What Naranjo says in 27 Being and other books for the subtypes

-not the full complete description-

Claudio Naranjo
27 Being BOOK
Development and transformation is taken out, leaving how they are before transformation

sp1 sp2 sp3 sp4 sp5 sp6 sp7 sp8 sp9

so1 so2 so3 so4 so5 so6 so7 so8 so9

sx1 sx2 sx3 sx4 sx5 sx6 sx7 sx8 sx9

E1- Social
Existential decisions
Inadaptability is organized around decisions like: if things go like this and I don't like them, I'll
do them my way. Even when I need help, it's best not to lean on others; surely I will not receive
what I need and in the end I will have to fend for myself. I have to strive and strive to achieve it.
I will be strong, so I can face life and overcome my limits and my inability. Neither fever nor
disease will stop me, I will always be standing. I will not disturb them, and so they will love me.
I will strive to deserve it, so they will recognize me and I will be able to have the right to live in
this world...

P. literally states: “I take care of myself and I don't let myself be taken care of. I take care of
everything that concerns me, especially the difficult things. Since I need it but it is difficult to be
satisfied, I will fend for myself. I will be strong, good, bright, perfect. I will be like my father
and the opposite of my mother.” For others, the paternal and maternal roles are reversed, but the
final decisions substantially do not change.

Perfectionism
Inadaptability foresees a constant effort and commitment to do things well; this becomes an
unrealizable pretension: to be perfect. So, you need to do things better and better and you are
never satisfied with what you get. This attitude produces a state of constant tension that prevents
you from relaxing and enjoying the results. It quickly departs for another adventure or another
obligation to fulfill. Whoever walks this path is supported by a crazy and irrational idea: “Only if
I am perfect will I be loved,” says B. The challenge with yourself is that “you have to arrive
trusting only in your own ability and so others will admire me”.

Demand
The claim to be perfect needs an executive instrument. How do I get perfection? Demanding,
demanding. Even torture. With sacrifice and using only my means. The goal is to improve,
improve and improve. I will show those parents, sometimes both, sometimes above all the father,
but also the mother, what I am capable of. It is a kind of rescue that the child wants, and today
the adult: prisoner of his own history, unconsciously pursues an impossible end of perfection.
Develop a special eye to discover the error, the stain. Commitment and demand have the
objective of giving a good image of oneself.

The defensive system

The social E1, like the other subtypes, takes as a basis of its defensive systems above all the
reactive formation. Suppressing experiences is not enough. It transforms them. He wants to
improve. He believes that what he thinks or feels does not have enough value, or that it will not
be well received, and then transforms it into something else. The social subtype, in particular,
expresses little of its anger — unless it has sexual as its second subtype — and replaces it with
more socially acceptable forms. Their attitudes and expressions tend towards seriousness and
circumspection. It shows controlled coldness, a subtle smile and a certain kind of gentleness,
until it reaches an aristocratic superiority that can lead to indignation. It tends to show calm and
control. In the activities that produce the greatest tension, anger becomes a diffuse demand that
leads to the obsessive desire to improve and correct, especially the other, but also himself. Anger
hides, remains in the background and becomes a push to improve, a pretension and control of
oneself and others. Thus, the goal becomes seen as nobler: to do things better, to be better. For
P., the result of all this is disastrous. Not being programmed to have children, she manages to
have one through artificial insemination. He is mother and father at the same time. It does not
recognize the effective father's sufficient capacity. He tries very hard; he wants to offer the child
as much as possible. "I raised him as I was raised." The father wanted her to be perfect; she
wants her son to be perfect. "You don't cry, you don't laugh, you don't feel afraid." The result is
that the child self-produces small cuts and suffers; it does not tolerate all this presence and
perfection.

Other characteristics
The social subtype is the most intellectual of the three subtypes of E1 and is often a great
reasoner. Claudio Naranjo affirms: “Hides rage with imperturbability”. And then he adds:
“Aristocratic, elegant, circumspect. Underneath is the fire.”

Several of the people involved in this research are dedicated to volunteering and helping. B. is
dedicated to the defense of workers, although with an administrative role. He works in a union he
considers “moderate.” Everyone wants to be recognized for their own value, which is lost as
soon as a criticism arrives or they realize that they have been wrong. There is a tendency to have
the norm in mind: “the true norm is the one I believe in.”
The character one social is very different from the other subtypes of E1. This is the result of a
characteristic designated by Oscar Ichazo — from whom I learned — as inadaptability. For a
long time I preferred to simply use the word rigidity in describing this character, referring to
something akin to a kind of schoolteacher mentality, and also to what Wilhelm Reich saw when
he spoke of an "aristocratic character"; it's just that the word rigidity describes a behavioral style
or a specific personality trait rather than a need or passion. Therefore, it remained pending for me

to formulate a neurotic need from which the rigid character would become understandable.
In this search, the case of a woman who, in addition to being an intellectual and cultured
woman who was part of the philosophy department of a university, spoke with a marked
The American Midwest accent was very illuminating. And it was striking that she, despite
having moved to California a long time ago, she continued with this strong accent that is usually
associated with people with little educational level. Being a social character, it could be said that
her inadaptability was expressed in it; but how to understand such a behavioral trait from an
underlying motivation?

In this case, since people tend to adapt their way of speaking to that of the environment, it
was worth asking: why did she care so little about it? It was enough for him to ask me that it
became clear to me that the answer lay in his general attitude of feeling right. He acted as if the
thought ―my form is correct‖ implied that it is up to others to adapt. And this was also
noticeable in the fact that he made language errors that did not correspond to his cultural level,
which could be easily understood as a result of that attitude of believing himself to be someone
exemplary.

However, the feeling that I am right does not constitute a motivation, or a passion. And if
we want to explain the contrast between a conservational one - who, as we shall see, is the
perfectionist proper, in view of his chronic awareness of his imperfections, which leads him to
perfect himself -, and the social one - who already feels perfect and therefore can make serious
mistakes—, we must go back to the need for superiority, by virtue of which the social adopts the
position of impeccable and perfect. The social one has a real passion for feeling ―I'm right, and
you're wrong‖; and this, in turn, implies a certain power over others, because when he can make
others feel that they are wrong. It is as if he were saying, ―If you are wrong, then I have more
right than you to dominate the situation.‖

It is a great technique, that of dominating through making others feel that they are wrong,
and it can be understood as an alternative to the dominance that the sexual one establishes
through mere assertiveness in taking possession and feeling with it. corresponding right. But,
since these characters feel above all an implicit moral superiority, it is useful to point out the
great difference between morality and moralism: what is immoral in E1, apparently so upright
and honorable, lies precisely in that its apparent morality is nothing more than moralism.
Inadaptability foresees a constant effort and commitment to do things well; this becomes an
unrealizable pretension: to be perfect. So, you need to do things better and better and you are
never satisfied with what you get. This attitude produces a state of constant tension that prevents
you from relaxing and enjoying the results. It quickly departs for another adventure, another
obligation to fulfill. Whoever walks this path is supported by a crazy and irrational idea: ―Only
if I am perfect will I be loved,‖ says B. The challenge with yourself is that ―you have to arrive
trusting only in your own ability and so others will admire me‖.

The claim to be perfect needs an executive instrument. How do I get perfection? Demanding,
demanding. Even torture. With sacrifice and using only my means. The goal is to improve,
improve and improve. I will show those parents, sometimes both, sometimes above all the father,
but also the mother, what I am capable of. It is a kind of rescue that the child wants, and today
the adult: prisoner of his own history, unconsciously pursues an impossible end of perfection.
Develop a special eye to discover the error, the stain. Commitment and demand have the
objective of giving a good image of oneself.

The social E1, like the other subtypes, takes as a basis of its defensive systems above all the
reactive formation. Suppressing experiences is not enough. It transforms them. He wants to
improve. He believes that what he thinks or feels does not have enough value, or that it will not
be well received, and then transform it into something else. The social subtype, in particular,
expresses little of its anger — unless it has sexual as its second subtype — and replaces it with
more socially acceptable forms. Their attitudes and expressions tend towards seriousness and
circumspection. It shows controlled coldness, a subtle smile and a certain kind of gentleness,
until it reaches an aristocratic superiority that can lead to indignation. It tends to show calm and
control. In the activities that produce the greatest tension, anger becomes a diffuse demand that
leads to the obsessive desire to improve and correct, especially the other, but also himself.

Anger hides, remains in the background and becomes a push to improve, a pretension and
control of oneself and others. Thus, the goal becomes seen as nobler: to do things better, to be
better. For P., the result of all this is disastrous. Not being programmed to have children, she
manages to have one through artificial insemination. He is mother and father at the same time. It
does not recognize the effective father's sufficient capacity. He tries very hard; he wants to offer
the child as much as possible. "I raised him as I was raised." The father wanted her to be perfect;
she wants her son to be perfect. "You don't cry, you don't laugh, you don't feel afraid." The result
is that the child self-produces small cuts and suffers; it does not tolerate all this presence and
perfection.

The social subtype is the most intellectual of the three subtypes of E1 and is often a great
reasoner. Claudio Naranjo affirms: ―Hides rage with imperturbability‖. And then he adds:
―Aristocratic, elegant, circumspect. Underneath is the fire.‖
Several of the people involved in this research are dedicated to volunteering and helping.
B. is dedicated to the defense of workers, although with an administrative role. He works in a
union he considers ―moderate.‖ Everyone wants to be recognized for their own value, which is
lost as soon as a criticism arrives or they realize that they have been wrong. There is a tendency
to have the norm in mind: ―the true norm is the one I believe in.‖

It is easy to imagine that the child, faced with these difficulties that are constantly breathing, has
decided not to create further problems and to withdraw, limiting their demands and minimizing
their needs and desires. "I don't want to bother" would seem to be the basic decision; and from
this, he learned not to ask and not to support himself. He numbed his natural vivacity and
transformed into a quiet child—too much— a good child. He doesn't ask, but he also doesn't
agree to receive, timidly saying no, even when it's a small gift. He was embarrassed when they
worried or paid too much attention to him, according to him. He was considered a fragile, weak
child: ―Don't get tired... don't run.. . Are you tired?‖ they would say. I didn't like it.

● - emotional, who retained emotions by repressing them; I didn't want to show them, but
inside they devastated my chest

I learned to control myself, I became stronger, harder; I didn't want them to find out what
actually lived. I didn't want to be ―weak, fragile, sensitive‖ and therefore hid my moods, the
difficulties, and didn't ask. The way they loved me made me feel different, incapable, limited.

E1 - Sexual
Oscar Ichazo used the Spanish noun cello (zeal) in reference to the characteristic passion of the
sexual, and this is a word that has a double meaning. When speaking of an animal in heat (that is,
in the estrus phase), the word denotes great sexual excitement; In reference to personality, when
we talk about doing things with zeal, we mean something similar to care, care, dedication or
fervor. Thus, it is understood that heat, in its broadest sense, is something analogous to the
intensity with which the animal in heat seeks the object of its instinct.

We would say that a sexual E1 is characterized by a special intensity of their desires that
makes them urgent, vehement. If we want to understand why anger in the sexual sphere results in
this jealousy, we can say that anger potentiates desire by lending it its aggressiveness. In other
words, anger gives any desire a special strength and intensity, so that the person feels not only
strongly drawn toward its satisfaction, but feels entitled to it.

The result is a type that is characterized by a strong spirit of domination and conquest. I will
explain it with a collective behavior: when the emerald or diamond mines in South Africa were
only exploited by Europeans, many objected that this was not fair, since such wealth belonged to
Africans. However, many people—completely convinced—replied: ―what good is it? What are
you going to do for them? They have no culture!‖ And it seemed obvious to them that it was the
Europeans to whom the diamonds belonged in view of their civilized character—which
contrasted with the supposedly barbaric character of the primitives.

The same thing happened with the Spanish conquerors, who in the name of their very Christian
emperor felt authorized to take the gold from the Aztecs or the Incas. Similarly, some people feel
more entitled than their neighbors to the good things in life, to the satisfaction of their desires or
even to exploitative behavior. And in this there is not only vehemence of desires, but an illusory
and exculpatory conviction that this satisfaction justifies aggressive acts.

A young man in one of my groups explained that when he was about six years old, he liked to
put his penis between his sister's buttocks. His mother told him: ―No! Don't do that!‖ And he
answered: ―Why not?‖

Never before have I heard such an anecdote from a little boy: ―Why not?‖ Because we live in a
sufficiently repressive culture so that it is usual that, when children are reprimanded by their
parents for sexual activities, they experience it as a shame, and sometimes even with a guilt that
leaves traumatic traces. For a sexual one, however, the strength of the drive is sufficient for the
person—as in the case of the lustful enneatype—to be more willing to question the censure of
authority than the strength of her desire.

The lack of serenity has to do with that fiery impulse, with feeling that I was angry, that I
did not control it, and with realizing how I could move from one extreme to the other in a short
time. That, in addition, baffled and disoriented the people around me, and I felt how it hurt them,
which made me suffer too. The only luck is that it did not last too long in time.

My way of thinking was to want to do my best, demanding myself and demanding. When this
was not the case, the ease of criticism or angry outburst was the order of the day. I thought that
the injustices in the world could be solved if we all did a little bit of our part. Therefore, when I
encountered a flagrant injustice, I automatically jumped out aggressively and faced this situation
without contemplation. I had a fantasy that I could improve the world, and maybe something I
could do, but not in that aggressive way. Approaching it from a more loving and compassionate
attitude, at the same time as firm, is giving me better results without people feeling attacked.
Although that does not mean that on some occasions he has not consciously put that
aggressiveness at stake.

E1 - Self-Preservation
Ichazo called anguish to the passion characteristic of the one conservation. However, he
preferred to use the word worry. It could be said, in fact, that in this type of person concern is a
real passion. And it's not just behavior that can be described as worrying too much — or even
feeling a need to worry — but they worry about things that are okay, and sometimes spoil what
they touch by trying to fix what doesn't need fixing. This need to worry can be understood as an
exaggerated need for foresight and to have everything under control, in turn motivated by a fear
that its survival or conservation will be threatened.

In reality, the image he has of himself is that of being too imperfect and that is why his
activity becomes a constant and obsessive improvement of himself. His anger, on the other hand,
hides behind a friendly benevolence and an attitude of service that does not allow his anger and
resentment to show through. That is, it transforms his anger into goodwill.

“It is not difficult to conceive that questioning can be more creative than sticking to answers
made in advance. The iconoclastic posture rejects symbols and seeks the source of meaning
beyond form. If a moderate iconoclastic posture can be healthy even in the face of valid
solutions,
how much more so in the face of pseudo-solutions to which we cling in order to continue
sleeping
peacefully? After all, all the values we originally loved emerge from doubt, searching, and even
despair. The water that quenched the thirst of our ancestors may not be the water we need today,
it must be found again every time and it cannot be stored.”
Claudio Naranjo, “La única búsqueda”, page 13

Perfection, constituting a mechanical search, is a trap that prevents achieving just what is sought.
The anger of E1 conservation, being so controlled and repressed, often goes unnoticed. Reaction
control favors this lack of self-awareness. The fundamental question points to how to stop being
trapped in the circle and in the egoic script, in other words, how to wake up and how not to
―continue to sleep peacefully‖.

The E1 conservation believes it is in the right process of transformation. Their eagerness

to improve and their effort to improve themselves seem to contain strong doses of awareness.
More so. His choice for the fulfillment of duty to the detriment of pleasure makes him believe
that he is on the right path. His awareness of the ideal, the sacrifice to achieve it, the internal
judge who continually dictates the good and the bad, the sense of guilt that accompanies him,
make us think that he has everything in his favor. This is the trap that obnubilates consciousness
and prevents it from realizing things.

Perfectionism and anger linked to it are mechanical responses, pre-established scripts. There is
no freedom but inflexibility. There is no love but correction. There is no consciousness but
control. There is no essence but ego. How can he have spent all his energies in favor of the
wrong cause? If perfection is not worthy of seeking itself, there is no salvation possible. If worry
and anguish, which have been the thermometers that have marked the temperature of
commitment to personal improvement, do not work, what other alternative fits. Oviparous
animals need to break the eggshell to live their life and fully develop.

The shell of the ego, the egoic circle, like the circle of the Yezids of Gurdjief, has to be broken.
Therefore, the first step of transformation involves awakening, becoming aware of egoic
mechanisms, unleashing the tows that keep the person trapped in his existential script. But how
Does this change, this awareness, this awakening occur?

E2 - Social
Cold
Within E2, who is the most emotional type, this is the least so among the three subtypes. If the
defense mechanism of the E2 is repression, which turns unconscious the thoughts, cravings, and
necessities regarded as unacceptable, in the social E2 this strategy leads to an almost complete
cooling of emotions. There are times in which, faced with a significantly painful happening, he
“freezes” and loses contact with part of his emotional world.

The social E2 can therefore remain impossible with nothing and no one able to question his
aggrandizement. If anyone saw that he cannot do something, that he doesn't know or isn't
worthwhile, it would be catastrophic because a self-referential must not ever allow himself to
fail. At the same time, this coldness and hardness protects him and helps him cover his terror of
being once again betrayed and that no one catches him in a fail. “To protect himself, he
sometimes laughs at his feelings or ironizes them, in an attempt to avoid them, or altogether
trivializes and doesn't own them.”

He shows himself immensely empathic and emotional when he is set to conquer. Just as he is
emotionally indifferent once it doesn't interest him anymore or when he abandons it for another
conquest.

The social E2 can go, from a deep subjectivity, to transgressing the norms thanks to his ease in
diverting responsibility for his acts, nullifying his emotions, justifying inadmissible deeds,
focusing all of his energy on the object of his ambition, above the current moral codes or certain
general conventions.

To avoid contact with his inner lack and vulnerability, he shows himself only from his surface,
with a hidden fear, keeping everyone from knowing his darker, more needy, and defective side.
Or rather he covers the mistakes he makes with lies and arrogance, defending himself with total
vehemence and a certain air of innocence, which overwhelms or pushes others away.

Egocentric
His zest for being in the center of attention; giving, organizing, doing, or talking, is another way
in which he pales in his sense of solitude and insufficiency, as he confirms the conviction in
being the center of the universe. He thinks that from this place no one will be able to question
him, nor degrade him by taking him away from the stage from which he receives a transient
admiration that he mistakes for love.

Ultimately, he is infatuated with himself; he is his most interesting conquest. In this perspective,
he interprets the behaviors of others as referring to himself, be it positively or negatively. And
demonstrates a great talent in entangling others for the satisfaction of his necessities.

Demanding and Hypercritical

Inside the social E2 there is a feracious and insatiable inner father, who shows himself
demanding, cold, and without compassion, in the form of two coexistent inner currents. One does
not tolerate that he diverts from the ambition and ideals that he has fixated. Only when reaching
them will he value himself positively, although for a brief period of time, which will rapidly turn
to another objective or territory to conquer. The other current, which flows in parallel, is an
aggressive intentionality, a buried anger not always conscious, which is normally directed at
himself, neglecting his personal care, health, resting times, or allowing himself to receive
affection or care.

The social E2 follows an interiorized message from the parents: “Whatever you do, it's never
enough.” Because of this he resorts to self-indulgence, occasionally; so that he can lower his own
prosecutory angst or negative judgements that he elaborates about himself, and which he sees in
the look of whom he has validated as an authority.

Sometimes, he can simulate withdrawal but as a way to demonstrate how without himself
nothing works.

And this anger against the self also finds a way of discharge onto others in competition or
despise.

As Karen Horney says, these are two sides of the same coin: “The proud develops a series of
values that determine what he accepts in himself, of which he must be glorified and be proud of.
But this system of values has to determine what must be rejected, disdained, and hated; and one
is inseparable from the other. Pride and self-hatred are two expressions of the same process.”

Depreciative
Similarly to E1, the social E2 has invalidated his progenitors in some way and has developed,
although this remains in the shadow, a profound despise for mistakes, imperfection, slowness,
stupidity, pessimism, or fragility, both in himself and others.
This devaluation starts to generate itself in the oedipal phase, with the polarization of the
maternal and paternal figures, where one is idealized and the other despised, and then afterwards
depreciating both. This leaves him, invariably, in a relational place in which he doesn't belong
and that is horizontal or above the parents. By devaluing them, he lacks parental figures to
idealize and with which to identify. This, in turn, will be the seed for not recognizing, as an
adult, the power-figures, self-referencing as the only trustworthy authority.

Rebellious and Tyrannical

Ever since childhood they have realized how being close to authority provides him a deal of
favors and benefits compared to his equals. They have learnt that holding privileged information
or taking part in decision-making gives him a certain power.

Thus, the social E2s characterize themselves by believing to know better than others or that they
are more efficient than the rest and by depreciating, like proper envious, others’ attributes. It is
truly complicated for them to give up authority for someone, above themselves and their own
convictions.

In many biographies of social E2s there are life-stories of certain intensity and instability. These
experiences, mixed with their ideas of grandiosity and importance, make him believe that they
have certain privileges or that they're above others. They could resemble a conservation E2 in
this; notwithstanding, they are different in that the ambitious do this from a manifested anger and
a superb and despot demandingness.

They have their own moral code, with which they decide what norms should or shouldn't be
respected. This regulamentation can change over time, at his whim, if the circumstances require
it, showcasing a total indifference to the ethical implications of other natures. They use and
abuse a selective memory in regards to responsibility in his issues.

The lack of clarity with respect to his roles and the absence of limits within the subsystems of the
family suppose the greatest obstacle for a social E2, to manage the tasks related to taking
authority. This character at times wants to be a brother (colleague), and at others, a father
(leader) to the group.

With his critical thinking, scathing and depreciative, and his narcissistic fantasy of omnipotence,
doubts that someone can lead him. Somehow stores in memory that one day he delivered
himself, naively, to his parents’ will, and was used and betrayed. Since then there is
suspiciousness towards authority.

Intolerant of limits
The social E2 doesn't realize that there are external limits to getting what he desires nor to his
possibilities. Curiously, given his aggressive and confrontational ways, neither does he know
how to impose them to others (even if through humiliation). Because he can't register abuse or
aggression as such, and may humiliate himself so as not to lose a relationship. Moreover, the
pain he feels in the possibility of loss isn't so much related to the bond itself as it is to contacting
the idea of not being worthy and the following abandonment, which would be an even greater
humiliation.

Intolerant of critics
Without relating to his own frustrations, the ego grows exponentially, because it is very difficult
for people of this subtype to sustain the possibility of failing or being defective to the eyes of
others, as well as risking himself to receive any type of criticism, which seem unbearable.

Competitive
Due to this exalted image of self there is no possible competition. If we were to ask a social E2
whether they are competitive, the answer would be a definitive no.

He “knows” that he is better and wants to be given the place he is due. And even though he can
maintain an attitude of temperance, security, and confidence, not always does it come to fruition.
Entering competition means wanting something one doesn't have and this could make him enter
contact with an inner lack, need, or with envy, which underlie his character; or even more
terrifying, with the emptiness that renders him incapable.

His ego cannot sustain the idea of there being a worthy enough adversary to be taken into
account. He has already defeated the most difficult and powerful one as a child; mommy or
daddy. Since then exists his taste for conquering the giant, only to then depreciate and abandon
it. The buried fear is that, if he can't, he will become what he is most afraid of being: useless.
Then will arrive despise and exhibit being abandoned, like in childhood, to a chaotic emotional
world and to solitude.

The person of this character has constituted her self-esteem around being worthy and useful to
others. If she can't achieve this, there's the threat of not being worthwhile and the following
abandonment. “Everyone leaves, or I make them” they may say, but that's nothing but another
way of confirming a narrative of orphan-hood and the need to be self-sufficient. Faced with this
failure, the social E2 recomposes himself, isolates fear, belittles the heart, freezes his emotions
and swears he will need no one.

Hunger of success and Blindness to failure

The person of this character has incorporated, early in life, the expectations that laid upon her,
which drove her to have exit in whatever it is that she purports to. Thus she is not, in absolute,
prepared to fail. Thanks to her fantasy, the defense mechanisms of repression and sublimation,
and her self-concept of grandiosity, she camouflages it so skilfully that it can't be seen.
Ever since she was little she would talk eloquently about herself as someone who does many
things, of which she is certain; and that “all” are done well, which is not as certain. The key is in
the adults believing her and giving motivation to keep being this way, so that she may feel
admired and also quite very powerful. Sees herself as capable of convincing others, including of
her lies. This way she incorporates an image of herself in which she is expected to do important
and innovative things, and that she is successful in all she does.

The social E2, when getting to adulthood, tries to reproduce the same situation imagining lots of
projects, and telling this as if it were done as a little boy or girl. Thus almost all energy is focused
on professional life, mistaking the conquering of territories with receiving love. This way he is
kept in contact with constant objectives that allow him to develop his self-image as competent
and admirable.

He is an expert in sublimating every setback and makes others see that, even under pressure, his
efforts don't cost him. Recollecting himself exhibits in his different personal and professional
campaigns, and this benefits him in such a way that he keeps the feeling of accomplishing
everything he purports himself. Nonetheless, even though he achieves important merits, he sells
more than he can give. In this light he can't see how many casualties have been left in his way,
and that he does not share, confirming his own neurosis.

Failure in the working ambit is one of the few opportunities a social E2 will have to realize how
far can his self-sabotage and the pain he inflicts on others.

All energy, creativity, effort, and passion that he puts in work is done in detriment to his personal
life. He sees all that is amorous, familiar, fraternal, or his own physical and mental health, as a
moorland he only visits. He has gotten to the point of forgetting to play, or enjoying the world of
love and affection; all of it to avoid connecting to his own vulnerability.

Taken to an extreme, the social E2 won't care about his alimentation, nor his health and most
basic and urgent necessities, that he considers inopportune, faced with tasks of higher priority,
that are the ones deserving of his attention.

When he fails, the social E2 hides at home or escapes by seeking big innovations in life:
changing his social surroundings, his partner or work, maybe even his country. Or he may have
refuge in different addictions, such as sex, drugs, gambling... or work, which is the most beloved
and prioritized thing for him. Among the Ennea-types, we may definitely define him as the
workaholic.

If he can't keep a romantic relationship, he will center on friendships to deaden the emptiness.
Even then, if he fails professionally, projects are redirected to the partner with bigger
expectations and demands, planning trips, setting rules to her life and trying to “improve” her, as
if he had the strategic manual of the good partner; in this way he projects his own ambition onto
the other.

This obsessive drive to success may manifest itself in the formula of “it's never enough,”
coincident with the message received from the maternal figure: “you are not, and not ever,
enough.” Every goal accomplished isn't turned to anything if not the fragile confirmation of his
grandiosity and indispensability, but the emptiness is insatiable and demands constant conquers
and astounding deeds.

Envious
Envy is the monster of the social E2. Realizing that he envies would be contacting needs,
something he lacks, and this would lead him to inadequacy and the emotional void. Contrary to
E4, he uses envy as a drive to overcome himself, as a jumpstart to conquer what another has. But
the things, as they are; his eye is aimed at the other; what power they hold, what talents, or gifts
that he hasn't. Of course that, again in contrast to the E4, this character feeling envy doesn't result
in a way to be seen. To be admired he must be useful.

In the social two, the passion of pride manifests itself as a satisfaction in the conquest of the
public. To awaken a great passion you may not need to develop much intelligence, or pretend it,
but a social two could never be enough to be considered a dumb blonde. A social two needs to be
someone, and in order to be someone you need to use your mind more.

Being a person who wants to be important to be able to feed his pride, he must be able to seduce
the social environment, becoming a seducer of groups, a distinguished being and, perhaps, not
only someone superior, but with a gift of leadership. Ichazo spoke of ambition, but we could say
that it is a passion to be in a certain sense above; and through such being above, having influence
and having advantages. This is the type of person who presents himself to the world as great or
important, unlike the sexual E2, who is mainly interested in being important to his partner, or the
conservation type, which, as we will see, is a counter-two.

The social two stand above their parents in a way that is not authoritarian, but ambivalent. On the
one hand it adopts the role of authority, on the other it wants to acquire from authority all the
power to shine. As they say, the social two want to "sit to the right of the father". At the
psychiatric level, when a social two enters a psychotic crisis it usually happens that he deludes in
a manic sense frequently believing — at least in our culture — that he is the reincarnation of
Jesus Christ. The mythological image of Christ accompanies well the manic structure of the
social two, characterized by pseudo-generosity, by the inner idealization of affection and by a
feeling of superiority. The first movement towards transformation then consists in putting
oneself in the right place in relation to the parents: the place of the child. In other words, the
social two has to be contained by the authority of the parents.
The social two shows a narcissism based on territorial and sexual competition. The need to
distinguish and conquer in these areas is the consequence of a shift from affective self-esteem to
territorial self-esteem. The fundamental traumatic experience has to do with a maternal affective
deprivation that leads to a state of deep despair, a feeling of not being loved. The sense of
loneliness and deep lack — an essentially depressive experience — is transformed into a sense of
incapacity and inferiority in competition for territory or for the conquest of the couple. Thus, we
move from the system of affection, warmth and affectivity to the reptilian system, relationally
cold but capable of generating the enthusiastic impulse of the conquest of the territory and the
domain of the couple.

The positive emotions that emerge from the reptilian area of the brain have to do with an
authentic manic force characterized by enthusiasm, by a firm confidence in one's own abilities
and in one's own perceptions, by a tendency to rapture and by a certain sense of the brightness of
objectives that the manic state makes perceive as within reach. The warmth of positive
sensations, enlarged by the preeminence of visceral behavior, takes its place in the absence of
true intimacy in relationships, where there is a deep affective devaluation. Devaluation and the
consequent depression translates into estrangement through feelings of indifference and hatred,
so that a certain autistic estrangement in affective relationships is common, accompanied by a
disdainful and contemptuous attitude. Just as a child usually demonstrates an attitude of rabid
indifference in relation to the mother who moved away for a long period, likewise, the
mammalian heart of the social two distances itself from the affective relationship. In fact, at the
bottom of the deep wound of affection of the social two there is a lack of despair that, when
reactivated, produces a cooling of relational potentiality, a coldness that is transformed into
indifference and emotional disinterest. Likewise, erotic mania leads to a constant attitude of
sexual seduction, another source of warming in the face of the maternal heat vacuum.

E2 - Sexual
Aggressive
The sexual E2 finds it difficult to ask. He is incapable of frankly asking for fear of appearing as a
human being and not a divine being, so he allows himself to manipulate and adopt an exigent
position. Pushing and invading, he takes up more space than the space that is his. He adopts the
posture of a deserving narcissist. The vital strategy that he brings into play evokes the obtention
of a larger space in terms of attention within his original family.

He is impulsive and his motto is: “make love and war.” When he’s going after a goal, he doesn’t
look around, and instead focuses exclusively on his desires, which he confuses with real needs.
His aggressiveness is expressed in the form of impulsion in the action. Raising his voice, buying
the other with affection or whatever he lacks, making a scene and, similarly to the E8, the end
justifies the means and the intensity of the action leads to emotional disconnection, which is
sometimes confused with the lusty character. This whole mechanism hides the difficulty in
tolerating frustration, limits, and the word “no” as an insurmountable barrier; a border that, in its
exaggerated dimensions, feels like humiliation.

The person of this character can become violent, brash, and disdainful. In intimacy, upon
reaching a certain threshold of frustration, he reacts with indifference or abandonment without
too much contemplation or wasted time. He makes up for the loss by continuing his seduction
with another candidate, and covers in this way the feelings of loss, frustration, and pain.

In this attitude he differs from the social E2, who expresses more aggressiveness in the
intellectual aspect, with arguments and explanations. And, above all, he differs from the
conservation E2, where aggressiveness is hidden under a childish halo of huffs and tantrums
more than an explicit violence, and can be turned against himself, in accordance with the
gestaltica mechanism of retroflexion. This is something hardly seen in the sexual E2, who is
fully capable of pouring all his impulse outwards.

Hypersensitive
Pride is sustained through an aggrandized self-image that, occasionally, has to be protected from
the world. When he faces confrontation, criticism… or even at the smallest attack on his image,
the prideful response is immediate. The volume of the response has little to do with the stimulus,
but rather obeys to his hypersensitivity.

When an arrow trespasses the ego defenses and hits right in the middle of the conscience,
unveiling a lie or falsehood, he explodes in hyperreactivity, in the face of a painful concern that
he cannot tolerate. Before letting himself be hurt, before recognizing this truth that would destroy
his ego-construction, at the slightest scratch in his self-image, he automatically gets the impulse
to defend himself from the attack. He tells himself that pride is an emotional state that is “easy to
hurt.” It is simply an ancient and primal humiliation that hurt him as a child, and left him without
the capacity to distinguish between having boundaries, being criticized, and being humiliated.

The “thin skin” may or may not be conscious, depending on the level of maturity. But what
differentiates the sexual E2 from the other subtypes is the “spontaneous” compulsivity of the
reaction, this automatism of maximum “freedom of expression” of the impulse.

Idolization of desire
The passion of the sexual E2 is to feel passion. The passion of being dragged and of dragging
through the intensity of an idealized and generalized love. Live out the impulse that gives him
meaning and strength, in a way that makes it difficult to refuse or postpone any desire, especially
in love. The desire is converted into an uninhibited momentum in search of immediate
gratification, with manipulative strategies, whatever it takes. He is, in this way, impatient and
fickle, chasing what he doesn’t have but believes he deserves.
The most important desire is the desire to be loved and pleased, that of being special in
love. It is difficult for the sexual E2 to accept: that which he needs most, he is unwilling to
give in. That is what he needs is to learn to love. So his difficulty is in the romantic
commitment, compromise, and depth.

He searches for a type of love that serves a neurotic need that could never be satisfied. That
which he lacks is what he now searches for unconsciously, and he does this by repeating a type
of deficient love based on seduction in the place of this being provided by his parents in the
family. His tank is empty, this painful sensation that indicates that not everything is so great and
so full of love, bordering on envy and putting in danger the whole ego structure.

Impulsive and Without limits

Someone so wild and impulsive needs freedom. This happens due to a lack of limits; he takes
pleasure in violating the rules, in the name of feeling more than thinking. As affirms a sexual E2:
“for me, rules are simply optional guidelines.”

There is, in this character, a phobia of feeling the limits imposed on him by external forces. The
addiction to the emotional state of the moment gives him an air of freedom that can be confused
with the spontaneous truth that, in reality, responds to a difficulty in renouncing the immediate
gratification of the impulse. It is for this reason that he appears incongruent and irresponsible.

The sexual E2, since childhood, is used to getting what he wants, like an echo of the oedipal
situation in which he got a place of intimacy with the parent of the opposite sex. A place that did
not belong to him and that he achieved through seduction—induced ambiguously by his own
father or mother—while displacing the parent of the same sex, with whom he has, generally, a
conflictive relationship.

He is the wildest and most free of the E2 subtypes. Much more than the conservation E2, without
going further, who adopts an infantile position with the sacrifice of a big part of his liberty in
order to obtain a privileged relation with the parents, and has to be the best boy or the best girl,
which leads to a greater loss of free and spontaneous impulse.

Freedom or, rather, the feeling of being “free” is related with the lack of limits, which were never
imposed on him, or that came from an excessive authority that was seduced to overcome the fear
of being crushed to death.

Dependent
Apparently independent, he flaunts his freedom, which he confuses with debauchery. But in
reality it is a hidden, sly dependence; a dependence that is unspeakable even to himself for it
would shatter his idealized image. He needs the other to feel validated, as well as this contact,
affective and carnal, where he obtains what he desires.
In denying the lack, the reason the person comes to therapy is usually a relationship issue, where
he feels abandoned and the edifice that sustains his pride is destroyed.

Histrionic
Currently the word “histrionic” is used to define the whole emotional stage of the E2 character,
especially the sexual E2, who is a specialist in dramatizing emotion. He is also called
“histrionic,” for his intense feeling of emotionality and impulsivity; the emotion goes far beyond
reason, and is prone to “emotional outbursts.” But the word histrionic is very precise and refers
to his theatricality.

The staging of this emotional scene may have nothing to do with his profound emotions. It is
only a representation to obtain something else, while hiding the real need that triggered the
energetic mobilization. Oftentimes this is unconscious, as all the motivation or sensation is
related to the aspect of deficiency, to something that doesn’t align with his aggrandized self-
image, so it is relegated to the unconscious through the principal mechanism of the E2:
repression. While staging scenes is characteristic of the E2 in general, the expansive and
aggressive theatrical capacity of the sexual E2 makes him the most scandalous and shameless
subtype.

Histrionics is, in the sexual E2, particularly obvious. As much as he is a prisoner of the shell of
his character, he is the best actor specialized in expressing warmth in his distinct declensions. He
differs from the conservation and social E2 due to his free and shameless expression of passion.
He can surrender to his effusions so much that he lacks the words to express all that he feels and
neither his eyes, nor his hands, nor his whole body are enough to communicate his feelings; he
wants to break through the other with his voice, with his gaze, and with the fire of his passion.

The very impetuous personalities are still very much capable of expressing rage and struggle, in
an emotional catharsis similar to what an actor experiences during a climactic scene. Through
seduction he can attain new, higher levels of creativity and expressive wealth: catlike rhythm,
submissive gaze that wants to penetrate the other, a mix of tenderness and force, of heat and
instinct, a great liberty in physical contact, a natural disinhibition to nakedness, and all sorts of
expressions of eroticism that produce an enormous pleasure.

Rebel and Transgressor

In the E2 lives the pitiful sensation of being a fraud, which makes him feel like a fake and, thus,
guilty. One of the ways of escaping this is disinhibition and the transgression of the social rules,
not as a result of some real autonomy of judgment and action, but rather as an expression of the
neurotic need to stand out, with the end goal of obtaining admiration from the people that arouse
his interest.
The sexual subtype takes this to the field of erotic-affective relations, including love triangles.
He considers himself a depository for new social rules through sexual freedom, with an
exhibition of vitality and a feeling of superiority in regards to the most common relationship
bonds.

It is not difficult for the sexual E2 to become an advocate for the triumphs of the libido, even
with modalities that are provocative or scandalous according to common sense, like a form of
narcissistic self-satisfaction.

He needs to feel exalted in relationships where he imagines himself to be at the center of the
other’s desires, and intensely emotional, without which he feels dry, empty, threatened by the
isolation and dangerously sad. All this is accompanied by the fantasy that it is the others who
need his welcoming generosity, when in reality it is he who needs to constantly feel validated in
his worth.

Hedonist
The sexual E2 is a hedonist; his search for pleasure serves the avoidance of pain and of any
situation that could potentially lead to frustration, which he cannot tolerate. How could someone
tell him no? Or not respond to his need to be adored!

To avoid facing this limit he can entangle the other in a persistent promise of pleasure. These
seduction games quench the sexual E2’s hedonism as well as his need to break the routine with
new experiences. As pointed out by Claudio Naranjo, the desire for pleasure can be considered a
substitute for it; and the E2, with his need to eliminate any problematic, bothersome, or non-
gratifying part of his life, searches for it in love. His low tolerance to frustration, when he doesn’t
feel wanted, leads him to a state of anger and agitation that serves to break the dreaded routine.

Hedonism turns him into a consumerist of relations and objects, as he is indulgent in his intense
desire to give and to obtain pleasure.

Idealized self-image
The sexual E2’s image is inflated and grandiose. Radiant and magnificent in fantasy, he is not
grounded in reality and facts. It is a dream, but a contagious dream, that convinces himself and
others. It is different from the E3’s narcissism, whose marketing of the image is endorsed by
titles, by an agenda full of concrete things he has achieved, by hours spent at the gym, by a big
wardrobe, or by an excessive taste for cosmetics and plastic surgery.

The image of the vampire, of the femme fatale, who needs to taste and attract, is the ideal
compensation from a childhood wound. And the energy invested in preventing this idealized
image from crumbling is what provokes a disconnection from the depth of himself.
This theatricalized image, putting on a scene with all the attributes of a liar, made up of intimate
music in the voice’s tone, provocation in seductive gestures and in the clothing, and of a
suspiciously exaggerated capacity to give.

Lack of consequences
In this discrepancy between the reality and the self-image, the sexual E2 imagines himself as
great, generous, and helpful.

He lives in the present in an excessive manner, as if to accord himself today what was promised
yesterday. He tells you: “I’m going to help you” with everything. Or: “you know you can always
count on me.” Or: “I’ll support you in everything you do.” But when the time comes, the promise
is not translated into concrete action. It’s more of a sentiment that exists in that given moment,
the fruit of an emotional impulse that sustains his image. And when the occasion comes, there is
not much of a service provided.

Universal donor
Someone who feels so superior to others believes that he has much to give in every sense.
Someone who continually flees pain, and searches for pleasure through love, cannot give
precisely that; love, as he doesn’t have any. But on the contrary, he presents himself as a great
donor of love.

Given his feeling of prideful superiority, his high principles in life, love and relationships lead
him to see himself as a moral wonder, so he stops taking into account the consequences of his
actions as being real.

By structuring his character, his need for affection and to feel like the center of the world
transforms into the act of giving love and care. And in all this giving, one thought never leaves
him: he hopes that others will recognize all that he has done for them. In his aggrandizement, he
pays more attention to what he will receive than what he does for others. It is a continuous action
to ensure that others see him, and with a self-image so great, the gratefulness he expects never
comes, which causes the pertinacious frustration.

This effort is characteristic to the sexual E2, which can in turn inflate his ego, conjuring in this
way the buried idea of not deserving of his internal humiliated counterpart.

Anti-intellectual
The sexual E2 is the most emotional. The sexual E4, also expert in very intense and dramatic
emotional manifestations, values nevertheless a more intellectual component in order to exercise
sufficient competency in argumentation. In the sexual E2, the incontestable argument is his
emotion; things are determined because “I feel this way.” This is his assertiveness, based in his
feeling more than thinking and that, in his impetuous disinhibition, brings him a false sense of
security and the propensity to be able to obtain everything.

His understanding of reality is based more in emotion than in an objective vision of the facts;
emotion contaminates everything in the present moment, and in the name of emotion anything
goes. He passionately identifies with emotion and is not interested in the logical world and in
structured thought, which seem burdensome and arid to him.

The cognitive or intellectual capacity is devalued in all E2s. It is true that this trait is less present
in the social E2, who creates a self-image of a responsive, serious hyper-adult. The conservation
E2, identifying deeply with his basic needs, are the most interested in concrete actions to obtain
what they need. The sexual E2 feels more than he thinks, and values the emotional and
sentimental world much more than the cognitive. This attitude finds its origin in the main
defense mechanism: repression.

Competitive
The competitive field for the sexual E2 is above all in sentimental relationships. His struggle to
feel unique and unforgettable becomes concrete the moment a third person appears and has the
potential to overshadow him. In this case he can turn to a passionate lovesick energy, even
though it isn’t clear whether he is interested in the object or in the competition. He also doesn’t
ask himself if he desires a lover or a friend, because his interest lies in beating the competitor in
order to feel that he is the best in the eyes of anyone. He feels his passion, and believes it, but
once he charges forward the prey might no longer have any value for him.

Unconventional
The gestures of the sexual E2 are open, informal, and relaxed. He seems spontaneous and
laidback, he feels at home everywhere and occupies a large space that he invades. He is
unconventional in his characteristics, as much in his clothing as in his behavior, since he loves to
break the mold, he wants to stand out from others at all costs. He is capable of doing in public
things that others would only do privately, like taking off his shoes, putting his feet on the couch,
showing a scar on a private body part, sleeping in the middle of a meeting, etc., regardless of
social conventions. He wants to “do whatever I want, wherever I want, with whomever I want.”
He is therefore a provocateur, sweetened by his seductive strategies and by his fear of rejection.

Erotic movements
The energy reaches the most distal parts of the body, giving the skin a warm and rosy
appearance. The look, lively and bright, will denote the emotional state in which the person is, a
trait that it shares with the rest of the rigid characters of the bioenergetic classification. Already
more specific to E2 is the muscular armor in the form of “chain mail,” a form of defense that it
shares with the E7, and that supposes a systematic and general rigidity. This “mesh,” which is
distributed just below the skin, at the level of the fasciae, is a very efficient mechanism for
draining anguish, as it redistributes static energy throughout the body surface. In the old art of
war, chain mail was a metallic armor made up of iron or steel rings intertwined with each other
in such a way that the energy of any blow was dissipated between all the rings; in short, an
effective formula to absorb bumps and minimize damage.

This efficient drainage makes the E2 and, especially, the sexual E2, rarely experience anguish.
This is converted into soft and undulating movements, erotically charged and that often confuse
the interlocutor, who receives a double message: on the one hand, of provocation; on the other
hand, of not taking responsibility for the intentionality of the movement, which is removed from
consciousness through the psychic defense mechanism of repression. Its erotic, seductive
movement provokes sexual reactions when in reality this is not its function.

This sensual, undulating movement, provided by the muscular defense in “chain mail,” allows a
differential diagnosis to be established with other characters that do not have this representative
agility and mobility.

Seemingly loose hips

Juanjo Albert affirms, speaking of the hysterical character (the E2): “The defensive function of
erotic pseudo-contact and genital sexuality is carried out through its specialization and training to
detect the risk of commitment and emotional delivery, and withdraw immediately when that's
how it happens.” The most extreme form of an E2 sexual Enneatype gait is the spitting image of
the vampire, whose seductiveness is conveyed not only by her sinuous and exaggerated
movements but also through the tone of her voice, the emphasis of her phrasing, her captivating
gaze, her voluptuousness expression, and the swaying of the hip, which suggests a promise of
orgasm without guarantee.

This typical contouring, as well as the retracted position of the hip, could mean health and
connection with sexuality, but in reality it does not. E2’s “charged pelvis” is energetically ready
to express its force through orgasm, but discharge movements are limited by its rigidity, with
reduced anterior pelvic excursion.

Affectivity disconnected from sexuality

The apparent freedom and looseness of her hip hides the main conflict of this character. This
movement is not fully connected to the chest, due to one of its main tensions, in the diaphragm.
This is the most active muscle in breathing, so it is involved in the perception and expression of
the emotional world. Responsible for increasing or decreasing the signal that is perceived in the
chest, it favors or prevents the passage of impulses that come from both the abdomen and the
hip, that is, from the world of needs or sexuality, respectively. In this character, the diaphragm is
contracted enough that the energetic connection between the hips and the chest is compromised.
The diaphragmatic contraction dissociates affections and needs, disconnects the emotional world
of sexuality. We cannot speak of a diaphragmatic blockage in a character with emotional
connection and expression, but we can speak of a tension that hinders the energetic passage.

Difficulty in delivery
It can be affirmed, reading the tensions and blockages of the sexual E2 body, that there is a
difficulty in deep loving surrender, and this is its most significant split.

As Lowen puts it, “Today's hysterical character does not refer to genital contact but to deep,
loving feelings.” That is why tantric practice, bioenergetics, integrative body therapy,
psychodance, or any other body technique whose objective is the union of the genital impulse
with the love impulse have great healing potential for this character.

Cheerful
Compared to the other subtypes of the passion of pride, the sexual one presents a look of
contentment and expansive joy. There it differs from the social E2, whose expression is less
static, a little more serious and stiff, due to the feeling of importance that invades him. That same
joy and smile of the sexual E2 are accompanied, in the conservation subtype, by a look and a
boyish face, which often makes it seem younger than it is.

Big spender
Money provides this character with crucial autonomy. Here too, the sexual E2 relies on his own
resources: showing his economic needs humiliates him, and his independence is more a gesture
of pride than of inner freedom.

Economic resources are subordinated to emotional ones and to the need for intimate contact. The
sexual E2 shows carelessness in saving or in the possession of goods. It may have to do with a
basic arrogance and the need for immediate satisfaction in the intensity of the moment. He
therefore tends to spend what he earns, but more on others than on himself.

Lack of care can lead to not managing money, not checking your accounts, not knowing how
much you earn, or not repaying loans.

The power that the sexual E2 entrusts to money is, therefore, that of being at the service of
significant relationships, to receive affection and admiration in return. The way to obtain them
ranges from generously providing the children's decorations to giving wonderful gifts to the
couple or friends, and in this way feel great and make the other feel that he is the center of her
attention. He even puts his own survival at risk by following a romantic ideal of generosity,
which prevails over any other consideration.

Due to the hunger for love, the sexual E2 experiences more pleasure in giving and spending than
in retaining or possessing. For him, the pride of “giving” is an overcompensation for lack, for the
painful feeling of worthlessness. This is what leads him to overreact. Under the mask of
abundance, the counterpart of the miserable beggar is manifested through the ghost of the fail. It
is precisely this opposite that leads to excessive self-sacrifice: if he does not feel he deserves love
for himself, he makes sure that he at least deserves it for the services rendered.

