questions that aren’t related to the flood research.
The old timer does this by telling brief snippets of
Based on “Paving the Past: The Los Angeles River
as Flood Control Device” by Dr. William Deverell
The Committee of Menaced and Flooded Areas
headed by J.W. Reagan has commissioned a corps
of engineers to solve the problem of the recurrent
flooding of the Los Angeles River. This process
begins with research into the history of the flooding:
“If the year of maximum floods can be identified, it
is possible from the information which exists from
other floods to arrive through a synthetic process
at a rational approximate of maximum discharge
quantities.”
The engineers turned to age, seeking out the oldest
residents of Los Angeles to interview regarding the
history of the LA basin. They needed learn what
rivers flowed where and when and with how much
force. They needed to create a hierarchy of floods.
Young engineers were dispatched to interview the
oldest people they could find. The engineers will
ask questions of these old pioneers, trying to pin
down hard geographic facts. The old timers will
answer these questions through their own lens of
history, of social relations, of personal histories.
In this game, the players take on the roles of young
engineers and the old folks they interview. The
game turns the generousity of yes and style play on
it’s head, with the interviewer carefully ignoring the
hooks and offerings of the interviewee.
The old timers will tell the young engineers what
they need to know, but they will litter the informa-
tion with tiny hints of fascinating potential. “Why
yes I guess I do remember the river running down
near Alameda because it was down thereabouts that
I saw a bald grizzly bear. Big one too. Never did
catch that old parson’s hat, neither.” The old timers
want to lure the engineers off the subject with such
amazing hooks that the engineer can’t resist inquir-
ing further.
That’s where we find the play of this game. The old
timer wants to lure the young engineer into asking
incomplete stories that leave cliffhangers: Unex-
plained and intriguing events, jokes without the
delivery of a punchline, a hook without resolution.
The young engineer needs to resist the rich story-
telling gifts that the old timer lays before them, or
alternately the young engineer needs to catch out
the old timer by finally asking for more when the
old timer has offered a story so impossible that the
engineer thinks the old timer can’t finish it.
Play Structure for Two Players:
One player takes the role of the young engineer, the
other the role of the old-timer. The engineer needs
note paper, pencil, and (optionally) a printout of the
of some sort of prop map. The map is just for the
sake of having a thing to point at, it doesn’t need to
be read or referred to in any way - any “map like”
thing will do, including a bunch of maplike scrib-
bles or simple blank piece of paper.
Play begins with the engineer announcing the in-
tent of the interview:
“If the year of maximum floods can be identified, it
is possible from the information which exists from
other floods to arrive through a synthetic process
at a rational approximate of maximum discharge
quantities. You are one of our city’s oldest residents
and I am here to interview you for the purpose of this
historical survey.”
The engineer then asks questions which the old
timer will answer, as described above. Play contin-
ues for five minutes or until the engineer leaves the
table, whichever comes first.
Play Structure for Multiple Players
Divide the players into young engineers and old
timers. If there is an odd number of players then
the extra person becomes an old timer who pairs
up with another old timer, they will be interviewed
simultaneously. The young engineers pair off with
old timers and read the opening line of the inter-
view.
 Every five minutes players switch partners until each
engineer has interviewed each old timer. If a young
engineer storms off due to a great story by an old
timer, they will return for the next interview.
After the interviews the engineers have three min-
utes in which to convene and compare their notes
with the intent of creating one master map for the
purpose of a presentation to The Committee of Men-
aced and Flooded Areas. While the engineers are
working on the presentation the old timers will ar-
range themselves as an audience, taking on the roles
of the Committee members. Immediately at the end
of the three minute preparation period the commit-
tee will begin demanding the presentation begin.
The presentation is allowed four minutes. The young
engineers will present their findings as thoroughly as
possible. Be sure each engineer gets a turn to speak!
If the young engineers get off track or refer to unre-
lated information from the personal histories of the
interview subjects the committee will say things like
“Harumph!” and “Balderdash!” and “What are we
paying you for!”
ADVICE FOR THE OLD TIMER:
You are trying to lure the engineer into asking you fol-
low-up questions about your colorful stories. Unbidden
rambling is against the rules!
Don’t finish your stories! Make a fascinating beginning
and end it immediately thereafter. One or two teasing
sentences are enough, if the engineer doesn’t bite then
move on.
Try saying “Yep, that reminds me of the [x] and the [y]
which did [z], right there in the river!”
Try saying “Have you ever been…”
Try saying “I guess I do remember that pretty well
because I saw a [x] there, and you’d never believe how it
[y]’d the [z]”
Old timer, you are going to be machine gunning out as
many interesting hooks as possible. Don’t get too at-
tached to any particular story, fire them at the engineer
and move on.
Don’t waste time, avoid long pauses or unbidden ram-
bles. Avoid simulating senility.
Game Notes (ver1.03):
The setting for this game is true, down to the name
of the committee and the title of the report. It was
inspired by a presentation by Dr. William Deverell,
titled “Paving the Past: The Los Angeles River Basin
as Flood Control Device” and who kindly gave per-
mission for me to so directly build on his hard work.
HANDOUT FOR THE ENGINEER:
“If the year of maximum floods can be identified, it
is possible from the information which exists from
other floods to arrive through a synthetic process
at a rational approximate of maximum discharge
quantities. You are one of our city’s oldest residents
and I am here to interview you for the purpose of this
historical survey.”
Sample questions for the engineer:
“What do you remember of that flood of 1825 [or
‘42, or ‘65]?”
“What did you see float in the flood waters?”
“What is the biggest thing you saw moved by the
flood?”
“What rivers did you know in your youth that are
gone now? Did any of our contemporary rivers
move from their original bed?”
“Where did the floods fill? Can you tell me about
temporary lakes that were created?”
“What landmarks do you use to remember these
locations?”
Your objective is to ignore the old timer’s stories up
until the point that they offer a story so ridiculous
that you don’t think they can complete it in any
sensible way. If you can resist asking any follow
up questions of the old timer, you win a Pyrrhic
victory. If you ask a follow up question and the old
timer tells you an amazing story, you both win. If
you ask a follow up question and the old timer fails
to please you, then you win while sort of losing
at the same time. However, if the old timer com-
pletes a story renders you unable to proceed with
the game because of surprise or laughter, then you
BOTH win a major victory. You acknowledge utter
and complete delight with the old timer’s story by
tearing up your survey map and storming out of the
room shouting “I can’t take this anymore! I’m an
engineer, dammit!”

