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C A ROLI N E O F B RU N SWI C K, QU E EN O F E N G LAN D.

T HE Q U E E N C AN DO
NO W RO N G
B E I N G S O ME PAS SAG ES AN D P E R S O NA L
O P I N I O N S I N T H E EAR L Y L I F E
O F JI MMY RA B B I T

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WI T H A F R O N T I SP I EC E

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WI N D U S
1903
 CO N T E N T S

BO O K I . ( 1796— 13 06 )

WHEN GEO RGE fi

T P E T HI RD WAS KI N G
c mm n

l. L IT T LE WHI T E R ABBIT
I I . T HE S E L EC T CO FF EE HO US E

II I. I AH RESC UE! )ASC O F RO M P

MY LA DY KI N D AN D BO UNT I F U L
V. T HE P R I N CESS O F WAL ES

V I. WI N SOME L EE
V " . T HE L I FE FO R ME
V I ". TRA F ALGAR D AY S
I X. T H E D E L I C ATE I N V E ST I G AT I O N

BOO K 11. ( 18 14 )

UN D ER T HE R EGEN C Y

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L En v m
T HE QU E E N C AN DO N O WRO N G

C H APTER I
LIT TLE WH ITE RABBIT

I T was in the su m
m
er of 17 95 that I was kidn apped by

D r. Pasco, that arch vill ain who wrou

- ght more sorrow in his
life than shoul d suf
fi ce to hang a doz en men , an d never hu n g

him . I was then a child in my fourth year, an d heir to a toler

able estate in Ireland the which was the cause ofmy undoing.
,

Not till lon g after d id I learn this but the circum stances
,

attending my abdu ction an d captivity were so engraven on

m y memo ry th at, tho ugh I should live a h undred yea rs, I

shall never f orget them .

It happen ed in this wise . I was pl ayin g in the orchard ,

which was quite close to our man sion when Pasco poked his
,

face over the gate .

ou r n ame b e my little l ord I he as k ed in
”
,

a whispering tone .
m
I looked up an d saw a smartly -d ressed an ofabout fi ve
,

an d -thirty smil ing at me in a wa i n tended to be f iendly

m
r .
y
Y oumight almo st have mi stook hi f or a gentlem an in his

claret-coloured coat three -cornered hat carried at a smart

,

cock an d his pigtail powdered an d done u so fi n e with a

, p
bow. And indeed he had served as a su rgeon in the f orces
m
, , ,

an d knew the ways ofgentl ef olk without being one hi self

m
,

except to ape the anner.

4 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRO N G
What might your name be he repeated beckoning e ,
m
toward s him an d scrutiniz ing me shrewdly with his cl ose -set
, ,

foxy brown eyes yet not relaxing his smile.

-

m
,

I told hi ’
B essy, which was what they called me at
home an d short for Desmond
,

B essy said he ; why then f or su re you are the very

’

m
, , , ,

yo ung gentlem an I a seeking for to show you this pretty

thing an d fumbling in his capacious big flapped pocket , ,

d rew out a little white rabbit an d dangled it by its ears j ust

m
,

ou t of y reach .
Give it to me I cried in ecstasy an d held out my hands. ,

Not this one said he an d af

,
’
fected to pet an d fondle it
,

against his cru el square chin . This is mine. But there are ‘

seven others in a n estie close b —

y j u st a fi el d or two off— nd

m
a

y ou ay h ave y o ur pick of them . Seven others with pink

eyes except one which has a black ear an d that s very

, , ,
’

e m ark able . I shou ld pick that one ifI were you . There s ’
r

no other boy in Ireland what s got a little whi te rabbit with

’

one black ear. Only you m ust come very q uiet or m ayhap ,

yo u ll scare them .
’ ’

I ll askmy mother ifI ay go said I .

’
m ,
’

T was the good lad y hersel f what sent me here he

’
,

declared sliding the rabbit back into his pocket so there s

, ,
’

no occas ion for youto ask. Besides we ve no time to lose or ,

’
,

the b unnies will run away. See I ll help you over the gate . ,
’ ’

H e stretched his hands over an d down with a coaxing way , ,

an d had me by his side in a twinkling . Now run quick an d ,

q uiet— very q uiet an d with that caught me by the hand ,

an d set of fdown the road at a good ro und pace

By the time we had gotten p ast the bend I was out of
breath an d run of fm y legs whereupon he whipped me up in
,

his arm s an d carried me al ong with constant glances over his

,

shou lder to see if he were followed . The rude an d rapid

motion ofhis gait (for he was stout built an d no m aster of ,

agility ) j olted ou t ofme what little wind I had l eflz an d I ,

was mightily relieved when he su ddenl y came to a hal t.

 LIT TLE WHITE R AB BIT 5

Hell s truth ! what have we here he m uttered .

’ ’

I screwed my head ro und an d there coming down the , ,

highway was a company ofsoldiers with an of

,
fi cer at their ,

head an d pri soners in theii midst. '

In a flas h Pasco scrambled over a stone wall on our right ,

an d ru n n ing along a few paces with his head bent low an d ,

me cl utched to his belly selected a tall part ofit an d fl ung

,

him se lfdown on the grass.

Now I had a mortal terror ofsoldiers that were at thi s
, ,

time q uartering the country as a postilion does a b ad road

an d althou gh Lord Lake had not yet dragooned the Rebellion
(wh ich w a s scarce di s
g ui sed u
) p an d do wn the l and I knew ,

enough of redcoats from the tales my nurse told me to

, ,

associ ate them with bl ood y men an d cru el deed s. Pasco s ’

proclaimed fear ofmeeting them ad ded to my terrors an d I

m
,

asked hi in a scared whi sper Woul d the soldiers shoot ,

me
I saw the expression ofhis face change an d a grim warning ,

smile creep over it.

They re coming for you he whi spered an d I ve j ust

’

,
’
,
’

saved yo u in time . Don t yo u so m uch as say a prayer in a

’

,
’
—
whisper or they ll hear you an d kill yo u dead dead—d ead . ’

At this I began to whimper where upon he l ugged the l ittle

,

white rabbit out ofhis pocket again an d held it kicking an d , ,

stru ggling against my face as we crouched on the ground.

,

Y oukeep a-ki ssing it so f —

t an d low soft an d low whil st
, ,

the soldiers pass said he ; show what a brave boy yo u are

, ,

an d don t c1y. H u sh h h
’
.

It d i stracted my attention at once an d I nestled my face ,

d own against the little sof t furry thing an d began to ki ss

m
, ,

it until the tramp ofapproaching f eet with fi r an d regular ,

tread awakened my fears again an d I glanced up timo rously

, ,

us -h
H h h he repeated , an d I felt his big strong hand
-

steal round m y neck an d grip it, an d press m y face down

g inst the grass as I
a a l ay there .
6 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Throu g h a sm all chink in the bottom ofthe wal l I cau ght
sight ofthe soldiers swin i n g pas t convoying several prisoners
g , ,

pinioned an d with the ropes attached to one another.

,

Following them came a flockof women crying an d m aking

m m
,

la entation s m any with babies in their ar s an d calling to

, ,

the prisoners. I vow it was a very mov ing spectacle to see

the prisoners faces haggard an d hopeless an d their wives
’
, ,

di straught . There m ust have been a h undred soldiers in

charge of them who swung along talking an d l aughing
,

amongst them selves an d thei r acco u trements rattling with a

,

m artial sound .
It seemed an hour an d yet could not have been more than
,

a f ew min u tes be fore the footsteps faded into d i stance an d

, ,

Pasco loosed his grip ofme pocketed the little white rabbit
, ,

an d d rawing ou
, t a handkerchief wiped the big bead s of ,

sweat of fhis brow .

Then he turned to me an d asked me
Do you kno w w hat beheading is P ’

m
It being within y comprehension I nodded my head . ,

And drawing an d q uartering P ’

Ofthis I con f essed m y ign oran ce .

I t s taking a sword an d ripping ofyo u open he expl ained
’ ’
, ,

an d c u tting you in four pieces an d your head makes flve. ’

,

H e ill ustrated the p rocess by a ro u gh diagram on my own

person an d I can remember the harsh scrape of his long
,

thum bn ail as he drew it across the cloth his florid face

-
,

grown very red an d bloodthirs ty .

Those sofi iers he went ou are after your father an d
,
’

your mother an d you for to behead you al l three an d to ,

draw an d quarter yo u because you ve been re b els an d traitors ’

to H is Majesty the King. ’

At thi s I was greatly al armed an d began to cry. ,

H uh h-h he warned me or they ll hear you an d come

s -
,
’

back . ”

I stifled my sobs an d asked what they would do to me .

,

Behead draw an d quarter you he repeated . Then,

, ,
 LITT LE WHITE RABBIT 7

perceiving by my coun tenance this conveyed no exact picture

to m y mind he e vidently cas t about for some way to drive it
,

home . And so Why I ll j ust show yo u what they ll do to

, ,
’ ’

yo u ; for tis kindest that yo u should know .

’ ’

With that he produced a big kni fe with a lon g keen blad e ,

which he opened ; an d then brought out the little white rabbit

from his pocket an d telling me to look began deliberately
, , ,

to hack its head of f .

I vow I could not have been more horrifi ed had he turned

his kni f e on me. At the fi rst sight ofthe bl ood spouting out
an d staining the white f ur I felt nigh to swoon an d shrank , ,

away from the bru tal spectacle holding my hands to my

m
,

—
eyes an d imploring hi to Stop s top stop —
m
,
‘
Nay n ay said the villain an d tore my hands fro m y
’

m
, , ,

eyes ; yo u must see an d take heed . I a sho wing yo u what

the soldiers will do to you. They ll cu t yo ur head of fan d ’

—
y o ur carcass in four like th1s an d he proceeded to chop the
,

rabbit s body into four pieces the b l ood g u shing ou t over

’
,

his fi n gers. Then he skewered one ofthe b l oody f ragments

on the point ofhis bl ade an d poked it almost into my face. ,

That s what the soldiers will d o to yo u he declared . How

’
,
’

—
will you like to be treated so cruelly eh boy i ”
,

The illustration brought the full horror of behead ing an d

q uarterin g before me vividly an d I had but one thought—to ,

fly that abominable fi eld .

I will go back to my mother I cried an d j umped to my ’

m
, ,

f eet ; but instantly his hand flun g out an d clutched my ar ,

an d drew me down again leaving a smear of b l ood u ,pon my

sleeve .

Never back home said the sco undrel in a scared whi sper
,
’
,

of al armed su rp ri se ; that is where the soldiers are n ow.

They are looking for you for to behead d raw an d quarteryo u
m
, , , ,

so e as I have done the little whi te rabbit. Didn t yo u see ?

’

L oo khere - he pointed his b loody blad e at m y throat an d ,

gave me a p rick with it that s how they ll begin . And ’ ’

then
8 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRO N G
H e fi n ishedwith a flourish of the weapon as though he
m
,

were going to pl unge it into e which completed my ,

paralysis offright .
Don t I cried shrinking back an d trembling violently
’ ’
, ,

don t let the sold iers catch me an d I turned my head

’

towards the d irection they had departed in with a throb of

su spen se .

Then be you an obed ient boy said he an d wiped his hand s ’

m
, ,

an d kni f e on the grass an d I ll hide yo u fro them an d ‘

, ,

take you away so as they shan t fi n d you . ’ ’

Bu
’
t I w ant to go to my mother I told him . ,

Youve no mother n ow said the villain solemnly ; she s

’
,
’ ’

been killed for sure by thi s time. An d so has your father.

And the soldiers are in the n ursery looking for you . ’

And my nurse P ’

Why they shot her Did n t yo u hear the gun I

, .
’ ”

I thought he spoke the truth for I was sick with terror , ,

an d had no cap acity left to consider ofthings. The soldiers

had passed down towards ou r house an d Pasco had told me ,

what the soldiers would do an d there were the dismembered

,

an d bleeding rem ain s ofthe little white rabbit in f ront of

my eyes to invest what was said with a sense oflively reality.

I was but a child still in the n ursery an d un able to oppose
, ,

an y degree of consideration to thi s villain s decl arations

’

except to believe them .

I have no doubt he saw the mental condition to which
he had reduced me for be adapted his cunning tone
m
,

aga .
I fI help to save you will yo u promise to be a good boy
,

an d obedient
’
Y es, yes.
Then take heed to this. Y ou m ust never say what your
name is or youll be found out an d then there 11 be no
,
’
,
’

saving ofyou . I fanyone asks you who you are you m ust ,

an swer He hesitated for a moment casting abo u t for ,

a su itable name an d then his eye catchin g sight of the

, ,
 LIT TLE WH ITE R ABBIT 9

f
ragments at his f
eet,
very name he excl aimed . T he
Y ou m u or su
f
”
st sa y o u are Jimm y R abbit . Mind re
y ,

that s your nam e —J immy Rabbit Jimmy Rabbit Jimmy

’
, ,

R abbit . Learn it hard an d f ast . T will remind yo u of the

ri sq ue yo u run . ’

m
Ji my Babbit I repeated . ,
’

That s right. Jimmy R abbit . See an d don t forget it.

’ ’

And always bear in mind that I your true an d kind friend ’

m
m
,

an d the only an that can save y ou from the cru el soldiers.

m
And now co e you along with me an d don t make an y ,
’

noi se an d we ll run away an d be safe an d no one can catch

,
’
,

us ifwe go at once . ’

He rose to his f eet an d after reconnoitring the road over

,

the wall led me into it an d hurrying along we present] y

, , , ,

reached a side l ane u p which he tu

,
rned .

A little f urther we came across a chai se with a pony tied

to a tree an d very contentedly m unching the leaves. At
the back of the chaise a big chest was l ashed which Pasco ,

opened an d li fting me up laid me on some straw with which

, , ,

the bottom was lined .

This was a proceeding I d id not reli sh an d consequently .
,

began to bellow an d scream to be let out.

Y ou yo u ng hell s cub he cried an grily do you want
’
,

the soldiers to catch you an d behead an d quarter you ,

And thrust me back again glaring down at me so savagely ,

that I quaked with fear an d ceased resistin g. For there ,

was something in the m an s sq u are heavy f ace when the

’
,

colour fl ushed into it an d the glitter of his evil eyes giving

, ,

them a diabolic look which not only on that day but for
m
, ,

any years af terwards fi l l ed me with f ear an d foreboding.

m
,

Don t you know I a taking you away from the cruel

’

soldiers what 1 1 treat yo u same as I did the l ittle white

’
,

rabbit ? Lie still or I ll call em . ’ ’ ’

H e shut the lid b ut a moment later opened it again an d

, ,

asked
’
What s yo ur name P ’
10 TH E Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRO NG
Des I began an d then remembering chan ged it into
, , ,

Jimmy Rabbit . ’

Have a care said he threateningly an d closed the lid

,
’

with a bang an d a min ute afterwards the chaise was joltin g

,

down the lane .

As we tu rn ed into the highway he p u lled up an d thump , ,

ing on the top ofthe chest called to me ,

Jimmy Rabbit how are you P ,

’

I told him truthfully enough V ery squeez ed .

, ,
’

Never mind that he called back so long as you are safe

,
’
,

from the soldiers an d drove ou.

,
’

The chaise swayed an d jerked an d lurched casting me ,

from side to side ofthe chest with many a grievous knock ,

until I wedged m y f eet an d arms against the top an d bottom ,

an d sec u red a pu rch ase . I think Pas co mu st have been a

little anxious about me for presently he pul led up again

, ,

an d coming rou
, nd to the back of the chaise opened the ,

chest .
He gave me a keen gl ance an d then inf ormed me there were
,

some more soldiers coming down the road only a good ,

distance of f yet ; b ut he thought he would warn me so that ,

I might lie particularly stil l an d al l the time he was speak

ing was fi n gerin g some holes bored with an auger in the side
ofthe chest . And having evidently satisfied him se lf I was

al l right shu
, t me up again an d mounting to the dickey, , ,

whipped on the horse .

Stil l a little later an d he pulled up once more an d I heard
, ,

him in apparent conversation .

Seen a boy cal led Desmond an d kno wn as B essy for
m
, ,

short ? Well perhaps I have . But what ay you wan t

,

with him ? Y oudon t m ean to tell me that A rebel s son

’ ’

is he ? Well I never ! The little viper to be born ofsuch

, ,

a f ather ! Serve him right to be behead ed drawn an d

m
, ,

q uartered ! Youll fi n d hi down the road pl ayin g with a

’

’
little white rabbit .
In the uf m m
fled recesses of y chest the only voice I co u ld
 12 THE QUEE N CAN DO NO WRONG
We drove on al l through the af ternoon the horse getting ,

slower an d slower u ntil we reached a village about seven

,

o clock where Pasco decided to put up for the night.

’
,

Now remember he warned me as we approached a small

, ,
’
,

inn y our father is dead an d yo ur mother is dead an d your

m
, , ,

n ame is Jimmy Rabbit an d I a your guardi an D r. Pas co , , ,

who is taking youto be schooled . ’

Y es I said I remember.
’ ’
, ,

He pul led up at the inn an d ord ered the horse to be ,

groomed an d baited an d then procured some bread an d milk

, ,

an d sat an d watched me eat it . When I had fi n ished he

‘

took me up to a bed room an d locked me in whilst he went , ,

down to re f resh him sel f

m
.

Lef t alone al l sorts ofhorrible i d eas came into my ind as

,

I recalled the startli n g adventures ofthe day. I could hard ly

reali z e y de m
sperate situ ation fo r the t raged y was too great ,

fo r my childi sh mind to embrace . But I was fully persuad ed

the soldiers were after me an d the fear thi s occasioned drove ,

the thoughts ofmy parents out of my head . I was to be

beheaded drawn an d quartered if I was caught. And
, ,

I remembered the little white rabbit an d Pasco s long ,

’

keen knife an d the blood Spurting out an d pictured the

, ,

scene again an d again to my mind u ntil I felt inclined to

scream alou d in my solitude an d terror. In short I worked
m
,

myselfup to such a pitch there alone in the strange roo ,

an d the f ading twilight that when p resently there floated u

, p
the so und ofloud voices from below I crawled under the bed ,

an d h id my sel f q u aking . ,

I suppose I m ust have fallen asleep for I was aroused by ,

Pasco hauling me by my legs dn to the floo r in the middle of

the room . H e was dru nk an d I did n ot know what was the ,

matter with him an d being surprised to see him reeling

,

abo u t asked him ifhe were ill .

,

Fo r an answer he gave me a shrewd cufl on the side ofmy

'

head an d ordered me into b

, ed di recting me to tu rn in next ,

to the wal l an d not move until the morning. Then he laid

 LIT TLE WHITE RAB BIT 13

him sel f beside me an d was soon snoring having pre viously , ,

lock ed the doo r an d put the key in his pocket.

There was not uch sleep for me as I crouched an d m
shivered with apprehen sion in the little space he lef t me for ,

he kept me trembling with his tossings an d turnings an d

m
,

constantly a heavy ar was thrown over so that it often

times fell across my face. At las t thoroughly exhausted I
m
, ,

anaged to wriggle down to the f oot ofthe bed an d fell into ,

a deep sl u mber .

I was awakened in the early morning by Pasco shaking me

rou ghly an d sal uting me with the q uestion
What s your name ’

B essy I answered witho ut reflectin g an d indeed scarce

’
, , , , ,

knew where I was or who was q uestioning me.

Whereupon he caught e a slap across the cheek that set m
me shrieking.
Damn y ou be q uiet he hi ssed an d catching me by the
m
, ,

throat nearly choked me ; an d yet could not stop y outcry

m
, ,

which burst fro me every time he slackened his grip . At

l as t he d rew his kni fe an d o pened it with a great parade an d ,

stood over me .

Boy said he I ,
’
going for to behead d raw an d q uarter
,
’
m , ,

y o u thi s very min u te un l ess

you s top c rying an d with th at
rolled u hi sleeve ve ry b u -
siness like .
p
m
s s

I saw the knife flourishin g before y eyes an d I tell you ,

the sight ofit struck me d u mb .

Now said he slowly an d deliberate ly bending over e
,
’
, , m ,

with one hand gripping my throat an d the other describing

slow circl es in the air thi s kni fe is for a boy called Des
m
,

ond what s been ordered for killing by His Majesty King

,
” ’

Ge orge the Thi rd . I fso be your name is Desmond

No no I cried al l in a terror an d my wits awakened
’

m
, , , , ,
’
I Jimmy Rabbit an d I held out my hands in supplica
tion for there lurked in his eyes a most d iabolic expression .
,

Ah said he ceasing his circl es in the air but still

m
m
, , ,

keepi ng the kni fe aloft that s better. J1 y Rabbit eh ? ,

’

,
14 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
Well I ve no call to hurt an y boy called Jimmy Rabbit
’

m
,

but ifever yousay your na e s otherwise —why it s of f with

’
,
’

your head an d your carcass in four quarters an d little white

, ,

rabbit with ou R membe th t J imm y Rabbit an d never

m
y . e r a , ,

breathe that name again you mentioned ( b y accident I a ,

sure ) j u
’
st now . For it do mean death to you .
I promised him sol emnl y I would not with every intention ,

an d sin cerity to keep my word for he was still bending over ,

me an d occasionally m aking awful motions with his knife .

,

At l ast when (as I take it) he conceived I was suf

,
ficien tl y
impressed he allowed me to ri se from the b
, ed an d with ,

a th u mp on the back ordered me to dress.

H is devilish design fo r to fi x terror into my inf ant mind
had done its work . In his attitu de towards me I recognised
the bu tcher ofthe helpless l ittle white rabbit on the yester
day an d felt the full conviction he was capabl e oftreating me
,

in the same way.

All that d ay we drove along in the chaise an d I think it ,

m ust have b een some score oftimes that he turned round

suddenly an d asked me Who are youP But I an swered ’

m m
,

him each time Jim y Rabbit never once m aking a is

, ,
’

take an d was perfect with my lesson My father is dead

, , ,

an d my mother is dead an d my gu

m
ardian Dr. Pasco is
m
, , ,

taking e to be schooled . Which seemed to af ’

ford hi

Once I summoned courage an d asked him what a guardian

was an d he said it meant the same as u
, ncle . I did not relish
thi s an d felt loth to accept the new rel ationship thus thrust
,

upon me ; b ut Pasco had a wayofpersuading me to anything

instantly by tapping the pocket in which he carried his kni fe ,

an d nod ding his head knowingly ; an d that was an argu ment

there was no resisting .
Late in the afl ern oon we reached a city which I have since
learnt was Dublin . Leavin g the pony an d chaise in some
stables where Pasco had a great dis u te with the ownerab o ut
, p
overdriving the horse an d was compelled to pay him a couple
,
 L I I TLE
' ‘
WHITE RABBIT 15

of guineas extra by way ofcompensation we went to some

, ,

lodgings in a squal id back street. Here we stayed that night ,

an d early the next morning embarked on board a hoy an d ,

crossed to England ; an d the following morning arrived at

port an d took coach for London .
Pasco booked seats inside an d kept a diligent watch over
,

me who was wedged between him selfan d the corner ofthe

,

coach with his elbow d ug into me as a warning every time

, , ,

I was addressed by an y other passengers. Thi s happened

several tim es two women especially being ve ry kind in their
,

manner an d one ofthem gave me an orange the fi rst I ever

, ,

ate in my lif e . B ut for speaking I had nothin g I durst to

sa
y except
, th a t My father is dead an d my mothe r is de ad
, ,

an d my name is Jimm y Rabbit an d my gu ardian D r . Pasco

, , ,

is takin g me to be schooled .
’

What s the m atter with the child I as k ed one of these

’ ”

women looking at me shrewdly .

,

H e s a sof tie explained Pasco . He was hit by a mad

’ ’

m
,

dog not so lon g ago an d I taking him to London for to

,
’

see ifhe can be cu

’
red .
Poor child said the wom an ; an d wo ul d have taken me on
her l ap ; b ut Pasco would not allow it decl aring I was very ,

treacherous an d not to be trusted having a trick ofbiting ,

’

people. And I was far too f rightened to speak up fo r my self

when he glared round at me .

We reached the Swan with -two-necks on the even ing of
-
the d ay after we had started the j ourney having took us ,

thirty six hours an d I fancy Pasco was as glad as I to

,

get to the end ofit ; for I must have been a pretty source
ofanxiety to him who co u ld not n ap even because of the
,

necessity of watching me . I do not remember an instant

during the whole ride when he was not on the alert an d I had ,

but to shifi : on my seat to have his m alignant face turned

towards me. I suppose he suf fered fro the qualms of a m
guilty con science ; but I was too brow-beat an d inti idated m
m
to ake an y ef fort on my own behal f an d in such an agita ,
16 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
tion ofmind that I had on ly one story to tell an d that was ,

the one he had dinned into my ears with such in fi n ite pains
an d patience .
The hou
’
se he took me to in London was near St. Martin s

Lane over by Charing Cross an d behind the Royal Mews.

m
, ,

Here he was welcomed by a wo an who I took to be his wife ,

for he gave her a b uss an d she gave him twenty at the least.
,

And is this him she asked looking at me.

m
,

Y es he said an d pinched my ar ; thi s is the little

’
, ,

white rabbit I was telling you of an d he s caught an d will ,

’
,

tell youal l about him sel fifyouaskhim .

‘

What have yougot to tell asked the woman ofme, in a

voice that was not unkindly .
And I pattered out :
My father is dead an d my mother is dead an d my name
, ,

is Jimmy Ra bbit an d my g u ardi an D r. Pasco is taking me

, , ,

to be schooled . ’

Pasco gave a grin an d winked at the woman . ,

Talk ofteaching magpies to chatter! He s cleverer than ’

y magpie I ll take my oath . He bent over an d whispered

,
’ ’

a f ew word s into her ear an d she looked at me cu riously .

,

H e stays here went on Pasco an d m u st be cared for.

’
, ,

There s money in the little white rabbit an d he l ugged me

’

by the ear to show me up.

Are youhungry dear P asked the wom an .
”

I nodded my head for truth to tell I had ate nothing

, , ,

since the morning .

Then come you down with me she said an d carried me ,

”

below into the kitchen where was another woman who , ,

HasPasco come back P ’

Y es said S arah which was the name ofthe wom an I had

’
, ,

took to be his wife .

’
And is thi s the brat P
Sarah nodded an d went to fe tch some victuals for me from
,
 L I IT L E WHITE R ABBIT 17
'

So, id the second woman an d chucked me roughly

’

m
sa ,

under the chin to ake me hold my f ace u p to view an d ,

stood with her hand s on her skinny hip s staring at me. And
who are you ? And where do youcome from
My father is dead
Eh she interrupted holding her hand behind her ear , ,

fo r she was a little deaf.

My father is dead I sho uted an d my mother is dead ,
’
, ,

an d my n ame is Jimm y Ra bbit an d my gu ardi an D r. Pasco , , ,

is taking me to be schooled .
’

There came a hoarse chuckle behind me an d there was ,

Pasco standing in the doorway his shoes of f wagging his , ,

head .
So y ou re back Pas co said the skinny wom an .
’
,

Y es Moll he an swered ; an d then tu rning to me Little

’
, , , ,

—
white rabbit hey he asked an d tapped his pocket . ,

I nodded an d shuddered .
What s that youkeeps a saying about little whi te rab b
’
- it ?
in q uired Sarah coming back at thi s moment .
,

—
Jimmy is a little white rabbit aren t you Jimmy he ’
,

asked me with a cru el grin .

Something in my frightened face m ust have touched Sarah ,

for she said q uite snappi shly

Let be Pasco youre frightening the child an d he s
,
’
,
’

clammed with hunger. And then to my utmost surpri se ’

, ,

dropped on her knees an d fold ing herarm s ro und me Don t

, ,
’

ou mind Pasco she said ; 1

1 t ke care of y ou . A nd
’
P
’

m m
y a,

pressed me to her a ple bosom an d gave e a kiss.

But over her shoulder I could see Pasco s evil eyes fi xed on
’

me keen as a kite s an d his hand tapping the pocket which

,
’
,

contained the knife .

 C H APTE R II
THE SEL EC T C OFFEE HOUSE

Is I have given a particular acco unt of the circumstances

connected with my kidn apping it is b , ecause they had such
an ef fect on my childi sh mind that I never attempted to
assert my real identity b ut at once accepted the new one
m
,

thrust upon me . Jimmy Rabbit I became an d Jim y ,

Rabbit I rem ained for m any a long year ; an d was soon so

habituated to it that although I remembered my real name
,

was B essy when on occasions it recu rred to me it was as

’
, ,

something with which I no longer had an p ractical concern .

y
O fmy parents I soon ceased to think being f ul l y persuaded
m
,

they were d ead ; an d although thi s ay sound heartl ess you ,

m ust remember how y oung I was an d how easily a child

,

f orgets big things an d how tenaciously remembers sm all

,

ones.
And now Who was Dr. Pasco ? Th at is a question it
,

would be d if ficul t to give a preci se an swer to t ho ugh you

m m
,

ight su him up shrewdly enough as a most damn able

rogu e an d scoundrel . He was by profession a surgeon an d
m
,

had served with the ar y in the Low Countries b ut lef

,t it
without the formality ofresigning I believe what time we
, ,

were being m ade to run by Pichegru an d Jourd ain an d the ,

Duke ofY orkin the greatest hurry ofal l to run the bri skest .
m
I have a suspicion some ofthat sa e unseemly hurry accel
erated the withdrawal ofD r .Pasco fro m a cheerl ess scene an d ,

good reason to suppose Pasco was not the name he wen t und er
Q0 TH E QUE E N CAN DO NO WR ONG
with whom Pasco struck up an acquaintance an d presen tly ,

entered into a contract with to assist him in his business ,

being that of a crimping agent to supply soldiers to the

army . The which was an extreme profi tabl e trade in those
days when there was a hot deman d for recruits an d no
, ,

questions asked . It was Pasco s duty to pass the men in his

’

q uality ofsurgeon for which he was liberally paid although

, , ,

ifhe were too d ru nk Gale was quite able to assume the part
mm
,

ofhis locu tea s . And Pasco received the f ull bo unty f or

an y recruits he was able to supply an d no deduction s what

,

—
ever an d supplied many .
The Select Cof fee House was in ef f a -
ect a g mbl ing den a ,

Crimping Shop an d a House of Ill -fame combined . Pasco

,

made a genteel -looking af f

air ofit in its external appearan ce ,

with curtains an d f lowers in the windo ws to make it strike

m
floricso e an d plenty ofwax candles an d mi rrors an d velvet
,

upholstered f urniture in the Assembly R oom (as he called it) .

And he took into his employment several decoy women ,

whose d uty it was to trap the unwary into thi s establish

ment.
There were m any methods resorted to of despoiling those
unfortunate victim s. The fi rst thing was to make them d run k
( if they we re not so already ) an d then
, they we re dealt with
accord ing to how they were like to cu t u p. Some ind uc ed to
play cards which always brought them in debtors to the ban k
m
,

others turned over to the wo en who soon contrived to fleece

,

them ofeverything they had on them . I fhowever it chan ced , ,

that they had no money an d no mean s to paythemselves out ,

they were carried round to D r . Gal e s after being silenced

’

with a knock on the head or a drugged drink an d shipped ,

he hath wrote, d oes m m m

en tion hi at so e l en gth . I t is m
m
h
m m
y p ,0 e a s
I k n ow it is Mr. Fyveways a b ition , to see h is b ook i prin ted so e
’

d ay, an d shou m m
l d this co e to pass, you ay k n ow it b
m
h l
m m y t e t it e h e
hath given it ( uch again st u b
m y j g d en t, ein g al to ge th e r too
flowery) , n a el y, A Free Lan ce in a Far Lan d .
’
 THE SELECT C O FFEE H O USE 21

f
or ser vice in the army of the East Indi a Company where ,

there was little chan ce oftheir ever being heard ofagain ; an d

Pasco drew the bounty money oftwenty guineas for each an m ,

an d no dedu ctions beyond what was right to pay for a bottle

to be drunk between him an d Dr. Gale .
There happened cases when the victim was too far gone in
drink when he came to be rob b ed in what youmigh t call his , ,

sen ses ( God save the m ark l) ; that is so f ar overtaken with ,

his liq uor that he could neither be coz en ed by the women n or ,

cheated at cards an d then he was made to pay for the clock .

,
’

This was a very clever device ofPasco s own invention . I ’

can call to mind the beginn ing ofit when he ca e home one m
m
,

d ay with two fi n e cl ocks under his ar that were identical in ,

appearance an d f or which he had p aid ten gu ineas apiece .

m
,

The one he set on the antel shelf an d t he other deliberately

,

let drop on the floor an d fell to completi n g its destruction

m m
, ,

with the andirons. Y ou ay be sure we thought him ad ,

who saw him do thi s senseless thing ; b ut there was a method in

his m adness. Thereaf t er whenever a new gull was brought into
the Select Co f fee Ho use his attention was attracted casually
m
,

a s it ight b e to the
, so und clock on the m antel shel f an d he
- ,

was as ked Did the time ofd ay agree with his own ? or some
,

su ch question designed to make him observe the handsome

timepiece in its position .
I fthe gu ll turned out one of those weak headed ones who
-

went of f like a stone an d with nothing worth taking in his

pocket he was accommod ated with a night s lodging an d ’

m
, ,

in for ed the next morn ing that in his frenz y overnight he

had broke the clock . The sound one being hid the wreck
’
,

ofthe othe r was p araded an d the bill prod u ced the which ,

showed ten guineas paid an d receipted for it. As for

witnesses there was the bul ly Pasco kept whose name was
, ,

Shrank an d the decoy women so that the victim might

, ,

swear an d p rotest as he chose but was trapped an d not

,

allowed to leave the Select Cof fee House until he had paid or
lodged security for the amount.
22 T HE QUEEN CAN D O NO WRONG
That broken clock brought Pasco in some hundreds of
pounds I do declare .
,

Then there was another diabolic b usiness he undertook ,

which was the kidn apping ofmen whom it was wanted to get
ou t ofthe way; or the ab d ucting ofwomen or children as he ,

had me . In these matters he was a m uch more audaciou s

rogu e than Gale . But this was a dangerous ri sq ue an d not ,

alway s to b e come at f or a m an cannot es tablish a rep u

, tation
for that sort ofwo rk withou t peril ofbeing laid by the heels.
Still every now an d again such a job cropped up an d a
, ,

thumping big payment to carry it through. Only there was

the ri sq ue an d youknow the proverb ofthe pitcher that goes
,

to the well too often .

Had Pasco been anything b ut a drunken dissipated rogue
m
,

he had assuredly made a pretty fortune out ofhis da nable

dealings in human flesh an d blood ; for during the six years
I con sorted with him he had a wonderf ul protection fro ill m
, , m
l uck an d you ight say a free charter for crimping. He
,

was acqu ainted with Colonel H an ger a noto rio u

, s whol esale

agent f or su pplying recruits to the Crown an d a man with

m
,

uch interest in high ci rcl es an d even with Royalty being ,

one of the most renowned j udges ofcock-fi ghtin g an d pri ze

fi ghtin g of that day an d as such credited by the D uke of
,

York an d noticed by the Prince of Wales. Moreover

m
,

D r. Gale was a cautious an d experienced band who seldo

m
,

ade a slip an d it was as good as an insu

, rance policy to be
working wi th such an old fox at the trade. But Pasco was
too f ond ofthe wine an d the women an d it was ever easy
m
,

come an d easy go with hi . The wench in favour could

twist him round her fi n ger an d the wench out offavo ur had
m
,

hi in the hollow of her han d. Although he lived by

robbing there was never a m an more robbed than Pasco

m
,

hi sel f. There were the constables an d the police of ficers to

be bribed an d the pimps an d women with whom he sur
,

rou nded himsel f. A gay house of the description of the

Select Cof fee House coul d not be carried on free of black
 THE SELECT C O FFEE HOUSE 23

mailing an d I make no scruple to say the greater part of

m
,

Pasco s profi ts were extorted fro him by the greedy minions

’

ofthe l aw an d the b u l lies an d she-devils in whose p ower he

was did they chu
, se to l a an in f
y o rm ation .

S uch then was the house in which I was brought up from

, ,

my fourth to my eleventh year. As soon as I was grown big

enough to m ake myselfuseful I became a sort ofhan dy-boy
to run the errands fetch wine f ,
ill the glasses of the poor
,

fools who f req u ented the establi shment an d stand ready to

m
,

d o what was hidden me. You ay be sure my wits were

early sharpened in the company I was called upon to attend
an d keep an d fro m
whom I received more kicks than ha pen ce.
,
’

Devil s Shrimp they came to call me an d I m ake no doubt

’
,

I deserved the design ation whose fi n gers learnt to pick an d

,

steal an d whose tong u

, e to use the foulest language of the
most aban doned be o re I ad shed my baby teeth . I could
f h -

bring wron g c han ge for a guinea from which I had fi l ched a

,

shilling with a complete air of childi sh inn ocence be f

, ore I
was eight ; an d f or nicking the gambling cou n ters ( th at were

as good as money ) or gleani n g the carpet f or dropped coins

there never was an y quicker or more cunning than I . And I

was ever a f avou ri te with the decoy wo en who ( I bl u m
sh to,

state it) wo u l d swear I had the f ace ofan angel an d k i ss an d ,

cuddle me till I fought an d struggled myself free from thei r

embraces. I cannot say there was an y good in these poor
creatures but there was a sort offi erce love an d protection
,

shown me in general that was perh ap s the l ast link between

m
, ,

the an d an y good . An d I have known one of them give

Pasco a good round sm ack in the face for beating me .
The which he oftentimes did an d yet with a comm an d
,

over his passions youmight expect to see in a person who was

thras hing a favourite dog an d did not desire to render it un
saleable . I was an income to Pas co as he let out once when ,

I was ill ofsome disorder an d he had an apothecary in to

,

treat me having no faith lef t in his own prof essional attain

m
,

e nts whose hand n ow shook too m u

, ch to blood a patient.
24 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO W RONG
The apothecary after the m anner ofhis kind shook his head
, ,

an d vowed mine was a seriou s case . By God he m ust be ,

cured cries Pasco ; he s as good as a hundred guineas a’

year in my pocket. And will be worth a thousand some d ay.

’

I remembered it more by token ofthe amount mentioned an d ,

a won der whether ifI was worth that to Pasco I co u

, ld not ,

be worth something to mysel f. And it set me thinking an d

specu lati n g how I could realiz e y own val ue for myself but m ,

witho ut ever suspecting it was connected with that home

which I had forgotten saving for the incident ofthe little
,

white rabbit an d that my Chri stian name was B essy. As for

my father when I had as ked about him as child ren will
, ,

do I was told he was a traitor who had been executed in

,

the rebellion in Ireland an d an outlawry procl aimed against

m
,

al l his f amily an d only

, ysel fsaved from his fate by Pasco s ’

benevolence. It was not therefore fro m my parentage th at

, ,

an y su ggestion could arri ve of my being worth so m uch to

Pas co . An d I was fain to give up the problem after m uch
specu lation .
And now a word about Sarah Wells the wom an whom I ,

had conceived to be Pasco s wi f e. With the improvement in

’

m
his ci rcu stances the establi shment of the Select Cof
,
f
ee

House an d the engagement ofthe decoy women her position

, ,

was great] y changed Pas co neglected her an d she was no ,

longer mistress of the house for there was always a saucy ,

wench in f avo u r to whom f or the time he gave the rein s.

, ,

Sarah was not m arried to him an d he might have di scarded ,

her at an y moment as the brute told her of

, ten enough (an d ,

child as I was I always thought that the most evil trait in

,

his character seeing the love she showed him under many
,

af flict ion s) . And if he did not do so it was only becau se ,

( after h is si ste r le f
t which sh e did
, ve ry soon ) the re w as no
other woman in the house capable oftaking Sarah s place ’

who was sure one of the best most faithful an d mo st

, , , ,

devoted women that ever lived . And who sank to be little

better than cook an d housek eeper an d general drudge with ,
 THE SELECT COFFEE H OUSE 25

out any nece ssity to be paid wages. N otwithstan d in g the

loyalest companion an d helper to the tyrant who had ruin ed

her an d thrown her over an d at ti es used her most cruelly
, , m ,

an d beat her shocking.

She had the bringing up of me an d if I felt af

- fection for
m
,

anyone it was f or her. Certainly she showe d the sa e f or

m e f
, or after she was cast of fby Pas co I was the only creature
she had to love an d I think f ound a solace in it. Although
“

m
, , ,

I regarded her as a motherly wo an when I was fi rst kid

napped yet she was b
, ut a gi rl oftwenty at that ti e an d a m
,

year or two later a woman who wept in secret over her

sorrow s more than an I h ave ever kno w n . Yet eve r to the
y
las t passionately d evoted to her tyrant an d would not have ,

a word said again st him . Once when I cu rsed him f or a

coward who had j ust le ft her writhing in pain on the floor so

, ,

that even my callous young soul was shocked shé turn ed on ‘

,

me as savage as ifit had been I who struck her the blow .

And then the next moment sudden an d un reasonable as a ,

woman melted an d snatched me up in her arm s with a wailing

m m
, ,

reproach of Oh Ji m y Jim y— don t sa anythi n g again st

’

y
m
, , ,

him ! Y ou can t understand . D id you but know hi a

’

f ew years b ack an d he was a brave gall ant gentlem an

, I ,

protest. ’

The which I took occasion to doubt though I did not tell ,

S arah so for fear ofhurting her feelings. For though when ,

I fi rst clapped eyes U pon Pasco there was a certain spurious ,

sm artness in his atti re an d bearing he was ever a low - bred , ,

cowardly cur who showed his true nature when he butchered

,

that little white rabbit to impress the mind ofa child . Af ter
he started the Select Cof l ee House an d the d ecoy wo en he
'

m
f ell off an d my recollection of him at the l ater period is of
,

a sodden bloated tru , culent brute con stantly cursing an d

, ,

swearing d ru nk most d ays an d nights ofhis life to whom

, ,

no fi n e coat an d scarlet waistcoat no fashionable pantaloons ,

(j us t then coming in to vog u e ) no whi ske rs a n d m ac aroni t

,a il ,

cou ld lend the tone ofrespectability he as pired to di splay

26 THE QUE EN CAN DO NO WRON G
‘

what time he p resided over the revels ofhis establish ent m ,

an d endeavou red to invest them with an air off ashion . To

m
the end he aped the anners of his superiors an d would ,

tolerate famili arity from no one whom he did not conceive

to b e ofsu perior parts an d breeding.
An d n ow I m ust get on with my story which is one that
,

has to make a long leap now an d again an d cannot stop to

,

l ook close at the obstacles. I have said that Pasco would

occasionally undertake a job to dispose ofpersons whom it
was wanted to get ou t ofthe way an d it was this that p roved
m
,

his un doin g . So we co e to the year 1802 when the Treaty,

ofAmien s had j u st been signed an d it was f ully believed we

m
,

were entering a period ofextended peace when he was te pted

m
,

in to a b usiness which broke him an d sent hi to Botany Bay.

There was a great talk ofa reduction in the Navy an d Army ,

an d Pasco f eared a diminution in the trade he had been

driving w hich circumstance induced him to give a will ing ear
,

to a certain proposal made him by a woman to get rid ofher

h usband for her.
m
One mornin g in the early sum er ofthat year there ca e m
a well -looking yo u ng female to the house an d asked to see
,

Pasco on private b usin ess. It was I who opened the door to

her an d recogni sed her at once as the wi f e of a weal thy
m
, ,

tradesm an in Covent Garden a an m uch older than hersel f

, ,

an d who had the rep u tation ofbeing both a skin flin t an d a

curmudgeon ; I was instantly seiz ed with a ighty great m
curiosity to know what brought such a wom an as this to our
'

house at ten ofthe clock in the mornin g an d in a con sider

,

abl e palpitation as I cou

,
ld gather from her manner.
I had by thi s time gro wn into an uncommon sharp brat ,

with ears like a lynx an d the ability to m ake the most ofan y
m
keyhole . I ay say there was nothi n g went on in the Select
Coffee House that I did not know something about. For thi s
m
Sarah had as m uch to an swer as ysel f f or she u
, sed me as a

u pon P sco s action s to bring her inf orm ation abo ut his
’
s
py a
carryings ou. There was a smal l room at the back of the
 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
I f it wasn t for your pretty eyes says Pasco an d the
’
,
’
,

desi re to accommod ate so sweet charming a l ad y it would , ,

be twice two hun d red pounds. ’

Bu t where shall I get the money f

"
rom i
Y oucan give me a bill f or it says Pasco in his cunning ’
,

way an d redeem it af
, ter your husband is shipped of f to
India. ’

That I wil lingly agree to says she ifyouwill write it ,

’
,

out f or me to sign .
’

I will tell youwhat to write says he an d brought her ,

’
,

pen an d paper an d dictated to her a form ofdocument that

,

completely compromised her in her own handwriting. No

sooner was the sand shook of f an d the paper in his han ds
than he changed his tune .
Mrs. Hewitt says he folding up the promise to pay an d
,
’
,

putting it into his pocket before I enter upon thi s business

,

I must see whether your husband will pay more than youfor
to cancel it. ’

She saw she was trapped an d gave a scream an d tried to ,

snatch the p aper back but too late. Then she of

,
f
ered to
buy it back but that would not suit Pasco . And I can tell
m
,

outhere was a pretty scene over it al l an d Pasco aster of

y ,

the situ ation .

At las t af
, ter she had worked herself through all the
stages of weeping threatening imploring an d hysterics he
, , , ,

began to approach her with a view to an accommodation .

Who is the gentlem an he asks.
What gentle an m
m
T he an youre doing thi s f
’ ’

m
or.

She would not tell for a long time an d then it ca e out , ,

She had a paramour an d thi s plot had been concocted

m
,

between the to get her bush an d out ofthe way.

Go to that gentlem an says Pasco suddenly t urned very
’

m m
, ,

gri an d m asterful an d get two hundred pounds fro him

, ,

an d you r job is done . An d if he won t pay f or you why

’
, ,

then you r husband w ill an d w illingly .

’

, ,
 TH E SELECT C O FFEE HOUSE 29

She went of f an d that same af

, ternoon f etched the money ,

an d then wanted her bill back . Bu t Pasco woul d not part

from su ch a piece of evidence only promised to carry the
,

aff air throu gh. To thi s she was bro ught to agree as also to ,

redeem the bill when it was accompli shed ; f or in al l these

tran sactions her ardour to get rid of her husband seemed

in creas ed rather than abated by the way she blamed an d
cursed him for getting her into this quandary as though it ,

was his f ault !

Fin ally a scheme was concocted by her an d Pasco by which
,

Hewitt was to be inveigled into the Select Cof fee House.

This presented considerable d if ficu l ties for he was an au stere

m
,

an of rigid moral s an d a regu lar church attendant who ,

could never be tempted into such a pl ace for dissipatio n .

Bu t his wi f e was equal to the occasion an d suggested he ,

sho u ld be ind uced to call on some bogus business in his

way of trade which was that of a mirror an d chandelier
,

m aker. So an order was wrote an d the next d ay I was sent

,

with it asking Mr. Hewitt to attend an d supp] y an estimate

,

for a l arge new mirror f or the A ssembly R oom .

Thi s brought him to the house quite unconscious an d the ,

next thing was to hocus him . But try how Pasco an d the
,

women would they could not succeed in tempting him to

,

take an y refreshment when he recogni sed the character of

the house . H e was indeed a so ur fellow an d one of what
, , ,

the Scots cal l the unco guid who minded nothing b

" ’
ut
m
,

money aking an d abhorred conviviality except that foul

-
, ,

liq uor called whi sky which he would drink privately in his
,

own bedroom on the Sabbath as Mrs. Hewitt mentioned .

m
,

Which wil l sho w youwhat savage manner of an he was for ,

it is only the wild Irish an d the wild Scots a nd the pigs that
drink that abomin ated distillation .
In the end a quarrel was picked with Hewitt by Shrank ,

who was the bully ofthe establi shment an d the po or devil ,

knocked down an d stunned ; an d as he l ay on the f loor

m
Pas co dealt hi a blow on the skull that m ust have f ractu red
30 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
it, as intended . I saw it done with my own eyes an d
he ,

knew what was in Pasco s mind when he delivered it.

’

By su nri se the next morning Hewitt was on b oard the ,

Cl aren ce East Indi am an with al l his f orged papers made out

m
, ,

to appear in ord er though he himsel f was senseless f ro

m
,

concussion ofthe brain . Y ou ay thin k thi s an impossible

outrage ; but I can tell you it was not only possible but a
m
,

common enough one in those d ays ofwhich I a writing when ,

the crimping house

- an d the press gang robbed m an y an d
-

man y a respectable citi z en of his liberty an d sent him to

m
,

serve again st his will in the Ki n g s navy or ar y .

’
, ,

As it happened however in thi s particular instance Pasco

, , ,

overreached himself. He got his second two hundred pound s

from Mrs. Hewitt who af ter making a prodigious outcry
, ,

abo u t her missing husband en gaged her paramour to conduc t

,

the shop . There was a great f estivity in the Select Cof fee
House with the money gotten over this foul b usi n ess a rare
m
,

plu ; but Pasco was shrewd enough to give the amount as

only two h un d red pound s which he divided—a hund red to
m
,

hi self fi fty to D r. Gal e twenty to the bully an d the rest

, , ,

to the others with a crown to myself. All apportioned with

,

a great show ofj u stice not to sa

y gene rosity .
, It was only

I who knew there was another two hundred the rogue had
pocketed hi self. m
The mon ey was scarce spent than retribution overtook al l
those who had a principal hand in it. It happened the Claren ce
carried a very full d raft ofrecruits an d a an in the con dition , m
of Hewitt was better spared than took. So when the ship
p u t in at Spithea d to em b
ark her passengers in the great

cabin he was landed an d sent to the hospital there.

,

When he came to his sen ses he was soon able to establish ,

his position b ut having some suspicions about his wif

, e d id ,

it so craftily as to cause no alarm . Having in the fi rst

instance communicated privately with a friend of his he ,

learnt the true position of af f

ai rs an d obtained money
m
,

su fficien t to b uy hi sel fout of the service an d complete his ,

 THE SELECT CO FFEE H O USE 31

cure without anyone imagining other than that he was on his

way ou t to Indi a.
Then one day he returned to London his plans al l ripe.
,

And the fi rst thing Pasco knew ofit was a knock at the door ,

an d there was Hewitt an d two constables an d a warrant f or

his arrest .
Luckily for him he had caught sight ofwho it was from
m
,

the win dow ofthe Assembly R oo from which it was the

m
,

custom of the house to reconnoitre people before ad itting

them ifthe knock was not familiar.
m
,

I had heard the knock an d was co ing upstai rs from the

,

kitchen to open the door an d reached the h all to fi n d Pasco

,

shooti n g al l the bolts an d his f

ace as livid as a m an s going
’

,
 C H APTER III
I AM RESC UED FROM PA SC O

‘
J I MMY hissed Pasco in y ear as he caught me by the
,
’
m ,

wri st youve got to come along with me .

,
’ ’

Where to i I asked . ”

Askno q uestion s said b e ro ughly an d began to ascend

’
, ,

the stairs.
We reached the garret l anding where was a trap -door ,

leading to the roof an d a l ight lad der kept ready I think

, , ,

for su ch an emergency as thi s. Sarah s room was on that ’

floo r an d she in it who now came running out.

m
, ,

What s the atter P she asked catching sight ofPasco s

’ ’
,
’

face .

Hell s ruin he an swered an d began to fudd le the ladder

’
,

a ga i n st the trap -d oor with one hand .

What are youdoi n g Pasco i ,
”

Get youbelow he said an d see the door is not opened ; ,

an d when it s broke in I ve gone to the co unt y the e

’ ’
sa r
y , s
— —
two days pa t. Yorkshire Ireland anywhere . Gone th ese
s

two days. ’

Oh Pasco she cried piteously what does it al l mean

, ,

H e had fi xed the lad der.

Up with you J immy an d open the trap he said an d
’
, , , ,

pushed me up the rungs for al l thi s time he had not let my ,

wri st go.
As I crawled up an d butted at the boards with my head I ,

saw Pas co whi sperin to S arah below me And then he did

g .

3 2 1]
 I AM RES C UE D FROM PASCO 33

what I had not seen him d o for two years pas t— gave her a
buss an d the poor soul burst out crying .
,

H e p ushed her toward s the head of the stairs an d she ,

began to run do wn them but stopped when she had gotten ,

a f ew steps an d cal led ou

, t
Where shall I write to youi ”

The P ieb ald H arse in the Boro u gh . Hark ! They re ’

heating at the door ! Down with you my l ass an d keep , ,

them in parley . Gone these two days to the country , , ,

mind . ’

H e turned to me who by thi s time had p ushed up the

m
,

trap . On to the roof J im y he ordered an d followed .

, ,
’
,

Then drew the l adder up after him an d let the trap down ,

in its place again . Next reconnoitred the roofs on either

side an d began scrambling toward s one tal ler th an the rest
, ,

which l ay in the di rection of the river further down the

street m aking me precede him .
, It was perilo us work for ,

the roofs were not protected by an y parapet an d we had to ,

st rad d le the ridge an d m ake ou r way alo n g as best we co u

, ld ,

with the lad der to be hauled behind . However after great ,

exertion we reached the taller roof climbed up on to it

, , ,

pulled the ladder after us an d Pasco fi xed it so that it ,

sho u ld not slip but af ford us a secure footin g on the slope

, ,

an d we crou ched d own behind a stack ofchimneys.

By thi s time Pasco s nerves were so shook that the sweat
’

m
poured from hi j ust as ifhe had i ssued from under a pu m p.
m
,

H is teeth chattered an d his whole f rame tre bled an d the

, ,

visible fear an d agitation ofhim emboldened me to askwhat

was the m atter.
Speak a word an d I ll pitch you into the street he
,
’

snarled an d poi n ted to the gul f belo w. An d then I think

m
,

so e stray recollection of that time he kidnap ped me re

curred to him for he added : The soldiers are after
,

What for i I asked in fear an d tre b

”
ling too who
, m , , had
never yet lost my childi sh fright ofthe redcoats.
34 T HE QUEEN CAN D O N O WRONG
They want yuf
oor a r ebel s ’
son , an d me f
or harbouring
you Ah
.

The excl am ation was extorted from him by something

seen thro u gh the chimneys on the stack where he was keep ,

ing watch an d he laid his hand on my shoulder an d glared

, ,

at me to keep silence wi th an indication th at ifI disobeyed

he would p ush me down the sloping roof.
I was at a lower level than he an d not in a position to
,

peep an d see what had arrested his attention but I mad e no ,

u
do bt it was a soldier clambering up through the trap door -

of ou r hou se . I l ay as still as I could scarce daring to ,

breathe for some min utes until Pasco after several times
, , ,

reconnoitring the dan ger satisfi ed himsel fit had passed an d

, ,

rel axed his grip ofme .

There was a sm all parapet about a foot high to the par
ticu l ar roofwe were clinging to which permitted a cautious
,

descent to the gutter an d n ow there floated up sounds of

,

sho u ting from the street below. As they fi rst reached my ear
I glan ced up at Pasco. His face had gone green an d mottled
with fright an d he glanced at me like a wounded cat at bay.
m
,

Instinct told e he was in dead ly danger an d I conceived

m
,

myselfto b e the same . He motioned me to let hi pass on

,

the lad der an d slowly rung by rung lowered himsel fdown

, , ,

the sloping roo finto the gutter an d peered over. But some
projection of the building underneath prevented him from
seeing into the street . So he beck oned me to join him an d
m
,

I crept down backward s on y hand s an d knees till he

reached ou t an d drew me to his side . Then he told me to
stand on the p arapet an d swing mysel f o u tward whi l st he ,

held my hand .
n ar w a s ru
I vow a d decl e it as mo t c el a d blood curdling.
n -

thing of thi s monster to propose to a child such as I was.

The very idea of it froz e me with horror. I begged an d
m
prayed hi to let me of f an d struggled an d held back to the
m
,

best of my ability. But he caught me by the ar in his

g rea t strong g rasp an d threatened to th row me over if I did
36 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
crashin g glass an d now an d then a high pitched stone
,

cl attering on the roofs a little way of f an d rattling do wn the ,

tiles with a noise like a stick drawn bri sk across railings. At

last Pasco spoke
Jimmy do youwant to die P ,
’

No no I declared being now a little recov ered .

’
, , ,

Well cease crying an d take spirit ; for ifyou don t it s

,
’
,
’

over the roofwith you. Now then w ill youcome with me P , ,

’

Y es I ll come I answered f aintly .

’ ’
, ,

Crawl forward s to the end ofthe row he said an d keep ,

’
,

your n ut out ofsight . Crawl low along the gutter. ’

I did as he ordered me an d the gutter extending to the ,

end ofthis line ofhouses we reached there without necessity ,

to take to the ridge again . Then he slanted the ladder up

the roof an d told me to climb to the top an d spy for a trap
,

door which I did but found none.

, ,

H e gave a curse an d ordered me down an d began levering

m
,

up one of the tiles which took him some little ti e ; b ,

ut
having gotten one out of its pl ace the others followed easy
enough an d in a few inutes there was a hole in the roof
, m
big enough for us to get through . Meanwhile the uproar in
the street was growing prodigiously an d several times Pasco ,

sq uinted over the parapet with scared eyes ; but his vi sion
was impeded an d I was greatly terrifi ed he wo u
, ld require
me to swing out again . I was however spared this for with , , ,

a su dden impatient oath he cocked his leg over the hole he

, ,

had m ade an d drove his heel through the l ath an d plaster

,

ofthe ceiling .

As l uck had it the hole was m ade j ust over a b ed on ,

to which the plaster dropped without m akin g an y noise .

H aving satisfi ed him self of this an d that the room was ,

empty Pasco quickly enlarged the aperture li fted me through

, ,

it an d j
, umped down after me .
We found ourselves in a garret an d some clothes hun g on ,

book s behin d the door. Pasco whipped of fa coat an d tried

it ou but he was too stout to squeez e into the arm s. So he
,
 I AM RES C UE D FROM PA SCO 37

purloined a hat having come away without his an d opening

, , ,

the door peered down the stairs.

,

It happened that al l the inhabitants ofthe house were out

in the street attracted by the riot that was going on there
m
, ,

which was in fact the ob wrecking the Select Cof

, ,
f
ee
Hou se . Thi s lef t the wayclear for us to descend . B ut when
we got near the hall although the door was open the cluster
, ,

ofpeople on the doorstep th reatened ou r escape .

In this dilemm a Pasco turned his attention to the b ack of

the house where was a small flagged court with a high wall
, ,

shu tting it of ffrom a lan e that ran down to the river. In a

moment his mind was m ade up. Kicking of fhis shoes he ,

took them in his hand an d stole quietly down the last flight
ofsta irs an d to the f ront -door which he slammed an d shot ,

the bolts.
Co me down he cried to me as he got his shoes on
,
’
,

again whil st the people ou tside began to hammer at the door.

m
,

Then he dived down the base ent stairs an d into the kitchen ,

running pl ump again st a big fat woman who was evidently ,

going up to open the door.

We were both of us by this time a pretty sight our ,

clothes al l dirty an d stained with the fil th ofthe gutter an d ,

ou r h ands an d f aces grimed wi th soot an d speckled with the

powder of the pl aster. Pasco was worse than I since he ,

sweated violently an d everything adhered to his f

, ace . The

app arition ofu s gave the wom an a terrible f right f or she ,

emitted a scream an d attempted to p ush past us to the

,

stai rs.

Bu t Pasco stretched ou t an d cau ght her by the hair ofher

head an d with one tug brought her to the ground an d there
, ,

gave her a kick in the side that knocked al l the breath clean
ou t ofher an d lef , t her gasping like a fi sh in a boat . There
was a cupboard by the side ofthe fi re pl ace an d he ordered ,

me to open it an d into it he bundled the poor fat wom an

m
,

upside down as you ay say an d locked her in not without

, , ,

some dif fi cul ty to get her sq ueez ed into the space .

38 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Next he whipped up a small table an d bidding me bring
, , ,

a ch ai r m ade his way to the cou

, rt behind an d in two min u tes ,

we were over the wal l an d running down to the river s side ’

,

where happened to be a wherry mad e fast to the stairs.

Into it we j um ped an d Pasco began sc ulling across in a
m
,

cl umsy lands an fashion .

,

By this time he was b ut the wreck of the big-mouthed ,

swaggering rascal who tried to a e the fi n e entlem a n and

, p g ,

was never known to pu t him sel f to the slightest physical

exertion . H e was one to who fi n o feathers m ade al l the m
di fferen ce an d to see him now al l bedraggled an d d irty
, , ,

p uf fed an d panting with his task at the sculls an d the pal ,

it ti c e ted by f ight le ft the ob server withou t

m
p a on r a r , an y
opinion ofhi whatever.
It was l ucky for us that the tide was sl ack el se I doubt if ,

his ability would have carried us over f or no sooner were we ,

l anded , an d proceeded a hundred yard s than he incontinently ,

sat do wn on a heap ofstones by the roadside an d began to ,

groan grie vously .

Jimmy said he to me pulling a shilling out of his
’

m
, ,

pocket run an d fi n d a tavern an d fetch me a d ram ofg .

, ,

And you shall have Sixpen ce for your pains when youcome
back .
I had not far to go to fi n d what was needed an d returned
m
,

wi th the ref reshment which did hi , much service for after ,

sitting a little w hile mopping his f ace an d recovering his

wind he rose up an improved an . Then he l ugged his

, m
purse out of his pocket an d I thought he was going to give
,

me my Sixpence but it was only to count how much he had ,

an d when he discovered something short of two gu ineas he ,

g ave vent to a p rodigio u s st ring of o ath s. Thi s was no time

f or me to
pu t f orw ard my cl aim a n d indeed he g
, ave me , ,

never a chance for catching me by the hand he lugged me

, , ,

along with m any a ru de jerk to m ake me keep up with him .

H is destination was the P ieb akl H orse a tavern in Tooley ,

Street with which he was evidently well acquainted for he

, ,
 I AM RES C UE D FROM PASCO 39

passed th rough the public room into a private parlour

behind an d cal l ed for a bottle ofwine an d writing m ateri al s.
,

When these were brought he wrote a letter to Dr . Gale an d

m
,

hired a an to carry it an d bring an answer back as soon as

,

he might . After that he seemed happier for he sipped his ,

wine with some reli sh an d smoked a pipe oftobacco with the

m
,

landl ord who treated hi with no little consideration .

,

Their conversation was about a large stock ofbrandy which

Pasco declared he had an intention of laying down for his
Select Cof fee House an d the landlord ( who was a sm uggler s
,
’

agent ) p rofessed his desire to supply . Pasco s assurance was ’

truly prod igious an d he vol unteered an explanation ofhis

,

begrimed condition by saying that he had b een grubbing in

some wine - vaults testing wine that had been of
, f
ered him ;
but he did not approve of the q uality who would have ,

nothing but the best no matter what the expense .

,

But all thi s fi n e l angu age was brou ght to a sudden termina
tion when the messenger arrived back wi th a letter f rom

D r . Gale. It was clearly not such a reply as Pasco had

expecte d for it threw hi into a violent temper being I
, m , ,

suspected a ref usal to send an y money . As he sat read ing it

, ,

with m any a cu rse an d grim ace the messenger took occasion

,

to mention there had been a riot in the S avoy an d the mob ,

had demo l i shed a hou se belon ging to a crimpi n g a ent .

g
Whose house was it i asked the l andlord . ”

Why some such name as Paskow an swered the an .

, ,
’
m
Hey an d is that so exclaimed the landlord turning his
, ,

eyes inquiring] y on Pasco.

The H ue an d Cryis out after him an d he d better fall into ,
’

the hands of the l aw than the hands ofthe mob for they ll ,
’

make short work ofhim . ’

At the fi rst sound ofhis n ame Pasco had pricked up his

ears an d when he heard the m an s further remark s hastily
,
’
,

ut his hand s into his pocket pu lled ou t a florin which he

p , ,

gave the messenger an d di smissed him .

,

What does al l this mean Dr. Pasco asked the l andlord .

,
40 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
The m an s a num sk ull declared Pasco braz enly . He s
’

,
’ ’

gotten the name Dr. Gale told him to deli ver the letter to
into his head . Y ou don t go for to think my Select Cof
’
f
ee
House could b e mi stook for a crimping den See that you
—
get that brandy for me Mr. Symes four cas k s ofit. And
,
’

etti g u he took me by the h nd d w gge ed ut fthe

m
g n
p , a an s a r o o

P iebal d H o e as ifhe were its most af fluen t an d respectable

m
custo er.
Bu t afew steps aw ay his m anner speedily changed an d he ,

pulled up in an unkind hesitation what to do still grabbing ,

me by the hand. As for mysel f I was in a pretty quandary ,

wi th it al l ; for you m ust bear in mind I had never caught

sight ofhis p u rsuers an d conceived they were soldiers an d
, ,

when I heard ofthe mob wrecking the house an d the Hue ,

an d C ry af ter him I acco u , nted myself the cause of it as ,

a yo u ng rebel to the King an d m uch worse implicated ,

than he.
At last af ter scratching his chin in thou ght for a f ull two
m
,

min utes he set of

, fdown the road with the air ofa an who
has a destination . Whereu pon I ventured to askhim where
we were going to now .
Hold your tongue he snapped unless you wi sh it cut
,
”
,

ButI
’
mve y hung y
r id I who had eaten nothing since
r ,
’
sa ,

break fast an d it was then three o clock .

,
’

D ye think thi s is the proper time to be hungry he

’

dem anded most unreasonably an d with a sudden fume of

m
,

ferocity in his tone an d gave my ar a cruel jerk that

,

nearly brought it out ofits socket. Hurry Up you spawn ,

ofhell ! T is youwhat s as b ad as a brace ofbracelets on my

’

legs. Hurry up ! hurry up And he l ugged me along so

ro ughly thrice that I was carried of
, ,
fmy feet an d fell in front
ofhis.

God grind me he cried impatiently but I shall be the ,

death ofyouafore I ve done with you. T is bad enough to

’

have to hoofit in the sun without a young devil like you ,

 I AM RE SCUE D FROM PASCO 41

sitting on my back . Take heed an d don t give me no more ’

’
—
lip or I l l kill you so that s plain .
’ ’

m
,

I scrambled to my legs as best I could ( for thi s an in his

m
moments of passion terrifi ed e as the tiger terrifles the
,

deer) an d he caught me by the hand again with a rapid snap .

,

There was something in his m anner which gave me the

impression he was intentional ly holding me p ri soner for he
m m
,

had always been f ar too fi n e a gentl e an to tou ch e before

m
,

save to beat me or kick e out ofhis way if I got into it .

And it was thi s un usual vigil ance on his part that put into
m head what wou ld neve r h ave come there o the r i e
w — the
m
s
y
su ggestion to break away fro him an d escape !
At fi rst wi thout an y thought than to run away as I had ,

been wont to do at the Select Cof ee House when I would

f ,

cree p into the cellar or under the bed s or stray the streets
,

until his fi t ofpas sion wore out an d always with the in ten
,

tion ofreturning. My idea now comprehended nothing more

than getting out of his reach an d following him by stealth
,

when he had given up the pursuit.

In a little while we got into the open country over by
Bermondsey where it was al l green an d fresh with m arket
,

gardens an d a complete new sight to my eyes who I think

, , , ,

had never been more than a mile away from the Savoy since
the d ay I was fi rst took thera There was a briskness in the
air very pleasing an d notwithstandi n g my hu
, nger an d my
fright ofPasco I f ound my spi rit growin g elated .
,

An d presently what should I see b ut the river where it ,

bends down by the Isle ofDogs an d the m as ts ofthe ships

,

ri sing like a forest from the docks.

m
I had once been in the co pany ofa l ad who used the sea
m
,

an d ade a voyage to a f oreign country where you got

oranges given youfor nothing an d had no need to wear more
,

clothes than a shirt an d a pai r ofbreeches. I listened to him

discoursing these an d other startling wonders on e d ay when
he was holding forth to a group ofboys collected at a street
m
co er an d they mad e an impression on my mind which I
,
42 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
never forgot. And now seeing the masts I also suddenly
m
, ,

reme b ered stories I had heard ofapprentices running away

m
fro cruel m as ters an d going to sea an d al l in a flash the ,

tho ght came to me Why should I not escape f

u — rom Pasco
an d ship as a sailor- boy ?
The afternoon was very hot an d he had slackened his
,

speed . Though he stil l held me by the wrist the clasp ofhis ,

hot greasy hand was relaxed an d there was an evident l assi

, ,

tude about him . He had often chw ed me in the Select Cof f

ee
House but was too bulky an d slow in his movements to come
m
,

at e ,who was a nim b le little imp. An d thi s gave me a

con fi d en ce that ifI was once ou t ofhis cl utch I had little to
fear. Moreover there was the Hue an d Cry out after him
, ,

an d I was implicated in it ( as I thou ght) an d where should ,

I be safer than on board a ship ?

Whilst I was thus cogitating we came to the open stretch
ofcommon by Bl ackheath with Green wich Park to ou
, r left.
The place was very deserted an d no one within hail except
,

three women from whom Pasco coul d expect no assi stance to

,

catch me . He was lost in thought his brow puckered an d , ,

his eyes fi xed g l oomily on the ground an d the sweat running ,

down his fat visage . For hal f an hour past he had not
spoke a word an d his pace had grown slowe r an d slower as
,

he shufll ed along the dusty road .

One more glance at the ships masts an d they see Ed to
’
, m
'

inspire me with courage . I gave my hand a tug an d broke ,

loose from my captor an d the next moment was scampering

,

across the heath as f as t as my little legs co uld strad dle it.

I heard him give an exclamation of surprise an d then ,

come pounding af ter me . Fear lent speed to my flight an d

m
,

I used every exertion j umping some of the s aller furz e

,

bushes an d skipping the obstacles on my way as I mad e

,

straight f or the river.

H e roared to me to stop vowing he would m urder me

,

when he caught me if I did not . His threat had the

opposite ef fect to what was intended . Stopping was the
44 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
t iking hand pulled my face up to a con venient angle an d
s r , ,

set to slapping my u nprotected cheek so savagely that in

my desperation I turned it an d gripped his wri st with my
teeth .
At that he lost control over him self an d gave me a blow ,

with his fi st that felled me an d the next second I felt a kick

,

on my leg followed by an excruciating pain an d the instinct

, ,

that it was no longer ofan y service to me .

m
I screa ed out an d implored mercy from him but without ,

av ail . Kick f ollowed kick as it had been a vicious m ule in fray

, ,

an d I gave u al l hope f eeling th at his th reat ( so con stan t )

p
m
,

to kill me was now to be realiz ed . I ay put it that I had

resigned m
ysel fto death when al l ofa sudden I heard hi
, , , m
give a startled ej aculation an d stagger back a step or two
, ,

an d a wom an s voice ring ou

’
t
Why youbeat d is poor boy i ”

m
And then between me an d hi rustled a ski rt an d I saw ,

the form ofa lad y drest in a fi n e lilac peli sse with a large
, ,

Leghorn hat an d feathers on her head take up a position to ,

protect me f rom the violence ofthis fi en d .

Hell an d damn ation roared Pasco in a voice ofastoni sh

ment an d rage . Who are you m ad am to interfere P, ,
’

One who hafd c power to hafa saucy ruflian puni shed ,

’

an swered the l ady with a very f oreign accent an d in a voice

m
, ,

ofste indignation .
We ll see as to that cried Pasco . Stand aside an d let
’
,

me get at the boy .

Dat you n efi er sal l do excl aimed the l ady an d as he

'
‘
.

approached stru ck him full 1n the face wi th a large green fan

she carried .

He li fted his hand to retali ate when at that moment ,

another l ad y an d a yo u ng gi rl came h urrying up in the

re atest agitation an d threw them selves between Pasco an d
g ,

my rescuer.
Oh mada
, m m ad am cried the elder lady come away . ,

Do not be embroiled in this af f ai r. Leave the brat . And she

’
 I AM RESCUE D FROM PASCO 45

caught hold of my rescuers hand ’

an d a ttempted to d rag
f
her of.

Harriet n ef l er ! D is brute sall answer f or his

'

Nefi er,
'

conduct as true as mine name is Caroline . Who are you

she dem anded of Pasco an d why you beat d is poor leetle
,

boy I ”

Who are you that asks he retorted rudely an d what ,

business is it ofyours
And he sq uared up to her in a threatening manner whil st ,

the elder lady tried to p ush him back an d the gi rl set of f ,

ru nnin g towards the road but without Pasco seeing her. ,

Y ousall soon fi n d out. Do not tink to f righten me ! De

m an d at vou l d strike a shil d like d at is a coward an d a ,

rogu e an d a villain
, Then she turned to me an d asked ,

V ot is yo u r n ame shil d

m
,

I
’
Jimmy Rabbit I sobbed as I l ay in agony on the
,
’

ground .
And is d is your father P ’

No no I cried . He s D r . Pasco . He says he will kill

,
’

me
V ot f or oubeat Shimmy Rabbit dem anded the l ady of
y
Pasco .
H e was running away .
’

An d vy yourun away asked the lady ofme .

T is Dr. Pas co that is running aw ay I cri ed pointing to
’ ’
, ,

the tyrant from the H ue an d C ry .

