Bl

urr
edLi
nes

Pr
ologue

“
All
aroundmear
efami
l
iarf
aces

Wor
noutpl
aces,
wor
noutf
aces

Br
ightandear
lyf
ort
hei
rdai
l
yraces

Goi
ngnowher
e,goi
ngnowher
e

Thei
rtear
sar
efi
l
li
ngupt
hei
rgl
asses

Noexpr
essi
on,
noexpr
essi
on

Hi
demyhead,
Iwantt
odr
ownmysor
row

Not
omor
row,
not
omor
row”Gar
yJul
es

Idi
alhi
snumberforthe5thti
me.Deadt one.Hasheblockedme?Iwonder .Iwoul
dn'
tputi
t
passhi
m.Ideci
det ogototheshopsbeforetheycl
osebutfi
rstIneedtocheckhowmuchthere
i
sinmyaccount.Igotomybankingapp.Cr ap!Nodat
a.Nowwhat ?Ijustdon’
twantt
owaste
mypetr
olandgot oanATM fornoreason.Ihavenochoi
ce.Ineedt ocooksupper
.

“Ki
ds.
”Iscr
eam andaf
ewsecondsl
atert
heycomer
unni
ng.

“Putyourmor
ninggownsonwehav
etogot
otheshops.
”Ii
nst
ructandt
heyr
unbackt
othei
r
roomsnoquesti
onsasked.

They’
vebeendy ingtogetoutofthehouse.InanycaseIdon'tf
eelcomf ort
abl
eleav
ingthem
al
onefortoolong.Myy oungestdaught
erNt hat
isi
,shei
sthreeyearsold,comesbackweari
ng
di
ff
erentshoes.Idon’
tcare.Ihavenoti
met oargue.Myot
herdaughtercomesbacklooki
ng
pr
oper.Sheisfi
ve.Hernamei sKhothatso.Theyaremyreasonforli
vi
ng.

No, I
’m notasingl
emot her,wellIam.Sor tof
.Theirfat
heri
sali
ve.Hemi ghtaswellbedead
though.I’
m notbeingbitt
erit’
sthet r
uth.Thepowerofpussyhashi m bytheball
s.Hemov edout
almostay earago,actual
lyIkickedhim out.HesaidIwasdriv
inghim crazy.Youwouldtooi
f
yourhusbandst art
edcomi ngbackhomeear lyhoursofthemorningsmelli
ngofcheap
perfumesandl ipsti
ckonhi sshirt
.Ohy esIdaresayy ouwouldtooifhi
ssidechicksentyouhi
s
nakedpi
csofhim sl
eepi
nginanunfamil
iarbed.Enoughwasenough.Iknewmywor
thsoI
ki
ckedhi
m out.Hebeggedclai
mingtochangebutIdon’tgobackf
ormyv omi
t.

I
nhopesthatIwouldreconsidermydeci
sionandtakehim back,
hestoppedpayi
ng
mai
ntenance.Thecourtgrantedmethehouse.Hegotthecarsandanotherf
latweownedout
oft
hedivorceset
tl
ement .Ohandhismoneytoo.

Hi snamei sTsietsi.Hei saTOS.Hest i

l
l t
hinksImi ghttakehim back.Thest upiddeci
sionIev er
madewhenIwasst illblindedbyl ovewast ost opwor ki
ng.Itmi ghtnothav ebeenagl amor ous
j
obbutasaPAIear nedasal ar
yandpai dmybi llsunt
iltheTOShappened.Ibecamea
housewife.Hel eftmewi thnomoneyandnoj obandwehadsi gnedapr e-nup.Ohy es,it
favouredhim andhi smoney .Hecomesf r
om moneyandhashi sown.Iwasl uckytohav e
gottenthehouseandt hef urnit
ure.Thej udgeal sodemandedt hattheTOSgav emeR200000.I
havebeenl i
vi
ngof ft hatf orthepastei ghtmont hs.I
t’
srunningout .Mai ntaini
ngt hehousei sno
j
oke.Theschool f
ees, anot herstory.Daycar efeesareaday l
i
ghtr obber yifyouaskme.Ihav e
toclotheandf eedt heki ds.TheTOSdoesn' tcare.Heisst i
l
lbitterthatIdon’ twanttotakehi m
back.Whatbaf flesmei st hathest ayswi t
ht hesidechick.Ican’tsellthehouseasher efusesto
sign.Hisnamei sst illoni t.

Lookingforaj obi nthi

sprovi
ncewi l
ldr
iveyoutodepression.It
’seit
herI’m notquali
fi
ed,not
enoughexper ienceornotoft heri
ghtage.Icanseethelookst heygivemesomet imes.Maybe
theyarelookingf orPA’sonthepetit
eside.WithmybodyIl ookolderthanmyage.That ’swhatI
thi
nkany way.Myf ri
endalwaystell
smeI ’
m gorgeous.It
hinkshei sbiasedsoi tdoesn’
tcount.
NoI ’
m notinsecur e.I’
mreal
isti
c.Il
ovemybody .

Wegett othecarandIhel ptheki

dsf astentheirseatbelt
s.Nt hat
i i
sattheagewheresheis
exercisi
ngherindependence.It’
sfrustrat
ingbutev ent
uallyshemanages.Isayal it
tl
ecallt
ot he
universeandstartt
hecar .Itst
art
swi thnof uss.Thankthest arsforsmallmerci
es.I
t’
sbeen
giv
ingmepr obl
emsl atel
y.Ithi
nkit’
sthebat terybutIcannev erbet oosur
eIcan’taff
ordtotake
i
ttot hemechanics.It’
sa2001Toy otaTazz.Iboughti tcashf orR30000.Thisisaft
ertheTOS
personallycametofetcht heBMW X6hehadboughtf orme.

Igettothenearestshoppi ngcomplexloadthekidsinat rol

ley.Nthat
i i
sf i
ghting.Shewant sto
pushthet r
oll
ey.Ibeli
ev ethi
schil
dwassentbyherf athertohelpmakemyl if
ediffi
cult
.Idon’t
haveti
met ocheckmybal anceatt
heATM.Igost rai
ghtt oPicknPay .Pickal lt
henecessar y
thi
ngsbynecessar yImeanabr aaipack,nevert
houghtIwoul duseoneoft hosebutlif
ewi l
l
humbley ou.I
tdoesst retchespeci
all
ywhent wopiecesar ecutintosmal lerpieces.Iaddtwo
l
itt
erofmi l
k,nonamebr andcornfl
akes,abagofmi xedvegetablesandal oafofbread.Iavoid
goingthesweetsisle.Ihav etwochocolatemonstersonmyt rol
leyandt heyar enotafrai
dto
makeascene.
Igettothet
il
landwaitf
ortheper
sonbef
oremet of
ini
shwithhertransact
ion.Ienv
yhertr
oll
ey.
It
’swhatIwasusedtoonceuponati
me.Ican’
trememberthelasttimeIhadanov erf
lowi
ng
tr
oll
ey.Youcanseebythecardshei
susingt
hatshehasitcovered.

Ifeelsomeonest andbehi
ndme.Theyhavethedecencynottoi
nvademypersonalspace.You
knowt hosethatcomesocl oseanysl
i
ghtmovementyou’l
lbedoi
ngcoit
us.Icatchawhi f
fof
hiscologneandIknowi t’
saman.Hesmellswonderf
ul.

Il
oadmygrocer
iesont hecount
erandcr
ossmyfinger
s.Thetot
ali
sR137andsomecent
s.I
haveR42i
nmypur se.Igi
vehermycardandanot
hercall
totheuni
ver
se.

“Sor
rysi
sii
t’
sdecl
i
ned.
”Coul
dyouscr
eam anyl
ouderbi
tch.No,
Idi
dn’
tsayt
hatl
oud.I
’
mtoo
poli
tet
o.

“Tryt
hisone.
”Isayassof
tl
yasIcoul
dmast
er.I
t’
sTsi
etsi
e’
sol
dcr
edi
tcar
d.I
’
m hoppi
nghe
for
gotabouti
t.

“
Iyal
asi
si.
”Fuck!

“Mmhm canyoucancel
thetr
ansacti
onexceptfort
hemilkandbread.
”Icanseeherget
ti
ng
annoy
ed.I
t’
sherjobmoss!Shepressest
hebuzzerandcal
lsfort
hesupervi
sor
.

“
Sisi
,youcanaddi
twi
thmyst
uff
.”Adeepsmoot
hvoi
cecomesf
rom behi
nd.

Iturnar
oundt ot hankmysav i
our.Dot heysti
ll
maket hem thisgor geousandt al
l?Iknowhei s
tal
lbecausehei st al
lerthanmeandI ’mt al
l.Hei snotl i
ghtbutnotdar keither.Chocolateist he
colour
.Wi t
hthickey ebrows, l
ongey elashes,womenpaymoneyt ohaveandt heclearestey es
everseen.Isthatev ennor malonaman?Hehasasl i
ght l
yshar pnosewhi chisont hebigsi de
butdoesn'tdi
stracty oufrom hisbeaut y.I
taddschar acter.Hehaswi del i
pswhi chareper fectly
proport
ionedanddef i
nit
elykissable.Ev er
ythi
ngi sjustinpl ace.I'
m notsur eifhei sduef ora
shaveorhei sgoi ngforthat5o'clockshadowl ook.Whi chev eritis,worksforhim.Heseemst o
beingreatshapet oo.Mywomanl ytreasuresst artfl
ut t
eri
ngi nappr eci
ation.Hei sindeedaf i
ne
specimen.Thet hingsIwoul ddot ohim.Gosh, howl onghasi tbeensi nceIgotl aid?Ineedt o
verysoon.Lustingaf t
erstrangersinasuper marketisnotl adyl i
ke.Thenagai nIwasnev er
consi
der
edal ady.Ihearsomeonecl
eart
hei
rthr
oat
.Il
ookupt
ofi
ndhi
m wi
thhi
sey
ebr
ows
rai
sedwait
ingforananswer.

“Sor
ryIdi
dn’
theart
hat
.”Iqui
ckl
yrespond.

“Iaskedi
fther
ewasany
thi
ngel
se.
”Hedr
awl
s.

“
Not
hanky
ousomuch.HowcanIr
epayy
ou?
”

“Don’
twor
ryabouti
t.
”If
eel
dismi
ssed.Iwasn'
tof
fer
ingmybodyy
ouass.

Imov
eal
ongandpackmyt
hingsi
nonebag.Hepay
sandobv
iousl
yhi
scar
disl
oaded.

Isaymyt hankyou’
soncemor et henpushmyt r
oll
eyoutofthere.Wegeti
nt ot
hecarafter
l
oadingthekidsandthegroceries.It
’sj
ustafter7pm andIsti
llhavet
ocook.Lif
eisnotf ai
r
sometimes.Isi
tbehindthewheel t
henat hi
rdcalltot
heuniverseasItur
nt hei
gni
tion.Nothi
ng.
Istar
tagainandsti
llnot
hing.Ihitthesteeri
nginfrust
rat
ionandIenduppr essi
ngthehooter.

“Ar
ewest
uckagai
nmommy
.”Khot
hat
soasks.

“It
hinksobaby
.”

“Calldaddy.”Nthatiwhines.Itryitagai
nandstil
lnothi
ng.Iputmyheadont hesteeri
ngwheel
andt r
yt ocomposemy self.If
eel l
ikecry
ingr
ightnowbutIdon’thavetheluxuryoftears.Ther
e
i
sashar pknockonmywi ndow.Il ookuptof
indmysuper her
owi thanenqui r
inglookonhis
face.Ireal
lydon’tneedtobei nt hi
sguy ’
smercytwicewit
hinanhour.Irol
lmywi ndowdown.

“Youneedhel
p?”Iwantt
osaynobutKhot
hat
sobeat
smet
oit
.

“Mommy
’scarwon'
tst
art
.”Theyar
etr
ulyTsi
etsi
e’
ski
ds.Theyl
i
vet
otor
tur
eme.

“Openthebonnet,Icanj
umpstar
tyou.Doy
ouhav
ejumpi
ngcabl
es?
”Ishakemyhead.I
haven’
tgot
tenaroundbuyi
ngt
hose.
“Ok,
I’
ll
giv
eyouapush.Doy
ouknowhowt
oki
ckst
art
?”agai
nIshakemyhead.

“Waithere.
”Li
keIhadsomewher
etogo.Hehur
ri
esawayandaf
ewsecondsl
aterhecomes
backwithtwocarguar
ds.

“Maj
i
tasi
cel
aizandl
apl
ease.
”Heaskst
het
women.

“Suregrootman.
”Theygobehi
ndt
hecar.Heopenst
hecardoorashewait
sformetocomeout
.
Irel
uct
antlycomeout.Imeant
hemanpaidformygr
ocer
iesIdon’
tthi
nkhecoul
dst
ealmyol
d
car.

Iwat
chastheypushhi
m butt
hecarwon'
tst
art.Theypushhi
mf oracoupl
eofmi nut
esandI
seet
hem gi
vi
ngup.Hemanagestoparki
tbythesecuri
tygat
e.Iwalkuptothem i
ndefeat
.

“Idon’
tthi
nki
t’
sthebat
ter
y.You’
l
lneedtotakeitint
omor
rowt
ohav
eitchecked.
”I’
mthi
nki
ng
ofthet
owingcost
sandalr
eadymymi ndi
sspinning.

“Thanky
ouf
ort
ryi
ng.
”I’
m ont
hev
ergeoft
ear
sri
ghtnow.

“Come,I’
lldropyouoffathome.
”Undernor
malci
rcumstancesIwoul
dref
usebutr
ightnowI
’
m
desper
ate.Ihavehungryki
dstof
eedandit’
swaypastt
heirbedti
me.

“I'
dappreci
atethat.Thankyou.”Iopenthedoorandtakeoutthekids.Hehelpscarrythepl
asti
c
bagandleadsust ohi scar
.Hedr i
vesthel
atestRangeRoversport
.Iputthekidsattheback
andfast
entheirseat bel
tswhi
l
ehe’ sbusyloadi
ngourgrocer
yintheboot.Het hankstheguys
wit
hmoneyof fcour seandwedr i
veoff.

Af
tergi
vi
ngthedir
ecti
onsit
’stotalsi
l
ence.Thecarisfi
l
ledwit
hhi
sscent
.Thel
uxur
yremi
nds
meofmyoldcar.That
’sanotherli
feIhavetof
orgetabout.