Two (or more) Earth-Martian archivists are examin-
ing the recently discovered survey maps of Manuel
Peabody, a famous early Mars explorer of two hun-
dred years past. This is a fantastic opportunity to
learn the mysterious fate of the lost hero. Peabody
traveled with a native Martian guide through the
vastness of the Martian Cydonia region, naming
features and taking notes. Peabody would ask “his
Martian” the name of a feature, then transliterate
the long words onto the map. The archivists quickly
realize that Peabody didn’t speak Martian, and that
the Martian wasn’t sharing the names of the land
features but speaking directly to Peabody about their
journey. A mystery is afoot!
Making the Map one minute
The archivists will draw a quick, random map of
squiggles, shapes, and geoglyphs. They are allowed
one minute to do this. Do not be overcareful with
the map, it doesn’t need to actually represent any-
thing but the idea of “map.”
Translation Phase five minutes
Play consists of the archivists taking turns tracing the
path of Peabody from feature to feature on the map.
The named features are created on the fly. Naming a
feature consists of an archivist drawing a circle and
saying “Here is what we call the [x] which con-
sists of [description of feature], however Peabody’s
transcription of the Martian name reads [what the
Martian said to Peabody when asked to name the
feature]. Example: “Here is what we call the Lowen-
heim Bulge, a thousand foot high rounded mass of
iron pyrite streaked with rust. However, Peabody
wrote this down in Martian - ‘Earthman we
have walked many leagues together and my joints are
inflamed with the pain of loss.’”
in 2016. If you play any of these, give me a holler at hutchingsonian@gmail.com.
These are three quick games about personal and social histories and geographic space, started
ver 1.0
Peabody also wrote notes alongside some of the
features. Some of these notes are about day to day
occurrences, anecdotes about his interactions with
his guide or the landscape. After one archivist reads
the feature name aloud, the other archivist will read
a note that will illuminate or provide counterpoint to
the Martian’s speech. Example: “Today my Martian
produced two pieces of iron pyrite from his horn
travel box and placed them near the base of the
mound. Curious little buggers!”
After completing the translation of a feature, an ar-
chivist will draw another circle elsewhere and con-
nect it to the previous with a dotted line. This is the
path that Peabody and the Martian traveled.
Translation play continues for five minutes, or at
least five translations. At that point Peabody’s travels
end, possible mid-sentence on his part.
Speculation three minutes
One archivist will then state the situation under
which the survey maps were recovered. This may
include a brief description of Peabody’s and/or the
Martian’s remains, if they were found. Then the
archivists spend three minutes speculating as to the
meaning of the Martian’s words and what happened
on the expedition.
Optional Presentation five minutes
If an audience is available they should be gathered
and the archivists give a five minute presentation
called “On the Remarkable Nomenclature of the
Recently Recovered Survey Maps of the Lost 1999
Peabody Expedition to Greater Cydonia”. Questions
are encouraged.
 Hey human. An alien has come to your home. You suspect
that it is going to destroy everything you hold you dear, but
maybe it won’t. Maybe it will share some of its amazing
stuff with you.
Let’s talk to it.

One player is the alien, the other is the human.

The alien has no grasp of where or what any

Earthy thing is. Before play begins the alien
should form an alien concept in their mind
(which admittedly is impossible) related to the
immediate geography around the play space,
then translate that into an understandable
though incomprehensible set of actions the alien
intends to perform on that geography.

But what’s this? One of the locals has come up to chat.

Best be polite, alien. Ask them questions related to
your alien interests in your surroundings.

The alien will ask questions which the human will answer. The human will be
describing a place that is important to them, which ties into their life, which
they currently occupy. The human may only answer questions, though they
may ask clarifying questions if they questions aren’t clear.

The human lives in the actual physical space the game is being played
in, or the two players agree beforehand on what sort of sort of imaginary
setting they are playing in.
The alien doesn’t know how to lie, or that lies exist, and believes all it is
told.
The alien speaks English poorly and its questions may After five minutes the alien will decide
be unclear or simply unfathomable to the human. it has enough information to act.
The alien will not explain its questions further. It asks a The alien player will step out
question once. of character to narrate what
The alien has terms which it cannot translate. It wants tremendously efficacious and
to do a “gulyach “ here. When the human asks the alien dramatic actions the alien character
can only explain in the vaguest terms. is performing or causing to be
The human is completely helpless. They cannot fight performed to change the surrounding
or hurt the alien in any way, and area. Alternately, draft a passerby and
ask them to tell you what the alien is
doing. -

Does the human survive in the short term?

The long term?
Was the human better or worse before the alien came?