DATE RIGHT,

MARRY RIGHT –
How to start, nurture
and transition your
relationship into
marriage

EBENEZER KOFI OWUSU

ii
Copyright © 2021 EBENEZER KOFI
OWUSU
ISBN: 978 – 9988 – 3 – 0976 – 3
All rights reserved. No part of this
publication may be used, or reproduced
in a database or retrievable system, or
transmitted in any form or by any means
without prior written permission, except
in the case of brief quotations or excerpts
in magazines, books, articles and reviews.
Unless otherwise stated, all scripture
quotations are from the King James
Version (KJV) Bible.
Request for information about the book
and the Author should be addressed to:
Kairos Books, Kumasi-Ghana
Tel: +233249156422/ +233249027753
Email: kairosbooks1@gmail.com
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REALISE CONCEPT CO. LTD.
GHANA, WEST AFRICA.
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E-Mail: realconceptgh@yahoo.com

iii
 DEDICATION
This book is dedicated to all singles,
dating partners and divorced couples
who intend to re-marry.

iv
 ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
I sincerely appreciate the help of Coach
KAB for the encouragement, support
and the love to come up with this book.
I appreciate the support of Doris Abena
Ayensu. My dear, thanks so much for
everything.
And to my affable friend, Asubonteng
Nicholas, thanks for all the support,
encouragement and the enlightenment
on some of the chapters in this book.

v
 FOREWORD
The subject of relationships that lead to
marriage could be likened to the tieing
of a knot. The quality of a tie is almost
traced to the quality of the knot. It will
determine if it’s a short or long tie. It will
be the reason for the tie being crooked or
straight, acceptable or not. In this Book,
Ebenezer Kofi Owusu has left almost no
stone unturned in trying to help people
going in dating relationships, to do it
right from the beginning.
He has done a good work in showing us
that an imbalanced relationship can end
up hurting in the future. Imbalance is a
pointer to an abomination. However,
when the two people are committed
to laying a good foundation, the future
of bliss is guaranteed. The richness of
the content of the book would make it
a good guide for intending couples in a
practical way. There are revelations here
that will challenge singles and young
adults to date right and build healthy
dating relationships.
Pastor Samuel Akwasi Aboagye

vi
President & Leader
Singles & Young Adult Ministry
Influence Leadership Network Group
Africa.

vii
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT
-DATE RIGHT, MARRY RIGHT
“Wisdom is required in all human
interactions. In Date Right Marry
Right, Ebenezer Kofi Owusu has done a
good job in laying open very real issues
and common-sense principles that can
revolutionize our relationship.
This is a good read for everyone who
wants to date right and marry right.”
LAWYER BUSAOSOWO BISONG,
NIGERIA (EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR,
BUSAOSOWO FOUNDATION &
CONVENER, FOR MEN ONLY)

“Coach, I just finished going through

your book — Date right, Marry right—
and I was like wow!
The content was so rich. I started
reading relationship books since the
last 5 years but this is exceptional.
Upon reading, it described exactly
what I was going through and I’m
excited that I have chosen the right
partner already based on the lessons.
And mind you, I got to realize some of
the mistakes I have been making since
viii
our date. I have started applying the
principles and even my Fiancée has
noticed the difference I have brought
in our intimate friendship these days.
It’s just a blessing meeting you and YOU
HAVE GAIN MY TRUST ONCE AGAIN.
How many books have you written so
far? How many courses do you have?
Just tell me, I will take all of them.
God bless you, Coach Eben.”
MR. NICHOLAS ASUBONTENG,
GHANA. (CEO OF ALL ROUND
SPORTS)

“Dear Success Ambassador,

Words will fail me to describe this book
- Date right, Marry right- its positive
effect is unmatchable; I have read a lot
of books on relationships but this one
is exceptional!
DATE RIGHT, MARRY RIGHT is not just
a book but an eye opener and key
guide to a sweet and fulfilling life.
This book is a blessing to humanity
so whenever and wherever you come
across this book, make sure you get

ix
it and read, from the start to the last
word, it has something vital for you.”
KELVIN ANTHONY, NIGERIA
(RELATIONSHIP AND LIFE COACH
FOUNDER -THE PERFECT SHIP)

