Going Reptile HOW ENGAGING YOUR INNER LIZARD LEADS 10 MORE FULFILLING WORK ée PERSONAL RELATIONSHTPS By Martha Hamilton Iustrated by Hattie Hyder Going Reptile HOW ENGAGING YOUR INNER LIZARD LEADS 10 MORE FULFILLING WORK & PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPSCONTENTS ACMA COTY TO THE REPTILE Irroduction to The Rept, 3 The Consaquences " Your Bein: Prt 19 ‘The Repilan Stagas 27 Going Viral ar The Brain: Patt 45 option sive 65 ‘The Four F's: Basic Repilln Styes 66 The Fin Sve 68 “The Fight sive 7 The Freeze Sie 76 The Faun Style 80 ‘ations You Can Take 87 Summary, 93 Practices & Glossary 99 Reforances & About the shor 104 St ae Senee Ent creer coma cohen ee eee err Peeererar anaGETTING TO KNOW YOUR INNER REPTILE Tat what wcll Gong Pt 2 NS WEARE HARDWIRED TO RESPOND TO THREATS Fewponostoatved'cunheb eopyou,” uu event of oul feat Bute we alive, The Reptilan Response is hardired for find ourselves reacting to a perceived thet reason: ifs useful and necessary. ituov reYOUR INWER LIZARD CAN GET IN THE WAY OF YOUR CAREER When a “perceived threat” triggers a pilin Rosponea ia business eoting, this can tum nto ‘carer iting move. ( some e~ LOOK FAMILIAR? os SOMEONE YOU KNOW? PERHAPS, EVEN YOU! Going Reptile can be: + Scary + Unnenving + Confusing + Disconcerting + Alto familar both to the person who 's Going Reptile and to those nearbyEVEN SUBTLE THINGS CAN SET OFF A REPTILIAN RESPONSE + Body language + Tone of voice + Facil exressions + Gestures + Behaviors + Certain words + And mary others THE SUBTLE REPTILE When you're around a Repilian Vibe, you can FEEL tt Sometmes you don't even have to see crear to know t's happening Imoicn okIN THE FOLLOWING SECTIONS, YOU WILL: Learn how te recognize what “Going Repti” looks and fees ike, even when itis subtle Understand how the Reptitan Response works and ts impact on individuals and groups Discover actions you can take wen you "Go Repo” or when youre onthe receiving end ‘Strengthen your capaci to prevent, ora least diminish, the probably of fture unraveling t's practice) yy ATCO Ia TaNWHEN WE GO REPTILE, WE: FOR EXAMPLE: + Are productive + Don'teollaborate well + Feel isolated + Don't see.a way out In the process, we lose access to our Highor- ‘Level Human Gapacites. This can impact us in all areas of our ite + Atwork + Athome + Sociaty + In our own sense of who we areACCESSING YOUR HIGHER-LEVEL HUMAN CAPACTTZES oe In contast to Going Reptile, we have Higher Level : "hewn ape hat all ot $y + ave yk + Flexible, agile + Open to sesing possibiltios + Motivated + Curious + Miionary + Able to handle complexity + Productive + Proactive + Connected with others + Compassionate fe GOING REPTILE 15 CONTAGIOUS It doesnt only affect individuals. impacts groups and entire organizations, because Reptiian Responses spread. My bad moment becomes youre tanTHe IDEAL Ideally, we al would have full access to ‘ur Higher-Level Human Capaciioe Incvicually ‘and as a group. THE CONSEQUENCES OF GOING REPTILE Individual Exhausted ‘demas Unappreciated i Unmet deadlines Blamng i Draining meatings Ta osuTHE REWARDS OF HAVING ACCESS TO OUR HIGHER-LEVEL HUMAN CAPACITIES Navigates challenges creatively UCU LATHE EVOLUTION OF OUR BRAINS TWO PRIMARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS ‘The human brains beautfuly complex. And brain research is continually revealing more about how the brah works. ‘The earlier part ofthe brain, the reptiian and ‘mammalian caters, are focised on salty ‘and eurvival In this book, we simply refer to these safety and ‘surival functions as the Repilan Functons.. “The prefrontal cortex isthe most recent ation to our brain. tis the seat of our Higher-Level Human Functions. Input comes into our bain in many ways, some ‘conscious, some unconscious + Sight + Reflex + Gut eelng + Sound Reaction tution aan Memon) eermaion “Touch + Sensation “Instinct + Perception ‘ie can respond with our Higher-Level Human Functions. This par of the brain dfrentiates us 2s human beings. It includes good decision-making ‘and appropriate socal and emotional responses. (Or, we may tespend with our Repilan Functions. ‘This pat ofthe brain chides the amygdela tho brain's alarm center—which is says scanning for threats The amygc the bras rade for tres, can take ver he rest of the bar party the prettental cortex”QUR BRAINS ARE TRAINED FOR THREAT RESPONSE ‘So, what determines whether we use our Higher [Level Human Functions or our Reptilan Functions? ‘Great question! Our brain makes a spi-second decision about whether a threat i presen. ta treat i present, our brain avers to the FReptiian Functions, bypassing the Higher-Level ‘Human Functions. FOR EXAMPLE: “we ind taking: On te thr hand encoun mugger: 2 ee Wot yoo, thats a treat €NESPONDING 10 THREATS, REAL OR IMAGINED Sometimes, we Go Reptile when he treat ‘may not be eal, yet our brain respon Wecall his «pecaved threat By te way, we {do ths all the tne, ts is concerned took one of approval or dhe forget his glasses? THE SUBTLEST THING CAN TRIGGER A REPTILIAN RESPONSE ‘Aporceived treat can be just about anything ‘that sets ofan alarm, leading toa Reptlion Response, ‘The more our brain percelvesa threat, the mare Body language Uncertainty CondescensionALL AT ONCE OX A SLOW BOLL! oo o GA igh option Human Functions Response REPTILIAN STAGES ‘Sometimes a Reptin Response works ikea light eviteh en immediate ful-on reptilian saety response oa threat, bypassing the prefrontal cortex (other tines, a Reptilon Response works more ‘koa dirmer swich As our Repilan Response ‘akes hold, our access to our Higher Love Human Functions (n our prefrontal cortex) diminishes. ‘The stronger the Reptilan Response, theless ‘access we have to our Higher-Level Human Functions,THE FLVE STAGES OF INTENSITY eat fone THE “FULL-ON HUMAN” STAGE In this stage, we have fll access to our Higher ‘Level Human Capactos and naturally use those with ease. Really, rmtine Pocket ed Roptilo. i Fallon ul Humen Ri Hera Sas «19THE “POCKET REPTILE” STAGE Inthis stage, we are aware ota Reptilan Response Starting to form, yet we stil have access to our Higher-Level Human Capacities, which help us navigate the situation. Really Vm tine Pocket Zipped Reptile Up Human Reptile. THE “REALLY, I’M FINE” STAGE (wt wor teat} In this stage, a Repilan Response is taking hold, We do our best to hide & behind a pleasant ‘exterior, hoping this wll help us navigate the situation. ‘We cannot see that wo've already ost access to 6ome of our Higher-Lovel Human Capacties. We're stil contained. Pockst Reptile. nen a oie Herts\\ THE “TIPPED UP” STAGE In this stage, we're Going Reptile and doing at We can to hold together. Wet attempting to zip up our Reptiian Response, desperately hoping the il help us navigate the stuston. ‘ie cannet see that wo've already lost access to:many of our Higher-Lovel Human Capactes. We're barey contained. Pocket Reptile Up Fulton Full-on Human Reptile. THE “FULL-ON REPTILE” STAGE [AL this stage, our reactive responses have taken over \ieve lost access to nearly all ur Higher Level ‘Human Capacities and don't even realize i Athi hal stage, we're losing it. Realy, rm fine Pocket Reptile Up Fulton HumanWE'RE CONSTANTLY FLIPPING BETWEEN STAGES ‘Some of us easily fp trom one stage to another [Many of us habitually lve between “Really I'm Fine" and “Zipped Up,” holding itll together. For most of us, this way of being was modeled A s in our educational and social envronments Really, Vm fine Zipped Up THE IDEAL: People who habitual tve between Ful-on Human and Pockst Reptile are rare. However, just tke learning 2 foreign language, Joucan num occas yar gira &-> avan Caption Pocket Reptile Fulton Human’HAVING NEGATIVE EMOTLONS DOESN'T NECESSARTLY MEAN YOU'RE GOING REPTILE [etm angry, state, rites, dasha @= INUGOING REPTILE WAS A RIPPLE EFFECT Going Reptile doesn't happen in a vacuum, When someone Goes Reptle, we can feo! it.we are impacted FOR EXAMPLE:HOW “GOING VIRAL” WoRKS \We automaticaly connect tothe emetional state of others through our "Neural WF; ~ ‘miror neurons in