Transcript

ALADDIN: A MUSICAL SPECTACULAR

Transcribed by Kirsten Wahlquist
Please note this is only a transcript, not the original script! As such, any
errors are my own fault. Also, since the show's jokes rely heavily on improv, I
picked some of my favorite jokes for each of those lines.
Italics indicate singing.

(Lightning flashes and the NARRATOR enters stage right, along with a
man with a camel puppet)

NARRATOR
Oh, I come from a land
From a far away place
Where the caravan camels roam
Where it's flat and immense
And the heat is intense
It's barbaric, but hey, it's home
When the wind's from the east
And the sun's from the west
And the sand in the glass is right
Come on down, stop on by
Hop a carpet and fly
To another Arabian Night!
(sparkles fly out of her hand, the CAMEL exits stage left)

Ahhhh, salaam and good evening, weary travelers. Headed towards

Agrabah, are we? Well, let me help you pass the time with a tale. The desert
night hides a thousand stories!
(the stage behind her is revealed, showing JAFAR, IAGO, and PEASANT
at the entrance to the CAVE of WONDERS)

Ah, the Cave of Wonders. The setting of one of our most famous legends.
The tale of the magic lamp.
(the NARRATOR exits stage left)

CAVE
Who dares approach the Cave of Wonders? Only the diamond in the rough
may enter. All else will perish.

JAFAR: You are to fetch me that lamp. Now go!

(the PEASANT enters the Cave, which collapses on him)
PEASANT: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
IAGO: Oops.

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JAFAR: That's the third peasant this cave has eaten this week! How am I
ever to become sultan without that lamp?
IAGO: Lamp, lamp, lamp. How many peasants do we have to go through to
find that stupid lamp?
JAFAR: Patience, Iago. That peasant was obviously less than worthy.
IAGO: Now there's a big surprise! I think I'm gonna have a heart attack from
not surprise –
JAFAR: (grabs IAGO'S neck) Silence!
IAGO: Choking… bird…choking…
JAFAR: We have to find that diamond in the rough. Now where could he
possibly be?
(JAFAR and IAGO exit stage right, passing ALADDIN as he runs across
from stage right to stage left, pursued by the GUARDS.)

GUARD: Halt you worthless street rat!

ALADDIN: That's MR. Worthless Street Rat to you!
MALE CITIZEN: That boy has been stealing my apples again!
MALE CITIZEN: He's a public menace!
ALADDIN: (appears in a window) Uh, guys, let's not do anything drastic,
okay? I mean, you wouldn't attack a guy just for stealing one measly piece of
fruit, now, would you? (the GUARDS draw their swords) … I'll take that as a
yes. (tosses an apple down to the guards) Here, take it back! I didn't want
it anyway!

MALE CITIZEN: Hey! He's getting away!

FEMALE CITIZEN: That boy is such a nuisance!
FEMALE CITIZEN: They should put him in the royal dungeon and throw away
the key!
MALE CITIZEN: Somebody stop him!!
(the curtain rises to reveal the Agrabah marketplace. ALADDIN runs
onstage from stage left, ducking behind the buildings. As he begins to
sing, everyone else freezes)

ALADDIN: Gotta keep

One jump ahead of the bread line
One swing ahead of the sword
I steal only what I can't afford
And that's everything!
(everyone resumes motion, and ALADDIN jumps onto a cart)
One jump ahead of the lawmen
That's all, and that's no joke
These guys don't appreciate I'm broke
(ALADDIN jumps off the cart and steals bread from a FEMALE CITIZEN)
FEMALE CITIZEN: Riff raff!

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GUARD: Street rat!
CITIZEN: Scoundrel!
(the HEAD GUARD stops ALADDIN, pushes him to the ground)
HEAD GUARD: Take that!
ALADDIN: Just a little snack, guys!

(ALADDIN dodges the GUARDS' swords, then ducks behind a group of

girls)

CROWD: Rip him open take it back guys!

ALADDIN: I can take a hint, gotta face the facts I could use a friend or two
GIRLS :True! Oh it's sad, Aladdin's hit the bottom He's become a one man
rise in crime

(ALADDIN, behind a BELLY DANCER, compliments her movements to

hide)

WOMAN: I'd blame parents except he hasn't got em

ALADDIN: (jumps from behind the BELLY DANCER, and the crowd spots
him) Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat Tell you all about it when I got the
time. (ALADDIN crawls through the crowd on hands and knees as they
look for him). One jump ahead of the slow pokes. One skip ahead of my
doom. Next time, gonna use a nom de plume
(ALADDIN grabs a feather from a basket)
One jump ahead of the hitmen
One hit ahead of the flock

GUARD: (spots ALADDIN) Hey!