“Coach, I just finished with the book,

DATE RIGHT, MARRY RIGHT....I must
say, you’ve done a very good work.
I must say, people are going to be
blessed by the book because there
are a lot of things, they need to hear
from that book especially fellow Adult
youths.
I really like the part that talks about
COMPATIBILITY. You’ve done so much
well and looking forward to getting
new books from you, God bless you
greatly.”
NANCY OPOKU, GHANA
(PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
COACH)

“Hello, Success Ambassador, indeed

I must say that you are a blessing to
humanity.

x
You are a blessing to this generation
and the next one to come.
I have vividly gone through your book-
DATE RIGHT-MARRY RIGHT and it’s
indeed, a golden nugget for lasting
dating relationship that can lead to
marriage.
And also, I have attended most of your
meetings and I really enjoyed them.
Your powerful words have one way or
the other impacted my life positively
I pray God richly bless you and your
family for me.
Seriously, I can’t wait to have a copy of
your next relationship book.
MISS DORIS ABENA AYENSU,
(NURSING STUDENT-GHANA)

“Date right, marry right book is an

eye opener and a life savior from
unnecessary and unwanted
relationships.
It has thought me to know myself, add
value to myself and find a partner who
shares and supports all of my dreams

xi
with me. You know why? Partners are
helpers and not just people we have
fun with.”
MISS ANNETTE OBIRI GYIMAH,
(NURSING STUDENT-GHANA)

“I can’t believe I just unlocked a great

chapter in my life. Date right, marry
right is not just a book but (a savior).
After going through the book, I’ve
discovered things beyond my
imagination as far as relationship is
concerned.
If there should be a book on relationship
for someone to read, then DATE RIGHT,
MARRY RIGHT is the plug. A very big
thank you to Coach Eben for helping
this generation.”
GODSWAY AMUZU, GHANA
(CEO OF SERENE ARTS)

“Hello, Coach Eben, I just finished

reading your book titled — Date right,
Marry right— and it was awesome!
I can’t imagine how fast I finished
reading the book because of how
interesting it was. Well detailed
explained.
xii
I have come across many articles
about relationship but I must confess
that the Date Right, Marry Right book
is exceptional. You know why? It is
straight on point and youth centered.
Well explained and easy to understand.
This is a problem-solving book. With
this book, no mistakes again.
I want to say God bless you so much
and give you more insight to bless us
with more books to shape our lives.
I need more copies for my friends,
because I am not ready to share mine. I
can’t let this book go. God bless you
Coach Eben.”
EMMANUEL AGGREY ASANTE,
GHANA (ACTUARIAL SCIENCE
STUDENT, UPSA)

“-Date Right -Marry Right is a great

piece for the youth most especially.
-Date Right -Marry Right teaches a
whole lot about dating relationships
you don’t really want to miss.
You’ll enjoy a nice piece with friendly
content, facts from diverse fields and
a cool vibe.

xiii
In all, Date Right, Marry Right is a must
read by anyone who aspires to be in a
relationship and make things work the
easiest.”
SOLOMON SEISI ARTHUR, Ghana
(CERTIFIED TEACHER)

Date right, Marry right book has been a

blessing to lots of young people as you
can see from the various testimonials
given by some of the people who have
read the book. It’s your turn to be blessed.

