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Finding Friends at Any Age: But, I Don't Have A Community of People Like Me
Finding Friends at Any Age: But, I Don't Have A Community of People Like Me
Last night at the pub I wrote my phone number down, to give to a man
I’d just met.
I wanted to add some words to give context. What words would make it
okay? I was giving my number to a married man with two little kids, in
front of his drunk bachelor party friends, while my boyfriend stood
beside me. At the door to the pub my confidence failed me (or my
better judgment won) and I crumpled the note in my pocket.
Why did I want, so very much, to stay in touch with this drunk tourist I
barely knew? I’m not lonely. I have friends and acquaintances and long
distance messenger chat groups and a close-knit family. And I love
spending time alone. All my favourite hobbies are solitary.
Despite the loud music and echoing tile floor and raucous bachelor’s
party, my new friend and I managed to talk about the value of self
expression, how to teach critical thinking, parenting dilemmas around
YouTube videos, and the existential crisis of today’s writers and
creative thinkers.
The bachelor party was migrating four blocks to the night club. I
missed my chance to give my new friend my phone number: I won’t see
him again. That flicker of friendship puffed out, and I felt immediate
grief. I wasn’t just mourning the loss of this one person. I was sad
because, having felt that…