December 13, 2023

Dear Mrs. Williams, I have learned a lot from this course and have grown my writing skills
exponentially. Throughout this semester I feel this course has helped me excel as a writer and
really show my weakness and strengths and allow me to reflect on them to only prepare me for
far greater work to come. I choose Formal #3 for this due to the fact that I believe it shows the
most growth in my writing as well as having to do the biggest revision I have had to do on any
formal.

Before taking this course I had really struggled with writing and had taken this course to prove to
myself that I can make a positive impact on my skills and only exceed my expectations. Starting
off this course I felt as if I could only think of limited ideas and would constantly be holding
myself back and not letting my full potential out on paper. I feel this formal assignment really
helped me become more of a confident writer and think outside the box and allow myself to be
more creative. This hensing why I chose the short story option. I really wanted to challenge
myself and see what I was capable of doing. Writing this short story before the revision, I really
struggled with detail and character plot building.

My word count was also a pretty big affray for me trying to think of the next word to put down
just putting on foot in front of the other while writing this. After receiving my feedback for my
original piece of work, I nearly had to change everything and triple the size of the story of what I
originally had. Once I started writing I was able to be more creative and have the story just roll
off my head. Having an open mindset while writing this was a big part for me and I feel that will
really help me become a better writer later on. Building a character that the reader could really
connect with and understand was something I was able to do better, compared to before this
revision.

One of the reasons I chose this essay to represent my best work for this semester was the creative
writing aspect of it. It was around halloween and I had thought of the idea to do a creative short
story. I came up with the thought of making it scary and thrilling as well to fit the Halloween
time approaching. I feel it was one of the harder options for the latest formal and I wanted to try
and see for myself if I could create a detailed and creative short story that can also express the
creative side of it showing the thought process as I went on. When writing the draft I was
lacking a lot of the story that I didn't know I needed. I really struggled with word count when
writing this for the first time as well as not letting my mind drift off but instead really trying to
be by the book. I found canceling out the distraction around me and really hone in on my
mindset allowed for my mindset to flow a lot better as well as to be more of a creative writer by
blocking out the noise.

The feedback Mrs. Williams had really helped me tremendously with the revision on this
Formal. Without it, I would be somewhat blindsighted with all the upfront mistakes I had made
while writing this for the first time. A huge change I had added to my revision was the word
count which added more detail, plot, character development and overall made the work more
presentable. A big switch up for me was learning how to deal with change and having to delete
work that I had already made and trust in myself that I will make the change worth the while. For
the revision I had to completely redo the first half of the story adding a lot more plot to connect
the reader with what is happening and to make you feel more present in the moment. But
redoing the plot only helped make the story more enjoyable to read and now I can see how many
problems were in my originally final draft compared to my revision. All the changes I have done
really make me realize what I need to work on as a writer and can only help get better from here.

Using prewriting helped get the ideas down on paper and allowed for my future ideas I could add
to start flowing through my mind for the draft. For the draft I wrote it as if it was my final paper
and put as much information as I could down on paper and then later on for the final draft
finalizing what I had put down and filling the seams where if the story had any plot gaps that did
not make sense. Then after receiving my feedback and having the option to revise I took
constructive criticism and critique my work as much as possible. After revising, it had helped
with the overall structural development of my story and really made the whole story line flow
after rewriting the first half then adding additional charter development. Trying to add more tone
in my revision was a key thing I wanted to focus on as well aside from developing the story more
and adding additional parts/sense. Describing the setting was a factor that means a lot in creative
writing especially in this story. Really trying to set the mood was a factor that couldn't be missed
and made the story what it is now.

For my revision after altering my work I feel one of the strongholds is my word count. I believe
I had added just enough to express illuminating detail and really have the reader on the edge of
their seat while not having the story too long or too short. I feel another strong part of my
revision is the detail. Having detail and describing the moment that the character is in as well as
the surrounding environment to really set the tone/mood of the story is very important. I
definitely had felt more confident after revising and really had opened my eyes to work that I
thought was good but in reality had a lot of missing information and holes in it. This was my
motive to make a great piece of work and cancel out the flaws in my writing that I had struggled
with and really focus on making the paper great with no short cuts.

