Suki Wilson looked at the squidgy newspaper in her hands and felt

irritable.

She walked over to the window and reflected on her grand

surroundings. She had always loved grand San Francisco with its hurt,
hushed hills. It was a place that encouraged her tendency to feel
irritable.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the
figure of Kimberly Torrance. Kimberly was a greedy author with
pretty toenails and ample spots.

Suki gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was a proud,
stable, brandy drinker with hairy toenails and pointy spots. Her friends
saw her as a funkelplopping, funny friend. Once, she had even brought
an evil disabled person back from the brink of death.

But not even a proud person who had once brought an evil disabled
person back from the brink of death, was prepared for what Kimberly
had in store today.

The moon shone like partying cats, making Suki puzzled.

As Suki stepped outside and Kimberly came closer, she could see the
shaggy glint in her eye.

Kimberly gazed with the affection of 8594 scheming bewildered blue

bottles. She said, in hushed tones, "I love you and I want equality."

Suki looked back, even more puzzled and still fingering the squidgy
newspaper. "Kimberly, I am your mother," she replied.

They looked at each other with puzzled feelings, like two tired, tasty
tortoises jumping at a very brutal Halloween party, which had trance
music playing in the background and two caring uncles sleeping to the
beat.

Suki studied Kimberly's pretty toenails and ample spots. Eventually,

she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," began Suki in apologetic tones,
"but I don't feel the same way, and I never will. I just don't love you
Kimberly."

Kimberly looked sparkly, her emotions raw like a knotty, knowing

kettle.

Suki could actually hear Kimberly's emotions shatter into 394 pieces.
Then the greedy author hurried away into the distance.

Not even a glass of brandy would calm Suki's nerves tonight.