Module UNDERSTANDING THE SELF

Introduction

Understanding the Self is a module prepared to provide you college students the
most direct way to understand yourselves. It covers the nature of Identity, the factors,
and forces that affect personal development, and the maintenance of personal identity.

This module assists students in accepting their total self to identify their most
and immediate and long term-goals as they recognize their vision in life. It will also
guide them in analyzing their study habits, attitudes, and skills to help them manage
their gift of time. This module will help students enhance their kills and increase their
commitment in demonstrating proper behavior at home, school, public places, and in
other various venues and situations. It will also be a vital took in the student’s survival
kit for college/university life. The modular exercises, activities and other requirements
are presented n an outcome-based format. These activities aim to develop confidence,
self-esteem, and empowerment to students so that they may find meaning in their life.

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The Philosophical View of the Self

A. Socrates
-was an ancient Greek philosopher, one of the greatest figures of Western Philosophy.
He lives in Athens in 5th century BCE. He was the first Greek philosopher to seriously
explore questions of ethics.

“Know Thyself”- Socrates famous line.

This means that man must stand and live according to his nature. (Fundamental
dispositions and characteristics of man including ways of thinking, feelings and acting).
What is it to be human?

Socrates is concerned with man. He considers man from the point of view of his inner
life. The famous line of Socrates is “Know Thyself”, it tells each man to bring his
inner self to light. Man has to examine his life to understand his inner self. Socrates
asserts that unexamined life is not worth living. Whatever experiences we go through
whether good or bad we should think of the reason why they happen then examine our
actions and try to understand the pattern of our behavior as to whether it needs
modification or changed.

Socrates also believes that the quality and persistence of the attention we pay to living
an examined life is at the heart of living well. It means that we will successfully live a
life worthy of love and attention if we always try to examine our lives whether it is
worth appreciated by other or whether it impacted other lives too.

He further asserts that self-discovery and self-knowledge must be done through our
own firsthand experience.

Our capacity to observe, question, reason and create may lead us to discovering errors
that would cause us to create new and better ideas. He also believes that knowledge
is the ultimate virtue, best used to help people improve their lives. He postulated that,
“the only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance”.

The core of Socrates ethics is the concept of virtue and knowledge. Virtue is the
deepest and the most basic preference of man. Knowing one’s own virtue is necessary
and can be learned. Since virtue is innate in the mind and self-knowledge is the
source of all wisdom, an individual may gain possession of oneself and be one’s own
master through knowledge.

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Plato - The Ideal Self, the Perfect Self

- One of the worlds’s best known and most widely read and studied
philosophers. He was the most famous student of Socrates and the teacher of Aristotle
who wrote in the middle of the fourth century B.C.E in ancient Greece. In his written
dialogues, he conveyed and expanded on the ideas and techniques of his teacher
Socrates. He supported most of Socrates’ ideas.

Plato agrees with Socrates that a person has a soul. According to him, the soul
is composed of three parts:
 Reason - is more concerned about what is true and what is good for the
person
 Spirit - seeks for honor and competitive values, and governs person’s
emotions
 Appetite - is drawn to food, drinks, and sex.
These three components of the soul are driven by different desires and can be
pulled in different direction if left uncontrolled.

According to Plato, the world has two characteristics:

 The visible aspect that comes form our sense experience
 The nonvisible aspect that comes in the form of ideas understandable by
the mind
What we perceive through our sense is not the real thing but only appearances
and imperfect reflections of the eternal form. From these sense experiences, we
form our opinions and beliefs. What is real is beyond perception and can only be
approached through the human mind. The most important component of reality
is accessible not to the senses but to the mind alone.

According to Plato man was omniscient or all-knowing before he came to be born

into this world. With his separation from truth and knowledge and his long exile on
earth, he forgot most of the knowledge he had. However, by constant remembering
through contemplation and doing good, he can regain his former perfection.

While man is exile on this planet earth, he has a guiding star, a model or a divine
exemplar which he must follow to reach and to attain his destiny. This means that man
in this life should imitate his former self; specifically, he should live a life of virtue in
which human perfection exists. The fruit of virtue is happiness which is attained by
constant imitation of the divine exemplar of virtue, embodied in man’s former perfect
self.

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Immanuel Kant - Respect for Self

He emphasizes that people have “intrinsic worth” because they are rational
agents capable of making their own decisions, directing themselves and their actions,
and freely orders means for the attainment of their aims. Moral good exist when the
rational creatures act from good will.

Morality requires us to treat each person, since he/she is valuable, always as an

end in him/herself and never merely as a means. This means that he/she should be
treated well, and with respect without manipulating him/her just to achieve our goals.
It means respect others as you would respect yourself. A person used not be used as a
tool, instrument, or device to accomplish another’s private ends. Thus, all men are
person’s gifted with the same basic rights and should treat each other as equal.

Rene Descartes - “I think, therefore I am”

Has been heralded as the first modern philosopher. He is famous for having
made an important connection between geometry and algebra, which allowed for the
solving of geometrical problems by way of algebraic equations.

Descartes states that the self is a thinking entity distinct from the body. His first
famous principle was “Cogito, ergo sum”, which means “think, therefore I am”. He
stated that the mind and the body are independent from each other and serve their
own functions, yet man must use his own mind and thinking abilities to investigate,
analyze, experiment, and develop himself. He reasons that if he is capable of doubting
he must exist. Even if he doubts the existence of everything, or is deceived by the
existence of the thing around him, then he must exist because he cannot doubt that he
doubts. This signifies the fact that some kind of an “I “exists that does the doubting.
He eventually defines self as a “thinking thing”. Cognito ergo sum, ““I think,
therefore I am”. Descartes also developed the Theory of Cartesian Dualism which
posits that one’s thoughts are a reflection of one’s beliefs, values, conditions,
experiences and development.

