After Everything, Always

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/33227116.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/F, F/M, M/M
Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Relationship: Regulus Black/James Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Marlene
McKinnon/Dorcas Meadowes
Additional Tags: Endgame Regulus Black/James Potter, Regulus seeker, James chaser,
Regulus Black-centric, James Potter-centric, Alternate Universe -
Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Smut, Blowjobs, Pansexual James
Potter, Gay Regulus Black, Harry Potter is still born, Complicated
Brother Relationship, Some Jily, not slow burn, Not Canon Compliant,
Happy Ending
Language: English
Collections: Ongoing fic, wolfstar fics but like also any other fic that sounds mildly
interesting, Gay Harry Potter Fics
Stats: Published: 2021-08-13 Updated: 2022-11-12 Chapters: 34/55 Words:
261006

After Everything, Always

by Reggie4dayzz

Summary

"If I win you have to give me a blowjob in the locker room after the game. ” James stepped
back and reveled in the dark blush that appeared on his cheeks. Regulus Black was not easy
to make blush. He looked absolutely indignant at the suggestion and whipped his head
around to make sure no one had heard.

When he decided that no one had, looking at the confused faces surrounding him, he
seemed to relax a bit. He gritted out, “No fucking way.”

James smirked at him tauntingly, “Oh is the big bad Slytherin afraid of a little bet?”

Everyone knows the tragedy of Regulus Black and his bleak destiny, but what would've
happened if he had someone to help him? What if he had found someone to save him from
his destined watery grave? What if Regulus got to live past the age of eighteen? What if
James Potter had fallen in love with him?

Notes

This is the first fanfiction that I have posted on AO3. I wrote it because there are not
enough Jegulus/Starchaser happy ending stories out there. I will be straightforward about
this there will not be a Jily ending. There will be some Jily, but this is definitely about
James and Regulus. I will not apologize for how I wrote any of the characters, as this is
how I believe they would behave given the situations presented to them in the story. This is
not canon-compliant, though it will be fairly close to the storyline until after the Marauders
finish school. This is an LGTBQ positive book and most of the ships will be homosexual, if
you have a problem with that I don't know why you'd want to read Jegulus fanfic anyways.
Another thing to keep in mind is that this book takes place in the '70s, different times
different overall mindsets. I won't be posting author notes very often so I'm going to do a
blanket coverage content warning. I did mark this book as explicit however it probably
could've been mature as well. There will be sex because teenage boys have sex, it will have
details but not obscene details. There will be emotional and physical trauma. There will be
badly described quidditch matches. The credit for all the characters and places in the story
goes to J.K. Rowling. Hope you enjoy the book!
 Prefect meetings
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

I am not a bad person. I never meant to hurt anyone. To the people who were hurt by my actions, I
am so sorry. I swear that nothing I did was personal, I only did what I thought was best for my
family. Maybe that was the root of all the problems in my life, trying to do the right thing for
others but never for myself. Never letting myself be happy and feel free. I have never felt free even
for a day, I am forever trapped in this house, this body, and this name. To the people who once
believed in me, I am sorry. I am sorry that I couldn't be what you thought I could be, I wanted to
but I just couldn't. There are so many things I regret in my life and I know disappointing you is one
of my biggest regrets. To those who once loved me, I am most sorry to you. I am sorry that I wasn't
worthy of your love and I am truly sorry that you didn't trust someone more deserving with your
heart. I wish I could go back and erase the damage I did to you, but this letter will have to suffice. I
want you to know that this was always the outcome. I always had to go and you really couldn't
have loved me better. We were always meant to say goodbye.
R.A.B.

If you are receiving this letter Regulus Arcturus Black has passed. Please contact the appropriate
authorities for further details regarding funeral preparations.

Chapter 1

Reggie

The boy in the mirror didn’t recognize himself as he stared at his reflection. Who was this man?
Why did he have the face of Regulus Black? Certainly, this wasn’t Regulus Black. Regulus Black
was a boy, not a man. Yet the man in the mirror looked so like Regulus. He was tall and so skinny
he bordered on looking frail. His cheekbones should be sharp but instead, look delicate on his pale
face. His tamed curls rest just under his chin. He is wearing a grey day suit that is considered
fashionable in the current pureblood society. His grey eyes shine brightly back at the matching face
in the mirror. When did he become like this? When did he become a man? He wasn't ready to
become a man and face adult problems.

Then again, when had he ever dealt with actual problems that children are supposed to experience.
It seemed like all he ever dealt with was politics, punishment, and piety. He was fifteen years old,
he knew before long his parents would expect him to accept his role as the heir of the Ancient and
Most Noble House of Black. He never thought that those particular responsibilities and titles would
be his. It was certainly never the plan, for neither him nor his parents. He wasn’t the son who had
been trained at it since birth, no that was his brother Sirius. He was always the backup plan, the
spare child, the just in case everything goes to hell child. Well if what had happened last Christmas
wasn’t the definition of everything going to shit, then he truly didn't know what was.

The plan was to have plenty of boys between his father Orion and his uncle Cygnus, so this would
have never been a problem. They would have never had to resort to disowning one child and being
forced to make do with the backup child. The weak son. However, things never did go exactly
according to plan in the House of Black, Cygnus and his wife Druella had no boys but instead three
girls. Since the girls would not be able to keep their maiden name when they married, none of them
could inherit, although they were all older than the two Black brothers.

His father Orion and his mother Walpurga were blessed with Sirius Orion Black about three years
after the last daughter was born to his aunt and uncle, finally a child worthy of the Black
inheritance. Sirius had always been the favorite of all his cousins, being that he was the one
destined to continue the most impressive House of Black. His parents, never particularly fond of
each other, probably a product of them being first cousins, decided to have one more child just in
case they needed a spare heir. In case something happened to their firstborn, the child they wanted.
They had their second-born about a year and a half after Sirius was born and named this boy
Regulus Arcturus Black.

He grew up quite a bit different from the firstborn. The firstborn was treated like a little prince,
always receiving everything he wanted while Regulus was treated more like a burden. The child
that had no use to the family. They were of course treated differently, as one was the heir of the
family and the other was a walking safety net. However Sirius and Regulus both were children of
the Black house and as a result, both had vigorous training in calligraphy, manners, and speech
eloquence. It certainly wouldn’t do for them to embarrass the family with sloppy handwriting or
improper speech. Sirius also had lessons on how to manage the family finances with his father.

Regulus spent a lot of time alone, as a result of this. His parents did not like the boys to associate
with the muggles they lived near, so the boys were each other’s only playmates for many years
unless, of course, their cousins visited. Regulus became close to the Black family house-elf as
another playmate when his brother was busy. He assumes that his ability to adapt to being lonely
as a child is probably why he never made strong connections with his classmates. He had a few
mates but not like his brother had. His brother had three extremely close friends and dozens of
other friends. Guess it's not exactly surprising with how charismatic Sirius has always been.
Regulus had never had the natural charisma his brother possessed.

That was probably the reason his mother never much liked him or at least not in the way she liked
Sirius, She would never admit it, of course, given that Sirius was now a blood traitor. Regulus
wasn't ignorant though, he noticed that his mom had always respected Sirius. She respected his
stubbornness and fiery attitude, she thought it was exactly what an heir should possess. Now she
had to make do with a weak heir that did exactly what he was told.

He was just adjusting his hair once more in the mirror when he heard his mother calling him down
to leave for the train to Hogwarts. Well, he supposed this was probably as good as it was gonna
get. He called for Kreacher to grab his stuff and thanked the elf politely when he appeared. He
straightened his shoulders and wiped his face clean of emotion, then walked down the stairs. His
mother always said emotions were weak and you could never let people see you weak. It's funny
she never minded people seeing her emotions of anger, hatred, and disgust. I guess those were not
what she considered weak. His mother and father were standing at the bottom of the stairs with
matching emotionless expressions waiting for him. He knew they were waiting to give him a
lecture, as this was the first year he was going to go back to Hogwarts since Sirius had left.

He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and nodded slightly to his father. His mother looked him up
and down appraising his attire and nodded slightly in approval before beginning her speech, “
Regulus I think you understand how important this school year at Hogwarts is for you and our
family. You have OWLS this year and of course, you will need to be receiving all O’s. As you well
know, the reputation of this family is in a very precarious position since the little blood traitor
disgraced our name. You need to be absolutely perfect this year to put us back into a position of
excellence again. And of course to make sure that the Dark Lord will still take interest in you after
what happened at Christmas. If you disobey either your father or me, while at school then there
will be severe consequences.” She scowled when she brought up Sirius as if the very thought of
him churned her stomach.

His father stepped forward and put his hand on Regulus’ shoulder and spoke in a way that made it
seem as if he was promising something. As embarrassing as it was Regulus leaned into his father's
touch a bit, his father never touched him, in fact, he hardly even spoke to him. The man was more
than a little disappointed to have to retrain Regulus as his heir, when he had already spent years on
Sirius, he often neglected teaching Regulus at all, “Regulus, you will bring pride back to this
family and you will go nowhere near Sirius, do you understand? Do you understand what will
happen if we hear that you had contact with him?”

Regulus felt his heart clench at the idea of what his parents would do to him, he kept his face clear
of emotion and nodded as he spoke, “Yes, father and mother I will make you proud.” They did not
respond but his father motioned for him to grab his trunk, placing his hand back on Regulus’s
shoulder apparating them to the station. When they arrived his father gave him a nod goodbye and
apparated before Regulus could respond. He looked at the space where his father once stood,
thinking bitterly of a time when his father and mother would both escort Sirius to the station. Then
again of course they wouldn't do that for the spare heir. He shook those thoughts out of his head,
he was no longer the spare, now he was the only child of Orion and Walpurga Black.

He walked through the crowd of excited first years and bored seventh years, before boarding the
train. He found a compartment in the Slytherin section of the train and put his trunk away before
heading to the Prefect compartment. He had gotten the letter over the summer and he wasn't sure
he was very excited about being a prefect. His brother had never been one so it was something he
had accomplished that his parents couldn't compare to Sirius, but he didn't particularly relish the
idea of all the extra work required when he already had to do perfectly on his OWL's this year. Not
to mention his parents weren’t exactly proud of this accomplishment, it seemed as though they
expected it from him, which he didn't think was fair. They never expected Sirius to be prefect and
to get all O’s of his OWLS then again Sirius was probably the reason he had to be perfect this year.

He arrived in the compartment when there were just a couple of others in there. His Slytherin
prefect partner, Abigail Hoss was there. He didn't mind her but she was kind of annoying, to be
honest. She never shut up. She immediately waved him over and began talking about some
mundane subject that he couldn't give a shit less. It was only as the meeting began that he realized
that she had talked him through the train taking off and the rest of the prefects joining the cabin.
Merlin this girl needed to learn to shut her trap. He looked across from him and saw Lily Evans
and James Potter.

What the fuck was he doing here? Potter wasn't prefect for sixth year, Lupin was. He must have
been staring too long because Potter caught his eye and raised his eyebrow, sufficiently knocking
Regulus out of his trance. He immediately turned back to listen to the Head boy and girl speak.

"So now that we've introduced ourselves, we should probably introduce our new prefects this year.
So starting with Hufflepuff we have Sharlotte Waspo and Daniel Frewder, for Gryffindor we have
Shawn Voit and Melissa Stanely, for Ravenclaw we have Tarrant Pike and Lissy Gushwa, and
lastly, for Slytherin, we have Abigail Hoss and Regulus Black.”

Everyone clapped lightly and Regulus had to tell himself not to blush at the attention, Blacks don't
get nervous from a little light attention. He just really wasn't used to having people's eyes on him.

"Also, we have a change in our Gryffindor sixth year Prefects, Remus Lupin found the patrol
schedule to be too demanding and has rescinded his position. James Potter has now been chosen to
take his place.”

Everyone clapped again, he noticed the girls in the cabin clapped a bit louder this time, as if they
thought that adding the eye candy that was James Potter would be very beneficial to the prefect
team. Regulus couldn't help but roll his eyes. He noticed Potter watching his reaction to the news
with a curious expression. Regulus shot him a quick glare that led the prat to snort, how
unbecoming, before turning to listen to the Head prefects once again.

So Lupin couldn't handle the stress of being a prefect? Regulus didn't know what to think about
that. From the little, he knew about Remus Lupin, he knew the boy cared a lot about his studies. If
he thought that being a prefect was too stressful then maybe Regulus would need to give it up too.
Then again he didn't think his parents would appreciate that very much, the idea that a Black
couldn't handle a little stress was unthinkable. However, Lupin could have also found the whole
prefect thing to be a lot on top of studies, but also with being a werewolf.

Regulus had known Lupin's little secret since third year, it was pretty obvious if one was paying
attention. Regulus made it a priority to pay attention. He paid attention to the absence of Lupin
during mealtimes around the full moon. He paid attention to the scars that would appear on his
body when he finally did return. He paid attention to his brother and his other friend's secretive
manner when he did return. He paid attention enough to figure out most things people tried to keep
a secret. Regulus wasn't particularly worried about Lupin's condition, given that he was only
dangerous for like twelve hours every month, plus the staff wouldn't have allowed him to go to
Hogwarts unless they had him contained. He figured Lupin's containment had something to do with
why they put the heinous whomping willow on the grounds the year Sirius arrived. He
remembered his cousin Andromeda complaining that as a prefect she now had to keep her house
away from it and it was just extra responsibility.

Remus Lupin and James Potter were both extremely close to their brother. They had formed a little
group, along with another boy named Peter Pettigrew, and called themselves the Marauders.
Regulus thought that it was not only a ridiculous name but also that it was extremely egotistical to
name your friend group. Sirius had always been extremely vain, though so he really shouldn't be
surprised. James Potter, was probably the most arrogant prat in the entire school so he was sure he
had a hand in picking out their name as well. Pettigrew and Lupin didn't really seem all that ego-
filled, but then again he didn't know them well. His brother had met them in their first year and
proceeded to talk about them nonstop whenever he got the chance. Regulus had pretty much
despised the three other boys before he had even got to Hogwarts, James Potter in particular.

Regulus was so sick of hearing the names of the boys that had stolen his brother's attention from
him the summer before he had started Hogwarts. His brother and he had always been each other's
best friends, but when Sirius met them, he never called Regulus his best friend again. Instead, it
was, "Remus is a really cool lad, Reg. I can't wait for you to meet him" and "Peter is the best, wait
till you see", but his favorite was "James is my absolute best mate. Reggie, you'll love him when
you meet him". Regulus had met them, on the train his first year. They were nice, he supposed, but
after introductions were made he ended up feeling like a fifth wheel, Before leaving the
compartment, saying he had to visit the bathroom but never came back. That was when he met
Evan.

Regulus snapped back to attention when people began packing their things together before leaving
the compartment. Shit, he had zoned out throughout the entire meeting, he hadn't even heard the
patrol schedule or the new password. Fuck, he was starting to regret not turning down the prefect
duties. Potter made eye contact with Regulus and quickly blurted out to the head girl, “Wait, Jess.
You said that you'd give us the patrol schedule and the new password on a piece of parchment after
the sorting, right?”

Regulus’ attention snapped to Potter in surprise, it was as if he had read his mind. He was smirking
at Regulus in his typical arrogant fashion. The head girl rolled her eyes at this question, “ Yes,
James like we have said five times already, you will receive a parcel immediately after the sorting
with your schedule and password. As the head boy and girl Donaven and I will take the first patrol
so all of you can settle in for the year. Now, are there any more questions?”

At James' head shake, she continued enthusiastically, ”Great! Now that this meeting is concluded,
let's have a great year everyone!”
As Regulus packed his stuff up to leave the compartment, he considered the idea that James Potter
had only asked the head girl about the schedule because he realized that Regulus had not been
listening. He shook away that thought, because really why would James Potter ever try to help
him? How would he even know that Regulus wasn't listening?

He was one of the last people to leave the cabin, besides the two Gryffindor sixth-year prefects.
He was treated with a front-row seat to James Potter's pitiful attempt to woo Evans. It was honestly
so pathetic to watch. He had to admit out of all the muggle-borns in the school Lily Evans was
probably the least vile. So he did understand a bit of the attraction, however, he did not understand
the obsession. James Potter was a wealthy pureblood heir, who was athletically gifted, popular, and
handsome to boot. So why was he wasting all this time on one girl who wouldn't even look his
way? It simply did not make sense to Regulus. Blood traitor or not, James Potter would have been a
catch for any girl in the Wizarding World. Yet he trails around like a puppy dog after a muggle-
born who had no interest in him whatsoever? Regulus would call that stupidity at its finest.

Regulus watched as Lily Evans stormed out of the cabin, obviously mad, at whatever asinine
pickup line Potter had attempted to use on her. James looked confused, dumbfounded, perplexed
even, that somehow his charm could not break the barrier that was Lily Evans. Absolutely Pathetic.
He began heading towards the door about the same time that Potter was. They had an awkward
moment where they both tried to get through the door at the same time. Which lead to Regulus
stepping back and letting James go through first. However, he didn't expect James to stop outside
and wait for Regulus to follow him through the doorway.

He looked at Potter's stupid friendly expression, feeling the bitterness curl up in his stomach.
Regulus glared at the Gryffindor, “What do you want, Potter?”

Potter looked almost smug, a completely different facial expression than he wore only two minutes
ago when Evans had stormed off. He seemed to be in the mood to tease Regulus, “What do you
mean Reggie? I just thought I better make sure you made it out alright, considering you zoned off
the entire meeting. Now don't get me wrong, I respect that those meetings are more boring than
Moony described, but considering this was your first meeting maybe you should have paid a little
more attention.”

He laughed loudly, it was a booming sound. Regulus had heard Potter laugh before but that was
usually from across the Great Hall, up close it was clear that the Gryffindor laughed with his entire
being. Regulus was amused by what James had said and he really didn't like the tone that he used.
He sounded like a condescending dick, more than usual anyway. James, not noticing the ice in
Regulus’ glare continued speaking in his superior tone, “You’re just lucky that Jess doesn't have
much faith in my ability to pay attention or you would have been fucked after the feast tonight.”

Regulus scowled at him, secretly hoping Potter and his big head would implode from the heat of
the stare. How dare he speak to Regulus in that way? As if Regulus was a helpless little kid that
needed his hand held as he crossed the street. The absolute disrespect in his voice made Regulus
livid. The Black family's temper wasn't a myth, but Regulus had never felt it quite as heavy as he
did when he heard James Potter's smug tone. Sirius was always the one that had the real temper,
the one that could snap and bite your head off in just a matter of minutes. Maybe it was because
now that Sirius was officially out of the house, Regulus was finally growing the family temper or
maybe it just took the special James fucking Potter to bring it out in him.

Regulus mustered all the venom he had inherited from Walpurga Black before he spoke next,
“Listen you smug piece of shit, nobody talks to me that way. Especially not some egotistical
Gryffindor idiot. And if you ever call me Reggie again, you better have your Will finalized."

Regulus whipped around about to strut back to his compartment when Potter began clapping as if
he was applauding Regulus rather than mocking him, “Wow that wasn’t dramatic at all, bravo. Oh
and sweetheart?" Regulus glared turning back to the complete ass, "I'm not egotistical. To be
egotistical you need to exaggerate your good qualities, I just tell it how it is.”

Regulus let out a sharp cruel laugh, “Please, Potter if I wanted to kill myself I'd climb up to your
ego and jump to your IQ. And don't fucking call me sweetheart.”

Regulus didn't know what it was about his tone that told Potter he was joking, but the boy barked
out a booming laugh almost immediately. He laughed as if he'd never heard something so funny in
his life. He laughed as if Regulus was a comedian and James was his audience. Regulus hated his
damn laugh and he despised being laughed at, “What exactly is so funny, Potter?”

"You, Reggie. Merlin Sirius and you are so much alike, more than I even thought. I remember the
first time I called him a superstar. I thought it was hilarious, but he certainly did not. It was at
dinner and he ended up putting a fork to my throat until I apologized. I guess it's that classic Black
temper, but no need to get angry. They're just harmless nicknames, and besides, I know Sirius calls
you Reggie.”

Regulus couldn't help but flush at the comparison. The idea that Sirius’ best friend thought that
they were alike was insulting. It made Regulus angry, angry because his brother had left him, and
now even when Sirius was out of Regulus’ life, he was still being compared to him. He spoke
slowly wanting James to get this through his thick skull, “We are nothing alike. For example, I
didn't abandon my family as he did and he doesn't call me Reggie anymore. He doesn't get that
privilege anymore and you never had it.”

James’ face became very serious at Regulus's words. Regulus didn't know how he could have
possibly forgotten that Sirius had left Regulus in that damn house, considering Sirius had been at
the Potter's all Summer. Obviously, Regulus wouldn't just forgive SIirus for what he had done.
How could he forget that Regulus was all alone because of Sirius? Did he think Regulus wouldn't
be angry? Did he think Sirius would still be his brother after he had abandoned him?

Potter's next words were delivered in an indignant tone, “Come on Regulus, like you didn't know
that he was drowning in that house. I think you and I both know that he wouldn't have survived
another year there. I know you are your parent's little puppet, but even you must've realized that.
You are not unintelligent, so don't play dumb with me.”

Potter's words were like water thrown on a fire, they quickly simmered his temper. Regulus didn't
really think Sirius would have been dead if he had remained in that house for another year.
However, he knew that if Sirius had remained, then his spirit would have been broken, kind of like
Regulus’ already was. Sirius always had a more vibrant personality than Regulus anyways, so it
really would be a shame if it disappeared. If one of their spirits had to be broken, then it made
sense that Regulus' would be the one to go, he was never worth as much as his brother was.
Regulus spent his entire life walking three steps behind Sirius and when Sirius was no longer there
Regulus received the full brunt of his parents. Obedience and discipline, enough for two sons
forced onto one.

Regulus didn't actually want his brother’s spirit to break, he just never wanted to be alone. Sirius
was the one person Regulus knew would always be there for him. Even after they drifted apart,
they were still brothers in the end. Then Sirius left, now he had no brother but Sirius got a whole
new family. Regulus attempted to wipe the emotions off his face, hoping that Potter hadn't already
noticed. Regulus's voice almost comes out in a whisper, “Yeah, Potter I know. I'm the bad guy. I'm
the villain. I'm the reason everything that anything bad ever happened to Sirius. So it's almost
poetic, then. Now I'm the only one left in that house. Good for him. Later Potter.”

Regulus turned and rushed away before James Potter could see the broken look on his face. Mother
and father always said the Blacks aren't weak and nobody should ever see your crown fall.

When Regulus finally gets back to his compartment, he is almost immediately assaulted with noise.
Damn Regulus had forgotten how loud Evan was. Barty Crouch jr. and Evan Rosier were the only
Slytherins that Regulus could actually stand for longer than a few minutes, luckily they happened
to be his roommates. Evan Rosier came from a family that was rather similar to the Black family,
which meant his parents didn't mind his affiliation with Evan. There were so many people his
parents didn't approve of that Regulus couldn't be friends with. The few families that his mother
and father did approve of happened to have sons that Regulus despised. The Mulicibers, the
Averys, and the Notts to name a few. Regulus hated them. They were cruel to everyone and just
plain ignorant. Being a blood supremacist was bad enough but Regulus didn't understand why they
felt the need to be so obvious. It often got them in trouble with the staff.

Evan was more forgiving of this behavior, unfortunately. While he wasn't exactly obvious about
his dislike for anyone not pureblood, he seemed to understand why they felt the need to be
obvious. Rosier was someone that Regulus wasn't sure if he would be a lifelong friend. Sometimes
Evan did things that Regulus couldn't pretend to be okay with and sometimes he was the friend
Regulus met on the train in the first year. Evan could be fiercely loyal or he could betray you in a
heartbeat. Sometimes being friends with Evan was more like being friends with two completely
different people. Regulus never was quite sure which Evan he was going to get.

Barty was another story altogether. He wasn't from the same type of family as Regulus, while he
was a pureblood his father was very vocal about his dislike for the dark arts and anyone tied to it.
Barty’s father was a political climber, he couldn't have anything damage his chances of becoming
Minister of Magic, especially his son. These days the Slytherin house was considered a synonym
for the dark arts. When Barty was sorted into Slytherin his father was so disappointed, that he
proceeded to separate himself from his son as much as possible. Regulus remembered in the first
year when he would hear Barty crying in his bed with his curtain closed the first week of school.
Barty didn't deserve how his father treated him. Now, Barty does everything he can to separate
himself from his father as well. He was whip-smart but he often did foolish things hoping to get
back at his father. He also used the word Mudblood as if he were describing the weather, which
had always made Regulus a bit uncomfortable. The sad part was that Regulus wasn't actually sure
Barty cared much about blood supremacy or if he just wanted to be the opposite of his father.

As he walked into the compartment, Rosier stood up clapping him on the back, “Black, where have
you been? We've been waiting for you for like an hour, I want to tell you about this chick I met.”
Regulus smirked slightly at Evan's enthusiasm before quickly responding that he was at a prefect
meeting. Evan snorted at the idea of Regulus being at a Pompous meeting, as they used to call it.
He quickly moved back to telling Regulus about the girl he'd met, "Well, I was in France and I met
this beautiful French pureblood. She wasn’t too bright, but who needs that in a wife am I right? Her
name is Melanie Cortaca and she's perfect.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at his friend's forgetfulness, he drawled in a sarcastic tone, “Right Rosier,
I'm sure that your parents will be completely okay with you ditching the girl you've been engaged
to since you were four and taking up some Frenchy.”

Barty burst out laughing at the offended expression Evan adopted. He smirked as Regulus came
down to sit next to him, ”Wow Regs, I have missed you. Who else would be around to tell Rosier
that he is an imbecile."

Regulus quirked an eyebrow up at him, smirking back, "Well you always could."

"I could never! I guess I am just not as heartless as you."

Regulus rolled his eyes at his friend's mock innocence. If any of the three of them were heartless it
was Barty. The boy hardly ever missed an opportunity to point out when they were being idiotic.
Barty chuckled a bit before swinging his arm around Regulus's shoulder, "So you were at your
prefect meeting? Always figured you'd be the prefect of the bunch. Such a stickler for rules and so
damn boring.”
 Regulus doesn't miss a beat and promptly tells Barty to shove off.

A second later, Rosier, who has gotten out of his stupor finally responds, “Come on Regs, you
don't know. Maybe I can convince them. Well, probably not, but still she gave fantastic head. So
not a complete waste. Fingers crossed that Allison Private can do those things with her tongue as
well. Otherwise, I might have to have a side chick when we're married. How was the meeting
anyway?”

Regulus laughed at Evans's ability to say so much in one sentence without really saying anything of
substance. The three of them spent most of the train ride catching up about each other's summers.
Regulus had skillfully avoided mentioning Sirius until Evan decided to bring it up, "Hey Regs, this
is sort of awkward but there have been some rumors going around and I feel like I should ask. Did
Sirius leave? I mean, I knew he hung out with blood traitors and half-bloods, but did he actually
leave the family and give up being the heir?”

Regulus could tell by the glare Barty sent towards Evan that the two of them had been discussing it
before he had gotten there. He didn't know why he was so surprised, of course, everyone would
know about what had happened last Christmas sooner or later. He was surprised it took them this
long, but when Sirius didn't show up with Regulus and his father, people must have gathered their
own conclusion.

Regulus had never told them when it happened last year so he hoped they wouldn't get angry at
him for keeping it a secret so long, "Yeah actually, he left last Christmas. I never said anything
because it was all kind of fresh, but he's been taken off the family tapestry and everything. It's
official."

The boys didn't say anything but Evan looked uncomfortable and Barty gave him a pitying
expression. He hated being pitied. Thank Merlin Evan did not struggle with finding words, no
matter how ridiculous they were. His awkward expression morphed into a hesitant smile before he
was full-on grinning, "Wait, doesn't that make you the heir? Shit Regs, you are going to be filthy
rich!"

Regulus couldn't help but laugh at his friend's enthusiasm on the matter which seemed to be
enough to bring a change of subject forward as they neared Hogwarts fo his fifth year.

Chapter End Notes

Okay so if you had originally read this chapter before 4/26/22, then you might notice
some changes if you reread this chapter. I decided that some of my earlier chapters
could be edited a little better so I will slowly be working on those as I write my new
chapter. I will be adding more details and rewording things, but nothing should change
that drastically. If this was your first time reading this chapter, then I hope you
enjoyed it!
 Pretty boy
Chapter Notes

If you read this chapter before 5/17/2022, it most likely looks very different. I am
currently editing and putting more detail into some of my earlier chapters as I continue
updating. Many of my early chapters are short and lacking and detail, so while the
chapters won't change the current storyline, they will give you more detail.

James

James loved the first night back at Hogwarts, there was just something about it that made him all
tingly inside. Something about walking into the Great Hall just made him happy. His favorite part
was seeing his friends, even though Peter and Remus visited multiple times this summer and Sirius
officially lived with the Potters now. It was still great to have them back in one place again, plus he
had missed his other friends from the quidditch team and the girls. He only ever really got to see
them at school, so it was great to get to talk to everyone again.

James loved having Sirius living with him, they had always felt like more than friends, like
brothers. Now that he lived in the same house as James they finally felt like actual brothers. They
had spent practically every moment of the summer together and James couldn't have been happier
about it. People might assume that since he grew up an only child he would have trouble sharing,
but that had never been a problem for James. James was the type of child that always wanted others
to be as happy as he was, so he would often let others play with his toys, even to the point that they
broke them. Sirius always said that James was too trusting of people, but James thought that it
wouldn't hurt Sirius to trust a little more.

Speaking of Sirius, James couldn’t help but think about his brother, like his actual blood brother,
Regulus Black. Their interaction on the train had been volatile, to say the least. Regulus Black was
generally quiet, he didn’t seem to talk to anyone but his two friends Evan Rosier and Barty Crouch.
He had always seemed to be the complete opposite of Sirius in manners and beliefs. Where Sirius
was loud and always looking for fun, Regulus was quiet and serious, even severe. So it was
surprising when the little Black blew up at James earlier. It shocked him enough to bring up Sirius,
which was probably not the brightest idea in retrospect, considering the Black brothers always
seemed to be on thin ice with each other.

That wasn't strictly true, the Black brothers used to be closer than anyone before Regulus's first
year. It was odd actually, that their relationship had decayed as much as it had. James remembered
in his first year at Hogwarts, that Sirius would never shut up about his little brother. Honestly, it
was almost like Sirius thought that the boy had hung the moon at ten years old. He used to brag to
James about his little brother and how talented he was. He used to tell James all about how when
Regulus came to school, they would have to let him in on their pranks, because Regulus loved a
good prank. James can admit now that he had felt a little jealous of the brother Sirius had described.
He had never had any siblings and when he got to Hogwarts, he met Sirius and he finally felt like
he had the brother he always wanted, except Sirius already had a brother.

When Regulus finally did come to Hogwarts, James couldn't help but be disappointed. Regulus
Black, even at eleven was handsome in the classic Black family way. He looked a lot like Sirius,
except he was skinnier and while Sirius looked more rugged, Regulus looked prim and proper.
Regulus was in two words, stuck up. He was a classic pureblood brat, that looked at James like he
was gum on the bottom of his shoe. James honestly couldn’t imagine that the stuck-up Regulus was
the same brother Sirius had bragged about for an entire year. Regulus had sat with the Marauders
on the train ride his first year, during which Sirius talked nonstop about how great it was going to
be to have Reggie there with him. Unfortunately, Sirius forgot one crucial piece of the equation,
Regulus was still a Black and would be expected to be sorted into Slytherin. When Regulus got
sorted into Slytherin all of Sirius’ dreams floated away. He was devastated that his brother now
lived in the snakepit and would for seven years.

James remembered his genuine attempt at cheering Sirius up, even though he himself didn't see the
appeal of the youngest Black. Sirius had cried that night, which had been the first time James had
seen him do that since their first night at Hogwarts. James recalled the way Regulus's eyes had
searched for Sirius's the moment the hat had called out Slytherin. Sirius had looked almost
disgusted and the youngest Black's hopeful eyes looked away, saddened. James had always thought
that the reaction had been a bit harsh, considering he still was his brother.

The brother's relationship decayed pretty naturally after that. In Regulus’ first year, Sirius and he
would meet up occasionally, trying to rekindle their relationship from before Hogwarts. James
always noticed when Sirius had come back from a meeting with his little brother, he seemed more
stressed out than happy. At the time James didn't understand why Sirius would possibly be stressed
after those meetings, but now he knew that Sirius had been afraid of losing his brother. He was
scared of losing the boy that he had always described to James. He must have noticed the
differences between how his brother acted when they were kids to then. James didn't know if
Sirius had thought Regulus was amazing before he started Hogwarts, because he didn't ever see
anybody else except for his cousins. Or if Regulus really had changed during that last year. Either
way, it was all kind of sad to watch. It wasn't like James really liked the kid, in fact, he still thought
he was a stuck-up brat, but it was still upsetting to hear how Sirius's descriptions of his brother
changed from year to year.

"Wait till you meet my brother, James. He is the best!."

"Reggie is pretty brilliant, James. He's the top of his class"

"Reg made the quidditch team, too bad it's for Slytherin."
"Reg can be a bit of a prat, but he's still my brother."

"Regulus has developed a condition, he can't seem to get his head out of his own arse."

"Fucking spoiled brat! I swear James, he is obsessed with being my mother's puppet."

James had actually heard Sirius say all of these things each year they were at Hogwarts to now.
They stopped talking in school sometime in third year, but Sirius said they still talked at home.
James sort of wondered what the two boys could've possibly talked about, after arguing so much at
school. The arguments were always the same; Regulus wanted Sirius to behave so as to not anger
their parents which he refused to do, Sirius wanted Regulus to stop obeying his mother's every
command which he refused to do, and they both wanted the other to admit their wrongdoings and
to become brothers again which they both refused to do. James always privately thought that the
Black brothers were too stubborn for their own good. If he had been born with a sibling, brother, or
sister, he would have never let him go the way they did to each other.

When Sirius ran away to the Potters last Christmas, he told James that he had begged Regulus to
come with him to which his brother had turned up his nose and told him to leave. Sirius didn't
much like to talk about that last interaction which made James wonder if there was more to it. He
didn't see how Regulus could possibly want to be in that house any more than he had already been,
whether he followed his parent's rules or not. Sirius didn't like discussing the punishments, not that
James couldn't guess how bad they were, but he often talked about the behavior that was expected
of them and implied there were severe consequences if the rules were not followed. James couldn't
believe that any parents could treat their own children that way. Sirius claimed that he had always
stuck up for his brother and that he always would take the punishment over letting Regulus get
hurt. James wondered what the house had been like the last few months, without Sirius to take the
brunt of Walpurga's anger.

Regulus Black was something of an enigma at Hogwarts. He was referred to by some as the
Slytherin Prince, but he didn't seem to be all that popular. The noble House of Black was one of the
longest-standing and wealthiest wizarding families in Great Britain. Regulus had the Black family
beauty and James knew that he was at the top of his class. He had made prefect, plus he was damn
good at Quidditch as well. Despite all of that he only had two friends. He never seemed to
particularly enjoy talking to any of his classmates, like they were all beneath him. James couldn't
blame him as he didn't think too much of most Slytherin students either.

That was another key difference between Sirius and Regulus. Sirius couldn't go an hour without
talking to someone, while Regulus could probably go a week without saying a word to anyone with
no problems. He was pretty popular with the Hogwarts staff though, professors seemed to adore
him. This wasn't particularly surprising to James as Regulus wasn't one to misbehave in class, and
had been described as brilliant by almost every professor. James had heard Minerva McGonagall
say it herself, and her standards for excellence were high. Sirius always said that Regulus was a
genius and a prodigy as well. James had never realized how much he knew about the youngest
Black until now.

He wondered where all this information had come from. Was it possible that all these years James
had been paying such close attention to the relationship between the two brothers that he had
actually learned quite a lot about Regulus? That was sort of a concerning thought, but James tried
not to dwell on it all that much. After all, he only ever thought about the Slytherin boy when he
saw him, which couldn't be that often as they weren't in the same house or year.

*********************************************

James' vision suddenly went black, he thought for a moment his glasses had fallen off, but they
were still sitting on his nose. He had just come down from unpacking his trunk to join the rest of
Gryffindor in the common room. He had spent most of the welcoming feast talking to the other
Marauders, but he hadn't had the chance to chat with anyone else. He quickly discovered that the
reason for his sudden blindness was not his naturally poor vision, but a pair of hands covering his
eyes from behind. He didn't have to wonder who it was for long, as he heard a slightly low, raspy
voice calling out, "Guess who, pretty boy!"

He couldn't help but laugh at Marlene Mckinnon's distinctive voice calling him a pretty boy. She
had been calling him by that ridiculous nickname since their first year when she caught him fixing
his hair before going to flirt with Lily Evans. She had teased him mercilessly, so much so that he
had hated her for a while, but he realized pretty quickly that it was all good-natured teasing.
Marlene didn't bother speaking with people she didn't like, let alone giving them nicknames. When
he discovered that her teasing was actually a sign of fondness, he had found a whole new outlook
on their relationship. She was now one of his favorite people, not to mention a kickass seeker.

As soon as he spun around, she threw her arms around him, pulling him into a hug. He winced at
the way she seemed to make everything, even hugging a competition, by squeezing him with all her
might. He couldn't help but laugh fondly at her competitive nature. When she pulled back from the
hug she picked back up on her favorite pastime, teasing James, "Wow, pretty boy, I think you've
got even prettier than last year. Tell me, have you been using your father's hair potions?"

James, rolled his eyes at this because really it was very obvious that he had not been using
Sleakeazy, the potion his father had invented for unruly hair. His hair was and would probably
always be untamable, but he never minded that. His father had actually invented the potion
specifically for Potter hair because it truly was untamable, but James had always hated the heavy
feel the potion gave his hair, so he never used it. He smirked and shot her a wink, "You know I
don't need to use potions to look pretty, Marls. It just comes naturally for some people."

She groaned at his arrogance, but her eyes held amusement as she socked him in the arm, "You're
such an idiot, Potter. You are lucky I missed you so much, otherwise, I would've hit you a lot
harder for that little show."

James laughed as she twirled her wand in the air, small fireworks popping out, in her roundabout
way to compare James's egotism to a firework display. She had made the comparison before, but
last time she had even made a list of reasons why they were comparable. Apparently, James was
also flashy for a short period of time before he was plain James again, hurtful. Apparently, his
arrogance also came in multiple levels, depending on his mood just like fireworks come in many
different colors and shapes. Really she had put way too much thought into the topic, but he had to
admit she had made some good points, not that he would change his ways for her.

Marlene McKinnon was, to say the least, incredible. She was whip-smart and viciously cutting with
her words. She told you the truth, even if it sometimes hurt to hear it. She was ridiculously loyal to
her friends and you would not want to be on the other end of her wand if you hurt one of them. He
was quite proud to count himself as one of the lucky few that she was loyal to, because she didn't
give that loyalty away for free. She was on the quidditch team with James as a seeker and James
quite liked her as a teammate. Marlene McKinnon was very pretty, though she had always been
more of a tomboy than anything. She didn't put a whole lot of effort into her hair and she never
wore makeup, but she had the sort of natural beauty people would kill for. She had long blonde
hair, there seemed to be a permanent smirk fixed on her face all the time, and her blue eyes always
sparkled in mischief.

“Marls, I missed you too. Have you been training over the summer?” She gave him a look as if she
couldn't believe that in the first two minutes of seeing each other again, he was bringing up
Quidditch.

He knew that everybody thought he was quidditch obsessed and maybe he was, but since he was
officially captain he wanted to make sure that his quidditch team this year, was the best that
Hogwarts had ever seen. That included having his seeker in top shape, so he responded
condescendingly, “I know I am overbearing, but do you really want to let Slytherin beat us this
year? Come on, I know that you want to see baby Black's face when you finally beat him to the
snitch."

She snorted loudly and then conceded, "Fuck fine. You are right, there is nothing that would bring
me more joy than to see that pompous ass lose."

James chuckled and the two of them quickly slipped into a conversation about this year's quidditch
team, until Marlene suddenly squealed. Sirius' arms wrapped around her from behind, lifting her
slightly off the ground. Sirius wasn't the tallest Marauder by any means, in fact, the only one he
had beat was Peter, barely. However, Marlene was barely five feet so he had no problem lifting her
off the ground. He kissed her neck as he set her down and James had to look away when she turned
and suddenly the two of them were snogging in the middle of the common room. As much as
James loved the both of them, he was never a huge fan of PDA, especially because one of them
was practically his brother.

Sirius and Marlene had begun dating sometime the year before, James hadn’t been sure they would
last throughout the summer, but Sirius had spent a lot of time writing letters to Marlene so James
had figured they were still hot and heavy That was before he had just gotten the clear display of
how hot and heavy they were.

He felt another arm drop around his neck, he started a bit before he turned and saw Mary
McDonald smiling brightly at him, "Hey handsome."

James grinned back at her and pulled her into a half hug, "Hey Mary. It's great to see you! How
have you been?"

She laughed in her breathy way that had always made James think of sex for some reason, "Oh I've
been great, darling. Met a boy or three this summer." She paused and winked at him, "Muggle boys
are the best kissers, I swear. None of them worked out, but it was such a good time. How was your
summer?"

James rubbed the back of his neck, never really knowing how to respond when Mary talked about
the boys she had dated. She was always very open about them to James, he really had no idea why,
because she never mentioned them to Remus or Sirius. Peter though, also got a lot of the details
about her many boyfriends. He settled on giving her a natural smile, or what he hoped was a
natural smile, "It was great! Having Sirius there was amazing. Plus Peter and Remus visited a few
times as well."

Her grin faltered a bit and she lowered her voice, suddenly much more serious, "And how is Sirius
doing? Is he okay being there? He's not having any thoughts of going back is he?"

James struggled to hold a natural smile on his face, because he had been worried about how Sirius
had coped as well, "Yeah I think so. He seemed okay or at least he will be, with more time. I don't
think you have to worry about him going back, he would never do that."

She raised her eyebrows a little doubting, "I’d like to think that too, but I mean his brother is still
there."

James furrowed his eyebrows, not seeing the correlation, "They don't even get along anymore,
there's no way he would go back for him."

She patted his arm, smiling softly, "I don't know, if it were my brother then there's not much that
could stop me from going back for him."

James was a little shellshocked at that idea. Maybe it's because he never had a brother of his own,
though Sirius was as close as one could be, he had never considered the idea that Sirius might
decide he needed to save Regulus too. James hoped Sirius didn't get that idea into his head because
you can't save someone who doesn't know they need to be saved.

Mary must've noticed his contemplation and thought she better leave him to it. She smiled at him,
back to her bright smile once more, patting him on the arm, "It's great to see you, James. As much
as I would love to talk more, I see Peter, and I'm getting the urge to tell him all the gossip I've
heard lately. See you later, honey."

She kissed his cheek and skipped off to find Peter, leaving James to his own thoughts. He shelved
them for a later time, rather quickly, because this really wans the time for him to contemplate that
mess. It had been great seeing Mary and he wasn't the slightest bit surprised that she was going to
find Peter. Peter and Mary were as thick as thieves when it came to gossip. James didn't know
anyone that loved gossip more than those two, and they both seemed to have their own ways of
securing it.

Mary McDonald was as amazing as her best friend, who happened to Marlene. Mary was almost
always fun, but she seemed to know precisely when the time to be serious was. She cared about
people so much and James loved her for it. She was a very quick-witted and wicked dueler if it
came to that, though she wasn't usually one for violence. She was a muggle-born that happened to
have a brother, Magnus, that was also born a wizard, which was very rare for non-wizarding
families.

She was very confident when it came to most things, especially guys. Mary had dated many men,
but very few had she seemed to actually like for more than a few weeks. Before Remus had come
out as gay in his fourth year, Mary and he had hooked up, but luckily it hadn’t meant anything for
either of them, so there didn't seem to be any awkwardness between them. Mary was decidedly
gorgeous with her long curly black hair, flawless dark skin, large brown eyes, and her captivating
smile. James had to admit that if he hadn’t been obsessed with Lily Evans since their first year,
then he would probably be obsessed with Mary.

James turned back to look for his friends, when he caught a glimpse of Lily Evans in a
conversation with the head girl Jessie Blunt, in the corner. The head boy was in Ravenclaw and
James honestly could not remember his name, Merlin was just as bad as Regulus. Lily looked
incredibly beautiful and it was obvious that she had matured over the summer. Her long red hair
looked vibrant against her tanned freckled face. She appeared to have grown a few inches, which
James appreciated. He had never seen the appeal of snogging someone a lot shorter, given that you
would have to be leaned over the entire time.

She was laughing at something Jess had said and James was treated to the sight of her enchanting
smile. James thought that Lily was by far the most interesting girl at Hogwarts. She was a muggle-
born, just like Mary, but she was constantly surprising the bigots in the school with this fact as she
was the best in their year. She was incredibly bright and she often dismantled James’ self-
confidence with just her words. He had known since the day he met her in his first year, that she
was the one for him. His parents had also met in Hogwarts, in their fourth year and his father
always told it like, he had known that his mom was going to be his wife from that moment. His
mother told it like, she couldn't stand him for at least a year before she finally reciprocated his
feelings. James figured this must be the same case with Lily Evans, all he had to do was wait.

Lily was really good friends with Marlene and Mary, as well as Dorcas Meadows who was a
Ravenclaw in their year. Mary and Dorcas had hit it off while Mary was dating some Ravenclaw,
spending a lot of time in their common room. Mary had begun bringing Dorcas to the Gryffindor
common room to hang out, shortly after she broke up with her Ravenclaw boyfriend. Dorcas had
become fast friends with Lily because she was clever as they come. Dorcas had a dry wit that made
it impossible not to laugh whenever she spoke, though she never laughed at her own jokes. She was
blunt and straightforward, which reminded James of Marlene. You'd think that the two of them
would've hit it off right away, considering their personalities, but Marlene had remained distant
from Dorcas for months before accepting her into their group.

Dorcas wasn't in the common room right now, so James would have to catch up with her later. She
was also a very pretty girl, but she always seemed way too mature for any boys in Hogwarts. She
had dark skin and long braided dark hair. She had large brown eyes, that you could melt into. She
was also very tall for a sixteen-year-old girl, reaching James’s height of 183 cm. This made her all
the better keeper on the Ravenclaw quidditch team.

He turned away from Lily, after staring for far too long before his eyes caught on Sirius and
Marlene still snogging as their lives depend on it. He groaned and caught Remus’s eyes, who also
looked miserable at the sight their friends were causing. Remus Lupin was James’ most pensive
friend, which made him the most mysterious of them all.

James loved Remus with all his heart, but sometimes he wished his friend would lean on him when
he needed it. Instead, James had to watch his friend for any hint that he needed help so that he
could be there for him when he needed it. Remus was the first one James had met on the train and
he would always have a special place in James’s heart. Remus was tall and lanky, with a scarred
face that Sirius insisted made him look enigmatic. Remus had a great smile, though he rarely
smiled carefreely. James understood why, as Remus had more going on than any of his friends, but
that made it all the more difficult to interpret his friend's thoughts.
Remus Lupin was a werewolf and had been one since he was five years old. He had a very difficult
life and unfortunately unless the entire Wizard community changed their opinions on werewolves,
that wouldn't change for him. Remus was the best person he knew and the boy was way too smart
to be held back by such prejudice. Remus was second in their year and he had a particular gift for
the Defence of the Dark Arts.

Remus was sitting on one of the armchairs in front of the fire, slouching lazily as he gazed at the
couple snogging not far from him, looking distinctly upset. James couldn't blame him, he didn't
exactly love seeing two of his close friends snog either.

Sirius was the only person in the world James would call his soulmate, not even Lily Evans. Sirius
and he was like two halves of the same person. Sirius was vibrant and creative, James truly hadn’t
known that people like him existed until his first year. When he met Sirius they were instantly
cohesive together. They pranked people, they practiced magic, and they could even finish each
other's sentences.

At the time James didn't know how bad Sirius had it at home, but he had always wondered why the
boy hid his post whenever he got a letter from his family. When James finally discovered how
Sirius’s home life truly was, he realized that Sirius’ personality didn't come from his family as
most people did. Sirius was vibrant and creative despite his family, not because of them. It was
made all the more clear when James had first met Regulus, who was nothing like Sirius except that
he come from the same family.

Sirius was over five centimeters shorter than James, and he had shoulder-length wavy black hair.
He had porcelain skin and a flawless complexion. His eyes were a light grey that always twinkled
in mischief. Sirius was a very handsome boy and nearly every girl in the school thought so. Sirius
was also a bit loose when it came to women. He dated or hooked up with a lot of girls until he got
bored with them, which was usually pretty quickly.

Marlene and his relationship was slightly different from Sirius’ usual routine. Marlene and he had
been dating longer than he had dated anyone else. James was quite glad for this because Marlene
was actually a close friend of theirs and James really didn't want to see Sirius treat her like crap, not
that she would take that. James had warned Sirius away from dating any of their close friends as it
could create a terrible dynamic between all of them, but Sirius had done it anyways.

James looked away from the couple just as Sirius snuck his hand down to Marlene's ass. He
shivered at the thought of the two of them and wandered over to sit on the armrest of Remus’ chair.
Remus looked up at him, then motioned to the couple, “Hey James, isn't it great to be back?”

James snorted at his friends' sarcasm, “Yeah, I never thought I would miss seeing couples grope
each other in the common room.”
Remus rolled his eyes before he began telling James about the classes he was taking this year.
James was only half-listening, because in truth for as much as he loved Remus, he did not want to
hear him talk about Arithmancy. As Remus talked, James’s eyes wandered over to Peter and Mary,
who were having a deep conversation on the couch across from them. They looked practically
giddy at whatever information Peter was telling Mary at the moment.

Peter Pettigrew was the final member of their self-named group, the Marauders. Peter seriously had
a heart of gold and James didn't know if there was anyone he would rather have his back. Peter was
ridiculously loyal, so much so that he probably should've been in Hufflepuff. James was very glad
Peter had ended up in Gryffindor instead, as he didn't know if their group could have functioned
without Peter there to keep them in check.

Peter was always the one who made sure the group stayed together and happy. Whenever Sirius
and Remus fought, he stepped in to convince them to make up. Whenever everyone got annoyed at
James’ repetitive conversation topics of either quidditch or Lily Evans, he would change the subject
to a topic everyone would prefer. Whenever anyone of them got too sad about life outside of
Hogwarts, Peter was always there to cheer them up.

Peter was the shortest of all of them, Sirius only had him beat by a few centimeters, but he was still
a respectable height. He was slightly plumper than the other boys, but none of them would ever say
he was overweight. He had a bit of a babyface, but he had the best smile of them all. His eyes
never really held mischief like the other boys, but his baby blues always seemed earnest. He had
shaggy sandy blond hair, that was always getting in his eyes. He wasn't a ladies' man like Sirius,
but he had dated a few girls. He was more like James in the sense that he wanted to be with one girl
he loved rather than ten girls that he didn't love.

James hoped that he would get an opportunity to find that one love before the war consumed him.

It was a depressing thought for a sixteen-year-old to have but that's what life with war was. He had
noticed a lot of differences in his house this past year. His father had joined the order of the
Phoenix. Even though he was a great wizard, he wasn't exactly a soldier. Fleamont Potter had taken
a break from his usual job of a potioneer for the most popular hair care product in wizarding
Britain, to go on missions for the Order of the Phoenix. James’s mother was a healer for the Order
and while she wasn’t necessarily in battles, she was often called into to deal with the aftermath.
Which James almost thought was worse sometimes.

He knew that his parents were strong and brave, and when he graduated he would join the Order
alongside them. James wasn't exactly scared of dying, but he was scared of dying without making
his mark on the world first, which was pretty hard to do when you were sixteen. Sure, his pranks
would probably become legendary and people would probably always know about the Marauders
at Hogwarts, but he wanted to make a real mark. He wanted to be a hero in someone's story. His
friends were pretty much on the same page as him. They were all planning on joining the order
after they graduated, Dumbledore had recruited them specifically.

James was glad that he would get a chance to fight and help make a difference, but he was also sort
of sad that he won't get to live a normal life after Hogwarts for at least a while. He planned to
become a professional quidditch player, but that all depended on how the war turned out. James
was pretty sure that when the war got kicked up a notch that quidditch would be canceled anyway,
so he wasn't worried about missing a season. He wondered what state he would be in after the war.
He hoped that he would be in good enough shape to continue living his dream of being a
professional athlete, but there are a lot worse things than not getting to live your dream, he could
end up not getting to live at all.

He tried to keep hoping that everything would be fine, that everyone would live and everyone
would get to enjoy their lives after that monster Voldemort was dead. He tried not to think too
much about the war while he was at Hogwarts. He knew that once he left Hogwarts, everything
would be about the war and he had to try to enjoy life before that happened as much as possible. So
instead he switched his thoughts to the upcoming school year; to being a prefect alongside Lily
Evans, to quidditch and winning the Quidditch Cup, and to a lot of Marauder's pranks that would
go down in Hogwarts history.

Sirius joined them after he and Marlene had finally parted and they all headed up to their dorm
room. They spent hours discussing Marauder’s pranks for the year, that was until Peter had fallen
asleep, they could tell from the sounds of his snoring. After laughing about Peter’s ability to fall
asleep whenever his head hit the pillow they all decided to go to bed. Before James fell asleep, he
thought about the year. He knew that this year would be like no other. That this is the year that
everything would be different. Something crazy would happen and he would love it. He couldn't
wait for his sixth year of Hogwarts.
 Prefect Rounds

Reggie

Regulus’ first week of school was stressful and he had spent nearly all his free time studying.
Regulus had way too much to do this year with OWLS and his classes in general. Classes were
already much more advanced and it was only the first week. His course load was immense and he
had to work his arse off to get flawless grades. Not to mention all the extra studying he had to do to
get prepared for the OWL exams. Plus it seemed as if he always had either prefect duties or
quidditch practice to attend to.

Regulus was getting so stressed out that he had actually considered quitting the quidditch team. If
he wasn't studying for the OWL's then he was at quidditch practice. It was probably the only
activity that his parents wouldn’t cause a fuss about him quitting. They didn’t love the fact that
their heir was going around playing on brooms instead of focusing on his future. Regulus was sure
the only reason they didn’t make him quit was because he had been on the team for three years
before he even became the heir of the family. Even though it would free up his time for studying
and maybe he'd be able to get more than a few hours of sleep.

Regulus didn't want to quit the team. Quidditch was the only thing he actually enjoyed doing at this
point in his life. Quidditch was one of the few things Regulus got to do that his parents didn't
necessarily approve of. He enjoyed quidditch greatly and it made it all the better that it was one
thing that he didn’t have to discuss with his parents ever. They didn't care about quidditch in the
slightest. As long as Regulus could still perform his heir duties, he could continue playing
quidditch. He knew that he was talented and in a perfect world maybe he could even continue
playing Quidditch after school ended. He knew that there was no way his parents would ever
approve of that as a career, especially now that he was the heir instead of Sirius. Still, he couldn't
make himself quit, no matter how stressed he was. He had to continue, so instead, he spent every
waking moment of free time studying.

It started to drain on him. His studying late at night, his prefect duties, and his three-hour-long
quidditch practices were becoming more troublesome for Regulus. For the most part, his friends
left him alone to study, they didn’t comment about him staying up half the night and skipping
meals to study more. Evan only seemed to care about Regulus’s schedule when it affected his own
grades. Regulus had been helping Evan with his homework since they were in their first year.
Regulus didn't know if Evan would have passed his final exams if it weren't for Regulus. Barty
was slightly more concerned with Regulus’s habits than Evan and often tried to distract Regulus, in
an attempt to make him stop studying. While he appreciated that Barty cared at least a little about
Regulus working himself to the bones, it mostly just annoyed him when he was distracted. He
couldn't handle any more distractions this year.

To make matters worse, he had received an invitation to a dinner party with Professor Slughorn.
Horace Slughorn was a very impressive man. He loved recruiting talented students for a
prestigious club, which he called the Slug Club. Essentially, the duties were limited to small
gatherings and dinner parties. While it wasn't particularly time-consuming, it definitely was
something that Regulus had time for with all his other activities. While Regulus actually liked
Professor Slughorn he didn't love the idea of having to go to a dinner party when he could be
studying instead. Unfortunately, he knew that if his parents ever found out that he had been invited
to a prestigious organization in school and denied it that he would be punished accordingly. So
Regulus was forced to accept the invitation to the dinner party, even knowing he would hate going.

Tonight he had prefect rounds, which meant that he didn't have as much time to study. He hated
the idea of rounds tonight, as the last couple of nights he hadn't gotten much sleep because of his
studies. He was in desperate need of a nap, but no, instead he had to stay up late tonight and make
rounds around the school with James bloody Potter. He wasn't quite sure how he had ended up
doing rounds with Potter, it was completely insane. James was a sixth-year Gryffindor and
everyone knew that Slytherins and Gryffindors did not get along, specifically James and Regulus.
While they had never had any fights in front of the school. Everyone knew that Sirius and Regulus
did not get along, and considering that James and Sirius were best friends the odds were that they
didn't get along either. No, somehow that ignorant head girl had decided that this was going to be
the perfect night to make Regulus miserable. Regulus had to admit he was feeling a bit sleep-
deprived, so wasn't quite as sharp as he normally would be.

As soon as he finished class today, he had to go straight to quidditch practice. When his captain
had finally called practice to an end, he stopped by the Great Hall and grabbed a quick dinner.
Then he studied as long as he could until he had prefect rounds. He couldn't stop yawning and his
eyelids felt heavy. He was lucky that the prefect rounds were for the most part easy, but they were
boring at the same time. He had a feeling that working prefect rounds with James Potter would not
be as quiet as he preferred. James Potter was, as everyone knew, a talker, but hopefully, after the
whole situation that happened on the train, he knew not to talk to Regulus. Regulus was a bit
worried that James would confront him about the train situation. As Regulus really didn't want to
talk about it, and he wasn't particularly feeling very sharp with his wit today. That was probably a
result of barely speaking to anyone in the past week. He decided that as he was doing rounds
tonight he would be studying some of his spells in his head, instead of talking to Potter that way,
this night wouldn’t be a complete waste.

Regulus walked to the meeting spot that all prefects met at, right outside of Professor
McGonagall's office. He figured they probably met here because it was at the top of the school and
when you start at the top and work your way down more efficiently. Even though he knew the
reasoning he hated the fact he had to walk up six flights of stairs to even make it to the meeting
spot. If they met at Professor Slughorn's office, he could have gotten at least 15 more minutes of
studying in. As Regulus was walking down the hallway just outside of McGonagall’s office, he
saw Potter stepping out of what looked to be the Gryffindor common room. The picture frame
slamming behind him, he didn't look exactly happy about the arrangement either. In fact, he looked
about as happy to be doing prefect rounds as Regulus felt, but he looked a lot better rested. They
both stopped just outside of McGonagall's office and looked at each other, Regulus had a scowl on
his face while James looked pretty indifferent.

James was the first to break the silence,” Well, you ready?” Regulus nodded, not feeling like he
needed to talk to James for this to work. They began walking through the 5th floor not saying a
word to each other. It was nice, Regulus actually got to think about his transfiguration assignment.

Well, it was nice until five minutes in when James broke the silence, rather loudly if Regulus was
honest,” Look, are we not going to talk at all? I mean, we've got like two hours of these rounds and
we're not going to say a word to each other?”

Regulus towards him, rather annoyed to have his thought interrupted and spoke slowly as if
speaking to a toddler, “ Yes, Potter we're not going to speak at all, because neither of us like each
other. Neither of us wants to be here and I'm sure we both have things we'd rather be doing. So no,
I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to discuss anything. I just want to think to myself.”

James rolled his eyes, seeming annoyed towards Regulus as well,” Well, I don't want to do that, so
whether you're gonna listen or not, I'm going to talk. I'll tell you about my day.”

Regulus looked at him sharply, “ Do not tell me about your day.”

James smirked at him looking smug,” Well first today I got up and I went for a run-”

” I swear to Merlin, Potter. if you continue to tell me about your day, I'm going to kill you.”

James continued, completely ignoring Regulus' threat, “ Then I went to my first class of the day.”

Regulus groaned loudly,” It was transfigurations with Professor McGonagall. We transformed a

cauldron into a cardboard box, which was a bit backward if you ask me, but it was kind of fun.
Then I had potions with Professor Slughorn, which I kind of hate, but-”

“Potter, I will talk to you about anything, besides your day.”

James smiled brightly, overjoyed,” Really? I thought you didn't want to talk to me at all.”

Regulus rolled his eyes,” I don't want to talk to you, Potter. I just really don't want to hear about
your fucking day.”
James laughed loudly,” Fine Reggie, why don't we talk about your day and why you look like
you're about to fall over.”

” Do not call me Reggie and I don't look like I'm about to fall over.”

James looked immensely pleased with himself,” Yes you do. You look like if I started playing you
a lullaby, you'd fall asleep standing like a horse. You've got huge rings under your eyes. Your hair
is a mess.”

Regulus scowled at him,” Oh my hair is a mess? Have you ever seen your hair?”

Regulus couldn't believe the nerve of James Potter. Nobody in the Black family had messy or in
any way not perfect hair. The fact that James Potter, who has the messiest hair that Regulus has
ever seen, thought that his hair was messy was insulting?

James, however, was not insulted with Regulus' response, in fact, he laughed loudly as they
continued down the corridors,” Well, I know my hair is messy, it's genetics. What can I say? That's
why my father invented his hair potion because it's natural for my family's hair to be like this.
Potter's hair is just insane. I'm just saying I feel like your hair is always perfectly quaffed, but right
now it's only partially quaffed. Just seemed like you didn't take a whole lot of time checking it out
before you came.”

I'm not my brother. I don't spend 40 minutes in a mirror before I go anywhere. What you see is
usually natural anyways.”

James laughed at the mention of Sirius's bathroom habits,” Yeah, he does spend a lot of time in the
mirror. Vain, little thing, I just assumed you were like him.”

Regulus glared,” I'm nothing like Sirius.''

James, not wanting to get into another argument, went back to the subject at hand,” So why are you
so tired? It's only the first week of school.”

Regulus didn't want to answer and he absolutely did not want to tell Potter about why he was so
tired. Why he was so busy in the first week of school and why he couldn't stop thinking about
school for even an hour. Potter was not his diary, he didn't want to tell him about his feelings.

However, he didn't want to have to hear Potter nag him for the next 2 hours so he ended up just
telling him anyway, ” I'm just busy okay, I don't have a whole lot of time to sleep.” Potter looked at
him confused,” Why are you so busy? I know it's an OWLs year for you, but it's only the first
week. Most teachers haven't even assigned homework yet.”

Regulus felt uncomfortable, he didn't like the way Potter was looking at him, as if he was actually
interested in what Regulus was saying. He didn't like the way Potter was asking him questions. It
was weird having him almost concerned about Regulus’s appearance. Regulus shook off this
thought and told Potter that it was none of his business.

Potter rolled his eyes at that, “ I'm not asking you to tell me your life story, I'm just asking you to
tell me why you're so stressed out in the first week of school.”

He did have a point. It's not like this mattered that much. At least this was better than having to
hear about Potter's day. So Regulus told him, “I've just got a lot going on this year. I've got to do
really well in my OWLS and the homework is being assigned already and it is a lot more than I've
had before. I have quidditch practice and I've got this prefect stuff. Plus I just got a letter to join the
Slug Club.”

James looked vaguely surprised,” Wow I've never heard you talk so much.” Regulus rolled his
eyes as James continued,” Yeah, that does seem like a lot. Don't stress yourself out too much about
OWL’s though from what I hear, you're the best in your year. I can't imagine that you wouldn't do
well in your OWLs. And Slug Club isn't really that much of a responsibility.”

Regulus let out a bark of laughter surprising himself,” You're in Slug Club?”

James rolled his eyes,” I only come to about two meetings a year. They're not exactly required, and
my mom thinks that it would be good for me to have them on my resume for future jobs. Though I
told her I won't need it as a quidditch player.”

Regulus nodded,” You plan on being a quidditch player?”

” Yeah, don't you?”

Regulus shook his head,” No, I don't. Why would I?”

James looked slightly surprised about that as well,” You are telling me that you're not going to be
joining the Quidditch League. Don't you enjoy Quidditch?”

Regulus was uncomfortable about this line of questioning. He'd like to tell Potter that he hated
quidditch and that Quidditch was a waste of time. That he had bigger things that he wanted for his
future. Instead, he told Potter something closer to the truth,” Yeah I enjoy it. I just have other plans
for my future.”

James looked a bit affronted,” What other things could you possibly have planned for your future?
You're one of the best seekers that the school has ever had. You'd be able to get in the league in a
second.”

Regulus couldn't help but flush slightly at the compliment and he hated himself immediately for it.
Blacks did not blush, but he couldn't help it. Did James Potter just tell him that he was a great
seeker? He didn't know what to respond to, so instead, he responded to what Potter had said
before,” It's not that I don't have good grades. It's not that I wouldn't do well on the OWLs. It's
something that I need to do perfectly. I need to get all O’s.“

Regulus couldn't really believe that he had just told Potter that. He chalked it up to mental insanity
and the fact that he was sleep-deprived that he had such a loose tongue tonight. James looked
incredibly confused now and asked,” Why would you need to get all O’s?”

Regulus looked down slightly, not really wanting to respond. He was sure that Potter knew all
about his family and their standards. I mean, he had been best friends with Sirius since their first
year. He wasn't sure that he should tell James that his family was the one encouraging it. He didn't
want to get in an argument during rounds and he was sure that James wouldn't understand. From
what Regulus had heard Euphemia and Fleamont Potter were very understanding parents and just
wanted the best for their son. James Potter got decent grades, was extremely popular, and a great
Quidditch player, and that was perfectly fine with his parents. They didn't want him to be anything
else. That was not fine with Walpurga and Orion Black.

He must have taken too long to respond because James said something else, ”Are those your
standards or your parents?”

Regulus continued to look down and shrugged slightly, not knowing quite what to say. By this time
James and Regulus, we're already on the second floor. Regulus was quite surprised that they were
going so fast, he knew that they must at least be an hour in at this point then. He honestly didn't
know where the time had flown. There was something about James Potter that distracted him to the
point of losing track of time. He was surprised when he felt James stop him by a hand on his
shoulder and turn him towards James. James was looking at him with a look that Regulus really
didn't understand and it made him feel squeamish.

James spoke slowly,” Regulus, you don't need to get all O’s on your OWLS. You just need to do
your best and your best is plenty good. Demanding excellence of yourself especially when you're
only a week into school is insane. You are going to burn out. You already look like you can barely
stand. I can't imagine how you'll look later in the year. You need to relax.”

Regulus was already shaking his head before James had even finished, and he responded sounding
slightly more emotional than he planned on,” You don't understand. I have to get all O’s. I have to
be a prefect. I have to join the Slug Club. I have to be at the top of my class. I have to be perfect this
year. I don't care if I look tired all year, I will be perfect this year.”

James looked as if he'd been slapped across the face, then his look changed to pity. Regulus hated
being pitied. James spoke again, “Regulus, you don't need to be any of those things. You're 15, you
do not need to be perfect in any way. You don't need to be a prefect if you don't want to. You don't
have to join the Slug Club if you don't want to and you certainly don't have to get all O’s on your
OWLS. Hell, you don't even have to be at the top of your class if you don't want to. You have free
will. You can be whatever you want to be.”

Regulus was getting slightly angry now. Potter didn’t understand, he had no idea what Regulus
needed to do. He thought that it was so easy to say he had free will. Regulus had never had free
will. Hell Sirius had never had free will until he got out of that house. Regulus replied,” You don't
understand a damn thing about me. You don't understand what I need. You don't understand what I
have to do. You don't understand.”

James spoke, getting angry as well,” I do understand Regulus. I understand that you're so afraid of
your parents getting angry with you or upset. So you feel like you have to do everything that they
ask. They told you you need to be perfect this year, I'm sure. Well, I'm here to tell you you don't.
You don't have to do a damn thing they tell you to. Any parent demanding excellence of their 15-
year-old shouldn't have any children, to begin with.”

Regulus was livid,” You don't know a damn thing about my house. You don't know a damn thing
about my parents. I don't care what Sirius told you. I have to be perfect because of him. So never
insult my parents in front of me again. It's not their fault he ruined the family name.”

Potter was getting in his face now gritting his teeth,” Sirius didn't ruin the family name. The family
name was already ruined when they chose to abuse their children and marry their cousins.”
Regulus shoved Potter out of his face,” Don't talk about my family.”

The push seemed to knock some sense into Potter and he didn't push back. Instead, he looked
pitying again,” It's not Sirius's fault that he had to run away and it's not your fault either. It's not
something either of you needs to worry about. You don't need to fix your family name no matter
what your parents told you. It's not your responsibility.”

Regulus laughed maliciously,” Come on Potter, do you even know what an heir means? It's all on
me.”

James shook his head,” No, it's not and yes, I know what being an heir means. I am an heir. You're
the one who just became one, so don't try to teach me about being an heir.”

Regulus felt as if he'd been slapped. He knew that he was always the spare heir. He knew he was
never meant to be an heir. He knew he was always meant to be worthless, but to hear this blood
traitor bring up the fact that Regulus was just a replacement. That he didn't really know anything
that is meant to be an heir just added flame to the fire that was in Regulus's heart. Regulus didn't
know why he said it. He figured it was probably because he wasn't thinking because of the lack of
sleep or the anger that he felt towards James Potter, but he just wanted James to hurt.

In a taunting voice, Regulus said,” I'll finish rounds tonight. Why don't you just go back to your
room and get ready for the full moon? I bet Lupin’s already feeling it.”

James looked shocked and then incredibly angry, he shoved Regulus into the wall and Regulus
could hear the paintings complaining behind him. James spoke in a dark voice that Regulus didn't
know could even come out of James Potter,” What did you just say?”

Regulus wasn't feeling as confident as he was the moment before and responded by saying nothing.
Potter pushed him again harder against the wall asking again,” What did you say?”

Regulus finally spoke up,” I think you heard what I said.”

Potter put his hand around Regulus's throat not choking him but firmly against it as a threat, ”If you
ever whisper even a word about Lupin and his situation again I will make sure no one ever finds
you. Do you understand me?”
Regulus, now regretting his anger and the fact that he actually told Potter that he knew about
Lupin, responded softer,” Look Potter, I'm not going to say anything about Lupin. I've known for
years. Since my first year, in fact, I haven't said anything. Now I just mentioned it because I was
angry. I'm not going to say anything.”

Potter looked shocked,” How could you have possibly known since the first year? We didn't even
find out until the third?”

Regulus rolled his eyes at that, of course, he knew his brother was oblivious and he could just tell
Pettigrew was. It was pretty unsurprising that Potter was as well. He said,” I mean, it's obvious. He
disappears around the full moon, and even before that he looks rough as if even standing is a
challenge. Not to mention you all disappear the morning after the full moon as if you are in the
hospital visiting him or something.”

James looked confused,” Fine, but I'm warning you Black if I hear you say anything about Lupin
you'll wish you were never born.”

At that James stormed off and Regulus was left leaning against the wall whispering to himself,” I
already wish I wasn't.”
 Secrets and Brothers

James

James couldn't believe it. How had Regulus found out? Rationally, he knew that it made perfect
sense that Regulus could have discovered the marauder's most secure secret. Sirius always said he
was extremely perceptive and he seemed to have noticed when Remus had missed days of school.
He had also noticed when the rest of the Marauders were gone as well. James still couldn't believe
it. How had somebody found out Remus’s secret and how could it have been Sirius's younger
brother? The younger brother that Sirius was certain was a death eater in training. The pompous
Slytherin brat was the one who found out about Remus. If Regulus was telling the truth then he
had known since his first year. Not only had he found out about Remus' secret, but he also had
been keeping it for four years. If that was true then that meant that more than likely Regulus
wouldn't be telling anyone.

He seemed to regret even mentioning it to James. James wasn't sure if that's because of his own
reaction to it or genuine regret. There were no rumors around the school about Remus being a
werewolf, so more than likely Regulus was very good at keeping secrets. It also meant that Regulus
had decided this was a secret worth keeping. James didn't know why Regulus had decided to keep
this secret. He didn't know if he even wanted to know. He really hoped that Regulus wasn't
planning to use Remus’ condition against him eventually, and was now only feeling regret for
spoiling his plans by telling James he knew. James wasn't sure of anything when it came to
Regulus Black. The more he talked to him the more he realized that he was an enigma. James
wasn't sure what to do or how to handle the situation. He had threatened the little Black and he
hoped that that would be enough to keep Regulus from telling anyone. Then again James had
feeling Regulus had heard a lot of threats in his life, either from his parents or the other Slytherins,
so maybe he was immune to threats.

The one thing James did know was that he had to tell the others. Even if Regulus was able to keep
the secret, there's no way James would feel comfortable without everyone knowing that Regulus
knew Remus’s secret. So, that night when he got back from prefect rounds. He gathered the rest of
the boys in the common room. He had to physically part Sirius from Marlene's face to get him up
there. When he did get up there he started to tell them. He was beyond nervous about how Remus
would respond.

Sirius was the first to react to James' news, he was instantly livid as soon as James even mentioned
Regulus’s name and Remus’ name in the same sentence. As James continued telling them how
everything unfolded, Sirius’ anger increased steadily. He was pissed at Regulus for even
mentioning Remus’ name, let alone his condition. He didn’t seem to see reason when it came to his
brother. While James was sure Sirius would be pissed no matter who found about Remus, he was
specifically irrational when it came to his little brother.
James wondered why that was. Was it because Sirius wanted to hate anyone that could ruin
Remus’ life, but couldn’t bring himself to hate Regulus. Was it because Regulus was a Slytherin
and Sirius was convinced all Slytherins were evil. James had to admit he pretty much agreed with
Sirius on that point, though he was starting to wonder if Regulus actually fit that bill. James had
never actually seen Sirius so angry in his life and he had known Sirius for five years. James was
actually getting a bit concerned for Regulus at this point. James knew that Sirius would confront
his brother, he had absolutely no doubt about it. He was worried that Sirius would do something he
regretted.

Peter seemed confused when James first began telling the other Marauders about his night. James
could see the exact moment Peter understood what having Regulus know about Moony’s secret
meant for Remus. He instantly looked concerned and slightly frightened for Remus. He couldn’t
stop looking at Remus, while he was biting his fingernails. Peter always chewed on his fingernails
when he was nervous about something. When James had first met Peter, the boy would practically
always have his fingers pressed to his mouth. As time went on and Peter gained confidence James
saw this sight less and less. It had seemed as if the habit had been broken, until tonight. Apparently,
it just took something extremely serious to bring out the habit now. This shook James a bit as it
showed that Peter was taking this very seriously, Peter hardly ever took anything seriously.

Remus on the other hand was blank-faced throughout the entire story. He didn’t react to James’
retelling of the threat he made to Regulus. He didn’t even react to James telling them that Regulus
said he had known about Remus since his first year. James just sat thereafter he had finished
speaking just waiting for Sirius to react. He didn’t say a word until Sirius had asked James where
his cloak was so that he could go down to the Slytherin common room to kick Regulus’s ass.

That made Remus stand up and tell him to calm down. Remus seemed calm given the situation,
James knew he wouldn’t be if the situations were reversed. Remus had always been the one with
the cool head in the group though. He never got too worked up about anything, well at least
externally. James had no idea what was going on internally for Remus. Remus told them how even
though he was disappointed that someone else had found out, he had expected someone to put the
pieces together eventually. He actually seemed sort of glad that it was Regulus who had found out
and not one of the other Slytherins. Remus also seemed glad that Regulus seemed to have put the
pieces together himself rather than finding out from Snape because at least that meant Snape was
keeping his mouth shut.

Snape was the only other student that the Marauders knew of that knew Remus was a werewolf. He
had found out when Sirius had told him how to get past the Whomping Willow on the night of the
full moon and James had to save him from Moony. Snape had been warned by the staff that there
would be severe consequences if that information slipped to anyone. That situation was not one
James liked to remember. It had taken place right before Christmas in their fifth year and it had
taken Remus till Summer to fully forgive Sirius. It had taken James and Peter a while too, as it was
a betrayal of monster proportions. If Remus could forgive him, so could the other Marauders.

Remus seemed to have decided to have a discussion with Regulus in the morning and implore him
to keep his secret. James thought this was a good idea, as Remus was pretty convincing and it
would probably do more than if Sirius’ threatened him. Sirius wanted to join in that discussion
with Regulus, but Remus Vetod that saying that it was his problem and he would deal with it as he
pleased. James didn’t necessarily agree with that as they were Marauders and they always stuck
together. They all went to bed for the night or tried to with all the thoughts of how to keep Regulus
Black quiet running through their heads.

******************************************************************************************

When James woke up the next morning the first thing he did was look over to the bed next to him.
Sirius was gone. James panicked immediately. Shit, what if he did something stupid.

He quickly woke up Peter and Remus, scream whispering out, “Where is Sirius?”

Their faces instantly filled with dread and that’s all it took for James to throw on a shirt and run out
into the common room. Again he couldn’t find Sirius, so he took off to the dungeons, praying that
his feeling was wrong and that Sirius hadn’t gone to confront his brother.

He managed to find the two Black brothers in the dungeon, near a stairwell that wasn’t used very
often. James wondered briefly how Sirius had known to find his brother taking this route. He
wondered if Sirius kept an eye on his brother, secretly. He didn’t have too much time to ponder that
thought though, because he was too busy watching the scene that unfolded in front of him. Regulus
was shoved into the corridor wall by his brother. Sirius’ hand found Regulus’s neck. He didn’t
appear to be choking him, just holding him there like a threat.

Sirius gritted his teeth saying, ”How dare you, you little prat. How dare you even speak those
words about Remus to James. How dare you even look at Remus during the day? He's way too
good for you to even have your eyes on him. You slimy little Slytherin, if you even consider telling
one of your creepy friends about Remus. I'll send an anonymous letter to the honorable Walpurga
Black and tell them that you're a poofter and that you are fucking a muggle-born.”

Regulus, who seemed to be barely able to breathe from fear, had no response. Meanwhile, James
was standing behind him and was shocked. He wasn't shocked about Sirius, threatening Regulus,
he figured that would have happened no matter what. He was shocked that Sirius threatened him
with telling his parents lies. It was insane that Sirius was mad enough to sick his cruel parents on
his younger brother. James felt a little sick from hearing Sirius’ threat and he knew he had to stop
this.

James’ voice sounded a lot weaker than he was going for he had mean to be stern but he sounded
desperate instead,” Stop Sirius. This isn't going to help anything.”

Sirius turned slightly looking at James, obviously not having noticed him till now. Then he turned
back to Regulus but spoke to James,” Yes, it is. He needs to know where he stands and he needs to
understand exactly what will happen to him if he ever crosses Moony.”

James was about to speak when Regulus croaked out laughing the best he could with the pressure
on his throat,” Moony. You call him Moony and you expect no one to-.”

His speech was cut off when Sirius pressed his arm tighter against his throat, cutting off his air
supply. James sprang forward, knowing that this had gone way too far. He needed to knock some
sense into Sirius and make sure Regulus didn’t get hurt in the process. Sirius would never forgive
himself if he hurt his brother while he was in a raged blur. He couldn't believe that Sirius was
doing this no matter how mad he was. He grabbed Sirius by his arm trying to pull it away from
Regulus. He fought and jostled with Sirius till he could finally manage to displace his arm. He
could hear it the moment Regulus could breathe again, from the sharp intake of breath and the
relieved sigh Regulus let out. Regulus slipped to the floor leaving against the wall trying to get his
breath back. Meanwhile, Sirius was looking down at him with so much hate James could almost
taste it.

Sirius finally turned to James yelling venomously, “Why did you do that? Don't you care what he
could do to Moony? He could ruin his life on a whim!”

James couldn't even believe he had to explain himself to Sirius,” Yes, obviously I care what he
could do to Moony. That he has information that he could hold over his head, but do you really
think killing your little brother in the middle of a corridor is going to help Moony in the slightest?”

Sirius looked like he'd been slapped, then looked down at Regulus. He looked as if he had finally
shaken off the glaze he’d been in since James had told him the news. He looked at his brother
gasping, struggling to catch his breath, with an abnormally red face. He seemed to notice the
panicked look in Regulus's eyes as he stared up at his brother. James understood what happened
now, Sirius had let the Black temper get the best of him and he had done something that he really
regretted. He never meant to do that to anybody, and he certainly didn't mean to do it to Regulus.

Although Sirius would deny it to his grave and I'm sure Regulus wouldn't believe it either, James
knew Sirius cared about Regulus. If things were different and if Regulus wasn't a Slytherin, or
maybe if he even would come to Sirius for help, He would open up his arms to his little brother
gladly. He would take Regulus under his wing and make sure he got away from that house.
Regulus would never do that, he had too much pride. Sirius was doomed to always miss his
brother.
Sirius finally spoke, “Uhm? Look Reg, I'm sorry I didn't mean to get…. I just overreacted a bit. I'm
Serious about this you can't tell anybody. Nobody can know about Remus ever. Do you
understand?”

Regulus looked up into his brother’s eyes, nodding slightly, not saying anything. James couldn't
believe what he saw. Regulus Black had tears in his eyes that hadn't been there a second ago. James
had a sneaky suspicion that the nickname that he hadn't heard in years made the tear fall. James
isn't sure if Sirius even noticed the tears. Regulus finally spoke,” Look I promise I won’t tell
anyone. Can I go now?”

James was a little shocked. From what he had noticed Regulus black did what he wanted when he
wanted. He certainly wouldn’t ask someone for permission to leave a room. Then again maybe that
wasn’t how it worked in the Black household, maybe he was taught to always ask either his parents
or his big brother for permission to do things. Maybe this was all muscle memory for him. That
thought depressed James more than he’d like to admit. Once again he felt pity for the younger
Black brother. He knew Regulus wasn't exactly a good guy, but he had had a hard life and James
couldn’t hold that against him.

Sirius spoke once again, almost sounding meek, ”Okay Reg, if you promise then you can go.”
Regulus got up so quick and bolted.

Sirius turned to James after Regulus had vanished. He looked him in the eyes and even though a
minute ago he hadn't had tears in his eyes, he did now. James hated seeing his best friend like this,
so sad and vulnerable. He liked seeing Sirius happy and laughing. He preferred seeing his friend
full of life.

James decided to finally break the silence between them,” Are you okay Sirius?”

Sirius nodded slightly, not showing any other indication that he had heard James. There were a few
more minutes of silence between the two before Sirius finally looked up from the floor and into
James’s eyes, ”Did you notice the tears? James, he thought I was going to kill him. He was scared
of me. My little brother was scared of me and for a minute I was scared of what I would do to him.
I have never felt the compulsion that way. It was like I was being controlled by my anger. By my
mother’s anger. I don't want to be like her, James.”

James couldn’t believe what he was hearing, he had always known that Sirius would let his temper
get the best of him occasionally. That he always seemed rather subdued and depressed after one of
his incidents, but he never knew that Sirius felt like Walpurga Black when he'd have his temper
outbursts. Sirius’ biggest fear was becoming like his mother. He suddenly understood a lot about
Sirius; like why Sirius always walked away from arguments, why he would crack jokes at
inappropriate times, and how Sirius had betrayed Remus last year. He had let his anger get the best
of him to the point where it consumed him and he could no longer think about others. Everything
Sirius did was an attempt to avoid getting angry and becoming the son Walpurga Black always
wanted.

James stepped forward and pulled Sirius in a hug “You are not like her. You are nothing like her,”
James whispered while his best friends began sobbing in his arms.

Later once the tears had been dried and an apology had been made to James, Sirius decided to
make his apologies to Remus.

The Marauders gathered in their dorm room, no none speaking until Sirius broke the silence. Sirius
apologized to Peter for scaring him and making him worry more than was necessary. He
apologized to Remus for going against his wishes and doing something stupid. He apologized to
James, once again, for making him deal with Sirius’ outburst. He apologized to the whole group
for letting his anger get the best of him and he promised to be better.

Sirius didn’t tell the others what exactly had taken place in the dungeons that morning, and James
didn’t think it was his place to tell. So the subject was dropped for the rest of the day. James
couldn’t drop it from his memory though. The look in Sirius’ eye as he choked his little brother.
The gasping as Regulus tried to breathe was seared into James’s memory.

Later that night James was having trouble falling asleep, as he kept imagining what could’ve
happened if he hadn’t been there this morning. Maybe Sirius would’ve gotten a hold of himself and
let Regulus go. James had to admit he didn’t put much faith in that theory. James was just glad that
he was there.

James was shook out of his thoughts when he heard someone get out of bed. He leaned up to look
who it was and saw Sirius sneaking into the curtain surrounding Remus’ bed. He heard muffled
whispering before a silencing spell was placed around them. James figured it was for the best that
they discussed what had happened today by themselves, so he turned on his side and fall asleep.

The last thing he remembers thinking of before he fell into a deep comatose, was of a pair of grey
eyes.
 A Wolf's Perspective

Remus

Remus Lupin had struggled a lot in his short life. He struggled with trying not to sound too uncouth
while hanging around a bunch of purebloods. He struggled to keep up on studies with the
aforementioned purebloods, who had grown up surrounded by magic. Technically Remus was a
half-blood, his father had magic while his mother was a muggle, so theoretically he should have
had an advantage as well. The thing was though, he didn’t. While he was growing up his father
never used magic in the house, as it scared his mother.

Remus had known very little about the Wizarding world before he came to Hogwarts. His parents
both worked muggle jobs and they lived in a muggle neighborhood. Remus had only seen his
father’s wand one time when the house had caught on fire and Lyle Lupin wanted to make sure
everything was repaired. Other than that though Remus hadn’t known a thing about magic when he
came to school, so he had as much knowledge of charms and spells as a muggle-born.

Remus’s family wasn’t exactly poor but they were lower class for sure. His parents worked almost
constantly it seemed, yet they never had the money for anything. His parents were always arguing
over bills and other adult issues. Remus’s family lived in a lower-class muggle neighborhood and
Remus’s speech patterns when he came to Hogwarts reflected that. He often used slang that he had
heard from neighboring kids and his accent was extremely
affected.

So when he made friends with three wealthy purebloods on the train, he couldn’t believe it. Peter
definitely wasn’t the stereotypical wealthy pureblood. His family was more upper-middle-class
and he did have some contact with muggle society. So he wasn’t completely hopeless when it came
to muggle ideals. Peter’s father had died when he was very young, so he grew up with only his
mother and his older sister. Peter’s older sister had now moved to America and was living with a
muggle boy, such a scandal. Remus didn’t really understand why that was a big deal, but
apparently, it was considering all the whispering and pointing Peter had to deal with after the
incident spread through Hogwarts.

James Potter on the other hand was a stereotypical wealthy pureblood. When he talked it always
felt as if he was a king addressing his subjects. Remus knew he didn't try to speak that way, it just
was how it felt to Remus when James would use words he didn’t understand. James could be a total
shit bag of course, but he was probably the kindest person Remus had ever met. James truly cared
about his friends more than anything else. Once you earned his loyalty you had it for life. Remus
always thought that his blind trust for loved ones would end badly for him. The only person James
was even remotely mean to was Severus Snape. Severus Snape had hated James from the moment
he saw him and he would often insult and harass him when they were younger. Now what they had
was more of a rivalry than anything. Both James and Severus were very intelligent and creative
and their rivalry had gotten more and more dangerous over the years. Remus really hoped it would
come to an end before it got one of them hurt beyond repair.
Sirius Black, the last member of the marauders, was a different story altogether. He was incredibly
intelligent but often wasted his talent as an opportunity to piss off his parents. Sirius Black was
wealthier than almost every student in Hogwarts. While both James and Peter were also the heirs to
their family lines and would be receiving large sums, specifically James, after they came of age,
they had nothing on Sirius Black. Sirius came from an incredibly old family that had an insane
amount of old money. He was the heir of the house and came to school with an entirely odd
outlook on blood. While he didn't look down on people of another blood status he did have a
strange idea that people with fully wizard blood had a more natural talent and would achieve
greater things. He actually seemed to pity muggle-borns for their lack of natural gifts. He quickly
changed his mind once he saw the muggle-borns in school matching pureblood talent or even
excelling. Remus had been originally offended by the way Sirius took it as a fact that Purebloods
were more gifted until he realized why Sirius thought that. The boy had been practically
brainwashed by his family. His family were huge blood supremacists and had drilled it into his
head that purebloods were somehow above other wizards.

Sirius soon became the poster boy for blood equality and while Remus appreciated the effort Sirius
went through, sometimes he thought he went a little far on his hatred for all things Slytherin. While
Remus agreed most of the Slytherin house were slimy little gits who could be extremely racist, not
all of them were. James and Sirius both often treated the entire house as if they were all death
eaters in training. Take Sirius’s younger brother, for example, Remus knew that Regulus Black
liked to follow the rules and do what his parents told him to, but Remus has never seen Regulus
pick on anyone. Regulus didn't seem to bully anyone on their blood status or anything else. Remus
hadn't even heard him ever say the word mudblood, which was practically some of the Slytherins
favorite words these days. Yet Sirius treated Regulus as if he was already a death eater, he would
constantly refer to him as such.

While Remus knew a lot of that was posturing and trying to make up for the fact that his family
was some of the biggest blood supremacists around, Remus still thought it was unfair. It was unfair
the way Sirius is treated by his brother sometimes. Remus knew that Sirius loved his brother and
that he wished above anything that they were on the same side. He also thought that Sirius gave up
too quickly on his brother. He had given up hope almost the moment Regulus got sorted into
Slytherin. His opinion of his little brother changed completely at that moment, all of a sudden there
was potential for darkness in his brother that he had never noticed before. When Regulus had sat
with the marauders on the train, Remus had thought the boy was very sweet-natured.

He was naturally very quiet and shy, the complete opposite of his brother, but he was very polite to
Remus. That first interaction had told Remus everything he needed to know about Regulus Black.
He knew Remus was a poor half-blood and he had treated him as well as he treated James or Peter.
Regulus Black may have a reputation for believing his parents' bullshit, but he certainly didn't.
Comparing Regulus to the likes of Mulciber or Avery was almost laughable. They were as different
as could be and sometimes when Remus heard Sirius compare them he couldn't help but get angry.
Angry for Regulus who had done nothing wrong but was treated like a criminal by his brother.

Everything changed when Regulus got sorted into Slytherin, not only for the brothers but for the
rest of the marauders as well. Remus wasn't actually sure the others had noticed because they
never discussed the changes in Sirius. Sirius seemed to develop a vendetta against the whole of
Slytherin house, directing most pranks towards them. This lead to most of the Slytherin house
hating the marauders as a whole. Sirius also had decided fully that his family was evil and that he
wanted out of that house. Before he had often made excuses for their brutality or stated that they
were his family. After Regulus’s next seven years had been decided for him, Sirius had decided
that everything and everyone in that house was a lost cause. Remus secretly thought the change
was because he resented his parents for turning his brother against him. Remus thought that if
Sirius made an effort Regulus would be back on his side in an instant.

Another one of Remus’s biggest struggles was that he was gay. While he knew that there wasn't
anything wrong with that. He also knew that people didn't understand homosexuality. They
thought it was a choice of some sort which Remus thought was ridiculous. If he had the choice, he
won't choose to be gay. He wouldn’t choose to make his life more difficult than it already was, and
it was already very difficult. He discovered this fact about himself when he was in his fourth year
he formed a crush on Gideon Prewett. He thought Gideon Pruitt was the most ruggedly handsome
boy had ever seen and he would constantly stare at him. It wasn't until Gideon graduated that
Remus really realized that he was obsessed with him. Then Remus had his first kiss. It was with a
boy named Alex Valor. It had been very nice, but he didn't really see a future with him and Alex. It
had been nice to have somebody want him, that he wanted back. He and Alex dated for a couple of
months before they both moved on.

That was around the time where he finally told the other marauders about his inclination towards
the same sex. Peter patted him on the back and had joked that this just meant there were more
women for himself. Which Remus thought lightened the mood immensely. James practically
became his wingman at that moment. He immediately started pointing out all the attractive guys
that Remus could go for. Which Remus had to admit was kind of nice, James and he had similar
taste in men, apparently. Even though as far as Remus knew James was straight as could be and
was obsessed with Lily Evans. Sirius didn't say much, but he wasn't rude and he didn't look
disgusted or anything. Later that night when he had crawled into Remus’s bed before muttering a
silencing spell around them and they talked. They talked about how it happened and how he had
figured it out. Remus couldn’t believe how much he was telling Sirius when his friend hadn't
given him any indication of how he felt about it. By the end of the conversation, Sirius gave him a
hug and told him that he loved him. This was the first time Sirius crawled into Remus’s bed for a
late-night chat, but it became a weekly thing after the first time.

Remus’s greatest struggle dictated every action he took. It would affect his future more than he
wished it would. He knew it would prevent him from getting jobs and prevent him from living a
normal life. It was the reason he sometimes hated himself and it was something that he would
never escape from. He was a werewolf. He had been one since he was four years old when he was
bitten by a werewolf by the name of Fenrir Greyback in his backyard on the full moon night. His
parents tried their best to get him all the help they could, they loved him deeply. That's why they
hid him from the rest of the world for the most part. All he needed now from them was love, which
they happily gave. Especially his mother. Remus had scars all over him from his multiple
transformations. As he was getting older, the transformations were getting worse. It was his third
year when things really got bad. He was tearing himself apart from every full moon and was
spending days after the full moon in the hospital. When his friends finally came to him and
confessed that they knew his secret, he was scared.

He didn't know why, because his friends had been nothing but supportive to him. They would
bring him chocolate, treats, and his homework after the full moon. They keep him company and
he'd never felt support like he did after they found out. After Christmas, they came to him with an
idea, an idea to transform themselves into Animagus to help him on the full moon. He was
completely against it and told them absolutely not. About two months before school ended for that
year, they came to him telling them that they had already done it and they showed him their
Animagus forms. It was hard for Remus to be mad at them when he saw them in their animal
forms.

He couldn't help but laugh that James Potter was a stag of all things, oddly enough it really fit him.
Peter was a rat, which he was kind of upset about, although he cheered up when Sirius told him it
would be very useful for pranks. Sirius was a dog and he loved running around in his dog form.
Remus would soon find out they had decided that they would be with him on the next full moon.
They were nervous about it, but they had nothing to be nervous about, apparently. His werewolf
loved the animal friends he had now. He woke up the next morning with barely any scratches at
all. He finally did not have to stay in the hospital wing forever. He actually got to have a semi-
normal life.

Now, though, two Slytherins knew his secret and that meant that his secret was in danger. One of
the Slytherins was Severus Snape, he was still scared about that whole experience and tried his
best to keep it out of his memory. The other one was Regulus black and he didn't know how he felt
about Regulus being the person that found out about the secret. He never had a problem with
Regulus personally but he knew his brother was not happy about the situation. James didn't seem
exactly happy about it either, but Remus thought it could be much worse than it was. He knew that
Regulus Black was a highly logical individual and if Remus could give him a good enough reason
not to tell anybody he thinks that Regulus would keep his secret.

When James told him about Regulus knowing, he immediately thought that he could talk to him.
That he could get this all figured out. It was hard to think about his own thoughts when all he could
hear was his friends yelling, gnawing on their fingernails, and staring at him. He had resolved to
talk to Regulus the next day. Then the next day came and Sirius had once again done something
stupid. Remus hadn't known what had happened that day as James and Sirius didn't say anything
except for the apologies Sirius had made to him. Later that night, Sirius snuck into his bed like he
did only when he was really upset and needed to talk, and talk they did. Sirius told him about the
whole interaction. The things he had said, the things he had done, and the fears he had while he
was doing them. Once again, Remus felt sorry for his handsome friend. Sirius was haunted,
haunted by monsters of his own. Just like Remus.

****************************************************************************
Remus was nervous. He hadn't actually said a word to Regulus Black since Regulus’s first year.
That was when he actually was around Sirius every once in a while. At that time he and Regulus
had been on good terms but considering it had been four years he didn't know where they stood
any longer. Regulus was considered a blood supremacist and his brother didn't have high hopes of
him not following in his family's footsteps. However, Remus had never actually seen Regulus do
anything to cause suspicion of that. Regulus Black was a very quiet boy and he was very studious.
He was an excellent quidditch player as far as Remus could see, not that he was that interested, but
he wasn't blind either.

Regulus black only appeared to have two friends, and while Remus certainly didn't like either of
those friends, they weren't the worst Slytherins he could hang around. They certainly weren't the
best, but they weren't the worst either. Remus tried not to judge Regulus based on what his brother
said because he knew that Regulus also received the punishments that Sirius had told him about.
Sirius always told him that Regulus was as loyal as can be and once he earned his loyalty, it stayed
with him. He had also said Regulus was a coward and he didn't know how to be strong or brave.
His mother had never taught him that, instead she locked him in his room and tried to forget that he
existed. Remus always found this particularly sad when Sirius would say it in one of their private
chats. Sirius said it in an offhand way as if it was just fact, rather than child abuse.

Remus had always felt bad for Sirius Black and his family issues, but he also felt bad for Regulus
Black. Regulus more than likely had the same issues that Sirius did with his family but instead of
being able to blow off steam when he got to school and hang out with friends who didn't drag you
back into your family shit, he got friends that wanted to be death eaters. That thought the fact that
Regulus’s family were followers of the Dark Lord was incredible. Rumus only knew this because
of rumors and he tried not to put too much stock into rumors, but he also knew that rumors always
had some truth to them.

Remus was looking on the Marauder's map at Regulus’s location, he seemed to be in the owlery.
There didn't seem to be anybody else near him and Remus hoped it would stay that way long
enough for him to go find him. Remus knew that Sirius didn't want him to talk to his brother,
especially after what had happened between the two. However, Remus needed to know what the
little Black was thinking. He needed to know whether he had told Sirius and James the truth about
not exposing Remus. Remus had been quite surprised when Sirius had told him about the morning
to go talk to Regulus. He had never expected Sirius to react that way and he certainly had never
expected it to result in tears.

After they had discussed it, nobody talked about it. Sirius and Remus didn't talk about it, James
and Remus didn't talk about it, and as far as he could see, Sirius and James didn't talk about it.
Remus didn't know if this was particularly healthy as clearly something had happened to Sirius that
morning. Clearly, something had taken over him and his normally calm demeanor. Remus really
hoped that Regulus didn't mention what had happened. Remus didn't have it in him to defend his
friend on that matter, especially to the only person in the world who knew more about Sirius than
James, Peter, and himself did.
Remus tried to think of what he would say to Regulus on his long walk to the owlery. He tried to
think of how he would reason with him, how he would convince the wealthy pureblood heir to
keep his deepest, darkest secret. Remus was blanking on what he could say. The only possible
connection between them was Sirius and Remus really didn't know where the two brothers stood.
He knew they weren't exactly close but he always thought there was still a sort of kinship between
the two. However, after what had happened, he wasn't quite so sure. He made sure to check the
map just before he made it owlery, making sure that Regulus was still alone. Regulus appeared to
be standing in the same place he had for the entire trek up here, which Remus found odd. When he
reached the top of the stairs he was surprised to see Regulus slumped up against the wall with a
book in his lap fast asleep.

Remus was shocked that Regulus had decided that the owlery was a nice place to nap. Then again
considering the book on his lap, maybe the nap wasn't originally the plan. Still, though, studying in
the owlery? The owlery was always loud and absolutely disgusting. There was bird poop
everywhere and Remus couldn't believe Regulus was sitting on the floor with all the dirt that was
on it. Regulus was wearing what looked to be new school robes and Remus couldn't imagine
himself treating something that cost so much that way. His own robes were second-hand, in fact,
he had never had new school robes. Ugh, Purebloods.

He couldn't help but roll his eyes at the thoughtless behavior before waking the boy up, “Not the
best place for a nap.”

At the sound of his voice, Regulus jumped slightly and looked surprised to see Remus standing
there. Remus made sure the map was closed and shoved it into his pocket before Regulus could
notice it. Regulus seemed to be taking a moment to get a hold of himself, he seemed rather out of it.
He watched as Regulus looked around his surroundings and his lip curled in revulsion to where he
was. This confused Remus as well as it amused him, how had Regulus not realized how gross this
place was before he decided to study here? Regulus got to his feet dusting off his robes.

Once he deemed himself presentable he looked back at Remus. “Hello, Lupin. I was just…
studying.”

He was clearly trying to fight off the embarrassment he felt and Remus took pity on the kid, “Yes, I
have heard that the owlery is a great place for that.”

Regulus seemed ready to jump right off the owlery at that moment, “Uh right. Well, I should go.”
As he said these words he was grabbing his books and getting ready to leave.

Remus panicked that he wouldn't get to have the conversation he had been rehearsing in his head
for the past few days, “Wait!”
Regulus stopped looking shocked at Remus’s outburst. Now it was Remus’s turn to feel
embarrassed, “I just… I need to talk to you.”

Regulus raised one eyebrow in question, “And what pray tell would you have to talk to me about?”

Remus snorted slightly as to how pompous that sounded, “Well I hear that you know a little more
about me than I thought you did.”

Remus figured that being vague would be for the best as he didn't know how Regulus would react.
Regulus’s face remained impassive and in a cool voice he responded, “If I did know something
about you, what would you have to say to me?”

Remus appreciated Regulus not saying the words out loud as it made everything more covert, “If
you did know something about me then I would hope you would keep it to yourself.”

Regulus’s lip quirked up slightly and then his face was back to impassive, ”Did you hear from any
of your sources that I already answered that question, twice.”

Remus’s eyebrows furrowed, “I had heard that, but as you might expect certain information is too
valuable to trust it with sources.”

Regulus tilted his head in interest, “ Not even your most trusted sources?”

Remus admired Regulus’s commitment to this little game they were playing, ”Especially my most
trusted sources. They are the most likely to withhold information in an attempt to safeguard my
feelings.”

Regulus nodded in understanding, “Sometimes that's nice to have. Someone or someones that cares
enough about you to try to keep you safe.”

Remus had a feeling that Regulus was thinking of his own situation at that moment, “It is nice, but
I always thought honesty was the best policy no matter how brutal it is.”
Regulus rolled his eyes, “Considering you were told about my knowledge of your secret within
hours of Potter’s discovery, I'd say you have plenty of honesty in your life.”

Remus was shocked by Regulus’ sudden ending of their tiptoeing around the subject, “Oh is our
game at an end? You should have warned me I had at least three more vague idioms ready to go.”

Regulus smirked, “Is that all? I had at least five and a pointless expression in my arsenal.”

Remus chuckled, he couldn't believe this conversation he was having with someone who he hadn't
talked to in years. Remus never could have had this oddly persiflage conversation with any of the
marauders, possibly Lily though. Regulus had a very sharp wit and Remus had to admit that what
he liked in his friends. Sadly he knew he could never be friends with Regulus Black though, Sirius
would never allow it.

Regulus broke through Remus’s thoughts, “Listen let's cut to the chase. I am not going to tell
anyone your secret. As I told James and Sirius, I have known about it for a long time and I have
never found a reason to tell anyone it okay?”

Remus was shocked by the directness Regulus was showing, it wasn't something Remus typically
expected from Slytherins, then again it seemed that Regulus was always the exception of that
house. Remus also appreciated the directness, as he had told Regulud before, he preferred brutal
honesty to sugar-coated lies. Remus wanted to make sure that Regulus never found a reason to
share his secret. Regulus might have no plans of telling anyone but that didn't mean he would never
have a reason to. Remus knew that there was only one way to make sure Regulus never told.

Remus breathed deeply before he spoke next trying to sound confident, “Thank you Regulus I
appreciate that. Now let me give you a reason to keep that promise-”

Regulus interrupted, not sounding particularly rude but as if he wanted Remus to believe him,” I
don't need a reason. You have my word.”

Remus smiled slightly at that, “ I am grateful for that but it would make me feel better if you were
aware of something just in case the temptation to spill my secret got too strong.”

Regulus rolled his eyes as if Remus was being ridiculous, “ Okay shoot. What is it that you want
me to know?”
Remus softened his voice, figuring the less like a threat this sounded the better, “Regulus if you
were to ever tell anyone my secret, I am sure you think it would have no effect on you. It's not as if
I would come to get my revenge. However, I think you might be forgetting the most important
piece in this argument. Sirius.”

Remus watched Regulus's eyes widened then darkened and he continued, “Sirius would never
forgive you if you told anyone about me. I know you two aren't on particularly good terms at the
moment but I think you still like to keep the potential for reconciliation.”

Regulus was silent for a second before speaking in almost a whisper, “There is no chance for
reconciliation. Sirius chose his side and I chose mine. That's all there is to it.”

Remus quirked an eyebrow up at Regulus,” Is that so? From what I have seen both of you would
forgive one another in a heartbeat if either made the slightest indication that they wanted that.”

Regulus looks up at him, “A stalemate.“

Remus quipped back, “Neither will budge. Neither will heal.”

Regulus appeared to be thinking of that last sentence when Remus decided his work there was
done, “Just think about what I said and remember your promise. Later Reg.”

Remus walked past Regulus, catching the surprise on his face at the use of his childhood
nickname. Remus didn't regret using it, he figured that it would remind Regulus of Sirius which
would only help his case.

Remus hoped beyond hope that someday he would see the Black brothers reconcile.
 First Quidditch Game

Regulus

Regulus had never felt as depressed as he had the day Sirius had attacked him. That was the only
word he could think of to describe what had happened, attacked. He had never felt as afraid of his
brother as he did at that moment. He had never seen Sirius look at him that way. Like he didn't care
whether he lived or died. The only person Regulus had seen Sirius act that way towards was their
mother when they were in one of their screaming matches.

Regulus had always been scared of their mother, while he loved her, he feared her more. She was
vicious and all things sharp. Her words could cut you like glass and her stare could freeze you like
Medusa, a witch of sorts Regulus had read about in a muggle mythology book. She was cruel to
almost everyone. She was cruel to her children, her house-elves, and even her husband sometimes.
Though Orion usually would only take so much attitude before snapping at her. He was the only
one who could snap at her and come out unscathed. Sirius often tried but he'd receive brutal
punishments for his insolence.

When Sirius and Walpurga would fight with each other it was always a merciless affair, neither one
caring whether they hurt the other. Sirius’ goal was to cause their mother pain and mother’s goal
was to beat Sirius into submission. Regulus would often hide when their fights began, not wanting
to be anywhere near the bloodthirsty affair.

Regulus had never realized just how alike Sirius and their mother were. He had known they both
were stubborn, formed hard opinions with little fact, and that they could scream with the best of the
Black family tree. He hadn't known that they shared the same temper though. He had known Sirius
had a temper, but he never knew how similar it was to his mothers. The blind rage seemed to
almost take over their actions. The look in their eyes as their fury overtook them was eerily similar.

Regulus couldn't close his eyes without reliving the moment. He’d feel the breath leaving his lungs
and see the natural light grey eyes darkening with purpose. Regulus worried about what that
purpose was. Rationally he knew that his brother wouldn’t have actually killed him. He knew that
Sirius would’ve gotten a hold of himself before it went that far. Just like mother always managed to
get a hold herself before things turned critical. Sirius would snap back to himself just before he
would permanently damage Regulus, the way Walpurga did. Regulus had had many moments of
uncertainty when being punished by his mother. Eventually, he realized that she wouldn't risk
damaging him as it would damage the reputation of the family. While Sirius wouldn't have the
same worries, Regulus was certain that he would realize that it was his brother on the other end of
his anger and get a hold of himself before it was too late. He hoped he was right. If he wasn't then
Sirius might end up being worse than their mother, and that was saying something.
Regulus knew he shouldn’t dwell on what had happened but every time he caught a glimpse of his
brother in the Great Hall or the corridors he felt everything come back to him. To his credit,
Sirius’s eyes often met his guiltily before looking away. Sirius had technically apologized for his
behavior and he had called Regulus, Reg.

Reg or Reggie was what Sirius had always called his little brother when they were kids. He seldom
said Regulus’s full name, he had said it was way too posh. Regulus had managed to keep himself
strong that night until he had heard that nickname, a nickname he hadn’t heard in three years. His
friends only ever called him Regs, if they even called him by a nickname, which Regulus was
grateful for because Reggie wouldn’t sound the same coming from anyone else. He supposed that
James Potter had technically called him by that nickname on the train, but Regulus didn’t count it
as he said it as a way of teasing the young prefect rather than out of fondness for the boy.

James Potter was another person Regulus didn’t know what to do with. He had saved Regulus’ life,
even though Regulus thought that Sirius would’ve come to his senses, Potter hadn’t given his
brother the option. James had fought for Sirius to let Regulus breathe and then he had even
somehow knocked Sirius out of his rage. While Regulus felt grateful that James had saved him, he
also remembered why it was necessary. If James Potter could’ve kept his big mouth shut about
what Regulus knew none of this would’ve ever happened. Regulus had told James that he wouldn’t
be telling anyone, that he honestly didn’t care about Lupin’s full moon prowls. Yet, James still
ended up telling his brother. Regulus had never felt such strong hatred for another human being as
he did James Potter at the moment. He absolutely couldn’t wait for next Saturday where he could
kick the Gryffindors ass in Quidditch. Plus hopefully, the newly captained James Potter would cry
after the loss, fingers crossed.

Regulus’s conversation with Remus Lupin caused the boy even more confusion. He had never
expected to get along with the tall Gryffindor as easily as he did. Remus Lupin was more intelligent
than Regulus would've guessed. He hasn't talked to the boy since his first year and while he
remembers Remus being kind to him, he didn't seem particularly clever. In fact, Regulus always
thought that he was probably more like his brother and James than anything else. He knew that
Lupin studied quite a bit more than the rest of the boys but he didn't think that knowledge would be
so obvious. Regulus always found it quite obvious when someone was naturally intelligent or
intelligent because they studied constantly. He assumed Remus would be the latter but it turned out
he was the former. Regulus had found it easier to talk to Remus Lupin than it was to talk to his best
friends most of the time. While Regulus knew that he could never pursue a friendship with the
werewolf as his mother would never approve, he found himself wishing he could.

******************************************************************************

When the Saturday of the first quidditch game arrived Regulus woke up feeling as if he could
conquer the world. Or at least Gryffindor in today’s quidditch match. Regulus wasn’t exactly the
type of guy to get nervous about quidditch. He honestly never found quidditch all the difficult, he
wasn’t exactly cocky about it but he knew his own skills. Not to mention he held the record for
catching the most snitches in a single season, he had broken it in his fourth year and it was
previously held for 20 years. It was incredibly rare that a game went by that Regulus didn’t catch
the snitch. Now that doesn’t mean Slytherin necessarily won every game because sometimes their
cheating got in the way of them actually trying to score goals. Regulus however always got his job
done. So while he definitely wasn’t nervous for today's quidditch games he didn’t usually have this
feeling as if nothing could go wrong.

Regulus knew that today’s game was going to go great, that not only was he going to catch the
snitch but Slytherin was going to kick Gryffindor’s ass today. Especially his smug brother and the
even smugger team captain. Regulus couldn’t help but still be upset about James Potter and his big
mouth. That big mouth that got him in even deeper shit with Sirius. They already weren’t in a good
place but now they were in turmoil and it was all James Potter’s fault. Regulus was gonna make
sure that James Potter did not win his first game as captain. It was gonna be nice to see his sad
puppy dog eyes after he realizes that he never should’ve messed with Regulus Black. Regulus
practically bounded to the great hall for breakfast. When he got there the school was still pretty
empty as it was a Saturday morning and the game wasn’t till noon. There were a couple of
Regulus’s teammates already down there eating and Regulus gave them each a nod and sat at his
usual spot. He loaded up on protein and fruit, his captain would be very proud. Usually, Regulus
didn't eat that much especially before a game but today was a special occasion.

He was just starting in on his eggs when the entire Gryffindor quidditch team strolled in what
appeared to be practice clothes, they looked incredibly confident. Regulus hated that. He hated that
they were up early practicing. He hated that they didn’t look nervous. And he absolutely hated
when James Potter looked over and winked at Regulus. What a prick. Regulus shook it off and got
his head back in the game. This was gonna be his game and none of those Gryffindors could mess
that up.

When it was officially game time the Slytherin team captain Wulfric Mulciber was giving them a
pep talk, Regulus wasn’t really paying attention because, to be honest, he knew it was the same
bullshit speech Mulciber had been giving since he became captain. Blah Blah Blah cheat cheat
cheat blah blah blah, win. Regulus secretly wished that they’d focus more on the winning part of
his speech than the cheating but he certainly couldn’t say that to Mulciber or he wouldn’t make it
out of this game alive.

Regulus loved the sound of the cheering fans as the teams flew onto the field and the balls were put
in the play. He rose alongside the Gryffindor seeker, Marlene Mckinnon above the entire field.
Regulus liked to get a good view of the field and then he liked to take laps and check out the
corners of the pitch. Regulus wasn’t particularly worried about Marlene Mckinnon, she was a
decent seeker and all but she didn’t have much on Regulus. There were only four seekers in the
school at one time and Marlene was probably the second-best one but she competed more with the
other two than Regulus. He knew what her strategy would be during this game because it was the
same strategy the other seekers in the school take. She basically would ride his ass the entire game
and hope she was lucky enough to spot the snitch before him. Regulus didn't mind that though, in
fact, he thought it was easier to get the snitch when the other seeker was so close because he was
confident in his ability to be faster than the other seeker if they were close by. However, there
wouldn’t be much he could do if they saw it across the field first.
Regulus began watching the game as he circled. He saw that the score was already 10-20
Gryffindor. He knew that it wouldn’t be long before the penalty shots started being called. Sure
enough, less than ten minutes into the game James Potter received a penalty shot and scored of
course. James Potter almost always scored when he had the quaffle in his hand. As much as
Regulus hated to admit it, he had to, James Potter was an incredible quidditch player. He would
have no problem playing in the International Quidditch league. Regulus couldn't help but watch as
James flew across the field with the quaffle in his hand, barring down on the Slytherin chasers
daring them to get in his way. Avery clearly wanted to but James evaded them skillfully with a
sloth grip roll. Regulus was mesmerized for a minute before he realized that he was meant to be
looking for the snitch rather than watching the game.

About thirty minutes into the game Gryffindor was in the lead by forty points and the Slytherin
team was getting obvious with their cheating, so Regulus figured the sooner he found the snitch the
better. First, however, he wanted to get Mckinnon off his ass.

Regulus was high enough that he thought this would work and he knew her job was to follow him
tightly. So he gasped loudly and pulled into a sharp dive, barrelling towards the ground at an
insanely high speed. He thanked his lucky stars that he practiced this so much or he might end up
in the hospital wing after performing it. He had landed himself in the hospital with enough broken
bones when practicing it before, till he got it right anyways. He actually enjoyed the rush of
playing chicken with an immovable force like the ground. He could hear the crowd yelling and
cheering, clearly thinking that the game would either be won by one team or the other. Others were
loudly gasping that both seekers were hurtling towards the ground so fast. Regulus picked his
moment and literally at the last possible moment he could’ve he pulled up on his broom and rode
away his toes inches from the grass. He didn’t have to look behind to know what happened. He
could tell by the reaction of the crowd and the sound of someone hitting the grass behind him. He
had successfully ditched Mckinnon using the Wronski Feint.

He knew that she would be back on her broom soon enough and he wanted to have a little time by
himself to look for the snitch so he flew fast around the pitch looking for it. It seemed that even the
chasers and beaters of each team had gotten a bit distracted by the seeker’s interaction as when
Regulus pulled back up into gameplay they all seemed to be shaking off a stupor and were now
continuing the game. He could hear the cheering around him but he didn’t care about that,
everyone knew that no matter how well you perform in the game if you don’t win it doesn't matter.
Regulus circled the field for a few minutes searching and he knew McKinnon must be up by now
and would most likely catch up with him in a matter of minutes so he’s had to hustle.

Then he spotted it across the field and lunged quickly hoping McKinnon wasn't anywhere near it.
He was only about ten feet from it when all of a sudden he saw a bludger fly just in front of him
and someone bumped into him and he felt himself falling. Then someone was grabbing him to
steady him, it was James Potter. Fuck. The snitch. He tried to lunge past but Potter was in his way
and when he finally got past him he had a perfect view of Mckinnon catching the snitch. His god
damn snitch. Fucking Potter. The game was called by Madam Hooch and Regulus had never felt so
angry in his life. Regulus looked back at Potter and he had a guilty expression on his face but he
just shrugged and flew off to meet his team.

In the locker room, it was an all-you-can-hate James Potter special and everyone was in on it.
Everyone agreed that James Potter was the single reason why Regulus hadn’t caught the snitch and
therefore the reason Slytherin lost. They called him a dirty little cheat. Which Regulus was a little
too pissed to see the irony in, but would laugh about it later. Right now he was easily the most
pissed he’d ever been in his life. The Black family’s temper was flaring again and Regulus was the
worst tempered person in the locker room. Eventually, his ranting and tantrum got so bad that
Mulciber himself had to tell Regulus that he needed to cool off in the shower before he headed up
to the school. Hearing Mulciber of all people tell him that he was too worked up was a shock to his
system, maybe he was overreacting. He went in the showers after everyone had left and as he was
cleaning off when he realized that he definitely had a reason to be pissed off. He stormed out of the
shower and threw on some clothes. He marched into the Gryffindor locker room hoping that Potter
was still in there so he could give him a piece of his mind. He was and it turned out he was the last
one on his team in the locker room as well. He was throwing on a shirt when he saw an angry
Regulus Black march in.

He seemed shocked to see Regulus barging into the Gryffindor locker room, ”Listen Regulus, I am
sorry about what happened in the game, it was an accident.”

Regulus walked towards James, shoving him into the wall behind him. He leaned in close to his
face, with an expression of pure venom on his face. Regulus had about an inch in height on him but
James was a lot more filled out than Regulus. In fact, if Regulus didn't feel so angry right now he
might have felt a bit inferior to James Potter's broad shoulders and thick arms. They completely
dwarfed his lithe frame and delicate features.

Regulus's face twisted in disgust at his own thoughts about Potter's strapping body, ”Oh you’re
sorry? Bullshit. You ran into me on purpose and then you held on to me so that your seeker could
grab the snitch. That was a cheap-ass move Potter and not what I would expect from a holier than
thou Gryffindor.”

James scoffed, rolling his eyes in clear annoyance, ”It was an accident. If your teammates weren’t
cheating the entire game and throwing cheap bludger shots at me, then I wouldn’t have had to run
into you while I was dodging them.”

Regulus let out a cruel laugh before challenging his foe, “Oh, and how about when you grabbed
me and held me back while Mckinnon got the snitch. I mean come on you know that there was no
way she was getting that snitch without taking me out of the equation.”

James rolled his eyes, feeling his temper rise at the insult towards his friend, ”Merlin your fucking
ego is actually insane. Marlene is a damn good seeker--.”
Regulus interrupted in a taunting voice, “Yeah she’s good, but she’s not on my level and you know
that, don't you Potter? That is precisely why you cheated.”

James glared at the interruption, his face leaning closer to Regulus' as he gritted out,” Fine, you're
talented Regulus we get it, but I didn’t hold you back for her to get the snitch. I grabbed you
because you were about to fall a hundred feet to your death.”

Regulus practically spat venom at the Gryffindor captain, “Yeah well at least I would've still had a
chance to balance myself and catch the snitch, but no you took that option away from me.”

James looked like he had been slapped across the face, “Are you seriously angry at me for saving
your life? No quidditch game is worth you dying for, Regulus. Especially a simple game like this
one. What the fuck is wrong with you!”

Regulus got even closer, so close that he could feel James's breath on his face as he gritted out,”
Fuck you, Potter.”

James gripped Regulus’s shoulders and turned him, slamming him into the wall hard, ”No. Fuck
you, Black. Fuck you and your stupid arrogance. Fuck you and your stupid supremacy ideals." His
voice cracked a bit, full of emotion, ”Fuck you for being so intoxicatingly frustrating. And fuck
you for invading my mind, you prick."

They stared at each other, their faces only inches apart. The anger, the burning eyes, and their
breath touching each other's faces. All of these things could be reasons why it happened. Regulus
wasn't sure who moved first but either way in seconds their lips were crashing together in a fierce
kiss. It was all teeth, tongue, and force and damn did it feel good.

Their hands roam each other’s bodies, sliding everywhere they possibly can. Never quite having
their thirst for each other quenched. Regulus can feel James' taut muscles flexing underneath his
fingers as his hands roam the surface. James’s hands naturally find their home on Regulus’s ass
and he hitches him up. Regulus wraps his legs around James’s waist instinctively. Their kissing is
fierce, they press together in a way Regulus has never felt before. The friction is so inviting that
Regulus can hear himself moan, embarrassingly loud. James seems to find encouragement in the
sound, as he kisses Regulus harder. Regulus could not believe what was happening, but he knew it
was a terrible idea. He didn’t let himself think too much about this fact though, as he had never felt
something quite this good and didn’t want to lose it. He wanted to lose himself in the moment
instead.
Regulus feels himself being carried somewhere and soon he feels the cold surface of the benches
pressing into his back. They continue to kiss roughly while grinding together, creating friction that
drove Regulus absolutely mad. Regulus knew it was stupid and he knew that anyone could walk in
on them at any moment, but he couldn’t help himself. He was lost in the passion that was taking
place in that locker room at the moment.

Regulus felt absolute ecstasy and he had never felt that way in his life. The friction felt amazing
and he felt himself moaning into James’s mouth. Somehow James grinds down harder when he
hears this. Soon Regulus feels himself coming to orgasm, James following right behind him.

Potter pants heavily on top of Regulus. This moment of reality without the ecstasy makes Regulus
realize what the fuck just happened. He was not gay. Even if he was he certainly wouldn’t be into
James Potter of all people. The smug blood traitor that had recently created an even bigger rift
between Regulus and his brother, plus he had just lost Slytherin in the quidditch match. He was so
fucked. All he could think about was escaping as soon as possible. As soon as Potter stood up from
the bench, Regulus sat up. He felt flushed and annoyed with himself and Potter just sort of
awkwardly stared at Regulus while running his hand through his hair. Regulus stood up and
straightened his clothing, finally looking down at his wet crotch. Ew, what the actual fuck.

Regulus looked up at James and they stared into the eyes of each other for a few seconds before
Regulus scoffed and bit out at James,” Ugh thanks a lot Potter.” Then proceeded to storm out of the
locker room leaving a shocked James Potter behind.
 Second Times the Charm

James

It had been two weeks since the incident, James had taken to calling that even though it wasn't
exactly accurate. James couldn't think of any way better to describe it. Even though James had not
necessarily planned for it to happen and he didn't necessarily love the way it had happened. He had
to admit he enjoyed it, actually, he had loved it. He had loved the feeling of Regulus against him
and the sounds Regulus made. The heat in his kisses. It had made James burn deep in his gut.

James still wasn't sure exactly how it had happened. He knew Regulus would be mad after the
game, so he had expected some retaliation. Given that while James had saved him, he also
prevented him from getting the snitch. He didn't exactly feel great about it. He was glad they won.
Very glad, but he couldn't even enjoy the victory party later that night, because he knew that
Regulus Black should have caught the snitch. While the rest of the Slytherin team had more talent
for cheating than for the game of quidditch itself, that was not the case for Regulus Black. Regulus
was extremely talented and James knew he worked very hard for his quidditch team. James had
never seen Regulus cheat in a game, he didn’t have to cheat to catch the snitch. James didn't feel
like it was an honest win because of his interference. While he hadn't meant to interfere it still
hadn’t sat right with him.

What he had not expected was Regulus Black to storm into the Gryffindor locker room, still
dripping wet from the shower. The water was soaking through his clothes, clinging to his lean
muscles. Now that James thought about it Regulus had looked leaner than James had expected
from someone who practiced as much as Regulus did. He didn’t have time to ponder that thought
as Regulus had stomped over to him shoving him into the wall next to his locker.

One minute Regulus was screaming profanities into his face and the next James had flipped their
positions and had his tongue down the young Slytherins throat. He had no idea how it had
happened. He had no idea who had made the first move but someone had to of. James didn’t even
remember feeling particularly horny before it had happened. He hadn’t looked at Regulus’s pretty
eyes and thought about how they’d look sparkling in pleasure. He hadn’t looked at Regulus’s soft
hair and thought about what it would feel like to run his hands through it. He certainly hadn’t
looked at Regulus’ pink lips and thought about how kissable they looked. No, he hadn’t had any of
those thoughts before the incident had occurred. James did remember thinking about how he could
get Regulus to stop screaming at him though. He hadn’t made a decision on that before their lips
had crashed together.

James hated to admit it, and he would die before telling Sirius this, but he had never had a better
kiss than he had with Regulus Black. The other stuff had felt pretty good too. James had had plenty
of kisses in his young life, but never with another boy. James had no problem with two boys
kissing, hell Remus did that and he loved Remus to death. He just had never thought that it was
something he would be into. He had always liked women. The way they looked, the way they
talked, and the way they felt against him. Hell he'd even had a long-standing crush on Lily Evan
since their first year. He had never had any reason to expect that he might also enjoy men. He
guessed he couldn’t deny it now, because he had enjoyed what he had done with Regulus Black.
He knew it was wrong and that Sirius would kill him if he found out, but James had never felt as
connected as he had with Regulus Black in the locker room. What he had done with Regulus was
almost like an experiment and James wanted to experiment some more. He wanted to know if it
was just a fluke, or if he would enjoy it every time with Regulus. And if so, would he enjoy it with
other men?

He wasn't sure, he had found a few men he thought of as attractive before but he didn’t necessarily
want to kiss them. He had always thought Sirius was handsome, Remus was definitely not bad to
look at either, and he had always thought Gideon Prewitt was an attractive man. He had never
wanted to be with any of them though. Regulus Black was the only one he had actually felt
attracted to strongly enough to act on. That's kind of how he was with women too. He found plenty
of women attractive, but only certain women made him want to act on it. He supposed he was
bisexual, or maybe there was a different name for what he was. He tried not to dwell on it too
much because it was too confusing for him.

James really wanted to discuss what had happened after the quidditch match with Regulus. He
wanted to see if Regulus was feeling the same as he was, about the incident. It was becoming
impossible as James had not seen Regulus anywhere lately. He had seen brief glimpses of him in
the Great Hall before Regulus darted away. Or occasionally in the corridors with Regulus again
ducking behind other people. If James didn't know any better, he'd say Regulus was hiding from
him.

Though he supposed it was possibly a coincidence, James had never noticed how much Reg was
around, before this week. Whether that was the case or not, James knew that tonight Reg could not
avoid him. They had their second prefect round together tonight, Regulus won't be able to avoid
him any longer. James didn't know why the head girl had decided that they would be a good pair,
but he kind of wanted to send her a thank-you note right now.

James knew he was going to bring up the situation with Regulus because he needed to know how
Regulus felt about it and he needed to know if Regulus wanted to do it again. It's not the James
liked Regulus, in fact, he thought Regulus was rather, too Slytherin, but that didn't mean he
couldn't be attracted to him.

He finally dragged himself up out of bed and away from his thoughts about a certain Slytherin, to
go for a run. While he didn't love getting up this early, he knew that it was all worth it as it would
keep him in fighting shape for quidditch.

He went for a run every morning at 6 and every morning he asked if his roommates wanted to join
him. Every morning Peter would groan and mumble and fall back asleep within a minute of waking
him. When he tried to wake Remus, all he would hear was slight laughter and then silence, which
he took as a no. Sirius often threw his pillow at James when he tried to wake him up.

Then after he realized it was a lost cause he would begin his morning exercise by himself. His run
was about 45 minutes long just around the school grounds before he headed up, showered, and
went to breakfast. Usually about 10 minutes into breakfast, the rest of his roommates would drag
themselves out of bed and join him for the last half of his breakfast. At this point, Sirius would
check if he had any last homework he needed to finish before class and usually he did. Then he
would spend up until the last minute before class, getting it finished and still managed to receive a
good grade. James wished he could do that. He got pretty good grades himself and he was in the
top quarter of his class, but he still needed to study and actually put in some effort. Unlike Sirius
who skated by and somehow still managed to beat him in classes. Remus on the other hand was at
the very top of the class only behind Lily Evans. Peter just managed to beat the top half and he
worked incredibly hard to get that way. They all had their little study routines and it seemed to
work well enough for them, so James didn't care one way or the other.

His first class of the day was Transfigurations. Which was always fun, because Sirius and he would
partake in their favorite in-class activities. They would take turns calling Professor McGonagall the
nickname Minnie, and they would throw papers at the back of Snivellous’ head. Usually at least
one of them would get detention by that time.

Next, he had Herbology which he absolutely hated. It was ridiculously boring staring at plants all
day. Although occasionally one of the plants got violent and that usually livened up a class period.

After Herbology he had Potions class, which is another class he had with the Slytherin,
unfortunately. So he and Sirius usually attempted to provoke Snape and the other snakes into
hexing them in front of Slughorn. Which would provoke the Slytherins into trying to hex them.
Which usually would result in detention for the little snakes, which always made James happy.

Then he had lunch in the Great Hall, where James would stuff himself full and basically be useless
for the rest of the day.

He then had Care of Magical Creatures with Peter next. That was always interesting because Peter
would inevitably forget some kind of homework or some instruction with the creatures. Which
would result in him being a nervous wreck the rest of the class period.

His last class of the day was double charms with the Ravenclaws. He usually sat near Dorcas and
Mary, as they were his closest friends in this class. It sort of made James miss the time before they
could choose their own classes. He missed having every class with his best friends. While he had
friends in every class it wasn't all his friends, which made him sad.
After his classes, it was finally time for Quidditch practice, his absolute favorite time of the day.
He loved quidditch practice, especially since he became captain. James had always been more
serious about quidditch than most people, so the fact that he could now control when and how
much effort his team put into practice was an addictive feeling. He loved being able to tell his team
to focus and having them actually listen, even though Sirius did whine about it usually. He loved
joking around with Marlene Mckinnon while helping her do her snitch training.

Tonight, however, he was feeling pretty anxious for his prefect rounds. So he was actually kind of
excited when quidditch ended. Sirius was asking him nonstop questions about why they had ended
on time, for the first time all year. James ignored him, he figured why would he explain himself?
And how would he explain himself to Sirius? Sirius would never believe that James was actually
eager to go to his prefect rounds cause he found it fun. Sirius also happened to know that Regulus
was his partner for the night, which resulted in him making comments the entire day that James
should hex him. Or how they should prank him during the night.

James turned him down every time only humoring him with the hexing jokes because there was no
way Sirius would actually go through with hexing his brother. Sirius never liked to include
Regulus in their mischief. Besides, James wanted something else from Regulus tonight, other than
a laugh.

The Marauders and some of the girls were all studying in the common room before James had to
leave for his prefect rounds. Right as he was getting up to leave Sirius pulled him aside to talk to
him privately, James wondered what he could possibly have to say.

He seemed a little awkward in his stance and he rubbed the back of his head before speaking,
“Listen James, I know you're meeting with Regulus tonight and I'm just a little concerned that
Regulus is going to freak out about the game to you. He seemed raving mad after it and while
Regulus isn't particularly hard-headed. He does have the same temper as me, deep down, so just be
careful tonight, okay? If he yells at you, just punch the little brat.”

James laughed, not really knowing what to say. He had never told Sirius that they had already
talked, or more accurately yelled, about their issues. He didn't see how he could tell Sirius about
that but not about the rest. He was definitely not going to be telling Sirius about the rest of their
time in the locker room, so he thought it was better to keep it all to himself. Now he was beginning
to regret that decision. He didn't like lying to Sirius in the first place and he felt bad that Sirius was
worried about Regulus and his prefect round together.

James couldn't help but tell him one more lie to make Sirius feel better, “Don't worry Sirius, it's
been two weeks. I'm sure he's over it by now and besides the last prefect around, we didn't hardly
talk at all. Except for when he let it slip that he knew about Remus’s situation. So I doubt we'll talk
at all tonight either, he's pretty quiet.”

Sirius nodded looking a little abashed by his fretting over his friend, “Yeah, I guess you're right. I
shouldn't really worry about it. It's not like you can't take Regulus in a fight if you need to
anyways. Just let me know if anything happens later, okay?”

James nodded, wondering what it would be like to fight with Reg. Pinning him down underneath
himself as he did in the locker room. Manhandling his toned little body. He could not wait for their
prefect rounds tonight.

James flushed, embarrassed and guilty by his line of thought, right in front of Sirius, “Yeah Pads,
of course, I will let you know if anything happens. I better get going otherwise I will leave him
waiting and I know you Black’s are not a patient bunch.”

Sirius laughed at James’s teasing, “You should leave the little brat waiting. That’d almost be as
good as hexing him.”

James laughed at him and patted his back, finally finding his opening to head out the door. His
opening to finally seeing Reg again. As soon as he stepped out of the portrait he spotted Regulus
not far down the hall, waiting outside of Minnie’s office.

He smiled to himself at the sight of the tall Slytherin and walked confidently over to him, “Little
Black, good to see you old chap. Ready for another exciting night of walking around an empty
school.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, dramatically in James' opinion, but he didn't say anything. He turned away
from James and began walking down the hall at a brisk pace. Apparently, prefect rounds had
begun.

James had to jog to catch up to him until he fell in stride beside him, “Hey slow down there
speedster. It's not like we don't have to be out all night looking anyways. No need to sweat from
prefect rounds.”

Regulus didn't look at him as he responded in a snarky tone, “I'd just rather get this over with
sooner rather than later. So if you would shut up and focus on rounds that'd be great.”
James, who was looking at Regulus nearly the whole time they were walking, did not want to shut
up and focus on rounds. All he wanted to focus on was how pretty Reg looked today, though he did
look a bit tired.

James spoke, not wanting to veer off his train of thought without a possibility of a repeat
performance from Regulus, “Come on Reggie, it's not going to be that bad. It's not like I'm going to
bite you. Though would you really mind if I did?”

That sentence caused Reggie to stutter in his step a bit before continuing his long strides. He still
didn't say anything, so James proceeded to speak hoping that he could shock Reggie into talking,
“Besides you shouldn't pretend like you hate doing prefect rounds with me, it could hurt my ego.
And I already know I'm your favorite person to do rounds with.”

Regulus rolled his eyes and spoke in a sarcastic tone, “How can you tell? By my go-getter attitude?
By my wide smile. Or by the perk in my step. Oh, and your ego needs to be knocked down more
pegs than just a few.”

James couldn't believe somebody could be so sarcastic. He always thought Sirius was the most
sarcastic person he'd ever met, but the more he got to know Regulus, the more Regulus put his
brother to shame. Clearly, Regulus had not been eager to see James during prefect rounds as James
had been. It made him wonder if he was the only one who had enjoyed the other night or not. He
worried about it a minute before his memory of Regulus’s moans filled he hears. James suddenly
felt a renewed interest in approaching the subject to Regulus tonight.

He wondered how he could bring up the situation without it being too obvious how excited he was
to talk about it. So James responded as casually as he could manage, “No it was by your flushed
cheeks and the new cologne you're wearing. Not to mention your hair looks much tamer than it did
last prefect rounds we had together.”

At his words, Regulus flushed deeper, which quickly caused him to turn away from James in an
attempt to make sure James didn't notice. James had noticed though, which means he didn't put too
much stock into what Regulus said next, “You are repulsive, Potter.”

James quipped back, not missing a beat with his challenge, “You don't really think that, Reg. And
you certainly aren't thinking that right now.”

Regulus snapped back, getting heated, “I always think you're repulsive. You are a disgusting flea
on society's back.”
James didn't take anything Regulus said to heart, though he did marvel at his ability to insult those
around him in an almost elegant way. He knew Regulus had a remarkably sharp tongue, and he
figured it was best that he didn't take anything seriously. He did, however, decide this was his
opening to mention the night,” Huh, that's weird. I didn't get that impression from you a couple
weeks ago in the locker room.”

James loved the reaction from Regulus his words had caused. Regulus’s eyes got comically wide,
his face flushing even darker, and him stiffening his back. Then he stopped completely, turning
towards James, which made James turn to look back at him. He was smirking and he knew he
looked like a smug asshole, but he couldn't help himself. This was exactly the kind of response he
wanted from Regulus.

The boy in question whipped his head to both sides, even though it was past curfew, and no one
was supposed to be out of bed. He seemed to be worried that somebody would hear them.

Then he spoke in a dark whisper, that he had clearly tried to make sound threatening, spoiler alert it
didn't, “I thought we had agreed never to speak of that abomination of a night again.”

James quirked his brow at Regulus's description of the night, “Oh, really? I don't remember ever
having that discussion. I certainly don't remember anything abominable about that night.”

Regulus retorted back, whispering louder now, “It wasn't a verbal discussion. I assumed you were
at least intelligent enough to get that I didn't want to ever discuss it again, from me storming away.
Therefore you shouldn't mention it to anyone ever again.”

James laughed loudly, “I just thought you ran away so you could jerk off again thinking about it
later.”

Regulus’s eyes got even wider and he quickly grabbed James’s wrist and pulled him into the
closest broom cupboard. It was pretty cozy in there, James had to admit. He liked where this was
going. He knew that keeping them in tight quarters was not Regulus's intention, but it didn't mean
that he couldn't enjoy it anyways. He moved close to Regulus as soon as the door had closed, “Oh
care for a repeat?”

Regulus shoved him back deeper into the closet, it wasn't very large. So James only stepped back a
couple feet before he was stopped by the back of the closet.
Regulus gritted out in a dark voice,” What the hell is wrong with you? Why would you even say
that in the middle of the fucking corridor? Are you crazy? Do you know what would happen if
anybody found out? I can't even imagine. The idea that I would be with somebody like you is
repulsive.”

Now James was feeling a little challenged. He was originally going to let Regulus go at his own
pace and hoped that maybe he could get another kiss tonight, but now he felt like Regulus needed a
little push. He knew Regulus was just being his classic defensive self, never admitting that he
enjoyed anything because that would go against the code of the Black Family. It was just like when
Regulus tried to tell James that he didn't want to be a professional quidditch player, “because he
had other plans for the future”. James wasn't stupid. He knew those other plans were Walpurga's
plans, not her sons.

James knew that Regulus had enjoyed their night. He could tell and he just wanted Regulus to
admit it. So, he stepped closer to Regulus, which caused Regulus to take a step back forgetting that
they were in a small closet. He stepped right back against the wall and James Stepped even closer.
They only had about six inches apart from them now

James lowered his tone and it came out in a husky drawl, “Oh, really? Is that how you're going to
play?”

Regulus looked slightly concerned as if he was worried that James would try to kiss him again.
Probably more worried about how he would respond than anything. James didn't step any closer
but he did lean in putting his mouth only a hair's length away from Regulus' ear. He made sure his
hot breath fell over Regulus. He loved the way Regulus shivered, he actually shivered.

James continued not expecting a response from Reggie, “I'm repulsive? Huh? Really, I'm so
repulsive that you are quaking in anticipation of what's to come. I'm so repulsive that you came in
your pants while grinding against me. I'm so repulsive that you shoved your tongue down my
throat.”

James pulled back slightly so that he was only about 3 inches from Regulus’s face. Regulus had his
eyes trained on him, not saying anything. That is until he broke the silence seconds later,” Damn
you, Potter.”

The next thing James knew Regulus, had his tongue down his throat. James’s hands found
Regulus' wrists and put them above his head, holding them in one of his own. He was surprised to
find that for a tall man, Regulus’s wrists were tiny. He put his other hand on Regulus’s face as he
dug his tongue deeper into his mouth. Regulus was squirming against him as if he couldn't control
himself. James couldn't help but smile against Regulus' lips, at the thought of making Regulus
Black lose control.

Regulus pulled back from the kiss, his voice raspy as he said, “Don't act so smug, Potter. Just kiss
me.”

Which James was happy to comply with. Kissing Regulus Black was incredible. It felt like a drug,
a drug that James never wanted to get off of. A drug that he would let ruin his life if he could feel
this feeling again.

Eventually, James started to trail off of Reg’s mouth. Kissing his cheek, then right next to his ear,
down his neck nipping as he went along until he started undoing Regulus’s buttons on his shirt. At
this point he let go of Regulus’s hands, not being able to hold them as he undid the buttons.
Regulus grasped James’s hair, pulling. James had to admit, although it hurt slightly, it hurt in a
good way.

James only got Regulus’ shirt halfway unbuttoned before he dropped to his knees in front of
Regulus. He had to admit he was slightly nervous. He'd never actually done this with anybody
before. He knew it was something that he would try eventually, especially if he was ever with a
man, but he still didn't know exactly how it was done. He had to admit the idea of making Regulus
black can come undone with just his mouth made him shiver with anticipation. So he began to
unbutton Regulus’s jeans while taking a quick peek up at Regulus' face to see him wide-eyed as if
he couldn't believe what was happening. He was panting and James loved that sight. His hair was
messy like James had never seen it before and it looked so sexy.

Once James got Regulus his pants undone, he pulled them down to his ankles. Regulus teetered a
little bit, but then he leaned himself against the wall and steadied himself. James then proceeded to
pull down Regulus’ briefs and took Regulus into his mouth. As he continued pleasuring the boy in
front of him, he made a habit of looking up at Regulus. He loved seeing the faces Reg made as he
came undone. He would gasp, trying desperately to be quiet, but it seemed James had found the
one thing that would make Regulus break his silence. When Regulus was getting close to his
release he started moaning, while biting his lip. His eyes shut, head thrown back against the wall in
wanton pleasure. When he was released, James wondered at the taste but found himself swallowing
anyway.

He got off his knees and immediately grabbed Regulus by the back of the head, pulling him into a
deep kiss. He wasn't sure if Regulus would enjoy the taste of himself in James’s mouth, but he
found he didn't care much either way. He was surprised that after a minute of kissing he felt
Regulus’s hand undoing his belt.

While he knew that it was the polite thing to do to return the favor, he had to admit he had expected
Regulus Black to be a selfish lover, perhaps even a bit of a brat. James found he would've liked
either way, but he found Regulus’ is giving nature to be very pleasing. Regulus didn't get on his
knees for James, but he did put his hand in James’ pants, stroking him as they made out until he
found his own release. They both parted, James, grabbing his wand and whispering a quick
cleaning spell on his pants while Regulus began buttoning up his shirt.

James figured that he should act quickly before Regulus ran out on him like he had the last time,
“Well, shall we continue with rounds?”

Regulus looks slightly shocked as if he couldn't believe that James was suggesting that they
continue their prefect rounds after what they had just done. He seemed as if he was about to say so,
but James continued, “We skipped out on prefect rounds early last time, so we should probably
finish it today, don't you think?”

The remainder of his commitment as a prefect was probably the only reason Regulus stayed with
James and continued their rounds for the night.

Regulus straightened his clothes and made sure to put a haughty facial expression on, “Alright let's
get this over with, but let's just agree not to talk about what just happened ever again.

They began walking again on their rounds and there was silence once again, but James found this
was more of comfortable silence. There wasn't as much tension in the air as there had been before
they had visited the broom cupboard.

Just as they were walking past a bathroom on the fourth floor Regulus stopped suddenly. James
gave him an inquisitive look and Regulus motioned towards the door to the bathroom and said,”
Well, go in.”

James was confused by the turn of events. They weren't required to check bathrooms on their
prefect rounds. James had to ask,” Why would we need to go in there? We don't have to check the
bathrooms.``

Regulus rolled his eyes and looked at James with his eyebrows raised, waiting for James to get the
point, “So I can wash my hands and so you can wash out your mouth.”

James suddenly felt like the stupidest person alive. Of course, Regulus wouldn't want to walk
around with his hand smelling like James's dick. Especially when he would be going back to
Slytherin's common room. James definitely didn't want to walk back to the common room and have
Sirius smell cum on his breath. So they went into the bathroom and cleaned themselves up.

They continued rounds with light conversation, but only when they found a few students out of
bed. They had to take house points from them. Then they continued on their way.

When they were in the dungeons and Regulus was close to his common room James spoke to
Regulus once more, “I know you enjoyed what happened the other week and what happened
tonight. I enjoyed it too and I definitely think that you're right. We shouldn't tell anyone about it but
I also thought maybe if you felt like experimenting a little bit more we could do that too. All
secretive, of course."

Regulus looked slightly surprised, he clearly had already decided to pretend that the first part of
their prefect rounds had never happened. He didn't say anything for a couple of minutes.

Then he turned to James just as they were at the Slytherin entrance to the common room, ”I'll think
about it, okay?” Then he turned and walked into the common room leaving James behind.

As James walked back up to the Gryffindor common room his thoughts were all on Regulus Black.
If he had thought that he would stop thinking about him after their prefect round tonight and their
dalliance in the broom closet, he was completely wrong. If anything his thoughts were more
occupied with Regulus Black than they had been before. He hoped more than anything that
Regulus would agree to his proposal.
 Breaking Point

Regulus

Sometimes Regulus wondered why he did it. Why did he put so much pressure on himself? Why
did he let his parents put so much pressure on him? He knew that their demands were irrational and
he knew that he was irrational for attempting to meet their standards. He allowed them to push him
around and to push him to his limit.

He was self-aware enough to realize when he was struggling and he certainly was right now. He
probably has been struggling for many years if he was honest with himself. He might have been
struggling his whole life. Maybe everything would be worth the struggle in the end or maybe it
would kill him.

His parents weren't good people, Regulus understood that. Yet he couldn't help but love them
anyway. He couldn't help but want to make them proud of him. They were his parents and they
were supposed to love him.

If James Potter could be believed, then a parent's love was supposed to be unconditional and
immense. Regulus wasn't sure that he wanted James to be right because if James was right then
Regulus’s parents were capable of love but he just wasn't worthy of it.

He knew that his mother at least loved Sirius at one point, but he didn't think that was true
anymore. Regulus wasn't sure his mother had ever felt love for him, his father for sure only felt
indifference. They didn't hate him the way they did Sirius currently, but they certainly didn't love
him the way they had loved Sirius growing up. Then again if they had loved Sirius so much then
why did they drive him away.

His parents had to know how much he was struggling right now, yet they didn't seem to care. The
only letters he received from his mother were all about how he needed to work harder. He tried his
best to do what they wanted.

All Regulus seemed to be focusing on these days was making them proud and trying to reach their
expectations, so that maybe they would finally love him. He didn't know if that was possible, day
after day he worked himself to the limit. He was barely hanging on. He hardly slept at night and he
knew he was getting thinner after all the meals he'd been skipping, added to the fact that he worked
on quidditch for hours every day. It was unhealthy, yet he knew his parents would not care as long
as he became the heir they wanted.
Regulus knew his thoughts were dark and that he was probably being melodramatic, that's what his
mother would say anyway. He just wasn't sure he’d be able to continue as he was and they were
only about two months into school. He was positively exhausted.

