for love of the ocean

"tell me a story." she said as we sat there on the couch craddled in each others arms. "a story? you gotta be kidding me!" "come on!" she pleaded. "you're the writer. you should be able to make up a story for me." the candlelight flickered in her eyes as she peered up at me. "It's not that easy hon," I explained. "I don't know why everyone thinks it is. it's really a very difficult process. not something I can just break out at any given moment." she frowned a pitful frown. I sighed. "give me the bottle and I'll see what I can do." she jumped up happily grabbed the bottle and handed it to me. I took a swig off it and stared at the ceiling for a while. "well?" she said. "let's here it." "give me a minute, will ya?" I said irritatedly. "damn girl!" she smiled innocently and settled into me, waiting for the story to begin. "okay." I said, "here we go. there was a young, fair skinned man who went to the same beach every morning. he just stood there, staring out into the blue waves for hours. finally he'd turn and walk down the shoreline, stopping every so often to pick up a shell and put it to his ear. I asked him once what he was listening to, in that

shell. he told me he heard the world in there. and sometimes, if he listened very closely, he could hear his love's voice over the roar of the turning ocean. he had a faraway look in his eyes as he spoke. his eyes were out of place, standing out against his baby faced appearance. they were the eyes of an old man who had traveled the world, seen all it had to offer, fallen in love and lost that same love. he took the shell from his ear, held it close to his lips, and spoke so quietly into it that I couldn't hear him. then lifted the shell over his shoulder and heaved it as far as he could into the ocean. it landed with a splash and disappeared under the waves. I looked at him, wanting to know why he had done that, but something kept me from asking. he walked off, fading into the morning fog." I paused, lighting a cigarette more for affect than need. "go on." she prodded. I blew the smoke out and took another swig off the bottle. "a few weeks later, I saw him again at the same beach, watching the same water. I walked up to him. there was something different about his face. I couldn't put my finger on it, but he had changed somehow, grown older, looking more tired and worn than he did last time I saw him. he didn't look at me, just spoke to me from over

his shoulder. "don't think I can wait much longer." he said. "wait? wait for what? I asked. "for her." he solemnly spoke. "have you ever seen her, out there?" I shook my head no waiting for his explanation. "she's there. in the water. beneath the waves. she's beautiful." a smile covered his face at her memory. "her long blonde hair shimmering, floating in the water. holding her arms out to embrace me." then his face became more serious than I had ever seen. "she's been calling to me, since I was a teenager. ever since that day. the day her ship went down." he looked down at the sand for a moment, then continued. "we were to be married, my love and I, when she got here, to America. but the storm came, and the ocean swallowed her. I've walked the beach everyday since looking for a sign, any message from her. sometimes I think I can hear her voice in the sea shells, but its muffled, I can't make out what she's saying." I found myself wondering how old this boy was. he looked like he was barely 18, but the way he spoke and his eyes told a different story. he was much older. he began walking along the shoreline as the waves broke around his bare feet. he stopped suddenly, picked up a shell, put it to his ear and listened. then threw back down, disgustedly. I watched him picking up shells and throwing them back down until he disappeared

behind an rocky outcropping. something bothered me all day about his tale. it wasn't until I was home and the sky had changed from blue to black that I realized what it was that bothered me so. there hadn't been a shipwreck here of any signifigance in over a hundred years. the next morning I got up before the sun and went to the beach he always walked wanting desperately to see him once more. the beach was empty when I got there. the sun broke over the horizon but there was no sign of him. I was about to give up when all of a sudden he was there, standing right beside me at the water's edge. he looked at me, with sad eyes, the kind of sadness that few had ever known, but I was familiar with. the waves crashed around our feet then pulled back into the deep blue ocean. I looked down, and to my surprise there was a large shell laying at his feet. I pointed to it, unable to speak. his eyes followed my finger and he knelt down, picking up the shell. he held it to his ear and a smile curled on his lips. "it's her!" he said excitedly. "she wants me to join her!" he threw down the shell and ran into the waves screaming "I'm coming! I'm coming!"

I watched helplessly, frozen as he went deeper and deeper until the water was over his head and he disappeared beneath the churning waves. I could've sworn, for a moment, a saw something out there in the water. something with long waving hair and open arms welcoming him. I shook my head telling mtself you're seeing things old man. there's nothing there. when I looked back at the spot I thought I had seen something, there was nothing there. I chuckled to myself, you're losing your mind, my friend. I started to walk away when my foot struck something hard half buried in the sand. it was the shell he had dropped. cautiously I picked it up, turning it over in my hands as if it might explode at any second. I took it home with me, staring at it for hours as it sat on my coffee table, too afraid to pick it up and listen. I still have it. it sits in a place of honor on my shelf. I never have listened to it." "wow!" she said impressed. "that was cool!" she sat up and kissed me on the cheek. "thanks for my story! I can't you beleive you made that up just for me!" I smiled and looked at my watch. "sometimes I get lucky." was all I said in response. "it's getting late hon. I gotta get to bed." we got up and walked to the door making arrangements to get together

tomorrow night. we said goodbye and I closed the door. I walked over to the far wall and stared at a bone white shell with pock marks on it's surface. I picked it up and went back to the couch. sitting down with a thud I grabbed what was left of the bottle with my left hand, took a deep, long drink and lifted the shell to my ear, smiling in the darkness.......