. Her hair was

braided on the side. She looked mature. She spoke to me as
soon as she was chosen.
"Looking forward to working with you from now on."
And I replied, "Likewise/"
I thought she was a cute girl. I was thinking that I had no
luck till then, but I might have been unexpectedly lucky.
The girl — Shiori Fujisaki — was looking at me with a soft

smile on her face.
***
It was our first day on duty.
The librarian lady, Noguchi-san, instructed us on various

things.
After giving us an overview of what we usually do, she

went on to explain the specifics.
"Lending and borrowing are managed using a computer.

Each book has a shelf number and a book number, which we
enter and check off as checked out. The name and class of
the person who borrowed the book are also entered. Isn't
that simple?"
I thought she was an ostentatious speaker. However, the

way she taught us was very polite.
She showed us the actual screen of the computer and

asked us to try it out.
We did as we were told, and it was easy to learn.
"After that, all you have to do is blank them out upon

return. It's a lot of manual work, but the system doesn't
allow for automatic registration with barcodes. This is the
way it has to be if we want to manage it digitally."
Not many people borrow books in the first place,

Noguchi-san added. Then she pointed to a cardboard box
near the counter.
"Also, we just got a new book in. These books will need a
few things done to them. I explained it to you yesterday,
remember?"
Fujisaki next to me nodded.
"You decide which shelf and which number to put the

book in, and then you issue a sticker. Then you put a
transparent book cover on top of it. ......"
"That's right. You remembered it well."
Noguchi-san opened the cardboard. When I looked inside,

I found a surprisingly large amount of books. There were
about 15 books. The books were quite thick.
"Let's just register one book for the sake of learning."
Noguchi-san picked up a book titled "Showa Writers'

Masterpiece Collection 1". The book was a hardcover and
was so wide that it could be used as a pillow.
"To register a book, you have to choose a genre. For

example, Ookusu. What genre is this book in? Please answer
me while looking at the list."
The list was handed out on paper in advance. The number

of genres was about thirty. I wasn't sure if I would be able to
figure it out on such short notice.
"......Literature (Japanese fiction), isn't it?"
"That's right. You caught up fast."
Fujisaki and I looked at each other and laughed. Noguchi-
san seems like a nice person, but she's a little strange.
"Japanese novels are at shelf number 22, and then book

number, which is the last number plus one, since they are
numbered in the order in which they were acquired."
If you search by shelf number, the books on that shelf will

be listed and displayed. The books are listed by number, so
you can find the next number by looking at the bottom. You
can then click on the 'Add' button and enter the title, author,
publisher, and book number of the book.
"I think you now know the whole process. Then, I'd like
you to work in two groups today. One of you will work at the
counter. The other one will work with me to register new
books. There are two computers, so I'll take one of them to
the back."
After discussing with Fujisaki which of the two we should

do, we decided that Fujisaki would work at the counter and I
would register new books.
The registration of new books was surprisingly difficult. It

was not so difficult to decide on the genre and number of the
books. But the problem was attaching the book cover. Being
a clumsy person, I made many mistakes and ended up
throwing away many covers.
Noguchi-san showed me a sample, but I knew it would

take some time to get used to it.
"Don't worry about it too much, it happens to everyone at

first."
"Yes."
We struggled with it for a while. Noguchi-san didn't try to
help much, probably to get me used to it.
After about an hour, I was finally able to finish everything.
When I reported to Noguchi-san, she said I should take a

break, so I took a seat at the back of the library to catch my
breath. It was quiet. Now that it was not a test period, there
were only a few people in the room. Some people were
studying, some were reading books in silence.
I feel settled. I thought.
Sure, it sounds like a lot of work, but maybe it's not such a
bad committee after all.
As I rested there for a while, I saw Fujisaki, who was at

the counter, stand up. After talking with Noguchi-san,
pointing to the returned books, she walked out with them.
There seemed to be about five or six books. Watching her

carry them unsteadily, I quickly ran up to Fujisaki.
"I'll hold it."
"Ah... Thanks for the help. I have to put the books back on
the shelf.
"I'll help you with that. My work has just settled down."
I picked up some of the piled-up books. Even a few books

were quite heavy. I thought it was too much work for one girl
to handle.
It's hard to check the shelf number on the spine of a book

when you're holding it. As I put the books down, I checked
the location of each book and put it back on the shelf.
...The last book was on the art shelf.
I wondered where the shelf for art books was. As I

walked along, checking the plate on the bookshelf, I found
the shelf I was looking for near the back seat where I had
been sitting earlier.
There was Fujisaki in front of the shelf.
Apparently, Fujisaki was also trying to put back the books

there. She stood on her tiptoes and stretched her body hard,
trying to get it to the top. However, she could barely reach it.
The bottom of the book was scraped repeatedly.
Don't push yourself.
I put down the book I was holding and walked closer to

Fujisaki.
That's when it happened.
"Eh?"
Fujisaki's balance was thrown backward. She took a few

steps backward but still couldn't seem to regain her balance.
She was about to fall on the table behind her.
—Watch out!
I hurriedly pulled Fujisaki's arm.
Just before she collided with the table, I was able to pull
her to the front.
Her head hit me in the chest with a thud.
"......Ah!"
I naturally pulled her into a hug. I could hear her
breathing.
"S-Sorry..."
I let go of her body in a panic, but I couldn't hide my

agitation. Fujisaki immediately apologized to me who was
freaking out.
"I'm sorry too!"
Well, whatever it was, I was glad that Fujisaki was not

injured. I'm not sure if she was embarrassed by her mistake,
but her face was a little red.
"You should have just used a step stool..."
"Was there a step stool?"
"There it is..."
Sure enough, there was one in the corner. It's a wooden

two-tiered one.
"The bookshelf is pretty high. You shouldn't push yourself

too hard."
"Yeah, I guess so. Thank you so much."
We couldn't look at each other, and I felt awkward.
"I'll put the rest of the books away for you. It's probably
not a good idea to leave the counter empty."
"Ah, I see! That's right. Um, yeah. I'll leave it to you."
"Oohh."
After handing me the book, Fujisaki ran back to the
counter.
I made sure that Fujisaki was out of sight, then put my

hand on my chest. Fujisaki's head had been pressed against
my chest a moment ago.
I could clearly hear the thumping of my heart.
***
Being on the library committee once a week didn't bother

me at all.
Fujisaki is cute. I have no desire to go out with her, but

she is fun to talk to. She seems mature, but she sometimes
has funny reactions and never does anything that makes me
uncomfortable.
In fact, Fujisaki seemed to be very popular.
Fujisaki's name was often mentioned when the boys

would get together and talk about girls.
Even the guys who seemed to be "Riajuus" all said they

wanted to go out with her. She is not rough around the edges
and is kind and polite to everyone. I've never seen her say a
bad word about anyone. Her grades were excellent, and she
got near-perfect scores on every quiz.
Even Saito and Shindo, who had been so reluctant to join

the library committee, began to envy me.
"I never would have guessed that there was a cute girl in
another class and that there would be an option to hang out
with her once a week."
Saito told me this while we were playing a game in the
club room.
"So, You had an interest in three-dimensional girls."
"Well, if you're asking me if I'm interested or not, I'm not

saying I'm not."
"That's not exactly an answer..."
To be precise, it was a combination of being on the library

committee and a coincidence that the days of the week
happened to coincide. And that's just for the first half of the
year — until about September. If we were in the same class,
we would probably have more opportunities to get involved.
However, saying such things did not convince Saito and

Shindo. Before I knew it, they thought I was like a reserve
riajuu.
***
"What kind of place is the science club in which Ookusu-

kun is in?"
Fujisaki asked me one day while I was doing my job as a

member of the library committee. I was a bit at a loss for
words.
"What kind of place huh... well, it's an unusual kind of

club."
"I see. Who and all are in it?"
"Saito and Shindo from my class. From Fujisaki's class,

there's Yamaguchi and Sakakibara."
"Hmm, to be honest, I don't know much about them."
That's probably true. They are all inconspicuous people.

There is a weirdo named Senoo who is one year older than
me, but he is generally quiet.
"We don't do anything serious. We're usually just playing

around. There aren't too many restrictions, so it's easy."
"Ah, You did say at the beginning that any day of the week
would be fine, right"
There is no fixed day off in the science club. If you are in

an athletic club, you have at least one day off per week.
That's because that's the way the school rules are. Our high
school is not that enthusiastic about club activities, and we
are required to leave school around 6 pm.
"Fujisaki, are you in the badminton club?"
When I asked, Fujisaki replied, "Yes." and swept her

bangs to the side.
"I've been playing since elementary school, though I'm not

very strong."
"So it's like you've been taking lessons or something?"
"Yes, that's right. I asked my mom and dad to let me

learn."
I don't think many people start a lesson when they are

young and continue it in high school. That's why I felt that
she was so serious about it.
"Oh, but you know. Since I started playing badminton,

I've never been injured. I'm not athletic, but my body seems
to be strong."
"You seem like an Ojou-sama though."
(Note: Young lady from a wealthy house)
Fujisaki blinked at my words.
"Eh? Is that what you think of me?"
"Well. I feel like you were raised with a lot of care."
"Yeah, I guess so. Hmmm. I don't know myself."
"You don't happen to have any servants at home, do you?"
"No, we don't. I'm not an Ojou-sama, to begin with."
Fujisaki looked embarrassed. But I continued.
"By the way, how many floors is the house?"
"Eh? The house? Uh, well, it's a three-story house, I

guess."
"Hmm? Not an apartment?"
"Yeah... Independent house..."
My suspicion of her being an Ojou-sama was growing.
"Of course, an elevator doesn't come with the house, does

it?"
"Yes, it does... But we're not wealthy. Just ordinary."
Yes, Ojou-sama indeed. Even though she may not be at

the level you see in comic books or something, she is
definitely quite wealthy.
When I was in junior high school, there was another guy

who lived in a house with an elevator, but he was equally
adamant that he was not rich. Normally, independent
houses don't have elevators.
"Oh, by the way, how many cars do you have in your

house?"
"...3 cars. My dad collects cars as a hobby... Some of them

are old!"
"You don't have any foreign cars in there, do you?"
"...There are. Well, my dad spends too much money on

cars, and my mom complains about it a lot."
"You didn't go to private elementary school or

kindergarten, did you?"
"M-mou! You don't have to ask so many questions!

...That's correct though."
That makes sense. She has been raised with great care,
which is why she is so pure. Our high school is also a very
advanced school, so it's not surprising that there are
students like that in the mix.
"I've always had the image that people, who took entrance
exams when they entered kindergarten, take the escalator to
the end."
I only know it from the drama world. The mothers who go

like, "Oh ho ho." in real life would say, "Nowadays, you have
to get into a good school from kindergarten." and send you
to a cram school and even have you practice for an interview
to get accepted.
"Of course, there are schools like that, but ours ended at
elementary school. And since the entrance exam for junior
high school didn't go so well, I took the entrance exam for
high school as well."
"I see, at your age, you've taken the entrance exam three
times."
"...4 times, though."
(Note: Kindergarten, Elementary, Junior high school,

High school.)
"Oh, even in elementary school. That's amazing."
The more I talked to her, the more I realized that she was
rich. I guess my intuition was right.
"Oh, don't look at me like that. We're not really rich,

okay?"
"Uh-huh."
"You don't believe me at all."
"By the way, until recently, have you been calling your
parents Papa and Mama?"
Fujisaki curled her hands in her lap and turned her head
away. Her face was red and she was trembling.
"Oh, sorry. That's not true, is it... Fujisaki Ojou-sama?"
"Ookusu-kun!!"
It was cute to see Fujisaki screaming in distress. It may be
a privilege of the member of the library committee to be able
to see her like this.
...Needless to say, Noguchi-san scolded us for making too

much noise after this.
***
About a month after I started working as a library

committee member, there was a meeting of the library
committee.
After confirming that everyone had gathered, Noguchi-

san explained.
"I'm sorry to ask you to gather here during your lunch

break. Unfortunately, we're supposed to have this meeting
once a month. We'll be doing the same thing in the future, so
keep that in mind."
I was getting used to the ostentatious way she spoke. The

rest of the guys were a little taken back, but that was about
the extent of their reaction.
The guy in front of me, who looked like a riajuu, raised his
hand.
"Noguchi-san. It would be nice to know the schedule of

this kind of thing in advance if possible."
Noguchi-san nodded exaggeratedly, "Aa."
"Don't worry about that. This time it was rather spur-of-

the-moment, but I'll hand out the finalized schedule later.
Besides, we don't intend to have a long meeting. Well, I'll try
to keep it to no more than half an hour."
"Understood."
Noguchi-san, after confirming that things had quieted

down, looked over at us again.
"As I briefly explained before, this meeting is set up to

discuss matters that need to be decided as a whole. There
are three main topics. What to do with the newly purchased
books. How to update the layout. Sharing of recent
problems. If you give us your opinions, we'll make our own
decisions and give you instructions."
I listened to the talks while picking up my lunch. Fujisaki,

who was sitting next to me, did the same.
"The most intense thing we've done so far is the purchase

of books. The most passionate students insist on buying
some quite interesting books. As for the layout and
problems, I'll see what I can do. Sometimes it's over in an
instant."
Well, we won't be changing the layout that often, will we?

It's a lot of hard work to move the books around, and it's
doubtful that we'll see much benefit from doing so. The
trouble would not be so great if we did it normally.
The same boy as before raised his hand again.
"Is it okay to buy anything new? Even manga?"
I'm certainly curious about that. At the moment, however,

there is only biographical manga in the library.
"To tell the truth, there are no restrictions on that.

However, we have to get the principal's approval before
placing an order, but we often get turned down. In the end,
we can only purchase serious books."
"Oh, really?"
I've heard that in some schools, there are books such as

light novels and shonen manga, but it seems to be difficult to
buy them in our school.
"But if you can convince the principal, it might be

possible, as long as it's within the budget you've been given."
I thought it was probably because there were no students

who were willing to go that far before now, so there was no
such thing in place.
Noguchi-san continued.
"Let's get back to the point. I'd like to get into the specifics
now. First, let's talk about the new books. Is there anything
you want to buy?"
But no hands went up. I guess no one had thought of that.
"I'll ask you the same question next month, so please

think about what kind of books you want. I'll do my best to
fulfill your wishes. And then—"
There were no comments on the layout changes or

problems.
"Good. I see that there are no problems at the moment. If

there is anything you feel uncomfortable discussing here,
please consult with me individually. Basically, I'm always
available for consultation."
The meeting dissolved without further discussion.
It didn't turn out to be a fruitful conversation. As I was

thinking that, Fujisaki next to me started to talk to me.
"Ookusu-kun."
"Hmm? What's wrong?"
I could have stayed here and eaten, but I was just about to
put away my lunch box to meet Saito and the others.
"Hey, have you ever thought about what kind of book you
want?"
"Hmmm, I haven't really thought about it at the moment.

What about you, Fujisaki?"
"Me too. I remember saying something like that on the

first day as well."
To be honest, I couldn't remember it. Even if I did

remember, it would be indelicate to ask if there was a book
she wanted so badly that she would explain it to me.
"But since we're here, I'd like to make a suggestion for a

book. It would be kind of cool to have a book I've picked on
in the library that will stay there after we graduate."
"Yes! That's why I wanted to think about it a little more

seriously."
"I guess it's faster to actually look at a book. Maybe I'll

look for it in a bookstore next time."
"Oh. I was thinking the same thing."
Fujisaki and I looked at each other and laughed. When it

comes to this kind of talk, I know what I need to say
afterward.
"Well, why don't we go... together?"
Fujisaki nodded immediately at my words.
"Yeah, let's do that."
After that, we exchanged our line IDs. It was the first time
for me to have a girl as a contact on my line.
Moreover, isn't this a promise of a date? I wondered

something like that.
"I'll be in touch later."
Fujisaki said to me as I stood up with my lunch.
"Yeah. See you later."
"....See you."
...It's a secret that I was a little embarrassed.
***
On our day off, Fujisaki and I were at a bookstore.
The place where we gathered was a little more urban than

the area around our school. There was a famous chain of
bookstores there that stocked a wide range of books, from
technical books to mundane magazines.
Fujisaki and I were walking around, looking around in

awe.
"It's quite a challenge to check out all the corners again.

There are so many books, it's hard to find the right one. I
don't even know where to start looking."
It looks like it's a few dozen meters from one end to the
other.
"You're right... Hey, have you ever been here before?"
"I've been here a few times. I use it to buy reference books

and cookbooks. They have a better selection than other
stores, so I can choose carefully."
"I see. You cook, huh, Ookusu-kun."
"In this day and age, it's probably the fastest way to
lookup information on the Internet, but we don't have a
tablet or a printer, so books are the most convenient."
We walked through the bookshelves, talking about these

things.
I pretended like it was nothing, but I was nervous.
I met with a girl alone on her day off. It was a super hard
mode for me, as I had been mostly alone in junior high
school. Even so, I didn't feel weird about it, thanks to the
many conversations we had when I was on the library
committee.
Fujisaki looked cute in her casual clothes. She's wearing a

semi-long bustier-ish one-piece dress. The contrast of light
blue and white suited Fujisaki well.
I was too embarrassed to say such a thing.
"Oh, yes. There was something I wanted to ask you while I

was there."
Fujisaki spotted something and took off at a quick trot.
When I caught up with her, she was in the reference book

and problem book section. The selection of reference books
alone seemed to be about a hundred different kinds.
"Hey, what do you recommend, Ookusu-kun?"
"My recommendation? Why?"
"You said you always get perfect scores on quizzes, right?

I want to know what you usually choose to study. For
example, math."
"Are you bad at math?"
"It's not that I'm bad at it, but I'm not confident."
"I see..."
There are only two kinds of books I use. And I use them
only for supplementary purposes because the textbooks and
problem books specified by the school are generally
sufficient.
But if I had to choose one, it would be this one.
"'Comprehensive Mathematics: A Practical Guide'? That

sounds a little difficult."
"This book covers all the patterns you need to know for
each unit, so once you try it, you'll be surprised how much
you can solve."
"It's important to memorize the patterns of how to solve

math problems right... Then, I think I'll buy this one then."
"On the other hand, do you have any recommendations

for me? Especially English."
"English, huh? It's a famous one, but I think it's 'Afforest'.

Oh, that's it."
"Actually, I haven't bought one yet. I'll get one as well."
"It's famous and very easy to understand. I recommend

it."
That's how we both bought our own reference books. After

we put them in our bags, we talked about what to do.
"Maybe we can put the ones we bought in the library. It's

not very exciting, though."
"There might not be many people who come to the library

to borrow reference books."
"I'd like to put something up that looks interesting

though."
"Something that our school doesn't have, that we could

get permission for, that would be interesting..."
If it were easy to come up with, there would be no

hardship. First, I decided to look around from one end to the
other.
It was really huge. As far as the eye could see, books,

books, books. There were a lot of people standing around,
reading books here and there. The clerks themselves seemed
to be enthusiastic, and there were many corners with pops.
"Hey, for example, how about this one?"
What Fujisaki pointed to was a quiz book. It was not a

riddle book, but a trivia book. It seemed to be interesting
even at a glance.
"It's good, isn't it? If we say it's educational, it'll work for
approval."
"All the stuff in here seems to be similar."
"Recently, there's a TV show where they do a real quiz

game, so maybe that's the influence. There are so many
kinds. I'll write down all the publishers and titles so that we
can make suggestions."
I don't remember the quiz book being in the library. I'll

check later to see if it's there. But it's probably okay.
"Did our school have any kind of quiz club?"
"I don't think so. At least I've never heard of it."
If that was the case, it would be even less likely to happen.
At that moment, Fujisaki grinned, as if she had thought of

something.
"Hey, since we're here, can I ask you a question?"
"Oh, sure."
Fujisaki picked up a nearby book and flipped through the

pages, stopping halfway through.
"Question: What color is the sweat of a hippopotamus?

One, yellow; two, black; three, transparent; four, red."
"Red. I know this one."
"Oh, that's not fair! That's the correct answer..."
I picked up another quiz book, thinking that I should be

the one to ask the question next.
"Okay, here's my question. In which year did pandas first

come to Japan: 1, 1964, 2, 1972, 3, 1974, 4, 1980?"
"I don't know about that because it was before I was
born... But considering it was during the Tokyo Olympics,
one!"
"Too bad, it was 1972. That's when diplomatic relations

between Japan and China were restored."
"Ah, I see... I might have figured it out if I thought about

it."
"I guess that's one win for me."
"Geez! Don't make it a contest. You're making me wanna

win."
I hated to lose, and so did Fujisaki. We got heated as we

quizzed each other, and before we knew it, more than an
hour had passed.
But it was fun. I thought this kind of thing wasn't so bad

once in a while.
***
Even though we were in different classes, the girl I got

along with the most was Fujisaki.
There was no need to be self-conscious when talking to

her. When we passed each other in the hallway, we would
chat lightly. When the results of the midterm test came back,
we would talk about what was difficult.
Seeing how close we were, some people even suspected

that we were dating. Some of them blatantly asked me if I
was. I denied it every time, but there were times when they
didn't believe me.
I was happy with the relationship as it was. I couldn't see
myself ever going out with anybody. I thought I didn't
deserve it.
Then, one day, that happened.
***
"I heard that a guy named Ando from Class A confessed

his feelings to Fujisaki-san."
Saito was the one who told me the news. He's always
talking about two-dimensional stuff, but he's always keen on
this kind of stuff as well.
I replied, pretending to be as unconcerned as possible.
"I see. I didn't know that."
"Surprisingly, the reaction is weak..."
"Really? Well, something like that could happen with

Fujisaki, couldn't it?"
I've never talked to this Ando fellow before. But I knew

that he was the Ace of the tennis club. I don't know how he
and Fujisaki were getting along, but I had no reason to care.
"So, how did it go?"
Saito smirked at Shindo's question.
"He got rejected it seems."
"Of course he did. I mean, there's a boyfriend here."
"It's not like that... But that's surprising. I heard Ando is

popular with girls."
Ando and Fujisaki are very popular. I guess that's why the
story is spreading like this.
I don't know who spread the word, but I noticed that the
matter had become a well-known fact.
***
"I heard you know."
I mentioned this to Fujisaki on a day when I had to work

for the library committee.
Fujisaki looked around and—
"Yeah..."
She replied without energy.
It seems she doesn't want to talk about it much. Of course,

she doesn't. I'm sure she was asked a lot of questions by
others about it. Perhaps they even made her feel
uncomfortable.
Just as I was about to say 'Sorry, it was nothing.', Fujisaki

followed up and said.
"How much did you hear?"
I answered honestly. I know when, where, and even how

she said no. Apparently, Ando himself, who was rejected,
has been talking about it. He's not really trying to make
Fujisaki look bad. He's just being light-hearted about it, but
it must be very annoying for Fujisaki.
"...So it's spreading to the other classes that much, huh?"
"Probably through the tennis club. There are a lot of noisy
guys in our tennis club."
"I'm somewhat sorry about that..."
"No, why is Fujisaki apologizing? Fujisaki is more of a

victim."
He confessed to her, so she had no choice but to answer

him. There was nothing wrong with that.
"Actually, I went to an all-girls school until junior high

school. I didn't really know much about this kind of thing...
Does confessing or being confessed to normally become so
well known?"
I assured her that it does not.
"When you start going out with someone, people will

know because it's natural. If the confession fails, it's usually
kept between the two of the people involved."
"That's the case, right..."
Maybe she even got a few unpleasant looks.
For example, from the girls who like Ando. From their
point of view, Fujisaki might seem annoying. No matter
what they think in their hearts, they usually don't act on it.
However, with such large publicity, there might be at least
one person who does.
"Are you okay?"
I asked worriedly, but Fujisaki smiled and said it was

okay.
"I'm grateful that there was someone who said they liked
me. Besides, I'm sure everyone will forget about it someday."
"I guess so..."
But I could tell from Fujisaki's expression that something

had happened. But I had a feeling that she wouldn't tell me
even if I asked her.
I didn't talk about the confession anymore.
***
—A week later.
I witnessed it by accident.
Morning. When I arrived at the school gate, I saw

Fujisaki's back.
It was a little early, so few students had arrived as of yet. I

walked up to her to talk to her.
It was then.
Karan., a sound was heard.
Something rolled on the floor of the entrance. Fujisaki

picked it up from where it lay on the floor, still holding her
indoor shoes.
It looked like a pushpin.
I closed my mouth that I had opened to greet her

involuntarily.
After placing her indoor shoes on the floor, Fujisaki put

down her bag and took out a case of sorts from inside. She
opened the lid of the case and turned the shoes upside down.
There was a jarajara. sound.
I was shocked.
It was definitely a pushpin. Apparently, it was in her shoe.

