Running head: LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 1

Loss of Religious or Spiritual Identities Among the LGBT Population

Andrew William Wood and Abigail Holland Conley

University of Central Florida and Virginia Commonwealth University

Note: This is an unfinished earlier draft of the following article -

Wood, A. W., & Conley, A. H. (2014). Loss of religious or spiritual identities among the

LGBT population. Counseling and Values, 59, 95-111.

LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 2

Abstract

Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) individuals are at risk for having negative

experiences with religion due to mainstream religions’ non-LGBT affirming stance. Negative

religious experiences could lead to religious or spiritual (R/S) struggles and loss of (R/S) identity

in order to maintain sexual identity. We describe R/S abuse, R/S struggle, and how they can

result in loss of R/S identity in LGBT individuals. Finally, we provide a case study, counseling

implications, and areas for future research.

Keywords: religious identity, sexual identity, lgbt, religious abuse, loss

LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 3

Loss of Religious or Spiritual Identities Among the LGBT Population

The loss of religious or spiritual (R/S) identity can be a significant development in

individuals’ lives and can complicate their lives by eliciting emotions that range from relief to

anger (Barra et al., 1993). Often when individuals experience pain they turn to their R/S beliefs

for comfort; however if their R/S beliefs are a source of pain, their R/S identity can be in

jeopardy. For many historically marginalized populations, relationships with mainstream

religious institutions can be contentious. If R/S leaders, religious community members, or other

influential R/S individuals teach lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) individuals that

their sexual identities and R/S identities are mutually exclusive, LGBT individuals are at risk to

experience R/S struggles. When R/S struggles result in loss of R/S identities, individuals may be

unprepared for resulting feelings of grief. Therefore, the purpose of this manuscript is to

underscore a need for counselors and researchers to address the effects of LGBT individuals’

loss of R/S identities and to examine the concepts of R/S abuse and R/S struggle. Finally, we

present a case study of an individual that suffers from a loss of R/S identity and explore the

implications for counselors and researchers.

Religion and Spirituality

Researchers have examined concepts related to religion, such as spirituality and faith, for

decades (Allport & Ross, 1967; Fowler, 1981; Hill & Pargament, 2003; James, 1902). Religion

and spirituality are closely related and are often mistaken for one another (Hill & Pargament,

2003; Zinnbauer et al., 1997). Spirituality refers to individualized, subjective experiences that

focus on the sacred and lacks institutional or denominational aspects (Ellor & McGregor, 2011).

The concept of religion, on the other hand, refers to communal, objective experiences that focus

on the sacred and includes institutional or denominational aspects. However, religion and
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 4

spirituality are not necessarily mutually exclusive concepts (Zinnbauer et al., 1997). To this end,

we will use the terms religion and spirituality together in this manuscript. In all other contexts,

use of the words religious and religion refer to institutional and ritualized practices; use of the

words spiritual and spirituality refer to personalized experiences.

As individuals develop what their R/S lives mean to them, they begin to develop an R/S

identity (Fowler, 1981). R/S identity varies greatly among individuals; for some it can be a

bedrock of their core identity, for others it may be constantly in flux, or lost altogether (Barra et

al., 1993). In addition, R/S identity can be at odds with other aspects of individuals’ core

identity. One type of identity that may conflict with R/S is sexual identity (Melton, 1991).

Consequently, as LGBT individuals with developing R/S identities come to terms with this

conflict, certain experiences may result in spiritual struggles that can lead to loss of R/S

identities. One type of experience that R/S LGBT individuals can encounter is R/S abuse.

Religious and Spiritual Abuse

Historically, researchers use the term R/S abuse to examine non-mainstream R/S

situations, particularly in looking at individuals who have recently left cults (Langone, 1993;

Ward, 2011). Researchers also use the term R/S abuse in conjunction with other terms like

physical abuse (Bent-Goodley & Fowler, 2006; Dehan & Levi, 2009). One definition of R/S

abuse is the “mistreatment of a person who is in need of help, support, or greater spiritual

empowerment with the result of weakening, undermining, or decreasing that person’s spiritual

empowerment” (Johnson & van Vonderen, 1991, p. 20). In addition, Ward (2011) emphasized

that individuals in leadership positions can perpetrate R/S abuse in order to produce conformity

within R/S communities. Others use the term R/S abuse to refer to physical, sexual, or

psychological abuse perpetrated by those in power within R/S communities (Gubi & Jacobs,
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 5

2009). We include institutional and denominational components of religion in the definition of

R/S abuse, as religious denominations have various tenets and beliefs that relate to approval or

disapproval of LGBT individuals (Melton, 1991). We will explore R/S abuse via Ward’s types of

R/S abuse (2011), integrate microaggressions as defined by Sue et al. (2007), and expand

microaggressions to include sexual microaggressions (Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011) in

order to understand the impact of R/S abuse on LGBT individuals.