Fear of failure
In his relationship dynamic, where he is the one who gives and not the one who receives, the
sexual E2 has a hard time imagining that someone could take care of him, if necessary. From his
pride he can demand but not ask, since a refusal would do him a lot of damage. This, together
with the need for freedom and autonomy, favors the ghost of failure, because he imagines that if
he is not capable of giving, he will not have a place in the world, he will be alone.

The sexual two is the E2 par excellence, because if we say that this character is a seducer, we can
also add that the sexual two is the most visibly seductive of all. In American enneagram culture it
is more common to say that the two is a ―helper‖, in view of my characterization of the E2 in
the 1970s as a ―Jewish mother‖, but this has the drawback of a lack of discrimination regarding
the difference between a truly helpful character and one that rather seeks affection and
recognition through kindness. These are people who can say, ―I'll do anything for you,‖ but
when the opportunity comes to charge them for such an offer, it becomes clear that they are
inconsistent with their offers of help. That is why it seems more accurate to me to say that the
central theme is seduction (that is, an expression of affection through which interest, loyalty,
affection, protection, etc., of others is intended), and only apparently help. The term vampiress
proves a lot, and so does the expression femme fatale. Both refer to a beautiful person, but
dangerously beautiful, who needs to hold you and could end up devouring you.

The sexual E2's need to seduce implies a need for the other's desire; But to say that desire is only
sexual would be to see only what is most apparent; researching the matter by asking such people
what they want may yield more original responses, such as ―I want everything.‖ Just as we think
of Helen of Troy as an archetype of the woman for whom a war is waged and for whom men are
willing to lose their lives, we can say that sexual E2s aspire to an irresistibility that can inspire
greatest passions. It's just that most of these people can't be honest enough to say, ―What I
really want in a man is for him to be a pocket Samson,‖ or ―I want a giant who will give me
everything I want and when I want it.‖ It is understandable that some people think that inspiring a
great passion can be a way to solve everything in life, and that sexuality can involve money,
castles and essentially blank checks: that is how the sexual two thinks.

A sexual two can justify to himself many acts, words, madness, destruction and self-centeredness
in pursuit of love. As if love were the only emotion, the center of life, that experience that
justifies everything…

This person has formed an image of himself as someone desirable, lovable, affectionate,
warm, a good company, a person who occupies the hearts of others. Thus, he justifies all his acts
in pursuit of amorousness. But this love is confused with liking, enchanting, seducing, attracting,
always occupying that special place in its own right.

. But this being often avoids such an experience of abandonment, of love failure, abandoning
before they abandon him. So the first step to healing is not to give up, to be vulnerable to
abandonment, to stay. The next is to feel the abandonment, to listen to the causes of that
abandonment, to be able to hear that he is not the wonderful lover he thought he was, that he is
not the only one. Fall off the cherry. Let it hurt. Feeling on the side of those who suffer, of those
who are not chosen:
―The abandonment, how is it possible that I, who is the ideal lover, is the one they left?
Thus a great tower of my pride collapsed. My neurotic passion kept me from love.--

The destructive is a neurotic reaction to frustration. I don't get what I want, it hurts, but it is an
egoic pain, linked to pride, by not accepting the ―no‖. So, here we can have a very destructive
behavior towards ourselves in relation to food, the body, sexuality. We perceive the ―no‖ as
withdrawal from love, and if the other does not love me, life is not worth living. Inside, there is a
feeling of fury, of rage, which we immediately emotionalize towards crying. It may even be
believable to us, it may seem like real pain, but it's a scene, it's an ego. Pain has another flavor,
another depth.

In sexual E2, seduction is sexual because it has a strong component of wanting to catch the other,
possessing him... But this craving is not limited to sex, which is only the first layer. If we
continue to deepen, we can see and feel the seductive mechanism that is present in the eagerness
to help, in goodness, in good intentions, in holiness... Seduction and pride create an image of an
unquestionable person; someone who does not let his darkness, his bad intentions be seen,
someone who has great difficulty in showing his lack... So? It is necessary to go very deep to be
able to see that what is behind this image that we present is a fierce criticism, a condemnatory
judge of what we can call negative feelings. The way is not to reject them, but to see them, to
understand them, to take them: "I am that too", until they fall into smallness, into humility. ―It
is good for me to bow down, kneel down, feel my smallness, the greatness of God, of Life, of
those around me, recognize their virtues....‖

E2- Self-Preservation
Dependent
Of the three subtypes, this is the most dependent, although he shows a self-sufficient and
independent façade. He distances himself from his family with the idea that distance will
diminish his dependence, but it does not, because he compulsively establishes dependent
relationships to ensure his protection and survival. He is chameleonic and his great intuitive
capacity allows him to captivate others.
He seeks to relate to people with a strong character to compensate for his insecurity, but with this
he “loses” his freedom, sticking to the role of being loved for being cheerful.

He projects aggression because he does not contact with courage, which would allow him to set
limits, since he lives wanting to please everyone.

Shy
It is a very noticeable trait in this childish character. Shyness is related to the fear of exposing
oneself if there is no certainty of recognition.

The passion of privilege hides a search for confirmation and a deep lack of self-esteem. Since
this character does not want to acknowledge that he has limits and also does not contact this low
self-esteem, he hides if he is not sure he will succeed. He prefers to hide behind “I don't know,”
“I don't want to,” or “I can't,” in a childish way, rather than not admit that he does not feel he
does not measure up. He also plays shyness and shame as a childish charm of a seductive nature,
with which he avoids confrontation.

Victim
He tends to project blame, as seduction tries to make you see only what others want to see. The
crazy idea behind it is that “to be accepted you have to hide the bad.” He blames the world for
his difficulties and problems, otherwise he would have to take responsibility for his actions and
change. It is easy for him to act as a victim when he does not feel understood or appreciated,
although most of the time he prefers to close the chapter and leave the relationship.

Idealizer
When you are a child and depend on adults in every way, you idealize them by seeing them as
great, decisive, capable, protective, independent, and determined. If those adults around him do
not give him time to digest what is happening to him and thus make his own decisions, the
conservation E2 learns to leave them in the hands of the elders.

The conflict is that he arrives at maturity with an idealized image of what it is to be an adult,
assuming that upon reaching adulthood, getting married, having children or starting to work, the
characteristics of an adult will magically and automatically emerge in him.

Compares
This type of E2 has an inordinately high criterion of competence, that is to say, a perfectionist
and obsessive ideal self, which is what makes him so motor. This stems from a feeling of
inferiority for not feeling loved and, on the contrary, abandonable. The difference with E4 is that
he uses pride to get love and not to be abandoned. The conflict is that he lives comparing
himself, disadvantageously and advantageously, with everyone. This fosters a disdainful attitude
(raised nose), like royalty looking down on others.

Necessity
The underlying theme of the conservation E2 is that he doesn't feel valuable enough or worthy of
being loved. So he does things for others, seeking to be needed, because he assumes he won't be
abandoned and the other will return protection. He doesn't realize that he ends up getting
overwhelmed and angry when he is asked for something. And, as he doesn't know how to set
limits, he does it with attitudes of rejection and annoyance, looking more like a tantrum child.

Fantasizer
Many conservation E2s read avidly since they were children, seeking to feed their emotions.
Claudio defines them in his workshops as constrained adventurers, that is, they long to feel free
and to travel and to be able to do and undo and, failing that, they read. Above all, they read
novels that allow them to break taboos, which they assume “bind” them. They feel that their
reality is too narrow, and in fantasy they achieve things they would not otherwise achieve.

Tomboys
Physically they tend to be swallowing girls, reflecting less age than they are. Women wear little
or no makeup and relate better to men than to women, behaving asexually with them.

Condescending
As the conservation E2 believes that he is only loved when he is nice and good, he tends to be
condescending (he says yes to everything), without stopping to think about whether he wants it
or not. This leads him to accept commitments that later weigh him down and he reluctantly
fulfills or abandons without warning.

In condescension there is a disdainful tinge towards others, a look that considers them inferior
beings in need of support and affection. Sometimes, it is mixed with humor producing mockery,
sarcasm, or cynicism.

Hypersensitive to criticism
Difficulty in making self-criticism and receiving criticism from those around him triggers the
core of devaluation he keeps inside. It manifests itself with irritability, crying and feelings of
incomprehension and anger, since it awakens the fear of not being accepted and, therefore, loved.

It is difficult for a conservation E2 to accept his mistakes. Even if he knows he is incompetent or

expresses it: that is far from being able to tolerate having his faults and shortcomings pointed out
to him. This is seen in his outbursts and anger, which can end in emotional explosions full of
claims to the one who criticizes him.
Envious and Fear of envy
The conservation E2 seems not to experience envy at first glance, since he compensates for his
downward comparisons by showing an attitude of abundance and superiority. Envy, human and
inevitable, is hidden as a way of covering up shortcomings and avoiding competitive
disadvantage. He can live it secretly, letting out some lapses of indifference and apathy for the
people he envies.

The person of this character not only hides envy to himself and others. He is also afraid of being
envied, because it remains unprotected. To feel the envy of others is to expose that one is
powerful, that one has something that others want. And she fears the aggression of others. Being
envied, she could be the object of rejection, criticism, and disaffection; so she will flatter and
dissimulate to cover up her privileges or most desired qualities, she would even show herself to
be anti-pride, in order to be safe and sound.

Tender
The meaning of “tender” is someone who is affectionate, loving and kind. It generally refers to
childhood, to explain a delicate and docile way of being because of one's young age and
experience. The conservation E2 is a person who especially highlights these traits, who invites
that soft and gentle experience. This characteristic, in which she conducts herself with utmost
naturalness, is a way of attracting protection, of being cared for, which guarantees her to remain
intact and away from the complications of the rough and tumble of life and relationships.

Possessive
The possessiveness of the conservation E2 arises from the desire to merge with the other, in
search of the security that he is always available, to ensure that he does not live the experience of
abandonment, or the protection and satisfaction of his basic needs.

Possessiveness also has to do with the difficulty of seeing people as “other,” different, and
independent. For this character, this would be a threatening mirror of his fear of emotional
independence. In the end, the other is an object over which to exercise power.

Jealous
Jealousy, typical of emotional characters, is in conservation E2 connected with the neurotic need
to be the only one in the place of privilege, in the heart and in the life of the other. They also
have their roots in the triangulation experienced as a child, when the father or the mother
involved him in their jealous competition against each other.

Arrogant and Egocentric

The proud arrogance of this character manifests itself above all in believing that what he wants
or thinks must always be taken into account and confirmed. It is not that he believes he is
intellectually right; it is rather the arrogance of one who claims in the first place, a capricious
haughtiness.

Sadistic
The sadism of conservation E2 seems contradictory to his tenderness and condescension. It is
expressed in an evident way when he feels not consented to or betrayed (in the sense of not
satisfied in what he wants). If the other is not at his service or attentive to him, he will easily be
the object of raw rage and mistreatment reinforced by the intuitive capacity of this character to
“catch” the weak side of the other. It is also sadistic in its way of coldly wounding and leaving
the other with no possibility of rescue.

Paranoid and Controlling

Paranoia explores in an obsessive and emotionally blind way when the conservation E2 projects
on the other the manipulative dynamics that he himself practices when he wants to please or
conquer the powerful place of privilege. When he feels that someone does not support him
unconditionally, or has to confront someone he considers superior for some characteristic, he
immediately feels him as a rival, an enemy that can take away his place. There he deploys his
aggressive and controlling weapons with the crazy idea of having the right to attack whoever
threatens him, even fantasizing plots.

Castrating and Vindictive

If someone disappoints him or feels him in competition, he is very skilled at humiliating and
attacking them to the point of making them a harmless rival. This manifests itself especially in
couple or sibling relationships, as if he feels entitled to make the other pay the price for being
submissive to his orders or whims. But also if he feels offended, criticized, or abandoned, taking
away the other's power is a way of taking revenge and thus re-establishing his pre-eminence.

Self-indulgent
As a character based on the idealization of himself, he forgives everything. This forgiveness
shows his intolerance of limits and reiterates his childish attitude, whereby everything must be
allowed. He thus compensates for frustration or contact with low self-esteem, hidden by the
permissiveness granted to a child. It is a trait in short circuit with the fear of being an adult.

Inconstant
The conservation E2 is intolerant of discipline; any work that entails effort or renunciation is
seen by him as something impossible to sustain. Obviously, he justifies himself with lies or
devaluing the objective. He also solves the obstacle by delegating the task. This dynamic is basic
to remain dependent on the other and to nurture his pride, unaware of how this intolerance
prevents him from regaining inner security as an adult.

Claudio Naranjo's Self-Preservation 2 Description[1]

E2 Conservation – Privilege

In the conservative E2, seduction can be compared to that of a child towards parents. Just as the
social type appears large, this is someone who is seen as small, childish, in their attitudes and
even in their physical features. Just as the social two seems hyper-adult, over-mature, and the
sexual E2 —like Bizet's Carmen— appears as a wild, force of nature, the conservation E2 seems
tender and childish.

Precisely, psychoanalysts called this infantile character. Ichazo used for his characteristic
neurotic need the expression: “I, the most important thing”, which in his day I misunderstood
when I thought that it designated the Napoleonic attitude of one who shows off his chest. Finally,
I came to understand that, unlike an ambitious person's desire for importance, this “me, the most
important thing” of the conservational type refers to infantile egocentrism, which is a desire to be
in the center of attention without having to be important through qualifications, performances or
feats. For the child wants to be loved not for this or that, but simply because; that is, for being
what he or she is.

What is most prominent in this human type, then, is the need for love, the naked need for love,
obtained neither by sexual seduction nor by social self-importance.

But why would a person have the need to remain childish or to act like a child? Naturally, there
is some advantage in this. They like children more than adults, and babies are very attractive to
people of a motherly disposition. We can say that the infantile traits themselves are seductive,
and that the neurotic need of that human type is one to seduce through infantility — which
implies a need for tenderness, delicacy and fragility, although it also implies self-centeredness
and evasion of responsibilities.

In the conservative E2, seduction can be compared to that of a child towards parents. Just as the
social type appears large, this is someone who is seen as small, childish, in their attitudes and
even in their physical features. Just as the social two seems hyper-adult, over-mature, and the
sexual E2 —like Bizet's Carmen— appears as a wild, force of nature, the conservation E2 seems
tender and childish.

Precisely, psychoanalysts called this infantile character. Ichazo used for his characteristic
neurotic need the expression: ―I, the most important thing‖, which in his day I misunderstood
when I thought that it designated the Napoleonic attitude of one who shows off his chest. Finally,
I came to understand that, unlike an ambitious person's desire for importance, this ―me, the
most

important thing‖ of the conservational type refers to infantile egocentrism, which is a desire to be
in the center of attention without having to be important through qualifications, performances or
feats. For the child wants to be loved not for this or that, but simply because; that is, for being
what he or she is.

What is most prominent in this human type, then, is the need for love, the naked need for
love, obtained neither by sexual seduction nor by social self-importance.
But why would a person have the need to remain childish or to act like a child? Naturally,
There are some advantages to this. They like children more than adults, and babies are very
attractive to people of a motherly disposition. We can say that the infantile traits themselves are
seductive, and that the neurotic need of that human type is one to seduce through infantility —
which implies a need for tenderness, delicacy and fragility, although it also implies self
centeredness and evasion of responsibilities.

In my practice I have had contact with E2 conservation patients. In all cases, they were
women. The reasons why they say they seek psychological help always strike me: in some cases,
when they have problems with their partner, the conflict lies in the fact that the manipulation
they have been exercising no longer works for them, or they have received some ultimatum in
this sense. Thus, there is usually a problem of limits with the couple. This means that they spend
family money haphazardly or in secret, they cannot fulfill agreements, they feel victimized by
their partner without seeing their part in the conflict, etc. They also tend to harbor the feeling that
they always offer more than their partner: more sex, more joy, more time, more dedication...

I have often seen great difficulty in differentiating themselves from the family of origin: they are
patients who expend energy, money and efforts in making the family move and behave as the
patient wishes, with the addition that E2 conservation also often has difficulty setting limits, so
that, in many aspects, the family of origin ends up being more important than the family of
origin. his own family. Added to this is the fact that they cannot let go of control: they need to be
protagonists within the family of origin. As mothers, they have difficulty being adults and
behave like children with their children. There is great difficulty in exercising maternal authority.
I have seen a great identification with children's childhood and wishes that they live a life totally
free of pain and suffering.

E2 must accept constructive challenges that teach him to expose

himself to the adult world, so that he can face the world with the resources he really has, not with
what he promises but never delivers. You need to know how his whims not only don't satisfy
you, but fuel his frustration. He needs to see that being childish guarantees loneliness in his life.
And that, by not making an effort, he becomes paralyzed in his immaturity and, therefore, feels
Useless.

● - being wonderful or getting away with it.

 ● - falling into the compulsion to offer myself at every moment in order to continue being
the favorite.
● - an eternal adolescent
● - I didn't see death or the finitude of my life.
● - treating my family of origin as if it were my property, as if they had to pay homage to
me.
● - intellectual laziness, my ignorance.
● - how inattentive I can be, to identify that I was self-absorbed, that I always acted like a
parasite, feeding on others to feel protected, preferred and consented by them. It has
served me to de-idealize the world in which I have lived, to de-idealize myself before
people, to feel the pain, the disappointment, to face the fall of fantasies...

I see myself as a prisoner of my need to look pretty and nice most of the time: I lived trapped in
my compulsion to be liked by everyone, my compulsion to give gifts without seeing others. I
have also left behind the feeling of being born into the wrong family and a feeling of being a
slave.

Initially a complacent and very affectionate patient who will try to seduce the therapist with his
childish affections and great idealization. This seduction will serve as a lure so that the
psychotherapist does not confront or mistreat him; he will look for the therapist to become
attached and feel difficult for treating him as an adult. Through false tenderness, he will try to
soften the relationship so that they treat each other as two friends, as accomplices: in this way,
his conservation ego will remain intact.

When they have problems with their partner, the conflict lies in the fact that the manipulation
they have been exercising no longer works for them, or they have received some ultimatum in
this sense. Thus, there is usually a problem of limits with the couple. This means that they spend
family money haphazardly or in secret, they cannot fulfill agreements, they feel victimized by
their partner without seeing their part in the conflict, etc. They also tend to harbor the feeling
that they always offer more than their partner: more sex, more joy, more time, more dedication...

I have often seen great difficulty in differentiating themselves from the family of origin: they are
patients who expend energy, money and efforts in making the family move and behave as the
patient wishes, with the addition that E2 conservation also often has difficulty setting limits, so
that, in many aspects, the family of origin ends up being more important than the family of
origin. his own family. Added to this is the fact that they cannot let go of control: they need
to be protagonists within the family of origin. As mothers, they have difficulty being adults
and behave like children with their children. There is great difficulty in exercising maternal
authority. I have seen a great identification with children's childhood and wishes that they live a
life totally free of pain and suffering
E3- Social
Competitive
“Anything goes to stay on Olympus,” Juanjo Herrera will say when analyzing the film “Eva al
desnudo,” In the machinery put to the service of its basic objective: success and social
recognition, this subtype displays the most powerful and unprincipled competitiveness.

The forms that competition takes may be appropriate, but the substance is ruthless. The social
E3, in its self-image as good, hides all the manipulative action aimed at destroying the opponent
through tricks and lies. It is rarely going to be confronted directly; it will always be with more or
less subtle denigrations. Power is exercised from the shadows with a smile and without
disheveled hair, avoiding any space of intimacy. Their efforts are aimed at not losing their good
image and social position, through their social attractiveness and friendliness, rather than good
performance of tasks. All his efforts are focused on maintaining a leading role that allows him to
control the situation.

Envy is one of the silent engines of his action. At work he will go after his ambitions with crude
chameleon tricks and showing his “merchandise” at all times: what he has or with whom he is
related. He will also use his sight to detect the one who has the power, which he will access
through the right silence, the right word, the appropriate action that he imagines may please him.
Once a place of recognition has been achieved, the struggle continues, now seeking constant
adaptation so as not to lose the privileges achieved. He can have no limit here to trample on
anyone, or to build lies that invalidate whoever interferes in his path to the podium. This is one
of the character traits that best evidences his connection to E8, along with revenge.

Vengeful
If he fails to achieve his objective, or is discovered in his fraud or in his true intentions, he tries
to maintain a good image; there will be an opportunity to exact a cold revenge where everything
will be worth it. The manipulation of information, smear and slander are frequently used in this
subtype. The strategic lies to discredit the other are so well concocted that he himself loses the
notion of the limit between reality and fiction.

Histrionic
The social E3 remains unperturbed to not touch or show his anger and pain. His armor is
therefore not to lose the forms or show signs of emotional weakness. So how does he express the
histrionic trait? Well, through impatience, its disguised form of anger. That of not getting what
he wants when he wants: that is what destabilizes his unflappable attitude and draws the veil of
his anger. If he doesn't manage to be the center of attention because his seduction is no longer
worth it, he touches his limit; he does not tolerate this because his fraud is exposed and he is
fired with dramatic and exaggerated outings that show his intolerance.
Chameleonic and Simultaneously multifaceted
We could call the social E3 simultaneously multifaceted. In everyday life he is capable of
watering the plants, talking on the mobile, and taking care of the roast in the oven while he eats
an apple, and thinks about the next thing he has to do.

In his perfect adaptation to the environment, he learns how to be in any situation, how to dress,
what to eat and what to drink, and whether to shut up or speak. From control, it synthesizes what
is most convenient, and passes off as natural behavior studied in detail, away from the slightest
spontaneity.

Inverted masculinity and femininity

The social E3 woman has a lot of masculine energy (logical, rational, and action-oriented). She
has not known how to take from the mother; the tender, receptive energy; she didn't absorb the
loving and protective part of her. She feels complicit among the men, like a colleague who helps
them to be even more men. She admires strong guys and feels like a warrior with a hard shell to
protect herself from everyone and everything.

The social E3 man does not learn to use the energy of the father, whom he looks at with fear,
hiding his emotions. He has a more feminine appearance. And afraid of the strength of him; to
make up for it he fantasizes himself as some kind of uptight guy. Among his friends he will seek
out the strong and mighty.

Both men and women suffer from dystonia: they associate force with violence, as with an out-of-
control explosion. It is healthy for both to experience the strength of the masculine and the
feminine in a group; allowing themselves to enter a space that is neither seductive nor
competitive.

Manipulative when giving and receiving

The social E3 hates to feel indebted, so they feel that they must give more than they receive. It
cannot even give to the same extent; he has to give more and, if he can, better. To make sure he's
going to receive, he hits a commodity exchange where he has to come out on top. It is not about
altruism, compassion or generosity; it is a strictly commercial counterpart.

Appropriationist
The social E3 only moves on safe ground, based on what others have done. Analyze, filter,
optimize, and generate a new product with no room for inspiration. He does not trust being able
to create for himself, being too ambitious and a controller overly concerned with the judgment of
others. Giusy puts it very well: “metaphorically, the creativity of a social E3 would be cut and
paste.”

Avoidance of the experience of death and Frozen

Faced with death, the social E3 is emotionally blocked. He stops feeling, he freezes with a cold
absence so as not to face the pain and sorrow. This is how Francesco remembers the news of the
attack that father surfed: “We did not know how he was, they did not give details of how the
wounded were. I had a tremendous slump and I was completely frozen.” After cooling down, he
chose anger, manifested outward or inward, rather than grief. He does not allow himself a space
to cry, to loosen up; he is afraid to connect with the body, to feel the heart and overflow with
emotion.

Death means for a social E3 the degradation of the body and the total loss of control. He
associates it with the body becoming unpleasant, with “losing face.” Giusy remembers: “In a
directed fantasy, I always saw myself dead, and I contacted the disgusting part of my body.
Mice, insects, worms ate me; I felt rotten liquids oozing from my body.” Faced with the evidence
of his own fragility, this character panics.

He is afraid of dying alone and of physical pain. The anguish that he perceives with the
experience of death is processed without emotional content, defending himself with the
mechanism of denial. He remains “in the denial of the fact, the first phase of mourning,” says
Eustaquio. He avoids thinking about death from the omnipotent feeling that he will never die;
death is a thing that happens to others. In cases where he has had a constant presence in the
family environment, the feeling of being the bearer of death is generated in the social E3.

Until he loses a loved one, he does not become aware of his own mortality. The proximity of
death, moments of physical danger, tragic news or illnesses prefer to process them rationally and,
rather than break down in pain, they will focus on action. “With cancer I didn't miss a single day
of work,” says Ana. To which Haydée adds: “A few minutes after my father died, I went to the
phone and started making arrangements. My father died at 3:30 in the afternoon, and at six he
was already in a funeral home eighty kilometers from home.”

As an adult, he associates death with an internal non-being, with an interior desert, with a cold,
dry depression. If he allows himself to accompany a loved one in this transit, he experiences a
quality of love that opens his heart, and then he lives a purity in delivery, a transcendental
experience. “At my father's farewell I felt a lot of love, of a quality that is difficult to explain,”
recalls Haydée.

The approach to death can also become something frivolous. The social E3, instead of mourning,
think about what clothes to wear to the funeral. In some cases, the Hoffmann process has served
to mourn all the deaths that had not been mourned at the time.

Attached to money
The social E3 risks, even too much, but it is certain that in the face of economic risk it will know
how to procure the means to maintain its status. He doesn't like to ask but he doesn't give up
anything; try to get others to give you without having to openly ask for them.

He seeks from a young age to be financially independent. He doesn't keep an eye on his bank
account, he doesn't save, and he spends more than he has. It is about spending, not about
investing in things that later give revenue. He is generous with other people's money and more
“greedy” when it comes to his own.

Another way of spending is indulging others with gifts, fine foods, etc., as a way of buying
friendship. It is a question of generosity as a matter of image; “It is frowned upon not to be
generous,” Yolanda clarifies. The social E3 tends to give the couple things that he actually likes
but not necessarily the ortho. They are manipulative gifts: “look what I brought you… and then it
ends up in my room, or is it so that I can wear the perfume that I like.”

If living with austerity is what he takes, he will do it, facing the gallery, but he will have a
Mercedes Benz in a parking lot not far from there. He rubs shoulders with powerful people with
a higher purchasing power than his, and behaves with them as if they were from the same clan, a
prisoner of internal insecurity. Although he does not have it, it seems that he has, because of the
attitude of a rich patrician that he knows how to adopt. A social E3 would have a hard time
obeying the mandate of a new Messiah who came with a “leave everything and follow me.”

Attached to the image of his house

A social E3 can't live anywhere; he looks for wide spaces that he decorates with his own style.
His is a charming house. It is not only the place where he lives but also a showcase to show what
he is and what he has. He enjoys receiving friends or important people who will appreciate the
style that permeates every corner. He takes care of all the details and perfumes a house with
flowers, candles, and incense that oscillates between a certain chaos and immaculate cleanliness.

Scatologically modest
This is a topic that a social E3 would prefer not to talk about. He is neat in his personal
cleanliness, in some cases to the point of generating a reaction formation that leads him to wash
himself several times a day. He would eliminate fart, snot, poo and pee, as it seems to him
something very unpleasant that educated people do not show in public. Equipped with a
discriminating sense of smell, he hates bad body odors.

He is usually constipated by a masochistic fixation that leads him to contain. He is able to get on
with the task at hand rather than satisfy physiological needs. He keeps farting to himself, which
is allowed only in an isolated bathroom, away from other ears, but if the evidence betrays it, he
justifies it as “uncontrolled gas,” and if the fart is not his he suffers thinking that someone may
suspect that it comes from him. When he is away from home he finds it difficult to defecate.
Seductive
The social E3 is little passionate, little sexually active; sexuality puts him at the service of
pleasing, until he is sure of being loved. It matters more to him to feel that the other likes him
than the experience of sexuality itself. And he is more interested in seduction than deepening
relationships. He has sex thinking about what the other likes, more than his own pleasure. Being
a good lover becomes one more task, and sex another product for sale. In the love encounter,
before the orgasm, he feels fear of losing control, an interference that makes it difficult for him
to give himself deeply in love.

If he connects with the instinctive part, he likes aggressive sex, which he filters as something
dirty that he has to hide: he prefers a lover with whom he can unleash his beast and maintains a
less exciting relationship with his partner.

Among men, problems of impotence, premature ejaculation, lack of desire, and pain in the penis
may arise; and among women there is a tendency to frigidity.

Studied
The social E3 dresses himself giving meaning and attributes to clothing, which he turns into an
instrument for his social movements. He dresses to please, he is striking in his appearance, and
daring in his shapes and colors. He has his own style, studied in detail so that he never goes
unnoticed. Casual clothing and brands coexist in his wardrobe, and we can find everything from
garments to go to the African jungle to the most elegant attire for a palatial dinner. He has the
poise to show off his wardrobe and although the clothes are cheap they look expensive, because
of the way he wears them.

Cheater and Liar

He turns his traps into a strategy; they do not eat away at his conscience. As Francesco explains:
“I start studying a couple of days before the exam, and I tell myself that I am so good that I will
pass without doing elbows. And I approve.” He builds traps to get what he wants from others,
selling his merchandise as if he were really interested in the other's needs, or with strategic
flattery.

He invents himself just as he invents stories, characters or events that can embellish his image or
be useful in his social climb. And he uses lies to defend himself wherever he finds someone who
can unmask him. The identification with his or her mask is so global that the lie itself can be part
of a character that does not differ in any way from the person.

Professionally independent
He tries to avoid bosses and strict schedules. For the social E3 it is very important to have
freedom and, in the event that there is a boss, he tries to maintain his independence by seducing
the authority: he already “sneaks in,” he measures his actions to gain spaces of power that give
him certain privileges and, if he can, the boss will end up becoming a friend.

Repressed fear, embarrassment, and violence

The social E3 denies fear, it skips it with action. “In my childhood and youth I was very afraid,
and out of shame I masked it with counterphobic attitudes,” recalls Ana.

When he brings out his rage, he truly uses a precise and lethal scalpel. He lives with the feeling
that there is in him a murderous instinct so great that, if he left it free, it would turn him into a
criminal. “I feel so dark inside that I think he could kill; that's why I repress myself,” confesses
Francesco. “When I feel an attack,” Haydée adds, “the first thing that comes out of me is total
hatred and the desire to kill.” Giusy comments that at times she has felt diabolical and Yolanda
says that, in her case, “rather than being aggressive as a first initiative, I am reactive, and I also
tend to direct aggression towards myself. I am afraid of suicide.”

Internal laziness
A working social E3 forgets about its basic needs. He postpones eating, sleeping, or going to the
bathroom, in order to finish what he is up to. Despite spending all day doing things, he feels lazy.

Eustaquio adds a nuance to this paradox: “We are trustworthy, hardworking, but outward, in
outward tasks. But we do not take care of ourselves in the things that do us good for ourselves.”
Ana agrees: “If you save it for your leisure, since leisure time never comes without homework,
you don't do it.”

Laziness is mixed with a lack of discipline; It is difficult for him to maintain a commitment to
himself, especially if it is something that belongs to the care of his spirit. The spirit is not
something concrete, it is not seen, so he does not trust that it has a value. As forcefully as he is
determined and striving in egoic actions, he neglects to remember the subtlest and deepest parts
of himself.

This character becomes an expert in giving recommendations that he himself does not carry out,
unless they are imposed as a task.

Interested friend
The social E3 knows a lot of people but has few friends. He tends to choose his friends from
among the sexes he is attracted to, and his relationships are never disinterested. He has difficulty
being with someone who is simply a friend, because deep down there is a mercantilist interest: if
the other has money, power, prestige, wisdom, beauty... then he wants to have him as a friend.
Look in friends for something that you can not only value but also use. He does not know how to
go towards the other from the heart, he feels unarmed and vulnerable. “If you're going to
introduce me to the President of the Republic,” admits Francesco, “it doesn't take me five
minutes to show up. On the other hand, if you tell me: “go make friends,” then I am very afraid
and in tremendous anguish.”

By masking emotions, he can be envious and manipulative without being noticed. He can convey
superiority in a veiled way when he is apparently extolling others. He expects the other to
recognize and value him, and rarely breaks this automatic mechanism, and simply lets himself be
and enjoy the friendship. He validates his prestige in terms of the other.

In relationships, he feels faithful even after being unfaithful. It is justified because she spends
most of her time unconsciously seducing you, infidelity. He breaks off a relationship from one
day to the next because, up to that moment, he has maintained the impression that nothing was
happening on the outside. He avoids confrontations and prefers to send his lawyer before putting
on a show.

Envious
He envies the possession of objects but hardly something that he lacks inside, such is his internal
disconnection that he only goes for the external. “Today,” says Francesco, “it is different for me:
I see other good therapists and I would like to manage the therapeutic relationship as they do.
But this is recent. Before, I wanted objects, things, and that didn't satisfy me: I bought them and
felt just as empty. It was a fixation, it became something obsessive.”

Jealous
Jealousy is aroused especially if he senses a rival. Which might seem normal, but it is that the
social E3 deeply neglects his partner, from the lack of intimacy, stops looking at them, until
someone who can threaten their place does not appear. Live the third in discord as someone who
is worth more, or who is more beautiful, or who has something of great value, so not only is his
love relationship at risk, but he can lose his power, his status, his importance, his prestige. The
presence of a rival brings with it the monster of social failure.

Ambitious
His effort in social climbing and making a career is different from the ambition of the social E2.
Both plan strategies and seduce people who can take them to a recognized place, but the E2 sells
itself as great and expresses its generosity with great warmth, while the E3 sells its work or its
organizational efficiency and, above all, its efforts, with a feeling of insecurity within himself.
Play more at being useful and carefully study what you need to make multiple profits, but you
always have to be correct and adequate.

Cold
Emotional coldness obviously has to do with disconnection from your affective world. She
doesn't know what she feels and for him, feelings are more like obstacles that get in his way,
instead of guides to choose what she wants and what she has to do. Similarly, although he can be
empathic, he does not take into account the other's emotions, which are not on his map. People
are objectified, accounting notes that he keeps between what he receives and what he gives. It's
no wonder that in intensely painful situations he can appear unperturbed; he never loses the
mask.

Impatient
Time for social E3 is the time you have to do your things or wait to achieve what you want.
More than a time to live is a useful time. And it had better be quick, for it cannot tolerate a
vacuum or inactivity. It is about a character pushed into the future (of his successes), a fantasized
future or that he has to realize at full speed. Experiencing the here and now would mean for the
social E3 to flow with life, to enjoy himself, but he has neither the confidence nor the hope that
this will be enough to live on.

For the distinctive passion of E3 social, Ichazo proposed the term prestige: we can say that the
three social is people who have the passion to shine — not only through work, but also in the
way they present themselves to others. It is as if he had an intrapsychic propaganda department.
By bringing the desire for prestige, understood as a passion for social recognition, to a need for
applause from everyone and not just from a few, it consumes excessive energy that naturally
interferes with spontaneous action.

None of the E3 subtypes are described in the DSM-IV, which surely reflects the fact that the
corresponding traits, oriented towards good performance, practicality, and success, are idealized
by modern culture, in which it can be say that the social three, in particular, has become the
modal personality of the secular and technocratic world.

Social E3 is the most chameleonic of the subtypes of the three. He is also the most vain of the
vain. Regarding the other E3, he is a strong and reactive character, lover of power, even if he
manages it not directly, but through the people he supports.

The original scene, at least the one in which one remembers how the trait was fixed, that moment
in which the anguish of the abandoned child finds a way out, in the social enneatype three is
marked by the experience of the gaze: a look that returns us to a lost paradise, to a well-being,
but that, from that moment on, it falsifies us forever. I had to find something to show, something
that would give me a place, something that would satisfy my parents, so that I would receive a
kind of support in the form of a look, not because of who I was, but because of what I showed.
Some testimonies express it very clearly:
―Look how smart my girl is, but she already reads and she's only three years old!‘ they
told me. And I, clutching Mom's skirt, without an arm to take me, turned into her cloth of tears,
and I said, ‗Come on, Mom, don't cry.‘‖

―‘But you can't imagine how well my little girl folds her clothes,‘ my mother told me.‖
―When I was five or six years old they asked me: ‗And you, my girl, what are you going
to be when you grow up?‘ We lived in a humble house, and I went around in my little red dress
on the Ferris wheel in the park, and everything turned and turned in a litany around the iron. And
I came to answer: ‗I'm going to have money to fix this house and make it beautiful, and have a
refrigerator! When I grow up I'm going to be successful!‘ And there, when I felt that it would be
so, I stayed calm‖.

―I was taught as a child as I was a trophy: ‗But how beautiful my child is, he is blond,
handsome as a little angel‘‖

Before starting the conscious process of transformation, the three social ones have our
eyes set on obtaining social success; this is our engine, the search for a prestigious social
position in the environment where we move, where we can shine and be admired and where we
I almost always get it. We easily create a network of people whose basic function is to be
admired
by friends, teachers, bosses, students, patients…

We want to be the center of attention and the gaze of those we admire, and we deploy all
our capacities of seduction to achieve it, which vary depending on the different assessments that
biographically have been reinforced. For some it is about showing intelligence, culture, class; we
show how much we know and what university careers we have. Others show the material
symbols of social status: having a nice house, a car that snatches the look, clothes, watches, etc.
Others, the body and the face, being cute, knowing how to dance…

With all this deployment we get a look of recognition, but not to us, but to that figure that
We have sustained for so many years with effort and with a great feeling of emptiness. We know
how to sell and attract attention with a clear adaptation to the environment in which we are. But
inside we do not find ourselves: in the midst of so many roles that we represent, we do not know
what we feel or who we are.

―I was not authentic: what I thought were my feelings, my emotions, were not real, and I
I wanted to be authentic but I could not. I wanted to tell the truth and I didn't know what my truth
was. This is very exasperating, asking myself what I feel, and not knowing, or what I think, what
I want, and seeing that I don't know either. This, in contrast to a personality in which I appear
very structured, apparently very clear, in which I do know what I want, I do it and I impose it.
For many years I have believed that I always knew what I wanted: this was my delusion.‖
The adaptation to each medium cartons us, cools us and freezes us. However, we believe
We are always fine. Simply, we function in the world and we function well, effectively,
impatiently, responsibly, competitively, without knowing what is happening inside.
To fill the void we reinforce our blindness in doing: we always try to be busy, refusing to
stop so as not to become aware of how lost we are. We can become machines of work and
production, with a demanding and sometimes authoritarian mood, but dressed in sympathy and
good humor, where the other is not a person but an instrument of our goal. As Montaigne points
out, we don't usually do anything for someone, whom we only do something to while we're
doing something else.

When we gain admiration at work, we expand:

―As more people approve of me and applaud me, the more I expand, the more I dominate
and the more I control. Here our madness is manifested: we seek to feel supported by people
through admiration and applause. Admiration is the base that sustains us and distances us from
the experience of that little boy or girl who feels sad, alone, and abandoned. The feared scene is
to be worthless, to have no money, to be poor or not to be successful in our profession. That
scene puts us in contact with abandonment and pain.‖

―Therefore, we can sink before the possibility of feeling questioned. The reaction is to
freeze and wait. What hurts is not shown: it is charged coldly with distance and disinterest,
through a sibylline revenge, without any awareness of pain.‖

E3 - Sexual
Dependent on the other's gaze
The sexual E3 lives daily with the idea of having a camera always watching him. He becomes an
actor and practices the movements he captures while carefully observing the context or the one
he wants to seduce or find interesting. He then deludes himself into believing that these gestures
are natural.

This ability was developed above all in the primary relationship, when the mother's look at their
emotional world was missing and they learned that what they valued was the surface, that is, the
confirmation of their narcissistic expectations. The lack of real support, of having been truly
looked at by their mother, becomes, as an adult, the pathological need to see oneself in the other's
gaze. That other who values this perfect surface and thus gives it the illusion of recognition that
allows it to exist. The look of the other momentarily helps to cover the emptiness, the sadness,
the fear, the anguish, and the loneliness.

Since the sexual instinct is affected, that of the other must be a look in love, sexually enchanted;
hence, the person of this character expects the other to confirm that he is valuable through
desiring them.

Sweet and Maternal

Super attentive to what the other wants, the sexual E3 tends to take care of them, she likes to
give and please, and create a mothering environment where she feels useful and safe. Her
attitude is very tender and sweet. It is the most subordinate of the three subtypes.
She has a passion for family. If one of your dreams is the ideal love, the other is the perfect
family. One of the situations that allows this role the most is being a mother and a housewife;
there the sexual E3 feels like a fish in water and anything can subordinate it. Being a mother and
a wife is a fundamental value in her life; even if she is not satisfied it is difficult for her to leave
this role. In this place she feels safe, she knows how to function, she is practical and efficient as a
housewife; cooking, caring, and solving.

It is about a person who apparently does not ask but seeks to give care and, however, has a great
need for contact, tenderness, to feel loved, and protected. There is a great longing for intimacy
and by giving it, she hopes to receive it in return, but she does not ask for it and, when she is
saturated, she complains or gets angry. They are hypersensitive to rejection and can come off as
a demanding boy or girl when they feel fragile or don't get what they want in return for their
compliance. It is as if the mothering that has been lacking has been resolved by identifying with
a maternal role that does take care of the specific needs of the other, and connected with sweet
and loving seduction.

There is a healthy order and a sick order, and it is a natural part of life for the mother to meet the
needs of the child. In this case, the order is affected and reversed. The mother, and sometimes the
father, is the one who was cared for by the son or daughter. These adults were valued as children
based on being attentive to their father or mother, or solving things in the family with their
siblings or at home. Being sweet, accommodating and motherly seems to them to ensure a place
of affection.

Accommodating
Complacency is a lie for the other. The sexual E3 seems to please and not ask, but his asking is
subterranean, and repressed aggression will come out passively if he doesn't feel reciprocated. It
is available to ensure dependence on the other and thus not enter into solitude. The thirst for love
that feels calm with dependency and codependency in relationships. On the one hand, he believes
that he will be loved through pleasing, but it is about servility, a false kindness and, as he also
knows this, he never truly trusts that he is loved, he thinks that the love he receives is also false.

He has so much energy put into pleasing that he loses touch with what he really wants. What the
couple wants is what he knows how to detect, to the point that he confuses it with his own need
for it. And since he usually does what the other wants, he wishes for them. There is also an
awareness of the effort that goes into pleasing, and here it differs from the sexual E9, which loses
connection with itself to the point of physical desensitization to its efforts. The sexual E3
conforms and adapts, yes, but in the expectation that the other validates his “great work”.

Ambiguous in sexuality
Especially the sexual E3 woman seeks to attract and please, and when the gold comes she gets
scared and doesn't know what to do. She fits the phrase “Look at me but don't touch me” very
well. By feeling seen and desired, she already feels valued, and sometimes that is enough. She
can activate the taunt mechanism for you to chase after her. She sells sex looking for protection
and a tenderness that she sexualizes, that she substitutes for sex. Sexuality is based on the
pleasure of the other and is used as a performance. It is a combination of erotic excitement and
shy girl.

He tends to frigidity since, by using sexuality as an attention to the other, he does not have room
to enjoy himself, it costs him spontaneity. There is repression of eroticism, rigidity, and lack of
play and expression of their needs. It seduces from the erotic, while disconnected from the erotic.
Sexual desire is transformed into a “you love me.”

The great attention he pays to the body is not to feel better but to look better, as a fundamental
part of his image. However, it is not identified with his body but is dissociated from it. The
sexual E3’s body is something he exercises control over and uses for the benefit of his image; it
is not strange that it is difficult for him to let go until orgasm. There is a disconnect between the
genital and the emotional.

The sexual E3 woman can really like very macho men even if they treat her badly. It is easy to
find sexual E3 women partners with E8 men. She provokes, resists, submits... Being treated with
force or violence makes her feel alive, and sometimes she provokes aggression. She can go from
a violent man who scares her to a tender and sensitive one, whom she later dismisses as weak
and finds boring.

He uses sexuality to get closer, fix problems, and please... He can get abused in order to avoid
conflict or rejection. He splits his emotions and can panic so much that he gives in and endures a
lot, but when he feels overwhelmed he can react with destructive fury. He can get into a circuit
of pleasing-feeling abused-getting angry-exploiting-feeling guilty and back again to submit and
please. He can only break it by becoming aware of what it causes and taking responsibility for it,
by allowing himself to enter the void and desolation, by letting go of the objects he holds on to
so as not to see himself.

In the absence of feelings and in order not to touch the void, the sexual E3 spends his life in
search of sensations. He gets into conflictive relationships and he likes the danger, which is to
feel alive in some way. Look for the intensity to feel and to avoid sadness, boredom, and
dissatisfaction.

The sexual E3 man can present himself as someone very confident and aggressive, although deep
down he feels insecure.
Undervalued
The sexual E3 has depressive tendencies. He is sadder and feels less valuable than the other two
subtypes, and he tries to compensate with image and charm, with a smile and loving expression,
being nice or pleasant. It is as if he had to pay to exist, as if he did not deserve it; he feels guilty
for existing, and many times, like a burden to the family. So try not to give trouble, help, and not
bother the other.

When the sexual E3 collapses, it looks at itself and does not have the necessary ego structure to
sustain itself; it can then go into despair and self-destruction. He cannot deal with the truth that
his life is a failure and that everything is an illusion. He needs personal work to be able to
connect with something bigger and trust. To value himself just for being, since he lives as
unworthy. When he regains more freedom to go after what he wants, he is no longer so eager to
be loved; the instinct returns, as if to say: “you take an interest in me, because now I can't take an
interest in you.”

There is a background of sadness and the person is perceived as fragile. He feels a constant
internal loneliness, from which he tries to escape by seeking links, especially with the opposite
sex, that give him narcissistic food but not real nutrition in the face of his loneliness. Very low
self-esteem, as it comes from childhood, will hardly be cured with a partner.

As a child he learned to keep his emotions, to cry alone, and to solve himself; to endure. Not
feeling entitled to express what feel makes him feel that he is worthless and hopeless. As if he
didn't deserve or as if he owed something to the world. The feeling is having to give without
receiving.

He learned to constantly devalue and compare himself.

He idealizes the other: the friend, the teacher and, above all, the partner; he cannot live without
putting them on a pedestal. It is difficult for him to realize this enormous idealization, because it
is the most common thing in the world to blind himself to the other's defects and see only his
bright part: all his virtues look wonderful, worthy of praise and imitation, a desirable north and a
corroboration that perfection exists and can be achieved (surely based on work and effort).

This embellishment of the other camouflages the deep need to be the one who is treated like this.
The sexual E3 idealizes in the hope that they idolize him, of being treated with that aura of
special and uniqueness, that the other also sees only his virtues and praises, and recognizes them.
Such an attitude hides a double deception. First, not recognizing the hunger for love and
unconditional admiration for him. And second, by giving the other a treatment that has nothing
to do with him, he is left confused and on slippery and incomprehensible ground.
The irruption, which the sexual E3 experiences as sudden and treacherous, of the true nature of
the other, can provoke a crisis of great dimensions, a radical denial of all those virtues that he
previously he admired so much, which leads him to run out of the relationship, accusing the
other person of having cheated on him.

He will then turn his head and look for another (friend, teacher, partner...) who will finally meet
his expectations. In this way he avoids the possibility of facing the harsh reality that the
deception had been caused by himself.

Shy and Insecure

It would seem that the sexual E3s are shy people, especially the women, who were, in general,
good and quiet girls, and they remain with that internal feeling of eternal girls. Shyness appears
more before groups or before someone they take for an authority figure.

It is the most insecure of the three subtypes, since the devaluation is more bare. Having valued
the physical image so much, he has fewer internal resources; seems to live in a daze where the
feeling that there is nothing inside is revealed and translates into having nothing to say and going
blank. On contact he gets scared when he begins to feel and withdraws.

In situations with “public” he feels very vulnerable. As he was not seen as a child, when he feels
exposed as an adult he does not know what to do or say. He wishes to remain invisible and at the
same time longs to be the most watched.

Being cold, paralyzed, and not knowing how to act is typical of this subtype. Since he does not
know the proper behavior, he stands still, observing what is the best behavior among those who
are on his record. These are moments that he lives with great suffering and defenselessness,
where he defends himself by not compromising with anything or anyone, and even less with
himself, with what he feels. In this tense wait, he adopts a distant statuesque pose that, due to his
inclination towards beauty, he may adorn with a beautiful smile or kind words, while buying
time to try to find out, prisoner of internal desperation, what is expected of him.

