Benchmark Corrected Letters

Community Nurse Head
Care Well Hospital

Birmingham.
05 May 2010
Dear Community Nurse Head,
Re: Mr. Alfred Billy:
I’m writing to refer Mr. Alfred Billy, a 52-year-old truck driver admitted to our hospital with diagnosis of Commented [AH1]: I am
skin cancer – Basal Cell Carcinoma of the neck. Commented [AH2]: basal cell carcinoma
Mr. Billy doesn’t have any significant past medical history, but in terms of social history, he has been Commented [AH3]: does not
drinking for the last 30 years, and is a smoker.
During his stay at the hospital, he has not developed any complications. Skin biopsy is done and sent for Commented [AH4]: A s
pathological study. He is taking Panadin Forte 500mg for pain control. Commented [AH5]: Has been
Commented [AH6]: Panadeine
Mr. Billy is stable and well at the time of discharge and has no complaints of pain at the moment. It is
advised to continue his medication for one more week. In addition, daily observation is suggested. You can Commented [AH7]: required
contact her wife, Mrs. Maria Jennifer, who is staying with him in case of emergency. Commented [AH8]: his (masculine)
Thank you for agreeing to see Mr. Billy. Should further information be required, do not hesitate to contact
me.
Regards,
Charge Nurse
Royal Perth Hospital
Report
Word length 159
Comments The letter contains relevant information and is
structured in a logical manner. Contractions are
used, which are not appropriate in formal writing.
Estimated Grade B-
Advice 1. Revise grammar and be careful with spelling
and capitalization.
2. Always proofread the letter after finishing
writing it.
Nursing Letter 1
Writing Test
Time allowed:
Writing : 40 Minutes
Read the case notes below and complete the writing task which follows.
Hospital Patient Details
Admission Date Discharge Date Diagnosis
296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

http://www.benchmarkedu.com.au/oet-writing-correction
www.benchmarkedu.com.au/pteoetielts
Past Medical History Social History/Supports
Medical Progress
Nursing Management
Royal Perth Hospital
Alfred Billy 52 Years old Marital status: married Wife to be contacted if there is any sort of emergency: Maria
Jennifer, Arillon City Arcade 207 Murray Street Perth
21/03/2010 5/05/2010
Skin cancer – BCC (Basal Cell Carncinoma) (neck) Nodular basal-cell carcinoma
No prior hospitalization, no history Medications Truck Driver
Lives with her wife Habit of consuming liquor for th past 30 years Cigarette Smoker Skin dark Religion: Protestant
Skin biopsy is taken for pathological study CCB - removal of Pain reliever panadein forte 500mg
No complications noted
Perfectly well at the time of discharge No complain of any pain
Discharge Plan Daily obs Medicine to be taken for one more week

Ticket Id: 6753
Barnaby Webster
School Psychologist
Toohey Point Primary State School
07/03/2012
Re: Alison Cooper, DOB: 14/06/2002
Dear Mr. Webster, Comment [MOK1]: Dear Mr. Webster,

Re: Alison Cooper, DOB: 14/06/2002
I am writing to refer Alison Cooper, a year 5 student for your assessment. th

Comment [MOK2]: 5 year
Alison lives with her mother, who is working full time as a bank manager and her two siblings. Alison had Comment [MOK3]: ,
been good at studies until his father’s death. Since then she is regularly being absent from school. Her Comment [MOK4]: has been regularly
absent
grandmother usually picks her up from school when she needed to be sent back home due to sickness. She
Comment [MOK5]: s
has trouble concentrating in the class and is reluctant to take part in class or sport activities. Moreover, she
is insecure about being overweight and having eczema in her hands. Comment [MOK6]: has
Alison’s mother was contacted by the class teacher and, to which she responded that Alison is becoming
withdrawn at home also. She revealed that Alison was so close to her father and still grieving his death, Comment [MOK7]: had also been
withdrawn at home.
which makes her seek comfort in eating junk foods.
Comment [MOK8]: for
It would be greatly beneficial to Alison if you could assess her to find out her psychological problems. Comment [MOK9]: made
Should you need further information, do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours Sincerely Comment [MOK10]: sincerely,
School Health Nurse
Report
Word length 175
Comments It is visible that the letter tries to cover relevant
case notes. Communication and coherence
throughout the letter are fairly well. However,
there are some mistakes with tenses and
punctuation.
Estimated Grade C+
Advice 1. Revise grammar
2. Be careful with reported speech, punctuation
3. Try to write at least 180 words.
4. Always proofread the letter after finishing it.
Helpful links https://www.benchmarkedu.com.au/oet-reading-
practice-tests
https://www.benchmarkedu.com.au/oet-writing-
correction
https://www.facebook.com/groups/oethelp