And judging from Fujisaki's response, it was not just once or
twice.
After removing the pins, she checked to see if there were

any left and put on her shoes.
Then Fujisaki left without noticing me.
I couldn't chase after her. If I were in Fujisaki's position, I

wouldn't want her to see me like this.
—It's okay.
I thought back to Fujisaki's face when she said that.
I guess she was holding it all in by herself. I felt frustrated

that I hadn't been able to recognize it sooner.
I stood there for a while until the rest of the students

arrived at school.
***
Unlike the confession rumors, no stories were circulating

that Fujisaki was being subjected to harassment. The
harassment was not something that could be made public.
Or perhaps Fujisaki herself kept it a secret.
Fujisaki's spirits were waning by the day.
"Hey, Fujisaki. That's not the right place for that book."
"Eh? Oh, that's true... Sorry."
The smile that she could barely make was painful. There
were dark circles around her eyes. Her voice was also getting
quieter.
"...The book you put on is upside down."
"Upside down... Ah..."
I fixed it before Fujisaki did. At that moment, the book in

Fujisaki's arms fell and made a noise.
"That book is quite heavy, so it's dangerous. I'll hold it for

you."
"It's okay, you know...?"
"I'm saying that because it's not okay at all. Give me

everything you've got, too."
"Yeah..."
Her eyes were vacant. Even Noguchi-san was worried that

she should go to the infirmary. She seemed to be acting
stoutly while in the classroom, but when she was on the
library committee, she was quiet, as if she was distracted.
"Fujisaki. You'd better go home now. I'll do the rest."
"...Oh, no, I'll feel bad about it..."
"There's nothing to feel bad about. If you don't want to go

home, you can sit in the chair and rest. There's no one here
right now, and I can handle this on my own."
"Okay..."
Fujisaki retreated to the back of the room. After putting
all the remaining books back on the shelves, I moved to the
counter. There didn't seem to be anyone in particular there,
so I went to check on Fujisaki.
Fujisaki was slumped over with her face on the table. Her
hair was spreading out in a radial pattern.
...It had been almost three weeks since Fujisaki had been
confessed to.
The reason for this was obvious. It was because the

harassment against Fujisaki had been going on for a long
time.
I was worried about her and had been keeping an eye on

Fujisaki's movements ever since I saw that pushpin. As far
as I knew, there had already been five similar incidents. Not
only did they put thumbtacks in her shoes, but they also hid
her textbooks, messed up her notebooks, and stuffed her bag
with trash. It was simple harassment, but it was done
occasionally.
But I still don't know who did it.
—I will not forgive them.
I wanted to ask them what Fujisaki had done. She's a good

girl, isn't she? I'm sure she hasn't done anything that would
make others dislike her.
I sat down in the seat next to her and called out to her.
"...Isn't it okay to not push yourself?"
Fujisaki doesn't know that I know about the harassment. I

was waiting for her to tell me herself.
Fujisaki sat up and touched her bangs.
"I'm sorry I showed you a weird part of me. I'm not

pushing myself... yeah."
"Is that so?"
"...It's raining hard."
"It's the rainy season after all. It'll last for a few more
weeks."
A large number of raindrops were streaming down the

window. Most of the sports clubs were canceled. Only a few
people come to the library in this weather, wanting to go
home as soon as possible.
"Are you feeling sick? I'm sorry if it's not something I'm
supposed to ask you..."
"No, it's not like that..."
"You've been pretty down lately. Did something happen?"
"......Nothing."
"......It was after that confession, right? That's how it

seemed."
"......"
"Are you sure nothing is going on...?"
Fujisaki did not answer. Probably, she is afraid of

bothering others by discussing her problems with them. She
also doesn't seem to let people know that she's being
harassed.
Still, I was sure that it would be difficult for me to make a
move without having Fujisaki directly consult with me.
There must be a lot of harassment she received without my
knowledge. Some of them might even lead to clues about the
culprit.
"...Sorry."
That was the final word that came out of her mouth.
"......Okay. I'm on Fujisaki's side, so if you need anything,

feel free to rely on me."
"Yes, thank you."
Amid all the rain, I heard the sound of footsteps. I turned

around to see if it was a student who wanted to borrow a
book, but it was Noguchi-san.
Noguchi-san looked at Fujisaki and me.
"Both of you, go home."
I was surprised. There was still more than an hour until

closing time. If it was just Fujisaki, it's understandable. But
there was no reason for me to leave who's as usual.
"No, Fujisaki's the only one need to go home, and I will—"
"—It's okay. There are not many people coming here

anyway. Just me is enough. I won't be able to leave until the
end of the day anyway, so just leave this to me."
"But..."
"It's raining badly. I'm fine because I have a car. But

you're not, are you? In times like these, you have to take my
word for it."
She probably wouldn't approve of me staying, no matter

what I said. I gave up and just replied, "Okay." Fujisaki also
just said, "Sorry," and left her seat.
***
Fujisaki and I took our bags and headed for the entrance.
We took off our indoor shoes and put on our school shoes.
As I picked up my umbrella, which was left on the umbrella
stand, I noticed that Fujisaki had stopped.
"What's up...?"
The rain was getting heavier and heavier. The dirt outside
was a mess, and puddles were forming everywhere.
There were only four umbrellas left in the umbrella stand.

One of them must be Fujisaki's.
"...I remembered some errands. Do you mind leaving

first?"
"Errands?"
I had a hunch that she was hiding something. Then I took

a closer look at the umbrellas left behind and understood.
One of them, the red umbrella, was destroyed. The frame

was broken and the cloth was torn. That must have been
Fujisaki's umbrella.
Quite a busy fellow to go this far. If I was returning a little

later and I hadn't been here now, I wonder if she would have
been forced to walk in this downpour.
I clench my fist. Seeing Fujisaki's pained expression, I felt
a surge of anger.
"I'll be heading back soon. Don't worry about it."
"......Ha~h."
I had reached my limit. There was no way I could leave

Fujisaki like this.
I grabbed Fujisaki's arm as she tried to turn on her heel.
"...Get in my umbrella. Let's go home together." I said.
Fujisaki widened her eyes. Then she nodded her head as if

she thought it was best to follow my words.
The sound of rain. The slightly wet floor of the entrance

hall. The dull rumble of thunder made an eerie sound.
***
Walking in the pouring rain.
Two people under one umbrella. It was what is commonly

called a couple under the same umbrella, but the
atmosphere was not that romantic.
The atmosphere was dark and heavy. Not a word has been
spoken since earlier.
"......"
Fujisaki turned her face away from me.
One umbrella was not enough to cover us in this rain. We

were both wet on our shoulders, and our feet were slipping,
and our shoes were filled with water.
I was wondering what I should do.
I couldn't leave Fujisaki like that, so I forced her into the

umbrella, but I didn't think about what to do after that.
"Hey!"
I shouted a little louder, trying not to lose the sound of the

rain hitting the umbrella.
"You still don't feel like talking...?"
Fujisaki's eyes turned to me.
Her eyes were moist. I couldn't tell if it was from guilt for
keeping her mouth shut for so long, or if it was a plea for
help.
"...-e.... have...."
She was saying something, but unfortunately, I couldn't

hear her because of the rain. I pointed to my ear and asked
her to repeat what she said.
"How long have you known about it...?"
This time, I managed to hear her. I instantly understood

that the umbrella had been broken, and I didn't show any
sign of surprise. I guess that's why she came to that
conclusion.
"...From about two weeks ago. I saw Fujisaki removing

push pins from your indoor shoes at the entrance to the
school. I've been worried about it ever since."
"I see..."
When Fujisaki learned the truth, her next words were,
"I'm sorry."
I knew that the look in her eyes earlier had been due to
guilt.
"I'm sorry I bothered you after all. I thought it would end

sooner or later, so I put up with it. Because I figured that if I
was patient, it would all be over."
"The umbrella... after all..."
"Yes. That's my umbrella. I didn't think they'd go this far."
"Be that as it may, what were you going to do after I went

home?"
"That's..."
Perhaps she had not thought about it. Even though there
were few umbrellas left, other people might still need to use
them. Considering Fujisaki's personality, she would never
have taken it. At worst, she might have planned to run in the
rain.
"Do you have any idea who the culprit is?"
"No."
"The harassment itself started after the confession?"
"Yes."
So far, it was as I had expected.
Fujisaki is too kind. Even in a situation like this, she

doesn't force me to find out who the culprit is. I think she
was planning to let them do it until they felt better and wait
for things to calm down.
However, this is no longer the stage where we can leave

things to chance. We must find out who the culprit is and
take the appropriate measures to prevent them from doing
anything more.
That's how bad I felt about today's incident.
"This is the first time I've ever been in this situation."
Fujisaki's shoulders shook as she walked.
"I told you before. I was in a private school for girls for a
long time. There everyone was nice and there was no love
affair, so it was very peaceful. No one could be malicious
towards me like this."
"Yeah."
"That's why I was so surprised. The first time I was

harassed was when my pencil case went missing. I thought I
lost it myself, but then strange things started to happen, and
I gradually realized that it was something that someone had
done to me..."
"Yeah."
"That was... a little painful..."
It was the first time Fujisaki showed me her weakness. I

was relieved that she finally let out what she had been
keeping bottled up inside.
"Have you told the teachers?"
Fujisaki shook her head.
"Our teacher, you see. If I talked to him about it, he'd

probably make it a bigger story. I didn't want people to know
too much about it. I thought it would be over soon... I guess I
was being a little naive."
"You haven't told anyone yet?"
"No. Today, for the first time, Ookusu-kun found out

about it."
I wondered how she had been able to endure it all by

herself. I would never have been able to endure such
unreasonable treatment.
The culprit is just taking advantage of Fujisaki's kindness.

I don't know what the circumstances are, but they're letting
their own selfish feelings get the better of them. Taking
advantage of the fact that she didn't say anything to anyone,
they escalated the situation and repeatedly harassed her as
easily as breathing.
It's disgusting. It's nauseating.
I know. I know people who fall into this pattern of

thinking.
...I used to be like that myself.
"Let's catch the culprit."
I looked Fujisaki in the eye and said clearly.
"Unless we find the culprit and question them directly,

this harassment will not stop. I'm sure they'll get carried
away and continue to harass you. This is absolutely wrong.
We can't forgive it. This is not just Fujisaki's problem
anymore. It's my problem too."
I can't let Fujisaki take care of it alone anymore.
Fujisaki is an important friend. It is thanks to Fujisaki

that I have been able to enjoy my time since entering high
school. If Fujisaki is suffering, it's only natural that I reach
out to her.
"Ookusu-kun's problem...?"
"That's right, Fujisaki. I don't want to see you in pain

either."
I stopped. Fujisaki was looking at me in silence.
"Thank you..."
At that moment, I saw Fujisaki's smile for the first time in

a long time.
***
We left the main gate and walked down the hill.
The wind was getting stronger. If I were not careful, my

umbrella would turn inside out. I changed the position of my
umbrella according to the direction of the wind, but that
didn't keep the rain out and I ended up getting a little wet.
"It's kind of amazing right..."
I felt bad for Noguchi-san, but I was glad to get home

early. Judging by the clouds, it would not have subsided in a
few hours. In fact, there was a good chance that it would
have become even more intense.
"Yes."
Fujisaki held down the hem of her skirt.
The thunder rumbled again. The raindrops became even

heavier.
If it hadn't been for the umbrella, I don't know what

would have happened. I'm so glad I didn't leave Fujisaki like
that.
"......It's okay. I didn't see anything."
"Ookusu-kun..."
Staring eyes. It's true, I didn't see it. I could almost see it,
though.
The first thing I wanted to do was to get to a place where

we could relax, so I hurried on my way to the station. I
entered the station building, closed my umbrella, and
breathed a sigh of relief.
I ended up getting my hair and pants very wet. My feet

were a mess and I felt uncomfortable. I blamed it on a few
unavoidable puddles.
The person next to me, Fujisaki, was drenched as well.
Her bangs were stuck to her forehead. Fujisaki, standing

there with drops dripping down her face, looked more sexy
than usual.
"Do you want to buy an umbrella?"
Fujisaki replied, "Yeah."
We went into a convenience store in the station building.
While Fujisaki bought a plastic umbrella, I bought
something else. I handed it to Fujisaki as we left the
convenience store.
"Here."
Hot cocoa. I didn't know which one she liked, so I chose

one that seemed safe.
"Huh?"
"It's a little cold, isn't it? My treat."
"You sure?"
"I bought the same one. I can't drink it all by myself

anyway."
Fujisaki wrapped the can in both of her palms. The

warmth of the can must have soaked into her cold body.
Opening the pull tab, I drink it. It tasted sweet. Come to

think of it, it had been a long time since I drank cocoa. When
I buy something for myself, it's usually tea or a sports drink.
"Delicious..."
But it seemed that I had made the right choice. Fujisaki's

face was smiling.
The people in the station all seemed to be in a hurry.

Apparently, the train was running a little late. The
announcement that the train was running a little late due to
strong winds echoed throughout the area.
"Which direction do you go, Ookusu-kun?"
"I'm heading for Tokyo-side."
"Oh, I'm going in the other direction."
I continued to sip my cocoa. It was surprisingly hot and I

couldn't swallow it right away.
I wasn't sure how to initiate the talk.
Even though she told me a little, I wondered how much I

should ask.
Still, there was no time to hesitate. If I missed this

moment, I would probably have to wait until next week.
"Fujisaki, why don't you start from the beginning and tell
me everything?"
Fujisaki held the can in both hands and looked at me.
"The whole thing...?"
"About the harassment. You don't have to tell me what

you don't want to tell me. I told you we're going to catch
whoever did this. I just need a few leads to do that."
"...You mean like what and all happened?"
"Yeah. But that's not all. Tell me again what happened

when you were confessed to."
There's something that's been bugging me.
The harassment that had been going on for so long. The

fact that Fujisaki did not try to catch the culprit. I had a
feeling that it was not only Fujisaki's kindness that had left
them alone.
"Why...? It was just like the rumors are saying."
"Is it true? I think it was a lie."
Fujisaki's face flushed with surprise.
The story I'm hearing is simple. Ando called Fujisaki to

the school roof. There, he confessed to her. Fujisaki bowed
her head and said, "I'm sorry." Ando withdrew easily. That's
all.
It was too normal to be a story that needed to be told.

However, the rumor was not only about the fact that he was
rejected but also about the situation.
It was as if he wanted us to think it was an uneventful

confession...
"Fujisaki... In truth, weren't you probably a little scared?

So maybe you were trying not to do anything to provoke the
culprit."
I didn't have enough evidence to be sure. It was just a

trick. But the look on Fujisaki's face in front of me confirmed
that I was telling the truth.
"...You're amazing, Ookusu-kun."
The cocoa in my hand was empty before I knew it.
"So, it was a lie after all."
"...Yes."
After that, Fujisaki told me a lot of things. What happened

on the day he confessed to her and what kind of harassment
was going on after that.
My anger started to boil up.
What came to mind was the incident at the school

entrance earlier. Fujisaki tried to stay behind alone,
watching the rain pouring down, without asking for help
from anyone.
The situation now is no different from that time.
Fujisaki has not been saved yet. If I let her go, she would
probably just run straight into the rain, no matter how wet
she got. That's why I have to stop her. I have to save her.
"Just leave the rest to me, okay?" I said.
I threw the can of cocoa into the trash. When I turned

around, I saw a puzzled Fujisaki.
"What Fujisaki is worried about is that you might get

scared again, right? If I confront the culprit, you won't have
to worry about that. Am I right?"
"Yes, but..."
There was hesitation on Fujisaki's face. Whether it's okay

to involve me...
This is why I told her as confidently as I could.
"It's not a problem. I have an idea."
Even so, there was a moment of hesitation, and then

Fujisaki gave a small nod.
"Okay."
We've already gotten enough information.
The only thing left to do was to bring justice to the culprit
— Ando.
The culprit, Ando, is a member of the tennis club.
Our tennis club is not very strong. However, in our school

where we don't put much effort into club activities, it doesn't
really matter how strong we are. Just a guy with a good face,
who has the ability to talk and belongs to an athletic club, is
popular among girls.
He is a little dark-complexioned and of average height. He

has bright eyes and is more in the cute category. I often saw
him hanging out with the guys in the tennis club.
Of course, I didn't know him. I've never even talked to

him.
We were in different classes and different clubs. We

probably don't even have the same personal relationships.
—So, what to do?
This matter needs to be handled carefully. The most

important thing is to make sure that Fujisaki is not harmed
any further. If an effective measure is not taken, it will only
make the situation worse. If he found out that I had obtained
information from Fujisaki, it would only lead to another
scary situation for Fujisaki.
***
I was checking on Ando every step of the way.
Morning at school. Recess time. While moving

classrooms.
Somewhere along the way, Ando always made a move.
Ando's harassment of Fujisaki has continued. The
harassment must be carried out by Ando himself. If that is
the case, Ando will be alone at that time.
However, he doesn't show an opening right away.

Different classes have different class schedules, so it's
difficult to keep track of what's going on in other classes.
***
After school.
I didn't go home, nor did I go to the club activities, but

waited in the library for the tennis club to finish their
practice. Since I wasn't on duty today, I had nothing special
to do. I spread out my study materials, and as I move my
pen, my mind turns to the outside of the window.
The weather was sunny as if yesterday had been a lie. The

warm sun shone down on the entire ground.
Outside the window, various sports clubs were practicing.
The tennis club had about 60 students in three grades.

They occupied about half of the ground, shooting balls at
each other with rackets.
Ando was one of them.
To be honest, I don't really know how good the tennis

players are. There were rallies going on between him and his
opponents at a reasonable speed.
The way he was smiling so briskly, it was hard to believe

that he was the one harassing Fujisaki.
After about three hours, the tennis club practice was
finally over.
The time was six o'clock in the afternoon. A part of the sky
was turning red. The sun would be setting in about half an
hour.
I put away my study materials and left the library.
When I walked up the stairs and returned to my

classroom, there was no one there.
I put my bag down on my seat.
Those who were engaged in club activities were in the club

room, on the field, or in the gym. Those who were not doing
club activities had already gone home. So, unless there is
something significant going on, there is no need to be in the
classroom at this time of the day.
That's why when I heard footsteps in the hallway, I

thought, This is it.
I stood up and leaned against the wall on the hallway side.

There was no point in being seen here. I waited for the
footsteps to pass in front of the classroom before I looked
through the door window to see who it was.
It was Ando.
Ando was carrying a huge racket case on his back, drying

his sweat-soaked hair with a towel as he walked. He
immediately stepped into the classroom next door.
Carefully pulling the door shut so as not to make a sound,

I stepped out into the hallway.
I sneaked a peek at the classroom next door.
Ando was the only one in there. Looking around to make

sure no one else was in the room, he placed his racket case
on the table.
I move away from the door and decided to wait for a

while.
I could hear noises coming from the classroom besides

me. I had no idea what he was doing. It was an unpleasant
sound. As the harassment progressed, Fujisaki had began to
leave no personal items in the classroom. Her desk, for
example, should be empty.
I decided it was time to take a look inside through the

door window.
Ando was standing in front of Fujisaki's desk. His eyes

were cold as if the practice time's face had been a lie. In his
hand, he was holding a utility knife.
The gnashing sound echoed again.
In his other hand was a book. He was ripping the book on

Fujisaki's desk.
I wondered what the book was. I stared at the book

intently.
Then I realized.
It was a quiz book that Fujisaki and I had discussed and

decided to keep in the library. I could also remember my
date with Fujisaki at the bookstore.
—Damn.
...I was so angry.
I was disgusted by him, to begin with, but now I was even

more disgusted than before.
How did he know that this was the new book that Fujisaki
had proposed?
Ando continued to plunge the knife into the quiz book,

oblivious to my gaze. The paper was shredded into pieces.
The book, which had been one whole block, was slowly being
broken down into smaller parts.
—That's enough.
I opened the door as loudly as I could.
Ando's body shook with a start. It was too late for him to
hide. I walked up to him and asked,
"What are you doing?"
On Fujisaki's desk, a large number of pieces of paper that

he could not hide fell. I forcefully grabbed the ones that
Ando had hidden behind his back and dropped them on the
floor.
The quiz book was no longer in its original form. I picked

it up, suppressing my anger as much as possible.
Ando was looking at me with a frightened gaze.
"...Why are... you..."
He took a step or two backward. The book that Fujisaki

and I picked out crumbled in his hands as well. I wonder
what Fujisaki would think if she saw this. Fujisaki is a kind
person. Maybe she would feel sorry for me.
I put the book down on Fujisaki's desk.
In front of me, I saw a distorted face that was not typical

of a young man. There was even sweat on his forehead.
"Hey, say something, oi!"
Ando shouted in disarray, but I only returned his glare.
Ando must be wondering why I'm here. I'm not supposed

to be in this classroom. I'm from a different class. There was
no way I could have suddenly walked into the classroom
after school.
"....What is it?"
Ando's voice trembled as if he sensed my unsettling

atmosphere.
The sunset lingered outside the window. The reddish-

orange light flickered in the corner of my eyes.
I tried to take a deep breath.
The beating of my heart. The bright red color spreads in

my brain. My vision appears to be bent and jumbled.
I couldn't stop the anger.
You shouldn't show too much emotion. My heart advised

me.
The old me from when I was a delinquent was about to

jump out at him. The me that used to follow my emotions
and do whatever I wanted without knowing that it would
cause trouble to others was about to resurface. That's no
good. That's why I failed in the past. I thought I had decided
to stay quiet after entering high school. Despite this thought,
my other self spoke to me.
I should never forgive this guy in front of me. He is the

source of Fujisaki's pain. If I don't punish him, even if it
means warping my resolve or resorting to violence, there is
always the possibility that he will harm Fujisaki again.
Once I surrender myself to this anger, I would forget

everything about the past, and even if I had to throw
everything away, I would harden my fists, and I would beat
up this ugly man as if he was a different person than when
he was playing tennis. And I would beat him up so one-
sidedly that it couldn't even be called a fight, and I would
crush his heart so that he would never feel like doing
anything again—
I thought about it for a while, and then it hit me.
The flicker in my vision subsided. The red color that had

been dominating my brain receded.
I'm okay. I'm fine. My emotions subsided as if they had

never happened before.
"...What was the purpose of this?"
I asked that question extremely calmly. Ando probably

hasn't noticed any change in me.
"......"
"You may think you've been hiding it, but I know all about
it. I've seen you harassing her like this a few times."
This was a lie. I knew better than to tell them what
Fujisaki had told me.
"Naturally, I took pictures of some of them. You know, I

can expose as much of this stuff as I want if I wanted to."
It was all a lie, but in this state, he would have to believe

it. Ando's face became more and more distorted.
"......Why......?"
His voice was trembling.
"... Why was I exposed.... Don't mess with me... Damn...

Damn... Damn...!"
I took a step forward. That was all I did, and Ando

overreacted.
"Stop, stop it, I'll do anything, okay? Don't say a word

about this to anyone."
"......"
Even without violence, I can deal with these small fries in

any way I want.
"Answer the question. Why did you do this?" I asked.
Ando looked away awkwardly. He seemed to be

wondering whether he should say it or not. Or maybe he was
trying to make up a reason to lie about it.
I decided to tell him what I thought, as I felt that I was

getting nowhere.
"You wanted her to keep quiet about the day you
confessed... didn't you?"
He got wide-eyed. I knew I had hit the nail on the head.
I continued.
"There was a guy who happened to be watching where

Fujisaki was being confessed to, you see. Because he thought
nobody would believe him, he didn't tell anyone. But still, he
told me. At first, it was a normal confession, only to be
rejected. Up to that point, it was just as the rumors say."
This is what Fujisaki told me. From the moment I heard

the contents, I had some idea of the motive.
"But then came the problem. You were upset that you
were rejected, and asked her sharply, 'Why?'. When Fujisaki
replied, 'Because I don't like you', you became even more
upset, and this time you grabbed her arm and shouted
something incomprehensible like 'That's strange'. You tried
to force yourself on her by telling her how good and
attractive you are...."
"Stop it!"
Ando is breathing hard. This is where it all began. It

makes sense that Fujisaki was not in good spirits after his
confession.
"You regretted it, didn't you? Up until then, you've been

passing yourself off as a fresh, good-looking guy, but you
were so surprised to be rejected that you revealed your shitty
nature. So you figured you had to somehow keep her from
talking about it."
"Shut up..."
"You knew that she would realize that you were the one
harassing her. You were harassing Fujisaki to keep her in
check. Maybe you even told Fujisaki the first time you
harassed her something like 'You know what would happen
if you speak to anyone about it'."
"Shut your mouth!"
He didn't like being called out on it. But it didn't matter.
"Actually, you are a scumbag, right? I wonder what the

other guys would think once they realize it. I don't know
what kind of lies you've been feeding them, but I'm sure
even the tennis team would be shocked."
He was aware of this, and that's why he was trying so hard

to hide it.
"You might get bullied, you know. The girls will hate you
so much, you might not be able to get a girlfriend in high
school. No one will take you seriously at the tennis club, and
you might have to drop out. If you're such a jerk, it's no
wonder either."
I grabbed Ando by the collar and pulled him closer. Then I

said,
"—If you want me to keep quiet about this, don't ever dare
to harass Fujisaki again. If you continue to do so, I will not
be responsible for what is gonna happen to you."
Ando, cornered against the wall, nodded his head, his

body trembling. Tears were welling up in his eyes.
"And I'll never forgive you. Remember that."
As I took my hand away from his collar, Ando wobbled
back.
"...ha, haha..."
Then there was laughter. He must be so delirious.
Ando walked out of the classroom, leaving his racket case

behind.
The door slammed shut with a loud bang.
I let out a big breath.
—With this, it's fine.
It might be lenient. But I couldn't bring myself to do more

than that.
But then again, a scum like him would probably run

himself ragged shortly.
I looked back.
The classroom was silent as if it had never been quiet

before. The air was so calm that it was hard to believe that
some gruesome harassment had been going on. There was a
broken book near Fujisaki's desk, but other than that, it was
just a normal classroom.
I returned to the vicinity of Fujisaki's desk and picked up

the scattered pieces of paper.
I wanted to hide that the book had been torn to pieces,

though she might find out about it sooner or later. I just
want to tell Fujisaki the result that it was solved.
I gathered up most of the pieces of paper and walked to
the front of the classroom to throw them in the trash.
Clang!
I heard a sound.
—Eh?
I froze, holding the piece of paper in my hand.
At the door on the opposite side of the room from where

Ando had left.
There was Fujisaki. She turned her body toward me with

her head down.
"......"
Fujisaki was silent.
The light from the window cast long shadows on her feet,
and Fujisaki's expression was obscured by her hair.
However, I could immediately tell that her mood was
different from usual.
I was getting impatient.
Why is she here? Did she anticipate his actions and head
for the classroom as soon as the club activities were over,
just like me? Otherwise, there would be no reason to come
here.
Besides, Fujisaki's behavior was strange. Normally, she

wouldn't be so quiet.
—Don't tell me, had she been listening to us the whole
time?
Just as that thought crossed my mind, Fujisaki's mouth

opened.
A small voice. If I didn't concentrate, I might have missed

it.
"What's wrong?"
I acted as if nothing had happened. She might have just

arrived here a few minutes ago. As much as possible, I don't
want Fujisaki to see what was on her desk.
"Ookusu-kun... That..."
"How long have you been there, Fujisaki...?"
"...From when Ando-kun was approached by Ookusu-

kun."
My bad premonition was right on the money. If she had

heard about it from the beginning, it would mean that
everything I had tried to hide was now exposed.
"I see..."
I opened my palm. There was a piece of the quiz book that

I had just collected. Fujisaki also seemed to know what was
there, and apologetically lowered her eyes.
"I'm sorry. It was my fault that things turned out the way
they did."
"Don't make me say it again. It's not Fujisaki's fault. It's

all because of this guy Ando. But I don't think he'll harass
you anymore."
What's done is done. It's also possible to talk to Noguchi-

san about the situation and ask her to buy it again.
"I didn't want to show too much to Fujisaki. Did I show

him a bit too much leniency?"
Fujisaki shook her head.
"You might have seen him, but he ran off. He left his
racket there, shall we mess around with it?"
She was still shaking her head.
"I see. Well, let's just get this over with and get out of
here."
"...Yeah."
I threw away the piece of paper in my hand and went back

to Fujisaki's desk. There is a tattered book haphazardly
placed there. I couldn't just throw it away, so I decided to
put it in a plastic bag. I'll take care of it at home.
In the meantime, Fujisaki was standing by my side,

watching me. She hadn't said much since a while ago. I guess
she was so apologetic that she couldn't even speak.
As I got my bag back on my back, Fujisaki grabbed my

blazer. Looking at her hands again, I realized that they were
very small. If I wanted to shake it off, I could, but I couldn't,
so I stood there.
"...what's up?" I asked.
I thought maybe there was something she wanted to say.
But she couldn't say it out loud. I decided to wait patiently.
Eventually, Fujisaki said—
"Thank you."
Her voice was muffled and hoarse.
"I didn't do anything to deserve your thanks."
"You did. I don't think I could have done it if I had been

alone. You've helped me a lot."
"That's the point. I'm also always indebted to Fujisaki. It's

normal for me to help out a little."
"...Weren't you scared?"
"...No, I wasn't. Since it was man to man, there was no

need to be so afraid."
If I had to say, the only thing I was afraid of was that I

would go berserk again. I was really glad that I didn't show
that in front of Fujisaki.
"Are you okay...?"
"Not really, I guess."
Fujisaki hadn't made eye contact with me since a while

ago. I don't know if it was the setting sun or not that made
Fujisaki's face look a little flushed.
"...Fujisaki?"
Fujisaki, who kept looking away, seemed to be somewhat

nervous. I didn't know what to do, so I couldn't move.
Fujisaki said quietly.
"You know, Ookusu-kun..."
"Hm?"
"You see..."
She was trying to say something, but she couldn't get the
words to go beyond that. I could tell that she was trying to
say something important. I didn't know exactly what it was,
though.
I wondered how long it had been. Without saying a word,

Fujisaki took her hand away from the hem of my blazer.
Then she stepped back and looked up.
The expression on her face had already returned to her

usual Fujisaki self.
"...What's wrong?"
"...No, it's nothing."
"Hmm. Okay."
Fujisaki smiled shyly.
Fujisaki and I got back into our usual groove and walked
home, talking about trivial things as usual.
The thought of Ando and the harassment had already

disappeared from our minds.
Fujisaki smiled happily. I felt a sense of relief as I laughed

with her.
At last, the hardship was over and I could go back to my
normal life.
That was enough, I thought.
Chapter 04: Persuading Mother Enami
"Ah."
"Ah..."
Fujisaki and I choked on our words as soon as we saw

each other.
Inside the classroom in the morning. The sun was shining

gently through the window. I opened the door and walked
in, and immediately bumped into Fujisaki.
It was Monday, after a weekend since I had treated

Fujisaki to curry. Feeling the awkwardness in the air, I
barely managed to speak.
"Good morning..."
"Good morning..."
I couldn't make eye contact. I also couldn't say another

word.
On the way back that day... While escorting her, Fujisaki

told me many things. It was almost like a confession. Even
though I was aware of Fujisaki's feelings, in a situation like
that, I had to give a firm reply.
But there was nothing I could do.
I could only stand there until Fujisaki left me.
I was being a slacker. Still, I knew I couldn't give her a

half-hearted reply. That's why we parted ways and ended up
meeting today.
"..."
I could only remain silent, but I couldn't just walk away. If

you let an awkward moment end awkwardly, it will become
even more awkward afterward.
Just as I was about to say something, the silence was

broken by the presence of a third person.
"——Good morning! Naochi, Shio-chan!"
Nishikawa spoke to us in high spirits from early in the

morning. I felt relieved. Fujisaki and I both relaxed our
expressions as if the previous moment had been a lie.
"Good morning Nishikawa."
"Good morning Nishikawa-san."
Nishikawa was smiling but eventually tilted her head as

she looked at us.
"Why are you staring at each other so early in the

morning? Am I interrupting something?"
"No, no. Nothing like that. Right, Fujisaki?"
"That's right, Ookusu-kun."
"Hmm... something's fishy."
Feeling a sense of strangeness about our reaction,

Nishikawa left. She called out "Morning~!" to every single
classmate she found.
Fujisaki and I let out a small laugh.

