r cooler...

At the wate

Hey, man. what's up?

Pete

Eddy

Pete the Programmer and Eddy the Editor often chit-chat at the water cooler in the afternoon to see if anything new and exciting has happened.

Noun Company Employees;

Eddy the Editor was about to ask Pete the Programmer what happened to his friend Anna the Assistant. She recently applied for an Administrative Assistant position at the Noun Company where they both work.
Pete beats Eddy to the punch and starts complaining about the new system memo. If the vice president doesn't take the time to look at his memo, why should i?

Implementation of the new HR system will be depleated January 7th. DO NOT USE PRIOR SYSTEM AFTER JAN. 6th. Be sure to take online training prior to accessing the new system into our learning management system. The Red Word system will increase efficiency, taking processes further, and communication. You're pleasant cooperation is grately.

Michael Manager, VP

as an editor, i know how you feel, pete. plus, He should not have used a semicolon (;) in the greeting of the memo. You always use a colon (:) at the beginning of a business letter.

The Nou n Compa ny plans new HR to imple system i ment its n Januar it. It's tr y, not "d ue that epleat" employe to comple es are en te online couraged training to use th before tr e new sy ying stem. Th in to the ey need learning to log managem access t ent syst he traini em to ng. (Mic also cou hael Man ld have ager written v managem ia our le ent syst arning em inste addition ad of "in , Michae to"). In l's lack o structur f paralle e causes l confusio saying in n. What the penu is he ltimate (s sentence econd-to ? It seem -last) s like M use the ichael m word Y o eant to u r inste which is ad of "Y a contrac ou're," tion of y he has m ou are. F isspelled inally, a word a omitted nd accid a word i entally n the las t senten ce.

Clarifica tion

he shouldn't have used all caps in that one sentence that tells us not to use the old system after january 6th. it makes me feel like he is yelling at me!
Emphasis

Think abo ut how yo ur audienc perceive y e will our messa ge. Empha words wit size h styling, such as it bold, and alic and avoid usin g all capit al letters.

i wonder if the VP knew how people would react to his poorly written memo.

it goes without saying that you should always use spell check in your email or word processing software...

In the example below, grammar check has marked an error with a squiggle underline. grammar check says the phrase is a sentence fragment although it is actually a complete sentence. So, why did grammar check get it wrong?

...but you have to be extra smart when using grammar check!!

the subject is the person or thing that the sentence is about.

the predicate is the rest of the sentence that describes what the subject does or is.

You Understood/Universal You

Grammar check thinks the subject is missing!

Sentences that tell you to do something, such as "Press Enter on your keyboard," are commands. Command sentences are also known as imperative sentences. They give instructions or requests. When you are telling someone to press the Enter key, you do not have to say "You press Enter on your keyboard" because the listener or reader already understands that you are speaking to him or her. This is also known as the Universal You because it could refer to anyone who is currently reading the sentence. With You Understood or Universal You, there is no third person involved in the conversation or writing. It's just you and I!

what else could we fix?

Parallel Structure

can + not = can't. remember the apostrophe!

's ogether. It s pushed t word is ns are two ontracts h Contractio flexes or c him. an athlete t closer to like when avy weigh ring a he s together uscles to b bring word m can s ctions, we h two word ith contra W er. We pus are them short me letters and make le, ow that so d then sh For examp ogether an ostrophe. t n ap y inserting a ntract, the d have co missing by ld an ion we use words wou r contract when the nothe nd rom can a ould've. A h comes f become w whic 're, which e is can't, wrote You all the tim VP memo, the ou're not. In his entence Y re in the s a . He didn't means you is grately ion write cooperat e meant to pleasant g raction. H se a cont un showin mean to u sive prono sses ich is a po ne. Y o u r , wh s to someo ing belong h that somet

Contractions

The Vice President also had a major parallel structure issue. It is difficult to understand what the following sentence means: The Red Word system will increase efficiency, taking processes further, and communication. It is best to use the same verb forms when listing actions. For example, Juan likes swimming, running, and skiing. The sentence has parallel structure. This sentence does not: Juan likes to swim, running, and to ski. This sentence is awkward because it does not have parallel structure. We could also rewrite it as Juan likes to swim, run, and ski. If we were correcting the VP's memo, we could write The Red Word system will increase efficiency, extend processes, and facilitate communication.
keep all items in a list in the same form to avoid awkwardness and confusion.

someday i'll have muscles.