Ward (2011) identifies six types of R/S abuse: (a) leadership representing God, (b)

spiritual bullying, (c) acceptance via performance, (d) spiritual neglect, (e) expanding

external/internal tension, and (f) manifestation of internal states. Individuals experience R/S

abuse when they experience negative mental health effects due to their interactions with others in

regards to their R/S lives. Individuals that experience R/S abuse can experience any one of the

types of R/S abuse, or a combination thereof.

Leadership Representing God

Leadership representing God is a type of R/S abuse that entails R/S leaders speak the

literal words of a deity (Ward, 2011). Religion itself can also be a type of leadership, with

religious tenets being considered the words of deities. LGBT individuals may feel that because

their religion or R/S leaders denounce homosexuality, that their deity denounces homosexuality,

and in turn, LGBT individuals (Schuck & Liddle, 2001). An example of leadership representing

God would be if a religious leader uses a religious text that negatively references homosexuality

and then espouses that view as the literal word of a deity.

Spiritual Bullying

Spiritual bullying is a type of R/S abuse that refers to religious leaders or religious peers

who actively bully or harass individuals to produce conformity of R/S community members
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 6

(Ward, 2011). Due to communal aspect of some religions, spiritual bullying can come from R/S

leaders, from religious communities, or from society (e.g., national and international news that

describe LGBT issues in religion). For example, spiritual bullying would occur if a religious

leader threatens to let R/S community members know about an individual’s sexual identity if the

individual does not attend reparative therapy.

Acceptance via Performance

Acceptance via performance is a type of R/S abuse that refers to a need for individuals to

perform in R/S desirable ways, due to fear of retribution by their religions (Ward, 2011). LGBT

individuals may deny their sexual identities in order to perform effectively in and feel acceptance

from their religions. Other types of R/S abuse, like spiritual bullying, can influence acceptance

via performance. An example of acceptance via performance would be if a LGBT individual

attempts to hide a sexual identity for fear of disapproval by R/S community members.

Spiritual Neglect

Spiritual neglect is a type of R/S abuse that entails that R/S leaders or members of a

religion neglect individuals as they are in emotional or physical pain (Ward, 2011). That is, R/S

leaders can reason that emotional or physical pain originates from sins or wrongdoings by

individuals that experience emotional or physical pain. LGBT individuals can feel that when they

seek LGBT-affirming support, they distance themselves from their religions, which can

encourage neglect from their religious communities. For example, an LGBT individual

experiences depressive symptoms when attempting to integrate a sexual identity and a R/S

identity, and the individual’s religious community disregards the depressive symptoms because

they view it as a consequence of not following religious teachings.

Expanding External/Internal Tension

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Expanding external/internal tension is a type of R/S abuse that entails that individuals

cannot express individuality due to their strong group identity (Forsyth, 2009; Ward, 2011).

LGBT individuals can wish to express their individual sexual identities but feel pressure to

suppress their identities if their identities are incongruent with the group’s R/S identities. An

example is an LGBT individual that lives a compartmentalized lifestyle in which the individual

expresses a sexual identity and a R/S identity, but not concurrently. LGBT individuals that face

expanding external/internal tension can experience emotional distress.

Manifestation of Internal States

Finally, manifestation of internal states is a type of R/S abuse that entails physical and

psychological repercussions of experiences of R/S abuse (Ward, 2011). LGBT individuals may

express symptoms of stress, anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideations in relation to their

religious experiences (Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011; Super & Jacobson, 2011). For

example, a LGBT individual develops ulcers due to stress of living incongruent lifestyles

between a sexual identity and a R/S identity.

Sexual Microaggressions

In order to encapsulate how LGBT individuals can experience R/S abuse, we suggest a

seventh type of R/S abuse that is an integration of microaggressions (Sue et al., 2007) and sexual

microaggressions (Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011). To understand the subtleties of abuse by

institutional and social systems, the concept of microaggressions is integral to understand

marginalization felt by non-majority individuals (e.g., LGBT individuals; Sue et al., 2007).

