Names: Relacion, Anna Malou G.

Course/Year/Section/: BSN- 1Q

Oybenes, Princess

REFLECTION
1.) How would you describe the communication dynamics you observed and
learned from your parents growing up? What was the typical level and style of
communication? Was it safe to communicate your thoughts, feelings, and needs?
- Growing up, I noticed that my parents were a passive communicator. My
father's side of the family has been financially supporting us since I was
young. They gained power over our choice as a result, that anytime there is a
problem, we don't settle it as a family but instead weigh their viewpoint
first. My parents would frequently say, "Let's ask your lola about it," or
"Your lola could have something to say about this." This made me feel like I
am not heard. It gave me have a hard time expressing my thoughts, feelings,
and needs. I had the impression that I couldn't trust my parents in
understanding what I'm going through since they don't really consider their
own opinion, what more to mine?

2.) How comfortable are you communicating what you feel and what you need to
feel in your close relationships?
- If I confidently know that the person I am speaking to is listening, paying
attention, and empathizing with my sentiments, I believe that I am more
comfortable talking or communicating with them. Because for me, having
good communication depends a lot on listening. In this way, I could see that
the person I'm speaking to is actually listening to what I had to say.

3.) What is the difference between "I think" messages, and “I feel” messages? When
you begin by saying, "I feel LIKE." why is it helpful to stop the conversation,
and try again?
- Saying "I think" demonstrates objectivity, that you have given the matter
some thought and rationalize that idea or opinion. You get to weigh things
out, understand what situation you’re in and what the person you’re talking
to needs to hear. In contrast, when you say "I feel," you are expressing a
subjective opinion and that the basis of it is your emotions. Being emotional
is understandable but it’s not necessary. Our emotions can make us say
words that can be hurtful to someone and we might end up regretting it later.
It’s also best not to start a conversation with “I feel LIKE”, because this give
someone no certainty and would lead someone on.

4.) Anger looks like power when we feel scared and powerless, but fear is the
underlying emotion we are expressing when we react in anger. Do you tend to
use anger as a tool to help you feel powerful?
- Sometimes, there are instances when it's the only way I can stand my ground,
defend myself. I am aware that anger is a strong emotion and that, if not
controlled, it can be harmful to myself and the people around me. That’s why
oftentimes I tend to control my anger because I know that getting angry will
only make things worse, so I always try to manage my anger in order to avoid
chaos. Therefore we need to control our anger before it controls us.

5.) Where do you need to grow most in becoming an assertive communicator?

- In becoming an assertive communicator our relationship towards other
people will grow and develop. With assertive communication we get to have a
healthy relationship with others because it enable us to view each side of the
coin. We get to understand other’s perspectives which makes addressing the
problems and issues easier to talk about. This then makes our social life
healthier and the people around us happier.