ALADDIN: I think I'll take a stroll around the block (ducks behind a building)
CITIZEN: Stop thief!
CITIZEN: Vandal!
CITIZEN: Outrage!
GIRLS: Scandal!
(ALADDIN, carried by GUARDS, is brought from behind the building)
ALADDIN: Let's not be too hasty
GIRLS: Still I think he's rather tasty
(the GUARDS push ALADDIN to the ground and the HEAD GUARD
raises his sword)
ALADDIN: Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat, Otherwise we'd get along

(the GIRLS pass a basket along, and the last one places it over the
HEAD GUARD's head, allowing ALADDIN to duck away)

CROWD: Wrong!

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(as ALADDIN hides, the HEAD GUARD tries to get the basket off his
head, finally succeeding)

CROWD: One jump ahead of the hoofbeats!

(ALADDIN runs across the stage, almost into the HEAD GUARD's sword)
HEAD GUARD: Vandal!
ALADDIN: Gotta face the facts!

CROWD: One hop ahead of the hump!

(ALADDIN ducks another direction and runs into another GUARD)
GUARD: Street rat!
ALADDIN: Gotta eat to live!
CROWD: One trick ahead of disaster!
(ALADDIN ducks the third GUARD'S sword)
GUARD: Scoundrel!
ALADDIN: Gotta steal to eat!
CROWD: They're quick
ALADDIN: But I'm much faster. Here goes
(exits stage right and returns moments later)
Better throw my hand in
Wish me happy landing
(flies across the stage with the CROWD in pursuit, and they exit stage
left)
All I gotta do is jump!
(ALADDIN appears from behind a building in the center of the stage,
then runs into JASMINE as he starts to jog away)
Oh, sorry about that… (JASMINE continues on her way) on second
thought, maybe I'm not! Maybe it was an act of fate! (he ducks behind the
buildings to get in front of JASMINE, stealing an apple along the way)

JASMINE: (to a SELLER) Oh… no thank you…

ALADDIN: (holding out the apple to JASMINE) Hungry?
JASMINE:(walking away) You stole that, no doubt.
ALADDIN: (chases after her, stops her, and offers the apple again) Well,
the way the sultan taxes his people, we have no choice but to steal.
JASMINE:And do you always give away your stolen goods?
ALADDIN:Only to the less fortunate… or in your case, the more beautiful!
(JASMINE starts to walk away again) You can't escape on an empty
stomach!
JASMINE: (turning around) What makes you think I'm trying to escape from
something?…(ALADDIN gestures at her disguise) Is it that obvious?
ALADDIN: Look, these streets can be dangerous. You'll need a guide.
What's the matter? Don't you trust me?
JASMINE: (takes the apple) You're very kind.

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ALADDIN: The name's Aladdin, but most people call me –
GUARD: Street rat!
ALADDIN: That too! Come on!
(they try to run, but are grabbed by the GUARDS)
GUARD: There's no sense in running, boy, we've got you surrounded!
GUARD: (takes the apple from JASMINE) And it looks like he's got an
accomplice!
ALADDIN: Hey! Leave her out of this! She didn't do anything! It was my
fault! She's innocent –
GUARD: Silence street rat!
JASMINE: Unhand me this instant! (she is thrown roughly to the ground)
And stop calling him street rat, he's a person just like you or me!
GUARD: Well, listen to the little vagabond! The way she's ordering us
around, you'd think she were the princess of Agrabah herself! (the CROWD
laughs)
JASMINE: (pulls away the cloth covering her head to reveal a crown) I
am the princess of Agrabah! (the CROWD and GUARDS fall to the ground
and bow. ALADDIN, stunned, falls a moment later) And I demand that you
set this poor peasant boy free immediately, or I shall report all of you to the
sultan.
GUARD: A hundred apologies, your majesty, but we were only following the
laws.

HEAD GUARD: And with all due respect, it is your father who makes the laws,
not you… uh, your highness.

ALADDIN: It's all right, princess. I appreciate the effort.

JASMINE: (to the HEAD GUARD) You are to do nothing with him until I
speak with my father. (to ALADDIN) Don't worry, this will all be resolved
before any harm comes to you…(she goes to leave, but the GUARDS are still
in the way) you're in my way.

HEAD GUARD: (jumps aside) A thousand pardons… your majesty!

