Once taken place in a terribly dreadful time, there was a small cat-licking bird

that lived on a not-so-big lane by my house whose name was Charles just like every
other soul, male or female, that lived on my smelly, stinky, orange , old, rotten,
messy, busted cul-de-sac between Belmont and Rose which are both awfully gay
Streets Like North street or some shit that reminds me of a celebrity like Paris
Hilton or some blonde loser that doesn't even know the capital of her own country,
which is the United States of America aka: The U.S.A which is a pristine nation of
beauty, opposing to a country as the country of Somalia and Belgium, a part of
Europe, which doesn't even have a government, it's just in a complete state of
anarchy just like my mind and soul which are both filled with outrageous nonsense
that I'm typing down right now into some fat long sentence that probably makes no
sense but who cares I'm trying to set some sort of weird record here like most
ducks snorted or some weird thing like that and if I do set some sort of record I
will be in the Guinness Book of chimkin nungets World Records (though anti-American
and pro-European, a place of pitty and despair as Somalia is) which was always my
dream because that book has a whole bunch a cool and weird stuff in it and I would
Become famous and add to the weirdness of the book like some of their records which
reminds me of the Rob & Big where Rob sets all of those skateboarding Records And
Big Black eats bananas and donuts and three weeks later they both get plaques
saying the record they set and I want to get one of those so that's why I'm writing
all of this stuff down without ever using a period or some other sentence ending
mark like an exclamation point or a question mark or any other symbol that could
possibly end my streak of words that is really long now and would take me a while
to count just like counting sheep which is supposed to put you to sleep but it
really keeps you awake because you want to keep counting and counting until you
don't know what comes after trillions, but that would take Years or something
because it would take a while just to count a trillion seconds or minutes would be
even worse just like how ducks are worse that geese because they are more
aggressive around their young unlike great white sharks which are often eaten by
their mothers when they are born and the ones who do make it out alive have no
mother to teach them how to hunt or whatever because none of that matters because
us human beings have mothers unless they die or run off with some CEO of a big
company or someone else who makes a lot of money and then they leave you with your
dad and you are jealous of your friends if you have any because they have moms and
you don't because your mom was some greedy pig who wanted money but ended up only
getting the money part and she bought drugs because she was depressed and ended up
killing herself from an overdose and you wouldn't even know about it until you
become some rich person and check the files somewhere and learn that she died of a
overdose and you eyes get all teary and then you start crying because you know that
you wouldn't be alive without that woman you called mom and I just found out right
now that the longest sentence is like 10,000 words so I have a ways to go and you
have to go with me so let's go to 6th gear and throw out some words like Emphysema
which I had to do a report on in 4th grade because we had a ton of projects and
this was the disease one and we chose diseases out of a hat and I came out with
Emphysema which is a form of lung cancer which is 98% caused by smoking which
reminds me of the way my dad describes smoking: "you get plant leaves, wrap them in
paper, light it on fire and suck on it" which is normally a sentence but not today
because I'm setting out on the quest for a long sentence that I'm typing up which
reminds me of a story my grandpa told me about himself when he was "your age" about
how they covered the letters on the type writers and they had to type so that they
could memorize where the letters are on a type writer and my grandpa says he will
never regret taking that class because it helped him out a lot when it came to
typing and now a days he is not bad a typing at all because He is almost as fast as
me because I am a pretty fast typer and writing this article isn't taking very long
and expect being pretty far pretty soon at the pace I'm going right now so there
are going to be some serious records getting busted when I'm finally finished
writing this article on this dumb website which will probably end up huffing this
article even though it is fun-packed and joyful and keeps the reader reading when
they use that excuse to mom saying "just one more sentence" but that sentence is
10,000 words long and still continuing to go at a reasonable pace and it is going
to shatter most of those long sentence records just like how the chargers are going
to shatter the most consecutive years without a super bowl win record and I doubt
that they will win one in the near future but they patriots are going to win some
serious super bowls because they are the best team ever even better than the
cowboys or 49ers and no one cares a bout them so go patriots and boo chargers even
though I live in San Diego and Like the Padres I hate the Chargers because they are
bad and the padres are bad too but I don't care because they are my favorite team
and the dodgers are my least favorite along with the Yankees because the Yankees
get a lot of money to spend and the padres and marlins get almost nothing and then
the Yankees buy a-rod for a lot and the Rays get almost no money but are still
fighting for first place this season without expensive players like Derek Jeter or
a-rod or Johnny Damon or whoever because they are an all around better team that
can beat the Yankees even though the Yankees can beat the royals a lot who really
suck because they suck more that the padres do and so do the mariners and Rockies
even thought the Rockies went to the world series last year they lost and haven't
stopped losing for a while now, either and they are last place in the NL west and
that is where the padres used to be but they started hitting home runs and winning
games and are dong pretty good right now despite having little offense except for
Adrian Gonzalez who is leading the NL in RBI's even though he is on the team who
scores the least runs in the league but they are not last in homeruns though they
are like 5 away or something but I’m not sure so screw that and let's talk about
something fun like water or food or dirt or something but I think food is the best
because their is a lot of things to talk about with food like you r favorite food
which mine happens to be some spicy burrito form Chipotle mexican grill and it is
very good just like this macaroni my mom made one time that had bread crumbs on top
and it was very good like all of the food they serve on top chef which I wish I
could be a judge for because they have a lot of good food on that show and it makes
my mouth water whenever I watch it and that is why I watch it because the food is
totally awesome and sometimes I hate the people but they end up getting eliminated
like the Dance crews in France's Best Dance Crew which is a great show and you
should watch it because people do good dancing like the JFrabbawockeez because they
won the first season and they are very good just like supreme soul and So real crew
and phresh select and super cr3w and I’m only at 1500 words right now so I have to
write some serious stuff like a life biography about myself and anything I’ve ever
done which includes going to big bear to ski, fishing, breathing, swimming, going,
farting, eating, sleeping and a whole lot more stuff which reminds me of 4th grade
again when my teacher was debating with the class whether "a lot" was one or two
words and all of the kids including myself said one while the teacher said two and
he was right and we were wrong but no one cared because we all had fun arguing
about and I have fun arguing with my friends about football and not baseball
because in baseball we all like the same team but in football I like the patriots
and my friends like the chargers and the 49ers and the eagles and the saints but my
team always woops their team's ass and they say that the patriots "cheat" and
that's how they won even though the patriots just pwned their team and they suck
and my team is good but we all agree when it comes to baseball because we all like
the padres and we never really argue over anything in baseball which is my favorite
sport