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What is radical
self-love?
Reviewed by
Eric Patterson LPC

Editorial policy

Loving yourself is one of the most radical acts you

can do in a society that places so much emphasis on
appearance, perfection, productivity, and meeting
expectations that aren’t realistic across the board
for all abilities and bodies. So many of us struggle
with feeling like there is something wrong with us
or that we aren’t good enough. And, over time,
these negative feelings can harm us, even leading to
severe mental health conditions, like depression,
anxiety, or an eating disorder.

Engaging in radical self-love involves loving and

accepting your entire self, even the parts you may
consider flaws Once you choose radical self-love
 consider flaws. Once you choose radical self love,
your entire perspective and attitude can change.
You can begin to give yourself the care you deserve
and feel better about yourself. It may sound silly or
over-the-top, but it will make more sense when you

start to let go of limiting beliefs and embrace

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(The information in this article has been adapted
from The Body is Not An Apology, “an international
movement committed to cultivating global radical
self-love and bodily empowerment” founded by
Sonya Renee Taylor.)

1 sources cited

Last updated on February 9, 2023 Self help

Radical self-love
defined
 Radical self-love involves accepting yourself, caring
for yourself, and knowing you are more than
enough, and inherently worthy of love, respect, and
compassion. Loving yourself is a radical act in a
society that constantly tells us we aren’t good

enough, we need to lose weight, have bigger

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The society we live in doesn’t want us to love
ourselves. It wants us to hate ourselves, so we feel
shame, buy into diets, detoxes, cleanses, and
exercise equipment, accept cruelty and abuse, and
don’t demand change. These concepts are so
ingrained in our brains, thanks to the messages we
get from all angles and media outlets, we often
aren’t even aware of how these insidious forces
work. But when we choose to radically love
ourselves, we are rejecting everything we’ve been
taught to hate in ourselves. We are forging a new
and loving path to happiness.

Radical self-love is an ongoing process that involves

unlearning toxic beliefs about inferiority and body
image and replacing them with self-acceptance and
compassion. And it’s not just a belief that you are
more than good enough; it’s taking action by caring
for your body and mind. It involves engaging in
activities and practices you truly enjoy, not things
you feel obligated to do because you think you
“should” do them to be “healthy.” Because this
mindset often backfires and does more harm than
good, leaving you feeling much worse. Being
mindful, intuitive eating, and seeking out activities
and movement you actually like are a few things
you can do to practice radical self-love.
 Why radical?

This movement defines radical as extreme,

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deviation from norms. Their self-love is radical,1604
as
in, anarchist, as in, emphasizing social, economic,
and political reforms.

The Body is Not An Apology believes self-love is the

origin of our relationships with ourselves and our
bodies and society is responsible for the
discrimination, body terrorism, and shame we
internalize and experience. Self-love is innate. We
are born loving ourselves. We only need to return to
our origins.

This movement holds that radical self-love enables

us to engage in radically loving others, in leading
our lives with compassion, empathy, and mutual
care and respect. The Body is Not An Apology is a
powerful movement, because they assert that the
closer we move to radical self-love, the more we
become empowered and a force for societal change.

What is body terrorism?

The Body is Not An Apology refers to body
terrorism as the violence associated with the hatred
of othered bodies, such as people of color, queer
and transgender people, people living in larger
bodies, and people living with disabilities.
 From racist violence, like slavery and lynching, to
forced sterilization of disabled people and sexual
assault and murder of queer and transgender
people, especially trans women, body terrorism is
prevalent throughout the world. And this violence

is responsible for countless deaths and physical

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consequences caused by shame, like eating 1604

disorders, self-hatred, stigma, and internalized

homophobia, transphobia, anti-Blackness, ableism,
sizeism, and beyond.

Loving yourself in the face of global body terrorism

is a radical, self-empowering act. It shifts the power
from external forces to ourselves. We have
something that no one can take from us, and that’s
a deep and loving relationship with our bodies.

How to practice
radical self-love
After years of learning to hate yourself, your body,
and who you are, it can be difficult to just flip a
switch and begin loving yourself. It will take time
and practice. But everyone is capable of learning to
love themselves.

Here are some tips on how to practice radical self-

love:

Love every part of you: This includes loving

your perceived flaws—which may not even be
l fl I l i f
 actual flaws. It means loving every part of your
body and your personality. It means loving
your quirks and your neuroses.
Be your own very best friend: This means
treating yourself how you would treat your

best friend in the world and practicing

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Listen to yourself over others: It can be easy to
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let the overwhelming voices of others drown

out your own voice, but set an intention to
listen to yourself above everyone else. You are
the expert on your body, your mind, and your
heart, and you know who you are and that no
one can take your worth from you.
Write down and recite affirmations: Write
down a list of affirmations that resonate with
you and put them somewhere where you will
see them every day, such as above your desk.
Commit to reciting them several times a day,
not just saying the words, but really tuning
into them.
Question your negative self-beliefs when they
arise: If you find yourself thinking negatively
about yourself, whether it’s about the type of
treatment you deserve or criticism about your
body, you need to challenge these thoughts,
where they came from, and why you’re
thinking them, so you can then replace them
with more loving and generous thoughts.
Do things that bring you joy: Doing things you
love can help you feel better about yourself. If
you love to play guitar, carve time out every
day to play it and really be in the moment.
P i i d C i i d
 Practice gratitude: Creating a gratitude
practice can help you to keep things in
perspective and to acknowledge all of the
wonderful things in your life. You can try
writing down three things you’re grateful for
when you wake up in the morning or at night.
If loving yourself doesn’t come easy at first, don’t
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to hate ourselves and pick apart our flaws, so be1604
gentle and forgiving with yourself. As time goes on,
you’ll find it’s easier and easier to not only accept
but celebrate who you are.

Resources
In this article 1. Taylor, S.R. (2021). The Body is Not an Apology,
Second Edition: The Power of Radical Self-
Radical self-
love defined Love. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.

How to practice
radical self-love

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 Further reading

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