Racial microaggressions are defined as, “brief, everyday exchanges that send denigrating

messages to people of color because they belong to a racial minority group” (Sue et al., 2007, p.

273). Similarly, the term sexual microaggression applies to microaggressions with foci against
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 8

LGBT individuals (Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011). Sexual microaggressions can increase

marginalization of LGBT individuals in non-LGBT affirming religions. We examine three types

of microaggressions (Sue, 2010) through the lens of sexual microaggressions (Shelton &

Delgado-Romero, 2011) to understand how LGBT individuals experience R/S abuse.

Microassaults. Microassaults are overt forms of discrimination (Sue et al., 2007).

Individuals in power perpetrate microassaults when they (a) feel levels of protection that a veil of

anonymity provides, (b) have viewpoints in common with the majority of their audience, or (c)

are able to control their attitudes and opinions in multiple settings. As individuals in power

perpetrate microassaults and the majority agrees with the individuals in power, the effects of

microassaults felt by individuals can go unnoticed (Sue, 2010). An example would be a R/S

community leader that states that LGBT individuals lead lifestyles that are an abomination to

their deity (Sue, et al., 2007).

Microinsults. Microinsults are comments that insult or denigrate individuals and

emphasize senses of otherness (Sue et al., 2007). Individuals that perpetrate microinsults may not

intend to cause any emotional or psychological harm to individuals. Microinsults are dangerous

in institutional settings because perpetrators of microinsults often do not notice the impacts upon

marginalized individuals. Therefore, the effects of microinsults felt by individuals may go

unnoticed (Sue, 2010). An example would be a religious community member that tells a LGBT

individual “God still loves you” in regards to an individual’s sexual identity (Sue et al., 2007).

Microinvalidations. Microinvalidations are comments made towards individuals that

victims perceive as though a part of their identities are invalid (Sue, et al., 2007).

Microinvalidations can add to otherness felt by LGBT individuals in non-LGBT affirming

religions. Otherness felt by LGBT individuals can lead to negative emotions and the effects of
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 9

microinvalidations felt by individuals can go unnoticed (Barton, 2010; Sue, 2010). An example

of a microinvalidation would be a religious community member telling an LGBT member of that

community that he or she “loves the sinner, but hates the sin” in regards to the LGBT member’s

sexual identity.

Experiences of R/S abuse and sexual microaggressions can hamper LGBT individuals’

sexual identity developments and R/S identity developments (Rodriguez & Ouelette, 2000).

Experiences of R/S abuse can cause feelings of depression, low self-esteem, and suicidal

ideations (Barton, 2010). Consequently, LGBT individuals can experience R/S struggles as

results of R/S abuse (Pargament et al., 2005)

Religious or Spiritual Struggle

In the past 10 years, research on spiritual struggles has increased (Bryant, 2011; Ellison

& Lee, 2010; McConnell, Pargament, Ellison, & Flannelly, 2006; Pargament et al., 2005;

Rockenbach, Walker, & Luzader, 2012). R/S struggles are “efforts to conserve or transform a

spirituality that has been threatened or harmed” (Pargament et al., 2005, p. 247). R/S struggles

can result in positive outcomes, negative outcomes, or both (Pargament et al., 2005). R/S

struggles can have multiple characteristics, such as doubts of the concept of a deity, negative

experiences with individuals within a religion, and questions of R/S validity (Ellison & Lee,

2010). Individuals can experience multiple types of R/S struggles and the outcomes of R/S

struggles vary amongst individuals (Ellison & Lee, 2010; Rockenbach et al., 2012; Rodriguez &

Ouellette, 2000).

Ellison and Lee (2010) identify three types of R/S struggles: divine struggles,

intrapsychic struggles, and interpersonal struggles. Ellison and Lee found that individuals who

experience any types of R/S struggles experience psychological distress (n = 1,445). Individuals
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 10

that experience divine struggles have the most distressful experiences in regards to mental health,

followed by individuals that experience intrapsychic struggles and interpersonal struggles,

respectively. Ellison and Lee (2010) only explored factors reported in previously gathered data,

therefore generalizability to diverse populations (e.g., racial, religious, or sexual minorities) is

limited and warrants continued research. Individuals that experience R/S abuse can arrive at R/S

struggles, therefore it is important to understand how R/S abuse can cause R/S struggles.