"Nishikawa-san is really amazing."
"Yeah..."
Nishikawa possesses a great deal of communicative

power. Whenever Nishikawa talks to people, the place
becomes lively. I don't think there is a single person in this
class who has not talked to Nishikawa. Not only does she
talk to otaku like me, but she also talks to people who are
always alone.
"...That's right. I had something for Fujisaki."
"Eh?"
I took out a pair of glasses and a glasses case from my bag.

They had apparently been left on Sayaka's desk.
"Something you forgot."
"Ah, sorry... I didn't realize it until I got home..."
"Do you always have it on?"
"No. My eyesight isn't that bad, so I only wear it when I'm

studying."
I've never seen Fujisaki wearing glasses before.
"I've already told Sayaka-chan, but I don't think I can

watch over her study tomorrow. I'm supposed to go out to
dinner with my family."
"Ah, that's fine. Please do it when you have time."
"Since the teacher is absent today, there are no club

activities, I'll teach her some more."
"Thank you."
The time for the morning SHR was approaching. Fujisaki

and I went back to our respective seats.
I was relieved to be able to talk to her as usual. I had been

anxious before coming to school today. Even if I had to
answer at some point, I didn't want our relationship to
become awkward.
***
After school.
After telling Enami-san and company to go on ahead, I

headed to the library where Fujisaki and Sayaka were. I was
told that it would be difficult to go to a family restaurant
every day, so they would be in the library today.
"Huh? Why is my shitty brother here?"
Sayaka asked in a hushed voice, noticing my arrival.
"I should help at least once in a while. I also feel sorry that
I'm always giving trouble to Fujisaki."
"...Is it okay with that beautiful woman?"
"I told her I'd meet up with her later. I'll be out in an hour
or so."
Fujisaki, who was sitting next to Sayaka, was promptly

using the glasses I gave her today. She didn't seem to want to
be seen in her glasses too much, so she looked away.
"Uh, physics today huh.."
"I don't understand a few things again... It just doesn't
match my head..."
Fujisaki and I looked at the problem book. It was a spring

problem.
We both carefully explained how things are. If you only

try to remember the formulas and theories, you will
inevitably have a hard time keeping up. Textbooks often
leave out such parts, so I can understand why students have
a hard time.
"Hmm, I may or may not have figured it out."
The only way to get used to this is to solve the problems

over and over again and gradually get used to them.
There seemed to be other parts that she didn't

understand, and Fujisaki and I explained them to her.
This kind of time is not so bad. I was able to have a good

time, even though I was studying myself.
***
The hour flew by.
"Then, I should get going..."
I put away my study materials and got up from my seat,

but Sayaka glared at me.
"...I've asked this before, but what are you really doing?"
"I've told you before that it's not something you should
make a big deal out of."
"Hmm."
Sayaka looked unconvinced. But this was something that

couldn't be helped. I don't want to say, "I'm going to quit
after all." now.
Fujisaki gave me a small wave.
"See you."
I don't know how she feels about it inside. Leaving the girl
who confessed her feelings for me to go to another girl is not
an act that I would normally admire.
However, I decided to take advantage of Fujisaki's

kindness. I said, "Bye," and left the place.
***
As I entered Enami-san's house, I realized that little had

changed in the situation.
Inside the living room. Mother Enami was sitting there.

Nishikawa was collecting small trash as she did last week.
However, it seemed that they could not make any major
changes to the room and the broken furniture was left
behind.
"Hey, Naocchi! Glad you could make it!"
Nishikawa said in a volume of voice that did not irritate

Mother Enami.
Mother Enami in the back of the room also smiled at my

appearance. Knowing what happened last week, she doesn't
look welcoming to me. It seemed like a vague smile to
someone who was on guard.
"Ah, More of you have come. I'm glad Risa has many
friends."
"Ah, hi. How are you feeling?"
"I'm feeling much better now, thank you."
However, the all-important Enami-san was nowhere to be

found. Nishikawa, clad in the top and bottom sweaters,
making use of the reflection from last time, answered for me.
"Risa-chan? She's out for a little shopping right now. I'm

sure she'll be back soon."
There is no change in the situation, but the cleaning

seems to be progressing little by little. The amount of
garbage in the living room was definitely decreasing. The
smell was also getting weaker.
A garbage bag was collected in the corner of the living

room. She didn't seem to have any intention of doing
anything about the trash, and Mother Enami hadn't touched
it at all. After all, what Mother Enami is afraid of is the
change in what serves as a part of the room.
Just as I put on my plastic gloves to collect the garbage,

Enami-san came back.
"Ah."
She noticed my presence and gave a small nod. The items

she had bought seemed to be jelly drinks and water. The
refrigerator is useless in this room, so she might have to buy
it more often.
Enami-san had changed into a jersey. I guess it's natural

that she should be dressed in something that she doesn't
mind getting dirty. Normally, this would be a tacky look, but
when Enami-san wears it, it looks good.
Her long, slender legs. Her slender body. She could have
appeared as a model.
She handed over the items she bought to Mother Enami.

And mother enami responded, saying, "Thank you".
As soon as she received it, she took out a bottle of water

from the plastic bag and drank it down in one gulp. Her
forehead was covered with sweat. Even in this cold space,
one might sweat when they're wrapped in a futon.
"If there's anything you want, let me know right away. I'll
get you later."
"Oh, that's so sweet. Are you just trying to look good

because of having a boy over?"
"Mom... That's not true."
"I'm kidding. Scary~"
For some reason, Enami-san glared at me. Did I do

something wrong? No one is taking it seriously, so there's
nothing to worry about.
The three of us resumed our cleaning. No matter how

much trash we collect, there's still more. It looks like we're
going to end up just cleaning today.
The trash near the TV was already almost gone. There

hadn't been much garbage around here, to begin with. The
pieces of dishes left on the carpet had all been collected.
They were probably removed by sticking them with duct
tape purchased at Home Depot.
The area around the dining table was still untouched.
Tissue paper lying on the floor and food stuck to the table. I
carefully wiped each of them away.
"......"
We worked in silence. Enami-san and Nishikawa were

quiet. Mother Enami was also quiet.
The image of Mother Enami from last week still lingered

in my mind. The devilish look she showed us as we carried
out the furniture.
"——Can't you listen to what I'm saying?"
The tone of her voice was uncompromising. She looked at

us as if she wanted to shoot us. We must not make the same
mistake again.
As I carefully proceeded with my work, I suddenly heard a

rustling sound coming from nearby. The sound was coming
from near the kitchen. I looked up and strained my eyes to
see what it was.
Then I realized.
"Oh, Cockro—"
Before I could say anything else, Nishikawa raised his

voice.
"—Kyaa!? Ah, Ah, Ah, Ah... Co-Co-Co-Cock....!"
She had been quiet until a moment ago, but her face
turned pale and she backed away vigorously.
"No, I can't. No, no, not that thing. Someone get rid of it,
get rid of it, save me, save me please...!"
She was prattling. She seemed to be very uncomfortable

with it and screamed whenever the cockroach moved.
To be honest, I'm not very good with cockroaches either.

They come out occasionally in my house, but every time they
do, I have a hard time getting rid of them. I don't want to
touch them, so I use a spray to weaken them, then catch
them and let them go outside. They're so quick that it's hard
to spray them if you're too lazy to deal with them.
I let out a breath of air.
Calm down. There are only girls in this situation. I'll just
have to deal with it.
Just as I was about to confront the cockroach, Enami-san

walked past me.
—Eh?
There was no hesitation in Enami-san's steps. She headed

straight for the cockroach and slammed the empty box of
tissues in her hand as hard as she could.
""......""
It was an incredibly smooth series of actions. I was

speechless with surprise.
"......Yosh."
One-shot. The cockroach was now a sight for sore eyes.

Enami-san wiped the corpse of the cockroach with a rag and
returned as if nothing had happened.
Nishikawa and I were stunned. Maybe this kind of thing
happens all the time. It was too brilliantly handled.
Enami-san put the empty box of tissues, the corpse, and

the rag into a bag and closed the mouth of the bag. She then
looked at us suspiciously as we didn't resume cleaning.
—She's strong. I thought.
***
...Mother Enami was quiet today.
I'm sure she's not even looking at us in the first place. She
was wearing a mask of a smile on her face, looking out over
the entire living room. Our every move was as oblivious to
her as the flow of air, blending into her vision.
"Um..."
I was curious and called out to her. She was replacing the
heat cooling sheet.
"Ara? Um... your name was..."
She seemed to have forgotten the name that I had given

her once.
"It's Ookusu. Is your body okay? It's a little cold here..."
"Yeah? It feels like it, but it doesn't bother me."
To be frank, it's hard not to be bothered. We're wearing

warm clothes to clean this room, and it's still too cold for us.
If you have a fever, you should feel even colder.
"Your cold is not going away, isn't it? Are you taking any
medicine?"
"I don't really like medicine. Risa took me to the hospital

once, but I only took the medicine the first day. It worked for
me until now."
"But if it hasn't healed so far.."
"You're worried about me, aren't you? Thank you. I may

have a cold, but I'm not that sick. My throat doesn't hurt and
I'm just a little lightheaded."
Indeed, she didn't seem to be coughing or sniffling. Her

cheeks were flushed, but her lips were not blue.
"I heard from your daughter, Risa. She said the fever
hasn't gone down for more than a week."
Mother Enami gave a composed nod.
"That's true. As we get older, we tend to heal more slowly.

In the past, I would have been cured in a day."
She smiled. The smile on his face was very similar to the
one I had seen on Enami-san's face some time ago.
I think it's mostly the environment that makes it hard to

get rid of colds. The weather is cold, the hygiene is poor, and
Mother Enam is mentally unstable. To begin with, instead of
being cured, I feel that she might as well be wasting away
little by little.
Mother Enami sipped the water again. Her forehead was

covered with sweat again.
"Ookusu-kun, right?"
Mother Enami said after setting down the plastic bottle.
"Ah, yes."
"If you come here too much, you'll catch a cold someday."
"...Does that mean I shouldn't come here anymore?"
"I wouldn't go that far. But if you get a cold, it will only
make your family worry about you. My health is my family's
business. It's not your concern."
"...That's true."
I think Enami-san also worries about that.
"Risa has you pushed around a lot, hasn't she?"
"I can't deny that point..."
Enami-san is not a person who is willing to open up about

her thoughts and feelings in general. No one has ever been
able to reach the depths of her heart that have been hidden
behind the veil.
"Still, I'm the one who decided to help..."
"Risa's friends are kind, huh."
Behind me, the two of them were quietly cleaning. I'm

sure they could overhear our conversation while they were
cleaning.
"...What were you looking at earlier?"
"Eh?"
"While we were cleaning, I had the feeling that you were
vaguely looking at something..."
"...I don't quite follow what you mean."
Mother Enami's voice faltered a little. I felt like I

shouldn't pursue the matter too much, but I felt like it was
the only time I could ask.
"Today, you didn't fall asleep, and your eyes kept looking
this way."
"I wonder if that's the case. I am not so sure myself."
She refused to make eye contact with me.
"...After you've been doing that for, what, an hour?"
"Well..."
At that moment.
I felt the time inside Mother Enami stop. It was the same
as before, when Enami-san had angered her. As expected, it
would be impossible to pursue the matter any further. I gave
up.
"Well, I guess it happens."
Little by little, time advanced for Mother Enami. Her eyes,

which hadn't even blinked, slowly moved their lids.
"I suppose so."
She answered shortly as if to say that this conversation

was over.
I'm just a stranger. There is no need to pry any further
than necessary. But I felt that I had to find out what was
there to solve the problem at its root.
I cut the conversation short and went back to cleaning.
I silently collected the garbage. There was still a lot of

trash left. But thanks to my hard work today, the area
around the dining table is now much cleaner. Now all I need
to do is clean up the kitchen, and things should be better.
It will probably take me two or three more days to

complete the request. I didn't know if I would be able to
cook, but I was going to do everything I could.
When I looked up and checked on Mother Enami, she was

under the covers.
She was no longer looking at us. Maybe she was worrying

about what I had said.
There were more than ten bags of garbage piled up in the

corner of the living room today alone. By the time we finish
everything, the pile will probably be twice as big.
We decided to do the bare minimum of sorting and call it

a day.
***
The next day.
"Remember this part well, because I'm going to put it on

the next test. And—"
World history class. The young teacher continued to

explain in an unhurried manner.
It was past ten in the morning. Because the guy sitting
behind me made an early lunch, there was a faint smell of
food in the air. I think it was pork cutlet, as far as I could
catch a quick glimpse.
"The important thing about the humiliation of Canossa is

that the Pope was that powerful, far more powerful than the
Holy Roman Emperor. That's how it happened in the first
place—"
Even as I scribbled down the words carefully written on

the board in my notebook, I couldn't concentrate much on
the lesson.
The reason was simple.
The seat at the back of the class. There was no one there
with a unique presence.
Shiroyama-sensei informed the class that Enami-san was

absent. When asked to elaborate, it seemed that she had
caught a cold. I think she caught it from Mother Enami.
I felt like it had been a long time since I had been in a

classroom without Enami-san.
Since that day when she became serious, she hadn't been
late or absent even once. She never dozed off in class and
became a model student.
The number of students who talked to Enami-san

increased little by little. Since there was no change in her
true nature, they were eventually treated coldly, but her
attitude had softened compared to before.
—So, just as Mother Enami was not recovering from her

illness, it was also becoming easier for Enami-san to catch
a cold.
A feeling of worry began to grow inside me.
***
As I finished my lunch, Nishikawa spoke to me.
"Hey, Naocchi. About Risa-chan...".
I checked behind me, but Saito was out of his seat. There
was a little distance between me and Shindo, so if I
whispered, he wouldn't hear me.
"A common cold, huh."
"I was so surprised!"
Nishikawa may have been trying to keep her voice down,

but the volume of her voice was so loud that the students
nearby could hear her. I didn't want to be overheard, so I put
my index finger over my mouth. That was all Nishikawa
needed to know.
"Have you heard any news from Enami-san, Nishikawa?

At least I haven't received any."
"I haven't gotten any either. Risa-chan is not the type of

person who is always in touch with people."
"That's true."
What I was wondering about was how to clean the Enami

house. I didn't even know when Enami-san would return to
the class.
"What are you going to do?"
"Hmmm. As for me, I'm going to Risa-chan's house again
today..."
"Visiting the sick?"
"Well, the cleaning routine is there, and I'm worried about

Risa-chan as well. What about Naocchi?"
"If that's the case, I'll go with you."
I don't think it would be great for her to be sick alone with

her mother. No one can take care of her, and it might be
difficult for her to even rest.
"Ah, you're so kind, Naocchi."
"It's normal, isn't it? Naturally."
"Then, let's go together after school."
"Nishikawa, what's your club activity?"
"No, it's okay. I'm not very strong in it and I'm not very
dedicated either. What about you, Naocchi?"
"Same."
And that's how we decided to go visit her.
***
The apartment building where Enami-san lived was not

auto-locked, so we were able to get inside easily.
We reached the fifth floor and pressed the intercom in

front of the Enami family's apartment.
In our hands, we had sports drinks and snacks that we
bought at the convenience store. There was no answer, but
after a minute or so, we finally heard a voice.
"...Who is it?"
The voice was faint, but I recognized it immediately.

There was no camera, so she didn't realize who it was.
"Yaho~ Risa-chan! I'm here to visit you."
"...Hold on a second."
I heard footsteps, followed by the sound of a lock opening.

Enami-san peeked out from behind the door. She seemed to
have checked the door scope and confirmed my presence,
and didn't seem surprised when she saw me.
It seemed true that she had caught a cold.
Her eyes were glazed over and she was breathing hard
even through the mask. She was wearing a fever sheet on her
forehead, just like Mother Enami had done yesterday, and
she didn't even try to hide her unusually messy hair.
"...Looks like it's more serious than we thought."
Enami-san sighed at my words.
"It sucks. I'm probably in worse shape than my mom. I

mean, you shouldn't even get too close to me."
Apparently, she wasn't going to let us into her house. But

there was no way we were going to turn back now.
"Well, well, Risa-chan. We bought a lot of things, and

Naocchi said he was worried about Risa-chan, so..."
"What?"
Although I'm worried, it's not like I couldn't help visiting

or anything. Enami-san is also giving me a suspicious look.
"I'm fine, just go home."
"You know what, Risa-chan?"
Nishikawa exaggeratedly shook her head.
"Seriously. Risa-chan, you can't do anything by yourself.

That's the way it is. Don't you think you should just be
honest and let yourself be indulged here?"
"I can do it. I bought some food at the convenience store

and took some medicine that we have at home."
"Are you sure? Besides, this kind of thing is a matter of

feelings, isn't it? We've come all this way, so please be
considerate of our feelings."
"...Sycophants."
That's all Enami-san said and opened the door wide. I was
relieved that she had agreed to accept the persuasion.
Considering her personality, it was quite possible that we
would be turned away.
When Nishikawa and I entered Enami-san's apartment, I

noticed that there were more things in there than before. I
thought it wasn't because she had a cold, but because she
had brought some things with her from the living room.
For example, a music box. I remember seeing it once

when I was cleaning the house. It was an old model. The
switch was a little peeling, there was a slot for CD and
cassette tapes, and the LCD was distorted around the edges.
Perhaps it was something she had found in the living

room when she was cleaning and had moved it here. If it was
this big, Mother Enami would not notice it.
"Cough, Cough..."
Enami-san is quieter than usual. She pulled a cream-

colored cardigan over her shoulders and climbed into the
futon. She seemed to have a chill, and her body was
shivering a little.
"Risa-chan. You look even worse than I thought..."
"That's why I told you to go home."
According to Enami-san, it's not the flu. She said she went
to the hospital once to get a diagnosis.
"...Are the symptoms just cold and scratchy throat? Your

nose doesn't seem to be itching too much."
I asked, to which Enami-san replied in a rather tedious

manner.
"My whole body is feeling sluggish. I feel so tired that I

can barely even talk."
"How's your fever?"
"About 38.5 degrees. It will probably go away after a day

or two of sleep."
There were some empty bags left on the side of the futon.
She must have bought some rice balls or calorie mates at the
convenience store.
Thanks to the air conditioner, the temperature was better

than in the living room. It was enough to make me sweat if I
stayed under the covers here. Enami-san's face was already
drenched with sweat.
"Do you have an appetite?"
Nishikawa peered at Enami-san's face while she was lying

down.
"I bought a lot of things. Do you think you can eat any of
them?"
"...Nishikawa. I've already eaten, so I don't need it. I can't

bother to raise my body to put something in my mouth, and
brush my teeth afterward. Please understand."
"Well, then, I guess it can't be helped."
In the end, most of what we bought at the convenience

store was useless. I was prepared for that, so there was
nothing to worry about.
"Thank you for taking the trouble to visit me... But it's not
good if you catch my cold."
"Enami-san, It seems that you're feeling rather frail."
"What do you mean?"
She glared at me for a moment. Of course, I meant that

she wouldn't have said such an unusual remark under
normal circumstances.
"Pu~ pu~ You shouldn't make fun of a sick person no

matter how much you want to."
"...Cheeky..."
Enami-san pulls up the covers. I apologized to her in my

mind.
"You're not very honest either, Naochi~"
"It's not like that."
Nishikawa is grinning at me for some reason. Damn, I
shouldn't have said anything unnecessary.
There's not much we can do, so we decide to simply clean

up Enami-san's room. We threw the scattered trash into the
trash can and pulled the equipment we bought at Home
Depot up against the wall. We also replaced the heat-cooling
sheets that had lost most of their effectiveness.
Perhaps unable to sleep, Enami-san was breathing hard.
Nishikawa wiped the sweat off her face with a

handkerchief. Then she spoke softly to her.
"Aren't you pushing yourself too hard?"
Enami just glanced at her and didn't reply. She really

seemed to be too tired to talk.
Nishikawa continued.
"Risa-chan is not very good at being pampered by

others..."
It was quiet. There was hardly any noise except for our
voices.
What are they talking about from earlier? Not good at

being pampered? Forcing herself? I didn't think she was
referring only to Mother Enami.
"If you don't let me spoil you a little more, I might feel
lonely, you know~."
Still, Enami-san didn't answer. It was as if she was

rejecting the conversation, or accepting Nishikawa's words
completely.
It was a world of only Nishikawa and Enami-san. It wasn't
a fluke that she had been on good terms with the cold
Enami-san for so long. There is a history here that I don't
know about, a relationship that I don't know about.
"...I'll sleep."
That's all she said, and she closed her eyelids.
I thought it would be bad to look at her sleeping face too

much, so I got up. Thanks to the cleanup, the room had
returned to the same bleakness I had seen before. It was a
girl's room, but the space was so inorganic that it didn't
make me feel that way at all.
Suddenly, I noticed something.
It was on top of a waist-high cabinet. There was a fallen

photo frame. I hadn't seen this before, so it must have come
from the living room.
I lifted up the photo frame.
There was a picture of the family, looking like they were

getting along well.
It was probably a picture of the Enami family from the

past. There was also a picture of Enami-san as a junior high
school student. I tried to put it back, thinking I shouldn't
look at it too much, but strangely my gaze never left the
picture.
There were four people in the family.
Mother Enami, Enami-san, and then there was a little boy

and a tall man with glasses who smiled serenely.
If this were a family photo, I'm sure it would be her
younger brother and father.
The photo was filled with an aura of happiness that was

unthinkable from the current situation.
The place was somewhere in Europe. In a street made of

stone, they were smiling at the camera lens as they huddled
together. Enami-san was no exception to this. Her smile was
so innocent that it was hard to imagine it from the current
Enami-san.
—What had happened?
Right now, there is no younger brother or father in this

house. There is only the mentally ill mother and Enami-san
with a cold expression on her face.
"I don't really know what 'important' means. It changes

from time to time. Things that were once important to us
become less so when the circumstances change."
Circumstances change. It becomes less important.
What were those words really referring to?
"...Naochi?"
"Ah, no..."
When Nishikawa called out to me, I hurriedly put the

photo frame on the cabinet. If Enami-san saw me doing this,
she would be furious and tell me not to look at it without
permission.
"It's nothing. Did Enami-san fall asleep already?"
"Probably..."
There, I saw Enami-san's sleeping face with her breathing

calmed down. She wasn't paying attention to our voices, her
eyelids were closed and her chest was rising and falling.
I've never seen Enami-san so defenseless before.
Showing her weakness is not like Enami-san. However, it

is typical of Enami-san to do what she wants without caring
about our presence. In any case, I still know too little about
her.
It's been less than two months since we started talking. All
I know about her is that she is a strong-willed person who
doesn't get along well with others. I wondered if there was
actually a completely different side to her. Fujisaki once told
me that she saw Enami-san at the shopping mall. She
appeared briskly when a little boy was crying and helped
him with a gentle smile.
I'm beginning to believe that it must not be a

misunderstanding or a whim, but a part of Enami-san's
essence.
"Nishikawa..., what did you mean when you said that?"
"Huh?"
"That she's straining herself, and that she's carrying it all

on her own..."
"Ah, yeah."
She seemed uncomfortable. Maybe she's not sure if she

can talk to me without Enami-san's permission.
"If you don't want to tell me, that's fine..."
"...You won't tell anyone?"
"Of course not."
I'm not so daredevil as to tell anyone about it. If Enami-

san finds out about it later, I'm sure she's going to be very
angry.
Nishikawa spoke in a quiet voice.
"Risa-chan has been working a lot on part-time jobs."
"Part-time job? I thought our school didn't allow part-

time jobs."
She nodded.
I understood why she didn't want me to tell anyone. I'm

not sure what will happen if the teachers find out that
Enami-san is violating the school rules.
"I don't know much about it, but I heard that she works
for hours after school and even on her days off. I don't think
she's getting enough sleep."
"...I didn't know."
"I really don't know much more than that, though,

because she' s not the type to blabber on about herself. I bet
she's having a hard time."
"I see..."
I guess Nishikawa told me about this because she trusted

me. Or maybe it was because she judged that Enami-san
would not be that angry if she found out that she had told
me.
Maybe, I think.
I wonder if money is not the only reason she is working

part-time. This bleak room. It's my own private space, but it
doesn't have any sense of life. I could feel that it was a sign
that she didn't want to stay in this house too much.
That's why she tries to run errands outside the house and
not come home. It fits a little better when I think about it
that way.
"What should we do, Naochi?"
"Hmm..."
To put it frankly, our objective has already been fulfilled.