Naïve
The sexual E3 denies both her intuition and sensitivity, which she has experienced as causing
emotional and relationship chaos. He learned to ignore himself and has turned those qualities
into false confidence and sweetness. He is perceptive, but represses his sensations, or disconnects
and seems not to perceive what is there. He denies the internal and external world to maintain a
smile and obtain love, since if he expresses what he perceives, he runs the risk of confronting his
aggression, with the fact that there are some things he does not like, and with the fear of being
rejected for expressing it.
When the sexual E3 is discovering and working on itself, it begins to reconnect with its desire
and pays attention to its intuition; the barrier that prevents him from perceiving the sensations is
diluted and he faces things; until he ended up becoming someone very intuitive and perceptive,
with a great acuity to see what is happening in the other. His hypersensitivity then puts him at the
service of seeing not only what the other needs but also what he feels, and he can be very close,
empathetic, and compassionate.

Chameleon
Being in function of the other: kind, helpful, accommodating, and understanding, apparently
ensures affection and avoids possible rejection. It also maintains the image of that ideal person
that everyone wants. Or it even allows him to go unnoticed, thus avoiding feeling, being
confronted, attacked, questioned, etc. He can rest.

The sexual E3 was educated to be like a dog, which is rewarded for how well it does things, for
how much it obeys. Unconditional like dogs with their masters, he never pouts, never gets angry,
always has a smile, and a waddle that wags his tail as a demonstration of being eternally happy.
One of his worst fears is confrontation.

The sexual subtype was looked at and valued only when he was what the other expected. He was
never rewarded for having his own initiative, much less for being an individual who fights for his
ideals. Expert from very early on in guessing the other, he was running out of internal referents
and with a hollow feeling, against which he has fought fattening more and more the idea that
without models one cannot live.

He was applauded for being pretty and seductive, and comes to feel that he only exists because
he has a body; hence that great fear of deterioration and old age, and that feeling, when he begins
to become aware, of having been a piece of meat that has been used.

Frivolous and Superficial

The sexual E3 trivializes the painful emotions and situations of his life. The surface he stays on
is a permanent childlike state that he uses as a defense against taking responsibility for his life.

Sometimes it is difficult for him to get involved in situations that require his intellect and he
prefers to remain on the surface, which is what is known, his comfort zone, where he feels
accepted, accepted because of his beauty as if it were a beautiful vase. Assuming this role of
man, woman, object, he feels safe; he no longer needs to question himself or turn around to see
who he is, a prospect that terrifies him because he doesn't have much idea of himself either.

Controlled
One of the biggest fears of sexual E3 is losing control and freaking out. It is so much control that
he exerts to maintain his ego ideal that it stiffens his body as well as his mind. Anything out of
his control that could threaten his image terrifies him. As a body defense mechanism, it
maintains a rigid structure that lives like a steel tube that supports the structure of the self. Faced
with situations of chaos in childhood, this structure served the child to feel safe, to feel sustained.

This control extends to many areas, in the illusion of being able to manage everything without
making oneself vulnerable. This is how the sexual E3 prevents itself from truly giving itself in its
relationships. Getting to satisfy the needs of the other is a strategy to not be in oneself, where
nothing worthy of being valued or loved appears.

Self-control blocks the ability to recognize the basic needs and desires, being more important
than those of the parents, and more important to maintain the false image constructed. This
learned way of controlling the body's threatening impulses gives it back a power over itself.

In this sense, we can interpret the multiple eating disorders in this subtype as an attempt to mold
not only a perfect body, according to an idealized image of fashion, but also to control their
emotions and sexual impulses, preventing them from giving themselves over to pleasure.

We could interpret anorexia in sexual E3 women as a way of saying “No” with her body, since
she lacks the voice that says “No” to (emotional and sexual) abuse, dependence, and the
plasticization and castration of their feminine energy, in our culture. Thus, through control over
his body, he expresses “I don't want, I don't receive you,” depriving himself of nutrition or
vomiting what is nutritious, and at the same time he sends the message: “give me, I need,”
because he cannot be nourished by his own energy. In this way the daughter can maintain control
over her physical and psychic space, and at the same time a power over the mother, which
requires her to respond to her expectations with a silent “No” capable of reaching death.

It is also about controlling the other. Just as the mother controlled him so that he would be the
son who could correspond exactly to her ideal image, the son learns to control the mother: he not
only perceives her desires and needs, but also controls her movements and actions to be prepared
for any threat or act preventively. This control also fulfills the purpose of not feeling the fear
behind it, and from which many misinterpretations of the motivations of the other, jealousy,
envy, and competition derive.

Cold, Hard, and Numb

The person of this character can be perceived as cold due to their emotional repression. Although
one of the most repressed feelings at E3 is fear, the sexual subtype is the one most in contact
with it, as well as the most sensitive and vulnerable. One of his biggest fears is conflict.

Many times he avoids being in life, since in life there is conflict. He may look like a plastic doll.
He fears that if he assumes that there is a conflict with someone or in some area of his life,
everything he has built will come crashing down. As if the scaffolding supporting the fantasy
that “everything is fine” was so fragile that if something moves, the castle collapses.

Aggression is seen by the sexual E3 as something catastrophic, which represses even at the cost
of enduring being attacked. Many times they do not perceive the aggression of the other as such,
or they deceive themselves by saying that it is not a violent situation at all. Sometimes it is
difficult for him to differentiate between what is real and what is not. As if he doesn't believe
what he's seeing.

It has a great capacity for both alertness and calm in extreme situations, such as accidents or
strong aggression, due to its excess of control and coldness. Many times, having lived through
unsustainable situations in childhood led him to this cooling down in order to survive and
distance himself from pain. He splits from his emotions by looking at his life as a moviegoer.

Perfectionist
The sexual E3 puts perfectionism mainly in the physical aspect. Motivation is to attract, be
admired, and desired; that's how it feels. With perfection put into the image, she is afraid of
getting old, losing her beauty. Make up your external image and also the internal one; she
presents herself as the ideal mother, the unconditional friend, the perfect partner. If she feels bad
inside, she makes some physical arrangements to hide her emotions. She spends time and money
on clothes, makeup, and whatever makes her look good. A certain exhibitionism masks shame,
insecurity, and fear.

Much of his perfectionism has to do with fear of failure. Failing is one of the most feared ghosts.
Doing it wrong is threatening. Sometimes it is easier for him to give up doing something than to
risk making a mistake. It is difficult for him to recognize mistakes or admit that someone points
them out to him, as if such a blemish would not fit in his image of perfection. And it is painful
for him to connect with failure from the fear of recognizing falsehood, that this created world is
not perfect.

The sexual E3 defends its image. To maintain it, he can protect others by justifying what is
necessary: make up his childhood with supposedly wonderful parents. Or make up the couple's
relationship, justifying even aggression. If he exposes the other, he brings to light the evil and,
with this, his own ugliness. It does not support chaos or the rupture of the image that has been
built because it collapses.

Critical and Demanding

Achieving such an image requires a lot of self-demand. There is also a demand for others, as if
he couldn't stand it if things weren't perfect. It is something that does not show with the naked
eye: it is what lies behind the mask. He strives to maintain a world in harmony because anything
that is not right causes him anguish.
Outside the intimate relationship, it is difficult for him to formulate an open and direct criticism,
which is expressed more with gossip or remains unexpressed. Behind the criticism there is often
an envy that is not allowed to feel and that is connected to their low self-esteem. Recognizing the
value of the other is difficult for him because it threatens his own image and value.

Efficient
Part of their strategy is efficiency. Although the sexual E3 is not as efficient as the conservation
subtype, it can achieve what it sets out to do if its relationship with the other depends on it.
Efficiency is based on the image that it will give to that person who is important in your life.

Being, like perfectionism, at the service of the dual and sentimental relationship, it is not an
efficiency that is worth it to fulfill tasks that help him feel the value of himself, nor is it useful to
achieve professional success, as in the cases of the social or conservation E3. The efficiency of
the sexual E3 is aimed at maintaining the superficial idealized image of the perfect woman or
man to love.

Competitive and Envious

The sexual E3 is competitive if he sees that he has rivals who can take away a place of affection.
Especially in love relationships, he can be very jealous and envious, although he does not openly
show it: it is a veiled competition, with strategies. Try to be the prettiest, the kindest and most
helpful, and act as if it comes naturally to you, without looking that many times it is to win a
competition for the affection of a loved one.

Feeling of little value, he compares himself and does not feel capable, although he longs to be
like that other he admires and envies. He looks outside, as if there weren't something inside him
that supports him, that anchors him, that centers him. And there is a lot of competition with
people of the same sex.

Repressed aggression and rage

As in all people of the E3 character, rage is denied and repressed. He has not been able to feel it
in his childhood out of respect for the demands of controlling parents who expected from him the
adorable, educated, and perfect child. Expressing it would have meant manifesting an inner
world of its own, a whole taboo, either due to lack of listening or to respond to the ideal of the
perfect family that cannot be questioned.

That is why the sexual E3 projects aggression onto others, provoking being attacked in order to
accuse the aggressor, without taking responsibility for his own. He can repress his rage to the
point where he does not feel it, although when it finally comes out, he can do it in a hysterical
and overwhelming way. The hysterical outbreak of rage is the only form that is allowed, since he
experiences it as if it were out of his control and, therefore, he does not have to assume his
responsibility.

Another form in which anger is displaced are panic attacks, very common among sexual E3s,
and which are often ways of expressing their suffering and fear, and a paradoxical way of
expressing discomfort within the relationship. Paradoxical because while trying to express
“something” that happens to be taken into account, these attacks produce a worsening of their
invalidity and insecurity, and increase the level of their dependence on the other.

Psychosomatic
The function of a bodily symptom is to manifest what is not conscious. The disconnection of the
sexual E3 with his body, and his denial of emotions, makes them appear as symptoms. It is as if
the body shouted what the person does not want to see or assume.

There are serious problems in the area of expression, such as in the throat, or tension in the jaw
due to the difficulty of expressing anger. Also skin rashes, which usually show the discontent of
being in contact with something or someone; colitis or intestinal problems. The problem of
managing emotions manifests itself as not being able to digest well. No matter how much the
body talks, things continue to seem fine to the sexual E3 until they don't have more serious crises
or breakouts; especially couple conflicts.

Disconnected
This character uses dissociation and denial to prevent dangerous emotions from erupting, so he
learns to disconnect easily. He disconnects from reality and lives in an ideal world. This makes
him, in his relationships, insensitive to his own and others' feelings.

Anxious
Anxiety appears before the fear that emotions will overflow. He is more of a hysterical threat
than a narcissistic one. The sexual subtype may also feel guilt; they fear mistakes, they accuse
themselves as long as there is no conflict: a lot of anxiety is triggered by the possibility that
someone, especially the couple, gets angry.

Proud and Arrogant

The sexual E3 got used to doing it alone and not asking. Many times the woman competes with
her mother, as a consequence of the “privileged” link established with her father; and she, at the
same time, can assume the function of her mother's mother, responding to her need for care and
thus taking on a role that she does not correspond to. Although she feels the need for her, the
arrogant man allows her to put herself in the daughter's place and ask.

Asking also stains the image of perfection that you want to give to the world. Asking means that
there is something missing or bothersome; this is how he lived it in his family. A threat not only
to his self-delusion of being perfect, but also to the relationship with the other, who has built
himself on the deception of being the ideal person who has promised love and eternal happiness.

For the passion of the sexual three, Ichazo used the words masculinity or femininity, depending
on the case. Rather, I used to explain it as an excessive attempt to conform to cultural (perhaps
Hollywood) images of masculine and feminine. Today it seems to me that the fundamental
pathology of these people lies in the fact that, instead of acting from an instinctive freedom, they
put all their passion in the thirst for love and in the corresponding seduction through
complacency or the image that is supposedly attractive and exciting. The result of this is that the
woman, being too aware of pleasing the man, loses the ability to enjoy her. Also added to this
character is a certain passion for the family that, despite not appearing as a defect, embodies an
exaggerated need to please that perpetuates self-alienation.

Of the three subtypes, sexual is the most dependent. He does not usually show aggressiveness
and does not tolerate being rejected. His seduction is intended to be welcomed and confirmed,
confusing the value of himself with the attractiveness of his body

● - being imprisoned by the beautiful physical image

● - he considers to be shameful or that makes him lose control: painful io, anger, sadness,
jealousy, envy, resentment
● - dependence on the look of approval and love of others, especially the couple, resulting
from the lack of love for oneself
● - compulsion to get everything under control and to be loved
● - need for the gaze and recognition of the man, related to the fact that she lived some kind
of absence of father; for men, it would also be a question of the need for a woman's gaze;
a childish and narcissistic need that seeks constant applause and that leaves him
increasingly empty, because his love relationships are based on making the other applaud
him
● - self-deception and falsehood in love relationships.
● - the underlying narcissism supposes a frivolity and a falsehood with love
● - feel a sadness that has always been there. What happens is that, by not expressing it and
being constantly worried about not showing it, he does not even show it to himself
● - self-deception that goes hand in hand with what you tell yourself not to confront
● - maybe unable to contact one's own needs to identify what you want and what you do
not want from the other, putting the limits that are needed to not feel used, a sensation
that sexual E3 usually feels very often.
● - need to have power in affective relationships.
● - a fear of ceasing to be helpful or of seducing or conquering, or of trying to be the best
lover or the best wife—which is tantamount to selling oneself to the gaze of others.
● - falling in love or loving compulsively, as an alienation that saves me from facing the
day to day, the boredom, the emptiness, the nonsense in which I sometimes feel trapped.
He has had a hard life. I say think because maybe you have been disconnected from your
personal tragedy until you tell something about your life or your childhood and someone gives
you back the tragedy of the experience.

Disconnection can cause the sexual three to usually suffer, and also because to show the need is
to drop a part of the mask and teach something that is considered very ugly and that has been
very forbidden. Perhaps a very fragile and sad person may feel, but he does not show it, or
beautify it to use it as a weapon of seduction.

For the sexual three, a separation is his worst nightmare: it is better to die than to separate, he
seems to think, or imagines that it is the closest thing to death. In the face of a separation, you
may even experience thoughts of suicide and start using drugs to drown out the suffering. He is
very afraid of pain and, when he enters it, the feeling is that he will never leave, no matter how
many times he has entered and left before. You can also leave therapy quickly when another love
appears, as you often chain one with another so as not to live the pain of separation and it is
amazing how you can quickly disconnect from the previous love.

The sexual E3 feels and lives in a permanent prison. He lives drowned by vanity, and this
drowning leads him to want to go unnoticed and to be hyperthymized for fear of saying or doing
the wrong thing. The need to free yourself from this is what can also motivate you to do therapy
when you are more aware of yourself.

Dependence on love and self-deception with love. Gone is the thirst to love and be loved, and the
frivolity associated with seeking and conquering this type of relationship. Putting all the energy
into seduction or conquest and pleasing the other. The dependence on recognition and applause
in the couple.

When you let go of perfection, something more human and sincere appears, but that something is
terrifying, because it means dropping the mask. And behind that fall there is the feeling that there
is nothing, just a huge fragility of someone who deep down needs a lot of love.

―I have confused love with the demand to put up with everything. If I love my partner, I endure
her, and through endurance I receive her love.

I felt so desperate for my husband's sexual and emotional rejection that my conclusion was: that
he doesn't like my body anymore is equal to that he doesn't like me. She was willing to do
anything to get his love (I would have thrown myself on the tracks if he had asked me) and, in
the most complete disconnection, from impulsiveness, I went to a plastic surgeon to have a
reconstruction of my chest. He was at the peak of my neurosis, of the madness of vanity, where
being is confused with the body and receiving and giving love, with the image. I was convinced
that I was going to get her love through being sexy again!

My confidence has always depended on men. I have not known true confidence in myself, just a
mirage in which at times I could feel like a super woman. If a man I was interested in or loved
loved or cared about me, then I was someone valuable, worthwhile. Thus, I could take care of
myself and believe that he felt a real interest in me. If that person lost interest in me, the
cataclysm occurred in which the farce of self-confidence surfaced and I could realize that he felt
towards me nothing but hatred and contempt for not being able to get or keep love.

Difficulty in recognizing what I felt, what I wanted or what my needs were. I had a lot of
difficulty believing in my sensations, in my intuition, because it was always denied. It's as if I
had to feel what my parents wanted; hence I felt a lot of confusion in knowing what my truth is. I
was repressing the pleasure and the spontaneous. I easily and adequately disconnected from
feeling, since I thought that this would give complications to others and I should not disturb
them. I stopped validating what I felt and started hiding what I thought was not good. I had
difficulty seeing the shadow of things, people and myself, or to see the abuse, the dark side of
things. I didn't see my fears.

I felt insecure inside but on the outside I showed security. Now I can see how much energy I
spend maintaining an image, not showing my insecurity, covering what I don't want them to see,
being nice. I was and am very afraid of being ridiculous, afraid of disappointing. Therefore, I feel
a great need to control. It's like putting on makeup or fixing what I don't like, which makes me
ashamed of myself. Later, I believe it and self-deception comes. I no longer know what is real
and what is not. Now I can see this very clearly and be aware of the moment I put this
mechanism into action. I can show myself more vulnerable and afraid or insecure, and on the
other hand I also have a greater contact with my fear.

If I was with a man in a good relationship, I felt safe and at peace. I had a great need for affection
and at the same time I was very eroticized, so I assimilated affection with erotic love without
realizing it.

I think there is more honesty and less self-delusion in me, although many times I find myself not
knowing what is real and what is not.

In many cases, the three sexual ones have been abandoned, crushed, used, abused, mistreated,
beaten and raped children.

We were taught to be objects and our loved ones used us according to their needs. They didn't
know how to love us for who we were but for what we did. We become our parents' caregivers.
We were never taught the difference between good and evil and we learned to disconnect from
the painful, beautifying it so as not to betray our abusers.

We confused abuse with love and learned to take responsibility for their actions and transform
them into good beings idealizing them to keep their image intact, and thus ours.

This left us with a very low self-esteem and without any love for ourselves, since we believed we
were worthy of everything that happened to us and we assumed the blame by putting on a good
face, looking sweet, being complacent and hiding our strength.

With perfection, we obtained instances in which we felt loved and adored above all by ourselves.
In love with love and being adored, we have vampirized our lovers and partners, drowning them
with our narcissistic love and demanding attention impossible to fulfill, selling perfection to be
loved and demanding that same perfection in return.

We have lived a good part of our lives choosing partners who despised or mistreated us to
confirm that lack of worth that we felt deeply, enduring unsustainable situations that ended in
sweet reconciliations. When we endured the abuse again, we returned to buy at any price the
stage of the conquest where we were adored and protagonists of the gaze of the other. That's why
it was worth it. We continued to protect our original abusers and repeatedly put up with it all out
of love.

Vanity consisted in thinking that our false love was going to be able to transform the monster
into a prince.

Vanity and arrogance in wanting to put ourselves above those who mistreated us to keep intact
our image of kindness, generosity and cleanliness, depriving them of their responsibility.

E3- Self-Preservation
To be the best and To be useful
A childhood environment between deception and seduction can be the origin of the base of
mistrust and the feeling of being in danger of this subtype. The record of childhood would be a
“they tell him: I’ll give you, but they don't give him anything”; a mere flattery with a promise
was included, with which the child cannot trust who cares for him.

Hence the great capacity of the conservation E3 to: guess the “needs” of the other, to be at his
service, to do what is thick for him.

Children who live in a dangerous environment try to protect themselves, and the conservation E3
usually does is avoid drawing attention to himself, remaining frozen and expressionless. As
Herman notes, “avoiding any physical expression of his inner turmoil.” And sometimes, when all
this fails, “children try to appease their abusers with displays of automatic obedience.” Similarly,
the future conservation E3 kids redouble their efforts to control the situation in the only way they
think possible: by trying to be good.

In the conservation E3, a history of implicit psychological abandonment by the parents is

characteristic. As a child he learns to get by in life with different ingredients; do not disturb, do
not cause problems, go unnoticed, take care of the parental figure, and solve problems of any
kind. And so, over time, the attitude becomes more and more “tough,” and gives way throughout
life to a constant putting oneself above others, to a lack of confidence in organismic self-
regulation, and to ideas of: “I'm only worth it if I'm the best” and “I only exist if I'm useful.” His
constant struggle to be the best or useful is born of a silent demand not to be abandoned.

Self-sufficiency
One of the central features in the conservation E3 is power alone. This power of action and
resolution of situations with the use of their own resources reinforces their capacity and the
image they have of themselves: that of a self-sufficient person, with great resolving and efficient
capacity. A self-image that in turn compensates for the deep sense of awkwardness and shame
that lies behind the mask of a conservation E3. Shame and awkwardness were early repressed
feelings; on the other hand, the capacity and improvement were valued positively by the
environment. They are usually precocious children in speech, walking, and the development of
adult responsibilities.

Control
Control is the reverse of anguish, and anguish or fear is for an E3 an overwhelming and not
allowed experience. The avoidance of internal anguish is controlled by turning outwards, without
paying attention to the internal world. Hence, the conservation E3 is available for everything that
comes from outside.

This feature assumes the crazy idea that life can and should be controlled. This means that the
inner life is automatically under control and there are no internal movements, with a continuous
self-cleaning based on not containing or resting anything internal, and resolving conflicts in such
a way that the other stays well with one. That is why it does not support the anger of the other or
the conflict in any way. Paradoxically, and due to his need for things to be done and to be as he
believes, there is great difficulty in giving space and validity to the other, and to his way of being
and proceeding.

One of the singularities of the chameleon is graphic, with each eye looking in a different
direction. This is how the conservation E3 could be seen: with one eye controlling the one next
to him and the other focused on what he is doing.
This movement of control, which responds to his need for security, leads him to control
absolutely everything around him, from everyday life (order inside the house, in objects) to the
family (giving advice, resolving issues), through the job. It is a control with which he
manipulates the people he lives with so that they do what he needs for the sake of his safety: “if
you do what I think is good, I will be calm.” He does not realize how he truly is to others, and
there he also masks reality. Well, on the other hand, his great arrogance, putting himself on top
of others with the attitude of: “I know and you have no idea how things are,” comes from a
hidden fear of the other, of life, of movement and lack of control.

Hyperactivity
Another facet of conservation E3 is multitasking, feeling all the better the more you do. In this
sense, action energizes this personality, which finds satisfaction in multifunction. Being busy is
therefore a way of feeling safe, and moving quickly from one thing to another, a way of
controlling.

Multitasking does double duty. On the one hand, it reinforces the idea of power and capacity.
That idea of “how good and how smart I am” must continually strengthen it because that is how
the internal clumsiness is hidden. On the other hand, it prevents him from contacting the inner
world; that is, it makes it difficult for him to stop with himself.

Helpful compulsion
Another inseparable feature of emptiness is an automatic tendency to take care of the need of the
other, which dynamically depends on not being able to hold the emptiness of “not satisfying”
since there is a deep fear of real contact. The conservation E3 does not know how to deal with
reality and this clumsiness is not supported or shown, but translates into “not knowing how to
say no”: he does not know how to defend himself, nor ask nor enter into conflict; making it
easier for him, apparently, to be there for the other and thus avoid confrontation.

Covering the needs of others has a double function. On the one hand, conflict with the other is
avoided, who does not get in touch with the dissatisfaction of his need and therefore not with
frustration, so he does not direct his destructiveness towards the helper. On the other hand, the
conservation E3 is so busy with others that they don’t take charge of themselves. The feeling of
not needing induces an apparent strength and perfection, which gives him power over himself; a
feeling that is reinforced by the fact of beginning to be a reference figure for the other and thus
earn a place.

It is also true that the helping compulsion is sometimes a projection of one's need. In this sense,
the conservation E3 must learn to ask, to allow himself to be nurtured by others, to abandon the
role of strength, to show fragility, to ask for forgiveness, to say no, and to live and let live.

Be a reference person
As we have just seen, another trait to consider is that of the person of reference, which is
dynamically dependent on the helping compulsion. It comes from the tendency to do what is
expected of one, for not sustaining the conflict of being inadequate. This attitude becomes not
knowing how to be silent or still, which leads to a tendency to be the leader of any meeting,
although not in an “obvious” way, but rather by weaving a network to become essential. By
always having something to say and something to offer, the conservation E3 creates
dependencies.

Through his well-intentioned way of being, he can take the conversation where it is expected,
always seeking recognition from others and adapting his feelings to what he believes is expected
of him. It is characteristic that this conceited person drives his “wedges” constantly, without
having finished listening many times to what the other person has to say, already having the
speech prepared and, contrary to what he neurotically believes, saying almost the same thing that
was just said, only with his finishing touch.

Confluence
If we consider the confluence of the conservation E3 as a form of survival, we can understand
the demand to be for the other as a lifestyle. This aspect leads to the development of highly
intuitive individuals, who in this facet resemble the E9, although with very different motivations.

The pain of individuation, the risk of being, and fear are hidden under doing what is expected of
one, which is a way of not being aware of the automatism that covers the existential void of not
knowing what to do for oneself, of having no idea where to direct their steps without someone
else to mobilize them towards constant action.

It should be added that the fission or confluence with the other is a way of feeling power. By
creating dependency from goodness, the idea that one is necessary is fed. However, this entails
enormous difficulty in being alone, in recognizing one's own feelings, needs and limits. In
addition, this confluence or being for the other makes it possible to blame them if something
does not work, in an evasion of the responsibility of being, feeling, and needing.

This not knowing how to be oneself without the look and approval of another person is similar to
the fusion that E9 experiences, but instead of being an automatic and indolent servility, in E3 it
has a background of helping, advising and listening so as not to feel alone, and to be loved. It is a
long-term investment, where the ingredients of patience, restraint, hindsight, and endurance are
common.

The banishment of error

Related to the image of goodness and efficiency is not allowing the error. A conservation E3
does not distinguish the thought from the action: it acts without digesting the thought. In this
way, the first “mistake” for an E3 would be to stop with oneself, “be selfish,” focus on what he
wants for himself.

The mistake that there is in not wanting to make mistakes comes from the fear of
disqualification, of rejection. We are facing a vital need: rejection is like death for this subtype,
who understands that if someone censors his way, he is censoring him. In short: if doing is
censored, being is annulled.

Self-perfecting
Another characteristic feature of conservation E3 is to feel that overcoming is a lifestyle. It's not
just about doing better, but about being a better person. Adapting to the values expected of him
reinforces the idea of being someone adequate and perfect.

It is a way of keeping vanity at “the right level,” not lowering the bar and doing a little more
each time to surpass the previous mark, in front of others and in front of oneself. The
conservation E3 is a character that strives to do well and bears similarity to the E1, which is a
perfecter from morality, while the E3 is a self-perfecter from doing. From this position, he
teaches others how things have to be at peace so that they go well, without error and if possible
the first time.

Something very typical of this subtype is the “don’t do what I already did,” because it underlies
the belief that he does it better and in less time than the others. Buying time is important, so it
turns quickly to have more time to do more things, thus gaining a greater sense of efficiency and
capacity. Forgetting oneself with vanity here takes the form of fattening the ego through wear
and tear.

Order
When he loses control and an overflowing emotionality appears, the conservation E3 usually gets
angry with himself or with the person or situation involved. Because “what are emotions for?”
He considers that feeling is a waste of time and that it does not solve anything. Emotions break
the feeling of order and having everything under control.

Linked to perfectionism, order is a value that makes a lot of sense in the life of the conservation
E3, who is ordered in the different aspects of his existence, from the material order in the house,
to the family, or work.

Self-demand
Self-demand is like a runaway force that leads the conservation E3, by yet another way, to
disconnect. It prevents you from accepting things as they are and containing what you don't like
(such as anger with someone), demanding even more to be better.
Self-demanding has to do with not allowing mistakes and with things not going as planned,
something that generates a lot of contained anger, since the great effort that he undertakes many
times does not help him at all.

The persistent dynamic is not giving in to anything or anyone, controlling each step, reviewing
each other's gesture, and blaming oneself when what was intended has not come out. That is why
surrender means defeat, being characteristic of trying to solve or overcome a setback in “all”
imaginable ways to reach the intended goal.

Knowing how to sell

The image that an conservation E3 sells is that of a safe, reliable, kind, available, strong person,
who does not need help, who does it alone, who is not going to bother, who knows how to have a
good time, who does not get angry, who makes it easy, who is not going to create conflicts. But
unlike the persuasiveness of E7, where being admirable is in the service of complacency, at E3
the ability to sell an image is in the service of being accepted. For this reason, it is easy to love
but also not to be taken into account, because its availability and its good work ends up being
boring.

When considering enneatype three in a panoramic way, we are struck by its social and sexual
manifestations. But when we meet people of the conservative E3 type, we cannot exactly say that
we are dealing with a third type of vanity, because just as the proud of the conservative subtype
do not seem proud, the vain of conservation do not seem visibly vain to us either -and I have
come to characterize them as countervailing, using a language analogous to that of
psychoanalysis when it introduced the notion of the ―counterphobic‖ character, which hides its
fear through visibly audacious attitudes.

Over the years I have found that the same is true in the case of conservation of each of
the passions. In E1, for example, the fact that he does not seem angry and that he masks his anger
while defending himself behind benevolent attitudes is striking.
The case of the conservative E3, which seems not very vain, resembles that of someone
who is so determined to be a good person (that is, to follow the perfect or ideal model of the
good mother, the good housewife, etc.) such a way translates into an implicit taboo on vanity.
Therefore, it can be difficult for an inexperienced person to recognize a conservation E3, who
could be confused with an E1 or other traits.

If we ask ourselves what is his neurotic need, what does a conservational three need
above all else, it might seem that he would try first and foremost to be good; but that is a
universal commandment, present in almost everyone's life (although some people rebel against
it). More specific to E3 conservation is the concept, underlined by Ichazo, of security, and it
seems to me that a threatened security makes these people also develop a special autonomy.
Since they were not taken care of enough, they learned to take care of themselves, and later they
also take care of others. There is an atmosphere of security around E3, and they are often people
you turn to for advice, as they seem to specialize in problem solving. This passion for security
can oversimplify their lives, however, by narrowing their interests to what is most practical and
useful. Furthermore, when you want to give efficiency too much priority, you end up making
efficiency itself is efficient.

―I perceive myself retracing paths, less concerned with my image. I have less need to be nice to
everyone. I talk more openly with people, saying what I like and what I don't like. That means
not burying the person alive when I feel hurt, and I say frankly what hurt me. I feel that today I
have a truer self-esteem, less narcissistic, less dependent on the evaluation of the other‖, writes
Nilda.

● - fast, agitated, exuberant

● - frantic need to fill the emptiness
● - succumbing to the compulsive urge to do something to run away or modify it.
● - being the superwoman of the family and work
● - obsession with security
● - afraid of the anger of the other
● - out of contact his own emotions, mainly sadness
● - unable to accept and manifest his insecurity, vulnerability, fear
● - envy, his competitiveness and his feeling of inferiority
● - attached to the omnipotent idea of power with everything and the power of effort.
● - attachment to work that generates economic security as a vicious circle that feeds the
ego
● - pending the approval of others
● - need to be like a good and pretty girl
● - struggle for achievement, the need to build a safe environment (being on good terms
with others, home, work), the fear of transgression (one can afford to transgress any norm
or social role)
● - self-demanding and less controlling
● - The compulsion to action and speed
● - The urgency to do, do, do... I did them a lot of harm, especially my children, whenever,
due to the rush, I prevented them from taking responsibility for their learning, initiatives
and tasks, doing it for them
● - placed in the role of a good patient that extols the therapeutic alliance.
● - mechanism of self-justification and attribution of responsibility outside of oneself

There is in the 3 conservation that it is imperative to believe that one can do everything, even at
the risk of one's own health and self-care.
One of the loops that we observe in conserving vanity is that, when one finally realizes that one
is vain, then the censorship appears: ―how is it possible to be vain?‖ ―It's not okay to be vain.‖
―He is not virtuous.‖ But if we do not dare to clearly, authentically show vanity, then we are
accused—or, worse still, we are accused— of false modesty, and we start all over again: ―I
show vanity, I must not; I show modesty, I have discovered that it is false‖... It is the fish that
bites its tail. ―I recognize in myself a sensitivity that I did not know before, as well as a genuine
kindness that does not need recognition (am I being vain?),‖ writes Nilda. She wonders if to feel
what she feels is to be vain: the necessary gesture here would consist of a: ―so what?‖, in
assuming the part of doubt that generates the attitude here and now as something natural and not
wanting to constantly amend it, to leave oneself alone.

Any situation that was out of my control left me confused, scared, lost. The situations included
events in which I lacked an adequate response. I then had an impression of injustice,
misunderstanding or even of being lost. This could grow to the point where I would freeze, doing
the opposite of the normal movement of acting, acting, acting. After freezing, she cried like a
girl: a hysterical reaction from which the ice melted. I needed tears to feel myself, to breathe and
get in touch with me.

The three conservation is afraid to allow himself to feel emotions and feelings, lose
independence, need help

«I believed that love was pleasing the other's needs, meeting his expectations, doing what he
needed: I believed it was doing. I never believed that love was just feeling. Later I perceived an
enormous difficulty to give and to receive. I was afraid of being in the hands of the other‖,
affirms Sandra.

―I imagined that I could go and do whatever I wanted, with a sense of total independence,
traversing the world, working myself to exhaustion, getting recognition and applause. Of
course... without vanity, without boasting, with modesty. I didn't realize that I was a slave to
myself. Seeing this is still critical at times‖, says Assumpta.

In the conservation subtype, maternal love predominates as a way of channeling love through
being useful to others. For an individual of this subtype there is a compulsion to ensure the
maintenance of conditions of security and stability that provide the necessary feeling of having
their living environment under control. The need for affection is therefore reflected in a constant
care of the other and in avoiding that conflictive or inappropriate situations arise.

Adaptation, adaptation, reaches the point of forgetting your own feelings in favor of a loving
model. This attitude, although self-generated in childhood with respect to their parental figures,
reaches its maximum conflict with love relationships.
Admiring love, on the other hand, never comes to encompass everything in the existential sense,
that is, it does not take so much space in the bosom of the individual. Thus, an E3 conservation
feels admiring love only with respect to certain people; admiration is given only to very obvious
people. This is the case of some spiritual teachers, scientists or relevant people in some field that
is of importance to the individual.

Turns to the work in favor of the world that the admired represents, neglecting the sphere
of pleasure and daily life.

He expects to receive admiring love in all areas of his life, giving little, instead, his admiration to
others. How is he going to give admiring love if he is for that, to be admired?

―Erotic love is camouflaged in being useful to another. If I am useful to the other, the other will
give me what I need out of obligation. I do not understand a love of sharing in equality, a love
without price. For this reason, the love of satisfaction of instincts and pleasure seems
meaningless to me,‖ says Amor.

I need to concretely see the collapse of the idealized image of myself, of the conservation three,
as well as the defeated physical image (of an attractive and charismatic woman), to convince
myself of the need to look beyond the material side.

When I found myself with a deformed face and could no longer count on the influence of the
physical, I necessarily had to ask myself who I really was, since the image now no longer gave
me more security. Thus, I have been ashamed and I have seen this even in the relationship with
other people, because I have found myself isolated,‖ says Elia.

Adopted a false mode of contact with the other, without real listening or empathy, only with my
inauthentic physical presence, just to save face. He also thought that the others behaved falsely;
perhaps it was a way to justify myself and not to evaluate an alternative‖

―Maternal love seems the most developed in our subtype, empathy, pleasing and understanding
the other, to the insane extreme of erasing ourselves: that is giving to be loved.

The omnipotent idea of being able to determine the course of one's life and action. The idea of
pretending to ―get it at the cost of everything‖. The difficulty of trusting and trusting. The idea
of knowing what is right and wanting to save the world. The need to feel better. The denial of
one's own competitiveness. The denial of one's own envy and one's own opportunism.

―The pretense of controlling the world, the insensitivity, the lies, the arrogance, the fear of
feeling, the superheroine, the fantasies in relation to the world and the ideal self, the false power,
the idealization of happiness, a bit of rigidity and a bit of detachment,‖ says Sandra.
E4 - Social
Imaginative and Creative
The emotional, sensitive, and introspective aspect allows you to more easily access your creative
and imaginative side. From an early age, he likes to console himself and entertain himself in
fantastic and dreamlike worlds in which his imagination allows him to compensate for the great
inhibition he feels in real life. This imaginary world that he has created and in which he
somehow believes will be able to materialize in the future, serves him to metabolize everyday
reality. Poetry, art, and music become channels of expression to the outside.

Sensible
Low self-esteem and the need to defend yourself from others lead you to reject criticism or
behaviors that challenge you. Their gaze perpetually directed to the outside world and the
continuous comparison he makes with himself lead him to give a subjective reading and
interpretation of what happens; the slightest criticism annihilates him, he feels that he has given a
lot, more than the others, he finds himself again without recognition. In addition, since it is
difficult for him to express his opinion directly for fear of being hurt or conflicted, he expects the
same from others (understanding, empathy).

Romantic
For this character, life is hard, difficult and sad, but it is characterized by a romantic feeling
inside. Thanks to his romanticism, the world becomes lighter and more bearable, it is as if he
added a note or a touch of color to so much pain. The romantic vision that he harbors within him
is expressed in the world through poetry, music, and the search for positive living situations and
opportunities. It is as if he did not resign himself to the harsh reality through his romantic aspect.
It is as if through romance he sweetened a bitter pill.

Passive-aggressive and Self-destructive

He is not allowed to express anger, he always represses hatred. Showing hatred for his mother
(or father) would be tantamount to losing her, something no child could afford. So he learned to
repress his hatred and swallow it, he began to hate himself believing himself defective, unworthy
of love, guilty of not being loved, in order to save his mother. The parental anger you
experienced in childhood is too destructive and distressing.

Introspective
The closure, the isolation in which he takes refuge as a child, and in which he grows up,
somehow leads him to spend a lot of time in contact with himself, listening to and analyzing
himself, doing with himself what no one did when he was a child. Pain and contact with
suffering continually stimulate him to study himself and to investigate his inner dynamics. He
longs to get out of his suffering and has to continually face it, but he does not believe that this
can be done by acting or making decisions in his own life. Instead, he prefers an interior
movement of study and analysis of how he is, what he feels and why.

Reserved
He is extremely private, and only talks about himself and his intimate experience with very few
people, as he does not trust others to understand him. Since childhood he has experienced not
being understood, not being seen, having the feeling that no one is aware of his needs, and
therefore, as an adult, he has no faith that there is someone who can understand him deeply.

Feminine
Delicate, sweet, and languid. It poses in a delicate and tender way, and therefore also in the
masculine social E4, the characteristics of listening, welcoming, understanding, caring, as well as
a friendly physiognomy in which the smile, a manifestation of benevolence towards the world, is
always insisted as a background note. There is no trace of aggressiveness or attack in him, but of
sweetness and tenderness.

Gentle
He is always kind, expresses himself in soft ways and approaches, as he wants to avoid conflicts
and losses. Use kindness to please the other, try to avoid behaviors that can provoke or irritate.
She has learned to stand on her toes in the world, to try to prevent or avoid the parent's mood
swings or attacks, and thus has learned since childhood that this soft way is what works best for
her in the relationship.

Comprehensive
Willing to understand the motives of others, strong empathy combined with fear of abandonment
and conflict makes you lenient and benevolent towards the motives and reasons of others. He
tends to put himself in the place of the other, he justifies his actions even in situations in which
he is humiliated or is not seen, he has difficulties with separation, as well as in primary
relationships. From a young age he learns that it is better not to express his opinion or clearly
what he wants because this creates a distance with his parents. Thus he learns to understand
them, to justify them.

Lazy and Procrastinator

You are recalcitrant about committing and lazy about getting a task done. He tends to postpone
his execution because he always feels that he is not up to the task and very often he believes that
he is incapable or that he does not do it to the best of his ability. Fear of failure paralyzes you.
Obviously, this is closely related to low self-esteem and lack of confidence in their own abilities.
No one ever believed in him; as a child he was not only not encouraged, but which, on the
contrary, was devalued. His procrastination is linked to the need to do things as perfectly as
possible, even beyond. He does not admit mistakes to himself and this requires him in the actions
that he then undertakes enormous energy to complete the task.
Criticism and Self-disqualification
He is critical and disqualifying both with himself and with others. He tends to be critical of
himself because it is the experience he has had. It has been heavily criticized, disqualified. To the
extent that he compares himself with others and in order not to be completely annihilated by the
superiority of others, he tends to have a critical look and to express, not directly, disapproval,
negative judgments about the other, his way of being, or to work. So the criticism of the other is
born of an attempt to survive, not to be completely crushed by the comparison with the outside
world.

Sadness and Suffering

He is sad and suffers from a young age, even before he is aware of it; when he becomes an adult
he continues to drag this suffering, since he remains attached to that need to receive that has
never been satisfied. His attention does not shift, he does not find compensation in life because it
is as if he is still waiting for that love. There is a part of him that is obstinate in not wanting to
give her up and that is why he does not learn to give himself the love that he did not receive in
childhood. Thus, love becomes something sublime, inaccessible, almost impossible to find and
experience.

Proud
He reacts superbly to an offense and a wound, in the sense that in order to defend himself he
creates a distance with the other, or he even leaves, separates, becomes cold and distant. He does
not back down, he resists his suffering without showing it and confuses pride with strength, he
has the illusion that through pride he can protect himself. It retriggers the wound in the same way
that it hurts the most.

Shy
You like to be social and need others, but you tend to hide and find it difficult to expose yourself,
especially in a new and wide social context. Shyness is due to an excessive concern for the
judgment of others, the perception of being inferior to others and a feeling of inadequacy. From a
very young age he experiences the weight of being judged, often being asked to be different than
he was or to better fit the context. You develop an excessive tendency to focus on your inner
world of thoughts, emotions, and behavior.

Pessimistic and Distrustful

You perceive the world as dangerous and unpredictable, so you tend to always see the negative
side of things and situations. Through his pessimism he believes he can anticipate and control the
pain he will feel when something bad happens, because he is sure it will! He has no confidence
in the course of events or even in himself, this becomes functional to remain passive and
withdrawn, and at the same time to be able to complain and suffer.
Insecure
He has the constant doubt that his actions or words can lead to difficult or irremediable
situations, and that they can lead him to disappoint the other and be abandoned by him; this, of
course, makes him very insecure. As a child, the father corrected his actions a lot or even
criticized him often, which made him insecure and hesitant, especially when it came to taking the
initiative or acting instinctively.

Complain and Claim

He complains about small things, he is impatient. Need to continually express and externalize
dissatisfaction (I'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I'm bored). Through the complaint he seeks attention and
confirmation that another is available and sees him. Complaining is also their way of feeling the
other person is present in the relationship, it is a bit like a thermometer to check that they are
always there, that they have not gone away. However, in situations where he is really hurt or has
a real deep need, he tends to withdraw and not share, because he thinks that no one will be able
to help him. The emptiness and anguish he feels are indescribable; he doesn't feel like he can
trust anyone, he distrusts others and life so much that he thinks that no one can really help him in
the face of so much pain (and, above all, that there is nothing he can do to stop it). It is as if he
were desperate, exhausted. He also feels shame wash over him; showing yourself in such pain in
front of the other person makes you feel enormous shame and E4 feels even more miserable.

Silence
It is silent, it tends not to make noise, not to be noticed, not to bother. To be accepted, one must
not disturb the other, not disturb one's own mother, and for this reason, as an adult, one tends to
be silent, not to interfere with the atmosphere of the environment, not to be seen by the other.

Altruistic and Helpful

Being helpful and helping arises in the subject from the idea that love must be deserved, that it is
not free. He has learned that in order to be loved, he must earn that love in some way and that is
why, when something is asked of him, he spontaneously puts himself at the service of the other
person. In addition, he has experienced the feeling of need and, therefore, it is as if he somehow
knows from within the feeling of the one who needs help, and being clearly empathetic, it is
automatic for him to go to the other. Finally, we must add to tell him that he finds it difficult not
to do someone's request. Backing away makes him uncomfortable; when he does, he feels that he
is in danger of losing something, perhaps of losing the other person or of being abandoned.

Hypersensitive
It is extremely sensitive to loud noises, raised tones of voice, and sudden gestures. It is as if he
had developed in his existence a sense of constant danger, as if he was constantly on the alert
when exposed to the danger of being attacked and therefore reacts with jerks. Sometimes even
with excessive vocal emissions in reaction to environmental stimuli that may arise suddenly.
Jealous
He is jealous of his partner, but he can also be jealous of other beings he loves, even friends. His
jealousy comes from the fear that someone else will be preferred over him, since that is the
experience he had as a child, when he felt ignored compared to his brothers. Furthermore, this
fear is made even more vivid by the fact that he has developed a lack of self-confidence and is
therefore convinced that another person can be much more interesting than he is in the eyes of
his beloved.

Empathic
He has a great ability to put himself in another's place, to live his emotional experience. This
attitude is supported by his sensitivity and emotionality. In addition, empathizing with others
allows you to feel useful in the relationship. Empathy unites the other and removes the feeling of
guilt for not intervening or helping.

The contrasts between the E4 character types are the most striking, since its different subtypes
seem more differentiated than in the other passions. When I explain this topic in Spanish, I
usually say that there are ―sufferers, long-suffering and insufferable‖.

The sufferers are the social fours. The social E4 is a person who complains too much, is very
tearful and often puts himself in the role of a victim. In the DSM-IV, a category of person given
to self-sabotage is suggested.

The characteristic pointed out by Ichazo for this character is shame, which descriptively seems to
me to be a success but it is not enough to describe a neurotic need. Certainly, these are people
who underestimate themselves, and therefore feel less than others. But how do you explain why
these people are so given to self-blame and to comparing themselves unfavorably with others?
The answer, it seems to me, is found in what Melanie Klein called the depressive position,
through which the boy or girl prefers to blame himself instead of unloading his rage against the
mother, whom he needs exaggeratedly. In a similar way, we can consider that the social E4 is
one who prefers to swallow his own poison instead of externalizing it towards the loved ones; he
has learned to introject his aggression in view of an exaggerated affective dependence.

The anger I felt was very intense and had turned me into tears and victimization. It was also an
excuse to let others make decisions for me and return in that way, again and again, to a feeling of
dissatisfaction and hatred towards the world and myself for not being able to make my own
choices or hold my views. Confrontation naturally became impossible.

Love was only given through complaint and pain. I put myself in situations where the
others could leave me, so that I could only see the couple through my devaluation and my self
hatred, despising them more the longer I stayed by my side. This manipulation occurred in all the
relationships he established. It served for others to give me, and it was also the way to reflect my
hatred and envy towards others.

Another common aspect in the couple's relationships was my

dependence on the mother figure and the conscious falsehood put at the service of maintaining
the relationship at any price. I also used to be very bandit and, at the same time, I thought they
abandoned me: first I gave myself over to over-contact and then my withdrawal was total.
I used to live in a messy way as a way to generate situations of social rejection. It was
typical of me not to be able to sustain any work commitment if it was not in my manipulative
way, which consisted of displaying a very loving and pseudo-restraining style at times and then
abandoning the task with the feeling that the energy was draining me and that I could not sustain
it in time because of any minor event that occurred, thanks to which I manufactured the feeling
of being rejected, of not being recognized, that others were given more than me…

The tremendous anxiety generated by the moments when I was exposed to the world used to
compensate for it with temporary disappearances: I locked myself up and isolated myself, I
dedicated myself to eating and then I began to have great problems of excess weight.

I could be very sweet, friendly and extremely good in public, and become aggressive and angry
in intimacy, also putting a great energy into it because of the emotions that I had kept in social
situations and that I unloaded by being alone with those I devalued.

The love of a couple was the central theme of my life: having or not having a relationship was
the purpose of existence. Life was melancholic and full of impoverishing experiences in this
regard.

● - felt that I could not sustain the responsibilities, nor be in relationships because,
definitely, I had touched myself less than others in the distribution of life.
● - My self-denigration was obsessive and it was impossible for me to be alone since
torturer thoughts came to my mind that I produced without rest.
● - very deep for having tangled thoughts and living strong emotions under a disguise of
softness and sweetness.
● - The repression of socially ill-seen emotions, such as anger or hatred, were transformed
into sadness and victimization in the impossibility of confronting them.
● - may be unable to taking of responsibilities in the workplace and being able to sustain
long-term commitments
● - difficulty I felt to find my place in a group and in society
● - may be less talkative and unclear in what they want to convey
● - self-denigration
● - cannot help myself in my inner processes without seeking help outside
● - may be unsatisfied with the present and miss the past
● - may idealize what others say or do
 ● - listening to so many comments of help, not giving credit to self
● - neurotic need to establish symbiotic relationships
● - letting myself be carried away by the emotional tremor
● - MAY be unable to cultivate thinking and the ability to cognitively elaborate
experiences.
● - felt in the shadow of others, I did for others for whatever selfish reasons, but I did not
take charge of my life.
● - much distance between my reactions in the public and in the private
● - repression or inhibition, does not validate what comes from inside me, chaining it to
tortuous, superegoic or guilty situations.

