Evening of October; it rained outside; The candle from TJMax shared its heat

and light with the surroundings. I couldn’t fall asleep even though everything around me

suggested to do so. That night I understood that I should quit my passion and move

forward without it.

It all started six years ago in Kazan City, Russia, when my father suggested I

spend winter break in a robotics boot camp. At first, I was hesitant about the idea, but I

agreed and eventually won my first pretty huge robotics competition a few months after

the camp. I repeated the success the next year and occasionally lost interest in robots,

transitioning to way more respected competitive programming instead. I spent every

break from school in boot camps, sharpening my skills and giving almost all my free

time to programming.

Year after year, I improved my skills and won contests on the city level, but when

it came time to compete with the best in the country, I failed. Disappointed, but not

broken, I continued to master my skills, leaving my hometown for the whole summer to

reach my goals. I hoped that my efforts would pay off because colleges were ready to

accept those who succeeded in particular competitions without any tuition or exams. But

then my family won a green card, making us free to live in the US. I concluded that I

couldn’t decline this opportunity because of boundless perspectives in the IT sphere, so

our family moved to the United States.

Being pretty gregarious, I searched for communities similar to the one I had

joined in Russia and found a few. However, I found a significant difference in the US -

the system does not value competitive programming as much as it used to. Universities
no longer hunt for people who can solve specific problems; they want diverse,

multifaceted, motivated students.

For the first time in three years, I had to change the course of my life, the scale of

self-estimation, and my values. I was no longer unique, precocious, gifted, or whatever -

I had to earn this status all over from the beginning using unfamiliar methods. Collapsed

and despaired, I fell into an emotional crisis, regretting the time I wasted on competitive

programming.

After some time, I realized that being in constant despair was not the best

strategy, so I decided to agree with the system's rules and follow the paths it suggested.

Surprisingly, it went pretty well. The knowledge and speed of thinking I acquired from

my field were pretty useful in other areas that had something in common with my former

occupation. Although I did not receive constant accolades for implementing these skills,

I could show my competence in other areas. Moreover, I discovered that big companies

require such capabilities for high-paid positions, but they want to see a college degree

as well, so I just need to wait a little bit for it.

Honestly, I am still not completely sure about how it affected me, but I can see

some changes. After such a transition, I became more open-minded about new

hobbies, activities, and sports. Receiving such a carte blanche, I realized that I don’t

have to choose one particular path, and I can expand my potential in any direction I

want. Moreover, I know that one day I will take advantage of the work I have done

before, but right now I should concentrate on other things.

In life, we may encounter situations where we have to abandon our passions due

to unexpected events like immigration, funding cuts, or health problems. It can appear
challenging to move on from something we have invested so much time and effort into.

However, we should never treat such hard work as a boondoggle - we should

remember that our experiences shape and mold us into the people we are today. Even

if we have to let go of our passions for a while, we can always find ways to integrate our

skills and knowledge into our future endeavors. Our former passions can serve as

stepping stones to new opportunities and experiences. As we navigate through life, we

will undoubtedly encounter obstacles that challenge us to adapt and grow. It is crucial to

approach these challenges with an open mind and a willingness to learn and evolve.

Although it may be difficult to let go of our passions and move forward, it is often the

best decision for our overall growth and well-being. We should remember that our

experiences, no matter how seemingly insignificant, can become valuable assets in our

future endeavors. By taking advantage of our former passions, we can develop new

skills and knowledge that will serve us well in the future. Ultimately, everything we do

will pay off in the future, even if not in the way we originally planned.