One thing I felt that I did not pay enough attention to was the narrator's point of view, I felt if I
had more time I could have perfected this and really dialed it into the story. This goes for
character development as well, the story could have a way better description to go along with the
characters and really tie into the over theme to further express what is really happening and why.
Having more time would have been keen to having a longer more expressed paper as well. I was
not in the best mindset when writing this but more of a ¨just finish it¨ mindset instead of really
taking my time and focusing on the weaknesses that I struggle with when writing and really
make sure to do it to the best of my ability. In reality I really just don't have the proper
experience to make a perfect 10/10 paper. I need years of practice as well as many trial and error
pieces of work to even come close to being a good writer. But, this is all with time and even
though this paper is not perfect it has helped me grow as a writer and take steps into the right
direction even though the work isn't perfect.

Starting this class I was nowhere near what I am capable of now. This class has really presented
me to work that has gotten me out of my comfort zone when it comes to writing. And overall
has desensitized my work load. Before this class I would think any work thrown at me is long
and dreadful etc, now I am more confident in my writing capabilities and just overall being a
more confident student/writer. If I had more time this semester I would go back and strategies
my thinking over all the assignments completed this past semester. I would go over my thought
process and how I did certain things and critique them for the better and really show my growth
over these past few months as a writer.

Overall, English 111 has been nothing but good for me, and has really helped me become a
better writer. I applaud you for making such a good course for all writers across the board.

Sincerely, Blake.

Blake Woodie

Blake Woodie

Prof. Jessica Williams

English 111

21, November 2023

Short Story

Deep in the Appalachian Mountains, in the midst of the fog and dense fall weather, is

where you can find the Smith family. Their family has lived there for generations upon

generations and has seen many things over the years, to say the least. For the youngest in the

family, you have Joel. Joel´s an 11-year old boy who has grown up in the mountains all of his

life. He hasn't had many friends growing up and has been more to himself, not really talking to
other kids his age, being more of an outcast. The parents have nearly really called their parents

Joel and really been there for him. Growing up, he has been more of an independent individual,

never relying on the people around him.

During Joel's childhood, he had a lot of mental health issues, constantly being in and out

of the mental health hospital, never being able to be seen as a so-called stable individual. His

parents would constantly be coming late after a night out drinking and could never really support

their own kid, even when he needed it most. At times, they would only make his stability worse

by offering him nothing but a house to come home to. At times, his dad would often beat or harm

him due to his relationship with Joel's mother never really being steady.

The only person ever there for him has been his aunt. The aunt has really held out her

hand to Joel in the sense that he never really had parents. After the first time Joel actually spoke

up about getting beaten, he went straight to his aunt, who denied having put up with such abuse.

He took him in as her own and decided to let him stay at her own house. Her house is located in

a more social area compared to Joel's parents house, where they are engulfed in trees surrounded

by dense, dark forest. After moving into his aunt's house, she decided to send him to school to

get more social experience and come out of this mental state he had been stuck in for so long.

Once school started, Joel could never really connect with the kids around him and started

to always be seen as an outcast in his grade. Teachers were constantly telling his aunt that he

needed mental help and time to socialize and get out of his comfort zone. She tried just that, but

once again, it never really connected with Joel and yet again left him in the same position. The

only person he could open up to was his aunt. She constantly made him feel safe and at home,

something his parents were never to do.

 This is all until one night, when suddenly his aunt's house catches fire from a lighting

strike due to the major storm happening outside. The fire spreads rapidly throughout the house,

not taking long for it to reach inside the house. Soon Joel hears the crackling, burning sensation

and jumps out of bed to see what is causing the commotion. It doesn't take long for him to find

that half the house is ablaze, burning to a crisp, while both he and his aunt are still inside. He

steps into action immediately, going into his aunt's room and trying to wake her. Violently

shaking her in a panic, I tried to wake her as the fire crept in from the walls. But there was no

luck. Joel had to step out to keep himself safe, slowly walking away, watching his aunt's death

happen right in front of his own eyes.

Barley makes it out the door. Joel sees the fire department start to show up, but it's too

late. Shes gone. He collapsed to his knees, balling his eyes out, not knowing what to feel. After

minutes go by, Joel looks back up near the woods, and the huge blaze lights up the property

around him with a faint orange glow. Standing aside in the woods, he sees a heart-dropping,

demonic-looking figure. It sits there motionless, almost as if it had created the fire itself, looking

over at the work that it had accomplished.