For a social four, enjoying a leading role for a certain time and with external support is usually,
at first, very important: it helps to develop a positive self-image and to dedramatize life; it also
lowers the terror of shame in exposure situations

In the theater, placing emotions in a situation or in a character represents a first way to not be so
seen and at the same time to be able to express oneself. Thus, shame, which retains the always
intense emotions and makes emotional thoughts entangle, can give way in the way of
expressing oneself and integrating different aspects of oneself.

E4- Sexual
Devaluer
Devaluation is present in the repertoire of defense mechanisms of this enneatype in all subtypes.
The difference in the sexual E4 is that it tends more to projection, to devalue the other, and to
openly blame him for his shortcomings and defects. In the enneagram there is no one more
devaluing than the sexual E4. Other enneatypes also devalue, but it is in the style that the
competition differs; it is the quintessential head trimmer to look comparatively taller. Devaluing
the other by belittling and blaming him as a way of not being in permanent contact with his own
sense of internal worthlessness.

Guilty and Blaming others

The sexual E4 is, of the three subtypes, the one that projects the most, and in this aspect it can
easily reach cruelty, above all displaying a great capacity for verbal aggression, as we have
already pointed out. Sexual E4s have a phobia of feeling how little they value themselves, and
also of feeling guilty. He tends to blame the other, compulsively needing to find someone
responsible for the feelings that he does not want or accept for himself.

On the other hand, he has no problem admitting his guilt dramatically when he feels that all is
lost. The fault can even be of life or of God himself, and it can be a form of manipulation. That is
to say, there is great mobility between the extremes that go from “I am not guilty of anything” to
the tear of “I am guilty of everything.”

“I have always moved between a very high ideal of myself, and on the other hand a very poor
self-image. With little packaging to recognize the pain and refusal to accept the responsibility of
life. I have always blamed God, my craziest idea has been that God has a plot against me.” - John
Lion

Irresponsible
What is observed in this way of functioning is the difficulty and little capacity to assume
responsibilities in the affairs of life. As we have seen, the sexual E4 tirelessly dedicates itself to
making something or someone (normally the couple) take care of those aspects that they do not
feel capable of sustaining or developing by themselves, with a feeling of their own right that is
difficult to reasonably question. Only with introspection work do they come into contact with
what it means to take responsibility for one's own life. They usually deposit in the other the need
for material sustenance or emotional support that allows them to put their energy into creativity
or navel gazing as really more important matters, which help them perpetuate the sense of being
special. If that sustenance does not arrive, they can develop the aspect of being misunderstood,
very present in this subtype, justifying outbursts of bad humor, anger, rudeness, etc. They
directly relate irresponsibility to complaint and protest, as a way of reacting to the fact that
responsibility is not understood: “The complaint and the protest work automatically in me; I live
the realities of life, common to all humans, more closely, as if they only happened to me that
way. Complaining is a childish mechanism that allows me to remain unaccountable and is
perhaps one of my most common neurotic traits. I protest about everything and if I don't express
it verbally, I protest in my internal dialogue. It's so automatic that sometimes the only thing that
stops me is the idea of ending up as a bitter and curmudgeonly man.” - John Lion

The sexual E4 also presents obsessive tendencies, either towards a person who is the target of his
love, or towards some activity in which he finds comfort, and these become the only lifeline and
something essential that is out there to solve the problems. Issues that he does not face on his
own, and perhaps to control a depression that he could not contain.

“Here came my encounter with yoga and inner work. I went to live in a community. It was a
lifeline and I became obsessed, I've always been very obsessed with the things I like. There has
always been something that I have placed my obsession on.”

Dissatisfied
Everything previously developed is basically based on dissatisfaction and the way of relating to
it. Although this topic will be illustrated in the section on love, we would like to underline in a
sympathetic way the Gata Flora style (“if they put it in, she screams and if they take it out, she
cries”) that this subtype boasts and that shows its almost dissatisfaction permanent in all areas. If
they don't hit him, he screams, if they hit him, he doesn't know what to do with it and most likely
despises it. Dissatisfaction is associated with the belief that nothing and no one is enough and the
experience of a bottomless void.

Emotionally labile
The sexual E4 swings a lot between euphoria and depression, there are no grays or nuances, they
move in extremes from everything to nothing, always or never, in fact they are common terms in
their vocabulary. This manic-depressive or cyclothymic tendency is found at various levels of
severity depending on the subject. We can read it from the passion for extremes that leads the
person to identify at different times with being the most wonderful or the shittiest. These subjects
can go from one state to another in very short periods of time, either due to external stimuli,
environmental circumstances, or internal ones, related to fantasy. Emotional lability is
characteristic of this subtype. This network of functioning leads to the intense way of life with
which these people identify so much, and which they use as another refined way of not being in
touch with real lack.

Transgressive and Intolerant of limits

People of this subtype do not easily adapt to limits imposed, either by authority figures, laws or
conventions, nor do they have many references to internal limits. We could mention here a
certain maladjustment (not as much as the lustful E8), restrained at times by the feeling of guilt
that usually appears. The transgression of limits is developed on many occasions at the level of
fantasy, before an audience or an imaginary other. It is not so important to break the limit itself,
but how this is seen by others; there is a pleasure in causing some kind of stir among the
spectators, as if from that place one could obtain a great adhesion or a great rejection, but in
short, something intense to enjoy and to talk about.

The sexual E4 is not very reserved, but he feels special pleasure for telling his experiences in a
compulsive and shameless way. His position is: “if I don't tell it, it's as if it hadn't happened to
me,” and if he feels that this provokes his audience, all the better. Actually, his goal, more than
sharing, is to impress and feel superior, even when what he says demeans him.

When they do not obtain with their manipulations (and it finally happens), they can undertake a
change and a path inward, taking responsibility, recognizing the lack as such and the drama. In
this way, begin to transit creative solitude, inner strength, and finally responsibility for your
thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Histrionic
This trait makes it sometimes difficult to recognize the character of this subtype as it can appear
very humorous, funny, and expressive. He likes to occupy the stage also in a theatrical way and
not only through the tragic. When he is in this polarity, he is sustained by a grandiosity that
makes him feel superior and that “I can do everything.” Obviously it is a temporary situation that
can end quickly, because he is very susceptible and sensitive to any adversity.

Selfish
Always finding a justification for his great suffering, difficulty, or lack of possibilities, it is easy
for him to be a person who is not very available to the needs of the other. He uses his suffering to
not carry out tasks or to delegate things to the other that he does not like or that require effort.
Egoism is also in the conviction that the suffering of the other is never as important as one's own.

Violent
We have already talked about aggressiveness and self-injury, here we want to underline the
harmful behavior that they can have towards others, reaching physical violence, which above all
acts in the relationship of a couple or family. Violence occurs in a special way when you do not
support frustration, or fear when you feel that you are losing control over the other.

Extravagant
Sexual E4s are not afraid of originality and often enjoy feeling different. He loves to be special,
unique, and original. And he succeeds. You can speak very explicitly without conforming to
good manners, as well as dress flashily and against the grain. His desire to be peculiar makes him
also brave and adventurous, minimizing risks and dangers.

Inconstant
Despite being very creative and talented people, they often fail to carry out their projects. The
self-ideal is very strong and low self-esteem is often hidden. They have many dreams and aspire
to occupy special places, and their thirst to be admired is so great that it is difficult for them to
sustain the slightest failure or any obstacle. The difficulty in maintaining discipline and tolerating
the necessary path can cause disappointment, and feelings of incapacity that are suddenly
masked with anger or devaluation also outwardly.

Jealous
Jealousy is lived with great intensity and is the reason for enormous scenes, especially in the
couple; but also, even disguising more or less well, they feel jealous in any situation: family,
work, social, and friendship. The constant competition that keeps them alive makes them
evaluate in each situation if they are preferring or choosing them with respect to others, and if
they do not feel chosen it hurts them a lot, provoking and jealousy projecting the one who
becomes their opponent. But he is also very clever, knowing the terrain, to provoke the jealousy
of others.

Overpowering
In relationships, in his impulse to be seen, and by his demand and need for things to be as he
intends, unable to be even-tempered or feel equal, he imposes himself many times with a
modality that runs over, abuses, oppresses, humiliates, and discounts. Although being polar can
also be overwhelming in its generosity, care, and concern for the other.

Vain
He shares with the neighboring E3 this characteristic, and with the triad dependent on the image,
in this case to hide his envy, as if he would dress up and apply makeup on himself attempting to
cover the horror of his internal atmosphere that he is so ashamed of. As we have seen, the
perception of oneself is in a continual series of ups and downs, and in the moments of ascent,
vanity accompanies it, such as the excessive belief in one's abilities and the attraction it causes in
others. If he is in a good mood, he takes great care of his appearance (according to his canons, of
course) and likes to be recognized, although compliments make him a little uncomfortable
because deep down he never fully believes them. So he can manifest himself as arrogant,
conceited, self-centered, and with high points of queen/king narcissism, considering others as
mediocre.

Sarcastic
The sarcasm of sexual E4 is a mixed fruit of his bitterness, and his wit and talkativeness. He does
not laugh healthily at himself or at reality, but rather mocks with scathing and cruel irony,
offending or teasing. And they have a lot of ability to do it, only, seeking excessive attention,
they ridicule, humiliate, or insult. In effect, the etymological origin of sarcasm is linked to
“biting the flesh” (of the victim). In their histrionics, they appeal to humor cleverly, but
maliciously seeking to make the other look bad or if they themselves, if they themselves are also
the object of their sarcasm. However, this trait sometimes serves as an escape valve for anger, to
release it before it becomes uncontrollable and dangerous.

Cheerful and Chatty

They are usually very happy people, especially in moments of euphoria within their manic-
depressive peaks. Just as when they are down they are the most dramatic in the enneagram, when
they are on top they become the funniest, sharpest, and most capable of laughing at themselves
and their misfortunes. Quaint as they come, they can be talkative and very talkative in their
attempt to focus the audience's attention on them. If they find the paid field, there is no one to
stop them, and they even tire the audience, of course.

Seductive
Intense for the bad but also for the good, they are usually good lovers, and are well predisposed
for sex, since it is something in which they have specialized as a weapon to obtain love. They
know how to enjoy sex and also seek their own pleasure, unlike the other subtypes, who may be
more content with just giving pleasure to the other. But it's not just about sexual seduction; the
sexual E4 seduces even without realizing it. In general, they have a strong erotic charge that
permeates all their movements; walking, dancing, eating, talking, and they know how to handle it
well when it is directed or focused. Seducing and rejecting often becomes in the sexual E4 the
story of never ending, an endless circle. They are attentive to what they like and detect what
works and what does not. It is a peacock that only unfolds its beautiful tail when there is
someone who, perhaps without knowing it, has previously seduced it. They are good observers,
analyze and capture who they want to seduce.

Sensitive and Artistic

When they take the final steps to grow internally, they can reach high degrees of understanding
and empathy with the other, and also be experts in the ability to confront in an open and positive
way. They have a deep emotional wisdom that translates into a good understanding of the human
being, his emotional range and the availability to connect, and be compassionate. They are
highly sensitive and spend much of their lives immersed in internal mental landscapes, where
they feel free to cultivate and analyze their feelings, and out of a desire to manifest this inner
world they tend to have a great interest in the arts and many become real artists in different
fields. They have the ability to be very creative, thanks to their emotional richness, and their
fertile imagination is usually translated into artistic work or other fields in which they contribute
the new, the original. They have an important aesthetic sense of life, they value beauty in all its
forms, they are aesthetically concerned with self-expression and self-revelation in the general
nature of their lifestyle. If they are given to art they can be profound, peculiar, and novel.

Because of the drama of the character they can be good actors. They seek to give everything an
artistic and special touch. They are among the people who investigate, and investigate the most
in personal growth. They have an interest in finding ways out of the neurotic. Due to the
experience of dissatisfaction and relational problems, they are usually well predisposed to
therapies. When they find a bond of trust, respect and affection, they can commit and respond
positively to treatment.

Intellectual
Among the E4 subtypes, the sexual is sometimes highly intellectualized. This is revealed in his
aspirations, his inclination to knowledge, to study, to research the most varied subjects, but
above all humanistic and philosophical. They love to read and be informed and, in many cases,
they are strongly involved in social or political commitment. In his stubborn non-conformism,
passion for criticism, rebellion against the system, they define him as a revolutionary, although
the ideals of justice for which he fights may be based on a very personalized perception of reality
that refers to his need to compensate for his feeling of injustice.

If the social E4 suffers more than the other subtypes from feeling guilty about any desire, the
sexual E4 turns against shame by becoming shameless in order to satisfy its intense desires.
Therefore, even if it is embarrassing, it will knock on every possible door. He becomes insistent,
even against frustrations, as if he thought according to the saying that the baby who cries the
most is the one who suckles the best. "The more I complain, the more I'm going to get," he seems
to think. It's just that this strategy, which works well in childhood, doesn't work as well in adult
life. People who are too insistent, demanding, demanding, tend to be bothered and rejected, and
Thus their vicious circle arises, in which rejection leads to protest and protest to rejection.

Ichazo's name for the characteristic passion of sexual E4 was hate, which is descriptively
appropriate for these people who are so expressive about their anger. But this may not
sufficiently explain his motivation, which is why it seems better to me to speak of competition,
or competitiveness.

We could characterize envy of the sexual subtype as aggressive oral envy, which bites.
Psychoanalysis speaks of "cannibalistic" impulses. It is not only wanted, but it is wanted with
anger. This is the sin of Cain, our ancestor: ―I envy you and therefore I kill you‖. I envy the
rich,
and I started a revolution. I envy your intellectual superiority, and for that I will cut off your head
(then... I will seem taller!) And when we talk about cutting heads, we are talking about the
invalidation, the contempt, the aggression that is expressed in the devaluation of what enviable,
as in the case of the fox and the supposedly green grapes.

The great obstacle that the sexual E4 runs into in order to get to work in depth with his character
is to recognize that he is ill, to surrender to the evidence, to get rid of the stubbornness that
supposes that, most of the time, what he considers to be sincere and authentic in his way of
expressing himself is actually pure hatred and competitiveness.

They are emotions that feedback self-hatred and expand it outwards with all that it brings about
unhappiness of oneself and others.

● - childhood lack, the terror and fascination with my father, the sexual fears
● - believing that I was part of a very special group, something out of the ordinary
● - confuse a lack of perseverance with a lack of talent because it leads to detachment from
reality, hating it, hating yourself and hating others along the way
● - may get discouraged or not throw everything away when there is no quick and
unanimous response
● - bound to be frustrated because he takes his desires for realities.
● - everything is going to be unbearably dull and boring if he puts aside his romantic vision
of life
● - tendency to self-destruction
● - parenthesis within life waiting for something more exciting
● - using eyes for the benefit of the imagination
● - most of the time he believes what he says, that he explains himself, and he just gets
agitated
● - difficult to follow him when he is passionate, that it is difficult to understand him, and
not break contact with the interlocutor when that happens
 ● - escaping from the harshness of the discovery with excesses of crying, kicking, hateful
exits that distract from the real lack
● - want to control something as uncontrollable as affections and also to deny others what
one allows oneself with total freedom
● - Anger and moodiness often serve to avoid feeling clumsy, tired, depressed
● - may be unable accept oneself lacking and vulnerable
● - cannot listen to feedback regarding harshness, aggressiveness, and outbursts without
defending yourself with the hackneyed tagline: "Yes, it's true, I'm that nasty, and you
more so!"
● - dramatically attached to the past and to be in the present
● - crazy idea that everything has to be changed, as if one could start living from scratch,
that what is there is worthless, that everything has to be done
● - temptation to internally caricature yourself as a dangerous monster or a moron.
● - defending oneself from what worries one by anticipating misfortunes
● - a crime to be wrong, that I am going to sink if I admit it, the world is going to stop,
although egoically I would like it to.
● - thinking the world is complex

In group work, when my colleagues felt something different from mine, if I was in pain and they
were in joy, I called them frivolous and superficial. If it happened the other way around, they
were boring. With so much looking outside and comparing experiences, I lost my center, I lost
attention to what I had to work on. Over time I realized that I grew up believing myself to be the
most transparent, the most mature of all but that deep down all this served to not take
responsibility for my spiritual laziness. If things went well, I would be excited. If I played empty,
I would get in a bad mood.

The discomfort caused by the lack of self-esteem increases hatred and is a vicious circle from
which one has to force oneself to leave. It is a matter of will.

―Overprotected by my grandmother and excessively watched by my father, I have grown up

away from the other girls. I am forbidden to go to the park in case bad manners and diseases
catch me. Clumsy both in games and in social relations, I try to be the center of attraction at
breaks, performing the operettas of my father's theater. I am half successful, because what I sing
to you sounds strange, ridiculous. I cover up the pain of seeing myself inadequate by allying
myself with migrant girls. I try to understand them better than anyone. With them I build a
separate world against the locals, whom I relegate to the side of the insensitive and mediocre. I
kill them internally with hatred and disqualification‖

The sexual E4 finds it difficult to recognize that he is inventing characters, although it apparently
gives him security and makes him interesting, he hates and kills himself. Furthermore, as one
works with oneself, one realizes that this unrealistic way of being in the world, with an emphasis
on aesthetics, is not harmless but also turns into hatred towards the other, competing with others.
him in the name of exquisite sensibility. That this elegant way of attacking is supported by
another warrior, forceful, sectarian and Manichaean way of judging others. That in friendship the
elitist affinity prevails (tastes, hobbies, opinions and shared moods) over being with the other
without having to prove anything.

It is difficult to recognize without deceit or justifications that one is not as empathetic as one
thought, that one is clumsy in relating to the other because they lack naturalness in dealings, as if
affection were not enough. Observing himself in this, the sexual E4 runs into the narcissism of
the subtype: he does not see the other, he is not taken into account, but he sees himself trying to
shock him, provoke him, wasting brilliance, humor, etc., to be the protagonist of the encounter.

Sends crossed messages when communicating with the other: excess of gestures, sighs, laughter,
jumping from one topic to another, seeking complicity, seducing with winks, with
understatements... All of these are smoke screens, performances that are not relevant and mislead
the real content of the conversation and the meeting.

This posture of power in front of the world deflates when the sexual E4 is alone. What heals is
discovering how orality towards the outside becomes cannibalism towards the inside: not
stopping to go around your navel reviewing states of mind, remembering who offended you,
ignored you or congratulated you, who agreed and was against, etc.

On the other hand, the extreme demand for transparent friendships, the impossible search for the
ideal friend who understands everything, who shares everything, is to enter a labyrinth with no
way out in which one finds oneself face to face with reduced hatred. to the absurd:
―My unconditional and perfect friend should be just like me, but it turns out that I hate myself,
so there is no solution...‖. I think that is where the root of hatred is hidden, in touching the true
feeling of lack, the real lack. It is better to realize, although it is overwhelming to admit it, that
alone with oneself one tends to want to die because one does not really know who one is, nor
what one wants, nor what one desires. It is crucial in the process to recognize the tendency to
self-destruct and to want to destroy the other because it highlights the lack that arrogance covers.

It helps to better understand some of the subtypes to see yourself as a pampered and pampered
child when the common thing in the sexual E4 biography is to attribute that to another brother. It
is not so easy to accept that one has not been the favorite. It is known but it is necessary to
surrender to the evidence without inventing stories, or putting yourself above it, surrendering to
the pain that it has been so that one has not had enough care or attention.

The sexual E4 complains, laments, is dissatisfied, suffers a lot but does not let himself be
touched completely by what hurts.
The sexual E4 is passionate about the belief that if the merit is not all his, he is left with
nothing... Everything and nothing are especially dangerous words for this character because they
open the doors to unreason, to the excess of hateful hell.

The sexual E4 resists being seen as authoritarian, intolerant and/or rigid. The profound change
comes when he becomes aware of how he covers his mouth or intimidates with bad humor,
anger, rudeness.

Dramatic exaggeration often engulfs issues of guilt. From the outside, it is not difficult to
recognize the sexual E4 as deeply guilty. However, the experience of having denied guilt due to
overconfidence in the veracity of the impulse is common to the subtype. One does not admit
guilt because guilt is a natural state in which one systematically and robotically apologizes
without knowing why.

E4- Self-Preservation
Self-demand and Perfectionism
Closely related to tenacity lives self-demandingness, a self-revolutionary orality that pours on
itself the tacit demand, originally directed elsewhere. It feeds on tenacity, since it demands more
and more, raising the bar and what is at stake requires, on the other hand, having the resources to
sustain this task. But self-demand also has to be accompanied by dissatisfaction and self-hatred;
only in this way is the inner emptiness maintained and leaves the door open to self-evaluating
confrontation, useful to feel that it is never enough.

“Nothing is enough for me. A task that I tackle and that I finish always leaves me with a point of
dissatisfaction, like I have to be aware and say: ‘okay, that's fine, that's enough.’”

Although it is not difficult to confuse the search for perfection of an conservation E4 with that of
an E1, the conservation E4 accompanies this attitude with effort and dissatisfaction: the search to
be perfect or to do things perfectly is the consequence of a feeling of inferiority and an attempt to
compensate for the experience of being insufficient.

Empathy
Great sensitivity and observation capacity that allows them to capture and understand the
characteristics of those who are in front of them. Good listeners, they easily empathize with the
suffering of others and are able to contain and accompany, either because they see parts of
themselves in the other or because, knowing internal states of deep suffering, they have
developed self-support resources. It is a character capable of silence, of enduring the emptiness
of the other, of transmitting a deep understanding devoid of judgment. In suffering he feels a
bond, as he usually does with his original affections.
Difficulty accepting limits
Another aspect related to the above is the difficulty accepting internal and external limits. Greed,
which knows no impediments, does not even take into account the limited individual resources,
and demands more and more effort and work. Ignorance of one's own limits, especially in terms
of real possibilities, is accompanied by an idea of omnipotence. The deep capacity to endure, to
tolerate, sustains the equally profound inability to ask for help, an action that, in order to be
practiced, requires above all the awareness of not being able to do it alone, but also the humility
to feel the need. He is unable to recognize real needs, even if they are physical (sleep, rest, eat),
either because he experiences a certain level of disconnection with his own body or because
internally he avoids perceiving the needs that imply the inclusion of the other.

Masochistic attitude
The bad image of oneself, the lack of esteem with which one is in contact, and the idea of not
deserving lead him to even tolerate humiliating conditions, especially in the relational sphere.
The thirst for belonging, the need for love and recognition are such that they lead the subject to
tolerate without limits, with the expectation that this tolerance will be interpreted by the other as
a sign of love and appreciation.

Refinement
Good taste, love for the beautiful and for everything refined, a characteristic shared with the
other subtypes and revealing a deep sensitivity. In the conservative E4, this sensitivity is hidden,
and masked by bodily rigidity and emotional freezing.

Caregiver of others, Helpful, and Welcoming

The conservation E4 lives the relationship with others, friends and family with a great spirit of
service and care. In this approach he finds fulfillment, a sense of worth, and a practical way to
express love. He cares for others both materially and emotionally, though often risking taking on
more than is necessary. In service he finds an identity, a place that makes him worthwhile and
allows belonging.

Stoic and Little hedonistic

The attitude of earning merit through work leaves little room for fun and pleasure, dimensions
with which this character is unfamiliar. Pleasure is felt by always finding satisfaction in doing,
but directed towards something (a goal) or someone. It is difficult to be aware of what increases
the happiness of one without including the other, in fact this character is not clear about what
makes him feel good. Contact with nature, silence, being with oneself, listening to music,
dedicating time to oneself, are the possibilities that one sometimes allows oneself and that are
closest to an idea of pleasure, as well as, on the other hand, the pleasure of endless movement, of
spontaneity, and freedom of action and speech is hindered.

Resource finder and Decisive creativity

It is the ability to find solutions creatively, especially when they are needed for issues that
concern others and not oneself. Specifically, creativity is expressed in the will to find
possibilities through the omnipotent attitude of overcoming obstacles, of seeing alternative paths,
of not giving up despite the difficulties.

Compelling enthusiasm
This is even more evident when it comes to supporting the other person to regain their energy
and will to live, to transform and believe more in themselves. With a visceral desire for harmony
and beauty, he manages to communicate that achieving a state of integration is possible. This
stems from her own need, but also from a deep insight that healing (not perfection!) is a possible
reality. Finally, he knows how to convey the idea that everyone has value, precisely because it is
a need that he has always felt. These attitudes make you a good therapist, should you enter this
profession.

Dry in self-tenderness and Difficulty expressing tenderness

Affectionate, benevolent, helpful character, with great drive in friendships and relationships but
with deep shame of his own loving gestures. There is an impulse to restrain tenderness and
related actions, perhaps because in childhood they are related to total dependence, to showing the
fragility of feelings. So much dedication towards the outside world finds no correspondence
towards the self.

Difficulty confronting and Unclear on divergent expression

Difficulty clearly expressing a divergent and contrary position, especially if the majority thinks
differently. Internally, it remains in a different position that hardly has the courage to declare,
such is the fear of marginalization or confrontation.

Rigidity
It is a mental rigidity that finds its correspondence in both a physical and postural rigidity that
has to do with a unilateral way of seeing things, self-destructive in favor of the other, but also
with a physical and muscular rigidity, as if to simulate a condition of alert and fear always
present, being attentive to what is happening around, capturing every signal from a control
perspective, to know how to react and prevent.

Hoarding
Ability to save and accumulate both objects that can be useful and experiences. To keep to
oneself, a kind of greed, to have more to feel that one can always count on additional inner
resources to draw on.

Worth
With a brave character, he does not shy away from challenges, he knows how to endure with
patience and willpower even the toughest tests, whether they affect him or those close to him. If
the stake is high, there is no room for reflection on whether or not to undertake difficult paths.

Constant alertness and Control

Tends to live in a state of alert with a control attitude, and with straight antennas to perceive the
signals in time and know how to act preventively.

Ironic
Capable of being funny, ironic, even sarcastic at times, as a way to sublimate anger. He has
humor in a subtle and intelligent way, the irony about his own characteristics, about the heavy
events of life, as an attempt to cushion the pain and access a certain lightness.

Sense of justice
He lives a deep desire for justice that arises from his own experience of having suffered injustice.
He strives and fights for equality, and believes in the value of solidarity. You can be very
disciplined in following your ideals.

Spiritual
Thanks to his contact with lack, he seeks the transcendent as a way to free himself from his
painful experience and the feeling of incompleteness that accompanies it, but also as a vehicle to
make sense of himself, of life and to seek the Beyond. This aspiration to transcendence, if not
freed from the ego, runs the risk of being a stoic search for sacrifice, a narcissistic ideal of
holiness to redeem oneself from deprivation.

Different from the "sufferer" (social E4) and the "insufferable" (sexual E4) is what is called the
"suffered" (or ―long-suffering‖) in Spanish, an expression that speaks to us of a capacity for self
frustration and endurance.

Instead of being a very tearful person, the sufferer is one who does not complain and avoids
crying in front of others, and who has learned to swallow a lot and endure pain without blinking.

How could we explain this in terms of motivation? What need can push a person to become a
masochist? It is something like saying to a parent or loved one: ―Do you see that I am not
complaining? Do you want me now? Do you see what a good boy, what a good girl I am?‖

The E4 conservation aims to make the virtue of resistance to frustration. Many times I have
explained it with an anecdote from Lawrence of Arabia, according to the famous film, which
shows him in an office in Cairo lighting someone's cigarette and then putting out the match with
his fingers. Someone asks him surprised: ―What are you doing?‖ And he explains that, in this
way, he trains himself to endure pain. He had developed from childhood this supposed virtue of
stoically enduring pain, and it surely served him during his exploits, which earned him the fame
of a great hero, for not even among the Arabs had anyone known how to withstand the harshness
of the desert in such a way.

In the E4 conservation, supporting is a passion, but how to explain it? I think the key is in the
introjection of greed. The visible envy that presents the sexual E4 as a demanding and insistent
oral aggressive, becomes here a counter-envy directed against the person himself, now in the
form of a self-demand that is also self-devouring.

The envious character is based on undervaluation. To do this, he looks at what does not work and
what is missing. It is installed in its lack and develops a very intense yearning for completeness
that it handles differently according to each subtype. Who envies loses out in the comparison he
establishes with others, with what they are, with what they do or with what others have.

By introjecting that mother who has not emotionally welcomed the baby (whom for various
circumstances she has rejected or separated from him), the bad look at himself is also
incorporated into his character. In this way, constant raving is served. The superego resulting
from this incorporation is, at the same time devaluing, very demanding, especially in this
subtype. That is why it is essential to see the face of this demanding character and dismantle him
and take away the enormous power that the tenacious person continues to give him.

In this subtype, the longing and effort to achieve what is distant brings the feeling of being able
to obtain that wonderful thing that was lost. The tenacious pretends to stop being lacking and
free themselves from the bad image through a constant effort, like an ant, based on an important
self-devaluation. An effort that reads: ―I'm going for it at all costs‖, and that perpetuates the
crazy idea that "we have come to this world to suffer and to endure". Thus, it pretends to be
lovable.

On the one hand, the four conservation is an impulsive person who, in addition to exploding
from time to time in intimate relationships, is inhibited to achieve external recognition. In
general, he lives with anguish and guilt when he gets out of control, invades, imposes himself or
shows signs of passionate admiration or love. The possibility of getting out of hand, as we will
see, will be necessary for its healthy transformation, since its character structure is supported by
a high control of its impulses. These people agree that as children they were repressed in their
intensity, spontaneity, joy, naivety and/or verbiage.

● - fueled by the fact that the effort you make is meant to overcome a deficiency that is at
the base of the trait and is really just invented.
● - willing to do whatever it takes to get whatever it takes to give him legitimacy (titles,
work ...), as his devaluation system continues to operate, what he gets will not be enough,
 he will not deny his deficiency, he will not save him from his lack, he will not save him
from his lack, nor will it move you from your attachment to it.
● - spends a lot of energy fearing that what is being done will not be achieved and raising
the bar of the demand to counteract it
● - spends a lot of energy postponing actions necessary for the development of what he
wants to achieve and blaming himself for it
● - wears out looking for and striving where it already knows it will not turn out, and this
ensures the perpetuation of effort and devaluation.
● - may be unable to let go of the effort, let go of the control and let go of the neurotic
pretension.
● - may have trouble putting limits on the demands of others, without taking refuge in guilt
● - may not find value beyond what they do
● - may have trouble saying “no”
● - the body may be tense
● - may be unable to sense bodily needs
● - may be unable to rely on my good quality of work, to know how to taste the successes,
without completely disappearing the critical voice that points out everything that could be
improved.
● - may be unable to enjoy specific, concrete satisfactions that allow you to feel
comfortable with yourself

Strives to be saved from the lack in which he feels flawed. Let us add here that this bad image
that he intends to solve through effort hides and preserves a grandiose fantasy of himself. A
down narcissism fed by the ability to tolerate pressure and egodystonic sensations, and also by
the depth of his sensitivity and by what could emerge from himself (fantasized) if he got an ideal
love, an ideal job ... or being discovered by someone important.

Experience of fragility is not allowed. He covers it with tension and action. Vulnerability brings
him too close to the feeling of abandonment in front of which he has become strong, feeling like
a victim and resisting what is thrown at him. Feeling vulnerable triggers intense emotional
expressions that will need to be able to navigate.

At other times, touching vulnerability raises the fear of depression. Feeling the decline of
tonicity, without justifying it with the fears with which the dog above continues to press to
continue with the tenacious activity, opens space to accommodate, for example, the need,
differentiating it from the lack

E5- Social
Idealization
Idealization, the main feature of the social E5, gives a false sense of fullness and self-importance.
This subtype can be identified with the idealized part, leading him to love “perfect” and
transcendent things. Things around him are classified as either sacred or worthless. Idealization
masks a negative self-image, and there is a permanent conflict between his “real me” and his
totemic demands.

Rationalization
Of the intellectual types (E5, E6, and E7), E5 is the most intellectual. And of the subtypes of E5,
the social E5 is the most intellectual. This subtype rationalizes his experiences, transforming
emotions and sensations into information. The social E5 is impersonal, avoiding intimacy, and
relating through the head. Intellectual arrogance makes this subtype cold and distant, alienating
himself from other people.

Compartmentalization
Compartmentalization, as the typical defense mechanism of E5, is the way for this subtype to
defend against the fear of exposure. Thoughts and feelings are separated from each other, helping
the social E5 not become aware of what he avoids feeling. Emotions linked to past experiences
are lost.

Distancing
Despite being the most sociable subtype, this subtype is still seen as distant, reserved, and
withdrawn. The social E5 does not expect to receive anything from relationships, and thus easily
gives them up. There is an extreme attachment to the self.

Lack of action and Little energy

Due to a tendency to save energy, the social E5 suffers from great difficulties taking action. This
subtype is also barely available for relationships, as the consequence of saving energy.
Sometimes, all of their energy can be directed to areas of their lives they consider important,
usually in the service of an ideal. The social E5 sometimes never feels ready enough to put his
energy into the world, becoming a simple observer of life, and wasting both opportunities and
talents.

Concealed atmosphere
In relationships, there is a lack of transparency, as part of trying to maintain an ideal image.
Being mysterious and shy, the social E5 is always hiding part of himself.

Desensitization
The social E5 is both insensitive and hypersensitive. This subtype walks around indifferent,
being insensitive to the needs of others. At the same time, the social E5 is very needy and
vulnerable, something he compensates by becoming cold and distant.
Resignation and Difficulty saying no
The social E5 is resigned, preferring to keep frustration to himself. He can end up accepting the
other's wish, because he does not know how to say “no” - as part of avoiding conflicts. The
absence of conflicts is only maintained by renouncing life, leading to vital restriction and
reduction of growth potential.

Arrogance
Arrogance is one of the main characteristics of the social E5, as he seeks in knowledge the
affirmation of his self-importance. It is difficult for the social E5 to renounce his own theories.
This subtype holds a professorial attitude of one who is always teaching. The social E5
disparages ordinary life and ordinary people. Arrogance is a compensation for low self-esteem
and fragile self-worth. Absorbed in his own world, the social E5 presents an attitude of not
caring and not needing the other.

Restrained greed and abundance

The mind of the social E5 is not oriented to abundance. This subtype lives with little, with a kind
of taboo on greed. Fighting for his own wishes requires energy he does not want to waste. The
social E5 prefers to find justifications for not committing himself and convincing himself that he
does not need anything.

Feeling of internal impoverishment

This subtype feels a sense of lack. They were not sufficiently nourished by maternal warmth. His
idealizations reinforce the sense of inadequacy, because compared to the ideal, he is devalued
and diminished all the time.

Stinginess
The social E5 is stingy with the other and with himself. They do not realize what they need. They
have given up, learning to endure great deprivation. There are great difficulties with being
empathetic, and with recognizing the needs of the other.

Autistic traits
The social E5 lives sheltered in his inner world, living in the abstract. He does not know how to
communicate, and can live with great anguish without anyone knowing. There is a tendency to
become solitary and hermetic. Being very sensitive, the social E5 defends himself to the
maximum from external stimuli. Being so indifferent to the world, there is a great attachment to
the self. In extreme cases, psychiatry gives us the cases of autism and catatonia.

If the E4 are so intense, that this makes them very differentiated or contrasting characters, the
E5, on the other hand, in their usual lack of intensity, appear to us as more difficult to
differentiate between them. In reference to the passion of social E5, Ichazo used the word totem,
which I find very evocative, a good image. But the passion of the social E5 is something similar
to the need for the essential, the sublime, we could say, instead of the need for what there is.

Totem indicates both height and the character of being a constructed object rather than a human
being. The height of a totem evokes a tendency of these people to look up, towards the ideal, and
to relate to the most outstanding and prominent among people, something like Midas wanted
everything he touched to turn to gold. The tragedy is that, by seeking the social E5 a super value,
it implicitly despises ordinary life and ordinary people. He is only interested in the quintessence
of life, the elixir of existence, the ultimate meaning. But in this orientation towards the stars he
becomes someone who is little interested in life here below...

He becomes, therefore, too spiritual, since affective impoverishment, which moves away from
compassion, is precisely contrary to spiritual achievement. Thus, in this character, a polarity is
established between the extraordinary and what does not make sense, so that nothing makes
sense until the extraordinary or magical is reached.

One of the first things to come to light is the abandonment of a dull, depressed mode of being in
the world. A kind of sadness, of opacity, is lost, which makes things the same and repetitive,
without a future, without a project. You lose that kind of laziness that has little to do with a
natural rhythm that allows you to enjoy life and that is related, instead, to the difficulty of feeling
and perceiving stimuli, and responding to them. The muffler effect disappears, which serves to
muffle perceptions, and through which, for example, we realize only a posteriori the emotions
we feel. What's more: in some cases there is an excess of sensitivity and susceptibility. You react
with more force and spontaneity; with less ambiguity; with less need for rebellion; with less
resentment; and aggressiveness is experienced.

The emotional charge ended up in the inconspicuous but active box of resentment, which was
often expressed in an indirect and veiled way, and almost never at the right time. The habit of
swallowing everything is lost and it is easier to deal with rough situations or those that cause
discomfort. There is no longer an effort to avoid or to hide.

Perceptions arrived muffled. Awareness of the stimulus came much later. As if in a remote time
of life the need had been felt to muffle the emotion for fear of its excessive load. There followed
an indecision in behavior that manifested itself through hidden doubt and pretending that nothing
is happening.

The crazy idea consists in preferring not to feel: ―Nothing happens here, and if it happens, I put
up with it and hide it, even from myself. It is then that the five put on a poker face, as if
everything were slipping away from him and he was above good and evil, in such a way that he
neither feels nor suffers. What happens is that the five decided at a very early age to lock his
heart in a trunk so as not to suffer and throw the key to the bottom of the sea‖, says Miguel.
Navigating in an area of poorly defined relationships, in which things could be done but are not
done, an answer could be given that is not da, and you're not sure you feel what you feel. A
feeling of suspension in which, to pass the time, we give ourselves over to activities such as
being in front of the television or the computer, unwillingly, without realizing that we are killing
the energy that we carry inside.

● - feeling of being in limbo

● - less reaction time between what I think and what I express
● - deeply insecure about what he perceives and realizes it very slowly, so he puts
everything off
● - importance to the approval of others
● - time spent on internal dialogue
● - laps are the result of an attempt at self-manipulation that leads nowhere.
● - the result of fear or feeling inadequate and uncomfortable in certain situations
● - may think it’s better to be alone
● - identification with the bad breast or with the one that did not exist
● - imagine ourselves alone in life and does not give space to encounters, coexistence and
family
● - idea of sentimental solitude and the fantasy of the single
● - fantasy that our mysterious and inaccessible image can really serve to establish
relationships.
● - eternal being on the sidelines, in purity, in irreproachability and in nothingness
● - does not take care of our basic needs, physical and emotional, with quality.
● - disconnected from physical society
● - not present in daily life
● - approach to life manifested through thought
● - may not see the value of the friendship relationship
● - understanding other ways of life may be unwelcomed
● - idea of being in the truth
● - afraid to show and share the affection you feel
● - not prepared for something human, deeply human
● - locked up in the ivory tower of the totem, even excited, hypnotized and devoted to it
● - the perception of dissatisfaction is added, sometimes, the deep experience of despair
● - obsessive ideas that invaded my mind
● - unaware of body
- dispensing with the intensity of emotions

Doubts about whether to continue collecting, out of habit, transcendent wisdom that can lead to
some kind of profound health or, on the contrary, intuitively more than rationally, give up
finding that ancient non-existent treasure.
―I do not seek the extraordinary to extricate myself from everyday and real life. I don't
substitute human emotions and experiences for ‗mega-intellectual handjobs‘ or for ‗supernatural
shots‘, and above all I don't believe them... I don't believe my fantasies either,‖ says Marian.

The perception of dissatisfaction is added, sometimes, the deep experience of despair: when it is
seen that everything that has been built — and often on ground that at some point had been solid
— begins to crumble as after an earthquake, you can live a moment of cosmic despair. You don't
know what to do, you don't know where to go, any movement seems to aggravate the situation
and there is no way out.

Pain that has been contained for a long time emerges and expresses itself in unpredictable,
sometimes violent and vindictive ways. At the moment in which this experience of emotional
and rational dismemberment is going through, we cannot even imagine that it could be useful
and that it represents the rupture of an egoic scheme that leaves open the way to new possibilities
of interior reconstruction and new states of consciousness.

When we are in the dark, other unforeseen existential modalities of being in the world are
activated, new possibilities are discovered and, above all, we become aware of what deeply
constitutes us. At that time, the small flame of meditation, friendship with friends and teacher,
and trust in the process helped to overcome many difficulties.

He had to disconnect from the intensity of his emotions and then continue down this path due to
automatic laziness or mental fear of exposing himself to other foreseeable catastrophic events,
the path of integration is the master road to psycho-emotional health.

For a person who grew up with the fear of being invaded, the encounter with his peers becomes a
litmus test: it is what he most seeks and of which he has an extreme need, and what he fears the
most due to the disorders that it can cause.

Unable to see how much of the need for love, sexuality, eroticism and affection that was missing
was put elsewhere, it was displaced in a search for spirituality. It was as if there was an
eroticization of the spiritual, of the extraordinary.

When I felt myself explode and saw the fragments of my personality moving away from each
other, the level of loneliness and despair was so high that I would not have been able to go
through that difficult time - which lasted a long time, several years - if I had not felt the spacious
quality of his presence, if I hadn't had confidence that somehow I could find protection in him,
and if I hadn't sensed that he could help me because he understood without prejudice what I was
going through.
The social E5 is very invested in self-improvement and is therefore naturally inclined toward
inner work. However, it is surprising to see how the fruit of a work that is often disciplined and
ethically motivated can be contaminated by the vanity of a self that is dissatisfied with its own
image in so many other spheres of life. ―Look how good I am... what experiences I am capable
of achieving‖, is something we have all said to ourselves more than once. However, the
psychospiritual path already traveled is and continues to be a plowed field in which to sow.

For the social E5 that burns with the desire to seek, it is essential to discover the possibility of
relaxing, without making the efforts that often serve to align with an ideal of behavior and image.

E5- Sexual
Fragile body in a nonconformist spirit
With sexual children, it is common to hear stories of a first childhood of suffering, not only due
to the emotional impact of the parents but also due to physical fragility.

One person recounts that at the age of ten months he suffered from a severe allergy, which
almost led to his death, due to spoiled powdered milk. Breast milk had been withdrawn at three
months, and there was inaugurated little physical contact and a life marked by illness.

These reports of early loss of contact with the mother associated with the experience of being
very close to death are common. Thinkers of this subtype like Wordsworth and Rousseau lost
their mothers when they were still children. And both the French thinker and Chopin had
childhoods marked by illness and closeness to death. The Polish musician and his sister were
taken, as children, by a very strong flu, which resulted in her death. From then on, for Chopin, it
was as if death was always at his side.

In the same proportion as this physical fragility, there is an intense desire for power: the sexual
E5 does not accept his fragile condition.

In need of harmony, to flee to nature

Since contact with the other destabilizes the sexual E5, an inhospitable environment can be
lethal. The person of this character, due to his fear of being swallowed, needs the contact to
translate into a harmonious environment. The aforementioned Chopin from an early age isolated
himself to play the piano and, in the end, as there was harmony in George Sand's house, he
enjoyed a happy and productive life. Sand was more of a mother to Chopin than a lover, and she
hardly demanded of him.

The sexual E5 finds much of this harmony in contact with nature, his divine muse, with whom,
yes, he maintains a unilateral relationship, favored by the silence of his inspirer. He will also
seek a refuge in nature to organize his inner chaos. Nature becomes the idealized 'woman' or
'man', where she believes she will find answers to her questions.
“This was how I managed to forget the chaos of my family life and "empty" some of the passion
I felt for a girl.” – Alexandre V.

Arid and at the same time hypersensitive

Given its retention, when a sexual E5 tries to express himself authentically, what he finds is very
dry. Alongside the disconnection of feeling, there is the idea that to feel is to explode, to lose
oneself, perhaps even to die. And at the same time, it presents a hypersensitivity that does not
coincide with its arid and distant appearance, a by-product of the low vitality of the body and
spirit.

“If I am very open to what is happening around me, I suffer a lot. I spare myself that sensitivity
with a neck split that separates my emotions from thought.” – Mara G.
In fact, such a low threshold for physical and emotional pain is the backdrop for an almost
deserted posture of feeling. The sexual Five prefers not to enter a field that can evoke their most
primal pains. And this is how aridity and hypersensitivity feed off each other. It is as if there was
an extreme pain somewhere in himself that, if revived, he could not bear and would pay with his
life.

Easily destabilized
The feeling that his resources are so scarce leads him to succumb to the other. Anyone who
appears in his way tactfully makes him lose with his own desires. The other destabilizes the
sexual E5.

”I lose myself in front of the other. I withdraw from my internal axis; I find myself facing
external demands that exhaust me and I feel the need to isolate myself to recharge my batteries.
It is my need for solitude.” – Mara G.

The person of this character was so invaded in his childhood that even today he lives with the
feeling of that exposure -and the weakness to defend himself- and stays in the rear so that they do
not invade him too much in a phagocytizing contact.

Nostalgic
Nostalgia has tied the sexual E5, stagnant by an excessive attachment to the past that prevents
him from assuming responsibility for his life and moving forward. He lives in the nostalgia of
enlightened times that no longer exist, and perhaps did not even exist, full of idealizations.
He finds no joy in living, no lightness in being sexual, no brilliance. He doesn't indulge in
playfulness; he doesn't play and he doesn't value little things (because they don't belong to the
divine sphere).
“Nostalgia, eternal nostalgia that always consumed me," he said Chopin, who had lived in Paris
from a very young age, but people from Poland were always the source of his images and pen
feelings. "Twilight": that's what they called the states of mood of the composer.

Helpless
Existential helplessness is present from childhood.
“Sometimes I was playing and suddenly the world disappeared under my feet. I lost ground. It
was sudden and brief but I felt extremely lonely.” – Alexandre V.
“Helplessness seems so common to me that I feel as if it were covering me. It's like having no
skin.” – Mara G.

Does not assert its place in the world

One of the consequences of his psychic split is the neglect of the social and professional
dimensions, where he is doomed to a routine and simple life. The desire for external freedom, a
reflection of the lack of internal freedom, cannot be satisfied and is then transformed into the
opposite features of systematicity and rigidity, similar to those of the E1. He has succumbed to
the neurosis of financial security and the comfort of an institution, while remaining with a
boiling heart and excessive fantasy as compensation for a routine life, as well as a desire to
always go somewhere else.

Until the age of forty-six, ten years before he died, Nietzsche worked hard in solitude and
anonymity. He pressed himself cruelly because he could no longer bear his lack of recognition.
Just like Rousseau, at thirty-eight still a "nobody," as he was called. Inside there was an
indomitable spirit, but he had not been able to affirm his place in the world.
“At the moments when I realize how much I closed my life off from friendships and from my
work, which is the reality from which I was fleeing, through refuge and fantasy. In the end, I
ended up doing little concretely, and when I look back a "feeling of urgency" comes over me. It's
like looking back and seeing a gap between what I'm being right now and what I've been in my
life, with a lack of "continuity." I realize that I lived in a kind of “forgetfulness” of myself and
that now that this is the case I have to run. And again, there is a very strong call to enter the
world of fantasy and inactivity, as if everything was already lost.” – Alexandre V.

Worthless
An outstanding trait of Greed is not feeling worthy, due to a lack of vitality to face challenges.
This, in the sexual instinct, coexists with excessive and grandiose fantasy. The result: unrealistic
and unfinished projects. The E5 sexual easily renounces his life projects. «I rarely completed
what I set out to do», «I never delved into anything I did».
An abyss of oblivion opens between planning and acting: a great gap between fantasy and action.
In his thinking, he manages to maintain a level of motivation that, when heading towards the
sphere of action, is lost. A great distance is perceived between what he wanted and what, for the
moment, he is ready to carry out. It is another result of psychic and bodily splitting and
fragmentation.

Undisciplined
Here is another trait that contributes to this state of inaction. From thought to action, motivation
and determination disappear and thus a disciplined life is difficult.
An indiscipline that is also the result of forgetfulness and de-vitalization. Operates here, the
irrational idea of not being able to complete a stage of your life and move on, because
"completion" means letting go and opening up to the new. To which is added that internal
mechanism that prevents him from seeing any of his rights (minimizing his desires), in addition
to a perfectionism that makes him believe that he is never ready. Deep down, the sexual E5 feels
like a son who is not allowed to separate from his mother, which reveals his false autonomy.

Vengeful; not doing what is expected

The psychodynamics of withdrawal include a subtle but effective act of rebellion. Sometimes it
is an act of revenge against the demands of that internalized, hypercritical and severe mother,
with her perennial: "You don't finish anything you start!". The result of this conflict between
internal demands and the rebellion of not doing is guilt and failure.

