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Come Follow Me - Ch4
Come Follow Me - Ch4
Come Follow Me - Ch4
CONTENTS CHAPTER
1 Adolescence is a time of change,
challenge and growth
In Class Work
Working in small groups, brainstorm all of the changes that take place in
people’s lives as they grow from childhood to adolescence using the headings:
Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, Social, Spiritual.
Most adolescents find themselves questioning many of the things they took for granted
as children. They question attitudes and beliefs that they had accepted from various
sources – parents, the media, teachers and even their childhood friends. Sometimes
adolescents can become confused by some of the new experiences resulting from their
growth and development.
Just as the adolescent years are a time of preparation for adult responsibilities in other
areas of life such as study, employment and participation in wider community activities,
they are also a time of preparation for the role many will later have in life as married
people and parents.
God created the human body with the potential to express the goodness within the
person. This goodness can be expressed verbally, in spoken or written words, and
non-verbally, through facial expressions and other physical signs.
In Class Work
Person A mimes the expression on the first card, Person B imitates Person A’s
interpretation as though B is a mirror, then Person B identifies what description
they think is being expressed. Reverse roles so that Person B starts off with a
new expression.
Sexuality refers to how one perceives oneself and relates to others as male or female. It
is about how males relate with females and other males and how females relate with
males and other females.
Each person’s sexuality has an influence on them from their infancy to old age. It
influences what they think, feel and do, as well as their interests and how they relate.
A teenager’s sexuality, male or female, affects all aspects of his or her personal
development. This includes their intellectual, emotional, spiritual and physical
development.
Sexuality is a vital and dynamic part of every person’s identity. It is an integral part of
life that commences at birth and continues throughout a person’s life.
Everyone needs to learn to express their male or female sexuality in appropriate ways.
This is an important challenge that young people face since it is essential for positive,
life-affirming relationships with other people. In meeting this challenge during their
adolescent years and beyond, adolescents learn many of the essential things they will
need to bring to all their relationships as mature adults whether they remain single,
marry, become priests or consecrated religious. They will need to learn attitudes and
skills centred on putting others before themselves.
Gender identity
Gender, being male or female, is the foundation of sexuality. Gender identity refers to
whether a person sees themselves as male or female. Gender identity depends on more
than purely observable characteristics. It results from factors such as how people
perceive themselves and how they are treated and related to from birth.
A person’s gender affects how they relate with others. It affects how they see and feel
about things. It affects their interests, activities and attitudes. In order to develop as
fully integrated sexual beings, people need to relate with others both male and female,
since males and females complement each other. Generally speaking men and women
think, feel and see things differently, so they tend to relate differently, and reflect some
human qualities more strongly than others. Males and females enrich each other.
Familial love
Familial love is the love between family members. It
moves family members to be concerned and to care for each other.
Altruistic love
Altruistic love enables people to show genuine concern and care for others whether they
know them or not. People demonstrate this love when they:
• help others, expecting nothing in return
• try to help after an accident or tragedy
• donate money to needy causes
• join in community service programs.
Romantic love
Romantic love refers to the love flowing from psychological and physical attraction.
People often refer to this as being ‘in love’. It stirs strong feelings in people, which may
lead them to seek to satisfy them in a sexual way. People who are romantically in love
may:
• feel the need to be with those to whom they are attracted
• invest a great amount of time, effort and thought in that relationship.
• be led to physically express the depth of God’s love for one another in marriage.
When this love is based exclusively on self-gratification – that is, where satisfying one’s
own sexual desires is what matters to an individual – then it is not authentic ‘love’.
Just as it can take many years to become certain about ‘who we are’, it can take a long
time to develop a healthy sexuality.
Teenagers who feel confused about this, need to focus on the question: How can I
develop a healthy and mature sexuality? In addition to this, they need to ask themselves
questions such as:
• Do I worry too much about the expectations of others, especially peers?
• Do I compare myself too much to others?
• Where do my ideas about being male and female come from?
• Do I take too much notice of how others of my gender behave in TV shows or other
media?
• How much are my ideas on sexuality influenced by TV or sports personalities or
other public figures?
This is an important responsibility for every adolescent and there are no short cuts to
reaching the level of maturity and a healthy sexuality that will enable a person to find
the happiness and fulfilment that married love offers.