John Locke - Personal Identity

He highlights the concept of personal identity and survival of consciousness after

death. He holds that personal identity is founded on consciousness (memory), and not
on the substance of either the soul or the body.

Personal identity is the concept about oneself that evolves over the course of an
individual’s life. It may include aspects of life that man has no control over, such as
where he grew up or the color of his skin, as well as the choices he makes, like how he
spends his time and what he believes.

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David Hume - The Self is the Bundle Theory of Mind

A Scottish Philosopher, historian, economist, and essayist known for his

philosophical empiricism (knowledge is derived from sense-experience) and skepticism
(doubting). He conceived of philosophy as the inductive experimental science of human
nature.

Hume is skeptical about the existence of the self, specifically on whether there is
a simple, unified self that exist over time. For him, man has no “clear and intelligible”
idea of the self. He posits that no single impression of the self exists; rather, the self is
just the thing to which all perceptions of a man is ascribed. Moreover, even if there
were such an impression of the self, it would have to remain constant over time to
constitute identity. However, man’s impressions vary and always change. Even
attempts to have impressions of the self must fall for all these attempts are really just
occasions for one to notice perceptions. Put simply, a person can never observe oneself
without some other perceptions. Thus Hume asserts that what we call the “self” is
really just a “bundle of collection of different perception which succeeds each other with
an inconceivable rapidity”.

The Christian or Biblical View of Self

The Holy Bible

“God created man in His image, in the divine image. He created him,
male and female He created them. God blessed them, saying, “Be fertile and
multiply, fill the earth and subdue it. Have dominion over the fish of the sea,
the birds in the air, and all the living things that move on the earth”.
Genesis 1:24-28

According to the Holy Bible, man following his redemption by the Savior from eternal
bondage, now shares in the infinite merits of his Redeemer and has become not only
the inheritor of the new earth but also the heir of heavenly kingdom. Thus, it is
appropriate to think of the “self” as the multi-bejeweled crown of creation – the many
gems thereof representing and radiating the glorious faces of man’s self that include
the physical, intellectual, moral, religious, social, political, economic, emotional,
sentient, aesthetic, sensual and sexual aspects.

The Crown
Creation of Self

St. Augustine: Love and Justice as the Foundation of the Individual Self
St. Augustine believes that a virtuous life is dynamism of love. It is a constant
following of and turning towards love while a wicked life is a constant turning away
from love. Loving God means loving one’s fellowmen and loving one’s fellowmen.

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The Psychological View of the Self

Introduction:

Have you ever experienced doing something that you are not consciously aware
of, like biting your finger nails while in the middle of a serious discussion, shaking your
legs while conversing with another person, or saying things which are not supposed t
be mentioned (slip of the tongue)? Consider the following questions:

1. What are you thinking while biting your finger nails or shaking your legs?

2. How did you feel about it?

3. Were you aware you were doing it?

Sigmund Freud - The Psychoanalytic Theory

In addition, have you experience things even when you don’t feel like doing
them? Do you still continue to do them because they have to be done in order to
protect yourself from being judged or labeled negatively?
Freud’s asserts that the human psyche (personality) is structured into three parts
(tripartite). These structures - the id, ego and the superego – all develop at different
stages in a person’s life.

These three structures are systems and not physical parts of the brain. Although
each part comprises unique features and contributes to an individual’s behavior, they
interact to form a whole.

Parts of Personality:

1. Id (internal desires). Internal drive or instinctive drives, which consists of the

body’s primitive biological drives and urges which are concerned only with
achieving pleasures and self-satisfaction and to strove to constantly reduce
tension.

This means that it only concerns n immediate personal satisfaction regardless of

physical or social limitations (Burger, 2015). All of id’s energies are spent for one
purpose: to seek pleasure without regards for what is proper or just. (Feist et al.
2013). It lives completely in the unconscious.

2. Ego (reality). It is the “I” part of the individual that gives him/her the sense of
his/her own identity. It is the rational part of the personality. It is the only
region of the mind in contact with reality. It grows out of the id during infancy

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and becomes a person’s sole source of communication with the external world.
It governs the reality principle.

3. Superego (conscience). It is the part of the personality which is concerned

with morals, precepts, standards, and ideas. This is also the critical faculty of
the personality. It represents society’s, and in particular the parent’s values and
standards. The superego places more reaction on what we cannot do.

Psychosexual Development of Sigmund Freud:

Freud also argues that that the development of an individual can be divided into
distinct stages characterized by sexual drives which are focus certain erogenous (areas
of the body that has heightened sensitivity). As a person grows, certain areas become
sources of pleasure, frustration or both.

Stages of Psychosexual Development:

Stage Age Characteristics

Oral Stage Birth An infant’s primary interaction with the world is through the
to mouth. The mouth is vital for eating, and the infant derives
one pleasure from oral stimulation through gratifying activities such as
yr. tasting and sucking. If this need is not met, the child may develop
an oral fixation later in life. Ex. Thumb-sucking. Smoking,
fingernail biting, and overeating.
Anal Stage 1 to Freud believes that the primary focus of the libido is on controlling
3 bladder and bowel movements. Toilet training is a primary issue
years with children and parents. Too much pressure can result in an
excessive need for order of cleanliness later in life, while too little
pressure from parents can lead to messy or destructive behavior
later in life.
Phallic 3 to Freud suggested that the primary focus of the id’s energy is on the
6 yrs genitals. According to Freud, boys experience an Oedipal Complex
and girls an Electra Complex, or an attraction to the opposite sex
parent. To cope with this conflict, children adopt the values and
characteristics of the same-sex parent, thus forming superego.
Latent 6 to During this stage, the superego continues to develop while the id’s
Stage 11 energies are suppressed. Children develop social skills, values, and
yrs. relationships with peers and adults outside of the family.
Genital 11 to The onset of puberty causes the libido to become active once
Stage 18 again. During this stage, people develop a strong interest in the

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yrs opposite. If development has been successful to this point, the

individual will continue to develop into a well-balanced person.