Soon his next quidditch game would come up, and Regulus didn't know if he would be able to
perform the way he usually did. In practice, he was dragging and feeling permanently tired all the
time. In classes, he would catch himself zoning out, which would, in turn, stress him out even more
because he might miss something that would be on the OWLs exam. It was an endless cycle of
trying to make his parents proud and trying to survive each day through intense studying habits.

Not to mention he couldn't stop thinking about his last prefect round. It had been three days since
James Potter and he had a dalliance of sorts in a broom closet. Dalliance wasn't exactly the correct
word for what had happened, but Regulus didn't want to call it anything crude, so dalliance would
have to do.

James Potter, who was arguably the most popular boy in school, had decided that he wanted
Regulus. Regulus didn't know if anybody had ever wanted him. He was always a second choice or
no choice at all.

While he knew it was an insane idea and that James Potter was positively idiotic for suggesting it,
he couldn't help but feel proud that somebody actually wanted him. Wanted him enough to lie to
their best friend about their relationship, because that's what James would be doing if Regulus
agreed.

Not that Regulus was considering it. Regulus wasn't stupid, he knew it was a dumb idea, and
getting into that type of arrangement, especially with how he's been feeling lately, was ridiculous.
He didn't have time to get into any kind of relationship with James Potter, even if it was just a
sexual one.

He didn't have time for anything really. His friends were pestering him more and more about
spending time with them and cutting back on his studies. Regulus was getting sick of it, he just
wanted everyone to leave him alone and let him do what he needed to do. It's not like he would get
lonely. He'd spent his whole life alone practically.

He was alone at the moment as well. He had just split off from Evan and Barty after their charms
class. More specifically after he watched Evan hex is a muggle-born in the back. Barty had
chuckled lightly, while Regulus had felt sick to his stomach. He didn't say anything, of course, he
couldn't imagine what they would say if he did but he didn't feel good about it. Not because she
was a muggleborn obviously. He just thought that Evan was being very immature.
The girl had only been a third year and she had happened to be all alone. Easy pickings and
Regulus thought that wasn't exactly fair to the girl. Regulus thought it was ridiculous and he
assumed that Barty would have felt the same, but he hadn't. So Regulus made an excuse to run
back to the dorms before their next class, to get some space from them.

His next class was Astronomy so Regulus would have to take a bunch of stairs to go down to his
dorm first and then, even more, to get up to the highest point in the building. He knew that he
would be dead tired by the time he got up to the astronomy tower after traveling up all those stairs.
It would be worth it to get away from Evan’s bragging about hexing that Hufflepuff.

As he was traveling back up the stairs after visiting his dorm room, he was seriously wondering
how the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws traveled up these stairs every time they went to their common
room.

He was currently in the second-floor corridor back staircase. It was a more secluded stairwell that
Regulus preferred over the crowded grand staircase, especially lately as he seemed to get more
winded than usual from the stairs.

Lately, every time he went up the stairs, he ended up panting heavily. It was embarrassing for a
star quidditch player to get winded from something so simple. In fact, lately, quidditch practice
was taking way too much out of him to be healthy. He was supposed to be in the best shape of his
life, yet he’d often finished practice out of breath and sweaty. This wouldn't be odd except Regulus
hardly ever sweat usually, even during intense games, but lately, his body had gone through the
wringer. His body was just really struggling these days.

He had just made it up to the third floor when he heard something loud and breathy next to him.
He turned all around looking for the source of the sound before he realized he was making that odd
noise. He was wheezing. Regulus Black was actually wheezing.

Once again he thanked Merlin that he was alone in the stairwell, or he might have just offed
himself from the embarrassment of the situation. If his mother could see him now, he would be
punished viscously.

He knew he had to hurry to make it to Astronomy class otherwise he would be late, but as he stared
at the stairs in front of him, he realized he couldn't find the energy to climb them. He had no
energy left to do anything but lean against the wall staring at those stone steps.

Merlin when had he become so weak. This must be how his mother had always seen him.
He had to make it to class, Barty and Evan never took good notes, and Regulus knew today's
discussion would be on the end-of-year exams.

He felt so lightheaded. He had felt slightly faint often enough lately that he hardly noticed the
sensation anymore, now though the world was spinning.

He struggled to get his footing right to continue up the stairs as he had his hand pressed against the
wall trying to walk his way to the next stairwell. Every step he took seemed to extend his journey
until it seemed as if the first step was a mile away instead of a yard.

His vision began to blur until he couldn't see the stairs in front of him at all. He realized that he was
not going to make it to Astronomy. He hoped that Barty would pull through and take sufficient
notes.

He felt his knees weakening and he began sliding down the wall until he was sitting against the
wall at an awkward angle that he couldn't be bothered to adjust. He leaned his head against the
wall feeling so tired.

He was so tired. He could hear his breath coming out in hot puffs. He couldn't understand what
was happening.

What was going on with him? All he could think about was that this was going to mess up his
study schedule.

When his vision started to darken and then it all went black.

******************************************************************************

James

James was having a pretty good day. He had just found out that he received an outstanding on his
History of Magic paper on the Magical Cooperation Act of 1842. This was pretty impressive
considering he never paid attention in that class, though Moony’s notes definitely helped him write
his paper.

He was also looking forward to his quidditch practice later tonight, which always put him in a great
mood. While he still hadn't heard from Regulus on his proposal to experiment together, he was
pretty hopeful on that too.
Yesterday James had caught Regulus’s gaze in the Great Hall and they had held it for longer than
was natural. Not to mention the fact that Regulus wasn't actively avoiding him anymore. Though it
brought James’s attention to how tired Regulus always seemed to look lately, he figured he'd have
to do something about that soon. Regulus couldn't be this tired if he was getting eight hours of
sleep.

James was also in a good mood because Halloween was coming up. Which meant that the
Marauders would be planning their signature Halloween prank. While his friends and he did pranks
all the time, none of them quite measured up to their Halloween ones. They still had a lot of
planning to do, but James secretly thought that the planning of the prank was the best part anyway.

Sirius and James were the first two of the Marauders in the Great Hall for dinner tonight. Usually,
Peter beat them there, because he loved food but tonight he had decided to take a quick nap before
dinner began.

Which in turn led to Moony spending the last twenty minutes trying to get him out of bed. That kid
loved sleeping. Remus had told them to go down without him and that they would come later.
James always thought it was amazing how Peter could be out like a rock once he fell asleep. Peter
was just lucky that Moony cared too much about him missing supper to let him sleep.

Once Sirius and James had begun loading up their plates, James noticed something. All around
them were whispers and as James looked around he noticed that a lot of people were staring at
him.

James didn't think this was particularly weird because Sirius and he were quite popular and people
often stared at them, usually just third-years who thought they were cute. This time it was odd,
though, because seventh years were looking at them as well. People from the Slytherin, Hufflepuff,
Ravenclaw, and Gryffindor tables were all looking at them.

James had never felt more like he walked in the Great Hall wearing no clothes then he did today.
Though once looking down and seeing his fully equipt uniform that theory went out the door. He
thought maybe something was on his face so he wiped it quickly and as subtly as he could.

Though it soon became apparent that the whispering and staring wasn't aimed at him, at all.
Everyone was staring at Sirius. James wondered if Sirius had performed a prank without him or
something.
Sirius didn't seem to notice anything particularly unusual about the atmosphere in the Great Hall,
as he continued piling his plate full of food. James glanced over at the Slytherin table to see if his
Regulus was there, he wasn't. That wasn't particularly odd as it seemed he was skipping out on a lot
of meals, lately. However, he noticed Regulus' two friends looked serious, concerned even. That
was rather odd, as it seemed that the Rosier kid was never without a cruel smile.

He leaned over to Sirius and murmured quietly, “Hey Pads, do you know what is going on?”

“What do you mean Prongs?” Sirius looked up from his plate of food and finally seemed to notice
the stares. He whipped his head all around the hall with a confused expression on his face, “What
the hell is wrong with everyone?”

James shrugged, not knowing himself, so he leaned over to Marlene McKinnon, who was sitting
not too far from him, “Marls, what's going on?”

She looked up at James but once she noticed Sirius she flickered her eyes back down to her plate.
That was odd, James wondered if they were fighting again.

She seemed to debate answering long enough for Lily Evans to join in on the interaction. The girls
seemed to be having a nonverbal discussion with their eyes until Marlene nodded and Lily spoke
up.

She spoke with a cautious voice, which was not common for Lily, “Sirius. They will probably be
wanting you in the hospital wing soon.”

James felt his eyebrows furrow. He looked at his friend for any kind of confirmation of what Lily
had said. He found none, but he noticed the faint traces of concern on Sirius’s face as he considered
why he would be needed in the hospital wing.

“What are you talking about Evans?” Sirius asked quickly then he turned to Marlene, “Marls?”

James could see that Sirius wanted his girlfriend to be the one to tell him whatever was going on,
but Marlene clearly didn't know what to say. She opened her mouth slightly like she was gonna
reply but quickly closed her mouth and looked at Lily. James had never seen Marlene Mckinnon as
a loss for words.
Lily nodded slightly at her friend and turned to the boys, ” Uh so Sirius, I assumed someone would
have come talk to you already. But someone found him passed out in a back stairwell. No one is
really sure what happened. They don't think someone did it, but no one really knows.”

James knew there was no debate over who she was talking about. There would be no other reason
why everyone would be weary to tell Sirius something or even say his brothers name, considering
their relationship.

Still, James felt that he had to know, even though a glance at Sirius told him that he knew already.

James had to clear his throat to get the words out, “Who? Who was it?”

Lily fixed him with an expression that was a mix between a glare and pitying expression, “It was
your brother Sirius.”

James didn't know if that was the confirmation Sirius needed to act or if he had just finally snapped
out of his shock from the mention of his brother. The next moment Sirius sprang up from his seat
and marched out of the Great Hall.

James quickly followed his best friend, knowing that he would need him. While he was attempting
to follow Sirius, a million questions were running through his head. What had happened? Had
Regulus been attacked? Which one of those psychotic snakes had done it? Why had no one come to
get Sirius? Why had the professors let him find out from rumors?

He finally caught up with Sirius’s fast march to the hospital wing. James matched his fast pace and
hesitantly spoke,” Are we going to the hospital wing?”

Sirius looked at him and James finally noticed the fear in his eyes, “Obviously James, my brother
is there.”

James grabbed his arm to slow him down and asked him the question that had been weighing on
him since Sirius got up from the table, “Are you sure that's a good idea? After what happened the
last time you saw him?”

Sirius pulled his arm away and glared at James, “Yes, I am all he has here, James. I have to see if
he's okay. I have to know what happened to him?”
So James followed him silently the rest of the trip. When they got to the hospital, the doors were
shut. That usually meant that Madam Pomfrey was busy with whoever was in it and did not want to
be disturbed for anything short of a medical emergency.

Sirius wasted no time in flinging the doors open with James, following closely behind him.

There were three professors gathered around a bed, alongside Madam Pomfrey. Dumbledore,
McGonagall, and Slughorn were all there surrounding a very unconscious Regulus Black.

They all looked to the door at the loud slam it made as it opened abruptly. Madam Pomfrey seemed
ready to yell at whoever was coming through the door until she noticed who it was. Their facial
expressions were subdued as if they were not sure what to say to Sirius as he walked quickly to his
brother's side.

While James walked slower behind him, feeling a bit like he was intruding. He wasn't family to
Regulus, but he was family to Sirius and he felt like he needed to be there for him.

Minerva McGonagall stepped towards Sirius, she laid her hand on his shoulder with a solemn
expression. Sirius stared down at his brother on the bed looking shocked.

James finally stepped forward, his need to comfort Sirius outweighing his awkwardness. It was
then that he saw Regulus. Regulus was lying on the bed, looking dead. James now understood the
haunted look on Sirius’s face. Regulus was pale, paler than he was generally. He had large, dark
circles around his eyes and his mouth was slightly slack. His usually thick black hair looked thin
and weak. He had obviously lost weight since he started the school year. It was unnerving, to say
the least.

James wondered how Regulus was even flying anymore? With all the weight he’d lost his balance
would be way out of whack, not to mention he looked as if he could barely stand let alone play
quidditch.

James had moved and was now standing next to his best friend. At his movement, Sirius seemed to
snap out of his shock to ask the golden question, “What’s wrong with him?”

Madam Pomfrey answered in a professional voice, “We're not sure yet. He was found in a back
stairwell that was rarely used so he might have been there for a while. He was leaned against the
wall passed out. We don't think there was any foul play here as he seems to be relatively unharmed.
He is sleeping at the moment. I have some tests running at the moment, so we will know more
soon.”
Sirius snapped, obviously angry at the lack of information, “Unharmed? Are you fucking joking!”
James flinched at the venom in his friend's voice.

McGonagall reprimanded him for his language but then softened her voice, “ There is no need for
that kind of language Mr. Black. I understand your concern and anger, but Poppy didn't mean he
was completely healthy, she just meant that there were no signs of attack. It's clear to see that your
brother must have done this to himself.”

Sirius nodded miserably, not saying anything. He was still looking at Regulus with wide eyes.
James hadn't seen Sirius this scared since he had run away from home. It sent an unpleasant chill
down his spine.

Professor Slughorn conjured two chairs beside Regulus’s bed and motioned for the boys to take a
seat. They both compiled stiffly. James looked at the young Slytherin in front of him. He knew that
Regulus wasn't exactly a good guy but he was a kid.

All his bad qualities were his parent's fault, not his own. James really hoped that Walpurga and
Orion Black would not be joining them. He didn't think that Sirius had thought about the
possibility of that yet, but it was all James could think of. If this sickness is serious enough then
their parents would inevitably be called and that would only end badly for Sirius.

James was considering mentioning this to Sirius when he noticed the two brothers. Sirius had
grabbed Regulus’s hand and was holding it tightly. James couldn't hide his shock, but he did notice
that Sluggy’s face was just as surprised by the action.

While McGonagall looked like she might have tears in her eyes looking at the scene. James
understood how she felt. It was definitely an odd sight, but it was heartwarming. Especially when
you knew what these two brothers had been through together.

Abusive parents, blood politics, and more than their fair share of arguments, and here they were
together even if it was just for the moment. James thought that it made both the boys look much
younger than their actual age.

Professor Slughorn walked over and placed a hand on James's shoulder, “It was very nice of you to
come to be with your friend, Mr. Potter.”
James nodded at the professor feeling out of place. Then professor Dumbledore broke his very out-
of-character silence, “Sirius, I know you aren't as close to your brother as you once were but have
you noticed anything out of place with your brother? Oddly, we know he's doing extraordinarily
well in classes so whatever is afflicting him must not be indolence.”

Sirius looked a little shocked at the question, probably for a lack of an answer. James knew that
Sirius probably hadn't noticed anything out of place with his brother, as he's taken specific care to
avoid the boy since their last interaction together.

He was opening his mouth to respond when the mediwitch cut in, “Actually headmaster I am
afraid it's the opposite.”

McGonagall focused her attention on Madam Pomfrey without missing a beat, “Have your tests
concluded Poppy? Do you know what's wrong with the boy?”

Madam Pomfrey nodded her head slowly looking slightly relieved to finally have answers, “Yes I
do.” Sirius sprung up eager for answers, “Before I read the full diagnosis, I want it to be clear that
the boy will be fine and will make a full recovery.”

James would have kissed the mediwitch for that. He thought it was very kind of her not to worry
Sirius more than was necessary. Sirius slumped back in his chair in obvious relief.

Dumbledore spoke next, breaking the relieved silence, “Thank you, Poppy. I am sure hearing that
is a relief to everyone.” He looked at Sirius when he said this, “ Would you mind telling us what
happened to cause our worry.”

She smiled sadly, “ Of course headmaster. While I am confident in the boy's recovery, I am
missing certain details in why this occurred. As far as I can see no illness caused this.”

“Then what did,” McGonagall broke in quickly. James admired the woman's restraint as he too
wanted to know with all his might.

“Regulus himself as far as I know.” Everyone looked at the boy shocked before she continued,
”Simply put, the boy is exhausted and malnourished.”

James heard a sharp intake of breath to his right and he turned to see Sirius’s wide frightened eyes.
McGonagall was the first to break the stunned silence that followed, “Exhausted? Malnourished?
My god, how is this possible?”

Slughorn, still looking stunned, stuttered out a response, “ I-I d-don't know Minerva. I had not
noticed any changes in the boy this year. If anything he seemed to have more energy with the work
he's been doing on his homework.”

“Yes, I had noticed his work was exemplary this year, “ McGonagall agreed, nodding.

Dumbledore cleared his throat slightly before speaking, “Perhaps that in itself was the problem.
Overworking himself during an OWL year.”

“But why has it come to this point? The OWLs are important but they are certainly not worth this
boy's health,” Professor McGonagall seemed particularly distressed about this diagnosis.

James once again took a moment to admire the woman that was Minerva McGonagall. She cared
about the students of Hogwarts like they were her own children. It didn't matter what house they
belonged to, their blood status, or their academic skill. She wanted to make sure everyone felt safe
and cared for at Hogwarts.

Sirius suddenly spoke, interrupting the professor's discussion, shocking them slightly, “It's obvious
why isn't it?” At their confused expressions, he continued, “My parents obviously pushed him to
this. They probably preached about his familial duty to elevate the family status.”

McGonagall gasped lightly, “Are you sure Sirius?”

“Of course. It's what they always told me. While I ignored them, Regulus never could.”

“Well if that is the reason-”

James was shocked to find himself cutting into the conversation, “It is the reason.”
Suddenly everyone's eyes were on him and he could feel his cheeks heating slightly when
Dumbledore spoke, “Do you have something you'd like to inform us of Mr. Potter?”

James could feel Sirius’s gaze burning into the side of his head, “ Uh yeah I guess. Well, I have
had a couple prefect rounds with Regulus and I have noticed a few things. He spends almost all his
time studying, doing prefect duties, or quidditch. I asked him one time why he felt he needed to do
all of that and he told me it was because he had to. That he had to save their family's reputation
after…” He trailed off, turning to look slightly at Sirius before continuing, “ After Sirius’
disownment. Which I told him was ridiculous and he got irrationally angry. Also, it's been pretty
obvious that he was struggling. Like he seems barely ever to be at mealtimes and when he is he
always brings a textbook. Not to mention Remus did find himself asleep with all his books in the
Owlery. Remus said he seemed really confused when he woke up, which is probably not a good
sign.”

Sirius snapped his head to attention when he heard Remus’s name. Remus had obviously not told
Sirius about his discussion with Regulus. James felt uncomfortable knowing he had revealed a
secret Remus had kept from Sirius in front of a bunch of other people.

Madam Pomfrey suddenly snapped back to the conversation, “ Oh that is not good. Confusion can
often be a sign of disorientation and lack of sleep. Mr. Potter, I wish you and Mr. Lupin would
have come to me with these symptoms earlier.”

James felt thoroughly chastised, “ I am sorry matron neither Remus nor me realized that these were
symptoms of a larger issue.”

“That is okay James. I would not expect you to know how to make a medical analysis at the drop
of that hat. I just wish this could've been avoided.”

“So Madam Pomfrey do you have all the information you need?” Dumbledore seemed to take the
information more in stride than the rest of the professors who looked slightly more disturbed.

“Yes, I certainly do. In fact, I think that it is time to take this discussion into my office for the
adults to handle. So we can figure out a solution.”

All the professors nodded and started heading to the door of her office.

James had to know whether Walpurga had been notified. The only thing worse than the Black
parents flooing to a room full of professors and their estranged son, was them flooing into a room
with their estranged son and his blood traitor best friend.

“Wait!” James shouted louder than was necessary.” Did you- did you notify his parents?”

Sirius made an odd sort of squeak as if that possibility had not occurred to him. Minnie cleared her
throat looking uncomfortable,” No Mr. Potter we did not.” She glanced at Sirius,” Before you boys
arrived we discovered some disturbing evidence of abuse and we would rather not involve our
prime suspects unless absolutely necessary.”

“What!” Sirius stood up outraged.

Madam Pomfrey stepped back to Regulus’ bed and she lifted up the bottom of the sheets to reveal
the young boy's legs. That's when James saw them. The scars. He heard a sharp take of breath and
realized that it was his own. Up the backs and sides of Regulus’s calves were small white scars
that were obviously from a type of spell, they were too precise not to be.

“Oh Merlin,” James heard himself whisper, still shocked. How could a parent possibly do this to
their own child? He looked to Sirius, expecting to see anger or shock, but Sirius didn't look
surprised at all.

“You don't seem surprised Mr. Black,” Slughorn shuffled closer to the bed.

Sirius stood up, surprising James, “I'm not surprised.”

He lifted up his own pant leg and then James saw matching scars on his own leg. Scars that James
had never noticed. He suddenly realized Sirius had been hiding his scars from James for five years.
James was further sickened by the idea of what those monsters had done to his best friend.

James heard the shocked sounds coming from around the room as Madam Pomfrey shuffled closer
to take a look at the similar marks. Then McGonagall spoke angrily,” Well that's that then Albus.
That has to be enough proof.”

“Excuse me. Proof?” Sirius asked quickly.

Albus Dumbledore gives a look of pity to Sirius before turning to McGonagall,” Unfortunately it is
not. The proof would have to be irrefutable to be enough to keep the boys away from two powerful,
wealthy purebloods.”

“Wait, are you kidding? You are trying to get Reggie away from them?”

To James and Sirius's surprise, Slughorn was the one who spoke next, “We’d like to. The things
going on in that house to children is heinous. I can't believe that a supposedly respected pureblood
house is full of so much hatred.”

James was shocked. Everyone knew that Horace Slughorn favored pureblooded students,
especially the sacred twenty-eight families. Hearing the old bastard abhorred by the actions of the
Black family was insane. It was also sort of nice to know that when push came to shove the
professor knew that student's safety was more important than connections.

“We would indeed like to help Regulus, but we just don't have enough evidence, unfortunately,”
Dumbledore spoke to the boys once more.

Sirius responded quickly, eager at the possibility of his brother escaping that house,” What if I
were to testify against them?”

Dumbledore smiled at Sirius sadly and spoke calmly, “As much as we may wish that the testimony
of a sixteen-year-old was valued to the Wizingamot. Unfortunately, they will put little stock into it.
Especially considering your father and uncle both hold a seat on the council.”

Sirius looked heartbroken at the thought and James felt that it would have been better off if they
hadn't mentioned it in front of him, better not to get his hopes up.

McGonagall looked sad once again at Sirius’s disappointment, “I am sorry Sirius. I really am.
Alright, let's go to Poppy's office and discuss what to do about Regulus.”

******************************************************************************

James and Sirius had been sitting with Regulus for at least two hours while the staff members were
strategizing in Madam Pomfrey's office. Sirius was back to holding his brother's hand,
They were distinctly not discussing the scars on both the Black brothers. James felt queasy about it.
All he could imagine was a nine-year-old Sirius and an eight-year-old Regulus being punished by
their mother, with her wand pointed at them and a cruel expression on her face. He could imagine
their pained tear-stained faces as well.

James couldn't understand why Sirius had not told him about the scars. About how deep the abuse
went in that house. He knew she had physically punished them but he had no idea that she had let
scars develop. He wondered if he had somehow made Sirius feel that he would judge him for the
scars. James knew at some point they were going to have to discuss it whether Sirius wanted to or
not.

Regulus woke to find Sirius grasping his hand and James sitting next to him with his arm around
Sirius, attempting to comfort him.

James watched as Regulus looked at his brother with obvious confusion clouding his eyes. Once
the grogginess started to dissipate from his face, he croaked out, “Sirius? What are you doing here?
What's going on?”

Sirius let out a forced pained laugh. James cringed at the sound of it. Regulus continued to look
around the hospital wing in confusion. His eyes fell on James and they widened until they moved
back to his brother.

Sirius didn't move his hand though he seemed like he might want to, “What do you think I'm doing
here? I'm here to be with you.” Regulus tilted his head in curiosity as Sirius continued, “You were
found passed out in a stairwell. You were probably sitting there for a few hours before someone
found you. It's been over three hours since you've been here.”

Regulus looked slightly dumbfounded, “Oh.”

“Oh? Are you kidding me, Reggie? Why have you not been sleeping or eating? You've lost weight
too, and you were already a stiff breeze away from falling over. You need to eat. Are you crazy?
You could get yourself killed this way. And for what? Them.”

As he spoke, James heard Sirius getting louder and angrier. He wasn't angry at Regulus so much as
he was angry at his parents for making Regulus this way. He was angry at his little brother for not
taking better care of himself. He was angry at himself for not being there for his brother. James
knew that he had always thought of Regulus as his responsibility when they were younger, and
James figured that when push came to shove he still did.
Regulus snapped right back at his brother, “What do you care? You're the one that left. You don't
care about me at all, so stop pretending to.”

James couldn't believe that Regulus had the nerve to say something like that to Sirius after he had
just watched him hold his brother's hand for hours.

Sirius flinched back at his brother's words, shocked at the absolute falsity of the statement, “Reg, I
know you're mad at me and you can be as mad at me as you want, but you cannot treat yourself
like this. You need to put your life above anyone else's, do you understand?”

James thought that was a little rich coming from Sirius who had never put his needs before others.
Sirius always put his life after Remus’s, James’s, and Peter's. While they were growing up James
knew that Sirius would always take the blame and punishment for his brother too. James knew that
Sirius could be a bit of a prat but he honestly couldn't think of another person in the world that he'd
want by his side.

James knew that he would never truly have the bond that Regulus had with Sirius but he was glad
that he got to be his best friend. He always thought of Sirius as his brother. He knew they weren't
blood-related and they hadn't grown up together as Sirius and Regulus had. They were best friends,
soulmates even, but James would never have a blood brother. It was an only child's wish. Sirius and
his brother might not like each other all the time, but he couldn't avoid caring for Regulus
anyways.

“That's rich coming from you, Sirius. You never did that growing up. You always put yourself in
front of me. You always took the punishment and it made me feel so guilty. Do you think I wanted
to watch her hurt you? Do you honestly think that? I'd much rather have taken the pain, the
physical pain, than the emotional abuse I felt when I had to watch you cry.”

“It was the same for me, you know. I never wanted to hear you in pain either. I thought that I was
sparing you from it, but I suppose emotional pain is sometimes worse than physical.” Sirius took a
deep breath before continuing, “I should warn you, they saw the scars and they know about mom
and dad.”

Regulus’s jaw dropped and he stared at Sirius unblinkingly, “Did you tell them? Siri, did you tell
them?”

Sirius grimaced, “No, they found them before I got here. I didn't know anything about them until
after they told me they wouldn't be calling mom and dad.” Regulus blew out a sigh of relief and
Sirius continued, “ I had to show them mine too, so that they didn't think you were being bullied or
something. Listen James told me about your schedule and about Remus finding you in the
Owlery.”

Regulus’s head snapped to James and James wanted to shiver at the icy glare he was given. Sirius
continued speaking before Regulus could speak, “I can tell you've lost at least two stone since the
school year started. It's unhealthy, Regulus. Do you think people can't see the bags under your
eyes? That your hair is starting to thin because of all the nutrients you skip when you miss meals? I
am not even sure how you manage not to fall off your broom during quidditch practice.”

Regulus snapped back at his brother indignantly, “My hair is not starting to thin, how dare you say
that. I manage just fine on the pitch, you are overreacting.”

“ Oh, I'm overreacting? My brother almost died in a stairwell by himself!”

“ I thought we weren't brothers. I thought I wasn't worth the scum on the bottom of your shoes. I
thought I wasn't even worth your time. Don't act like you care all of a sudden.”

“I care.”

James noticed Regulus’ glare was faltering as if it hurt just hearing Sirius say those words. His
eyes slid over to James. James noticed the exact instant Regulus went on the attack, “How dare you
tell them what I told you in private. How dare you lie to them and tell them that I have a problem.
I'm completely fine. All I am doing is just studying. There's nothing wrong with that.”

James couldn't believe what he was hearing,” There's plenty wrong with that, Regulus. You're
unhealthy. You act as if I told them something that they wouldn't have figured out on their own. It's
obvious to everyone.”

Regulus glared at him, opening his mouth to yell at James,when the professors finally came back
into the hospital.

Madam Pomfrey rushed over to Regulus’s bed, glad that he was awake, and immediately started
fussing over him. Dumbledore patted the boy on the head and told him that he was glad that he was
okay. McGonagall wouldn't stop staring at him with a small smile on her face. Slughorn stood
awkwardly to the side.
James wondered if this situation would change his opinion on anything. Now, Slughorn wasn't
exactly a blood purist. He didn't exactly discriminate against muggle-borns, but he often showed
his surprise at a gifted muggleborn students. Which James thought was ridiculous. After seeing
what a respected pureblood family had done to their two sons. James hoped that the Slytherin head
of house would understand that blood didn't equal perfection.

James listened as they laid down the plan for the rest of Regulus’s school year. He listened as they
chastised him for his foolishness. He listened as they gave him strict rules and regulations, which
James thought was very necessary. He listened as they asked Sirius for his permission as his
closest relative to implement the plan. He listened as Regulus vehemently disagreed and argued till
he was blue in the face.

He watched as Sirius relaxed about the situation and James had to admit he relaxed a bit too after
hearing the restrictions. Regulus Black would work himself into an early grave for his parents if
left unchecked.

James was glad that, even though it seemed that the Hogwarts staff wouldn't or couldn't remove
him from his parent's house, that they were still going to do something to help him while he was at
Hogwarts.

James hoped that with his head clear from studying and expectations that Regulus would thrive.
Regulus would have more time to find his own way rather than adopting his parent's beliefs.
 A Dogs Perspective

Sirius

Sirius was not having a good week. So far this week, Sirius’s brother was hospitalized, his best
friend saw scars that he was never supposed to see, and his girlfriend had struggled to meet his
eyes in the face of conflict. If that all didn't combine to make a terrible week, then the fact that
Sirius’s hair was flat, definitely not as voluptuous as it usually was, took the cake.

He didn't know if it was his bad week that caused his hair to flatten. Or if Peter had replaced his
shampoo again as a joke. Sirius really hoped that wasn't the case, as he would have thought Peter
would have learned his lesson from the last time he tried to prank Sirius.

Sirius knew that James wouldn't care about the scars, he wasn't under any impression that James
would ridicule him for them. Moony had scars and James never called them anything but cool, but
honestly, Sirius didn't want his scars to be called cool. They were ugly and they reminded him of
pain and everything bad.

He only showed them in the hospital wing because he wanted to make sure that the professors
knew that his parents had not only abused Regulus but him as well. That they were terrible people
and they didn't deserve to raise children. He even thought for a moment that it might make a
difference if he was willing to testify and show those scars to the whole Wizengamot. He should
have known that that was ridiculous. That of course, a bunch of stuffy old purebloods wouldn't give
a damn what a blood traitor’s mouth had to say. He had even forgotten that his father and uncle
were on the Wizengamot as well. Though he had to admit he would still testify if it meant saving
Regulus from that house. Sirius knew that he was out and that he had no reason to ever think about
that family again, but there was always Regulus.

While Regulus and himself were certainly not as close as they were as kids, and they certainly had
their differences, he couldn't help but feel like Regulus could be so much more than his parents'
puppet.

He knew that a lot of people probably didn't believe that, James included. He knew that James
probably thought that Sirius was ridiculous for going to that hospital wing that day. He knew that
James hated Sirius's family and probably hated Reggie too, but it still hurt. Sirius knew he was
partially to blame, he would always complain about Regulus. He would complain that he followed
their parents' rules religiously. He would complain that he had always had to take the punishment
for him, even though he now knew Regulus had never wanted that in the first place. He knew that
James probably hated his little brother, but he wished that he didn't.

If things were different, if Regulus could be saved, then maybe he could come and live with the
Potters, with James and Sirius. Maybe Regulus would finally be his brother again.

It was probably a ridiculous idea, but for a moment, before Albus Dumbledore smashed his dream,
he had thought it was a possibility. Then Dumbledore had told them that nobody would believe
him and that they didn't have enough evidence. Sirius thought that was an excuse to not do
anything. He didn't know why, but he didn't feel like Albus Dumbledore was doing his best to get
Regulus out of that house. It made him lose faith in the man and that made him feel a bit queasy, as
he was the man they were supposed to trust beyond anyone else.

Sirius still hasn't talked to Regulus since they had left the hospital wing. Regulus had been a bit
peeved that Sirius had allowed the professors to put such restrictions on him. That Sirius had even
encouraged them to be more strict. He knew that Regulus would probably be mad about it for a
while, but he couldn't help but not feel sorry. He couldn't feel sorry about his actions because they
would be the best thing for Regulus. The best thing for Regulus was to not do what his parents
wanted him to. The best thing for Regulus was to be able to live his life his own way as a 15-year-
old should. Sirius wanted more than anything for Regulus to join him, he just wasn't sure if it was
possible. He knew Regulus didn't want to talk to him right now, so he would bide his time until he
found his chance to discuss the future with Reg.

Right now, though, Regulus was busy glaring at him from across the Great Hall. Sirius knew that
Regulus had to be in the Great Hall a full half an hour, because of his new restrictions. He couldn't
help but smirk slightly at his brother, which caused his brother to flush with anger and turn away
dramatically. He laughed slightly at his baby brother until he heard someone clear their throat
across from him.

He turned to see Remus looking at him pointedly, “Stop teasing your brother Sirius.”

Sirius smirked at Remus now instead and in a teasing voice he said, “Why would I do that
Moony?”

Remus rolled his eyes and in a sarcastic voice said, “I don't know Sirius, maybe because Regulus
just got out of the hospital wing?”

Sirius rolled his eyes right back at Remus, matching his friend's tone, “I know that Moony, but look
at him now, he's fine. He's actually going to be a lot better off now. He's just annoyed with me
right now because I allowed Minnie and Dumbles to put restrictions on him. He'll get over it.”

“Yeah, I suppose you're right, but still don't taunt him too much, okay?”
Sirius laughed slightly and smiled at his friend, “Okay, how about I taunt you instead?”

Moony looked at him, obviously trying to gauge if that was a challenge, before deciding it was,
“Do you think you can handle the consequences of taunting me?”

Sirius met Remus’s stare, smirking, I don't know Moony. Do you think that I make promises that I
can't keep?”

Remus blushed slightly, which Sirius thought was extremely cute,” I hope not, Black.”

Sirius let out a loud laugh which caused James, who was deep in a conversation with Wormy, to
drag his attention to his two friends and ask, ”Finally gonna leave your brother alone, huh?”

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Come on, Jamie, you know I'd never leave the Slytherin’s alone.”

James rolled his eyes, “Now that I agree with you on, Pads. But maybe you should give your
brother a bit of space just too. Just until he's no longer throwing glares at your back every time he
sees you.”

Sirius looked at his best friend quizzically. It was comments like this that made Sirius wonder how
James felt about Regulus. He knew that Sirius cared about his brother, of course, and James as a
good friend would never go against that. Sirius wondered whether James wished he would leave
his brother alone forever. He shook that thought off. He knew that it did no good to dwell on
thoughts like that.

“Sure Prongs, I'll do that as soon as you leave Lily Evans alone.”

James looked at him indignantly and scoffed, “Excuse me. I'll have you know that I have not
bothered her all year.”

“Except for on the train after the prefect meeting, right?”James whipped his head back to Peter.
He looked at him quizzically, “How did you even know that?”

Peter blushed slightly and Remus threw his arm around his friend, tightly, “Oh come on Prongs,
you know that Peter always knows the best gossip.”

Peter blushed even deeper and said defensively, “It's not gossip. It's just what I heard.”

Sirius laughed, “Of course you heard it Wormtail. You were probably scuttling about trying to find
all the best information. Not that we don't love it, of course.”

James finally joined in on his friends' teasing, “After all, how else would I know who broke up
with who first, if it wasn't for you, Petey?”

This caused all the boys to kind of burst into laughter and Sirius thanked his lucky stars that he had
met the three boys on the train in his first year.

******************************************************************************************

At bedtime the day after Regulus got out of the hospital wing, it happened. The moment or
conversation that Sirius had been waiting for. He knew that it was inevitable so he was not in the
least bit surprised when James crawled into Sirius's bed at midnight. He closed the curtains and put
a silencing spell around the bed. When he was finished he sat cross-legged across from Sirius.

They used to do this all the time when they were younger, in their first and second year. They used
to talk for hours while their other roommates slept. They hadn't done it in quite a while, though,
lately, Sirius only ever had little talks like this with Remus.

Not because he didn't trust James. It was that James already knew everything important to him.
James already knew Sirius, better than he knew himself. So when he was talking to Remus he was
getting a different opinion than he would normally get with James, and sometimes that helped
him.

As soon as James crawled through the curtains Sirius knew what they'd be talking about. Sirius had
been waiting for it all day. He knew that James wouldn't be able to wait very long before he had to
talk to him about the scars. Sirius understood why James was hurt and concerned for his friend. He
was hurt because Sirius hadn't shared the more grotesque punishments that his mother gave him
and he hadn't shared something that would be with him for the rest of his life.
He knew he should have told James. He knew that James wouldn't care. He knew James loved him
no matter what but they were disgusting. He hated the look of them. He hated thinking about what
they meant and he didn't want to bring James into that. James, who was everything light and
everything good. James, who had never had to worry about being abused or mistreated his entire
life. He wouldn't exactly understand, but he would try to.

Sirius knew that was the important part, but he hadn't wanted to involve him. He didn't want James
to pity him more than he already did. He knew James pitied him because of his family, but he
didn't want him to pity him because of scars that would be on him for the rest of his life. He'd
considered not showing the scars in the hospital, because of the look that appeared on James's face
when he saw Regulus matching scars.

He was shocked and disgusted. Probably not with Regulus, but with the people who raised him and
Sirius both. Who knew what James Potter was thinking? The boy had lived a charmed life. He
didn't understand what it was like to be scared every time you were in your childhood home.

That's why sometimes he chose to talk to Moony about his more deep and dark secrets. Moony
knew about the scars, he had known since his first year. Sirius had seen Moony’s scars and he
thought he should repay the favor. He had wanted Remus to know that while Remus’s scars
showed bravery and strength, Sirius’s were the result of abuse. He wanted to make sure Remus
never felt ashamed of his scars, not in the way Sirius did.

James had inferred a lot about his best friend's childhood and a lot about the House of Black as a
whole. James knew that Walpurga and Orion were vicious and often treated Sirius and Regulus like
human garbage. He didn't know their exact methods. He didn't know they pressured him and his
brother into everything they did. He didn't know the cruel spells his mother knew. He didn't know
about the painful dark artifacts that his Father had. He didn't want James to look at him like he was
an abused child. He was no longer a child and he was no longer under their care. He had no reason
to feel shame, but he still did.

Once James mumbled a silencing spell he looked at Sirius for a long moment before speaking,
“Sirius, I think we need to talk.”

Sirius nodded, “About the scars.”

James shook his head, “Not about the scars, exactly. You know, I don't care about the scars. I
loved you before I saw them and I love you now, but why didn't you tell me?”

Sirius felt stupid. He should have known James would be more upset about not being told than the
actual scars themselves, “I don't know. I was really ashamed of them. I still am, but especially
when I was younger. I didn't want you to see him. I didn't want anyone to see them, but as I got to
know you better, I knew you wouldn't care. After we'd been friends for years and you hadn't seen
them, I knew I couldn't just pull you aside and show you. And tell you my whole pathetic life
story-”

James interrupted, “Yes, you could have. You can tell me anything about your life anytime you
want. I'm always here to listen to you, Sirius. Not to sound sappy, but you're my soulmate, man. I
love you.”

Sirius chuckled lightly, “Soulmate? Come on, James. I thought that was Lily Evans.”

James rolled his eyes, “No, she might be the love of my life, but she's certainly not you, Sirius.”

Sirius smiled at the thought and he couldn't help but agree with his friend. James Potter was with
no doubt in his mind his partner in life. James continued, “And I guess that's why it hurts so bad
because I do think of you as the most important person in my life, and the fact that I did not know
such a big secret about you makes me feel like you don't trust me like you don't feel the same.”

Sirius was shaking his head before James even finished, “No James, that's not it. I trust you with
my life, I just..you've had such a great life. You have such great parents. I don't want to bring you
any further into my shithole of a life. I've brought you in enough by staying with your parents, but I
don't want you to have to know every terrible thing my parents have done. You don't need that
weighing on you. I certainly won't make you.”

James put his hand on Sirius's shoulder, “ Sirius, you can tell me anything, anytime you want. I
want to know everything about you. I wanna make sure I know what's going on with you at all
times. I don't care if it does bum me out. The fact that I know more about you will always be more
important than that, okay?”

Sirius nodded and smiled at his friend, “Okay.”

James smiled slightly back at him, “Alright, you don't need to tell me everything now, but I expect
you to start telling me things, not withholding the truth because you think I can't handle it, Sirius.”

Sirius cracked a smile as well, “Of course, Jamie. I'll tell you all the dirty details of my life.”

James laughed at Sirius as he waggled his eyebrows flirtatiously, “Please, please do not tell me
about what you and Marlene get up to. I respect her too much to hear that shit.”

Sirius's face flashed with something, he was sure James saw it. He couldn't help at the thought of
his girlfriend, who he wasn't too happy with at the moment. James noticed, ”What's wrong?”

Sirius figured that James would have an idea of what was going on, “Well, I'm not too happy with
Marlene if I'm honest. I mean, my brother was in the hospital and she couldn't even tell me to my
face. She knew it, it was obvious, but she made Lily tell me. Tell me why somebody who
supposedly cares about me would do that.”

“Yeah, I have to admit that I thought the same thing when that was going on. I got distracted pretty
quickly, but I noticed it at the moment. I think Marlene felt uncomfortable, I don't think she does
great with emotional conflict like that and I don't think she wanted to be involved in it.”

Sirius heard himself raising his voice a little bit now, “But James, why the hell would she feel that
her awkwardness with emotional conflict was more important than me knowing about my brother.
And more than that, learning about it from my girlfriend instead of a girl that I hardly even talk to.”

James interrupted Sirius, “You talked to Lily. You like Lily.”

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Yes, I like Lily, but we're not exactly best friends. We're not exactly as close
as Marlene and I, so tell me why would my girlfriend refuse to share something important like that
with me and let Lily do it instead.”

“I'm not sure, I really don't know, but I wish I did. I'm sorry, Sirius.”

“It's fine, James. I think I'm just going to have to have a talk with Marlene. I'm not sure how it's
going to go.”

James nodded, understandingly, then he proceeded to attempt to break the ice by telling a joke
about a muggle that went to a bar. It was an absolutely atrocious joke, but it did change the subject
and Sirius appreciated the distraction from the unpleasant conversation he was bound to have
tomorrow with Marlene.

******************************************************************************************

The Marauders were enjoying a pleasant evening in the common room. The fire was roaring next
to them and the other Gryffindors chatter was surrounding them. Pete was in the middle of telling
them a story about a certain 4th year Hufflepuff who supposedly hooked up with a 6th year
Ravenclaw in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.

Remus was currently debating whether logically, they should believe this, gossip or not. James and
Sirius were trying their best to guess the names of the two students. Peter was being surprisingly
stingy about this part of the information. Which only strengthened Remus’s argument.

Sirius shouted, “Was it, Marina Thompson?”

Peter shook his head.

“Delilah Rose!”James called.

“No, Marnie Scott?”

“No, it wouldn't be Marnie Scott. She's dating that, uh, she's dating….”

Peter cut in on James thinking, “A Slytherin 5th year.”

James nodded, “Oh right, the snake. I don't know what she sees in him.”

Sirius voiced his agreement, “Yeah she's way too good looking to be hanging out in the pits.”

Remus rolled his eyes at that, “Not all Slytherins are bad Sirius.”

James scoffed, “Says you, name one Slytherin that doesn't make you want to stab your own eyes
out.”

Remus laughed, “Well, I don't hate Regulus.”

Sirius nodded, “As surprising as that information is, that's true. Regulus is about the only Slytherin
that doesn't always make me want to stab my own eyes out, but occasionally he does.”

James laughed loudly and then his eyes widened in realization, “Oh, you know I bet it was Tansy
Marksmith and Arnold Getler.”

The boys looked at Peter for confirmation and by the slight smile on his face, they guessed James
was correct. Sirius called out, “Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner and Mr. Potter takes the prize.
What will be your reward, Sir?”

“Oh my, this is such a surprise. Well, I guess I would really just like World Peace for all.”

Peter began laughing to the point of wheezing and Remus just chuckled lightly. Sirius patted his
friend on the back feeling, for the moment, distracted from his own head, that is until he saw
Marlene McKinnon, his girlfriend, walk-in with Lily Evans and Mary McDonald.

They walked in and sat at a corner table, not even glancing at the Marauders. Sirius figured James
was probably miffed about this as Lily was the apple of his eye. Surprisingly, James didn't seem to
care whether she was looking at him or not. Odd. Sirius quickly dropped that line of thought as his
eye caught Marlene. He couldn't believe it. They had been together for long enough now that at the
very least she shouldn't be ignoring him when she walks into a room.

They had hardly spoken a word to each other since the incident in the Great Hall that day. Sirius
really didn't think he should be the one to reach out first considering he hadn't done anything
wrong and yet, Marlene didn't seem to be in any hurry to reach out either. It made him question
whether they really even cared about each other that much. He thought he cared about her.

She was great. She was beautiful, smart, and fun. He loved all of that about her, but he didn't think
he necessarily loved her. He loved spending time with her, but he just couldn't believe how easy it
was for them to not be in each other's life these last couple of days. He wondered whether it was
even worth it for them to be in a relationship.

He hated thinking about that, but he had to admit he had been thinking about it for a while, even
before the incident in the Great Hall, but he was thinking about it more and more lately. They
always seem to be getting into some random spat or another, never anything that serious but it was
always something. It seemed like they just couldn't make it work for longer than a couple days.

He knew that sometimes his friends got annoyed with him and Marlene's arguments, especially
Remus. Remus seemed to always be annoyed with Sirius lately, especially when he was talking
about his girl issues. The last time Remus and he had one of their talks after dark, Sirius had tried to
bring up Marlene, Remus had changed the subject very quickly. Which made Sirius feel kind of
ridiculous. He knew that Remus had so much more to deal with than petty girl problems, but he
still wanted somebody to talk with.

James was always a good option, but ever since James started his prefect meetings and became
captain of the quidditch team, it seemed like he was always busy. Way too busy to hear about
Sirius’s issues with his girlfriend every time they popped up because he had to admit they popped
up a lot. Peter was always a choice too, but Sirius was always wary of telling Peter information he
didn't tell all the Marauders, because, while he loved Peter, he was the biggest gossip in Hogwarts.
Even though he trusted that Peter wouldn't spread his secrets, he still was weary of it for some
reason. Since Sirius had no one to vent to about his problems, Marlene got a good portion of his
anger and he got her portion right back.

Sirius glanced at James. He hadn't told the other Marauders that he was going to talk to Marlene
tonight. James seemed to have noticed his lack of action in the conversation now and raised his
eyebrow at Sirius as if asking, what are you gonna do? Sirius knew what he was going to do, he
was gonna make sure Marlene gave him some answers.

He nodded his head towards the girls and James nodded back at him knowing exactly what was
going on. James gave him a smile that told him that he wished him luck. Which Sirius thought was
nice, even though he didn't really know if luck had much to do with tonight. He always found it
funny that he and James could communicate through expressions and motions rather than words. It
was something that Sirius had never had with Regulus.

Sirius got up and walked towards the girl’s table. Marlene didn't turn around as he walked up, but
Mary saw him first, “Hey Sirius!”

Marlene jumped slightly and looked back at him with an odd expression on her face. Lily sent him
a small smile, but her eyes showed slight concern as she glanced at Marlene quickly. So obviously
Marlene had talked to somebody about this situation, and of course, it wasn't Sirius. Sirius wasn't in
the mood to make small talk with any of the girls right now, “Marlene, can I talk to you for a
minute?”

She looked at him with blank emotionless eyes, “Yeah, Sirius sure.”

With that, he walked away expecting her to follow him up to his dorm room. He couldn't find it in
himself to be very polite until he knew what her excuse was. When they finally made it up to the
room in awkward silence, she smirked at him slightly and broke the silence, “Not bringing me up
here to have your wicked way with me, are you?”
He didn't laugh at her joke, just closed the door behind her and turned to her. He crossed his arms
and glared at her, “Why?”

She stuttered out in a very non-Marlene way, “Why what?”

He rolled his eyes, getting angrier at her feigning ignorance, “Why would you do that to me?”

“And what exactly did I do to you, Sirius?”

“Hmmm… What did you do to me? Huh, let me think about it. Maybe the fact that you let me sit
in a Great Hall full of students. All staring and pointing at me and let me be clueless about the
entire situation. And when I asked you, you couldn't even look me in the eye and tell me the truth.
You made your friend tell me. Do you know how that felt? Do you know how ridiculous I felt?
Having to hear about my brother from somebody I'm not even close to while my girlfriend sits
there staring at her soup.”

“I am so sorry Sirius. I didn't know what to say to you because I never know how you're going to
react when it comes to your brother. Half the time you hate him and you hate what he's about and
you hate that he's your parent's puppet and you bitch about him constantly. The other half of the
time you're staring at him hoping he's okay, you're worried for him, and you're wondering what
he's doing. How am I supposed to know what you're feeling and when you're feeling it? I'm not a
damn mind reader, Sirius.”

“Marlene, how long have we been together?”

“How is that relevant?”

“How long?”

“We've been together since the last week of school last term.”

“Exactly quite a while. We should know each other pretty well considering we were friends before
that and you're telling me that you don't know how I feel about my brother?”
“Sirius, nobody knows how you feel about your brother!”

“Yes, they do, Marlene. My brother… is not a good guy. He is my parents' puppet and sometimes I
do hate him. But he's my brother, he's my baby brother and I've told you about some of the times
we had when we were younger. Obviously, I would care to know that he was in the hospital. Even
if I hated him, I would still care to know he was in the hospital and you're telling me you don't
know that. Maybe you don't know me at all.”

They were in a total screaming match with each other and Sirius really hoped that they couldn't be
heard in the common room. He was just so mad at her. How could she not know that he cared
about his brother? Had she really never noticed that he constantly snuck glances at his brother and
that he never let someone other than himself say anything bad about his brother.

“Maybe I don't know you, Sirius. I don't know. I always thought that I knew you pretty well but
once we actually got together, things weren't how I'd thought they'd be. Even given that I thought
we were doing fine and then something actually important comes up and I can't even find the
words to tell you about it. It's not just this, you know? We fight all the time.”

“I know we do.”

“Why is that? Other couples make it work, why can't we?”

“I don't know, maybe there's something wrong with us.”

Their conversation had gotten a lot less volatile very quickly. Instead of arguing, for once, it
seemed like they were actually trying to have a discussion about their future. Neither Sirius nor
Marlene were very serious people, no pun intended. They both preferred levity and laughs to
anything that could disrupt their mood. This conversation felt extremely out of character and heavy
for them to be having, but Sirius knew they had to have it.

“I don't think there's something wrong with us, Sirius. Maybe we're just not meant to be together.”

“Are you saying you want to break up?”

“No, I don't want to break up, because I like you, Sirius. I genuinely care about you. I think you're
a great guy. You're such a catch and I honestly can't think of another man I would rather be in a
relationship with.”

“I'm the same, you know. You're the only girl I've ever dated that I've actually cared about beyond
a quick fuck if I'm honest. It's not that I don't like the girls, it's just nothing ever felt right with other
girls. I don't know. I don't want to end this if nothing is ever gonna feel right again.”

“Sirius, we're sixteen. We have so much life to live. You think you're not gonna find anybody else
that you enjoy spending time with more than somebody you knew when you were sixteen. I mean,
I'm scared too. I don't know how it's going to be, especially with the war, but I think we owe it to
each other to see what's out there, don't you? Because maybe it's something really great and maybe
it's even better than what we have.”

“Maybe you are right. Maybe it is for the best.”

“Sirius, I'm sorry for not telling you about your brother. Not just because I am or I guess I was your
girlfriend.” Sirius flinched slightly but he wasn't sure why, “I guess that It's more because you're
my closest guy friend, don't tell James. I care about you so much. I want you to be happy and I
think I was just kidding myself when I said I didn't know how you felt about Regulus. I mean, you
do change your mind a lot, but I should have thought about it more. I should have known that
you're always gonna have someplace in your heart for your baby brother.”

“That's okay, Marlene. I'm sorry for freaking out at you, it's not your fault. It's my fault for not
having his back.” She looked like she was about to comment on that so he continued quickly,” I
don't wanna talk about that anymore. By your last sentence, I can tell you've made a decision.”

“Yes, I have made a decision and I think you've made the decision to.”

“Yeah, I think that I knew before I even came up here that this would end.”

“Me too, I think it's why I've been avoiding you the last few days.”

“Yeah, you're a great girl Marls and I still want to be friends.”

“Sirius, we are friends. We will always be friends, okay?”

They gave each other a hug, an awkward one but a hug nonetheless. Then they both went
downstairs to their respective friends.

Sirius felt odd. He never had a breakup that was amicable before. They both had just decided to see
what else was out there. He couldn't bring himself to be upset about the idea. He liked Marls, but
he thought maybe there was something else out there for him.

He went and sat with his friends and immediately James’s eyes were on him. Peter and Remus,
who were having a discussion before he came down turned to him to see where he'd been.

James had obviously not told them what was going on, so he knew he'd have to say it,” So we did
it, Marlene and I just broke up.”

Peter gasped loudly and dramatically. It would have been comical if Sirius wasn't feeling all sorts
of weird right now. James immediately put his arm around Sirius, comforting him. While Sirius
thought it was a nice gesture, he didn't necessarily think he needed the comfort. The breakup hadn't
ended heartbreakingly at all. He still had a great friend and now he would search for somebody
who would be a great love for him.

Remus was silent. Sirius made eye contact with him and saw the perplexed expression on Remus’s
face. That was before James had asked him how it happened and Sirius had to go into the full
details for his friends.

Later when he was about to go to bed after getting ready. He saw Remus wave him over. The other
two boys were already in bed, so Sirius climbed through Remus’s curtains and sat on the bed with
him. Remus murmured a silencing spell so Sirius knew he would not be done talking about the
breakup for the night. Strangely, he didn't mind. Sirius never minded talking to Remus. It was so
easy.

“Are you okay?”Remus seemed worried about him for some reason.

“Yeah, I'm actually completely fine.”

Remus nodded, “So you're not heartbroken and you don't need a hug or anything?”
Sirius smiled at him,” Well, I wouldn't mind a hug, but really I am okay. Marlene and I are still
going to be friends. I guess we both just needed to, you know, look for somebody who makes us
feel something more.”

Remus had an odd expression on his face as he nodded, “Come in here then”

Sirius chuckled lightly as Remus pulled him into a hug. It wasn't something they did too often, but
Sirius had to admit it was comforting at the moment.

Remus was so warm and his arms were so long he wrapped Sirius all the way up in a way that
made him feel safe. Remus made him feel safe and comfortable. He even enjoyed being wrapped
in Remus’s scent. He smelled like ink bottles and parchment. It made Sirius feel complete for some
reason.

When they pulled back, there was a bit of an awkward silence that confused Sirius. They were
friends for Merlin's sake and had been for a long time. Something felt different for some reason
between them, but as Remus launched into a discussion about the proper way to treat a breakup he
found himself forgetting the weird tension between them. As long as he was with his friends he
would always be happy. Especially when he had his Moony.
 Bets and Bad Friends

Regulus

When they told him, Regulus couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe that he was actually being
treated like a naughty child. They were restricting the amount of studying he could do, and they
were giving him a minimum amount of time he had to spend in the Great Hall at every meal. Plus
they were limiting the amount of homework Regulus could be given, so he wasn't tempted to fall
back into old habits.

He couldn't believe that the professors were reacting so intensely to a simple case of a tired student.
It honestly wasn't a big deal, but everyone was treating it like it was: the professors, Sirius, James,
and Regulus’s friends. He was still cross at Sirius for agreeing to the crazy plans the professors had
put in place for Regulus. Sirius was not his parent, he certainly shouldn't be in charge of Regulus’s
study habits.

He wasn't even sure what had happened. He remembered feeling dizzy and sitting down. And then
he must have passed out, but he didn't particularly remember it.

He just remembered waking up to Sirius clutching his hand. Which was odd considering that he
hadn't talked to Sirius since his brother had tried to choke him in the hall. It was odd seeing Sirius
worried about him, but not exactly unwelcome.

While he and Sirius had gotten into an argument almost immediately upon Regulus waking up. He
still was sort of glad that his brother was there. He couldn't believe that he had passed out due to
exhaustion.

How weak do you have to be to pass out due to exhaustion? He hoped nobody told his mother and
father or he would never hear the end of it. Black’s aren't weak.

He soon realized he had a bigger problem than his parents finding out about the incident when
Sirius told him that the teachers had found the scars on the back of his legs. Which in turn led to
Sirius having shown them his scars, proving to everyone that they were from their parents.

Regulus was livid when he’d heard that Sirius had done that. He couldn't believe that Sirius had
betrayed him, betrayed the family. Well, he knew that Sirius had already betrayed the family, but
this was even worse.
Did he even know what this meant? Did he even understand what he had done? Sirius had just
confirmed to the people who wanted to take down their parents and other families like theirs more
than anything, that they were abusive. Even though they were not, Walpurga and Orion hadn't
abused them, they only punished the boys when they needed it.

What Sirius had done wasn't going to help either of them at all. It was just going to cause an issue
that would make mother and father very angry. Besides, it wasn't like they didn't deserve the
marks. They only got them when they were particularly naughty when they were kids.

These days they, or more accurately just Regulus, receive punishments in the form of curses that
were internal, rather than external. You couldn't see the scars from the punishments anymore.
Regulus preferred the scars to the new punishments.

He remembered listening to Sirius lecture him about taking care of himself while the professors
were deciding his fate in Madam Pomfrey's office

Regulus hadn't realized that James Potter was there until he had already had a full argument with
Sirius. He was shocked to see James there.

The last time he had seen James was during the night that they spent half their rounds in the broom
cupboard. The last time he had seen him, James had made the proposition for the two of them to
sneak around with each other in secret. Regulus was supposed to get back to him, but he hadn't
managed to do it yet.

Once he had seen Potter in the hospital wing he knew that there was no way that he could agree to
the proposition. Even if he might have wanted to. How could he possibly kiss a man that had seen
him lying unconscious in the hospital wing with his older brother clutching his hand?

He probably thought Regulus was pathetic. He probably regretted that he had ever kissed Regulus
in the first place.

When Regulus told his friends about his new restrictions, Evan had laughed loudly while Barty
had shown slightly more concern. He had asked questions about what had happened and how
Regulus was feeling. Although it sort of embarrassed Regulus, he appreciated the concern.

Evan had seemed more concerned with the fact that Regulus wouldn't be able to help him with the
majority of his homework anymore. His studying hours would now be scheduled for him and he
would need all of that time for his homework.

Regulus’s new rules were intense. Regulus was only allowed two hours to do his homework and to
study for his OWLs a day. Now, this might not have been enough time for all of his homework, so
the teachers were having him skip some of the more stressful assignments.

As if he didn't feel pathetic enough. They weren't even going to let him do all the assignments his
classmates did. He was also required to spend at least 30 minutes in the Great Hall during
breakfast, lunch, and dinner. In which he wasn't allowed to bring any studying material with him.

All team quidditch practices had also been restricted, they had been reduced to two hours instead of
three hours a day. Mulciber was pissed about this but somehow he hadn't linked it to Regulus's
hospital visit.

Instead, Mulciber blamed Potter for the reduced practice times, which Regulus thought was a little
ridiculous considering James Potter practiced more quidditch than anyone else in the school as if
he’d want his own quidditch practices reduced just to spite Slytherin.

Regulus wondered if James was cursing Regulus’s name for messing up his quidditch practices.
Regulus hoped that he wasn't, but he wouldn't be surprised if James was. After all, if Regulus
hadn't been so weak then he would still have all the time in the world to practice.

Regulus was also only allowed to do two prefect rounds a month. His first round was now
scheduled with the one and only James Potter, permanently on the fifth of each month. While his
second round was scheduled with the head girl on the twenty-first of each month. Regulus guessed
that the professors figured that James and the head girl, for some reason Regulus could never
remember her name, would keep an eye on him during his rounds and report back to them with
problems.

He didn't mind the cutback of the prefect duties, the less prefect stuff he had to do, the better. Then
again, what was he going to do with all his free time now?

Regulus remembered back to the hospital wing, right after the professors had told them of the new
restrictions. Sirius had asked Dumbledore how they were going to enforce the rules and make sure
Regulus wasn't overworking himself. Regulus remembered being indignant at Sirius’s words,
because really why would Sirius warn them that there was a hole in their plans?
Dumbledore had laughed heartily as if it was ridiculous that they wouldn't be able to enforce it. He
had said that there were eyes everywhere: paintings, prefects, and ghosts, they would know if
Regulus broke the rules. Then he continued about Regulus needing to come to them if he felt at all
stressed. Then they told Sirius and James to keep an eye on Regulus as well. Ridiculous. Regulus
did not need his big brother and his friend watching over him.

He was shaken out of his thoughts by Evan, “Hey Regs, what time is your study session again? I
need help with this potions essay.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at Evan, “It's at six, but I am not allowed to do that essay. It could stress
me out or something. ” He said this in a way that was a cross between sarcastic and bitter.

He hated feeling like an invalid and that was the way all of the professors were making him feel
these days. So far just this week he wasn't allowed to do a transfiguration report, a potions essay,
and an astronomy star chart. The last one particularly pissed him. His entire family was named
after the stars, he could do that assignment in his sleep, yet they still wouldn't let him do it.

Evan pouted as if it was Regulus’s fault that he wasn't allowed to do certain homework. Evan
continued to be annoying, “What, come on Regs that's bullshit! They can't control your life, can
they? I mean it's against the statue of magical beings.”

Barty rolled his eyes, cutting into the conversation, “Actually it's not. While at Hogwarts Regulus
is technically a ward of the school, meaning that they can make any choices for him if they deem it
important for his safety.”

Regulus noticed that Barty’s tone was distinctly bored as if Evan was exhausting to even speak to.
Regulus knew the feeling, he liked Evan but sometimes the guy just didn't understand anything.

Evan seemed insulted that Barty had disagreed with him, “Oh that's right, of course, you'd know
that, with daddy being an ass-kissing, muggle loving, social climber of a ministry employee. ”

Regulus could not believe that Evan had just said that. What was he thinking? Evan was bigger and
stronger than Barty but Barty knew some wicked curses. Plus he could be absolutely cruel if he
was pissed off.

Regulus watched for Barty's reaction, just waiting for the bloodshed to begin. Barty wasn't a fan of
his father but it was obvious that Evan's words were meant to attack Barty rather than his father.
To his surprise Barty raised his eyebrows, still looking bored, but didn't move a muscle, “Truer
words have never been spoken, but if you say them to me again I hex you into next week,
understand.”

Evan looked slightly surprised at the threat as if he hadn't been expecting it. Evan was an idiot
sometimes. Regulus could see that threat coming a mile away.

“Didn't mean any offense to you Crouch, my bad,” He raised his hands and spoke as if he was
trying to show Barty that he was harmless.

Regulus rolled his eyes at the little display, Rosier was hardly harmless. Crouch muttered back,
“Yeah I'm sure you didn't.”

Evan looked as if he didn't know what to say, so he muttered something about grabbing his books
then quickly ran down the stairs of the common room that led to their dorm rooms.

Regulus took this moment and looked to Barty, “What the hell was that little display?”

Barty looked over at him and cocked up one eyebrow up at Regulus, “That display has been going
on all year. It's much worse than it was before, he’s been challenging me as if he's trying to prove
something.”

Regulus was confused, he hadn't noticed anything different with Rosier, “I haven't noticed
anything. What do you mean, he's trying to prove something?”

Barty sighed and leaned forward in his chair giving Regulus his full attention, “You haven't
noticed, because you've been working yourself to the bone. You've been too preoccupied to be
present during his little moods. Speaking of which he’s pissed that you aren't doing his homework
for him anymore, he's been saying that you think you are too good for us now.” He rolled his eyes
as he continued, “I can't be certain but I think he is trying to prove to Mulciber and his crew that he
is like them and that he hates blood traitors and mudbloods alike.”

Regulus had to stop himself from flinching at the word mudblood. It's not as if he didn't hear all
the time at home and from other Slytherins, but he had never heard Barty say it.
He moved past it knowing that it shouldn't shock him as much as it did, “So why is he picking a
fight with you then? You are a pureblood and you're certainly not a blood traitor.”

Barty nodded, “Yes, he knows that but all Mulciber knows about me is that my father is a
muggleborn supporter. He thinks that by picking a fight with me they will notice that he doesn't
like my father either. Ridiculous I know, but that's our Evan. ”

Regulus felt put out by this information. He always wondered if Rosier would go off the deep end,
he always toed the line anyways. He just hadn't expected it to happen so soon and for him to try to
use Barty to get what he wanted. Then again he is a Slytherin.

Barty spoke again, correctly assuming that Regulus needed to process that information, “It's not a
bad plan if you think about it. Maybe he's more intelligent than I thought.”

Regulus was even more confused now, “What do you mean it's not a bad plan? Plan for what?”

Barty looked at him and spoke slowly,” It's not a bad plan for getting in with the Dark Lord.” At
Regulus’s widened eyes, he continued, “Come on Regulus, you knew there was a war coming
right?”

Regulus shook his head feeling numb,” A war? I mean I knew he was gaining power and that
people would be joining in his ranks but I never imagined a war.”

Barty stared at Regulus for a moment before speaking, “Regulus I would have thought you’d know
better than anyone. Your parents and cousin are part of his ranks already and from what I hear that
the plan is for you to join him as well. The time is coming where you have to align yourself one
way or another. Rosier is just trying to make sure everyone knows what side he's on.”

Regulus gaped at him. He didn't know what to say, luckily he didn't have to respond when Evan
joined them once again.

Regulus didn't snap back to attention until he heard his name, ”Come on Regs, just help me write
this paper. Nobody is going to find out you went out of your study session time. ”

Regulus was about to respond that he would help when Barty snapped suddenly, “No. Regulus
don't help him. He can figure out the paper on his own. And you Rosier, you should know better
than to ask him. For Merlin's sake the last time he over-studied he passed out. Do not ask him to
break the rules because you're too lazy to write your own paper. ”

Regulus was too shocked to hear Evans reply, though he did hear an argument break out.

He was shocked that Barty and Rosier were fighting. He was shocked that Barty wouldn't let him
break the rules when he'd never cared about rules before.

He was the most shocked that everyone apparently knew what his parents were getting up to and
that they had plans for Regulus as well.

He felt exposed suddenly as if everyone in Slytherin robes could see into his mind. They could see
exactly how he felt about serving the dark lord.

He hoped that wasn't true, or he'd be dead before the year was out.

******************************************************************************

James

James hadn't heard from Regulus in over a week. He knew that Regulus wasn't exactly happy with
Sirius or him, for encouraging the professors to put more restrictions on Regulus. James couldn't
find it in himself to feel guilty about his part in that.

Regulus had been going down an extremely dangerous path and while James knew that the school
couldn't do much when Regulus wasn't at Hogwarts, he needed to have some moments of
recompense from his home life. Still, James wished he could make sure Regulus’s mental health
was improving the way it should be. He knew that Sirius had been wondering about it too.

That day in the hospital wing was the first time in years Sirius had held Regulus’s hand. For the
first time in years, they had any kind of sibling bond on display to the world. I mean even the
professors had not expected it, otherwise, they would have let Sirius know about his brother's
condition as soon as they found him.

James had hoped maybe this would have brought the two brothers closer together, but he feared it
might have pushed Regulus farther away. Sirius wanted to keep an eye on his brother but Regulus
was determined not to get near his brother. Probably because he knew Sirius, more than ever
before, wanted to get Regulus out of that house. James agreed wholeheartedly. He wasn't all of a
sudden a big Regulus Black fan, besides his looks obviously, but he hated the idea of anyone being
stuck in that house of horrors.

James wondered if he could somehow convince the boy to choose his path, during one of their
encounters. Providing of course that Regulus wanted to have more encounters as they had before.
He knew that the boy had enjoyed it but he also knew that Regulus was extremely stubborn and
would never admit that. James still hadn't heard Regulus’s answer on the proposal he made after
their last prefect rounds.

James knew that if he had the chance, that he was going to get that answer as soon as possible.
Even more than that he was going to help Regulus Black in whatever way he could. Not only for
Regulus himself but for Sirius and the brother he remembers.

It was the day before the Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff quidditch match when James finally had an
opportunity to get his answer.

He had one of his few moments alone of the day. Usually, he was accompanied by at least one of
the marauders or sometimes a member of the quidditch team, but today he was surprisingly alone.

He was walking up from Care of Magical Creatures which he usually had with Peter, but he
happened to be playing hooky to finish a paper for Transfigurations that was due later this
afternoon. So he was all alone on his trek back up to the school.

James just makes it up to the entrance of the school when he runs into a group of fourth-year
students heading down to the grounds for their Care of Magical Creatures class. The group of
students included three Slytherin students, one of them being extremely handsome the other being
total toads.

“Potter, what a surprise! Where’s the rest of your posse?” Evan Rosier taunts viciously as the
group of three stops in front of James.

The other students passing by glance curiously at the exchange. Regulus Black is flanked by
Rosier and Barty Crouch, unsurprisingly. James honestly didn’t know what Reg could see in those
two as friends, I mean they are total dollopheads.

“Oh, ya know just getting our victory party ready for tomorrow night. Oh, that’s right, that will put
you in third place for the cup won’t it?”
James couldn’t help gloating about Gryffindor’s chances in the game the next day. He knew they
were gonna win and he knew that the last thing the Slytherins wanted was them to win. He smirked
right at Regulus, knowing that he was the only one of the three on the quidditch team.

He saw the anger cross both Crouch’s and Rosier’s faces, while Reg just smirked back at James.
James' stomach fluttered at the sight of cockiness on his face. If there was one thing James liked, it
was self-assurance. He loved seeing an attractive person who knew their worth.

“Wow, it’s gonna be pretty embarrassing having to cancel that victory party after your loss
tomorrow Potter. But then I expect the crushing feeling of failure will hurt just as bad. ” Reg
quipped back sarcastically.

James let out a bark of laughter that instantly dropped the smirk from Regulus’s face. If there was
one surefire way to piss off a Black it was to laugh at them, their pride was too strong to take the
insult.

Reg stepped closer and gritted out at James, “And what exactly is so funny Potter?”

James couldn’t help himself from riling up Reg further and laughed once again. God damn,
Regulus Black looked sexy when he was mad.

“I was laughing at you, Reggie. I have never heard someone be so confidently wrong before?”
James taunted the Slytherin.

Reg caught James’s eye and paused as if he was thinking of something before a look of amusement
appeared on his face.

He smirked, took a small step back, and spoke, “Okay then Potter how about this. We make a bet
that if you win the game tomorrow you win and if Hufflepuff wins the game tomorrow, then I win
and you have to stop calling me Reggie. ”

James’s interest was instantly sparked, he loved the idea of not only winning the game tomorrow
but the bet as well. He especially loved that it was a bet with Regulus Black.
He thought that this might just be his opportunity to get Regulus alone and finally get his answer,
“You are so on Reggie. ”

James couldn’t help but use the nickname again to fuel Reg’s fire. The heat behind his eyes after
James used the nickname again, was something James very much enjoyed seeing.

Reg nodded and looked back slightly to make sure his friends were still there. They were and so
were about ten other people standing and watching the affair, James hadn’t noticed them at all. He
was so focused on Regulus.

Then Regulus spoke again after realizing that the crowd was waiting for his reply, “ Name your
price Potter. ”

Ohhh just what James had been waiting for. James thought hard about what he wanted.

He could ask for money or some other material object but he had enough money to buy whatever
he wanted anyway.

He could ask for Regulus to embarrass himself in front of the school and maybe he would if this
bet was with any other Slytherin. However, given the fact that James is best friends with Regulus’s
brother and the fact that they have a sexual relationship of sorts he didn’t want to ask that of him.

Then like a lightbulb turned on in his head, he knew exactly what he was gonna ask for. Oh
Merlin, why hadn’t he thought of this right away it was genius. Sirius would be so proud, then
again maybe not.

James stepped closer and leaned into Regulus’s ear and whispered, just so the two of them could
hear, “If I win you have to give me a blowjob in the locker room after the game. ”

James stepped back and reveled in the dark blush that appeared on Reg’s cheeks. Regulus Black
was not easy to make blush. He looked indignant at the suggestion and whipped his head around to
make sure nobody had heard.

When he decided that no one had, by the confused looks on everyone’s faces, he seemed to relax a
bit. He gritted out angrily, “No fucking way. ”
James smirked at him tauntingly, “Oh is the big bad Slytherin afraid of a little bet?”

He looked livid and his glare could cut through ice, “Fine. Fuck. You're on Potter. Try not to break
a leg before tomorrow.”

He pushed past James down the hill with his friends following him.

James heard one of his friends asking what James had said to him and he heard the young Black
heir’s clipped reply, “Doesn’t matter he’s not fucking winning.”

James smiled James laughed very loudly, then he winked at the surrounding students, and
practically skipped to Transfigurations.

He absolutely couldn’t wait for the game tomorrow and his reward.
 Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff

Regulus

Regulus was already starting to regret his decision to challenge James Potter to a bet. Here's the
thing, he wasn't 100% confident in Hufflepuffs chances against Gryffindor. He knew they had a
solid team and a hell of a keeper, but Gryffindor had a lot of talent too.

James Potter was possibly the best chaser to ever walk the halls of Hogwarts, Sirius was a pretty
good beater too, and as much as he hated to admit it Marlene Mckinnon wasn't a bad seeker. While
he wanted Hufflepuff to win because it bettered Slytherins chances for the cup, he mostly wanted
them to win for the satisfaction of seeing James Potter and Sirius lose.

He was still angry about everything that had taken place last week and he really wanted to see
them taken down a peg or two.

He hadn't been planning on saying anything to Potter when Barty and Evan stopped in front of him
on their way to class. He wished they would have never done it because of course, James had lured
him in with that comment about quidditch. James knew exactly what to say to get under Regulus’s
skin.

He couldn't help himself when he over-exaggerated his confidence that Hufflepuff would win the
next quidditch game because he wouldn't allow Potter to look down on Regulus and his team's
quidditch ability. Plus he had called Regulus that ridiculous nickname, that only Sirius was allowed
to call him.

Then he dared to laugh at Regulus and something in him just snapped. Before he knew it he was
challenging James Potter to bet. A bet that, even though he had seemed confident at the time, he
was rapidly losing confidence in. He just wanted to make James Potter eat his words and at the
same time get him to stop calling him Reggie.

Regulus hadn't failed to notice the immediate spark of mischief in his eyes when he had asked
James what he wanted if he won the bet. When James stepped up close to Regulus, his heart
stopped and his stomach clenched. How could he do something so inappropriate in front of so
many people?

He was immediately sure that they were outed and people would know that Regulus Black had
fooled around with the biggest blood traitor in school. Then he heard James whisper that if he won
the bet Regulus would have to suck his dick and he was shocked. He could not believe that he had
just said that in front of everyone.

He had looked around quickly as soon as James stepped back, trying to see if he had just been
outed to the world, but it appeared that everyone was just confused. Barty and Evan looked curious
but not disgusted and Regular felt himself sag in relief. He only ended up agreeing to the horrible
reward for James, because the jerk had challenged him, again.

Besides the fact that Regulus wasn't sure of Hufflepuffs chances, the reason he really regretted
making the bet was that everyone wanted to know what James got if he won. Regulus had never
been talked to so much in his five years of being in the school in one day.

Regulus by nature was a quiet and internal person. He didn't have a lot of friends, mainly because
he didn't want them. So when suddenly after the bet had been made, random students were coming
up to him and asking him about the bet he was uncomfortable.

He hadn't even told his immediate friends the finer details of the bet, so why would he tell these
random students. His friends were bothering him too. Evan couldn't believe that Regulus was
refusing to tell them what Potter had said to him and Barty seems to be looking curiously at
Regulus now. Regulus didn't think this necessarily meant that Barty was suspicious of him, but he
didn't like the way Barty seemed to be watching every move he made. Barty was incredibly
intuitive after all.

All-day Regulus had been telling people to leave him alone and so had his friends. The final straw
that broke the camel's back, however, was when Regulus was finally alone walking back from the
library.

He hadn't been able to get any studying done as people kept interrupting him. He had also seen
Potter, his brother, and the rest of their friends studying in the library too. All-day James had been
slipping sly winks his way whenever they made eye contact. He had also been doing it in the
library which made Regulus want to leave or he'd strangle the Gryffindor where he sat.

Regulus collected his stuff and headed back down to the dungeons. Or that was the plan until he
ran into Nathaniel Rowle. Otherwise known as the creeper of Slytherin house. He was in the same
year as Regulus, but thank god, not in the same dorm. Regulus wouldn't feel safe sleeping in the
same room as Rowle.

The Rowles were supporters of the Dark Lord, much like Regulus’s family, except everyone knew
that the Rowle’s specialty was the Dark Lords' dirty work. Their family did the unspeakable tasks
for the Dark Lord, which apparently even he found unpleasant enough to pass along.
Regulus had known Rowle since he was a kid and the boy had always rubbed him the wrong way.
There was something about the way he looked at Regulus as if he was prey. Regulus was not
happy about meeting him in the hallway and wanted to ignore him but was stopped by Rowle's
hand on his shoulder.

Regulus turned around quickly and shook the hand off his shoulder, “What do you want Rowle?”

Rowle looked him up and down slowly before answering, “I was just wondering where you were
hurrying off to, Black.”

Regulus hated the way he spoke. He always spoke slowly and in a deep tone. He never rushed even
a single syllable. He also never showed any emotion, Walpurga would seriously be amazed if she
saw it.

His expression never changed and his tone never changed. He was freakishly tall and towered over
everyone. He was the type to use his height to his advantage and he seems to always have the
advantage. He had dusty brown hair and dark eyes that always made Regulus shiver in discomfort
when they landed on him.

Regulus forced himself not to show his unease of talking to Rowle. Everyone knew that if someone
knew they had power over you then they'd use it to their advantage, “Just going back down to the
common room. Not everyone lurks in the corridors for fun.”

Rowle tilted his head slightly, once again looking Regulus up and down before answering, “Not
lurking. Just happened to see you coming from the library and thought that I would ask you about
what James Potter whispered in your ear.”

Regulus’s eyes widened slightly at the way his question sounded like an accusation, “ As I have
told everyone else, it's none of your fucking business.”

“Don't get your panties in a twist, Regulus. I just wonder why a loyal servant of the dark arts like
yourself is letting a blood traitor that close to him.”

Regulus was panicking. What can he even say to that? He knew he shouldn't have let Potter that
close, but he was too shocked at the time to pull back. Now Rowle was suspicious of him, great.
“I didn't let him do anything. I think you are misunderstanding what you heard, Rowle. Now if
you'll excuse me.” Regulus tried to push past the boy but he grabbed his arm.

His grip was tight and he leaned his head in from the side and whispered in Regulus’s ear,” I don't
think I misunderstood anything.” It felt distinctly worse than when James Potter had done it and
Regulus wanted nothing more than for Rowle to leave him alone, “You should be more careful
who you let near y-.”

Suddenly a voice called from down the hall interrupting Rowle, “Do Slytherins lurk in pairs now?”

Rowle instantly backed away from Regulus, letting go of his arm. Regulus took two steps back,
finally able to breathe again. He looked to see who his hero was, and then regretted thinking that
word when he saw his brother.

Sirius didn't look at Regulus as he walked up but he stared at Rowle. He turned on the Black family
glare and even though Rowle had a good six inches on Sirius, he backed down. Rowle threw one
more glance at Regulus before walking away.

Once Rowle was out of sight, Sirius turned to look at his brother, “Christ that bastard is creepy.”

Regulus couldn't help but agree, not that he would say that to Sirius. Sirius, ever the fan of his own
voice, continued, “So Reg what are the odds you are going to tell me what's the deal with this little
bet of yours with James?”

Reg felt his eyes widen, he didn't think that his brother would ask him this. Maybe he would ask
James, but Regulus and Sirius barely exchanged words so why would he choose to ask him about
it?

“And why pray tell are you not to asking your best friend, the one that you are so close with you
are practically brothers about it?”

Sirius rolled his eyes, “I did and he told me, but I had to hear what you thought about it before I did
anything else.”

Regulus smirked a little at the obvious attempt of manipulating his brother, “If you are here to ask
me that, then he either didn't tell you the truth or he didn't tell you anything. Either way, it means
you are shit out of luck.”

Sirius looked annoyed but not exactly surprised that his brother had caught him in his lie, “ Fine he
refused to tell me, which he never does. So I wanted to ask my dear sweet baby brother to tell me
the honest truth.”

Regulus let out a bark of laughter, “Wow this must really be bothering you, for you to pull out so
many uncharacteristic words to describe me.”

“I just want to know why my best friend and my brother have some kind of a secret bet going on
that nobody in the entire school seems to know what the stakes are.”

“Everyone knows what the bet is about Sirius.”

“You’re right everyone knows that you are betting against the Gryffindor team. Which makes no
sense, you have to know that they don't have a chance tomorrow. So tell me what is the stake of
this bet, that is such a secret yet you have no problem having to fulfill because you know that you
will lose the bet.”

Unfortunately, Regulus did know that. He knew that he would have to more than likely fulfill his
end of the bet tomorrow. He tried not to think about it because his stomach clenched in nerves
every time he did.

“It's eating you up inside. You hate that I know something about James that you don't.”

Regulus was sure Sirius could hear the mirth in his voice but he couldn't help it. This situation was
just too sweet to not gloat a bit.

“Since when do you call him James? And are you going to tell me or not?”

Regulus realized he might have slipped up slightly by calling James by his first name rather than
Potter. He decided to turn this conversation to his favor once more, “ Since he and I apparently
have secrets together.” Regulus made sure to wink slightly when he said this, knowing it would
enrage Sirius,” By the way maybe you're dear sweet brother would have told you, until you made it
your mission in life to make sure he couldn't do anything without the professors watching.”
With that Regulus turned to walk away and he heard Sirius yell out to him, “ You're such a fucking
dick.”

Regulus called over his shoulder at his brother, “Good luck tomorrow, you'll need it.”

Regulus went to bed that night dreaming of a Hufflepuff win the next day and himself gloating at
his brother and James.

******************************************************************************

Regulus

James Potter was an absolute animal. He is graceful like a doe, powerful like a lion, and quick as a
viper. All of these skills were very apparent to Regulus as he watched the Hufflepuff vs. Gryffindor
quidditch game. Regulus had always known that James was extremely talented on the quidditch
pitch but he had never known to what extent.

James was not only an incredible athlete but clearly a wonderful strategist as well. His team was
dominating Hufflepuff and Regulus felt a bit bad for the seventh year captain of the Hufflepuff as
this would put them in last place for the cup.

Regulus could hardly believe that even with the cut-back practice time, Gryffindor was playing this
well. James certainly pulled this team up to new heights during his short time as team captain.

James Potter was playing better than Regulus had ever seen him. He had scored more points than
the entire Hufflepuff team had so far. He was cocky about it too. He was doing little displays of
celebration after each goal. These included blowing kisses at the stands, performing tricks on his
broom, and even yelling various things to the crowd.

Regulus couldn't actually hear what Potter had been yelling, for the most part, he focused his
celebration near the Gryffindor stands and since Regulus was sitting with Hufflepuffs he missed it.
Sirius was clearly feeling cocky himself as he appeared to be hitting the bludgers in the oddest
fashion; behind his back, with one arm raised in the air and even upside down once. Sirius was also
having a very good game.

He was always pretty good at quidditch, he didn't have the talent Regulus had, but he was still
pretty good. Regulus couldn't help but scoff at the show the two boys were putting on. The energy
in the Hufflepuff stands had degraded pretty quickly when everyone realized that Gryffindor was
on their game today. Regulus was sitting with a group of Slytherins, who were practically seething
at the scoreboard.

Evan, who was sitting on one side of Regulus wouldn't stop whining, “ Ugh I wish those Huffpuffs
would knock Potter out of the sky. If I was playing and saw him blowing kisses into the stands
after every score, I’d make sure he never played again.”

Regulus snorted and Mulciber who was in the row in front of Regulus turned and said, “Yeah he'd
never wanna play again after watching you attempt to fly for two hours straight.”

Regulus might not like Mulciber all that much but he couldn't help but join in the laughter at his
friend. Mulciber was right, Evan was one of the worst quidditch players Regulus had ever seen.
Watching Evan try out for the quidditch team a couple of years back had been the most
embarrassing thing Regulus ever had to watch.

Evan mumbled something under his breath but didn't seem to want to respond verbally to Mulciber.
Regulus thought that was a bit odd. If there was one this Evan loved, it was the sound of his own
voice. The fact that he didn't want to argue with Mulciber made Regulus think that perhaps Barty
was right about Evans's intentions. Maybe he did want to impress Mulciber.

Regulus soon became distracted again when the Gryffindor stands erupted in cheers, Potter had
scored again.

Regulus started to let his mind drift to what was going to take place after the game. He hadn't let
himself consider it yet, because it made him so anxious just thinking about it.

Now though there was no avoiding it. Soon enough one of the seekers would catch the snitch and
either way Gryffindor would win. And since Gryffindor would win, that meant that James Potter
would win their bet too.

This meant that not only did Slytherin just become third in place for the cup standings and James
would have free reign to call him Reggie, but he would have to put James’s thing in his mouth.

Eww. It grossed him out even thinking about it. He couldn't imagine doing it, even though James
had done it for him a few weeks ago. Though Regulus had not asked James to do that, he had really
enjoyed it. Maybe it was the polite thing to return the favor but Regulus could be selfish and he
knew that. He also knew that being selfish isn't an option tonight, because he had screwed himself
over by making this bet.

Okay, it wasn't going to be that bad. He was definitely overreacting. People did this all the time.
Girls and boys both if others could do it then so could Regulus. The thing was, that he didn't know
how to do it. He knew the basics of what was expected but he didn't know how to make it good for
James. And if he was going to do it then he was going to be good at it. If there was one thing worse
than sucking a dick, then it was sucking a dick badly.

Oh god, what if it was so bad that James couldn't come. Oh god, what if James took back his offer
to experiment with Regulus after he found out Regulus had no experience. Merlin, there would be
nothing more damaging to a man's ego than that.

Regulus had no one he could ask for advice when it came to this stuff. Scratch that he had no one
he would trust with this information either. So he would have to suck it up and hope that he didn't
suck, or did.

Regulus snapped to attention when the crowd started cheering and the Hufflepuffs started
groaning. Marlene Mckinnon had caught the snitch and the game was over.

Fucking shit, he had hoped he would have more time to wallow in self-pity before going to face his
doom.

Evan and the rest of the Slytherins started to leave until Evan realized Regulus wasn't getting up
with them, “Hey Regs, are you coming?”

Regulus made sure to school his face into a bored expression to hide all the anxiety he was feeling,
“Nah I gotta find Potter after the game and Settle this bet.”

Mulciber turned a smug expression on Regulus, “Oh right the famous bet, that nobody knows the
price of. Why is that, Black?”

Regulus shrugged and looked back to Evan, “Hey I shouldn't be too long. I'll meet you in the
common room later.”

Avery sauntered forward and threw his arm around Evans's shoulder, smirking, “No can do little
Black. Rosier is coming with Mulciber, Snape, and me to welcome some first-years to the school.”
Regulus rolled his eyes,” They've already been at the school for almost two months.”

Mulciber laughed sharply,” What Mr. Avery meant that we are going to be welcoming them to the
cause.”

“The cause?”

Mulciber raised his eyebrows at Regulus, “Don't play dumb, Black. Everyone knows you're part of
the cause too, even though you like to pretend you're not. You are welcome to join us after your
little meeting with the blood traitor though.”

Regulus struggled not to screw his face up in revulsion, “I'll pass. Thanks.”

Mulciber shrugged, “Suit yourself. Snape created a wicked new curse and we're going to show
them first hand.”

With that Avery and Mulciber started to walk away and Regulus turned back to his friend. Regulus
wondered if Evan was really going to go down this path. Was he really stupid enough to hang out
with those assholes? Apparently, he was.

“We will hang out tomorrow, Regs. See ya!” With that, he took off after the other boys, and
Regulus was left in an empty stand. He was left alone with his thoughts.

******************************************************************************

James

James was on top of the world. He had never played so well in his life. He knew for a fact there
were league scouts at this game and he was sure to be contacted by them soon. He literally could
not miss today.

He had a feeling that it was the thought of what would happen if he won the game. He won his bet
with Regulus Black. He won his prize from Regulus Black. He would finally get his answer to
whether Regulus wanted to see him again or not. He was feeling so smug during the game that he
had even risked a wink at Regulus in the stands. Regulus had glared but James found that adorable.
The boy looked as menacing as a tulip.
Once the post locker room celebration had passed and everyone had headed up to the castle to
begin the real celebration in the Gryffindor common room, James jumped in the shower to make
sure he was clean.

After that, he waited and waited for Regulus to show up. He was sat on the bench with his towel
around his waist, expecting a tall black-haired boy to walk through. He didn't.

After about twenty minutes of him sitting around in his towel feeling ridiculous, he decided
Regulus wasn't coming. As disappointed as he was, at least he had still won the game. He turned to
his locker and was about to start changing into his street clothes when he heard the door open
behind him.

He turned around quicker than he'd like to admit. There in the doorway of the locker room was
Regulus Black. James inhaled slightly at the sight of the boy.

Regulus didn't say anything but he did walk towards James. James tried to talk to him, “Hey what
did you think of the game today?”

Regulus looked at him as if he was stupid but did not respond. James didn't like the idea of just
getting down to business without talking a little first so he tried again, “I saw you in the Hufflepuff
stands.”

Regulus sighed and stopped walking when he was about a yard away from James, “When I have a
bet with someone I am obviously going to show up and where else would I have sat.”

James started to speak and Regulus interrupted, “Don't you dare say the Gryffindor stands.”

James felt a little embarrassed because that was exactly where he was just about to suggest, “I
wasn't going to say that. I was just trying to make conversation okay? Make this a little less
awkward.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “I would rather get this over with sooner rather than later.”

Then Regulus dropped to his knees in front of James. Holy Christ this was actually happening.
He’d had a blow job before, by a couple of muggle girls in a village nearby his house, but never
from a boy. Never from someone he had as much history with as Regulus Black.
Despite the confidence with which Regulus walked into the room and the insistence that he wanted
to get this thing over with, James could see the nervousness in his eyes. He had clearly never done
this before either. James felt bad. He felt so bad that he willing to forfeit his winnings.

“Hey, Reg. We really don't have to do this. You can just buy me a butterbeer sometime and we can
call it even.”

Regulus’s head snapped up to look at James's face rather than his crotch. He looked disbelieving of
what he was hearing, “No these were the terms of the bet. I don't go back on my word Potter.”

“That's very noble of you but I don't want to force you to do anything you aren't comfortable with.”

Regulus snorted loudly, “You're the one who made up the terms of the bet Potter. Clearly, you
didn't care about my comfort level when you chose this as your prize.”

“You're right. That was really dumb of me. I was feeling a little cocky and defensive when you told
me that Hufflepuff was going to beat us.”

Regulus rolled his eyes dramatically still kneeling in front of James, “Listen Potter I am fine with
terms of the bet. I am going to follow through so you can get off your moral high ground and enjoy
what's to come.”

James raised his eyebrows at the sudden control Regulus was showing. He decided to listen to
Regulus and to enjoy his prize.

Regulus, taking his silence as an answer, slowly moved his hands forward and shakily undid the
knot that was holding James's towel on. When the towel fell, Regulus’s eyes widened and he made
a small noise of surprise. James didn't really understand why Regulus would be surprised, it's not
like he didn't know what he was going to see when he undid the towel.

James felt a little exposed while Regulus was just staring at his most private area. He seemed to be
taking it all in and James started to feel a bit nervous as well.

Finally, Regulus spoke rather softly, “I-It’s big.”

James felt himself blush, which was not a cool thing to do at this moment. He wanted Regulus to
see him as cool and good looking not nervous and awkward. When he finally found his voice it
came out rough and raspy, “It's pretty average. Just seems a bit bigger when you're so close.”

Regulus nodded slightly but didn't reply. His hand moved to touch James and James held his breath
waiting to feel the contact.

James hitched his breath, Reggie’s hands cold and soft. He instantly felt himself become aroused
and he hoped that wasn't embarrassingly soon.

It took Regulus a minute of touching before he felt comfortable enough to put his mouth on James.
James loved it. He didn't know why but it felt so different when Regulus did this rather than the
muggle girls James used to hang out with during the summer vacations.

It's not that Regulus was that much better than them, although he did seem to possess a certain skill
for the action, it was the fact that it was Regulus Black. Regulus was incredibly handsome and
wicked smart, it was incredible thinking that he had that pompous boy on his knees for James.

When James finished, a little sooner than he would've liked to, Regulus pulled back panting. It was
then that James realized that he had come in Regulus’s mouth without warning. Fuck, Regulus was
probably pissed. When he looked at Regulus, though, he didn't seem to be any more hostile
towards James than he usually was. He stood up brushing off his pants.

It was then that James decided that he should return the favor, so he began sliding to his own knees
until Regulus stopped him with a hand on his arm, “What are you doing?”

“I am returning the favor, Obviously.” James thought it would've been obvious so he motioned
towards Regulus as he spoke.

Regulus’s eyes widened slightly, “No. No, this was your prize Potter.”

James rolled his eyes, “So? I feel bad if I left you with that when you went back up to the castle.”

Once again James motioned to Regulus’ more specifically the noticeable bulge in his pants.
 Regulus looked down and flushed a dark red, clearly embarrassed by his body's reaction, “It’ll be
fine Potter. It's nothing serious.”

James chuckled slightly but then he relented, “Fine I won't return the exact same favor, but I am
not letting you leave the locker room with that.”

He looked down at it again to show Regulus, what he was referring to. Then he stepped forward
and put his hand on it. He heard Regulus take a deep breath as he shoved his hand in the Slytherins
pants.

He enjoyed the sounds Regulus made when he was aroused, so much that he almost got aroused
again. Once had finished he went and washed his hands. To his surprised when he got back
Regulus was still standing there awkwardly.

James thought this was great because he wanted to make sure he got to talk to Regulus before he
began avoiding James again, “Hey Reg, have you ever done that before?”

James thought that he must have otherwise he wasn't sure how he got so good at it. Regulus shook
his head, “No of course not. I am not gay Potter.”

James raised his eyebrows, “No of course not, Reggie. I just thought you were too good at it to be a
beginner.”

Regulus smiled slightly. He actually smiled, James couldn't believe it. Regulus Black rarely
smiled, at least not for real.

“Natural talent I guess.”

James smiled at the arrogance in his tone, “Alright well, do you think you'd ever want to put that
natural talent to good use again?”

“What do you mean?

“I mean that you never got back to me on that proposal I made to you. I think it would be very
mutually beneficial to both of us. What do you say?”
“I say what I said when you mentioned it the first time. It's an astronomically stupid idea Potter.”

“Maybe so but you still kind of want to say yes don't you?”

Regulus bit his bottom lip thinking it over, “Fine ya know what Potter? Fuck it I am in.”

James grinned widely, “Shit really?”

“Yes but the minute one of us wants to end it, we end it. No bothering the other person when it's
done right?”

“Absolutely, you got it.”

Regulus nodded and began walking to the door, “Fine, enjoy your party Potter.”

With that Regulus walked out of the locker room and James couldn't stop grinning as he made his
way up to the school. He couldn't stop grinning when he got to the party. He could stop grinning
all night, with the thought of Regulus Black in his head.
 Sweet Tooth

James

James was very drunk.

He was having a great time celebrating the victory of the Gryffindor team today. Today was the
best his team had ever played together and he wanted to make sure they enjoyed their victory. So
for tonight, he wouldn't mention the small mistakes made during the game and he wouldn't
mention practice. He had made sure this party would be set up for them as soon as they got back
from dinner.

James had skipped dinner in favor of meeting Regulus Black. By the time he had made it back to
the castle, it was time for the party to begin. So he and Sirius had pulled out the many bottles of
firewhiskey, rum, and ale that Sirius had gotten from Madam Rosmerta. She had always had a soft
spot for the marauders, Sirius in particular.

Once Peter and Remus had pulled Remus’s record player and the cumulative record collection.
Soon after the Gryffindors began their celebration, the other houses started to pour in. Gryffindor
parties were always open to the entire school, except for Slytherin of course. James didn't know
any Slytherin’s that would even want to come to a Gryffindor party.

James sought out the Hufflepuff captain, Gregory Hansen, and expressed sympathy for the ass-
kicking they received today, not that he used those words. Once he received affirmation that
Gregory and he were still on good terms, he began to really let himself enjoy the night.

He made sure to help himself to some good firewhiskey and then he struck up a conversation with
Peter, who had decided that Magdalene Reese was the most enchanting creature in the room, James
thought it was obviously Lily Evans. James felt himself getting more and more drunk as the
conversation continued.

“Are you fucking stoned Pete? Even if we ignored for a second that Evans has the best hair in our
year, Mary’s smile is way better than Magdalene”

“That’s bullshit, James. You are so biased because you're practically in love with Evans. Hey
Remus, come here I have got to ask you something.”

“Oh come on Wormtail, don't drag Moony into this, he’s gay he won't care.”
Remus was just reaching for their conversation, when Peter responded to James a bit louder than
was necessary, “So what? He can still see who the best-looking girl in our year is.”

Remus cut in before James could continue his argument with Peter, “Are you guys seriously
spending this party getting sloshed in the corner arguing about who’s the best looking chick here”

When he said the word chick he raised his fingers in air quotes, clearly showing how ridiculous he
found this conversation. That made James feel a bit silly, Remus always had a way of putting
things in perspective for him. James realized that both he and Peter were much more intoxicated
than he thought they were, so it was probably about time they joined the rest of the party.

Peter must've been feeling the same way because he stood up, stumbling slightly and spilling a bit
of his rum, “Not anymore I guess. I am going to go find Magdalene and tell her what I think of her
rather than James.”
James and Remus both laughed as they watched their friend stumble away, then James turned to
Remus, “Where’s Padfoot?”

Remus rolled his eyes and pointed towards the other end of the room with his beer in his hand, “
He’s over there of course. Do you really think Sirius wouldn't want to be the center of attention at a
party?”

James laughed a bit when thinking of his beloved friend, who could not handle not being the center
of attention in any situation. He looked at his friend and wondered if he was having a good time or
not. He looked like he was drinking but he didn't seem as joyously drunk as the rest of the party

“You alright Moony? Having a good time?”

Remus looked at James before sighing, “Yeah I am. I just wish it was easier for me to get drunk.”
Unfortunately, it was a bit more difficult for Remus to get drunk than it was himself, because of his
furry little problem. He could still do it but it definitely took more effort, “That's okay though. I
will get there eventually. By the way, congratulations on the win today. You guys crushed the
Hufflepuffs.”

James smirked at the idea of Remus actually paying attention during a quidditch game, rather than
just reading a book and only looking up at the cheers, “Oh yeah thank you. Does that mean you
actually watched the game?”

Remus smiled back at James, “ Well when my section was celebrating practically the whole time, I
didn't have much choice, did I? Besides who else would have caught all the kisses you were
blowing at the stands.”

James let out a loud laugh and took another swig of whiskey, “Well good because they were all for
you and Pete.”

“Sure they were, you showboat.”

James stood up and slung his arm around Remus’s shoulder, “Let's go take some shots and get you
on my level my dear Moony.”

Remus chuckled, “I don't know if I will quite get to your level, James. But yeah let's do it.”

Together they walked deeper into the party to get thoroughly sloshed.

************************************************************************
James was drunk.

He was currently leaning against a wall of the Gryffindor common room, talking to this Ravenclaw
fifth year. Her name was Tabitha Leland and James had never talked to her before tonight. It was
actually odd, she had just walked up to him while he was grabbing a drink and starting talking to
him. She was gushing about how he had done in the quidditch match and he was a little too
egotistical not to enjoy the compliments.

He couldn't be sure but it seemed like she might be flirting with him. James had always been rather
flirtatious himself, whether he liked the person he was talking to or not, so he was trying not to
assume her intentions. That was pretty hard when she was giggling at everything he said and kept
touching his shoulder, though.

It wasn't long until she found her opening in the conversation and began leaning in as if she wanted
to kiss him. He thought that was a bit forward from a few minutes of conversation but considered
kissing her. That was until he thought of his time spent in the locker room earlier in the night with
Regulus Black. He knew that Regulus most likely wouldn't care if he kissed this girl, but he
couldn't bring himself to actually do it. While she was very pretty in a conventional way, she didn't
have the beauty that Regulus Black did. She didn't insult him and argue with him as Regulus did.
She wasn't a challenge the way he was.

SO James found himself gently turning her down and returning to the rest of the marauders on the
chairs by the fireplace.
While he thought he walked over pretty well considering his intoxication, that was not the response
he got from Sirius, “ Jesus Jamie are you so drunk you couldn't see that girl fawning all over you?”

James was confused, he was drunk, but he still knew when a girl was hitting on him. Why would
Sirius ask him that, “No I knew that she wanted to kiss me.”

Sirius looked at him aghast. Which was sort of amusing considering he looked drunk enough to fall
over. Remus, who looked to be having more fun than before tilted his head questionably, “Then
why are you over here and not with her?”

James looked between them confused, “Why would I be over with her instead of with you guys. I
love you guys.”

Remus let out a laugh and Sirius blurted out, “Maybe because you just told us she was hot before
you went over to her at the drink table.”

“Wait what? I don't remember saying that.” James strained his memory the best he could, but he
didn't remember seeing her before he went to the drink table.

Sirius burst out laughing now too and with the way he was tilting towards Remus it wouldn't be
long before he fell over, “You've sloshed Jamie Boy! Why didn't you bring her up to the dorm if
you were too shy to snog her in public? Moony and I would've stayed out of your way.”

Remus drawled, taking another sip of his beer, “Too bad Pete already beat him to that Pads.”

James and Sirius snapped their heads towards Remus and almost in unison asked, “With who?”

At least it had sounded in vision to James at the time but now considering the confused expression
of Remus’s face they hadn't been that in sync.

“If you are asking who he's with, then it's Magdalene Reese”

“No fucking way!”

“Way to go Petey boy!”

Sirius was absolutely shocked that Peter had one of the prettiest girls in their year in their room.
While James couldn't be prouder of his best friends. He always thought that any girl would be
lucky to be with Peter. Peter was a great guy, but sometimes he got overlooked being friends with
Sirius, who was always considered the best-looking boy in their year.

Sirius finally shook off his shock, “Well good for Wormy. So James, are you going to tell us why
you didn't snog that girl senseless?”

James shrugged, “I don't know I just didn't really want to.”

Remus and Sirius looked at each other questionably. James decided he didn't like the scrutiny he
was getting from his friends. This party was no longer as fun as he was having before. He sort of
wished that Regulus was there. He knew that was obviously not an option, but he still had the urge
to see him. Before his friends could question him anymore he ran up the stairs to their dorm, and
much to his embarrassment tripping on his way up.

He had forgotten all about Peter and Magdalene until he opened the door. Luckily Pete's curtains
were closed on his bed, but James could hear distinctly snogging noises.
He quickly snuck over to his bed, attempting to be as quiet as possible. He grabbed his invisibility
cloak and his school bag.

He threw the cloak over himself and stumbled his way down the stairs. He dodged his way past
the dancing bodies in the full common room. He might've even bumped into a couple people, but it
was so busy no one noticed. He was just passing by Remus and Sirius who were standing in the
same place he left them when he heard what they were talking about.

Sirius sounded rather angry, “No Moony I am not saying that James has to kiss any pretty girl he
sees, but he specifically told us he thought she was attractive.”

Remus rolled his eyes, sounding annoyed, “Maybe not everyone has to snog everyone they find
attractive, Sirius.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?”

“What do you think it means?”

With that Remus began storming away from Sirius and James saw his best friend following Remus
while calling his name to get him to stop walking away from him.

Once they were out of earshot James continued his journey out of the common room. Once he
reached the hallway he was shocked by the silence that greeted him. He quickly found a
windowsill that he could use to write a note. He dug out his ink and quill and scribbled quickly on
the note. Once he was finished he folded it into a sloppy bird and whispered an incantation over it.
Soon the bird was flapping its wings down the stairs.

James began to follow it at a much slower pace, re-covered in his invisibility cloak.

******************************************************************************
Regulus

Regulus was bored to tears. He didn't mind being alone, in fact, he loved it. For some reason
tonight he didn't necessarily want to be alone. Evan was still out with the wannabe death eaters and
god knows what they were up to. Regulus wasn't sure he even wanted to imagine the possibilities.

The last time Regulus saw Barty he was on an armchair in the common room with a scantily
dressed brunette on his lap. Regulus honestly didn't know where Barty found these girls. He had
never seen her before so he knew she wasn't a Slytherin. He didn't dwell on the girl's identity
though, because he knew she wouldn't be around long.

He was attempting to read a muggle book about a desperate heartthrob who saves a damsel from an
arranged marriage. He thought it was a bit of a cliche and it wasn't captivating his interest at the
moment. He generally enjoyed muggle romance stories, but tonight he couldn't focus on the words
on the page.

He kept thinking about James Potter and what his agreement of sneaking around to meet him in
secret meant. Did this mean that he and Potter would have to talk about stuff? He really hoped not.
He found James attractive but he didn't particularly want to hear the boy's dimwitted opinions.

He was sitting up and stretching his back when there was a tap on the door. Huh, that's odd, Evan
or Barty wouldn't knock.

He stood up and went to open the door and was surprised to see no one there, but a paper bird was
flapping in front of him. Regulus wondered who it possibly could be from.

He let it land on his palm and went to sit on his bed to read the note.

Reggie,

Meet me outside of your common room at 11:30.

Don't leave me waiting too long.
-The most talented boy you know

Regulus rolled his eyes at the signature. James Bloody Potter, the cockiest boy in Hogwarts. Why
was he already sending Regulus a message to meet. They had been together a little over five hours
ago, not very long at all. Plus wasn't he supposed to be at the Gryffindor victory party right now?

Regulus pondered whether he should meet Potter or not. It wasn't a very good idea to meet the
golden boy of Gryffindor right outside of the Slytherin common room. What if James waited out
there all night? That would probably be even worse.

So Regulus straightened his clothes and slowly made his way through the dorms. Luckily the
common room wants too full. And that those who were out there were occupied with other things.
Evan wasn't out there so that meant Mulciber and Avery must still be out with him. Barty was now
fully snogging the aforementioned brunette, in a way that made Regulus uncomfortable just
looking at them.

He quickly hurried through the common room door out to the corridors. Once he was out there he
looked around for James.

He was nowhere to be found. Oh, no had this been some twisted Marauders prank. A way to torture
and tease Regulgu. Had Sirius been aware of it the whole time. Regulus flushed with
embarrassment when suddenly James appeared in front of him.

“Why so red Reggie?”

Regulus’s eyes got comically wide and he gaped, “What the fuck? Do you have an invisibility
cloak?”

James had a cocky smirk on his face as he responded lazily, “I don't know Reg, do I?”

With that, he pulled the cloak over him and disappeared. Regulus reached over to the spot James
had been and punched him.

James quickly reappeared, “Ouch Reg. What the hell was that for?”

“How did you get that?”

Regulus couldn't believe that James was in possession of something so rare and interesting.

“It's a family heirloom.”

“So that's how you and my brother are able to pull off so many of your pranks.”
James smiled back at him and then reached over and put one finger across Regulus’s lips, “Shhh
don't tell anyone. It's just one of the secrets to our success.”

Regulus was shocked by the sudden contact and he realized that James was drunk. Truly and surely
drunk. The more Regulus looked at him the more it was obvious. He slightly swayed while he
stood and all of his words had a slight slur to them.

“You're drunk. Did you have fun at your party, Potter?”

“Yes, I will have you know that I did.”

“Oh really so then why are you here with me rather than at the party. Did you miss me already
Potter?”

“Yes”

Regulus had not been expecting that response, “Uh… what?”

James smiled a real good-natured smile at him, “I really want to show you something. Will you
come with me Reg?”

Regulus felt confused. James was drunk, yes, but he had just said he had missed Regulus. Maybe he
mistook him for Sirius. They did look rather alike. He also seemed rather energetic about this thing
he wanted to show Regulus.

Regulus knew it wasn't a good idea to go anywhere with James Potter, especially a drunk James
Potter, but he couldn't help his curiosity.

“Fine Potter, but it better be worth my time.”

“It will be trust me. Come on get under the cloak with me.”

James held up the cloak for Regulus to join him under. Regulus hesitated, it would be a rather tight
squeeze to cover them both. In the end, he relented, joining James.

Together they walked in silence, trying not to wake up any of the paintings they passed. They
walked for quite a while before James stopped. They were on the third floor in the corridor in front
of the one-eyed witch statue.

Just as Regulus was about to ask why they were there, James whispered the phrase Dissendium and
tapped the sculpture with his wand.

Suddenly the witch's hump opened up revealing a tunnel of sorts. A hidden passageway. Regulus
had always been fascinated with Hogwarts history and he knew there were many passageways like
this one hidden among the school. He personally had never found one though.

Somehow James had though. James Potter was full of surprises tonight. Regulus felt like laughing,
he couldn't believe that James had shown him not only an invisibility cloak but a secret passage as
well.

“Wow. How in the world did you discover this?”

James preened, clearly proud of his discovery, “That dear boy is another secret of the Marauders,
so I can not tell you. But I will show you where it leads.”

Regulus looked down the long dark passage in curiosity. He wanted to discover where it lead. He
wanted to know everything he could about it. He wanted to ask James more details about the
invisibility cloak. He also knew that spending any more time with James Potter tonight was a
terrible idea. What if one of his roommates came back to the room and went looking for him. What
if they started to suspect that he was doing something he shouldn't be.

Regulus considered these thoughts, but once he realized that his friends would never guess he was
hanging around Potter, he figured what was the harm. He was feeling a bit reckless tonight,
anyways.

“Okay show me the way, Potter.”

James smiled at him and stepped into the tunnel, he then held a hand out for Regulus to take.
Regulus scoffed, he wasn't a damsel in distress from one of his muggle books, he could walk on his
own. As he stepped into the tunnel, however, he felt himself trip on the lip of the entrance. Merlin,
that was embarrassing.

James let out a roar of laughter, “ Watch your step Reggie, this way isn't paved.”

James muttered Lumos and lit the tunnel. It was dirty and gross but it also amazed Regulus. As
they walked along the path, Regulus examined his surroundings thoroughly. He even asked James
more questions regarding the tunnel and what the marauders use it for. Some of the questions
James answered, some of them he did not. He did however do a lot of stumbling along the path as
they walked, most likely from the bottle of firewhiskey he smelled like.

They walked for at least two miles down the path before they came to a wood door. It looked a bit
like a cellar door. James opened it and pulled Reg into the next room with him.

Regulus was shocked to see that it was a dark room filled with candy. Heaps and heaps of candy.
Holy crap they must be in Hogsmeade. In Honeydukes, specifically, maybe the cellar where they
kept the extra candy.

Regulus turned with wide eyes towards James, who was looking at him smugly, “This is
incredible. You've known about this for three years?”

James laughed, “Yes we have. It's honestly one of the best massages we've found.”

“One of? You've discovered more?”

“Of course Regulus. Once we discover this one do you think we could've just stopped at one.”

“Tell me about them.”

“Sure Reg I will tell you all about them, but first I want to sit down and get myself some candy.”

“Oh right yeah we can do that, but how do you pay for it down here?”

James laughed, “I would've thought that a Slytherin like yourself would have no problem stealing.”

“Slytherins aren't without morals, James. I wouldn't just steal for no reason.”

“Well, that's good to hear, because I could never do that either. I just leave some galleons by the
cellar door over there that way they get paid but they don't know that we snuck in.”

“Oh well I guess that's a good idea, but I didn't bring any of my money with me.”

James laughed slightly and reached for a handful of lemon drops, “Don't worry Reg I'll pay for
whatever you take of course. I would never expect you to pay when I sprung this on you.”

Regulus narrowed his eyes at James, “I am not a girl, James. This is not a date. I don't need you to
pay for me.”

James rolled his eyes, “Obviously not, but hey if it makes you feel better you can pay me back
later.”

Regulus considered disagreeing but logically it made plenty of good sense, “Fine I will pay you
back later then.”

With that, he went and grabbed a few chocolate frogs and sherbert balls and went and found a place
to sit on the floor by a barrel of peppermint toads. James picked his chosen candy and joined
Regulus by the barrel.

James held out a carton of Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans to Regulus, ”Want any?”

Regulus wrinkled his nose. He had never been a fan of the unpredictability of the candy, but he
didn't want James to call him a coward. So he reached out and plucked a bean from the carton,
eww it was grass.

James must've realized it was a gross flavor by Regulus’s facial expression and he laughed loudly.

“So are you going to tell me more about the passages you know about or what?”

They spent hours in the cellar of Honeydukes talking, which was the last thing Regulus thought he
would be doing with James Potter. They talked about the passages the marauders had discovered,
they talked about the invisibility cloak and the legend behind it, and the rest of the deathly hallows
and ate those disgusting beans until they were all gone.

Regulus couldn't remember the last time he had so much fun and felt so carefree.
 Liar, Liar

Regulus

James Potter was a fucking idiot.

Once again he has done something unforgivable. James and Regulus had been meeting a couple of
times a week for almost a month and it could've been going worse. Regulus actually was managing
not to hex him each meeting and then he pulls this shit.

Regulus hated James Potter and his idea of a joke. This was definitely not funny. James and the
other marauders were childish and cruel.

Professor Dumbledore hadn't even taken the situation seriously, he just laughed it off and told us it
would wear off by the end of the day. The end of the day? Didn't the most powerful wizard of all
time realize that the damage would already be done by then. They would be teased and taunted for
weeks because of this little prank. Regulus wouldn't be as mad if they would have gotten the entire
school or at least the entire Slytherin house, but no they didn't. Instead, there were only about
twenty Slytherin students involved in this prank.

He didn't know what he had done to be involved in this little prank. Sirius usually never involved
him directly in the pranks they pulled, but maybe he was still mad because Regulus refused to tell
him what the bet was about. Though that would be stupid considering it was a month ago and
Regulus had much better reasons to be mad at his brother than Sirius did.

Then there was James Potter. Regulus had no idea what that knob’s excuse was. What was his
reasoning for pranking Regulus in this way? All Regulus had done to him in the last month was let
the daft prick, snog, and grope him senseless. So really he had no reason for complaints
whatsoever. After this little joke though, Potter would be lucky if Regulus even meant him for their
meeting later that day.

In fact, that was the plan. Regulus had no intention of meeting James Potter, he really didn't.
Regulus didn't think that the git deserved Regulus to even tell him that. So he just planned on
standing the bastard up. He could imagine the bastard standing in the cellar of Honeydukes in the
middle of the night waiting. He wanted to laugh as the image came to his head.

He didn't actually get that image to become truth though. He had been walking towards his
common room from his last class of the day. Then suddenly he felt his body being pulled to the
side and into a cupboard. There was a small Lumos light floating above his head and he wasn't
remotely surprised to see James Potter in front of him.

Regulus got straight to glaring at him. Glaring at him for pulling such a prank. Glaring at him for
ruining Regulus’s plan to stand James up. He decided that he would still give the boy the silent
treatment. Or at least he had planned to.

James let out a laugh and ran his hand over Regulus’s hair, “Oh wow Reg. Who knew you'd look
good in pink.”
Regulus did not look good in pink. Yet that is the color he had to walk around in all day. His
beautiful black hair was now bright ugly pink. It worked to make him even paler than he already
was.

He had been teased about it all day, by both people he talked to and people he didn't. Regulus hated
the fact that James felt like he could pull Regulus wherever he wanted to after the stunt he pulled.
Or that he felt he could laugh at Regulus instead of begging for forgiveness. And then he had the
audacity to touch Regulus’s hair.

Regulus batted away James’s hand and stepped away from him, still not saying anything but
deepening his glare.

James quirked an eyebrow at Regulus, “What wrong? You don't like your new hair color?”

Regulus could still hear the laughter in James’s voice. He scoffed in answer and turned his head
away from James. James stepped closer, “Oh I get it. You're giving me the silent treatment.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, wow James was not quick on the uptake. He really was just a pretty face.

“The question is why. I mean you could be mad about the last time we meant but considering the
way you shuttered in my arms, I am going to doubt that. You could be angry about your day and
take it out on me. Or you could be mad about the prank we pulled this morning, but I am not sure
why you would be.”

Regulus was not going to speak to him. He really was planning on it, but James just made him so
mad. So before he even realized he had made a decision he heard himself speak in a biting tone,
“Oh really no fucking reason to be mad. Really Potter are you that stupid? I can not believe you!”
“Ah, there you go. I knew you couldn't go too long without talking to me.”

Regulus burned, he couldn't believe the audacity of this boy. He considered yelling at James but
then he remembered that James was an extrovert. So he decided to go back to his plans of ignoring
James until he was annoyed enough to apologize. It had better be a damn good apology too.

James picked up on this action pretty quick once Regulus crossed his arms and glared at him,
“Come on Reg, what's wrong?”

Regulus said nothing but when James stepped closer to him and reached for Regulus’s waist he
slapped the hand away and glared as icely as he could. He was sure the effect was dampened by
his ridiculous hair.

James looked offended by the rejection. He messed up his hair and asked a lot less sure of himself,
“Does this have anything to do with the prank?”

Regulus couldn't hold it anymore, “Of course it does you, imbecile. Do you even see what you did
to my hair? I look absolutely ridiculous and people have been laughing at me all day.”

“Come on Reg. You weren't the only person who got pranked. I just never knew you liked apricot
jam on your toast for breakfast.”

“Oh right I wasn't the only one pranked but once again you and your stupid friends pranked
Slytherins. And I am sorry that my choice of breakfast made me a target.”

“That's not fair we do prank other houses an-”

Regulus interrupted, “Bullshit. You only prank other houses when you prank the whole school and
that never includes Gryffindor coincidentally.”

“Fine so I am biased. I don't like pranking my own house and I love pranking yours because most
of your housemates are right gits.”

“Yeah right. Like you know most of my housemates.”

James shrugged, “I know enough, besides you, can't tell me you didn't find Mulcibers purple hair
funny.”

Regulus had to fight back the smile at the mental image of Mulcibers hair. No, he was still mad at
James, “That is absolutely not the point I am making.”

James stepped closer, “I know it's not, but I don't want to argue anymore. I pulled you in here
because I thought you looked fucking gorgeous this morning and I couldn't stop thinking about
running my hands through that pink hair.”

Regulus snorted at James’s teasing tone, “You are such an idiot Potter.”

“Only for you Black. But seriously I am going to have to miss our meeting tonight. Sirius is getting
pissed that I haven't made time for him lately. Needy, that brother of yours is.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at the thought of his brother, “ No of course he is. I mean how dare you not
spend every available moment with him.”

James smirked, “I know I am so selfish to be neglecting him so badly.”

This made Regulus crack a bit of a smile, which James took as a sign the fight was over. So when
he stepped in close to Regulus and put his hands on his waist he was not expecting the harsh glare
from the boy in front of him, “What?”

“You seriously think our discussion is over now? You didn't even say sorry.”

James let out a dramatic sigh, “Alright I am sorry that I pranked you Reg. I will never do it again
without warning you.”

Regulus, who still had James’s hands on his waist nodded slightly, but when James leaned in to
kiss him he moved his head to the side. James caught Regulus’s jawbone with his lips, although he
was a bit embarrassed by the miss he continued kissing down Regulus’s neck.
“And what exactly do you think you are doing?”

James pulled back slightly and in a strangely whiny voice said, “But I apologized. Come on Reg
we don't get to meet up tonight. Why don't we enjoy the time we have?”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’s actions, “You are such an idiot sometimes. I want you to be
fairer with your pranks.”

James fully pulled back now and looked Regulus in the eyes, startled. He paused, thinking things
over, before responding, “ Alright I will make sure the next prank we pull won't be on Slytherin.”

Regulus raised an eyebrow wanting more. James sighed and continued, “Okay fine the next prank
will be on Gryffindor then, I promise.”

Regulus smiled slightly and leaned closer to James so that their lips were only a few inches apart,
“It better be a good one then.”

James smiled widely at the mischief in Reg’s voice, “Oh I can assure you it will be. I might even
be open to suggestions if you have any.”

Regulus laughed this time, “Not a chance. Your house, your prank. I don't want the blame.”

They were still close and James whispered his response, “ You think I would rat you out?”

Regulus whispered back in the same teasing tone as James, “Oh I know you would.”

James couldn't take the tension anymore and slammed his lips against Regulus’s. Regulus
responded just as quickly and he reveled in the intensity of the kiss. By this time James and he had
kissed many times but Regulus couldn't help but feel butterflies every time they did.

He knew that it was embarrassing and that he really shouldn't feel excited to kiss James Potter. He
also knew that he forgave the arsehole way too quickly, but he couldn't help it. He was a bit
addicted to the feeling of James against him.
They spent the rest of their time before James’s Marauder meeting, snogging in the broom
cupboard.

******************************************************************************************

Peter

Peter Pettigrew was not the best at school. He really tried his best, but for some reason, things
never clicked for him. Now he wasn’t the worst student in his year by far but he certainly wasn’t
the best. He probably only felt bad about his lack of academic prowess because all his friends were
very intelligent.

Remus and Lily were at the top of their year, while Sirius and James could get O’s without much
studying, and Marlene and Mary were very bright as well. He always tried his best though, which
he thought should count for something.

Remus had been hosting studying sessions in the library since the fourth year and Peter hardly ever
missed a meeting. James and Sirius never came to these, but Dorcas and Mary would usually sit
next to him. As much as he loved the other Marauders, he thought it was easier to study with the
girls. They didn't tease him about the things he didn't know and they always smiled at him when he
got an answer right.

Lately, though the girls did like to tease him about his relationship with Magdalene Reese. Today
was no different, except for some reason Marlene had decided to join today's study session.

Peter dropped his books on the table and slumped in his chair next to Mary, “Remind me again
why the subject of Astronomy exists.”

Mary laughed at him and in a teasing tone said, “Only to torture you, dear Pete.”

He rolled his eyes at Mary and then turned to Dorcas on his other side, and was shocked to see
Marlene sitting next to her. Marlene never came to Remus’s study sessions. She always said that
they were a waste of a good afternoon that she could spend playing quidditch.

Peter secretly always thought that was a little silly considering how cold it was getting lately, then
again Peter was never much into quidditch. He certainly enjoyed watching quidditch but to be
frank he never had any talent or inclination towards the game. Not like James and Sirius did
anyways, especially James.
That's where James was now, on the pitch. He had told Peter that he should bring Sirius to the
study group since he was going to be on the pitch this afternoon. Apparently, the marauders were
going to have a boy's night and James wanted to make sure he was thoroughly exhausted from
quidditch for it.

When Peter had asked Sirius if he had wanted to come to the study group with him, Sirius had
rolled his eyes and told Peter to get real. Peter thought that it wouldn't be a bad thing for Sirius to
come to the meeting, though if he did, Peter probably wouldn't get his astronomy done.

Peter knew he must have been looking at Marlene oddly because she suddenly snapped, “What?”

Peter blushed, he wasn't sure why, but he felt embarrassed for looking at Marlene too wrong. Don't
get him wrong he certainly doesn't have a crush on her or any of their girl friends but he didn't want
to give her that idea either. He could just see Sirius teasing him for “drooling” over Sirius’s ex-
girlfriend, “Sorry I was just surprised to see you here. Not a good day for flying?’

Marlene rolled her eyes annoyed about something, “No unfortunately it is a great day for flying,
but Hufflepuff has the pitch booked all afternoon.”

“What? James said he was going to be practicing all afternoon,” Why had James lied to him? Why
would he tell Peter he was at quidditch practice and why did he want Peter to bring Sirius to the
study group? What was James up to?

Marlene either wasn't surprised or didn't care, because she just shrugged, “Anyways Dorcas
mentioned that she went to this study group every week and I thought I'd check it out.”

Peter nodded as if Marlene's sudden interest made any sense. He knew for a fact that Marlene
knew that all her friends went to this meeting every week. He had even heard Remus invite her
personally. Why was she acting as if this was a new thing?

Mary leaned over and whispered to Peter as Dorcas and Marlene broke into their own conversation,
“Bloody weird, isn't it? Her sudden desire to go to this.”

Peter whispered back hoping that Marlene didn't hear, “Yeah it is a bit strange. Especially when
you used to beg her to come with you.”
“Exactly my thoughts, what do you reckon is going on?”

Peter glanced at Marlene, he notices her hair was done rather nicely and she had a bit more makeup
on than usual, “You don't think she’s here because she has a crush on someone, do you?

Mary’s eyes widened in sudden understanding, “Oh my god Peter, that's it! Who do you think it
is?”

Peter didn't know but he had the sudden urge to find out. He didn't know why but he loved getting
to the bottom of things. Gossip, mysteries, intrigue it didn't really matter because Peter always had
to know the answer. He knew he had a bit of reputation for knowing gossip, but he didn't really
mind that.

As he once read in a muggle book of sorts that those who merely sit by the phone waiting for it to
ring will always be waiting, while those who go out and find the information themselves have
something to say when it rings. At least that's how he thought it went and while he didn't know
what a phone was or why it would need to ring he always thought that quote was poetic for his
life.

Just as Peter was about to respond Marlene questioned them, “What are you guys whispering
about?”

Mary, his hero, jumped in, “Astronomy. Peter dreads that subject above all else.”

“Oh my god, me too. Why do I care what certain stars are called and why?” Dorcas was staring
down at her star chart in dismay, Peter couldn't agree more.

“Oh, I don't know its kind of fun to know some of them. Like Sirius!” Marlene said pointing to the
star that, she must've thought was Sirius.

Peter giggled a bit and then was embarrassed by that involuntary sound, “It’s actually this one.”

He guided her finger down to the star Sirius, “Peter I thought you were rubbish at Astronomy. How
do you know that?”
Peter smirked at her, “Well Sirius is my best friend and he never ever shuts up about which star is
his. I must've had it pointed out a million times.”

Mary laughed at the dumbstruck expression on Marlene’s face, “Gee I wonder why they broke
up?”

Marlene blushed a deep red and glanced slightly at Dorcas who was smirking slightly. Peter
wondered why Marlene would be embarrassed for Dorcas to hear that, everyone knew about her
and Sirius.

He considered asking about it until Marlene blurted out, “So Pete any other stars you know?”

Peter looked at her curiously, since when did she care about the stars so much. He shrugged it off
and chalked it up to female insanity, then he pointed to another star, “Well this one is the star of
Regulus.”

The girls’ heads all snapped to attention when he said the name, it would have been comical if it
hadn't been so concerning. Dorcas broke the silence, “And how do you remember that one Pete?”

Peter rolled his eyes, he had thought it would be obvious, “Well obviously from Sir-.”

Just as Peter was about to say his name, the devil slammed his books on the table next to Remus,
who was at the end of the table. Why the hell was Sirius here? He always said he would die before
spending an afternoon with Remus’s geek squad. Which Peter took great offense to.

He couldn't help himself asking Sirius, even though he was probably a bit far away, “What are you
doing here?”

“Shhh,” Madam Pince seemed to have a radar detector in that library for whenever things got
above a certain register.

Sirius chuckled slightly at Peter's flushed face, he absolutely hated getting shh’d, “What do you
mean Wormy? Isn't this an open group?”

Peter rolled his eyes at Sirius playing dumb, “Yeah but you've never come before.”
Before Sirius could respond Remus jumped into the conversation, “Pete your a bit far to be trying
to talk to Sirius. We don't want Madam Pince to come back do we?”

At Peter's shiver he continued, “If everyone would like to get back to work, there will be no more
interruptions I promise.”

As he said this last sentence he pointedly glared at Sirius who grinned back and pulled up a chair
right next to Remus. Peter tried to go back to focusing on his astronomy homework but he couldn't
stop thinking about why Sirius was there.

He hated feeling out of the loop. He wasn't proud of this but thought it was necessary, he used an
eavesdropping spell. It was one his mother used to use on his older sister and he had never told the
other marauders about it.

He had his wand under the table, pointed towards the two boys, and whispered, “Verinium.”

Suddenly it felt as if he had Sirius and Remus in his brain, he could hear their conversation so well.
To not seem suspicious he looked back at his star chart as he heard Sirius say, “What’s your
problem? What's wrong with me being here?”

Remus snapped back, “Nothing wrong with it. Except you've told both Pete and me that you would
never come.”

Sirius made a scoffing sound, “I never said that.”

“Bullshit. You told Peter this afternoon that you wouldn't go. Actually, you laughed in his face
when he suggested it. So why are you here?”

“Okay so I didn't plan on coming to this stupid group, but I am here now. Cant we just move on
and start studying?”

“You despise studying. Why are you here?”

Sirius made a frustrated sound in the back of his thought, “Fine I was bored, okay?”

“You were bored? So you came to the library to study?”

Peter could practically hear the eye-roll in Sirius’s voice, “Listen James was busy at some prefect
thing, and you and Pete were gone. And I just thought it would be a good time for you to show me
that book you keep mentioning.”

Peter didn't particularly remember any book that Remus mentioned and James was at a prefect
meeting?

“Sirius now is not the time for me to show you that. I told you that I would show you tomorrow
night if you still wanted to meet?”

“Oh yeah, I forgot. Well okay then you can show me that tomorrow night and we can just chat
now.”

Remus groaned, “Sirius we are studying. This isn't a gossip club.”

“Fine, but I-.”

Peter's spell was cut off when Mary began talking to him, “Hey Peter did you get your herbology
homework done?”

Dorcas laughed slightly, “Come on Mary, you know that's always the first thing Peter gets done.
That’s why he's the best in the year.”

Peter smiled at the compliment. He had plenty of shortcomings especially academically, but he had
always been good at Herbology. It was nice to have one subject where his friends would ask him
for help instead of the other way around.

Marlene joined in, “Oh but maybe he’s been distracted by something lately?”
Peter looked at her confused when Dorcas chuckled slightly, “That might just be the case,
Marlene.”

What the hell were they talking about? Mary giggled slightly before turning towards Pete, “Oh
right I forgot he probably was too busy to think about mandrakes when he had his tongue down his
girlfriend's throat.”

“Eww, why do you have to be so graphic Mary?” Dorcas shivered slightly in apparent disgust.

Marlene put her arm around Dorcas in what Peter assumed was a comforting way, “Unfortunately
my dear Dorcas. Peter and Magdalene have subjected the rest of us to that very action, many
times.”

Mary laughed, “Yes they certainly have. But it isn't any worse than what Sirius and you used to
do.”

Marlene glared slightly, “Oh, and what about you and Hunter Griffen. Or Alex Preston, Oh or
Miles Dent.”

Mary’s eyes got wide and the girls instantly started a whispered argument that Peter didn't care
enough to pay attention to. He enjoyed being with Magdalene too much to be bothered by their
teasing anyways.

He began thinking about secrets and explanations. The things that had been weighing on him since
he came to the study group.

Like why the hell was Marlene here? And why didn't she sit by her best friend Mary when there
was an open spot on the other side of her.

Why did James lie about having quidditch practice today? And why did he want the other
marauders out of the way today? Come to think of it, James had told Sirius that he had a prefect
meeting too. Which was obviously a lie since Lily Evans was here like always and she would
never miss a prefect meeting.

Why had Sirius decided to come to the study group even if he was bored? He had never done it
before. Also what book were he and Remus talking about and why were they meeting tomorrow
night?
There were so many unanswered questions about his friends and Peter hated not knowing
information. He wondered if he could get one of them to spill their secrets if he had tantalizing
enough information to trade them. Information was the most valuable form of currency in his
opinion.

He knew one thing for sure. He was going to discover what his friends were hiding.
 A Concerned Mother
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Regulus

As soon as he saw the snowy owl his stomach plummeted. As his stomach did every time he saw
this owl. There was nothing particularly wrong with Galvindi, but the owl was his parent's favorite
owl to send Regulus. The letter was either from his father or his mother and whether it was the
former or latter case, it didn't make him very happy.

He knows he should be happy that they are writing to him. That they cared enough to send their
son a letter in their busy schedules, but he couldn't deny that the letters never failed to make him
feel worthless. He wasn't sure if that was their goal or not, but if it was they always hit their mark.

Letters from his father were nonexistent until he became the heir of the family. In fact, his father
essentially ignored him completely before he became heir. Now the letters he sent Regulus were
chock-full of the physical, financial, and social duties he had to run the family. These letters, while
better than his mother's, always resulted in his stress.

Letters from his mother were much much worse. They were stomach ache-inducing. They made
him distressed, anxious, and a little frightened. They often included threats, ones that she wouldn't
hesitate to follow through on.

When the snowy owl landed in front of him he had just enough time to hope that the letter was
from his father, before Barty untied the letter and fed the owl a piece of toast. Barty must've
noticed the way Regulus froze and the slightly shocked look on his face.

Barty silently slid the letter in front of Regulus and patted him on the back in an attempt at a
comforting way. Regulus was grateful for the attempt although it did make him feel a little
uncomfortable. That wasn't Barty’s fault though, Regulus was just raised without a lot of touches so
he wasn't used to it. Barty knew how Regulus’s parents could be.

Barty also had issues with his parents, well mostly just his dad. At least Barty had a mother who
loved him and cared for him. Regulus sometimes felt himself become overcome with jealousy of
the mother-son relationship his best friend had. He tried not to dwell on those feelings though. It's
not like he could change who his family was.
He decided not to open the letter right away, he didn't want it to ruin his entire day, but it sort of
did anyway. He had shoved the letter in his bag and continued about his day like normal. Except
that all he could think about the entire day was that letter. The neat handwriting on the front
spelling Regulus Arcturus Black, made him sweat with anticipation. It was from his mother.

Later in the day, he found himself secluded in the library during his allotted study session. Not
studying, but instead preparing himself to read the letter. He knew he should read it after his
session and should spend this time studying, but he simply couldn't wait any longer. He needed to
know what it said and he knew he would get no studying done until he did.

He felt the crisp paper in between his clammy fingers and he turned it over to see the wax seal with
his family's crest imprinted in it. The words Toujours Pur scrawled below. He broke the seal with a
wave of his finger and opened the letter. Pulling out the parchment that read;

Regulus,

Why have we not heard from you in weeks, you ungrateful boy? What are you up to that has
distracted you from writing to your parents? You better not be up to the same nonsense the blood
traitor was. If we find out that you were…. There will be grave consequences. I choose to believe
that you are intelligent enough to realize that and that the reason you have not written to us is that
you were enveloped in your studies, that better be the case. I expect you to be working as hard as
you can towards your OWLs. I expect all O’s, Regulus. Do not disappoint me.

I heard from a little bird that you lost your first quidditch game to that blood traitor Potter, how
embarrassing. If you insist on playing that ridiculous game the least you could do is be talented at
it. You know how your father and I hate mediocrity.

Remember to align yourself with the right people, Regulus. We won't have any more mistakes.

-Walpurga Viance Black

Regulus set the letter down, feeling empty. He almost wished it was a letter from his father.
Although that would have stressed him out, it wouldn't have made him feel so worthless. At least it
would have made him feel like somebody was counting on him rather than being chastised like a
child.

He wished he could tell her that she was wrong. That he was good at Quidditch and he had talent.
That he was studying and he had studied so hard for her that had nearly broken him. He couldn't
though, it would absolutely not end well. That would just prove the professors, Sirius, and James
right. That his parents didn't have his best interest at heart and that they didn't care about him
beyond his worth to the family name. He couldn't believe that because they were his family. They
were as flesh and blood and if they weren't there for him, nobody would be.
He found himself leaving his studying session earlier than he planned. He never did that, he
usually stayed until Madam Pince had to tell him his study session was over. She gave him a
curious glance when she saw him leaving before she returned to shelving books.

Even though he was only allowed a certain amount of time to study, he still tried his hardest to
make his parents proud at that time. To study as much and as hard as he possibly could. To make
sure he got perfect grades and that he was ready for the OWL’s. This was probably the reason that
even though he had multitudes of free time now, he still felt stressed out most of the time.

He felt so pressured to make his parents proud, even though he knew it would never be good
enough for them. They would never look at him and tell him they were proud of him. Regulus
couldn't stop thinking about the last line of the letter, about how they wouldn't allow any more
mistakes. It was obviously referring to Sirius and that they would accept Regulus’s failure like they
did his older brother.

Regulus had noticed that his parents never said Sirius’s name anymore. They only ever called him
the blood traitor. How could they do that? How they could separate the son they had from the
blood traitor they knew now. They did somehow though, they never touched his room, even
though they did blast him off the wall. All his stuff was still sitting up in his room collecting dust
as if it was a shrine to the son they had before. As if he was dead to them, maybe he was, but not to
Regulus.

During the summer Regulus sometimes found himself going into his brother's room and just sitting,
pretending his brother was just downstairs and he was waiting for him. It was pathetic, he knew
that, but he did it anyway. He knew his brother had screwed him over. He had left him, and in
doing that he had doomed Regulus to the life of the Black heir. He would never get to choose a
career, a wife, or a house. Instead, he would do what was expected of him, for the rest of his life.

Regulus felt like doing something out of character, other than leaving his study session early. He
wanted to show emotion. He wanted to scream, he wanted to get angry, and he wanted to cry in
front of everyone. He knew that would not go over well and that he needed to get away from
everyone. He needed to be alone.
He sprinted out into the grounds and found himself in front of the Black Lake before he even knew
where he was going. He found himself an old willow tree, not far from the lake, and sat down
against the trunk.

Almost immediately he put his head in his hands and his knees pulled up to his chest and let
himself cry. Actually, he sobbed, feeling the involuntary wracks go through his body as he tried to
catch his breath.

While he had shed a few tears throughout the years, he hadn't let himself really cry since he was ten
years old and his mother told him that his brother was a disgrace to the family and had been sorted
into Gryffindor.

***************************************************************************

It was about supper time if the sun's placement was anything to go by and Regulus had long
stopped crying. He could feel the trace of the tear tracks still on his face, though he was sure they
were no longer detectable.

He was frankly embarrassed by the little temper tantrum he had thrown. He could only hope that
no one had seen him running through the corridors like a fool. And he would be absolutely
mortified if anyone found out that he was out here crying all afternoon.

He couldn't believe how pathetic he was. I mean how weak do you have to be to have a mental
breakdown from a half-page letter from your mother. He knew his parents would be so ashamed of
him if they knew, well more than they already were.

Sirius would probably find him pathetic too. Regulus was sure he never had a breakdown over a
letter from their parents. He probably just laugh it off and move on, but Regulus never had as tough
of skin as Sirius. Regulus wondered when the last time Sirius received a letter from their mother
was. Was it last year or had it been years since she deigned to pay any attention to her screw-up of
a firstborn?

Regulus sort of wished that he still had Sirius to take the brunt of his parent's attention. He knew
that was selfish but he had spent so much of his life with little to no attention from them, the full
brunt of it overwhelmed him. It never seemed to overwhelm Sirius, though.

Regulus felt like he was being pulled in ten different directions at the same time like he was a doll
two kids wanted to play with at the same time so they kept tugging at him. His parents were telling
him that he needed to study constantly, while his professors were telling him that he needed to be
stress-free. His friends were telling him he needed to align himself with the dark lord while James
was telling him, he didn't have to do anything he didn't want to. Sirius was telling him that he
needed to be careful with his life and his brain was telling him there was no point in that anymore.
He didn't know what to think and he certainly didn't know what to do.

He knew he should write back his mother, but he really didn't want to. He didn't even know what to
say to her. Maybe Yes, mother. Whatever you say, mother. That's what he usually said, as he would
do almost anything to appease her and to avoid her wrath. Merlin forbid he responded with
opinions or thoughts of his own.

She would be furious if he did that. That was one thing Sirius never understood, while their mother
was insane, she was easy to understand. She just wanted a doormat and a son that would say yes
ma'am. Instead, she got Sirius who had nothing but attitude and opinions, she was just lucky she
decided to have a backup plan.

Regulus was starting to wish he'd brought his book bag with him, instead of running off without it.
All he could think about at the time was getting away from everyone and everything. People
probably were looking for him now.

He had skipped out early on his study session and had missed an entire mealtime. The professors
would probably be furious with him. Not to mention his friends were probably wondering where
he’d gone off to as well, considering he missed quidditch practice. Mulciber would probably be
livid, but Regulus couldn't find it in himself to care.

Maybe everyone thought had hidden away to study or something. He was sure people would
believe it, even though he knew he wasn't that pathetic. As loathsome as he was to admit it James
was right, Regulus didn't exactly need to study a bunch to get good grades and to do well on his
OWL exams.

And he certainly was loathsome to admit that James Potter was ever right about anything. Regulus
and James had a very different relationship than they did before this year started. James still drove
him fucking crazy, but for some reason instead of wanting to punch him in that face, he wanted to
stick his tongue in his mouth instead.

Regulus knew this was not a good sign, but he found he didn't want to explore why he forgave
James so fast when he made him mad. He was, however, a bit embarrassed for how quick he had
forgiven James a couple weeks ago when the marauders had performed that hideous prank on him.
Especially after he had ranted and rampaged in his head about how much he hated James and the
next thing he knew they were snogging.

Regulus struggled to stay serious sometimes around James, which is something he had never
struggled with before. James would flirt and flash him a cheesy grin and Regulus would melt like
butter. Not that he would ever tell James that. James was charming, to say the least. Actually, he
was probably the most charming man Regulus had ever met. He knew that people often called
Sirius charming, but Regulus never saw it that way.

When they were younger, Regulus always thought his brother was fun and interesting, but never
charming. James definitely was, though. He was so effortlessly charming that sometimes it made
Reg queasy.
Regulus had never realized the extent of James’s charm until he and James began seeing each
other. In fact, he often found himself staring at James from across the hall just watching him
transfix those around him. He even had to be nudged out of his own daze by Evan more than a few
times.
James Potter wasn't anything special. He was just a boy. A stupid reckless boy. Regulus wasn't
even sure he was inclined towards boys, yet he was inclined to James Potter. That much he had to
admit, considering the things that had been getting up to together lately. As much as Regulus hated
to admit it, James Potter the boy who he had hated since he first heard his name, was the man he
found the most attractive.

Regulus still hated him though. He hated him because he stole Sirius away from him. He hated
James because he had a perfect life and was so effortlessly charming. He hated him because he was
a blood traitor. The biggest reason Regulus hated James was that he had gotten under the young
boy's skin, and Regulus wasn't sure how he had let his guard down enough to allow that.

Regulus figured James must've found him attractive in some way too, otherwise, he wouldn't bother
snogging him every time they saw each other. To be quite honest Regulus wasn't really sure why
James would like him or find him attractive. He knew that he was handsome in an artificial way,
but it wasn't real.

Regulus was handsome in the way all Black family members were, it was a result of inbreeding
and genetic alterations. It ensure that the entire Black family would have a similar feature, enough
to make sure they were always beautiful. The dark black hair, the grey eyes, the pale skin, and the
long delicate fingers were all flawed because of their purpose. Or at least that's the way it felt to
Regulus.

He often thought about the family features and what they meant. It was actually sort of disgusting
if you thought about it long enough. Regulus wondered if James had stopped long enough to think
about why both his brother and him looked the way they did. Regulus hoped James wasn't
oblivious to believe they had just been blessed with their features.

His ancestors had made sure he would look the way he did and it disgusted him. Sometimes he
looked in the mirror and all he saw was his mother or father and he felt sick. Regulus wasn't sure
why he wanted James to be aware of Regulus’s looks, he certainly wanted the boy to be attracted to
him, but he also didn't want the boy to believe a lie.

James Potter definitely wasn't designed to have specific features. He wasn't regal and he was far
from perfect. He was not artificial in any way and it relived Regulus. He had a square jaw, terrible
eyesight, ridiculously messy hair, and one of his arms was slightly shorter than the other. Yet
Regulus thought he was one of the most handsome men he’d ever seen. He was probably the
definition of a walking disaster, but Regulus couldn't help but stare at him sometimes.
Regulus was a bit humiliated by his own thought on James Potter. HE was a man and a man is not
supposed to go about how his smile is like poetry, whether they are homosexual or not. Regulus
knew that he was probably doomed at this point.

He was way too comfortable with James, for them to have been hanging out for such a short time.
It hadn't even been a full month yet and Regulus felt like he could really talk to James. They had
been meeting up more and more lately, so much that it had almost become a daily thing. They
would sneak down to the Honeydukes cellar, or climb up the astronomy tower, find an abandoned
classroom, or maybe a broom cupboard, sometimes they even went down to the quidditch pitch
together at night.

Anyplace and anytime they could find to spend time together. Most of the time these encounters
would involve snogging and whatever else they felt like, but sometimes they would just talk. This
was a new experience for Regulus because he definitely was not a talker. He felt comfortable
enough to take to James, though. Not really about anything too serious or heavy, but just about life.

James would often talk about his classes and what pranks the marauders were planning next. Or he
would ask Regulus about his classes and his friends. Regulus had never really had someone
interested in his life or wanted to know what he did every day. James always seemed interested,
though, and would often ask questions. It made Regulus feel warm inside every time he asked a
new question.

Just after supper time, Regulus was on his third cigarette, when a voice said behind him, “I was
wondering where you scampered off to.”

Regulus turned around and saw James Potter standing there in a Puddlemere United sweatshirt and
jeans. He looked like a complete muggle, besides the wand sticking out of his pocket. Weirdly,
Regulus thought he looked kind of cute, “Scampered? What am I a dog?”

This made James laugh a little harder than Regulus found necessary, “Well, I suppose YOU
aren't.” He came and sat beside Regulus on the grass, looking out to the lake with him. Before
turning to Regulus and continuing, “I didn't know you smoked.”

Regulus rolled his eyes before taking another drag of his cigarette blowing the smoke in James’s
direction, “Obviously I do.”

James wrinkled his nose and waved the smoke away from his face, ”It's a nasty habit. I would have
thought you smarter than that, Reggie.”

Regulus chuckled humorlessly, “Smarter than what? Everybody smokes, James.”

“Yeah, everyone who has a death wish. Come on, you know those things are terrible for you, don't
you?”

“Why do you think I'm smoking them?”

James suddenly got a pitying expression on his face, that Regulus wanted to slap right off again,
“So why are you out here?”

“Why did you come looking for me?”

“Well, I thought that your friends looked a little pathetic without you standing next to him. Right
trolls, they are. You are definitely the eye candy of the group.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Sure Potter because all the girls say that Barty is a troll. That's why they
stick their tongues in his mouth.”

James wrinkled his nose at that, “Don't tell me that Crouch gets girls. Come on, I thought women
had better taste.”

“Well they do, when it comes to you. That's why you're never around women.”