Adolescents need to be particularly wary of others who try to persuade them to engage
in sexual experimentation because the motives of such people will not be altruistic (ie.
focussed on doing what is in the best interests of the other person).
Some young people become more conscious of their sexuality at an earlier point of their
development than others. For many individuals, other areas of their lives develop first.
Variations in the areas and rates of development between people tend to even out over
time.
Adolescents can also find that their emotions seem to battle each other. For example,
they may feel that they hate someone they normally love. Powerful feelings can also
make it hard to resist doing what teenagers know to be wrong.
A challenge for adolescents is to learn to integrate their thoughts, emotions, values and
other personal gifts so that they function together in harmonious ways. The reality,
however, seems to be that, instead of functioning in harmony, they seem to work against
each other.
Adolescents need to remember, therefore, that no matter how strongly sexual feelings
affect them, such feelings remain only part of the whole person. They are not the whole
of one’s sexuality and they should not be allowed to take over or to dominate.
If one doesn’t learn to control these feelings, they can end up being expressed in ways that
are harmful to self and others, and are morally wrong such as treating persons as mere
objects to be ‘taken’ or ‘used’ for one’s pleasure and self-gratification.
The Intellect
Intellectual gifts can help people to develop a healthy sexuality. For example,
people learn to understand their sexual feelings, to evaluate them against ideals
and moral values and to work out right and wrong ways of behaving.
Intellectual gifts can help adolescents to come to know others as people and to
evaluate sexual stereotypes, social trends and influences.
The Emotions
As people learn to understand and express their emotions appropriately, they also
learn to do the same with their sexual feelings. The same skills and habits apply
to making choices in times of strong emotions as they do to making choices when
sexual feelings are strong.
The Spirit
As people develop spiritually, their inner spiritual strength grows. As it does so,
they can draw upon it to overcome any expressions of sexual feelings that are not
appropriate to particular situations. This helps them to achieve greater inner
freedom. For example, they can overcome desires to engage in sexual activities
that are appropriate only to the relationship between husband and wife.
The Will
As people use their wills to develop self-control, they grow in their ability to
make responsible choices, rather than be controlled by sexual feelings. At times,
despite their best efforts, individuals may not be able to express their sexual
feelings in ways that respect their sexuality or the sexuality of others. As they
learn self-mastery, they also learn to express their sexual feelings appropriately.
Relating skills
As people develop healthy relationships, they grow in the ability to exercise self-control
over sexual feelings that are relationally inappropriate. This is because the emphasis
shifts to realising the full potential of relationships based on a healthy sexuality.
Adolescents find that they are able to express their strong sexual feelings in
positive, life-giving ways for self and others as they overcome self-centred
attitudes and behaviours.
In Class Work
Use the information in Chapters 1 and 2 to help you to answer the following
questions:
2. Explain the meanings of familial love, altruistic love and romantic love.
For each type of love give two examples of positive ways that people can
express this form of love.
6. List the basic human gifts that people need to develop in order to support
a healthy sexuality.
... in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them.
(Genesis 1:27)
Each was created in God’s image and likeness and each was created to reflect God in
different ways.
Males have been created to reflect God in masculine ways and females have been created
to reflect God in feminine ways. Males do not reflect God better than females, nor do
females better reflect God than males.
Equal in dignity
Created in God’s image and likeness, male and female are also equal in dignity. Each
respects their own dignity and that of others when they treat each other with respect.
Neither should treat the other as less equal than themselves.
Yahweh God shaped the man from the soil of the ground and blew the breath of
life into his nostrils, and man became a living being. (Genesis 2:7)
The ‘man’ had the whole of creation to enjoy, yet ‘he’ still felt alone and incomplete and
needed another human being. God then created a woman from the rib of the man
(Genesis 2:22).
The first parents were created as male and female. Their sexuality was not merely an
addition but was an essential part of their nature.
In this way, the Yahwist Creation Story preserves God’s teaching that God created
human sexuality for the purpose of human beings relating with each other.
The closest of all chosen relationships is marriage. This love is so close that the husband
and wife feel unable to love any other person in the same way. It is a love that needs a
special expression, an expression described as the reason why,
The second Creation Story describes this love in an ancient Jewish way when the first
man and woman marry:
Now, both of them were naked, the man and his wife, but they felt no shame
before each other. (Genesis 2:25)
The purpose for which God created human beings capable of sexual intercourse,
therefore, is to express married love. Sexual intercourse is an expression of relationship
only in so far as it is a way of expressing married love.
