tears for the devil (and if it's a sin, grieve for me)

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/48808558.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: F/F, F/M, Multi
Fandom: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero
Academia (Anime & Manga)
Relationship: Toga Himiko/Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku/Uraraka Ochako
Character: Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku, Toga Himiko, Mongoose Habuko
Additional Tags: 395 Hate Mail, Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia Manga
Spoilers, Chapter 395 spoilers, Symbiote Toga Himiko, Basically, Living
Together, as in 'inside your own skull', I recognize canon has made a
decision, but given it's a stupid-ass decision, i've elected to ignore it
Language: English
Series: Part 2 of angel's love (devil's due)
Stats: Published: 2023-07-23 Words: 1,128 Chapters: 1/1

tears for the devil (and if it's a sin, grieve for me)
by TequilaBard

Summary

In the aftermath of the Final War, Uraraka Ochako has to contend with her new reality, one
bereft of Toga Himiko.

Notes

See the end of the work for notes

She manages to keep herself in her bed to rest (every time she went to get up, she felt warmth
around her shoulders and a brush of something across her lips, and it was as maddening as a half-
forgotten benediction) for about a day before she has to get up and move. Her nurse, Mongoose
Habuko (and Tsu was going to get an earful later for keeping that cutie away from her) had gotten
her some actual clothes and a request to keep inside the hospital. And that Izukun was awake.

Izuku… she was knotted up over him. She confessed! All those boiling emotions in her chest
finally came out, and it felt so good. The next step should be, obviously, to confess to Izuku
himself.

But the girl she confessed to was dead. She promised to share blood, talk about romance, life, with
Himiko-chan, and…

…and she was dead. Warmth and reassurance panged in her chest, but it wasn’t enough to lift her
mood.
She still wanted to see Izukun, though. She looked up and realized she was standing right outside
his room, oddly enough. Maybe she wandered this direction? Her legs just… took her where she
needed to go. She squared her shoulders and knocked, before opening the door.

Izukun was… wan, tired, and drawn. She thought she’d seen him at his worse when they finally
pulled him off the streets and forced him into a bath, but… he’d never looked so defeated.
“Izukun?” He started, looking up.

“Ura-... Toga-san?!” Her eyebrows knitted, and she shook her head.

“It’s me, Dekkun. Ochako? Did Shig-” Shiggy almost slipped through her lips, and she took a
second to rework the sentence. “Did Shigaraki hit your head that hard?” His face fell again, and she
stepped close, taking the seat near the bed. “...I’m so sorry, Dekkun. I heard about what
happened.”

“...it’s okay, Uraraka-san. I managed to talk to him, before…. before.” His fingers brushed against
his chest, right over where his heart was. “He was a scared kid, you know? He just… wanted to
lash out at everything else.”

“I’m so sorry Dekkun.” Her hand reached out and brushed against his, before curling around it, and
squeezing gently. “Is there anything I can do?”

“...I don’t know.” His hand tightened, a little, around her fingers. “I think I just need some time.”
He looked up at her, smiling a little. Not a lot, but it was a start! “So is Toga…?”

Oh. Yeah. He’d want to know. “Himiko-chan… didn’t make it either. From what Jirou-san told
me, she… healed me, I think? But she… died?” She put her finger on her chin, thinking over what
everyone’s told her. “She transformed into me, then transformed into me. Jirou-san described it as
a ‘wave of transformation goo’. But…” Her finger ran down her stomach, right where her scar was.
“She used her quirk like a hero, right at the end.” A pulse of reassurance and love and safety
washed over her.

“...Uraraka-san? Are you okay?” She started, a chirp ripping from her throat. “...Uraraka-san, you
have fangs. And your eyes are yellow. Like hers.”

“Whaddya mean, Dekkun? I’m Ochako!”

“...and you’ve never called me ‘Dekkun’, before. Just… just ‘Deku’.” She shook her head.

“I’m not Himiko-chan, Dekk-Deku.” He waved his hands, halfway between the anxious mess he
was and the World’s Greatest Hero he is now.

“Can you get looked at by a medical professional? For me?” A wash of annoyance and glee and-

“Fine. I’ll go. I’ll see you later, Dek-Deku.”

“...please be okay, Uraraka-san. I… please be okay.” Her face softened.

“Of course, Izukun. I’m fine.” She patted his hand before she rose, heading out of the room.

She meant to go to the doctors, she really did, but she found herself walking into a unisex toilet,
before she absently locked the door.

…wait, why did she…?

 She faced the mirror, and half her face rippled, shifting, before it was half of her, and half of
Himiko-chan.

“...Himiko-chan? Am I…?”

Her right hand lifted up, before stroking her face, Himiko-chan’s pale skin without her beans. I’m
okay, Occhan. I told you I’d be like the people I love! Himiko’s half of her face contorts into a
giggle.

“...I thought you…”

I did too! I really meant it when I said that I loved you, and I wanted you to remember me, and I
wanted to use my quirk for good. Her face set into a frown.

“Himiko-chan, you shouldn’t have thrown your life away for me! I wanted to save you!”

You did, Occhan. Himiko-chan’s face settled into a gentle smile, and god it was so cute. You made
it worth it for me to live and die on my terms. And now I get to spend the rest of my life with you! A
sly look crosses her face, her blush deepening. And you thought I was cute~

Her face broke into a bright flush. “N-n-no ah didn’!”

Occhan, I’m your blood now. The part of you that will always love being you. I can tell when you
think I’m a cutie~

“Don’ put it like that~” Her hand moved to clap against her face, but her other hand stopped it
before it made contact. “Wait. You’re mah what?! What if yah wanted to live yer own life?”

Occhan. I can’t. Blood bubbles from her arm, before twining into ribbons of muscle and
capillaries, slowly forming into a little knot that transformed into Himiko-chan’s face, what she
looked like when her quirk first emerged. “I’m my quirk factor, now. I need someone’s blood to
live in and love on, until I die. I want to be Occhan’s blood, and live and die as Occhan.”

“...I’m sorry, Hi-” Her finger pressed against her lips, before shifting, stroking down her jawline
and pressing her thumb against her lips.

I get to be with you and love you and love being you. This is the best gift I’ve ever gotten. Never
apologize for loving me enough to let me be your blood~

“...okay.” She looked into the mirror, her brown eyes meeting Himiko-chan’s amber, the fangs, the
cat-eye slits, and the other elephant in the room is lingering. “...what about Izukun?”

What about him? Love him too. You have so much heart, Occhan, and I’d know. She sounds
irrepressibly smug. You have two hands. I just need to borrow one every once in a while. She grins,
fangs bright, and it’s still the cutest smile in the world. It’s only as complicated as you make it,
Occhan.

“...thanks, Himiko-chan. I’ll… go talk to him soon. Tell him about you.” The Himiko-tan head
bobs. “And you still have the cutest smile in the world.”

And now you do too.

End Notes
guess I lied; this is a series.

come yell at me at Green Tea Infusions an IzuOcha (and IzuOcha+) shipping server!

also, an obligatory 'fuck 395'

 I got fanart! by Kermit!

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