Defense Mechanisms:

In psychoanalytic theory, defense mechanisms represent an unconscious

mediation by the ego of id impulses which are in conflict with the wishes and needs of
the ego and/or superego.

By altering the distorting one’s awareness of the original impulse, one makes it
tolerable.

Because of anxiety provoking demands created by the id, superego, and reality,
the ego had developed a number of defense mechanisms, to cope with anxiety.
Although we may knowingly use these mechanisms, in many cases these defenses work
unconsciously to distort reality. The most common defense mechanisms are the ff.

Rationalization - means finding reasonable explanation for unreasonable or

unacceptable behavior to make them sound logical and acceptable or putting something
into a different light or offering a different explanation for one’s perceptions or behavior
in the face of changing reality.
Ex. A student might say, “I cut out classes because other students are doing it.

Denial - is done when a person refuses to accept the reality or fact, act as if thought
or feelings did not exist.
Ex. A teenager may deny that he or she is having a problem interacting with people,
thus telling his or her parents, “I’m not interested in people”.

Repression - is the unconscious blocking of unacceptable thoughts, feelings, and

impulses. In this mechanism, the ego involuntarily excludes from consciousness any
painful thoughts, feelings, memories, or impulses.

Projection - means attributing one’s own undesired thoughts, feelings or impulses to

another person who does not have those thoughts, feelings or impulses. So, a lady
who is tempted to have an affair with another man begins to suspect her partner of
being unfaithful. Projection is often the result of a lack of insights and
acknowledgement of one’s own motivations and feelings.

Reaction Formation - refers to a denial and reversal of one’s feelings.

Ex. A student who is very angry with his teacher and would love to stop attending the
class may instead be overly kind to his teacher and express the desire to continue
attend his classes until the end of the semester. Or a person who is unconsciously
attracted to the same sex may develop an intense hatred of gays.

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Sublimation - is the channeling of unacceptable impulse, thoughts, and emotions into

more acceptable ones.
Ex. A child who wants to get the attention of his parents will have a drive to do well in
school.

Displacement - is the channeling of energy away from one person or object to an

alternative. People tend to use this mechanism because they cannot express their
feelings in a safe manner to the person they are directed to.
Ex. A student who has a hard day in school may come home and yell at the dog. The
student is redirecting his anger from his studies to his dog.

The Real Self and the Ideal Self (by Carl Rogers)

Carl Rogers, a humanistic psychologist, believed that we all own a real self and
an ideal self. The real self is what we, the self, feel most true to what and who we
really are. On the other hand, the ideal self is the self that we think we want to be,
that we strive to be and that we feel we are expected to be. The self is born out of
the influences outside of us and holds values absorbed from others. It is created out of
what we have learned from our life experiences. This is the self that accommodates
the expectations of others to gain more acceptance and love.

All of us want to adhere the ideal self we hold and see to it that we can be the
best of what we can be. However, it will become problematic when our ideal selves are
not consistent with who we are. If the inconsistency is not addressed, this would lead
to stress and anxiety because the real self would have difficulty attaining the real self.

Real Self and False Self (by Donald Winnicott)

There are times when we wear masks to survive in a difficult conversation and
interact appropriately in a wide variety of our interpersonal experiences. At some point
in our lives, we show the different side of ourselves. We may think, feel, and act
differently when we are with our family, friends, classmates, or acquaintances.
However, it is very important to be aware of these different social masks to help us
manage our lives because, if not, we are at risk of feeling disconnected from ourselves.

Dr. Donald Winnicott, an English psychoanalyst, proposes that the false self
develops when an infant’s emotional needs are either unmet or met unreliably. When
this happens, it’s not only the environment that they don’t trust as they grow up but
also themselves. This basic mistrust develops because infants depend not only their
primary needs to their care givers but also on reliable, accurate, and empathic
emotional responses. Moreover, infants rely on their primary caregivers to accurately
mirror (reflection) their emotional experiences. It is through this accurate mirroring

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that infants learn how to label their own emotions and trust the validity of their internal
experiences.

Factors in the Development of the Physical Self:

The development of the individual’s is caused by forces heredity and

environment.

Heredity (Nature) - is the transmission of the traits or characteristics from

parents to offspring. It provides the raw materials of which the individual is made up
of. Through the genes hereditary potentials like physical, mental, social, emotional, and
moral traits are passed down to generations.

Environment (nurture) - is the sum total of the forces or experiences that a

person undergo from conception to old age. It also includes family, friends, school,
nutrition, and other agencies one is in contact with.

The Beginning of Life:

Life begins at fertilization. Fertilization refers to the meeting of the female sex cell
and the male sex cell. These sex cells are developed in the reproductive organs called
gonads. The male sex cells is called spermatozoa (singular: spermatozoon) are
produced in the male gonads called testes. On the other hand, the female sex cells
are called ova are produced in the female gonads known as ovaries. The fertilized
egg cell known as zygote contains all the hereditary potentials from the parents.
This zygote goes to the uterus and continues to grow during the gestation (pregnancy)
period of about 280 days or 36 weeks or 9 calendar months.

