My Secret Heart

By: Paula Earecka A. Diesmo

I’ve seen him once and yet he changed my life,

His smile, his style are like a sharp knife,

So dangerous but I couldn’t resist,

For every bit of me has been abducted by him

How did this happen for just one summer,

That every bit of me was like drunk in liquor,

But just like magic he turned me into someone I don’t know,

A girl who would love you more as if she would break any law.

Oh why? Why must it be you?

Of all people why did I fall for you?

A man which I never thought I would love,

A man that would never love me back

I can’t tell my feelings for you directly,

So this is last thing I could do to confess my feelings perfectly,

To the man who I fell in love in just one summer,

I wish that I could see you smile just for me to remember,

That compared to the girl you hold hands with,

I am a complete sucker,

But don’t worry just like this summer ,

I’ll try my best to find someone who could be my perfect forever.

 Childish

By: Paula Earecka A. Diesmo

Dear childhood bestfriend,

Does our frienship need to end?

Can’t I choose love and friend?

Why must this two need to rend,

I love you, you know that right?

Ever since we were a child,

You were my first love and my so called mister right,

So why cant you be mine?,

Cant you love me apart from being your friend,

I already do things that you could see me as a women

Just a Phase

By: Paula Earecka A. Diesmo

The thought of being invited in a party,

Going home laughing with many memories,

The joy of being with your classmate late at night,

Im not a rebel nor wild,

But for once I want to experience the life of a normal child,

To laugh by hanging out in a party,

Not because of its food or the music it provide,

But the idea of being invited by someone because you are worthy to be with them,

And they like you for who you are,

When I get older and be successful one day,

 I’ll invite everyone in my room,

Either I hate them or like them,

Because I want them to feel that they are welcome and not hated,

Although they don’t speak ill,

But their actions is enough for me to know,

That I am not the person that they want to hang along,

Because I am a person who is not worthy to be liked,

And spent time to have fun with,

My dear self in the near future,

When you read this again what would you do?

Are you still the same me in the future?

A girl who have everything but nothing,

A girl who is full of happiness but lonely?

Will you laugh when you read this and say I’m crazy,

Or would you smile and tell me that I’m wrong.

Because I am a person that can be spent time with and be a part of others memories.

Dear future self,

You know I was hurt and jealous, not because I was not able to go to her birthday, but because I
wasn’t able to be thought as a person who is worthy to be invited. Am I a person that is to be hated or
am I a person that is just a brain. You know I am one of the top yet I feel like I am at the bottom. Am I
greedy, for not being contented of what I have.

I do have a bestfriend, but I still don’t know how long will she able to injure when she’s with me,
am I selfish?, irritating, prideful,greedy, despiteful, lonely, sad, empty?, hey my future self , you are a
christian , but why do you this way, the feeling of being alone when you have GOD. You don’t need this
worldy humans , but still why do you lust to have some fun with them, not in materials but in thoughts.
 If I am able to top everything does this secure my future being happy, I am blessed spiritually, for
being able to know God at such a young age , and again, I rook time to rest a bit, and my future self, I’m
back from being normal again, I realized that I don’t need those party, because afterall, I wont find my
true happiness in those kind of worldly things.

Ps. Stay strong and don’t give up, if things might happen and it truly does hurt, just lay down and
imagine the outcome of the possible future, either its positive or neegative find a best solution to face it
head on.

And don’t worry, you have your parents and sisters, and if not them , GOD is always there.