From all that God revealed about human sexuality in the two creation stories, healthy
human sexuality can be said to have the characteristics outlined in the following table:
Basic characteristics revealed in the People develop a healthy sexuality when God
Creation Stories enables them to ...
1. God created males and females in think, speak and behave all their life in
God’s own image and likeness ways that reflect God’s selfless love and
goodness
2. God gave males and females equal show respect towards those of the
dignity opposite sex, and never exploit them
or treat them in disrespectful ways
3. God created males and females to fulfil their roles as men and women based
reflect God equally, but in different on their equality as males and females
ways
4. God charged the first human beings to have the sexual self-discipline needed to
develop the good in creation, including understand and direct sexual feelings and
themselves curiosity, so that they do not behave in
ways that disobey God’s laws
5. Love means being committed to the allow their sexual feelings and curiosity to
good of others assist them to do only what is good for
others
7. God created males and females capable reflect God as Creator of life, by
of sexual intercourse so that they could conceiving and bearing children and to
express the special relationship of remain faithful to their marriage vows
marriage
In Class Work
3. Identify examples of young people in the media who you think might serve
as role models for teenagers who are striving to develop a healthy sexuality.
4. Explain what it is about these young people and how they live that
demonstrates that they are striving to develop a healthy sexuality.
The author of the story of the Fall recorded this story to illustrate that, to the extent
that human beings fail to relate with God, they will find it difficult to develop a healthy
sexuality.
To the extent that they do not relate with God, people find it challenging at times not to
give into their sexual feelings. This results in:
• sexual temptations that are difficult to resist
• strong desires to engage in sexual activities outside marriage
• desires to see or imagine others as objects for sexual self-gratification.
In Class Work
List names of magazines and television programs that are commonly read and
viewed by teenagers.
Many teenagers and young adults today become sexually involved because they are
physically attracted to each other. They ‘feel’ very close, and are hurt when those with
whom they had sexual experiences want to end the relationship. This type of ‘love’ can
be very misleading. People can feel close, when in fact there is no mutual loyalty or
commitment to the other.
‘Romantic love’ is a wonderful experience based, as it is, upon strong emotional feelings
towards another person. As teenagers develop in their sexuality, the attraction of
romantic love will feature more strongly in their experience. However, while
relationships may begin romantically, they need to mature to genuine love if they are to
be lasting. Couples who confuse romantic feelings with commitment can be deeply hurt
when their relationship breaks up.
In Class Work
Ideas that differ from what God has revealed cannot lead to the development of a
healthy and mature sexuality.
The ways people experience the first stirrings of sexual interest vary from person to
person. It is important, therefore, to remain true to oneself, and not to worry if one
does not fit current stereotypes.
Teenagers can feel pressured into pretending that they are more interested in sexual
matters than in fact they are in reality. For example, many are interested in relating with
the opposite sex as people, rather than just focusing on them simply as sexual objects.
They may feel pressured to engage in friendships for which they are not yet ready. They
may even make up stories about sexual exploits just to impress their friends.
What did this tell you about the friendship? The friend?
Yourself?
In Class Work
Use the information in Chapters 3 and 4 to help you to answer the following
questions:
2. The Yahwist Creation Story teaches that God created human sexuality for
the purpose of ________________ with each other in a way that reflected
God’s relationship with them – one of __________ and _______________.
In the story God shaped ‘man’ from the _____________. ‘Man’ received life
when God ___________________________________________. The ‘man’ felt
alone so God created ______________________ from _________________.
5. Give some examples of ways in which human beings have suffered because
they have at times been unable to express their sexuality in the healthy ways
that God intended.
The human ability to love as God loves was damaged by original sin, as was people’s
ability to develop a healthy sexuality. To develop a healthy sexuality, the first thing
people need to do is to again draw close to God.
God the Father sent his son Jesus and the Holy Spirit to the human race in order to give
God’s guidance and strength to people as they struggle to develop their human sexuality
in healthy ways.
