Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Exp 20413
Exp 20413
insuated Methamphetamine
powder / crystals
Erowid Experience ID: 20413Wish Things Could Be as Simple as they Were on Meth I
by abnormallydizzy
the worlds problems, but I could still operate my body and my thoughts on a logical level. And they were so much better than average! About an hour into my soliloquoy, I paused enough to wonder if I was boring my friend A. He said no, that while he didnt get the talking side eect, he enjoyed it greatly when others did, especially since he felt he could concentrate on multiple things at once. His homework consisted of coding in C++, which involves manipulating basic rules. That might explain why he could concentrate on that and on me at the same time (the rules were already in his head, he wasnt really learning anything new per se. He just felt like he could manipulate them better). He later told me whatever it was that I was talking to him about somehow merged in his mind with his coding, and at the time he believed he was on the verge of coming up with a new way of programming (later to be absolutely not true :-), again, duh ). Some hours later, he began to get really tired, so he left and went back to his apartment. I thanked him profusely, but was nowhere near the end of my experience. But without an ear to talk o, I was a bit lost on what to do. So I started to clean. I was subletting an apartment for the summer, and was too jittery to try and do homework as A had done. The owners of the place were obviously not of the Cleanliness is next to Godliness mentality, so I had my work cut out for me. I did the normal things, and then got down to the nitty gritty, scrubbing every inch of the inside of the fridge and oven. It made me unbelievably fucking proud. Today the kitchen, tomorrow the cataloging of my socks! We had started the experience at around six p.m. Saturday evening, and when I next looked at a clock it was eight oclock Sunday morning. A gave me a call around then and we walked to Friendlys for breakfast (about a mile for me, half mile for him). By then I was starting to come down, which was mostly not unpleasant, but even with the little I had taken I wanted to hold onto that sense of accomplishment and love for myself forever. He told me my pupils were still dialated, and I was talking in a speedy manner. The idea of food didnt make me nauseated, but it didnt hold any particular interest for me either. I got some coee and a bagel, and made myself eat it (hadnt eaten in 16+ hours). The coee didnt do much but make my heart race, so I quickly switched to water. Adam was continually amused by my chatter and attitude (and the chain smoking). The rest of the day I grew more and more physically tired, but my mind was still going at a million miles a minute. I didnt want to go to sleep because I didnt want to miss a minute of the high. The reection of myself in the mirror captivated me. For the rst time in longer than I can remember I thought I was pretty. My boyfriend at the time came back from a weekend away (he didnt necessarily approve of my drug usage, was worried because of my addictive personality (nicotine and alcohol, amongst non-drug related personality traits)), we chatted for a while before falling asleep in each others arms. That was about ten p.m. Sunday night. I realize this is a little long, sorry about that, but I want to give the full experience. When I woke up, all I could think about was how I wanted to do it again. As a matter of fact, I never wanted to not be doing it. While the majority of my drug related experiences (except for alcohol, which is an entirely dierent long story) have been positive, and in some cases mind expanding, nothing had ever or has ever reached me on such a profound level. It was simpler than the hallucinations of acid or shrooms, less thought-muddying than alcohol or
Exp Year: 2000 Added to Database: Nov 13, 2005 Gender of reportee: female
A Generated by exp pdf.pl v.1.34 using perl & pdfLTEX on Sun Aug 21 21:16:04 2011 GMT.
Erowid Experience ID: 20413Wish Things Could Be as Simple as they Were on Meth I
by abnormallydizzy
pot, and more honest somehow than E, and it clung to me, released me, elevated me. So I decided never to do it again. I know that I could easily come to depend on it, revolve my life around the high. And what would happen as my tolerance increased? I wish I could tell you that I used the memory of adoring myself, worshipping the wonderfullness that is me, and kept it as a measure of how I could feel when completely sober, I didnt. If only life were a movie. And an after-school special at that. But now, even almost three years later, thinking of it makes me want to do it again. I dont think Im better than anyone for not, then or now. I guess my whole point is that I wish things could be as simple as they were on meth.
Exp Year: 2000 Added to Database: Nov 13, 2005 Gender of reportee: female
A Generated by exp pdf.pl v.1.34 using perl & pdfLTEX on Sun Aug 21 21:16:04 2011 GMT.