Guilty feeling
Feeling guilty for a sexual E5 is closely linked to the awareness that their isolation is a form of
revenge, of aggression. Guilt leads him, therefore, to resign himself.
“Perhaps my most frequent feeling of guilt is about not having energy. I blame myself for it and
that takes away my energy to act, it's a vicious circle. I realize that guilt is a way of maintaining
the feeling of victimization, of keeping myself small.” – Maria Luisa F.
A childhood full of demands and messages of undervaluation, and of feeling undeserving, is
common:
“Everything my mother gave me came with guilt. When she gave me a toy or clothes, she would
say, "I stopped giving it to myself to give it to you!" These messages corroborated the feeling of
poverty, scarcity and, above all, that of not being worthy of something positive in life. I perceive
any change in my partner's mood as if it were against me, because of me. So, I react like a child
or a teenager: I shut myself in and isolate myself, and I feel even more guilty about that
estrangement.” – Alexandre V.

Selfish and self-centered

By idealizing the partner, or the one with whom he has an affective relationship, the sexual E5
does not see him as a different person from him, with his own emotions and needs. You need a
partner who shows extreme loyalty to your way of life (the idealization of trust). The other is
someone who has to conform to him totally so that he can feel that there is love. And, above all,
be always available, even guessing what you want; in the end, a mirror that reflects your image.
The very organization of the activities or of the time will have to be in accordance with its
rhythm; Only then will the other be a true reliable ally.

Arrogant
He can deny the defensiveness of isolation, convincing himself that his is a special world, that he
himself is special and therefore cannot be in relationship with "ordinary" beings. It is about his
difficulty behind that image of superiority or unattainable person. And he closes himself in his
world of ideas, convinced that he understands something subtle that others do not have the ability
to perceive. In the confrontation with the other, he tends to present his ideas as unquestionable,
and feels entitled to correct others.

Seductiveness
This sexual subtype conquers with an erotic seduction without a display of feathers or a sexually
attractive image according to this passion; rather, he gets closer in an intimate way, sending
messages of interest and with the physical closeness of a contact that can even be delicate.
Obviously, he can use mental attunement or interest in the intellectual but, in any case, among
the E5 subtypes he is the most sensually daring.
Your search for the ideal partner can make you compulsively seduce different people at the same
time. He is very adept at not taking a clear initiative; Rather, he weaves a web into which the
other person falls. This strategy avoids direct rejection and hides his relational awkwardness;
Above all, this way he controls his fear of intimacy and the instinctive impulse.
Acting from the compartmentalization, maintaining different relationships at the same time,
finally allows him not to enter into emotional chaos or the guilt of the betrayal. Many sexual E5
admit to being unfaithful with a certain “easiness”, just as they withdraw or disappear if the
relationship no longer pleases them or it creates problems for them.

Romantic
The sexual E5 is the most emotional of the E5. Romanticism is the way in which he allows
himself to be carried away by emotions. More than in the couple relationship, although also,
romanticism emerges in contact with music, art or nature. It's easier when listening to music to
feel your heartbeat or surrender to abandonment, something. that would be experienced as very
dangerous in the human relationship.

The word trust would be the basic issue for the sexual five. Among them there are many poets or
artists. Nijinsky was such a five. He had an extreme expressiveness, but cut in many ways. If you
try to find the difference between the sexual E5 and the other subtypes of the five, it will not be
easy. But if you go into conversation with them, you'll hear them say that they feel very
passionate about a person; usually about a person they can't find in their lives.

Here occurs a case similar to the extraordinary in the search for the social five — the
extraordinary would be what is at the top of the totem pole: the sexual E5 seeks a very tall
exemplar. The same goes for love: this subtype is on a quest for absolute love, and their quest is
so strong that if you are the one being sought, it is very difficult to pass the test. If someone is
looking for the absolute, it is very easy for him to be disappointed.

We have to understand this passionate search in the sense of trust, of being able to trust the other:
the sexual E5 is looking for that person who will be for him and with him, regardless of how or
what, far beyond normal vows of an engagement or marriage. The thought of the sexual five is
that he has to be able to present himself to you with the worst of his inner world, and that you, as
his partner, should maintain complete equanimity in the face of his inner monsters, since he
loves you so much… So he lives the love of a couple as a kind of ideal, but it is an ideal that
does not exist in the world of humans.

The sexual E5 is quite romantic — this is the minus five of the E5s. They can be very similar to
the other five until you hit the romantic point: then a vibrant inner life will be awakened. Chopin
can be a good example of it. Who if not the most romantic among composers? Chopin was more
of an aristocrat. He was a bit stiff. Someone who knew him quite well—Liszt's mistress—said of
him that she was like an oyster with icing: he wasn't very open, he wasn't open to deep intimacy,
except with one or two people in his life. Chopin came from Poland and came to France as a
teenager, but he did not make any new friends in France. He was in the center of high society,
and his whole sentimental life was replaced by music.

Ennea-type five characters live in an internal world in which reason and objectivity are king. At
the same time, we believe in unconditional love as a fantastic aspiration, and we think of
ourselves as having the capacity to give it, just as we hope to find a person who will take us out
of our isolation and dryness. And so we can live indefinitely, while we observe what happens
around us in a detached way.

We isolate ourselves, we do not expect anything from others and we do not trust life; both people
and life itself constitute a cosmos located behind a glass that separates us from everything. From
there we observe what happens outside as something foreign to us out of fear and guilt of
existing. On the one hand, we experience any relationship with the outside as threatening, which
in the best of cases will cause us pain. At the same time, deep down, we feel guilty when
interacting with others because we feel that we can get in their way. We believe that if we don't
need and we are self-sufficient we can subsist, and that way they won't hurt us and we won't. We
experience the emotional world as threatening and complicated, as something we can do without,
since it causes displeasure. Therefore, we prefer not to get emotionally involved and remain in
the role of observers of life. This same non-involvement gives us a certain emotional infantilism
and at the same time an inhibited hypersensitivity, since we do not put our own emotions into
practice.
In family relationships, there is usually a disconnection with the parents: the sexual five does not
feel connected to them, and this disconnection coexists with a dependency out of necessity. In
many cases the bond with the mother has not existed or has been broken, in others it has been a
cold bond or has been experienced as aggressive. The wound in the bond usually occurs in the
first months of life, when the baby has not yet established the differentiation between the world
and himself through the maternal bond.

The sexual five has closed in on himself, creating a safe internal world, full of ideas, theories,
romantic fantasies and utopias about the search for unconditional love. In this way, it is separated
from the outside world, which lives as dangerous and full of obstacles before which it is better
not to show oneself, to inhibit oneself emotionally and wait for the right person to appear with
whom we can exist and show ourselves as we are, since she, in our fantasy will accept us
unconditionally and we will then be able to live, with the security obtained, everything that we
do not dare to live in the world. Waiting for that encounter, the only time we allow ourselves to
be ourselves is when we are alone, feeling isolated in everyday life.

Our fantasy is that we hope to be able to be and dare to love when the partner who understands
us finally appears. In this way, we believe that we can be ourselves totally, and we can become
very demanding with the other, given the extreme expectations placed on him. That person is an
idealization and, as such, it is impossible for him to exist. At the beginning of a relationship, it
can be felt that the other is everything, but as it progresses, it is seen that the person is human,
with the consequent frustration, before which we inhibit ourselves emotionally with the
consequent isolation. Until basic relationship and affection needs accumulate that demand to be
satisfied and must be channeled again. Then someone chosen is sought to tell confidences to or a
new partner is sought to start over.

We E5s feel neurotically different and we want to be different: a difference that happens because
we don't feel the same emotions as others and we don't move in life due to thirst for power and
consumerist desires. We have given up being and existing as a way of surviving, we have given
up showing our feelings. We try to give up our needs as well, prioritizing knowledge as a way to
control life. Thus, emotional non-dependence is guaranteed, except for that of the partner, in this
case being an exaggerated dependency.

Unable to realize the existence of an internal world in which one lives detached from reality,
both in romantic fantasies of finding unconditional love and in catastrophic fantasies about what
can happen if one falls apart.

Cannot leave the world of reason and you can give way to sensation, to the recognition of needs,
to be able to feel as an integral part of the world, without having so much need for isolation.

● - fear and guilt of existing

 ● - may be unable to externalize what is happening to us and feeling, finding the right to be
as we are
● - judgmental with ourselves
● - may not understand that the risk of feeling can be acceptable and that living with more
emotion can lead to pleasant results
● - may not be able to sustain the emptiness of not knowing and daring to feel, taking
charge of our own lives along the path that we want, without prior determination.
● - may have trouble with a clear ability to communicate with others: set and remove limits
● - trouble with emotional expression
● - does not have a connection with the body

E5 - Self-Preservation
Retentiveness
This subtype has learned to be self-sufficient, since he does not expect much from the world.
They stick to themselves, being pessimistic about receiving care and protection, or being able to
take what they need.

Not giving
This subtype has the fantasy that, by giving, it will lose what little it has. The conservation E5
fears commitment, since it implies a debt that he does not feel capable of satisfying. He wants to
be completely free, without obstacles, without ties to anyone. They do not feel like they have
much to give.

Detachment
The conservation E5 withdraws from the world; detachment is a form of withdrawal. They do
not feel the need to relate, nor are they interested. Deep down, they fear not being capable of
filling the other's expectations.

Fear of being swallowed

The conservation E5 has the most difficulty with setting limits of the E5 subtypes. He feels used
and abused, confirming his disappointment with the world. Anger is not expressed, rather, this
subtype chooses to disappear. They protect their private space as much as possible, being
susceptible to invasion.

Excessively docile
Over-docility leads this subtype to interfere with his own spontaneity and with his preferences.
This over-docility would not be possible without a strongly repressed need for love.

Self-sufficient
The conservation E5 is independent, due to the fear of being swallowed, and due to the belief
that he does not have much to give. He does not ask for help; the world is not to be trusted. This
mistrust originated from the primary relationship with the caregivers, who did not respond
adequately to the person. Experiencing great frustration when not being able to support others,
the conservation E5 chooses to retire from relationships. Despite his self-sufficiency, his material
life is often lacking, because he does not need much either. This subtype can choose low-paying
jobs because he values independence above all else.

Emotionally insensitive
Despite being sensitive, the conservation E5 buries his emotions, and nobody knows about them.
He has “learned” that what happens to him is not relevant, and that showing emotions will cause
discomfort. He can forget how he feels, leading to anhedonia. It is difficult to express emotions.

Orientation to knowledge
Knowledge becomes a safeguard in the face of the world. It can be a way of relating to the other.
Knowledge brings order and analysis to chaos. Everything is safer in the mind, where he is
completely free and autonomous.

Strangeness
Suppressing feelings and avoiding life impoverishes the experiences of the conservation E5. He
feels empty on the inside. He describes it as an existential desert. This feeling of living dead is
due to the disconnection with the body and the emotions. It is also a feeling of strangeness that
makes him feel lost, like a weirdo on the planet. He does not feel belonging to this world.

Guilt
The conservation E5 feels guilt for existing, as if he did not deserve life, as if his existence was a
mistake. This subtype will blame himself for everything. By embracing a detached indifference,
they feel guilty. Guilt can manifest as a vague sense of inferiority, a vulnerability to intimidation,
and shyness.

Self-demanding
This subtype is a perfectionist who feels like a “loser.” He is very demanding of himself, and
over-analyzing his actions leads to a sense of lack.

Negativism
The conservation E5 is an oppositionist and a rebel on the inside. His anger manifests as passive-
aggression. They can be forgetful and evasive. He does not like being told what to do.

Hypersensitivity
Hypersensitivity is an introverted disposition. This subtype feels unprotected against
environmental stimuli. Emotional numbness is a way to protect against overstimulation. He does
not want to interfere with the world; he does not want to harm or interfere. The most obvious
manifestation of sensitivity and compassion will be towards nature and animals.

Renunciation of action
The conservation E5 tends to procrastinate. Inaction can manifest as non-commitment, passivity,
and apathy. Inaction can be the result of wanting to keep his intentions hidden.

The need to retreat is a clear characteristic for the conservation five. But keep in mind that every
E5 subtype has some of that: some need to retreat. In the case of conservation, the passion has a
lot to do with finding refuge, erecting high walls that separate you from a world that can invade
you, that can take you out of a precious little world that hides inside you. The idea of self
preservation becomes clearer if we imagine them as strong supporters of cave retreat.

The E5 conservation extremely limits his needs and desires, since each desire could mean a
dependency status for him. Like each conservation subtype, this one is also linked to survival
and to the concrete, attached to objects and personal space; but like E5, which is the most mental
of the mental characters, it is in thought, in incessant reflection on how to survive and live by
limiting external disturbances, that it finds the greatest refuge.

● - vindictive attitude towards the world, which manifests itself with separateness
● - victimized self-image that judges the world as hostile, inadequate, hypocritical,
ignorant, brutal, etc
● - An ideal built of visions of wisdom and deep and elevated knowledge, of greatness, of
overwhelming force, of power, even omnipotence
● - Appearing invisible, playing deaf, that was a way of hiding from my own feeling of
discomfort, of perceiving myself as a coward, a fearful person who, at any sign of threat,
ran to hide inside the house.
● - great attachment they have to their own intuitions, ideas or deductions, and the
impoverishment of clinging to them, closing off to other points of view
● - There may be a lack of interest, an oversight, eating just to eat. Other times, compulsive
eating may occur to fill the void
● - great lack of interest towards people in general, for example, to waste time meeting
someone who is not interesting for something.
● - freezing and rationalization or intellectualization
● - unassertive that sometimes it is difficult for him to even understand what he is
● - the fear of generating expectations in others is so great that there is an intentional
concealment of oneself
● - a lot of attachment and emotional transference to certain personal objects
● - ―taking risks, for what?‖, ―it is not worth it‖, are the usual thoughts
● - fear that you will not be able to achieve what you want
 ● - may be unable to identify your own desires and needs and give way to action to achieve
at least some of them and feel what happens with it.
● - trouble asking loudly and speaking clearly
● - may not have developed empathy
● - masculinity or femininity, as appropriate, which are so suppressed by such little
experience of your instinctive part

The conflict is experienced internally and it is necessary to see the tributes that this entails. On
the one hand, the price is self-injury by internalizing rage, internal anger. Also, killing the other
internally: the interior head cutter. It is helpful to recognize the mechanism by which, in the face
of what is perceived as a particularly painful aggression, a great deal of resentment develops
internally, which, however, the Conservation Five is hardly allowed to express outwardly. The
most common consequence of this resentment is a withdrawal reaction that can be linked to
certain actions if the safe space itself is threatened. Resentment is a constant and at some point
you need to see to what extent an attachment to it occurs. So much so, that this attachment leads
to an internalized vengeful attitude. A testimony can clarify such a process.

A typical way of experiencing the conflict is to inhibit the response, sometimes changing it for
the opposite behavior to what is felt. Thus, for example, when someone unexpectedly shows an
aggressive and demanding attitude with a five conservation, he may accept what is required of
him to escape the pressure, but at the same time he will begin to feel a sense of rage against
himself, inside himself, for not having reacted in a way more in accordance with his wishes,
displacing the action.

Hyper-adaptability manifests itself, for example, in a compulsive way of saying yes to an

external demand, if the refusal may be uncomfortable or lead to conflict, and in saying what one
thinks the other person wants to hear. The change consists in seeing to what extent this implies a
betrayal of oneself and leads to giving up the satisfaction of one's own needs.

The tendency to anesthetize, forgetfulness and mental confusion is another notable trait of this
character. Working on attention and intention at the moment things happen is a good way to
counteract this tendency. There is an internal idea of not wearing yourself out by paying attention
to things that are trivial for you and a resistance to remembering these kinds of things. In
addition, the very habit of being disconnected makes it difficult to be fully aware of what is
happening around you. Information is lost and then the action becomes clumsy.

Not wasting time is an obsession. There is in E5 conservation a passion for taking advantage of
time but without a clearly defined purpose, it is rather a diffuse thing with which he connects
when he is ―wasting time‖.
This character needs to see to what extent he feels attached to safe objects and places, until he
manages to transfer his affective ties to them. Something similar also happens with the few
relationships that he establishes: although he has little awareness of his attachment to them, in
reality he feels a great attachment and possessiveness.

When the anger so characteristic of the conservation five enters the scene, consisting of
punishing in silence, not speaking, pouting, etc., it is about becoming aware of the inner
discomfort that it causes and experiencing other ways of reacting. For example, sharing what you
have been feeling can be very liberating.

E6- Social
Fear is chronic in the social E6. Fear of what? Fear of life, rejection, anger, conflict, shame,
humiliation, to manifest, to be. The "mundification," the encounter with the environment, is a
movement plagued by inhibitory episodes. The environment becomes annihilating, alienating.

Alienation
The “fearful” personality of social anchoring howls: “I get out of myself, my desires and needs,
to capture your expectations,” “I focus on what you want from me,” and “I become what you
expect from me.”

In short, “I am you, I am what you have to be. I become alien to myself and find you adapting,
normalizing me and adjusting to what the world expects of me.” One participant shared these
introjected messages: “Never be like your father.” “It was one of the phrases that my mother
repeated to me during my childhood. I gave up the father to earn her gaze and her approval.”
Very normative and demanding, her love was conditional: “If you behave badly I won't love
you,” “be obedient to your mother.” The list of introjects pointing in the same direction would be
endless. “I remember as a constant the environment of judicious tension and little acceptance of
my mother towards my father. In this text I lost myself, I was devoured. Today is the day I
remember my father as a character that is not entirely real, a fictional character, like in a story.”

Personal power is relegated to adherence to the norm and submission to authority. The
annihilation of the vital permission to decide from one's own sovereignty culminates in the fear
of freedom. He renounces the instinctive in the face of lofty ideals, in an “exit from himself” to
become a “foreigner” of himself.

The everyday
Let us point out at the outset a contradictory global tone where either an obsessive rigidity
appears, or an alternation of order and relatively precise management with the chaotic.
Anxiety and doubtful rumination. The turbulent anxiety, restlessness, alertness is omnipresent in
everyday life. Do not trust the course of events: some catastrophic event will happen. Chronic
doubt is added to this paranoid ideation, since the decision does not spring from self-listening,
from the connection with the intimate space, but from the anxious question of what is the correct
option.

There is a lack of permission to explore, to make mistakes (natural learning process: trial and
error). Inhibition due to fear of not complying with what is expected generates chronic
rumination.

Chronophobia
Time is experienced as a persecutory presence. The “materiality,” the daily issues, are
experienced with little lightness. The practical aspects, the economics, the food, come into
friction with lofty ideals, and entail an internal experience of time covered in anguish. To arrive,
not to arrive, how to arrive... Time management is conflictive, lacking in fluency. The clocks
become heartbeats of demand.

Retentivity
Expenditure is often conflictive, with guilt and a propensity for austerity, sobriety, and
moderation, from messages in education and vital attitudes captured in the family atmosphere.
Retentivity is a security handle.

This position is reinforced by the focus on the imperishable. We observe an enormous difference
between the habits associated with the worldly and with the elevated; between the fleeting,
secondary and superfluous, and the ideal. Many of the allowed expenses are guaranteed to be
“excellent” or durable: books, studies, travel, music, art, family needs, obligations, and work.

In one of the meetings, a mother commented that she did not allow her son to go on the
graduation trip. He was the only one in her class who stayed home, despite being one of the best
academically. “It seemed to me a superfluous expense for his thirteen years. And he had not yet
done any special merit, beyond his obligation.”

Metaphysical attitude and Taboo of egoism

A “metaphysical” varnish, together with the propensity for sobriety, gradually forges a chronic
attitude of austerity that results in daily renunciations.

In many cases a blockage of permission appears: the absence of the right to “give oneself” or, at
least, clear difficulties, in a clear collision between “ascetic ideals” and aspects considered
superficial, banal.
The image, food (sometimes verging on carelessness, if it is not for the people close to them) and
other daily material aspects are placed on a relegated, devalued, or ignored rung.

Norm and Mimicry

A certain adaptability and mimicry in daily habits to related groups or in intimate bonds makes
their customs more flexible, beyond maintaining the tone of characteristic austerity and sobriety.

A colleague admits: “I'm never in the habit of having a beer, olives, or wine for pleasure when I
get home from work. It seems frivolous to me. I just feel like I don't need it. However, when I
am in a bar with a group of friends or colleagues, from time to time I make the effort and go
ahead and invite them. Not as a reason to celebrate something, but under the fear of rejection, of
not being accepted or loved. Or to adapt to the customs of that group.”

This metaphysics in customs, this “asceticism” that greatly idealizes certain values, dissociating
them from the mundane, ends up excluding or minimizing the enjoyment of everyday life. Thus,
there is a “freezing” of one's own needs, because they are considered

capricious or frivolous, and due to the absence of law, which penalizes banal expenses. The
result is automation, a cold austerity, and a rigid and forced sobriety.

There are family messages of renunciation and systemic aspects in which the death of loved ones
and dark unconscious links imply dead experiences.

There is also a curious difference between the attitude of sober and self-sacrificing, and generous
behaviors that lead to resignations (especially in intimate relationships).

There is an imbalance between the “heroic” overexertion, the energy expenditure, and the
gratifications received and accepted, digested. Underlies an affective desert, an emotional
distance, and a chronic value dissatisfaction.

The castled Sisyphus, in the titanic wear of him, strives endlessly for ideals of family protection
and for Dulcineas. A post-paternal or maternal unfolding varnishes some inhibited love and
dedication from the heart.

Rigidity
In the field of power, a series of chronic attitudes can be seen, both with regard to external and
internal aspects. In an internal world with oversized evaluative and normative aspects, the
posture is one of vital rigidity, with a lack of spontaneity and natural expressiveness, as well as
rigor and commitment to measure.

Uniformity and Uniforms

There is in the social E6 a secret fascination with the supreme, total force. Totems of united
voices, uniformed and uniform steps, a unified ideal. Uniformity of criteria. Without fissures,
without lacerating doubts. Certainty with the value of faith.

Omnipotence and Impotence

The distressing insecurity of this character and its connection with the radical fragility of one's
position in the universe generate sudden movements from powerlessness to omnipotence. The
shift of power towards strong leaders, lofty ideals, totems, and concepts is generating a co-
participation covered in the search for omnipotence and rebellion against vulnerability.

“It is important for me to have a leader to follow and also that I like power, being close to people
who have power, now I am close to two people I admire, Dr. Claudio Naranjo and Dr. Fernando
Flores. One is in Being and the other in Doing, both seem brilliant to me, they are geniuses and I
enjoy being close to them. I realize that I have a facility for approaching people who have power.
There I do not doubt, I am not afraid; on the contrary: it gives me security to believe that I have
those pillars.”

The social E6, due to its hypersensitivity to possible rejections, comes into conflict when
expressing itself freely. He is afraid of attracting attention in a way that could be embarrassing,
reprehensible, or conflictive for the group or the leaders (bosses, teachers...).

The episodes of invasions where individuality was castrated are repeated in the stories, in the
family group, the church, the school, and in social situations where freedom of expression was
abusively compressed.

A high moral load and demand transfers personal energy and power to adaptation to the
environment. The affective and relational deficiencies have been compensated with adaptive
postures. The social E6 exercises control as a vigilant attitude: It sets in motion its radar, its
“lookout,” hunting and capturing whatever rules of operation are in force.

The high presence of “oughtisms,” of internalized demands, the attitude of adherence to external
regulations, implies submission towards that “other” (authority, group, or totemic ideal) that
displaces the gravitational center of the person, who suffers a mismatch, a misalignment.

One of the participants in the meeting comments: “At the time when I worked in a major
consulting multinational, my fall into a pit of personal crisis, rather than professional, was
recurrent. The strict rules of behavior and image, me clad in impeccable suits, obedience to the
directives of superiors and the panic of making mistakes in decision making made me repeatedly
ask myself: “Who am I? What do I do here?” I had no answer. I felt totally annihilated as a
human being. Then came the professional crisis; no matter how interesting the projects were, I
was not a person.”
The displacement of one's own strength towards people or groups magnetized by certainty,
protection, inclusion, and belonging, calms the underlying anguish. We can thus observe
behaviors of absolute fidelity to the company, the team, the tribe, the leader, the boss. From this
position emerges the obsessive, exhaustive compliance, the demand, and the inhibition of critical
attitudes. The suppression of rebellion also appears, in the form of self-invalidation, hostility
directed against oneself, etc.

The omnipresence of guilt and The annihilating guilt

Guilt occupies an essential place in the daily life of this character. It is a primal, mythical,
religious fault. In many of the shared cases, the ecclesiastical factor has played a major role. The
severe gaze of the god of men. Annihilating gaze, omniscient and almighty, that executes eternal
sentences.

Raskolnikov syndrome
Guilt has three times: a preliminary (ruminating over possibilities in the loop of indecision), the
leap into the abyss of action, and a corollary where expiation joins rumination.

What we could call the “Raskólnikov syndrome” (the protagonist of Crime and Punishment)
takes place, with his fearful search for punishment for “crimes” committed or imagined, which is
a source of profound suffering.

In a vertical energetic displacement, this mental character, which massively rationalizes

conflicts, raises the energy to a world of abstractions.

Accusation
Indictment for the elections, for what could have been improved, achieved. Accusation for what
was not. Through innumerable projections and identification with the aggressor, or unfiltered
assumption of external judgments, he lives besieged by persecuting eyes. The shrinkage is
chronic.

Guilt addiction
A fundamental question is the management of the suffering of guilt. Guilt sensed, felt, and
thought. From pre-occupation to post-occupation.

Time endlessly rotates in circles. Anguish and regret prior to any decision. The pressure, the
weight of getting it right, of doing the right thing. Anguish and regret at the moment of decision.

Paralysis, compulsive acting, forced action. The jailer of conscience appears: subsequent
rumination sprouts. The terrible weight of responsibility invites, on numerous occasions, early
punishment.
The social E6 not only pays a price for the loss of the right to be, to express one's own strength,
but the fulfillment of the desire, if it occurs, entails a degree of suffering.

Guilt and Over-conscience

The inner conscience is not built as a silent witness but is a jailer. It ceased to be consciousness
to become “over-consciousness.” The guilt is installed not only because it does not avoid undue
impulses, but because it does not hit the right thing, which is absolutely due.

Oversized awareness entails an excess of responsibility, or rather, an excess of “ability” to

respond to external expectations, whether explicit or implicit, visible, or imagined.

The fear to freedom

The fear of the exercise of freedom, the assumption of one's own criteria, the legitimate use of
healthy aggression, and expressive self-assertion carries regret. With the norm not only
internalized but embedded, any spontaneous act of dissent becomes a terrible transgression.

The eye of God and the eyes of the human gods rest on the weight of history and mythical time
(the fall from paradise due to original disobedience), to which is added the autobiographical,
emotional time of the individual, full of slogans, and coercive scenes.

Feared and avoided, freedom constitutes one of the main taboos. Since disobedience implies a
probable exclusion, it is invested with a radical anguish.

In most cases, a continuum of concealment is observed, a “curtain,” of neutrality in the face of

the threat of freedom, with all its possibilities. In this existential invisibility, conformism is
systematic. It is safer to camouflage yourself in the group, in abstraction, in the dogma of faith,
in the leaders.

Primal insecurity and uncertainty. This character doubts himself and others. He suffers from the
Cartesian syndrome of the evil genius, “paranoid” creation of a mind powerfully questioning
both its perceptions and reality itself.

Then, either he plunges into the very void of questioning, persistent doubt, and lack of trust and
faith, or he eagerly launches into “shortcuts” (in the form of overvalued and secretly judged
ideals, dogmas, and leadership) of some prefixed rails.

Sexuality and The uninhabited body

His is an uninhabited, alienated, disidentified body, where an energetic displacement generates
devitalization, rigidity, physical, and psychic tension.
This alienation implies a distance from corporeal reality, a focus on the mental and a
disconnection from sensations, with the consequent unconsciousness of bodily experiences.

Thus, the body is experienced as something dissociated: an energetic entity that emits signals
that are more or less pleasant, that suffers symptoms, that is sometimes heavy and generally
strange, expressing a torrent of incomprehensible, and even threatening information.

Rejected sensation
Different people report messages and maternal attitudes of deep rejection of sexuality. Explicit
comments, faces of disgust, or more subtle attitudes, where the mere fact of having been
conceived was already associated with a dark, sinful trance. At the origin, the shadows.

“I experienced a rebirth: at my birth I felt in my body my mother's rejection for not having been
born a boy. It seems to me that this distanced me from her as a child, and I only came to
understand it a year ago.”

This is how the enervated, contractured bodies appear, displaying robotic movements, controlled
by a stroke of control by an ideal, rationalized self.

These stressed bodies, uninhabited by desire, walk on rails embedded in the codes of duty.
Before the obligation that the devotion.

These de-eroticized bodies walk devitalized or are nailed to rigid stakes so as not to escape the
control of impulses and bodily sensations. They roam the space with “neutral” faces, like
constrained automatons.

They avoid the energetic charge, the vital excitement (placing mufflers or mental distractors) and
wander aimlessly, having lost the compass of their desire. Adapted to the environment,

subjected to the ideal of austerity, they disperse in circuits of hyperactivity. Thus, an existence
marked by the deactivation of enjoyment is being drawn.

From the background emerge the mythical primordial punishments, as well as a childhood
maturation full of “scythes”: cleavers of pleasure: from play to the enjoyment of sucking,
crawling, pissing, shitting... exploring.

Civilizing laws are imposed on the legitimate assumption of pleasure, with praise for suffering,
the compulsion to sacrifice, the ideal of work and a life developed with the sweat of the brow.

Propensity to ideals and Psychic refuges

The idealistic orientation of this character gives his reality a quasi-religious theoretical quality.
Deficit mothering, together with an effectively absent father (due to excessive normativity or due
to emotional and physical absence), as well as the omnipresence of ideals and expectations
charged with mandate, weave an absence of self, an internal emptiness that is connected with a
primordial, radical insecurity. The mental refuge becomes a safe hiding place, a handle against
that depth of helplessness.

“My father sexually abused me, my mother did not defend me. I didn't tell mom about dad
because she was afraid of him and because he threatened to hurt her if I talked. It was many
years of this, also my dad went on trips a lot, a lot of absence, and when he was there, there was
a lot of aggressiveness, hitting, scolding, and my mom did nothing. It's like having mom absent
or perceiving her as weak, and this further distanced me from her. Being the judge that I am, I
wanted to behave, as if that would take away my dad's impulses. On the other hand, I greatly
admired him for his intelligence. There was a lot of confusion in my affections, especially in my
adolescence.”

The “disenchanted forest.” The maternal affective rootlessness and paternal absence are filled
with ideals and the values of the sense of duty, obedience to the rules of the social game, and
compliance with the norm.

By being deprived of the delight and pleasant management of the basic issues of daily life, it
loses its energetic and affective link with the vital flow. This loss of magnetism, this “exit” from
the river of life, of materiality, of the vital body, devitalizes him and positions him in existential
austerity, tinged with a lacking void, made of desert sand, resigned, resignation assumed.

This position implies emotional distance, disaffection, and derotation. A deficit of affective and
pleasurable attachment that causes routinization. In short, these quixotic walkers, obsessed with
windmills, do not dialogue with the Sanchos, they cannot even see them (or learn from them). A
dissociation is configured without any bridge that gives access, from the shore of ideals, to the
basic delights of everyday life.

Colonized childhood
In autobiographies, the maturing journey is full of blows to creativity. The abuses of power,
where the adult is appropriating the children's space, gradually impose correction, over-
adaptation, domestication. They are “killing” individuation and difference.

Schools full of guilt messages and dictatorial behaviors are sealing the thirst for exploration and
natural expression.

The distortion of consciousness

Consciousness, a beautiful beacon of lucidity, discovery, and illumination, stops exercising its
loving contemplative observation to become a severe court that exerts a suffocating pressure of
selection and filter. It becomes contaminated by the cascades of negative messages, which
become introjects, and it becomes an agent of self-persecution.

Choices are not rooted in personal power, in the genuine force of need and desire. First there is a
castration, a withering of the possibilities that life offers, because the options are reduced: you
have to choose what is appropriate, what is due.

The inner struggle looms. The taboo of selfishness, with its undercurrent of self-loathing,
inevitably leads to pain and loneliness. The “loss of the soul,” and the associated emptiness, lead
to a desperate embrace of reason, duty, the God who is in Heaven, who offers a refuge in the
desert of ideas.

The foundations of self-confidence are weakening, destroying the very essence of the supreme
will, which resides in faith (in one's own perception, one's own criteria, intuition). In short, self-
invalidation and inner enmity generate huge cracks in the bridges that connect you to life.

This is what I call a ―Prussian character.‖ The social E6 is cold, very formal. Kant, for example,
was a great philosopher. He was a Prussian, and the Prussians had that form of character which
has a great love of precision and an intolerance of ambiguity. This is precisely the complete
opposite of the Conservation Six, which is warm and too permissive of ambiguity. Among the
Nazis there were many social sixes. His behavior is very visible: ―this is the line, the party line,
the line that defines who are the good guys and who are the bad guys... and what we need to do
and we do it very efficiently.‖ In efficiency, the social E6 is similar to an E3.

Ichazo used the word duty, it is more than just being concerned with duty, for the six socials are
primarily concerned with the reference point. They have the mind of a legislator, clear
categories. His intellectual orientation is to know very well where the north is, where the south
is, and the west, and the east, and... And if they ever wanted to become human, they would first
need to go crazy and forget all the landmarks. They need to forget duty — no duty at all — and
connect with instinct and intuition, with life.

● - angry when things don't go the way I intend or I don't have control over them.
● - may obsess over pretending that everything has to be done under my codes or points of
view
● - having to leave because of vanity or arrogance
● - afraid to show myself or experience guilt for not being the way others want me to be
● - ―everything is going to go wrong‖.
 ● - trouble surrendering to the flow of life, accepting what is, what is coming, flowing with
intuition, stopping only what is necessary in thought to, immediately, act with freedom
and courage.
● - may be unable to see myself with less critical eyes and I am unable to welcome myself,
wrap myself, and accept myself in my weakness and with my mistakes.
● - need to be perfect
● - a coward
● - may be unable to live without a previous script, with the certainty of having the courage
to wait for what comes, knowing that at every moment I will have the right response.
● - Unable to tolerate uncertainty
● - resorting to any established pattern in my mind
● - mental dispersion
● - may be inattentive
● - lacks the courage to act and make decisions following the impulse to question norms,
structures, submission, obedience and the need to look good
● - unable to live emotions freely
● - does not experience life with serenity, calm and peaceful, open to fun, joy and pleasure.
● - may be boring if sober

Prosecution — that favorite sport or pastime that traps us people in the social six — also
recognizing that this aspect is intimately intertwined with self-esteem, because every time I made
a judgment, I was indirectly expressing with pride that the people I sat in the dock were inferior
to me.

May have trouble expressing my disagreement with authority and defending my position. I
manage to act with determination and strength, with courage, feeling the impulse no matter what
they say. On the other hand, practicing compassionate love with myself has helped me heal from
self demand and self-criticism.

The optimal state of an enneatype six, social subtype, will be, in my opinion, full acceptance of
myself and my fears. This acceptance will allow me to relax and conceive a deep state of
gratitude, joy and self-confidence. Freed from the sense of duty, I will be able to choose day by
day the life I want to live, trusting with my heart and intuition, feeling loved for what I am and
not for what I do.

E6- Sexual
Doubtful and Insecure
Doubting is the preferred entertainment of this subtype. “To be or not to be” is Hamlet's
dilemma, but E6 is not limited to doubting only on the existential plane. His doubtful thought
expands everywhere: “To go or not to go? To speak or not to speak? To eat or not to eat? Now or
later? Here or there?” And while waiting for an illumination that allows you to make the choice
without running the risk of making mistakes, the person to whom you should speak is gone, the
spaghetti is gone, and space and time take their course autonomously.

The interesting thing is that individuals of this character believe in their doubts. They think that
to doubt is necessary to carry out a fair and effective action. Doubting is the fearful person's way
of stopping time, with the illusion that “inaction will limit the damage.” Which? That's
secondary: the damage is anywhere.

The sexual subtype does not tolerate much doubt, does not want to be in contact with the anxiety,
frustration, and helplessness that come from inaction. So, when he can't take it anymore, he
impulsively makes a decision: go, speak, risk your life (trying not to lose control). He remains
with the doubt but at least discharges the accumulated tension. And then, like a good schizoid, he
adopts an absolute position and represses one of the polarities of doubt; he assumes an
aggressive and arrogant attitude to convince himself and others that this decision is the only
thing that can be done.

Doubtful thinking is connected to insecurity, which he tries to hide for fear that if they see it,
they will take advantage of him.

Reckless
In their attempt to hide their fear, the counterphobic E6 may venture into reckless, even
dangerous, actions. The myth of him is the hero who, “without blemish and without fear,” goes
into danger. And he also defies danger.

However, his adventuring is always controlled: his ability to quickly perceive dangerous areas
and the possibilities of finding a way out helps him. He knows how to calculate risk margins
very well.

He can be reckless when he comes across people who are having a hard time and need
protection. The contrast with the weak instills in him a kind of courage that leads him to face
really dangerous situations. Other times recklessness is a solitary experience, such as speeding or
failing to follow safety rules.

The deep motivation is to maintain the image of a strong person who does not give in to fear.
Sensing the risk, he increases the inner excitement that feeds the idea of being strong.

“In the early 1990s there were quite a few neo-Nazi attacks in Germany. One afternoon I saw a
bald boy attacking a Turkish woman in the heart of the city. With high adrenaline and without
measuring the situation I ran towards them, I grabbed the man from behind, pulling him with all
my strength and verbally reprimanding him. The surprised boy let go of the woman and I lived a
moment of glory: the victorious defender of the defenseless... Until I turned around and saw a
few more shaved heads a short distance away. The fright paralyzed me for a few moments until
realizing that there were many people around me, I took a step towards the neo-Nazis, shouting
that I was not afraid of them, that the others present were going to help us. I caused such a
scandal that the group preferred to withdraw. Only then did I panic and I was left shaking, while
simultaneously basking in the satisfaction of having won another fair fight.” (M.)

Challenging
It is a constant attitude, as if in the challenge he found the energy that allows him to face difficult
situations, tests that can confirm that he is capable. Also in the professional field his successes
are based on the challenge. Being a “reactive” character, he achieves goals thanks to his
willingness to prove that he can do it or that he is worth it. The challenge helps him combat his
low self-esteem, thus preventing a correct analysis of his possibilities.

It is quite a common experience for counterphobic E6s to have no real sense of time, as if they
don't want to be bound by restrictions or can't stand limits to their actions or desires. Meeting a
deadline at the last minute increases the level of anxiety and this allows you to overcome your
hesitant and cowardly inertia, thus managing to act.

“On the first day of secondary school, the Literature teacher said in an authoritative and
threatening tone that surely half the class would have dropped out before the middle of the year
“because the classical high school is not suitable for ignorant and low-level people like most of
you.” I remember the rage, the fear of being inadequate, and immediately the phrase that came
up inside me: “We'll see which one wins!” It was that energy that allowed me to continue to the
end of a tough school.” (G.)

The challenge can be dialectical and elaborate, in a desire to devalue the other by using his
repressed rage and his competitive attitude.

Suspicious
Mistrust and control are inseparable: everything should go according to plan because there is no
trust in the flow of life. Neither is there trust in the other, nor in his capacity, nor in his
intentions, to accompany him on the path.

This feeling is especially intense with people whose proposals are perceived by the sexual E6 as
part of a manipulative strategy, or emotional people with another range of interests, or who hold
power and, of course, are perceived as possible exploiters. But he sees everything through the
filter of mistrust. And follow the labyrinth of obsessive thoughts, bordering on the paranoid,
trying to decipher reality to decide the action. And when the ghost of mistrust takes power,
definitively and without restraint, the counterphobic launches, accusingly, on the attack.
Anxious
We have already discussed the state of anxiety typical of every Six character. An anxiety linked
to the primary anguish of being destroyed and annihilated. The force, passion of this subtype,
seeks to calm this anguish, and anxiety is the only accessible emotional state. Direct contact with
fear, which anxiety hides, would be uncontrollable and would destroy the narcissistic image of a
strong person that sustains the psychic structure of the counterphobic. And the same, contact
with pain or sadness, expressions of an annihilating fragility.

Paranoid
The paranoid attitude of people with this character is linked to their favorite defense mechanism:
projection. The parts of himself considered intolerable and ego-dystonic are attributed to the
other, in the firm belief that he is dangerous. He mentally repeats each of his gestures and looks,
and attributes to them meanings consistent with the basic presupposition: he is an enemy and he
is conspiring against him.

Thought is disconnected from reality, and fantasy is no longer just something possible but a
confirmed reality (obviously verified only at the level of your thought). The state of confusion
between reality and thoughts is such that he believes in them as if they were “facts,” concrete
data, and proven truths. The perception of being attacked becomes a reality from which it is
necessary to defend oneself. The counterphobic, then, is always on the alert.

Waiting is wasting precious time during which something irreparable may happen. So trigger a
defensive attack: “eliminate the enemy before he eliminates me.”

According to Claudio Naranjo, the sexual E6 has learned to defend himself against paranoid
fantasies through intimidation. Aggression and fear create a vicious circle.

“After much thought, he expressed a categorical judgment about others, labeling them as people
I should take care of and keep at a certain distance, looking at them from afar. This detachment
created distrust and suspicion, to the point that at one time I seemed to hear others while they
were talking about me.” (B)

Cynical
Because of his deep distrust of others, it is difficult for him to believe in human kindness and
sincerity. No one is good and trustworthy until proven otherwise. And he expresses this certainty
with irony and sarcasm, with acid criticism.

Friends don't give each other enough, partners are constantly judged, colleagues don't measure
up professionally, and bosses don't deserve their jobs. He finds it hard to believe that the other's
feelings are authentic: he expresses them as part of a manipulative strategy with hidden
intentions, which he will try to expose.
Since deep down the sexual E6 does not expect anything positive from relationships or love, he
takes refuge in cynicism, which gives him the strength to overcome the prospect of living with
such coldness, by preventing him from feeling the sadness that it implies.

“‘Believe in good feelings, in the expression of joy, always ready in enthusiasm, in the good
faith of others.’ I was ready to snark sarcastically when I saw those feelings. With cynicism I
confirmed the idea that there was nothing good in the world.” (B.)

In addition to being useful to defend against emotions, cynicism is also the mask of
imperturbability that hides your difficulty in surrendering to feelings and relationships. Not to
mention his belief that someone who is possessed by sentimentality is unintelligent or
psychically unstable.

“Cynicism has “saved” my life several times, but the bitter taste it left in my mouth convinced
me that it's best to abandon it in favor of a little sweetness. It's always been self-defense anyway:
it makes them lose interest in hurting you.” (C.)

The counterphobic E6 does not realize that cynicism puts a distance in relationships, and also
between what he feels and what he thinks, that makes him an unattractive person. Nobody likes
to hug a pretentious block of ice.

“Friends, and even some partners, told me that I was cynical. I did not understand the meaning,
but it deeply hurt me that they thought that of me. It seemed to me that I was a person who knew
how to see the reality behind the lies, while the others were blind maudlins.”

Defensive accuser
We have already talked about accusation as a cognitive distortion of the sexual E6, with which
he attributes to the other parts of himself that he cannot sustain (aggressiveness and guilt). To
protect himself from the alleged threats, he closes his space or with an armor that intimidates and
shields him from too intense feelings.

He is very sensitive to invasion (physical or psychological) of his territory, like E5. The
difference is that the E5 withdraws into his inner strength, the counterphobic hardens his body so
that the muscles form a wall, and he defends himself by accusing and holding the other
responsible for his own limits.

Faced with the conflict that he senses (and that he himself generates by making an enemy of
someone emotionally important, to whom he has attributed a kind of authority), the sexual E6
reacts by automatically accusing a priori, without dialogue. The first thing he feels is the
accusation of the other, an attack or some kind of offense that he does not question, that he does
not compare with reality. The feeling of not being recognized prevails, that he is being partially
evaluated and that the best parts of him remain in the shadows because the other does not want to
see them. It is an injustice!

Aggressive
This character is aggressive and angry, but in intimate relationships he expresses his anger with
great difficulty. It is easier to hear him yell and threaten in non-significant relationships, where
he feels he is at risk of retaliation or rejection. Many counterphobic E6s say they are bellicose
and rebellious at a social level, situations in which they feel supported by an ideal that justifies
their opposition behavior.

Many say they have experienced a great ambivalence between behavior at home and abroad. At
home, subject to the persecutor; in social relationships, persecutors who need to be seen as strong
and determined. Much of the anger discharges in the competition (intellectual or sports). In
intimate relationships, anger and resentment turn into an aggressive attitude, abrupt gestures, and
ironic words. The look is usually threatening and the eyes take on a forceful shape: round and
bulging, which attack. The way of walking is fast and well rooted, although the stiff neck and
shoulders betray the intention to control fear, ambushed in bravado.

“I am aggressive only in the dialectic phase, if I feel a threat to my personal integrity. I have
never fought with anyone (for fear of losing, but especially of hurting...). My real aggressiveness
was in the posture and in the look, which carried a sign: “Attention! I bite.” But inside I knew,
and I know very well, that it was to protect my weakness.” (C.)

Aggressiveness is a way of being that you are often unaware of because it is not a precise mood
but background music.

“I was very surprised when they told me I was aggressive. Inside me I was much more in touch
with worry and shyness.” (G.)

The typical counterphobic E6’s outburst of rage is a “reactive” gesture, responding to the other's
anger, disgrace, or accusation. But it can also be a reply to someone who does not think like him,
since it is unacceptable for him not to be right. Then the dialogue becomes hard; the tone, high;
the other's words must be cut off. There is no time to lose because everything becomes
dangerous and the opponent should not be given the option to go on the attack.

“It took me a long time to realize my habit of interrupting someone who was speaking to me. In
my house everyone talks interrupting; each dialogue is a war between people who never feel
heard, who are never sure of having a recognized place. I understood that for me, interrupting or
raising the tone hides a cry: ‘I also exist!’” (G.)
Being a coward is his Achilles heel, the most infamous experience. The aggressive tone and
appearance serve to hide, from himself and from the world, that, in fact, we are dealing with a
great “cagón” (shithead).

Loyal
In intimate relationships, they sign a tacit non-aggression pact. When the Sexual E6 decides to
accept the other in his intimacy, he is very loyal; sometimes of a blind and inexplicable loyalty.

On the other hand, he secretly “demands” a loyalty that is not so clear to the other. The speech,
below, becomes: “I accept you (apparently) as you are, I don't attack you, and you don't attack
me, you leave me alone, you let me go to my ball, and you don't discover my weak points. You
don't question me.”

It is an acceptance in appearance, since when he discovers that the other is not as faithful as he
supposed, he ends the relationship without feeling much, as if it were the breaking of an
agreement in a negotiation, with an objective, cold, and rational attitude. This behavior is very
similar to that of an E8, but this one has an experience of possession of the other, while what the
E6 wants is a non-threat pact.

In short, the sexual E6, after his supposed autonomy, hides from a tendency to merge with the
other, from whom he hopes not to be mistreated, as happened to him as a child, and who also
shares his ideas. Intellectual harmony becomes a unit of measure for the level of friendship and
love, and a pact of loyalty. It is almost impossible to think of a love story that does not include
appreciation of the other's ideas; as if eroticism were more connected with intellectual
enthusiasm than with the pleasure of the body.

In the relationship with authority, intellectual affinity is fundamental in deciding to what extent
to obey and follow a leader. It shifts to the person with authority the need for a guide to indicate
which path to follow and help them make sense of events. It must be an authority that, through
ideals, conveys a justification for continuing to live. The loving and warm relationship that the
father and mother lacked is replaced by collaboration, loyalty to a common project, intellectual
passion, and the sublimation of ideals. The sexual E6 is constantly looking for a “father.” The
superior authority becomes a myth, while claiming from subordinates the same adherence, the
same rigid ethical coherence.

“I had deeply rooted ideas, with convictions that prevented me from seeing the nuances and that
kept me rigid, unable to reach an understanding, without any possibility of changing concepts.
They reinforced my idea of always being right, of loyalty to the given word and of honesty in
intentions. With these principles I thought I would strengthen myself, because leaning on them I
seemed to know where I was going and what I wanted to laugh at myself and at others. Putting
them into practice, he seemed to have the appearance of a serious, responsible, competent
person.” (B.)

Critical and Authoritarian

All people with an E6 character are hypercritical. In the contraphobic it is a very evident
characteristic, which demonstrates his narcissistic desire to be the best, the one who should be
approved in his own right, the one who has all the qualities to carry out a task or occupy a certain
position.