Each parent contributes one sex chromosome to the offspring. A male parent may pass
either an X or Y chromosome while a female always gives the X chromosome. When an
X chromosome comes from the father and meets the X chromosome form the mother,
the resulting combination is XX which indicates a female offspring. However, when the
father produces a Y chromosome which pairs with X chromosome from the mother, the
resulting combination is XX, signifying a male offspring.

Both male and female chromosomes contain several thousands of genes. Genes are
small particles in a string-like formation. They are true carriers of hereditary
characteristics of the parents. Within the gene is a substance called deoxyribonucleic
acid (DNA) which is the code of heredity. It contains information and instructions
about the newly created organism, and programs the traits that should be inherited.
Maturation is the unfolding of the inherent traits.

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Stages in the life Span

An individual undergoes definite stages of development. In each phase, the

child experiences certain developmental characteristics to prepare him/her for the next
task.

Stages of Human Development

Developmental Stage Age
Prenatal Period Conception to birth
Infancy Birth to end of the second week
Babyhood End of the second week to end of the
second year
Early childhood or preschool age Two to six years
Late childhood or elementary age Six to ten or twelve years
Puberty or preadolescence Twelve to thirteen or fourteen years
Adolescence Thirteen to fourteen or eighteen years
Early adulthood Eighteen to forty years
Middle age Forty to sixty years
Old age or senescence Sixty years to death

Taking Care of My Physical Self

Since the self is inseparable from the body, you should take very good care of
your physical self. Whether you plan to lose, gain, or maintains the weight of your
body, the most important thing to do is to keep yourself fit. To achieve this goal, a
right plan has to be made.

Balanced Diet

Eating a balanced diet means consuming the right kind of food at the right time
and in the right proportion. One’s food intake should contain the necessary nutrients
essential for growth and survival. This practice prevents malnutrition and diseases. It
is also important to keep mealtime pleasant and enjoyable. Thus, an individual should
be encouraged and motivated to eat more nutritious food. It should also be
remembered that junk food must be avoided.

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Essential Food Nutrients

Nutrient Functions Sources Amount of
Serving per Meal
Carbohydrates For supplying heat Starchy food, bread, 1 to 11 ¼ cup of
and energy to the rice, tubers, cereals, rice
body and their products 1 to 2 pieces of corn
in cob
Protein For building and Legumes and by ½ to ¾ cup
repairing broken or products, meat, 2 to 3 pieces of
worn-out tissues fish, poultry and by- meat
products, milk, and 1 glass of milk
milk products
Fats For maintaining Margarine, nuts, oil, 1 tablespoon of
heat and energy for butter, cheese, and vegetable oil and its
the body by-products equivalent
Vitamins and For healthy skin and All kinds of fruits ¾ to 1 cup of
Minerals hair, as well as for and vegetables; vegetables
aiding the normal internal organs like 1 slice of big fruit
functioning of the liver, gizzard, 1 piece of small fruit
body spleen, etc

Water

An individual should drink at least 8 glasses of water every day. It allows the
body to function efficiently. It also washes away wastes to keep the skin clear and
healthy. With a high –protein diet, the body utilizes the water properly and avoids
water retention. Liquids such as coffee, tea, or milk should not be counted as water.
Although they contain lots of water, there is also a build-up of caffeine, acid, or fat.

Sleep

It gives your bones, muscles, and the mind to recover. An individual needs eight
or more hours of sleep a day. One very important requirement for a refreshing asleep
is a firm mattress. If one sleeps in a slumped, uncomfortable position in a mattress
that is too soft, body aches may develop. A soft and lumpy mattress should be
replaced with a firmer one. Another way to improve the bed is to lower part of the
mattress so as to elevate the feet. It is an ideal position because the blood flows back
towards the heart and away from the feet. Moreover, sleeping on one’s stomach can
help prevent varicose veins from developing as well as other circulatory problems.

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Intelligent Behaviors

Fourteen Intelligent Behaviors

Performance can be greatly influenced by one’s behavior. Behavior is defined
as the manner in which a person conducts himself/herself in various circumstances.
When a person is behaving intelligently, he/she is said to manifest 14 behaviors or
dispositions (Costa, 2000).

Fourteen Intelligent Behaviors Indicative of an efficient and effective

Problem Solver: (Costa)

1. Persistence - means not giving up when the answer to a problem is not

immediately known.
Ex. answering exercises given by teacher but student wasn’t able to find the
answer at once.
2. Overcoming Impulsiveness - involves planning, clarifying goals, exploring
alternative strategies, and considering consequences before one begin a task.
3. Listening to others - some cognitive psychologists think that the ability to
listen to another person and understand their point of view is one of the highest
forms of intelligent behavior.
4. Flexibility in Thinking - it is when one considers other points of view
rather than running with the first thought that comes to mind.
5. Metacognition - refers to the awareness of how one is thinking or the
knowledge of what is going on in one’s head.
6. Checking for Accuracy and Precision -it is the behavior od not letting speed
surpass the desire for craftsmanship.
7. Questioning and Problem-posing - It means asking questions and finding
out problems for oneself.
8. Applying Past Knowledge to New Situation - It refers to the act of
calling upon one’s store of knowledge and experience as a source of date,
theories, or process to solve each ne challenge.
9. Precision of Language and Thoughts - a person with this behavior uses
descriptive terms to distinguish objects and provides criteria for value judgments.
10. Using all the Senses - the sense of feelings, seeing, hearing, or even
tasting are utilized to solve problems more effectively
11. Creating - it means applying ingenuity, originality, and insights. Creativity
develops one’s capacity to generate original, unique, clever, or useful products,
solutions, and techniques.
12. Living With a Sense of Wonderment - involved in this behavior are
inquisitiveness, curiosity, and openness to beauty, intricacy, complexity, and
simplicity.

