Let’s Talk about

Love, Relationship, Marriage

Pre-Intermediate

Intermediate
You’re expected to answer the following questions by the end of this lesson:

1. What do you think makes a relationship work well?

2. How important is talking openly and honestly in a relationship?
3.Can you share a nice experience you had while dating someone?
4.Why is trust so important in a marriage?
5.How do you handle differences in culture or religion when dating?
6.What advice would you give someone thinking about getting married?
7.How has your idea of love changed over the years?
8.What are some common problems couples face, and how can they be fixed?
9.How do you deal with arguments in a relationship?
10.Why do you think some marriages end in divorce, and how can this be prevented?
11.How can couples avoid misunderstandings in their relationship?
12. Why is compromise important in a marriage?
13. Why is taking care of yourself important in a relationship?
Pre-Intermediate
Falling in love vs. staying in love
All romantic relationships have happy and tough times. They need effort and
commitment to change with your partner. Good relationships need a few important
things to work well. First, it's important to talk openly and really listen to each other.
This helps create trust, so you can depend on and believe in each other. Another
important thing is having similar interests and goals, which is like having things you
both enjoy and want. Spending enjoyable time together, doing things or talking,
make the connection stronger. Supporting each other when things are good and bad
makes the relationship safer. Finding solutions together when there are problems is
also important. It's also good to give each other space to grow separately.
Lastly, being able to handle changes in life and face challenges together make the
relationship stronger. Every relationship is different but understanding each other
and growing together are important to make it work well.

Tough times: difficult/hard/bad times

Effort: physical or mental activity needed to achieve something = Hard work
Commitment: a promise to do sth
To depend on sb/sth: to trust someone or something and know that that person or thing will help you
or do what you want or expect him, her, or it to do.
Enjoyable: making you feel happy
 Spending enjoyable time together, doing things
Just a piece of Grammar! or talking, make the connection stronger.

It’s easy to learn English. Supporting each other when things are good
Learning English is easier than what you think. and bad makes the relationship safer.

Sub + verb + … Finding solutions together when there are

problems is also important. It's also good to
give each other space to grow separately.
(change this sentence to a gerund + verb)

Learning >> Learn + ing Gerund = Noun Being able to handle changes in life and face
challenges together make the relationship
stronger.
Listen to the audio files below and answer the
questions below:
How long each couple is married for?
What is their secret for a long-lasting relationship?

1 2
The importance of open communication in a healthy
relationship:
Talking openly and honestly is really important in a relationship. It means sharing your
thoughts and feelings without hiding anything. When people do this, they build trust
and understanding with each other. It's like creating a strong base for a good and lasting
relationship. When you talk openly and honestly, you can solve problems better, handle
tough times, and make decisions together. It helps partners really know each other and
builds respect and closeness.

Build respect/closeness/a strong relationship/trust/connection

The importance of open communication in a healthy
relationship: (Cont.)
Imagine you're feeling upset about something that happened at work, but you haven't
shared it with your partner. If you talk openly and honestly, you might say, "Today was
tough at work, and I'm feeling stressed about it." By expressing your feelings, your
partner can offer support or just listen, and you both can work through it together. This
sharing helps build a connection where you feel understood and supported.
On the other hand*, if you keep your feelings to yourself, your partner might not know
what's going on, and they won't have the chance to offer comfort or help. Open
communication in this situation allows you to lean on each other during tough times,
making the relationship stronger. It's like having a teammate who knows what's
happening in your life and can be there for you.
Feel upset/happy/stressed/loved/scared etc.
Express: show
To have the chance to do sth: to have the opportunity to do sth
To lean on sb: to depend on sb for support
on the one hand ... on the other hand
used when you are comparing two different facts or two opposite ways of thinking
about a situation:

• On the one hand, I love the freedom of being single, but on the other hand, the
idea of being married and having a family is very attractive.
• On the one hand, I'd like a job that pays more, but on the other hand, I enjoy
the work I’m doing at the moment.
• On the one hand they'd love to have kids, but on the other, they don't want to
give up their freedom.
 Trust is like the glue that holds a marriage together!
It's super important because it creates a strong foundation for a healthy and lasting
relationship. When you trust your partner, it means you believe in their honesty, and
dependability. This belief makes you feel secure and confident in the connection you
share. In a marriage, trust allows both partners to be open with each other and share
their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. It builds a sense of
dependability, knowing that you can count on your partner to always be there for
you. Without trust, misunderstandings can happen, and the foundation of the
marriage may weaken. So, trust is not just about believing in your partner but also
about creating a safe environment where the relationship can grow and be successful.

