Bonus: Meetings Strategies

thepowermoves.com/courses/power-university/lessons/how-to-succeed-in-your-career/topic/bonus-meetings-
strategies

Some meetings can be a time waste.

But meetings are also opportunities to see, be seen, engage in politics, promote… And
curry favor with those in power.
So you should be strategic about your attendance and your behavior.

This lesson will provide you some ground rules of meeting power dynamics.

If everyone’s being a sycophant, you might need a different strategy to stand out

#1. Get Buy-In Before the Meeting

This is a common mistake for the more junior employees and the less politically-savvy
ones.

They see a meeting set on their calendar to discuss a certain topic and they think: “great,
that’s when I will introduce my great idea”.

Big freaking mistake.

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I have my own personal experience with this mistake.
When I was in a graduate talent programme we were given the chance to put our
discussion items on the table of our senior leadership.
We all had pretty ambitious changes to propose, and mine was the most ambitious:
change the home office policy from 2 days a week with manager’s approval, to no
manager’s approval needed, no limits on the number of days.
So we strolled into the room, spotless suits and matching ties, powerpoints ready, and we
started our show.

How did that go?

Saying that it went down badly would be an understatement. At a certain point, we were
even ridiculed. I did manage to change part of that dynamic with some pacing and leading
-I wish there was a video of it-, but ultimately it was still a huge failure.

Why?
Because persuasion is power.

If you try to persuade others of your idea on the spot, it’s like saying you have power over
them. And the higher in power -and the higher up in the organization- the attendees are,
the more they will naturally resist.
Of course, they will not think that they are going to resist your idea so that they can retain
power, but they will still act according to it.

This is when you will meet the most natural resistance:

1. You are junior compared to the attendees

2. You are on the same level, but you’re newer in the organization
3. You have only average -or below average- personal reputation
4. You are presenting a big change
5. You are asking for a costly change
6. You are asking for changes on the status quo that the attendees previously approved

The solution?
You must do your persuasive work before the meeting.

Speak to the key stakeholder before the meeting, and get their opinions. Make their input
feel appreciated, modify your pitch based on some of their recommendations, and then go
back to them until they are at least open to hearing you.
Get the buy-in of as many key stakeholders as possible.
Ideally, you get approval before the meeting, and then the meeting’s presentation
becomes a formality.

You might not always be able to get buy-in or contact the attendees before the
presentation. But unless you have more power than everyone else in the room, at least
prepare your presentation keeping in mind the power dynamics: avoid making it sound
like you are criticizing, and always avoid it making it a “you persuading them”.
Welcome their criticism, say they are right, don’t use the word “but”, empower them to

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decide. If things are getting bad, you can say “look, I’m not saying this is a silver bullet.
I’m saying this might be a solution. But you guys know the situation even better than I do.
All I know is that it worked in this and that company, and all I’m asking you is to consider
this”.

On, and P.S.: as a rule of thumb, men resist being influenced in public situations
far more than women do.
So this is especially important if you are presenting to men, and if you are a woman.

#2. Ask Your Boss What He Expects On The Meeting

On average, you can ask pointed questions and challenge your peers, but you are not
allowed nearly the same latitude with those above your paygrade.

However, how much you can talk, ask, and challenge, also depends on the company
culture.
If you don’t know the company culture, or if you are not sure, always ask your boss. He
will also take it a sign you respect his authority, and it will help you establish a mentor-
mentee relationship.

#3. In Inter-Department Meetings, Side With Your Team

In intra-team meetings, you can argue with your colleagues.

But in inter-team meetings arguing with your colleagues can be perceived as “friendly
fire”, and like you are not being a team player.
When you criticize your colleagues in intra-team meetings, it can be perceived like you’re
not sufficiently feeling a “team belonging”.
Furthermore, if the boss is present, he might take it as a sign that you’re not a loyal player.

Why?
Because intra-team’s dynamics in the male culture have a tinge of “us/them”.

Yes, it’s childish having to “side” with your team, but that’s how the game is often played
in most organizations.
And if you don’t show you’re part of the “us”, you lose status in your team -especially with
men, and especially with male bosses-.

Don’t go out of your way to attack the other team, of course, but remind yourself which
team you’re on. Starting with the seating position. Sit with your team. Ideally, centrally,
not on the edges. Most of all, avoid sitting with the “them” team.

#3.2. Strategize With Your Boss In Mind

Some bosses have veiled hostilities with other teams.

If he drops comments of poor job done by “that team”, or often refers to them as “those
guys” in a light demeaning tone, then you know that he expects you to show team loyalty.

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With such a boss, in case you meet with other teams, it’s best not to show yourself too
open and too enthusiastic about their ideas. Your boss might perceive it as you be too
chummy with “those guys”.

Again, this is childish, of course.

But that’s still how many -possibly most- people naturally and subconsciously behave.

