CEL2103 WRITING ACADEMIC TEXTS

WRITING PORTFOLIO TASK 3 - 25%

NAME : MUHAMMAD FIKRI BIN MOHD NAJIB MATRIC NO : 203354 GROUP : 44

Instructions:

1. Based on your Task 2, fill in the form with the improved thesis statement, topic sentences and supporting sentences.
2. Write a supporting detail for each supporting sentence by paraphrasing the original excerpts for your supporting details. Include in-text citation
for each paraphrase.
3. Provide the reference sources in APA style. You should have at least two references for each paragraph.

THESIS STATEMENT

Although Iphone mobile device and Redmi mobile device share similarities in term of basic function as smartphone, they differ in aspects of
smartphone specification.
 BODY PARAGRAPH 1

TOPIC SENTENCE TO STATE SIMILARITIES

The similarity between of Iphone mobile device and Redmi mobile device is same basic function as smartphone.

SUPPORTING SENTENCE 1 (SIMILARITY 1)

Both Iphone and Redmi mobile device can communicate using their own aplication like Facetime and Mi Community.

SUPPORTING DETAIL 1
Original excerpt Paraphrase/Summary

Basicly, Facetime and Mi Community is the main aplication for their
device to use video call. FaceTime allows users to make audio and
video calls using their Apple devices. It is end-to-end encrypted and
cannot be intercepted or recorded by an outside party. The service
uses the internet to make calls rather than traditional phone
networks. Its same goes to Mi Community that user can make a
audio and video calls using the internet.
Facetime and Mi Community are the primary video calling
applications on their devices. Users may utilise FaceTime to make
audio and video calls from their Apple devices. It is encrypted from
beginning to end and cannot be intercepted or recorded by a third
party. Instead of using traditional phone networks, the service makes
calls through the internet. The same is true for Mi Community, where
users can use the internet to make audio and video calls.
REFERENCE (APA STYLE):
Berry. (2018). Benefits Of Using FaceTime. http://www.aliencodec.com/benefits-of-using-facetime/

SUPPORTING SENTENCE 2 (SIMILARITY 2)

Iphone and Redmi mobile device allowed us to surfing the internet using Safari and Google Chrome.

SUPPORTING DETAIL 2
Original excerpt Paraphrase/Summary

Nowadays, the use of internet on smartphones has become a The use of the internet on a smartphone has become a requirement
necessity for everyone. Smartphones are now responsible for a third for everyone nowadays. Smartphones now account for one-third of
of internet access, up from 23% in 2014. Iphone and Redmi is a all internet access, up from 23% in 2014. Iphone and Redmi is a
device that allows us to surf the internet freely. device that allows us to surf the internet freely.

REFERENCE (APA STYLE):

Hern. (6 August 2015). Smartphone now most popular way to browse internet – Ofcom report. The Guardian.
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2015/aug/06/smartphones-most-popular-way-to-browse-internet-ofcom
 BODY PARAGRAPH 2

TOPIC SENTENCE 2 (DIFFERENCE)

Despite this two device have a similarity in basic function as smartphone, Iphone and Redmi mobile device also have a differences in term of
their specification.

SUPPORTING SENTENCE 1 (DIFFERENCE 1)

Mostly people said that quality of Iphone camera is quite better than any other smartphone. Meanwhile, quality camera of Redmi also great
and not really far with Iphone camera but people still choose Iphone camera because of their originality in picture.

SUPPORTING DETAIL 1
Original excerpt Paraphrase/Summary

This is said to be so because, the increasingly popular ‘selfie’ culture
is causing people to look for smartphones that have good camera
quality. iPhones feature some of the best cameras for mobile
devices. Their latest model, the XR, has a 12-megapixel camera that
can even record in 4K. Meanwhile, camera features vary a lot when it
comes to Android. A cheap Android phone such as the Redmi 4i only
has a 5-megapixel camera that produces grainy pictures.
This is because consumers are looking for smartphones with good
camera quality due to the growing popularity of the "selfie" culture.
iPhones have some of the best camera capabilities of any mobile
smartphone. The XR, their most recent model, includes a 12-
megapixel camera that can film in 4K. Meanwhile, when it comes to
Android, camera features differ greatly. A 5-megapixel camera on a
low-cost Android phone like the Redmi 4i delivers blurry images.

REFERENCE (APA STYLE):

Verzosa. (n.d.). iPhone vs Android for Smartphone Photography. https://expertphotography.com/iphone-vs-android/
 SUPPORTING SENTENCE 2 (DIFFERENCE 2)
Furthemore, battery capacity for Iphone is quite low around 3000 mAh while the battery capacity of Redmi is incredible higher to compare
with Iphone around 5000 mAh.

SUPPORTING DETAIL 2
Original excerpt Paraphrase/Summary

The battery life of a smartphone is very important today. For Iphone
device, there are tiny chips called processors, which let it run the
camera, watch a video, and everything else. The more difficult the
task (or badly designed the app), the harder processors have to work
– draining more juice from your battery. Meanwhile, Redmi battery
performance are more better because the processors work lesser
than Iphone processor.
Nowadays, a smartphone's battery life is very important. There are
tiny chips called processors in Iphone devices that let it to run the
camera, watch videos, and do other things. The tougher a task (or a
poorly designed software) is, the harder processors must work,
consuming more power from your battery. Meanwhile, the Redmi
battery life is better than the iPhone's since the processors work less.

REFERENCE (APA STYLE):

Keach. (29 January 2019). NO CHARGE Bad iPhone battery life? This easy trick reveals the apps to DELETE right now. The Sun.
https://www.thesun.co.uk/tech/8295812/iphone-battery-life-apps-delete/
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