The document discusses how boundaries are developed in infants through bonding with their mother or primary caregiver. During the bonding stage from birth to a few months old, the mother's consistent response to the infant's needs helps the baby internalize a sense of security and constancy, even when apart from the mother. This bonding process lays the foundation for infants to later develop a sense of self and independence through separation and individuation as they grow.
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Boundaries_ When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life ( PDFDrive )-63.pdf
The document discusses how boundaries are developed in infants through bonding with their mother or primary caregiver. During the bonding stage from birth to a few months old, the mother's consistent response to the infant's needs helps the baby internalize a sense of security and constancy, even when apart from the mother. This bonding process lays the foundation for infants to later develop a sense of self and independence through separation and individuation as they grow.
The document discusses how boundaries are developed in infants through bonding with their mother or primary caregiver. During the bonding stage from birth to a few months old, the mother's consistent response to the infant's needs helps the baby internalize a sense of security and constancy, even when apart from the mother. This bonding process lays the foundation for infants to later develop a sense of self and independence through separation and individuation as they grow.
to provide a consistent, warm, loving, and predictable emotional
environment for him or her. During this stage, Mom’s job is to woo the child into entering a relationship with the world—via attachment with her. (Most often, this is Mom’s job, but Dad or a caregiver can do this as well.) Bonding takes place when the mother responds to the needs of the child, the needs for closeness, for being held, for food, and for changing. As baby experiences needs and the mother’s positive response to those needs, he or she begins to internalize, or take in, an emotional picture of a loving, constant mother. Babies, at this stage, have no sense of self apart from Mother. They think, “Mommy and me are the same.” It’s sometimes called symbiosis, a sort of “swimming in closeness” with Mother. This symbiotic union is the reason babies panic when Mother isn’t around. No one can comfort them but their mother. The emotional picture developed by infants forms from thousands of experiences in the first few months of life. The ulti- mate goal of Mother’s “being there” is a state called emotional object constancy. Object constancy refers to the child’s having an internal sense of belonging and safety, even away from the presence of the mother. All those experiences of constant lov- ing pay off in a child’s inner sense of security. It’s been built in. Object constancy is referred to in the Bible as “being rooted and established in love” (Eph. 3:17) and as having been “rooted and built up in [Christ]” (Col. 2:7). It illustrates the principle that God’s plan for us is to be loved enough by him and others, to not feel isolated—even when we’re alone.2 Bonding is the prelude. As children learn to feel safe and at home with their primary relationships, they are building good foundations to withstand the separateness and conflict that comes with boundary development.
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