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Episode 2 Narrative ANNIE [reading email message/replying to email] Whats he like? Oh. Argentinian tall handsome.

. Oh, wow, fantastic! A new boyfriend for you maybe! [Laughs/sneezes] Maybe, but dont tell Bridget! BRIDGET Hector please, call me Gigi. ANNIE Oh Hector, call me Gigi. Oh. [sending email] Must go. More news later. A. BRIDGET Is Hector still asleep? ANNIE Yep. BRIDGET Aah. Hector, wakey-wakey. Come on, rise and shine. Hector makes snoring noises ANNIE Sweet! BRIDGET Oh, good morning. [Sneezes] HECTOR Oh, good morning. [Sneezes] ANNIE Uh, no, no, no, good morning, ah-ah-ah. HECTOR Good morning, ah-ah-ah. ANNIE No Hector, I have a cold. BRIDGET And so have I. HECTOR Oh you have a cold, Bridget.

Episode 2

Hector Goes Shopping

BRIDGET Yes, I have a cold. ANNIE Yes, we have a cold, so lets begin again. Good morning. HECTOR Good morning. BRIDGET Oh never mind. Hector, would you like some New pyjamas? HECTOR Mmm? BRIDGET Hector, please excuse me for a moment. Annie, bathroom. Now! HECTOR Good morning. NICK Good morning. Is it fancy dress? HECTOR Fancy dress? Yes. NICK Oh, nice. Hey, nice car, ay. HECTOR I have this car at home. NICK Wow, you have this car at home. HECTOR Ahm. NICK Girls must love you. HECTOR Girls, no. NICK No? Hector, can I tell you something? HECTOR Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

OK. NICK The car looks good. HECTOR Ah-ay. NICK Ay. So you must look good too! Ha-hmm? HECTOR I look good! NICK No. You dont look good. But I can help. HECTOR OK! NICK OK! BRIDGET Hectors clothes are awful! ANNIE Oh, theyre so old fashioned! BRIDGET I know, Ill take him shopping. ANNIE But Bridget youre so busy that Ill take him shopping. BRIDGET No, its all right, Ill take him shopping. ANNIE But theres no problem, Ill take him shopping. BRIDGET I said Ill take him shopping!! Sound of sneezing NICK You need, you need a oh hi, babe! BRIDGET Oh its you, Nick. ANNIE Oh hi, Nick. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

NICK Hector has asked me what clothes to wear. BRIDGET Yeah, right. NICK You need a look, like on a fast bike. BRIDGET No, no, no, no, Hector, dont listen to Nick, listen to me. HECTOR OK. BRIDGET You need a designer look. ANNIE No, no, no, Hector, thats not for you. You need, you need a cowboy look. NICK No, no, a leather jacket. BRIDGET A bandanna and a vest. ANNIE A denim shirt. NICK A motor bike! BRIDGET Designer! ANNIE Cowboy! HECTOR Ah, stop!! OK, I will go shopping. BRIDGET What? ANNIE On your own? NICK But you need us! HECTOR Ah, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

ANNIE How? What will you say? HECTOR Erm NICK Its OK, leave it to me. I am the shopkeeper, you are the customer. HECTOR Uh? NICK This is a shop. I sell, you buy. HECTOR Oh, OK. Oh, ding-dong. Good morning. NICK Good morning! Can I help you? HECTOR Yes. II NICK I would like HECTOR I would like a jacket, please. NICK Trousers. HECTOR Uh? NICK I would like a pair of trousers please. HECTOR Oh, I would like a pair of trou-sers please. - And a shirt. NICK No. shoes. I would like a pair of shoes, please. HECTOR I would like a pair of shoes, please. And a cat for my head. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

NICK I think you mean a hat. HECTOR Eh? NICK This is a cat! HECTOR [Laughs] A cat for my head! ANNIE Hector, come shopping with me. BRIDGET Or me. ANNIE No, me. BRIDGET Hes my pen friend! NICK All right! Me, you and you will go shopping for Hector a little bit each I will go to the shoe shop. ANNIE And I will go to the clothes shop. BRIDGET No, Ill go to the clothes shop! ANNIE OK, Ill just buy the shirt. BRIDGET Ill buy the trousers! NICK Good! Hah! HECTOR Good. ANNIE Right, lets go! Oh, no, I completely forgot! We need, eggs, lemons and dog food. Oh, its all right, Ill do it on line later. HECTOR Eggs, lemon, dog food. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