“I
’
m Sazi
byt
heway
.”Hesay
saf
terawhi
l
e.
“Lona.
”

“Pl
easur
etomeety
ouLona.Theki
ds?
”

“Khot
hat
soandNt
hat
isi
.”

Wefallbacki
ntosi
lence.Ist
eal
alookathi
sforear
msashest eersthecar
.Her eal
lyi
sstr
ong.I
wonderifhewoul
dbeabl etopi
ckmeup.Idoubt.Tsi
etsi
couldneverdoit
.JustthenInot
ice
t
heglit
teri
ngpl
ati
num bandonhislef
tfi
nger
.Toobad.Afteraser
iesofdir
ecti
onswear ei
n
f
rontofmygate.

“Weher
e.Thanky
ouagai
n.You’
vebeenal
i
fesav
erSazi
.
”

“Youarewelcome.”Hestaresatmef orl
ongerthannecessar
y.I'
mt hefi
rsttol
ookaway.Iopen
mydoorandgett heki
dsfrom theback.Nthat
isii
sal
readyfal
li
ngasleepsoIdecidet
ocarryher.
WhenIturnaroundIbumpi nt
oasolidwall
.Ifeelwarmthspreadsthroughoutmybody.I
ser
iousl
yneedtogetlai
d.

“Here.
”Hegivesmemyshoppingbag."Remembertohaveyourcart
owedt
omor
row.
Other
wisei
ftheshoppi
ngcomplexdoesItf
oryou,
itwi
llbemorecost
ly.
”

“Okay
.By
e.”Hewat
chesusaswewal
kthr
ought
hegat
e.Iwonderwhathemustt
hinkofme.

Igettot hehouseandi tstoolatetocook.Cor nfl

akeswi l
l do.Afterwef i
nisheati
ngIpr eparethe
kidsforbed.OnceIputt hem tosleep.Igotomyr oom andt akecareofmyper petuali
tch.My
rabbi
t’sbatteri
esar edead.Fuck.Wi l
lIevergetabr eak?Ev enmyDI Yi sbeingsabotaged.Iplace
i
tont hepedest alanddeci detodoi ttheoldfashi
onway .Isli
demyhandundert heblanketand
I’
m alreadywet .Thiswil
lbeshortandswi f
t.Animageofacer t
ainsuperherof l
ashesthr ough
mymi ndandI ’
m onmywayt onir
v ana.Ist
artconjuringupi magesofhi m withmeagai nstthe
wallashepoundsi ntomer epeatedly.Myt oescurl asIreachmyor gasm.Isquasht hegui l
t
thatIfeel.I
t’
snotr eal
lycheati
ng.I’m onlyusi
nghisi maget opushmeov ertheedge.Whatheor
thewif edon'tknowwon' thurt
.It
’snotl i
keI’
llev
erseehi m again.

Mynamei
sLonaSoml
otha.I
’
m adi
vor
ceeatt
went
ysi
x.Imar
ri
edTsi
etsi
whenIwast
went
y
one.Bi ggestmi stakeofmyl i
fe.Hewasachar merwhousedhi smoneyt ohisadv antage.My
parentsdi edwhenIwas16andIhadt omov einwi t
hmygr andmot herwhost ayedinaf our
room inTembi sa.Whenshedi ed,myuncl etookov erthehouseandImov edtohi sshackatthe
back.Lucki l
yf ormeshedi edr i
ghtafterIgraduated.I’
m notsur eit’
spr opertosayl uckil
y,a
blessi
ngi ndisguiseismoreappr opr
iatemaybe.Iwoul dhav edoneany t
hingtoleavet hathel
l
hole.Itwasonl yahomewhenmygr andmot herwasal ive.Tsiet
sicameal ongandsweptmeof f
myf eet .Shower edmewi t
hgi ftsandmoneyIdi dn’
tev enknowwhatt odowi th.Fourmont hs
afterwemetIwasexpect ingandamont hafterwardswewer emar ried.Ihadonl ybeenwor ki
ng
forsixmont hsbyt hen.Hetol
dmet oqui tmyj obashewoul dnev erhav ehiswi f
eslav i
ngfor
someoneel se.Igl adl
ycomplied.Iwasaf oolwhot houghtshewasi nl ove.

Thati
sthepastIneedtoputbehi
ndme.Ihavebeenlooki
ngforajobforalmostsi
xmonths.
NotevenoncehaveIbeencall
edforani
nter
view.It
ryt
ofall
asleepbutIcan’
tseem t
o.I
fther
e
waseverati
meIneededabot tl
eofwinei
twasnow.

I
’m notsurewhenIfel
lasl
eep.Iwakeupt ofi
ndthekidsmakingamessinthekit
chen.Il
et
t
hem fini
sheati
ngthei
rbreakf
ast.I
’
m sureinthei
rli
tt
lemindstheyt
hinkt
heyerehel
ping
mommy .Themesstheymadehasj ustaddedtomyload.

Iwal
ktothemainroadt otakeataxit
othei
rdaycare.I
tonl
ycost
sR15butitt
ookf
orev
ert
o
come.Aft
erdr
oppi
ngt hekidsoffIgopasst
hegarageandbuyair
ti
methendeci
det
owalk
home.Ineedt
heexerciseanyway.

WhenIgethomeItakepi
ctur
esofsomeoft hef
urni
tur
eandelectroni
csIdon’
tneedandplace
anaddonGum Tr
eeandJunkMai l
.It
’sgoodqual
it
ystuffandIknowitwil
lsel
lespeci
all
ywi
th
thepr
icei
t’
sat
.

Amomentl at
erIhearahoot
eroutsi
de.Igotocheckt
ofi
ndSazi
’scarbythegate.I
’m surpr
ised
andshockedtoseehim.Whatt
hehellishedoi
nginmyhouse?It
houghtt
hev i
siti
nmyf ant
asy
woul
dbeouronl ycont
act
.Igoouttoseewhathewants.

“Goodmor
ning.
”Hef
lasheshi
sper
fectsmi
l
e.

“Mor
ning.
”Ir
espond.
Mycur i
osit
yispeaked.Hemust n’
tthi
nkapackofbr aaimeatisthekeytomypussy .Hegets
outofhi
scarandwal kstowardsme.Slimf
it
ti
ngf adedj eansshowcasinghisst
rongleanl
egs
wit
hagr eyt-
shi
rt
.Hel ooksr
eall
ygood.Mycookieflutter
sinresponse.I’
m ahoe.

“Ihadyourcart
owed.Her
ear
ethedet
ail
soft
hegar
agei
t’
sin.I
’
veset
tl
edt
hequot
ati
onaswel
l
.”
I
’m pi
ssed.

Wher
edoeshegetof
fset
tl
ingmyany
thi
ng.

“List
enSazi.Icanpayownway
.Ifyout
hinkyoucanbutt
ermeupwi t
hmoney,wr
onghouseboo.
Trynextdoor.
”Isaythi
swit
hallt
heconf
idenceIcoul
dmasterconsi
der
ingmypr
edi
cament
fr
om lastnight.

“Geesl
ady
.Sayt
hankyouandmoveon.Her
eisther
ecei
ptwheny
ou’
vecomet
oyoursenses.
Youwel
come.
”Hegiv
esmet her
ecei
ptandwal
ksaway.

“Wai
t!HowdoIpayy
ouback?
”

“Youdon’
t.Gi
vei
ttochar
it
yorwhat
ever
.”Heget
sint
ohi
scar
,st
art
sanddr
ivesaway
.

Il
ookatt
her
ecei
pt.Fuck!I
tcostmor
ethani
tdi
dwhenIboughti
t.Whot
hef
ucki
sthi
sguy
?

Chapt
er2

“
Baki
n'soda,
Igotbaki
n'soda

Baki
n'soda,
Igotbaki
n'soda

Whi
pitt
hrought
hegl
assni
gga

I
'
m bl
owi
n'moneyf
ast
,ni
gga”O.
TGenasi
s

Thedayoftheint
ervi
ewhasarriv
edandI’
m shi
tt
ingmysel
f.Ihopethest
arsar
einal
i
gnmentf
or
me.Ireal
l
yneedthisone.Iwokeupext
raearl
ytodaysoIcouldhav
eenoughti
metogetr
eady
anddropofft
hekidsatdaycare.
RightnowI’
mlookingatmyr efl
ectioni
nthemir
rorandI'
m notsureaboutmyoutfi
t.I
’
v e
changedsomanyt imesalmostmywhol ewardrobeisout.Onl
ytor
eturntomyini
ti
alchoice.I
l
ookf at
.NoIfeell
ikeagiant.I
’m notsur
eaboutthecurl
yweaveeit
her.MaybeIshould’
vegone
forthenat
ural
lookbutthat’
sjustnotme.Whendi dmyboobsgetthisbig?

It
akeadeepbr eat
h.Thi
sisit
.IneedtogobeforeI
’
ml at
eforthi
sinter
view.Itakemybagand
walkout
.OnethingIdon’
thavetoworryabouti
smycar.Idr
ivetotheplacefoll
owing
‘
Veroni
ca’
s’di
recti
ons.Whoeverinv
entedGPSwasv er
ysmart.Thegreatestgif
ttowomen.

MaybeIshouldinventsomethi
nginsteadofworkingforsomeone.Maybeabusiness.Where
woul
dIgetthecapitalf
rom?Sellt
hehouseper haps.I’
vealwaysbeengoodwit
hmyhands.Ican
dohairmay
beIneedt otakethebeautici
ancourse.Thenmay beopenabeautysalon.Thereis
somanyofthem though.Agh.Thisisnot i
meforpipedreams.Thesmallvoi
cesti
llwhispers.I
t
coul
dbeareali
ty.

I’
m par
kedinfrontofonethemostbeaut i
fulbui
ldingsI’
veseen.Thesepeoplehadanideaand
execut
edit
.Igetoutofthecarandwal kintothebuildi
ng.It
’sasbeauti
fulonthei
nsi
deasitis
ontheout
side.Iwalktotherecept
ionareaandst atemyr easonforbei
nghere.Theladydi
rect
s
met oani
Padt ocompleteasetofquestionsandt henacar dispri
ntedoutwithmynameoni t
.

“Takeal i
ftt
othe5thf
loor
.Thewait
ingar
eawillbeonyourl
eft
.You’
l
lfi
ndot
herappl
i
cant
s
ther
e.”Shesaysgi
vi
ngmet hecar
d.“Usethati
nt hel
i
ft.
”

“
ThankYou,
”That
'sal
lImanage.I
’
mtooner
vous.

Iwalktot heli
ftandscant hecard.Itopens.Theshor tr
idefeelsli
keawal ktowar dsmy
executi
on.Ihav en’tbeentoani nterviewiny ears.Theliftopensat5thfloor.Ast heladysaid,I
fi
ndacoupl eofpeopl einthewai t
ingar ea.Wear eallnervousexceptforone.Shei sgoingon
abouthergr eatreferencesandexper i
ence.Istartdoubtingmy sel
fagain.Ionlywor kedforless
thanay earandt hatwassi xyearsago.Idon’ tevenmeett hecrit
eri
aoft woy earswor k
experi
ence.Imi ghtcar r
ythequal i
ficati
onbutt hatmightnotmeanmuchatt hi
smoment .MsPA
univer
sehasov ersev enyearsofexper iencecombi ned.Atsomepoi ntshewor kedforami nist
er
, soshesay s.I
’l
l t
akeherwor df orit.

Iobser
veaspeoplegoi nandoutoft
hisof
fi
ce.Theygoinlooki
nghopeful
andtheycomeout
l
ookingli
kethecatsthatdr
owned.Noonecomesouthappy .I
tmustbetoughint
here.EvenMs
PAUniverse.It
houghtshehadmoreofanadvantagebutnope.Shel
ooksworsethantheother
s.
“MsSomlot
ayoumaygot hrough.
”Myheartl
eapst omyt hr
oatanditst
art
sbeati
nghard
agai
nstmychest.Igetuponshakyl egsandf
ollowt hel
ady.Sheknocksonceandopensthe
doort
oletmein.OnceI ’
mi nshegoesbackclosingthedoorbehi
ndher.

Thisi
sahugeassof
fi
ce.Ther
eisal
adyi
nsi
desi
tt
ingandshei
sgoi
ngt
hroughaf
il
e.Notev
en
oncelooksi
nmydir
ect
ion.

“Takeasi t,
”shesayswit
houtl
ookingup.Thatalonemakesmemor enervous.Il
ookaround
thi
sof f
ice.Hugeoakdeskwit
hmi ni
mal t
hingsontop.Theareuni
tswhi
chcouldbefil
ing
cabinet
sononesi deandasitt
ingareaontheother
.Ithassomuchunusedspace.It
’sacold
off
icethatlacksanyper
sonalt
ouch.

Ilookbackt
othel
adytofindheri
ntent
lyl
ooki
ngatme.I’
veneverseenawomanmorebeaut
if
ul.
Herlooksal
onei
nti
midateme.Sheisontheski
nnysi
de.Ican’
treal
lybet
oosur
e.Sheseems
tall
.Coul
dbemyheight
.

Shecont
inuestostareandi
t’
sbecomi
ngawkwar
d.I
’
m notsur
ehowt
oreactatt
hispoi
nt.Her
st
areisabitunset
tl
ing.

“MsSomlotha,wel
comet
oRi
char
dsI
nc.Pl
easet
ell
meabouty
our
sel
f.
”Real
l
y!I
sthatst
il
lan
i
nter
viewquest
ion?

It
’satri
ckyonet hi
squest
ion.Youneverknowhowmucht oshar
e.DoIt
ellherI
’m adiv
orcee
witht
woki ds.ThatIhadj
ustsoldmyf urni
tur
et otr
yandmakeendsmeet .Thatmightbeover
shari
ng.Idecidetotal
kaboutwhat’
srelevanttothejob.

Herfacedoesn'
tgiv
eanythi
ngaway .I
tremai
nsneut
ral
thr
oughoutmyenti
respeech.Shegiv
es
meat hor
oughcheckoutasiftry
ingtoimagi
nemycapabi
li
ti
es.I
t’
ssi
lentforawhil
euntil
she
snapsoutofwhateverpl
aceIhadjustbor
edhert
o.

