Nightmare in Numbers

It was a very nice morning with the sun shining brightly, and the clouds are being at their
whitest. As I walk in the corridor, I heard the sound of papers getting through the printers in the
teachers’ office and it seems like everyone is busy in the office. But I proceeded on walking
towards our classroom. A minute after I have settled myself in our classroom, our class adviser
came and informed us that today we will be knowing our grades for the first grading. I am a little
bit confident about it since I am a consistent top student and I knew that I have done my best.
When our English teacher came and began to call our names according to our grades in
descending order, I felt betrayed. Little did I know, that on that day I will be encountering my
lowest grade in my high school life. I am one of the students who got the lowest grade it was a
78 but suddenly it became 84, but still, I am not grateful about it. I was in tears looking at those
numbers that can’t even pay off the hard works that I have done.

I went home with a heavy heart but it became heavier when I told my mother about it. I
am expecting to receive some words of encouragement but I got blamed. I got blamed because
I have failed, I got blamed because I haven’t met their expectation towards me. Later that night,
I spent many hours crying in silence.

I used to love and feel excited every card day, but after that experience, card day
became a nightmare for me. And today, every time I struggle in school, I can’t help myself but
break down and cram because of the fear of failing again just like what happened on my junior
years. With this experience, I have realized that school isn’t always about fun and learning,
sometimes to those students like me, school is about expectations, unheard rants, and
competitions.