(JASMINE exits stage left)

CROWD: (laughs at the guards)

GUARD: Clear out of here! (the GUARDS grab ALADDIN)
HEAD GUARD: You may think you have friends in high places, boy, but no
matter what the princess says, we're free to handle criminals as we see fit…
right here on the street! (he draws his sword)

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JAFAR: (entering from stage right, disguised as an old man) Stop
everything! Stop everything! There you are, my boy. Your mother and I have
been so worried about you! (he pulls ALADDIN away from the guards)
ALADDIN: And you would be…?
JAFAR: Play along, boy, unless you want to sleep with the prison mice
tonight, or worse. (to the GUARDS) I'm the boy's father.
ALADDIN: Right! He's the boy's father!… wait… I'm the boy, he's the father…
JAFAR: He's always getting into trouble, this one. But he's a good boy. He
has a true heart and a noble spirit. You might almost call him a diamond in
the rough. Whatever it is he's stolen, I'm sure this will more than repay the
debt. (he tosses a bag of coins to a GUARD) You'll notice a few extra gold
coins there for all your hard work.

HEAD GUARD: (grabs the bag of coins) Well, seeing as the debt has been
repaid – and then some – you're free to go. Just don't let us catch you ever
again!

ALADDIN: Believe me, that's the plan, (the GUARDS start to jump at him,
but JAFAR holds up a hand, and the GUARDS exit stage left)

JAFAR: Well, that was almost too easy.

ALADDIN: Why'd you help me out like that?

JAFAR: Oh, just compassionate, I guess. Of course, one good deed

deserves another.

ALADDIN: I had a feeling there was a catch.

(JAFAR shoves ALADDIN, and the background reveals the Cave of
Wonders)

CAVE: Who dares approach the Cave of Wonders? Only the diamond in the
rough may enter. All else will perish.

ALADDIN: (approaching the Cave) I don't like those odds. (turns to leave,
is stopped by JAFAR)

JAFAR: Not to worry, Aladdin. I've consulted an ancient oracle. You are the
diamond in the rough. (ALADDIN moves toward the Cave again)

IAGO:Yeah! Move it or lose it, Diamond Boy!

ALADDIN: I've changed my mind about this! (he tries to run away, but is
stopped by JAFAR)

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JAFAR: Go! Or I shall return you to the palace guards!

ALADDIN: But –

JAFAR: Go now! There is no time to waste. And whatever you do, only touch
the lamp.

ALADDIN: Well, here goes nothing. (he ducks into the Cave and diappears)
IAGO: He's inside, your foulness! (the backdrop changes to the dark Cave)
JAFAR: It's only a matter of minutes now before all of Agrabah will be calling
me Sultan Jafar…remember, only touch the lamp!

(ALADDIN appears high up, walking slowly into the Cave)

ALADDIN: Only touch the lamp, got it! Only touch the lamp. Only touch the
lamp. Hello? Is anybody down there? Oh, it sure is dark in here. How did I
get myself into this mess? I'm not so sure this is any better than the royal
dungeon. All right Aladdin, don't panic. Just get down there, grab the lamp,
give it to the old geezer, and call it a night. One jump ahead of the lawmen,
one swing ahead of the sword… better throw my hand in, wish me
happy landin'! (he exits stage right, and reappears moments later) What
was that?? One trick ahead of disaster, on skip ahead of my doom…
Hello??… (the backdrop rises to reveal a treasure room) Whoa… only
touch the lamp… only touch the lamp… only touch – (spotting the lamp) the
lamp! (he climbs up to grab the lamp, and knocks over a piece of
treaure. CARPET jumps up) I can assure you Mr. Cave of Wonders
person, that was just an accident!

(the treasure falls away, and ALADDIN quickly grabs the lamp and ducks
a cave-in, setting the lamp on the ground downstage. CARPET also
escapes the cave-in)
Oh great, just great! Now how am I supposed to get out of here? Oh, this
isn't fair! Hey, somebody! Somebody help me plea –
(he comes face-to-rug with CARPET, and jumps back)
WHOA! Hey… you trying to get out of here too? (CARPET nods) I know
how you feel. The name's Aladdin…(he shakes CARPET's tassel) Well,
this way looks blocked. Got any other ideas? (CARPET gets excited and
moves toward the lamp downstage) What's that, you see something? Oh,
yeah. All that work for this measly piece of junk.
(CARPET mimes rubbing the lamp) What's that?
(CARPET mimes it again) I'm sorry, I don't understand what you're trying to
say. (to the audience) Does anyone out there speak Carpet? (the
audience responds) What? Rub the lamp? Okay…what good is that gonna

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do? (he rubs the lamp, and GENIE billows high into the air and reappears
onstage in a plume of smoke)

GENIE: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Genie!! Wow, thanks kid, you have no

idea what it's like being trapped inside that lamp for the last 10,000 years, 22
hours, and 53 seconds. I have the world's worst wedgie. (noticing his gut)
Whoa! Shades of Jiminy Glick! How'd
that get there? (to ALADDIN) Come on be honest, do I have lamp odor?

ALADDIN: Who are you?