We were able to check on Enami-san, but there was nothing
more we could do. I felt that it would be a bad idea to
proceed with the cleaning without her, and there was
nothing we could do but leave.
"We'll wait a bit, and if she doesn't wake up, we'll go

home."
"Yeah, ok."
We can't forcefully wake Enami-san who is not feeling

well. We sat down on the floor beside her. It was typical of
Enami-san that there were no seats or cushions.
We were both silent for a while, but then Nishikawa said,
"Hey, hey. Naochi, are you acquainted with Ando~u?"
"Ando~u? Who's that?"
"It's Ando. Eh? You don't know him?"
Ando, Ando?. I searched my mind and finally

remembered. He was the one who harassed Fujisaki when I
was a freshman in high school. He hadn't done anything
noteworthy since then, and I had almost forgotten he
existed.
"I'm pretty sure there was a guy like that in the tennis
team, or maybe not..."
"Yeah, from the tennis team. I saw him the other day. He
was talking about Naochi."
"...It's probably nothing good anyway."
He must have been telling me to die or to just bugger off.
"...You know, Naochi, there's a rumor going around that

you're dating Risa-chan, right?"
"Unfortunately"
"He also saw you with me and Risa-chan recently. He was

ragging on Naochi like 'He's really a scumbag', and 'He's
trying to blackmail Enami into going out with him after he
messed around with Fujisaki.'"
"You know what? Don't bother telling me about that. Just

keep it to yourself, okay?"
"I don't know why Naochi has to be put through all that,
so I was wondering if something happened between you
two."
"What are you talking about? There's no way right. We've
never been in a club or class together."
"That's true."
But that guy still hasn't learned his lesson. I was

dumbfounded.
"But even though he says all that, he still tries to avoid

Naochi whenever he sees you. I don't really understand."
"Isn't it just your imagination?"
I haven't told anyone about what happened that day. If I

talk about it, I inevitably have to talk about Fujisaki's
harassment, which would make Fujisaki feel uncomfortable.
"Well, I'll be careful in the future. I'll try not to get

involved with him much."
After that, I talked with Nishikawa for a while, but there

was no sign of Enami-san waking up. In the end, we decided
to leave the Enami house.
***
"Ah."
"Oh."
I stopped in my tracks when I saw the person standing in

front of me. I was on my way home at dusk. The man stood
with his hands in his pockets on the bus roundabout, where
the shadows stretched long.
Yamazaki Hiroyoshi. He had eye-catching red hair and

was tall. He was staring up at the sky with a pensive look on
his face, but when he noticed my presence, he pushed the
cigarette he was smoking into the ashtray.
He threw away the cigarette butt and took one step

forward with his long legs.
"...It's been a while."
I hadn't seen Yamazaki since I asked him about the

delinquent who had tried to harm Sayaka. About a month
has passed since then.
"...Ah. How can you smoke in that outfit?"
"Hmm?"
He was wearing a school uniform, clearly recognizable as

a high school student. It would not be surprising if he was
arrested. The police station was on the other side of the train
station, but there was a good chance that someone would see
him.
"Haha, no problem. Just smoke with a frown on your face

and no one will come near you."
"I guess that's the advantage of a scary face. Well, with

your red hair, they won't think you're a normal high school
student."
"That's what I mean. They probably think I'm a

cosplayer."
Even now, I remember that he used to hang out with

other delinquents. Today, however, Yamazaki was all alone.
He had a small cut on the edge of his lip, probably because
he still spent his days fighting. Standing side by side, I was
overwhelmed by how tall he was.
"Want some?"
Yamazaki pulls out an unfamiliar snack from his pocket.

It looked like a triangular pyramid-shaped gummy bear. I
somehow accepted it, opened the plastic, and threw it in my
mouth. It tasted sweet and tart. To be honest, I didn't really
like it. He immediately clicks his tongue at me.
"...You're so quick to show your face, aren't you? Don't

worry, you don't' have to eat it again."
"Sorry."
It is true that Yamazaki has always had a sweet tooth.
"I had a chance to go away for a while. I thought it was

rare, so I bought it."
Yamazaki put a piece in his mouth.
"Well, it doesn't look like something you can find in a

regular supermarket or convenience store."
"Right?"
Nostalgia lit up in the back of my mind.
This had happened to me when I was in junior high

school.
I might have been too uptight about Yamazaki. Not

hanging out with him doesn't mean not talking to him.
Yamazaki has always been a nice guy. I don't have any
problem talking to him like this when I run into him once in
a while.
"...Are those delinquents still the same?"
Laughing, Yamazaki replied.
"You're still a Siscon, aren't you? The problem has already

been solved. They're not going to get involved with you
anymore."
Shut up, man. I'm just asking."
I've never seen his face since. I've crushed his reason to be
obsessed with me, and I've given him a reason to stay away
from me. I am convinced that everything is fine now.
Yamazaki added another piece into his mouth.
"People don't change that easily. Those bastards are still

scared of me, and they enjoy bullying the weak. It's only a
matter of time before they're in the noose."
"Like the arcade?"
"Well, the arcade, yeah. I've heard that they also mug
people at school and hunt old men in the street. I'm just
saying, so I don't know how true it is."
"I see."
...Yamazaki hasn't changed much over the years, but there

are a few things that have changed.
The atmosphere is more relaxed than before. He was

never the type to run around energetically, but he had a
tendency to lose his temper. Now, however, he only clicks
his tongue.
"That scar has nothing to do with those guys, right?"
"Ah? Oh, this?"
I had been wondering about it for a while. The scar
around Yamazaki's mouth.
"Do you think I can get hurt by those guys? That's

impossible."
"Oh, yeah?"
"This is a completely different matter. It's not a serious

wound and you don't need to worry about it. What about
your wound?"
"My wound is almost healed. Well, there's still some

scarring."
There is still one bandage on it. Maybe it's time to take it

off.
"From the outside, it might look like I'm mugging you."
"Eh?"
I looked around and saw a figure looking at me with

concern. I indeed look like a nerd right now. It looks like I'm
being tangled up with a big guy.
When I looked at him, he walked away.
After all, Yamazaki stands out. That's why I'm standing

near him and attracting attention.
"Or maybe it's that. You're the class rep who persuades
the delinquents. We have different uniforms, so people
won't think we go to the same school though."
I don't know why, but Yamazaki seems to be in a good

mood. I don't think he's thinking that it's a good thing that
he hasn't talked to me in a while, but maybe he's enjoying
making fun of me.
"You're as bad as ever."
"Did you say something?"
"No."
I sighed. It was time to end the conversation and go

shopping. The refrigerator in my house must have been
almost out of stock. It would be better to go home early since
I've been behind in making dinner lately.
"I'm going to go now."
"Yeah. See you later."
Yamazaki walked past me. Even though he walks slowly,

he gives off a sense of intimidation to the people around
him. It had been a while since I had had a real conversation
with him, and I was enjoying it as well.
***
The next day, when I went to school, Saito called out to

me "Hey". As usual, he had an erotic novel in his hand.
According to what I heard, he was reading at the pace of one
book a day. I thought to myself, why doesn't he put some of
that effort into his studies?
"What?" I asked.
It was after morning SHR. There were about five minutes

left until the first-period class started.
"What's going on with you lately?"
"Eh?"
Before I knew it, Shindo had also raised his head and was
looking at me. I wanted to say that if there was anything
unusual, it would be you guys reading around like idiots, but
I didn't say it.
"I mean, you don't come to club activities much."
"Oh, you mean that? I've been going through some stuff."
In the first place, I thought that it was those two who

hadn't come to the club activities. However, when I listened
to him carefully, I heard that he has been showing up at the
club room recently.
Speaking of which, I can't finish cleaning Enami-san's

house like this. I didn't want to spend too much time on it
because it would be a burden on Fujisaki. Enami-san was
absent again today. From the way she looked yesterday, she
seemed to have a serious condition. She may not be able to
recover soon.
I wonder if Nishikawa is going to visit her again today. I

had a feeling that Nishikawa might, but I decided not to go
today. If I caught a cold myself, there would be no point.
"Stuff huh. I don't really know, but the president was

lonely without you."
"He won't retire until the last minute anyway, so why not
just leave him be?"
"That's true."
Since he was the head of the club, he would probably

continue to play games in the club room until the last day of
school. Probably, even if he took the entrance exam to
Tohashi University in his current state, he would almost
certainly pass.
"Well, I'll be going to the club in the next week or so. I

have some business to attend for this week. Please let the
club president know."
"Yeah. We don't go every day either, by the way."
So how long is this craze going to last?"
"Hmm? Oh, you mean this novel?"
"Yeah, that one."
Because both Shindo and Saito are reading erotic novels

together, people might think that I'm in the same boat as
them. In fact, I didn't read any of them at school. Even if it's
not at school, I don't feel like taking it home with me
because there's a chance that Sayaka will see it.
If she catches me doing that, she'll make fun of me for the

rest of my life.
"You may not understand. There's a lot of man's

principles here. What's important in eroticism is not visual.
It's the situation. Situations stir up a man's libido many
times over. Once a man learns that, even if it's just text, it's
enough to get him excited."
The talk seemed to be getting longer, so I put my hand out

in front of me to interrupt it. I was afraid people would hear
me.
"Well, maybe you're too young to understand. Right,

Shindo?"
Shindo nodded 'that's right' with a very serious face.
"That's right. It's not a lukewarm craze. It's about

manhood, you know, manhood."
"Manhood huh."
I was so dumbfounded that I couldn't even say anything.

So far, the teacher hadn't found out, but it was probably only
a matter of time. I'm afraid to imagine what kind of
humiliation they'll be subjected to when the teacher finds
out.
"Don't read too much in class."
"Don't worry. It's just like doing my homework for health

and PE class."
"I hope you can say that to the teacher as well."
But no matter what I said, the two of them would not

stop. Otaku has an amazing ability to concentrate on what
they like. They don't care what others think of them, and
they put all their energy into what they find enjoyable. That
in itself is not a bad thing.
However, I would like them to suppress the occasional

"oohs" and "hoo hoos" of excitement. This is not something
that happens in class. But during breaks, they don't hesitate
to let it out.
The clock reached the start of the first period. The sound
of the chime rang out.
"Come on, the teacher is almost here."
"I know."
Fortunately, the first-period class was modern literature.
The modern literature teacher did not pay attention to the
students, but only explained things in a rambling manner.
First of all, he doesn't reproach Saito and the others.
But that didn't mean that they could read erotic novels.
I took out my textbook from my bag and looked at

Fujisaki without thinking.
I haven't talked to Fujisaki yet today. Even though I was

back to my normal self, I couldn't help but feel defensive
when I tried to talk to Fujisaki.
There was nothing unusual about Fujisaki. She is chatting

with the girls behind her.
Naturally, I'm not dissatisfied with Fujisaki. Normally, I

would have jumped up and said, "By all means" the moment
she confessed her feelings to me. If I were to talk to anyone
about such a problem, I would be strangled to death.
It's such an extravagant problem.
In the middle of the conversation, the girl behind Fujisaki

seemed to have noticed my gaze and pointed at me.
Fujisaki's gaze also turned to me.
My heart skipped a beat.
Our eyes met. I didn't know what expression to make. An

awkwardness lingered in me.
Fujisaki seemed to be troubled, but she immediately

smiled.
I could only smile back vaguely.
***
...It was that night that I received a line from Enami-san.
Risa Enami: Hey.
The phone vibrated. A casual message, as if she was

speaking to me verbally. I stopped solving the math problem
and touched the screen.
The air conditioner hasn't been working well since a while

ago. I turned up the temperature once with the remote
control and typed a reply.
Naoya Ookusu: Mm?
The cold was making it hard for her to do anything, but I

wondered if she was feeling a little better.
I waited for the next message as I continued my studies.

After about five minutes, my phone finally shuddered.
Risa Enami: Nothing to do.
Just one text. I couldn't believe that it would take five

minutes just for this. Either she didn't notice my message
right away, or she was wondering what to type. It was hard
to imagine the latter, so maybe it was the former.
It's been a while since I've heard from Enami-san. I don't

think I've heard from her since the time I got beaten to a
pulp by those delinquents.
It was already past ten o'clock. I was starting to get sleepy.
On the other hand, Enami-san may have slept too much

and is now feeling wide awake.
Naoya Ookusu: How's your cold?
Risa Enami: I'm almost recovered.
This time it came quickly. I sip from the plastic bottle on

the desk. It's a caffeine-free energy drink that I've been into
lately. The carbonation spread in my mouth.
Risa Enami: It's been a long time since I've had a cold. I
realized how hard it was to be sick. I couldn't stop the chills.
Naoya Ookusu: Indeed, you looked so pale when we

came. It seemed like you had no time to care about us.
Risa Enami: ...I'm sorry about that. I really wanted to

send you away. I didn't want you guys to have to deal with
that by staying here too long.
Naoya Ookusu: I know. We didn't mind a bit, either. By

the way, did Nishikawa visit you again today?
Risa Enami: She did. We had more time today, so we

talked a bit.
Naoya Ookusu: I see.
Then maybe I should have gone too.
However, Nishikawa is really diligent. If Nishikawa were a

man, all women would fall in love with her. But Nishikawa is
also popular among men. Although her appearance is flashy,
she is usually cute and has a good personality.
I closed my math book and fell into the bed with my

phone in my hand. The wind from the air conditioner blew
at me. A lot of papers on the wall are shaking and making
little noises.
A lot of letters are dancing. Words that have been
repeatedly pounded into my mind. When Sayaka saw this
scene, she was taken aback and seriously worried, saying,
"Are you back from the battlefield or what?". I'm sure
Enami-san would be taken aback and make fun of me if she
saw it.
I couldn't see much out the window due to the reflected

light. I bit down a yawn.
Naoya Ookusu: How's your mother doing?
Risa Enami: She's not yet recovered.
The living room is mostly cleaned. Now all I have to do is

clean up the kitchen and I'll have accomplished my request.
However, the situation hasn't changed one bit.
I was concerned that even if we cleaned it up, it would

become dirty again.
Naoya Ookusu: Is it hard?
Risa Enami: Not really. I'm already used to it. I've been
trying not to get too involved.
Naoya Ookusu: I heard from Nishikawa. I heard you're

crammed with part-time jobs.
After a pause of about a minute, the next message is sent.
Risa Enami: Oh yeah. I heard that. Well, it's not

something to hide, I guess.
Naoya Ookusu: Is that the reason why you were often

late?
Risa Enami: Yes.
The old Enami-san that I remember is the one who is

always late, and the one who sleeps in class. I thought she
wasn't interested in others, but maybe she was exhausted
before that.
Risa Enami: Even if you call it a part-time job, it's not

like I'm doing anything weird. I often worked late at night at
a karaoke bar or a convenience store. I didn't want to stay in
one place of work too long, so I worked at different places
from time to time. In those workplaces, the work doesn't
change much, so I could apply quickly even if I had to switch
around a lot.
Naoya Ookusu: How many shifts do you work?
Risa Enami: Every day
Naoya Ookusu: What about sleeping hours?
Risa Enami: Not much, I guess. I've been cutting back

on my shifts lately, so I have a lot more time to spare.
I was surprised that she spoke more easily than I

expected.
Maybe she really didn't want anything to do with his

mother. Otherwise, she would have put in an earlier shift.
Perhaps she was just hanging out while there was still
daylight and didn't come home at night for her part-time
job. As a result, the things she had been holding onto
became apparent in this way.
—I've been cutting back on my shifts lately, so I have a

lot more time to spare.
I thought that this "recently" was referring to the time
when Enami-san became serious. If that's the case, then it
wasn't just a matter of money that she was working part-
time.
Naoya Ooksu: But you continue to work?
Risa Enami: That you see. It's not that I don't like to do
part-time work or anything.
Naoya Ookusu: How did you manage not to get caught

by the school?
Risa Enami: Well, there's no problem. I chose a place

where people from our school are unlikely to come.
In fact, I've never heard anything about a part-time job

from Shiroyama sensei. He simply told me that she was late
because she was unserious.
Suddenly, I thought back to the photo I had seen in

Enami-san's room. I couldn't ask her about that picture.
However, I had a hunch that the image that lingered in my
mind was the key to unlocking the inner workings of Enami-
san's mind.
Naoya Ookusu: But doesn't it increase the risk of being

found out if you change your workplace from time to time?
One day, it might end up at a place where our school's

students and teachers go. Enami-san's house is within
walking distance from the school. Even if she were to travel
far for her part-time job, I didn't think she would have
several convenient places to go.
Risa Enami: The opposite actually. It's riskier to work at

the same place all the time.
Naoya Ookusu: Why?
In the first place, it's troublesome to go out of your way to

quit or find a new part-time job. If it were me, I'd never
switch.
Risa Enami: Staying in the same place for a long time

will be troublesome, always
Naoya Ookusu: I don't understand. What do you mean?
Since it's Enami-san, maybe she doesn't fit in with the

group life. However, what was said was not about that.
Risa Enami: For example, let's say you're at a karaoke

bar and you're serving juice. Then, drunken salarymen
would get involved with you in strange ways. They would say
things like, "You're cute." or "Tell me your contact
information." Gradually, rumors start to spread, and the
type of people you don't like start to come to you.
Naoya Ookusu: So that's how it is.
Then it's understandable. Enami-san is a famous person

at school. No matter how unsociable she is, she has an aura
that she can't hide. If such a person is unleashed on the
general public, it is bound to be troublesome.
Risa Enami: It's not just the customers. There are times
when the people I work with also come on to me. I don't
want to get caught up in a romance that I don't really
understand. So if I see even the slightest sign of trouble, I
just leave. Just as far as I can count, I've changed at least ten
times.
The same thing was happening at our school as well.

However, the difference from school is that it is easy to
relocate jobs. I suppose it's natural to change since she must
have felt she was in danger.
Risa Enami: I don't know why, but when people of the

same age get together at a part-time job, they like to form
line groups. I don't need to exchange contact information
because I talk about my shifts with the manager and I don't
have the opportunity to ask anyone to switch shifts. I don't
need to exchange contact information with them.
Naoya Ookusu: I think I understand what you mean.
Risa Enami: That's why most of the time, nothing good

comes out of it. Understand?
I realized that beautiful women have their own struggles.
Naoya Ookusu: I think it's simply because you can't talk

to people properly, Enami-san...
I typed it thinking that she would probably get angry at

me for saying this anyway. However, Enami-san's reply after
that was surprisingly indifferent.
Risa Enami: Yes, yes.
Naoya Ookusu: What's with that reaction?
Risa Enami: I'm used to being told that, so I just don't

think about it anymore. Yes, yes, my apologies, I'm not very
good at socializing.
Naoya Ookusu: You should try a little harder...
Risa Enami: Of course not. What good does it do to get

to know each other? None, right?
Naoya Ookusu: Well, maybe so.
Indeed, in Enami-san's case, even if she gets along well

with others, she might just be prone to getting involved in
troublesome situations. I hear that women are more serious
about love. If two women fall in love with the same person,
but only one gets to be in a relationship with the other party,
they will not get along well. Even without that, if Enami-san
smiles, a lot of guys will approach her, which will cause an
unpleasant reaction from other girls.
Naoya Ookusu: Well, I understand about your part-

time job. Don't push yourself too hard. It would be a shame
to be late since the teacher's opinion of you has just started
to improve.
Risa Enami: I guess so.
I don't want to get into trouble either, but this is the path
I'm on, and I want to do what I can.
Naoya Ookusu: Nishikawa and I are here, too. If you

need anything, we're here to help you.
So I typed a message like that.
The message was immediately read.
However, there was no response for a while.
The sound of the clock ticking. A minute or two passed,

but the phone didn't tremble. Just a moment ago, I received
a reply within a minute at the latest. I was worried that I had
said something strange, so I read my message again, but
there was nothing strange.
—Did she fall asleep?
Enami-san is a fickle person. That could well be the case.
About five minutes later, just as I was about to give up, my
phone suddenly shuddered.
Risa Enami: Cheeky.
It was a scathing comment, but I could tell that it wasn't

meant in a bad way.
Even though the reply came about five minutes later, I

immediately read it, which was strangely embarrassing, as if
I had been waiting for a reply all along. I typed the next
message as if to cover it up.
Naoya Ookusu: Are you coming to school tomorrow?
There was almost no lag between when the message was

read and when the reply arrived.
Risa Enami: I think I will. I'll wear a mask, though.
Naoya Ookusu: That's good to hear!
I realized that we had been exchanging messages for

almost an hour. I looked up at the clock and saw that it was
eleven o'clock. I have to resume my studies soon.
Naoya Ookusu: See you at school tomorrow, then.
Risa Enami: Yeah. Bye.
With that, I put my phone to sleep. I got up from the bed

and put an energy drink in my mouth. It was warm because
the air conditioner had raised the temperature.
I clapped my face, regained my energy, and turned my

attention to the problem set again.
***
"Enami-san, do you mind if I throw this away?"
"Hold on a second."
The next day, we were at Enami-san's house again.

Enami-san came to school as she had said yesterday. After
discussing it with Nishikawa, we decided to carry out the
rest of the cleaning.
Right now, I'm cleaning the area around the sink, which I
left until last in the living room, wiping away the stuck-on
mold and other debris. The trash was gradually cleared
away, with Enami-san bravely exterminating the occasional
cockroach.
Enami looked at the ladle in my hand and said, "No, I

don't need it".
"Most of the stuff in here isn't very good. We might as well

throw out all the utensils."
"Even the pans?"
"Ah yes. Better buy all of them again."
I couldn't put all the other garbage together, so I packed

them in a separate bag. It's been about an hour since I
started today's cleaning, and I'm surprisingly on target. To
begin with, all the trash here is an avalanche of stuff that
came as an extension of the living room. I guess the kitchen
hadn't been used for a while.
The only thing I wish they'd do something about is the

cockroaches.
Nishikawa was completely reluctant after one cockroach
appeared. At present, she is looking around and collecting
garbage with tongs. The frightened expression on her face
was new to me since I usually see her so cheerful and
energetic.
"Ha, they're not around, are they?"
"It's okay, it's okay."
"Why are you so relaxed, Risa-chan?"
She was almost going crazy. I was not in a good state of

mind either. I'm not good with cockroaches as well. The only
one who remained calm was Enami-san.
As expected, Mother Enami reacted to the loud shouting.

She looked at us for a moment and then quickly averted her
gaze. To be honest, she didn't seem to be very interested in
cleaning the kitchen either. However, she might complain
later about the kitchen utensils we were about to throw
away. I had to be careful about that.
Thanks to a lot of cleaning, the smell in the room has

faded a lot. It's a big change from the first time I visited this
room. Since We've been ventilating the room regularly, I feel
like there's less dust flying around in the air.
The only thing that hasn't changed is the temperature.

Perhaps the filters of the air conditioner have not been
cleaned well. Or perhaps there is something wrong with the
machine at the root.
There was a constant rattling noise.
"Let's take a break!"
Nishikawa declared, having reached her limit. There was
no particular reason to refuse, so both Enami-san and I
agreed.
Nishikawa and Enami-san retreated to Enami-san's room.

Well, I guess that's about the only place one can relax in this
house. Even though the living room had been rearranged,
there were still broken pieces of furniture lying here and
there. I don't even know where the pieces of the broken
dishes are, so it's hard to sit back and relax.
But I decided to stay in the living room. I made up a lie

that "I'd take a break after I got as far as I could".
The reason for that was...
After I made sure that they were gone, I approached

Mother Enami. She looked a little better, but she still didn't
seem to be in perfect physical condition.
Mother Enami looked up.
"Oh... what's wrong?"
She seemed to be puzzled that I had come alone. Until

now, Enami-san was also in the same room. Perhaps being
alone with a complete stranger made her nervous.
"I came here to talk to you."
I said clearly.
I've been curious about Mother Enami. I don't think I can

do much for her. But if I don't talk to her at least, I don't
know if I can go any further. It's not that I wanted to corner
this person or anything.
"Talk? What do you want to talk about?"
"No. I just thought we'd have a little chat."
I didn't want to alarm her. I was not trying to get

everything out of her either. I just wanted to get a glimpse of
the story behind them.
"You don't seem to have recovered yet, how are you

feeling now?"
Mother Enami's cheeks relaxed a little.
"Fufu. I'm fine. It's just that she's exaggerating. My sore

throat is already better."
When she smiles, her face resembles Enami-san's.
"I'm sorry that things have been hectic lately. We're

almost done with the cleaning."
"Ah, thank you. I feel like it's much cleaner now."
She understands the changes in the living room and is not

as angry as she used to be because she knows that the
changes are not a problem for her. I wanted to find out
where that line was as much as I could.
And that's not all.
That picture. Something happened in this house once.
I don't want to know what happened. I just wanted to

understand what this person cherished here.
"Um..."
As I spun the words, the scene from that time flashed
through my mind. She was dragging the table and shouting
at Enami-san. The hallway leading from the front door still
bore the scars of that moment.
"Why are you sleeping there?"
I said it. I ended up saying it. I felt that I had to ask at

least once, even though I would withdraw it as soon as I saw
any sign of trouble.
"What do you mean?"
"This is a small place, and I don't think it's an appropriate

place to sleep. If you're not feeling well, I think you'd be
better off somewhere more relaxing..."
Essentially, this space is just a space set aside for pulling

up a chair. You can't even tell she was there unless you look
over the table, and more importantly, it's not very hygienic.
Considering the fact that there was garbage piled up all
around here, it was a small space surrounded by a wall of
garbage.
Not much air from the air conditioner could reach here.
What on earth was she doing here?
Unlike what I had imagined, Mother Enami's mood was

not dampened.
"That's not the case. Everyone feels at home in different

places. It's just that this is the optimal place for me."
"Optimal...?"
"That's right. I like it here."
As her health improved, her tone of voice became clearer.
Her hair was shaggy, but she looked young for the mother of
a high school girl.
"Were you staying here before the fever started?"
"It's not like I moved here because I got a fever or

anything."
"For how long? for years...?"
Finally, there was a change in Mother Enami. I saw it

several times, the stopping of time. I must not go any
further.
"No, it's nothing."
It's like a switch being turned on and off. Once the switch
is turned on, something strange happens, but if you press it
again, it returns to normal. It seems that the switch is in the
past after all. Just knowing that is enough for me.
"Isn't cleaning a nuisance?"
If it was only garbage, Mother Enami would not complain.

