{pid forthe privilege i privilege is what it was). Nobody else would have “Tulip in their gang. They knew from experience that she was out of school ‘more often than in. (Tha's why never seen her) From that day on, spent countless hours scufing alone round the playground, desperatly hoping that she'd show up, or that some soft soul in on ofthe busy swarms of children whooping round me would crack and say the words Ionged to beat “Forge silly old Tulip, she’s never ere, anyway. Come and play with "ook back and think | mast have been mad. What sort of friendship ft when one of the pai is hardly ever there, and the other is never permitted 10 90 off and find her? (On this, my father was adamant. “Ti not even discussing it, Natalie. You are not going over to Talip's house, She can come here as often as she likes. But you're not going there. And that ina? ‘Why wes he ao fxm about i? What had he scen that Gt day that made ‘hm so convined the Pesces' farm was no place for ¢ daughter of hs? Most ‘up-down smallholdings are vnged with dsembowelled machinery. Most small time farmers keep frusuated dogs chained up to batk at every pasing sparrow. And we did't mect Tulips parents. For all Dad knocked and knocked, no one appeared. ‘Adazen tines a week 14 sy to hin “Lets go back and uy aga. thavett seen ber for days. probably won't see her again, ever, at tls rate, IF ean’ go and find her. “maybe she's “tedoube it, Natalie” “at mot her ful her parents don't think schot's important! ‘af wore you, 14 make some other fiends. Because nothings going to change here. You are not going tobe allowed to goto Tulip's house. And that stat ‘ae Lust being stubborn? Wht srt of mage di she have forme? all ‘know is I never made the effort to find another frend. dh even pat _myself out to steel enough good tings from the kitchens to wheedle my ‘way into oe ofthe school gangs. Instead stayed loot and during ‘evenings and weekends | floated round the Palec, presumably content with the glancing interest of bored gusts, and my own company lf te erstanding on the edge of the lawns. ‘Then my heatt leapt up, and across I'd fly. “Tulip! Where have you been? It’s been ages. What do you want to do?We dd everything We went everywhere We were called In fom lawns and potng sheds, shubberes and rece gardens. When the cold weather came, they look for us in Toanges an cofee rooms, aleoves and blanket stores Sometime it was awkward to come out because, forthe lst hou, ‘we'd een wrapped inthe fld ofthe plush ruby curtains, eavesdropping on some uniting ptr of bickering guess. But mostly we'd appear soon after we heard ths determined footsteps and the call “rime to go home now, Tul.” ‘cant tay” “Your parents wil worry” wast tue Tulip’ parents worried, they have shoven up a dozen times before, when noone had even realize she was stil with me il was ordered off to bed. But Dad would Kep a suaght face. So weuld she. “can Teeme back iomori0%? ‘yo ike ‘Maybe she weuld. Maybe she would. (d be walling, whleheve:) ‘Somerimes Dad would notice me drifting round in trance of solitude, and, realizing how busy hed ben ataly, offer to tke me fing. We'd set of ‘the quiet hoar fer hunch, and thee she be, hanging around the Feld end ofthe wa through the spinney. “You can send her home Ifyou Wk say sod. sung that she hada bothered 10 show up fr me, But held greet her as cherflly as usual, “coming along?” se was no good at shag (Dad sald that eversthicg swam of the ‘minute saw her shadow.) Het eatch one thing alter saater, doa right. and she'd get nothing But she seemed happy enough. Ane so did he, He never ssemed bored onthe afternoons Talp came, “what was that game you two were playing yetrdey, when Ms Seat ‘Henderson complained shout the noise” “Rows in a Fret? “bid you find somewhere more sensible to play she grinned. "We moved dove to the cells, and called it Hogs in Ture instea? He shook his had “vary pleasant. Though suppose Iss ess of bother than tha gamne you were playing alas week." "Which? Fat in he Fe?‘Te was Malaria’ most of last week, [reminded het. "Why can't you invent some quiet ones?” 1 don’ invent them’ tod him. “Tlipfavents the games.” He tumed towards er. ‘Soy besa ‘How about i, Tulip?” she cocked het head to one side-Thete's Roof Bones. ‘That's very quiet. And we play Days of Dumnes quit lot. No nose at all sn that one” He shuddered ‘Days of Dumbest Roa of Bones! Dont the two of you ever play anything pleasant?" ‘he was grinning again now. 1 suppose you played things like Happy Families and Tickle the Baby ‘when you were young.” "Yes, he sali, ‘That's the sort of thing we used to play back inthe good ld days. she gave him her lity look. ‘What's the worst thing you ever di, br Barnes?” ‘When twas a child” she nodded. LET asked him that question, he'd never have given a sensible answer. ‘But Tulp could make Dad tlk about anything, anything a al, and so he fell quiet thinking, "The thing I feel worst about, even afer allthis time, i dropping my standfather’s tortoise on the garden pat,’he tld us finaly.“ didn't have the guts to go and tl, so Ist shoved it out of sight under the nearest, bush. He still ooked uneasy, remembering ‘How old were you? I asked. “Fight! He made a quick ealulation Twenty-seven years ago!” ‘Did itsmas” Tulip demanded. ‘The word she chose repelled him, you could tel. He picked a diferent one with cate, “Us shell dd nae, yes! ‘Was tan accident? “oF couse ic was an accident, he said shatply."You don't suppose 1 dew “Noy she said hasty. ‘There was asilenc. Then Tulip sa: "You should have put itn the freezer to Kill it? Dad’ face was plete, “Tsthe kindest way, for sh and tetapins,’ she assured hin “Probably for tortoises as well.” He'd forgotten his ching line. He was string at her now!“Tulip, how would you ever know that?" “L suppose I just heard it somewhere, And remembered it.” Dad turned to me, ‘Did you know?" I wanted so much to say I did. But Tulip would have known Iwas fAibbing. "No," I said sullenly. He turned back to her. ‘And do the things you hear worry you?" ‘No,’ she said, ‘Sometimes I think about them for a bit. But mostly Tm interested more than Pm worried.” ‘There was a furry underneath her float. “Is that a bite?" he asked, happy to be distracted. ‘Have you been lucky for once? Is that a bite?” ‘No,’ she said, not even looking, ‘No, its now”