“Thatsoundsv
eryimpr
essi
veMsSoml
otha.Youwil
lhearf
rom usverysoon.
”Iknowabr
ush
offwhenIseei
t.Thi
scan’
tbet
hewhol
eint
ervi
ew.Justoneambiguousquest
ion.

“
Thankyoufory
ourt
imeMam,IhopeIdidn'
toffendyou.I
t’
sjustt
hatI
’mtooner
vousandI
r
eal
lyneedt
hisj
ob,
”Ist
andupandgetreadytogo.Shestandsaswell
comesaroundt
hetabl
e.
Fucksheisboss!Sheisdressedi
nabeauti
fult
ail
oredgr
eysuit,of
fwhit
egorgeousblouse
j
udgingbywhat’svi
sibl
e.Sheissl
im.Pr
obablyasize32even.Iknowsheissexyunderthatsui
t
andsheknowsittoo.

Theheelshehason,I’m notevensur
eIcoul dpullt
hatoff
.Howdoesshewal kinit?Iknow
shoesandthisisaChrist
ianLoubouti
nbl ackstuddedheel.Shehasherlonghai rti
edinaneat
painf
ull
ooki
ngbun.Isitev enherhai
r?Seemsl i
keit.Herl
ightfl
awlessskin.Idon’tthi
nkshehas
everhadapimpleinherlif
e.Sheisgorgeous.Sheonlyneedst osmileali
ttl
e.Herbossmode
l
ooksucks.Inti
midat
ingasf uck.

Whyam Iogl
i
ngt
hiswoman?

“Youwerewonder
ful
MsSoml
otha.You’
l
lhearf
rom us.Hav
eagoodday
”shei
sreal
l
ytr
yingt
o
getr
idofmenow.

Shepract
icall
yshuff
lesmeoutofherof
fi
ce.Hercl
osepr
oxi
mit
ymakesmefeelal
it
tl
efuzzy
.
Herscentisheavenl
yandal
lwoman.Duh!Sheisawoman.Shewal
ksmeoutandcl
osesthe
doori
nmyf ace.

Ther
egoesmychanceofemployment.Iwal
koutofthatof
fi
cebaf
fl
edmorethananythi
ng.
Doesthatev
enqual
i
fyf
oraninter
view.St
uckupbit
ch.Sheneedsagooddi
cktoloosenherupa
bi
t.

Idr
ivehomef eel
i
ngdef
eated.I
tsst
il
lhoursbef
oreIhavetofetchtheki
ds.Ideci
deonanap.
OnceinmybedIcan'tseem toswi
tchoffmymi nd.I
tkeepsrepl
ayingt
heinterv
iew.Or
whatevert
hatwas.

DidIoffendhersomehow?Orj ustonelookatmeshehadalr
eadydeci
ded.Maybetheyhad
al
readyknewwhot heyneededtheyjustf
oll
owedpr
ocedur
e.AnywayIneedtoputi
tbehindme
andfindsomethingelse.

Event
ual
lyIf
allasleepbombardedbydreamsofasexyvixen.Shei
shaunti
ngme.Theal
arm
wakesmeupj ustbeforei
t’
sti
met ofet
chtheki
ds.If
reshenupandgo.Theybr
ight
enupmyday
asusual
withtheirchat
ter
.
Thef ol
lowi
ngday sIspendr
egi
ster
ingwit
hempl
oymentagenci
es.Idon’
tknowwhyIhadn’
t
thoughtofthatbefor
e.Thei
deaofmyownbusi
nessi
salsogrowinginmymi nd.I
tmi
ght
actuall
ybewhatget smeoutoft
hismess.

I
t’
saFridayafter
noonandIrecei
veacall
from t
heTOSi nfor
mi ngmethathei
sonhisway
.I’
m
wear
ingmybum shor t
sandanov ersi
zet
-shi
rt
.I’
m notchangingforhi
m.Hehasseenmyext
ra
bi
tsanddecidedhewantedsmaller
.

Thi
rt
yminut
eslat
erheisout
sidethegateandtheki
dslethi
minwi
thoutev
enaski
ngme.Hei
s
al
onethi
sti
me.Hefindsmeinthekit
chencleani
ngup.

“Hel
l
obaby
,”hecanbedel
usi
onal
att
imes.Theki
dsr
unof
ftogett
hei
rbags.

“
Tsi
etsi
.”

“Mhmh.Imi ssyourf
eist
iness,
”hesay
scagi
ngmei
nbyt
hesi
nk.Icanf
eel
hisbul
gei
nmyass.
Ij
ustwantt
ov omit
.

“Tsi
etsi
thi
sisi
nappr
opr
iat
e.Getof
fme.
”It
rynott
obel
oud.

“Youknow,
tradi
ti
onal
l
yyouar
est
il
lmywife.Ther
eisnodi
vor
cei
nourcul
tur
e.You’
l
lmi
sst
he
goodl
if
eIoff
eredyouandt
akemeback.
”

“Iwonderwhatwi
l
lMi
nkysayaboutt
his.Your
ememberherr
ight
?Theskanky
oul
eftmef
or.
”

“Idi
dn’
tleav
e,y
ouchasedmeout
.”

“Youlef
tthemomenty
ousl
eptwi
thher
.Idon’
tent
ert
aincheat
ers.
”Whyam Iev
enhav
ingt
his
conv
ersati
on?

Hesi
ghsandmov
esbackandt
henopenst
hef
ri
dge.Takesoutj
uiceandpour
sforhi
msel
f.I
havetheur
getotel
lhi
m of
faboutdr
inki
ngj
uicehedi
dn’
tpayf
or.Ir
est
rai
nmy
sel
f.Thehi
gh
roadcanbepai
nful
.

“Idepositedmoneyintoyouraccount
.Didyougetit
?”heasks.Ihaven’tcheckedandI
’
m qui
et
surpr
ised.Iwanttotel
lhi
mt ogot ohel
l.ThenIremembermyki ds.Hiskids.Weneedthe
money .Especi
all
ythem.

“No.Whati
sitf
or?
”

“Theki
dsmai
ntenance.I
’
m sor
ryLona.
”

“Thanks.”I
’
m notreadyforhi
sapology
.Itmakesmef eelbett
ertohatehim.Oncehe
apologi
sesthenhewill
beabsolvedofhisgui
l
t.Nah.Ican’tl
ethim of
fthehookyet
.Whyt
he
suddenchangeofheartanyway?Thisi
saTOS.Imustnev erforget
.

Thekidsar
ebackandr eadyt
ogo.Hegi
vest
hem t
hecarkey
sandt
heygi
vemequi
ckhugsas
theyr
unoff.Theyar
ereall
yexci
ted.

“Don’
tsell
thehouse.I
t’
sforyouandt
hekids.I
’
llpayforthemaintenanceofi
t.Thi
sist
helif
e
mykidsareusedtowherewill
youmovethem t
o.Idon’twantthem insomedingypl
aceLona.
Yousti
ll
haveanoptionoftaki
ngmebackyouknow.”Her eal
lydoest hi
nkhei
sgodsgiftto
women.

“HowcanItrustyoutokeepyourwordTsiet
siwheny
ou’vedonenothi
ngbutpr
ovehow
unt
rust
wor
thyy ouare.Youl
etyourki
dsstarv
eformonths.ForWhat
?”Iam f
umingr
ightnow.
Thi
smanthinkshecant oywi
thmyf eel
i
ngs.

“
Lewenamosadi ostubbor
n,”hesi
ghs.“Kegogopot
seLona.”Hedropshisv
oice.Il
i
teral
lyr
oll
myey
es.Iusedt
ot hi
nkhewassexywhenhespokeSet swana.Nowhejustgr
atesmyt i
ts.

“
Ican’
tgobackt
her
eTsi
etsi
.I’
m sor
ry.
”Whyam Iev
enapol
ogi
sing?

Hecomescl
oserandenvel
opesmei nahugt
hatIdon’
tret
urn.Ii
nhal
ehi
sfami
l
iarscent
.It
oncedr
ovemenuts.Now,Idet
esti
t.
“Iwon’
tgi
veuponus.
”Ipul
lbackf
rom hi
shug.

“Youal
readydid.Themomenty
oubr
okeourv
ows.Ther
eisnocomi
ngbackf
rom t
hat
.”Thi
s
manmustt hi
nkI’
m anidi
ot.

Helooksli
kehewant stosaysomethi
ngbutdeci
desagai
nsti
t.Hegrabshi
skeysf
rom t
he
ki
tchencounterandleaves.If
oll
owhi
m outt
owav emykidsgoodby
e.Iwatcht
hem ast
hey
di
sappearint
ot hedi
stance.

Igobacki
nsi
detheemptyhouset
ogetr
eadyf
ort
heev
eni
ng.Lal
ahasbeenr
emi
ndi
ngmet
he
whol
edayasifI
’
df or
get
.

Icheckmyphoneandt herei
sabanknot i
fi
cati
on.R50000deposi
tedi
ntomyaccount .What
’s
theTOSupt onow?Ireall
ydon’tt
rusthim whenhet hr
owshismoneyaround.Het
hinks
every
onecanbebought .Thi
sismoneyf orhiskidsnotme.Hemustn’
tthi
nkhecanbuymy
for
giveness.I’
m nott
hatnaivel
itt
legir
lanymor e.

I
t’
salmost8pm whenIdecidetogetreadyfortheevening.Whatdoesoneweartoahouse
par
ty?I
'm notr
eal
lysur
e.Iweardarkblueskinnyjeans,awhitevestandapowderbl
uebl
azer
.
Powderbl
ueheelsandsil
verchokerasanaccessor y.Ideci
deont hecur
lyweav
e.

ItakeanUbertothegi
venaddress.I
’m notabouttodrivetoaplacewher eImightdri
nk.The
partyi
sinaluxur
yapart
mentinMel r
oseAr ch.OncethereIcal
lLalatoletherknowI’m out
side.
Shegivesmeacodet ouseattheentranceandt hesecuri
tyguydir
ectsmet oal i
ftwhereImust
press5.

Thisi
sabeautif
ul bui
l
dingwithshadesofgreyandr edontheoutsi
de.Itscr
eamsmoney.Ther
e
i
sonlyafewdoor sont he5thfl
oorandIgotothel astoneasdir
ected.Ther
eisf
aintmusi
c
soundcomingthrough.Iknockandther
eisnor esponse.Ical
lLal
aagainandafewseconds
l
atersheopensformewi t
hthephonesti
ll
againstherearandasi l
l
ygr i
nonherf
ace.

“Hi
Choma.Wel
come”shei
sni
ceandt
ipsyIcant
ell
.

“
Hay
iboChomaar
eyout
hehost
ess?
”Shei
gnor
esmewhi
l
eleadi
ngust
hrought
hepl
ace.I
ts
amazingbyt heway .Spaci ous,wit
hof fwhitehighwal ls.Thef ur ni
turecompr isesofgol d, dark
brownandwhi tecol ours.Thenascat t
er i
ngofdi f
ferentcol ourst hroughoutther oom from t he
painti
ngsont hewal l
s,sidelampsst r
ategical
lyplacedandscat teredcushionsi nv ari
ous
compl ementi
ngcol ours.Onesideoft hewal li
sal l
glasssl idi
ngdoorwhi chopenst oabal cony
withenoughspacet oaccommodat emor ethant went ypeopl e.Thi siswheremostpeopl ear e.
Ani nt
eri
ordecor atordef i
nit
elyhadahandi nthis.Thisopenpl anl i
v i
ngroom ext endst oan
equall
ybeautifuldiningwhi chleadstot hekit
chen.Theki tcheni sgl or
ious.I
shassi lv
erand
deepr edcol
our s.Ther eisawi ndi
ngst air
casewhi chleadst ot hebedr oomsandbat hrooms.
Wedon’ tgoint here.Shepoi ntmet otheguest sbat hroom whi chi sont hisfl
oorandt heonewe
areexpectedtouse.Theupst air
sareai soffli
mi t
sshet ell
sme.Herphoner ingsandshewal ks
awayt oanswerl eav ingmet ofeastmyey eont hewal ldisplays.

Inoti
cethatther
eareafewpict
uresofAthi
indiff
erentsoccersquads.Isheaprofessional
foot
ball
er?Thatwouldexpl
aint
hecornergl
assdisplaywit
hallthetrophi
esandmedal s.AsI
l
ookcloselyIseehi
m AFCAjaxandFulham FC.Heist her
ealdealthenbutthesearefrom a
coupl
eofseasonsback.

Thereareaf ewpeopl einther oom thatIdon’ tevenrecognisebuttheyl ookmoney ed.Nooneis

real
lypayi
ngat tent
iont omeandt hatsui
tsmej ustfine.Iwalkaroundanddeci detogot othe
kit
chencount erwher etherei
sat emporarymi nibarsetupwi t
habar tendereven.Heiscute.He
asksmef ormypoi sonandIr equestacockt ail
.Itakemydr inkandwanderar ound.May beIcan
meetapot entialwhoknows.Quencht hethirstalitt
lebutmygamei swhack.Woul dn’
teven
knowhowt orespondt of l
i
rti
ng.Myv ocabularyisfullofmommyt alk.Howdoesonegetbackt o
thedati
ngscenemar a.Dopeopl eev endate?

Idon’tfeelli
kegoingtothebalconyyet.Eventuall
yIfindanunoccupi
edsett
eewit
hov ersi
zed
pil
lowsandenj oymydr ink.Themusicisn’tt
ool oud.Peopleareabl
etoenj
oythei
r
conversations.Iobser
v ethepeoplearoundmei nsi
lence.It
sfunnyt
owatchpeoplef
lir
t.The
fawningandexagger atedlaughstheydo.Thebat ti
ngofey el
ashesandswingi
ngthei
rhair.
NdisazoI ambake.

Af t
erawhileLal
acomesbackt of
etchmeandt akemet ot hebalcony.Athii
sther
eandaf ew
othermenwi tht
heirwomennextt othem.Ispotaf ewthatIr ecogni
sefrom tel
evi
sion.Acouple
ofsoccerplayer
swi t
hwomenwhoar en’tthei
rwi v
es.It'
snotmypl acetojudge.I
’m onl
yherefor
thef r
eeexpensi
vealcohol.I
’
m notsurewhatt heyar ecelebrati
onbuttheyseem tobe.Iwonder
i
fSazi wil
lbecoming.Lalasit
sonAthi’slap.Thisthingisser i
ous.It
akeanempt ychairnotfar
from them.