Divine Struggle

Divine struggles occur when individuals question their deities (Ellison & Lee, 2010).

Individuals may come to doubt that their deities care about them, answer prayers, or exist. For

LGBT individuals, R/S abuse may lead to divine struggles. Individuals may feel that their deities

have made mistakes in regards to their sexual identity or that their deities hate them because of

their sexual identity (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). The diversity of religious views of LGBT

individuals can complicate divine struggles (Melton, 1991). If religions endorse negative views

of LGBT individuals and their lifestyles, involvement of church leaders that support these tenets

can encourage R/S abuse via leadership representing God, which can encourage microassaults

(Sue et al., 2007; Ward, 2011).

Intrapsychic Struggle

Intrapsychic struggles occur when individuals have personal doubts in their R/S beliefs

(Ellison & Lee, 2010). For some individuals, intrapsychic struggles can become opportunities for

growth and R/S development (Pargament et al., 2005); however, intrapsychic struggles can also

have negative effects on individuals’ mental health (Ellison & Lee, 2010). Doubt and worry,

consequences of intrapsychic struggles, relate to negative mental and physical health effects over

time. Individuals can experience intrapsychic struggles from R/S abuse due to acceptance via
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 11

performance (Ward, 2011). Also, expanding internal/external tensions (Ward, 2011) can cause

intrapsychic struggles in individuals that feel separations between their R/S communities and

support groups that provide encouragement (e.g., LGBT resource centers and youth networks).

Interpersonal Struggle

Finally, interpersonal struggles occur when individuals have negative interactions with

individuals in religious settings (Ellison & Lee, 2010). Interpersonal struggles can be a result of

individual interactions with R/S community members or extended experiences with religious

institutions in general. Higher-level authority increases the impacts on individuals that

experience interpersonal struggles (e.g., negative experiences with religious leaders have more

impact than negative experiences with religious peers). Individuals that experience spiritual

bullying components of R/S abuse can arrive at interpersonal R/S struggles due to negative

interactions with individuals in their religions (Ward, 2011). In addition, individuals may

experience spiritual neglect if they feel that their religious communities believe that they have

turned from their religions due to not fulfilling certain tasks. Finally, microinsults and

microinvalidations can play a role in causes of interpersonal R/S struggles (Ellison & Lee, 2010)

as individuals can perpetrate them even though they are not aware that they are a cause of harm

to others (Sue et al., 2007). Experiences of spiritual struggles can cause individuals to examine

their R/S beliefs and decide how they feel their identities can or cannot continue to develop.

Multiple Identities and Outcomes of Religious or Spiritual Struggle

There is a considerable amount of research on sexual identity development and R/S

identity development that explores how these two identities coexist and how they can work

against each other at times (Buchanan, Dzelme, Harris, & Hecker, 2001; Rodriguez & Ouellette,

2000; Schuck & Liddle, 2001; Sherry et al., 2010). Researchers find that LGBT individuals from
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conservative R/S backgrounds feel shame and guilt in regards to their sexual identities when they

attempt to reconcile their R/S identities (Sherry et al., 2010). Researchers also find that

incongruences between sexual identity and R/S identity can lead to questions of R/S identity that

require individuals to question, redefine, or abandon their R/S identities (Hansen & Lambert,

2011; Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). Individuals’ sexual identities can exacerbate the quantity

and quality of R/S struggles in LGBT individuals due to competition with R/S identities

(Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000; Sherry et al., 2010).

If LGBT individuals experience R/S abuse, they can experience conflicts between

multiple identities (Barton, 2010; Buchanan et al., 2001; Schuck & Liddle, 2001). Individuals’

R/S development and sexual development play important roles in self-concept and identity

formation. Indeed, positive mental and physical health positively correlate with R/S beliefs and

sexual identity openness (Lutjen, Silton, & Flannelly, 2012; Smith, McCullough, & Poll, 2003;

Vaughan & Waehler, 2010). As individuals come to terms with incongruent R/S and sexual

identities, R/S questions can arise (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000; Sherry et al., 2010). When

LGBT individuals experience R/S abuse, identity integration becomes complicated; thus, LGBT

individuals can be vulnerable to experience R/S struggles. When R/S struggles occur, individuals

can attempt to reconcile their R/S and sexual identities. Rodriguez and Ouellette (2000) identify

four potential outcomes for LGBT individuals’ attempts to reconcile their R/S and sexual

identities: (a) integration of R/S and sexual identities, (b) compartmentalization of R/S and

sexual identities, (c) rejection of sexual identities, and (d) rejection of R/S identities.

