<Advises for Thesis argument map>

23. March. 2020. Jaehong MIN

<Overall point out>

You guys should try hard to summarize sentences. Try to use
picture/table rather than sentence. Some of you have little
understanding of differences between reports and papers. The paper
outline should determine the results of the relevant literature survey
and the methodology accordingly. The relevant literature chapter
should summarize the theoretical contents and the findings of others.
To present a new model, you need to explain the limitations that an
existing model has and to overcome that limitation, you need to
explain which model you are presenting..

<by personell>
Tokhir: Use more pictures/tables to make it easier to understand.
Look for data on methodology as well as actual similar studies,
summarize what they have done, and point out the validity of their
methodology. If it is the same way they have done and you would
like to do, it could be a duplication. You have to provide a logical
explanation of why you have to do it in same way, or show
difference in application. You can consider comparing it in several
ways.

Aigerim: Quantitative analysis seems to be difficult. It would be better

to look up related papers that identify the relationship between
investment in railway infrastructure and economic development, and
analyze how the papers interpreted and how the relevant methods
would work for Kazakhstan.

Dilba: You'd like to say a lot, but it's likely that a proper analysis

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will not follow. The paper must be able to prove your own
arguments, and it is efficient to analyze with appropriate theoretical
model to do so. Based on the title only, you seem to want to present
a PPP model. If so, it is efficient to show it is possible by CBA for
the route.

Julian: Very clear. It will be a better paper if the impact of the

simulation results on actual operations (how much power
consumption and annual operating cost can be reduced) is analyzed.

Esmail : Additional vehicle purchase should be considered for the

capital cost. In the social cost benefit analysis, the increase in fare
collection is excluded from the benefits for transfer expenses in
Korea, but is sometimes treated as benefits. Theoretically, from an
operator's perspective, it is right to consider increasing income, so it
is better to analyze it with both social and management perspectives.
If some service outages are required to apply CBTC, the costs
(-benefits) of the shutdown must be considered.

Shin Seok-soo: The methodology is not clear. It is unclear how you

would prove your claim. It would be better to pick out the details
and refine them through quantitative analysis or try a different topic.

Lee Hwa-young: It can be a very useful paper if we put more effort

into proving why it is appropriate for the SE process to be applied at
the planning stage and can predict its effects quantitatively.

Narantunga: Further investigation and summary of relevant literature

are required. Because freight demand of TSMR is very difficult to
estimate, it would be better to use sensitivity analysis with scenarios
based one. For example, BAU (business as usual), negative perspective
and positive perspective three secenario are commoly used. Estimate
demand following the secenario and compare. You’d better to claim
that strategical approach is important because it is difficult to

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estimate, but you can estimate it with positive action so that you can
claim to your government need strong strategies to accomplish that
demend. Get the data you need quickly.

Narachimek: It seems you’d like to benchmark SMS and implement it

to Mongolian railway. To do it, you have to consider what is problem
and why you’d like to implement it. If I were you, I would find safety
statistics, compare with other countries, find reasons. One of the
reasons could be lack of SMS. Then find related papers about SMS
itself and cases of other countries. Find differences by items used in
other benchmarking countries and Mongolian railways and analysis
how to implement. Also, I would find methods to estimate
implementation effect to prove when I implement it to Mongolian
railway.

San Maung Maung: It can be a very useful paper if you examine data
written in a similar way and compare the measured values
internationally. First, define the required data, and to date arrange
what is available and what needs to be collected further.

Minh : The conclusion may vary depending on the subject of the

interview investigation. Clarify the limitations of the study, and
consider how to combine Delphi with AHP. Nevertheless, if the
interviewees are Vietnamese domestic expert, the conclusion of the
paper will be risk management recognized by Vietnamese experts. It
is important to let people know about the problems of PPP according
to the literature survey conducted in many countries when conducting
Delphi survey. In addition, if the AHP survey results are included in
Delphi and the paper is modified to the extent that "the importance
of risk management recognized by Vietnamese experts through
overseas cases," it could be a very good paper.

Aini: You must clarify your purpose. It is recommended that you

clarify whether the design of an integrated system is needed or an

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integrated system is needed. You’d better claim with the effect if you
want to. AHP may also be used for deciding weight by item.

Anurak: If literature research suggests that there are several ways to

set KPIs and measure performance, then you have to show logical
proofs of what problems exist and why develop Thailand model(why
not apply the overseas case?) Also, requires proof of why the model
is used, why Delphi, why AHP, and what is the meaning of model
developed from it.

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