December 5, 2023

Dear Ms. Williams,

The purpose of this letter is to explain the revisions I have made as part of my final exam in
English 111. I will revise formal assignment three and the Artist's statement in this letter. This
assignment aims to educate others on the importance of bringing awareness of mental health to
athletes.

My writing has improved throughout this course. Before taking this course, I had difficulty
making sense of my writing. I never understood how to organize my writing to get my points
across to my readers, which caused my writing dread. Throughout the course, I found new
learning strategies to help me grow as a writer. Using bullet points and summarizing my research
would help me comprehend and improve my writing skills. I could use the bullet points to pour
all my ideas out, allowing me to organize them later in my writing. I could apply these strategies
to discussion boards and formal assignments, allowing me to practice my writing skills and see
the improvement along the way. I started to see improvement in my writing and enjoyed seeing
the growth I made with each assignment. But with this recent assignment, I didn't feel like I'd
improved. I knew I could have done better and what areas needed more work. So, when revising
this assignment, I tried to apply the strategies I've learned throughout this course to help me
improve my assignment and see a better result.

The original assignment and Artist's statement would earn me my lowest grade for this course.
My grade reflected my effort in my website and Artist's statement. From the start of the
assignment, I knew it would be the most challenging assignment posted for this course. Choosing
not to use my time wisely and focusing on the unnecessary parts of the assignment showed
through the grades I got. I spent too long with the little details on my website and left little time
completing my artist statement. While I made the deadline, the feedback would be eye-opening,
encouraging me to put more effort into my work and not slack off towards the end of the course.
I knew this assignment could have been much better as it was on a topic that I was passionate
about. So, I did just that, choosing this assignment to revise. It would allow me to demonstrate
my best work for this course and show how much this class improved my writing skills.

With the revision, my writing process started with a plan. I changed the layout for my website
and figured out what page needed more improvement. As for my artist statement, I changed my
format and what each paragraph would talk about to add more of a flow throughout the paper.
Using what I learned throughout the course allowed me to put my ideas into complete sentences,
forming my final assignment. With my revision, I would be able to strengthen my final result. I
included more information on the different factors going into my topic for my website. I included
photos, charts, and links for my target audience not just to have a description of the topic but to
include visuals to see the importance of how each topic related to the main idea of why it's
essential to bring awareness to athletes and their mental health. As for my Artist's statement, I
added more detail to my thought process of creating my website. In the statement, I improved my
introduction on why I chose this topic and its importance. Throughout the statement, I explain
why a website would be the best font for my audience and explain why a different topic is
essential and how it ties into my main topic of the importance of athletes' health and bringing
awareness in the high school aspect and understand the importance of a break and not go through
the negative th and struggling through silence without seeking help.

In my original assignment, my website lacked information on the topics that tied into my main
topic. I had very few descriptions and lacked other resources for my audience to understand. The
revisions allowed me to strengthen my topic and tie it into my main topic. Each page has more
explanation of the topic, including visuals, and starts to show how common each topic plays a
role in an athlete's mental health. As for my original Artist's statement, I didn't put much effort,
which showed through in my final result. My paper didn't have a flow, making it hard to read and
comprehend my process for this assignment. In my new revision, I changed the format and
changed what each paragraph was going to talk about throughout the process of this assignment.
This strengthened my Artist's statement and explained further in detail why this topic was
important to me. Overall, with the revision made in both the website and Artist statement, I
would say this showcases my best work from these courses.

However, there were some concerns regarding the website and Artist's statement. The main
struggle in the Artist's statement was the quality of the paper. I still feel it wasn't my best work
and could continue to work on it to improve and make it my best. As for my website, I think
there is always room for improvement. Having more time, I would continue researching and
including more information on my pages. I am adding more factors that affect athletes' mental
health—I also had a page on the benefits of acknowledging mental health and expanding it to
different levels of sports. I feel mental health is not as focused on in high school as it is in
college. Overall, I would continue working on this assignment to improve and strengthen it.