Af
tert
hei
ntr
oduct
ionst
hei
rconv
oresumesandIl
i
stenont
hesi
de-
li
ne.Ienj
oyt
hei
rbackand
f
ort
hbant
eri
ng.

Lalaseemstoocloset
oAt hi
formyli
kingandAthii
sadef
ini
ti
onofafuckboy.It
houghtshe
washappywi t
hherhusband.What
’sshedoinghangi
ngontoanot
herman’sarm.Si
tt
ingon
thei
rlapandshit
.

Ikeeptr
yingtogiveherpointedlooksbutshei sobli
vi
oust othem.WhywasIeveninvi
ted?
Clear
yshedidn’tneedme.I ’
m notcomplaining.It
’sanightoutwit
htheVI
P’sofoursociet
y.
Therear
ef i
ngerfoodsbeingserv edandIindulge.Aft
erawhi l
ethetwogobackinsi
dethe
house.I
’
ml eftsit
ti
ngwithpeopleIdon'tknow.

Whenpeopl estar
ttogroupthemselvesImov ebackinsi
de.I ’
minmyf our
thcockt
ailandIbadly
needtheloo.Thereisalongqueuewi ththedownst ai
rsbathroom.Igobacktotheliv
ingroom
andlookaround.Noonei sreal
l
ypay ingattent
ion.Iqui
cklyclimbthestai
rst
ogouset heone
upstai
rs.If
indfourdoorsandallareclosedasIwonderwhi chonecouldbethebathroom.I
star
topeningthefir
stdoornearesttome.

Righti
nthemi ddl
eofaki
ngsizebedLal
aisridingAthi
’
scockli
keherl
ifedependsoni
t.Ist
and
theref
rozen.Myquimtwi
tchesIwon'
tli
e.Phelathi
sisli
vepor
ndon’tj
udge.

Lalai
sobl
ivi
oustomypresenceasshehasherbackt
ome.Howev
erAt
hihasseenmeandi
t
seemstoexci
tehi
mthattheyhaveanaudi
ence.

Thatlookhehassnapsmei ntoacti
on.Iqui
ckl
yclosethedoorandruntheotherway
.Ist
il
lneed
topee.Ther oom Iopeni
sabedr oom equal
l
ybigast hepr
eviousone.Igoi
nandcheckforan
en-
suitebathroom.I’
m gr
atefult
ofindoneandIreli
evemyself.Af
termybusi
nessIgoback
downstair
s.

Iwon'tl
ie,I
’
m worr
iedaboutLal
a.Howdoesshefuckaper
sonshehardl
yknows.Shei
smar
ri
ed
forgoodnesssakes.Shoul
dn’
tIbetheonef
ucki
ngrandom peopl
e?

I
t’
shal
fanhourl
aterwhenagl
owi
ngLal
awal
ksdownt
hest
air
s.Shecomesandsi
tsnextt
ome.

“Icannotbel
i
evej
usty
oudi
dthat
.”Iwhi
spert
oherdi
sappr
ovi
ngl
y.
“
Itst
aysbet
weenusr
ight
!”t
hener
veoft
hiswoman.Whywoul
dIt
ell
herhusband?

“
I’
ll
pret
endy
oudi
dn’
tsayt
hat
.”

“I
’
mj ustsay
ing.Yourmarr
iagei
sbustmay
bey
ou’
dwantt
odot
hesamef
orme.
”What
madnessisthi
s?Ndiyal
i
ngwa.

“
Real
lyLala.Youhadt
otakei
tther
e.Youknowdowhat
every
oul
i
ke.Youar
eagr
ownass
woman.”

“Ohsomuchdr
amaLona,
li
veal
i
ttl
e.Hav
esomemor
eal
cohol
.”Sheget
supandwal
ksaway
.

“Ineedt
ogohome.Whati
sthecodet
ogetoutoft
hispl
ace.
”Iscr
eam af
terher
.

“Hayiphol
amanLona.”Sherespondsasshedi
sappearsoutt
hebalcony.Ineedtogo.I
’
m not
hav
ingfun.Lal
aisal
sopissi
ngmeof f
.MaybeI’
mjudgingfr
om theearl
ierdi
scover
y.

Iwalkoutonl
ytobet ur
nedbackbythesecuri
ty.Ineedanewcodetoleavethebuil
ding.Igo
backtotheapart
mentandLalablat
antl
yignor
esme.Igoandsear chforAthi
.Iknockont he
room If
oundthem shaggi
ngin.I
’
mr eal
l
yhopingIwon’ tf
indar
epeatofearli
erwithadiffer
ent
gir
l.

Ther
eisnoresponsetomyknock.Iopent
hedoort
ent
ati
vel
y.Noonei
nther
oom.Thebedi
s
messyyoucanclear
lyseet
hatf
unwashad.

Thebat
hroom doori
ssl
i
ght
lyaj
ar.Iwal
ktowar
dsi
tandhei
sint
her
e.

“Athisorrytobugyou.Ineedtoleavecanyouhelpwit
hthecode?”Hejumpsatt hesoundof
myv oice.Thi
ngsstar
tfall
ingover.Hecomesoutwithwhit
epowdersmear edont het
ipofhi
s
nose.Hesni f
fsandwipeshisnoseandhi seyesseem di
l
ated.Heisdefi
nit
elyhi
gh.

“Sor
ryaboutt
hat
.Youwantal
i
ne?
”heof
fer
sli
kei
t’
stea.
“Nothanks.Justt
hecodetol
eave.
”Hewalksoutandget
shi
sphone.Af
tergener
ati
ngt
hecode
hegi
vesittome.Ithankhi
m andwalkout
.

Ir
unintoLal
adownst
airs.I
’
m noti
mpr
essedwi
thher
.Ihopeshei
snotsnor
ti
ngt
hecokewi
th
At
hi.I
’v
eseenwhatdrugscandotoaf
amily
.

“
I’
mleav
ingLal
a.”

“Yousuchaki
l
ljoyChoma.Letmegety
out
hecode.
”

“Igotitalready .
”Iwalkawayrequest
inganUber .Byt het
imeIgetoutt heoutsidebui
ldingit’
s
alreadywaiting.It
’saft
ermidni
ghtwhenIar r
ivehome.Ther ei sacarparkedintheyard.It’
sthe
TOS.I ’
m angr y.Whatthefucki
shedoi nghere?Iregretnotchangingthelocks.Maybeit’sthe
kids.Istar
tt opanic.If
indatakeawaypaperbagont hekitchencounterwithabottl
eofmy
favouri
tewi nenextt oi
t.Heisnotherethough.Ifindhimint hebedroom underthebl
anket s.I
swi t
chont hel i
ghtandthatwakeshim up.

“Ot
swakaeatt
hist
imeLona?Whot
hef
ucki
she?
”heasksi
nasl
eepyv
oice.Di
dheget
amnesi
a?

“Tsi
etsiwhatt
hehel
lar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”heget
sof
ffr
om t
hebedwi
thonl
yhi
sboxershor
ts
andwalkstowar
dsme.

“Icameheret
osur
prisey
ouandIfi
ndyougone.Iwai
tedhoursfory
ou.Ar
eyouseei
ng
someoneel
se?
”Al
lthehai
rybi
tsonmybodyareit
chi
ngrightnow.

“Tsiet
sil
eav
ebefor
eIcal
lthepol
ice.
”Heisstandi
ngi
nf r
ontofme.I’
m notsur
eifhisoneabi
s
supposetot
urnmeon.Hepickshissweat
pantsfr
om t
hefloorandst
art
sgetti
ngdressed.

“I
fyouar
eseeingsomel
oser,I
’
llt
akemykids.Nomanwi
l
lrai
semyki
dsLona.Notwhi
l
eI’
m st
il
l
al
ive.
”MaybeIshoul
dar
rangeyourdeat
hthen.

“
Whowi
l
lrai
set
hem?Yourskank?Hey
i!GetoutofmyhouseTsi
etsi
maan.Ungandi
l
ingi
!
”
“
It
'smyhouse!
”her
oar
s.

Idi
alt
hepol
i
ce.I
’
llhav
ehi
sassar
rest
ed.Hedoesn'
tknowme.

Hepicksuphiswalletandphonefr
om thesi
detabl
eandleaves.Ihangupbeforei
tgoes
t
hrough.AftermakingsureheisgoneIgobackuptomyr oom.Changet hel
inenandgo
f
reshenup.Ican’
trelax.I
’
mt ooworkedup.I
t’
sdeci
ded.I
’
m selli
ngthishouseandmoving.
I
magineifIhadbroughtsomeonehomet ofi
ndtheTOSinmybed.

Thefol
lowi
ngmorni
ngIr
eceiv
eat extf
rom Lalaaski
ngmetoconf
ir
m herst
orywi
thBr
iant
hat
shespentt
heni
ghtatmyhouse.Idon’
tli
keitonebit
.Shei
sahoe.

Chapt
er3

“
Hav
inghal
l
uci
nat
ions

I
'
mlosi
ngsl
eepev
eryni
ght

Keept
ryi
ngt
ocov
ermyey
es

Myey
es,
yeah

I
sitmyi
magi
nat
ion?

It
hinkI
'
mlosi
ngmymi
nd

St
il
lseey
ourf
aceal
lthet
ime

Al
lthet
ime”
-DVSN

I
t’sMondaymor ningandI ’ml azingar oundinbedaf t
erdroppingthekidsatdaycar e.I’
mtryi
ng
toforgetmybotchedi nter
viewbutI ’mf ai
li
ng.Theladyhasbeenhaunt ingmet hewhole
weekend.Iwonderifshei smar r
ied.Shewor enor i
ng.Somepeopl edon’tweart hem soit
doesn’tmeananything.Ofteni t’smenwhodon’ tthough.Idoubtifsheismar r
iedorevenhavea
mansheseemswayt ooupt ightt ohaveone.Wi t
hmyl ackofactionImi ghtjustendupsourli
ke
her.Wellsheisn’
treallysourj ustaloof .I
fshehasamant henshewear st hepantsinthei
r
household.Whatifshei sadomi natr
ix.Hmm.Thatwoul dbei nt
eresti
ng.Suddenl yIhave
unbiddenimagesofherspanki ngme.
I
mpambanoi
qal
aso.

Ireall
yneedamanev enifi
t’
saBen10.Thi ngsaregett
ingoutofhandnow.Ev ent
uall
yIgetup
andshowert hengomakemy selfsomethi
ngtoeat.Justthenthedoorbell
rings.Igocheckand
fi
ndadel iv
er ymanbythegatewi t
hanenvelope.Idon’
topenthegate.Igettheenv el
ope
throughthepostboxandhegi vesmet hecli
pboardtosignoverthegat
ewhi lehewaitsout
side.
Youcannev erbetoocar
efulwit
hsomanycr i
minalsar
ound.

Igetbacktothehouseandopentheenv
elope.I
t’
sweirdbecausei
t’
snotaddr
essedt
omebut
theTOS.It
’ssummonsagainstt
hehouse.Apparent
lyt
hehouseisinar
rear
s.How?It
houghthe
paidcashforal
lhi
sproper
ti
es.

Whydiditgett
oapointwheret
herear
esummonsissuedany
way ?Ideci
detoswal l
owmypr
ide
andcal
lhim.Hedoesn’
tanswer
.Ical
lhi
m acoupl
eofti
messtil
lnoresponse.Ideci
det
ocal
l
thenumberspr
ovi
dedonthedocument.

WhenIf i
nishwit
ht hatcallIf
eelli
kecur l
i
ngintoaballanddie.Thatnogoodsonofabit
ch
deci
dedtost opt
hef inalpaymentsoft hehouse.Hekeptignori
ngthebankcall
sasheisthe
oneli
stedonallthedocument s.Ineededtosettl
eR147000wi t
hin10daysorf
urt
herl
egal
acti
onwoul dbetaken.Apparentlythehousewasal r
eadyont heprocesst
obeaucti
oned.

HowcouldTsietsidothi
stome?Didhereall
yhatemet hatmuchtowantt
oseemeandhi
skids
homel
ess.Ihatethathisl
awyer
shandl
edt hedi
vorce.Hereal
l
ypull
edanumberonmeandI
wasnai
veenought ot
hinkt
heywoul
dbef air
.Weliveandlearn.

Iabandont hecookingidea.Il
ostmyappet i
te.Ideci
detochecktheinter
netonmyphonef ora
fewschoolst hatoff
erthebeautycourse.Al
ltheschoolsIfi
ndaroundJohannesbur
gareabi t
pri
cey.Ican’treal
lyaff
orditbutIknowIneedt odosomet hi
ng.I
fIcan’tgetaj
obthenatleast
l
etmehav emyownbusi ness.Ifeari
fnothi
ngcomest hroughwemi ghtenduphomeless.

Ir
ecei
veacal
lfr
om Lal
aasI
’
m busysur
fi
ngt
henetf
orot
herj
obs.

“Lazol
a.”I
’
m noti
nthemood.

“Choma.Hauwhat
’swr
ong?
”Shedoesn'
tknow.
“Lazol
a,Idon’
twantt
obeinv
olv
edi
nwhatev
eri
tist
hati
sgoi
ngonbet
weeny
ouandBr
ian.
Leavemynameoutofit.
”

“Ohcal
m downLona.Imadeamist
akenotki
l
lsomeone.Itwon’
thappenagai
n.I’
m sor
ryIput
youi
nthemiddl
eofmymess.It
houghtwewerefr
iendsandfri
endsl
ookoutforeachother
.”

“Thereislookingoutforyouandt
hent her
eismisl
eadi
ngyou.I
fIhav
etobehonestwi
thyou,
yourbehaviouristacky
.Youaredi
srespect
ingy
ourhusbandandwhatdoy
outhi
nkaboAthiand
hisfr
iendswillthi
nkofhim?”

“Idon’
texpectyoutounder
standLona.Iam def
ini
tel
ynott
aki
ngmar
ri
ageadv
icef
rom
someonewhof ail
edtokeepherman.”

“That
’sbel
owt
hebel
tandy
ouknowi
t.Doy
ouboo.Don’
tsayIdi
dn’
twar
nyou.
”

“I’
m sor
ryLona.I
’
mjustst
ressed.Idi
dn’
tmeant
hat
.Any
wayIcal
l
edt
osayt
hanksf
ort
hecov
er
up.”