xiv
CONTENTS
Dedication iii
Acknowledgement iv
Foreword v
Introduction xv
Chapter 1
The ultimate truth about you 1
Chapter 2
Understanding the nitty gritty of a
relationship 5
Chapter 3
The blessing of singleness 15
Chapter 4
The concept of dating 21
Chapter 5
Understanding your personality type 43
Chapter 6
Do you know your love language? 51
Chapter 7
Are you medically compatible for
marriage? 63
Chapter 8
15 ingredients for a healthy dating
relationship 77
Special offers 91

xv
 INTRODUCTION
Dating has been one of the headaches
of young people as they grow up to find
life partners and become significant and
responsible adults in society.
As the world is growing faster, lots of
young people are also dying faster than
expected due to frequent breakups
resulting to broken-heartedness which
has a higher propensity of leading to
heart issues, depression and suicide if
care is not taken.
I have witnessed and seen lots of such
incidents and honestly, they are really
bad and uncalled for, but such is life, you
just have to learn, unlearn and relearn
from it and move on.
As singles and dating relationship Coach,
lots of clients have brought to my table
most of these issues.
This is why I’ve been inspired to share with
you the dynamics of dating and what
it’s all about, plus the various secrets to
having a thriving dating relationship that
leads to marriage. For lack of knowledge

xvi
my people perish, as said in the Holy
Bible (Hosea 4:6).
Lacking knowledge about something
is basically about being ignorant of
something important to your life.
Ignorance, I say, is a deadly disease, more
dangerous than Coronavirus.
The only cure for ignorance is significant
and accurate information, and that is
exactly what I’m going to give you. To all
those who have had bad relationships
and breakups, I’m sorry for all the pains
you have been through and I’m happy
you have this book right now with you
because you are specifically going to
know the root cause of the challenges
you faced in your past relationship(s)
and then hopefully, your next dating
relationship life will be a lovely one as
you have always dreamt of.
The best thing you can do now is to
forgive yourself for all that you have been
through in your past relationship(s) and
equally, forgive the person who broke
your heart. Life still goes on after all.

xvii
I have personally experienced breakups
and this is why I’m the right person
to share with you to the best of my
knowledge, experience, counseling,
research and what I have learnt and
applied from my affable mentors to help
you have a very amazing relationship.
Before we move to the first chapter, I
would love to let you know that in life,
to have the best of everything, you must
follow principles and get the best as
you have always wanted. Note that, as a
lazy man refuses to follow principles to
amass wealth, so will he forever be poor
in his life and so will every relationship
fall apart if the parties involved decide
to do their own things without following
rules and principles to guide their lives to
have a thriving relationship.
I will encourage you to read the whole
book till the last word. Digest the
information shared here and apply the
ones which best work for you.
Smile because your dating life is going to
be lovely.

xviii
I’m your “Love Doctor”. So, anything to
make you happy and successful in your
relationship makes me the happiest
person in the world.
All the best!
EBENEZER KOFI OWUSU

xix
 Chapter 1

THE ULTIMATE
TRUTH ABOUT YOU

“There is nothing on earth

that you cannot have once you
mentally accepted the fact that
you can have it.” Robert Collier

Y
ou are completely a very special
person with unique qualities and
abilities. You deserve the best of
a dating relationship which leads
to a lovely marriage.

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You are entitled to a wonderful life full of
success, happiness, joy and excitement.
It’s your portion.
Happy relationship, excellent health,
meaningful life and abundance of wealth
are your birthright.
You were created in the image of God
and as a result, you are entitled to success
in every aspect of your life especially in
your dating relationship and marriage.
You first won the battle between you
and the billions of sperms.
Now, what makes you think you deserve
anything less in life? Don’t be deceived,
you deserve the best relationship.
You are extraordinary in the history of
mankind. There has never been someone
like you and there will never be one too.
Nobody has your fingerprints. Can’t you
see you’re unique?
You are full of potential, capabilities,
and good qualities to help you attract
your dream life partner. You deserve
it. Just relax your mind, close your eyes
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and have a mental picture of the kind of