“What could be easier and more beautiful than accusing others of a defeat? Destroying the other
provokes in me a great feeling of power.” (C.)

But this narcissistic self-image does not allow him to expose himself, as for example happens
with an E1 character, because the fear of being punished (castrated) prevails as soon as he
opposes and adopts an explicit superior attitude. Therefore, he cultivates this conviction within
himself, expressing it with criticism, sometimes in a hidden way, creating alliances and
analyzing where the other is wrong.

In the case of occupying a position of authority, ambivalence causes criticism to manifest itself
in the inability to trust others and to allow each one to act according to their own way.
Authoritarian control is even more evident when collaborating with someone “unintelligent”
(who is motivated by emotion and not by thought): “incapable.” The sexual E6 is so convinced
that he knows how to do everything that he fails to have confidence in the path or in the
creativity of others.

“I have had a hard time cultivating patience with my students. Whenever I saw that something
was wrong or that there was no clear thought behind it, I began to feel bad; physical intolerance.
I felt compelled to intervene as if I had to save a child from a fire. I projected onto the other my
experience of not being able to make a mistake, the catastrophic vision of the effects of an error.”
(G.)

When he criticizes, the counterphobic easily becomes a persecutor, intimidating those around
him with uncontested, stony criticism, and a vehement tone. Thus he combats the unbearable
feeling of impotence.

Rebel
We want to emphasize here the oppositional character of the sexual E6. His rebellion is
impregnated with fear of punishment, unlike the E8, who enjoys his desire to do what he wants
and does not care about the feelings of the other and what he does, he does not allow himself to
be limited and is ready for anything. In his rebellion, the counterphobic continues to feel anxiety,
although he may enjoy not respecting either his prosecutor or the rules. He even finds great
satisfaction in the transgression, but he will continue to watch carefully what the other's reactions
may be. He will oscillate between the pride of his strong image and the fear of having committed
something irreparable that will lead to rejection.

Theirs is a rebellion linked to the ideal of the hero: one who challenges the world for a just cause,
willing to lose his life to save others.

Observant and Inhibited

The sexual E6 explores the world cautiously. Although it is the most active of the subtypes, it
limits itself, circumscribes the field of curiosity and prefers to move in already explored terrain.
He is capable of dreaming of great trips to the ends of the world, but he is satisfied with having
glimpsed them; then he comes back satisfied that he had stuck his head out, and frustrated that he
hadn't involved his whole body.

“Observe to confirm what I think, observe as control of the situation, always alert, observe to
assess the convenience of being in a place or with someone.” (B.)

Shy
It is almost impossible to believe that the counterphobic is shy, but it is something that he has
lived with since his childhood, and that for many represents hell. It's like having an infectious
disease with fear that everyone will find out. Obviously, being shy clashes with the heroic and
strong image you want to give to the world. Despite your efforts to hide it, shyness is always
there like a devouring monster.

“At the age of twenty-six I had to present my first paper before a congress. She was obviously
happy and wouldn't have backed down even with an earthquake. Ten minutes before I went up to
the box, my neck, chest, and arms were covered in red spots. He was terribly embarrassed that
they would see each other. Since then, I have had this kind of reaction every time I had to expose
myself in public. I learned to dress so that those parts of the body would not be seen. Two years
later, on a similar occasion, exhausted, I spoke to the director of the school where she worked as
a teacher and he told me: “Don't worry, it's just the narcissistic need to be perfect.” The arrow
had hit the target: the symptom disappeared.” (G.)

Shyness is connected with the deep feeling of inadequacy, with the constant fear of being
ridiculous. The humiliation experienced during childhood and the lack of basic trust left an
insecurity installed in the body. Like a soldier who appears alone in the enemy camp, he tries to
be invisible so that they don't kill him.

This experience is similar to that of an E3, with the profound difference that a Vanity character
bids to be seen, in his desire for a relationship with the other, while the E6 prefers to be “left
alone,” taking away value to relational need.
Afraid of tenderness
The counterphobic instinctively seeks sexual intimacy, as if the intensity of these encounters
were enough to satisfy their need for human contact. He has no difficulty in surrendering to the
sexual act, which he tries to differentiate from the emotional. Always distinguish in relationships
what is only sexual and does not imply love. In a kind of double life; in the face of a discreet,
shy, almost straight and normative behavior, he is a collector of experiences: he seeks to feel
something deeper, again and again, impulsively, whenever the opportunity arises, without
success.

“Atrocious situations followed one another: from the way I gave my virginity to a stranger I
never wanted to hear from again (for me it was a procedure that had to be done sooner rather
than later, stripped of tenderness), to the sexual encounters, so many as possible, in search of
orgasm, to which it was difficult, and sometimes impossible, to surrender.” (R.)

He does not want the other to realize that he likes or desires him, because that would be putting
himself in his hands, allowing him to do what he wants with him. The tenderness can be a space
of no control and he does not allow himself to take off his armor. Just as he has not been able to
rest peacefully in mom's arms, he cannot give himself over to loving effusions either.

“If I liked a man, I preferred to show that he did not interest me at all. It was better to give up
than to endure the shame and the risk of being ridiculed. I always imagined this thought in the
other: ‘But who does he think he is to believe that I could like him!’” (G.)

Enduring
This experience has to do with the lack of references, or criteria. The sexual E6 has not had a
model. Or, in which there was, he does not trust and, therefore, has moved away from him. But
there is no confidence in his own signals either, because he grew up doubting them, with
messages of the type: “you don't know,” “they won't love you,” “they will cheat on you,” “they
will tease you”; and fundamentally, because he doubted the reality he was observing;

“Could that be true? Really? Wouldn't I be wrong thinking what I thought?”

So, in an uncomfortable situation, she tries to take the pulse of the environment, quickly see what
the others do, if they accept or reject her, as a test before making her own decision. But she is left
evaluating all the factors without making any decision. In this wait he can endure very difficult
situations. It might seem like an adaptation; actually it is an anesthesia; inside himself he knows
perfectly well that he does not want what is happening, but it is impossible for him to move until
the “certainty” arrives. At the same time he measures his strength by enduring hardships, psychic
and physical weights, to later feel satisfied that he has not fallen.
“Putting up with an uncomfortable situation is staying “waiting” for the other to see that I'm
right, that I'm right... and to do what I think is necessary. If I don't receive a signal, I tend to
repeat it several times, as if to listen to myself and stay calm so that what I'm saying is clear.”
(R.)

Braggart
He likes to look triumphant. It is a victory over oneself: over that “oneself” that, deep down,
knows that it is injured in its integrity. And under the pressure of needing a constant
demonstration or reliable proof of what he is capable of; that is, that he is able to get out without
harm, without pain, whether physical or emotional.

It is not enough for him to prove something to himself introspectively, in silence. For it to
acquire validity, for it to be real to itself, the sexual E6 needs to show it, say it out loud, explain
the battle…

This results in bragging, that fearless attitude that hides the inner insecurity for which you need
to explain yourself over and over again, checking that there is no criticism, that there is
acceptance. And there is also, deep down, a need to justify oneself.

Of course, he only needs to share it with those closest to him, with those who will not question
him, who will accept his bravado and agree with him, which will validate him and allow him to
feel moral superiority.

Honest
This is a trait that most sexual E6 recognize. By “honest” they mean that they do not tolerate any
hypocrisy, falsehood, or deception. Even telling a lie is impossible. The honesty that he seeks
ensures that he who fights for himself and for others is also correct, consistent and, therefore,
worthy part of his ideal of a hero without blemish and without fear, justice and the rescue of the
oppressed. And it is a way of going against the enemies: the exploiters, the powerful and those
who abuse power, even people who have money because how can you have money if you are
honest?

Competitive
The ambition of the sexual E6 is camouflaged as idealism, by the pretense of wanting success or
power at the service of justice and honesty. The idealization of himself as righteous justifies his
desire to be recognized as the best, or perhaps the only one, in competition with others, whom he
likes to look at as fools or people who are not up to the task (whatever they are).

Obviously, fear does not allow us to live this competition openly and visibly, which it condemns
as immoral or selfish. So in this field, too, the counterphobic E6 will advance with one accusing
finger and the other timid hand. He will continue to feel that a persecutor is going to come and
punish him for being competitive and castrate him for being ambitious. There remains a feeling
of frustration and rage against those who do not allow him (according to him) to raise his head,
and also of guilt for wanting to raise it so much.

And here is the so-called counterphobic character: sexual E6 goes against fear. So we could call
this neurotic need force. On a descriptive level, we can say strong in the same way that a
conservation six can be branded as a weak person. One is a rabbit and the other is a bulldog: a
counterphobic is much like a barking dog. It doesn't always bite, it barks more than it bites, but it
has a fierce appearance. The need is not only to feel strength, but also to be able to intimidate.

The internal program says that the best defense is a good attack. A very illustrative joke about it:
a woman went to visit several psychiatrists because she heard wing noises in her bedroom that
prevented her from sleeping. A novel psychiatrist gives him a gun telling him that he is going to
end his phobia by shooting, ―because you know you are stronger.‖ The next thing was a big
scandal: the man killed his guardian angel. So these are the madmen who go against danger, who
can kill anyone because anyone can become something dangerous.

● - may be out of touch with the passionate/emotional part that is fear

● - may not be able to feel the insecurity and the feeling of indignity
● - hesitant style of thinking and behavior
● - has a need to experience crazy, extravagant, out of the ordinary things.
● - difficulty feeling supported and in tune with the mudra of courage that corresponds to
virtue
● - neurotic illusion of being spontaneous
● - aggressiveness is the predominant gesture in the counterphobic, anger is not easily
expressed in the context of intimate relationship
● - free expression of eroticism and sexuality is inhibited because it would mean putting the
area of pleasure into play

On an emotional level, the contraphobic feels fear, but there is a redefinition of it in terms of
obstacle, limit and shameful defect from which it must be freed. For this, he develops a series of
behaviors whose objective is to convince himself and others that he is not a victim of fear. Being
discovered as fearful means reviving the sense of unworthiness and insecurity that he tries to
hide through his specific passion: strength.

"The impact was gentle and undamaged, but this was followed by two months of panic attacks.
The fear came improvised, it was vast, and the basic consciousness: you can die. The emotion
was fixed to the obsessive idea of death and prevented the further step: the awareness of the need
for safety and security... But I realized the existence of fear." For Barbara, the first significant
contact came when she was sent to a school: ―…in that place, alone and with the obligation to
stay (because my mother wanted it to) and to control my twin brother, I felt an enormous terror
that paralyzed my ability to express what I felt even with a normal cry, but at the same time it
was this inability to cry that increased in me the awareness of strength and endurance‖ The
paradoxical situation here is very clear. For Mireya, the intense contact with fear occurred on the
occasion of her mother's admission to a hospital: ―They took her up, she was still anesthetized
and she did not answer my call. A chill ran through my body; I thought my mother had died.
There I was, petrified, and when the nurses saw me, they started asking who I was, who had let
me in and they took me out of the room.‖

From the point of view of consciousness, the SAT process and the recognition of character six
according to the enneagram are fundamental, because the awareness that fear is the fundamental
neurotic need and forces its direct manifestation, helps the counterphobic to give an existential
meaning to his way of being, overcoming the obstacle of fear as a symptomatic emotion that
must be eliminated. The horizon of consciousness is broadened beyond the strictly psychological
aspect. It is difficult for a classical psychotherapeutic path to focus on this significant point.

In counterphobes, strength is often cultivated on a physical level (almost everyone has spent time
in sports or physical experiences that served to feel strong muscularly). Another trait is that of
strength as resistance to fatigue, repression, humiliation and pain itself. This aspect makes it
resemble an E4 conservation. The difference is that sexual E6 cultivates strength as an illusion to
sustain each other's attack and fear.

In the counterphobic it is not easy to perceive the energy he puts into the relationship because he
hides it from himself and others. In reality, their passionate search for strength is intimately
linked to the love relationship (attack and escape from intimacy).

The sexual fear starts from a basic distrust in relation to the other, of which he thinks that he will
surely hurt or deceive him; therefore, he must prepare, with his strength, not to succumb. But the
profound conception that a six has of himself is that he has caused the anger of another (because
he has been bad, or because he is not adequate, or he is not beautiful, or annoying), and this
constantly leads him to reject himself.

The counterphobic, accusing the other of being guilty, makes sure not to be singled out as evil
and therefore guilty; if this is achieved, he will not be punished and, as a consequence, expelled.

Behind the fixation of the accusation there is a constant and strenuous search not to be punished,
but the accusatory behavior allows to cover up the deep belief of being the real inmate, the real
bad guy.

For the counterphobic, the monster is the punishment of God and the consequent expulsion from
Paradise: this rejection by God has been the original indelible punishment and he has no other
possibility than to project it out of himself, on another culprit.
The change is in abandoning the anxious and illusory quest to be good, accepting and
acknowledging the aggressive part. The counterphobic is not aware of living with a gesture and
an aggressive attitude towards the other.

For a sexual E6, the crazy deals, split from reality, must change their valence: ―Even if I am
bad, I do not lose love‖, ―even if you are bad, you can love me‖, ―even if you are bad, I need
you‖. To reach this cognitive change, the contraphobic has to recognize the child's own part that
needs affection and tenderness.

The hot chair reveals the defense mechanism of projection and cognitive generalizations,
dismantling the logical accusation-danger-distrust scheme and disarming the counterphobic in
the face of contact with reality

The quality of counterphobic thinking reflects ambivalence in the relational context. Like all
E6s, the counterphobic has, on an affective level, the feeling of being trapped in a relationship or
situation from which he cannot escape. The love relationship is the place that is most sought, but
it is this same place that can hurt you and where you can totally lose your freedom and, above
all, your mental capacity. The counterphobic's style of thinking is doubtful. Taking direction
means acting, and acting means taking the risk of making an irreparable mistake. Every mistake
is, for character six, a fatal and definitive mistake.

Deep down, the contraphobic has a strong sense of being precarious, either in the relationship or
in life itself. He never has the security of belonging. He wants to belong and, at the same time, is
afraid of losing his freedom and psychic independence (integrity). To resolve the anguish of non-
belonging or belonging by staying on both sides, always doubts about the path he has to take.
This is functional for him to maintain the desire to belong and, at the same time, to be free,
without realizing either.

Consequently, he fails to feel loved and part of the other, and fails to feel completely free. The
truth is that he is afraid of freedom. It is better to be heroes in a delimited enclosure. To remain
in doubt means to save the skin. Change in the realm of thought is a very hard part of
transformation. Not using hesitant thinking means exposing oneself completely; it is like
throwing oneself into the void, because it necessarily involves an action. And if you are not sure
that it is the right action (that is, not wrong) it is better not to move and use doubt. The fixation
of accusation and doubt keeps the fear of acting standing because acting means heading towards
the risk of irreparable error. Not acting reinforces the feeling of emptiness, the height of the
passion of strength and fear.

Courage is a word that a counterphobic does not feel deeply until he experiences that the only
way to get rid of the anguish of life is action. It is not important to act justly, but to act. For the
counterphobic, courage means deciding an action, making mistakes, not defending oneself from
error, not accusing oneself or the other, accepting the consequences. It is important that someone
accompanies you in making decisions so that you can verify that the error is not fatal, that it can
be recomposed, and that you can apologize. You can fall without dying and without hurting
yourself (it was my most important discovery in martial arts practice). You have to experience
that the distress goes away when you act and not when you have acted well.

The contraphobic six manifests a marked control over the body with the aim of cultivating
strength and not feeling the chaotic emotions linked to the liberation of anger or free sexuality.

It is important to emphasize that, while aggressiveness is the predominant gesture in the

counterphobic, anger is not easily expressed in the context of intimate relationship — an area
that would be useful for expressing feelings or rights; it is easier for the sexual six, surely, to
express it in social relationships than in intimate ones. Expressing anger in the context of the
romantic relationship means reliving the fear of receiving aggression, the fear of being punished
and the fear of the old expulsion. But this means putting true heroism into practice

The sexual six also experiences pleasure with ambivalence: while on the one hand he seeks it
(sexual instinct), on the other he cannot demonstrate it because pleasure is closely related to
surrender to the other. And for people with this character, the other is always a potential enemy

In addition, releasing sensuality and eroticism would mean leaving room for tenderness, that is,
showing the weak side. Being tender brings with it the fear that the other can take advantage of
the weak side and also reveals the shame of feeling fear. The counterphobic resolves this conflict
by separating emotions: behavioral aggressiveness is disconnected from the deep experience of
rage, and sex, completely separate from the feeling of love and intimacy.

Under this aspect, the transformation has shown significant progress in the practice of
spontaneous movement. All sexual E6 people declare themselves dumbfounded by the potency
of this instrument and all recognize that spontaneous movement should be practiced for a
lifetime, not only to connect and integrate the split parts, but also to cultivate surrender and trust.

Talking about trust to a contraphobic is like talking about cats to a mouse! Not only is the other,
as a potential enemy, not trustworthy, but the counterphobic does not trust himself. The cognitive
conviction that every mistake can be fatal entrenches the idea that every decision can be fatal
and, therefore, no argument that the counterphobic has painstakingly constructed in his logic
split from reality will be enough to reach confidence. The separation between good and evil, and
the projection of evil outside, allow him to cultivate the illusion—on the edge of psychotic
defense—of always presenting himself as good and just. But if the split is not totally psychotic, it
keeps and hides inside a brutal monster.
The counterphobic constructs an intellectual explanation on the basis of which the monster has
every reason to exist: it has been unjustly mistreated, it is unjustly misunderstood, it is unjustly
abused, it has to protect itself from humanity, which is evil... On the basis of this approach, it
unleashes incessant battles that advocate against social injustice, for the equality of peoples, for
the right of everyone to existence…

But if the monster has to deal with love, that's when he doesn't know why it exists: in the face of
love, the monster is just a frightened child who has no confidence, who learned to give up, who
feels like one of the demons expelled by God because they were not worthy, who thinks that he
will never be able to fill the distance that separates him from beautiful and worthy beings.
Recomposing the dialogue with the inner child is the only way to transform the monster: from a
bad boy (who wants to see mom and dad dead) to a frightened child.

Sexual E6 often perceives beauty as a characteristic not only aesthetic, but as representative of a
category of people from which it is irretrievably excluded. The ugly and the bad are equivalent.
Although he dedicates his life to demonstrating that aesthetic beauty is not important —
cultivating it is an index of stupidity — in the hiding places of his psyche it is an unattainable
quality. The only thing he can do is conquer the beautiful object by cultivating (sometimes in
secret) poetic or visual art, or by trying to conquer the other/beautiful, thus projecting onto the
other all the qualities of perfection and dignity. Once conquered, he can tell himself that if the
other/beautiful one is accompanied by him, this means that he is not so ugly.

In the theory of Claudio Naranjo, E6 is a character predisposed to admiring love, that is, to the
search for someone superior and reliable in whom to believe. After undergoing various tests, the
other can be recognized as a carrier of qualities that the sexual six would like to have, or as a
good authority (opposed to the bad authority he lived during his childhood) and with which he
can resolve his conflict between surrender/trust. Unlike the E6 conservation, which seeks
protection in the other idealized, the sexual E6, in contact with the feeling of not being worthy,
seeks in the other a recognition that will allow him to be and not be expelled. In this sense, the
sexual six is an idealist, a dreamer, a hero of great battles and great ideas.

E6- Self-Preservation
Guilt
The identification with the aggressor and introjection of an internal persecutor, to defend
themselves from external threats, entail the development of a superego that constantly feeds the
feeling of guilt. This self blame is a way of controlling the world: “If it is my fault, I can do
something about it.” Then, they look for punishment, as masterfully portrayed in Dostoyevsky’s
Crime and Punishment, all with the hope of placating this uncontrollable self-persecution.
Unconscious behaviors sometimes lead them to “turning themselves in” to get the punishment
through which they, uselessly, hope they will be forgiven and “rescued.” This neurotic
mechanism leads them to search for the love of one of their parents (usually the father) through
the admission of fault and inadequacy, with the goal of forgiveness. Therefore, the conservation
E6 sees attaining love and appreciation through their own merits and personal value as
impossible.

Persecution
Seeing themselves as constantly at fault, they also feel persecuted: they project their internal
persecution externally. It is a form of paranoid thinking which incurs the following: other people
are always ready to catch your faults, attack you, and criticize you, and if they do not, it is only
because it is convenient for them to hide their intentions at the moment to ensure they punch
down the line.

Given that they demand from themselves more and more, they can’t handle that it is other people
that are accusing them and they continuously oscillate between victim and accuser.

Accusation
The conservation E6 has the competitive desire to take the place of the authority which tends to
cause controversy. They always believe they know how things should be done while submitting
to their superiors at the same time. At the same time, they love and hate the authority that they
mystify.

It is hard for them to take on responsibility in negative situations (failures, conflicts, etc.) out of
fear of being vulnerable and the other taking advantage of them. They accuse with the purpose of
defending themselves and ensuring that others don’t accuse them.

Worry
They obsessively search to confirm what they are and what they do. The dominant fear is of
failing and doing wrong; and it is so dominating that it blocks action or expression, and is as if
they lacked an internal method to determine the validity of a personal choice. Prior to action, a
long and troubling process leads them to ruminate with a rigidity that turns into pure inaction.
The fear of judgment compromises doing, with inhibition leading them to known or comfortable
goals.

In the work environment, they choose to do things they are sure of. They avoid changes in the
workplace for fear of not being able to deal with them, of lacking the ability or knowledge; they
do not propose things but rather hope that others do for them.

They do not like to improvise, they prefer to prepare before new situations, out of fear of
ridicule. The moment of confrontation with the other is very stressful. The feeling is always that
they are not ready enough. They need continual confirmation, by the people they trust in, that
they are doing the right thing. When this confirmation does not come to them, they mentally
review, typical of an insecure person, what they have said or done.

Indecision and Doubt

Their thoughts are centered on subjective content, to defend themselves from what they do not
perceive clearly. But, they do not recognize having departed from absolutely subjective
premises. Their primary goal is to demonstrate (especially to themselves) that their idea is valid.
A “cogito, ergo cogito” complicates things to such a point that their thought eventually remains
in the hands of doubt.

Doubt is connected with self-invalidation and ambivalence. They constantly devalue themselves
but at the same time have a great self-concept. They feel persecuted (in extreme cases can lead to
a paranoid schizophrenia). They even doubt what they doubt. They are suspicious of others and
suffer from chronic uncertainty about which action to take.

They love and hate the paternal figure that represents authority. They desire to please and attack.
They go through phases of contact and withdrawal: the desire for a relationship and for fusion is
as strong as the fear that they will completely become vulnerable. They have not built the ability
to establish clear boundaries, and they move with extreme ambivalence between their desire to
satisfy their own needs and fear of losing the relationship with the other.

Due to this fear, while the E9 has given up on maintaining the difference between the self and
the other therefore solving the conflict, the E6 invaded by the threat constituted by the other,
withdraws to protect the self, inhibiting any kind of decision and, therefore, any action, whether
it be at an interpersonal level with an external other, or at an intrapsychic level with a self
understood as the essential set of emotions and needs of the other.

Passivity
The issue of control is basic in childhood and adolescence both among their school peers and
their loved ones. The message received is: “The world is dangerous; you are weak and
influenceable and, therefore, we are the ones who will guide you because we know what is
adequate for you.”

Introversion
Between the psychological types described by Jung, the conservation E6 corresponds to the
reflective introvert. The introvert, locked in themselves, stays clear of too much contact with
external reality. This introvert is characterized by the primacy of thought: the ideas that they
have of other people affect their relationships, without them realizing the distance that they are
introducing into them. They have a negative relationship with the other, which comes from the
indifference to rejection. Thought tends to disarm the adversary. The other is always a little
neglected or surrounded by measures of caution they defend themselves from external demands
with.

The conservation E6 fears that emotional manifestations of the other will overcome them. They
prefer reading to overt social contact, are introspective, schedule their activities, and control their
impulses and feelings.

Lack of trust
The first psychosocial structure that the child learns, according to Erickson, is trust. With milk,
the child incorporates their mother and nutrition. The derived wellness makes the surrounding
objective world acceptable: this is the base upon which we base our mental world.

“I am what I get,” the kid could claim, in the sense that they trust themselves and others by the
quantity and quality of the security of what they’ve received. The conservation E6 has been
unable to incorporate the feeling of wellness connected to the relationship with a nutrition-
bringing mother, and as a consequence, they have not been able to build this trust on security.
This lack has made them insecure and fearful.

Ambivalence
The conservation E6 was an over-protected child who did not feel accepted in their own true
needs, which came with a recognition of their own less positive qualities.

If the child does not get help in their efforts of individuation to be who they are, or is pushed
toward a definition of themselves that satisfies the representation of their parent over their true
nature, there are two possibilities: submitting or rebelling. Or the two reactions together, which is
what usually happens.

At first, the child rebels, but over time, they end up accommodating themselves to the demands
and needs of their parents to avoid rejection and the withdrawal of affection, to not fall flat with
disapproval, and in practice, loneliness.

In their ambivalence, the conservation E6 cannot live serenely with adaptation nor
rebelliousness: both polarities are unsatisfactory for them and they live in an irreconcilable
dilemma between freedom and obligation.

Self-denial
When they have to choose between what they are, between their project, put out ahead by their
own efforts, and others’ projects, which is presented with guarantees of maximum support, the
conservation E6 accepts the easiest solution: other’s proposals.
They give up a super important need in this way: realizing their own efforts. At the root of this,
they feel a very strong hostility that, unable to manifest it, comes back against themselves in the
form of blame. To be accepted, they activate adequate behaviors, like obedience, goodness, and
solidarity. These are hard to attain if they are countered with other needs, like a natural
selfishness or the need to be oneself, even with that aspect’s own accompanying miseries.

They “eliminate” unacceptable impulses that, in spite of everything, they struggle to carry out.
The fear that they can overcome this self-censoring is what we call “anxiety.” In other words, the
E6 puts their mind to a self-idealization whose dominant traits are perfection, and feelings of
omnipotence and omniscience. In this manner, they make the illusion that they’ve outgrown self-
hatred and conquered others’ approval. That they have overcome the base conflict between their
need for self-realization and others’ needs.

Submissiveness
In Karen Horney’s description of neuroses, we can see this E6 in the conciliatory personality,
whose style of conflict resolution is resignation, particularly in tending to renouncing with
submission. The neurotic “resignation” restricted the field of action connected with their own
desires.

They can renounce all ambition for success, in that it implies effort and, additionally, the danger
of being imprisoned by others’ expectations and responsibilities. They prefer to cultivate intense
imaginative activity and fear their elevated ideal of themselves, while they delay the necessary
action to make things reality. They tend to be convinced of chasing what they want, which they
don’t really know much about. They lose the orientation of action because they do not have
contact with desire, nor with its implied emotional aspects. This leads the conservation E6 to a
detachment leading them to occasional inertia in the plane of action.

The submissive resignation causes extreme neurotic worry about conflict and punishment. The
mechanism of projection is evident through the way they invest others into co-action and
hostility instead of recognizing their difficulty to be “free” and themselves.

The conservation E6 is one type who can fall victim to inertia, paralyzed in all aspects of their
life. To drain the anxiety at the root, they feed a spooky omnipotent world that does not reveal an
authentic position of independence. And with submission they do not take action but rather
maintain an ultimate defense stemming from their internal world.

Selfishness and Stinginess

The conservation E6 houses the “crazy” idea that material and emotional resources are scarce
and that they can always lack basic things, with a threat toward their own survival. From this
erroneous perception, they derive their worried, and “selfish,” attitude with only some material
things and emotional relationships.
This selfishness is manifested in an attitude of always putting themselves before others, out of a
reaction of fear that they will never be up to the challenge faced. In general, this fear is not
conscious, and when it is, they become very ashamed of it and see it as something that should not
happen.

Cloudiness
The way of thinking in conservation E6 is always oriented to the past or the future. It is essential
to the need for security to predict anything that could happen and to be in a situation to face
difficulties, and directly proportional to the distrust in their capacity to do so.

Thinking about the past, in itself, is essential to the maintenance of control over possible errors
committed through the feeling of guilt, with the goal of corrective action and finding safety. The
feeling of guilt is, additionally, a defense mechanism against pain, from which they cannot be
abandoned.

Feeling comes after thought, which conditions it. As Hegel claims: “If emotions are not coherent
with thought, that is bad for emotions.” They control, above all, the emotions that could cause
conflicts with people significant to them. It is hard that they allow themselves a moment to not
think about anything, unless they get validation that it is ok. When this happens, this “not
thinking or doing” is very pleasant for them.

Their thoughts are seemingly logical, but only on a superficial level; in their deepest core, they
are undefined and cloudy. This allows them to not define themselves to other people, a strategy
which maintains their absence of deep commitment, and avoids confrontation and conflict. In
reality, emotions controlled like this come back strongly and dysfunctionally when thought no
longer allows a solution to problems.

Inhibition
The conservation E6 is very inhibited, in both instinctual impulses and aggression. Their hesitant
character is a vacillation between their impulses and an equally intense fearful inhibition that
stemmed from a fear of the father or, more widely, authority figures, and has led to a strong
superego.

They tend to have the personality, which can last a lifetime, of a “good kid”: someone who
ensures they live according to ethics and others expectations, with an ingratiating attitude, often
smiling.

Insecurity
Very different from the schizoid E5, who is a true loner, this character’s timid nature is more like
a type of stepping aside out of fear of annoying someone or out of insecurity, but truly yearns for
closeness, and satisfies their need for emotional support with a few close relationships.

Inefficiency
It is always a laborious process for the conservation E6 to make a decision, or even move: due to
their fear of change, it is easier for them to lengthen a situation than to keep moving forward and
confront a new challenge. This deliberate slowness, together with the tendency to create a fog to
obscure the clarity of things, make them less agile. Like the “fool” in fairy tales who, for fear of
making their own decisions, is often manipulated.

Fantasy
This type is much more of a dreamer than a doer, substituting reality with fantasy. A certain
inefficiency is the other side of their inclination toward their internal life and noble ideals.

The inhibition of emotional expression makes them a hypersensitive and fantasizing character,
blocking them from action and instinctual spontaneity.

For a strategy oriented toward controlling commitment, dreaming of fusion with another is more
functional than a tangible relationship, which would bring confrontation.

Without a right
The conservation E6 has always felt like a stowaway: someone who got on board without a
ticket: in their family, in love, at work. They are the disinherited heir, the wife abandoned at the
altar, the laid off worker. It is as if the shadow of these possibilities never abandoned them, ever
present.

Suspicious
The conservation E6 is always alert, looking for signs and indicators of hidden meanings
(opposite of the E3 who wants to have everything under control). They reflect too much!

They also like instructions. As dutiful distrusters, they resolve conflicts trusting in logic. While
the E7 uses intellect as a strategy, the E6 shows a fanatic loyalty to reason. To feel confident,
they adopt the strategy of searching for problems: they must have them in order to solve them.

The E6 conservation is the opposite of the E6 social. This one is warm and ambiguous, insipid,
sappy. It does not come to him to say that this or that is white or black. It takes a lot of courage
to say something is black or white. For him it is better to say: ―oh, there are several types of
shades of gray in between. And I don't really know what kind of gray we're talking about,
because life is very complex.‖ And so he can go on endlessly, always beating around the bush.
We have a person here who needs a lot of protection. He is afraid of not being protected, a fear
that manifests as insecurity. And his characteristic passion is the need to have something similar
to friendship: a little warmth.

What characterizes the E6 conservation among the three types of the six, is precisely this search
for heat. They are teddy bears. They want to feel the embrace of a family, to be in a warm place,
in a familiar environment where there are no enemies. In social contact there is a kind of alliance
formation of ―I am not going to hurt you and you are not going to hurt me‖, ―I am your friend,
be my friend‖. Freud said that such alliances were the essence of friendship, but of course they
are only the essence of a neurotic friendship: coming together in the presence of a common
enemy, huddled together in the face of danger. The "I support you and you support me"
phenomenon is humanly general, but the conservation six does this constantly, in its yearning for
a small, warm world.

● - Living in fear came naturally to me: I didn't see it as an impediment or as something

problematic.
● - Integrity, being true and consistent, was fundamental to me
● - I have had a hard time getting out of the dichotomy of Good and Evil.
● - I have always been clear that contradictions are inherent in life and in our humanity.
Intellectually, it is very easy for me to relativize, to justify, to include different aspects of
the other and of reality.
● - disconnection: I didn't know what was happening to me, I didn't identify what I felt or if
I felt something, I was blank, paralyzed, a little dead
● - I could not connect with anger, I understood it, but I couldn't live it
● - I felt unable to defend myself, without resources, and therefore afraid of the world and
life
● - constant attempt to make sure, to foresee just in case; so many times investing energy in
creating a security in which we do not finish trusting
● - ―If I have friends, people who love me, and who I love, I'm protected.‖

This way of relating, so common in the sixth conservation, I recognize since I was a child: I have
always had some close bond, of intimacy and trust, with which I felt safe, and from there I could
relate more broadly with the group. The search for warmth as a strategy continues to act even
today, when I arrive alone in a new group: I tend to stay a little on the periphery and naturally
locate someone to approach. I do not usually stay long in environments or situations where I
cannot generate some sense of complicity and support, some homely, warm protection. When I
do, I relax, the internal tension loosens and I can enjoy the group.

The adults around me said of me that I conveyed balance, serenity, peace, tranquility. This
bothered me, because inside I felt the opposite: I looked tight, tense, repressed, a little tormented,
distressed. What they told me was so different from what I felt or lived! I lived with different
realities and these only unified in my silence and endurance. All this helped to confirm a
characteristic of the six conservation: the feeling that head and heart were separated, and that the
unknown and threatening instinct is associated with monsters, with evil

The next caregiver marked me deeply. It happened between the ages of three and six. I was a
very cruel German woman who beat me a lot, threatened me and tortured me physically and with
words. He was always behind me, watching me coldly and extremely harshly, telling me that he
was doing everything for my good, as he was educating me. I was totally terrified, and I, the
eldest of two sisters — the third was born in this period and the fourth had not yet been born —
lived in an environment of fear, alertness and silence. My parents couldn't know anything
because, otherwise, she would get even with me. Nor did I want them to know what was going
on, as they might be frightened, suffer or become disillusioned, and I preferred not to bring them
trouble. I came to think that the caregiver could hit my mother, like she hit me. I was a child who
never talked about the negative, didn't tell what hurt me, didn't complain and didn't ask for what I
needed. I did or responded to what they asked of me, what I owed, or what was expected of me.
Looking at my photos from that time I find my look sad, different from the one I had before I
was three years old. At that stage I went on to have a continuous allergy in my legs that lasted
until I was 20 years old. Little by little, I stopped identifying what was happening to me and I
didn't know what to say when they asked me about me. It was not that I knew and hid or
concealed, but that I diluted the conflictive, suppressed it internally, leaving me blank,
disconnected. It conveyed naivety and a semblance that everything was fine, and I believed it
myself. All the pain and hardship of my childhood was hidden, minimized, I did not share it with
anyone, I did not consider the possibility of naming it until later I went to therapy. From the
perspective of the enneagram, I understood that this was how my conservation character six
crystallized.

I also don't remember expressing anger in childhood, and the only fights I keep in my memory
were quite innocent, a little later, with my cousin from Argentina. Also, I felt very bad when I
had bad thoughts towards people or when monsters appeared in my mind and in my nightmares:
I took the blame and the fear of punishment. I became very skittish. Any noise, a change of light,
a shadow could trigger my fear. He lived as if reality was always populated with invisible and
threatening beings. These beings and God watched over me, and even scrutinized what I thought
and felt; they would always be attentive to punish me, because it would be educational, for my
sake.

I felt a lot of ambiguity: a part of me sought to go forward, I was attracted to expression,

freedom, courage. Another part was pure insecurity, impotence: not knowing how to position
myself, what to say or do in the face of problematic or conflictive situations or people. I had a
hard time accepting my duality, my contradictions, as if this in itself was something bad and
lying, fraudulent.
Both the artistic expression and the clinical framing have been the most healing and
transformative for me. In both contexts I went beyond the taboo of taking out what happened
inside, which implied connecting with my emotional world, so blocked by unconscious fear. I
didn't know that the blockage I perceived in the relationship with my emotions and inner life,
typical of E6 conservation, was a consequence of fear. Fear of feeling, fear of pain, fear of
intensity. I had a fantasy that I could not stand the intensity and that it would disintegrate me.
And, on the other hand, I longed to go beyond the barrier that prevented me from feeling.

A fundamental change was to begin to perceive and say what is happening to me without much
time passing. When I'm in fear, I have a hard time even realizing what I see, feel, and think. In
fear everything fades, as if I were in a cloud that confuses me, blocks me and there I stay. If I let
myself be taken by this feeling, the fear grows and each time I block and shrink more, and the
distance between my head and heart increases.

In my process I learned that, if I can sustain fear and go through it with awareness, I begin to see,
to realize what is happening to me, beyond fear. The most transformative thing happens when I
manage to say what I feel/think/see. I have learned a lot about this subject in my marriage, since
in previous couples I almost did not say what I felt, especially what I did not like. I kept it,
adapted, molded and told myself that time would solve it. He justified everything because if he
named the conflict he could make things worse, lose the other, and be rejected. I was so afraid to
manifest myself that I thought it was better not to say anything: it will happen, it will change.

Seeing fear as a central element in my neurotic dynamic, and not as something natural, has been
decisive and very healing. Before it was so close to me that I could not focus on it and, therefore,
I could not delimit it either. As I also tend to be confident and optimistic about others, I did not
identify with the descriptions of paranoia and distrust associated with this character. Now,
whenever I can name the fear, it becomes more concrete and localized, and then it decreases.

There is also an unconscious use of naivety as a defense in the form of ―I didn't realize it‖ or ―I
didn't know,‖ a childish attitude. A position of innocent weakness. I think this also has to do with
guilt and fear of punishment. It is a mechanism that blinds me and that really prevents me from
realizing it in the present, therefore I cannot take responsibility and defend myself in the
moment. Today, when I look like this, I stop and wonder what is happening to me, that I am
afraid. When I perceive it, something changes, I can take responsibility, and even if it hurts, I
reconnect with strength and confidence.

In the process I understood that behind so much fear of the harm they could do to me is the fear
of doing harm. When I began to feel the rage, the fear of exploding, of losing control and doing a
lot of damage appeared: the monster.
E7- Social
Narcissistic
Narcissism is a central trait of the social E7. We do not deal with it here in its clinical aspects,
but on the level of common sense, as an expression of egocentrism.

Narcissistic refers here to a self-referential tendency in the relationship of the social E7 with
reality. As if the events, experiences, and people implicitly subordinated them to his existential
project.

It is appropriate to assume that the maternal function has been insufficient to install a bodily
feedback system and has not facilitated contact with one's emotions. In addition, it has been
accompanied by a positive expectation, a fantasy in which the mother imagines that the child can
become an important and prestigious person. It is a narcissistic projection of the mother, of a
substance more mental than emotional, which through a dynamic of identification of the child
produces the basis for the process of idealization of himself.

This dynamic crystallizes, over time, in an automatism by which he only perceives the positive
aspects, in a self-identification embedded in the superiority of someone who apparently enjoys
life and does not need anything or anyone.

As we have described, the narcissism of the social E7 is hidden in a social dimension where the
motivation of sacrifice stands out more. Good manners, facilitating the other, or the repression of
anger allow him to put himself in superiority. The idealization of himself and others allows him
to separate himself from his inner world, so that his pain, which he perceives in some way in
times of difficulty, is continuously avoided.

The pain of rejection, feeling unacceptable, and abandoned, their inner value or the idea that we
should do nothing are at the base of the structure that organizes the social E7, and are constantly
avoided through a brilliant and captivating behavior, imbued with omnipotent fantasies and the
fullness of a false self that is actually its weakness. It is like a beautiful house built on unstable
ground that, over time, begins to cause problems throughout the structure. Just as Narcissus gets
lost, swept away by his own beauty, the social E7 gets excited when he displays his seductive
and manipulative modality, living in an ideal dimension to every circumstance that could
potentially be the one that determines his destiny and that of humanity (grandiosity,
omnipotence).

In short, the narcissism of the social E7 is manifested along two fundamental dimensions: self-
referentiality and grandiosity, the result of identification with their ideal self.

Egotism
The difficulty of contact with the other translates into many behaviors of loneliness. The
perception of a fundamental inadequacy coexists, an inaccessibility that resembles in certain
aspects a social phobia, the lack of contact with others, and a certainty of rejection.

Helping through sacrifice is actually a narcissistic modality imbued with selfishness and
exploitation of the other, unconsciously and with apparent disinterest. In the private sphere it is
revealed in the most obvious ways where passivity expresses an expectation of care.

Envious and Intolerant to frustration

Envy, the central passion in E4, also appears in this structure, with the idea that others have an
easier and more pleasant life, and can afford more things to satisfy their desire without doing
anything, just like a child who has everything he wants without lifting a finger, in absolute
passivity.

The underlying insufficiency, the narcissism inherent in the idea of being a special person and
therefore having the right to particular treatment, added to the envy of idealized people who have
greater social prestige, and the attitude of going against authority, they make any frustration
upset a precarious balance, in a self-destructive mix.

It is as if deep down there was an unacceptability of the present moment, which is structured
from the compulsive desire to relive the excitement of vain drunkenness. It is a feeling of power
that you feel when the passion of social sacrifice is realized: A very strong energetic charge
suddenly gives you a deep sense of identity that, as if by magic, cleanses the weak and fragile
parts, and the feeling of pain.

He lives like this, in fantasy, as if the ideal of life had been realized. When contrasted with
reality, frustration comes inevitably. Unlike the E4, which tends to self-frustrate to maintain
constant pain and sadness, the social E7 avoids frustration through a constant of pleasure where
it ends up entering a destructive spiral in which it challenges life.

Excessive
As we will see later, this character uses his body in excess. Firstly, in sexuality, which is coveted
since it creates a clash between tension and relaxation. Then, alcohol dependence, smoking,
television, work... and anything else that helps you, through hypomanic emotionality, to modify
what you find unacceptable or frustrating. He has to turn off the screams of a fierce narcissism
inside him that reminds him that he is not what he should have become. And from there, the
excess as narcotization. As if in mania he could, for a moment, disguise reality to make it more
like what he would like it to be.

This can create an uncontrollable compulsion that only stops when it's too late, when the body
gives major signals of difficulty. His challenge to life has the flavor of an angry protest and
demand for fair compensation for having failed, after the suffering experienced by becoming a
benefactor of humanity, a great guru, a powerful shaman. It is the only way, only in this way, at
high levels, it is possible to match the accounts with life.

Good and Helpful

The good nature of the social E7 must be understood as a strategy to get a look of desire and
completeness from the other. As often happens, he reproduces the game he learned with his
mother. That look is a love with lowercase letters. A love conditioned to you behaving as I wish,
to playing to complete me. In the social E7, the excessive reliance on pleasure, and the
exaggerated avoidance of pain and frustration are sustained by an automatic scheme of seductive
indulgence of the other to capture and receive attention. In a social dimension, this strategy is
made explicit in being good and helpful, apparently sacrificed to the needs of the other.

If the trap of the social E7 is complacency, it does not manifest itself in a general sense but only
with those for whom it feels an interest and for a limited time.

Good and helpful in the enneagram there are several characters, but the only one who makes a
career to be a saint is the social E7. For this purpose, kindness and service to the other with an
aggressive internal narcissism, which seeks extraordinariness. Who is more good than a saint?
Who is more extraordinary than a saint? The saint is one who has been recognized by the
community. The social E7 is not only interested in being one in private, but wants to be
recognized in the public square. The image of holiness also suits this character as saints are also
allergic to physical violence and genital pleasures.

Guiltiness
We will begin with the account of an episode in the life of Saint Francis in Assisi.

“Something similar had happened to him before, during the winter of 1220-1221, when, forced
by one of the frequent recrudescences of his illness, he had allowed himself to eat cooked meat.
As soon as he felt somewhat recovered, he ordered his vicar, Pedro Cattani, to drag him half
naked, pulling him by the neck through the streets of the city of Assisi, at the end of his
preaching in the cate by a rope. Arriving at the main square and the place where criminals were
executed, he confessed aloud, and in front of a large crowd of people, the sin of gluttony he had
committed.”

We have already seen that being perceived as extraordinary is a vital neurotic need for him and
that the map to get there is drawn from the information he has collected from the world. The
ultimate goal of your existence is determined by your ideal self. Freud defined the superego as
one of the three instances that form the psyche, the one in charge of supervising the ego. The
superego is especially relevant in this subtype because the concept of sacrifice captures a
particular submission of the psyche to this inner ideal. In the psychic life of the social E7 a fierce
fight is waged between his ideal self and his real self.

The social E7 is the one who has the most contact with his superego of the three subtypes, since
he has relied on it to point him to the place of the Holy Grail. This split inner reality will be a
source of anxiety in relationships with oneself and with the other, knowing oneself double.

The internal movement is persecutory, with a high degree of guilt. It is the effect of renewed
frustration, of the inability to fully realize oneself, of being in life. This trait resembles the E6
characters, with the difference that the E7 has the ability to avoid and escape from the fear that
can produce, and with which the E6 constantly coexist. In the related scene, Saint Francis
transgresses (because he has real needs) and then makes a spectacle of his penance. Living guilt
seems to forgive him in the eyes of God, and makes him feel superior. We find an aspect of
jouissance: in the terrible guilt he feels fulfilled.

Hidden rebel and Devalues authority

The social E7 will look anything but a rebel. At least not a dangerous rebel. But we must not
forget that their relationship with their parental figures is tinged with manipulation, fraudulence,
and a secret feeling of being above them.

Thus, the general rebellion of the social E7 occurs with everything that limits him, frustrates him,
makes him put his feet on the ground, or contains him. It is a rebellion that will hardly appear
directly, since he is terrified of conflict. For it to manifest, it needs a strong maternal
authorization and a type of conflict in which the position of rebellion assimilates its ideals.

Paco Peñarrubia speaks of rebellion as a counterdependent reaction. From here we can specify
two types: rebellion against the father and against the mother. It is an underground movement
against the mother or father who have failed him, a way of returning the aggression suffered due
to the confusion of roles.

The rebellious attitude, which has its roots in early childhood, expresses itself fully against
authority in adolescence in an unspoken and silent manner. As with idealization, it has already
taken root in the end of somewhere else to avoid what is frustrating and potentially painful in the
here and now.

The social E7 harbors a feeling of rebellion against authority, a lack of discipline, and the
automatism of running away from responsibility, with the superficiality that this entails. It
becomes strong so that it doesn't have to be nice anywhere, and it disperses through fantasies and
new projects of unlimited possibilities.
Formal obedience (instrumental and aimed at avoiding conflict) and internal rebellion coexist in
this character. Overt rebellion, understood as disobedience, is not typical behavior, because the
social E7 lacks the assumption of obedience in terms of recognition of authority. In addition, he
lacks the aggressive drive necessary to maintain a direct contest with authority. If he enters into
conflict, he will never abandon the word and the correct channels to show rebellion.

The rebellion is internal and is connected to the concepts of aporia and chaos. It is a chaotic
plunge into a realm without limits or boundaries, in a personal limbic interregnum where there
are interpretable rules.

The social E7 can, then, accept a rule even though it does not share its meaning, devaluing the
person who embodies authority. It is a veiled and angry rebellion, which does not reach adult and
equal confrontation.

In this very mental character, one of his favorite rebellions is the intellectual one. In her, the non-
assumption of intellectual authorities, added to her difficulty in delving into concepts, generates
a certain wandering and multi-knowledge at the service of her wanting to look extraordinary. It
seems that he is more interested in impressing his interlocutor than letting himself be touched by
the knowledge he acquires. The concepts acquired on the fly turn them into weapons of
seduction and of rebellion. The social E7 enthusiastically welcomes new perspectives, new
models and, before even chewing them, making them their own and digesting them (letting the
content feed them), activates the mechanism of rebellion through criticism to identify the
weaknesses of the system and imagine the reasons why you can immediately spit it out.

From this point of view, all the ideas are good and none are convincing, all the systems are
fascinating and none are exhaustive. Of each model, as of each person, it sticks, like a post-it, to
a superficial characterization. Devotional gluttony for knowledge is what drives you forward,
pushing, in search of perfect revelation.

He lacks the intellectual sobriety to be able to stop and build knowledge in small steps,
deepening, synthesizing. By becoming permeable to various types of knowledge, he limits his
intellectual development. Everything that emerges again from the knowledge process leads him
back to what he already knows, sometimes with extreme superficiality and synthesis, and quickly
rediscusses it in a critical way. This activates in the interlocutor the perception that the mind of
the social E7 can contemplate anything and the opposite, in a kind of cognitive polymorphism.