James rolled his eyes, “Maybe it's because I've been around men lately instead or one specific man.
Besides, I've been with women before.”

“But you've never dated them.”

“Somehow I doubt Crouch has actually ever dated them either.”

“Well, you are right about that one.”

James gave him a cocky smirk, “I usually am.”

Regulus shot him a quick glare, “Don't push your luck, Potter.”

“Oh I see we're back to calling each other by our surnames again, are we? Lately, you been calling
me James.”

“Well, lately you've been distracting me, but I'm back to my mission to avoid using your first
name, Potter.”

“I prefer when you call me James, Black.” Then James sent him a wicked grin and said his own
name in a breathy gasp, “Or you could call me JAMES.”

Regulus blushed a bit at James’s attempt to mimic Regulus’s voice from their last meeting. He did
not sound like that at all.

He shot James an unimpressed look, “Of course you do, but I'm not in the mood right now.”

James frowned at him slightly, “I can see that. What's wrong, Reg?”

Regulus considered if he should explain the whole situation to James, he considered telling James
to fuck off too, but he didn't actually want James to leave. He had been by himself all day. He had
cried, he had felt sorry for himself, and now he just wanted company. He didn't want to go into all
the details, so instead, he handed James the letter.

James took it, confused, “What's this?”

“Just read it.”

James unfolded it and began reading. It took him a bit longer than Regulus would have taken.
Regulus made a mental note to brag to James later about his reading speed.
Regulus noticed the facial expressions James was making while he was reading. He seemed angry
and shocked. Once he finished, James looked up to Regulus, “You've got to be kidding me. What
is this rubbish?”

“What do you think it is? It's just a reminder of who I am and who I must be for my family.”

“No, it's rubbish, is what it is. It's your bitch of a mother, once again, trying to control you.
Talentless? I've never heard so much bullshit in my life.”

“So that's the part that really resonated with you? That she called me talentless.”

“It was one of the many parts that really pissed me off, but you're one of the most talented boys I
know. You're smart as hell. You're great at Quidditch. How dare she treat you this way.”

Regulus felt a warming in his chest at those words, “Potter, this isn't even close to the worst letter
I've ever received from her.”

“I know. I used to read Sirius’s letters from her too. In fact, I used to hear them when she sent
howlers. Most of those were about how angry she was at him. But this...She's telling you who you
have to be and she's degrading you. She's expecting you not to fight back and you won't.”

Regulus felt as if he had been slapped, “Wh-What? You don't know that.”

“Yes, I do. You're not gonna fight back against her. If you were planning on it, you wouldn't be out
here all day after receiving a letter like this. You would be writing her back and telling her to stay
out of your business.”

“Yeah, because that would go over well. She would drag me out of Hogwarts and send me to
Durmstrang before I even had the letter posted.”

“She never did that to Sirius.”

“She wanted to believe me, but she never had to because she always had a backup plan. And that
was me so there is no plan C. I am it, I have no options. I have to workout or she’s screwed.”
“I hate that you're referring to yourself as a backup plan or a plan in general. You're a child and
she's never treated you like one, has she?”

Regulus hated that James could see right through him, “She both doesn't, she does. She treats me
like a child in the way that she wants to control me. But she also doesn't treat me like I'm her child.
I guess that's the easiest way to put it. I've never told anybody that. Don't spread that around.”

“You've never told anybody that your mother is a terrible person?”

“I've never admitted to anyone that I am the backup plan. That I was born as a just in case and I've
always been treated like a just in case child.”

James looked heartbroken for Regulus, “Oh, Regulus. I'm so sorry that your parents are like this,
but you know, you don't have to be there-.”

Regulus interrupted James, “ I don't want to talk about that. I just wanted you to know why I'm
upset. Why I am out here.”

James nodded, looking as if he wanted to say something else, but he didn't and Regulus was
grateful for it. Instead, he reached into his pocket and handed Regulus a chocolate frog.

Regulus stared down at the treat in his hand confused“What's this?”

“Well, considering I didn't see you at supper. I figured you were hungry. I know it's not much, but
something to tide you over, right?”

Regulus looked at the frog a bit confused. James had brought him a snack because he had noticed
Regulus wasn't at his meal time and he thought Regulus might be hungry? James had actually
thought about what Regulus might need before he came looking for him. He started to feel rather
warm inside his body. The thought of somebody feeling like they needed to take care of him was
strangely welcome.

“Thank you, James”

“We’re back to James then, can't say I'm too upset about it.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, not bothering to respond.

“So why this spot? Why are you out here?”

Regulus looked around, ”I'm not really sure. After I got the letter, I just needed to be away from
everyone and I ran and my feet just kind of carried me here.”

“Well, it's really nice, I like it.”

“Yeah, it is.” Regulus was only really realizing this now. He'd been too busy thinking his own
thoughts before.

“You know this could be our spot.”

Regulus snapped his head back at James, “Our spot?”

“Yeah, you know like people have songs that relate to that, their relationship, or spots they like to
go and-.”

Regulus interrupted James, “We aren't in a relationship. Why would we have a spot?”

James rolled his eyes, “I know that, Reggie. I'm just saying if we were, then this could be it. It's
beautiful and it would be pretty romantic I suppose. If I had the right person next to me.”

“You're such an idiot, James. Nobody's gonna want to come out here with you during this time of
year. It's freezing.”

“Well, you're out here with me.”

“That's because I was out here before you got here and now that you're here I kind of want to
leave.”

James laughed, “I am sure Reg.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at the sound of James’s goofy laugh, “Actually, I don't mind the cold. I've
always preferred it to heat. It's nice to be a little chilled while looking at the sunset, don't you
think?”

James looked at the sunset too, “Yeah it is. I don't mind the heat, but the cold has something nice
about it too.”

Then James did something that freaked out Regulus. He reached over and put his hand on Regulus'
hand that was sitting in the grass between them. Not holding it, but just placing it over his own
hand. Regulus felt his eyes widen and he looked at James and he was greeted with a smirk, but
silence. They both turned back to the sunset, neither of them daring to move.

That is, until about five minutes later when Regulus felt a hankering for another cigarette. His last
one had gone out soon after James had arrived. So he reached to the pack sitting on the grass next
to him, chuckling slightly when he saw the look of distaste on James's face. He decided he wanted
to show off a little bit.

He was a bit proud of this trick that Barty had taught him. In one hand he held the cigarette to his
mouth and in the other, he waved his hand in front of the bud and it lit.

James gaped at him, wide-eyed, “Merlin Reg, that was bloody wicked.”

Regulus smirked, a bit feeling proud that he had impressed James and then feeling embarrassed
that he'd been proud to have impressed James Potter of all people.

“How do you learn how to do that?”

“Barty.”
“Eww, but nevertheless you've convinced me.”

Regulus exhaled before asking, “Convinced you?”

“Yep, with that badass trick, you've convinced me to do something I told myself I would never do.
Try a cigarette.”

Regulus cocked his head at James, “I thought you hated cigarettes. You haven't tried it before?”

“No, of course not. Bloody disgusting habit, they are. Plus they stink to high heaven. You don't
know how many times I've asked your brother and Remus not to smoke in the dorms and yet they
always do.”

“Sirius smokes?”

“Yep, he started smoking when Remus did. He thought Remus was so bloody cool when he did. I
thought it was bloody ridiculous that a 14-year-old was smoking, but it made your brother want to
take it up.”

“Well I'm 15 and I smoke.”

“And I think your bloody ridiculous too, Reggie.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Okay here.”

He handed James the cigarette after he took a long drag.

James looked at it warily, but he took it in his hand anyways. The way he looked at it was quite
amusing to Regulus like he thought it was going to reach out and bite his face or something.

“What do I do?”
“Well, you put it in your mouth, not the lit side though.” Regulus received a glare from James
which caused Regulus to chuckle a bit before continuing, “You suck in and hold it in for a few
seconds and then you release the smoke by breathing out.”

James looked at him with wide eyes, “I have to hold the smoke in my mouth?”

“That's how you get a buzz, genius.”

“Oh, I'm sorry that I'm not a delinquent, like you.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Just do it already.”

James did and for about 2 seconds, Regulus thought he looked extremely hot with the smoke
curling between his fingers and around his lips. That is until he started coughing, loudly. As soon
as he caught his breath, he pushed the cigarette away from him into Regulus’s hand and looked at
him as if he had betrayed him.

“That was bloody terrible, the way it burned. Why do you guys like that?”

Regulus laughed at him, ”Guess we're just used to it, but I have to tell you, as much as you hated
that you looked bloody sexy for a second there.”

James looked at him, a bit shocked and Regulus knew why. He usually didn't give James
compliments. James, on the other hand, preferred to shower Regulus with compliments during their
meetings. Regulus had never said one to James, though. He wasn't sure why, it probably had
something to do with the way he was raised, but he didn't have time to psychoanalyze it. He was
too busy reveling in the look James was giving him.

Once James gained his composure, he had the largest grin on his face when he said, “Really? Who
knew all it took was me getting cancer to make Regulus Black think I'm sexy?”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Yeah and I guess since you've vowed not to smoke. It will never happen
again.”
 James laughed, “If that's your way of trying to convince me to take another try. Then you are
preaching to the wrong crowd. That was a truly terrible experience.”

Regulus pouted at him, playfully, “Pity.”

James winked at him, “Well, you should at least be happy in the knowledge that as many times as
Remus and Sirius have tried to convince me to smoke with them, you're the first and last person I'll
ever smoke with. Doesn't that make you feel special?”

“Oh Potter, you really have no idea how much?”

James laughed at his sarcastic tone before turning back towards the lake. Regulus did the same and
was shocked a bit to see the sun was nearly down. Sooner than, rather than later it would be very
dark and they wouldn't be able to see a thing.

Regulus didn't know if he had the energy to go deal with his friends' questions at the moment, but
he knew we'd have to. It's not like he could sit at the Black Lake all night

Regulus resigned himself for a long night of probing questions from Barty and idiotic questions
from Evan, that is until James gave him another option.

“So I am feeling quite famished, I ended up skipping out early at dinner when I realized you
weren't there. So are you interested in visiting the kitchens with me? I'm sure you’d like more than
that chocolate frog too.”

Regulus smiled.

Chapter End Notes

Okay, I did have someone wondering if I have a posting schedule for this story and the
answer is that I do not. My goal is to post every week, but life does sometimes get
hectic. So in that case then it sometimes might be two weeks before I update. I do not
have a specific day I post on, it's pretty much whenever I finish editing. Hope
everyone enjoying the story!
 The Room of Requirement

James

James had been to the kitchen hundreds of times. He had been there for pranks, for marauder
sustenance during late-night planning, and to find snacks after a late quidditch practice that caused
him to miss dinner. He could be blindfolded and still know exactly where he was. The kitchen
always smelled of savory pot roast and basil, James loved pot roast. There was always the quiet but
consistent noise of dishes being washed, and food being prepared. In short, James was very
familiar with the kitchen.

Or at least he thought he was until he went there with Regulus Black.

The kitchens with Regulus Black were an entirely different experience from going with the
marauders. Usually, James and his friends would request a load of food they probably wouldn't
finish and then chat amongst themselves until the elves brought it to them, then they would leave.
That was not what Regulus did.

As soon as the two boys entered the kitchen Regulus was greeted by a few elves as master Regulus,
where James was called sir. So James was pretty sure Regulus was familiar with them, and he was
certain the boy was when Regulus said each of the elves' names in greeting. James hadn't even
realized that Regulus was saying their names at first, he just thought Reg was speaking gibberish.
For some reason that made a whole lot more sense than Regulus being friendly with house-elves.

Sirius had always said that Regulus was very protective of the Black family house-elf, Kreacher.
James had always assumed that was because the elf had practically raised Regulus. God knows it
wasn't Walpurga that rocked him to sleep.

James was further shocked when Regulus requested two simple sandwiches and cups of hot
chocolate. That was it, he didn't ask for any sides or anything. Not that that bothers James, but he
had always assumed Regulus would be like Sirius, prone to food wastage. A product of their
wealth, which James had to admit he was guilty of too. But Regulus had ordered the bare
minimums for the two boys, obviously not wanting to trouble the elves with a complicated order.
James was slightly confused by that because the elves always seemed grateful to help, why would
they be bothered.

Then Regulus had actually said please, and when they received their food, thank you. James almost
felt his jaw drop. He had never heard a student say please when asking for something from a
house-elf. His mother was pretty polite when it came to their own house-elf Dorry, but she had
been in the family since before James was born. She was more family than a servant. Regulus
barely knew these elves, though, and he didn't know why but he just expected Regulus to be a part
of them.

It's not that James and his friends were rude to the house elves, not at all. In fact, they were
probably amongst the nicer students at Hogwarts when it came to the elves, but James had to admit
he didn't know a single elves name at this school.

When they sat down a couple of other elves came up and started to chat with Reggie. They asked
him about the books he was reading and quidditch. James was speechless, he honestly couldn't find
his words. How had he not known that Regulus was so close with the school elves? Scratch that,
how did nobody know about this?

When the elves brought over the food and waved goodbye to Regulus, James finally found his
words. They came out scratchy and perplexed, but he was just glad he managed to scramble his
brain together for the moment, “Uh... I am guessing you’ve been down here before.”

Regulus cocked his head at James curiously, “What tipped you off?”

James gaped at Regulus, wondering how stupid he thought James was. Then Regulus laughed at
James, “I am kidding James. It's pretty obvious I come here quite a bit.”

James wanted to be mad about Regulus’s teasing but with the boy laughing so carefree, he couldn't
be. Regulus didn't laugh very often, and when he did it was usually in derision, so James took a
second to enjoy the melody of Reg’s laugh before responding, “I just am surprised you are so
friendly with the house-elves.”

Regulus’s laugh stopped short and his face suddenly became serious, “And why exactly would that
surprise you.”

His tone was calm and steady but there was a sharp edge to his words. James wondered how he
could have possibly made Regulus mad in a few sentences. He backtracked. First, he said
something about Reg obviously having visited the kitchens before, but Regulus had teased James
after that so that couldn't be why he's mad. James hadn't responded to his teasing but Regulus had
laughed after that so James figured he wasn't mad about that. Then James had said something
about Regulus being friendly with the house-elves, but why would that make Regulus mad? Was
he not friendly with them? But Reg had known all their names and had greeted them like old
friends. So why was he mad at James for pointing out the obvious.
James didn't think that he would ever truly understand Regulus Black. The boy confused James
more than anyone but he was really trying to discern what would set him off and why, “Uh sorry
did I say something to upset you?”

Regulus rolled his eyes and then sighed deeply, “No I am sorry. I don't know why I get so
defensive about them, but yes I am friendly with the elves. They are really kind to me.”

“Reg, they are kind to everyone. They are elves, that's what they do.”

“And just because they're elves, they have to be kind to everyone. They have to be helpful and
friendly because otherwise, they're useless, right?”

“That is not what I'm saying, Reg. I'm just saying that-”

Regulus interrupted, “You're just saying that they don't have their own personalities, that they're all
the same, right? James, you know that they are a species of Magical creatures, right? In fact, a lot
of their magic is even more impressive than a wizard's magic and they have every right to be their
own people. But instead, they're subjected to slavery at the hand of Wizards.”

James was speechless. It's not that he had never thought about elf servitude, he had, but it was so
far away from his mind usually. His own house-elf, as he said before, was more like family than a
servant and somehow James had forgotten or more likely didn't want to think about the families
that didn't treat their house-elves like family. Families that would punish and beat their own house-
elves.

Families like the Blacks.

James wondered how Regulus had come to form his opinions on elf rights when it was clear his
parents had forced their own opinions on their son since the day he was born. Somehow Regulus’s
own views on elf rights had shone through his parents' conviction on the matter. He had no
problem telling James what he thought about the way elves were treated and James wished he
could speak that freely about all his opinions, he believed that Regulus would be much happier if
he did.

“Reg, that is not what I am saying at all. I just- I hadn't put much thought into elves if I am honest.
They're obviously different from us and I don't know if I fully agree that elves want to be just like
wizards, but I agree with you that the way they are treated is unacceptable.”
Regulus nodded and looked at James in a way that made him wonder briefly whether the Slytherin
was going to pick another fight. Apparently, he wasn't, “I don't think they want to be the same as
Wizards, I think that's a misconception that a lot of traditional wizards use to protest elf rights
movements. They don't want to be us and they certainly don't want to rule us. They probably don't
even want to necessarily be free, I know Kreacher doesn't want to be free. But there needs to be
regulations and consequences for those who violate them. I just….”

Regulus trailed off as if he just realized he was ranting and became embarrassed about it. James
didn't mind it, in fact, he sort of enjoyed watching Reggie become passionate about his beliefs.
James took a bite of his sandwich and tried to think of something he could say to reassure Regulus
that he agreed.

He didn't have a chance to find the words as Regulus continued, “It's terrible and disgusting. The
idea is that they are supposed to punish themselves for any kind of behavior deemed inappropriate
by wizards. It's absolutely sickening, don't get me wrong my parents are just as guilty. They are
terrible to Kreacher and there's not much I can do to stop them, but I wish I could.”

James looked at Regulus and could see that the boy was distraught that he couldn't do more, so he
decided to share his own experience with him, “In my house, my house elf Dorry is more like
family, I mean she's been with us since before I was born. Mum and her do the cooking and
cleaning together.”

Regulus looked at James with a lot more meaning than was probably necessary from the simple
detail about his life. Regulus looked at him in an intensely deep way before responding quietly,
“That's how I would like to live. That sounds perfect. I wish it was possible, it would make me
really happy.”

“Maybe you could have that, Reg. I mean it's not like you are going to be living with your parents
forever. Eventually, you are going to have your own household and you get to decide how you will
run it.”

“Unfortunately by that time, I will more than likely be saddled with some bitchy spoiled brat for a
wife. And somehow I doubt she’ll feel the same as me about elf rights.”

“Why would you choose a girl like that to marry?”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Come on James, don't be so naive. I wouldn't choose her, my parents
would.”

Regulus had said it as if it was obvious and James couldn't help but be dumbfounded at that
attitude, “Are you talking about an arranged marriage?”

“Yeah, obviously. Don't blood traitors do arranged marriages?”

James was a little bit shocked at being called a blood traitor to his face. Why would Regulus think
that James’s family would arrange his marriage from him? This is the seventies for Merlin’s sake.
Pureblood family or not, arranged marriages are positively medieval. He genuinely wanted to
know why Regulus would think that was normal, “Why would I have an arranged marriage?”

“You're a Pureblood. It's very common for Pureblood families to have arranged marriage contracts
to keep the family blood pure.”

“I don't think that's true anymore Reg. Maybe that's what they do in the sacred twenty-eight, but us
less divine purebloods would rather not marry our cousins to keep our line pure.”