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relationship you want to have.
I believe it is amazing, right? Great! That’s
exactly what you deserve. Don’t settle
for less! That is your portion. You are
limitless to the kind of future family you
would want to build. It is time for you
to completely accept, understand and
appreciate yourself for who you are.
To have a healthy and extraordinarily
happy relationship starts with you. You
have to accept yourself, understand
yourself and appreciate yourself and
then you will appreciate love the most.
Love yourself first! To love is to GIVE
(John 3:16). So, give yourself the best of
treatment. Support your dreams, trust
yourself and believe in the possibility
of your dreams. Have faith in your
aspirations and have time for yourself.
Just GIVE yourself the kind of love you
seek to experience. That’s what it takes
to love yourself. Don’t hold any bad
assumptions about your personality
because you would be wrong.
Dr. Myles Munroe, in his book “In
Pursuit of Purpose” said something I love
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so much, and I quote:
“Your existence is a clear evidence that
this generation needs something that
your life contains.”
And this is 100 percent true. Someone
somewhere is waiting for you to perfect
his/her life by becoming his or her
partner. Some unborn children are
waiting to have you as a loving mum or
dad.
Proverbs 23:7 says “As a man
thinketh in his heart, so he is…. ”
Please, never have a bad picture of
yourself in your mind and heart.
You’re completely an amazing person, so
have a lovely and positive mental picture
of yourself and your dream relationship
with that handsome gentleman or that
beautiful lady.
You’re unique and the world appreciates
your presence.

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 Chapter 2

UNDERSTANDING
THE NITTY GRITTY
OF A RELATIONSHIP

“The best thing to hold onto

in life is each other” Audrey
Hepburn

R
elationship, which I define as the
feeling of connection between
two (or more) people, is so
critical to the success of your
dreams and aspirations in life.

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NB: You can’t find this definition in
any dictionary. Anything apart from
mutuality isn’t a healthy relationship to
me.
And by the way, I’m not talking about just
romantic relationships. But everything
we’re talking about in this chapter is
applicable to every kind of relationship,
be it friendship, family or romantic
relationships.
Remember, before a dating relationship,
everyone happens to be single. And this
chapter particularly seeks to guide us to
understand and analyze our relationships
with people and choose for ourselves the
type of relationship that could possibly
make us a better version of ourselves.
At the end of the day, it’s my prayer
that your relationships are going to be
healthy enough to inspire and challenge
you to do more for yourself as a person.
Your relationships could be either of the
3 categories I’m going to talk about right
away.

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Pay attention to each of them and
critically assess yourself and your
circle of influence to know the kind of
relationships you are having with people.
The beautiful part of this exercise is to
guide us in choosing who to date and
possibly marry. Don’t forget, you’re to
date rightandmarryright. Understanding
the nitty gritty of a relationship would
guide you in choosing who to possibly
date and marry as a life partner.
Be intentional about your relationships!
Choose to be in a healthy relationship!
Right! Let’s learn a little biology.
Let’s get to the first category of
relationship;

COMMENSALISM
This is an association between two
organisms (People) in which one benefits
and the other derives neither benefit nor
harm.
A clear example of this kind of
relationship is between a bird and a tree.
Apparently, a bird gets shade, support
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and protection from a tree, but what
does a tree gain from a bird? Remember,
I’m not talking about a flower where
pollination could possibly take place to
benefit both parties.
Now, in our day-to-day life, people come
our way with so many reasons, motives,
and mostly some just come our way to
rip us off by taking advantage of us.
They could possibly get lots of value, be
it any kind of support from you in so
many ways, but honestly you don’t get
any support or value from them in any
way. However, you’re not harmed from
the fact that they don’t support you
in any way. It’s very common in many
dating relationships.
Is this one too healthy relationship?
Avoid it!
Right, let’s get to the 2nd category of
Relationship.
The second category of relationship is
what I call;

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 PARASITIC RELATIONSHIP
You already know what a parasite is right?
So, a parasitic relationship is the type of
relationship where one person benefits
at the expense of the other. One benefits
and one gets hurt or suffers.
A clear example of this relationship is
between a Mosquito and Human.
This mosquito would bite you, suck your
blood and infect you with malaria, and
finally make life uncomfortable with its
noise after biting you.
Most often in some of our relationships,
people come our way, take advantage of
us and later hurt us or put us into bad
situations, be it emotional pains, financial
issues or any other thing that makes life
unbearable for us.
Funny enough, some people after getting
all the needed support from you, don’t
even appreciate you. They can even go
out there and tell people “shit” about
you. They are purely parasites.