Ticket Id: 6755
Ms. Marcia Devonport

West End Physiotherapy Centre
62 Vulture Street, West End
Brisbane 4101
23/05/2008
Re: Mr. Bob Dawson, DOB: 25/09/1924
Dear Ms. Devonport Comment [MOK1]: Dear Ms. Devonport

Re: Mr. Bob Dawson, DOB: 25/09/1924
I am writing on behalf of Mrs. Elizabeth, wife of Mr. Dawson to request a home visit to assess and advise Comment [MOK2]: Mr Dawson’s wife,
regarding improving her husband’s mobility. Comment [MOK3]: him
Comment [MOK4]: advice
Mr. Dawson has had suffered cerebrovascular accident four years ago. He undergone for a successful
Comment [MOK5]: to improve
rehabilitation, but still has residual weakness on the right side with slight balance and speech impairment.
Comment [MOK6]: had an
On 18/05/2008 he sustained an injury to his left knee due to a fall. Our agency has been helping with
Comment [MOK7]: underwent
dressing his wound and showering as per the request of his GP.
Comment [MOK8]: process,
After a few days of caring, it was noted that his knee was healing well and he could walk around house Comment [MOK9]: ,
with assistance of his wife. Use of walking stick has been suggested, but found out that he is not sure how Comment [MOK10]: a
to use it properly. Comment [MOK11]: was
Comment [MOK12]: . However, it was
It would be greatly appreciated if you could arrange a physiotherapist to visit their home and provide noted that he was
assistance to improve his mobility. I have attached the home address with this letter. Comment [MOK13]: His home address
is attached with this letter
Should you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours sincerely,
Sonya Matthews
Nursing Sister
Blue Nursing Home Care Agency
Report
Word length 178
Comments An effort to cover relevant case notes is visible.
However, paragraphing needs to be improved
further. There are mistakes with tenses, articles,
word choice and punctuation.
Estimated Grade C
Advice 1. Improve paragraphing
2. Be careful with tenses, articles, punctuation.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 6842
Ms. Samantha Bruin