It seems that some of the trash that had been stored until
yesterday had already been collected, and she did not
particularly resist.
"Why? It wasn't a nuisance. We're better off without

garbage."
"Yes, that's true. Sorry for asking a strange question."
The things we've thrown away so far have been recognized

as garbage. If that's the case, it means that the broken
furniture was not considered garbage. If someone throws
away something that is not garbage without permission, it
may be natural to be angry.
This person has her own rules. It doesn't mean that there
is anything wrong with that.
A person's perception is not absolute. Every human being

perceives a world that is different from reality, just as we use
words to lump together things that are made up of small
molecules.
We must not just deny it.
"But how did you end up hoarding so much?"
"Because I didn't throw it away."
"Why?"
"Because there was no point in throwing it away. There's

always garbage. Besides, if she really wanted to throw it
away, that girl would have done something about it."
For better or worse, she wasn't interested in throwing it

away or keeping it.
"But if you keep the trash around for a long time, it will
smell and bugs will come out. In fact, some of the garbage
was covered with insects."
"That's right."
"But, the reason it didn't reach the worst level was that
Enami-san took care of it from time to time?"
"Well, yes, she did come here from time to time. I'm not
sure if she wanted to talk to me or not, but she would leave
immediately. She was the one who gave me my food also."
"I see. Didn't you want to do something about it?"
"I told you before, didn't I? Garbage comes out. No matter

what you do, it always comes out. Even if you throw it away,
it accumulates. What's the point in throwing it away?"
Gradually, I couldn't understand what Mother Enami was

saying.
"When you live, you consume something. When we

consume something, something we don't need comes out.
People call it garbage. There is a lot of garbage generated
every day. No matter how much you throw away, you will
never get rid of all the garbage. Then, you don't need to do it
anyway. Because it doesn't matter. You don't pay attention
to the unimportant things in your daily life, do you? Every
time you take a step, do you think about whether or not ants
are living underneath? You'd go crazy if you had to pay
attention to that. That's why people divide their lives into
two categories: things they do care about and things they
don't care about. Isn't this the same thing?"
"That's right, isn't it? So, for Enami-san's mother, it didn't

really matter, did it?"
"That's right."
Even if there was a strange smell or an insect, she

recognized that it was not important enough to pay attention
to. Even if one didn't care about stepping on an ant, they
would if it was a larger creature. A normal human being
would want to avoid them, but for those who can't think of a
good enough reason to go to the trouble of avoiding them, it
might be judged as futile.
There are people in the world who live in garbage houses.
They accumulate so much trash that their yards are
overflowing with it, and they get complaints from their
neighbors. The people who are interviewed on TV say the
opposite. They say that there is nothing that they don't need.
So, this person is different from those people. Maybe this

person was not interested in the current reality.
"But even though I'm trying to live my life like that, not
caring about the things that don't matter, I've been feeling
very tired lately. Strangely, there are more things I don't care
about."
"I-Is that so?"
"Yes. I really want to sleep all day... I guess that's what it

means to be old."
As I listened to her, I wondered if it was really "something

she doesn't care about".
It wasn't that it didn't matter, but that she tried to

"believe" that it didn't. And the reason she did so was that it
was more painful if she didn't deceive herself. But as a result
of looking away, she remained this person without any
change.
"...You are the same age as Risa, aren't you?"
"Yes."
"As you get older, you will understand. Even if you don't
understand it now."
I nodded in silence.
"The older you get, the more things you have. But it's very
rare for someone to live with everything. Everyone has to
make a choice somewhere. Or, even if we don't choose to,
some things just fall out of our grasp. When you live like
this, the things that are important to you as a young person
may seem unimportant to you. Or vice versa."
Mother Enami turned her head away from me and

coughed twice.
"Do you understand what I'm saying?"
I wasn't sure how to answer. I think I understood what

she was trying to say, but I don't think I understood what
was hidden behind it. In the end, I just replied vaguely,
"Well" and that was it.
And then. Suddenly, Mother Enami stopped talking.
"......"
She was looking at me with a blank expression. Her gaze

pierced straight through me to the point of being
frightening.
I panicked inwardly. I wondered if I had said something

wrong. Was it wrong to reply, "Well"?
When I was desperately trying to figure out what I should

do to fix it, mother Enami laughed as if she was about to
erupt.
"Fu... Fufu..."
"Ah, um, what's it...?"
Apparently, she wasn't mad at me. As I felt the tension
dissipate, I couldn't control the feeling of confusion that
came next. I really can't read what this person is thinking.
She doesn't give me an answer right away. She laughed for

a while, and then looked back at me.
"You are really interesting..."
"Eh?"
"You see, you show everything you're thinking on your

face."
I remembered that Enami-san had said the same thing to

me.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Yes. Even now."
I touched my own face, but I couldn't tell what kind of

face I was making.
"Yeah, that's true. It will be troubling to hear all this."
"No, it's not like that..."
"It's fine, it's fine...just forget it."
Strangely enough, Mother Enami was now in the best

mood ever. Maybe she was just happy that I was listening to
her.
...She was also probably just a normal mother at the

beginning. I was suddenly reminded of the obvious. If you
only look at her now, she looks like just a kind person.
"I have taken a liking to you."
Suddenly, she told me that.
"Risa, who is not very good at socializing, opened up to

you. I'm sure she likes you too."
"Even so, she's always talking badly to me."
"That's just the way she is. Don't let it bother you."
When I heard those words, I realized. That her daughter

was not "something she didn't care about".
I was relieved to know that.
"May I ask your name again"
"...It's Naoya Ookusu."
"I see. Naoya-kun, right. I'll remember that."
And now, finally.
I might have moved up in rank from "insignificant" to

"not insignificant".
We'll probably be done with cleaning today."
Mother Enami only gave a small nod.
"Mother might deny it, though. But, I think the reason

why your cold has not gone away is that this place was not
the optimal place for you. It's clean now, but there's no point
if it gets dirty again."
I wondered if my words had been heard. I had no idea,

but I had to say it anyway.
"You may not want to be affected by trash that you don't
care about. But it's necessary. That's why we came here to
clean it up."
I feel as if the words are cutting through the air. It made

me wonder if what we did was meaningless.
After all, I've only touched the surface of this person's

mind. I haven't found or solved anything that lies deeper.
This is the best I can do right now...
Finally, I said.
"Please put some effort for yourself, too."
Mother Enami's face lost all emotion. For this person, the
messiness of the room is not important. That's probably why
she can't understand what I'm saying.
At the end of a long silence that made me feel as if time

had stopped again, Mother Enami looked away and said only
one thing.
"I'll think about it."
I couldn't tell if those words meant progress or stagnation.
Chapter 05: To Move Forward
The first dish I learned to cook was rice porridge.
I had never cooked before, and I didn't even know how to

make an omelet. It's hard to believe now, but that's how
dependent I was on my mother.
During my depression, both Sayaka and my father tried

their hand at cooking. However, both of them were fatally
clumsy, and the meals they brought me were always pre-
made. This continued for a while after I came back to
normal, but there came a time when this was not possible.
Sayaka fell ill.
Her fever was around 38 degrees. I took her to the

hospital and got her some medicine to control her
symptoms, but it seemed she could hardly eat. That's when
the classic porridge came into play. So, I stood in front of the
kitchen and was astonished to find that I had no idea what
to do.
—To begin with, I had never cooked rice before.
What was always brought to the table was soft rice with
steam rising from it. But I don't know how the milled rice
grains become like that. I suppose I could boil the rice in
water, but how much rice and how much water should I put
in?
Immediately I looked it up on the Internet. There was a

lot of mixed information, and I didn't know which one to
use. First, I cleaned a cup of rice and put it in the pot. I filled
the pot with water to the right level and turned on the heat.
Sprinkle some salt and bring the water to a boiling level. I

put the eggs and green onions in the pot, and then put the
lid on the pot.
It was surprisingly hard work. I had thought that porridge

was not a big dish. No, it really wasn't a big dish, but maybe
I just felt that way because I wasn't used to it.
After about half an hour, I thought it was enough and

turned off the heat. I tried to eat it, but it was almost
tasteless. I added more salt and tore up some dried plums.
When I put it in a bowl, I realized I had made a mistake.
—The amount was too much.
It was too much for one person with little appetite to eat. I
had no idea how much a cup of rice was. It was too little
when I put it in the cup, so I was careless.
I had no choice but to pour some of it into a bowl for

myself to eat later. I put the spoon on a tray and carried it to
Sayaka's room.
She was lying on her bed, sweating. She had already slept
a lot, so she didn't feel sleepy anymore, or so she had said
earlier.
"What's that?"
She seemed to have noticed the smell when I entered the

room.
I replied, "It's porridge."
Sayaka was very surprised.
"Eh? Why? Oniichan made it?"
She raised her upper body and stared at what was in my

hand. It can't be that bad looking. I put the tray on the desk.
Sayaka crawled out of bed, wrapped herself in a blanket,

and said,
"Oh, it's proper porridge."
"What did you think it was?"
"No, I thought it was a genetic condition that prevented

us from cooking anything. You're different."
Sayaka, who still called me "Onii-chan", looked at me with

a sparkling gaze. I remember being a little proud of myself.
"If one looks on the internet, anyone can do this."
"Okay, okay."
"Go back to bed, I'll feed you."
"No, that's all right."
"What are you talking about when you're that dizzy?"
Her face is red, and her eyes look sunken in. Her body was
swaying slightly as if she was unsteady on her feet.
Reluctantly, Sayaka returned to bed. I walked over to the

side of the bed with the bowl and spoon. After scooping up
the porridge and puffing it, I brought it to her mouth.
Her mouth took in only a small amount. She must have
really had no appetite.
She chewed for a while, and then she said something.
"It's too salty and sour."
She blatantly frowned. Maybe I used too much salt the

second time.
"Is that so...?"
"Here, oniichan, you should try some of this."
She thrust it into my mouth. I tried it, and it was just as

she had said.
"Sorry..."
"It's genetic as I thought."
—I thought it wasn't that bad...
I was so focused on the quantity failure that I forgot about

the taste.
"If the taste was too light it could have been fixed. But it
can't be fixed if it's too strong... I'll go back and make it
again."
"No, it's fine." Sayaka said.
She took the bowl from my hand and started to eat quietly
by herself. To be honest, I don't think she can eat when she
doesn't have an appetite, but she didn't stop eating. Perhaps
she was being considerate in her own way.
It was frustrating. I resolved to make something delicious
next time.
In the end, Sayaka ate the entire bowl of porridge. She ate
it as if she was stuffing herself, so she must have been
straining herself.
"You really ate it all."
"Well, kind of."
She thrust the bowl back at me, turned her face away, and
laid down. Even though it was a failure, I was glad I made it
since she ate it properly.
I left Sayaka's room and returned to the kitchen. After

washing the dishes, I faced the remaining porridge.
—I guess I'll just have to eat it.
It wouldn't have been a problem if it had tasted good, but

with the way it tasted, I wasn't sure if I could finish it all.
I stuck a spoon into the pot and tried to eat it directly. It

still didn't taste good.
—But how could I not eat it when she had already

finished it?
It took me about half an hour, but I finished the porridge.
It was a memory from about four years ago.
***
Before I knew it, I was remembering things from the past.
Maybe it was because I was in the middle of eating my
lunch. My own two-tiered lunch box was filled with colorful
side dishes. Since I cook for both Sayaka and my father, I
don't use too many frozen items, and many of them are
made by me. About half of the dishes were leftover from last
night's dinner, but the other half were made in the morning.
I've gotten much better at cooking if I do say so myself.

There is not a day that goes by that I don't cook. My skills
are completely different compared to four years ago.
The tamagoyaki in my lunch box for example. The first

time I tried to make it, it lost the shape when I tried to roll it
up and resembled scrambled eggs. The seasoning and the
shape have grown to the point where it can be sold.
The stewed burdock next to it. I couldn't use the knife

well, so the pieces were all different sizes, but now they were
evenly sized.
I like to eat my lunch. I'm confident in my cooking and I

adjust the seasoning to my liking, so it's simply delicious to
eat. When I try a new dish, I get excited to see if it is still
good when it gets cold.
"......"
It was quiet. I and the two people in front of me quietly

put our food in our mouths.
I'm not talking about the usual pair of Saito and Shindo,
but Enami-san and Nishikawa for some reason. The
atmosphere was awkward. I wondered why I was in this
situation in the first place.
I tried to remember the past to escape reality, but either

way, I couldn't shake the fact in front of me. This was a
corner of the cafeteria. Naturally, I'm attracting a lot of
attention. Nishikawa and Enami-san alone stand out, but
there's a mysterious third person sitting there. There were
already rumors about the two were dating or not dating, so
now there must have been more gossip with a longer story
behind it.
Nishikawa, seemingly unable to bear the silence anymore,

opened her mouth.
"The modern literature class really makes you sleepy,

doesn't it? I try to listen seriously, but my eyelids close by
themselves. The teacher doesn't even pay attention to us."
"Yeah."
"While I was sleeping, my fake eyelashes came off you

know. Even around me, all I could hear was the sound of
others sleeping."
"That's right. I fell asleep too for a little while."
It was a trivial conversation. In fact, Nishikawa's eyes

were a little red.
"But then I realized that it's almost December... And then

it's the end of the term! Ahh, it goes by so fast."
"To make matters worse, entrance exams will be in full

swing in a year."
"I don't want to think about it!"
While we were talking, Enami-san didn't open her mouth.

She was quietly eating the bread she had bought. She doesn't
seem to eat a lot, just sandwiches and salad bread.
She didn't seem to be in a bad mood. She just didn't want
to talk.
"Nishikawa, have you decided which college you want to

go to?"
I don't know what she's planning to do, but until Enami-

san was ready to talk, I decided to have a conversation with
Nishikawa.
"No~ Not at all. I'm only thinking about enjoying the

moment! Where's Naochi?"
"I'm going to Tohashi University..."
"Oh, that's right. You have to work hard then."
For a while, the conversation continued between

Nishikawa and me. Eventually, Enami-san finished her
bread and talked to me.
"—Hey."
Interrupting the conversation, Nishikawa and I turned to

Enami-san.
"I want to ask you something."
...Originally, this situation was created at the request of

Enami-san.
As soon as lunchtime came, Nishikawa came to talk to me.

Enami-san wanted to ask me something. That's why the
three of us had moved to this cafeteria and were eating
together.
She was silent for a long time, probably because she was
thinking.
"What?"
"...Did you talk to Mom about something?"
So that's the subject. I wondered if talking about it while

Nishikawa and Enami-san were away had caused any
changes in Mother Enami. I didn't think she would find out.
"Why do you ask?"
"My mother talked to me about you. She said you're a

good kid."
"That's all?"
"That's all."
"Eh?"
"That's the weirdest thing I've heard in years. I don't know

how long it's been since we've talked about other people."
The things mother Enami didn't care about. I suppose

that has been applied to all other people up to now.
"So in the end, what did you do?"
I wasn't sure how I should answer. If possible, I didn't

want Enami-san to know. Because I knew she wouldn't like
me probing into her situation like this.
But it wasn't something I could hide. I decided to give up.
I told her everything. That I thought the problem will not

be solved if I didn't talk. And that I simply asked her why she
was sleeping there.
Enami-san's expression didn't change much.
"Hmm. Did you hear anything from mom?"
"Not so much..."
"I see."
"In case you're wondering, I wasn't trying to find out what

was going on... I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but it wasn't out of
malice or anything..."
"I know."
I don't know why she trusts me so much.
"Unless you were asking her something deep, it's fine. Did
Mom give you any trouble?"
"No, nothing like that. It was just a normal, calm

conversation."
There were times when switches were made along the

way, but in the end, everything went off without a hitch.
I was able to understand that this person must have

something to carry.
"Normal, calm...?"
"Yeah. We just chatted. I can't even remember what we

talked about. Maybe Enami-san's mother wanted to have a
conversation too."
The truth is, there's no way I don't remember. I don't

remember every word of it, but I do remember certain parts
of it.
"I don't need it anyway. Of course, it is insignificant."
A sweeping glance to the side. The clear tone of voice. I

can still recall it vividly.
"Naochi, you have a lot of dynamism in strange places,

don't you?"
"Is that so?"
"Yes. If it were me, I would never talk to her alone.

Because I wouldn't think it was something I should be
involved in."
"That's what I think, too. It's not like we did anything

serious. It's just a little chat. It's not about involving or not
involving."
Nishikawa sipped his apple juice through a straw. She put

her arms on the table and looked at me as if she was curious.
I felt like I was being probed by Nishikawa as well as

Enami-san.
"I'm sorry for asking you such a strange question."
Enami-san's expression relaxed.
"My mom's like that. I think I put you guys through a lot. I
shouldn't have relied on you so much. I just got carried
away..."
"Don't worry about it."
I guess she was wondering what in the world I had been
talking about. But more than that, she was worried that I
might have gotten into trouble. She's always been a bit
dishonest about such things.
"I'm grateful. Thanks to you, I've cleaned up a lot. The

strange smell is almost gone, and Mom's mood seems to be
getting better. She can be very violent in her room. It also
makes it easier to study..."
"Oh, you're taking it seriously."
"Obviously. I'm going to rub it into the teachers at the end

of the semester because I'm getting tired of being
complained about all the time. The better my test scores are,
the harder it will be for them to complain."
It looks like I can expect more than last time. If she not
only avoids red marks but also gets top grades, Shiroyama-
sensei might turn a blind eye.
"Risa-chan, you're studying so hard. I feel like I'll be

overtaken soon."
"You're exaggerating. My goal this time is to exceed the

average score."
Then, Enami-san smiled a little.
As always, Enami-san's smile makes me nervous. Her

usual cold expression was replaced by a gentle one. I
wondered if the crowd in the cafeteria had seen her smile. If
they did, I'm sure they would be surprised. It must be a
completely different impression from the one of Enami-san
in the classroom.
In fact, Nishikawa looked a little happy. Beauty is a
terrible thing.
"Look at you talking... You were asking me a lot of

questions before the midterm."
"Did I ask you that many questions? You're so patronizing

sometimes, aren't you?"
"I won't teach you if you talk like that."
"Yes, yes, I'm sorry. But I don't think I need to ask so

many questions this time. Last time, I only asked so many
questions because I didn't have time and I was in
rehabilitation."
Well, it's certainly not necessary. Enami-san is the type of

person who can do it if she tries. She seemed to have
listened to her classes from the midterm to the end of the
semester, and she was able to fill in some of the gaps from
the midterm. She should be able to handle the rest on her
own.
"I'll take your word for it."
"You're so bossy. Well, everything will be fine for now."
"Yeah, yeah."
Nishikawa was also laughing. She was really happy that

Enami-san was in a good mood.
"I had to rely on you for cleaning, cooking, and other

things. But I'm fine now."
Enami-san added. And I asked.
"...Hm? Wasn't the whole point of doing all this to take
care of Enami-san's mother's health by asking me to do the
cleaning and cooking as well?"
"That's right. Yes, but I don't want to ask you to do more

than that. So I'm going to learn how to cook myself after I
get the kitchen a little more organized."
"I see."
What I was thinking at that moment was about Sayaka

and Fujisaki. If I could be released here, I would not have to
burden Fujisaki anymore. Also, I could take my time to think
about my response to Fujisaki's words.
It might not be a good idea to get too deep into it.
"Okay. Then I'll leave the rest to you, Enami-san. Just

that..."
One more thing. There's one more thing I had thought of.
Basically, no more contact from now on. Back to my

normal routine.
However, I felt that it would be wrong not to see Mother

Enami again. She liked me a lot. Besides, I wanted to talk to
her again.
"Call me when you're ready to use the kitchen. I'll help

you cook for at least one time."
"...Is that okay?"
"Yeah."
Besides, I'm worried about having Enami-san do it. She
might be a surprisingly bad cook. I have a feeling that she
might just say, "Well, whatever" and throw the seasoning all
over the food.
"Then...I'll be relying on you."
"Sure."
I don't know what the results will be. Maybe she'll wish I
wasn't here.
Still, I had a feeling that there was a role that only I could
play.
***
Fujisaki and I were walking down the hallway side by side.
A large number of printouts were in our hands. I have

more than she does, but Fujisaki also has a lot in her hands.
If it was just one sheet per person in the class, there would
be no problem. However, since we had to hand out several
sheets per person, both Fujisaki and I had to carry so much
that our center of gravity was tilted backward.
This was a request from our political economy teacher.

Although he is not as much as Shiroyama-sensei, he
mistakenly thinks that he can freely use the class committee
members. After hearing about it through another teacher,
we went to the staff room and pondered over the pile of
materials there.
"I think this is getting a little tough."
"Sorry... I wish I could have carried it all by myself."
"Oh, no! You don't have to worry about that! I'll never
leave it to Ookusu-kun alone."
Maybe it was because she said that, but the print held in
Fujisaki's arms was about to collapse. I went around in front
of Fujisaki and supported the print with my shoulder.
"Watch out!"
"I-I'm sorry..."
Fujisaki held the top of the printouts
To tell the truth, Fujisaki had been acting suspiciously

since a while ago. Her voice was a little higher than usual.
Sometimes she seemed to nearly trip over herself, and her
eyes swam from place to place.
Maybe it's my fault...
After all, I haven't been able to give a response until now.

I think that's why Fujisaki is feeling so nervous, wondering
when I'm going to answer. At some point, I'm sure to do it,
but I haven't been able to organize my feelings.
"He didn't have to leave it to the two of us. If I had known

there were so many, I would have asked the other students
to help."
"That teacher is not that considerate. Probably he just

thought, 'I can't carry the prints by myself, I'll just ask those
two to do it for me.'"
He's a good teacher. He's passionate about education, and

that's why he makes such a large number of handouts.
The only thing we need is for him to be a little more
considerate of us.
"Have you seen the contents of this?"
"No. I haven't seen it."
"I skimmed it earlier, but it looked like a copy of another

reference book. It looked difficult, so I don't think many
people would look at it if we handed it out."
"Ehh... I see."
That teacher is a bit of a nerd and can get overheated in

class, ignoring the reactions of the students. It is not
uncommon for him to ramble on by himself and end up
talking about things that have nothing to do with the main
topic.
Many students don't want to listen intently because it

won't help them much on the test. The stories themselves
are interesting, but they are too long.
"Are you okay, Ookusu-kun? My arm is getting tired."
"Don't worry. I can handle it this much at least."
"Okay..."
Silence. I couldn't walk quickly because of the heavy

printouts. I thought about what to say next, but nothing
came to mind.
Normally, I would be able to talk about anything without

thinking about it. That's how easy it is to get along with
Fujisaki.
But right now, I'm having a hard time dealing with her.
Fujisaki seems to feel the same way. She was thinking

about what to say but didn't seem to be able to think of
anything right away. For a while, the silence continued.
There was still a little more time before class. A group of

students enjoying a normal break time walked past us.
"Um..."
Fujisaki was the one who broke the silence. When I

replied, "What?" Fujisaki looked very uncomfortable.
"What were you and Enami-san talking about in the

cafeteria?"
I was at a loss for words.
At that time, quite a few students had witnessed the

scene. It was only natural that Fujisaki would hear about it.
"That's..."
"I'm sorry I asked you such a weird question."
"No..."
If Sayaka saw me in my current situation, she would be

furious with me.
"You can't answer after all?"
I wasn't sure what to do. I can't tell her everything, but

maybe I should tell her at least a little. However, as it is a
very sensitive issue, discretion is required.
Fujisaki had an anxious look on her face. That's when I
made up my mind.
"...I've been asked to do a favor." I said.
In my mind, I apologized to Enami-san.
"I can't go into detail about it. But it's a pretty serious
matter. I feel like I'm involved in it in a way that I don't
really understand, so I can't say that I'm that deep into it."
"Okay."
"I was having a talk with Enami-san about it. She said it's
okay now."
"I... I see..."
I looked straight into Fujisaki's eyes to show that I wasn't

lying. Maybe I should have told her earlier if this was the
extent of the information.
"So it's not like there's any deep agenda or anything. I

don't think I'll be working with Enami-san and Nishikawa
like this much longer."
"Can I ask you one question?"
"Yeah, sure."
Fujisaki's foot stopped, and so did mine. After a short

pause, Fujisaki asked.
"If it's such an important issue, why did Enami-san ask

Ookusu-kun to help with it?"
I couldn't answer. Because I didn't understand the reason
myself.
But I have a feeling there's a reason for it.
"Is there a reason?"
"No..."
There's no point in thinking about what you don't know.
"That goes for you too, Ookusu-kun."
"Eh?"
"Normally, you would have refused. It must have been

pretty hard for you. I can tell by looking at you. Not only in
the physical sense, but also in many other ways."
It was a good argument.
When I heard about it at the café, I didn't have the option

of saying no. I naturally said, "Okay". And that didn't
surprise me or Enami-san.
"The first time we talked to Enami-san. When the teacher

asked you to help, and we went to a diner, you looked really
reluctant."
"No, it's not that I was reluctant..."
"...Honestly, you didn't want to do it, do you?"
"...Yeah."
I don't feel like I can lie to Fujisaki. Maybe she can see
through my habit of telling lies.
"Both you and Enami-san are mysterious. It's as if you
two resonate with each other somehow."
A questioning gaze reached me. Then she followed it up

with a "Sorry."
Actually, she didn't really need to say that. I guess me

looking so uncomfortable brought out that apology.
But Fujisaki's words were not out of line.
The residue of guilt is what makes me who I am today. I

want to do what I can as much as possible.
It's not only for Enami-san. It's also for her mother.
There are people everywhere who are just like me. People
who are stuck in the past as a wedge. Mother Enami is also
bound by her past. Even if I didn't know the details of her
situation, I could at least understand that. I can understand
how she feels in no small way.
Normally, I'm not in a position to complain to Mother

