Main Content

Archive of Our Own betaArchive of Our Own

Log In
Site Navigation

Fandoms
Browse
Search
About
Search Works

Work Search: tip: austen words:10000-50000 sort:title

Actions

Entire Work Next Chapter → Chapter Index Comments Hide Creator's Style Share
Download

Work Header

Rating:

Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning:

No Archive Warnings Apply

Category:

F/M

Fandoms:

EberronDungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)

Relationship:

Gaia Sotharr/Gath lich of Haldren's Tomb

Characters:

Gaia SotharrGath the Lich of Haldren's TombMerrix d'CannithLord of

BladesJarrot the ZombieAlufi Haskal d'SivisMeeps (Echoers)Trebolyn d'Sivis

Additional Tags:

LichZombiesBakery and Coffee ShopCozyCringe AFPaladinsUndeadWarforged

(Dungeons & Dragons)

Language:
English
Stats:
 Published:
2023-01-26
Updated:
2023-03-31
Words:
6,379
Chapters:
4/?
Kudos:
14
Bookmarks:
2
Hits:
85

I'm a Barista Who Has Vowed to Destroy All Evil, But My Shift Manager is a Horrible
Lich!
gLOVELESStago
Summary:

Gaia Sotharr, Faithful Paladin of the Church of the Silver Flame, works
diligently in a cafe called Halden's Carafe. Her vow to destroy all evils in this
world is complicated by the fact that the other shift manager at the Carafe is
Gath, a horrible lich and thorn in her side. A perfectly normal morning is ruined
by Gath's presence, however things feel more tense than usual.

Chapter 1: Status Quo

Chapter Text
Halden's Carafe
Gaia X Gath
Ch1: Status Quo

Gaia Sotharr tightens the light ice-blue apron around her waist, pulling her khaki-
visor into place around her braided fiery hair. She steps out from the employee
locker room to the kitchen of the cafe, looking around briefly. The kitchen of
Halden’s Carafe, Cliffside’s best history themed cafe, is dark and grey. It is the
crack of dawn, but she enjoys these silent moments to herself. It's better than
being surrounded by the other employees and guests while trying to get the most
important work of the day done.

“The flame purifies, the flame cleanses. The flame purifies, the flame cleanses.”
Gaia says her morning prayers as she begins to roll out dough and prep the pastries
for the day. Normally she prays during morning stretches, but she woke up late.

“Ouch. What have I said about spouting your Silver Flame nonsense at work?” A
hissing voice erupts from the entryway. Through furrowed brow and angered
expression Gaia looks to the voice’s owner. Gath. The other shift manager at
Halden’s Carafe. Sparse white hairs on his bald boney head are slicked back, paper-
skin pulled over old bones create small noises as he shifts his weight, and glowing
red orbs where eyes should be in sunken eye sockets look down over a deteriorating
nose at the Flamist woman

“I’m allowed to do them when I’m alone. I didn’t realize you were on the shift this
morning.” She says, quickly returning to her work, kneading a large mass of dough.
“Not that it matters, you could use some Silver Flame if you ask me.”

A crackling hissing laughter echoes in Gath’s chest. The lich removes his flowing
gold silk robe revealing a “Halden’s Carafe” T-shirt and khaki pants, along with
gold tattoos that look likes swaths of his papery skin were made of gold leaf.
Gath silently begins his own work, portioning dough for rolls, picking out the jams
for the day, and other assorted administrative work. Occasionally he glances up at
Gaia, watching her thick muscular arms work the bread dough and lift the heavy
trays. If he had a heart... it’d pound in his ears at the flex of her biceps.

What started it all was a single bead of sweat. Gaia was focusing on a sourdough
ball, kneading it to the perfect consistency. She didn’t notice a drop of sweat on
the tip of her nose. She didn’t hear Gath come up beside her. A soft black lacy
cloth pressed up against her face. Softly dabbing her cheeks and forehead. The
military-trained woman jumps back, floury doughy hands curled in defensive fists.

“You- you were sweating so bad I thought you were going to ruin the bread.” Gath
says, not intending the sarcasm and criticism in his dry undead voice. “Figured I’d
just stop you from complaining about having to make another batch all day.” He
buckles down, realizing that his actions could be seen as potentially kind.

Gaia stares at him before she begins to fume, face flushing red. “Yeah, well thanks
I guess. Hurry up with whatever you're doing and stop paying attention to what I’m
doing. Once you’re done standing with your hanky out, put the sweetbreads in the
display and set all the chairs down. The employees should be coming in soon to
open.” She barks orders as she typically does to the other employees before turning
back to her dough. Sandalwood and patchouli, what a wonderful scent.

“Welcome to Halden’s Carafe!” a businessman enters the cafe celebrating the hero of
the War of the Mark. It is easily seen on his face by Gaia that he finds the whole
place kitschy. “Party of one, sir?”

“Two... I’m meeting someone.” The privilege and disgust dripping from his voice as
he straightens his black suit, a greater dragonmark peaking out on his hand, and
blue embroidery matching the same dragonmark flowing up his arm.