GENIE: I used to be Mr. Clean before I won a breath holding contest… I'm a
Genie! And you know what that means? You've got three, count 'em 3, really
groovy wishes coming your way, baby. Oh, behave.

ALADDIN: I do?
GENIE: Yeah, but before we get started, let's go over the rule book, sport.
Let's see… "How to Keep Your Puffy Pants Puffy" by MC Hammer…"Men Are
from Mars, Genies are from Lamps"… "Harry Potter," "Harry Potter," "Harry
Potter" – I'm a big fan. Ah, here we go! "Genie Rule Book"! Rule number
one! No wishin' for more wishes! It's against Genie labor laws, and you don't
wanna cross that picket line, even to go to the grocery store. Rule number
two! I can't make someone fall in love with you. I did that once for Britney
Spears. Apparently the magic only lasts 55 hours. Rule number three! I can't
raise the dead. I did that for Ben Affleck, then he went and made that movie
Gigli. Two words – poooooo tinky!

ALADDIN: Let me get this straight. You're my genie? And I'm your master?
GENIE: No. But I did just save a ton of money on my car insurance… Yup!
That's what we genies do. It's ALL we do. Oh, sure, it sounds like a
glamorous gig, but you gotta spend your whole life trapped inside that teeny
lamp, doling out wish after wish, no real freedom of your own. But hey! What
am I talkin' about me for? This is your lucky day, son – not mine. And you
have no idea what's in store, friend! Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves
Sheherazadie had a thousand tales But master you in luck Cause up your
sleeves You got a brand of magic never fails You got some power in your
corner now Some heavy ammunition in your camp You got some punch,
pizzazz, yahoo and how See all you gotta do is rub the lamp And I'll say
(CARPET brings out a small table with a covered dish) Mr. Aladdin sir, what
will your pleasure be (GENIE grabs a notepad and writes)
Let me take your order, jot it down You ain't never had a friend like me
No no no (GENIE puts on a suit jacket that CARPET holds out)
Life is your restaurant and I'm your maitre'd
Come on whisper what it is you want
You ain't never had a friend like me

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Yes sir we
(GENIE lifts the lid on the dish to reveal a GENIE HEAD)

GENIE HEAD: Pride ourselves on service

You're the boss the king the shah
Say what you wish, it's yours, true dish
How 'bout a

GENIE HEAD AND GENIE: Little more baklava!

(GENIE re-covers the dish and grabs a menu)

GENIE: Have some of column A

Try all of column B
(slaps the menu shut and sets it down)
I'm in the mood to help you dude!
You ain't never had a friend like me!
(GENIE pushes ALADDIN downstage, where ALADDIN sits, then GENIE
"throws his voice" to CARPET)
Can your friends do this?
(a GENIE pops up in a puff of smoke)
Can your friends do that?
(another GENIE flips onto the stage from stage right)
Can your friends pull this
(GENIE pulls flowers out of a hat and hands them to CARPET)
Outta their little hat?
Can your friends go poof?
Well, lookie here
Can your friends go abracadabra
Let 'er rip!
Then make the sucker disappear!
(CARPET disappears in a puff of smoke)
And that's just the appetizer!
(the rockslide rises to reveal a whole chorus of GENIES on a Vegas-like
set, ALADDIN jumps up)

GENIE CHORUS
So don't just sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed
I'm here to answer all your mid-day prayers
You got me bona fide certified
You got a genie for your charge d'affaires!
I got powerful urge to help you out
So what you wish, I really wanna know
(the GENIES pick up ALADDIN)
You got a list that's three miles long no doubt

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Well all you gotta do is rub like so
(GENIE rubs the lamp ALADDIN holds out, then the GENIE CHORUS sets
ALADDIN down and runs offstage) And oh!
(a few GENIES breakdance, then run offstage, leaving ALADDIN and
CARPET. The GENIES, led by GENIE, appear at the top of the staircase,
hats and canes in hand)

GENIE: Give it up for the genies!

(GENIE and the GENIE CHORUS do a kickline down the stairs)

GENIE/GENIE CHORUS
Mr. Aladdin sir, what will your pleasure be
Let me take your order, jot it down
Come on whisper what it is you want

(GENIE brings ALADDIN to stand next to him, they dance)

GENIE: Let's kick it, kid!

GENIE/GENIE CHORUS
Mr. Aladdn sir, have a wish or two or three
I'm on the job, you big nabob
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend

ALADDIN, GENIE, AND CHORUS

You ain't never had a friend like me

GENIE CHORUS
Oh yeah
Wah wah wah
Oh my
Wah wah wah
Oh yeah

GENIE: You ain't never had a friend like me

ALL: Hah!