Enami. It's the same for me. If I was truly moving forward, I
would have given my answer to Fujisaki long ago. The
reason I haven't is that I'm afraid to move forward.
"I'm the one who's totally to blame, so there's no need to

apologize."
I've given Fujisaki a lot of unpleasant feelings.
"...Are you okay regarding Sayaka-chan now?"
"Yeah, I'll be able to take some time off from now on. I
really shouldn't have brought Fujisaki into our family's
problem."
And that's when I realized something.
The same goes for Enami-san's request. It's a family

matter. A stranger shouldn't involve in it.
But the reason why I involved Fujisaki was that I thought

in my heart that Fujisaki would accept it. It might have been
the same for Enami-san.
"...Shall we go? My arms are starting to hurt."
"Ah, I'm sorry! Let's go!"
Because we were standing still, we were still a long way

from the classroom. It's hard just to walk without damaging
the pile of prints.
"I'm going to miss seeing Sayaka-chan."
"I'm sure she'd go anywhere for Fujisaki. I hope you'll

invite her to hang out with you next time. She doesn't have
as many friends as you might think."
"Eh? Even though she's that cute?"
"She doesn't open up because she's always acting like a

cat. I'm sure some guys try to woo her, but she hates
flirtatious guys more than anything."
"She seems like a good girl."
Sayaka is very wary of people. This is because she was

bullied by boys when she was in kindergarten. She was cute,
to begin with, but she became a target for boys who wanted
to get her attention.
I'm not going to tell her, because if she finds out that I
told her this, she'll kill me.
"But, yeah, I get it. I'll ask her out next time. I wonder
what kind of things Sayaka-chan likes."
"She likes karaoke a lot."
"Ah, then I think I'll go with that. It's a safe place."
I noticed that the uncomfortable silence was gone. It's just

me and Fujisaki as usual.
We talked about some of the more in-depth points, and

maybe the rancor faded. I was more relieved by that than by
the fact that we had gone off-topic. After all, I didn't want
my relationship with Fujisaki to get worse.
"What does Fujisaki sing at karaoke?"
"I usually sing popular songs. Not that I know a lot of it."
"Ah, well then, why don't the three of us go?"
"Yeah, that's a good idea."
Even when we were on the library committee together, we

never went to karaoke together. We only occasionally went
to cafes or family restaurants.
We checked each other's schedules and agreed that the

next Sunday would be a good time.
"Okay. Anyway, I'll check with Sayaka later. I think she'll

be fine."
"Okay! I'm looking forward to it."
As we were talking about this, we reached the front of the
classroom. I was finally free of the burden on my arms.
I opened the door forcefully with my foot, climbed up the

podium, and put the printouts down on the table. The
classmates who noticed our presence only gave us a
disgusted look, as if to say, "Not again".
Both Fujisaki and I returned to our seats. Then I was

poked from behind, so I turned around to look at Saito.
"What?"
"Have you been flirting with her again?"
"It's not like that."
He should just read erotic novels. There was no need for

him to say anything unnecessary.
I pulled out the next lesson's material from my desk.
***
When I told Sayaka about the invitation from Fujisaki, she

agreed with a quick two words. She seemed to be quite
happy that she was invited and seemed to be excited about
what to wear. However, when I added that I would be there
too, she looked blatantly displeased.
"Eh? Why are you joining us?"
"You dislike my presence that much?"
"Yes."
She said it quite clearly. I was hurt inside.
Inside Sayaka's room. Thanks to the recent arrival of
Fujisaki, the room has become much tidier. The trash that
was usually stored in the corner of the room has all been
collected, and textbooks and reference books have been
organized on the desk.
It would be so much easier if it was always done like this.
I sighed.
"Isn't it fine? Even I'm looking forward to it. I mean, there

are only three of us, not a big group, and I'm sure you can
talk to Fujisaki normally."
"That's not the point. It's kind of embarrassing when your

family is there."
"I don't think so at all."
It was a typical adolescent comment. Maybe she was

worried about the fact that I always treated her like a child.
"So, where are we going?"
"Karaoke."
"I see, not a bad choice."
Sayaka loves going to Karaoke. Her good mood seems to

have returned a little.
"Hmm... I can't leave my shitty brother in the corner

either. Can you please not use me as an excuse for your date
with Fujisaki-san?"
"I don't mean that. It's simply because Fujisaki also said
that she would miss seeing Sayaka. Even though you guys
are in the same school, you don't get a chance to talk much
since you are in different grades."
"That's true..."
She seemed to be embarrassed. There's a part of her that

just can't be honestly happy at times like this. Even now, she
just twitches the edge of her lips and tries not to show it on
her face.
"Then, I'll say okay to Fujisaki."
"Okay."
I took my phone out of my pocket and sent a quick

message on Line. It seemed that the other party was also
looking at her phone, and it was read immediately. Soon, I
received a stamp with a smiling face.
I decided on a time while talking with Sayaka, and when I

told Fujisaki, she agreed. I put my phone back in my pocket
and told Sayaka about it as well.
"Well, let's meet at the next station on Sunday at 1 pm.

There's a Karaoke hall there."
"Yes, I think that's fine."
I had been there once with my family. The machines are

not that old and the rooms are not too small.
"...It's been a while since I've gone out for Karaoke with
my shitty brother."
"Well, you and I don't often go together."
"Because you always sing songs I am not familiar with.
Something like nostalgic melodies? It's all 1990s and early
2000s. I don't listen to that stuff."
"And you're always singing the theme song of some otome

game I don't understand."
"Unfortunately for you, I've listened to all the latest

popular songs and can sing them. There's no way I'm going
to choose those songs in front of Fujisaki-san."
"As expected of a secret otaku..."
She must have been hiding her otaku hobby from her few
friends as well. Maybe she is preparing for the time when
she goes to karaoke with those friends.
On the other hand, I'm not very familiar with the latest
songs, except for anime songs. My repertoire consists of
songs I heard when I was a kid and songs I learned from my
otaku hobby. In that sense, I'm not much different from
Sayaka.
"Don't ever sing weird songs, okay? I know I'm like you,
but if you sing songs that are full of otaku taste, Fujisaki-san
will just look at you like you are weird."
"I know that much myself. I'm only going to sing the
songs that everyone knows."
Many of the hits from the '90s and early 2000s are still
being listened to today, just that Sayaka doesn't know much
about them. It was a time when CDs were selling like
hotcakes, and the popularity of artists back then was a social
phenomenon.
"Sayaka, you sometimes miss a note, so you'd better be
careful. Make sure you keep one ear closed so that you can
hear your own voice..."
Then, the red-faced Sayaka shouted loudly.
"Ugh, you're so annoying! Leave me alone! You shitty

brother isn't that good either, are you?"
"That's true. Well, maybe it's all genetic."
When I said that, Sayaka laughed bitterly and swept her

gaze to the side.
There's one more reason why I and Sayaka don't go to

karaoke together. It's because we rarely go to karaoke as a
family.
It's only because we don't want to go with our father.
"Well, either way, you are better than our father..."
Her eyes were distant.
I still remember it vividly. It was probably about two years

ago. My father suddenly said, "Let's go to karaoke!" and
since there was no reason to refuse, I and Sayaka decided to
accompany him.
What awaited us after that was hell.
One thing, my father was tone-deaf. The highs and lows

pulsated in such a mysterious way that I forgot the concept
of pitch. It was almost scary to listen to.
Next, my father ignores the order. Or should I say, he's

not very adept at it? Whenever he thinks "Oh, I feel like
singing that song," he would start singing it in succession. I
tried to complain to him, but he was in such a good mood
that he wouldn't listen to me.
It was a trauma for us.
After that, no matter how many times my dad asked us to

go out with him, we never did. So whenever he went to
karaoke, he was always alone.
There was probably no one else who would go with him

other than us. If you go once, you'll never want to go through
that again.
"By the way, don't ever tell him about this."
"Ah, that's right. It'll be trouble if he gets to know."
My father loves karaoke. If he knew we were going, he

might try to follow us no matter what. In addition,
considering the disastrous state of affairs when I invited
Fujisaki to my house, it is conceivable that he might say,
"I'm greeting my future daughter-in-law."
...It's really no good. We have to hide it no matter what.
"If by any chance our father comes with us, it will be a

traumatic experience for Fujisaki. I don't want anyone else
to have to go through that."
"Yes, yes. We can't have any more victims."
Strangely enough, my father has been doing karaoke a lot,

but he never seems to get any better. The reason why I know
this is because when he comes home, he tells me what his
score was, even though I didn't ask him.
Generally speaking, the score is quite low, but my father
doesn't realize that. He is a happy man.
"Even when he hums, I get these chills. No, like I don't

know how he can hum so out of tune."
"I try to stay away from him when he's in a good mood.
Because I feel like my ears are going to break if I listen to his
humming."
"I don't even know what song he's humming, but it's so
obviously messed up that it makes me sick. It makes me
nervous to think that Dad is humming that song at work
too."
"Ugh, that seriously sucks..."
It's a kind of pollution. Once he starts humming, he can't

stop, so it doesn't matter what you say. The only thing you
can do is wait for it to end.
"It's really annoying because we can't stop the noise. I

wonder if he really has any friends."
"Maybe he does. Well, maybe they hate it even more than

us."
He's not a bad person. It's not that I don't respect him as a
father myself. I know I can rely on him at times, and he
watches over me warmly.
But that and this are different things.
"Dad's department is basically a desk job, so I'm sure his

humming can be heard in all directions. Just thinking about
it is terrifying."
"The offices you see on TV don't have any partitions. I bet
they can hear it."
I really don't know how he could get married. My mother

must have been a saint or something.
Sayaka fiddled with her phone.
"Well, I don't care about that father anyway."
She abruptly dropped the subject. I laughed bitterly.
"That's a terrible thing to say."
"How are things going with shitty brother and Fujisaki-

san?"
My heart jumped at the sudden question thrown in.

Sayaka's gaze flicked back and forth between the screen of
her phone and my face.
"What are you talking about?" I blurted out.
"What do you mean... No matter how naive my shitty

brother is, you should know that much, right? I'm talking
about romance."
"You also do this love-talk stuff huh..."
"Are you doing this on purpose from before to drag it on?

Answer the question."
Actually, it was on purpose. I was at a loss as to how to

answer.
"I'll ask again. How far have you gotten?"
"No, I and Fujisaki are not like that..."

"Liar. Don't underestimate the sensors of a secret otaku.
I'm usually monitoring people's expressions, so I can
understand a lot of things."
"...What's with that?"
Even though I was talking lightly, I searched for the best

course of action. I didn't want to tell anyone that she had
done something similar to a confession.
"What do you think of Fujisaki-san?"
"You're saying the same thing as our father."
"D-Don't put us together like that! I'm not saying it in her

presence."
She really doesn't want to be put together. My poor

father...
"I don't know why you're asking me that in the first place.
It has nothing to do with you."
"It's none of my business... but.."
She was gritting her teeth. Perhaps she got a hunch about
something while interacting with Fujisaki. It's true that
Sayaka's sensors are not stupid. She is sensitive to the
changes in my expression.
"Fujisaki-san initiated this karaoke as well, didn't she?"
"...Well."
"I think you should think about all this properly.

Seriously."
There is no mistake in what Sayaka is saying. I know that
I have to think about it myself.
However, thinking about it also means facing the past.

Will I be able to forgive myself? Do I have the will to move
forward?
"By the way, if I'm to tell you my personal opinion..."
She turned off the screen of the phone she had been
looking at earlier.
"I don't think anyone could be that good. I was surprised

to find out that there could be such a pure person. A high
school student is bound to have a corrupt thought or two,
but she's not like that at all. Isn't she a blessing for someone
as helpless as my brother?"
"Regardless of whether I'm helpless or not, Fujisaki

definitely has a good personality."
"She's kind, cute, smart, and she never talks bad about
anyone. She's like the ideal girl. Don't you think so?"
"..."
I couldn't answer anything. She continued as if to deliver

a finishing blow.
"I like her better than that beauty."
...She is completely aware of Fujisaki's feelings. That's

precisely why she said that. She's asking me to take
responsibility as a man.
"Anyway, just do it right on Sunday."
That was all she said, and then she turned to her
computer. Without paying attention to my presence, she
started up an otome game and put her headphones in her
ears. I guess that means the conversation is over.
There's nothing I could do about it, so I left her room.
Even after I returned to my room, I couldn't get her words

out of my head.
I have a responsibility. I'm well aware of that.
I can't run away from this forever. I have to think about it

seriously.
I ended up agonizing over it all night.
***
In the end, I didn't come to a conclusion right away.

Instead, what came down to me was a Line message from
Enami-san. The message on the line asked if it was possible
to rely on me on Saturday.
Of course, it was about helping with the cooking.
It was on Sunday that I would be hanging out with

Fujisaki and Sayaka. Naturally, there was no problem, so I
agreed with a simple answer.
This would be the last time I would visit the Enami family.
Although I felt a little guilty, I had no choice but to quit

now. It was the same as when I first received this request
from Enami-san. I want to do the best I can.
***
Saturday.
I had plans for the evening, so until then, I just studied

and played games occasionally. As a member of the science
club, I wanted to maintain a certain level of skill. In racing
games, if there is a period of time between games, you may
lose your senses and not be able to control the game
properly.
As I spent my time like this, it quickly became time to

leave the house. I cleaned myself up and headed for the
door. Then, perhaps noticing the sound of my footsteps on
the stairs, Sayaka came downstairs with me.
"What is it, Sayaka?"
"Where are you going? It doesn't look like a shopping

trip."
"It's just some errands. I'll be home for dinner."
"Hmm?"
She looked somewhat suspicious. However, she didn't

pursue the matter any further. Maybe she thought I wouldn't
answer any further questions.
***
I got on the train and arrived at the exit of the station

where we were to meet.
Enami-san hadn't arrived yet. I looked at the screen of my

phone, but there was no particular message. If I wait for her,
she'll come sooner or later.
About ten minutes later...
"There you are."
I heard a voice from behind my back. I knew immediately

that it was Enami-san's voice. The moment I turned around
to complain a bit about the tardiness, I swallowed my words.
I hadn't seen her in casual clothes in a long time. Not

since I was called out in the middle of the night some time
ago.
A high-waisted skirt and a navy blue knit. On top of that,

she was wearing a black coat.
She seemed to be dressed a little more stylishly than the

last time I saw her. I don't know much about women's
fashion, but it suited her so well that I unconsciously fell
silent.
I think that Sayaka also owned similar clothes. And yet,

the current Enami-san exuded a sexiness that transcended
that of a high school student. In fact, she was attracting the
attention of people walking in front of the station.
When I was silent for a while, Enami-san chuckled.
"Your mouth is open."
I rushed to cover my mouth with my hand. I was annoyed

because I knew I was being made fun of. But I didn't have
the heart to argue.
"How do you like it? It's been a while since I bought new
clothes."
It looks good. It's a totally different atmosphere compared

to normal."
"I see. Well, it was a bit expensive, but I guess it wasn't a
bad purchase."
I feel like Enami-san is in a better mood than usual today.

No, it was the same when we talked in the cafeteria. Maybe
Mother Enami's better mood is having a positive effect on
Enami-san as well.
"I've been working part-time, so I have a lot of money of

my own. Seeing that expression on your face made it worth
the expense."
"I was just a little surprised! What the hell..."
"Yeah, yeah."
I regretted that I had let my guard down. She looked so

proud of her victory.
Enami-san and I started walking side by side.
Our shoulders are almost touching each other. I found

myself getting a little nervous. I tried my best to keep my
expression down because I didn't know how much I would
be teased if I showed my feelings like this.
The tension was different from when I was alone with

Nishikawa.
I'm going to Enami-san's house alone with her. Realizing

this fact, I felt somewhat strange. I should be used to the
sight of Enami-san walking next to me, but the feeling of her
hair swaying and the warmth of her body transmitted
through the air was disturbing my brain.
In the opposite direction from when I usually go home. I

went through the usual T-junction at the fork and went
deeper into the city.
We were both silent for a while, but then Enami-san's

laugh suddenly burst out.
"W-What is it...?"
"No, it's nothing."
If I didn't open my mouth at this point, Enami-san would

call me a "virgin" again. I had a premonition that this would
happen, so I searched for an appropriate topic.
"How much work do you do now?"
It's a trivial topic, but since it was brought up a little

earlier, it shouldn't be uncomfortable.
"Hmm? Ah. I'm working three days a week, Monday,

Wednesday and Friday. I've decided to exclude the off days."
"Is that also why you're in a good mood?"
Enami-san's tiredness seemed to be receding from her

face. I thought she was quick to make a decision and then
execute it. I've only had one part-time job during a long
vacation, but I don't think I was in an atmosphere where I
could quit right away if I wanted to.
Still, it was really like Enami-san to forcefully move at her

own pace.
"Do I seem to be in such a good mood?"
"Don't you understand how grumpy you usually look...?"
When she is with me and Nishikawa, she is much better.
Even so, she was clearly less friendly than most people. Of
course, when it came to the rest of the people, she wasn't
even that sociable.
"That's an exaggeration. It's not like I'm like this for the
first time."
"But, still. I'm glad you've calmed down. When you had
that cold, Nishikawa was really worried about you."
"That's also an exaggeration. Well, I'm sorry that I

worried you guys."
"Geez..."
If she was always in such a good mood, it would be much

easier for me and Nishikawa. But maybe it's that I just don't
know, the original Enami-san might have been this kind of
person.
"Oh, yeah. Don't you have to do the shopping? I didn't

bring anything with me."
Without cooking utensils and ingredients, there was

nothing I could do. When I cleaned Enami-san's place
before, I threw away a lot of stuff.
"That's no problem. I've already bought everything. All we

have to do is make it."
"...What did you buy, by the way?"
"I bought rice, green onions, eggs... and other things I

might need. I have frying pans and pots."
"Condiments?"
"Salt, soy sauce, pepper, vinegar."
"Then no problem."
Maybe she looked up the recipe beforehand. If she bought

all the ingredients listed in the recipe, she couldn't have
made a mistake.
"Besides, I have a pretty good idea of what you plan to

make. I've made that dish many times before, so I'm
confident."
After failing once, I practiced a few times. Now, I can

make it without looking at anything.
"I'm glad to hear that... Because I have high hopes for

you."
But today, I'm just helping out. Enami-san is the one who
actually does the work. I can stop her if she tries something
strange, or even take over if something goes wrong. That
would be better for Enami-san as well.
Cooking is all about getting used to it. It may need some

skill, but anyone can learn to cook if they practice enough...
However, if you look at my family, there is a possibility that
it's wrong.
"By the way, Enami-san. Have you ever cooked before?"
"Do you think I have?"
"...I don't think so."
I can't imagine her standing in the kitchen. If anything,

she would look better lying down right in front of someone
who is doing the hard work of cooking.
"In fact, it's true. I've never even thought of cooking.
Basically, I buy food and eat it. I don't think I've ever even
held a knife."
"What did you do in home economics class? You're forced

to hold a knife there."
"It's something that kids who are proactive at it want to

do. If you just stare at them, they'll do it on their own."
"I wonder if that can be called proactive..."
Well, actually, just the mere fact that Enami-san gives a

daunting pose is very intimidating. If I were to say to such a
person, "Cut those stuff." I would imagine myself being cut
up.
"I'm really not good at that kind of thing. It requires a lot

of work right. All that peeling and chopping is insane."
"What about me, who does it every day!?"
"That's amazing. You must be a masochist."
"It's a necessary skill for at least one in a family. Did you

forget why I'm here today?"
"No, I haven't forgotten. It was just a joke."
Cooking itself is manageable once you learn to do it, but

whether you like it or not maybe a talent. In fact, Sayaka and
my father gave up on it halfway through.
"You're not going to continue to cook...?"
"Who knows..."
A vague reply. But it's not that she's not interested at all, I
guess. If she wasn't, she wouldn't have thought of cooking
for her mother like this.
"I guess I'll have to think about that as well from now on."
Her words were surprisingly positive. I think that Enami-

san herself feels that she can't go on like this. I'm only a little
involved, but it's up to her to solve the Enami family's
problems.
As a stranger, I can't go beyond a certain point.
"At least do it properly in home economics class from now

on, since home economics is only up to the second year."
"Eeh..."
"You've decided to take classes seriously. You have to take

home economics also seriously."
"Isn't this and that different things? I don't really like that
sensei."
"That's not the point."
By the way, the home economics teacher is a feeble-

looking woman. She is small in stature and wears large
glasses. She seems to flinch at the slightest complaint from
Enami-san.
"Well, can't help it... Next time, I'll at least wash the
vegetables."
"...That's enough."
Even if I were to say something strongly, I doubt anything
more could be said. I'm sorry, sensei...
If you go past the parking lot and turn the corner, Enami-
san's apartment is just around the corner. Thanks to the
many times I've walked past it, I know the route by heart. A
few stray cats were hanging out in front of a house. Maybe
they were being fed by the people who lived there.
"Cute."
"Eh?"
I mumbled, to which Enami-san replied with a look of

disbelief.
"...It's a cat. Isn't it cute?"
"I didn't misunderstand that. I mean, they're not cute at

all. They look dirty and I don't want anything to do with
them."
Being a stray cat, its hair was disheveled and dirty.

However, its beady eyes and occasional mewling sound were
not filthy at all.
"Why don't you understand? Nine out of ten people would

think it's cute."
"No, they won't. What are you talking about?"
"No, cats are creatures that everyone thinks are cute.

Nobody says cats are disgusting."
"When I leave the house in the morning, these guys creep

me out. I'm used to seeing them. I don't even know where
they get their cuteness from."
"It was stupid of me to expect that kind of sentiment from
Enami-san."
The moment I said those words, Enami-san lightly kicked

me in the shin. While I was holding my leg, Enami-san left
me behind and walked quickly into the entrance.
Just as the automatic door was about to close, I heard a

voice say, "Hurry up".
I let out a sigh.
I shouldn't have said anything unnecessary.
***
After catching up with her, I stepped into the Enami

house while talking about random things with her.
I always feel nervous when I stand at the entrance of the

Enami house. Is it because of the unique atmosphere? Or is
it because I'm not used to entering someone's house?
The hallway still had scars from that day. The surface of
the paint was peeling off.
"Eh? What's wrong?"
Enami-san gave me a suspicious look when I stopped

moving.
"No, nothing."
I quickly took off my shoes.
After all this time, it's amazing how far we've gotten. The
scene at that time was shocking.
The bloodshot eyes, the loud voice that seemed to
intimidate people.
And most importantly, she didn't care if she damaged the

hallway at all.
Compared to the despair I felt at that moment, I had

managed to rise considerably. It was the result of careful
step-by-step progress. Considering that the result could have
been very different with just one wrong button, I really felt
like patting myself on the back for a job well done.
Enami-san opened the door to the living room.
A chilly breeze touched my skin. Still, it wasn't that cold.

It was proof that the heating system was working properly.
However, apart from that, my body shivered a little.
—Hm?
My brain instantly felt some kind of discomfort. However,

I couldn't immediately recognize what it was.
But still, something was different.
I took a closer look at the inside of the living room.
There was hardly any garbage anymore. The kitchen, and

the rest of the house, was neat and clean. The tattered
furniture was still there, but I realized what it was when I
thought about it.
—Eh?
Why? I wondered.
For example, the lace curtains by the window. The top and
bottom were connected by a faint joint. But now it was
completely separated, and the lower part had fallen to the
floor.
And, the carpet on the floor. It should have been stretched

from one end to the other, but it is now curled up or turned
inside out.
Another example, on the dining table. There are pieces of

broken dishes scattered all over the place, even though
nothing was supposed to be there. All the pieces were
supposed to have been collected, which meant that they had
been broken anew.
Enami-san who was next to me seemed to have noticed

this as well.
"No way..."
Enami-san scrunched up her hair in irritation. Out of the

corner of my eye, I saw Mother Enami sleeping on the other
side of the dining table as usual. There is only one person
who would do such a thing.
And then, it happened.
"—Oh?"
Maybe she noticed our footsteps or the sound of the door

opening and closing.
From the back of the room, I heard the usual voice.
Shortly after, Mother Enami stood up. She was still

wearing her pajamas, and she approached me with a thin
shawl draped back over her shoulders.
Her expression. Her movements. The tone of her voice.
Everything was the same.
But I knew. A slight change in the living room. I knew it

was this person's doing.
I thought everything was going to be fine. It was the same

with this room. Since Mother Enami had been quiet for a
long time, and I could see her as a good mother, I had a
feeling that slowly and gradually, her state of mind would be
cleaned up.
It was just hubris. If it had been that easy to solve the

problem, Enami-san would have taken care of it on her own.
We kept moving forward and backward. There was no way

it was that easy to just move forward.
Mother Enami stood in front of me and smiled.
"Oh my. You're here again today, Naoya-kun."
"Yes. I'm sorry for coming without notice... I was

wondering how your health is..."
I think it was my instinct to be a good boy that allowed me

to respond so quickly.
"Fufu. I'm almost okay now. I think it's thanks to you

guys. My fever's gone down."
"I'm glad to hear that."
Enami-san beside me was silent. She looked puzzled by

the current situation.
The reason she had been in a good mood lately was that
she had been relieved of the emotional burden she had been
carrying. However, the signs of a relapse in mother Enami's
condition have made her earlier jubilant mood sink as if it
was a lie.
"That flashy kid is not here today, huh?"
"It's just me. I've been asked to do a favor for Enami-

san..."
"Oh, really? Is it about studying or something?"
"That's just the usual thing. Actually, it's..."
I didn't know how she would react, but I knew she

wouldn't be in a bad mood just because she found out.
So I said it.
"I'm here to teach her how to cook."
"Cooking? Eh? To Risa?"
"Yes."
It wasn't a particularly bad reaction.
It's just that studying has been replaced by cooking. As

long as she doesn't mind us using the kitchen, there
shouldn't be a problem.
"That's unusual. I can't believe Risa would ask you to do

that."
"That's not true. Enami-sa... Risa-san wants to cook for

mother."
Enami-san also looked at Mother Enami's face.
But still, the bad change did not happen. Her eyes
widened in surprise, but her face was soon overshadowed by
a smile.
"I've heard some good thing. I didn't know that at all.

Thanks, Risa..."
"It's nothing big..."
Looking away to the side, Enami-san said softly.
—What in the world is going on here?
Even though we were talking, it didn't seem like Mother

Enami was in a bad mood.
"I'm sorry. I think she's embarrassed. She's not a very

straightforward girl, but please get along with her."
"Yes. Well, I don't think she's embarrassed..."
"Really? Well, okay."
If I don't follow up on anything here, I don't know what

she'll say later.
Mother Enami withdrew to the back of the room, keeping

her calm expression on her face. The strength drained from
my body.
The human mind is not that easy to understand. I felt that

way once again.
"...What do we do?"
I asked, but I knew that there was no escape.