ANNIE Oh well done, Hector. BRIDGET Bye Hector. Oh and dont answer the phone, it might be the tarantula. HECTOR OK. NICK Bye Hector, be good. And if you cant be good, be careful. Ha-ha. HECTOR Eh? NICK Never mind! ANNIE [sending email] Nadia I have a cold. Bridget has a cold and Hector has BRIDGET New pyjamas. ANNIE [sending email] Terrible pyjamas. Oh, you should see them Nadia. They are so funny! BRIDGET [sending email] Hi, sweetie. I wanted to buy Hector some new clothes on my own. Ill take him shopping. But Annie and Nick said they wanted to shop for Hector as well. So guess what? Were all going shopping for Hector. NICK Me, you and you can go shopping for Hector, a little bit each. BRIDGET [sending email] What will he look like? NICK [sending email] And Annie thinks Hector needs a cowboy look. ANNIE He needs a cowboy look! NICK [sending email] Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

But I think he needs a biker look like me! Yeah! NICK You need a look, like on a fast bike! HECTOR Good morning sir. I would like a cat for my head! Oh, room service. Hello, I would like an egg for my head, ha-ha! Lemons for my head! Intercom buzzes HECTOR Oh, dog food for my head. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Whos that? HECTOR Aah! The tarantula! Landlady [Speaking on intercom] I said, whos that? HECTOR Hello. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Wheres Bridget? HECTOR Erm, where is Bridget? Me, I am Bridget. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] I dont believe you. HECTOR Yes, I have a cold! [Sneezes] Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Oh, Im sorry. HECTOR [Sneezes] Oh, thank you. [Sneezes] Dog barks HECTOR Ssh! Charlie! Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

Is that a dog? HECTOR No, no, it is not a dog, Annie has a cold also! Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Oh, poor Annie. HECTOR Thank you. [Sneezes] Now goodbye! [Sneezes] Oh, oh ole! I am Hector, I speak Englis Eggs, lemons, dog food. Eggs, lemons, dog food. HECTOR Oh hi, [erm] good, good afternoon Annie. ANNIE Good afternoon Hector. I bought this for you. HECTOR Oh, what is it? ANNIE Try it on. HECTOR Eh? ANNIE TRY IT ON! HECTOR TRY IT ON? Oh, try it on! Oh, ah. BRIDGET Wheres Hector? ANNIE In the bathroom. BRIDGET Good. Ill give this to him. ANNIE Its OK, Ill give it to him! BRIDGET No, its all right. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

Sound of knocking on door BRIDGET Hector ANNIE Hector BRIDGET Ive got something for you. HECTOR Oh, OK. Come in. BRIDGET Spoil sport! NICK Hector! Hector! HECTOR Hello. NICK Here are your clothes, you will look so cool. HECTOR Cool? NICK Co-ol. HECTOR Cool! NICK Nice melons! BRIDGET Melons? Who are those from? ANNIE Ah, I think Hector has been shopping online. Oh, Im really thirsty, I need a drink. BRIDGET But we dont need any melons!