Regulus looked a bit flustered, “You mean you won't keep your family line pure?”

```

James shook his head, “It's not that I am against marrying a pureblood, but if I did it certainly
wouldn't be to keep my bloodline pure. I don't really care who I marry, Reggie, I just plan on
marrying for love. That's how my parents raised me, to follow my heart and damn the
consequences.”

“Wow, your parents must really love you.”

“Well yeah of course. Plus they fell in love when they shouldn't have but it all worked out for
them.”

“That's kind of incredible. My parents have never loved each other. They would never tell me that
marrying for love is worth any consequences.”

“Yeah well, that's probably because they are first cousins. And if they had an arranged marriage,
then why shouldn't you?”

Regulus looked a bit embarrassed at the mention of his dubious lineage, “Uh yeah, I know they’re
not exactly the poster children for a happy arranged marriage. My aunt Druella, once told me that
my parents had hated each other as kids and they were furious when they were forced to marry. It
really does explain so much.”

“It really does,” James agreed wholeheartedly. Then he had a thought that made him shiver in
disgust, “Please tell me you wouldn't allow them to arrange a marriage for you with one of your
cousins.”

Regulus laughed loudly, “Don't worry, I will definitely put my foot down if they try to pull a stunt
like that. Luckily all my first cousins are all married, but if I see my mother staring too long at my
second cousin Arabel one more time, I am gonna lose it.”

James laughed heartily at Regulus’s disgusted expression and the boy's joke. Or at least he hoped it
was a joke.

The boys continued to eat their sandwiches and drink their hot chocolate, while idly chatting about
random things; James’s new broom that he thought he was getting for Christmas, Regulus joking
that James still wouldn't be able to beat him, and playful teasing about Regulus’s upcoming game
against Ravenclaw.

James enjoyed spending time with Regulus, he never thought he actually would. Regulus Black,
for all intents and purposes, had always seemed like he had a stick up his ass. He was nothing like
Sirius at all, besides their similar looks, they were polar opposites.

James found he really didn't care how different the two brothers were. He sort of liked Regulus’s
attitude and intelligence. It's not like Regulus was ever going to replace Sirius as James’s best
friend, in fact, James didn't think he could ever truly be friends with the boy, but he liked him. The
two Black brothers were different but James liked them both in their own way. Sirius was his
soulmate and partner in crime, while Reg was cute and interesting. James liked the way Regulus
was, he was so much more unique than he got credit for.

James wondered idly, why Sirius ever told him that Regulus was boring and that he had about as
much personality as a shoe brush when that was clearly not the case. Why had Sirius not wanted
James to get to know his younger brother? Was he afraid, in the back of his mind, that James would
actually like Regulus’s company? James wondered what Sirius would think if he knew that James
had gotten to know Regulus and was on his way to knowing the boy very well.
James knew in the back of his head that Sirius wouldn't be happy at all about James’s, for lack of a
better word, relationship with his brother. However, he still liked to humor himself and pretend that
Sirius would be happy for them. That he would be happy that his brother wasn't with some slimy
Slytherin git but instead with his very best friend. James knew he was dreaming if he thought that
was the response he would get from Sirius.

James genuinely enjoyed spending time with Regulus Black, so much so that he didn't want their
night to end. They had nearly finished their sandwiches and James was getting worried that Reg
would make a quick escape from him as soon as they finished. That was why he asked Regulus to
join him in the kitchen because he wanted to spend more time with him.

That's when it hit him, like a lightbulb going off in his head. The Room of Requirement was
perfect. It was a quiet place that didn't show up on the Marauders map and Regulus would love it.
He would be really interested in it, like he was the secret passageways and the cloak of invisibility.
James hoped Regulus would agree to join him, but he wouldn't be surprised if he was pushing his
luck by asking to spend more time together.

Regulus and he usually didn't spend more than a few hours together and he wasn't sure how the
Slytherin would feel about spending longer than that in each others company. They had already
been together for longer than usual tonight, but James couldn't help but want to push his luck.
James was working up the courage to ask Reg when his thoughts were interrupted.

“Is it bad that I don't want to go back to my common room yet?”

James couldn't believe his luck, “It's not bad at all, but may I ask why?”

Regulus took a deep sigh before responding, “It's just-I hate being questioned, and I know Barty
and Evan are gonna ask me a million questions about where I've been. Plus I'm sure the professors
will find me at some point and yell at me for skipping my mealtime and breaking my safety
regulations. I just don't want to deal with all of that, not right now. It's been a very long day.”

James nodded and understood, “Well, if you really don't want to go back to the common room, I
have a place we can go.” Regulus looked at him curiously and James continued, “It's a place that
nobody would be able to find us, I promise.”

Regulus cocked his head curiously, “Nobody could find us?”

James nodded, “I can guarantee you that no one will find you until you want them to. The only
requirement I have is that if you ever want to go there, take me with you.”

“Oh, so it's a place that I'm not allowed to go without you?”

“No, you're allowed. I just would rather you'd go there with me.”

“Okay Potter, it's a deal. So are you planning on showing me this mysterious place or are we going
to sit here all night and discuss elf rights?”

James laughed, “While I am sure you have plenty more to say on that subject. I think we should
probably go before these elves think you are ready to liberate them in one night.”

Regulus gifted James with one of those rare smiles and then they both began to make their way out
of the kitchen. Regulus walked slightly behind James, seeing as he wasn't sure where they were
going on their way.

He was taking Regulus to the Room of Requirement, otherwise known as the Come and Go Room.
It was this amazing room that would essentially fit any need you had and help you in any way that
it could.

James and his friends had discovered the Room of Requirement when they were hiding from Filch
after one of their pranks had gone awry. James remembered it perfectly.

They were in their fourth year and they had just finished charming some of the portraits on the
seventh floor to sing Starman by David Bowie, whenever someone walked by. Unfortunately, Peter
was spotted by Mrs. Norris and had to escape by turning into Wormtail. He had run to find the rest
of the marauders and together they all ran to hide from the cat and Mr. Filch, who was never far
from Mrs. Norris.

So that meant the boys had very few places they could hide on the seventh floor. There was the
Gryffindor common room but there was no way they were going to lead the caretaker there, as he'd
discover it was them in a second. So instead they went through a corridor they didn't visit very
often when all of a sudden a door appeared. The boys had never seen this door before so naturally,
they went in to hide in there.
It was a normal door, nothing particularly special at all. Then again they hadn't needed anything
special, all they needed was somewhere inconspicuous to hide. They all poured into the room and
discovered a plain room. It was about the size of a classroom and there were four chairs in the
middle of the room in a circle facing each other. That was it, there was nothing else there.

Just as suddenly as the door had appeared, it disappeared. They immediately panicked, wondering
how they were going to escape the room. After scouring the room for other exits they eventually
had resided to wait until someone found them. They sat in the circle of chairs, biding their time
until Peter started to complain of thirst and how he wished he had an ice-cold butterbeer.

Then suddenly there was a butterbeer on the floor next to his chair. He picked it up and took a big
swig, even though his friends warned him not to try what was obviously dark magic. It turned out it
really was just butterbeer. Ice cold and frothy butterbeer, just like Madam Rosmerta’s.

Shortly after all the boys had tried the mysterious butterbeer, the door appeared again and the boys
wasted no time escaping the room. When they escaped they found that Filch was nowhere to be
found and the door had turned back into a wall.

The next day, the boys had decided to check out the room again. They had marked where it was
and after all of their classes, they went back and stood in front of the wall again. They weren't able
to figure out how to get back in the room until Peter, once again, started complaining that he had to
go to the bathroom then suddenly the door appeared again, and inside was a small lavatory.

The boys had been absolutely shocked, as just yesterday the room had been a large open space and
now it was a small bathroom. The boys had experimented for hours, testing the limits of the room.

They found out they had to walk in front of the room three times or at least stand in front of the
room for thirty seconds. They had to think very hard about what they needed and it helped when
you imagine the room you are looking for as well.

Then the room would turn into whatever it was you were looking for, whether it was a bathroom, a
space to sleep, or a room large enough to play a game. The room provided everything the boys
needed for the room they imagined. The magic was incredible, but they actually didn't use the
room very often.

Not that they never used the room, they certainly did to hide from Filch, they used it to plan
pranks, and they used it on occasion to get absolutely smashed with Madam Rosemeta’s best
firewhiskey. The boys just hadn't used the room as much as they had imagined they would. They
had agreed for the most part to only go to the room as a group, but James thought that if they didn't
find out he took Regulus, then there was no harm, no foul. At least that was the way he tried to
think of it, so he didn't feel guilty.

They were heading up the second set of stairs on their way to their destination when Regulus
finally asked, “Where are we going, Potter?”

James looked over at Regulus and smiled devilishly, “It's a surprise. Just wait until we get there,
you'll love it, I promise.”

“I don't know if I can believe you, Potter. I don't think you have quite the taste you think you do,”
Regulus teased.

“And what is that supposed to mean, baby Black.”

Regulus groaned at the use of the nickname, “Ugh don't call me that. And you're friends with my
brother, that shows enough about your terrible taste.”

James laughed loudly and couldn't resist teasing the boy more, “Yeah, you're right baby Black.”
Regulus quirked his eyebrow in surprise at the agreement, “I am best friends with Sirius and I am
snogging you practically every day. So maybe I don't have the best taste in scrawny rich boys.”

Regulus scoffed and shoved James good-naturedly, laughing a bit, but he didn't speak anymore. He
just followed James to where he was taking him. This allowed James the time to think about the
excuse he had given his friends when he left them at dinner.

He remembered that he just wanted to make a quick excuse and find the Slytherin boy, so he had
said the first thing he could think of. He told his friends he was going for a walk, that was hours
ago. He figured they might be looking for him by now so he probably should stop by his common
room and let them know he's fine. James really didn't think that Regulus Black would be okay with
waiting outside the Gryffindor common room while James gave his brother another lie about
where he was going.

It's not that he didn't feel bad for lying to them and causing them to worry but, Sirius disappeared
randomly whenever he had a new girl. When he was dating Marlene he would often spend all night
out with her and come back at all hours of the night. James figured he could get away with it
tonight, as he wouldn't be out all night, probably just a little past curfew.
The one thing James was worried about was the Marauders Map. He usually had it with him
whenever he went to meet Regulus, both to keep his friends from seeing it and to sneak around
Filch's rounds about the school. Tonight, however, he hadn't been planning on meeting the boy so
he didn't have the map.

He hoped that his friends hadn't already looked for him on the map. He figured he could still
explain why he was Regulus Black to this point. They wouldn't have seen him on the grounds,
though the map extended that far, they never would've guessed he was out there in this cold. IF
they saw the two boys in the kitchen, he could tell them that he was there for a snack because he
missed dinner and Regulus coincidently was there for the same reason. Now if they saw him
walking in the corridors with the Black heir, that was a bit dicier.

He wasn't sure how he would explain that and he would be completely screwed if he happened to
run into them on his way up to the seventh floor. He knew that once they made it up to the Room
of Requirement they would be safe. The Room of Requirement refused to show up on the map so
once the boys were in the room they would disappear from the map.

James felt the beating of anxiety in his chest at the idea of being discovered. He had imagined the
way Sirius would react many times, and all he really knew was that it wouldn't be good for their
friendship.

They were on the sixth floor nearing the stairs for the seventh floor when suddenly Regulus
stopped short. James turned to ask him why he stopped and what was wrong when suddenly
Regulus grabbed his arm and jerked him in the classroom on their left. He shoved James past the
door as he slammed the door shut and pressed his ear to the door listening for something.

James, who was very confused at the moment, leaned his ear against the door as well, trying to
hear what Regulus had heard. When he did hear the voices, he was shell shocked.

Outside in the corridor, where James just was practically betraying his best friend with Regulus,
were the rest of the Marauders. As soon as he heard their voices he panicked, he thought that they
must have the map and that they'd be bursting in the door in a second. When they didn't
immediately burst into the classroom, yelling of betrayal, James realized they must've left the map
in the common room.

James was shocked when Sirius finally spoke, “Well, where do you think he is?”

Then Remus’s calm voice spoke quietly, “I don't know, Pads. He said he was going for a walk
hours ago, he could be anywhere.”
Fuck. James should've known that they would come looking for him. He thanked Merlin that Reg
pulled them into this classroom before his friends came around the corner. Though he wasn't sure
how Regulus could have possibly heard the boys when James hadn't.

“You don't think he's meeting a girl or something, do you?” Sirius’s voice questioned, sounding a
bit tense.

Peter's voice squeaked out a reply, “Well if he is, he doesn't want anybody to know about it. I
certainly haven't heard anything about a new girl from him, have you?”

“No I haven't but to be fair James hasn't been really telling me his secrets lately.”

Remus, ever the voice of reason, spoke next, “Come on, Pads, don't jump to conclusions. What we
need is the map, instead of aimlessly wandering the halls. It's on my nightstand, let's go up and
grab it.”

Sirius spoke, “Right you are, Moony. Lead the way.”

James could hear the murmuring voices becoming less distinctive as the boys walked away from
the door, back up the common room. He let out a deep sigh once they were gone, relieved that they
hadn't been caught. That would've taken more explaining and he didn't know how he would've
covered it.

He silently thanked Merlin that Regulus had heard them and shoved them both in the classroom.
Although he wasn't sure how Regulus had heard the boys coming when James hadn't heard a thing.
Maybe he felt some kind of connection to Sirius and knew when he was near. That idea was
probably a bit ridiculous but James didn't have time to ponder it anymore.

He suddenly realized that his friends were going upstairs right now, to get the map to find James.
They had to move if they didn't want to be caught. James grabbed Regulus's wrist and pulled him
with him up the seventh floor, while Regulus whined behind him trying to pull his wrist back.

James didn't stop until they were in front of the room and he closed his eyes quickly, thinking
about how he needed a room his friends couldn't find him in. About thirty seconds later, a large
door appeared on the plain wall.
Regulus gasped loudly, but James quickly pulled him into the room, shutting the door behind them.
He needed to make sure they were out of sight from his friends before Regulus began asking
questions about the room because James knew they were probably endless.

Regulus, who thank Merlin, seemed to forget all about James’s unceremoniously pulling him up
the stairs in favor of the wonder of the room, looking around with wide eyes taking everything in.

Now he had plenty of time to answer the multitudes of questions Regulus had about the room.

“Oh my God! Where did this door come from? Where are we? What is this place?”

James laughed at Regulus’s flustered expression, “Have you ever heard of the Room of
Requirement?”

Regulus gasped dramatically looking around the room in excitement, “This is the Room of
Requirement?”

The room looked exactly how James had imagined it when requesting. It was supposed to be a
mixture of both the Slytherin and Gryffindor common rooms. The couch and armchair were dark
green velvet and the walls were a dark red. All the woodwork was dark walnut and there was a
fireplace roaring on the back wall of the room. He had to admit the room actually looked pretty
good, even though he wasn't the biggest fan of green, he had wanted Regulus to be comfortable
there too.

“Where did you find this place? Or how did you find this place?”

“We found this place, the marauders and I, after a prank when we needed to hide from Filch. We
started testing its limits after that and I have got to tell you this place has wicked magic.”

“I bet it does,” Regulus closed his eyes and a moment later there was a bed in the corner of the
room.

A large canopy bed with black silk sheets. James gaped a bit at the sudden appearance and sorted
to the thoughts he had had since they entered the room. Had he somehow unknowingly asked the
room for a bed? He wasn't sure how he had because he didn't remember ever thinking about being
with Reggie on a bed. They had been together in a lot of odd places and a bed seemed almost too
normal for their peculiar relationship.

When he looked back to Regulus, about to apologize for his wanton thoughts, he saw a dark flush
of the boy's cheeks. James hadn't made the bed appear, Regulus had. James wasn't sure why but the
idea that Regulus was the one imagining the two of them in a bed made him feel really smug.

Regulus stumbled over his explanation, “I-I uh-I just wanted to try it out and see if it worked.”

James smirked cockily, “And you chose a bed?”

Regulus flushed darker, if it was possible, “Don't flatter yourself, Potter. It was just the first thing I
could think of.”

“Oh really? The first thing you thought of in a room with me was a bed big enough for the both of
us?”

Regulus punched James in the arm, “Fuck off Potter.”

James laughed and raised his hands above his head in mock surrender, “Sorry, sorry it was just a
joke. “ Then James stepped closer to Reg so that they were inches apart, “But honestly, Reggie, I
like where your head’s at.”

Now it was Regulus who smirked at him as he wrapped his arms around James’s neck, “I never
said that's where my head is at. Where would you get such a ridiculous idea?”

James laughed, “From your obvious attempt at seducing me, Reg. Honestly, you needn't go
through the effort, just bat those pretty eyelashes and I'm yours.”

Regulus cocked his head at James teasingly, “Oh it's that easy is it?”

“Yeah, it really is.”

“And how disappointed would you be if I told you that I actually hadn't meant to conjure a bed, it
must've been subconscious.”

James liked that even more, “Not disappointed at all. In fact, that's almost better, because it means
that even in the back of your head you want me, and it's pretty clear how. Who would've guessed
Regulus Black was such a perv?”

Regulus tightened his arms around James and leaned in to whisper into his ear, “Well maybe you
don't know me that well, Potter.”

James didn't know what possessed him to say it. It could've gone very badly. Regulus could have
pulled back and left the room immediately. James knew what they were doing wasn't like a
relationship or anything, not a real one. Not that he wanted a real relationship with Reg, it's just that
at that moment he couldn't help himself. When he had the lithe beautiful boy wrapped up in his
arms, sometimes his romantic heart couldn't help but pretend they were more. That was not a
problem for Regulus, who always had his composure perfectly in line, so James feared he would
scare him away.

James leaned back just enough to gaze into Regulus’s eyes, “Well maybe I want to know you
better, Black. Maybe I want to discover all your secrets”

Regulus’s eyes suddenly became intense and possibly darkened an entire shade, but he didn't say
anything. Regulus and he just stared into each other's eyes, a moment passing between them, when
suddenly Reg crashes his lips to James’s. Suddenly the too intense moment was gone and left
behind was a bare heat between the boys.

Regulus’s kiss is rough and almost hungry, James finds he really enjoys this side of Regulus. The
part of him that seems eager for James, something he has never really shown before. He is usually
very involved in their hookups but he never takes the lead like he is today.

James kisses Regulus as deep as he can, nipping at the Slytherin’s lip slightly in the way he knows
the boy likes. He begins running his hand down the boy's body, feeling the lean and tight body of
Regulus Black. His hands are on Regulus's back when Regulus suddenly throws a leg up on
James’s hip, causing James to grab Reg’s ass to his balance. Once, James had a firm hold Regulus
threw his other leg up, and now James was holding the boy completely, still snogging him deeply.

James took a moment to analyze what he should do here. They had fooled around plenty of times
already, but that was usually just snogging, handjobs, and the occasional blowjob. This felt
different somehow. They were all alone in a place where they wouldn't be interrupted and they
actually had a bed there with them. They could, if they wanted to, do more than they've done
before.

James wasn't sure he was quite ready for the next step between the two boys. He knew he wanted
Regulus as he'd never wanted anyone in his life, but he also knew that both the boys were young.
Probably too young to take a step like that without proper research on how said action was done.
He knew it was ridiculous to have these thoughts when he wasn't even sure if Reg would ever want
to take that step.

He was thrust back into the present when Reg broke the kiss and leaned his forehead on James’,
panting heavily. The boy's heavy breathing was the only sound, besides the roaring fire, in the
room. Regulus finally spoke softly after catching his breath, “So are you going to make use of that
bed or do you just want to hold me the rest of the night?”

James was a bit shocked that Regulus was encouraging him to make use of the bed, but he followed
the Slytherin's direction and carried Reg over the bed. He set Regulus on his back and laid the boy
down on the bed, kissing him deeply.

Regulus still had his legs wrapped around James’s waist; his hands were in his hair. James had
noticed that was Regulus’s favorite place to put his hands. Whether he was running his hands
through it or gripping it tightly, he seemed to love pulling the messy raven-colored hair.

Suddenly Regulus rolled them over so that he was straddling James instead. Reg breaks their kiss
and trails his lips to James's cheek, his jawline, and down to his neck, kissing his way down. James
had never really understood the purpose of sucking and biting someone's neck. A muggle girl had
once done it to him and it had mostly been uncomfortable, but this was different. James wasn't sure
if it was because Regulus was taking charge or what, but he was extremely turned on.

Suddenly Regulus leaned up and looked into James’s eyes as if he was contemplating something.
James wasn't sure what he was contemplating but he must've made a decision because he began
unbuttoning his shirt.

James felt his eyes widen and he couldn't believe Reg was actually taking off his shirt. They had
fooled around plenty, but all of that was either over the clothes or with just their hands. James had
never actually seen Regulus shirtless, but he had imagined it a few times.

James’s imagination had nothing on the real Regulus Black. Beautiful didn't even begin to cover it.
His flawless porcelain skin, his sinewy torso, and his small pink nipples. James devoured
Regulus’s torso with his eyes.

When he finally let his eyes drift back up to Regulus’s face, he saw insecurity. As if Regulus
wasn't sure if James found him attractive or not. Which James found a little ridiculous considering
Regulus could more than likely feel James’s arousal.

“You are so beautiful.”

Regulus flushed and brushed the compliment off, “Oh shut up Potter. Now it's your turn.”

James began unbuttoning his shirt but was struggling a bit at seeing the buttonholes, as he was
laying down. So Regulus reached over and began unbuttoning his shirt for him. James had no
problem with this and instead just watched the long nibble fingers work.

Once the shirt was unbuttoned he leaned up and Regulus helped him slip the shirt the rest of the
way off. Regulus stared down at James’s torso, and James silently thanked Merlin that he hadn't
been skipping his workouts lately. Regulus kissed James again and they both had their fill of each
other's bodies, both boys running their hands along each other's skin.

James couldn't believe that a boy who had an eating disorder for nearly a month of school could
still be this toned. He was though, and James couldn't get enough of it. There was something about
feeling the taut muscles of Regulus Black that James found addicting.

James was shocked when about five minutes into their snogging, Regulus pressed crotch into
James’s. James wondered briefly if it was on purpose and then he remembered Regulus’s affinity
for teasing him and he realized that was a ridiculous thought.

After the boy had pressed himself into James a few more times James pulled back from the kiss,
“What do you think you're doing?”

Regulus panted into James's ear, out of breath from the heavy kissing, “What do you mean?”

He punctuated the end of his question with another press into James. James groaned, “You are
such a fucking tease, Reggie.”
Regulus let out an evil little laugh and then a surprised squeak when James flipped them once more
so he was on top. He smiled down at Regulus with a mischievous glint in his eye, “Too bad I like
that about you.”

Then the boys were kissing again, hard and rough. Their hands glided up and down each other's
bodies, discovering more of their partners. Suddenly Regulus thrusted up on James, grinding his
crotch into him. Then the boys were working together and developing a rhythm for each of them to
find their pleasure.

When they finally did, they lay panting on the bed next to each other. James wondered whether he
should leave or not, that's what they usually did after fooling around. They never stuck around to
deal with the awkward after-effects of their relationship. He decided he wouldn't leave unless Reg
told him to, which he never did.

When the boys had calmed significantly, they were laying in a pleasant silence. James enjoyed
laying with him and he knew Regulus preferred the quiet but he could only take so much of it. So
he decided to kill two birds with one stone and get to know Reg while he was at it.

He cleared his throat slightly and turned to look at Regulus, who still had his eyes trained on the
ceiling, “What's your favorite color?”

Regulus slowly looked towards James, with a confused expression, “Why?”

“There has to be a reason for me to want to know your favorite color.”

“I mean is there a reason you want to know?

James resisted the urge to groan, it should not be this hard to learn someone's favorite color,
“Maybe I would just like to know the favorite color of the guy I am sleeping with.”

Regulus looked confused, “We aren't sleeping together. That infers that we are having sex, which
we aren't.”

“I know that but I meant the guy I am doing sexual actions with.”
“Oh well, I am not sure that's reason enough for you to want to learn my favorite color.”

“So if we were having sex you'd tell me your favorite color?”

Regulus glared at him and James backtracked, “Sorry I’m just joking. I just don't know why you
won't let me get to know you at all.”

Regulus looked at him, clearly thinking, before responding, “I just don't want you to get to know
me and realize that it was a waste of your time.”

James couldn't believe that Regulus thought so low of himself, “I am never wasting time when I
am with you.”

Regulus blushed, “Black.”

James furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “What?”

“My favorite color is Black.”

James chuckled slightly, “I assume it has no relation to your last name?”

“You’d be correct in that assumption. What's your favorite color?”

“Red.”

It was Regulus’s turn to laugh, “And you make fun of my favorite color.”

“I can't help it, it's a great color. What is your favorite animal?
The two boys continued to ask questions and share stories all night until it was way too late for
either of them to be out.
 Best friends?

James

James woke up feeling inexplicably warm. The sheets against his skin were cool and silky yet soft.
The blanket, which had not been on him when he had fallen asleep, was a velvety texture that he
found quite lovely. He assumed the blanket was the room's idea, recognizing the chill in the night.

He looked to his left and there he was, Regulus Black. With his raven-colored hair, porcelain skin,
and pink lips sleeping soundly next to him. He was peaceful when he slept, not a frown or pinched
expression to be found. He looked content. James found himself enamored once again by Regulus.

He found himself watching Regulus for a bit before he finally reached over to the bedside table for
his pocket watch. It had been handed down to all the male heirs and his family for generations, so
he always had it with him. He had set both his glasses and the watch on the table before he had
fallen asleep.

He put on his glasses and checked the time, and immediately panicked. Fuck it was six in the
morning. They had slept there all night and James’s friends were probably wondering where he
was. He hoped they weren't too upset with him. He hopped out of bed quickly and grabbed his shirt
from the floor, and began buttoning it up as quickly as he could.

His sudden movements must have jostled Regulus out of his sleep because the boy began groaning
and stretching awake. Regulus ran a hand through his hair and looked up at James confused before
his eyes suddenly got wide and he rolled off the bed quickly. Landing in a pile before jumping to
his feet quickly, finding his shirt as he went.

He began buttoning it and seemed to be looking for his tie, “Shit, what time is it?”

James, still looking for his own possessions, briefly taking a break to stare at the breathtakingly
disheveled boy in front of him, responded, “It’s six o'clock.”

Regulus’s eyes got comically wide and he muttered something along the lines of, fuck me. Which
made James immediately picture the two of them having sex, which completely distracted him
from his thoughts of his friends. Suddenly Regulus began walking towards the door, without
having found his tie.

James called out to him just before he reached the door, “Don't you want to find your tie?”
Regulus turned back and set a glare on James that had him stepping back slightly in surprise,
“Don't you want to make sure your friends don't think that you are dead?”

James was shocked by Regulus’s words and the bitterness in his voice. After the night that the
boys had had he would've thought the ice around the Black heir would have melted a bit. They had
an excellent night. James was amazed by all that he had learned about Regulus. He had learned
ridiculous things like that Regulus's favorite season was winter. His favorite book happened to be a
muggle romance book called Pride and Prejudice. He had learned that Regulus only drinks his tea
with two spoonfuls of sugar in it because he preferred sweet things. He learned that Regulus’s
favorite sweet was sugar quills.

He also learned some more important things like how Regulus and Sirius had both taken French
lessons since they were four and five respectively. When the brothers got angry with each other
when they were younger, they would argue in French. That part made James wish he had seen the
two boys argue more. He also knew that Regulus would often listen outside Sirius’s door and listen
to the muggle music his brother would blast. He never went in the room because his mother and
father would kill him if he did, but he would often sit outside the door listening.

He learned that Reg would go to the astronomy tower around eight o'clock most nights,
specifically the ones that he didn't meet up with James, and look out into the stars pretending he
was speaking to his ancestors. That one James found particularly interesting and endearing. It was
sweet and naive, not something Regulus was generally considered. Though the more James thought
about it the more he thought Regulus could be described as both the former and the latter. The
naivety of believing that your family had your best interest in heart always. The sweetness to love
your house-elf no matter what.

The boys had talked about a lot of ridiculous things and James had told him a lot too. James had
told Regulus about how his father played the fiddle every Christmas night and how it was his
favorite part of the holiday. He had told him about the first time he had ridden on a broom and how
it had felt. He had shared with Regulus his loneliness as an only child and his secret desire for
siblings; he hadn't even told Sirius about that wish.

James did feel guilty about causing his friends to worry about him, but he couldn't bring himself to
regret his night spent with Regulus. He wished there was a way he could explain to his friends,
without lying, where he was last night. James actually hated lying, but he knew that it was a
necessary evil in his relationship with Regulus.

James had gotten to know Regulus in a way he never thought he would. He found that the more he
got to know about Regulus, the more he liked him. James wondered what Regulus would be like in
life without stress or at least without the parental pressure he received. HE wondered if Regulus
would be easier to make smile and if he would ever do silly things without pondering the
consequences first.

He knew that all the wondering he did, would have no fruition. He would never get to see the
younger Black sibling in that way unless the boy decided to leave home. If he left home and
escaped from his family, as Sirius did, then maybe James would see this side. Unfortunately,
Regulus had made it clear he had no plans of leaving his family.

James pondered back to why Regulus had rushed out in such a snippy mood, after the night they
had both had. Talking for hours and then both slowly falling asleep next to each other. Not to
sound cheesy, but it was incredible. Why did the boy seem angry when he left?

No, he supposed Regulus wasn't angry. He had seemed more stressed out than anything. Why
would he be stressed out about a night here? Regulus couldn't be worried about what his friends
thought, but he must've been worried about the professors. He had missed meal time, bed check,
and skipped out early on his study session yesterday. There were bound to be consequences for
breaking his stress regulations like that.

He couldn't believe that he had been stupid enough to keep Regulus out all night. Yes, Reg had not
wanted to go back to his dorms, but James should've realized that he needed to. Instead, James was
a selfish dick and took advantage of the boy’s bad mood in order to get to know him better.

He knew that the professors wouldn't believe Regulus if he said that he had just not been feeling
well, and that's why he didn't go to dinner because if he wasn't feeling well, he was under strict
orders to visit Madam Pomfrey and get treatment. James wished he could do something to help
Regulus, after all, it was partially his fault. He wished he could take back what he had done, even
though it had been a wonderful night. He didn't want Regulus to get in trouble and he certainly
didn't want Regulus to connect whatever consequence to their night. He wanted the Slytherin to
remember the night and James fondly.

Then James had a bit of an epiphany, he knew someone who could help. As he was leaving the
Room of Requirement he spotted a flash of green slung over one of the armchairs. He grabbed it
and stuffed it in his pocket quickly.

James raced to Professor McGonagall’s office, hoping that she would be there this early in the
morning. Shortly after knocking he received a curt reply to enter. He was extremely lucky she
happened to be in.

James found himself opening the door only at that moment, wondering a bit too late whether he
looked presentable enough to be speaking to a teacher.

Minerva McGonagall zeroed her hawk-like eyes on James and raised an eyebrow curiously,
“Mr.Potter. You're up early today aren't you?”

James noticed her scan of his overly rumpled clothes and lack of tie. He felt a bit self-conscious but
powered through, looking her straight in the eyes confidently, “Yes professor, I am an early riser. I
am sorry to bother you so early but I realized that I never told you about last night.”

She narrowed her gaze at him as if her bullshit sensors were tripping, James would be surprised if
they were, “And what is so important that you had to tell me first thing in the morning.”

James felt awkward with her sitting at her desk and him standing by the door but he didn't want to
invite himself in, “I forgot to tell you about Regulus Black.”

Now, this certainly caught her attention, “What about Regulus Black?”

James cleared his throat slightly and tried to be confident in his reply, “Well, I do not doubt that
you noticed that he wasn’t at dinner last night and I'm guessing he missed his bed check too.”

She fixed a withering stare on him pausing a minute before speaking, “Yes, I had heard that. What
information could you possibly have to explain that obvious disregard of his regulations.”

“It's not his fault!”James was a bit embarrassed at his outburst but continued his explanation,
“Okay, I know I wasn't supposed to do this. But well I am sure you realize that Regulus is rather
intelligent.”

Minerva again raised an eyebrow in curiosity, “Yes, he's quite brilliant. However, I don't see why
that's any of your concern?”

“Professor McGonagall, as you know NEWT’s are coming up next year and I’d really like to do
well. Also, I was sort of hoping to be the head boy next year.” She cocked her head at the proper
use of her name. He understood her intrigue as he hadn't called her professor McGonagall since
first year. Now Sirius and he strictly referred to her as Minnie.
He had never thought about being head boy before. In fact, he hadn't even thought about being a
prefect before until Remus resigned. He knew that this excuse would be the most sound and the
most likely to sway her opinion.

“I hadn't realized you wanted to be head boy, Mr. Potter. And while I respect that ambition and
your acknowledgment of that goal. I still don't quite understand what that has to do with Mr.
Black.”

“Of course not. Sorry, I believe I'm rambling a bit, but I am sure you know that Reggie- I mean
Regulus and Sirius aren't on the best of terms. And I thought that Regulus was my best chance of
doing well on my exams as my tutor.”

She looked positively flabbergasted, James almost wanted to laugh, “Mr. Potter, are you telling me
that Regulus Black is tutoring you?”

“Yes, he is helping me in the subjects I struggle with.”

“What subjects would that be? As far as I have heard you are one of the best students in your
year.”

‘I am not the best, though. If I want to reach my goal of being head boy, then I need to be better.
Regulus is the best in his year”

“But he is not in your year, Mr. Potter. Your dedication to reaching your goals is admirable, but
don't you think you would be better off being tutored by someone in your year or older? Maybe
Remus Lupin or Lily Evans? Or even Frank Longbottom? I have heard you are on very good terms
with him.”

“We are, professor. Frank is a great guy, but he is very busy with his own NEWT’s at the moment.
Lily and I are not on the best of terms, so I doubt she would be willing to help me. And as for
Remus, I am too embarrassed to ask a close friend for such a favor. Although he would be a good
choice seeing as he was prefect before he gave it up and it was passed to me.”

McGonagall had a troubled expression on her face before she interrupted James, “Mr. Potter, you
are very qualified for the job of prefect. Please don't look at yourself as a second choice for the job.
The reason it was originally given to Mr. Lupin is that he is better at staying out of trouble than the
rest of you.”
This made James inwardly smile, if only she knew that Remus was the mastermind behind their
most devious pranks, she continued, ”You are doing a wonderful job this year, despite all the
pranks. You were a real asset during our dealings with the young Mr. Black. That is something we
really like to see in our prefects. I suppose I understand your reasons for not choosing any of my
suggested tutors, but may I ask, why Mr. Black? I'd imagine his brother wouldn't be very pleased
with him tutoring you.”

Exactly what James needed her to ask, he put on a sheepish smile before answering, “That's the
thing, he doesn't know. We are sort of keeping it a secret. Partially because of Sirius but also
because his friends wouldn't be pleased with him being around a blood traitor.”

She flinched slightly at the word and looked him in the eyes before saying seriously, “I don't listen
to those types of words. I'd appreciate it if you don't use them in my presence, Mr. Potter.”

“I am sorry Professor, but last night Regulus and I were studying and we sort of lost track of time. I
had brought food to him from the kitchens so that we could meet early in the night as I had planned
on getting a good night's sleep for our class today. Transfiguring wardrobes into boars is very
exciting, but also straining.”

She cut off his rambling, “Potter continue with the story please.”

“Yes, sorry. So I thought we could meet earlier so I brought him some food and I, of course, didn't
think about the fact that he would be missed at dinner. And that's completely my fault, but we did
eat, I swear. When we began studying, too late if I'm honest and I felt very bad about that, we
ended up falling asleep in the astronomy tower. We made it back to bed just after curfew. I am
truly sorry about that, but it's my fault, not his.

“That is very admirable of you, Mr. Potter, but Regulus is not a little boy, he knows his regulations.
He knows he's supposed to be at dinner and well-.” She held up her hand as James tried to interject,
“I agree that it is mostly your fault. Regulus still has some blame in the matter and I expect the
next time you have a tutoring session to remind him that his regulations are very serious.”

James didn't miss the part about their next tutoring session and he instantly knew his story had
worked, “Yes, professor of course.”

I admire you for having goals while here at Hogwarts, but the fact remains that you are aware of
Regulus Blacks regulations and you still were party to his breaking them, whether it is for the
cause of tutoring or not. I will allow this tutoring to continue, but for no more than an hour a day
and you will serve detention for the rest of the week.”

James wanted to groan at the punishment but he had expected some repercussions to his story.
However, he had scored Regulus an extra hour of studying, which would make him very happy.
Maybe it would even be an excuse for James to spend a little time with Regulus every day.

James nodded his understanding to the professor and turned to leave the office. Just as he had his
hand on the door, Professor McGonagall spoke once more, “Mr. Potter. May I ask you what
Regulus Black is getting out of this arrangement.”

Jame paused and turned slightly to look at the professor. James considered what he could say to the
professor that would be believable. She would never believe that James was paying him as Regulus
was very wealthy himself. So in a moment of madness, he decided to tell the truth.

He smirked at the professor smugly, “Me, he gets me. Have a nice day professor.”

Then he turned around and left the office leaving behind a shocked professor in his wake.

******************************************************************************

After leaving Professor McGonagall's office, James snuck back into his dorm room and decided to
lay down for a while before getting ready for school. He was just falling asleep when suddenly his
curtains were thrown open. His eyes shot open to the site or Sirius looming over him, looking livid.

Fuck. Of course, his friends were going to be pissed that he was gone all night. He had forgotten to
come up with a reasonable explanation, as he was dealing with Regulus’s professor issue first.

Sirius’s voice was deceptively calm, holding back a torrent of anger, “Where the fuck have you
been all night?”

James, being the idiot he is playing dumb, “What do you mean?”

Sirius’s eyes blazed with fire, or so it felt when that glare reached James’s own eyes, “Do not play
dumb with me James Potter. And you better not try to tell me you've been here all night because I
have been checking every half hour for you and were not here.”

James blushed, “Uh I was just out for a walk, then I decided to sit up in the astronomy tower and I
ended up falling asleep. I am sorry.”

“That is fucking bullshit. Wanna know how I know? It's because we looked for you in the
astronomy tower, twice. In fact, we looked in nearly every room in this god-forsaken castle and
you were nowhere to be found. And you were not on the map, so where were you?”

James hesitated, until Peter who was in the bed across from him spoke up, “Come on James. I got
detention from being out too late looking for you and now I have to miss my date with Maggie.
The least you could do is tell us where you were.”

“Listen, I told you I am sorry. I didn't think you guys would look for me that hard. I mean Sirius
used to not come back at night sometimes. We never went looking for him, so I didn't expect you
to look for me.”

Sirius sputtered, but Remus spoke next from his current position, leaning against the side of his
own bed, “We didn't go looking for him because he does that all the time, it was usual behavior.
Whereas you have never just disappeared for so long without an explanation. Besides, we could
always find him on the map, but you weren't on the map last night.”

Sirius cut back into the conversation, finally recovering after being thrown under the bus by James,
“Yeah where were you? On a date in Hogsmeade?”

James frowned in confusion, “What? Why the hell would I have been on a date in Hogsmeade?
Especially that late?”

“That's a good question, James. Why would you have been? It doesn't make sense, yet you weren't
on the map so I truly don't know where you could've been.”

James was slightly relieved that they hadn't thought of the Room of Requirement, because he had a
feeling it wouldn't make them feel any better to know he had brought someone to their secret place.
“Listen I don't know what was wrong with the map, but I was in the castle the whole time. I just
needed a little space and time to myself, okay?”

Sirius was not very understanding, “That's fucking bullshit, James.”

“Not really. You are one of the clingiest people I know.”

Sirius gaped and practically yelled, “I am not clingy!”

“Yes, you are.” Remus deadpanned. Sirius looked utterly betrayed and glared at his friend.

James was hoping that they would move on from interrogating him now, until Peter spoke next,
“Why are you lying to us?”

James gaped at him, when Sirius turned his attention back to the interrogation, “Yeah Jamie, why
are you lying to your best friends? Not just today, but you've been lying to us for weeks. there are
only so many prefect rounds that you can do in one month.”

James was about to speak and try to sputter up some excuse when Peter spoke again, “No I mean a
couple weeks ago when Sirius came to the study group?”

Both James and Sirius turned to him in confusion and almost in sync asked, “What?”

Peter rolled his eyes as if they were the ones being cryptic, “A couple of weeks ago when Remus
had his study session, I asked you to come and you told me you were practicing quidditch. But then
Marlene told me you couldn't because Ravenclaw had the pitch booked. Then when Sirius came in
he told us that you told him that you had a prefect meeting, which also couldn't have been true
because Lily Evans was there and she wouldn't miss a prefect engagement.”

James was absolutely shocked that Peter had put all those clues together and come up with James
being a big fat dirty liar. Sirius looked utterly betrayed, “You lied to me about that? You made me
go to that boring meeting so you could hook up with your little bunny in some broom cupboard“
He ignored the squawk of denial from Remus.
James flushed red. Holy shit Sirius didn't know how right he was. James didn't know what to say so
instead he just asked, “Bunny?”

Sirius glared, “It's a nickname since you refuse to tell us who you are sneaking around with.”

“I am not sneaking around with anyone!”

“Oh really? Then why is it that multiple times every week you sneak out late at night with the map
and don't return for hours?”Sirius said in a mocking tone.

James was shocked and embarrassed. He had no idea his friends had noticed him leaving the dorm
at night. Now that he did know, he just felt idiotic and childish.

“I do not have a girlfriend.” James reinforces, he didn't want to lie to them anymore. He didn't want
to let them believe he had a girlfriend when he didn't, but he couldn't let them know about Regulus.

James got up from the bed hoping to make a quick getaway to the bathroom, but they followed
him, “You are such a goddamn liar James. All you do is lie now. When are you going, to be honest
with us?”

James groaned loudly, he was so sick of being bitched at. Just before he reached the bathroom he
turned towards them, “I told you what I told you. You either believe it or you don't, but either way
you better fucking drop this.”

James slammed the bathroom door and took a long shower in an attempt to improve his mood.
When he exited the bathroom, his friends were gone.

After getting dressed he headed down to breakfast. He went to sit next to his friends only to find
that his seat was taken by some kid that James didn't even know. None of his friends would look at
him or speak to him, so he went to sit by Frank Longbottom and some other seventh years.

James liked Frank and his friends, he really did, but they just weren't the same as his friends. He
couldn't talk about the same things with them as he could the marauders. Still, it was nice of them
to let him sit there, although he could have done without watching Frank and Alice Fortescue
snogging in front of him while he tried to eat.,
It turned out James would be eating the rest of his meals for the day with Frank and Alice because
the Marauders hadn't talked to him all day.

In Herbology, Sirius had refused to sit with him. Instead of making him sit all by himself which
made him feel pathetic.

In Potions, Remus refused to help him with his brew, even though it was turning a nasty brown
color. Which resulted in a zero for the day, bringing his day from bad to worse.

In Divinations, Peter had turned to the person on his right instead of James on his left to tell them
some gossip he had heard about some Ravenclaw girl. Although James never really cared much for
Peter’s gossip, it hurt not to be the chosen audience for his friend anymore.

Transfigurations were definitely the worst though. First of all, Sirius had not said a word to him the
entire time, even though they were deskmates. James had even pulled out his best material on Mrs.
Norris and Filch and Sirius hadn't even cracked a grin. That hurt his ego pretty badly and he didn't
try to speak to Sirius after that.

What was worse was the look McGonagall was giving him though. She kept staring at him with a
curious expression on her face and James hated it. He had been so stupid letting some of the truth
slip in about his and Regulus’s relationship. He had just had an amazing night with Reg and he sort
of wanted someone to know. Even though he hadn't really planned on telling her, once she had
asked he couldn't help himself. He knew that the professor would never tell anyone, but it didn't
change the fact that she knew.

Today was not a good day for him to decide to tell anyone, let alone a professor. Besides, it made
him feel even shittier that he had told someone about his secret relationship on the day his friends
were demanding he tell them.

He hated today. It had been the absolute worst day of his life, but he knew the only way to get his
friends to forgive him was to tell them the truth and he couldn't do that. Even if he wanted to tell
them, Regulus certainly didn't want anyone to know so he just couldn't. He wouldn't break
Regulus’s trust like that when it was so hard to earn the little that he had.

James had thought all day about what he could do to fix his problem with his friends. He had come
up with a solution. While he couldn't tell them the full truth, he could tell them some of the truth.
He just hoped they would still accept him after he did.
******************************************************************************

Sirius

Sirius had never realized how much he talked to James in a single day until he wasn't talking to
him. Although it had only been a day Sirius found himself longing to tell James about this joke he
had thought of in Herbology. He regretted not laughing at James' joke in Transfigurations, but he
couldn't back down yet. Not until James told him the truth. James had never been one to lie and
now he seemed to be lying all the time. Sirius missed the old James.

It's not that Sirius cared what James was getting up to with his lady friend, in fact, he didn't even
care who James’s “bunny” was. He just cared that James couldn't even be honest about having a
girlfriend. Sirius had been very worried about James last night, he had thought James was dead in
Hogsmeade or something, but it turned out his friend was just being selfish. The word wasn't
something Sirius used to describe his friend often, but today it was accurate.

James had never been in an actual relationship. He had flings with girls occasionally and he had
been pining over Lily Evans for years, but it was clear that he was pining over someone new now.
Even though James had denied it, Sirius had seen James’s dopey grin each and every time he came
back from one of the disappearances. James Potter was getting laid, regularly.

He had an actual relationship with someone and he didn't feel like he could share it with Sirius.
That's what hurt the most, if Sirius was honest. His best friend in the world was finally in a
relationship and one that clearly made him happy, and he didn't want to share that with Sirius.

Sirius looked at James like a brother, since he and his real brother could never discuss these things.
He had hoped James would be able tell him these things but it appears he was wrong. He wasn't
quite sure what he had done to cause James to distrust him.

No matter what, James wasn't the type to hide his affection from anyone. Not even his friends, so
why was James hiding his relationship with this mysterious girl? Is she afraid of being discovered?
Did she somehow not find James good enough? Or did James not find her worthy of his public
affection? Sirius really hoped not as that would cause him to lose a great amount of respect for his
best friend. He didn't think he would. James had always been accepting of everyone. There would
be nobody that James wouldn't accept.

Unless what if James didn't want to tell anybody about his relationship because it was with a
Slytherin? Sirius knew that Remus hated it when he judged Slytherins without knowing them. He
knew Remus told him multiple times, hundreds of times, possibly that not all Slytherins were bad,
but Sirius never believed him because Remus didn't experience the same things Sirius did. He
didn't grow up in a house full of Slytherins. He didn't know the manipulations, lying, and scheming
they did to get what they wanted. He didn't know the coldness as Sirius did.

James had always been on the same page as Sirius on this matter, that is why this was all so
confusing. James had always believed that Slytherin’s were evil and now he was possibly dating
one. Was that why he didn't want to tell Sirius he was in a relationship because he thought James
would judge him for being with a Slytherin? He hoped that James knew him better than that.

Sirius had been so scared last night when they couldn't find James. He wasn't on the map and he
never disappeared without giving them some excuse, whether it was a lie or not. Sirius had slept
terribly, waking up every thirty minutes to check if James was back. He had almost insisted they
go to the hospital wing to see if James had been hurt, but Moony told him they could check in the
morning.

That hadn't been necessary of course because James was back by six-thirty. Throughout the entire
time, Sirius was worried about James’s safety, his best friend was snuggled up to his bunny. That
made Sirius angrier than it should, but how could James let them worry about him all night? Was
he so attached to this chick that he didn't even think about his friends all night?

Maybe he really was into this girl. Sirius had noticed James made more of an effort to dress nicer
these days and he started using the cologne his mother had gotten him for Christmas that he swore
he'd never use. Sirius was honestly happy that James had found someone, but why did he have to
mess up his friendships over it.

Now Sirius didn't mind that James had a girlfriend, he loved it. He never wanted to tell this to
James, but everybody was getting a little tired of his fawning over Lily Evans. Now Sirius could
admit she was a brilliant girl and he personally rather liked her, but Sirius had never really seen
cause for James’s obsession.

He personally always thought Marlene was more interesting, though he never would have expected
James to like Marlene, they were too similar. James needed someone different from him, but
someone who could still make him happy. Maybe this new Slytherin bunny was it.

That was another thing Sirius struggled with lately. His breakup with Marlene was seamless and
they were on fantastic terms. Lately, Marlene had been confiding in him very often about her
growing friendship with Dorcas Matthews. She seemed happy and he was really glad. When they
were dating, he often only saw her anger and sadness for days at a time, he liked when she was
happy.
He had to admit he thought he was happier now too. He had great friends, minus his whole issue
with James. Remus and he were growing closer, although he often caught Remus looking at him
longer than was strictly necessary. Sirius sometimes wondered whether Remus found him
attractive. Sirius knew that he was handsome, but he wasn't sure if Remus was attracted to him or
not. Remus was gay, which there was nothing wrong with, of course, but sometimes Sirius
wondered if Remus ever thought about any of his friends when he wanked.

Remus never showed any inclination towards the three of them in a sexual way. For a long time,
Sirius had wondered if Remus found anyone attractive. That was until he saw Remus with his hand
shoved down some seventh-year Ravenclaw’s pants in the previous year.

Sirius remembered it like it was yesterday. James and Peter were off getting snacks because they
were supposed to be planning a new prank, but for some reason, Moony hadn't shown up quite yet.
So Sirius told them that he would go look for him. He had grabbed the map and when he saw
Remus with somebody that he didn't know he decided to go get his friend himself.

He wasn't sure why he didn't consider the fact that Remus could be hooking up with someone.
Maybe it was because Remus had never really shown any sort of attraction toward anyone in front
of Sirius. Sirius had stupidly opened the door without knocking, and from then on he didn't doubt
Remus’s ability to be attracted to anyone. For days until Sirius groveled for Remus to forgive him
and eventually he did. Even though Sirius had been concerned astRemus being with a pervert, he
still wanted his friend to forgive him. The Ravenclaw was two years older than Remus, way too
old, but when Sirius had voiced his concerns to Remus, he had been politely told to fuck off.

Remus often thought about that memory, but it had been brought to the surface again when Remus
began getting close to another boy. Sirius had seen him walking down the halls with a Hufflepuff in
their year named Matt. Matt and Remus always walked very close and talked quietly to each other.
Maybe on the surface, it was nothing but Sirius could tell Remus had feelings for the boy.

He had felt queasy when he saw them and for a moment he thought he was turning into a bigot
until he realized it wasn't because they were two guys, but because Matt was clearly not good
enough for Remus. That was part of the reason Sirius had gone to Remus’s study group, not that he
told Moony this, but he had wanted to check out Matt.

Matt was there and had sat way too close to Remus, for a study session. Just as Sirius expected,
Matt was a slimy git that constantly craved Remus’s attention. Sirius hated him and he really
hoped Remus wouldn't keep him around long.

Speaking of Remus, he and Peter had spent the entire day trying to calm Sirius down and it was not
working all that well.

“Come on Sirius, I know you're mad and I'm mad too. He was a total git last night and this
morning, but-”

Sirius cut Remus off, “That's the thing, Moony! He was a git and a god damn liar. I mean, does he
really expect us to believe that he fell asleep in the Astronomy tower during his walk?”

Peter jumped in, “Yeah that's a load of crap especially since he had a love bite on the side of his
neck when he came back.”

Sirius turned to Peter shocked, “I didn't see it. The love bite, where is it?”

Peter rolled his eyes, “That's because you were busy yelling at him. There's a clear love bite, on his
left side, look. It's obvious he was with somebody last night. I can't believe he had the audacity to
lie with that thing on his neck.”

Sirius peered across the table at James who was talking to Frank while he was eating dinner. Then
he saw it, it was large and dark purple, “How the hell did I miss that?”

“Maybe because you were blistering mad this morning?” Remus drawled.

“Yeah, well, you guys were plenty mad last night too. I mean come on, do you know how long we
looked? I got the worst sleep of my life. Do you see how I look today? Not effortlessly beautiful at
all, just plain beautiful.”

Remus and Peter both rolled their eyes and Sirius secretly longed for the laugh he would usually
get from James, but he ignored this feeling and continued talking, “I'm just so sick of the lies. I'm
sick of our supposed best friend sneaking off with some bunny and refusing to tell us anything
about it or where he has been.”

Peter looked at him curiously, “You don't think it's a Slytherin girl, do you?”

“That's the exact thought I had, Wormy. Why else would he not want to tell us?”
Peter nodded in agreement, but Remus spoke next, “Yeah, why would James not wanna tell the
biggest Slytherin basher in school that he’s in a relationship with one of them?”

Sirius blushed, he hated when Remus made him feel childish, “I will admit that I'm going to be
disappointed if it is a Slytherin, I mean talk about bad taste, but it's not as if I'm going to be rude to
her or anything. I'm not going to ruin our friendship because he's dating some snake pit chick. I am
just mad he won't tell me the truth.”

“Maybe he just wants his privacy.”

“Moony, this is James. Does he seem like somebody who likes to be alone?”

“Right you are, Peter. James would want to flaunt his relationship with whoever it was, but for
some reason, he's not. He won't even tell us. It’s not like we’d tell anyone.”

After he thought for a second he looked at Peter, and he rolled his eyes and argued, “I wouldn't tell
anyone anything about my best friends, obviously.”

Remus responded before Sirius could apologize, “Of course you wouldn't Wormy. Sirius is just
tense, he doesn't really think you would.”

Peter looked at Sirius for confirmation and Sirius nodded his head in agreement, which put Peter in
a substantially better mood. Sirius sighed, “ Look, I know you guys don't like ignoring him and if
you want to stop, you definitely can. I'm sorry that I forced you to do this but-”

Peter spoke suddenly, “You act like we're not mad too. We're bloody pissed and have no problem
ignoring him, but what are we gonna do if he doesn't ever cave?”

Sirius shrugged, not having an answer to that. He hadn't considered that James might not ever agree
to tell them the truth.

“That's a good point, Peter. It's not as if we can ignore him forever. He's our best friend and yes,
he's being a fucking prat right now, but if he doesn't end up wanting to tell us we're going to have
to respect that.” Remus, ever the voice of reason, voiced his opinion.
Sirius felt himself getting tetchy, “But I don't want to respect that. I don't want to respect that my
best friend can't even tell me that he's in a relationship. I don't even need a name, I just need him to
tell me where he is going every night so that if he gets hurt we can find him.”

The rest of the Marauders nod along with him in agreement. Then Peter had decided that it was
time for a change of subject before everything became more depressing. He began talking about his
theory on why Mary and her latest boyfriend broke up. Sirius had to admit it did distract him for a
while.

*****************************************************************************

Sirius had fumed all day and he wasn’t any closer to forgiving his supposed best friend, but he was
curious about where he was. James had skipped their last class of the day, History of Magic. Sirius
mused darkly whether James was meeting up with the neck biter or not. He probably was and that
annoyed Sirius. He wasn’t sure why this made him any angrier than he already was, but it did.
James's inability to share details or be honest about his girlfriend was the reason this argument had
started.

Maybe it was because he and the rest of the marauders were putting so much effort into ignoring
him and he had the audacity to go meet his bunny and enjoy himself. It made Sirius rage and rant
to Remus later that night. Peter had escaped shortly after the rant began to go to the bathroom for a
shower. James was still not back, of course.

“I mean come on we are sitting here waiting for him to apologize for sneaking around and there he
is right back to the same ways. It’s despicable. I mean does he even care that we spent all day
ignoring him. Doesn’t he want us to forgive him?”

He paused briefly to let Remus respond, “Well I think-”

Sirius interrupted again not being able to contain his anger, “I mean how can someone be so
selfish! I can’t believe that good old James is acting like such a spoiled prick. I mean he sneaks off
into the middle of the night and just expects us to know where he is and not worry about him?”

Remus cut him off, “That enough Sirius. I am sure James has reasons, however idiotic and
misguided they might be. He hates the silent treatment. He will tell us soon, but for now, you need
to stay calm.”
Sirius glared at his friend in betrayal, “ I am bloody calm. Cant you fucking tell?”

Remus rolled his eyes and began reading his book. Seemingly, now giving Sirius the silent
treatment. Sirius hated that. He had been pacing the room as he ranted and now he joined Remus
on his bed, sitting next to him leaning his head on the taller boy's shoulder.

Remus said nothing, but he also made no move to shake Sirius off. Sirius sighed deeply and gave
in, “Okay I am sorry Moony. I am being moody.”

Remus snorted, “More like petulant.”

Sirius gasped dramatically and began to speak in an imitation of an American Southern belle and
moved his head off the boy's shoulder so Remus could see his mockingly hurt expression, “Well, I
never! You apologize right this instant young man.”

Remus couldn't help but crack a smile, which turned into a full-blown laugh when Sirius screwed
his expression up in haughty mock disapproval.

Sirius found himself staring at Remus as he laughed. His laugh was so loud and deep, Sirius
realized he never wanted to stop listening to it. It was like music to his ears and he vowed that he
would make a specialized effort to make Moony laugh more often.

The boys were sort of joking around and laughing now. And Sirius found himself forgetting about
what had been one of his worst days at Hogwarts. That is until that bastard James Potter walked in.
The boys instantly stopped laughing and stared at their supposed friend as he stood in the doorway
looking back at them.

Then Sirius turned his head away from James, making it clear he would not be speaking to him
until he heard an explanation. James spoke anyways, but not very loudly, which made Sirius
wonder if they were supposed to hear him, “This has been the worst day of my life. Fuck….. Ya
know what, fuck this.”

Sirius, who was still turned away from James, made eye contact with his Remus and they both
looked confused until Remus finally shrugged.
Then James spoke again loudly, to everyone, “Peter! Come out here Peter, I need to talk to you.”

Sirius wondered how James had known Peter was in the bathroom, then again you don't live with
someone for five years and do not know their habits. Peter came out in slightly damp clothes and
was drying his hair with a towel. He looked at James and nodded, James motioned for him to sit
next to Remus and Sirius. Peter did after the two boys moved over.

Now Sirius was practically pressed into Remus’s side, which made him feel extremely awkward
and oddly fluttery. James pulled a desk chair in front of them and sat down on it.

He sat there and stared at them for a minute before Sirius had had enough of waiting, “Well are
you going to tell us where you were last night? Or are you making us wait so you can think of
another lie?”

Sirius felt a little bad at his accusation when James flinched, but Sirius was too angry with his
friend to be polite. James sighed and was fidgeting his fingers in his lap, revealing his nerves to
Sirius, before he spoke, “Uhm. Okay, so. Uh I-I am sorry I have been lying to you guys lately. It's
not that I want to, I really don't. You know me, I hate lying-.”

“Then why are you doing it so much?” Surprisingly it wasn't Sirius who cut James off but Peter.
Maybe Sirius had been so blinded by his own rage he hadn't realized his friends were just as hurt
by James’s behavior lately.

James stuttered out, “Uh I- I okay let me get this out before anyone else speaks and I lose my
nerve. I have been seeing someone like you guys thought I was. No, I am not going to tell you who
it is. There is a reason I take the map with me when we meet and I would've done it the other day
too but I hadn't planned on meeting them.” Sirius didn't miss the lack of the female pronoun used as
James continued, “I also had not planned on being out so late last night otherwise I would've given
you guys a better excuse than that I was out for a walk, so I am sorry about that.”

Remus asked the question next, “So why do you not want to tell us who you were with? Are you
embarrassed by them?”

Sirius once again noticed that Remus didn't specify a gender either, meaning he also picked up on
James's pronoun usage earlier. Peter didn't say anything, just sat there taking it all in.
“I am not embarrassed by them, I promise, but it's complicated. They also don't want anyone to
know so even if I wanted to tell you, I couldn't without breaking their trust.”

Remus and Peter nodded understandingly, but Sirius was still a bit mad. None of this changed the
fact that James had lied to them for weeks, “So instead you break our trust? Listen I understand if
you are okay with being someone’s dirty little secret, but that doesn't mean you couldn't have just
told us you were meeting someone. We weren't asking for details, we just wanted to know where
you were.”

Sirius regretted what he said pretty quickly when James suddenly looked like he was about to cry,
“I am so sorry Sirius, and to Peter and Remus too. I know I have acted like a right arse lately and I
seriously regret that. I have just been so caught up in the excitement of being with him- um I mean
them.”

James flushed dark red and everyone was silent waiting for James to say something, but he didn't
so Remus did instead, “James, is your um friend a boy?”

James nodded and looked down into his lap for a moment, when he looked up he was blinking
back tears. That was all it took for Sirius to forgive all the lies and secrets immediately. He stood
up and scooped his friend up into a tight hug and whispered in his ear, “I forgive you, Jamie. I love
you brother.”

Peter and Remus each gave James a hug and said their own words to him as well. It was all very
mushy and so un-marauder-like until Peter mentioned the love bite on James's neck. James had
squawked and ran to the bathroom to check it out. Then he spent the rest of the night complaining
about how he had walked around the school all day with it and no one had told him.

Later that evening Sirius did something he hadn't done in at least a year. He crawled into James's
bed with him. He wanted to let James know that he loved him and wanted him to be happy.

The boys sat next to each other leaning against the headboard and did not say anything for a long
time until James spoke, “Do you really think he thinks of me as his dirty little secret?”

Sirius instantly felt guilty for the cruel words he had said to his friend in his rage, “No mate of
course he doesn't. And if he does then he's a fucking idiot.”

James smiled at him, “He's not an idiot. He’s actually very smart.”
Sirius rolled his eyes, not sure he was in the right mood to discuss too many details about James’s
boyfriend with him, “That may be so, but I have my doubts since he's trying to keep your
relationship a secret.”

James got defensive, which surprised Sirius, “His family is very strict and would definitely not
accept him being gay or bisexual or whatever. Plus I have never actually asked him to go public
with me or anything. I am not even sure if I want that.”

Sirius couldn't help his curiosity, “How long have you two been dating?”

James scoffed, “ We are definitely not dating. We just sort of meet up and fool around and
sometimes hang out.”

“Wow, you have a fuck buddy, Jamie. I never would've guessed.”

“He is NOT a fuck buddy. It's just okay so we started this as sort of a chance for both of us to
experiment with guys and see what we liked. And we have been doing that, but sometimes we just
talk, and it's almost as good as the sexual stuff, you know?”

Sirius raised his eyebrow, he had definitely not experienced that with any of his previous
girlfriends, “No, sorry Prongs. I have no idea how that could be just as good.”

James laughed, “Yeah I mean the other stuff is really good too, but I just sort of love getting to
know him. He’s just so interesting.”

“So how did it start, like how did you decide to experiment with each other?”

Sirius had no idea why he was so interested in this, but he was. James shrugged slightly, “Well we
were sort of arguing, and then I just kissed him or he kissed me, I am still not sure. But basically, it
led to us doing more, and then I made it clear to him that I was interested in more.”

Sirius nodded suddenly, reflecting on the bravery of his friend, to just kiss another man in the
middle of an argument, not knowing what the outcome could be. He found himself envying that
courage and envying the relationship James had where talking could be just as exciting as fooling
around. He was more eager than ever to find someone with whom he could share that type of
relationship.
 Tutoring?
Chapter Notes

Sorry, this is so late, I had finals last week so it took me a bit to focus on writing my
next chapter. I already have some of the next chapter written so I should be getting
back on schedule here. I did add an original character in this chapter, which I know
can be iffy, but I just felt like Reggie needed some support in his life. Hope you guys
enjoy the chapter!

Regulus

Regulus was startled when he woke up to see James looking down at him from the side of the bed,
clearly having just got out of the bed himself. He couldn't believe that he had been foolish enough
to fall asleep last night with James Potter of all people.

He wasn't even sure how it had happened. They had spent the night talking and Regulus supposed
he had fallen asleep, but he didn't remember drifting off. Regulus just remembered feeling the
strange impulse to tell James about himself and more importantly how captivated he was as James
was telling him about his own happy childhood. Regulus didn't remember the last time he had
talked to someone so much in one night, he supposed he hadn't done that since Sirius and he were
kids.

He had really enjoyed talking to James, more than he did with most people. He wasn’t sure why
but James was really easy to talk to and last night it hadn’t felt possible that James and he could
ever be enemies. In fact, he had felt like one of the few allies Regulus had. Granted they hadn’t
discussed politics, the war, or his family but they had talked about other things. Important things
that Regulus had never told anyone. Things he wouldn’t dare tell even his closest friends.

He had told James about hide and seek when Regulus and Sirius were kids. How Regulus would
hide in the same spot every time and how Sirius would pretend not to see him, so Regulus could
win. It was one of those stories about his childhood with Sirius that had yet to be tainted by
anything and it was one of his favorite memories. He was glad that someone else knew about it
now, as he was sure Sirius had never told James about it.

Regulus wasn’t sure why but lately when he had been with James, especially last night, he felt
inexplicably free. Weightless almost as if the rest of the world sort of fell away, which was
probably because Potter’s idiocy distracted him so often. Either way, he found he quite liked the
feeling. It was something he had never felt before, even if it did only last for short periods of time.
Regulus knew that if James and he actually discussed politics then the feeling would go away, as
there was no way the Gryffindor would be able to hold his tongue when it came to his opinions on
Regulus’s family.

So Regulus was determined to not mention unpleasant topics around James, in an attempt to keep
that free feeling a little longer. Somehow the most egotistical boy Regulus knew was the perfect
company. James was definitely still a cocky shit, but Regulus found he didn’t mind that. Not that
he would ever tell anyone that. The idea of anyone knowing that he was friendly with James was
alarming, to say the least. Friendly definitely wasn’t the right word, but it was all Regulus could
think of at the moment.

They certainly weren't friends. Merlin no, they could never be friends and they weren't dating by
any means, but to call James a hookup wasn't exactly accurate any longer either. Seeing as they had
spent an entire night together and yes, they had hooked up, but it was only a small portion of their
night. James had come to find Regulus and comfort him, while his closest friends had not.

Regulus didn't know why, but that made him feel tingly. Thinking of James sometimes made his
stomach feel funny and it alarmed him. James Potter was an enigma and he confused Regulus.
Regulus couldn't stop thinking about him. He knew he needed to because eventually this was going
to end and he was going to lose one of his few companions in life. He had very few and if he
allowed James to take one of those spots then it would be devastating to lose him.

There was Kreacher, his family house-elf. He loved Kreacher. Kreacher had raised him, while his
parents had not and Regulus would always feel a special bond with him for it. Unfortunately, as he
got older Kreacher began treating him more like a young master than a friend like Regulus had
always wanted. So there was a limit to what Regulus could tell him and be sure it didn’t get back to
his parents.

There was Barty Crouch jr. who was Regulus's best friend. He had the most in common with
Regulus. They were both sarcastic, pessimistic, intelligent, and had both grown up in wealthy
pureblood families. Believe it or not, Barty was actually the most accepting person in Regulus’s
life. He never judged Regulus for his fears and goals in life. Although he often told Regulus that he
thought he shouldn’t stress himself out over what his parents told him. The problem was that Barty
hated his father so much that he was determined to be the opposite of him. He would never accept
Regulus fraternizing with a known blood traitor. He would not be able to see Regulus’s point of
view in the matter at all. So that made him less than ideal to vent to, especially about James.

There was also Evan Rosier, who although in the past was one of Regulus’s closest confidants, had
been straying away from Barty and him this year. Instead, he was spending more and more time
with people like Mulciber and Snape, which Regulus thought was a huge step back in friend
quality. Evan had always been the jokester to Regulus and Barty’s serious nature, but now Evan
was becoming more serious himself. Sirius about things like blood supremacy and the dark lord.
Regulus wasn’t sure if he would ever be able to tell his friend something personal again without
fearing that Snape would find out.
Regulus tried to ponder if he had any more people he could genuinely call a companion. He wasn’t
a very open person, so he wasn’t surprised when he found himself unable to think anymore. Well,
actually there was Remy Crest.

Remy Crest was a Hufflepuff in Regulus’s year, who had been his deskmate in arithmancy since
the third year. Regulus’s other friend never took that class so he had been seated alone the first day
of class until Remy had requested to sit next to him. She had been sitting there ever since, not that
Regulus minded much. She was actually a very nice girl and surprisingly it never annoyed him
when she talked to him. Their companionship had started slowly throughout the years, but as time
went on the two talked more and more. He wouldn’t call her a friend, considering they only ever
talked in class, but he did enjoy her company. She was always relaxed, which was something
Regulus was almost never. She was intelligent but never flaunted it or tried to make another feel
inferior which was so distinctly not Slytherin that it had shocked Regulus at first.

She would often ask him to join her in activities outside of class, but he always declined. Not
because he didn’t like her, but because he didn’t really think he needed another friend. Besides she
had plenty of friends, he wasn’t really sure why she would want to be friends with him anyway.

Her real name was actually Remlina, but she absolutely despised the name so she went strictly by
Remy. If people called her Remlina, she simply ignored them. He had learned that the hard way
when they had first started Arithmancy and had accidentally called her that, which led to her
refusing to work with him for the week. He never made that mistake again.

He wondered if James would like Remy. He probably would, Remy was much cooler than Regulus
and James still liked him. Well, at least he thought James did. I mean why else would the boy
spend his entire night with Regulus rather than his friends. James would probably like her strictly
because the more time Regulus spent with her, the less time he spent with Barty or Evan. James
despised those two, even though he had no valid reason other than that Sirius did. Regulus thought
it was rather rude of James to take Sirius’s word as gospel when it came to Regulus’s friends. Who
was he to judge Regulus for his choice of friends? Then again Regulus sure as hell judges James on
his choice of friends, especially because one of them was Sirius.

He had had a lovely night with James last night, much to his surprise. James had actually managed
not to piss him off for the entire night, which had to be a record between them for sure. He had
actually ended up sharing a lot with James last night and James had done the same. Even though he
felt a bit queasy thinking about the personal details he had told James, he didn’t think he regretted
it. Sure it could backfire on him pretty badly but it had just felt so freeing to tell someone things
that he never told anyone.

He felt pretty bad about how he had acted in the morning though. James hadn’t deserved Regulus’s
bitchy comment about him not telling his friends where he was. He also hadn’t deserved Regulus
running out as he did, but he hoped James understood why he had rushed off. He was so focused
on how much trouble he was going to be in that he hadn’t been the nicest to James and he even had
run off without his tie. He would probably have to go back to the room sometime to look for his
tie. He had promised James that he wouldn’t go back without him, so he would probably have to
wait, unfortunately.

The professors were probably going to be livid at him. After all, he had not only missed dinner but
also skipped out of his study session and missed curfew. He was going to be in so much trouble, in
fact, they would probably put him back on academic watch like he had been for the first few weeks
after the incident. Just when he was finally getting a bit more freedom and trust, he fucks it up.

Rationally, he knew he lashed out at James because not only was he worried, but he blamed James
in a way. Even though James had nothing to do with him skipping dinner or missing out on part of
his study session, James had kept him out later, though Regulus had basically asked for that.
Regulus had really appreciated the distraction that James caused. He didn't know why his parent’s
letter affected him so much when he knew he shouldn't take anything they say to heart as he knew
they were just frustrated with him. He knew that he would get over it soon enough like he always
did.

After Regulus had left the Room of Requirement, he had gone straight to the dungeons and tried to
make himself look more presentable. He certainly did not want anyone to find him looking like
he’d been with someone all night. Considering he had never done that before and they’d have all
kinds of questions.

When he got back to his dorm room, his roommates were still asleep so he hopped right in the
shower. He attempted to wash the smell of James Potter off of him. The smoky smell of his
cologne and his distinctly woodsy shampoo, that Regulus considered quite plebeian. Although he
had to admit it was becoming a more comforting smell the more time he spent around James.

Once he had washed his body, he worked on getting his hair into shape. James had run his hands
through it multiple times, the last night and Regulus wanted the evidence of that gone. Regulus had
a few love bites, thankfully only on his hip and chest, but those were easy enough to cover. He
cringed at the memory of leaving a few love bites on James’s neck the night before and he really
hoped the idiot had enough sense to use a glamor on them before going to class. Then again, even
if he didn’t there was no way that they would suspect it was Regulus, so whatever.

Once Regulus felt he was normal-looking and well prepared for school, he stepped out of the
bathroom.

He was met by Barty Crouch’s cold stare as he sat on the edge of his bed having just woken up,
“Where were you all night? “

Regulus feigned confusion, “What do you mean? I was here.”

Barty rolled his eyes and his response dripped in sarcasm, “ Yeah, cause I totally believe that.”

Regulus wanted to slap his hand against his own forehead at his own stupidity. Of course, Barty
wasn't an idiot. Maybe if he was talking to Evan he could have gotten away with bullshitting his
way through, but Barty knew him better than that, “Alright sorry. I was out, but now I am back. No
harm done.”

Barty stood up and started walking towards Regulus, “While, I think it's great that you were out
actually doing something besides reading, the prefects totally noticed you weren’t here. I tried to
tell them you were in the bathroom, but they insisted on waiting until you got out. And obviously,
you never came out.”

Regulus felt warmth in his stomach for his friend. Sometimes he forgot how good a friend Barty
was. The boy could be cold and ruthless if you made him mad, but he really cared about Regulus,
“Thank you for doing that. I know I'm going to be in deep shit unfortunately I didn't think of it last
night and there’s not much I can do now.”

He must have noticed something vulnerable about Regulus, because his friend stepped closer and
placed his hand on Regulus’s shoulder, looking him in the eyes seriously, “Is this about the letter
you got yesterday? Did your mom say something?”

Regulus was taken aback. He hadn’t expected his friends to be able to tell when he got a letter from
his parents, or at least not been able to guess that it usually didn’t put him in a good mood. Then
again Barty was very observant, so he really shouldn’t be surprised.

The lack of response from Regulus was all the response that Barty needed, “Hey, I know she’s
your mother, and she wants the best for you, but that doesn’t mean you need to take everything she
says to heart isn’t always right and doesn’t always know exactly what is right for you, okay?”

Barty didn't understand. He didn't understand because while he had a shitty father who for all
intents and purposes wished Barty didn't exist, he had a mother who loved him. His mother loved
him more than anything and the two were extremely close. Regulus had been jealous more than a
few times listening to his friend talk about his mother and what they did during the breaks. Regulus
didn't have a mother or father who loved him, hell or a brother even. He had always hoped that
somewhere deep down his mother cared for him a bit but as he got older he began doubting it even
more. After her last letter, he was certain of it, but he also knew that she wanted the best for him
even if she didn't love him. Wasn't that even more important?

He figured the easiest way to deal with Barty was to tell him what he expected of Regulus, “Yeah,
I know. It wasn’t a big deal or anything, I just needed some time alone.”

Barty stepped back and raised his eyebrow in question, “So you were alone. I had assumed maybe
you had found a girl to drown your sorrows in. Maybe you actually have started to enjoy life a bit?”

Regulus chuckled slightly, “I don't know where you get this idea that I don't have a life. No, I
wasn't with a girl, but that doesn't mean I don’t have a life.”

Barty laughed loudly as he began getting dressed for school, “I think it does. Come on Regs, you
need to start grabbing life by the balls. Find a girl and take her to bed. It’s easy, if you’re going to
break your little rules then you might as well make it worth it.”

What about a boy? Regulus thought darkly. He would love to say that just to see how his friend
would react, but of course, he didn’t. His preservation skill was too intact for that kind of gamble.

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Merlin doesn’t remind me of my regulations. I am going to be in so much
shit.”

Barty laughed at Regulus's situation, while Regulus began to arrange his school bags, chatting with
his friend until their third roommate woke up.

Evan was not a morning person and he grumbled until the three made it down to breakfast.
Suddenly he was in a better mood while Regulus got continually worse the closer he got to class
time.

******************************************************************************************

When Regulus stepped into Transfigurations, he was preparing for the worst. The minute he laid
eyes on Minerva McGonagall, his stomach clenched in fear. He didn't know what to expect. He'd
never broken his safety regulations before and last night he had broken more than once, he had a
feeling the outcome would not be good. If the professor’s reaction when he had actually had his
little mental break was any indication, then he was thoroughly screwed.
He sat up in the front of the class like he always did and Evan sat next to him, but nothing
happened. Professor McGonagall didn’t say anything to him the entire class period, in fact, she
hadn’t even looked at him. He didn’t know if he should be worried or relieved by her reaction, so
he went with worry. This could mean they were going to send him to be dealt with by the
headmaster. Regulus really hoped not. He had never liked professor Dumbledore and he tried to
avoid him more than anything. The man was a mix between insane and a manipulative genius and
that scared Regulus a bit. When class ended and he still hadn’t been told anything by professor
McGonagall, it looked like he might be okay. He was still waiting for the other shoe to drop but he
allowed himself a deep breath as the students around him began to gather their books.

“Mr. Black, would you mind staying after class for a few minutes?”

And there was the sound of the other shoe dropping. He could only imagine what kind of scolding
he was in store for. He turned towards her with a tight smile on his face, “Of course professor.”

As the class was clearing out, Regulus put his stuff in his bag and grabbed it, ready to run if things
got bad. He walked up to professor McGonagall’s desk and waited for her to begin yelling. She
didn’t, instead, she leveled him with a curious gaze. They sat there for a minute in an awkward
silence that made him a little uncomfortable. He wondered if she was waiting for him to confess

So after a couple of minutes, he finally decided that confessing was better than this torture,
“Professor, if this is about me missing curfew and supper I’m so sorry I really-”

She interrupted him, much to his surprise, “No Mr. Black, It's not about that. Mr. Potter explained
everything to me and I completely understood.”

Regulus was frozen. James had explained everything to her, what? What did he explain? Was he
not getting in trouble? What had James told her? What could he have possibly said without
breaking Regulus’s trust?

Regulus’s mind raced with the possibilities, until professor McGonagall spoke once more, “I
wanted to discuss the tutoring more than anything.”

Regulus took a moment to realize what the professor had said, tutoring?

Professor McGonagall spoke once more, “Yes, I know the tutoring is a bit of a secret, but I need to
make sure you are being smart about it. Not overworking yourself by putting too much on your
plate. It’s very sweet of you to help Mr. Potter like this, especially with your own OWL’s coming
up, but remember your health comes first. There is a reason we had to regulate your studying and
just because it is not your own schoolwork does not mean you will not get stressed out from it. I
just need to make sure you are aware of that.”

Regulus had never felt so confused in his life. The professor thought that he was sweet…..because
he was tutoring James Potter. James had told professor McGonagall that Regulus had missed
dinner and curfew because he was busy tutoring James and somehow they are okay with it? That
was possibly the stupidest thing James could have said and yet it completely and one hundred
percent worked.

“Uhm. Yes, Professor, I know it's extra work, but I just really think It's something that can help me
as a person. You know, to be a bit less selfish.”

She raised her eyebrow a bit as if she didn’t believe what Regulus was saying, “Well, that's very
wise of you Mr. Black and I tip my hat off to that endeavor. The main thing I need to discuss with
you though is that the staff and I will not allow you to slip back into old habits. I think it’s very
kind of you to do this for Mr. Potter, but if you feel yourself getting at all overwhelmed I need you
to tell me. The staff and I also recognize that you have been doing very well, despite missing your
mealtime and curfew last night, so we agreed that allowing you an extra couple of hours a week to
help someone else study shouldn’t be too overwhelming. Mr. Potter is also under strict orders to let
us know if he notices any signs of distress during your study times, so please don’t let it go that
far.”

Regulus couldn't believe it. James had not only gotten him out of trouble but he had also gotten him
extra studying time. Technically it was to tutor James, but James didn’t need his tutoring so he
could spend it studying if he wanted. Though he supposed James would have to be there, not that
Regulus minded that. He couldn’t believe how thoughtful James had been to do this. He had
somehow done it before Regulus even got the chance to be yelled at too. James had thought about
Regulus’s problems before his own this morning and that made Regulus ache to see him and thank
him.

“Yes, professor. Yes, I am aware of that.”

Professor McGonagall smiled at him, but had an odd expression in her eye, “Okay Mr. Black you
are free to go.” As he was about to turn to leave she said one more thing, “Just..please be careful
Mr. Black. That is all I am going to say.”

He gave her a tight-lipped smile and left the room, feeling rather confused by her last statement.
She wanted him to be careful? He understood that, but she had already warned him not to over
study so what was she telling him to be careful of now? He decided to ignore her last comment and
just be happy that he was off scotch-free. Plus he now had extra study time if he wanted it and
James had made it all possible.

Regulus was a bit late to Arithmancy because of his discussion with Professor McGonagall.
Professor Vector must’ve already been warned of this possibility because he just waved Regulus to
his seat and continued talking to the class.

Regulus went and sat at his desk next to Remy Crest. She shot him a curious look and he did
something very uncharacteristic of him, he smiled reassuringly at her. At first, she looked a bit
surprised but then she smiled back at him and turned back to listen to professor Vector. Regulus
found himself looking at Remy for a moment longer before turning back to the front of class
himself. He never really gave his relationship with Remy much thought until he had thought about
her being one of his few companions.

They didn't talk outside of class, but they talked a decent amount while in class. She was pretty
good to him and he appreciated that. She was one of the few people that had seemed genuinely
worried earlier in the year when he had been studying himself to exhaustion. He remembered how
she would encourage him to take a nap during class, offer to take notes for him, and one time she
had even brought him a snack to eat. He had been annoyed at the time but looking back it was
really sweet of her.

She had long dusty blonde curly hair, that usually was a cross between messy and controlled chaos.
She had slightly tanned skin than was typical in England, which he knew was from her mother who
happened to be from Spain. She had dark blue eyes and a bright white smile. Today her hair was
thrown into a messy bun and her uniform was skewed out of place. This was pretty common for
Remy, she never worried too much about dress code rules. Remy would generally wear her
uniform with other accessories that made it more personalized; she had told him once that she
hated the idea of being boring. Today she was wearing fishnet tights under her skirt and had
chunky cream-colored socks on with black boots. To top it off she had a baby blue sweater thrown
over her shirt. The outfit was a bit odd but he had to admit it looked pretty good on her. It sort of
expressed her personality. She wasn’t a rebel, nor was she a bookworm, and she wasn’t a prankster,
she was just Remy plain and simple.

She was pretty popular around the school for the people who knew her, though she never seemed
to be trying to collect a lot of friends. She was friendly and nice but overall she was just very chill
and Regulus figured people liked that about her. He knew that that was his favorite thing about her.
She never got stressed out during even their worst Arithmancy exams, while Regulus would sweat
profusely, which is not something he did a lot because it was disgusting. She would always attempt
to calm him down by telling him it wasn’t the worst thing in the world if he got some answers
wrong and he would still be the best in the class either way.
She was sweet about that stuff and she often complemented Regulus. She often would tell him that
he was intelligent, she'd tell him he was handsome, and a few times she had even told him he was
funny. Which was something Regulus had never been called in his life. Regulus had never received
as many compliments as he did from Remy, although James was quickly catching up. She never
seemed to expect anything from a compliment, she acted as if they were free. He supposed that for
her they were, but nothing in his life had ever come for free.

About halfway through the class period, Regulus was writing his notes when all of a sudden Remy
nudged his side. He looked over to her and her blue eyes were asking him a question, he just
wasn’t sure what it was.

He didn’t have to wait long to find out because a couple of seconds later in a low voice she asked,
“So should I ask why you are late or is that smile answer enough?”

She winked at him and he had no idea what that meant so he just answered her unasked question, “I
was in a meeting with Professor McGonagall.”

“Oh. Did you get in trouble for missing dinner last night?”

Regulus was confused. How had Remy noticed he wasn't at dinner last night? Their house tables
were nowhere near each other. He cocked his head at her in question, “What do you mean? How
did you know that?”

Remy rolled her eyes as if that was a ridiculous question, “Come on Regulus. I always keep track of
my friends, especially the ones who can't be trusted to eat enough on their own. Of course, I
noticed you weren’t there yesterday.”

Regulus was rendered speechless for the moment. Remy and he were friends? Regulus had a friend
that he hadn’t even known about? He was friends with someone his parents would undoubtedly
disapprove of, that part sort of excited him. He supposed that he should’ve known they were
friends. They talked every class period. He knew that she had three older brothers, adored
gobstones and that her mother had passed when she was five. He knew quite a lot about her, now
that he thought of it. Not as much as he knew about Barty and Evan but certainly more than he
knew about most people.

Regulus supposed he was no longer a two-friend person. He had three friends now and one of them
was female. Not that that was a problem, he had just never considered the possibility. He realized
that he hadn’t responded to her in a while, so he thought he better, “ Uhm, no. No, she wasn’t mad
at me, even though I was fully prepared to be yelled at. Instead, she decided to extend my study
time.”

She giggled quietly so that she didn’t disturb the rest of the class, “So let me get this straight. You
miss a scheduled mealtime that was set by the headmaster himself and somehow you end up
getting an extra hour of studying out of it. Wow, Black, you are good. I always knew Slytherin’s
were good at manipulating situations to their advantage, but you might be the best.”

Regulus found himself laughing a bit out of surprise until he received a glare from professor
Vector. Which had them both quieting down for a few minutes until Remy leaned over and
whispered, “Hey, do you want to go down to the greenhouses with me tomorrow?”

This was certainly not the first time Remy had asked him to join her at the greenhouses, perhaps
she thought he needed to relax. He always had made up an excuse as to why he couldn’t join her.
He wasn’t exactly the type of person to go down to the greenhouses. He had been there before with
Evan and Barty, but only a few times and he had never participated. He knew Remy visited the
greenhouse often and he wondered if it might be better to go down with her if he ever did want to
participate. It was probably a terrible idea but he found himself considering it. He wasn’t sure if it
was because of his good mood or if she had just caught him at the right moment.

He decided that since he had a new friend, he might as well spend some time with her outside of
class. So, against his better judgment, he nodded to her and he was pleasantly surprised to see her
smile brightly. He wasn’t sure why but it was nice to see someone smile at him and he sort of liked
seeing Remy happy.

“Wow, you are in a good mood.”

Regulus nodded a bit and then turned back to listen to Vector teach them arithmancy, hoping he
hadn’t just made a mistake.

******************************************************************************************

“So you're telling me that you got a perfect score on your last Ancient Ruins test? I thought I did
well when I only got docked a few points from the question on Egyptian ruins.”

Regulus smirked slightly at his….friend? He still wasn’t sure exactly what to call her yet. Remy
was pretty fun to talk to outside of class, much to Regulus’s surprise. He never really expected to
enjoy other people’s company, so when he did it was always a bit of a shock.
Regulus and his new friend were making their way down to the greenhouses, the day after
Arithmancy, just as Remy and he had planned. They had met in the courtyard and about halfway
down to their destination the conversation had shifted from awkward chit-chat to comfortable
discussion about their shared class.

He had known Remy was fairly intelligent before their walk began but now he was certain that she
was a lot more studious than he had thought. She just was a lot less obvious about her studying
habits. Like for example she had never been caught passed out in a stairwell because she over-
studied to the point of exhaustion.

“Yeah, I did but I will admit that those questions on Egyptian ruins did have me worried. Luckily
though I came out with a passable grade.”

She snorted loudly, “Yeah passable. Right like that was ever a worry for you. Aren’t you like a
genius or something?” Which caused Regulus to look away in sheepish embarrassment until she
laughed slightly and asked, “So have you ever been down to the greenhouses before?”

“Uh yeah I have been there with Barty and Evan, but only a couple of times.”

“Cool. I think I have seen Crouch down here before.”

“And let me guess, you're not a fan?” Regulus figured that she didn’t much like Barty as many
people did not like him unless they were friends with him. He could be devilishly cruel if he didn’t
care about your feelings, which was unfortunately how he felt toward most people.

She shrugged but didn’t look particularly bothered by the mention of him, “He’s okay. I mean he's
not a particularly nice guy, but I usually don't say anything to him and he doesn't say anything to
me. So it’s not a problem for me.”

He couldn't believe how relaxed Remy was about people. Regulus believed that it was pretty rare
for two people to treat each other like bees, you don’t bother them and they don’t bother you. No,
normally one of the people would bug the other until the bee-stung them and they learned their
lesson. He guessed that Remy didn’t feel she had a lesson to learn from someone like Barty.

He supposed maybe it was because Remy and Barty were a bit similar. Not their basic morals,
Remy was generally kind to people while Barty was naturally rude to them, but they were both
very laid back. They didn’t stress out over things, the way Regulus had been prone to do since he
was a kid.
He was interrupted from his thoughts when Remy spoke again, “Yeah, you just can’t let things like
that bug you. If someone tries to start an argument with me, I just let it roll off my back and move
on. There’s no use being angry about someone feeling about you because you certainly can’t
change them.”

Regulus had a hard time grasping that idea. He was usually very absorbent to other ideas but he had
a hard time grasping the idea that one could just not care what others thought. That someone could
just choose not to care. He figured it was because of the way he grew up that he struggled to grasp
the concept, he certainly had never been able to shake off his mother’s insults, “Yeah, but aren’t
you curious as to why they don't like you?”

“Oh, I know why they don't like me. They don't like me because I’m a pothead, they don't like me
because of who I'm friendly with, and sometimes they don't like me because I'm a half-blood.“

Regulus stared at her, a bit stunned at her nonchalance. She saw nothing wrong with what people
thought of her, or at the very least she wasn’t angry about it. It made him a bit sick to think of
being fully aware that people didn’t see her the same because of her blood status. He knew that his
friends and family would feel the same way and would undoubtedly be galled by his interactions
with her. He found that he didn’t care though. She wasn’t a half-blood, she was a nice girl and a
friend.

"Well, if you're okay with that then I guess you're doing a lot better than the rest of us."

She looked at him and shot him a reassuring smile, “Yeah, I think that that's something that we all
struggle with. When we're young we are taught to care about what everyone thinks, so that we can
fit in. We have this idea that we need to be someone else for others to like us, but once we realize
that we don’t need to change we are so much happier. In most cases, people like you more because
they know that you are genuine. Even if people didn’t like it, I don’t care anymore, I am not
changing myself for anyone.”

He smiled at her, a real genuine smile, “I like that.”

She smiled back, “I thought you might.”

They were nearing the greenhouses now and Regulus started to feel a bit nervous. He seldom came
here and he was sure to be out of place. Regulus. They went to one of the greenhouses in the back,
the one madam Pomfrey often neglected to check on. It was the perfect place for students to get
away from their worries. Remy marched into the building as if she had been there a hundred times,
which he supposed she probably had. He gave himself a split second for a nervous sigh before he
stepped into the building.

******************************************************************************************

It was safe to say Regulus had never felt this way before. He felt a bit like he was floating, but also
like he'd never been as grounded as he was now. Literally, he was lying on the ground with Remy
like twenty feet from the greenhouses. They were both staring up at the sky, trying to guess what
shapes of the clouds were forming.

He was so relaxed. He couldn’t remember the last time he had looked at the sky during the day.
Sometimes he'd look at the sky at night to see his family, but he never did that during the day. The
stars aren't out during the day. Or maybe they were, but just hidden by the sun? Oh, that was
interesting. He would have to do some research on where the stars go during the day. Maybe they
just disappeared? Or maybe they had invisibility cloaks they used to hide from humans? No that
was ridiculous, but what if it was true?

Regulus hadn't realized he was talking out loud until he heard Remy laugh loudly beside him, “The
stars aren't under invisibility cloaks, Reg. Invisibility cloaks don’t exist.”

He turned to her, slowly, he couldn’t believe how slowly he was moving. It felt as if it took him ten
minutes to turn his head and look at her. When he did she was looking at him already and they
stared in silence for a moment before he spoke. His lips moved slowly, forming the words he was
trying to say, “Yes, they are. I have seen one in person. Actually, I have been under it before.”

Suddenly she was moving very fast, he flinched at her swift movement. She leaned up on her
elbows and scooted closer to him. He could feel his eyes widening, becoming comically wide. She
was moving faster than anyone he had ever seen before loudly asking, “Where have you seen an
invisibility cloak?”

Regulus smiled at her deviously or at least he tried to. He wasn't 100% sure if it came out that way,
but he figured she’d get the point, “I can't tell you that. It's a secret.”

“Secret? Regulus Black, I didn't know that you had so many secrets. Wherever will you put them
all?”
Suddenly Regulus was laughing, way harder than was necessary, but it was funny. Fuck it was so
funny. He had way more secrets than anybody thought he did. Maybe they all thought he had a lot
of secrets, he wasn't sure but he was quiet so it was possible. Maybe they thought he was
mysterious, because of his silence. Not because he has a lack of stuff to say but he had secrets. He
laughed even harder at the thought.

He did have secrets though. The main one being James Potter. Remy had asked him where he
would put his secrets and he wasn’t sure, but he did know where he’d like to put Jamie.

Then Remy joined him in his laughter, and suddenly they were giggling like schoolgirls. Well, he
supposed Remy was a schoolgirl, not that she'd ever acted that way. They probably looked
ridiculous, not that Regulus cared at the moment. He was having too good a time.

Suddenly he heard his name, “Reggie?”

Where did that voice come from? Regulus looked to his left and right, but he didn't see anyone.
That wasn't Remy's voice. Had the voice been in his head? Oh, God was he going crazy now?
Madness ran rampant in the Black household, but he had always thought that it would be Sirius, not
him.

Abruptly Remy spoke, seemingly not Regulus. Maybe she was going crazy too, “Hey Remus,
Sirius. Lovely to see you boys out and about.”

Sirius? Regulus had a brother named Sirius. He rolled himself around, so he was on his stomach
and looked up towards the hill and sure enough a few feet in front of him was his brother and a tall
character. For some reason, he couldn’t place the tall kid’s name. He knew that he knew it, but for
some reason, he couldn’t pick it out of his thoughts.

The tall nameless boy responded to Remy, “Oh, hey Remy. Hey, Regulus. What are you guys up
to?”

Remy spoke again, she seemed to be fairly familiar with the tall boy, “Oh, nothing much. We were
just at the greenhouse a-”

Regulus interrupted, instantly feeling bad for interrupting his new friend, but he just had to know
this boy’s name, “I feel like I know you. What’s your name again?”
That tall character cleared his throat slightly about to answer, when Sirius suddenly spoke, “What
the fuck are you talking about Regulus? I am your brother.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, or at least he tried to but it probably came off more like he was having a
stroke than anything, “I know that Siri, obviously I was talking about the tall boy.”

Sirius looked absolutely indignant, he looked to the tall boy as if he would have some sort of
answer for him, before turning back to Regulus clearly unsatisfied with the response he got, “How
high are you, Reggie?”

“High? What? No, I am just hanging out with my new friend Remy.”

Remy giggled next to him, “New friend? We’ve been friends for years, Regulus.”

Sirius steadied them with a curious gaze, “Since when have you guys been friends? I've never seen
you together.”

“We have Arithmancy together and we’ve sat together for years. I-”

Regulus interrupted again, finally having gotten his answer to his internal question, “Remus! It’s
Remus, right? I knew that too! I apologize for my forgetfulness, but I do remember that you are
very smart and tall.”

Remus Lupin, who Regulus now recognized, tried to stifle a laugh, but Sirius shot him a livid glare
that had him quiet in an instant, “My god, Reg. You are such a mess. Let me see you.”

Regulus rolled on his back to give his brother a better view and Sirius stepped closer. He leaned
down towards Regulus and looked right into his eyes. Regulus took a second to marvel at how
similar his brother’s eyes were to his own, probably a product of the inbreeding. Sirius’s eyes,
although similar in color to Regulus’s, were warmer like a foggy day while Regulus always thought
of his own as the color of steel. He hoped James found some warmth in his eyes.

“Jesus, they're bloodshot.”

Remus spoke next, “Come on Sirius, don’t be so high and mighty. You were coming down here to
do the same thing.”
What were they coming down here to do?

Sirius bit back in a distinctly childish voice, “Well, that's different. He is my little brother and he's
way too young to be doing things like that.”

“Sirius, you've been coming down here since your 4th year.”

“It's different with him.”

“How so? Because he’s your little brother?”

Regulus interrupted, not liking the way the boys were discussing him as he wasn’t there, “Hey, I
am not little.”

Remy let out a burst of giggles next to him, “You kind of are, though.”

Regulus turned to her, now hearing the childish voice come from him instead of his brother,
“What? I'm a 183 cm, he's the short one.”

Regulus pointed to his brother. Sirius glared, “I am not short. I am of above-average height and you
are not taller than me, pipsqueak.”

Remus answered before Regulus had a chance, “Yes he is.”

Sirius glared at his friend, looking extremely put out.

Remy spoke again, “Not that you're short, Reg. But you're skinny and sort of petite. “

“Never refer to me as petite.”

Remy laughed, which made Regulus laugh. He didn't know why but her laugh was so contagious.

A silent conversation was taking place between Remus and Sirius. The boys stared at each other
for what felt like hours. He began to feel a bit uncomfortable at the intensity of their stares.

Eventually, Sirius sighed deeply and looked down at his brother, “Alright, enjoy yourself kid. And
you, make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.”

He pointed to Remy when he said the second part and then he leaned down and ruffled Regulus’s
hair. It made Regulus feel like such a little kid.

He called out to Sirius who now had an arm thrown around Remus and was walking towards the
greenhouses, “Siri! Make sure that you don’t do anything stupid.”

Sirius turned back and smiled at his brother for a moment and then turned back and walked away.

Remy and Regulus didn’t say anything for a while, back to staring at the sky once again. Until he
finally spoke, though he wasn’t sure why he felt the need to confide in her, “I haven’t spoken to
him since I was in the hospital wing. He hasn’t done anything like that since we started Hogwarts.”

She looked at him but didn't say anything. They stared into each other’s eyes, somehow
understanding each other completely. She was so easy to talk to, almost as easy as it was to talk to
James. He spoke again, desperately wanting to know what she thought, “Do you think he hates
me?”

She shook her head no and spoke softly, “Someone who hates their brother doesn’t fuss over them
the way he just did. He loves you, that much is obvious, possibly to everyone but the both of you.”

“No, he doesn't. He might feel an obligation to me, because of the blood we share, doesn’t love
me. Nobody really loves me.”

She gave him a look that was much somber and serious than it had been, just minutes before,
reaching out and clutching his hand, “Regulus, if you let me then I will be the best friend you ever
had and give you all the love you need.”
He smiled at her, before suddenly bursting out laughing, “That was the cheesiest thing I've ever
heard. “

She began laughing and soon they were cackling uncontrollably.

Although the two had laughed at the cheesiness of the moment, he really believed that she would
be there for him. They turned back to the sky and began looking at the clouds once more. He saw a
cloud that looked like a locket and another next to it that looked like a goblet, he pointed them out
to Remy.
 Pillow talk
Chapter Notes

Okay so just want to mention that there is a weird pov switch here between James and
Regulus. I was originally going to write this whole chapter as Reggie's pov but then
James just spoke to me so don't be surprised by the sudden switch. It takes place pretty
much right after James is introduced in the chapter. Enjoy!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Regulus

It had been days since Regulus had seen James. Days and he still hadn't been able to stop thinking
about how James had essentially come to his rescue with Professor McGonagall. Part of him
wanted to yell at James for interfering in his business and telling professor McGonagall that James
and he had any type of relationship, even if it was just tutoring. He wanted to tell James that he was
an adult and he could handle his own problems. He wasn't fragile for god's sake.

The other part of him, the stronger part, wanted to thank James for his interference because he
hadn't actually wanted to deal with the professor's wrath. He wanted to thank James for sticking his
abnormally large head in his business and finding a way to get him out of trouble. Plus he wanted
to thank James for convincing professor McGonagall to allow him extra time for “tutoring”. Part of
Regulus pretended at the way James had cared enough about Regulus’s happiness that he went out
of his way to improve it. That was the part of him he wanted to slap for being a sappy fool.

He still thought that James deserved a thank you at the very least but every time Regulus had tried
to make contact with James, he seemed a bit preoccupied with his friends. Regulus had been
surprised the day after their night together that James and his friends were not sitting by each other.
In fact, James was the one that wasn't sitting with the marauders but judging by his longing looks
at Sirius and Sirius’s glares at James, that wasn't his choice. Regulus wondered if James’s friends
were mad because James had not come back the night before, he guessed that that probably was it.

The next day things seemed to have gotten back to normal though, with James sitting with his
friends once more. In fact, the four boys seemed even more focused on each other than usual, and
pretty much just talked amongst themselves during mealtime.

Regulus had spent the last couple of days spending time with his own friends. On Saturday, the day
after he hung out with Remy at the greenhouses, he had spent the day playing gobstones and
wizards chess. It was actually nice to be with his friends for a while, as he had been spending more
and more time lying to them and sneaking away to see James.

On Sunday Regulus went and met up with Remy in the library to study. HE found that Remy was
actually a pretty good study partner. She didn't interrupt Regulus every five minutes like Evan and
she was frankly less crabby than Barty. She was so different from his other friends, a good kind of
difference.

James had been pretty much MIA with the Marauders all weekend, which Regulus supposed was
understandable considering the friends were hardly ever separated, and Regulus had been stealing a
bit of James’s time lately. Regulus suspected all kinds of multitudes of Marauder's pranks
throughout the week, but he trusted James to keep his word and not prank Regulus without letting
him know first.

He was a tad worried that James’s absence meant that he didn't want to see Regulus anymore, and
he hated that that affected him. James could have mistaken Regulus's worry the other morning for
genuine anger at James, but Regulus hoped that James was intelligent enough to put that together.
Or maybe he was just sick of hearing Regulus whine, he supposed that was understandable. After
all his mother always sent him away whenever his presence became too annoying, James probably
had the same kind of limit.

By Monday Regulus had almost lost hope that James still wanted to see him, until he caught
James’s eye in the Great Hall. James smirked at him and threw him a wink that had him blushing
into his soup. He never blushed as much as he did around James Potter and it was honestly
humiliating that the boy affected him this much. He really should know better than to get attached,
too bad he didn't though.

“Come on Regs, live a little.”

“Oh excuse me for not having the same definition of living as you, Rosier.”

Barty rolled his eyes at Regulus’s attitude, “Regulus just come down with us. Gillian and Lizzie
said they were bringing firewhiskey, it’s going to be a good time.”

“It’s a Monday night, Barty. Why the hell would I want to get drunk when I have classes tomorrow
morning. And why the hell would I want to hang out with Gillian and Lizzie, I don’t even know
them.” Regulus glared at his friends and used air quotes around the girls’ names because he wasn’t
sure he could even point them out in the common room.
Evan groaned at Regulus’s stubbornness, “It’s not even late and besides you have divination first
thing tomorrow, you could do that class in your sleep. You always seem to know what professor
Tuttle is thinking before he even explains. What else are you going to do tonight if you don’t come
with us.”

“Maybe some of us actually give a shit about our classes, because we don’t have others helping us
with our homework. Besides, I'd much rather read in my bed tonight than watching you two
dimwits try to score with a couple of bimbos.”

Barty let out a bark of laughter, “That is not a bad analogy for Evan trying to score, but really
Regulus you said it yourself, you don’t know these girls let’s not try to guess at their IQ level.”

Evan spoke before Regulus had a chance to reply playfully shoving Barty, “Shut up Crouch. But
Reg’s these girls are pretty hot. I’m not sure why you wouldn’t want to go hang out with them
unless you’re queer.”

Regulus’s gut instantly clenched and he suddenly felt ill.

Barty shoved Evan, “Shut up, Rosier.”

Evan laughed loudly at his two friend’s reaction, “Obviously I am kidding. Of course, Regs isn’t a
queer. I just thought I’d use a little reverse psychology on him.”

Barty rolled his eyes at his friend’s idiocy, “That is not exactly how you use reverse psychology.”

Evan looked at Barty in confusion, “It’s not? Oh whatever, maybe this will work instead. I heard
that Lizzie and Gillian’s roommate Marie have the hots for the Black heir.”

“Marie Conaway?”

Regulus tried his hardest to search for a face to the name that Barty had just spoken. He came up
with nothing, not that it mattered, he wasn’t interested.

Evan mistook his searching expression for interest and spoke again, “Yeah Regs, apparently she's
into emo boys or something.”

Regulus sniffed at the accusation, “I am not emo.”

Both Evan and Barty raised their eyebrows in disbelief and looked down at Regulus’s clothes as if
that proved their point. So what if he usually only wore black and wore rings. That wasn’t emo,
that was class and absolute elegance.

Suddenly Regulus wanted nothing more for his friends to leave so he could contemplate whether he
was more emo than classy, “You guys go have fun. I am going to read and then get a good night’s
sleep.”

Barty rolled his eyes but didn’t look particularly surprised, “You are so lame, Black. One of these
days you really do need to take a risk.”

Even quipped his eyebrows up in smug confidence, “Don’t expect us back too early.”

Barty laughed, “Hell, I might not be back at all. If Gilly follows through on her flirtations from
earlier.”

Regulus cocked his head and confusion, “You can’t get in the girl’s dorm room. Where would you
sleep?”

This made both Evan and Barty burst out laughing as if Regulus had just told a very good joke,
“Oh Regs, did you forget that we are wizards? There are a million and one ways to get past those
stairs.”

“Personally I have only discovered about a thousand different ways, but I am still working on it.”

Barty rolled his eyes at Evans smugness, “Yeah Roser? And how many of those times have you
failed and not ended up getting any?”

“Shut up you little bitch.”

The boys waved goodbye to Regulus and began their trek to the common room, leaving Regulus
with the room to himself. Regulus took advantage immediately and changed into his pajamas, his
favorite ones. He usually didn’t wear them, because they were embarrassingly casual and possibly
muggle. He only wore them when he knew his friend wouldn’t be seeing them.

Sirius had bought them for Regulus as a joke, but Regulus wore them anyway despite their purpose
to anger Regulus. It consisted of a band t-shirt and soft plaid pajama pants. So simple yet he loved
them. The silky pair his parents bought him never compared.

He was preparing for a relaxing evening alone, drawing open his curtain, to find a man in his bed.
An idiotic man. Regulus, embarrassingly, screamed in shock.

“What the fuck, Potter!”

James burst out laughing almost to the point of wheezing, which Regulus thought was a little
dramatic.

Holy shit. James Potter was in Regulus’s bed. He was laying on Regulus’s sheets and his head was
on Regulus’s pillow. Why did this freak him out so bad? They had shared a bed not even a week
ago, but it hadn't been his bed.

James looked up at him with his arms crossed behind his head, looking way too smug, “Did I scare
you, Reg?”

Regulus glared at him, hating that he had been so caught off guard, “What are you doing here?”

“You say that as if you are not glad to see me, which I know is not true.”

“I’d be a lot more glad if you haven't given me a fucking heart attack in the process, you dunce.”

“Oh you're young and strong, you're fine.”

“Please don't presume that you know how I'm feeling, James.”

James laughed at Regulus’s glare. He stood up from the bed and stepped close to Regulus, “I'm
sorry, Reggie. I definitely don't know how you are feeling. I just missed you.”

Regulus crossed his arms and pursed his lips, Oh, you missed me? That's weird because you barely
looked at me for three days.”

James let out a bark of laughter, He then smirked at Reg and cocked his head a bit, looking
ridiculously smug, “ Oh, so you wanted me to look at you?

Regulus rolled his eyes, but couldn't contain his own smirk, “As if I'd ever want that, Potter.”

“Oh, I know you want that. In fact, “He skimmed his hands over Regulus’s shoulders, “I know that
you'd like a lot more than that.”

“Have you ever considered not being so cocky?”

James waited a moment as if he was pondering the idea, “I have actually thought about that.
Except for the way I look at it, if I didn't have something to be cocky about then it would be an
actual problem.”

Regulus twisted his lips in a way that if James didn't know better, he would think Reg was teasing
him, “And what exactly do you have to be cocky about, Potter?”

James snickered at the Slytherin, “Oh, let me see. I'm great at quidditch, a prefect, great friends,
handsome as hell, and I just so happen to have the best looking guy at school.”

“Oh really? Who is this guy?”

James grinned at Regulus’s oblivious game, “Ah well I feel like you might know him. He, like
myself, is extremely handsome, but more delicately. He has perfect pale skin and steely gray eyes.
He is quite tall and very intelligent. There really is only one problem.”
Regulus now had a smirk of his own and was leaning closer to James, “And what's that, Potter?”

James tried to hold back his laughter, “He's completely insufferable and a blonde.”

Regulus glared and punched James in the shoulder, “Oh, a blonde? Is that your type, dumb
blondes?”

James couldn't hold back his laughter anymore, “I just said he was intelligent, didn't I?”

Regulus rolled his eyes but James could see the ghost of a smile on his lips, “Well he couldn't be
that intelligent if he's in a relationship with you, now could he?”

James grinned at Reg’s slip of words, “I never said I was in a relationship with him. I just said I
have him.”

Regulus blushed slightly, “And what does having him entail exactly?”

“Having him means that he's mine. It means that I have heard him moan against me, but I have also
heard him talk about his life. It means that no one else can have him.”

“Now that sounds a bit controlling, doesn't it?”

“Possibly. It’s one of my biggest flaws, I would say.”

“Controlling, egotistical, idiotic, and perpetually childish.”

James crossed his arms over his chest, “What are you listing to?”

“Oh, just all of your flaws,” Reg said matter of factly.

James grinned once more, this time it was much more mischievous, “Oh, is that the game we're
playing? Why don't you list my positives then?”

“I don't think there is any.

“Well, now that's odd because from what I heard last Thursday I have a lot of positives.”

Regulus rolled his eyes and punched James in the shoulder again, “Shut the hell up.”

James laughed again, “So Crouch and Rosier are going to go hang out with some girls and get
trashed on a Monday? What a scandal!”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James exaggerated gasp then his eyes widened as if he had just realized
something, “Wait, how long were you in here?”

“A couple hours.”

Regulus paled slightly, “Hours?”

James felt himself flush a bit and rubbed the back of his neck, “Yeah, I didn't know when you were
gonna get back. You must have been in the common room this whole time.”

“Did you sneak in with your cloak?”

“Yeah, I did. I thought you'd be up here earlier, but you ended up taking longer than I expected.”

“You were laying on my bed. How did you know which one was mine?”

“Well, I noticed the multitudes of books on your bedside table and the distinct lack of female
underwear in your bedside table.”
Regulus quickly looked to both his roommate's beds, “Which one of them had girl's underwear?”

“Both of them, actually. Barty definitely had more though. It might be a game of theirs, to steal the
girl's underwear after sex.”

“Oh, I guess I didn't notice that.”

“Well, if it is a game, then I can appreciate the thought.”

Regulus raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms, “So you would steal girl's underwear?”

“No, of course not. That's degrading as hell but If somebody did leave something behind after
spending a night with me then I might keep it as a trophy.”

Regulus’s eyes widened, “Do you have my tie?”

James knew he probably looked ridiculously smug as he nodded but he couldn't help himself.

Regulus glared, “Give it back.”

James shook his head, “No, you snooze you lose. Besides, I know you have at least seven more ties
in that drawer.”

Regulus’s eyes widened, “Did you go through all of my drawers?”

James shrugged, “Well, yeah I was bored. I didn't look at everything.”

“You're such a fucking idiot, James.”

“Oh, I'm an idiot?”

Regulus crossed his arms, glaring once more, “Yes, and you are deplorable.”

“Oh, I am deplorable? What about your friends, who were just talking about sneaking into the
girls' dorms. I, on the other hand, follow the rules like a model citizen.”

Regulus let out a sharp laugh, “Oh yeah because you didn't literally sneak into your booty calls
room and lay on his bed for hours.”

“Well, the rules would never apply to you Reg. Besides, I would never call you a booty call.”

“Oh, you wouldn't. What would you call me then?”

James smirked at him and tilted his head, “Beautiful.”

Reggie's ears turned red. He looked unbelieving that James had just called him that. Which frankly
James didn't understand, because didn't Reg own a mirror?

“Umm…I-”

James stepped forward and cradled Regulus’s face in his hands, “You know who doesn't always
have to have a comeback. Sometimes you can just let things slide.”

“You talk way more than me, Potter.”

James chuckled slightly, “That's true, but right now don't feel like you have to say anything.”

Regulus stuttered out a reply, “I…Thank you, James. You are beautiful too. A total idiot but
beautiful.”

James smiled softly and leaned in, and kissed Regulus. He kissed him slowly and passionately. He
kissed him differently than he'd ever kissed him before. They usually snogged after arguing so it
was generally rushed and aggressive. Not that James minded that but this new type of kiss was
quite nice as well. James could feel the tingling between their lips and his coils taste the minty
breath of Regulus. He was engulfed in the elegant scent of Regulus Black, probably the result of a
shampoo that James couldn't even pronounce. James pushed all the passion he had for Regulus,
admittedly a lot, into the kiss.

When the two finally parted lips, James leaned his forehead against Regulus’s, breathing heavy.
The two connected eyes and for a moment it was just the two of them. They didn't have to worry
about Regulus’s friends coming back or the Marauders finding out about them. It was just them
and it was beautiful. Until James and his invasive thoughts spoke, “Do you think we should have
sex?”

Regulus pulled back farther, looking shocked, “What?”

James’s face flushed, he could not believe that he had just blurted that out, “Sorry, that came out of
nowhere. I swear I actually have put thought into this, a lot of thought in fact. I would never want
to rush you, but I wanted to know if this was something you'd ever want to do. If so, I would like to
make sure I am prepared and everything. I would never want to hurt you, Reggie.”

Regulus still looked incredibly taken off guard so James backtracked, “Look I am sorry I brought it
up. Can we just forget we had this conversation?”

James, feeling ridiculously nervous, started to pace, when Reg put his arm on James’s to stop him.
James looked at him and Regulus looked slightly more in control of his thoughts as he said, “Did
you just ask if I wanted to have sex with you?”

James stuttered out, “Uhm…Y-yeah I am sorry about that, it was out of line. It's just I've been
thinking about you the last few days and then that kiss was, wow, And I just couldn't help but blurt
it out.”

Regulus nodded as if he had reaffirmed that he heard James correctly, “While I will agree that you
didn't pick the best moment, and I wouldn't expect anything less from you, Potter, I have thought
about it a bit as well. I mean I am open to the idea, but what do you mean you might hurt me?”

James was slightly relieved and still embarrassed, “Well I have ya know…been with women before
and it's not exactly the same as being with another boy. I'd imagine it's a lot more complicated than
being with a woman and I just don't want to hurt you.”
“Wait, who said you were going to top me?”

James wondered if he had insulted Regulus by assuming that he would take that role. He wasn't
sure why he had assumed that the boy would, it just had felt right when he thought of it. If Regulus
would prefer James take that role instead, he was fine with that as well, “Oh I am sorry Reg. I
didn't mean to offend you. I just sort of imagined it that way, but you can stop if you'd like.”

Reg paused a minute before replying, “No. I am okay with the way you imagined it. I just…. Yeah,
I don't want it to hurt badly. So if we are going to do this, you need to do some research.”

James nodded and then rubbed his forehead trying his best to think of how he could research this
kind of topic, “Yeah that's what I was thinking. I am just not sure how I am going to do that.”

Regulus shrugged and then sent James a mischievous smile, “Yeah it's a good thing it's your
responsibility not mine, Potter. Are you regretting that you didn't make me do the work now?”

James laughed at his teasing tone, “No I can't say I am. Besides, anything worthwhile takes work
and I would definitely call your ass worthwhile.”

Regulus flushed and quickly changed the subject, “So yeah just let me know when you figure that
out, and…we can set something up.”

“I’m sorry If this made things a bit awkward.”

“No, well maybe it did but I think it was good you did it.”

James quirked his head slightly, “You do?”

“Uh yeah I mean I would be lying if I said I hadn't been thinking about it lately and well it's better
to be prepared.”

James smiled, Regulus was so mature for his age, “I do have good ideas occasionally, you know?”
Regulus smiled at him, “Very Rarely.”

******************************************************************************************

James

A while later the two boys were sprawled out on Regulus’s bed, with the curtains spelled shut and
a silencing spell in place. James was laid out on Regulus' pillow while Regulus was using James’s
arm as his own pillow. Reg had claimed that this was the only way the two of them could fit in the
bed together, which James knew was a lie considering all of the marauders could fit on this bed if
they wanted to. James didn't mind Regulus’s insistence that he was right as he enjoyed feeling the
Slytherin pressed up against him.

Regulus wasn't currently speaking to James and hasn't since their awkward conversation had ended
earlier. James still felt bad for ruining the nice moment they had been having, but he knew that it
was important, to be honest in a relationship, even though he wasn't sure he was allowed to say
they were in a relationship in the first place. James secretly had been in his head for the last few
days anyway.

James’s parents had been married for a very long time and still had an incredibly strong
relationship, they always said their secret was honesty. They were always honest with each other so
that they could communicate through their problems. James thought that even though he and
Regulus obviously weren't like his parents, it wasn't a bad line of thought to follow anyways.

James despised silence. It reminded him of his lonely childhood. No, that his parents hadn't tried,
but they worked and James was an only child so he spent a lot of time in silence. When he came to
Hogwarts that all changed and when Sirius came to live with him he knew that he'd never really
had to be lonely again. So even though he wasn't alone and Regulus was clearly pressed against
him, he hated the silence. The problem was, James was pretty sure Regulus liked the silence and he
didn't want to upset him by breaking it.

James turned to look at Regulus and their eyes met. James was embarrassed to say his heart
skipped at the sight of steely gray eyes and long fluttering eyelashes. Regulus looked at James with
an intensity that James had not expected. James ached to know what Regulus was thinking at this
very moment.

He didn't have to wait very long when Regulus lunged forward and kissed him. James was caught
off guard but quickly recovered and kissed back. Regulus slowly crawled on top of James, without
breaking the connection of their lips. Regulus straddled the Gryffindor and James let his hands rest
on Regulus’s hips. Regulus held himself up with his arms on either side of James.
After a few minutes, Regulus pulled back and their eyes connected once more. Hazel and brown
eyes inches apart and the mix of breath. Regulus spoke first, his voice raspy, “I never got to thank
you.”

What the hell was Regulus talking about? Actually, why was Regulus talking when they could be
kissing? All that time they could've been talking, there was absolute silence, but now he wants to
talk in the middle of this?

His thoughts were interrupted by Regulus shifting down the bed. As he slowly moved down be
lifted James’s shirt revealing his stomach and kissed it scatteredly. Holy shit was Regulus about to
—

James’s internal question was answered when Regulus kissed lower and he finally remembered his
voice, croaking out, “Thank me for what?”

Regulus looked up at James and smirked before starting to unclasp James’s belt.

Holy fuck that smirk. Jesus Reg was so hot when he was cocky.

After Regulus had gotten the belt off and began unzipping the trousers he spoke, “Thank you for
getting me off the hook with Professor McGonagall.”

James had not expected that response and felt his eyes widen. That was what Regulus was thanking
him for? If this is what he got for helping Regulus out of a jam then Regulus would never have
another problem in his life that James did not take care of for him.

By the time James had gotten his thoughts together Regulus had already pulled down both his
trousers and his underwear, leaving him bare before Regulus. He felt he needed to speak before
Regulus started so he rushed out, “You don't have to thank me for that. I did that for you.”

He smirked up at James, “And I'll do this for you.” And then he plunged.

James would be forever amazed how Regulus could be so good at one activity in particular without
having all that much experience and he was only getting better. Jesus, he had the ability to make
James lose his fucking mind. Hell, he was starting to have that talent even when he wasn't giving
James fantastic head, Regulus Black was an enigma.
“Oh. Fuck. Reggie. Damn.”

Regulus pulled off and pumped James with his fist as he spoke, “Oui, laisse moi t'entendre,
Jamie.”

Oh, fuck did he just speak French to me. Merlin had never sounded so sexy. James had never heard
Regulus speak French before but now that he had James might never let him stop.

Soon James found himself cumming and Regulus joined him at the top of the bed again. Regulus
leaned his head on James’s shoulder, panting heavily. James took a moment to come down from
his bliss, “Do you know how sexy you sound when you speak French?”

Regulus laughed loudly and James had never heard such a melodic sound. Even Regulus’s laugh
was perfect, “Uh thanks I guess. I mean it's just a language.”

James rolled his eyes at the dismissal, because how did Reg not understand how good he sounded
speaking French. James began shifting himself down the bed, dislodging himself from Regulus.
Then Regulus tried to stop him. Regulus always felt the need to stop James when he wanted to
reciprocate. James secretly wondered if it's because Regulus always felt like he was something to
use rather than to love.

“James, that was a thank you.”

James scoffed, “Yeah, I know and this is a thank you for that amazing thank you.”

James watched as Regulus’s cheeks became flushed and smirked to himself. He couldn't wait to
have Regulus writhing in pleasure above him.

******************************************************************************************

Regulus was playing with James' hair. James was trying his hardest not to move too much because
if he did then Regulus might stop and James really didn't want that. The boys had switched
positions and now James was laying with his head on Reg’s stomach and the Slytherin was
combing his hand through James’s hair.
“That was really sweet of you by the way.”

James breathed out a sigh of relief that Regulus had spoken first, and he was still playing with
James' hair so James felt safe enough to respond, “What was?”

“Going to talk to Professor McGonagall for me. When did you even do that?”

“Oh yeah. Right after I left the Room of Requirement, I went to her office and talked to her.”

Regulus paused his petting for a moment before continuing a few seconds later, “Really? It was
like six in the morning, she didn't think that was weird?”

She let out a breathy laugh, “Well yeah she did, but if I do say so myself I handled the situation like
a pro. Calm and collected and all that, she wasn't suspicious for a second.”

Regulus let out a snort of derision, almost like he didn't believe James or something, “Right, I'm
sure you were. How did you decide tutoring was the best excuse?”

“Well I mean it just came to me. I mean Minnie knows you are a good student and are an obsessive
studier. I knew I needed to get you out of trouble so I thought that was the easiest for me to explain
why we would be together.”

“Well done. While I do think you picked about the stupidest excuse when you obviously could've
just said you found me dozing in the library during your prefect rounds. Still, it was a good lie on
the spot.”

James thought about it. Huh, that actually would have worked and then he might not have
detention coming up. Whatever the tutoring excuse worked too,” Whatever mine worked too, plus
now you have a couple hours a week to tutor me, so maybe it was better.”

Again, Regulus snorted, “Yeah, I have more time to tutor someone who doesn't need tutoring. I
wonder what I'll spend all that time doing?’

James looked up at him, with his head tilted back, “Who said I didn't need to drink?”
“Why would you need tutoring? You are in the top portion of your class.”

“Yeah I am, but I do have NEWT’s coming up. I wouldn't mind having a certified genius helping
me.”

Regulus laughed, “Okay James, I'll help you since McGonagall already thinks I am going to be
anyways. But you have to do something for me in return.”

“Anything.”

“Now that is a dangerous proposition, Potter. I haven't quite decided what I want, but when I do I'll
let you know.”

“Okay, you've got a deal, Black.”

“Lovely. So, what was going on with my brother and you on Friday?”

James felt his eyes widen and he looked back at Regulus, “What do you mean?”

Regulus, who was still running his hands through James’s hair, scoffed, “I mean that you didn't sit
by your little gang at meals. Why was that?”

James sighed because Merlin Regulus was about to yell at him. He took one more second to enjoy
the fingers running through his hair before he spoke, “They were mad at me because I came back
at six in the morning when I was supposed to be back last night. Then they accused me of seeing
someone and I told them they were crazy and I was going for a walk.”

Regulus rolled his eyes before replying in a frustrated tone, “James you are such an idiot. You told
them that you were out for a fucking walk? All night? No wonder they were pissed. Even if my
brother is dense, he's intelligent enough to pick up on that bullshit.”

“Yeah…I...I know it was stupid of me and they were cross at me all day, but they forgave me later
that night.”
Regulus’s hands stopped and James didn't have the heart to look in Regulus’s face as he spoke his
next words, “Since I told them that I was seeing someone and the reason I didn't tell them who it
was was that it was a guy and he wanted his secrecy.”

James instantly felt a pull on his hair, pulling his face back so he had to look Regulus in the eyes.
Regulus' eyes were emotionless and that freaked James out. When Regulus spoke his tone was also
rather deadpan, “What did you just say?”

James backpedaled trying to keep Regulus from killing him, “I'm sorry, okay? I know you didn't
want me to tell anybody, even though they will never guess that it's you. I just had to tell them
something. They were so mad and I was so miserable all day.”

Something in Regulus’s eyes softened at James' last sentence and the hand that had been gripping
his hair was now smoothing it down. Regulus moved his hands and clasped them over James’s
shoulders so that his hands were resting on his chest, “It’s okay. I didn't want you to tell anyone,
but you're right they will never guess it's me. Just please be more careful from now on.”

James felt instant relief. He didn't know why Regulus was so calm all of a sudden, but he was
grateful. He absolutely despised it when Reggie was mad at him.

James spoke again, hesitant to bring this up, “They know I'm with the mystery guy now.”

Regulus sucked in a breath and then James could hear him breathe out slowly, “Okay.”

James didn't know why Regulus was being so understanding, but he loved it. It was making him a
lot braver than he probably should be. And that is why he decided to bring up Sirius, “Sirius was
pretty interested in my relationship.”

“What?”

“I mean not like he was trying to figure out who it was. I told him that wasn't something I wanted
to share and he was completely understanding. He was just asking me a lot of questions about how
I got in a relationship with my mystery guy and what my relationship was like.”
“Why was he asking all these questions, James?”

James shrugged, “I don't know, Reg. I'm thinking he just was interested.”

“He wasn't mad that you were in a relationship with a guy?”

James was a little shocked but this line of questioning, “Of course not. He wouldn't care about
something like that.”

“Oh.”

James reached and set a hand on Regulus’s, “He wouldn't mind if you were in a relationship with a
guy either, Reg.”

Regulus did not respond except for a hum, which confused James more than anything. A minute of
silence had him even more concerned until Regulus spoke suddenly, “I saw him the other day.”

James looked back at him, looking slightly taken aback, “When was that?”

Regulus shrugged, seeming to be a little embarrassed, “Uhm… Well you see, I was out at the
greenhouses and he came down.”

James laughed a bit in disbelief, “You were at the greenhouses?”

Regulus rolled his eyes and shot James a little glare, “And why exactly are you so surprised?”

“It's not that. Well maybe it is, it's just that sometimes you can be a little uptight.”

“I am not uptight James. I just like things how they should be.”

James laughed and apologized, but somehow Regulus didn't seem to find it sincere, “My bad, of
course, you're not, Reggie.”

Regulus glared at James once more but continued his story anyways, “Anyways I was with my
friend and Sirius and Remus came down.”

James didn't look surprised that the two were there, but he did raise his eyebrows in curiosity, “Oh
really? Did you talk to him at all?”

Regulus scratched the back of his head looking a bit flustered, which gave James the indication that
he had in fact talked to his brother, not only that but he had spoken to him while high, “Uh, yeah. I
talked to him, but it wasn't a particularly in-depth conversation.”

James was full-on grinning at Regulus now, the idea of the uptight Regulus Black speaking to his
older brother while high was hilarious, “I bet high talking to his older brother was hilarious.”

Regulus slapped James’s chest lightly as if trying to get the boy to shut up and continued speaking,
“He actually seemed sort of worried for me and Remy told me she thinks he still loves me.”

James' grin turned into a soft smile. Oh, it was this kind of conversation then, “Of course, he was
worried for you, Reg. The idea of you being high and vulnerable, I'm sure it was a nightmare for
him.” James paused, “Wait did you say, Remy?”

“Yeah, Remy Crest. We’re kind of friends now or maybe we have been for a while. I am not really
sure.”

James couldn't help but smile at the idea of Regulus being friends with someone who wasn't a
sociopathic manipulator, “Remy Crest? She is a really nice girl. You do know that she's a half-
blood, right?”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Yes, I know that James. I'm not a complete arse, you know?”

“Yes, I know that. I just wanted to make sure you knew that, but Remy is right. Sirius does love
you.”
Regulus sighed deeply before shaking his head, “I don't know if I believe that. I mean so much has
happened between us that I genuinely don't think it's possible. It's to the point where I don't think
that could ever be a possibility again.”

James leaned his head back and looked at Regulus, Regulus looked back down at him, “Regulus,
he does and will always love you. You are his baby brother. Do you really think that connection
disappears just because your parents no longer claim him?”

“That's how it's supposed to work. Besides, I might be his flesh and blood, but he's never loved me
the way he loves you.”

James wrinkled his nose at that comment. Nobody could degrade and hurt Regulus the way he
could himself. He never knew his worth and he always thought of himself as less, “Unfortunately,
that could never be true. As much as I always wanted him to be my brother, I will never be his real
one. I might be his best friend, hell maybe even his other half but you will

always be his brother over me.”

Regulus moved his hand down and cupped the side of James’s face. James wondered if it was an
attempt to comfort him. He appreciated it nonetheless, “James, you are the brother he chose. I
think that says more than being the brother he was stuck with.”

James shook his head, but not enough to dislodge Regulus’s hand on his face, “I was always
jealous of you, you know?”

Regulus furrowed eyebrows, surprised, “For what? Why?”

“For being his brother, of course. Before I even met you I was jealous of the hell that you got to
grow up with my best friend. Not to mention the way he used to talk about you in your first year,
Merlin, anybody would have thought you were god's gift to the world. He talked about you
nonstop and then I met you and you were just a small scrawny kid.”

“Hey I was not scrawny, I was slender. And I seriously doubt that he talked about me much, he
didn't even write to me his first year.”

James found himself utterly shocked. He distinctly remembered Sirius dragging him to the owlery
multiple times a week to send letters to “Reggie”. James insisted, “Yes he did. He wrote all the
time, at least a couple times every week. You're the one that never responded. He assumed you
were angry at him for ending up in Gryffindor.”

Regulus looked confused now. As if the information James just gave him was completely new.
And James put it together slightly quicker than Regulus did, “That fucking bitch.”

Regulus didn't say anything, still looking astonished.

James began a bit of a rant, “I can not believe this. I absolutely can not believe that monster would
do that. Especially to a ten and eleven-year-old. Why did she want you to hate each other so badly,
even at that age? That is the reason you two have such a rocky relationship now. That manipulative
bitch.”

Regulus finally snapped out of it, “James! That's my mother you are talking about.”

“Yes, I am aware of that Reg. What kind of mother puts her children against each other like that?”

Regulus looked lost, not knowing what to say. He had long since abandoned stroking James’s hair
and cradling his face, now he just let his hands dangle loosely on James’s chest.

“Your mother is a terrible human being. She has always treated both you and Sirius like shit and
you defend her, why?”

Regulus looked down at James, his eyes showing vulnerability, “It's not as simple as that, James.
She may not have been the best mother in the world, but what other mother do I have? I mean she's
the only one I get. That's how life works.”

“That's not set in stone, Regulus. You can have more if you want.”

“No, I can't. We can't all trade up and get a better mother when we choose James. That's not what
people do when they get a shitty family, well I guess some people do.`”

James glared at Regulus’s sudden attack at Sirius when Walpurga is clearly the problem, “That's
not what he did.”
Regulus gave James a cruel look that said, “Are you sure about that? He had a mom and dad he
didn't like and what do you know he found a pair he liked and became their son. He had a
worthless brother and traded him in for a better model too. Wow, it must be nice to be Sirius Black
and get everything you want all the time.”

James couldn't believe Regulus was being like this. He leaned up off of Regulus and turned around
so he was sitting cross-legged across from Regulus. He spoke slowly, attempting to sound more
calm than angry, “That is not fair Regulus. He had to get out of that house and he did not get
everything he wanted. Otherwise, you would be with him too.”

Regulus let out a pitiful laugh, “Yeah right because I totally forgot that he asked me to come with
him when he left. Right yeah, my mistake. He left, James. He fucking snuck out in the middle of
the night and abandoned me. He left me with them, with the people he was too scared to stay in
that house with. He left me to deal with the consequences of his actions.” He was crying. James
couldn't believe it but it was clear from the glistening eyes, “He made me what I am. This person
that people hate. He is the one that forced me to bend and bend until finally, I broke under the
pressure they put on me. He is the reason I have to be this perfect heir, because do you know what
would happen if I did what he did and bailed?”

James shook his head not quite knowing what to say as he watched the most put-together person he
knows fall apart.

“Well for your information Mr. Potter, they would have ruined his life. They would've come to
your perfect house with your perfect family and taken your new brother back. The only reason they
let him leave in the first place is that they had me. If they hadn't had their spare heir then they
would have had no choice but to force the one they had to do what he was told. It was the whole
reason they had me though, so don't feel too bad. My entire purpose in life was to be Sirius'
backup. If I had somehow failed to uphold my responsibilities as a hero then they would have taken
back the original, kicking and screaming if it came to it. You would have lost your best friend and
he would've been in hell. I dint fail though and you'd think Id deserve a fucking thank you for
saving Sirous from a life of misery but no instead I get called vile and puppetlike.”

James was shocked. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He placed a hand on Regulus’s leg
and Regulus spoke again, voice breaking, “I am so sick of people looking at me like I am the
villain and as if Sirius is a hero. As if I have a choice in any of what happens to me and that I am
somehow making a bad choice.”

James felt incredibly naive and foolish. He had never even considered the idea that Regulus was
the only thing standing in the way between Walpurga taking Sirius back. He had never considered
that Regulus might be the one saving Sirius from a lifetime of unhappiness. Every word that
 Regulus spoke drove a knife through James’s heart and he ached for the boy. The boy who had
been treated like an understudy his entire life. The boy had been abandoned by his brother and left
to manage everything. The boy was sick of being called a villain.

James knew he took too long to answer because Regulus was sobbing. He just was so worried
about saying the wrong thing. He leaned forward and placed his hands on either side of Regulus’s
face, “You are not the villain, Reg. I could never think of you that way and I want you to know
that. I think I am starting to see things from your perspective and I am so sorry for judging you.
You are an amazing brother for what you are doing. I am so sorry if I have ever made you feel
worse than you already do about your family. I know that you don't feel like there is a way out and
maybe there isn't, but I promise you that if you want it, I will find you a way out.”

Regulus pulled back out of James’s hold, “That's impossible.”

James put his hand back on Regulus’s face and turned it towards him, “Nothing is impossible
Regulus. I promise you that all you have to tell me you want out and I will make it happen for
you.”

Regulus sighed In relief, letting out a deep breath, as if some of the pressure had just been lifted off
them, “Okay.”

James smiled slightly and then leaned in and kissed Regulus briefly.

After that, the boys unwinded a bit and made it back to their original positions, with James resting
on Regulus’s pillow while Regulus used James’s arm as a pillow. They had made a silent
discussion to avoid heavy topics for the rest of the night. James still couldn't believe that Regulus
and he had had a serious discussion without it turning into an argument. He took that as a positive
sign and a step in the right direction with Reg.

They discussed each other the rest of the night. They talked about Remy, the marauders, pranks,
and the greenhouses.

James dozed off with Regulus in his arms, feeling distinctly content.

Chapter End Notes

French Translations (Or at least what I am trying to say)

Oui, laisse moi t'entendre, Jamie= Yes, let me hear you, Jamie
 Let's talk about sex
Chapter Notes

Just a fair warning Reggie is not in this chapter at all, though he is mentioned. This
chapter is narrated by Remus, so we will finally be getting some Wolfstar. I had to put
quite a bit in this chapter, as I wanted to show a certain point in Remus and Sirius's
relationship, but since this book is a Jegulus book there isn't much time for them. We
will be back to some Jegulus action next chapter. Enjoy!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Remus

Remus was in deep shit and he knew it. He has been in deep shit for a long time, probably since the
first minute, he looked at his best friend and thought damn what I wouldn’t give to kiss him. That
was around the fourth year, but it hasn't wavered since. Sure Remus had dated a few men and for a
while, he had even thought that he could move on from his best friend, but those moments never
lasted long. He always fell back into the familiar longing he felt when he looked into those stormy
grey eyes.

His friend had always been more touchy than was strictly necessary but lately, he had definitely
become worse. It seemed as if lately all he did was touch Remus in some way or another. It
definitely did not help control Remus’s feelings for his friend, in fact, it had quite the opposite
effect.

The marauders had just successfully pulled a pretty decent prank in Remus was honest and the four
boys were now confidently fleeing their scene. Usually, they would sneak and skulk but this time
they knew it couldn't be traced back to them, so they more strutted than anything. Well, James and
Sirius strutted while Pete and he mostly laughed and rolled their eyes at their friends' antics. That
was until Sirius threw an arm around Remus’s shoulder, it was a little awkward with their height
difference, Remus had instantly fallen silent. He felt his heart beating faster and he knew his face
must be beat red. Of course, Sirius had no idea the kind of internal turmoil his friend was going
through, just because of a little friendly touching. Remus knew though, he couldn't find it in himself
to be mad at his friend even though being this close to Sirius was almost painful. He couldn't be
mad because he secretly adored the attention.

Lately the feelings he got when he saw Sirius had gotten stronger and the ache for his friend had
become more insistent. He wasn't sure if this was a result of him knowing his friend better or if
puberty had more to do with this. He chose to believe it was the former as the latter was too
humiliating to comprehend.
It helped that Sirius didn't seem to currently have a girlfriend or even an obvious fling. Which in
itself was certainly odd for his friend, who had seemed incapable of not having someone to snog
from week to week by the time he reached the fourth year. While Remus was glad he didn't have to
force a smile or a laugh when Sirius brought up the girls he fancied in front of him at the moment,
he also felt sort of put out. He felt put out because Sirius had now taken to spending all his time
with the marauders, whether it was with the group as a whole or individually.

This meant that Remus truly had no escape from his longing for Sirius, as the boy was ALWAYS
around. He was always around with his perfect face and beautiful hair, it honestly wasn't fair that
Remus now had to pretend all the time. He almost preferred the time that Sirius was snogging his
current girl in a broom closet, or at least he could recognize it was a lot less exhausting.

Still, the ever-present Sirius did have some moments lately that made Remus smile just thinking
about it.

Remus was feeling flustered looking down at the package in his hands, with Sirius watching his
reaction with rapt attention from the other side of the sofa. “So do you like it? Andy mentioned it
to me in one of her letters and I knew I had to get her to send it to me for you.” Remus blushed at
the idea that Sirius had been thinking about him while reading a letter from his favorite cousin. He
flushed even darker when he realized just how well Sirius knew him. He looked down at the
birthday gift again, it was a record for his old record player his mother had given him when he
began Hogwarts. Not just any album it was the new Led Zeppelin record, that was supposedly
insanely good. Remus knew he had mentioned a few times that he had wanted it more than
anything and Sirius had gotten it for him. He looked up and thanked Sirius with a smile and Sirius
just responded with a radiant grin. It melted Remus’s nerves and the two had spent the rest of the
night listening to the record together.

That had been on Remus’s birthday and he could remember not being able to drop his dopey smile
for days after he received the gift.

However there were also faults with Sirius being around all the time, for example, he was
constantly being put into uncomfortable positions due to how touchy his friend was. In fact, he
remembered a specific circumstance that had humiliated him beyond belief and served to confuse
Sirius.

Remus was sitting on Sirius’s bed, enveloped in Sirius’s spicy-sweet smell. Sirius was grinning at
Remus and Remus found himself in a daze at the beautiful boy in front of him. Sirius really did have
the most amazing smile and Remus was constantly finding himself stupid with a desire for his best
friend. Sirius said something, not that Remus could focus on the words when his friend was smiling
like that, and then the raven-haired boy leaned towards Remus. Remus felt his heart rate rise as
Sirius put his hand on Remus’s knee and squeezed. He removed his hand almost immediately but
the damage had already been done. Remus quickly had made an excuse and ran to the bathroom
as fast as possible. He leaned against the door feeling overwhelmed and out of his league.

Sirius had later pestered him with questions of his sudden disappearance, with which Remus made
an excuse about the full moon approaching. Remus felt bad about using that lie as an excuse since
Sirius instantly understood and began offering him assistance with anything.

Remus knew that his feelings would never be reciprocated and he had to learn to control his own
feelings and thoughts. It was so hard sometimes but so was being a werewolf and he had to deal
with that too, so what was another challenge. He knew that he was in for a rough time until he
could learn how to get his thoughts under control. Until then he would just have to suffer in silence
watching the boy he loved from afar.

*************************************************************************************

James Potter was absolutely smashed. To be fair Remus was pretty drunk himself, but he certainly
wasn't on James’s level. His friend was currently singing a Bowie song at the top of his lungs using
a bottle of fire whiskey as his microphone. Sirius was singing as well but even he couldn't match
James’s intensity for this song. Peter was off somewhere snogging his girlfriend and Remus was
sitting on an armchair with his own drink clutched in his hand.

As the song drew to a close Sirius slung an arm over James’s shoulder and pulled him over to
Remus, effectively stopping James from starting to sing again. As much as Remus loved a drunk
James Potter, he had to be honest, the boy could not sing to save his life. So Sirius had essentially
just saved the rest of the party's eardrums.

“Wow, I never knew you had it in ya, Jamie boy. I must admit I’ve never been more proud of you.”

James laughed, way louder than was necessary. His eyes were glassy and unfocused but Remus
could still see the mischievousness in his eyes as he looked at Sirius, “Hey, Padfoot. You speak
French, right?”

Sirius furrowed his brow, his drunken mind couldn't comprehend the change of subject. To be fair
Remus’s drunk mind couldn't track the subject jump either. Sirius still replied to his friend, “Uh,
yeah Jamie I do. Unfortunately, the old witch made me learn it.”

James nodded enthusiastically, Remus wanted to laugh at his obliterated friend, but he was too
interested in where this was going, “Say something in French.”
Sirius looked at his friend, bewildered, but spoke slowly with words that Remus couldn't
comprehend. He realized that it must be French, and he couldn't believe that Sirius could manage
to be bilingual while intoxicated.

“Vous êtes soit très ivre, soit très bizarre. Quoi qu’il en soit, je suis là pour ça, mon frère.”

Remus felt his mouth drop at how incredible those foreign words sounded coming from Sirius’s
lips. James on the other hand just stared at Sirius for a second before shaking his head, as if he was
making a decision.

Sirius grinned at James before leaning in and kissing James on the cheek, “I love you, Jamie.
Seriously, never change.”

Then he walked away, presumably to go get another drink. Remus could practically feel himself
turning green in envy. He wished Sirius would kiss him like that.

James, on the other hand, didn't let it shake him. He walked towards Remus and suddenly plopped
on his lap. Remus had not been expecting that and almost spilled his drink in surprise. He managed
to save it, but he still had a drunk boy, nearly his size on his lap. James could be a bit affectionate
when he was drunk, but he had never done this before so Remus figured Prongs must've missed his
boyfriend.

“Oi! Prongs!”

James giggled, the man actually giggled. Remus couldn't help but grin at the sound, “You are so
drunk. So why did you want Sirius to speak French?”

James turned to Remus and smirked at him, “Oh, that. I just wanted to see if it felt the same when
he spoke French.”

“Felt the same as what? Who else do you know that speaks French?”

“Uhm…My..my-”
“Your Bunny?”

Remus thought the nickname Sirius had come up with was a bit ridiculous but he wasn't sure what
else to call James’s mystery boy.

James laughed loudly as if he was in on some inside joke, “Sure, yeah my Bunny. He would hate
that nickname, by the way. I sort of love it though.”

Remus smiled at how happy his friend seemed, when he talked about the mystery boy, “I don't
doubt it, but it's easier than saying his name, right?”

James nodded before taking a large swig of his drink, “Anyways, I wanted to see if Sirius’ French
made me feel the same as his.”

“So, Bunny speaks French?”

James nodded, smiling proudly as if it was his own achievement, “He sure does.”

“So, did it make you feel the same?”

“No, my Bunny sounds much much sexier.”

Remus very much doubted that was possible after hearing how good Sirius had sounded, “Really?
Are you sure?”

James nodded and then sighed deeply, “You won't believe it Moony. He sounds so…. Well, let's
just say it makes me feel….Okay so we were messing around the other day and he spoke it to me in
the middle and I swear to Merlin I about died it was so hot.”

Remus was a bit surprised when he heard that, he wasn't sure why but he never considered that
James and his…Bunny were intimate. Or maybe he had but had completely blocked it out or
something, but hearing it first hand had been a bit disturbing. Once again he found himself
wondering who James’s boyfriend was.

Then he couldn't stop thinking about French and a certain Black. James had said that his boyfriend
had spoken it when they were intimate and he couldn't help but imagine Sirius and himself in that
same position, hearing Sirius talk dirty to him in French. There was no way James’s Bunny
sounded as good as Sirius did speaking French, but then again James was probably a bit biased.

Remus looked at James curiously before asking, “So is your guy here tonight?”

James laughed as if the idea was ridiculous and took another swig of his drink, “No, he definitely
is not.”

Remus took a swig of his own drink, considering James’s words. He had been very definite in his
answer meaning there was probably no possibility of the boy being at a Gryffindor party. He knew
he shouldn't be so curious, he should respect James’s relationship, but Remus always loved
mysteries.

James spoke before Remus had a chance to ask another question, “So what about you Moony?
There any guys here for you?”

Remus looked around the room, chuckling as a response before his eyes landed on Sirius. Who was
currently dancing on a table on the other side of the room looking both like a complete idiot and
breathtakingly beautiful, “No, I don't think so Prongs.”

James pouted a bit as a response, “That's too bad Moony. You deserve to have a nice guy. Hey, do
you wanna take shots?”

Remus grinned at the sudden change of subject and decided that yes he would love a shot and
nodded.

This caused James to hop off his lap and yell to Peter, “Petey! Petey boy!”

Peter, who had his face in his girlfriend's neck, suddenly looked up and yelled back, “Yeah
Prongs?”
“Let's take a shot!”

Peter said something to Magdalene and promptly left to join James. Remus looked at her,
expecting her to be angry at Peter for leaving her, instead, he found her laughing before joining
some of her friends. At that moment Remus was wondering if Magdalene was that perfect woman
for Peter and he really thought she might be.

Suddenly James was yelling to the fourth Marauder, “Pads!”

Sirius immediately joined them and the four boys lined up shots of fire whiskey and rum. They
continued to take shots until the night became very blurry for both of them.

*****************************************************************************************

Remus could almost feel the room spinning. It wasn't actually spinning, but it was close. He
figured it might actually start spinning if he stood up and that was the precise reason why he wasn't
planning on moving from this spot anytime soon.

He was having a great night drinking and partying with his friends. He had even managed to
convince the normally killjoy Lily Evans to take a shot with him. The party had pretty much
cleared out about half an hour ago, but that didn't stop Sirius or himself from enjoying the rest of
their night.

There were people scattered throughout the floor of the common room sleeping, including one guy
who was sleeping against a wall and would be waking up with a very sore neck in the morning.
Peter had abandoned the party almost an hour ago with Magdalene and Remus figured it was best
he didn't go up to the room until those two had fallen asleep. Even though Peter was fairly good
about using silencing spells, Remus thought that it was better to be safe than sorry because he
really did not want to hear anything that might be going on up there. The lovely James Fleamont
Potter was recently passed out in front of the fireplace with his arse in the air and was drooling on
the rug where his face met the floor.

Remus and Sirius were the last ones awake in the common room but they had abandoned their
drinks once the party ended. Now they were just chatting on the couch about whatever came to
their drunken minds. Sirius was sitting a little closer than was probably necessary but Remus didn't
mind. He knew that he probably should mind, especially since he wasn't sure what his drunken
mind would do or say.

He tried not to worry about that though, considering Sirius had been by him all night and he hadn't
said anything stupid yet. In fact, Sirius had been practically glued to Remus’s hip all night, besides
the short conversation Remus had with James. That in itself was peculiar for Sirius as he normally
preferred to be a social butterfly at parties. Then again, he hadn't really stopped socializing with
people tonight, he had just dragged Remus along as he did.

Remus didn't like this change of order for a few reasons; The first one being that he didn't actually
want to talk to all those people, the second one being that Sirius had his arm thrown around Remus
most of the night which was awkward because of their height difference. He had seemed to make it
his mission to make sure that Remus was having a good night tonight. He seemed to always be
offering Remus more drinks or making conversation with him when he got quiet for too long.

James was also acting as the social butterfly tonight. He was bouncing off the walls and had been
since the party had begun. James liked to drink at parties, but he usually didn't drink too much, so
that he could still practice quidditch the next day. For some reason that did not seem to matter,
because James had shown no sense of control through the night. It made Remus curious as to why
James had felt the need to drink so much.

He figured James probably just missed his bunny. Merlin, Bunny was such a ridiculous nickname
to call James’s boyfriend. He wasn't sure he would ever get used to it, but since James denied them
actually dating, he figured it was safer to call him that instead of a boyfriend. While James had
maintained that the only reason he didn't share the identity of his mystery mad was that the other
boy didn't want people to know, Remus secretly wondered if James also didn't want the marauders
to know.

James didn't lie, like ever. In fact, he was a dreadful liar, the only time he really managed a
convincing lie was when it came to protecting his best friend's secrets. He only did that because he
loved them and truly wanted to make sure they didn't get hurt. Kames was pretty much an open
book other than that. Except now he had a secret with another person, someone he hadn't known all
that long. Remus figured James must really like Bunny or he wouldn't be able to keep their
relationship sacred, especially from the Marauders.

Remus sort of missed that feeling, the one he was sure James was experiencing with his boyfriend.
The feeling of getting to know someone you really like and letting them in on your secrets. That
feeling never really lasted long in Remus’s relationships, as he never really could be 100% honest
with his lovers. Not to mention the relationships never quite measured up to what he had developed
in his mind and that usually meant they didn't last all that long. Remus would like to be able to say
that the reason his relationships ended abruptly was a fundamental difference but deep down he
knew the real reason he wasn't satisfied with his relationships. It was because no man would ever
measure up to Sirius Black. Sirius was the gold standard of men for Remus and he couldn't help but
compare everyman to him.

He wished with all his heart that he didn't feel this way about his best friend but he couldn't help
himself. He was enamored with Sirius and he knew it would only end in heartbreak for him.
Someday Sirius was going to meet a girl that he loved and could really connect with, then he would
marry her and Remus would probably still be alone because he couldn't find a man he wanted as
much as his best friend.

Sometimes he imagined a life where Sirius did like men, not only that but he was in love with
Remus. He would imagine scenarios where Sirius would kiss him for real, not only a kiss on the
cheek for a laugh. He would imagine that his friend's playful touches were intimate. He knew that
this was unhealthy as it would never come true for him.

Even looking at the man right now was a bit painful. Sirius was slowly sucking on his cigarette
and then blowing the smoke out in a way Remus could help but find seductive. Remus could smell
the tobacco on his breath when he spoke and it made him wish he could kiss his friend's lips. He
didn't know why he found the smell of tobacco on his friend so endearing while on himself he
hated it. When Remus smelled of cigarettes it made him feel poor and unwashed, but Sirius seemed
just as wealthy as he grew up even when he smelled of tobacco.

He sort of wished he could breathe in the smoke his friend was blowing out. He actually started to
lean closer before his intoxicated mind realized what he was doing. Merlin was a pervert. He
slapped against his forehead, mentally chastising himself.

“Alright, Moony? Why did you hit yourself?”

Remus’s face flushed in embarrassment, “Yeah...Yeah...I'm alright. I was just thinking that a
cigarette sounded pretty good right now.”

Sirius grinned at him and Remus felt his heart stop, “Well, why didn't you say so? Here.”

Remus took the cigarette from him and inhaled, deeply letting the smoke fill his lungs. The
familiar burn calmed his nerves instantly. Merlin, he didn't know why he ever let James talk him
into these little stints of quitting smoking. It's not as if the tobacco would damage his body any
more than he did to himself on the full moon.

Remus took a few more drags before handing it back to Sirius, “Thanks Pads.”

Sirius didn't respond, too preoccupied taking a drag himself. Remus realized that in a very indirect
way, the two of them had just touched lips, which made his stomach clench. When he looked up
from Sirius’s lips he saw that Sirius was staring at him with a thoughtful expression.
Remus, who was embarrassed to be caught looking at his friend's lips, quickly tried to distract
Sirius, “Uhmm... So you know what Prongs told me tonight?”

Sirius snapped out of his gaze and quickly took another drag, “What did Prongsie say?”

“He told me that the reason he wanted you to speak French was because he wanted to see if it made
him feel the same way it did when he…..ya know his Bunny speaks French.”

Sirius’s eyes widened in surprise, “Really? James’s Bunny speaks French, does he? Wow, do you
think it's possible that James is seeing a prudish pureblood as my parents raised me to be?”

Remus laughed at his friend's joke. Then the more he considered it the more he thought that it was
possible. James probably wouldn't want to introduce him to them if he was a prudish pureblood
they'd make fun of. Remus had assumed James would be worried his Bunny would embarrass him
in front of his friends but maybe James was worried his friends would embarrass him in front of his
boy. Remus really hoped this wasn't the case, “Yeah I suppose that's possible.”

Sirius shrugged as if he couldn't care less, but Remus knew that it was the opposite. Sirius was
actually dying to know who his best friend spent so much time with. He wanted to know who the
person who had taken James away from him so often lately. Sirius. Sirius was feeling anxious, that
he didn't know anything about James. Even though the two boys often acted as if they were
attached at the hip, they really weren't.

That is why Remus secretly wondered whether Sirius was actually a bit jealous of his friend's
relationship. Sirius seemed to get irrationally annoyed when James would leave to meet his
boyfriend. When James would come back Sirius would pretend like everything was normal and he
hadn't just been pissed off the whole time James had been gone. Remus didn't think it was because
James was with another guy, as his friend had never had a problem when Remus would go off with
his boyfriends. Although sometimes if Remus came back with a hickey on his neck then Sirius
would glare, but Remus figured it was just because he didn't want to think about his friends in a
sexual manner.

When James came back with a goofy grin looking extremely satisfied Sirius would try to avoid the
subject. Now Sirius definitely didn't have any problem with James being happy, so that couldn't be
why he got annoyed. Remus wasn't certain that Sirius was jealous of James’s relationship but it was
the only reason he could think of for his issue when James would sneak off. Maybe Sirius was just
looking for someone to be able to put a goofy grin on his face after a thorough snogging session as
well.

Remus was shaken out of his thoughts when Sirius groaned, “Merlin, I hope not. I don't think I
could handle hanging out with a prudish git.”
“You're assuming that he is actually going to let us meet him eventually. Besides, you don't know
that he is prudish, even if he does speak French. I'd say that with all the marks James walks around
with, he is far from a prude.”

The two of them started laughing at the thought of their friend who was always oblivious to the
fact that he had hickeys on his neck when he got back from his little rendezvous, “You might be
right. I am hoping that he eventually introduces us to the guy he's practically obsessed with.”

Remus agreed completely and to be honest each time James came back to the dorm looking like the
cat that ate the canary, he felt his desire to know who he was seeing grow stronger. Sirius spoke
again, interrupting Remus’s thoughts, “So James was wondering if my French sounded as good as
his little Bunny’s did? "

Remus nodded and Sirius smirked, “So what did he say? Did he like hearing me speak it? Did I get
Jamie’s pecker going more than his boyfriend's French did?”

Remus’s face burned because Sirius’s French may not have done anything for James but it
certainly had for Remus. He covered up his embarrassment with a nervous laugh and shoved Sirius
lightly, “You are so gross.”

Sirius burst out laughing and when he caught his breath he caught Remus’s eye, “So did he?”

Remus rolled his eyes at his friend's ego, “No. In fact, he said that you had nothing on Bunny.”

Sirius glared and then shook his head, “Please I could crush this Bunny in my sleep. James is just
too enamored to realize that I sound sexy as hell when I speak French.”

Remus couldn't believe his own ears when he heard himself, “So why don't you?”

Why the fuck would he say something like that?

Sirius quirked his head and looked at Remus before slowly speaking, “Je le ferais, mais je ne
voudrais pas vous faire germer du bois chaque fois que vous me voyez, n’est-ce pas?"
Remus’s eyes widened. Fucking Merlin, that sounded even better than it had earlier. While he had
not a clue what Sirius had just said to him he knew that it had sounded sexy as hell. Damn it was
probably a good thing that Sirius didn't speak French often or Remus might never be able to walk
around comfortably again.

He sputtered but couldn't manage to get a word out. His mouth was practically gaping and he knew
he probably looked insane. All he could hope for was for Sirius to chalk it up to drunkenness. Or at
the very least would remember the pureblood manners he was raised with and have the decency to
not mention it.

Sirius didn't say anything, but he did smirk at Remus and the two just looked at each other for a
minute. Until Sirius's smile faded a bit, “Umm.” He licked his lips nervously, “You know, I spoke
to James about his relationship.“

“Did you?”

“Yeah I did and he told me that they had started out as a fling. It only started because when they
were arguing one day, one of them had the bollocks enough to kiss the other out of nowhere. James
doesn't remember who made the first move exactly, but he remembers that it had been a shocking
one. Their relationship sort of snowballed from there and just look at them now, they spend
practically every night together.”

Remus didn't know how he had expected James’s relationship to have started but it certainly wasn't
that was. He couldn't comprehend how one could be in an argument with another and then just kiss
the other person without knowing whether the other party would be interested. He wished he had
the bollocks to be able to do something like that. He couldn't imagine taking James’s move and
using it on Sirius. Kissing him out of the blue and gambling whether the boy would respond or not.
He knew that it would be a ridiculously stupid move, but nonetheless, he longed to try it.

He never got a chance to try it himself though. When his eyes flickered back up from Sirius’s lips
to his eyes he was surprised by the intense look his friend was giving him. The two stared into each
other's eyes for neither was willing to break eye contact with the other. He felt like he was in a
trance as Sirius slowly leaned closer.

Remus couldn't even comprehend what was happening, he was so focused on looking into the most
beautiful eyes he'd ever seen. He had only realized how close they were getting a moment before
the eyes flickers close, it felt like a dream. Then Sirius’s lips met his and Remus just melted.
He suddenly knew that this couldn't be a dream, because when he dreamed of this, Sirius’s lips
never tasted this sweet. It was the absolute perfection of a kiss. Sweet, gentle, and a little hesitant.
Remus knew that he had not reacted right away, from the shock and bliss of the moment, but he
quickly amended that. He slowly moved his lips against Sirius’s and let himself be pulled into the
moment. He still couldn't believe that Sirius was doing this but he decided that he shouldn't worry
about it at the moment. This was probably the only time he was going to get to experience this and
he wanted to enjoy every moment. Remus just about died when Sirius put his hand on the side of
his face and deepened the kiss. It was such a beautifully intimate kiss that Remus knew that he
would remember for the rest of his life.

That's when they heard a wretched gagging sound and the two pulled out of the kiss in surprise.
James had just thrown up all over the rug in front of the fire. Sirius cursed, “Fuck. Seriously
Prongs?”

Remus was cursing on the inside as well. As much as he loved James, he couldn't help but be angry
about the timing James had. Now whenever Remus thought about the time his dream of kissing
Sirius came true, he also remembered the smell of Prongs’s barf. Ugh, sometimes he hated his
friends.

The two boys went and grabbed their friend and quickly muttered a scourgify for the rug, making
sure there wasn't a trace left. They drug him up the stairs and into the bathroom, where he became
acquainted with the toilet bowl. The entire time they sat there with him, James couldn't stop
apologizing and telling them how much he loved them. Meanwhile, Sirius and Remus were just
trying to avoid eye contact with each other as much as was possible in a tiny bathroom with three
grown men in it.

Once James was officially done feeling sick, they cleaned him up and made him brush his teeth
before putting him to bed. The two of them tucked him in and Remus couldn't help but feel like a
parent. Although to be fair the amount of time James had set out water and pepper up potions on
the rest of the marauder's bedside table after a night of drinking far surpassed the nights James
needed to be taken care of. So neither Remus nor Sirius minded even the slightest taking care of
their friend, Remus just wished he hadn't been kissing Sirius when James needed him.

Sirius leaned over and kissed James on his forehead in a loving way that made Remus both want to
laugh and made him feel extremely jealous, “Night Prongs. Love you, man.”

James giggled in a silly way that made Remus smile, “I love you too, Prongs. You took Moony.
You guys are the best.” James turned on his side and immediately started to fall asleep. As they
were walking away from the bed they heard him mumble, “I miss my Bunny.”

The two boys close the curtains and look at each other, almost wanting to laugh at the last
statement James had made. If the two hadn't known exactly what the code for Bunny was, they
would assume James was talking about his stuffed animal. Which made it all the funnier, but either
way it was sweet. James must really, really like this guy.

Remus wasn't sure what to do now. After the kiss downstairs he wasn't sure how to act around his
friend. Sirius must've been in a familiar situation because he just leaned up against his bedpost
looking at Remus. Remus, who was standing a few feet back from him, looked right back. The
tension in the air was palpable.

Sirius was the first one to break the silence, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly, “About
what I just di-”

“It's fine. It's fine, I had no problem with it.”Remus couldn't help but interrupt him.

Sirius looked at him questioningly, “You didn't?”

Remus nodded, and Sirius seemed a bit relieved at that answer. Remus wondered if Sirius was
feeling just as nervous and uncertain as he was. Sirius, the most confident and experienced
marauder, was nervous around Remus? The thought was almost laughable. Remus by nature was
awkward and indecisive, but technically he was more experienced than Sirius when it came to
snogging men, so maybe that was the cause of Sirius’s unease.

He took a step forward, gauging Sirius’s response to see whether his friend would allow them to
get closer. Sirius didn't move, he just looked at Remus with an interested twinkle in his eyes. When
Remus was close Sirius flicked his gaze to his lips, that was when the wolf in Remus pounced.

He surged forward, pressing Sirius to the bedpost, kissing him deeply. He captured Sirius’s hands
in his one and pinned them above his head, using his other hand to hold Sirius's face. This kiss was
turning out to be a lot deeper than the one downstairs had been and soon Remus’s tongue found
Sirius’s, he swore he saw fireworks behind his eyelids.

Sirius’s lips were so soft and hot that Remuswanted to capture this memory in a pensive so he
could relive it forever. All these years he dreamed of what kissing Sirius would be like and he was
finally finding out it was better than he ever expected. He knew that once they were both sober, the
odds of them kissing again were very low, so he was going to experience the moment to the fullest.

The two kissed longer than they probably should have, only stopping when they heard Peter
shifting in his sleep. He wasn't getting out of bed, but it broke them out of their trance and the two
parted awkwardly. Stuttering out good nights and slipping into their own beds. Remus wasn't sure
what Sirius’s dreams looked like that night, but he certainly knew who he dreamed of, Sirius
Black. Only Sirius Black and he had never slept so peacefully in his life.

**************************************************************************************

It had been about three days since the whole kissing incident, Remus and Sirius had not spoken a
word about it. In fact, Sirius had essentially pretended if it hadn't happened. He was so good at
pretending that Remus had debated whether it had actually taken place and wasn't just his
imagination.

He wasn't exactly surprised that Sirius was pretending it didn't happen. Remus knew that Sirius
more than likely regretted it and he was just glad Sirius hadn't taken the time to tell Remus this
directly. He didn't know if he could handle hearing that it had all been a mistake, so he didn't.

Instead, he avoided being alone with Sirius and attempted to act like everything was normal. If
Sirius saw that their friendship was ruined, then maybe he wouldn't feel that conversation was
necessary.

At this very moment, he was in the library avoiding Sirius, who had detention with Flitwick. Peter
had considered joining him but after Magdalene had sent him a note during class, he was nowhere
to be found. Remus often considered comparing the two of them to bunny rabbits with how much
time they spent in a bed together, but James was just as bad. He has been missing in action more
often lately and Remus didn't struggle to come up with a reason for those absences.

The last couple of days, it had seemed as if James was trying to talk to Remus alone, but Sirius was
always around lately. Remus wasn't sure what James wanted to discuss with him but he figured it
would be preferable to the conversation he was avoiding having with Sirius.

He had been studying in the library for hours, in an attempt to get a jump on the NEWT studying
he would definitely need for the next year. Remus was just taking a breather, trying and failing not
to think about how hard it was going to be to find a job after he graduated when he spotted James.
This was odd because James usually avoided the library like the plague.

James walked towards him with a purpose and sat down at Remus’s table, setting down the few
books he had with him, not bothering to open them.
“Alright Moony?”

“Yeah Prongs. I thought you hated the library? What are you doing here?”

“Oh, I was at my tutoring session and then I saw you.”

Tutoring session? Why would James be at a tutoring session? First of all the boy couldn't even drag
himself to Remus’s study sessions and Second of all the boy was quite intelligent. He certainly
didn't need tutoring and if he did why would he not as Remus?

“Tutoring session?”

James smiled shyly and scratched the back of his neck, “Yeah, umm…This is actually only my
second tutoring session.”

That did not answer Remus’s question, “But why are you being tutored?”

James shrugged, “With NEWT’s coming up, I just wanted some extra help.”

Remus understood the desire to be prepared, he had spent all summer studying. He was surprised
that James was already worried about them though. James wasn't usually one to get anxiety over
exams, “Really? Wow James, I never thought you cared that much.”

“Of course, I care. Come on Moony, it's the rest of our lives.”

Remus nodded his head, feeling a little ridiculous now for doubting his friend, “Okay uhm well
good on you then. Who's your tutor though? I could have helped if you needed it.”

“I actually went to Professor McGonagall and mentioned wanting a tutor, she ended up assigning
me one herself.”

Remus raised his eyebrow in confusion. He didn't know Professor McGonagall was in the habit of
finding tutors for students who didn't strictly need one for classes, “Who did she pair you with?”
James suddenly looked nervous before asking, “Do you promise not to tell anyone if I tell you?”

James didn't want the other marauders to know who his tutor was? This was just getting more
curious by the second, “I promise.”

“Uhh…It's Regulus Black. “

Remus gaped at James. Regulus Black was James’s tutor? As in Sirius’s brother, Regulus. As in
Regulus who had a literal mental breakdown from overstudying just two months ago? Why the hell
would McGonagall pick him to be James’s tutor.

“What the fuck? Why would she assign you to him?”

James schooled his face into a grim expression before shrugging, “Yeah I know that was my
reaction when I found out too. But apparently, he's somewhat of a genius and she thought he’d be
the best tutor for me to learn from.”

“But…but...There are so many other people she could choose. Lily, Me, or Frank even.”

James nodded and spoke softly, “Yeah, I suggested all of you too, but she said that being tutored by
someone I am friends with wouldn't help. That I should be tutored by someone different from
myself and I suppose there's no one more different than me, then Regulus Black.”

Remus nodded, still a bit flustered by this news. He supposed that it made sense, but it was still an
odd move for the professor to make. He did not understand why she would do this, “So you don't
want me to tell Sirius, that's why you made me promise.”

James nodded, “Yeah. It's not that I want to lie to him, but I just don't think that he'll take this
information well, and to be honest, I need to do well in my Newts and I don't want to deal with all
the drama of the Sirius and Regulus show.”

He understood not wanting to deal with drama. James didn't like drama, he was one of the most
honest people Remus knew. Still, it felt weird to be keeping a secret like this from Sirius. Then
again he supposed Sirius and he was keeping their kiss a secret from James and Peter. So maybe a
lie here and there was okay in the name of keeping a friendship together.

“Yeah, I understand. Still, it's weird though.”

“Yeah, totally weird. I don't know if I'm ever going to get used to it, but Regulus for the most part
focuses on the studies which make it easier.”

Regulus did always seem like the studious type, so Remus wasn't exactly surprised by this
information. Remus wondered why McGonagall would let Regulus add tutoring to his strict
regulations, but he supposed she had her reasons, “I'm surprised they want him tutoring with what
happened a few months ago.”

“She didn't really say anything about that, my guess is he made a deal with her or something. But I
am really not sure.”

Again, Remus nodded of course James wouldn't know anything more. It's not like he talked to
Regulus on a daily basis.

After a minute of silence, Remus who was still processing the information he just received, had his
thoughts interrupted by James who cleared his throat looking nervous, “So listen I actually am here
to talk to you about something in particular. I've been trying to talk to you alone for days but Sirius
always seems to be there.”

Remus could understand that as he had noticed the same thing, “Yeah I am not sure what that's
about but he does seem to be hanging around a lot lately.”

"Yeah, he's definitely been a step away from a stage five clinger lately, but either way I… I need
your advice on something.”

Remus was surprised, his eyebrows raised encouraging James to continue.

James became serious, suddenly and raised his wand muttering a muffliato spell, so that their
conversation could not be heard by others. Remus was very intrigued now, “You know you can
talk to me about anything James.”
James smiled, “ Yeah, I know. That's why I wanted to ask you about a delicate situation.
Uhm….It's a little awkward for me to be asking you this, but there's honestly nobody else I would
ever think of asking and the books I was trying to research with were either too descriptive or not
descriptive enough. I honestly felt embarrassed just reading them-”

“James, you can just ask me, ya know?”

“Uh yeah.” James scratched the back of his neck, “Okay so you know how I'm in a relationship?”
Remus nodded, not sure where this was going, “So…hypothetically if someone wanted to take the
next step in their relationship. In the manner of, like ya know…..sex. How would one do that?”

Remus was stunned. He truly had no idea what to say. Was James seriously asking him how to
have sex with another man?

He cleared his throat, embarrassed before speaking, “Umm…and by sex you mean?”

“I mean like actual sex. Sex all the way with another man."

Unfortunately, that is what Remus thought he’d meant. He wasn't exactly sure what to say, so he
thought he'd clarify. Clearing his throat he spoke, “Uhh…Yeah of course mate. What do you want
to know? The basics or more details?”

James, clearly embarrassed, spoke again, “Well…I-I don't want to know the specifics of what you
do, but I just want to know enough to make it good for him.”

Remus nodded, wincing a little bit. He had never thought he would have to share his own private
details with his best friend, but James was his best friend and Remus owed him a lot, “Uhh….Okay
so if it's his first time as well.” Remus paused waiting for James’s confirmation that this was true
and when he received a curt nod he continued, “Well then you are going to have to be very careful
with him. Uhh… Do you know whether you are going to be on the giving or receiving end?”

James spoke in a relatively confident voice for this awkward conversation, “We actually discussed
that and I will be at the top or on the giving end of things.”

“Okay umm…well that's good because, to be honest, I am much more familiar with that role. Just
to be clear though, I am not an expert, but I will tell my suggestions from the little experience I
have.” James nodded in understanding and Remus continued, “So the biggest thing you are going
to have to worry about is preparation. You want it to feel good for him, so you need to make sure
he is very prepared before you actually have sex. So definitely warm up into it with kisses and
touches, just overall making him feel safe. And once you work up to the point where you both are
feeling ready, you'll have to prepare him.”

James, who was extremely focused on Remus’s words, questioned, “Prepare, how do I do that?”

Remus grimaced, not wanting to discuss these details with his friend but knowing he should, “Uh
yeah so you are going to need a lubricant, I suggest the muggle stuff for the first time. Do not just
use saliva, trust me it is never enough. Then you are going to want to lube a couple of fingers and
uh… put them in him, start with one and only add when he seems comfortable. You can definitely
ask him when he feels comfortable too, communication is very important.”

The more he described the more Remus’s face flamed in embarrassment. James also seemed a bit
embarrassed but he mostly focused on learning from Remus which made it easier for him, “Uhm so
I put my fingers in him, and that stretches him, but how long do I do that for?”

“Yeah, it sort of depends on your partner. Like I said communication is key so definitely ask him if
he's ready before you actually do it. Oh, and you should definitely wear a condom.”

James seems confused, “What's that?”

Remus groaned, “It's a muggle contraption that you wear on your…” Remus pointed down at his
own crotch and continued, “It prevents pregnancy, which is obviously not a problem, but it also
prevents any diseases passing between the two of you. So you should probably wear them. Also,
make sure to lubricate the condom once you put it on too, it will make everything much smoother.”

James finally blushed and looked down, now embarrassed while Remus had been mortified the
entire conversation.

“Also don't be rough with him, start slow and see how it goes. Give him time to adjust as you go in
because even with the preparation it will probably still hurt a bit. I know you've had sex with
women before so I doubt you need to hear much more, but I should probably tell you that there is a
spot in men that when you rub against it they get pleasure out of it. So if you are trying to make
sure he has a good time, maybe try to find that.”
James nodded, “Where would that be?”

Remus shrugged, “I'm not sure. I've found it a couple of times but it's never the same for any man,
so just…you know, try your best. You'll know once you hit it.”

“Anything else?”

Remus shook his head, “Not that I can think of, I mean like I said, just be careful and try to make it
intimate. Then it should be good.”

James nodded and then the two sat in silence for a couple of minutes before James spoke again,
“Well thank you for the Moony. Even though I know that was the worst conversation of your life.”

Remus laughed suddenly, realizing how ridiculously funny that whole conversation was, “Yeah, it
definitely was. But anything for you James, besides I’d rather you ask me than try to get your
answers from a book.”

James flushed at that and laughed.

Remus was quick to change the subject to something a lot less disturbing and quickly brought up
the upcoming quidditch match. Even though Remus didn't enjoy quidditch he was happy to be
away from the extremely awkward conversation they had just had.

Even though it had been a very awkward conversation it had reminded Remus of what it was like to
be intimate with someone for the first time again. He couldn't help but picture doing the whole
beginning of the relationship with Sirius. Then he wanted to slap himself in the face for being so
hopelessly stupid.