A strong foundation: The foundation of something such as a belief or way of life is the things on which it is
based.
Lasting: continuing to exist for a long time or for ever
Dependability: the quality of being able to be trusted and being very likely to do what people expect
To count on sb: to depend on sb
To weaken: to make sth weaker
 Abdel Kader Al Ahmar, 56 (Algeria) and Natalie, 52 (France) explain the secrets of a
successful cross-cultural marriage:

How did you meet?

Abdel Kader: I visited France in 2016 for a work event. That’s where we met. I was attracted to
Natalie’s elegance and then fell in love with her character. We were only together for a few
months before we got married*.
Natalie: I was attracted to him the second we met. I also liked how friendly, and nice he was.
What do your families think about your relationship?
Natalie: My family was unsure. You often hear about unsuccessful marriages between people
from different countries, relationships that end in divorce, and struggles over children. But
they eventually changed their mind about him and now he’s part of the family.
What interests do you share and what do you disagree on?
Abdel Kader: I like heavy meals; Natalie likes healthier ones. The things we disagree on are always minor. We never
disagree on major things.
Natalie: Like Abdel says, we’ve never had disagreements which might ruin our relationship.
The second (that) … : as soon as
Eventually: in the end, especially after a long time or a lot of effort
Minor: having little importance, influence, or effect, especially when compared with other things of the same
type ≠ Major
Abdel Kader Al Ahmar, 56 (Algeria) and Natalie, 52 (France) explain the secrets of a
successful cross-cultural marriage: (Cont.)
How do you make a marriage work?
Abdel Kader: When you're dating someone from a different culture or religion, it's
important to talk openly and be respectful. Share where you come from, your beliefs, and
your traditions. This helps you understand and respect each other. Appreciate the
differences you both bring to the relationship, like your cultural and religious backgrounds.
Take the time to learn about each other's backgrounds and show genuine interest in your
partner's identity. Finding things you both enjoy, despite the differences, can make your
connection stronger.
Natalie: As your relationship grows, be open-minded and try new things together, like
celebrating each other's traditions. Talk about how these differences might affect big
decisions in the future, such as weddings or raising kids. Find solutions that respect both of
your backgrounds. By being understanding, open to new experiences, you can build a
strong and lasting connection in your relationship.
Appreciate: to recognize how good someone or something is and to value them or it.
Take the time (to do sth): to spend enough time to do something well or carefully.
Genuine: real, honest
To affect (verb) >> /əˈfekt/ / effect (noun) >> /əˈfekt/
 When you use to marry or to get married, think about the wedding. When you
use to be married, think about the person's life now.

to get married: this talks about the time two people got married. It makes us think of the
wedding.
• Are you getting married?
to get married to (someone): We think of who was married in the wedding. Do not say I got
married with someone. It is incorrect.
• We got married to each other 5 years ago in Korea.
to be married: This means a state of being. Are you married or are you single?
• Are you married? Oh, you’re not?! I though you guys were married to each other.
to be married (to someone): Also state of being.
• I’ve been married to my husband for 10 years.
to marry (someone): this is the general verb. It is the time when people come together as
husband and wife. Do not say I married with someone. It is not correct. And do not say I
married to someone.
• He’s marrying his girlfriend of 8 years.
• Will you marry me?
• I married him 10 years ago.
Fill in the blanks:
1. Is Jim single or married? He
2. Who did he marry? He Susan.
3. Where did he get married? He London.
4. Is Anna single? No, she
5. Who is Anna married to? She Juan.
6. What is Jolene going to do this Saturday? She is going to Mike.
7. When did you parents each other?
8. How long have you two been ?
 Thinking about getting married?
Here's some advice to consider. First and foremost, make sure you and your
partner can communicate openly and honestly. Discuss your feelings, plans, and
any worries you might have. Take the time to really understand each other. Know
your partner's values, goals, and expectations. When disagreements happen, and
they will, deal with them with respect and work together to find solutions.

