Writing task 1

Crit e ria
desc rip t ion
 Task achievement
Task requirements Overview Features
Main trends Key features
Describe trends
Differences
Compare where relevant
Stages

1. Includes all the key trends accurately

2. Compares the trends
Band 7.0 of TA requires these:
3. Highlights the unit of measurements
4. Precisely mentions the tenses in the graph
5. Uses synonyms to avoid repetitions
 Task achievement
A band 5 overview:

When looking at the bar charts, we can see that the international tourism and dairy products
increase and that of meat products decreases.

1. Errors in format: It seems that the diary first increases then decreases instead of increases
throughout the period.
2. Lack of measurements: Moreover, there is no mention of the unit of measurement. Looking
carefully, we can see that the measurement is “income from a particular industry” in billions of
euros.
 Task achievement
A band 6 overview:

When looking at the bar charts, we can see that the income from the international tourism industry
grows and that in the meat products industry decreases. Also, the revenue from the dairy products
industry shows a rising and falling pattern.

1. A lack of description of the tenses => Do not fully cover the requirements
 Task achievement
A band 7 and probably band 8 overview:

In general, it is obvious that the revenue from the international tourism industry is forecast to grow
while that in the meat proudcts sector is set to decline. Also, the revenue from the dairy product
industry will display a rising and falling pattern.
 Coherence & Cohesion
Organization
Band 7.0 of CC requires these:
Linking words Structure of a paragraph
Theme sentence +
points to support
1. Definition of the kinds of graphs
2. Logical and lucid sentences
3. Highlights of the unit of measurements
4. Accurate description of the trends
5. Indications of the time frame
6. Clear signal of the graph that it refers to
7. Appropriate usage of cohesive devices
 Coherence & Cohesion
A band 5 report:

Introduction: Apparently, these graphs show the major investigated information about the
Southland’s main exports in 2000, 20xx and with forecast to 2025.

Overview: By observing three bar graphs, we can see that two of the items increase but
another decreases. The graphs cover three years of income but one of the year time is not
clear.

1. In the introduction, the candidate is trying to use synonyms to paraphrase the word “main
exports”, albeit in a way that is confusing.
2. There is no clear definition of the kinds of graphs that it is talking about.
3. The last sentence is also ambiguous.
 Coherence & Cohesion
A band 6 report:

Introduction: Apparently, the bar graphs show information about the Southland’s main exports
in 2000, 20xx and with forecast to 2025.

Overview: By observing three bar graphs, we can see that two of the items will increase but
one will decrease over the period in question.

1. There is no unit of measurement or definition of which item it is referring to in the

overview.
2. Also, the description “two of the items will increase” is not accurate as the graph of dairy
products first increases then decreases.
 Coherence & Cohesion
A band 7 and probably band 8 report:

Introduction: The bar charts illustrate data about three kinds of exports, measured in billions
of euros in Southland in 2000, 2016, and with predictions to 2025.

Overview: In general, it is obvious that the revenue from the international tourism industry is
forecast to grow while that in the meat product sector is set to decline. Also, the revenue
from the dairy product industry will display a rising and falling pattern.
 Lexical Resource
Range of vocabulary Repetition/ spelling word order
 Lexical Resource
A band 5 report:

We can see that the international tourism industry had the best income in 2000. The
international tourism industry will grow from 2000 to 2025. In that time, the revenue from
dairy products has grown, too. In dairy products graph, we can see dramatic changes from
20xx to 2025. In the beginning, dairy products were not famous. In 2025, meat products will be
reduced.

1. Word choice is inappropriate: “the best income”; “not famous”

2. Repetitions.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Variety Number of errors Grammar choice

1. Tenses
2. Punctuation
3. Singular and plural forms of words
4. Mistakes in capitalization of words and articles such as “a”,
What should be aware of? “the”
5. Errors in subject-verb agreement
6. Repetitive sentence structures
7. Not having a range of simple and complex structures
 Writing task 1

pie chart
The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors
in Canada in 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and
reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
 Understanding data
1st 2st smallest
2005 Electronics Home Video games
and appliances furnishings

2010 F&B Electronics Home

and appliances furnishings

Trends
 Overview
Overall, Electronics & Appliances and Food & Beverage
accounted for the highest proportion of online
shopping sales for the retail sectors in Canada during
the years 2005 and 2010.

Overall, there was a significant change in the largest

sector in terms of online shopping sales for the retail
sectors in Canada during the years 2005 and 2010.
While Electronics and Appliances and Home furnishings
witnessed an decreasing trend, the remaining sectors
saw an adverse tendency.
Body
Size

Trends

Years
 Body
At 35% we can see that electronics and appliance sector
accounted for the majority of online sales in 2005, but this
percentage had dropped to 30% by 2010. During the same
five-year period, as an increasing number of people chose
to purchase food and beverage online, we can see that
transactions went from just 22% to 32%, making it the
retail sector with the largest overall proportion of the
online market.

In 2005, the home furnishing industry boasted an

impressive 25% of the total online sales in Canada.
However, by 2010, the figure had fallen considerably to
15%. Interestingly, online sales of video games eventually
overtook sales of home furnishings, although video games
still represented only 23% of the market.
 Sample
The two pie charts compare the percentages of online sales across different retail
sectors in Canada in the years 2005 and 2010. For three of the sectors, it is evident that
over this time frame there was significant change in their proportion of online
transactions.

At 35% we can see that electronics and appliance sector accounted for the majority of
online sales in 2005, but this percentage had dropped to 30% by 2010. During the same
five-year period, as an increasing number of people chose to purchase food and beverage
online, we can see that transactions went from just 22% to 32%, making it the retail
sector with the largest overall proportion of the online market.

In 2005, the home furnishing industry boasted an impressive 25% of the total online sales
in Canada. However, by 2010, the figure had fallen considerably to 15%. Interestingly,
online sales of video games eventually overtook sales of home furnishings, although video
games still represented only 23% of the market.
LEt’s practice
Warning: The practice
question is difficult.
Are you ready?
The graphs show information on various garbage disposal techniques used in a certain nation between
1960 and 2011.

Overall, the quantity of paper, food, and other garbage that was disposed of significantly decreased
throughout the time period. Contrarily, a greater proportion of plastic, wood, and food was discarded
by consumers. An additional point is that the disposal of other things stayed fairly steady.

Initially, a quarter of paper was thrown away in 1960, but in 2011 this percentage decreased by 10%.
Concerning textiles, this sector likewise had a minor drop of 6% (from 17% to 11%) during the same
time period. Additionally, in 2011 people eliminated 3 times less additional waste than the original
figure of 13%.

Furthermore, it is evident that compared to 2010, the amount of plastic and food waste increased by
nearly 10% in 2011. Additionally, consumers disposed of two times as much wood in 1960, amounting to
8%.

Lastly, glass, metal, and green garbage disposal rates all stayed fairly consistent during the time
period. In particular, just around 5% of glass was thrown away compared to the disposal of the two
latter categories at around 9%.
https://jamboard.google.com/d/1csWcpU4sTvl5ExCMvAiF-
AYrtoevpeYitpZGqpxJy84/viewer?mtt=qx8rpoe286d5&f=2