Senior Nurse
Grey walls Nursing Home
21 Station Road, Grey walls
07 September 2010
Dear Ms. Bruin,
Re: Mr. Gerald Baker, Aged 79 Years Comment [Benchmark1]: a
Mr. Baker is being referred back into your facility for continuity of care. He has undergone for a left total Comment [Benchmark2]: I am writing
to refer
hip replacement surgery and is ready for discharge today.
During hospitalization, following the surgery, he seemed to be disoriented, probably because of the
anesthesia. Moreover, his Hb level dropped to 72, for which he has been transfused with 3 units of packed Comment [Benchmark3]: was
red blood cells, which helped to raise the Hb level to 112. Other than that he had no complaints and
started to ambulate with the help of a wheelie – walker.
He was prescribed with aspirin 100mg, ramipril 5mg to control his blood pressure and Panadeine Forte 2 Comment [Benchmark4]: In terms of
medication, he
tablet three times a day as needed to control the pain, of which the latter needs to be monitored. In
Comment [Benchmark5]: R
addition, occupational therapy along with range of motion exercise was provided.
Comment [Benchmark6]: Panadein
It is advised to continue with the exercise program and to observe and preserve the skin integrity. A toilet Comment [Benchmark7]: tablets
raiser has already been arranged by the hospital social worker for two weeks and a wheelie-walker and a Comment [Benchmark8]: the
wedge pillow will be sent with the Mr. Baker. Please note that his staples to be removed on 21 September Comment [Benchmark9]: along
and a follow-up visit has been scheduled on the same day to check his FBE and UES. Comment [Benchmark10]: will
Should you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact me. Comment [Benchmark11]: please
Yours Sincerely, Comment [Benchmark12]: s
Charge Nurse
Report
Word length 226
Comments An effort to finish the task is visible. Flow of
information is logical and relevant case notes have
been covered well. However, there are several
errors mainly related to capitalisation, tense,
spelling and singular-plural issues. In addition, the
introductory sentence could be written in a better
way. Overall, the letter can be improved further.
Estimated Grade C+
Advice 1. Pay a little more attention to grammatical
range and accuracy.
2. Be careful with spelling and capitalisation.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7181
District Nurse,
District Nursing Centre, Lake Park
Lake Park
19 March 2010
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Mr. Andrew O’Connor, aged 74 years
I am writing to request daily home visit to Mr. O’Connor, who has been diagnosed with stroke. He will be Comment [Benchmark1]: for
discharged from North West Rehabilitation Hospital back home on 22 March. Comment [Benchmark2]: to
During hospitalization, after the diagnosis of stroke, which resulted in right side paralysis, he was given Comment [Benchmark3]: the
intensive physiotherapy and occupation therapy, but noted that he was responding to the therapy slowly. Comment [Benchmark4]: it was
He requires assistance with activities of daily living. However, he can eat by himself and move around Comment [Benchmark5]: Therefore,
he
slowly with the help of a frame.
In view of his present condition, option of nursing home placement was advised to the family, but they Comment [Benchmark6]: the
refused the same. So, necessary modifications were done to his bathroom and toilet after a home
assessment last week.
In terms of social history, Mr. O’Connor lives with his 71-year-old wife, who has heart problems. Moreover,
his kids do not live near by. Comment [Benchmark7]: children
Comment [Benchmark8]: nearby.
It would be greatly beneficial to Mr. O’Connor and his family if you could arrange a nurse to visit his house
twice daily to help him with mobilization, bathing and grooming. Please monitor his medications and also
his wife’s health. Note that Mr. O’Connor will have to attend day hospital three times a week. Details of his Comment [Benchmark9]: Please note
medications along with doctor’s note will be forwarded with the patient. If necessary, the patient can be Comment [Benchmark10]: the
referred to our hospital.
Should you need any information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully,
Charge Nurse
Report
Word length 237
Comments The candidate has attempted the task well. Flow of
information is logical and relevant information has
been covered well. However, there are minor
inaccuracies pertaining to preposition, article and
word choice. Nevertheless, the letter meets the
expectations.
Estimated Grade B
Advice 1. Pay a little more attention to grammatical
range and accuracy.
2. Be careful with word choice.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7183
Supervisor
Eventide Residential Aged Care
333 Glen Eira Road, Ripponlea, Vic 3185
12 November 2016
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Mrs. Margaret Goldstein, aged 61 years
Mrs. Goldstein is being discharged back into your facility for permanent full-time care after 3 days of
treatment at Caulfield Private Hospital for a dislocated elbow.
During hospitalization, Mrs. Goldstein was prescribed Atacant Plus 32/12.5 25mg and Remeron 15mg once Commented [jc1]: Atacand
per day. In addition, Oxycodone 5mg three times a day to be continued to control the pain. His wound is Commented [jc2]: is
healing slowly and the right elbow us supported in a cuff with sling. Commented [jc3]: Her
Commented [jc4]: is
Mr. Goldstein can mobilise with some assistance and uses a wheelchair. She refuses to wear disposable
Commented [jc5]: Mrs.
brief even though she cannot control her bladder. So, she requires incontinent care and help with
Commented [jc6]: briefs
showering.
Commented [jc7]: She
Mrs. Goldstein’s husband will pick her from the hospital and will be dropped at your facility. When in your Commented [jc8]: up
care, monitor he elbow for proper healing. She will have to follow-up with a physiotherapist and please Commented [jc9]: please
note that an appointment has been scheduled on 28 November at 2 pm at Eventide. Commented [jc10]: her
Should you need any further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully,
Charge Nurse
North Caulfield Private Hospital
Report
Word length 170
Comments This is a good letter with appropriate selection of
case notes and logical paragraphing. There is good
coherence throughout. Mistakes pertaining to
word choice and sentence formation are visible.
However, these do not reduce communication. The
letter meets the expectations.
Estimated Grade B
Advice 1. Revise grammar (gender pronouns)
2. Improve sentence formation
3. Write at least 180 words
4. Always proofread your letter
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7185
Child Health Nurse