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This is also a kind of relationship that
most of us find ourselves in.
Now ask yourself, is this really a healthy
relationship?
It’s time for you to be intentional about
your relationships.
Be vigilant, open your eyes, ears and
mind, please.
Learn your lessons and strive to build
healthy relationships with genuine
people, and of course, some people are
really genuine.
Over the years, I have strived building for
myself relationships that inspire and add
value to my life so I can truly become the
best version of myself. And what would
happen if you’re privileged to date and
marry someone who is so interested
in you becoming the best version of
yourself?
You know the answer, right? Let’s get to
the 3rd category.
Yes, it’s time for you to be intentional
about your relationships.
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Now, the 3rd category of relationship
and, of course, the best among the three
is;

MUTUAL RELATIONSHIP
As you can see from the first 2
categories, they’re all one-sided kind of
relationships. Only one person benefits,
and this is what mutuality has come to
defy. Mutuality is the new gig!
Mutual relationship is the healthy type
of relationship where two parties are
so much committed and assume the
responsibility to add value to the life of
each other. The parties are so committed
to the welfare of each other.
It really feels good having someone who
is so much interested in your life and
would be available to do whatever he or
she can to make your dreams come true,
and of course, you reciprocate to ensure
you are part of the person’s life too. That’s
the essence of mutuality.
As Audrey Hepburn said: “the best thing
to hold onto in life is each other”
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Now, look around your circle of
influence... those you call friends and
besties and those on your contact list.
Are you truly in any mutual relationship?
Huh!
I can’t answer that for you, you know.
All that I can say is that, the quality
of your relationships will definitely
determine the quality of your life.
There is something which happens to
be common in every lasting thriving
relationship; it takes resources, energy
and time to make every relationship
work.
If you’re not ready to commit and be
responsible for the betterment of
your relationship, don’t ever dream
of experiencing a lasting and thriving
relationship. There are ups and downs in
every relationship, but there is one thing
I know for sure, that you can only get
better and progress in life by dealing with
challenges, not by rejecting challenges.
Any relationship which is left to chance
would always be vulnerable to disaster in
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short time.
And don’t forget, who to be with is a
matter of choice. Just make the decision
to be with someone who would add
value to your life, not the one who will
subtract.
It’s my wish that you intentionally build
for yourself mutual relationships.
You can truly date right and marry right
when you are with someone you have
a mutual relationship with. Mutual
relationships birth healthy relationships.
I believe you are learning

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 Chapter 3

THE BLESSING OF
SINGLENESS

“Don’t be in a haste to
exchange your singleness for
frustration. Take your time
to make the most out of your
single life, date right and marry
right.” Ebenezer Kofi Owusu

T
his chapter is one of the most
important chapters to me. And
this is because lots of young people
in a way because of the negative
influence of the world see singleness as a