,
’

So said the lady an d nodded her head meaningly f

rom
”
, , ,

de Hue an d Cry . ’

Enough ofthis growled Pas co . Leave the boy to me

m
,

unless you wish some uncivil treatment. Ju p up at on ce

m m
,

Jim y an d co e with me
, .
’

Don t let him take me I cried an d tried to roll away

’

from him as he l u rched ro u nd the lady to catch me p ushing ,

her roughly aside with his elbo w .

In an instant she had flown at hi caught hi by the m , m
collar ofhis coat an d was calling to me to get up an d run
,
46 T HE QUEEN CAN D O NO WR ON G
whil st she held on to him . But I was i potent to ri se an d m ,

al l I co u ld do was to try an d roll dyer on the ground which ,

gave me agony more than enough .

Pasco sought to liberate himsel ffrom the l ady s grasp . ’

Let b e he cried or I shall strike you f , ine l ady or no ,

fi n e l ady .
’

Whereupon her companion seiz ed hi by the coat tail s - m ,

an d began p u lli n g away an d screaming for help at the top of

her voice . H e flu ng round to rid himselfofher an d then , ,

al l of a su dden recognised that there had been a thi rd

,

female an d she was gone. What with the suspicion that it

,

was f or assistance an d the o u tcry that was now rai sed an d

, ,

the elevated spot the struggle was taking place ou that could ,

be viewed from a far di stance a sudden panic seiz ed him . ,

And j ust then the second l ady called out something to him
which I was too faint an d diz z y to catch the meaning of an d ,

I saw Pas co give a great ju mp ofsurprise an d his face go ,

green an d mottled again as it had done on the roof-top in

,

the Savoy.
With a mighty ef fort he tore him sel ff ree from the f irst
lad y s grasp who still strove to detain hi with in co
’
, m m
parable resolution nearly bringing her to the gro und with
,

his v iolen ce an d t u rning rou

, ,nd ran away as fast as his legs
,

could carry him .

I s Yo u r Royal High n ess hu rt i c ried the second l ady d is
”
,

playing the most anxious solicitude .

Pho pho Harriet
, , Bu t dam n me if I co u , ld only ,

catch d at villain again And she hal fstarted to pursue him .

m m
Mada m adam ! I i plore you n ot to run an y furthe r
,

ri sq u e Pray p ray stop ! It is only by a miracle youhave

,

escaped from the monster. ’

To tink he should haf escapit cried the lady an d

m
,

sta ed h er foot ril y as she gaz ed at Pasco s dep arti n g

’

m
a

m
p n g
fi gu re . But dis poor leetle shil d I
‘
ust see to hi . ,

H él as b ut he do look white she exclaimed as her eyes f ell

on me who was now in an extremity . Come Shimmy she
, , ,
’
 I AM RE S C UE D FROM PASCO 47

said kindly dere is n otin gs to be feared now . Get up my

m
, ,

shil d . De wicked an is run away . ’

I opened my eyes an d looking up saw a gracious face

, , ,

bending over me with a smile on it that chased al l my fears

,

away . I m ade an attempt to ri se b ut the pain in my leg

,

overpowered me . The kind face faded out of my ken the ,

heath whirled round an d round a mist seemed to blind me

, ,

an d al l I can remembe r is giving a weak cry an d stretching

,

ou t my hands in su pplication for help an d then falling

,

prostrate at the feet ofthe Good Princess.

 C HA PTER IV

MY LADY KI N D AN D BOUNT I F UL
W H E N I came to my sen ses I was in a room an d a very ,

en tee l -d e st wom an applying something most p u ngent to

m
g y r

no stril s. I p ushed her h an d away an d endeavo u red to

y ,

ari se b ut she held me down gen tly .

m
,

Where a I P I asked an d where is D r. Pasco I

’
,
‘ ”

And then I heard a kind voice saying : Do not be

f , m
rightened Shi my . Lie still . Dere is n otin gs to f ear now . ’

It was the lady who had rescued me an d none other than

,

the Prin cess of Wales ! She was at thi s time a woman of

fo ur an d thi rty of considerable attractions. Her features
- -
,

were delicate an d agreeable especially her mouth very sm all

, ,

an d sensitive ; h er eyes bl u e an d capable ofgreat expression

m
, ,

now flashing with spirit now sparkling with merri ent as

, ,

the mood took her ; an d she had a brilliant complexion an d

a great ab u ndance oflight auburn hair. There was a com
l ete ab sen ce ofstateliness abo u t her an d she di splay ed an
p ,

unaf fected frank n ess an d freedom in the negligee of her

costume an d the abandon ofher m any habitual attitudes.
It was a joyful reliefto me to see her by the side ofmy
couch for although I had no suspicion of her quality I
, ,

recogn i sed the good angel who had descended as it might be

m
,

f rom the sk ,y an d p rotected me f ro Pas co . And with th at

experienced an instant sense ofsafety an d satisfaction .
Do you feel better Shimmy 1 she asked as I remained
,
”
,

silen tly staring at her.

 MY LAD Y KIND AN D BOUNTI F UL 49

I nodded my head but did not adventure to speak . ,

Y ou should an swer when yo ure spoke to whi spered the

’ ’
,

wom an whose n ame was Mrs. Sander.

, When Her R oyal
Highn ess asks how you are you should say I thank Your
m
, ,

Royal Highness I a better.

”
,

Dere dere Sander don t vorryde poor shil d . He do not

, , ,
’

know better. Are youin pain Shimmy ,

My leg h urts I said. ,

’

H él as ! I f ear it is broke. But we hafsend for de surgeon ,

an d he vill mend it an d ouvill soon be vell .

’

y ,

Will he hurt me I asked an d began to whimper. ,

Fie for shame she said . Y ou must n ot cry before

,

ouare h u rt Shimmy . Dat is like de leetle coward . I v nt

m
y , a

yo u to be braf e. Den I sall give you so etin kd at vill m ake

ouh appy .
’

y
She looked at me an d smiled an d nodded her head so ,

encouragingly that she conj ured my fears away .

Dere d at is better. Lie ver still Shimmy an d den you
,
’
, ,

vill not feel de pain . Are youhungry or tirsty P ’

I
’
m
damned hungry said I in the language that was ,

usual an d went f
, or nothing in the Select Co f fee House . ,

Mrs. Sander gave an exclam ation ofrebuke an d cl apped ,

her hand to my mouth . But the Princess b u rst into a hearty

laugh which astoni shed me who could see no reason for it.
, ,

Den you sall haf a d amned goot dinner Shimmy she ’

m
, ,

said, an d gave orders f or me to be served f ro her own .

And now Mary Wil son sall come an d attend to you an d
m
,

when Mr. E d ead es de apoticary do arrive I vill see d at he

, , ,

is gen tle an d do not hu rt youmore d an his leetle po ssible .

’

She lef t the room an d a minu te later a sto ut bustling

, ,

young woman came in an d took over charge of me from ,

Mrs. Sander who was the Princess s own dresser an d con fi ’

m
,

dential wom an . Mary proceeded to wash y hands an d

face an d m ake me a l ittle more presentable . She was a

m
,

good -hearted creature expressed great concern at my is ,

fortune an d was so kind an d homely in her manner that I

,

4
50 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
fo und tongue to speak , an d askher who the lady was that
had rescued me .
Why, l a ! tis H er Royal Highness the Prin cess ofWales,
’

who will be Q ueen ofEngl and some d ay. ’

Thi s unexpected piece ofinformation gave me a tremendous

shock . And for what reason , should you think ? Why ,
then , I assure you, because I was (as I believed ) the son ofa
rebel to the King , an d now brou ght into the very j aws of
danger. It was the King s soldiers f
’
rom whom I had been
resc ued by Pasco, an d again from the King s soldiers that I ‘

had fled thi s very d ay. An d here I was come into the power
ofthe Princess, who wo u ld be Queen !
I suppose my face disclosed my alarm , for Mary Wil son ,
observing it, an d mi sunderstanding the reas on, went on to
e
r ass r ue me.
There s no need to be frightened Jimmy. Sure you
’
, ,

won t fi n d a kinder mi stress in al l Kent n or one more

’

condescending. And you might live with her for a twelve

months an d a day an d n ever know she was aught but a pl ain
gen tlem an s lady . And youre a l ucky boy to come under
’ ’

her eye that you are for she s the charitab l est Princess that
’
, ,

e ver was. ’

An d when will she be Queen P ’

When ? Why when the King dies to be sure an d His

, , ,

R oyal Highness the Prince of Wales comes to the throne .

Unless he dies too an d then it will be thei r daughter the
, , ,

— —
little Pri n cess Charlotte God bless her who s in the Blue ’

Drawing-room n ow on a visit. She has asked to see you an d

, ,

Mi ss Garth has promised that she shall . ’

And will she be Q ueen too i I inquired in tones of

,
"

Why to be sure un less there s a son b

, , orn which i sn t at
’
,
’

al l likely ! She l l be Queen after H er Royal Highness.

’ ’

I was appalled to thus fi n d mysel fin what verily seemed

atmosphere ofQ u eens. It alm ost appeared to me I had
better have gone of f with Pasco than e nter th i s dangerous
52 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
vill hold your h d an , an d youm ust u
sq ee ze mine tight —ver
"

tight till it is al l over.

,
’

I think Your R oyal Highness I m ust have him on the

m
, ,

table said Mr. E d ead es.

’

m
,

—
Den get ready get read y answered the Princess i,
’

patiently . I vill soothe de shil d . Y ou m ust be quick

trés vite f— or d is is tort ure to him .
’

The preparation s were m ade an d I was lifted on to the

m
,

table by M ary Wil son an d Mr. E d ead es. And the former
held my head an d Mrs. San der my sound leg with the Prin ,

cess holding my hand s.

How long vill it l ast she asked .
Whi l st Your R oyal Highness can count twenty slowly . ’

She stooped down to me very tenderly an d there were ,

tears in her eyes as she saw the pain I was in an d heard my

sob s.

Be b raf e , m
Shi my my poor leetle shil d ! See I vill
, ,

—
count twenty no I vill only count fi fteen an d den it vill be
, ,

o ver al l de sooner. I vill hold your hand Shimmy an d you , ,

ll hold mine And now be b f — be brafe. ’

m
sa . ra e

She glanced up at Mr E d ead es an d nodded her head

.
,

an d began One an d I thou ght she was never going to say

Two . And then I felt the surgeon s fi n gers an d thumbs
’ ’

working at my broken bone an d the pain shot into it

,

excruci ating an d I caught my breath to scream . When there

,

came T wo from the lips of the Prince ss an d her gras p ,

tightened on mine an d seemed to speak to me with its touch

m
, ,

so fi r yet so supporting.
I turned my face to hers an d away from the surgeon s ’

m
,

whose ominous bending for had fascinated me till thi s

moment . Her blue eyes looked full into mine with a pity
in them that I drankin ; an d she cl utched me tighter an d
tighter as if she were waiting for the scream that was
,

breaking.
And there I cannot tell youhow it was but some subtle
h
,

in fluence seemed to pass fro m her to me for the scream was ,

 MY LA DY KI ND AN D BO UNTIFUL 53

t ngled in a gasp at its b

s ra i rth an d though I felt my head ,

an d body trembling violentl y with physical weakness no cry ,

escaped me .
I vow tis beyond me to explain the reason but the Princess
’
,

counted the full fi fteen an d by some miraculo us means or , ,

o wing to the singul ar power she possessed over me I ne ver ,

uttered a so und . So long as I looked into her eyes an d she

m
,

into mine my spi rit seemed sustained though y teeth

, ,

chattered an d my strength ooz ed from me like water in the

agony I had to end u

m
re . To thi s d ay tis incomp rehen sible to
’

e ; all I can do is tell ou tru ly wh t occ u ed When at

m
y a rr .

last the limb was set an d Mr. Ed ead es rose up an d called

,

for band ages an d I knew the operation was over I tried to

, ,

crown al l by giving a smile.

m
Dere Mr. E d ead es what do you tink of mine leetle
m
, ,

hero P as ked the Prin ce ss an d then her impul sive unaff

ected
’
, ,

way bent do wn an d gave me a ki ss.

Ay f or su re Mad am said M ary Wil son who had t u rned
’
, , , ,

very pale he bore it far better than I could have done I

, .

felt fi t to faint when I heard the bone snap . I f it had n t ’

been for Your Royal Highness I co uld never have stood an d

held him . And she fell backa pace or two with her hand to
’

m
,

her heart an d not at all fi r on her legs. Her weakness

,

seemed to af fect Mrs. Sander for she was looking for the ,

bandages like one daz ed .

Pho pho cried the Princess an d fetched the herself
, , m ,

an d su pported me with many a kind caressing pat as Mr.

m
,

E d ead es bou nd them ro und my l eg.

When al l was fi n ished he desi red me to be lifted on to the
,

couch again an d Mary an d Mrs. Sander came forward for

,

the p urpose ; but the Princess waved them back an d li fting ,

me in her arm s carried an d l aid me down.,

And now she said see vot I hafgot for you Shimmy
’ ’

m
, , , ,

An d drew out ofher pocket some co fi ts so delicious to look

m m
,

at that despite what I had gone thro u

, gh they ade my outh ,

water an d my eyes sparkle . Picking out the most tempting ,

54 THE Q UEEN CAN DO N O WRONG
she popped it into my mouth an d placed the rest in my hand .
,

Last of al l she produced a golden guinea an d held it up

, ,

before my eyes. Do youknow vot dat is ShimmyP ,

’

T is a guinea said I who had been sent ou t to change

’ ’
, ,

many at the Select Cof ee House .

f
Dat s my p resent to youfor being a brafe boy she said
’

,
’
,

an d gave it to me .

I did not know what to say to have thi s great su of , m

money gi ven me all for myself who had once tho ught mysel f ,

blessed by Heaven to have a crown . I held it in my hand ,

an d stared at this Lady Kind an d Bo u nti ful whose goodness ,

an d tenderness was beyond my comprehension . I was b ut an

uncouth little cub that had never b , een taught an d pe rhaps , , ,

had f ew occas ion s to u se the words thank you an d now I

cast about for word s to express y feelings an d could fi n d m ,

none.
Why what a rude ungrateful little boy youare not to
, ,

th nk u to H er R oy al Highness excl imed M y

m
sa a o a ar
y y
reproachf ully ; an d Mr. E d ead es who was standing looking ,

at me with a prof essional air frowned behind the Princess s ’

Bueven with this prompting it did not seem to me that

t
the mere word s suggested co uld suf lice. I felt I m ust do
something an d f or w ant of au ght better I put the guinea
m
, , ,

to y lips an d ki ssed it looking at the Princess al l the time

, ,

my heart too full to speak .

De dear leetle shi id she said an d stroked my forehead
,
’
,

tenderly d at does tank me so prettily

,
 THE PRIN C ESS OF WALES
V E LL , Shimmy , said the Prin cess
’
to me as soon as Mr.
m
Ed ead es had departed , leaving the inj unction that it wo uld
be necessary for me to keep my bed for a fo rtnight an d with a ,

little bleeding I sho uld not come to an y harm ve hafgot to ,

keep you yousee ! I do not tink you vill be ver sorry for
,
’

d at P Y ousal l be one of my l eetle charity boys d at I bring ,

up. But fi rst ofall youm ust tell me who youare an d who
m
,

vas you rf ader an d d at an who vas beating you

’

, .

My father is dead an d my mother is dead, an d my name

,

is Jimmy Rabbit an d Dr. Pasco is

,

Bu t here I broke of ffearing to get in a m uddle.

,

Who is d is Pasco
My master, I said an d he beats me an d says he will
’
, ,

m urder me. ’

He vill n efler beat youagain Shimmy so do not let d at

'

, ,

frighten you . And now who v as yo u rf ader P

’
,

My father is dead I repeated .,

’

Y es yes. Bu
,
—
t who vas he vot vas he P
’

At this in sistence there came to me an unreasoning f ear

that the Princess suspected he was a rebel . It compelled me
to make some declaration on the spur ofthe moment an d ,

f or want ofan ything better to answer I said he was a sailor

m an .

( I t was great opportunity missed through my childi sh

a
f
ear an d ignorance for I had but to mention my name an d ,

[ 55 ]
56 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
the incident of my kidnapping an d it would have led to a
revel ation that m u st h ave resto red me to my parents whil st

they were yet alive .)

And voul d youlike to be a sailor P asked the Princess. ’

That I wo uld said I eagerly.

,
’

V ell den you sall be von she p romi sed me smiling an d ’

m
, , , ,

nodding her head in con fi r ation . I haf sent many leetle

boy s into de service ofde King s Navy an d ven youhafbeen ’
,

school t I vill send ou

’

y .
At thi s my f ace fell .
I don t want to be schooled I decl ared who had heard
’
,

school was as b ad as a p ri son .

’
I want to go to sea.
B ut youare not big enou gh yet Shimmy . V y you are , ,

only a shil d . ’

I ve done pl enty ofwork I protested stoutly .

’

,
’

How old are youI she asked . ”

Having no knowledge ofmy age I adventured the assertion ,

I was fourteen.
Fourteen she cried an d gave one ofher hearty laughs.
,

V e vil l divide d at by h al f Shimmy an d den ve sall be more

, ,

near de m ark . So sayin g she caught one ofmy hand s in hers

’
, ,

an d circled my wri st with her f orefi n er an d thumb . Dese leetle

‘
g
bones voul d break did de vaves come over dem . Y oum ust grow
big an d strong before you can go to sea. An d learn to read ,

because I cannot hafde people say my charity boys d ey is

ignorant an d uncared for. An d ven youare big eno ugh I vil l
ask Captain Sir Sidney Smith or C aptain Hood to take ou
y .

Dey hafm any ofmy boys took . And yousall be a sailor like
your fader an d a credit to your King an d country . I a proud
,
m
of my charity boy s an d o u m u st m ake me p ro ud ofyou
y , ,

Shimmy . ’

She spoke without an y pride or af fectation an d so kindly ,

that I felt drawn to wards her more than I had to anyone in

my life even Sarah Well s. F or it was a complete new an d
,

strange thing to me to be ad dressed in thi s coaxing wa who

y ,

hardly knew what civility was or the sound ofa polite speech . ,
 THE PRI NCESS OF WA LE S 57

J ust then there came in Mrs. L ee who was a friend an d ,

companion to the Princess an d her daughter Winsome who , ,

stood by my co u ch -side .
V ot do you tink of my Kaninchen now asked the

Princess with a laugh . I s he not i provit P

, m ’

T is a sweet pretty child I do declare said Mrs. Lee

’ ’
, , , ,

looking at me critical ly with his black hair an d his violet

,

u
colo ed eye Q uite uncommon looking ! How are younow
-

m
r s. ,

my little an ? I s your leg painful

It vill soon be vell the Princess made answer for me .
,
’

(
And he is going to b e a goot boy an d learn how to read ,

an d write . And ven he is big enou gh he is going to be a

sail or.
’

All thi s time my eyes were fi xed on Win some L ee who was ,

standing a little b ehind her mother looking sympathetical ly

at me. She was a gi rl ofabo u t twelve years ofage tall an d ,

slight with beauti ful pal e -golden hair an d a lo velier face

, ,

than I had ever seen before . And when she smiled as she ,

now did at me it was like a glint ofspring sunshine. I sti l l

m
,

had in my hand some ofthe co fi ts the Princess had given

me an d I held them out to Winsome to take some . She
,

picked out one an d then to my amaz e stooped do wn an d

, , ,

gave me a kiss. T is a ki ss the memory of which I have

’

treasured through a long li fe .

Winny cried her mother reprovingly an d drew her back
,
’
, ,

what are you thinking of? Y ou don t know who the ’

child is. ’

I feel so sorry for the poor little boy she excused herself. ’

m
,

To think ofhow he was beaten by that wicked an

Do not scold her Harriet said the Princess ; it is de
, ,
’

tender heart an d I do love to see it. I do not tink de poor

,

shil d hafhad many ki sses in his li f e. ’

Your Highness s heart is al l susceptibility said Mrs. Lee .

’

,
’

I hope J immy will be grateful to you. I have not yet

gotten over the terror I felt when that an rushed at m
you?
58 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Y ou are too timid Harriet. But d at is de vay vid al l ,

y ou Engli sh l adies. In mine co unt ry it i s di f

fe rent . De re is

no youso brafe as a Brun swicker. She rose to her feet as ’

she spake an d drew hersel fu with a pride that fi tted her

, p
well. And I haf save leetle Shimmy an d put his master ,

to de ro ut vich do make me d o most b

, l eased . Goot-night ,

Shimmy she ad ded turning to me an d smiling. Sleep vell

’

m
, , ,

an d do not d ream of d at cru el an . H e vill n efi er come

'

back an y more an d yousall be happy here mit me.

,
’

She left the room accompanied by Mrs.Lee but Win some

,

lingered behind an d took the seat on my couch the Prin cess

,

had vacated .
T is time the child was let go to sleep Mi stress Winsome
’ ’
, ,

said Mary who had been standing by al l the time .

,

To sleep I cri ed ; b
‘
ut I never go to bed till the
morning. ’

L a then To hear a babe like you tal k I declare

"

, ,

Where have youbeen b ro ught up P ’

m
I a not a babe I protested indignantly who did not ,
’
,

reli sh bein g treated like one ; an d althou gh I had been awed

in the presence ofthe Princess had no min d to be so sub
mi ssive in humbler company . The truth was at this ti e
of my li f e I was very small an d p uny for my age which was
,

, m
,

bet ween ten an d eleven years though few would have guessed ,

more than eight . And ifyouwill have some description of ,

my personal appearan ce my hair was bl ack an d my eyes of a ,

—
bl ue colour a conj auction you sometimes fi n d in the Irish
race which I believe gave me a pleasing appearance ( tho u gh
m
, , ,

no longer exi sting I a told ) an d led to my being accounted

, ,

a sweet pretty child as the saying goes. I mention this cir

m
, ,

cu stan ce not f rom an

y v anity b u t bec au se I believe the ,

features an d appearan ce ofme brought me favour I co uld not

otherwi se have o b tained an d in chief measure contri b uted to
m
,

y ad v an cement.

He told Her Royal High ness he was f ourteen years old ,

’

said M ary l au ghing at the recoll ection .

,
60 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Y ou my be interested enough in al l this an d
a s r ue I was ,

gave great heed to what was the best way to win the
Princess s favour upon which everything depen ded .
’

F or said Win some if she chu ses she can et a boy

”

, g ,

m ade a midshipm an as she did Master Flinn who now carries

m
, ,

his dirk an d ay be a captain some d ay an d in comm and of

, ,

a f rigate or at least a b rig .

’
,
"
And was he a charity boy P I asked .
Y es. His f ather was a g u nner who had lost an ar in m
action an d the Princess got hi
, a pen si oner to the chest at m
Greenwich an d his son into the Navy. And ifyoubehave
,

well Jimmy I think she will do as m uch for you.

, ,
’

T is high time youwen t Mi stress Winsome said M ary

’ ’
, , ,

our converse . Here s a draught the surgeon ’

said J imm y was to take an d he m u st d rink it now an d go to

,

sleep .
’

I ll take no physic I declared .

’

,
’

’
Fie Jimmy said Winsome ; that s not behaving well .
,

I fthe Princess heard you

But bef ore she had fi n ished the sentence I sei z ed the glass
an d gu lped the medicine down .
That s a good boy said Winsome brightly as she patted
’

,
’
,

me on the head an d said good night. B ut did not of

- fer
to ki ss me again .
Left to myself(for M ary al so went of fto get her supper) ,

I had lei sure to consider ofal l the wonderful events which

h ad happened to me that d ay. Here was as co plete a m
change ofcircum stances out of Pasco s power as that which ’

carried me into it. I had woke that morning the Devil s ’

Shrimp ( as I rightly described mysel f) in the Select Cofi ee

'

House. I l ay down to sleep that night in the palace ofa

Princess an d under her protection ! What thi s was to mean
,

to me I did not ofcourse then realiz e n or for long long

, , , ,

af ter ; b ut I was shrewd enough to see somethin g of the

good fortune that had befallen me an d determined to profi t ,

by it.
 THE PRINCESS OF WALES 61

As f
or Pasco now that my mind was more composed my
, ,

fears dimin ished . There was the Hue an d Cryafter him an d ,

I kne w that was like to keep him in hidin g. N or could I

fo get the panic struck way in which he had d ecamped after
r -

he learnt it was the Princess ofWales he had shown rudeness

to . I was too ignorant to appreciate the exact quality of
the Prin cess whose title meant but a name to me saving
, ,

that she was the daughter of the King an d would be Q ueen

,

herself. I wondered ifPasco knew that an d would write an d

,

tell her I was the son ofa rebel. It struck a chill into my
m
heart to think of such a d en oun ce en t who knew Pasco to
m
,

be a an to stick at nothi n g.
Bu t presently comf ort came to my heart when I reflected
how kind the Princess had been to me an d her sm ile that
,

was in itself an assu ran ce of com fort . And how she had
rescu ed me from Pasco which was a thing no one in the
,

Select Cof fee House had dared do when his passion was
arou sed an d he cou
, ld be as ragin g as a Barbary lion . In
the wonder ofal l the sights I had seen al l the terrors expe
,

rien ced an d the vas t attention paid me ( who had never be f ore
m m
,

received notice f ro an y person of q u ality) my ind had

,

been too full to dwell upon that incident which it began to

,

do now when ( in the dark ) I fancied I saw again Pasco s

,
’

flushed an d bloated face advancing towards me an d the ,

Princess s incomparable b
’
ravery that met him with su ch
resol u tion an d prevailed over him .
I turned on my couch an d drew the clothes over my head ,

shu dderin g to think ofwhat might have been my fate but for
this vali ant Princess. And then came to me an appreciation
ofwhat she had done an d with it a f
, eelin g ofdevout gratitude
an d admiration . With which mental pictu re I f
ell as leep ,

to dream ofintermin able flights over house-roofs an d being ,

held over the di z z y edges of precipices an d mobs shoutin g

,

an d throwi n g stones an d weary trampi n g in the hot su

, n with ,

a greasy hand ro u nd my wri st an d the soldiers marching af t er

me an d p ursuit by Pasco who ( in my dreams) assumed the
, ,
62 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
f
o rm an pect ofa savage wil d beast an d being rescued
d as ,

from him by a wom an with auburn hai r an d a command

ing presence an d a speech that was complete new to me in
its pronunci ation b efore whom he had cowered an d sl unk
,

back.
I awoke next morning in a fever which had doubtl ess ,

kept me restless th rough the night an d occasioned my had

d reams. There was no getting up f or me an d I k ept my ,

bed al l d ay. A n um b er of people came to call at Montague

House it having been noised abroad that the Princess had
,

been assaulted by a ruf fi an on the heath yesterday an d these ,

were persons ofq uality an d others making inq uiries. Win

some when she had been sent f or assi stance by her mo ther

m
, ,

Mrs. Lee brough t b,

ack a an who carried me to the ho u
, se ,

an d when he was di smi ssed with a gu inea for his pains spent
, ,

m
it in a tavern where he soon got d runk an d gave a most
, ,

al ar i n g accou nt ofwhat he had seen an d gathered declaring ,

Her Roy al Highness had saved me f rom being m u rdered an d ,

beaten of ? my assailant with her own hands.

In con sequence there was a regular stream ofcallers an d
,

many people from London to fi n d out whether the Princess

was inj u red ( incl ud ing a spy from Carlton House who went ,

back di sappointed that she was not dead) to of fer thei r ,

congratulations on her escape . There came al so two , ,

ru nners from Bow Street who when they learn t the ruf
, , lian
was none other than Dr . Pasco were soon on his scent , ,

an d ef fected his capture at Woolwich where he had took ,

ref uge.
Bu t to return to Montagu e House where I had suddenly
,

become an obj ect of interest o wing to the Princess s rescue

,
’

of me so that du ring the w eekseveral persons came in to

view me out ofcuriosity an d a compliment ( as it were) to the

,

Princess. There were Sir John an d L ady Do uglas Sir Sidney ,

Smith ( the same who fought so n obly at Acre ) an d Captain ,

Hood who was afterwards the Admiral ofthat name . Also

,

many others off ashion . I can tell you a great to- do was
 T HE PR INCESS OF WALES 63

made about me who was asked more question s that I could

,

answer especi ally abou t Dr . Pasco ( for by this time it was

m m
,

known the runners had caught hi an d a an has only to be

m
,

a cri in al to be in great esteem f or gapers) , an d there were

prodigious compliments paid to the Prin cess for her astound

ing spirit displayed in opposin g such an abandoned an d
desperate character.
An d what are you going to do with the brat Madam P ,
’

asked Lady Dou glas who at this time was the mos t oh
,

se u
q ious of al l the company to the Pri n cess tho ugh she ,

aft erwards tried to ef ect her ruin with outrageo us perj

f urifi ca
tion .
It is my intention to have him educated an d sent into His

Yo ur R oyal Highness knows best but I should feel ,

inclined to consider ofit before harbouring the boy . Have

oum ade inq u i ies concern ing him i
”

y r

H e is an orphan an d d at is en o ugh f
, or me said the ,
’

Princess. My poor leetle Shimmy he haf bee n il l -treate d

,

an d m ad e to vork too hard an d is d e most God less l ee tl e

,

ra c l d at e er oudid hear of
a B ut still — she pinched my

m
s .
v
y
cheek ve vill m ake a an of him . Captain Hood vot ,

tink youP V ill he m ake a good sailor

H e s a likely -looking l ad M ad am ifI
’

, ay j u
, m
dge by his
appearance ; an d an boy tha t ou condescend to protect is
y y
su re to do oucredit .
’

m
y
Dat is vot I have told Shimmy ; d at he ust take care
an d do me de credit .
’

H e will be an ungratef ul little wretch if he does not ,

af ter the ri sque Your Royal Highness took to save him said ,
’

Lady Douglas.
m
I a not un grateful I burst out hating thi s wom an by a
,
’
,

sort ofinstinct an d I than k H er R oyal Highness very m uch . ’

,

I t was the fi rst word I had spoke an d it seemed to please the

,

Princess vastly .
Dere she cried ; yousee vot a good leetle fellow he is.
64 THE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
m
And how hi improve in his manners ! Yesterday he did
tell me he was d amned hungry ven I askit him ifhe voul d
like m t g to eat. And to d ay it is I tank You
i - r R oyal

m m
s o e n

Highness. Oh ve sall ake a shen tl e an of Shimmy I

”
,

do see. ’

It was to Winsome Lee that I owed an y m anners I ight m

m
have con tracted . She had paid e several vi sits during the
week an d instructed me how I ought to add ress the Princess
, ,

even to suggesting when I next saw her I should use the very
words I did . Mary Wilson had al so instructed me an d ,

between the two ofthem I man aged to get some inkling of

proper behaviour. Not that the Princess was one to notice
an y d efi cien cy where no wan t of respect was intended f or ,

many ofher charity children were unaware ofher rank an d ,

her treatment ofthem was as unaf fected an d kind as it had

been towards me. She had a great natural love for chi l dren ,

being parted from her own daughter by the cruel decree of

the Prince of Wales who would only allow the Princess
m
,

Charlotte to visit her other once a week an d spend the

m
,

su mer holiday s with her when the Princess wen t to the sea

side . Thi s was a heavy af fliction to H er Ro yal Highness ,

whose maternal feelings were more strongly developed than

in most women .
I was con f ined to my couch f or m any day s under treatment
from Mr. E d m
ead es an d every morning an d af
, t ernoon the
Princess came to see me an d I was so fortunate as to secure
,

her increas ing f avou r. When thi s became generally apparent

everyone in Montague House from the ladies-in -waiting of
m
, ,

who there were two down to the l ackeys an d serving women

, ,

began to notice me ; an d the latter constantly came to see

Shimmy as I was call ed in imitation of the Princess s
,
’
,
’

pronunciati on of my name an d they ki ssed me beyond

,

endurance .
a
le a
le

And now it is necessary you should know some particulars

e ofthat persecuted woman Caroline ofBruns
ofthe early li f
 THE PRINCESS OF WA LES 65

wick Princess ofWales ifyouwould follow the story I have

, ,

to relate .
She was the only daughter ofthe Duke of Brun swick by
his wi f e the Princess Augusta who was a sister of His
, ,

Majesty Ki n g George the Third . Brought up in a Court

where gaiety an d gall antry ru led supreme an d the formal
,

etiq ue tte ofroyalty was entirely dispen sed with the Princess ,

Caroline was early introd uced into a li fe which was the rally
ing-point ofpleasure an d fashion . Here her character became
moulded on those bold an d ample lines which d i stingui shed
her in atter-lif e ; an d she acquired a freedom ofm anner an d
a di sregard f or conventionality that was of ten mi stook to her ,

detriment for a more serious departure from propriety an d

, ,

gave ri se to un favourable interpretations.

In 1794 her hand was demanded by Geo rge III. for his
son, th e Prin ce ofWales who had acqu
, i red the title ofthe
First Gen tlem an in E urope. The Prince was no party to the
match an d ( it was notorious) only consented thereto in order
,

to obtain a grant from Parliament to pay of fhis debts an d

the augmentati on ofhis income. H e had alread y contracted
a morganatic m arri age with a worthy lady who went by the

name of Mrs. Fitz herbert an d to who he was attached .

, m
There is in exi stence a letter wrote by him to the Princess of
Brun swick when the alliance was first proposed wherein he ,

warns her in plain if stilted words : I cannot love you; I

, ,

can not make you happy ; my heart has long ceased to be

f But the in fluen ce bro u
’
ree . ght to bear on Caroline was too
overwhelming to be withstood an d she yielded to it an d was
, ,

in the following year united to a Prince who had m ade no

secret ofhis intention to desert her at the earliest O or
pp

The m arriage took place at the Palace ofSt. James an d

m
,

ou a read how H i R oy al Highness approached the altar

y y s

in a state ofintoxication . And ifyouwould pry further into

the secrets ofthat melancholy ceremony an d its sequ el there ,

are the words ofthe Princess hersel f spoke m any years af ter.
5
66 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Jud ge what it is to hafa drunken husband on one s yeddin g ’

d ay an d von who p assed de greatest part ofhis bridal night

,

under de grate vere he f ell an d vere I left hi . I fan y one m

m
, ,

were to say to e d is minute V ill you pass your life over

”

again or be killed
,
I voul d chuse Death
— —
A daughter the Princess Ch lotte was born to this
a r

ill assorted union in Jan uary 1796 an d in the following

-
, ,

April the Prince who had virtually discarded his wife within
m
,

a month of thei r arriage anno u nced his inten tion of

,

def in itel y separating from her in a letter delivered to her

m
through Lord Chol ondeley . This hi storic comm uni cation ,

known to the society of that period as The Letter of

License announced his intention of going his way an d
,
’
,
’

invited his wife to go hers. There followed a period of

‘ ’

persecution . The notorious Frances Lad y Jersey was in , ,

favou r with the Prince an d her power u ,nbounded . She lived

at Carlton Hou se in the
q uality o fl ady -in -waiting to his wi f
e ,

an d in the most open an d of fen sive m anner ridiculed the

R oyal wi f e to the Royal husband . From a cold politeness
m
,

ofwhich the Prince ofWales was a pe rf ect aster his cond uct ,

toward s Caroline degenerated into st udied unkindness with ,

no opportunity l ost of wounding her. She was so insulted

under his roof that on one occasion every piece offurniture
was taken ou t ofthe room she dined in ex cept two shabby ,

chairs ; an d a pair of pearl bracelets given her by the Fi rst

Gentleman in E urope were dem an ded back in order that they
m
,

ight be bestowed on his mistress.

Dri ven from Carlton House the Princess went to live at ,

Charlto n a small village on the borders of Bl ackheath in

,

Kent in complete retirement an d in 1801 removed to

, ,

Montague House . D uring all those years she was a

neglected discarded wom an having incurred the hatred ofthe
m
, ,

Queen who as as s all minded as her son an d wielded a

w,
-
,

complete in flu en ce over the poor old King . H is Majesty had

a great natu ral affection for Caroline an d did what his weak , ,

kindly intellect permitted to ameliorate her lot but the ,

68 THE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
to rai se these child ren in to a rank superior to that in which
m
they are placed . In that rank I ean them to rem ain an d ,

become vi rtuous an d happy members ofsociety . The boys

are destin ed to become expert seamen an d the gi rl s skil f
, ul ,

sensible an d indu striou ho us wives.

e ”
s -
,

On very rare occasion s the Princess appeared at Cou rt b ut ,

only to meet with such studied of f

ensive treatment fro m the
Q ueen an d the Prince of Wales that she preferred to forego
her rights of rank rather than exerci se them under such
m
circu stances. H er society at Blackheath was restricted to
af ew personal f riend s who vi sited her an d one or two re sidents
,

in the l ocality . Debarred from the exalted circle of li fe to

which she belonged she endeavoured to ad apt hersel f to her
,

circumscribed lot an d to fi n d in a simpler state an d amid st

,

comparatively h u mble surroundings that happiness which had

been denied her as the second lady in the land by a husband
whose barefaced vice an d dissipation an d profligacy was the
scand al ofE u rope .

H er routine ofli f e was monotonous. She walked about in

the vicinity ofBlackheath unattended by anyone savin g her
ladies. She seldom went to the Opera or entered into an y of
the gaieties offashionable life. In the sum er she would m
spend a f ew week s at M argate So u
, thend or some other sea
,

side resort f or the b en efi t of her an d the little Princess s

’
,

health ; but for the rest of the year she was practically a
recl u se in the retreat she had selected an d only notoriou
, s

in the neighbourhood by the kindness of her deeds an d her

uncommon tenderness to young children which was indeed , , ,

the most pronounced feature in her character.

Such then was the Lady Kind an d Bountif
, ,
ul into whose ,

house I found entry by one ofthose queer twi sts ofFortun e s ’

Wheel which sen d s the ball of our life rolling hither an d

thither now dropping into this compartment only to skip
, ,

ou t an d drop into that until we are at leng th establi shed

,

fi n al l y in the one we are f ated to occ u py . With me as you ,

have seen an d shall further see the ball progressed with

, ,
 THE PR INCESS OF WALES 69

e cent ic
c r m —
otion s from the home wh erein I was born in
Irel and to the Select Cof fee House from the
m
,

House to the Palace ( such as it was ) of a F riu es an d from

,

there into many other strange situations until it found me

,

fi n al l y landed in the spot from when ce I had fi rst been set

-
a spinn ing .
 C H APTER VI

WI N S O M E L EE

AN D to resume my story where I b roke of

so f to fi t in a
picture whose details I did not learn till long years after the
time ofwhich I a writing. m
The inj ury to my leg con fi n ed me to my couch for three
m
weeks d uring which ti e I was frequently vi sited by the
,

Princess who continued to take the kindest an d most con

,

descend ing interest in me oftentimes assuming a seat by my

,

bed an d engaging in lively conversation . Three or four days

,

af ter I arrived at Montague Hou se I was su ppli ed with a

complete outfi t ofnew clothes an d the fi rst time I wore them
m
,

she was pleased to re ark upon my improved appearance an d ,

decl are she could not believe I was the son ofa person in so
humble a class ofli fe as I had stated vowing that I looked
m
,

like a leet l e shen tl e an . ’

Once she brought her daughter the Princess Charlotte (who,

lived at Shooter s Hill near b

’
, y unde r the care ofa governess
,

appointed by the Prince ofWales) to see me an d the little ,

Princess who was but six years old put me to much confusion
m m
, ,

by asking e several questions with such a sta mer in

her speech that I f fi cul t to co p rehend her. She
ound it d if
was a fi n e-grown child with a b rilli ant complexion lovely
m
, ,

hair an d extremely stout an d her mother seemed very

, ,

devoted to her.
The room I was lodged in was not in the house itsel f after ,

the first n ight which I passed in the housekee pers room for
,
’
,

70 l
 WINSOME LEE 71

I was transferred to what was called the R ound Tower which ,

stood in the garden an d wherein was a set ofroom s occasion

,

al ly inhabited by gu ests for the accommodation in Montague

,

House was narrow. Mary Wilson was ordered to sleep with

me but she had her own d uties to attend to during the d ay
, ,

an d I was in con sequ

, ence left a good deal al one. An d , ,

observing this an idea occurred to the Princess an d she pro

m
, ,

posed that to employ a portion ofmy time Mistress Winso e

, ,

Lee shoul d teach me my letters. The which the latter kindly

an d willingly agreed to do f or she was the only you ng person
,

in that house an d I think felt dul l an d was not sorry of the

, ,

distraction the tas k af forded her.

An d so on the t0p of my good f ortune came the pri vilege
of being in stru cted in the alphabet by this beautif ul young
lady who although but twelve years old possessed m any
, , ,

accompli shments wi th m anners mo st engagi n g an d a highly

, ,

agreeable di sposition . Her companion ship in the ci rcu m ,

stan ces altogether ou tweighed what I conceived to be the

'

m
,

hardship of l earning an d she invested y early lessons with

,

a charm which no su bseq uent ones ever possessed . At fi rst

she approached the task with a grave solemnity that
threatened to m ake it a most serious business for me ; but
this soon wore of f an d in three or f
,
our days she had thro wn
away her reserve an d had oud ropped in u on u ouwou ld
y, p s
y
never have suspected she was the teacher an d I the pupil .
m
Not that she o itted the duties she had undertaken but ,

instead ofgiving me a formal lesson she invented a sort of

fantastic game in which the letters of the alphabet stood f
, or

various persons or things an d were introd uced in the way of

,

conversation so that I quite hankered to m ake thei r acq uaint

,

ance ( al l except P which stood f or Pas co

,
’
an d q uickly
picked up their import an d literary val ue an d before the ,

week was out was beginning to read in one syllab

- le word s.
N or was it only my letters I was learnin g b ut also my
m
,

an ners. It is not perhaps f or me to say that I was q u

,
ick ,

an d a t to receive new imp ression s an d correct mysel fofb ad

p
72 THE Q UEEN CAN DO N O WRONG
one s acquired an d I would ce rtainly rather l ay the credit to
m
,

Winsome who ef fected what was called a transfor ation in me

,
‘ ’

by those who noted the progress I made in my behaviour. And

fi rst ofal l my l anguage which in an age when al l gentlemen
, , , ,

from the First do wnward s swore in society was still in excess

m
, ,

of custo an d out ofpolite fashion in its selection . And from

the mouth of such a child as I entirely obnoxious. That I
m
,

shocked Winso e freq uently with the coarseness ofmy speech

I make no doubt ; an d had she declared her inabili ty to have
anything to do with su ch a young cubas I she would have ,

been perfectly justifi ed . But she took a more compassionate

view of my conduct an d corrected me of it in a m anner so
,

decisive yet so wholly kind that for very desire to please her
, , ,

an d more still to avoid shocking her I addressed mysel f to

, , ,

a ref orm ation ofmy language an d my manners.

And so it came to pass that by the time I was able to
hobble about I had vastly improved in m any ways. In my
comportment towards the Princess I had learnt to be re
s ectf
p ul an d d uti u
f l an d indeed
, when
, I wa s told wh at was
,

proper made it my pleas ure to o b

, serve the c ustom s ; f
or there

was no one in the world f or whom apart from her station I , ,

f elt such a devotion an d admiration as for this Lad y Kind an d

Bounti f ul who had rescued me from Pasco an d to whom I ,

was beholden f or every b en efi t I en o ed .

jy She w a s to me a
—
Goddess a Providence who without an y supplication on my
, ,

part had extended to me her protection an d generosity as

m
, ,

Winso e did constantly indicate to me . F or the latter

was a gi rl shre wd beyond her years an d having noted the ,

favou r H er Highness was inclined to show me took care I ,

shou ld not forfeit it for want of being prompted how to

appreciate it.

N or were the lesson s she gave me on thi s point hard an d

fas t ones b ut rather suggestions an d reasonings that pene
, ,

trated the hide ofu ncouthness my bringing up had b

- egotten ,

an d led me to reflect u pon the dues ofgratitude . And the wild

weed that had struggled as best it might pushing in here
, , ,
 WINSOME LEE 73

protecting itself there an d presenting on ly thorns to the

,

stran ger an d the world when tran spl anted by a sweet an d

,

gen tle nature into kindly soil grew quickly into a better
plant a n d I venture to think developed early the buds ofa
, , ,

more useful promi se .

It was generally understood that as soon as I was recovered

ofmy hu rt I was to be boarded ou t as was the cu stom ofthe
,

Princess with her charity boys an d gi rls who were al l lodged ,

with respectable persons in the neighbourhood When there ,

fore I began to hobble ab

, out I was led to believe my residence
at Montagu e House would soon be terminated . The which
, m
gave me great concern an d ade me very sad for I had con ,

ceiv ed a mon strou s afi ection for Win some Lee an d she I

'

, ,

thin k some for me in that way which young girls af

,
fect
towards children whom they have charge over.
One d ay I was sent for by the Princess to at tend her in
what was known as The Turkish Tent Room which was a ,
”

cham b er fi tted up in the E as tern fashion with arab esques ,

an d O rien tal carpets an d cushions. When I arrived there I

found her seated on the floor by the side of an open window
that looked on the garden with Winsome Lee reading a book
,

to her.
Shimmy she said I hear from V in so e d at you haf
,
”
,
m
made great progress in your studies an d I hafsent for youto
,

see how m u ch youhaflearn . ’

Whereupon I drew mysel fup erect with my hands behind ,

my back (as Winsome had instructed me who eviden tly h ar ,

boured some expectation that the Princess might take it into

m
her head to exa ine my attainments) an d prepared myselfto
do credit to my teacher. With the alphabet I was pat an d ,

I spelled several easy word s correct an d acquitted mysel f in

,

a way that gave pleasu re to my little Mist ress as I co uld see ,

by the expression on her face . An d in the end Her R oyal

Highness expressed surprise at my progress.
V y now you have done dat f amou she decl ared an d
’
, , sly , ,
74 T HE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
looked at me in ten tly an d then asked : V en voul d you like
,

to go to school Shimmy P ,
’

I mad e no answer b ut looked toward s Wi n some with a

,

feeling in my heart I had much rather stay an d be taught

by her.
The Princess glan ced at her too an d I think some ink , ,

li n g of my feeli n gs was conveyed to her for she did not ,

repeat the q u estion but turn ing her eyes to me again

, , ,

observed :
Y oudo look ver pale Shim y. I tink youhafbeen sh u
’
, mt
up too m uch in d at room . I tell youvot yousall come vid
m
,

me to Margate vere I a going next veek an d den yousall

, ,

g o to school ven ve retur n .

’

At thi s I experien ced the greatest f eeli n g ofdelight for ,

Win some who had been to the seaside with the Princess the
,

previous year had af , forded me a full description of her

holiday there . I expressed my than ks in the best l ang uage
I was capable of an d when the Princess held out one ofher
,

hand s to me knelt down on one knee an d kissed it as gall antly

,

y ou might wi sh .

And vere hafyou learn dese f ine m anners Kanin chen i ”

,

ked Her Highness laughing . ,

Mistress Winsome taught me Mad am said I . , ,

’

V y den I must congratul ate you my dear on having

, , , ,

civiliz ed d is leetle savage so soon . ’

J immy is a very good boy said Winsome an d minds ,

’
,
‘

what is said to him . He has given me no trouble. ’

An d you said the Princess drawing Winsome toward s

,
’
,

her an d giving her a kiss are a ver goot gi rl to take so ,

’

m uch trouble vid mine leetle wai f. I hope you vill always
be kind to de shil d ren ofde poor as youhafbeen to heem . ’

Thus it happe ned I was retained in the Princess s house ’

hold for a further period an d accompanied her to the seaside

, ,

where I was appointed a sort ofpage to the Princess Charlotte ,

to am use her in her play an d carry her toy things when she
,

was ab road . The which was nearly al l d aylong f or the place ,

76 T HE Q UEEN C AN D O NO WRON G
that was learnt was my age which he declared to be eleven
m
,

years. But that m uch Mr.Ed ead es had al ready laid down ,

having guessed it aright by the form ation ofmy teeth the ,

same as
y o u do with hor ses a n d sheep .

Shortly af ter the Prin cess return ed to Blac kheath to take

up her residence f or the winter an d within a f ortnight ofher ,

arrival there came a visitor to the hou

, se who soon en j oyed ,

a great intimacy with her. I will call him Captain Monday .

She had met him at Raynham an d he was now appointed

m
m
,

to the command ofthe F e ug ht fi ttin g up at Deptford an d , ,

in order to be near his ship he engaged lod gings at Blackheath .

I think it was his thi rd or fourth visit that I was sent for
to the Bl ue Room which was the chiefdrawin g room . Ou
-
,
-
my arrival there the Princess called me to her side an d
m
, ,

l aying a ha nd on each of my shoulders pushed e forward ,

by way ofintroducing me.

D is is de leetle boy she said an d I h 0 pe
’
,
my dear , ,

Captain Monday you vill be so obliging as to promise to

m
,

take de protection ofhi ven he is grown up. ’

I looked up an d saw a fi n e-drest of

, ficer standing in f ront
of me with his hat in his hand evidently abou t to depart
m
, ,

an d his scabbard u nder his ar . He was wearing a Naval

uni f orm with a pigtail an d cocked hat an d had a hearty
, ,

manner about him which whil st it frightened me a little

, ,

( owing to the lo udn ess of his voice ) w as wholly captivating . ,

Be sure Madam said he

, I shal l have great pleasure
,
’
,

in undertaking the charge of an y protegé ofYour R oyal ’

Highness. Then he looked me up an d down critica l ly an d

’
,

delivere d his opinion . A bright smart l ad he said who , ,

’
,

only wants to be a little bigger to make as clean a boy as I

cou ld wish to have aboard the F earn oug ht. ’

D is is Captain Monday said the Princess to me who ,

’
,

hafpromise to take sharge ofyou Shimmy. V en yougo to

m
,

sea I do mean . He is a ver goot kin d shen tl e an an d

’
u
m
, yo , ,

m ust tan k him for his p ro i se . ’

Thank you sir said I an d gave a tug at my forelock

, ,
’
, ,
 WINSOME L EE 77

which was a little trick I had learnt f

rom the longshore men

And when shal l you send him Madam asked Captain ,

Monday answering my sal ute.

,

So soon as he hafhad some schooling an d can read an d ,

write an d is grow a better si z e to stand de hardships ofde

,

seafaring lif e. ’

Thi s is the boy whom yourescued on the heath I think . ,

’

Y ah. And d at is de reason I do take de particular interest

in heem . An d besides dat he is von v er goot an d obedient
’

m
,

boy an d youI vas at Margate I did make hi page to my

,

leetle daughter. I haf great hopes Shimmy vill grow into a

m
goot an an d ifhe is as d iligent an d obedient mit youas he
,

has been vid me you sall fi n d him a boy be tter dan an y of

,

mine oders. ’

I hope youwill deserve the character H er R oyal H ighn ess

is gi ving you said Captain Mond ay .
’
,

Thank you sir I said an d tugged my forelock .

, ,
’
,

And wit h that an d a prodigio us bow to the Princess an d

m
, ,

a most ce re oniou s ki ss bestowed on her hand he de arted

p
m
m
, ,

being timed to visit the F ear g ht that afternoon .

I was j ust on the point of leaving the room when there ,

came a sound of rustling sil k an d who sho uld enter but ,

Lad y Douglas . The Princess was very elated in her spirits ,

an d seemed glad to see this f al se f

riend with whom at that

m
,

time she was on term s of the closest inti acy altho ugh ,

Lad y Douglas was nothing more or less than a Carlt on

House spy or what was worse a woman who subsequently
, , ,

betrayed Her Royal Highness to the Prince of Wales

for a price the amount of which was never m ade public .
m
,

Outhi s occasion she et her with great ef usion an d the two

f ,

of them blocked u p the doo rway so th at there was no ,

chan ce for me to retire from the room . F or it would ,

appear the Princess had something to tell Lady Dou

, glas
which she was dying to relate .
Oh my dear she cried I hafso etin g most curious to
, , m
78 TH E Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
tell yo u. I vent out to -d ay vid Miss Garth ( this was one
of her ladies in waiting )
- - to Mr. An gerstein s who as you ’
, ,

do know is ver ill . I vent out de back vay from de garden

,
’
,

tro Green vich Park so d at nobody shou

’
, ld know me. V ell ,

my dear I vas followed by t wo gipsies who did in sist on

, ,

te llin g my f ort une . I no money haf said I . But dey ,

”

persisted in following me an d did so till I come to Mr. ,

Angerstei n s gate . Den I tell dem d at if dey v il l yait dere ,

dey sall tell my fortune ven I d o come out. I did fi n d dem

on my return an d vat do youtink dey told me i ( Here the
,
”

Princess rolled her eyes with that quick penetrating glance ,

of hers that seemed to examine al l the fold s of one s ’

thoughts at the same momen t.) V y d ey told me d at I

m
,

vos a married vo an but d at I sho uld not b

, e married long ,

an d d at my heart it vos to be a f oreigner s an d dat I should ’

m
,

n I loved an d b
’

g o a b road an d dere m arry de

, a e ver rich ,

an d happy ! Dey did tell me ao by God — an d how cou ld ,

dey know al l dat i ”

T is very strange indeed m ad am said In d y Dou glas

‘ ’
, , ,

with her deceitful eyes elevated to the ceilin g as though she ,

was trying to peer i n to f uturity b ut they make up m any

—
curious an d nonsensical tales that 18 their trad e
"
Twas yer odd said the Princess looking sign ifi can tl y at
”
,
’
,

Lady Douglas as though they had a secret b

, etween them .
V os it not odd
V ery odd coincided Lady Dou
’
, glas. And then catchi n g a ,

sight of me Bu,t hush You r Highness ! we have a littl e

, ,

imp listen ing an d I do perceive his ears are as long as

,

The Princess glanced round.

Ru n away Shimmy said she
, an d go an d ,
’
, fi n d V in so m
e,

an d get her to gifyoua lesson in de Engl i sh .

’

Some little time later the Princess caused inquiries to be

made for a place for me to be boarded out. There were

many people who we re an xious to take charge ofher charity
 WINSOME LEE 79

boys an d girls but Her Royal Highness designed a special

,

favou r for me . An d in stead of sending me to some sm all

trad esmen as were the others asked Mr. Ed ead es the

, , m ,

apothecary to receive me into his family . The which he

,

con sented to do . He lived at Greenwich in a house close ,

to the river with his wi fe an d a daughter an d two son s

, ,

whom he was rearing to his own profes sion . There was a

school at Greenwich kept by a Mr. Lu ci us Curti s at which
m
, ,

I was entered as a superior p upil— not in ability you ay be ,

sure b
, ut to be treated better than the comm on alty an d ,

cuo
jy the ben efi ts of speci al lesson s.

I need scarce say it was great sorrow to e to part from

Winsome Lee an d she herselfshowed considerable regret
m
,

at my de partu re . Bu t as she assu

, red me it was f or my
,

good an d advised me to apply mysel f diligently to my

,

stu dies so as to fi t mysel ffor a better station in li fe than

,

the one held out to Her R oyal Highness s charity boys. ’

Once a week I was permitted to go to Montague House to

spend a holiday af ternoon . At fi rst it was decided that
I should go on the same d ay as the other charity boys who , m
the Princess out ofthe kindness ofher heart was accustomed
to en te rtain but after the second time she gave orders that
I should attend on a S unday instead an d never failed to take
,

notice of me an d as k me how I was gettin g ou. An d in

the absence ofan y other companions I used to spend those
Sunday afternoons with Winsome sometimes accompanying
,

her to church or ifthe weather was fi n e f

, , or a walk on
,

the heath .
And here I must mention an incident that happened some
time after I was sen t to Mr. C urti s s Academy partly because
’
,

it ill ustrates the fond disposition of the Princess partl y ,

because ofthe grave conseq uences to which it led.

Her R oyal Highness adopted the inf ant son of a l abou rer ,

working at the Arsenal at Wool wich to bring up as her own .

,

It was an imprudent an d inj udicious thing to do an d was ,

sei z e d on by her enemies to tr an d ef fect h er ruin And yet

y .
80 THE Q UEEN CA N DO NO WR ONG
it was but the overpowering maternal impul se she could not
resi st which in her cru
, , el situation compelled her to seek ,

in ad opted children that interest an d those outlets for her

longings deni ed her in her own proper li fe . I who ex ,

p erien ced h er tende r kindne ss can understand in s

,ome
d egree the f eelings that prompted her in the matter. She
was a wom an with m any f au lts in her conduct but she had a ,

peculiar love for little child ren an d a strange power to m ake

,

them love her. I thi n k she might have borne a score an d ,

found room in her heart for al l an d never im agined she had

,

on e too m any .

I remember well the arrival of little Willie Austin or ,

Wil l ikin s as he came to be called for the Princess showed

,
’
,

him to me one S unday soon after I had been sent to school ,

an d asked me what I tho u ght ofher new little boy .

I do not know what it was but as I gaz ed down upon the
m
,

smal l th ing lying in her ar s there came over me a d es er

, p fi te

feeling ofj ealousy . She had ever been so kind to me in

those odd moments when she had graciously noticed me an d ,

—
now well I saw her aflection centred on thi s new child
,
'

that was only a wailing babe but had entered the ho use that
,

I had left an d was every thing there .

,

I had no answer to give her but I suppose there was a ,

wi stful look in my eyes as I gl anced up f rom the child to her.

—
An d then I recall it now more th an hal fa century since
,

the words were spoke—al l ofa sudden she slipped one ofher
hand s from under the infant an d fondl ing my cheek with
, ,

a tou

m
ch that was caressing said ,

Ah Shi my I could not help it. I m ust hafa leetle

, ,

bab e to love . Bu t I sall not cease to love y ou Shimmy ; f or ,

I do tink youare a dear leetle boy an d I vill al vays be kind ,

to you my shil d .
,
’

I caught her hand in mine an d kissed it an d then the ,

babe s hand an d ki ssed that . And thereaf

’
ter I was bound
in ties closer than ever before to My Lady Kind an d
Bounti ful .
 C HAP TER VII

T HE LI FE FOR ME

m
I ST AY E D with Mr. E d ead es an d attended Mr. Curti s s
,
’

Academy for a year an d a half. My schoolmates included

m
two of Mr. E d ead es son s who were both about my own
’

m
,

But the ember of the family I liked most was his

m
ag e.

daughter Emily E d ead es a gi rl j ust about Winsome s age

,
’

with brown eyes an d a perpetual smile ofgayness that m ust

have attracted anyone . We were great friends although I ,

did not speak of her to Winsome after one — the fi rst

occasion or to express it in a way less remini scent of my
, ,

nationality I only spoke ofher once an d then not agai n .

, ,

But there ! I still rem ain uncon sciously Irish in the f raming
ofmy speech .

D uring these eighteen months at school I devoted mysel f

diligently to my studies learnt to read an d write an d do
,

sum s an d acquired some knowledge ofGe ography an d History .

,

When I began to apply mysel fto the latter task I became ,

more particularly acquai n ted with the nature ofrebels an d ,

the punishment meted out to them an d their families in

the past. From which I d rew deductions as to the present for
my own guidance an d the knowledge thus gained con fir ed
, m
me in my determination to preserve the secrecy ofmy parent
age with the most scru pulo us care an d never to reveal so
m
,

uch ofmy real name as I was acquainted with .

Mr. Curti s was very proud ofme an d seldom f ailed to int ro
,

duce me to an y vi sitor to the school as the little boy whom

[ 31 ] 6
82 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
Her R oyal Highness the Princess ofWales (God bless her
saved f
rom the Highwaymen for the original story was soon
am p l ifi ed an d deco rated with detail s that lent it additional

romance an d fi re . Moreover I was a good recommend ation to

,

his Acad emy f , or he was ordered to send the P rincess a R eport

on my Progress once a q uarter an d used to keep a copy of ,

thi s (in process ofcomposition) in a d rawer at his elbow an d ,

constantly take occasion to anno unce that he was j ust

d rafting his Report for H er Royal Highness whene ver an y
parent called with a view to entering his son at the Acad emy .
Thi s was rather painful for me who was led to believe ,

mysel falways more or less engaging Mr. Curti s s exclusive ’

attention ; b ut it had the ef f

ect ofstirring me on to speci al
end eavour so that I might not disappoint the Princess. Not
withstanding I never heard an ything more about the Reports
,

afl er they had once sallied f orth from Mr. Curtis s incubation ’

ofthem .

I fthe Princess s observation ofme during thi s peri od grew

’

to be rather fi tful it ever remained kind when I was brought

,

under her n oti ce . She was m uch taken up with the child
William Austin she had adopted an d her charity boys ,

su f
f ered in consequence but I perhaps less than an y other.
, , ,

The circumstance which brought me un der her protection

secu re d me a pecu liar place in her favour an d I was alway s ,

my leetle Shimmy to her spoke with a singul ar expression

,

ofaf f ectionate patronage.

I think too that Winsome helped to keep me warm in her
m
, ,

me ory for she an d her mother rem ained members ofthe

,

Princess s house an d were always of the company at her

’
,

table. When I went to spend my S undays at Montague

House I dined with Monsieur Sicard the house steward an d , ,

Mrs. Sander the Princess s dresser in the housekeeper s’ ’

m
, ,

roo ; an d they too who

, wer
,e both m uch favou red an d

esteemed by Her Highness treated me with great i n dulgence .

m
,

Indeed I ay say I had m any f

, riend s at Mo n tag ue House
who had a good word to put in for me the general belief ,
84 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
in school one morning in Jun e when I saw Krackel er one of ,

the lackeys in Her Highness s service enter the room an d ’

,

deliver a letter to Mr. Curtis who having read it bade me

, , ,

stand u a n d then with some ce remony in f o rmed me I was

p , , ,

req u i red to attend the Princess immediately .

I have an idea Master Rabbit said he that it is
, ,
’
,

intended you should go to sea for tis wrote there is no ,

’

occasion to carry an y clothes with you as a uni form will have

m
,

to be provided . I a sorry to lose so promising a pupil at

su ch sudd en notice an d although it is no occasion for
,

f estivity I feel I should be wanting in respect to Her R oyal

,

Highness the Princess ofWales ( our future Q ueen) did I not ,

signali z e the honou r she hath con f

erred on my Acade my in
m m
tran slating my ost pro isin g pupil ( as Her Highness m ust
k n ow by the m an y Re ports it hath been my d uty an d
pleasure to submit to her) to the Service ofthe State in the
N avy of His M ajesty the King (God bless him an d
Here he lost the thread of his di scourse an d wound up ,

hil ariously : So stap my vital s but I prom ulgate a General

, ,

Holiday
m
At thi s there was a using chee r an d then Mr.C u rti s held ,

up his hand to call silence an d proposed Three cheers for

,

the King ( God bless him ) The which were gi ven with fer
vour. And then Three cheers for the Princess of Wal es
( God ble ss h er ) Th e w hich were given with z eal . And
l as tly T hree cheers for Jimmy Rabbit The which ( I blush
,

to say it) were given with enthusias m . And with that the
school was let o
g .

Bu t not be f ore these dear schoolmates ofmine had crowded

rou nd me an d one gi ven me his best alley -taw ; an d another
,

a kni f e whereof I knew him to be especially fond ; an d a

,

third the piece of cake he had been saving up for a rich

piece this three days past an d tantaliz ing us with a peep of
,

it (thou gh it d id seem to me to grow un common d ryd urin g that

probationary peri od ) an d a fourth a penny which was al l
m
,

the on ey he had in the world his mother being a widow , ,

 THE LIFE F OR ME 85

an d her husband in an asyl um ; an d a fi fth But there I ,

catalogue no more ; they were al l my dear school m ates ,

an d my h e ar t did t ruly grieve to say good -bye to them .

All thi s while Mr. Curti s looked on at the spontaneous

demon stration with some impatience an d when it was fi n ished ,

pre sented me with his blessin g an d consigned me to Krackel er s ’

care . An d so to the town to show all the inhabitants the

letter he had received wrote by Her Highn ess with her own
,

—
hand his impatience to do which was I make no doubt at , ,

the bottom ofthe holiday he had granted .

Krack el er had a chai se waiting o u tside an d we went home
m
,

to get my bag an d say good bye to Mr. Ed ead es who was

-

m
,

ou t; b ut Mrs. E d ead es a very worthy wom an ki ssed me

, ,

an d so did Emily an d cried f

, earing I should get drowned at
,

sea. The which was fooli shness as I told her ; yet ki ssed her
,

back though I never told Winsome of it at that time but

, ,

confessed several years after an d even then got soun d l y rated

,

for doing su ch an od ious thing. ’

m
From Mr. Ed ead es we d rove to London where we got
’
,

passage in a hgygoing to Margate to call at Southend on the ,

way. The f ootman was a good respectable fellow an d truly

, ,

devoted to the Princess being one ofher own engagin g. H e

,

told me the F ean wug ht had j ust arrived with Captain

Monday an d was an chored of
, fthe Nore an d he believed I was ,

to be sent aboard her. And he bought me a b ofnu t to

m
a
g s ,

he ate as a diversion d ropping down the river f ro his own

m m
,

oney which I dee med a very genero us thin g ofhi to d o.

,

The Princess occupied two houses adjoin in g one another , ,

on the Cl i f fat Southend f rom which a shru

, bbery ran down
to the strand close to which we l anded . Mrs. L ee an d Win
,

some chanced to be there to meet me an d al so Miss H ammond , ,

who was one ofthe Princess s ladies-in -waiting . And so soon

’

as we f etched the shore Winsome came running do wn to greet

me accompanied by a boy somewhat older than myself.
,

Oh Shimmy she cried in great glee . Y ouare to go to sea

m
,

as a mid shipm an an d yo uwill wear a d i rk an d u

, nifor an d ,
86 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
have men under you to command. Thi s is Master Flinn ,

who is a midshipman on the F earnou g ht an d will be you r ,

’
shipm ate .

F linn who was a tall red headed l ad pu

,
- t his hand ou t an d , ,

I shook it. He looked very fi n e with his bl ue coat an d gilt

buttons his dirk an d cutlass an d his hai r done in a small
, ,

pig tail . But his m an ner to me was rather condescending.

-

As we walked up the clif -

fside I noticed he paid great atten
tion to Winso me who seemed vastly satisfied at his politeness
, ,

especi ally when he called her Miss L ee which was never ,

’

done by anyone else an d quite a new -f angled phrase t hat l efl:

Mistress Winsome far behind .
,

When we reached the house he would not come in but ,

took up his stand outside declaring he was on d o ty an d only

, ,

left it to escort Winsome to the beach which fell within its ,

execution . And then he took up his post with his hand on

m
,

his di rk an d an importance about hi

, that impressed me
with the greatest respect.
Captain Monday was having a dish oftea with the Princess ,

an d when my arrival was anno u nced I was sent for to the ,

d wi g room . Mrs. Lee an d Miss Hammond were in the

ra n -
room . As soon as I entered I m ade my bow fi rst to Her ,

Highness an d then to the company an d stood by the door.

, ,

Come here Shimmy said the Princess beckoning me

’

m
, , ,

towards her ; an d caught me by the ar an d held me so that

Captain Monday might take an observation ofme . How
big you do grow Shimmy she went on to rem ark as she
, ,

noted I was now taller than hersel f as she was seated . Ven
y oufi rst came
yo u vas no big erd an d at
g (s he held her hand
at a level with her own head ) an d now I do decl are you
m
,

m ust b e as taller as V in so e. Dis is my leetle protege

’

Shimmy Rabbit v ot I did introd uce to you de year be fore

,

last C aptain Monday she explain ed ad d ressing herself to

’

m
, , ,

him only he is not so leetle as I did tink for. I a anxious

,

to see him establish in li fe an d I know dere is no one can do

,

more for a boy dan my goot f riend Captain Mond ay .

’
 THE LIFE F OR ME 87

I shall be proud Mad am to take charge of Jim y m

m
, ,

Rabbit an d do what I can f

, or hi . And ifhe is like the

other lad s Your Highness has sent me he can not fail to get
on well . ’

I do not account Shimmy one ofmy charity boy s said the ,

’

Princess. Dey are ver go t boy

o s but d s von vell I did him
i — ’
, ,

rescu e fro m a cruel tyrant . And so dey calls him ( I hear) d e

P fl n cess qfVal es leetle b an d so I haf breed him u f
’ ”

m
oy p or ,

a leetle shen tl e an which I tink he is.

’
,

At that kindly an d gracio u s speech I f elt my bosom swell

with pride an d there came a flush into my face. An d not
,

knowing what else to do I put my hand up to my forelock in ,

a naval sal u te an d stood erect .

m
,

We shall certainly m ake a an ofhim Madam predicted , ,

’

Captain Monday returning my sal ute for I can see he is a

, ,

mart in te lligent l ad . What might his age he

,

How old are you Shimmy asked the Princess.

m m
,

Mr Ed ead es says I a twelve M ad am . ’

m
. ,

Ach yes ! I remember. He did tell Shim y s age by his

,
’

teet cried the Princess laughing at the recollection . And ,

Shimmy s fader was a sailor.

’ ’

A sailor eh ? In what ship did he serve an d in what

, ,

capacity as ked Captain Monday .

I don t k now sir was al l I could answer.
’ ’

m
, ,

How did you come to l ive vid d at an who vas yo ur

master P asked the Princess.
’

I always lived with hi Mad am said I avoiding the m , ,

’
,

question from the same old fear ofdi sclosing I was a rebel s ’

son, an d to be con si stent with the an swe rs I had m ade

previously .
I yonder observed the Princess shrewdly vedder youvas
, ,

kid n apped Shimmy ,

This put me in a great perturbation who strangely , ,

enough had never harbo ured such a suspicion being per

, ,

suad ed that I had f al len into Pasco 8 hands in the nat u ral

order ofthings an d to be rescued fro the soldiers. Even

, m
 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
now it did not strike me as a solution but rather increased ,

my fear lest I should be forced into a d isclosure. F or that I

really was a rebe l s son was an accepted beliefwith me an d
’

there is nothi n g more d if fi cul t than that to eradicate .

What m akes you say that Mad am i asked C aptain ,
"

Monday .
His master vas a great villain an d tran sported to Botany
,

Bay f or kidn apping a respectable tradesm an . And ifhe did

do d at vy not kidnap Shimmy ? Shimmy is not like my
,

oder charity boys mit deir pudd ing faces ven dey gets fat.
,

D at is de vay in de common cl asses. See ! is he not a pretty

y oung shen tl e ans? m
B ut oh Shimmy Shimmy
, s he con , ,
’

tin ued l au
, ghing an d shaking her forefi n ger at me youvas ,

a Godl ess leetle devil ven you did fi rst come to me ! But
dere — she broke of f as she saw my f ace f all an d mysel f ,

in con f usion I d id not mean to h urt your feelings Shimmy . ,

And I vow an d decl are by Gott youare de best ofal l de leetle

boys I haftake de charge ofupon mysel f. ’

Which brought the smile to my face an d my hand to the ,

sal ute again .

And then she went on to arrange in a general way for my
ou tfi t which Captain Monday undertook to procu re an d to
m
, ,

give hi sundry orders about me an d in short showed a , , ,

conti n uance of that patroni z ing interest she had always

evinced an d never more so than now when I was about to
, ,

—
enter on a sailor s li fe the li fe for me !
’

It was deci d ed that I sho uld j oin the F earn ag ht the next m
morning for she was only d ue to stop three or four days
, ,

being ordered to join Lord Nelson s flee t at Toulon that was ’

watching the French since the Decl arat ion ofWar.

Being presently dismi ssed I went downstai rs an d stole out
,

to have a peep at Flinn again whose uniform an d arms had a

m
,

l ete fascin ation f or me.

p
H e look ed at me rather superci l iously an d asked me what ,

my name was an d I told him Jimmy Rabbit.

,
’

Rabbit eh said he ; mind then boy an d see yo ure no

‘ ’
, , , ,
 THE LIFE FOR ME 89

lop-sided one ifyoure going to j oin the F ig htin g F ean wug ht.
’

Are youone ofthe Princess s boys

’

Y es said I
,
’
only I not one ofher charity boys.
,
m
’ ’

No ? What are youthen

’
mI better than the charity boys I explained ; I ve been ,
’ ’

bred up a gentleman . ’

Oh youhave have you said he. Bred up a gentleman

m m
, ,

We shall have to min d our manners in the id ship en s ’

mess. Because d ye see I was only of her charity boys

,
’

myself. ’

An d how did youget m ad e a midshipman I asked .

F or my merits Mr. Rabbit . An d there s some mid ship
’
,

men what get m ad e ship s boys for thei r merits. l is al l in ”

’ '

the Captain s hand s. I hope your merits are equal to your

’

manners. ’

I hope they are I answered modestly . ,

’

There s on e great merit said he that s the very best of

’
,
’
,
’

al l . And that s money . H ave you an y money Mr. Gentle

’

m m
,

an Jim y Rabbit P
’

I told him none except the penny Ben Trot had given ,

me .
Well the Pri n cess will give youa guinea before youcome
m
,

on board that bein g her custo with her boys. And I ll

,
’

bespeak hal fofit as a loan . ’

Why should I lend youhalfa guinea P I protested . ’

To show your good m an ners. T is com rad eship an d sur ’

passing polite manners to lend money in the King s Navy ; ’

an d to deny it when youve got it is a wa we don t app rove

’ ’
, y ,

of An d I ve known young gentlemen who ref used it to

’
. , ,

have al l thei r money stole to puni sh them for skin flin ts an d ,

nipcheeses. ’

I shall lock mine up safe said I . I to have a sea ,

’ ’
m
chest an d I ll bury an d hide my money away down at the
,
’

bottom . ’

And you call that manners he cried indignant. And a ,

being messmates ! Well well we shal l see . , ,

”
90 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
H is eproach
r , lthough uttered in
a a s neerin g tone struck ,

me .
Y oushall have hal fmy money I said . ’

Ah Mr. Rabbit that s a better spi rit . That s more

, ,
’ ’

polite m anners. We shal l be good messmates I see . I ,

feared I was mi stook in your character by what Mi ss Lee

tol d me. ’

What did she tell you I as ked .