“Sharp.
”Ihungup.Didn’
tneedtotel
lhert
hatBri
annev ercal
l
ed.Shet
hinksBri
andoesn'tknow.
Cheati
ngpeopleal
way sthi
nktheyar
east epahead.ThewayIhatecheater
s.Ican’
tev
en
condoneitwi
thmyf r
iend.

Anot
hercal
lcomest
hroughandi
t’
stheTOS.Hedef
ini
tel
ytookhi
sti
met
oret
urnt
hecal
l
.

“Howcany
ounotf
ini
sht
hehousepay
ment
s?”Idon’
tev
enhav
eti
met
ogr
eet
.I’
m boi
l
ingont
he
i
nsi
de.

“Oh.Sothatwasyourreasonf
ort
hemanycal
l
s.Iact
ual
l
ythoughty
ouhadr
econsi
der
edy
our
st
upiddeci
sion.
”Hedrawls

“Whenareyougoingt
ogeti
tthr
oughyourthi
ckskul
lTsi
etsi?Idon’
twanty
ou.Iwi
l
lnev
erget
backwi
thyou,ev
er!Ev
eni
fyouwerether
elastmanonear th.”
“Keatl
hal
oganya,y
ousti
llt
hinkyouhaveachoice,”hechuckl
es.Youdon’thaveachoice
sweet
hear
t.Iwi
llmakeyourli
femiser
able.Don’
tyoumi ssthef
inert
hingsinli
fe?Nothavi
ngt
o
worr
ywhereyournextmealwil
lcomefrom? ”Maybehei sbi
pol
ar.

“Ndi
mamel
i
sisekendoda!I
'
drat
herdi
e.”Idr
opt
hecal
lthent
akedeepbr
eat
hs.He’
l
lbet
he
deat
hofmethi
sone.

I
t’
salmostti
met ofet
chthekidsandIgo.Khot
hatsohasbeenmoodysincecomingbackfr
om
herf
ather
.Nthat
isi
isupdati
ngmeal l
aboutherdaywhil
ehersi
sterl
ooksoutthewindow.

“
Whowant
sicecr
eam?
”Iask.Br
iber
ywor
kswi
thmyki
ds.

“Mememommy
!”Nt
hat
iexcl
aims.Nor
eact
ionf
rom Khot
hat
so.

“Baby
,youdon’
twanticecream?”Iaskher
.Sheonlyshr
ugshershoul
der
s.Idr
ivet
o
McDonal
d'
sandpark.Ineedaf ewmomentswithherbef
oregoi
nghome.

Aft
erweplaceourorderwegositoutsi
debytheri
deswhereIcaneasi
lywatchNthat
isi
play
ing.
Khothat
soisnotev
eni nt
erest
edi
nrides.NowIknowforsuresomethi
ngisseri
ousl
ywrong.

“Babydidsomet
hinghappenatschool?
”Sheshakesherhead.Thi
sisgoingtobedi
ffi
cul
t.“At
yourf
ather
’s?
”noreact
ion.Myhearti
sinmythroatri
ghtnow.“Youknowy oucant
alktome
ri
ghtbaby?
”Isof
tenmyv oiceandt
rytobeasnon-thr
eateni
ngaspossi
ble.

Wehav
ethei
cecr
eam i
nsi
l
encewhi
l
ewat
chi
ngNt
hat
isi
.

“Daddysay swear
egoi
ngtogoliv
ewi
thhi
m.Don’
tyouwantusany
mor
emommy
?”Thi
xol
enj
a
yendoda!Icoul
dki
l
lhi
mrightnow.

“
Yourf
athert
oldy
out
hat
?”Shenods.
“Baby
,I’
m notsurewhatyourf
athermeantbutI’
m neverl
eavi
ngyouwi
thanyone.Il
ovey
ou.
Youaremyl i
febothyouandyoursist
erandyou’
llal
waysstaywi
thme.
”

“
Youpr
omi
se?
”Sheper
ksup.

“YeahIpr
omi
se.
”

“Maybeweshouldgobacktohim.Hi
sfri
dgei
sal
way
sful
lofni
cet
hingsandhi
shousehas
fur
nit
ure.
”NankokeumntwanakaTsi
etsi
.

“Baby
,mommyanddaddyar enotget
ti
ngbacktogether.Heissti
ll
yourf
atherandhelovesy
ou,
”
IhopeIdon’
tgetst
ruckbyli
ghtni
ng“Youcanalwaysvisithi
m butmeandhim areovermybaby
.
Mommywi l
lwor
kextrahar
dt omakesurethaty
ouhav enicethi
ngs.”

“Hesaysyoudon’thavetoworkextr
ahard.Hesay
shecangi
veusnicethi
ngs.”Whathashe
beentel
li
ngmychi l
dren?I
’mtemptedtobadmouthhi
mtothem.Thehighroadisdi
ffi
cul
t
i
ndeed.I
’l
ltakei
tfornow.

“I’
m surehecanbabybutuswomenneedtodot hi
ngsonourownsomet
imes.Mamaisoneof
thosewomen.Likeoneofthepower
puf
fsgir
ls.Remembertheyar
eal
wayssavi
ngpeopl
e?”
desperatet
imes.

“
Ohy
esmommy
.Iwantt
obeapower
puf
fgi
rl
.”

“
YouseeIal
sowantt
obeone.I
fIl
etdaddydoev
ery
thi
ngt
henIcan’
tbeone.
”

“
Youar
eri
ghtmommy
.I’
m goi
ngt
ohel
pyou.
”

“
HowwasauntyMinky?
”Ihavetoask.Sheshrugshershoul
ders.That’
sall
Iget.Wef
ini
shour
i
cecr
eam andgetNt
hati
sif
rom t
herides.Shehasi
cecr eam al
loverhercl
othes.

OncewearehomeIputthem i
nthebat
handgoprepar
efordi
nner
.I’
m sti
l
lgr
ippedbyfearof
l
osingt
hehouse.Ij
ustf
eell
i
kethewall
sar
eclosi
nginonmeandsomet hi
nghastogiv
e.
It
sthefol
l
owi ngday.I
’
m busyr egi
steri
ngwithempl oymentagenciesagain.I
’m notsurehow
manyofthoseI’mregi
steredon.Thewhol einternethasmyCVI ’m sur
e.Isthatevensafe?The
amountofjobsaler
tsIreceiv
eonmyphoneandi t
’sneverwhatIchose.I’
mr eal
lyexhaust
ed
andIneedtogetoutoft hi
shouse.Itsuddenlyfeelsli
kemypr i
sonwher eIawaitmyexecution.I
deci
detogot othemall
.May bebeingaroundpeopl ewi l
ll
if
tmyspi r
it
.

Idri
vetoMallofAf
ri
ca.Nothi
ngisworsethancomi
ngtoamal lwheny
ouar
ebr
oke.Ireal
i
se
thatIhav
en’
tbeenshoppingf
ormy sel
fsi
ncemydivor
ce.Ionl
ycameoncef
ort
hekidsandthat
wasbecauseofthechangeofseason.

Theirfatherbroughtthem backwithl
otsofnewclothesonSunday .Theycoul
dn’
tstoptalki
ng
aboutit.I’
mf ort
unatethatIusedtobuyexpensiv
equalit
yclot
hesandt heyhavelastedl
onger
plusIhadmor eclot
hest hanwasnecessary
.Iwon'tevenmentionbagsandshoes.WasIa
shall
owbei ng?ImeanIcoul daff
ordt
o.Iwondersomet imesiftheuniver
seistr
yingtoteach
meal esson.Hel lI
’m enoughletmegraduate.

Iwalkar
oundthemalldoi
ngwindowshoppi
ng.Thewor
stt
hingonecansubj
ectt
hemsel
vest
o.
I’
m asuckerf
orpuni
shment.

It
’stwohourslater
.I’
mtir
edandI’m hungr
y.IgoseatatSpurandorderatoastedsandwi
ch
withalat
te.Isuddenl
yfeelgui
l
tyt
hatI’
m eati
ngatSpurwithoutmykids.Isquashi
tdownas
soonasitpopsup.Theyar eal
soeat
ingatcrèche.

Assoonasmyor derarr
ivesIstar
teati
ng.Whatawast eofmymoneyt houghthesandwi chi
s
kak.I
twast hecheapestthi
ngont hemenu.It
’sdrierthanitshouldbeconsi deri
ngit
’satoasted
sandwich.Ithastheseblackcrumbsoni tasi
ftheydidn’tcl
eant hetoasterbeforepr
eparing
mine.I
nf actIdon’tthi
nkthetoast
erhasbeencleanedsi ncetheystartedoperati
ng.Ilosemy
appeti
teimmedi atel
yandpusht heplat
eaway.I’
llsett
leformyl att
e.

“Notenj
oyi
ngy ourf
ood?
”Myi
nsi
dest
urncol
dandmyt
ummydanceswhi
l
emyqui
m cl
enches.
Idi
dsay.I
’m ahoe.

“I
t’
snotupt
omyexpect
ati
ons,
”IsayasIl
ookupathi
sgor
geousf
ace.

“
DoyoumindifIj
oiny
ou?
”heasks.Hei
scar
ryi
ngaf
ewdesi
gnerbags.Thet
woar
efr
om a
women’
sshop.

“
Notatal
l.
”Heputst
hebagsontheseatandsl
i
deinopposi
teme.ForamomentIthoughthe
woul
dfi
twithhi
shei
ght
.Ther
eisafewsecondsofawkwardsi
l
ence.I
’m ev
enf
eel
ingshy
dr
inki
ngmyl
att
e.Il
ookatt
hechar
coal
sandwi
chandcr
ingeasi
fImadei
tmy
sel
f.

WhenIl ookup,If
indhi
mlookingatmewi thhi
sbrowfur
rowed.Helikesdoingthatandit
unset
tlesme.JustasI’
m stewinginmythoughtsmywai
tresscomes.I’
velostmywi l
lto
complain.Hi
sscentdoesthethingsandIf
eelli
kecr
awli
ngupt ohi
m andbur yi
ngmyheadi nhi
s
chest
.Isitassoli
dasitl
ooks?Iwonder.

“Goodaft
ernoonsi
r.MayIt
akeyouror
der
?”Shei
sext
rapol
i
te.Idon’
tbl
ameherIwoul
dbe
doingt
hesame.Wear ebot
hhoes.

“Fi
rstofal
ltel
lmesomethi
ng,
”heasksinhisdeepcommandingt
one.Sheper
ksup.Iwoul
dtoi
f
hewasaddr essi
ngme.I
’
dalsobenervousashell
.Butugi
rli
sobl
ivi
ous.

“Yes.
”Shegushes.

“
Woul
dyoueatt
hissandwi
ch?
”Hepoi
ntsatgr
annysandwi
ch.Shel
ooksati
tandf
rowns.

“
NoIwoul
dn’
t.
”

“
Thenhowdi
ditgetoutoft
heki
tchenandser
vedt
oacust
omer
?”

Mut
e

“I
nfut
ure,pl
easedon'
tservesomethi
ngthatyouwoul
dn’
tli
kebei
ngservedtoy
ousi
si.
”She
nodsherheadli
keanidi
ot.Heissopoli
teandyetI
’
mt er
ri
fi
edonherbehalf
.

“Thatwi
l
lbeal
l
.Thanky
ou.
”Justl
i
ket
hatshei
sdi
smi
ssed.Shecl
ear
sthet
abl
eandwal
ks
away.

“
Ohwel
l
,thatwentwel
l
.”That
’sal
lIcansay
.

“
Icoul
dseeyouweren’
tgoingt
osayanythi
ngabouti
t.Somet
imestheyneedt
obetol
dsothat
t
heycancor
rectt
hemselv
es.It
’sj
ustt
hatpeopl
egoaboutitt
hewrongwayandbecomer
udeto
t
heser
ver
s.”Of
fcour
set
heydo.Theypai
dfort
heser
vice.

“Youar
eri
ght
.”

“Howar eyouLona? ”heseemsgenuinel

yint
erestedinmywel l
being.Iwonderi
fheisa
psychol
ogist.Hecangetinsi
deaperson’
smi ndthisone.Iwanttotel
lhimthatI
’
m aboutt
okil
l
myex.OhImi ghtbehomelesssoon.Howaboutt hi
sone.Iwastedmymoneyandmygui l
tona
crapsandwich.

“
I’
m good,
howar
eyouSazi
?”

“
I’
m good.
”

“
Shoppi
ngi
nthemi
ddl
eoft
heday
.Yourl
i
fei
sgood.
”Isay
.Hegi
vesmeasmal
lsmi
l
e.

“
WellIwasbuyi
ngagi
ftf
orsomeonethenittur
nedint
oshoppi
ng.Idon’
tgetenought i
metodo
i
tsowhenIfi
ndanoppor
tuni
tyt
oshop,Itakeit
.”Hemustbeshoppingf
orthewife.Lucky
woman.

“
Woul
dyoul
iket
ogosomewher
eel
seandhav
epr
operl
unch?
”hecont
inues.Whywoul
dIwant
t
ogoany
wherewit
hyou?

“
Nothanks.I
’
mf i
ne.Thelat
tewil
lholdmeov erunt
ilIgethome.”Myt
ummychosesthat
momenttogrumbl
e.Icanfeel
myf aceheatupasher aiseshi
soneeyebr
ow.CanIdi
eal
ready
!

“Excusememam.Myser vert
oldmeaboutt heunfor
tunat
econdit
ionofyourmeal
.Iwoul
dli
ke
toapologi
seandaskifwecouldmakey ouanotherone.
”Hisnamet agi
swr i
tt
enmanager
.I
wonderhaditnotbeenforMrGorgeousherewouldhehav ebeenbother
ed.

“
Wear esort
edmyman.Thanky
ouforhandli
ngitt
hough.
”Sazi
qui
ckl
yresponds.The
managersgi
vesmet
helat
teonthehouseandleav
esus.
“Comewi
thme.
”Hecommands.Yeshecommands.Sazi
doesn’
task.

Igetupandfol
l
owhim.Don’taskmewhy
?Wewal ki
nsi
l
encet
owar
dst
hepar
kingar
ea.My
speechr
etur
nswhenIreal
i
sewhereweareheadi
ng.

“Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
”

“Ijustneedtoputthesei
nthecarandthenI'
m buy
ingy
oulunch.Youdon’tminddoy
ou?”NoI
don’t.Aslongashedoesn'
texpectany
thingmoret
hanaconversati
on.I
’mfi
ne.Wegett
ohis
carandhel oadst
heshoppingbagsinhisboott
henwegobacki nsi
dethemall.

“Howisthecarbyt
heway?
”Heasksaswegetont
heescal
ator
s.Hei
sri
ghtbehi
ndmeandI
can’
thel
pbutbeconsci
ousofmyass.

“
It
’sasgoodasnew.Thankst
oyou.
”

“
Itwasnot
hing.
”May
bet
oyou.

“
Itwasal
ott
ome.
”

“
Youar
ewel
come.
”

Wet hencontinuewalkinginsilence.Hedoesn' tsaymucht hisoneandIhav etheur getof i

lli
n
thesil
ence.That’
swhatIdowhenI ’
m ner vousorfeel
ingawkwar d.Hedoesn’ tseem affectedby
i
t.It
’smor el
ikeheprefer sthesil
ence.Thewayhewal ksthoughheexudesconf idence.Hei sa
manwhoknowswhohei sandi sunapol ogeti
caboutit.If
eelli
kepr ai
singhim byhisclan
namesj ustf
orbeinginhi scompany .Iseet hel
ookswegetf rom thepeopl eespeciall
ywomen.
Theyseem toenv ybeingi nmyposi tion.Someev enhav eaquest i
oninglookont heirf
acesl i
ke
whywoul dhebewal kingwi thtell
ytubbyandnott hem.Heseemsobl i
vi
oustoal lt
heat tenti
on
ormay behei susedtot heattenti
on.

HeleadsmetoKr
eam andwear egr
eet
edbythemanagerassoonaswewal
kin.Theplaceis
qui
etcompar
edtowhatitbecomesi
ntheev
enings.Weareseat
edi
nanicet
abl
ebyt hecorner
.
Heev
enpul
l
sachai
rforme.Chi
val
ryi
sst
il
lal
i
ve.

Themomentwesi tthemangerbr
ingsusthemenuandweor dert
hestar
ter
sfi
rst.Heor
der
s
theporkbel
l
ystar
terwhil
eIgoforcreamybut
ter
nutsoup.I
nt hemeanti
meIorderagl
assof
waterandhedoesthesame.

Oncet hemanagerleaveshepicksupthemenuandst udiesitlikei

t’
satextbook.Hisbrows
fur
rowsandIguesshedoest hatalotwhenheisconcent rat
ing.Hisski
nisflawless.Heissti
ll
sporti
ngthe5o'cl
ockshadow.Iguesst
hat’
shislook.I
tlooksr eall
ysexyonhim.Iwonderi fit
s
softespeci
all
ybetweenthethi
ghs.Myway wardthoughtsagai n.Ir
eal
lyneedtof i
lt
ermybr ai
n.

“
It
’sr
udet
ost
are.
”Shi
t!Isnapoutofmydaydr
eam t
ofi
ndhi
m wi
thamusementshowi
ngonhi
s
f
ace.

“Iwasn'
tstar
ing.
”Hemust
n’tt
hinkhei
sal
lthat
.Thent
her
ingr
eel
smeback.Thi
sissomeone
husband.

“Whatwi
l
lyouhav
e?”heasks.

“Alambshankwit
hasidev
eggie.
”Henodsandcl
osest
hemenu.Iact
ual
l
ywantev
ery
thi
ngon
themenubutIwon'
tbeapigi
nf r
ontofhi
m.

“
SowhoareyouSazi
?”Thi
sjustcomesoutwi
thouteventhi
nki
ngabout
.Icoul
dshootmy
mout
hri
ghtnow.Hesit
sbackwithhi
shandsr
estingoninthet
abl
e.

“
I’
m Sazi
Khumalo,
Ithoughty
ouknewt
hat
.Atl
eastt
hef
ir
stname.speci
fi
c.Whatdoy
ouwant
t
oknowLona?”

“
Arey
oumar
ri
ed.
”Her
aiseshi
slef
thandandshowsmehi
sri
ng.“
Wel
l
?”

“
Wel
lwhat
?”hehwadl
alangam umnt
u.

“
It
’sasi
mpl
equest
ionSazi
.Ar
eyouorar
eyounot
?”
“
Whati
fIam?
”Thi
sist
ir
ing.

“
Thenwhat
'st
his.
”Imakeasweepi
nggest
urebet
weenus.

“
Thi
s,
”Her et
urnst
hegest
ure,
“Ist
wopeopl
ehav
ingl
unch.Ori
sther
emor
e?”Ther
e’si
smor
ein
mydreams.

“
No.
”Igi
vehi
m af
akesmi
l
e.Imakeament
alnot
etoGoogl
ehi
sass.

“Youthi
nktoomuchLona.Don’tovert
hink.I’
m hungr
y,y
ouarehungr
yandgoodcompany.
”
Reall
ywehardl
yhav eanyt
hingtot
alkabout.Howam Igoodcompany?Heneedsabet
terl
ine.
“Andtoansweryourquest
ion,y
esIam mar r
ied.
”

“
Oh.
”Idon'
tknowwhyI
’
m di
sappoi
ntedbutIam.

“
Andy
ouLona,
arey
oumar
ri
ed?
”Thewayhesay
smynamegi
vesmebut
ter
fl
ies.

“
Div
orced.
”Idon’
tev
ent
hinkabouti
t.Hi
sbr
owf
urr
owsagai
n.

“
Hewasaf
ool
tol
ety
ougo.
”

“Iwantedtobeletgo.
”Hedoesn'taskanythi
ngfur
therandourst
art
ersar
riv
e.Heasksabout
whereI’mfrom andIenduptel
li
nghim aboutmychil
dhoodandwhereIgrewup.It
’snot
hing
personalj
ustthi
ngsIusedtogetuptoasachi l
d.Hedoesn’
tsaymuch.Aquesti
onandal augh
hereandtherethat
’sal
lhedoes.

Af
tert
hestar
ter
sweorderourmaincourse.Heorder
sthelambshankformeandsi
xKi
ng
Pr
awnsforhi
mselfwi
thasidesal
ad,vegandchipsforbot
hofustoshare.

“
Woul
dyoul
i
keagl
assofwi
newi
thy
ourmeal
?”
“
I’
m dr
ivi
ngandIst
il
lhav
etof
etchmyki
dsf
rom daycar
e.”

“
Ver
yresponsi
bleofy
ou.Icommendt
hat
.”I
’
m notdoi
ngi
tforaccol
adesi
tcomesnat
ural
l
y.

“Thankyou.Doyouhav
eki
ds?
”Icr
inger
ightaf
tert
hosewor
ds.Youhav
etobesensi
ti
vewi
th
suchquesti
ons.

“No.”That
’sall
hesay s.Byhi
sbodyl anguageIknowthat’
sallI
’
m getti
ng.Ist
artf
il
li
nginthe
spacewithmeaninglesschatt
er.Isoundli
kemyki dsr
ightnow.Ibabbl
eaboutdif
ferentt
hings.
Heseemsi nter
ested.InthemiddleofourlunchIr
ecei
veacallandexcusemy sel
ftoanswer.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“Gooddaymam.Youarespeaki
ngt oFi
siweGuptafr
om Ri
char
dsInc.I
’
m cal
li
ngtoi
nformyou
aboutt
hefol
l
ow-upint
erv
iewscheduledfort
hiscomi
ngFri
dayat11am.Wil
lyoubeablet
o
makeit?
”Myhearti
sgall
opi
ngrightnow.

“
Yes.Of
fcour
se.
”Ican’
tcont
ainmyexci
tement
.

“
Thanky
oumam.Seey
ouonFr
idayt
hen.Hav
eagr
eatday
.”

“
Thanky
ou.
”Ihangupandcl
utcht
hephonet
omychest
.

“
Goodnews?
”ForamomentIhadf
orgot
tenabouthi
m.Justamoment
.

“
Sor
tof
.Fol
l
owupi
nter
view.
”

“
That
’sgr
eatI
’
m sur
eyou’
l
ldowel
l
.”
“
Event
hiscal
li
sami
racl
e.Idi
dn’
tthi
nkt
heywoul
dcal
lback.
”

“
Youmusthav
eimpr
essedt
hem.
”Idon’
tthi
nksobuty
ounev
erknowwhatt
heempl
oyerwant
s.

Heasksfur
therquest
ionsaboutwhatIappli
edforandallt
hat
.Ist
artwi
thmychatt
eri
ng.We
f
ini
shwitht
hemai ncourseandorderdesert
.Hehasasenseofhumourthi
sone.I’
vebeen
l
aughi
ngforhours.Hejusthasawayofmaki ngmelaugh.Someti
mesIhavetothi
nkabout
whathesaysandthenwhenIgetitIburstoutl
aughing.

I
’
vel
ostt
rackoft
ime.I
t’
sal
mostf
ouri
ntheaf
ter
noon.Ihav
en’
thadt
hismuchf
uni
nages.

“
Ihav
etogoandf
etchmyki
dsf
rom day
-car
e.”

“
Okl
etmeset
tl
ethebi
l
landt
henI
’
llwal
kyouout
.”

Hedoesj
ustthat.Hewal
ksmeal
lthewayt
omycarev
engoest
oanext
entofi
nsi
sti
ngt
opay
f
ormyparki
ngt i
cket
.

“I
twasl ov
elyseei
ngy
ouagai
nLona.Thanksf
ort
hel
ovel
ycompany
.”Wear
est
andi
ngbyt
he
passengerdoor.

“Thanky ouf orlunchandf orthecompanyaswel l

.”Hi seyesar ei
ntentl
ylooki
ngatme.Hei stoo
close.Hisbr eathisf anni
ngmyf aceeven.Ijustneedt opullhim downal it
tl
eandsmashmyl i
ps
onhi s.Itur
nar oundandunl ockmycari nstead.Hesnakeshi shandbehi ndmetoopent hedoor
forme.If eel hi
m ev erywher
e.Hisclosenessdoest hingstomybody .Ihavemybackt ohim and
Ifeelwar m allover.Heopenst hedoorandhol dsit.Ishakeof fmyway war dt
hought
sandgeti n
thecar .Thenhecl osest hedoor.

Hest
andsbackwi
thhandsi
nhi
spocket
sandwat
chasIst
artt
hecar
.Ir
oll
downt
hewi
ndow.

“
Thanky
ouSazi
.”Hehasnoi
deahowhi
scompanycheer
edmeup.
“
Apl
easur
eLona.
”Thatwor
dal
oneconj
uresupf
orbi
ddeni
mages.

Idri
veoffleavinghi m standi
ngthereinonepl ace.Hestandsunti
lIexi
ttheparking.Mystars!
Thismani sthedef i
nit
ionoftemptation.Ineedtostayawayfrom him other
wiseI’
llbeahome
wreckerandar apist
.Themanhasn’ tevenmadeanyi nappropri
atemov esandyetI’mreadyto
dropmypant iesf orhim.Hoet endencies.

Igostr
aighttocr
èchetofet
cht
hekids.Thetr
aff
icishor
rendous.WhyIchoseMallofAf
ri
ca
whenthereisBedfor
dCentr
eevenEastgat
eMallbeat
sme.I nfai
rnessIshoul
dhav
ebeenlong
backbythen.

Event
ual
l
yIgett
othecr
ècheandpi
ckupt
heki
ds.Theyar
eal
way
shappyt
oseemeandt
hat
warmsmyheart
.

“
Mommy
,whyar
eyoul
ate?
”Khot
hat
soasks.Idi
dn’
tknowsheknewt
het
imeandt
hedi
ff
erence.

“Ihadameetingbaby.”Meeti
ngwit
hahunkt
hatIwoul
dliket
oexchangesal
i
vaandother
l
iquidswit
h.Barf
ortwot hi
ngsonehei
smarr
iedandsecondl
yheisnoti
ntomethatway.“
How
doy ouknowIwaslate?”

“Because,
youf
etchedusalongt
imeaft
ertheyfet
chedJonat
han.Ial
way
sleav
ebef
orehi
m.”
Outofallt
heki
dsaJonathanmustbenoti
ced.

“
Whoi
sJonat
han?
”

“Herboyfr
iend.
”Nt
hat
isi
pit
chesi
n.Howol
dist
hischi
l
d?Shoul
dsheev
enknowwhata
boyfr
iendis?

“
Shehasaboy
fri
end?
”

“
Yesmommy
.Ial
sohav
emanyboy
fri
ends.
”Shei
sahoe.
“
Nthat
isi
!youki
dsar
etooy
oungt
ohav
eboy
fri
ends.
”

“
Shoul
dwebef
ri
endswi
thgi
rl
sonl
y.Gi
rl
sar
emean.
”Khot
hat
soadds.

“
Youcanbef
ri
endswi
thboy
stoobaby
.

Not
hingwr
ongwi
tht
hat
.”Unt
ilt
heyst
artgoi
ngf
ory
ourpant
iesof
fcour
se.

“
Whatdoy
ouki
dsf
eel
li
keeat
ing?
”

“McDonal
d'
s!
”theybot
hex cl
aim.I
’mtoofull
tocookandIal
soneedtoassuagemygui
l
t.We
dri
vepassMcDsandIorderhappymealsforthem.I
t’
sal
most6pm whenwegethome.

Oncetheki
dsf i
nishwit
hthei
rsupperIgiv
et hem abathandsendt hem tobed.Thatl eavesme
withpl
ent
yoftimet opl
ay.I
’m notev
enwat chingT.
V.tonightIneedtoreli
eveanitch.IwishI
hadafoam baththenIwouldrunmyselfabubblebath.Ishowerandgounderbl ankets.Idon’
t
evenneedpornforthi
ssessionmymi ndi
sal r
eadyworkedup.