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13. Cooperation - it refers to taking advantage of the knowledge and

insights that can only come as a result of social relationships.
14. Sense of Humor - if refers to being able to look at situations, opportunities,
problems, and relationships with nonchalance (calmness) and fun.

Possessing of these many intelligent behaviors is an advantage in the corporate world.

Business firms look not only for knowledge and experience, but also for efficiency and
effectiveness. Many firms and companies are already struggling to find enough well-
trained and inventive professionals. Which of the 14 qualities characterize your
behavior? Which do you need to start working on?

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Emotional Self
Achieving My Emotional Competencies

Fundamentals of Emotion:

Wheel of Emotions

Plutchick’s of emotion demonstrates how emotions are related to on another. Emotions

adjacent to one another in the wheel are closely related and can be combined. The
combinations can be found on the outer part of the wheel: for instance, love is the
combination of joy and trust. Meanwhile, emotions across each other are conceptual
opposite. Example: sadness is the opposite of joy. And anticipation is the opposite of
surprise. The eight fundamental emotions are also come in a variety of intensities.
Those nearest to the center signify the most intense forms of while those farther from
the center are the weaker forms.

Emotion Management Strategies:

In any social interaction, feelings may arise. These emotions may be positive or
negative and may affect relationships as well. Thus people should always keep their
emotions in check to avoid misunderstanding and miscommunication.

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Strategies for managing emotions:

1. Smile to make yourself feel good. Face a mirror –and smile. After some
time, your mood will be better and you might even laugh naturally. Do it for at
least 30 seconds.

2. Smile to make others good. Smiling opens up your connection with others.
It also leads to experiencing empathy.

3. Get up and move. Exercise activates happy hormones that include endorphin,
dopamine, and serotonin, among others. Movement is also important for the
lymphatic system to get the toxins out of your body. Get up from your desk and
jump and bounce regularly.

4. Check in with your body. Scan your body by feelings the tensions building
up. Learn to relate these tensions with the emotion you feel to understand how
your feelings affect your physiology.

5. Physically remove the tension. If you feel tense in your arms, shake them.
Likewise, if there is tension in your chest, stretch and breathe deeply.

6. Breath. Perform diaphragmatic or deep breathing by contracting your

diaphragm. Let your lower lungs fill with oxygen to pass around your body and
brain. You will feel a tingly sensation and your belly will expand. Do this
exercise for at least 60 seconds. The body cannot sustain anger when you are
breathing deeply.

7. Talk to someone. It is healthier to vent your anger and frustrations to

a friend rather than to suppress them. Express your feelings so you
can start to resolve the situation.

8. Dis-engage and re-engage emotions. Learn to park your emotions to deal

with at a later time, but do not avoid them. You must acknowledge your
feelings then utilize your emotional intelligence to improve them.

9. Label your emotions. After acknowledging your emotions, label them. This
activity reduces the intensity of your emotions. The part of the brain that feels
the emotion is the same part that names it.

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10. Label emotions for others. You can often defuse a tense situation by
acknowledging the feelings of others. When you ask, “I sense that you are
angry. Can you tell me how you feel?”. The other person will be encourage to
consider and label his/her emotion as well. He/she may respond with “Yes, I feel
angry.” or “No, I am not angry, I am annoyed”.

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Social Self
Relating Harmoniously and Properly With Everyone

Social Psychology

Many things come to mind when you hear the word “social”. Generally, this term
has something to do with relating well or interacting with others. The study of social
relationships or interaction is called “social relationships”. Social Psychology
defines as the branch of psychology that studies individuals as they interact with others.
This is a broad field whose goal is to understand and explain how thoughts, feelings,
perceptions, and behaviors are influenced by the presence of, or interactions with,
others (Plotnik, Kouyoumdjian). People interact and behave in certain ways when they
are at home with their family, when they are in school with their classmates and
teachers, or when they are at work with their superiors or fellow workers.

Additionally, for Gerrig and Zimbardo (2002), social psychology is the study of the effect
of social factors on individual behavior, attitude, perceptions, and motives. It is likewise
the study of behaviors as influenced by interactions and transactions between persons.
Social psychology is the study of a group and intergroup phenomena.

The key words in the various aforementioned definitions are interactions and
relationships. Interaction refers to the mutual and reciprocal exchange of
communication or action between two or more persons or groups. On the other hand,
relationship refers to a particular way in which two or more individuals, groups, or
even countries talk to, behave toward, or deal with each other. There is an established
connection, kinship, or attachment between persons or groups attribute to several
factors – interests, philosophy of life, goals, or ways of thinking – that bind them
together. These two terms imply two-way exchanges.

There is fine line between interaction and relationship. Interaction is always a

component of a relationship. On the other hand, a relationship includes not only the
kind of interaction between the members of the group, but also the intellectual,
psychological, or even emotional investments made by the parties to develop and
maintain the relationships made by the parties to develop and maintain the
relationships. More often, the participants in a relationship agree to do something
similar to each other or even allow the same rights, privilege, or benefits arising from
any action that they both undertake. Interaction and relationship can be presented
along a continuum- from a simple and brief exchange between individuals or group to a
continuing communication and investments to sustain the connection.

After going through the discussion on social psychology, you have acquired some
useful insights that may serve as guides in social interaction. Vital to establishing social

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relationships at a personal or professional level are time, effort, and commitment. In

your daily life, you always experience interactions with people of different
characteristics, status, positions, gender, race, creed, culture, religious faith, and
language, among others. While these interactions may not necessarily evolve into a
deeper relationship, good interactions serve as a foundation for good connection. Once
a relationship with other people or groups is established, it is important to maintain and
nurture that association.