She said you was a dear little boy said he an d

m
, ,

mimicked Winsome s ton e of speech but with so ething

’
,

in his m anner that was very hurtful to my pride .

I
’
m
not a little boy I declared indignantly at least I
,
’
,

sh an t b e to -morrow an d she s no right to call me one.

’ ’ ’
,

Youre an ungrateful young swab said he an d don t

’
,
’
,
’

u o rd di sre spectf ul gain st Mi ss Lee . She s going

’
w
m
o sa a a
y y
to be my toast thi s voyage . T he Ad orab le Win so e I You
”

ought to be down on your knees to thank her for the interest

she condescend s to tak e in such a land -crabas you. And he ’

turned short on his heel with his back to me an d began ,

to parad e up an d down as particular as though he were in ,

an enemy s cou ntry casting contemptuous glances at me

’

, ,

which soon d rove me indoors.

I immedi ately so u ght out Winsome whom I found in the ,

garden at the back of the house . She was by this time

grown a great big gi rl ofnearly fourteen an d her dresses ,

almo st let down long . And althou gh ofa di f ficult age to

exhibit herself to ad vantage certainly made no fail ure in ,

doing so.
Mi stress Wi n some I said what is thi s you have been
,
’
,
—
telling Master Flinn that youacco unt me a little boy
Why Shimmy said she (the ost ofthem pron ounced
, ,
’
m
my name in that way after the fashion set by the Princess)
, ,

what has vexed you? I f I did say youwas a dear littl e

boy do you forget it was I who taught you yo ur letters ?
m
,

And would youhave me call youa young an

I
’
m m
not a young an yet said I but I have no mind to ,
’
,
 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
This he certainly had done though without an y suf fi cien t,

reason . B u t I could not deny it.

Oh Shimmy cried Winsome reproachfully .
,

N ay n ay I cried ; b
, ut she flashed round an d darted ,

indoors again before I could explain .

So Mr. R abbit youre one to carry tales are youP said
’ ’
, , ,

Flinn . Faith ! an d o u
I get y abo rd !a B ut the e
r — he
went on in his odious superior style don t interrupt me on ’

duty . An d began walking up an d down again as cocky as a

’

terrier his chin very stif

, f in the air an d his eyes as ifthey ,

couldn t see such a thing as me.

’

I t was decided that Captain Monday sho u ld stay d inner

with the Princess an d presently word was sent out that
,

Flinn was to have his with me in the steward s room . Thi s ’

brought us together agai n ( for I had left him when he

assu med that haughty air) an d now he pretended to be very ,

f riendly bef ore Monsieur Sicard an d Mrs. Sander an d pro ,

tested his intention ofbefriending me on board the F earrwug ht '

,

an d seeing that I was n ot imposed u pon . And then he told

me no end ofyarns of what wen t on in the idship en s m m ’

mess some ofthem en ough to make a new hand want to run

,

away bef ore be shipped .

About eight o clock word was sent down for e to attend
’
’
m
at the Princess s dinner table an d when I got there what
-
,

m ust H er R oyal Highness do but pour me out a glass of

wine with her own hand an d say it was her intention to ,

d rink my health . Her lad ies did the same an d Captain ,

Mond ay too —on ly spilt the wine al l over the cloth as he

,

was po u ull try

ring it an d ne ver got his gl ass above hal f f
, ,

—
how he would an d waste what he did an d they al l wished
m
,

me Good l uck an d the Captain tried to slap e on the

,
’

shou lder only slapped Mrs. Lee instead an d vowed I was a

, ,

l ucky yo ung dog to have such a generous mi stress. H is

manner was quite changed f rom what it had been be f ore
dinner an d it seemed to me he had d runk a great deal
,

more wine than was good for him . Soon after this he left ,
 THE LIFE F OR ME 93

directin g Flinn to give him his ar down the cli f f an d see m ,

they did not run on an y rocks for it was a foul night. And ,
’

I heard afterwards he had to be li fted into his boat whenever

he came back from dining out.
I had j ust seen him depart an d was standing in the door ,

way ( f or it was a lovely su mmer night) when I felt a tap on ,

my sh oul d er an d there was Winsome.

,

Shimmy she said here is a little presen t I have made

,
’
,

for
y o
,u ’
an d p u t into my h and s a hou s
if a mo st u se ful ’
,

article f or sailors con taining needles an d thread an d a

,

thimble an d scissors an d indeed everything need ful for to

, , ,

mend clothes.
T is youwho are good to me I cried an d I th ank you
’ ’
, ,

very m uch . And I hope Mi stress Winsome you did not , ,

be l ieve what Mas ter Flinn insinuated against me. ’

Why no she said . I have little faith in Master Flinn .

’

m
, ,

Not when I ca e to think it over. F or ifyouwere vexed ,

Shimmy an d showed it to him it was the construction he

m
, ,

pu t on my wo rd s who when I spoke to hi , abo u t y,ou h ad ,

but one thought an d that was to secure youa friend .

,
’

I fear said I Flin n will be no f

,
’
rien d to me .
,
’

I fhe is not said she youwill tell him that I shal l have
’
, ,

nothing to say to him the next time he returns. ’

Th at will go further than anything to make him civil .

F or he hath taken a mon stro us great f ancy to
y ou Mi stress ,

Winsome an d says youare to be his toast this voyage . T he

m
,

Adorab k Win s o e he call s you . ” ’

The stupid boy she laughed an d yet I could see liked ,

what I told her. And who is to be yo ur toast Shimmy ,

Why said I I shal l have no toast at al l . F or I con hi

,
’
,

have none other than y ou an d youhave been took . ’

m
,

Nevertheless I wi l l be your toast said she an d you ay ’

m
, , ,

tell Master Flinn it is so with y leave (an d then gave me

her hand in the moonlight) . And you ay kiss my hand m
m
m
,

Shi , y an d te l l him I allowed youto do so. ’

I went do wn on one knee as she hersel fhad taught me to ,

94 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
do what time I kissed the Princess s hand an d put y lips to ’
, m
hers. And then she bent do wn an d in the sweetest wayyou , ,

co uld wi sh gave me a kiss on my forehead .

,

There Shimmy she whi spered I kiss you good l uck .

, ,
’
,
”

Only youm ust not tell Master Flinn that

Oh Mi stress Winsome I cried stormed by her kindness
, ,
’
, ,

—
I do love you I really do do love you ,

Why there she cried youare my dear little boy again

, ,
’
, ,

whom I taught his letters to. And then sighed . But when ’

youcome back Shimmy youwill be a great , an o r a t le

,as t m ,

a mid shipm an which is of tentimes mo re important. And I

,

shall h ave to call my dear little boy Master R abbit

N y n ay I cried .
a , Let me for ever b
,
’
e— your little boy ,

dear Mi stress Winsome

She glanced at me an d shook her head an d ran into the ,

house . But stopped at the foot ofthe stai rs an d looking at , ,

me fl ung me a ki ss that was never intended to strike me on

,

the forehead .

The nex t day I was in formed that the Princess was hersel f
going on board the F earn oug ht to see the vessel an d ,

Captain Monday came ashore in his cutter in the forenoon to

con vey her there . Just before she s tarted she sent for me ,

an d Mrs. Sander cond u cted me to her room where she was

m
,

sittin g dressed on her co u ch an d left e there at a sign given ,

by her Mi stress.
T is my cu stom said the Princess to gifall my boys
’

m
, ,

some oot dvi ce be f o e I send d e u t into de wo ld And

m
g a r o r .

so I have send f or you Shi my to say a few leetle word s. I

, ,

sall not b u rden you vid a long lect u re onl y tell you Be ,

trootf ul be o bed ien t ; be brafe And a l va s remember ou

y y
P rin cess of Vedas Ieeth b n d dat votever oudo
"
are de
”
o
y a y ,

must be done for to bring credit to her. Y ouare n ow going

into de Servi ce of de King ; bear in mind it is a noble
Service an d d at d o fi rst ting is B e b r a in b
f l j
‘

m
a tt a nd n e er
, o e ,

ch w an yfi wr. I tinkdere vill come a ti e ver soon ven

” ’

o
96 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
And then with a sudden impul se she stooped down an d
, ,

—
kissed me on the cheek as I knew with pride she might
, ,

a s —
h ve ki sed one of gentle birth an d bad e me d ry my tears
an d appear cheerf ul an d happy .
F or see Shimmy she said
, ,
’
here is a present for you
,

ight golden guineas into my hand with a

an d slipped fi ve br ,

smile an d nod ofher head . An d now yousall gifme yo u

m
r

to de boat d at we go aboard in . ’

m
ar

And so with her hand on my ar that was some day to

, ,

be Q ueen ofEngland I entered the King s Navy as a mid

’

m
,

ship an on bo ard the F i hting F earn ou ht.

g g
 C HA P T ER V III

T RAFALGA R D AY S

TH I S is not a story ofthe sea an d its service an d usage n or

m
, ,

indeed a I one who can write youofthe Glorio us Deep

,

Bl ue Ocean as Lord Byron calls it which was never more

,
’
,

glorio us than d uring the fi rst eighteen months I served in H is

Maj est s Navy .
y
’

A f e w day s after I was rated aboard the F earn oug ht she

was o rdered to j oin Lo rd Nelson s fleet at Toulon an d was
’
,

engaged in al l those subsequent stran ge an d engrossing opera

tions which l ed his lordship such a pretty dance an d chase
af ter V illeneuve to Egypt an d back then quartering the ,

middle Mediterranean an d so poising at Palermo to listen

,

an d look f or those fleein sail that had escaped the eyes of

g
his crui ser kites. And my Lord writing : My g ood fortun e
-

m
see s to have
fl ow n awa .
y I can n ot
g et a f air win d or even ,

a sid e win d . D ead f ou l —d ead f ou l

At last his geni us extricated him from his d if ficul ties an d
perplexities an d with ten as fin e ships as ab
, ly co ,an d edm
m ,

an d in as pew f ect order an d he a l th a s eve r wen t to sea

( pa inted note
, yo u in h is
, own p ar tic u l a r w ay the same being
,

with t wo yellow streaks an d the portholes black ) he was ,

able on the 5th of May 18 05 to l a a co u rse f or Gibraltar

, y, ,

an d on the 11th to win thro u gh the Gut .

And then as the Atl antic opened out before us our
, ,

destination being the Spani sh Main an d the West Indies

m
,

whither had slipped Ad i ral V illeneu ve an d his eighteen

[ 97 ] 7
98 THE QUEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
French an d Spani sh scamperers Nelson gave this direction to
m
,

his Captain s T ake youa F renc h an a iece

if w overhaul
m m p e

the an d le ave e the Span iard s ( the e we e eight f the

m
, r r o

Don s ships) . When I haul down y coburs I expect you

’

m
,

to d o the sa e, an d n ot til l then .

’

We reached the West Indies early in Jun e an d Lord ,

Nelson was boggled there by fal se reports concerning the

enemy . The con seq uence was m uch val uable time wasted in
arrangements that were q u
, ite un need ful for the defence of ,

T rinidad an d Tobago an d f urther preparation s to repel rein

m
,

force ents offo urteen new ships that were supposed to have
follo wed in our track an d join ed V illene uve ; which was p urely
a phanto mfleet an d only existed in the fevered imagination
,

of the local au thorities who dreamed that they had seen

,

this sq uad ron. M uch val uable time wasted ; for V illeneuve ,

hearing that Lo rd Nel son had scented him scuttl ed out of ,

Martinico an d on the 9th ofJun e head ed east an d away to

, ,

snap u the tempo rary m astery ofthe Mediterranean as we

p ,

feared . We at that time arrived at Antigua in our search

—
af —
ter these scamperers had no sooner learnt they were bound
back again than my Lo rd Nel son starts us racing back too , ,

on the 13 th ofJun e our course directed for Gibraltar an d

, ,

ou r o rders to carry sail so long as ou r spars an d stick s stood ,

an d win there bef ore the F rench .

We reached Gibraltar abo ut the middle ofJul y the wind ,

having served us ill an d found not our fox there ; only we

,

had gotten the gates shut an d that was a mercy to be ,

thank ful for.

V illeneuve had indeed taken a more northerly track
, , ,

m aking for Ferrol where was another sq uadron crouching

,

in some harbo ur or other to support him when they had

the l uck or pluck to ef fect a j un ction .
We ofcourse did not know thi s so Lo rd Nelson led us
, , ,

back into the Atl antic with intention to crui se towards I re

,

land fearing V illeneuve might attempt a blow at our coasts.

m
,

But the third d ay out f rom Gibraltar the sloop T er a an t

g c
100 THE Q UE EN CAN DO NO WR ONG
best Armada that En gl an d could supply after the impoverish
m
v

ent often years ofwar.

Collingwood commanded os d uring the absence of Lord
N el son who reached the f leet near Li sbon on his forty
m
,

seventh bi rthday the same being the 2 9 th ofSepte

, ber an d ,

extra grog served out al l ro und ( as I well remember) an d every ,

Captain gotten aboard the Victory to congratulate the Chief

m m
,

who on that d ay i parted to the his plan ofaction did ,

they have the fortune to fall in with the enemy an d bring

them to battle .
And the Captains in Co uncil declared with reference to this
plan I t was n ew. I t was sin g ul ar. I t was si ple . I t was m
m
what y L ord N els on hi selfn a ed it m m
the N el son tou ch.
”

m m
,

A n d it u st su f
f ever the en e
cceed g l l w d t et at

hm
y a o e as o g
’
t e .

And Trafalgar was the an swer.

Well al l thi s is not what I sat down to write abo ut but a

, ,

su bject I was thrashin g out the other d aywith my old friend ,

Colonel S urges an d therefore fresh in my memory that

m
, ,

prepared myselffor the disputation with hi ( who was for

defending General B rereton an d asserti n g that he it was
,

who saved the West Indies to our King he being the very ,

m uddling soldier who did nearly ruin us l ) whereby it has ,

tumbled of f my quill pat on to the page . An d I leave it

there as wrote.
F or mysel f d uring those eighteen months I was being bred
,

into a sailor. The which included in its curricul um (as Mr.

C urtis would have phrased it) se veral fi ghts in the id ship en s m m ’

Mess especially with Flinn who beat me cruelly every d ay for

, ,

the f ortnight after I had gotten o ver my vomiting because

irst f
m
, ,

I would toast my Mi stress Win so e L ee an d compelled me ,

on the fi fteen th d ay to honour that toast wi th an unsuitable

but prudential silen ce . Likewise enco unters with every other
midshipman until I was drove to the concl usion there was
,

n ot one of them I co u ld beat at al l , at al l . And Captai n

 THAFALGA R DAYS 101

Monday reprim anded me for carrying more black eyes on to

the q uarter-deck than ( said he) was decent or even respectful ,

to H is Maj esty the Ki n g.

Y ousee I had overgrown my strength at thi s time an d was
, ,

more lanky than lusty an d although I believe I had the spirit

,

to fight to a fi n ish that same fi n ish always found me in a

m m
,

hori z ontal attit ude on the deck ofthe id ship en s messroom ’

,

which came to be considered as a sort ofnat ural reclining spot

f or me. Bu t the sea-air was soon to mend my f railty an d by ,

the time we had crossed the Atlantic an d I had ate some of ,

the oranges an d pine appl es an d custard apples an d m angoes

,
- -
, , ,

an d gu avas an d loq u
,
ats an d b anan as , common to those ,

i sl and s an d throw n of
,
fa touch of scurvy why I began to , ,

pick up like a horse let out to grass an d grow mettlesome

, ,

again . An d got u th ree or fo u steps in the Me ss by thrash

m
p r

ing those of y messmates who had thras hed me least hand

m el in th e previous year. B ut not yet able to drink my

m
so
y
Mi stress Wi n so e Lee s health aloud an d compelled to li sten
’

to Flinn d oing so the devil take him

,

So now we come to Traf algar an d the glorio u s 2 l st of

October one thousand eight h und red an d fi ve. But there !

,

They do saythat when I on ce get prating ofthat d ay I gro w ,

fi rst proud -bellied then p rosy an d fi n all y unintelligible in my

, , , ,

speech when it comes to the death of Nel son an d the fl ags ,

half-m as t high an d our battle won but our Chief in heaven .

, ,

And so I will not tell youthe tale that is better kno wn than
an y other in Engl and s sto ry . Saving only that Capt ain
’

Monday did his d uty an d was in Collingwood s col umn an d

,
’
,

though there was some di spute abo ut it it was undoubted ,

that the S an J ua/n struck to as an d a little l ater the P rin cipe

m
,

de Asturias us t have done likewi se b ut f or the d arkness an d ,

confusion ofthe smoky con flict that en abled her to wear ship
in mid action an d bear away for Cadi z an d so the coward s
-
,

escaped . And for the rest we on board the F earn oug ht had
, , ,

only seven killed an twenty six wo unded amongst the l atter

d -

m
,

being Captain Monday with a u

,
s
q uet -
b all thro ugh the flesh
102 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
ofhis m
left ar ( who cried to think that his usq uet-ball had m
not hit Nelson an d Nelson s him ) an d little the worse for it.
’

m
, ,

And I got an other black eye with a splinter thi s ti e an d , ,

that was the only m ark Trafalgar left upon me except , ,

perhaps to make me a little proud who had smelt the smoke

, ,

of that hi sto ric victory an d more v ain than I shou

, ld be ,

because it was my l uck to appear in the despatches as Mick

shi
p m m
a n J a es Rab bit sl i h
g ytl woun d ed .
,
’

An d two evenings l ate r I toasted my Mi stress Winsome

Lee aloud an d Flinn held his peace . But the weather was
’

m
,

very foul fro the south -west an d the fleet not in a position ,

of saf ety with great danger to the captured an d crippled

,

ship s ru nni n g ashore . And Flinn busy with his thoughts

an d anxietie s.

And Nel son dead on board the Victory with an example ,

left to al l England for al l ages.

51
6 ii? ilé ii?

The F earn oug ht was kept at sea until May 18 06 when we

m
, ,

retu rned to Portsmou th an d were paid off I m ad e y way

m
. ,

to Blackheath immedi ately f or to pay y h umb l e d uty to

the Princess of Wales who was in residence at Montague
,

House .
H er Royal Highness received e ost kindly an d graciously mm ,

an d was pleas ed to sa I had p roved mysel fa credit to her

y
ch arity . An d she did order a room for sleeping in to be
assigned to me in the R ou nd Tower ( where I l ay that time
my leg was broke— the ve ry same room in fact) where I was , ,

to take up my q uarters for the period of my leave. And

m
he rsel fgave me the su oft wenty gui n eas as a token ofher

N ote b M Surges Hastin gs.—Lieu m

m m
H ten an t Fl in n tol d in
m f m
y r . astin gs e

18 20 that af te r seein g the f eat Mid sh ip an J i R bb it t d

m
y a p e r o r e a

T rafal gar, he cou l d n ever l if

t han d again st h i again . Mr. Rabbit, ’

said h e, u
j p d m verb d d w w d h m S J u t b d
m
e o oa r , an s a to ar s t e a n an o oar

her sin gl e-han d ed , an d when she struck he was the fi rst En gl ish an
on h er d eck .
’ ’
T was l ike J i y, ev er am
m a d
—
I ris h a nm in h is bl m
oo d ,

thou g h En g l is h in h is sp eec h a n d b rin gin u

g p l H . S . H .
 104 T HE QUEEN CAN DO N O WRONG
helpless an d she brave an d a Princess ofBrunswick when she
m
,

rescu ed e f rom Pas co . An d Annette came u nder her care

some three or f our years before I did an d had spent the ,

period at a school at B ath kept by a Mrs. Twiss who was a ,

si ster to Mrs. Siddon s the accompli shed actre ss ; an d Annette

,

had not seen Her R oyal Highness in the interim un til now .
It was when the Princess dismissed me after my fi rst inter
view that I went to pay my respectful homage to my Mi stress
Win some L ee . An d found her in the garden being di rected ,

by Krackel er (good Lord ! how delighted that good fellow

was to see me ! ) to a di stan t part of it where was built a ,

grotto by the Pri n cess that showed her extraordinary ill

,

taste which deprived her Highness s character ofan y cl aim s

,
’

to arti stic sensibility. Not that I would abuse that grotto ,

which had a charm ofits own in the complete secl u sion it

aff orded an d wherein ( outhis d ay I a writing about ) I met

, m
once again my charming Win some an d with her Annette ,

Tempest.
m
Win some received e with so e embarrassment who was m ,

n ow grown a biggi sh boy off ourteen years of age. Indeed ,

she called me Master Rabbit when she shook hands but ’

, ,

perceiving the look ofdi sappointment in my face added in ,

her sweetest way

Are younot grown too big to be call ed Shimmy P ’

N ay said I ; with you who taught me my letters I can

’
, , ,

never be anything b ut litt l e . ”

She l aughed .
Y ou were very little she said . Littler than I ! But
’

m
,

now why Shimmy you top e by four inches An d I think

, , ,

it is very unki n d ofyou

I shall be better able to fi ght for you said I ifOppor ,
’
,

tu n it favou s me . And tho ug t f M te Flinn with

’

y r h o as r ,

whom I had not yet fought it out to a fi n ish.

Y ouare very bloodthi rsty said she since ouhelped to
’

y , ,

beat Admiral V illeneuve an d Admiral Gravine. An d how is

your wound Shimmy i ,
"
 TRAFALGAR DAYS 105

Do not as k me about that said I for t was nothing ,

”
,
’

worse than a black eye at the very end of the fi ght an d not
m m
,

nearly so b ad as some I co n tracted in the id ship en s Mess.

’ ’

But youwere mentioned as one ofthe wounded in the

Despatches
‘
That I think said I an d told the truth was more
, ,
’
, ,
‘

C aptain Monday s kindn ess than my deserts.

’ ’

An d there you have it f or beyond being d az ed f

,
or a
,

couple ofhours my wound was simply suf

,
fi cien t f
or a jest .

And cost me m any a hypocritical condolence an d inqui ry from

my messm ates who never forgave e for having y name in
, m m
the Despatches.
Whilst thi s converse was going ou I was aw are ofan other ,

girl seated in a sort of inner chamber to the grotto ( being

j ust able to see her skirt) who was Annette Tempest. An d
,

n o w Winsome p resented me to her. An d I can tell ou I

y
was astou nded when bro ught face to face with her for it
m
,

reminded me of looking in the mi rror an d seeing y own

f ace tran smi grated in th at u pside down world where men
-
,

turn into women an d women into men at the bidding ofthe

f ashionable vi siting m agici an s.

Annette said Winsome thi s is Mr. James Rabbit but

’

m
, , ,

I call hi Shimmy because I taught him his letters. ’

I took of fmy hat an d bo wed very low an d Annette gave ,

me a form al courtesy so that you might think we were two

,

grown up courtiers accustomed to bow an d scrape . She was

-
,

m
older than mysel fby perhaps a year an d where a gi rl is ,

fif teen an d a boy f o urteen there is more between the than

m
,

twelve ca lendar onths for the one is bordering on woman

,

hood an d the other only halfway thro ugh boyhood .

-

However by token of my Fame (which My Lady Kind

,

an d Bou nti ful had blaz oned forth) Annette did condescend ,

to grant me some slight ceremony which had the ef fect of ,

crushing rather than in spiriting me. F or when my bow an d

scrape were f ini shed an d a cou gh given I had nothing
, ,

further to of fer.
106 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
In which pass Winsome came to my assi stance an d with , ,

her inimitable tact an d kindn ess set me at my ease by pro,

posing I sho uld tell them al l about the Battle ofTrafalgar.

Which I did to the best ofmy ability an d depicted the ,

smoke an d con f - e an d the tum ult of the

uion of sea stri f
m
s ,

con flict an d the th u

, nders that reverberated fro the shores
of Spain an d the fl ames of the ships that cau
,
—
ght re al l
fi
an d everythi n g in a glo rio u s muddle as it recurred to my
memory ( being nervous in the presence ofthese two young
damsels) until it came to the death ofNelson an d the Signal ,

to the Fleet an d the Fl ags lowered hal f-mas t high . An d

,

then I could not help it but I found mysel fweeping as I told

m
,

these two dear gi rls (for dear they both became to e ) ofthe
tears that were shed at e ven of the d ay ofV ictory by brave ,

hardy veteran s when they heard that news who were grinning ,

in the face ofDeath that afternoon . And as I told them of

the Battle won an d the wind wailing in the torn rigging an d
, ,

Lord Admi ral Nel son dead on the Victory there were tears ,

in those t wo gi rl s eyes as well . ’

So I d ried mine ( that had to set them a m anly example ) ,

an d acq uainted them ofhow v ali antly Captain Mond ay f ought

the F ea g mm
l ht an d got him a wo u
,
nd in the ar th at he m
al ways cu ffed us midshipmen with ( for the which we in the
Mess were mightily thank ful an d did of er up a Mag n gficat
f
'

to the God of Battles) an d how Master Fli n n came out a

,

Lieutenant from that en gagement havi n g comported him sel f ,

in a style every way worthy of the service so that we al l

m
,

envied him . ( Notwithstan d ing I ust still fi ght him to a

,

fi n ish.)
And how is Master Flinn asked Winsome.
H e drank your toast every d ay said I an d would not let ,
’
,

me do so alo ud till after the V ictory an d then ,

—
And then what Shimmy P ,
’

Why he didn t interfere an y longer.

,
’ ’

An d was that the fi rst time youd rank my toast P ’

No indeed . I drank it fourteen times an d got fourteen

, ,
 C HAPTER IX
T HE DELI C AT E I N V ESTI GATI ON

AN D now the spinning Wheel ofFortune is to give the ball

e another violent toss an d t wi st, that j umps it clean
of my li f

out of H is Majesty s Navy into the sea servi ce ofan honest

’

M aster Mariner an d Merchant Adventurer. And it came to

pass in this way.
It was on the 7th of Jun e 18 06 that Captain Mond ay
m
, ,

su ddenly arrived at Montague House having been sum oned

,

there by an express messenger d espatched at midn ight by the

Princess. H e came in the early morning an d was closeted ,

with Her R oyal Highn ess for a couple of hours in consulta ,

tion with the Princess s lawyer who had been fi rst sent for
’
,

to give advice . F or there was some m atter of desperate

dan ger impending.
m m
And the atter was this ; for I ay as well d isclose it
now though I did not learn the full particulars till any
, m
years afterward s when I chanced to see a copy of The P ro
,

ceed in s an d Correspon d en ce u
g pon the S u bj f
ect o the I n ui
g y r

in to the Con d u f
ct o H or R o al H i hn ess the P rin cess
y g of W al es .

From the pages ofwhich I will n ow proceed to enlighten you ,

so that you shall f ollow the incident in this chapter m uch

be tter than I co uld not withstanding I was an actor in it.
,

I have mentioned how Sir John an d Lad y Douglas had

become estranged from Her Royal Highness. The reason of
m
that estran gement you ayread for yoursel fin an interesting
an d as I think su
, ,
ffi cien tl y authentic tract (thou gh published
108 l
 THE DELICATE IN V E STIGATION 109

a nonymously an d with as terisked names substituted) in

,

tituled T he D eath-b
, f
ed Con ession
f
o the L ate Cou n tess
of
Gu ern sey Jersey of course) ; an d L ad y Douglas s char
,
’ ’

acter is too contemptible a thing f or me to transf er her

personal mock mod esty an d imaginary miseries that incited
her mal ice into my pages which I desi re to keep as clean as
m
,

aybe when one is writing ofR oyalty in the h u man . There

rem ained the R esu lt as it affect ed the Princess ofWales ,

n amely a lyi n g Statement sworn to by Lady an d ( that weak

,

fool an d petticoat-ridden creature) Sir John Douglas an d ,

presented to the Prince ofWales through the Duke ofSussex ,

herein that abandoned woman an d her husband attached w , ,

accu sed H er R oyal Highness of being the mother of the boy

William Austin an d offamiliar cond uct involving charges

, ,

o f High Treas on again st her an d several worthy gentlemen

o f her acq u aintance — Mr. Lawrence the painter an d Sir

Sidney Smith an d Captain Monday were three of them
with the punishment ofDeath ifguilty .
The Prince ofWales immediately prayed H is M aj esty the
King to ord er an Investigation i n to these charges. The
King weak in his intellect an d in the hands ofhis termagant
,

wife Q ueen Charlot te ( who hated the Princess of Wales for

, ,

that Her Majesty had stolen an d read a private Di ary ofthe

Princess in which the Con so rt of the Sovereign was all uded
,

to in no flattering term s) yielded to her pressure which was

, ,

rather her di rection to him wh at to do an d i ssu ed a Com

m
,

i ssion on the 9th ofMay 18 06 appointing Lord Chancellor

, ,

E rskine Lord ChiefJ ustice Ellen borough Lord Spencer an d

, , ,

Lord Grenville ( the two latter Ministers in the Cabinet) to

inquire into the truth of certain Written Declarations
to uchin g the Cond uct of Her R oyal Highness the Princess
o fWales . And this was the famous D elicate I n vestig ation .
”

The Commissioners met at Lord Gren vil l e s house in ’

Do wning Stree t on the l et ofJ un e 18 06 when Lady Douglas , ,

an d Sir John Dou gl as did both ( in the opin ion of the Com
missione rs who acquitted the Prince ss enti rely ofthe charge
,
110 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
of being the mother ofWilli am Austin as was foul ly alleged )
,

er u s to tr an d ru cter an d wreck
p j r e them selve y in the cha ra
the life ofthe Royal Lad y whose intimacy they had enj oyed
, ,

an d whose condescen sion an d hospitality experienced times

without number.
Outhe 6th ofJu n e the Commi ssioners heard an d recorded

the sworn depositions of R o b ert Bigood a meni al an m

m
,

serv ant in the employ of the Princess an d Willia , Cole ,

one ofher pages. And before fi ve ofthe clock that after

noon a full Report of their testimony together wi th that ,

given by Sir John an d Lady Douglas was in the hands of,

H er R oyal Highness sent her anonymously by some secret

,

-
well wi sher.
—
No sooner received an d read by her an d sure its contents , ,

were enough to cause the stoutest heart to quail than the—

Princess who had been ai l ing for fi ve months past under an
,

in d efi n ite cloud of horror hovering over her recovered her ,

Spartan spirit. A galloping groom was sent to summon her

lawyer that momen t an d at midnight an other to bring
,

Captain Monday to Montague H ouse where he had not ,

been since his return having received a hint not to call there
,

f or the present . And at eleven o clock the next mo rning a

’

cou ncil was holden by the Princess her lawyer Captain

, ,

Monday an d Mrs. Lee .

,

I cannot tell youwhat took place thereat. At nine I was

m
ordered before hi by Captain Monday who bade me dress ,

mysel fin my best uniform with side-arm s an d be ready to

, ,

attend him to London whither he was

, g oing on urgent
business an d would start within the hour.
m
,

I was ready you ay be sure wonderi n g what it al l meant

, , ,

an d why thi s gloom had settled on the hou se as tho u gh Death ,

had entered it. F or Mrs. Lee who was a composed wom an

, ,

was weeping bitterly when she came ou t of the Princess s

’

apartments an d Winsome an d An n ette were by her orders

,

most grave an d restrained in their behavio ur.

It was b ad n ews
,
’
Winsome informed me ; but that was
112 T HE Q UEEN CAN n o N O WR ONG
H e looked q uick ro und at me, estimating me it were
m
, as ,

his f
ace very red an d in fla ed .

No I wouldn t pit youwith an y but a gentl e

’
id he,
’

m
, sa

Mr. Rabbit damn me if I would F or you are a

m
an , ,

gentleman an d one I was proud to com and on Trafalgar

m
,

Day. And that is why I have chose youto be y witness.

’

Thank you sir said I an d felt more pro ud at h is speech

, ,
’

than ifI had been promoted Master s M ate . F or I did dearly ’

love Captain Monday who was as good an d gallant a Captain

,

as ever sailed or f ought under Nelson .

Mr. Rab bit said he very solemnly I a going to clear
,
’
,
m
—
the P incess or be broke.
r

Oh Captain dear I cried frighten ed by his earnestness

, . , ,

for God s sake no Con sider ofit

’

m
,

Bu t he cut e short .

I have b ro ught you with me said he not to give me ,

’
,

advice the which is no part ofyo u

, r duty Mr. Rabbit but , ,

in the nature ofa breach ofdi sciplin e . B ut to be a witness

to what happens an d carry a Report ofit to the Princess if
,

He did n ot complete his sen tence but I knew he was going ,

into a greater dan ger for his honour than he ever ri sked when
he went into action at sea no m atter whether the odds were ,

two or twen ty or two hundred to on e. F or Captain Monday

, ,

was one of those fi ghtin g f earless sailors who sent the ,

carpenter aloft to n ait he colours to the mast an d recognised ,

—
only two proper situations at sea master of the waves or
under them .

We reached Lord Gren vil l e s house in Downing Street ’

where the Commi ssioners were sitting at noon . And in the

m
,

hal l whom should I see but Fr nce Lloyd the fl

'

a s co ee -roo ,

m aid at Montague Ho use an d Mary Anne Wilson my ol d , ,

nurse as you might call her very whi te as she ran up an d

, ,

clutched hold ofme .

m
Master Shi my dear she whispered tis a foul conspiracy
,
’
, ,
’
 THE DELICATE INV ESTIGATION 113

to ruin my mistress ! The pigs in there have been as king me

the most disgustin g questions. About the appearance ofH er
Highn ess s morni n g b
’
ed an d al l — the indecent beas ts ! Are
,

y ou
, too o rde
, red he re to give evidence ? Be ware ofthe di rty

smooth old dog f - ox at the head ofthe table She referred

to my Lord Chancel l or E rskine.
I shook my head in negative to her question to me an d ,

before she could say an y more Captain Monday called me

m m
,

to escort hi an d we went straight to the Co mi ssioners

,
’

Council Chamber.
The bead l e who had announced Captain Monday s
,
’

arrival ( that desired to see thei r Lord ship s on the u rgent

business ofH er R oyal Highness the Princess ofWales) opened ,

the door for him to enter an d at the same time signalled to

m m
,

e to keep back . Bu t I du cked an d d ived under his ar ,

who was an elderly fat pompous old codger an d into the

, , ,

room f , rom whence he had not the wit to expel me by word

of comm and And when the door shut I came to attention

.

by the side of it partially hid by Captain Monday who at

, ,

once advanced to the foot ofthe table at the which were

mm
,

seated f o ur gentlemen who I ay best describe in the poet s

,
’

w ord s as Most Potent Grave an d R everend Seigniors.

’
, ,

Potent they assuredly were commissioned by the Kin g , ,

an d met here to inq u i re whether the future Queen ofEngland

had bee n f aithless to her hu sb and . And as they fi xed thei r
eight stern eyes on my Capta in I tre bled for hi . m m
An d pray C aptai n Monday what is your business asked
, ,

he whom Mary Anne Wilson had described not without ,

truth as the old dog -fox . F or my Lord High Chancel l or

m
,

E rski n e was ever a deep dangerous an who stuck at nothing

, ,

to ad vance his own in terests an d pitchfork his relatives in to

the vast number ofappoi n t ents that were in his patronage m
vice to which Lo d Ch ncello s appear to be m uch ddicted
( a r a r a ,

especially whe n going out ofof fi ce) an d was a king ofcasuistry ,

as well an d a toady an d crony in his old f

,
oxy way of the , ,

Prince ofWales .
114 T HE QUEEN CAN DO N O WR ONG
m
I a informed my Hono urable Lords that certain L ies
, ,

affecting my personal hono ur have been sworn to before Your

Honourable Lord ships. ’

L ies cried Lord Chief Ju stice Ellenbo rou gh sharply in ,

the voice an d manner he af fected with j unior counsel whom ,

it was his delight to browbeat from the Bench. Be careful

what yousay sir. Y ouare not privileged .
,
’

I say L ies repeated my Captain as boldly an d d efi an tl y

,
’

as he carried his ship into the enemy s line at Traf algar.

’

My God sir do you know who I a P roared the Chief

, ,
m ’

Justioe.
I have not that honour says my Captain with an ,
’
,

inquiring eye cocked to coax the in form ation .

m
I a Lord Ellenborough. ’

What cried my Captain a broad grin spreading over ,

his f ace like a su nri se the same whose Lady smuggled the
,

lace in her an d was smoked an d stopped an d searched

an d scented ou t by the C u stom Hou se Of fi cers thi s side of
Dover P ”

( Thi s w a s a fi n e sto ry an d pe rfectly tru e ag a

,in st Lad y ,

Ellenborough an d striven to be kept a dead secret by her

,

husband ! And how Captain Monday had gotten hold of it

God only knows ; but he sl aughtered the Lord ChiefJustice
of Engl and with it that d a by retal iating it in su ch p rompt
y
retort .)
Lord Spencer a ginger-coloured an now came to the
,
m ,

front f or ( as I cou
, ld see) Lord Erskine was too tickled at
his legal brother s conf usion to do more than heave an d
’

shake an d grow am az ing red in the f ace with a wink to Lord ,

Grenville an d a sl y cock ofhis thumb towards Lord Ellen

boro ugh that did seem to increase the latter s chagrin.
,
’

What d e wan t demands Lord Spencer rudely of my

’

Captain.
I want my denial an d refutation ofthese foul lies took on
oath says my Captain an d draws hi selfup very proud an d
,
’

, m
portly .
116 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
I do therefore desire an d require to contradict it an d have ,

that Lie struck of fyo u r Record s. And he pointed with his

’

sword to the papers an d book s littered on the table .

B ut consider sir if you please sa s Lord E rskine

’
, , y , ,

smoother than ever we are but servants ofthe King . His

,

Maj esty hath l aid his Royal Command upon us ( which n o

loyal servant ofH is Maj esty Naval Military or Civil dare , , , ,

diso bey ) . He hath bidden us examine certain unaf fected

witnesses an d no others. Y ou sir are implicated in the
, , ,

affair an d being so you r sweari n g cannot mend the m atter.

m
, , ,

F or if I
,
a so pu
y t it withou t o f
fen ce
you are one of the ,

acc used in thi s t ri al . And the t e stimony ofaccused persons

(yo ur own excellen t intelligence will assu re u
y )
o cannot acq uit
them in l aw. ’

Aye an d is that so as ks my Captain turning very

, ,

white an d sweeping the sweat f

,
rom his b row with a flick of

his fi n ger.
It is so, says Lord E rskine . Y ou ay swear, sir, ifyou
’
m
will. B ut your swearing cannot he took as evidence . Con
sider calmly ofit. On you r own fi n e Line ofbattle, when a
- -

Court martial is held to tryan o

- f
fi ce f fl
r or some o en ce— do you
'

take his evidence ? Does his testimony convince you he is

innocent ? I s he not rather j udged , solely an d entirely, on
the evidence ofless partial an d unimplicated parti es
That is true, says my Captain slowly an d thoughtfully,
’

som ewhat recovering his reason . That is true . And reflected ’

m
a gri moment, his sword waving slightly in his hand . A m
I implicated on the oath of th ese damned Liars that have
'

been swearing Her R oyal Highness s character away ’

Sir you are implicated says Lord E rskine an d back s

’

, , ,

away a cau tious step or two an d lets his hand fall on a chai r;
,

but do not for a moment take me to assert youare guilty . ’

And H is Maj esty

We h ave His Maj esty s comm and s to m ake this in
’

q ui ry
m
In to y cond uct
 THE DELI CATE IN VESTI GAT I ON 117

Into your conduct s1r as well as the cond uct ofothers.

, ,

Bu t be su re we shall exerci se the tru st with the greatest

circum spection an d a single desi re to do youj ustice . ’

My Captain gro und his heel n pon the floor an d his eyes ,

fluttered over those spiritless Lord s who f eared the sword he

,

still held in his hand . And j ust then came a battering at

the door with sounds as offorcing it. It drove my Captain
m
,

to an extre ity.
My Honourable Lords he cried in a voice that no
,
’
,

hurri cane could have drowned an d whose son oran oe echoed

,

through the chamber like the summoning angel s trump ’

m
,

a u
I h ve sed the sea boy an d an for seven an d twenty
,
- -
,

years. And served H is Maj esty King George the Thi rd for
every d ay an d every hour ofthem loyal l y an d as an of fi cer
m
,

an d gentle an sho u ld serve . I have served him in the Battle

an d the B reez e . I served hi in Traf lg
a ar Ba .m And if— if
H is M aj esty can think Matthew Monday is the
y
an to m
sed u ce H is a
’
u - —
M jesty s da ghter in l aw why then T hat for
-
, ,

the King
And with an action ofnoble pride an d d efi an ce that lifted
m
,

high above that ti orous quartette of four of the greatest

men an d Ministers in the Kingdo my Captain snapped his m ,

sword across his knee an d fl u

, ng the broken halves on to the
floor.
What could I do ? H e was my Captain . I must be loyal
to my Captain ; an d being loyal to hi ( yinstinct told me) mm
was being loyal to My Lad y Kind an d Bounti f ul . And so
I stepped six paces to the front an d l ugging out my cutlas s
m
, , ,

m ade atte pt to break it across my knee ; but the cursed

blade was too tough for me an d so I cast it into the fi re
m
,

place an d my dirk after it where they clattered fa ously .

, ,

An d then without a sal ute stalked out of the chamber in

, ,

the rear ofmy Captain ( who had unlocked the door him self) ,

with Lord Ellenborough running out to say to the gathered ,

as toni shed attendants Let the gentleman pass he is

,

took ill .
’
 THE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
Not tillwe were gotten into the clean open air did y m
aptain speak . And then he tu rned round an d held out ,

is hand to me an d I gras ped it.

,

Mr. Rabbit he said you will do me j u

,
’
, st ice to Her

oyal Highness
’
By God sir I will I an swered him .
, , ,

An d with that he nodded an d lef t me. An d as I heard , ,

fto the Admiralty hard by f

ent straight of or to pu t him sel f
d er arrest.

Shimmy said My Lad y Kind an d Bountiful when I told

,
’
,

er the sto ry ( as I h ave told it you ) th at aft ernoon youv os ,

ver my leetle boy . An d because youare stil l my dear boy ,

n d Captain Mond ay my ver goot an d honest f riend you

’

( 1 he vil l be ruinated in your profession Mine Gott mine

m
,

ott ! It vere far better for you Shi my had you never
, ,

et poo r C aroline ofB ru nswick . F or she is an evil star to

1 who serve her an d to al l whom she do th love .
’
,
 CHAPTER X
T HE PALACE OF SPI ES

I down to write my own history except so far

H AV E n e t sat ,

as it brings me into contact with her l ate graciou s Maj esty

Q ueen Caroline of England . Provided always that I ust m

make a story of it as the saying goes. It is therefore
,
’

necessary to string together the three period s of time I

address mysel fto with a su f
fi cien t cord ofconnection .
So now you wil l u nderstand how I co me to skip ( like a
m
kangaroo which strange ani al I saw in New Hollan d ) fro
,
m
the year 18 06 to the year 18 14 with j ust a few odd facts
,

wrote down to inform youof what happened in the gen eral

to me during the interim .
,

First then by favour of my generous Patroness who

m
, , ,

adv anced me the su of Two H u nd red Pound s sterling

( after I dep arted H is M a j y
est s N avy ) I advent
’
ur ed th at,

capital in a Mercan tile Speculation in the ship An n a com

m
,

an d ed an d p artly owned by Captain R obe rt Wil l i am E ast

wick a cred itable Master Mariner with whom I came to form

, ,

a tru e friendship (which still contin ues) notwith standing he

m
,

was a an ofthi rty - fi ve an d I a boy ofunder fi f teen .

E ast wick was in his way quite a rem arkab l e an . The *
m
most dogged I think I ever met in my life ; sincere kindly
, , , ,

e ligio us ad ventu rous brave au dacious when the occas ion

m
r , , , ,

demanded an d ever worthy. I was introd uced to hi

,

Captain R. W. Eastwicks L if e an d Ad ven tures have been ub

’

p
l ish ed un der the titl e A Master Marin er.
’

12 1
122 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
thro ugh a person cal led Jon es a wine merchant in Water
,

Lane Tower Street from whom Captain Monday obtained

, ,

his su pplies ofwine . Jones provided m any ships with liq uor ,

an d amongst his cu stomers was Captain Eastwick then fi ttin g ,

ou t the An n a f or a vent ure to B u enos Ayre s an d the L a

Plata in So uth America which places we had j ust captured
,

from the Spaniard s an d where was a good d em and f

,
or

Engl ish goods an d especially printed cottons.

m
,

I ay here mention that although there was no set attack

m ade upon Captain Monday over that m atter ofthe D el icate
I n vestig ation [f
rom which the Prince ss of Wales was de

livered absol utely acquitted except so far that the Lord s

m
,

Co mi ssioners felt compel l ed to put in an expression ofmere

Opinion to save the whiskers (as the Moorish phrase goes)
of the Fi rst Gentlem an in E u rope an d afford a col ourable
,

excuse for his acti on ] my Captain s name was m arked as was

’

m
, ,

mine ifa midshipman s ay be so distingui shed he being a

,
’
,

mighty little mite .

There was in fact nothin g actually threatened ; but
, ,

Captain Monday could not fi n d it compatible with his

personal honour to continue to wear His Maj est s u
y ni f
orm
’
,

more particularly with the Prince of Wales likely to be

appointed Re gent an d in conseq u
, en ce resigned his command .
With his resignation went al l my hopes an d prospects by the
board . He reti red to his ancestral acres in S uf folk an d I , ,

through his paternal ad vice an d the Princess s generosity ’

,

m ade a new start in l ife as a Merchant Adventurer attuned ,

to the scale ofTwo H undred Pound s an d had my venture ,

th Captain Eas twick in his ship An n a.

, m
Well the Ar a left England early in November I rated ,

as f ourth mate aboard her. We reached L a Plata on Christ

m as D ay an d spoke the f
, rigate Med u s a who inf ormed us ,

Buenos Ayres had been retook by the Spaniards an d the ,

British Army temporarily retreated to Mol d an ad o to await

m
,

in force en ts an d regain the city . And to Mol d an ad o we were

instructed to proceed ifwe desired the protection ofthe Fl eet.

124 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
F rom the Cape I sailed to New Holland in the year 18 08 ,

an d from thence , in 18 09 , in the quality of second m ate to ,

the E ast Indies where I j oined the Country Service for a few
,

months an d then entered the Bombay M arine as Second

,

Lieutenant ofa Brig-of-War an d rose to be Lieutenant-Com

,

m ander. From 1810 to 18 13 I was engaged in the o pera

tions connected with exti rpating the nests ofpirates in the
Persian Gul fan d of fthe coast of Cu tchee . A hard service ,

owing to the great heat an d fevers but enlivened from time ,

to time with excursions again st the French p rivateers that

rioted in Indi an waters u p to the yea r 18 14 u nde r such
splendid seamen—a splendid notwith standing they were
y , ,

—
Frenchmen as Constance in his swi ft d arling L E ug én ie ,
’
,

an d Jean D u terte an d Cou rson . Men ofamaz ing mettle I ,

can tell you; hold daring def

, iant sea-dogs whose names
, ,

are as dear to French ears as Pau l Jon es s to those of the ’

Ameri cans or Commodore Dance s to L ead en hal l Street. ’

But here let me stop . Those were day s I m ust not tru st

my pen to w rite abo ut . That l ustre ofmy life the best an d ,

most crowded with incident from a sailor s point of view

,
‘

has no rightf ul connection with my story . I fI mention it ,

tis simply to sho w youwhere I was within the peri od indicated

’
,

that has to be skipped over an d to use it merely as a,

string to thread together my pearl s by the which I mean the ,

incidents wherein My Lady Kind an d Bounti ful is con cerned .

And the mention ofher brings me to m ake one remark .
m
As was to be expected al l com unication between Her R oy al
,

Highness an d mysel fwas stopped after I left England saving ,

only that on the 17th of May in each year ( which was the
Princess s bi rthday ) I wrote her a d uti ful letter acq uainting
’

her of what I had done the previou s twelve months an d

m
,

wi shing her my hu ble compliments. From 1807 to 18 13

seven times in al l — I w rote her su ch a letter ; an d it was y m
r u
g ievo s il fortune that although she replied to every one of
l -
,

them b,
y some evil mi schan ce never a single an swer f
, rom h er
reached me . And there were in these graciou s letters some
 THE PALACE OF SPIE S 125

kind messages ofremembrance from Mistress Winsome Lee ,

with two or perhaps three from Annette Tempest . Annette

m m
, ,

always vowed she never co u l d exactly re ember how any ,

being disinclined to allow more th an two yet admitting the ,

possibility ofth ree .

So n ow we come to the year 18 14 during which occurred ,

those events that have to be recorded in thi s vol ume ofmy

book . And herein we have to meet an old enemy some old
m
,

f riends an d
, ake a new acq u aintance or two .

In September 18 13 I set sail from Bombay in the ship

, ,

Caledon b "
eing compelled by ill health to resign the service
,
-

o fthe Bombay Marine which I was pro u , der to belong to

than to His Majesty s Navy . And it was on board the
’

Caled on that I became acquainted with Colonel H astings

S urges with whom I stru
, ck up a fast friendship that hath
l asted ever sin ce con stant an d un alterable with the exception
, ,

ofa single occasion when we were hot to kill one another.

Colonel S urges had been engaged in the expedition against

Java an d no sooner Was that come to an end than he was
,

of fered an appointment in the E ast Indies to defend the

f rontiers ofou r te rritories ( newly acq u i red from the Mahrattas )
against the incu rsion s ofthe P in d arries who were noto riou

m
, s

mo unte d freebooters led by t wo chie fs n a ed Cheetoo an d

,

Dost Mahomed . Surges had as man y stories to tell ab o ut

these gallant ruf fians as I abo u t the Joas i pi rates an d those m
of Cu tchee an d the French Privateers ; an d I so etimes do m
think that between us we migh t have come at a very pretty
book ofbattle an d adventure by land an d sea such as would ,

be able to be read . But then again a book ofthat description

, ,

is not suited to ou r powers an d cou ld only be done by writing

,

each the other s adventures ; an d therein being friends we

’

m
, ,

ight be tempted to fall into exaggeration .

Ji m
m R bbi f u h i val en gage m d
m
y a t o g t n se ve n teen n a e n ts, an re

ce iv ed eight wou n d s (on e of which in val id ed hi out ofth e Service)

in the East I n dies. He was k n own in the I sl an d ofBo b m
ay as Rab bit
th e Devil to the men an d P ret y
t R a bbit
’
to th e wo en .— m
H. S. H .
126 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
It was the third day out at sea on the Caledon whereon I ,

was a passenger being at that time incapacitated f

, rom active

se rvice th at I came u
, pon Colonel Surges ill with a grievo us ,

fever lying upon the poop deck where the breez e was cool est.
,
-
,

It so happened the slanting sun was striking on his face who ,

was u nable to move b eing taken in the throes of an attack .

m
,

The little attention I paid to hi bro ught us together.

H e was a f ine fi gure of a an m
with a pai r of military ,

whi skers an d the military m an ner that is ever a trifle stilted

an d inclined to look ask ance at the sailor. Which manner
he has to repress on board ship where the sailor doth retort
,

with calling the soldier a l ub ber an d gives glan ces at him, ,

especi ally in fo ul weather that are not so m uch askance as

,

contemptuous. It has ever been so from the d ays ofLord

—
Clive an d Admiral Watson ay an d long before them to —
m
,

these very days wherein I a writing these l ines an d the war ,

in progre ss in the Crimea with Naval an d Military Of

, fi cers
exhibiting the strictest punctilio in thei r attitude towards
one an other.
All thi s however is neither here n or there an d I m ust get
, , ,

back to my introd uction to Col onel Hastings S urges. He

thanked me for the triflin g attention paid an d we passed into ,

a general conversation when the n ame of the Princess of

,

Wales was mentioned . I think it was I who said Her Royal

—
Highness had sent me to sea an d I saw him change face.
And so he said youknow Her Royal Highn ess
,
’
,

She hath been my kindest Patroness I told him . Indeed ’

,

she saved my li f e when I was a boy from a m urdering villain .

, ,
—
And her household do youknow an y ofthem P ’

I know al l that were of the household at Blackheath .

Mrs. an d Miss Lee Mi ss Garth Mi ss H ammond Mr.
, , ,

An gerstein Mrs. Lisle

,

Did youknow Miss Tempest P he asked interrupting me . ’

,

Ann ette Tempest ? Why yes indeed She an d I were

, ,

pl aymates for a month so far as youcan call a boy offourteen

m
,

an d a girl offi f
’
teen play ates.
128 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
an d the watch as leep on the fo castl e head an d the ship ’

heading al l ways the story ofT he P al ace ofSpies.

,

It was an epi sode in my li fe he said that must ever ,

’
,

rem ain di stinct an d distingu i shed albeit it was but a four ,

months masq uerade . And I a m u mmer who did not kn ow my

’

part— yet played it an d in its playing wrecked my fortune.

,

It came about in this way. I had an Aunt a Miss

m
,

Has tin gs who was as fi n e an old gentlewom an as you ay

,

meet. A very rich wom an who had intention to m ake me ,

her heir. And one d ay as she was taking a walk in Ken sing
,

ton Gardens she was accosted by a l ady who was none

, ,

other than the Princess ofWales.

The Princess witho ut disclosin g her q uality invited my
, ,

Aunt to vi sit that evening at Kensington Palace an d the ,

l atter carried me with her as a protection for her goin g an d

coming. As it happened whilst we were in the Pal ace ,

G arden there came the alarm of a robbery that in stant

,

committed an d the outcry to pursue the thief who was th en

, ,

in the act ofabsconding with the Princess s Diary that he had ’

stolen . In this emergency the Princess revealed hersel f an d ,

my services were requi sitioned to follow the ro bber an d ,

through the in strumentality an d wit ofAnnette Tempest

m
,

who was a young protége of Her Highness I was successful

’

in overtaking hi an d recovering the Diary. But sn fi ered '

the vill ain to escape ignorant that he had also stolen a

,

mini ature to which the Princess attached the greatest value .

My success in securing the papers bro ught me into favour
with the Princess who now comman ded me to try an d
m
,

regain the mini at ure . I a not going to weary youwith the

m
ra ifi cation s of the ensu ing search. Suf fice it to say that it
took me four months during which I came to be very intimate
,

in that Palace of Spies an d so constantly there that I fell

,

in love with Annette Tempest an d incurred the enmity ,

of Lady Sarah Torring ton who was a lady -in waiting to

,

the Princess an d as I di scovered a spy of the Prince of

, , ,
 T HE PALACE OF SPIES 129

Wales to watch his wife. Havin g fi rst entan gled me thi s ,

designing creature ended b y int rig uing to h a ve me or d ered

abroad to the East Indies when thro u

’
gh Annette s help I
, ,

was on t he eve of implicatin g her in the robbery at the

Pal ace an d discovering the actual thief who was a lover
, ,

ofhers.

The very night before I sailed my good fortune enabled

,

me to track the thief to earth an d regain the miniature .

,

That same night the Princess was giving a masq uerad e an d ,

I attend ed it to restore the mini at ure to her. One ofthe

guests at th is m asquerad e was an Ita lian si n ger named Sac ,

charin i with whom the Princess s condu ct had long bee n very
’

m
,

inj udicious an d on this eveni n g she had granted hi an

,

assignation in a secl u ded summer-house.

There was witho ut doubt a plot connected with this
, ,

assign ation in which Lady S arah an d another l ad y of title

,

were concerned an d I verily believe the singer as well . And

, ,

someho w Annette Tempest had di scovered it as the seq u

, ,
el
proved . In attending the assignation the Princess was to ,
"
wear a black domino an d carry in her hand a peacock
,

feather f an to be recognised by it.

m
,

Havin g delivered the iniature to Her Highness an d ,

d ischarged my d uty by opening her eyes to the true character

ofLad y Sarah Torrington she comm anded me to kee w atch
, p
on the latter an d the other l ad y of title who was with her ,

an d a known s y of the Prince 8 . Bef o re I l efi : the chamber

p
where I had been accorded the interview I noticed a peacock ,
’

f eather fan the more partl cul arl y because the Princess tried
,

to hide it furtively .
H aving found Lady Sarah an d her friend in a distant part
ofthe o und s 1 attached myself to them with a hint given

m
g r , ,

( they we re b oth as ked ) th at the ir t rue ch ar acte rs we re d is

covered . This led to an é cl airci ssement ending in Lad y ,

Sarah taunting me with the folly ofmy f idelity to the Princess

m
,

who she decl ared to be a woman unworthy ofrespect an d

m
,

of fered to prove it to e there an d then she bein g actu ,

al l y

9
130 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
on the watch for Her Highne ss to break in on the assign a ,

tion with the other l ady as her witness.

,

Compelled by command ofthe Prin cess to keep touch with

, ,

Lady Sarah I found myselfassociated with her in her watch .

,

Soon was descried a female fi gure carrying a peacock s-feather ,

’

fan an d moving mysteriou sl y in the d i rection of the singer s

'

vil l a which adjcinod the place where the m asquerade was

,

held . We three followed I with my heart in my shoes who

, ,

imagined the Princess had set me to watch an d take custody

ofLady Sarah an d her f riend in order that the way might b
, e

left clear for her to keep the assignation . The female in the
domino tole long to the s mme house an d entered . We
s a u r-
, ,

close on her heel s in the dark fo l lowed her a moment after.

,

There was a scene the singer pretending surpri se an d the

, ,

female with the peacock s-feather fan striving to avoid actual

’

recognition . In thi s pass Lady Sarah withou t having seen ,

her f eatures boldly denounced her as the Princess ofWal es.

,

Whereupon like magic the Princess hersel f appeared at

, ,

the door of the summer hou- se having cleverly o u ,twitted the

spies an d tracked tho se who were su
,
pposed to be tracking
her The denouement resulted in the m ask
’
ed femal e proving
to be Annette Tempest who (as I conceive ) to keep up the
, ,

delusion that she hersel fhad mad e the assignation with the
singer declined my esco rt to extricate her f
, rom a f al se position ,

an d lef t the summer-ho use in the company ofSaccharin i an d

m
,

under the most cruel reproaches f ro the Princess who ,

affected to believe her guilty .

My duty kept me with the Princess an d an hour later , ,

when on the point of parting I implored her to vo uchsafe ,

one word to clear the character of the woman I loved who , ,

in the moment ofher h umiliation had rej ected my support , ,

an d lef t me in a cruel tangle of uncertainty an d bewilde r

ment .
Her Royal Highness ref used ; she even repeated her denun
ciation ofAnnette an d wou ld have me b
, elieve she was capable
ofhaving attended the assign ation with gu ilty purpose : At
134 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
They dragged me of—
f six ofthe the job I memployed at ,

have since been told—an d the venerable Pasco wailing on the

carpet that was very thick an d soft.
,

The little white rabbit was revenged as it had unconsciously ,

been in my mi n d to revenge it al l these years. For a child s ’

memory is the longest memory ofal l .

He deceived me I was crying an d he k il l ed the little
’
, ,

— —
white abbit . And he is a vil lain a villain a villain damn
r ,

him
m
They thought I was ad . Poor old Surges was al ost m
m
bes ide him sel f for that an loved me then almost as m uch
,

as he does now .

Jimmy he cried get sober dear l ad . There are people

, ,

li stening. ’

Let them li sten Let the whole world li sten I shouted .

He killed the little white rab b it I tel l you. I saw it b
,
e

head ed drawn an d quartered ! Oh you devil s ! let me get

, , ,

my hand at his throat again

S urges was asleep in the same room as I when I awakened

m
,

an d the door locked f rom the o u tside ; for I tried it ysel f ,

being in urgent need ofa bucket ofdrinking water. But he

-

snored so com f ortably I had not the heart to ro use him . And
let my mouth go d ry. And l ay a thinking.
-

There was Pasco an d a P al ace full ofglitte r an d chink of

,

gold an d red hot brandy an d fi e shilling counters an d

,
- v -
, , ,

somehow a little white rabbit .

,

I was the little white rabbit.

And Pasco ?
m
Had fled . We were being acco m od ated in P l uto s P al ace
’

or rather in the ho u
, , se in rear of which it was b u ilded .
Surges an d I both sleeping in our clothes of course an d on
, , ,

the floor. And when Surges awakened an d we summoned ,

the people ofthe house who sho uld come an d Open the door
m
,

( th at had been lock ed fro the o utside by S u rge s o rder ) but

’

— Sarah Wells !
 THE PA LACE OF SPIES 135

I recognised her. Heavy though my head was an d dull ,

my brain I recognised the only wom an that had ever shown

m
,

e an love a t a l l tho se years when I was stru ggling th ro ugh

y
my second lustre . And when the poor creature threw her
arm s ro u nd me an d cal l ed me her little Jimmy an d kissed ’

m m
, ,

e an d down on her knees imploring me to spare hi why ’

, ,

a ll w —
I could do as to kiss her back for the sake ofauld lang
syne.

There w as no occasion to pare Pasco an d I be lieve I

s -

sho u ld have been fool enough to do so for Sarah s sake ’

because he had fled ! P l ato s P alace was left without its

’

proprietor an d there was never another stake cal led in it.

,

The croupiers lost their last week s wages an d the landlord ’

,

his l as t quarter s rent because D r. Pl uto was n on est.

’
,

And for me— well Sarah Well s had a tale to unfold .

,

Go to Irel and said she to a pl ace two days distance

’ ’
, ,

from D u blin in a single horse chai se driving the ho rs e as far

-
,

as he can travel . With the su n behind

y ouin the mo rning ,

for Pasco tho u ght the heat would suflocate youin that chest
'

when the sun came round to it . And askabout a gen t l em an s “

son that was kidnapped in the month ofJ u n e 17 95. Ask ,

for a boy named Desmond — I do not know the other name ,

for Pasco wou —

ld never tell it me that was kidnapped seventee n
years ago. It was you Jimmy an d God forgive me that
, , ,

was a silent party to the act .

’

Desmond B essy ?
Y es ; I remembered . And the hou se with the orch ard an d

m
,

,
—
my mother an d my nurse I tell youGod s truth I reme ’
,

bered ! And the be nd in the road an d the soldiers coming ,

i
, a a —
down t n d the w ll on the right behind which Pasco
an d I hid f rom the cru el soldiers an d Pasco butchered the
,

little white rab bit.

It had al l come back to me .
134 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
—
f six ofthem employed
They d gged me of
ra the job I at ,

have since been told—an d the venerable Pasco wailing on the

carpet that was very thick an d soft.
,

The little white rabbit was revenged as it had unconsciously ,

been in my mind to revenge it al l these years. F or a child s ’

memory is the longest memory ofal l .

H e decei ved me I was crying an d he killed the littl e
’
, ,

— —
white rabbit . And he is a villain a villain a villain damn ,

him
m
They thought I was ad . Poor old Surges was al ost m
m
bes ide himsel f for that an loved me then al most as much
,

as he does n ow.

Jimmy he cried get sober dear l ad . There are people

, ,

li stening. ’

Let them li sten Let the whole world listen I shouted .

He killed the little white rabbit I tel l you. I saw it b , e

head ed drawn an d q uartered ! Oh you devil s ! let me get

, , ,

my hand at his throat again

S urges was asleep in the same room as I when I awakened

m m
,

an d the d oor locked f ro the outside ; for I tried it ysel f ,

being in gent need o a bucket o drinking water. But he

ur f f -

snored so com f ortably I had not the heart to rouse him . And
let my mouth go d ry . An d l ay a-thinking.
There was Pasco an d a P alace full ofglitter an d chink of
,

gold an d red hot brandy an d fi ve-shilling co unters an d

,
-
, , ,

somehow a little white rabbit .

,

I was the little white rabbit.

And Pasco ?
H ad fled . We were being accommodated in P l uto s P al ace
’

or rather in the hou

, , se in rear of which it was b u ilded .
Surges an d I both sleeping in our clothes of course an d on
, , ,

the f loor. And when Surges awakened an d we summoned ,

the people ofthe house who should come an d Open the door
,

( tha t had been locked from the outside by S urge s o rder ) but
’

— Sarah Wells !
 C HAPTE R XI
DE OL D FRI EN DS ’

I row Su rges the story of my kidnapping, so f ar as I cou ld

recoll ect it. A f ai rly coherent tale, for my memory , af ter
having lain absol utely dormant for nine years, beca e sudden ]y m
vivid . From the d ay I f ought for the King at Trafalgar I
relinq u i shed al l concern about my father being a rebel an d
ou might almost say had complete f or ot ever having a
g
y
father who was p rocl aim ed .

And now had come this incident ofmeeting Pasco again ,

an d the conf ession ofSarah Well s, an d , as I have told you,
my memory q uickened stran gely . Which same species of
q uickening ha th ha ppened to e in my m
old age , in re l ation
to o ther an d more recen t incidents for I appear to possess a
m
memory so etimes capable ofbeing miraculously refreshed .
And what are yougoing to do asked S urges as we got ,

back to our Inn .

Well said I I have done witho ut a father an d a mother
’

m
, ,

these seventeen years an d a not in so desperate a h urry to

,

o a hu
- nting for them as pe rhap s I ou ght to b F the
g
m
, e,. or

present at least I a determined to stop in London an d

, , ,

my d uty to H er R oyal Highness A n d I hope to see

m
a
p y .

Mistress Win some Lee again an d Annette Te pest .

,
’

Annette Tempest he q ueried l aying some emphasis on

,

her su rn ame I do not think you will . I cannot im agine

.

m
her with the Prin cess af ter thei r l ast parting an y more than
, ,

I can i agine on e so beauti ful still in possession of her

13 6
 DE OLD FRIENDS 13 7

m
m aiden na e . She had a father in France in the service of
m
,

Buonaparte . I have no doubt she j oined h i an d tis , ,

’

possible married a Frenchman .

,
’

We shall see I said for I had no wish to rai se an y false

,
’
,

hopes in him who try how he wo uld to di sgui se it still har

, , ,

boured hope . What are your pl ans

There is my aunt he said Miss H astings an d I feel it
,
’
, ,

my d uty to make inquiries whether she is alive or dead . F or

m
before we ca e to part she was am az ing kind an d generous
to me an d if she is dead why I should wish to vi sit her
, , ,

grave out ofthe respect an d af fection I feel for her memory .

And there is that cousin ofmine George Slee whom I told
m
, ,

ou of the a n like a to . I h ave a mind to renew my

y p
acq u aintance with him . So I shall go down to the Well s

an d m ake inq u i ries an d ift hey come to nothing return to

m
,

town . I have told Bl ood son to see if he can secure e my

ol d l odgings with Mr. D avis the tobacconi st in the Totten

m
, ,

ha Co urt R oad . I shall ce rtainly lodge there if they are

procurable for in addition to com fort an d good cooking you
m
, ,

ay su pply yourselfwith the best pipe oftobacco in London .

Moreover I wish to draw his attention to certain segars
, ,

m ad e in Mani l la of which I have brought home a supply

m
,

th me an d think he a do an extre me prof itable trade in

, y
them can he but obtain them .
,
’

When youreported your arrival at the War Of fice yester

d ay did youhave no reason to expect employment
m
,

From His Royal Highness the Prince Regent an d fro

m
, ,

the Duke ofYork I a too wi se to expect anything.

,
’

Y oumean too proud to solicit anything 7

"
.

Perhaps that 18 so he assented gravely. It was to avoid

,

direct feal ty to the Prince that I desi red to be seconded 1n

my proper regiment an d obtained leave to enter the service
,

ofthe Honou rable Company .

’

The next d ay being the 3 rd ofJann ary Surges left for the
, ,

Well s a journey I did not envy him as he climbed atop ofthe

m
,

co ach that started f rom the Blosso s 1n Lawren ce Lane f or ,

138 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
that winter was the most severely cold known for many years.
Mysel fhad much to do to get my wardro be remedied an d ,

al so to see a su rgeon . Becau se in the carou se of the fi rst

night an d the assault on Pasco the exertion opened an old

, ,

wound an d the cold catched hold ofmy liver an d I was in a

, ,

plaguey bad way when S urges returned on the 5th to f ind

m e in bed at the Inn with his an Bl oodson n u
, m
rsing me who ,

was groaning an d gru nting an d wheez ing like an overfat l ap

dog. It was a sharp attack whilst it lasted but I had a very ,

clever surgeon who blooded me well an d in a few days I

, ,

was recovered .
Wh ile I l ay ill Surges mad e some inqui ries about the
m
,

Princess an d discovered that she had recently re moved fro

,

Kensington Palace or to speak more by the book been

, , ,

e ected by the o rder of her hu

j sba nd to Conn au ght Ho u se, ,

near o pposite to T yburn turnpike which was a residence ,

totally unworthy ofan d derogatory to her high station . F orthe

moment H er Highness was out oftown having gone to Mon ,

t agu e Hou se at Bl ackheath where an entertainment was given

,

on the 7th ofJan uary in honour of the Prin cess Charlotte s ’

bi rthday who had attained her eighteenth year the which is

, ,

her m ajority in a woman . But the D uchess ofLeeds who ,

was governess in charge of the you ng Prin cess would not ,

permit the latter to attend the entertainment on the plea

that the weather was too inclement for travelling to so bleak
an d exposed a pl ace as Bl ackheath ; the real reas on being

that the Prince Regent had sign ifi ed di sapproval of his

daughter enjoying the select bi rthday fete given in her
”

honour b y her own mother !

Bu t for who composed the Princess s present su ite or ’

m
,

were membe rs ofher establi sh ent Surges never learnt it , ,

being one of those men who notwithstanding a certain ,

military superiority are somewhat tongue-tied under circum

,

stances.

Moreover he bad business ofhis own to attend to . His

m
,

au nt M iss Hastings had removed from the Wells to Co

, ,
 TH E Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
Co m
u no ur Hon es,
'

mm
14th Jan uary, 18 14.
DEAR Sa y,
It was vid d o great pleasure I do receive your letter ,

11 l earn ou vas back in E n l an d . Y ou m ust come d is

y g
very evening (at live o clock ) an d dine vid me an d see my ,

t o whom you vas playf ellow ven you vas de

Princess ofV al es leetle boy
‘
m
I a so lad to tin kyou are back again in En l an
Shimmy . I g ope you are not too big for me to cal you
Sh immy still .
”

Touj ours ,

C. P .

P .S.—V in so mi till vid me who do vant to see you

m
e s s ,
"
moch . Come early so dat we ay al l be de old fi aen ds
'

ver ,

before dinner. ’

It was two of the cl ock when thi s letter reached me an d ,

by hal f-pas t four I was arrived at the d oor of Connaught

House .
When my name was demanded an d given I was ushered
m
,

into a small roo that was entered by a door behind the

— m
grand staircase a roo that looked out on to a pretty
garden which ran alongside the Edgware Road an d showed
, ,

by various sign s an d contents the nature ofa lady s boudoir. ’

And a min ute later into this boudoir came a lady , whom I
m ust confess I should have passed in the street witho ut
recogni sin g her for Wi n some L ee .

Seven years had wrought a great di f f

erence in her who was ,

then a gi rl of less than sixteen an d now a young woman of

,

over twenty two . An d the Winsome L ee I saw entering the

-

room was a tall elegant an d gracef

, ul creature with ravishing ,

light gol den hai r an d haz el eyes that ill uminated her with
,

as rare a spi rit as thei r own u niq ue tint an d d e fended her

,

beauty from that lymphatic languor which so often follow s

the blonde . Blond e she was an d yet di splayed the i ron in
,

the blood that belongeth to the bru nette complexion . She

 DE OLD FR IENDS 141

was f
ai r, both in her hai r that so e might have likened to , m
straw in its shade an d her cheek s were a f
, ainter pink th an a

rose which is neither white n or pink . Yet she was of no

neutral or halftint in her moral colourin g for the haz el eyes
- ,

of her as they now sou

, ght mine keenly yet kindly bespoke , ,

her a Wom an ofCharacter.

We stood it might b, e f or a q u arter ofa min u te regard
, ,

in g each other in a m utual am az e trying to remember an d

m
,

reconcile . F or I a tell ou I too had changed ( et in

y , y y , , ,

no wi se improved ) in those seven years ; being now nearl y

six f eet in h eight with shoulders broad an d limbs lumber
,

some f or a sai l o r an d a skin o n me that had no need to go

,

to a tannery had youa fancy to make a purse out ofit For

,

the hot winds ofthe Persian G ul f had ef f ectually d esiccated

an d preserved it . There remained my black hai r that
was still ab undant ; my eyes which some called violet ; my
m
,

n ose that hesitatingly but ulti ately pointed to a better

, , ,

world ; my mouth not too large but held to be the most

, ,

cantankerous in the Bombay Marine ; an d my chin which ( I ,

was once told ) procu red me respect an d obed ience . And

being a sailor home to the girl he had been dreaming of for

,

seven long years in the tropi cs

y ou will pa r don the conceit of ,

thi s d escription ofmy charms.