AsIliether eIclosemyey esandconj ureupi magesofhi m naked.Hel ooksgoodinmy

i
magi nation.Rippedinal ltheri
ghtplaces.Ist ar ttoplaywi t
hmy self.Idon’twanttorusht hi
s.I
wantt osav ourit.I
t’
sthecl osestthi
ngI’m goi ngt ohav etosexf orawhi l
e.Iplaywit
hmyni pples
ali
ttl
ebi t.Theyar esti
llassensiti
veast heywer ebefor eIhadki ds.AsIcont inuetoplayitfeels
sl
ipperybet weenmyl egs.WhenIseehi m hov eringabov emewi t
hhi sey esl
adenwithneed.I
openmyl egsf orhimt olethimin.Oh.Thef eel ofhi m ashepenet ratesme.Myf i
ngerisalready
pl
ayingwi t
hmynubasIsepar at
emywetf olds.I ’
m sowet ,
I’m over f
lowing.I’
m notgoingt olast
l
ong.I’mt r
yingtoprolongi tbuthisi
magesar esopower fulandv iv
idi nmyheadt hattheysend
meov ert heedge.I t
’sthemosti ntenseorgasm I ’
veev erexperi
enced.Mybodyi shummi ngwi t
h
pl
easur e.Icurlintoabal landfall
intoadr eaml esssleep.

Seey
ouFr
iday

Chapt
er4

“
You'
vebeenscar
edofl
oveandwhati
tdi
dtoy
ou

Youdon'
thav
etor
un,
Iknowwhaty
ou'
vebeent
hrough
Justasi
mpl
etouchandi
tcansety
ouf
ree

Wedon'
thav
etor
ushwheny
ou'
real
onewi
thme

If
eel
itcomi
ng,
Ifeel
itcomi
ng,
babe

If
eel
itcomi
ng,
Ifeel
itcomi
ng,
babe(
Iknowwhaty
ouf
eel
rightnow)
”-TheWeekend

I
taFr idayandI’
m strugglingwithmyoutfitoncemor e.Idon’twantt
ocomeof fassomeone
tacky.Ineedtodresslikeapr ofessi
onal
.Thepr obl
em isthatwithmycurvesev er
ythingIwear
putsalltheassetsondi splay
.Icouldbewear ingasack, myassandhipswi l
lbepoppi ngand
i
tst hesamewi ththeboobs.I t’
sahotdayi nJanuary.Idon'twanttobesweatinglikeaidi
ot.

If
inal
lydecideonadarknavyhi
ghwaistski
rtwit
hanoffwhit
eblousewit
hbi
gsleevesandhave
i
ttuckedin.I’
m happywi
tht
heoutf
it
.Itdoesn’
tshowanyfl
eshexceptf
ormylegs.Iweardar
k
bl
ueplatf
orm heels.

Myner
veshav
ekil
l
edmyappet
it
e.Ionl
yhaveacupofcoff
eeandIdri
vetoRi
chardsI
nc.Onthe
wayIt
ryt
owreckmybr
ainf
ort
hereasonI
’m cal
l
edback.Wil
li
tbeanot
heri
nter
vieworwhat
?

Nouset ryi
ngtocrackmyskull.I
’
llfi
ndoutsoonenough.Igett ot hebui
ldingandi t
st hesame
procedureast heprevi
oustime.OnlythistimewhenIar ri
veont he5thfloorIfindthesamel ady
thatlookedafterus.ShehasherowndeskandI ’m notsureifit
’sanotherr ecepti
onar eabuti
t
l
ooksl ikeit
.Ialsonoti
ceanempt ydesknextt ohersandf urtherdownt hehal lt
herearefew
mor eladiesandonegent l
emenattheirownwor kst at
ions.Thent her
ear eseveralcloseddoors
ontheopposi teside.Iassumeit’
sdifferentmanagersandt heirPA’s

Iwal
kuptothel
adyandshegiv
esmeawar m smil
e.Sheisver
ypeti
teandl
i
ghti
ncompl
exi
on.
Bi
geyesandanosethatl
ooksl
ikeshehasEngl
i
shgenes.Sheispr
etty
.

“Goodmor ni
ng.I
’
m LonaSoml
otha.I
’
mrespondi
ngt
oacal
lbyaMsFi
siweGupt
a.”Hersmi
l
e
broadens.

“
Ohy
es.We’
vebeenexpect
ingy
ou.I
’
m Fi
siwe.
”It
houghtshewoul
dbeI
ndi
anwi
thGupt
ali
nks.

“Takeaseat
.MsNdunawil
lcall
youshor
tl
y.Shei
sonaconf
erencecal
lri
ghtnow.Any
thi
ngI
cangety
ou?Tea,
cof
feeorj
uice?”
“
Wat
erpl
ease.
”Myt
hroati
stoodr
y.Shepr
essesabut
tononherdeskandr
equest
swat
er.

Iwalktothewai
tingar
eaandtakeaseat.Therecepti
onar eahasmorel
if
eandchar act
erthan
theoff
iceIwasinthel
astt
ime.Therear
ebeautifulpainti
ngshangi
ngonthewallandtheyall
seem tobedonebyonepersonjudgi
ngbyt hesi
gnat ure.WhoeverR.
Sis,heorsheisabr i
l
li
ant
art
ist
.

Aladydressedinamaidsuniform comesinhol
dingat r
aywi t
habottl
eofwaterandaglass.I
onl
ytakethebottl
eandt hankherthendri
nkunt
ilit
’shal
fway .Notl
adyli
keIknowbutI’
mt ryi
ng
tocal
m my sel
f.Myner
v esareincr
easingasIwai
t.Icanf eel
myunderarmsstart
ingt
osweat .
Thi
sisnotgood.

“MsSomlothapl
easegothr
ough.
”Istand,
placethebot
tl
eofwateronthesi
det
abl
eand
fol
l
owhertothesameoff
iceasbef
ore.Sheknocksonceandl
et’
smei n.

“MsNduna.I
’
m st
eppi
ngoutf
orabi
t.I
sther
eany
thi
ngy
ouneedbef
oreIgo?
”Fi
siweasks.

“No.Thankyou.”Thi
swomaniscol
dthough.Fi
siwenodsandleav
escl
osi
ngt
hedoorbehi
nd
her
.I’
m sti
l
lstandi
ngbythedoorwi
thmybagclutchedi
nfr
ont
.

“CometakeaseatMsSoml ot
haI ’
ll
bewithyouinamoment .”Shehasn’tevenlookedatme
notev
enonce.I
’
m beginni
ngtothinksheisagai
nstl
ookingdi
rect
lyatpeople.Iwalkonwobbl
y
l
egsandtakeaseatopposi
teher.Sheisbusywi
thafil
eandItakethechancet oobserv
eher.

Sheiswear i
nganelegantdar kgreysleev elessdresswi t
hanOshapeneck.I tgoeswithat hree
quarterblazerwhichishangingont hecoathanger .Sheisalsowear i
ngababypi nkbeaded
neckpi ecewhichdropst oherchest .Shei sprobabl ya32bcupsi ze.Shehaspi nkstudsonher
earl
obes.I sthatapinkdiamond?Possi ble.Shedoesn' tstri
kemeasdr essjewell
erytypeofgi r
l.
Herhai rstyl
edintoherpainf
ul l
ookingbun.I tmustbehersi gnat
ur elook.Jerrdoesn'
tshegeta
headachef rom thi
sstyl
e.Herdel icatehandsar eacont rasttoherhar dcor edemeanour .No
ri
ngoranyr i
ngmar ksonherl eftfi
nger .Hernailsar epaint
edi nneut r
alcoloursandcutv ery
shot.Sheonl yhasawat chonherwr i
st.Itl
ooksj ustasexpensi veast herestofher.Iwonder
howl ongorshor therdressis.DoesI tshowcaseherl egs?I sshewear inghersignatureheels.I
onlymetheroncewhywoul dIassumeanypat t
er nbehav i
our?
Il
ookupt
ofi
ndherl
ooki
ngatme.Ear
thswal
l
owmepl
ease.Whyi
stheuni
ver
set
hiscr
uel
?

“
Sor
ryaboutt
hatIhaveabusyday
.Bei
ngwi
thoutaPAi
sal
sonothel
ping.
”Ij
ustnodmyhead.
I
’
m notsur
ehowtor espond.

“MsSomlothaIrevi
ewedy ourappli
cati
on.Yourlackofexperi
enceconcernsme.Idon’thavethe
l
uxuryoft
imetot r
ainsomeone.WhenIhi r
eaper sonIneedthem tobeontheball
.”Iam sti
ll
notsur
eift
hisisapr el
udetoabr ushoff.“
anotherthi
ngisthatIt
ravelal
otandIhavet otr
avel
wit
hmyPA.Doy ouhav eanycommi tmentsthatcouldprev
entyouf r
om t
hat?
”Myki ds.

“Nomam.
”Whodoesn'
tli
eatt
hei
rint
erv
iewswhenst
il
ldesper
atef
oraj
ob?

“Ineedy
ouoncal lanyt
imeoft
heday.IfIneedafi
l
eImustbeabletocal
lyou.Don’
twor
ryI
’
m
notanuisancebutshouldt
heneedar
isethenyoumustbeav
ail
able.
”

“
Yesmam.
”

“You’l
lbeont hreemonthsprobati
oni fwearemut uall
yhappythenthejobi syoursper
manentl
y.
Withstudyandgr owthoppor
tunit
ies.Thisi
sabi gcompanywor ldwide.It
’sfamilyownedand
theyaregoodt othei
remploy
ees.Thi sisbutasmal lsect
ionofthei
rbusiness.Headoffi
ceis
aroundSandton.Youmustbeabl et okeepup.”Igotthejob.Wow.IfeellikeI’
m ondutyal
ready
.

“
Thanky
oumam f
ort
heoppor
tuni
tyIwon'
tlety
oudown.
”

“Youcanst
artbydr
oppi
ngt
hemam.I
t’
sMsNdunaorMonde.
”

“
YesMsNduna.
”Shei
sMst
ome.

“
You’
llstar
tonMonday
.Ouroff
icehour
sare9am to5pm Mondayt
oFri
daybutI
’
m al
way
sher
e
f
rom 6h30to7pm.
”Wil
lIbeexpect
edtobewithherdur
ingt
hosehour
s?
“Wi
l
lIbeexpect
edt
obeher
eatt
hesamehour
sasy
ouMsNduna?
”I’
mter
ri
fi
edofheranswer
.

“
Onl
ywhenneededbuty
ourhour
sremai
n9t
o5pm.
”Whatar
eli
ef.

“Thankyouonceagain.
”Shest
andsandcomesaround.Ial
sostandaccept
ingmydi
smi
ssal
.
JustasIthought
,shei
sweari
ngaredheelandt
hedresssit
sjustbel
owtheknee.

“I’
ll
seey ouonMonday.Welcometothecompany
.”Shest
ret
chesherhandtowar
dsmi
neandI
reci
procate.If
eel
afr
issonofwar
mt hgoi
ngthr
oughmyarm andIqui
cklyl
etgo.

Iwal
koutandshecl
osest
hedooraf
terme.

I
’
m metbyFi
siwe’
sbr
ightsmi
l
e.Ican’
thel
pbutr
etur
nit
.

“
Yougott
hej
ob?
”Sheasks.

“
YesIdi
d,”Joyi
sappar
enti
nmyv
oice.

“Wellcongratul
ationsboo.Wel
cometoRichar
dsInc.dar
li
ng.Hopey oul
astl
ongerthather
prev
iousPA’ s.Il
ikeyou.”Shewhi
sper
s.Thatdoesn'
ti
nsti
lconf
idencei
nme.Isuspectvelet
he
l
adyisasl avedriver.

“
I’
ll
domybest
.”Iweakl
yrespond.

“MsSomlot
ayouhavetobri
ngmoret
hany
ourbest
.MsNdunawon'
tacceptany
thi
ngl
ess.She
hat
eslat
ecoming.Pl
easebeont
ime.
”

“
Cal
lmeLona.Thanky
ouf
ort
headv
ice.
”

“
Usl
adi
eshav
etost
ickt
oget
her
.Whendoy
oust
art
?”
“
OnMonday
.”

“
Cool
.Thatwi
l
lbey
ourdesk.
”Shepoi
ntst
othebi
gempt
ydeskal
ongsi
deher
s.

“
Okay.Thanky
ougir
l.I
’
llseey
ouonMonday
.”Justt
henherphoner
ings.Sheanswer
swhi
l
e
wav
ingmegoodbye.

Ican’tbel
iev
eIgott hej
ob.I’
m soexcit
edandIdon’tknowwhot osharemyexcit
ementwi th.I
t’
s
alongt i
mebef oret
hekidsareback.Wear edef
ini
tel
ygoingoutf
oricecr
eam tocel
ebrate.If
onlyIhadSazi’snumbers.Whatthefuck!WhywouldIeventhi
nkofhim?Iberat
emy sel
f.I
decidetocallLazol
a.Shemighthavehoetendenci
esbutsheissti
llmyfr
iend.

“
HeyChoma.
”Shesoundsdown.

“
Lal
a,ar
eyouokay
?”Ihearhersi
gh.

“
I’
m okayChomaj
ustf
eel
i
ngundert
heweat
her
.”

“Oh.Ar
eyouatwor
k?”

“
No.I
’
m notatwor
k.I
’
m home.What
’sup?
”

“
Igott
hej
ob.
”

“
Whatj
ob?
”

“TheoneIhadani
nter
viewf
orl
astFr
iday
.”

“
Ohcongr
atul
ati
onsChoma.Iknewy
ouwoul
d.”
“Ja.Idi
dn’
tthi
nkIwoul
d.”

“
List
enChoma.Ineedt
ogoI
'
llcal
lyouback.Congr
ats.Mncwa.
”Shehangsup.That
’swei
rd.

I’
m notsurewhatt
odowithmyexcit
ementrightnow.SoIjustgohomet otakeanap.Bythe
ti
meIwakeupi tst
imetofet
chmykidsfrom crèche.WhenIcheckmyphonewhi chIhadputon
si
lence,Ihav
etwomissedcal
lsf
rom Tsi
etsi
.I’
m havenotbeenretur
ninganyofhiscal
l
sthe
wholeweek.

Igofet chmyki
dsandwedri
vebyMilkyLanef
ormyi cecream celebr
ati
on.Theyareexcit
ed
thatIgotajobevent
hought
heyst
il
lthi
nkespeci
all
yKhothatso,Ishouldt
akeherfatherupon
hisoffer.

Theygett
hei
ricecr
eam i
ncupswit
hSmart
iesoni
twhi
l
eIset
tl
eforawaf
fl
ewi
thi
cecr
eam.We
si
tdownandindul
ge.Af
ter
wardswegohome.