I had already told her that I would cook for her. It would
be unnatural to leave without doing anything.
"...Are you fine with this?"
"It doesn't matter if it's fine or not. It is what I'm here for
anyway. I don't really care that much about it."
"You're surprisingly bold."
Enami-san walked quickly towards the kitchen. It was

already past five o'clock in the afternoon. The winter solstice
was approaching and it was already dark outside the
window. In the dimly lit living room, the light in the kitchen
looked faint.
I followed Enami-san's lead.
In the kitchen, I found all the cooking utensils that

Enami-san had told me about. Frying pans, pots, knives,
cutting boards, seasonings, and so on. As far as I could see,
there was nothing that was missing. With this, I could start
cooking right away.
Enami-san wrapped a plain, mess-free apron around her

body. She offered one to me without saying a word, so I put
it on too. I wondered if she had bought two aprons because
she knew I was coming.
"I know the basic dish. But is there anything else you want
to make?"
"...To be honest, I haven't thought that far ahead. I've

prepared a variety of things we can use, but I don't know if
it's enough..."
She showed me the contents of her refrigerator.
The refrigerator did not look new, but it was clean and
polished. There weren't too many things in it, since she had
probably just started using it. Still, there were a few
vegetables of various kinds in the vegetable compartment.
"You're also going to eat the food we make, right, Enami-

san?"
"That's the plan."
"I see."
Of course, the main dish was for Mother Enami. However,

if I am going to cook at this time, it would be a shame to
cook for just one person. The food I'm going to make is not
the kind of food that Enami-san usually eats. So, I need to
prepare a regular dish as well.
"I understand now. Since I've got it all figured out, let's
make some basic dishes that might be useful in the future. I
think it will be better that way for Enami-san."
"Anything is fine."
I don't know Enami-san's skill. It's probably safer to make

it as simple as possible.
I quickly washed my hands. As expected, Enam-san seems

to have some common sense in this area. She washed the
cutting board, pots, and knives without me telling her to do
so.
Let's start with the first thing we decided to do.
"Do you have any rice?"
"Here."
She handed me a pack of rice. The kind that can be eaten
by using the cooker.
I put about two portions of it in the cooker first. It was a

little too much for her mother to eat, but even if there was
any leftover, it would not be much.
I took out some green onions from the vegetable room.
After washing them well, I put them on the cutting board.
"Now, let's cut them."
I let Enami-san take the lead.
It's not that difficult to cut green onions. As long as you

cut them into rounds, they will take shape.
"..."
After taking a deep breath, Enami-san grabbed the knife.

She seemed to be unaccustomed to it and stared at the flat of
the knife and the tip of the blade. A few moments later, she
grabbed the green onion with her left hand and slowly
lowered the knife with her right hand.
Tang.
She cut off the roots. As expected, she knew that she
couldn't eat it, so she pulled the root over to the edge of the
cutting board.
Tang, Tang, Tang.
Carefully, one at a time. But surely the green onions were

being cut at just the right size. She was following the "left
hand is the cat's paw" rule that we are taught in elementary
school, and her knife was moving back and forth.
It's a big difference from my family.
By the way, my father is deadly bad at using a kitchen

knife, he can't cut vegetables at all even though he moves
them up and down a lot. Sayaka is better than my father, but
she doesn't watch her hand very closely, so she often gets
dangerous.
Compared to that, I can say she is doing well enough.
After setting the knife down a few times, Enami-san

turned around.
"How much do you need?"
I peeked out from behind Enami-san.
"About double this amount."
"Okay."
The sound was regular and steady. I could feel her

seriousness.
"How about this much?"
"It's okay for now."
I gathered up the sliced green onions and put them in the

bowl. I washed the cutting board again and placed it on the
cooking table.
Just as the cooker rang, I took the rice out of it and

carried it to the edge of the kitchen.
"Phew, I'm tired."
"No, that was too fast!?"
"I don't use knives. I used up my spirit just by holding

these knives."
"Hmm. Well, that's how it is at first."
I didn't want to get too elaborate, so I decided that this

would be enough preparation for the first dish.
Next, I took out the other vegetables.
Cabbage, carrots, onions... these are the standard

vegetables that you would always use if you were cooking
normally. While I'm here, I wanted to teach her how to cut
these vegetables.
"Well, let's try making a vegetable stir-fry with these

three. Do you know how to do that?"
"...Maybe."
Enami-san picked up the onion first.
She flipped it over and pinched the tips, which worried

me, but eventually, she began to peel off the brown skin
from the surface.
I always cut off the tip and bottom before peeling, but it
doesn't matter which comes first.
Enami-san put the knife down after peeling off the surface
skin.
Perhaps this is not a matter of knowledge. She was
moving her hands as she thought about it. Even now, I think
she decided on the spot that she didn't need the skin on the
surface, or that she should cut off the roots.
Her intelligence was evident.
"Right."
Seemingly realizing that there was no particular place to

eliminate any more, she placed the washed onion on the
cutting board.
First, she cut it in half.
Then she picked up one of the halves and placed it cut

side down. She started from the edge and inserted the knife.
A chopping sound could be heard.
Finally, she had arrived at the right answer. Her hand was
a little unsteady, but it was good enough.
But, of course, a trap awaited her.
"My eye hurts!"
Enami-san's eyes were red. It was quite a rare sight. She

was holding her eyes with her left hand.
If it were me, I would be able to finish cutting quickly, so

it wouldn't be too hard. However, at Enami-san's current
pace, it would be quite difficult.
"Don't just stand there, help me."
"No, no, there's only one knife, right? There's nothing I
can do about it."
"This is annoying."
She still didn't ask me to take over.
After a few minutes or so, she finished cutting half of the

onions. We didn't need the other half, so she wrapped it in
plastic wrap and put it back in the fridge.
"Keep going, keep going. Next, let's go."
"Carrots, then."
After washing the carrots, she looked at them from above

and below, just like before.
"I see..."
As soon as Enami-san murmured this, she removed the

roots and stems. And then tried to shred the carrot.
At that point, I grabbed her arm.
"Stop!"
As expected, I guess. However, the fact that she didn't

know about this reaffirmed that she had indeed skipped
home economics class. In a corner of my memory, I
remembered the image of Enami-san standing at the edge of
the home economics room with her arms crossed.
"Aren't you forgetting something?"
"...No, I don't know. Tell me properly."
"The skin. You have to peel it."

Enami-san returned her gaze to the carrot.
At first glance, it was hard to tell that the carrot had skin.
I've heard that some people eat carrots with the skin on
them, but I think it's more common to peel them off. We
can't guarantee hygiene otherwise.
I grabbed the peeler and took the carrot from Enami-san.
I quickly peeled a little and showed her.
"Here, like this."
After receiving the peeler from me, Enami-san clucked

her tongue and began to move her hands in the same way I
did.
It's dangerous to put your hand under the peeler, so

caution is advised.
"Is this okay?"
She asked, showing me the skinless carrots. I nodded.
We didn't need all of it, so I cut it in half and handed

Enami the part we would be using.
"You really have a bad personality, don't you? You should

have told me beforehand."
"I'm sorry, I didn't think you're unaware."
"Did you say something?"
As you can imagine, she doesn't point a knife at me, but

it's quite destructive to be told that by Enami-san holding a
knife.
"All right, I'll teach you properly..."
There are many ways to cut carrots, but this time I

decided to teach her how to cut them into strips.
I stood right next to Enami-san and demonstrated.

Enami-san peered into my hand. After all this time, I've
realized that we're pretty close. I could almost hear her
breathing.
Long eyelashes. Her hair is flowing straight. I don't know

why I suddenly feel so nervous.
—This is an amazing situation, isn't it?
I'm visiting a girl's house, and we're cooking together. I

hadn't been in such a sensual mood before, so I hadn't paid
that much attention, but now that I'm standing beside her
like this, I'm aware of it all over again.
It was an indescribably peaceful and relaxing time.
It was getting darker and quieter outside the window.

There was no sound of the wind. The sound of the air
conditioner running, and the sound of Mother Enami
shifting her body was nowhere to be heard.
The only sound was that of the knife hitting the cutting
board.
"And, something like this, I guess."
She was looking at her hand without paying attention to

my expression, so she must not have noticed my
nervousness.
In fact, Enami-san was trying to recreate my technique
with a serious face.
So I forgot that I was in such a situation and focused on

teaching again.
"Yes, yes. Ah, that's a bit dangerous, so just go like this:.."
...This kind of situation is not so bad, I thought honestly.
Enami-san listened to what I said honestly. I, too, just

looked at the person in front of me and told her what she
needed to know, just like when I teach something to Sayaka.
Maybe, it is a little bit of fun.
Before I knew it, the onions, carrots, and even the cabbage
were all prepped and ready to use. Both Enami-san and I
paused to catch our breath.
The process went smoothly from there.
After laying out the oil, she put the vegetables in the pan
and cooked them while poking them with the chopsticks.
Sprinkling salt and pepper along the way, she placed them
on a plate before they burned.
This may have been Enami-san's first time cooking.
Since she cut all the pieces, they were unevenly shaped
and not quite the right size. But for a first-timer, it was
pretty good. I gave it a quick taste and found that the
seasoning was not bad.
"I guess it's at the level where you can make money out
of."
When I heard Enami-san's incredibly high self-evaluation,
I felt like I was going to collapse.
"No, it's not that good..."
"Really? Look, I think it can be sold for about 200 yen."
"Ah, but... if you push it in a different method, you might

be able to sell it for 1,000 yen or even 2,000 yen..."
"Don't say gross things."
Joking aside, I thought that 200 yen was about half the
cost of the ingredients. Vegetables are expensive these days.
To be honest, this is not enough for a side dish, so I

decided to add one more dish.
An omelet.
"Ah, yes, yes. All you have to do is break the eggs and roll
them up."
"Well, yes... but can you do it?"
"Who do you think I am?"
"I think you're Enami-san, who skipped home economics

and doesn't know how to peel a carrot."
"I can make stir-fry vegetables, so I can do it."
She seems to have gained a lot of confidence, but stir-

frying vegetables is super easy. It's not difficult to make an
omelet, but beginners often lose its shape.
...Can you crack an egg in the first place...?
The bowl is placed in front of Enami-san. Grabbing one of
the eggs, Enami-san lightly tapped it on the cooking table.
"Don't be nervous..."
"It's fine."
As soon as she tried to open the moderately cracked egg,

one of the shells flew in the wrong direction, causing the
contents to fall diagonally and off the bowl.
"...Tsk."
"Even if you click your tongue, it's clearly Enami-san

who's in the wrong!"
"I know. I'll do better next time."
I cleaned up the mess on the floor.
It's not as if Enami-san is going to fail again and again.

This time, she managed to crack it open. The yolk was still
intact. The other one was also well cracked.
It was stirred with chopsticks and put in the pan after

washing. Incidentally, there was no frying pan for frying
eggs in this house.
While heating over low heat, the Pan was back and forth,
left and right, and stretched the egg out thinly.
"...."
Enami-san was concentrating. Little by little, she began to

roll it out. But...
"Ah!"
There was a crack in the middle. From there, it gradually
lost its shape.
There was nothing I could do about it. The final result was
an egg omelet that had a certain shape but was clearly
misshapen.
"This is indeed unfit for sale..."
"Yeah, actually both of them."
I think this could be sold in a lot of quantities if it were

sold in a different way though.
And there was only one dish left to make.
"Phew..."
Unlike before, I could see a hint of nervousness on

Enami-san's face. That's because this dish is not for herself,
but for someone else to eat.
After bringing the water in the pot to a boil, the packaged

rice was put in. Stir it to prevent the rice from hardening. A
beaten egg and some green onions were also added.
While following my instructions, Enami-san was

somewhat absent-minded.
As she sprinkled the seasoning salt while being out of it, I

panicked and held her hand.
"Too much, too much."
"Ah, yes."
Enami-san must have had a lot of feelings about this dish.
Porridge is a standard dish served to the sick.
It was the first dish I made when I tried cooking for the
first time.
It was also not difficult to make. If I'm around, I'm sure it

won't fail.
But that's not the point.
"..."
Enami-san persistently moved her chopsticks in the pot.

Her eyes kept looking at the grains of rice dancing in the
water.
It was quiet.
The sound of the gas fire burning, the sound of the water
boiling, and Enami-san's breathing.
Reaching a certain level of culinary skill is one thing, but

being accepted by others is another.
Will she really eat it?
"Thank you, really."
She said in an unusually calm voice.
"I think I would have been in trouble if I had been alone.

In a lot of ways."
I'm sure it wasn't just about the food. It takes a lot of

courage to face something like this alone. At the very least, it
was an area that Enami-san had been running away from
until now.
"After all, cooking is tiring. But today, I think it was the
right thing to do. No matter how it turns out, I can say for
sure that it was necessary. It's better to face it head-on than
to do nothing at all..."
"I'll continue to be available for advice going forward

also."
"...Cheeky."
Gradually, Enami-san's true expression was shown to me.
It was the face of a normal high school girl, completely

different from the time when she had given off a frozen
stare.
Whenever I am shown this kind of face, I start to feel the

urge to see another expression. No matter how I try to cover
it up, it's an undeniable fact.
I think that's why I've gone along with Enami-san's

unreasonableness until now.
While we were talking, the porridge in the pot seemed to

have softened enough. I told Enami-san about it.
She gave a small nod. Almost an hour had already passed

since we started cooking.
The chopsticks were placed on the cooking table. The

bowls were taken out from the cupboard.
Then, Enami-san's hand reached for the knob of the stove.
I took off my apron and curled it up in my arms.
The fire on the stove, which had been flickering feebly,
had done its job and sluggishly retreated to the back of the
burner.
***
I thought back to the first time I cooked a dish and had

someone try it.
The sound of the spoon hitting the bowl. The tension as it

moved into the mouth. The tender moment.
From now on, Enami-san will experience the same

feeling.
Enami-san's long legs are moving forward little by little.
Perhaps because of the poor circulation of air, the closer

she gets, the more stagnant she becomes. I'm sure a lot of
things are swirling around in her head, but her pace didn't
slow down at all.
Mother Enami opened her eyes dazedly.
"Mom, here..."
On the tray was a bowl of porridge that Enami-san had

made. The steam was buried in the darkness.
"......Eh?"
At that moment, what appeared on Mother Enami's face

was a bewildered expression with no room to spare. Her
eyes were wide open, so wide that the whites of the eyes
stood out.
"Were you... serious?"
"I told you I was going to cook for mom right. Why are
you surprised?"
Mother Enami's back hit the cabinet. She frowned with an

"Ouch."
Then she touched her lips with her left hand.
"Perhaps, have you been asleep since then, Mom?"
"...That's right."
While we were standing in the kitchen, we didn't hear a

sound from Mother Enami's side.
"You want me to give this to me...?"
"That's what I've been saying. I wouldn't be the one to eat

it."
She placed the tray on the table.
The shawl that had been draped over Mother Enami's

shoulders slipped down. She pulled the quilt off her upper
body and peered at the porridge with trepidation.
It was a very ordinary porridge. Egg porridge. There were

chopped green onions on top of it.
"You need to get over this cold as soon as possible... You

haven't been able to eat much rice, so you need to get some
in your body... So I thought..."
"To think Risa cooked..."
It was made under my supervision, so there should be

nothing wrong with it. I've also confirmed that the taste is
fine.
"Sit down, Mom."
"..."
She was still stunned.
I start to feel a little uneasy. I wonder what Mother Enami

was thinking at the moment. I wonder if she's feeling
uncomfortable. It could be that what we did had the
opposite effect...
Eventually, Mother Enami sat down on a chair that had

probably not been used in years. The back of the chair was
unsteady, with her feet resting on the futon, but she didn't
seem to mind too much. Her eyes remained fixed on the
food in front of her.
Her hand moved slowly.
The spoon scooped up the porridge. It gradually

approached Mother Enami's mouth.
"...."
She put it in her mouth. She chewed with her lips opening
and closing in a small motion.
Then she swallowed.
"How is it?"
Enami-san asked anxiously, but Mother Enami did not

answer the question.
While she was eating, her expression didn't change much,
and I couldn't tell what she was thinking. However, she
didn't look angry or in a bad mood. It was clear that the
situation was not the worst.
Her hand started moving again for the next bite.
Porridge after porridge went into Mother Enami's mouth.

Each bite was small, so the pace of eating was slow, but the
bowl was definitely draining.
No one said a word for a long time.
All I could do was watch them.
I had already done all I could do. As an outsider, I could

only watch.
"...Surprisingly, you've done well."
When she had eaten about half of it, mother Enami said.
"That's obvious. I got help from the guy who always

cooks..."
"Thanks to Naoya-kun right?"
Then Mother Enami turned to Enami-san.
"Do you have any water?"
"I forgot. I'll bring it right away..."
Enami-san grabbed a two-liter plastic bottle from the

refrigerator. It was not tea, but mineral water. I think cold
water is bad for her health at the moment, but I guess it can't
be heated since she hasn't bought a new pot yet.
Mother Enami drank the water from a glass.
"Thank you."
As she put the porridge in her mouth, she coughed,

holding her mouth as if she had choked on it.
"Ah, geez..."
Enami-san rubbed her back.
In response, there was no sign of rejection from Mother

Enami. When she calmed down, she took another drink of
water and smiled, saying that she was fine now.
It seemed like she intends to eat it all.
...Maybe, just maybe.
I believed this was a great thing.
Because, Enami-san's body was trembling. Her legs, arms,

and lips were shaking in small increments.
It's not the face of desperation before cooking. Her body is

not able to control the range of emotions caused by the scene
in front of her.
Mother Enami and Enami-san don't express such things

in words.
They don't even show it in their expressions.
But I guess this is a tremendous change.
—Clang! A sound was heard.
The spoon was removed from Mother Enami's hand. The
bowl was empty. She exhaled loudly, her eyes staring up at
the ceiling.
"..."
At that moment, an emotion finally appeared on Mother

Enami's face.
I couldn't understand what kind of emotion it was right

away. She seemed to be smiling, but she was not. She was
not frowning.
It was a strange expression.
Joy, sadness, pain, anger, anticipation, relief, anxiety... I

tried to apply various words to her expression, but none of
them seemed to fit.
Eventually, I came up with a single word, and it just

clicked in my mind.
I don't know why I felt that way. It took me a long time to

come up with the word because I didn't understand it.
...I thought that this face definitely represented

"loneliness".
It was really good that she ate everything. But I don't

know if that change is a good thing or a bad thing. What I do
know now is that she has accepted Enami-san's feelings.
What will happen after that is up to Mother Enami from
here on out.
She reached for the glass again and drank some water.
Enami-san was just waiting for her words.
I, too, could do nothing but stand there, helpless.
"I'm tired."
That was the only word that finally came out of her
mouth. Enami-san seemed relieved and relaxed.
"Ah, then do you want to take a rest?"
"Yeah... I would like to rest."
"Okay."
She grabbed the dishes and headed for the kitchen to

escape. She was really scared. Avoiding eye contact as much
as possible, she began to wash the dishes.
"I envy you."
The sound of her voice was almost drowned out by the

sound of the water, but it still reached both mine and
Enami-san's ears.
"I'm tired already..."
Enami-san's hand stopped. The sponges that were

squeaking ceased to squeak.
"I'm really tired... I'm so tired and exhausted, I just want

to sleep forever."
"Mom..."
"Isn't it great? You don't have to worry about me

anymore."
Enami-san turned off the faucet. The sound of water

disappeared.
"It's good to be young. You can always get things back. No
matter what happens, the energy that comes from youth will
take care of it. Though it's already late, I knew this day
would come."
"..."
Enami-san's face remained downcast for a while.
"I'm not blaming you. I think it's natural. It's been a long
time. I wonder if it isn't strange that I stayed closed off till
now. Just like what you guys have been thinking."
"That's—"
I was about to argue with her, but then I realized that I

had no words to say about this.
It's true that I had always thought so. I wanted to find a

solution to what had happened in this house.
But then again, this person and I are the same.
We are bound by the wedge of the past. No matter how

hard I try to escape, no matter how much I know in my head
that I shouldn't drag it out forever, my body won't listen to
me. You can't free yourself from the reality that the past is
here and the present is there.
"It's a lie that one can't stay angry forever. Even if one can
forget, every time one remembers, hatred and pain will well
up. I want to get rid of those feelings, but my memory won't
let me. I'm getting tired of being controlled by these negative
emotions, and I don't care about anything anymore."
Mother Enami's eyes were closed.
The hand on her lap was clenched tightly. Her arms
trembled a little.
"It's not good for you to be like me, Risa."
She opened her eyes again and looked at Enami-san

standing in the kitchen.
"It's a bit lonely, but I'm really happy for you. That's what
I really feel."
And then she returned to that expression again.
It was the same lonely expression she had when she was
looking up at the ceiling.
Finally, I felt like I understood part of Mother Enami's

feelings.
She's already given up.
She gave up trying to escape her past a long time ago. In

the past, Enami-san had been the same, and they had both
been looking in the same direction. But now Enami-san had
decided to move on.
It was a farewell, Mother Enami sensed.
"You've had a good encounter. Take good care of it."
After that, she shut her mouth.
No one could say anything.
Enami-san placed the dishes in her hands in front of the

sink, and last year's desktop calendar, which must have been
left there for a year, fell over.
Enami-san was stunned. I guess she never thought she
would be hearing something like this.
The purpose of cooking this time was to cheer up Mother

Enami. It wasn't to tell her that they were parting ways.
Instead of cheering her up, she must have felt frustrated
when she saw her mother's back curling up more and more.
"No, that's wrong. I'm just trying to give mom a little

nourishment..." Enami-san said.
"It doesn't matter either way. All I know is that I've

figured it out."
"You don't understand anything. I did it for my mom, and

I thought I made it with the intention of us working hard
together from now on."
"I'm sorry, Risa. I can't get rid of the hatred I have for that
person."
Mother Enami looked around the entire living room.
When I arrived here, the situation was even worse. The

curtains, the carpet, the tabletops, the broken furniture. In
the end, it was only cleaned, but not fundamentally fixed.
The words from earlier and the scene in front of me must

be the same.
"That's why, you know. You're the only one who can do
something about it. This is the only thing I can say to you."
Then she smiled a little.
It was a smile that was clearly straining.
"I see."
Enami-san said quietly, her shoulders slumping.
She resumed washing the dishes. The sound of the water

coming out of the faucet could be heard. The fact that she is
scrubbing the same spot over and over again suggested that
she was still upset.
I was lost. I wondered if I should leave it like this. I was a

stranger, but I wondered if I could say something from my
own experience.
As if this was the end of the conversation, Mother Enami

pulled out her chair. At that moment, I couldn't control
myself anymore.
"Please wait."
She stopped at the halfway position she was in, as she was
standing up.
Then, Mother Enami looked at me dubiously.
...If I miss this opportunity, I won't be able to say

anything to Mother Enami. I won't be able to face my own
mother anymore. Even though I and others are not the
same, I still wanted to avoid the rupture between Enami-san
and her mother.
"Is it so bad to look back?" I said.
Perhaps it was an unexpected comment, but Mother

Enami seemed a little surprised. She put her hands on the
backrest and stared at my face intently. Suddenly I felt
nervous.
"Ah, no. I'm sorry for the suddenness. But I feel that
moving forward and shaking off the past are two different
things."
Even as I talk, I realize that I had this idea in my mind.

Even when studying, there is a feeling of organizing your
thoughts in your head when you put them into words to
teach someone else. The feeling I had now was similar to
that.
My jumbled thoughts began to take a clearer shape.
"Enami-san's mother said, 'You don't have to worry

about me anymore.' I think it is true that Enami-san has
started to look forward to the future. But that doesn't mean
that she's stopped caring about the past or that she's trying
to go her separate ways."
"...You're so young."
Her gaze changed to the same one she had given Enami-
san earlier.
"Really, if you keep dwelling on the past, you'll never be

able to look forward."
"I don't think so."
Mother Enami furrowed her brow at my clear tone. I may

have offended her. But I felt that my idea was not wrong.
"The present me is an extension of the past. There is no

escaping that reality. No matter how hard I try to forget, it
will always remain in my memory. The more you try to
forget it, the more you will remember it again and again, and
it will be etched in your mind."
"That's right."
Mother Enami spat out with a sigh.
"That's why it's impossible."
She stood up from her chair and walked up to me. Her

eyes narrowed. A smile on her cheeks alone, as if she was fed
up.
"Maybe you don't understand, but..."
"Maybe so..."
The situation between me and the Enami family is

different. I don't even know how the word "hatred" came to
be uttered.
"But then again, maybe not..."
On the other hand, I didn't think there was any kind of

overlap at all.
I've had some tough times in the past too... A time when I
was in so much pain, suffering, and on the verge of breaking
that I thought I would never recover..."
At that moment, for some reason, Enami-san's shoulders

shook. Then she hugged her own shoulders as if to cover it
up. Her eyes are looking in another direction.
I continued.
"Every day, I stayed home and didn't go to school. I

couldn't even eat my food, my head was screaming, I
couldn't even cry anymore, and I thought I was going to die."
I didn't know what kind of expression I had on my face
right now. I was embarrassed to show my face, so I turned
my head away.
I tried my best to squeeze out my voice.
"But then one day I noticed..."
Hands reached out to me from two of them. Little by little,

I was able to stand up.
"...I realized that maybe there are things I can do because

I have been through such a past. I can't go back to the way I
used to be, but I can accept the past and do the best I can so
that I will never regret it again. When I had a new purpose, I
felt a little better. At the time, though, I didn't think I was
moving forward... Looking back, I think that was the
moment I finally took the first step."
"..."
Mother Enami listened to me in silence.
"I couldn't shake off the past, but I learned that I could
use it to energize myself to move forward. The pain didn't go
away, but I was able to gradually create a new me."
I don't even know if this way of doing things is the right

way. Eventually, I might get overwhelmed, and the time
might come when I break down.
But at that time, I had no other choice.
"That's why, um..."
Suddenly, no words came out.
The anxiety of wondering if it was really okay to say such a
thing came to my mind. All of it got mangled up again.
I'm always in doubt. Whenever I try to come to a

conclusion, I stop thinking.
It's pathetic. It's really pathetic.
Despite all my bravado, I'm still a mess. My mouth got

dry, and my throat hurt when I swallow. My forehead was
sweating.
I glanced over to check on Mother Enami.
She had a serious expression on her face, different from

before.
I suddenly remembered the time I had lectured Enami-

san at the diner.
It was a different kind of look, but I had a feeling that the

roots of it were similar.
After a while, Mother Enami opened her mouth.
"......I see."
Sorry. I apologized to Enami-san in my heart. Perhaps I

might have made a mistake.
"Um..."
The backs of my eyelids start to ache. My navy blue socks

wriggled with the movement of my feet.
I wondered if I had annoyed her. Even if it's something

you think is right, whether you should tell them is another
matter. I let my momentum get the better of me, but I've
already lost that urge.
I felt a strong gaze around my temples, but I couldn't

seem to look up anymore.
That's when I saw Mother Enami's feet approaching mine.