In Class Work
Why do people need God’s guidance and strength to develop their sexuality in
healthy ways? Why can’t they just do this on their own? Discuss in groups
and/or as a class.
‘The time is fulfilled, and the Kingdom of God is close at hand. Repent, and
believe the gospel.’ (Mark 1:15)
The Kingdom of God exists where the divine power of love and goodness is accepted. It
is a share in the power of God’s own love.
The divine power to love as God does has a special name – charity. Charity helps people
to relate with God as originally intended in creation. The closer a person draws to God,
the more they are empowered by God to love others as originally intended. Charity,
then, is the power God gives people to:
• love God for God’s own sake
• love others for God’s sake.
• live God’s commandments
• love self and others as God does.
Many people today think of ‘charity’ in terms of giving money and possessions to the
poor. While it does include giving to those in need, charity is much more than this. It is
the share in God’s power to love, a gift received through Baptism.
In Class Work
Construct a mind map with the word ‘charity’ at the centre and the four aspects
of charity, given in the dot points, as offshoots. From these offshoots, map
practical ways in which people your age can demonstrate each of these
aspects of charity.
‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all
your strength and with all your mind…’ (Luke 10:27)
Jesus described these as the two greatest commandments. The order in which they are
presented is very important.
In Class Work
In pairs, create a flyer or brochure that seeks to explain the two great
commandments of Jesus.
He demonstrated that charity requires love for everyone. Perhaps the most dramatic
demonstration of this was his forgiveness of those who crucified him.
When they reached the place called The Skull, there they crucified him and the two
criminals, one on his right, the other on his left. Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them;
they do not know what they are doing.’ (Luke 23:33–34)
As well as loving everyone he met, Jesus taught his followers that they must do the
same. He said:
Jesus showed in ways that were revolutionary for his time that respect for women
required seeing them as equals. For example, unlike other rabbis at the time, who only
taught men, Jesus included women among his disciples (Luke 8:1–3). In those times,
only men were regarded as reliable witnesses. In revealing his Resurrection to women
first (Mark 16:1–8), Jesus rejected the social attitude of his time.
The basic lesson Jesus taught in his life and ministry was that people must always respect
each other as persons of equal dignity.
The Gospels reveal that, in openly relating with women, Jesus deviated sharply from the
conventions of his society. It was behaviour that took even his disciples by surprise:
‘…his disciples returned and were surprised to find him speaking to a woman …’
(John 4:27)
In Class Work
Read the story of Jesus revealing his Resurrection to the women in Mark 16:1–8.
Imagine what the women would have felt after finding the tomb empty and
encountering the ‘young man in a white robe.’ Using the perspective of one of
the women, write about the event, describing your feelings.
How would you explain to Peter and the disciples what you had witnessed?
How do you think they would react to your news?
His task was to teach about the Kingdom of God and to invite all to accept God’s power
of love and goodness.
The special love Jesus demonstrated is called celibate love, or simply ‘celibacy’. Jesus
taught that all his followers are called to this kind of love at sometime during their lives.
Teenagers and all other people who are not married are called to live celibate single lives.
Religious brothers, sisters and priests are called in a special way to celibate love, and like
Jesus they are called to celibacy for their whole lives. Part of their calling to celibacy is
the desire to dedicate their whole lives to serving God by loving as Jesus loves. They are
called to remain unmarried for the rest of their lives, as was Jesus, ‘for the sake of the
kingdom of Heaven’ (Matthew 19:12).
Priests and religious brothers and sisters make a conscious choice for a life of celibacy as
a special way of loving and accept this as a requirement of the Church and as a gift from
God.
Heaven is where people will experience, with all the angels and saints, the perfect
fullness of God’s love. It will be a love that far surpasses even the married love people
experience in their earthly lives.
The second requirement for developing chastity is self-mastery. This means working to
understand sexual feelings and desires and to discipline them like any other emotion, so
that they do not become too powerful to resist.
Many people try to live the virtue of chastity by self-discipline alone. They find that it is
not possible without God’s help. They can find themselves failing at times to resist
sexual temptations.
Modesty is natural within people. It is a spiritual quality. While its demands vary from
society to society, it means avoiding sexually explicit and pornographic materials.
Modesty also means that people will dress in ways that do not provoke others to see
them as ‘sex objects’.
