

“What was the

Best Time of Your
Life?”
Monday, 08 July 2019

During an interview a few weeks

ago, a reporter asked me, “What
was the best time of your life?”
You would think it should be
easy to come up with a few
stand-out eras or events but I
failed. Blank. Empty. Not even a
hint or two.

Since then, I've spent some

private time with that question
and of course, the first problem
is the question itself: how to
define “best”?

Does it mean healthiest?

Happiest? Most successful? I
don't know.

A little, light research around the

web turned up a lot of pages
addressing the question and
among them are advocates for
every age of life. The majority of
respondents, however, said they
were 20-something, drifting up
to 40 here and there, but they all
gave a similar answer:
childhood, teen years, college
and 20s were, in their eyes, the
best times of their lives.

Explanations for that choice

were also similar, variations on
this:

”Independence without
bearing responsibility or
burden. You have no family,
your parents don't require
your obligation yet, and
you are physically and
financially free to do
whatever the hell you
want.”

Does that – a period of no

responsibility – really represent
the best of life? Not for me. I
have no recollection of not
being responsible for at least
myself, and for others as needed
or wanted through the years. As
far as I can figure it,
responsibility to a variety of
people and entities is part of
what life is.

It's clear then that “best” means

different things to different
people but for now, let's go with
what I am guessing was the
reporter's intent: the time or
times in life that stand out
above others in a positive way.

I've had a lot of good times –

from being blessed with smart,
interesting friends to fascinating
jobs. During the decade I was a
producer for The Barbara
Walters Specials, I traveled the
U.S. and the world on someone
else's dime visiting places I
would never have gotten to on
my own.

There was another bunch of

years as part of the team that
created and then ran one of the
first two news websites
(cbsnews.com) at the start of
the internet era. Now, as for the
past 15 years, I've used what I
learned in all those earlier years
to turn out this blog.

For someone whose

enthusiasms are all over the
map, I couldn't have asked for
better kinds of employment -
although I am dangerously close
to admitting that during my life,
“best” has meant “entertaining”
and I'm not sure that's a good
thing. But it's too late to bother
with now; time is running short.

After all that explanation, my

answer is, “now, right now” - as
it would have been during each
of the eras (and others) I've
described – is the best.

Best is not necessarily

synonymous with happy and
sometimes, when terrible things
happened, I was miserable. But
the overall arc of my adult life is
that each year or era was the
best as it was happening.

That may sound disingenuous

from a woman living with
pancreatic cancer but I've
always been a realist: take what
life throws you way and if you
can't fix it, do the best you can
with it.

And so it is now. I'm trying.

What was the best time of your

life?

Posted by Ronni Bennett on Monday, 08 July

2019 |  Permalink |  Comments (43)

  

 Comments

Ages 40-52 during which I went

out of my way to accept
challenges and accomplish
long-time "dreams".

Posted by: Cop Car | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 06:26 AM

I think my "best" years were

from 30 to 42, not that there
weren't some bad times as well
as good ones. I truly enjoyed my
kids, the oldest being born when
I was about 30, I learned to play
and see the world afresh with
them, and during that time
started a business making art. I
think I was sort of on idle until
then.

Posted by: Celia | Monday, 08 July 2019

at 07:28 AM

Age 40-49 (currently 58). So

many reasons why: I had the
best job of my entire career. We
paid off our remaining mortgage
and car loan, bought and paid
off a crappy mountain cabin to
rehab ourselves and thoroughly
enjoyed the process as well as
the outcome. Debt free and
frugal feels carefree. I'm glad we
learned the difference between
a need and a want in our early
30s. Changed our stressful, debt-
laden life forever.

I am currently 58 and retiring on

July 26. We'll see if that becomes
the best time of my life :-)

Posted by: elle | Monday, 08 July 2019

at 07:39 AM

This is tough! Every stage is

remembered for it's good things
- the high lights, and those less
recede to the back of the room.
And I liked them all, especially
when I learned and grew during
those darker times, not knowing
whether reality or dreams
existed. All of them contributed
to what has been my life and
often the upside trumped (oh,
dear me, shut up) the negatives.
But both are constants. What
changed is attention and
attitude.

So my time is now, also. For me,

it's about awareness and
feelings felt.

Posted by: Simone | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 07:41 AM

It's fun to just think back and

remember all of the times,
thanks for the question, and
wishing you each moment
ahead of you good times too...
just did some gardening,
reading, studying, and listening,
all things I can do now that the
kids are grown, and husband is
rehabbing from his two heart
surgeries this year. (Think
making playdough animals with
my kids and grandkids comes to
mind, as happiest times)

Posted by: Martha Kaplan Backer |

Monday, 08 July 2019 at 07:56 AM

I'm 77. There were two times. The

first i can narrow down to the
moment. I was a young married
mother of 2 perfect little girls,
living in our new house, both
kids in bed, lying in the
hammock in the backyard on a
beautiful evening looking up at
the sky and thinking "It doesn't
get better than this." It didn't.
The second was later in life
when the younger girl graduated
college and I celebrated my new
freedom from the responsibility
of raising kids as a single mom
by buying a red convertible.

Posted by: R. Prose | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 07:57 AM

I didn't know the answer to this

until late in life, but for me, the
best moment is always the
present moment. That's the only
time we can be fully conscious
of being alive.