*****************************************************************************************

Remus had been successfully avoiding Sirius for the past few days. In fact, he had done such a
good job, that he had barely even made eye contact with Sirius lately. He had managed to avoid
talking to Sirius beyond simple pleasantries while not alerting James or Peter that there was tension
between them. He wasn't sure if Sirius had realized that Remus was avoiding him, but he hoped
not.
If Sirius had noticed, then it was probably because he wanted to get Remus alone to tell him that
the whole night was a mistake. Remus didn't think that he could handle hearing those words, so
instead, he avoided the conversation. He would describe it as one of the best nights of his life and
he didn't want anything to spoil that memory. Even if Sirius did regret his actions, which Remus
was sure he did, he absolutely didn't want to hear him say it. He would rather the two-act as if
nothing happened and let the matter drop.

At this very moment, Sirius along with James and Peter were in the Gryffindor common room,
playing wizard’s chess. They had begun a weekly tournament every Wednesday to see who was
the superior strategist. While Remus didn't mind wizard’s chess, he never felt it prudent to join in
on the tournament as he had so much studying to do anyways. He had NEWT’s coming up and he
knew that it was a much more worthy thing to spend time on than a silly game.

It suited him just fine to do his studying while the other Marauders were busy, as they were known
to be more distracting than helpful. In fact, it suited him better than just fine as it was another way
for Remus to avoid Sirius. He figured eventually James and Peter would catch on to his little
avoidance game, but he hoped by that time Sirius would have dropped the idea of talking to Remus
about it.

Remus just couldn't bear the idea of hearing that the kiss was a mistake and would never happen
again. Once he heard those words, his dreams would really be crushed, or more accurately his
delusions. For now, though, he could pretend that Sirius and his were possible.

While Remus wanted more than anything to tell SIirus how he felt, he was too afraid of hearing
that his feelings weren't reciprocated. I mean how could they possibly be reciprocated? He would
never have Sirius the way Marlene had. He would never get to freely kiss Sirius and flirt with him
effortlessly. No, Sirius wasn't and would never be his.

Actually, Sirius would never be anyone's, he would never allow himself to be considered a
possession, not after the way his parents treated him. Remus knew that if Sirius ever did fall in love
with someone then their relationship would always have to be on his terms because he had spent
too much of his life not in control. Remus knew that if he was with Sirius he wouldn't mind the
boys needing to be in control of his life and relationship.

He was currently walking down to the library to study, but he wasn't too far from the common
room yet. He was sort of in his own head when he heard someone yelling his name.

“Remus! Moony wait up!”

Remus turned his head to peek behind him and quickly caught the eyes of Sirius Orion Black.
Fuck. Remus quickly turned away and continued walking, his pace a bit brisker than before.

Rationally Remus knew that this was a stupid idea and there was no way Sirius wouldn't realize
that he was avoiding him now, but right now he’d do just about anything to avoid having this
conversation now. He didn't think that he could handle having his heart hurt, not when the full
moon was coming up so quickly.

Suddenly Remus’s arm was grabbed and he was forced to stop. He silently cursed and turned to
look at his friend, “Remus stop, didn't you hear me?”

Remus responded, “Oh sorry, I guess I didn't hear you.”

He completely avoided eye contact with Sirius, but he could feel his eyes on the side of his head,
“You didn't hear me? You stopped, made eye contact with me, and then you walked away.”

“Oh, I thought you were somebody else.”

Sirius scoffed, ” Somebody else? Somebody else that looks exactly like me, with who you've
shared a room for five years?

Remus shrugged, “I don't know, but I thought it looked kind of like your brother.”

Sirius made an offended noise as he did every time he was compared to his brother. Which Remus
thought was kind of funny considering the two actually quite looked alike, besides a couple of
small differences.

“You thought I was my brother? Merlin Remus, you really know where to hit somebody where it
hurts.” He didn't wait for Remus to respond before he spoke again,” So hey, I was wondering if I
could talk to you for a couple of minutes?”

Remus could feel his heart racing, oh Merlin, why right now? Why couldn't Sirius just take a hint
and let the memory of their kiss just burn out, “Uh, I'm actually pretty busy right now.”
“You're busy? You're going to the library right now for extra studying and you study all the time.
You can manage a few minutes for me, can't you?”

“I really need to study as much as I can with NEWT’s coming up and everything.” Sirius was silent
for a moment before he suddenly grabbed Remus’s arm and pulled him into a classroom on their
left. An empty classroom that looked like it hadn't been used in decades, “What the hell Sirius?”

“What the hell? Are you kidding me with how you're acting right now? What the hell is wrong
with you?”

Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius' tantrum, “Nothing is wrong with me, Sirius. I just didn't feel like
talking about whatever you wanted to talk about.”

Sirius crossed his arms leaning against the back of the door so Remus couldn't make his escape.
What did he think that Remus was gonna do? Push him over to get to the door? He wasn't a God
damn heathen, now was he?

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

Remus's eyes widened. He should have known that Sirius would notice, but then again, Sirius had
never been particularly observant, “I haven't been avoiding you, exactly.”

“Oh, you haven't been avoiding me, really? That whole maneuver you tried to pull in the hallway,
that wasn't avoiding me? The fact that you never make eye contact with me, even when I'm
speaking to you lately. And what about the fact that you only speak to Peter and James now, never
to me. What about that?”

Remus shrugged, crossing his own arms, not trying to not look like he was too defensive, but he
couldn't help it. Sirius was calling out every avoiding tactic that Remus had pulled in the last
couple of days. Sirius spoke again, softer this time and less accusing, “Is this because of the kiss?”

Remus, who had had his eyes resting on the floor, trying to avoid Sirius' gaze, swung his head up
at this question. He hadn't expected Sirius to mention it so casually. Fuck this conversation was
going to hurt so bad, but even if it hurt he had to make sure he didn't look hurt. He did not want
their friendship to be ruined over this.
Remus stuttered but Sirius cut him some slack and spoke again, “Listen, I don't want that to ruin
our friendship or anything. I know I probably shouldn't have just kissed you like that without
asking or anything. I know that just because you're gay does not mean that you necessarily have
feelings for me but I just-”

“You were curious, “Remus found his voice quick, and even saying those words hurt a bit. He was
a bit that Sirius was fully acknowledging his role in everything, so maybe that was a positive in this
fucked up encounter.

Sirius looked into his eyes before speaking again, “I don't know, curious is a good word for it, I
suppose, but it's not exactly the word I'd use. I mean, listen I'm just going to put this all out on the
table. I don't want you to hate me after everything, but I feel like honesty is the best policy,
especially when I totally took advantage of you.”

Remus, his eyes widened and he gasped out in disbelief, “You took advantage of me?”

Sirius nodded grimly, “Yeah and I'm so sorry. As I said, I definitely should have realized that you
probably didn't want anything to do with me. Just because you're gay doesn't mean you necessarily
like your friends. I know that, but for some reason, at the time it had seemed like the best idea. I
don't want you to think that I'm going to take advantage of you again, you were way too drunk for
me to be doing that.”

“You were drunk too.”

Sirius nodded, but then bit his lip looking up at Remus, “Yeah I was, but I had sort of been
planning on doing this at some point. Although I hadn’t originally planned on you being drunk, and
that's my fault, and I'm sorry about that.”

Remus gaped at Sirius, “You planned on kissing me?”

Sirius nodded slightly, scratching the back of his neck nervously, “Okay so I don’t want this to ruin
our friendship, but I feel like I owe you an honest explanation. I have…. been having a lot of
thoughts about men since my breakup with Marlene, specifically thoughts of you.”

Remus couldn't believe what he was hearing, what the hell was Sirius even saying to him? Where
was this going?
Sirius continued speaking, “When we broke up, Marlene and I discussed whether she would ever
find a boy that made her feel right and whether I could find a girl that felt right. I think that it might
be possible that the reason I haven't been able to find someone that's right for me is that I haven't
been able to admit that I am not 100% straight.”

Remus couldn't believe his ears, “How did you figure this out?”

Sirius looked up again, gazing into Remus's eyes before speaking, ”I've always looked at guys and
thought they were attractive, but I never really thought much of that. Until I broke up with Marlene
and I was hanging around you a lot more. I mean I don't really know exactly how I feel right now,
but I have noticed that I am a bit attracted to you. That's the main reason why I decided to kiss you
and after the first kiss, I thought that I definitely would have to analyze my feelings for you. Then
you kissed me that second time and I knew that I couldn't be completely straight because that kiss
was unlike anything else I've ever felt.”

Remus gaped, not believing his ears. Was Sirius Black seriously saying he might be attracted to
Remus? That he might have feelings for Remus? Has hell frozen over?

Remus replied, not knowing exactly what to say, but knowing as a friend he should make
something clear, “You know Sirius just because you like men doesn't mean you have to like me.
I'm not gonna be mad that you used me as an experiment, trust me. I just want you to be happy.”

Sirius began shaking his head before Remus could even finish speaking, “No Remus, listen to me.
It's not just that I feel attraction for both boys and girls, but I think I have feelings for you
specifically. I mean look at Jamie, he's an attractive bloke that I love, but I feel absolutely no
attraction for him. I may find other guys attractive, but I don't feel the same way when I look at
them.”

Merlin, he was killing Remus. His voice came out in a whisper as he asked, “So what are you
saying, Sirius?”

“I-I am saying that I think I want to spend time with as….not just friends. Not that we have to rush
into anything, but if you want to and I want to then I feel like we owe it ourselves to see if there's
anything there right? I mean if I spend any more time thinking about this without actually doing
anything, I will go crazy.”

Suddenly Remus felt bad for avoiding Sirius these last few days because it was obvious that Sirius
had spent that time confused. Had Remus just talked to him right away then maybe Sirius could
have talked to him and they could have avoided a lot of pain on both their ends. Remus cleared his
throat, trying not to show his excitement at the prospect, “Yeah, I definitely would be interested in
spending time together. I do think slower is better though.”

Sirius grinned, but it was a nervous grin like he had no idea what to say next. Which Remus
understood because he also had no idea what to do next.

He did, however, speak next, “What should we do now then?”

Sirius looked absolutely lost but suddenly relieved, “Uhm well I think at some point we're going to
have to ditch Peter and James and hang out by ourselves. I don't mean just doing our late night
chats, but as we should actually spend a night together just us.”

“Are you saying that you want to go on a date? With me?”

Sirius’s face burned, which was not a regular occurrence for the boy. Remus felt a little bad for
ripping off the bandage and calling it as it was, but really how could Sirius expect to go on a date
with a man and not be able to call it a date?

“Uhh…Yeah I-I suppose that is what it would be. A date, I want to go on a date with another man.
I want to go on a date with you, Merlin does that sound crazy.”

Remus shrugged, “Not that crazy.”

After hearing that, Sirius seemed to grow a tad bit more confident, not much more though, “So we
are going to go on a day then? To Hogsmeade maybe?”

“There's not a Hogsmeade trip coming up.”

Sirius suddenly grinned mischievously and Remus took a moment to appreciate how much he
missed seeing that look in his friend's eyes. Lately, Sirius didn't seem capable of being mischievous
or carefree and Remus finally understood why.
"Come on Moony, we're Marauders. Do you really think that we won't be able to manage to sneak
out to Hogsmeade for an evening?”

Remus chuckled a little bit at his friend's teasing, “Well, I know we can but how are we going to
sneak out with James or Peter finding out?”

“So then you don't think we should tell Peter and James?”

Remus shrugged, “Well, I don't know. I figured you wouldn't want them to know, at least not right
away.”

“Yeah, I think that I'll need some time before I would be able to let anyone else in on this.”

Remus completely understood, so he nodded. Honestly, he wouldn't be surprised if Sirius had

wanted to keep everything under the wraps. He was still a bit shocked that Sirius even wanted to do
this, because honestly what did he even see in Remus. Maybe he just wanted to experiment with
someone he was comfortable with, if that was the case then Remus was going to use it to the fullest
extent. He didn't live the idea of being used but it was probably the only way he was ever going to
get to experience Sirius. Maybe he could even get Sirius to want to do this for longer than just an
experiment.

Sirius smiled at him, “So…um yeah. Let's go on a date then.”

Remus nodded in agreement before deciding that if Sirius wanted to do this then Remus was going
to find plenty of enjoyment in it. He could feel the animal in him rising to the surface and taking a
bit of control. He took a predatory step forward and Sirius took an unconscious step back. Sirius
had forgotten how close he was to the door and stepped back against it in surprise. He smiled
nervously at Remus while Remus grinned wolfishly at his friend.

Just as Sirius let out a deep breath and that was when Remus dove in and kissed him deeply. Their
kiss was passionate and burning in a completely different way than the kiss they had shared before.
Remus knew that it was dangerous to let his wolf have so much control, but he figured as long as
he kept one hand on the wheel they should be okay.

The two shared the kiss for a bit before Sirius fully gave in. He wrapped his arms around Remus’s
neck, he had to stretch to meet the taller boy's shoulders.

When the kiss finally broke, Remus assumed that the beast in him had finally settled back down,
 realizing that this was a friend and playmate.

The two may have parted lips but they stayed fairly close to each other, just looking into each
other's eyes. That is until Sirius took a deep breath and stepped back, creating space between them.
Remus loathed the space his friend had created between them, it was possible the wolf in him
wasn't completely gone from the surface yet.

“Wow Moony. Who knew you had it in ya?”

Remus smirked at him and winked flirtatiously, which was completely out of character for him,
“You have no idea. Don't worry though, you will soon enough.”

Sirius' eyes widened and sparkled a bit, but Remus figured that could've been a trick with the light.
Soon after the tension was broken when Sirius cracked a joke and the two traveled back up to the
common room. They hung out with the other two members of the marauders and pretended that
they didn't have a date planned.

Remus couldn't believe his luck and he was really curious to see if he could really manage to make
Sirius fall in love with him.

Chapter End Notes

French Translations (Or at least what I mean to say)

Vous êtes soit très ivre, soit très bizarre. Quoi qu’il en soit, je suis là pour ça, mon
frère= You are either very drunk or very weird. Anyway, I'm here for that, my brother

Je le ferais, mais je ne voudrais pas vous faire germer du bois chaque fois que vous me
voyez, n’est-ce pas?= I would, but I wouldn't want to make you sprout wood every
time you see me, would I?
 Bunnies and Bears
Chapter Notes

Okay so as I have received a couple of comments on the French I use, I want to be

clear about something, I do not know French. I honestly use google translate and hope
that it's at least comprehensive. I will probably continue to do that for any other French
I will use in my book, however, I am very open to critiques and suggestions to make
the French correct. I have updated and fixed what I am aware of but again I still don't
know French so there will probably be more issues with the translations later in the
book. I hope you enjoy this fluffy chapter!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Regulus

“I don’t think it's a good idea, Reg,” Remy whispered to Regulus from across the library table.
They had already been told to quiet down a few times by Madam Pince. Which was not a regular
occurrence for Regulus, then again he always seemed to do out-of-character things when he was
with Remy. Though he'd rather not lose his reputation as the librarian's most studious pupil, so he
made sure to keep it down.

Regulus rolled his eyes at Remy’s apprehension, “It's not like they're going to smite you, Rem.
Trust me I will make sure they are on their best behavior.”

She raised her eyebrow in a disbelieving manner, “Really? Even Crouch?” Regulus must've
grimaced or something because she smirked at his expression, “Yeah that's what I thought. Best
friend or not, you can't predict his actions, can you?”

Regulus silently cursed himself for not being able to control his facial expressions, even though he
had been taught to do so since birth. He had always been pretty good about hiding his feelings, but
for some reason, he is so more open and honest with Remy. He had been spending a lot of time
with Remy lately and he found himself wanting to have her meet his other friends.

While Remy was a half-blood, he was pretty sure that his friends wouldn't give her shit about it, at
least not to her face. They might give Regulus shit for their friendship but he found he didn't really
care. Usually, his friends didn't bother half-bloods, some of the other Slytherins did, but his friends
didn't seem to have a problem with them. He just didn't want to sneak around in his friendships and
friends from each other. He already had to hide enough with James.

“Okay no, I can't predict what he's going to do, but I guarantee you he's not going to be a dick
outright to you. He would probably only be bad if you were a muggleborn, but as a half-blood, you
should be fine.”

“As if that isn’t fucked up enough.”

Regulus backtracked, realizing he shouldn't have brought up muggle-borns, “Come on Remy. If

you meet them and at least become acquainted, maybe I wouldn't have to lie to them.”

She rolled her eyes at Regulus’s dramatics, “I don't know why you are lying to them anyways.
Who gives a fuck if you’re hanging out with me. Why would they care? It's not like you're giving
Rosier shit for hanging out with, literally the dumbest person at Hogwarts.”

Regulus couldn't help but laugh at his friend's impression of Mulciber, “Okay fair point, but
seriously think about it please.”

Remy rolled her eyes but then shrugged, “Fuck, fine Reg. I'll meet them sometime, but if it ends
badly, then you owe me.”

“Undoubtedly, thank you.” Regulus smiled at her but it quickly dropped when she asked her next
question.

“So now that I agreed to meet your friends, are you finally going to tell me who you've been
snogging lately.”

Regulus’s eyes widened in shock. How the hell had she known?

She laughed at Regulus’s expression, “Yeah that's what I thought. It's fairly obvious to anyone
paying attention, ya know?”

“Uh, I haven't been snogging anyone.”

“Come on Regulus, you don't have to tell me who it is, but let's agree not to outright lie to each
other. Just say that you don't want to tell me.”
Regulus huffed in frustration, “Fine. I don't want to tell you.”

She laughed slightly, “Fair enough. Okay, so are you going to help me with these star charts or
not?”

That was one of the reasons Regulus loved spending time with Remy. She never forced things and
she could recognize when Regulus was uncomfortable in a situation. He appreciated that she was
respectful of his boundaries, in a way his other friends weren't.

He finished helping her with her star charts and after they finished they parted ways. Regulus was
walking down the hall when he was suddenly grabbed and pulled into a broom cupboard. He didn't
even have to look to know that it was none other than James Potter.

Regulus felt his stomach fluttering slightly at seeing James and he quickly cursed his hormones.
Lately, it seemed as if Regulus's perfect composure completely slipped when confronted with
James Potter’s crooked smile and shaggy hair. It was frankly a bit humiliating and the problem
only seemed to be getting worse the more time he spent with James. That should be enough of a
reason to stop spending time with James altogether, but if Regulus was honest he wasn't sure he'd
be able to stop. He tended to miss James when he didn't see him every day and that thought scared
the shit out of Regulus.

A Lumos was muttered and there was James’s stupidly handsome face, smirking at Regulus, “Hey
gorgeous, fancy meeting you here.”

Regulus fought back the flush that was climbing to his cheeks. Why did James always have to
compliment him? It made it so much harder to fight his attraction for the boy. He slapped James on
the arm in response, unfortunately without any actual heat behind it. Merlin, he was going soft,
“Yeah it's the craziest thing. I was just minding my own business walking down the hall and I was
accosted and thrown into a cupboard.”

James laughed, showing his pristinely white teeth, “Don't be so dramatic Reggie. You were slightly
pulled, certainly not accosted or thrown anywhere.”

Regulus rolled his eyes but was fighting a smile, “And why was I “lightly pulled” into a broom
cupboard, James. I just saw you this morning.”
James smirked as if remembering their morning in Regulus’s dorm room, “It's never too soon to
see you again Reg. I just wanted to let you know that you should meet me in the Room tonight.”

Regulus furrowed his brows in confusion. While the two boys had quite a few sleepovers these last
couple of weeks, they usually didn't have them back to back, “Why?”

James smirked, but also looked sort of nervous at the same time. Like he was trying to cover his
nervousness with confidence, “Well I thought you might want to know that I did my research.”

Regulus didn't know what the hell James was talking about. They had only had a few tutoring
sessions and those mostly consisted of James shamelessly flirting and making innuendos the whole
time. Had Regulus assigned him research? He didn't think so, and if it was assigned for one of his
classes then why would he be telling Regulus about it? Regulus analyzed the conversations they
had in the last couple of weeks and –.

Fuck he couldn’t mean? Already?

Regulus knew his eyes were wide as he answered, “Um do you mean….”

James smiled and leaned closer to Regulus, nipping at his ear as he whispered, “So will you meet
me?”

Regulus nearly shivered at the feel of James’s breath on his ear, “Uh yeah I will be there.”

James leaned back and the two locked eyes in a meaningful stare. Regulus agreeing to come
tonight, meant a lot more than agreeing to their usual hookups. Regulus was nervous but
undoubtedly excited. Merlin this was embarrassing.

James leaned in and left a chaste kiss on Regulus’s cheek, “See you later baby.”

James was already leaving the closet when Regulus realized what the idiot had just called him. He
stepped out of the closet and yelled to James from down the hall, “Don’t call me that, Potter.”

He then realized that he had just yelled that out in a public corridor where anyone could be walking
through, and quickly scanned the hallways. Luckily it was deserted so Regulus could breathe
easily. Merlin James Potter made him undoubtedly more reckless and stupid.

*********************************************************************

When Regulus walked into the now-familiar room, he couldn’t believe his eyes. The room had
completely changed. The sofa was gone and instead, there was a large four-poster bed in its place.
The room was less spacious and more intimate. There were candles spread throughout the room in
a cheesily romantic way, that didn’t make Regulus completely sick. In fact, he sort of loved the
effort James put in. There was a fluffy black rug right in front of the fireplace and to the left of that,
there was a cart with a pitcher of water and two glasses next to it. There was also another bottle of
something there, this one smaller, that Regulus couldn’t quite make out. The most noticeable
change in the room were the decorations. The room was now fairly neutral in color, except for the
bed. Which appeared to have now red silk sheets. Of course, James had chosen red, the fucking
wanker.

And there he was, the most significant thing in this entire spectacular room. He was leaning next to
the fireplace in the most annoyingly suave way. Ugh, he was so handsome, it actually made
Regulus feel ill. Like right now, just looking at his grin, his stomach was full of knots. James was
in a surprisingly decent outfit for once, with muted colors. He was wearing a dark pair of trousers
and a darker gray t-shirt and those bloody Chuck Taylors, which Sirius was always obsessed with.
He looked good.

James, with his grin still intact, waved his hand over the room as if to show Regulus that this was
his doing, as if Regulus wasn’t aware of that, “So what do you think?”

Regulus tried to contain his smile at James’s eagerness and he schooled his face into a bored
expression, shrugging, “It’s alright. The reds a bit much.”

His facade must not have been what he thought it was because James seemed to see right through
his apathetic expression. He laughed at Regulus and stepped in closer, slowly like he was a deer
approaching his prey. Regulus didn’t know how he felt about being James’s prey, but he didn’t
think he minded it as much as he probably should, “Oh really? I like red. In fact, I was just
thinking, last night in bed in case you were wondering, how good you’d look in red. Or more
accurately splayed out naked against red sheets.”

Regulus felt his face flame and he quickly looked down, avoiding James’s eyes, so he didn’t seem
too lame. God forbid, James Potter, the most popular boy in Hogwarts, saw him blush and decided
that he was too lame to sleep with. That would really be the cake topper on his blissful life.
Deep down Regulus was very aware that James would never do that. He was also aware that James
was just as excited about this whole situation as he was, so he probably wouldn't even notice the
blush. He also realized that he couldn’t help these thoughts from flowing through his head when he
compared the monumental differences between the two boys. Really James shouldn’t want him,
but for some crazy reason he did and Regulus wanted him back.

“Aw, don’t turn away. I love when your cheeks get red. You are so hard to get a reaction out of, it
makes me feel special when you blush.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’s teasing as he stepped closer, “I feel like I am always blushing
around you.”

James, who was now right in front of Regulus grinned at him, tilting the Slytherins chin up so they
were looking in each other’s eyes, “So what do you think of the image I have of you on those
sheets?”

Regulus didn’t fight the blush this time, knowing that James reveled in it, “I think it’s ridiculous. I
look dreadful in red.”

James’s smile softened a bit and he brought his hand up and stroked Regulus’s cheek. Sending
shivers down Regulus’s spine until he almost forgot how to breathe, “I very much doubt that
anything makes you look dreadful Regulus Black.”

Merlin, why did he use his full name and why did it sound so good on his lips? The compliment
shouldn’t have caught him by surprise, as it seemed James was always complimenting him in one
way or another, but for whatever reason, he found himself at a loss for words.

James took pity on him, “So did you check in with whatever prefect was designated to make sure
you got to bed tonight?”

Regulus was glad for the change of subject, “Yeah I told him I was going to bed early and then I
snuck out when he wasn’t looking.”

James smirked at him and replied almost fondly, “You are devious.”
“That’s right, I am a real bad boy.”

James let out a loud laugh and then leaned into Regulus giving him a chaste but nonetheless
passionate kiss. He leaned away smiling slightly, “You are simply adorable Reg.”

Regulus, who was still getting himself together after the kiss James had just laid on him, huffed,
“Men aren’t considered adorable James.”

“Oh but you Regulus Black are an enigma, rules don’t apply to you.”

James Potter really knew how to stun someone to the point of incomprehension, with only a few
words. If anyone was an enigma of the two of them it was James Potter. In fact, it was almost
laughable that James found Regulus to be mysterious and aloof when he usually felt like an idiot in
front of him. He felt like he was always blushing or his retorts lacked his usual wit, it was frankly
embarrassing that Potter had an effect like this on him.

Once he cleared his mind enough he responded, “Wow James you certainly have a way with
words.”

James smirked at him, way too smug for his own good, “I appreciate that, especially coming from
someone as difficult to impress as you.”

“And there you go again.”

“What, you don’t like how charming I am?”

“Would we call it charming or extreme arrogance?”

James reached down and grabbed Regulus’s hand, entwining them together, “I think you find me
charming Reg, otherwise you wouldn’t be here. Maybe I am arrogant, but if I am then you enjoy it
because you are here with me on a Friday prepared to spend the night with me.”

Regulus couldn’t believe James’s arrogance, the man honestly had no shame whatsoever. Although
Regulus had to admit the arrogant bastard had a point. Regulus wouldn’t be there unless he was
completely enamored by James and his large ego.

“What if the only reason I am here is to use you and your pretty face for sex.”

Merlin why the fuck had Regulus just said that? His face flamed in embarrassment and for once it
wasn’t actually because of something James had said but his own words. James grinned at him and
Regulus cursed the Gryffindor’s ability to make him say stupid things.

“Well, I can’t complain about that now, can I? I don’t think you’ve ever called me pretty before.
Actually, I don’t think you’ve ever even told me that you find me attractive.”

“James, do you think that I would be snogging you every chance I got if I didn’t find you
attractive?”

James smiled mischievously at him, in a way that made Regulus feel a little nervous, “Maybe not,
but I think I need to hear you say it.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Why are you like this?”

“Come on Reggie. I tell you all the time how beautiful you are and you never so much as call me
cute. What’s the deal with that?”

“Are you actually a child? Why do you care whether I find you attractive or not?”

Now it was James’s turn to roll his eyes, “I know you find me attractive, you ponce. It’s more
about you actually telling me when you think something good about me because I am starting to
think you never have those thoughts while I get them all the time.”

“I get those thoughts too.”

“Okay so then why don’t you ever share them with me or really any of your thoughts? I never get
to hear about what you are thinking of and I feel like I share those with you all the time.”
“You do. You are the definition of an oversharer James Potter.”

James smiled at Regulus in a softer way than usual, “And you Regulus Black are the definition of
an undersharer.”

“Then I guess we are the perfect match then.”

James’s eyes lit up at that comment and Regulus wondered if James had had that exact thought. He
definitely had been thinking about how well James and he fit together, even though they had their
share of differences. James reached up one hand, his other still entwined with Regulus’s, and
brushed aside one of the Slytherins curls that had fallen in front of his eyes, “You read my mind,
Reggie.”

“I wish I could read your mind.”

James lightly kissed Regulus’s cheek, “All you have to do is ask.”

It couldn’t be that easy. Nobody was honest all the time and even if they were they didn’t want to
have their personal thoughts shared with others. Then again aside from the white lies that James
has told to keep his relationship with Regulus a secret, James seemed like an open book for the
most part. An open book, what a scary thought.

Regulus leaned in and brushed his own lips over James’s jawline, whispering, “Okay. Tell me
what you’re thinking.”

James grinned at Regulus and brushed his hand over his cheek, stroking him softly and intimately,
“I am thinking about how gorgeous you are. How it really should be illegal to look the way you
do.”

Regulus’ breath was taken right out of his chest, stolen from him as James’s words reached his
ears, or at least it felt that way. He found himself giving into James’s desires despite his anxiety
over showing any sort of vulnerability towards someone, “I think you are the most handsome boy I
have ever seen in my life. It embarrasses me how attractive I find you and your dreadfully messy
hair. Sometimes I see you across the Great Hall and I have the ridiculous urge to sit on your lap and
kiss you senseless. I have to drag my eyes away from you so people don’t notice, but I think if I
didn’t have that restriction I could spend all my time staring at you. Are you happy now?”
James gaped at him slightly before leaning in and kissing him. James moved his hands, one into
Regulus’s hair and the other on his lower back. James dipped him a bit, which made Regulus a bit
unstable but he couldn’t help but moan slightly at the feel of James against him. James’s body
molded against his own perfectly in a symbiotic rhythm that quite literally made Regulus feel
lightheaded.

The kiss itself was heated and smooth. Regulus wasn’t sure if it was smooth because James and he
were much more in sync with what the other liked and disliked now. For example, James loved
when Regulus nibbled on his lower lip but absolutely hated when there was too much tongue used
in a kiss. The two knew each other well enough that their kisses have gotten better with each
meeting. Now, James’s kiss was perfect for Regulus. It was gentle and a little rough, warm and
passionate, and his hands were always in the perfect place at the perfect time. Regulus wondered
whether James felt the same way about Regulus’s kisses.

When James pulled back and leaned Regulus back up, his hands were both on Regulus’s lower
back, “You have no idea how much I wish you would actually do that. The idea of you kissing me
in front of the entire school, in my lap for the world to see, showing everyone that Regulus Black is
mine and only mine. I dream about that moment.”

Regulus shook his head at the insane idea James had but even he had to admit he really didn’t hate
the idea. “You know that’s an impossibility James, but you paint a nice picture.”

James smiled at him and then slowly moved his hands down from Regulus’s waist to his arse,
“Thank you.”

Regulus didn’t know whether he should just relax and enjoy James’s touch or if he should be
offended at James’s high-handed grab of his arse. He didn’t have time to debate this idea as James
moved his hand a bit lower and suddenly hitched Regulus up, he wrapped his legs around James’s
waist instinctively. His arms didn’t have anywhere to go, but around James’s neck in an attempt to
control his stability. “Really James? You know you could ask, as a gentleman would.”

James let out a guffaw, “Yes Reggie, that’s exactly why you’re with me because I am a
gentleman.”

Regulus found James’s boisterous laugh to be way more charming than it should out to be. He
actually found himself smiling at James’s antics. Suddenly he wanted nothing more than to kiss
James, so he did.

James, who had sort of been laughing at the time, was a bit taken aback, but quickly recovered and
returned the kiss wholeheartedly. Regulus let himself become enveloped in the kiss and for the
first time all day, he let himself become more excited than nervous for the night. James had told
Regulus that he had done research and knew what he was doing and Regulus trusted him. Merlin,
Regulus trusted James Potter; that was a ridiculous thought, but he did.

The kiss quickly became more intense and Regulus could practically feel the shift towards the
night’s planned events. James broke the kiss and slowly began to kiss and suck Regulus’s neck
down to the collar bone making a trail. Regulus was embarrassed to say he was fully enveloped at
the moment. He was letting out breathy moans and was squirming against James eagerly. Damn
James knew that Regulus’s weak spot was just above his collar bone and he used that knowledge to
his full advantage.

Regulus scrambled for the opening of James’s shirt, fumbling around at the impossible buttons.
James, who must’ve been fed up with the buttons himself, began walking Regulus over to the bed,
which was only a couple of steps away. James unceremoniously dropped Regulus on the bed and
proceeded to unbutton his shirt quickly. Regulus sat on the bed and stared as James undid the
buttons, finding the motion of his hands a bit hypnotizing. As more of his skin was revealed
Regulus became more and more impatient.

Once the shirt was thrown to the floor James leaned down and enveloped Regulus’s lips with his
own once more. Regulus brought his hands up and stroked down James’s sides, feeling in the
toned warm skin under his fingertips. Merlin, why was James so fucking fit? It simply wasn’t fair.

James brought his hands down to Regulus’s own shirt and attempted to undo those buttons. He
groaned in frustration as the buttons refused to slip undone. Regulus didn’t have the heart to tell
him that he had bought this particular button up from a shop that boasted of a charm that made it
impossible to lose a button, so the buttons had to be undone slowly.

James must’ve been done trying because he suddenly ripped the shirt open from the front, and the
buttons scattered everywhere. Regulus’s first thought was to write to the shop and let them know
that their charm could be undone by a hormonal teenage boy. His second thought was that James
Potter must really want him and that he now owes him a new shirt.

“What the hell James! You owe me a new shirt.”

James smirked at him and leaned over Regulus with his arms holding him and whispered in the
younger boys’ ear, “I’ll buy you ten more shirts if you want, but if those are that bloody hard to get
open then I'll rip them off you too.”
Regulus’s eyes widened and he found he got a sick enjoyment out of seeing James frustrated and
more specifically seeing James rip open his shirt as if it was nothing. James didn’t give Regulus a
chance to respond before he kissed him once again. The two resumed their avid kissing until James
moved forward, making Regulus scoot back so they were both fully on the bed.

As the two kissed they both used their hands to explore the other bodies. Regulus, who was fully
enjoying getting to know all of James’s muscles, felt like he was getting the better end of the deal.
Although Regulus wasn’t nearly as toned as James, the Gryffindor still seemed to be enjoying
himself as he stroked over his abdomen. Regulus had to admit that he also enjoyed when James’s
hands were running over his body, it sort of made him feel coveted the way James glided his hands
softly.

“Fuck me, you are so hot Reggie.”

Regulus let out a gasp as James found the spot on his neck once more, panting he responded, “I
thought that was your role.”

James groaned at Regulus’s quip and began kissing his way down Regulus’s body. Slowly he left a
trail of hot kisses down his abdomen until he reached the top of Regulus’s trousers. With his lips
still pressed to Regulus’s skin he looked up at Regulus and their eyes met in a searing gaze. He
slowly undid Regulus’s pants and pulled them down, Regulus pushed himself up to assist this
process.

Suddenly Regulus was flipped onto his stomach, roughly. He felt his breath catch in anticipation
for what was to come. This was where it all began and he could feel his stomach twisting with
nerves. He also felt a little self-conscious that James was going to be seeing his most intimate area
in a few moments. He knew that realistically it shouldn't feel much different than when James
touched or sucked his cock, but for some reason it was. It was a definitely more intimate act and
showed just how much trust he had in James that he was encouraging it.

He felt hands on his ass, kneading the pale flesh in slow torturous movements. James took his time
feeling and looking while Regulus did what he could to control his breathing as to not seem too
eager. Then James was off him and Regulus could hear his footsteps, he tried to twist his head but
couldn't see him so he settled for asking, “Where are you going?”

His voice had come out raspy and he just knew that James could tell how turned on he was. James
returned just as quick as he left and set something on the bed before speaking, “Just grabbing some
lube Reggie, don't worry.”
Regulus breathed out and rested his head back on the sheets, trying to relax. James must've noticed
his nerves and asked, “Hey you still want to do this, right? If you don't that's okay with me too, just
let me know okay?”

Regulus groaned at James’s bullshit Gryffindor chivalry, if the boy was paying any attention he'd
be able to tell exactly how much Regulus wanted this, “I want this.”

James didn't reply but Regulus could practically hear the grin James undoubtedly had on his face.
Then he felt hands back on him and a slick, cold finger slid across his arse and found its way
between. Regulus knew what lube was but it felt weird to have it down there rather than what he
usually used for jerking off.

His finger rubbed across Regulus’s hole and Regulus felt himself tense before he forced himself to
relax. James pushed slightly and suddenly Regulus felt pressure as he began to slowly be fingered.
While James was incredibly careful and patient, Regulus really wasn't sure how he felt about it. It
didn't particularly feel good, it mostly just felt weird and uncomfortable. He hoped that the sex
wouldn't feel like this but he knew it was a possibility.

James was good about whispering encouragements to Regulus as he worked more fingers in.
Regulus didn't know if the encouragement was necessary as he wasn't really doing anything. He
was about to tell James that he didn't need to tell Regulus how good he was doing, when he
suddenly felt a burst of pleasure explode behind his eyelids.

James had changed the angle of his fingers slightly and Regulus had felt fireworks. What the hell
was that? Regulus must've moaned or something because suddenly James, sounding way too proud
of himself, said, “I found it!” He laughed slightly as he continued hitting the spot that drove
Regulus wild, “Moony would be so proud.”

Regulus who was gasping with pleasure at the moment forced out through gritted teeth, “Please do
not mention your friends with your fingers in my arse.”

“I won't, I promise. Do you think you feel ready for me?”

Regulus was a bit surprised by the question, but yes he did think he was ready to take James, “Oui,
putain Jamie.”

James groaned loudly, “You know what that does to me. Is that a yes?”
“Yes.”

Almost as soon as the words left his mouth Regulus was flipped back onto his back and he was
looking into the eyes of James Potter once more, “You drive me fucking crazy Reg. I was right you
look fucking phenomenal in red.”

Regulus blushed at the compliment and noticed that at some point James must have shed his own
trousers and pants. He was now naked in front of Regulus and was without a doubt rock hard.
Regulus watched as James struggled to slip some kind of thin sleeve on himself, “What the hell is
that?”

James looked up and blushed slightly as he noticed Regulus watching his struggle, “Uh, it's called
a condom. It's a muggle invention that prevents my uh… from going into you. It's supposed to
prevent diseases.”

Regulus tilted his head slightly assessing the instrument, “Oh. Does it hurt?”

“No it's just tight but I think it's better to be safe than sorry, don't you think?”

Regulus nodded, still a bit perplexed, “Yeah sure. Do you have any diseases?”

James turned bright red now, “Oh god no, but Moo- I mean I was encouraged to use one for both of
our safety.”

Regulus nodded and watched as James used some of the lube on the muggle device. Once he was
properly ready he bent down to kiss Regulus. This kiss was slower than their others had been, with
distinctly more meaning. It was the start of the very intimate act they were about to perform
together and Regulus wasn't sure things would ever be the same.

James kissed him slowly as he pressed into Regulus. The pressure was distinctly more insistent
than it had been with James’s fingers. Regulus’s pain on the entry was swallowed by James’s lips.
The distraction of the kiss was working wonders for Regulus as James slowly entered him. He did
so little by little, making sure to let Regulus adjust before continuing.
While it was painful, Regulus knew it could've been so much worse if James had not taken the time
to prepare him which he was grateful for. It felt like forever before James was fully inside and
Regulus felt distinctly full, but not quite as in pain as before. Once he felt he was good to have
James move he spoke, “Well are you going to move or did you just plan on hanging out in my arse
all day?”

James smiled against Regulus’s neck and slowly pulled back before sliding in again, slow but deep,
“I would if you let me. Sounds like a wonderful way to spend a day.”

“Why don't we see how you do this the first time and then we'll talk about repeat performances.”

James leaned up and looked Regulus in the eyes, almost affectionately, “Now that sounds like a
challenge.”

“Maybe it is.”

James smiled before increasing his speed a bit and changing the angle of his hips. Regulus barely
had time to realize that James was looking for the magic spot before the boy had hit it again.
Instantly he felt pure bliss. The uncomfortable and full feeling was gone and left behind was the
feeling of pleasure. It was so much more intense than it had been when it was just James’s fingers.

Regulus moaned and panted, but he couldn’t even bring himself to act less sex-crazed, he was too
busy enjoying himself. The moment was truly beautiful. A beautiful room with a beautiful bed,
utter bliss, and the absolute big-headed arse that was James Potter. Regulus wouldn't have wanted it
any other way.

The two of them were lost in their pleasure moaning and leaning in for kisses every once in a
while. Regulus had just pulled back from one of James’s kisses when he began speaking French,
even though he really had intended to say it in English, “Jamie. Plus for Jamie. S’il te plaît. Juste là.
Putain.”

James groaned and thrust a little harder, even though Regulus was sure he had no idea what
Regulus had actually said, “You have no idea what you do to me Reg. You are practically fucking
made for me. Fucking, all mine.”

Regulus was ashamed to say that he found those words ridiculously hot even though he was his
own man and really shouldn't be okay with another man claiming him as his own. But this was
James Potter and Regulus didn't care.

The two joined in another tumultuous kiss and Regulus could feel himself climbing steadily closer
to his release. He reached down and grasped his own cock, steadily pumping it while he,
embarrassedly, called out, “Oui! Oui! Oui James!”

He found his release shortly after he had taken his pleasure into his own hands and James thrust a
few more times before finding his own. He collapsed on Regulus and the two lay there panting.
Regulus got his breath back a little quicker and found himself absentmindedly stroking James’s
hair. When James finally found the willpower to move he rolled off Regulus, pulling off the
muggle contraption, tying it off, and depositing it into a rubbish bin that had not been there before.

The two sat in silence for a bit before James spoke, “Fuck that was…..”

Regulus looked at James from his place lying on the bed next to him, “I know.”

James turned on his side to look at Regulus, “I mean, Merlin that was not like it was with those
muggle girls.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, trying and failing to contain his smile, “Well I am glad I was better than
those random muggle girls you met.”

James grinned at him, “Oh Reggie, I can't even begin to compare them to you. It's not fair to them.”

Regulus blushed, but for once he didn't feel like hiding it or concealing his emotions, “You are
such an idiot James.”

“Hey, I can’t help it that you’re so pretty I go stupid around you.”

Regulus laughed at James’s shameless flirting. I mean who flirts with someone after they’ve just
fucked them?

“What's your excuse for the time you don't spend with me then?”
“I spend it thinking about you.”

Regulus couldn't think of a witty comeback so instead, he just stared into the hazel eyes in front of
him. Regulus swears he could get lost in the swirl of colors and the intensity of James’s gaze. He
soon moved onto looking at the rest of James's face, something he never really got a chance to do.
He examined every freckle and every strand of hair. He studied the curve of James’s jaw. He spent
a long time doing this before he realized James was doing the same thing.

Regulus met James’s eyes again and something passed between them, unspoken. The next thing
Regulus knew, James was pulling him closer and embracing him. Regulus suddenly felt warm and
safe. He knew he shouldn't let himself sink into this moment and the feelings it created but he
couldn't help himself, he had been unhappy for so long.

“Are you snuggling me, James?”

James kissed Regulus's head lightly before responding, “Yes, now stop thinking so much and
enjoy the moment.”

Regulus could never understand how James knew him so well. Scratch that, he understood Regulus
to a tee. It both scared him and made him feel alive. They sat there for a few minutes before
Regulus broke the silence, his voice sounded muffled against James’s shoulder, “This is so stupid.”

“What’s stupid?”

“This. The way this makes me feel.”

James didn't speak for a minute, before slowly asking, “How does this make you feel?”

Regulus groaned not knowing why he brought it up, but damn he was feeling way too comfortable
right now to control his thoughts. He usually had such a tight lid on his emotions, he needed to
have that in his house. He wasn’t sure if it was the warm bed, the afterglow of sex, or the feeling of
James’s arms around him that made him want to be honest with James. “I feel safe. Stupidly safe.”

James’s arms tightened around him, “Good. I want you to feel safe with me.”
Regulus smiled to himself, even though he knew it was foolish. He didn't even want to know what
his mother would say if she knew what he was doing right now, “Mon nounours.”

“What does that mean?”

Regulus ignored him, not particularly wanting to reveal to James that he had just called him his
teddy bear, though to be fair it described the boy perfectly. James was both snuggly and warm, just
like a teddy bear was. Though Regulus would never actually call him that to his face if he could
speak French.

He hoped James would drop it, “Fine if you want to be like that then I won't tell you what my
friends call you.”

Regulus pulled back slightly to look at James, “What do you mean? Like they call me something?
Or they call the guy you're messing around with something?”

James smirked down at him, “No they call the guy I am messing around with, something. Which is
you, in case you forgot, not that they know that.”

Regulus felt his curiosity grow and he glared at James, “Tell me.”

“No, not until you tell me what you said earlier.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, James had no idea how to be manipulative. It was actually sort of cute that
he was trying, the Gryffindor that he was. Regulus leaned forward and placed a kiss on James’s
cheekbone, his pulse point, and just above his collarbone where he sucked slightly. He licked the
spot and looked back up at James, who had his eyes glazed over, “Je te laisserai me baiser encore
si tu me dis.”

James was panting slightly as he looked at Regulus’s mouth, “What does that mean?”

Regulus smirked, “I'll tell you what I just said if you tell me what your little friends call me.”
James suddenly looked more alert and he glared at Regulus, “God I forgot I was dealing with a
Slytherin.”

Regulus laughed, “Yeah, that serves you right for trying to beat a Slytherin at our own game.”

“Okay, so what does it mean then? I'll tell you after you tell me yours.”

“Well since I know that you are an incredibly honorable Gryffindor who would never go back on
his word I will tell you. I said that if you told me, then I’d let you fuck me again.”

James gaped, looking a bit ridiculous, “Wha- right now?”

Regulus shifted his legs to see if he felt any less sore than he did right after. Maybe a little less, but
now enough to want another round tonight, “No I don't think I'd be able to handle another round
tonight. Even though you were gentle I think I am still going to be sore for a few days, but when I
feel better then definitely.”

James’s face turned to concern, “Are you in pain? Did I hurt you?”

“No not anymore then is natural when someone shoves something thick up your arse. I am just
sore, it's fine Jamie.”

James smiled at him, “I like when you call me Jamie.”

“Don’t think you are going to get out of your end of the deal by distracting me. What do your
friends call me?”

James laughed loudly as if even thinking of the nickname was amusing to him, “All right so they
call you…Bunny.”

Regulus’s face downturned almost immediately. Bunny? As in a fucking bunny rabbit? What the
actual fuck?
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Now James was laughing full-heartedly and Regulus pulled himself out of James’s embrace glaring
at the man, “James please tell me you are joking.”

James was finally starting to get control of his laughter but he was still laughing a bit when he
answered, “No and the best part is that your brother is the one who thought of it.”

Regulus’s cheeks flared in humiliation and anger. Even when Sirius didn’t know it was him, he
still found a way to embarrass him beyond the point of return, “Why the fuck do they even need a
name for me?”

“Well they don’t know your real name, so when I talk about you how would they know who I was
talking about?”

Regulus was a bit shocked, “Yo-you talk about me? To your friends?”

Jamie blushed a bit, which Regulus found cute, way more preferable than when he was a blushing
fool, “Well yeah obviously Reg.”

“But why? What could you possibly be talking to them about, that wouldn’t give away who I
was?”

James smirked at Regulus and that was answer enough for Regulus, “What the fuck James. Please
tell me you do not talk about the shit we do together to your friends!” James started laughing when
Regulus started slapping his arm, “Are you kidding me? You tell my brother about the stuff we do
together?”

James rolled his eyes but didn’t seem to be bothered by the slapping, “No Reg. Do you really think
I would do that to him or you?”

That made Regulus stop and calm down because no James wouldn't do that to his best friend….or
Regulus, “Then why did you start laughing?”
“I started laughing because you made a wild accusation and assumed you were right, and that is the
exact same thing your brother does.” Regulus’s face flamed at being compared to his drama queen
of a brother, “I don’t tell them about the things we do. I just occasionally mention things you like to
do or are good at in front of them.”

“Like what?”

“Well, I told them that you speak French, that you are very smart, and I think I mentioned that you
play the piano really well to them as well.”

“You haven’t ever even heard me play the piano, dumbass.”

James grinned at him, “I know but considering you excel at everything else I just know you’re
good. Besides, Sirius once told me you played the piano really well.”

Regulus’s face grimaced at the completely bullshit compliment, “Yeah right.”

James smiled at him before a thought crossed over his face and the smile faltered for a second,
“Uh actually I guess I lied to you earlier.”

“About what?”

James scratched the back of his neck, “Well I might’ve actually told one of them a bit more, but it
wasn’t Sirius I promise.”

Regulus’s eyes widened in surprise. He should at least feel relieved that James didn’t talk to Sirius
about him because that was just mortifying. He didn’t really love the idea of anyone knowing their
personal business, even if they didn’t know who he was, “Explain please.”

“Okay so you know how we just had some really good sex.” James waited for Regulus’s nod
before he continued, “I might have asked Moo- I mean Remus about how one should be intimate
with a man for the first time. So while he didn’t get actual details about what we’ve done, he gave
me the details to perform what we did.”
Regulus was now officially mortified. Jesus the fucking wolf, knew that James had thoroughly
fingered him before he fucked him. This was fucking humiliating.

“Fuck, James did you really have to bring him into this?”

“I’m sorry Reg but I just wanted to make sure it was actually good for you.”

“You couldn’t have tried books?”

“I did read some books but they were either extremely unhelpful or terrifying. I promise he has no
idea it’s you though.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’s attempt to be comforting, “I know he doesn’t, but the idea of
someone else knowing about what we just did, the very intimate act we just did, makes me a little
uncomfortable.”

James turned fully towards Regulus lying on his side now, Regulus mirrored him and the two
looked at each other for a moment before James spoke again, “Of course it does and I am sorry that
I didn’t ask you before asking him for his advice. I won’t tell any of my friends any intimate details
about us again. I promise.”

Regulus pouted at James a bit, “You promise?”

James smiled at him and nodded before reaching out his pinky and holding it out in front of
Regulus. Regulus had no idea what James was doing until he said, “Pinky promise.” Which
honestly confused him even more.

“What are you talking about?”

James chuckled a bit before grabbing Regulus’s hand and manually sticking up his pinky before
linking his own with Regulus’s, “This is a pinky promise. It’s a muggle thing that they do when
they are promising something. Supposedly it means you can’t break your promise.”

Oh, a muggle tradition. It made no bloody sense to Regulus, because why would swearing on
pinkies make anyone keep their promise. “It doesn’t really make a whole lot of sense does it?”

James laughed and teasingly spoke, “Shut up, it’s a nice idea. And it means that I am swearing that
I won’t break our promise.

Regulus laughed, “Well I appreciate that, thank you.”

Neither of them said anything next so Regulus just soaked in the silence and serenity of the
moment. Their pinkies were still connected until James intertwined their fingers instead. Now they
were lying in a big and beautiful bed holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes. The
moment was ridiculously intimate.

Regulus stared at their entwined fingers for what seemed like a long time, thinking. Thinking about
how James made him feel and how it was so different than how he had ever felt around anyone
else. How he could never really stay mad at James no matter how stupid he got. He thought about
the way James complimented him and genuinely made Regulus feel better about himself. He found
himself longing to talk to James, to let him in. To be vulnerable with another human in the way he
hadn't been with anyone since his brother and he were kids. He didn't know where this feeling was
coming from but he knew it was a dangerous feeling. Somehow he couldn't find it in himself to
care, not when he felt so safe.

“Sometimes I can't believe what we are doing here. I think about how it's bound to turn out
disastrous and that I will definitely get hurt. I think about what my brother would say or even my
parents, if they knew. I think about the fact that I could lose everything and I think to myself why
risk it? What could possibly be worth risking something like that? And the truth is I am not sure if
it is worth it but I do know that no one makes me feel the way you do. I have never really felt safe
and cared for in my life but around you, I feel like I don't have to always be on guard. You have no
idea what it's like to let your guard down for the first time in six years. I don't really know why I
am telling you all of this, I just wanted you to know.”

Regulus had been looking at the entwined hands as he spoke but after he finished he glanced up
into James’s eyes. He found a warmth there that he certainly had not expected. It almost seemed
like a protective glint as he looked at Regulus.

James took a minute, thinking about everything he had just heard before responding, “I know you
could lose a lot if someone were to find out about us, but if you are wondering if it's worth the risk
then you have to know, that it is. I am not really sure what this is either but I know that I feel the
same way you do, but I also feel like I want to wrap you in my arms and protect you from the
world. The idea of someone hurting you makes me burn inside and I honestly worry about what
that means.”
“What do you mean?”

“I mean that we have only been doing this for a couple of months, but I feel extremely protective
over you. I mean we don’t even call this a relationship yet, but I think if I saw you with someone
else I would go feral. Can you imagine what it’s going to be like when we’ve been together for
years? Hell, I might be positively dangerous.”

Regulus gaped a bit at James, “Years? You want to be doing this for years?”

“No,” Regulus’s chest clenched at the denial. He couldn’t believe he had been stupid enough to
think that James actually wanted to be with him for a long period of time. James continued when he
saw the look on Regulus’s face, “No, Reg I don’t want to be fooling around for years. I want to be
in a relationship, I want to be dating, and I want to be your boyfriend.”

Regulus couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Had James Potter seriously just said he wanted to be
his boyfriend. Fuck that was a terrible idea. What was James thinking? It was one thing hiding that
they were fooling around but how would they hide them dating. Dating included going on dates,
buying gifts, or even just being generally romantic. Regulus didn’t think either of them really had
the willpower to handle doing that in secret.

“You are joking.”

“No, I am not. Listen I am not going to make you decide right now because I can practically see the
wheels turning in your head telling you all the reasons this is a terrible idea. I want you to take
some time to think about what you want Regulus. Not what anyone else wants or what you think
people would expect of you. I want to know if you could picture yourself in a relationship with
me.”

Regulus could picture it. Embarrassingly well, in fact, he could see them holding hands and
snogging in the middle of the corridor, not worrying about who sees them. He could imagine
James and him laughing freely on the quidditch pitch as their rival teams faced off. He could
imagine being with James almost too well and it made him realize that he had been wanting to date
James as well. Subconsciously his mind had created images of what their relationship would be like
if it were to ever happen. It was still an impossibility but they were there.

“Okay I will think about it, but please don’t get your hopes up.”
 James grinned deviously at him, “I won’t. In the meantime, I think I should take you on our first
date, so you can see how good it’d be.”

Regulus gaped at him, “What?”

“A date. Where we eat food and laugh. We would get to know each other better with our clothes
on, I think it’s a wonderful idea.”

“And where would this hypothetical date take place?”

“At Hogsmeade, in the Three Broomsticks. We would sneak there after dark on a non-Hogsmeade
weekend, so we wouldn’t run into anyone.”

“How would we even sneak there?”

James smirked at him and threw him a wink, “Why don’t you let me worry about that.”

Regulus decided to throw his doubts to the wind and agreed, “Alright let’s do it.”

James leaned in and kissed him lightly, “Perfect.”

Chapter End Notes

French Translations (Or at least what I am trying to say)

Jamie. Plus dur Jamie. S’il vous plaît. Juste là. Baiser= Jamie. Harder Jamie. Please
right there. Fuck.

Oui! Oui! Oui James!= Yes! Yes! Yes James!

Mon nounours= My teddy bear

Je te laisserai me baiser encore si tu me dis= If you tell me I will let you fuck me again
 Peter Knows All

Sirius

Sirius was nervous, extremely nervous. Which was a little ridiculous considering he had never
been nervous on any other date he’d been on, and he had been on quite a few dates. He wasn’t sure
if this one was different because it was his first date with a man or if it was because it was his first
date with Remus.

Sirius had never really felt that there were stakes to his dating. If he went on a date with someone
and hated it, it wouldn’t be that hard to end the relationship before it really began. Even with
Marlene, he knew that they would be able to get through the awkwardness for the sake of their
friendship if it did ended badly, which they had. This time, though, there were definite stakes to
this date.

This date was with Remus bloody Lupin, his best friend. If this date ended bad Sirius wasn’t really
sure if either of them would be able to fully recover their friendship. He wasn’t sure about Remus’s
feelings, though he assumed that the boy liked him, he knew that he had high hopes for a
relationship with Remus so it would be difficult to go back to normal if it didn’t work out.

Sirius wasn’t sure exactly when he started looking at his friend differently. He supposed maybe he
always had, a little bit, but he hadn’t realized it until he broke up with Marlene. It was after that
when he started to feel differently. He started looking at his friend, who he had always thought was
objectively attractive, and would find himself thinking about what his lips would feel like on
Sirius’.

He had been spending more and more time with Remus lately and it only made his attraction to his
friend grow. He hadn’t actually thought that he would ever have the gall to kiss the boy but once
James had told him about his own bold action that resulted in a relationship, he felt he could do it
too. He spent weeks pondering the information James had given him, thinking that if he analyzed it
enough maybe he could discover the secret. The secret to having a happy nontoxic relationship,
like James. Then again Sirius really didn’t know anything about James’s relationship, but his friend
seemed happy.

Sirius wished he didn’t feel jealous of his friend, but sometimes he couldn’t help himself. He
wanted to find his person so bad and it seemed like James might have found his own. Sirius was
happy for his friend, after he had spent so much time pining after the same person he deserved
someone who gave him the time of day, but it didn’t stop him from longing for a connection
himself.

When he finally had decided to make him move on Moony, it was anything but spur of the moment
even if it had seemed that way to Remus. He had agonized over it for days before the liquid
courage had sped up the process. While it might not have been done in the same way he imagined,
he had no regrets.

He had done it, he had kissed his best friend and his friend had responded. Then Moony had kissed
him again in the dorm room and Sirius had felt butterflies, actual butterflies. He had never felt that
way kissing anyone. Then Remus had felt it pertinent to avoid him like the plague, which Sirius
thought was a little unfair considering he was torturing himself in his head wondering what the boy
was thinking.

When he had finally managed to track down Remus and actually ask him on this date he had been
mulling over what he was going to say for days, Remus did not make it easy. Sirius was happy he
had finally managed to convince him and he was even happier about their kiss. It was so much
better when they were both sober and Moony was an excellent kisser. Sirius had noticed that
Remus sort of liked to take charge during their kisses, which was something he had never
experienced before but he found himself enjoying it immensely.

Now though, he was sort of regretting asking Remus on a date this soon, as he had absolutely
nothing to wear on a first date with his best friend turned…..lover? Oooh no he didn't like that
word at all, but he sort of hoped that this date would give them a better idea on whether this was
actually going to work between them.

Sirius had plenty of clothes, according to both James and Remus, he had too many clothes but right
now as he was staring into his closet he couldn't believe their naivety.

“I have absolutely nothing to wear!” Sirius yelled as he once again pawed through his entire closet
as if he would find something perfect hiding between his subpar shirts.

James snorted from where he was combing his hair in front of the mirror, or at least he was
attempting to comb it. His hair was quite literally never neat no matter what he tried to do, in fact,
Sirius was under the impression that James had completely given up trying to tame it.

“You have three times the amount of clothes I have, Pads. There is no way there is nothing in there
you cant wear.”

“But there isn't! I swear I have looked a million times, I might as well go naked for all this is
worth.”
James turned and smirked at him, “Oh I bet your date would love that.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. He hadn't told James that he was going on a date but he was sure James had
pieced it together from his wardrobe emergency, “I am not going on a date, James. But I figure that
I might as well look good in case I see a bird I like.”

Sirius hated lying to James, but Remus and he were not ready to tell anyone, even though Sirius
was sure the boy would be over the moon for them. They hadn't even gone on their first date and
Sirius wanted to make sure that they had a future before bringing others into it.

James laughed, probably at Sirius’s playboy ways, “That's a lot of pressure to put on an outfit, no
wonder you can't find one.”

Sirius threw the trousers in his hand at James, hitting him square on the head, “Hey!” James
quickly tried to undo the damage the pants had caused, “It took me forever to get it that way.”

Sirius snorted, “It still looked messy, what do you care? Aren't you the one who told us that you
would never waste an hour in front of the mirror on your hair?”

James groaned and threw his hand up in frustration at not being able to tame his wild locks, “Fuck
this.”

Sirius turned back to this closet laughing, figuring that James had decided to give up on his hair
like he always did until he heard James open the drawer. He turned around, curious at what James
was grabbing, and was shocked to see him grab Fleamont Potter’s magical extra strength hair
tamer. His dad might have invented it but James absolutely despised putting that stuff in his hair, he
always said it was too heavy.

It was when he watched James lather some into his hair, combing it through the messy hair that
Sirius finally pulled himself away from his own wardrobe emergency to fully look at his best
friend. His friend looked…nice. Not that Prongs wasn't always a handsome lad, but he had clearly
made an effort today. He was wearing a blue button-up shirt and a pair of black trousers, both
looking freshly cleaned. He had even made sure to match his belt and his shoes, the band of his
family watch happened to match as well.

As Sirius watched James tame his hair, he realized something, “You love him.”

James froze before turning slowly to Sirius, scoffing, “I do not love him.”
Sirius didn't believe him. James had never been a very good liar and Sirius saw right through his
little nonchalance act. James was or at least was dangerously close to falling head over heels for
Bunny, “You do.”

James stopped fussing over his hair to turn to glare at his friend, “I don't love him, but yeah I like
him a lot, okay?”

Sirius shook his head, disbelieving that he hadn't noticed how deep his best friend was in his
relationship, “It's more than that. You dressed up, and you are using that goop in your hair which I
know you despise, all for your date with him. You've never done that with anyone else.”

James flushed, looking down at his outfit before looking back up at Sirius, “We are going on our
first official date, I think he deserves for me to give a little effort. Don't you think so?”

Sirius was surprised that James felt that way. Not that James wasn't a romantic at heart, but his
friend had never shown such a desire to look well-groomed for anyone, especially not someone that
clearly already likes James for who he was. Sirius doubted James really needed to try and impress
Bunny with his appearance because apparently, given the hickeys that almost always littered his
friend's neck, his boyfriend liked his appearance just fine.

“Oh.”

James turned and raised his eyebrow at Sirius, “What, you don't agree?”

Sirius shook his head, “No it's not that, I mean I don't even know the kid, how should I know what
he deserves. It's just odd seeing you so attentive to your appearance that's all.”

James smiles at Sirius and abandons his taming for the moment as he walks over to Sirius’s closet
and looks inside. He pulled out a dark gray long sleeve and Sirus’s leather jacket James had given
him last Christmas, “Pair this with your black jeans and I think any bird would swoon for you
Pads.”

Sirius glanced at the outfit, not quite believing that James would've seen anything in Sirius’s closet
that he hadn't. He was surprised to find that the outfit was perfect, absolutely the look he was
trying to go for on his first date with moony. Casual but nice enough to show him this definitely
was a date.
Sirius grinned at James and ruffled his hair, “Thanks, Jamie.”

James grumbled out some obscenities as he walked over to fix the damage Sirius had once again
done to his hair.’

******************************************************************************************

Sirius

Remus looked nice, although Sirius knew that the boy had not put in nearly the amount of effort
Sirius had. In fact, Remus had come up from studying only a half-hour before their date to get
ready, while he had been preparing for hours.

The two of them were walking through the pathway to Honeydukes a little after suppertime. They
had decided to skip getting dinner on their date and settle for drinks. They were going to the Hogs
Head Inn as it was the best place to drink underage.

The conversation between them flowed decently but Sirius could tell that they both were not sure if
they should be talking like friends or how they each would on a first date. They already knew each
other very well so they didn't have to worry about the awkward twenty-question game couples
usually had to play at the beginning of a relationship. Still, though it didn't feel right to talk about
anything they usually would if they were hanging out with friends.

“You know Peter told me that he told Magdalene he loved her.” Remus brought up, sort of out of
the blue, knocking Sirius back from his thoughts.

“Really? Before her? I don't know why I never imagined him having the balls to say it first.”

Remus rolled his eyes, “That's because you still think of Peter as he was in his first year. Meek.”

Sirius didn't think that was true. Sure out of all of their friends he knew that Peter was the shyest
and generally most afraid of consequences, but he knew his friend was overall brave. To be fair
that might not have been clear to everyone as he did give Peter the most crap out of the Marauders.
It was hard not to because Pete was generally such a good sport about it. James was his best friend
and usually his partner in crime when it came to teasing and Remus, he could hardly think of
anything to make fun of Remus for, the boy was perfect.
He shook his head before responding, partially to shake thoughts of Remus’s perfection out and
partially to answer Remus, “I really don't. I love Pete, you know that. I know he's not as meek or
afraid of everything as he used to be but yeah maybe I still imagine that he's naive and oblivious
like he used to be.”

Remus looked at him and nodded his understanding as they were reaching the cellar door, as they
were climbing into the cellar he spoke, “I know what you mean. It's so weird watching us all grow
into adults and leaving behind certain issues we have always had. Peter with his naivety, you and
your selfishness, well mostly leaving it behind–.”

Sirius shoved Remus lightly on the shoulder interrupting him, “Hey I am a lot less selfish than I
used to be, give me props for that.”

Remus chuckled, clearly amused at Sirius’s so-called adult behavior, as they left Honeydukes, “I
was giving you props before you interrupted.”

“Oh right well, I was going to say that you're getting a lot better at managing your self-esteem.”

Remus went silent and Sirius could practically hear the cogs in his head turning before he slowly
spoke, enunciating his words carefully, “I am not sure I am completely over that, especially when
you look like that.”

Sirius whipped his head to Remus, nearly giving himself whiplash because is Moony Serious?
While he enjoyed a compliment as well as the next guy, he refused to let his best friend to ever
think he looked inferior to him. Especially when he looks as good as he does.

His response was short and clipped in anger, “Well you should be over it.”

Remus shrugged and looked down at the ground as they walked as if he was beating himself up
inside. This just wouldn't do.

When they were right in front of the Hogs Head, he pulled Remus to a stop and made him face
him, looking into his amber eyes, “Listen to me Remus Lupin, you are the last person that should
ever feel insecure. You are not only incredible to look at, you are so funny and so smart it makes
the rest of us look subpar. Don't put yourself down.”
Remus didn't say anything, but his cheeks were turning red as he stared into Sirius’s eyes and Sirius
was sure he was doing the same thing. While he didn't regret a single thing he said, he knew it
probably wouldn't help with the awkwardness of their first date.

Remus lunged forward rather suddenly and Sirius’s back collided with the door of the bar as
Remus’s lips pressed against his. The kiss was so full of longing that Sirius felt as if his heart was
going to burst out of love for his friend.

Almost as quick as the kiss had started, it ended. Mainly because the waitress had shoved open the
door, pushing them to the side and fixed them with a withering stare, “So are you planning on
coming in, or are you looking for a room upstairs?”

Sirius felt his face burn at the insinuation, nobody was supposed to really know that they were on a
date. They were supposed to be subtle, not that it really mattered if a random waitress knew they
were dating, but it was the principal of the matter.

“Uh sorry yeah, we are here for a couple drinks.”

She fixed them with another glare, which had Sirius shivering slightly from the chill of it, “Just
don't start snogging on my tables, if you're going to do that, then you take it upstairs.”

“I promise that w–.” Remus began assuring the waitress that the boys had no intention of snogging
in the inn but the waitress promptly walked away.

The two boys shared a look and then walked in, following the waitress to an empty table and
ordering a couple of fire whiskeys.

It was officially awkward again as the two boys waited for their drinks. Sirius wasn't sure if it was
because of what he had said to Remus out there, or the kiss, or even the waitress’s constant urge to
bring up them moving upstairs to do more, but it was so awkward.

Sirius spent a bit of that waiting looking around the bar, it was pretty dead, except for a man in the
corner that looked like he might be passed out and a booth that had food and drinks on it but no
customers. Sirius wondered if the customers were on a date and had just left. Both plates appeared
to be on the same side of the table which screamed date to Sirius, but honestly who brought a date
here for supper? To be fair he and Remus were on a date as well but they were just getting drinks
here because they were too young to get served most places, he wouldn't actually bring Remus to
eat here.

Sirius was pulled out of his thoughts when the drinks were brought to the table and the waitress
fixed them with another unimpressed look. When she left Remus took a sip of his drink, “Merlin
that woman is unpleasant.”

Sirius was glad Moony had broken the ice because he felt a weight off his chest as he laughed,
“She just thinks we are going to fuck here on this table and she doesn't want to clean it up.”

Remus laughed as well before responding a little more flirtatiously than Sirius expected, “Well she
has nothing to worry about there because I would never do that here. A bear-skinned rug in front of
a fireplace, maybe, but not here.”

Sirius looked at him with wide eyes before realizing his friend was joking and burst out in laughter.
That was when he noticed something moving over by the booth that he had been looking at before
and was shocked to see money appear on the table out of nowhere, “Did you see that?”

Remus looked over at the booth too, “What?”

“A minute ago there was no money on that table and I just watched it appear out of thin air.”

Remus rolled his eyes, “Well we are wizards, aren't we?”

Sirius shook his head not taking his eyes off the table, “But there's not exactly a spell for that.”

“Sirius I am pretty sure that that money has been sitting there since we got here. It didn't just
appear.”

Sirius groaned, “I swear that it did.”

Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius’s insistence, “Fine maybe it did, but is it really worth talking about
all night?”
No, he supposed it wasn't. Especially when he really wanted to see more of the flirtatious Remus
he had seen moments before, “So you mentioned a bear skin rug?”

Remus grinned wickedly.

***************************************************************************************

Regulus

“I have absolutely nothing that isn't horrid in this closet!” Regulus yelled in frustration, plopping
back on the bed angrily.

Barty, who was the only one in the room with Regulus, laughed at his frustration in a way that
made him want to wring his neck, “Yes, you have nothing to wear in a closet that is worth more
than most people's houses.”

Regulus turned to glare at his best friend, who was carelessly flipping through a magazine while he
was having a complete wardrobe crisis. Regulus grabbed his pillow and chucked it at Barty,
knocking the magazine from his hand, “Well that wasn't very proper of you, Mr. Prefect.”

Regulus groaned at his friend's sarcasm, which he usually appreciated, but now was not the time,
“Help me, you prick.”

Barty rolled his eyes but slowly raised himself off his bed and walked over to Regulus’s closet
examining the clothes before him, “Where are you going?”

Regulus’s eyes widened, “Why are you asking me that?”

Barty looked back at him and said in a very condescending tone, “As much as I would just love to
help you Regs, I can't really do that if I have no idea what you are dressing for.”

“Well, that doesn't mean you need to know where I am going.”

“It doesn't?”

“No, all you need to know is that I want to dress nice.”

Barty raised his eyebrows, “You want to look nice? Okay for what? Like family dinner nice or
party nice?”

Regulus thought it over before replying, sounding sort of unsure of himself, “Maybe a mix of
both?”

Barty turned fully around and smirked at Regulus before leaning against the wall next to the closet
folding his arms over his chest, looking ridiculously smug, “So you have a date then? That explains
why you're being so neurotic.”

Regulus sputtered, “Neurotic? I am not Nero- Hey I never said I was going on a date.”

Barty’s smirk grew even wider if at all possible, “It's pretty obvious now that I think about it
actually. I mean you have been sneaking off with someone for at least a month and now here you
are agonizing over what to wear when you go out once again.”

“I–I have not been sneaking out with anyone and I am not going on a date. I just have social
engagement that it would serve my best interest to look nice.”

Barty snorted, “Yeah it serves your best interest so that you can get laid tonight, you mean?”

Regulus’s face flushed a deep red, “Shut the fuck up, Barty.”

He let out a laugh and leaned back from the wall turning to the closet and began looking through
the clothes again, “Don't worry Regs. I am not going to force you to tell me the details of your
scandalous affair, mostly because I don't care enough beyond faint curiosity, but also because you
clearly want no one to know.”

Regulus felt himself calming down slightly, “Uh thanks, Barty.”

Barty flashed a smile at him, “You are my best mate Regs it's no problem. But you should know
that eventually, someone is going to find out about whatever it is that you have going on.”

Regulus felt his heart start to beat faster once more, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, you know just that things always have a way of coming out eventually.”

Regulus was silent unbelieving that Barty was warning him, while not even realizing exactly how
dangerous his situation was. Barty spoke once more, sounding satisfied, “Ooh I think I found your
outfit.”

******************************************************************************************

James

James couldn't stop staring at Regulus. He seriously couldn't, no matter what he tried his eyes
always went back to his face. His beautiful and flawless face. His silky black hair was as always
perfectly styled. His black button-down was unbuttoned enough to reveal his colorbones. His black
bell-bottoms hugged his arse to perfection. Regulus Black was so sexy.

The two were walking through the passage to Honeydukes, where they had gone many times
together, on their way to the Hogs Head Inn. It wasn't the most romantic place for a date but the
food was good and it was private.

Regulus turned his head towards James as they walked, smirking at him, “You know if you keep
staring at me like that you're going to trip and hurt yourself.”

“It'd totally be worth it.”

Regulus blushed and bumped James’s shoulder with his own, “You are such an idiot.”

“I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you to tell me that every day.”
Regulus smiled at him, “You would perish by your own ego, I'm sure.”

James threw back his head in laughter and slung his arm around Regulus’s shoulder, pulling him
close, “Well then it's a good thing I have you then.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’s cheesiness but a small his lips upturned slightly, probably
unconsciously, so James knew Regulus enjoyed being close to him. James spoke again, “You look
so bloody beautiful.”

Regulus turned his head slightly and smirked at James, “You've already told me that tonight,
twice.”

James knew very well that he was being repetitive with that thought but he couldn't help himself.
He had already thought about how beautiful Regulus looked tonight fifteen times in the short time
they had been together since James picked him up outside of the Slytherin common room, so he
thought that only saying it three times was pretty impressive. Ever since Regulus had stepped out
of the common room and James, who was under his invisibility cloak, had laid eyes on him, he
couldn't stop his heart from pounding in his chest and he couldn't draw his eyes away for more
than a few moments.

Regulus Black was always gorgeous. He had flawless skin and luscious hair. Tonight, however, he
looked even more incredible. James wasn't sure if its because he had gotten used to seeing Reg in
dark closets or in the light post-sex when his hair was messy and his skin marked. Not that he
didn't look amazing that way, but this was different. It was very clear that Regulus had tried to look
good for their date, not that James could judge him seeing as he tried pretty hard himself.
Regulus’s hair seemed to be styled a little differently than he usually wore and his skin was
practically glowing. He wore a pair of black trousers and a black button-up, with a gold necklace
and watch accenting the outfit. His usual rings were switched out for gold to fit into his color
scheme. He looked incredible.

James grinned at Reg, “I can't help myself.”

Regulus rolled his eyes once again but leaned slightly closer to James as they neared the
Honeydukes cellar door. James leaned in to see if he could hear anyone in the cellar, as it was a bit
earlier than they usually would come down here. He didn't hear anything so he opened the door
and stepped through, then he took Regulus’s hand and helped him through the door as there was a
bit of a lift to get inside.

“We haven't been here in a while.”

James looked at Regulus who was looking around the room like he usually did when we came
here, always so amazed by the amount of candy the place held, “Yeah we really haven't. We
should come here again soon, but not tonight. Tonight we have our date.”

Regulus flushed a bit at the mention of the date, which James thought was a little silly considering
that they were already on their date so really James mentioning that fact shouldn't make him
nervous.

Regulus nodded and then the two started their way out of the cellar and to the Hogs Head Inn.
When they stepped inside, James was pleasantly surprised to see the place fairly empty. He turned
to look at Regulus and couldn't help laughing at the disgusted grimace on his face as looked at the
old bar area. James figured he had probably looked that way the first time he had come here too but
he's very used to it by now.

“Not exactly a fancy restaurant, is it?”

Regulus looked at him and James could hear a bit of whining in his voice as he asked, “Can't we go
to the Three Broomsticks instead? This place is disgusting.”

James smiled at him and then leaned in to place a kiss on his lips. Regulus sunk into the kiss for a
moment before realizing they were in public and pushed James away quickly before his eyes
frantically searched the room for onlookers. He found none and when he looked back at James the
boy was smirking, “That's why we are having our date here. There's practically no one here and
even if there was, nobody cares about anyone's business here. The Three Broomsticks is definitely
the opposite, so as much as I'd love to take you to a nice place for our date this is the best bet if
you want to remain discreet.”

Regulus who was finally realizing that nobody truly cared that two boys just kissed in the middle
of their doorway nodded. James waved down the waitress on duty for the night and she had them
sit in a booth in the corner, which suited James just fine. They ordered the food they wanted and a
couple of butterbeers.

While they were waiting for their food James and Regulus began talking about Slytherins
upcoming quidditch match against Ravenclaw, “Come on Reg. While you're obviously the best
player, the rest of your team is subpar.”

Regulus looked absolutely indignant, “Saxton is a damn good keeper, James. She just doesn't get
the credit she deserves because of all of the penalty shots we give away.”

“Lizzie Saxton? Please she has nothing on Dorcas Meadowes.”

“You are just saying that because you are friends with Meadows!”

James rolled his eyes and laughed at Regulus’s competitiveness, “No I am saying that because she
is better. Saxton is alright but her starfish and stick is sloppy at best.”

Regulus groaned, “Ugh not everything is about specific moves, James. She is way better at
defending the lower posts than any other keeper in the school.”

“So what about her upper post then?” James watched Regulus fumble for an excuse and, “That's
what I thought. Listen Reg you don't have to try and convince me of the talent level of your
teammates. The only way you guys are going to win is if you take control and catch the snitch
before your team has a chance to fuck up.”

Regulus paused his grumbling as the waitress brought their food but as soon as she was gone he
spoke, “That's very presumptuous of you to say, Potter. Especially considering you haven't taken
the talent level of any other Ravenclaw into hand other than your friend.”

James, who had gotten fish and chips, grabbed a chip and pointed it at Regulus as he spoke, “You
are getting way too into this discussion. Let's agree to disagree. I'll be there in the stands cheering
you on either way.”

Regulus’s eyes widened, “You will not.”

James rolled his eyes, amused at Regulus’s neurotic behavior, “Silently, of course.”

“Fine as long as you are silent, then I guess I'd like for you to be there.”

“Oh I was going to be there either way, like you said before, my friend is playing.”
Regulus threw one of his own chips at James as James laughed at the attack, “Speaking of friends,
how is your friendship with Remy going?”

If Regulus was surprised by the change of subject, he didn't show it, “It's great actually. I have such
a different friendship with her than I do with Barty or Evan, it's sort of nice.”

James, holding in his own feelings of Regulus’s other friends, “That's great Reg! So what do you
guys do together?”

“Umm well not much honestly. We mostly meet during my study time, because she's actually a
great person to study with. Otherwise, we just meet and chat about our days.”

“So no more trips to the greenhouse together?”

Regulus laughed, probably at the memory of their visit to the notorious greenhouses, “No it's really
not my thing, I don't think.”

“That's understandable, though I think it probably is Remy's thing.”

Regulus snorted, “Oh yeah it definitely is. I actually just convinced her the other day that she
should officially meet my friends, even though she's seen them at the greenhouses half a dozen
times.”

James was a bit surprised at that, “You want her to meet Crouch and Rosier. Isn't she a half-
blood?”

Regulus’s eyebrows furrowed, “Yeah, why would that matter?”

“Well your friends aren't exactly the most inclusive group, aren't you worried they're going to be
rude to her?”

Regulus’s expression downturned and James regretted bringing it up, “No. They aren't monsters
James, she's a half-blood, not a muggle-born.”
“As if it isn't fucked up that, that makes a difference to your friends.”

Instead of responding in anger as James expected, Regulus looked a bit calmer and more pensive,
“That's exactly what Remy said.”

“Smart girl. Look, I am not going to try to understand your friends because frankly, I don't want to,
but I just want to warn you that you need to be careful. You never know exactly what people's
thoughts are until they are confronted with the thing they despise.”

Regulus nodded but also looked firm in his response, “Trust me, James I know my friends, they'll
be fine with Remy.”

Now it was James’s turn to nod, even though he wasn't sure Regulus was right. He didn't want to
ruin their date night by telling Regulus the real reason for his apprehension when it came to his
friend's meeting. That he saw Rosier and a bunch of other Slytherins hexing a half-blood and
calling her a mudblood, last week.

James felt it was time to change the subject as he watched Regulus picking at his food, “So
Halloween is next week, what are your plans?”

Regulus looked up in surprise, “I was planning on going to the party at the pitch, what about you?”

James smiled at the idea that they were both going to be at a party together, “Yeah me too, but I am
going to be dressing up in a costume, are you?”

Regulus furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “Why would I dress up in a costume?”

James laughed at Regulus’s naivety, “Obviously because it's what the muggles do.”

“What? Why would we dress up as the muggles do?”

“It's more fun, I think. A lot of people do it at this party. I know it's your first year going, but I
think you should do it too.”

The annual Halloween party was a tradition that started ten years prior. It was completely student-
held, usually by the seventh year students and it was on the quidditch pitch, where no teachers
bothered looking for students after the feast. James was telling the truth that a lot of students
dressed up in costumes, like the muggles, did but that usually didn't include the Slytherins. The
party was open to the fifth year and above so this would be Regulus’s first party and James wished
more than anything that he could spend it at his side.

Regulus looked to be thinking it over, “Maybe, but I will have to see what my friends are doing.”

James nodded even though he hated Regulus' friends and the idea that they would decide whether
Regulus got into the spirit of things or not, “Have you ever been to a party before?”

Regulus looked slightly embarrassed to answer, “One in the Slytherin common room after the cup
victory last year. I threw up and passed out in the bathroom, it was a horrifying experience.”

Jame laughed at the idea of the prim and poised Regulus Black, getting so drunk at a party that he
passed out in the loo. Regulus’s face flushed bright red, “Shut up it was not funny.”

James who was practically gasping with laughter, “Yes it is! Were you hugging the toilet seat
too?”

Regulus’s eyes widened and he flushed even darker and that was answer enough for James, “Oh
my god! That's better than I even imagined!”

Jame laughed loudly for longer than he probably should've because, by the time he got control of
himself, Regulus was glaring at him so he tried to make him feel better, “It's okay Reg it happens to
the best of us. I have fallen asleep in this position many times. A couple weeks ago I fell asleep
after a party in our common room and threw up all over the antique rug that's in there and my
friends had to take care of me.”

Regulus smirked slightly, like he found the idea of that amusing, “It was still embarrassing, besides
I bet all of Gryffindor expect that kind of behavior from you now.”

“Maybe so, but hey I am not the only Gryffindor that likes to party a bit too much.”
Regulus took a bite of his meal before responding, “I bet. By the way, I haven't heard of any
pranks being performed on Gryffindor, what the deal with that?”

James groaned at the thought of the fruitless conversations he had had with the other Marauders on
the subject of possibly pranking their own house rather than Slytherin.

“Why the bloody hell would we want to prank ourselves?” Sirius snorted out laughter as if the idea
was preposterous.

James tried again, “It wouldn't be on ourselves, it would be on the rest of the house. Come on guys,
we don't want people to start thinking we are predictable because we always prank the same
house.”

“There is no better house to prank than the snakes, besides it could be traced back to us too easily
if we pranked everyone in our house but ourselves.”

Peter nodded in solidarity, “Yeah Padfoot’s right. I say we prank the snake pit again.”

Remus gave James an apologetic look, “Sorry Prongs, I am with them on this one.”

James sighed but nodded in understanding.

Now he had to be the one to explain to the very stubborn baby Black why James was going back on
his word. He scratched the back of his neck before responding, “Uh listen I tried, I really did, but
they didn't go for it. They said that the snakepit was too fun to prank, but I promise I will keep half
my word and warn you on whatever prank we pull.”

Regulus looked at him with a calculating look and James was feeling a bit frightened by the cold
look on his boyfriend's face. Boyfriend, was that the right word? James wasn't sure but he decided
not to think about it at this very moment.

Regulus finally spoke in a very controlled tone, “Fine. Then we will just have to do it ourselves.”
James gaped, “Uh excuse me?”

Regulus rolled his eyes as if James' surprise was annoying to him, “Well obviously I am not going
to let you go back on your word and if you feel like you need someone to help you perform a
prank, then I will help you.”

“Yo– You are g–going to help me pull a prank? On Gryffindor?”

Regulus nodded and then went back to eating as if the situation was decided. James shook his head
before asking again, “You're going to help me pull a prank?”

Regulus sighed and looked back at James, “Obviously, that's what I just said isn’t it?”

“Yes but…Have you ever pranked anyone?”

“My brother and I used to prank each other when we were kids.”

“Oh, well um okay then.” James didn't know why the idea of Regulus and Sirius pranking each
other surprised him, but it did. Probably because two had been distant nearly the entire time James
had known them.

Regulus nodded and went back to eating and James found himself following suit as if the decision
was completely decided. That's when he noticed the people walking in the front door.

Regulus must have seen them at the same time because suddenly he ducked, “Fuck.”

James was shocked but he recovered quickly, grabbing the invisibility cloak that he had taken with
him to sneak them both out of the castle and hauled it over the two of them. He didn't ask whether
Regulus was okay with it before he grabbed him from his hiding place and pulled him against him
so they were both hidden from the two new customers. James didn't know if he could be more
shocked if Voldemort and Dumbledore had walked in together, because his two best friends and
Regulus' older brother had just walked in at the place that they happened to be on a date.

Sirius and Remus sat at a table not far from James and Regulus, though it was far enough that
neither could hear the other's conversation. James supposed he shouldn't be surprised that the two
of them had decided to come for some drinks as both Peter and he were on dates. Although this
must mean that Sirius never found a girl to hang out with tonight, his careful outfit planning was
wasted on Remus. As he looked at the two of them he realized that they looked more awkward
than usual, which James thought was weird, but maybe they just didn't spend much time together
without him or Peter.

“Why the fuck are they here?” Regulus whispered, his eyes glued on the two boys.

James shrugged, not taking his eyes off the boys either, “I have no idea.”

“Do you think they saw us?”

James couldn't help but snort, “If they saw us I think I'd have Sirius punching me in the jaw right
about now, so no I don't believe so.”

“Oh yeah, I guess that's true. They look a bit uncomfortable, don't they?”

James had been thinking the same thing as he watched the two speaking to the waitress, “Yeah
they do.”

James heard Regulus suck in a sharp breath as he saw Sirius scanning the bar and landing on their
table before turning away again. Fuck they had to get out of here.

“Are you done with your food? I think we should go.”

Regulus nodded but then asked, seeming uncertain, “Yeah I am good but how are we going to get
out of here and how are we going to pay without them seeing us?”

“We are going to leave our money on the table and then we are going to carefully move together,
so we don't get seen.”

Regulus nodded and then reached for his pocket before James stopped him, “What the fuck do you
think you're doing?”
Regulus looked at James like he was dumb, “I'm paying obviously.”

James snorted in laughter before reaching for his wallet and slapping money for them both on the
table, “No you aren't. I asked for the date, I am paying.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “James I am wealthy. I can pay for our dinner.”

James smirked at Regulus, “Reg I don't know where you get this idea that I am somehow hurting
for money but you're dead wrong. The Potters may not be quite as wealthy as the Blacks but we are
well off.”

Regulus blushed, presumably embarrassed by his assumption and James grabbed his hand before
asking, “Okay, are you ready?”

Regulus nodded and the two of them slowly made their way towards the door only briefly hearing
a snippet of his friend's conversation, “Sirius I'm pretty sure that money has been sitting there since
we got here. It didn't just appear.”

James pulled Regulus a bit faster after that and as soon as they were a good ways away from the
bar James slipped the cloak off their shoulders and began laughing. Regulus joined him and soon
the boys were struggling to breathe from laughing too hard.

The two boys walked back to the school, deciding to take the grounds rather than the tunnel as it
was late enough for it to be abandoned anyway. The two chatted about various things but all James
could think about the whole way was whether Regulus would want to join him in the Room of
Requirement or not.

They were just outside the entrance to the school when James stopped them and turned Regulus to
him, “So Reggie, I had a great time on our date. Did you?”

Regulus smirked at him, “No. James Potter, you are an awful date to have. You compliment me
way too much. You demand to pay for my dinner. And you even took me to a place that was
disgusting but had surprisingly good food.”
James grinned at him, “So you did like the food and the date! I knew it.”

Regulus laughed a bit before leaning into James, the two met lips and shared a short but
nonetheless lovely kiss. Exactly the type of kiss that one would expect to receive after a date.
James was willing to leave it at that, rather than asking Reg to spend the night with him, as it was
the proper thing to do.

He was willing to do that, at least until Regulus asked him, “So, the Room of Requirement?”

James grinned, “Fuck yes.”

*********************************************************************************

Peter

Peter was speechless and he had never really been speechless since he was a baby, but right now he
truly had nothing to say. He wasn't a bigot and he was happy for his friends but damn he had not
suspected it, especially since Sirius and Marlene had dated for a long time. He supposed he knew
why his friends had been acting weird as of late. He suspected something was going on but
certainly not this.

He wasn't actually even supposed to be here, so he felt a little bad about interrupting, but
Magdalene and his date was cut short. Her friend Gerildene had burst in on their date crying
because the guy she was dating, Jason Keifer, a seventh-year Ravenclaw had cheated on her with
Chelsey Scott a fifth-year Hufflepuff. Magdalene had apologized to him and taken her friend off to
comfort her, so Peter was now dreadfully bored.

Apparently, all of his friends were occupied for the night. James was off with his mysterious
Bunny, Mary was on a date, Remus, Sirius, and Marlene were all missing in action. Hence his
reasoning for going searching for them.

“What the fuck Peter!” Dorcas screeched as she pulled the sheet over her naked body. Peter had
immediately slapped his hand over his eyes and was attempting to leave the room blind. He had
thought he was almost out until he suddenly ran into a wall.

“Fuck!” He fell backward and rubbed his head but still had his eyes squeezed shut.
He felt hands pulling him up and he stumbled to his feet as Marlene spoke, “Jesus Pete. Are you
okay?”

Peter nodded in her general direction before he heard Dorcas sigh, “We put on clothes, Peter. Open
your eyes before you give yourself a concussion.”

Peter slowly opened his eyes and was thankful that both the girls had thrown on some clothes,
though Marlene did have a large hickey on her neck, “Uh I'm so sorry about walking in, I was just
bored and was hoping Marlene would want to play chess.”

Marlene rolled her eyes, “It's fine Pete. Where's Magdalene? I thought you were hanging out with
her tonight?”

“I was but one of her friends had some emergency and I can't find anyone else. I'm bored.”

Dorcas laughed a bit at Peter's pouting, “Well as much as we’d love to have a stallion like you in
our bed, I don't think Maggie would approve so you are probably going to have to look elsewhere
for entertainment.”

Although he knew she was just joking, he flushed at the idea, and then he cringed at the image of
Magdalene cutting his dick off if he ever cheated, “Thats fine, i'll go. You ladies have a lovely
night.”

He was almost out the door when Marlene called him, he turned his head, “Yeah?”

“Hey we haven't exactly told anyone about this, would you mind keeping it a secret for now?”

Peter smiled at them, “Of course. My lips are sealed.”

After Peter left the room and tried to get the image of what the two girls were doing out of his
head, he headed up the stairs to his own empty dorm. He wasn't sure where Remus and Sirius were
but he figured it was worth a try to find them. He went to James’s bedside table and grabbed the
Marauders map out.
He hadn't even considered that he could possibly be breaking his and the rest of the Marauders'
promise not to check on James when he was on a date. It hadn't even crossed his mind that he
might actually see who Bunny was. In fact, even when he saw who Bunny was, he didn't consider
that it could actually be James’s boyfriend. His only thoughts were to find Sirius and Remus, so
when he opened the map he strictly was searching for their names.

He couldn't find their names at all and only then did he decide to look for James. He found him
walking through the castle towards the seventh floor. He didn't even process that James wasn't
alone until he checked to see which corridor James was in.

He heard himself gasp, dramatically and he instantly felt like Sirius. Why the hell would James be
walking around with the likes of Regulus Black at this time at night?

No. Nope. No fucking chance. There was a glitch in the map, there had to be.

Before Peter even knew what he was doing he was rushing down the stairs and out into the corridor
with the map in his hands. James and Regulus had just passed the common room and were heading
to the Room of Requirement, or at least Peter guessed that's where they were heading.

He only caught up to them as they were in front of the wall and James was walking back and forth
to get the door to appear. It was odd seeing it in person. On paper, it was bad enough but in person,
it was a betrayal.

Then the unthinkable happened, just as the door appeared Regulus Black pulled James into a kiss
right there in the hallway where Peter was watching from behind a suit of armor. Peter wasn't sure
why he expected James to push Regulus away, but he was surprised when the older boy deepened
the kiss.

He watched as his best friend snogged his other best friends, little brother.

He watched as he hitched the younger boy up by the thighs and carried him into the room.

He watched as the door to the room disappeared.

He stood there for who knows how long in utter disbelief. How could James do this? Peter had no
problem with James’s preferences but why did he have to pick Regulus? He picked the absolute
worst person to date. Sirius was going to kill them both when he found out. If he found out.

It was then and there that despite not making the same promise to James as he did Marlene, Peter
vowed to keep this a secret too. This kind of secret could destroy the Marauders from the inside and
it was honestly a scary thought.

Christ, why did all his friends have been letting their secrets out tonight? As much as he loved
gossip, this was almost too much, especially since he couldn't tell anyone.

Peter went straight to bed after that, no longer in the mood to play chess. He could not fall asleep
for the life of him. All he could think about was how James and Regulus could possibly work. It
made no sense to him.

He had been awake for a couple hours, though he had his curtain closed when he heard some of his
roommates. He figured it might be James and he knew he wouldn't be able to look his friend in the
eye at the moment so he just pretended he was asleep.

That is until he heard exaggerated and drunk whispering, “Shhh you're going to wake up Wormy.”

So it was Sirius then, that much was obvious and it must've been Remus who responded, “Well
then we will just have to stay quiet.”

Then there was silence, or mostly silence, except for some small noises. Which normally wouldn't
have made Peter take a peek outside of his curtain except one of the noises sounded distinct like a
moan and Peter was nosy.

He regretted his nosiness almost instantly as he saw his friends locked in a passionate kiss. Merlin
what the fuck was in the water at this school. Why the fuck were all of his friends involved in illicit
affairs?

Whatever happened to being straightforward about a relationship? He was feeling quite queasy as
he quickly muttered a silencing spell around his bed. God forbid he heard anything going on
between his two friends outside of his safe space. He had seen so many of his friends in sexual
displays tonight he was beginning to consider poking his eyes out.

He analyzed everything he had seen tonight.

Marlene and Dorcas were obviously together and probably had been for a while. They asked him to
keep it a secret. He didn't think it would be very hard to keep it a secret. Honestly, their relationship
wasn't that problematic and was the least of his current worries.

James and Regulus were easily his biggest worry at the moment. James had admitted that he had
been in a relationship with the boy for months. They were still continuing it and it appeared to be
guilt-free, which was fucked up if you asked Peter. Regulus and Sirius didn't have a good
relationship, but he was still his brother and James should know that it's a terrible idea to get
involved with someone in his best friend's family, especially considering that family was full of
dark wizards. He would keep it a secret, but he knew it was going to be hard to look at James in the
same way.

Sirius and Remus were not the most problematic but they did bring up some issues. For one, what
if the two of them broke up? The entire Marauder group would be affected by that. Also, Peter was
a little worried that Sirius would suddenly realize he didn't like guys and break Moony’s heart, as
the boy had never dated men before. Overall Peter figured he might as well keep their secret,
considering he seemed to be keeping everyone else's tonight.

The only thing Peter really knew for sure was that there was no way he was getting any sleep
tonight.
 Halloween
Chapter Notes

Happy Jegulus week! I worked extra hard to get this chapter out in time for this week,
hope you enjoy it!

Regulus

Regulus usually hated the Halloween feast. The food was always good and the professors were
generally a lot more lenient during the holiday, yet he still didn't enjoy the feast itself. It was
probably because for five years, without fail, his brother has been systematically ruining it for
him.

Sirius and the rest of the Marauder's pranks were always annoying and sometimes vaguely
harmful. They habitually did a Halloween prank every year, which had never made much sense to
Regulus as it seemed odd that they would want to ruin everyone's holiday for the sake of a laugh.
He supposed maybe everyone didn't hate it as he and the other Slytherins did. He recalled seeing a
couple of people laugh at almost every prank they pulled, but Regulus and his friends never
enjoyed them.

That was probably because more often than not Slytherin was targeted for the pranks, as the
Marauders apparently got great joy out of teasing them. This year though, Regulus had it on good
authority that the Halloween prank was to be pulled on the whole school, staff included. He
remembered his conversation with his anonymous source.

“James I don't want to be pranked at all. Isn't there any way you could leave me out of it?”

James chuckled at Regulus’s whining, “No Reggie. If you are the only one who doesn't get pranked
it will look weird. Besides we are even performing the prank on ourselves, we certainly can't leave
you out of it.”

Regulus pouted, he had discovered that he could pretty much get James to agree with him
whenever he looked cross enough, which was a very useful talent in this situation.

James, the bastard, held his gaze steadfastly, “Sorry Reggie, it's unavoidable but at least you will
have a warning of it.”
“Fine, but nothing too ridiculous please.”

James smiled and kissed the top of Regulus’s head, “It's all random, Bunny.”

Regulus glared.

Regulus had been pissed a week ago when James refused to let him skip out on their ridiculous
prank but he supposed at least this year he will know what to expect.

James hadn't told him exactly when during the feast the prank would take place, but he knew that
he would be aware as soon as it was in effect. It was the sort of thing one could hardly miss.

When he suddenly heard screams and laughs from the Hufflepuff table he realized the spell must
have been placed, one table at a time, starting at the farthest from the Slytherin table.

He listened as the screams and laughter increased as each table was incanted. The Slytherins on his
sides were out of their seats peering throughout the Great Hall to try to see what the commotion
was, even though everyone already knew it was the Marauders.

When it was the Slytherin tables’ turn to be incanted, Regulus could practically feel the spell wash
over him. He heard Mulciber yelling angrily and Snape furiously trying to reverse the spell, which
was ineffective. Regulus knew for a fact that no one could take off their costume until midnight
tonight, so their attempts felt more pathetic than anything to him.

He looked at Barty and Evan to see which costume the spell randomly chose for them. Barty was
wearing what looked to be a pirate costume, it had a hat and sword to match the red and black
ensemble. Evan was wearing a medical coat, a face mask, and scrubs so Regulus assumed he was a
muggle doctor of some kind.

Barty seemed to be doing the same as him, because when his eyes landed on Regulus he burst out
laughing which caused Evan to look over and laugh as well.

Barty sputtered out in between laughs, “Merlin Regs! You know I despise the Marauders, but
they've outdone themselves on your costume!”
Regulus did not understand until he looked in the silver of his empty plate and saw his face, he
nearly combusted. He was going to fucking murder James Potter.

James, who had clearly lied when he said the spell randomized costumes, had decided that it would
be hilarious to give Regulus big floppy ears, whiskers, and a painted face to make him a bunny. He
seriously hated that boy sometimes.

As Regulus looked around he noticed that while many of the costumes repeated each other, there
was not one other bunny in the entire hall. James might be a fucking idiot, but Regulus had to give
him props, he was just cheeky enough that Regulus found it endearing.

He wasn't really paying attention to the rest of that hall but he briefly heard Dumbledore
announcing, in a garish costume of his own, that the prank was good-natured and that it was in the
spirit of the holiday.

Typical, the old bat never held the Marauders responsible for anything they did, only McGonagall
did, but it appeared she was going to let it go this time too. He snapped back to attention when the
men of the hour stood up and hopped up on the table, taking took turns bowing to the rest of the
hall. Some people cheered and some people booed at them, they didn't appear to mind either way.

They all appeared to be dressed as animals of some sort. James had deer antlers on and a painted
face, Pettigrew had his face painted as well and paired it with a pink tail, Sirius had dog ears and a
much more fluffy tail on, and Remus….well his was the most interesting of all. The Marauders
were ballsy Regulus would give them that.

They had made the most absolutely ridiculous decision, to dress him up in quite literally the one
secret he has to keep from the school. That's right Remus Lupin was dressed as a fucking werewolf.
Fucking idiots, all of them.

James bowed toward the Slytherin side, winking at Regulus on his way, which caused the
Slytherins to boo louder. Regulus blushed a bit, and even though it was a ridiculous thought to
have, he sort have thought a being dressed as a stag fit James well.

“What a fucking prat Potter is,” Evan grumbled not looking very happy to be wearing a costume.

When Regulus had asked his friends if they thought that he should wear a costume for the party,
they had told him point break that he would look like a bloody idiot if he did, and now they would
be forced to wear one too. Karma is a sweet thing, isn't it?

Barty grumbled his agreement, but seemed to get over his current attire quicker than Evan had, as
he turned to Reg and asked, “Hey what time do you wanna head down to the pitch? I was planning
on changing my outfit but I guess that's not really an option anymore.”

Regulus couldn't help the quirk of his lips, “Yeah I have a feeling everyone's going to get there a
lot quicker than they planned. You guys can go down without me, I need to pick a friend up on the
way.”

Barty glanced over at Evan, who appeared to be still complaining about the costumes to Avery
who was on the other side of him, before looking back and lowering his voice, “You mean Crest,
right?”

Regulus nodded, he hadn't exactly been keeping their friendship a secret but he also hadn't
mentioned her to them, “Remy, yeah I was planning on introducing her to you guys tonight
actually.”

Barty gave him a look that Regulus couldn't interpret, “I've met her before Regs.”

“Yeah I know that you know of each other, but be honest have you ever actually spoken?”

“No, I suppose not.”

Regulus pulled a satisfied look, “See and after tonight you won't be able to say any the same.”

Barty just looked at him a moment before responding, “Okay, well then I'll see you at this pitch
later, okay?”

“Yeah see you later.”

Regulus went to stop by his dorm before he went to pick up Remy, whether he could change his
outfit or not, he still wanted to make sure his hair looked good. Once he got to get a better look at
himself in the mirror, he cursed James Potter and his cleverness, he looked ridiculous. He wasn't
the only student whose costume was an animal but without a doubt, he and those other students
looked the worst. Why couldn't he have been a muggle doctor like Barty?

After he had tamed his hair the best he could around the bunny ears that were sprouted there, he
decided that it was around the time he should be picking up Remy. Luckily the Hufflepuff common
room wasn't far from Slytherins, not compared to Ravenclaw or Gryffindor.

He waited beside the barrels that surrounded the entrance to the Hufflepuff common room until
Remy came out, ten minutes later than the time they had agreed on. Regulus sort of hated tardiness
and Remy the more he realized that she didn't like living her life by a schedule, his worst
nightmare. Surprisingly though he was finding he minded it less and less whether she was late or
early the more time they spent together.

“Hey, Reg!” Remy exclaimed as she exited the common room.

Regulus turned to her and saw her Marauder provided costume, she looked to be a renaissance
woman of sorts. She was wearing a long-sleeve purple gown and her hair had been fastened half up
- half down, this made her look strangely tame instead of her normally chaotic curls.

She gave him a twirl with a grin on her face, “What do you think?”

Regulus couldn't fight his own smile at her excitement, “You look great. Loads better than I do at
least.”

She laughed and then threw her arm around his waist as they started their way to the pitch party, “I
think you look adorable, Reg.”

He rolled his eyes because of course Remy wouldn't see any problem with his attire, she seemed to
be practically blind to his faults.

“So did you get the tip-off on this prank?”

Regulus snapped his eyes to hers in a moment of pure panic, had she really just said what he
thought she did? Oh god did she know about him and James? How is that possible when they've
been so careful? Unless James had been letting it slip to people, because Regulus knew for sure he
hadn't even mumbled a word about the two of them.

“Why would I have been tipped off?” He tried to sound nonchalant as he asked her about her
suspicions.

She shrugged, “I don't know. I mean I know you and Sirius don't talk a lot but I figured it was
possible he mentioned it to you.”

Regulus could practically feel the tension leaking out of his shoulders as he threw an arm over
Remy's shoulder. Thank god she didn't guess about James and him, he had no idea what he
would've done if people actually found out, find a cliff probably. “No, I haven't talked to Sirius
since we saw him down by the greenhouses.”

She glanced up at him, “Oh wow I guess I figured you talked more than that at least, with the way
he was worrying over you like a mother hen last time.”

Regulus remembered how Sirius had acted that day and he completely understood why Remy
would be confused bout that behavior, because honestly, he was too. He had tried not to give it too
much thought, as he knew that it was probably just a fluke. Hell even if it wasn't Regulus didn't
know what that would mean. Sirius and he had been on completely different planes of existence for
a long time, and he really didn't see any possibility of them ever being on the same one ever again.

“Yeah, I see why that would've been confusing but he was probably just trying to seem like a good
brother in front of Lupin.”

She looked at him doubtfully, “I don't know if that's true. I mean Remus has been his friend since
the first year, why would he be trying to impress him all of a sudden?”

“I don't know. I mean that had a huge falling out last year, maybe he's still making it up to him
from that. Either way, trust me when I say that Sirius and I are about as close as Neptune and
Mercury.”

She snorted, “You would make an astronomy analogy, dork.”

That, thankfully, was enough of a topic change for Regulus to bring up the latest astronomy
developments he had been reading about. Predictably, Remy listened as he explained the new
discovery of a star by one of his favorite British muggle astronomers.

Remy was good like that, she never minded listening to him when he rambled on about things that
no one except him probably cared about. He appreciated that, as he couldn't ever talk about the
subjects in front of Evan or Barty, without hearing them complain about how boring the subject
was.

As they neared the pitch, Regulus could already hear the music, so it must've been loud. It sounded
like the sort of music Sirius or James would listen to. James had shown him some music by
someone called Bowie. Regulus hadn't hated it, so he figured he could make it through the party
with minimal discomfort, caused by the music anyways.

“Ohhh it sounds like there are already quite a few people down there. Plus they're all going to be
wearing costumes! This is gonna be great!”

Regulus smirked at Remy’s excitement. She wasn't usually much of a party person, as she
preferred a more relaxed environment, but she had been talking about this party all week and he
knew she was really excited, “Yeah it'll be sort of funny to see what costumes everyone got saddled
with, don't you think?”

Remy grinned at him, “Oh absolutely! Like Snape or Mulciber! Ohh and what the ever-living
creep Rowle.”

“Snape and Mulciber are in a twin costume actually, from some muggle book. They are wearing
matching red outfits and Snape’s says thing one and Mulciber’s says thing two. They are livid
about it.”

She burst into a fit of giggles, “That is fucking priceless! I loved that book when I was a kid, it's
called a Cat in the Hat.”

Regulus furrowed his eyebrows, “Really? That's a peculiar title for a novel.”

She rolled her eyes at him, “It's hardly a novel, Reg. So what about Rowle, what costume is he in?”

Regulus stiffened a bit at the name. Nathaniel Rowle made him more uncomfortable than anyone
he had ever met. He tried to avoid even looking at the boy, but sometimes he could feel a pair of
eyes on him and he knew they were his. Rowle was always staring at Regulus, he tried not to take
it personally as the guy creeped everyone out, but it was hard when you had a pair of dead soulless
eyes following you around.

Regulus shivered a bit at the thought of Rowle and his eyes, “No, I try not to look at that guy. He's
fucking terrifying.”

Remy nodded her agreement, she even shivered a bit at the thought of the boy, “I hear that.
Anyways back to the subject of the party, when did you want me to meet your friends?”

Regulus was grateful for the change of subject away from Rowle, “Honestly I am surprised you are
not backing out.”

Remy rolled her eyes and scoffed at him, “Please Reg, I never go back on my word. I'll meet them,
even if it will probably end in disaster.”

“You don't know that.” He sighed when he noticed the disbelieving look in her eyes. Why was
everyone sure that this meeting was such a terrible idea? He decided to propose a compromise,
“How about I introduce you right away so that if it goes bad, we can get you drunk and pretend it
never happened.”

Remy grinned at him as they approached the entrance to the pitch, “If you promise to drink away
the memory with me, then you've got yourself a deal.”

“Then it’s a deal.”

As they stepped onto the pitch, Regulus could already feel the energy from the mass of people
already there. It was pretty clear that some people had already got into the alcohol by their
stumbling and their attempts to yell over the music.

The party was on one end of the pitch and someone had amplified a record player so that the sound
could reach the entire party. There were tables full of drinks and snacks spread out throughout the
party so that people wouldn't congest into one area.

“Oooh it's so chaotic here, I love it.”

Regulus laughed at Remy’s proclamation, but he had to admit he quite liked the atmosphere as
well. It was nothing like the party in the Slytherin common room he had been in last year, it was so
much better. Way more inclusive and less posh by a long shot.

He spotted Evan and Barty by one of the drink tables, right away. He figured now was as good of a
time as any to introduce Remy, “There's Evan and Barty. Should we just go over now?”

Remy looked at the two boys warily but nodded, “Yeah we might as well get it over with.”

Regulus had to agree. He thought that this was going to go just fine, but both Remy and James had
planted seeds of doubt in his mind, so he would rather just know how his nights going to go, right
away. He grabbed Remy’s hand and squeezed it encouragingly as the two of them walked towards
Regulus’s friends.

As the two of them approached the boys, they seemed to have caught Barty’s attention, who just
raised his eyebrows in acknowledgment. Evan didn't notice them until they had stopped right next
to him, “Finally Reg. We’ve been–.”

His words seemed to be lost as he stared at Remy, then Regulus, and then at their attached hands.
Regulus considered letting go of her hand, as he didn't want his friends to think Remy and him
were romantic in any way. In the end, he decided that it was more important for him to show his
support to her than to save face, as the only reason she was doing this was because of him.

Regulus cleared his throat, “Hey guys. So even though you all already sort of know each other I
thought I should introduce you properly. So Remy this is Barty Crouch and this is Evan Rosier.
Guys this is Remy Crest, she and I are pretty good friends now, so I thought you'd like to meet her
seeing as you're all my friends.”

Regulus knew that he had rambled a bit too much but he couldn't help but feel anxious about their
reactions. Barty looked as aloof as he did anytime and Evan's expression was unreadable, which
was rare for Evan.

Barty reacted first and was surprisingly civil, for Barty at least. He did a two-finger salute, “Crest.”

Regulus let out a sigh of relief, at least one of his friends was going to be civil to her. Besides
Regulus felt Barty was the bigger challenge to find civility in out of his two friends. She smiled at
Barty and gave him a nod, “Crouch.”

“So what you're banging a mudblood now?”

Regulus felt as if he had been slapped. He turned to Evan and was met with a heated glare. He was
speechless he truly didn't know what to say. Had his friend really just said that? He simply couldn't
believe it. Barty was the first to speak, “Fuck off Evan, don–.”

Evan interrupted him, clearly raging. It was as if his earlier question was just the capper on his
vehement fury at seeing the two of them together, “What? We’re supposed to be respectful of this
little half-blooded cunt. She's out here corrupting Regulus and we’re supposed to act like it's okay.
This is probably the little slut that he's been running around with behind our backs. Now that he's
finally got the courage to bring her in the light, he expects us to rejoice over the fact that he's acting
like a fucking blood traitor, all for some mudblood pussy.”

Regulus had never felt so much rage in his life. He could feel the patent Black temper start to rise
up in his chest and he wanted nothing more than to knock Evan Rosier unconscious. How fucking
dare he treat Remy this way. How dare he even use that kind of language in front of her. Who the
fuck did he think he was?

He stepped up to Evan about to knock that fucking sneer off his face when suddenly a fist punched
him in the nose before Regulus had even got the chance. Blood started pouring out from his nose
almost immediately but Regulus couldn't find a hint of remorse for his oldest friend.

He assumed that Barty had punched him, probably to stick up for Regulus which he appreciated.
He turned to Barty to find him looking impressed but not like he just punched someone. He raised
his hands up as if he was saying he was innocent, a word that could never be used to describe
Barty, “Don't look at me man. That was all firecracker over there.”

Regulus turned to Remy, not even realizing that she had released his hand to punch Evan in the
face. He had never felt so proud in his life. She spoke in an eerily calm voice, “Misogynistic pig.”

Evan muttered some type of profanity before storming off, either to go find Mulciber and his pack
or to go clean up, Regulus didn't care either way. Barty let out a snort, which sort of pissed Regulus
off, considering he couldn't find anything about the current situation amusing, “Well that was
fucking eventful. It was so much worse than I even thought it would be.” Barty turned to Remy and
winked, “Nice punch firecracker.”
Regulus watched as Barty grabbed a bottle from the nearby table and sauntered off into the crowd,
before turning to Remy with an apology written all over his face, “I am so sorry, Rem. I had no
idea that he would do that. Hell, I had no idea he even felt that way.”

She had clearly lost her excitement in her eyes, which made Regulus feel absolutely terrible. Never
in his wildest dreams had he imagined either one of his friends saying those terrible things to her.

Remy surprised him, like she always did, by pulling him in for a hug. Despite her being much
shorter than him, he sunk into her embrace, “Hey I know you didn't mean for that to happen. I don't
blame you at all and I know you were about to defend me, but I don't like bullies and I have no
problem handling them myself, okay?”

As they parted, she pulled a smirk onto her face when he nodded his understanding to what she had
just said, “Your friend is a dick, so don't expect me to hang out with him again. Crouch seemed
alright though.”

Regulus scowled at the thought of ever letting Rosier near Remy again, “No you won't be, and
neither will I.”

She looked at him a long moment before nodding as if she was saying, she understood whatever
choice he decides to make, “Alright, well I believe you promised me we’d get drunk to forget that
interaction ever took place if it was necessary and I would say it is necessary.”

He chuckled a bit, but still didn't feel quite up to drinking, “Yeah. Why don't you get started, I sort
of want to talk to Barty first.”

“Okay sounds good. I'll go have a couple of drinks with Libby over there and then you'll have to
catch up when you're done.” She flounced away to join a couple of her other friends and Regulus
was left standing there, wondering what the fuck just happened.

Had Evan really said all of those things? Had that really been the same boy he met on the train five
years ago? Regulus didn't know if that was possible, because the Evan Rosier he used to know
would have never even considered using the kind of language he had just used to Remy. He
supposed he had lost that Evan forever, because this new one was more like Mulciber than he
thought.

He started to wander through the party looking for Barty, knowing he had to get his friend's
opinion on what just happened to discuss with him what had just taken place. That was when he
saw it.

Lily Evans laughing and smiling at his boyfr– Well whatever they were. How fucking dare she?
Actually how dare he let her flirt with him right in front of Regulus?

While James didn't look particularly flirtatious, it was pretty clear that Lily was flirting. She had
twirled or flipped her hair at least four times since he’d been watching them. He had always
wondered why she had never seemed to find James interesting before when he was always fawning
over her, but he was pretty sure he understood now. Lily Evans wanted what she couldn't have,
while she didn't know James was with someone else, she did know that he had stopped paying her
attention and now she wanted him.

Regulus started to feel sick at the thought of James realizing her intentions. He might have already,
even though he could be quite dense, you'd have to be blind to not notice the blatant flirting. He
wondered if James would be happy that his affections were finally returned or would he reject them
in favor of Regulus. Regulus didn't know if he wanted to ponder that thought too much.

He decided to leave it be before his night went from terrible to a travesty. He found Barty at the
edge of the party with a bottle of rum in one hand and a cigarette in his other. When Regulus came
to lean on the siding of the pitch with him, Barty offered the bottle, which Regulus took a big swig
of relishing in the burn in his throat. Barty then handed him a cigarette, which Regulus also took,
lighting it wandlessly.

He took a drag before handing the bottle back to Barty and sighing, “That was bloody terrible.”

Barty snorted in apparent agreement, “The worst. Didn't know Evan had such an extensive
vocabulary.”

“Neither did I. I just can't believe he would do that.”

Barty murmured something that Regulus could quite hear so he turned to look at Barty, “What?”

Barty sighed as if he really didn't want to have to repeat his mumblings, “I said that I am not
surprised.”
Regulus’s face contorted in confusion, “What? How aren’t you?”

Barty rolled his eyes, “I am not surprised and neither should you be honest. I mean what did you
expect? Did you think that Rosier would just be chill about you being friends with a half-blood?
Merlin Regs, he's practically a permanent part of Mulcibers dark lord fan club, of course, he's going
to be prejudiced.”

“Neither of you have ever said anything bad about half-bloods, how the fuck was a supposed to
know? Are you telling me that you think him acting the way he did is okay?”

Barty rolled his eyes and took a swig of rum, “Obviously I don't. What he did was cold and coming
from me, that means something. I don't have any problem with half-bloods and neither did Evan,
once upon a time before he started hanging out with those idiots.”

“I'm not forgiving him.”

Barty nodded, “Yeah I figured you wouldn't.”

A little more forcefully Regulus repeated his previous statement, “No, I mean it. I am done with
him.”

Barty looked a bit surprised but that quickly morphed into understanding, “Okay Regs, you're
done. Then I guess I am done too.”

Regulus couldn't hold in his surprise and he was sure he gasped or something, but fuck he didn't
expect that kind of solidarity. Barty was willing to throw away a friendship with Evan, who he had
been friends with just as long as with Regulus, for him.

“You really don't have to do that, you know?”

Barty shook his head and slung his arm over Regulus’s shoulder, “Nah of course I do. Evans has
been a prat for months and you are my best friend. Anyone you hate, I hate, and all that bullshit.”

Regulus couldn't hold back a grin, maybe he lost Evan tonight, but he felt like his friendship with
Barty was only strengthened by the loss, “Does that mean anyone I like, you like?”

Barty groaned, “If you are talking about Crest–”

“I am.”

Barty rolled his eyes at the interruption but Regulus could see the beginnings of a smile on his lips,
“Fine if you like her then I guess I will try to like her as well.”

Regulus, still grinning, threw his arm around Barty, “Thank you. Alright, I told her that I would go
and get drunk with her and you're coming with.”

Barty groaned but Regulus could see a smile on his face.

At that moment Regulus felt so lucky to have both Barty and Remy.

********************************************************************************

James

“Come on Potter even you have to admit, that as fun as pranks are, if you end up head boy, you
won't be able to do them.”

“Then I guess I can't be Head Boy because a world without pranks is a world I don't want to live
in.”

Lily laughed at that, she actually laughed. In fact, the distinctly prudish Lily Evans had been
laughing at everything James had said for the last ten minutes. To be fair she was a bit drunk, but
James figured it still counted. Maybe she was beginning not to despise him so much.

He hope that was true as he had always genuinely liked Lily and wanted to be friends with her, his
hormones just always happened to get in the way. Lately, though he had barely spoken to her,
mostly because he was busy with Reg. He figured she probably enjoyed the break and it gave her
time to miss his company.
Speaking of Reg, James had seen young Slytherin storm off to the corner of the pitch after his
friend Crouch. James wasn't sure what happened when Regulus had brought Remy over to his other
friends, but he had been watching in the corner of his eye, it hadn't looked to be very successful.

He figured Regulus would be pretty upset and James figured he’d go see him later and see if he
could cheer him up a bit. Unfortunately, it wasn't an option for James to go talk to Regulus in the
middle of the party, no matter how much he wished to.

Lily looked a little nervous before she spoke next, which was irregular for her, she was usually a
very confident girl, “So James I-I heard a rumor that you– “

“I need to talk to you.” A slurring voice interrupted and when James looked in the direction of the
voice he was surprised to see Peter walking towards him like he was on a mission.

“Hey, Pete. Yeah just one minute, Lily was about to say something.” James spoke and nodded for
Lily to continue, but she never got a chance.

Peter grabbed his arm and began dragging away, “No. We need to talk now.”

When they were away from Lily or any other groups of people James expected Peter to stop
dragging him but he didn't stop until they were outside the pitch boundaries. James found himself
behind one of the stands when Peter finally let him go.

“Merlin Wormy, was that really necessary?” James rubbed his arm in the spot that Peter had
grabbed and glared at his friend.

Peter glared back, which took James aback, “Sit down.”

Was Peter mad at him? Peter hardly ever got mad and James couldn't think for the life of him what
he had done to make his easy-going friend upset. They happened to be on a sloping hill, so James
sat down on the slightly damp grass. Peter did not sit down. In fact, he seemed to be sort of pacing
in front of James in an oddly erratic way.

“Hey, Pete. Are you okay, man?”

James was getting a bit concerned for his friend. It was obvious that the boy had been avoiding his
friends the entire week. James wasn't even sure if Peter had made eye contact with him in days.
One thing he knew for sure, was that his friend wasn't getting as much sleep as he needed. James
could hear him tossing and turning all night,t and he looked even more chaotic for school than he
usually did. His uniform wrinkled and his hair looked something like James’s did usually.

Ha had attempted to talk to Peter about it earlier in the week as did Sirius and Remus, but it was
hard to find Peter alone these days. This week especially he clung to Magdalene’s side like a leech.
The only real-time he would give them was to finalize the details on their prank.

Peter glared at him, “So what you and Lily are suddenly talking now? Or flirting? Or whatever that
was?”

James was taken aback by the venom in his voice and by what he said. While yes it appeared that
Lily did seem to want to talk to James, they certainly hadn't been flirting. And even if they had,
why the hell would Peter be so mad about it?

“Uh what I–”

“I mean she only spent five years turning you down and now all of a sudden she wants you?
Besides that, you have no right to flirt back with her!”

“Peter, what the fuck are you talking about?”

Peter leveled James with a cruel glare, “I am talking about the fact that not only are you
jeopardizing our entire friendship, and I like an idiot decide to cover for you, but you are now
jeopardizing your current relationship for someone who might finally be showing the time of day.
It's honestly pathetic–.”

Jeopardizing their friendship? His and Peters? What the fuck was actually going on here?

“If you are talking about my relationship with–”

“I am talking about your relationship with Regulus, obviously. I mean I'm certainly not happy
about it but if you're going to jeopardize the entire Marauders group then the least you can do is be
serious about him!”

Oh. Oh. Oh god. What did he just say?

James stared back at Peter Pettigrew, his best friend, because christ how had he known? How is it
possible that Peter found out about Regulus? James had always thought they were careful but Peter
knew. Not only that Peter had mentioned covering for him as if he had known for a while.

He opened his mouth multiple times, not sure what he could possibly say. Peter seemed to be
pausing his rampage to let James have the next words, the considerate friend that he was. Merlin,
James is the worst friend in the world for keeping this from him for so long.

James gulped finally deciding what to say, “How did you find out?”

Peter let out a sharp laugh that pained James, “How did I find out? I found out last weekend when I
saw the two of you snogging outside the Room of Requirement.”

James didn't know if he should be surprised, that was how Peter had found out but for some reason
he wasn't, “I am sorry for keeping this a secret from everyone and for lying to you guys. It wasn't
right of me.”

“You are sorry for keeping it a secret but not for doing it?”

James thought about it, he really did, but he already knew the answer before Peter had even said it,
“No, I am sorry for hurting you but I am not sorry for being with Reggie.”

Peter stared at him thoughtfully, “Reggie? Exactly how serious about him are you, James? If Lily
does decide she wants to be with you, would you drop Regulus for her? Because even if Sirius
didn't hate you for banging his brother, he'd hate you for breaking his heart?”

James knew that, deep down. That if or when Sirius found out it would be bad, but it would be so
much worse if something happened that hurt his little brother. It was odd to hear someone
confronting him with the very internal thoughts that had been running through his head for months.
He mostly ignored them, which was a little too easy to do when he was around Regulus.
James cleared his throat, “How serious am I about him? Well, let's just say I think about him pretty
much all day every day. The littlest things remind me of him. I always want to be with him. Also,
as much as I did and still do like Lily, when I am with Reg there is quite literally no one I’d rather
be with. So yeah, I would say I am very serious about him.”

Peter looked at him not betraying any emotion before he sighed deeply and sat down next to
James, “Why don't you tell me about how this all began?”

James hadn't realized until that moment just how much he wanted to tell someone about him and
Regulus. The only person who even had a hint of what was going on between them was professor
McGonagall and he didn't really think she would like it if he confided in her.

So James told him everything. From the moment they saw each other on the train to their date last
weekend. The only things he left out were the sex, him seeking out Remus for advice, and the fact
that James had promised to warn Regulus about pranks performed on Slytherins. He figured Peter
really didn't need to know that stuff.

Peter listened and nodded, but didn't say anything until James was done. Then he pulled an arm
around James’s shoulder and gave him a half hug, “Listen I am still pretty wary of this whole thing
you have with Regulus, but I would never stand in the way of your happiness and I hope you know
that. It's pretty obvious that you love and care for him.”

James didn't have time to think about the fact that now two of his friends had accused him of being
in love with Regulus, first Sirius now Peter, before Peter continued speaking, “I respect that
completely, however, I think you know that you can’t keep this a secret forever. Especially if this
is as serious as you say it is, eventually you are going to need to tell people, at least your friends.”

James nodded, because he had been thinking this for a while as well, but now that Peter knew, it all
became more real. He wanted his relationship with Regulus to be real and the only way for that to
happen was to make it public or semi-public, “I know. I am going to have to discuss it with
Regulus first, of course, but I really want to tell our friends.”

Peter nodded and then ruffled James’s hair as he stood up, “Okay well I am glad we had this talk. I
think I will be able to sleep a lot easier knowing the whole story. I am going to go grab Maggie and
go sleep in her room. I'm wiped.”

James nodded and watched as Peter left. He decided to take some time with his thoughts because
let's face it, he had a lot to think about. He was sort of glad Peter knew, because he really needed
someone to talk to about his relationship, but he also knew that Regulus would shit a brick if he
found out. Regulus had made it very clear that he never wanted anyone to find out about them and
he would surely accuse James of purposelessly letting his friend know if he found out. As much as
James didn't want to have that argument with Regulus, he also knew that he had to tell him,
because he deserved to know if anyone knew about him being gay.

He sat in the same place Peter had left him for a long time, well past the time it took to make his
arse numb. He wasn't sure how long it had been but he figured at least a couple of hours when he
heard a slurring voice call out, “Jamieeee!”

James jumped at the closeness of the voice, he hadn't realized anyone had been coming into the
area behind the pitch. He knew before he even looked that there were only three possible people it
could be because there were only three people that ever called him Jamie. The first one was his
mom, which was impossible because she wasn't at Hogwarts. The second was Sirius, which was
possible because he was a drunken fool and liked to drag others into his drunkenness. The third
was Regulus and he only really ever called James that when they were in bed.

He squinted to see the figure stumbling up the hill, through the darkness and found that it was
indeed Regulus. He was a bit surprised at Regulus’s clear drunken behavior considering he had
told James he would not be drinking much tonight, as he did not want to relive the toilet hugging
incident, “Hey Reggie. You all right there?”

Regulus snorted out a laugh and as soon as he reached James he plopped down on the grass beside
him, “I am actually great. Thank you for asking.”

James examined Regulus’s cute costume up close for the first time tonight, he was very glad he
had tweaked the spell to guarantee the bunny costume for him. He looked adorable, even when he
had been glaring at James, the moment after they had completed the prank, “You look a bit sloshed
there Reg. Are you having a good time?”

“Uh well, I wasn't. In fact, I was having the worst time, but now I am having fun.”

James tilted his head in question, “Why weren't you having fun before?”

Regulus seemed a bit unstable as he leaned back on his palms as he rushed out, “Well first you
gave me this costume that makes me look ridiculous. Then Evan was terrible to Remy. Then on top
of all that I saw Lily Evan flirting with you, but it all got better once I started doing shots.”
James' eyebrows furrowed as he tried to process all the information Regulus had just blurted out.
The costume part was easy, Regulus looked adorable, not ridiculous. Evan being terrible to Remy
was something he definitely wanted to revisit. Though he felt like he needed to address the Lily
comment first.

“Okay first of all Lily wasn't flirting with me and I definitely wasn't flirting with her, you have
absolutely nothing to worry about. Secondly, you are adorable in your costume, Bunny. Thirdly
why don't you explain more about what happened with Remy and Rosier?”

Regulus huffed as if it was such a hassle to get into it, “Okay well he said some really shitty things
to her and called her a– um a muggleborn but not in a nice way.”

James couldn't deny that he was happy that Regulus couldn't even manage to say such a terrible
curse word, “And what did you do about that?”

Regulus turned and put a pouty glare on his face, that paired with the bunny ears to make him look
the exact opposite way he was aiming, “Well I didn't just let him insult her, if that's what you are
assuming. I was about to punch him, but Remy beat me to it. I think she might have broken his
nose.”

James let out a bark of laughter and wished he hadn't missed that sight, “Damn I wish I could've
seen that.”

“I do, he was so mean. Then he ran away and I went to talk to Barty and I told him that I was done
with Evan for good. Do you know what he said?”

James truly had no idea what Barty would've responded to that, probably something that made
Reggie feel like shit though, “I am not sure, was it bad?”

Regulus was grinning all of sudden, which gave James absolutely no clue as to what Crouch said, it
just confused him more, “He said that if I was done with him then he was done with him too! He
said I was his best friend and he had my back and then we went and took shots with Remy. They
actually seemed to get along okay and then I came to find you.”

James couldn't say he wasn't surprised by the way tonight's events had gone for Regulus, especially
that Regulus seemed happy about them. He had sort of predicted it would go the way Regulus
wanted. As much as had always hated Regulus’s friends, he had to admit that from what Reg was
telling him, Crouch seemed like an alright lad. But he was happy about Regulus cutting off Evan
and taking Remy’s side, she would be a much better friend than him. Especially considering he's
been hanging around Mulciber and Snape so much, who James knew that Regulus didn't like.

James smiled back at Regulus, wondering if he should tell him about Peter knowing or not. He
knew that he’d have to tell him sooner rather than later, but he didn't necessarily think it was the
best idea to tell him while he was drunk, “I'm happy that your night turned around and I am even
happier that you came to find me. I missed you all night.”

Reggie smiled and leaned in to kiss James. Regulus, who usually tasted like mint, tasted of rum. As
he pulled away he could smell the strong scent of alcohol on his breath, which he must’ve been too
distracted before to notice. He touched one of Regulus’s bunny ears, “Merlin Reg, how much did
you have to drink? Your breath reeks of rum and firewhiskey.”

Regulus giggled, which was enough of an answer for James because Regulus never giggled, at
least not like this.

He stood up and dusted off his trousers, holding out his hand for Regulus to take, “Come on, Reg.
Let's get you to bed.”

Regulus let himself be pulled up but that doesn’t stop him from whining about it, “Jamieeee, I don't
want to go to bed.”

“What if it's my bed?”

Regulus looked to be contemplating that, before smiling and nodding, “Okay if it's your bed then
I'll go.”

James smirked and threw an arm around Regulus to help the stumbling fool up to the castle. The
entire way up he listened as Regulus tells him about a star that had just been discovered. James had
never been into astronomy but he couldn't help but be interested when Regulus seemed so
passionate explaining it.

It took way longer than he planned to get Regulus up the seven flights of stairs to the Gryffindor
common room. He made it up the first five with minimal complaints but the last two he simply
refused to climb. James ended up carrying him up the last two which Regulus seemed to both enjoy
and find emasculating at the same time.

When they got to the common room, James hoped beyond hope, that it was late enough for the
common room to be clear. When the portrait swung open, he realized, that luck was not on his
side. He rush Regulus through the common room and hoped that Reg’s costume would disguise
him from anyone that noticed them.

Once they finally got up to his dorm, he was relieved to see that Padfoot and Moony weren't there
yet, he already knew Peter wouldn't be there tonight. He did not want to have to deal with yet
another friend yelling at him about his relationship, tonight.

Regulus giggled and leaned against the closed door, “That was like a race, we got up here so
quick.”

“Well, I didn't figure you'd want anyone to see you coming up here.”

Regulus enthusiastically shook his head in response, “No, that would not be good.”

James smirked at Regulus and grabbed his hand, pulling him away from the door, “Okay, so let's
get you out of that costume and ready for bed shall we?”

Regulus frowned looking puzzled, “I thought that we couldn't take these off until midnight?”

James laughed and pointed towards the clock on their wall, “Yeah Reg, it's like one in the
morning. So that means everyone can take theirs of now.”

“Oh, it doesn't just disappear at midnight?”

“Nope, everyone has to take them off by themselves. That means you can keep those bunny ears.”

Regulus laughed and crossed his arms, “Yes, because I have a big need for two floppy ears in my
daily wardrobe.”
James smiles and touched one of the aforementioned ears, “I think they look cute on you.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Yeah I bet you do. That was a dirty trick making sure my costume was a
bunny by the way.”

James smirked at his boyfriend, “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

"Sure you don't. Okay, where is the bathroom so you can help me take this paint off.”

James showed him to the bathroom and helped him remove the ears, whiskers, and makeup until
he looked like Regulus again. He had looked absolutely adorable in his costume, but James still
preferred to see his handsome face bare of makeup. Then he had Regulus help him get his antlers
and paint off.

“I liked your costume by the way. I think a stag fits you well.”

James grinned at Regulus, who had no idea just how right he was, “Thank you, Reggie. I
appreciate that.”

James helped Regulus clean up and gave him some Gryffindor shorts and a sweatshirt to sleep in.
James loved seeing his last name splayed out Regulus’s back. Then he had Regulus drink a big
glass of water before they got in his bed for the night.

Once they were all settled in, James locked and silenced the curtains, just in case his roommates
tried to wake him in the morning. Regulus and he lay talking about anything and everything that
came to their minds. James was stuck with how amazing it felt to be so domestic with Regulus
tonight. How much he longed to spend every night with Regulus like this. What it would be like to
live in an apartment or house with Regulus.

He realized that more than anything he wanted others to know about his relationship with Regulus.
He wanted others to know that he had the most handsome boyfriend and that he was off-limits to
others. He wanted to be able to tell Regulus how much he means to him, without worrying that this
would all go away one day. He had no idea if Regulus would ever allow that to be a possibility but
James would try everything he could to have Regulus grow old with him.

James was drifting asleep when he heard Regulus speak, he had thought that Regulus had already
fallen asleep, but maybe Regulus thought the same thing because he said the last thing James ever
expected to hear at that moment, “I think I am falling in love with you, Jamie.”

It felt like a private moment for Regulus, that James shouldn't be listening in on, but he had said his
name. He had said that he loved James. Regulus Black loved James.

Peter had accused him of being in love with Regulus and Sirius had accused him of being in love
with his boyfriend, he had denied it both times. He hadn't allowed himself to consider that Regulus
and he could be in love, mostly because they hardly even considered themselves to be dating.
However, it wasn't until that moment, when he heard those words and his heartfelt lighter than it
had felt in weeks, that he knew. He had been in love with Regulus too, but was too scared to admit
it and make it real first.

Since Regulus had already made it real, James felt he needed to say it, whether Regulus was still
listening or not, “I love you too, Reggie.”

He turned to look at Regulus’s face, expecting the boy to have fallen asleep by now and be met
with closed eyes, he was shocked to meet a pair of wide eyes looking back at him, equally shocked.

They stared at each other for a moment, the air tense between them, each waiting for the other to
take back their sentiments, neither did. I

Regulus smiled at James. James smiled back.

 Pranks and Games
Chapter Notes

Okay, I am getting very excited about what's coming next for this fic. I have made
some decisions on events that will be happening coming up and I can not wait to see
how the chapters come out! Sorry about the longer wait on this chapter, I am applying
for an adult job so there was a bit of delay. Hope you all enjoy!

Regulus

James. James Potter. James Fleamont Potter. James F. Potter. Potter. Jamie. Mon nounours. Mon
amour.

Regulus was rapidly becoming obsessed with the egotistical git known as James Potter. In fact,
most of his thoughts these days were occupied with him. If Regulus had thought that their
confession to each other on Halloween wouldn't change a thing, he was dead wrong.

In reality, he hadn't really considered the consequences of the confession before he did it, which
probably had something to do with all the rum he had consumed. Regulus knew that he could've
used the fact that he was completely sloshed, as an excuse for confessing to James. Maybe he
would have if James hadn't felt the same way, but instead, the next morning when James asked him
if he had any regrets, he admitted that he had been thinking those words long before he said them.

As if that wasn't embarrassing enough, James had confessed that he hadn't even thought the words
until Regulus had voiced them. James had said that he wouldn't let himself consider the idea until
he was sure how Regulus felt, but that as soon as he heard those words he knew he felt the same.
Regulus could understand that caution, he didn't blame James for feeling unsure.

He had felt unsure almost every second of their relationship, that's right they were officially calling
it a relationship now. How could he not feel unsure about James and their future? Hell, he wasn't
even sure why James liked him or felt attracted to him at all, being as Regulus never saw anything,
particularly attractive about himself.

Still, though, James was incredible and he really could do better than Regulus. Regulus didn't mind
being selfish for a while and spending as much time with James as he could before James
inevitably realized he was too good for him. He knew that eventually, James would come to the
realization, and then Regulus would lose him.
The biggest reason that Regulus was so unsure of their relationship, before their mutual
confessions, of course, was because Regulus wasn't sure what love really felt like. It might sound
pathetic but Regulus had never really felt love in his life. The only one that he thought maybe came
close was Sirius, but Regulus isn't sure that that was ever really real. Even if it was, it was more out
of obligation than an actual fondness for Regulus.

Regulus’s parents may love him, but they certainly never showed him even a glimpse of that. He
respected his parents but he didn't think he really felt love for them. Then again he was never sure
how love was supposed to feel until James. He held a certain affection for his friends but it didn't
really come close to what he felt for James.

James had come into Regulus’ life like a freight train. He had plowed into Regulus’s life, his
thoughts, and as cringy as it might be to say it, his heart. When this year started, Regulus had felt
nothing but hate for James, like he had since the day Sirius first mentioned the boy when he was
ten. Every interaction they had made him burn with anger, probably a bit more passion than what
was normal for someone you dislike.

Then the incident in the locker room happened and all that passion and anger boiled into what it
truly was, at least for Regulus, lust. With every interaction, even right away when Regulus still
disliked James, that lust grew along with something else. Eventually, he started to see James as a
separate entity from his brother’s group, he started to mean more to him.

Regulus’s feelings had become stronger with every look, every kiss, and every story. Until he had
this weird bubbling feeling in his chest every time he saw James Potter. He had had no idea what
the feeling was when he had first felt it, as they had held hands in the Room of Requirement weeks
ago. He had tried to find the words to describe how he felt about James, but he was only able to
when his drunk mind took over.

When he heard those words leave his lips, he knew that was what the feeling had been all along,
love. Love for the only person in the world that made him feel safe when the world was falling
apart around them.

When James had said it back, Regulus had melted. His chest felt lighter than it had in years, he
finally knew that someone loved him.

After that things had changed. James and Regulus were acting as if they were in their own romance
novel, the ones Remy always suggested he read. Regulus found himself becoming much more
reckless in the wake of the confession. James and he would often find themselves smiling at each
other in crowded corridors, or even worse in the great hall. One time James had actually started
walking over to him in the courtyard before he realized there were eyes everywhere and changed
directions, towards a group of Ravenclaw quidditch players.

James and he met almost every night and the nights that they didn’t, Regulus found himself
longing to talk to James. That's why they had started sending each other notes throughout the day,
they were just lucky no one had intercepted their paper birds yet, though they did only ever use
initials. James made Regulus feel stupidly in love, even though he knew that their relationship was
risky he still sank into it wholeheartedly.

Both Remy and Barty knew that he was in a relationship with someone, they had promised not to
dig for further details. Regulus didn't see any harm in them thinking he was dating some random
Ravenclaw girl. James had told him that he shouldn't lie to his friends and say that it's a girl, but
Regulus waved that off, it would be too suspicious if Regulus didn't specify genders.

Regulus twirled the thin red leather strap around his wrist as he sat in the back corner of the library,
listening to James try to remember the ingredients in the Draught of Peace. They were at one of
their few scheduled tutoring sessions, where they actually studied. Once Regulus had gotten a
glimpse of James’s potions grade he was frankly appalled. He told James that there would be no
more snogging during their tutoring time until James got his Needs Improvement mark up to a
respectable Acceptable mark.

“Uhhh okay, so there are definitely porcupine quills and powdered monkshed.” James furrowed his
eyebrows in deep thought. He was trying so hard, Regulus felt a little bad knowing he would have
to tell him he mixed up the ingredients.

“It’s powdered moonstone. Powdered monkshed would bring it closer to the Draught of Living
Death than I think either of us is comfortable with.”

James frowned and groaned, leaning his head against the table in frustration, “Fuck Reg, I am
never going to remember this shit and then I am going to blow everyone up in our final exams.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’s dramatic declaration, he had clearly been spending too much
time with Sirius, “You don't even know that the Draught of Peace will be on your final exams.
While it's good information to know, I don't think you forgetting an ingredient is going to cause
anyone to blow up.”

James peaked at Regulus from behind his arms, that he was burying his face into, “You know I
might feel more motivated to learn if I had someone to snog me when I got an answer right.”
Regulus couldn't stop the smirk from forming on his face. James was always in the mood for a
good snog and Regulus appreciated his boyfriend’s eagerness, “Oh really?”

James sat up and leaned over the table towards Regulus, against his best judgment he found
himself leaning a bit closer as well, “Yeah, do you think Pete would be willing to join us and
motivate me?”

Regulus found his eyes widening at the thought of someone, Peter Pettigrew especially, snogging
James. The thought sickened Regulus and he felt he must do something, anything, to expunge it
from his memory. He quickly glanced around for prying eyes and when he only saw the
bookshelves surrounding them, he grabbed the back of James's head and yanked him in for a kiss.

It was short and a bit more brutal than necessary, Regulus felt a little ridiculous to admit that he
was claiming James a little with that kiss. They both leaned back from the kiss, panting as Regulus
gritted out, “Never joke about kissing someone else in front of me.”

Then Regulus released them and they both leaned back into their seats, James grinned at him.
Regulus had thought James might be upset with Regulus manhandling him as he had, but James
seemed to be enjoying that side of Regulus. Which was a very curious deduction.

“Hey, James! Regulus.” Regulus jumped so hard at the sound, he fell out of his seat. Where the
fuck had Remus Lupin come from? How long had he been in there?

James seemed to get a hold of his surprise quicker than Regulus had because by the time Regulus
pulled himself back into his seat the boys were greeting each other naturally. Meanwhile, Regulus
was absolutely freaking out. How fucking dumb could he possibly have been, kissing James in
public like that? Even if Lupin hadn't seen, which by his nonchalant behavior he probably hadn't,
anyone else could've peeked around the bookshelves to see and then he’d be ruined. He needed to
start being smarter around James or he’d have a short life, as his mother would murder him.

“How’s the tutoring session going?”

James, who was surprisingly doing really well at pretending nothing was happening a minute ago,
groaned in frustration at the thought of potions, “I bloody hate it, Moony. I can't remember any of
this crap and Regulus is unsympathetic.”
Regulus, trying for his own brand of nonchalance, began looking at his nails attempting to look his
usual level of poshness, without the current level of anxiety, “I can't help it that you have the brain
the size of a thimble, Potter.”

James’ head snapped up at the use of his surname. Regulus knew why, he hadn't called James by
his last name in almost a month, “Oh come of Reggie, don't put on a show for Moony. You were
just telling me that if I had the proper motivation I could be getting top marks.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, trying not to think about the way his stomach clenched at the thought of
the motivation James wanted, as he drawled sardonically, “Yes, Potter. You are right, that is
exactly what I was just saying. Right after you mistook an ingredient from the Draught of Living
Death for an ingredient in the Draught of Peace.”

Remus laughed, slapping James lightly on the back, before asking, “Really Prongs?”

James nodded, not looking quite so smug any longer. He turned to his friend, looking a bit
embarrassed, “Did you need anything, Moony?”

Remus looked surprised by the question, definitely not expecting James to seem eager to dismiss
him. Regulus was sure, James was the type to welcome his friend's interruptions during his
studying, so he understood Regulus’s confusion. “Uh no, I was just going to check in. But uh yeah I
should probably go, I am supposed to meet Padfoot.”

James nodded and the two friends said their goodbyes. As Remus was about to slip around the
corner of the bookshelf he looked back at the two boys with an odd contemplative expression on
his face.

As they were finally left alone, Regulus turned to James with a questioning look, “What do your
nicknames mean?”

James turned to him, looking confused at Regulus’s new line of questioning, before asking,
“What?”

“Your nicknames. Remus called you Prongs and you called him Moony, plus you mentioned a
Padfoot. Which by the way are ridiculous names.”
James grinned, his eyes flashing with the mischief that was common whenever James mentioned
his friends and their pranks. His voice took on a teasing tone, drawling, “Well now I couldn't tell
you all my secrets, Reggie. Otherwise, you might get the wrong idea about me.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at James’ ridiculous teasing, “And what idea would that be, pray tell?”

James’ eyes twinkled in mischief, as his lips curled into a smirk, “The idea that you can use my
love for you to get anything you want from me.”

Regulus struggled to control the blush rising to his cheeks. Since they had said it the first time,
James has taken to saying those words in the most nonchalant manner, which drove Regulus wild.
He had never been loved by anyone but James certainly made up for it, with the number of times
he told Regulus that he loved him every time they saw each other.

Regulus decided to tease James a little back, he leaned a bit closer to James and gave him his best
attempt at bedroom eyes, “Cant I?”

As ridiculous as Regulus felt while making eyes at James, they must've worked as James groaned,
his eyes filling with lust, “You drive me absolutely mad Regulus Black.”

Regulus smirked at him, “Then why don't you tell me about those nicknames, if I drive you so
mad?”

James’s eyes cleared a bit as he realized that Regulus was once again trying to bribe him into
telling him his secrets. Regulus was not the type to not get the answers he required. James ran his
fingers through his hair, making an even bigger mess of his dark locks, “You really are persistent.
Okay like I said I can't tell you why we have the nicknames as it's a bit of a Marauder's secret, that
even you can't get out of me.”

Regulus opened his mouth to mock the absolute ridiculousness of their nicknames being “a
Marauder’s secret” when James continued, “However given that you are so curious, I suppose it
wouldn't hurt for me to tell that, I am Prongs after a stag, Padfoot is Sirius after a dog, and Peter is
Wormtail after a rat.”

Regulus at the absolute ridiculousness of the nicknames and how James really hadn’t told him
anything, “Ugh Wormtail, really? That’s a disgusting nickname, why on earth would you guys
choose that? And I suppose Lupin is Moony because….” Regulus didn’t finish his sentence but
gave James a meaningful look, which the boy seemed to understand.

James nodded seriously before answering Regulus’ previous question, “Hey, what can we do about
Peter's nickname? He's a rat.”

Regulus could see the amusement in James' eyes as he spoke and he immediately understood that it
was another Marauders joke, “Literally or figuratively?”

James smiled, but shook his head, “No more questions about the nicknames, Bunny. I've told you
all I can.”

Regulus groaned at the ridiculous nickname, he had acquired. Weird that they were all animal
names, “Ugh, I really wish you'd stop calling me Bunny. It's actually worse than Reggie.”

James fixed him with a knowing stare, smirking, “You love when I call you Reggie.”

“No, I tolerate you calling me Reggie. I used to want to legitimately stab you in the face when you
called me that and I still will if anyone but you or Sirius calls me that.”

James smiled and Regulus didn’t know when exactly he had realized that James had the most
charming smile he had ever seen, but he was sure of it now. He decided to change the subject in an
attempt to slow the fluttering in his stomach, “Narcissa wrote me a letter.”

James furrowed his eyebrows in confusion from the sudden change of topic, “Oh?”

“She and Lucious Malfoy are officially engaged and will be married this summer.”

James looked unsure of how to respond, but gave a hesitant smile, “Oh wow. I mean I guess it's not
really a surprise, they dated through school didn’t they?”

“Yes, but I never thought she’d actually settle down with a Malfoy, I guess. It's stupid but I always
thought she was too intelligent for that.”

James suddenly looked more interested, though Regulus had no idea why, “That’s not stupid, Reg.
I am sure she is too intelligent for Malfoy but is that really why you're surprised?”

Regulus took a deep breath before speaking slowly, hesitant, “I don’t know how much Sirius has
told you about our cousins.”

James shook his head, “Not a whole lot, except that Bellatrix is insane, Narcissa is bitchy, and that
Andromedas cool.”

Regulus let out a scoff, rolling his eyes, “Of course, that’s all he told you. Sirius and I grew up very
lonely children. We only had each other for playmates, as our mother would say that our muggle
neighbors were not worth the air we breathed. We loved spending time with each other, but when
our cousins would come to visit we would hardly speak to each other. We were so desperate for
communication with the outside world. Bella, as Sirius so eloquently put, has always been a bit
mad, but she wasn't always cruel. She was the oldest so when we were younger she was in charge
of us when our parents would be out. She used to make up these games that we would all play as
soon as our parents would leave as they were too improper for us to play otherwise.”

James’s eyes were wide as he blurted out, “Bellatrix Lestrange did that?”

Regulus couldn't blame James for his surprise, given how Bellatrix was now, “That was when she
was Bellatrix Black and before she developed a habit for cruelty. Anyways as we got older she
spent less time with Sirius and me when they visited, so we usually spent time without our
respective favorite cousins. Sirius always favored Drom while I favored Sissy. Sissy and I would
spend hours chatting and drawing whatever caught our fancy. The point is that I know her James. I
know what kind of person she is and I know what kind of person Lucious Malfoy is, he will not
make him happy.”

“You're sure of this? They always seemed quite smitten with each other when I saw them together
in school.”

Regulus glared at his boyfriend, “Attraction is not the same as love James.”

James spoke slowly, clearly worried Regulus would snap at him, “I am quite aware of that, Bunny.
It's very important to have both, have you tried writing to her?”

Regulus furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “About what?”

James leveled him with a knowing stare, “About why you don’t think she and Lucious aren’t right
for each other.”

“What good would that do?”

“What do you mean?”

Regulus sighed, not really wanting to get into pure-blood traditions, that James should already be
aware of, “Well the engagement is already finalized, they are getting married. My objections
would only cause Narcissa undue stress.”

“No, I think it's important to help your cousin if you feel she is making a poor mistake.”

“This is ridiculous. It's none of my business.”

Now it was James’s turn to roll his eyes at Regulus, “Maybe not, but what's the worst that could
happen. She tells Lucious that you don't like him, big deal.”

Regulus pondered that thought and realized that he didn't really much care if Lucious liked him or
not, “Maybe I will.”

James smiled at him brightly, seemingly thrilled that Regulus was listening to his advice. Regulus
rolled his eyes at James, but couldn't help the smile that was fighting for a place on his face,
“Alright now that you've got your kiss, you should be properly motivated to tell me the ingredients
in Polyjuice potion.”

James pouted, which looked ridiculous on his sixteen-year-old face, “What? No! Moony
interrupted us, that's not fair.”

Regulus crossed his arms over his chest, raising one eyebrow, “You said a kiss would motivate
you, I gave you a kiss. It's certainly not my fault that your friends and you have some weird
codependency where you can handle not seeing each other every hour of the day.”

James chuckled and winked at Regulus, “What can I say I love those nosey gits.”
Regulus was well aware of that. Lately, James and he had become more open in the topics they
discussed. James often talked about his friends, including Sirius, and Regulus tried with all his
might not to look uncomfortable at the mention of his estranged brother. He knew that James’s
friends were very important to him and he wanted him to be able to discuss it with Regulus, even if
he still hated hearing about Sirius.

Regulus had begun discussing his family a bit more as well, even though he knew full well what
James thought about them. He tried to avoid topics of punishment or reprimand, in regards to his
mother, but it was hard to find much else to mention of her.

Regulus found he enjoyed this newfound openness the two of them shared, even if sometimes it
involved uncomfortable topics, he always wanted to know more about James.

****************************************************************************************

Regulus

“So, this is the Gryffindor common room?” Regulus questioned James, who looked a bit nervous.

He supposed he had been in this room before, when James had brought him to his dorm after the
Halloween party. A fact that still confused Regulus, as the Room of Requirement wasn't much
farther and would've been a hell of a lot less risky. However, he hadn't actually got a good look
around the room with James dragging him up the stairs as quickly as possible.

The walls were various shades of red and were covered in tapestries depicting famous witches and
wizards. There was a large fireplace with a portrait of a lion hanging above it, in all its majestic
glory. The entire room was a spacious circle and there were large, comfortable-looking armchairs
everywhere. There were tables, where Regulus was sure many people would be inhabiting to study
had it not been dinner time. Overall Regulus thought that there was far too much red to be found in
the room, but it did look much more comfortable than Slytherin's common room.

James sighed heavily, and Regulus was sure he regretted agreeing to this prank already, shoving
his hands in his pockets, “Yep this is it, home sweet home.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, annoyed at James’ lack of enthusiasm, “Are you seriously going to be butt-
hurt about pranking your own house the entire time, or are you actually going to get over yourself
and help me?”
James glared at Regulus, “I am not butt hurt about pranking my house.”

Regulus crossed his arms, arching an eyebrow, “Please, then why are you moping around like that?
You were perfectly fine when we were planning the prank.”

That much was true. James had been practically giddy while they were planning the prank, so
Regulus assumed he’d be unbearably enthusiastic the actual day of the prank. Instead, he was
acting like a kicked crup, “I guess it's because it feels weird without Sirius here. Every prank either
of us has pulled since we were in first year, the other one was always somehow involved. Even
when Wormy and Moony didn't want to join in, Sirius and I have always been partners.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, getting annoyed at the mention of his brother, “Merlin, James. Are you
partners or lovers? I mean you're acting as if you are cheating on him or something. It's just a
fucking prank.”

James glared at Regulus in annoyance, “I practically am cheating on him by performing a prank

with you. He would be devastated.”

“You are so dramatic, maybe even worse than Sirius.”

“Regulus I am not even kidding when I say that I think Sirius would be more upset with me for
pulling a prank with you than if he found out I was shagging you.”

Regulus raised an eyebrow in disbelief, but James continued to stare at him seriously, so Regulus
thought it could possibly be true. Regulus lowered his tone, to a husky whisper and stepped closer
to James, “Okay fine. So, you would rather be pulling this prank with Sirius, but then what would
you rather do with me?””

James looked a bit surprised at the question, but stepped closer to Regulus grabbing his hips,
letting his lips drag on his boyfriend's neck, “You, I would prefer at my side.” He kissed Regulus’
neck, “I’d prefer to have you in my bed.” He kissed his cheek, “I’d prefer to have you in my arms.”
Lastly, he kissed his lips, “And I definitely would prefer having you on my prick.”

Regulus pulled back, rolling his eyes at James’s horniness. He spoke in an imperious tone, stepping
away from James, “Well, if you ever want me in any of those places, specifically the last one, then
you'll get your shit together and pull this prank with me.”
James’s eyes widened in surprise and he gaped. After a second he grinned, his eyes filling with
lust, “God you are a cruel man. I fucking love you.”

Regulus smirked, enjoying the fact that his boyfriend seemed to take pleasure in his more
vindictive moments, “Great. Then start charming everything on that half of the common room
while I do this half.”

Together they set about to charming all smaller items in the room, avoiding anything too large, that
could turn their joke into a disaster. Once they had charmed everything Regulus needed to check
how much time they had before people poured into the common room, “Hey Jamie, will you check
your map?”

James had shown Regulus the Marauders map while they were preparing for their prank. Regulus
had been shocked that James and his friends were even more pompous than he thought. The fact
that they had their own group name was bad enough, but they actually named one of the most
impressive student-made pieces of magic to enter this school after their group, ridiculous. Then he
was horrified that James would always be able to see where he was, even worse, Sirius could
always see where he was. Lastly, he felt annoyed that his brother got away with way more stuff
than he should have because of this map and James’s invisibility cloak.

James walked over and looked down at the map that he had spread out on one of the tables in the
common room, “Yeah, no one is near yet but it looks like a few people are leaving the Great Hall.”

Regulus pouted a bit, then felt ridiculous for it, his mother would be furious if she saw him doing
it, “Damn. I really wish I could see the look on their faces, especially Sirius’. “

James smiled at him, apparently, his bad mood had passed now that they had performed the work
of the prank and the results were near, “I know, Bunny. But unfortunately, you refuse to let anyone
know about us.”

James had been bothering Regulus about telling people that they were dating for weeks. Regulus
had told him time and time again that they absolutely couldn't tell anyone, but he kept bringing it
up anyways. The first time he brought it up, they had actually got in a screaming match over it,
until James pushed him up against the wall, and then they were snogging. Regulus knew James’
reason for wanting to tell people and James knew Regulus’ reasons for not wanting people to
know, so they were effectively at a stalemate.

Regulus rolled his eyes but decided not to comment, “I know I’ll go but promise me to tell me
absolutely everything later, please.”
James smiled and pulled Regulus in for a deep kiss, before pulling back and slapping Regulus on
the ass lightly, “All right I promise. Now go, before I get the urge to throw you over my shoulder
and ravish you in my bed.”

Regulus laughed and waved goodbye before heading out of the portrait. It was a good thing he left
when he did because he passed a group of Gryffindors on the sixth floor and they only looked
mildly confused to see a Slytherin on this level after dinner.

The real kicker was when he was on the fifth floor and ran into a group of Gryffindors that seemed
a little too rambunctious to really notice him, but he noticed them. Sirius was there talking to a
pretty girl with dark skin and dark curly hair, they were laughing loudly in a way that annoyed
Regulus instantly. James’s other friends were there too along with some other girls, including Lily
Evans.

He scowled at her before his eyes landed on Lupin, who was staring right back at him. He didn't
say anything but Regulus quickened his step suddenly eager to be as far away from the Gryffindor
common room and the chaos that would soon unfold as soon as possible.

******************************************************************************************

Remus

Sneaking around with someone like Sirius Black was not easy. Remus and he had been dating for
less than a month and they had already almost been caught four times. One time Sirius forgot to
spell the curtains shut and James just about burst in, until Peter had asked for his help with
something. Another time during lunch Sirius had his hand on Remus’s thigh under the table and
Marlene had dropped her fork and was about to lean down and grab it, until Peter gave her his
instead. The other two times ended similarly with Peter unknowingly being their saving grace. He
made a mental note to get Peter an extra special Christmas gift this year.

Sirius seemed bent on touching Remus constantly, in the worst possible moments. If Remus didn't
know any better he’d think Sirius wanted them to get caught, but he knew that wasn't true as Sirius
was the one who chose for them to keep it a secret. Remus, who had been out of the closet for over
a year, had no right to tell Sirius when to leave the closet himself, but he wished he could kiss
Sirius without being afraid of getting caught. He wished he could kiss him and not feel like he was
lying to his friends.
He supposed he shouldn’t feel that guilty, James had been lying to them for months about his
boyfriend. Remus knew that he shouldn't be as curious as he was about James’ boyfriend, seeing as
he was in the relationship of his dreams, but he couldn't help himself.

Things with James’s relationship just didn't add up. Here's what he knew about the boy: Bunny
spoke French, supposedly better than Sirius who sounded amazing, speaking French. Their
relationship had started from an argument. They had sex after James came to him for advice. Then
there were the bunny ears he saw on the bathroom sink the morning after Halloween, though there
was no boyfriend attached to them. James said his Bunny didn't want to be out in public, yet the
two of them met every single night James now called him his boyfriend.

He felt like he knew who James’s Bunny was, but couldn't quite picture him. It was like when a
word is on the tip of one's tongue, but one just can't process it. He felt like he had all the pieces to
the puzzle but no answers. It was incredibly frustrating, then there was Peter who clenched up
every time James’ boyfriend was mentioned. It was all just so confusing.

Remus was in a group of his friends heading back up to the common room, after a particularly
filling dinner. Marlene repeated the password to the fat lady and the group piled into the room.
They weren't the first ones back, but they were back before most of the house. When they got there,
a group of students including James, who Remus thought was sick, crowded around one of the
tables.

Sirius called out to James, obnoxiously loud, while plopping down on an armchair, “Oi Prongs!
What's going on?”

James turned to him, with a confounded facial expression, “I don't know. I came down here for my
book I left and these guys were down here staring at this pencil.”

Lily, the prefect that she is, stepped forward immediately, “What's going on here?”

One of the students, whom Remus couldn't quite recognize, answered, “I don't know. I grabbed this
pencil and another one just appeared.”

Marlene groaned, marching up to the table, “Oh this is ridiculous. It didn't multiply by itself.”

She grabbed both of the pencils and then let out a shriek, as two more pencils seemed to pop out of
the pencils she held. At the same time, Sirius had grabbed one of the throw pillows of the floor,
probably to throw at the group, when that multiplied too, “What the bloody hell is going on?”

Suddenly the portrait opened and multitudes of first and second years poured in and it was
immediate chaos. They began grabbing books that they had left in there, games that they had been
playing, and pillows to sit on, which all started multiplying in their hands.

In minutes the common room was enveloped in the sounds of screaming, yelling from the original
group to stop grabbing things, and the sounds of multiplying. The room was starting to fill up too.
The ground was covered in books, papers, chessboards, and pillows. The mess was already
reaching his knees, which meant that soon enough some of the first years would be completely
trapped.

Lily looked at him in panic and he knew why. She was a prefect and obviously had been trying to
get people to calm down, but she wasn't tall or loud enough to get their attention. He groaned and
cursed his height, before yelling as loud as he could, “Hey, everyone shut up and drop whatever
you're holding!”

Luckily he was heard throughout the room and everyone seemed to have dropped what they were
holding, but since everyone was now touching things with their legs the sounds of multiplying
were still heard, “Okay everyone proceed carefully to the door and exit! Don't touch anything more
than you need to! Whoever is out first, go find professor McGonagall!”

Everyone immediately began filing out, a little more panic-like than he would have preferred, but
he understood. He stood up on a table along with James, while Sirius and Peter were standing on
the tops of the armchairs, while everyone filed out. Lily mumbled something about explaining
things to McGonagall before shuffling away through the mess.

Once everyone was out, and the room was finally silent, they all looked at each other until Remus
spoke, “Okay which one of you did it?”

All three of them denied it, but Remus couldn't help but be suspicious since there wasn't anyone
else in the school that were as into pranks as them. Luckily before he began accusing his best
friends McGonagall came in.

She looked shocked but carefully avoided stepping into the mess, so Lily must have let her know
the situation, “I sent everyone down to the great hall for hot chocolate, which gives me plenty of
time to ask you, what you were thinking?”
Sirius gasped, “Wait, we didn't do this Minnie. For once we are actually innocent.”

The other boys nodded their agreements, but she looked suspicious, “Then why are you boys the
only ones left in here?”

James spoke first, breaking his unusual silence, “Remus was taking charge and getting everyone
out. We wanted to be there for moral support.”

Sirius scoffed, “Speak for yourself, I wanted to know who the hell managed to pull a prank on us.”

Professor McGonagall looked a bit more believing at Sirius’s petulant tone, “And did you find
anything out.”

Sirius crossed his arms, grumbling, “No.”

“Okay well since you boys are here, I’ll need some help clearing this all up.”

They nodded and as soon as Professor McGonagall pulled out her wand Peter asked, “What is this
charm and how are you going to reverse it?”

She leveled Peter with an unimpressed look, and Remus got the impression that she still didn’t
quite believe that they had nothing to do with this, “This charm is a doubling charm, it doubles
everything to near perfection. The incantation for it is Gemino. It traditionally can only be undone
by the original caster, but since we don't know who that is we will have to try something else. I
need all of you to ready your wands and together we are going to repeat Gemino Touchera with a
circular motion. All of our focus together should be enough to stop the curse.”

Together they all raised their wands and repeated the incantation, moving their wands in a circular
direction. They all stood waiting to see if anything happened, nobody seemed willing to step into
the mess, that was taking over the common room. That is until Sirius gave Peter a shove and he fell
into the pile. He stood up fast shouting at Sirius before he realized that nothing was multiplying,
“Shit it worked. Oh sorry, professor.”

She gave Peter one final glare before raising her wand and vanishing the doubles, leaving only the
original objects behind, “Alright, well now that, that is taken care of we should let the rest of
Gryffindor get to bed.”

The Marauders all hopped off their respective shelters and met in the middle of the room. Sirius
watched professor McGonagall beckon the rest of the students into the room, “Damn, that woman
never ceases to impress me.”

James elbowed him in the ribs, snorting, “Your odd crush on Minnie never ceases to amaze me.”

Sirius pulled James into a headlock and soon the boys were engaged in a weird wrestling match,
while most of the house were trying their hardest to get out of the cursed common room and up to
their dormitories.

Lily, Marlene, and Mary seemed to be the only students not rushing up the stairs. Mary threw an
arm around Peter's shoulder, “So boys, I'm guessing that had your names all over it.”

Marlene snorted, plopping down on an armchair, “What did McGonagall give you? Two weeks or
two days.”

Peter shrugged off Mary's arm and attempted to glare at her, but Peter never really could stay mad
at his gossip buddy, “Nothing, because we didn't do it.”

Lily rolled her eyes, clearly not believing it, “Come on, there is no way you guys didn't do that
prank.”

Sirius and James, who had stopped fighting, joined the conversation with their arms thrown around
each other. Sirius’s voice was dripping with sarcasm as he responded, “Yeah Evans, because we
are totally known for pranking our own house. Get off your high horse.”

Lily glared at Sirius, fuming, but didn't bother with a response. Remus wasn't sure why, but Sirius
and Lily had never gotten along very well. Remus always had a sneaky suspicion that Sirius
disliked the fact that she always turned James down. Now that James had a boyfriend and she
hadn't had to turn him down in months, he realized that couldn't have been the reason. He made a
mental note to ask Sirius about it when they were alone later.

The two of them had been sleeping in each other's bed, practically every night, or at least every
night they could get away with it. They were lucky that James and Peter were so enamored in their
own love lives, that they didn't seem to notice their shared lustful stares.

Remus was well aware that his relationship with Sirius had moved faster than any relationship he’d
ever had. The way he saw it, he had five years of fourplay before they actually got together to
make up for. Sirius was fucking magic in bed, literally and figuratively. Remus had never felt the
way he did with Sirius, with anyone else, not even for a second. Sirius was made for him and he
was made for Sirius, not that he’d ever say those words to Sirius.

Sirius absolutely loved flirting and compliments. Remus had always known that Sirius had this
proclivity, but he had never had the boy's attention completely focused on him before. Or at least
almost completely focused on him, as he still flirted with James a bit. Remus knew that he would
just have to get used to sharing his boyfriend with another man, luckily he adores James Potter.

Remus was shaken out of his thoughts when James slapped a hand down on Remus’s shoulder.
Apparently, the group had moved on to discussing some game that Peter's mom had sent him from
a prank shop by their house. It was a game that was supposed to be like truth or dare, except if you
chose truth you had to take a truth mint that wouldn't allow you to lie. It lasted for approximately
fifteen seconds and if you chose dare but chickened out you automatically had to take a truth mint.

The group decided that it would be a really good idea to play the game, while the common room
was empty, which was a rare occasion. Remus couldn't help but think about how bad this could go
for him, and Sirius. Unfortunately, Sirius seemed to have completely forgotten that he was keeping
a secret from his friends, because when Remus tried to catch his eye Sirius showed no signs of
weariness.

They got the game set up around the armchairs and they all sat in a circle, trying to decide who
should go first. It was decided that Peter should be the first one to ask, as it was his game and he
chose to ask Mary.

“Mary, truth or dare?”

She pretended to think about it before picking dare, which prompted Peter to dare her to charm her
hair blue for the rest of the game, which she did with a minor complaint. She chose to ask Lily,
who picked truth, and took a mint, “Why do you really like being a prefect?”

Lily answered automatically already flushing in anticipation for her answer, “I like telling people
what to do, especially the pureblood arseholes.”
Everyone laughed at that answer, not totally surprised that she didn't have a completely innocent
reason for liking being a prefect. Lily then chose to ask Sirius and he chose dare, which Remus was
very glad for, and he was promptly dared to perform the tickling charm on himself.

The game went on and nothing scandalous was revealed and no pranks that were too out of hand
were proposed. In fact, Remus almost thought that he had been overreacting until Sirius asked
James a truth, laughing the entire time, “So Jamie boy, if you could snog one person without
consequences in front of the school who would it be?”

Remus could tell that James was fighting everything in his body not to answer this question and
that meant one of two things, either someone in this circle wasn't going to like this answer or he
was about to spill a gigantic secret.

“Regulus Black.”

Or maybe it would be both. Chaos erupted immediately as the words registered to the group. Sirius
was fuming and kept asking James what he had just said to him. Lily was silent but looked
miserable. Mary and Marlene were asking James to go into more detail. James was still in shock at
what he had just said. Remus didn't even have time to see Peter's reaction before he spoke over
everyone, in a mock frustrated voice, “James! Come on you weren't supposed to say it so quickly,
you were supposed to make them sweat a bit.”

This caused everyone to turn to Peter with confused and shocked expressions, before Sirius slowly
asked, “What?”

Peter rolled his eyes as if it was obvious, “He didn't actually take a truth mint. He switched it with
a regular mint, we wanted to see what you guys would do if he answered with the last person
anyone would think of. He was supposed to make the suspense build a little first, though.”

James’s eyes were wide but he started laughing and so did Pete, “Yeah, sorry mate I couldn't help
it It was too good of a joke.”

The girls relaxed after hearing that, but Lily still looked a bit uncomfortable. Sirius still seemed
confused before he forced out a laugh, “Alright boys I'll give you that one, but maybe let's not use
my brother in any more jokes. You'll give me a heart attack, honestly.”

James faked a smile and the game continued around them, for everyone except Remus, because he
knew. James could laugh and pretend all he wanted, but Remus knew when Peter was lying. His
left eyebrow always twitched when he lied and Peter had just lied to them. James had taken a truth
mint, which meant he had been telling the truth.

That was the part that was hard to understand. James wanted to kiss Regulus Black, in front of the
school if there were no consequences more than anyone else? Suddenly images were flashing in his
head: the way James and Regulus had jolted away from each other in the library and Regulus had
fallen from his chair. The green leather band around James’s wrist. Regulus up near the Gryffindor
common room even though he lived in the dungeons, and James skipping dinner. The bunny ears
Remus found in the room, even though the only bunny costume he had seen was worn by none
other than Regulus Black. The French. The reluctance to come out.

Everything was coming together in such a cumulation of pieces that instantly made the puzzle
whole. He felt proud of his discovery for all of two seconds before he felt sick to his stomach,
because Bunny was Regulus Black.

The Bunny that James was… in love with? Was Sirius’ estranged brother, that he was convinced
was going to become a death eater. James, loyal and wonderful James had been shagging Sirius’s
brother behind everyone's back. Though maybe it wasn't behind everyone's back, because the only
reason Peter would've lied for James, is if he knew.

So what, Peter knew and now Remus knew, but when did James plan on telling Sirius? Remus was
well aware that this was a disaster waiting to happen, but he refused to let Sirius sit in the dark
while everyone else knew. Now that didn't mean he would tell him, even though his boyfriend's
urges were telling him to. He knew he had to give James a chance first because really he owed
James that, and more.

He was thrust out of his thoughts when he heard someone enter the room, he turned around, as did
everyone else in the group as Dorcas entered the room. She was wearing tiny shorts and a long t-
shirt, it was definitely an odd look to be sporting while visiting a different house common room.
Actually, now that Remus thought about it, it was rather late for her to be up here, especially since
no one sent her a note about the game.

Mary was the first one to ask Dorcas, “What are you doing here?”

Dorcas’s eyes were wide and she looked extremely taken off guard to see all of her friends gathered
in the common room. He figured someone must have given her the password, but he didn't really
care because it was Dorcas, and he was no longer prefect, it wasn't his job to care.

Before Dorcas could say anything, a voice was heard from behind him, “She’s here to sleep with
me, like she does every night.”
Remus, along with everyone else slowly turned back to Marlene who looked to be covering her
mouth in disbelief that she had just said that. That's when Remus glanced down to the box of mints
in her hand. It must have been her turn when Dorcas walked in, and the mints still were in effect so
she answered.

That begged the question of why Marlene and Dorcas spent every night together. Remus didn't
have to wait long for the answer when Dorcas stepped forward and pulled Marlene up so that they
were standing above everyone, “It's okay Marly. While this isn't exactly the moment I wanted to
tell everyone, I think it's for the best that we are honest.”

By that time Remus, along with a few others were gathering what was happening. Lily, Peter, and
Mary understood for sure, by their shocked and understanding expressions. Remus stole a quick
glance at Sirius, who still looked perplexed as Marlene asked, “Are you sure?”

When Dorcas nodded, the two looked back at their friends. Marlene took a deep breath before
speaking, “Okay, um I am really sorry that this had to come out that way. I swear we were going to
tell you all under a better circumstance. But the reason Dorcas sleeps with me every night is
because we are dating and have been for quite some time. We are in love and very happy. Peter
also knew about us.”

Boom. bomb dropped, at least for those who hadn't gathered that assumption right away. James
looked shocked but not upset, obviously. Sirius looked….. Happy? Remus didn't know what kind
of reaction he expected from Sirius, possibly anger, but it was not this.

Sirius was the first one to react, as he hopped up from the couch and threw his arms around them
both. They looked taken back at first but soon accepted it. Everyone in the circle came and gave
their support and hugs to the two girls. Marlene looked on the verge of tears, "Thank you. Thank
you guys so much. We were so scared to come forward with this.”

Mary spoke next, and Remus really should've been watching her reaction the entire time,
considering she was Marlene's best friend. If anyone's reaction to all this would be comparable to
his friend's reaction when Sirius and he eventually came out, it would be her. “Of course, we are
happy for you, you dolt. You should've known that, there is absolutely nothing you could do that
would make me love you any less.”

The two girls shared another hug, this time Remus definitely saw tears. It was a very touching
moment and it gave Remus hope for when Sirius and he went through this. Then Mary leaned back
and asked, “How did Pete find out?”
Peter groaned and Dorcas and Marlene laughed loudly.

The girls told the story about Peter walking in on them while they were having sex, which made
Remus grateful he wasn't Peter, though to be fair Peter was at least straight. Everyone decided to go
to bed shortly after all the excitement and soon Remus found himself in bed with Sirius, after they
were sure Peter and James were asleep.

Sirius knew he had to ask or it would drive him absolutely crazy, “How do you feel about Dorcas
and Marlene?”

Sirius looked at him funnily, as if the question was confusing, “Brilliant. I love them both and I am
glad they found each other.”