In Class Work
Use the information in Chapter 5 to help you to answer the following questions:
God had two purposes in creating sexual organs; these were that married couples could:
• express their married love to each other
• conceive children.
Through sexual intercourse, each was to express in marriage the kind of love that
reflected God’s faithfulness and total generosity. Together, they were also able to reflect
God, the giver of life, by conceiving children.
Sexual intercourse was created by God, therefore, to be both love-giving and life-giving.
1. Human beings have free will. They can choose when to express married love
and to have children. Other creatures engage sexually by instinct and urges.
Human beings can choose not to follow sexual urges.
2. Husband and wife reflect the love of God for each other when they express
married love in sexual ways. Other creatures cannot do this because they were
not created in God’s own image and likeness.
3. God created human beings sacred as in the image and likeness of God. Unlike
animal or insect life, new human life is sacred from the moment of conception.
United by the Holy Spirit The Holy Spirit will draw act on the desire to belong
with other baptized baptized Christians closer to a faith community with
believers together. others who seek to live as
God calls
It is important to understand that people who draw on the graces of Baptism are
enabled to:
• turn to God by praying for help to resist sexual temptations
• exercise self-control when they experience powerful sexual feelings and desires
• develop the virtue of chastity as they draw closer to Jesus.
Confirmation
Through Confirmation, the gifts of baptised people are strengthened as they receive the
special strength of the Holy Spirit. These include those gifts which relate to their sexuality.
Gifts of Confirmation
Gift: Experiences
The Spirit of Wisdom Growing ability to see the wholeness of
Ability to see the good in everything as persons rather than viewing them solely
God does, and as Jesus did in sexual ways.
The Spirit of Right Judgement Making decisions that respect the need to
Ability to judge the true value of strive for a healthy sexuality
everything, as did Jesus
Valuing a healthy sexuality
For those who seek it, the special strength of the Holy Spirit strengthens them against
sexual feelings and desires that otherwise would lead them to behave in ways God does
not want. This strengthens charity.
As Christians develop and use the gifts of the Spirit, the fruits of the Holy Spirit grow
further in them. The fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, trustfulness, gentleness and self-control.
Eucharist
The graces of the Eucharist help a person to develop a healthy sexuality in three key
ways:
1. Union with Christ strengthens against sexual temptations by drawing anyone who
receives Holy Communion regularly, closer to Jesus.
2. The Eucharist nourishes all spiritual gifts, including those of Baptism and
Confirmation. Without this nourishment, the gifts received through Baptism and
Confirmation will not develop as intended by God.
3. The Eucharist deepens union with Christ and strengthens charity; it wipes away past
venial sin and strengthens against temptations to break serious laws of God and
commit a mortal sin.
Penance
Many Australians today do not understand the gift of chastity. Nor do they realise that
one must have a relationship with God in order to receive the power of God’s love upon
which chastity is based.
Many today say chastity is ‘old-fashioned’ because they find it hard to live chaste lives.
Perhaps they try but lack the strength God’s love brings because they:
• do not worship or pray to God
• do not try to keep God’s commandments.
This does not mean that Christians always behave in chaste ways. They are tempted and
at times will fail to keep God’s commandments.
Jesus understood that this would be the case. It is one reason why he instituted the
Sacrament of Penance. Through this sacrament:
• the relationship with God of those who have sinned is healed
• the divine power upon which chastity is based grows stronger.
In Class Work
What are the ‘forces’ or factors at work in society today that make it hard for
people, including Christians, to live chaste lives?
In Class Work
Use the information in Chapter 6 to help you to answer the following questions
a) ______________________________________________
b) ______________________________________________
c) ______________________________________________
3. The strength of the Holy Spirit can enable people to cope with sexual
feelings and desires that can lead them to behave in ways that God does not
intend. Complete the table below to show how the seven gifts of the Holy
Spirit received at Confirmation can assist people in this aspect of their lives.
Gifts of Confirmation
Gift: Experiences
The Spirit of Wisdom Growing ability to see the
Ability to see __________________ ___________ of persons rather
______________________________ than viewing them solely in
______________________________ sexual ways.
Valuing a _____________________
_____________________________
In Class Work
4. List ways the sacraments of (a) Eucharist and (b) Penance empower
people to live chaste lives.