Identity Integration

The first outcome is that LGBT individuals integrate their R/S identity and their sexual

identity to live both identities simultaneously (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). Consequently,
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experiences of integration can cause LGBT individuals to redefine their R/S identities and sexual

identities to fit their needs for a harmonious life (Hansen & Lambert, 2011; Sherry et al., 2010).

Often, LGBT-affirming religious institutions help individuals with integration of their identities

(Lease, Horne, Noffsinger-Frazier, 2005; Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). Identity integration can

lead to positive mental health outcomes (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000; Schuck & Liddle, 2001).

Compartmentalization

The next potential outcome occurs when LGBT individuals do not reconcile their R/S

and sexual identities, thus both identities exist separately (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). The

experience of compartmentalization leads to constant management of identities that result in

increased stress if individuals do not reconcile their R/S identities and their sexual identities

(Sherry et al., 2010). LGBT individuals that experience compartmentalization can experience

continuation of R/S abuse, which can lead to subsequent emotional and psychological distress

(Ellison & Lee, 2010; Sherry et al., 2010; Super & Jacobson, 2011).

Rejection of Sexual Identity

The third potential outcome of attempted identity integration is rejection of sexual

identities in order to maintain R/S identities (Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000). LGBT individuals

who do not reconcile their R/S identities and their sexual identities can abandon or conceal their

sexual identities. Researchers that study loss of sexual identities refer to methods such as

reparative therapy (also known as conversion therapy) as a way to aid individuals to abandon

their sexual identities. Reparative therapy is seen as a controversial and dangerous form of

therapy that is used to aid individuals that identify as LGBT to identify as heterosexual (Maccio,

2011; Spitzer, 2003). Reparative therapy is seen as harmful to clients and has been challenged by

organizations such as the American Counseling Association, the American Psychological

LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 14

Association, and the American Medical Association, (Drescher & Zucker, 2006; Jenkins &

Johnston, 2004). Treatments like reparative therapy can exacerbate detrimental mental health

issues for LGBT individuals that reject their sexual identities.

Rejection of Religious or Spiritual Identity

The final potential outcome of attempted identity integration is rejection of R/S identity

in order to maintain individuals’ sexual identities. Wagner et al. (1994) found that 69% of gay

men reject their R/S identities when they attempt to integrate their sexual identities and R/S

identities in order to embrace their sexual identities. Sherry et al. (2010) note loss of R/S

identities in 10.5% of individuals that attempt to integrate their sexual identities and R/S

identities. Sherry et al.’s study did not show high generalizability due to self-admitted low

variation in their population (e.g., predominantly identified as white and single), but

nevertheless, loss of R/S identities has been noted in literature numerous times (Ganzevoort, van

der Laan, & Olsman, 2011; Rodriguez & Ouellette, 2000).

Researchers identify positive and negative effects of identity integration (Rodriguez &

Ouellette, 2000), compartmentalization (Coyle & Rafalin, 2000), and rejection of sexual

identities (Maccio, 2011). Rejection of R/S identities has not received sufficient research,

therefore further exploration is necessary, particularly as Americans are becoming less-religious

(D’Andrea & Sprenger, 2007; Gallup, 2010). There has been little research that conceptualizes

loss of R/S identities (Cataldo, 2010), and less that provides counseling implications for

individuals that have experienced, or are experiencing loss of R/S identities (Herzbrun, 1999).

Further exploration of a loss of religious or spiritual identities. One of the outcomes

of R/S struggles leads to stronger, more mature R/S identities, while the other outcome can lead

to weaker R/S identities (Ellison & Lee, 2010; Fowler, 1981; Pargament et al., 2005). There is a
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 15

breadth of research on the negative and positive aspects of R/S struggles, but there exists a need

for researchers to address loss of R/S identities and the consequences that this form of loss

entails. We posit that LGBT individuals experience R/S struggles more often, and in greater

amounts, than heterosexual individuals due to greater vulnerability to R/S abuse. The amount of

R/S abuse that LGBT individuals experience appears to lead to weaker R/S identities, or loss of

R/S identities altogether (Sherry et al., 2010). To understand how to conceptualize loss of R/S

identities, we will examine two identity development models (Cass, 1979; Fowler, 1981) to assist

us in treatment of clients that have experienced, or are experiencing, loss of R/S identity. We will

also examine research that addresses loss of R/S identities in general (Barra et al., 1993).