Greenville Maternal and Child Health Centre
Main Rd, Greenville
22 March 2010
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Ann Ballard, aged 22 months
I am writing to refer Mrs. Christine Ballard and her daughter Ann Ballard, who is due to be discharged
today from our hospital following an admission with burns. They need your assessment and follow-up after Commented [jc1]: will
discharge.
Ann Ballard was brought in to hospital with second degree burns to right trunk and arm due to accidental
scalding with hot water. During hospitalization, she was treated with IV fluids add daily dressing with
silvazine. In addition, antibiotics to prevent infection and analgesics were also administered. Commented [jc2]: Silvazine
In terms of social history, Ann lives with her mother and her elder brother in a new housing development.
Moreover, Mrs. Ballard got separated from his husband recently and has been suffering from financial Commented [jc3]: her
difficulties since then. Since her parents live out of state, she seems socially isolate and depressed. So, She Commented [jc4]: isolated
has been refereed to a social worker. Commented [jc5]: Consequently/ Therefore
Commented [jc6]: she
It would be greatly appreciated, if you could arrange someone to dress the baby’s wounds. Kindly monitor
Commented [jc7]: referred
Mrs. Ballard’s mental state and it would be greatly beneficial for her if you could introduce her to some
Commented [jc8]: Choose a different word to
local support groups such as mother’s group and local childcare centre. Please note that she will need an avoid repetition.
appointment with local financial counselor to sort out her financial problems Commented [jc9]: a
Commented [jc10]: a
Yours faithfully,
Charge Nurse
Children’s Hospital
Report
Word length 220
case notes and logical paragraphing. There is good
coherence throughout. Mistakes pertaining to
word choice and sentence formation are visible.
However, these do not reduce communication. The
letter meets the expectations.
Estimated Grade B
3. Improve choice of words
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7185