“Of course sir, last question, ballroom or crypt?” Gaia asks, tilting her head and
gesturing to the differently themed dining rooms to her left and right. An
exasperated look from the guest told Gaia all she needed to, she gathered two menus
then began to walk him to the ballroom.

As they enter several of the staff, Gath’s zombies specifically, are turning the
chairs onto the tables and are mopping the marble floor. Gath, standing in a
supervisory role, looks at Gaia as she steps in. Putting a hand up, “sorry,
Ballroom’s closed,” he hisses.

Gaia looks at the room indignantly, “Where are all of the Ballroom staff?” Gaia
asks indignantly, irritation in her voice.

What could pass for a smile flashes on Gath’s face, “I think someone said something
about a cake break. The crypt employees are still available though.” He floats
above the wet floor and takes the menus from Gaia, “My apologies Lord d’Cannith,
right this way. The ballroom staff are always so flakey, please don’t let their
laziness reflect on the true heart and soul of our professional cafe.” The Flamic
woman hears Gath speaking to the Dragonmarked guest as he leads her own guest away
from her zone.

Fury burns within her, she returns to the pastry counter which doubles as the front
desk and angrily arranges tiny truffles and pies. Blood pumping in her ears. She
glares daggers at the zombie employees who quickly take the cleaning supplies out
of the ballroom. She throws even more daggers as the ballroom employees return from
the kitchen sheepishly. She didn’t blame them, she knew what had happened. Gath.
Gath happened.

Gath hums an ancient song as he brings back the last tray of dishes to the sinks in
the kitchen. He hums as he dumps the jelly and chocolate covered trays and coffee
stained cups into the vat of soapy water. He turns away to do some other cleaning
in the kitchen while it all soaks. He can hear Gaia in the front of the cafe,
putting all of the day’s pastries in boxes. He knew that after her shift she’d walk
twenty minutes to the orphanage down tower, or to the homeless shelter down in
Fallen if she got a cab, and give away the nearly-stale pastries. Ridiculous, he
could simply use a spell to keep them fresh longer, but she gets mad when he
suggests that.

The lich pulls out a notebook and begins writing the pastry orders for the next
day, waving goodbye to some of the other employees as they leave. The silence
surrounds him. A kitchen can be very much like a tomb. It was nice.

But silence can only last so long, and dishes won’t get clean by sitting in
standing water. Gath turns to the tub of hot soapy bubbles and plunges his hands in
reaching for a few plates to run through the industrial dishwasher. With a loud
screech he pulls his hands out from the water. They steam but not with heat, no.

“HOLY WATER?!”

The lich screeches one more time, reaching into the water, grasping for anything
that didn’t feel like a plate or cup. He feels something... triangular. Pulling it
out it is a silver arrowhead with a stylized flame embroidered on it--the holy
symbol of the Church of the Silver Flame. Gath curses and drains the sink. “Gaia-
damnit.” He whispers under his breath.

The tub is refilled with water, the Lich shift manager cursing under his breath the
whole time. He senses a stillness from the rest of the cafe which disturbs him.
Shaking off his paranoia he reaches into the tub.

Another screech pierces the evening air, followed by Gath discovering the
additional holy symbol tied to the pipe underneath the sink that feeds water to the
faucet. The holy pipe now constantly blessing any water which passes through it.

Gaia sets aside the tills and Khundarak bank notes before Gath rushes to the pastry
counter, hands blazing from their holy water exfoliation. He takes hold of her
shoulders, shocking her just a little, no matter, she knows she can take him in a
physical fight.

“I inconvenience you and you harm me? A GRAVE escalation Gaia.” Gath’s voice is
scratchy and wavering.

“Of course I escalated, you’re the one who makes my day to day consistently
difficult.” She spits back at him, straightening up into an aggressive position.

He pulls her closer. Patchouli and sandalwood. “Gaia. Do. Not. Ever. Make such an
escalation again.” he leans his head down toward her, “I couldn’t live with myself
for the things I’d have to do to you.”

Caught in the moment Gaia’s lips quiver, her face flushes, “yeah? L-like what?
Coward.”

Gath stops his momentum. He can’t. She can’t. This. CAN’T. He pushes the devout
woman away. “Things you could never recover from. Goodnight Sothaar, be careful
going home.” The final words the lich says ring like a threat in Gaia’s ears.

In the darkness of the closed cafe, Gaia touches her lips, “patchouli and
sandalwood huh?”
Actions

↑ Top Next Chapter →

Kudos

Darth_Socius, Dracolis, invertedtritone, DragonBlood472, booksbooks3, Gullwhacker,

CanuckofSpiral, and ZuzusSecrets as well as 6 guests left kudos on this work!
Comments

Sorry, this work doesn't allow non-Archive users to comment. You can however still
leave Kudos!
Footer

About the Archive

Site Map
Diversity Statement
Terms of Service
DMCA Policy
Contact Us
Policy Questions & Abuse Reports
Technical Support & Feedback
Development
otwarchive v0.9.340.5
Known Issues
GPL by the OTW