It was Winsome who spake fi rst .
Are youJimmy i she ask ed . ”

m
Thank God I a I cried an d had her two hands in ’

m
, , ,

mine the next mo ent an d we were boy an d gi rl again wi th

, ,

t he l ittle di stance in ou r distinct breed ing clean f orgot For

I had commanded men in battle an d mixed with the most
m
,

select f e ale society in the Settlement of Bombay of late

years .

How ill you loo k she said . What ai l s you Mr. ‘

,
"
Rabbit P
‘
111 Mistress L ee ! I never f
, elt so wel l in al l my li fe to ,

be met so kindly by you. ’

She dropped her eyes to the carpet.

142 THE QUEEN CAN D O NO WRONG
Y ounever wrote to me she said an d added slyly an d
’
, , ,

I taught youto write sir. ,

’

And ought I to have presumed to do so until you gave

me permission P ’

D id younot get my messages

Wh at messages P ’

Why in every letter that the Princess wrote youi

,
”

I have never received an y letter from Her Highness. ’

And she answered every letter ofyours declared Winsome ,

’

in no small surprise .
She answered every letter ! Ah
My speech was interrupted by the entry ofthe Princess
herself. And in al l my li fe I never experienced such a shock
as I d id at that fi rst sight ofher.

My sen ses were at the moment attuned to the feminine

, ,

—
improved I might almost sayperfected . I had observed my
Mistress Winsome L ee d eveloped from a straying slip of a
schoolgi rl into a wom an ele ant exq u i site an d f
as cin ating .
g , ,

I had seen the beauty ofthe rose in blossom passed from the
stage ofbu dding which displ ayeth the green husk or covering
,

of imm at u rity an d cannot be app reciated at its u

, ltimate
wo rth.
An d now I looked on the blossom ofa woman faded grown ,

—
tawdry hardened an d coarsened youcould not tell whether
,

from some secret canker or f rom too m u

, ch fi erce sun
light .
F or the Princess ofWales had grown as I wou l d not have
had my Lady grow. Now in her f orty-sixth year ; her face
bloated in some degree ; her fi gure corpulent ; her neck that ,

was ever short an d Germ an lost altogether ; her expression ,

careless an d bold . Drest in a crim son velvet robe b uttoned ,

up to the throat its high waist accentuating her physic al

,

defects or to speak more correctly their superabundance ;

, , ,

m uch lace an d many j e wels ; colours ill -m atched ( her fan for ,

instance a cruel orange tint agai n st the crimson background

, ,
,

of her robe) ; her h ai r showing silver thread s in the au burn

144 TH E Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
sion , the shining light ofthe Greenwich vest ry in his old
an d
a e. All thi s I learnt in l au gh ing conve r ation o ousee
g s s
y , ,

we were de old friends again before dinner.

At fi ve o cl ock the Princess led the way to the d rawi n g
’

room where was a small company assembled an d did me the

, ,

hono u r ofintrod u cing me . There was Lady Anne Hamilton

m
,

dressed like a ad Chinese (as I overheard a lady whi spe r "

in con fi d en ce to a friend ) ; Mi ss Garth who had formerly ,

been governess to the Princess Charlotte a very quiet an d ,

gentle creature ; Lady Charlotte Campbell a brilliant ,

woman who wrote a brilliant book in af

, ter years The ,

Court o M . Gell Mr. C raven

“
nd u
f gE n l a n de r Geor e I
g r , ,

an d one or t wo others. I was made somethi n g ofa h ero f or ,

reasons which I need not s eci f y an d Lady Anne H amilton

p ,

who was sister to the D uke of Hamilton an d a D ragoness of ,

V i rtue but a mi schie f-making hysterical creat ure ( twas

, ,
’

she who w rote a ve ry e vil inaccurate book T he S ecret

m
, ,

H ist y o u su
f h C f g E i d th t pp essed )
’
t e o rt o n a n a w as r ,

Lad y Anne tro ubled me more with atten tions than ever
m
did the Joas i pirates or the French privateers with thei r
inten tions !
A little l ater arrived the Princess Charlotte attended by ,

the D u chess of Leeds a sour-looking old Dowager very

, ,

u ,
-
h ghty an d her assistant governess Miss Knight. (She too
a , , ,

hath wro te a boo k so yousee the intellectual company I was

,

g otten into the mid st o f The P rincess sa l u ted h er mother

with a cold formality that was not pleas ing an d I noticed: ,

her m anner hurt Her R oyal Highness who tookLady C har

m
,

lotte Campbell s ar an d retired to the fi repl ace over which

’
,

she bent as if to w arm her hand s the weather being bitter ,

cold an d the room large an d ill -heated ; but really to hide

,

the imp u lsive tears that had leapt into her lids. A little
later when she had recovered her composure she came up to
, ,

me an d taking my hand in that swee t protecting unassum

, , , ,

ing way of hers which she ever d i splayed toward s her

,

Charity Boys led me to her daughter.

,
’
 DE OLD FRIENDS 145

Charley she as ked do youremember d is gentleman

,
’
,

The young Princess looked at me. She was a bon nie gi rl ,

with the Guelphic eyes an d cast ofcountenance (I have seen

it re peated in some ofour gracious Q ueen V ictoria s daughters ’

w ith a startling similitu de) an d a charming variety of

,

ex pressions ch as ing each other over f

,
eatures that m ust have
been accoun ted pretty an d full ofsensibility in a ny station of
life . Her arm s an d hand s were fi t to be sculptured but she
m
,

had too early inherited her mother s f ailing namely e b

’
an , ,

oin t an d her fi gure was almost th at ofa n u rsing mother.

p ,

Moreover her skirt might have been three to fo ur inches

m
,

longer ( I a informed yet do not hold it as my own opinion)

,

with improvement even though she was admitted to have as

m
,

p retty ankles as ever a an clapped eyes on .

She looked at me royally the way that a King looks at a

cat that look s at him .

Who is it she snapped .

m
Do younot reme ber Shimmy Rabbit d at u sed to act as ,

yo ur page at Margate
What she cried the little boy whose leg was broke by
,

the Highwaymen An d instantly her m anner changed an d ,

with an impulsiveness truly inherited from her mother she ,

gave me her hand (the prettiest I ever ki ssed savin g on e of , ,

cou rse ) an d when I wou

, ld have ki ssed it ( which I did later)
wrun g it with a hearty good shake so that I could not carry ,

my hom age into ef fect an d told me she was delighted to see

m
,

what a fi n e handsome an the littl e Devil s Shrimp had ’

grown into
It was very embarrassing but I attempted to laugh it of
, f ,

an d she called Win som e to come an d j oin u s an d compell ed ,

her an d me to sit on a sof a with her hersel fin the mid dl e

m
, ,

an d d id d o the matchmak er with al l the consu mate skill of

a mother of seven m arri ageable dau ghters. Letting out to
me with an artful heartlessn ess an d m uch to Winsome s con
, ,
’

f usion al l that the l atter had said ofme on various times an d

,

occas ions from 1802 up to the present year of grace an d ,

10
146 THE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
givin g me a cl ue that I snatched at an d hugged to my bosom
in silent j oy an d am az ement.
Our conversation was interrupted by the arrival of the
Princess Sophia sister to the Prince R egent. Th is Princess
,

was in no way k indly di sposed to H er R oyal Highness an d ,

her presence there in conj u

, n ction with the D uchess ofLeed s ,

intended as an act ofrestraint on the mother ofthe Heiress

to the Throne an d her daughter for whom the strictest
,

o rders had been i ssu ed that she an d her mother should never
exchange a single word that was not overheard by those in
charge of the yo unger. M uch to Her R oyal Highness s ’

chagrin no sooner had the Princess Sophia arrived than the

,

Princess Charlotte attached herselfto her Aunt until dinne r ,

with only a word spared now an d then for her ol d governess ,

Mi ss Garth .
At the table the Princess Charlotte was seated next her
mother an d I was but two pl aces d i stant from them an d
,

could overhear their conversation . T he which was a con

tin ued l amentation on the part ofthe Prin cess ofWales at the
way the world treated hersel fan d her dau ghter ; an d more
especi ally some cutting remarks intend ed no doubt to reach
, ,

the Prince Regent s ears ofhow the country had been d is

’
,

appointed in the Promotions Em ancip ations an d Rej oicin gs

m
, ,

that under a more worthy régv e m ust have heralded the

'

, ,

coming ofage ofthe on l y child ofthe Heir Apparent .

- -

Oh but the War an d the great expenses of the Nation

, , ,
’

protested the Princess Charlotte these are the reason s why

,

the celeb tion

ra of - f
my coming o age is deferred for the
-
’
present.
An d are youchild eno u gh to believe that retorted the
Princess of Wales scornfully . And then added Never
,

believe a single word your father says ; for he cannot speak

the truth . ’

And with that turned her bl ue eyes boldly an d d efi an tl yto

the Princess Sophia an d the Duchess ofLeeds.
u w h n —
Th s as t e Co flict carried forward the Con flict that had
 COLONEL SURGES

I it was the very next morning that there came a letter

TH I N K

for S u rges f rom his Au nt Hastings as king him to go do wn

m
,

to Pen z ance to see her as soon as the weather per itted . At

this time the whole co untry was bound in frost an d buried in
snow an d a j o u
, rney to Land s End almost beyond the bou nds
of possibility . But nothi n g would content him except to
start of f at once to pay his d uty to his relative. Seeing him
so determined I , gave him a bit ofsailorly advice — n amely to
,

travel it by sea. For thi s he was so thank ful that by way of

repaying the obligation b e in stalled me in his lodgings which

m
,

he had secured in the Tottenham Court Road with his an,

Bl ood son to look af ter me d u ring his ab sence.

Thi s was comforting to my necessity for beyond a pension
,

of ninety pou nds a year an d a hundred guineas saved up

,

priz e-money I had no re sources but was told at L ead en hal l

, ,

Street the Honourable Cou rt intended to bestow on me some

su itable appointment connected with the supervi sion of thei r

shipping at the d ock s. So that youmight say I was neither
harassed with the prospect ofpoverty n or wealth .
I tol d Surges about Annette Tempest an d how she was
,

expected back at Connaught House in the mi d dl e ofFebruary;

an d althou gh he m ade no reply at the moment he did pre
,

sen tl let d rop a re m ark that he shou ld not extend his vi sit
y
to Penz ance b eyond the tenth of the next month . And I
understood .
 C OL O NE L SURGE S 149

Shal l I tell Her R oyal Highnes s youare in England I

as we drove to the Pool where his craf
aske
d him ,
t,
was
anchored an d at some danger f
, rom the ice that was f as t

form ing on the surface ofthe river.

Do as youpleas e an d as youthink best said he only do ’

m
, , ,

not consult me . I a no person to say yea or n ay in ”

so d elicate a m atter. Y ou k now my story . Y ou are my

dear friend . I trust you as I love you Jimmy . I would ,

rather tru st u th n my sel fin thi s cas e . ( Y u he co ul’

d
m
y o a o see

come down fro those military stilts of his on occasions ;

other times I have known him swear a sailor had neither
sen se n or sen sibility .)

I shall use my j udgment said I the last thing before we

,
’
,

p arted .
Y ou m ust not suppose that whilst these m atters were
happening I had forgot the one matter which should be
greater than an y other— namely the di scovery ofmy parents
, ,

or at least of my parentage . Bu
, , t the middle of Irelan d
where I took my bi rthplace to be situated was a long —
distance the j ourney expensive the weather o utrageous
, , ,

coaches al l over the country being snowed up an d the m ail s ,

sent f orwards by postilions on horses ; even Canterbury cut

of ff rom the metropoli s on Jan n ary 2 l st f or three d ays ; an d

the passengers in the Ban bury coach which became enti re ,

buried only escaped at the haz ard of their lives on foot an d

, ,

several times u to thei r chin in sn ow bef o re they rea ched

p
Wolvercot .
An d — well there was Connau
, ght House open to me an d ,

Winsome L ee to b e seen an d spoken to . So I def erred my

q uest to a more clement season ofthe year when it might be ,

accompli shed at an easier cost to my health which was none , .

too good an d to my purse which was none too heavy .

, ,

Her R oyal Highness wi th her characteri stic kindness of

,

heart had extended to me an open invitation to visit at Con

,

naught House whenever I felt inclined . Thi s was n aturally , ,

d aily ; b ut I was wise enough to curb my inclinations. Wi se I ,

150 THE Q UEEN CAN D O NO WR ONG
mya
y in
sa my
, own i n terests for ou u
y ,st unde m
rstand I had

fallen clean an d deep in love with Win some an d to see her ,

d ily would have been putting my powers ofsel frestraint to

a -

too great a test . Twice a week I made it an d wou ld like to

,

have asked her to be my wi fe at the third visit ( no sailor being

slack at wooing .
) An d the dear thing in fo rmed me ( l ate r) sh e

would have accepted me at the second had I but of fered mysel f

Shall I ever forget that thi rd visit ? It was in thi s way.
I m ade a morning call ofit or rather a morning assignation
,

in Hyde Park . I had in formed Winsome my health req uired

p urer air th an was to be found in the Totten ha Court Road m ,

not wi thstanding its f ragrant flowery breez es b l owin g f

,
rom

the fi el d s an d nursery -grounds over beyond Pancras an d

Gower Streets. My surgeon ( I said ) recommended the air of
Hyde Park as particularly sal ubrious for my complaint an d ,

likewise the water ofa certain ell in its north west corner
w -

m
,

used with advan tage to b athe bad eye s ( ine bei n g somewhat

afflicted with ophthalmic weakness contrac ted in the Pers i an

Gulf) . Well Win some declared her interest in the curative
,

properties ofthat well an d was delightful enough to say she

,

would accompany me thither one morning an d observe its ,

miracles for hersel f. I was to promenade j ust behind the

parapet wall with its i ron railing ofHyde Park opposite to
, , ,

Con naught House an d she to join me . The which she did

, ,

not i ssuing by the front -d oor but by a cunni n gly contrived

m
,

little side -door ( that you ay see to thi s d ay) which coul d
m
tell any a tale d id it di sclose the people who had stole
through it after nightfall an d under what circumstances !
,

Ou thi s particular occasion it was eleven of the f orenoon ,

an d Win some the person who slippe d ou t like a b are f ,rom

its f orm . And j oined me a little further down by the gate ,

beyond St.George s buri al -ground . And so to the rem arkable

’

well I blinking more perhaps than was necessary ; but the

, , ,

hair an d eyes ofher were as d az z ling as the sun shine on the

rippled green waves of the Persian Gu l f or the m oonl ight
,

ray s on its yello w furrowed sands.

152 T HE QUEEN CAN D O NO WR ONG
s ide her little dainty lace handkerchiefwhipped out plumped
, ,

into the water an d applied to my eyes.

,

The cure was complete. She even acknowledged it hersel f ,

whilst con fessing violet-coloured eyes were weak an d b ad for ,

seeing with .

But they saw her f ace well eno ugh as she said it !
T hen there was another d ay —
y fi fth vi m
sit I think — an d ,

it was d ull an d foggy with the frost freez ing the smoke as it
thawed the atmosphere about the chimney tops. We were
sitting by the fire in the little room that was called the Bl u e
Boudoi r. Who sho uld come in but Lady Anne Ha ilton m ,

who was a gad -fly to me ; an d begin with herhystericks. And

had I really killed eighteen en P m
An d did thei r ghosts
never haunt my dreams ? An d did my soul approve War ?
And was I aware ofthe cost ofWar to the Nation ? An d
what ofthe National Debt an d the price ofO nium Stock
, m ,

an d the increasing expendit u re of the Chancello r of the

Excheq uer ? And how could I abu se B u onaparte ? Sure

m
,

was he not the greatest an that ever lived ? An d ifhe

b egan the Great Wars with his Ultimatums was he not ,

fi ghtin g f or liberty an d f
reedom Did not the D utch do the
same an d gain the world s respect ?
,
’
I tell you that woman ,

was a trifle i rritating that was pro-French when the French ,

were anxious to cut our throats an d drive us out of E uro pe

an d I rel and . And what was a m u
, ch worse crime she drove ,

Winsome out of the Boud oir with her politics ( tis the ’

weakest side m ust ever argue the loud est) an d me left to ,

listen to her d amnable chatter.

I m ust be going Mad am says I . ’

m
, ,

An d she : Oh b ut I a only j ust come into the room .

,

Would youmake so m arked a di splay ofyour ill breeding -

to leave me within the halfhour

-

Within the hal f-second Madam says I for I have no ’

m m
, , ,

breeding . I a but a charity boy . I f my m anners see

ru d e to you put it do wn to my rude bi rth . And fled .
m
’
,

I n the hal l was Win some waiting f or me as it see ed .

,
 C OL O NEL SUR GE S 15

This way she whispered an d carried me to the House

,
’
,

keeper s room .
’

And oh we had a splendid warming ofour feet an d hands

m
,

over the Housekeepers fire An d some pass g pleasant j est

’
.

ing an d conversation . And decided Lady Anne Hamilton was

a m ad m agpie t hat had learnt the Engli sh tongue.
All thi s time My Lady Kind an d Bountiful was gracious
to me but natheless a little distant. I cannot tell you for
m
, , ,

why though I ay suspect it. She had asked me Do you

, ,

fi n d me changed Shimmy an d my an swer had been to ki ss

,

her hand . She did not completely f orgive me that silence for

An d or S u
f
now rges affai rs. I too k Win some into my
”

con fi d en ce, so far as I might , an d kept my word to S urges.

She knew nothing of the episode of the Palace of Spies,

having been at school when it occurred . But this she d id
know, that Annette Te pest had refused m any of m fers of
m
m arriage, several ofthe the Prin cess s own arranging ; an d ’

the Princess never angry with her but only extraordinarily ,

sad . Which seei n g what a sel fi sh woman she was where

,

other women were concerned was remarkable .

m
,

It was not for me to tell Winso e the story my friend had

con fi d ed to me u nder the tropic moon an d stars in one of
m
,

those phases oflife when the garmen t fall s fro the soul an d ,

it stand s forth naked an d not ashamed . Moreover it was ,

not a clean m atter I coul d mention to Winsome . And yet I

h ad the will to do my f rien d a good tu rn . F or I loved

Has tings Surges even though he was a soldier an d had al l a

,

soldier s fau lts.

’

In this pass I determined merely to mention the fact that

S urges had come home on the same ship with me ; that we
were dear friends ; an d that he was shortly returning fro m
Penz ance whither he had gone to vi sit a rel ative . And I
,

al so observed he had once enjoyed the hono u r ofthe Princess s

’

acq u aintance.

I have heard ofhim said Winsome ; he was the gallant

’

,
 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
g
e ntlem an th at pu rsued a th ie fwho had com itted a robbery m
it Kensingt on Pal ace .
’

m
That is the an said I ,
’
.

Annette Tempest knows him she said . ’

m
,

Does she speak ofhi P I asked . ”

No . Outhe contrary she dislikes to speak ofhim . But

m
,

he lik es to hear hi spoke of

’
s .

How d o youknow that I asked in some surprise .

m
She is a girl an d I a a girl . An d I kn ow. Because we
,

—we have con fi d en ces.

’

Mistress Lee said I ifyoucan bring those two together

’

—do ao.
, ,
’

I is dif
" ‘
ficul t she said b
’
ut to please you Shim y I will m
m
, , , ,

y
T . I ea n M r. Rabbit .
”

So I had a piece ofnews for Surges when he returned fro m

Penz ance with the deplorable n e ws that his aged Aunt had
Jeen ru ined by that rascally cousin ofhis an d Lad y Sarah ,

1n d that S u rges was necessit ated to m ake her an al lowance

For the rest ofher natu ral li fe to enable her to keep herself
m
,

n that station to which she had been accusto ed . F or she

was living in a small cottage with b ut one young aid to , m
attend u pon her al l her fortune having been devoured by
,

that c u n ning wom an . Surges returned on St . V alentine s ’

Day an d held it to be a good omen . When I told him my

,

1ews he m ade no rem ark but I noted the flushing ofhis

m
,

1an d so e face an d it told its own tale .

m
,

And true enough Wi n some acco plished it being not on ly ,

1 g reat f avo urite of the Princess b ut one of those youn g ,

women who are constitu ted to get their own way. And as a
esu l t there came an invitation f or both ofu s to dine at
“

Con nau ght Ho use on the 22 n d February ; the one to myself

wrote by Winsome the other to S u
, rges by H er Royal High
ness in her own hand with the spelling after her own
,

Germ n Engli sh f
a - ashion .
Surges showed me the letter ; it was in a manner formal , ,
. 56 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
n flicted a urther
f
defeat the despatches boasting of
,

irison ers 10 can non an d 10 stand ofcolou

, , rs captu red an d a ,

ast n u mber ofthe enemy killed . And the hopes which had
'

1eg u n to germ inate that Napoleon s long d ay was dying ’

m
, ,

vere shattered f or the f ortieth ti e an d the faces in the

m
,

J on d on streets gloomy an d f ull of f oreboding with en ,

iratin f th t Devil who can n ot be destroyed nd th t ’

g o a a a ,

verl astin
g ever- tri umph
, ant an el of evil an d
g tha t G r ea t ,
”

l east predicted in R evelation s an d investing him with

’
,

upern atural lif e an d powers.

Conceive then the wild gust of delirious j oy that burst
m
, ,

r o London when it was announced that B uonaparte was

lead b ,ut whether in battle or by assassination no one could
ay. The new s had been f orwarded by telegraph from Dover ,

l aying b een prom ulgated there by a (pretended) foreign

fiicer who called him sel f Colonel de Burgh . A tall d ark
m
1
, , ,

b earded an dressed in scarlet an d gold the coat turned

, ,

w ith green a star on his breast an d a long sword at his side .

, ,

it Dover he hired an express to carry him to London with ,

n ten tion as he gave ou

, t to d rive to Down ing Street direct
, ,

n d hand h is desp atches to the Mini sters Previous to start .

he wrote to Admi ral Foley anno uncing the Death of

n
g ,

Japol eon an d the hoi sti n g of the Bourbon stand ard in

,
‘
I
ran ce . And then started in his express lavi shing gold
’
,

Lapol eon s on the way ( with which his pocket s were f illed ) ,

ven at the turnpikes H is hurriedly told story was that he

.

ad been l anded between Dover an d Deal by an Open bo at ,

11d in testimony he showed his f ine new uni f orm al l wet an d ,

tain ed with the spray ofthe sea that beat over the boat as
b e gro u nded . ’

Well he never got to London in the flesh only his news

, , ,

r hich set the Stock Exchange in a bustle in stantly an d sent ,

) mni u m up from 27 § to 33 with not less than halfa million

,

b e rling changed hands. An d someone m ade a fortune .

It was in short a base fraud practi sed upon the Stock
m
, ,

E xchan ge an d although we ay laugh at it now an d at

, ,
 COLONEL SURGE S 157

o urselves who were gulled it was no laughing atter but

, m ,

one ofhuge rej oicin g an d impo rtan ce that Tu esday af

ternoon
when S urges an d I went to dine at C onn aught House . The
Princess Charlotte was there come to gossip over the
,

startling intelligence with her mother ; f or the end of the

war promi sed her early m arri age . And there was the greatest
m
excitement an d exultation over thi s a az in g news at the very
moment when we were ushered in .
It was on the whole a thankful circumstance for Surges
, , ,

for it prevented that n atu ral ak ard n ess that m ust have

otherwise ari sen from this renewal of his hom age to the
Princess. B uonaparte dead ! The Monster assassinated !
The Bloody V illain laid l ow with a bullet in his own V ital s
R ighteo us retri b
ution Such was the chorus ofbuz z ing con
versation in the d rawing-room as we entered an d Surges was ,

received by H er R oyal Highness an d her hand ki ssed an d

, ,

then he an d I told to seek Ann ette whilst the Princess turned

,

to continue her conversation .

An d now came Winsome an d took us into the back draw
m
,

in g -roo where behind the shelter of the heavily -draped

, ,

curtains stood Annette grown a beautiful an d elegant young

m
, ,

woman . But very pale an d tre bling with her so ft violet ,

eyes flutterin g in a frightened suspense . And fi rst she shook

hand s with me an d then bo ed low to Surges b
,
w — o wed as

she had bowed ( he told me) in her domino an d tasselled

sandal s to the Princess of Wales one nigh t three an d a half

And Surges drew him self up very erect an d in that , ,

st il ted mili tary style of his returned her how . And there
,

passed the glance between them of two proud soul s neither ,

ofwhom wou ld make the fi rst advance .

m
It was Winso e with her Winsome ways that brought us
, ,

al l together.

I s not Shimmy grown P she as ked ofAnnette treating me

”

m
,

to the Princess s name which was so etimes done out of

’

m
,

co pliment to Her Highness an d friendly kindness to me.

158 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
An d Annette looked me up an d down , an d into my eyes,
with a puz z led expression on her face, an d breaking into a
s mile .
I do hardly recogni se you Mr. Rabbit she said . Y ou
”

m
, , ,

had a girli sh f ace an d a pale co plexion d —

now why
m
a n , ,

dear e youare as bronz ed as youare big sir ! And I shall

, ,

not be able to bully you like I did d uring that summer holi
day at Montag u e Ho use . Do youremember it i ”

Remember it I cried . With you an d Mi stress L ee

f m pl ym te Co uld I eve f
o et th t golde
m
or
y a a s ! r rg a n

onth P ’

L a Mas ter Shimmy she cried ou have learnt to be

’
, y , ,

q uite the courtier in your travels. And yet she flashed

a gl ance at S u s a good thing sometimes to f

’
r es
g ti ,
’
orget .

I agree with you put in Surges gravely so long as your

,
”
,

dictum does not apply to persons.

’

The application is f ou to m ake Colonel Su rges she

’
or
y , ,

told him .
May I make it asked Winsome sweetly .
They both looked at her inq uiringly .
Y ou can neither ofyouf orget each other she d eclared ”
,

au daciously an d younever wil l . ’

,

The sweet salt speech ofa sailors lass I cried with some
,
’
,
’

enth usias m an d not in the b

, est tas te . Bu t I was anxiou s to

help her in the tas k she had un dertook .

Ind eed sir said Winsome to e I prefer the military .
,
’
, m ,

Sailors sail away an d leave thei r lasses f or too long a time

al together.
’

Why was I not m ade a soldier P I cried . I fBoney is ’

dead there will be no more wars an d no more soldiers ,

wanted . ’

’
Soldiers are always wanted declared Winsome with a , ,

rogu i sh look at Annette .

And sailors groaned I .
’
I declare I love sailors said Annette taking my side , ,

sud den ly .
160 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
ra si ing her voice so that everyone could hear ( she stammered
a little like her f
, ather the Prince R egent)
,

I th -think the Per-prince of O range so ug-ugly that I

m
,

sometimes a obliged to te turn my head away in disgust

-

when he is ta- talking to me. I will n ever marry him . But

ar — -
m ry I will an d de directly in order to enjoy my liberty .
,
’

Your liberty echoed her mother grimly . My dear ,

dere is a species ofliberty d at is too dearly bo ught ven you

m m
,

pawn your person for it ! And reme ber d at who soever

y oum arry vill become you r King as vell as yo ur u sban d an d
’
,

y o u vill g if him d c powe r ove r you .

’

My King ! Pho pho cried the Princess Charlotte

,

scorn f ully an d drawing hersel fup to her f ull height in her

m
,

seat . Never ! The an I marry will on ly be my fi rst

su bj ect never my King. ’
,

Bravo bravo cried the Prin cess of Wales cl apping her

, ,

hands. D at is de spirit of de House of Brunswick . Y ou

m
have inherited dat fro me not from d at S chwein ehun d ,

And she glared at the Duchess ofLeed s whose duty it was ,

to report everything spoke here to the Prince at Carlton

House .
The Duchess bent over to the Princess Charl otte an d
whispered something into her ear which brought a flash ,

into the gi rl s eyes. But she retorted nothing an d for the

’
,

rest ofthe meal wo u ld not open her lips.

The evening passed d ully enough . There was a little
m usic in the d rawing -roo m
but a tone of ill -temper had
,

settled on the three great l adies an d it h u shed the rest of

,

us. It was not until H er Highness curtly ordered the

Princess Charlotte s carriage to b
’
e brou ght an d the latter ,

had departed very su , lky that S urges obtained a word with

,

ou r hostess.
m
I a great]y glad to see you Colonel Surges she said to, ,
’

him an d ifyouhaf de leisure an d de inclination yby you

m
, , ,

as ]! co e here every S u nday as youused to do in de old d ays

m
, ,

ven
y o u va s
y b rafe caval ier in Ken sin ton Pal ace .
g
’
 COLONEL SURGES 16 1

Y ouhon our me M ad am —
,an d yo mke me h ppy
u a a
’
, said

Surges.
"
I is
‘
I vi sh to do she replied ifyouvill only believe
z at ,
’
,

it. So I sall l ook to see you. Shimmy vill tell youI n efler
'

f m m
orget y friends. I haf known hi tree times so long as I
hafknown you.
’

She gave me her hand an d as it l ay on the back ofmine

,

ki ssed it pressed with her fi n gers. A triflin g act

m
,

but it spake f ro her kind an d Gracious heart to

min e .
 CH APTER XIII

I S UCC EED T O MY HERI TAGE

WE L L it is time that I forged ahead with my story d f

m
, , an or

S urges let me mention an d dis iss the topic for the prese nt
m
, ,

that he ad e his course with a slanting sail d rawin g well ,

eno ugh al l through the mon th of M arch an d into April on ,

—
the 11th of which the very day by the same token the, ,

tidi n gs arrived ofthe entry of the allied Powers into Pari s ,

an d the abdication ofB u onaparte ; with al l London drun k

from j oy if not f
, ro m
wine an d illuminations that complete
,

s f —
extingui hed the lustre o the stars I m ade a start for
I rel and f or to di scover who I was ifthat mystery were to be
,

f o und out.
I left Win some with a d iscontented heart there being no ,

word oftroth exchanged between us. F or what was I to d o?

A pen sion of ninety pou n ds a year with the promi se of a

m
,

post so soon as it should be vacant to bring e another

, ,

hundred with the necessity to lod ge at Wapping was no

, ,

li fe to translate this girl to who had been bred up in a

m
,

Palace atmosphere . H er mother ( I should have entioned )

m
was now a con fi r ed invalid an d not expected to su
, rvive
long ; an d on her death there was l ittle or nothing to come
m
to Win so e who m ust provide for hersel f by a prudent
,

m arriage . Which one with me could not be esteemed by

an y m anner of eans. m
[ m
S urges was not quite as advan ced in his suit as I . Y ou
] 2
 164 THE Q UEE N CAN DO NO WRONG
very thing I was seekin g for what should he come across but ,

an ol d printed bill on the which was set f

orth , ,

FI V E H U N D RE D PO U N DS REWARD.

L ost or trepa/n n ed , a b m D md T m
oy n a ed
p t es on e es , ag e d

fi b
l ac k hair b
lu d rett n ice

mm d m m m
ve ears, y
e e es
y p ver an
y , ,y

m
arvel l o s ly u d isa d f T w esto an d
m
a/r e re pp eare ro
, p e n ,

u d h b stolen b i The b
a ove reward
m
to
m
s e a ve een
y gyps es.

wil l b id to who soever shal l g ive inf i n that le ads

m m
e
pa or t o
to his recovery. Apply to D es on d T e pest, Esquire, o f
’
T anpestown .

I tell youI was queasy . F or I knew in a flash ofinspira

tion or awaken ed recollecti on that I was Desmond Tempest
, ,

And there in stantly came to me the thought ofAnnette an d ,

her singu lar likeness to me !

By God ! I tell youI was queasy an d my new -made f ien d
m
r ,

had to f e tch me a noggin ofru ( which I ever fancied over

your fashionable brandy being a ore honest an d seamanlike , m
l iquor A dram indeed has started me fi ghtin g again when
. , ,

none thought there was the ability left in me And now

it did me a great service an d mad e a new an of me again , m ,

as I requ ired to b e who was no longer J immy Rabbit at al l

, ,

at al l .
m
T e pestown ( I f
o und l
) y a some sixty o d d mile s so uth
west of D ublin an d I hi red a post-chai se to take me
,

there. Twas a poor road even for an Iri sh one an d ran

‘
, ,

throu gh a hilly an d beautiful country an d it took me two ,

days to traverse it. I cannot tell youwhat sen t me there

m
,

except that it was a sort of instinct ; for y friend at

Morrison s hotel advi sed me to put my af
’
f
ai rs in the hand s of

an attorn ey an d l ay proper legal siege to my rightf

, ul in
heritan ce . But no I was obstinate an d would not listen to
, ,

his advice. I had a mighty great longing to see the place

with my own eyes for I was conscious that my memory was
m
,

a wak en in . O n y journey hither I had remembered in ci

g
 I SU CCEE D TO MY HE RITAGE 165

dents ofmy j ourney hence eighteen years before ; the woman

in the coach who gave me an o range the di spute Pas co had ,

with the owner ofthe chaise when he had been compelled to

a
p y a co u ple of g uineas co pen m
sation an d the very wo rd s he ,

had taught me to say My f ath er is dead an d my mother is

, ,

dead an d my name is J immy Rabbit an d thi s is my uncle

, , ,

D r. Pasco who is takin g me to be schooled . And now ifit

’
, ,

were as I surmised an d I was Annette s brother I knew that ’

m
, ,

my mother an d father real ly were dead an d that it was y ,

f ather s brother who held the estate th at was entailed an d

’
, ,

mine by right of succession . It did not concern me to

mention it earlier but Annette s father was one oftho se who
,
’

peri shed in the retreat f rom Moscow in which campaign he ,

held a high comm and in Buon aparte s cavalry . ‘

Early in the aftern oon ofthe second d ay my chai se arrived

at some cross-road s an d the postilion inf or ed me One m
m
, ,

moile sor an d we ll rache T i pistown . Upon which the

, ,
’ ’

thought came to me to walk thi s last mile an d descending

m
, ,

from the chaise I to l d the , an to f ollow me an d footed it ,

down the road .

An d had not proceeded hal fa mile when I came to a lane
that ran up on the right between two stone walls an d some
, ,

thing ind uced me to stop an d contempl ate it. And still a

l ittle further an d came a bend in the road an d a stone wall ,

on the left an d I stop ped an d contempl ated that too .

m
, ,

An d looking there came to y lips unbidden the word s

, , , , ,

P oor l ittl e white rab bit

I walked on three hundred yards past another bend an d , ,

su
—
dden ] y there opened an orchard the orchard I remembered
playing in as a child . An d adj oining it y ho e. All in an m m
instant I recognised it an d could have sworn to it.
,

U p to the doo r I strode an d rang the bell an d knocked

,

l oudly as though I had b

, ee n m aster o f the p l ace . An d
there came a pretty little Iri sh col leen to open it an d asked ,

me my business.
Who s master here I as ks.
’
16 6 T HE QUE E N CAN DO NO WR ONG
S ure then says she tis Mister Tim T i pist.
, ,
’
,
’
m ’

I want to see him says I . ,

’

Why then you can t says she for he s closeted wid a ’ ’ ’

m
, , , ,

st ran e ou ld in tl e nd is as m uch s me waa es are

’

g g an a t a g ,

worru th to di stu rb him .

’

And what s the strange ould gin tl e an s name honey i I

’
m ’
,
”

asked her d ropping into my native brogu

, e quite naturally.
Tis a D octhor Pasco say s she.
’ ’

m
,

Pasco scream s I then take e there at onst ,

But she said she couldn t f or twas as m u ch as her waages ’ ’

,

were worruth.

Notwith standing I was in the room with him an d Tim

m
,

T i pist that was my b , ad u ncle under the two min utes an d , ,

the door locked an d Pasco co wering in the corn er praying

m
, ,

y unc l e to save him f rom being m u rther ed in co uld b l ood .

( The I ri sh t h rickof s
pa che ret ur n s to me y e will be noticing ) , .

It happened I had a double -barrelled pistol in my pocket

( it w as Win s ome wi shed me to carr y one me going into a ,

dangerous country like Ireland ) an d I whipped it out. ,

Y e rabbit -m assacring vill ain I roared at Pas co so I ve

’
,

got ye at last have I

m
,

What does al l thi s ean P dem ands my uncle . Who is ”

this riotous fellow

m I
’
Desmond Tempest says I an d the rightful Mas ter ’

fT m
, ,

t w
m
o es o n
p e

Desmond Te pest he gasps an d his face goes the ,

colour offat pork . Then looking round viciousl y at Pas co ,

What s thi s you d og ? Y ou never tol d me you had tol d

’

m m
,

hi . What d ye ean by tricking me out ofmy money

’

I never told him cried Pasco . I swear to Heaven I d o

not kno w how he has fo und out. Unless it was that cursed
wench S arah
Y ourogu e I shouted at him . Do youthink I was ever
going to forget the little white rabbit that you b utchered
there behind the w all down the road where I ve j ust passe d P
, , ,
’
168 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO W R ONG
what a compromising documen t it was. And being in a
desperate pass he began to show some spunk an d try
, ,

blustering.
And who are youP asks he who d ares to come to my ’
,

ho use an d threaten an d brow beat me like this P

- ’

The Master ofT e pestown says I . m ,

’

That has got to be proved says he an d meanwhile get ,

’
,

ouou f u ’

y t o my ho se.

T is you who ll be glad to fly ou t presently says I an d

‘ ’ ’

m
, ,

swings the pi stol round towards hi .

Y ou scoundrel he cries would you m urder an ol d
m
,

an
Y es, y I as soon as look at him ifit was you. And
’
sa s , ,

faith ! shooting s q uicker out ofyour pain than being sen t

’

to Botany Bay as you r accompli ce D r. Pasco here can te ll

, , ,

you.
’

Who ll send me to Bo tany Bay P he asks

’ ’
.

Why the L aw will .

,
’

What for P ’

F or robbing of
”
me my estate.
6

Who was kidnapped by thi ogue in 1796 an d a reward s r ,

of£500 of fered for my recovery . Maj or Sirr at Dublin has

tol d me al l abo ut it an d shown me one ofthe bills an d
, ,

an d ( the tho ught cro ssed my mind very p )

at the re s
’

Sarah Well s to prove who kidnapped me an d bring it home ,

to you. ’

Heaven s curse on her ej aculated Pasco in a ortifi ed

’
, m
tone that convicted him self.
Who s Sarah Wells asked my uncle keenl y addressing
’
,

the question to Pasco .

She s the wom an who had charge of me when Pasco
’

carried me away from here . The woman who knows who I

was an d can give evidence ifit is necessary . Bu
, t I my ’
m
own witn ess

You he sneered .
 I SUCCEE D TO MY HE RITAGE 169

And if that s not enough there s my si ster Annette

’ ’

m
,

Te pest an d H er Royal Highness the Princess of Wales

, ,

who rescued me from thi s vi l lain

I saw my uncle s face grow very gray ; he had not antici
’

pated I coul d be in touch with my si ster an d the shoc k ,

of thi s new revel ation silenced him . Whereu pon I followed

up my advantage an d striding up to him dem anded the
, ,

receipt th at Pas co had given him f or the draft.

H e made pretence to f umble for it in his pocket an d my ,

eye i n stinctively followed his hand . In that instan t he

exchanged a gl an ce with Pasco an d with a simultaneous ,

bound they both threw them selves on me one from the ,

front the other f

, rom the rear. It was a l u b berl y position
to allow myselfto b e taken in an d f or a moment they had
,

the best ofit for Pasco had pinioned my pi stol hand ; an d

,

had they been younger an d stronger men it had gone hard ,

with me . But whilst they attacked my fi ghtin g-tops they ,

f orgot my broad side. I is well enough to fi re at the top

” ‘

hamper when the enemy seeks flight but oflittle advantage ,

when youan d he are beam to b eam . One kick an d Pasco

was doubled up on the f loor being a an ofvery gross habit m
m m
, ,

to who a pl ug in the stom ach meant ore than it did

to most men . And when he was prostrate my uncle hauled
down his colours an d delivered me up the paper as ild as a
, m
Hindoo .
So that s how the wind blows said I an d looked at my
’ ’
, ,

uncle who had t umbled back into a chai r very green abo ut
, ,

the gi l ls an d at Pasco who was still writhing on the floor.

, ,

They had not the spirit left to curse me an d I was able to ,

peruse the paper I had captured at my leisure .

No wonder my uncle had defended it as long as he was
able f or it was a p ri z e worth fightin g to k
, eep or win . This
is how it told its tale

RE CE I VE D f ro m
Mr. T i othy T e pest the su o f m m m
s an d two hu
thou un d s, b
on e n d red
po ein
g the arrears
f
o an
170 THE QUEEN C AN DO NO W RONG
an n uity o
f £9100 m
u due to e sin ce 1802 , the con m
m
r

m
pe an n
d ition s b ein g that I do n o t cal l u on hi
f i n terest, si k
m m
or or
p p
un d so l on h t i u t th i
d uit
m m
co o a

m
p g s e co n n es o a
p y e e sa a n n y
u
,

p un c tually in f tu re d urin
g th e l if
et i e
f
o J i
r
y R abb it.
‘
A
f p
D ated this 19th d ay o ril , 18 14 .

P. Pasco?

Well I did not require an y explanation as to why thi s

,

annu ity was contingent on the life of J immy Ra bbit I

went to the door after ringing the bell an d when the pretty ,

little Iri sh colleen came Avourneen says I where s the

,
’
, ,
’

nearest m agi strate or Justice ofthe Peace

S ure an d there s Mr. O Brien at B allydaly sor.
’ ’ ’

m
,

Send a an for him I ordered an d have him here ’

, ,

express Tell him tis a high crime has been committed .

‘ ’

m
.

She looked at her as ter in amaz e ment an d at Pasco

gurgling on the floor but they neither ofthem had an y
,

objection to o f fer.
And who will I be sending she asked scared like. ,

Send Pat said I which was a safe order to give an d sati s

,
’
,

fi ed her f or she went to do my bidding .

,

It might have been an ho ur before Mr. O Brien arrived or ’

,

it might have been more ; but about halfway through the

-

time Pasco recovered him self an d took a seat opposite my

uncle an d they began t alking at each other an d f
,
rom ,

talking came to abusing an d acc using being as sav age as ,

two foxes caught in traps alongside one another ; an d pre

sen tl in thei r violent an d u n reasoning rage worked them
y , ,

selves into a f ren z y of recrimin ation during which they

m
,

reveal ed more than I cou ld ever have gotten out ofthe

short ofthe cat or a th u mbscrew .
D uring the which I sat silent perfectly co ntented to be a ,

passive li sten er to their amaz ing accusations an d revel ations

m
,

who had q u ite lost their head s in their virulent ut ual ,

m al ice an d harbo ured but one thought —each to implicat e

,

the other. By the time the m agi strate arri ved attended by ,
172 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
As the Lord is my j udge declared Pasco so l emnl y , I
know not how he fo und out, or his way hither. He hath a
m
personal anim us, very alicious, against me ; an d only the
other d ay did cruelly assault an d batter me, an d compelled
me to f ly from my b usiness with great loss to y respect m
ability an d pocket. And I m ad e inqu iri es an d fo und he was
Lieutenant James Rabbit ofthe Bo bay Marine a pen sioned
, m ,

officer. And how was I to know that he knew

m
Well I e not going to weary youwith al l that foll owed .
,

Timothy Tempest an d Pasco were arrested on their own con

f essions or rather on the strength ofthe accusations they
,

made against each other an d lodged in the gaol at D ublin

, ,

whither I went an d put my case in the hands ofa very clever

attorney an d perf ect scoundrel from truck to keel ifyou ay m
m
,

j udge hi by the bill he ran up against me. He would have

me f ight the whole case out in the co urt which m eant a great
m
,

business to hi self but the lawyer who was defending my

uncle m ade a proposal that ifI would withdraw f rom the

prosecution he would surrender the estate peacef ully an d ,

accou nt for the profits of the past fourteen years. My

anxiety being al l to retu rn to London an d decl are my
passion for Win some Lee I very readi l y agreed to this m uch
m
, ,

to y m an s disgust who wanted a long suit an d the j udgment

’
,

ofthe High Co u rt . There only rem ained Pas co to deal with

m m
,

who m ade an ad isericord ia app eal to my mercy to be

content with the ruin I had brought upon him by the break
ing up ofhis gam bli n g pal ace . And on the top ofthis came
Sarah Wells an d was down on her knees be fore me crying
m
, ,

an d i ploring — —
poor creature so that Well I let the ,

villain of f an d as it happened to go an d accompl i sh more

, , ,

evil than ever.

And now I m ust tel l you in a few words the story of

m m
T e pestown that you ay comprehend how I came to be
,

Master ofit .
My father Desmond Tempest was the seco n d ofth
, ,
 I SUCC EE D TO MY HERITAGE 173

m
brothers whereofhi selfan d the eldest Terence were by a
m
, , ,

mother of the Desmond fa ily an d Timothy the third , , ,

by a second marriage which my grandfather had contracted

m
,

th a Presbyt erian Scotchwo an who was his ho usekeeper ,

before he m arried her. Terence q uarrelled wi th his father

over this an d went abroad to take service in the army of the
,

D uke of Brunswick where a m utual regard arose between

m
,

hi an d the Princess C aroline then a gi rl at her f ather s

’
,

Court. It was termin ated by the betrothal of the Princess

to the Prince ofWales in 1794 an d after that my uncle ,

Terence turned reckless an d courted the death which he met

,

on the fi el d ofbattl e in less than two y

Meanwhile in 1795 my grandfather died an d at my uncle
m
, , ,

Terence s request my father wen t to live at T e pestown

’

whilst his stepmother removed to Dublin where her son , ,

Timothy who was a Protestant was being bred into a

, ,

lawyer.
Those were the d ays when it went hard for good Catholics ,

an d many a good Chri stian lost his estates becau se he was

a good Chri sti an . My f at her professed the Romi sh faith

m m
,

an d was ,
oreover a an of strong political views ; an d
,

having b ut l ittle to lose when he was b ut a younger son ,

attached him sel f to the revol u tionary party which desire d to

m
,

follow the ex a ple of France an d throw of fthe monarchial

,

form ofgovernment.
In thi s wayhe got implicated in the political con spiracy of
the times to such a d egree that when my uncle Terence died
in 1795 my father could not or would not withdraw him self
,

from his political associ ates. Two chil d ren had been born to

, m
him y si ster Annette an d myself an d when he succeeded to ,

the estate an d the dangerou

, s cou rse he was entangled in
predicted but one ending I alon e stood between T imothy
,

Tempest an d the heirship to the estates. But my fathers ’

m
love an d concern for e were so great there was a chance he
might rel in quish his political schemes out ofregard for my
17 4 T HE Q UEE N CAN D O N O WRONG
It was under these circumstances that my uncle Timothy
negotiated with Pasco to have me kidn apped an d with his
m
, ,

m
intimate knowledge of T e pestown indicated the way it ,

might be easiest accomplished . Luck an d circ u stances

favo u red the villain an d I was spirited away as you have
, ,

heard . The shock ofit threw my mother into a fever which ,

terminated fatally an d thi s co n catenation of disaster so

,

distracted my father that like my uncle Terence he sought , ,

oblivion in action an d thre w in his lot with the Wicklow

m
,

rebel s in the ad attempt of 98 .

”

Everybody knows the story of that mise rable fi as co with ,

its gleam oftran sient victory f ollowed by eclipse. My father

fled to France a procl aimed an . A little l ater came the m
m m
,

Union an d my un cle Ti othy p roved hi sel f very useful to

,

the King s party whereby he obtained the favour of Castle

’

reagh an d was able to bargain it that the f

, amily estates

shou ld not be escheated but him sel f allowed to succeed to

m m
,

them because he was such a loyal an ! Indeed you ay see

m
,

his name in the Bl ack Book in su ch hand some co pany as

m
Lord Cl an orris the Marq ui s of Ely Lord Cas tlecoote
, , ,

Wi l li am H andcock St. John Daly Henry Deane Grady

, , ,

Lord Lof tus an d others who sold their cou ntry s in d epen ’
,

dence for l ucre.

In addition to the succession to the estates Timothy was
rewarded with a receivership of C u stom s worth

m
a ,

year. H e was a thri f ty an his mother having come f rom

,

Glasgow a very unfeeling woman who ate cold haggi s for

, ,

her b reak fast I have been assu

, red . H e lived on the income

ofhis receivership an d spent e very penny of his rent-

, roll on

the improvement ofthe estates an d their enlargement. When

he was wrongfully settled in them the acres were many but
the production l ittle an d the income scarce two thousan d
,

pound s a year ; when he was compelled to surrend er them ,

acres were increas ed by a tho u sand the whole l an d d rained ,

an d reclaimed an d the rent roll so near fi ve thou

- san d pou nds
m
,

r w nw th at my own pen sion m ade u the d efi cit.

p e n , p
17 6 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
the house ! And the next daywrites a prodigious long letter
to Annette telling her that Con naught House was no longer
,

a fi t residence for her or an y p u

, re maid an d she m u
, st ch use

between him an d the Princess !

, m
Well my sister sent hi his letter back very rightl y
, ,

which was a correct rebuke for his impertinence an d taken

,

as su ch by him who never showed his face again . She con

,

tin u ed to hold her peace abo u t what she had done until
S urges contin ued an d unaccountable absence compelled her
"

to disclose the reason .

Bu t in that month I was away the roses f aded from her
cheek s an d the glad light from her eyes. And when I
,

retu rned an d cl asped her in my arms I saw that my best

, ,

friend had wrecked my si ster s lif e ! And so in fi n d in g a

’

si ster I lost On e whom I had come to esteem as dear as a

 CHAPTE R XIV

AND AM L UC KY I N LOV E

h was on the 15th of May that I got back to London . It

too k me but two min utes to be brother an d si ster with
Annette . She as heart sore an d wanted a brother ; at
w -

m
,

least she said she did . And for e I wanted a si ster which
, , ,

is a grand thing to have. E special ly if you are in love ,

because women as a sex are better equipped with the

, ,

principl es an d strategy oflove than men .

I have not spoke m uch of my being in love but you must ,

take it I really was an d very desperate . And al though a

, ,

sailor nervou
, s withal now that I was rich an d it came to
,

tacking into harbour. It was indeed my wealth that was , ,

overm uch cargo for me an d made me ride too deep instead

,

with the light buoyant motion ofa ship in f

,
ine bal las t. And
in thi s unaccustomed condition I conf ided my precarious
position to Annette who sister-wi se instruct ed me what
, , ,

course to pursue .
Shimmy said she (she never called me by an y other n a e
,
’ ’
m
to the last d ay of her life) I vow it is a most blessed an d
,

season able thing thi s f ortune coming to you. With fi ve

thousand pounds a year
Nay dear I interrupted her tis only two thou sand an d
’ ’
, , ,

fi ve hund red pou nds. ’

Why how is that she asked m uch surpri sed . Y ou

, ,

told me fi ve thousand a year

177
178 THE QUEEN CA N DO NO WRO N G
That assuredly 18 the co e of the Estate . But I have mm
a sister
Oh Shimmy she cried . And the next moment she who
, ,
’
,

had b ut j ust presented me with hal fa doz en most respectable

m
,

cold sisterly kisses vouchsafed me a doz en most war ones.

, ,

Never never Shimmy she protested . Only a little roo m

, , ,
’

ofmy own in you r house u ntil ,

Until what my dearP ’

m
,

Until I can su mon up courage to return to our ol d

family f aith an d enter a convent .
’

Y ouwill be a nice catch f or a convent An nette said I

’

, , ,

with your two thousand fi ve hund red pounds a year income .

Be su re an d choose a poo r foundation my dear. ’

An d — s —
trike my colours if she did not begin there an d
then to cry. And put me to con fusion.
Well we came to reason in about ten minutes for she had
, ,

a tou ch of the Tempest temper in her as well as the Iri sh

pluck only the girl was overwro ught with the treatmen t she
had experienced f rom that vill ain Surges who as I oft told , ,

him afterward s deserved to be triced up an d have his thirty

,

nine lashes weekly for a twelvemonth for his ill -behaviour to

'

her ; the which he admitted to be the simple truth .

Let us talk sense dear said I . Go into a conven t if
, ,
’

y ouwi sh . T is not a lif

‘
e I wou ld choose for y ou bu t youare ,

your own mi stress enti rely . Keep out ofone ifyouare so ,

di sposed an d be a shini n g light ofj oy for Shimmy s eyes.

,
’

Who f ancied years ago he saw in you

, r f ace the face that
,

might have been his own had he been born a girl ; an d

thereby felt more drawn towards your f orlorn condition so ,

that nothing delighted him more than to be legaliz e d to be °

your guardian an d your protector. Do as you please d ear ,

si ster ; but we share an d share alike in what our f ather has

tu
l ef
’
s.

( And th i mind me I h ve mo t t o u ly f
o t
m
s re s a s a r cio s rgo to
en tion that whil st I was in Irel an d An nette heard ofou
, r ,

ather s death . Bu
f t as she had not seen him f teen y ea
’
or fi f rs ,
180 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
No 81r.,

Wal king in the park

Again wrong. ’

She hath n ot gone to see her m other ( who lived at

R ichmond ) .
r s —
She returned from the e ye terday because you were
coming bac k Shimmy . At least such is my belief tho ugh
, , ,

she wou ld not confess it for a Kin g s ran som ’

I s she in the house I vent u red .

She is Shimmy. Waitin g a summon s ifyou m ust know

m
, ,

the truth . So that she ay co n gratulate you as is done in ,

polite society when one s friends come in for a fortun e . She ’

said indeed if she f

,
ailed to do so you wou
, ld sure take it
as a sign of very ill breeding an d that wou
- ld make her ,

sorry . Who ever tried to do credit to Her R oyal High

ness s bringin g up. And she actually grumbled that a sister
’

shou ld sudden ly spring into exi stence an d interpose for the ,

fi rst compliment between her an d her little scholar— th at

was
" ‘
monstrous polite ofher I declared , an d looked at my
I is ,
’

coat wishing I had put on my best one .

,

I thought I caught a quiz z ing look in Annette s eyes who ’

,

was very qu ick to observe trifles ; an d it di sconcerted me .

Sit down I said for we were standing I wi sh to have a
,
’
, ,

little brotherly converse with you.

Why Shimmy she protested that is not return ing
, ,
’ ”

,
’
—
Winsome s politeness to keep her waiting
T is about Winsome I wish to speak I said ifyouwill
’ ’
, ,

favou r me.
’

What about her Shimmy P asked Annette taking a seat ,

’
, ,

the which af f
orded me great relief.
Do you think I asked her that a an is j ,
’
ustifi ed to , m
propose m atrimony to a lady older than him sel f
It depends she an swered critically ; ifa an is forty he
,
’
m
is a fool to do so. ’

m
But ifa an is twenty -two
 AND AM LUCKY IN LOV E 18 1

It depen ds on the an m
And ifthe an was e P m m ’

Y ou are cu t ou t to m arry a wom an older than yo u rsel f ,

Shimmy . F or youwant controlling said she.

’
,

Winsome is older than myself I adventured . ”

She held her peace which I too kto be unkind ofher. And
,

there bein g no help for it I bl undered out ,

I want to m arry Winsome. ’

And Win some wants to marry you Shim y she declared m

m
’
, ,

in a ost horrid calm m atter-of-fact voice .

, ,

Hath she said so I cried eagerly .

Certainly not silly boy. No m odest m aid says that ofthe
m
,

an she lov es tho ugh m any feel it. ’

,

And when shall I askher i ”

Have yougot the word s pat Shimmy ? ,

”

Faith no ! But me new-born Iri sh b

, irth sho uld stand me
frin d when it comes to honey word s said I airin g a su spicion
’
, ,

ofthe b rogu e.
Well suppose I send her down
,
suggested Annette ,

rising an d m aking f or the door.

—
Oh, w ait wait I cried I a not so red hot ready ,
- m
with my speech as I should like to b Give me a little
m
e.

g ra ce to co
p ose my feeling s an d m arsh al my wo rd s. F o r

tis a thing I might have carried of feasy eno u gh before I

’

came into thi s fortune an d I wish to Heaven 1 had . F or

m
,

I woul d rather of fer myself as a poor an than a rich

’
one.
Annette c aught me by the lappels ofmy coat an d pulling ,

my face down ki ssed me in a fleetin g way.

m
,
"
T is the an Win some w an ts Shimmy an d not the , ,

money she whi spered an d ran from the room leaving me

,
’
, ,

trepid ated .
Whether it was d one on purpose I do n ot know but Win ,

some kept me waiting a good ten min u tes. An d a worse ten

—
min utes I ne ver experienced in my li fe no not even when ,

the win d threatened to fail me in a chase an d the pi rates ,

’
18 2 THE Q UE EN CAN DO NO WRONG
harbour close an d thei r craf
, t suppl ied with sweeps to en able
them to crawl in .
I could not stand idle an d so began altering the situation ,

ofthe f urniture in the room ; an d yet never knew what I was

doing until I had done it an d heard a hearty laugh fro ,
m
Winsome who had slipped in silently an d saw me double
,

reefi n g the cu rtai n s with the sof a anchored in the middle of

,

the carpet an d the chairs huddled in a corner as it might be

, ,

in dock . God knows how when or why done ! , ,

Well that started me in a pretty confusion for the action

,

that was immin ent an d whilst I was endeavouring to explain

, ,

sweet Win some was p u tting the things back in their places ,

an d I withou t the gumption to lend a hand till it came to the

sof a which was too heavy f
, or her strength . So I gave her a

help with it an d at her suggestion rolled it into a corner

, , ,

that was sun g an d its back to the light. And then something
impelled me to sit down on it an d pull her into the seat by ,

my side .
She had no obj ection to urge . And the touch ofher an d ,

the dear smile ofher an d a something I can not explain in ,

the attitude ofher gave me heart. And al l ofa sudden I

,

rew as bold as a lion — tho ugh m aybe I d i

d not show it .
g , ,

Win some said I youtaught me my alphabet.

,
’
,
’

Did I she replied af fecting forgetfulness. ,

And read ing. ’

To be sure . ’

And writing. ’

Which youapparently have forgot . ’

I will show youmy private log ifyouwill let me said I , ,

’
,

with God Bless my Mi stress Winsome L ee wrote at the

end ofeach day s entry . ’ ’

Ah she said an d caught her breath .

’
, ,

And you taught me m anners I went on inexorably ful ,

’
,

fillin g my preconcerted scheme .

Y ou ever had good m ann ers Mr. Rabbit . At leas t so , ,

the Princess decl ared. ’

18 4 THE QUEEN C AN DO NO WRONG
eyes an d golden hair m aking her fairer for to see than an y
‘

m aid I have ever looked on in my l i fe .

And the feeling came to me that nothin g in this world
could come between me an d my winsome Win some !
When Annette came down which she did in about hal fan
,

hour (with a di screet knock at the door an d to warn us H er ,

R oyal Highness might be back at an y moment) she f ound

Win some an d me as oblivious oftime an d circum stances as
only newly engaged lovers are capable of. There was no need
-

to tell her our news she read it in a glance from Winsome s ’

bl ushi n g cheeks an d my embarrassed attitude.

She came up at once an d putting her arm s around Win
,

some ki ssed her with a tou

, chin g tenderness.
What a lucky girl I have been tod ay she said to have ,
”

gained a brother an d sister in one afternoon . ”

But we have alway s been sisters Annette said Winsome .

’
, ,

T was you who called me you r si ster when I was the

Princess s Charity -girl said Annette sof

’

, tly .
’

And took me for your pupil when I was Her Royal High o

h
’
ne ss s a r -
C ity boy I reminded her.
’
,

She hath m any good q ualities Shimmy said Annette , ,

’
,

toyin g with Win some 8 pretty silken - golden curls but the
, ,

greatest ofthem 1s Charity .

Charity declared Winsome with a hal f-smile covereth a ‘

m
, ,

ultitude of
Graces I broke in an d is the divin est grace ofal l . As
,
’
,

Annette an d I Charity boy an d Charity-gi rl —do kno w.

— -

Who hav e experienced it from Our Lady Kind an d Bounti ful ,

an d f rom ou r Winsome .
’

And I can tell youthat in al l living London there was not

a happier an d more thankf ul heart than mine an d Winsome
cl imed to be similarly happy an d Annette too only
a —
Winsome an d I knew that Annette gaz in g on us could not , ,

but think ofher lover that was lost to her. F or although

Surges was a stilted soldier in his punctilio an d his pride of
pedigree with his name after the great Mr. Hastings he had
, ,
 AND AM LU CKY IN L OV E 18 5

somehow gotten complete possession ofAn nette s heart . But ’

that is the way of women aye even of those accounted , ,

sensible in hou e ; often most fooli sh where they

sehold lif

most fond.

When the Princess returned an d was di srobed an d in the , ,

d wing room Annette went to in form her that I had returned

ra -
,

from Irel an d an d was desi rou

, s ofpaying my hu mble duty to
her. And came back with a comm and f or Winsome an d me

to attend H er Royal Highness at on ce . And that I think , ,

was the only time in ou r lives that Win some an d I were shy
an d nervou s ofentering the Princess s p resence .
’

H er Highness looked at me with a rogui sh whim sical ex ,

pression on her face when I entered the room for Annette ,

had told her ofou r engagement an d she was ever one who ,

loved a jest an d prank .

Y ou m ust introdu ce me to you r f
’
riend Mi ss L ea said

m
,

she very fine an d grand in her speech f or I a told d is

m
, ,

gentle an is Mr. Desmond Tempest a person of great ,

estate an d de ancient f amily in I reland . Nay vas it not ,

mentioned d at he is descended from de Kin gs of d at

country
N o no M ad am I cried an d knelt bef ore her an d solicited
’

m
, , , , ,

her han d I a only Jimmy Rabbit that Your R oyal High

, ,

ness saved from the High wayman an d was Patron ess to for ,

twelve years an d more Gracious an d Kind an d Bountiful to

,

than an y poor word s ofmine can express. And oh Mada ,

m ,

dear Mad am let me always rem ain Jimmy Rabbit to

,

you
She seemed about to stretch forth her hand that I might
ki ss it when suddenly she chan ged her mind on the spur of
, ,

an in stant youmight say an d rising f rom her chai r in some

m
, ,

what ofa fl urry (as it seemed to e) walked q uickly to the ,

window without a word an d stood looking out. And then I

,

observed her secretl y draw out her lace handkerchieffrom her

pocket an d wipe her eyes.
18 6 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
The next momen t she turn ed roun d the dew still in her
m m
,

blue eyes but the kin dest s ile upon her face an d ca e
, ,

tow ards Winsome an d mysel f.

Children she said for you hafboth been my children
’

m
, ,

Oh I a ver glad ver glad ! And you sall always b

,
’
, e
’

Shimmy to me ; an d ifI did love youbefore Shimmy for , ,

your own sake I do love you now for your uncl e s dat vas a
,
‘

dear loyal f iend of mine. She beckoned to An nette to

’
, r
approach an d went on , See.you two—broder an d sister ,

did you vere my nephew an d my n iece I co uld not love you

more. An d d at is vat you might hafbeen ifde goot Gott ,

had not cursed me wid de Royal Birth . ’

And with that Her Royal Highness condescended to kiss

m
,

fi rst Ann ette then mysel f an d l astly Win some to who she
m m
, , ,

add ed with a s ile Y oudo now belong to de sa e f , amily ,

V inny an d I vill be a f
, oster aunt to youall
-

Thus was my engagement sanctioned an d approved by My

Lady Kind an d Bo untiful an d the on ly thing needed to co , m
l ete it the blessing of Mrs. Lee . Conc rni g thi I kne w
p e n s

there would be no d if ficu l ty b ut only delight f or I had cal le d , ,

on the poor invalid lady thrice before I went to Ire land an d

m
,

I ay tell youshe was very fond ofme.

Her Highness comman ded os al l to dine with her that
evening . There as a con side ble company Lord Fitz
w ra —
Will iam L ord an d Lad y Essex Lord Hardwick Mr. an d
m
, , ,

Mi ss Gratton Lady Charlotte Campbell Lad y Anne Ha il

, ,

ton Sir Wil liam Gell (he had j ust b

, een knighted ) Mr.Keppel ,

Craven an d our three selves. The Princess was in the most

m
,

genial spi rits an d spared n either Winsome s bl ushes n or y

,
’

own embarrassment for she publicly announced our engage,

ment an d invited the company to d rink our health. An d

,

when the l adies an d gentlemen toasted me as Mr Desmond a

Tempest Her Highness held up her gl ass high an d lookin g

,
’
,

at me with eyes as kindly as tho se which looked at me that

d ay I l ay on the tab le an d my broken leg was being set by

m
,

Mr. Ed ead es she called her toast : ,

 CHAPTE R XV

A PERSECUT ED P RI N C ESS

m mnow ext que y to H R y l Highnes

Con c vs e an ra e rr er o a s

the P ince f W le d metime even we ing the

o mf the Bomb y Ho e M ine— one
r ss o a s, an so s ar

unif r o W wita rs ar as or t U s

described it. But what did I care who was in love with , ,

every opport unity to ind ulge it an d My Lady Kind an d ,

Bo untiful to serve honour an d obey ? And Desmond Tem

m
, ,

pest Mas ter ofT e pestown an d extra eq uerry to the future

, ,

Queen of England coul d always levy respect from cits an d

wits wi th his sq uare chin an d cantankerous m outh if his ,

birth an d breeding failed to command it.

It was altogether a new life an d carried me behind these ,

scen es where R oyal ty poses bef ore the footlights leaving the ,
—
tights ofhumanity at the wings a costome to be adopted
when it return s from the stage where robing an d strutting is,

part ofthe pantomime . And the pantomime very apparent

to those who attend the R oyal mummers when they have
done their actin g.
Standing to attention at the wings ofthe Theatre Royal
Connaught House I learnt m an y things. F or in thi s queer ,

complex comedo-tragic drama I was now assisting at as super ,

there was much to observe. I ts shallow littlenesses an d its ,

deep realities its farcical jealousies an d its sombre pathos

, ,

its innuendo an d its intrigue its comedy that merited lau

, ghter ,

a nd its tragedy that compelled tears. I tell youit was very

human .
188 l
 A PE RSECUT ED PR INCESS 18 9

x I do not think I can do better in this chapter than place

ouin po ssession ofthe actu al ta tu a d event appe rtaining
y s s n s

thereto, which surrounded Caroline of Brunswick Princess of ,

Wales d urin g that las t eventful summer preceding her de

,

parture from the country that had invited her to m ake her
home in it as wi fe ofthe Hei r to the Throne .
,

H er position was b riefly thi s. She was the outcast an d

outraged wife ofth e Prince Re gent who in a brutal com
m
, ,

un ication to her writ ten within a year of thei r marri age

, ,

an d known as T he Letter of License invited her to go her

’
,

own wa n d indicated his intention ofpu u ing hi F

m
a r or
y, s s.

six years she lived a li fe ofabsol u te reti rement an d bla eless

,

unostentation such as no n or-m aid -n or-wi f

, e n or widow could
- -

have‘ tered in rectitu de or di screetness. It was elev ated

by her charity an d her love for orphan child ren whose own ,

child was inhumanly torn from her arms.

Then her husband tempted by the foul plot an d sugges
,

tions of Sir John an d Lady Douglas ( wherein Lady Jersey ,

H is R oyal Highness s f ’
ormer mistress was an accomplice)
m
,

attempted the in of the Princess by the loathsome an d

cont mptible proces of the Delicate Investig tion an
e s a —
abo rtive con spi racy which covered him with the shame an d

disgrace he was not gentleman enough to recogni se an d regret.

Thereafter for eight years he pursued his malevolent course
of tyrann y an d spite encompassed his wife with spies
, ,

an d even desired to rake into flame the despicable dead

embers of the Delicate Investigation an d in the face of

,

Briti sh principles ofL aw an d Justico to have the issue re

,

tried .
Oh it was most damnable an d of
, fensive to us who loved
Ou r Lady . It was most d amnable an d of fensive to Common
Fairness. It was a second villainous shot discharged at an
unarm ed adversary (an d she a woman ) in a d uel who being , ,

unable to return the shot had yet not flin ched b

, ut stood up
, ,

with al l the pride an d bravery of Brunswick a proud an d ,

brave target for further attack . Even the sl uggi sh intel l i

190 T HE Q U EEN CAN DO NO WR ONG

g e n ce of the p eople of Engl and ( who are a cent ury behind th e

Iri sh in chivalry) perceived it an d revolted . The whi ch that

same intelligen ce seld om does a ainst anythi n g saving taxa
g
ti on ; it s proprietary bein g in Buon aparte s word s truly a
,
’
,

nation ofshopkeepers.
m
Matters were cul inating in a cri si s when I was ap
pointed extra eq uerry to Her R oyal Highness. Ou the
4th ofMarch p revio u s had died Sir John Do u g las the weak , ,

invertebrate Lieutenant-Colonel of Mari n es who had been a ,

pliant tool in his wick ed wife s hands an d wearing the King s

’

, ,
’

uni f orm an d decorated with the King s knighthood had ’

, ,

sou ght to ruin the King s niece an d daughter-in -l aw. The

’

rem ain s ofthi s pinchb eck hero were accorded a pom pous mili
tary funeral to the disgust an d contemp t ofeveryone who
,

saw the p assing pageant in which the Du , ke ofYork with ,

his sycc phan tic subserviency to his brother the Prince R egen t ,

took a part .
I cannot catalogue al l the matters which went to m ake up
what the Moorish proverbs call s the last straw that bro ke
the camel s back . Insult was piled on insul t outrage on
’ ’
,

outrage by the Prince Regent or his toadies or minion s

, , ,

who conceived a woman an d a Princess as fair a quarry to b e

baited as a badger 18 . I vow it was most damnable an d o f fen

sive to chivalrou s f —
eeling an d yet not a an to be cal led to m
accou nt for it. I t was a cowardly campaign for the foe who ,

twanged their poisoned darts were hidden an d it culminated

in h umiliations so intolerable that even the Prin cess s brave ’

spirit was cru shed .

And fi rst with regard to the Princess s treatment by her ’

com peers. T here was Prince Paul of Wirte b er

g arri ved m ,

her own sister s son an d a poo r on e to look at bein g a

’
, ,

squ inting lean fi n ickin g can ary bird creature . He ignored

, ,
-
the Princess an d failed to cal l upon her in order that he
,

might stand better with the Regent. Another R oyal vi sitor

was the Gran d Du chess Catherine ofOl den burg sister to the ,

Emperor of Russia who also fail ed to call at Con n aught

,
192 THE QUE EN CAN DO NO WRONG
haird ressing . He changed the colour ofhis wig about thi s
time an d the fashion ofits curl s an d decreed darker-coloured
, ,

clothes. So excellent was his taste that all the Tailors ,

an d Barbers in the Kingdom accl aimed him as their Prince ,

Prophet an d Apostle.
H is gallantries have been of t described b ut cannot bear ,

description in these pages which I wi sh to keep decent an d

, ,

wherein I have no room n or inclination to relate the secre t

amou rs ofColonel Fox an d his valet Colonel M Mahon .,
’

The Public Mistress in f avou r ( when I was at Connau ght

House) was Lady Hertford who had supplanted Lady J ersey
, ,

to be herselfpresently supplanted by Lady Conyn gham ; an d

the state an d con sequence ofthese reigning harlots was an
insult to the virtuous womanhood of England . As for the
Prince Regent s person al behaviour his notorious potation s
’

were deeper than ever an d he was perhaps more freq uen tly
, , ,

carried to bed than not.

As f or pu blic popularity he had none but only the con
m
, ,

d e n ation an d disgu st ofthe nation as apart f rom the syco

phantic an d servile few who crawled into an d basked in the
fi ck l e su m
n shin e ofhis agn ifi cen t smile . Whenever he drove
ab road at thi s pe riod of which I a m
writing he was b o m
barded with groan s an d hi sses an d did you hear a sound of
,

riot an d b ooting in the streets you might pretty safely guess

,

it was the passage ofthe Prince Regent s coach an d him in it.

‘

m
,

The British people ay be a nation ofshopkeepers an d the ,

I rish one of pauper patriots but they both loved honest

,

dealing ( which the Iri sh never received ) an d cleanly lives

none mo e th th t mo st vi rt uo u f l l n tion — the
( r s o an a s o a a s

Iri sh as the b
,
astardy tables will prove to you ) an d when ,

they groaned an d hi ssed it was at the absence of these

m
essenti al qualities in the an who ruled them by the Right
Divine . The which doctrine so freely used by Jacobites
’
,

an d other R oy ali sts has always stru

, ck me as a singular i n sult
to the intelligen ce ofthe Almighty .
An d n ow since I have mentioned the Prin ce an d his para
,
 A PE RS ECU TED PRINCESS 193

sites I must not shirk reference to those who the Princess

, m
condescended particul arly to mark out for her favour. And
fi rst ofal l William Au stin the child she ad opted as a babe
,

in the same year as she rescued me an d whom some f ool s ,

an d liars f oully suggested was Her R oyal Highness s own of ’

spring ! He was now grown a boy of twelve years ofage ,

an d m u ch spoiled by the Princess an d in consequence by , , ,

her household an d en tou ra e.

g A shrewd impertin ent little ,

ape an d whe n he an d I had a di f

, ference ofopinion an d he ,

attempted to bite an d kick me I set him on the top ofa ,

six- foot cupboard an d let him howl there while I laughed at

,
—
him for ten minutes an d well after that we were very good
, ,

friends an d his beh aviou r to me su ch as it sho uld be from

m m
,

su ch a l ittle id shipshri p to one who had commanded his

ship at sea. And to show you a trait in the Princess s ’

character wh en Wil l ikin s ran to her complaining about my

,

ill -treatment ofhim she told him it served him right an d

, ,

thanked me for what I had done.

