5 Helping Skills for Counselors

•Attending behavior

•Questioning

•Confrontation

•Focusing

•Reflection of Meaning

Microskill1: Attending behavior

•Attending is the behavioral aspect of building rapport.

•Counselor/facilitator must indicate to the client that they are interested in listening and in helping them.

•Through attending, the counselor/facilitator is able to encourage the client to talk and open up about their issues.
Eye Contact

•Eye contact is important and polite (in Western society) when speaking or listening to another person.

•No need to lock gaze; just maintain normal eye contact to show genuine interest in what the client is saying.

S.O.L.E.R.

•When working with a client, you want to send a message that you are listening.
•This can be done by being attentive both verbally (responding to the client)and nonverbally.
•SOLER is an acronym which serves to remind us how to listen.

S.O.L.E.R.

S: Face the client squarely; that is, adopt a posture that indicates involvement.
O: Adopt an open posture. Sit with both feet on the ground to begin with and with your hands folded, one over the
other.
L: As you face your client, lean toward him or her. Be aware of their space needs.
E: Maintain eye contact. Looking away or down suggests that you are bored or ashamed of what the client is saying.
Looking at the person suggests that you are interested and concerned.
R: As you incorporate these skills into your attending listening skills, relax.
Microskill2: Questioning

•Questions during the helping interaction can aid in opening up new areas for discussion.
•Questions that invite clients to think or recall information can aid in a client’s journey of self-exploration.

Types of Questions

Open—allows the client to answer the question in a free-flowing or narrative style. Used when you want more
detailed and elaborate answers.
•Tell me how this is working for you?

Closed—this type of question requires only a one or two word response. Usually…Yes or No.
•Do you enjoy that type of work?

Types of Question

Probes—questions which begin with a who, what, where, how, or when.

•What do you plan to do to complete your project?

Requests for Clarification—Asking the client for more information.

•Help me understand what this relationship is for.
Providing Lead

•“How” questions tend to invite the client to talk about their feelings.

•“What” questions more often lead to the emergence of facts.

•“When” questions bring about information regarding timing of the problem, and this can include events and
information preceding or following the event.

Providing Lead

•“Where” questions reveal the environment, situation or place that the event took place.

•“Why” questions usually give the counsellor information regarding the reasons of the event or information leading
up to the event.

(Care must be taken when asking “why” questions. Why question can provoke feelings of defensiveness in clients and
may encourage clients to feel as though they need to justify themselves in some way.)