Posted by: Jean K Gogolin | Monday, 08

July 2019 at 08:05 AM

Actually, two times. I think the

very best was when I met wife
#3 (I was her #3, also). I was in
my early 40's, she was in her late
20's. We met, moved in together
a week later, and are still
together 32 years later. We both
consciously decided not to have
children, although she has a
daughter and I none. Now we are
retired together and enjoying
THAT freedom. I only wish we
had met 11 years earlier, but that
is "water under the bridge". My
other great time I was thirty with
wife #2. I became very involved
in local and state politics ending
with my becoming Mayor of a
small town. I learned a lot, like
the saying: "Experience is what
you get when you were
expecting something else.". It
was my last foray into politics,
although I still
volunteered until about age 45.
There were other great times in
this wide world and beautiful
country of ours, but the two
times I mentioned are most
important. B

Posted by: Bernie JMW Fleming |

Monday, 08 July 2019 at 08:08 AM

What a great subject for a post

Ronni. I thoroughly enjoyed
reading it and I know it will
make many of your readers
think. I did. I believe two times
for me were the best. First, from
my 18th to 30th years. For my
18th birthday my father gave me
a car and the use of the
apartment downtown Paris, so it
was easy to get around. Then
after school I had a glamorous
job in an American music
publishing co. off the Champs-
Elysees in Paris where I met
famous singers like Edith Piaf,
Charles Aznavour and free
access to concerts like Duke
Ellington, Dizzie Gillespie and so
forth. Then I went to San
Francisco for a trip in 1961 and
loved the city, met my husband
and we would go to rock and
folk concerts and were married
during the “year of love.” We
lived in SF until I was 30 (1970.) I
thought then that all cities in the
US were like San Francisco
where everyone loved everyone.

The second time was: from my

40th year to retirement I worked
in a large corporation in GA with
foreign trainees, made friends
with many and visiting many of
them in their home countries –
went to 66 countries not
including going back home to
Paris twice a year. I had to take
the trainees, while here, to trips
through the US during their time
off – so much fun, and
everything paid. But still, I enjoy
life now even though my
husband died, because of being
able to read blogs like yours,
meeting blog friends and not
feeling isolated because of my
blog. All in all it has been fun all
along, really.

Posted by: vagabonde | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 08:15 AM

The best time? The arena was

filled to capacity. Only the stage
was lit. It seemed that I was the
only person in the world as I
walked across the wooden floor
boards to the man at the
microphone, wearing a long
purple robe, holding in his hand
my dream.

The many honor Society cords

hanging from my shoulders
swung with each step. I still
recall the disbelief that this was
really me. But it was. I really was
graduating summa cum laude,
age 56. The first person in my
family to graduate from college.

It had been a very long road to

that point. Working full-time,
going to school full-time at an
age where most people are
working towards a fulfilling
retirement. Tears, exhaustion,
frustration. Where did I get the
gumption? To this day I do not
know.

I went on to have a fulfilling 15

year career.

Now I’ve been retired for 8 years.

And in those eight years I have
had so many more awesome
times, best times. More than I
had ever dreamed of. But the
very best time was that night
when I held the tangible proof of
my dream in my hands. My
future!

Posted by: Caroline | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 08:21 AM

Thinking back, it's more like

"best moments" rather than best
times--the births of my two
children--followed by "times"
that were up and down; fetching
cow dung and planting a garden
with baby on back on our
farmette--preceded and
followed by "times" up an down;
feelings of pride and satisfaction
in my careers--yet with
problems also; travel to novel
and exotic places. Although
there were many best
"moments", my best time is right
now, which consists of ample
time to pursue anything I wish
without financial strain, in
continuing good health. A good
question to ponder.

Posted by: Nana Royer | Monday, 08

July 2019 at 08:36 AM

I just read Caroline’s comment

and congratulate her on her best
time, her graduation. It made me
think about special best events.
Two come to mind: finally going
to Dubai in the late 1980s (way
before it was built up and
fashionable) to visit my trainees.
Their sisters and wives having
long dresses made up for me so I
could eat on the floor with
them, giving me perfume and
incense and having my hands
painted with henna tattoos -
laughing all the time. An ex
trainee, a pilot, taking me to his
special reserve of racing camels,
in the desert near Oman, where I
pet a baby camel, so sweet and
affectionate with lovely fur.

The second time: taking my

youngest daughter to southeast
Asia after her Master’s
graduation and stopping in
Luang Prabang, Northern Laos,
taking a little shallow boat on
the Mekong to the thousand
years old Pak Ou Caves
containing 4,000 Buddha icons;
such an emotional moment. My
special events I guess were made
of times totally out of my
regular world.

Posted by: vagabonde | Monday, 08 July

2019 at 08:40 AM

The first 17 years of my marriage.

I was the most happy, secure
emotionally and finally felt
settled.

Then we retired, he changed , we

were not as happy and he died.

Now in my older years (70s), I’ve

truly found myself, have total
freedom in decisions and
choices, and I’m content in my
life.

I do get lonely at times, do regret

that my marriage did not follow
the American romantic dream of
perfection into old old age and
do regret that our country is
being run by such corruption
and so many people are under
that spell.

But finally being who you were

meant to be is an awesome
feeling.