Secondly, always support each other. A strong partnership means being there for your spouse during both good times
and challenges. Don't forget to keep the romance alive by regularly expressing love and appreciation for each other.
Discuss your long-term goals and plans, such as where you want to live and whether you want children. Be transparent
about money matters, discussing financial goals and how you'll manage finances together. It's also essential to have
some independence while being part of a couple. Allow each other space to follow personal interests and grow
individually. Get advice from trusted sources if needed, and always celebrate each other's achievements and successes.
Remember, a successful marriage is built on love, respect, and a willingness to grow together.
To discuss: to talk about
Expectation: the feeling of expecting sth to happen
Appreciation: showing that you are grateful for something that person has done
Transparent: open and honest, without secrets
Essential: important, necessary, needed
Achievement: something very good and difficult that you have succeeded in doing
Listen to the audio file and write down the
four habits that the speaker is explaining.
Here are a few extra examples with the words we learned in this lesson:

1. Tough times may need extra effort and commitment to get through.
2. Find enjoyable activities to build respect and build trust in your relationships.
3. Always express your feelings to have a chance to strengthen your friendships.
4. Good friendships are based on a strong foundation of trust and dependability.
5. True friends are those you can count on to be there for you when you need them.
6. Both big and small moments create lasting memories that you'll cherish eventually.
7. It's nice to appreciate even the minor achievements and take the time to celebrate them.
8. In relationships, have genuine talks to discuss your expectations and understand each other.
9.Show appreciation for those who take the time to support you and be transparent about your
own feelings and thoughts.
10.Expectation can sometimes lead to disappointment, so it's important to be transparent and
set realistic goals.
Intermediate
 Till death do us part…
All romantic relationships go through ups and downs, and they all take work,
commitment, and a willingness to adapt and change with your partner. But whether
your relationship is just starting out or you’ve been together for years, there are steps
you can take to build a healthy relationship. Successful relationships have a few
important things that make them work well.
First, talking openly and really listening to each other are crucial. This helps build trust, which means you can rely on and
believe in each other. Another big thing is having similar values and goals, which is like having common ground to build
on. Spending good time together, whether doing things or talking, makes the connection stronger. Supporting each other
in good times and bad makes the relationship more secure. Finding solutions together when there are problems is also
crucial. Being emotionally close, which means sharing feelings, is like adding a special layer to the relationship. It's also
important to give each other space to grow individually. Lastly, being able to adapt to changes in life and face challenges
together makes the relationship stronger. Every relationship is different but understanding each other and growing
together are key to making it work well.
To go through ups and downs: to experience both positive and negative aspects in a situation, relationship, or
life in general.
To take a step to do sth: to start an action
To build trust: to develop trust
To have common ground to build on: to have shared interests, beliefs and opinions to make something work
Is love enough?
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship
It goes without saying that communication is vital in any relationship. Without
communication, most relationships fail to work. Communication is not only vital
for growth, but it’s also essential for building a long-lasting and fulfilling
relationship. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship
Communication allows you to effectively share feelings, opinions and
expectations. Many people fail to communicate due to a fear of rejection or the
fear that they’ll end up upsetting or even losing their partner, family members or
friends.

It goes without saying that ...: it’s obvious that

Vital: necessary and extremely important
Long-lasting: continuing for la long period of time
Fulfilling: satisfying, when something is fulfilling, it makes you happy and satisfied.
End up: to reach a particular place or achieve a situation after other activities
To upset sb: to make sb worried or angry
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship
(Cont.)
Couples who communicate effectively are more likely to understand and respect
each other's needs and boundaries. When your partner comes to you to discuss
an issue, don’t put them down. Don’t become defensive and assume you know
what the other person is thinking. Instead, give your full attention to them and
listen carefully. Don’t listen to respond, listen to understand.