ANNIE Well he did try! And he bought some eggs. Yeah, just a few. Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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NICK [sending email] Yo Dan! Hector did the shopping today. Nice melons. He bought one hundred and forty four eggs. ANNIE Just a few. NICK And ten melons instead of ten lemons. What an idiot. Ha! HECTOR I would like some eggs please. I would like some lemons please. And oh, dog food for my head! Ha, ha, ha, thank you! ANNIE [sending email] I went shopping for Hector today and bought him something really cool! I cannot wait for him to try it on. ANNIE TRY IT ON. BRIDGET [sending email] I went to the clothes shop and bought Hector a really trendy outfit! He will look just like David Beckham! BRIDGET Ive got something for you! ANNIE So how did Hector do the shopping? Ah-ha! Hector ordered ten melons instead of ten lemons. Oh, an easy mistake, he did try. BRIDGET Yes, he did try. NICK And what about the eggs? ANNIE OK, eggs. You buy a dozen eggs, yeah. NICK Yep, a dozen is ten. BRIDGET A dozen is twelve, stupid! Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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NICK I know! ANNIE Well Hector has put the number twelve here. NICK Well thats OK, thats one box. ANNIE No, he ordered twelve boxes. BRIDGET One hundred and forty four. ANNIE Now, dog food. NICK Ha, ha, I cant wait! HECTOR OK, Im ready! NICK Were ready! BRIDGET Enter! HECTOR Do you like it? Well? ANNIE Ah [erm] I like the shirt. BRIDGET I like the sarong. NICK I like the shoes. HECTOR So, am I co-ol? NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE [Erm]. HECTOR No. Im not cool. NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE [Erm] no. HECTOR Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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So, I will go shopping. NICK Here we go again. Hector! You cant go out there on your own. You went shopping on the Internet. HECTOR Yes. NICK Ha-ha! You ordered melons instead of lemons and too many eggs. Have you ever been to a supermarket? HECTOR No. My NICK Who are these? HECTOR My NICK Servants. HECTOR Yeah, my servants.. NICK Servants. Now I understand. BRIDGET Come on Hector, I will teach you how to shop, Hector ANNIE Till you drop. Bridget and I will be the shopkeepers. BRIDGET And you are our customer! HECTOR OK. [Clears throat] Good afternoon. BRIDGET Good afternoon! ANNIE Can I help you sir? Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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HECTOR Eh? BRIDGET What would you like to buy? HECTOR Oh, I would like some ANNIE Clothes! HECTOR Yes, I would like some clothes, please. BRIDGET What size? HECTOR Eh? BRIDGET What size. HECTOR I dont know. BRIDGET Ill have to measure you then. Arms up please. HECTOR Eh? ANNIE Arms up, please. HECTOR Oh, arms up, please. BRIDGET Chest. Ooh! One hundred and twelve centimetres! ANNIE Chest, one hundred and twelve centimetres. BRIDGET And waist. Eighty two centimetres. ANNIE Waist, eighty two centimetres. BRIDGET And l-e-g!! [laughs] NICK Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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Ill do that! BRIDGET No, its OK! NICK [Clears throat] Eight-ty seven centimetres! BRIDGET Now, do you like these trousers? ANNIE Do you like this shirt? HECTOR Ye-es. BRIDGET Good, thats [erm] Five thousand pounds. HECTOR OK. ANNIE No, no, no Hector. Five thousand pounds is, is eight thousand dollars! HECTOR Yeah. BRIDGET Its too much, its too expensive. NICK Not for Hector! HECTOR So, I am ready to go shopping! Ha ha! ANNIE Good luck. BRIDGET Yeah, good luck. NICK Youll need it! BRIDGET & ANNIE [Sneezing] BRIDGET Wheres my lemon drink, Nick? ANNIE Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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Nick, are there any more tissues? NICK All right, Im coming as fast as I can! OK. ANNIE Oh, I feel awful. BRIDGET Oh, me too. Nothing will make me feel better. Sound of knocking on door ANNIE Oh, can you get that please Nick? NICK Oh, its only Hector. HECTOR Well, is it cool? NICK Wow, man! Well done! You look great! HECTOR I would like a shirt, please. BRIDGET Excellent! Oh the clothes are super! HECTOR And a pair of trou-sers. ANNIE Oh, you are clever, Hector! HECTOR And a pair of shoes, please! [Laughs] I have been shopping! Sound of intercom BRIDGET Oh, Ill get it. Hello. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Its me. BRIDGET Oh, hello. Its the tarantula! Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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How are you? Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Fine, thank you. BRIDGET Oh, good, good. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Hows your cold? BRIDGET Hows my cold? Well how did you know I have a cold? Landlady [Speaking on intercom] You told me this morning. HECTOR Me, I am Bridget. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] I dont believe you. HECTOR Yes, I have a cold. [Sneezes] Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Oh, Im sorry. HECTOR Thank you. [Sneezes] BRIDGET Yes, silly me! I told you this morning. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Why are four hundred tins of dog food here for Annie? BRIDGET Pardon? I dont know. Well, how strange! Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Four hundred tins.

BRIDGET Yes, thats a lot of tins. Well I really dont know. Landlady [Speaking on intercom] Can you ask Annie? Episode 2 Hector Goes Shopping

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BRIDGET Yes, Ill ask Annie, goodbye. The tarantula said, why have four hundred tins of dog food downstairs? ANNIE Four hundred tins? NICK, BRIDGET & ANNIE Hector!! COMMENTARY [v.o.] Next time in EXTRA. Annie goes dating on the Internet and so do Nick and Hector, but do they like their dates? Extra dont miss it!

Episode 2

Hector Goes Shopping

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