Cass’s model of Homosexual Identity Development (1979) conceptualizes developmental

processes that individuals experience in development of their sexual identities. In particular,

individuals are vulnerable to R/S identity loss in the identity tolerance stage and the identity

acceptance stage. In the identity tolerance stage, individuals begin to accept their new identities

as LGBT and associate with others that identify as LGBT. In this stage, as individuals have

positive or negative encounters with other LGBT individuals, their perceptions of their new

identity shapes accordingly. When individuals accept their LGBT identities, they move into the

identity acceptance stage wherein they are subject to exposure to non-LGBT individuals.

Increases in negative experiences (e.g., religious abuse) with individuals at this time can lead to

loss of R/S identities, as their LGBT identities and R/S experiences become incongruent.

Fowler’s Stages of Faith (1981) conceptualizes R/S identity development. In particular,

individuals are particularly vulnerable to R/S identity loss in the synthetic-conventional stage and

the individuative-reflective stage. In the synthetic-conventional stage, individuals are usually in

an appeal-to-authority mode in which they believe what R/S leaders teach. In this stage, LGBT
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 16

individuals are susceptible to R/S abuse by non-LGBT-affirming religious communities. If R/S

leaders tell individuals that homosexuality is a sin, then individuals may reject their LGBT

identity to adhere to their religion. If individuals progress to the individuative-reflective stage,

they develop internal authority of their R/S identity versus relying on external authority. It is at

this stage that individuals can become more critical of their religions and can question their

beliefs: therefore, spiritual struggles may take place. If individuals reach the individuative-

reflective stage of R/S identity development, incongruence between their R/S identity and LGBT

identity can result in loss of R/S identity.

The authors identified only one study that examined loss of R/S identity. Barra et al.

(1993) found in a sample of college students (n = 338), 49% of males and 63.1% of females

reported no sense of loss in regards to loss of R/S identities. In the same sample, Barra et al.

found that males and females reported that they have felt loss in regards to R/S identities (13.7%,

21.7%). In Barra et al.’s sample, males and females experienced feelings of anger (5.9%, 6.5%),

sadness (15.7%, 19.6%), guilt (33.3%, 43.5%), and anxiety (21.6%, 17.4%) in regards to loss of

R/S identities. Barra et al.’s research is more salient today than ever, due to an increasing amount

of individuals that do not claim to be religious (Gallup, 2010).

As LGBT individuals are at risk to experience R/S abuse (Sherry et al., 2010; Super &

Jacobson, 2011), they are at risk to experience negative feelings due to loss of R/S identities.

Negative feelings that individuals experience due to loss of R/S identities can relate to numerous

processes, specifically the process of grief (Barra et al., 1993). If we consider grief and the nature

of this non-finite loss (see Schultz & Harris, 2011), individuals that experience loss of R/S

identities can experience disenfranchised grief (Doka, 1989).

Counseling Implications
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 17

As we describe in this manuscript, there are important connections between R/S abuse

and loss of R/S identities. For many individuals, specifically LGBT individuals, experiences of

R/S abuse (Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011; Ward, 2011), can lead to R/S struggles

(Pargament et al., 2005). R/S struggles can result in loss of R/S identities that lead to negative

mental health effects. As this line of reasoning is conceptual, we will offer counseling

implications via a case study: individual counseling with a focus on disenfranchised grief, the

need to be religiously literate, and the need to seek out competency standards set out by

counseling organizations.

Case Study

Maggie is a 26-year-old lesbian whose parents raised her in the Church of Jesus Christ of

Latter-day Saints (LDS) in rural Florida. Maggie’s family would spend three hours at church

every Sunday and she would give her testimony of the church’s teachings every month.

Maggie’s family went to the temple two hours away from home every three months to do

different jobs to help in the church. At the age of 19, Maggie went on a mission trip for a year

and a half in Italy. In her mission trip, she began to realize that she was a lesbian. Throughout

Maggie’s time in the church, her bishop and other members of the church often told her the

importance of having a family that consists of a husband and children. In Maggie’s time in the

church, religious leaders told her that LGBT individuals would not be with their families in the

afterlife. Religious leaders and peers taught Maggie the importance of love for everyone as a

child of God, but that LGBT individuals are misguided and that attraction to someone of the

same sex was wrong and unnatural.