To be likely: if sth is likely, it’ll probably happen

Put sb down: to make someone feel silly or not important by criticizing them
Defensive: too quick to protect yourself from being criticized
If you're trying to win, you've already lost.
To resolve conflicts: to solve problems
Sacrifice: to give up something that is
valuable to you to help another person
Outcome: result
If you’re a sports fan, you know the feeling of wanting to win. When you’re faced
with a challenge, you not only want to overcome that challenge, but also want
to show that you are the winner in that competition (1). That mindset is great
for sports, but for relationships, it’s not successful. Couples that learn how to
resolve their conflicts rather than try to win (2) arguments are more likely to
have successful relationships than partners who try to “beat” each other. Because
no matter how strongly you want to prove that you are right during an argument,
or how much you want to get your way, when one partner wins, both partners
lose.
Fight to Resolve, Not to Win!!
Instead, look to resolve conflicts. Communicate about what you both need from
each other, make personal sacrifices if necessary, and see how you can move
forward without worrying about who wins and who loses. You’ll find that the
outcome of the argument is much better for you and your relationship in the
future.
Side Note 1:
• You not only want to overcome that challenge, but also
want to show that you are the winner in that competition.
Parallel
I love not only cookies, but also pies.
He’s not only intelligent, but also funny.
She speaks not only German but also French.
Side Note 2:
• Couples that learn how to resolve their conflicts rather
than try to win arguments are more likely to have
successful relationships
Rather than + Base form of the verb
I prefer to walk rather than drive.
She likes to read rather than watch TV.
They decided to stay home rather than go out.
Jason decided to apologize rather than argue with his friend.
If you're trying to win, you've already lost. (Cont.)
Imagine that Janet and Alex have been dating for a while, and Janet has been
feeling a bit ignored. She realizes that they often go out with friends, and
while she enjoys those moments, what she truly needs is more quality time
with Alex, just the two of them.

In a "winning" mindset, Janet might face Alex, expressing frustration and

emphasizing that she wants him to spend more time with her alone. Alex,
feeling defensive, might argue that they already spend a significant amount
of time together, especially with friends, and doesn't see the need for a
change. Now, if they shift to a resolution-oriented approach, Janet could
express her feelings more openly, explaining that she values their time
together and misses the intimacy of one-on-one moments. Alex, instead of
trying to "win" the argument, could actively listen to Janet’s needs and
consider ways to incorporate more exclusive time into their schedule.
Quality time: time that you spend with someone, giving them your full attention
because you value the relationship
Frustration: the feeling of being annoyed or less confident because you
cannot achieve what you want, or something that makes you feel like this
 Your feelings and ideas matter, even if they are
different from mine."
In relationships, people often have different opinions or preferences
about things like where to go or what to do. This can lead to
disagreements or conflicts, and that's where compromise becomes
important. Compromise means working together to find a solution
that both partners are okay with. It's not about one person always
getting their way; it's about respecting each other's thoughts and
needs.
A therapist says that compromise shows respect for each other. It's a way of saying, "Your feelings and ideas
matter, even if they are different from mine." In a healthy relationship, it's not always about agreeing, but
about finding middle ground and solving differences in a way that respects each other. Compromise is seen in
various parts of a relationship, like planning dates, expressing love, sharing household chores, spending time
together, and deciding on holiday plans. It's a key skill in making relationships work well and treating each
other with kindness and understanding.
Middle ground: a halfway or neutral standpoint.
Compromising vs Sacrificing
Listen to the audio file and explain:
What’s the difference between compromising and sacrificing?
How do we build trust?
Feelings of trust tend to be built in small moments such as when we show up
for each other, listen when others are upset and when we prioritize our
important relationships over other people and things. Trust is essential to
what makes human communities of all kinds work. In other words, without
trust there can be no meaningful connection between people.

Trust may mean different things to different people. Researcher and

educator, Brené Brown, emphasizes the importance of breaking down the
concept of trust into specific qualities and behaviors so that it can be more
easily understood. Brown offers the acronym BRAVING to share qualities that
contribute to building and sustaining trust in relationships with partners,
friends, family members and co-workers.
 Here’s you practice:

Watch the video in the next slide and explain

what “BRAVING” stands for.
Provide a short explanation for each piece.
Read the questions again and answer them using the words you learned in
this lesson:
1. What do you think makes a relationship work well?
2. How important is talking openly and honestly in a relationship?
3.Can you share a nice experience you had while dating someone?
4.Why is trust so important in a marriage?
5.How do you handle differences in culture or religion when dating?
6.What advice would you give someone thinking about getting married?
7.How has your idea of love changed over the years?
8.What are some common problems couples face, and how can they be fixed?
9.How do you deal with arguments in a relationship?
10.Why do you think some marriages end in divorce, and how can this be prevented?
11.How can couples avoid misunderstandings in their relationship?
12. Why is compromise important in a marriage?
13. Why is taking care of yourself important in a relationship?