(ALL strike a final pose, and the lights go out)

(IAGO appears in a window and waves at the audience, disappearing as

JAFAR and JASMINE enter stage right)

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JAFAR: I'm sorry, princess, but I know all about your little plan to help some
poor street urchin, but rules are rules!

JASMINE: But he was only trying to feed himself –

JAFAR: Uh-uh-uh! We can't go changing our laws every time the princess
gets a whim! What kind of example would that set?

(IAGO enters stage left)

JASMINE: But the boy! What have you done with him? He deserves a fair
trial!

JAFAR: I'm sorry to say, but the boy has already been… how to put it…?
IAGO: Eaten by a giant cave, shaped like a tiger's head! Remember? He
didn't wanna go but you shooooved him in-

JAFAR: The boy has been… disposed of. Regulations are quite clear on the
matter.

JASMINE: But he only meant to help -

JAFAR: You have more important issues to concern yourself with, such as
your royal lineage. (he moves very close to JASMINE)
(the SULTAN enters from stage right as a fanfare plays, JASMINE runs
to him)

JASMINE: Father!

JAFAR: Aaaah, your highness! The princess and I were just discussing her
upcoming marriage! Everything is in order – the feast, the festival… the only
thing we seem to be lacking is…the groom!

SULTAN: Yes, Jasmine, you must make a decision and quickly. The people
of Agrabah cannot wait forever for their new sultan. I promised them you
would marry the next eligible suitor who seeks your hand.

JASMINE: But they're all egotistical braggarts!

JAFAR: Princess, with all due respect, we can't just sit around and wait for
someone to burst into the palace, blow a trumpet, and announce that they've
found the love of your life-
(a trumpet blows and the curtain rises to reveal GENIE)

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GENIE: Preeeeesenting Prince Ali Ababwa, the love of Princess Jasmine's
life! (the theater doors on the stage left side of the theater open and
ALADDIN enters on an elephant, with an entourage. They make a loop
through the orchestra level of the theater) Oh, I can see
him right now, the paparazzi is going crazy…

CROWD: Make way for Prince Ali

Say hey, it's Prince Ali

CROWD/GENIE
Hey, clear the way in the old bazaar
Hey you, let us through
It's a bright new star
Oh come be the first on your block to meet his eye
Make way, here he comes
Ring bells, bang the drums
Are you gonna love this guy!
Prince Ali, mighty is he, Ali Ababwa
Strong as ten regular men, definitely
He faced the galloping hordes
A hundred bad guys with swords
Who sent those goons to their lords?
Why, Prince Ali!

CROWD: He's got 75 golden camels

GENIE: Watch where you step!
CROWD: Purple peacocks he's got 53
GENIE: And they couldn't be prouder!
CROWD: When it comes to exotic-type mammals
GENIE: My mammal!
CROWD: Has he got a zoo
I'm telling you, It's a world-class menagerie!
Prince Ali
(the elephant stops next to the stage, and ALADDIN jumps off, the
elephant exits)

CROWD/GENIE
Prince Ali, fabulous he, Ali Ababwa
Heard your princess was a sight lovely to see
And that, good people, is why
He got dolled up and dropped by

CROWD
With sixty elephants, llamas galore

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With his bears and lions
A brass band and more
With his forty fakirs, his cooks, his bakers
His birds that warble on key
Make way…

CROWD/GENIE
… for Prince Ali!

ALADDIN: Fair princess, might I introduce myself? I am called Prince Ali

Ababwa! (GENIE mimes twirling a cape) Oh. (ALADDIN twirls his cape
and strikes a proud pose, then moves to kneel before JASMINE) And I
would be delighted to ask for your hand in marriage.

GENIE: (to JASMINE) Well? Don't keep the home viewers in suspense!
What do you think of his fabulousness?

JASMINE: Another fraud! (she storms off)

CROWD: (gasps, then disperses, leaving SULTAN, GENIE, ALADDIN,

and CARPET alone, but IAGO and JAFAR are secretly watching from a
window stage right)

GENIE: Wait a minute. He never worked for Enron!… where are you all
going? There's gonna be sandwiches…
SULTAN: I'm sorry, Prince Ali. My daughter seems to be a bit selective when
it comes to suitors. (he exits)

ALADDIN: Is it something I said?

GENIE: Maybe the parade approach was a little too…Vegas. Thank you vera
much. You know, Al, maybe you need to speak to the princess alone.

ALADDIN: You're right! Of course! You know, Genie, you've been such a
great help, you deserve something in return.
GENIE: Naaaaaaaaaw.
ALADDIN: No! Once I get the princess to fall in love with me, I'll use my last
wish to set you free! I promise.