Person’s Perception

Person’s perception refers to forming impressions and making judgments

about another person’s likability after seeing or meeting him/her. The assessment
involves as well what kind of person one is, including his/her intentions, traits, and
behaviors (Plotnick & Kouyoumdjian, 2014). First impressions, which are formed within
a very short time with little conscious thought and biased by past experiences, are part
of person perception (Macrae and Quadflieg, 2010).

Several other factors influence one’s judgment or perception of another person.

One important aspect is physical appearance. A person who rarely smiles may be
thought of as arrogant or unfriendly. Sometimes, when an individual forms an opinion
on a person based on perception, he/she tries to justify or explain the said judgment.
For instance, rather than simply looking at the other person, the observer tries to
explain or looks for reason why the other person dresses or behaves in a certain way.

People usually use external appearance as immediate basis for assessing,

judging, or evaluating others. However, it I wrong to judge the character of a person
on the basis of first impressions because biases and errors may occur. It is advisable to
always validate one’s perception through further observations, gathering, or feedback
and reports, and interaction, among others, before making judgments. To avoid
misimpression, it is prudent to to behave, talk, or dress appropriately and in accordance
with societal, cultural, or institutional rules, policies, or guidelines.

Social Norms

Norms are patterns or traits characterized as typical or usual for a group. Other
terms associated with norms are “average” and “normal”. For example, an
individual’s mathematics score may be considered above the norm if it is more than the
average score or below the norm if it is less than average.

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Norms change over time. Many years ago, mothers stay at home to care for
their children, women wear only dresses and skirts in attending church services, or
couple raises big families. Today, these are no longer the norms due to changes in
many factors such as the financial, moral, social, psychological aspects of society.

Social norms refer to spoken and unspoken rules for behaving in particular
situations. One example is covering one’s mouth when sneezing or coughing. Most
people conform to the social norms of the culture in which they exist.

Norms in social behavior serve to guide or regulate the manner in which people
conduct themselves. Behaviors have to be controlled or regulated because of social
consequences. It is one’s responsibility to make sure that his/her behavior does not
hurt, offend, or disturb other people.

Observing norms in social behavior are expected of members of a group and the
larger society in general. Doing so ensures and maintains good relationships within the
group.

Every day, people engage in social situations which require interaction with
others from different walks of life and for many reasons. In these instances, people are
expected to behave based on defined and established o. It is advisable for a person to
always practice appropriate behaviors especially in social situations so as not to disturb
or offend others. He/she should make sure that interactions with others enhance or
improve relationships. Every effort should be exerted to maintain and enjoy
harmonious and good relationships.

Together as a Group

On many occasions, people work in groups. Students organize into study groups
to solve problems together when reviewing for an exam. Teachers meet with each
other to discuss methods to improve teaching and learning strategies. Farmers work
together during planting and harvesting of palay. Employees in an office work as a
team. Given these situations, it may be said that people work together for a purpose.
In many cases, the task becomes easier to accomplish because more people contribute
to solve the problems as compared to only one person doing the task.

In social situations where people work and do things together for a purpose, two
things may happen. First, the performance of each individual member of the group is
improved. This is also referred to as social facilitation (Levine, Resnick, & Higgins,
1993). Take for example two groups with five members each in a javelin throw
competition. The rule is to add the individual differences traveled by the javelin for
each group. As such, each group will garner a “total distance traveled” score. The

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group with the higher “total distance traveled” score wins. In this situation, each
member will exert his/her best effort to throw the javelin to the farthest point possible.

Second, working or being with the group may also reduce individual effort, a
phenomenon known as “social loafing”. For instance, if a group of students is asked
to solve a problem, some members of the group may no longer try their best to
contribute to the solution because they feel that there are others who can do it better.
Likewise, individual members may not contribute as much in doing the task because
they think it should be left to the more able members of the group.

Another example of social loafing may happen in a tug-of-war game.

Participants in the group will most likely exert less individual effort in pulling the rope
compared to a situation where one participant pulls the rope singlehandedly. The
diminished individual effort in a group activity can be attributed to many reasons. For
example, if the size of the group is very large, individual members may think slackening
will not be noticed or felt at all.

One has to bear in mind that in a group work, it is important that each member
exerts his/her effort to facilitate the attainments of the objectives of the group as a
whole. This is regardless of the members of participants in the group (few or many) or
the variation I their abilities (bright or slow members).

Conformity refers to yielding to group pressure to act as everyone does, even when
no direct request has been made (Lahey, 2009). It is the tendency to behave like
others in the group do.

Conformity is brought about by two motivations to gain reward (approval) or

avoid punishment (disapproval): and to gain information.

Some factors make conformity more likely to exist in a group (Lahey, 2009).

1. Size of the groups. The more people there are n the group, the more likely a
member tends to conform.

2. Unanimous Groups. Conformity is higher when an individual faces a group in

which all members feel the same way about a topic, a problem, or an issue.

3. Culture. Conformity occurs in all cultures. However, some cultures emphasize

the welfare of the
4. individual; thus people are less conforming. Others focus on collective welfare
so people tend to be more conforming. A high degree of conformity leads to
faster accomplishment of task or work.

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5. Gender. In the past, females were more likely to conform than males, but
research has shown that it is no longer the case (Eagly, 1978, Eagly and
Johnsons, 1990).

In social groups, the likelihood of conformity among members is very high.