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curse or something which isn’t worth it.
Many young people have bad
perceptions about being single. Others
are also teased for being impotent in
many societies because they are single.
Let me tell you the truth. The best time
to do anything for yourself is when
you’re single. You get the opportunity
to have the whole 24 hours for yourself
to deploy yourself and find your life
purpose, dreams and aspirations and
work on them passionately.
Basically, your purpose is about what you
were born to do here on earth. Everyone
has his/her own, and that’s why you are
considered as a unique person.
To find it, you have to first examine your
inner self. Life is 80% internal and 20%
external, and what we see outside is
mostly a result of the impact our internal
influencers have on us. Your inner world
creates your outer world.
So, when you examine your inner self,
you will get to know your likes and
dislikes, strengths and weaknesses, loved
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and hated activities. Your purpose is
something you have interest in and it falls
within your strength. It’s something that
normally comes to you with ease. There
is always a force behind it such that, until
you do it, you don’t feel comfortable.
When you see something going wrong in
that aspect of human life, you feel so bad.
You have the strong zeal to make things
better for people in that area of life. So,
in your singleness, try to figure this out
and things would be easy when you get
yourself in a healthy dating relationship.
Singleness is for personal development
spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and
physically.
Don’t get me wrong, being in a
relationship takes time and energy.
That’s the hard truth. No one would be
single forever so why don’t you use the
time and the energy at this stage to do
something meaningful to your life?
Let me tell you the ultimate truth about
time. Time is life! Life is time! Period!
Life is just about the sum-total of
seconds. It’s the seconds that gives us
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minutes, hours, days, weeks, months,
years, decades, centuries etc.
And it’s within time that life operates.
That’s why if someone dies, on his tomb,
you will see something like 1980-2020.
Meaning that, the person’s life was
within the period of time between the
two dates.
If you waste your time while single, you
will eventually waste your life. And as a
matter of fact, the success of your dating
and marriage will depend largely on the
value you carry while single.
The days of singleness are for personal
development, purpose discovery and
having intimate relationship with your
supreme being (God). If you live your
single life the wrong way, expect your
dating relationship and marriage to go
wrong as well—garbage in, garbage out.
You can’t cheat on nature. Not even for
a second!
If you choose to judiciously make the
most out of your single life, you would
eventually be able to date right and
marry right.

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Always remember that, singleness
gives room for dating relationship and
marriage. No one was born married;
we were all born singles and you will
continue this phase of your life for some
time before the next door properly
opens for you.
And understand that everyone goes to
the market to buy valuable items.
And the value determines the price. I
believe you’re getting me?
So, in the same way, in life, your value will
determine who you can date/marry or
who can date/marry you.
I’m not talking about beauty or
handsomeness here. I’m not talking
about body shape or skin color also here.
I’m talking about your character, the
way you relate to people, how you carry
yourself in the society, your purpose,
dreams and aspirations in life. Also, the
impact you would want to make in the
world and your relationship with God.
Everyone wants to date or marry
someone with significant value that can
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help them grow up and become the best
version of themselves.
Lots of people are suffering from wrong
marriages and wrong relationships
because they didn’t know or appreciate
the blessing of singleness.
Others are dead from the consequences
of a wrong relationship which led to a
broken-heart, depression and eventually,
suicide. Don’t be a victim, life is beautiful
for those who know the essence of their
time. If you feel lazy to utilize the blessing
of singleness, then always expect to have
a bad dating and marriage relationships.
Please, let’s be single the right way, date
right and then marry right.
Charles Darwin once said, and I quote:
“A man who dares to waste an hour
of time has not discovered the value of
life.”
Thanks to singleness for being a blessing
to us.

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 Chapter 4

THE CONCEPT OF
DATING

“Healthy relationships should

always begin at the spiritual
and intellectual levels—the
levels of purpose, motivation,
interests, dreams, and
personality.” Dr. Myles Munroe

I couldn’t wait anymore to get to this

chapter.

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Thanks for your time to read the
free part of the DATE RIGHT
MARRY RIGHT BOOK.

I believe you’ve learnt lots of

amazing things to help you in life.

I believe it’s time to get the full book

and read everything for the success
of your life, dating and marriage.

Have a look at what you’re going to

learn from the rest of the chapters
in the book.

In chapter 4, you’ll get to

understand the purpose of dating.
Something which the so-called
relationship experts don’t tell you.

You’ll learn about compatibility in

dating, its essence and how to find
out if you and your dating partner
are compatible for marriage.

You’ll be exposed to my honest

opinion as to whether dating is
biblical.

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You’ll also learn about the 4 divine
secret principles for a successful
dating relationship that leads to
successful marriage.

In Chapter 5, you’ll learn about the

various personality types and their
influence on the success of your
dating relationship.

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