Prepositions

Picking the correct preposition is not always easy, and sometimes more than one choice is appropriate. Here is a definition of preposition from dictionary.com: any member of a class of words found in many languages that are used before nouns, pronouns, or other substantives to form phrases functioning as modifiers of verbs, nouns, or adjectives, and that typically express a spatial, temporal, or other relationship, as in, on, by, to, since.

What would we do without prepositions? We wouldn't know whether to go through or around or to or beneath!

Water flows under bridges.

they don't call me eddy the editor for nothing!

In the VP's memo, he could have chosen a better preposition for his sentence about taking online training. Which preposition would you use instead of into? Be sure to take online training prior to accessing the new system into our learning management system. Would through, by, in, or since be the best preposition?

Be sure to take online training prior to accessing the new system through our learning management system.

pete, are you feeling any better now? I don't think the vp meant to make you feel like he was yelling.

i'll be okay.

so what ever happened to anna?

when anna applied for the job, her written communication was so riddled with errors that the ceo said he didn't want to talk to her!

ssistant Anna the A

Ass Anna job at the Assiistant applied the No s t a n t a p for j at p anobPe the Noun Companlied for a great d te w o un C mp y wh a g r e a a gand Pate worrk. Sheowoulny where Eddy t ood cen e good ca didatk.if he would haverbeEddy e S she c a r e f u l ndida d ave en about te if sh had bhen e been a e eh pcarctfu l about the grammad been more a un e ua tion in t h e g r a a r , u s a g more p c letunr.tuation her resmm ar, us e, and te um i letter. If the hnriher resume and age,eand cov r i ng m distrac I f t h e h n a e and distracted by eririr g manager hadcover intervi ted by ro s, he nager h n't been adn't e interviewed her.rrors, he would have been would ewed h have er.

Wher e's A nna? Anna t he

that's terrible!

i know. i feel bad. i guess it made a bad impression.

what can we do to help?

write tips on your eddy the editor blog, and I will point ann to it. great idea!

i'll tell her about subject verb agreement...

...and misplaced modifiers.

you misplaced what?

if you are writing about a single object, you must use a singular verb.

misplaced modifiers cause confusion. they describe the wrong thing when they are not in the right spot in a sentence.

for example, the red tulip grows. grows is the singular form of the verb.

let's get into more detail about subject verb agreement and misplaced modifiers.

if you are talking about multiple objects, you need the plural form of the verb. for example, the white tulips grow. grow is the plural form of the verb.

when you use the conjunction or or nor, singular subjects remain singular. for example, neither the red tulip nor the pink grow.

it also helps to know which pronouns are singular. each, everyone, somebody, anyone, and anybody are a few examples of singular pronouns. don't be fooled by what comes after the pronoun. For example, each of the girls picks flowers. the singular form of the verb is needed because it belongs to the pronoun each, which is singular.

now, what do we do when the modifiers get lost?

we must place them properly so their meaning is clear.

When a n adjec tive or the wro modifie ng spot r is in , it can sentenc make a e sound very fu an exam nny! He ple: Ma re is ria fou dog's c nd a pi ollar. T nk his sen sound tence m like th akes it ere is a running pink do around g withou we repl t its co ace the llar. If modifie then w r/adjec e can t tive, ell that pink, n the col ot the lar is dog. M dog's p aria fo ink co und a llar.

Misp laced Modi fier

how cute!

ifier Dangling Mod

A dangling modifier is a phrase or clause that is not clearly and logically related to the word or words it modifies (i.e. is placed next to). Unlike a misplaced modifier, a dangling modifier cannot be corrected by simply moving it to a different place in a sentence. Usually the dangling modifier appears at the beginning of the sentence, although it can also come at the end. Here is an example sentence: Yawning from exhaustion, the grapes dangled from her hand. It seems like the grapes are very tired, but we that grapes don't yawn, so who is yawning? Yawning from exhaustion, she let the grapes dangle from her hand.

it's difficult to tell who is doing what with a dangling modifier.

great! i think this will really help anna.

AWESOME. DO YOU THINK I SHOULD TELL THE VP TOO?

SURE, AS LONG AS I'M NOT THERE!

LOOKS LIKE WE DRANK ALL THE WATER!!! BACK TO WORK!