GENIE: You mean it? Me? Free? Oh, Al, think what this will mean for the
emancipation of genies everywhere! Now, Al, you need to go speak to the
lovely princess alone. And whatever you do, be yourself. It's what's inside
that counts.

ALADDIN: Well, she certainly isn't going to fall for some street rat.

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GENIE: Oh, Al, you can't think of yourself as a street rat-
ALADDIN: Wait, Genie, I know what I'm doing! Come on, Carpet! (he grabs
CARPET, and they exit)
GENIE: Wait – no – wait for me… beeeeee yourseeeeeeeelf! (beat, then to
the audience) I'm gonna go find Nemo. (exits stage left)
JAFAR: Ooooooh, a genie? The street rat must have found the lamp, and
now he's passing himself off as this Prince A-blah-blah person.
IAGO: But he shoulda been trapped in the Cave of Wonders!
JAFAR: Well, we might have to do some trapping of our own. (they laugh
evilly, then disappear)

(the curtain rises on the stage to reveal JASMINE standing in her room,
with a bird cage off to one side)

JASMINE: Is this to be my fate? Forced to marry someone who doesn't even

know me. But what other choice do I have? Lucky bird inside a gilded cage
Golden words spoke by an ancient sage Everything you may have in life
Still all you hold is dust,
Must I yearn forever to be free
Free to climb a tree and ponder
Free to wander
There's no desire I hold fonder
Than to be
Simply me
To be free
How ungrateful is this lucky bird
Spurning privilege for one simple word
Freedom to stretch these golden wings
Freedom to touch the sky
Why, some would ask
Would she want to be
Free to throw away a treasure
Poor with pleasure
I'd sacrifice riches beyond measure
Just a girl
With a boy
What a perfect fantasy
To find love
To feel joy
To be really free

(ALADDIN rises up on the other side of her balcony)

ALADDIN: Excuse me princess? I didn't mean to intrude –

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JASMINE: (ducks behind the bird cage) Who granted you permission to my
private quarters? (runs toward stage right) Guards! Guards!
ALADDIN: (jumps in front of her and stops her) Nonononononono! I only
wanted to talk-
JASMINE: You're just like all the rest! You show up with your imperial
menagerie and expect me to go weak in the knees! Well, let me tell you
something Prince Ali. My hand, as well as my kingdom, can't be bought by
some second rate royal. You're only here to increase your personal wealth
and property.

ALADDIN: That's not why I'm here.

JASMINE: I suppose you're here because you're in love with me? Well, if you
expect me to believe that… you can take a flying leap off my parapet for all I
care.

ALADDIN: (looks down dejectedly, then notices CARPET waving

frantically from the far side of the balcony) Oh, okay! (to JASMINE) Very
well, as you wish. (he goes to the edge and steps off the balcony)

JASMINE: Ali!!
(ALADDIN pops up)

ALADDIN: You called? (he steps back onto the balcony)

JASMINE: How did you do that…?
ALADDIN: You were worried about me!
JASMINE: No…
ALADDIN: Come on, how about a little spin on the ol' carpet? Please
princess? I don't care about your wealth or your kingdom. I only ask for the
chance to get to know you a little better. What's wrong, don't you trust me?
JASMINE: Are you sure I don't know you?
ALADDIN: Uhhhhhh, your carpet awaits! Come on! (he takes her by the
hand and leads her to the carpet, they disappear)

(above the audience, the carpet lowers down, with ALADDIN and
JASMINE on it, and soars around. Dancers with models of famous
landmarks fill the stage)

ALADDIN: I can show you the world

Shining, shimmering, splendid
Tell me princess, now when did you last
Let your heart decide?
I can open your eyes
Take you wonder by wonder

15
Over, sideways, and under
On a magic carpet ride
A whole new world
A new fantastic point of view
No one to tell us no
Or where to go
Or say we're only dreaming

JASMINE: A whole new world, A dazzling place I never knew, But when I'm
way up here, It's crystal clear, That now I'm in a whole new world with you

(the carpet soars out of view, and ALADDIN and JASMINE reappear on
the carpet onstage)

ALADDIN: Now I'm in a whole new world with you

JASMINE: Unbelievable sights, Indescribable feelings, Soaring, tumbling,
freewheeling. Through an endless diamond sky, A whole new world
ALADDIN: Don't you dare close your eyes

(ALADDIN and JASMINE step off the carpet)

JASMINE: A hundred thousand things to see

ALADDIN: Hold your breath it gets better
JASMINE: I'm like a shooting star, I've come so far, I can't go back to where I
used to be
ALADDIN: A whole new world
JASMINE: Every turn a surprise
ALADDIN: With new horizons to pursue
JASMINE: Every moment red letter
ALADDIN AND JASMINE: I'll chase them anywhere, There's time to spare,
Let me share this whole new world with you
ALADDIN: A whole new world
JASMINE: A whole new world
ALADDIN: That's where we'll be
JASMINE: That's where we'll be
ALADDIN: A thrilling chase
JASMINE: A wondrous place
ALADDIN AND JASMINE: For you and me
(they kiss)

JASMINE: Goodnight, Prince Ali!