Ticket Id: 7275
Community Nurse
Community Health Centre, Woodville
Woodville
10 January 2010
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Ms. Monica Osburn, aged 69 years
I am writing to refer Ms. Osburn, an elderly divorcee who lives on her own for continuity of care. She will
be moving from Newport into a new accommodation in Woodville near to your Centre. Comment [teacher1]: to be near her
daughter
Ms. Osburn had been under our care from 2003 until January 2010. She has been suffering from Comment [teacher2]: has
hypertension and depression for 10 and 2 years respectively, for which she has been on medications. Comment [teacher3]: since
However, she often has difficulty managing the self administration of medications. Comment [teacher4]: in
In terms of social history, Ms. Osburn has been drinking for quite a long time with increased alcohol intake
when she is upset.
It would be greatly appreciated if you could arrange a medical practitioner for Ms. Osburn when under Comment [teacher5]: she comes
your care. Please note that she will need to be monitored for compliance with her medications and her
drinking problem. Moreover, it would be beneficial to her to attend family or social activities such as Comment [teacher6]: and
elderly citizen’s club or voluntary groups. Comment [teacher7]: an
Thank you for agreeing to assist Ms. Osburn. Should you need any further information, please do not
hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully,
Nurse
Community Health Centre
Newport.
Report
Word length 181
Comments The letter has a few errors pertaining to grammar
and word choice. The flow of information is
smooth. Overall, the letter meets the expectations.
Estimated Grade B or B+
Advice 1. Revise grammar.
2. Improve choice of words.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7627
Sharon Wilkins
Home Care Nurse
Prestige Care
393 Victoria Road
Newtown, Bray brook
16 July 2017
Dear Ms. Wilkins,
Re: Mrs. Aisha Amari, aged 75
I am writing to request home care for Mrs. Amari, an elderly woman, who lives alone. She attended our Comment [teacher1]: already covered
in Re
clinic today with complaint of chronic ankle pain and was discharged after a day of care.
In terms of medical history, Mrs. Amari has been suffering from Type 2 diabetes mellitus and hypertension
for 3 years and 18 months respectively for which she is on beta-blockers and calcium channel blockers. Comment [teacher2]: as well as
Moreover, she has been managing her chronic ankle pain with Paracetamol and Deep Heat cream. Comment [teacher3]: p
Despite having blurred vision and mild memory loss, Mrs. Amari can ambulate and transfer independently
and her speech and hearing are within normal limits. Also, her bowel and bladder are incontinent. There Comment [teacher4]: as well as
are no assistive devices installed at her home apart from a pull-cord in bathroom and bedroom. Comment [teacher5]: each
Comment [teacher6]: the
It would be greatly appreciated if you could arrange a home care nurse to visit Mrs. Amari two days in a
Comment [teacher7]: the
week in order to help her with showering, dressing and some household chores. In addition to that, please
assess her house for installation of assistive devices. May I remind you that, she does speak only Arabic and
her son, Mr. Ahmed, can be contacted for interpretation. Comment [teacher8]: ?
Yours sincerely,
Nurse
Westborough Medical Clinic
Report
Word length 212
Comments Apart from a few inaccuracies, the letter is well
written and covers all the case notes adequately.
Estimated Grade B+
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 7652
The Admissions Officer

Peter MacCullum Cancer Centre
305 Gratttan St.
Melbourne, VIC 3000
11 July 2017
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Mr. Bruce Brew, aged 36
Mr. Brew, a farmer, who has been diagnosed with stage 3 oesophageal cancer, is being transferred into
your facility for urgent assessment and specialized management.
Mr. Brew was admitted to our hospital 5 days ago with complaint of pain below the sternum. On
assessment, he appeared malnourished, distressed and pale. Moreover, there was tenderness in the
epigastric area on palpation. During the hospital course, he underwent several procedures including
endoscopy, biopsy and barium swallow, which confirmed his diagnosis of cancer in the gastroesophageal
junction. Oxycodone was administered intravenously to control his pain.
Regarding his medical history, Mr. Brew has been suffering from heartburn for the past few year for which Comment [teacher1]: years
he treated himself with OTC medications. In addition, he had lost around 10 kg in 6 months and was facing
swallowing difficulty. He has been a heavy drinker with family history of cancer. Comment [teacher2]: a
Mr. Brew is being transferred to you by Seymur Ambulance Service. Tel. 1300 606060.. Based on his
present condition, he will need an urgent evaluation to assess the need for surgery or radiotherapy, or
both. Also, his reports are attached with this letter. Please note that the patient has already been informed
of his condition.
Thank you for your assistance in this matter. Should you need any further information, please do not
hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully
Nurse
Report
Word length 216
Estimated Grade B+
2. Improve coherence.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 8246
Ms. Loretta Pasquale