Remus hesitated before asking again, “But you aren't like a little jealous. I know you loved
Marlene.”

Sirius sighed and turned to face Remus, looking into his eyes with a deep soulful stare, “I do love
Marlene, that's why I know she finally found someone she felt right with. We always knew that we
weren't meant for each other and I think that we might have both finally found our true matches.”

Remus blushed, despite his best efforts, and he couldn’t help but tease Sirius, “True match? Wow,
the words you say after dating someone for only a month.”

Sirius smiled slightly at him, pausing a minute before saying, “We might have only been dating for
a month but we have been best friends for years. You know me better than almost anyone and you
make me so happy, which I haven't always had in my life. I love you, Remus Lupin.”

Remus’s eyes widened, never expecting to hear those words from Sirius. He had been in love with
Sirius for so long and to finally have him love him back, made Remus feel giddy, “I love you too,
Sirius Black.”

The two of them shared a deep kiss before they fell asleep in each other's embrace. Remus didn't
spare much more thought towards Regulus and James, how could he after what Sirius just told
him? He did have one thought though, that he would do anything to protect the man in his arms.
 Pinky Promise?
Chapter Notes

I can not tell you guys how much I am loving Peter right now. I swear every chapter I
write, I like his character development even more. The next chapter will be a
Christmas chapter, which I am very excited about. I hope everyone enjoys this
chapter!

Regulus

Dearest Narcissa,

Hello favorite cousin of mine, how have you been? I am so sorry I have been lacking in my
correspondence as of late. Are you quite well? I miss you dearly and I hope to see you during the
Christmas season. If you remember in our last letters, I was very focused on studying for my
OWL’s, but that has slowed dramatically. Please do not tell my mother or father this, but certain
members of the staff were concerned for my wellbeing and have strong-armed me into cutting
back. A completely ridiculous idea, if you ask me, but they never asked me. Actually, they asked
Sirius, which is completely absurd considering they are aware of his disownment from our family.
He gave them permission to keep me on a schedule, the fucking prat. Also, I made a new friend and
I have cut all my ties with Evan Rosier, if you can believe it. He was becoming poisonous to me
and I really should have ended the friendship earlier. Oh dear, I seem to have gone off on a bit of a
tangent, we really must write more to avoid this, Cissy darling. The intended purpose of this letter
is of a more sensitive nature and I believe it might upset you. I am sorry if this causes you any
undue stress but as your family, I feel it is my obligation to voice this concern. Lucius Malfoy is his
own form of poison and he will not make you happy. He is much too cruel and prideful to ever be a
good husband to you, and you deserve to be happy. I wish you would reconsider this marriage for
your own sake and for the sake of any children you would produce. He does not seem the type to be
a good father. I believe that if you came to uncle Cygnus with this request, he would grant it. Again
I am so sorry if this letter upsets you, but I care too deeply about you to let you go through with
this, without voicing my concerns.

R.A.B.

Andromeda Tonks,
You are no doubt surprised to be receiving a letter from me. I am surprised to be writing it myself,
but after deep reflection, I believe you are the only one who can help me. It's about the impending
marriage of Narcissa Black and Lucius Malfoy. I am aware that you have no contact with your
sister any longer, but I was hoping you would offer me advice. I have written to Cissy and
expressed my concerns over the marriage but I have major doubts that she will listen. Lucius
Malfoy is not a good person and he will ruin Narcissa’s life. I want to try to save her from a
terrible marriage but I am not sure my words will be enough. No one knows Narcissa better than
you, do you have any advice to make her understand? I am hoping you do.

Drom, I also want to express how upsetting and distasteful I found the way our family handled
your exile. I hope you and your family are very well. If you were wondering, I am also doing very
well. Thank you for reading my letter and hopefully, you will have some advice for me.

R.A.B.

“This is the best present ever!” James exclaimed excitedly as Regulus and he held hands walking
through Hogsmeade.

Regulus smiled at him, or well whoever's face he was wearing, smiled at him. Regulus had come
up with the idea for James’s present after their last argument. James had been bugging him since
Halloween for them to at least tell their friends about their relationship, as he wanted more than
anything for people to know about them.

He had spent weeks researching glamors and disguising potions in an attempt to make James’s
wish come true, without getting himself killed as a result. He finally found his solution with a mix
between a potion and a spell. The users would drink the potion before reciting the spell and their
faces would morph into someone else's, until the spell was recited again. They still had their same
bodies so they had to make sure they dressed in a way no one would notice.

When Regulus had told James about his “present” he had also given him a new outfit to wear, as he
was sure James’s friends would recognize anything from his own closet. The outfit was nothing
particularly flashy, but it was expensive because Regulus wanted to see what James looked like. If
he cared about fashion, he was not disappointed. There was a fancy pair of muggle brand name
jeans and a button-up, but the brown leather jacket on top was Regulus’s favorite part. James
looked damned good in that jacket.

James had absolutely lit up when Regulus had told him that they were going to Hogsmeade
together, and only dimmed slightly when he discovered they wouldn't be going as themselves. Now
James seemed to be overjoyed with the idea again.
“I’m glad you like it. It was not an easy spell to perfect.”

James turned to him, still grinning, and cocked his head, “You want to know what my favorite part
about it is?”

Regulus mirrored him, cocking his own head, “And what would that be.”

James suddenly pulled Regulus in by his hand and grabbed the back of his head, pressing their lips
together.

Regulus sank into the kiss briefly before pulling back slowly, a little dazed. James was once again
grinning at him, his hazel eyes shining brightly through the lenses on his glasses. Regulus was
thankful James’s disguise still held his eyes or kissing the other man would have been unbearably
awkward. He just had to remember that it was James and he calmed down right away.

“My favorite part is that I can kiss you in the middle of Hogsmeade with our classmates mulling
about and get away with it.” James reached a hand down a palmed Regulus’s ass, “I fucking love
the fact that you still have your gorgeous ass with you.”

Regulus pulled away from James, laughing when they heard a Ravenclaw in Regulus’s year call
out for them to get a room. It was odd, being with James in front of all these people but he found he
loved it. Obviously, no one here actually knew the two blokes snogging in the middle of the street
and that is more than likely why he feels so free, but either way, it's nice.

Regulus couldn't help but grin at James’s wanton behavior, as he never acted so unrestrained, but
seeing as he had someone else's face, “Wow you are handsy, Mr. Potter. It's a good thing no one
knows who you are, or they might think you are an exhibitionist.”

James threw his head back in laughter, even though he didn't look like himself, that laugh was like
music to Regulus’s ears. James threw his arm around Regulus’s shoulder and they began walking
down the street, “I guess it's just the way you make me feel, Bunny. I just have the urge to snog
and grope you senseless, no matter the location.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, but couldn't keep the smile off his face. He hadn't realized how much them
being in public had meant to James. James seemed so much more happy and weightless like this. It
actually made Regulus feel quite guilty for denying him his request for so long, though they still
couldn't be together as themselves in public.

“So who’s gift are we looking for first?” Regulus questioned James, who insisted they do their
Christmas shopping together now that they had this free pass to be in public together.

James steered Regulus to a book shop at the end of the street, Regulus’s favorite. “We need to look
for a gift for Remus first and he reads more than anyone I know. Maybe if we are lucky I can find
something for my Dad here too. Anything that seems ancient, rare, and interesting should do for
him.”

Regulus quirked his eyebrow up at James’s obvious lack of ideas for his father, “And how should I
know what your father would find interesting, or what Lupin would like to read for that matter?”

“Well you enjoy reading, you probably have a special insight into what fellow readers enjoy.”

Regulus laughed, “I don't think that all readers have the same taste in books, dear.”

James turned to him with a grin, amusement dancing in his eyes, “Dear? Ooh, I love when you
give me pet names, Bunny.”

“I am the one giving pet names when you refer to me as Bunny?”

“Well obviously, I am not the only one who calls you that, so it's less of a pet name and more of a
nickname.”

As the two boys entered the book store Regulus took in the smell of old books and parchment,
before responding, “Your friends are the only ones who refer to me like that and they don't even
know who I am.”

“Touche.”

Regulus broke away from James to begin scouring one side of the book shop, while James went to
the other. It was like an unspoken agreement like they were a team, trying to be as efficient as
possible. Regulus liked the idea of being on a team with James.
By the time James found him again, he had picked out five new books for himself, two possibilities
for Fleamont Potter, and one book that Lupin might find passable. James had two books in his hand
that looked like they were for himself as well, unless Lupin was more into quidditch than he
seemed, but Regulus doubted it.

Regulus had no idea why James was in such a good mood, even though he had clearly failed at
finding them gifts, but the boy practically skipped over to Regulus, “Any luck?”

Regulus gave him a pointed look before gesturing to James's two books, “Better luck than you I
guess.”

James grinned at him sheepishly, “Yeah I have to admit I got a bit distracted by the quidditch
section.”

“I'm borrowing those from you when you are finished. I also did a little too well for myself.”
Regulus motioned to the personal books in his basket, “I do have these two as possible options for
your dad and this one as a possibility for Lupin, though.”

James looked at the first two options for his dad. The first one is an “ancient” looking copy of A
Compendium of Common Curses and their Counter-Actions by Fillius Capehart and a battered
book that looked to be a first edition of The Tales of Beedle the Bard by Beedle the Bard.

“Merlin Reg, you really do have an eye for these things. Dad would love both of these. I think I'll
get them both and give him one for Christmas and one for his birthday.”

Regulus tried to control his beaming, he had actually managed to pick out not one but two books
Fleamont Potter would like, “Is it his birthday soon?”

“No, I am just really shit at giving gifts. This saves me from having to buy him one later.”

Regulus rubbed his wrist where the red leather band was, thinking about when James gave it to
him. Only a few days after they had said they loved each other.

“I have a surprise for you, Bunny.”

Regulus snorted and wanted to be more upset but laying in bed with James always made his brain
short circuit. He couldn't even manage a groan for the ridiculous nickname as James hopped out of
bed and was digging through his jeans on the floor, looking for the so-called surprise.

Regulus was never one for surprises but adored how happy they made James, so he always
pretended to enjoy them just as much. James crawled back into bed with something clutched in his
hand, kneeling in front of Regulus. Regulus sat up and waited for James to speak.

“I know we have been together for a while now but I feel as though things are more concrete and
we should begin referring to Halloween as our anniversary.” He paused looking a bit nervous as
he glanced at Regulus for any sign of disagreement, when he found none he continued, “So I got us
something to remember the day by. They also act a bit like communication, they vibrate whenever
the other is thinking about you. I charmed them with our respective house colors and I thought we
could wear eachothers, if you are okay with that?”

He opened his palms to reveal the leather band and when Regulus stuck out his wrist, James
fastened the red one on it. He knew he could make up an excuse as to why he was wearing a red
bracelet to his friends, which meant there was no harm and having a little piece of James with him
every day.

He looked up at James with a small smile thinking about that night, “I think you give pretty nice
gifts.”

James looked down at his wrist and Regulus’s bracelet vibrated instantly. Regulus really should
find the constant and random vibrations his wrist got every day annoying, but really he found them
comforting. James would be in class and he would be thinking about Regulus and Regulus was sure
James felt plenty of vibrations on his end too.

“I'm glad you like it, Reggie. I think that Moony will really find a use for this book, how'd you
know he'd like it?”

Regulus shrugged, he had only talked to Remus once but he had gotten the impression that Remus
was similar to himself in terms of wit and intelligence, so he looked for a book that he would like,
if he were also friends with a bunch of dimwits. It was a book on magic accident reversals.

The two of them shopped all morning until they finally stopped at the Three Broomsticks for
lunch. It was busy like it always was on Hogsmeade weekends and people stared at the two boys
that they had never seen, who were clearly on a date, judging from the touching and occasional
kisses they shared.

Once they began ignoring the stares, because honestly, it's not like anyone knew them, they had a
really good time. James had convinced Madam Rosemerta to give them each a glass of Berry Ocky
Rot. They even managed to look nonchalant when they each saw their respective friends. James's
group of friends was at a corner table while Regulus saw Remy and Barty with a few other
Hufflepuffs.

Now that Barty and Regulus had fully cut Evan out of their lives, which was not easy considering
he was their roommate, they started spending more time with Remy and her friends. Barty was
more than Regulus, seeing as usually when Regulus was with James, Barty needed to spend time
with someone. Regulus sort of felt bad that Barty had ended his friendship with Evan because of
him and now he had no one to talk to but Remy, when Regulus was off with James.

He supposed everything that happened was for the best though because Barty and Evan fought
nearly every time the two of them were in the dorm together, so it probably wouldn't have worked
out anyway. Regulus for his part completely ignored Evan, no matter how many times he
“apologized”. It was never a real apology, just an “I'm sorry you're upset” or an “I'm sorry you
were tricked into becoming friends with a mudblood.”

Barty couldn't just ignore Evan, so instead, he insulted him constantly. It was actually pretty funny,
except it made living in the dorm almost unbearable.

Barty seemed to be getting along okay with Remy and her friends though, and Regulus sort of liked
that he was a bit less cruel around them, like he didn't have anyone to show off around.

“So we’ve got almost everyone done, except Marlene.” He paused for a second thinking, before
asking, “Do you think I should get Lily a gift?”

Regulus choked on his drink and James had to pat him on the back, “Are you okay Reg?”

Regulus cleared his throat, trying to calm a million thoughts racing through his head, before
speaking carefully, “Lily Evans?”

James didn't seem to notice anything peculiar about Regulus' reaction to his question, beyond the
choking, “Yeah, I mean I never have before but we did seem to become closer this year. And If I
am getting everyone else something, don't you think it would be rude to leave her out?”
Regulus sort of gaped at James, wondering how this boy could be so oblivious, “Do what you
want.”

James furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “What? What's wrong? Are you mad?”

“No.”

Suddenly, James leaned over and kissed Regulus straight on the lips, a deep kiss that felt like it
meant more than just a usual snog, “Do you see that? Lily is over there right now and I just kissed
you in front of her and I would do it with our own faces too. You have to know that you are the
only one I want, Regulus. You are the one that I think about practically every minute of the day,
I'm sure you feel the vibrations enough to know that. If that's not enough proof that I want you and
only you, then I don't know what is.”

Regulus wasn't sure what to say because of course James was right, which meant he was wrong and
he hated being wrong, “I'm sorry, you are….right.” Damn that was way too hard to get out, “It's
just, you liked her for so long and it's obvious she likes you now and she's obviously gorgeous and
I–.”

James interrupted grabbing Regulus’s hand, squeezing, “I liked her yes, past tense. She doesn't like
me now, she just doesn't think I am as annoying. And yes she's very pretty, but you are the most
gorgeous person I have ever seen. Do not cheapen yourself in front of me.”

Regulus felt like he wanted to cry, James was so good to him, in a way no one else would ever be,
“I love you.”

James smiled back at him, affection in his eyes, “I love you too, Reggie. Now, let's finish
shopping.”

******************************************************************************************

Remus

Remus was beginning to think Peter’s entire goal today was to foil every hint he dropped. He truly
didn't understand what the boy's reasoning would be, for wanting James to continue this secret
affair with Regulus. It wouldn't make any sense for him to want that, yet every time Remus
mentioned something regarding James and his boyfriend, Peter would jump in with some
convenient lie or half-truth.

Remus had made a decision the night after Sirius and he had confessed their feelings for each
other. He had known that the absolute last thing he wanted to do was hurt Sirius and finding out
about James and his brother would hurt him, but he also refused to let Sirius be played the fool any
longer.

Remus loved James, he had been there for Remus ever since they met on the train first year. James
was the first person who made Remus feel okay about being different. Remus had never really had
friends before coming to Hogwarts, mostly because his family had to stay off the grid because of
his affliction. He loved his parents but he was so excited to go to Hogwarts and have actual friends.
That was until a seventh-year by the name of Lucius Malfoy called him a scarred freak the moment
he stepped on the train. After that, he had found an empty compartment and cried, because he just
knew that everyone would treat him that way.

Then James Potter stepped into the compartment and asked if he could sit with Remus, before he
noticed the boy was crying. James had immediately come to sit by Remus and put his arm around
him, comforting him by telling Remus that whoever made fun of him was a slimy git. Once
Remus’s tears dried, the two boys talked until Sirius and later Peter joined their compartment and
Remus finally got the friends he had always wanted.

James was the reason for how Remus’s life was now, he knew that deep down. James was his very
first friend and he would never forget the many times James hexed someone on Remus’s behalf.
Remus loved all of his friends: He had always been a bit obsessed with Sirius, Peter was his
confidant through and through, but James he had always sort of seen as heroic, at least to him. It
was hard for Remus to reconcile the hero he had always seen James as, with someone who would
sneak around with his best friend's little brother.

Even though he couldn't understand James’s feelings, he knew he could never betray him by
telling Sirius directly. This is precisely why he decided that the best course of action was to just
drop hints in front of Sirius constantly until he put the puzzle together himself. Which he is quite
certain would've worked if it wasn't for Peter.

10:00 a.m. Great Hall

Remus deployed his plan on Hogsmeade weekend when he knew James would be preoccupied with
Regulus. It started at breakfast Saturday morning when James was conveniently missing. Hmm,
wonder where he was?

They were talking about something or another, Remus was way too focused on how exactly to
bring up his plan. Which was not good because he ended up blurting it outright in the middle of
Sirius’s story, on a muggle theater James and he had snuck off to during the summer, “I think that
your brother is the one who pulled the prank on Gryffindor.”

Sirius cut off his sentence and stared at Remus, confused both by the interruption and the content
of Remus’s sentence, “James?”

Remus shook his head and wanted to roll his eyes at Sirius’s denial that he has another brother,
“No, Regulus.”

Sirius furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, then looked deep in thought, like he was trying to
decide if his brother could have actually pulled the prank off or not. Peter looked suspicious and
narrowed his eyes before asking, “What makes you think that?”

Remus, who was completely focused on Sirius’s reaction at that moment, turned slightly to look at
Peter, wondering what Peter was thinking, “I saw him coming down from the seventh corridor
right after dinner. He passed us on his way and he looked a bit guilty.”

Sirius snorted at that, “He always looks guilty because he is always doing something suspicious. I
don't know if he really has the balls to pull a prank on Gryffindor by himself though.”

Remus tried to control his facial expressions, Sirius had just asked him the perfect question,
“That's the thing I can't figure out, he would have had to get into Gryffindor somehow. I wonder if
maybe someone skipped supper to help him.”

Sirius looked a bit surprised at that theory, “Who would've done that?”

Remus shrugged but then continued, “I am not sure but there is no other reason Regulus would be
on the seventh floor at that time at night. We might need to ask whoever stayed–.”

Remus was cut off abruptly by Peter snapping his fingers like an idea just came to him and crying
out, “Oh right! I was walking behind the Crouch kid and your brother the day after the prank, he
had mentioned that he had skipped dinner to meet Professor Flitwick. That is the only reason the
rest of the staff let him skip his regulated meal time because he was meeting Flitwick in his office,
which is on the seventh floor too.”

Remus stared at Peter. Unbelieving that Peter had just said that, wait no, that Peter had just so
blatantly lied like that. Remus was certain it was a lie. While Flitwick had been missing that night,
he only remembered because his tall chair had looked funny next to the normal-sized ones that the
rest of the teachers used. Peter had made a joke about it, he was certain he was missing supper
because he was not at Hogwarts altogether, as he had mentioned in class the day before.

Peter had just managed to create a convincing lie about the prank that had taken place a couple of
weeks prior. How the hell had he remembered that detail and used it to cover for both James and
his secret.

Remus knew he probably should have argued the point immediately after Peter repeated the lie,
because Sirius now responded in complete belief to his friend, “Oh right, yeah I remember that.
That makes a lot more sense than Regulus managing to pull that ingenious prank on us, he's not
creative enough. Plus I don't know anyone in Gryffindor that would've helped him.”

Remus glared at Peter and Peter glared back, while Sirius obliviously continued eating his
potatoes while remarking on a new prank he’d like to pull soon.

Remus had been pondering that moment for hours, trying to come up with a valid reason for Peter
to lie like that. He supposed he understood if Peter was trying to protect James, but if he truly knew
that James was with Regulus, why would he allow him to keep that from Sirius.

Remus truly didn’t understand Peter’s reasoning, but as the day went on he started to move past it.
He was going to make another attempt to hint toward James and Regulus as subtly as he could get
away with around Peter. Maybe Peter just didn't want Remus to be so obvious in his intentions.

He had really hoped that was the answer, but it became inherently clear that was not the case when
they were in the Three Broomsticks later that day.

2:00 p.m. The Three Broomsticks

They were on their second round of butterbeer and halfway through their plates of fish and chips
when Remus found his opportunity. The girls had left about ten minutes prior to do more shopping
but Sirius, Peter, and he were planning to hang out in the bar for the rest of the visit. Peter had
actually been the one to bring up Halloween and Sirius had immediately begun talking about the
hangover he had felt the next day, which was the perfect setup for Remus to ask, “Did we ever find
out who those bunny ears belonged to?”

Peter tilted his head in confusion, which made sense because Peter had left the party early and
slept over at Magdalene’s that night. Sirius knew exactly what Remus was talking about, though,
“Oh man I don't think so. I mean they have to belong to James’s Bunny right?”

Remus kept an eye on Peter, as he stiffened his posture and his eyes widened a bit, sensing
something was amiss with Remus’s question. Remus responded in a wry tone, trying to sound
unbothered, “I mean that would be my guess, but I didn't see anyone sneak out of James’s bed that
morning.”

Sirius frowned, “I don't remember seeing any bunny costumes, do you guys?”

Remus cut in before Peter could speak, “Yeah now that I think about it, I only saw one. It was
Regulus’s costume.”

Sirius widened his eyes, “Wh–”

Peter cut in abruptly ending Sirius’s thought, “Actually Marissa Leflo, Jeremy Case, and a handful
of others had bunny costumes on.” He turned toward Remus with an innocent look, “You really
didn't notice?”

Remus wasn't going to go down that easily, “I did actually but Regulus was the only gray bunny
and the ears we found were gray.”

Sirius sucked in a breath but Peter quickly argued, “No are you crazy? Regulus’s costume was
black, which was ironic because his last name, obviously. I saw another gray bunny costume from
behind but I didn't actually get to see who it was.”

Remus gritted his teeth as Sirius finally spoke with a relieved little laugh, “Ah that sounds more
right, that spell had a penchant for irony if I do remember. Peter, I am so glad you have a good
memory. Moony over here nearly gave me a heart attack with his details, but his memory does slip
more when it gets closer to the… ya know.”

He laughed a bit harder then, squeezing his eyes shut with a vision, “I wish I could've seen Reggie
all trussed up in a bunny costume though. Would have been a sight and I am sure he absolutely
hated it, which makes it better.”

Remus sulked the rest of the Hogsmeade trip while Peter looked slightly smug. Remus had to
admit, he had every right to. Remus never knew that Peter was such a damn good liar.

After that failure, Remus had to reevaluate his plan. Every time he tried to be subtle, Peter talked
Sirius out of believing him. Which was sort of disturbing considering Sirius and him were in a
relationship and he still took Peter's word over his own boyfriend. He really was going to have to
talk to Sirius about that when this was all over.

He was starting to get extremely frustrated with Peter and his reluctance to allow Sirius to put the
pieces together. Peter loved James as much as the rest of them but Remus never thought he favored
James above Sirius. Maybe he didn't, but his current behavior was suggesting as much. Why was
he allowing Sirius to be lied to in this way, especially after the amount of shit he has had to go
through in his life already?

Peter knew that Sirius had large trust issues because of the family he grew up in, where
manipulation was the most sincere way of showing affection, and yet he was allowing James to go
behind his back like this? Remus knew that in a way he was allowing it as well, by not straight out
telling Sirius, but he was trying his best to help Sirius find out without tattling on James.

Remus decided that the best opportunity to talk to Sirius without Peter ruining everything would be
when Peter was with Magdalene tonight after supper. James was still going to be with Regulus so it
gave him the perfect opportunity to drop his least subtle hint.

7:00 p.m. Gryffindor Dormitory

Sirius was laying on his bed with his head in Remus’s lap, as Remus attempted to read his book on
ancient charms. Peter and James had just left the dorm after supper to go visit their respective
significant others. Remus was honestly glad to see them go for once. Peter had been driving him
nuts all day and pretending nothing was wrong around James was a struggle.

He waited a while after they were gone as he read and Sirius braided his hair before he braced the
subject, “Hey Pads?”
“Yeah, babe?” Remus glared at him, hating being called that pet name but also getting slight
butterflies at hearing those words come from Sirius, “Sorry. Yeah, Moons?”

Remus smiled at the begrudging correction, “That's much better, thank you. So I have been
wondering, do you have any ideas as to who James’ Bunny could be?”

Remus decided that the best course of action was to figure out what Sirius knew first and work
backward from there. Especially now that he actually had time to have a proper discussion without
Peter butting in every second.

Sirius looked up at Remus from his reclining position, “I have a couple of theories. Why?”

Remus raised an eyebrow wondering what Sirius’s theories were. He knew of course none of them
were correct because if Sirius actually knew the truth, James wouldn’t have just enjoyed a relaxing
day with his brother, “I’m incredibly curious. You share your theories and I'll share mine.”

Sirius grinned at him, a mischievous glint in his eye, “Deal. Okay, so I am pretty sure it's a
Slytherin because honestly, I can't think of any other reason Prongs wouldn't tell us. I think that the
boy is a deep closet case so probably a pureblood. He also has to be able to speak French. So my
three theories are Castian Preston, Thomas Fawley, and ugh I hate even saying this one, but Barty
Crouch.”

That had absolutely not been what Remus had expected. He really hadn't thought Sirius had been
putting as much thought into the mystery as he had. He wasn't sure why he had thought he was the
only one curious, probably because Peter and Sirius were both very good at hiding their
intentions, but it had been silly nonetheless. Remus really didn't see James with Preston or Fawly,
but he supposed out of Slytherins they were the most acceptable, being they weren't part of the
mini-death eater squad.

Remus’ biggest shock from Sirius’s list had been Barty Crouch, because honestly how could Sirius
be so close to the answer yet so far away. Regulus and Barty were best friends but their
personalities were miles apart. It made Remus wonder what Sirius thought James’s type was,
because if he thought James could be dating an asshole like Crouch then their friendship had more
problems than he thought.

“Barty Crouch? Really? Why the hell do you think that?”

Sirius faked a gag before replying, making it clear he hated even thinking about the idea, “I know
it's a repulsive theory, but honestly I have noticed James looking his way a lot. It doesn't matter
where Crouch sits at the Slytherin table, James’s eyes always find him. That's why I had to put him
on my list, plus I don't know if you noticed the green bracelet on James’ wrist, it has to be for a
Slytherin, right?”

Remus felt a little queasy, even he hadn't realized that James had been staring at, not Barty but
Regulus who he sat next to, every day. Sirius had been noticing things about James all this time,
yet he still didn't put two and two together. Remus wondered briefly if Sirius was just in denial, he
wasn't an ignorant man, but anyone could ignore the signs if they really didn't want to hear the
truth. The truth is that James wasn't into Barty Crouch, but instead his little brother Regulus
Black.

Remus spoke carefully, “Huh? I hadn't noticed that. I don't know if it could be any of your theories
though.”

“Why is that?”

Remus shrugged nonchalantly, ‘Well I mean if it was one of them wouldn't James have said he
wanted to kiss one of them during the game of Truth or Dare?”

Sirius leaned up and looked confused, “What are you talking about? That was all a joke. Peter and
James both said so.”

Remus chuckled a bit, “Please, I think everyone in that circle saw him eat that mint.”

Sirius gaped at Remus and his thoughts looked like they were running a mile a minute. Remus
could guess what he was thinking, he had clearly thought he had seen James eat the mint too. Now
that someone confirmed they had seen it as well, he could be suspicious again.

Sirius opened his mouth to speak but never got a chance to as Peter burst in the door, “Hey guys!”

Remus couldn't believe the lengths Peter would go to, “Peter what are you doing here? I thought
you were hanging out with Magdalene.”

He narrowed his eyes at Remus, “I was but for some reason, I felt I was needed here.”
Remus glared but Sirius seemed glad to ask Peter what was weighing on his mind, “Pete, the other
week when we were playing our truth or dare game, how were you so sure James was playing
along to your joke and not actually telling the truth?”

Remus almost wanted to smirk, wondering how Peter was going to get out of this one. To Peter's
credit, his face didn't even waver, he smirked as if remembering the joke, “I knew that he wasn't
telling the truth because first, the last person he would ever want to kiss would be your brother,
and it's literally my game if you don't recall. I switched a couple of the mints and James picked up
the ones that had a P indented in them, for placebo.”

Remus could not believe that Peter had made up that lie on the spot, for god sake if Remus didn't
already know that Peter was purposely trying to protect James, he might have believed it himself.
One glance at Sirius told him all that he needed to know, he believed Peter.

It honestly wasn't fair that Peter was so trustworthy. Remus didn't know if it was the way Peter
spoke or the innocence on his face, but he was nearly impossible not to trust. Remus even still
trusted him, despite all the lies he had watched him tell, just not about James and Regulus.

Sirius once again looked relieved to have his suspicions debunked, “You're right Pete, James
would never want to kiss that prat. By the way, that was a real thought-out prank you had, nice
one.”

Peter smirked and then in his most polite voice asked, “Thanks. Sirius, do you mind giving Moony
and me a few minutes to talk. I need to discuss something with him.”

Sirius looked between Remus and Peter confused, but nodded anyway, “Sure Wormy. I’ll see if any
of the girls are in the common room. Come down and get me when I can come back up.”

As soon as Sirius closed the door, Peter threw up silencing spells while Remus locked the door.
They both knew they were about to have it out.

Now the two of them were staring at each other in their empty dorm room, waiting for the other to
speak first. Peter was the one to break the silence, plastering a fake smile on his face, “So you’ve
been a busy guy today, haven't you?”

Remus stood up from his place on his bed and stared down at Peter, who was quite a bit shorter
than him, “Yeah, but not quite as busy as you have been, constructing all those lies.”
Peter finally dropped the pretense of a friendly conversation, “When did you find out?”

Remus let out a bitter laugh, “During the truth or dare game. Exactly how long have you known
James has been fucking Sirius’s brother behind all our backs?”

Peter groaned, as if the idea of James and Regulus having sex was disturbing to him, “For a while,
but unlike you, I don't feel it's necessary to destroy our friend group over it.”

Remus couldn't believe what Peter was saying, was he seriously saying that if they kept it a secret
everything would be fine? “What the fuck are you talking about? Our friend group is already going
to be destroyed over this when Sirius finds out! Unless you were planning on leaving him in the
dark forever, while James betrays him behind his back.”

Peter crossed his arms and rolled his eyes as if Remus was the one being irrational, “Of course, I
didn't fucking plan on that. In fact, I don’t have a plan about any of this, because quite honestly it's
none of my or your business.”

Remus took a predatory step towards his friend, practically gritting out, “Excuse me? How the fuck
is this none of my business? These are our two best friends and we have an obligation as their
friends to make sure they don't get hurt and you are shirking those duties right now.”

“Oh fuck off Remus, we don't have an obligation to ruin their friendship. I think we can both admit
James is being a fucking prick right now, but that doesn't mean that he isn't going to fix this mess.
And personally, I don't see it as my mess to fix and neither should you.”

“James is being a prick? No, James is acting much worse than that. I can't even begin to
understand how he thinks shagging Sirius's little brother is remotely okay. I mean he fucking came
and asked me about sex and I gave him advice! Advice for him to screw over Sirius more
thoroughly. And you are just allowing him to do this shit.”

“I am not allowing it, Remus.”

“Really? Then why the fuck have you been ruining every chance I get to put this out in the open.
All-day you've been telling bullshit lies to protect James and his stupid boyfriend.”
“What about you? Do you think that you're being selfless in your attempts? Tell me, Remus, why
the hell aren't you ratting out James to Sirius directly? Why do you tiptoe around the truth, giving
me the opportunity to block your attempts? Why is that?”

Remus felt his blood boil at the assumption that he was acting as bad as Peter. He was grateful for
the silencing spell because it was about to get loud, well louder, “How fucking dare you! Do you
think we are doing the same thing? Not even close. I am attempting to help Sirius find out the truth
without ratting out my best friend. You, on the other hand, are just trying to enable James’s
betrayal.”

“James’s betrayal? Huh, so what would you call you and Sirius sneaking off behind all of our
backs for the last month, then?”

Remus’s temper dropped and suddenly he was more afraid than angry. What had Peter just said?
Did he know about Sirius and Remus? How? How the fuck did Peter seem to know about
everyone's secrets? What was he, an occlumens?

Remus was too shocked to speak, so Peter continued, “Oh I see, it's only betrayal because we know
about it. If nobody knew then it doesn't count. Talk about being hypocritical.”

Then Remus was doing something he never did, he cried. Remus was not a crier, that needed to be
made clear. He didn't cry at his grandma's funeral, he didn't cry when Sirius almost made him kill
Snape, and he certainly didn't cry when he came out to everyone for the first time. For some
reason, hearing Peter call him out for being a hypocrite hurt, mostly because he knew he was right.

James and his indiscretions were not of equal value, but it really wasn't fair for Remus to act as if
he had done nothing wrong while persecuting James. They were both liars, hell all of them were
liars. Remus wondered when his favorite people in the world, people he would die for, started
turning on each other and no longer saw each other as someone they could trust. He couldn't
answer for anyone else but he really didn't know when it happened and he was ashamed.

Remus finally broke his silence, his voice much smaller and brittle than before, “You're right I am.
I have been such a hypocrite and I am sorry Pete.”

Peter immediately stepped forward and pulled Remus into a hug, which was a little awkward
because of their height difference. Remus realized that this was the reason he loved Peter. Peter
cared about people so much, especially his friends. All-day he had been cursing Peter's name
because the boy was ruining his plans, but he never stopped to think about what Peter's plan was.
Peter wanted to make all of them feel safe and Remus had been messing that up all day.
They stayed embraced for a few minutes until Remus’s tears had nearly dried, before Peter pulled
away. He looked Remus straight in the eyes as he said, “Moony, you know I love you right? You
know that I am not upset about you and Sirius at all and that I am happy that you two have finally
realized your feelings for each other? In the same way, I can't be mad at James for falling in love
with the wrong person. It wouldn't be fair and I am just trying my best to let everyone move at their
own time.”

“James is in love with Regulus?” All this time he had assumed that the two were just shagging, or
at the very most, infatuated with each other. He had maybe thought of the word love but he didn't
actually believe James could be in love with Regulus. The Regulus that Sirius described as bigoted
and cruel. How could James, who was one of the most caring people Remus knew, be in love with
someone like that?

Peter nodded solemnly, “Yes, he told me on Halloween. Since then I have noticed the looks they
share from across the Great Hall, they are ridiculously gone for each other. A lot like you and
Sirius are.”

Remus would never compare Sirius’s and his relationship to theirs, “We are not the same though,
Peter. Sirius and I fell in love after years of friendship and those two had a quick shag in the locker
room. Saying that our relationships are the same is ridiculous.”

Peter let out a little laugh and sat down on his bed, waving Remus over. Remus sat down next to
his friend, “I said similar not the same. Every relationship is different, Remus, but saying that yours
is more real because it started differently is ridiculous. Maggie and I started with a hookup at a
party and we have been together for months, is that less important because of the way we started?”

Remus had not thought of it that way. He really did admire Magdalene and Peter’s relationship.
They were great together and it was obvious that they were deeply in love. He would never say
that their relationship was less important than his and Sirius's.

“No, I really wouldn't and I am sorry if it seemed that way. But if James and Regulus are in love
then why is their relationship a secret? Is it because James is scared of how Sirius will react or
something bigger?”

Peter sighed and ran his hand through his hair, a little frustrated, “I would like to tell you that I
know the full answer but I don't. I know what James has told me. James wants to tell everyone
about Regulus and him, but he will not do it without Regulus being on board, obviously. So he
essentially brings it up all the time, but Regulus shuts him down because of his family. The reason
I have been protecting James’s secret is that I don't want to be the reason someone is forced out of
the closet. It's the same reason I have been protecting your secret since I found out too.”

Peter had been protecting their secret? Oh, Merlin, Peter had been protecting their secret! All this
time Remus thought that it was dumb luck that Peter always seemed to distract people right before
they discovered Sirius and him in a compromising position, but really Peter had purposely been
doing it all along. He was protecting Sirius and Remus from having to come out before they were
ready. Merlin, he fucking loved Peter.

“I love you, Peter. Seriously, you are the best friend that any of us could ask for. I am really sorry
for yelling at you and glaring at you all day. I've been really shitty to you and you didn't deserve
that.”

Peter smiled and patted Remus on the shoulder lightly, “You were doing what felt right for you, I
understand. But do you see my point of view now?” Remus nodded because he certainly did see his
point of view, “Good, now I know you want Sirius to find out and I do too. As badly as I think the
fallout of this all is going to be, it will only get worse the longer it takes. I just refuse to out anyone
without their permission, so I just continue to hope that James can convince Regulus and we can all
start being honest with each other again.”

Remus smiled slightly at Peter, why was Peter always right? As much as he was going to hate
knowing something like this without Sirius knowing it as well, he knew that he couldn't continue
trying to deliberately out Regulus and James. Plus let's be honest he was shit at being subtle
anyways. He knew one thing though, he absolutely would not lie to his boyfriend. If Sirius asked
him point-blank then he would tell him, but if he didn't then he would let him find out on his own
or wait till James told him.

“Yeah, I think you are right. I won't keep dropping hints, but I also will not lie or cover for him like
you've been doing. I will be passive about this whole thing until it comes into the light,
understand?”

Peter nodded his understanding, “Are you going to tell James that you know?”

“No, I don't want to be dragged into this more than I already am.”

The two of them shared a pathetic laugh, both mentally exhausted from their argument and then
discussion, “That's probably for the best because between you and me, James never shuts up about
Regulus. You'd think the boy hung the moon with how James describes him.”
Remus smiled slightly, for some reason knowing that their affair was built on love rather than lust
made this whole thing easier to swallow. He could relate to falling in love with someone you
probably weren't supposed to and he knew how hard it was to control those feelings once they were
out there, “That's actually sweet. I still want him to come clean but I am glad he's happy, even
though it's with someone like Regulus.”

Peter laughed about that and stood up, “Well I better go grab Sirius and tell him our discussion is
over. I am going to go back to find Maggie so you guys will have the room to yourself again.”

Remus nodded, suddenly feeling a bit queasy, “Yeah you better grab him. We need to have a
discussion anyway.”

Peter turned back to Remus looking a little shocked, “You know you don't actually have to tell him
that I know, right? I won't say anything if you guys aren't ready.”

Remus knew that Peter wouldn't say anything, which was precisely why he had to tell Sirius,
because he deserved to know. He also felt it was time Sirius and he had a discussion about whether
they were ready to come out. They really haven't discussed it since their first date. Remus figured
that if James could have this discussion with Regulus then Sirius and he could as well.

He wouldn't push Sirius to come out before he was ready, but he figured it was fair to know where
they both stand at the moment, “I know, but he should know. Thanks for talking to me and
everything else Peter. You are the best friend a guy could ever have.”

Peter grinned at him, “Thanks and good luck to you, Moony.” He opened the door, breaking the
silencing spell before turning back, “Remember that no matter what you guys decide to do, I'll
support you.”

Remus took a minute before Sirius joined him to thank Merlin that they met Peter on that train in
the first year, because honestly they'd all be lost without him.

******************************************************************************************

James

“Don't go.” James practically pleaded with Regulus. The absolute last thing he wanted was to see
Reggie get on that train later that day, knowing he was going to that house. That house that he had
already seen one person he cared about torn apart in. He would be damned if he saw Regulus
treated the same way, which was precisely why he was begging Regulus to stay.

Regulus sighed deeply, he was annoyed at James, that much was clear, “You know that I have to
go. Nothing bad is going to happen to me at my own house, James.”

“It already has! You've already been hurt in that house and it would kill me to see you hurt again. I
just want you safe.” James motioned towards Regulus’s scarred legs which had a pair of black
slacks covering them at the moment.

Regulus seemed a bit taken off guard at James referring to his scars but he quickly recovered, “I'll
be fine James. That happened when I was younger before I knew how to stay out of my mother's
way. The trick is to be as unobtrusive as can be and I excel at that, don't worry.”

James’s hopeful expression fell, knowing that once Regulus made his mind up, he did not change
it. The idea that Regulus had to have a strategy, let alone one that made him practically disappear,
to visit his own home was preposterous. James fucking hated Regulus’s parents.

He pouted, giving Regulus one last opportunity to back out of his holiday plans, “Come on Bunny,
you could stay here with me. I'll be here until Christmas Eve, after the full moon and then you can
come to my house with me.”

Regulus scoffed, looking offended at the proposal, “Yeah, and stay with my brother for Christmas?
How domestic.”

James rolled his eyes at his boyfriend's scathing tone, “No, Sirius is staying at Andromeda’s for
Christmas this year, seeing as he hasn't seen her in a while and I think Moony is joining him. Peter
is splitting his holidays between his girlfriends' house and his own, so it really would be just us and
my parents. Wouldn't that be great?”

Regulus gave him a slight smile, and James knew Regulus was going to turn him down once again,
“That sounds lovely James. I'm sure your parents are great people, but no, I need to stay with my
family.”

James felt as if a cement block was sitting on his chest, he felt heavy as he spoke next, “Please
come back to me unharmed?”
Regulus leaned in and kissed James before pulling back slightly, “I promise I will.”

Then Regulus held his pinky out in front of James for him to take and James couldn't help but grin.
He took Regulus’s pinky and they swore on it. Regulus gave him a kiss on the cheek, “Okay we
have to get down to the holiday feast.”

James nodded sadly, not wanting to be away from Regulus all break, “I love you and I am going to
miss you.”

Regulus smiled back, “I love you too, Jamie.”

*************************************************************************************

James was talking to Mary and Peter when it happened. They were gossiping about a rumor going
around about Professor Sprout. James was surprisingly invested in the story, as usually, gossip
wasn't his thing. When suddenly Sirius stood up and climbed onto the table?

James honestly had no idea what was going on as his friend pulled Moony up as well. Remus
looked extremely panicked as he slowly and ungracefully pulled himself onto the table as well.
People were yelling or laughing at them, but James wasn't sure why.

Then he did it. Sirius, his best friend in the entire world, grabbed Remus by the shirt and pulled
him down for a kiss. A kiss. A fucking kiss in front of the entire school. What the fuck? When did
this happen? Had this been happening under his nose?

The Great Hall was so quiet you could hear a pin drop and that was when Sirius pulled back from
the kiss. He looked around at the shocked faces before calling out, “Sorry about that folks! Just felt
I wanted to give my boyfriend a good snog before the holidays!”

Suddenly the Great Hall erupted in noise and James wasn't sure what to focus on. He tried to
reconcile that his two best friends were dating. They were dating? Sirius was bisexual or gay?

The more he thought about it the more he realized it made a lot of sense. Sirius had always looked
at Remus a little more than friends usually do. And he would practically drool when Remus wore
anything besides his usual cardigans.

People were cheering and yelling their congratulations. The two boys had climbed off the table by
now and people were greeting them. James was just getting up to congratulate them himself when
he suddenly heard, above all the noise, voices calling them derogatory and homophobic names.

Before he knew it he was up and charging across the Great Hall towards the voices, which were
conveniently coming from of the Slytherin table. Mulciber and Avery were a couple of the culprits.
James was in their faces before they could finish a sneeze, he quickly stuck his wand against
Mulcibers neck. He heard a whimper to his left and saw that Peter had joined him in shoving his
wand against Avery's neck.

“You filthy homophobic piece of shit. If I ever hear you spit that garbage again at them or anyone
else in this school you will wish you were never born. I will fucking end you, Mulciber. Do you
think your daddy's name protects you? Bullshit you are just another pureblood arse that no one will
miss when you're gone. Don't think that because I am “light” I will hesitate to end you, you slimy
git.” James’s tone darkened to a level he had never heard before, he turned to look towards Avery,
“And that goes for you too.”

James backed up when McGonagall came towards them, demanding they back off. Mulciber who
still looked a bit shocked, spoke, “Professor you heard that! He just threatened me, expel him!”

She turned her sharp nose at him and spoke calmly, “I don't expel people for standing up for what
is right, Mr. Mulciber.”

Then she strode away. James loved that woman, truly. As he and Peter walked back to their table
James made eye contact with Regulus, who gave him the faintest trace of a smile. James suddenly
felt incredibly proud that Regulus had seen and approved of his actions.

When they got back to Sirius and Remus they gave both of them a hug. James lingered on Sirius a
bit before whispering in his ear, “I am so proud of you. You are my best friend and I love you. I am
happy for you and Remus, though you probably could've told me a little sooner.”

When they pulled away Sirius looked slightly guilty but when James gave him a reassuring smile,
he grinned.

After the feast, when everyone was packing for their holidays, the Marauder boys decided to spend
the night with only each other for once. They laughed, talked, and played games all night.

When the train left in the morning, James felt a pang of sadness for Regulus leaving, but luckily he
had his friends with him to keep him distracted.
 Christmas Part 1
Chapter Notes

The Christmas chapter was going to be one chapter, but it ended up being way bigger
than I thought. So the second part of the Christmas chapter is coming. Hope you enjoy
this chapter!

Regulus

Regulus was loathsome to admit it, but he was a bit scared to go home. He had always felt a little
anxiety in Grimmauld Place, but never outright fear as he did now. He supposed it was because
this time when he was going home, he was going home with the knowledge that he had blatantly
disobeyed his mother while at school.

Usually, he was the perfect student and son while away at school, so a little anxiety was all that
was really necessary when he came back home. Not this time though, he had disobeyed his mother
more times than he could count. His mother had told him to stay away from those with dirty blood,
and he proceeded to befriend a half-blood. His mother told him to look down on blood traitors and
while he had technically been doing that whenever he rode James Potter, somehow he didn't think
she would be okay with his interpretation of that rule. She had also told him to study harder and
make sure that he did perfectly on the OWLs, which he had not been doing, but that was because
he was only allotted a certain amount of time to study, not that he would tell his mother that.

The main thing Regulus really worried about was whether his mental shields would hold up
through the entire holiday. His mother had been using legitimacy on both Sirius and him since they
had started talking. It was the main reason he had so many scars from when he was a child.
Eventually, he learned to control what she saw, in a way that meant she didn't know that he was
closing thoughts off from her. Sirius learned it as well but he often purposely left gaps in his shields
so he could make her mad.

Regulus always had his shields secured from his mother, but that was before he had so much to
hide from her. Lord, he couldn't even imagine what she would do to him if she found out the truth.
If she found out about James or Remy, hell even if she found out about him ending his friendship
with Evan, it would be bad. Walpurga never liked Barty all that much, she only tolerated him
because he seemed to be enveloped in Slytherin culture, which made him different enough from his
father to be acceptable. Now though, with neither Regulus nor Barty spending much time with
other Slytherins, she wouldn't accept him as Regulus's friend.

Regulus wouldn't have to keep his shields firm the entire holiday, given that the Black family was
never particularly close. His parents and he usually had dinner together, but other than that most
days they didn't see each other. Especially in the last couple of years, with the Dark Lord's power
growing. Regulus hated admitting that his parents were death eaters, but they were. They were
footmen for the Dark Lord's army and with the war raging on, he very much doubted his parents
would have too much time to spend with him.

Christmas’s used to involve grand parties and stuffy robes, when he and Sirius were younger.
Those ended a few years back, but Regulus could never forget the jokes Sirius would crack about
the guests. How Andromeda would always tell them gossip about the different members of society.
Even how Bella used to despise and attempt to avoid dancing with, her now current husband, at all
costs. She once even climbed out the bathroom window. Now though, at least for her, there was no
escape, seeing as she married the mad man known as Rudolphus Lestrange.

As memorable as those Christmas’ were, the holiday that Regulus was truly seared into his
memory was last Christmas Eve. The Christmas where Sirius had left Grimmauld Place and never
looked back. The Christmas that Regulus had lost a brother. He could still hear the shrieks of pain
from Sirius, as their mother hexed him over and over again. The high sharp laugh of Bellatrix as
she watched him writhe in pain. He could still feel the sting on his cheek from his mother's palm,
when he tried to interfere after Sirius had passed out from the pain. It was and still is, the worst day
of his life and he didn't foresee that ever-changing.

Regulus didn't see his parents at the train station, which wasn't much of a surprise considering they
despised seeing muggles and muggle-borns on platform 9 ¾. It wasn't long before he found
Kreacher, who usually was the one to pick him up. He was happy to see the elf, he much preferred
being picked up by him than that time his mother had sent Bella. Ugh, he still shivered at the
words she had used to describe his classmates.

The elf reached out to grab Regulus’s suitcase, “Kreacher is happy to see you, Master Regulus.”

Regulus smiled and affectionately patted Kreacher's head, not daring to be any more friendly than
that. Unfortunately, most of the wizarding world still looked down on house-elves and they found
it bizarre for a wizard to treat them well, “ I am very glad to see you Kreacher. How are you? And
mother and father?”

Kreacher plastered on a smile that had always looked forced to Regulus, but he knew it wasn't,
“Kreacher is doing well. My Master and Mistress are doing very important work. They will not be
home when we arrive.”

Regulus wanted to tell Kreacher that his response really hadn’t answered his question, but figured it
was easier to leave it alone. If his parents were doing “important work” then he was sure they were
fine. Kreacher grasped Regulus’s arm, apparating them to the grim exterior of Grimmauld Place.
As he looked at the place he had called home all of his life, he had a realization. Grimmauld place
itself wasn't scary and it never had been, it was just a normal rundown house. His entire life he had
always felt as if there was something wrong with the house itself, but now it was just a house. The
real reason the house had always felt so cold and twisted was his family. Whether it be his parents,
the wall of house-elf heads, or the portraits of his ancestors on the wall, it was all demented.

When Kreacher opened the large adorned door for him, he stepped inside and his eyes immediately
began adjusting to the dark interior of the house. The house that had been in their family for
centuries, that was worth more than most pureblood dwellings, had been so miskept that it looked
more like a hovel than the regal home it was supposed to be. It had only gotten worse over the
years as his mother fell deeper into madness and his father retreated farther into the family
finances.

As he scanned the place that he had called home for fifteen years, he felt a bit glad that his parents
never invited any guests beyond family to their house anymore, it was frankly shameful what they
had done to their ancestral home. When he was the head of the house, the first thing he would do
would be to put this house back to its formal glory. Of course, that wouldn't be for a long time and
by then he would probably be…..married to his mother's choice of bride.

It pained him to think of being married. It wasn't the idea of being married to a woman that was the
problem, even though he was so obviously gay. It was the idea of marrying and building a life with
anyone but James Potter. His heart clenched a bit at the thought of what was sure to become a
reality.

Maybe he could be like uncle Alphard and never marry. Uncle Alphard, while not disowned, was
the black sheep of the family, but he had always seemed happy. He knew that was an impossibility
though, as he was the only one that could continue the Black name.

Regulus smirked at a fact he had only just considered. The Black family had only two sons to
continue a century-long line and they both preferred the company of another man. It was almost
poetic justice and he wondered briefly what it would be like for his mother to learn of that fact. He
knew she never would but it was a nice thought anyway.

Christ, he was sounding like Sirius now. He shook out his thoughts and climbed the creaky
staircase, passing the elf heads on the way to his room. He passed Sirius’s room and decided to
take a quick detour, since Kreacher had gone downstairs to prepare tea.

The door creaked as he opened it and he was slightly surprised his mother hadn’t locked it.
Everything had a layer of dust settled on it from a year of disuse. There were still clothes and
records on the floor from when he made his quick getaway. Regulus walked around the room
touching the layer of dust on the desk, the dresser, and the bedside table making sure it really had
been a year.

Regulus examined the half-naked muggle girls permanently on the walls and he really felt nothing
for them. He wasn't disgusted as his mother had been, but he hadn’t enjoyed them the way Sirius
had. The only thought he really had about them was whether they knew that they would be on the
walls of this house for the rest of eternity and how they would feel about that. He wondered what
James would think if he saw these posters.

Regulus wandered over to the wardrobe and opened it, wondering what clothes Sirius had left
behind. The door of the wardrobe was covered in photos. Photos of James and the rest of their
friends, of James and Sirius, of James and his parents, and most importantly of James. Okay so
there were more pictures than just of James, but still, he was a very common occurrence in the
photos.

There was a photo of James smiling at the camera before turning a goofy face, at Sirius who
must've been taking the picture. Regulus stared at it for a few minutes before peeling it off and
stuffing it in his pocket, thankfully Sirus had not put the permanent sticking charm on these photos.
He was just about to close the door when his eyes landed on his own face.

It was a photo of Sirius and Regulus from when they were kids, he knew from memory that
Kreacher had taken it at Sirius's request. Well, Sirius never really requested anything of Kreacher,
but he had demanded that the house-elf take pictures of them more often.

Their parents never did and Sirius was worried they wouldn't have any photos from when they
were kids. They were sitting on the back porch of the house looking out into the garden, that
Kreacher used to keep. Sirius was doing some childhood magic that he really couldn't control, but
was trying to entertain Regulus anyways. He was levitating ants in little bubbles of air, while
Regulus giggled childishly at the bubbles. They were six and seven at the time, Regulus pocketed
that photo too.

It was then that he decided to leave before this mother returned and screamed at him for going into
the blood traitor's room. He sighed as he gave his brother's room one last look before closing the
door, not knowing if he'd ever return.

*************************************************************************************

It turned out that Regulus was very wrong. He had been home for four days and he hadn't even
seen his mother or father. Kreacher was the only contact he had all week. Luckily Kreacher and he
had plenty of practice in being each other's only company since Sirius had left.

Every day Kreacher would bring him breakfast, and he ate in his room since it was just him.
Regulus would read the Daily Profit out loud for both of them. Then Kreacher would leave to
attend to other things and Regulus would wander into Sirius’s room and look around until lunch.
Kreacher and he would eat lunch in the kitchens and then they'd sit out in the back garden.
Kreacher loved hearing about school, so Regulus told him everything, except about James and
Remy of course. Then they'd make dinner together and Regulus would wander into the library to
read until he was tired and then would to bed.

Really his days had been painfully boring since he arrived home, but it was better than how it
usually was, just painful. Tonight was slightly different because after dinner Kreacher handed
Regulus a letter from his mother. He skipped the library and went up to his room to read it instead.

Regulus,

Your father and I have been away on business for the Dark Lord. I expect you have still been
behaving yourself in the manner of a respectable heir while we have been away. Studying for your
OWL’s is a wonderful way to pass the time without the holidays being a complete waste they
usually are. We will be back on Christmas Eve and the family will be joining us for dinner. After
dinner, we can catch up.

-Walpurga Viance Black

Short and sweet, just how his mother preferred her letters. She never wasted time with pleasantries
and she wouldn't expect a letter back. Unless she specifically asked for a reply, she viewed
responses as a waste of time. Considering she had already accused him of wasting time, he wouldn't
bother.

The letter's contents were pretty expected. He had assumed that his father and mother were away
doing the Dark Lord's bidding, but he did wonder if it had to do with all the attacks he had been
reading about in the news lately. That thought made him a bit sick to his stomach.

The family coming over for Christmas was also to be expected, as they had been doing that since
the grand events had stopped. That meant that he would be seeing his aunt and uncle, Bellatrix and
Rudophus, and Narcissa and Lucius as well as his parents. He was particularly worried about
Lucius and Narcissa, given the letter he had sent her before the break, he hoped she hadn't told
Lucius because that would frankly be awkward.
The really concerning piece of her letter was the last sentence, “After dinner, we can catch up.”
What had she meant by that? Walpurga Black didn't catch up with anyone, let alone her sons or
son. She might demand a report of their studies but she would never phrase it in such a cavalier
way. It concerned him in a way that was probably dramatic. Yet, he couldn't help but wonder what
her possible motivation for this “catch up” was. He knew that there was no way to know her
thoughts yet, so all he could do was wait.

******************************************************

Regulus had been thinking nonstop about his mother's letter and specifically what that last sentence
meant. He really couldn't figure it out but he had narrowed it down to two things: Either she was
going to kill him or she wanted to hear about everything he had ever done wrong and then kill him.
Oh god, what if she wanted him to meet the dark lord? He didn't think he would be able to handle
that.

Then he went through a phase where he considered the idea that his mother had only put the
uncharacteristic phrase in the letter to have him stress over it, to mess with his mind. She had
always seemed to enjoy psychological games more than physical ones. He decided that couldn't be
the reason though, as she was still his mother and wouldn't want him to suffer like that for no
reason.

He had essentially spent the couple of days he had until Christmas Eve, contemplating his mother's
letter, worrying about Narcissa, and strengthening his mental shields. He thought that his shields
were pretty strong at this point, to the point that nothing he didn't want his parents to know about
was hidden completely out of sight. His secrets are buried on different levels of severity within his
memories. Barty and his ending of their friendship with Evan were the closest to the surface, while
Remy was farther down, and buried as deep as he could be, James. There was no way in hell James
would be coming to the surface without his express permission.

Regulus missed James, embarrassingly so. He thought about him all the time and he was sure
James could tell from the vibrations on his bracelet. He had felt quite a few vibrations himself,
which was a bit surprising because Regulus knew James had been with his friends the entire week.
Yesterday was the full moon so Lupin would be done with the change, so James would be going
home today.

Regulus looked in the mirror just as he had in September, he found he looked quite different. Not
necessarily his physical appearance, though he did look a lot healthier than he had before school
began, he just looked more full of life. He looked as if he had a reason to live and actually wanted
to. He looked to be equipt for any problems life threw his way, though he wasn't sure that was
necessarily true. He looked, for once, as if there was more to life than this house and this family.
He smiled slightly at the realization.

He had worn a nice black suit and had styled his hair how his mother preferred, attempting to hide
the length that it had grown in the past few months. He made sure to take off the bracelet, as it
would be instantly pointed out by some member of his family, for its ghastly red color.

He checked that his mental shields were in place before he went down to the dining room for
Christmas Eve dinner. When he reached the dining room he saw that his cousins had not yet
arrived and only his parents, his aunt, and his uncle were there. His uncle Cygnus and father Orion
were dressed similar to himself, in severe suits, with his being just a bit newer and more
fashionable. His mother was wearing a dark blue dress with her raven hair pinned tight to her head,
she had a scowl on her face as usual. His aunt Druella was dressed in a pink dress, with her hair in a
half-up, half-down style, that he was sure his mother despised.

His mother seemed to notice him first from her position in the dining room. She fixed her cold grey
stare on him and motioned with her hand for him to come, “Regulus, come greet your aunt and
uncle.”

Regulus fixed a fake smile on his face and walked to his aunt Druella first. She was always the
least frightening authority figure in the room. She was slightly more friendly than his own parents
but had a penchant for blurting out blunt truths. His mother always referred to her as the family
idiot, which he thought was a bit harsh. He took aunt Druella's offered hand and kissed the top,
“Aunt Druella it's lovely to see you again.”

Druella smiled slightly and in her typical flighty tone, which his mother referred to as pretentiously
false, she replied, “Hello dear, how lovely it is to see you again. My how you've grown so tall and
you have clearly gained some weight as well.”

Typical Druella and her backhanded compliments. He knew that he was nowhere near overweight.
In fact, he finally looked like he wouldn't blow over with a stiff breeze. He knew whether it was
true or not, his mother would despise a criticism of her child. Not because she was protective of
him of course, but because criticism of her child was a criticism of herself.

Regulus didn't know why Druella and his mother hated each other so much, but they had for as
long as he could remember. His mother made scathing comments about Druella’s general
disposition and Druella remarked coldly on how well Walpurgas house was kept. Regulus truly
didn't know why they despised each other as such but he usually pretended not to notice. That's
what his uncle Cygnus did, pretending the argument between his sister and wife didn't exist.
Sometimes that denial worked in Regulus’s favor, like right now when he jumped into the
conversation, “Oh Druella a man is supposed to have some meat on his bones. That’s what makes
him a man and not a housewife.”

Cygnus slapped Regulus on the back as he spoke and Regulus tried not to wince at the friendly
“pat” that would surely turn into a bruise. He decided to greet his uncle, before his mother or
Druella could start an argument about housewives. Strictly speaking, they were both housewives,
not that they ever had to do any household chores since both families possessed house-elves. He
turned to his uncle Cygnus and shook the man's hand with a firm grip, “Uncle Cygnus, it’s good to
see you.”

The man laughed a bit, clearly in a better mood than either of Regulus’s parents. Cygnus was
always a bit more relaxed than his sister, who was almost always uptight. He seemed to get a sick
enjoyment out of vexing his sister. Cygnus had once told Regulus that Orion and he used to tease
her a lot when they were kids and that's why she was so upset about marrying his father. Regulus
had always assumed it was because they were first cousins.

Regulus turned to greet his father and shook his hand as well. His father of course said nothing to
him, but nodded slightly, before joining Cygnus in a discussion of politics. As he turned to his
mother, the floo connected to the dining hall flamed and his uncle Alphard stepped out.

He was a bit surprised to see his uncle, as his mother had not mentioned him in her note and he
only occasionally made it to family gatherings. His mother went to greet him immediately and then
Cygnus of course since they were his siblings. He moved to greet him when his mother waved him
over. He stuck out his hand for his uncle to shake and Alphard just laughed and pulled Regulus into
a bone-crushing hug.

He wasn't sure why he was so surprised, this was almost always how Alphard had greeted him, of
course, he hadn't seen his uncle since he became heir. Heirs were not supposed to show affection
towards family. His uncle never really cared about those rules and found enjoyment in toeing the
line of propriety.

Immediately after his uncle let go, Walpurga began scolding her brother for the behavior, but soon
was distracted by the floo flaring and his cousins stepping through. Bellatrix was heard
immediately as she shrieked out, “Ickle Reggiekins! The heir of the noble and ancient house of
Black! How wonderful of you to grace us with your presence.”

She practically skipped over to him ruffling his hair and squeezing his shoulder so hard there was
sure to be a bruise. No one said a word about her insane behavior, beyond basic greetings to her
and her husband Rudolphus. Everyone in this house knew Bellatrix along with Narcissa’s chosen
mate, Lucius, were at the right hand of the Dark Lord. No one would dare scold her.
Regulus greeted both his cousins and their mates, taking note that Narcissa wouldn't meet his eye
and Lucius smiled too brightly at him. He had wondered whether she had told him of Regulus’s
letter, but now he felt she must've. Why else would the man be smiling at him in that way? He had
never paid much attention to Regulus before.

They all sat down for dinner as Kreacher, as well as Cynus and Druella’s house-elf, Tinsy served
them. The main topic of conversation seemed to be how business was going for all adults working
for the Dark Lord, no exact details of course, but enough so Regulus got the point. After all, if you
can't tell your family whom you are torturing, who can you tell?

Then the conversation moved on to Narcissa and Lucius's wedding, in which Regulus stayed silent
and stared at his plate the entire topic. Apparently, the wedding was to be held at the Malfoy
gardens in July. After that, the conversation wafted to uncle Alphard and his thriving magical
furniture business. His mother of course scoffed at the idea but after hearing the amount of money
her brother seemed to be making, her expression turned less severe. After all her son was the heir
of the family and would be inheriting all of it.

Then the conversation eventually shifted to Regulus as Lucius asked, “Regulus tell me, what do
they make of all this in school?”

Regulus tilted his head in slight confusion, “All of what?”

Rudolphus jumped in with a disgustingly throaty laugh, “The war, boy. What is old Albus telling
everyone about the war?”

“Oh, well he has been making more speeches as of late about the impending darkness falling on
the school. And how the students must be diligent about making the correct choices.”

Bellatrix let out a shriek of laughter, “The correct choices? I think we all know what he thinks the
correct choices are, that old coot. Well, he won't be a problem for long.”

The adults all seemed to find that amusing, laughing cruelly. Alphard and Narcissa seemed less
amused but let out polite laughter anyways. His mother did not laugh, not that she ever did, but she
had her gaze fixed on Regulus, “And are you making the correct choices, Regulus?”

Regulus furrowed his eyebrows at her choice of words, his mind flashing back to her words in the
letter about them catching up later. Did she know something? He responded as confidently as he
could, “Of course mother. I know perfectly well what the CORRECT choices are, more than
Dumbledore does anyhow.”

She nodded slightly and Regulus was surprised by a snippy remark from Narcissa, who was
usually his ally at family gatherings, “And you always know what's best, don't you Reggie?”

Regulus felt his eyes snap to his cousin and she gave him a pointed glare that seemed to confuse
everyone at the table. Narcissa and he had always been close and they no doubt did not expect this
attitude from her. His mother scoffed at the nickname she had always despised, Narcissa usually
didn't call him that because she knew his parents disliked it. His father finally spoke directly to him
for the first time all evening, “What have you done to upset your cousin, boy?”

Regulus tried to close off his expression of shock before anyone saw it. His father barely spoke to
him unless it was regarding family duties and this is what he chooses to bring up. Just as Regulus
opened his mouth to respond, Narcissa speaks, “He has been very lax in his letter writing to me this
year, that's all. As his favorite cousin, I think I warrant more than one letter in four months.”

Regulus looked at Narcissa and she looked back at him, her eyes full of meaning. He knew that it
meant that while she was still mad at him, she would not bring it up to the family. He thanked
Merlin that Narcissa was the nicest cousin or he’d been in deep shit right now. His mother pursed
her lips and bit out, “Yes, he has not been writing to us either, the ungrateful brat.”

Regulus looked down at his plate before responding, “I am sorry for not writing you more often,
mother.”

His father spoke once again, “Don't you think you owe your cousin an apology as well? For
upsetting her so close to her upcoming nuptials, she has enough to worry about. Don't make her life
more difficult by being an unsupportive cousin.”

Regulus fought the redness that threatened to climb up his cheeks at being berated in front of his
family, he could hear Rudolphus and Bellatrix laughing. He looked up at Narcissa, who held a bit
of pity in her gaze, “I am sorry dear cousin, it was wrong of me to cause you undue stress. Please
accept my deepest apologies.”

She forced a tight smile before responding in a fake light voice, “That's quite all right Regulus. Just
please do write me more when you go back to school.”
Regulus got the hint, she was going to write him about his letter to her. Lucius spoke once more,
obviously not enjoying the change of topic, “So now that that business is settled. Regulus tell me,
what do you imagine yourself doing after school? I have heard you are quite bright.”

“Genius, is what I have heard.” Alphard voiced, smiling at Regulus in an infectious way.

Lucius looked impressed, “Really?”

Regulus smiled politely at the two men, “I am not quite sure that genius is correct, but yes I do
well.”

“When one receives a compliment, it is incredibly rude to argue, Regulus. I thought I taught you
better, but it seems you are forgetting everything I taught you.”

Regulus's eyes snapped to his mother's glare and he felt fear creep up his spine. Alphard spoke
next, obviously trying to repair the damage, “Sister I take no offense. Modesty is a wonderful
quality to have.”

“Not in this house.”

Suddenly Bellatrix was laughing manically beside him, “Oooh I sense that ickle Reggie is in
trouble.”

No one said a word, but Rudolphus did laugh. Lucius looked surprisingly contrite for his part in
bringing up this awkward moment. Regulus wasn't even sure why Lucius had wanted to ask him so
many questions tonight. Uncle Cygnus, thank god, changed the subject, “Now Lucius what do you
think of these exploits in Albania?”

For the rest of dinner Regulus sunk down in his chair and attempted to disappear. He had done
nothing wrong tonight, yet everything he had said seemed to invoke a response from his mother
and father as if they were trying to pick a fight with him. He wasn't sure if it was the nostalgia of
all the Christmas’ that ended in a fight with Sirius that was driving their anger, but it was clear they
wanted to have a problem with Regulus.

He didn't think that it was fair for them to pick apart every sentence he had said and turn it into
something they could use against him. He knew one thing for sure, he would be getting a dressing
down after dinner. He hoped that was as extreme as it would get.

After dinner he said his goodbyes to everyone, a few of his goodbyes were notable. Uncle Alphard
had encouraged Regulus to write him while enveloping him in another hug. Narcissa had made
sure to let him, know that she would be expecting a response to the next letter she sent. Lucius had
encouraged him to reach out if he ever was curious about the Dark Lord, which had Regulus about
to fall over in shock. Why the hell was Lucius recruiting Regulus to the Dark Lord's' army?

Once everyone left, Kreacher began clearing the table and Regulus stood, waiting to be dismissed
by his parents. He stood rigid back as his mother focused her attention on him. She walked towards
him slowly and Regulus was reminded of a predator stalking its prey, “Well that was an interesting
night, wasn't it Regulus?”

Regulus let out a shaky breath, trying to alleviate his nerves, “Yes mother, it was lovely.”

She stopped a few feet from him, her face blank of emotion, “Lovely? Interesting word choice for a
man. Not something I have ever heard your father or Cygnus say before.”

Regulus wasn't sure what to say, to the insinuation that he wasn't acting manly, so he didn't speak.
His mother didn't seem to mind any, “Then again you, my dear son, you have always been a bit
more…sensitive than most. Don't you agree?”

Regulus wasn't sure if she wanted him to agree or disagree, “I wouldn't use the word sensitive, no. I
would say more thoughtful.”

She pulled an uncharacteristic smile, that sort of scared Regulus, “Thoughtful, what a….lovely
word for it.”

Instantly Regulus felt a pang in his head, of someone digging through his memories. She grabbed
his shoulder to hold him still as his memories were ripped apart. She had never been all that careful
with his head before, but it was clear now that she was looking for something and didn't care how
she found it. He wasn't sure what she found but when she pulled back she began laughing, loudly.

Regulus darted a nervous glance to his father, but he could only see an uncaring frown fixed on the
man's face. His mother smiled at him once more, “Oh darling, you look frightened. That's
ridiculous, you know I would never do anything to you, that you didn't deserve. You know that
right?”
Regulus swallowed what felt like a baseball-sized lump in his throat, “Yes of course, mother.”

“Good.” She looked back to his father, “Orion dear, did you know that our baby boy has learned
occlumency and he's quite good if I do say so myself.”

Regulus froze at the realization that she had noticed his layers, she had dug deep enough to see the
pattern of his occlumency. Orion grunted his acknowledgment but spoke no reply. His mother
didn't seem to care as she reached up and stroked his cheek, “Now Regulus, why would you keep
such an impressive talent from mommy.”

Walpurga Black had never referred to herself as a mommy in his life. She was toying with him. She
knew something and she wanted to torture him with it. His throat croaked as he spoke, “I am sorry
mother. I did not think you would be interested.”

“You didn't think I would be interested? Why would I not be interested in the only thing you've
excelled at in your entire life?”

He flinched slightly at the barb, but she continued, “I mean honestly Regulus, can you name
anything else as all that you are exceptional at?”

Regulus didn't respond, but she pushed, “Answer me, boy!”

Regulus felt like crying. He had felt physical punishment from Walpurga but she usually didn't
demean him in this way. He cleared his throat slightly, but his voice still came out like a whisper,
“I-I–”

“Speak up! For Merlin sakes be bold for once in your pathetic life.”

Regulus attempted a bold voice but he knew she was right, he sounded pathetic, “No, I can't think
of anything else I am exceptional at.”

She smiled once again, “Right. You can’t think of anything that you are exceptional at, besides
keeping secrets from your mother.” His eyes snapped from the floor to hers, “You are an
exceptional liar, Regulus Black. At the very least we can say that about you. Regulus Black
painfully ordinary, but a pretty good liar.”

“Mum I–”

“Silence. If I want to hear another lie come from your lips then I will ask for it. Do you understand
me?”

Regulus nodded and looked back at the floor, wondering briefly if he was about to die.

His mother circled him, while his father stood off to the side. It was a scene reminiscent of every
other punishment that was dealt out in this family. His mother dealt out punishment while his
father stood to the side, saying nothing.

She was back to her sickly sweet taunting voice as she asked, “Now Regulus, is it acceptable to lie
to our mothers?” At Regulus' head shake, she continued, “Do you think that you deserve to be
punished.” Regulus nodded, and could feel a trail of tears sliding down his face as she spoke again,
“How severe of punishment do you think your lies deserve? You can answer this one.”

Regulus knew what answer his mother wanted, “As severe as you believe is necessary mother.”

She stepped in front of him and grasped his face, wiping his tears, “Oh Regulus. You weak little
boy. Crying when you haven't even received your punishment yet.”

He was weak. He was pathetic. He was talentless. Everything his mother told him was true and he
despised himself.

“Now, why don't you tell your father what you've been lying about?”

Regulus faltered, he had no idea what she had found in his head. Had she found James, as deep as
he was? Did she make it down to Remy? Or was all this over Evan? He stuttered, “I-I-It–”

His mother let out a loud cackle-like laugh, “He's told so many lies, he isn't sure which ones we
know. Absolutely pathetic. Why don't I give you a hint since you are our precious heir? I know that
you aren't friends with the Rosier boy and I know why.”
Regulus froze, she knew why, meaning she knew about Remy. He was going to die tonight. He
was never going to see Remy again? Or Barty? Or James? Or even stupid Evan? He had played
with fire and it was his turn for the roasting pit.

“Now tell me Regulus what punishment do you think associating with mudbloods calls for?”

Regulus began speaking before he even thought his next words through, “She not a mud–”

Slap

His mother slapped him across the face as hard as she could, he almost fell over. His cheek burned
and he felt more tears prickling. His mother's voice dropped the taunting tone and it was pure rage
in her voice now, “Never talk back to me! And never defend that mudblood in my house! I can't
believe that you have the nerve to take our name and drag it through the mud in this way. Shame
on you!”

Slap

Slap

She slapped and backhanded him consecutively, the backhand made him fall to the floor clutching
his face. She pulled out her wand, “This out to teach you to respect your parents and our last name.
Silvexio !”

Suddenly Regulus felt as if the skin on his arm was melting and he was screaming. He was
screaming for someone to help him. His father to help him. His mother to stop the curse as it
spread its way through his body. He screamed and cried for anyone to save him. He begged,
“Please! Please mom stop! I'm sorry! Please dad help me! Please! Please! Please!”

His screams and pleads fell on deaf ears as his parents stood there watching him in agonizing pain,
unflinchingly. His mother finally pulled off the curse and Regulus tried to catch his breath between
sobs. He looked down at his skin expecting it to be charred and melted, but it was fine. He was
fine, but the pain was real.
He lay on the ground curled up in on himself as his mother bent over him. In her sickly sweet
voice, she spoke, “Now Regulus why would you make me do that? Do you really think I enjoyed
that? Do you think I really wanted to punish my son? If you would just behave then none of this
would have to take place and I wouldn't have to do this unpleasant task.”

Regulus whimpered and croaked out, “I'm sorry mom.”

She leaned down and stroked his hair, “I know honey. Now, why don't you tell us the name of your
little friend?”

Regulus felt his muscles tighten at her words. Remy, they would hurt her. All over the news
muggle-borns and half-blood families were getting attacked. They would make her a target if they
knew. He didn't know how much Evan had told his parents about this, but he hoped to Merlin he
hadn't said her name. Or her entire family was dead.

Regulus shook his head. He would absolutely never give his mother her name. She growled out,
“Oh really? Apparently, you need another lesson. Varicol !”

Regulus had never heard of that spell before but it didn't take long before he knew what it did.
Suddenly he couldn't breathe, there was something stuck in his throat that he couldn't get out. He
was choking to death. He got on his knees and attempted to dig his fingers in his mouth to dislodge
the item, but there was nothing there. He was choking on air.

His mother watched him struggle until the world started going black behind his eyes. That's when
he heard her say, “ Anapneo !”

His airways cleared and he could breathe again. He greedily took deep breaths of air, sucking in the
cool oxygen while he still could.

It continued like this for a while. His mother demanded he tell her who the mudblood was and
tortured him when she didn't get her answer. He considered lying about the name but he knew that
would only make another family a target. He wasn't sure how many times he had been seared by
his mother's wand or choked, but it was enough that he could no longer stand as the pain had
exhausted him.

She demanded again, “Regulus Black, if you do not tell me what that mudbloods name is, then you
will feel a lot more than lightheaded or hot.”
Was she kidding? Lightheaded and hot, like that summed up those spells. What would she do if
they were turned on her? He didn't respond to her, he had given up shaking his head long ago when
he hear it. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing but it rang clear as day, “ Crucio !”

They say the unforgivable curses are so terrible because to say them, the caster really has to mean
them. They have to want to cause pain, control, or even murder. They say that the stronger want is,
the more pain they want to inflict. Regulus really didn’t know how true that was because he had
only felt one of them and this was his first time.

The pain didn't hit him right away, as surprising as that sounds. Or maybe it did hit him, but it was
so shocking that he didn't feel it until a few seconds in. Then it was the most excruciating feeling
he had ever felt in his life. It overshadowed every emotional, physical, and psychological pain he
had ever experienced. All he felt was agony. Every nerve and cell in his body were both on fire and
bursting at the same time.

Regulus felt as if he might die to from the Cruciatus curse, even though it had never happened
before. Though there were many cases of madness developing from the use of the Cruciatus curse.
He felt as if his limbs were shutting down and all he could do was writhe on the floor. He wasn't
sure if he was screaming or not. He probably was but he couldn't hear anything except white noise.
He wasn't sure how long she kept the curse on him because even when she took it off, he was still
on fire.

She spoke to him but the white noise in his head didn't allow him to hear a word she said, though
he could guess. He wasn’t sure how long the curse was off him before she decided that his silence
wasn't good enough. Suddenly he felt the white-hot pain coursing through him again.

This one was different somehow. He was in agonizing pain, it honestly felt as if his bones were
being shattered over continuously. As if knives were being stabbed into every part of his body over
and over again. Somehow he sunk into the pain this time, he knew he was just twitching on the
ground. He probably looked like a lifeless corpse that was having after-death shocks.

That was probably the reason his mother took the curse off and didn't put it back on again. He
could vaguely hear his mother and father arguing but he couldn't move any part of his body. He
didn't know how long he sat there before a figure was leaning over him. He had the startling idea
that it was Sirius. It looked like him through his tear-soaked eyes. When his vision cleared and he
was met with the picture of a monster, his mother not Sirius.

How could he have mistaken Sirius and his mother? Sirius wasn't here? Regulus had heard of the
Cruciatus cure causing insanity and he worried that he had lost his mind by giving in to the curse.
When he finally focused on his mother's words he heard, “If I hear about you talking to such filth
again I will drag you out of that school so fast, you'll get whiplash. If you step another toe out of
line Regulus, I am not kidding. Kreacher, take this pathetic boy back to Hogwarts, I don't want to
look at his face until Summer.”

Regulus didn't know how he had gotten there, but he was in the bed of his room, while Kreacher
was packing his stuff in his trunk.

Then suddenly he was at the school, in the infirmary with a worried face leaning over him and all
Regulus could think was that he was never going to step foot in Grimmauld Place again.

*********************************************************

James

James was having an amazing break with the Mauraders. They had spent their time ice skating,
having snowball fights, and sneaking in liquor from Hogsmeade. James found he really enjoyed
Hogwarts like this, when it was silent and empty. He was less excited now that his friends had
gone.

Peter had left early this morning to meet Magdalene so he could spend Christmas with her family.
Sirius and Remus had both left for Andromeda’s house around late afternoon, once Remus felt
good enough to leave the hospital wing.

Now there was just James left. His parents had sent him a letter a couple of days ago that they had
decided to visit his aunt and uncle, but they would be back late Christmas Eve, so he should come
back Christmas morning instead. He figured there was really nothing wrong with that, as he got
more time to pack but now he was sort of bored.

It had been a while since he had finished dinner and most of the staff that was still at Hogwarts
were wasted. He loved seeing his professors drunk, so that part was fun. Now though, he was just
sitting in his room organizing his stuff into his trunk.

It was around nine o'clock when it happened. His dormitory door burst open and Professor
McGonagall strode in. He stood up quickly wondering what the professor was doing in his room,
particularly since the last time he saw her she was stumbling down drunk. She appeared to have
taken a sobering potion as she was moving just fine now. She seemed worried as she spoke,
“Potter, has Mr. Black gone home?”

James furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “Yes, this afternoon. What's wrong?”

She looked him up and down, sighing, “Oh I suppose this pertains to you as well. Mr. Regulus
Black has just been delivered back to school and he is in the hospital wing.”

James felt his blood freeze and suddenly he was pushing past the professor and running as fast as
he could to the hospital wing. He could hear her calling out to him from behind, but nothing could
stop him from getting there now.

He slammed open the doors to the hospital wing to find Madam Pomfrey at the side of a bed.
Pomfrey looked back at him, shocked that one of the few students in the school right now, had the
audacity to be bursting into her hospital at this time of night. James could care less if any of these
professors saw him and Reg together. All he cared about was finding out he was okay.

James rushed to the side of the bed that Pomfrey wasn't tending to and saw him. He whispered,
“Merlin.”

Regulus looked like he was dead. He was incredibly pale, with sweat all over his face. His hair was
soaked through and messy. His lips, which were usually a pretty pink color were blueish. His eyes,
which were opened, stared into nothing, unresponsive. If it weren't for the fact that he could see
Regulus breathing he would think the boy was dead.

Professor McGonagall seemed to have finally made it because when he looked up both women
were staring at him in shock, “What happened?”

McGonagall spoke in a very careful tone, “We were all down the Great Hall when suddenly one of
the house-elves from the kitchens requested Madam Pomfrey. She wasn't sure if one of the elves
was hurt, but they dragged her up to the hospital wing where she found Regulus. She sent down for
me, and his house-elf told us the whole story.”

James spoke wanting to verify that this had happened in Regulus’s own house, “Kreacher?”

Madam Pomfrey nodded, “I believe that was his name. He told us that his mistress had requested
he bring the young sir back to school, but he didn't think the boy should be alone. He had to punish
himself for telling us but he said something about the Cruciatus curse along with other forms of
torture, were used on the boy.”

James couldn't believe it as he looked down at the man he loved. Regulus had been tortured, for
what? Had they found out about James and him? Was it punishment for loving a blood traitor or
for loving another boy?

James sank to his knees and grabbed Regulus’s hand bringing it to his lips. He began sobbing, big
sobs that made his whole body shake. It was his fault. It was all his fault.

James didn't know how long he cried but he hadn't even noticed a chair being summoned. They
must've maneuvered him on the chair so he could hold Regulus’s hand easier.

James felt ridiculous for falling apart when he needed to be there for Regulus at the moment, “Is he
going to be all right?”

Madam Pomfrey gave him a gentle look, before nodding, “He will be okay, physically. The curse
wasn’t held on him long enough to cause long-term nerve damage. I gave him some potions to
counter-effect the strain on his muscles and tendons. I also gave him a potion to induce sleep, as I
think that would be the most beneficial thing for him at the moment. He will be okay by tomorrow
afternoon, but I should warn you, Mr.Potter. He might have significant psychological issues after
this incident. The Cruciatus curse can easily cause someone to go mad, but we just have to hope
that he will be okay.”

James wanted to cry again as he looked at Regulus, who looked more asleep than dead after the
potions he was given, but he knew he had no more tears left to cry in his system. He couldn’t
believe that a mother would do this to her own child. That she would torture him and then cast him
off like garbage. She was the most heinous person alive and James vowed to make her pay.

He looked up to Professor McGonagall, who held an expression of pity, “What is going to happen
to them?”

Professor McGonagall looked slightly confused as she asked, “What are you talking about, dear?”

“His parents, what is going to happen to them? They can’t get away with abusing their son, can
they?”
She pursed her lips, as if she was holding back what she really wanted to say, “You are sure it was
his parents who did this to him?”

James couldn’t believe she was really asking that. It was so obvious who did this, “It was her. You
know it was Professor. Just like the scars Sirius and he have, she’s fucking abusive. She deserves
to rot in Azkaban for even using an Unforgivable, let alone on someone defenseless.”

She looked at Madam Pomfrey, and the two seemed to be having some silent discussion before she
turned back to James, “You are right, of course, I will talk to the Headmaster immediately.”

She turned and left, seemingly to go talk to the Headmaster. Madam Pomfrey continued to test
Regulus until she was satisfied that he would be okay through the night. She allowed James to stay
with him, holding his hand. James didn’t sleep a wink, thinking about all the ways he could get
back at Walpurga Black for not only what she did to Regulus but Sirius as well.

This was all bringing back memories of what had happened to Sirius last Christmas and it scared
him to death. While Sirius had always wanted to leave that house, last Christmas had been the last
straw before he left. Regulus had never once mentioned wanting to leave, and it scared James that
the man he loved, might choose to go back to that house.

For the first time in James’s entire life, he wished that someone was well and truly dead, Walpurga
Black.
 Christmas Part 2
Chapter Notes

Sorry this chapter took me so long. I have been crazy busy with school the past couple
weeks, but I am officially graduating from college in two days! YAYYYY! I am also
doing some editing of my earlier chapters, as I think they were a bit rushed. So if you
happen to be rereading at any point, don't be alarmed by any changes you see in the
chapters, they more than likely won't be huge changes. I probably will mostly be
adding details and rearranging things to make more sense. I have finished with chapter
one and I am about halfway done with chapter two so far. Anyways, sorry for my long
note, I hope you all enjoy the chapter!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Reggie

The first thing that Regulus saw when he woke up, was a blinding light. It was so bright that
opening his eyes was painful, so he closed them quickly. He was busy cursing at how harsh the
morning light could be when he realized that the morning light never actually penetrated
Grimmauld Place. Where the hell was he?

Memories of the previous night flashed behind his eyes in excruciating detail. The painfully
awkward and anxiety-filled dinner, complete with biting comments from both his parents. His
mother made him stay in the dining room after the guests had left, twisting his words into a trap.
His father watched, expressionless, as his mother tortured him. Most of all he remembered the
pain, more pain than he had ever felt in his life.

He remembered the exact moment he discovered that his parents didn't care for him and they never
had. No parent that had ever had any love for their child would have done what they had done to
them. He supposed that he had always suspected that they didn't really care for him, but he had
been holding out hope that they did, deep down. That was probably because he had always
assumed that if your parents can’t love you, then no one can.

That was until he met James, who loved him enough to make up for the love he had never gotten
from his parents. James looked past his many faults and loved him despite them. He recalled the
thoughts he had of James the night before, while his mother was torturing him. That hadn’t
happened until he had sunk into his mind during the curse finding anything that could help him
avoid the pain.

He had thought of James's crooked smile whenever Regulus said something sarcastic. He thought
of the way James would always ruffle his hair whenever he saw Regulus, thinking it made him
look cool. He thought of the way James’s eyes sparkled whenever Regulus complimented him,
which he would be the first to admit he didn't do enough. He thought of the way James's hands
would flex whenever he wasn't sure what to say next. He thought about how lucky it was that his
mother hadn’t found out about James, not for his own sake though. He would be damned if he ever
let his mother harm, James Potter.

The last thing he really remembered about the previous night was his mother's face staring down at
him, disgusted. Disgusted at him, at his pain and tears. How unbelievable was that? That he was
the one who she was disgusted with, between the two of them.

His muscles ached and his head was pounding but beyond that, he really felt okay, surprisingly. He
wasn't sure how that was even possible after what had taken place the night before. Kreacher
must’ve taken care of him after his mother left the dining room. He was so grateful for his house-
elf.

He figured that it was better not to scare Kreacher any further by sleeping longer than he already
had. As he opened his eyes, he was blinded by the same daylight as before, wondering how
Kreacher had gotten the light to shine this bright in his room. Once his eyes adjusted to the
blinding light he was taken aback by the room that was clearly not in Grimmauld Place.

That was when he realized that he was at Hogwarts, in the hospital wing. What the hell had
happened? How had he gotten here? Where was his mother? He looked around searching for clues
as to how he could have possibly gotten to Hogwarts. He saw his suitcase on the end table in front
of him, which meant he had packed before leaving. That was just before he noticed the young man
dozing in the chair next to him, with his hand resting inches from Regulus’ own.

James. James was here, next to him. All thoughts of anything bad melted away as he stared at the
man he loved. He never thought he would feel this way about anyone, but here was the proof.
Whenever he saw James Potter's face, whether it be a glance in the corridor or a night spent with
one another, his heart would swell and he would feel so much stronger than he felt alone. James
made him strong even though he had spent his entire life feeling weak. No one would ever make
him feel the way James did. He was Regulus’s everything and Regulus knew he always would be.

His mother had called him weak the night before, many times, and while she was spitting those
poisonous words at him, he believed them. Now though, with James by his side, he knew that she
was wrong. He only wished she could see how strong he could be with just a hint of support.
Maybe if she would've tried supporting and loving him, while he was growing up, then he would
be the heir she wanted now.

As Regulus looked at James, he noticed how exhausted the other boy looked. His hair was even
more of a fright than it usually was, he had deep bags under his eyes, and he was in his pajamas.
Regulus could guess what had happened the night before. Kreacher must’ve brought him to school,
he hoped the elf wouldn't get punished for going behind his mother's back, no matter how grateful
he was to be out of that house.

Then the staff must've found him and brought James, that part he really couldn't figure out. Unless
they meant to get Sirius and James overheard, but he didn't see Sirius anywhere.

He would like to think that if the professors told Sirius that Regulus was injured, his older brother
would come. He had come the last time Regulus was injured, but that wasn't during the holidays.
Maybe he didn't want to be bothered to visit when he had better plans. At least he had James he
could count on though.

Except James had more than likely seen him at his worst last night and that scared Regulus. Oh
Merlin, what had he been like? James looked exhausted, had Regulus scared him? Of course, he
had scared him, Regulus had promised that he would come back unharmed. Instead, James had to
witness what he was sure was a terrible sight, the after-effects of the Cruciatus curse.

Merlin, poor James. This wasn't fair to him, after he had begged and pleaded with Regulus not to go
home because he knew Regulus would come back hurt. He had completely dismissed James's fears
the last time they had talked and now all his fears had come true. He felt sick to his stomach as he
stared at James’s weary face.

Regulus moved his hand so that it was ghosting over James’s palm, wondering if it was more
imperative to apologize or let him sleep. His guilt won over as he clasped his hand with James’s,
causing the boy to stir. As James’s eyes slowly fluttered open, his beautiful hazel eyes flickered to
Regulus’s face. His tired expression vanished as he hopped up immediately, and began fussing over
Regulus.

“Baby are you okay? How are you feeling? Merlin, you scared me so much, you have no idea. I
was so worried for you. I love you so much, Reggie. Please don't scare me like that again.”
James’s voice was missing its usual arrogant tone, instead, he sounded like he was pleading with
Regulus. Regulus’s heart ached for causing James this worry. He felt the tears crawl down his face
as James put his hand on his cheek softly.

James leaned down kissing Regulus’s face gently, he kissed the trails from the kisses, “Talk to me,
sweetheart. Where does it hurt? I'll go grab Madam Pomfrey, she will help you. I promise baby.”

As James turned towards Madam Pomfrey's office, Regulus grabbed his wrist unable to be alone
for even a minute now that he was awake. Unable to be without James for even a second in his
current state. James looked down at Regulus’s hand on his wrist, “Honey I promise I'll only be
gone for a second. Please, she needs to look you over.”
Regulus shook his head and James sighed before pulling his chair closer so that he could be right
next to Regulus’s head, “Okay I'll stay, don't worry.”

Regulus felt the panic dissipating as James sat back down next to him, his hand clutching the other
boy’s. He tried to speak but his throat wouldn't allow it, his words sounding like whispers. James
summoned a glass of water and Regulus drank greedily. When he finally spoke, his voice came out
in a croak, probably from all the screaming he had done the night before, “I-I am so sorry, James.”

James frowned, bringing their clasped hands to his face, kissing Regulus’s knuckle delicately,
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Bunny.”

Regulus hiccuped a bit, the tears streaming down faster than they had before. He felt as if he was
on the verge of sobbing, holding himself from that particular brand of patheticness. James was so
damn good to him, that it was hard to admit he had betrayed his trust. “I do. I-I told you that I
would come back from break unharmed.“ His throat became tight and he struggled to get the next
words out, “And I didn't, I am so sorry to have put you through that. You didn't deserve that.”

James looked wrecked. Which made Regulus feel even worse, because really if there was one
place a frown didn't belong, it was on James Potter's face. James leaned closer to Regulus and
reached out a hand to lightly run through Regulus’s curls. His voice cracked and there were tears in
his eyes as he said, “I don’t deserve this? Merlin Reggie, you think it matters if I am sad, when you
just went through the worst night of your life? Don't worry about me, I just want you to be okay.
You didn't break your promise, because it wasn't your choice what happened to you. I am so sorry
that this happened to you. I wish I was there to protect you. I should have been there to protect
you.”

James was sobbing by the end of his speech, body-wracking sobs that made his entire body shake
with distress. He buried his head in Regulus’s chest, leaning over from his chair. Even though
Regulus had only just spoken his own guilt and apologies, he found himself comforting James to
the best of his ability. He ran his hand through James’s messy hair, cooing at the boy that it wasn't
his fault. Regulus thought that it was quite obviously not James’s fault but the boy seemed
inconsolable, so Regulus chalked that up to the lack of sleep.

He wasn't sure how long they had sat there, embraced before Madam Pomfrey came in to check on
Regulus. Her eyes were soft and full of emotion when she laid eyes on the two boys holding each
other. Regulus decided that for once he wouldn't try to hide their relationship. He wasn't sure what
James was like the night before, so it would be silly to try to cover up the fact that they were
together, if James had spent the night crying.
Regulus had always thought that Madam Pomfrey was a strict and no-nonsense type of woman and
maybe that was true, but the look in her eyes at the moment made him consider that she might be
softer than he thought. She spoke in a gentle voice, probably attempting to not startle James, even
though he shot up when he heard her voice anyways, “Regulus, are you ready for me to run some
tests on you?”

James stood up and sniffled, wiping tears off his face, before he spoke in his best imitation of a
nonchalance tone, “Madam Pomfrey, his voice is a little rough so if you wouldn’t mind checking
on his throat. You should also probably give him a full-body scan just to make sure nothing else is
wrong, plus maybe a brain scan? Is that a possibility?”

Regulus almost let out a giggle, he probably would have if he hadn’t felt so wretched, at James’
pestering of the medi-witch. Madam Pomfrey seemed taken aback by the abrasive questioning she
was receiving from the young Gryffindor.

Regulus had seen Madam Pomfrey shout at students for simply being in her hospital wing without
an injury, but for some strange reason, she seemed to be indulging James and his ridiculous
questions. Regulus once again had to wonder if the medi-witch was sweeter than anyone thought,
as she seemed to realize that James wasn't questioning her out of lack of trust for her skills, but out
of genuine concern for Regulus

She gave James a little smile before shuffling closer to Regulus, “Yes Mr. Potter, I will do all the
scans and tests that are necessary. I appreciate your concern for your… friend, but if you wouldn't
mind stepping out as I need privacy for these tests.”

Regulus felt his stomach boil over with nerves and panic once more. James had to leave the room?
Merlin, he wasn't sure he could take the distance right now. James was quite literally the only thing
holding him together at the moment. James either noticed the panic in his eyes or he also was
panicking from the idea of distancing himself from Regulus at the moment, because stepped closer
to Regulus, standing firm, “Please Madam Pomfrey, can I stay? I promise I won’t be in the way.”

Madam Pomfrey shook her head firmly with a doleful expression. Regulus's fingers twitched,
aching to grab James and hold him close as he could, never letting him go. He spoke in, a slightly
hysterical voice, “Please Madam. Please let him stay. I-I need him here. Please.”

Madam Pomfrey looked down at him calculatingly, deciding whether he seemed pathetic enough,
most likely. He wasn't sure if it was the unhinged expression on his face or his miserable hoarse
pleading that had her relenting, but either way, he was grateful. She told James he had to stand at
least ten feet away, which Regulus didn't love but at least he still had him in his line of sight. He
didn’t know if he could handle having James any further at the moment.
Madam Pomfrey performed a multitude of tests on him, luckily the most discomfort he felt during
them was a slight tickle. She asked him about what he remembered from the night before. He told
her everything he knew, not about to lie to the woman who was helping him. She explained exactly
how he had gotten there last night, which was close to what he thought except apparently Kreacher
was ordered to bring him back to school. She explained how he was practically catatonic when he
arrived, which made him glance guilty at James's tense face. She explained precisely how she had
treated him the night before and what she was seeing in his scans this morning.

She thought that all things considered he looked fairly healthy today. She gave him a few potions
for muscle aches, his migraine, and his throat strain. She also explained that there was one
condition that this incident had created for him, that would continue to affect him past this week.
He had permanent nerve damage in some of his nerve endings from the prolonged use of the
Cruciatus curse. He should be able to function normally provided he takes an acclimating potion
every week for the rest of his life. If he missed taking it for a week, then it would become very
hard for him to perform simple tasks, but as long as he takes it then he should be able to function
normally.

Normally? He would be able to function normally, provided of course that he remember to take
this potion every week for the rest of his life. Heaven forbid he forgets and causes his nerve
endings to deteriorate more. All this because his mother was a cunt, who didn't care whether she
hurt her son or not.

Regulus didn't cry. He wasn't sure that he had it in him to cry anymore. What happened, happened
and Regulus didn't see any reason to cry over it. It could have been a lot worse than it was, so really
he should be grateful. Hah, grateful.

James on the other hand, was crying softly from his position against the opposite wall. He seemed
to be more affected by the news than Regulus was. Regulus had the uncontrollable urge to comfort
the boy, but before he was able to, the large hospital wing door burst open with Professor
Dumbledore and McGonagall striding in.

Madam Pomfrey went to greet them immediately as James rushed back over to Regulus, placing
his hand on his shoulder as if he needed the contact to stabilize himself in front of the professors.

Professor Dumbledore and McGonagall walked closer. Dumbledore spoke in a pitying soft voice,
“Mr. Black, I was very sorry to hear what took place last night and I must apologize I was out of
the castle visiting my brother, otherwise, I would've been here for you. Poppy and Minerva have
updated me on your condition. This was the most terrible situation and I am very sorry that you
have been forced to endure it. We will of course protect you and arrange safety for you, in
whichever way you require it. I must ask though, Regulus, would you like to go back home at the
end of the year?”

James gasped, outraged at the question. McGonagall looked pained and Pomfrey made a little
indignant noise to show her objection. Regulus didn’t say anything and he wasn't shocked or
outraged at the question. It was a fair question, especially for pureblood heirs, as pathetic as that
was. Regulus had been tortured the night before, yes, but he was still the only heir of the house of
Black, meaning that everything in the Black name would be legally his when his father passed.

Most heirs wouldn't pass up on that, except of course Sirius. Sirius had passed on all of the money
and prestige. Regulus used to think about how he would never have done what Sirius had, but that
was before he had actually been put in the position to decide.

He thought about it, really thought about it. If Regulus went back home, as was expected of him at
the end of term, then there was the chance he'd be tortured again and it was very likely he would be
forced to join the Death Eaters, but he would be filthy rich and have a Wizengamot seat handed to
him when his father passed. On the other hand, he could choose not to go home and possibly move
in with James. He would have to deal with Sirius, unfortunately, but he would get to be happy with
the person he loved. He would also be extremely poor and who knows what kind of response his
parents would have.

He looked at James, the boy was staring down at him with a pleading expression. That's what
tipped the scales for Regulus. James, couldn't take it if Regulus went back home because he
couldn't protect him there. Regulus had only been home for a few days and look what had
happened, imagine the whole summer. Regulus might be able to go back into that house himself, of
that he wasn’t even sure, but James certainly could not watch him do it.

He looked back up at Dumbledore, who had a patient expression on his face. Regulus cleared his
throat slightly, in an attempt to sound confident, “No, I don't want to go back home.”

James let out a sigh of relief and squeezed Regulus’s shoulder lightly, clearly approving of
Regulus’ choice. Professor McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey also showed signs of relief, while
Dumbledore remained expressionless. Merlin, he would fit in well with the Black family with that
mask he wore, “Would you like to press charges?”

Regulus didn't know if he could handle pressing charges against his own family, even if they did
deserve it. To have their family business drug all over the wizarding community would tarnish
their name beyond repair, but would he be able to escape without doing it? He cleared his throat,
feeling uncomfortable at the sets of eyes on him, “Can I think about it?”
Dumbledore nodded, with a slight smile, “Of course Regulus. Though I should mention that not
pressing charges could determine whether your family has legal grounds to get you back.”

Regulus nodded because he knew that, but James clearly had not. He blurted out in a rather uncouth
manner, “Wait, so they could make him come back if he doesn't press charges?”

Dumbledore nodded and James turned to Regulus, firmly telling him, “Then you have to press
charges.”

Regulus rolled his eyes at his boyfriend's lack of decorum. He didn’t have to do anything he didn’t
want to do. If he really was going to get out from under his mother's thumb, then he was going to
do it his way, “I said I will think about it, James.”

He did not look happy about Regulus’s response, which led to the two of them glaring at each other
for almost a minute straight. Until James relented, like usual, kissing Regulus on the top of his head
lightly in acceptance. Regulus had almost forgotten there were others in the room because when he
turned forward, he was surprised they had behaved that way in front of the professors. Madam
Pomfrey and Professor McGonagall had a pleasant little smile on their faces while looking at the
two boys, while Dumbledore looked wistful.

Dumbledore cleared his throat, smiling at the two boys, “Well we can discuss the details when you
make your decision. How about we plan to meet the Thursday after term restarts in my office?
Professor Slughorn will escort you on the day. Until then I believe Madam Pomfrey has given you
the all-clear, once you finish taking your potions. So you can go back to the dormitories, but It
would be better if you had someone to keep an eye on you.” He turned to James, with a
mischievous smile, “Mr. Potter, I presume you would be willing?”

James’s eyes widened, and he coughed before agreeing, “Yes, of the course Professor.”

Professor McGonagall stepped forward, “I believe that the Gryffindor dormitory is empty of
students for the break, so it might be easier if Mr. Black stays there with you, Mr. Potter.”

James and Regulus nodded and before they knew it, Regulus was being discharged with strict
instructions to take it easy. They were escorted up to the Gryffindor common room by Professor
McGonagall. Regulus had been there before but he had to pretend to be seeing it for the first time
for Professor McGonagall's sake. James stifled a giggle as Regulus remarked on how red the walls
were for probably the hundredth time.
Professor McGonagall pulled James aside to discuss something with him, but Regulus was sick of
waiting so he just began up the stairs to James's room. When Regulus stepped into the room he
instantly felt comfortable, there was just something about this room that made him feel safe.

Usually, he went straight to James's bed but this time he took his time to look around. He looked at
the bed that must've been Lupins, a messily made bed stacked with books and parchment. Then he
turned to James’s whose bed was always unmade and had clothes littered around it, Regulus would
really have to talk to him about that sometime. Regulus knew that the other messy bed in the room
was his brother's because the mess looked exactly like Sirius's room used to look when they were
younger. There was a carton of cigarettes on his bedside table surrounded by scraps of parchment
that looked to have drawings of Lupin, eww.

Regulus grabbed a cigarette from the pack and wandlessly lit up. He sighed in relief as he inhaled,
letting his worries fade away. He continued exploring the room, walking over to the final bed that
he knew had to be Pettigrew’s. The bed was surprisingly neat, with everything in its designated
place. His bedside table had a framed picture of Pettigrew and a girl, laughing just before they
snogged deeply. He couldn't recall ever seeing the girl, but he figured it must be the boy’s
girlfriend.

He was looking curiously at the vase of flowers beside the picture frame when he felt arms wrap
around his waist from behind. He breathed in the sweet smell of James, leaning back into him.
James placed his head on Regulus’s shoulder looking where Regulus had been, “Lilacs. Peter’s
girlfriend, Magdalene, loves them. He always has them in case she comes over. She’s the one in
the picture, there.”

Regulus nodded as James pointed to the girl in the picture frame again, feeling both relaxed and out
of place. James made him feel at home, but this dorm was so obviously not where he belonged.
Pettigrew seemed to be a diehard romantic, Lupin was a messy scholar, and Sirius, well, Sirius was
apparently an artist at least when it came to drawing his boyfriend. Regulus had never seen his
brother draw in his life, but those drawings weren't half bad.

James turned Regulus around, smiling lightly at him before he noticed the cigarette between his
fingers, “I see you found Sirius’s stash. I usually make him and Moony smoke out the window, but
since you're cute, I'll let it slide this time.”

Regulus attempted a smile at James, but he didn't think it was very convincing. He did appreciate
James’ attempt to make him feel better, “Thanks, Jamie.”

James frowned slightly at him, watching as Regulus finished off his cigarette stubbing it out in the
ashtray by Lupin's bed. When he finished, James grabbed his hand, leading him to his own bed.
When they sat down, James put his arm around Regulus tightly, “I am very proud of you for
making the decision to leave, Reg. It's not easy but I think it's the best thing for you.”

Regulus almost snorted, that was the understatement of the fucking year, “Of course, it's the best
thing for me. Its always been the best thing for me. I just wish I would've fucking done it before
Christmas.”

James furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “So you knew that it would be better for you to be out
of that house? This entire time?”

Regulus rolled his eyes, sometimes James was so dense, “Obviously, I knew that James but I
already told you that if I had left them my mother and father would go after Sirius, and I definitely
didn't want that. I figured I could handle them, I mean I was always able to stay under their radar
before. I'm not about to walk back into that house after what happened, not if I can’t stay under
their radar anymore. Fuck that I am not that stupid, it would be suicide. Sirius is just going to have
to watch his own back from now on.”

Regulus could feel James’s eyes on him for a long moment, before James put his hand on
Regulus's face, turning his head so they were looking at each other. Regulus looked into James’s
beautiful hazel eyes, where there was so much emotion. James leaned forward and pressed a soft
kiss to Regulus’s lips. Regulus felt himself leaning into the kiss, pushing aside every bad thing that
had happened the last 24 hours. This is exactly what he needed, all he needed was for James to be
with him just like this.

James pulled back slowly, softly smiling at him. It was the type of smile that made Regulus’s
stomach twist with nerves. Really James shouldn't still be able to make him feel this way. Wasn’t
the honeymoon faze supposed to end after a couple of months? He wondered if he would ever get
to the stage of their relationship where he got annoyed when James did dumb things, he didn’t
know if that was possible. As of now, even if James acted completely ridiculous, Regulus found it
enduring.

“You never fail to surprise me, love. Don't worry about Sirius, he will be fine. There is no way we
will let your psychotic parents take him.” James leaned and kissed Regulus on the top of the head,
“And I would love to see them try to take you from me, now that I have you.”

Regulus wanted to be irritated at James’ assumption that Regulus was going to stay with him, but
he couldn't stop the smile from slipping onto his face. James smiled back, which only made the
bags under his eyes look more defined. Regulus still felt bad that James had spent the entire night
awake, worrying for him, but he knew James wouldn't have had it any other way.
He faked a yawn, even though he was the farthest thing from tired. He knew that the only way
James would take a nap is if Regulus took one too. James immediately fawned over him, inquiring
whether he was feeling alright and persuading him to rest for the afternoon. Regulus countered that
he would only take a nap if James took a nap with him. It wasn't too hard to convince James to join
him as the Gryffindor was clearly bone tired.

They closed the curtains around the bed to block out some of the light before snuggling in together.
James fell asleep almost instantly when his head hit the pillow, while it took Regulus about an hour
of listening to James’s steady breathing to fall into a deep sleep of his own.

******************************************************************************

Regulus wiped his sweaty palms on his trousers for what seemed like the twentieth time, huffing
frustratedly, “This is a terrible idea. How the hell did I let you convince me to do this?”

“Because you loooove me.” James teased, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

He leaned in and planted a square kiss on Regulus’s lips, unfortunately, that was the moment they
heard, “Jamie, is that you?”

Regulus rocketed himself out of James’s reach because Merlin what a terrible first impression to
make on your boyfriend's mother. James didn't seem bothered by his mother walking in on them,
he let out a booming laugh, while Regulus felt like drowning himself.

Regulus suddenly regretted letting James convince him to join the Potters for their Christmas
celebration. James had been set to go home Christmas day to spend time with his family, but had
owled them almost as soon as he discovered Regulus’ condition. When they had woken up from
their nap on Christmas day, they had talked about everything that had happened and it had been a
painful experience for Regulus.

He had felt some relief when they had exhausted the subject, but he still felt this urging sense of
dread following his every action. James had convinced him that he would feel better if he
experienced a good old-fashioned Potter family Christmas. Originally Regulus had refused
vehemently, but James was too persuasive for his own good. Not long after, James was sending an
owl to his mom, that he would be coming home the day after Christmas to celebrate with them and
he would be bringing a guest.

Regulus remembered how odd it felt to be packing a suitcase to spend the holiday with two people
he had never met before. He had insisted on wearing appropriately elegant clothing. when James
insisted he wears jeans of all things. It would be a cold day in hell when Regulus wore jeans.

Regulus had never been so nervous in his life, what if Mr. and Mrs. Potter hated him? Would
James dump him, if that was the case? Were they anything like James? He had been so nervous for
this moment and he had already fucked it up.

Euphemia Potter had walked into the sitting room at the very moment that they were locked in a
kiss and Regulus couldn't be more mortified. Regulus looked at his boyfriend's mother with a guilty
expression, but was surprised to find, instead of resentment toward the boy who dared to snog her
son in her own house, warmth. Euphemia Potter was a beautiful woman, that much was certain.
She had long brown, surprisingly tame locks and bright hazel eyes just like James’s. She was taller
than many women at five foot nine and she was wearing a horridly festive Christmas sweater with
jeans.

James immediately went to his mother and greeted her with a hug and a kiss, “Mum! It's so great to
see you. I missed you and dad so much. I am sorry about the change of plans.”

Euphemia focused on her son hugging him as tightly as she could, as if she feared he would floo
out of there just as fast as he had come, “Oh darling you couldn't have missed us as much as we
missed you, that would be impossible. Don't worry about the change of plans, in fact, this suits us
better, it's so much more original to celebrate Christmas on Boxing day.”

When they finally parted, Euphemia landed her gaze back on Regulus, eyes glittering with
mischief. She didn't wait for James to introduce Regulus, as she stepped forward with a pleasant
smile on her face, “And you must be Regulus. I have heard so much about you from James’s
letters. I am so happy you are here to spend Christmas with us.”

Regulus only just had enough time to shoot James a glare for writing about him to his mother,
before Euphemia engulfed him in a bone-crushing hug. As tight as the hug was, he found it was
quite enjoyable. She was warm and motherly, and she smelt of Christmas cookies. He couldn't
keep the smile off his face she hugged him tightly.

James stepped in to end the hug rather quickly, much to Regulus’ displeasure, “Mom be careful
with him! He's probably still sore.”

Euphemia pulled back frowning slightly up at him, her face filled with concern for the boy she had
just met, “Oh I'm sorry dear. Are you feeling quite alright?”
He smiled as reassuringly as was possible, even though he was still a bit sore, it felt like a shame to
have this woman frown, “I am okay, thank you for asking. My name is Regulus as you already
know. I am very glad to be spending Christmas with you as well, thank you for having me, Mrs.
Potter.”

She absolutely beamed at him, before turning to James, “Oh he's so polite Jamie! And what a
handsome boy he is, you caught yourself a good one, love.” She turned back to a red-cheeked
Regulus, “You can call me Effie, darling. Do you mind if I call you Reggie?”

Regulus could see James struggling to hold back a laugh at Regulus's face when she asked him. He
had caused a right fuss when James had attempted to call him that for the first time, but for some
reason, he felt like he might let the woman in front of him do whatever she wanted. He wondered if
it was just a Potter thing, that made him forget all of his standards and rules.

He smiled back at her, politely nodding that she could. When James opened his mouth,
undoubtedly to say that Regulus didn't like that nickname, Regulus fixed him with a glare until he
got the point and closed his mouth.

Effie pulled her arm around him and immediately began giving him a tour of the house. It was a
beautifully homey manor, really the polar opposite of Grimmauld Place. It was large and spacious,
and there was so much light let into the house through the many windows. Grimmauld Place was
larger than it seemed on the outside as well but all that space held no candle to the amount of
personality Potter Manor held.

She showed him the whole bottom floor, deciding to skip the bedrooms upstairs because he would
see them later anyway. When she got to the kitchen, it was clear that she was cooking goods and
pastries for Christmas. It was still early in the day so she had plenty of time, but Regulus thought
she might want help anyways, “Effie, would you like some help with your baking?”

She grinned at him, pleasantly surprised, “Oh dear that is so sweet of you. You certainly don't have
to, but I would be happy for the help if you don't mind. Monty isn't going to be home until later this
afternoon and there's just so much to do.”

“Yeah mum, we will help you. We should go put our stuff away first and maybe Reg can change
into something more comfortable quick.”

Effie glanced down at Regulus’s three-piece suit and then to James’s and her own sweater and
jeans, nodding enthusiastically. James smiled at the surprise on her face as she noticed Regulus’s
attire, “I know, mum. I told him that it would be a more casual affair, but he insisted that he had to
make a good impression and he couldn't do that while looking like a beggar.”

Effie laughed, and her eyes twinkled with mischief, “Oh no Reggie, do you think I look like a
beggar?”

Regulus felt his eyes grow to the size of saucers and he immediately began stuttering, “Oh me-
merlin n-no o-of course I d-don't.”

James and Effie both burst out laughing, as if Regulus' near panic attack was amusing in the
slightest. She smiled at him again, in fact, she never really stopped smiling, “Oh sorry honey. I was
just pulling your tail a bit. You look great, but it would be easier for baking if you threw on a
sweater and jeans instead.”

He nodded before James grabbed his hand, dragging him up the stairs. He stopped at one of the
first doors they arrived in, James’s room. Their bags were already sitting by James's bed. It was a
large bedroom that was, of course, covered in red. There were quidditch pictures and photos with
his friends plastered on the wall, plus a few band posters here and there. James’s bed looked to be
queen-sized with a fluffy white comforter, that looked extremely inviting. He also appeared to
have his own record player with stacks of records piling up next to it.

The room was very James, even more than his dorm at school was. Regulus instantly felt at home.
It was amazing how quickly he could become comfortable in a place he had never been but in the
home, he grew up in, he was constantly on edge.

“I like your room. It's very you.”

James grinned at him as he began digging in his closet looking for something, “Thanks, Reggie. I
like it pretty well too.”

Regulus attempted to peer past James, to see what the boy was looking for but as he got closer
James whipped around. He had a messily wrapped package in his hands, large and covered in
brown parchment paper. It had an atrocious-looking bow settled on top. Regulus peered at it in
confusion, “What is that?”

James came closer and held it out to Regulus, waiting for the younger boy's hands to take it from
him. When Regulus had the package in his hands, James explained, “This is your Christmas
present, of course. I would've waited to give it to you until tonight, but I think there will be a good
opportunity to test it out soon.”

Regulus had been so focused on all the bad things that had happened this Christmas that he had
forgotten that James had promised him a present. He peered at the package before slowly sitting
down on James’s bed, and began unwrapping it. It was obviously something soft in the package,
but Regulus never would've guessed what it was.

Sitting inside the brown paper was the softest-looking sweatshirt Regulus had ever seen. It was red
and had the words Gryffindor stamped on the front in an intricate way. Regulus touched the words
on the front, confused beyond belief. Why would James get him a sweatshirt for a house that
wasn't even his own?

He looked up at James and the confusion must've shown on his face, because he immediately
started explaining, “I know that you are probably wondering why I got you this but I really couldn't
help myself. I know you don't want to tell anyone, but I had to see you wearing my name on your
back at least once.”

“It says Potter on the back?” Regulus turned the shirt around abruptly, seeing the name Potter
stamped out in the same intricate writing as the front. He stared at the name, feeling the urge to put
on the soft sweater that would tell anyone who saw him, just who’s boyfriend he was.

He decided not to fight the urge, the last few days had been bad enough without him denying
himself simple pleasures. He set the paper on the bed next to him and shrugged the sweatshirt on,
letting the softness of the fabric wash over him. James grinned at him, Regulus had a feeling that
James was enjoying the sight of him in this sweatshirt, “So? Do you like it?”

Regulus looked at the joy on James’s face, glad that the boy was so easy to please, “I love it Jamie,
thank you. I only wish I could actually wear it at Hogwarts.”

James suddenly got very excited as he hopped onto the bed next to him, beginning to explain why
the sweatshirt was so special. Apparently, James had found a shop that made specialty items and
charmed them so certain people saw different things.

This particular sweatshirt was supposed to show the Gryffindor side, only to those who knew why
Regulus was wearing the sweatshirt. In other words, the people who knew about them being in a
relationship would be able to see that side of the sweatshirt. People who didn't know about them
could only see a Slytherin sweatshirt that had the name Black on the back instead. So theoretically
only James, himself, and Effie should be able to see the Gryffindor side.
Regulus found the idea of the sweatshirt to be very intriguing, although he didn't know if he would
be able to trust it until he tested it out. James seemed ridiculously giddy about the entire gift, “The
reason I had to give it to you now, is because my dad will be home in a couple hours and I told my
mom not to tell him you were coming. I also made sure to double-check that my mum never told
him, the things I had told her about you. So we can test out the sweatshirt when he gets here.”

Regulus was more than a little nervous to meet James’s father, but he had also been nervous to
meet Effie and that had turned out fine. Fleamont Potter had a reputation for being a very nice
gentleman, but Regulus had always thought that the man would be intimidating to meet. The Potter
family had not come from old money like the Black family, but Fleamont Potter's Sleekeazy potion
was a stroke of genius, that had filled their bank vault heftily. Any man who could nearly triple his
family's wealth had to be a very shrewd judge of character and Regulus didn't think he would
measure up.

“Why did you tell your mom about me anyway?” Regulus had been curious ever since he found out
that James wrote to his mom about him. They had never agreed to tell anyone, but he wasn’t mad
that James had told his mother. She seemed to be nothing but supportive of the two and it wasn’t
like they ran in the same circle, so it wouldn’t get back to his friends.

James’ excitement simmered a tad and he threw an arm around Regulus’s shoulder, pulling him
close, smiling fondly at him, “I always tell my mom about the people that I love.”

Regulus’s insides burst into fireworks. No matter what had happened the other night, James still
loved him. He blushed slightly but rolled his eyes as if he thought James’s sweetness was cheesy,
“Sure you do. So you must’ve told her about Evans then?”

James laughed, perpetually thinking Regulus’ sarcasm was funny when really it was all from the
deep bitterness he held for the redhead witch. He spoke in a lovey-dovey tone that Regulus hoped
wasn’t for Evans, “I think I might’ve told mum about Lily in the first year or something, but
otherwise no. I told my mum when I met Sirius, Remus, Peter, and you. In fact, she probably
wishes I would stop writing about you, but I can't help it, I want my mum to know how amazing
you are.”

Regulus definitely couldn't respond to something like that with a sarcastic comment, but he had
been struggling with keeping his emotions bottled up since the incident. It was easy for her to
speak with sarcasm than his actual feelings at the moment. He didn't want to have a breakdown at
the Potter's house and he really didn’t want James to see it if he did. So instead, he would pretend
he was completely fine, suffer through it just like he had that night.

Regulus never responded but he laid his head on James’s shoulder. James leaned, settling his face
against Regulus’s hair, breathing in softly. They sat there for a few minutes before James made
them change so his mother didn't wonder where they were. Regulus wore the sweatshirt and tan
trousers, because again he would never wear jeans.

As they walked back to the kitchen hand in hand, James had an excited skip to his step. When they
walked in, Effie who had pulled on a blue apron regarded them suspiciously, “You boys were up
there for a while. James darling, you know you still have to wear a johnny with Regulus right?”

James gasped looking outraged at his mother's audacity, “Mum!”

Effie laughed loudly, while Regulus was stuck wondering what the hell a johnny was and why
James had to wear one with Regulus. James flushed with embarrassment as Effie handed them
aprons to bake with. Regulus’s was a light pink that he found more flattering than he probably
should have. James’s was yellow, which Regulus thought looked very good on him.

They began baking all kinds of pastries, while Effie put a muggle band, named after a bug, on her
record player. Regulus thought the music was pretty good, though he preferred the ones James had
shown him better. Effie Potter was so different from Regulus’s mother. Not only was she actually a
good mother, but she was so full of life. She danced around the kitchen laughing and joking in a
way that Walpurga would have despised.

Effie was really good about making sure Regulus was involved in the conversation, as well.
Involuntarily, she had gotten him talking about himself, but only the good things somehow. He had
actually told her about his and Sirius’s relationship when they were younger, but she hadn’t made
him discuss anything past the third year. She asked James and him about when they started seeing
each other, which was a complicated answer. She seemed to adore the sweatshirt James had got
Regulus, because she kept touching the name on the back, before ruffling his hair.

In turn, he had actually asked her some questions about where she and her husband grew up, her in
Brighton and him in Mumbai where his extended family lives. He asked her about their house-elf
and where she was, to which she explained that Dorry and she usually cooked together, but Dorry
was visiting some family for the holiday. Regulus asked her about how she had met Mr. Potter in
their fourth year. He asked why she didn't like to use any magic in her baking, she said that it tastes
better without, but Regulus had never noticed a difference.

At one point in their baking, James began eating the treats more than he was contributing to
actually making them. Effie had moved close to Regulus, whispering, “This is what he always used
to do when he was younger. Pretend he wanted to help so that he could eat the treats early. He held
out longer than I thought, but I think that was more for your benefit than mine.”
Regulus smiled at her because really this woman was quickly becoming his favorite person in the
room. James wouldn’t like to hear that, but Regulus thought that he's slacking off had earned him a
downgrade in favoritism. Luckily for them, Regulus knew just how to motivate James to help. In
the most innocent voice he could muster, he whined “James, would you mind helping me stir this?
It's really stiff and my arms are starting to hurt.”

Effie let out a delighted giggle at the speed at which her son hopped off the counter and rushed
over to take the spoon from Regulus, to which Regulus only winked at her. Her eyes twinkled in
mischievous wonder. Regulus continued his little trick the entire time they spent making the
Desserts. Whenever James started retreating back to the snacks, he would pretend he needed James'
help and the boy would practically run over. Merlin, he loved that idiot.

When they had finally finished after baking for hours, they cleaned up and sat in the sitting room,
while Effie grilled them on Hogwarts. She wanted to know what their grades were like, which had
ended with James bragging about how brilliant his boyfriend was. She wanted to know what
trouble the two had gotten in while they were there, none for Regulus and many times for James.
She wanted to know about Regulus’s friends, to which he told her about Barty and Remy.

They were just discussing how Slughorns yule parties hadn't changed since Effie was in school,
when the floo flared and outstepped James. Well no, not James, an older version of James,
complete with the same dorky glasses. Fleamont Potter looked incredibly alike his son, aside from
the fact that he clearly used his own Sleekeazy potion and James did not.

The man had a smile on his face the minute he stepped out of the fireplace and it didn't fall when it
reached Regulus, who was sitting on the couch, though there was slight confusion in his eyes. He
glanced at the sweatshirt Regulus was wearing, and Regulus was sure he could see that it had
Potter on the back, but then he looked back up at him smiling, “Happy Christmas everyone! I am
guessing that you are Regulus Black?”

Regulus’s eyes widened, worried that the man was going to kick him out after finding out his
name. Meanwhile, James and Effie were snickering at the interaction like school children. He
stood up and held out his hand for Fleamont. He finally found his voice, but he sounded raspy as
he spoke to the man of the house, “Yes sir, I am Regulus. It is lovely to make your acquaintance.”

Fleamont quirked an eyebrow up, his face covered in amusement as he glanced towards his wife
and son. He smiled brightly at Regulus, “You don't need to call me sir, son. I am pleased to meet
you as well. I admit my wife must've forgotten to let me know of your visit.”

Effie giggled and shot Fleamont a wink before standing up, “Oh honey, I thought a surprise would
be better.”
Fleamont let out a booming laugh, that left no question as to who James got his laugh from, “Of
course you did. I'm sure you loved seeing my shock at seeing someone I thought was Sirius, in a
Slytherin sweatshirt of all things. I thought I had stepped into a parallel universe for a second there,
before I remembered he had a brother that looked a lot like him.” He turned to back to Regulus
leaning in as if he was revealing a secret, “There is nothing my wife likes more than a good prank.”

Regulus snorted at that. He had never really imagined what James had gotten from each of his
parents before, but he was incredibly interested now. So far Regulus had gathered that James had
gotten his love of pranks, his eyes, and his charisma from Effie. He had only just met Fleamont but
it was clear that James had gotten his looks, his laugh, and his overly trusting nature from his
father. Regulus thought these were great attributes for them to pass to their son.

James stood up from the couch and embraced his father in a big hug. After he pulled back he
swung his arm around Regulus’s shoulders and properly introduced them, “Dad, this is Reggie as
you’ve already discovered. I invited him to spend Christmas with us, if you don't mind.”

The confident manner in which James spoke his last sentence indicated that he didn't believe that
his father would mind. Of course, James was right, because Fleamont’s grin widened as he reached
out to shake Regulus’s hand again, properly this time, “Of course, the more the merrier. I'm
Fleamont Potter, but please call them Monty. I'm thrilled to have you here.”

Regulus found he liked Monty almost as much as Effie. Monty was very quick to trust, much like
James was, but he was a ridiculously kind man. After spending time in the kitchen preparing
supper with the Potters, he couldn't believe that he had been so nervous to meet the man. James
mentioned later, that he thought Regulus made a great impression by asking Montya bout his
Sleekeazy potion.

When they had finished making a feast, enough for ten rather than three, they sat down to eat.
They had roasted pig, that Monty had apparently been cooking since last night. Along with that,
they had creamy mashed potatoes with thick gravy, red cabbage, mince pies, and Brussel sprouts. It
was all incredible, and even though they all helped, Monty truly seemed to be the chef of the
family. He directed everyone much like a general directing soldiers into battle rather than a family
into cooking dinner.

Regulus moaned slightly as he took a bite of the mince pie, because truly it was a wonder
something could taste this good. Regulus had always thought that Kreacher was an excellent cook,
even better than the elves at Hogwarts, but his favorite house-elf had nothing on Monty Potter.

James’s eyes snapped to his at the sound, and embarrassingly his eyes twinkled with lust. Merlin,
did James not realize his parents were right there? Effie had obviously noticed as she looked
between the two with an indulgent smirk on her face. Monty, however, seemed to be oblivious to
the looks his wife and son were making at Regulus, as he asked, “Good?”

Regulus flushed and smiled up at the man, nodding. Monty smiled brightly before asking, “So
Regulus, OWL’s year for you, isn't it? Do you feel prepared?”

“Yes, pretty prepared. Although my study time is unfortunately limited, still I think I am ready.”

Effie tilted her head in question before asking in her sugary sweet voice, “And why is your study
time-limited, honey?”

Regulus flushed, not wanting to tell the Potter”s, who he really liked, that he had a breakdown a
few weeks into school. James jumped in, sensing his anxiety, “He just has a lot going on, like
quidditch and he's a prefect too.”

Monty beamed at Regulus, clearly finding this topic to be intriguing, “A prefect, really? I was one
too! Effie couldn’t be, because she caused too much trouble but the professors used to love me, in
my day.”

Regulus chuckled, a lot more comfortable now that the subject was away from thoughts of his
parents and all the trouble they had caused him, “You must be very proud of James for making
prefect then.”

James laughed carefreely, he seemed to be more naturally relaxed with his parents, “Oh Reggie,
you know I am only the backup prefect, since Moony no longer wanted the job.”

Regulus hated when James put himself down, he was the last person who should do that. He
wondered if his parents knew that Moony was Remus and more importantly why he had the
nickname. Monty and Effie both frowned at their son, although not wholeheartedly, before Effie
spoke, “James we love Remus and he is such a good boy, but that doesn't mean you didn't deserve
this just as much as he did.”

Monty spoke next, fixing his son with a meaningful look, “There is nothing wrong with being
asked a little later than other prefects, it doesn't make you any less deserving.”
James smiled and Regulus felt that he should join in the little show of support they were all giving
to James, “Besides the only reason they didn't pick you first is because you have a greater number
of detentions than Lupin. The staff are under the impression that he is less of a troublemaker than
you, if only they knew that he's the mastermind behind most of your pranks.”

Effie and Monty laughed, while James grinned at him. Effie smiled at their son fondly, asking, “So
sharing all the secrets of your pranks, are you now?”

James flushed pink, running his hand through his hair, “Only to Reg. He won't let me pull a prank
on Slytherin without warning him, anyways.”

Again the Potter parents laughed deeply, Regulus grinned and added, “We even pulled a prank
together.”

Effie immediately looked interested, her eyes twinkling, “Really? Just the two of you? Tell me all
about it.”

James rolled his eyes at his mother's eagerness, “Okay I'll tell you about it but you have to promise
not to tell Sirius, because he still doesn't know that I had anything to do with it.” He waited for
them to agree before launching into the story of the prank and aftermath, all while Effie looked
extremely proud and Monty looked amused.

After James finished his story, Effie immediately asked him follow-up questions. Monty turned to
Regulus, grinning, “He’s just like his mother, isn't he?”

“I think he's a mix of both of you, but yeah it's clear who he gets his love of pranks from.”

Fleamont beamed at him, clearly enjoying hearing that his son took partially after him, when he
heard Effie say, “Well Jamie, what's the verdict? Is it more fun pulling pranks with the infamous
Marauders or Reggie?”

James looked conflicted as he looked at Regulus, and Regulus couldn't help but roll his eyes at his
idiotic boyfriend. James was clearly under the impression that Regulus was going to be upset if
James said he liked pulling pranks with his friends more than with him. Regulus wasn't that naive
or that antagonistic to cause a fit over something as dumb as that.
Still, it was sort of amusing to watch James struggle to not offend his boyfriend or lie to his
parents. When Regulus looked at Effie she seemed to be enjoying the show as well. James stuttered
a bit, scratching the back of his neck, “Well uh, I um - well I think I prefer pranking with my
friends, but it's really fun with Reggie too. Plus he looks a lot cuter when we prank than they do.”

James ended his sentence with a halfhearted wink at Reggie, causing Effie and him to burst out
laughing at James’ ridiculousness. Once everyone finished dinner, they all migrated to the sitting
room and started the fire, instantly making the house cozy. The room was decorated in festive
Christmas gear, which included a big fir tree in the corner. Before he knew it the Potters were
passing out presents, which made him feel awkward because, of course, he didn't bring anything
for them.

James had sort of sprung this visit of him, otherwise, he would've tried to find something he could
give the Potters for being such gracious hosts. He was surprised when Effie laid a present in his
lap. He immediately tried to refuse it, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer.

James’s presents consisted of new quidditch gloves, a broom servicing kit, a Zonkos joke kit, and a
new brown leather jacket. Regulus really like the jacket when James tried it on.

James noticed the look on his face and smirked, “Ooh Reggie what do you think? Do you think I
look hot?”

Regulus rolled his eyes as James walked closer, strutting in his new jacket, “I think you're full of
yourself, like usual.”

James smiled mischievously, before he leaned forward and quickly pecked Regulus on the lips
before turning back to his parents, “I love the jacket and everything else, thank you so much!”

Regulus meanwhile was left standing stock still unbelieving that James had just kissed him, no
matter how chaste it had been, in front of his parents. Effie smiled broadly at him, while Monty
seemed to be putting two and two together. Regulus was a bit surprised it took him so long,
because quite frankly between the lewd comments from Effie and the unnecessary touching from
James, it was obvious. Though Regulus knew that James could be a bit oblivious, especially when
it came to knowing whether his two best friends are shagging in the bed next to him, this must be
where he got it from.

“Is there more going on here than I thought?” Monty motioned between the two boys as he asked
in a genuine tone.
James slipped his arm behind Regulus’s waist, looking down at Regulus with a smile, “Yeah dad,
Reggie is my boyfriend.”

Monty looked surprised, but not upset before looking at Effie, “Oh well, now I feel stupid. It's
fairly obvious by the way they look at each other, isn't it?”

Effie laughed, nodding her head vigorously, “Yes dear, it really is. If you think the looks are
obvious, then you should've seen the way they were necking in front of the floo when they got
here.”

Regulus burned in embarrassment and James pulled him closer, probably trying to comfort
Regulus. Meanwhile, Effie and Monty continued gossiping about their son's new relationship, until
James suggested Regulus open his gift. When he did he found a set of beautifully leather-bound
novels, that looked to be muggle. He thought they were incredible and couldn't wait to read them,
he thanked them profusely. He also promised to send them a late Christmas gift, but Effie told
Regulus that him spending Christmas with them was enough of a gift.

James spoke next, looking at Regulus a little sheepishly, “Actually technically, Reg did bring
something for you dad, sorry mom we didn't have time to shop for you from him, but I hope you
like the sweater I got you.”

Effie did indeed like the cashmere sweater James had gotten her and Fleamont had adored the copy
of A Compendium of Common Curses and their Counter-Actions by Fillius Capehart James had
gotten him. Regulus didn't know what James was talking about though, he hadn't gotten Fleamont a
gift.

James pulled out another brown paper package, just like the sweatshirt was wrapped in, and handed
it to Monty. Monty smiled at Regulus and unwrapped a first edition of The Tales of Beedle the
Bard by Beedle the Bard.

Monty lit up as he flipped through the pages, “Wow Regulus, this is incredible. Thank you so
much, son.”

Regulus blushed and quickly stammered out, “Oh well I picked it out for you, but it was supposed
to be from James and he paid for it.”
James rolled his eyes at Regulus, groaning, “Reg, you didn't have to tell him that. You are the one
that found the book and thought my dad would like it.”

“But James it was your gift, you didn't have to tell him it was from me.”

James opened his mouth to respond but stopped when he heard his parents trying to stifle their
laughs. Monty finally let some of the laughter out when his son fixed a pointed stare at him, “Sorry
son, I'm just so glad you found someone who can match your energy.”

James and Regulus both blushed as Effie smirked and spoke directly to her husband, “Oh yes
Reggie is the perfect match for Jamie. He knows how to handle him better than even we do.”

Monty looked a little surprised by that, but when he looked at his wife they appeared to be having
a mental conversation. Until Monty turned back, his eyes snagging on Regulus giving him a sweet
smile, his eyes flicked down to the sweatshirt, “Hey Regulus, wasn't that a Slytherin sweatshirt
earlier?”

James looked at him with a huge grin on his face and Regulus knew instantly that James would try
to make him wear that sweatshirt everywhere.

The rest of the night was a blast, or at least it seemed that way to Regulus. The Potters were so
much fun, it was such a weird experience to enjoy a family Christmas. After they finished opening
presents, they played a couple rounds of Wizard's chess and Gobstones. Regulus was really good at
Wizard's chess, but he had to admit that Monty had given him quite the run for his money.

Once they had finally decided to go to sleep, there was the issue of sleeping arrangements. Effie
said that they could not sleep in the same room, but when she offered Sirius’s room to Regulus he
had to refuse. There was no way he was sleeping where his brother slept. With some convincing, it
was decided that Regulus would sleep in James’s room and James would stay in Sirus’s room.

As Regulus lay in James’s bed, he felt mentally exhausted. He had spent the entire day with
wonderful people and he had a great time, but he couldn't help the moments of dread and terror that
had crept through him. He didn't feel good, but he wasn't sick and Madam Pomfrey had said he
was physically fine. Yes, something was wrong, there had to be, otherwise, he could've enjoyed
the day without the overwhelming sense of melancholy.

He was mildly startled by the door creaking open and a warm chest solidly up against his back.
James, of course, didn't listen to his parents. Regulus didn't want James to see Regulus like this,
like he was broken. He had held it in all day, but he knew that the damn was already broken and it
wouldn't be long before the flood of emotions came crashing out.

Regulus whispered, hoping his voice didn't crack, “What are you doing in here?”

James whispered back, his breath on Regulus’s bare shoulder making him shiver, “You need me.”

This time his voice did crack, because how the hell did James know, “I-I don't.”

“Yes, you do.”

“I-I’m f-fine.”

James paused a minute before pulling Regulus closer, “No, Bunny. No, you are not.”

Regulus couldn't stop it, James knew him. He knew that Regulus needed someone and he knew
that Regulus could only fake so many smiles before it became too much. The tears began
streaming down his face, building, and building until he released a light sob.

The sound made James pull him tighter if that was possible, as if James was holding onto him for
dear life. Which was good because the only thing keeping Regulus alive right now, was James,
right here at this moment.

He just didn't understand how the world could be this cruel to him, but so beautiful to others like
James. Why did he have to have the parents that he had? The life that he had? Why couldn't it have
gone to someone else? What was so wrong with him that he couldn't live a happy life?

He sobbed and sobbed as James rubbed his back, “W-why doesn't she love me? Why d-doesn't my
f-father care? Why has e-every moment o-of my life b-been worthless? W-why am I not good
enough James?”

James rubbed his back, all the while whispering in his ear, “I love you. You are perfect. You are
worth everything. She doesn't deserve you. I love you. You make my world brighter. I would be
lost without you. They're the worthless ones. I love you.”

James didn't get it. He never really would, because he didn't know the Regulus that everyone else
knew. He knew the Regulus that loved, loved him, but everyone else knew the cowardly and
callous heir to a cruel family. He didn't realize how worthless Regulus really was, which should
make Regulus grateful but it didn't. It made him feel guilty, that James didn't know his true self.
He was allowing the man to love a farce of a person, someone that wasn’t real. He was trapping
the man into loving him, because he truly was a dreadful person.

James continued to speak soft lies into Regulus’s ear as the Slytherin sobbed about his horrid little
life. Once again living up to the patheticness his mother always accused him of. He sobbed until
there were no tears left, but there was plenty more misery in his soul.

After a long moment of silence, the tears long since stopped, Regulus heard James’s light snore
from behind him. Merlin, he had bored his own boyfriend to sleep. He truly didn't deserve this boy,
he never had. It had just become all the more clear now that he had seen the people from which the
wonderful boy came.

He whispered into the air knowing he had to say it once, even if James didn't understand, because
truly he was selfish and he would pretend everything was fine after tonight, he couldn't lose James.
“Tu es trop bon pour moi. Tu devrais trouver quelqu’un qui ne te ruinera pas, mais je ne peux pas
te laisser partir.”

**************************************************************

Regulus stayed at the Potter’s for the rest of the holiday break and he couldn’t remember ever
enjoying a holiday break as much as he had this one, even the ones when Sirus was still home.
Effie and Monty were the most amazing parents that Regulus had ever seen. They loved James
with everything they had, and they even loved his friends.

Effie and Fleamont had so much love to give, that it didn't matter where you came from or if you
were a Gryffindor, they just plain loved to love. Effie had told Regulus that she loved and adored
him, on his second day there, while it took Monty a whopping four days before he told Regulus
that he loved him. Regulus was just learning what love was like from one person, and now all these
other people were finding room for him in their hearts. He feared that he would disappoint them in
some way, like he disappointed everyone.

He discovered something on this holiday that he had been trying to figure out for years, the reason
Sirius was okay leaving. It was because he had a ginormous safety net made up by each of the
 Potters, ready to catch him when he fell. Regulus had always wondered if it was hard for his
brother when he left. Maybe it was at first, but Regulus assumed that by the first warm hug from
Effie he forgot all about the Black family.

They did all kinds of adventurous things during that week, things Regulus would've never gotten to
do at his own house. They went ice skating on the pond that was near Potter Manor, they built
snowmen, Monty joined them for a snowball fight, they drank coca while Effie read them a
muggle book, and they even attempted to play quidditch one of the warmer days.

For the first time in a long time, Regulus felt himself growing jealous of James. He hadn’t had this
type of feeling since his third year for James, but knowing how James grew up made him a bit
envious. Then again if anyone deserved to grow up filled with love and joy then it was James
Potter.

After long goodbyes from the Potters, complete with hugs from each of them and them making him
promise to write them, they departed back to platform 9 ¾.

They went to the train station separately, not wanting anyone to see them getting on the train
together. They couldn't floo back because it had only been opened for special circumstances. When
Regulus stepped into the compartment, that held Remy and Barty he was immediately greeted with
a pat on the back from Barty and a kiss of the cheek from Remy.

He was very happy to see his friends, but he had to admit that he was longing for a time that he was
at Potter Manor. Potter Manor was truly the happiest place he could think of being.

Chapter End Notes

French Translation (At least what I am trying to say)

"Tu es trop bon pour moi. Tu devrais trouver quelqu’un qui ne te ruinera pas, mais je
ne peux pas te laisser partir."= "You're too good for me. You should find someone
who won't ruin you, but I can't let you go."
 Someone to listen
Chapter Notes

Apologies this took me so long. I don't know why but this chapter was a big struggle
for me to write. It seemed like I hated everything I wrote down, so I hate to rewrite
things more than once. I hope it turned out okay!

Remy

Remy wasn't sure how it had happened. She certainly had never thought it would happen, but here
it was, and surprisingly she didn't mind it all that much. Remy had considered the youngest Black a
friend, since their first meeting in third-year Arithmancy. Regulus Black was someone she felt she
related to on a deeper level. She understood Regulus and he seemed to understand her well enough.
She had felt content when Regulus had finally excepted her friendship because in her mind it was a
long time coming. She knew that it probably wasn't the same for him, as his usual social group
looked down on people like her.

Regulus had never seemed to let her blood status bother him, yet he seemed to always portray the
perfect Slytherin prince facade. Regulus was surrounded by bigotry and cruelty, yet he himself
never seemed to be involved. She knew that being a bystander was just as bad as actually
committing the prejudice, but Regulus had always been an exception to the rule so she never
blamed him.

Bartemius Crouch had never been a bystander. He was always a part of the injustice, that was
pureblood culture. He had never done anything to Remy in particular, but she knew many people
that he had hurt. Barty was not a good guy and he had never pretended to be one. He was a
Slytherin pureblood that had always embodied the beliefs that were expected of him. He hexed
those of lesser value, at least in the eyes of the pure, and he spoke cruelly to those who stuck up for
them. Simply put Barty was a fucking monster, or that's what Remy had always thought.

She still did in a way, though she knew more now. She didn't think that she would ever be able to
forget the proof of his savagery. She was in her third year when she had her first experience with
Barty Crouch.

“Locomotor Mortis!”

Remy turned sharply from her place behind a tapestry on the fourth floor, that had a small crawl
space that was hidden from the corridor. She often found herself sitting here, studying when her
common room became too loud. She hadn’t realized that anyone was wandering the halls this late
at night.

There was the distinct sound of someone falling and a sharp squeal as someone hit the ground. She
couldn't remember what the spell did but she didn't have to wonder for long, as she peeked from
behind the tapestry. There was a small Gryffindor boy laying on the ground his eyes wide and his
legs pressed tightly together. The leg locking hex holding them together. A taller dark-haired boy
was standing over him, sneering but he didn't say anything.

The boy looked terrified, which Remy could understand. She didn't know Barty Crouch personally
but she knew his reputation. After a long moment the boy on the ground stuttered out, “L-look
Crouch, I-I am s-sorry.”

Barty’s eyes darkened, the apology clearly hadn’t met much to him. He leaned down toward the
boy, his eyes on fire, “No you aren't, but you will be mudblood.”

Remy’s eyes widened at the use of such a terrible word. It wasn't a commonly used word any
longer, and people who used it spoke with so much hate. The idea that a boy as young as Crouch
said it that easily was surprising.

Barty turned and began striding away, but he turned back around after a few steps, pointing his
wand at the boy, “Mimble Wimble.”

Remy watched as the Crouch heir walked away with such superiority it made her sick. Mimble
Wimble made it impossible for a person to speak. Once the Slytherin had left she had been able to
unbind the boy's legs on her own but she had to take the boy to Professor Sprout for the tongue-
tying hex.

When Sprout had asked the boy who had done this to him, he lied. Remy didn't say anything either,
because the boy seemed to have his mind made up. When they left her office she asked him why he
had let Crouch get away with it. He had said, “Like I have a death wish? The last thing I want to
do is start a war with Barty Crouch, he's insane.”

Remy never understood why the boy had lied, Barty mightve had a reputation for being crazy but
the teachers still had power over him, he wasn't invincible. Not to mention there were many other
instances with Barty Crouch. Barty was in detention almost as much as the Marauders, which was
a lot. Barty would frequently get caught taunting or hexing a fellow classmate, but Remy knew that
there were plenty of instances where he didn't get caught as well.
Barty Crouch was simply put a total hot head. The boy had a huge temper and it was frankly
terrifying when he was pissed off. It didn't take much to get him there, just a few choice words. He
frequently got in physical fights with other students, which was not particularly common for
wizards. It made no sense for him to behave the way he did. He was a wealthy pureblood heir that
was one of the few old wizarding families that didn't have blood bias. His father was very vocal in
his support for wizards of all backgrounds.

That was until she found out that his father was the root of all his problems. Remy didn't know the
real Barty Crouch Sr. but she knew he was a politician and they could rarely be trusted. Barty had
only told her after they had been hanging out for a while and limitedly they were high. Barty hated
his father, he really despised him. His father had belittled him, his entire life for not being the
picture-perfect son for his political career. According to Barty, his father didn't really practice what
he preached in his politics, he wasn't nearly that sanctimonious.

Barty had specifically asked to be put in Slytherin because he wasn't to get back at his father a bit,
and he also wanted to be nothing like him. His father had been livid at him and had sense pretended
as if he didn't have an heir. Everything Barty had done over the past years was either a product of
his temper or the need to piss off his father.

Barty adored his mother, and absolutely adored her. She was the only reason he ever wanted to go
home during breaks. When Remy had discovered Barty’s incredible fondness, she was admittedly
surprised. Honestly, who would have thought that the big bad Barty crouch was a mama’s boy?

That's why she found Barty to be such an enigma. She had an unignorable amount of proof of his
severe bias, yet here he was laying on her bed looking as comfortable as it was his own. How
could someone who hated those with dirty blood, ergo her, yet be one of her absolute best friends?

She wasn't really wasn't sure how it had happened, but she was sort of glad it did because Barty
had become very important to her. They spent a lot of time together these days, mostly because he
had no other friends besides Regulus. That was part of the reason she had decided to give him a
chance. Regulus trusted him, which was a big vote in his favor because she trusted Regulus and
Regulus trusted very few people. Also, Barty had ended a five-year friendship with Evan Rosier
for Regulus, which meant the guy had good taste.

Rosier had never had as bad of a reputation as Barty, except this year it was clear that he didn't
care who found out about his prejudice. He spoke the word mudblood like it was the word the. He
hexed any muggleborn or half-blood that got in his way. And he talked about muggles like they
were the dirt on the bottom of his shoe. She didn't know much about Barty’s relationship with him
before but she knew that they despised each other now. Barty would often get in physical fights
with the boy, which was a problem because Rosier had a bunch of Slytherin dickheads to back him
up while Barty only had Reg and herself. As much as she loved Regulus, she didn't fancy his
chances in a physical fight, and she was always more of a pacifist herself.

Barty would often come to her dorm after these altercations, and she would heal him, the best she
could with her limited knowledge. Half of the time Regulus didn't seem to realize that there had
been a fight, the boy was so wrapped up in his own world. She understood though, Barty had
hinted that Regulus had a very difficult family life even though the boy had never mentioned it
himself. Regulus often was occupied with something or someone, so Barty would often hang out
with just her or her friends. Which was a very weird dynamic. Remy had plenty of friends but
usually, they were the type to stay out of fights and arguments, so it was really weird for the
school's biggest instigator to hang out with them. Still, by now they seemed to have gotten used to
him and he even stopped making backhanded comments to their face.

Regulus was around less and less as of late, which she was disappointed in because she really loved
that kid. It was funny, she had considered Regulus a friend for years but she was pretty sure he had
never felt the same until they hang out down by the greenhouses that day. When Regulus had told
her that no one loved him and she had promised to love him if he let her. She knew that Regulus
probably didn't think of that moment often, as he had been high off his ass, but she did.

Regulus Black was the type to stay out of the spotlight, really sweet when no one was looking, and
way too smart for his own good. He liked to pretend he didn't have morals, but he had better
morals than most. He tried to fit in with the Slytherin crowd by appearing emotionless and cold,
but he often let his true emotions slip through the cracks.

Like before the holiday break when his older brother Sirius and Remus Lupin made their
relationship public in front of the entire school. His face shone with pride for his brothers' bravery
for only a brief minute before indifference took over. She had even seen the look of approval he
had shot James Potter after he threatened that prick Mulciber.

Sirius was always a touchy topic for Regulus. Remy tried not to bring him up too often, but she
also thought it wasn't healthy for him to hold it all in. Remy had never minded Sirius Black. She
often saw him down at the greenhouses along with Remus and occasionally Peter Pettigrew. They
weren't necessarily friends, though she was better acquainted with Remus, she had always thought
of him as a decent guy though he liked pranks a bit too much. Regulus was his complete opposite
and she could admit she much preferred him, but she still didn't understand the barrier between the
two boys.

Barty claimed it was because Sirius was a fucking prick and Regulus finally got sick of dealing
with him, but she knew that wasn't true. She thought it could be because Sirius had left the family,
but she couldn't be certain until Regulus opened up with her. She knew that she might be waiting a
long time for that moment, but she was willing to wait.
Remy looked down at the sight of her and once again wondered how the hell this had become her
reality. Barty Crouch was sprawled out on her bed, looking extremely comfortable. Regulus Black
was leaning against her desk while she sat on the tabletop next to him. They were talking about
their holidays, well it was more Barty and her talking about the holidays while Regulus avoided
the topic of his own.

Remy had just finished telling them about how her younger sibling had decided that this Christmas
was the one that they'd decided to be complete opposites. Remy had twin siblings that were eight,
Peonies and Everard. They had always acted pretty similar but apparently, Everard was becoming
embarrassed to be so similar to his sister. SO he had developed a fascination for muggle cars, and
preceded to make it his entire personality. Peonies decided that she wanted to be an author and
proceeded to give everyone personalized stories for Christmas. Merlin, she loved those little brats.

Barty had told them about the fancy dinner parties that he had been forced to attend. COmpleter
with his father berating him after for one reason or another. Barty’s mother had given him a
muggle compass for Christmas, WHich had apparently been her grandfather. Barty told them how
he didn't need a compass as there were spells for navigation, but it had meant a lot to his mother for
him to have it.

“So Barty how was the Nutcracker this year? Still Painfully muggle?” Regulus smirked after the
question and Remy tried to picture Barty sitting through the painfully long play that was the
Nutcracker.

Remy tilted her head in question at Barty, because when he was telling her about his break he
hadn’t told her about a play. Barty caught her eyes and rolled his own as if he was telling her it
wasn't worth discussing, “It's always painfully muggle Regs. I wish ma didn't make me go every
year.”

Regulus snorted before he adopted a teasing tone, glancing at Remy in explanation, “Barty here
must've forgotten to tell you that he is a huge mama’s boy. His mom has been dragging him to the
same play every Christmas since he was five and he hates it every year, but he doesn't want to tell
his mom that.”

Remy smiled at that, because honestly the thought of the Barty Crouch, supposedly one of the
most unhinged students at Hogwarts, was a total mama's boy was adorable. Barty flushed red,
before fixing a glare on Reg, “Watch your back, Black.”

Regulus’ eyes lit up in mischief, “Why cause you to want a better view?”
Remy snorted loudly while Barty sprung up and grabbed Regulus in a headlock. The two boys
wrestled around for a moment before Remy called out, “Boys behave yourselves honestly. One
would have expected two noble purebloods such as yourselves to have better around a lady.”

Barty snorted, smirking at Remy, “A lady? Right a lady who throws a mean punch herself.”

Remy rolled her eyes, but she had a smile on her lips, “Oh I'm sorry not all of us were born into the
upper echelon of society with your impeccable manners.”

Barty snorted at her, “Upper echelon? Bullshit.”

Remy chuckled at these two idiots, honestly how could they not know how privileged they were?
She pointed to Regulus who had settled himself on her bed, taking Brty’s previous spot, “One of
you comes from a family that is in the running for the wealthiest families in wizarding Britain.”
She motioned to Barty next, “ANd one of you comes from a political powerhouse of a family.”

Regulus shrugged as if had never really doubted her words, though his eyes darkened and he was
clearly sucked into his own thoughts. Barty wrinkled his nose in disgust, groaning, “Ugh don't talk
about my father, this is a safe space.”

“I wasn't talking about your dad, obviously I was talking about your mom.”

Barty’s head whipped toward her in shock, “What? My mother is a society lady, what are you
talking about?”

Remy started laughing because honestly what a joke. The idea that Evelyn Crouch was simply a
society lady? Her laughter slowed when she realized that Barty looked confused. Had he not been
joking? Did he really not know what his mother did in her free time?

“You're joking, right? You know that your mother had proposed some of the most influential and
controversial bills in magical creature history, right?”

Barty’s face darkened, not happy that someone knew something about his mother that he didn't,
“What the bloody hell are you talking about?”
Now she feels bad, Merlin she never would've guessed that she wouldn't tell her son of her political
proclivities. Or that someone wouldn't tell him. All this time they had spent together as of late and
she never wanted to mention what a big fan she was of his mother's policies because she assumed
he heard it all the time. She glanced at Regulus for help, because hopefully, he knew what she was
talking about, but he was looking out the window with a distant look in his eye. Merlin, she
worried about him zoning off so often lately.

She took a deep breath and cleared her throat, “Well your mother has presented many proposals to
the Wizingamot to overturn certain magical creature restrictions. Such as bonding house elves to
one specific family an-”

Regulus interrupted her, she must've caught his attention by mentioning house-elves. She knew the
boy had always adored his own house-elf, “Really? When?”

She turned to Regulus smiling at his soft naivety as if wizards would ever change their opinions on
what they consider to be lesser creatures, “She's been submitting them for years and a few of the
policies have been taken to Wizengamot vote and everything.”

“My father has no respect for house elves, I'm surprised he allowed this. Why wouldn't she tell
me?” Barty spoke softly looking at his hands, confused.

Remy sighed and she instantly regretted bringing it up, “She also has made proposals regarding
goblin rights, dragon training, and nome integration. I don't think she needs to ask your father for
permission to submit proposals. Your mother is quite impressive.”

“Do you think my father knows?”

Remy rolled her eyes because honestly, boys could be so stupid sometimes, “Of course, he knows.
Your mother came from the house of Sigman which historically is a very politically motivated
house and just because she married another political animal does not mean she must abandon those
inclinations herself does it?”

Barty shook his head but still didn't seem sure that this wasn't all a joke, “Why would she let me
continue to think she is a society lady?”

Regulus jumped in this time and Remy had forgotten that he was still there for a minute, “Maybe
because she is a society lady.” Barty and Remy both looked at Regulus in confusion because she
had just explained how his mother wasn't a society lady, “No, seriously just because a woman
comes from a wealthy family and doesn't specifically have a career, that doesn't mean she does
nothing with her free time. Your mother may strictly be a housewife but that doesn't mean she
doesn't have passions and goals.”

Remy was stunned because Regulus was completely right and he articulated it perfectly. Women
didn't have to have a career to be successful or have a passion. She swore every moment she spent
with Regulus made her more aware of the world around her. He was so in tune sometimes.

Barty nodded as if Regulus had just made everything make sense, and he sort of did. He walked
over and leaned his hand on the desk next to Remy, looking at her quizzically, “Why is it that you
know so much about my mom?”

Remy flushed, which was not something she was in the habit of doing. She was not an easy person
to embarrass because usually, she didn't give a fuck what anyone thought. However, her two
closest friends discovering her massive girl crush on Evelyn Crouch was mortifying. She was just a
very impressive woman and Remy strived to be like her someday.

She attempted to calm her nerves and spoke out in false nonchalance, “I've done my research. She's
an impressive woman.”

Barty smirked at her red cheeks, clearly enjoying her embarrassment, “Wow if I had known you
were such a big fan I would've arranged a meeting for you over break.”

Remy was through playing it cool for the moment, “Wait Really? You could've done that?”

He laughed a bit but then hopped on the desk next to her, throwing an arm around her shoulder,
“I'll send her a letter and verify all this shit. Maybe I can line up a time for you to meet her this
summer.”

Remy’s eyes bulged and she could barely tamp down her excitement, “Really? You don't have to
do that.

Barty’s smirk was back, “Let's call it a late Christmas present.”

Remy couldn't help but grin at the idea of meeting her inspiration. Her eyes caught Regulus and he
was smiling at her, “So Reg, speaking of gifts. What did you think of mine?”

Regulus’s face burned and Barty laughed heartedly, so she knew he had already shown him her
gift, “Honestly Rem if it was your goal to embarrass me you could've stopped at the book, you
really didn't have to include the bag of pot.”

Barty laughed louder again and Remy smirked. She had gotten Reg a book on tantric sex and the
corresponding pleasure centers for both males and females because she wasn't sure of his
preference yet. She knew that it was a little out there for Regulus, but honestly, she figured that as
much time as he spent meeting this mysterious person, he must be having sex. She also figured
Regulus had only gotten his information about sex from Crouch, since his parents were described
as prudish, and merlin only knows what Barty told him.

“Hey don't knock the book till you read it, it might help you during your mysterious rendezvous.”
Regulus's face burned at the implication, “And I got you the weed because I figured if anyone
could use some relaxation it would be you.”

Barty snickered and murmured something that sounded like an understatement. Regulus nodded
but still looked embarrassed, it was possible he didn't realize that his friends knew about his
mystery lover. Though she thought that was a bit naive of him considering he would be gone for
hours and come back looking fussed and satisfied.

Barty nonchalantly “So Reg did you happen to bring your gift with you?”

**************************************************************************

Regulus

Regulus was feeling very glad that he had agreed to this. He had been wary when Barty had first
brought it up but now he couldn't for the life of him remember why. This was the best feeling in
the world. He couldn't remember why in the world he had decided not to do it again because now
that he had he didn't ever want to stop. This helped him forget everything for a moment and he
loved it.

He loved the floaty feeling that his body took. He could recognize that it was different than the last
time, not as surreal, though that might be because he wasn't staring at the sky this time. Instead, he
was looking around the cheerful dorm of his best friend Remy and was listening to his best friend
hit on her.

“I'm just saying no one pulls off a messy bun like you do babe.” Barty leans in closer to Remy
winking at her flirtatiously. Regulus thinks it looks more like he's got a twitch than anything. Remy
rolls her eyes looking completely unbothered by the sudden flirtation their friend has taken towards
her.

She didn't answer Barty but looked at Regulus with amusement in her eyes, “He always does this
when we smoke. Just hits on anyone and everyone I swear, but it passes pretty quick.”

Regulus nodded exaggeratedly as if this was a very important piece of information that he couldn't
forget. He looked at his friend Barty curiously. Barty was a good-looking guy. He wasn't exactly
sure why that information was relevant to his hindered brain, but it felt like the type of thing he
should categorize for later.

Barty looked defeated when Remy didn't dignify his coquetry with a response, Regulus figured that
she had gotten sick of responding after the first six pick-up lines he tried on her. Barty glanced at
Regulus and his foggy eyes piqued with interest as he scooted closer, slinging an arm around
Regulus’s shoulder. He leaned his head on his shoulder looking adoringly into Regulus’s eyes,
“Hey Regs, did anyone ever tell you that you have the prettiest eyes.”

Regulus could hear Remy burst into a fit of laughter, enjoying something about this interaction.
Regulus on the other hand was wishing Barty had hazel eyes and black hair and stupid glasses. It
would also be great if his name was James. Oh, James. He sighed adoringly at the thought of his
man. He blurted out without much thought because really this stuff made him have no filter, “Yes.”

Barty pulls back abruptly looking scandalized, “Uh excuuuuse me who has been complimenting
you like that?”

Regulus was confused. Why the hell was Barty mad that someone else had told him that his eyes
were pretty. It's not as if they were dating, Merlin imagines dating Barty. Yuck, he was so not his
type. Besides Regulus already had a boyfriend and he could kick his good friend's arse. Well
probably, at least physically he could but in a duel, he wasn't sure. He had never actually seen
James duel, though he had heard he was pretty good at hanging people upside down by their legs.
Well, at least he was good at doing that to Snape.

Regulus couldn't help the giggle that escaped his throat as he thought of Snape's greasy black hair
falling in his face and his arms flailing about trying to figure out how to get down. It's not that he
liked the idea of his boyfriend being a bully, though he found that for the most part, he didn't care
all that much, Snape deserved whatever was coming to him. The guy was a total prat who
frequently tried to belittle Regulus’s intelligence, which always failed because well Regulus
usually knew more than the half-blood. Not that his blood type really mattered.

Regulus was only thrown out of the thoughts of Snape dangling by Remy letting out a loud
distracting laugh. He glanced at his friend's faces one holding great amusement for him and the
other looking at him as if he was an alien. Well if he was an alien he would be from a cool planet
with like telepathy or something, he read about a place like that in a muggle book.

“He was the same way last time we did this. All caught up in his thoughts, giggling throughout the
entire time. It's adorable.”

Barty smirked, still looking a little weirded out by the sudden fit of laughter, “No he's adorable but
that is just plain bizarre.”

“He is a cutie, isn't he?”

Barty nodded and Regulus suddenly felt out of the loop. Which made no sense because they had
been talking in front of him the whole time. Who the hell did they think was so cute? Was it James
Potter? Because while he was cute, he was also Regulus’s.

“Hey who are you talking about?” He demanded, putting on his sternest face, knowing that they
would be intimidated by it.

They looked away from each other, looking at him and then they burst out laughing. Huh? He
must not have been stern enough or they were just very hard to intimidate.

“Merlin! Reg you were sitting right here how the hell do you not know who we are talking about?
You are so gone.”

Regulus pouted at that non-answer, Remy took pity on him and leaned over whispering as if it was
a big secret, “We were talking about you, honey.”

He gasped, probably a little too loudly. What the hell did they mean they were talking about him?
He was not adorable or cute, he was handsome and manly. He crossed his arms over his chest and
looked at them indignantly, “I am not adorable. I am a man, I'm handsome or nothing.”

His two traitor friends laughed once more and Regulus felt underlie betrayed. First James insists
that he is cute as a bunny and now, they were starting to make him doubt his masculinity.

Regulus was distracted from his friend's betrayal by Barty picking up one of the joints he had
rolled earlier. Regulus had started to notice his floatiness floating away and he desperately wanted
to escape the reality that was his current mental situation, “I'll forgive you both for that slight if
you give me a couple more hits off that one.”

Remy looked unsure but when she looked to check with Barty he nodded. Regulus really didn't
know why they had to check with each other, for fuck sake he wasn't a child or at least no younger
than them, besides it was his Christmas gift.

Barty lit the cigarette and took a deep drag before he was suddenly leaning towards Regulus.
Before he could comprehend what was happening Barty’s lips were on Regulus’s and his hand was
cupping his cheek. Regulus gasped, opening his mouth as Barty blew all the smoke he had just
inhaled into his mouth. He pulled back, grinning, “Breathe it in Regs.”

Regulus inhaled, relishing in the feeling of smoke filling his lungs. He blinked up at Barty’s
grinning face and could hear Remy giggling in the background, “What was that?”

Barty smiled wolfishly, and Regulus found that flirty Barty was a bit unbearable, “That was
shotgunning.”

“Oh,” Regulus thought about it for a second, and then, “I liked it.”

Barty winked at him, “I bet you did, baby.”

Remy giggled even harder at Regulus' expression, because honestly why the hell had Barty just
called him baby? Did Barty think that he was childish? Is that why he didn't think that Regulus
breathe in the smoke on his own? He pouted at Barty indignantly, “I am not a baby. I'm older than
you by two months.”

Barty and Remy looked at each other and started laughing. Regulus didn't understand what was so
funny, he was older. He wished he would have never introduced the two of them if they were going
to team upon him.”

Remy threw her arm around his shoulder and Regulus was taken aback by her sudden appearance.
He could've sworn a second ago that she was across from him. Her voice was chock full of
amusement as she said, “He's flirting with you Reg. He didn't mean you were a baby, it was just a
pet name.”

“Oh.” He wasn't a pet either and if someone was trying to flirt with you why would they call you
the name of a pet. He had never actually met a pet with the name Baby before, but he supposed it
wreaked of muggles bad taste. If he was a pet then he would be called something cool like….
Regulus. How badass would it be to name your pet after a star? Ooh, maybe he would be a lion
since his name would be out of the lion constellation. That would be pretty cool, though he would
say his personality didn't fit a lion either. He turned to glare at Barty, “I'm not your pet either.”

Then those traitorous friends of his were laughing again and Barty made some crack about how he
could love to have him sleep at his feet every night either way. Merlin his friend was acting so
weird today. First, he kisses Regulus, then he called him a baby, and then he’d like him to
essentially be his dog.

Remy moved and squeezed him closer slightly before kissing him on the side of his cheek, “I love
you Regulus.”

Eww, what's with all the emotional intimacy in this room. Regulus did not sign up for that when
Barty suggested they all get high. What with all his friends kissing him today?

“Oh shit.”

Remy and Barty peered at him curiously, as that was not the typical response when one tells
someone that they love them. Regulus groaned having just realized something. Barty had kissed
him on the mouth, though it was more of a transfer than a kiss, did that mean he cheated. Or does
the not count because Regulus had no idea it was going to happen and there wasn't even tongue?
Should he let James know? Should he let James know that Remy kissed him on the cheek? That
Barty had told him he wanted him to be his pet?

Regulus wasn't sure about any of this, but luckily he knew just who to ask. He looked at Remy,
“What counts as cheating?”
Remy’s eyes widen and Barty makes an odd sound, but Regulus is looking at him till he finds out
whether Barty made him cheat on his boyfriend or not. She cleared her throat, “Um well like when
you are in a relationship with someone and you hook up with someone else.”

Regulus frowned, that was not good. He turned to Barty because he seemed to be the expert on
shotgunning, “Is shotgunning with someone else cheating?”

Barty’s mouth dropped open in a comically wide way and he looked a lot more sober than he had a
minute ago, “Are you dating someone Regs? I wouldn't have done it if I knew.”

That was not an answer, why can't they just give him a straight answer. He urged them on, looking
between them both, “But you didn't answer, is it? Or no?”

Remy cleared her throat seeming to be a little uncomfortable, “No Reg I would say it's not. You
didn't know what it was and it wasn't even a kiss.”

Regulus was instantly filled with relief. He figured he'd still tell Jamie about it, mostly because he
would like to try it with him. There was just the barrier of James not smoking to get through, but he
was sure they could make it work. It was an exhilarating feeling and he would love to see what it
was like to have James push smoke into his mouth. James had such a nice mouth and he really
knew how to use it, Regulus could attest to that. There was this one time that Jam–

His thoughts of James’s mouth were interrupted by Barty speaking, “Regulus you didn't answer,
are you dating someone.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Obviously.”

Remy released a spurt of laughter as Barty looked indignant, “What the hell! Why did you tell us
that? Is that where you are always sneaking off to? I just figured you were sneaking around
studying when you weren't supposed to.”

Remy smacked Barty’s arm hard and he shot a bewildered expression at her, “You thought he was
breaking his study regulations and you just let him? Therefore his own safety, dumbass.”

“I'm not an idiot he was acting fine, not tired or stressed, so I figured there was no problem. Of
course, that was before I knew he was off snogging with some chick that time.”
Remy was about to respond something but was taken off guard by Regulus’s burst of laughter. He
began laughing uncontrollably and he literally couldn't stop. Every time he got close to settling
down he imagined James Potter in the girls' Hogwarts uniform. He would look good in a skirt.

“He– He” Regulus had to pause his speech to laugh some more before he could finally get it out,
“He is no–not a chick. Th-though he who-would look good in a skirt.”

They looked at him wide-eyed as he laughed some more and vowed to tell James about his image
of him in a skirt. Hell, maybe he could convince him to wear one for him.

Remy was suddenly hugging him and Barty was patting his shoulder and that calmed his
amusement down real quick. What was with all the affection today, seriously? Remy whispered
something to him, he didn't quite hear, but she said it in a soft sweet voice that he liked.

They stayed like that for a few minutes until Barty spoke, “What's his name then?”

“James.”

Barty tilted his head as if he was running through the possibilities of who it could be. Regulus
didn't think it would be that hard, even if there were plenty of people named James in the school,
there was only one that mattered.

Remy spoke out of nowhere, pulling back onto her haunches, her eyes knowing, “James Potter, isn't
it?”

Regulus grinned and Barty made an indignant sound, “James Potter are you fucking kidding me?
That prat?”

They spent the rest of their high talking about James and Regulus’s relationship. Regulus found
that he quite liked talking about James and he was glad he finally had people to share him with.

**************************************************************************************

Regulus
Regulus sat on his bed staring at the small bottle in front of him, it was filled with a milky grey
liquid that Regulus was going to have to become very comfortable with if he wanted to continue
living a semi-normal life. For the rest of his life, he would have to choke down this disgusting
potion to make sure his nerves didn't start shutting down on him. The worst part was knowing who
had done this to him. He told himself to move on and get over it, after all, he had made his choice
to leave, but it was harder than he originally thought.

Madam Pomfrey had mentioned the possibility of mental destabilization as an effect of the
prolonged Cruciatus curse. She had demanded to see him immediately after he returned from the
Potter's, furious that he had left for the week after he had just been injured. Now he had a weekly
scheduled appointment with her to check on his nerves and to perform a litmus test of his higher
brain function.

He was fine, at least he thought that he was fine. It was strange, one moment he could be laughing
happily with James or his friends, and the next he would feel as if he was falling into a deep hole
that he couldn't escape. It wasn't as if he had never been depressed, because Merlin knows that
wasn't true, but it had never come so quick before.

James had noticed this change, Regulus was sure of that, but he was decent enough not to push
Regulus to discuss it. Really Regulus wouldn't even know how to discuss it, because he truly didn't
know why he'd get these random rushes of emotions. James would always find a way to comfort
him, in a way that wasn't pushy. James was his rock, but he wasn't always around his rock.

His friends had no idea what had taken place on Christmas Eve, and he didn't want to tell them. He
didn't want to feel their pity. Barty might not have the best father but his father would never
physically harm him and Remy’s parents smothered their kids in affection. They couldn't relate to
what he was going through, no one could. Even if he was still friends with Evan, he wouldn't
understand, because while Evan's parents were more like the Black family than his other friend's
families, Regulus knew that they never physically harmed their child.

Evan was a subject that Regulus didn't like to think about. Evan and he had been friends for years,
but Regulus had always known that it was going to end eventually. Evan was too unstable and
power-obsessed for Regulus to carry into adulthood as a friend. He had always thought their
friendship would at least last until they left school, but Evan had changed and Regulus didn't like
the person he had become. Evan hung out with the wrong crowd and he focused on the wrong
things, making them his ultimate goals.

Regulus didn't want to think of the friend that he had lost, instead, he thought of the friend that he
had gained. Remy was one of his absolute favorite people and Regulus thought that she had been
rubbing off on Barty for the better. Barty was hardly seen hexing anyone anymore and if he did, it
wasn't for blood status or which house they were in, it was because they bumped into him and he
had anger issues.
Regulus hadnt meant to tell them about James, he really hadn't, but the weed had gotten to him, and
well it all came out. Barty's reaction was understandable, not to mention Remy told him that Barty
tended to get neurotic when he smoked. Remy had been as kind as he could've hoped and he knew
Barty would come around to liking James when he spent more time with him.

And wasn't that a crazy thought? The fact that Barty would meet James, that it didn't matter that
his friends had found out because eventually, everyone would find out. He wasn't quite ready to
scream it from the rooftops and he was already advised that he should wait until the charges
against his parents were settled before doing anything drastic. This essentially means that he should
act as if everything is normal for the time being, but still eventually James and he would be
together for real. It was a bloody scary thought, but one that made his heart pound faster.

His friends knowing was okay, as he had warned them not to tell anyone quite yet and he trusted
them. James had also requested that they tell his friends, but Regulus asked for more time. He still
wasn't quite ready to tell his brother. Not that this brother could judge him for being gay or
anything, that would be hypocritical, but Sirius still wasn't his favorite person and at the moment
he only wanted his favorite people to know.

He was still staring intently at the potion in his hands when he was startled into almost dropping
the bottle, which could have been disastrous as it took days for Madam Pomfrey to brew, “What
are you doing drugs now that you're hanging out with the resident druggie?”

“Fuck!” Regulus scrambled to catch the bottle before he dropped it completely, thankfully he did.

Evan had come into the room and was standing near his bed leaning on his desk, “Oh relax, I'm
sure it's nothing that Crest cant get you more of. I hear she had Crouch running after her like some
addicted puppy dog. I guess that's how mudbloods have to catch their boyfriends these days.”

Regulus stood up slamming the potion on his bedside table, thank god it didn't break, “That's