our bain fe up to match ‘the mirer neurons of others, often without seven being aware. And it happens in a ‘racton ofa second a THE PROCESS OF GOING VIRAL W'S 4. tan e rk hard to appear hap.BEING VIRAL ISN'T ALWAYS OBVIOUS Usual the person with the stronger intensity ‘or withthe greater power (ike 2 boss) influences ‘the interaction. YOU CAN'T KEEP 11 ALL INSIDE ‘Think about it I you are Zipped Up, you may think yoke holding tallin and keeping ital togethes, Controing your emotions But the ths, those ‘round you are picking up on your emotions on C ‘2 eubto level, through their own mirernourons: Your Zipped Up emotions have Gane ViralGOING VIRAL CAN WORK THE OTHER WAY, Too aU LaneIN REVIEW: .\ Weve seen that a threat, ora perceived threat, can kick off Roptiian Rospence. ot Rett est ett! ier me ecm te eae WR) meer te ttn ecm Torment at 50, THIS BRINGS UP THE QUESTION... Do you have Or doos your ‘your Reptle? Reptile have you?TUG-OF-WAR BETWEEN TOUR REPTELTAN AND PRE-FRONTAL FUNCTLONS ‘You could say, the answer depends on your brain. (Our brainshave a certain amount of functional bandwidth’ which gets allocated between the Higher-Level Human Functons ofthe preftontal Cortex and the Reptiian Functions. YOU ONLY HAVE SO MUCH MENTAL BANDWIDTH “The more bandit allocated tothe Reptikan Functions, the less avalable to the Higher Love Human Functons ofthe prorenta cot. a epi SS» WER: é Protrontal Cortex (PFC) Accoss MotorGOING INTO SURVIVAL MODE We CAN RE-TRAIN OUR BRAINS ‘As we've mentioned before, the Reptilan Functions hhave a realy clear jb: afety and survival, “These functions can laa us to go Ful-on Rapti, which can and wil take down the prerontal cortex. InFul-on Reptio, the bandwidth is taken up and the impact on parformanco is abvious. ‘But, even inthe subter stages of Going Reptile, performance diminishes. Fortunately, inthe subtler stages we have the ‘chance te natice when our Repilian Functions ‘send a “ping” of perceived threat. If these “pings” {90 unnoticed, the Reptilan Response escalates. Ite can be aware ofthese "pings." however, wo can work with thom. Our brain eave and ‘changing; it constantly rewies. And, because of this, we have the chance te intervene to train cour brain, ‘The Reptiian Functions, slone, cannat discern bboteon real threats and perceived threats. But the ‘reftntal cortex can. This is why it's 0 important to train our bran to workin an integrated way and Improve our discernment.AWORD FROM THE EXPERTS “The brains mutabe charges lho tne, a leconoarting ‘mount nf changes based onthe lighting sound you the wea, wha you et, nom you ako, the way you st even what you wear The canestancy ol the bain ke custard, and ts ‘rakeup is move kaa forest than 2 comput alvaye te, ‘sting, cheng” Dad oc “eran Wor 2009) sation of eroton and impulse rele greatly onthe jon baween te prefrontal crtax—the baits executive ‘and the emotional cents inthe ideal, porous ‘eutry converging onthe arya. “The ky perl aoa fr sltroglaton he prefrontal carte, which ‘na eenee, he bra’ ‘good boss. Guiding us when we ae curtest “The amygdala a tgger pot for emotional cstress, anger ‘mous fea ard eo on When this cxeuty takes over ast 2 the ‘Ded bose” Lending Usto taka seflons we might rage te Th Ba aE tiga Nowa) YOUR BRAIN WITHOUT TRAINING ‘Theis how our bean works in default mode. (Our Brain: 1. Continuously scars for treats 2, Sends a “ping” when a potential threat arises 8, Ifthe “ping” is avoided, denied of suppressed, our brain Sends an ala: threat «Files the isu for escalation another time + Starts @ Reptilan Response, which lnits ‘access tothe prefrontal cortex Tho Result: Your Reptile has you!ACASE STUDY: BO8’S BRAIN IN DEFAULT MODELEARNING TO RECOGNIZE YOUR REPTELLAN PATTERNS IH dont pay attention tothe “ping,* my Replilan Responses get stronger. But how <0 pay attention? Firat recognize the ping indicator, THE FOUR TYPES OF “PING” INDICATORS 4. Body sensations 2. Thoughts 8, Emotions 4, Tokng (ornot taking) action ‘There are many incicators to alert you to an