The deepening in the different models is done, in any case, with an attitude of rebellion towards
the teachers; always with a clever wit, but never in an explicitly destructive way towards the
person.

Intolerant of discipline and Afraid of commitment

The social 7 has no choice but to become aware of his self-indulgence when he observes his lack
of discipline. The only form of discipline that he knows is that which is expressed in the
passivity of renunciation. In the field of action, he fails to plan and work on the basis of
predetermined objectives. Follow the spur of the moment and instrumental goals to your
visibility in the relationship. It manages to keep only the narcissistic motivation stable, but not to
project itself in a dimension that is authentically oriented towards fulfillment, for which it is
worth committing and maintaining the agreements. He is satisfied with his intellectual planning.
This aspect makes the social E7 inherently unreliable.

Regarding trust, he does not believe in his own personal worth and therefore cannot get involved
in an existential project. This basic position is confirmed by their inability to respect promises
and keep agreements which, although supported by excellent justifications, does not allay the
feeling of defeat and indignity. This model of neurotic functioning represents one of the
mechanisms of perpetuation of failure at the social level of this character.

Planner and Idealist

The social E7 lives on projects and fantasies about how he can realize his dreams, confusing the
imagination with the concrete act of realization, and often remaining in the ideal illusion. It is
common for you to start new projects with enthusiasm and then abandon them in the realization
phase. This trend is due to two concomitant aspects. On the one hand, the difficulty of
overcoming conflicts that would require the use of aggressive aspects, and on the other, that
every realization implies frustration, since in the imagination more was expected from that
project.

You often harbor a desire to always have plenty of options available to you and find it hard to
make a real choice. Just as in affective relationships the social E7 feels caged, rarely in life do
choices have the feeling that the decision could be right, with all the suffering that this could
bring. He returns again and again to the place of potentiality, where everything is possible and he
does not have to deal with castration, his own limits and his own humanity.

The multiplicity of options makes possible decision making difficult. Not so much because of
having to face the doubt but because he knows that in all the elections he will have to go through
a certain degree of frustration. The lack of discipline and the difficulty in assuming
responsibilities create the budgets to remain an eternal adolescent. Thus, long-term
responsibilities become unbearable obstacles.

Satisfying the neurotic need for novelty, to travel, to change jobs, to be interested in new topics,
or to open the hypothesis of going to live in another city are all tricks to always have a plan B (at
a mental level) on the go that allows you to fantasize about the possibility of leaving the model
that creates certain difficulties when you get older. The game is beautiful when it does not last
long.
The mental fugue in fanciful planning saves you from frustration and often prevents you from
committing to the concrete in one direction. The resulting mental excitement is sometimes
sufficient and fulfills a compensatory function for the ability to actually put oneself into play. It
is therefore closely linked to the double objective of maximizing pleasure and minimizing the
pain (frustration) that comes from the shock with reality.

Fantasy also represents the area where omnipotence and the grandiose identification of the social
E7 can be expressed without fear of denials, and serves the gods and not men.

Skeptical of authority
We have already discussed the social E7's compulsion to appear extraordinary. What is more
extraordinary, regarding power, than to renounce it?

Social E7 show their antisocial side to power in their lack of trust in authority and hierarchical
structures, and in tolerating long-term commitments and taking responsibility. It is difficult for
them to occupy positions of power, especially in explicitly patriarchal structures.

On a social level, however, she can create areas of influence through her work, taking advantage
of her capacities linked to feminine values of care and the transmission of knowledge. He does a
good job as a family doctor, therapist, priest, or teacher. Likes the role of teacher, guide, or guru.

Masked competitiveness
Placing himself in the role of the anti-leader allows him to maintain an internal representation of
superiority and make explicit an apparent detachment from competitive logics, with the
advantage of not having to come into contact with aggressiveness and conflict. Even so, he has to
feed the narcissistic beast that animates his neurosis, with which his competitiveness is voracious
but never explicit. He must arrive with rewards when home and if not, he eats away inside until
he manages to activate those rationalizing and idealistic defenses with which he rewires his self-
image.

If he can't win, he will create a subtle narrative where the important thing was not to be first but
to be second. Failure dismantles his crazy idea that he can do anything and leaves him at the
mercy of suffering again the emotional pain that bothers him so much. Losing casts doubt on the
character; therefore competing and winning is essential.

Afraid of conflict
The social E7 reacts anxiously to conflicting movements of individuation in groups, and
compulsively activates behaviors that tend to smooth out differences and deny conflicts. His
idealism supports an idea of shared power, typical of communities of life. It is a type of social
structure that does not take into account the political-economic-social status of people to
organize interactions. All masks fall and there is only one encounter between people, without the
structural aspects contemplated in social relations.

The ideal of shared power, with its potential for organismic self-regulation, mutes his need to
avoid conflict and allows him to avoid the pain of conflicting interests. Exotic trips, retreats in
monasteries, infinite formations... seeking to be constantly in a ritual of passage, without
participating in the structure of the world, or facing the pain and repetition of everyday life. It is
that being on top of the mountain, being well, feeling alive, feeling like brothers.

We can see this in the Rule of Saint Francis that, when he creates the Franciscan rules, what he
wants is to avoid contact with the social structure. And one way to do this is to avoid contact
with money and property.

The social E7 is ultimately more concerned with organizing hope than with generating a practical
and reproducible structure.

Theatrical
A great theatricality, an innate comical vision allows him to draw attention to himself with the
linguistic ability to amplify and extreme normal behavior, making it become paradoxical and
grotesque with the creation of authentic characters. The social E7 has a natural comic tempo that
allows him to enter any conversation, transform it into something funny, accompanying him to
do everything with a naturally congruent gesture.

The long training in the pursuit of pleasure allows his mind to be constructed in such a way that
he can find comic aspects in any situation, as if he were spontaneously capable of reconstructing
it in humorous terms. It is a diversion that lives first in the inner world to later become the way to
get along with others. It gives her a shot of energy that reaches its maximum in situations of
seduction. This modality is evident in his talent for telling stories through quick and spirited
associations, and is at the same time the matrix of an excitability that in some can become manic.

Hedonistic
The social E7 identifies love with the permissiveness of its desires. Here again is the
schizophrenia of the social E7, where one thing is inside and another is outside. On the outside,
hedonistic permissiveness is covered by the label of hedonistic capacity. He shows his ability to
enjoy, which he uses to detect, obtain, and consume pleasure, within his narcissistic display. He
brags about his licentiousness and his ability not to get stuck there.

Inside, on the other hand, a hedonistic debauchery leads him, depending on his state of mind, to
need huge doses of pleasure of all kinds in order to recover a minimal existential presence. This
inner reality has more to do with the addiction than with the use of the pleasurable. Pleasure is
the best medicine for his narcissistic pains, he believes. Or the one that works best in the short
term, allowing you to go through the painful symptoms that your reality produces.

Seductive
The interpersonal strategy of the social E7 is very subtle and hidden at the same time. We could
define their way of relating as the expression of a basic ambivalence, in a mechanism of
seduction and withdrawal.

When he is in the vicinity of the other, the seductive game of the social E7 intensifies, and he
uses his best qualities: youthful, cheerful, teasing. As if he were in the service of the other, to
change his mood and do him good, so that he feels good, make an unforgettable moment,
creating an anchor with good humor and well-being. It becomes essential to surprise, fascinate,
amuse, do anything that allows you to reach the other in an indirect way, and even better if in
that false disinterest the other can get closer. It is never a straight process; choose the other
without seeming to choose it. And since he has the other in his head, he can strategically exploit
any minimal opportunity to interest him and progressively approach him without showing
interest.

On the one hand, the discharge of another has been delegitimized, because in the internal world
of the social E7, the experience of abandonment threatens any possible encounter. Desiring and
the physical sensation of being rejected become contaminated, making the expression of desire
unacceptable because it puts the person at risk of pain. The fear of reliving the old pain is at the
base of their avoidant thoughts and behaviors. And the conviction of being able to ride it alone of
not needing anyone crystallizes, over time, in a self-referential dimension centered on his
internal world.

There is a strong similarity in this to the false abundance of E2. A magnificent idea of oneself
can be expressed in similar behaviors in both enneatypes. Now, the E2 contacts the other with an
emotional sensitivity that allows him to grasp his needs in advance and satisfy them, and this is
how he earns the qualification of great seducer. The seduction of the social E7 is more oral,
above all, mental. He catches more with his words than with his energy.

Withdrawal or abandonment is very important for this character because social contact, even
superficial, is dangerous. It can bring back a crack in your extraordinary self-image. So contact is
a short game to gain a look that confirms your self-image. Anything else is too risky. Better to
retire, since in solitude you can continue to decorate your self-image without the hassles of
reality.

This defense, which he shares with schizoids, makes him like to go to his cave to relax by not
having to act or serve the other. The world tires him because he relates to it in a neurotic way. On
the one hand, with a seduction that seeks confirmation of his ideal image. And on the other,
compulsively postponing the satisfaction of their own needs to serve the other. Exhausted and
disappointed, he leaves.

While in the social moment sympathy and friendliness prevail, in the private he finds the place to
recharge from the energy spent in society. An infantile regression prevails that hides the inability
to manage one's own feelings, with a deep desire to be cared for, or to abandon oneself to
laziness and uncompromising fun. The intimate space with oneself is a refuge where the forces
invested in the construction of the relationship can be replenished. It is a place of isolation and
physiological recollection, a refuge from social anesthesia.

Abandoned
Sometimes the withdrawal appears when he has already achieved some narcissistic gratification.
Other times, when he is exhausted by his inability to be authentically in the relationship. And
finally, as a way of inflicting emotional pain.

Given that in his core scene of infantile pain there was an abandonment by the parents, real or
felt, the social E7 is going to punish the other by abandoning him when he wants to avenge
himself for some damage suffered. It is possibly his most aggressive way of attacking the other:
abandoning him. Everything silent, swallowed, undigested in the relationship explodes in this
action, often unexpected, in which he takes out all his rage in a passive-aggressive way.

Charlatan
The concept of charlatanism refers to the tendency of the social E7 to manifest its seductive
capacity on the intellectual level through a skillful use of verbal intelligence. He can, in fact,
present himself as a storyteller, almost a juggler of words, moving nimbly between irony, the use
of metaphors, and a taste for handling intellectual concepts.

The social E7 is the counter-type seven, in the sense that it is difficult to recognize in him the
passion of gluttony, because he strives to hide it with an altruistic behavior that, in some way,
should purify him from the guilt of feeling an attraction to pleasure or to one's own advantage.
This is an attraction that he tries not to feel by pursuing an ideal of himself and the world: he
sacrifices his gluttony to be better and for a better world where there is no pain or conflict.

The social seven are people who, on the surface, do not want to exploit others, do not want to be
tied to their desires. They are very pure people, too pure. There are some sevens who are very
concerned about their diet, about world hunger, and so on. New Age fashion was a hotbed of
these seven social cultures. It would seem that the individual had the intuition that he hides a pig
inside himself and said, ―No! I'm going to define myself as a detached pig.‖ This is the social
seven.
The word Ichazo used was sacrifice. But it is a sacrifice of gluttony. It is a postponement of
desires before an ideal. The deception is that these people really have a great gluttony in
recognition of their sacrifice. They want others to see them as very good.

Now I am going to give a bad example about the social seven, since I will refer to the life of a
true saint, highly revered in the Christian world. It is obvious that I am talking about San
Francisco, who was this type of person. Saint Francis followed the kind of advice that William
Blake gave: if we lived madness and followed it, then it would become wisdom.

If the mad and neurotic man fully lives his madness, he would become a sage. It is a path. So San
Francisco wanted to be good. Therefore, he did all the things that a seven needs for
transformation: he lived miserably, he raised stones to repair the shrine, he kissed lepers...
Nothing could be more horrible. So he did all the right things to detach himself from the seven of
him.

But if we examine the early life of Saint Francis, we will find a very revealing anecdote.
Together with his monks, the saint built a kind of tent to take shelter. Suddenly it started to rain
and Saint Francis and his monks went to the shelter to rest. But when they arrived they found a
farmer with his cow inside the store. And Franciscan generosity was to give priority to the
farmer and his cow.

It seems to me that health, both mental and spiritual, has to do with loving what your neighbor
asks of you. But when you love your neighbor more than yourself, then you are trying to be too
good. This is very typical of nuns, and some social sevens can also get into that kind of
stereotype of goodness, which consists of trying to be good according to a code or a social
consensus.

Perhaps humans today would be tempted to think that they have more rights than a cow, but
perhaps we are wrong about this too: deep ecology has something to tell us about it. But where is
the limit of goodness? There is a kind of kindness by applause, very typical of the social seven.

The word sacrifice with which Claudio Naranjo has traditionally labeled the social subtype of
enneatype seven portrays well a complacent and generous personality, capable of managing
projects and mobilizing energies for a certain purpose, to which he can give himself with great
dedication. This requires enthusiasm, idealism and social skill, and of all this he usually has in
abundance a sacrificed seven. Such a position before the world has many selfish compensations:
appreciation, recognition, good image, reduction of conflicts and create debts in the other (so that
in turn it treats you this well), finally generating interested relationships that end up devoid of
real meaning (yo-yú), and with a tendency to superficiality.
The guilt is hidden, rather projected, blaming others for their lack of commitment and dedication
(the latent complaint is: ―with what I have done... and how unjustly I am answered‖), or
reproaching himself for being naïve and delusional, for expecting so much from the human race.

But behind all this there is guilt for feeling so interested under the mask of good, for
manipulating through enthusiasm, for delegating excessively in the name of tolerance, etc. So he
begins to distrust his good intentions, to feel quite miserable and to make a mess between what is
altruism and/or selfishness.

The most notorious thing that has been falling is idealism, that mixture of illusion, good
intentions, idealization and naivety that works as an intellectual drug (a cognitive stimulant) for
action. With a shot of idealism you can maintain the energy and effort that all sacrifice entails,
otherwise, strength and dedication would decay, time would go on dreaming and not on doing.
And the social E7 is active, it is moved by ideals that it tries to capture in life, and that, generally,
refer to improving the world, whether from religious, socio-political, therapeutic budgets ... with
a certain sense of mission, not in the most tremendous version of messianism, but in that of the
visionary, the one who is able to imagine a freer world, or peaceful, or healthy or whatever
moves him. In this idealism there is a considerable component of rationalization and ideology,
almost always in favor of the change from the obsolete to the modern. If any of these creeds
proves wrong, it is changed to another, explaining this change as evolution.

Deep down there is a deep pessimism towards oneself, towards people and towards the world:
with a little more confidence in life it would not take so much indoctrination in one's own ideals
or so much effort to please and mobilize others with these ideals. Some of this is being
abandoned in exchange for greater and more authentic confidence.

● - provocative, enlightened, simplistic and comfortable when the task becomes too
demanding
● - may not understand the continuum... the present, in the here and now…
● - fantasy that everything has to be perfectly fun and that any pain, no matter how small
● - may have inability to recognize one's own and others' limitations in love

What is difficult is to humanize oneself, to see the other as such and not as an expression of your
unattainable models; all these are dreams, fantasies ideologized to avoid loving surrender,
without guarantees or reservations. Feel (emotionally and sensorially) instead of thinking and
imagining transcendent love, the one that makes you touch the heavens. That love, as a
transforming force, exists, it is a real and known experience. The mistake is not to accept its
gratuitousness and impermanence. To want to hold it back is to condemn oneself to limbo and
then sink into hell. The love aspiration is that of a perpetual infatuation, even denying that it is
impossible and exhausting to maintain such a level of exaltation.
The experience of maturity puts things in a less absolute place: the heart is generous and also
petty, love is sometimes unconditional and sometimes calculating, etc. And that psychospiritual
development will not end all imperfections, since, in addition, one puts oneself in the arrogant
place of feeling better than their partners and of waiting resignedly for them to evolve towards
perfection. This position conceals a poor internal opinion: the incompetence to love, the
limitations to trust and surrender. Without crossing these wastelands it is difficult to rebuild self-
esteem and become more permeable to love

―The most expensive thing is to be with an open heart... If I get paranoid, my internal dialogue
shoots up, I get angry and thus avoid feeling bad. That closes my heart and takes me away from
the world.‖ (X. Florensa) ―In the couple I have always had a high concept of commitment, I
have done the impossible to fulfill what I promised. This awareness of responsibility I think is
what makes it difficult for me to commit, and especially with a woman, since it will be for life.
Which, together with the idealization of women (the certainty that there is a better one) has been
a cocktail of difficult solution.‖ (J. Micó) ―My biggest difficulty is to surrender, to give myself.
Sometimes I feel like the situation of not having love is a punishment for not having taken it
when I had it.‖ (M. Gonzalez) ―Do not encapsulate or hide anger, anger, or narcissistic wounds,
which only seek false isolation and resentful loneliness.‖ (E. de Diego)

E7- Sexual
Talkative
The sexual E7 is a particular form of quackery. He tends to talk a lot, even more than the other
subtypes of the E7. He is a loquacious and talkative character, who does not stop occupying the
space with the word. It really does have a lot of struggles, you could almost say an inability to be
quiet, in a chatter that is defined by its superficiality, thematic dispersal, and inability to go
deeper.

Verbal incontinence, together with the speed and mental effervescence that it possesses, turn the
talk of a sexual E7 into a bombardment of words that ends up devastating in an almost hypnotic
chain of light ideas that, one after another, end up being heavy.

The underlying motivation is to release anxiety, and fill the inner void and the interpersonal
space with words. It is also a way to control one's own and others' emotions. What is important is
not so much what is said but the expression itself (language in phatic function). It's pure oral
incontinence. If a sexual E7 is asked about what he just said, he may have a hard time repeating
it, because he doesn't even listen to himself.

Grandiose and Exaggerated

He is a character with delusions of grandeur, who looks at life in a big way, who makes
excessive plans that he later cannot achieve... But that grandiloquence and exaggeration hides the
need for a look that will rescue him from his low self-esteem. He confuses being admired with
cultivating his self-love; hence, he measures his personal worth based on how dazzled others are.

His narcissistic self-inflation attempts to compensate for his schizoid inner emptiness and less
admissible feelings of unworthiness, insecurity, and guilt, of which he is often unaware. Deep
down, he reassures himself and self-indulgences so much, through the recognition of others, that
it is not surprising that he is defined as an “enchanted charmer.”

Exhibitionist
By exhibitionism we understand here that particular way of constantly attracting attention
practiced by the sexual E7. Both his attire (garishly colored, sometimes with feathers or exotic
accessories and, in general, not very discreet) as well as his way of moving and speaking denote
an intense activity aimed at becoming the center of attention. It is like a peacock, only with a
peculiar way of understanding elegance, which is not exactly what the canons command, but
rather that of a mountebank or a buffoon.

Invasive
His verbal incontinence and his exhibitionism make the E7 sexually invasive. With words and
gestures, he occupies the mental and even physical space of the other. Is capable of diverting
attention or the focus of the conversation by making parallel comments, introducing new
distracting incepts, with jokes that change the mood or simply blurting out some superficiality
out of context. Interrupts conversations, either directly or with encouragement sideways as a
whisper. He is an expert destabilizer of meetings or conversations that do not interest him or in
which he is not the center of attention.

He sneaks into parties where he hasn't been invited, shows up unannounced, takes places or
privileges he hasn't earned... Of course, once he manages to be attended to, he doesn't easily let
go of the place of centrality, food of his narcissism.

Impertinent and Cheekiness

It combines freshness with a shamelessness that reaches rudeness. He is capable of approaching
and confronting the source of power so equally, with such daring, that it borders on irreverence.
In his approaches, he is usually very direct and self-assured, even limiting the unpleasant effects
of his impudence with jokes and various complications, putting vaseline on at every step.

However, under his apparent friendliness and sense of humor, he has scathing and corrosive
words. In the irony he hides his competitiveness and even contempt and, aggressively, he
exhibits his dialectical skills to ridicule his opponents with devastating weapons. His impudence
comes from the incontinence of his desires, which they do impulsively, straight to what they
want immediately. It is a staging of their rebellion and indiscipline. Either by A or by B, the
focus is directed both at destabilizing the other and at attracting attention. Depending on the fear
that he has of the situation, and depending on the strength that he grants to the other, he will use
the style of covert rebellion, guerrilla warfare type, or the most open and daring, sniper type. It is
common that, in a conference or meeting, he interrupts the speaker, asking some incisive and far-
fetched question that nobody understands. It is possible that the subject does not interest him too
much, but he will abuse the word as a way to show off to the group.

The impudence of the sexual E7 can be such that he dares to preach what he lacks so much, that
is, being ethical and honest. It is not uncommon to hear him giving advice or moralizing, from
idealization, about what is correct. To remember here that the E7 suffers a direct influence of the
moralism, rigidity, and perfection of the E1. As the preacher Groucho Marx teaches: “The secret
of life is honesty and fair play; if you can simulate that, you've done it."

An oblivious clown
He can approach social situations with ease, aided by his low sense of the ridiculous as well as
the courage to use himself as a caricature. He is especially witty at making fun of himself. He has
little shame and makes fun of his own faults or defects as a way of taking iron from them. He is
adept at parodying his own life.

It would seem that the sexual E7 does not know how to be anywhere other than the joke. Always
sharpening everything, the sweetener, useful in so many moments, ends up cloying. The abuse of
humor makes him invasive, impertinent, and inadequate in many moments in which that attitude
does not apply.

Self-referenced
He is admiring himself through the fascination he provokes in others as a springboard to feel
above others, with aggressive and haughty attitudes. The more admiration you receive, the more
you come down and feed the belief that you are “special,” unique, and superior.

Such is the degree of self-referentiality that is the center of attention, and denies the value of
others, reduced to mere providers of admiration, a silent public that gives him the egoic pleasure
of capturing your interest.

Dreamer with magic thinking

It is usual for him to practice various esotericisms, parapsychology, or exotic religions, and to
surround himself with an aura of accentuated new age spirituality or practice healthy lifestyles,
or anything else designed to attract attention while giving himself airs of transcendental maturity.

Ultimately, he does not stop being a dreamer. Someone who needs to spend a good part of his
time in the fantasy worlds he cultivates, disconnected from reality, is oblivious to problems.

Pseudo-empathetic
Although he does not lack empathy to identify with others, and tends to be kind, humane, and
even emotional, his difficulty in connecting with a genuine interest in others is enormous. The
sexual E7 is a person with great affective disconnection towards those who return to him, an
aspect that, although he is not very aware of it, is one of the most painful for him. In the long
run, he feels alone and isolated, since he does not establish real contact but through his self-
image. And although he is inflamed by his abilities and triumphs, deep down he himself is aware
that he has no real achievements and feels internally fraudulent, quite insecure, and fragile.

Selfish
Like all E7, the sexual subtype can also be defined as selfish. The priority is the satisfaction of
one's desires, everything else is left behind in the order of priorities. He does not see the other;
only his own navel. And, of course, he believes that he doesn't need anyone to be well, that he
can only handle the vicissitudes of life... Without being the most tricky of the sweet tooth (title
held by the conservation E7), he is also a slave to his own desire and shows no scruples when it
comes to going for what he wants. Once he succeeds, there is also no remorse for the forms
employed, like the child who, unable to contain his frustration, went for the candy at all costs.

Fraudulent
Self-indulgence serves as a justification for fraud. The sexual E7 can tell himself and others any
kind of story, with the most unlikely alibis to justify his dubious behaviors. He lives in a kind of
chronic fiction, entertainment, and permanent comedy that ultimately allows him to do what you
want and when you want. And, unlike the conservation E7, he tends to believe his own lies, self-
suggesting them.

Explosive and Hypersensitive

A mental character but with an emotional tendency denied in the background. In his day to day,
hysterical tantrums are not uncommon, moments in which his understanding is clouded, and he
behaves like a small child who, not being attended to, explodes.

This feature also has to do with the general susceptibility of the E7. These are people with such a
high sense of their personal importance that anything offends them, and in the case of sexuality,
this jeopardy reaches the point of hypersensitivity.

Anti-hierarchical escapist
They tend to establish non-hierarchical, horizontal relationships, either with the subordinate or
with the boss. It establishes a colleague, a closeness, a complicity that, apparently, facilitates
camaraderie and trust. Their managerial style is condescending, giving permission for everyone
to say and do what they want, but delegating much of the responsibility for tasks to the
subordinate. Ultimately, he tends to hang himself, both procrastinating on his tasks and abusively
relying on his co-workers. Something similar usually happens in their personal relationships.
Head in the clouds
In addition to escaping from his responsibilities, he is absent-minded, a “freak” who usually
lacks grounding and the ability to get organized in the practical things of life. It is not very well
known where his head is or his existential priorities; what is clear is that his thoughts are not of
this world.

Childish optimism
He is an optimistic, lively, fun person... at least on the surface. He has already been designated
“the clown of the enneagram” for his immense ability to laugh and make a joke out of any
situation. In fact, most of the great comedians are sexual E7s.

Optimism and humor are not only at the service of highlighting the humorous side of situations,
but also affect the cheerful spirit of the sexual E7, in its liveliness and joy. Optimistic ingenuity
is the lubricant that allows the sexual E7 to glide through existence without the friction of living.

The sexual E7 has remained in that early stage in which the child laughs at anything. There is
still no broader understanding that anticipates the sufferings of life and, in the face of any face or
stimulus from the environment, the child returns a smile. The hope and joy of living is such that
it is only possible to smile with dedication and enthusiasm.

Impatient, Impulsive, and Intolerant of frustration

Although he anticipates a lot and acts from the mind, he is often carried away by his impulses.
The sexual E7 has a low tolerance for frustration and wants to be one step ahead of reality itself,
like a capricious child who, when he wants something, wants it now.

In permanent movement, jumping from one space to another both physically and mentally, he is
usually nervous and quiet, with a lot of physical agitation and difficulty staying in one place for a
long time. Internally it is also changeable and variable, easily alternating ideas and arguments.
Corporally, they are jumpy people, with zigzag, sharp, run over movements. They find it difficult
to sit or stay in the same position for a long time, they have difficulty stopping, being at rest.
This constant mobility even makes him frequently change his profession, address, partner...
Restless agitation is a mechanism to avoid contact with the inner world, where he could connect
with discomfort. It's like surfing the waves of life's discomfort, tiptoeing through situations.

Behind the impatience and speed is not wanting to get lost or give up anything. The sexual E7
believes that if it stays in one place (external or internal), or simply slows down, it will have to
give up fantastic possibilities in the world's great market. Stopping would also imply attenuating
the initial excitement that the new arouses and sustaining the boredom that the stability of the
known entails.

Hypochondriac
Avoiding suffering and repressing pain leads to hypersensitivity to any sign of physical
discomfort, which soon turns into constant worry. The sexual E7 has not received attentive and
adequate care, and has not found attentive listening on the part of the adults who had to protect
him. Let's say that, also in this sense, he has experienced abandonment.

Furthermore, by taking on a minstrel role to alleviate his mother's sorrows, he had to hide his
own. This lack of care and the fear of death itself cause, in the event of any physical symptom, to
enter a state of diffuse anxiety that can turn into hypochondria. This indeterminate form of care
on one hand reveals his deep fear and on the other, an attempt to take care of himself.

Hypochondriasis increases at the moment when, not having the ability to work through their
anxiety, it produces psychosomatic symptoms and a vicious circle is entered.

The sexual seven is not earthly, but heavenly. He is not interested in the things of this world. It is
the gluttony of the things of a higher and more advanced world. The sexual E7 is what we could
call a dreamer. To define it, Ichazo used the word suggestibility, which I understand as the
passion to imagine something better than the desolate reality. It is the passion to enthrall reality,
to fantasize, to paint things pink. In other words, it is a form of idealization. If the word for the
social E5 is totem — totemize is a type of super-idealization — here it is rather an idealization of
the common: the sexual seven looks at things with the optimism of those who are in love.

They say that love is blind. It could be that the sexual seven is blind in the same sense. He is too
enthusiastic. His passion is to dream, to go towards the sweetness of the imagined instead of
contacting the ordinary and not so interesting reality. Carl Abraham, a collaborator of Freud who
had a better eye than Freud for character description, spoke of a completely optimistic character
in every way: ―I‘m fine, you're fine, everything is fine.‖ And of course this can be very
therapeutic... for anyone who isn't a seven. Or, put another way: the virtuous life is good for
anyone who is not a nun.

● - may have a need to externalize those wonderful ideas and possibilities that arise in the
mind
● - the attachment to idealizations, fantasies, and suggestions
● - sense of being threatened or that life is like a jungle in which surviving is an
overexertion
● - many expectations and without putting so much excitement in the action or self-
suggestion that what will be done will be so exciting and spectacular; a self-confidence is
required in the face of that search for intensity and the extra in everything, in addition to
maintaining a lower level of activation, of excitement

Paradoxically, there is not so much interest in social relationships, in people, in contacts. With
the psychospiritual process, a greater awareness of the antisocial aspect of E7 arises. Now I have
more desire to be with myself or with my own, and not so much to discover those who are more
alien. What used to be a painful loneliness that translated into abandonment, marginalization,
rejection and fear, is now security, comfort, rest. The fact of enjoying greater honesty,
transparency and frankness in the expression of desires and needs frees from having to appear,
from looking good, which facilitates being able to enter and leave contact with others.

In my process, I have gone from feeling blocked for fear of rejection, to not being adequate, to
not knowing exactly how to behave (as if there were a right way, a being up to the task, at a
certain level that you are not sure to achieve) to trusting me more and giving me more credibility,
without so much invalidating and neutralizing judgment, without so much doubt or fear.

E7- Self-Preservation
Bon Vivant
As an expression of a life dedicated to hedonism, this character has the facility to feel good and
to feel that everything is fine, to seek pleasant terrain for himself and for others. His image is
usually neat, elitist, friendly, in polite ways, with which he reinforces the power of his seduction.
He likes to drag others into what he considers a good life: he wants them to have fun with him.
This is the nicest aspect of your handling, as well as a way to keep the image narcissistic.

Ironic, Cynical, and Sarcastic

The conservation E7 usually has a great sense of humor; have fun and laugh. He laughs happily
about almost everything; when it comes to laughter, nothing is sacred. The problem is that the
sense of humor is put at the service of contempt for the interlocutor, with what is put above, in a
clear display of narcissism.

He is irreverent, arrogant, mentally aggressive, and in this way he expresses his rage, almost as
an alternative to physical aggression, since he does not allow it. He is able to put his finger on
the sore spot with every word. He also knows how to laugh at himself, thus distancing himself
from his true emotions.

But above all, he is not afraid of others, which prevents him from taking them seriously.
Etymologically, “irony” has to do with dissimulating and playing dumb; “cynicism,” with
behaving like a dog; “sarcasm,” with cutting or biting a piece of meat. All this refers to a
disguised sadistic behavior and a tendency to mistreat trying to appear cordial.

Fear of suffering
The mantra of a conservation E7 might be: “First of all, avoid being uncomfortable.” There is in
this an anesthetic behavior in the face of suffering, a need to disconnect from the harshness of
life in order to maintain the fiction that the “childhood paradise” has not been lost. He despises
suffering as a thing for “unintelligent” people and, deep down, underlies an enormous fear of
returning to the deprived place of childhood, in which he experienced a strong sense of threat to
conservation.

Entitlement
As an extension of his narcissism, we can cite entitlement: a feeling of superiority rights because
of his talent and personal charm. It's subtle: the attitude of the E7 in a love relationship is
different from that of those who go through life important and assume a role of authority. In this
case, it is of a more subtle importance: it is not that he expects to be obeyed, but to be heard and
recognized as a person who is in the know. The man may expect the woman to be his audience;
the same happens with a father regarding his son. Correlative to the charlatan's need to be heard
is, naturally, his inability to hear, although he may not be aware of this himself, since he offers
great empathy through an attentive “countenance.”

Insatiability and Envy

A fundamental polarity in this character, is the opposition between the greedy insatiability, in the
foreground, and the fear of lack, which is denied.

Although it seems contradictory to the oral optimism of the E7, the conservation E7 tends to
compare himself and, therefore, to feel, unconsciously, envy. Who compares, suffers. And
although, unlike E4, there is a strong tendency to overcompensation that turns envy into
insatiability, the background sensation of lack and disadvantage is common, probably due to
having felt excluded or disadvantaged in childhood, which explains the voracity in their
relationships and the aggressiveness with which they take on the world. Feeling that his starting
conditions are less advantageous, he tells myself that he needs more and more to catch up or win.

Excessive and Aggressive

This measurement and comparison causes stress and anguish, and is a source of compulsive
behavior and all kinds of excesses. “Just as the miser does not want to part with something that
he feels is precisely scarce, the greedy person distracts himself in abundance: faced with the fear
of lack.” Excessiveness is the door to dispersion and, therefore, an inexhaustible source of
problems for this character.

The greater the gluttony, the greater the orientation to compare, and the greater the contact with
the feeling of insatiability, thus creating a feedback loop that lays the groundwork for the usual
manic co-depressive phases that this character usually goes through.

It is usual for the E7 to retain a certain degree of aggressiveness and a tendency to

possessiveness, seizure and even looting, which sometimes leads to confusion with the E8
character. They are tendencies related to their disposition: narcissism and impulsiveness, acting
before reflecting, risking everything to an art and, in general, a counterphobic attitude, even
psychopathic.
Utilitarian and Strategist
A good friend of the powerful, an effective propagandist, a highly perceptive planner and
strategist, the conservation E7 usually surrounds himself with people with the ability not only to
help him, but to make him prosper and carry out his projects and ideas. His utilitarianism occurs
in personal accounts, and could be defined as a feeling that friendship is only worth cultivating if
the friend is useful to his plans or interests, or if he finds it suggestive enough.

He usually deals with information, and uses strategies and tactics to position himself
comfortably. Look for ways to get what you want without asking directly and, above all, without
counting on others. And he is accustomed to making his responsibilities lighter by allowing
others to deal with them, charging them to such, in order to reach pleasure earlier.

Impatience and Boredom

He suffers predisposition and intolerance to boredom, allergy to everyday life and routines. You
need constant stimuli and new or extraordinary experiences, to the detriment of feeling pleasure
in everyday life. As background, a difficulty to connect with the emotion that causes a feeling of
dryness in life.

Obligation and responsibility, predisposed to flight or abandonment, no: there is a desire to

return to pleasure and freedom as soon as possible. It is also difficult for him to contact the
slowness, that is, with the natural flow of life, which is constantly forced, accelerated by the
planning ego, so as not to contact what is there, so as not to feel. Difficulty sustaining frustration
and giving space to emotions, immediacy and constantly accelerating walking (antagonistic to
the harmony of natural rhythms) are tools to avoid coming into contact with anguish and other
unpleasant emotions.

Insubordinate and Rebellious

The feeling is that accepting limits creates suffering. The authority has to demonstrate its reasons
or logic, so it ceases to be an authority: internally, the conservation E7 underestimates and
disqualifies it, despising and disobeying it. There is a fundamental distortion: “accepting the
authority of others limits my personal autonomy.”

He has a narcissistic taste in presenting himself as a rebel, while avoiding direct confrontation
with authority, to that: dodges or seduces, thus avoiding the consequences that entails would
contradict him.

Indiscipline and procrastination are inextricably linked to insubordination and rebellion. As a

background, the invalidation of the father in childhood is the engine of the invalidation of all
other authority, always identified as repressive or imposing. The limited capacity for self-
criticism further contributes to this scenario: there is difficulty in repenting, as well as little
tolerance for criticism from others. All this, reinforced by its aggressive mentality and its
tendency to be elusive.

Egotistic and Individualistic

The absolute priority is to satisfy one's own desires, with the feeling that others have to adapt to
their times and needs. In the conservation E7, narcissism has a lot to do with objectifying others.

There is a difficulty in seeing the wife as an entity separate from her own ends of exchange,
especially the couple as another separate from her interests and desires. The rest of the people,
those who do not belong to their own circle of trust, can be seen as a limit or a hindrance to their
plans (or, simply, they are not seen).

The inner feeling is that of a need for self-preservation. The crazy idea that “I can handle
everything, I don't need anyone” contributes to this scenario. And as background, search for
immediate pleasure without assessing the consequences for those around him. There is also the
crazy idea that giving oneself emotionally makes one gregarious and makes one lose
independence, as well as stop being “special” or “unique.”

Prone to corruption
Not even for some representatives of this character does this descriptor sound too strong, we can
subject the term “corruption” to a process of euphemization (typical of this character) and go on
to call “the tendency to take legal shortcuts” or to interpret the laws as indicative instead of to
respect its mandatory compliance. Underlies the light attitude towards life typical of all E7, and
especially the conservation E7.

“If one does not believe in anything, if one implicitly thinks that the authority is useless, that the
system is corrupt, then one must do what is best for oneself. And with a lot of people like that,
it's impossible for the community to function. When Socrates was offered to flee, he preferred to
give his life as an example of support for the ideal of democracy, to strengthen faith in the idea
that the people can govern themselves; that, even if he is wrong, one can in principle arrive at a
system in which wisdom prevails. How far we are today from that attitude!”

What would have done, instead of Socrates, a conservation E7?

Fraudulent and Charlatan

This character uses any available resource to achieve an end, both words and actions. Some of
the most used resources are lying, stealing, confusing others, cheating, intriguing others…

He has his own morality where benefits are imposed on acts or, in other words, he does not pay
attention to the means to achieve certain goals: purposes. For this, there must be a high degree of
self-indulgence, own laws, personal interpretations of good and evil; and, as they are laws of
their own, they can change so as not to sustain states of guilt, to adapt to each moment according
to the greedy need that arises. Added to this is his great ability to arrogate merits that do not
correspond to him, a strong desire for protagonism and a frequent imposition, mythomania and
fantastic pseudology, especially in the intellectual field.

The conservation E7 has become an expert at getting what he wants without asking for it. His
basic conception is that things are not achieved by asking for them: either they take them, or they
cheat or speculate to obtain them. You believe that asking puts you in a vulnerable position and
brings you closer to pain and frustration. There is in it, again, a disregard of the other. The
childhood experience of loneliness, isolation, abandonment, and survival contributes to
promoting this scenario.

Schizoid austerity vs. Seductive waste

At times, the E7 conservation shows a simplicity bordering on the greed of the E5. It tends to
have a great deal of control over the economy and go, as well as a constant calculation of costs
and benefits. He attaches great importance to money, and feels dizzy when he sees himself in
financial trouble. But his difficulty in spending is tempered by a great facility to invest, to do
“business,” sometimes a hint of megalomania. His practical sense permeates everything: he does
not want to complicate his life and tries to avoid everything that could be a source of displeasure.
In the background, there is a great ski fear mile to deprivation.

On the other hand, everything said is invalidated when, in his manic state, he pursues his objects
of desire. Then he can be foully wasteful, throw the house out the window, commit... Nothing
will be enough until he reaches the object of his gluttony. Again, this behavior has a lot to do
with his bipolar tendency.

Dryness
The intense mental life causes a physical disembodiment and a semiotic embodiment, bodily and
emotional dissociation where life is confused with words and speeches. Impervious to pain
makes you less permeable to emotions. There is a great fear of vulnerability that deprives you of
being receptive. In the background of so much excitement and noise of thoughts and words, there
is a frozen emotional world and the experience of a nuclear coldness. In the background, we find
the schizoid origin of this character. At the same time, the difficulty with admiring love, with the
spontaneous wonder at creation, complicates this panorama. Consequently, his attitude is more
openly pseudo-social or even antisocial than in the other subtypes of E7.

Sometimes he devotes himself to work to the point of becoming a worker, all based on his manic
or depressive mood. After moments of excessive workload, usually getting sick or going into
periods of depression or nervous breakdown. It is very difficult for him to trust the relationship,
and it usually takes a long time to establish deep bonds (when they are allowed), which can
quickly mutate a couple relationship from one first phase of strong seduction to another of great
emotional dryness, testing the patience of the other or another.

Untrustful and Skeptical

He feels distrust in the flow of life. He questions everything and has a certain degree of anger
with life, little manifested. Basically, it underlies the difficulty of character for devotional love
and recognizing the other. Similar to the E1, in the feeling that others are not trustworthy, that
people are imperfect, but without taking the trouble to try to correct others, conservation E7
isolates itself from the world in its particular garden: that of the “family” or the feeling of
involvement with a network to link, as a defense against a life that it understands as chaos and
that reinforces its idea that pleasure and non-stop are the only possible escape routes.

In addition, in someone who is a profiteer and lacks a broad sense of community, it is logical that
there is mistrust. He thinks that everyone acts like him and that, since there is no law that is
worth it, everyone will act with the same contempt for the rules. When he leaves aside for a
moment his manic tendency to worldly pleasures, a nihilistic background appears: he narcissistic
balloon is deflated, the schizoid background becomes clear, and disbelief and basic distrust of
life appears even more strongly.

Stubborn and Earthly

Beyond the tendency of all E7 to procrastinate, the conservation E7 often demonstrates tenacity
in overcoming obstacles and standing up to adversity based on nerve, will, and fury. An
irrational idea underlies: “I can handle everything.”

He has an obsession with being efficient, with obtaining the maximum rewards with minimal
effort. His mental agility helps him in this and his capacity for strategy.

Combat is split halfway between mental activity and physical action. He likes to feel that he is in
control of the situation, which not only reinforces his narcissism, but it also helps to drain the
anguish.

His tenacity can lead to disconnection from the body and its emotional needs, in addition, is the
most realistic variety of the E7, with a great predisposition towards skepticism, the material and
the earthly fruit of self-preservation. All this, in relation to its utilitarianism and advantage in
social relations. He doesn't behave like an idealist, but rather as someone disappointed with the
ideals, a pseudo-idealist or even an anti-idealist. He believes that by organizing himself well he
will be able to avoid the return of deficient states experienced in his childhood, and with this he
tries to annul the feeling of threat to conservation.

It is usually easier to recognize a sexual or social seven than a conservation seven. To refer to
him, Ichazo used the phrase „the guardian of the castle‖. He also uses the word „castle‖ for the
five conservation — I preferred to use the word refuge, lair. But what is the meaning of the
phrase „the guardian of the castle‖?

The E7 conservation is the person who makes alliances. Family could be an alternative word.
But not in the true sense of the term, which is full of positive connotations. The word family
describes an aspect of life. But, in the specialized vocabulary about the ego, there is a kind of
family game that can be played. In it, the seven conservation build relationships with people
based on ideas such as: „I will be family to you and I demand that you be family to me‖, „let's get
together, I will serve you and you will serve me‖, „together, we can create a good mafia
together‖…

I drop the word smuggling because this type of behavior can lead to cunning. It is a clear
partisanship. There is an element of corruption very present in it. Self-interest, selfishness, is
behind this alliance, even if it appears to be denied. Naturally, every ego form relies on a lie that
makes it appear that it is not there. That is why confession is so good, so interesting for the work
of the conscience — especially when the confession is public, because that is how one realizes
that one can go on with everything, remain the same.

So the conservation E7 is the opportunist, the person who has to find advantages, to profit. It is
as if a threat to conservation hangs over him that has to be compensated. Therefore, gluttony, in
this case, is expressed as an excessive concern to get out of this threat to conservation by making
good deals and deals with every opportunity.

A friend of mine was a dentist for part of his life. He seemed like a kind, friendly, talkative
person. Some are very fond of the dental profession because they have each other's mouths shut
all the time, so they can talk and talk as much as they want. Surely you have met very talkative
dentists. They may not realize it - unconsciousness plays tricks. And it is typical of the seven
conservation groups that they like to do something with their hands, something useful for others.
They are practical.

Talking and talking, the seven conservation soon discovers the other person's weaknesses. „I
have seen that you have bought a new car, how are you doing?‖, Says the dentist, „Well, it is an
excellent car, I am very happy with it‖ – answers the patient – „but unfortunately I have to sell it‖.
„Ah, well‖ – the dentist takes advantage of it – „then I'll buy it for you!‖

It seems that with the seven conservation there is no conversation that does not lead to business.
You do instant business because your mind is so alert to opportunity that you never miss it. His
position is that of one who thinks that if you are not alert, if you do not keep your nose in contact
with the wind to capture opportunities, you will be a loser.
It seems that what is left behind in the process is essentially a kind of anxiety, a state of
nervousness, of indefinite agitation that sometimes manifests itself as ―greed, impatience,
wanting to eat everything‖, as an E7 conservation says; others, like „a thought that maintains that
I can always focus everything from the positive; the desire to be surrounded by people that
anesthetizes me and allows me not to be aware of myself, to live asleep, in a dream‖, affirms a
woman with the same trait. It is also, according to another, „the sensation of a fictitious life, as if
lived outside of me. As a young girl I used to define it as if it were a movie; It was fast, funny, it
was the protagonist but I didn't recognize myself inside: I recognized myself as dissociated‖.
Sometimes it is „[fantasy,] understanding as such the fact of exchanging reality for what is
invented (of course, unconsciously), even going so far as to defend what is invented as reality,‖
according to another conservation E7. Others times, it translates into „always getting away with
it; to spend so much energy controlling everything, managing everything and not being noticed.‖

Likewise, the flight—often unconscious—from the dysphoric, from loneliness, from the
unpleasant, from emptiness, from boredom, from what little is left behind: „the desire to
constantly experience new things to avoid boredom and fill my time‖, affirms a seven
conservation; not touching unpleasant emotions, the feeling of already because life is over,
impatience, the need for everything to be okay permanently; „The excessive noise in my life,‖
adds another conservationist; „Believing that I am so good and generous, that I help so much,
believing that everyone depends on me, instead of me depending on them,‖ concludes another.

● - dictatorship of „this yes, this no, imperatively‖, and also to develop greater flexibility: to
stay in the „...or not‖
● - Count ourselves and others our own desires as needs.

E8- Social
The social E8 is a kind of social antisocial. If we want to use the categories of modern
psychology, the eight respond to the so-called antisocial personality: more or less, a person who
is against social norms. Or rather a rebellious person. But a social eight is a type that is only
explained in contradictory terms. It's like a child who became violent defending his mother
against his father. His violence arose from solidarity. He has resonated a lot with the phrase of
―thundering in the face of injustice‖.

The central theme of the social E8 was named by Ichazo as friendship. I do not like to use words
that have a universal meaning or that we can associate with great meanings to describe specific
games of the ego, since many times we end up using those words to justify these same games. So
I feel more comfortable with the word complicity. It has to do with the word loyalty, like that of
a child who allies himself with the mother to confront the father and who develops a strong
detachment from the paternal bond, for which he surely becomes a difficult child at school. He
rejects school because the entire institution is associated with a father-like authority, and he
comes to experience intellectual detachment because the intellect is equally part of the father
complex.

Not surprisingly, patriarchal culture is made up of intellect, authority, and impulse control.
Looking at the social eight with the mind of a Freudian, the concept of complicity will be better
understood. We could speak of an Oedipus complex. We could say that the boy needs the love of
his mother and that he has no hope of finding love in his father. Therefore, he concludes, ―I am
going to join with my mother against my father, I am going to protect mom, and I am going to
get mom's love.‖

If we go into Freudian psychodynamics, we might also add that this mechanism is not, after all,
composed of pure loyalty, but rather a matter of self-interest. But, for any person of this
character, it is very difficult to go beyond the felt experience of simple loyalty. If we were to ask
Karl Marx about the nature of his solidarity with the exploited, I don't think he would be
receptive to the Freudian reproach, that he would say that he simply ganged up with his mother
against his exploitative father. Or that his affinity with his mother was Oedipal and he had
something to do with his own need for love. It is difficult to make an eight aware of his need for
love.

We are all moved by love. Each form of disturbed personality is an alteration in the way we act
to find love. One acts too cute or too good at school, another is too perfect in his morality, and so
on. In an eight, it seems that the main issue is renunciation, the abandonment of love. He thinks
it's better to go for power, for pleasure, for what he wants, instead of waiting for love, instead of
getting sentimental. For an eight, people who are looking for love are sentimental. So an eight is
a character that veers towards the cynical, towards the rough, towards the harsh. Incidentally,
eights are not usually interested in activities related to self-knowledge, since it is a little harder
for them to develop this type of insight in their own emotional life: they have a lot of repression
from the soft side, as if they had had to bury their inner child to be able to go out to life in an
armed way, towards a struggle for existence, red in teeth and nails, as the Darwinists say. An
eight is someone armed to the teeth.

I didn't know what I wanted, I didn't know who I was, I felt lost in the middle of a very difficult
situation at home. I only lived to give my salary to mom and be defensive with my stepfather.
My existence didn't seem to make any sense. I think that's where I developed the most a very
great contempt for life itself; and at the same time I recognize that a desire for suicide also
appeared in me, but more as revenge, so that others may feel guilty. The desire to kill or for
someone to die was also constant.

