Too much of expectation is disastrous for happiness

Believing, trusting, hoping and expecting too much leads to disappointment. Being realistic in
approach saves us from disaster and distress.

We often expect from others and create one sided demand to be fulfilled. If this is not achieved, we
develop either sadness around or spoil the beauty of the relations. Too much of everything is
harmful for our body and soul.

Having expectation is no harm but expecting in return and without an acceptance of the giver is a
deadly combination. We often get depressed when we expect certain desires to be fulfilled without
either giving efforts to it or without estimating the capability. Either it is from the self or from the
others. Many of us dream to become millionaires without estimating the sources we have and even
without giving the effort it requires and crib throughout our lives as deprived souls. We don’t realize
about those who are millionaires, how much effort they have given and the amount of struggle they
went through. Nothing comes without the cost and resources. We need to create the resources and
the direction to achieve the results.

We can’t expect to be loved by others unless we love others and pour constant efforts to be loved.
Often in our relationship we expect one sided result and thus brings sadness to our lives. We often
expect higher positions in our job without giving diligent efforts to contribute to the business. There
are hundreds of expectations which kill us if they are unfulfilled.

we need to raise wisely a few questions to ourselves.

        why expectations are painful in our life
        Can we live without expectation?
        How do we control our expectations?
        Which are practical ways to lower down the expectations?
        How to stop expecting from others. And
        Who is prone to expecting from others?

Why are expectations painful?

Expectations are painful if they are either too much or remain unfulfilled. We often feel happy when
we do not expect return but the moment the return is perceived one-sided, it gives pain as the
returned is pre-conceived and often without investments and efforts. This could be in a relationship
or in the business. You can’t expect to be a professional singer unless you have your assessment of
capability and the efforts to be invested. Comparison leads to greater pain if expected to be the
same of your opponent.

Wrong expectations are the major cause of distress. Parents expect their children to achieve highest
grades in school, a different career option than of the children’s desire which in most of the cases
bring sadness in our life and depression.

Expectation is a futuristic approach and we build several expectations in our life with hope to
achieve but the question is how realistic those are and how much effort are invested in it.

Can we live without expectation?

We are born with expectations right from when we are born. As a child several expectations we
build in and if we don’t get, we cry. As an adult we expect our parents fulfil all our desires without
realizing the capacity they have and we get depressed when we don’t get. As grown up men we
expect many things from our partners. All these expectations we build in our life one sided and
brings sadness.

Without seedlings and watering constantly, we can’t expect the growth in a plant and fruits. We all
need to realize the realistic future of the seedlings in our life. Expecting too much always has a
negative impact in our life.

But truly an expectation is the base of every growth and investment. Without expecting returns we
shall never invest in business, relationships and society.

How to control our false Expectations?

By realizing our own potential and putting ourselves in other’s shoes is the best way to control our
expectations. We start expecting from self without noticing the potential we possess, resulting in an
unfulfilled outcome and thus the victim of a deprived soul. Everyone has the different skills and
potential to perform and setting up the wrong goals leads to a wrong expectation.

We expect the returns from others without realizing the fact “what would have I done if in his
situation”. Actually we expect in other ways in return without going into the others’ situation and
builds a negative web of thoughts which leads to distress.

Lowering down the expectation is saviour

Comparison is the culprit of generating the expectation. Stop comparing yourself, your subordinates
in office, children at home, spouse in general. Expectation starts the moment you have comparison
with an object and that leads to an expectation. In society, we are governed by our surrounding and
assimilation process starts with similar kinds of people or objects.

Sometimes we start expecting results from ourselves with a big hope but without planning.
Expectation without the planning of success turns out to be failure in life and that brings
unhappiness, therefore meticulous planning for achieving the goal is the best way of setting up the
expectation.

Who is prone for unfulfilled expectations?

We all are short of setting up the right input and the result of wrong output is in our hand. A wrong
proposal in business will never be a result of bagging the deal. Bad input of behaviours will end up
with strained relationships between the friends and even in our family and then expecting a miracle
to happen is something puzzling.

At the end I would say, never ever set the expectations without investments. Investment in
relationship or job or self or in business is the paramount of