The next day, Joel gets sent back to his parents house for a place to live until further

action can be taken for child protective services. Going back left him in the same situation he

was in before his aunt took him in as her own. Though the abuse had let up, they still showed no

remorse for what Joel had just gone through, experiencing all this at such a young age. He

constantly kept telling himself,She was right in front of me; all I had to do was save her and get

her out! But I didn't. In his mind, he believes he killed his aunt and even watched her death. This

sent his mentality down a dark path. He was constantly thinking about being able to save her and

wanted to do anything to go back to that moment in time. But he just couldn't.

 Weirdly, after this, Joel found more peace just being alone in the woods away from the

hell hole he was in. He would grab supplies out of his dad's garage, such as wooden boards,

planks, blankets, and even old couches, to build a fort deep in the woods where no one could

bother him. Joel would often come back before dark, knowing it was a long, dark path to get

back. Though he had flashlights, he still didn't want to put himself in that position. The next day,

he decided to bring out a huge piece of plywood to finish one of the main walls, finally

completing the overbuild of his fort. To do this, he had to bring out an old wagon he found in his

yard because the board was too long for him to carry by himself. Due to the wagon, it took him a

lot longer than usually just walking over there, and because he wasn't paying attention to the

time, this did not leave him enough daylight.

He decides to still go back anyway, so his mom isn't wondering later why he isn't in bed

or where he could be. He packs his bag and brings along his flashlights and an old hunting knife

his pops had gotten him. He begins his journey through the dark, dense forest, following the path

in front of him step by step. Until he hears leaves being crushed by something that sounds bigger

than a deer, Joel's stomach sinks to his feet, and as he shines the flash light around, he sees

nothing. He tells himself it was just a joke and moves on like he didn't hear anything of any type.

This was the rule in Appalachian folklore: If you hear something, no, you didn't; if you see

something, no, you didn't. Though the noises just kept getting louder and louder, with each step

sounding closer to him, almost as if he were being hunted, He breaks the rule once more,

frantically turning on every light he has and shining it around the trail, hoping to not see

anything.

Then he shines it just to the right of this tree, revealing something sinister. A tall, dark

figure stands by the tree. The eyes shone red when the light was pointed at them. Joel was left
frozen, still on the trail. Once the creature started to move towards him once more, he dashed.

Leaving all his stuff on the trail behind him and even dropping a flashlight. His mind was blank.

Not being able to process what had just happened, he just knew to run.

Running through the woods in what could only seem like a nightmare, Joel looks back

and sees two faint red glowing eyes off in the distance—something you would only see in a

horror movie. The screeching of what sounded like a human screaming at the top of his lungs

kept getting louder for Joel as he started to become frail and out of breath from the exhaustion.

As he reaches his house, the noises around him stop. He no longer sees or hears this demon-like

creature following him, almost as if it had disappeared into the abyss like it was never there. He

sprints inside out of breath, trying to tell his parents what had just happened to him.

Heś so quick to speak the words come out blathered, the parents think he's just seeing

shadows again. Years ago, Joel struggled much more with mental health after the passing of his

aunt. Since she died, it has really forced Joel´s parents to change their ways and reconsider their

choices for the sake of their own son, no longer having them get sent to jail over fights or rehab

over drinking problems. Joel is now 13; their relationship isn't all there, considering they haven't

been here for him all his childhood and throughout. Truthfully, the parents think Joel is crazy and

has never really recovered from his depression, and they believe he has gone insane.

Part of his mental health comes from the environment he is constantly in; even the house

has a depressing tone to it being located in such an isolated area. Being deep in the Appalachian

Mountains has a very isolated feel to it. One would say it was almost an uncomfortable feeling.

Joel had never felt at home; he would constantly be seeing human-like figures through the

household, almost like the house was possessed. He would constantly tell his parents this, but
they would not put up with it. As the figures got worse, Joel kept telling himself that it's just the

medication and that it's not there; that way, his parents wouldn't send him to the insane asylum. It

didn't work. Joel ends up spending a year at the correctional asylum, only sending his mind into a

spiral. At all times, he was alone with his own thoughts, which were his worst enemy. Feeling all

alone and empty inside, he realized no one was there for him, giving him the most gut wrenching

feeling lasting for months on end, almost as if he were forgotten about for eternity.