Other favourites ofthe Princess s were Sir William Gell ’
,

a most so u nd honest gentleman an d Lord Hen ry F itz Geral d

, , ,

to whom she was very partial . And there was that whiskered
old baboon Saccharin i who sang like the tenor notes in
, ,

an organ an d enchanted H er Highn ess. I think she was

,

too condescending to him ( thou gh ever with a sort of con

tempt at his rapacity ) an d I blame her for it. But then
, , ,

H er R oy al Highness was so essential l y human ! Did I not

know it to whom she had displayed the truest humanity ?
,

Did not al l know it who knew her ? Who saw the unaf f
ected
candour ofher daily l i fe an d its actions ? And for that fool
Surges who af
, fected to see what was never to b e seen I had ,

no patience to listen to him b ut though he was my el der by

, ,

a doz en years bade him hol d his tongu

, e when he be an with
g
h is u -
co gh broke periods an d obj ection s an d criticism s ofa
character he could not understand .
For My Lady Kind an d Bountif ul was an honest good
woman even though she might have b
, een in discreet fli
pp an t , ,

13
194 THE Q UEE N CAN DO NO WR ON G
d free inher etiq uette . An honest good wom an I swear ;
m m
an

an d the an who dares hint to the contrary must fi ght e .

And now to continue my story which I pick up again in ,

this month ofMay 18 14. On the 2 6th the Princess went to

,

Worthing for a short soj ourn taking Winsome an d Annette

,

with her in addition to her usual small suite whereo fI n ow

m
,

formed one by reason of y of fi cial po sition . We did not

reach ou r j ourney s end u
’
m
ntil idnight much to the disap ,

pointment of the worthy town speople who had illuminated ,

their streets an d ho uses an d waited up until eleven o clock

,
’

with the intention ofunhorsing the Princess s carriage an d ’

dragging it themsel ves to the house she had taken for her
accommod ation .
One reason for this vi sit was to en able the Princess to
escape from London an d the threatened ef
, fect ofan in sul ting
letter from Her Majesty the Queen wrote at the instigation ,

ofthe Prin ce R egent an d f orbidding the Princess of Wal es

m
,

to attend two Drawing -roo s it was intended to hold in

hono ur of the vi sits of the allied Sovereigns. His R oyal
Highness publicly an n oun ced : It is my fi xed an d unalterable
determination not to meet the Princess ofWales upon an y
occasion either public or private . To which Her R oyal
,
’

Highness com posed a spirited reply expressing eq ually her

m
, , ,

determination to be present at these Drawing-roo s ; but

“

Mr. Whitbread who was her Parliamentary champion an d

m
,

m entor at thi s ti e woul d not allow her to sen d the letter but
, ,

compelled her to retu rn an answer acq u iescin g in the Q ueen s

m
’
'

demeaning com and . Next came Mr. B rougham into the

Princess s council s with advice ofan opposite tenor. Where
’

upon a third letter was wrote an d despatched by the Princess ,

taking up the stronger attitude which her own spirit had f irst
dictated . Ultim ately a copy of the correspondence was
,

forwarded to the Speaker of the House of Commons an d a ,

Debate ensued thereon ; an d from that Debate an d the ,

publicity thus given to the intolerable position ofthe Princess ,

196 T HE Q UE EN CAN DO NO WRONG
her mother were ren dered irk some an d derogatory by the
,

presence ofthe Duchess ofLeeds with orders to report every

,

thing that was said . Thi s policy an d (I have no doubt ) the

su m
btle strea ofpoison that daily trickled into the Princess
Charlotte s ears were not without their ef
’
f
ect on the i m
p r ess ion ab l e nat ure ofthe yo u n g gi rl who,inherited some of

her f ather s b ad q u alities with m any of her mother s good

’ ‘

ones. It is not for me to j udge the cond uct ofa Prin cess ,

who although so youn g was so august ; nevertheless I will

, , ,

ven ture it that the re was not at this time the absolute
sympathy an d respectf ul af fection between mother an d
d aughter that should have exi sted ; an d the person to bla e m
was the h u sband of the one an d the f ather of the other.

That the Princess oft behaved in d ifi eren tl y to her mother is

'

a statement not to be ref uted ; b m

ut I a not in accord with
those j udges ofher character who declared the d augh ter d id
not care for the mother or reciprocate her af
, fection my ,

experience being cont rariwi se . I was privileged to en joy the

Princess Charlotte s acq uaintance about this time an d I
’
,

ascribe her cond u ct more to a natural thoughtl essness an d

impatience ofcharacter than to an y substan tial in fraction of
the fi fth comm andmen t . Nor should it he forgot that it was
d iffi cul t for her to hono u r her mother ( as the Bible req u ires)
when that ill -used Princess suf fered so m uch dishonour an d
contumely at the hands of the very people by whom the
Princess Charlotte was surro unded an d in fluen ced .

Her Royal Highness spent a fortnight at Worthing an d I ,

do not know that I ever remember to have en joyed a more

ref reshing holiday . The weather was singu larly fi n e the ,

temperature agreeable an d no more rain than was seasonable

,

( alth o ugh a del uge f ollowed in J un e) an d the Princess with ,

her usual thoughtf ul ness made b ut the smallest demand s

,

upon my time so that I was able to spend the most of my

,

days an d evenin gs with Winsome an d Annette an d to ,

solidi f y those attachments in a way that could never have

 A PERS ECUTED PRIN CE SS 197
’

m
been achieved in the conventional at osphere an d under the
artifi cial code of Society . To h ave you r own si ster f
or a

chaperone to your sweetheart an d to be yourself spoiled by

m
,

sweetheart an d si ster is elevating a an to a place which can

m
,

compare with Heaven in some particulars ; an d I speak f ro

experience ofthe former an d a very li vely Irish imagination

,

with regard to the latter.

It was a fortnight of smiles an d sweetness of wooing an d
,

Winsome ofAnnette an d most lovable association s. We

,

three basked in a continual sun shine an d thanked God . F or

,

the sunshine was the gracious favo ur of Our Lad y Kind an d

Bounti ful which (for me) sancti f
, ied the smiles an d the
sweetness an d the associ ations ofthat golden f ortnight.
 C H APTER XVI

T HE BEARDIN G OF T HE REGENT

I I E R ROYAL H
'

m eturned to Lond on on the 8 th of

n n n ss r
Jun e which was the d ay after the arrival of the Emperor of
,

Ru ssia an d the Kin g ofPru ssi a. The Bru n swick pride was
fermenting within her an d the advice of Mr. Brougha
,
m
encouraged her in a course ofaction calculated to support her
own dignity .
H er R oyal H u sband had decl ared he wou ld not meet her
on an
y occasion ,p u blic or p r ivate, an d H er Maj esty the

Queen warned her she could not be ad mitted to her Court .

Thi s roused an obstinacy in Caroline an d she d etermined to
m
,

eet the Re gent face to face in public. F or she had a spirit

of contrad ict ion in her which was increased an d never su b
du ed by Opposition an d it flashed out n ow in one brilliant
,

scene which we who loved her ever remembered an d sh all

, ,

contin ue to with pride satisfaction an d admiration .

, , ,

It happened on S aturday the l 1th ofJun e. F or three

,

days Her Royal H ighness had scarce spoke but only read ,

an d re read the j ou
- rn als of the d ay that were f ull of the
,

doings of the potentates an d princes now visiting at the

Court ofSt. James s. She was nursing her wounded soul in
’

proud silen ce an d listening to the commi seration of her

,

friend s an d f ollowers with a subdued d ignity that rose

su perior to the q uerulousness of her general character. A
great cri si s in her life was approaching an d she elevated her ,

sel fto meet an d su rmou nt it .

198 l
200 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
voice so commonplace you might have thought it was a
begging petition for her patronage f ro some as pirin g m
trad es an ! m
At Connau ght House our indignation at the treat en t to m
which the Princess was su bjected grew intense . Sir Willia m
Geli was the ringleader in voicing our opinion an d most ,

violent in his condemnation ofthe Prince R egent.

I feel mysel f contempti ble he declared to b ,
e li vi n g in
’
,

thi s country an d witness to this political an d fashion able

,

prostration before one so unworthy as the Prince Regent . I t

is fas t coming to thi s that al l who fail to bow d own be f

m
,
ore

him will be impri soned . I coul d wi sh so e public disturb

ance to ari se an d m ake an end of thi s despicab l e state of
things ! Were other men s minds strung to the same tone as
’

mine there would be a revolution—or at least a very w orthy

, , ,

riot .
’

F or three days f rom the 8 th to the 11th of J u n e

or some sign—a
, ,

Her R oyal Highness waited patiently f

chamberlain call ing a letter or even a message indirectl y
, ,
—
deli vered that the Emperor of Russia an d the King of
Prussia had no intention to forget their duty towards the
daughter ofthe Duke of Brun swick an d the niece ofthe
King ofEnglan d . The sign never came . On this Saturday
of which I a m
writing as the cl ock struck the hour of
,

noon the Princess being in the great drawing-room upstairs

, , ,

su ddenly altered her whole compartment as a person does ,

after ce t in tip l ted hour is passed an d a time bargain

a r a s u a -

expi red an d as I belie ve closed a chapter in her life. H er

, , ,

husband had spurned her for eighteen years an d now these

m
,

two Sovereigns of E urope were si il arly inclined to ignore

—
her. An d she determined to assert hersel f not as the
Princess ofWales b ut as Caroline ofBrun swick .
,

The l ast stroke of twelve ran g ut f

o ro mthe lock an d c ,

the Prin cess who , had been fi d getin g on the sofa spran g ,

to her feet.
 T HE BEAR DING OF TH E RE GENT 201

Shimmy she ordered me go to de Opera House an d

’

m
, , ,

ive d e Managemen t my com an ds f or a do u ble box to

g
night Opposite de von de Prince Regent an d his guests do
haf Bid dem make de arran gements for me to be escorted
m
.

to it mit de respect an d attention d ue to y rank. As ’

she spake she wal ked toward s the d oor of the apart
ment on the threshold of which she halted . An nette
, ,

atten d me . I have some letters f or you to write . V in

som ,
ven Lady Charl otte Lindsay an d Lad y Charlotte
Campbell come say I do vish to see dem both in de Bl ue
,

Boudoir. And tell Sicard d at de two Doctors Burney an d

Lady an d Miss Ra wdon sall dine vid me to n ight . Covers
for twelve an d ve m u st h ave dinner at six o clock p u nctu ’
,

ally as de Opera is timed f

, or hal fpas t seven an d I do intend
-
,

to arrive dere sim ul taneously vid d e Regent an d deir

’
Maj esties.
Thus she adverti sed her intrepid intention to throw down
the gauntlet an d heard her h usband an d his guests in public .
And with head erect an d d efian t features strode out ofthe
room in an acted hau teur that tri umphed over the humilia
tion rankling in her breast.
I proceeded immediately to the Haymarket to execute the
Princess s commands an d to my indignation an d disgust was
’
,

told by the of fi cial in charge ofthe house that al l the boxes

were engaged an d not one co ul d b , e supplied to H er Royal
Highness who shoul d have applied earlier ifshe desired one.
,

I tell you I was struck nearly m ute at thi s churli sh

insult to my dear Mistress. And I could not contain my
passion.
Sirrah I cried to the scoundrel ifthe box Her R oyal
’

m
, ,

Highness com ands is not promised to be at her d i sposal

this instant I will go out an d publish the f
, act in the streets

by proclamation an d she shall be escorted here this e vening

,

b y the Citi z en s of London who will w reck

, you an d yo ur
damned Opera House ifher command is not o b eyed. ’

Do youthreaten e he cried . m
202 THE QUE EN CAN D O NO WR ONG
Faith said I I ll thrash you in two seconds if you
’ ’

m
, ,

presume to cock your fi sh-eyes at e like that ! A guarantee

for the box thi s in stant or I will do as I have warned you
’
. ,

I believe I must have l ooked very cantankerous for he ,

went of fthe boil as q uick as a saucepan halffil l ed when you

brim it up with cold water. And with no more ad o promi sed
m e what I had come f or.

T is well for ou I told him n d I will now do youthe

’ ’

y a , ,

favou orm youthat H er R oyal Highness will n ot d is

r to in f

pense with her escort ofCiti z en s. But I will undertake to

keep them in rank ifyour execution ofthe Princess s co ’
m
mands merits it. ’

And so back to Connaught House .

So incen sed at the treatment she was compelled to endure
was the Princess that to m ake her revolt the more prominen t , ,

she had conceived the idea oftaking Wil l ik in s to the Opera ;

an d when I entered the drawing - room was di sp u ting the point
with her ladies an d Sir Wil liam Gell who were trying to ,

di ssuade her f rom doing that which her best f riends cou ld not
but hold as inj udicious an d her enemies would certainly ,

ascribe to worse motives. Pau sing bef ore I presumed to m ake

her my report I heard her voice rai sed in an ger an d in si sten ce
,

Damn me den he sal l go l Dey did say he vas my son ! I

m
,

vill show him to dese Maj esties d at dey ay see vot sort of
son dey did accu se Caroline ofBru nswick ofbearing ! V illi
kin s face is de best answer to de liars an d de plotters.
’ ’

There was no reply to this but only a pain f ul silence such , ,

as ensu es when one in authority acts or speak s in the wrong .

Ah she cried perceiving e so youhafret urn Shimm y!
,
’
, m , ,

Y ousall decide d is puz z le an d told me what she had propo sed

’
, ,

an d how al l her su ite were against it. Y ouvill side vid me ,

Shimmy von t you she asked j ust as a chil d might .

,
’

Madam I said with a low bow I should certainly side

,
’
,

with Your R oyal Highness b ut for one thing. ,

’

V ot d at P she asked f rowning.

’
,

And then I tol d her how I had been ref used a b ox for h er
 TH E QUE EN CAN DO NO WRON G
Royal H ighness in a f
al se position my fi xed determinati on
—the which in the temper ofthe
,

was to storm the hou

m
se ,

pul ace, was easy

done .
Shimmy said the Princess to me as the carri age fell into
’
, ,

a. walk down the H aymarket an d I began to reconnoi tre

,

brough the window V y youlook so fi erce

m
,

Faith Mad am I said

, I ay have to rally your
,
’
,

scort .
’
e

May you she cried an d cl apped her hands in gl ee . Oh

m
, ,

Shimmy Shimmy ifyoucould only bring di sgrace on hi to

, ,

night And looked keenly into my eyes an d nodded her head ,

0 that I co u ld read as plain as ifit were printed for me to

ee the thou
, ght passing through her mind .
Further converse was rendered impossible by a prodigious
ou n d ofb ooting an d groaning that now fi l l ed the air an d ,

nur carri age was stopped at the bottom ofthe H aym arket by

he military posted in the streets to keep order.

V y you stop my carriag e deman ded the Princess
m
,

brusting her head out ofthe window. I a de Princess of

7ales.
’

The of fi cer in charge came to the sal ute an d then expl ained ,

hat the Prince R egent an d thei r Maj esties the Empero r of

tu ssia an d the Ki n g ofPru ssi a were j ust entering the Opera

l ou se .

So. And de people are groaning at dem Oh my dear ,

;oot people sh e cr ied . I t a nk y ou— I de P rince ss o fV al es , ,

lo tank you. ’

m
A near at hand caught the word s spoke an d
m
m
an ,

ed iatel
y b u rst in to cheers with shou ts of Long live the ,
’
rin cess ofwa les Way for the Princess ofWales ! Way
or the People s Princess ! Long live the Innocent
’

It was caught by the m ultitude with tum ul tuous an d ,

ncreas in
g h uz z as a nd d ashing
, the soldiers aside
, they ,

scorted the carri age to the chiefdoo r where the red carpet ,

ras sb read an d f ormed into a lane for H er R oyal H ighness

,

0 pass throu gh into the H ouse.

 THE BEARDI NG OF TH E RE GENT 2 05

She drest in royal crim son with a crown ofdia onds

was , m
on her head an d in her hand she carried a black satin fan on
, ,

which was embroidered in white the device of the Bl ack

Bru n swickers — a sk u l l an d cross bones And her b
- are neck
an d ample bosom her ears her wri sts an d her fi n ers sparkled
, , g ,

with flashing gem s. And for her face I seldom saw it look ,

more handsome an d d ign ified .

Oh proud d ay for Jimmy Rabbit the charity boy ! It fell
m
, ,

to me to give My Lad y Kind an d Bountiful my ar . She

accepted it an d I f ,
—
elt her hand the brave Brun swick han d
—trembling wi th excitement as it l ay on my sleeve an d with ,

courtesies right an d left through the dense aven ue of

,

accl aim ing Citi z en s whose hats an d kerchief

, s waved th eir

wild extravagant welcome she entered the Opera Hou

, , se

three minutes after her husban d had been booted into it !

The theatre of fi cial s were all engaged in attending him an d
his R oyal guests to the Royal box situ ated on the right side
,

ofthe au di tori um . The one I had secured for the Princess

was on the lef t (as I knew) an d I gave a short stern command
, ,

to an inferior of fi cial to lead the way with a look which so ,

overawed him that the l ackeyfi ed fellow preced ed H er High

ness walking b
, ackward s an d bowing at every pace as it ,

might have been to the Q ueen herself! It was like a con

j uror s trick done so instantaneously secretly an d success
’

, , ,

f ully ; an d Her H ighness entering her box b ut a fe w seconds

af ter the Prince Re gent had entered his an d whilst the ,

m usicians were still in the act of performing God save the

King an d thei r Majesties settling the selves in their pl aces.
,
’
m
I rapidly pushed a chairfor H erRoyal Highness into the very
f ront centre ofthe box an d the Princess seate d hersel f
, ; There
came a roar as she appeared an d the Regent glanced up ; ,

then I saw his j aw f all an d his florid cheeks gro w yellow .

The Emperor ofR ussi a on his right whi spe red a question
in to his ear that he was too fl urried to reply to an d the ,

King of Prussia who had recogn i sed my Mistress buried his

, ,

nose in his s n uff-box .

206 THE QUE EN CAN D O NO WR ON G
Next to the Royal box was another very large one wherein ,

were grouped a mass ofR oyal Persons an d Minor Prin ces an d

m—
distinguished en the Princes of Oldenburg Saxe Co burg -
, ,

Bavari a Wurtem burg the Princes R oyal Frederick H enry

, , , , ,

William an d Augustus ofPrussia the Hereditary Pri n ce of

, ,

O ran ge (the same whom the Princess Charlotte was engaged

to ) the D uke of Orleans the D uke of Saxe -Wei ar
, , m ,

Marshal Bl ucher an d the D uke of Wellington. I n the

,

R oyal box was the G ran d D u chess Catherine of Oldenb urg ,

the D uchess ofYo rk the Princess Sophi a the Duke ofYo rk

, , ,

an d several co urtiers in the rear. Never bef ore had the eyes
ofth at generation beheld su ch a gal axy ofRoyal ty as on that
memorable night
But there was one person absent that had a right pre
eminent to be there an d that was the Princess Charlotte
, ,

Heiress Presumptive to the Throne ofEngland. Her father

had cau sed her to be con fi n ed at Warwick Hou se where she ,

lived under the strict surveill ance of the Duchess of Lee d s ,

an d was t reated more like a child than a Princess come to

those years when she might have sat on the throne an d wielded
the sceptre by l aw but for two lives.
And now one word for the Ho use as it is called which
,
”

was the most brilli ant ever known in the history of the
Opera. The building was comparati vely new having been ,

erected to replace the old one burnt down in 1793 . It con

tain ed fi ve tiers of boxes each cu rtained according to the

m
,

f as hion ofthe N capolitan theatre s an d the f, ronts of the

p ainted in compartments a blue groun d with broad gold
m
,

f ra es that gl ittered like act u al metal an d reflected the

m m
,

l ustre fro the chandeliers an d irrored candel abra. The

roo f w as dome sh aped an d p ainted to resemble a su
-
, nset sky ,

with crim son an d flame colo ur predominating E verything

m
.

was rich a n ifi cen t an d su rp assing what the im agination

, g ,

esteemed possible in architectural an d decorative art. The

pit held 800 the boxes 900 an d the gallery 800 people on
m
, ,

an ordin ary night ; b ut on this occasion it was esti ated

208 T HE QUEEN CAN D O NO WRONG
tured in mblear or m
in wax. And two thousan d
oulded
throats roaring at her in welcome !
F or God s sake You r Highness respond to this rece tion
’ ’
, p ,

whi spered Sir Willi am Gell .

She j ust let her bl ue eyes sneer at him f m
their co ers. m
m
ro
Sir Willi a was still in disgrace .
Dear Mad am I entreat you to vouchsafe one courtesy
, ,
’

said Lady C . Campbell . S uppose they take of f ence

At that the Princess tu rned her f ace slowly ro u nd to the
l ad y in waiting.
- -

My dear Punch s wi fe is nobody ven Pun ch himse lf is

,
’

present she said with a smile that was a scorn an d pointed ly

,
’
, ,

jerked her head in the direction of the Prince Re gent s box ’

,

her f ace t u rned to the Ho u se so that al l co u ld see it an d ,

a h u
t o sa nd s
py
-
gl asses di rected on her.

We shall be hissed said Sir Will iam Gell timorously as

,
’
,

f rom one or two of the boxes came ominou s so u nds an d an ,

indig nant stirring amongst thei r occupants.

No no said the Princess turning hal fround an d in
, ,
’
, ,

d ul gin g in a real smile f or the fi rst time . I know my

b usiness better d an to take de morsel out of my husban d s ’

mouth . ’

All this time the excitement was increasing rather than

su bsiding an d the applause growing uproari ous as though
, ,

Pit an d Gallery were in league to compel the Prin cess to

acknowledge the co pliment so ob vio u m sly i n te nded f or her.

The m usicians stro ve to strike up the overture but they were ,

d ro wned in indignan t dissent. The d rama pre paring behind

the green curtain was nothing to thi s hu an d rama perfor m m
in g in f ront of it . H u sban d an d Prince ofal l the Lan d on

the right scorn ed wife an d persecuted Princess on the left ;

the most potent Sovereigns an d Royalties ofE urope spec
tators London Society an d Fashion in the boxes silent an d ,

su bservient to the Re gent ; an d London s citi z ens shouting

’

themselves hoarse to show their sympathy with Her Royal

Highn ess.
 THE BE ARDING OF THE R EGENT 209

It hath been said that The Fi rst Gentlem an in E urope was

g i f
ted with a wond ro us tact a n d the very finest m anners an d ,

with a smile that could not be bettered . The situation was

becoming acute when he v aliantly plunged into the breach
,

Rising to his f eet his portly bosom swelled out an d blaz ing
,

with orders his plump white hand pressed to his heart his
, ,

elegant dark wig distingui shed by the curl he had invented ,

bending low an d low an d low he emitted one ofthose superb

,

sal u tes for which he was famous. F or would youbelieve it ?

,

he assumed the applause to be intend ed for himsel f an d ,

bowed his gracefullest fat fop that he was.

And now mark you how this was translated by the
obseq uio us flatterers an d toadies an d sycophants by whom he
was worshipped . It was in stantly noi sed ab ro ad that H is

R oyal an d Gracious an d Elegant an d Polite an d Well

dressed an d Faultlessly -wigged an d Perfect Highness had
bowed to his w e.
if And w as ever a d eed done ( as ked h is

courtiers) so transcending in beauty an d magn animity an d

chival ry an d taste an d exemplary charity ?
The truth being that in his ridiculous van ity with the ,

very back s of those cheering turned to him this immaculate

,

m aster o fFashion appropriated the appl ause for him sel f!

But Russia on his right an d Prussi a on his lef t bent their
heads low to hide the crim son flush of shame on their
Imperi al an d Royal faces. And Bl ucher peering round ,

from the adjoining box tu , gged his rugged moustache with a

curl of contempt on his ro ugh honest features. And the
,

D uke of Wellington with his strawberry -leaves fresh in his

,

mind standing to attention was striving not to see the

, ,

comedy that covered his mas ter with such contempt.

It was said in society that the Princess sho uld have ri sen
an d ret u rned thi s salu te to her an d she was blamed an d
,

abu sed an d vil ifi ed f or omitting to do so. But I say she

acted right . And I was a close an d critical spectato r of the

whole incident The Prin ce bo wed to the audience not to

.
,

the Princess. And seeing his obj ect an d his deportment an d ,

14
2 10 TH E Q UEEN CAN D O NO WRONG
m ifi
the agn ce t mile
n s o f selfsatisfaction upon his visage, no
-

woman , m u ch l ess his insul ted w ife, could have retained an y

-respect had she assu
sel f med the bow intended for a salutation
to hersel f an d demeaned hersel fby returning it.
,

After thi s the audience allowed the perform an ce to begin .

But al l throu gh that evening the Princess rigid an d relent ,

less sat in the f

, ront ofher box her eye s fi xin g the Prince
,

Re gent an d never wandering otherwhere. I tell youit was

,

awf ul that concen trated gaz e ofscorn contempt an d hatred

, , ,

with which she bathed him sitting there between an Emperor

m
,

an d a King — a big sto u t an m ade shrivelled small an d

m
, , ,

mean by that conspicuo us stare he could not escape f ro .

I fglance s could kill he m ust have died a thousand deaths ;

,

iff rown s tortu re end u

, red a million agonies ; ifslink ing eyes
could secure escape his must have carried him to the North
,

Pole or the centre of Africa. It was a silent duel between

m an an d wi f
e an d
, the wife for once— perhaps the on ly tim e
—
in her unhappy li fe scourged her husband . And I vow to
outhe P rince Regent cu t a ve ry sorry fi gure.
y
—
Grassini was singing the famous ever-green Grassini who , ,

had q ueened it on these boards almost as long as Mrs.Jordan ,

the wi fe of the D uke of Clarence (afterwards known as

Willi am the Fourth b ut more commonly as Silly Billy had
,

q ueened it on the board s of Covent Garden Theatre where ,

this very year she bowed her farewell to the p u blic without
a a f
the exalted p tron ge o her brother in l aw the Prin ce
- -
,

R egent . Grassini was singing an elderly Frenchwoman who, ,

exaggerated the short waist ofthe period an d m ad e a cari ,

catu re of her fi gu re which was f , ormed by nature graceful

enough . But she could act an d did act this night before
,

that brilliant audience although the richn ess had gone out of
,

her voice an d showed hersel f a true an d time-serving actress

,

u —
by bowing to eve ybody in the ho e saving the Prin cess of
r s

Wales
But the Princess ne ver looked at her ; she had her own
—
part to act. In the front centre ofher box to her it had
2 12 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
those amongst them who had courted her an d deserted her , ,

an d betrayed her ! And as I proudly escorted my P rin cess

onward the cheers rang out in an overwhelming wel come
m
, ,

an d — well I tell you J immy Rabbit was the p ro u

, dest an
in London that night.
There was some delay in getting to Her Highn ess s carriage ’
,

for the l esser R oy alties were blocking the way the little

m
,

Wurte burger hopping about in the vestibule like a grass

hopper the Princelings of Prussia cl ustered like a litter of
m
,

piglings fussy Mette ich an d elegant Lichtenstein an d the

,

rest ofthe gal axy of co u rtiers an d diplom atists j ostling each

other. And there was Marshal Blucher who seemed to me ,

to be waiting for someb ody an d it was for my Princess.

,

No sooner had he caught sight ofher descending the last

flight ofstairs than thi s veteran ofa hun dred victories per
f ormed one ofthe worthi est actions ofhis life .
F or he cleared the way f or her with his heavy hand l aid
,

indi scriminatingly on Prince an d noble an d commoner. And

as she passed b the grim old warrior stru ck by a su dden
y , ,

imp ulse he could not an d wo uld not control drew himselfup ,

to attention an d sal uted the daughter ofthe Black Brun s

,

wicker who had died on the fi el d ofbattle f or Pru ssi a s King .

’

Her Royal Highness d ropped my ar an d stepping m , ,

conspicuously forward gave him a co urtesy that honoured

,

Bl ucher an d rewarded him more than did the bl ue ribbon

which but two days before the Prince Regent had fastened
, ,

on his shoulders with his own august hand

m
.

Once again the Marshal sal uted his oustachio d face ,

’

crim son with pride at the compliment paid him .

Silence had reigned for the few seconds during which this
dramatic incident was being enacted . And then a louder
hurri cane ofcheers burst out an d amidst this sal ute which
, ,

cannon could not have bettered the Princess ofWales took

m
,

my ar again an d I led her to her coach.

,

I saw her ia an d L ad y Charlotte Campbell after her an d

, ,

then at her command again took my place on the front seat

, ,
 T HE BEAR DIN G OF THE RE GENT 213

as I had done in coming . And so— with Marshal Bl ucher

still standing to attention— we drove of f
.

Our right f ul way led by Charles S treet an d the coachm an ,

attempted it ; b ut the crowd ofcarriages collected there was

so immense that it was impossible to f orce a pas sage through .

Wherefore the horses were backed with great d if fi cul ty an d ,

thei r heads turned towards Pall Mall which carried us past ,

the open space in front of the splendid Corinthian facad e

ofCarlton Ho u se who se windo ws were ablaz e with light .
,

The mob had learnt who was in the carri age when it left
the Opera House an d now recogni sed the vehicle by the
,

u
co o r ofthe horses which were a pai r offi n el y dappled grays
l ,
-
,

with the Brun swick colours l n thei r rosettes. Instantly the

eople surr o unded the c i ge p re ing clo ser an d closer
p arr a ss ,

with the wildest enthusiasm an d crying out Long live the

, ,

Princess ofWales ! Long live the Innocent .

A minute l ater one bold varlet grasped at the handle an d
opened the carri age door. I rose in my seat an d rai sed my
hand to thrust him back an d shut the door again when H er ,

R oyal Highness interposed an d standing in the doorw ay

,

the carriage proceeding at a slow walk— submitted hersel f to

shakin g h ands with tho se that p ressed f orward to secure the
honour.
H e that had the audacity to open the doo r was fi rst
honoured an d as the Princess releas ed her grasp ofhis great
,

fi st he clapped it to his mouth an d gave the palm a reso unding

, ,

kis crying God bless the Innocent Princess she hath shook
s , ,
—
it . an d ki ssed it again scre aming in his excitement
,
God ,

bless the Innocent Princess God bless the Innocent Princess

. .

H is success thus publ icly adverti sed enco uraged a hun d red
others to make a bid for similar gracious favour an d they ,

pressed forward for the chance. And then one burly ruf iian
roared ou t
Say b ut the word Your Royal Highness an d we ll b urn
’

, ,

down Carlton House an d the Prince Re gent an d the whole

,

bag oftricks
214 T HE Q UEEN CAN D O NO WRONG
An d the cry was took up Aye aye ! Burn down Carlton
, ,

Ho use ! Down with the Regent

It as come to danger. We were but t o stone thro w
w w s - ’

from the Prince s residence whither he had retu rned with

’
,

Thei r Majesties ofR ussia an d Prussia. It needed b ut a word

from the Princess f or the th reat to be put into execution .
And there flashed to my memory the expression ofher un for
giving eyes as she looked at the Regent that night !
Bu t she was eq u al to the occasion . Leaning half ou t of
the carri age she held up her hand with an action ofcomm and .
No no my goot people she cried an d the voice ofher
, , , ,

instantly hushed the bab el of the multitude . I do tan k

yo u from de bottom of my heart B ut b
e q uiet—
. be
q uite
q uiet ! I entreat you let me pass an d go home to your ,

beds. ’

Way for the Princess roared the same burly ruflian wh o

had suggested burning down Carlton House an d sprang to ,

the heads of the horses. Way for the Princes s of Wales !

Long live the Princess of Wales ! Way for the Innocen t
Prince ss ofWales
And leani n g still further out ofthe open door H er High
m m
, ,

ness called to the an who was b ut a co mon labouring

,

fellow :
I do tank you sir an d please get me on my way home .
, ,
’

Twenty minutes later we were passing thro ugh Tyburn

turnpike an d a few yards brought us to Connaught House .
,

For hal f the di stance the mob had f ollowed the carriage ,

acclaimi n g the Prin cess with enth u si astic cheers but as the ,

streets gre w clearer the coachm an whipped the gallant gray s

‘

ou an d we lef t our escort of London s Citi z ens behind still ’

, ,

breathless] y crying aft er the carriage Way for the Innocent,

Princess
I had to assi st Her Royal Highness up the stairs of Con
n aught Ho use into the great d rawing-room for she was ,

overwrought with excitement an d overfatigued

 CHAPTE R XV II
T H E N AT I O N S I D O L ’

T HE incident of the Opera House where the Prince an d

,

Princess of Wales sat for three hours face to face af t er the

formers public declaration that he would never meet her
’

again , an d where the outcast wi fe was exalted by the

populace at the expense of her R oyal husband was the ,

end of that chapter in Caroline s life which registered sub

’

mission to inj ustice an d humili ation .

H er Royal Highness had long wished to withdraw f rom

En gland an d reti re to her native Bru nswick or to some

,

secl uded spot on the sunny shores of the Mediterranean ,

where she might secure that mental peace an d respect denied

her in the country over which she was destined to be Q ueen
consort. But several con siderations stood in the way. The
opposition ofher husband in the fi rst pl ace ; in the second
, ,

the earn est entreaties of her dau ghte r that she would not
exil e hersel f in the thi rd her own pro ud spi rit that could not
,

brook the idea ofan yline ofaction which savoured ofretreat

from a po st ofd if ficul ty. And there were monetary considera
tions as well that cramped her freedom an d powers oftravel .
,

The Princess Charlotte suf ered also f

f rom the tyran nical

behaviour of the Prince Re gent. I do not think it is untrue

to say that in his secret soul he ever disliked her because
, , ,

she was her mother s dau ghter. When she grew up an d

’

evinced a disposition to side with her mother agai n st him that ,

aversion increased . Af ter her marriage he is stated to have

2 16 1
 2 17
’
T HE NATION S IDOL
let drop the remark : A child of the Princess Caroline shall
never sit upon the throne And although thi s report comes
from an u ntrustworthy source the events I a about to re
, m
late will serve to show that the remark was not out ofkee ping
with the paternal prej u dice ofhim to who it was imp uted . m
Y ouknow how it was arranged that Her R oyal Highness ,

the Prin cess Charlotte shoul d m arry the Prince of O range

, ,

son an d hei r to the potentate who af ter ninetee n years of

,

exile from his States had upon the defeat of B uonaparte

m
, , ,

retu rned to the an d assu med the title ofKing ofHolland

— that being an era when Kings were m an uf actu red as you ,

might call it by the wholesale . The Prince Re gent was

,

ardently desi rou s of the match which he had long been

,

pressing upon his daughter. I f you m ust know the reas on

why it was becau
, se her popu larity was a constant chagrin to
w —
him . She as the Nation s Idol the Ri si n g Sun in his
’

hemi sphere . Whil st she remained in England her m other s ’

hands were strengthened both by the m atern al relationship

,

an d by the dau ghter s loyalty to her mother. To marry his

’

daughter to the Prince of Orange an d secure her removal

m
,

fro the kingdom was the Prince Regent s chiefobject n o w. ’

,

When the match was fi rst proposed the intention was that
the Princess Charlotte should reside abroad but thi s she ,

rejected with spi rit . Where upon it was agreed she should
not be taken out ofEnglan d witho ut her consent or detained ,

abroad longer than she chose . Ou these term s she yielded

to her father s wi shes an d received the Prince of O range

’
,

her accepted suitor.

At which j unct ure there stepped upon the scene a Royal
diplomatist who contrived to undo al l that the Prince Regent
had done . F or althou gh it co uld not be said that there was
an y affection between the Princess Charlotte an d her fian cé ,

the match was d efin itel y arranged an d publicly announced ,

an d in high af fai rs ofState when su ch alliances are settled

,

it requires an uncommon courage to repudiate them .

William perhaps the most d esirabke. ,
 CHAPTE R XV II
T H E N AT I O N S I D O L ’

T HE incident of the Opera House where the Prince an d

,

Princess ofWales sat for three hours face to face after the
formers public declaration that he would never meet her
’

again , an d where the o u tcast wife was exal ted by the

populace at the expen se of her R oyal husb and was the
,

end of that chapter in Caroline s li fe which regi stered sub

’

mission to inj ustice an d humili ation .

H er R oyal Highness had long wished to withdraw f ro m
Engl and an d retire to her native Brunswick or to some ,

secl uded spot on the sunny shores of the Med iterranean ,

where she might secure that mental peace an d respect denied

her in the country over which she was destined to be Q u een
consort. But several con siderations stood in the way. The
opposition ofher husband in the fi rst place ; in the second
, ,

the earnest entreaties of her d au ghter that she would not

exil e hersel f in the thi rd her own pro ud spi rit th at could not
,

brook the idea ofan yline ofaction which savoured ofretreat

from a post ofd if ficul ty. And there were monetary considera
tions as well that cram ped her freedom an d powers oftravel .
,

The Princess Charlotte suf fered also from the tyrannical

behaviour of the Prince R egent. I do not think it is untrue
to say that in his secret soul he ever di sliked her because
, , ,

she was her mother s dau ghter. When she grew up an d

’

evinced a di sposition to side with her mother agai n st him that ,

aversion increas ed . Af ter her marriage he is stated to have

2 16 1
220 THE Q UEEN CAN D O NO WR ON G
She is above middl e height ; extreme spread for her age ; her
bosom full but fi n ely shaped ; her shoulders l arge an d her
, ,

whole person vol uptuous. Her skin is white but not a tran s ,

parent white ; there is little or no shade in her face but her ,

features are very fi n e. Thei r expression like that of her ,

general demeanour is noble. Her feet are rather smal l an d

, ,

her hand s an d arms fi n el y moulded . She has a hesitation in

her speech almost amo unting to a stammer an additional ,

proof ifan ywere wanting ofher being herfathers own child ;

, ,
’

but in everything she is his very im age . H er voice is flexibl e ,

an d its tones d u lcet except when she laughs then it becomes

,

too lo ud but is never unm usical . She seems to wish to be

,

admi red more as a lovely wom an th an a Q u een . Yet she has

a qu ickness both of fancy an d penetration an d would fain
m
,

reign despotically or I a , m uch mistaken . ’

The last word s stri ke the key note of the Princess s char
- ’

acter an d writing now when the shadows off

, , orty years have
b uried that young an d beauti ful Idol ofa nation in oblivion ,

I can truly say ofher from my own humble observation an d

,

pro found ad miration that ifshe lacked the wisdom an d tact

, ,

ofou r p resent graciou s Sovereign Lad y Q u een V ictori a ( who

su cceeded to the throne through Princess Charlotte s untimely ’

demi se) she had al l the spirit an d determination ofan Eliz a

,

beth whom she greatly admired combined with the bravery

, ,

an d the beau ty ofa Brun swicker.

Af —
ter thi s long digression for the which I do apologi z e
I mu st get me bac k to Prince L opold o S axe Coburg who
f -

m
e ,

had f allen in love with this love] y R oy al da sel . Bu t not

she with him —at that time . Bu t if an ything rathe r the, ,

contrary . She was civil but cold to him . He on his part

, , ,

tried every device to entrap her attention an d win her regard ,

riding ostentatiou sly near her in the Park when she was

taking her airing in her carri age an d never missing an oppor

,

tu n it ofbeing there to p u sh him sel finto observation. Once

y
an d once only he called at Warwick Ho u se an d had tea with ,

the Princess an d the Duchess ofLeeds an d Mi ss Knight who ,

 THE NATION S IDOL 22 1
’

were her governesses but obtained no encouragement an d the

, ,

visit was never repeated . And he was very forlorn over it

al l as is the way with Ge rm an Princelings when they are
,

foiled in thei r matrimonial ambition s.

An d out ofthis co plete f ail um
re ofwooing Cal u ny in that , m ,

Court where lies an d intrigue ruled supreme set to work to ,

b uild up a scandal The toadies trimmed their sails to scud

before the most favourable gale an d knowing that the Prince
,

R egent was incensed again st his d aughter f or breaking of f

the Orange m atch an d more particul arly because of the
,

reasons assigned f or it the u nso ught I might almost put it

, ,

the rej ected attention s ofPri n ce Leopold an d the single vi sit

m
, ,

ofceremony he paid to Warwick Ho u se were agn ifi ed an d,

multiplied an d Charlot te s coldness chan ged into an almost

,
’

criminal warmth by the time the reports ofthese slanderers

reached Carlton Ho u se . No one who has not lived an d
served at the wings of the Theatres Royal Carlton House , ,

Connaught House an d Warwick Ho use can conceive the

,

vill ai n ous plotting spying intrigue lying conspiracy an d

, , , , ,

calumny which honeycombed those pl aces.

And so to my story (an d be damned to me for an old d ry
as-du st I hear ou say l ) which see m s to be steering some
, y ,

what like a ship without a rudder.

It was eight ofthe clock of the evening ofT uesday the
12 th ofJu l y an d the sun j ust setting ; f
, or I remember I was

watchin g its crim son glow silhouetting the bl ack tree-tops

that hid the prospect of the Palace of Spies as my frie n d ,

Colonel Surges hath chri stened Ken sington Pal ace in the
book he wrote . The Princess of Wales accompanied by
m
,

Lad y Charlotte Lind say an d Sir Willia Gell had gone to ,

Montague House Blackheath to transact some business. I

m
, ,

was on d u ty an d awaiting the return of y Mi stress. Mr.

,

Keppel Craven her other equerry had obtained her per

, ,

mission (an d mine) to take Annette an d Wi n some to the

Opera where his mother had her box . And so it happened
,

there was no one left in Connaught House b ut Jimmy Rabbit.

222 T HE Q UEEN CAN D O NO WR ON G
I waslolling on the balcony that runs in front of the
drawing-room an d dining -roo m (they being on the fi rst floor ,

in order to obtain a full an d uninterrupted view ofthe Park ) ,

when to my am az emen t I saw a common hac kney coach

, ,

d rive up an d the Princess Charlotte Open the door herself

,

an d j ump out an d the n stand f or a moment extract ing a

m
,

guinea from her purse to pay an d discharge the an .

Y ou ay be su mre I was do wn or ever she co u ld knock an d
ring an d opened the door f or her.

m
,

Oh Mr. Rabbit she cried as she recognised me I a

, ,
’
, ,

so glad to see
you I h ave ru n aw ay f rom home And she

d ashed pas t me into the hal l with a laugh so hysterical that

it well -nigh ended in tears.
I was d umfounded at this intelligence.
Where is my mother P she asked . ”

She hath gone to Montague House . ’

Oh what a mi sfortune ! Who is in the house i

,
”

No one save mysel f. ’

A couple of l ackeys attracted by the converse in the

m
,

hall n ow ade thei r appearance. Whereupon she said

,

to me
Come upstairs Mr. Rabbi t. I wish to see youin private ’

m
, ,

an d preceded e u the fli ht two steps at a time with an

p g , ,

ag ility youwo u ld not have given her cred it for.

r r -
Ente ing the d wing room fi rst she stood by the door
a , ,

her hand on the handle an d motioning me inside closed it , , , ,

an d leaned her b ack ag ain st it as tho u gh to imprison me .

Mr. Rabbit she said I have b ,
’
roke with my f ather !
,

He has been to Warwick House to -d ay with the Bishop of

Sali sb ury lecturing an d hectoring me an d accusing me ofal l
m
, ,

so rts ofcondu ct ofwhich I a innocent an d I have rebelled . ’

,

She folded her arm s on her ample bosom with a gesture that
was R epu blican in its suggestion an d her head cocked on one ,

side the chin as l ant an d d efian tl tilted

, y .

Vi n e l a Lib erté ! she cried L a L iberté L a L ib

’
erté

m
,

I a a runaway Princess. I have thrown of fthe yoke ofthe

22 4: THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O NG
Then youshall never go she cried . Y oum ust sto p an d ’

m
,

an d p rotect me Mr. Rabbit . Send a g room to urge

m
, y
— —
other to return with a l speed . An d an d she reflected for
l
a moment
y es send f or Mr. Bro u gh
,
a an d Mi ss M ercer m ,

Elphinstone . I will order din n er an d we will have a—a—a

m m
m
,

-merry evenin g —s he wo u nd up with her pretty sta er

‘
a m
-merry evening even ifit is my l ast
,

Madam I said I beg ofyoube discreet. In thi s crisis

,
’
,

it were best to call one ofYo ur R oyal Highness s uncles ’

‘ —
York Clarence ? I hate them . They insult y other. mm
And poor old Uncle S ussex with his big hand s— well
m
, ,

perhaps you are right Mr. Rabbit. I will write hi a note ,

to come. He can do no harm — an d no go od . She ’

passed to a table an d scribbled of fa f ew lines f old ed the

m
,

sheet wrote a superscription an d tossed it to e . Send

m
, ,

that to my u ncle Sussex . And other groom s for my other

an d Mr. Brou gham . Don t look so nervous Shimmy . Go ’

m
,

! I p o i e u u h ll not get into scrape f thi

m
g o r s o o s a a or
y y s.

An d order d inner. I a dying ofhunger. I shall stop here

until it is read y an d ifthey send old Salisbury af, ,
ter me I
shall be able to see him cre eping u n d I ll hide u nde my ’

m
p a r ,

mother s bed so yo ull know where to fi n d e. An d n ow

’

,
’
,

offyougo And Vi n e l a L ib erté

She opened the door for me an d gave e an i mpulsive m

p ush out of it an d then banged the door after me an d or
,

ever my foot was on the f irst step of the downward flight I

caught the sound ofa hysterical gust ofsobbing.
T he impul se came to me to retu rn an d af ford her my
as si stan ce b ut on ref
, lection I thought fi rst that she was , ,

no wom an to care to be seen weeping ; an d secondly that in , ,

her unhappy an d highly w rought state a good letting of

-
tears would be a welcome an d soothing sed ative . So to obey
her comm ands : the letter to be despatched to the D uke of
S ussex a galloping groom for the Princess a second to brin g
, ,

Mr Brougham a thi rd for Miss Mercer Elphinstone an d

. , ,

dinner ordered to be served when the bell ran g.

 THE NATION S IDOL ’
225

I do not kno w whether my cantankerous mouth had a

sti rring effect on the groom s to hurry a folk none too prone
to agility an d despatch but this is certain the Princess of
, ,

Wales Mr Brougham an d Mi ss Elphinstone were al l in

, . ,

C onn aught House by a quarter to nine ofthe clock . My

Mi stress (met on the road) had on receipt ofthe intelligence
, ,

de vi ated from her ro u te an d gon e to the Parliament House

to seek the ad vice of Mr. Whitbread an d E arl Grey but was ,

unab le to fi n d them So she came home very ag itated

. ,

an d Lady Charlotte Lind say applying smelling-salts to her

nose .
Shimmy she cried to me (who was on the watch an d
,
”

opened er carriage door) vot ofCharley P

h -
,
’

u f
B t the Princess Charlotte who rom the drawing room ,
-

balcony had spied her mother coming reached the carri age on ,

my heels an d answered for herself.

,

T is well dear mamm a. And Vi va la L ib she cried

’
, erté ,

to the intense as tonishment oftwo stran ge gentlemen who

chanced to be passing.
V ot does al l d is mean Charl ey asked the Princess of
,

Wal es. I vow youhafgiven me such a scare d at I do not

‘

tink my heart vil l ever stop tumping

My father has discharged all my ladies an d my servants .
He has placed Lad y R osslyn an d Lad y Ilchester over me ! I
am to be impri soned in Cranbourne Lodge in the middl e of ,

Winds or Forest for the rest of my nat ural li fe with a vi sit

m
, ,

once a week from granny the grim ! So I a in strict

rebellion an d Vi n e l a L ib
, erté She poured out the news.
Hush cried my Mi stress sternly ; youdo forget yourself ‘
,

Charley . Here is dan ger. D is is de most imprudent ting d at

could ever he d id . It vill be laid to my accoun t. ’

Just then up drove Mr.Brougham very fl urried . And at ,

once insisted on the Princess an d her daughter retiring to

the drawing-room for a consultation . Meanwhile Sir Wil l iam ,

Gell an d Lady Charl otte Lindsay drew me into the bl ue

boudoir an d m ad e me tell them al l that had happened .
,

15
226 T HE QUEEN CAN D O NO WRON G
Scarce had I fi n ished doing so than a lackey ca e to m
an nou nce dinner an d we al l adj ourned upstai rs an d took
m
,

ou r seats. There was only the house party who I have

mentioned an d Miss Mercer Elphinstone who arrived whilst
, ,

I was in the bl ue boudoir. The Princess Charlotte was

di splaying a forced gaiety an d beh aving in a vivacious even
, ,

au dacious way try ing to carry 0 1? the grave situation she

, ,

Madam she cried to her mother you are nearer the

,
”

Throne than I . Do you represent Royalty at the head of

the table an d I will be the New Republic at the foot
,

So sayi n g she ordered a gl ass of wine an d tossed it of f

m
, , ,

an d gained m u ch service fro it. F or thereafter she was

like a bird escaped fro its cage reckless an d jesting withm , ,

—
everyone even with Mr. Brougham whose face was as grav e ,

as a traged y an d him sel f m ani f

,estly incommoded at the

situation .

We lingered long over the meal after the custom of the

m
,

house with the yo ung Princess flashing her wit an d hu our

,

at u s an d am u
, sing everyone even the very lackeys with h er , ,

uip a d allie an d drolleries that were never excell ed b

q s n s s
y ,

Mr. Bani ster or her ill ustri ous Aunt the big-voiced merry , , ,

bustling Mrs. J ordan . I tell you she charmed the furrowed ,

forehead s smooth an d before the peaches were on the cloth

, , ,

m ade a rare comedy ofthat which was really a tragedy .

At h al -
fp ast nine of the clock there came a kn ock at th e

door an d it was Miss Knight the Princess Charlotte s gover

, ,
’

ness breathless an d afi righted to as kif H er Royal Highness

'

, ,

were at Connaught House. No sooner told Y es than she ,

’

turned an d dived back into the equi page that had bro ught
her with orders to gallop back .
,

Poor Cordelia was al l her pupil observed when this visit

was reported . I fshe skipped into her chai se as youdescri b e ,

Mr. R abbit I fear she hath exposed more bl ue stocking than

,

the critics will pu t up with .

m
’

The which was an unkind hit at a very worthy har less ,

 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O N G
which she tol d him with great restraint on her period s that
, ,

Ib elieve your Lord ship knows that severity ofan y k in d rather

inj ures than d oes a cause good with me whereas kindness
m
,

a do a good d eal . A d then p oc ed d to state h er case

’

y n r e e ,

an d deno u —
nce her cal umniators whom she kne w an d so was
m
,

able to a i her sh af ts charged with a personal f orce.

Notwithstanding the D uchess of Leeds was infor ed the
, m
next morn ing ofher di smissal from the post ofGovern ess to
the Princess an d the Prince Regent sign ifi ed his in tention
,

ofcalling at Warwick Ho u se at six to bring his d au ghter to

book .
He came with the Bi shop of Salisbury an d was cl oseted
,

with Charlotte for three-quarters ofan hour d uring which ,

he told her she m ust m arry the Prince of Oran ge. At

the end of this protracted interview the Princess Charlotte
,

ru shed ou t of the room an d to that in which Miss Knight

was awaiting her in a state of the greatest an g u
, ish ,

an d told Miss Knight that new lad ies were appointed an d ,

actu ally in possession ofWarwick Ho u se ; that she was to be

con fi n ed at C arlton Ho u se till the f ollowing Monday an d ,

then sent und er charge of her new ladies to Cranbourne

, ,

Lodge in the middle ofWind sor Forest with no one to see

, ,

her b ut the Q ueen once a week ; an d not to receive a vi sitor

or letter

And having reported all thi s fell on her knees an d p rayed

, ,

God Almighty give me patience

At thi s moment there came an u sher to Miss Knight to

command her to the Prince R egen t s presence to receive her

con gé . This was briefly an d summarily given an d she
m
,

retu rned to try an d co f ort the Princess Charlotte on l y to ,

fi n d her missing !
A search was instantly made througho ut the house b ut ,

with no success. The Heiress Presumptive ofthe Throne of

m
England had ysten ousl y vanished .
In a deathly fear an d trembling Miss Knight returned to
m
the roo where the Prince Re gent was still debating th e
 22 9
’
THE NATION S IDOL
mtte
a with the Bi shop ofSalisbury an d told him she feared
r ,

H er R oyal Highness had fled f rom Warwick Hou se !

Fled ! By God I
‘ ’
m
gl ad to hear it he cried evincing
m
, ,

pleas ure by his anner Now everybody will see what she
.

is an d nobody will m arry her

m
,

An d he as her f
w ather— the First an d the ost dissol ute
Gentl em an in E urope ! By Heavens when I think of how
m
,

thi s Prin ce treated his wi fe an d his daughter not to ention ,

his f rien d s his mi stresses an d his m any yo u

,
ng fem ale victim s
, ,

I wonder how the Briti sh Mon archy ever survived for Silly
Billy to fi l l the thron e !
Poor little mincing blue-stockin g d Miss Knight retorted ’

m
,

with j ust that amo unt of a i able indignation you might

expect from a lady who wrote the book s she d id .
’
Pho pho pi shed the Prince Regent . Don t be a damned
, ,
’

f Coburg s
’
ool wom an Go nd fi d h G t S w -

m
, a n e r. o o a e

l odgin g s Sen d e word when you have run the gi rl to

.

earth . I have to d ine at York s. Call there with your report ’

at eleven .
Well that poor overbrained little creature Miss Knight
, , ,

went fi rst to Prince Leopold s but no Princess Charl otte ’

,

there (as how could she be who i n herited the pride of Q ueen
Eliz abeth not the shamele sness ofher father
, then to the
s

Q ueen s Pal ace at B uckingham House an d acquainted Her

’
,

Maj esty ofthe direful news. Whereat Q ueen Charlotte who ,

was playing lon g whi st f or sixpenny points broke u her

p ,

card party An d fi n al l y to Connaught House whereto if

. , ,

she had possessed an y sen se she wou ld have gone or sent an

, ,

express messen ger in the fi rst instance . An d there lingered a

q uarter of a minute to be assured the Princess was in the
flesh under her mother s roof an d so back to B ucki n gham
’

House at a gal lop to acq uaint the Q ueen an d then to York ,

House al l in a terrible fear an d trembling to acquaint the

, ,

bereaved father !
There she was set to wait whil st the Prince R egent fi n ished
his wine which took hi, an hou m
r an d might h ave waited ,
230 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
longer but that the Queen arrived an d burst in t o the
, ,

dining room raving an d storming at her favourite son

-
,

famou sly an d ordering Mi ss Knight to be sent f

, or who ,

came an d piped her tale of woe an d was dismi ssed ; an d ,

then in her practical way or at least the practical way

, , , ,

of poetesses ret urned to Warwick Ho u

, se an d ordere d Mrs. ,

Le wi s the Princess Charl otte s dresser (a spy placed in that

,
’

situation by the Prince R egent ) to attend her to Con n au ght ,

House with the Princess s nightgo wn ! ’

Kind God ! Of such are blue-stockin g d women in the ’

hour ofcri sis

So m uch for Mi ss Knight s story up to half-past eleven . ’

A word for what happened at the Duke ofYork s but thi s ’

,

being only hearsay I do not presume to vouch for it. The

,

Q ueen insisted upon a council being called an d Lord s Eldon

m
,

an d Ellenboro u gh ( yold friend ofthe Delicate Investigation )

m
were su moned to attend . And Lord Ellenboro ugh gave it
as his opinion th at a Writ of H ab eas Corpus sho uld b e

instantly i ssued an d the person of the Runaway Princess

,

d em anded f rom her mother !

At the which Q ueen Charlotte gave her opin ion decisively
My Lord Chie fShustice you are von d a fool . T is a , m ‘

vi i de h il d v an t
pp gn s s

Hear ! hear echoed the Prince R egent, who was dee p

in his cups ; I always said Ell-l el l -l en borough was a d a
damned ff-fool
- ’

m
.

Si re protested the Lord ChiefJustice drawing hi self

,
’
,

up very sti f f.
— —
There there there ! Sit down the Prince comm anded ’

m mm
,

—
him . York d a da n it ! youre sobboberer than
- - - e
’

what s to be d -done i
’ "

Shend for her said the Duke ofYork , who was n ot so

,
’

sober as his au gust brother in ferred .

Well she11-for-er-then said the Prince Re gent pouring
,
’

,
’
,

him se l fout another bumper ofport.

23 2 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O N G

House where were high pn ks going on

, The spi rits of the
P rin cess Charlotte had in f ected the whole househ o ld an d at
m
,

eleven o clock when the compan y rose fro the din ner-table
’
, ,

even Mr. Brougham notwithstand ing he had bee n un usually

,

abstemio u s was smiling gravely ifgrimly th ro u

, , gh the frowns ,

that furrowed his heavy thoughtful bro w. ,

At hal f-past eleven o clock Mi ss Knight an d M rs. Lewis

’

arrived a nd the Princess sent word the f

, ormer w as to be
instantly admitted to the d rawing-room whither we had al l
m
,

adj ou ed . She on being question ed poured forth her tale

m
, ,

with hysterical vol ubility declari n g that a Writ of H ab

, eas

Ca u s was now bein g i ssued an d the Carlton House G uards

,

would be here within hal fan ho ur to execute it. I do th ink

she was a trifle demented an d perf ectly so a little later.
,

No sooner had M iss Knight f ini shed her moving recital of

al l she had been a witness to than wheel s were heard o u tside
( the d awing -room window being open f r it wa w m
m
r s o s a ar ,

night) an d the Bishop of Sal isbury arrived . He had co e

,

in a hackney coach. His arrival was announced .

Not at home an d no ad mission said Princess Charlotte
, ,
’

curtly taking the word of command out of her mother s

,
’

mouth an d contin ued some h umorous story she was

,

telling.
Five min utes later up drove another hackney coach . This
was Mr. Ad am . H e was anno u nced .
Not at home an d no admi ssion again went forth the
, ,
”

mandate.
Perhaps a quarter ofan hour passed an d a thi rd hackney ,

coach arrived . It contained my Lord ChiefJustice Ellen

boro ugh for whom the same instructions were given . And
m
, ,

l ater ou yet again the same reception to yLord Chancellor

,

Eldon an d Sir John Leach .

And then youmight see the ridiculous spectacle ofthese fi ve
counsellors ofthe Prince R egent each in his frousty hac kney
,

coach each coach d rawn up a few paces from the front-door

,

an d in a line, an d ( presently) protru ding from the wind ow

 THE NATION S IDOL ’
2 33

of a
e ch coach a pai r of shoes. For sad to rel ate Lord , ,

Chancellor Lord ChiefJustice the Bishop the Chan cellor of

, , ,

the D uchy of Cornwall an d the Knight were not so strictl y

,

wakeful as they ought to h ave been an d the port wine they ,

had dru nk had a soporifi c ef fect so that as a m atter of , ,

actual fact they al l fi ve were sleeping that night in that

,

rank of hackney coaches as m any a gentlem an overtaken

,

by his liquor has done before an d I m ake no doubt will ,

I have omitted to mention that the D uke ofSussex arrived

somewhat earlier in the evening an d was ad mitted an d shown
,

into the blue boudoir. The Princess Charlotte went down

to see him but q uickly returned declarin g Poor Uncle
, ,

Sussy was q uite impracti cable

Y ousee in those days it was a cru
, el thing to carry men ,

without notice from thei r dinner-tables into the open air

, ,

with no warning to them to keep them selves in a condition to

g o. I hear d afterw ard s the D uke of S ussex c urled hi sel fup m
on a sofa (the very one I proposed to Winsome ou) an d went
to sleep . An d so there were six of these lead ers of the
nation sleeping in an d about the premi ses that night with ,

ou t nightshi rts or nightcaps.

Two o clock came an d with it a thundering knock at the
’

door. It was the D uke ofYork .

I carried word to the Princess Charlotte that H is R oyal
Highness desi red to see her on behal f of the Queen an d the
Prince R egent. The young Princess had quite took pre
ced en ce ofher m
other this n ight an d I do think my Mistress
,

liked it for it showed the Brunswick spirit in her d aughter.

,

Accommodate the D uke in the Equerries room she ’

,
’

ordered me an d say I will attend him .

,
’

An d rose to do so. At the which Mr. Brougham rose too

m
,

an d gave her his ar .

We are now come to business Your R oyal Highness he , ,

’

sai d an d I m ust stand by u ’

m
, yo .

Thank you she said an d took his ar .

,
’
,
23 4 T H E QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
They were closeted with the Duke for some con sider
able time d u ring which as my d u
, ty req uired I stood at
, ,

attention o u tside . At last the Princess came out followed ,

by Mr. Brougham . There were tears in her eyes but when ,

she saw the l ackeys in the hall she fl u ng her head up proudly
, ,

an d swept u the stai rs to the d rawing -room where were her

p ,

mother Sir William Gell Lad y C.Lind say Mi ss Elphin stone

, , , ,

an d Mi ss Knight waiting the l atter periodically hy sterical

, ,

now praying to God to guide her aright now decl arin g that ,

the Prince R egent had grossly i n sul ted her sweet innocent ,

Princess an d constantly but f

, ru itlessly wishing she had
, ,

never been born .

As we en tered the drawing -room Mr. Brougham sign ed to
me to close the door. The Princess had passed to her
mothers side an d Mr. Brougham j oined them . There was
’

the air ofa f amily cou ncil about it. Gell an d I stood a
little apart ; Mi ss Elphinstone tried to stifle Mi ss Knight s ’

spasmodic sobs an d hicco u ghs an d L ady Charlotte Lindsay ,

kept her keen inq uiring eye on the Prin cess ofWales.
V ell ask ed my Mistress vot hafhappen ? V ot hafbeen
’
, ,
’
decided P
Nothing cried the Princess Charlotte decisively . Nothin g
,
’

—nothing -nothing. My father demands an unconditional

su rrende r. Neve r— neve r— never And she clenched her s all m
shapely fi st an d shook it at an im aginary f

m
,
oe .

V ot do youadvise Mr. F room asked, y Mi stress.

Madam an y advice I could of

,
fer would be futile I fear. ,

Her Royal Highness is not amenable to advice ; she is past it

— an d God help England he added solemnly . ,
’

H is deep bass voice an d those pregnan t word s struck l ike

the note of an organ ringing through a cathedral in a
Gregorian A I m
There was a sin cerity an d tragedy in
'

it that conveyed far more than could the most el oq uen t

m
speech .

The Princess Charlotte turned round the tears inin g , ,

un restrained now a down her cheeks.

-
,
23 6 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
borough is one your father s advi sers an d youknow youn g
of
’
, ,

as you are — y ou cannot b ut k now for you have had bette

, r
—
opportunities than an yto observe youknow the public p ulse .
Thi s election will lash it into a fren z y. To sentence a an of m
Lord Cochrane s ran kan d distingui shed public services in the
’

Navy of the Country to stand in the common pillory has

m
in fla ed the public indignation against the Lord Chief
Justice an d your Royal father for that he d id not instan tly
,

exercise his Royal Clemency an d forbid such an indecency .

To day the victim stands for re-election for Westminster ,

an d I prophesy he will be retu rned tri u mphantly . An d ifhe

is retu rned it will be tantamou nt to a public acq uittal an d ,

m ust shake the position ofy our R oyal father d angerously or

m
,

he m ust cut him sel fad ri f

t f
ro Ellenborough . ’

So far the Princess followed Mr. Brougham s speech atten ’

tivel y b ut with a little impatience . The Westminster

m
,

e lection see ed no concern ofhers until Mr.Brougham with

, ,

his incomparable m astery ofargument used it as his chief ,

weapon against her an d won his victory with it. H e went on

,

d eath ofBuon aparte. T ried b efore the Lord Ch iefJ u stice Lord C och

ran e an d others were f ou n d gu ter a su

il ty, af in g u th m
m w
m p at as

con sid ered to l acki partial ity, an d on th e z l st ofJu n e sen ten ced to

twel ve mh im i m t, an d to d in the pil l ory in f

’
t stan ron t of

m
on s p r son en

the Royal Exchan g e f or on e h ou r. Th ere were an y who hel d L ord

Cochran e to b e en tirel y in n ocen t, an d the in f a ou m

s part of the

sen ten ce created the greatest pu bl ic in d ig nation . Lord C och ran e, wh o

was mm e b er f m
or West in ster, was d eprived ofh is seat, b ut stood again ,
an d on the d ayaf ter the escapad e ofthe P rin cess Charl otte was retu rn ed
m
un opposed an d triu phan t. N ot till then d id the P rin ce Regen t,
un d er the pressure of pub m
l ic Opin ion , re it the disgracef ul part ofa
sen ten ce passed b L d E l l b u h
m
y or e n oro g .

Th is was the occasion when th e Prin ce Regen t exposed his in d in

that m uch-q uoted an ecd ote. When the fal se Col on el spread the report
that Bu on aparte was d ead , L ad y Hertf ord who was then the f avou
m
rite

istress of the Regen t, ran to His Royal Highn ess with the n ews
Y our Royal Highn ess s worst en e y is d ead
’
m An d the
m
expresse d ,

Prin ce Regen t repl ied , in word s that were an in d ex to his in d , B y

Gad ! is she ? ’
 THE NATION S IDOL 23 7
’

I but to show you to the multitude which in a few

have
hours will fi l l these streets an d that Park an d tell them yo ur ,

iev nce — I h ve bu t to show u to th at m u ltit ude an d

m
g r a s a yo ,

speak to the six words an d they will al l ri se on you

,
rb ehal f!
Then tell them she cried an d stamped ,
her f oot
imperiously . Tell them my grievances
‘

Ah Madam — reflect he beseeched her. R eflect on the

m
,

consequences. The com otion would be excessive Carlton —

Ho use would be attacked by the mob perhaps pulled down . ,

But — he pau sed a moment with the m aj esty of conscio u

, s

eloquen ce an d power an d prediction in an ho ur afterward s

the Soldiers will be called ou — —
t Bl ood will flow the People
—
will be in con flict in Reb ell ion .
’

Again he paused an d fi xed her with his wonderf

,
ul eye ,

that could hold Senates in thrall an d with his genius that ,

a f e w years l ater when this gi rl - Princess was dead an d her ,

mothers honour being assailed by George the Fourth won

’
—
a verdict f or th at mother with perhap s the most m arvellou

mm
s

speech ever delivered by an advocate . And then o ,

solemnly than ever his deep bass voice hu

, shed like the

cadence ofthunder roll ing in the distance

Mad am he said ifyour Royal Highness lives a h undred
,
’

years it will never he forgot that your flight from your

m m
,

father s hou se was the cau se of i schief. And you ay

’

depend upon it that the English people so hate an d abhor

Bloodshed that you— an d your dynasty will never sur
vive it. ’

He fi n ished speaking an d f or one minu

, te the Princess
Charlotte kept absol ute silen ce her chin held high her , ,

features facing the sunrise sky her eyes penetrating in the

,

d i rection ofthe City ofLond on — her Capital that was to be

when she was Queen ofEngland. I saw her shudder ; it was
the thought ofEnglish Blood spilled in those streets in her —
streets . I cou ld tell that by in stinct. An d there in the grow ,

ing light ofdawn I saw her beautiful features that were —

m
,

ever so bright an d merry in every co pan yexcept her father s ’

 T HE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WR ON G
—contract , the face ofa human being who has to sub it
as m
t o physical torture or Death .
She turned to Mr. Brougham an d gave hi her hand with
, m
a reg al grace .

Thank you she said ; I will return to Carlton House .

’
,

Bu t it m u st be in a R oyal Coach . Comm and one to be

o rdered for me . An d dismiss those creatures below. ’

m
Mr. Brougha lifted her hand to his lips an d kissed it ,

an d m ade way f or her to return to the d r wing room .

a - I was
stan d ing in waiting by the open window an d her eyes cau
, ght
mine as she stepped into the room .
m —
There came into the a twinkle an d a tear. She bent
her head close to mine an d whispered
Adie Ia L ib
u erté -
Good bye Shimmy
m
, ,

And I could have cried at the hu an tragedy ofit al l .

240 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
was bogged an d disgraced by it an d she had no security that
,

he would not suddenly cut of fher reven ue .

The legislation for her establishment was really set in
motion by her direct an d person al appeal to the Co mon s. m
She had sent the Speaker a copy of her correspondence with
the Q ueen in reference to the Prince s declaration with a ’
,

statement ofthe indignity premedi tated against her d u ring the

visit ofthe allied Sovereigns the which ensuing ci rc um stances

,

proved the truth of. The Speaker comm unicated her protest
to Parliament early in Jun e an d on the 2 3 rd ofthat month
,

there was a long debate with notice given ofa resolution to

,

be brought forward to vote hera fi xed allowance free from al l ,

interference or cont rol ofthe Prince Re gent . This forced

the hand s of the Mi n i sters an d on their initiation it was
, , ,

debated on the 4th ofJul y when Lord Cas tlereagh took occa
,

sion to def end the action of the Prince in as crafty a spee ch

as an
y he eve r d elivered in h is fo ul con spiracy to d est roy

the Parliament of Ireland an d force on the Union by f

, rau d
an d corru ption. But that is neither here n or there ( though
it ever maketh my blood boil to all ude to it) an d the upshot ,

was the Common s agreed to grant H er R oyal Highness an

annu m
al su offi f ty tho u sand pou nds until the King s death . ’

m
This was a far larger su than an y of her friends an d
su pporters anticipated . So large indeed that the Princess s ’
, ,

ad visers an d her own honou rable ideas were f or hav ing it

red u ced . Her Royal Highness was prone by nature to di sc uss

her private af f airs with her su ite an d I remember well her
,

rem ark s on thi s occasion . It had been su ggested to her that

thi s grant ( which was practically carried thro ugh the Com ons m
by Lord Castlereagh the creature ofthe Prince Re gent) was
,

insidious an d that there l aysome deep scheme behi n d it. It

,
’

was even sai d the Princess wou ld be prudent to refuse it as ,

its acceptation f rom the Prince Regent s su pporters might tie

’

her hands. She was debating an d summ ariz ing these con
siderations at the dinner- table an d at last delivered hersel fas
,

f ollows
 FADE S O ER THE WATE RS BLU E
’
241

‘
Dere is only one ting to be done an d I vill d o it. It
,

is not in me to suspect evil till I see it plainly ; only to b e

guarded against it. I fI refuse d is grant d e Parliament vill

m
,

sa :
y V ot de devil does de vo an v ant ? V e cannot m ake

her hu sband love her or de Q u een receive her. But ve can

settle u pon her a suf m
ficien t su to enable her to hold de rank
ofPrincess of V ales — a rank ve do tink her vorthy of an d

m
vid her rank she ust hold al l de p rivileges. D erefore I ”

v ill accept d is grant onl y a leetle lesser.

,
An d do it myself ,

vid ou t an y advice f rom my too m any f

’
riends.

And she did so only decli n ing to b urden the nation with
,

more than thirty-fi ve thousan d pounds a year ; an d that was

the income fi n al ly settled upon her an d enj oyed by her until
,

she be came Queen ofEngland .

I fear you m ust damn me for a d ull dog with al l these

m
political details I a giving you; but it is necessary to
m ention them (as b riefly as ay b m
e) in order that
you ay m
understand the situation . F or now we are come to the end
of that second peri od of my li f e when I was privileged to
resi d e with My Lad y Kind an d Bo u ntiful an d I have to take
,

farew ell ofher for another six long years.

I have said b ut little about Winsome an d Annette in what
I have recently wrote because thi s book truly is about Her
, , ,

Royal Highness an d my own in sign ifi can t af

, fai rs have no

right p art in it except as a slender thread to string my

,

bead s upon . Y oudo not want to hear ofme I know an d I

m
, ,

alway s l u f when it com es to sailing mysel fin . Who a a

f
poor hand at writing books especi ally historical ones a j ob
m
, ,

I a new to an d not quite in sympathy with my natural

, ,

disposition being to w rite ofpi rates an d privateers an d sea

, ,

fi ghts an d the East Indies. H owever we can b

, ut do our
,

best an d steer the most favourable course that our knowled ge

,

an d practice ofthi s sort ofseam anship allows.

m
All this time my estates in T e pestown were being looked
after by my attorney who was con st an tly writing to me to
,

16
 42 T HE Q UEE N C AN DO NO WRO NG
come an d settle down on them ifon l y to give the tenan ts
,

the encouragement an d con fi d en ce which the money of a

landlord spent in their mid st engenders. I had it in y m
mind to speak to the Princess about it several times but her ,

own af ai rs were in su
f ch an unsettled state that I could n ot
trouble her with mine an d the vast honour she had conferred
m
,

on me by appointing me her Extra Equerry bound e to her

service by gratef ul ties that might not be interrupted by an y
petty business ofmy own .
Although the debates over the grant to Her Royal H igh
ness were published in the daily journ als the negotiation s ,

connected with her dep artu or the C ontinent were k

re f ept a
most profound secret an d no one saving those in her closest
, ,

con fi d en ce had a su
, spicion of how soon she intended to l eave

E n glan d. The sanction of the Prince Regent had to be

obtained for her to go out ofthe country an d his hatred of
m
,

her would not permit hi to accord it gracef ully an d easily ,

al l his case an d graces being reserved to show of fhis wigs an d

waistcoats. At last however he yielded to the argument that
, ,

Public Opinion would support the Princess ifhe vexatio usly

thwarted her wishes an d the necessary leave was given . An d
,

yet kept secret ; the truth being that it was feared, if the
m
people knew what was pre editated they would never allow
,

the Princess whose bravery had endeared her to them to b

, e ,

hounded out ofher adopted land .