Despite the cold weather, she was barefoot. Her pale veins
were standing out.
"I think I kind of get it..."
I couldn't react to the voice pouring down on me.
"Raise your head..."
Fearfully, I did so. I took a deep breath and lifted my eyes.
I'm sure I have a terrible expression on my face right now.
"I wonder if you talked to Risa in that way?"
"...?"
"I bet... you're the one who changed Risa, aren't you?"
I realized that almost two months have passed since then.

The past two months have been a strange time for me. The
same goes for the cleaning of the Enami house. It was the
first time I had ever cared so much about someone else.
I'm not vain enough to believe that my words have power.

Somehow, I never thought that my words would have the
same effect as the sermon that changed Enami-san's life. But
since I knew that accumulation could move people, I had no
choice but to do nothing.
Enami-san also came back from the kitchen.
"As I thought, it is like that huh..."
She sat back down in her chair as if she was going to fall
down. There are several gray hairs mixed in with her hair. I
asked her if she was okay.
But she didn't answer, instead looked at the desk calendar

on the kitchen counter that Enami-san had knocked over
earlier.
On her lap, one hand wrapped around the other.
"How long has it been... I don't even know that

anymore..."
I don't know the past that Enami-san and her mother

share.
"It's all broken. And I often compare the before and after
of the broken. Comparison is probably the cruelest act in
life. It shows you exactly what you're missing. And we try to
seek what we can't have anymore..."
I know the feeling.
"I'm always thinking... I always wonder how good it would

be to go back to the way it was before it was destroyed.
When I think about it, my heart starts to ache and my head
starts to hurt. I try to do my best, but then I suddenly have
flashbacks to the past..."
"Yes..."
"I wonder if I'm really in the right place. When I stand

alone, I feel uneasy. At that time, my mind becomes
surprisingly empty. When Risa goes to school, I'll be alone,
right? I thought about it a lot. I had plenty of time to think
about it..."
Furthermore, Enami-san began to distance herself from

her mother more and more. So, it was an even more difficult
time for her.
"I'm sure that in that sense, Risa and I are different..."
Finally, her gaze came back to me.
When Enami-san said, "Mom." she shook her head.
Does this mean that it's impossible after all? Do I have no

choice but to give up?
Perhaps it was the sincerity of my words, but she was

talking to me in a very serious manner.
That's why I can't help but realize that this is what Enami-
san's mother really feels.
"As I said earlier, youth is really precious... The older you
get, the more entrenched your thoughts become..."
"Yes..."
"I don't think I'm ready to throw everything away and

start all over again..."
It was her earnest feeling. It made me feel even more

hopeless.
Even if she hadn't said so, I'm sure she'd already tried to
move forward many times. Each time, she faltered, and now
she is stuck here. No matter how much I encouraged her, it
was meaningless...
What if I never see her again? I'm sure that this person
will continue to live in the past... I had such a premonition.
When I was about to give up, she said to me—
"—But... thank you."
"Eh?"
For a moment, my body froze.
I was surprised.
I had never expected to be thanked.
I opened my mouth in a dumbfounded manner.
Did she say thank you? No way...
I couldn't believe my ears, but Enami-san had the same

reaction.
And that's not all. Mother Enami was smiling at me.
"..."
I wondered if this was the best she could do in response to

my words. It's not that she dismissed my words as unworthy
of being heard. Even if I couldn't change her, she might have
accepted my words.
I was honestly happy.
"N-No..."
"Thank you so much, for doing this for someone like

me..."
It's not easy to move forward while carrying the past. I

don't expect her to look forward right away, either.
But it's a sign. Even if it is a very small thing, it does not

mean that this is meaningless. If there is even a small gain
for Mother Enami, there is a possibility that she will reach
her ultimate goal.
It won't be all good in the future. She seems to be calm

now, but it is possible that things will get rough again soon.
I don't think the day will come when the hatred will
completely disappear from Enami-san's mother.
There is a good chance that we will never reach the goal I

want.
Even if that's the case, this is good for now.
It's fine to go little by little. I think that's enough.
Without any hope, I don't know what direction I should
aim for. But if there is a sign, we can move toward it. No
matter how slow it is.
A heat slowly builds up in my chest.
"...Please let me say thank you, too. Thank you very

much."
Before I realized it, I said so.
Both Enami-san and her mother gave me a puzzled look.

They wouldn't understand why I was thanking them.
But this conversation was very meaningful to me.
Maybe the broken furniture should be left as it is. I felt a

little more confident in myself.
"What a strange kid... Cough..."
Coughing, Mother Enami turned her head away.
It was not a failure. I was really glad that I had talked with
her.
"I'm sorry..."
"No, it's fine..."
Mother Enami closed her eyes.
"...I'm tired."
When she said that, I realized that I had been here too
long. It's getting late, and it's going to be a nuisance.
"Um, sorry. I should be leaving soon..."

"Yeah. You should do that."
It's already 7:30. I have my own things to do.
I said my last goodbyes and started getting ready to leave.
As I left the living room and was putting on my shoes at

the entrance, Enami-san approached me from behind.
"You..."
She stood at an angle, looking at me sideways.
"What?"
I tapped my toe and pushed my feet into the back of my

shoe before standing up. Enami-san exhaled, squirming on
her feet.
"About what you were saying today..."
Her voice was quieter than usual. I waited in silence for

her to continue, but she never did. After a while, Enami-san
mumbled,
"...No, it's nothing."
"...?"
She pinched her lips between her fingers and made a

troubled face. I wondered what was going on. She had taken
the trouble to talk to me. In the end, Enami-san just said,
"Thank you for today," and left.
As usual, she never explained her thoughts. I could only

nod my head.
***
I should stop delaying my conclusions by concealing
what's in my heart.
That's what I was thinking.
Fujisaki probably mustered up the courage to tell me how

she felt. But it's unfair that I'm the only one who stays in the
safe zone and keeps quiet.
Tomorrow. The day I go to karaoke with Fujisaki and

Sayaka.
I've decided to tell her everything.
About the past. What I've been struggling with. After that,
I'll clearly state my conclusion.
For a long time, I had thought that my feelings should not

be known. I didn't want people to know how ugly I am. But
maybe that was the wrong choice.
With such determination, I welcomed the next day... or

was supposed to.
But it didn't work out that way. And there was a reason for
that.
***
"—Cough, cough."
The morning came. I was lying in bed, coughing.
I covered my mouth with my hand and sniffled.
My vision was blurry. I couldn't get my head off the

pillow.
My body shuddered.
—Damn it.
My throat hurts. I tried to sit up, but I felt a strong

resistance to getting out of bed.
I was definitely not feeling well. Considering what I've

been doing, I think it was probably transferred to me from
Enami-san or her mother. I was confident that I could take
care of myself, so I was confident that I would be fine.
It had been years since I had been sick.
At least, I don't think I've gotten sick since my mother

died. I washed my hands and gargled every day and
disciplined myself to lead a regular life. I cooked nutritiously
and tried not to eat between meals.
—I let my guard down.
No matter how much I pay attention to my health when

it's not good, it's not good.
Making breakfast. Going out with Sayaka. To meet with

Fujisaki and talk about various things. I thought of all the
things I should do today, but I didn't feel like I could do any
of them.
In the end, I decided to leave the housework to my father

and Sayaka.
I felt guilty regarding Fujisaki and Sayaka, but I had to let

them go by themselves today.
***
Sayaka came to my room about half an hour before the
appointed time.
"...I've already informed Fujisaki-san."
She changed into her casual clothes. The purpose of the

karaoke was for Sayaka and Fujisaki to meet. Even if I'm not
there, there's no reason to cancel.
I nodded once.
"Sorry... Please apologize to Fujisaki for me."
"I don't mind. I mean, it's really bad timing, isn't it?"
"It hurts to hear you say that..."
You are not going to blame me for this, though, are you?
"You guys have fun today. Don't worry about me, okay?"
"I know... Then I'm off."
After saying that, Sayaka left my room.
I picked up the smartphone that I had left by my bed.

Then, I opened the line and typed a message.
Naoya Ookusu: I'm sorry. I'm sure you've heard from

Sayaka, but I've got a fever. I'll make it up to you for this
some other time.
My head feels fuzzy.
It was hard to look at the screen. As soon as I saw that it
had been sent, I immediately put down my phone.
I closed my eyes.
***
...How long has it been since I've taken a full day off?
Since that incident four years ago, I've been trying to keep
myself in check. I've been studying and doing chores single-
mindedly so that I wouldn't have to think about anything
else. If I had time to relax, I went to my desk. It was easier
for me that way.
The time I spent awake and asleep was repeated

frequently.
Sleepiness and pain were mixed together.
The muscles in my legs and arms relaxed. My senses were

foggy and I couldn't tell if I was awake or asleep.
The sound of shaking paper on the wall.
The warm breeze from the heater. A film of tears slowly

spreading behind my eyelids.
Little by little, the tug of war between drowsiness and

suffering shifted towards drowsiness.
Time was flowing slowly. The sound of my breathing

gradually faded away.
Just as I was about to lose consciousness, I suddenly

heard the sound of a door opening with a crack from the
back of the room.
—?
I half opened my eyes and turned to look at it. But I

couldn't focus.
There's someone near the door.
—Who is that?
Just one person. Standing there, looking at me.
A straight back. White skin covered the face and arms.
I strained my eyes. The focus was unstable, like when you

move a magnifying glass up and down.
That person was approaching me with a relaxed gait. The

figure reflected in my blurry vision was neither Sayaka nor
my father. When that person stood close to me, I noticed
that the thing covering her lower body was a skirt.
I could almost reach this person if I reached out. But I still

didn't know who it was.
I heard a voice.
(Ho... are..)
But I couldn't discern what was being said.
I opened my mouth to answer something, but all that

came through my airway was a thin breath.
(Thi... is... men...)
The words continued. I listened, puzzled.
I don't know who it is, but they've entered this room. The
room was a mess of papers and study materials. I didn't
want anyone to know that I was studying in this kind of
place. However, the person in front of me didn't seem to
care about that.
Disjointed words were intermittently delivered to my

ears.
(at... and when...)
Despite my will, my consciousness became even more

distant.
The figure of the person standing in front of me was faint.

I tried my best to gather my scattered consciousness and
focus my eyes. The face looked flat, but I could see the color
of the hair. It's brown. It reached up to the shoulders.
Who is this? My head was not functioning properly. The

voice continued to speak. I couldn't understand what it was
saying, but I felt comfortable with the sound of it. It sounded
soft and gentle.
Sunlight was floating on the side of the bed. The sound of

her voice lulled me further into sleep. The sick feeling I had
felt earlier seemed to disappear. I have to say something.
Such a sense of mission is crushed by sleepiness. That voice
became more and more fluffy and blurry. My eyelids were
gradually covering my vision.
I was at the end of my limit. The thread of my

consciousness was about to break.
At the last moment. Just as my eyelids were about to

close, a question mark appeared in my mind.
For a brief moment, I could see the person's face clearly.
It was the same face I had seen so often lately, but with a
different, gentler expression, speaking to me.
I called out to her without sound.
—Enami-san...?
***
How long had I been asleep? Suddenly my consciousness

surfaced and I came back to myself.
I opened my eyelids.
And sat up.
It was quiet. The scene before I fell asleep seemed to be a

lie. There was no one there.
—Huh?
It was evening. Outside the window was reddish, and the

leafless branches were swaying in the wind.
I was in my room. It didn't look like someone had

intruded. Wiping the sweat from my eyes, I looked at the
empty space in my room.
There were no traces of anything.
Even my memory was fuzzy.
Only a faint residue of memory told me that someone had

been here.
I held my head with my right hand.

...Was it a dream? Was it an illusion that was shown to
me unconsciously because I just couldn't distinguish
between slumber and wakefulness?
Because there's no way that could have happened. There

was no way Enami-san would go out of her way to check on
me when I had a cold. In the first place, she doesn't know
that I have a cold.
Thinking about this, I felt a little calmer.
It seemed that I was feeling a little better. The chill had

diminished considerably.
The moment I left the room, I ran into Sayaka. She

seemed to have just come home and was still dressed in her
casual attire.
"Ah, shitty brother..."
"...That was surprisingly quick. Did you have fun?"
"Yes."
Sayaka pressed her hand against my forehead. Then she

frowned, "You're still warm".
"Still it has improved a lot. What about Fujisaki?"
"No, nothing particular. She was worried about you. But

she was hoping the three of us could go together next time."
"I see... That's right. I'll have to make it up to her."
"It's not like you had a choice. Well, I'm going to

change..."
She quickly left, as if she did not want to catch my cold. It
was a natural reaction. I went downstairs, moistened my
mouth with water, and went back to my room.
I grabbed the phone that I had left on the bed. I opened

the screen, but there were no notifications.
—By the way...
I remembered that I had sent a line message before going

to bed.
I wondered if she had already replied.
I open the line. But no one had contacted me. Fujisaki had
a habit of returning messages as soon as possible, so I guess
she just hadn't noticed yet.
And then I tilted my head.
—Hm?
A strange feeling. And I knew immediately what it was.
...The message I was supposed to have sent today was

missing.
Before I went to bed, I apologized to Fujisaki through a

message. I'm pretty sure I did.
I opened and closed the message several times, but it still

didn't appear. I wonder if even that was a dream.
As soon as I closed the conversation history and tried to

put the phone to sleep, I realized something.
"Sorry. I'm sure you've heard this from Sayaka..."
The sentence as I remembered it was displayed at the top
of the screen.
I noticed a certain fact as well.
...That message was addressed to Enami-san.
My thoughts froze. Immediately, I couldn't grasp the

situation myself.
In a panic, I opened the conversation history.
Naoya Ookusu: I'm sorry. I'm sure you've heard from

Sayaka, but I've got a fever. I'll make it up to you for this
some other time.
No matter how many times I looked at it, the reality

remained the same. It was sent to Enami-san, not Fujisaki.
Indeed, my consciousness was wandering. Anyway, I was

so busy making the text that I couldn't even check who it was
sent to. Did my fingers choose Enami-san's account instead
of Fujisaki's?
It was already read. That means Enami-san read my

message.
A different kind of sweat came to my face, one that I

hadn't felt when I was sleeping.
I felt the need to tell her that I made a mistake, but at the
same time, my thoughts started to move in a different
direction. About what happened today. I've been thinking
about the dream-like event...
—Don't tell me...
She shouldn't have known about the cold. However, I

think that Enami-san must have learned about it from this
message.
It all makes sense. Was it really real? Did Enami-san

really come to my house?
—But...
One question came to my mind.
There was something I couldn't understand.
It was after that sermon that I started to get involved with

Enami-san. Before that, we had never even had a
conversation. It's not like we were close when we were kids.
To begin with, it was only in high school that Enami-san and
I started being in the same school building.
—How did Enami-san know where I lived?
No matter how much I thought about it, I couldn't get an

answer to that question.
I couldn't even find a clue.
From outside the window, I could hear the laughter of

children.
It was Sunday. A winter evening. The room was getting

colder and colder.
All alone, I sat on my bed and pondered endlessly.
SS 01: Karaoke Date between Sayaka Ookusu and
Shiori Fujisaki
—Like he is an idiot.
That's what I thought when I saw my brother apologizing

with a serious face for catching a cold for the first time in
years. He had a fever of over 38 degrees Celsius and was
shivering with cold, wrapping a blanket around himself,
sniffing, and coughing a few times against the wall. He
seemed to be worried about his bad timing, and I knew he
was feeling apologetic as he narrowed his eyes.
—Seriously, what an idiot!
It's not that I want to blame my brother for catching a

cold. It's not that I wanted him to apologize to Fujisaki-san
either.
I was just a little worried.
Since his mother died, my brother has changed. He

started to do his chores and study at full speed, to the point
of breaking his body. I don't blame him, nor do my father.
But he was working as if someone was blaming him as if he
was being driven to the edge.
"Sorry... please apologize to Fujisaki for me."
That was the first thing that came out of his mouth.
It may not be my place to say this, as I've already changed

my clothes, but I couldn't help but feel sorry for him as he
tried to take care of everything on his own.
It was this feeling that made me say these words to him.
"I don't mind. I mean, it's really bad timing, isn't it?"
"It hurts to hear you say that..."
His voice was getting fainter and fainter. My brother, who

is known for his weakness, seems to be able to cope with the
sarcasm. I felt sorry for my brother, and the word "stupid"
kept running through my mind.
In the end, I think my brother is and always has been too

serious.
There is no doubt that my brother bears some

responsibility. However, there is no one in this house who
blames my brother. My relatives, who only discuss things
from afar, don't get involved in our family in any particular
way.
My brother did his best even when things were rough.

Like a rubber band being pulled and popped, he was
throwing back the repercussions of his days of studying with
such passion in the form of fights.
The word "cut corners" is probably not in my brother's

dictionary.
Even now, while carrying a cross on his back, he is

cramming in so much housework and studying that he
doesn't even have time to sleep.
...I am the exact opposite of my brother.
I cut corners where I can. I don't have the word "all-out"

in my dictionary. In the full marathon that is my life, I have
been walking slowly except for the 10 or 20 km milestones.
Even when I do run once in a while, I never push myself if I
feel tired. I just look sideways at people like my brother who
keep giving it their all, thinking how hard it must be.
"You guys have fun today. Don't worry about me, okay?"
My brother said with a fake smile on his face.
I swallowed all my frustration and annoyance with the

person in front of me and opened my mouth.
"I know... Then, I'm off."
I felt a tug at back, but I turned on my heel without

hesitation. I closed the door and leaned against it, taking a
deep breath.
—I am also an idiot, worrying about something like this.
***
"Sayaka-chan."
When I arrived at the meeting place, I saw a person

waving at me with a cute smile.
Shiori Fujisaki-san.
Unbelievably, she seems to be my brother's friend...
I've only known her for about a month, but I think she's a
very attractive person.
"Sorry..! Did I keep you waiting?"
"No, I just got here too..."
...Ah, this smile heals me.

She has a face so well-rounded that even I, a woman, can't
help but fall in love with it. Her face is pure and innocent. I
would like to thank my brother for getting to know this
person.
"Wow, Sayaka-chan. Your casual clothes are stylish. You

look very mature."
"Is that so?"
"Yeah! I think it's really nice."
I pinched the bottom of my skirt. It was worth the effort

to pick out an outfit that wouldn't make me look strange in
front of Fujisaki-san. I also liked the white fur coat that I had
recently bought.
"You look really really cute... Fujisaki-san."
"Nothing like that. I'm just dressed for the occasion."
...Ah, this casual wear is also soothing.
It's not that they are particularly fashionable. They are

fairly simple clothes, I think.
A pale red chester coat. On her feet, you can see her
beautiful legs wrapped in black stockings.
But this simplicity, combined with Fujisaki-san's gentle

atmosphere, was really nice.
I mean, how can Fujisaki-san look so cute with almost no

makeup on?
"Is Ookusu-kun... I mean Naoya-kun, okay?"
"He's fine. It'll go away if he just sleeps. It's not worth
worrying about."
"I see..."
I had expected to be asked. To my great surprise, Fujisaki-

san seems to have a crush on my brother. This conclusion
was based on a hundred times of suspicion, so I was sure of
it.
Even now, the desire to rush to my brother's side is at the

forefront of her mind.
—Shitty brother, why don't you just straighten up?
She is an impeccable person. Even as a woman, I can see

that she has the perfect personality and appearance. I don't
want them to get together, considering the future of
Fujisaki-san. But since I have no reason to interfere, I can
only secretly support her.
"...I talked to my brother before I left. He asked me to give

a message to Fujisaki-san: 'I'm very sorry I couldn't make it
today. I'll make it up to you. If you don't mind if it's just the
two of us, let me make plans sometime.'"
"J-Just the two of us?"
Of course, the "just the two of us" part was a lie. But if I
didn't force him to go on a date with her, I couldn't see a
future where the two of them would get together. I don't
think it's hasty, considering that I have to separate him from
the super beauty that is Enami-san.
"Why did Ookusu-kun suddenly say something like that?"
"Huh? Aren't Fujisaki-san and my brother dating?"
"That's not true!"
If I were to describe Fujisaki-san's current state in a

cartoonish way, I would say that she has whirlpools in her
eyes and steam coming out of her head. In reality, though,
she's just swimming her eyes and having her face turn bright
red.
Even though she's such a cute person, I still don't

understand my brother who doesn't make things clear with
her.
"I only told you this because my brother asked me to. If

you want to know more, you should ask my brother
directly."
I'll make sure to get my brother to align with this later.
"Thank you, Sayaka-chan."
"It's nothing."
As someone who is lying to support Fujisaki-san, I can't

accept her gratitude honestly.
"Even if you're not dating, I would love it if my brother

and Fujisaki-san would get along in the future. He's such an
irrepressible brother, and I think he needs someone as
sensible and kind as Fujisaki-san to be able to control him."
"Control? ...I think Ookusu... Naoya-kun is very decent."
"No, no..."
It's true that he's getting better on the outside. However,

my brother is a dangerous person who can go out of control
if left unchecked. He treats me like a child, but there are
many aspects of him that I don't understand as a brother.
"You'll understand soon. Anyway, why don't we get

going?"
"Ah, yes! Then, let's see, that way!"
After we finished talking about my brother, we headed to

the karaoke bar. I was still nervous about going to the
karaoke bar with Fujisaki-san.
We went to a chain karaoke store, where I often go with

my friends. It doesn't have a large variety of songs, but they
have a good selection of sweets and the prices are
reasonable, so I find it very useful.
After completing the check-in procedures, we went to the

designated room on the third floor.
"It's cold, so I'll turn on the heat."
"Thank you. I'll take your coat. I'll hang it up for you."
Underneath her coat, Fujisaki-san was wearing a white

turtleneck knit. But when she wears it, she looks so
adorable.
"What kind of songs do you usually sing, Fujisaki-san?"
"Um, I tend to sing older songs than other people."
She smiles embarrassedly. Moe.
"My father often plays songs that were popular in the

past. That's how I came to listen to those songs. I'm not
familiar with the latest popular songs."
"So, something like Z〇RD or T〇F...?"
"Ah, of course, those too! Sayaka-chan is also familiar

with them, huh?"
"My father also listens to them a lot..."
However, in the case of my father, it is because I am

forced to listen to a lot of bad humming. I don't want to
listen to the old songs myself.
"The group I like the most is called WAN 〇 S. Do you

know them, Sayaka-chan?"
"I've heard of them... But my father only listens to female

artists."
He seemed to have been a fan of Mo 〇 's and talked

enthusiastically about how great they were in their prime.
"So you know about E〇T and kir〇ro?"
"Of course. I mean, I don't think those are too old."
"Surprisingly, there are many girls who don't know about

the... I'm glad you know about it, Sayaka-chan! If that's the
case, I won't hesitate to add my favorite song."
"I can sing later, so please put your choice in first."
"Is that okay? Then I'll choose first."
After a while, "Love Love Love" by Drea〇m appeared on

the screen. It was a famous song that I knew too. The sound
of a harpsichord or some such instrument sounded subdued
and gradually combined with the sounds of various
instruments to form a distinctive melody. Fujisaki-san
grasped the microphone with both hands and began to sing.
"..."
I'd heard the lyrics so many times on TV and video sites

that even I, who wasn't that familiar with the song, could
sing along. I reconfirmed that it was a good song, but at the
same time, I had a strange nagging feeling.
Maybe it's because I feel like I understand her feelings.
Fujisaki-san's singing voice was clear. She didn't use

vibrato, shuffling, or any other unnecessary techniques. She
was just singing along with the music that was playing.
That's why I feel as if I can feel the emotion in her voice.
"..."
I fiddled with my hair on the side of my head and listened

to her voice as it drifted by.
Somehow.
I think I like Fujisaki-san a lot more than I thought I did.
Her smile.
Her gentle voice.
The way she says I'm a very good girl.
I like everything. I admire people like her, and I want to

spend more time with her.
The song was already coming to an end. I think it's time

for me to put on a song, so I reach for the touchscreen.
I want Fujisaki-san to be able to achieve that love, even if
it is for a brother like that.
I want to see more of her happy face.
So you'd better get a grip.
—You stupid brother.
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Chapter 01: School Attendance

(LN) Shiori Hanasaki -> (WN) Shiori Fujisaki. Possible

There was a ripping sound.

There was a resounding sound as she ripped it off my face.

In her hand, there is a bandage that has been removed.

The school uniformed Sayaka reached for another

"Oww ow... You're relentless, you know that?"

The living room of the house. I and Saika were sitting on

Well, it's crazy to think that three plasters are so few.

"You don't have to put them up here anymore, do you?"

I took out my phone and looked at my face.

The swelling around my eyes had already subsided. For a

It was embarrassing to go to school with a bandage on my

"Not yet. It's definitely better, but it's not perfect."

"It's fine already."

...It had already been almost a month since I was injured.

It was the middle of November. Because of the chilly

I haven't had any problems since then. I don't have to deal

The morning sun was shining through the window. The

My father, who was eating his breakfast at the dining

"Hey. The tamagoyaki in the meal is too salty today."

As usual, you are complaining a lot. I thought. I

"It's fine once in a while."

"Eehh, I like sweet omelets. Salty ones are just wrong..."

I think both have their merits. My father, who is a picky

"By the way, do you have this salty omelet in my lunch as

"You're persistent. You should be grateful that I'm making

"Please forgive me!"

He turned around in a panic and started eating.

I and Sayaka looked at each other. We both seem to be

"Shitty brother. I'm done."

Sayaka closed the first aid kit.

It had become a routine to change the bandage in the

"Thank you, Sayaka."

Sayaka silently stood up and put them away in the

"I'm leaving now."

Soon, I heard the sound of the door being closed. The

I grabbed my bag. I called out to my father.

"I'll go now, too. Just put away the dishes as usual."

I left the living room and put on my shoes at the front

It was a beautiful day. According to the weather forecast,

I get pumped up to do my best today as well.

When I entered the classroom, Saito was already in his

When I greeted him good morning, he replied with a

"What are you reading?"

"It's early in the morning... Why are you doing that?"

What I could see were a few illustrations that looked like

"No, this is... just amazing."

His eyes were serious as if he was watching the super play

"It's really great. It's just amazing."

He was passionate about it, but it only made my heart

"Have you been into it lately?"

Saito nodded broadly.

"...Good for you."

Thanks to the end of the midterm test, my sense of

I sat down and took out a notebook and a problem book

"Oi Oi. Did you turn down my invitation to study? Just