Once Joel was released and classified as "sane" from the hospital, he never really talked

to his parents, even compared to the little he did before they sent him off. The only people he

would talk to were the imaginary people he had created in his mind. These people were Joel's

friends who would only do damage to his mental health, putting him in a dark state of mind. The

figures around the house only kept getting worse. One side of him didn´t know if they were real

and to be frightened by the sight or if it was just that he was deemed insane and this was a side

effect of such. Until one night, when he woke up with a deep gash in his arm, as if it were a claw

that had made it. In bed, at about 3 in the morning, the wind blows the curtain just enough for the

moon to shine a glimpse of light on this 9-foot-tall figure over Joel. Sitting there helplessly, he

gazes in shock, not moving an inch, until a blink of an eye and the figure disappears. The first

thought on his mind was if this was the same creature he had seen in the woods weeks ago.

When morning arrived, Joel was shocked by what had happened. He knew his parents

wouldn't believe him, and telling them would only potentially put him back in the insane asylum.

So he decides to just keep it to himself, not telling anyone what happened. As the nights go on,

Joel only sees more occurrences of this demonic being, showing no stop. The next night, he was

even more on edge, not knowing if it was going to be a normal night or one with a demonic

figure attacking him in the middle of the night. At about 2:34 a.m., he finally starts to doze off
into a dream. It starts off as a normal day at his aunt's house, coming home from school and

enjoying a snack, until suddenly it cuts to that dreadful night. It shows the demonic figure

starting the fire at his aunt's house, purposely doing this to kill her and try to kill Joel as well.

As he watched all this happen in his dream, it felt so surreal. He was once again watching

it all happen in front of him and not being able to do a thing about it. He then wakes up in a

panic, sweat dripping down his body, his heart racing faster than ever, and a pain-taking

headache like no other. A couple days later, Joel only sees more occurrences of this demonic

being until one night he decides to try and make contact with it. He grabs a Ouija board and

summons the figure. He asks multiple times who and what this is, but gets no response. Then

suddenly the board starts levitating, doors slam shut with the locks turned, and windows bang as

the board starts floating up. Out of nowhere, Joel's TV turns on, blaring an old television

channel. Joel looks back at the board and sees the figure sitting across from him, the same one

from the prior night.

Joel asks one question: Did you kill my aunt?"The board starts moving. Weeks go on

with no sign of the sightings stopping. Until one night Joel gets up around midnight to go to the

bathroom, seeing the closet across the hallway glowing reddish orange around the seams of the

door. As he creeps up on the door, he starts hearing faint screams and fire, almost as if someone

were being burned just behind the door. He pried it open, revealing an almost eternal hole in

what appeared to be hell. Immediately, he steps back after seeing this, knowing his house is a

gateway to hell. His heart drops. He instantly goes to his parents room, no longer caring about

what they think about him; he grabs them and leads them to the door. They open the door and see

the horrific sight in front of them. Quickly grabbing the phone, they reached out to their preacher
friend, whom they had known for years. Instantly after calling the preacher, the dad gets

snatched into darkness, followed by a heartbreaking scream.

Joel knows the demonic figure wasn't too prone to the pastor coming over to cleanse the

house of such demons. Waiting for the pastor felt like the longest 10 minutes of his life, standing

there with a gun holding on to his mom, not letting his sight off of the figure around him. He

screams out for answers from the shadow figure. He asks, Why me? Why would you kill her and

do this to me? No response until eerily a scraping noise as if someone were walking down the

hall with their nails dug into the wood. It replies, "Joel, your mind is playing tricks on you again.

You watched yourself leave her there, killing the only person who ever mattered to you. Joel

knew this wasn't true and was just another mental game this demon wanted to play on him.

Finally, the pastor reaches them and starts desensitizing the house from the dark energy

possessing it. Crosses, holy water, and many other forms were all used to banish the beings.

Weeks later, Joel notices how his life is really taking a turn for the better. He is no longer

constantly battling himself in a mental battle and is more at peace with himself. The same goes

on at home. There is no more uneasy feeling being in the presence of his own home anymore. He

finally felt at peace with himself for who he truly was.