Ou the 28 th ofJ ul y H er R oyal Highness lef t London ,

osten sibly to spend a season at Worthing but really to make

,

it her port ofdeparture for the Continent. T he d ay prior to

thi s the Princess Charlotte by some au
, daci ous stratagem I
was never able to come to the bottom of paid a cl and estine
,

fare d visit to her mother an d I was honoured by bein g

m
,

taken into their con fi d en ce an d per itted to assi st in it .

Thi s was the last time mother an d daughter ever met on
earth whereby it is invested with a pathetic an d mou n u
f l
m
,
r
—
memory . The visit as kept a deep se cret a cri e could
w
not have been more j ealously or vigilantly guarded f ro m
2 44 THE Q UEE N CAN DO NO WRONG
It was not until I escorted the Princess Charlotte back that
I had a few words of converse with her. Arriving her heart ,

had been too f ull for words ; dep arting her angu ish m ust ,

need s fi n d reliefin them . F or as she passed out through the

little back door into the Uxbridge Road the night bein g ,

very dark she was crying silently ( as the expressi on goes)

m
, ,

an d in stead of taking my ar took my hand an d sq ueez ed ,

it in her mi sery .
Oh Shimmy she whispered I a worse than an y orphan
,
’
, ,
‘
m
now ! For my mother is leaving me an d my father brutal . ,

And l a L ib erté l a L b
i erté
,
— I shall never cu
jy
o it a gain 1
’

Y ou r Ro yal Highness I whi spered have hope ! The

’
, ,

foulest wind comes fair at last an d the Good God ,

‘
Ah she cut me short the Good God ! And yet H e
m
,

permits such a an as my father to rule over his fellow

creatures an d work his unkind will Oh Shimmy Shimmy , , ,

I never knew my mother till thi s h our ! They have ever

poi soned my ears again st her. And she is a good wo an a m—
m
go od woman ! And I a proud to be the daughter ofone so
noble an d so brave
I could not an swer. My heart hearing this justifi cation , ,

was too gratef ul too f ull to speak . But when I had gotten
,

the Princess into her hackney coach an d she had given me ,

her han d to k i ss an d thanked me for my slender service that

,

night Dear Princess I whispered in a broken voice you

, ,
’
,

know what your mother is to her charity children a Lady —

Kind an d B ountiful
‘
And Good she in sisted Good Good Good though
,
’
, , ,

they curse her every d ay an d every hour of the d ay at

Carlton House an d m ake me listen to them ! Oh Shimmy !
, ,

stand by h er dear Shimmy an d I will ever bless ou

, ,y
To my las t breath Your R oyal Highness I swore an d
, ,
’
,

bowed myselfbac k ; for she is My Lad y Kind an d Bounti ful

an d Good — for ever 1
’

And as the coach drove of f the young Prin cess s sweet i

,
’
, m
pul sive spirit prompted her to deign graciously to fling me a ki ss !
 FADES O ER
’
THE WATE RS BLUE 245

a s —
Ten d y l ter it was the 7th of August I remember
a ,

an d we were at the Old Steyne Hotel Wo rthing an d one , ,

af tern o on my Mi stress sent f or me to attend her. She was

busy writing letters offarewell an d there m ust have been a ,

ro u nd score set out to d ry on the table which was d rawn up ,

close to the window that comm anded a fi n e vie w ofthe sea.

And anchored in the of fin g was a f rigate— the J ason ,

—
C aptain King comm ander which had j ust returned from
m
conveying the E peror of Russi a an d the King of Prussia
back to Hamburg an d the Gul fofFinland .
As I entered the Princes s s room she extended her hand to
’
,

me with a particular tenderness an d condescension an d I ,

knelt an d kissed it.

Shimmy she said hél as ! de d ay hafcome ven youan d
m
’

, ,

I ust part
Part I cried in an incred ulous voice who had never
, ,

d reamt ofsuch a sorrow.

Do younot vi sh it Shimmy she as ked in a tone that was
,

sweeter to my ears than an wo rd

y s .

Oh Madam I cried passionately how can I leave you?

, ,
’
,

May I not accompany you? I did promise the Princess

Charlotte your daughter
, Oh I cannot I ust not , ,
m
leave you Madam
m
0
, .

She rose f ro her seat an d came an d stood 1n f ,

ront ofme ,

with a h and placed on each shoulder an d looked into my ,

eyes very tenderly .

Y ou vas ever de Princess ofV al es leetl e boy she said
“ ”
,

gently an d never did I do a better day s vork dan ven I did

,
’

rescu e my Kan in chen from d at S chwein ehun d Y ouhafbeen

"
ver loy al to me Shimmy ; ,you h af m ade me love yo u an d ,

my daughter love you an d al l of us love you. And dey do

,

sa
y d at if you v ant a ting done a n d done vita yo u m ust
g o
, ,
—
to Shimmy Rabbit ! Only only — her voice gre w soft an d
kind a leetle bird haf v ispered into ine ears d at Mr. m
Desmond Tempest hafde great estates in Ireland an d dey are ,

going to de wrack an d ruin because he vill act de cavalier to

2 46 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
a poo r exiled P rincess . And an od er leetle bi rd haf v is
pere d
d at de Shimmy Rabbit d at I hafloved dese twel fyears past
an d more do v ant to m
arry my pretty V in so e L ee. And m
m y p retty V i m
n so e L ee do conf e ss to me mit m any b l ooshes , ,

she do vant to m arry heem ! So sir vat haf you to say , ,

to d at P ’

m
m
That J1 y Rabbit hath but one desi re to follow Your ,

R oyal Highness s f
’
—
ortunes by Land an d Sea for Ever ifyou
wi l l on l y let him . ’

Oh fi e sir fi e ! And my pretty V in so e Lee read y to m

m
, ,

marry you? No Shimmy I a not de ingrate d at some

m
, ,

peoples do tink me. I a not de mon ster ofsel fi shn ess d at

is de vay mit R oyalties. Onl y see you I a a leetle d espotic , , m ,

an d I do hafvon order f or ou
’

y .

I bowed my obedience.
And my ord er is d is. Go you at von ce sir an d arry m
m m m
, ,

my pretty V in so e L ee so d at I ay feel ven I a far avay

m m
,

d at my leetle Shi my an d my leetle V in so e d at were are , ,

both ver happy ! Ach kind Gott she broke ofi hal f

'
"
,

bitterly vot else is dere left to me in d is cruel vorld d an

m
,

d e happiness to tink dose d at I love a happy i

”

Oh dear Madam I cried an d knelt before her could

, ,
’
, ,

I but give youal l my happiness an d take upon me al l your ,

persecution an d unhappiness I would welcome the exchang e . ,

’

She stretched her hand out an d stroked my cheek . It was

al l the reply she m ade —that an d the su spic ion ofa moi st u
, re
in her kind blue eyes.

An d I left the service ofMy Lady Kind an d Boun tiful

so

an d Good wi th her p romi se to send f

, or me if ever I co u ld
serve her. She had m ade u her su ite n d they were al l old

m
p a ,

servitors an d had a prior cl ai

, to mine who had only acted ,

as her Extra Eq u erry for less than three months. And what
H er Highn ess said was true th at Winsome was ready to
m
,

m arry me an d I eager to marry her an d y tenants d id n eed

m
, ,

y p resen ce in tho se hard h ungr y time s. ,

 248 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
n ative country an d to pass the winter in a warm clim ate on
,

the shores ofthe Mediterranean . And although there was

only a few hours notice af forded ofher departure a mighty
"
,

concourse ofpeople collected to witness it.

The arran gements for her embarkation were but those ofa
private individ ual . The J ason was anchored three miles out
from the shore with the R os ario to act as a c onvoy . Thro u
, gh
some mi su nderstanding when the Princess an d her atten d ants
,

an d suite left the Steyn e Hotel where she had bee n l odging , ,

for the u 1 ose ofro wing to the figate at h al f -past fo u

r
m
r n or
p p ,

boat n or barge n or Captain King fro the J ason were ready

, ,

to receive her an d take her of f.

In this d ilemm a I was despatched to fi n d out what un

toward delay had ari sen the Princess having a fear that the
,

Prince R egent had changed his mind at the last moment an d

prohibited her departure .
But the Prince R egent s head was too heavy that d ay to
’

d o anything b ut nurse it . On the previous evening he had

given a prodigious entertainment at C arlton H ouse to cele
brate the exiling ofhis wi fe . T he most costly an d p recious
State Service ofmassive an d richly -chased gold plate was
o dered to honour the festivity an d the vi ands served well
r —, ,

I hope they were paid for which was not always the case as
, ,

his ruinated tradesmen knew who oflz-times af ter pled gin g

, ,

their very beds to rai se the credit to execute H is R oyal

Highn ess s orders found their bills imp ossible to get d is
’
,

charged . F or this unparal leled Prince as he was sometimes ’

,

called had a delicate taste in feeding an d his whim sical re

m
, ,

q uire en ts we re on a par with the nighting ales tong ues a n d

’

the peacocks brain s ofthe old R oman Emperors.

’

And at this entertainment which ended in the usual riot

,

an d d runkenness that was native to Carlton House The First ,

Gentlem an in England called the toas t ofthe evening .

And it was
T o the P rin cess of W ales— D ti A nd h m m
m E gl
a n a on ay s e

n ever retw to n and

 FADES O ER
’
THE WATE R S BLUE 2 49

And their R oyal Highnesses of York an d Cl arence an d

m
,

the ti e servers an d toadies an d tuft-hunters an d tinkers

-
, , ,

( as they call t hem in the E ast Indie s) who g rovelled ro und

that august Head ofa Great Nati on hailed the toast an d
m
, ,

not one ofthe had the manhood to turn his gl ass down .
One last word before I dismi ss this undesi rable subject from
these pages. There is a m atter that is historical now for
m
,

it hath been q uoted by several writers other than that i

agin ative wom an Lady Anne H amilton an d is generally
,

believed to be true . A few days before the embarkation of

the Princess Captain King of the J ason received a letter
, , ,

from H is R oyal Highness the D u ke of Clarence. It needs

no explanati on .
Here is a copy ofthe letter

D EAR KI N G,
You are g oin g to b e ordered to tak f
e the P rin cess o

m
m
Wales to the Con tin eut. Ifyou d on t co it ad ul tery with
’

m
her, you are a da n ed f ool . You have my con sen t for it,
an d I ca m
assu re you that you have that f y b
o m
rother the

Reg en t.

An d the R egent an d Clarence were to sit in turns on

the same Throne that had cushi oned the nobility of Al fred ,

the glory ofthe Third Ed ward the l ustre ofEli z abeth an d

m
, ,

r r —
the p op iety of Anne the sa e Throne that had been
p urifi ed by the Shad ow of the G reat C rom well ( n otwith

standing that he was the C urse ofIrel and ) an d is now being

,

elevated enlightened an d establ ished by the vi rtue of our

, ,

good an d gracious Sovereign Lad y Queen V ictoria.

,

I fo un d Captain King for he was on shore only delayed

m
, ,

by the d if or j ust
fi cul ty of getting into a fi n e new uni f ,

received f rom London by express an d that fi tted him ill . I

,
250 T HE QUEE N CAN D O N O WRONG

told him ofthe inconvenience an d slight Her Royal Highness

had sustained an d how she had drove to Sou
, th Lancing ,

where she co uld put of f with more convenience an d intended ,

to engage a shore boat to carry her to the J as on .

At the which Captain King was thunderstruck an d i , m
l ored me to m ak e h i h umble ap logie a d sa he wo u l d
p s o s n
y ,

attend her with the most u rgent d espatch having been

m
,

informed she would n ot e bark till six o clock . Then ‘

,

with many prodigious oaths that did create a special Hell ,

of extrao rdinary temperat u re for Naval Tailors broke his

m
,

way into his co at an d hurried to the beach where he co

m m
, ,

an d ed a sho re boat to f erry him out to eet the J ason s ’

barge now seen to be approaching. Having boarded which

m
, ,

he changed her course for Lancing hi selfstandi n g up in ,

the sheets an d steering.

Meanwhile I had rej oined the Princess who was now
, ,

seated in her carri age w atchin g an d w aiting f or the ap

r o achin g barge . She was drest in a dark cloth pe l i sse with

p ,

large gold clasps an d a cap in the Prussian hussar style of

, ,

violet an d green satin with a green feather. Her features

,

were sad an d melancholy . Circling her carri age at a respectful ,

distance was collected an immense concourse of spectators

, ,

on foot on horseback an d in carriages an d chaises who by

, , ,

thei r gestures that were touchingly subd ued an d by the

, ,

flutterin g oftheir kerchief ound

s strove to exp ress thei r p rof
,

sympathy with thi s ill - used R oyal Lady . She repeated ly

kissed her hand to the assembled m ultitude as she wal ked
down the beach to the barge an d when she stepped from the ,

l and on to the sea the tears were co ursing d own her cheeks .
Winsome an d I were there . In her agitation she had j ust
sho ok ou r hand s as th ose ofthe privileged f ew pe rmitted to

m
,

su rrou nd her at that las t pathetic oment . Ann ette an d the

rest of her su ite followed her an d Captain King standing , ,

erect an d uncovered issued the orders to Give Way

,

And so the Princess ofWales left England s shores. As ’

the barge s head was turned seaward the J as on an d the con

’
,
 2 56 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
f
ather s
’
death bed where only the Duke of York (who drew
-
,

ten thousand pounds a year as guardi an ofhis imbecile sire

an d Soverei gn ) was p resent of the six son s still surviving to
H is l ate Majesty .

I, Jimmy R abbit but now known by my proper name an d

m
,

ti tle of Desmond Tempest Master of T e pestown was in

, ,

London when the old King died being necessitated to lod ge

,

there for two -thirds ofthe year by reason ofmy d uties to my

constituents whom I represented in Parliament. F or I had
,

sat f or my n ative co u nty for the l ast three years. And with
me was my dear wi fe Winsome an d our family oftwo son s
an d one dau ghter. Whereof the eldest son an d heir was
called Carol us after H er R oyal Highness who stood God
, ,

mother an d furthermore by her speci al req uest Kan in chen

m
, , , , ,

the which was the Princess s pl ayn a e for me in the days

‘

ofmy yo u th an d meant Little Rabbit or as you might

, ,
’
,

E n glish it Rabb
, itikin s.
’

And now with the King s death great things an d grie vo us

’

were about to happen to My L ad y Kind an d Bounti ful an d

Good . B ut b efore I tel l youofthem I must give youa brief
accou nt ofwhat had occ urred in these fi ve an d a hal fyears
past.
A month af ter my dear Mistress left England Winsome ,

an d I were m arried an d I to ok her to my I ri sh Estate s an d

, ,

there we did settle d own to m ake the acquaintance of my

tenants an d gain their good will . The which with our ,

entire sympathies engaged on their behal f was not d if fi cul t ,

to d o ; an d by the time Carol us was born their af fection for

,

us f ound expression in the bigge st bon fi re seen in all the

country round since they b urnt down my wicked uncle s se ven ’

ricks in the year af ter the Union whereby fi ve ofthe ras cal s
,

got hung an d eighteen transported to New Holland.

Annette remained with the Prince ss an d accompanied her ,

on her travel s an d a Pilgrimage to the Holy Land so that I ,

was kept f ully informed ofal l that happened in H er R oyal

 CAR OLINA R E G INA 257

Highness s household until the end ofthe year 18 17 when

’
,

Annette came home on account ofher health an d stayed ,

with me returning to her post in the autumn of 18 18 an d

, ,

rem aining in it u ntil she accompanied the Queen back to

Engl and after her succession .
I will give you a briefaccount ofH er R oyal Highness s ’

extended travel s after leaving Engl and for as you will , ,

presently see they have something to do with my story. The

,

winter of18 14-15 Her R oyal Highn ess spent in Naples. It

m
was here she con fi r ed in her service those Itali an personages
whose attendance on her during the next fi ve years was the
cause of so m uch condemnation an d persecution . Chief
amongst them an ex - soldier named Bergami or

m
ar
B tolomeo ‘

Perga i who was recommended to the Princess by the

,

Marq ui s Ghisil iari Chamberlain to the Emperor as perfectly

, ,

honourable honest an d trustworthy . Her R oyal Highness s

, ,
’

behavio ur to him an d her Italian en tourag e in general is I

, , ,

think best explained in her own words ; an d as I was privi

,

l eged to read several private letters she wrote on the subject ,

I tran scribe portions here as her complete apol og ia for the

co urse she thought fi t to adopt .
Here is the first extract d ated in the winter of 18 17 the
, ,

person to whom it was addressed bein g a particular dear

f riend ofthe P rincess

As to my household I hear people are meddling wid it

, ,

an d saying it is improper. In de fi rst pl ace what wo u l d dey

m
,

have e to do ? All de fi n e English folk leave me . I do

not send dem away though by-the-bye some of dem not
, , ,

—
beh ave as civil as I co uld like. No m atter I wud have
patien ce wid dem but dey chose to go so I not prevent dem .
m m m
, ,

But I ust have someone to attend e an d I ake my choice ,

of some very agreeable person s in eve ry way fi t to be my

,

attend ants though the j ealous English beggars like Mi ss

, ,

an d one or two more of my acq u aintance s dear wu d

m
, ,

have liked to have had the situation which to co tesse Oldi

now fil l s to her an d my great sati sfaction . H er brother al so
17
258 TH E QU EEN CAN DO NO WRONG
very intelligent an d ge ntle an like person . Dey are of m
m
is a
a decayed noblem an s f amily m u
’
ch better born than Willi a
,

B urrel . But I know people are very ill natured an d chuse

-
,

to abuse me for the choice I have made in my household .

No matter I do not care . From hen ceforth I will do j ust as
,

I please ; that I will ! Since de Engli sh neither give me d e

great honour ofbeing a P fl n cess d e Gal le I will be Carol ine
nswic k—a happy merry soul but si pk en t P mm
,

ofB ru , ,

Again the Princess wrote about the same time :

m m
,

Why do you n ot co e to Co o ? I von d make you

wel come at my anchorite s di n ner every d ay ifyou v o n d eat
’

my humble fare . Neither de co tesse n or myselfare epicures m ,

an d very o f ten we cook our own dinner ! V hat von d de

Engli sh people say if dey heard d at ? Oh fi e Prin cess of , ,

Wales !
The old Begum Q ueen Charlotte is on her last legs I
m m
, , ,

hear. Macs cun e fait fi aid

'
- chaud now. There was a
’

m
,

time when such intelligence might have gladdened e but

m
,

now noting in de world do I care for save to pass de ti e

m
,

as q u ickly as I can ; an d death ay hurry on as fast as he

— m
pleases I a ready to die
And to make a last quotation from m any passages written
in the sa e f m rank an d f ree but too often mel ancholy , ,

spi rit

, m
Thank you a chére for your kind letter which I a
, , m
af raid to an swer f or I have so little to tell ou Living he
m
, y . re

as I do wid my f aithful little society who are al l co posed

m
,

ofpersons d at do not meddle wid de

g ran d e oud e which ,

suits me better than ifthey d id but which ofcourse pre vents , , ,

me having m uch wherewith to entertain oders. I should b e

happy to see you in my little n utshell which is pretty an d

m m
,

co fortable an d my gardens are char an t. I lead q uite a

m
,

rural li f
,e an d workin de garden myself which do y body ,

an d mind both good .

’

I have no words to ad d to thi s simpl e an d artless picture

ofthe Princess s li fe in Italy . For here youhave it sk etched
’
260 T HE QUEEN CAN DO N O WR ON G
pol acre in safety to its destination ; an d the Princess took
up her pe rm anent residence fi rst at Lake Como an d l ater at
, ,

a villa she pu rchased at Pesaro near R ome. ,

Annette accompanied her in al l these extended travel s an d ,

the activity an d con stant change was ofgreat b en efi t to my

si ster in keeping her thou ghts away from Colonel S urges ,

whom she never saw or heard from after she had return ed
his letter: Thi s was a thing to be thank f ul f or becau

m
se , ,

deep down in her heart she ever loved that an an d had it

, ,

not been for the distractions oftravel an d change of scene

she m ight have fallen into a state ofsettl ed melancholia.
m
After her return fro the Holy Land in October 18 17 , ,

Annette received permission from the Princess to pay me a

v i sit
,
m
y d aughte r being j ust then born to whom she was to ,

stand Godmother. Moreover there was another m atter I

,

wished to settle with her namely the divi sion ofour patri
, ,

mony . F or by this time I had so improved the circum stan ces

ofmy tenants as well as sec u red new ones for several f arm s
m
,

that were unlet when I ca e i n to possession that although I

m
, ,

m ade an abatement oftwen ty -five per cen tu in my rents my ,

rent -roll was increased to six tho u sand po unds a year. I urged
Annette to let me settle hal fofthi s on her but she resol utely ,

re f used only consenting as a great f

, ,avou r to accept three ,

hundred pounds a year as pin money. And there the m atter

-

had to stan d an d has never bee n bet ter ad j usted to this d ay.
,

And n ow one word about that dear sweet gi rl Princess ,

Charlotte of Wal es for whom I conceived a h umble an d

,

respectf ul affection such as I cannot explai n in word s. She

was m arried in May 18 16 to Prince Leopold of S axe
, ,

Coburg. Ever since her escapade the young Princess had

m
been im ured at Cranbourne Lodge in Windsor F orest
—
under the rigorous tutel age it might almost be call ed
—
tyranny of the old Queen an d a pini n g for liberty n o
, ,

doubt in fluen ced her in accepting the Prince .

,

The marriage was not an unhappy on e except in its earl y

an d tragic termin ation . Outhe 5th ofNove ber 18 17, the
,

m ,
 C AROLINA B E GINA 26 1

Princess was delivered of a stillborn m al e child . She was

reported to b e p rogressing favo urably when suddenly a ,

chan ge occurred an d this bright an d beauti ful yo ung

,

—
creature the Hope of England an d the Idol ofthe Nation
—succumbed from collapse an d pl unged the country into a
,

deeper mourning than an y I have ever seen .

I f such a thing were possible the death of the Princess
,

Charlotte increased the unpopularity of the Queen an d the

Prince R egent. At thi s period ofhis rule the l atter was so
m uch detested that he could never go abroad witho ut the
~

mob hissing him ; an d as often as the af fai rs of State pe r

-

m itted he wo uld flyto Brighton f

,
or refuge there to sq uander ,

money on the extraordinary building called the Pavilion ,

th t as ever a horse leech s daughter to him or seek peace

a w - ’
,

on board the yacht Royal Georg e which he had j ust pur

chased an d on which he wo uld dare the peril s ofthe deep if
,

it were very fi n e.
As f or the old Q ueen daily getting more domineering an d
,

cantankerous in her old age there was a story told ofher

,

more to her credit than an y other I ever heard which ,

belonged to thi s period ofher life. She was going to her

Drawing-room in her chair when she was recognised an d
,

stopped by the people who in solently asked what she had

,

done with the Princess Charlotte then at Cranbo urne Lodge .

,

Ouwhich she let down the glasses ofher chair an d leaning , ,

ou t cried to the mob

m
,

I a seventy -two years ofage. I have been Q ueen of

f -
England ty two years an d was n ever hissed before
fi ,

Upon which they let her pas s without further molestation ,

as indeed they had better who was an old termagant with

, , ,

the largest ugliest most spiteful -speaking mo uth I ever beheld

, ,

or heard in an y wom an .

And with thi s briefindication ofhow the world wagged

during those f ive years ofmy Princess s absence f ro England ’
m ,

I will get back to my story once more an d endeavour to carry

it to a fi n ish.
262 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
It was S unday the 3 oth of Jan uary 18 20 an d al l the
, , ,

shu tters up in al l the London windows in token ofmourn ing ,

for the good old Kin g at l ast relieved f rom his su fferin gs.
m
,

I was busy p reparing for a journey for at Winso e s sug , ,

’

g es tion I h a d, dete rmi n ed to s tart at noon for Legho rn wh e re ,

I believed Her Maj esty to b e in order to convey to her the

,

information ofthis great event. F or when her daughter the ,

sweet Pr incess Charlotte died no of fi cial intimation was sent

m
,

to her an d it was through a com on newspaper she fi rst

,

learnt ofher an d the Nation s i rreparable loss. ’

m
, ,

At six o clock that morning I had despatched my an to

’

Dover to arrange for post-horses to be ready on the road an d ,

a f ast fi shin c ft f r mysel f to cross over to France nd I

m
g ra o a
was to f ollow six hours later. By ten al l y preparati ons
were complete for I intended to travel light so that if put
, , ,

to it I could push ahead on horseback when a wheel ed vehicle

,
'

f ailed me as it m u st do in c rossing the Alps into Ital y at

m
,

that season ofthe year. And being read y I was in so e , ,

what ofa h urry to start an d had a mind to order round the

,

-
po t chaise at once when there came a knock at the front
s ,

door an d to my am az ement the butler announced Colonel

, , ,

H astings S urges desired to see me

Gad ! you might have picked y pocket I wa s so took m ,

aback with astoni shment. F or he an d I had not met since

18 14 when he jilted my sister Annette becau
, se she wo u ld
not throw over the Princess at his intolerable bidd ing in , ,

connection with that contemptible non sense of the singer

Saccharin i who was nothing m ore than a silver voiced b
,
- uf
foon hired to am use Her Royal Highness.
I gave orders for Surges to be shown i n to my political
room which was reckoned my very private sanctum where i n
,
’
,

I tran sacted my Parliamentary b usiness an d Winsome not ,

allowed to enter u nder an y pretence. And meanwhile took , ,

occasion to recover my composure for a few min utes b efore

attending what I knew m u st be a pai n f ul an d , perhaps
m
m m
,

in fla ab l e inter ew.
2 64 THE QUEE N CAN DO NO WRONG
In India. ’

And why P ’

Well you kno w why I lef

, t . And f or the rest ,I con ,

ceived my old Au nt Mi ss Hastings to b e in straitened

m
, ,

circu stances an d desired to render her more comforta ble .

,

This I could only do by going to the East where the pay is ,

ood . F or when I l ast returned I had but the hal fpay of

-
g
my rank an d that will not carry youfar for yo ursel f an d an
,

old lady who has been used to her comforts. ’

And so youwent to Indi a in order to assist your Aunt P ’

P ut it in that way ifyou li ke. Only it makes me out a

m
be tter an than I really was. I went to India in a fi t of
pique an d arrived there was given an appoint ent t hat
, , ,
m
enabled me to remit home a thousand pound s a year to my
—
Aunt not a penny ofwhich was spent or even needed by ,

her.
’

Y ouspeak in enigm as.

’

‘
As was her conduct . I have told you how, when she d is
m
carded e, she set my cousin George Slee in my pl ace ; an d
ho w he m arried L ad y Sarah Torrington , whom I was en gaged
to once, an d she wheedl ed (as I thought) the whole of my
Aunt s fortune out ofher, an d squandered it in gambling .
’

Bu t I was mi stook . My Au nt s fortun e was two hundred

’

thousand pounds, an d she only made half ofit over to y m

cousi n George, an d when that was g one, an d George in the
Fleet (where he died last year) , an d Lady Sarah displaying
her true colours, a great remorse struck my A unt, an d she
determined to con stitute me her sole heir again , an d live
parsimoniously until she had saved up an d put away the
h undred thousand pounds that was squandered . And this
she was doing an d never told me of it that time I went to
,

see her in Co rnwall an d f ound her living in a little cottage

m
,

at Pen z ance with only one

, aid to attend her. Never a wo rd

b reathed then or thereafter I give youmy honour though I

m
, , ,

w rote to her by every homeward -bound ship an d re itted ,

her fi ve hu ndre d pounds each half-year through my age n t s.

 CAB OLIN A R E GINA 265

Well would you believe it ? she died l ast year an d left me

,

her f ortune One H undred an d Eighty Thousand Pounds !

And the wording ofher Will by God Jimmy I tell youit
—
m
,

ad e me weep ! Sterne never wrote anything mo re simple an d

pathetic. And she prayed me to take the name ofHastings

m
,

without making an y condition ofit an d so I a n ow become

m
,

Hastings Surges Hastings an d a wealthy an but not a

, ,

happy on e. ’

Why how is that i I asked .

,
”

I cannot b e happy u ntil Annette hath forgiven me said ,

’

he an d I dare not askher.

’
,

I looked at him who in his years ofunhappiness an d regret

, , ,

had behaved so well an d dutif ully to his old Aunt.

m
I think you ay venture it I told him . ,
’

Y ou do he cried an d setting Carol us upon the floor

m
,

grasped both my hands. J immy ay I reckon upon your

‘
,

su pport P’

I had given it you easier had youbeen a poor an but I m

m
,

ust n ot withhold it because youare a rich one . But that is

a m atter which will req u i re m uch consideration an d I can not
m
,

give it at thi s present moment for I a leaving home in an ,

hour. ’

And where are yougoing

To Leghorn post has te to acquaint Her Majesty the
, ,

Q ueen ofthe death ofthe old King . ’

Ah he said . And then : May I not accompany you ,

Jimmy ? I should m uch like to . ’

I reflected a moment.
No ; it would n ot be appropri ate . Y ou could not keep
your personality out ofsuch a meeting (for Annette is with
H er Maj esty ) an d the Queen will have no time to spare a
,

thought for you. Besides I do not kn ow whether she would

,

rece ive you . No u c nnot ccomp ny me ’

m yo ,a a a .

I a yours to command he said very humbly . And ,

’
,

si n ce
you h ave given me yo ur co unten ance J immy an d , ,

promi sed me your support I cannot urge youfurther.

,
’
266 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO W RONG
T is
’
business that cannot be forced on or exped i ted for
m
a ,

it d epends upon Annette an d Her Maj esty . I ay tell you

the Queen forbade your na e to b e mentioned in her p resen ce m
af ter youde parted . B u t she is a woman very f orgiving an d
very generous an d for the love she bears Annette ay be
,
m
persuad ed to forgive you. ’

Pray Heaven she ay said Surges solemnly. m ’

,

And now said I youm ust go. F or I have to bid f

,
’
,
arewell
to my wi fe an d do not desire a witness to my leave-takin g . ’

m
,

So he went an d I to Winsome f ro
, whom I had never ,

been parted since we were married . And in about hal fan

hour got me of f less d ry about my bowsprit than I li k e to
m
,

sail an d with several tears bed ewing w h i skers that were

, y ,

not rightly of my own shedding. And so do wn Hol b orn

Hill through Cheapside over London Bridge into the Borough
—with a memory as I passed through it of that d ay
, ,

m
, ,

eighteen years ago when Pasco led me captive fro the

P ieb aki H orse to Bl ackheath . And so at a good round ,

gal l op to Dover an d arrived there b efore eight ofthe cl ock

m
, , ,

with my an to meet me an d a weatherly l ugger read y to ,

carry me over to Fran ce.

There are folk who prate ofthe perils ofthe deep but
m
,

give me those a thousand ti es in preference to the peri l s of

the land when you have to travel it rapidly on wheels or on
horseback . I tell you by the time I had drove through ,

France crossed the Mont Ceni s on a damned m ule an d

, ,

reached Legho rn I was b ut a sheer hulk with its sheathing

, ,

off . And yet m ain an d mortal g l ad to fi n d ( af terwards) I had

arriv ed before the express co urier despatched by Mr.Brougham
to acq uaint H er Majesty ofher succession .
It was on the ni n th d ay that with nin e days heard on y ,
’
m
chin I arrived at Leghorn an d in stan tly requested
, ,

au dience with the Q ueen . The hour was not noon yet an d ,

she in her bed - chamber an d a great whiskered Italian as ked

m
,

me what my business was with a haughtiness in his ann er I ,

was not dispo sed to broo k .

268 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
m m
And when I ca e to ysel fagain Her M ajesty was b ath
ing my forehead with scent an d Annette holding b ran dy to
,

my lip s
So Shimmy you are Kan iu
, , chen again said the Q u een ,
‘
an d I haf for de second time in my li f e to b ring you
better 1 ’

At which moment Annette tilted the gl ass so that a good

swig of brandy ran do wn my throat. I t did me a great
service giving me spirit an d strength to ri se to
, y fee t an d m ,

cr
y
Your Maj esty the Ki n g is dead
, And then Lo n g live ,

the Q ueen May the Queen live f or ever

And with that down upon my knees before her an d ,

Annette by my side . And it was to us her Charity

—
children that the Q ueen knowing herself a Q ueen fi rst
, ,

gave her hand to he ki ssed !

At last she m u .rm u red an d stood there tragically
, ,

silent an d sad . And n ow ‘

She broke do wn an d t urning wal ked towards the window .

, , ,

I can conj ure up the scene—the picture ofher now . She was
drest in a crim son mornin g wrapper her di shevelled hai r , ,

now streaked with gray streaming down her shoulders an d

, ,

shod in a pair of down at heel slippers that cl acked in con

- -
,

g ru ousl
y in time with h er heavy t read . H er M aj esty had

gro wn less stout than when I last saw her an d aged ,

m uch in her looks. H e face was high coloured an d the

-

m
r ,

frol ickso e expression s that chased one another ac ross her

features in the old days had given way to one of settl ed

melancholy an d l anguid resignation . There were those who
pro fessed to see in her face at this period ofher life an ill
look which they attributed to her mode ofliving. B ut for ,

myself I say they were liars an d traducers an d that the

, ,

m ark s which gave H er Majestys features an appearan ce less ’

pleasing than formerly were those chiselled there by care

an d sorrow by f ru
,itless regrets for her dead daughter by ,

harrowing despair for a l i fe rendered void an d miserable ,

 CAR OLIN A B E G IN A 269

by the brutal ity ofher enemies an d the outrageous slings an d

arrows ofadversity .

An d as she stood by the window looking steadf astl y u

,p at
the blue sky as ifto fathom the intentions ofGod toward s
m
her in thi s co ing crisis ofher li f e I vow her glance was as ,

daring as that ofthe bravest Brun swicker who ever snapped

his fi n gers in the f ace ofDeath on the fi el d ofb attle.

So stood she f or some min utes whil st Annette an d I held

,

back in respectful silence ; stood there her bl ue eyes fi xed on ,

the blue heavens with an exalted yet no exultan t expression

in them stood there an d looked a Q u
, een
And then we saw her clasp her hands an d bow her head , ,

an d we k n ew she was silently praying f or Di vine strength

to support her in the future as it had supported her in the

,

bitter pas t . At l ast she turned an d came toward s us.

Shimmy she said I do tank youver moch for vot you
’
, ,
’

hafdone . Y ou vas ever de Princess ofV ales leetle boy

’

an d smiled her old kind smile . And now tell me v en did y m

dear fader in l aw die P
- - ’

Outhe 29th ofJanuary Yo ur M ajesty at hal f

,
-pas t eight
,

o clock in the evening

’ ’
.

And d is is only de 8 th ofFebruary ! V y Shimmy you

m
, ,

m ust hafflown like de bird s to bring me de news so te !

’

And you vas fainted ven I come into de room Annette ,

take your dear broder an d get him rested an d gifhim to eat

, ,

an d to drink . And v en he has sl e it an d got his repo se

pp , ,

he sall tell me everyting. ’

m
I a quite recovered Your Majesty I decl ared. And
, ,
’

f or my ne ws I did not stay to gathe r an

, y othe r than that the

King is dead . And the Nation awaits Your M aj esty eagerly. ’

Ah de Nation she echoed but not d e Ministers—not

, ,
‘

— —
de ari stocracy not de R egent s de King s party ! My ’ ’

husband is al l -powerful now an d I a al l -poor. H e is de

, m
f ountain ofHonour an d I de Q ueen in disgrace ! De King
m
,

can do no w rong— he vill stretch d at decree to its u t ost

limit to overwhelm me ! V ot can I do to protect myself
270 TH E QUEE N CAN DO NO WRONG
g inst de King who could not protect myself again st d e
m m
a a ,

Prince ofV ales ? I haf ine V aterloo to fight yet an d ein , ,

Gott I vant a B l ucher f

or to help me

Mr. Bro ugham shall be Your Maj est s Bl u

y che r I ven
’
,
’

tured .

Bro ugham she picked me up with a fi n e irony. Yes

,
’
, ,

true ; he vas like Bl ucher ven he vas not present ! I d id go

to Lyons two months ago to make meeti n g vid Bro ugha m ,

bt
u — d a -
mn tion to me he sall explain vy dere vas 3
a

Bu t I vaited vaited vaited an d no Mr. Brougham !

, , ,

And here you see me shust returned an d my life nearl y

m
, ,

losset in a storm d at d id overtake y ship an d onl y Gott ,

save her f rom sinking ! Mr. B rougham m ust show him self
de Bl ucher be fore I do al l o w d at he is one . ’

Your Maj esty I answered reme be ring Mr. Brougham s

,
’
, m ’

speech to the Princess Ch arlotte th at night at Conn au ght

House when be persuaded her to return to her father s pro ’

m
,

tection I a so presumptuous as to prophesy th at Mr.

,
‘

Brougham will yet prove him selfYour Majestys Blucher ’

27 2 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
Wherefore H er Maj
determined to await further
esty

despatches from Mr. B rougham having no m anner of doubt

,

he would shortly advise her to proceed to E n gland And in

this state ofun certainty as to her actions the Queen did me
the honourto as kme to remain with her an d assist Lieutenant ,

Ho wnam in his d uties ofprivate secretary for so long as she

continued on the Continent. Which post I accepted with
becoming duty an d a great pride to serve her fi l l in g the ,

position from February to Jun e when Her Majesty landed in

,

England an d graciously relieved me ofmy duties.

,

Well now I suppose youwill want to know something of

, ,

her hou sehold at thi s time an d especi ally ofthe great Co u

, nt
Bergami promoted Chamberlain to Her Maj esty . I have no
,

hesitation in ab ating you r cu or I m ad e his ac q u

riosity f , ain

tan ce an d formed my opinion ofhim without fear or f avou

'

, r.
In the fi rst place I will admit he was an adventure r an d
, ,

his Coun tship sadly l acking di st inction an d heraldic anti

q u ity. And in the second that he had th ose two sav ing
,

graces of your true adventurer prudence an d imp ud ence.

F or the rest I wo uld describe him as a stout brave shrewd
, , , ,

honest Italian soldier so f ar as an Itali an can b e hon est.

m
,

That is to say he was a an to earn his pay an d something

, ,

over whenever he could . H e had served in the campaigns of

18 12 18 13 an d 18 14 u
, , nder General Count Pino an d was no ,

carpet cavalier or common courier as the Q ueen s enemies ’

m
,

liked to describe him . But a an competent to protect his

Mistress by force of arm s in an y emergency of peril ; an d
af ter a dangerous experien ce she had suf fered ( when there is ,

little doubt assassination was attempted ) it was absolutely

,

necessary for her to have a guard always at hand .

That Bergami chanced to be handsome an d military -lookin g
was su rely no f au lt or crime. H e stood nearly six feet in his
shoes ; his counten ance was b old yet agreeable in its ex
,

pression ; his form robust an d built on strong lines ; he was

m
,

in short a fi n e fi gure of a an . But his whi skers an d

,

moustachios worn after the manner ofhis countrymen d id

, ,
 THE Q UEEN RETURNS TO EN GLAN D 273

prej udice him in English eyes which deem a an a Greek if

, m
he carries an y hai r on his upper lip whilst a beard on his
,

j owl makes him a brigand at the very least . Bergami pro

f essed to be descended from an ancient noble but decayed , ,

fami l y this might have been true for his father was a very
,

respectable physici an . H e spoke several languages with

r ofi cien c an d was accu stomed to carry him sel fwith an air
p y ,

of comm and su ch as the military habit engenders. H is

original introduction to H er Majesty was i rreproachable ,

for it came f rom the Chamberl ain of the Emperor of

Austria. H is services were engaged by Sir William Gell
m
,

who was perhaps the

, , ost conspicuous single -minded , ,

an d devoted of al l the gentlemen who had the honou r to

serve the Q u een an d the oldest an d most trusted in her

,

service .

Ou the other hand fyo m t know e ga i s ill qu

i u u B - m
alities
’

m
, s r ,

he was suspicious ( as I experienced ysel f who on ce had to ,

give him a touch of my Tempest temper) avaricious as are , ,

al l Itali an s an d mighty hau

, ghty . An d yet when you come ,

to con sider ofthe con fi d en ce reposed in him by Her Majesty ,

of how her personal saf ety d uring her travels in o utlandi sh

region s was con fi d ed to him an d the q u ick p ro otion he m
m
,

won you ay forgive him his blown out m anner as you

-

m
, ,

a fo rgive stiltedness in an y Engli sh military of fi cer or

y ,

pomposity in an Alderm an full -blown ofLondon City . As

for the shock ing an d outrageous lying stories ci rcul ated about
H er Majesty an d thi s con d en t al senti n el as I
fi i — ay call m
m
Bergami — I a convinced they were without foundation . The
m
Q ueen s general anner to al l her dependen ts an d domestics
’

was peculi arly af f able an d Bergami she spoke to an d treated

,

exactly as she did Mon sieur Sicard her old an d faithful

,

Bu t becau se of thi s afi ab il ity she was ever su

'

steward . , , s

ected by people who wi sh ed to ru in h er ofmi scondu ct with

p
m
, ,

whomsoever she sho wed favour to— y old p atron Captain ,

Monday for one ; Sir Sydney Smith for another ; an d to

, ,

mention them in the shameless wholesale spirit of her

,

18
274 TH E Q UEEN C AN DO NO WR ONG
trad ucers, Mr. L awrence the painter Lord H en ry Fitz geral d
m
, ,

Sir Willi am Gell the singer Saccharin i — G od . there was

, y
no end to thei r flib bity gibb
- ity accu satio n s— an d e v e ry one

of them pu re im agination s ! Arising f rom deliberate m alice

an d a hope to gain something by pleasing the R egent an d ,

not f rom a candid view ofher cond u ct .

And for this particular accusation in connection with Ber
gami I have the evidence ofmy own sister that the Q ueen s ’

m
,

behaviour towards hi was precisely what it had been towards

a doz en men — as condescending as indiscreet an d as sinless.
, ,

How could it be otherwise ? Was the Princess of Wales

going to prostitute her person to a common Caval ier before
the eyes ofher suite that in cl uded many most respectable
,

persons an d never numbered less than twenty ? Was she at

, ,

fif ty years ofage to barter her Q u

, eenly succession for a low
intrigue ? Was my own sister to counten ance such crimi
n al it ?
y We re Ho wna an dm F l inn to let an y m
an live who

took liberties with the daughter in l aw of their So vereign ?

- -
Was the society in which she mingled at Mil an Ro e an d , m,

other places to champion her ( as it did ) when she had lef t ,

an d there was nothing more to be gotten f rom her smile ,

but the favour ofthe King ofEngland by denouncing her ?

I tell you the thin g was impossible absurd fantastic to
, ,

su ggest ; I tell youit was a foul an d lying plot an d a cl um sy

,

one to boot to attempt to trad uce her honour in that con

,

n ection I tell youC aroline ofBrunswick was a Princess too

proud ofher family to ri sk her reputation an d compro mise
her f uture by truck with a f avo u rite — for there can b e no

denial of the fact that Bergami was favoured an d yet in ,

no more criminal degree than the f avou rites ofm any R oyal

ladies. Had there been an y justifi cation for the accusations ,

could H er Majesty have returned to Engl and to face her

enemies who were paramount in the land ? Would her
,

bearing have bee n what it was ? Would she have survived

the sh ame ofthat dam n able trial ? Would her death -bed
have been the death -bed ofa saint were she anythin g but
27 6 TH E Q UEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
her thei r rescue from poverty their ed ucation an d the
, ,

ortable an d respectable positions in life to which th ey

com f

An d so to my story, which I fi n d myselftoo ofi en cruisin g

away from ! As I have said, I spent f our months in the
Queen s villa at Pesaro near R ome with constant despatches
’
, ,

passing between her an d Mr. Bro ugham Her Majestys ,

’

anxiety being to retu rn to England an d his apparen tly to , , ,

restrain her f
m
rom doing so.
During this period it fell to me to write any letters for
H er Maj esty . In the middle ofMarch she hictated a long
one ofwhich a copy was published in all the Engl ish j ournal s
, ,

detailing the many rebuf s an d in su

f lts she had experienced at ,

the in stigation ofthe King s Government from the C ourts of

’

Austria France, Sard inia an d the Papal States with a spi rited
m
, , ,

protest against the excl usion ofher na e from the liturgy

ofthe Ch u rch ofEngl and wherein altho u
, gh she had been
,

publicly prayed for as Princess of Wales for twenty -four

years the King now prohibi ted her being prayed for as
,

Q ueen of England . She furthermore req uired (in this

letter I wrote) that a Palace should b e prep ared f or h er

in London either Buckingham House or Marlborough House

, ,

or an y other su itable residence . She sent identical protests

to Lo rd Castlereagh an d Lord Liverpool .
Bu t nothing came ofthese commu nications an d no en cour
m
,

age en t f rom Mr.B rou gham . Therefore early in May H er

m
, ,

Maj esty deter ined to cut the Gordian knot ofprocrastin a

tion an d abortive negotiation by proceeding to London . And
to this end set out for Calai s by way ofMilan an d Genev a.
At thi s latter place she was delayed some days by indi sp osi
tion but pressed on to Dijon having w ritten pre viously to
, ,

Lady Anne Hamilton an d Mr. Alderman Wood (lately Lord

Mayor ofLondon an d a most loyal subj ect to Her Maj esty)
,

to meet her on French soil . A little later she despatched a

co urier to Mr. Bro u gham commanding his atten dan ce at
,
 T HE Q UEEN RETUR NS TO EN GLAN D 277

St. Omer, near to Calai s ,

where she was timed to ive
arr on

the 3 0th ofMay.

Our cavalcade was considerable one notwithstanding that
m
a ,

the Q ueen had di smi ssed ost of her Itali an suite with the ,

exception ofCounts Bergami an d V assal i who were to leave ,

her at the end ofthe j ourney . There were fi ve carri ages an d ,

it was no easy matter to get them all horsed at the dif ferent
posting inns. In the fi rst rod e Berga i an d V assal i ; in the m
second H er Maj esty Annette an d Willi am Austin the
, , , ,

vehicle bei n g an Engli sh post chariot yellow body with

-
, ,

C . P W. on the panel s an d drawn by f our horses. A l arge

’
. ,

E n glish travelli n g carriage followed in which were Hownam ,

an d my sel f an d t wo calashes b rou

,
ght up the rear carrying ,

the men an d women domestics. It was a great company to

get through Italy S witz erland an d France especi al ] y the latter
, , ,

country wherein un der pressure from our King s Ministers

, ,
’

the Government had i ssued orders that no honours whatever

were to be shown to the Q ueen an d (I have no doubt) ,

se cretly gave in stru ctions for as m any d if fi cul ties as possible

to be thrown in her way. That there were many d if fi cul ties
which shoul d never have beset the travel ofa Royal Person
age an d m u
, ch less the Q ueen ofEngl and I an d Bergami had ,

f ull experience ; an d without his rob ust f oreign language an d , ,

perchance my cantankero us mouth we had not progressed

, ,

even at the poor pace we achieved . As it was the j ourney ,

took us a month ; so you will see that when I covered the

same in nine day s af ter the King s death I carried f
’
ull sail . ,

At Mo ulhard Lady Anne H amilton an d Mr. Alderm an

Wood met us. Al though the former was a person I ever
avoid ed I co u , ld not help being pleased an d amused to see
her n ow. Pleased because the presence ofsuch a D rag on n e ‘

de vertu e ( as H ’
e r M aje sty cal led her) aff
o rded m uch sati s

faction to the Q u een an d am used at the dead set the elderly

,

lady m ad e at Count Bergami an d the hardly in ferior at ten

tion she was pleased to bes tow on myself Indeed she was ,

so condescending as to engage me in a conversation on poli

278 T H E QUE EN CAN DO NO WR ONG
tics an d thrash out the q uestions ofthe Nation al Debt an d
,

Public Expenditure giving me some sound advice as to how

,

I was to vote on several fiscal m atters in the House.

Taking the ro ute by Mel un an d Abbeville so as to avoid ,

passing through Pari s we reached St. Omer on the evening of

,

the 3 l st ofMay to fi n d Mr.Brougham had not arrived . Here

,

the Q uee n engaged lodgings at the H otel de I An cien ue P aste

‘ ’
,

an d owing to her f atigue was compel led to keep to her bed

al l the next d a . In the meantime a cou rie r arrived from
y
Mr. Bro ugham announcing his speedy coming but with no ,

excuses or explanation given for his remissness in not having

been there fi rst.
H e arrived two days later acco m panied by Lord H utchin
,

son who was an intim ate an d con fi d en tial f

, riend ofthe King ,

a nd the b earer of a p roposition from His Maj esty for the

Q ueen s consideration .
’

The Q ueen gave them an interview at once. She m ade a

special toilette for the occasion wearing a rich twilled sarcenet
,

peli sse ofpauce colour lined with Royal ermine an d one of

, ,

the fashionable Leghorn willow hats then in vogue. I have

se ldom seen her look be tter f or the settled mel anchol ofh er

m y
,

face had f given way to ( what I ay call ) the Brunswick fi re

an d eagerness an d it was pl ain to see she was nerved f
,
or the

interview .
Mr. Brougham introd uced Lord H utchinson with the
remark that he was sincerely anxiou s to serve Her Majesty s
’

interests to the best of his abili ty an d the bearer of a

m
,

message fro the King .

‘
A message i cried Her Majesty . No no, my Lord no
”

,
—
conversation for me ! V ot you haf to say put it in de ,

writing ! Your M aster an d O ursel f are at war. And V e

haf too o f ten found de memory of conversations is short ,

an d do not a ree
g
m
She bathed him in a cold conte pt as she spoke for he ,

had once been a f riend of hers be fore he went over to the

280 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
So saying she extended her hand to each ofthem in turn
, ,

an d knee ling they ki ssed it V assal i very white an d the

m
, , , ,

tears roll ing down Berga i s whi skered cheek s in th e g rief ’

an d agitation that shook him who altho u g h he w a s an , ,

ad ventu rer was not withou

, t the instincts ofa true cavalier ,

d possessed the emotional Italian character.

L ate the next af ternoon which was S u nday Mr. Bro ugham, ,

called alone bringing a letter from Lord H utchinson contain

,

in g H is Maj esty s p roposal s an d han d ed it to the Q ueen ; b ut

‘

she wo u ld not accept it telling him to read the contents.

,

The let ter is well kno wn for a copy has been publ ished an d
m
, ,

a be r ad by a who choo ses. W h e ref

o re I wil l not
y e n
y
tran scribe it in full but merely content myself with saying
,

that the King s proposals app roved by his Mini sters were
’

, ,

that fi fty thousand pound s a year should b e settled on the

Q ueen for her li fetime in ret urn for which H er Majesty was
,

to undertake an d promise never to assume the style or title

of Q u een or an y title attached to the R oyal Family of
m
,

England an d further ore to bind hersel fnever to set foot

, ,

in the United Kingdom again .

Ou the other hand it threatened her with pro sec ution on
,

accou nt of her past conduct if she presumed to return to

England an d specifi call y in formed her that ifshe were so ill
,

advi sed as to di sregard thi s warning there wou ld be an end ,

to al l negotiation an d compromise .
Her Maj esty was at thi s moment suspicious of Mr.
, ,

Brougham inasmuch as he had crossed in the same b

, oat ,

travelled in the same chai se an d was putting up at the same ,

inn as Lord H utchinson an d this feeling prevailing caused , ,

her to decide to receive him an d listen to the letter of

proposals in the presence ofwi tnesses ; an d Mr. Wood an d
m ysel fbeing selected for this capacity I can tell youwh at ,

occurred from my own observation .

Whil st Mr. Brougham read the letter H er Majesty stood
m
,

facing hi eyeing his features with keen inqui ring glan ces
, , ,

an d (as her trembling f rame indicated ) restraining her indign ant

 THE Q UEEN RET U R N S TO EN GLAND 28 1

anger with the greatest dif ficulty . Wh en he had fi n ished she

asked him in a well -controlled voice :

And pray what is your opinion ofthese proposal s Mr.

, , ,

Attorney general
-

Mr. Brougham glanced up an d caught the expression on

her f ace . I cou ld have sworn an d after revelation proved it
, ,

that he had come with the intention ofpressing their accepta

tion on her. But fearless advocate great an an d great m
m
,

geni us though he were his power ofdiplo acy tran scended

,

al l his other q u al ities an d he cou , ld retreat from danger as

well as push an advantage to the cannon s mouth ofdebate. ’

There was a something in the Q ueen s grim expression before ’

which his hardihood died away ; his deep -set eyes after one ,

duel with hers dropped ; his long determined upper l ip

, ,

broke from its stern setting an d wavered ; his lean face

flushed as does a m an s who is found in a false position . H e
’

m
,

t
s a mme red an d sh uffl ed — I tel l youBrou gham stam ere d an d
shu ffled which no one had bel ieved possible did they not
,

—
witness it an d then changed front .
T he condi tion s are not such as I could ad vise Yo u r

Majesty to accept he said . But the Q ueen knew an d we

,
’
,

two witnesses knew that he had come there to support them .

,

Soh twas all Her Majesty vo uchsafed .

’ ’

m
,

At the same time argued Mr. Brougha with the

’
, ,

resou rce ofa lawyer it is open for Your Majesty to propose

,

counter conditions. ’

‘
Soh?
It will not commit Your Majesty in an y way for your ,

legal advisers ofcourse are responsible.

, ,
’

’
Soh .
And Your M aj esty knows best he went on gathering ,
’
,

courage an d with a peculi ar in flection in his voice an d a

,

hidden meaning in his words what policy is best fi tted to your

,

u
real sit a tion .
’

Ach cried the Q ueen an d blaz ed out at him as Eli z abeth

, ,

might have done. Our real situation ! Damn me Mr. ,

28 2 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG

Atto my gene e - l b ut I vill gifyoude k

ra , nowledge youdo n ot
apparently possess ofde real situ ation . D is d ay I set ou t for

England . In London an d in London only vill I consent to

, ,

listen to de proposal s ofde King ofEngl and . D at is my

an swer. Dat is de real situ ation Write -she pointed i m
p e riou sl
y to m ateri al s set ou t re ad y Q u ee f g
n o En lan d
vil l treat vid de Kin
g f o E u g la n d in L on d on an d n o od er ,

cl ock d is owrth da
“
l ce 1
”
A n d date u it fi f
’

y f J u
m
p a y o ve o o , n e ,
—
Write you write you te vite ! an d I vill sign
,
'

Mr. Brougham stumbled into the chair an d never I think , , ,

fashioned his letters so ill in al l his li f e before or after ! F or ,

oumight sa there was a whi rlwind ra ing in that room as

y y g
he wrote ! Her M aj esty had thrown of f al l restraint ; she
was sweeping u n d down the floor swirling an d brandi shin g

m p a ,

her ar s stamping her f

, eet swinging round impatiently at
, , ,

every turn as ifto meet a new antagonist . I tell you that

,

she fi l l ed the chamber with the inten sity an d vol u me ofher

passion fi l l ed it with her guttural German curses f
, illed ,

it with the indi gnation of an insulted an d outraged Queen .

Wood an d I d rew back to gi ve her the clear-way an d I vow ,

the Alderm an s knees were knocking together ! And for

’

Mr. Bro ugham did I assure you he was wincing at every

,

turn as if he were expecting a box on the ears I shall but

, ,

b e telling
y ou the tru th altho u gh youwi l l not believe me !
,

And yet I will swear he had his strategy disposed to shield

his head with his hand s if the attack came which he f eared ,

as m u ch as suspected !
I had often seen my dear Mi stress in her an gry moods an d ,

ifI have not told you ofthem it is becau se they did n ot

,

become her an d I would rather give youthe picture which I

,

have attempted to draw . But she truly had the impatien ce

an d the fi re ofa B ru n swick er an d when these were raft d on
, g e

the impotence ofthe womanly person they could on ly fi n d an

m
,

o utlet in these ad gusts of wayward action instead ofin

swords or blows. And when they took po ssession ofher she

was assu redly a woman possessed

284 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
An hour later di n ner was served an d H er Maj esty
m
,

honoured Mr. Brougham with taking his ar . She now

treated him as a subject an d a gentleman ofhigh station
m m
,

chatting on an y matters not ger ane to the occasion of

thei r meeting whilst Lady Anne Hamilton in trod uced
,

political subjects not unconnected with fi n an ce an d cross ,

questioned both Mr. Brougham an d mysel fon our orthod oxy

in relation to the vo te on the B udget . As it happened we
had both gone into the same lobby on one or two q uestion s
in Supply an d we became allies again st her. B ut faith she
, ,

beat us both an d m ade Her Maj esty laugh heartily at the

m
,

way she did it. In short you ay say that af , ter the sq uall , ,

the wind had shiflzed fai r an d everything betokened a

m
,

pleasant evening when some chance allusion was ade to

,

Lord H utchinson s departure an d Mr. Brougham o b served

’
,

that his Lord ship coul d not leave until the arrival of a
courier expected from Pari s.
Now, the truth ofthi s was that he said Cal ais but Her ,
’

Majesty mi sunderstood it for Paris ; at least so Mr. ’

,

Brougham declared to me afterward s though ifyouask me , , ,

the word I too heard was Paris. I t had the ef

, , fect of ’

giving the Q ueen alarm who yet kept her counten an ce with
,

a perf ect selfcontrol. But as a fact she conceived th at the

-
, ,

arrival of a co u rier from the capital of a cou ntry whose

Government was so f riendly to the King an d ( as thei r recent ,

behaviour had sho wn ) so inimical to herself prognosticated ,

danger ; that in short it might be some vile plot to intercept

, ,

her j ourney under p retence she was not p rovided wi th a

,

passport.
R i sing from the table H er Ma esty motioned to me to
j
m m
,

give her my ar an d said she would leave Mr. Bro ugha

,

to fin ish his wine an d expect him presently in the d raw

m
,

ing-roo to cof f
ee . And with that withdrew slowly an d
calmly .
Bu t no sooner gotten ou t ofthe room an d the doo r cl osed
m
,

behind us than she clutched my ar halffainting it WQ

- —
,
K ‘
 TH E Q UEEN RET UR NS TO EN GLAND 2 85

the only time in my life I ever beheld Caroline ofBrunswick

afraid — an d cried she in agitation

m
Shimmy ! Shi my ! Quick q uick ! Order my chariot ,

to be got ready d is instant ! And mount youa horse an d

gallop forward to Calais an d see d at dere is a change of
,

horses ready for me on de road . And engage a packet-boat ,

de ver f irst you do come upon to carry me d is night to

"

m
,

England F or b y
. Gott ,d ere is d an
g er in d ot cou
f
rier ro

I carried out her commands with the utmost alacrity.

Within fi ve min utes I was galloping do wn the Calais road ,

No sooner had I left her than H er Majesty under some excuse

m
, ,

su moned Mr. Wood f rom his wine an d with L ady Anne

m
,

H amilton an d An nette in her carriage an d H ieron y ous an d ,

Krack el er in a chai se behind her set ou t with al l speed f

, or

the port.
Bu t as she drove ou t of the yard ofthe Inn she co uld not
m
,

resi st leaving thi s sarcast ic message for Mr. B ro ugha (who

was a little thick over his wine) that the Q u een would drink
,

coff ee with him in London instead ofin the drawing-room

At eleven o fthe night wit h the

, pa cket -bo at P rin ce L eo old
p
chartered I met Her Majesty at the outskirts ofCal ais an d
, ,

told her everythin g was ready except that the tide would not
,

serve to get ou t ofthe harbou r till six o clock the next

’

morning. But that I had arranged for the boat to be warped

ou t into the middle ofthe harb our an d under the protection
,

ofthe Engli sh flag she wou ld be perfectly safe .

Well done she cried an d was then pleased to ad d too
m
, ,

graciously : Shimmy ever does do y business vid his big

best possible an d d at is better d an an y von else s
,
’

Hearing about the state of the tide Mr. Wood ventured ,

to propose to Her Maj esty to repose at D E stain g s fi n e ’ ’

hotel an d embark the next orni n g.

,
m
‘
No no cried the Q ueen . Drive straight to the quay . I
,
‘

do sleep d is night under de British flag an d no oder. ,

”
28 6 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
T he horses were whipped on an d the quay reached an d
m
,

by the light ofthe chariot s l an tho s the Queen ofE n gland

’

picked her way through the d ust an d rubb ish an d across the ,

plank gangway on to the packet boat. -

Dere she exclaimed as soon as her f oot touch ed the

m
,

deck now I can breathe freely ! Now I a protected by

,

de Engl ish l aw s ! And a fi g for d at courier from Paris ! ’

Then turning to me : Shimmy you are a sailor. I do ask

m
, ,

you to keep de v atch al l night . And ifde re is an

y atte pt
m ade to board de ship repel it Shimmy an d cut ad rift
m
, , ,

cu t ! Promise me Shim y d at youvill protect your

t ad ri f , ,

Q ueen
—
And so yousee the great honour fell to me her h umble
Charity b —
oy to escort My Lad y Kind an d Bo u nti ful an d
Good to the J ason frigate when it bore her away fro
, , m
England an d also to the packet boat P rin ce L eopold when
,
-

she was retu rning Q u een of the Land . Twas a strange ’

,

coincidence as
you m
, ust think an d yet happen ed even as I
,

have told it you.

All that night I kept watch with the gangway up sen
m
, ,

tinels posted an d the strictest orders to prevent an y co

m
,

un ication from the shore . At one o clock of th e morn

’

came a hail . It was a cou rier for H er M aj esty wi th de ,

s atches f om M . Brou gh m n d Lo rd H utchin son . I hov

m
p r r a a e

a line into the boat an d bade the an bend on his lette rs

m
, ,

an d so got them ab oard he swearing they were of the ost

m
,

urgent i portance .
So I took it upon me to send them do wn into the cabin ,

where the Queen was reposing on a m attress laid on the deck.

She chanced to be awake an d having read the despatches
m
, , ,

sent ou t word She wou ld not trust Mr. Brougha ( who

implored her to return if only for the night to D E stain g s

, ,
' ’

hotel himsel fguaranteeing her from harm ) an d to tell Lord

, ,

H utchinson who begged Her Majesty to wait at Calai s un til

,

he could send an express to the King an d get further in

 CHAPTE R XXI
EN GLAND S
’
WELCOME

Ar one o clock on Monday , the 5th ofJun e, Her Maj

’ ’
est s
'

y
oot touched B ritish soil again , after an exile of nearly six
f
years an d in the absence of orders to the contrary the
, , ,

garrison at Dover sal uted the Q ueen with a royal sal vo ,

whilst from the cro wded shore there broke the thun ders of
m ultitudin ous cheers.
Her Majesty who was leaning on the ar ofMr. Alderm an
, m
Wood was vi sibly af
, fecte d by the fervour an d sincerity of
thi s reception . Hers was a heart hard as i ron when opposed
by contumely or tested by ill-treatment but mel ted q uic kly ,

by kindness. Even so now as she stopped an d bowed before

,

this gust of enthusias m an d then slowly m ad e her way

,

towards the carriage provided for her amid st cries particu , ,

l arl y f rom the v ast n umber of well -d rest old an d young

f emales who had assembled of God b less her S he hath a
m
,

n ob l e spirit S he u st b e in n ocen t

Ouseating hersel fin the carriage the popul ace crowded on

al l sid es an d in a twinkling removed the ho rses an d d rew
, ,

the vehicle them selves to the S hip Inn preceded by m usic an d

,

flags bearing loyal inscriptions an d sal u , ted her with lo ud

acclam ation s as she passed into the b u ilding.
After a short repose the Queen started for Canterbury at
s ix o clock it being arranged she sho u ld sleep there on her
’
,

way to London . In her carri age were Lady Ann e H amil ton ,

Annette an d Mr. Wood . The conj unction ofher Lad yship

,

[ 233 l
 EN G LA N D S WELCO ME 28 9
’

an d m
the Alder an led to an incident very ludicrous were it ,

not ill -timed . T he worthy Wood who was as vulgar as he ,

was honest appropri ated the back seat of the carri age next
,

to the Q ueen to the inten se indignation of Lad y Anne a

, ,

Duke s daughter who yet dared not exhibit her annoyance

’

in public an d was compelled to smi rk an d smile her best

, ,

with anger hatred malice an d al l uncharitableness bubbling

, , ,

an d seething in her sou l against the civic magn ate ! And for
the durability ofher ill temper you ay read ( an d smile at)
- m
her Opinion ofMr. Alderman Wood in her book wherein she ,

doth sco urge that hapless individ ual an d naively let the cat of
'

her can tan k er out of the b ag by her ref erence to thi s ve ry

m
incident I a telling youabout !
At Canterbury Sittingbourne Chatham Gravesend Dart
, , , ,

ford an d al l the l esser villages on the road the Q ueen was

, ,

welcomed by voci ferous m ultitudes shouting L on g l ive o u r ,

raciou Q u t o whom she responded by showi n g her f ace

g s e en

at the window an d wavi n g her han dkerchief an d ( not to be

m
, ,

re i ss in her own loyalty ) did several times remind the opu

p
lace ofthe respect d ue to thei r King an d hersel fgave them ,

m
an example by crying L on g l ive Kin g George the F owrth
,

the which was I take it ore an expression of her pio us

, ,

d uty than her pleasin g desire !

Outhe af ternoon ofthe 6th an untoward accident occurred
at Shooter s Hill . One ofthe horse s d raggin g the Qu een s
’ ’

chariot fell an d there was considerable con fusion an d some

,

d an ger to herself. A like mi schance had also happened I —

sho u —
ld h ve mentioned it before as we were entering the
a

town ofSt. Omer four days pre viously. From thi s repetition
—
my Lady nne Hamilton with her singular ineptitude for
A
saying things nobody wishes to be told — ust draw a croakin g m
omen ! I vow to you that woman from fi rst to last was a , ,

Spoil -sport a Kill -j oy an d a Drag oness of Dismality— con

, ,

found her
The delay this occas ioned gave time for the people to
con gregate an d by the ti
, m
e we reached G reenwich there were
19
290 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRONG
gathered in Her Maj est s track the most marvell ou
y
’
s escort

an d train ofloyal su bjects that ever an y Queen hi ved since

the days ofgood Q ueen Bess when Greenwich was a Ro yal
,

Seat an d famous for its aq uatic spectacles an d fest ivals.

,

Here my Mistress sought a little rest at the Green Man but ,

was presently pre vailed u pon to exhibit herself at the

windows an d respond to the clamorous greetings of the
,

populace. She was drest soberly in a black twil led

sarcenet gown , a f ur tippet an d ruf f with a hat of black ,

satin an d f eathers so that there might be no hau

, nting of
bright co l ours on her part or an y gay show ofostentation .
m
,

A little later Her Maj esty resu ed her j ourney preceded

m
,

an d f ollowed by a cavalcad e esti ated to stretch over three

miles ofroadway her route bein g cleared for her by a B rigad e
,

of mou nted gentlemen . Crossing over Westminster B ridge ,

the intention had been to proceed to South Audl ey Street

( whe e the Q ueen w to lod ge in ho u belon i g to
m
r as a se g n

Mr. Alder an Wood ) by way of Piccad il ly b ut her sel f

consti tuted escort either by accident or design selected the
, ,

ro ute by Pal l Mall which carried the R oyal chariot past

,

Carl ton House.

Taken unawares an d overawed by the concourse the
m
, ,

sentries at the Kin g s residence presen ted ar s a reeab l e to

’

g ,

the impu lse which through the entire city had caused every
, ,

hat to be respectf ully dotted in most cases voluntarily b

, ut , ,

where there was a churli sh rel uctance by compulsion .

m
,

Thus slowly an d in regal state Queen Carol ine co pleted

, ,

her home -coming . Arrived at 77 South Audley Street she at

, ,

-
once ascended to the d rawin g room on the fi rst floor where ,

tea was served ; an d af ter she had ref reshed hersel f con sented ,

to appear on the balcony in respon se to the plaud its of the

crowd . The street was one dense m ass of hum an beings
stre tching aw ay in a compact m ass in to al l the side streets.

S uddenly there rose a roar that was taken up an d re-echoed

by the many thousands out ofsight but within hearin g . It ,

was the occasion of Her Maj esty stepping out on to the

292 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
picture tracts an d political pamphlets I tell you those
m
,

foul- on eyd cowards could not have paid more to their

’

prin ters or hired authors more di sgusting in their language

, ,

had they educated a Billingsgate fi sh-wif e to write in order

that she m ight vili f y a customer who doubted ofthe fresh
ness ofher fi sh an d used gol d type for printing her abuse .
,

In the middle ofJune there was an abortive attempt at a

compromi se which the Q ueen considered it as her d uty to
,

of fer even at the ri sk ofappearing to seek it which she did

, ,

not. The Duke ofWellington an d Lord Castlereagh acted

for the King an d Mr. Brou , gham an d Mr. Denman for H er
Majesty . They met at Lord Castl ereagh s house in St. ’

James s Sq uare to exchange their protocols but nothin g

’
,

came of it an d on the fi fth anniversary of the Battle of

,

Waterloo it was an nounced in the Houses ofParli ament that

the negoti ations between the King an d Q ueen had failed .
And now the Queen sent a comm unication to the Speaker for
presentation to the House ofCom on s ann o uncing th at inm , ,

con seq uence of the measures pursued again st her honour an d

her peace f or some time by secret agents ab road sh e f
elt ’

m
,

co pelled to address them . And proceeded to declare she

courted an investigation ofher cond uct so long as it was an
open an d not a secret one as was threatened knowing that
, ,

al l the base charge s m u st fall to the

gro und as had all ,

previo us libel s during the past fourteen years. And in con ,

cl usion regi stered her solemn prote st against the omi ssion of
,

her name f rom the litu rgy an d the ref usal of an an swer or
,

an y attention to her application f or a R oyal residence in

London as befi tted her station .

,

Thi s message was received with repeated cheers by the

Op position when it was read to the House by Mr.Brougham .
A debate f ollowed in which to the d isco fi ture of the
, m
Ministers an d the confusion of Castlereagh Mr. C anning , ,

President ofthe Indi a Board m ade a most eloquent speech on

,

H er M ajesty s behalf exclaimin g once in his intensity : So

’

m
,

hel p me God I wi l l never put ysel fin the situation of an

,
 ENG LA ND S WE L COME 2 93
’

accuser towards the Q ueen And to his honour an d credit

ris u ed the displeas u re o f the Ki n g an d the cold shou lde rs of
q
his f ellow members in the Cabinet an d preserved that proper
-
,

attitu de to the en d .
V ery soon af ter this was taken the second step in the
tragic d rama for the Queen s undoing Lord Liverpool
’
.

moved that the contents ofthe sealed Green B g the lying a —

venom spawned by the spies an d common informe rs who were
examined by the Milan Commi ssion —should be sub itted to m
a Secret Committee offi f teen members ofthe Hou se ofLords

for a R eport . T he resol u tion was carried by a maj ority of

fif teen an d a Committee appointed which contained several
,

notorious enemies ofthe Queen .

Ou the 4th ofJ ul y thi s Secret Committee presented its
Report decl aring the necessity ofulterior proceedings against
,

Her Maj esty an d Lord Liverpool forthwith introduced into

,

the Upper House a B il l ofP ain s an d P en al ties or in other , ,

word s a Bill f or the De radation an d Divorce ofthe Q u een

, g
of E n gl and at the su it of a husband who was the most
notoriously unfaithful an d incontinent in al l England !
And so after twenty years of stealthy an d pertinacious
,

striving the First Gentlem an in Europe accompli shed his

,

desi re an d set his Consort up in the common pillory

,

Sir Thomas Tyrwhitt Deputy Usher of the Bl ack R od

, ,

waited upon H er Majesty to inform her ofthe decision ofthe

m
Lo rd s. She received hi w1th great calmness heard what he ,

had to say an d replied,

T he King an d I wi l l not meet in thi s world ; b ut I h ope

we shall in the next (a n d pointing
, h er h and to He a ve n ,

added with r e at emphas i s) whe re J u stice will be ren d ered

g
to me
Aye there an d there only
, ,

Al l thi s harrowing persec ution had its ef ect on the public

f
mind . With each new insult levied at her the popularity of
the Q ueen increased The vitriol ofher enemies served as
.

oil to ad d fuel to the fervour of her adherents. When she

294 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
took her ai rings abroad she was cheered amaz i n gly an d
, ,

of tentimes the m u ltitude in their excited loyalty would un

, ,

horse her carriage in the public parks or streets an d drag it ,

them sel ves.