However, individual members are not expected to always yield to the pressure to
conform. An individual member can decide for himself/herself whether or not to
conform and to what extent. The decision to yield to group pressure should be base
on answers to any of the following questions:

1. Will conforming do you good? What advantage or rewards wily o get from it?
2. Will conforming put a stake or endanger your integrity and that of your family?
3. Will it cost so much on your part if you conform?
4. Will you be penalized or punished if you do not conform?
5. Will things change if you yield/do not yield to social pressure?

As member of social group, one has to subscribe to basic and established rules,
policies, or guidelines for him/her to truly belong. If all members of the group live by
these institutionalized requirements, then order, discipline, system, peace, and harmony
will be sustained.

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Concept of Self Understanding and Enhancing one’s Self-image

Concepts Related to the Self

Carl Rogers
- Was the proponent of the “Self Theory”. This theory is regarded as humanistic
and is a move towards recognizing human potential for psychological growth.

The self is made up of many self-perceptions, abilities, and personality characteristics

that are organized and consistent with one another. Rogers (1953) contends that self-
concept plays an important role in personality because it influences human behaviors,
feelings, and thoughts.

Self-concept refers to how people see or describe themselves (Plotnick &

Kouyaoumdjan, 2014). It is the subjective subjection perception of who people are and
what they are like, or “the person I think I m or the person I wish to be” (Rogers,
1953). People with a positive self-concept tend to act, feel, and think constructively
and optimistically. Overall, they think of themselves in a good light. On the other
hand, people who have negative self-concept will behave, think, and act with
pessimism. They do not believe in their ability to do things or carry out certain tasks.

A positive or negative self-concept reflects a dominant or prevailing trend of

positivism or negativism in the self. Hence, if a person is labeled as having positive
self-concept, it means that his/her prevailing behavior and general outlook of
himself/herself are on the positive side. It does not mean, however, that the person
does not have any low or negative thoughts or ideas about oneself. It is just the
prevailing positive outlook that characterizes a person as having a positive self-image
and self-concept. In like manner, a person who has a negative self-concept may also
have positive or high point in his/her self-concept.

There are two kinds of self:

1. Real self - the image or picture what the self-based on a person’s actual
experiences and represents how he/she really actually see himself/herself. It is
what one thinks he/she is in terms of personal characteristics and abilities.

2. Ideal self - is the self-based on one’s hopes and wishes. It reflects how one
likes to see himself/herself to be.

The person who knows you best – your abilities, talents, personality, and characteristics
is you.

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You know your positive or high points as well as your negative or low points. Make
sure to maintain sustain our strengths. Likewise, strive to improve and change your
weaknesses or negative points into something positive.

See to it that what you wish to or desire to be with further developing your own
personality. Your abilities and positive aspects of your own personality should be
put to good use in helping improve the lives of other and the community at large.
Be sure that your dreams and desire to enhance your personality and abilities are
rooted in your purpose to help other people and will, in the long run, contribute to
developing good relationships.

Self-esteem

Personality and social development refer to how a person’s sense of self or

self-identity, relationship[s with others, and skills necessary for social interactions
evolve. Personal or self-identity explains how people describe themselves in terms
of values, goals, traits, and perceptions unique to them. It is closely related to self-
esteem on how much people value themselves and their worth as persons.

Self-esteem is the level of importance to oneself and one’s abilities. One may put
a high value or low value of his/her worth as a person. In many ways, self-esteem
relates to a person’s attractiveness and social competence. It is likewise associated
with important positive or negative outcomes. For example a high self-esteem is
correlated to healthy social relationships, being emotionally and socially adjusted,
cheerfulness, and overall happiness. On the other hand, a low self-esteem is
associated with negative outcome like, depression, anxiety, antisocial behavior, and
poor personal adjustment (Murray, 2005; Trzesniewski et al., 2006).

Self-esteem is distinct from self-concept as the latter refers it to the knowledge

of oneself or image or a person’s views, perceptions, or descriptions of himself/herself
in terms of certain characteristics.

One should strive to develop a high self-esteem because it determines his/her

kind of persona and social relationships. Holding god feelings about oneself results in
flexibility and adaptability to situations and people. On the other hand, a low self-
esteem may lead to poor social relationships.

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Self-actualization
Humans possess an inner drive to grow, improve, and use their potential to the
fullest (Plotnick, 2014). The final stage in completed growth is known as self-
actualization or self-fulfillment, a major tenet in humanistic psychology. According
to Abraham Maslow (1943), s self-actualizing person has reached the higher level or
peak of his/her personal development and has dully realized his/her potential as a
human being. The self-fulfilled person is generally happy, generous with his/her time
and effort to help others, and strive for the common good for his/her family,
community, country, and even humanity.

Hierarchy Needs of Maslow

In 1943, Abraham Maslow formulated the hierarchy of needs. It explains that

individuals’ actions are directed towards goal or attainment. The hierarchy is composed
of five stages of human needs and usually illustrate in a pyramid. The levels are
sequentially satisfied according to the most basic needs found at the bottom of the
pyramid, progressing onto high level of needs.

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs contends that people have to satisfy first their basic needs
(biological and physiological) before moving towards satisfying their social and personal
needs. The rate of achieving higher level needs may vary among individuals. However,

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it is possible for one to proceed to the next higher-level need even if he/she is still in
the process of fully satisfying a lower level need.

The five levels of needs of Maslow”

1. Physiological need - needs for survival which comprised of food, water,

shelter, clothing, and sleep. People would first be concerned with satisfying
these needs over the others. After satisfying these needs, they can advance to
the second level.

2. Safety and Security - This stage involves health and well-being, property,
social stability, and protection from harm, among others. It is necessary for
everyone, but more especially for those who live in dangerous areas.