ALADDIN: Wait! Where are you going?
JASMINE: I have to speak with my father about something very important.
(she exits stage left)

16
ALADDIN: Goodnight… princess…
(CARPET appears in the background, exhausted. GENIE enters from
stage left)
GENIE: Well, how did it go with her majesty?
ALADDIN: She's perfect!
GENIE: Great! You like her, she likes you, now it's time for my wish!
ALADDIN: Is it?
GENIE: He doesn't remember the promise he made us, does he,
preciousssssssssssssss? First I freed you from the cave, big dance number
with hats and canes, that was wish number one. Then I turned you into fancy-
shmancy prince-type person – 36 people and an elephant suit – that was wish
number two. Now all that's left is wish number three, which means it's Genie
freein' time! Hit me with the digits!
ALADDIN: But Jasmine thinks I'm this big important Prince Ali guy. How am I
supposed to keep fooling her without you around?
GENIE: I thought we had a deal.
ALADDIN: I know we did. But I might still need that final wish.
GENIE: Sure. I understand. You're just like all the rest. I don't understand
why I let myself get all excited. I guess I thought you might be the kind of
person that actually kept your
promises.

ALADDIN: Genie –
GENIE: Ah ah ah ah ah!
ALADDIN: But –
GENIE: Ah ah ah ah ah!… You better talk to the left hand, cause you ain't
right!… Don't you worry about me, Al. If you need me, master, you know
where I'll be. Trapped, inside my sardine can. (he disappears in a puff of
smoke)

ALADDIN: (to the lamp) Come on, Genie, you gotta understand where I'm
coming from! (CARPET starts to leave) Wait, where are you going? You're
not mad at me too, are you? (CARPET makes an upset gesture, then exits
stage left) Oh, I don't know what I'm doing anymore!

(JAFAR enters stage right with the GUARDS and IAGO)

JAFAR: I'll say! Seize him!

(IAGO grabs the lamp from ALADDIN and gives it to JAFAR. The
GUARDS grab ALADDIN and put him in chains)

JAFAR: (to the GUARDS) Bring me the sultan! (two GUARDS exit) At last,
the kingdom will be mine! (he rubs the lamp)

17
GENIE: Look Al, if you're here to apologize, you're too late. But as long as
I've got you here, could you scrub my left shoulderblade? It gets so cramped
in here – EEEK! A man!

JAFAR: I believe you owe me three wishes.

ALADDIN: Don't do it, Genie!

GENIE: I got no choice, Al.
IAGO: Whoever holds the lamp controls the genie. It's in the genie rule book!

(the GUARDS enter with JASMINE and the SULTAN)

JASMINE: Let us go! (the GUARDS throw them to the ground) How dare you
treat the sultan this way?
SULTAN: Jafar!
JASMINE: He's hypnotized the palace guards.
ALADDIN: I'm afraid we've got even bigger problems than the palace guards.
JASMINE: What do you mean?
JAFAR: Everybody who's got three wishes coming, raise their hand. (beat,
then he raises his hand) Oops, looks like it's only me! Genie! For my first
wish, I wish to rule the kingdom! Make me the sultan.

(GENIE grants the wish. The SULTAN clutches his chest)

GENIE: Poof. You're the sultan. We're all very impressed… if your last name
was Peppershaker, you'd be Sultan Peppershaker. Nawwwww, you look
good up close… you'd look better from Jafar… Look at me, I'm in-SULTAN
him! Are we through yet?
JAFAR : No! We're just getting started! But perhaps merely being the sultan
isn't enough. For my second wish, I want you to make me the most powerful
sorcerer on Earth! (GENIE grants his wish, and JAFAR uses his staff to
force JASMINE to come to him) How do you like your sultan now, my little
desert blossom? Together we shall be unstoppable!
ALADDIN: Leave her alone! She doesn't love you and she never will –

(JAFAR uses his power to knock ALADDIN to the ground)

JAFAR: You stay out of this, street rat!

JASMINE: (going to ALADDIN) Street rat? But I thought you were Prince
Ali.
ALADDIN: I meant to tell you sooner or later.
JAFAR: Prince Ali, yes it is he
But not as you know him
Read my lips

18
And come to grips
With reality
Yes meet a blast from your past
Whose lies were too good to last
Say hello to your precious Prince Ali
(JASMINE runs to her father)
So Ali turns out to be merely Aladdin
Just a con, need I go on?
Take it from me
His personality flaws
Give me adequate cause
(the GUARDS pull ALADDIN's hands over his head)
To send him packing on a one-way trip
So his prospects take a terminal dip
His assets frozen, the venue chosen
Is the ends of the Earth, whoopee!
So long, ex-Prince Ali!
But how to eliminate him?