If you have a truly open-minded boss, great! You’re lucky, and your team is lucky. If not,
heed these suggestions.

#4. If You’re Being Targeted: Take Out the Leader

In that meeting with the senior leadership I mentioned above, the big boss made a joke
that my proposal would make a far-west of the organization, and that next we could allow
beers at work-.

Of course, him being the big boss, the whole room laughed.

I laughed too -this was also important, to show I was on their side and not taking it
personally-.
Then, as the laugh started dying down, I said something like this:

Me: Look, I can see why you’re worried about this (pacing, and showing respect for his
point of view).
It is worrying to give away so much power (aligning with him. Before re-aligning, it’s
always great to aligne first).
And I agree with you, some people will abuse of that power (validating his fears). And that’s
great (leading now with a total 360 turn. Now everyone’s attention is sky-high: what is he
going to say?). That’s exactly why this proposal can be a good idea. When everyone’s free
to abuse the system or to use to do bette rwork, we can quickly tell who are the good guys
from the bad ones.
This proposal is not a blank cheque for everyone to do whatever they want. This is a reward
for the best performers, so that we can keep and attract the top performers we want.
(the coordinator of the programmed referred to this instance when in her Linkedin
recommendation she said “negotiate with a very difficult opponent“)

Now nobody was laughing anymore.

And everyone was thinking about it. It was finally sinking in that, albeit drastic, the idea
might not be so stupid after all.

Why did it work?

Because I addressed the leader, the highest-ranking authority, and he was pondering it.

Had I said the exact same thing to someone else, it would have still been good, but most
people would have turned to the leader to see if he bought it.
And if the leader had kept attacking, the whole spiel would have fallen on deaf ears.

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Mind you, the board still did not move forward with the decision.
But they at least consider it.
And they all remembered my name.

If you find yourself under assault, you want to do something similar.

Ignore the attacks and barbs from the lower-level individuals in the room:
they are just vying for status. Instead, focus on highest rank in the room.
When you can win him over, you won everyone over.

#5. Grill External Vendors

Why do so many underlings get so aggressive at meetings?

In part, it’s because some men enjoy ganging up on others from a position of power.
And in part, it’ because being aggressive questions can actually be a good strategy to
showcase your skills -and toughness-.

It can be a strategic decision then to take a similar approach when there is a meeting with
external vendors, say, a consultant, or a seller of third-party software.
In those cases, you don’t want to grill them just for the sake of grilling them -that’s low-
quality power move-.
But you want to ask questions to showcase your ownership mindset, which is very leader-
like.

If the tool or person is going to impact your job, than you want to ask questions to make
sure you can keep doing a great job. And if you are spending company’s money, take
ownership of it as if it were your money, and ask questions to make sure it’s going to be a
good investment.

This is also an opportunity to showcase your critical thinking skills.

At the very least, you can ask basic questions such as “how do you know that”, which
shows that you care about the sources of information.

The same is true for interviews by the way.

You always want to ask at least a few questions to the job candidate.

#6. Sit Right to The Boss

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You’ve heard this one because it’s quite popular.
And for good reasons: it’s true.

The power of the boss permeates around him, and it will rub off of you.
Furthermore, sitting near communicates that you probably have a good relationship with
the boss -and that you’re not uncomfortable with power, which is good, since many men
are-.

Most of all, you want to avoid team meetings where your boss and your teammates are
sitting on the same side, and you are sitting across from them.
It sends the message you are not close to your team.

#7. Speak Early

This is the rule of thumb when it comes to order of speaking:

Those who speak early and often are seen as more credible, greater risk takers, and
possessing more leadership potential than those who speak later.

Those who speak last are seen as “also-run”, the ones that didn’t have enough value or
courage to speak first.

What if you didn’t have anything to say, or you really didn’t have the courage to go first?
Well, here is a cool power move for you, then: when you start speaking, summarize what
everyone else said. Give credit, mention a few people and their ideas. And then add yours.
Summarizing the conversation is very leader-like.

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Exception: The Decision Makers
The exception to this rule are the bosses, who can let everyone run, and then speak last
once they’re ready for the decision-making.

#8. Sharing Ideas: Mix Collaboration With Self-Promotion

Imagine you’re in a team meeting.
There is a lot of discussions back and forth, but so far no decision has been taken and
there seems to be no one leading.

You feel that you have a good idea on how to proceed.

Here are three options:

Too weak—“I’m not sure how everyone else will feel about this, but I think . . .”

“I’m not sure how everyone else will feel” is a typical speech weakener.

Too abrupt—“I’ve figured it out; here is what we are going to do.”

This comes across as selfish, and will make people more likely to resist your idea.

Good mix —“Hearing everyone’s thoughts has helped me to clarify the situation; here is
what I think we should do to move forward.”

This is a good balance between confidently sharing your opinion -and taking the due
credit-, while also acknowledging other people’s input.

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