Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Adult Bullying
Adult Bullying
Pick and choose your battles. Choosing how to react depends on the number
and severity of the bullying behaviors. If the behavior is not excessive or harmful
and you only see the bully occasionally (such as at work or the annoying relative
during family gatherings), you may want to keep your distance. Because of the
amount of time, it can take to handle bullying behavior in many cases, consider
picking your battles if it is not directly harmful to you.
Make eye contact. Eye contact can be significant, as bullies have less empathy
when they cannot see your face or your eyes.
Escape if you can. Ask if you can move your desk far away from the bully or limit
your interactions with them whenever possible. If that fails, try again. Can you
switch to another position in the organization?
Document the offenses. Document every single offense and try to keep the
records for as long as possible. You may need them if you want to file a
complaint at work or, in some cases, a police report if the bully's actions become
emotionally or physically damaging.
If you want to talk with the aggressor, you have to consider these points:
Prepare for the encounter: Harmon suggests you prepare what you want to say
specifically, as well as where you want to say it. Having a plan will help relieve
some of the anxiety you might be feeling, and it can also help ensure you
approach the situation safely.
Don’t attack them: Therapist Roni Weisberg-Ross at Good Therapy
recommends you calmly and self-assuredly stand up for yourself. Avoid getting
emotional or escalating the situation. If you don’t think you’re ready, focus on not
giving them the reaction they want for now.