IAGO: (mutters unintelligibly)

JAFAR: Ahhhh, yes! There's only one way to get rid of a street rat! (he
moves to stand behind ALADDIN, holds up his snake staff, and
vanishes)
JASMINE: Where'd he go?
(a large snake JAFAR rises up downstage)

JAFAR: You're done for, now, street rat. Time to bid this world goodbye.
He's no match for the most powerful sorcerer on the planet!
(ALADDIN escapes the GUARDS)
ALADDIN: Why, you're not so powerful! The Genie has more power than
you'll ever have!
JASMINE: What are you doing?
ALADDIN: (to JASMINE) Trust me! (to JAFAR) The Genie gave you your
powers, he can take them away!
JAFAR: He's right. For my third and final wish, I want you to make me an all-
powerful Genie!

GENIE: Now you've gone and done it, Al! Whatever you say, snake boy! (he
grants the wish)

JAFAR: Yes! Yes! I can feel the power coursing through my veins! Aladdin,
prepare to meet your doom! (ALADDIN holds up the lamp, and JAFAR
slowly sinks away) Wha…what's happening? Aaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
(everything is returned to normal)

19
ALADDIN: You see, the only problem with being a genie is you got no
freedom. Isn't that right, buddy?
GENIE: Oh, Al, you're a GENIE-ous. Ten thousand years in the Cave of
Wonders ought to do him a world of good. Please stand clear of the doors.
Por favor mantengase alejado de las puertas. And as for the talkin' poultry…
(IAGO approaches)
IAGO: Oooh, I'm so glad you got rid of that Jafar person. All that negative
energy! Look at me! I'm a good guy now! I'm… I'm… a whoooooole new
biiiiiiiird!
GENIE: I got a question for you.
IAGO: Yeah?
GENIE: Original, or extra crispy?
IAGO: Aaaaaaaaaaaagh!
SULTAN: I believe we owe our thanks to you, young man.
(ALADDIN kneels and bow his head)
JASMINE: Father, I think I've finally decided upon a suitor.
ALADDIN: But you know the truth now. I'm no royal prince.
JASMINE: (taking ALADDIN's hand) You're much better. You are true of
heart and noble of spirit.
SULTAN: I agree. And besides, who am I to argue with true love?
GENIE: (bawling) Awwwwwwww, Al, I'm soo happy for ya! (he blows his
nose on CARPET, CARPET wipes it on GENIE) Yeah, just wipe that
anywhere. We gotta start planning the wedding! We'll need something old,
something new, something borrowed… and me!
ALADDIN: Genie, do I still have one more wish coming?
GENIE: Sure do. My wedding present to ya. What'll you have?
ALADDIN: I wish for your freedom, Genie!
GENIE: I – wha? You actually kept your promise! I'm finally
freeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Free at last, free at last! Thank you Al, thank you all,
thank you – tip your ushers, cause I get half. Come on, Carpet… I'm goin' to
Disneyland! (CARPET and GENIE exit stage left)
SULTAN: Your Genie isn't the only one facing a brand new future. (to the
audience) Royal subjects of Agrabah! My daughter has finally made her
choice.(a group of dancers enter, and ALADDIN and JASMINE skip away.
Moments later, they enter again on a pedestal, and JASMINE is wearing
a wedding veil)

CROWD/ALADDIN/JASMINE
A whole new world
A dazzling place
A new fantastic point of view
A whole new world (A whole new world)
That's where we'll be (That's where we'll be)

20
A thrilling chase, a wondrous place
For you and me
GENIE: (soaring over the audience on CARPET) Goodbye everyone! Hey,
look, I'm soarin' over California!!
CROWD: Aaaaahhhhhhh, A whole new world

(ALADDIN and JASMINE kiss)

Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh
Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh
Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh
A whole new world!

(ALL strike a final pose, and the lights go out)

(the cast then returns to the stage for a final curtain call)

ALL:
Mr. Aladdin, sir
Have a wish or two or three
I'm on the job
You big nabob
You ain't never had a friend
Never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend
Never had a friend
You ain't never
Had a
Friend
Like
Me
You ain't never had a friend like me!
HA!
(they pose, and the lights go out)
(the lights return, the cast takes a final bow, and disappears offstage as
the curtain falls. GENIE is the last to leave, laying on his stomach to get
a final wave in before the curtain drops)

THE END!

21