enough. Don't fucking talk about her like that. She doesn't do those types of potions and neither
does Barty. So shut your god damn mouth, Rosier.”

Evan curled his lip up in a snarl, his voice hard, “Right, I'm sure they don't. Just how you're not
becoming a fucking blood traitor. At least mommy knows now and can talk some sense into you.”

Regulus felt as if he was falling, falling hundreds of meters to his death. He struggled to get his
breathing under control, panic rising up in him. How? How had Rosier known? Why does he seem
glad that his mother knew? Does he not know what she would do to him? What she had done to
him? Rosier– No Evan had known Regulus for years, had been his closest friend through much of
that time. How could he believe that Walpurga would simply talk sense into him after such a
betrayal?

Evan might have never mentioned the scars on Regulus’s body, but they both knew what they were
from. He had been seeing them for years, whenever Regulus changed. Had he really fallen so far as
to be happy with Regulus’s punishment, to justify it? Did Evan hate him that much? Did he want to
see Regulus’ tortured for his connection to a muggleborn?

Why? Why? Why?

When he finally managed to speak, his voice came in a strained whisper, “What?”

Evan scoffed, rolling his eyes, annoyed, “Come on Black, don't be so naive. Did you really think
that I wouldn't tell my parents of your indiscretion?”

The air was sucked completely out of his lungs. His mother had known the entire Christmas dinner
that he had befriended a half-blood. She had only dug through his mind to verify the truth of the
information she had already heard from the Rosier's. She had dug through his memories with a
purpose, not bothering with his decoy memories until she found the ones she desired. The ones that
verified her son's betrayal. All the traps she had set for him throughout dinner were only the
beginning of her sick game. Walpurga Black was more insane than he thought.

And Rosier, Evan Rosier had gifted her the information to destroy her son. He had known that his
mother would immediately seek out Walpurga to inform her of her son's imprudence. Walpurga
Black had avoided her son until the very night one year prior that she had punished her eldest son
for similar crimes. Walpurga was apparently one for ironies and poetic justice. She had toyed with
him until her rage had found its way to the surface. No matter what Regulus said it was too late to
matter, but she wanted to give him the hope that if he just said the right response he'd be safe.

Evan Rosier might not have known what the Black matriarch was going to do to her son, but he
knew what she was capable of. Yet he had done it anyway, he had made sure Regulus was
punished for abandoning him.

Regulus was speechless, his entire world felt like it was falling apart, though it was already broken
beyond repair. He knew that Evan was no longer the boy he had known as a kid, but he had never
suspected him to do something like this. Who was this person in front of him?
Rosier apparently suffered no such affliction as his arrogance-filled voice teased, “Oh don't look at
me like that, just because mommy yelled at you for your filthy relationship with the mudblood.”

Regulus felt sick, he thought that he might actually throw up. His hands quivered as he spoke,
trying to sound calm but his words shook with rage, “You have no idea what you did to me.”

Rosier laughed loudly, it sounded cold and cruel, it made Regulus’s stomach twist, “Don't be so
fucking dramatic Regs. You are clearly fine, so why don't you just get over yourself and dump the
bitch already. I know your mother told you to, yet you were with her yesterday.”

Regulus crossed the room in two steps, his arm pressing against Rosier's throat, and had him
against the wall before the boy could blink. He pushed hard, wanting Rosier to feel some of the
panic and pain he had felt when his mother had choked him as punishment. His old friend throws
out his fists in an attempt to dislodge Regulus by any means necessary, but Regulus had been hit
too many times in his life for that to slow him down. Rosier soon realized that the action was futile
so he started grabbing Regulus’s arm trying to pry it off his throat. Regulus might not be a large
boy but he was strong enough to hold his arm steady.

He looked at Rosier with deadly intent, letting the treachery he felt fall to the surface as he spoke,
“You're proud of that little game you played, aren't you?” He loosened his hold so as to not let the
boy pass out before he was done speaking to him, “You think that what you did was clever and
maybe even a little heroic, don't you? What a hero Evan Rosier is, he saved the Black heir from
ruining himself by telling on him to his mommy.”

Evan gasped for breath as soon as he loosened his hold, but he was still pinned to the wall by
Regulus. He stared at him with wide eyes, surprised by Regulus' actions. Whether he didn't think
the other Slytherin had it in him to threaten the boy or he just believed that Regulus would thank
him for his interference, it didn't matter.

Regulus spoke again in his deadly calm voice, that he had learned from his mother, “Do you really
believe that my mother yelled at me for befriending a half-blood?” He laughed coldly while
Rosiers face contorted in confusion, “You're confused. You had this perfect plan about how you'd
let it slip to your mother about what I was doing and once she told my mother, I would straighten
out and befriend you again. Isn't that right?”

Rosier did not respond, just looked down at his feet until Regulus pushed on his throat once more.
With his oxygen supply cut off his eyes flipped back up to Regulus’ in panic. Regulus gritted out,
“Answer me.”
Rosier couldn't speak but he did nod his affirmation and Regulus let the boy breathe again, “Yes, it
was quite a plan, but I think you forgot one key thing, my mother's rage.” Rosier looked baffled
once more, “My mother has never simply yelled at me for anything in my entire life. Punishment is
always necessary to drive home the point according to Walpurga.”

Regulus stepped back letting Rosier go completely. Partly because he didn't think the boy would
attack him now that he was reminded of the abuse that Regulus had suffered all his life and partly
because his rage was simmering and soon all that would be left was depression and he didn't want
the boy to have to pleasure of seeing him breakdown.

Once he had given himself a suitable amount of distance between the other boy, he spoke again,
“You knew that she wasn't just going to yell at me. You knew what she would do to me if she
found out. You knew what she had done to me, yet you used her in your plans to get back at me.”

Rosier looked surprisingly contrite as he stuttered out, “I– I didn't know Regulus. I–”

“Bullshit, you knew. You knew what happened when I so much as broke a vase in that house.
What did you think was going to happen when she found out I directly disobeyed her biggest rules.
Fuck, you have no idea how much you've fucked up my life.”

Regulus stormed over to his bedside table and grabbed his potion before turning on his heel. Rosier
began speaking in a penitent manner, “Regulus, I’m so–”

Regulus interrupted him by thrusting the potion toward him so he could clearly see the swirly gray
in front of him, “Do you see this? The potion you accused me of abusing in order to, what did you
say “get high with my druggie girlfriend”? This is an acclimating potion I have to take every week
for the rest of my life so the nerve endings my mother damaged with her little “punishment” don't
deteriorate to the point where I lose function of my limbs. Not to mention the phycological damage
I might have from having the Cruciatus curse on me for a long period of time. But yes, you are of
course right, I am completely fine.”

Rosier went deathly pale. He had clearly never thought his plan through enough to foresee what
would happen to Regulus. He was horrified and Regulus knew why. His mother and father had
never physically harmed him, but he had always known that the Black family worked in a different
way. He never imagined a mother would do something like this to her own son because his mother
wouldn't. It was the same look James got in the hospital wing, fundamental disbelief from growing
up in an environment where this sort of action was unthinkable. He hated the pitying look people
gave him when they discovered that while the Black family was wealthy and prestigious, they
were demented.
He couldn't help himself from making sure Rosier knew exactly what his plan had cost him. He
wanted the boy to know that he was part of the reason Regulus would have to choke down this
sickly potion for the rest of his life. It was probably cruel to put that on the boy, but Regulus wasn't
exactly in a merciful mood.

Rosier didn't say anything as Regulus uncapped the potion and drank it down in front of him. His
face grimacing at the taste, “You knew the way she was and you did this to me. You wanted us to
regain our friendship after all this? That is never going to happen, Rosier. You are dead to me.”

Regulus set the bottle down on the bedside table once more and walked into the bathroom, locking
the door behind him. Technically it was a communal bathroom but Regulus only had two
roommates and he doubted Rosier was going to follow him in there. Regulus stripped and got in
the shower, letting the warmth rain upon him.

It was only once he was in a secured place with the sound of the shower around him that he let
himself break. He sobbed and sobbed till the tears tried up and he was just shaking on the floor of
the shower, the water's long since turned cold.

It was moments like this that made it difficult to remember the good things he had in his life. He
knew that he had to try to remember those things when life felt like pure pain. Lately, he seemed to
be reciting them in a mantra nearly every day. Every day he had to remind himself of the good
people, even though he was surrounded by the bad.

James

Remy

Barty

Kreature

Over and over he would repeat those four names until things started to feel okay. Sometimes it took
longer than others, like right now. He couldn't get himself out of his own head no matter how
many times he thought of Remy and her laugh, Barty's sarcastic comments, Kreatures curious
questions, and James's smile.

It hurt. Everything hurt. He just wanted it to stop hurting. He wanted to feel okay. He wanted to
move on and forget the pain, but the pain always dragged him back.
Buzz.

Regulus looked down at the red leather band that he never took off. James was thinking about him.

He stood up and got ready for dinner.

*****************************************************************************************

Dear Regulus,

You wouldn't believe how happy I was to hear from you. I miss you very much, dear cousin. I also
am somewhat opposed to how our family handled my situation, though I have no regrets. Please do
not take that as a confirmation that I wanted to leave you or Sirius, because it is certainly not.
Actually, as much as I am glad to be rid of certain members of our family, you two would never be
included in that. I still remember teaching you how to play the piano when you were all but five,
that was a long time ago. I know you didn't specifically ask, but I’m going to tell you anyway. I am
doing incredibly well as is my family. Ted is working at the ministry as an Auror and I'm not sure if
you were aware of this but we have a child. Our daughter's name is Nymphadora Tonks and she is
five years old. She is so beautiful. She actually reminds me of you, quite a lot, when you were
younger. She is a metamorphagus, which can be pretty trying for her father and me, but also quite
amazing. Anyways I am sure this is all boring you to tears, so I will get back to the original
purpose of the letter. I understand your concerns over Narcissa's chosen partner, however, I think
you are forgetting how little choice we are met to get in a life mate. Take your parents, for
example, as terrible as they are, do you really think they wanted to marry their cousin? I believe
that it's not that Narcissa is blinded by love for Lucius Malfoy, but she is choosing the best option
of a bad batch. Lucius Malfoy is not a good man, you are correct, but the odds of him hurting her
or forcing her into terrible situations is lower than with other families. I don't know how much help
I can really be considering I basically told my arranged marriage to go fuck himself, but I would
suggest being blunt and completely honest with Narcissa. I know there is the possibility that she
will be upset, but she will never hate you, so really you are the best choice. Just let her know that
even though it's scary, there is always another option she wants. I will always be willing to help her
or you, Reg.

Feel free to write me back my cousin, I miss you dearly. I would love to hear what is new with you,

Andromeda
Regulus wrote back.
 Bloody Knuckles

James

Slim fingers slide against his back, making him shiver from the cold touch. The delicate hands that
had slipped beneath his uniform just minutes before, grazed against his taut muscles. His lips were
pressed against the boy's pressure point, sucking softly into the slim neck. He was pressed against a
lean body and there were legs wrapped tightly around him, unwilling to let him move too far away.
His own hands were somewhere between the boy and the sink that he was sitting on. One hand
gripping the side of the sink tightly, the only thing grounding him. The other hand placed on the
boy's thigh, his fingers splaying from the outer edge of the thigh to the inner portion. His hands
were slowly wandering higher and if he wasn't careful, the boy in front of him might realize that he
is trying to cop a feel in the boy's lavatories.

Regulus Black was not the quick fuck in the bathroom type of boy. He was the type of boy that
should always be made love to on a bed of rose petals with candles and poetry. James was well
aware that his boyfriend was too good for this kind of hookup, but also his boyfriend was fucking
hot. Sometimes when he saw Reggie, he just couldn't help himself, and that is exactly what
happened when he lured the Slytherin in here.

He had been walking through the halls after his last class of the day when he had caught the
Slytherins eye, and he made an excuse to abandon his friend in favor of using the nearby boy's
lavatory. It was hardly a moment later when an extraordinary pretty boy followed him into the
empty bathroom. The next thing he knew, his love was up on the sinks and James was making it
his personal mission to let everyone know that he was unavailable by marking the pale flesh of his
neck.

It was partially Regulus’s fault too because he had worn that god damn sweatshirt. The one that
had James’s name across the back, Regulus’s back, the one that made James feel ridiculously
possessive. Which was something he never thought he would feel for another person. He’s aware
that Regulus is his own person and that he can date whoever he wants, but when James sees him
sometimes all he can think is the word, mine. Regulus was his, but he really wasn't.

As soon as James had spotted him in that damn sweatshirt, Regulus had smirked. He knew exactly
what he was doing. He knew that he was driving James fucking mad. He didn't seem all that
surprised when James had ducked into the bathroom, as he followed a minute later. As soon as he
had walked in James had grabbed him, pressing a deep kiss on his gorgeous lips.

Luckily for them, this bathroom was not used very often or they would've been caught already.
This area of the castle was mainly where classes were held, and since classes ended a while ago
they should be fine. But it was risky, so damn risky that James couldn't believe that Regulus was
allowing it. Then again lately it had seemed as if both of them had completely forgotten that they
were supposed to be keeping their relationship on the down-low until everything was set for
Regulus to leave his parents.

Lately, every time the two of them met eyes it was like it was only them in the room. James would
catch Regulus looking at him across the Great Hall and it was like no one else existed, not even the
other Marauders. Regulus would smile at him when they passed each other in the corridors and
James’s heart would skip a beat. They would constantly lose track of time when they were
together, it was so hard to focus on anything but each other.

Regulus had decided to press charges against his parents about a week ago and since then their
relationship has advanced to a whole other level. Nothing had really changed yet. They still
couldn't go public because they were trying to make the legal procedures as clean as possible, and
it wouldn't help if the whole world knew about it. Regulus still refused to let James tell his friends,
specifically Sirius. But as soon as it was decided, their relationship had changed because for once
they had hope for their future together.

To be fair, James had hope for a future between them the entire time but now for the first time in
their relationship, it felt as if Regulus believed in it too. If Regulus could just get away from his
family then they could be together. They could have kids and a house together. They could grow
old together. It was the picture-perfect life in James’s opinion and now it was one step closer to
reality.

Regulus gasped as James nipped the skin on his neck. James grinned against Regulus’s skin,
Merlin, he loved the sounds he made. He peppered kisses up his neck until he reached his lips. He
poured every single emotion he felt for the possible future they held into that singular kiss. He
channeled all the love and fondness he had for his Bunny in that kiss. Regulus moaned into the
kiss and James tightened his grip on Regulus’s thighs.

“You've got to be fucking kidding me!” James jumped back as a voice called out from behind
them, but Regulus still had his legs around him. He turned his head abruptly and groaned. Damnit
this fucking guy.

Regulus wasn't as bothered as James would expect by his best friend walking in on them snogging.
Regulus just looked a bit surprised but he didn't jump away from James, he just slowly untangled
his legs from around his waist, “Barty! What are you doing here?”

Barty scoffed, glaring at James as if he had defiled his best friend or something. Maybe he had, but
Regulus had defiled him right back so it was an even trade. James glared right back at the little shit.
Barty walked closer, James tensed the closer he got, “Oh you know I was just wondering where my
best friend had gotten lost to, in between the DDA classroom and our common room? I was curious
as to why it would take a half-hour for him to get back, so I decided to go looking for him in case
he tripped and fell down the stairs or something, but imagine my surprise when I find that he just
tripped and fell on his boyfriend's dick instead.”

Except he hadn’t because Crouch was a total cockblock.

Barty turned his tense stare from Regulus, who was still sitting on the sink behind him, back to
James. His voice came out in a practiced calm, as if all he wanted to do in the world was punch
James in the face. James wouldn't be surprised if that was what he wanted, he knew of Crouch’s
reputation, “What did you just say?”

Fuck, had he said that out loud? Regulus lightly pushed James to the side and jumped off the sink
moving towards Crouch, speaking in a calming voice, “He was joking Barty, honestly if anyone
could enjoy a good dirty joke it should be you. Sorry, it took me so long but I was a little
distracted.”

Barty rolled his eyes, “Right, distracted. And I would've maybe enjoyed that joke from anyone but
him.”

He emphasized his point by motioning toward James. He had just about enough of Crouch and his
attitude, if anyone should have an attitude, it's him. James pulled Regulus back against his chest
and wrapped his arms around his body from behind. He stared at Crouch with smug conceit,
because as much as Crouch hated him, Regulus loved him.

“What the hell are you so smug about it, you pompous wanker?”

“What's the matter, Crouch? Are you jealous or something? Is that it? You want to be the one
Regulus wraps his legs around and moans against?”

Regulus made a noise of indignation struggling in James’s arms, clearly not happy to be a pawn in
the pissing contest the two boys were engaged in. Barty took a step toward James with a dangerous
look in his eyes, “What would you give you that idea? I'm not even into guys.”

James let out a humorless laugh, “Oh, is that right?”

Couch’s eyes flashed with realization and his eyes darted to Regulus in annoyance. James had not
been thrilled when Regulus had told him that Barty and he had shotgunned, or whatever it was
called, together. James hadn’t been sure what it was but Regulus had explained and it sounded sort
of intimate. He had also asked Sirius and Remus later if they knew what it was. Judging by Remus’
blushing and Sirius' self-satisfied smirk, they had done it a few times themselves, which did not fill
James with a whole lot of comfort.

James hated the fact that Barty Crouch's lips had touched his boyfriend’s. James had never been a
fan of Barty and he had not been shy in his encouraging Regulus to find different friends. But ever
since Regulus told James about how Barty had immediately sided with him when Regulus had
ended his friendship with Rosier, he had been willing to give him a chance. However, he had not
known that Barty had been after his best friend that entire time.

Regulus denied that it meant anything and insisted that Barty was just flirtatious when he was high.
James didn't really think that was excuse enough to kiss someone without their permission though.
James had felt his anger become more dormant when Regulus shared that Remy and Crouch both
knew of their relationship now. He had been glad that Regulus felt comfortable sharing it, but he
still hadn't forgotten about Crouch’s slip of the lips.

Regulus groaned, “Come on James. We talk–”

“If you were so opposed to kissing guys then why exactly did you put your lips on Regulus.”

Crouch’s jaw tensed, “It wasn't a kiss, it was just–”

“Shotgunning, right? Blowing smoke into another's mouth by attaching your lips. Sounds sort of
like kissing to me.”

“That's because you are a fucking idiot, Potter. I didn't mean to kiss Regulus so you can hop off my
case and get your possessiveness under control.”

James knew that he was being too possessive, but it was so damn hard to keep those feelings under
control. He took a deep breath and counted to five. He loosened his hold on Regulus, “Okay you're
right I am overreacting.” He took a step towards Barty, “But if you ever kiss him again without his
explicit permission I will fucking kill you. Do you hear me, Crouch?”

His throat worked and James knew that he wanted to start a fight, but he glanced back at Regulus
before nodding, backing down. Which was good because James honestly wasn't sure he could win
a physical fight against Barty Crouch. He was well aware of Crouch’s reputation and James really
was more of a lover than a fighter.

Regulus let out a loud laugh, one that had both Crouch and himself peering at him in confusion,
“Wow it appears the two of you have finally found some common ground. You know, you two
have a lot more in common than you think, it would be nice if you tried to get along.”

James huffed in annoyance as Crouch scoffed loudly, “Right, I'm sure we have a lot in common,
Reggie. I too, love getting in fistfights over someone bumping into me to the hall, not to mention
my favorite pastime of picking on muggle-borns until they cry.”

Crouch let out a sharp laugh, which made James shoot him a glare, “Okay Potter, out of the two of
us, only one of us has the reputation of being a bully and I think its best you remember that.”

“Excuse me. No, I fucking don't. I am not a bully, no one thinks that, you fucking prat!”

This had Crouch laughing once again and when James looked at Regulus, the boy was purposely
not meeting his eyes, “Reg?”

Regulus looked up at him, seeming a little hesitant, “Sorry, but at least in Slytherin you are
considered to be a bit of a bully.”

James couldn't believe it. He couldn't fucking believe it.

And fucking Crouch just adored the look of shock on his face as he taunted joyishly, “Oh Merlin,
this is priceless. Regs, he really didn't know! What did you think that you were mercilessly picking
on Slytherin students out of the goodness of your heart? How much more of a sanctimonious prick
can you be?”

Sanctimonious? Him? He didn’t think that he was morally superior to anyone. He wasn't bullying
anyone, was he? He had just been getting revenge for all the students that the Slytherins had picked
on before. Hadn’t he been? He never really targeted specific Slytherin students, well except
Snivellus of course, but didn’t most Slytherins partake in that type of behavior? Well, Regulus
didn’t, so maybe there were others that weren't a part of it either, but James didn't know that for
sure. Had he been lumping all the Slytherin students under the acts of a few?
Regulus stepped up to him and put a reassuring hand on his arm and James immediately felt more
relaxed under his touch, “Jamie it's okay, I know you didn't mean it in that way.”

Another burst of laughter was heard and James didn't even bother looking over at the guffawing
prick. He focused on Regulus’ soft touch, but that didn't stop him from hearing, “Jamie? Oh, that's
just priceless. The big bad Gryffindor prankster has a soft side for his boyfriend, it's honestly
adorable.”

“Fuck off, Barty.” James was pleasantly surprised to hear that come from not himself, but from
Reggie instead. He smirked at Barty who looked sufficiently annoyed.

Barty's face turned sour at James’ smug smirk and he looked at Reg with an inquisitive look,
“Regulus be honest, you are attracted to this utter berk?”

Regulus let out a little giggle that James couldn't help but smile at. He adored this boy. His heart
fluttered at the sound of Regulus’s laugh, “I do. Barty, I really do.”

The Slytherin’s face twists in derision, “I just don't get it. This knob doesn't even know how to
brush his hair properly.”

“At least I'm not so pale people mistake me for the living dead.”

“Your boyfriend is just as pale as me, you minger.”

James snorted because that was true. Regulus was just as pale, if not paler than the boy in front of
him, but he made it look good while Barty just looked sick. He wrapped an arm around Regulus’s
waist, looking at his pretty porcelain skin, “True enough, but he makes it look good.” James lets his
hand slide to Regulus’s face, turning his bunny's chin towards him. He didn't look back at Barty as
he stared down at Regulus’s lips, which were parting in anticipation, “While you do not.”

Before Crouch could continue this pointless argument, he leans in and presses a kiss on Regulus’s
perfect lips. He’s pleased when Regulus deepens the kiss with no regard for his friend being there,
who no doubt was gaping at them. Just for show, James dips Regulus in an incredibly dramatic
way, as they continued to snog.

All James heard before Crouch stormed out of the bathroom was, “Fucking Potter.”
They pulled away a few moments after Crouch had disappeared and Regulus’s eyes seemed to be
dancing with amusement at his friend's temper tantrum. James smiled down at him, feeling
extremely self-satisfied, “Well I don't think he likes me very much.”

Regulus grinned and James felt his heart jump again, “Hmm I think that the feeling is very much
mutual, don't you?”

James grinned back because honestly, Regulus had the most addictive smile. If there was one thing
James could do all day, then it was to watch Regulus smile and listen to his laugh. James was so
distracted by that smile that he almost missed what Regulus said next, “He will come around and
you will too. Soon you two will be inseparable.”

James wholeheartedly disagreed.

***************************************************************************************

Blood. There was blood all over Regulus’s hands and his wand. His wand was pointed at his
opponent, viciously battering Avery’s head against the dirt, while his other hand was brutally
slamming into Mulciber’s face as the boy underneath him attempted to protect himself. The two
boys' wands were scattered across the lawn, nowhere near in their reach. That was the first thing
Regulus had been sure to do, make them helpless.

James had no idea that this would be the sight that would greet him when he convinced the other
Marauders to join him by the lake during lunch. It was the first nice day they had in what seemed
to be the longest February of his life. It was unusual that the snow melted this quickly in Scotland,
but it was one of those rare phenomena winters. There was still snow on the ground, but there were
a lot of areas that had been cleared of the frigid white substance. It wasn't particularly warm, but it
was a nice change from the usually bitter cold.

When they were walking to the lake, James had seen Mulciber’s little crew arrange themselves by
a tree not too far away. He had pretty much forgotten all about them until they headed back up to
the school. It was a little over halfway through lunch when they decided to get some food before
class, as Peter insisted that they wouldn't be able to study on empty stomachs.

Sirius had accused Peter of thinking with his stomach rather than his brain, but James secretly was
pretty hungry too. So he was all for it when they started their trek back to school.
That was right about when they noticed it. They were still pretty far from the tree the Slytherins
had placed themselves around, but they could definitely see some kind of disturbance happening
ahead. As they got closer, James could make out Regulus standing toe to toe with Mulciber.

“What the fuck?” Sirius voiced James’ exact thoughts from beside him. Regulus looked so small
compared to the brutishness of Mulciber. Avery was standing just behind Mulciber looking
menacing on his own. Snape was nearby with a nasty smile twisting at his lips. Rosier seemed to
be hanging back close to the tree but that didn't mean he wouldn't get involved. The younger
Yaxley appeared to be flanking Avery, attempting to seem as threatening as the older boys.

It was quite an uncommon sight, Slytherins fighting in public. It was something, one never really
saw as an outsider. Obviously, Regulus had inferred that there was a lot more that went on in the
house than one saw, but the house was pretty good about keeping their business internal. There was
absolutely nothing internal about this disagreement. This was airing out a Slytherin dispute right in
front of everyone.

Remus was ever the voice of reason, “I'm sure it's nothing. They're probably just arguing about
quidditch or something.”

That was a valid theory actually. Regulus was on the quidditch team with most of the boys by the
tree. It could very easily be just a disagreement on strategy or something. Or at least it could've
been, if Regulus hadn’t just taken a swing at Mulciber’s face, knocking him on his ass.

Oh fuck.

James didn't even hesitate as he started towards the scene. His peripheral vision showed he wasn't
the only one who had this thought, as he saw Sirius matching his stride. He heard Peter and Remus
hastening to catch up behind him. He instantly felt better knowing his friends would have his back,
because there was no way he was about to let his boyfriend fight this Slytherin scum by himself.

As they got closer they could hear the sounds of people yelling. There weren't a whole lot of
people who decided to skip lunch in favor of the warm weather, but there was enough to bear
witness to the fight that was taking place.

“What the fuck, Regulus!”

“Merlin!”

“He's fucking mad, isn't he?”

In the time it had taken them to reach the scene, Regulus had taken advantage of Mulciber being
on the ground and grabbed his wand from his pocket. He threw it somewhere near the lake,
completely taking it out of the equation of this fight.

As Mulciber scrambled to get up, Avery lunged for Regulus, his wand in hand. That's all it took for
Regulus to squarely kick Avery in the groin, grabbing the wand from his hand as the boy fell to his
knees. He threw the wand as far as he could once again. James winced as Avery whined on the
ground clutching himself. Merlin, Reggie played dirty.

Suddenly all the Slytherin boys, aside from Rosier who looked like he was going to be vaguely ill,
advanced on Regulus. James didn’t think as he pointed his wand at Snivellous and called out,
“Levicorpus!”

At the same time, he heard Sirius call out the same spell. James had a moment of concern, as two
people really shouldn’t be casting that on the same person at a time. His fear was quickly relieved
when he saw that Sirius hadn’t cast it on Snivellous, but instead on the young Yaxley. James
looked up at the two boys struggling in the air, completely out of reach of Regulus, and smiled.
Until he saw Snivellous reaching into his sock for his wand. Luckily James has the best friends
ever, because he heard Peter and Remus call out, “Expelliarmus!”

Two wands fly behind James, most likely into the waiting hands of his friends. James looks at
Sirius and finds his friend is already smirking at him. Two down and two more to go.

James focused his attention on Regulus. He was supremely surprised to see Regulus taking on both
Mulciber and Avery, and he was winning.

Regulus looked feral. James had never seen that look in his eye before and frankly, it scared him a
bit. Mulciber, Avery, and he were engaged in an all-out brawl and Regulus was holding his own
fairly well. Wizards weren't known to be physical fighters, there were only a few boys in Hogwarts
that seemed to be prone to physical violence. Mulciber was one of them.

James must’ve missed part of the fight when he was getting Snape under control, because he truly
didn’t know how Regulus had ended up on top of Mulciber hitting him like his life depended on it.
Mulciber was covering his face with his arms, but considering the blood on Reg’s fists he had
taken a few to the face first.

Avery looked like he had been punched a few times too as he shakily stood up from where he had
been sprawled out. He took confident steps to Regulus, swinging his fist into Regulus’s cheekbone,
hard. Regulus looked surprised by the contact but the punch hadn’t moved him off of Mulciber.
Instead, he whipped out his wand as Avery pulled back for another punch, speaking an incantation
softly.

What the spell was, James wasn’t sure because he had never seen a hex like this one. Avery
launched himself at the ground and began mercilessly beating his own head against the hard dirt.
Regulus focused back on Mulciber who had begun to struggle once more, realizing that Regulus
was distracted. Mulciber had his hand around Regulus’s neck and James knew he was holding
tight. It didn’t stop Regulus as he slammed his fist into Mulciber’s nose and a spray of blood few
up against Regulus’s face.

Mulciber gave up his hold in favor of protecting his face once more. Regulus looked fucking
unhinged as he had one bloody hand on a wand that was beating someone's head against the ground
and the other was crashing into another boy's face.

Holy fuck. James was stuck. He physically couldn't move as he watched his sweet Bunny brutalize
a boy that was bigger than him, two boys that were bigger than him. His fists were bloody, but it
wasn't his own blood. His beautiful face was sprouting a dark red mark from the punch Avery had
landed. His usually perfect hair was practically disastrous. His eyes were wild and they held this
cold rage in them that sent a shiver down James’s back.

There were a few other students who had been lounging around outside during lunch, but none
seemed keen to get in the middle of this altercation. James knew that he had to stop this, “Regulus!
Reg, stop!”

Regulus’s shoulders tensed for a second, but then Mulicber said something, and instantly that
unhinged Regulus was back, hitting Mulciber even harder as the boy covered his face with his
arms the best he could. James reluctantly let Snape down before marching over to Regulus,
knowing no matter what people thought, he had to stop this.

Suddenly Barty Crouch was there and pulling Regulus off Mulciber, James stopped where he was.
Barty struggled to hold the angry Regulus back as he yelled, “What the fuck, Regulus? I left you
alone for twenty minutes!”
James didn't hear the full extent of the conversation, but Mulciber spat out something that seemed
to shock Crouch. Regulus struggled against Barty with new energy. There was that look again, the
one that told him that Regulus would do anything to hurt the boy in front of him. It scared James
how feral Reg looked.

Barty bit out something at Mulciber before he began dragging Regulus away. Remy met them at
the edge of the circle with what James knew was Regulus’ book bag. Barty turned around and
glared at the few people standing around just before they departed the circle completely, “None of
you saw anything, unless you want to deal with me.”

As he ended that threat, his eyes lingered on James before he dragged Regulus away again, leaving
James to look at what his boyfriend had done.

Mulciber was getting to his feet, rather slowly, looking wrecked. His nose was bloody and broken
by the looks of it, he had nasty bruises forming under his eye and on his chin. He looked livid and
humiliated, which James supposed was understandable. That certainly hadn’t been what the great
brute had expected when he started picking on a boy nearly half his size. He was leaning slightly to
his left side, so James suspected the boy had injured his ribs.

Honestly, he was lucky those were the only injuries he came away with, probably due to his
abnormally quick thinking in curling his arms around his head. James looked at Avery who looked
worse for wear. He didn't have much more than a trickle of blood from a split lip visible, but the
dazed look on his face practically screamed that he had a concussion. James wasn't surprised by the
way Regulus had him slamming his head against the ground. Merlin, what had he even been
thinking?

Snape had already run off, leaving his friends as soon as James let him down. The Yaxley kid had
been released too and he immediately began fetching the two older boys' wands from the yard.
Rosier had not moved the entire time from his place leaning against the tree and he still didn’t. He
looked unsure, what he was unsure of, James didn't know.

The few students that had witnessed the interaction looked a little concerned and James didn’t have
to guess what they were thinking. Had the Slytherin prince finally gone mad? James wanted to
snarl at their whispers and gossip about Regulus. They didn't know why Regulus had done what he
had done, so they had no business gossiping about him. Then again James didn't know why either,
so who was he to judge?

Remus began steering Sirius away from the scene of the crime and James felt Peter pulling him
away too. They were eager to get as far away as possible before a teacher got involved. James
hoped everyone heeded Crouch’s words because he really didn't want Regulus to go down for this.
It was already going to be hard enough for him to live in the same house as them without the
professors getting involved.

As they walked across the lawn back to the school, Peter was the first to say what they were all
thinking, “Well I don't know about you, but I really wish we would've just gone to lunch.”

************************************************************************

Barty

As he sat across from his best friend in the entire world, he wondered how the fuck this could’ve
happened. First, how is the one time Regulus actually gets into a fight, Barty isn't there to back him
up? Honestly, it's like Regulus purposely waited until Barty walked away to get in a fight, and one
with multiple people to boot. Barty was good in a fight, and he definitely could have helped
Regulus, instead of his wanker of a brother and his even more wankerish boyfriend. They had
hardly even helped, just kept the other two boys contained as Regulus did the dirty work. At least
Rosier hadn’t gotten involved, if he had then Barty would have to have a little talk with him and he
was trying to be a better person.

Second, he wondered why Regulus had snapped the way he did. Barty hadn’t seen the entire fight,
he had been down at the lake flirting with this Hufflepuff he had been seeing lately when he visited
Remy, but imagine his surprise when he came back up the hill to where he left Regulus, to find him
in an all-out brawl with two boys bigger them himself and winning. That's what had surprised him
the most, the fact that Regulus was without a doubt winning the fight, in fact, he was absolutely
kicking their asses. Barty honestly didn't think Regulus had it in him, but he was pleasantly
surprised to see those assholes actually get taught a lesson for once. Still, Barty really hadn't
recognized that look in Regulus' eyes, it was so wild, he didn't mind it but judging by the look on
Potter’s face, others felt differently about the whole interaction.

Lastly, he wondered what the hell Mulciber had meant when he said that Regulus’ mommy and
daddy can't protect him if he doesn't have the Black name. He also said a few other choice words
such as blood traitor, scum, and mudblood lover. The only thing that he could think of that would
start a fight like this, is if they found out about Potter. But Potter wasn't a mudblood, so it could be
about his friendship with Remy, but that was practically already common knowledge already. No
one had dared ever mess with Regulus before because of his family name, but it was clear
Mulciber didn't think the name could protect him any longer. Which meant that he was missing
some crucial information for the story.

No, the boy in front of him had lied to Barty in some way and it was about damn time he came
clean. Barty had healed the bruising on Regulus’s cheek and hands, all the evidence that he was in
a fight, was gone. Barty was pretty sure that Regulus would get away with it, he was going to be an
alibi for him and there was no way his precious boyfriend would turn him in.
Regulus was staring down at his fists, probably contemplating how he had managed to slam them
into Mulciber’s face so many times. He looked, contemplative like he still wasn't exactly sure what
had happened. Barty was sure Mulicber was thinking the same thing right about now. They were
probably in the hospital wing getting treated for their injuries. From what Barty saw, they probably
wouldn't be there for more than a few hours, Madam Pomfrey worked quickly.

He cleared his throat, hoping Regulus would look up at him, but he stayed staring at his fingers,
“So you want to tell me what Mulciber was talking about?”

He didn't look up at Barty, but he did mumble out a response, “Not particularly.”

Barty leaned forward, his hands clasped together on his knees, in that disappointed authority figure
way, “Well that's too bad. Now tell me.”

Regulus sighed heavily, but he must've realized that there wasn't any way he got out of here
without telling Barty what had happened, “When I went back home at Christmas, I was a little
worried about my parents finding out about Remy or James. I had used my occlumency to hide
them pretty deep in my mind, but there's always that concern when my mother is around. I didn't
see my parents until Christmas Eve, they had lulled me into a false sense of security. On Christmas
Eve we had dinner with the rest of my family and the entire night it seemed as if my parents were
snapping at me for everything. Then when everyone left them– they–”

Regulus paused, finally looking up at Barty who nodded his head waiting for Regulus to continue,
“My mother used legitimacy and at the time I had thought that she had somehow found them, even
though they were buried deep. I found out later though, that Evan ha– had told his mother about my
friendship with Remy. She was just using my memories to verify what Mrs. Rosier had already told
her. She–” His breath hitched as he spoke, “She used some painful spells on me including the
Cruciatus.”

It was Barty's turn to gasp, who in their right mind would use the Cruciatus on their son. That's
right, Walpurga Black was never in her right mind. Regulus continued, “She wanted to know
Remy’s name, apparently Evan didn't tell his mother that. I wouldn't give it to her, so she didn't
stop until I couldn't speak any longer. Kreacher took me back to Hogwarts where they patched me
up. Dumbledore asked me if I wanted to go back and I told him no. They asked me if I wanted to
press charges and I told him at the end of the break that I would. I ended up spending the rest of
the break with the Potters. Everything was supposed to stay pretty hush-hush till the trial, but I
guess my mother had other ideas. She must've told all her friends and they must've passed along
the message. It won't be long before everyone knows.”

Barty took a minute to process all that information. He wanted to hurt Walpurga Black so badly he
could feel it in his blood and bones. The rage he felt for that woman was nearly all-consuming. It
was all he could do to keep a straight face with Regulus. Walpurga was out of his reach for the
moment, but he would get her eventually. Not everyone was out of his reach though.

He stood up, knowing exactly what needed to be done now. Regulus looked at him curiously,
asking warily, “What are you doing?”

Barty ruffled Regulus’s hair in the way he knew the boy hated, as he walked by him towards the
door, calling over his shoulder, “I'll take care of it. Don’t worry.”

********************************************************************

James

Traumatic events often cause a victim or even a bystander to experience moments of disconnect
and fright during instances that aren’t typically considered stressful. Meaning that moments that
are considered life-threatening or safety threatening can cause real anger and fear that doesn't go
away when one realizes they are away from danger. James honestly didn't know that much about
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but he knew that Sirius had it when he came to live with the
Potters, after that night.

Sirius didn't find peace immediately with the Potters, it seemed like everything was a trigger for
him for a while. The Persian rug his mother had in the dining room, made Sirius feel like he was
convulsing on the rug back in the Black house, Effie threw it out the next day. Antique gold-
rimmed plates, unmarked potion bottles, magical figurines of any kind, wine goblets, family
pictures, manicured fingers, and silver jewelry also provoked a response from him.

Not everything had as intense of response as the rug had, sometimes it would be him lost in his
own head as he stared at them. They tried everything to keep him away from things that would
remind him of what they had done to him. The pain that they had caused him, but there was always
something to remind him.

He had seemed better since coming back to school, but James knew there was always the
possibility that he would have another attack. Every response was different for him, they didn't all
cause him pain. Sometimes he would get angry for no apparent reason and James would know that
something had triggered him. Sometimes he would get sad quite suddenly and James also could
recognize that as an attack.

James had been thinking about it since they had gotten back to the dorms after their classes that
day. He had been thinking about Sirius’s PTSD and how Regulus might be suffering from the same
thing. That was the only way he could think to describe what they had witnessed earlier that day.

It wasn't that he didn't think Mulciber or Avery deserved it, but it was so unlike Regulus to solve
anything with a fight. He was usually more prone to verbal sparing, using his intelligence to knock
down an opponent. Today he might not have started the argument but he had started the fight and
ended it.

Regulus had seemed so out of control with rage. Regulus had been through nearly the same tragic
event as Sirius had when he came to live with the Potters. It was only logical that their side effects
might be similar. Still, Sirius had never been that way during his fits.

He wanted to see Regulus, wanted to talk to him and make sure he was okay. He wanted to hold
him until the memories of that night, of what she did to him, were gone. But he couldn't leave
Sirius, so he had to hope that Crouch could be there with him for the moment, as distasteful as that
thought was.

No, James was needed here at the moment. Sirius was not having a good reaction to what his
brother had done earlier. He had been acting weird all afternoon, quiet and unapproachable.
Randomly he will start talking to himself, but it never seemed to make any sense.

Remus comforted him with kisses and promises of things James would rather pretend his friends
didn't do. Peter had been telling Sirius his juiciest secrets, not about the other Marauders, of course,
all afternoon to get some sort of response from him. James actually hadn’t done much, so far. He
has been so caught up in his own thoughts about everything that he hasn't tried much in the way of
helping his friend. Great, this afternoon he was being a bad boyfriend and a bad best friend.

Remus and Peter had left not long ago to go to the kitchens to see if Sirius’ favorite snacks would
cheer him up. James secretly wondered if they were doing it for him as well as Sirius, he had seen
the concerned looks they had been throwing him all afternoon. They clearly thought that he should
be affected by what he watched today too and he was a little bit.

“He looked just like my mother.” James jumped, he whipped his head to Sirius who was sitting on
his own bed, looking at the floor. James had been reclined on his bed and the last thing he expected
to hear from Sirius was that.

“What?”
James leaned up in his bed as Sirius peered over at him, his eyes fuzzy and unfocused, “Regulus.
Today he looked just like our mother.”

James shivered at the thought of comparing Reggie, his sweet little Bunny, to that heinous monster,
“Why do you say that?”

James was startled when he let out a sharp little laugh, though there was no amusement in his tone,
“The look in his eyes. He has our mother's eyes, but I've never seen him with the same detachment

as hers, except for today. The type of emotional detachment that one can only have if they've given
into the insanity of their bloodline.”

James felt a cold dread fill his blood, his voice came out a little hoarse, “What does that mean?”

Sirius didn't seem to notice the harshness of James’ voice, “It means my brother is officially
insane, James.”

“You can't know that.”

Sirius gave him a disbelieving look, “Come on, you saw what I saw out there, right? He was
absolutely unhinged. You know, the sad part is that I am not all that shocked. I mean I've dreaded
it, of course, I never wanted him to turn out like her. But the way he's been acting like their little
puppet the past few years, it was probably inevitable.”

“No,” James was shocked by how rough his voice sounded. “I don't think that's necessarily true.
Exposure can’t make you behave like someone else. Otherwise, I would be a prat like you by
now.”

Sirius didn't laugh at James’ dreadful attempt at a joke, but he turned to look at James curiously,
“How do you have so much faith in humanity?”

James was at a loss. It wasn't that he had so much faith in humanity, it was that he had faith in
Regulus. As confused as he was about the scene earlier today, there has been no part of him that
considered Regulus to be bad. James remembers a time when Sirius was the same way and he
wonders when that exact change was. He pushes his luck, “Do you remember our first year here?”
Sirius looked bewildered at the change of subject and James continued, “I had been so excited to
make new friends. I was an only child and I had never had a close bond with someone else my
age.”

“James I really do–”

“Then on the train, I met Moony, then Peter, and then this poncy prat.” Sirius’s eyes softened at the
mention of their first meeting and he stopped trying to interrupt James, “I hit it off with them
immediately. It was an incredible feeling, and it wasn’t long before I considered them to be part of
my family. Especially the poncy one, him I considered to be my brother. All my life I had dreamed
of having a brother and now I had one, a pretentious one, but a brother nonetheless. The only
problem was that my new brother already had a brother that he adored, which I can admit now
made me insanely jealous.”

Sirius looked a little uncomfortable at that and James wondered if it was the mention of his
jealousy or the indication that Sirius used to adore his brother that brought it on. “Sirius, the poncy
boy, had a younger brother that he talked about nonstop. I had thought that this boy must be
something pretty incredible to be worthy of the praise his brother gave him. Then, I met him for the
first time on the train my second year and I didn't get it.”

Sirius looked surprised by that answer, which James figured was understandable. He had never
actually told Sirius how much he didn't understand Sirius’ obsession with his little brother those
first few years. “I was supposed to be meeting this incredible person, who was so important to my
favorite person in the world, and I was underwhelmed. He was just a kid, scrawny and awkward
like the rest of us. It took me a long time to figure it out but when I did, I knew there was no way I
could ever compete with the prudish little brother.”

Sirius croaked out, his voice sounding a little wrecked as if this story was taking his emotions
through the wringer, “What did you figure out?”

James smiled a little in a sad pitiful way, as he was reminded of the day he discovered he was never
really going to be Sirius’s brother, “I figured out that no matter what I did, I was never going to be
your brother.” Sirius started to interrupt but stopped when James held up his hand, “Listen at the
time it really depressed me, but it’s been so long it really doesn't matter now. That's not to say I
don't still consider you my brother, Pads. I do, I really do. I know that you love me and I love you,
but I will never be your brother because you already have one. It doesn't matter if you guys fight all
the time, or if you are disowned, and it really doesn't matter that you hardly talk. He will always be
your brother and I will not. Shortly after I made that discovery I came across another one. The
reason you talked about Regulus as if he could do no wrong, was because you raised him.”

Sirius’s eyes widened, “I did not raise him.”

“Yeah, I'm sure the mother that never even held you as a baby was so much more affectionate with
him than she was you, right? You raised yourself and then you raised him. The reason you thought
he was so incredible, was because he was exactly the little brother you wanted. Then you both
came to school and you grew apart, but the fact that you raised him never changed. Tell me, who
taught Regulus how to read?”

Sirius’s voice was rough and James considered that he might be on the verge of tears, “Mostly the
governess, but I taught him the basics.”

“Who taught him to play games?”

“I did.”

James smiled, for some reason he felt as if he was getting somewhere, “Who taught Regulus how
to walk and crawl and talk?”

Sirius let out a sound that sounded similar to a sob, “I did.”

James got off the bed and walked over to Sirius. The boy looked up from his hands, his face
streaming with tears. James sat down and put an arm around his friend. Sirius leaned into him and
James’ voice turned to a soft consistency, “So you ask me how I have so much faith in humanity,
but you are asking the wrong question. I don't have more faith in humanity than you, I just have
faith that you did a better job raising him than you think. You look at this fight as a negative, and
I'll admit there was plenty wrong with it, but did you ever consider that maybe Regulus had been
wrong most of his life and he only just realized it? Maybe he’s following in your footsteps?”

James believed everything he was saying, he really did. Otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to
face Sirius this way. James did think that Sirius had a lot more of an effect on Regulus than he
believed. He saw it every time he spent time with Regulus. The way Reggie’s eyes sparked with
subtle amusement anytime James told him about a prank, even though he claimed to despise them.
The way he eats snacks like they are a full meal, just like Sirius always did. The way he focused on
hair care like it was a religion.

He knew he couldn't tell his friend about all the ways James knew Sirius had affected Regulus, but
he wondered if he might get there on his own if given the chance. Honestly, James had never had
any plan of talking to Sirius about this, but lately, James had been putting more and more thought
into Sirius and Regulus’ relationship.
He wanted them to reconnect, but he also knew that pushing either of the Black brothers was a
terrible idea, they were stubborn as hell. James was worried about telling Sirius about his and
Reg’s relationship. He had been begging Regulus to let him tell Sirius for a while now, but now
that the time was more than likely drawing closer, he was concerned. He had no idea how Sirius
would react but he doubted it was going to be good. He knew that it was a better idea for the two
brothers to reconnect and be on good terms before they told Sirius and time was running out for
that to happen. As he said, he was worried about Sirius' reaction to him dating his beloved little
brother, he was terrified of Sirius’ reaction to him dating his despised brother. If this story could
help the two mend fences then James would be thrilled.

The door opened behind them after a few minutes of silence, Sirius' tears seemed to be dried, but
James was sure Peter and Remus could see them as they came to sit near them. Remus wrapped an
arm around Sirius from his other side, Sirius immediately shifted so he was leaning into him
instead. James took the cue and went over to sit across from them, next to Peter.

Peter looked vaguely uncomfortable as he cleared his throat, “So, we ran into Marnie Stilter down
by the kitchens.” James had only just realized that the two boys had set the snacks on the desk near
the door. He looked at it curiously wondering why they would set it all the way over there. And
why was Peter talking about Marnie Stilter, he knew that Pete found her annoying. She was also
very big into gossip, but Peter claimed that she had no cunning when looking for a story. James
thought that Peter was probably just jealous because a lot of times she got the story first. “She had
heard about the fight.”

Oh, so Marnie had mentioned the fight and that's why Peter was mentioning it? Still, it didn't really
make sense, people were bound to find out about the fight, and it was no surprise.

“According to her, no one knows exactly who was involved but Avery and Mulciber are in the
hospital wing.” So Barty had been able to threaten people into not mentioning Regulus’s name,
that was actually good news. Peter glanced at him and frowned slightly at the relief that must've
shown on his face, “They're going to be in overnight, possibly all day tomorrow.”

What? Their injuries were in no way that bad. They should've been in and out in a few hours at
most. Why the hell would Pomfrey be keeping them that long?

Sirius must've had the same thoughts, “What? Regulus didn't injure them that bad. I mean, it was
bad, but they shouldn't be kept overnight for those injuries.”

Remus nodded, looking grim as he held Sirius close, “Yeah, they aren't being kept for the injuries
in the fight. No, they actually were already released for those. That's when Crouch found them.”
Crouch? Crouch put them back in the hospital wing? Merlin that guy really had a temper. James
isn't proud of it but he actually feels a little more content knowing that Regulus’s best friend has his
back. Not just has his back, but has it to the point that if someone looks at Reg funny they won't
ever do it again. The rest of the Marauders did not feel the same way as James. In fact, they
seemed possibly sickened by Barty Crouch’s rage.

“Merlin, that kid really is a fucking psycho, isn't he?”

“What kind of a person attacks someone as soon as they leave the hospital wing?”

“That boy is going to end up in either Askaban or St. Mungo's psychiatric ward, mark my words.”

It was only after they all shared their mutual feelings on Crouch’s mental state, with James lazily
nodding along, that Peter spoke in that hesitant voice again, “Sirius, um there's something else we
found out that I think you should know.”

Peter glanced at James, the guilt on his face told him that he wasn't going to like whatever Peter
said next. He looked at Remus, who held a grim expression as if he really didn't want to be the one
who told Sirius this next one.

Sirius looked slightly more aware after hearing about Barty Crouch, “What is it, Pete?”

Peter sighed and to James’ surprise he set his hand on James’s knee as if this news was for James
too, “Marnie also found out what the fight was about, and apparently, most of the school knows
now. That's why I feel like you need to know this right away.” James was suddenly very nervous to
hear what the fight was about. He had assumed it was something quidditch or Slytherin related but
maybe it was something else, “The other Slytherins picked a fight with Regulus because they are
upset that he is… pressing charges against your parents for abuse and neglect.”

You could hear a pin drop in the room. Peter squeezed his knee slightly, in an attempt to be subtly
comforting. The thing was James wasn't the one that needed to be comforted at the moment. He
had already known about this, but Sirius certainly hadn’t. He had quite literally just been telling
James how Regulus was just his mother's puppet.

Sirius looked distraught and confused. He didn't seem to be able to comprehend what he had just
heard. That is until he stood up and began walking to the door. James felt a wave of panic go
through him, “Where are you going?”

Sirius turned his head slightly as his hand reached for the doorknob, “I think it's about time Reggie
and I have a conversation.”

Shit, this could either go really well or it would be a fucking disaster, either way, Sirius was
already gone. Fuck.

Remus looked at James’s panic-stricken face, raising an eyebrow curiously, “So James, why don't
you tell me why you look more concerned that Sirius is going to talk to Regulus than you do about
what Peter just told you?”

Bollocks, James really had to start being more honest if he was going to keep getting caught in his
lies.
 Fire and Ice
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

James

James was fucked, totally and completely fucked. Or at least it felt that way. Remus was currently
looking at him with an expression of mistrust, which is the very last thing James wanted. Though
he couldn't exactly blame Moony, as he had been keeping secrets from them all year. James was
well aware that Remus had a less than favorable opinion of his recent penchant for dishonesty.

James didn't enjoy keeping secrets, but he also refused to betray Regulus’ trust. He really didn't
think it was a good idea to broadcast what had taken place over Christmas to his friends. Now
though, it seemed as if at least part of the truth had escaped anyways.

Peter and Remus were looking at him like his parents did whenever he did something wrong. Peter
had his arms folded and was standing near the window with a slight frown. Remus was sitting on
Sirius’s bed, fixing James with an inquisitive look. James probably looked as much of a scolded
child as he felt.

“James, are you going to answer my question, or are you going to continue to look down at your
fingers?”

James was beginning to sweat profusely, “Uh what was the question again?”

Why the hell did he say that? He was perfectly clear with what Remus asked him. Merlin, he really
knew how to make things worse.

Remus’s face darkened in annoyance and suspicion, “I asked why you didn't seem surprised by
Regulus pressing charges against Walpurga and Orion.”

Fuck. James looked at Peter, searching for some backup, but he only found Peter narrowing his
eyes instead. He cleared his throat and began, “I wasn't surprised by the news because I already
knew about it.”
“Of course you fucking did! Honestly, James, is there anything you don't lie to us about these
days?” Remus was angry, he was really angry. James understood why, but he still didn't enjoy his
friend's words.

James stuttered out a response, “I- uh no I– I mean yes, fuck I don't know.”

“You don't know? Really James? You don't know whether there is more stuff you are keeping
from us or you don't know if you will lie to us again?”

James was at a loss for words.

Peter on the other hand was slightly calmer, though James could tell he was also unhappy, “James,
did Regulus tell you himself or did you find out another way? How long have you known about
this? Why didn't you tell us? I understand not wanting to out Regulus but really this is the type of
thing Sirius deserved to know before the rest of the school, wouldn't you agree?”

James knew that, he really did. There had been countless times since Christmas that he had
considered telling Sirius, but something always stopped him. Regulus had told him that he didn't
want Sirius to know about them yet and as much as that killed him, he would obey his wishes. But
this? This wasn't about his and Reggie’s relationship, Peter was right about that.

This was about an abused boy who finally realized that his parents weren't good for him. This was
about someone finally standing up to their family after years of neglect and abuse. This was about a
boy who finally followed in his big brother's lead and made the decision to do better for himself.

And Peter was right, Sirius did deserve to know this. Maybe his friend had never said it but James
knew that if there was one thing Sirius would wish for, it would be for Regulus to be his brother
again. To be away from their abusive parents, so that he could be sure that he was safe. Damn it,
why did James fuck up every time he tried to do the right thing? It seemed as though every time he
tried to help Regulus, he ended up inadvertently hurting Sirius.

He buried his face in his hands leaning on his knees trying to figure out howt was possible that the
amazing Euphemia and Fleamont Potter had managed to raise such a fuck up. “I'm sorry, okay? I– I
didn't really think it would get out so fast. I just wanted to give Regulus a little time to recover
before…”

He trailed off not really wanting to say what he was thinking, but Remus beat him to it, “Before
what? Before his older brother tracks him down to hear all the gory details and bring him right
back into what must've been a terrible memory if it resulted in him pressing charges against his
parents.”

Remus was right on the money as always, he nodded hesitantly. Remus sighed deeply but he didn't
seem as angry as he had been a moment before, “So exactly what he's doing now then? That's what
you were trying to prevent?”

James looked up surprised to see a bit of sympathy in Remus’s eyes, “Yeah, sort of.”

“Sort of?”

James sighed deeply, knowing this answer would not please Remus, “I thought that this would
happen if Sirius found out and I was sort of trying to protect Regulus from it, but that might not
have been the only reason.”

“And what exactly were these other reasons?”

James grimaced at the question, “That's the thing. There really isn't another valid reason, just every
time that I thought it would be worth it to tell Sirius, something stopped me. I don’t know what it
was exactly, it could have been fear but that doesn't really make sense, Sirius would never hurt
Regulus. This is going to sound terrible, especially since I want Sirius and Regulus to be close
again, but I think that a part of me didn't want to share either of them with each other.”

Remus gaped at him for a moment, before he looked to Peter and then back to James, “That is the
most selfish thing I have ever heard in my life, James.”

James buried his head back in his hands, feeling like a world-class asshole, “Fuck I know. I felt
sleazy even saying it but I don't know what else could be the reason that I couldn't make myself
tell him. I physically couldn't anytime I considered it. I can't think of any other reason other than
me being a selfish prick.”

Peter broke his silence, sounding oddly certain, “I can.” James turned to look at his friend,
perplexed, “James you are the least selfish person I have ever meant. I know you have all this guilt
from hiding your relationship from Sirius but that doesn't change the person you are. You are the
person who saw three lonely boys on the train at only eleven and gifted them with the best friends
of their lives. You are the person who saw their best friend in an abusive home life and helped him
escape. Those are not the actions of a selfish person. You can't figure out why you couldn't tell
Sirius about Regulus yourself. You are making up ideas about you not wanting them to reconcile
even though that is practically all you have talked to me about since Halloween. The real reason
you can't make yourself tell Sirius is a lot more simple than you're making it.”

James gaped at Peter, not believing that his friend had this much faith in him. Remus is the one
who spoke next, “Which is?”

Peter glanced at Remus briefly before his eyes locked on James’s again, “You feel guilty. It's
consuming you, more than likely. You love every moment you spend with Regulus, but it also
makes you feel tremendous guilt, you lie about your guilt to yourself which is extremely unhealthy.
You love Sirius and you love Regulus, it feels like you have to choose between them, but you don't
want to. So you are choosing to lie to both of them, which is fucking with your psyche.”

“Merlin Peter, maybe you should go into psychology.” That was all James could manage to get out
because Peter was spot on.

James looked up at his two best friends and he felt a little lost, “I'm sorry, it's not fair of me to act
this way. I need to get rid of this guilt, I need to talk to Reg. I need him to let us come clean.”

Remus nodded, in complete agreement, but Peter looked unsure. James gave them a half-hearted
smile, “I'll do it, I'll make him understand. I just have to hope that this conversation with Sirius
doesn't scare him off from telling people.”

“He will be fine. I'm sure they'll just discuss what happened. Maybe if they can reconcile, Regulus
would be more likely to want to come out, at least to Sirius.”

James looked at Peter hopefully, then moved his eyes to Remus to see if he believed what Peter
was saying. Given the doubtful expression on his face, it seemed that he did not.

James knew his face sunk with Remus’ expression of uncertainty. Remus tried his hand at being
optimistic, but it really was not his strong suit, “You never know, maybe they will?” He coughed,
obviously feeling awkward, “James, you never told us if Regulus explained what happened?”

“No, he didn't explain.”

Peter furrowed his eyebrow, finally moving away from the window to sit next to James, “Then
how did you know about it?”

James scratched the back of his neck, “Well I was sort of there when it all happened. Not the actual
decision I guess but I knew he was deciding whether he wanted to press charges or not.”

“Merlin James! Exactly how long have you known?”

James wasn't even sure who had asked that, but it didn't really matter because either way they were
both going to hear his answer, “It happened on Christmas Eve. I had begged Regulus not to go
home, but he insisted that he needed to be home during break. Merlin, I wish he would've listened
to me. I don't really know all the details, like I said Regulus didn't say much about it, but I guess he
didn't even see his parents until Christmas Eve dinner.” He took a deep breath, this was painful for
him to talk about, he couldn't imagine how bad it was for Regulus to live through it, “They tortured
him. They had found out about his friendship with a half-blood and they punished him for it. His
house-elf brought him back to school and Mcgonagall came looking for Sirius. You guys had left
that afternoon but my parents weren't expecting me until the next day. She told me to come with
her and when I got there I was paralyzed with fear.”

Peter wrapped an arm around him and it was only then that he realized his voice was coming out
shaky and he had tears running down his face. Merlin, he hadn't let himself think about that night
until now. He had been so scared and if he was honest he still was. That night had affected Regulus
in ways that James couldn't understand and he was still terrified of what it did to his Bunny.

“He looked like he was dead. He was so pale, hell he was fucking catatonic. When he woke, he
didn't seem to understand how he had gotten there. We spent Christmas together, resting. He tried
to convince me to go home and leave him at school but I refused. So instead I took him home with
me for the rest of the break.”

Remus’s eyes flicked briefly from sadness to shock, “He met Effie and Monty?”

James nodded and Peter rubbed his back soothingly, “That must have been really scary for you
both. I'm sorry that you had to go through this without our support but you have it now.”

James shrugged and his voice sounded weak, “It was scary for Regulus and I have spent every day
since break wishing that I could have convinced him not to go home for the holidays.”
“It was scary for both of you and I wish neither of you had to deal with it at all, but at least at the
end of it Regulus made the decision to leave, right?” Remus asked.

James didn't see it coming when the sob reached his lips. He had thought that his tears had begun
drying, but even trying to think about the situation positively hurt him, especially after what he had
watched this afternoon. Nothing about this situation was okay and nothing positive could come
from it.

Suddenly Remus was on his other side and his two friends were embracing him as he cried. He
cried about the fight and about the look he had seen in Regulus’s eyes. He cried from the memory
of Regulus’ catatonic state on Christmas Eve. He cried about the look on Sirius’s face when he
told James that his brother was just like their mother. He cried about his friend's mistrust of him
and how he wholeheartedly deserved it. He cried about any and everything that kept him awake at
night.

Once the tears had finally dried the three boys sat in silence, they were no longer embracing.
However, they were sprawled out on Peter’s bed together, which was a feat for three sixteen-year-
old boys. They lay there for a long time, not saying anything. James wasn't sure how long it had
been, but when Sirius came storming back in he knew that it had been long enough for them to
have their conversation and enough time for it to go terribly wrong.

“He's such a fucking wanker, I swear I don't know how we are related!”

James sighed.

**************************************************************

Sirius

Sirius wasn't actually sure where he was going. He knew that he needed to talk to Regulus, but he
had no idea where to find his brother. If he hadn't been so hasty in his departure from the dorm, he
would have grabbed the map on his way out the door but instead, he had stormed out of the room
as soon as he had heard the news.

The news? Is that what one would call what he had just been informed of? That his little brother
had not only left Grimmauld Place but was pressing charges against their parents for what they had
done to them. Sirius wasn't even sure that Regulus had ever received as much abuse as he did, but
he certainly was neglected. Which was precisely why, as James so eloquently put it, Sirius had to
raise him.

That had surprised Sirius sufficiently. He had never once considered that he had raised and taught
Regulus more than their parents ever had. It also was a bit shocking to hear James of all people say
it. James doesn't seem to dislike Regulus but Sirius knew that was probably mostly for his benefit.
Either way, Regulus and James would have to get used to each other if Regulus was coming to live
with them, which of course he was.

Sirius wondered what could have happened that had led to Regulus making this decision. The last
time Sirius had even mentioned the idea of Regulus moving out, Regulus had reacted very badly.
Now though, he seemed to have jumped in with both feet first. It wasn't a particularly Regulus
thing to do. Usually, he was so calculating and discerning with his actions.

Then again when was the last time Sirius had a real conversation with his younger brother. One
that didn't start and end with anger and taunts, but that all changes today. Today was the day that
Sirius and Regulus Black talked about everything.

If Sirius actually ever found his little brother, which was proving to be a lot harder than he thought.
When he first stormed out of his dorm he had assumed he would be heading straight to Regulus,
but that had not happened. Instead, he had been wandering aimlessly for almost an hour trying to
figure out where his brother would go after making an enemy of half his house.

He figured Regulus wouldn't want to spend a lot of time in Slytherin, considering that his friend
and he had just put two fellow housemates into the hospital wing. Slytherin was bound to be a
hostile place for his baby brother tonight, and Crouch but Sirius couldn't give a shit less about that
psycho.

He had already checked the library, the Great Hall, the potions classroom, and countless other
places. The place he found him was the last place he had expected. He found Regulus sitting on the
ground under the portrait of Barnabus the Barmy, right across from what Sirius knew to be the
hidden entrance to the Room of Requirement. Of course, Regulus didn't know that or he wouldn’t
be staring at the blank wall across from him rather than in the room that could give him anything
he wanted.

Regulus didn't look at Sirius as he slid down the wall next to him, but he groaned at the sound of
him. Sirius looked at his baby brother and he could hardly believe that he had been in a brutal fight
just a few hours prior. His skin was unmarred and Sirius knew Regulus had been punched hard by
Avery. His fists weren't bruised or broken.
“You look pretty good for someone who was just in a fight.” Sirius was surprised by the
hoarseness of his voice.

Regulus snorted, much to Sirius’ surprise, “Yeah well it pays to have a best friend who doesn't like
to see me bruised.”

“Crouch, you mean?”

“Obviously.” Regulus leveled him with an annoyed glare and as crazy as it sounded, Sirius sort of
relished in his brothers' perpetually exasperated tone. It had been so long since they had even
spoken to each other.

“Huh, I didn't realize that Crouch had a caring bone in his body. I figured he would prefer to cause
bruises rather than heal them.”

“Oh, he would, just not with me,” Regulus stated in a matter-of-fact way.

Sirius let out a burst of laughter, Regulus really did have a shotty moral compass, “So you going to
tell me what that was all about this afternoon?”

Regulus turned his head and gave him an disbelieving stare, “Why would I? We don't talk in case
you don't remember.”

Sirius couldn't help but roll his eyes because of course Regulus couldn't just make this easy, “No I
suppose we don't, but we could.”

“No, we really couldn't.”

Sirius tried a different approach, “Look I guess I was just curious why I had to watch my brother
get in a brawl with people I thought were his friends.”

Regulus scoffed but continued to stare at the wall not meeting Sirius's eyes, “You must think pretty
low of me if you think those arseholes are my friends.”
Sirius wasn't sure what to say to that, because he truly had thought they were his friends or at least
friendly. Though the more he thought about it the more he realized that the only time he ever saw
them with his brother was at quidditch-related things. In fact, the only people his baby brother
seemed to spend time with was that psycho Crouch, the coward Rosier, and now Remy Crest.

“So what about Rosier then?”

Regulus made a disgruntled noise, which tipped off Sirius to his brothers' annoyance, either with
Sirius bringing up their relationship or their relationship in general. “Evan and I are not friends
anymore.” He stated this firmly, as if he was challenging Sirius to argue with him.

Sirius didn't, though he was a bit confused by the statement. As far as he knew Rosier and Reg had
been as thick as thieves for years and he hadn’t noticed that changing throughout the year. He
knew for a fact that he saw them together at the Halloween feast.

He wasn't exactly upset about his brother trading out Rosier for Remy, but it was odd that Sirius
hadn’t noticed the change. To be fair he had been so involved in his and Moony's relationship that
he probably hadn't been paying much attention to his brother.

“That's probably for the best.”

For the first time in five years, Regulus agreed with him. Like he actually nodded and said,
“Definitely.”

Sirius nearly keeled over from the shock, “But Crouch is still your friend? After what he did to
Mulciber and Avery? I know their assholes and they probably deserved it but still, you have to
admit that going after someone who had already been injured is a low blow.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “They had already been discharged, they were hardly injured. Besides, it's
not my concern what he does in his free time. I am not his keeper.”

“Maybe you should be if he's going around and picking fights like that.”

Snorting in mock amusement Regulus replied, “Yeah I'll be sure to pitch that to him and see if he
goes for it. I'm sure he will be thrilled with the idea.”

Sirius groaned in frustration at his brothers' constant sarcasm, “Look I just don't think it was a very
honorable thing to do, that's all.”

“Honorable? Merlin, I don't think anyone would ever describe Barty that way. Besides, he was just
defending me, I can hardly be upset with him for that, can I?”

“Defending you? What are you a damsel in distress?”

Regulus didn't say anything, but he did roll his eyes once again.

“Besides from what I've seen, you are plenty capable of defending yourself. And if you and Crouch
consider hospitalizing two people for the night, defense, then I would hate to see what happens
when he instigates a fight.”

Regulus didn't respond so it appeared he was not in the mood to discuss that part of the fight so
Sirius redirected, “I know you've been pretty occupied since this afternoon, with your staring at a
wall and what not, but I figured with your superior breeding you would've came and thanked James
and me already.”

That got Regulus’ attention, he whipped his head to the side and his eyes were wide as they met
Sirius’s, “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I'm talking about how James and I stepped in and saved your ass from having to fight two more
dipshits. So you're welcome.”

Regulus’s shoulders relaxed a bit but he still seemed annoyed, “I will not thank you, I never asked
you to do that. I did not need your help and I certainly didn't need Potter’s help.”

Sirius didn't like how his teeth gritted when he said Potter, as if it was a struggle to even say his
name. Maybe James didn't hate Regulus, but Regulus certainly hated him. There was no valid
reason for his brother to dislike James, but Regulus could find a reason to be mad in heaven if he
wanted to.
“You don't have to say his name like that. He did you a favor today without me even asking him,
the least you could do is be grateful for him if you can't be for me.”

Regulus’s eyes burned in anger and he spits out, “Oh trust me, I am.”

Merlin, why could Regulus not be straightforward for once in his life? Why couldn't he just say
what he meant instead of being cruel and mocking? “ Whatever, Reg. Just maybe try to consider
someone else once in a while and thank James for the next time you talk to him.”

“And why exactly would I be talking to James Potter anytime soon?”

And now for the main reason Sirius was here, “Well you'll probably have to talk to him when you
come to stay with the Potters this summer.”

Regulus gaped at him, his mouth hanging open like a fish going for bait, “What?”

And of course, Sirius responded to his shock with a monologue, “Listen I know you don't like
James, but really he's a great guy and you'll get over your issues with him soon. And Effie and
Monty are the best, the complete opposite of our parents really. They've got this great house in the
countryside and a huge area for us to play quidditch. Plus Monty has a great library, or at least
that's what Moony tells me and I know you like that stuff. Monty is a great cook too, even better
than Kreacher I swear. And I know you love that old coot but the Potter’s house-elf, Dorry, is so
much more pleasant than him. And you can have your own room, I know the Potters would give
you the one Peter stays in when he visits but if they don't then you can have mine and I'll stay with
James. Of course, I'll have to check with James first but I know he and his parents will let you stay
an–”

“Sirius!” Regulus growled looking extremely put out, “What the hell are you talking about?”

Sirius was dumbfounded. What did Regulus mean? Had Peter’s information been wrong? Had he
not left his parents? That thought caused his stomach to go queasy.

“I– I am talking about where you're going to live this summer since you aren't going back to
Grimmauld.”

Regulus looked a bit surprised, which Sirius thought was an odd reaction considering he had just
been ranting about the Potter's house and how he was going to live there. He seemed to calm
rapidly as he asked, “How did you find out?”

Sirius let out a sigh of relief that he hadn't realized he had been holding, “Pete just told me after he
found out that was what the fight was about.”

Sirius swore he almost saw the ghost of a smile on Regulus’s face, “Pettigrew that gossip king, I
should've known.”

Sirius furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “How do you know that he likes to gossip? I hadn't
realized you knew much about my friends.”

Regulus froze for a split second before scoffing, “Everyone knows that about Pettigrew and I don't
know much about your friends other than the fact that they're bloody idiots.”

“Hey now, is that any way to talk about the people, you'll be spending your summer with?”

Regulus groaned, “Listen I don't know where you got this idea but I am not staying with the Potters
this summer.”

“But Peter was right? You left Grimmauld Place?”

Regulus sighed before turning back to the wall to stare into the abyss, “Yes, your little informer is
right.”

“Then where will you stay?”

“I have written to uncle Alphard and requested his assistance. He has assured me that our mother
and father will know nothing about my coming to live with him.”

Sirius was dumbfounded. His brother had left Grimmauld Place but unlike Sirius, he had gotten his
shit together and made a plan quickly. He had been organized enough to press charges, get a place
to live lined up, and request secrecy from his uncle who without a doubt was the best family
member Regulus could have chosen to ally himself with. If anyone was going to protect Regulus
and make sure he was cared for and away from Walpurga it was her younger brother Alphard.

It was a simply ingenious idea and Sirius found himself doing something he hadn't done in years.
He was admiring the intelligence and cunning of his little brother. Merlin, he realized that Regulus
hadn't got thicker as he got older, he was just as smart as he was as a kid if not more, but Sirius had
stopped listening to him as they grew up.

“Shit, Reggie.“ He tried not to react to Regulus’ flinch at the nickname, “That's actually a really
good plan. I guess I just figured that if you left, it was like when I left and you'd be too panicked to
make a plan, like I was.”

Regulus leveled him with a superior stare, “I did leave in a similar state to what you did I suppose,
but unlike you, I don't let self-pity distract me from survival.”

No, of course, he didn't. Regulus was still just as egotistical as he was when they were kids, at least
with his brain. He knew that he was intelligent and he would never waste an opportunity to rub it in
Sirius's face.

Sirius was about halfway through an eye roll when it dawned on him what Regulus had just said,
“Wait, what do you mean you left in a similar state as me?”

Regulus’s eyes flashed with emotion that Sirius couldn't recognize but he quickly covered it with a
mocking tone, “Oh pardon me I forgot you barely understand basic English–”

Sirius growled, “Don't change the subject! What the hell did you mean? How did you leave?”

“Fuck off.”

“Regulus.” Something in his tone must have warned Regulus not to argue because he leaned his
face in his hands.

“I mean that I didn't just decide to leave, she forced my hand.” His voice no longer sounded snarky
and superior, instead, it was soft and fragile.
She forced his hand, that could mean a million different things. But his brother had already stated
that he had left Grimmauld in a similar state to what Sirius had left. Sirius had been broken and
injured when he escaped through the floo that night. He hated the idea of Regulus leaving in a
similar state but he had admired his brother for having the courage to legally escape his family
instead of running away as he had done. Maybe Regulus wasn't the coward of the family, after all,
maybe it was him.

Sirius knew that Regulus would react badly to anything resembling pity and he did not want this
conversation to go bad that quick. So he didn't reach out a comforting hand to his brother, no
matter how much he wanted to. He didn't apologize and tell his baby brother how much he wishes
they grew up in a different house. He didn't even push for further details even though he
desperately wanted to know how hurt Regulus was. Instead in the most steady voice, he could
muster, he asked, “Are you okay?”

Regulus looked up at him, his face surprised but mistrusting, “Of course I am. I am not a baby
Sir–”

Sirius interrupted his brother's obvious cover, “Regulus, for once can you just let me be your big
brother? Can you just let me make sure you're okay without biting my head off?”

Regulus froze for a moment before he let out a loud cruel laugh, standing up and turning to stare
down at Sirius. Suddenly Sirius felt as if he had fallen into a trap, feeling uncomfortable with the
way Regulus glared down at him. “It's funny. It's funny how you can wish for a thing for so many
years, and I mean pine for it, like you wish for it on every loose eyelash, every birthday candle,
and every shooting star, and then when it happens you find out it is the last thing you want. All I
have wanted since I was eleven years old was to hear my big brother say that he wanted to be my
brother and now that it's happened it feels fucking empty.”

“Regu–”

“No I mean really, all those years of wanting something and for it to take something like this for it
to happen.” He was still laughing and Sirius felt a shiver go up his spine of the coolness of it all.
“All it took was my life falling to pieces for my brother to finally want me back in his life. My life
is a fucking mess and suddenly he wants to be there for me to put me back on the right track. Only
my question is where the hell was he when my life was falling apart? Where was he when I lost
weight and sleep, studying at all hours of the day to please our parents? Where was he when I
broke my wrist four times trying to perfect the Wronski Feint? Where was he when some crazy
guy tried to choke me and threatened to kill me if I told anyone his boyfriend's secret?”

Sirius had managed to keep his expression relatively steady throughout his brother's entire speech,
even though it hurt him beyond belief, until the moment Regulus mentioned what had taken place
earlier that year. Sirius had been plagued by that moment ever since it happened, he had never felt
so ashamed as he had at that moment. That wasn't the only time he had let the notorious Black
temper get the best of him, but it had been one of the worst. He had tried his hardest to forget about
the betrayed and frightened face Regulus had given him all those months ago, but now they were
flashing before him.

Regulus's voice had turned to mocking, “Oh that's right! He was the one pressing his hand against
my throat till I couldn't breathe.”

Sirius looked down in shame, before looking up with pleading eyes, “I am so sorry about that
Regulus. I should've said it earlier, but I am sorry.”

Regulus pretended not to hear that as he leaned down staring into his eyes, “Admit it, Sirius, you
only want to be my brother if I am following your plan in life. Otherwise, you couldn't care less
what happens to me.”

Sirius had enough, as he sprang to his feet, “That is not true! I love you, you fucking idiot. You
have always been important to me, but do you know how hard it is to love someone who is
determined to do the exact opposite of everything you believe in?”

“That's bullshit.”

“No, it really isn't, because whether you remember it or not, I tried. I tried for years to get you to
realize how terrible our mother and father were, but you were so determined to impress them, that
you would constantly put yourself at risk. Don't you remember that time you promised father you
would learn that Rivious curse? You were thirteen and you misfired, you had to spend the night in
the hospital. Or the time you were convinced that mother would love you if you could ride a
broom at six years old and you nearly broke your neck, only to be told that there was nothing
impressive about riding a broom. You were always trying to get their attention while all I wanted
was their attention off me for five minutes. It was difficult for us to do anything when our
motivations were so out of line, especially as you got older and began taking everything they said
to you as gospel.”

Regulus’s expression was thunderous, “Did you ever think that the reason I was so desperate for
attention was that I never had their attention for more than a disapproving look? Mother never
even held me as a child, I don't think I even felt her touch till I was four and even then it was a
smack to the face because I broke an antique vase. Father didn't talk to me until I was five and you
were always off with him. I was so terrified that one day you would ignore me the way they did
and then who would I have. Kreacher probably, but otherwise no one. So don't you dare tell me
how hard it was for you growing up with me.”
“Look I'm sorry that they ignored you, they honestly could go down as some of the worst parents
in history, but it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows to have their attention either. I'm the one that
took most of my mother's punishments and father's lectures, not you. So count yourself lucky you
didn't have to deal with that.”

“Count myself lucky? I know you prefer to block out everything that doesn't pertain directly to
you, but I still received plenty of punishment when we were kids. And all of the punishments when
you left. Not to mention you received so many punishments because you were always acting up.”

“Oh and I'm sure there were a lot of punishments for mommy's perfect boy. I took every
punishment I could for you when we were kids and you know that.”

“And you never let me forget it! How could I forget that I am forever in your debt for covering for
me so many times when we were kids? Except the thing is, I never asked you to cover for me and I
certainly didn't ask for you to throw it back in my face so much.”

“Oh, I'm sorry for saving you from getting the shit beat out of you so many times, my bad!”

Regulus threw his hands up, “See that is exactly what I am talking about! Most people don't feel
the need to be constantly thanked and praised for something they did years ago. Hmm, I wonder if
Lupin knows about your apparent praise kink.”

“Fuck off, Regulus. It wasn't just a one-time thing. Don't you remember when you snuck into
father's office to read one of his books, even though I told you not to ever go in there? And then
you were caught and mother shaved my head and made me sleep on nettles for a week, because of
you. My childhood was constantly filled with trying to keep your ass out of trouble, by putting
myself in more trouble constantly.”

Regulus’s eyes burned with indignation, “Don't you dare put that on me. Do not dare put
everything that happened in that house on me. That is not fair!”

Now it was Sirius's turn to cross his arms and look superior, “Oh, and it's fair for you to put their
inability to pay attention to their son on me. It's fair to say that I am the root of all the problems you
had in that house.”

“That is not what I sai–”

“It basically is–”

“No, it's not, you lit–”

“Do not call me a li–”

“Stop interu–”

“I'll interrupt you if–”

“Assez!”

This caused Sirius to stop in his tracks. He hadn’t heard that word in that tone since their mother
used to catch them fighting as children. In fact, he had hardly even heard any French in years,
besides when Remus had asked him about it earlier this year.

Regulus spoke again, in a sickly calm tone, “Je n’ai pas le temps de discuter avec toi et tu n’as
plus la capacité cérébrale de discuter avec moi.”

Sirius stepped forward, getting more into his brother's face than he already was. He dusted off the
French he hadn’t used in years, “Nous n’en avons pas fini avec notre discussion, mon frère.”

Regulus looked into Sirius’s eyes determined and spoke slowly, “Actually we are. This argument
has shown me the truth of our childhood. I believe I would've been better off without you and you
believe you would've been better off without me. So that makes this easy, you no longer have a
brother and neither do I. We can both wash our hands clean of our whole rotten mess of a
childhood.”

Sirius gaped at him, because really how had his brother drawn that conclusion from the discussion
they had, “I don't know what you are talking about but I still have a brother.”

Regulus smirked, “Yeah, James.”

Sirius reached for something, anything that could make Regulus understand, “James could be your
brother too, you know? I mean I know you're going to live with Alphard and that's fine, but you
could still come to visit me. James and you might get along and you could end up being brothers
too. Just give it a chance Reggie, please.”

Regulus dropped his smirk, “James Potter and I will never be like brothers.”

Sirius’s hopeful expression dropped as Regulus began to walk away. He called out once more,
“Reg, please!”

Regulus only paused for a moment, before continuing his walk but not before saying, “Au revoir
frère.”

Sirius didn't stay there long, just long enough for his temper to begin rising again. His brother was
without a doubt the most pig headed and stubborn ass in Scotland. Whatever he didn't need to
rekindle his relationship with Regulus. All that mattered was that Regulus wouldn't be around his
family anymore. He would be safe with uncle Alphard. Safe to be a royal pain in someone else's
ass for a change.

******************************************************************

Regulus

“So are you going to tell me what happened?”

Regulus glanced up from his spot on his favorite couch in the Room of Requirement. He had
circled back about a half-hour after he left Sirius, once he realized he had nowhere else to go. Barty
was in with Slughorn, discussing his punishment for brutalizing injured students. Remy was down
at the greenhouse getting stoned off her ass after what happened this afternoon. He couldn't face
going into the common room quite yet, as that was bound to be a total shitshow. Now that
everyone knew that he was no longer a Black, people would begin taking advantage of that.

They had already begun doing just that when Mulciber and Avery confronted him this afternoon.
They claimed that now that he wasn't really a Black he didn't get to have the privilege of being
protected by a pureblood family. What he did to his first challengers might ward off some people
but others would soon follow and Regulus would be in real trouble then.

When he wandered up to the seventh floor earlier that afternoon, he had intended on seeking refuge
in the Room of Requirement. However, once he was up there he realized there was nothing he
required at the moment. He couldn't make the room appear because he didn't need anything. So
instead he stared at the wall until Sirius came up to find him.

Their discussion had gone as they always went, with vicious words and cutting insults. The two
brothers never did know when enough was enough when to stop twisting the knife. They both just
continued to hurt each other in a pointless attempt to make themselves feel better. Regulus wasn't
sure about Sirius, but it had never worked for him, he always felt worse after saying those things to
his brother.

Luckily once he circled back to the seventh floor he found that he required a safe place where only
James could find him. So he sat on the red couch in front of the fire until James did just that.
Regulus wanted comfort but of course, James questions first, “Are you referring to the fight or to
Sirius?”

Regulus listened as Sirius’s footsteps crept closer until he felt his nounours hand on his shoulder,
“How about we start with Sirius?”

Regulus looked up at James and he knew that he looked vulnerable, “Jamie.”

That was all it took for James to join him on the couch and embrace him tightly. Instantly Regulus
felt himself relax as he was enveloped in the warmth that was James Potter.

James let him sit there in his embrace for a few minutes before asking again, in a soft voice, “So
what happened?”

Regulus’s face was pressed to James’s shoulder so his voice came out muffled, “Like you don't
already know.”

James tightened his hold on Regulus, “I know what Sirius told me, but I would like to hear your
side.”

Regulus lifted his head to James’s eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes, “He came to talk, we fought
like always, I left. There is really not that much to it.”

“Regulus.” Something in the way James whispered his name made him want to spill all his secrets,
which was beyond dangerous. Not that he really had any from James, but still it could be used
against him fairly easily.

He sighed, exhausted from the verbal sparring between his brother and him, “He came to talk to
me about the fight, or maybe it was more about me leaving Grimmauld, I'm not sure. We talked
about the fight first, it was pretty obvious he wasn’t happy about it. He doesn't like Barty at all and
we argued about him a little first. Then he went on some rant about how when I live at the Potter’s
everything will be better, then I told him I wasn't going to be. So th–”

“Wait what?” James interrupted, looking shocked.

Regulus furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, “Which part are you confused by?”

“What do you mean you told him you wouldn't be living with us?”

Understanding bloomed through him, because James had assumed, just like Sirius, that Regulus
would be moving in and playing house with the Potters. Suddenly Regulus had a feeling of regret
for not sharing his decision earlier. He didn't care that Sirius had been shocked by this discovery,
but he did care that James was. He grabbed James’s hand that was tucked around the back of his
neck and kissed his knuckles lightly, “I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, I just didn’t think you
would assume that I would be living with you. I am going to live with my uncle Alphard for the
summer. I have already written to him and he has agreed to keep my living with him a complete
secret. I'll be fine there.”

James gaped at him, “Your uncle Alphard as in your sister's brother?”

Regulus shook his head even though James was right, he didn't like what James was implying, “It's
not like that James. They are not close and never have been. Alphard is more of the black sheep of
the family than anything. He's more like Sirius or Andromeda than anything. He seems thrilled
with the idea of keeping this from my mother, I promise.”

James did not look happy at all, his teeth gritted, “So he's just overjoyed with the challenge of
hiding you from his big sister, huh? It's just like a bigger game of the hide and seek they probably
played as children. Except what are the consequences if he loses? Putting you back into the hands
of that monster. This isn't a game and I don't like the idea of someone being around you that
doesn't take your well being seriously.”

Now it was Regulus’s turn to gape at James, that had not been what he meant at all, “No James, I
just worded it wrong. He doesn't think it's a game, he just was happy to help. I promise that
nothing will happen to me under my uncle's care.”

James let out a bark of humorless laughter, “You mean like when you promised me you would
come home safe at Christmas?”

Regulus felt as if he had been slapped, he slowly extracted himself from James. Climbing off the
boy's lap and standing before him blankly, “I am sorry if this feels like that time did, but my uncle
is different. He cares about me, don't you trust me?”

James stood up, his hazel eyes crashing into Regulus’s own gray eyes, looking determined, “I trust
you Reg.” Regulus let out a sigh of relief that he hadn’t realized he had been holding, “I trust you
with nearly anything. I trust you with my own life, but I can’t trust you to make your well-being a
top priority. I can not trust you to put yourself in a safe situation, but I wish I could.”

Regulus gasped at the sudden turn of James’s tone. James had said he trusted Regulus and for a
moment it had felt like bliss to be trusted by James Potter. Then the boy had ripped that bliss away,
“That is not fair, James!”

“Isn't it? I mean it seems like every time I turn around this year, you are getting yourself in some
kind of trouble.”

Regulus felt unsure of what to say, because James wasn't wrong. He had been getting into trouble
this year with injuries, fights, illness, you name it. He settled with a pleading look that always
managed to get James to agree with him and a soft-spoken, “James?”

James’s eyes softened for a minute before they hardened again, “Do not try that puppy dog look
with me, it's not going to work this time. I am serious Regulus, it's not safe for you to live with your
uncle Alphard.”

Regulus pouted, it was pretty unusual the look didn't affect James, but it had happened before and
he'd have to adjust his plan. If there was one person James would trust it would be Sirius, “But
Sirius even agreed that it was a good idea for me to live with Alphard.”
James looked slightly conflicted at the news, but shook his anyway, “Well Sirius is mistaken.”

Regulus’s eyes and resolve hardened, he crossed his arms, “Well it's not your decision.”

James stepped closer, placing his hand on Regulus’s cheek. It took everything for him not to melt
under that soft touch, “Reggie, I just want you to be safe. The safest place for you is with me.”

Regulus begrudgingly took a step back, “I am going to live with Alphard, James. But I will write
and floo you constantly if that helps.”

James did not look happy with the compromise, so Regulus figured it did not in fact help, “I guess
we are just going to have to agree to disagree on this one.”

“I guess so.”

They stared at each other for a few minutes before Regulus decided to continue answering James’s
question from before the whole living situation debacle, “So then somehow we got on the topic of
our childhood and that did not start or end well. We both essentially said that the other ruined our
childhood.”

James looked slightly taken aback by the change of subject, but then he questioned, “Do you really
think that Sirius ruined your childhood?”

Regulus thought about it a minute before answering, sitting back on the couch and pulling his
knees to his chest, “No. He undoubtedly didn't make things any easier with our parents but no he
didn't ruin my childhood. Our parents did, Sirius was probably the only thing that kept me sane all
those years.”

James nodded, sitting back on the couch at a distance, “I think he feels the same way. So if you
don't really think that, then why did you say it?”

“James, I know you fancy Sirius as your brother. So let me ask you, do you ever say things to him
that you know will purposely hurt him even though you know that they aren't true?”
James shook his head immediately, “No, of course not.”

Regulus gave him a slight smile, “See that's how you know that you are chosen brothers and not
born brothers.”

James looked confused, “What do you mean?”

“I mean that nobody gets on your nerves faster than your siblings. The tempers rise fast because
you've known each other your whole life. You know each other well enough to straight for their
worst fears and you do it because you shared the same trauma that fucked you up in the first place.
Unfortunately, James, you're never going to really understand what it feels like to fight like that
with Sirius.”

“I don't think I want to know.”

Regulus nodded knowing that James would never want to argue like that with anyone even if he
had a brother or sister. When Regulus said nothing James spoke again, “So why don't you
apologize.”

Regulus let out a humorless snort, “Rule number two about siblings, they never apologize no
matter how out of line they were. At least not with words, but Sirius and I are far beyond pointless
gestures of apologies.”

“I wish you could get along.”

“I know you do.”

James was silent for a moment before he spoke again, his voice hesitant, “I want to be able to tell
him soon, Reg. The guilt of lying to him is eating me up inside.”

Regulus looked at James’ pleading expression and sighed. He had known this was going to happen
sometime, he just hoped James would give him more time, “Listen James, I'm not quite ready, but
what if I promise you we can tell him before the end of term. Is that a good compromise?”
Suddenly James was grinning brightly as Regulus, and he had a hard time not smiling back, “That's
great Reggie! I can definitely work with that, thank you.”

Regulus nodded, “So I suppose that means you'll be wanting to tell your other friends at the same
time?”

James froze.

Regulus looked at him curiously as something resembling guilt spread over his face. James
scratched the back of his neck nervously, “About that, I am so sorry I didn't tell you this earlier. I
swear that I meant to, I was just so terrified that you would break up with me if you knew, but
Remus and Peter already know.”

Regulus gaped at James, “How long?”

James swallowed audibly, “Peter found out near Halloween and Remus found out just before
Christmas.”

“Found out? You didn't tell them?”

James scooted forward, grabbing Regulus’s hand, “No, of course not baby. I would never have
gone behind your back like that. Peter saw us after our first date, I guess. And Remus was before
Christmas sometime, I'm not sure Peter only told me that he knew a couple of weeks ago.”

“They've known for that long?”

James pressed a sweet kiss to Regulus’s palm, “Yes and I am so sorry that I didn't tell you. Are you
horribly mad at me?”

Regulus thought about it, but it didn't take him long to find the answer, “ Actually no, I am not
angry. I mean I am not thrilled that Lupin and Pettigrew know and I am really not thrilled you hid it
for long, but I am not particularly mad about it. It would be pretty hypocritical of me if I was,
considering Barty and Remy know already.”
James nodded, and Regulus could tell that he was holding back a smile as Regulus asked, “Can we
trust them to keep the secret a little longer?”

James nodded vehemently, “Yes absolutely we can. Are you sure you aren't mad?”

“James, I have been in too many fights today to want to pick another one with the man I love.”

Regulus smiled and that was James’ cue to move closer to Regulus on the couch until they were
embraced once more. Regulus was laying on James's shoulder when he broke the peaceful silence
they had been in for a few minutes, “Jamie, did I look crazy today?”

James took a moment before speaking, probably measuring his words carefully, “You looked a tad
unhinged, yes, but I must say homicidal rage suits you.”

Regulus snorted at James’s attempt to make light of the situation, “It was weird, I felt so out of
control once I threw that first punch. The things they were saying scared the shit out of me. They
were calling me a traitor, James. The thing I was taught to despise the most as a child, was what
my peers were calling me. I had never actually been in a fight before today, but it was like
something in my brain flipped on and someone else had a hand on the wheel.”

Regulus couldn't see James’s face, but he was sure the boy was alarmed by Regulus' recount of
today's events, as he was himself. “Do you mean you don't think it was really you who was
fighting them?”

Regulus shook his head, “No it was me, that much was pretty clear, but it didn't seem like I was in
control of the fight, if that makes sense?”

James didn't speak for a long moment before his voice came out shaky as he asked, “Do you think
it had anything to do with what happened on Christmas?”

Regulus had thought about that, it wasn't terribly uncommon for severe cases of Cruciatus to result
in madness or other mental deficiencies. He wasn't really sure if it was really a result of the
Cruciatus curse or if it was a result of the rage he still held in him because of what his mother had
done to him. Was it madness or just anger for a woman he couldn't touch?
 His voice sounded a little floaty when he replied, “I'm not sure yet.”

James leaned down and kissed Regulus on the top of his hair, lingering for a moment before
speaking softly, “Don't worry Reggie, we'll figure it out together.”

And Regulus knew they would.

Chapter End Notes

French Translations:

Assez= Enough

Je n’ai pas le temps de discuter avec toi et tu n’as plus la capacité cérébrale de discuter
avec moi= I don't have time to chat with you and you don't have the brain capacity to
chat with me anymore

Nous n’en avons pas fini avec notre discussion, mon frère= We're not done with our
discussion, brother

Au revoir frère= Goodbye, brother

nounours= Teddy bear

 A rat, a redhead, and a righteous young couple
Chapter Notes

This chapter is going to pop between multiple pov's. The goal was to make this kind of
a fluffy light chapter, but for some reason, I randomly began to add heavy subjects, lol.
Quick warning, porn is a discussion in parts of this chapter. Okay so the next chapter
is going to be much heavier, so get prepared, and I never do this but I am going to give
you a date it will be out by. I am starting my big girl job on August 8th, so I will be
getting this chapter out before then, it will most likely be on the 7th. Hope you enjoy
the chapter!

Regulus

“Okay so dish.”

When Regulus looked up from his potions textbook, he found Remy staring at him with a
mischievous grin on her face. Usually, a mischievous Remy was not a good thing for him.

“What the hell are you talking about, Crest?” Barty took the words right out of his mouth. The
three of them were in Remy’s dorm, and they were supposed to be studying.

The longer Regulus was friends with Remy the more he realized that as intelligent as she was, she
was not a studier. She preferred to read through the textbooks and her notes once and then visit the
greenhouse. Barty was usually pretty hard to get to study too, though not as hard as Evan had been.
They had only a few months before the OWL’s and many fifth years had already begun their
studying.

Remy rolled her eyes at Barty, in a way that made it clear she thought the question was ridiculous,
“James Potter, Reg I wanna hear some details. We've given you plenty of time without asking
questions, so it's time for you to fess up.”

“What? You wanna hear about James? Why?” Regulus was more than a little confused. Remy
hadn’t really mentioned James since she found out about them, apart from a few sly looks
whenever Regulus mentioned that he was meeting him. Barty didn't like to talk about him at all, in
fact, Regulus was pretty sure that he pretended that they weren't dating.
“Obviously, I wanna hear about your first boyfriend, Reg. You've been way too stingy with the
details.”

Barty groaned loudly, “Merlin, do we have to talk about that wanker. I ate lunch a few hours ago
and it's liable to make an appearance if I have to hear about them having sex.”

Remy giggled and Regulus heard himself squeak indignantly, “Excuse me!”

“Don't worry Reg, I'm not asking you to tell me the dirty details, although I wouldn't particularly
mind either.” She winked deviously before continuing, “I'm just looking to hear about when it
happened, how it happened, first date, and first kiss. Just little details so I can still call myself your
best friend.”

Barty scowled, “Well then you are out of luck because I am Regulus’ best friend.”

“Oh really? Then where did James and he have their first kiss?”

Barty looked instantly disgusted at the idea, “Ugh, I do not have to know shit about his boyfriend
to be his best friend.”

“Honestly Barty, I don't even know what your issue with James is anyways. He's a really nice guy
and Regulus loves him, so what exactly is your problem with him?”

Regulus really didn't appreciate his friends talking about him as if he wasn't sitting right here. He
decided to let it slide for the moment as he too wanted to hear Barty's response. Honestly, there
was no good reason for Barty to dislike James so much.

Barty was quiet for a moment before he fixed Remy with a contemplating look, “You really want
to know?”

“That's why I asked, dumbass.”

He rolled his eyes but continued, without looking at Regulus at all, “I don't like James Potter
because he is going to hurt my best friend.”
Regulus felt his heart drop and he stared at Barty open mouthed as his friend continued speaking,
“James Potter is not the type of guy to settle down with someone who has more emotional baggage
as a teenager than most people have in their entire lives. He's the type of guy that experiments with
the pretty but complex sibling of his best friend, he is one that is fun to be with until things start to
get tough. The type of guy that will eventually settle down with a nice sweet girl, that never makes
it difficult to love her. The only time he will think about the boy he used to think he loved is when
he's reminiscing on when he thought that he was gay. And where does that leave the boy who
loved him? Lost, confused, and fucked up beyond repair.”

Regulus suddenly felt like he was falling. Falling into a deep bottomless pit of his own fears. His
stomach dropped more with every foot he fell and his heart felt like it was in his throat. Barty had
just stated his every fear. Every doubt he had whenever James would talk about their future
together. He had always feared that he was just a faze for James, but to hear someone else confirm
his thoughts was terrifying. Maybe he should just cut his luck early an–

“Bullshit. That's the biggest load of bullshit I've ever heard.” Remy's firm tone shook Regulus out
of his own head.

Barty didn't say anything, just stared at her, unblinkingly. Regulus had always found it
disconcerting that he could keep his expression that immobile.

Remy shifted her gaze to Regulus and her expression softened, “Barty doesn't know James at all.
All he knows about James is that he's best friends with your brother and that he had a crush on Lily
Evans for years before you started dating. Reg, you know Barty, what is he the best at?”

Regulus was at a loss for words, still feeling shaken from his friend's words just moments ago, “I
don't know, throwing knives.”

Barty let out a snort of laughter, but Remy just shook her head, “No, he is the best at manipulating
people.”

Regulus Finally found focus as he stared at her, wanting to hear more of her theory. Distantly he
heard Barty arguing, but he was focused on Remy.

“Barty is incredible at manipulating people and even though I doubt there is anyone in the world he
cares about more than you, what he just said was a blatant attempt at manipulating you. The real
reason he doesn't like James is that it hurts him to see you so attached to someone that isn't him.
No, I'm not saying he's in love with you or anything, though that could be true for all I know, you
are his favorite person and he dislikes that James Potter has replaced him in that regard. He took
what little he knew about James and used it to manipulate your biggest fears, hoping that it would
make you pull back from the relationship and that he would be your number one again.”

Regulus didn't understand, but then he also did. He didn't understand how Barty could know
exactly what Regulus feared most in his relationship with James, but Barty knew him better than
anyone else, so of course, he could recognize Regulus’ insecurities. He didn't understand how
Barty could say such terrible things to him but hadn’t he done the same thing to Sirius when he felt
the need to lash out. His friend and he were too much alike for their own good. The biggest thing
Regulus couldn't understand is how Barty thought that James could ever replace him. Regulus
loved James with all his heart, but Barty was his person. He was the one who would go through
hell and back with Regulus and not blink an eye. Barty is the one who would be on Regulus’s side
no matter what side that was. He suddenly felt really ashamed that his friend didn't feel like
Regulus would do the same for him.

There was a long moment of silence where the other two let Regulus digest that information. Barty
had stopped his arguing once Remy had mentioned him being afraid. Regulus knew that Barty was
never very good about confronting his fears. Regulus moved from his position on the bed until he
slid down next to Barty on the floor. Barty glanced at him, his expression one of hesitance, he was
scared Regulus would hate him for what he had done.

Instead, he leaned his head on Barty’s shoulder, “You know you will always be my ride or die,
right? I want to make sure you know that, even if I'm in a relationship. Hell even if I get married,
you'll always be the first person I’ll call when I'm in trouble. I love you, you fucking arsehole.”

Barty made a choked sound in his throat, that sounded so uncharacteristic that Regulus had to
glance at Remy to verify he hadn’t imagined it. By the shocked expression on her face, she had
heard it too. His friend was feeling vulnerable and through one sound, he had let them know about
it. Barty Crouch never showed vulnerability. ”But if you ever try to manipulate me using my fears
again, I’ll fucking slit your throat.”

Barty let out a laugh and soon he and Regulus were both laughing heartedly, The heaviness in the
room dissipated as quickly as it had come. Remy giggled a little as well, “Merlin, you two are so
fucked up.”

Regulus couldn't help but agree, then again he wouldn't have it any other way. Remy moved from
her roommate's bed to sit on the floor across from them, “Alright now that's been taken care of and
everyone's feelings have been validated.” She pointedly ignored Bartys groan at the idea that he
had feelings that needed to be validated, “Dish, Reg.”
Regulus sighed heavily, of course, Remy wouldn't let this go, “You really aren't going to drop this
are you?”

“No, I wanna hear details.”

Regulus was feeling much more relaxed now that he had discovered the reason for his friend's
issue with his boyfriend. Even though he wasn't happy with how Barty had handled it, it felt like
they could now sort of move past the, don't ask, don't tell policy, they had been following the last
few months.

“Okay, what do you want to know?”

Barty was suspiciously quiet and Regulus had a feeling, that his friend felt like he was on thin ice
so he wasn't going to make nasty comments for the time being. Regulus was sort of glad for that,
considering he was going to feel weird enough sharing details about him and James with them
anyways.

Remy thought for a moment before decisively saying, “When did it start and how?”

Regulus felt his lips quirking up a bit and he was sure if Barty was a little more comfortable he
would've commented on it, “Uh well if you guys remember the first quidditch game of the year,
between Slytherin and Gryffindor. James had bumped into me and inadvertently lost us the game. I
had been fuming so I stormed into the Gryffindor locker rooms once everyone was gone. And then
I found James there and he was just wearing a towel around his waist, he had just gotten out of the
shower–”

“Merlin, it sounds like the start of a porno.”

Regulus tilted his head to Barty in confusion, “What's a porno?”

Barty snorted and Remy rolled her eyes, “It's a muggle thing Reg, don't worry about it. Why don't
you continue?”

Regulus nodded at Remy, still curious what a porno was, “So I came in and we started arguing
immediately about the game. We had actually argued a few days prior to the game on our prefect
rounds, so it was kind of a continuation of that. The next thing I know James has me shoved
against the lockers and were are looking in each other's eyes. We were both so angry, but one of us
had to have made the first move, I'm still not sure who it was, but then we were snogging. It uh
escalated pretty quickly from there.”

Barty, who had seemed to forget that he didn't want to hear any details about them, asked, “What
do you mean it escalated? You didn't fuck in the locker room did you?”

Regulus felt his cheeks redden a bit and Remy giggled, “Oh Merlin! You did! I never knew you
were such a slut Reg!”

Regulus glared at his supposed friend, “I am not a slut. And no we didn't have sex in the locker
room, we just messed around a bit. Then again a couple nights later on our prefect rounds and then
after we made that bet. From then on things became pretty regular.” He paused for a moment
thinking about whether that was slutty behavior, “Shit, do you guys think that makes me slutty?”

Regulus had never considered that his weird friends with benefits, minus the friends part, the
beginning of his relationship was a little debauched. At the time all he could think about was James
and how he wanted to feel the same pleasure he had during their first hook-up. Maybe that's exactly
what made his behavior so wanton because he truly had not wanted a relationship with James when
they started hooking up, in fact, it was the last thing he wanted.

Remy and Barty both seemed to think his moral dilemma was amusing as they let out a burst of
laughter. Regulus was forced to pout and endured the laughing until Barty finally took pity on him,
“Oh no a horny teen getting his end away with his attractive quidditch rival. Oh no, this quidditch
rival also happens to be his older brother's best friend, so scandalous! Merlin Regs, you really do
know how to make an inadvertent porn plot line.”He winked at his friend, and Regulus was left
once again wondering what this porn thing was, “No, you aren't a slut because you started a
friends-with-benefits relationship with your boyfriend a few months before you dated him. In fact,
that is practically how most relationships start.”

Regulus didn't really appreciate the mocking tone Barty took with him, but he was glad that his
friends didn't think he was slutty. He was willing to be a lot of things, but he didn't want to be
considered loose. He still didn't understand what the hell this porn thing Barty was talking about
was, but he had already asked once and it would be embarrassing to repeat the question.

“Alright, so then when did you first, you know?”

Barty squealed at Remy, “What? I thought you weren't going to ask stuff like that!”
Remy smirked, Yeah but that was before he talked about his hookups with us and now I'm
curious.”

Regulus scratched the back of his head awkwardly, his face ringing, “Uh it was a while before
Halloween and we went on our first date shortly after that. James asked me out after we had, you
know.”

Remy squealed with excitement, it seemed she was enjoying the details, “That's so cute!”

Barty rolled his eyes, clearly judging Regulus, “Yeah totally adorable.”

Remy kicked him lightly in the knee before encouraging Regulus to continue, “So, was it good?”

Regulus ignored the disgusted sound Barty made and flushed red, “Uh yeah it was, it was really
fucking good.”

Barty instantly began to make gagging noises, that Regulus couldn't help but laugh at, as Remy
giggled uncontrollably, “Reg, I am so happy for you! You actually found a man that pleases you in
the bedroom and you enjoy spending time with, that's the dream.”

Regulus couldn't help the smile blooming on his face, because yeah he really had hit the jackpot
with Jamie. Even the thought of James made his heart palpitate. He looked up at Barty, with a
sinister smirk as he added, “You think that's a dream, let me tell you about what he can do with his
tongue.”

Regulus relished in the choking sound his best friend made, served him right for trying to
manipulate him earlier.

***********************************************************

Peter
“Please, Petey! You look so cute when you wear it!”

Peter frowned looking at quite possibly the ugliest sweater he had ever seen, laying on Maggie’s
bed. He refused to bring it into his own dorm, for fear that his friends would find it and ridicule
him mercilessly. The offending sweater was a bright orange number that had various yarn balls
hanging all around it, in what was supposed to be a design. Really it just looked light the creator
had started and stopped the sweater in twelve different spots. The creator being Magdalene's
grandmother Rosalee.

Rosalee was one of the sweetest women Peter had ever met, second only to his own grandmother.
When Peter had spent Christmas with Maggie's family he had been terrified. Her parents were kind,
but her father enjoyed joking with him so much that he never really could tell if he should laugh or
not. When he had first met grandma Rosalee, she had wrapped him up in her frail arms and told
him how thrilled she was to meet him.

He had really enjoyed spending Christmas with his girlfriend's family, even though he did miss his
own. After a wonderful Christmas getting to know Maggie's family, he had been shocked when his
favorite member of her family, besides Magdalene herself, had presented him with this horrendous-
looking sweater. He had put it on for her sake and worn it on boxing day, luckily he wasn't the only
member to receive a sweater so he wasn't as embarrassed.

He was pretty sure Magdalene knew how ugly the sweater was, but she had showered him with
compliments the entire time he wore it anyway. That was all fine and good for the holidays, but
now she was trying to convince him to wear it for the day. Didn't she realize that his friends would
mock him like crazy if he wore it?

“Babe you know how much I love you and I adore your grandmother, but I absolutely can not wear
this out in public.”

She pouted, Peter couldn't help but stare at her pretty plump lips. Merlin, he was dating the most
beautiful woman at Hogwarts. “It's not even that bad, I admit she doesn't have the most amazing
knitting skills, but I still wear the scarf and mittens she made me.”

Peter knew that she wore them, often too. It was pretty cold the night of their first date, he had
taken her to the grounds after curfew to look up at the stars, and she had worn gloves. He had
thought that her family might be on the less-than-privileged side of the wizarding world at the sight
of the holes and loose yarn. He found out later that, no she was about the same economic level as
his own family, she just loved her grandma with all her heart. Just thinking about that made him
reconsider his answer, just for a moment.
“Sweetheart–”

“Peter comes on, grammy wrote me a few days ago and asked why you are never wearing the
sweater in the pictures I send of us.”

Peter groaned because he knew without a doubt that she was about to get her way.

*****************************************************************

“Pete I think your sweater got stuck in the whomping willow, mate!” Sirius laughed, obnoxiously,
at Peter's sweater.

Peter shot him a glare, as his other friends stared unashamedly at his sweater. They were all spread
out in front of the fire in the common room. Remus was sitting on the loveseat in the middle with a
book in one hand, but Sirius had his head in his lap, so he didn't seem like he was going to be
getting much work done anyways. Sirius was smirking at him and Remus was gaping at the
absolute atrociousness of the sweater.

James was sitting sideways in one of the armchairs with a dumbfounded expression on his face.
Dorcas and Marlene who had been practically in each other's laps as they leaned against James’s
armchair on the floor, started laughing. Some fucking friends he had. Mary and Lily weren't there,
so there went Peter's only chance for sympathy.

“Fuck off.” He found himself practically growling, which was not something he was in a habit of
doing. He plopped down on the empty armchair and was surprised when Maggie sat on his lap.
Not that she never did that, but usually she didn't full-on straddle him in front of his friends.

He was taken aback, but in no way was upset when she threw her arms around his shoulders and
leaned in, pressing her lips to him. His hands slid to her hips as she kissed him deeply. He will be
the first to admit that he sort of forgot that they were in front of all their friends. Honestly, who
could blame him when a girl as amazing as Maggie had her tongue in his mouth.

She pulled back slowly before shifting herself in his lap so that she was facing their friends again,
who had a mixture of blatant surprise or awkward attempts to look at anything but the two of them.
She had a wide grin on her face as she said, “I think Peter looks sexy in his sweater.”
Marlene snorted, not even attempting to restrain her sarcastic tone, “No shit.”

Sirius rolled his eyes at the show she had put on in defending her man, but he had a ghost of a
smile on his face, “Yeah we got that. Don't worry, no one else is going to doubt your feelings for
him after that show.”

She smirked at him mischievously and her tone became mocking, “Oh were you looking for a
show, because that could be arranged.”

Peter turned scarlet, and Sirius let out a laugh while sitting up from his reclined position and
sliding on Remus’s lap, “Maybe, but since you've already put on one for us, fair is fair.”

With that he grabbed Remus’s face and leaned in, only to be blocked by Remus’s hand, “No, we
are not about to make out in the common room to satisfy this weird competition you're having with
Magdalene.”

Sirius pouted and Maggie held a superior smirk on her lips, as the others laughed. Sirius turned his
glare to Peter and whined, “Wormy, they're bullying me!”

Peter let out a snort at his friend's pathetic attempt of gaining sympathy, “That’s unfortunate.”

Sirius gasped exaggeratedly, pulling his hand to his chest, “Pete what happened to us? We used to
be so close. It used to be me sitting on your lap and now I've been replaced.”

Everyone laughed at Sirius’ dramatic interpretation of events, but Peter's face reddened. He locked
eyes with Sirius who held a smug look on his face and proceeded to flip off his best friend. Not
even Remus or James knew that Sirius wasn't completely bullshitting. It didn't happen often but
there had been a fair few times over their six years as friends where the two of them had, snuggled.

It's embarrassing to mention, but sometimes the two of them had just felt like they needed comfort
and found each other embracing. There was nothing romantic about it, so he couldn't really
compare it to Maggie sitting in his lap, but Sirius had anyways because he enjoyed seeing Peter
embarrassed.

Luckily he didn't mention it any further and the group turned the conversation to the upcoming
Easter holidays.
“Dorcas is coming to mine for the hols this year! It's gonna be so much fun, my brothers
challenged us to a chasers game. And my mom said she's going to make her mince pies, which she
never does without us begging.” Marlene seemed over the moon at the idea of having Dorcas
spend the holidays with her. Peter thought it was nice to see her so happy, sometimes Marlene got
into her own head too much but Dorcas seemed to help her focus.

“But neither of you are chasers.”James pointed out, one eyebrow raised inquisitively.

Dorcas grinned at James, “Neither are they, the brutal bastards were beaters so it should be a fun
game with this competitive one at my side.”

Marlene looked slightly offended, “I am not that competitive!”

That caused the entire group to burst out in laughs because really she was that competitive. Dorcas
set her hand on Marlene's thigh, “Of course not, honey. So lovebirds number five and six, what are
you guys doing for the holidays?”

Everybody looked around, and Peter was curious too, who the fuck were lovebirds five and six?
James was the one whose curiosity broke first, “Did you rank the couples in this room?”

Marlene grinned at her girlfriend, before winking at James, “Well of course James dear, how else
would we know who the best couple is.”

Maggie snorted, turning her face into Peter's neck as she murmured, “And she says she's not
competitive.”

Peter couldn't help the short burst of laughter that came from him, causing everyone to stare at the
couple on the armchair. Peter waved them off before asking, “So what are your rankings?”

“Well, obviously Marlene and I are number one and two because we are the most attractive
couple.”

Sirius disagreed wholeheartedly, “Oh that is such bullshit! Even forgetting my own pristine beauty,
Remus is the most handsome guy in our entire year. We are easily the most attractive couple.”
Peter and Maggie smirked at each other before leaning back to enjoy the show, neither of them
cared much if they were the most attractive couple.

Marlene scoffed, looking peeved, “Yeah, and? Dorcas and I are attractive too. I was speaking in an
aesthetic way anyways, people tend to find lesbians more attractive than gays. It's in all the
magazines, Black. Look it up.”

Sirius looked flabbergasted as he looked to all his friends for assistance, luckily his best friend
James had his back, “I'd have to disagree there, Marls. Personally, I would much rather watch two
men kiss than two women.”

Peter started coughing, unable to contain his shock at James admitting in front of everyone that he
tended towards homosexual tendencies. Or maybe no one else picked up on that, considering
everyone was looking at him as if he were insane. But really it was no wonder that James preferred
to watch two men kiss, considering he was regularly fucking another man.

Marlene rolled her eyes at Peter's coughing fit, before continuing her argument, “Oh sure James,
your not just saying that because Sirius says so.”

James crossed his arms and huffed, “Hey! I can have my own opinions.”

“Yeah, James can have his own opinions. He is a very opinionated guy.” Sirius came to his rescue,
pretty much proving Marlene's point, that they can't be trusted to have separate ideas.

“Point and counterpoint, so James’ opinion doesn't count since it relates to Sirius. James also
doesn't get ranked, because our dear friend is currently single.” Marlene quickly moved passed the
argument that Dorcas and she were first in the rankings.

Peter finds it sort of amusing, that everyone is convinced James is single when he's been in a
relationship just as long as everyone else in the circle. Granted, he wasn't sure anyone would be
thrilled with his chosen partner if they knew. Marlene fancied Regulus to be her to be quidditch
rival. Dorcas had heard Marlene complain about her quidditch rival enough, to probably never
want to hear his name again. Sirius would probably murder James if he knew that he had been
sneaking around with his brother. Remus, well Remus just hated that Regulus was the reason Sirius
and James had secrets.
Dorcas continued speaking where Marlene left off, “So we thought that our lovebirds' number three
and four, should obviously be the next most attractive couple. And considering Remus’ looks, that
obviously put them next.”

“Hey, I am attractive too!”

Dorcas continued, ignoring Sirius's insistence that his looks be mentioned. Which Peter thought
was a little ridiculous considering that no one needed to mention Sirius' looks, he was obviously
the most conventionally beautiful person in the room and in most rooms. Sirius sometimes could
be a bit of a peacock about his looks, so naturally, no one wanted to add to his already inflated ego.
“And that puts Peter and Magdalene last, not that you two aren't adorable, but honestly hetero
couples are so out.”

Peter and Maggie were not offended in the slightest, in fact, they cracked up when everyone else
did. Peter adored his friends, but even he had to admit they all had inflated egos about certain
things, except Remus who you could hardly manage to convince him that he was good at anything.
Peter had never been like that, he never cared about being the best at things, he just wanted to be a
part of things. It was probably good that Remus and he were there to balance out James and Sirius’
egos.

He was so glad he found Maggie too, she had a similar mindset to his, so it never felt as if they
were competing with each other on anything. It was more like they were a team, which is all Peter
ever really wanted.

***************************************************

Lily

James was on a mission and to complete that mission he need to find the one person who would be
able to help him understand, Lily Evans. James was well aware that Regulus could get a bit jealous
when it came to Lily, even though it was so clear that he was head over heels for his boyfriend. He
hoped that Regulus would understand why he wanted to talk to Lily, if it did get back to him.

Now don't get him wrong, it's not that he never talked to Lily usually, he did. He just usually didn't
seek her out to talk just the two of them, well not anymore anyway. Usually, when he talked to Lily
it was at prefect meetings, classes, or surrounded by all their friends. Maybe when he still was
crushing on her, he would do everything in his power to talk to her alone, but he hadn't done that
since the first time he kissed Reg.
He now completely viewed Lily as a friend, which she seemed glad for. She was much more
friendly to him than she used to be, so he knew she appreciated the space he was giving her. He
was looking for her, only because he was on a mission to understand siblings.

Reggie’s little tirade about siblings and their complex relationships had made James insanely
curious. All he wanted in the world was for Regulus and Sirius to make up, and to make that
happen, he needed to understand siblings. Of course, that was a little difficult to do since he didn't
have a sibling, and the closest thing he had to one couldn't compare, according to Regulus.

Lily would understand, though. She had a sister Petunia that James knew she had very complex
feelings toward. She would be able to explain it to him, so he would understand for his boys. She
could maybe even give advice on the subject, discreetly of course. Yes, it was a very good idea to
talk to Lily about it, he was sure of that.

He found her in the library, big surprise there, hunched over the table with her textbooks spread
throughout the space. He walked over to her quietly, as he slid into the seat across from her. She
startled slightly and looked up, surprised. Her eyes widened and she quickly ran her hand through
her hair, smoothing it. She coughed slightly before speaking in a soft tone, “James, hey what are
you doing here?”

James smiled at her, hoping that she would be willing to help him, “Hey Lily, I'm just here to ask
you something, but I can wait till you are done studying if you would prefer.”

She glanced down at her books, looking a bit taken aback, as if she had forgotten that she had been
studying when he interrupted her. She looked back up at him and smiled, before closing her current
textbook, “No that's okay, I have nearly finished anyway. What's your question?”

She was twirling a strand of her hair with her fingers, a habit that he had noticed she had picked up
in the last few months. He swore he had never seen her do it before this year, but lately, she
seemed to be doing it all the time. Then again they had never been as good of friends as they were
this year, so maybe he just hadn't realized it.

“Okay so this might sound like a weird question, but I was wondering what your relationship with
your sister is like?”

Her mouth dropped slightly in shock, before she recovered with an awkward laugh, “Petunia? Why
do you want to know about that?”
“Well so, I recently was talking to…a friend about their relationship with their sibling. It's rather
complicated and they inferred that I might not be able to understand because I am an only child, so
I naturally thought of you to help me understand.”

She flushed slightly red, though for what reason James didn't know, “Is this about Sirius and
Regulus?”

James's eyes widened and it was his turn to gape at her as she let out a breathless chuckle, “I know
that you think you were being secretive, but it was about as subtle as a freight train. Two siblings,
one of them being your friend, that have a complex relationship, it's not rocket science, James.”

James let out a breath, it was okay that Lily knew who he was talking about, as long as he didn't let
certain details slip out, that would out Reggie and him, “So what do you think?”

She smiled softly, and James could remember a time that a smile from her would've made him
melt, but now he didn't feel anything, “I think that Sirius is probably right. You most likely can't
understand the way siblings work, but that doesn't mean you can't try. Tuney and I are, well it was
easier before magic got in the mix, but then again everything is always more simple as kids. We
used to be really close, like I considered her to be my best friend and I think she felt the same. Then
when we found out I had magic, she started to resent me for it and all I wanted to do was share it
with my big sister. Now it's weird between us because we're still sisters, I love her and I think she
feels the same, but she also resents me. There's this distance between us that I despise, but I am also
through with trying to make myself feel like less just to spend time with her, you know?”

James nodded, he could understand that strange bond, even though he might not ever have it
personally. He could understand the love someone has for a sibling, even though they might not be
the best for them.

Lily continued, “Sirius and Regulus would be a little different to us, because they both have magic,
but I think in a way they are the same.” James tilted his head, a bit confused at the comparison,
“They both resent each other a bit I think. Sirius resents that Regulus didn't drop everything to
leave home with him and Regulus resents that Sirius left him. It's actually very similar to the
resentfulness Petunia and I hold for each other. It shouldn't be important, but when you let those
feelings fester they become something quite toxic.”

“Are you saying that they are toxic for each other?”
She nodded, but then seemed to consider the thought more, “I am tempted to say yes, but in reality,
it's more complicated than that. Tuney and I are not good for each other, but she is my big sister
and I want nothing more than to be in her life. I'm guessing that's what Sirius meant by their
relationship being complicated. No matter what happens, they are always going to be your flesh
and blood, there will always be a part of them with you. Or I guess that's how it feels for me.”

James had never considered that, but really why would he? He had always been the type of person
to understand that when things aren't good for him, he should cut them out of his life. If he wasn't
thinking about a relationship between two people he loved, he would suggest that they cut their
losses and move on, but if Lily was right, that would never really happen. “He also said that
sometimes siblings say terrible things to each other, that they don't mean because they want to hurt
their siblings as much as possible.”

She twisted her lips as she thought, “I think he's right that sometimes all you want to do is cut deep
with your siblings because in the heat of the moment it's hard not to want to see their pain.
However, I disagree that you don't mean it. I think on some level you always mean the things you
say to each other. At least that's how it always is for Tuney and me.”

James grimaced, that's exactly what he had been afraid of, “Thanks Lily, this was really helpful.”

Lily smiled at him, she hesitated before speaking, “James, I have to ask. Why are you so worried
about understanding the Black brother's relationship? Is it just because you're Sirius's friend?”

James thought about what he could say without revealing his relationship with Regulus, “I mean
part of it is me wanting to understand Sirius the best I can and a big part of that is understanding
his relationship with Regulus. But honestly, I would love nothing more than to see two brothers
rekindle their relationship. I want Sirius to be as happy as he was when we were in our first couple
of years when he thinks of his brother. Does that make sense?”

She nodded, a small smile glued to her lips as she stared at him. He stood up from the table,
“Thank you again, Lils. And for what it's worth I am sorry about you and your sister. I hope that
you can make it work eventually.”

With that he turned and left her to continue her studying, feeling much more informed than when
he had entered the library.

**************************************************
 Remus

Remus would never be known as an optimist. No one would ever describe him in any way close to
that. He was a token pessimist and everyone knew that. He was the first person to point out a
problem and he immediately assumed that the worst would happen.

Even though he had pined for Sirius Black for years and even though he was living his dream
every time Sirius kissed him, he always felt like it would go wrong. He always assumed that Sirius
would dump him for someone prettier and nicer, maybe even a girl. Maybe Sirius was finally done
experimenting and he decided the whole gay thing wasn't for him.

Frankly, Remus wasn't exactly the best option Sirus had, in fact not even close, no matter how
many times their friends said otherwise. They were constantly making comments about how
handsome Remus was, and while he knew they were attempting to boost his already low
confidence, it felt like they were mocking him. It felt like they all knew that Sirius was just biding
his time with the lanky, scarred chav.

Now, Sirius had never ever made him feel bad about his less than wealthy parents or his second-
hand clothes, but Remus always thought that it was more of an unspoken understanding. Within
their group Remus was the poor one with terrible speech habits, Peter was the middle-class
sweetheart that everyone adored, James was the wealthy and athletic boy with the heart of gold,
and Sirius was the beautiful and rich one, who had always been slumming it by being friends with
Remus.

Even when it became apparent to Remus that Sirius despised his parents and their ridiculous
pureblood world, it still felt like he was doing Remus a favor by spending time with him. When
they first started dating, Remus genuinely had thought that it was just an experiment between them,
but now that it had been going on for half the year, he could no longer say that.

Sirius was the first one to say I love you. Sirius was the first to ask him on a date. Sirius was the
one who had initiated their first kiss. Sirius was the one that had first straddled him before they had
sex for the first time. Sirius had gushed and bragged for anyone to hear when they asked about his
boyfriend. Sirius had told everyone in the Great Hall that Remus was his boyfriend.

After everything Sirius had done to make clear to Remus how he felt, he found himself still
doubting his boyfriend's feelings. He never really said these doubts to Sirius, for fear that he would
realize that the doubts were true and dump him. No, Remus wouldn't tell Sirius that he was
pessimistic about their chances to make it past graduation. Instead, he would continue to wait until
the other shoe dropped, and he was determined to enjoy it to the best of his ability.
Laying here in the bed they charmed to be big enough for them both, staring at Sirius' beautiful
body as he ran his fingers through his soft black hair while listening to him talk about the future,
was enough for him. It was something Sirius did often, especially in the blissful aftermath of sex,
he would talk about what they would do after they graduated.

“We’ll have a nice little cottage, hopefully near the Potter’s if possible, but it's got to be by a
secluded forest for your change, obviously. We will have a nice garden, just like your mom's, so
we don't have to go into town as often. I'm not sure what we will do for jobs yet, but whatever it is,
it's going to be fun, because fuck a boring desk job. Then again, I know much you like to study so
maybe you'll want one, but either way, we are going to be so happy, Moony.”

Sirius continued to talk about his plans for their future for a long time. Remus listened intently,
smiling at the naivety of his gorgeous boyfriend. They wouldn't be able to afford a cottage without
Sirius inheriting anything unless they got really good jobs straight out of school. Which was going
to be nearly impossible for Remus. Even if he earned all his NEWTs, he would be turned away
frequently and rudely by employers because of his affliction. More likely, the two of them would
be lucky to find an apartment in muggle London for cheap and even then Sirius would probably
have to do most of the support financially. That is if they ever even lived together.

Remus didn't mind letting Sirius live in his fantasy world, because it was so much more pleasant
than reality.

**********************************************************************

James

Beautiful, that is the only way to describe Regulus Arcturus Black. From his soft raven-colored
hair to his flawless skin, his supple lips that looked so swollen from the afternoon of kissing, and
steely grey eyes he found himself constantly getting lost in. James wasn't ashamed to admit that he
was a bit obsessed with his boyfriend. Okay, maybe more than a little.

He only spent ninety percent of his time thinking about Regulus. That was a completely normal
thing for a teenager to do. Regulus was the last thing he thought about as he fell asleep and the first
thing that came to his mind when he woke up. He wished more than anything that he could wake
up with Reggie there beside him. In fact, sometimes he even dreamed about it, while those dreams
were nice, there was nothing more disappointing than waking up in the morning without Regulus
there.

James was constantly enraptured by Regulus’ beauty. He knew Regulus’ beauty well. He had
studied him in those soft moments they spent with each other during the rare mornings they got
alone. He knew about the birthmark on Reggies left thigh and the freckles sprinkled on his smooth
back. He knew that Regulus tended to wrinkle his nose when something grossed him out and he
knew Reggie preferred to smirk rather than smile, though not as much around James. James was
extremely proud of every smile and laugh from Reggie he caused.

There was nothing more beautiful than Regulus’ laugh. It was soft and subtle, but it sounded like
music to James’s ears. It made James’s stomach flutter with excitement and caused him to stop and
listen, no matter what he was doing.

This habit just got him into a bit of trouble, as Regulus sinks his teeth into his arm, causing James
to shriek and jerk back. He had been straddling Reggie, tickling him so he could continue hearing
that beautiful laugh, when he had gotten distracted, ironically by the laugh he had wanted to hear.
It was a vicious cycle. Reggie had taken his distraction and used it against him by biting him hard
on the arm.

When James looked down at his arm he could see the teeth marks imprinted on his arm, Reg must
have bitten him hard. It was his own fault, really, he knew Regulus did not like being tickled, but
when they had started teasing each other in the aftermath of some shared pleasure, he couldn't help
himself.

“Ouch! You are such a brat, Reggie.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, but now that he was no longer being tickled, he didn't seem to be in any
hurry to get James off him, “You're the one who tickled me when you know I hate it. You know
James, you really aren't supposed to pet snakes.”

James grinned down at Reg, dragging his hand down the boy's bare chest, “Oh, and you're a snake,
are you?”

Regulus smirked up at him, his eyes were gleaming, “Isn't that what you call me and the rest of
Slytherin? A bunch of snakes in a snake pit? Does that not still hold true?”

James tweaked Regulus’s nipple as punishment for his smart mouth, causing him to yelp and
squirm. Reggie had very sensitive nipples, and James had wholeheartedly enjoyed taking
advantage of that fact whenever possible, “No Reggie, maybe the rest of them, but you've never
been a snake to me. You're more like my cute little bunny.” James relishes the sight of his
boyfriend's pink cheeks and sheepish smile. “Or my brave little lion, but never a snake.”
Regulus furrows his eyebrows in confusion, “Lion? James, in case you've received too many
bludgers to the head and it escaped your notice, I'm not a Gryffindor.”

James couldn't help but chuckle at Regulus’ perpetual sass, “No, your star Regulus, it's part of the
Leo constellation. Which make you my little lion and you are one the bravest people I've ever met,
too. So no, I didn't receive too many head injuries, it makes perfect logical sense.”

Regulus looks a bit surprised, and he murmurs softly, “That's debatable.” James isn't sure whether
he's talking about the head injuries or the nickname, but Regulus doesn't let him ponder that
thought long as he leaned up on his elbows and pressed his lips to James.

When he pulls back, his voice is soft, “I didn't know you were so into astrology, Jamie.”

James smiled at him, his voice a little breathless from the kiss, “I'm not, but I am very into you.”

Regulus blushed a beautiful shade of red before he shoved James' shoulder, “Fuck off, you
romantic bastard.”

James laughed and leaned down to kiss his beautiful boy once more, letting himself melt into the
kiss. He would never get tired of this feeling, ever.

He was completely taken off guard when he pulled back and heard Reggie ask, “What’s a porno?”

James stared at him, wondering where the fuck that had come from. He leaned away and scratched
the back of his neck awkwardly, “Uh, how'd you even hear about that?”

Regulus narrowed his eyes, “Barty, now answer please.”

Fucking Crouch, why was it always Crouch? He sighed, “It– well, it's this thing muggles have– Uh
like it can be videos, magazines, or photos an–”

“What's a video?”
James rubbed his temple, feeling frustrated that he couldn't explain this properly, “It's sort of like
our pictures, but they can be a lot longer and they have to watch them on television. A television is
something they have for entertainment to watch these videos.” Regulus nodded, signaling that he
understood so far, “Okay so these specific videos are of a more sensitive nature. They are
essentially photos and videos of people in sexual positions.”

Regulus looked up, appalled, “Wait, people watch other people have sex for entertainment?”

James nodded, feeling flushed. Trying not to remember two Christmas's ago when Sirius and he
had snuck into the nearby village and bought a porn video to watch on the muggle tele his mother
had gotten them for Christmas.

“So if we would've been on video, doing what we did a little bit ago, that would've been considered
porn?”

James nodded, wondering where Regulus was going with this, “Oh god, I am not going to be telling
Barty about this.”

James’s eyes widened, “Why would you tell Crouch anything about that?”

He rolled his eyes at James’ defensive tone, “He kept telling me that our--well when we first, uh in
the locker room that first time, that it sounded like a porno. I'm just saying, I'm not about to tell
him that he sort of was right.”

James didn't think he really liked that Regulus told Crouch about their intimate moments, but he
supposed he really shouldn't get too worked up about it. In fact, before Sirius started dating Remus,
he often used to detail his encounters with women to James. It was something guys did with their
friends, but James did wish Regulus had a friend that was less of a creep to share shit with.

James let out a breath and found himself releasing those worries, they didn't matter. He stroked his
hand up Regulus’s chest and caressed his gorgeous face, “Baby, the pornos Crouch is talking about
are sleazy videos people make to earn money. What we do is intimate and beautiful and should
never be compared to that garbage.”

Regulus smiled slightly at that and turned his face into James’ hand, kissing it softly, “I'm glad to
hear that because it means a lot to me.”
“Me too, love.”

Life was good. That's all James could say at the moment, he really had no complaints. Sure the first
couple of weeks after the whole Sirius and Regulus incident were a little rough, to say the least.
Between Sirius’s constant ranting about his ungrateful brat of a brother and Regulus’s insistence
that Sirius was a thoughtless prick, James had his work cut out for him. He tried his hardest to
convince the brothers to talk to each other again, but they still hadn't and it had been two months.

Regulus still occasionally struggled with anger and depression, caused by the scrambling his mind
took at Christmas. He would irrationally lash out at staff, other students, and occasionally James,
but it was usually followed shortly with an apology once he calmed down. Every time he could see
Regulus retreating into his mind, he wanted to kill Walpurga Black all over again for what she had
done.

Sirius, while he was still angry at his brother, no longer ever called Regulus the prodigal son or the
perfect one. It seemed that as much as their discussion had been primarily arguing, he still seemed
to understand that Regulus was just as fucked up as he was from their childhood. James was hoping
that, that understanding could translate into them coexisting, eventually.

Things had calmed down after a couple of weeks and then it had been absolute bliss. Regulus and
he spent as much time together as possible. From their prefect rounds, their late-night rendezvous,
and the occasional date night they managed to sneak out for, they managed it quite often. James
found himself falling even deeper in love with Regulus Black, and he hadn't even thought that was
possible.

James had no complaints in any other part of his life either. Quidditch was going great, they were
poised to be in the championship if they could win their next game against Hufflepuff. James was
really looking forward to winning the house cup his first year as captain. He was actually doing
really well in his classes too, partially thanks to Reggie, who helped him study every week during
tutoring. His friends were great and their pranking was going very well. They had actually begun
pranking random people rather than targeting Slytherins, at James’ request. Whenever they did
plan on pranking Slytherins, James would warn Reggie so he could be prepared.

All in all, for James, life had never been better. He had great friends, a great life, and an amazing
boyfriend that he actually had a future with. James felt completely invincible, like he was on top of
the world. That was until May twenty-first 1975, when everything started to fall apart.
 Family Reunions
Chapter Notes

Alrighty so for this chapter I needed a conversion rate for galleons to muggle money,
but I got many conflicting answers. So I chose the one that made the most sense to me
which put the value of the galleon very high because it always seemed that way in
canon. Also, my conversion rate is in US dollars because that's what I use.

****1 Galleon= 25 dollars****

Also, I made up a lot of rules about legal proceedings in the wizarding world, so
hopefully, they make sense.

Enjoy the chapter!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

May 21st, 1976- Great Hall, 7:25 a.m.

Sirius

The morning was going pretty well, as well as a morning before classes can go. It was a Thursday,
which meant there was quidditch practice tonight, which usually put Sirus in a decent mood. James
had been talking his ear off practically every moment about a new strategy he had for their game
next week. Sirius knew that the next couple of practices were going to be hell. James never just did
anything casually and that included being quidditch captain.

Speaking of Prongs, he was talking nonstop about their upcoming game and Sirus was about one
more strategy proposal away from a headache. Luckily his darling boyfriend managed a subject
change before that headache developed, “Sorry to interrupt your strategy session James, but did
you finish our transfiguration homework yet?”

The homework that was due today, specifically in a half an hour, by the wide-eyed expression on
James’s face he had not finished it. Sirius couldn't help but smirk at his friend's misfortune, right
after he thanked his lucky stars that his boyfriend had forced him to do it the night before. He had
wanted to put it off just like James obviously had, but Moony had told him that there was no
chance he would get lucky last night if his homework wasn't done. It was an odd requirement for a
teenage boy to have to get into his pants, but Remus was a total nerd at heart. And Sirius was so in
love with that school-obsessed dork.
Sirius couldn't help teasing his hopeless friend, “Isn't that the type of thing that you should do in
your tutoring sessions?”

When James had told Sirius that he was being tutored to get ahead of the NEWT’s next year, Sirius
had been surprised. James had always been a pretty good student, aside from the occasional
forgotten assignment. He didn't seem like the type of student that would need tutoring. This is why
Sirius was convinced that the “tutoring sessions” were just another excuse to fool around with his
boyfriend. Sirius had mentioned this theory to Remus and even though his boyfriend had voiced his
doubts on the matter, Sirius could tell that he wassuspicious as well.

James flushed, probably thinking of his “tutoring session” last night, “Yeah well maybe I got
distracted.”

Sirius grinned at Moony, who looked vaguely uncomfortable with the topic. So Remus did think
James was lying about those supposed tutoring sessions, he knew it, “I'm sure you did, Prongsie.
How is Bunny anyways?”

Peter cleared his throat before developing into a coughing fit and Remus suddenly had his hand on
Sirius’s thigh. As distracting as those two things were, his eyes were locked on James, hoping to
guilt his friend into admitting that his tutoring sessions were a farce. James looked uncomfortable,
but he quickly evaded the question by pointing up and shouting, “Oh look mail is here!”

Sirius groaned at his friend's stubbornness. He wasn't even asking James to tell him the identity of
Bunny, he just wanted James to admit that it was Bunny he was meeting for tutoring and they
weren't doing much tutoring. Sirius didn't know when James and he had begun to lie to each other
so much, it was disconcerting. They never used to lie to each other before this year. But with the
secrets of Bunny and Moony, they had had a rough year for honesty between them, Sirius would
like to change that.

Within seconds owls swooped down through the tables delivering letters and packages to students.
Sirius wasn't expecting anything, he only ever got anything if Andromeda or the Potters sent
something to him. Though he had been tempted to exchange letters with his uncle Alphard ever
since hearing about Regulus going to live with him.

Peter usually received goodies from his mom once a week, just because she missed him so much.
Sirius thought it was cute, how much Peter was a mama's boy but he supposed it was
understandable considering it had only been the two of them since his sister moved away. Today
was not a goody delivery day, but Peter did get dropped a letter from his sister, Elizabeth.
Remus’s parents were pretty good about sending their son letters a few times a week, even though
they both were usually pretty busy with work. Hope Lupin was a muggle, she worked in the
muggle village they lived near as a waitress. Lyall Lupin worked in the village as well as a
“handyman”, which apparently meant he fixed broken things for muggles who couldn't do it with a
wand. They didn't have much money to their name, for as hard as they worked, but they were the
nicest people one would ever meet. Unfortunately, their lack of funds probably had to do with their
constant moving to hide the details of their son's affliction.

Remus had been five years old when he was bitten by a werewolf by the name of Fenrir Greyback.
Lyall had told Sirius the story the last time they visited and it had broken his heart. Lyall used to
have a good job in the Ministry, in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical
Creatures. Until the department attempted regulation of werewolves and angered Greyback, he
targeted the Lupin’s on the night of a full moon, he bit a young Remus. Lyall had quit his job and
they had moved to a muggle area and they continued to move whenever someone became
suspicious of their son. They never wanted to settle in a wizarding village because of the stigma
that werewolves got in wizarding society.

Sirius adored Remus and his family, even though he was deeply saddened by all they had gone
through as a family. Today Remus did receive a letter from his parents, delivered by a grey owl that
flew into the plate of toast in front of him. Remus did not look like he appreciated the bird's landing
habits.

James, the master avoider, received a few letters, probably from his parents and other family
members, and a newspaper. Sirius always thought that it was a little silly that James still subscribed
to the Daily Prophet when there were always enough newspapers around to share at breakfast.

Sirius wasn't having any of this avoiding nonsense, he repeated the question as James shifted
through his mail, “James, you never responded. How is Bunny?”

Sirius had been expecting James to change the subject again or at least look panicked, but he hadn’t
expected both. James looked down in terror at the newspaper in front of him, whispering, “Oh no.”

Sirius was a bit surprised by James' sudden laser focus on the news, he had never been that
interested before. He glanced at Remus to see if he thought it was weird, and he found Moony
looking just as confused as he was. It was then that he noticed the stares and whispers all around
him, directed at him. It felt exactly like the time Regulus had been sent to the hospital wing and
everyone had known but him.

Out of paranoia he looked to the Slytherin table, scanning its inhabitants, but found his brother
nowhere. That was when Peter, who must've grabbed the paper from the shellshocked James,
handed it to him, “Sirius, you should probably see this.”
Sirius took the paper from him, rather numbly, before looking down at the front page news. It was
there that he found a large photo of his father. It was an older photo from a Ball years ago, he was
posing stiffly as cameras flashed around him. Sirius couldn't comprehend why his father was on the
front page of the Daily Prophet, that is until he glanced up at the title.

Heir of Black Family: Orion Black, Dead

Sirius stared at the words but he didn't understand. Dead. Orion Black, dead.

The world suddenly became very muted around him. Voices were surrounding him, but it all
sounded muffled and distant.

Orion Black, dead.

His father was dead. The man that he had wished dead for so many years, was actually dead. The
man who had spent his entire childhood training him to be the heir of the Black family, was dead.
The man who stood by and watched as his mother hurt him, with no more than a slight frown, was
dead. The man who never loved him, even for a second, was dead.

Sirius unfolded the front of the newspaper to read the article. He needed to know how it had
happened. Distantly he felt a hand on his shoulder, but he paid it no mind. He scanned the words in
front of him.

Last night

Deatheaters

Auror battalion

Rouge unforgivable
Three injured Aurors

He struggled to absorb the words in the article fully, but certain words stuck out to him. He could
surmise a guess from them on what happened. Last night a group of death eaters, including his
father, and Aurors fought. An unforgivable shot by a death eater missed its target and hit his father.
There were three Aurors injured in the fight and one dead.

It wasn't exactly surprising that his father was in a battle as a death eater and even though no one
would say it out loud, everyone knew he was. If they didn't, this article told them everything that
they needed to know. His father was a despicable villain and he died an unremarkable death. Sirius
had enough clarity to feel remorse for the Aurors who were injured in the battle, possibly by his
father.

He wondered whether his mother was there. She was a death eater, the same as his father, but they
didn't mention whether his wife was with him or not. Probably good for her that they didn't,
because then she would really be under Ministry scrutiny. It was bad enough that her deceased
husband was a follower of Voldemort, but if there was proof that she was too, it would be bad.

Orion Black, dead.

All the whispers and staring he had felt since the moment mail had arrived, was because the Black
family were death eaters, it was practically proven now. It wouldn't matter to anyone that Sirius
and Regulus weren't even on the family tree anymore. They still held the last name. As far as
everyone was concerned, he was the bad guy.

Sirius felt the anger building in him, slowly. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fucking fair that he would be
dragged back under the family name, now, after everything that had happened. He had escaped, his
reputation mostly unharmed, but now his father was a death eater that happened to get himself
killed. They probably all expected him or Regulus to take his place.

Orion Black, dead.

Slowly the volume of the Great Hall increased until it was so loud his ears ached a bit. He could
feel the stares and the pointing. He knew what they were all thinking. He realized that the hand on
his shoulder was Remus’s and Peter was staring at him worriedly from across the table.
Sirius looked at the paper for a minute longer, not wanting to see all the eyes on him. He schooled
his expression to neutral one, the best he could. He was never very good at it, Regulus was always
much better.

He looked over to James, wondering if his friend could tell what he was thinking, like it always
seemed he could. James wasn't looking at him though. James had grabbed a newspaper from
someone near him and was staring at the words in the article, his expression one of terror.

Orion Black, dead.

Sirius didnt heve much time to ponder his friend expression before he heard someone speak to him.

“Mr. Black.”

Sirius looked up from his friend into the usually shrewd, but gentle at the moment eyes of Minerva
McGonagall. She was standing behind Peter, looking down at Sirius. The whispers of the students
around him quieted.

He cleared his throat, but his voice sounded weak, “Yes, professor.”

Her expression was grim, “If you wouldn't mind coming with me. The headmaster would like to
speak to you.”

He didn't say anything as he stood up, slowly. He felt like a ghost as he walked through the tables,
with everyone staring at him. McGonagall didn't say anything, she just guided him up the stairs in
front of a large gargoyle. For as many times as he had been in trouble at Hogwarts, he had only
ever been in the office one time, when the Potters had requested they be contacted if trouble arose
rather than his parents.

“Cockroach clusters.”

Sirius watched as the gargoyle raised and stairs appeared. McGonagall motioned him forward and
numbly he walked up the stairs and entered the office. The moment he entered the office his eyes
zeroed in on his brother sitting in a chair across from Dumbledore's desk. He was staring down at
his hands, not looking at the man behind the desk.
Orion Black, dead.

Dumbledore stood upon seeing him enter, motioning for him to take a seat next to his brother,
“Ahh Sirius thank you for joining us. Please take a seat, Minerva and I would like to discuss
something with you both.”

Hmm, I wonder what that could possibly be.

He sat beside his brother but not before shooting a look to Regulus, noticing his brother had no
interest in anything but his hands at the moment, he looked back up. The headmaster and
McGonagall were looking at them both with grim expressions from behind the desk.

Dumbledore cleared his throat softly. before speaking, “I'm sure you both have already heard this
news, but in case you haven't we feel we should be the ones to talk to you about it. We would've
talked to you sooner but unfortunately, the Prophet was quicker with the details than our sources
were. Regulus, Sirius unfortunately your father passed last night.”

Unsurprisingly neither of the boys broke out in gasps, so McGonagall continued, “We are aware
that neither of you are in a particularly good place with your family at the moment so if you have
any questions, we will answer to the best of our ability.”

There was a long silence before Regulus spoke, his ragged voice shocked Sirius a bit, “How? I
received a death letter in the morning but it didn't say much.”

Sirius whipped his head to his brother, “You got a death letter?”

Regulus slowly turned to him, but it was as if he was looking straight past him for all the emotion
he showed. He reached into the pocket of his trousers and held out a small folded cream-colored
piece of parchment.

Orion Black, dead.

Sirius stared at it, wondering what his father wanted to say in the end. Death letters were something
of a rarity in the wizarding world. People usually didn't make them unless they knew that they
would die soon. A lot of people didn't even bother with them because they didn't feel they would
have anything to say in the end. Though Sirius was sure that with the war currently raging, their
popularity was skyrocketing.

Still, it was odd to imagine his father, stone cold and heartless as he was, sitting at his desk coming
up with his final words, but clearly, he had. He had managed final words and he had decided who
they would be sent to. Sirius wasn't surprised he didn't get a letter but he was surprised that
Regulus did. As far as Sirius knew, his brother was farther on his family's shit list than him, given
that he was throwing his abuse into the spotlight of the wizarding world.

Regulus had received a letter, which meant there was a reason or his father had written it before
Regulus had left the family. Suddenly he was terrified to read the letter, he didn't want to know his
father's last thoughts. He shook his head and Regulus repocketed the letter.

Dumbledore coughed lightly before answering Regulus’s question, “Your father was in a battle last
night with a group of Aurors after a tip-off they received about Voldemort's forces set to attack a
muggle village. Your father was hit by the killing curse after a death eater misfired on the Auror
forces and hit him instead. He was the only person killed in the battle but three Aurors were
injured. As far as we know, he was apparated home by a fellow member shortly after.”

So he had been right in his assumption. Dumbledore might not have said the words but everyone in
this room knew, that Orion Black was a death eater. A death eater who was attacking a village full
of innocent muggles, because his deranged master said so.

Regulus didn't say anything, just nodded that he understood. Sirius had to know something before
the moment had passed, “Was our mother there?”

Regulus looked at him with wide eyes, seeming more aware of the situation, before turning to
Dumbledore intent on hearing the answer for himself.

McGonagall looked uncomfortable, but Dumbledore looked completely at peace as he replied, “We
don't believe so, of course, we can't be certain as all members were wearing masks. We only knew
about your father because his mask fell off after he was hit. However, according to the Aurors that
I have conversed with, the members present all seemed to be male.”

Sirius would bet his ass that the only reason Dumbledore bothered asking about the gender of
those present was because of their cousin Bellatrix. Bellatrix was young, but she had already made
a name for herself and was rumored to be high in the ranks of the death eaters. People feared
Bellatrix, she was mad as a hatter and had the cruelty to ruin lives.

There weren't a whole lot of women death eaters, as far as Sirius knew. Bellatrix and his mother
were for sure, but many women sat on the sidelines, though they supported the man's endeavors.
His aunt Druella was one of those women and his mother had frequently referred to her as
spineless for that choice.

“Do you boys have any more questions about the incident?” Professor McGonagall questioned in a
soft tone.

Sirius shook his head and Regulus must have too because they moved on to the next order of
business rather quickly. Dumbledore spoke, in a slightly less grim tone, “You two have been
requested to attend the Will reading for the Black Estate. It takes place this morning and you will
be excused for the rest of the day. Professor McGonagall will escort you for the day.”

Sirius didn't understand what that meant, “Wait the Will reading? I've been disowned and as far as I
knew so has Reggie.”

Regulus shot a quick glare at Sirius for the use of that nickname, once again reminding him that his
brother and he were not on good terms at the moment. Regulus spoke, in a surprisingly steady tone,
“I'm sure it's just a formality. The reading of the Estate is commonly attended by the closest
relatives and the Ministry doesn't recognize disownment in the same way Pureblood Law does. To
the Ministry, we are still the sons of the deceased which makes us the closest kin, so of course,
they expect us to attend.”

Sirius looked up at the professors to verify that Regulus was correct. McGonagall looked like she
was going to be ill with all the discussion of disownment. Sirius knew that was because she found
the topic ridiculous. She had always wanted kids and the idea that someone would willingly
remove their child from their family was insane. Dumbledore was looking at Regulus with a slight
smile, which told Sirius his brother had impressed the headmaster.

Sirius didn't love the idea of Dumbledore being impressed with his little brother. Sirius had long
since believed that the headmaster had a strictly utilitarian view on life, which he found unsettling
for a man surrounded by hundreds of children. If Dumbledore found Regulus useful, he might
recruit him for the war, and the last thing Sirius wanted was for his brother to be a piece of this
war. Because when in doubt Dumbledore wouldn't mind sacrificing a few lives for the lives of the
many and he would be damned if his brother was one of the few.
“Yes, Regulus. That is my assumption on the matter as well, however seeing as you both have been
effectively disowned, there is the question as to who will inherit the heirdom.”

Sirius furrowed his eyebrows, “I'm sure they made that decision as soon as Reggie left. I'm
assuming they'll have Cygnus as heir until one of our cousins procreate.”

Regulus didn't say anything but he looked to be contemplating the matter, “When is the Will
reading and the funeral?”

Dumbledore's face twisted like he was actually uncomfortable at the moment, “The Will reading is
at 10:30. The funeral is set for later in the day, but unfortunately neither of you are invited at the
request of your mother.”

Wow. Well, he probably should've expected that, but somehow he hadn’t. Of course, she wouldn't
want them there, in fact, she probably would rather not see them again, but the Ministry gets the
final say on who is to be at a Will reading. She had no choice whether they attended that or not.

It's not as if he actually wanted to go. His father had not been a good person and he had despised
him, mostly. However, there was something about someone telling you that you couldn't do
something that made you want to do it more. He ached to see his mother's face, if he were to show
up at the funeral.

After a few moments of silence, Professor McGonagall spoke, “Alright boys, I've had the dress
robes you each took with you to school, brought up by the house elves.” She motioned towards the
robes handing from a cupboard door, “We are going to give you boys some time to change and talk
before we leave. I will be back in about an hour.”

With that, the headmaster and professor left the office. The door closed behind them with a
resounding noise, leaving the two brothers by themselves for the first time in months. The last time
they had been alone it had not gone well.

They both sat there for a long time without speaking, though Sirius was attempting to decide what
he should say to his brother. His brother had never been vocal about how he felt about his parents,
well except for their last argument, but he knew the boy had next to no relationship with his father.

Eventually, he broke the silence of the room, “He was a bastard.”

Regulus snorted softly, “No, he was a pureblood of the most impeccable and incestual breeding.”

“Incestual breeding? Fair enough, considering our mother is also our cousin.”

“Ugh, disgusting.” Regulus wrinkled his nose.

“Do you think he enjoyed it? Buffing his cousin? Like, imagine it was you and Cissy.”

Regulus shot him a glare, with the most comically disgusted look he had ever seen, “Fuck off, don't
put that thought in my head.”

Sirius grinned at him, “What you don't think she's pretty? Especially now that she's dyed her hair to
match Malfoy?”

“Merlin, you're a fucking asshole.”

Sirius shook his head, “No, he was the asshole. The biggest asshole in the world.”

Regulus looked over to Sirius with an unrecognizable expression, “And what would that make our
mother?”

Sirius smirked, “The queen of all bitches.”

Regulus rolled his eyes slightly but looked amused, until his expression flattened once more, “I
can't believe she has the audacity to ban us from our father's funeral. Like we're a couple of
strangers.”

Sirius looked at him closely, the news of not being allowed at the funeral clearly hit him harder
than it did Sirius. Sirius had felt vindictive when he heard the news while Regulus clearly was
upset about it. “Why would you want to go anyways?”

Regulus shook his head, “I don't, not really, but I mean he was our father. It's not right that she can
just tell us we can't go to his funeral.”
Sirius spent a long moment just looking at his brother. His brother had never had much of a
relationship with their father, that was true, but maybe the old man had been softer with him in the
past year. For some reason, Sirius had to know why Regulus felt this way. Why does Regulus have
any feeling of remorse about not being allowed to attend the funeral? What had that man ever done
for Regulus?

“I didn't realize you two were so close.”

Regulus glared at him once more, this time with more heat behind it, “What do you mean?”

Sirius shrugged, and tried to seem nonchalant, “I'm just saying, he hardly ever spoke to you when I
lived there. Never did a thing for you, but suddenly you want to say goodbye like he was the best
father in the world. Did you magically become closer this past year?”

“No.”

“Then why the hell do you want to go to that funeral?”

Regulus didn't answer, he was back to looking at his fingers in his lap. Sirius had almost given up
on getting a reply from his brother when he spoke, in a softer voice than before, “He was a terrible
father, wasn't he? He never really gave a shit about me. The only reason he had me at all was just
in case something happened to their firstborn. That's how they treated me all my life, ya know?
Like a safety net and an unwanted one at that.”

Sirius hadn’t been expecting his brother to open up to him like that. His brother never talked about
his feelings on things, as a result of their mother's “Don't show weakness” mantra. Regulus had
avoided the funeral question, but Sirius was willing to let that go.

“Did you ever wonder why they were like that? I mean I know pureblood families are all about
propriety, but there's no rule that says they have to treat their children like objects, is there? I mean
I might hate the Malfoys with a burning passion but Abraxus Malfoy is anything but dispassionate
about his son. Why aren’t our parents like that?”

Regulus frowned slightly as if he never really considered the idea, “I think it's because they have
no love for each other. They never wanted to marry each other, Cygnus has told us that before. So,
how can they be fond of the children they made with someone they more than likely despised.”
Sirius thought back to all the interactions he saw his parents have in all those years. They never
touched, they hardly looked at each other, and they only spoke in a proper way. Maybe Reg was
right, maybe it really was as simple as that. They hated looking at their children because it was a
reminder of their forced marriage.

“You may be right on that one, but still it's shitty. We got dealt a bad hand, brother.”

Regulus’s eyes softened slightly at the word brother, “That we did.”

Regulus reached into his pocket and Sirius wondered whether he was getting the letter out once
more, but no he was taking out a carton of cigarettes.

Sirius watched in shock as his baby brother put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it, taking a deep
breath. He gaped at him for a moment, before Regulus turned and offered him one.

He hesitated, was he really about to smoke in the headmasters office with his little brother? It was a
tad more taboo then his usual behavior, but fuck his namesake was dead. He could do whatever he
wanted. He took one and let Reggie light it for him. When had Regulus stared smoking? He was
fifteen for Merlins sake.

He took a deep breath, enjoying the pleasant burn in his chest. They sat their for a few minutes,
before he spoke, “You know these are terrible for you.”

Regulus snorted, “Little late for a lecture, big bro.”

Sirius didn’t reply and they sat there finishing their smoke. Until Regulus cleared his throat and
straightened in his seat, “Well we should probably start getting dressed before McGonagall comes
back.”

Sirius didn't know how long it had been since she left but he nodded anyways. He vanished his bud
and Regulus did the same. They both took their time getting changed, not speaking the rest of the
time. The dress robes were something every student was supposed to bring for special occasions
that could pop up throughout the year, but most of the time they just gathered dust. Sirius had only
had cause to wear dress robes once since he started Hogwarts, for a dance in the third year.
Once they finished getting ready they sat back in the chairs until McGonagall came back in,
dressed in slightly more casual robes than she had been for school. She didn’t mention the obvious
smell of smoke, “Alright, boys are you ready to go?”

They both nodded and she moved both of them to the large ornate fireplace and grabbed a bowl
with floo power inside, “We aren't allowed to floo straight to the Ministry because we have to go
through security, but we are going to floo to one of the public location in London, that's not too far
from the Ministry and is away from muggle eyes.”

They nodded and she motioned for Sirius to step through first, but not before warning him, “Now
you are going to say Victrum’s Tavern, very cleary and then you will step out and wait for us. If
you wander away, I am going to be very angry.”

She held out the bowl for him to take some of the substance and he repeated her words as he threw
down the powder, green flames enveloped him immediately. When he arrived at Vicrum’s Tavern,
he found a place that wasn't terribly different from the Leaky Cauldron. It was gross and dark, but
it was clearly a wizard tavern, from the quidditch posters on the bar wall.

Almost immediately after he stepped out, his brother appeared behind him, in the green flames. He
looked around at the tavern with a disgusted sneer on his face. Typical Reggie, a snobbish prat if
he ever did see one. He didn't get a chance to say this to his brother because McGonagall came
quickly after him. She immediately started motioning for them to follow her.

She led them out the door of the raggedy tavern and they soon found themselves walking the
streets of London, towards the Ministry. Sirius hadn’t spent much time in London, except when his
father used to take him to the Ministry for business. It was safe to guess that Reggie had spent even
less time there, from the way his eyes were taking in all the scenery the city had to offer.

It wasn't a terribly long walk before they arrived at the side of a rather plain building, with a red
telephone box. McGonagall opened the door for them and they all squeezed in there, without much
room to move. She picked up the muggle telephone and put muggle money in. He couldn't hear
what the phone asked of her but he did hear her say, “The Will and Estate reading of Orion Black.”

Within a minute they were being lowered beneath the streets of London, and soon they entered the
atrium of the Ministry of Magic. Again, Regulus was looking around like everything was new to
him. Sirius hadn't been there in a few years, but his father had taken him fairly often before that.
Regulus didn't seem to have ever been to the Ministry, which made Sirius wonder what his father
had been teaching his brother about the heir duties since he left.
McGonagall marched them to the visitor desk where they received name tags and had their wands
checked. After the man at the desk told her where she needed to go, she marched them into one of
the many elevators. Sirius remembered how queasy these elevators made him every time he had to
ride them. When she picked their location they were shot backward and then down and then to the
right, it made Sirius's stomach lurch.

Once they arrived, they heard a voice telling them their location and the three of them quickly
stepped out of the vomit-inducing elevators. Sirius looked over to Regulus and noticed his brother
looked green, and he chanced a moment of brotherly comfort. He set his hand on Regulus’s back
and rubbed in circles until Regulus started to feel better.

They stood there for a few minutes getting their bearings in check. When Regulus realized Sirius
was rubbing his back, he shot him a look that told Sirius to back off imediately. He stepped back
and looked at McGonagall, who was looking at the brothers with a soft smile on her face.

“Alright, is everyone feeling better then?” She waited for the boys to nod and then motioned
toward the hallway in front of them, “Alright so it's not too far from here boys, but before we go in
I just want to prepare you. You are going to see your family in there, your mother, cousins, aunts,
and uncles. I know you are not on the best terms with all of them at the moment, so I have
disclosed that information with the security and they will be present to make sure everyone is on
their best behavior.”

Sirius and Regulus looked at each other, both a little shocked that their professor had thought so far
ahead. They both had been dreading seeing their mother again. At least Sirius knew had been and
Regulus was on worse terms with her at the moment.

“Now, only direct relatives of your father are allowed in the room. So I will not be able to go in
with you, but I will be outside waiting for you as soon as you get out. This also means that your
cousin's husband and fiance will not be allowed, as they are just distant enough to not make the
cut, though I figured you'd both appreciate that fact. The fewer family members to contend with the
better. Also your cousin Andromeda has been excused from today's proceedings.”

Regulus looked puzzled, “Why can she be excused but we can’t? We've all been disowned.”

Sirius figured that was a good point. As far as Pureblood Law went, none of them were part of the
Black family any longer and by Ministry standards, Andromeda should still have to come.

“I don't know all the details but I believe her husband pulled some strings so she didn’t have to
come today.”
Theodore Tonks was an Auror, Sirius knew that, but still he was surprised he had managed to pull
strings to disrupt a legal proceeding like this. Then again he should just be grateful that her
husband had managed it. Andy didn't deserve the kind of dirty looks and comments she would
undoubtedly receive from the family. Of course Regulus and he would be receiving the same thing,
but still at least they didn't all have to be subjected to it.

When Sirius glanced at Regulus, he could tell that his brother still wasn't sure about that
explanation but he quickly had to let it go as McGonagall strode down the hallway. They caught up
to her as she stopped outside a large black door. She turned to them, “Alright boys, this is where
you will go in. Good luck and be brave.”

Shockingly she leaned toward Regulus and gave him a kiss on the forehead and then she quickly
moved to Sirius and did the same. They both were so shocked they didn't move. Sirius knew that
McGonagall was a mother figure to most students, but he had never seen her openly behave like
one. He found he quite loved Minerva McGonagall. Meanwhile, Regulus looked more conflicted
than ever.

Sirius took the first step and opened the door, striding into the room with as much confidence as he
could muster. He could feel Regulus walking behind him and he tried not to wince as the large
door made a booming sound as it closed. Suddenly all the eyes in the room were on them.
Everyone but the security and Druella had the same grey eyes as them.

It barely took a moment before the room erupted in chaos, which made the three security guards
spring into action. Their mother was the first to move, she had been talking to Cygnus, by one of
the open chairs surrounding the room. As soon as she laid eyes on her traitorous sons, she began
screaming like a banshee, “HOW DARE YOU SHOW YOUR FACES HERE! YOU ARE NOT
WELCOME HERE! ORION WOULDN'T WANT YOU HERE AND NEITHER DO WE!
LEAVE, YOU FILTHY BLOOD TRAITORS!”

She advanced on them as she yelled, quickly being restrained by the guards. She struggled but soon
they silenced her and restrained her in a chair with a spell. Cygnus looked slightly amused at the
sight of his sister being detained but when his eyes landed back on his two nephews, there was
burning hate in them.

Sirius wasn't particularly surprised, as much as Cygnus was more relaxed and laid back than his
parents, the Black name was still the most important thing to him. Both his nephews, especially
Regulus, had spit on that name.

Druella sneered at them and adopted her sickly sweet tone, “Oh how lovely it is to have the family
all together like this. When did we last see Sirius, my dear?” She turned to Cygnus as if he was
actually going to respond, “I think it must've been when abandoned his family duties and went off
to live with those filthy blood traitors. And Regulus of course when he decided to cry abuse to
Ministry after we had just spent a lovely family Christmas together. Tell me, does anyone here
remember him being physically and mentally abused during that dinner?”

Druella was always one for backhanded comments and snark but even this seemed a little too
pointed for her taste. Sirius figured that was how one could tell she was really angry. Regulus
flinched at the implication that he was lying to the Ministry about everything that had happened.
Sirius nearly reached out to comfort him but decided against it when his eyes locked with Bellatrix.

Bellatrix had a manic grin on her face as she sat in one of the chairs, looking at her two younger
cousins. She didn't look angry about their presence, no she looked positively delighted. Long ago
Bellatrix had actually been one of his favorite cousins, that was before she went to Hogwarts and
went mad. It had been many years since he felt comfortable even being in a room with her
anymore. She had long since lost her humanity it seemed, and it was bound to only be worse since
she became a death eater.

“I don't know mother, I seem to remember him getting all squeamish when my dear aunt Walpurga
was asking about him not writing more. I mean how cruel can a woman be to request that her son
write her more, it was obviously abuse of the highest order. Practically torture from what I
remember.” Bellatrix cackled loudly and it sent a shiver down Sirius’s spine.

Sirius wasn't going to allow this, he wasn't going to allow his cousin and aunt to cook up some
story about Regulus being a compulsive liar or something. He snarled at his manic cousin, “Not
that far of a stretch really, considering just talking to you is practically torture, Bella.”

Her eyes burned at her younger cousin, who dared to address her directly, “Oh so the little coward
talks for the little liar. How intriguing! Tell me are you two growing closer now that both can bond
over being the disowned blood traitors?” Bellatrix turned to Narcissa, who was sitting quietly next
to her, “Isn't that so sweet, Cissy? Our dear cousins found each other after they were both brutally
abused by their family. It's like a fairy tale.”

Her tone was bitter and mocking, Sirius would like nothing more than to storm over there and
punch her in the face. Instead he didn't reply, just scanned the faces of his closest family members.
Narcissa and Alphard were the only two that looked uncomfortable at the words being exchanged,
which wasn't a huge surprise to Sirius. Narcissa would never be his favorite cousin, but she wasn't
a vicious woman by any means and Alphard never liked most of the family anyways.

It was odd seeing his entire family together once more, well except for one person. Orion Black's
absence was very noticeable in this room. His father wasn't very talkative, but he usually could be
found next to Cygnus at any given time. Now the space near Cygnus’s side was obviously empty.
Sirius wondered whether his uncle was feeling that loss stronger than anyone else in the room at
the moment.

Walpurga may have lost a husband, but Cygnus had lost his best friend. His uncle was not a good
man and neither had his father been, but at that moment he felt a little bad for his uncle. He
imagined losing James in that way and it hurt. It hurt more than anything he could possibly
imagine. Now he didn't know the full extent of the cousin's relationship, but he knew that they had
been close. So maybe they hadn’t been like him and James, but it still probably hurt badly.

Sirius wondered whether his uncle was the death eater that took his father from the battle. If his
uncle was there, then he would bet that he was. It was unlikely that he would just let the man lie
there while the battle waged on.

Luckily before any other family members could exchange words, the legal representative for the
Ministry entered the chambers from a door across the room. He strode into the room, before sitting
at the desk that was the focus of the room, setting his briefcase down on it. He motioned to the
chairs spaced out around the desk, “My name is Terrance Wellby. I am the legal examiner for the
Will and Estate of Orion Pollux Black. If you would all please take a seat and we will begin the
reading and dispersal.”

Surprisingly no member of their family had anything to say to that, as they shuffled to their seats.
Sirius and Regulus sat far from the rest of the family. Alphard sat next to Walpurga and her guards
and Bellatrix and Narcissa sat next to their parents.

Wellby shuffled the papers from his briefcase and set a folder down in front of him, “The contents
of this folder, contain the Will and Estate of the Black family. As you all are aware, Orion was the
sole heir of the Black fortune and properties, and in classic Pureblood Law, he ordained a new heir
for the family. This person will be in charge of all financial, legal, and political matters for the
family. This is binding and there will be no changes allowed unless the new heir passes away. I
can confirm that Orion Black was in his right mind when creating this. Mr. Black did make a few
changes from the classic Black family Will and Testimony. In the past, everything has been
designated to the new heir and they would be in charge of providing funds for the living members
of the family, however, Mr. Black has included those divisions in his will. This will was updated
on April 23rd, 1976.”

Sirius looked at his uncle Cynus, attempting to understand what this change meant. Mainly his
uncle just looked a bit confused by what Wellby had stated. Sirius focused back on Wellby.

“Alright so to begin with the proceedings, to my niece Narcissa Lyra Black I bequeath a dowry of
10,000 galleons upon her marriage or on her twenty-third birthday. To my niece Bellatrix Aquila
Lestrange nee Black will receive the remainder of her dowry, which had been divided into an
allowance upon her marriage, the sum total remaining is 5,000 galleons.”

Sirius vaguely remembered appraising the value of his cousin's dowry when he used to do his heir
training with his father. He also remembered his father's immense pride at being able to provide
such a hefty sum for his cousins. Even back then their dowries were much higher than other
pureblood families and considering they both had Andromeda’s share to split between them now,
their dowry was now insanely large.

Personally, Sirius found dowries to be outdated and useless, specifically in the pureblood
community. Not only was it insulting to the women, but it was also ridiculous because the families
that his cousins married into or were about to marry into were already wealthy. Both the Lestrange
and Malfoy houses were similar in wealth to the Black family, so they certainly didn't need his
cousin's dowries. In fact the only of his cousins that actually could have used a dowry was Andy.
Ted and she had struggled financially for a while before Ted started to make good money as an
Auror.

No, his cousin's dowries were not a surprising thing, although it was a bit of a surprise that his
father had stated that Narcissa would receive her dowry even if she wasn't married by the time she
was twenty-three. Made even more confusing by the fact that she was due to get married in only a
few months.

“To my cousin Alphard Cetus Black I bequeath a yearly allowance of 5,000 galleons, all ownership
and profits for Black Furniture and Goods, and ownership of his cottage in Wales.”

Now that was a fucking shock. Alphard let out a noise of disbelief, while Cygnus and Druella
began whispering to each other. It sounded as if they might’ve been arguing. One glance at his
mother told him that she was furious, She was clearly swearing, not that anyone could hear her.
Sirius was so glad that the security had thought to put a silencing spell on her.

Pureblood families usually kept all business ventures, finances, and real estate under the umbrella
of the family as a whole, so this was incredibly odd. His father had essentially given Alphard
freedom from the family. Of course, the man would still get his yearly allowance, but other than
that, he was completely separate. Sirius had never seen his uncle look so thrilled in his life. He
briefly looked at Regulus to see his reaction, since he would be moving in with their uncle. The
fact that his uncle now had his own finances, would make it much easier to keep the fact that
Regulus was living with him from the family. Regulus didn't look at Alphard, instead, he was
staring at his hands thoughtfully.

“To my wife Walpurga Viance Black I bequeath a monthly allowance of 2,000 galleons, and
permanent housing in 12 Grimmauld Place along with all benefits as the lady of the house.”
Again not super surprising, though Sirius really didn't think his mother needed that high of monthly
allowance, he figured that while everyone else in the family had other income, she did not. Her
permanent residence in 12 Grimmauld Place was the least his father could allow her, but it was
unlikely that when Cygnus became heir that he would make her leave anyways.

“To my cousin Cygnus Scorpius Black I bequeath a yearly allowance of 15,000 galleons, his seat
on the Wizengamont until a new heir comes of age and is appointed at his discretion, and the Black
Manor, his current residence.”

What?

That's it? Sirius is aware of the massive difference in Alphard and Cynus’s inheritance, probably a
result of his father and uncle's close relationship, but it was clear that the heirdom did not fall to
Cygnus. His father had left a massive allowance to his favorite cousin, his own house, which again
is very generous in Pureblood Law, and made it clear that Cygnus was to remain in his seat on the
Wizengamont until he choose his replacement in the family.

The Black family had two seats, technically one is for the head of household and the other is
supposed to go to the heir, but both Regulus and Sirius were too young to have the seat. So it fell to
Cygnus, and his father is now letting him keep one of the seats, but who gets the other? And who
the hell was the heir?

It was clear the rest of the family was just as confused as he was, Cygnus in particular looked
shocked, “Wait, are you sure?”

Wellby held up his hand to stop the whispering the family was partaking in, “Please do save your
discussions for the end, and yes Mr. Black I am very sure. I handled this Estate and Orion Black’s
Will, personally.”

He continued after everyone quieted, riveted to hear an explanation, “To my eldest son Sirius Orion
Black–”

“What!”

“Is this a joke?”

“What the hell is going on!”

“Calm down! We’ll get to the bottom of this.”

Sirius wasn't sure which of his family members yelled these disagreements because he was so
shocked at hearing his own name on a Will from his father. His father hated him. He had disowned
him. He had watched as Walpurga burned his face off the family tapestry. He had watched as their
mother had punished him for refusing to take the mark. And now he left him…..something.

When he realized the man had stopped taking, he looked up. He found his family yelling
obscenities, but there was no sound. They had been silenced by the guards, but he could still see
the anger on their faces. He looked at Regulus, his brother was looking at him in shock.

Wellby coughed, looking uncomfortable with the amount of animosity this family held for each
other, “If I may continue, I expect no more interruptions or we will have to silence you two as
well.” He gestured between the two brothers, so they were the only ones who hadn’t needed to be
silenced or restrained in any way, “To my eldest son Sirius Orion Black I bequeath and a yearly
allowance of 3,000 galleons and the cottage near Bristol.”

Holy shit. Holy shit. He had always loved that cottage when when his father and he would visit