Homosexual orientation
As they develop, some people feel that they are orientated sexually towards others of the
same gender. This is referred to as a homosexual orientation.
Homosexual orientation refers only to sexual feelings and desires. It does not refer to
any other aspects of a person.
Many teenagers and young adults can experience homosexual feelings. These are feelings
of sexual attraction to persons of the same gender. To have such feelings in adolescence
does not mean that a person will have a homosexual orientation. To engage in sexual
activity including homosexual actions in the developing teenage years can damage the
development of a healthy sexuality.
God forbids sexual acts between males or females with others of the same gender
because this activity is not consistent with the biblical meaning of human sexuality. Bible
teaching and hence Church teaching is that sexual activity is to be between a man and a
woman, that it be an expression of love, in a lasting relationship of marriage open to the
procreation of children. (Genesis 19; 1 Corinthians 6:9–10; 1 Timothy 1:9–10;
Romans 1: 18, 22–28 and Jude 1:7).
Many people live God’s laws related to human sexuality. These laws are as achievable
for homosexual people as for others. Homosexual persons, like those who are not
married are therefore called to be celibate and chaste. The means for being freed from
inappropriate sexual desires and impulses are as available to homosexual people as they
are to heterosexual people.
God’s laws relate to homosexual actions. In no way does God condemn people for
having a homosexual orientation. On the contrary, those who for whatever reason, have
a homosexual orientation are loved by God as is every other human person.
Many today ridicule and even commit acts of violence against homosexual people. Any
form of persecution or ridicule of homosexual people violates their God-given dignity. It
is important to keep in mind always that those who have this orientation:
... do not choose their homosexual condition; for most of them it is a trial. They
must be accepted with respect, compassion and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust
discrimination in their regard should be avoided. (Catechism 2358)
In Class Work
How widely held in Australian society is the idea that the ‘whole person’ must
be respected?
What TV shows or films present situations that show respect for the ‘whole
person’? List and describe some TV shows or films that show an absence of
respect for the ‘whole person’.
What can failure to respect the ‘whole person’ lead to in relationships and in the
ways people are treated at work, school, among peers, etc?
Many people, however, deliberately stir their sexual thoughts and feelings by violating
sexual modesty. Ways they do so include:
• reading and viewing sexually explicit photographs, magazines and books
• selecting movies and TV programmes to see their sexual scenes
• imagining others, to whom they are attracted, in sexual situations
• listening to songs which have sexually explicit lyrics.
To continue sexual fantasies deliberately is called lust. The difference between natural
sexual thoughts and lust is the deliberate intent involved in lust. Lust fails to respect the
sexuality of others. It fails to give them the dignity and equality expected by God. Jesus
warned that lust breaks the sixth commandment. It fails to respect the sexuality of self
and others. Jesus gave one example:
‘…I say this to you, if a man looks at a woman lustfully, he has already
committed adultery with her in his heart.’ (Matthew 5:27–28)
Pre-marital sex, or fornication, was forbidden by God. Jesus described pre-marital sex as
an ‘evil’ that comes ‘from the heart’ (Mark 7:21). To those of his time, ‘evil’ meant
something that:
• broke a person’s relationship with God
• directly frustrated some good intended by God.
Premarital sex fails to respect the gifts of sexuality God has given on trust. It can be the
result of failing to relate with others as male or female persons.
When people disobey laws about healthy sexuality, they may stop going to Mass and
praying because of guilt. Yet God is always with people in their struggles with their
sexuality.
God created male and female capable of sexual intercourse so that they could express
married love in a special way. God means this act to make possible the conception of
children.
Unmarried couples do not have the kind of relationship needed to provide all that a
child needs to develop into a mature adult. Often premarital sexual relationships result
in unhappy experiences for the couple and children if they are conceived. These are
consequences that God never intended.
People who reject Jesus’ teaching about their sexuality may find it harder to live other
teachings of God.
Victims of sex abuse are often reluctant to seek help because of their feelings of
guilt. This is part of the damage abuse causes. These feelings can be misleading. In
the case of sexual abuse young people who are abused should always seek help
from someone they can trust.
2. What are the most positive messages you can take from
what you have learned?
God’s laws are meant to protect people from different forms of harm. The sixth and
ninth commandments are meant to protect them from harming their sexuality.