Physiotherapist
43 Anderson Street
Templestowe
12 January 2016
Dear Ms. Pasquale
Re: Mr. George Chien, aged 54
I am writing to refer Mr. Chien, who has been diagnosed with osteoarthritis of right knee, into your care for
assessment and care. He is medically stable and was discharged home today.
Mr. Chien came into our hospital on 10 January with complaint of progressive right knee pain. He has Comment [teacher1]: a
undergone right total knee surgery recently. On assessment, his right knee was swollen moderately with
fluid build-up, which resulted in severe difficulty moving his right lower extremity.
During hospitalization, Mr. Chien was found to be moderately anemic. His knee swelling was treated with
ice packs. In addition, Arixtra was prescribed for pain, which was discontinued prior to discharge.
Mr. Chien can now ambulate short distance with the help of a front-wheel walker. Moreover, he is able to Comment [teacher2]: distances
do lower body dressing with minimal assistance. However, he still needs assistance with bed mobility and
transfers due to limited range of motion of right knee. Comment [teacher3]: the
It would be greatly appreciated if you could provide Mr. Chien with a comprehensive rehabilitation
treatment to improve his mobility and speed up his recovery. Please note that his surgical knee incision is
completely healed now.
Should you need further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours sincerely,
Nurse
St. Andrews Hospital
Report
Word length 201
Estimated Grade B+
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 8448
The Community Information Section

Heart Foundation
Gregory Terrace
Brisbane
09 September 2012
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Mr. Bill O’Riley
I am writing on behalf of Mr. O’Riley, who has been diagnosed with obstructive coronary artery disease, to
request dietary advice. He underwent a coronary artery bypass graft operation on 04 September and is
being discharged today after making a full recovery.
In terms of social history, Mr. O’Riley is single and lives alone. He smokes around 20 cigarettes as well as
drink two bottles of beer per day. For this reason, he was advised to stop smoking and reduce alcohol Commented [jc1]: drinking
intake. Moreover, he usually eats junk foods such as sausages and fried chips. In addition, he is overweight
and leads a sedentary life style with a body weight of 99kg and BMI of 29. Commented [jc2]: a
Mr. O’Riley recovered well and his incision wound is healing well. He can walk without any assistance. Commented [jc3]: has
It would be greatly beneficial to Mr. O’Riley if you could send his low fat dietary guidelines along with a list
of some healthy simple recipes on his address 9476 Old Dam Road, Goondi windi, QLD 4390. Please note Commented [jc4]: to
that he is allergic to nuts.
Yours faithfully,
Lee Wong
Registered Nurse
St. Andrews Hospital
Brisbane.
Report
Word length 190
Comments The letter covers the case notes very well.
Information has been written in relevant order
with good coherence and logical paragraphing. The
letter meets expectations. There are only a few
minor inaccuracies, and these do not reduce
communication.
Estimated Grade B+
3. Keep up the good work!
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 9033
The Admitting Doctor

Emergency Department
Spirit Hospital
10 July 2012
Dear Doctor,
Re: Mrs. Betty Olsen, DOB: 29 January 1929
I am writing to refer Mrs. Olsen, who is a resident of Golden Pond Retirement Village for your urgent
assessment and care. She is being transferred to the Emergency Department by ambulance after she was
complaining chest pain and looked distressed. Comment [BH1]: /her complaints of
chest pain and distress.
Mrs. Olsen complained of shoulder pain on 07 July, which was relieved Panadol and Normison tablets. Two Comment [BH2]: by
days later, she requested for Mylanta and Panadol for indigestion and shoulder pain. On assessment in the Comment [BH3]: today in the morning,
Moring today, she looked tired and weak. Moreover, her BP was found to be higher at 180/95. In the
evening she could not eat the meal as she was nauseous as well as complaining shoulder pain and neck Comment [BH4]: ,
pain. For this reason, she was prescribed Panadol and Normison. However, on reassessment at 10.45pm, Comment [BH5]: her
she appeared pale, sweaty and reported to have persisting chest pain, and hence decided to shift her to
the hospital.
In terms of her medical history, Mrs. Olsen has been suffering from hypothyroidism, hypertension and
glaucoma for past several years for which she is on Karvea 150mg, and Oroxine 0.1mg once daily, Timolol Comment [BH6]: ; hence, she was
transferred to the hospital.
Eye Drops 0.5% twice daily and Normison 10mg as required.
Comment [BH7]: the
It would be greatly appreciated if you could assess Mrs. Olsen urgently and treat her as you feel Comment [BH8]: Please note, she is
appropriate. Please note that she is allergic to penicillin. allergic to penicillin.
Should you need any further information, do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours sincerely,
Nurse
Report
Word length 230
Comments The letter covers relevant case notes.
Communication is fairly well throughout the letter.
However, there are mistakes with articles, word
choice and punctuation. Overall, the letter requires
further improvements.
Estimated Grade C
Advice 1. Be careful with articles, word choice and
punctuation
2. Try to finish the letter in 200 words by writing
in brief when possible.
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id: 9314
Ms. Susan Williams