Recognizing my enneatype, what first emerged were the madrizas: the pain, the helplessness in
the face of such heartbreaking situations that I lived, and hence the decision that it was better to
defend and take revenge than to lie on one's chest.
 ● - ―I hit you where it hurts the most, so that you are careful not to get into my territory.‖
● - It's something like: ―I can't hit you or kill you... but I kill you from my inner contempt
and I move everything around you so you realize what a shit you are, and I'll always be
there to remind you.‖
● - Jealous, gossipy, rude, lying, bossy... I have the intensity of a volcano!
● - Blindness is left behind. From lust, a great anxiety was always present that is now left
behind. Neither do I invite her or avoid her, she arrives and, from her, I recognize myself
as needy.
● - All this leaves me freer and less attached to relationships, teamwork, material or
spiritual things.
● - The disproportionate lust for projects is left behind: I seek to deepen the work that I
began ten years ago. I start to walk from a greater awareness, realizing when I want to
subdue someone or when I am manipulating.

―Recognize me!‖, is my childhood cry. Recognize me! I am just a very small girl, full of needs,
full of hunger for tenderness. Hidden tenderness, hidden under the shell of a turtle. Tenderness
that many times I hated to admit.

I have hidden my primary need: to recognize that I need to be loved in order to love myself.
Recognize myself, my shame of being a little dog. My fear of rejection and abandonment. Deep
down, my lack of commitment to a partner has more to do with the fear of abandonment. My
peculiar way of committing to the mission of the congregation to which I belonged is, in reality,
a path of search where, through service to others, I have found myself, with my own reality as
angel and devil.

My greatest suffering was the decision to leave the congregation to stand on my own two feet
and not knowing what I needed or what I really wanted. It was like being in adolescence again: I
lived with a lot of shame recognizing how twisted and tricky my life was, and it was very
difficult for me to see myself as I am.

E8- Sexual
A sexual eight has a tendency toward social detachment. He is a rebellious person, much more
than the other E8. He is also a more provocative person, who flaunts, who proclaims that his
values are different from the norm. This occurs with all eight, but in the sexual subtype, this
tendency becomes a clear detachment from the intellect. The word to define it is possession. And
I used to think that this also had to do with physical possessions, but later I realized that this
passion is limited to grabbing the other: the sexual eight is very possessive in his relationships.
This word also has to do with taking ownership of the entire scene: the sexual eight always wants
to be the center. It is always fascinating. Their power comes from a greater seduction, from a
greater power of fascination, which differentiates them stylistically from others. The other
subtypes do not have as many colors in the feathers. In relation to the other subtypes, the sexual
one is more emotional, while the conservation one is pure action and the social one is the only
intellectual eight.

The general impression is that none of them could express themselves as they were in childhood.
There was no affection, affection, attention, appreciation, recognition and much less respect.

Only one of the interviewees preferred not to say anything about his childhood, but from his life
story it can be assumed that he suffered a lot of disrespect and lack of affection and attention,
like the others. They all had difficulty writing about themselves. It seems indiscipline, but it may
be an excuse not to put yourself in the other's hands and not to reveal your weak points or show
your vulnerability. Four of them cited the fact that they did not recognize paternal or maternal
authority. They lost confidence, they felt betrayed and they refused to be guided by someone
who did not give them the necessary security. Hence the rebellion.

They all broke the rules of society, did not respect the laws of the world and disregarded the
divine laws as if they were immune to them. They are all antisocial, feel excluded and are
attracted to illegality, coating it with legality. Shyness is also present, but appears combined with
seduction, strategy and fear of being swallowed by the social. It is also a way of hiding
marginality.

One of the explanations that emerge consists of the need for dominance and power: since they do
not like or want to expose themselves, they need to know where they are stepping, which is a
form of control. Thus, they manage to hide their insecurity, their loss of value and their fear of
appearing weak. None of the women completed college or were interested in developing their
true talents. They all looked for adventures, challenges, risks and a lot of adrenaline; one of them
was involved in drugs. They are all masculinized women; they never paid attention to
appearance, vanity or image.

One of the men, despite considering himself vain, says that this vanity was functional for the
conquest of the opposite sex as a form of dominance or pleasure. And the other man interviewed
made no reference to image or vanity, showing that he does not give it the slightest importance.
Two of the interviewees (a woman and a man) looked for professions of power: one in the police
and the other was a police officer and today he is a surgeon. They are very generous when they
consider that the other deserves help. Otherwise, they disregard it as a form of punishment. They
all said —unanimously— that, through intentional personal work, they had discovered new ways
of relating to their partner, family, work, and other people in general.

Possession/dedication and sexuality, anger/intolerance, intensity/excess, histrionics/rebellion. All

sexual eights voraciously sought out love, sex, and excessive pleasure in life. It was a form of
rebellion, as if everyone had been deprived of their dreams, their desires and their sensitivity.
Without a doubt, they could develop an armor to hide the devaluation. During childhood they
were forced to do what they didn't want to do, they were disrespected and they had an
authoritarian father or mother. They behaved differently inside and outside the house, because
they did not have the right to be as they were. ―When I was eight years old, my sister got
married. I stayed at home with three brothers and my father. The three women in my life
disappeared at the same time and I was left alone with men and with the feeling of fear of being
abused and not respected; I felt profoundly alone‖, tells us C.

As creatures, since they were not recognized for their sensitivity and matured very early, they
began to rely on the value that things have in the world and not differentiate between people and
material things. As adults, today, they buy what childhood dreamed of.

The value given to material things and people was not intended to supply any type of material
security, but rather to gain power over them. They do not mention that possessing serves for
sustenance or for security in life; Quite the contrary, the five come from rich and/or powerful
families, linked to politics, ranching, civil construction, etc.

All, without exception, were possessive people in love relationships or with friends, things and
situations

―When I was little I had the clear feeling (I think it's a crazy idea) that the world started to work
when I arrived. Everything belonged to me,‖ says G.
―Since I was little I turned to the material. People were worth what they possessed and not what
they were. I was educated that way: totally focused on having and not being. There was this
crazy idea that everyone and everything has a price, no matter how much,‖ says A.

Taking/giving is related to sexuality. It is perceived that there is moralism in this, that it is only a
game to protect himself and the other he appropriates. All out of fear of betrayal and loss, as if
the other were an object. Hence the difficulty in accepting any Dionysian behavior when dealing
with someone. Sexual E8s control the partner by completely dominating them, distancing them
from friends and acquaintances, making them dependent. They demand fidelity and a lot of
coherence and get very angry when this is not the case. This shows a capacity for control and
power over the other, as if they were their owners, their masters and responsible. Thus they
satisfy even more their possession, which feeds revenge, which strengthens lust, creating a
vicious circle.

They were deeply angry, intolerant of weakness, dependency, and slow, dumb people. It made
them impatient to the point of histrionics and explosion, sometimes causing situations of physical
aggression. Everything happened very quickly because of the speed with which they reached
their own conclusions, without even listening or allowing the other to defend himself.
E8- Self-preservation
The most armed of all the E8 is the conservational. The word that corresponds to it is
satisfaction: ―I have to have it. This is mine. I have to have it." It is more an intolerance of the
frustration of what he wants to have than the actual having of it. In this sense, it is somewhat like
a characteristic of the sexual E1, who is also obsessed with the desire for him. But an E1 is very
different from an E8. One is hypersocial, while eight is completely antisocial. One is too
concerned with the rules and the other too little. The E8 conservation pursues the satisfaction of
your needs. He doesn't usually talk much. It is like a lion. A lion only moves when it is hungry. It
seeks to satisfy its unsatisfied hunger and then sleeps for the rest of the day. Very majestically.
It's like no nonsense, no words, no puns in a conservation eight. We could say that his need is
that of exaggerated selfishness.

They are the people who know how to do business and know how to haggle to get ahead of
everyone. There is the expression: a used car salesman. That is the art or the talent of the eight
conservation. But it is also his need: he is a survivor, a term that has been used for eights in
general, but is more indicative of the conservation eight. He knows how to survive in the most
difficult situations. He knows how to get things, how to get away with it.

We must also assume that this compulsive movement only responds to intolerance, frustration
and anguish, and that, deep down, it is nothing more than a desire for revenge for which we do
not even know why. It is healthy, therefore, to open up to the understanding that something must
be covering up this compulsion to attack, since there are no objective reasons to attack

E9- Social
Social and friendly
The Social E9 makes friends easily. However, there is always a feeling of precariousness in his
belonging to the group. He feels good in the company of animals and children, for they are very
accepting and honest.

Good host
The Social E9 likes to organise informal meetings with friends, and is a very good host. In the
same way, he is a very attentive guest who is always willing to lend a helping hand with
preparations. In addition to partaking in all kinds of groups and hobbies, the E9 likes to go out to
parties and to travel. Participating in social events satisfies the need to belong.

Emotionally intuitive
The E9's emotional intuition often allows him to be an emergent of the group. He is easily able to
express and verbalise the attitudes or movements not expressed by others.
Chatterbox
These people are often very talkative in group settings,. When they do not feel fully merged with
the group, they can be quiet, but still attentive to what others want from them. They have great
senses of humour, and frequently crack jokes and recall funny anecdotes. On the other hand, this
humour can also be used to soften contact between others.

Hyper-availability
Activity and over-availability can lead to depression and even physical illness, as the Social E9
continues to live for others while neglecting his personal needs.

Tendency towards addiction

In the E9 social, there is a tendency to be addicted to drugs like alcohol. It starts off as a social
dis-inhibitor, which makes conversation easier and acts as a means of narcotisation. This type
also finds pleasure in sports, especially during youth, and so it is much more athletic than the
other subtypes of 9. But it can also be obese. The weight of the E9 social will reflect his mood,
gaining weight when depressed.

Workaholism
They are hard-working and tend to do more than is needed of them. Responsibility is lived
through a commitment to the tasks at hand. At the same time, they want to take care of the whole
world and make them happy, taking on requests from others without judgement or opposition.
Their identification with the task, their desire to be useful, the emphasis on efficiency at work
and the desire to be recognised for what they do will sound like the E3 Conservation. Both
subtypes are quite extroverted and both are indeed workaholics. There are also Social E9s who
try to take care of their image, seeing it as important to gain social acceptance. The basic
difference between these two is that the Conservation E3 hopes to shine through his efforts and
persona, whereas the Social E9 hopes to receive a sort of metaphorical membership. Another
difference is that the E9 Social has less foresight compared to the E3 Conservation, and is more
likely to think after acting.

Impatient and impulsive

This character may be too quick to jump into action without reflecting or considering problems
or issues. This impulsiveness allows the E9 to be out of touch with his emotions, and also let him
rush away from his inner world as fast as possible.

Responsible and collaborative leader

Social E9s tend to hold positions of responsibility, but because they do not fully believe in
themselves, they will only hold a position of authority if it matches with the will of those
"beneath" them. They usually assume a kind of horizontal leadership, since its tendency is
naturally collaborative and includes others in its projects. They are often practical when solving
problems and always try to find collaborative solutions. They like working in teams and believe
that competitiveness, envy, and squalor are bad things for practicality. In work they are very
good companions to their peers, but will be hesitant to help their inferiors.

Contrary to abuse of power

In vertical relationships, the Social E9 is often loyal and devoted to the authority figure.
However, he is very opposed to the abuse of power and conflicts he considers to be socially
unfair. They strike a chord with he who is guilty of abuse or hypocrisy, and will often position
himself against it without considering the consequences.

Curiosity
The Social E9 will be unnaturally curious about what is going on around him, which can lead to
being easily distracted. This is a reflection of his lack of inner experiences, something shared
with all 9s. Everything is interesting in this world, of course, but the E9 Social supplements all
kinds of introspection and inner experiences with an extreme curiosity about the outside world.

Clueless
Forgetfulness is frequent in this type, which is to be expected as they cover so many activities in
such a short period of time. It is very difficult for them to recognise their own limits. It is often
difficult for them to admit that they don't feel like doing something, and this can often boil over
into unconscious aggression that replaces the confrontation that they want to avoid. They may
also withdraw and abandon people for seemingly no reason.

Idealist
Closely linked to the unconscious feeling of exclusion is a distinctive strong belief in social
justice. It is not uncommon to find Social E9s in social programs, taking up positions of
responsibility to help society's most vulnerable. In his drive to improve the world and feel like he
is a part of it, he can easily adopt and conform to external values. He can adopt the values of any
group with sincerity and conviction, and he sees this as a way to channel his idealism. However,
they will have difficulties in dealing with in-fighting, or may lack the ability to question the
ideals of the group. E9 Socials will often "Fight another person's war," sincerely endorsing the
claims of others. Sometimes the curiosity, combined with the utopian idealism, lends this
subtype towards esoteric paths or other outside distractions that lead the E9 away from himself.
There is a tendency to get lost in the clouds, to converge with cosmic energies and to get lost in
universal archetypes. A crazy idea of the Social E9 is that he has no authority over himself, that
anyone may impose their will on him and he cannot say no.

Ingenuous
If naivety is common in the E9 Social, then this can lead to them often staying in situations they
do not want to be in. Many Social E9s speak of their indecisiveness of when to create intimate
ties and establish friendships, which is reflective of their deep need to belong.
The social nine is a good-natured person. And what moves a good-natured person? What is
behind these cheerful and light-hearted people? According to this map, the passion of E9 social
is participation. What you need is to feel part of it. But anyone who has an intense need to do, to
become part of something, is a person who does not feel part of anything.

For the social E9, the experience of not fitting in, of feeling different, of believing that they do
not have what it takes to be part of a group or a community, leads them to overcompensate, to
express a kind of generosity, being very attentive to the others and the group. It is a character
very gifted in satisfying the needs of others. And he becomes a good leader. The best type of
leader, in the sense of being a good person, generous and sacrificed in the face of any type of
responsibility that others want to give him. His passion is to do what is necessary to pay the toll
that allows him to be admitted to the group. But, for this, a lot of effort is needed: the social E9
are the workaholics of the enneagram.

They feel that they have to give a lot, but at the same time they have to be nice and pleasant. His
internal motto is: ―do not show the pain, do not put weight on the mind of another‖. His
expression is more happy than sad, but that does not mean participation, but a kind of partial
participation: a substitute.

In other social E9 partners, the active beginning of the search is marked by a painful event. And
this pain, in many cases, is caused by a separation: estrangement from parents and children,
estrangement from partners... The separation may be due to death or the breakdown of a
relationship. But, in all cases, the most significant person for a social nine ceases to be present in
her life, and this triggers a conscious cataclysm, like the one described by a young woman of the
social nine enneatype referring to her partner:

The fear of losing what I had (my partner, my daughters) and how blind I had been for years, too
focused on the world of work, with positions of great responsibility, believing that I had
everything under control when, in reality, it was quite the opposite: my daughters had problems,
my relationship with my partner was completely deteriorated...

Or it manifests itself with an appearance of symptoms, such as that of a woman who describes
how, following the death of her father, she begins to suffer from panic attacks that lead to a
paralyzing agoraphobia. In most cases, the person causing the pain complied with giving a sense
of identity and reality to the social nine, who frequently doubt their own existence. In the
descriptions of the before and after starting the process that the nines make of themselves,
phrases often appear (I quote verbatim) such as: ―I did not feel that I existed‖, ―I did not exist‖,
―I had a life full of things... but without me‖.

However, I am constantly attacked by the idea that I don't belong, that I haven't sufficiently
earned the right to be there, that I don't sing as well as... It's totally unreal, a fantasy. I can see it
and I can laugh, but it's kind of a recurring thought, especially if I'm touchy or any difficulty
comes up.

I had a hard time dealing with conflict situations. In fact, I had a hard time seeing them. I could
have people around me who hurt me, who attacked me, and I had an enormous capacity for
endurance, I didn't realize it, I acted like a punching ball, and I let myself receive the blows
without acknowledging receipt. Now I clearly perceive the attacks; I know when something hurts
or hurts me. This has especially happened to me with my partner: it has been hard to accept his
revenge mechanisms (and mine). Setting my limits, defending myself, approaching difficult
conversations, are things that I did not know how to do before and that I now do much better.

Before I controlled much more than now. Things had to be a certain way. At work, with
collaborators. At home, with my daughters and with my husband... I organized, I ordered...
Everything had to be done as I said. He did not trust, he had to intervene, supervise everything. I
still have a lot to learn here, but I am slowly letting go, controlling less and trusting more.
Accepting that there are other ways of doing things, that my way is not the way. That my oldest
daughter's lifestyle, for example, is neither better nor worse than mine.

Before, she intervened all the time in her life, in her things, in the way she acted. Then I stopped
intervening, thinking, however, that she was wrong, that she was not doing things correctly. Now
I accept that she has her own judgment and I respect her decisions... almost always. A
characteristic in my life was always that of not feeling belonging. I was a sandwich girl (the
median of five), I didn't belong to the older group nor to the little ones. I have always had to do
something extra to feel entitled to be in groups and I have never seen myself totally integrated: it
was a longing that was not satisfied, a fantasy that had no correlation with reality. For example, I
have been a founding member of a choir for ten years and one of the oldest singers, I am the
president and I have a special relationship with the director, with whom we have been good
friends for twenty years

I had my entire instinctive world denied: desire, sexuality, my inner child. This work has been
the most difficult part for me, because it meant breaking a family mandate, dealing with
something that I experienced as very threatening and dangerous.

From the very tension of these impossible lives, dominated by self-forgetfulness, arises the
necessary energy for the social E9 to undertake the search. Sometimes almost magically, by
chance, as an emergency measure, or as a matter of survival.

E9- Sexual
Very patient
The sexual E9 is very patient when it comes to tasks, things or relationships in which he
believes. Of a patience that may seem infinite to others, but that for him is normal. With children
and animals, his patience is extreme. This patience testifies to the need to maintain energy
homeostasis in oneself and with the environment so that there are no frictions that could put you
in contact with needs or choices.

Without nuances
Either black or white. He believes that several "versions of everything" cannot coexist. For
example, in interpersonal relationships it is difficult for him to understand that there are parts of
a person that he does not like, or that he likes less. Both in relationships and in the manifestation
of their tastes, there is a middle way, things are white or black, or all or nothing, or they like
everything or they do not like anything.

This vision hides the defense mechanism of denying what can produce negative emotions and,
above all, it nourishes the false image of a world that is going well at all costs, for which there is
nothing missing.

Tolerant with the other, severe with himself

In others, he tolerates everything and finds justification for any act or behavior. (Although inside
he has judged first but, from his desire for kindness, "magnanimously understands and
forgives".)

With himself, on the contrary, he is severe, critical and does not go too far. In private life as well
as at work, he does not forgive himself for any mistakes. The annihilation experienced in
childhood and the devaluation received in primary relationships are completely introjected.

Chameleon
Like the chameleon, it is capable of being in any environment and context without being out of
place. You can keep any conversation going by carefully following the other person's train of
thought. From early childhood he acquires the ability of entering and leaving situations and
environments without being seen. The imperative is to be there but without disturbing.

Above authority
Either he considers it worthy of respect or he does not recognize it. This aspect is very evident
from an early age, when faced with a teacher or parent who has not earned his respect, he does
what he considers most fair, does not listen to authority and acts on his own behalf. He makes a
judgment and appraisal according to wholly personal criteria of that person's merit and ability to
perform that role, and then acts accordingly.
But this force to go against authority does not come from the feeling of entitlement. Rather, it is
an action driven by defending another or by one's own survival, an acting out by which the
experience of low self-esteem can be skipped.

Blind faith
It is difficult for the sexual E9 to believe in someone because he does not believe in himself. But
when she finds someone to believe in , she gives in , she does it blindly and rarely questions.
Rather than faith, it would be better to say that it converges with the other.

Mediator and peacemaker

Not only does he not like to be involved in arguments and conflicts, he does not even tolerate
witnessing them. He is stronger than it: when there is an argument, he compulsively triggers the
need to placate and fix the situation. He gets in the way without even assessing whether he is in a
position to sustain the mediation. The imperative is to quickly regain calm and peace. He doesn't
take anyone's side but he manages to assert everyone's reasons and, sometimes without even
knowing how he does it, he always manages to achieve his goal.

The sexual E9 empathetically and exaggeratedly feels the pain present in the conflict. The
suffering is unbearable for him, he feels the unresolved internal conflicts resonate and so that
these do not take priority (understood as the resolution of his internal conflict), he immediately
acts on the external world. This terror of conflict often has autobiographical resonances. He is
willing to avoid it at all costs because in his childhood the overt conflicts had devastating
consequences for him.

Aversion to change
If there is one thing that triggers a crisis in the sexual E9 and triggers all the alarms, with the
corresponding paranoia, it is change. He does not understand why there is a need to change when
things are working so well. Fierce supporter of the saying "the best is the enemy of the good", he
applies it as much as he can, and to everything. He needs the usual customs, the usual people, the
usual places; in short, let no one disturb his quiet, flat little world for which he has worked so
hard.

Accurate in the development of tasks

The word "accurate" may fall short, almost maniacal and especially at work. Whether he
performs tasks at the bottom of the organizational pyramid or at the top, the sexual E9 is
extremely reliable due to his need to always have everything in its place. If a work program is
prepared , it must be fulfilled , and if there are changes it goes into crisis and is not very elastic.
It does not support the delays of the others, because they are an “unexpected variable” of the
program.

Lover of good food as a shared pleasure

The sexual E9 loves good food and good wine, but only if he can enjoy it and share it with the
person he loves or with his closest friends. He doesn't usually care much about what he eats, and
he doesn't like to cook for himself either. Food and drink are a pleasure if they are shared and
prepared for someone. When he is alone, on the contrary, they can become a way to fill the void
caused by loneliness or the discomfort of doing things for himself.

Dormouse
He has a very deep sleep because he uses sleep as a defense to not feel.

Difficulty for physical contact

The sexual E9 does not like physical contact, he does not like to be touched. When talking about
this, his idea is that everyone should be in their space. In reality, he does not have the experience
of safe skin contact with her mother who, on the contrary, has often been invasive and not
respectful of even physical limits. He has not learned to measure personal space.

Ashamed to communicate his feelings

He is ashamed to express his affection because he has not been taught to do so. The few times in
his life that he has tried to be explicitly emotional, has been deeply hurt or has received a
humiliating indifference, and it is a risk that he prefers not to take again.

Incapable of making decisions

The sexual E9 is not able to decide for himself, because he does not know what he likes and that
is why it is impossible for him to know what is better. He lets others decide everything, even the
important things. Although he will be angry if the decision does not seem fair to him, he will
abide by it without raising the slightest objection.

Bad relationship with the body and sexuality

He has a terrible relationship with his body, he does not accept its forms or its aesthetics. He
feels awkward, ugly, and thinks that no one will ever be attracted to him. That is why he forgets
that he has a body, and the disconnection of desire from him contributes to his total focus on the
pleasure and sexuality of the other.

Overadapted
No matter what happens or what others choose, you will always see the positive side and adjust
your needs accordingly. The sexual E9 has learned to adapt to circumstances for fear of being
abandoned, excluded, rejected and ignored. And this ability becomes a currency to be loved. In
reality, it is a false adaptation, which generates a silent rage that accumulates. This anger , of
which he is not aware , ends up expressing himself in a stubborn opposition to the other's
proposals, posing impediments that are generally of a practical nature , in a kind of displaced
revenge.
Indispensable and docile
The sexual E9 works tirelessly to make himself indispensable to the people around him
(relatives, friends, acquaintances). Compulsively, he immediately answers "yes" to any request,
even if it has just been outlined, without taking the slightest account of his capacity, his
psychophysical availability, the eventual effort to be made or, lastly, his needs. Also in this case
it is the price to pay for not being abandoned.

Empathetic
Believes that he always knows with absolute certainty what others need (he does not know what
he needs). He is amazed that the others do not have that characteristic to the same extent. When
someone does not understand him, he immediately blames himself for that inability that, in
reality, is not his. He does not feel loved then, he suffers and is filled with rage. It never crosses
his mind that the other might not instinctively possess that empathetic capacity that he considers
universal.

Welcoming
Creating a comfortable environment , being open to welcoming the other, being hospitable and
affable, using a voice that can be pleasant and friendly, and showing unlimited availability, make
the sexual E9 well accepted in his environment. He acts like this because he feels the need to be
welcomed by his fellow men and, above all, because he believes that, otherwise , no one would
love him. Ultimately, he believes that he is not lovable for himself but for the attention he
provides.

Sense of duty
The sexual E9 has such a strong sense of responsibility that he often takes on what does not
belong to him. The motivation is twofold. On the one hand, he feels that all the obligations of the
world fall on his shoulders (it is up to him to ensure that everyone fulfills his duty). On the other
hand, he thus prevents himself from experiencing excessive pleasure in situations that might
even procure it.

Susceptible to criticism
He always expects praise, recognition in almost all the activities he does. If he gets criticized for
something he has done, he falls from the clouds with a start and suffers horrors. Indeed, the work
that he does with dedication and commitment has value because it is through him that he can be
recognized by the external world. His work therefore has a double function of expression and
recognition. The sexual Nine believes that he exists only through what he does, and not simply
because he is.

Disorganized or extremely organized

He lives a disordered life inside (ordering himself would mean looking and suffering for what he
sees) and for this reason his house is also completely untidy. Surprisingly, he also lives the ideal
of being highly organized. He knows that he has a great chaos inside him, he would never want
to deal with it, but he dreams that, with a blow of the sponge, everything will magically fall into
place and nothing will be left out of place.

Loquacious or mute
In environments with many people (parties , groups , congresses , assemblies), the sexual E9 can
be very talkative, because he can not stand the discomfort of silence. He therefore feels obliged
to relieve others of what he feels as density "breaking the ice" as soon as possible. He does this
by walking up to someone and starting to talk. He experiences the sensation of saying things that
are irrelevant and uninteresting, of being verbose, but he can't stop. He would love to observe
the others and remain silent himself. In fact, if there is a lot of noise, he can be quite quiet, and
even not answer if he is addressed.

Breaking the silence obeys a second motivation. If you start talking you will stop feeling outside
the group - and therefore an object of attention - and you will be able to dissolve into it. The
sexual E9 has difficulty feeling really part of the group, he always thinks that he is not up to the
task, or that his characteristics will not be valued, or that there are already subgroups in which it
will not be possible to enter and that, in any case, he will not will be accepted.

Inconstant
Makes precise projects and acquires commitments that he later postpones and sometimes forgets.
Programs that seem to have the highest priority for a time suddenly and for no apparent reason
lose interest and fade, replaced by the birth of other urgencies. The sexual E9 acts this way
because it indefinitely postpones the satisfaction of its own pleasure. Although at first he moves,
and in good faith he believes that he truly feels desires, then the inner dictation of not giving
himself pleasure arises. He believes that there is no room in his life for pleasure, and that he only
has a reason to be duty.

Pedantic
Has an opinion that he firmly believes, and sometimes expresses it forcefully even if he hasn't
been asked, extemporaneously. He is so convinced that he has carefully and correctly analyzed
the problem that he makes absolute certainty about it, even though he is spectacularly wrong.
The desire to assert himself is not connected with an integrated construction of his opinion.

Disheveled
The sexual E9 takes little care of his external appearance. She dresses without paying too much
attention to the harmony of some garments with others and, if she is a woman, she rarely puts on
make - up and seldom goes to the hairdresser's. He doesn't care about her aesthetics.

This carelessness is also manifested in the lack of care for their health, when they delay control
visits to their doctor and when they ignore, neglect or forget symptoms that may indicate the
appearance of some disease. Plain and simple, he forgets himself so much that he does not take
care of himself at all.

Autonomous
Not depending on anyone is an absolute need of the sexual E9, which is in conflict with the need
to bond symbiotically. As a child, he could not trust the adults around him and learned very
early to fend for himself and to reduce his demands more and more, to appear before the world
serene, peaceful and unassuming. The motivation is, once again, to ensure the love of others,
because if you are not a burden to anyone, you do not run the risk of being rejected. The price
you pay is not realizing the lack of independence deep in your feelings and motivations.

Hyperactive or distracted
As we have already seen, the sexual Nine sets in motion an «all or nothing» mechanism, in this
case oscillating between periods (weeks or hours) of great industriousness and periods in which
he wanders and dazzles himself with hobbies of diverse nature that manage to distract him
(television, card games, music, books). In both modes, remaining in a superficial state prevents
her from contacting his inner world: she is aware that it would be too dangerous and painful.

I would prefer to use the word union — the word Ichazo used — in a higher sense. Union means
the response that we find in love, the desire for communion with the loved one. So such a word
should not be used to describe a neurotic game. Therefore, I prefer to use words like fusion,
confluence, symbiosis... The sexual E9 experiences the need to be through the other, the need to
be through union with another, through fusion with another person.

He uses the relationship to feed his being because he can't stand on his own two feet. A true
union would require the two people to walk on their own two feet before they actually meet. But
in this case a kind of substitution takes place. Because these people do not have their own place,
their own being, and therefore they want to be in the world through the other. This makes them
very affectionate people, but it is a suspicious affection, like one of the many forms of surrogate
love that occur in the ego's repertoire. What stands out in the sexual nine is that they belong to no
one: they are people who do not fully live their passion — in the best sense of that word.

They are precisely too dispassionate. When the Beatles wrote the song “Nowhere Man”, perhaps
they were referring to someone of this character. In Spain there is the ―dead mosquito‖: no one
would notice that person, it is confused with the design of the wall paper. In English it is said
that there are people who are like the flowers on the wall: they get lost in their surroundings.

Elias Canetti wrote a book about characters called “The Listening Witness” and described
someone who is obviously a sexual nine: ―The Legacy never asks for a certificate and wouldn't
get one either, since he's not going anywhere on his own business, he doesn't need them. It is true
that he eats, but he does it in moderation and without causing discomfort. Nobody has seen him
with his mouth open, he has the good sense to do it in a corner, without noise. He surreptitiously
feels his teeth, he still has a few left‖. It is a very cruel characterization: this person betrays his
needs so much, is so focused on satisfying the needs of the other, that he has few teeth left.

―People take a lot of photos on trips, and sometimes, when they don't have time to step aside,
he's in the picture too, uninvited. The owner's family looks at her and makes a face. But also in
those cases you can trust him. He himself takes the reels to develop and, when he returns with
the photos, he has disappeared from them. How he does it is a mystery, they don't ask him and he
doesn't explain anything, the important thing is that the owner's family stays like that in the
family and the Legacy doesn't appear anywhere‖. All this is a result of the need for fusion. You
can merge with another person, with a group, or even with your own body. But at the cost of life,
of the subtle level of life…

Inside of me there is a space that is sorely needed. And what this place does is take all the energy
inside, until it disappears. The feeling of belonging to the world disappears and the feeling is that
I live on Mars, not on Earth. And the sounds of the Earth reach me from afar.

● - We all do things without awareness, without connection, without love.

● - situation of deep reality, my disconnection is manifested, my living on Mars
● - Everything emotional was chaotic and always overwhelmed me
● - I became an intense, abandoned, hysterical and crazy woman. But I couldn't separate
myself. She was glued to Fernando.
● - I always wondered why I am so invisible to men. And I realized that I don't see them.
The one who was not allowed to have one for me was myself

Primarily abandonment. Leaving, disconnecting is my primary strategy for survival. My

voracity, confluence, deflection, insatiability, orality. My loss of contact with myself. Because
the contact is too painful, because what I find is too big a void, there is nothing there, there is no
containment, there is only a great space without limits. The place between Mars and Earth is too
uninhabited, lonely and cold.

I feel a lot of anger that I don't know how to express: then I bite, scratch, growl and scream. I feel
melancholy at five in the afternoon. I can't resist being scolded. I can't resist it. I can't resist being
denied something. I have no limits and I don't know how to receive or set them. I don't know
how to receive. I don't know how to give. I begin to give so that they love me, to be generous
with others without having for myself or mine. And I don't know how to receive or ask for
myself.

I do not exist. I have no right. I don't show up. I have no affection. I have no empathy. I am very
envious... I do not recognize my tenderness. I do not recognize my fragility or my vulnerability. I
can with everything. I take everything. I am the tough one.
I seek pain to feel alive. I hurt myself. I'm a masochist. And if you hurt me, I hurt you more with
my indifference

I get scared. There is something very hard in my lack of affection, in my indifference, in my

indolence, in my judgment, in my non-acceptance of my body, of my sexuality, of me, in my
feeling ugly, in my dressing ugly.

―She wants to bite, she swears, she blasphemes, she curses, she is cruel, inhuman, arrogant,
indolent, impatient, very irritable, impatient. Sometimes the aggressiveness turns against itself,
with a tendency to commit suicide. She reproaches and reproaches herself. rude Feelings of guilt,
remorse. Constant fear of everything. With shocks. She has an aversion to answering questions.
Gossipy, reserved. She laughs constantly or excessively. Premenstrual hysteria. She talks about
religious topics. Erotica. Exuberant joy or restlessness. Difficult to focus. Confusion. Great
veneration and respect for those around her.‖

E9- Self-Preservation
Renunciatory
It is repeated in the life of the conservation E9 letting things happen (God will provide), and a
lack of determination and diligence when facing the day to day. This strategy is based on the idea
that there is something bigger that decides for you what has to happen or not. In this surrender
there is a part of acceptance that can be considered healthy and even wise, and at the same time,
a harmful resignation that is the essence of this lazy personality unable to act according to their
own desires and needs.

Distant
Acidia or laziness leads you to postpone more intimate relationships with loved ones (siblings,
friends ), prevents you from developing affection, respect, fraternity, and ends up causing
distance with those people who are really important to you. In reality, the experience or the sense
of not existing and not seeing oneself is reflected in a difficulty in feeling the existence of the
other; don't see it. Loneliness and frustration then appear.

Positive in imagination
Reading love stories and watching romantic comedies or dramas replace the love that does not
live; it is as if he lived the life of others and was already satisfied seeing that they are happy even
though he is not; that gives him the possibility of thinking that although he lacks love today, then
someday it will be possible.

Emotionally blunted
The conservation E9 does not tolerate, in the long run, the intensity of emotions. Feeling too
much is dangerous; there is the fear of losing control, fear of something that he does not know
about himself, and that produces anxiety. He fears what he might discover and show if he
follows the intensity and goes deeper.

Showing yourself without fear of judgment leads to the assumption that the more you show, the
more you feel. And there is less need for the other, to the point of ending up not needing it, with
the implicit risk of being left alone. Too much pain could kill him or lead him to kill, too much
pleasure could make him feel and come off as lustful, too much joy could make him feel childish
and inadequate, and too much joy could make him feel shallow and, above all, selfish.

You have no confidence in your emotions and thoughts. You do not believe that what you feel,
think, or want is fair, and following your impulses without the approval of the world can be
dangerous. Basically, there is the confusion between being and not being, plus the fear of
rejection or indifference. On the one hand, he needs to believe in himself, but if the world does
not give him confirmation, he cannot exist. In order not to conflict or create problems, give up
and adapt.

Physically confident
Trusts his body a lot and its ability to always respond to the maximum; he is his guarantee of
survival and the machine with which to face difficulties. He must always feel healthy; if the body
is wrong, it feels betrayed.

Stubborn and Reactive

To support your reasoning you need a lot of anger and energy. He already starts with the shotgun
loaded because he doesn't really trust them; he always thinks they will make him look stupid,
childish, or out of place and therefore inappropriate. When he argues and does not feel heard, he
automatically raises his voice: if he shouts, the other is forced to hear him. In reality, it is a way
of giving energy to reasoning that cannot be sustained assertively; he thinks that the other does
not understand him because he does not want to listen to him. He doesn't feel recognized and that
makes him feel bad; he feels invisible, he feels that for the other he does not exist.

Consequently, he is stubborn, does not easily recognize that he has made a mistake, and can
cling to straws as long as he does not change his attitude or opinion. He stiffens because he feels
between a rock and a hard place and must defend himself. If he recognizes that the other is right,
it is like abdicating himself and he is afraid of the power that he gives to the other over him; but
he also knows that his renunciation of self-assertion is to betray himself in the name of “quiet
and harmonious living.” Sustaining yourself in the conflict seems crazy to you and you say to
yourself: “It's okay, whatever happens.” At first he feels anger but then anxiety, doubt and fear of
being alone, and weakening his drive also come. In the end he becomes stubborn so as not to
appear weak, to remain faithful to his ideas.
Kind and Insecure
He is friendly. You would like to present your ideas and have something to say, even if it is often
only perfunctory, and you easily remain neutral in a discussion between friends or colleagues. If
he starts talking, he can become verbose and passionate about what he says, expressing himself
with emphasis and emotion. While he speaks, however, he is very attentive to the expressions of
those who listen to him to know if they agree or not, and slips into the sentences words that ask
for approval. If he perceives nonconformity, he quickly loses confidence and becomes deflated.
To understand you need simple and clear words; the right word is “frankness,” without detours
or manipulations that make you lose your self-confidence.

If you realize that a thought of yours, or an emotion, or a gesture, is approved and appreciated,
that means that it is going well, and then it becomes a point of strength that you use repeatedly,
because it acquires the value of recognition. It can be recognized in him, through him it exists for
the world. This compensates for the feeling of insecurity and the threat of rejection that he
experiences when he shows himself, which is part of the crazy idea that it is not correct, from the
outset.

Resistant to change
He has a need for certainty and it takes an effort to accept change, which raises questions on
reality: he fears not knowing how to orient himself any other way; trying another path may mean
getting lost, and you lack confidence in your ability to find the resources to protect yourself. He
suffers change by resisting like a storm: just wait for it to pass; it remains like a reed that folds
but does not break and adapts. He is afraid of what is different, afraid of not knowing how to be
up to change, afraid that the situation will overwhelm him because he does not understand it. He
learns not to desire in order to survive, and every change, even those he considers positive, is
experienced as destabilizing.

Other conservation E9s, although they crave change, seek it through superfluous modifications,
or else wait for it to happen on its own. They easily give up their desire, not only to avoid
conflict but also to save themselves frustration. This character knows the polarity of opposites,
but does not accept that they can coexist instead of canceling each other out. It is an emotional
rigidity that is born from the sensation of insecurity, of danger, of not knowing what to believe,
and of the habit of giving more value to what the world says than to what you feel inside. White
is a certainty, and so is black, but if they get mixed up, he no longer knows how to recognize
them.

Voracious in inertia
There is an unconscious voracity for experiences and knowledge, but it lacks the internal drive
that overcomes inertia to start the search. He harbors the illusion that he must see it from outside,
like an illumination from above. He doesn't know how to search because he doesn't believe in his
intuition or in his desire, he is afraid of making mistakes and, therefore, getting lost. He remains
frustrated and subconsciously hungry. That is why he looks for the “extraordinary” that upsets
everything, it frightens him and excites him to imagine something extraordinary, being amazed
at what happens to him makes him come into contact with life; it is the opposite of ordinary and
activates desire.

Imaginative
Not knowing how to live in reality, he seeks escape routes. He is under the illusion that his
kingdom is not of this world and that he can live in another. In his childhood escape from reality
instead of facing it, he lives the experience better with his eyes closed, with sensations that lead
to another dimension instead of living in the present. He despises his own abilities: “I am not up
to this world,” with victimhood: “no one understands me.” He does not feel of this world, but
with nostalgia for another dimension where there is only harmony.

Reality is never completely acceptable to the conservation E9, which spends a lot of energy
coloring it without actually transforming it. You can endure a lot, standing firm and imagining, at
the same time, that you revolutionize the world. Resisting real change requires a lot of mental
work and abdominal control; hence, one day it may happen that, not having made small and
substantial changes, it explodes like a pressure cooker and acts without thinking, sweeping away
everything.

Gullible
If someone throws an accusation at you, your first reaction is to believe that the other is right and
that it is really your fault. Only later, on rethinking, may he realize that he could not be his sole
responsibility.

Conflict avoidant
He is slow to metabolize an experience; it is not enough for him to get married once to learn that
fire can be dangerous. To elaborate is to judge and that implies coming into conflict with oneself.
The conflict generates anxiety, doubt, confusion, destabilization, and even the possibility of
choosing oneself instead of the other, which brings one closer to the taboo of selfishness. That is
why he is not capable of relativizing and takes everything very seriously, both relationships and
commitments.

Avoids and postpones choice

In the face of abundance, he does not know how to choose, everything is on the same plane and
one thing is the same as another. Not knowing what he wants turns into compulsive greed and
tries everything. Choosing takes effort and you can postpone an important decision to infinity for
fear of not knowing what the right choice is. He is afraid of taking risks and if he thinks or feels
too much he is no longer able to act, which causes anxiety. He does not know how to make the
assessments that allow him to choose, he chooses on impulse, when he launches himself and
manages to move. That is why he is clueless, because he is always loaded with a lot of things.
Furthermore, choosing supposes the need to take a position, to place oneself, and this would
mean being aware of an “I” that desires.

Impulsive and Naïve

Money is important to the extent that it helps you get what you want. If he likes an object, he can
pay for it above its value without realizing it, and he can also find the low value of an object
excessive and not buy it even if it works for him. From excess to lack, he impulsively splurges or
gives up by reflecting too much. If he sells something made by himself, and he has felt pleasure
doing it, his price is only that corresponding to the material used, because he can not make him
pay for the pleasure that doing it has given him.

Low self-esteem
She is impatient, she would like everything and that's it, and that everything would turn out
perfect the first time. She doesn't know how to handle frustration and doesn't believe in her
ability to learn: “I'm worth nothing.” To this judgment that she makes, she reacts with rebellion:
“I don't need it”; she prefers to give up fighting.

Rebel
Automatically goes on the counter. If the situation is tense, he assumes the role of an observer
who does not want to get involved. If, on the contrary, it is harmonious, he is intolerant and
provocative. It is an attitude linked to internal rebellion; in fact, very often he remains outside of
real participation, he wastes his time interpreting situations instead of living them fully. He is
also confrontational with himself and is undisciplined. The mind programs and sets homework
but the guts and the heart do not collaborate; there is no emotional involvement. Thus, the
illusion is created that he is free, that he does what he wants and not what he should, as a
substitute for pleasure.

Shy
There is a lot of shyness, because he does not exist, he is in the world just to look. He is very
uncomfortable if he sees himself in the front row, he feels too exposed and has to force himself
not to be in the center of attention. In relationships, he is not the one who takes the first step,
because he always thinks that the other will not be interested in getting to know him, that he will
annoy them, with fear of rejection and dependence on the judgment of others.

Procrastinator
You are better at postponing than coping. Easily postpones everything you don't like or finds too
tiring because it leads to arguments or conflict. Or he postpones because the situation calls for
organization and movement and he doesn't know where to start, he gets lost and gives up.

Sacrificial
He sacrifices himself automatically, with a robotic altruism that perceives the discomfort of the
other and makes himself available to him. He renounces himself and offers this renunciation.
Basically, he has the passive and underlying claim to be seen and loved precisely because of this
ability to offer himself. He puts the other on Olympus, makes him God. For the conservation E9
it is taboo to feel like a God, and he projects this image of himself on the other, making him
absolute, unique, and resplendent with his own light. He agrees to be his shadow because,
through his projection, the other will return his splendor to him and he will be able to live on the
light reflected from him. It is a form of parasitism; it could even be said that he feeds the other
and then feeds himself.

Involved and Attached

Has difficulty withdrawing, either from relationships or experiences. You can stay attached even
if you perceive, in either case, that it's over; it is always better than wandering in space without
direction or purpose.

Autonomous
He does not like that another depends exclusively on him, it scares him because it would take
power away from his need to feel free and autonomous. You can give yourself entirely to the
other and at the same time feel indispensable supposes too much commitment and responsibility.

Without limits
It is difficult for him to understand that there is a limit, either for himself or for the world. He
doesn't feel any brake and doesn't even know when he wants to or should stop, as if he could
keep going (it is the principle of inertia, by which a body continues in a straight line unless an
external force intervenes). It is the consequence of feeling that it exists only if the other exists, by
not being in contact with oneself. Fear can become an ally because it tells you, with its
manifestation, that it is time to stop.

He makes it instantly in touch with him. He thinks of revenge as a consolation strategy, and he
can ruminate on it and never execute it and remain attached to rage. He finds it hard to accept
that for others it is not something temporary and starts manipulative strategies to try to find out if
the other is still angry with him. He needs to know that the conflict has not turned into a war for
the other, and he needs to return to harmony, to feel at peace with the world, to know that the
conflict has ended.

Unconventional
Is not deliberately transgressive of social rules and authority, and at the same time it is not a
problem for him to go against social conventions and moral rules. It is difficult for him to take
into account the roles, because he does not know how to move in formality. This makes him
appear aggressive and self-confident, when in reality it is a failure to recognize, first of all to
himself, the possibility of having a role and being able to protect himself through it.
Simple
He feels comfortable in the middle of nature, and feels love and deep respect for animals,
because in nature and with animals the relationship occurs in a simpler way.

We will end, then, with E9 conservation, for which Ichazo used the word appetite. It is obvious
that these people tend to have bigger bodies, so it is very likely that they have a bigger appetite
too. Sancho Panza is a literal example of E9 conservation and it is interesting that the belly was
chosen by Cervantes to baptize him, being something so central to this character. Let's explore
the idea that some person can be said; ―as, therefore I am‖.

Each of the characters is open to this Cartesian approximation: ―I think I am, therefore I am,‖ an
E6 would say. ―I suffer, therefore I am‖, an E4 would say. Actually, they are very descriptive
expressions about how each of the characters feels the emptiness of their being. Take the
example of sexual E4, whose central theme is competitive hatred and goes around cutting heads.
I could say: ―I hate, therefore I am.‖ This main feature of each subtype is the one that best
responds to this equation of solving the question of being through a substitution or a mirage of
being. Human beings have all kinds of substitutes for being: a veritable fury of lollipops.

We have all kinds of pacifiers that give us the impression that this or that is what we were
looking for. And we miss our way because we run after these illusions that promise us to be
where he is not. In the case of the nine conservation, there is an excessive resemblance to a little
animal. It is not only about ―I eat, therefore I am‖, but also about ―I sleep, therefore I am‖, ―I
have, therefore I am‖, ―I am standing here, therefore I am‖...

The facts of life, everything ordinary, they have the ability to obstruct your consciousness. For
him there is no metaphysical level. Somehow, the question of being has been erased from the life
of a nine conservation. You can't talk about being with Sancho Panza. There is only his belly.
The substitution of the mother's breast for the bottle has been so complete that there is no
memory of maternal love in the vocabulary.

So these conservationists are very loving people but deep down they don't have a sense of being
loved. His resignation is the most prominent. And there is in them a kind of joy, a kind of
tenderness that, however, is far from the full experience of love. Erich Fromm already says it: to
have or to be. It is probably the same thing for them. In the world of the great bankers, for
example, you see many friendly faces, with double chins, very practical people... This is Homo
Economicus.

As a good enneatype nine—but I didn't know it at the time—I accepted the experience, more to
satisfy my therapist than out of any real interest or curiosity. But how well I obeyed!
A girl abandoned to herself in pain, frustration and rage, in order to survive and not go crazy,
changes her true self for the illusion of being. The soul, defeated and betrayed, falls asleep,
forgetting itself. From that moment on, enneatype nine will experience the illusion of being able
to live without existing, without desires to pursue.

When she is on stand-by, she remains on hold without finding herself abandoned, rejected, or
anything else, because she does not have the appropriate emotions to interpret her not living.
That's why she is also alone for a long time, but when it turns on again she smiles again, cries,
loves and hates.

I also exercised remote control over myself: when I didn't like the reality I was living in, I
suffered from it, and in order not to risk wanting to change it, I put myself back on standby.
Laziness reassured itself and accepted boredom. The positive note for me, E9 conservation, is
that, in my almost complete cancellation, an infinitesimal part of me has not given in and has
continued to believe in the pleasure and spontaneity of the girl I was. From that small flame of
faith in me, everything could start over.

My belly has been the container for the expression of my spirituality; From the inner child I have
accessed a spirituality that has allowed me to see things from another plane. And from there I
have seen and understood what is my matter and my primordial chaos, and how I had come to
stay there or stop, using only the part of the reptilian brain.

For a conservation E9, the most difficult thing is to admit that the other is right. There is always
a ―but‖. Quickly, he flees from discomfort by distracting himself, covering himself with fog,
perhaps losing himself in a phrase or observation. He doesn't agree, he's uncomfortable, but
rather than get in touch with anger or admit his disagreement, he creates confusion and fog for
himself, trying to distract himself and others.

A nine lives on the surface, and diving deep is enormously tiring; but he will do it if he knows
that, when he emerges again, already at the edge of the air, someone will give him a hand to help
him return to earth.

―I'm alone, anyway, I have to do it alone, I can't ask for help, asking for time for myself is
would create problems‖.