Maggie left the church at the age of 25 began individual counseling a year later. In the

second counseling session, Maggie reported that when she heard that the LDS church donated to
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 18

various anti-LGBT rights causes, she felt that her church, her family, and God did not want her

anymore and that she decided to leave the church. Maggie reported that she felt empty and angry.

When the counselor asked Maggie about how she felt about no longer being religious, she

confessed to suicidal ideations when she decided to leave the church and commented that she felt

that she was not a holy individual because she could not change her attraction to women. She

reported crying spells most nights out of the week since she left the church. She reported that she

did not share her emotions on this topic to anyone as people have told her that it was her decision

to leave her church. Conversations with others exacerbated her negative emotions and

contributed to social isolation.

In her time in counseling, Maggie and her counselor discussed how her loss of R/S

identity could be similar to other types of loss, including death of loved ones. Maggie mourned

her R/S identity and longed for the time that she could talk to someone from her church to help

cheer her up and let her know that God would always be there for her. Maggie’s counselor began

to help Maggie identify individuals that shared her experiences (e.g., online support groups).

Maggie began to experience grief, and in the grief process, she began to feel an alleviation of

depressive symptoms. Maggie acknowledges that she missed the ritual aspect of the LDS church,

and that being involved in online support groups as well as joining LGBT advocacy groups has

started to fill the void of the social aspect of church. When Maggie and her counselor felt that

she had grieved her R/S identity, her counselor provided Maggie with resources for LGBT-

affirming churches in her area if she felt the need to be a part of a religious group again. Maggie

chose not to join any LGBT-affirming churches, but later noted that she had volunteered at an

LGBT rights event alongside individuals from the local Metropolitan Community Church (an

LGBT-affirming church) and felt comfortable talking with them.

LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 19

Implications

In the case study, Maggie experienced R/S abuse through her interactions with church

members (i.e., spiritual bullying, spiritual neglect, expanding external/internal tension, and

microinsults), the church as a unit (i.e., acceptance via performance and microinvalidations), and

the practices of the church representing God (i.e., leadership representing God and

microassaults). In Maggie’s transitions, she perceived the teachings of the LDS church and the

attitudes of others as abusive. Maggie entered a state of R/S struggle that manifested in divine

struggles, intrapsychic struggles, and interpersonal struggles. Because of Maggie’s R/S struggles,

she experienced a loss of R/S identity, as she could not integrate her R/S and sexual identities.

Maggie experienced disenfranchised grief in this process, as she did not have adequate social

support that would accept her loss of R/S identity as a valid form of grief. The counselor helped

Maggie to grieve her R/S identity as she would grieve the loss of a loved one. Maggie’s

transition from a straight-identified LDS member includes transitions mentioned in our

discussion on sexual and R/S identity development models.

Maggie’s sexual identity transition, from Cass’s perspective (1979), is a transition from

the identity tolerance stage to the identity acceptance stage. Zubernis, Snyder, and McCoy (2011)

describe that individuals transitioning through the identity tolerance stage to the identity

acceptance stage (Cass, 1979) need social support to help individuals find a sense of community.

Use of groups (e.g., LGBT support groups) outside of individual counseling can help individuals

in dealing with their loss of R/S identity. Gaining support from the LGBT community can aid

individuals during their sexual identity changes and replace some of the role of religious

communities. Encouraging clients to engage in community support for LGBT individuals can

also increase social support. Maggie’s R/S transition, from Fowler’s perspective (1981), is a
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 20

transition from the synthetic-conventional stage to the individuative-reflective stage. Parker

(2011) describes that individuals moving to an individuative-reflective stage can grieve the loss

of friends and religious community members, as those that hold less advanced (i.e., advancement

of stages) views on religion and spirituality and can interpret questioning of religious beliefs as

threatening. Counselors can aid individuals in their transition from the synthetic-conventional

stage to the individuative-reflective stage (Fowler, 1981) by allowing for individuals an open-

space to explore their loss of R/S identity, how it is affecting them, and guide them in making

meaning from their loss of R/S identity (Parker, 2011; Wong, 2010). Meaning making can have a

powerful effect in the life of those suffer from loss (Neimeyer, 2000). While researchers and

clinicians normally associate meaning making with physical death, a loss of R/S identity

warrants the use of meaning making in counseling due to the existential nature of R/S identity