The Hospital Social Worker
Prince Charles Hospital
Brisbane
05 April 2012
Dear Ms. Williams,
Re: Mr. Yanlin Ma, DOB: 31 March 1980
I am writing to refer Mr. Ma, a Chinese student, who has been diagnosed with aortic dissection, for your
assistance with paper works associated with university and immigration. He underwent an open-chest
surgery on 31 March and is due to be discharged on 09 April.
Mr. Ma was transferred to our hospital on 31 March from Royal Brisbane Women’s Hospital after
investigations revealed that he had dissection of aorta. Apart from being hypertensive for first few days, he Commented [JG1]: the
made good recovery from the surgery.
In terms of social history, Mr. Ma smokes around 5-6 cigarettes per day. In addition, he is overweight with
a body weight of 105kg. His mother has reached Australia recently, however, she does not speak English.
Moreover, the lease contract on his accommodation has already been expired and his visa will be expiring
at the end of the semester. There is a main concern that he will not be able to finish university assessment
on time.
It would be greatly appreciated if you could visit Mr. Ma before his discharge to help him with arranging an
accommodation as well as preparing letters to university and immigration. Arranging a referral to a
smoking cessation and a weight loss program will also benefit him.
Yours sincerely,
Annie Smith
Cardiac Nurse
Report
Word length 219
Comments Great letter! The case notes are covered in great
detail. The letter is professional and the
information pertinent. The grammar and sentence
structure are accurate
Estimated Grade A
Advice 1. Always proofread your work
2. Keep up the good work!
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id:
To whom it may concern
08 August 2017
I am writing to inform you regarding Ebola and its possible route of transmission as a part of government’s Commented [jc1]: the
awareness campaigns initiative.
Ebola is a contagious and deadly disease characterized by fever and severe internal bleeding. The Filo virus Commented [jc2]: ,
which is responsible for the disease spread through direct contact with infected body fluid. Precautions are Commented [jc3]: is
necessary, because Australia is in danger of spreading Ebola. Commented [jc4]: ,
It is important to note that Ebola can be contracted if a person is exposed to a suspected or confirmed case
with in 21 days. The ways in which someone can get the disease include living with a confirmed case and Commented [jc5]: within
being in close contact with a patient. There is also a possibility with touching blood, body fluid or clothes of Commented [jc6]: of contracting the virus
through
a dead or alive patient. Moreover, a baby breastfed by an infected mother is also at high risk.
Commented [jc7]: the
Commented [jc8]: living
In addition, a sick or dead animal can also be a source of infection. Those who had direct contact with an
Commented [jc9]: have
infected animal, had exposed to animal’s blood or body fluid or ate raw bush-meet have high chance of
Commented [jc10]: have been
being an Ebola patient.
Commented [jc11]: an
Commented [jc12]: have eaten
Should you need any further information do not hesitate to contact me at the camp.
Commented [jc13]: meat
Commented [jc14]: a
Yours faithfully
Community Nurse
Department of Public Health and Awareness Camp
Melbourne
Report
Word length 201
case notes and logical paragraphing. However,
there are some mistakes in sentence formation,
word choice and tense. Overall, the letter requires
further improvements.
Estimated Grade C+
3. Improve choice of words
practice-tests
correction