3. Love and belongingness needs - The third stage. Adults and adolescents
who are starting to look for serious relationships are particularly concerned with
satisfying the needs at this level. It also includes the need for friendship,
intimacy, and a sense of establishing their careers.

4. Esteem needs - it contains items such as achievement, competency, approval,

recognition, and respect from others.

5. Self-actualization needs - Including this level are morality, realization of the

purpose in life, meaning, inner potential, and the like. This level aims for the full
development of one’s unique potentials only. Only a few individuals reach this
level because of the process of achieving self-actualization is difficult and
challenging.

Maslow also classified these needs into general categories: deficiency needs and
growth needs. Deficiency needs refer to the physiological (food, sleep) and
psychological (safety, love, esteem) On the other hand; growth needs are those at the
higher levels (desire for truth, beauty, and justice).

Characteristics of Self-actualized person:

a. They have reached a high level of moral development and are more concerned
with the welfare of loved ones. , friends, and humanity in general than
themselves. They are usually committed to some cause or task rather than
working for fame or money. They focus as well on accomplishing their goals.

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b. They are open, honest, and have the courage to act on their convictions, even if
it makes them unpopular. Not particularly interested in fads, fashion, or social
customs, these people enjoy friends but are not dependent on their company or
approval. They enjoy privacy, independence, and autonomy, and their feelings
for close friends are intensely positive and caring. They prefer deep, loving
relationship with only a few persons.

c. They have an accurate, concrete, and realistic rather than a romanticized – view
of people and life, and yet, they are positive about life.

d. Life is always challenging and fresh to self-actualizing individuals. They are

natural and spontaneous their actions and feelings. They likewise experience
moments of great joy and satisfaction.

Using the term “self-actualizing” rather than “self-actualized, means that attaining self-
actualization is a continuous and lifelong process of improvement. While only a few
individuals reach this level, everyone has a self-actualizing tendency. It is important
that at any level or stage in the hierarchy of needs, individuals strive to move towards
self-actualization.

As a student your age, you are expected to be at a particular level in Maslow’s

Hierarchy of needs. Most probably, you are still working to satisfy your physiological
and psychological needs, and to some extent, your need for love and belongingness is
emerging. Be sure to satisfy these needs only thorough socially acceptable ways.

One key action to fully satisfy your needs at each stage and to achieve self-
actualization is to study hard. In the process, you acquire a big stock of knowledge, as
well as develop the necessary life skills which help you achieve your goals.

While you have not yet reached the level of self-actualization, at this point in your
life, as it may take a lifetime to do so, you can already create a plan or target top attain
self-actualization. As a result, you will be able to focus your work and efforts towards
attaining self-actualization.

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Responsible Self My Commitment to Lifelong Growth

Gardner’s Theory of Intelligences

It was mentioned that general mental or cognitive abilities contribute to the kind
of person one is and one can be. Charles Spearman (1904) believed that intelligence
consists of a general mental ability or intelligence quotient (IQ, also called g factor)
and domain-specific abilities. IQ is a standardized measure that represents a
person’s reasoning skills.

It has been accepted in the psychological community that intelligence is not

necessary a single and generalized characteristic, but is comprised of different specific
traits. Thus, researchers have attempted to identify and measure further the different
components off intelligence. One of the most famous works in this field is Howard
Gardner’s theory of eight intelligences. Gardner’s theory asserts that each person
possesses a certain specific intelligence where he/she is most probably good or skilled
at. Following are the specific intelligences espoused by Gardner (1983):

1. Verbal-linguistic intelligence. It is characterized by the ability to think in

words and use language to express meaning. Usually, people with this kid of
intelligence have occupations as authors, journalists, speakers, or poets.

2. Logical-mathematical intelligence. It refers to the ability to carry out

mathematical operations; ability to handle long chains of reasoning,; and the
sensitivity and capacity to discern logical or numerical patterns. Most people
with this skill become scientists, engineers, accountants, or mathematicians.

3. Spatial-visual intelligence. It implies the ability to think in image, pictures, or

three-dimensional figures, as well as the capacity to perceive the visual-spatial
world accurately and perform transformations on one’s initial perceptions.
People with this skill often work as architects, artists, sailors,/navigators, or
sculptors.

4. Bodily-kinesthetic intelligence. It is the ability to be physically adept at

manipulating objects, controlling one’s bodily movements, and handling objects
skillfully. Most people with this type of intelligence includes surgeons, crafts
people, artisans (making things by hand), dancers, or athletes.

5. Musical-rhythmic intelligence. It refers to the sensitivity to pitch, melody,

rhythm, and tone, the ability to produce and appreciate rhythm, pitch, and
timbre; and the appreciation of the forms of musical expressiveness. People

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with musical intelligence usually end up as composers, musicians, or sensitive

listeners.

6. Interpersonal intelligence. It refers to the ability to understand and interact

effectively with others, as well as the capacity to discern and respond
appropriately to the moods, temperaments, motivations, and desires of others.
People with this type of intelligence often work as teachers or mental health
professionals.

7. Intrapersonal intelligence. It is characterized by the ability to understand

oneself; the knowledge of one’s own strengths, weaknesses, desires, and
intelligences; as well as understanding of one’s own feelings and the ability to
discriminate among them and draw upon them to guide behavior. People with
this intelligence eventually become theologians, psychologists, or persons with
detailed and accurate self-concepts.

8. Naturalistic intelligence. It is described as the ability to observe patterns in

nature and understand natural and human-made systems; sensitivity to the
differences among diverse species; the ability to interact subtly with living
creatures. Most often, people with naturalist intelligence work as a farmers,
botanists, ecologists, landscapers, or environmentalists.

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