Reflecting on this course, I've learned a lot about how I was writing and what areas I needed to
improve. Before this class, I struggled with writing essays and was limited to specific subjects,
making it harder to try to write a well-based paper on a topic that was not interesting. Through
this course, I learned about the different writing styles that helped me expand my writing,
allowing me to find which suited me. In addition, I found strategies that helped me with my
writing skills throughout this course and even applied them to other works outside of this course.
This course not only helps improve my writing skills but also how to help others through peer
review. Instead of just reading over papers, I could apply what I've learned through this course
and help others. Overall, this class has helped me find common ground in writing and understand
that writing can be fun as it allows you to express yourself and your thinking. If this course were
longer, I would want to explore the different writing styles further and find other ways to expand
my writing journey.
Emily Nadel

Ms Williams

Artist's Statement

December 8, 2023

Artist's Statement

For this project, I wanted to bring awareness to athletes about mental health and

understand that taking a break from the game is okay. From a young age, athletes will find their

love for playing sports, continuing to play throughout high school. Athletes will put hours of

hard work into their sport to become the best version of themselves and often forget the mental

side of the game. I understand what it feels like to become overly consumed in a sport and lose

yourself as a person. It wasn't until my sophomore year that I had no choice but to step away

from the game to focus on my mental health. I went through a tough time not understanding and

feeling like I failed everyone. Only with time did I know that this break helped me grow as a

player and understand there was more to life than the game.

I want to educate other athletes to understand and be aware of the importance of focusing

on health rather than the game. In addition, I want to mention when it's time to step down and

take a break, helping others not go down the same path as I did in the past. In an athlete's career,

they will experience a mental struggle and frequently suffer in silence due to not having the

resources to seek help, resulting in risk factors. In this project, I directed my audience towards

student-athletes in high school as they will face the most pressure in trying to juggle school,

sports, and other activities. They will experience additional stress in gaining exposure to college
coaches, as many want to advance their careers to the next level. From what I've experienced and

watched, I've noticed that mental health is commonly forgotten and overlooked in high school

sports because of the few available resources out there for athletes as they do for physical health.

With this project, I want to bring awareness to high school sports to hopefully add more

resources available to student-athletes to prevent the mental game from limiting athletes from

furthering their careers.

I created a website during this project because most of this generation is online, and this

source would be most available to my target audience. While making a website, I had to think

about what would be most appealing to my targeted audience to keep them engaged throughout

the site. Initially, I had to think about the layout and how to present my information in a way that

would grab my audience's attention. I kept my lay straightforward. In addition, I had to figure out

my main topics to add to the website to educate people about the importance of mental health in

the sports world. While I figured out the topic and brought attention to all the common factors

related to the sports world, my next steps were to find out how to share my information while not

making it too long because this generation of people is known for their short attention spans. I

would say this was my main struggle: gathering all my information and not repeating myself

throughout the website. My solution was to add a brief description of what my topic would be on

for each page and add bullet points instead of all paragraphs to display my information.

The following steps were thinking about the navigation and adding resources to ensure

my website was easy to follow. I would add links and pictures to help separate my work. I have

then added signs and actions to grab the audience's attention and make them aware of the impact

of mental health in sports. On each page, I had a brief paragraph describing the topic. I added

pictures to sections of my paragraphs and, lastly, added resources to add more info for my
audience. In addition to concluding my website, I had to focus on the details. I recommend how

my audience will contain the info on running the site. I had to find strategies that would help me

make this website functional. I tried to put myself in their shoes, understand what they were

going through, and find solutions to help them. Each site page lists the cause, effects, and actions

to help my audience understand each topic that was given.

Throughout my project, I would change how I started as the beginning was too complex

and made it hard to complete this website. I knew making a website was a lot of steps and had a

lot of notches, so making sure not to cram everything at once was a big thing. With this project, I

want to take away the importance of recognizing mental health struggles in high school athletes

and help them understand the importance of self-care both physically and mentally. I also wanted

to break the stigma on mental health and normalize the importance of athletes taking a break to

focus on their health rather than the sport.

In conclusion, I would say most of this project was easy. I think the most challenging

part was the beginning and adding little details. My strategies to help me complete my website

were staying organized with my research, using bullet points for my main topic, and

summarizing what I read to help me comprehend what I researched. In addition, using feedback

helped me understand my most vital points and areas where I needed more help.