Ticket Id:
The Community Health Nurse

Brunswick Family Care Clinic
44 Decarle Street
Brunswick
Vic 3056
15 January 2011
Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Mr. Mavis Brampton, 72-year-old widow Comment [kb1]: Mrs.
I am writing to refer Mr. Brampton, who has been diagnosed with pleurisy into your care for assessment, Comment [kb2]: Mrs.
monitoring and continuity of care. She and is being discharged today after 5 days of care.
Mr. Brampton came into our hospital with complaints of fever, productive cough and shortness of breath. Various Comment [kb3]: Mrs.
medicines including antibiotics were started to control her fever and eventually she made a good recovery.
In terms of social history, Mr. Brampton lives alone. Apart from this, she has been a smoker for a long time. For this
reason, she was advised to stop smoking. In addition, nicotine patches and Zyban 150 mg three times a day were
prescribed to help him quit smoking. Comment [kb4]: her
It would be greatly appreciated if you could observe her for the compliance to the medications and adherence to Comment [kb5]: with
the non-smoking regimen. She will need to continue Zyban for next two months and nicotine patches until the
craving for the cigarettes stops. However, Zyban should be stopped immediately if she develops dry mouth or
difficulty sleeping. It would be a great help to her if you could arrange a Meals on Wheels to provide with nutritious Comment [kb6]: her
meals to help her reduce some weight. Please note that, she needs assistance with shopping as well as house
keeping.
Should you need any information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Yours faithfully,
Nurse
Northern Community Hospital
Report
Word length 223
Comments In the opening sentence, it is not clear who
provided the assessment and monitoring.
Otherwise this letter is well structured. It contains
clear advice about the ongoing care needs.
Estimated Grade C+
Advice 1. Take care to ensure you include the correct
honorific and pronouns.
2. Ensure it is clear who “you’ and ‘your’ relate to.
practice-tests
correction


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Community Nurse Head

Care Well Hospital

Dear Community Nurse Head,

Re: Mr. Alfred Billy:

Royal Perth Hospital

Hospital Patient Details

Admission Date Discharge Date Diagnosis

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Royal Perth Hospital

No prior hospitalization, no history Medications Truck Driver

Perfectly well at the time of discharge No complain of any pain

Discharge Plan Daily obs Medicine to be taken for one more week

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Re: Alison Cooper, DOB: 14/06/2002

Dear Mr. Webster, Comment [MOK1]: Dear Mr. Webster,

I am writing to refer Alison Cooper, a year 5 student for your assessment. th

Yours Sincerely Comment [MOK10]: sincerely,

School Health Nurse

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Ms. Marcia Devonport

Re: Mr. Bob Dawson, DOB: 25/09/1924

Dear Ms. Devonport Comment [MOK1]: Dear Ms. Devonport

Blue Nursing Home Care Agency

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Ms. Samantha Bruin

Dear Ms. Bruin,

Re: Mr. Gerald Baker, Aged 79 Years Comment [Benchmark1]: a

Yours Sincerely, Comment [Benchmark12]: s

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Re: Mr. Andrew O’Connor, aged 74 years

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Re: Mrs. Margaret Goldstein, aged 61 years

North Caulfield Private Hospital

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Child Health Nurse

Re: Ann Ballard, aged 22 months

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Re: Ms. Monica Osburn, aged 69 years

Community Health Centre

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Dear Ms. Wilkins,

Re: Mrs. Aisha Amari, aged 75

Westborough Medical Clinic

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

The Admissions Officer

Re: Mr. Bruce Brew, aged 36

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

Ms. Loretta Pasquale

Dear Ms. Pasquale

Re: Mr. George Chien, aged 54

St. Andrews Hospital

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

The Community Information Section

Re: Mr. Bill O’Riley

St. Andrews Hospital

296 Henley Beach Rd, Underdale, 5032

No prior hospitalization, no history Medications Truck Driver

Discharge Plan Daily obs Medicine to be taken for one more week