Once when I was in attendan ce the Q ueen chan ced to
, ,

meet the Princess Sophi a on the same road ridi n g in a ,

chariot an d four with outriders. Her R oyal H ighn

stu diously ref rained f rom an y recogn ition of H er Maj esty .
Thi s was observed by some ofthe populace who stopped the ,

Princess s chariot an d with clamorous shouts of d isapprob

’

m
, , a
tion toward s her person compell ed her coachman an d foot en
,

to take of f thei r hats to the Queen an d there might have ,

been a riot but for Her Maj esty s presence ofmind in ord er ’

ing her coachman to drive on with al l despatch.

On the other hand neither the King n or his Mini sters
,

could go abroad without being hooted . There was a great

p rej udice again st the Duke ofWellington the Marqui s of
Hertford the Marq uis ofAnglesey an d Lord Sid outh in
,

particul ar toward s whom the general f

,

eeling was very bitter

,

m
, ,

an d the windows of thei r ho u ses broke with ston es. The

m
D uke was ever ost rudely assailed an d on one occasion ,

compelled to take of fhis hat an d cry God save the Q ueen

m
,

which he did with an ill grace an d ad ded : And ayal l your

-
,

wives be like her Truly a saying worthy by accident of , ,

so great a personality altho u gh not meant in the spirit an d

,

sen se that I attach to it. That is to say the D u ke esteemed

, ,

the greatest warrior we ever possessed after Marlborough con ,

ceived he was in su lting the people with his sarcasm . B ut look

y ou in the fi rst pl ace his Grace was no
, , an to sneer at a m
woman who was so notoriously undertheir thumbs an d in the
, ,

second pl ace C aroli n e o f

,
B run sw ick po ss essed a mo ral courage
an d a pe rson a l bra ve ry in no wi se in f er io r to the D uk e s an d
’
,

h a d the peop l e o f Engl a nd been b l e ss ed with wi v es as b rave

as she then tru
,
ly the country would have been an Am az onian
land an d your scurvy House ofLord s swept out ofexi sten ce
,

—as it deserved to be !
 2 96 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
T he o to Hammersmith was also completely lin ed with
r ad
people lad ies at every window waving white pocket-han d ker
,

chiefs an d only one cry heard God save the Queen

,

And so she passed Westward in the track ofthe setting ,

sun And took up her residence in the house wherein she

was to die or ever a year an d a d ay had passed !

Well now I m ust give you a little of y own story that

,
m
has been l aid by whil st I d isco ursed these m atters.

As soon as the Q ueen was establi shed in Lo n don I ret urned

to my residence in Bloom sbury b ut with the honour con f erred
m
,

on me to act as H er Ma est s Extra Eq u

j y
’
er ry when y Pa rli a

mentary duties permitted . Sir William Gell who was now ,

Chamberl ain an d in charge ofthe Q ueen s household was ever ’

m
,

a good f riend ofmine ; so it c a e to thi s that I arranged my ,

own hours whe n it would be practicable for me to be in

attend ance an d in his ordering of the arrange ents he
,
m
con formed to my convenience.
I need scarce tell you that so far as my Parli amentary
labours were concerned I did what was in my power to
,

f urther the Q ueen s cause. But thi s was not di f

’
ficult f
m
or , ,

i rrespective of party the Ho use of Co mons carri ed a l arge

m
,

m aj ority in favour of H er M aj esty inas uch as it was ,

su bservient to the electors an d few dared go contrari wi se to

,

the expressed opinion ofthe commonalty unless they sat for

close boroughs.
Surges was an early caller at my house when I ret urned .
We had kept up a correspondence d uring the time I was
ab road f or with al l his fau lts he was a an I ever did love m
m
, , , ,

an d do still an d now in my ol d a e
, g y b est friend . W hen
his letters reached me in Italy I did not f ail to acq u aint my
si ster ofwho my correspondent was. At the which she co u ld
not di sg uise her feel ings ofinterest though allowing he rse l f
,

to give n o actual expression to them . Well I j ust mentioned ,

the receipt ofeach letter casually as it were but never gave

m
, , ,

her a message f rom him ofthe m an

y th at he sent the si ple ,
 EN GLAN D S WELCOME 2 97
’

r eference to him being suf fi cien t. As I could see when Annette

began to scan my eyes after the arri val ofa budget to fi n d
ou t whether I had heard f rom hi . m
I wanted nothing more favourable than that an d the ore , m
she scanned my f ace the less in f
ormation I af forded her. For
your priz e is eas iest captured when youmake pretence to be
steering another cou rse an d keep you
, r colours down . And

there was A n nette s pride to be taken into con sideration who

’

had been twice j ilted . Or ifnot jilted certainly treated in ,

su ch a way as no woman read ily forgives .

I saw with sati sfaction that she was again allowing hersel f
to think abo ut Surges without indign ation an d no request to ,

me not to mention his name . When I returned to Engl and

Winsome an d I talked the m atter over a good deal ; for
Surges had won my wife over to his side who was his absol ute ,

enemy at fi rst by the mod esty an d diplom acy of his

,

behaviour H e was now a constant visito r at our house an d

. ,

like to spoil my eldest son an d hin ting he would esteem it a

,

privilege to stand God father to the child that was coming

an d soon arriv ed . And was a boy an d called H astings,

Surges Tempest after him . So you see we were com rades

m
,

a a
8 .

I t was bout the middle of Jul y that the child was

a

chri stened an d up to thi s time there had been no meeting

,

b etween Annette an d Surges for she was kept in close ,

attendance on H er Maj esty who was the greatest obstacle of

,

an y in Su rges way. Bu t Annette was necessitated to come

”

to the ceremony ofn aming ou r l ast born ; an d so was asked

-
,

with a hint given her that Col onel S urges would be there in
his capacity as God f ather so that she might fi n d some excu
, se

to avoid comi n g unless she desi red it. To which she

,

replied that Of co urse she was comi n g to see my child

chri stened
”
.

Whereupon I took courage . Winsome you m ust under ,

stand was in no state of health to be agitated at thi s time

, ,

or the thing wo u ld have been accomplished m uch sooner ; but

 298 T HE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WR ONG
the last few weeks before her lying -in she was in too n ervous
a con dition to be allowed an ex citement . I asked A n n e tte
y
ifshe wo u ld stan d God mother. To which she re pli ed she
was su r rised I had not asked her bef
p ore an d wo u ld h a ve ,

taken it very ill ofme had I failed to do so now . By which

y m
ou a see al l was working well . And indeed worked ou
y t , ,

j ust as Win some an d I hoped it would : Annette there at the

christening an d Surges there an d the lovi n g cup to go
m
, ,

ro u nd an d be drunk by both of the an d the past forgot , ,

an d hope f or the f uture.

I admi red Surges for his behaviour that d ay who being , ,

present f irst in the room advanced when Ann ette entered

, ,

an d hold ing ou
, t his hand as f rankly as
yo u m ig ht wish ,

Mi ss Tempest said he if youwill give me your han d in

,
”
,

friendship I shal l esteem it a very noble kindn e s s on you r

’

par
.t .

An d she gave him her hand without a word n or ever asked ,

rom him . T was very sweet an d f

an expl an ation f orgi ving of
my si ster I vow who had the Te pest temper evil when
, , m ,

ro u sed but amaz ing tender when appealed to. Not that I
,

would have you suppose that I mysel f claim to possess it

m
,

saving the evil part . Otherwise I believe I a no ten derer

hearted than my fellow -men .
Well the christening ( which was performed in our drawing
,

room so that Win some might be presen t ) wen t of

, fwith great
é cl at . We had a f ine compan y present f or my wi f
e was on e ,

who gathered m any friends around her an d I had my fellow

m m
,

embers fro Irelan d whose politics an d mine brought

,

together in a brotherhood that rejoiced in common when a

young patriot was born to think here was another an -child
, m
come to stand up for the Race.
An d I vow it was a pretty sight to see An nette hand the
babe to the clergyman for to be baptiz ed ; an d Surges stan d
ing respectfully b y an d d evouri n g her with his eyes an d
, ,

an swering t he respon ses in a clerkly tone an d com orti n g

m p ,

hi sel f most proper an d God fatherl y. And when the

 C HAPTE R XXII
T H E PEA C OC K S
’
FEAT HER
WHE N the Q uee n m
oved to B randenburgh H ouse she
req uested me to atten d her there an d go into residence, ,

desiring my ful l services as her Equerry the which Winsome , ,

being now recovered I was abl e an d anxious to render. F or

,

H er Majesty had f all en into a grievo u s state of hea lth her ,

nerves shattered by the cruel mental torture she was compel l ed

to endure to whom no specif
,
ormation was vo uchsafed
ic in f
with regard to the charges to be pressed against her but only ,

a tho u sand ru mours ci rcul ated an d her position m ade the

,

more intolerable by the uncertainty an d exaggeration ofwhat

was to happen . Bu t thro u gh it al l she carried herself ,

in public with the splendid co urage ofher race showing a

, ,

brave front to the world notwithstanding th at in p rivate , ,

her humi l iated heart was shook with emotion an d h er eyes

m
,

weeping scalding tears ofshame an d i sery.

I cannot te l l youal l the rumours that j ostled each other ,

like foul bats di sturbed from a cave . There was gossip about
the witnesses who were being imported ( as youmight say) by
,

the shipload an d mobbed at Dover on l anding whenever they

,

were recogni sed an d forced to proceed to London by stealth

m
,

an d un frequented b y
-r o ad s an d enter the capital at
, idnight
when the city slept . Some ofthem so low in thei r breed ing ,

an d so foul an d repul sive in thei r personal habits t hat those ,

who had been engaged to give them lodging refused to do so ,

an d they had to be secretly shipped b ack to the C ontinen t by

way ofH arwich as in stru , ments too dirty for the j ob
l 3 00 l
 T HE PE A COC K S F E AT H E R
’
3 01

Then there was a very disq uieting report that an Italian

priest was being bro ught to En gland for the purpose of
absolvin g the King s Witnesses f
’
ro m
the sin ofperjury so ,

that they might swear lies at large with no dan ger to their ,

sou ls !
Again it was said huge bribes had been given to secure
,

respectable witnesses t wo at leas t being retained at a f ee of

m m
m
,

One H undred Pounds a onth each. And for the acco o

dation ofal l the wretches there were speci al bui l dings erected
in Cotton Yard adjoinin g the House ofLords (into which
,

they might be sm uggled without necessity to face the people) ,

al l closed rou nd with a barricade the windows nailed fast

m
, ,

an d only one en trance thereto f ro the river an d that ,

g uarded by sentinel s from H is Majesty s G uards. Within ’

,

accommodation f or some hundred person s an d a great stock of ,

victual s liquor an d provisions l aid up lest the populace

, , ,

sho u ld blockade the pl ace .

Fin al ly there was a Spy -Master a most ysterious person
, ,
m
age never to be seen yet ever in evidence by the ru mours
m
,

that gathered around hi . Y ou might ascribe to him

su pern atural powers by the stran ge things he was credited
with havin g effected . Letters stole libels ci rcul ated against
,

the Queen rehearsals gone through ofthe Trial for the correct
m
,

m anuf acture ofevidence witn esses bro u ,

ght fro the grave
or at least prod u ced who were thought to be dead the n u ,

ac cou ntable disappearance of others who were n ot favourable

to the King s cause conversations overheard an d those who
’

, ,

took part in them warned by anonymous letters I tell you —

there was nothing he was not believed to be at the bottom of ,

with his threats an d bribes an d secret promi ses an d plottin gs.

, ,

H e was said to be an un f rocked parson named Dr. V al py

a very J esu it at intrigue an d a d rill -sergean t to boot in the

m
, , ,

way he d o in eerd it over his witnesses an d saw to the di sci

’

m
,

pline an d d ue subordination ofthe villain s under hi not

m
,

one ofwhom could leave their con fi n e en t without his written

order,
302 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO W RONG
Oh I tell you it was most outrageous an d m ad den in g to
,

hearofall these men an d things ofhints an d inn uend oes about

,

hostile evidence ( some intended to throw the Q ueen s advisers ’

offthe tru e track ) an d nothing to be catched hold ofan d

,

throttled
Then there were the vile pamphlets an d pictured t racts for
sale in the gu tters with most diab
, olic, bestial an d obscene ,

caricat ures ofthe Q u een an d her Italian su i te an d presen tly , , ,

ofher E n glish f ollowing with fi l thy bawdy verses. Not one

, ,

ofas escaped these coward ly libels that were to be f o und in

the King s newspapers (such as the J ohn B un edi ted by Mr.
’

Theodore Hook who prostituted his pen to insult a Q ueen

,

for a wage oftwo tho u sand po unds a year) as well as in the

garbage sold in the gutters an d also paid for by the King s
,
’

agents. And it was to one of these disgu sting li b

e l s that

m ust be charged the event I a going to relate. m

It was T uesd ay the 15th ofA ugust the d ay ofthe funeral
, ,

of the D u chess ofYork an d b ut two days before the date

,

fi xed f or the Bill of Pains an d Pen al ties that early in the ,

mor ning I received an ex press from S urges saying he wished

to see me on a most particular private business an d would ,

call that afternoon at Bran denburgh House trustin g I should ,

be able to excuse myselffrom attendance on Her M aj esty for

that occasion .
As it happened the Q ueen had a f ancy f or a trip on the

water that d ay an d p roceeded down the river on her royal

,

barge which m ade it easy f or me to excu se my sel f F or with

m
, .

He r Majesty ever so kind an d gracious to e I had b

, ut to ,

beg a favour an d it was granted .

,

So I stop ped at home to receive S u rges wondering what

m
,

his partic u lar private business might b e. And ca

m
e to

ponder ofthe an him self. A an with much good in him m ,

but spoiled b y h aving served as a soldier an d imbibed those ,

dam n able ridicul ous stilted notions common to the gay red
, ,

coat. Above an d beyond al l a horror of anything in the

m
,

shape of c ritici sm ofhim sel f or ofthose with who he was

3 04 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
‘
Jimmy , he said an d drew a pamphlet from his pocket
’
, ,

look at that An d he held open a page whereon was an

m
obscene an d abo inable picture ofthe Queen an d her suite.
The thing was too disg usting to look at an d my in c lination ,

to take it from Surges an d tear it up. But he held on to it

fast an d when I t u
, rned my ey es away rather than b efoul the m
with such a sight repeated indignantly
m
,

Look at it ! Look at it ! For it is your sister who

they have dared to depict here . By God ! Jimmy your ,

si ster

This is no thing for youor I to look on or take notice of ,

’

said I sternly . We who serve Her Majesty m ust suf fer

with her. ’

We men can sufi er said he. Suf er an d b

f e p ro u
'

,
’
d to. ,

u u —
B t not o r isters not the wom en we love ! By God ! I
s

tell you I can stand it no longer! This is the thi rd vile

insult to Annette an d once it was a— was worse than this
,

w hich is portrayed . It m ust cease

Have you a remedy P I asked him . Y ou know who is
’

behind al l thi s fi l th ? Y ou know on whose behalf it is

sp awned

I have a remedy . ’

What is your remed y P ”

F or yo ur si ster to leave Bran d enbu rgh Ho u se . F or h er to

seek ref uge under yo ur own roof. ’

And d esert the Q ueen P ’

H e shuf fled with the q uestion in a way I liked not.

Mi ss Tempest s proper place is under your roo f.
’ ”

Indeed
Under your roo f be repeated . T his cannot b
,
’
e a p roper

place for a pure woman that places her in an eq uiv ocab le

position to be insulted like this H e crushed the pa phlet m
in his fi st an d ground it as though to reduce it to its o rigin al
,

pulp .
T is the price we have to pay who have the hon o u
"
r to
serve H er M ajesty I told hi .
,
’
m
 THE PE ACOC K S FE AT H ER 3 05
’

The honour he echoed i ronically striding up an d down ,

the room . T he honour! By God sir ! there is no honour in

m
,

—
it for a wo an as I should have thought you her brother
,

would have been the fi rst to perceive

I was nettled at thi s speech but kept my temper. ,
‘
I d o not go a-seeking for this fi l th I told him . T is ,
’ ’

y ou who come an d shove it unde r my no se. I do not thank

ouf or if oum u
or it ; f st know the tru th in such a pecu li ar
y y , ,

case where ignorance is bliss tis folly to be wise .

,
’ ’

I do not hold with you said he. Here is dishonour

,
’

—
insult abomination ! T is hawked in the public streets. A
’

m an cannot help b ut see it. And having seen it would you ,

have me to swal low it ? By G od sir ! that is not my view of ,

—
the necessities ofthe case an d I hope it is not yours He
flas hed ro und very heated in his man ner an d f
, aced me hold , ,

ing his hand out still grind in g the crunched -up pamphlet with
,

his sc rewing fi n gers.

I conceive the greatest hono ur ofal l is to suf fer for Her
Majesty . ’

F or your sister to su ff
er ? For her to be depicted as
a He broke of fwith a stormy oath an d swung up an d ,

down the chamber again his in dign ation too intense for
,

word s.
Annette m ust suf fer I told him . It is in the Scheme
’
,

of Fate. Her Maj esty has been as a mother to Annette

d myself. ’

Suffer like this i he cried an d again held out his clenched

"
,

fi st. u f
f l
S e ike this
r —
No no ! It is intolerable ! T is
more than an y subj ect is called upon to do I protest I
I — will not permit it
I did not relish this usurpation ofmy proper authority .
Bu t still held my temper u nder control .
Then put a stop to these damnable libels ; pink the
anony ou m s libellers I told him . Or hold your tongue ,

an d do not come to make matters worse by y ou r cursed

of u
ficio sn ess
3 06 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO W R ONG
Butyour si ster he cried . Your si ster
,
’

I can think ofno one s suf ferings but Her Maj esty s.
’ ’ ’

‘
J immy said he pulling up an d looking f
’
urtively at e m
m
, ,

fro under his bro ws is Her Maj esty bl ameless P

,
"

What do you mean i I demanded who never tho ught to

"
,

have such a q uestion put to me.

‘
The D uke he said ( meaning the Duke of Welli n gton
’

m
, ,

for whom he had a person al f eeling of revere nce a o unting

to idolatry) the Duke is against her. He hath been the
m
,

Saviour ofEngland. He is an honest an . ”

Do you follow the Duke I asked him with al l the ,

contempt I could express.

I follow my own in tel l igen ce he stammered. Then hold ,
’
,

ing the crunched up pamphlet in his grind ing fi st be fore my

-

, m
eyes as if to point his oral I have eyes to see an d ears to
,
‘
,

hear. I have seen with my own eyes an d heard with my own ,

ears I have the memory ofa certain masquerad e be f o re me.

And I have a conviction that Her Majesty cannot an swer

the charges bro ught against her. The D uke says
Damn the Duke I cried breaking in upon his speech. ,

Before you quit this room you shall cry God save our
in n ocen t Qu
mm
een

Hahe ej aculated an d caught his breath ; for y outh

,

had gro wn very cantankero u s an d my chin obstinate ., An d ,

ou the provocation the f ellow w as giving me !

see
y ,

God save our in n ocen t Queen I I will m ake you ”

Aye
cr it as the mob m ad e you r damned D u ke cr it w ith his
y y ,

head bared . God save our in n ocen t Queen R epeat the

words
Jimmy he sai d I cannot be coerced . Con vin ce me
’ ‘
, , ,

an d
Convince you! Aye I will Colonel S urges I shouted
, , ,

my evil temper out of al l control . Convince you with

stee l — youwho d are to hint a do ubt ag ain st My Lad y Ki n d

an d Bou ul an d Good
nti f And repeated in a high voice
Go od —
, ,

Good — Good ! As her dear dead daughter sware

308 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
H e was a m
better swords an than I havin g al l the fein ts ,

an d flashes of the Raj poots of Ind ia who are accou nte d ,

swordsmen beyond cavil with the style of weapons we were

using . It was no delicate thrust an d parry af fai r but cut ,

d come again with death contingent on every stroke were

,

it n ot guard ed . My blood ( as you wil l have pe rceived ) was

in a deliri um an d with the war-cry T he Quee n ! T he
m
,

Q ue en ” on.my lips I batte red at him an d d ro ve hi ro und ,

the chamber.
Ever on his defence but never strikin g at me the which I
, ,

was too passion - bl in d to observe. Never striking tho ugh he ,

might with his superior skill have wounded me a score of

m
, ,

ti es not to have it swept my head ofi

'

mm
, ,

At l ast I got him into a corner an d conceived in y ad ,

folly he was at my mercy .

Sayit I shouted bet ween my hu rricane ofblow s.
,

u
save o r in n ocen t Qu
m
een

I saw him falter an d then his chin set fi r . A resol ution

m
,

came into his hand so e face ; his foot advanced for the fi rst ,

time d uring our encounter an d he attacked not stren uously

, , ,

but sufficient to fling me back on my def ence an d no longer ,

able to m ake headway again st him .

Foot by foot he outm atched me an d yet never gav e e the m

m
,

cou d e gwice.
p Ou tm at ched me an d f
o rced e bac k to the ,

centre ofthe room an d there changed his tacties again an d

, ,

stood on his def ence once more . And I so blind I could not
see it !
Clashed our swords on ce more I ever crying , , The Queen !

T he Queen

When h dow darkened the window an d as I cried an d

a s a ,

smote — Her Maj esty entered the room by way ofthe lawn .
In an other moment she was in the centre ofthe carpet her ,

fan darting between u s as she comm anded :

H al te hi I
’

Instantly obedien t to her order we fell away

, , fm
ro on e
another ou r swords grou
, nded .
 THE PEACOCK S FEATHE R ’
3 09

rom Su
She looked sternl y f rges to mysel f
m
.
V ot does dis mean she de anded.
I had n ot even the wit to sal ute till I saw Surges do so,

an d followed his example .

Soh cried Her Majesty suddenly recogni sing Surges as he
,

li fted his head an d brought it into the light. Knitted her

brows inq ui ringly an d looked at him an d then at me an d , ,

again at him an d lastly at me an d asked f

, or an expl an ation .
,

Shimmy vot does d is conduct mean

,

I was silent. F or al l in an instant my blood had cooled ,

an d my senses retu rned to me. And yet left me not so

incomparably cool as S urges drawn erect not a hair ofhi
, ,
m
turned not a tremor in his hand as he brought his sword to
,

attention .

But I was swaying about p u ffed an d winded my weapon

, ,

shaking in my sp f om excit ement d the sudden rever

m
gra r a n

sion oftension . In short I tell you, Jim y Rabbit m ade a

m
,

poor exhibition ofhimsel fnext door to the soldier an -

Before I had time to collect my thoughts to of fer an y

su itable exc use for being thus found brawling in Her
Majesty s dining room Annette entered , only to be d u
’
-
,
m
founded at what she saw.
My glance flashed to S urges an d I perceived him wince to
,

be thus prejudiced in my sister s eyes d iscovered with sword

- ’

in hand against me whose fault it was as Surges had every

, ,

right to decl are .

Colonel Surges said Her Maj
’
esty takin g a step toward s
m
, ,

him expl ain me vyyouare here in y house .

,
’

And he answered her frankly but with perfect respect ,

Please Your Maj esty I came to try an d persuade Mr.

, ,

Tempest to invite his sister to return to his roof. ’

And vy
Because Miss Tempest s residence at B randenburgh House
’

hath laid her open to grievo u s insu lt. ’

V ot in sult ? V ot insult sir haf Annette received under

m
, ,

y roof
3 10 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
But now S urges held his peace. Whereupon the Q ueen
tu rned to me an d as ked :
Shimmy I can trust you. Y ouvas cryin g De Q ueen !
, ,

De Queen F or vy Shimmy i
,
”

Mad am I f,
’
altered perhaps I was m istook . B ut I
,

fancied Colonel S u rges had f ail ed in his respect to — to

De Q ueen she caught e up. m Y ouvas fi ghtin g f or me ,

Shimmy ? I see it ! I see it An d then turn in g her regal

,

head to S urges an d tapping out her sarcas tic bi ting words

m
, ,

on the pal ofher hand with her fan Mein Gott can it be
y oudid come here to trow a stone at a def encele ss v o an in m
her d ay ofsore trial P Y ou vas b rafe Colonel S u
, rges — you
vas ver b raf And now sir vot charge did you hat to
’
e ! , ,

bring against your Queen i "

m
She fi xed hi with her flashing eyes whil st A n nette stole
m
,

to my side an d pressed my ar with a gesture th at distinctly

indicated approval.
I saw S urges moisten his lips an d make an ef fort to reply ,

but his voice failed him .

Confess the Queen commanded hi . Y ou d o not m
leave dis house until youhafcon fessed . ’

He real iz ed that H er Majesty was in gri l iest e arn est m

that he was out-generall ed an d m ust surrender. On e i
, m
l o ri gl an ce he vent u red at Annette only to see b her
p n
g , y
indignant mien that she was against him too .
By God I pitied him ! It was perhaps a f
, , al se p osition
,

he was taken in —a position he had b een drove into by my

hot-headed impulsiveness. I n this p ass he conceived with ,

the stilted punctilio ofthe military that his hono ur dem anded
,

he should back not only his word s but the in terp reta
, ,

tion I had put on them . F or he was one ofthose who wo uld

oon er fi ght on a f al se i ssue than imperil his sel festeem by
-

evading a challenge.
Since Your Maj esty comm ands e I speak he said. m , ,
’

I came here to ask Mr. Tempest to withdraw h is si ste r

rom Yo u r Maj esty s p rotection becau se I was persu ad ed she
’
f
3 12 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO W RON G

summon ed up by this token . An d h l b burst f

a a fso
-
ro m
Annette as ofsome dorm ant feeling pain f
,
ully surprised .
I co uld guess what the token conveyed . It was a Message
from the Past to remi n d Her Maj esty ofa service
a sacrifi ce offered .
And it changed the whole tenour of that stran ge scen e
m
,

an d imported into it a te po rary restraint on H er Maj esty s

’

part that was utter]y foreign to her nature when her an ger
was once arou sed .

Batfled an d u ndecided she stood smoothing out the pretty

green thin g with a halfcaressing to uch an d gaini n g time.
-
,

At l ast a laugh broke f rom her in a spas m . It r e call ed her

to hersel f. With conspicuous care she placed the feather in

the bosom ofher dress fi xin g it as she might a flower. And
,

so with the token p ro u

, dly displayed drew hersel fup with a
,

Q ueenly digni ty an d m ade reply in a low vi b ratin g voice

m m
, ,

which told ofher e otion an d gathered force an d vol u e as

she p roceeded .
—
So Colonel S ges you haf j oined de rank s of m in e
u
m
, r

en emies And do return to me d is token of y este em v ich

I did gif to you ten years ago ! Dat is your re ply to y m
q uestion And d is sir is mine an swer to you She pointed
, ,

to her bosom swelled out with passion whil st her head was
m
, ,

thrown back an d her chin held high

, agn ifi cen t in her
,

attitu de of scorn . And then : And for you an d al l mine

—
oder vile enemies who d o accuse me who do trow at e de m
st one — who do join in d is base con spiracy dat haf for f ifteen ,

years pursued me vid lies an d hate an d malice to do me

m
, , ,
—
wrong God d a n you al l she shouted furio usly an d ,

pl ucked the feather from her bosom an d flung it on the floor

,

with a passionate gesture an d st amped on it an d groun d it

,

beneath her heel .

‘
m
I u d e Qu een o f g
E u le d ! D e Q um
een ca n d o n o w ron
g
" .
 C H APTE R XXI II
THE QUEEN S T RI AL ’

CAME the 17th ofAugust the openin g d ay ofthe Q ueen s

’

T rial an d her unparalleled humiliation .

The capital was deeply stirred an d there was an ominous
,

spi rit apparent in the crowds that m ade their wa to W est

y
min ster. The King s Ministers had taken ani fold precautions
’
m
to keep the public peace. From early in the morning numerous
patrols of the City Light Horse parad ed the Westminster
R oad Parliament Street an d Whi tehal l were watched by
strong detachments of the Surrey Horse Police ; in New Pal ace
Yard two tr00 ps ofLi fe G uard s stood accoutred by their , ,

horses an d several compan ies ofthe Coldstream Guard s were

packed in Westminster Hall wherein overnight an d secretly
, , , ,

a powerf ul train offiel d artillery had been introd uced . S uch

was the retort ofthe Ki n g an d his Min i sters to the low an gry ,

growling ofthe nation .

At eight o clock gro ups of citiz ens began to gather in all
’

the streets leadin g to West minster where a strong wooden

m
,

barrier was erected for the purpose ofk ut the c rowd

m
ee
p g o ,

an d gu arded by a d etach ent of police u nder the immedi ate

orders of the high baili f fofthe city . An hour an d a hal f
later their Lordships were to b e seen arri ving an d as thei r ,

individual carriages were brought to a walk nearing the

precincts ofthe House the occupan ts were assailed or greeted
,

with varyi n g accl am ations according as they were supposed

,

to entertain opinion s for or against Her Majesty .

3 13
3 14 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO W RONG
Ab m
out this time a co pany ofGuards was arched to the m
entrance to the House ofLord s. They were cal led on by
the people to Re membe r their Q ueen Think of their
wives mothers—s isters daughters
— Not to forg et they
were men an d Engli shmen Be worthy to b e F ree M e n

Whil st mingled with these apostrophes were heard some

threatening cries uttered here an d there f
, rom the centre of

the cro wd of Upset the tyrants an d there is double pay for

, ,

y ou B ut conj uration or o bj urg ation bro ught no cha n ge

to thei r impassive di sciplined faces , .

Presently attended by a single groom arrived the D uke

, ,

of Wellington on horseback to be received with coarse an d

,

angry expression s ofdi spleas u re . The which he igno red with

th t notorious calmness an d selfpossession he was m aster of.
a -

Here an d there a hat was raised to him in compliment an d he ,

very politely returned these particular salutations. T h e D uke

of Y o rk al so on horseback f
, ollowed an d was treated little
, ,

better for the nation had never forgiven him his scand al with
,

Mrs. Clarke. But the D uke of Sussex comin g l ater in his ,

chariot was cordi al ]y cheered .

,

An d now al l eyes were strained to catch sight of H er

Maj esty who at ten o clock left her town m an sion a
,
’
—
temporary one taken for the t rial an d next to Lord Castle ,

reagh s ho u se in St .James s Sq u are . Her new State C arri ag e

’ ’

was d rawn by six beau tiful b ay horses an d the se rvants cl ad ,

in royal liveries of scarlet an d gold with purple caps an d ,

facings. Lady Anne H amilton sat by the Q u een s side ; Sir ’

m
Willia Gell Mr. Alderman Wood an d Lord Archibald
, ,

Hamilton preceded her in another carriage ; an d Mr. Keppel

C raven an d my sel frode behind on horseback .
Her Maj esty was d rest al l in black saving f or a rich w h ite
,

veil . She wore a high ruf f with a gipsy hat an d a pl ume of

, ,

o stri ch -feathers. After the fashion ofthe d ay she had dyed

her eyebro ws a d ark colo ur an d wore a bl ack wig w ith a
, ,

pro fusion of curls which overshad owed her cheeks an d gave ,

her an unpl easing sombre appearance. l was e ver a pity that " ‘

,
3 16 THE QUE EN CAN DO NO W R ONG
m m
Den an , now resu ed . It l asted thro u ghout the sitting,
an d al l the time he was speaking , u n til ha l f
-
pas t fo ur l n t he

af tern oon , the Q u een rem ained l n her chair. Thi s was her
procedure through every d ay ofthat long, exhaustin g ord eal .
I have no in ten tion to describe to you this Great State
m
Trial in detail . Y ou ay read it for yourselves, for al l
that took place has been m any times published . It was
spread over a long period , namely, f rom the 17 th of A u u st
g
to the 8 th ofSeptember, when the case f or the prosec u tion
was fi n ished , an d the Trial adjou rn ed u ntil the 3 rd ofOct o b er,

when Mr.Bro u gham open ed his defence, whi ch occupied un til

the 26 th. Af ter that came the reply f or the Cro wn , an d the

debate , with the fi n al vote taken on the l 0th of Nove b m

m
er.

Thus, for twelve week s Her Maj esty was kept in a ore
cruel state ofsuspense an d agitation than has an y parallel in
the State Trial s ofEngland .
m
Ti e or four incidents I will touch upon, fro which youm
m ay gather the manner an d atmosphere ofthe prosecu tion,
which maintained an attitude ofsecrecy an d surprise , with
intention to overwhelm the Queen by withholding fro her m
the names ofthe witnesses to be sprun g upon her, lik e sn akes
darting their ven om f rom co n cealment, an d ne ver see n until

they strike .
When the case against Her Majesty was un f ol d ed it d is

played an accusation so gross so low so obscene in its details

, , ,
’
that to hear it was to be shocked . The King s Attorn ey
gen eral in his opening speech outlined the case against the
, ,

Queen an d then proceed ed to call his witnesses whereofthere

, ,

were twenty -fi ve. An d the fi rst ofthem Teodoro Majoochi.

The Queen s face was n ot directed towards the witnesses
’ ”

bar when thi s f ellow stepped up to it but a moment after

,

wards she tu rned round an d recognised him . The villain had

been a livery servant in her service in Italy one to whom she
,

had shown that kindness a nd conde scension which she e ver

displayed in an extraord inary degree to her servitors an d de
pendents. And to see him d rest like a gentle an an d
, m ,
 THE QUEEN S TRIA L 3 17
’

treated like on e as he was bowed in by the usher smote her ,

like an insult for it discovered the mean an d damnable in

m
,

stru en ts selected to tr an d ef fect her ruin

y .

Her proud spi rit could not brook being arraigned by such
low an d v ulgar carl s as this Maj oochi. H orrifi ed an d in d ig

n ant at the attack premeditated she al lowed an excl amation

,

of di sgu st to escape her lips. To which cal umny an d false

hood immediately attached the words No no ! Teodoro or
, , ,

by way of a more ef f
ective variant Oh oh ! T rad id ore !
, ,

both with equal untruth. Then to show her contempt H er

, ,

Majesty rose from her chai r an d retired from the contamina

,

tion ofa chamber where di scharged groom s an d suborned

m
cha berm aids were to be invited to traduce the character of
the Queen ofEnglan d .
Maj oochi was three days u nder examination an d Mr. ,

Brougham brought the rascal out in his true col ours who , ,

under the crucial test of cross-examination had b ut few ,

replies to advent u re except the phrase Non mi ricordo ( I

,

do not remember l ) which contemptible subte

, he sought
at least a hu ndred times. Indeed he gave a f, as ion to the
phras e which becam e a by-word an d synonym for a lie an d
, ,

band ied contemptuously on the public lips. He retire d ab

m
so

l utel y di scredited as a witness a an I tell you who , ,

deserved to be banged by the neck until he was dead an d ,

then drawn an d qu artered as were Thistl ewood an d the other

,

so- called Cato Street Conspi rators in this very year who ,

were not one tithe as vile conspirators as he

m
Upon this an an d a woman named Loui sa Dumont the
case for the Crown chiefly depended . D umont was a d is
m m
m
charged fe e de cha bre ofthe Q ueen s a snake an d a spy ’
, ,

as she showed by her eviden ce which she deliberately colou

, red

into an attack on Her Majestys honour. But she too

’
, ,

withered under cross-examination an d was compelled to con

,

fess that she had been discharged for tell ing a lie ; how
she had written af ter her discharge in the highest term s of
Her Majesty an d with in fi n ite respect an d implored to be
, ,
3 18 THE QUEEN CAN DO N0 WR ONG
res tored to her post but without success. Subseq uently she
,

had hired her tongue to the Milan Commissioners an d pre , ,

viou s to the tri al resided thi rteen months in E n glan d at the

,

expense ofthe agents for the Bill .

There were only two respectable witnesses for the King ,

both of fi cers in his n avy— Captains P echel l an d Brigg . T he

m
s

ut ost they were able to bear testimony to was the Q ue en s

’

m
condescension to Colonel Berga i in short Scand al about ,

Q ueen Eli z abeth as the saying goes with no more in it than

,
”
,

there was against England s m aiden Q ueen .

’

As f or the garbage which the other witnesses sp awn ed I ,

will not soil my pages by repeating it. There are proba

bil ities an d there are possibilities ; h um an nature is frail an d
human nature is foolish . But there are limitation s an d a
m
,

woman cannot d ivest herselfofher wo an hood an d the stories

'

that these vile creatures told could only be intelligible on the

theory that Her Maj esty was ad . m
So ended the prosecu tion an d after the ad j o urnment of
,

almost a month the case f or the Q u een s defence opened . ’

,

It was on the 3 rd of October that Mr. Brougham ro se to

—
deliver his matchless speech for the Q ueen a speech which
has been described as the greatest ever m ade by an y ad v ocate .
I was privileged to hear it for as Eq uerry to Her M aj
, , esty I ,

had entry to the House behind the b ar to be prese nt when ,

wanted by my Mistress. And as I li sten ed to his peri od s in ,

the full flood ofhis mighty eloquence an d irresistible logic ,

defending thi s wom an who ever desi red to be con sidered a

,

woman before she was a Queen again st the cal umnies of her
,

enemies an d oppressors my thoughts reverted to that scene

m
,

on the b alcony of Connau ght Ho use when Mr. B ro ugha ,

counselled Princess Charlotte an d guided her safe thro ugh a

,

dangerous crisi s.
I have no space here to put down Mr. Brougham s speech ’

in full . It was an oration hi storic classic unexcelled in its

, ,

dom ain an d should be read as a whole . Notwithstanding I

, ,

will q uote a few passages from it because they will give you
,
3 20 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
c nvict the
o of fi —
lowest o en ce scand alous ifbrought forward
'

to su pport a charge of the highest nature which the l aw

—
knows monstro us to ruin the hono ur ofa Bri tish Q ueen !
What shall I say then ifthis is thei r case— if this the
, ,

species of p roo f by which an act ofj u dici al legisla tion ,

ex
postf a cto l aw is so u
, ght to be passed again st a de f enc e l ess

woman
My Lords I pray yo ur Lord ships to pause ( H i t one
m
, s

sank in to that low thu ndero us cad ence I remembere d hi to

,

have employed once before when he warn ed the Prin cess

Charlotte ; an d yet fi l l ed that august chamber in which the
g ene ral silen ce was su ch yo u might h ave h eard the
pa tt er of
a mo u se scam pering acro ss the floor Y ou are standing
upon the brink of a precipice. It will go fo rth as your
j udgment if it goes against the Q ueen . But it will be the
only j udgment youwill ever pronounce which will fail in its
obj ect an d return upon those who gave it
,

Again he paused con scious of the momentous n ature of

,

his prediction . Then flin gin g his gown back with a sudden
m
, ,

sl ash of his ar as thou

, gh he were wielding a sword in
defence ofa great cause he cried in a high -pitched v oice :
,

Save the Country my Lords from the horrors of this

, ,

catastrophe ! Save yourselves f rom this situ ation ! Re scu e

that Country ofwhich youare the orn aments but in which — — ,

— you can flourish —

no longer when you
severed — from — — —
the people than the blossom—when
- — q

it — is — cu t — from -the — root -an d — stem -o f — the

tree
Slowly an d prodigiously he spake d riving those word s ,

home with hammer strokes each sharp isolated in cisive , , , ,

convincing. Then once more to his subtle pleading with its ,

f aint vei n offlattery its prof , oun d und ercurrent ofwarn in g his ,

voice falling into an awed whi sper as he referred to the Crown ,

an d rising to a t ru mpet-note as he predicted its destruction .

Save the Country that you ay continue to ad orn it !
, m
—
Save the Crown which is in jeopardy; the aristocracy which ,
 THE QUEEN S TR IAL 321
‘

is h ken ; the Altar which can n ever more stand secure

m
s a ,

a idst the shock s that shall rend its kind red throne !

Y u
o h ave sai d my Lo rd s— ou have willed — the Ch u rch
, y
has wil l e —
d an d the King has wi l led that the Queen sh ould
be deprived ofits solemn service. She has indeed instead , ,

ofthat service the heartf elt prayers of T H E P E OPL E — he

fl ung the word at their Lordships as a an might fling a m
m
bomb that ust immolate them did it explode ; an d then ,

consciou s ofthe f ascination with which he held th at ill ustrious

assembly attu
, ned his voice to supplication, an d with his eyes
fi xed on Heaven cried
She wa nts no prayers ofmine ! But I do here pour forth
m supplic ation at the Throne of Mercy that that Mercy

m y
ay be pou red d own u pon the People in a larger measure
m
than the merits of its R ulers ay deserve an d that your
m
,
—
hearts ay be turned to J USTI CE

m
The witn es on behalfofthe Q ueen were as respectable
as those against her were di srep u table . Amongst them
Mr. St. Led ger Lord Glenbervie Lady Charlotte Lindsay
, , ,

Sir William Gell Mon sieur Sicard D r. Holl and ( af

, , terwards
the famous physician) the Hon . Mr. Keppel Craven Lieu
, ,

tenant Hown am an d Lieutenant Flinn . My sister An n ette

was to h ave given evidence b ut after the bru
, tal way in which
L ad y Charlotte Lindsay was c oss exam in ed by the Cou
r - n sel

for the Crown her p riv ate pecu

, ni ary mi sfortunes raked up ,

an d herself compelled to shed tears who was as good an d ,

gentle a lad y as ever married a spendthri ft husband an d suf ’

,

fared from his extravagance — after seeing thi s treatment Her ,

Majesty declined to allow an y ofher ladies to be subj ected

to simil ar legal torture . So neither Lady Anne Hamilton
n or Annette was u t fo w d The which w g e t d i
m
r ar a a r a sa
p . s p
pointment to y sister who in formed me in private that
,

it had been her determination to give their Lordships an d the ,

King s Solicitor-general in particular a touch ofthe Tempest

’

m
,

te per. And f , aith ! I think she had it in her to do so l

21
 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
Poor JackFl in n my old messmate who was e v er a fool
, , ,

but as gallant a one as youmight fi n d on a quarterd e ck stil l ,

a f ool f rom tru ck to keel did make a sad exhibition of him

,

sel f an d ( only that ever one cou ld see he su ffe ed f m

m
, y r r o a
natural b ulness an d in distinctn ess of mind)
as hf ust have
iven the Q ueen s cau e shre wd blo w. T he tru th s he
’

g s a w a
was su ch a cursed fool so nervous in public an d with a
m
, ,

emory that ( in such a tryin g situation as he was ex posed to

when givin g e viden ce before the assembled Peers ofthe Kin g
dom ) held facts only as long as a sieve holds water ; where
f ore he wrote out a paper from which to refresh his memory
un der examination . But when he came to consult th is paper ,

b e han ed ifhe cou

g l d re ad his ow n writin
g ! In this
pass

Count Schiavin i a very agreeable Ital ian noblem an en ter

,

tain ed in the Q u een s service to secure the attendan ce of her

’

witn e good n atured l y of

ess ,s - fered to write the memoran du m
ou t in a legible hand . This he d id an d when Jackgot into ,

the witness-box he was seen refreshing his memory from it

as of ten an d copio u sly as a Maste r s m ate will swig ru !
’
m
Whereupon the King s Solicitor-general Sir J Co pley ( the
’
,

same who had so shamef ully b ullied Lad y Charlotte Lin d say)
m
,

got hold ofthe paper an d began cro ss-exa ining poo r Jack
m
,

U pon its con tents. Jack who was a ship withou t its co pass
m
,

or ru dder when his memorandum was gotten away from hi

m
,

was took al l aback thrown on his bea

, end s pooped an d , ,

fi n al l y foundered For he went of f in a dead f aint there at

m
.

the b ar ! Well they only gave the poor devil f

,
ive inutes
to recover an d then had him up again al l daz e d an d he
m
, , ,

got boggled an d swore he himsel f had w ritten the emoran

m
,

d u in the Mediterranean Sea ! An d then the Solicitor

general as ked him suddenly Was he sure Count Schiavin i
u
,

had not wrote it ( God only knew how he s s pected w ho

was the real w ri ter l) an d poor Jackhad to con f

, ess it was
so an d m ade him sel f ou
, t a pu blic liar an d no need for it , ,

because the particular evidence he was giving was m erely a

test ofhis memory an d nothing really to do for or again st
,
3 24 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O NG
u wo uld ather be JackFl inn than Sir John C opl ey. T was
‘

yo r

ou had their sympathy, Jack an d he thei r contempt,

y ,

that could resort to such a cowardly trick . But then it is

ever the way with your lawyers ; in the m atter of b usin ess
chival ry en ters not i n to their composition . ’

Have I not lost you r respect Ji my he as ked with

, m ,

a choke in his voi ce.

, m
Why an could it have been done without contempt of
,

Court I would have been by your side when yougot bogg led.
,

And told the noble Peers my opin ion about how Jas kFl inn
f ought for his Country at Trafalgar whilst they were gamb
l ing an d drin king
H e was greatly overcome at thi s f or if ever there was an ,

honest Jackit was this honest fool Fl inn .

Hearin g you say that said he I don t think I l l sh oot
,
’
,
’ ’

mysel fto -n ight

Have a b ottle of wine instead I suggested ; an d takin g ’

m
, ,

him by the ar l ugged him to the Kin g s H ead tavern ’

m
, ,

where I was sometimes accusto ed to resort for a bite of

nuncheon . A very decent place with partitions in it with
,

doors to them so that you co uld be quite private in your

,

box . M uch resorted to by Members of Parl iament when

they wi shed to confer with an y ofthei r constituents who had
come u to London to see them on politi cal b u i e
p s n ss .

I engaged one of these private boxes called for a bottle of ,

win e with a pi pe oftobacco f

, or Fl inn who was a great ,

smoker an d sat down

, t o cheer him u p a little . The which
was easy d on e af t er a glass or two as I knew f or thi s was not
, ,

the fi rst time I had gotte n him out ofhis low spi rits who
m ,

had b een a elancholy wreck this last month out ofa nervous
app rehen ion
s ofgoing into the witness box—an ordeal that
-

he dread ed far more than he would have done going into

a gen eral action on board a sin kin g ship in a h u rricane !
As he was lighting his pi pe an d our conversation sus
m
,

pended for a oment I chanced to catch a voice sayi n g

,

Hell s truth ! What have we here i

’ ”
 THE QU EEN S TRIAL
‘
325

A voice that was familiar to me an d somehow suggested a

,

sensation of f ear without my being able to expl ain to myself

,

why—a voice I could not put an owner to for the moment. It

issued from an ad joining box an d was in the n ature ofa
m
,

startled excl amation m u ch louder than the l ow hu ofcon

versation therein .
I held my fi n ger up to Flinn to enforce silence an d nodded
m
,

y head war ni n gly in the d ir

e ction of our neighbo ur s. Then

something impelled me to ri se u an d stand on the bench of

p
ou r box an d l i sten with my ear to the top of the wo oden
,

partition .
T here were three or f our persons in the next box an d
m
,

I caught the word Milan entioned ; an d then someone

s oke in Itali an an d again the voice was f amili ar to me an d
p , ,

yet I could not put an o wner to that either !

And trying to cudgel my brains as I stood poised there
m m
, ,

heard the words Re stel l i ust go for he is the only an for

, ,
’
this j ob.
Something quickened my mem ory. Inspiration flashed on
it. I recognised my men .
The Italian was Restel l i one ofthe foulest witn esses again st
'

the Queen who had given evidence some wee ks back for the
,

agents ofthe Bill .

—
And the other as Dr. Pasco !
w
m
Only the an who answered him back addressed him as
D r. V al py
Pasco was the no torious an d mysterious Spy M ter !
- as
 C H A P TE R X X I V
MASTER
T HE SPY-

THE N be sure I pricked my ears an d kept my station on

, , ,

the bench to hear what conversation passed between these

m
enemies of y Q ueen .
Soon in breathless interest for that which I heard was a
,

matter ofhigh politics.

—
There were four persons plotting Pasoo ; a police ag ent ;
Restell i the Italian witness ; an d an interpreter w ho trans
, ,

l ated what the latter said .

Pasco was speakin g fast an d low but f , rom my coign of
vantage with my ear held close to the top of the partition
, ,

that acted as a sort ofsounding-board his words ascended ,

clear. He did a tale unfold . There was an important

despatch to be sent to Milan to the agents of the B ill there ,

f rom whom some in f ormation was urgently req ueste d an d ,

other work to be done. Some of the Queen s Italian wit ’

nesses who had not yet lef

, t thei r co untry were to be hindered
,

f rom doing so at an y cost with a whi spered su

, ggesti on that
their coachmen should be tampered with an d their carriages ,

overturn ed presumably by accident whil st they were out

m
, ,

driving so that their inj uries might prevent the fro m

,

m aking the journey . This foul invention was Pasco s own ; ’

f ou m ust u nderstand the Q u e en s I tali an witnesses were

’
or
y
al l peopl e of respectability an d station who co u ld n ot be
m
,

bri bed or inti idated from attending an d to hinder their

m
,

free action was a task ofno ordin ary diplo acy .

3 26 l
328 T H E QUE EN CAN DO NO WR ONG
He had awhole batta lion of spies un der his ord ers : at
Dover when Her Majesty landed ; at Canterbury where she
, ,

passed the night at the Foun tain Hote l ; at South Aud ley
Street when she resided in Mr. Alder an Wood s house ; at
, m ’

Bran den burgh House when she removed thither. By God !

,

I tell youthe old dog-fox had his secret spies there at this very
m
hour I a writing about ! One of who had d isclosed the m
fact that Co u nt Schiavin i had wrote the emoran d u for m m
Fli n n ! Aye an d worse than that com un i cated the con ten ts
, , m
ofone of Mr. Brou gham 8 letters to Her Maj esty who was
’

m
,

onstrous careless l n the way she tossed her correspond en ce

down . I tell you that old devil Pasco knew everythin g so ,

far as it co u ld be gathered by trickery intrigue an d whole , ,

sale corru ption .

And here he was talking in his box littl e suspecting the
, ,

Spy-Master was being spied upon himsel f! The m atter in

hand was very urgent. He desired Restel l i to start there an d
then by a ship that l ay in the Pool below Lo ndon Bridge for
the Continen t. Against this the Italian urged that he had
n ot got his money in f ull yet an d suppose he lost his balan ce
,
”
by leavin g England i
At the which Pasco assured him through the in terpreter
m
, ,

he him selfwould make it good to hi three times over ii ‘ ’

he succeeded l n thi s j ob n ow proposed ; but under no circum

stances sho u ld he be a loser. And with that we heard the
chink ofgold which was evidently a convincin g an swer to
,

the I talian s obj ection s

’

Well what was I to d o who had smoked this v illainous

, ,

plot ? To raise an o utcry an d stop R estel l i ? To deno unce

m
Pasco ? To l ay y brig alongside this fleet of pirates an d
open battle ? Or to haul my wind an d then out boats an d
m
,

follow with uflied oars as they dri fted on thei r course ?

I considered ofit. As for the witnesses that were to be
prevented f rom coming to Engl an d they co u ld be warne d of

m
,

this foul trick premeditated . And Restell i— why n ot let hi

g o, an d then on some pl au
, sible excuse de and hi to
g i
,ve m m
 THE SPY-MASTER 3 29

urther evidence
f m
in cross-exa ination ? And when the King s ’

side co u m
ld not prod uce hi why there was I a witness for
, , ,

the Q ueen able to ex plain where an d when an d why he had

,

gone an d expose the whole plot ! Such was the scheme that
,

occurred to me an d my heart l aughed to think how this

,

ac cidental conversation overheard might b e tu rned to H er

Majesty s m ani fest an d vast ad vantage by so skilful an ad vo
’

cate as Mr. Brougham .

An d Pasco ? Come what might I m ust set fi re to that old
m m
,

dog-fox s tail an d set hi adrift in the enemy s oo l an d s

’
,
’
,

an d d i scred it him . Thi s was my d u ty though it had de

m
,

lighted me more to giv e hi a good thrashing. F or my

spleen an d set m alice against him were now su ch that no
gray hai rs an d no compassion could come between me an d
j ust revenge. And since we last parted I had learnt that a
m an who retu rned f rom tran sportation was li able to b e

app rehended an d sent ou t again to Botany Bay.

m
My mind was ade up. To let Kestelli get him safely
gon e an d then to deal with Pasco as occasion warranted or
,

circumstance permitted . And scarce come to this deci sion

than there was a moving in the adj oining box the reckoning
m
,

called for an d the four occupants ca e out an d hailed a

,

hackney coach .
All this time Flinn had been perched on the bench by my
side withou t speakin g a word . Only when he heard Dr.V al py ‘ ’

sn iggering an d l au ghing at that fi n e fellow Flinn s d isco ’

m
fi tu re (b P sco s di sco very that Cou n chiavin i had wrote
’
t S
m
y a
the memorandum Flinn swore to as his) Jackgave my ar a ,

squ eez e to show he was alert .

And when they lef t their box L et me get ou t he whis
’

m m
, ,

pered . I going to kill that an .

’ ’

Don t be a sen seless fool I told him . Leave this j ob to

’

me. There is more in it than your owl s eyes can see. Y ou

’

m ay accompany me b ut only on your parole not to shove

m
, ,

your oar .
Bu t he is the vill ain who
33 0 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
No arguing ! I d iscovered him an d he is y righ tful , m
quarry . Youve bungled one thing to -day ; I can n ot have
’

you bu ngle thi s. See the ir coach has come . Y ou

,
ay m
accompan y me if oucon f orm to my orders, bu t n ot other
y
’
w18e.
I will conform said he very humbl e. Only
’
, ,

Y oum u
’
st not speak a wo rd .

I m ust be there for to see hi haul down his f l ag . m ’

Y oushall be there an d perhaps help with a broad side at

m
,
—
the fi n ish. But I a Captain this cruise min d that
‘
Aye y ir he assented di sconten tedly b
a e ,s , ,
’
u t sa r-
ilo l ike . ,

A hackney coach is no flyin g frigate at the best of times ,

an d the one Pasco an d Restel l i entered ( the inte rp reter an d

police agent leaving them) had a j ury -horse in the shafts to ,

j udge by its pace . There was no need for Jack an d I to

charter another coach for the pursuit for we kept up with ,

ou r chase with no great ef fort till it turned down by the

Adelphi steps that lead to the stairs. H ere Pasco di scharged
the dri ver an d hailed a wherry an d after so e littl e bargain m
m
,

ing with the boatman he an d the Italian seated the se lves

,

an d started do wn the river.

Flinn an d I had withdrawn into the shadow of a porch

so as not to be seen . We n ow hu rried do wn to the stairs an d
m
,

I asked a b oatman what bargain the fare had ade who had
j ust p ushed of f; an d learnt it was to be rowed to a ship in
the Pool below London Bri dge an d one of the back to , m
Westminster.
It was clear the Spy -Master was going back to the enclosed
m
ca p after he had shipped Restell i of f . My fi rst thought
was to f ollow him but my second suggested a better idea.
m
,

Would youlike to earn a guinea my an i I ask ed one of ,

”

the boatmen drawing him to one side .

,

Twould suit me am az ing well master he decl ared .

’ ’

m
, ,

Y oucan do so at n o ri sque to you rsel fifyouwill an age ,

a little j ob for me .
’

m
And what ight that be master i ,
”
33 2 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
can not f ail to do the Q u een s cause good to sho w the base ’

q uality ofthe instruments used by the Mil an Com mission . ’

Flinn rubbed his han ds mightily delighte d to think that ,

his score again st Pasco would be paid of fso fi n e.

Which remind s me said I that close by here in C ovent ’

m
, , ,

Garden was the place where the irror-mak er l ived whose

, ,

kidnapping was the cause of Pasco being tran sported I .

forg et the man s name but I bel ie ve I can fin d my way to his

’

shop . I have a mind to n d see ifhe is still in the l an d of

m
g o a
the living . It is possible he ight b e a useful witn ess again st
Pasco . ’

No sooner thought ofthan acted upon an d to Tavistock ,

Street where I f o und the shop an d the n ame He witt above it

, ,

that instantly brought the whole thing to my recollection.

And sure the wom an who received us reminded me in a way
, , ,

ofthe one who had come to the Sel ect Co f fee House to get rid
ofher hu sband an d I opened the doo r to her.
,
But she was
no longer b uxom being a poor le n looking creat ure who
a -
, , ,

might have been beate n every d ay ofher life since I last saw
her the which when I came to reckon it up was eighteen
, , ,

years ago
I s Mr. Hewitt in P I asked her.
’

Y es sir she said very timid in her speech . Bu t he is at

’ ‘
, , ,

his supper an d does not like to be di stu rbed .

’
,

The same Mr.He witt that was kidnapped at the Select

Coflee Ho u
’

se by a an call ed D r. Pasco m
Upon hearing that she gave a frightened cry an d asked me ,

for God s sake not to men tion the c ircu mstan ce. But the
’

noise she made bro ught her husband into the shop an d at the
m
,

mere sight ofhi she cowered behind the counter l ike an

overwhipped dog.
What s your business i asked Mr. Hewitt who see ed no
’ ”
m
m
,

older as I reme bered him an d as tough a bit offlesh as you

, ,

co uld see with his wrinkled face an d iron gray hair.

-

m
,

I asked him if he was the an who was kidn apped by

Dr. Pasco in 1802 an d got hi transporte d f or it.
, m
 T HE SP Y -MASTER 3 33

Why yes I amsaid h

, , that s the woman what got
,
’
e,
‘
an d
’

me trepanned an d is sorry for it now hey

, And he snarled ,

at his miserable wi f e an d showed his yellow fan gs.

,

Mine has been a li fe ofsorrow she answered . ,

’

I ve took good care ofthat he growled . Why for have

’

,
’

oucome here gentlemen

y ,

I told him that Pasco was like to be charged with an

off ence to-morro w an d I wanted him to attend an d identi f
, y
the villain as the on e who had been tran sported .
Why yes I an d my wi fe will do that . She ll be glad to ’

m
, ,

se e hi again . What vill ainy has he been u p to

He s Spy-Mas ter ofthe Cro wn Witnesses in thi s proseou
‘

tion again st H er Majesty— God save her

Bu t I a King s
’
m an
‘
m
he obj ected . I have the repairs,
’

of the l u stres at Carlton Ho u se . I ll not testify again st ’

the King s Spy Master. Not me And lose my patron age

’
-
’ ’
m
There s a contract I expecting for the Pavilion at Brighton
u n
’
—
I wo ld t l ose that no not for twenty Pascos to be re ,

venged on N0 when I wan ts to work my spite of

,
f I ve ,
’

got my wife handy . Y oum ust get somebody else to identify

m
your an ifhe s a King s servant. ’ ’ ’

And have you no sympathy for the Q ueen 1 I asked ”

him .
Sympathy for a woman he exclaimed . They re al l of ’

m
the b ad — same as thi s n u And with that l ugged hold of
his poor trembling wif e by the ear an d forced her into the ,

middle of the shop to di splay her an d then thru st her

ru dely through the door at the back .

That conduct did strike me as ost unmanly an d reprehen m
sible not to
, m
ention his insult to the Q ueen .
Y ourogu e I cried is that how youtreat a wom an an d
, ,

speak ofH er Maje sty ? Y oum u st be tau ght better m an n ers ,

so I ll teach em to you And with that catched him by his

’ ’ ’

m
.

nose which was a good long on e an d gave hi a proper

, ,

clouting to teach him civility an d respect to the sex until his ,

wife came out an d begged me to desist.

33 4 T HE QUEEN C AN DO NO WR ON G
I ll have the l aw ofyou he cried as soon as he w as f
‘
,
’

, ree

ofme an d m ade an attempt to ge t into the stree t .

,
Which
compelled me to stretch him on the floor with suf ficient
f m
orce to keep hi there till Flinn an d I ef ected our retire
f
ment.
I do not know why it was but the sight of that poor
,

wretch ofa woman raised a c uriosity in me to visit the street

in the Savoy where the Sel ect Cof fee House was sit uated ,

which I had never on ce experienced the desire to re visit in al l

these years. It was but fi ve min utes walk away an d almost
’
,

on our road to the Adelphi so we took it in our re turn .

,

Not a bit chan ged ! And as I stood in the stree t an d

looked up at the led ge ofthe roo fsilhouetted agai n st the
darkening sky there crept over me something of the horror
m
,

ofmy situ ation that d ay offlight when Pasco he l d

, e o ver

it to peep down at the mob be l ow with only his greasy grasp

,

between me an d death ! I do think it revived my personal

detestation again st that cruel an d cowardly scoundrel an d ,

determined me to give him no quarter beg he never so hard , ,

ifhe f ell into my hands this night.

It was still too early to go back to the Adelphi stairs an d ,

having nothing better to do Flinn an d I strolled up the

,

Strand in the direction of Temple Bar. It chanced to b e

very cro wded on this particular evening. F or this reas on .that
d uring the last t wo days certain seditious placards had been
mysteriously posted up an d handbills secretly d istributed by
,

sympathiz ers ofthe Q u een an d their contents had brou ght

m
m
,

the Metropoli s into a very in fla abl e state.

In order to come at the authors an d distributors of these
treasonable documents Lord Sidmo uth the Secre tary ofState
, ,

for the Home Department had fi l l ed the streets with secret

,

police agents an d patrols in plain clothes to move about ,

the crowds an d li sten to what was being remarked upon . Ou

that very morning there had been an application m ade to
Mr. Birnie one ofthe m agistrates at Bow Street f or a warrant

m
, ,

for the arrest ofone Willia Franklin who was supposed to ,

33 6 T HE Q UEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G

d Queen B ess an d the g loriou

mm m m
g oo s
S o e a ong st the ost re orseless
mm ig ht b m
in d that there as an sap rese A ct o f
m
en e ies

m
ear in

P arlia en t which ak es it en al to u ion the fi h f h

m p q es t g t o t e

n ation to l i it the su ccession to the thron e . Whil st the

a syste mh mu t at st shortly re en erate
g this en sla ved lan d
u the tyran t whil e it ren d s the husb
m
an d cr sh chain , the an d
is playin g the D an d y. N ero fi d d led when Ro e was

m
I have n ot l ugged this atter in j ust to fi l l my page but ,

for a very particu lar reason as youshall presently see . And

,

so back to my sto ry an d the Adelphi stairs where we arrived

m
,

to fi n d our an j ust abo ut to put out to cruise in the clear

way to intercept P asoo s wherry . It was dark n ow b ut a fin e
’

m
,

clear night ofit with enou , gh moon to ake things recog

n isab l e at no great distance. All the other boatmen had
m ade their wherries fast an d gone of fhome leaving the stai rs ,

deserted .
F or hal fan hou r we wai te d there specu l atin g wh ether
,

Pasco might not have put ashore at London Bridge stairs or ,

ou r boatman mi ssed his whe rry an d so we sho uld lose the rogue
m
, ,

an d the best chance to deal with hi . F or he was too sl a

y
dog fox to adventure publicly an d of
- ten f
rom his l air in the en
closed camp where he had the charge ofthe King s witn esses.
,
’

However our minds were presently set at rest when we heard

,

the sound ofoars in the rowl ocks an d two wherri es l oomed

m
,

through the darkness aking for the stai rs.

They reached them an d Pasco stepped out an d proceeded
m
,

to pay his an an d ded uct a shilling from his fare for b reach
m m
,

ofagree ent an d to cu rse hi ro undly for not carryi n g out

m
,

his bargain to deliver him at Westmin ster. In the id dl e of

which j obation the an went of m
f an xious to
g et, ho e to m
his wif e.
We had withdrawn a little f rom the stairs b ut as soon as , ,
 THE SPY -MASTER 33 7

we saw the coast clear m ade for Pasco . Whom I clapped on

,

the sho ulder an d saluted as gruf

, fas I could
D r. V al py ali as Dr. Pl uto alias D r. Pasco I apprehend
, , ,

ouin the King s name f or retu

’
rning f om t ran sportation .
’

y r
And who the devil are youi he dem anded very haughty”
,

in his m an ner f or he had not recogni sed me in the dark an d

m
, ,

he was a an with great back -stairs in fluen ce.

m
I a Little White Rabbit said I . Little White
,
’

Rabbit.
’

Little Wh ite Rabbit he gasped all scared by the sudden ,

ness of the revelation . But b ut—Mr. Tempest sir we , ,

settled ou r di f
ferences long ago
m
That ay be your opinion but it is not mine said I . , ,
”

And unless youcan show me your Free Emancipation ticket

f rom Botany Bay it is my intention to have ou ship ped
, y
back there
Back to Botany Bay he exclaimed an d reeled against ,

the wall . How did youfi n d out i ”

Y ouare not the only Spy in the Kingdom .

’

—
Spy ah Do your worst he burst out with a sudden
m
,

spu rt of spi rit . I a not without friends. And I know

ou Jimmy Rabbit — ouan d yo ur treason able doings
y , y
And do you kno w me demanded JackFlinn stepping ,

f orwards.
Y ou
"
Eh ? Whom have we here i
m
I a Lieutenant Flinn an d I ve got a mind to thro w you
,
’

into the river. ’

F or why Mr. Flinn f

, or why ? I never harmed you
,

Y ouknow f or why . Didn t I ove rhear what oucon f essed

’

y
in your box at the Kin g s H ead three hours b’
ack P
’

H earing thi s Pasco gave an uncommon choke ofconsterna

m
,

tion for it revealed to hi that we knew about his dealings

,

with Restel l i. Twas like Jack Flinn an d I gave him a

’

m
,

punch in the ribs which took some ofthe breath out ofhi
an d brou m
ght hi to a proper sense of his situation an d ,
,

conform able to orders again.

33 8 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG

An dnow come youalong with me said I to Pasco .

, ,
”

Where to i ”

To Bow Street where I intend to charge you

,
’
.

An d suppose I ref use to go i ”

Why then Flinn an d I will give you a li ft . A t which

, ,
’

hint Jack slipped his hand under Pasco s knee as tho ugh to ’

u t it into exec ution whil st the bo atm an gave a gru ffl augh .
p ,

H e gro und his teeth an d submitted an d with on e of us

m
, ,

on either side ofhim climbed the steps that l ed to Ada

,

Street an d so into the Strand .

Do youremember the d ay you fled from the Select Cof fee
Ho use an d took me with you I as ked him .
He shrugged his sho ulders very su lky . ,

An d you held me ove r the edge of the roo f w ith yo ur ,

r asy hand cl u tching my w ri st an d b ade me look down and

g e ,

reconnoitre f or ou an d threatened to d rop me down

y ,

I wish I had d ropped you he snarled with a curse . ,

’
,

No do ubt you do . I have j ust been to see the house

again ; the fi rst time since you an d I lef t it together. An d
the l edge of the roof over which you suspended e with m
,

nothing but your treacherous holt between me an d certain

death . And now tis I who a holding you over a di z z y
’
m
precipice restrained from fal l ing on l y by my hand . And I
m
,

a — —
going to d rop you down down do wn until youfetch ,

up at Botany Bay
‘
Hell s curse on you he said . I wish I had killed you
’
,

as you r u ncle paid me to do ! This is my reward for my

humanity
I laughed in his face .
Y ouwas mighty hum ane to the Little White Rabbit
Hell s curse on you he repeated in a voice ofuncommon
’

sincerity ; its hottest corner f or ou

y
There s no one wil l robyouofthat put in Flinn .
’ ’

m m
,

An d y leg that youbroke I reminded him . H ow a

’

mm
,

I to get even with youfor that I And gripped his ar y

”

hardest till he cried for mercy. Y ouhad no m ercy on me !

340 THE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
who is Equerry to the Q ueen an d an Iri sh mal conte nt. In
,

the King s name I call upon youto arrest them

’

Here were the tables turned with a vengeance ! F or the

—
patrol he addre ssed there were three of them in company
s
-immed i ately stepped f orward to sei z e Fl inn an d me .
Hands of f I cri ed . m
I a a Member ofParlia en t an d m ,

this rogue whom youknow as D r. V al py the Spy -Master is

, , ,

n one other than Pasco a crimp who was tran spo rted to
, ,

Botany Bay an d is returned without an Em ancipation ticket.

m m
,

And I a now taking him to Bow Street to charge hi . ’

H e lies cried Pasco p utting on a bold f

, ront . T is an
excuse ofhis to try an d escape capture ! Th ese are the very
rascal s who have been se tting u p the sed itio us pl acards.

Apprehend them in the King s name ’

Two of the patrols made a move forward when Fl inn let ,

ou t right an d lef t an d sent them staggering in fi n e style an d

m
, ,

with an case that m ade me none too anxious to fi ght hi

to a f ini sh . Seeing his hope wrecked Pasco m ade a d art ,

to escape ; but I snapped out my hand at him an d caught

m m
,

hi j ust in ti e . Whereupon the mob at once recogni sed

how the l and l ay an d that Pasco was a King s
, an an d
’
m ,

closed threateningly round him an d the patrol s who blew

, ,

their whistles to bring help from Bow Street .

In which emergency Flinn lifted up his voi ce that co uld ,

b ellow louder than a h urricane an d roared ,

Who s for the Queen ? God save the Q ueen ! Ra lly

’

rally rally f
, or the Q u een
Thi s instantly brought an increase to the crowd around us ,

with men running up from al l sides responsive to the cry an d ,

echoing The Q ueen

, The Q ueen God save the Q ueen
By this time the p atrols were on again an d d rew their ,

staves an d began l ayi n g abo u

, t them particularly at Fl inn
,

an d me . B u t J ackward ed of f thei r blows an d cried at the ,

top ofhis voice

T is D r. Val py we have catched ! Th ey are tryi n g to
’

rescu —
e him . The notorious Dr. V al py the King s Spy
‘

’
 THE SP Y -
MASTER 3 41

Master ! T he villain who has gotten together the lying

evidence against our innocent Queen a s —
Th t him the old ’

ur ! Who s f or a lock of the old f

’
fox with the white f ox s
’

ur P An d with that an d a whi sk ofhis hand whipped ofi

'

f
”

, ,

Pasco s wig an d rendered him a di stinct o b

fl

,
ject for the mob ,

who closed in an d grabbed him as he attempted to wriggle

from my gras p an d by his gu ilty an d al ar ed struggles
,
m
confessed him sel fthe party all uded to.
H e tossed his arms up like a drowning an sinking in a m
heavy sea an d gave a pl unge an d dive to try an d burrow
,

under the living wave of angry f aces that su rrou nded hi . m

I loosed my hold for here was hell set loose after him an d as
, , ,

he broke from me caught a glimpse ofhis features agoni z ed

m
, , ,

an d with the sweat pou ring f ro them .

T he patrols m ade an attempt to rescu e hi for he was a m
m m
,

an ofgreat acco u nt over the ; but Flinn whose blood

m
,

was now boiling began l aying abo u t him strikin g the on

, ,

thei r heads so that they were forced to look to their own

m
,

safety who n ow had a portion of the mob down on the as

,

well . An d Flinn roaring at the top ofhis voice F or the ,

Queen ! Scour your streets of the vermin ! Down wi th al l

tyrants ! Never let the Spy -Master escape
The ef fect was instantaneous. Before you co uld cred it it
the fury o fthe mob was directed against Pasco .
Jack I cried an d l u n ging ou t hooked him by the tail of
’

m
, ,

his coat an d d ragged him back . Y ouare rai sing red urder !
,

Silence. you scare brained fool ! Do not set spark to the

-

tinder of the public temper. There will be m urder done.

Hold your rioting Iri sh tongue ! See ! See ! it is too late !
They ve got him hoisted an d yo ure his m urderer
’
,
’

F or su ddenly Pasco was pitched aloft on the sho ulders of

the crowd wildly appealing with clasped hands for mercy
m
, ,

as they carried him al ong stri k ing at hi with their f ists an d

m
,

stick s spitting at him in their ad inordinate rage an d c rying :

m
, , ,

D rown him the rat ! Drown h ,

i the Spy M aster
-
,

Then I realiz ed it was murder let l oose .

3 42 THE Q U EEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
To the River ! To the Bridge Pitch him over D uck
him ! Duck him ! The damned Spy-Master ! The Q ueen s ’

accu ser ! To the R iver with the King s rat To the R iver
’

Fool I cried to F linn youve done it

,
’
And n ow help
me to save him from thi s mob . ’

We m ad e a pl unge into the crowd to catch up th ose who

carried Pasco ; we struggled fought plun ged butted ; we
, , ,

tore our way forward s striving but in vain to overta ke the

m
, , ,

doom ed wretch who was by this ti e twenty yards ahead of

,

n a carried along like a straw u

, pon a swi ft swirling stream .,

B ut better a torrent of burning l ava than thi s to rrent of

blood thi rsting h um anity !
-

F or the blo od of the citiz ens of London was ro u sed .

They who had been dragooned with the King s military in ’

thei r own streets an d awed with the King s artillery set up ’

m
,

in thei r holy places. They who for these four onth s past
had been go verned with the daily sight of n aked steel ,

because they were for the Q ueen . They whose passions had
been aro used this very night by the seditious placard s calling ,

on them to support the innocent again st the guilty . It was

thi s mob which had the King s Spy -Master within its grasp
’

m
,

an d — God he] e had to su f

f or the King s cau
rf
’

p h i h
- e se .