(Klaassen & McDonald, 2002). Meaning making strategies found in existential and brief

therapies can be particularly helpful (Frankl, 1959; Presbury, Echterling, & McKee, 2007). The

counselor had an ability to provide resources if Maggie sought a more LGBT-affirming religious

experience due to the counselor’s religious literacy. It is also important to note that if Maggie did

not find the need to join a more LGBT-affirming religion, that the counselor should help Maggie

find her way through her new identity of being a non-religious individual. The counselor would

be effective by being present and adaptable with Maggie as they both move through a process of

Maggie’s new identity formation of being a nonreligious or nonspiritual individual.

While counseling individuals that are experienced, or are experiencing, a loss of R/S

identity, counselors should refer to counseling competencies from the Association for Spiritual,

Ethical, and Religious Values in Counseling (ASERVIC) that provide counselors with standards

for addressing R/S concerns in counseling (2009). The ASERVIC competencies contain
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 21

guidelines to prepare counselors to address issues that those who have experienced loss of R/S

identity may have experienced (e.g., counselor vs. client worldview, awareness of a lack of

knowledge of client experiences, and R/S development). Counselors should also refer to

counseling competencies from the Association for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender

Issues in Counseling (ALGBTIC) has two sets of competencies: one for counseling lesbian, gay,

bisexual, queer, questioning, intersex, and ally individuals and one for counseling transgender

individuals (2010; 2013). Both ALGBTIC sets of competencies contain guidelines for counseling

LGBT individuals, such as those facing loss of R/S identity, dealing with a variety of issues (e.g.,

institutional oppression, client R/S values, and identity development). In reference to grief

counseling, counselors should investigate how to counsel grieving individuals. Development of

grief therapy competencies will assist counselors to ethically counsel those with grief, possibly

due to loss of R/S identity (Ober, Granello, & Wheaton, 2012).

Discussion

More research is necessary to explore loss of R/S identities amongst all individuals. The

concepts that we have brought forth in this manuscript, although important, do not yet have

empirical bases. Counselors should use these concepts with caution as individual differences

exist in experiences of R/S abuse, R/S struggles and loss of R/S identities. To assess the validity

of these concepts and the true value of counselors that approach these topics, further research is

necessary. First, qualitative studies that detail the experiences of LGBT individuals that suffer

loss of R/S identities are important to validate these ideas. To research a new concept such as the

loss of R/S identities appropriately, it would be prudent for researchers to use methodology such

as grounded theory in order to conceptualize this experience (Charmaz, 2006). As we look at loss

of R/S identities, it is important to look at religious factors, such as different religions (e.g., non-
LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 22

western and non-Christian religions) and polity (Finke & Stark, 2005). Quantitative research is

necessary to assess the validity of the negative effects of loss of R/S identities as well as

generalizability to different individuals (e.g., individuals in the military, individuals of diverse

religions, etc.). Specifically, quantitative research pertaining to predictors of loss of R/S

identities (e.g., religious abuse and spiritual struggles) would benefit the counseling field by

obtaining an understanding of what impacts the experiences of losing R/S identities. It is

important to focus on marginalized populations such as LGBT individuals as they are

particularly susceptible to R/S abuse (Super & Jacobson, 2011). Finding causes of loss of R/S

identities and evidence-based practices for treatment of these individuals is an important task.

Conclusion

Loss of R/S identities can cause negative mental health effects in some individuals (Barra

et al., 1993). As the United States becomes a less religious country (Gallup, 2010), we can infer

that the amount of individuals that abandon their R/S identities is increasing. This loss is of

concern for counselors and researchers especially when they assess the possible mental health

concerns of LGBT individuals who are more likely to experience R/S abuse. As LGBT

individuals experience R/S abuse, they can enter into R/S struggles, which can then lead to loss

of R/S identities. Due to the non-finite nature of loss of R/S identities (Schultz & Harris, 2011),

LGBT individuals can experience negative mental health effects. The counseling implications for

this phenomenon are important as multiple facets of individuals’ identities (e.g., R/S identities

and sexual identities) can be affected and require attention in order to help LGBT individuals

experience loss the most functional way possible. The research implications for this phenomenon

are important as more research needs to be conducted that concerns R/S abuse as well as who is

most effected by loss of R/S identities.

 LOSS OF RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL 23

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