God revealed that marriage should be a special love relationship between a man and a
woman. This revelation about marriage is recorded in the Yahwist Creation story found
in the Bible:
... a man leaves his father and mother and becomes attached to his wife, and they
become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24)
The second purpose for which God created marriage is revealed with the First Creation
Story in the Bible, the Priestly account:
… in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them. God
blessed them, saying to them, ‘Be fruitful, multiply…’ (Genesis 1:27–28)
In this text, ‘in the image of God…male and female he created them’ means that males
and females should behave like God in masculine and feminine ways. The other purpose
of marriage is to ‘procreate’ children. The word, ‘procreate’, means to cooperate with
God in the conception and development of children until they reach adulthood.
God creates the soul of each child personally. It is from the soul, which is not inherited,
but directly created by God, that children receive their individuality.
Commitment in marriage
Jesus confirmed for his followers God’s intention regarding marriage. This made it possible
for them to draw upon the power of God in ways relevant to the needs of married life.
Some Pharisees approached him, and to put him to the test they said, ‘Is it against
the Law for a man to divorce his wife on any pretext whatever?’ He answered, ‘Have
you not read that the Creator from the beginning made them male and female, and
that he said: This is why a man leaves his father and mother and become attached to
his wife, and the two become one flesh? They are no longer two, therefore, but one
flesh. So then, what God has united, human beings must not divide.
They said to him, ‘Then why did Moses command that a writ of dismissal should be
given in cases of divorce?’ He said to them, ‘It was because you were so hardhearted,
that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but it was not like this from the
beginning. Now I say this to you: anyone who divorces his wife – I am not speaking
of an illicit marriage – and marries another, is guilty of adultery.’ (Matthew 19:3–9)
In Class Work
Jesus is with them to strengthen Husband and wife can draw on Jesus’ power
them to: to help them face and overcome daily difficulties
of married life
• take up their crosses
As with the gifts of every sacrament, those received through Marriage need to be
developed. They need to be strengthened if married couples are to draw upon these
gifts. To do so, they need:
• to pray daily. This prayer needs to include asking God for help with any issue or
problem affecting their marriage
• to receive Jesus in Holy Communion. Without the Eucharist, the spiritual gifts of
marriage lack the spiritual nourishment they need to grow stronger
• after sin, to be reconciled by Jesus with God through the Sacrament of
Reconciliation. Otherwise the closeness with God needed to strengthen their married
love and the gifts of the Sacrament of Marriage will be lacking
• to strive sincerely to live the commandments related to marriage.
In Class Work
God forbids actions which frustrate these purposes. Such actions weaken marriage
relationships. They also weaken the sexuality of people. This can affect their
ability to remain faithful in marriage.
Adultery
Adultery is sexual intercourse between a man and a woman, one or both of whom
is married to someone else. Jesus identified adultery as an‘evil’ that comes from
the heart - just like pre-marital sex (Mark 7:22).
Through the power of God, Jesus supports and consoles separated marriage
partners. He strengthens them to move on with their lives by supporting them
with his grace to live a chaste single life.
Trial-marriage
A trial-marriage is where a couple, who intend to marry to live together as
husband and wife before marrying. Again, sexual intercourse between any couple
who have not married is the same as pre-marital sex. It is forbidden by God and
identified by Jesus as ‘evil’ (Mark 7:21).
Marriage annulment
People can go through a marriage ceremony in good faith, unaware that one or
more conditions for a valid marriage is not present. There are many reasons why
this can happen, even though the couple are sincere and in good faith at the time
of the marriage.
The actual reasons why a marriage might not be valid are very complex. Where
one or both people in a divorced couple fail to fulfil the conditions for a valid
marriage, they receive an annulment. This is a legal document stating that no
marriage in fact took place, leaving each person free to marry again.
ADULTERY
apply for annulments to this Tribunal.
TRIAL-MARRIAGE
MARRIAGE ANNULMENT
INCEST
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Return to Return to
CONTENTS CHAPTER
8. GOD’S PLAN FOR MARRIED LOVE
In Class Work
Use the information from Chapters 7 and 8 to help find the best answer for
each of the following.
In order to write the article research and address the Catholic understanding
of marriage; the beauty and importance of Christian marriage in Australian
society and how Christian marriage goes against Australian social trends.