Fate an d his own folly an d Jack Flinn s h urricane l un gs had

’

m
cast hi for the part ofJonab
The patrols had long since been swept away an d under foot .
T wo of them I heard the next d ay had several of thei r
, ,

bones b roke . There came no help from Bow Street . It

was a time when the exhi b ition of rein forcements might
m ean civil war. The mob had it al l thei r own way an d ,

m ade for the new W aterloo B ridge built three years be fore
m
, ,

in a co pact flood carrying Pasco shoul d er high an d

m
, ,

screaming : Death to the King s Spy -Master ! N on ’

i
ricord o ! Death to the King s Spy -M as ter ! To the B ridge !
’

The Rat to the R i ver D ro wn him ! Drown him

T ry how we wo u ld an d did Flinn an d I ne ve r reached
,

within six yards of him . All we could do was to all ow our

 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
grasp ; there was a slip a jerking forward of the expectant
,

heads ofthe mob an d three feet in f ront ofmy eyes Pasco s

’

, , ,

hold loosed an d he fell back with one agoniz ed shriek into

,

the dark gu l fbe l ow

Followed a silen ce stil l as death a spl ash ofa h eavy body
in water ; an d then a wild fi erce exultant huz z a.
, ,

It was al l over.
And for the f irst time in my life I pitied Pasco an d
m
,

conscious]y the of horror were d ow n y

cheek .
 CHAPTER XXV

‘
I N SP I TE OF T HEM AL L

I HAV E seldom been so powerfully shocked as I was by the

m
tragic despatch ofPasco . The an had been the evil genius
ofmy li f e ; but when he assisted me ( al beit to save his own
skin ) to recover my inheritan ce I wiped of f the slate of my
m
,

m emory the Debit in Account that stood against hi . I

would to God my connection with him had ended there an d ,

I been spared the ghastly an d horrible spectacle of the

despai ring wretch struggling for his life on the parapet of

m
Waterloo Bridge an d that last l ook ofhis eyes as he met
,

ine which m ust abide with me till my death . B ut had I

,

to go through it al l again it would be gone through ; for

,

Pasco was a deadly enemy to my Queen an d for that reason,

I could never forgive him even in his grave.

,

I returned home with JackFlinn who was now blubbering

,

like an y babe an d it was as m uch as Winsome an d I could

,

do to settle him back in anything like conceit ofhim self.

m
At length we persuaded hi that the tragedy was in the
nature ofa Di spensation ofProvidence an d likewi se an acci
,

dent ; an d this con flictin g explanation especially the former

,

af t ofit was most com f orting to Jack who wound up with

I
, ,

pious an d sympathetic h 0pe expressed that Pasco had not

catched cold in his head from being deprived ofhis wig in
the bleak night air which was a most un wholesome thing to
m
,

happen to a heated an Bu t then I told youFlinn was

, ,

ever a fool .
3 46 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
We gave him a room for the night because I was deter
m
,

mined he should accompany me early the next o rning to

call on Mr. Bro ugham . This he did but not into the roo m
m
,

where I had ycon ference with the Q ueen s Advocate -general ’

,

only held in reserve as one who could subs tan tiate my story.
Mr. Bro ugham received me very civil ly . He an d I had
cuo ed some slight intimacy since the Connau
jy ght Ho u se

d ays an d in Parliament voted in the same lobby . H e pro

,

fessed him selfsurprised at my early visit an d supposed I had ,

come with some special message from Her Maj esty .

‘
Not f rom H er M aj esty I told him . But I come on
’

m
,

H er Majesty s behal fwi th some secret in f

’
orm ation that ay
assi st her cause .
”

Why that is good news Mr. Tempest Af ter M r.Fl i n n s

’
, ,

folly yesterd ay afternoon we want something to sq uare our

front again which was badly breached by his cl u m siness. ’

m
,

I told hi b riefly my story as I have related it to you in

the l as t chapter.
Mr.Tem pest said he very seriously whilst I can not f
,
”

,eel
sorry that the world is rid ofthat ab ominable Spy -Mas ter it
m
,

see m s to me ouan d Mr. Flinn find yo u selves in a

m y a r r
y p e

d ica en t ifthose patrols chance to remember yo u r n ames.

’

H ave no thought ofme Mr.Brougham only 0, ,

Ofwhom i
”

OfR estel l i.
’

Eh ? Eh he as ked sharply bending forward in his,

chai r an d searching my face shre wd ly . What of Ke st elli

, ,

Mr. Tempest P H is examination is over. ’

Can younot recall him on some excuse P

’

Ha
They cannot produce him And he is suppose d to be
locked up in the enclosed camp . Y ou know the re sol ution
with regard to the witnesses that the Lord s passed on the fi rst
d ay ofthe Tri al ? Y ouhave the agents of the Bill on you r
thigh ifyou can f ind a j ust reason to d em and the re prod uc

tion ofKestelli ’
.
348 T H E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O N G
And now Mr. Brougham rose up again with a so ewhat , m
crestfal l en air as ofcou n sel whose witn ess has been di scre dited

m
, ,

an d a 1ou n ced his inten tion to recall R estel l i on accou

, nt of
the q uestion s put by the Solici tor general in thi s last cross
-

examination ofour witness. Which have l aid the foun d ation

an d created the necessity f or a second cross- m
exa in ation of
Restel l i Mr. Brou gham declared .
’
,

At the which there was a hurried con sultation an d m u , ch

whispering amongst the counsel for the Bill with eviden t

m
,

d isco fi tu re an d u n pleasant su rprise . At l ast the Ki n g s

’

m -
, m
Atto ey general rose very la e]y an d without an y spirit ,

an d ad mitted that Kestelli was not in the i r corporal

possession.
Then where is he dem anded Mr. Brougha with well m
,

feigned astoni shment. I s be dead P ’

And the At torney -general was forced to confess that he had

been sent as a co urier to Milan .
To the Milan Commission i gasped Mr.B rougham as on e
”
,

took al l aback by some tremendous revelation his very mouth,

agape .
The Attorney -general n odded sourly .
Then I shall not call him cri ed Mr. Bro ugham with as
,
’

fi n e an exhibition ofpained indignation as ever yousaw an d ,

resu med his seat with an air ofbeing shocked beyond words
at so gross a b reach oflegal good f aith.

U p stumbled the King s Attorney - ene l to his fe t with

’

g ra e a ,

b ungled excuse that R estel l i had been sent to Mi lan without

his kn o wledge an d under the impression he would n ot be
,

wanted again . To which Mr. Brougham retorted in his ,

fi n est vein ofrebuke that he could not have f

, oreseen the
necessity ofcalling Restell i again until the cross-examination
of ou r witness Giarol in i by the King s Solicitor- general who
’

had extended an d expanded the line of argument an d

rendered recalli n g thei r an u m
navoidable . Under the circu
,

m
stances if there was one thing which the agents f or the Bill
,

o ught not to have do n e it was that ofsen ding R este l l i out of

,
 IN SPITE OF THEM ALL 3 49

the country . I f the witnesses were al lo wed to depart at

pleasure out ofj urisdiction pending the proceedings there
, ,

was an end to that secu rity which thei r Lord ships thou g ht

( he th rew a bitte r sarcas m into tha t wo rd ) they po sse

s sed
that no perj ury sho u ld be permitted at thei r Bar with
impunity .
With this the fat was in the f ire The House in a blaz e of
indignation at the di sregard ofits orders. Lords Holland ,

Ellenborough Lan sdowne Carnarvon Darnley Grey the

, , , , ,

Lord Chancellor the Prime Mini ster an d many other Peers

, ,

al l entered into a heated an d acrimonio u s di scu ssion an d ,

there was a pretty kettle off ish k icking an d bubbling I can

m
,

m
— —
tell you! An d I J im y Ra bbit laughing in my sleeve ,

as merry as a mid ship an an d as pro u d as a Prin ce to thin k ,

I had been inventor of thi s pe tard which Mr. Bro ugham

exploded with such excellent skill in that august assembly .
There was a long debate which led to the calling an d
m
,

exa in ation of one named Po well a veritable employé ,

under the Milan Commi ssion . Better an d better ! F or ,

ou m u st u nde rstand th at u to thi s incident ou r side

y , p
had been f rustrated in al l thei r inq ui ries about it. H e
was pu t u scapegoat to con f ess him sel f the pe rson

m
p as a
who had recom ended that Kestelli sho uld b e sent to Mil an ,

because he had acted as a courier before an d m ade so m any

,

crossings. He had instructed Kestelli to return an d believed

’
,

he would soon be in England . Not a word about Pasco

’

m
,

which struck e as stran ge ( for his death had been reported

in the public j ournal s an d ascribed to an accidental riot)
,

until I was f orced to the concl usion that my counter accusa

tion against him ofbeing Pas co an d a an returned from
, m
tran sportation had ind u ced the agents for the Bill to hush up
m
,

the atter for fear the true hi to y o their l te py Master

, s r f a S -
shou ld become adverti sed .
Well when it came to the cross examination ofthi s witn ess
-

m
,

Powell Mr. Brougha asked him point-bl ank who was his
m m m
m
,

e ployer as a me ber ofthe Milan Co ission ?

3 50 THE Q UEEN C AN DO NO WR ON G
The q uestion was instantly objected to an d the obj ection
m
,

sustained by the Ho u se . Which d rew f rom Mr. B ro u gha

m
that agn ifi cen t extempo re declamation perhap s the boldest ,

ever vent ured by an y advocate in an Engli sh Court ofL aw

My Lord s he said this is a very importan t q uestion
’
, , ,

an d I have no object in p u tting it except for the p urp ose of

strict j ustice . I s it not of great importance to ask of a
witness in the cause who his client is when we are acting as
m
,

coun sel ofa defend an t open an d avowed ? U p to thi s omen t

I have not been able to trace the local habita tion or the
n ame ofthe Unkno wn Being who is pl ai n ti f
fin t h i s proceed
m
ing . I know not but it ay van i sh into thin air. I know
not under what shape it exists
Ifshap e it ig ht b m
e cal l ed , tha t shap e had n on e

Dis tin guisha b mm

b oin t or Li b m
m m
le in e er, j

Or sub ig ht b e cal l ed , that shad ow see

m
ed .

m
s tan ce

F or each see ed ei ther, an d what see ed his head

T he Liken ess ofa Kin g l y Crown had on I

I fI co uld see it I might interrogate it an d b ring out of

, ,

w u
its o n mo uth ( i mo th it a ) who
f h a —
d wh t it is whether
a

m
s n

it be an or ifit be but the l iken ess ofa Kingly Crown it

m
,

wears. It ay be some shapeless thing without a head or ,

head without the semblance ofa bod y.

m
t

B ut high ly an d v itally important as it is f

or y cli ent 0

kno w who is her principal accuser an d hl ghl y indi spen sable

m
,

as it is f
or me who a her ad vocate to put the q uestions to
m
, ,

the witnesses as I a legally entitled to ask an d upon w hich

, ,

I should have a right to in sist in an y of the Co urts be low I

m
,

met at every step with Youcan t ask that q uestion ’

m
a ,

You u st n ot ut that u stion

m
p q e

How then my Lords can I discharge my d uty to y

, , ,

ill ustrio us client i "

They were prodigious words pronounced in th at High

m
Chamber before the E pty Throne whose very fo undation s
—
,

they shook word s never forgiven by the King ( who I have

m
heard in his monu ental vanitywas m ost inj ured in his pride
,
,
352 T HE QUEEN CAN DO NO WRON G
Con cern in g the Duke ofClarence afi erward s Kin g Willia , m
the Fo urth the frank b lu fl geni l l -
‘
‘
a,
s ai or Kin g as it hath
, ,
’

—
been the fashion to describe him his ofliciousn ess in this
Trial was notorious ; an d not content wi th person ally cross
,

exami n ing some of the witn esses of the R oyal Lad y his ,

i
s ste r -in -l aw it was said he sou
,
ght to in fluen ce the d ecision
ofse veral ofthe Peers again st her f or which he was wel l

m
,

re b u ked by H er M a j es ty s Soli c itor -

g e
’
ne r al M r. D e n a n i n , ,

a scathing passage in his speech su mm ing up the case for the

Defence an d delivered with his stead fast gaz e fi xed pene
,

tratin gl y on the D u ke.

We have heard he said an d hear daily with alar
,
’

, , m
,

that there are persons an d those not ofthe lowest orders

, ,

an d not con fi n ed to in di vid u al s connected with the p u blic

—
press not even excl uded f rom you r au —
gust assembly who are
notoriously circul ating the most odious an d atrocious cal u m
nies against H er Maj esty . Can this fact be And can we
live in this world an d know it to be a fact ? We kn o w that
,

if a j u rym an upon such an occasion shou

, ld b e f ound to ,

possess an y knowled ge upon the subj ect of the inqui ry we

m
,

sho u l d have the right to cal l hi to the b ar as a witn ess.

Come forward we might say an d let us conf

,
”
ron t youwith
,

ou r evidence ! Let us see whether no explan ation can b e

iven of the f ct u ssert an d no ref u t tion e ffe t u ll

m
g a s
y o a a , c a y
applied Bu t to an y an who co u ld even be suspected of
so base a p ractice as whi spering cal u mnies to Jud ges distil
m
,

ling leprous venom into the ears ofj urors the Q ueen ight
m m m
,

wel l l excl ai Co e f orth thouS lan d erer an d le t

, e see thy

f I [f h u w ul d u l h b il i y f
mf h d d p i
a ce t o o s t eq a t e r es
p e cta t o an I t alia n

witn ess, ort Cou rt A s thouart,

I lm
co e an e ose open

m
n

h u
t o art h worse t an an ta assassin . B ecau s e, w hil e I a

bld ly d mful ly mi g m
n

eet n accu sers, thou art l i

m m
o an any a t a
p n n
g
d gg u b in d ti th i d
m
a er n seen oso a r
y , n con ve n
g e
p o so n e
stik i
tto h bl
n to tf S an ce word o f J u ti
m
o e se a s ce .

I would fain say my , Lords, that it was utterly i p oss ible

that thi s can be true ; but I cannot sait
y , because the fact
 ‘
IN SPITE OF THEM A LL ! ’
3 53

t
s ares me in the face I read it even in the public papers !
, ,

H ad I not known ofits exi stence in the dignity ofhuman

,

nature I would have held it impossible that anyone with the

m
,

heart ofa an or with the honour ofa Peer sho uld so ,

debase his heart an d so degrade his hon our !

m
I would charge hi as a Jud ge ; I would impeach him
a Ju d ge An d ifit were possible f or one ofthe R oy al Blood

to descen d to a course so di sgraceful I should fearlessly assert

,

that it was far more j ust that such conduct should deprive
hi mof his right to the S u ccession than that al l the facts
alleged again st H er Ma esty
j — even iftrue to the letter ofthe
—
ch ge should warrant your Lord ships in passing thi s Bill
ar

ofDegrad ation an d Divorce

OuMonday, the 6th ofNove m

b
the vote for the Secon d
er,

R eadin g of the Bill was taken , an d there was a m aj ority in

f avou r ofit of 28 . This incl uded the votes ofthe Royal

D ukes an d a doz en Mini sters partisan s an d Household
,

O ers o the King. They were not Jud ges they were
f fic f —
Prosecutors an d their support when they should have held
, ,

them selves neutral al on e gained the advantage .

,

The Third Read ing was fixed for Friday the l 0th of
m
,

Nove b er. It was the crucial vote the f

- inal an d i rrevocable
expression of the opinion of the Peers of Engl and sitting in
m
,

j udg ent upon their Queen .

H er M aj esty reached the House of Lord s at a q uarter
before noon . The am az ing courage the undaunted fortitude
,

that had sustained her through these twelve agoniz ing weeks
of insu ,
lt tribulation an d anxiety upli fted her to the end .
, ,

u —
She was a true Da ghter ofBrun swick a woman braver than
an y I have ever heard of or seen or read abou
, , t. An d in ,

the f ace ofthe adverse vote on the Second Read ing she met ,

that ill ustrious House with head held high an d pro ud eyes ,

searching f or her enemies with fearless eagle glances. ,

There was a long Debate but Her Maj esty sate through it
,

al l . Sate there on her crim son chair pl aced on the lowest level
,

23
3 54 THE Q U E EN CAN DO NO WR ONG
of the House as it had been her Throne ( that was properly set
,

side by side with that Empty One which looked d own u pon
—
her l ) . Sate an Amaz on at b —
ay a Q u een that co uld n ot b e

conq uered !
I was but a few feet distant f rom her j u st beh ind Mr , .

Brougham an d near to the b

,
ar so as to be at hand if Her
,

Maj esty req uired an y service done. And through those long
hours my eyes were fi xed on her in a fasci n ation . Her
features were in prof ile to me ; dark an d gloomy her b ro w
an d grim her f ace with indign an t abhorr
, e n t di sg u
,st writ

c l ear upon it. Sombre in her black wig wh ose ringlets ,

seemed cu rled in mock ery as they half con cealed h er cheeks ;

,

sombre the twitchin g ofher eyeb rows dyed black an d the , ,

deep line creviced between them . Sad an d pathetic the

nervous tremor on those lips that never yet had said I a , m
af rai d . An d the pose ofher fi gu re stern hau ghty contemp
’

m
, , ,

tuon s—repelling sympathy despising pity d e an d ing re

, ,

spect — splendid in its vol u ntary isolation

Once Lad y An ne Hamilton begged H er Maj esty to retire
an d partake ofsome ref reshment b ut she peremptorily re
,

fused. An hour late r a Peer approached bowed low an d , ,

presented a plate an d a glass ofwine .

There came a grim smile into Her Maj esty s face— the last ’

I have heard ever seen there in public. She declined the

m
,

re f resh ent with a f reez i n g courtesy an d the remark I can

m
, ,

take a chop at the Kin g s H ead ifI a h ungry

’
" 9

It was the pent-up bitterness of a persecuted wom an j est ,

ing in her intolerable extremity an d with a heart petrified

,

into stone by the waters ofmisery .

The long Debate drew to its close . The Bishops ofChester
an d of Glou cester concluded it with pious pl atitudes an d
a - m
me ly mouthed oral iz in gs an d the House cleared for the
,

The Kin g
’
s H ead was the tavern where JackFl in n an d I overheard
Pasco s con versation with Kestel l i.
’
3 56 T H E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR ONG
a grea t j oy ; his dark eyes sparkling with tri u ph . Mr. m
Bro ugham ru nn ing as he might b e a schoolboy down his

college cloi ster ! The lawyer left behind hi ; onl y the m

h uman an apparent. m
U p to the Qu een s door. One knock an d he flings an d leaves
’

m
,

it open an d enters to announce to the wom an he has so in co

,

arab l d efen ded — the Triu mph ofIn nocen ce .

p y
Keppel Craven an d I crept in after him eager to insin uate ,

ou r silent an d h u mble loyalty an d congratulation in to this

eat scene.

m
r
g
Her Maj esty was standi n g by the window an d B rou g ha ,

on his knee in front ofher. H e told her his n ews.

She listened b ut spake not a word . Only l ook ed fi xedl y
,

in f ront ofher her tee th biting at her nether lip to keep the
,

mastery over hersel f. No human weakness did she display

in thi s supreme moment. She as Queen to the cl im ax an d
w —
beyond it.
So passed some moments. And then she extended her
hand an d rai sed Mr. Brougham f rom his knee . And could a
Q ueenly touch ennoble Mr. Brougham was a Duke that day!
,

There was an urgent paper ofS tate to be sign ed by Her

Majesty . Mr. Bro ugham prod uced it an d gest ured to me to
,

prepare the table . I set it ready with pens an d in k.

Her M aj esty seated hersel f chose a pen held it poi sed in
m
, ,

the air with fi n gers that had not a tremor in the dipped ,

it in the ink an d wrote in a bold determined han d writing

, ,

acro ss the top ofthe page CA ROL I N A REGI N A?

,

Reg in a sti l l she excl aimed an d rose p rou dly from her
‘

m
,

-
chai Reg in a sti l l ih spite o f h l l
’
r ,
‘
t e a 1
 CHA PTE R XXV I
AN UN CROWN ED QUEEN

I T is not in the power ofmy pen to describe the rej oicings

that burst f rom the United Kingdom on p u blication ofthe
intelligence that the Bill of Pains an d Penalties was aban
doued . The Metropoli s was in verity poi sed on tiptoe outside
the barricad es in front ofthe House ofLords an d when an,

exultant voice proclaimed the news from the leads over the
piaz z a an electric thrill ofdelirious j oy passed through the
,

waiting m ultitude as it surged up in a leap of relief an d

enthusiasm .
And when H er Majesty entered her coach an d drove at a
,

slo w pace thro u gh the acclaiming streets on her way home ,

she was overwhelmed by the displ ayed love an d loy alty of

London an d sinkin g b
, , ack in her seat f or the fi rst ti
, e m
burst in to a f lood of tears an d wept her thank s to them !
I followed H er Majesty back to Brandenburgh House an d I
m
,

vow it w u
t m ult f
rom We tmin ter to H a mersmith —
m
as a s s a
tum ult an d a tri u ph
I cannot dismi ss without some mention the ill umin ations
an d deco ration s in London in hono u r of the Q ueen s victory .
’

F or three days an d nights the capital was euf Edin

‘
é te.

b urgh Dublin an d al l the chiefcities follo wed the example

, ,

ofthe Metropoli s an d every town an d vill age an d h amlet in

,

the two Ki n gdoms was given over to j oy . Not since the

p ublic rejoicings over the victory ofWaterloo an d the ter
m in ation of the Great Wars n or ever before had the Nation
, ,

ab an dou ed itselfto such tran sports ofdeligh t.

357 l
358 T HE QU EEN CAN DO NO WR ON G
In a few of the fashion able centres of town w here the ,

King s tradesmen lived poli tics were divided ; but for the
’

or the Q u
rest al l was f een with transparencies flags mottoes
, , , ,

an d b anners containing am az ing devices. A flag in Picca

dilly was embroidered wi th a gallows proper on ground
urg en t an d the motto
,

Q. What s that for f

’

f
A city draper ofered Her Maj esty Machi aveli an co unsel in
the couplet
m W
T hat thou ayst dov e-h ke b
’

m
are n o on e, e

An d ser -h k h ay injure thee I

'
’
pen t e, t a t n on e

A little di stance of
fa nother transparency displayed the
distich
May the Queen d b ike an oak

m
stan ,

An d her en e /ia
fal l l ike its l eav es 1
'

Whilst an epigramm atic tailor ad vertised the q uatrain

T hu s tru th flies its fl ags
W he re Jus tice presid es,
I n spite ofOl d B ags
An d Green B ags, b esid es I
’

— —
And he the Head an d Front of this Ofl n d in g what of
e
'

him ? He was of f to Brighton the d ay af ter the Bill was

withdrawn , to his Pavilion ( that Mr. Denman had m ad e such
fun of in his speech , amidst the unsuppressible laughter of
the Lord s) , on which , with bread selling at a shillin g the
q uartern loaf, an d coals an d other necessities of exi stence
proportion ately dear, he had sq uandered hund reds of thou
sand s of po u u
nds on senseless an d o tlandi h decorations a
s —
thousand guineas for a Chinese cabinet, eight h und red for a
clock an d ordered the entire refurni shing ofa newly -fi tted
-

apartment, spic kan d span with splendid an d co stly uphol ster

ings because it was embelli shed with a golden eagle amongst
,

acetiou
its gal axy of orn aments an d a f ,s f
riend hint ed that
3 60 TH E QUEEN C AN DO NO WR ONG
a b
ow —
in turn to each pe rson al l ofus standin g at the flat
—
indication ofher intention an d herselfseated said
, ,

My faithful friends I tank you al l for your d evotion to

,

me in de d ay of mine trial . And I do vish youd e happiness

so moch as I hafsu ffered de sorrow. An d more d an d at I
cannot tink to express 0

Later in the evenin g when she had retired with her ladies
,

to the d rawing room she m ad e a remark ( Wi n some related it

-
,
‘

to me ) that was truly a l urid flash ofwit. She was tal kin g
of the Bill ,of the f oul an d disgusting accusations ofthe ,

mal ice with which her h usband persecuted her of the charge ,

af ter charge he had rai sed against her honou r cou pling her ,

name with every gentleman to whom she had shown an y

civility when suddenly she observed in a strange reflective
, ,

tone which at on ce arrested attention

,

On l y once my dear Lady Anne have I committed

, ,

ad u ltery —she paused whilst the eyes ofal l her l adies were
,

su ddenly lo wered to the ground in an agony of nervous

apprehen sion fearing that Her Majesty s mind had given ’
,

way u nder the load ofher mi sfortunes an d I have repented

it in sorrow an d bitterness ever since went on H er Majesty
,
’
,

shaking her head ru efully at Lad y An ne Hamilton to whom ,

she ad d ressed hersel f f or that wom an was a du

, enn a ofthe
dolefullest sort . In sorrow an d bitterness. ’

The silence that followed on this con fession was ost m

pain ful for no one seemed to know what to say or where to
, ,

look or how to act until Her Maj

, , esty came to their relief
with her expl an ation
It was with the husb and ofMrs. Fitz herbert .
’

Who was the l ady (as al l the world knew) to whom the
King was legally married when he was P rince of Wales an d ,

before he committed bigamy . But that was a foible peculiar

to his father as well as hi self. m
m
I a not going to follo w the i n cidents of Her Majesty s ’

life from the time ofher trial to the h umiliation ofher ill
ad vised at tem t to attend the Co ron ation of the Ki n i the
p g n
 AN UNCR OWNED QUEEN 3 61

Jul y ofthe f
oll owing year. In order to sti f
l e the increasing
expression of favour for her the King most autocratical ly
m
,

prorogued Parliament on the 23 rd ofNove b er to which date ,

the House ofCommons had been adjourned . Th is was done

to pre vent the Commons debating a Message f rom the Q u een ,

which Mr. Denman held in his hand standing on the floor of

,

the House ready to deliver an d m ust have initiated a grave

,

d isc ussion with the temper of the nation stru ng to such a

pitch as it was over the Trial recen tl y ended.
But at that dram atic moment when Mr. Den m an claimed
,

the eye of the Speaker to deliver to him Her Maj estys

’

letter appeared the Deputy Usher ofthe Bl ack Rod with a

m
, ,

command for the Com ons to atten d at the b ar ofthe Hou se

ofLords to hear the Commission ofProrogation read !

Whereupon uprose Mr. Speaker Sutton ignored the ,

Q ueen s Message an d walked down the House amidst hi sses

’

an d cries of Shame ! Shame This is a scandal an d the

like. And after him my Lord Unscrupulous Castlereagh led
his Ministeri al m inions to the m usic of indignant howls.
,

And so was hooted in to the precincts ofthe Upper Chamber ,

an d pu blic discussion on the Queen s wrongs burked by this

’

despicable trick.
I was in my pl ace in the House an d saw the co wardly
,

su bserviency ofthe Ministers of the Crown the unworthy ,

acq u iescence of the Speaker an d the impo tence ofthe Re

,

resen tatives of the People . And there f looded into my

p
memory the word s the Queen had spoke that night in 18 14 ,

af ter she had bearded the R egent at the Opera The ,

Americans are the only true Eng l i sh left after al l ,

And now I tell you I was clean converted to H er Majesty s

, ,
’

views ! And to the scandal an d am az ement ofthe House

, ,

leaped upon my seat an d cried in my old sea-farin g voice to

,

-
my fellow members
A Washington A Washington ! to puri fy an d f ree thi s
People
Whereupon some base -born fello w m ust needs cry back at
me A C romwell to choke you Iri sh patrio ts
,
That did
 THE Q UEEN CAN DO NO W R O N G
complete choke an y f urther observations I had to of er b
f y
the shock it gave to my dignity not to mention the ribald
m
,

laughter following on it. It has ever been a l a entation to

me that I c ould not di scover the accursed scound rel who thu s

baulk ed me or I had crammed his Cromwell down his throat !

,

All ofwhich is neither here n or there ; but o n l y to show

y ou wh at a spi ritle ss
, c raven state Parli ament had f
a llen in to

in the days ofGeorge the Fourth !

And so six months sped b y the Q ue,e n living in the

strictest secl u sion in Bran d eb urgh House . I can not assert

she actu ally su ff
ered in her bodily health in an y specifi c way ,

but she had lost al l energy an d interest in li fe an d bore the ,

appearance ofa wom an worn ou t in mind an d b ody . She

wept incessantly . And her dead daughters name the sweet ’
,

young Princess Charlotte was constantly on her lips.

,

All thi s time the dif erences between the King s Party an d
f
’

the Q ueen s Party contin ued an d never could b

’

,
e l ai d . An d
they were now to be accentu ated . For on the 9 th of Ju
m
ne

the King issued a Procla ation decreeing his Coronation for

the 19th ofJul y. There was no mention ofthe Queen in it ,

an d when it was read ou t the pu

, blic greeted it wi th protests
an d cries of The Q u een ! The Queen
So soon as thi s P roclamation was issu ed H er Maj esty

m
m
,

took i edi ate steps to have her claim to be crowned

with the King recognised an d forthwith trans itted three
,
m
memorials to H is Maj esty on the subject which he re ferred ,

to the Privy Council . This did not give an ydecision till the
l 0th ofJu l y the d ay bf ore the on e fi red f or the proro atio n

m e g
,

f rl ia e n t. An d then re f u ed H er M aj esty s application.

’

o P a s

An d n ow see the intolerable trickery ofthi s The delay in

an no uncing the decision was a mere ruse to allow ofParlia
ment b eing prorogued an d disc ussion on the Q ueen s w rongs
,
’

again b u rked . As long as her memori al was u nder con sidera

tion none ofher many supporters in the House could properly
,

ventil ate her grievance . And so al though an ef fort had

m
,

been ade, an d opposed three times to create a di scussion , ,

3 64 THE Q UEE N CAN DO DO WR ON G
tell youit was most monstrou s, most sca ndalo us mt, os hock
s

ing to al l sense ofdecency !

Which brin gs me to the saddest inciden t o An d fm l ife
I would fain beg your leave to tell it in as few words as ay
y
m
be for I have not the heart to make a lon g story o ut ofit
, .

In asm uch as it brought me into con flict ofOpi n ion an d d is

g r ace with H er M aj e sty a n d m ade, me feel a bas e un g ra teful ,

wretch in spite ofmy b

, etter j ud gment .
To put it to you plain ly the Queen was not surroun ded
,

with wise advi sers at thi s j uncture . Faithful an d d evoted

they were but l acked a sense of the dignity d ue to the
,

Queen s sel f an d their loyalty did not compensate for their

’

f olly Instead ofrestrai n ing Her Majesty ever too arden t , ,

they goaded her ou. An d when in one ofthose wild fi ts of

hers ( famili ar to all in her intimacy ) which sent her stridin g
an d stor ing u mp a n d do w n the carpet an d s wingin g her
,

arm s an d apostrophiz ing Heaven an d vowi n g she wou

, , ld do
T his Thing or That Thin g or the O ther Thing she sware —
by God in Heaven she would be present at the C oron ation ,

-
,
—
the King will he nill he they took her in her h umou
- r ,

an d appl au ded her ! Which was a very unw ise evil thin g ,

m
to do .
It was schemed that very early in the ornin g ofthe
,

Coronation d ay Her Maj esty should d rive to the Abbey

, ,

before an y ofthe guards were posted an d ef fect an entrance !

,

That once within the b uilding she was to rem ai n there ,

unless ex pelled b y fo rce -a contingen cy her pro u d spirit

rejected as impossible ! And did you ever hear such a

scheme as that E
‘

To think that she who up to this time had won al l her

,

battles acting on the stri ct defen sive ( that was her p roper
s trategic po sition ) sho u ld be now encouraged to act on the
,

of fensive Did youever hear ofsuch madness as that P

I have ever been a fighter an d hot-headed . ( They did call -

me Foul tempest in the House ) I have ever p re ferred to

-

m m
.
“

draw my sword to withd rawing my word s. I a n o an to

coun sel timidity an d submi ssion .
 AN UNCR OWNED QUEEN 3 65

But here was a case in which the dign ity ofa Queen was
concerned . One whose li f e had been a long apprenti ceship to
i n sult An d now she was going to fling herselfinto the very
m
.

ud ofcertain insult
I craved an audience with Her Maj esty for to adventure
my humble opinion on the course she ought to pursue.
Which was to leave her case to the People who would see ,

u h u u
j tice done to r. B t to n the ri sk o rep ul se shef —
m
s e r ,

who as n o on the summit

w w f u —
pop l arity ever ! F or
m
o

nothing succeeds li ke success an d nothing da ns like failure .

,

And you most often lose prestige b y a d rawn ba ttle ify o u

are not a Frenchman or a Spaniard .
Her M aj esty received me in private having some su spicio n
, ,

I thi n k ,f f
o what my sel im po sed mi ssion was. F or I had
-

ever remain ed studiously silent what times the subj ect ofher
Coronation was being di sc ussed in her reception -room an d ,

she was sharp to notice anyone who did not agree with her.

She asked me abruptly what my business was.

I had learnt by heart a most eloquent speech ; l ucid ,

respectf ul brief logical an d to my mind convincing. But

, , , , ,

now that it had to he spoke confusion to me ! but it vanished

,

clean out ofmy head And left me floun d erin g an d sucking

at the air like a fi sh ou t of water ; an d al l I cou ld stammer
was
Oh Madam do not attempt it Trust to the People to
, ,

fi ght your battle f or ou F ight it not yo ursel f

y
m
.

Soh she said an d looked black an d ste ; an d waited .

’
, ,

Your M ajesty s action will be misconstrued I bl urted

’ ’

m
,

ou t. It will be said you desired to ar the Coronation .

Unworthy motives will be imputed to your Majesty by your
enemies. And the Coronation ti a so t f Raree show f
-
’
s r o , or
—
the vulgar a pageant f ree , a spectacle to be seen f or n othing .

They look on it as a sport for a general holiday . Do not

m eddle with the People s holiday ! It touches their own
’

pleasure an d am usement an d that is as dangerous as taxing

,

thei r pockets ! I f you spoil it it seems to me Mad am , , ,

d
a a nge r u
o s thing to ri sq u e . And if— if
366 THE Q U EE N C AN DO NO WR O N G
I f vot demanded the Queen her bro w d ark en i n g and ,

knitted her voice ominous with suppressed pass i on .

,

I fYo ur Majesty f ail s

F ail s she b roke in f uriously . Did I fail ven I

faced d c L o rd s ? And sall I fail ven I appeal t o de People ?
Enough ! Enough ! R un rabbit run Hide in y o ur hole !
, ,

Show de tvin kl in g vite tail ofyou she cried in a voice of

I was stung to the q uick by her cruel wo rd s that did ,

demean my L ad y .
Then more dign ified she added : I did tink Mr. Tempest
, , , ,

d at I co uld depend on you b ut hélas ! I do see n o ,

Yo ur Maj esty said I acceptin g the name by which she

,
’
,

now called me for the fi rst time in my life you have n o ,

more honest an d devoted servant than Desmon d Tempest.

And ifhis wit to put his views before your Majes ty e q ualled
his loyalty he wo uld convince you.
’
,

Pho ! Pho she cri ed . Dat is enough ! Yo ur loyalty

m
,

sir haff
, allen to de level ofyour vit . Y ou vo n d h af e to b
e

af raid Did youever know Caroline ofB run swick to act de

coward ? My R ight is to be crowned an d by Gott I v il l b e ,

crowned
An d drawing hersel f up she poin ted imperi ously to the
,

door an d bani shed me

,

The story ofthat d ay so fatal to the Queen is old hi story

m
, ,

now . How on the 19th ofJ ul y she set out fro her house
in South Audley S treet at six o clock in the orni n g as ’
m ,

though by early ri sing she could steal a m arch on the Kin g

, ,

an d his Mini sters an d myrmidon s m arshalled again st her !

How in her carriage drawn by six b, ay horses— the v ery same
—
that drew her to the tri umph ofher T rial an d accompanied
by Lord an d Lady H ood ( old friends retaken into favour) an d
Lady Anne Hamilton an d Mr.Keppel Craven she pro ceed ed to
m m
,

West inster. B uoyed up by the plaudits of the ultitude ,

who short of a Revolution could not assist her in so ill

, ,

con sidered a scheme as thi s. And Revol utions do not break

3 68 THE QUE E N CAN DO NO WR O N G
ac tual ly asked Her Maj esty ifshe woul d go in to the Abb e
y
alone ! My God can youim agine such a thin g
,

An d the end ofit was that the Queen re ti re d re p ulsed b y ,

l ow pri z e -f
ighters f rom the Abbey in which he r h u
, sband was

that d ay going to b e crown ed Kin g ofEngl an d

As she walked bac k to her carri ag e the re cri ed a voice ,

f rom the mob off ashion able-dressed wretches co llected in the

porch
Where is Bergami
And the fo ul insult d rew a burst ofri b ald l au ghter fro m
the grinning she-devil s.
Oh I tell you sirs it sickens me to th in k ofthat d ay and
, , , ,

al l my dear Mi stress end u red .

For the i n sul t ofit killed her !

All the two Kingdom s know the won dro us story ofthe
Coron ation ofGeorge the Fo urth which cost a q uarter ofa ,

million sterling . Never was there such a Coron ation bef or e ,

an d neve r will b e again .

The King was in the z enith of his vanity ; costu ed m

beyond eclipse ; in a garb that none might dare copy which ,

was doubtless a great com f ort to him . The crushing weight

of his State Cloak that req ui red seven supporters nearly
, ,

slew its R oyal victim who was at one time so so re di stressed

, , ,

under the burd en of his fi n ery that he was nigh to f ain t.

Did ever Monarch of fer such a sacrifi ce to the clai s ofthe m
costu miers art as thi s Emperor an d slave ofthe S artori al ?
’

H appily His Majesty s indisposition proved on l y te

,
’
m
orar a nd recove ring he bore himsel fright bravel y an d
p y , , ,

sto utly an d was fi n al l y anointed an d knighted in vested

, , ,

cro wned an d enthroned King of Irel an d an d Englan d ; an d

m
,

had Homage paid to hi by the Chu rch an d the nobles ; an d

sat him in St.Edward s chai r that had enthroned Al f re d an d
’

, ,

the Second Edward an d Eliz abeth an d Anne an d his honest

, , ,

clean -li ving old father ; an d was accl aimed amid st the blare
of tru m
m pets an d the boo ofguns whilst al l that was most ,
 AN UNCR OWNED QUEE N 3 69

f
ashionable an d well bred in the Kingdom shouted , May the
King live for Ever
Alas ! to think of the d egeneration of my own co untry !
To think ofseven million s of Iri shmen subj ect to fourteen
million Engli shmen an d com pelled to see a Saxon Prince
,

sitting on the throne an d u

, surper ofthe gl ory ofthe Kingly

tri be ofmy native l and !

In the evening there was a great State Banq uet holden in
Westmin ster Hall . T he Ki n g was toasted an d heard his ,

servants an d admi rers his Mini sters an d his Cou

, rtiers sing ,

Scatter his enemies ! Frustrate their knavish tricks ( H ad

they not more honestly sung Scatter her , An d
H is Maj esty ro se an d m ade a speech bowing with great con ,

descension an d his in fi n ite grace to the gilded throng an d ,

The King than ks his Peers. He dri n ks their heal th an d

the health ofhis Good P eople
And thought it pruden t when the Banq uet was over in
, ,

ord er to avoid his Good P eopk who were clamouring in the

,
’

streets for j ustice to the Q u een an d against whom he had

,

been secretly warned an d urgently advi sed not to return to

,

Carlton Palace by the route he had come— to avoid the

embraces of his Good P eopk H is Majesty returned f
,
’
ro m
his Coronation Banquet by unf req uented ways an d not by ,

the road proper past Parliament Street Whitehal l an d the , ,

statu e ofCharles I .
It was Lieutenant de Ros an old Westminster schol ar
, ,

who knew the su rrounding sl um s an d piloted H is Maj esty s

,
’

—
carriage the flying co ch a o f —
the King ofEngland through
unsuspecting lanes an d unsuspicious alleys to Tothill Fields ,

an d the notorio u s Five Fields an d thence by a great , ,

detour to Constitution Hill an d the back d oor of Carlton

,

Palace which was safely an d thankful]y reached be fore

,

midnight .
By God sirs I tell you Engl an d wanted a Cromwell an d
,

Ireland a Washington in the days ofGeorge the Fourth .

24
 C HAP TER XX V I I
T HE G R E AT R E LE AS E

MY log is almost written up ; the voyage dra w s to its close.

And I have little more to tell you but that littl e sad —ah
, ,

sad beyond comp are

Y ouknow how I was bani shed f rom my Q u ee n s s e rvi ce and

’

favo u r because I failed in my d u ty an d d e v o ti on to her.

Who had no right to do aught but hono ur an d obey
bli n dly .
The d ay after the Coronation the Q ueen gav e Annette
leave of absence. It was not harshly done ye t with an ,

intention to markdi sapproval of my cond uct . An d it was

accompanied w ith one rem ark that wru ng my si ster s heart. ‘

Under your b roder s roo f my dear d at han d so

’

, , e cavalierm
vill do ubtless come bac k to you v on ce more . A n d even
though I hate him I do tink d at he do love youv er moch.
,
’

An d it is so best

—
to ass a h r e—
Whereby it came p th t we t e Annette Winso e , m ,

d myself so stran gel y gathered together b F te i u

m y a n o r
childhood who our dear Q ueen had once in the ol d days
m
,

h f
o te children were part ed fro
- ’
condescended to c lla e r s r ,

her when her mi sf ortunes an d her miseries m ade our hearts

bleed an d th rob to be permitted to serve her.
Annette s heal th was very indif ferent an d b ro ke down
’

whe n H er Majesty di spensed with her services. F or fo urteen

years with but one interval she had served the Q ueen ; for
, ,

ten n u rsed the sorrow ofa di sappointed love . She was a

3 70
3 72 T HE QUEE N CAN DO N O WR ON G
MADAU
m m
,
‘
I presen t y hu b
l d uy e t to l ou
’
r M ajes ty , an d, on

to than k Yo mM y ’

f or the d rafi f orwarde d b L d A

mm
m mMm
c esty a
y y
H aM M M t g nM fl w a

T ernpest s
’
services which Your Ma
j y
est has b
ee n
p l eased to

An d Miss m
T e pest an d m
y lfhumbl
sey ubmi s t u
o rsel ves to

F ro mY u Maj y o r est
’
s Hu bm
le an d F aithfi d S erv an t,

I sent this letter to Brandenburgh House ad d ressed to

m
,

Her Maj esty in person an d the nex t day there ca e back a

,

reply w rote by the Q ueen herself as f

ol lows : ,

T he Qu een ha f received de Master

qfT e p esto wn s le tter, m ’

an d sen d s her l ove to An n ette.

‘
T he Qw en is g rieved to hear qfher il l n ess , an d hopes she
e b
b ’
vil l soon etter.

When I read this letter to the poor girl she pro fessed to
6 n d vast co f
’
m
ort in it inasm uch as Her Maj esty had
, sen t

her love.
An d if Colonel Surges would do the same said Wi n so e
’
m
m m m
,

to e that night I a of opinion our A n nette ight

,
’
regain her health .
Do not mention him in such a conn ection I told her ’

m
, ,

for he is a traitor an d we can hol d no alli ance wi th hi

, in
ou rfamily .
’

Shimmy perhaps youwere m istook . Y ouk n ow sir you

m m m
, , ,

so etimes are m istook ( This did ake e very a n

g y)
r .
And it is certain that Colonel S urges loves An n e tte an d ,

whatever he sai d or did remember it was f or her sak An d

m
, e.

in similar ci rcumstances Shim y I thin k youwoul d d o the

, ,
 THE GREAT RELEASE 3 73

same for me — w ouldn t you dear i ( Here herar stole round

’
,
”
m
my neck very persuad ing .) And ifyoulove Annette I would
, ,

have youseek S urges for her an d clear this cruel matter up. ,
’

I will not said I an d stif fened my upper lip . T he which

’

m
, ,

fi cul t thing to do when Winsome pleaded .

was an a az ing d if
But my d uty to the Q u een req ui red it.

The next particular date I remember was the evening

when the Q uee n atten ded Drury Lane Theatre to see Mr.
Kean m ake his reappearance on his return from Ameri ca. I
went too ; an d ifyoum ust know why it was to get a glimpse
, ,

of H er Maj estys face an d sati sf y myself that it went well

’

with her. For Annette had told me how when she returned
m m
,

f ro her atte pt to enter the Abbey on the d ay of the

Coronation she had burst into tears as she crossed the
,

threshold of her home an d cried aloud I have received my, ,

d eath b a l ow
The play was Othello which character Mr.Kean enacted
‘
,
’

an d there were m any passa es in it th at co u ld be con strued

g
i n to all usio n s to Her M ajesty s case which you ay be sure ’

,
m
the actor gave with d ue emphasis. It el ectrifi ed the ho use ,

where each point was snap ped up often in anticipation an d , ,

uproario usly cheered an d twelve times Pit an d Gallery stood

,

up an d sal uted my Q ueen .

Can you wonder if my memory went back to that scene
at the Opera se ven years bef ore when the allied Sovereigns ,

were visiting London an d Her Majesty s reception a coun ter

,
’

part of this ? An d I privileged to attend her an d stand

m
,

beside her an d bring her a glass ofwater an d of fer her y

m
, ,

ar ! I who was n o w watching her f

, ar of
rom af fin di sgrace , ,

an d af raid to show my f ace !

And watching noted with an aching heart the listless

, ,

m anner the fatigued air the signs ofstress an d suf

,
fering deep
,

scored on her f eatures in these short ten days past ; an d her

broken health made mani fest to anyone who had studied the
phases ofher coun tenan ce .
3 74 TH E QUEEN CAN DO NO WR O N G
m
And in that te ple ofpleasure n ot consecrate to prayer
m
, ,

I prayed silently 0 God save my Q ueen Sen d her

m
, , co

fort an d good cheer ! 0 God save y Q ueen ,

Three days later an d the fi rst thing I read when I open ed

,

was a bu lletin an nouncin g the serio us illness of

H er Maj esty .
Then I tell you I was distracted . For a fearful premon i
, ,

tion sei z ed me which I could n ot discard th at this was the

, ,

Beginning ofthe End .

It was the fi rst d ay Ann ette had lef t her cha ber. She m
was resting on a co u -
ch in the dra ing room an d I b roke the
w ,

news to her. And by a strange foreboding coin c idence the , ,

w ords she u ttered were identical with those my own fears had
framed

Thi s is the Beginning ofthe End

What shall I do i I asked hel plessly . Dare I presume to
”

call at Brandenburgh Ho use

No Shimmy said Annette sadly .
, ,
’

The next d ay the B ulletin was more omino us. I went in

the morning to C ambridge Ho u se ( Her M aj e sty s to wn
’

residence ) where I f ound a great crowd assembled watchin g

m
, , ,

with the u tmost anxiety for the arrival ofintellig ence fro
m
,

Ham ersmith . There was a fleet offlying rumours cruising

abou t : the King s physician s were in charge ofthe ill ustrious
’

patient ; she had been blooded an d sixty-six oun ces taken ,

from her ; she was in grievo u s p ain an d u nable to retain food ,

or med icines ; the l awyers Mr. Bro ugham Mr. D enman

m
, , ,

Dr. Lushington an d Mr. Wylde had been preven ted f ro

m
m
, ,

starting on ci rc u it where they were d ue an d su on ed to

, ,

B randenburgh Ho use to draw up Her M aj esty s Last Will ’

an d Testament . Oh I tell youit was di stracting an d m ade

m m
, ,

blood f eez e to hear ofsu ch d read happenings an d l f

m
y r se
y ,

cu t ofl f rom my Lady s service at su ch a ti e !

'
’

m
I returned ho e an d held a con sultation with An n e tte an d
Winsome an d at last persuaded them to my way ofthin king
,
3 76 T HE QUEEN C AN DO NO WR O NG
these three days an d will not stir fro o utsid e her window
,
m ,

where he j abbers his gibberish prayers al l d ay an d al l night ;

an d killed a f owl yesterday with cuttin g its throat an d then ,
'

poured the blood over a big stone he has set up as a God ’

T is very wrong I said knowing H er Maj esty s m ate rn al

‘ ’ ’

, ,

affection f or yo u ng Austin ( who was not un worth y ofit) ,

not to let Mr. Willie see the Q ueen . ’

Indeed it is sir. Brunette says Her Maj esty asks for hi

,
m
constantly an d was complain ing only thi s f oren oon How
m
,

odd it is that Wil l ikin s never comes near e T is the

’

King s physicians Mr.Tempest T hey an d thei r ord ers fro

’

, . ,
m
the Ministers. The Government is Master here now an d it ,

is the King s comman d s an d not the Queen s wishes that

’ ’

obtain respect. But she ll soon send them bundling ifit ‘

pleases God to send her better. ’

There were writing m aterials on the table an d a sudden ,

au dacity sei z ed me to write a letter to Her Majesty I took .

a sheet an d witho u
, t thought or consideration set on it the
, ,

fi rst word s that came unbidden to my pen .

m m
, ,

Ji Rm bbit s hu bl d ut t Y
’
w M j yt — wm h G d
m
y a e y o o r a es o o
reserve to those who out fy u charity u d d
o
md
p o r o a a
y s ve
, n ,

u u
s cco red , an d a e to love yo .u ’

Krackel er, id I an youhave an y kindly fee ling for me

’
sa ,

— whom youtoo kto be a sailor when he was a little charity

boy— see that thi s note is delivered to Her Majesty. ’

‘
I vow it shall b e Mr. Tempest even if it co sts , e my , m
sit uation he promi sed me .
’
,

That was at two o clock ofthe afternoon of Saturd ay . I

’

drove home an d gave my sad report to Annette an d Win some ,

an d ou t again to Cambridge Ho u se at six to see ifan u

f rther
y
B ulletin had been posted . And when I returned co nceive ,

my thank f ulness an d un speak able gratitude to fi n d a letter

for me f rom B randenb urgh Ho u se . It was in a stran e hand
g
—
writing the German m aid B runette s as I learn t— but ,
’

signed by the Q u een . And it read

 TH E GREAT RELEASE 377

I m d
’
I d id sen d youan d An n ette an ay.

mm m
t
m
a ver son
a
y
An d do you, an d she , an d y pretty Vin so e co e to orrow-

morn in , an d
g if I u b et ter I sam
l l see you—w n d say de

Good - b
ye
’
CAR OLI NE R.

Fate was kind . When we reached Brandenburgh House

early the next mornin g we were transpo rted to hear that

H er Maj esty had slept well an d was better. Krackel er had ,

speci al orders abou t n a an d we were shown into the Equerries

,
’

room an d w aited th ree hou

, rs.

To the amaz ement ofher attend ants the Q ueen insisted on ,

getting up an d dressing an d sitting in a chair ( without leave

m
,

fro her phy sici ans ofwhom only one rem ained in waiting
m
,

af ter the orning B ulletin was considered an d decided ou ,

H er Maj esty being so m uch improved) . And about noon she

inquired ifwe had arrived an d sent for us. ,

We were ushered into her room with the intim ation that ,

we m ust not stop more than fi ve minutes. And oh my God ! ,

when my eyes fell on her I read Death in her face It was

a shock so terrible af ter the hopeful news with which I had
,

been beguiled that I felt queasy an d nigh to fain t. An d al l

, ,

I could do was to sink on my knees before her my heart ,

bursting with angui sh .

Feebly the Queen stretched out herhand an d with a to uch
m
, ,

as tende r as a su nbea laid it on my head .

,

she said . That was al l but I knew it was her ,

forgiveness an d her blessing.

Then she spake a few words ofloving kindness to An nette ,

who was on her knees.

Weep not , my dear she said an d kissed her on her
,
’
,

c heek drawing her f ace toward s her an d taking Winsome s

’
, ,

h and very l anguid an d weak ki ssed her too . My pretty

m
, ,

V in so e she said
,
’
I vas tinking ofyour dear moder last
,

n ight an d de old happy day s at M on tagu e House 1 ’

,
 378 T HE QUEEN CAN DO N O WR O N G
The exertion of recei vin g u s had nearly
prostrated her,

with the cal l u p on her sen sibility . H er head , on ce so p roudl y

carried , was shak ing painf ully with her weakness, as sh e let it
f al l back u pon the pillow, an d rolled it heavily fro side to m
side to tr an d fi n d ease . I rose to retire , the tears rain in
y g
do wn my cheeks, afraid to trespass on her fortit ude for even
m
in this extre ity there was apparent a gl im er of the ol d m
Bru nswick pride an d enduran ce in the fi r set of her on th. m m
But as she realiz ed my p u rpo se , she held up h er h an d with a

flutterin g gest u re of dissent, an d sank back in h e r chair,

s
.ilent
f u
or a f l l minute , whilst we stood so o w stricke n ro u
rr - nd

Ch ild ren she whi spered at length turning he r tire d head

,
’
,

on her cu shion to look at u it hafcome to say de last

m
s ,

Good -bye N ay do not grieve

, Y ouvoul d not vi sh e
to live Shimmy ? I sall be happier in an od er world d an dis.
,

I hafno vi sh to live . I von d rader d ie. ’

m
She spake with the cal which inhabits a soul that has n o
crime to conf ess to God b , ut is prepared to pass the threshold
ofthe Dark Beyond .

E n gland she went ou nodding her head slo wly an d

’

mm
‘
, ,

ou f ul l y England haf been to me a land ofsorrow an d

persecution But I do know how to love dose faith ful English
m
who hafal vays sy patiz ed vid me in my sorrow an d done ,

al l in dere power to def eat de malice ofmy persecutors. An d

f or d at m ali ce — she l u rched heavily f orward in her chair
’
,

an d strove to rai se her poor weak hand alo f

, t an d shake it
I de fy it still
—
As s e spake t ngthless an death doo ed there came a
h d m
m
s
, r e ,

phanto flash ofher ancient spirit into her eyes an d the

m
,

lines hardened grimly around her outh . But on l y for a

m
mo ent : her m anner softened the light of def , ian ce died
away ; they were t he old kind bl u , e eyes but fading now like
,

the sea in the di stance that looked tenderly an d trustingly

,

at me as she whi spered

m
m m
m
Sh i — I d o sh arge. you s on t in g V en I a d
m
ead
y
m m
.

d is very veek — t el l Ca e S u rge s h ex. Xxh. t gfi fi x . a

3 80 T HE QUEE N CAN DO N O WR O NG
des dou kurs phis iq ues, mi j pui
s e u
s vo s ass m
urer q ue je quitt i
l a vie san s reg ret?
And little b
a efore the end m ad e thi s path e tic request to
on e who was standing by her

Do not let me be m ad e de sho w ofaf t er y d eath . Derem

hafbeen q ui te enough ofd at in my lif eti e . m ’

An d almost her last word s were

‘ —
Dey hafdestroyed me at last ! B u t I f org iv e dem .
I die in peace vid al l m ankind . My P h ysicians kn ow
—
vot my m al ady is it is here An d laid her h an d upon her
broken heart.

When the end came at half-past ten o clock on T uesday ‘

n igh t the 7 th ofA u

, gust 18 2 1 there hap pen ed an awful—s
, ,

su e n a ra —
p r t l m an i festation ofNature.
u
At the very moment she surrendered her so ul t o her Maker
m
,

there arose mysteriously summoned fro the vast Un seen

, ,

ou t of the nothingness of the Aut u mn welki n —a mighty

ru shing wind . It burst wide the doo rs an d flun g open the
,

windo ws ofthe C hamber ofDeath in si stent in its in vasion at

,

the supreme momen t when the dying Q ueen ren d ered up the
Ghost.
It was as ifthe Spi rit ofthe Storm had d escen ded f ro m
Heaven to receive an d escort on high her ki n d red S pirit ,

wh ose voyage of li f e had b een on e con tinu al con flict with

contending elements.
Oh my Q ueen
, My innocent brave Q uee n ! P ersecuted
, ,

sorrow sco ur ed and long -suf

fe ring ! In ad v ersity a d
g , n

st ru ggle with peerless courage through tempestuo us tribul a

, ,

tions thou did st well win the Great Re lease an d in thy

, , ,

saintly exit f rom thi s stormy sphere ascend i n to the Ever

,

l astin g Harbou r!

THE EN D
 POSTSCR IPT
SI C T RANSIT GLORI A

I H AV Ewritten T he End to my story an d for me it is

‘
,

fi n ished ; an d yet to do my friend Col onel Hastings S u

, rges

Hastings j ustice I bring myself to ad d this postscript .

m
,

Indeed he tells me it is necessary if I a to have him

,

m arried at all which happy consummation he co uld not

,

arrive at in his own book ! An d that is my excuse f or a

chapter that has no right to be here.

The King on his way to Ireland to conquer that Kingdom

,

by his condescen sion heard ofthe Queen s death at Holyhead . ’

m
,

It threatened to ar his coming festivities an d in order to ,

minimi z e such a dread ful fi asco Lord Liverpool with H is

m
, ,

Maj esty s approval deter ined that the Q ueen s R em ains

’
,
’

shou ld be sent out ofthe Kingdom with the utmost expedition .

At the same time H is Maj esty comm anded Lord Castle
,

reagh now become the Most Noble the M arq u

,
i s ofLondon
derry to write to the Lord Chan cellor an d say (in ter alia)
, ,

H is Ma
i y reg ard the occas ion f the Queen
’
t can n o t
es o s

D eath in an y other l ig ht than as f p

the g reatest o al l ossibl e

de l iveran ces, b
oth to H is Maj y
es t an d the Cou
n tr ?
y
Four d ays later the King l anded at H owth an d entered
Dublin. H is Maj esty was under the in fluen ce of liq uor ;
the voyage across the channel had been spent in drinking
copious draughts of hi ky punch eating goose pie an d
w s - -
, ,

singing f estive songs. He was hilarious loquacious an d , ,

38 1 l
38 2 T HE QUEEN CAN DO N O WR O N G
(l etHum an Nature hope) irrespon sible . It w as con fidently
asserted that he saw dou ble the n um be r of h is bel oved Irish
S ubj ects than were actually present in th e flesh . An d he
mad e a speech that has no parallel in histo ry.
Made it to the vulgar herd the common ul titude which
, m , ,

to the shame of my n ative country s capital ( th at un der

’

the Castle in fluen ce ever harbours a King s P arty) collected ’

m
, ,

to welcome him with noi sy cl a ou r an d d iss i at ed rejoicin gs

p
what time she l ay dead an d unburied on wh ose cof fin b h
m
m
er
, y ,

own co and were engraved her wo rds

,

H are l ies Carol in e o f B m -

uwie k ,

T he in j
wred Queen ofE n g l an d .
’

Thi s is the King s Speech

’

My Lords an d Gentlemen an d my Good Yeo anry ! I m

m
,

cannot express to you the gratifi cation I feel at the war

an d kind reception I have met with on thi s d a of l ndi m
y
m
a ng
y
amongst my I ri sh S u bjects. I ay not be abl e to
express my feelings as I wi sh. I have travelled far an d made
m
,

a long sea voyage . Besides which parti cu l ar ci rcu stances

,

have occurred known to you al l of which it is better at

,

present not to speak . Upon those subjects I leave it to del i

cate an d generous hearts to appreciate my feelin gs This is
one ofthe happiest d ays ofmy li fe I have long wished to
— m
vi sit you y heart has always been Iri sh . R an k ,

Station honours are nothi n g to me ; but to feel t hat I live

,

in the hearts of my Irish subj ects is the most exalted happi

ness. I m ust now once more than k youfor your ki n dness an d
welcome an d bid youfarewell . Go an d do by e as I shal l
, m
do by you—drink my health in a bumper ! I shal l d rink all
yours in a bumper ofgood I rish whi sky
One ofthe happiest days ofhis life
And the inj ured Q ueen of England l ay cof f
in ed in her

And he could apostrophi se delicate an d ge nerous hearts ’

!
38 4 T HE QU EEN CAN DO N O WR O NG
The ed
ord er rou
only re veal ed at the l ast o t
te was m
mm
before the Procession started . It was arran ged so as to sk irt
the city of London caref ully an d d el ib
e rat el
y fl
, o ut th e ex

p ressed wishes of its citiz en s. Thus did the Min isters in

thei r madness provoke the tum ult that fo l l o wed .
An d to f urther good the people reso rt w as had to the
mm
, ,

follo wi n g abominable trick to b athe their in ten t . F ro ti e

m
to ti e horsemen were sent gall oping forward as with ,

au thority to cryfalse intelligen ce to the waitin g rain-sodden

, ,

m ultit udes ofthe inten ded l ine of march so as to dispen e

m
, ,

them into dif ferent wrong directions away fro the actual
stree ts to be traversed.

Bu t this con temptible artifice recoiled on the h eads of

those who stooped to adopt it. For be in g d i scovered it , ,

excited a passionate frenz y in the minds ofthe popul ace and

m
m
,

hundreds ofhorsemen volunteered to ride down the Ha er

m
s ith R oad an d accompanying the co rte
, , ge k ee
p the pu b lic ,

correctly informed minute by minute of its progress an d

, ,

di rection .
This plan being carried successful ly into O peration the ,

people n ow seiz ed m astery ofthe streets the Procession had

to pass along an d with them control ofthe ro ute ; for at
, , ,

Ch urch Street Kensington where the intentio n had been

, ,

that the hearse should turn of ? north to the Bayswater

R oad al l in an instant it was head ed back the road way du
, g ,

up an d the Procession brought to a halt.

m
,

Unaware ofthe reason an d fearing there had been so e

,

breakdown owing to the heavy state ofthe roads I d escen ded ,

from my coach in my long mou rning cloak an d cru ised ahead ,

to see what mi shap had occurred . And so di scove re d the

impediment an d was able to gauge the temper of the cro wd
,

that had n ow begun to cry:

Shame Shame To the City Straig ht on !
Straight on
With great d if m
ficul ty I ad e my way back to y coach . m
An nette I said as I found my seat again , an d wrun g the
,
’
,
 SI C TR ANSIT GLORIA 38 5

w ater f m
my trailing gar ents there is mischiefbrewing.
m
rom ,

The Govern ent m ust give ia for the People will not ,

Well this was the begi n ning of a progress where every

m
,

advance had to be f ought over an d any pitched battles took ,

place. Not to weary youwith a tale which would have to be , ,

te n times told did I rel ate al l the checks we experienced let ,

me briefly say that the same struggle occurred at many

pl aces an d particularly at Hyde Park Corner an d Park Lan e
, ,

which we found bl ocked up O wing to thi s the cortege was .

forced into Piccadilly on its certain wayto the City . Where

upon a halt was called an d a h urried Council ofWar held .
,

An d now strong rein forcements ofcaval ry began to arrive ,

ofthe Horse G u ards an d the Bl u es an d to close round the ,

hearse an d hug the anchored fleet ofcoaches. Their presence

compl eted every element ofcon flict between the military an d
the People ; but the sight ofthei r drawn sabres struck a chill
at f irst so that when the order was given to turn round an d
m ,

arch back it was able to be execu

, ted .
Park L ane being compl etely barricaded there was on l y one ,

road p racticable— namely thro u gh Grosvenor Gate an d by

, ,

way ofthe Park paral lel with the lane to Cu mberl and Gate .
The retrograde movement had broke up the Procession as
m
originally arshalled an d in the confusion an d disorder my
,

coach had somehow gotten immediately behind the hearse

instead ofsixth in the l ine. I was conseq uently in a position
to see clearly the struggle that went on around the Royal
R emain s between soldiery an d People.
We slipped through the Grosvenor Gate solely by the
display of naked steel . Once within the Park an d the
crowd excl uded we made better weather of it an d run ning
, , ,

free fetched up at Cumberland Gate about one o clock ’

m
, ,

having been over four hours in stor an d con flict with the
mob an d the battle still a drawn one .
,

We found C umberland Gate shut an d a dense crowd

collect ed giving vent to the most frantic cries an d expostul a
,

tions with demands shouted for us to go back to Piccadil l y .

,

25
38 6 THE QUEEN CAN DO N O WR O N G
Whereupon mi l itary were ord ered to st or the gate and
the m
g et i t open ed an d were su
,
ccessfu l at the c ost of a f ew fing m
chopped of an d a prick or two at those wh o w ould n ot f
,
all

away when su mmoned to do ao.

T he gate on ce open ed the G u ard s drave t h e crowd hack
m
, ,

an d cl eared a con siderabl e space f or ou r ex i t f

ro th e Park in to
the Ed gware Road almost Opposite to which w e deb
, au ched ,

T he hearse moved ou an d the coach I was in f

, oll owed
These were the only t wo vehicles that had won c lear ofthe
a te when the re rose a lou d sho u t an d I perceiv ed the people
g , ,

breaking do wn a portion ofthe parapet wal l oft h e Park and

m
,

arming them selves with the i ron railin gs that su r ou nted it.
The wreck supplied them with missiles w hich the y had hitherto
l acked an d their attitude increased to very threatenin g.
,

Brick s an d ston es began to fly an d hu rtle in the air ; the

horses in the hearse were struck an d turned restiv e an d the ,

sol d iers pelted b mi ssiles three f alling to the g rou d

y
m
, n .

In this extre ity Sir R o b ert Baker the Chi ef Magistrate ,

at Bow Street who was in charge ofthe Process i on p repared

, ,

to read the Riot Act.

Whilst he was doin g so I who was leaning hal f-way out of
m m
,

the window of y coach watching the f ray observed a an ,

dart out ofthe mob an d thro ugh the closed ran ks of caval ry
holding it b ack an d with incredi b le audacity sp ri n g at the
m
, , ,

bridle ofthe olfleader attached to the hearse an d a idst

-

m
, ,

the cheers of the populace begin haul i n g with ight an d

,

m was— Su
mm
And th t a an r es
g .

m
Now you m ust know I was at thi s o en t worked up to
an intense state of ind ign ation an d excitemen t as I e ver a
m m
,

when t u ult an d con flict 13 goin g on around e . The dis

honour being d one to my Sovereign s sacred R e ain s this m m
disgraceful brawling over her l ast j ourn ey in furiate d e. m
My sympathies were with the People whose sy pathies were m
m
,

with my Q ueen . And with each reverse they sus tain ed y

388 T HE QUEEN C AN DO N O W R ON G
it, I spran g at the bit ofthe n ear leade r ofth e h earse , which
had tu rn ed restive an d thrown its postilio n , b rou ht it back
g
in to its collar with a pl unge that mo v ed up th e t ea , and m
turn ed its head in to the direction ofthe O x ford R oad , whilst
S urges, with the cry on his lips, For the Quee n For the
Queen urged forward the animal he was s till cl utching the
b ridle of, him sel fwell in adv an ce of it.
At your peril cried an of fi cer, drawi n g his sw ord, and
spu rring his horse f orward , an d with a j erk of t h e bit brin g
in g it to its haunches within striking di stan ce ofS u
m
rges.
At my peril sho uted S urges conte ptuously. And f or

the hon o ur ofthe Innocent Queen ofE nglan d

At which moment Sir Ro b ert Baker fi n ished read ing the
R iot Act an d si u , m
ltaneo usly there rang out the word of
command F ire ,

On its echo a rattle ofcarbines a deaf enin g v o lley the, ,

fi l l ed with smoke ; sword s cl ashing horses rearin g an d kick in g

m
, ,

the stallions in the hearse screamin g wicked ] y th e ultitude

yelling like demons ; shouts cries groans sh rieks turmoil, , , ,

riot an d shock — God kno ws what or what not F or al l of

m
, ,

a su dd en there was blood in the air the scent o f it in y

m
, ,

nostril s the flow ofit over my face the taste of it in y

, ,

mouth the crim son ofit in the sky that glowered d o wn upon
,

this hideo us carnival of civil war waging round the corpse of

my Q ueen . Blood an d an ind istinct roaring an d a hurrican e
, ,

of hoof eet thundering do wn upon me an d the v oice of

s an d f

m
,

Surges shrieking Jimmy ! Jim y in his fre n z y . An d

m
,

then the light ofd ay was blotted out fro my vision an d all ,

sou nds hushed an d I lying insensible beneath the feet ofthe

,

horses that d rew my dead Q ueen s body ’

We were put on our tri al or it, S u

f rge s an d I , ch ar e d with
g
an d an d
’
Rebellion R io t,
breaking the King s peace an d the ,

head s of his soldiers— God knows how many ! B ut they

scored u six a ainst me an d gave S urges credit f
o r a th r
p g ,n o e

six ! And you might have thought we were a B uon aparte

 SIC TR ANSIT GLORIA 38 9

an dShaw-the-Li fe-Guard sman rolled into on e for the terror

we i n still ed an d the d angero u s political designs we were
accu sed of harbou ring ! An d we had wo u n ds bruises , ,

broken ribs cut head s an d carved bodies enough between

, ,

us to support a young Scotch surgeon f or six months on

full ration s an d his rent paid !

Bu t there was one con solation with it al l . The People won
the d ay an d my dead Quee n escorted by her Citi z ens was
, , ,

carried throu gh the heart ofthe City of London that loved ,

her so an d honoured her more in death than ever it did her

husband in li fe !
It would have gone hard with S urges an d me but for Annette
an d Winsome who were per itted to vi sit u m
s in p ri son an d

m
, ,

inister to our wants an d obtain proper med ical aid the

, ,

which we very sorely need ed ; being but a pair of battered

hulks with our beauty spoiled for ever that was a grievo us
, ,

blow to S urges who goes to thi s d ay with a limp in his leg

,

an d hal fan ear !

Notwithstandin g which the King had no compassion for us

m
,

an d declined to exercise the R oyal Clemency ( which da n ,

me if I for one would have accepted ) altho ugh it was

, , ,

petitioned for by ten thousand citiz ens ofLondon an d al l the

m
,

Iri sh patriots in Parliament an d de anded by the publ ic

,

papers when we were sentenced to a year s imprisonment

,
’

an d a hu e ofFive H u ndred Poun ds each .

It was Surges who was hit most hard for he was dismissed
m
,

from the army an d on the top of that his marri age to

, , , y
sister was def erred for a year when it might have taken place
m
,

there an d then had he bee n a free an .

F or within the pri son wall s An nette an d I conveyed to hi m
—
the gracious message ofHer Majesty that she had forgiven
hi f m rom the botto m
ofher heart an d her dying req u ,est to
him that he should forgive her.
And Annette del ivered into his hands the Peacock s feather ’

which the Queen had commanded sho uld be returned to him

as a token ofher f orgiven ess.
3 90 T HE Q UE EN C AN DO NO WR O N G
An d wh en he eived that he broke do wn altogether
rec ,

weepin g an d reproaching him sel f an d ex tol ] in g her n ob

,
le

sh own him b y ou r Q ueen .

An d co uld only hold his clasped han ds out t o An nette in

m
si l ent appeal an d only she co u ort hi . An d did w
m
,
l d com f ,

there within the prison wall s where she gav e h erse lfto hi .
,

An d I told him ofthe inj unction that the Queen had laid
m
upon me namely to askhi to be kind to An n ette.
m
, ,

Which he was—the kin dest husband a wo an ever had

for twenty years.

An d so sirs here comes my story to its en d

, , ost
p p m m
erly ,

al b eit as stori es do n ot often end (unless the h an gm an len ds

a han d ) wi th the two ofn a in Newgate gaol. B u
, t for Su rge

an d I ther e was n o sh ame in ou r situati on but rather an

,

exceeding great contentment an d delight to th i n k that we

were privileged to su f
fer for the cau se of ou r N o ble Lady ,

whose lo vin g kin d ness had turn ed our angry h earts to on e

-
another.

An d never in our lives held we our heads high er than in

the pri son cell of His Majesty King George the F ourth
proud suf f
erers for his Royal Consort s sake proved com rades
’

m
m
,

in a common cau se fond brothers in a co

,
on aiflictibn .
3 92 T HE QU EE N CAN DO NO WR ON G
An d when the Hope ofEn glan d whirl e d past the terrace
m
a id st the flashin g escort, the H eir A ppare n t an d his beau ti
ful youn g bri d e f
rom the Northern Seas th a t D an ish in vader

m
who had co e to con qu er al l hearts b h i i t ibl ch ) m
m
y e r rres s e ar ;

when al l voi ces were loud in accla ation , h ats raised, kerchief s

them l ike rice, I chan ced to glan ce back in to th e oo md

m
r , an

ught si ght ofthese t wo old

m
ca en .

They alone were grave in that glad co pan y an d I over

m
,

heard Mr. Te pest whisper

God gran t her greater blessin gs than atten d e d our Prin

m
cess

An d little l ater at table when the cha pag n e was f

a , l ow
in g an d the Toast ofthe Day had been h on oure d an d all ,

went merry as a m arriage-bel l again I ca ugh t a vagran t

’
,

gl impse ofthem .
Their glasses were fil l ed an d raised ; they were l ooking in to
each other s eyes ; an d looking bowe d their h ead s re veren tly
’

m
, ,

to a toast that passed between the . N ot spoken b ut

m
,

mutually co prehended. Drun k in w e drin k to

m
the Me ory ofthe Dead .

BI L L I N G AND SO N S , L TD ., P RI N T m
, GUI L D N R D
 Tel e
g za hic Ad d reu- BOOKBTOBB.LON DON . 1 010 110110 Ro. 3524 O
2
— EE AL.

AN A L P H A B E T I C AL C AT A L O G U E
O F B O O K S I N F I CT I O N A N D “

GE N E R AL L I T E R AT U R E
P U B L I S H E D BY
C HA I T O
' ‘

N D US WI
1 1 1 S T . MA RT I N S L A N E
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C HAR I N G C ROSS
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