their estates, when he was much younger. He must have told his father this at some point and here
he was giving it to him. He was giving his disowned son, one of the family properties and an
allowance. A fucking big allowance too, even if Remus and he didn't get a job, they could live on
that yearly income, no problem. Holy fucking shit. This changes everything.

Sirius was so shocked over his inheritance that he didn't even register when Wellby began speaking
again, “And lastly to my youngest son Regulus Arcturus Black, I bequeath the heirdom in full.
Everything not already spoken for is his to manage for the family. Providing that he honors the
dowries, inheritances, and allowances bequeathed by the previous heir, there are no restrictions on
his heirdom. It is his responsibility to continue the Black family name and fortune in full.”

Sirius turned to look at his brother slowly, because holy shit. His father had just given the son, that
had literally just thrown the family name through the mud with his accusations, everything.
Regulus kept a blank face, but his lips were pursed and his eyes were panicked. He was freaking
the fuck out.

“Okay that ends our legal proceedings for today, I believe the funeral for Orion Black is set for
2:00 this afternoon. For the safety of everyone involved, the silencing spells and wrist restraints
will not be lifted until each member reaches the apparition point. Please make your way carefully
and safely out and I am very sorry for your loss.”

One by one their family marched passed them, as they were the closest to the door. Walpurga had
to be escorted and she was still screaming at them, but luckily they couldn't hear her. Cygnus also
had an escort but he was just glaring venomously down at them. Druella followed behind him,
silently looking repulsed by the turn of events. Bellatrix had apparently abandoned her anger for
manic joy once more. She was laughing as she passed them, Sirius was very glad not to be
subjected to her creepy laugh.

Narcissa went next and much to Sirius’ surprise she offered them both a soft smile as she passed.
Sirius couldn't remember the last time she smiled at him, but Regulus didn't look surprised by it.
He must still talk to her regularly enough. Alphard was last and he didn't seem to have any
restraints on him as he leaned down to hug Sirius quickly and then did the same to Regulus. Sirius
whispered quietly, not wanting to alert the family that wasn't too far ahead of him, “Thank you, i’ll
write you.”

Once the room was cleared, and the legal team and security were gone, Mcgonagall stepped into
the room. She looked concerned, probably from what she had seen of their family as they walked
by her, “Are you boys okay?”

Sirius cleared his throat, “Yeah, we're fine. Thank you for the security, it was very necessary.”

She stopped in front of them with a soft smile on her face, “Of course. Well, do you boys want a
minute or should we find a place for lunch?”

That seemed to catch the attention of Regulus, who had been staring at his hands since Alphard had
left them, “I need to visit Mr. Rufus Herman before we leave, please.”

Sirius furrowed his eyebrows, “Who is that?”

McGonagall said at the same time, “I'm not sure, that see–”

Regulus stood up, suddenly looking more sure of himself, “I need to see Rufus Herman in the legal
department, so he can forward all the paperwork for the heirdom directly to me at school.”
McGonagall looked uneasy at this news, which Sirus could understand. There was something
unsavory about the idea of a fifteen-year-old having to manage an entire family's finances as well
as attend school. Considering Regulus' penchant for over-exerting himself, the outlook was not
good. But she nodded anyways and soon they found themself waiting outside of this Rufus guy's
office, while Regulus talked business with him.

He was in there for a least a half hour, which gave Sirius enough time to update McGonagall on
everything that had taken place in the room. She seemed happy for him, at his excitement about
having a place to live after school, but she was concerned for Regulus. Sirius was concerned for his
brother as well, of course, but there wasn't much he could do to change the outcome of today's Will
reading.

The door in front of them suddenly opened and Regulus strode out, suddenly exhibiting mountains
of confidence that he hadn’t shown when he walked into the room to begin with. He turned to
them, “Okay, we have one more stop and then we can go get lunch.”

He didn't even wait for McGonagall to agree before he walked off, making them rush behind him
to catch up.

***************************************************

He had led them to a funeral home, not far from the Ministry. The location where their father's
funeral would take place at. How Regulus discovered its location of it, is beyond him. They weren't
allowed to be there, but they were. McGonagall didn't seem to know what to say when he told her
they were going to see his father. She obviously didn't like the idea of drifting from the plan, yet
she was allowing it.

The funeral wasn't for another two hours, so Sirius wasn't worried about running into the family.
However, he was concerned with how they were going to get into the room their father was held,
with the bulking security guard in front of the door. Why his mother would hire a security guard to
guard their dead father was beyond him. Then again he wouldn't be surprised if she only hired him
to keep them away from their father.

Regulus didn't seem concerned with the guard as he stepped up to the man, “I am the heir of the
Ancient and Noble House of Black. I am going to see my father.”
The man seemed taken aback by his confidence and possibly the fact that this young boy was the
heir of a notable family like theirs. He stepped aside and allowed Regulus and Sirius into the room.
He stopped Mcgonagall, claiming that only family was allowed, but she didn't seem concerned and
just let them know she'd be outside.

The room was large, with chairs set up for the service, facing a dark casket. The floor was blood
red and the walls were a dark grey, it reminded him of Grimmauld Place. Maybe that's why his
mother chose this location. Regulus stepped up to the casket and he followed, “Reg, are you sure
about this?”

Regulus nodded determinedly and opened the top half of the casket. He pushed the top completely
open and suddenly Sirius was looking down at him.

Orion Black, dead.

They both just stared at him, his face was grim, but it always had been. He was in black dress robes
and there was a permanent ring mark from wear he had worn the family ring. It wasn't there, of
course, his ring was more than likely placed in one of their vaults as Gringotts, for Regulus to wear
eventually.

Looking at his father's thick fingers, he knew that Regulus’s thin and long fingers would never fit
the ring without some adjusting. He was startled out of his examination of their father's
countenance by Reggie's voice, it sounded strained, “Why do you think he did it? Made me the
heir.”

Sirius looked down at his father, thinking, and then back at his brother whose eyes were trained on
the man's face, “It's sort of obvious, isn't it?”

Regulus looked away from their father, meeting his eyes in confusion, “What do you mean?”

“I mean, look at what you've done since you found out. You've already had things forwarded to
Hogwarts and broke us into our father's funeral and it's only been like an hour. Meanwhile, he left
me some money and a house and I can barely manage a competent thought. I have no idea why he
did it and it's killing me. But you've been all business since you found out, clearly, you were meant
for this life more than me.”

Regulus sighed before looking down at their father again, “He loved you.”
“What?” Sirius’s eyes were wide and confused.

“Well, he loved you as much as he could. I don't think either of our parents were strictly capable of
love, but he always was fond of you. I don't think he ever knew how to express emotions of any
kind, but both he and mother preferred you over me. They always thought you were more worthy
of the heirdom. Maybe you are right and he thought I could handle the pressure better, but I don't
know. I do know that the reason he gave you that house and money, is because he wanted to make
sure you were okay after he died. He probably only waited so long, because of mother. It's not like
she can say anything to him now about it though.”

Orion Black, dead.

Sirius was a little surprised by that observation. He had not been expecting that and he wasn't sure
Regulus was correct. His father never seemed to feel anything stronger than indifference for him,
but maybe Regulus had a better idea about it. After all most of his time growing up had been spent
watching our father teach me the ropes of being the heir. Maybe Regulus had picked up on
something. Still, as Sirius looked at his father he realized that it didn't matter. It didn't matter if
Regulus was correct or not, because his father had still been terrible to him while he was alive.
Money from a dead man couldn't make up for all the years of suffering he had endured from that
house.

Regulus held out a piece of parchment to him, he took it, examining it. It was the death letter, Reg
had tried to give him earlier. He unfolded it, opening it and finding nothing. Well, almost nothing.
In tiny letters, his father had written, “It's all on you now.”

Fucking bullshit. He used his last words to put some cryptic sentence on piece of parchment and
send it to his estranged son. It was typical mind games bullshit and Sirius was just about to tell
Regulus so.

Until his brother spoke interrupting his thoughts, “I think he knew a lot more than he let on,
especially about us.”

“What do you mean?”

“That crack he made in his will, “It is his responsibility to continue the Black name and fortune in
full” and this letter too “It's all on you.”” Sirius furrowed his eyebrows, really not understanding
what these two things had in common with the subject. His brother didn't look at him as he
 continued, “He was trying to guilt me, trying to push my duties to the family above everything else
in my life. He wa–wants to put family before my……boyfriend.”

Sirius heard a sharp inhalation of breath and it took him a moment to realize it was him that made
the sound. Regulus finally looked at him, his eyes vulnerable, “I'm gay, Sirius.”

Sirius wasted no time after the initial shock wore off. He pulled his brother into a hug and held
him. Almost immediately his brother started sobbing and he held him for what felt like forever. It
might have been forever, he wasn't sure. It wasn't until the tears dried from his brother's face that
he let go.

“I love you, Reg. I am proud of you no matter what. It doesn't matter what the old man expects, all
that matters is if you're happy.”

Regulus nodded, but there was something in his expression that told Sirius that he disagreed. Sirius
was about to reiterate his point when Regulus spoke next, suddenly in a much more cheery
manner, “Well Professor McGonagall has waited long enough. Let's go get lunch.”

With that, he strode out and Sirius was left wondering if everything had changed with Regulus,
from moment that Will was read.

Chapter End Notes

Okay, I am starting my big girl job this week, so if it takes me slightly longer to
update, I apologize. I am not sure how busy I will be from the start, but I will work on
the next chapter whenever I have a chance. I also just want to warn everyone, that
there are not going to be a whole lot of fluffy moments in the upcoming several
chapters. They will still be good though, I promise! Thanks for reading!
 Father of the Year
Chapter Notes

I know ya'll been waiting for this one too long and I apologize for that. It took me an
embarrassingly long time to get started on it. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter
despite the delay!

Remus

Remus’s skin was itching. For once it wasn't because of the day of the month or his unfortunate
illness. No, today his skin was itching because he was going absolutely out of his mind without
Sirius beside him. If he looked deeper into the problem it was probably something to do with the
wolf inside him anyways. Like the wolf was trying fruitlessly to escape his skin in an attempt to
find and comfort his mate.

Right, he's going to pretend he didn't just refer to Sirius as his mate, unconsciously, when he was
still two weeks away from his next transition. As if his entire life hadn’t been agony enough, the
last thing he needed was the animal inside him to start taking over his rational thoughts. He knew
that the wolf referred to Sirius as his mate on a full moon, but Remus would be damned if he ever
did it when he was in control. No, Sirius was just his boyfriend, the man he loved.

The man he loved was currently away from Hogwarts on “Family business” as if that wasn't a
terrifying thought. Remus was aware that wealthy pureblood families had many finances and
estates to settle, but considering that Sirius was very estranged from his family, he wasn't sure why
he had to be there. Though it seemed that Regulus was with him as well.

Remus had been so wrapped up in his own business all day that he probably wouldn't even have
noticed Regulus’s absence if it hadn’t been for the way James had been chewing his fingernails all
day. Remus would like to believe that James was only concerned for their best friend but he knew
that absolutely was not the case.

Sure James was worried about Sirius, the same way Peter was. They were deeply concerned but
they were able to function, or at least that's what it seemed like. Remus had felt like a ghost of
himself for the entire day. He was struggling to focus on anything because all he could think about
was the fact that Sirius probably had to see his horrendous mother after a year and a half of
freedom. Merlin, Remus wished he was there to hold his hand and comfort him.
Remus wasn't exactly certain of Sirus's reaction to the news of his father being dead. Remus knew
that his own feelings leaned closer to relief than anything, even though that made him a terrible
person. He was relieved that Sirius’s father was dead. He was relieved that there was one less
person to drag Sirius back into that family and that life. That relief dissipated the moment
McGonagall came to their table and asked Sirius to come with her.

They had only found out where he had gone, during their first class, Transfiguration, where
Professor Flitwick was filling in for McGonagall. When they enquired after their friend, he
reluctantly disclosed that he was with his family, dealing with some important matters.

Remus' heart sank the minute he heard those words, Sirius was with them. Those awful people who
had hurt him so badly before. Remus had to calm himself as quickly as possible before he did
something stupid like try to go find Sirius and bring him back to him. That would only make things
much worse. If the teachers knew about his location then he was just fine, Remus reassured
himself.

He had spent the entire day alternating between worrying about Sirius and trying to decipher the
expression Sirius had held when he first read the newspaper. How was this all affecting him?
Remus genuinely wasn't sure. Sirius had a habit of making bold statements that he didn't exactly
mean when he was angry or upset about something. He was an incredibly stubborn man who didn't
like to change his opinion once it was voiced.

That's why he had so many issues with his brother. When Regulus first seemed to be deferring to
his parents rather than Sirius as kids, Sirius had been so upset that he had to disparage his
relationship with his younger brother. Which led to a whole mess of problems, but even given all
the two brother's issues Remus was genuinely glad that Sirius wasn't alone today.

Sirius had a complicated relationship with his father. Remus had heard him rant about how much
he hated the man a million times. He had also heard Sirius tell stories about his father when he was
younger, they were some of the only fond memories he seemed to have in that house, aside from
the ones involving Regulus.

It was pretty difficult to get Sirius to discuss his childhood unless he was making a sarcastic
comment about the inbreeding and insanity of his family line. If Sirius happened to be in the right
mood to discuss memories of his childhood, they almost always involved Regulus or Andromeda.
Very rarely, though, he would bring up his father.

He would bring up the time his father first took him to the family vaults, and how he let Sirius pick
out anything they wanted. He would offhandedly mention how his father used to stroke his hair
when he thought Sirius had fallen asleep during his heir lessons. He would laugh about the time his
uncle Cygnus and father taught him to play a card game using a deck of cards with nearly naked
ladies on them.

Alongside those few good memories were many bad ones, though they mostly involved Orion
standing by while Walpurga harmed or screamed at her sons. He would describe in detail his
father's bored expression while she whipped curses at their legs until big welts rose on their skin.
He would describe the way he would do nothing as Sirius and Regulus begged him to make their
mother stop. He would even describe the admonishments they would get for begging him for help
because they were disrespecting their mother.

It made Remus sick just thinking about Sirius and Regulus as small children begging for their
father's help, while crying from the pain their mother was inflicting on them, only to be told that
they were being disrespectful.

If it were Remus he would hate him. He would be glad the man that was a part of so many painful
memories was dead. Remus was glad, even though it wasn't his father, even though he didn't
experience any of those moments.

Sirius wasn't Remus and even though he was the most stubborn man Remus had ever met, he
would more than likely have more complicated feelings about the matter. Sure, Sirius would tell
everyone he was thrilled, Remus knew that already, but nothing with Sirius was ever simple.

It was sort of like when Sirius would tell the Marauders how much he hated Regulus, false and
practically a farce. Sirius had a habit of telling his closest friends what he thought they wanted to
hear instead of what he was actually feeling. Except it was always apparent to Remus when he was
lying and it always had been, ever since they were eleven.

Sirius might’ve hated his father, even though Remus wasn't sure it could be that simple, but he also
cared for the father he knew as a child. Remus was worried that Sirius would be sad when he
returned because he wasn't sure he could even fake sympathy for that man dying. He didn’t want to
be put in the position to cause Sirius even more distress.

Sirius had looked so shocked when he had read the headline for the newspaper and as Remus read
over his shoulder he could only imagine his boyfriend's surprise at the news. Death wasn't exactly
a rare article in the Profit these days. The Profit almost always headlined with the tragic news about
the current state of affairs regarding the war that was raging outside the school walls. An article
had never really affected their group so hard before, though they often felt grief for certain
muggleborn families that were being ravaged by the war.
Then again they had never been personally connected to anyone that had died. Not that Remus,
Peter, or James had any kind of connection with Orion Black, but they were all guilty of association
with his sons. There was also something different about the way the Profit ran this article. As
usual, it was fairly straightforward with the details, only hinting toward allegiances rather than
blatantly stating them.

No, it was the way they were so forthright with their headline, “Orion Black, Dead.” that Remus
found so odd. Usually, headlines to an article said things like, “Another Muggleborn Family
Attacked” or “Families Devastated by Unknown War Deaths”. They almost never stated a name or
family name in the headline unless they were a high-ranking ministry official. Remus wasn't sure if
Orion Black ranked high enough in societal importance to be named in the headline on the front
page of the Profit. Orion Black was a very well-known man and the family was practically
infamous, so if it was a question of notoriety then perhaps that was the reason they ran the headline
with his full name.

As fucked up as that would be Remus had a feeling that it was for a much more sinister reason.
Remus debated whether the writers of the Prophet were cruel enough to use the death of a
prominent pureblood figure, one who from the information provided in the rest of the article was
definitely a death eater, to pin a face to the bone-chilling mask of the death eaters.

Remus supposed it was fair enough for them to do, as Orion Black had been a death eater, but he
couldn't even begin to imagine the implications that an action like this could have on the sons of
the death eater. Orion Black wasn't the first death eater to die, not by a long shot, but he was the
most notable. Except for Abraxas Malfoy, who had died nearly five years ago at the beginning of
the Voldemort conflict.

Of course, at that time it had been much too early to pin any crimes on wealthy pureblood families,
but now, when the entire wizarding world was terrified of the megalomaniac and his band of
followers, there was much less protection afforded to even the rich and powerful.

As Remus had said, Orion Black, himself completely deserved any ire he received, even after his
death, but his sons did not. Remus was worried about what people would say to them. It was
unlikely that many of their classmates would be very direct with them, but grown adults were more
likely to be a lot more forthright with their opinions of their father and family in general.

Which simply wasn't fair as neither of them was even on speaking terms with their family, as far as
Remus knew. According to James, Regulus had no desire to have any contact with the lot of them,
after what they had done to him last Christmas and Remus knew Sirius hadn’t had any desire to see
them since he first started Hogwarts.

Remus had already heard more than a few people talking about the Black family being death eaters
and the article had only come out today. Remus worried about what people would say about Sirius
in the weeks to come. He only hoped they'd have the decency to not say anything to his face. Sirius
was not one to shy from a fight and if he got into a fight, then all the Marauders would have to join
in.

Remus really wasn't sure it would come to any of that and it was better for his mental health not to
jump to conclusions. He wasn't even sure what Sirius’s mood was going to be like when he got
back. He had spent the day with his family, which usually would make it a good bet to say he was
irritated. However, Remus wasn't sure how his father's death would really affect Sirius.

Remus already knew that James refused to feel sympathy for that man dying. James wasn't the type
of man to ever say such a horrendous thing out loud, but Remus knew. He knew from the words he
had heard his friend speak earlier. It had been the first actual words he had spoken to his friends
since breakfast. Mostly he just looked lost in thought for long periods of time. He would respond to
simple questions, but he didn't respond to anything that would require him to string a sentence
together. Yes and no were all he seemed to be able to manage at the moment.

It wasn't till after their second class of the day that he finally spoke, “Orion Black is dead and he
ruined everything on his way out.”

Remus hadn’t responded at the time, too perplexed by the severity of the statement. He vaguely
remembered Peter attempting to talk to James about it, but he didn't think his friend was successful.
The few moments where his mind would stray from his constant worry for Sirius, he considered
what James had meant.

After spending quite a lot of time throughout the day considering these words, he decided to ask
James about it during their last class of the day, History of Magic. He happened to sit right next to
James, so it was fairly easy for him to lean over and ask while Professor Binns droned on about the
Goblin Rebellion of 1643. “What did you mean earlier? About Orion ruining everything.”

James turned to him slowly, barely dragging his eyes away from where they had been glued to a
spot on his desk, “I mean that he was a terrible man, that deserved everything that was coming to
him, but he didn't just take himself down, he took down everything with him.”

Remus had both been expecting a response like that and not expecting it. Remus had similar
thoughts throughout the day, but for some reason, Remus hadn’t expected to hear it come from
James. Remus was a cynic at the best of times, but James was one of the most optimistic people
Remus knew. He could almost always find the good in people, even if they didn't deserve it. This
was a new side to James and Remus wasn't sure where it had come from.
He cleared his throat slightly, trying to find the right question to follow up with, “Do you mean
because everyone knows he was a death eater now, and they'll expect it from his sons?”

James looked thoughtful for a moment, and if it was any other occasion Remus might laugh
because James was not the type to ever measure his words, “I mean that life was good lately, great
even. Regulus was finally feeling happier after what happened at Christmas and he was never
going to go back to that house. He was never going to see those people again, and Sirius wasn't
either. We were going to tell Sirius soon and he was going to be mad, but then happy for us.
Everything was perfect and then that bastard had to go off and get himself killed.”

Remus blanched, he couldn't believe James had just said that. He found himself glancing around
the History of Magic classroom, to see if anyone had overheard, but no most of that class was
sleeping and the rest were too far away. Peter sat at the front of the class because he had been the
first student to ever be assigned a seat by the ghostly Professor Binns when he was dared by Sirius
to throw his book through the man.

James had just referred to a dead man as a bastard, out loud for anyone to hear. That was so unlike
James that Remus almost gasped, but that would've just drawn attention to them and that was the
last thing Remus wanted at the moment. He lowered his voice, trying to be as quiet as possible
even though he hadn’t bothered whispering before, “Merlin James, this is not the place to be saying
things like that.”

James snorted and decidedly did not lower his voice as he replied, “Sod off Remus, that's what he
was and you know it. He was a miserable, inbred monster of a person who was witness to his
children's abuse for years without ever saying a word in their defense. Men like him deserve
everything they get in the afterlife, I just wish he didn't share a last name with the two people I
love the most in the world.”

Remus winced at the perpetual insults to the deceased. He wasn't a religious man, but his mother
was and he knew that it wasn't right to speak of the dead that way, no matter the cause. Remus was
a bit surprised to hear James speak of the afterlife himself, as far as he knew, wizards didn't hold
faith in such practices. He couldn’t believe that he had been so involved in his own thoughts and
worries, that he hadn’t even realized how on edge James seemed.

He seemed about one cross comment away from exploding. Remus hoped that no one tried to
speak badly about the Black brothers in front of him today, he had a feeling it wouldn't go well for
them. He couldn't wait till classes were over so they could get away from prying ears.

Remus quickly turned back to the lesson, not wanting James to get more worked up in a class full
of people. Immediately after class, they headed to the headmaster's office, without any discussion
necessary. It had been a strangely quiet day for the Marauders as a whole, but they had managed to
make a plan during lunch to wait for their missing friend outside Dumbledore’s office when classes
finished.

When they got to the seventh floor, they were unsurprised that it was deserted near the
headmaster's office. The gargoyle sat unmoving as they leaned against the wall across from it.
Peter sighed heavily, as he reached into his bag and extracted the map from it, “I solemnly swear
that I am up to no good.”

He scanned the school for their friend but when he didn't find him, he shook his head, “He's not
back yet.”

James groaned before sliding down the wall and staring at the gargoyle with an intense glare.
Merlin, the more time that passed the angrier James seemed to be getting. Remus really hoped they
got back soon, not just because his own nerves were fried, but because he really didn't want to find
out how angry James Potter could get.

“Fuck! What the hell is taking them so long?” James bit out and Peter quickly slid down next to
him, cautiously putting a hand on his shoulder.

Apparently, Peter had weighed his options and decided that James needed his comfort more than
Remus, which was probably the correct choice, but he did sort of wish his friend would put his arm
around him and whisper that everything was fine, as he was doing to James at that very moment.

Remus curled in on himself as Peter attempted to reassure their friend, and all he could think about
was how much he wished Sirius was there. Normally Remus wouldn't feel so needy after only a
day apart, but these were extraneous circumstances. Sirius was undoubtedly feeling overwhelmed
and maybe a little stressed, all Remus wanted to do was envelope him in his arms and never let him
go. Fuck, he wanted Sirius to hold him close so badly at the moment, but he knew that was a
selfish thought when Sirius clearly would need more comfort than him.

Then he heard the most irritating, grating voice break the silence in the hall, “Potter, I should've
guessed.”

Remus was taken aback by the scathing tone and the way the person had practically spit James'
name with venom. Remus looked up expecting to find Snivelous or Mulciber or someone else that
he knew that James had problems with. Instead, he saw two people whom he hadn’t realized James
had ever even spoken to, approaching. It was obvious which one had spoken as he still was glaring
at James, not seeming to notice Remus or Peter. The other hallway inhabitant smiled brightly at the
Marauders as she walked gracefully next to Crouch. Remus would never understand why someone
like Remy Crest would surround herself with someone as psychotic as Barty Crouch.

Remus looked between the two boys who were both glaring at each other with a strange intensity,
he hadn't even realized that James had ever talked to Crouch before.

James’ tone held just as much venom as he responded, apparently all Peter's soothing words had
done nothing to calm him, “Crouch, you can’t imagine how unwelcome your presence is right
now.”

Crouch snorted and rolled his eyes tauntingly, “Oh, how that wounds me coming from such a
cultured and respected member of society. But Jamie dear, I think you are forgetting that Regulus
will want someone here to comfort him when he gets back and I get the feeling you'll be too busy
for him. Luckily, I’ll be here for him while you can’t.”

Remus’s eyes widened slightly at that snipe. Remus hadn’t been aware that Regulus’ friends knew
about James but clearly, they did, and clearly, Crouch didn't like him at all. There was something
about the cruel teasing way he spoke the name Jamie that rubbed Remus the wrong way. Peter and
he didn't even call James that, only Sirius and Effie did that he knew of, but maybe Regulus did too
and that was why Crouch felt so comfortable calling him that.

And Crouch did look comfortable, he was glaring at James, but the smirk on his lips and the way
he confidently spoke, told Remus that he didn't feel threatened by the look on James' face at all. He
had the urge to stand up for his friend, but he also had no idea how to approach the odd intensity
between the two boys.

James was not happy with the snarky comment either and he pushed off the wall and glowered at
Barty, “It's funny that you think he wants your shoulder or your advances of any kind. I think he
already told you he wasn't into that.”

Oh, so that's what this was about. Crouch had made a move on Regulus and James was not happy
about it. Remus didn't know the situation but it's pretty clear that they'd had this discussion before.
He didn’t blame James for his hostility towards Crouch, because honestly if someone had the gall
to hit on Sirius and then rubbed it in his face, he would not be held responsible for his actions, “Oh
Regs and I are just friends, I think he told YOU that already. It's weird that you keep bringing it up,
almost like you can't stop thinking about it. The idea of me and Regs together, possibly in bed,
maybe we’re fu–”

He was cut off as James advanced on him rapidly, not taking that image very well. Remus finally
found his opening to end this disaster as he grabbed James by the shoulder and pulled him away
from Crouch, it was not an easy task. James roughly pulled against Remus, trying to get back to
Crouch and the smug bastard just sat there smirking. Remus held him tight, but that didn't stop
James from yelling, “You fucking tw–”

“Alright let's calm down. I don't see why there's any reason we can't all just wait together and be
pleasant.” Peter spoke rather suddenly as he pushed himself off the wall, inserting himself between
the two boys.

Crouch grinned wickedly and Remus just knew he was not going to like what was said next, “Oh
but Pettigrew, how can we all wait together when Potter doesn't even know which brother he’s
waiting for? What will be their reaction when they both come down those stairs looking for
comfort from him and he freezes, while trying to decide who he loves more.”

Remus grimaced, Crouch really knew how to hit James where it hurt. James’s face flashed with
emotions, but the only one Remus recognized was conflict. Maybe James had been thinking about
that scenario all day? Remus usually would have said, of course, it should be Sirius as he is his
favorite person in the world, but judging by the look on James’s face that might not be true
anymore.

That thought troubles Remus for a number of reasons, one being that James might love Regulus
more than the rest of them, Sirius included. The other is that Sirius was blissfully unaware of that
love even though they'd been together for nearly the entire year. James claims that they are
definitely going to tell him by the end of the year, but as that time closes in, Remus doubts that
more and more.

James’s face is troubled by Crouch's accusation and Remus knows that James is avoiding making
eye contact with him on purpose. Peter might let James get away with almost anything but Remus
would not. He's bloody sick of the excuses James gives. If Regulus comes down those stairs and
James ignores him in favor of Sirius, Remus will know that either the secret is more important to
James, or Sirius is more important. But if Regulus comes down those stairs and James heads for
him first, it will be even worse, because it will mean that James cares about him more than Sirius.
Remus never thought he'd see a day where James cared about anyone more than Sirius and he
hopes that is still the case.

“Barty knock it off. Reg wouldn't like to hear that you're messing with James.” Remy spoke,
knocking the two boys out of their angry staredown. Remus let James go and his friend stocked
over to lean against the wall once more, staring at the gargoyle with renewed intensity.

Surprisingly Barty didn't re-engage with James, instead he just sort of nodded and leaned against a
portion of the wall that was far enough away from James, but still near Remy. Remy smiled at
Remus brightly, “Hi Remus, how are you?”

He couldn't help but smile back at the girl. Remy Crest was one of those people that was difficult
to dislike, unless you tried really hard. She was nice, funny, and cool in a way that made her very
popular. She was friends with a lot of people, and it didn't seem to matter to her what house they
were in at all. In fact, she hung out with Regulus and Crouch more than anyone and they were from
the house that was the most biased against her and her blood status.

Remus was very glad that she had come with Crouch because he had a feeling that if she wasn't
here, that little argument would've ended very differently. Remus was a tad surprised that Barty
listened to her in the first place because the rumor was, that he didn't listen to anyone.

“I’m okay. How about you, Remy?” Remus quickly lied and deflected the question back to her.

“Well, I would be better if Regulus was here. I can't believe that they’ve been gone all day.”

Remus could relate wholeheartedly. Peter spoke to the girl next, and Remus wondered if the two of
them had ever spoken before. Sirius and he knew her because they spent their fair share of time
down at the greenhouses, but Peter never went down there for that. “It's ridiculous. They've been
gone since eight, nothing should be taking this long. I can't believe no one has even bothered to
update us since this morning.”

Remy nodded in clear agreeance about to respond, when a loud sound spread through the corridor,
the sound of stone dragging against stone. They turned to see the gargoyle finally moving and
collectively they all crowded around the entrance. Remus really hoped it was the Black brothers, or
this would be very awkward.

It was the brothers as it turned out, Sirius led them out of the small alcove where they seemed
surprised by the gathering of people. Sirius looked, he looked like a cold glass of water to a man in
the desert who was dying of thirst. Remus drank the sight of his boyfriend in, he looked exhausted
but so god damn beautiful.

Sirius’s eyes locked in on his own immediately and within seconds they were embracing. Remus
wasn't sure whether he had moved or Sirius had, maybe they had met in the middle. Either way he
was here, with Remus, and it felt as if he could breathe again. He breathed in Sirius' scent deeply,
memorizing the woodsy musk that always drove Remus crazy.
He only saw it because he happened to glance over Sirius's shoulder, otherwise, he would've
missed the intensity of the moment altogether. James had apparently decided to use Sirius’ turned-
back to his advantage, or he couldn't help himself, Remus wasn't sure. The look in James’s eyes as
they locked with Regulus’s, made Remus vaguely uncomfortable. It was such an intimate moment
to be taking place in the middle of a corridor filled with people. It was the type of moment that
should take place in private.

They were close, their fingers just touching, not saying anything, but their eyes spoke to each other
in volumes. Sirius pulled back which promptly ended that odd intensity the two boys had shared.
Remus actually felt a little bad for Regulus as James embraced Sirius in front of him, without them
being able to share the same.

Sirius then hugged Peter tightly, “Thanks for waiting for me, guys.”

James plastered a fake grin on his face, but not without glancing at Regulus once more, “No
problem Pads, it was too quiet without you today, and I…..”

James trailed off as Regulus and his friends shuffled past them, moving down the corridor. Sirius
didn't seem to notice James’s verbal affliction as he only allowed his brother to get a few meters
away before calling out, “Reggie!”

Regulus turned back slowly, his face held this haunted look that Remus hadn’t noticed when they
had first come down the stairs, to be fair he had been a little distracted. Sirius asked in a mock
cheerful tone, “Are you gonna be okay?”

Regulus, who was a lot more like his brother than either of them would admit, plastered his own
mock reassuring smile on his face, “Yeah I’ll be fine.”

His eyes flickered to James once, and Remus was shocked by the blatant depression James’s face
held for a moment before he covered it up once more. Crouch must have seen it though, he smirked
at James and threw his arm around Regulus as the trio continued down the hall.

********************************************************

When they got back into the dorm they each settled in to listen to Sirius speak. Remus’s heart felt
so much lighter having Sirius next to him. He had known he would feel better when he could
visibly see that his love wasn't harmed, but he couldn't have guessed the amount of relief he would
feel.

Remus leaned closer to Sirius to take a deep breath of his scent, not caring if anyone found it odd as
it calmed him. Sirius wrung out his hands nervously before clearing his throat, “My father died,
which obviously you knew, I was at his estate and will reading this morning.” He glanced at
Remus as if asking if they knew this already, Remus nodded indicating that they had known,
“Reggie and I thought that they were just making us go because we were the closest relatives and
even though we were disowned, the Ministry doesn't really recognize pureblood law.”

Sirius trailed off a bit as if he was lost in thought and Peter quickly refocused him by asking, “But
that wasn't the case?”

Sirius snapped back to attention, shaking his head, “No, we got there and they were all there, the
whole rotten lot. Almost immediately our mother started cursing at us, Regulus specifically, but
luckily they had security silence her for the rest of the reading. That didn't stop the snide comments
and looks we got from everyone else though. Merlin that was nothing compared to when they
found out the old man had actually left me and Reggie something.”

Remus felt his eyes widen and a quick glance at Peter told him that he was started as well. Sirius
smirked sardonically at their shocked expressions, “Yeah that was pretty much my reaction too.
Believe it or not, the old man left me one of the family cottages and a yearly allowance. The family
went fucking mad about it.”

Sirius laughed as if remembering their reactions, but it was a cruel cold laugh that Remus hated,
“Can you believe it? A fucking house. I don't have to work a day in my life if I don't want to, the
old man saw to that.” He turned towards Remus, his expression lightening a little, “We can live
there, and even if we can't find jobs right away, we'll be fine, Moony. I promised you a future and
here it is.”

Remus wasn't sure how to react to that. He had always known that all the future plans Sirius and he
made were fruitless, he had made peace with it. But now? Now Sirius was telling him that it was
possible, everything that they had dreamed of was possible. He could hardly catch his breath with
how quickly it had all happened. He still didn't know how he felt about living in a place that used
to be a Black residence, but he supposed if Sirius was okay with it then he should be too. Sirius
seemed okay with it, didn’t he?

Peter found words sooner than Remus did, “Congratulations Pads, that's great news!”

Remus fumbled to find words, “Yeah I–”

Apparently, he didn't have to find the words anyways because James finally entered the
conversation from his place on his bed, farther away than he normally would sit, “And what did he
leave Reggie?”

Sirius’s eyes flickered from Remus and settled on James, looking a bit surprised, either at the
interruption or at the use of his own nickname for his brother. A glance at James told Remus that
James’ ire from earlier hadn’t settled down in the slightest, it was just on the back burner for his
relief at seeing Sirius. He looked a bit mad if Remus was honest, his expression wild.

The surprise on Sirius’s face soon slid into an expression of mock humor, Remus could tell it
wasn't genuine from the severe and unnatural twist of his lips, he barked out a cold laugh, “Oh
right! To my dearest baby brother, Orion Black bequeaths the heirdom in full! It's his responsibility
to manage the family name and fortunes!”

He continued to laugh and Remus felt a little queasy from the hostility of it, “Can you believe that?
He left a fifteen-year-old in charge of everything!”

Remus was too focused on Sirius to notice James standing up from the bed until Peter spoke again,
“James, what are you doing?”

James didn't answer, his expression full of emotion as he strode to the door. Sirius noticed his
friend's odd behavior, “James! James, what's going on?”

Sirius’ voice made James pause and turn around, faking a tense smile, “Sorry Pads, I'm so glad
your back. And really I'm happy that you got a house, but I need to go now. I'll be back later.”

With that he left the room, with Peter running after him, calling his name. That left Sirius and
Remus to themselves. Sirius still seemed perplexed at the odd behavior, “What was that about?
That's not like James.”

Remus sighed, getting really sick of covering for James, “He was really worried about you today,
we all were. But I think that maybe he's just feeling a little overwhelmed and needs some time to
himself.”

Sirius nodded, completely understanding and Remus’s heart clenched at knowing James was on his
way to see Regulus behind his best friend's back. “I'm sorry you guys were so worried today. I
admit I wasn't with it enough when McGonagall came to the table this morning to reassure you and
I'm really sorry about that.”

“No baby, you didn't need to reassure us. You had enough on your mind, I definitely didn't want to
make you worry for me on top of that.”

Sirius smiled softly, the cold edges of his face seeming to drift away, “I'll always worry about you,
Moony.”

Remus’s stomach fluttered at the sincerity in his tone, Merlin, he loved him so much. That's why
the day had been so hard without him there, with Sirius somewhere that Remus knew wasn't safe.
Remus leaned into Sirius and wrapped his arm around him, pulling him close, “ How are you Pads?
Really?”

Sirius sighed but spoke softly only a few seconds later, “I think I'm alright. I mean I'm completely
fine, but also I feel sort of weird, I don't know.” Sirius paused for a moment, leaning closer into
Remus if that was possible, “I mean he was a terrible person that let a lot of bad things happen to
me and Reg. And then he goes and leaves me a house and money and just changes our lives. I'm
still not sure why he did it. Regulus says it's because I was his favorite, but I don't know if that's
true.”

“Why do you think that's not true?”

“No valid reason really. It's just a feeling I have, you know? I spent most of my life believing that
he hated that I wasn't posh and obedient like Regulus and it's just hard to imagine that throughout
that whole time he preferred me, you know?”

Remus nodded, “That's understandable, did Regulus say why he thought that?”

Sirius snorted and Remus was surprised by the sound but didn’t have much time to ponder it before
Sirius began full-on laughing. He was probably staring at him like he was crazy because when
Sirius met his eyes he calmed down enough to explain his amusement, “Yeah he said that he loved
me. That the old man loved me but didn't feel like he could show it before he died, because of our
mother.”

Remus thought that it wasn't the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard. A spineless man afraid of
his wife, who loved his children, but didn't want to face his wife's wrath. So he waited to defy her
till she could no longer reach him.

Sirius continued speaking before Remus could respond, “The shitty part of all this is, even if it is
true, which I highly doubt, Reg doesn't think he received the heirdom for the same reason.”

Remus furrowed his eyebrows, not quite understanding, “What do you mean?”

“Regulus is under the impression that our father knew more about us than he let on. I don't know
how that would be possible since he hardly even spoke to us. Regulus is pretty sure that our father
knew a really big secret about him and that is why he left him the heirdom.”

“What? What kind of secret would make him do that?”

Sirius looked at Remus for a long contemplative moment, “Okay I’ll tell you, but only because I
know you won't tell anyone else.” He waited for Remus to nod in agreement before continuing,
“Regulus has a boyfriend and he thinks our father knew.”

Remus’s heart stopped. What the fuck? He stuttered, “Wait s-so he t-told you that? Did he t-tell
you who?”

Sirius shook his head glumly, “No he didn't tell me who, but I also didn't ask. It felt private, you
know? Maybe I'll ask him later or he’ll tell me when he's comfortable enough.”

Remus was surprised at how much Sirius was respecting Regulus’s privacy, it didn't really seem
natural to him. Considering how bitter he got when he spoke of James’s secret boyfriend, Bunny.
He was also surprised that Regulus had told Sirius this, but he found that it lightened his emotional
load substantially. Soon he wouldn't have to feel this enormous guilt every day because he was
keeping this secret from his boyfriend, because this meant that they were going to tell Sirius soon,
really soon.

“We actually had a nice brother moment surprisingly. Then he told me that he thinks that our father
made him heir so that he would be forced to be straight and procreate to continue the family line.”

Shit, that was fucking demented. “And what do you think?”

“I think, I think that if he was angry at Regulus for being gay then he wouldn't have left anything to
his other son who has a very public relationship with another man. I think that it's more likely to be
revenge for him pressing charges against them.”

Remus hadn’t even thought of that, in fact, he had sort of forgotten that long before Orion Black's
death, the Black family was in the papers for a completely different reason. “Youngest Black son
calls abuse” was one of the headlines Remus remembered specifically, mostly because the article
inferred that Regulus was lying and that made him angry.

“Do you really think that he would turn everything over to him because he wanted revenge?”

Sirius ran a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated which made Remus feel bad. Sirius had
probably been running all the possibilities through his head, but hadn’t really had time to think
about it properly, “I think that father was angry that Regulus shamed the Black name the way he
did. I think when he was evaluating his options for an heir, he let the bitterness get the best of him.
I think he probably thought that it was Regulus’s grave, he could lie in it. I think he wanted to
punish Regulus and thought what better way than to saddle him with a family known for abuse and
death eaters. He'd probably be having a good laugh about it now.”

“That's a rather crude thought.”

Sirius groaned, “Trust me I know. I'd like to believe that he left him the heirdom just because he
knew that he would be the best at the job because honestly he probably would be but it just doesn't
seem right. He left a fifteen-year-old to take care of a generational line that extends centuries back.
He left money to everyone important just in case Regulus refused to provide for them, which is
bizarre for pureblood families and he wrote him a death letter that said “It's all on you now”. How
am I supposed to believe it was anything but revenge?”

Remus wasn't sure, because Sirius was right it certainly seemed possible. Remus could be a cynic,
he knew that, but still he had trouble understanding how a man could saddle his young son with so
much power and legacy without knowing he'd probably break under it, “But he wouldn't have
known that he'd die anytime soon. It was an accident, he wouldn't have known he'd saddle Regulus
with all of this so young.”

Remus had thought that his rationale made perfect sense, but Sirius just waved his hand
dismissively, “He probably guessed that it would be soon, with the war and everything. If he
wanted to change it later he could've, if he survived the war that is.”

Remus was stumped, Sirius was probably right, “Well fuck.”

Sirius closed his eyes briefly before opening them again slowly, “Yeah, fuck. Fuck him. Fuck him
and his ideals.”

***************************************************

James

“James!” Peter shouted for him as James continued down to the common room. James didn't stop
for him and Peter only caught up with him once they were out in the corridors. He grabbed James
by the arm forcing him to stop.

James tried to yank his arm back, but Peter could be surprisingly strong when he tried. He turned
around to glare at his friend, “What?”

Peter huffed, clearly not happy about being forced to run after James the way he had, not that
James felt pity for his friend because he certainly hadn’t forced him to do it. “Where do you plan
on going, James? To Regulus? Because I'm pretty sure he's got enough on his plate to deal with,
without you adding your weird behavior to it.”

James scoffed, annoyed with his friend, “Since when do you care about Regulus. Besides, I'm not
going to stress him out, I'm going to help comfort him.”

“And what about Sirius? Who you are supposed to be comforting right now. And it's not that I care
about him, but I think that you are just going to make things worse and he shouldn't have to deal
with that when his father just died.”

“His father was an asshole, who allowed him to be abused his whole life. I seriously doubt he is
mourning him right now.”

Peter frowned at James’ flippancy, “I don't know if that's true, I mean Sirius seems a little off about
this whole thing, so Regulus could be feeling the same way.”

James rolled his eyes, “What are you talking about Pete? Sirius was fine and Regulus was fine too.
At least with their dad's death, but I know he must be freaking out about everything else. That's
why I need to go to him, so let go of me.”

James made another attempt to pull his arm free and this time he was successful. He began striding
down to the dungeons. Peter did not leave him and his voice became raised as he spoke next, which
was very unlike Peter, “You can not go down there like this James. You're acting fucking manic.
What the hell is wrong with you today?”

“Nothing is wrong with me.” James gritted out, probably proving his friend's point, but James
couldn't care less at the moment.

Now it was Peter's turn to scoff, “Right, you're just acting like a fucking hothead for no reason at
all.”

James was getting really sick of being grilled by his supposed friend, so he turned to him and
gritted out, “Did you ever think that maybe I'm a tad irritable because two of the most important
people in my life were surrounded by the people who abused and mistreated them all their lives.
Yeah, it's a real fucking mystery why I’m like this.”

Peter did not look surprised, which made James even more annoyed as he began walking again,
quickening his pace, “I get that James, I mean, Remus and I have been worried about Sirius all day
too, but you don't see us biting off people's heads every chance we get either.”

“It is not the same.“ James punctuated each word tersely.

“It is.” Peter insisted, “At least for Remus it is, he was acting weird all day too, but he wasn't taking
it out on anyone. I understand that you are upset and that you want to be with Regulus, but before
you do that, I really think that you should take some time to cool off because when you see him it
is not going to be about you. It's going to be about him and his problems and he shouldn't have to
put that on hold to deal with your feelings.”

That stopped James in his tracks, fuck was he being selfish? Peter seemed convinced that James
would just upset Regulus if he went to him right now, the last thing he wanted was to upset Reggie.

James was at a standstill, still angry, but unsure what to say now, since Peter's reluctance to let him
go made sense. Luckily, Peter spoke again, saving James from responding for another moment,
“But the good news is you have a friend right here to help you deal with your feelings. You can
talk to me and when you feel better, I will let you go visit Regulus, without disrupting you at all.”
James did not want to talk, he just wanted to see Reggie, to hold Reggie. The idea of Barty being
the one to comfort his boyfriend made him physically ill. He had wanted to punch the superior
smirk on Crouch’s smug face earlier. Wanted to choke him when he put his arm around Regulus’s
shoulders. He supposed that's what Peter was referring to when he spoke of James' anger.

He was angry, but he honestly had no idea why. It was like a cool rage had been slowly burning
him up from the inside since this morning. Ever since he read that headline, he had felt it. He had
felt it when Sirius had left and when he couldn't find Regulus in the Great Hall. He felt it with each
passing class that Sirius wasn't beside him and with the knowledge that if he looked at the map,
Regulus' name wouldn’t be there. He felt it every time he heard someone whispering about the
Black family, thinking the Marauders couldn’t hear.

“I can't just abandon Regulus, Peter. He needs me.”

“Sirius needs you too, but I guess you are fine with abandoning him.”

He wasn't fine with that, not really. “He has you two, he has all the support he needs.”

Peter let out a sharp humorless laugh, “And what do you call the friends that waited outside the
office with us for Regulus. Wouldn't you say that he has plenty of people comforting him now or at
least just as much as Sirius?”

James didn't appreciate Peter mentioning Crouch comforting Regulus, it did not help his mood, “If
I want your help. then I'll fucking ask for it, Wormtail.”

With those parting words James strode off, Peter didn't follow this time, making James wonder if
had hurt his friend's feelings. Either way, as rude as he had been, it had worked in his favor
because soon he was storming into the dungeons without a tag along beside him. He stared at the
entrance to the common room, wishing he had brought his cloak with him, but he hadn’t so he had
no clue how to get in.

He supposed luck was on his side because, after only ten minutes of waiting, Remy Crest walked
out of the door. She seemed surprised to see James, but she quickly moved on and smiled softly at
him, “Here to see Reg, are you?”

James just nodded and she whispered the password. He said nothing as he slid through the
opening. Luckily, there were only a few people in the common room and they didn't seem to notice
him as he stormed by and headed to Regulus’ room.

When he walked into Regulus’ room, he found his boyfriend and Crouch talking quietly, but when
they noticed him enter, they both stopped their conversation. Crouch glared at him and James
glared back, but then his eyes shifted to Regulus’ expression and stayed glued to those haunted
gray eyes until Regulus spoke, “Barty, leave please.”

Crouch grumbled under his breath but left without much complaint, much to James’ surprise. As
James stared at Regulus he felt his anger waiver, because here he was, his beautiful boyfriend alive
and well. The fear and anger he had felt all day seemed to dissipate at the sight of him.

Regulus spoke first, his voice a little shaky, “Did you walk through the common room like that?”

James nodded, not caring much if anyone had seen him or not, “Yeah.”

Regulus didn't speak as James slowly moved closer as if he was approaching a spooked horse. He
tried to make his voice come out reassuring when he spoke next, “Are you okay?”

Regulus let out a shaky breath, an attempt to look calm. It might have worked but his face crumpled
in distress almost immediately, “No.”

James abandoned all pretenses of approaching him slowly, as he closed in and hugged his
boyfriend in one fluid swoop, “Oh baby, I am so sorry I wasn't there. I should've been there. I'm
sorry, I am so sorry.”

Regulus let out a sound of distress as he buried his face in James's chest. James could feel hot
erratic breaths through his thin shirt and he tightened his hold, “Don’t be silly, James.”

“Why don't you tell me about it?”

Regulus’ voice was muffled as he spoke, “Didn't Sirius already tell you all about it?”

“Yes, he did. But I want to hear about it from you, Bunny.”

Regulus let out a tearless sob, “It was torture, James. Even if you could've been there it would've
been just as bad. Merlin, the way they were looking at me.” He shivered slightly, “It was like I was
a gazelle that wandered into a pride of lions.”

James didn't speak or try to interrupt, even though he desperately wanted to whisper how brave he
thought Regulus was, into his ear. Instead, he listened as Regulus recounted how terrible he had
felt throughout the day, and all James could do was clench his eyes shut and try to stay calm for
Regulus’ sake.

“It-It was just like Christmas dinner all over again. They were all there, all of them. Even with my
mother silenced I could still tell what she was saying, with the looks she was giving me, that they
were all giving me. They all despise me, even more than they do Sirius. Bellatrix and Druella were
being cruel as usual, but it was so much more on the nose, and as much as I hate to admit it, it hurt
James. And Cygnus looked at me as if I was the scum at the bottom of his shoes. They were so
angry when they found out he had left it to me.”

James spoke after a long moment of silence, “I'm so sorry, baby. You are so brave. Are you feeling
any better now that you are back at Hogwarts?”

Regulus shook his head, and James’s heart sank for the boy in his lap. James felt so much better
with him here, but apparently, he didn't provide the same amount of comfort and that made him
very sad.

Regulus spoke after a minute of silence, with a heavy breath to start, “It's just, ever since I woke up
this morning, I've had a terrible feeling in my stomach. It felt like something dreadful was going to
happen, like something life-changingly bad. Then my father died and I found out about it before I
had even had time to get dressed for the day.”

James felt a little silly asking, but he had to know, “Are you sad that he died?”

Regulus looked a tad surprised by the question, but he seemed to be giving it serious thought, as he
didn't speak for a while, “No, I don't think I am. Maybe if I was still the same person as I was at
the start of the school year then yeah, but I'm not. He never really did anything for me, you know?
If he was ever a father to either of his sons then it was Sirius, and even that would be a stretch.”

James had been so sure he knew Regulus' feelings on his father's death, and he was right, but it
didn't feel good to be right this time. He couldn’t help but compare all the great memories he had
with his own father, to the ones he had heard from the Black brothers. Regulus had almost none,
and the few Sirius possessed never included Reg. “But he left you the heirdom, right? He chose to
leave it to you, not Sirius, even though you both were disowned, that's gotta mean something?”

Regulus snorted, but it was masked slightly by James's chest, “Maybe it would, if I hadnt already
read his stupid letter. That pretty much got rid of any delusions I had about our relationship.”

James tilted his head down to look at Regulus, genuinely curious, “You got a death letter?”

Death letters weren't all that common anymore, mostly because no one really knew the age that
they would die, and writing a letter that wouldn't be delivered for fifty more years seemed
ridiculous. Wizards could live a long time and most felt that they had said all they needed to by the
time they died. Plus you could only write one letter, though it could be sent to multiple people.

Regulus nodded, his eyes going hazy and James knew he was on the verge of tears, “Do you wanna
know what it said?” He hardly took a breath before he continued, not waiting for James to respond,
“It said “It's all on you now”. Can you believe that? Merlin, could he be any more transparent?”

“What do you mean? It didn't say anything else?” James would probably be annoyed if he got a
vague death letter like that too, but he didn't see how Regulus would be able to tell his father's
feelings for him from it.

Regulus scoffed, as if James was being particularly dim, “No, it didn't say anything else. It's
obvious what it means, isn't it?”

James shrugged, pulling back slightly to look at Regulus, “Not to me, but I'm not exactly a genius
like you either.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, disregarding James’ attempt to lighten his boyfriend's mood. His eyes were
brimming with tears, just waiting to tip over the edge, “It's obvious, that he hated me.”

James’s heart dropped, the idea that anyone could hate this beautiful boy was blasphemy, “Reg I-”

The tears spilled down his pale cheeks and more continued to follow until they were streaming
down his face, “What other reason could there be? He hated me and he wanted to take the one
thing that brings me joy away from me.”
“What do you mean? What is he taking away from you?”

Regulus clenched his eyes shut before answering in a strained voice, “My freedom. The freedom to
be who I want, to choose who I want. It's not fair, I only had it for a few months. I didn't even really
get to do anything with it. I just saved it, holding that freedom tight, cherishing it, and now it's
gone. It's gone because he stole it from me, just like mother and he did to everything else that I
loved.”

James felt his heart breaking, it hurt so badly to hear Regulus talk like this. He tried, he really tried
to help but it was as if the boy couldn't hear him, “Baby, you are free. You can still do anything
you want. You are no longer trapped by them. You don't have to do anything that they expect from
you.”

“Free? Free to continue the legacy I tried to escape. To marry some woman and make the perfect
heir, so that he can make the perfect heir, and so on. To manage the finances to make my rich
family even richer, those riches which will sit in a vault never to be used for anything other than
the family gain. To make my family seem so much more superior than those silly families with
their empty vaults and their happy children. Why would anyone want that plebeian future?”

James’s heart stuttered to a stop, he didn't process the information as quickly as he should've, but
who could blame him? The man he loved just told him that he would marry a woman.

“What?” He asked as slowly as the sludge in his throat would allow. It physically pained him to
speak, even though he was perfectly healthy.

Regulus didn't seem to process James’s question, seeming to be talking to himself now, “No, I'm
not free, far from it. If I were free I would be able to choose my own path, my own life, and my
own love. Instead, I get saddled with a pre-planned future, one that I already thought I had escaped.
It’s hard to even imagine myself living the life I had planned for most of my life. Hard to imagine
being surrounded with those people again, I–”

James couldn't stop himself, even though he knew Regulus probably needed to vent. He needed an
answer to his question, desperately. Had he imagined it? Had Regulus really said he would marry a
woman and produce an heir? “What did you say?”

Regulus stopped suddenly, the tears still slowly pouring from his eyes, he blinked confusingly up
at James, “What?”
James’ voice came out as steady as he could manage and he punctuated his words as he spoke
them, “Did you say you would marry a woman?”

Regulus nodded, looking at James a little wearily. James couldn't comprehend what he was
hearing, “B-but y-your gay!”

Regulus’s eyes widened, but his voice came out firm with his reply, “Well I need to produce an
heir, James. I’ll probably have to marry a woman to do that.”

The anger and fear James had felt all day, erupted to the surface, he stood up and Regulus just
managed to slip to the bed before he was dumped unceremoniously off his lap. James whipped
back at Regulus who was staring at him open-mouthed, from his position on the bed, “Are you
fucking kidding me? You're gay! You can't marry a woman!”

Regulus stood up and shot a teary glare at James, “I wouldn't be the first heir that preferred the
company of a man, James. That's why people take mistresses or misters, you know?”

“You don't have to marry a woman to have a kid. There are a million options without going that far.
You can hire a surrogate an–”

“A surrogate? Do you know how rare those with magic are? It would be nearly impossible to find
one.”

“Well, it would be better to look before you doom yourself to a marriage with someone you can't
even get it up for.” James practically spat at him, he couldn't believe that Regulus was acting this
way.

“There are potions for that, besides you don't even necessarily have to have sex to get someone
pregnant. Maybe the woman would prefer that anyways, we could be married but each has
someone to satisfy us.”

James let out a cruel snort, and he could see by the look of pain on Regulus’s face that it had hurt,
“Or you could not get married to some bird that you will never love. Instead, you could live the
life you want to live. You could marry someone you actually want to and if you want to have a kid,
then it's because you want to, not because of some obligation you have to your bloodline.”
Regulus looked broken, his tear-soaked face and bloodshot eyes were wild with something that
looked like fear, “Do you really think that I don't want that? Of course, I want that James. I thought
that once I left, then everything would fall into place and it did for a while. But now I'm being
dragged back into it all and as much as I want to grip onto you like a life preserver, I can't drag you
into it. I can't be the one to end the Black line, I just can't. It was fine when I thought my parents
would have to make that decision, but now that it's falling to me, I can't take the guilt of letting my
ancestors down.”

James hadn't realized that he had tears streaming down his own face, until he tasted the saltiness on
his lips, “And what about me? You are fine with letting me down?”

“James, that’s not fair.”

“How isn't it? Where do you imagine me when you go off to marry this girl and have this heir? Do
you imagine I would just wait around and be your mistress? Or do you not even imagine me there
at all?”

Regulus ran his hands through his hair, roughly, “I just found out about this a few hours ago. I
haven't had time to make up little fantasies about everything, James. You can–”

“What about before then? We were dating before you left your family, what did you imagine then?
Did you imagine that I was just a fling that you could end whenever you wanted? Was I a fling to
you? While I was falling in love with you, we were considering all the ways you could break up
with me when you got bored of your little experiment.”

Regulus looked as if he had been slapped across the face, “No, of course you weren't James. Are
you kidding me? I think I just stopped myself from considering a future back then, because I was
falling in love with you too. I didn't want to consider a future without you, so I didn't.”

James let out a shaky breath, he felt so ridiculously unsteady right now. In the calmest voice he
could manage, he asked, “And now? How do you feel now Regulus? Do you still not want to
imagine a future without me? Because the very last thing I can imagine is a future without you. I
want to live together in a house of our own. I want to spend all my life waking up with you beside
me. I want to dance with you at OUR wedding. I want you to be the father of MY children. I want
to get wrinkles and gray hair with you by my side. I want it all, Regulus. I don't want to settle for
sharing you with anyone. The fact that you don't feel the same kills me.”
Regulus’ facade crumbles and within seconds he's in James’s arms, his face pressed to James's
neck, as he whispers, “I do, James. Merlin, you have no idea, I want that, all of that. I want to be by
your side for it all too. Please, never say that I don't want that because I do, so badly. I love you so
much it hurts, nounours .”

James struggled to steady his breath, as he breathed in the smell of Regulus’s shampoo. As good as
it felt to hear that, it still didn't clear James’s mind. They stood there for a minute, maybe two, just
embracing each other the way they both needed to, so badly. James was the first one to break the
blessed peace, “So if that's all true, then please I'm begging you, don't make your life choices
because of them.”

Regulus pulled back from the hug, he moved his hand softly to caress James’s face, “Okay, I
promise. I haven't made any decisions yet, I just needed a little time to freak out, okay?”

James nodded, not feeling much better than he had before. What he wanted Regulus to say was that
he wouldn't do any of that. That it was a cruel joke and that he fully planned to have the future
James was envisioning. That he wouldn't even talk to those people again, instead he had deflected,
once again.

James wasn't quite sure when it had happened, it seemed as if everything was moving around him
in a blur, but soon they were both sprawled out in Regulus’s bed. Regulus was lying on James’s
chest, while James ran his hand through his boyfriend's hair softly. It was a nice moment and
James would probably cherish it forever, but it didn't change what they had just discussed. Just
because they had called a truce on the fight, didn't erase everything that was said. Regulus still was
considering a future without James and it destroyed him inside.

He wanted to scream and stomp his feet, and have a full-on tantrum like a child, but instead, he sat
quietly with his love while his mind dove into chaos. He kept seeing images of Regulus married to
a pretty blonde girl who held their child in her arms. The worst part was, that Regulus looked
happy. He looked as if he belonged in that family, with them, instead of with James.

James couldn't get the picture out of his head, it haunted him throughout the entire time they lied
together. He stayed for nearly three hours, while they sat there in silence, before he finally decided
to go back to check on Sirius.

He kissed Regulus lightly before saying goodbye, he was almost to the door when Regulus called
out to him, “James, are we okay?”

James held back a grimace at the question, and then he did something he almost never did to
Regulus, he lied, “Yeah we're okay, Reg.”

Then he left.

As he walked through the common room, he noticed that it had filled up quite a bit since he had
first entered. He ignored the questions that were thrown his way and rushed out of the room.
Sitting across from the Slytherin entrance with a book in his lap was Peter.

Peter stood up when he saw James exit and neither of them said anything. James didn't know how
he had held in everything while he laid with Regulus, but as soon as he saw his friend he couldn't
hold it in any longer. Tears burst from his eyes and he rushed forward enveloping Peter in a
crushing hug, he soon was sobbing into his friend's shoulder.

Peter cooed to him quietly, stroking his hair softly as they hugged, “Hey it's okay. It's okay James.”

James sobbed, right there in front of the Slytherin common room, for anyone to see. Peter must
have guessed that might be a problem because soon he was guiding James down the hall towards
the potions classroom, which would be abandoned at this time of night.

Even in the quiet of the classroom, James cried, he cried for every word Regulus had said tonight.
The ones that hurt him, the ones that scared him, and the ones that killed him inside.

“I- I'm sorry Wormy. “James sniffled, feeling like a small child but unable to stop himself, “I'm
sorry I yelled at you, it wasn't right. You didn't deserve that.”

Peter smiled softly at him, “Thank you. Now, why don't you tell me how it went.”

James buried his head in his hands, “Terrible, it went fucking terrible. I was so relieved to see him,
but I just didn't understand how much everything had changed in one afternoon.”

Peter tilted his head, in confusion, “What do you mean?”

James suddenly stood up and couldn't help but start pacing in front of his friend, “I mean before
today I had all these visions of our future, but now they might never happen.” James looked down
at Peter, who had taken a seat on a nearby desk, his voice raised, “He believes that as the heir, it is
now his responsibility to continue the family legacy in all its entirety.”

“What? Marry his cousin and beat his kids?”

James felt the internal rage he held rise to the surface, he slammed his hand down on a nearby
desk, “Fuck! How could he fucking do this to me?”

Peter looked concerned as he asked, “What did he do to you?”

James whipped an incredulous look at his friend, “What have you haven't guessed yet? He's
planning on marrying some pureblood witch and having just enough sex to provide an heir. Then
he will have a mistress on the side! Can you fucking believe that?”

Peter looked as surprised as James had felt the moment he had heard the idea too, “He says that
nothing's final yet, but just the fact that he's considering that kind of life, terrifies me. I was so
upset and I yelled at him, but he just didn't get it!”

“He didn't understand why you were upset?” Peter asked incredulously.

James threw his hands up in exasperation, “No! He didn't understand why I was so scared of him
getting sucked back into that family. He didn’t understand that it scared me so much because it felt
exactly like last time.” James felt as if he was going insane as he ran his fingers through his hair
roughly, pulling at the ends, “Before Christmas, I had begged him not to go. I literally pleaded with
him to stay with me, but he told me I was being silly. Only he didn't realize that looking at him in
that hospital bed, when he looked as if he was dead, was the scariest moment of my life. I had
literally thought he was dead right away, Peter. And now he wants to just walk back into that
family, that house.”

Peter listened patiently as James ranted. He listened for what felt like hours and it really might’ve
been, because by the time James ran out of steam, his voice was hoarse. Peter just sat there
listening until James cried all the tears he could and yelled all he could manage.

In the end, Peter just engulfed him in another hug and James melted into it, just like he had the first
one. His voice came out raspy as he asked, his head still buried in Peter's shoulder, “What am I
going to do, Pete?”
Peter spoke in a confident but soft voice and James immediately decided that whatever his friend
said, he would listen. James was a fucking mess right now and Peter was the most put-together
person he knew. “You are going to continue your life, James. Regulus said he didn't make any
decisions yet, so it doesn't do you any good to jump to conclusions. He's going to make whatever
decisions he wants and as much as you want to be the one to tell them they're a bad idea, you can't
be. This is the type of thing he needs to get through and make decisions on his own. Just like how
you need to do what's best for yourself, okay? So no more agonizing over what he's going to do,
you need to think about yourself for once, James. As hard as that might be, you need to be there for
yourself.”

“You mean like I shouldn't comfort Sirius or him if they need it?”

Peter pulled back and shook his head, “No, of course you can. You can still be the kind and caring
person you are, but you need to put yourself first for once in your life, okay? Can you do that?”

James thought about it, could he do that? All his life he had been putting others ahead of himself.
His mother and father, the Marauders, the girls, the quidditch team, and now Regulus Black. He
wasn't sure he could just change his entire philosophy on life just like that, but he decided it was
time to try.

From now on he would put himself first and he wouldn’t let himself become too involved in
anyone else's decisions. It was time he focused on his own life for once.
 My Best friend's Seeker
Chapter Notes

Hey everyone! I know this was a long wait, but thanks for being so patient. I actually
ended up changing my plan for this chapter a few times, so it took me a little longer
than usual to find something that I liked and that fit with the storyline. I just want to
warn you that I have a character that was introduced in chapter 11, in case you don't
remember him. Thanks for reading my story and I am thrilled that so many people
seem to like it. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Peter

Peter awoke to the sound of someone doing jumping jacks? Or push-ups maybe? He wasn't quite
sure because the curtain around his bed was firmly shut. James, he guessed, considering his other
two roommates were known to lie in bed all day when they had the chance.

It was the morning of the quidditch finals today, with Gryffindor and Slytherin so James was
bound to be anxious. Hell, he got game day anxiety every game day and the practice days leading
up to the game day, and when he was strategizing for the game. This game was important to
James, more than any other ones they had played this season. This game would determine who
won the house cup and as it was James’ first year as captain, he wanted to win badly.

James had actually taken his advice and given Regulus a little space after the death of Orion Black.
He put the ball in Regulus’s court for how much they would see each other, as far as Pete could
tell, it hadn't been very often in the last month. Peter knew that it had been driving James crazy not
to be with Regulus more, but Peter was so proud of him for being strong enough to stop himself
from seeking out the Slytherin. Of course, James was still guilty of stalking Regulus a bit, but Peter
thought that that behavior could be excused.

James had gone full stalker mode when it came to Regulus. He had already known Regulus’
schedule, but now he went out of his way to make sure ended up in the same hallway as Regulus
did, even if it was out of the way of his own class. He had been religiously watching Regulus’ dot
on the map, for what reason Peter didn't know, the boy mostly sat in the common room when he
wasn't in class or at practice.

Even given James’ stalker tendencies, Peter was proud of his friend. James had been genuinely
focusing on himself for the last month. He spent the majority of his time on quidditch, but a good
amount on his school work as well. Even though he was no longer partaking in the “tutoring”
sessions he had before, he was studying pretty well on his own. Of course an unoccupied James
meant that he had also been convincing the rest of them to pull as many pranks as possible before
school ended, which they happily obliged.

Yes, it was no surprise that James was up so early on game day, though Peter wasn't quite sure
what time it was yet, the game wasn't until this afternoon. Peter could just see the sun through his
bed curtains which meant it was still pretty early in the morning.

A muffled groan reached his ears as Magdalene snuggled into his chest. He looked down to see her
looking back at him, she must've woken up at the same time as him. Her long dark hair cascaded
around her face and her pretty brown hers made her look angelic. It was a thought Peter had nearly
every morning they woke up together, Magdalene Reese was the most beautiful girl in the world.

She must have heard James as well, because she had a smirk plastered to her lips, “Is that James?”

Peter smiled down at her, clearly, she had gotten used to spending mornings here if she could pick
out which of his roommates it was without seeing them, “Of course, it's game day, you know.”

“Oh right, the big day. He's going to be bouncing off the walls all day, isn't he?”

He loved that Maggie knew that, he loved that she was getting so used to his friends. Apparently,
James had heard them talking, because before Peter could respond to her he heard James call out,
“Pete! Are you guys awake?”

Peter did a quick peek to make sure they were both decent, he had his boxers on and Maggie had
one of Peter’s t-shirts on, “Yeah, we're good.”

James always waited for the go-ahead before barging in on them, after an embarrassing moment a
few months ago that had scarred all of them. As soon as he got the go-ahead, James pulled open the
curtains and plopped down at the end of the bed. This was not the first time James had done this, in
fact, he liked to make it a habit. He did it when Magdalene wasn't here too, but he seemed to have
gotten comfortable enough with her to do it nearly every time she slept over lately.

He already looked a bit sweaty in his training clothes, as he made himself comfortable,
“Goodmorning Pete, Maggie!”
Peter let out a little groan at James' high energy, which made Magdalene giggle, “Morning James,
are you excited for the big day?”

James grinned at her, clearly glad that someone remembered what an important day this was for
him, “Thrilled, we’re going to kick Slytherin’s arse today! You’re coming, right?”

She smiled at him, sometimes James’ enthusiasm could be contagious, “Definitely! I'm always
down to watch a Slytherin beatdown. So you're feeling confident?”

James threw her a cocky grin, one that he reserved for bragging about his quidditch skills,
“Obviously, the snakes don't have anything on us.”

Peter rolled his eyes at his friend, like he always did when James got cocky, “So James, exactly
how early did you wake up this morning and start preparing?”

James looked a little sheepish, “I woke up at six and couldn't fall back asleep, it's about eight thirty
now. Do you think it's too early for me to wake up Sirius so we can start strategizing?”

Peter and Maggie glanced briefly at each other, “Yes.”

James pouted, “But it's such an important day, I feel like Moony would understand if I–”

Peter interrupted, “James I think you know that he definitely would not understand and you are
incapable of waking up Sirius without waking up Moony too.”

James crossed his arms and his pout deepened, “It's not my fault he yells when someone tries to
wake him up.”

Maggie broke into a fit of laughter and Peter grinned, she had been there the last morning James
had attempted to wake Sirius up. Sirius freaked out when James tried to shake him awake, yelling
as if he had been murdered, which caused Remus to contemplate murdering everyone. Remus was
not the most pleasant to deal with in the morning and when Sirius had started screaming in his ear
first thing in the morning, he had hexed both Sirius and James with a silencing spell before shoving
SIirus on the floor and closing his curtains tightly. Peter hadn't exactly enjoyed the wake-up that
morning either, but it had been worth it to have Sirius and James beg him, nonverbally, to
countercurse the spell.
Peter watched as James shivered, clearly recalling the incident, “Fine, I won't wake him yet. But he
better be up by eleven, or I will kill him.”

Peter frowned, “Isn't the game at four? Why do you care if he's up by eleven?”

James rolled his eyes at Peter, as if the question was idiotic, “We have a team meeting and a play
run-through this afternoon. So I might just have to face the wrath of Moony afterall.”

“Fine, but if you do, then neither Maggie nor I will undo it this time.”

James looked affronted, at Peter's firm expression he switched his gaze to Magdalene, “Come on
Maggie, you'd help me out, wouldn't you?”

She pretended to think about it before laughing, “Nope, those who can't learn from their past
mistakes are bound to repeat them, this time without help.”

His face took on a look of mock hurt before he rolled his eyes at his friends, standing up, “Fine,
then I'll have to find some better friends to stick around. Maybe Mary or Marlene.”

Peter laughed, “Like they'd help you.”

James thought about it for a minute, before deciding, “Mary would.”

“If you're sure, but personally I think she would find it too hilarious to help you out.”

James glared at him, “Well I'm not going to wake up either of them, so I guess we will never
know.”

Maggie smirked at the two of them, “Agree to disagree, that's very adult of you boys.”

James straightened up looking proud of the compliment for a moment, before Peter grinned at him
mischievously, “Or I could just ask her at the game whether she would help you or not?”

James glared at him again, muttering under his breath, “Fucking dick.” Before speaking in a louder
tone, “So you guys are going to be in the Gryffindor section right? I'll be sure to celebrate all my
goals in front of you, my biggest fans.”

Peter began fake retching at that implication, even though he probably was one of James’ biggest
fans, while Maggie just rolled her eyes, “You can find Peter there. Remus and he are going to sit
with Mary and Lily I think, but I'm going to sit in the Ravenclaw section instead. Don't worry
though most of Ravenclaw is supporting Gryffindor.”

James nodded, smiling brightly, “That's good! I'm sure Slytherin will have plenty of supporters too,
but we could use all the support we can get.”

Maggie laughed, “Well I'll make sure that my friends and I cheer loudly for you guys.”

James flashed a grin at her, “That'd be great!! Alright, I'll leave you guys to your morning, but see
you at lunch!”

With that, he turned away and went back to messing around with some papers on his bed, quidditch
strategies no doubt. Peter pulled back his curtains, so they were alone again. He kissed the top of
her head lightly and she snuggled deeper into his side. Peter loved mornings like this.

**********************************************************************

“Pete!” Mary called to him, waving him over, enthusiastically. She was wearing a Gryffindor
practice jersey, and Peter would bet anything that she stole it from Sirius or James. Her dark curly
hair was thrown into a half up half down style, which he was sure was because of the warmth of
the day. It was a beautiful day for quidditch but it would be positively sweltering in the packed
stands.

He weaved his way over to sit next to her and Lily, who had her hair up because of the heat as
well. He grinned at the two girls, feeling the contagious excitement from the crowd. Lily greeted
him immediately, “Merlin it's boiling today, Pete. Do you think there's any chance this will be a
quick match?”
Peter laughed as Mary nodded vehemently in agreement, “Uh I think James would prefer it that
way, but I'm not so sure Slytherin will let that happen.”

She groaned lightly and Mary began fanning herself, in the most dramatic way possible, “I bet it
will be a rough game, though. Slytherin hasn't been in the finals in a couple years, they'll be itching
for a win, I bet.”

Lily nodded, “Yeah I think you're right, but at the moment we've got Slytherin beat by fifty points
for the house cup so hopefully that gives us an advantage.”

Peter couldn't help but smirk at the redhead, teasingly he asked. “Wow Lily, I had no idea you
were so into quidditch. When exactly did that begin?”

She flushed and glared at him, no doubt remembering the time she had specifically told Peter that
quidditch was just about as useful as dung bombs. Mary elbowed her lightly, her face adopting a
teasing expression, “Yeah Lily, when exactly did you become interested in quidditch?”

She stressed the word interested and wiggled her eyebrows at Lily. Peter wondered whether this
was a continuation of a conversation the two girls had had before. He suddenly felt as if he was on
the outside of a joke.

Lily's face was flushed and she glared at Marlene, before answering Peter, “I'm just gathering more
house spirit this year. I'm a prefect this year so I thought it was about time I got more involved.”

Peter nodded, though he didn't really think it mattered whether prefects cheered for their house
team or not. Mary was not going to let the matter drop as easily, “Oh really, and it wouldn't have
anything to do with another prefect we all know, one that also happens to be the captain of the
quidditch team.”

Lily's face burned as she fixed Mary with a withering glare, that was about how long it took him to
process that information. James? She was talking about James? Lily Evans had a crush on James
Potter?

He had to hold back the laugh that threatened to escape his lips, knowing that the two girls would
misunderstand it and believe he was making fun of Lily. In reality, the matter was funny for a
whole other reason. James, who had a crush on Lily for years, up until this year in fact had finally
moved on and now Lily liked him. It was as if irony and bad timing had a baby and named it
James Potter and Lily Evans. Merlin, this was almost too much.

As humorous as he found the situation, he also felt bad for Lily. He wasn't sure if she had noticed
James’s affections falling on someone else, but if she hadn't then this would be a rude awakening
for her. Lily was a good friend of his, and he didn't want her to find out when James and Regulus
finally made it official.

Mary was still smirking at Lily's embarrassment when Peter cleared his throat, they both looked at
him, curious for his reaction, “Uhh Lily, I feel as if you should know that James is already dating
someone.”

Both girls’ expressions turned to shock, Lily turned quiet and Mary got nosy, “What? Peter, when
the hell did this happen?”

He shrugged, feeling uncomfortable and cursing Remus for not meeting them sooner, he just had to
return that library book today. He ran his hand through his hair, “Actually it's been since just
before Halloween, I believe.”

Mary punched him in the arm, not too hard, but not exactly a tap either, “What the hell Peter! Why
didn't you tell me sooner?”

Peter knew that Mary thought he told her everything, he told her a lot, that was true, but he would
never have shared secrets about his best friends like that. Still, he could see why she was upset,
neither of the girls would understand the secrecy of James’s relationship, but it was for the best that
they knew he had one. He didn't want to see Lily get hurt after realizing he wasn't available.

“Sorry Mary, but they decided to keep it a secret, I can't exactly go around and tell everyone,
canI?”

She glared at him, crossing her arms, “Well you could've told me at least!”

Peter shook his head and Mary sighed heavily, her anger draining quickly, “Fine, but why all the
secrecy? James doesn't exactly seem like the type to enjoy sneaking around.”

“That's true. I'm not sure of their reason, but do me a favor and don't try to investigate, Mare. Let
them decide the right time to tell everyone?”
Mary reluctantly agreed and Peter thought they were past the conversation for a moment before
Lily spoke again, “I guess that's why he hadn't been bugging me much this year. I thought he had
finally taken my hints that I wanted some space.”

Peter shook his head, feeling unsure of how much to say, “James isn't too quick on the uptake I'm
afraid.”

She smiled at that and then shook her head lightly, apparently making a decision, “That's true. Well
no matter, I'm happy for him, really. I'd be even happier if his team kicks Slytherin's arse.”

Peter grinned and Mary laughed, and just like that everything was comfortable again. Remus
joined them and the four of them focused on the game. Mary filled them in on how Dorcas had
insisted on watching the game with the rest of the Ravenclaw team, even though Marlene tried to
persuade her otherwise. Remus and Lily spent the majority of the game talking about classes,
which bored Peter to tears.

Luckily he had Mary with him as she always managed to be entertaining, especially when she
brought the game day flask out. The firewhiskey she had filled it with was a little warm for the day,
but after listening to Remus describe the plot of some book he wanted Lily to read, he happily
helped Mary finish it.

The game was an intense one, just as Mary had predicted. Gryffindor was in high form today and
begrudgingly Peter had to admit that Slytherin was too. Although they still seemed to think that
cheap shots were necessary. They constantly threw elbows and teamed up on Gryffindor players,
but Sirius and his beater partner Annie Frost were in sharp form today. They aimed bludgers at any
Slytherin that came too close to a Gryffindor player.

James was playing incredibly, and Peter couldn't be prouder of his friend. Mary and he yelled
every time James scored and sometimes they even managed to make Remus join them. Peter was
once again in awe of his friend, James Potter was born to play quidditch.

Gryffindor was in the lead, but not by enough that they didn't also need to catch the snitch. It had
been about an hour and a half since the start of the game and Peter could see that both teams were
getting tired, with a score of 120-100. The seekers, Marlene and Regulus had had a couple false
starts throughout the game, but they always seemed to lose the snitch before they got too close.

Peter happened to have his eyes on the seekers when it happened, otherwise he wouldn't have even
seen it. It was so quick no one else would've noticed unless they were looking away from the
action. James had just scored and he was doing his celebratory lap, of course. He had just flown
near the seekers when he did it, he looked right at Regulus and blew him a kiss.

The game was continuing as James celebrated, so most people wouldn't have even seen him near
the seekers, but Peter did. It was such a surprising move that Peter had to double-check what he
just saw. But it must have happened because right after, when he expected Regulus to glare at
James for being so reckless about them in public, the Slytherin surprised him by catching James's
kiss. His face held a sardonic expression that told Peter that he really didn't care for the lovey-
dovey gesture, but then he smiled and winked back at his boyfriend.

Again it was such a quick interaction that most people wouldn't have caught it, even if they were
watching the two. Even if someone had seen it, a lot of people would probably dismiss it as players
teasing each other, but Peter knew better.

After that, the game continued with both teams' scores rising higher, but neither team increased
their lead substantially over one another. They would have to catch the snitch to win and whoever
caught the snitch would win the house cup, undoubtedly. Marlene seemed to be continuing the
strategy she held during the first time they played Slytherin, which was to follow Regulus closely.
Regulus, on the other hand, preferred to leisurely circle the top of the quidditch pitch, patiently
waiting to spot the metallic wings of the snitch.

The game was nearing two and a half hours when the seekers finally managed to see something. It
was Marlene who actually spotted it first, she dove down quickly, but Regulus was right on her tail.
He caught up with her quickly until they were neck in neck racing for the snitch. They were both
hurtling towards the ground and Peter had a flashback to earlier in the year when Regulus had
performed a Wronski feint and Marlene had hit the ground hard. He figured that wasn't the case
this time since they both seemed to have eyes on the snitch, but he had a moment of worry for his
friend, before it was all over.

Regulus had managed to overtake Marlene and had caught the snitch only feet above the ground
where he quickly pulled up to avoid crashing, the momentum caused him to tumble off his broom,
but it looked oddly graceful like he had actually tried to roll off his broom.

There were immediate cheers as they announced Slytherin as the winners and the Slytherin team
made quick work of lifting up Regulus like a trophy. The boy grinned as he held up the golden
snitch, Peter thought that perhaps the boy deserved it. He deserved to feel happy like he did now
because Peter was pretty sure he hadn't felt that way since his father died.

The Gryffindor stands were more subdued than they had been when Peter had taken his seat. Peter
was disappointed about the house cup, but he tried not to dwell on things that were beyond his
control. That was clearly not the philosophy of everyone in the stands, because they quickly began
to say nasty things about Regulus Black. Which he found childish and stupid.

Peter told the others to go ahead because he wanted to make sure James was alright. The
Gryffindor captain was bound to take this loss badly and Peter wanted to be there for him. He
waited around outside of the stadium till it was all cleared out. He had given Sirius a quick hug on
his way out, but his friend didn't seem to be too upset. When James still hadn't come out after
everyone else had vacated, Peter walked back to the changing rooms.

He was about to enter them when he heard voices at the side of the building. He was curious, sue
him. Imagine his surprise when he found a certain Gryffindor captain, fraternizing with the
opposing seeker. They were speaking quietly, so Peter didn't catch what they were saying.

He cleared his throat and both their heads shot up, James visibly relaxed when he saw it was Peter
and Regulus looked a little annoyed at the interruption. Apparently whatever they were talking
about was done, because Regulus turned to leave. James grabbed him by the waist, preventing him
from leaving. He hugged him from behind quickly, before lightly pressing a kiss on Regulus’s
forehead, “See you soon, bunny.”

Oh, eww. Peter had the perfect view of Regulus’s face flushing bright red, surprisingly it was
actually sort of sweet. Regulus ignored Peter’ presence completely and looked back at James as he
let go of Slytherin's waist, “An hour, right?”

At James's grin, Regulus moved away from the Gryffindor, not before James swatted his arse,
causing a squeak to come from the Slytherin. Peter watched as the boy moved to go past him, for
some reason he couldn't stop himself from speaking, “Good game, Regulus.”

The boy looked at him, surprised before muttering a quick thank you. Once he was gone, Peter
looked to James, “So any plans later?”

James grinned at him, before walking over and throwing an arm over Peter’s shoulders, “Yeah, hot
date. What about you?”

Peter laughed, James seemed happy and that made Peter happy. So even though Gryffindor had
lost the game, he was glad Regulus was finally giving James the time a day again. His friend
deserved to always be happy.
**************************************************************************************

Regulus

“Well if it isn't the infamous heir of Black, wandering the grounds, are you? Aren't you supposed
to be celebrating your quidditch triumph, superstar?”

Regulus whipped around at the sudden voice behind him, he was not happy with what he found.
Nathaniel Rowle was walking towards him, more like stalking towards him, really. He had the
sudden urge to run away as fast as he could, even though that would mean standing up James,
actually, that thought was the only one that kept him on the path to greenhouses. Even though he
desperately wanted to get as far away as possible from the sinister stare of Rowle, he couldn't stand
James up, not when they had already seen too little of each other in the last month.

Nobody had the ability to creep him out faster than Rowle did and that included the entire
Lestrange family. Rowle made his skin crawl and made him feel physically ill whenever the boy
stared at him, which happened more often than he would care for.

Rowle almost never spoke to him, or anyone really, but when he did it was never a good thing. The
last time Regulus had spoken to Rowle was after James and he had made their very public bet on
the quidditch game, earlier in the year and the stalker had wanted to know what James had
whispered to Regulus. He had lucked out on that occasion, right as Rowle had closed in on him,
Sirius had come looking for him to ask a similar question. Regulus took a quick scan of his
environment and realized that he would not be bailed out this time, the grounds were empty.

He had begun his trip down to the greenhouses almost immediately after stepping into the
Slytherin common room. The party that had begun following Slytherin's victory in the quidditch
finals was intense. He found that he couldn't stand to be there much longer than it took him to
change and say hi to Remy and Barty, who had joined the party.

He was anxious to see James, the short moment they had alone after the game wasn't enough. Now
though, he was regretting his hasty departure from the Slytherin common room, as it put him in the
direct path of Nathaniel Rowle, the very last place he wanted to be.

He attempted to school his expression into one of boredom before turning to the offending voice,
“Fuck off Rowle. don't you have some first years to terrify or something?”
As usual, Rowle’s face was expressionless, though he did slightly quirk an eyebrow in something
that resembled amusement, though one could never really tell what Rowle was thinking. Just the
quirk of his eyebrow pissed Regulus off. He didn't want Rowle to be amused by him, in fact, he
never wanted the creep to think of him again.

Unfortunately, he shared a lot of classes with Rowle, which was how he knew that the creepy
wanker stared at Regulus all the time. He would be in the middle of a class, taking notes, when he
would feel cold creeping up his spine and whenever he glanced back, there was Rowle staring at
him.

The thing about Rowle was that he had no shame whatsoever. He would continue to stare at
Regulus even when Regulus caught him. In fact, he seemed to get a kick out of making Regulus
uncomfortable like that.

No one else in the school treated him that way, even the people who had been talking shit about
him and his family, ever since his father was revealed to be a death eater, but at least they did it
behind his back.

Now he knew he wasn't exactly feared at Hogwarts, but he had recently acquired a reputation for
having a temper, after the whole fight with Mulciber months back, so people didn't want to piss
him off in general. Rowle didn't care though, he didn't care about Regulus’ reputation, his money,
or his family's affluence. He didn't seem to care about anything that anyone else did and that scared
Regulus.

In first year, Rowle would occasionally stare at Barty the way he did Regulus until Barty punched
him so hard he broke the boy's nose. He didn't continue staring at Barty after that, but it was almost
worse the way he pretended Barty wasn't there after that incident. He wasn't scared of Barty that
was for sure, it seemed more like he was borrowing his time till he could get back at Barty.

“Oooh, so hostile, Black. I'm surprised you have room for that hostility with all this excitement
going on. Then again, I suspect you must have a plan to relieve that anger, don't you?”

Regulus's eyes snapped back to Rowle’s, which he had been pointedly avoiding before. The man
held no expression, but his eyes held something resembling a taunt, Regulus held still as a shiver of
discontent ran through his spine, “And what exactly is that supposed to mean, Rowle?”

“Oh nothing, Black. I just suspected that you were taking a nice relaxing walk to the greenhouses.
Why? Was there another thing you were doing to relieve tension?”
Regulus glared at him, he didn't believe for one second that Rowle had meant the walk was tension
relieving. He turned around quickly and marched away, without replying. Unfortunately, Rowle
followed him, “Oh Black, why don't you slow down a bit, this is making conversation difficult.”

“And you didn't think maybe that was a hint that I didn't want to converse with you.” Regulus
practically growled.

The smug voice spoke from behind him as he continued on his way, increasing his speed, “Oh, I'm
not great with hints, I prefer to be more straightforward about things, don't you?”

“No, actually I don't and I certainly don't prefer to do anything with you. So Fuck off before I make
you.”

“Hey, Hey.” His voice changed from smug to false innocence in a matter of seconds and Regulus
could just imagine him holding his hands up in surrender, not that he turned around to check. “I just
wanted to congratulate you on the big quidditch victory, no need to get aggressive, Black. Oh, also
I think it's about time I congratulate you on inheriting such an ancient and noble house, really you
must be over the moon to be continuing such a longstanding line of prosperity and purity.”

Something about the venom that dripped from those words made Regulus want to lunge at the man
and claw out his eyes, but as he had said before, he wasn't a fighter. Rowle was the most dangerous
student at Hogwarts, probably even more than Barty. At least Barty cared about a few people,
while Rowle didn't appear to care about anyone.

This did make Regulus slow though, but he continued on his way. Rowle spoke again, allowing a
mocking sort of humor to intertwine his words, “It's too bad about your father, then again, I
suppose you didn't care much about him anyways. I mean you couldn't if you were so willing to
shame the family name as you did. I guess all that worked out in your favor though, with you
getting the keys to the castle and all that.”

Regulus's blood froze, there had been a lot of whispers around Hogwarts about Sirius, him, his
father, and the whole Black clan. About what really happened that day of the funeral, their father
was a death eater and now everyone knew it. Everyone expected the same from his sons, even
given their subsequent disownment. Sirius had received money and property and Regulus had
received “the keys to the castle” as Rowle had put it, in most people's books that made them just as
guilty as their father. It was like people were just waiting for the day they began hexing muggle-
borns in the hall.
People spoke terribly of them, they seemed to at least try to be subtle but he still heard it, all of it.
He ignored it all, not bothering to engage with a bunch of small-minded children who spout foul
rumors about him and his brother. About how the two brothers must've blackmailed their father
into awarding them the way he did, or that the entire lawsuit against his parents was just a publicity
stunt that the brothers had concocted. People never said it directly to him like Rowle just had, but
they certainly said it behind his back.

Regulus stopped short, his tone becoming dangerous, “What did you just say?”

Rowle seemed unbothered by the change in Regulus’s tone, “Oh, I think you heard me, Reggie.”

“Don't call me that.” Regulus spat, turning around to glare at the creep.

Rowle was unbothered, “Why not? I hear that's what your close friends call you.”

“It's not.”

“Huh, that's odd. No matter, I'll call you whatever you want, Black.”

Regulus didn't bother responding to the bastard, instead, he swiftly turned and stormed off once
more. This time Rowle didn't follow him, which he was grateful for. Regulus slipped between two
of the greenhouses, where there was a space about a yard wide, and began his wait for James. The
long buildings had a bit of foliage around them that made it the perfect spot for the two to meet
when the weather was nice. It was also far enough away from the greenhouse, that many students
partook in their vices, that it was perfectly safe for them to meet.

Regulus was in a decidedly worse mood than he had been only minutes before. It was supposed to
be a great day for him, he won the house cup and James had promised him a reward. Instead, he
was feeling incredibly frustrated and annoyed, fucking Rowle. He leaned his head back against one
of the buildings and knocked his head back repeatedly, trying to get the image of Rowle’s blank
stare out of his mind, that's how James found him.

Apparently, James hadn't been as far behind as he thought. In fact, he had probably passed Rowle
on his way down, but Regulus doubted that the creep would say anything to James. The Marauders
had a bit of a reputation at Hogwarts. they weren't known for fighting, though they would if they
needed to, their pranks were infamous and very few wanted to be on the receiving end of their ire.
He was startled by a voice that came from outside the dark area they had chosen for their meet-up.
Luckily he recognized the voice as James, or he might have thought Rowle had followed him after
all. James’ tone was teasing and light and Regulus melted at the voice immediately, “You know
usually people get head injuries during the game, not after they win.”

His head snapped up and he saw James’s smug expression. James must have stopped by his dorm,
like Regulus had, because he was wearing muggle jeans that made his arse look incredible and a
powder blue sweater. He looked good enough to eat, truly. James didn't often wear blue, because
the boy was obsessed with red, but he knew how much Regulus loved seeing him in blue. Regulus
felt all of his anxiety after the encounter with Rowle dissipated in an instant at the sight of James
Potter.

He fixed a smirk on his face, but really he just wanted to grin at James, fully, “Oh I know, but you
know me, I just have to be different.”

James grinned at him and it was such an infectious grin that Regulus’ resolve broke and he smiled
brightly at James, unable to contain his excitement at seeing him. James’s eyes brightened at
Regulus as he stepped into the shadows and close to Regulus, his tone low, “Oh I know, baby.” His
hands found the wall behind Regulus’s head and he leaned in close to Regulus’s lips. His voice
was husky and it made Regulus shiver with lust for the boy, “By the way, congratulations on your
victory, champ.”

Regulus couldn't help but tease James a little, though his breathy voice let on how affected he was
by James’ presence, “How hard was that for you to get out?”

James’s grin didn't even waiver, as his minty breath danced across Regulus’s lips, “Not hard at all.
You deserve it, you played incredible today.”

Regulus lightly shoved James back, unable to think with James so close. James didn't really move,
but he did lean back a couple inches, “Come on James, be honest. How bad did it kill you to see
Slytherin win the house cup?”

James laughed lightly, his eyes shining with emotion as he looked at Regulus, “Not at all, I admit I
was disappointed. I wanted to win my first year as captain, but it was impossible for me to be too
upset when I saw them lift you up in the air, the way they did. I was so unbelievably proud of you,
Reggie.”

Regulus’ breath stuttered, it was just like James to take his breath away in a single sentence,
“James Potter, are you telling me that you care about me more than Quidditch?”
James’s eyes danced with humor, “It's a close second, but yes I care about you more than
quidditch, Reg.”

Regulus slapped a hand to his chest dramatically, “Be still, my beating heart. A boyfriend who
cares about me more than a sport. I am just so lucky.” James laughed at Regulus’ impersonation of
a woman in the 1800s. Regulus preened a bit, feeling proud that he made James laugh. He spoke
again, curious, “Be honest James, you aren't mad at me for catching the snitch, are you?”

James smiled softly at Regulus, leaning in closer, his lips brushing against his boyfriend's cheek
softly, before whispering, “No bunny, I could never be mad at you for being so talented.” He
leaned back and got a perfect view of Regulus visibly shuddering, he fixed a devilish grin on his
face, “ In case you forgot, we won the cup last year and I do intend to win it next year as well.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Oh, I don't think that's gonna happen. I hear there's a rumor going around
that the “amazing” Slytherin seeker is going to be captain next year.”

James grinned at Regulus, his eyes flashing with happiness, “Really? You're going to be captain?
That's amazing Reggie!”

Regulus shrugged, feigning nonchalance about something he was very excited about, “Yeah, well,
not everybody will think that. Mulciber is graduating and Yaxley and Avery suck, so it's looking
that way, yeah. Nothing is official yet, though.”

“You are the best seeker Slytherin has ever had and you've been on the team since second year,
you will definitely get it. I'm surprised they didn't give it to you this year, you were so obviously
more qualified than Mulciber.”

Regulus's cheeks flushed with heat, James had a way of making him blush like no other. It was
actually extremely embarrassing to be constantly blushing like a schoolgirl around your boyfriend.
It's not as if they hadn't been dating long enough for the blushing and giggling stage to be over. Yet
he couldn't control his actions around James Potter, which meant he was constantly acting like a
fool.

“You flatter me, James Potter”

James smirked at him, “Somebody has to keep that ego of yours up so I don't look so cocky. It's
just unfair for you to be that talented and modest too.”

Regulus giggled, he had actually fucking giggled. Merlin, sometimes he wanted to drown himself.
There was just something about James that made him feel so giddy inside. He had missed James
desperately, he had missed feeling happy like he did when he was with James.

Suddenly, he was hit with an overwhelming urge for James to know. He needed James to know that
the argument they had a month prior was irrelevant. He didn't care what society expected of him.
Fuck his family and his ancestors, he wasn't going to marry a woman when he could have James
fucking Potter. He had known it was the only decision for him, that James was the only one for
him, but he had also felt like he needed some time with his thoughts. Now looking at James’s
beautiful face, he needed James to know immediately.

He wanted all the things James wanted and more. He wanted to be with James and he would find a
way to make sure his family was completely out of the picture, heirdom be damned.

“James, I missed you. I missed you so much.”

James’s expression softened, and then his eyes turned cold. This confused Regulus more than
anything. He decided that it didn't matter, he was going to tell him in a second anyways, and then
everything would be alright. His voice came out more hesitant as he spoke next, “I need you to
know that I-”

James didn't let him finish, “Don’t. Not right now, please. I just want to enjoy this moment. We can
talk later if you still want to.”

Regulus didn't want to talk later, he wanted to talk now, “But I feel like you need to know now
that-”

Once again James interrupted him, his voice firm and tinged with sadness, “No. No, I just want to–
I just want to enjoy this, because I missed you too, so much it hurt.”

This made Regulus pause, James really didn't want to hear whatever he thought Regulus was going
to say. He seemed almost scared at what Regulus would tell him. Regulus knew that James would
feel better if he would just let him speak his peace, but he didn't want to risk upsetting James. It
didn't matter much anyways, he could tell him later. They had all the time in the world to have this
discussion, there was no need to rush it. Besides, James had missed him and Regulus would much
rather focus on that at the moment.

James leaned in, pressing his nose against Regulus' nape, breathing deeply. Regulus felt his breath
stutter at the sensation. He hadn't spent any real time with James for an entire month and it had
been painful. He was a healthy teenage boy and just having James this close to him was making
him feel like he urgently needed his hands all over the Gryffindors body or vice versa.

James’s voice came out husky and lust-filled, Regulus was grateful that James was feeling just as
affected as him, “Merlin, you are the most beautiful creature in the world. How do you even go
through the day without people throwing themselves down at your feet? Every time I see you I
want to lock you in my room forever, to keep their prying eyes off you.”

Regulus was tempted to make a joke about it. He considered asking James how he knew people
weren't throwing themselves at his feet or maybe he would comment on James’s possessive
behavior, but that was before James pressed a soft kiss right behind his ear and his knees buckled.
James held him tightly against the wall until he was able to get a hold of his motor functions once
more. The wanker knew exactly how to drive Regulus wild. It was a struggle to speak with James’s
lips on his neck, he just managed to pant out, “You always say that.”

Regulus could feel James's grin against his neck before he began peppering kisses down his throat.
His left hand came up and cradled the other side of Regulus’s neck with a firm but gentle grip.
Regulus shivered at the sensation and wondered briefly if he would mind if James tightened his
grip until Regulus lost consciousness, he doubted he would mind much at all. James was in his
element as he spoke in a rough soft voice, “You never seem to mind. Would you prefer I call you
something else, gorgeous?”

Regulus fucking melts. James always seemed to know how to make him feel this way. He was
practically panting like he had just run a mile, while James sucked heartily at the base of his neck.
He lightly nipped, sucked, and licked his way up Regulus’s throat, until he was sure that it was
littered with bruises.

James had a habit of brutalizing his neck, often. Luckily he was a wizard, so he could heal them
quickly enough so he didn't look depraved. It's not as if he had never given James a love bite
before, he had, but he was usually more subtle and sly about it than James. Half the time James
didn't even know he had gotten one. James was almost animalistic when he returned the favor. Not
that he would appreciate that comparison, but the way James seemingly attacked his throat when
they were alone couldn't be described any other way.

James had never precisely said so, but Regulus had a suspicion that the reason James liked marking
his neck so much was because he wanted to claim Regulus. He supposed it was understandable
considering they had been a secret for so long, but Regulus wasn't usually the type to allow
someone to claim him. Still, he reveled in the sight of those marks on his throat before he healed
them, not that he would ever admit that.

Maybe this time he wouldn't heal them. Maybe this time he would just let everyone see them, see
that he was taken. He shivered at the thought, finding he quite enjoyed that idea. After all, once
James and he talked about the future, maybe things could be a little more open. He still wasn't
completely ready to tell Sirius quite yet, but soon.

Once James had sufficiently marked Regulus’s neck, he moved to entwine his fingers in the
Slytherin's curls. He buried his face into the silky black hair, breathing in Regulus’s shampoo.
James had told him more than once how much he adored the smell of Regulus’s hair. Regulus had
even offered to order him the same shampoo from the French catalog he used, but James told him
that it would be much too distracting to have Regulus’s scent follow him wherever he went.
Regulus had blushed heartedly when he had said that, but was secretly glad James turned him
down. He sort of liked the smell of his boyfriend's cheap shampoo.

James’ voice came out muffled, his face still pressed into the black curls, “Merlin, you have no
idea how often I dream of you.”

Regulus was surprised at that and he couldn't help but pant out the question, “You dream about
me?”

James pulled back, just enough so Regulus could make out the grin on his face, “Every single
night.”

“Wet dreams? What am I doing in these dreams, Jamie?”

“Everything. I dream about these lips.” As he spoke he let his fingers trail from Regulus’s hair to
ghost along his lips, tracing the outline of them.

Regulus held his breath as the fingers pressed against them, “My lips.”

It wasn't exactly a question but James answered anyway, “Yes, I dream about these lips
constantly.”

“What are my lips doing in your dreams? What am I doing with my lips?”
James smiled, sensing where Regulus was going but shook his head slightly, “Mostly you're
laughing.”

Regulus inched back from James, confused. He had expected James to go into detail about
something more sexual, but instead, he dreams about Regulus laughing? His eyebrows were
furrowed as he asked, “Laughing? Why?”

James smiled softly, it seemed for a moment as if James was thinking about Regulus’s laugh,
before he spoke, “Yes, you are laughing. You are always laughing in my best dreams. I love your
laugh so much. It's so goofy and so not graceful, like the rest of you is, yet it's so unequivocally
you that it makes my heart beat faster. If I could only hear one sound for the rest of my life then it
would be that laugh. If I could bottle a sound and save it forever, it would be the sound of you
giggling. You have no idea what just the sound of you being happy does to me.”

James’s hand traveled back to Regulus’s hair, gripping the curls tightly, “I dream about this hair
splayed out on my pillow. So pretty Reg, you are so pretty.” He slid his hand out of Regulus’s hair
and traced the bruises on his neck. Every inch he touched, seared with heat, Regulus wanted him so
badly, “I dream about this neck, littered with bruises.”

His hand reached up to cup Regulus’s face, “I dream of your eyes, your cheekbones, your nose, and
I especially dream about….” His other arm snaked around Regulus’s waist and gripped his arse
tightly, “This arse. I dream about this arse every single night, baby.”

The squeeze of his arse knocked him out of whatever trance James had him under, he laughed
slightly at the predictability of the bum comment, “Good, for a minute I was worried that you
weren't thinking about sex every minute of the day, like every other teenage boy.”

James just grinned at him, “Only ninety percent of the time, the other ten percent of the time, I still
think about you. You occupy my mind, Regulus Black. You're everywhere. You're in my thoughts,
my dreams, my ambitions, and my goals. All I want is you, you have no idea how much I am
consumed by thoughts of you every day.”

“Every day?” Regulus found himself asking, pathetically.

James didn't seem to care if he was pathetic because he responded immediately, “Every second of
every day, I'm yours, Regulus Black.”
Regulus let out a deep breath, and whispered to James, “Nobody gives you the credit you deserve,
James Potter. You have a gift for words and yet nobody seems to know about it.”

James grinned at him, “That's because I'm only poetic when I think of you. You make me feel
ridiculously affectionate.”

Regulus blushed, because, of course, who wouldn't blush when somebody said that to them. That
was all it took for Regulus to lunge at James, pressing his lips against James' own. He couldn't help
the depraved way he clung to James’s lips. If he hadn't already been in love with James Potter, he
would've been after that speech.

Regulus never thought that anyone could feel that way about him. He never even considered that
he might have something like he did with James. As a child, he had always assumed he'd marry a
woman, arranged by his parents of course, and that he would grow up to be just as unhappy as the
rest of his family, but now he had James.

James responded to the kiss immediately, wrapping his arms around Regulus tightly. Regulus slid
his arms up around James’s neck, pulling him as close as he could manage. They began kissing,
roughly, aggressively, but so damn beautifully, as if they would never kiss again. Their lips clung
together, neither willing to part, even for a breath. He loves James Potter and he always would.

He didn't know how long they were kissing before they were found, it felt like a long time and no
time at all. Suddenly James was jerked away from Regulus's lips, and the arms that were wrapped
around James’s neck were yanked apart roughly as James was taken away.

“Stop! Stop, what are you doing!”

He didn't have time to register the voice before he turned and locked eyes with Sirius. Oh shit.

Sirius seemed confused as he let go of James' arm. James had been pulled out into the sun and was
standing near Sirius, gaping at him. James had certainly not expected to be grabbed like that and
Regulus was sure that when his boyfriend had seen it was Sirius, he expected yelling immediately.
To Regulus it was pretty clear that Sirius wasn't sure what he was looking at yet, but he also knew
that when his brother's brain finally caught up it would be bad.

Right now though, his brother was still beyond confused. He looked between them as if the answer
would be written somewhere. Regulus was sure that whatever Sirius had thought was going on
when he pulled James off him was clearly not taking place, because his brother looked perplexed.

“Sirius, wait!” A voice panted as they ran around the corner of the building, stopping as soon as he
saw the scene in front of him, it was Remus Lupin. He looked exhausted as if he had run down
here from the castle, in fact, Sirius looked a bit like he had been running as well. Lupin had the
Marauders map clutched in his hand as he stared in utter horror at the scene in front of him.

Sirius barely spared the boy a glance as he went back to analyzing what was happening. Nobody
said a word as they all waited for him to connect the dots himself. Sure Regulus could have
attempted to bullshit some story and cover for them but what was the point. Sirius had already seen
all the evidence he needed to understand, his brain just wasn't allowing him to process it. Besides
he had a feeling Lupin wouldn't let them leave here without Sirius knowing the truth.

James seemed the most petrified of everyone, which he supposed was understandable. Regulus
only just started to become close with Sirius again, he never even lied to his brother about James.
Lupin seemed worried, but he also wasn't the one sneaking around behind Sirius’s back, either.
James though, well he was likely to get the brunt of Sirius’ anger.

It felt longer than it was, the whole process only took about ten seconds, but it felt like hours as he
watched his brother's eyes dart between the two of them. At James’s swollen lips, Regulus’s messy
hair, at James’s ruffle shirt, but the final clue was when Sirius’s eyes flickered to his brother's neck
which was littered with hickies that hadn't been there an hour ago.

Regulus was surprised by how fast the confusion morphed into rage. He was even more surprised
by how fast Sirius moved. One second he was standing a little away from James and the next he
was right in his face, pulling his arm back and punching his best friend straight in the nose.
Regulus heard the crunching sound before he could even process what was happening. James
didn't fall but he stumbled back a few steps and that's all it took for Regulus to step up in between
the two boys.

Sirius didn't seem to be looking at him as he stared with rage at James over his shoulder. Regulus
shoved Sirius back, “What the hell, Sirius!”

That's when Sirius’s rage locked on him, “What the hell? What the hell! I just found out that my
best friend has been fucking my little brother, that's what the hell!” Regulus felt James’s hand on
his shoulder, pushing him aside lightly, Sirius’s eyes locked on his original target, “How could
you? How could you do this! I can't believe it, I really can't. Tell me that I'm wrong! Tell me that I
just punched you for no reason. Tell me that you didn't leave those marks on my brother.”
James opened his mouth like he was gonna respond, but he said nothing. What could he say to
that? Sirius had a deranged expression on his face as he began begging James to tell him that it
wasn't true, “Tell me, tell me you didn't. Tell me that this is all a poor attempt at a joke. Tell me
that you didn't, please. James fucking tell me that it's not true, please.”

Regulus could admit that he felt a little bad for his brother at that moment. His big brother, who
had always seemed invincible to him, was begging James for it not to be true. Sirius wanted more
than anything for this to not be true, that much was clear to Regulus. Meanwhile, James was
frozen, just staring at his best friend with a guilty expression.

“Fucking speak, you son of a bitch. Tell me, fucking tell me!” Sirius lunged for James once more
but Lupin was there to pull Sirius back.

Finally, James spoke, his voice was rough as if he was on the verge of crying as he said in a
pleading tone, “I'm sorry Sirius, I'm so sorry. Please let me explain.”

“Explain? Do you want to explain? FIne explain to me how you thought it was okay to defile my
little brother behind my back?”

Defile him, merlin was this the 1400s? Regulus jumped in before James could begin whatever
attempt at explaining he had in his head. He was firm as he spoke over James, “He did not defile
me. I'm sorry you had to find out this way but that is no excuse for punching James and accusing
him of taking advantage of me.”

Sirius’s eyes snapped to his, and he almost stepped back from the heat of his glare. Merlin, it
looked just like their mothers. Images flashed in his mind of Sirius pinning him to the wall in the
dungeons, and choking him when he found out that Regulus had discovered Lupin's secret. He
wasn't sure if Sirius saw the fear in his eyes or if he really only blamed James, but he didn't make
any move toward Regulus.

“How long has this been going on?” His voice was deceptively calm, but Regulus didn't trust it for
a minute.

James answered, still clearly trying to plead his case, “We–Since the first quidditch game we
were–”

Sirius interrupted, “Are you telling me that it's been almost nine months since you've been hooking
up with my little brother? He’s Bunny? He’s the guy that talked dirty to you in French? Of fucking
course he did, the pretentious fuck–”

Regulus’s head snapped to James and he gritted out, not caring if he was interrupting what was sure
to be an entertaining monologue from Sirius, “You told them about that? What else did you tell my
brother about? Did you tell him that I like my hair pulled too? Merlin, James what the fuck!”

James’s eyes widened, but he really couldn't defend himself when Sirius had just ratted him out. It
didn't matter because Sirius began the most dramatic display of retching that he had ever seen,
“Ughhh that's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard. I really did not need to hear that right now!
Fuck Reg who would've guessed you were such a slut?”

Regulus felt like he had been slapped, had his brother just called him a slut? He had never been
called a slut before, and the last person he expected to call me that was his brother. Immediately
James stepped in front of Regulus, “Hey don't call him that.”

Sirius stared at James, a million emotions were crossing his face but he didn't speak right away.
Regulus was glad James had stuck up for him, but he didn't think it would exactly help his case
with Sirius. He was a bit wary as he watched the two boys standoff, James no longer held the guilty
expression, clearly still upset that Sirius had called Regulus a slut.

In the end, Sirius didn't say anything, he just turned on his heel and stormed away. Lupin followed
behind him closely. Only when they were out of sight did James turn around. James’s expression
was one of fear, fear of losing his best friend, and Regulus quickly enveloped him in a crushing
hug.

Neither of them had wanted Sirius to find out this way, but now that it had happened all they could
be trying to make him understand.

*********************************************************

Sirius

Sirius wasn't sure how he should be feeling right now. Angry? Yes. Betrayed? Definitely.
Overwhelmed? Of course. Relieved? No, that's definitely not what he should be feeling right now.
Sirius hadn't really ever felt as betrayed as he did right now, he genuinely wasn't sure how to even
handle this type of betrayal, especially because it came from James. James was his best friend in
the entire world. James, who he thought of as a brother….was having sex with his actual brother. It
was practically incest.

He wished he would have thought of that when he had caught them, but he hadn't really thought of
much to say at all. Beyond calling Regulus a slut, which he admits he feels bad about. Regulus isn't
a slut because he's dating James, but he is a little shit for hitting up his brother's best friend.

No, it was mostly James he was upset at. James had lied to him for months about the identity of
Bunny. Sirius had never felt so stupid in his life because now that he thought about it, it was
fucking obvious. He had already guessed that James was dating a Slytherin, he had always thought
James was staring at Crouch but really it had been Regulus the entire time.

James had firmly refused to even hint at his boyfriend's identity, which Sirius thought was a little
odd for his friend, who usually told him everything. Well, he supposed James didn't really tell him
everything anymore. James had lied to him so much in the last year that Sirius wasn't sure that he
could even trust James anymore.

His mind was racing, just thinking about all the occasions in the last month in which James had
lied to him. All the times Sirius had thought James was just going to hang out with Bunny when in
reality he was defiling his baby brother. Maybe it was irrational to consider Regulus defiled when
it was clear that he was just as guilty as James, but he didn't really care. Regulus was his baby
brother, the one that he had taken care of and practically raised until he was twelve, and he could
be as irrational as he wanted about the man who took him to bed.

If it had been anyone else Sirius might have done more than just punch him. Seeing his brother
with bruises all up his neck had made him feel physically ill, just knowing that someone had
marked him up in that way. The fact that it was James pissed him off, but not as much as it
would've pissed him off if he didn't already know how James felt about Regulus.

That was the confusing thing about the whole matter for Sirius. He was angry, so fucking angry,
but he also felt a bit of relief. He had known that Regulus was dating someone, but he hadn't
known who that person could be. The person could have abused Regulus for all he knew and he
didn't like not knowing. Since he had found out about Regulus’s boyfriend, he had made all kinds
of scenarios up about the man that Regulus was dating, and most of them scared the shit out of
him.

Now though, he knew the truth about the person Regulus had found. The man was a liar and a
terrible best friend, but he also was someone that was in love with Regulus, someone that stared at
him constantly with the most sickening sweet expression, someone who would stand up for
Regulus even against their bestfriend and someone who would come running if he was ever in
trouble. Sirius sort of hated James right now, but that didn't mean he thought that he would be a
bad boyfriend for Regulus.

“Sirius, I know you are upset right now, but I think you should know that those two love each
other, a lot. It's not okay that they kept this from you for so long, but it is real. It's not just a fling
for either of them.” Remus spoke hesitantly as if he was scared Sirius would freak out at him next.
The two of them had made it as far as the whomping willow before Remus decided to break the
silence.

Sirius had appreciated the time to think, but he understood that Remus was just trying to help. He
stopped and heard Remus stop from behind him as he realized something about what Remus had
said. He turned slowly, his eyes finding Remus's, “You knew, didn't you?”

Remus’s eyes clouded with shame and Sirius sighed not knowing how much more of this he could
take, “Who else?”

“Peter, he found out first. I had wanted to tell you but Peter told me that it wasn't right to push
Regulus out of the closet. Peter and I both tried to get James to tell you earlier, but he was waiting
till Regulus was ready. Regulus had said they would tell you before the end of the year. Otherwise,
I think just Crouch and Remy know, your brother told them.”

Sirius wanted to be angry at Remus and Peter, but what good would it do? Peter and Remus both
had their reasons for not telling him, whether they were right or wrong. James even had a reason
that wasn't completely unfounded. Regulus was the only one who didn't seem to have an excuse for
not telling him, for being the reason everyone had lied to him. Still, he couldn't manage to be angry
at Regulus, he had grown up in that same house, and he knew the types of things their family said
about homosexuals. He could never fault his brother for being scared to come out, that just
wouldn't be fair.

“Crouch knew before me? Wow, doesn't that just feel amazing!” Sirius said sardonically, even
though he didn't really care that much.

Remus shrugged halfheartedly, “He's your brother's best friend.”

Sirius nodded, not feeling like that warranted a response. Instead, he sighed, stepping closer to
Remus, and enveloping his boyfriend in a hug. Remus hugged him tightly, before asking in a quiet
voice, “Are you okay?”
Sirius thought about it before he responded, he really wasn't sure himself, “No, not really. James
lied to me, Regulus fell in love with my best friend, Peter and you have been hiding this from me,
and honestly, this is not my best hair day.”

Remus snorted slightly at the hair comment, “Are you mad at me?”

Sirius hugged him tighter, probably squeezing the boy to death, “No, I'm angry but not really at
anyone in particular. James maybe, but I mostly feel sad about James. It's odd I can't really place
any of my emotions right now.”

Remus didn't say anything but he leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of Sirius’s head, “Do
you wanna go to Hogsmeade and get smashed? Might take your mind off things.”

Drinking never really helped as much as people thought it would, but Sirius found he didn't really
care. He was going to get pleasantly drunk and try not dwell on his multitude of feelings for the
moment.

***********************************************************************

Sirius,

I want you to know that I am sorry, truly for everything that happened today. I am sorry that you
found James and me the way you did. I didn't want you to find out that way, but I suppose when
you put something off for so long it's bound to happen when you least want it to. I am not sure why
I waited so long to tell you, I always told myself that it would be easier in a few months, but then
by that time I chickened out. You didn't deserve to find out the way you did, so here it is. I am gay
and I am in love with James Potter, I know that you probably are upset by this information, but I
need you to know. When James and I first started this, neither of us thought of it as anything
serious. As time went on, I found myself falling more and more in love with him. I had never had
someone treat me the way James did. Like I was something special, something that should be
treasured. All my life I had been a backup to you, the second son, James was the first person who
didn't treat me that way. He didn't treat me even like I was your brother. It was like he saw me, for
me, and after that, it was impossible not to love him. I'm sure that's what you felt like when you
first met James too. He has a way of taking damaged people like us and making us feel whole
again. Maybe that's a silly thought but I just want you to understand why I fell in love with him.
Please try to go easy on him, it's not his fault that he couldn't tell you earlier. He loves you so much
and I don't want you to blame this all on him. If you are mad at someone let that be me please, I'm
much more deserving of it than James is.
Love,

RAB (Your Brother)

 Heartbreak
Chapter Notes

Ooooh, this one is going to hurt. Enjoy the chapter!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Sirius

It had been nearly two weeks since Sirius had discovered James and Regulus between the
greenhouses. It still made him feel physically ill to even think about it, he kept having flashbacks
of himself teasing James about Bunny and how they truly did fuck like rabbits. Of course, at the
time he hadn't realized that the mysterious Bunny was in fact the brother he had practically raised.
He hated the idea of it and things really hadn't gotten much clearer than they had been right after
the fact.

He was still upset with James, because really what kind of best friend does that? Maybe it wasn't
fair to be mad at James, seeing as the boy had practically saved his life after he left home, but he
still couldn't push it aside. As the days drew closer to Summer break, he was feeling his anxiety
increase. Technically he had a deed to a home and enough money to sustain himself, but legally he
wasn't seventeen yet, which meant he really should go back to the Potter’s as they were his legal
guardians. Plus he really missed Effie and Monty, who were practically his mom and dad. He
hadn't been able to visit them at Christmas because he went with Remus to see his parents instead.
He had gone fearfully long without their hugs and kisses.

When he had first met them, he hadn't been used to attention and affection and now he found he
didn't want to give it up just because he was mad at their son. He wondered what the Potters would
say if they knew that he had even considered not coming this summer, they'd be upset probably.
Still, maybe they'd understand once they found out what James had done. They were both
reasonable people and surely they would see his side of things.

He had been avoiding James to the best of his ability since the incident, no matter how many times
James tried to talk to him. It was pretty clear that James was distraught that Sirius was avoiding
him, but that didn't stop him from seeing Reggie. Sirius should've known after he received
Regulus’s letter that at the very least his brother had no intentions of ending the relationship, but he
figured James would at least pump the brakes a bit given the circumstances.

No, instead James disappeared practically every night, never stating where he was going, but Sirius
didn't have to think too hard, because James had been disappearing like this all year. Now that
Sirius knew that it was his brother he was sneaking off to see, it left a sour taste in his mouth.

Remus told him that he was being unreasonable by expecting the two of them to be so ashamed of
their lies that they would stop seeing each other, though Sirius didn't think so. He had forgiven
Moony embarrassingly quickly for lying or at least not telling him that James and Regulus were
dating. He forgave Peter quickly too, Sirius didn't think that he could afford to be angry with his
boyfriend and his best friend on top of being upset with his other half. So instead he forgave them,
Peter apologized to Sirius after he had been filled in on everything that had gone on after the
quidditch final. His friend was such a good listener, Sirius didn't have any trouble forgiving the
boy.

Right away they both were very supportive of his avoidance of James, obviously thinking he
needed some space, though neither of them froze out James. Instead, it seemed as if they refused to
pick sides. After two weeks the two of them were getting sick of the distance between the group.
They both began encouraging Sirius to have it out with James, as Peter put it. Apparently,
according to Wormtail, neither of them would feel better until they got some things off their chest.
Sirius didn't really care if James felt better, but Moony could be extremely persuasive when he
wanted to be.

Sirius had been strong in his avoidance of James, but still, he knew that with the break approaching
in less than a week, he would have to have the discussion sometime. He didn't want to, he didn't
care what James’s excuse was, but he also didn't want to show up at Effie and Monty’s door
without them “having it out”. That wasn't fair to the people who cared for him like a son even
when they had no obligation to.

So here he was in the dorm room waiting for James to return from prefect rounds. Remus and Peter
had purposely vacated the area, enthusiastically encouraging him to talk to James. He didn't know
what he was going to say, but he figured it was now or never. This was the last week of school, it
would probably be a really awkward summer if they didn't have this discussion now.

When James opened the dorm, he looked surprised to see Sirius sitting on his bed waiting. James
gave him a hesitant smile, “Hey Sirius.”

Now James was more than likely expecting Sirius to bolt like he had done every other time he had
been left alone with his friend. So Sirius took a little pleasure in the uneasy expression James held
when he realized Sirius wasn't leaving. Sirius leaned back against his headboard, crossing his arms,
trying to seem nonchalant as he spoke, “It's time we had a talk. don't you agree?”

James crossed the room so quickly that Sirius almost got whiplash. He hadn't expected the boy to
eagerly plop on his bed, “Yes, I do. Please let me explain or at least tell you my side.”
Sirius wanted to bite out the same thing he had been telling James for weeks, that he didn't care to
hear James’s excuses. However, that was basically the entire premise of this discussion so he just
nodded, “Fine, explain it to me.”

James let out a long breath before looking a little embarrassed. Sirius wondered why the boy
looked embarrassed now, even though he had been shamelessly sneaking out to see his brother all
week, without a single guilty expression.

“Okay, please let me get through this before you interrupt. I think that it will go a lot smoother that
way. The first thing you should know is…” He hesitated, running his fingers through his hair,
“Regulus and I didn't exactly date before we…. uhhhh ya know. We just kind of had this
undeniable chemistry, one minute we were arguing over quidditch, and the next we were snogging
in the quidditch locker rooms. I'd like to tell you that from then on we liked each other, but that
isn't really true. We hooked up a few more times after that before it became about feelings. Once
we both started to have feelings for eachother, everything progressed pretty quickly. I fell in love
fast, Sirius, embarrassingly fast. Luckily for me, so did Regulus. We told each other that we loved
each other on Halloween for the first time. Once we realized how strong our feelings for each other
were, there wasn't a hope of us ending it, even though I felt guilty about hiding it from you.”

Sirius didn't exactly enjoy hearing that his brother's first relationship started as a series of hookups
that turned into a relationship. He had forgotten that James had actually told him about the first
time he kissed Bunny, in fact, it was what gave him the courage to kiss Remus for the first time. So
he supposed in a twisted way he was grateful for that, but still, Regulus deserved flowers and stars,
not a sweaty locker room and a quick snog.

He broke James’ rule when the boy paused to take a breath, “What stopped you before Halloween
then? If not from breaking up, then what stopped you from telling me?”

James bit his lip slightly, looking guilty, “Honestly, your brother is the most attractive person at
Hogwarts and I admit the first couple of hookups were fueled by the desire to be close to him. I
think I sort of blocked out my guilt because I reasoned that it was nothing serious and wouldn't last
long. The more time we spent together, the more we talked and I realized how intelligent and
funny he was, in his own special way. It got to a point, fairly quickly, that I didn't want to lose him.
In my head, the moment you found out, he would bolt because you two had so many complicated
feelings for each other. Still, once we sort of made it official on Halloween, I wanted to tell you.
Not just because I felt guilty keeping this secret, but also because you are my best friend and I
wanted to share my first REAL love with you.”

Sirius nodded, feeling all kinds of conflict, “I wanted you to share it with me too, James. I think
that's why I got so hurt that you refused to tell me the identity of Bunny. Of course, I didn't realize
that you were genuinely worried about my reaction, I just thought you didn't think you could trust
me. That's what hurt me most of all.”

James shook his head, vehemently, “No, no of course I trusted you. You were the first person I
wanted to tell, but it just got so complicated after a while. First I didn't tell you because I didn't
think it was serious, then I was terrified I'd lose Regulus, then Regulus didn't want to tell anyone
including you, and as much as I would've trusted you with it in a minute, I didn't want to go against
his wishes. It would've been unfair for me to force him to come out, ya know? I told myself that at
least you knew I was seeing a boy, even though you didn't know who.”

Sirius supposed that made sense. Still, he thought James should've told him as soon as he kissed
Regulus, but he sort of was glad James had respected Regulus’s wishes like that. He would've been
forced to hex the man who made his brother come out when he wasn't ready, so he was glad James
was a gentleman.

“I just want you to know that I love you, Sirius. You are my best friend in the entire world,
practically my brother–”

Sirius butt in, only half joking, “If I'm your brother wouldn't that make your relationship with
Regulus incest?”

James’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped to gape at Sirius. Sirius couldn't help himself; he
burst out laughing. James looked so flabbergasted that he couldn't help but enjoy the look on his
face, even though the conversation was meant to be serious, “That–It is not incest! Regulus and I
are not related!”

Sirius rolled his eyes, “At least not closely, pureblood. Continue with your little monologue then.”

James struggled to get back on track, obviously still reeling from the accusation of incest.
Apparently James hadn't even considered the fact that every pureblood family in Britain was
related in some way. In fact, he was certain there was a Potter on the Black family tree tapestry. He
decided against saying this, as James might have an aneurysm.

“Right, I love you like….family. I never ever wanted you to feel like I didn't, my lies were in no
way a reflection of my feelings for you. I respect you so much, but I love your brother. I want to be
with him and I would like you to learn to be okay with that. I am truly sorry for the secrets and lies,
but I promise you, now that you know, there will not be anymore.”
There it was, an explanation, an apology, and a promise to never do it again all rolled into one.
What more could Sirius really ask for? He wasn't sure there was anything else James could do. He
did feel like he had a better understanding of James's actions now, which definitely helped but he
needed to ask a few questions first.

“Alright James, I have a few questions for you. I want you to answer them honestly.” James
nodded, immediately agreeing, so Sirius began, “Do you respect my brother and his reputation?”

James nodded, seriously, “Of course I do. Your brother is wonderful and I respect him about as
much as I could respect anyone.”

“And you are going to remember to always treat him with respect?”At James’s affirmative Sirius
continued his questioning, “Was there any point where you considered going behind Regulus’s
back and telling me anyways?”

“Oh every single day, but I don't think I ever actually would've, I was tempted though.”

Sirius liked the honesty, “I'm glad you respected my brother enough not to do that to him, though I
wish I wasn't left in the dark so long. Who was the first person you told, since it couldn't be me?”

James blushed slightly, “Uh my mom actually. I wrote to her about Regulus often and then Reggie
came home with me for Christmas after that disaster at Grimmauld Place.”

Now that was news to Sirius, Regulus had been to the Potters? He had met Effie and Monty? The
shock must have been evident as he asked, “He was at the house? He met Effie and Monty? What
did he think? Did they not like him? Is that why he refused to come to stay there over summer?”

James smiled slightly at Sirius’s questioning, before shaking his head, “No, they loved him. I think
he really likes them too. He even let my mom call him Reggie, which he almost never lets anyone
do. I think he just wanted to be in control of his plans, that's why he asked your uncle.”

Sirius nodded because he had felt similar when he was making his plans to leave Grimmauld.
“Okay last question, do you promise not to hurt my brother?”

James broke out in a grin, correctly assuming that Sirius was reluctantly giving his blessing, “Yes, I
would never hurt Regulus in a million years.”
“You better not, or you will have me to deal with James Potter,“ Sirius schooled his expression into
the best stern older brother impression he could. He reached out a hand for James to shake, “You
have my blessing, but please try not to flaunt it in front of me, it's going to take some getting used
to.”

James grinned and pulled him in for a hug and Sirius wondered how long it would take him to feel
completely comfortable around James again.

He gave James his blessing, primarily because he knew they were going to continue dating
anyways and he supposed it was better to try to acclimate than resist the inevitable. He also could
see how happy the two made each other and they both clearly had mutual respect for each other.
Really, that's all he ever wanted for his brother and for James, he just had not realized they would
find it in each other.

Now he just had to forget that they were regularly shagging and maybe he'd be over it before next
Christmas. Fuck, he really needed a smoke.

*****************************************************************

Regulus

Regulus was walking with a skip in his step, he was almost finished with his OWL exams and he
was feeling fairly confident. He was nowhere near as stressed about the results as he had been at
the beginning of the year. The weight of his parent's displeasure was no longer suffocating him.
Now, the only person he had to impress was himself.

He still wanted to do good of course, because he wanted to have a wide variety of careers to choose
from. That being said he was no longer petrified that the results wouldn't be as good as he wanted.
He hadn't studied nearly as much as the other students had for them, yet he still felt pretty good
about the work he had done. The teachers had been more lenient with his study restriction, as the
OWLs were coming up but he found he didn't really need the leniency. While other students
crammed information into their heads, he just did a light review and called it good.

Still, he could not wait until the whole ordeal was over. James and he had agreed not to meet up
while the exams were taking place, so it had been almost three days since he’d snogged his
boyfriend, an eternity. The two of them had been meeting each other every day, sometimes twice a
day, since the quidditch finals. So, these last couple of days without James had been unpleasant.

Regulus had been overjoyed that James had wanted to meet so often once Sirius had found out. He
had been worried that James would withdraw after Sirius’s little episode, but now he seemed to
take every opportunity to see Regulus. Regulus knew that it was tough for James after the incident,
with Sirius ignoring him, but the two of them had recently talked. James wouldn't divulge details of
the conversation that took place but he did tell Regulus that everything was going to work out, so
Regulus assumed they made up.

James had been particularly perky once they had that discussion and for Regulus the feeling was
infectious. Then, of course, exams came and they agreed to take a few days to focus on studying
again, but Regulus knew James would be even happier once they were finished.

He only had his History of Magic exam left, one that he really didn't stress about in the slightest.
He had about an hour and a half to review before the exam began, so he decided to head outside to
do so. Some people were already finished with exams and were celebrating on the beautiful nearly
summer day. Regulus found himself a place by an oak tree and spread out his materials to begin.
There were some third years down by the lake not too far from him, he could hear their splashing
and giggling, but he found he didn't mind.

Otherwise, the students were spread far enough away that he found it easy to slip into his review.
He was deep into the Grindylow Infestation of 1302 when he heard the footsteps. He looked up,
expecting to see a first-year walking by or something, but no, it was Nathaniel Rowle. He wasted
no time at all, plopping on the grass across from Regulus, his expression one of mirth, well as
much as it could be with his blank dead stare.

Regulus was taken off guard for a minute, not understanding the boy's sudden appearance.
However, it didn't take him long before he was scrambling up and snatching everything he could,
desperate to get away from the creep.

He was nearly to his feet, arms filled with loose parchment and books, when Rowle spoke in that
low voice that sent a shiver down Regulus’s spine, “I wouldn't leave if I were you.”

Regulus was ready to ignore him completely and continue his escape, but the words made him
curious. He bit out, as viciously as he could, “And why is that?”

Rowle quirked an eyebrow at the tone, Regulus glared even harder at the boy, “Well if I was
shagging a blood traitor, I might be a little worried who knows about it.”
Regulus’s blood froze. It was impossible, he couldn't know. How could he of all people know
about James and him? Regulus slowly sat back down, his mind racing a mile a minute. Rowle
seemed to think this meant he had Regulus’s attention, his voice came out mocking, “Good boy.”

Regulus felt sick at those words. Rowle made him physically ill, but at the moment he had no
choice but to pay attention to him.

Regulus didn't speak, unsure what to say and he certainly didn't want to provide Rowle with more
ammo against him. Rowle didn't seem to mind Regulus's silence as he spoke in a superior tone,
“That's right, Black, I know about you and Potter. I know that you have been with him since at
least Halloween. I know that you let that dirty blood traitor fuck you like some muggle whore. I
know that you went to Potter's house for Christmas. I know that you love him.”

He said love as if it was the most absurd thing he had ever heard, and it seemed so unnatural
coming from someone like Rowle. Like a word so beautiful was never meant to touch the lips of a
monster like Rowle.

Rowle, he fucking knew way too much. It made him sick to hear him call James a blood traitor and
him a muggle whore. How? He just didn't understand how Rowle could possibly know, especially
about where he spent Christmas.

His voice came out unsteady as he asked, “What do you want, Rowle?”

Rowle’s eyes seemed to glitter maliciously, “I don't like Potter or any blood traitor. You can be
forgiven for your misdeeds as you are just a dumb cockwhore, who picked the first guy he saw.”
Regulus’s stomach plummeted, how dare Rowle call him that. “Blood traitors are almost as bad as
mudbloods and I won't have Potter corrupting yet another pureblood with his ridiculous values.
No, Potter has done enough damage to the Black family line, he can't be allowed to corrupt the
heir.”

Regulus was shifting from fearful to angry rapidly. Rowle was insane, that much was clear by his
ramblings, but the fact that he had targeted James as the problem was unacceptable. He gritted his
teeth, “Stop calling him that.”

Rowle laughed, he actually fucking laughed. Regulus had hardly ever seen an emotion pass onto
his face and he had never seen the boy laugh. His laugh was booming and louder than one would
expect, Regulus hated it.
“Now Reggie, play nice.” Regulus began to object to the nickname, but Rowle quickly silenced
him, “Oh that's right you don't like to be called that, well except by Potter of course. I find that I
don't much care what you want, so I am going to continue calling you Reggie. Now back to what I
was saying. Potter can't be allowed to corrupt you anymore, it's time you ended it with him. You
end it with him and then you start acting like a good little pureblood. You support the dark lord just
like the rest of us, or at the very least not fight against him. That is what I want, Black. I want you
to break up with the blood traitor and start acting like a proper heir.”

Regulus gaped at Rowle, unbelieving of what he was hearing. Rowle wanted him to break up with
James so that he could be a proper heir. Since when did Rowle give a shit about proper pureblood
behavior. He was the farthest thing from a proper pureblood. And how did it make any sense for
him to break up with James just so Rowle didn't tell everyone about him and James? It made no
sense at all.

He scoffed, finally coming to a conclusion, “You are off your fucking rocker, Rowle.”

Rowle just raised an eyebrow, questioning, “Is that a refusal?”

Regulus blinked at the boy, was he fucking slow or something, “Of course, it's a refusal. There is
no way I am breaking up with the person I love because for some reason you decided to single-
handedly rescue pureblood culture.”

Rowle tilted his head, silent for a moment before speaking again, “So you don't mind if I tell
everyone about you and the blood traitor. You don't mind if I tell your entire family?”

Regulus gritted his teeth at the threat, he would not budge. It's not as if he particularly wanted to be
shoved out of the closet to the entire world, but if he were to stay with James, which he had every
intention of doing, then it would happen eventually anyways. As much as he didn't want to let
Rowle manipulate him and spread the truth to everyone he knew, when the only person he cared to
come out to only just found out. He certainly wasn't going to let Rowle break him and James up.

His voice was terse when he responded, but he tried to sound confident, “Go ahead. I will not be
manipulated by you, Rowle. If you are so dead set on telling everyone, then do it.”

There was the ghost of a smile on Rowle's lips, not there but Regulus could almost see it, when
Rowle responded sardonically, “Wow Reggie and here I thought you were in love with Potter,
maybe you haven't strayed as far from the path as I thought.”
Now that confused Regulus, he had expected Rowle to be furious and sullen but instead, he seemed
to enjoy Regulus’s stubborn behavior. Why did he look to be enjoying this so much? Hadn’t his
plan failed? What did he mean that Regulus didn't love James? “What the hell are you on about?”

Rowle pulled up a few pieces of grass and began twirling them in his fingers as he spoke, “Oh I
see, you just aren't as bright as everyone says.” Regulus huffed not appreciating having his
intelligence mocked, “You’re the son of the house of Black, the head of the household, in fact.
That gives you a certain amount of liberty in decision-making for the family. You are under the
impression that it makes you invincible to your family. They can't go against you because you hold
the purse, but from what I heard, your father bestowed allowances to everyone, meaning legally
you have to provide funds no matter what. This means you really can't hold money over their head,
yet you still run the family so they wouldn't dare touch you, less the heirdom falls to Sirius, which
they find even more distasteful. The protection the title gives you does not extend to your loved
ones. Sirius, Crouch, the filthy half-blood, and your blood traitor boyfriend. Imagine the hatred
your family feels for you, the way you humiliated the family and then happily took control of
everything. They are unable to take their revenge on you, but they discover that the Potter boy is
your boyfriend. Suddenly there is the perfect opportunity to reach you through him. They could
even keep him alive, just using him as leverage to get you to make the decisions they want for the
Black family. And Potter, poor Potter is caught in the crossfire, paying for your mistakes all
because he fell in love with his best friend's younger brother. Hell, it might not even be just your
family after him. I know a lot of pureblood families that despise the way you made a mockery of
the pureblood institution, it's very likely they will come after him too. When that happens, when
Potter is tortured because of you, I want you to remember this moment and remember that you
could have prevented it all.”

Regulus couldn't breathe, like he physically couldn't suck in enough air to function. He must have
looked like a sight gasping for air. His eyes were wide and his heart was pumping so fast it felt like
it was going to pop out of his chest. Panic attack, that was the word for it. He had never had a
panic attack, but he knew it from a muggle book he read.

Rowle had no reaction to the gasping and flailing of the boy in front of him, uncaring that the
Regulus couldn't fucking breathe. He just stood up and dusted off his slacks, looking down at
Regulus, “I'll leave you to rethink your decision. Just let me know on the train, what you decide. I
wouldn't want to spread the word if you do end up making the right decision. Until next time,
Black.”

With that, he walked away and Regulus was left to struggle. He tried to remember the book, and
what the protagonist had done during the panic attack. He remembered them saying something, but
the thought he couldn't remember. He didn't know how long the panic attack lasted, but the answer
came to him rather suddenly. He closed his gasping mouth and pinched his nose, effectively
shutting off his breath. He held his breath tell he physically couldn't any longer and released,
surprisingly he felt better. He just sat there for a few minutes catching his breath and letting his
heartbeat return to normal.
A quick cast of tempus told him, he now only has ten minutes to get to his exam. So he quickly
packed his things and headed to the classroom, his mind racing. As much as Regulus tried to
consider different alternatives, he was beginning to feel hopeless. Every alternative he considered
would require some serious out-character reactions from other parties to be at all valid. If his
family decided they didn't hate him anymore and had no problem with him seeing a blood traitor.
If Rowle decided that he didn't want to ruin Regulus’s life by telling everyone and effectively
painting a target on James’s back. If he could convince James to run away with him and hide so he
was safe.

All of these were as unlikely as the next; his family was cruel, Rowle was cruel, and James would
never leave his friends and family behind. James planned to fight in the war, to be against the dark
lord, which would put him perfectly in reach of any death eaters that had a vendetta. Sure he would
be safe another year at Hogwarts, but after that, there was no way for Regulus to guarantee his
safety. And if their target was James, there was no guarantee that they wouldn't come after any of
James’s loved ones to get to him, to capture James. If James knew anyone was in danger then he
would come looking for them, even if it would mean his death, the boy was too noble for his own
good.

The problem was that James had so many loved ones, Sirius, Pettigrew, Lupin, his parents,
Mckinnon, McDonald, Evans, and who even knew how much-extended family he had. Even if he
could get James to hide, he wouldn't be able to join the war effort, or the quidditch league, or even
see most of his loved ones often. James would be forced to live a sheltered life because Regulus
was too selfish to let him live without him.

As Regulus sat down for the exam, all he could think about was how he would have to break up
with James and how someday he would kill Nathaniel Rowle.

***************************************************************

Regulus

The moment Regulus saw James, was the moment he realized that it was over. Normally when he
saw James, his heart would sing and everything bad that was going on would be pushed to the back
burner. This time when he saw that messy black hair and those hazel eyes, his stomach dropped
and he felt nauseous.

Not that any of that was James’s fault, no of course it wasn't, James was perfect. Unfortunately, the
world was too imperfect for someone like James, and Regulus was about to prove that to him.

James arrived at the Room of Requirement right on schedule and for once Regulus wished he
would've been late. James grinned at him and immediately walked into his space, and kissed him.
His hands cupped Regulus’s cheeks delicately and the kiss was like a breath of fresh air.

Regulus responded quickly, trying to push all his thoughts to the back of his mind for the moment.
This was more than likely going to be the last time he ever got to kiss James Potter and he was
going to enjoy it for all its worth. He sunk into the feeling of his lips and all too soon James was
pulling back, looking at him with a grin. A grin that told Regulus that he had no idea what was
about to happen, Regulus's stomach clenched tightly, so tightly the muscles ached.

“Hey, baby. I'm sorry for the abrupt kiss but honestly, you have no idea how much I missed you
these last few days.” James spoke in a light cheery tone and the guilt rose in Regulus.

“It's okay,“ Regulus mumbled, James was still holding his face and Regulus could feel the boy's
breath on his lips. Merlin, he was going to miss this. It took everything in him not to lean into
James' hands, that would only confuse the Gryffindor.

“So tell me, how were your exams? Did not seeing me pay off and allow you to kick arse on the
OWL's?” James spoke with bright eyes, his tone amused.

Regulus shrugged, unsure how much he should really say, “They went well I think. I won't know
till I get the scores back, I suppose.”

“Oh come on Reg, you know you did great. A little genius like you probably got the best scores in
your year, and you were the only one that had a limit of their studying hours.”

“Yeah, because none of them passed out on a staircase from exhaustion a month into school,”
Regulus mumbled, feeling dumb.

James smiled softly at him before kissing his forehead and leaning back slightly. This allowed
some distance that Regulus desperately needed. Still, it wasn't enough, there wasn't enough space
between them for Regulus to properly think, so he took a step back from James. It was the most
difficult step he had ever taken. It felt as if he was walking through wet cement. The extra bit of
room he got certainly helped clear his mind a little, but it also meant that he was forced to focus on
his task.

James frowned as Regulus stepped away from him, confusion spread across his face. He took a
step closer and Regulus reluctantly stepped back again, this was hard enough without James at
arm's length. “What's wrong, Reggie?”

Here it was, the moment that Regulus had been dreading ever since that disgusting bastard Rowle
spoke James’s name. The problem was Regulus wasn't even sure how to do it. He had been
pondering that thought since about halfway through his History of Magic OWL and still hadn't
thought of a good way to do it, but it had to be done. The sooner the better for James’s sake.

He could tell James that they were too different from each other but really when had that ever been
a problem for them. They were very different but they had never struggled to make conversation
with each other and their differences hadn't stopped them from falling in love. There was no way
James would accept that one without a fight.

He could tell James that he found someone else, but honestly how unbelievable is that. Even if
Regulus could find someone while still deep in the closet, who the hell could he find that was
better than James Potter. He doubted that he would ever find someone as great as James Potter to
love him and he certainly hasn't found him in Hogwarts of all places. Still, if James wasn't feeling
too cocky he might buy it, but then he would wanna know who and that causes a whole myriad of
problems.

James would, of course, want to know who it was that Regulus had met. If Regulus knew James
the way he believed he did, the boy would never drop it until he got a satisfactory answer. Even if
Regulus did give him a name, he knew James would seek the person out and ask them. Which
would result in them telling him that it wasn't true and then James would be back demanding an
answer.

He supposed that he could ask Barty to back him up, James had been jealous enough of the flirting
Barty liked to pull out around his boyfriend. That didn't feel right though, knowing that he had told
James that there was nothing between them, now only to turn around and dump him with the
reason being that he had fallen for Barty Crouch. Even if that thought didn't make him feel
physically ill there were still plenty of problems with that plan.

Barty would definitely back him up, but he would demand an answer and he was much too good at
reading Regulus to be fed a lie. If Regulus told Barty about Rowle and the blackmail, his friend
might end up in Azkaban for murder. As much as he wanted to kill Rowle, he didn't want Barty to
go down for it, especially in his defense. So that option was out too.
He could tell James that he didn't love him anymore, which was such a lie it hurt to even think
about. He still loved James, of course, he did. James was everything good in his life, the only thing
that made him truly happy. Barty and Remy did too, but it wasn't in the same way. James was the
only person Regulus had ever told, that he loved them. Not Barty, Not Remy, not Evan, not his
parents, not even Sirius, just James Potter.

He wasn't sure he would even be able to get out that sentence, he had never had a problem with
lying before but the fact that he could barely consider it made him think it was impossible to say
those words to the hazel eyes.

He didn't know what to do, truly he was so lost, but he knew he had to do this for James’s sake.
Regulus was not an unselfish person by any means. He wanted James so badly that he had almost
told Rowle to fuck off earlier. If it was just him on the line then he would be selfish, he would keep
James forever. Even if Rowle wasn't in the picture, James was in danger as long as the Black
family was still around. They would never allow the head of the Black house to be with a blood
traitor let alone a boy that he couldn't even reproduce with. They would hunt him down, and James
would never be safe as long as he was with Regulus.

Even more than that, no one James loved would be safe either. His family, the maniacs that they
were, would hunt down everyone James loved until Regulus yielded. Even if he never did, even if
they went in hiding along with everyone James loved, and that was quite a long list, he would be
robbing James of a life.

Yes, he knew that James wanted to be with him, that he wanted to have a life with Regulus, but
James also wanted kids, a house, and a family, and Regulus couldn't give that to him. At least not
the way things were now. It was unfair that Regulus didn't get to be with the only person he knew
for sure that he loved, but it was even less fair to subject James to a life full of secrecy and hiding.

That thought spurred him forward, but the words felt like syrup in his mouth, “James I– James I
c–” James stepped forward and this time Regulus let him, still trying to get his words out, the boy
grabbed both of Regulus’s hands softly. He still stayed a bit away but the contact made Regulus
long to live in a different world where bad guys didn't exist and he had a different last name.
Regulus took a deep breath, then looked directly into James’s eyes, “James I– I can't do this
anymore.”

James’s eyebrow furrowed and he looked even more perplexed than he had before, “Do what?
What can't you do, Reg? I can help you with anything.”

Fuck, why did James make this so hard? Why couldn't he be a shitty boyfriend who ignored him
and made backhanded compliments to his face? Instead, his boyfriend was fucking perfect.
Regulus didn't respond right away, which he knew was a terrible thing to do, but he was struggling
to hold his tears in and could risk speaking right away. They would begin to pour any moment if he
didn't stop them so he let James sit here with that comment for the moment. He grits his teeth,
holding back tears with all his might.

It was funny how he had seemed to forget the training he had all his life this year. Blacks don't cry,
was the mantra his mother had drilled into his head all his life. Though Sirius had done everything
in his capability to encourage Regulus’s feelings behind her back. He had managed to abide by her
little rule for years, with little to no incidents at least in front of someone, but this year he had cried
more times than he could count. He had been weak in front of James before, and the boy never
seemed to think less of him because of his tears.

That thought alone made Regulus want to let out all the tears he had been holding onto. He wanted
to bury his face in James’s chest and just sob while his nounours held him. He hasn't cried since
Rowle spoke to him, though he did manage to break about a million things in the Room of
Requirement last night. He wouldn't allow himself to cry, he had to be strong for James. He had to
do something he hated to make sure James would be happy. He had to abide by his mother's rule
one last time, for James.

It wouldn't be fair to James to start crying when he was about to break his heart and his Regulus’s
in the process. He couldn't imagine how confusing for James it would be if Regulus began sobbing
while telling James it over. James would more than likely not believe that he meant it, that he truly
wanted it. Of course, he didn't, but he needed James to leave here today believing they were over
for good. He needed James to be safely out of his and his family's reach before summer. He
couldn’t afford to be selfish this time.

Finally once Regulus had managed to get a hold of his emotions he looked back up into those eyes
and nearly froze at the fear he saw in them. James hadn't spoken while Regulus raced with his own
thoughts, but that was because his own mind had been searching for the answer. Apparently,
whichever thought he landed on scared the shit out of him.

“I can't do– I don't want— I think we should break up.” His chest began to throb violently and even
though any mediwitch or muggle doctor would tell him it was impossible, he knew that his heart
was physically breaking.

James’s was too, apparently, his face crumpled instantly. It was as if someone had poked a hole in
a helium balloon for how quickly he deflated. The person who had bounded confidently into the
room without a care in the world, was gone. Regulus hated the disbelief on the boy's face. A
million emotions flashed, the main one being sorrow. Regulus had just a moment to hope that
James wouldn't ask for a reason because Regulus genuinely did not know what to say, before he
was speaking, his face had landed on determined for the moment, “No, no you don't mean that.
You’re just stressed, you don't actually want to break up.”

Fuck, of course, he didn't want to break up with James, but he needed James to believe that he has
gotten to this thought on his own. If James believed for a minute that anyone else convinced him of
this then he would not let it go. As much as it killed him, he needed James to let it go, to let him go.

Regulus pulled his hands away from James, just now realizing that the boy was still clutching
them. He took a step back and schooled his expression in the most Walpurga look he could
manage. He hoped his face portrayed the level of indifference that he was going for as he spoke as
steadily as he possibly could, “Yes I do, James. Why would I be stressed when exams are over? I
want to break up.”

James’s expression twisted, starting to look unsure, “Why then? If it's because you're the head of
your family, then it's unnecessary. I would never dream of getting in the way of your business. If
it's– if it's because you believe that you will need to find a pureblood wife… that's okay too. I–I
can't promise you that I won't spend every moment trying to convince you that you don't need one,
but I– I would still be there if you decided you did.”

James trailed off, the pleading in his tone bleeding through Regulus’s defenses and he wanted
nothing more than to throw up. The last thing he wanted was for James Potter to beg him, for
anything let alone the possibility of being his…consort. Really wasn't that what James was saying?
If Regulus felt he needed a wife, he would still be with him. The thought sickened Regulus. James
Potter was not meant to be in the background of a marriage, hiding in shadows and secret trysts.
No, James Potter was meant to be the center of the stage in a relationship. He should be showered
with flowers and pretty words, no one should ever be ashamed to be seen with him.

Regulus wasn't going to marry a pureblood wife. While Rowle was correct that Regulus would be
painting a target on James’s back for every pureblood fanatic he knew, there was nothing that
could make him bed a woman. He was certain that wasn't Rowle's intention anyways, his
intentions would undoubtedly be much more sinister. Regulus couldn't care less if the Black family
came for him once he denied taking a wife. He just couldn't allow them to come for James, ever.

It was the perfect out really, the two of them had had this exact conversation months ago. When
Regulus’s father died, he had gone a little, unhinged. He had started spouting bullshit about his
duty and that had made James undeniably angry. They had moved past the argument, though
Regulus had never managed to tell James that he had no intention of following those duties. After
Sirius found out about them, things had been focused on that crisis rather than the previous one, so
that conversation had been pushed to the back burner. Now he was glad that they had never had it.

“What do you mean, James?”

James stepped forward and reached out a hand to Regulus, but dropped it when Regulus pulled
away, “I mean, that if you decided that you need to do that. If–If that would make you happy then I
would come with you. I come with you wherever you need me. I love you, Regulus.”

Fuck, why did James make this so hard? Regulus didn't want James to follow him into a life that he
would hate. He wanted James to have the life he deserved. Regulus knew that this was going to
hurt worse than any of it, but he knew James wouldn't believe him if he wasn't cruel, “So what,
you're going to be my mistress? You are going to wait in my bed every night to be fucked while I
spend the day with my wife and kids? You'd actually be happy doing that? You would feel as if
you were satisfied with your life?”

James flinched at the curse and he looked miserable as he opened his mouth, likely to agree, but
Regulus was quicker, “Do you know how fucked up that is? It's unhealthy, you are sixteen, and
you're trying to throw away your life for me? Hell, I won't even be sixteen for a couple more
weeks, do you really think that either of us are truly in love? Here you are making a declaration
about the future when you haven't even finished school. You have no idea what the real world is
like and I refuse to be consumed by your fantasies any longer.”

Regulus had to bite off his monologue as the pressure in his throat foretold a coming sob. His eyes
itched with his need for tears and his stomach churned with the injustice of it all. He didn't enjoy
being cruel to James, not even a little bit. James didn't deserve it in the slightest, but he needed
James to understand that his fantasies of their lives weren't going to happen.

There it was, a single tear had fallen from James’s face and it made Regulus want to crumple in on
himself. James spoke, his voice fragile and unsteady, “You don't love me?”

Regulus turned immediately, unable to control his expression at those words. Of course, James had
taken everything he just said and came out with that. Regulus hadn't really even meant to say it,
mostly because he didn't believe he could to James's face like that. It had slipped out in his attempt
to make James seem like a schoolboy with a crush.

He allowed himself a second to scrunch his face up in pain before he felt a hand on his shoulder.
He turned abruptly and he quickly morphed his expression into one of indifference. James’s face
was everything but indifferent, pain was the everpresent expression.

His voice was slightly firmer as he asked once more, but Regulus could see a trail of tears on his
cheeks, “Regulus, you don't love me?”
Regulus let out a shaky expression before answering the boy, “I think I thought I did.” Lie. “But
really I think you were just the first person who gave me enough attention.” Lie. “I– I'm fifteen,
James. I don't want to be in this serious of a relationship. I don't want to feel as if I'll be
disappointing you with every decision I make. I don't think I want the same future as you and more
importantly, I don't think I want you to be in my future.” Big fucking lie.

James’s expression shattered, and his voice came out pleading, “I'm sorry Reg. I'm sorry if it
seemed like I was pushing you or something. I never meant to, I swear. I can change, I promise.
We can still– I can be better. Reggie please, just give me another chance. We can take a step back,
we don't have to be as serious, please.”

Regulus turned his head from James, unable to watch him any longer. Merlin this was so fucking
hard. Regulus wanted to run away and write James a note or something, finishing the breakup but
he knew that was neither fair nor likely to work.

“James enough, I am not asking you to change. You are a great person, but you are just not the
person for me. Do you understand?”

James did not understand, his expression was shattering Regulus’s sturdily built walls and all he
wanted to do was hug James tightly. “I–but I– What if you're the person for me? What if you are
the only person I will ever love?”

Regulus faked a scoff, “Please James, you fell in love with Lily Evans on sight. I think you can
find someone else to fall for soon enough. You have a habit of falling for anyone who glares at
you. I'm sure it won't take you long at all.”

Ohh that was cruel of him. Throwing back James’s previous infatuation in his face. It was unfair,
but Regulus needed to properly sever their ties before James left today. The tears on James’s face
thickened and Regulus felt fucking awful, “That's not– That's not true, Regulus. I'm in love with
you, I'm not just going to get over that. I thought you loved me too. That's what you told me.”

Regulus gritted his teeth, this was going to destroy James. He shrugged as if he didn't have care in
the world, “Well I lied. It was more like intense lust, but to be honest, I'm bored now James. I think
it's time I find someone else to entertain me. Sorry that you got caught up in the affair, but honestly
you should've known better than to fall for a Black.”

James looked fucking wrecked, Regulus caught the sobbing sound that James tried to hide, “I
guess I should've.”

Regulus nodded, that was it, he had done it. James would never want to be with him again,
therefore he was safe. He started to walk by James and was startled when the boy grabbed his arm,
“That's it? You’re just going to leave now? No other conversation?”

Regulus swallowed down his emotions not even looking at James, “I don't think there's anything
left to say, Potter. You can keep the stuff I gave you as mementos, but honestly, you shouldn't
dwell on the memories, I certainly won't be.” Biggest lie he ever told.

James released him and Regulus quickly stormed out of the room. The minute and I mean the
minute he turned the corner he started sobbing uncontrollably. He had done it, he had kept James
safe, but in doing so he had doomed himself to a lonely life. He hurried as fast as he could through
the corridors, not present enough in his mind to take back stairwells on his way to the dungeons.
This meant that many people were present for the little breakdown he was partaking in. A couple
people tried to stop him, probably curious as to why Regulus Black of all people was crying while
running through the corridors.

He rushed through the common room, which was unfortunately full of people. He just barely
caught the eye of Rowle before he hurried to his dormitory. Luckily Evan wasn't there, but Barty
was and the moment his eyes set on Regulus they darkened. Regulus rushed over to him and threw
his arms around his friend and began sobbing uncontrollably into his chest.

Barty didn't speak for a long time, just letting Regulus cry on him while they sat on his bed.
Regulus didn't think Barty and him had ever really hugged each other, but there was no doubt they
were now. Regulus isn't sure how long he sat there like that, but he vaguely remembered the door
opening and Barty telling someone to piss off, Evan more than likely. Even after it was physically
impossible for him to cry any longer, his body was still wracked with dry sobs against his friend.

After a long time, Regulus calmed, at least physically. He had tired himself out so much that all he
could do was lean on his friend. Only then did Barty speak, and it was in a surprisingly soft voice,
“What happened?”

Regulus shook his head, he did not want to talk about it. So instead Barty changed tactics, “Are you
okay?’

Regulus shook his head because he was far from alright. This did not relax Barty in the slightest,
Regulus could feel the tension in his muscles. When he spoke his voice came out raspy, which told
him he was sobbing for a long time, “James and I broke up.”
The tension did not release, in fact he almost became rigid at those words, “I'm going to kill him.”

Regulus sucked in a breath, and his heart panged. He had lost James, but he hadn't lost Barty. Barty
would always have his back and that made him feel safe. Still, he had to let Barty know it wasn't
James’s fault because the last thing he needed was for Barty to get involved.

“No.” His voice croaked, “No, I broke up with him.”

Regulus couldn't see his friend's expression but he could imagine the confusion on Barty’s face, he
knew how Regulus felt about James. Still, he didn't argue, he just simply asked, “Why?”

Regulus buried his face into Barty’s chest, and his voice came out a bit muffled, “It was too hard.
Everything that's been going on, it was too much to have a boyfriend on top of that.”

Barty sounded concerned, “But he made you happy right? I would think with everything going on
it's best to surround yourself with people who make you happy.”

Regulus sighed, because of course Barty was right, “I just– I just have so much on my plate. James
was just causing me more stress, it was time to break it off with him.”

There was a beat of silence between the two, and Regulus thought maybe he had convinced Barty,
“Then why did you come back here crying if breaking up with him was supposed to relieve all this
stress?”

Regulus didn't say anything, he didn't really have a response to that. Luckily Barty didn't push,
though it was clear he knew that Regulus was lying to him. In that silence, with the feel of Barty’s
heart beating strongly against his chest, Regulus felt himself drifting to sleep.

That night, his dreams were filled with images of James.

***********************************************

Sirius
Sirius was lying on Moony’s bed, tossing a ball into the air and catching it, in an epic show of
boredom. Moony was down at the library, he still had one more exam the next day. Peter and
Mary were downstairs playing quidditch chess, but Sirius found he had no desire to watch them.
James was off with Regulus, because of course why wouldn't he be? After James and his talk, he
was feeling slightly better about that whole relationship, knowing that they both had respect and
love for each other. Still, he was uncomfortable at the idea, but he was trying to be better.

He was in the middle of contemplating an idea he had for a prank when it happened. One minute he
was bored to tears, basically begging for entertainment and the next he wished he could be back to
his boring afternoon.

Sirius jumped when the door to the dorm was suddenly thrown open and slammed shut. He sat up
and peeked around the curtains of the bed, and he felt a chill go down his spine. James had been
the one to come into the room, but he hadn't made it more than a foot into the room before he had
sunk to the ground, curling in on himself. He was crying heavily, Sirius tried to remember a time
James had cried so hard, but in their six years of friendship, he couldn't remember a time.

He was frozen as he watched the sobbing boy slam one hand repeatedly on the wood floor while
the other fisted his hair tightly. He was going to hurt himself if he continued like that. And that
was the only thought in his mind as he quickly rose from the bed and hurried over to James. He
crouched down in front of his friend, lightly grabbing his hands to stop him from continuing their
warpath.

James looked up at Sirius, not having realized anyone was in the room. Sirius hated the teary look
of misery on his friend's face, which usually held joy and mischief. It took James only a minute
before he was burying his face into Sirius’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around his friend tightly.
Sirius fell back slightly at the sudden force of a hug, but he embraced his friend once his bearings
were together.

He was surprised when James spoke into his shoulder, his voice rough from crying, “Well you got
what you wanted.”

Sirius frowned down at the mass of black hair on his shoulder. What the hell did that mean? “What
are you talking about?”

James pulled back and looked at him with a particular look of misery in his eyes, “Regulus broke
up with me. So I guess that news would thrill you, right? You never wanted us together in the first
place.”
Sirius had not been expecting that at all. Regulus had broken up with James? That made absolutely
no sense, Regulus had just sent him a letter gushing about how much he loved James. Why the hell
would he dump him now when he hadn't wanted to a week ago? James had been going off to see
him every night this week, how was it possible that something had happened that quickly to change
his feelings. ‘

“Did he say why?” Sirius hesitated before asking, knowing James was particularly fragile at the
moment.

James snuffled, probably getting snot all over his shirt, Sirius tried to ignore that irrelevant thought.
“He– he said that he didn't love me, that he probably never loved me. That we were too young to
be serious and that he was bored of me now.”

Sirius sucked in a sharp breath, because fuck that was cruel. Although Regulus had sent him a letter
just a couple weeks prior, declaring his love for James, he could understand the boy being unsure
of that. Sirius had taken a very long time to reconcile his feelings for Remus too, it was sort of a
result of living without a loving family all your life. Regulus was young and he could understand
the boy being unsure of his feelings, though he certainly had been sure a couple weeks ago, he
could even understand not wanting a serious relationship right now. The thing he couldn’t
understand was why Regulus would tell James he was bored of him. That was cruel and unkind to
say to anyone, let alone someone with as big of a heart as James.

“He was telling me all of this as I practically begged him to reconsider, how pathetic is that? I
probably wouldn't think so if it had worked, but he just turned away as if I was too pitiful to look
at. His expression was blank the entire time, I'd never seen him look so emotionless. It's like he
didn't care at all that my world was falling apart.” James continued, rambling in a thick stuffy
voice.

Sirius had heard enough, or at least as much as he could possibly take at the moment, “James.”

James wasn't done though, it was like he was demanding Sirius listen. Sirius had no choice but to
comply as James went into excruciating detail about the breakup. How James had kissed Regulus
before he knew that anything was wrong. How the two of them had been perfectly fine the night
before but today Regulus couldn't get away fast enough. How James had offered himself on a
silver platter to Regulus and how Regulus’s only response was to mock him for wanting to be a
mistress. And finally, how he told James that he didn't want him in his future and promptly ran off.

Sirius was forced to sit and listen as his best friend in the world explained exactly how his brother
had broken his heart. Regulus had not been kind. Sirius had taken part in many breakups but he had
never experienced one where such cruel words were spoken, especially considering how long they
had been together. Sirius didn't like the idea of his baby brother, the one he seemed to finally be on
okay terms with, being cruel and heartless for no reason. It was too reminiscent of his parents and
that scared him.

*********************************************

Sirius

Sirius was on a mission, he had to find Regulus before the feast tonight or he wouldn't have another
chance to talk to his brother. He supposed it was possible to send a letter to Alphard's house but it
didn't feel the same. He wanted to look Regulus in the eyes as he talked to him, it felt like he would
be able to tell what was going on that way.

He glanced down at the map so he could verify that Regulus was still in the prefects' bathroom. It
didn't appear that anyone else was in there and James had given him the password earlier in the
year. Maybe it was a little rude to interrupt someone in the bathroom, but he found he didn't really
care at the moment.

When he got there, he was relieved to see Regulus wasn't in the bath or anything, because that
would've just added a weird layer to the conversation that needed to happen. No Regulus looked as
if he must've recently showered as he stood in front of a mirror fixing and styling his curls. Regulus
never liked to spell his hair dry, he said that it made it look frizzy. He made eye contact with
Regulus in the mirror.

To his credit, Regulus didn't look particularly surprised as he sighed and turned, crossing his arms,
“Sirius.”

“Regulus.” Sirius monotoned back, it was clear that Regulus knew why he was here. The last time
they had spoken it hadn't been the best, with Sirius calling him a slut. Before that they had actually
been on decent terms for once, he would like to end the year like that but he didn't know if that was
possible now.

It was clear Regulus was waiting for him to speak, he cleared his throat, “So you and James broke
up?”

Regulus stiffened slightly before nodding, his expression never changing, “Yes.”
Sirius examined his brother, curious as to why he was suddenly so proficient at masking his
emotions. He had never been very good at that when they were younger, though he certainly tried,
it sort of seemed that he had given up. He was much more free with his expressions, yet he was
trying to cover those emotions right now. He could feel guilty, which he should for the things he
said to James or he could be upset that Sirius had followed him to the bathroom.

He leaned against the wall closest to him, crossing his arms, “So, you wanna tell me why?”

Regulus huffed, looking supremely frustrated, before mirroring Sirius’s position against the sink,
“I'm sure James already told you. So why are you even here, Siri?”

Sirius felt his eyes soften at the familiar nickname. Regulus hadn’t called him that in years, which
meant he probably felt vulnerable. Regulus was smart, too smart for his own good, and sometimes
he liked to use his wit against people. Sirius was unsure if his theory was correct but he had a
feeling that Regulus was so terrible to James for a very specific reason. He wanted to get to the
bottom of it, for the happiness of both Regulus and James.

He carefully worded his words, “Why would James tell me anything, Reggie?”

His expression snapped from bored to confused, concern bleeding through that cold exterior,
“Didn't you make up?”

Ahh, so that was the problem, “No, of course not. I can't just forgive him for what he did.”

Regulus suddenly looked angry, which took Sirius by surprise, “He basically told me you made up.
Why the hell would he tell me that if you didn't? And why wouldn't you have made up by now?”

“I don't know, why would you tell James that he's boring? People say things sometimes.” He sent a
pointed look at Regulus, and the guilt etched his way back on his features. It appeared his
emotions had come back for the time being, which Sirius was grateful for.

Regulus pursed his lips, “That's irrelevant. James clearly told you plenty, so either he lied to me
that you made up or you're lying to me now. Which is it?”
Sirius rolled his eyes, too smart for his own good, “Can't it be both, you both are such good liars I
thought I would give it a try.”

Regulus gritted his teeth, shooting a glare at Sirius, “I never lied to you.”

Sirius scoffed, “No, of course you didn't, but only because we never talked. James lied to my face
for months all because he was so petrified to lose what he had with you. Isn't it ironic that only a
week later you were the one lying to him while you dumped him?”

An emotion Sirius couldn't recognize flashed in Regulus’s eyes and for the first time in years,
Sirius didn't feel as if he could even hazard a guess at the boy's current thoughts. Regulus had
always been sort of an open book to Sirius, even when they hadn't been talking. He could always
sort of tell what the boy was thinking, but now he didn't recognize the expression on his little
brother's face.

“You sure are making a lot of assumptions today, got any more you'd like to share?” Regulus
drawled sardonically.

Regulus wasn't being serious, but he found he didn't care, “Yes actually, I think you broke up with
James for a reason completely different than the one you gave him. I think everything you told him
was bullshit. I think you were lying your ass off, but James was too heartbroken to realize.”

Regulus’s expression was suddenly deadpan once more, the boy had shut Sirius out of his
emotions. Sirius had not actually realized that Regulus lied so totally to James until he got here.
The brief snippet of emotions he got from Regulus told him everything.

“You think you got it all figured out, don't you?”

Sirius pushed off from the wall and walked towards his brother, his face going sympathetic, “Yes I
do, listen Reg, if this is because of me I can tell you right now that it's not worth it. I am starting to
be okay with the two of you, I promise. If you are doing this all because you want James and me to
be friends again, stop because we already were friends. I think it's very noble of you, but also you
really hurt James in the process. I think that if you apologize to him and explain then he will
forgive you. If you did it for any other reason, just tell me, and we can work it out. I love you Reg
and James does too.”

As soon as the word love left his lips, Regulus’s eyes went icy. He fixed a smirk on his face,
walking toward his brother. When Sirius and he were within a foot of each other he let out a snort
of laughter. Sirius was confused, why the hell was Regulus laughing?

His voice was cruel as he spoke, the tone similar to the one their mother used when she had caught
them in a lie as children, “Oh wow, that was a sweet little monologue, Sirius. Truly I can already
feel my icy heart melting. The thing is you got it wrong, I did lie but not for the reason you think. I
lied to spare James’s feelings believe it or not. The things I said were just meant to make him feel
better about me dumping him. I was in no way dumping him to help the two of you mend fences.
That's why I sent you that letter in the first place, I wanted you to know that I had no intention of
ending it because of you.”

Sirius didn't like the mocking tone Regulus was using, and he really didn't like that Regulus felt
that he had gone easy on James. He was more confused than ever, “Yet you did end it two weeks
later, it's just weird timing I think. And how exactly did you go easy on James? You told him he
was boring and that you lied about loving him, not exactly a gentle breakup.”

Regulus chuckled and the iciness of the moment brought a chill down his spine, “The timing of
that was interesting, that's true, but I think maybe it was the excitement of hiding it from you that
was the real killer. Now, I'm fairly certain that the only reason James seemed exciting to me for so
long was that you had no idea. We were doing it behind your back. Every lie he told just so you
didn't know he was fucking your brother, just added to the excitement of it all.”

Sirius’s blood ran cold at those words. The idea that his brother had enjoyed keeping this from him
for so long because he found it thrilling was hurtful. The fact that his brother enjoyed that James
was lying and hiding things from Sirius made him feel ill. He managed his own quippy remark, “Is
that why every time he asked to go public, you said no. You enjoyed hurting me so much that you
wanted him to suffer too.”

“Oh no, I never wanted James to suffer.” Regulus stared directly into Sirius’s eyes, gray on gray,
his voice steady. “The reason I never let James go public with our relationship was that I never had
any intention of “coming out”. I mean really, I am a Slytherin pureblood heir, why would I throw
away everything for James Potter. No, the truth is, the truth that I attempted to hide from James
until you had to go digging for answers, I was using James.”

At Sirius’s gaping, Regulus continued, “Oh is that surprising to you? You never knew that
someone could enjoy being used, and James enjoyed it so much. Wake up Sirius, I never loved
James, he was an experiment for me. I needed to see if I was gay and so I picked the first person I
could think of, your best friend. Sure it did supply me with some pleasure to know that it would kill
you if you found out, but for the most part, I enjoyed my time with James. But I certainly didn't fall
in love with someone as disconnected as James Potter. It's simple really, when I grew bored of my
time with James, when the experiment was over, I dumped him. I dumped him because I never
loved him and he had fallen too hard for me. As I told him, he really should've known better than
 to put his faith in a Black.”

Sirius was frozen, trying to process everything that Regulus had said. An experiment, he used
James to see if he was gay and then kept him around because he enjoyed torturing Sirius, then he
grew bored and dumped him. Simple is what Regulus called it, that seemed anything but simple to
Sirius. It was a cruel and selfish decision that made him want to sock his brother right in the jaw.
James didn't deserve this, hell Sirius didn't deserve this.

His voice didn't sound like his own as he finally put his thoughts together, “This isn't you, Regulus.
You are not the type of person to treat people this way. I–”

Regulus cut in gruffly, “You don't know me, Sirius. You haven't known the type of person I am
since I was ten. I am not you, I am not Walpurga, and I am certainly not the little brother you had
as a child. Stop trying to fix this, it's useless. Just go back to your real family and leave me the fuck
alone.”

Regulus stormed out of the bathroom, and Sirius just watched because maybe Regulus was right.
Regulus behaved like someone he had never met. Sirius couldn't even begin to see his sweet little
brother in the person that just inhabited the bathroom with him. Regulus had treated James like shit
all because he hated Sirius. That boy was sick, he was beyond the help of Sirius. Regulus was
right, it was time for Sirius to leave well enough alone. If the boy he grew up with wanted to be left
alone, then alone he would be.

Chapter End Notes

Okay, that was a very emotional chapter I know. I just want to remind everyone to
check out the tags if they start to get worried after this chapter. Also, I want to remind
everyone that when Rowle was threatening Regulus, though a majority of it was about
James, he also mentioned other people in his threat. Please do not bash any character
for the decisions they made in this chapter, as they were just doing the best they could,
whether it was the right choice or not. Feel free to bash Rowle as much as you want,
because he's the worst.

Thanks for reading!!

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