Aswegethomewef indTsiet
si‘
scarparkedout
sidemygat
e.Assoonasheseesusheget s
outoft
hecar .Iignor
ehim andwaitfort
hegatet
oopen.Theki
dsareexcit
edtoseetheirdad.
Theyarescreami ngt
hroughthewindow.AssoonasIpar
ktheyoutr
unningtothei
rfat
herwho
pi
cksthem upi nhisarms.Hewalkstowardsme.

“
I’
m her
eformyki
ds.Youknowi
t’
smyt
imeonweekends.
”That
’shi
swayofgr
eet
ing.

“
Ireall
ycan’
tkeepupwit
hy ourschedul
eTsiet
si.Theotherweekendsy ouwer
en’
ther
esowhat
wouldmakethisonedi
ff
erent.Ican’
tkeepupwithyourinconsi
stency
.”

“
Justhav
ethem r
eadysowecango.
”

Il
eavehim outsi
deandgot opackabagfort
hem.NomatterhowangryIam att
hei
rfat
her
,I
can’
tpuni
sht hem bydepr
ivi
nghim.Theyl
ovehi
m andt
heyseenowr ongi
nhim.

Icomebackt
ofi
ndthem i
nthekit
chentel
l
inghim howwewerecelebr
ati
ngmynewj
ob.He
l
ooksupwhenIcomeint
otheroom.Ican’
treadtheemot
ionsi
nhiseyes.
“
Soy
ougotaj
ob.
”

“
Yes.
”

“
Youknowy oudon’
thavet
oworkri
ght
?Icant
akecareofyouLona.Onemorechance.I
’
llpay
f
orthi
shouseorbuyyouanewone.I
’l
lev
engi
veyouyourcarback.Pl
easej
usttakemeback.”
Mustheal
waysmakemet obet
hebadguyinfr
ontoftheki
ds?Ngudotiwomntulo!

“Ican’
tTsietsiandcanwenotdothi
sinf
rontoft
hechil
dren.St
opbadmout hi
ngmewitht
hem
andf i
l
li
ngt hei
rheadswithi
deas.
”Igi
vehi
mt hebagsandhesighs.Takest
hem andt
heki
ds
saytheirgoodby eandt
heyl
eave.

I’
m homealonewithnothi
ngtodo.Myearli
erconversat
ionwit
hLal
awor
ri
esme.Shedidn’
t
soundli
kehersel
fbutIdon’
twanttopush.Hopeful
lyshe’l
lcomet
omewhensheisready.

Si
nceI’llbestar
ti
ngwor konMonday ,Ideci
detogot hr
oughmywar dr
obe.ImeanIhav eall
this
ti
meImi ghtaswell.Icheckwhichclotheswouldbesuitableformynewj obandwhi chwouldn’
t.
Ithenreali
sethereareal otofcl
othesIdon’tneed.Haven’twornintwoy earseven.Iputthe
onestokeepononesi deandonest ogiveawayonanot herside.Idothesamewi tht heki
ds
cl
othes.Thereisalsoaf ewr ef
usebagsofcl ot
hesTsietsilef
tbehind.

Iendupwithei
ghtref
usebagsofcl
othestogiv
eaway .Iknowahomel essshel
teri
nTembisa,
Phomolongsect
ionandIplanondeli
veri
ngthem t
omor row.Theycouldr
eall
yusethem.I
t
takesmehourstohaveal
lthi
ssor
ted.Idon’
tevenpr
epar eanyfoodformysel
f.WhendoneI
j
ustcrawli
ntobed.

Thefol
lowi
ngdayIwakeupint
osilence.Thi
shousef
eelswei
rdwit
houtt
hekids.I
tfeel
sli
kea
haunt
edhouse.Aft
erbr
eakf
astIgetreadyandgototheshel
ter
.If
indi
tbusi
erthanusual
.Then
agai
n,Ihav
en’
tbeenher
einawhile.

Thereiscart
hati
sparkedout
sideanditseemswayoutofplaceint
hisar
eabutthenalotof
wealt
hypeopledocomehereoftentodonatethei
rmoney
.Icall
someoftheboysplay
ing
socceronthest
reett
ocomehel pmecarrythebags.

ThemomentIgoinGogoisalr
eadywai
tingf
ormewi t
hahugupfront.Sheisalovel
yol
dlady
thathasbeent
aki
ngcar
eofthi
shomelessshel
terf
orovert
went
yy ears.Imetherwhenmy
par
ent
swer
est
il
lal
i
ve.Theyuset
obr
ingmeher
esoIcoul
dlear
nbei
nghumbl
e.

Evenwhilemarr
iedIsti
ll
conti
nuedtocomeatleasttwi
ceayear.I
nwinterIwouldbr i
ng
blanket
sandmay beservesoupforadayandi
nsummerIbr oughtcl
othes.Ihadn’tbeenhere
thoughsincemydivor
ce.Isupposewhenyougothroughy
ourownshi tyouforgetaboutother
people’
sneeds.

“
Lonamnt
wanam.Si
kugqi
bel
ekudal
a.Unqabi
l
enont
ombi.(Wehav
en’
tseeny
oui
nal
ongt
ime.
Wher
ehav
eyoubeen?)
”Gogosay
sthemomentsheseesme.

“
Hel
l
oGogo.I
’
vebeenar
ound.Li
fehasbeenhumbl
i
ngme.
”

“Wher
ear
etheki
ds?Lastt
imeIsawy
out
hey
oungonewasn'
tev
enoney
et.
”

“
Theyar
ewi
tht
hei
rfat
her
.Wegotadi
vor
cesot
heyar
evi
sit
inghi
mfort
heweekend.
”

“I
’
m sorr
ytoheart
hat
.Youki
dsnowaday
ssol
veev
ery
thi
ngwi
thdi
vor
ce.Ani
kwazi
nje
unyamezel
a.”

“Hay
iGogosomet
hingsar
ejusti
ntol
erabl
e.”

“Li
kewhat ?Cheati
ng?Al
lmencheatchild.Youj
usthavetomakesurehedoesn'tlookelse
where.”Likehow?Heisagrownassmanmoss.I fhewantstolookhe’
l
llook.Therei
sn’ta
damnt hingIcandoabouti
t.Idon’
ttel
lGogothatIl
ethershar
eherwisdom asshewal kswit
h
mei nt
ot hehouse.

“
IhearyouGogo.
”Inodandmaket henecessar
ysounds.Nousear
gui
ngwi
thol
dpeopl
eabout
t
hesancti
tyofmarr
iage.Kuy
abekezel
wa.

“Ihopeyouwor kthi
ngsoutfort
hesakeofyourchil
dren.Now.Comel etmei nt
roducey out
o
someone.”Therewego.Gogoi sgoingt
otryandfixmeup.If ol
l
owhert otheback.Tomy
shockthepersonshewantst oi
ntr
oducemei sSazi.Thi
sisbecomingweird.Hei sli
keamagnet.
Hei sev
erywhere.Heisbusywashingdi
sheswithtwot eenager
s.I
t’
sal otofdishes.Icansee
hei
sjustasshockedt
oseeme.

“
Sazi
,Ibr
oughtmor
ehel
p.MeetLona,
Lonat
hisi
sSazi
.”

“
We’
vemetal
readyGogo.
”Her
esponds.

“
Ohokayke.Letmeleav
eyou.Ineedt
ogototheshops.Mariaasambeni
.”Haut
hetwogir
ls
f
oll
owGogo.Doesthi
smeanwear eondi
shduty?Coul
dn’tIbetheonetogotot
heshops?

“
Lona,
goodt
oseey
ouagai
n.Howar
eyou?
”

“Hi
Sazi
.I’
mfi
ne.AndYou?
”

“
I’
m good.Wher
ear
etheki
ds?
”

“
Wit
hthei
rfat
herf
ort
heweekend.HowcanIhel
p?”

“Bydryi
ngandpacki ngthem i
nthatcont
ainerov
ert here.
”Istar
twor ki
ngandweconti
nuefora
whilei
nsi l
ence.Ihavet
ostandbesidehim.Iwatchhi sstr
onghandsashewashesandwi thal
l
thatsoap.Thewayhi sarm muscl
esworkashepi cksupt hedishes.Ifeel
thewar
mth
emanat i
ngfrom him.Wearetoocl oset
oeachot her.Hisscentfi
ll
smynost r
il
sandIqui
veri
n
mysecr etplace.I
t'
sgoingtobelongday.

“
Somanydi
shes.Whathappenedt
hismor
ning?
”If
eel
theneedt
obr
eakt
hesi
l
ence.

“Theyhadasoccermatchwit
hot
hershel
ters.Gogowashost
ing.Nowt
heyal
lwentf
orahi
ke
exceptf
ort
hetwogirl
s.Youcomeher
eoften?”

“
Notasof
tenasIwoul
dli
ke.Hav
en’
tbeenher
eint
woy
ear
s.Andy
ou?
”

“Thi
sisl
i
kemysecondhome.
”Hedoesn’
tel
abor
ate.Wear
esi
l
entagai
njustt
hesoundoft
he
waterashewashes.Hi sbrowi sfur
rowedasheconcent rateont hetaskathand.Hei svery
sl
owandt horough.You’ dswearhewaspai nti
ngaPi casso.Thisi sgoi
ngt obeverylong.I’
m not
sureIcanl astt
hatlongwi thoutjumpinghisbones.Ifeelhi
sbr eathfanningmyfaceev eryti
me
heturnsinmydi rection.Somet i
mesourhandsacci dental
lytouchasweexchanget hedishes.
Thef r
issonofawar enesst hatcoursesthr
oughmybodywhent hathappensispotent.I
’mina
perpetualstat
eofar ousal.Ifeari
fhewer etomakehi smov eI’dthrowmymor al
soutt he
window.

“
Ourpat
hsseem t
obedest
inedt
ocr
oss.Iwonderwhyt
hatI
s?”hebr
eakst
hesi
l
encet
hist
ime

“
Coi
nci
dence?
”

“
May
be.Orf
ate.
”

“
Whatwoul
dourf
atebet
hen?
”Scr
eweachot
her
'sbr
ainof
f.

“
Younev
erknow.Fat
ewi
l
ldeci
dewhent
orev
eal
itssel
f.Wej
usthav
etof
lowwi
thi
t.
”

Istar
tquesti
oninghim aboutt histheoryandwear gueourdif
fer
entpointofv i
ews.Heisvery
calminhisargument s.Helistensandconcedeswhenhef eel
smypoi ntisright
.Heisableto
breakdownhi spointofvi
ewsot hatyouar eabl
et ounder
stand.Heisagr eatconver
sati
onali
st.
Whenhedeci destospeakt hati s.Hisvoicealonebreaksmybodyi nt
ogoosebumps.Icoul d
l
istentohi
m alldayandal lnight.Especiall
yatnightwhenhedoesot herthingswit
hhisstrong
hands.Si
gh.Hoet endencies.

Threehourslat
erwear esti
ll
ati t
.We’v
echangedwat eratl
eastthreetimes.Itdoesn’
thelpthat
hefir
stri
nsesthedirtoutbeforewashi
ng.It
sapr ocesswit
hhim.Hadi tbeenmewashi ng,the
fi
rstbat
chofwat erwouldhav ebeenenough.Fort
unatel
ywear eonlyleftwithtwobigpots.I’
m
notevenfi
ll
ingthesil
enceany more.Ij
ustwantthisoverwi
th.Ican’tevensitdownbecauset he
tabl
eistoohigh.

“
Doy
ouhav
epl
ansf
ort
her
estoft
heday
?”Heasks.

Yes.Cr
awl
int
omybedandpl
easur
emy
sel
fwi
thy
ouri
magesi
nmi
ndunt
ilmyf
inger
shur
t.
“Notr
eall
y.I
’
llpr
obabl
ygohomeandnap.Thenr
eadaft
erwar
ds.”Hei
sri
nsingt
helastpot
.
Thankthest
arswearedone.Hewi
peshi
shandswit
hadryclot
handIdothesame.

“Wouldyouli
ketogooutwit
hme?At hi
askedmet
oat
tendoneofhi
spar
ti
es.Ineedcompany
.”
Dude!Shoul
dn’
tyourwi
febeyourcompany?

“Sazi
.Imustadmi t,
Ilov
eyourcompanybutI ’mreal
lyuncomfort
abl
ewitht
hepositi
ont hatyou
areputt
ingmei n.Iwasontheothersi
deoft hi
sscenari
o.Don’tmakemeanaccompl icetoyour
dir
tydeali
ngs.Youaremarri
edandmeaccompany i
ngyoutoparti
esisr
eal
lynotappropriat
e.”
Hehashi sarmsf ol
dedinf
rontasheintent
lywatchesmet hr
oughoutmyspeech.Hesi ghs.

“Il
iket
hatyouenj
oymycompany
.Thefeeli
ngi
smutual
.Woul di
thel
pify
ouknewthatmywife
knowsaboutyou?
”It
smytur
ntofrown.I
’
m conf
usedasfuck.Whatki
ndofki
nkyshi
tisheupto?

“
Idon’
tfol
l
ow.
”It
rul
ydon’
t.Thi
sseemsl
i
keani
ndecentpr
oposal
typeofsi
tuat
ion.

“
Sheknowsthatwe’v
emetacoupl eoft
imes.ThatIpai
dforyourcarr
epair
s.Sheknowswehad
l
unchtheot
herday.I
t’
spartofhowIspentmydaysandwet ell
eachotherhowourday'
swent
.
I
fyougowithmetonightshewil
lknow.
”

“
Whywoul
dyout
ell
yourwi
feal
lthat
?”

“
BecauseIhav
enot
hingt
ohi
de.
”Hel
ooksatmei
ncr
edul
ousl
y.

“Oh.
”That’
sall
Icanmanage.Maybemydi rt
ymi ndi
sconj
uri
ngupasituati
onthatisn’
tther
e.
Theguyhasbeenproperev
ersi
nceImethi m.It
’smywaywardmindthat’
smisguidingme.The
dudedoesn'
tevenseemethatway.Gosh!Ifeel
soembarr
assedri
ghtnow.

“
Iunder
standi
fyouar
euncomf
ort
abl
eLona.May
beIshoul
dn'
thav
easked.
”

“No,i
t’
snott hat.Ij
ustwantedt
obeclearaboutyouri
ntent
ions.I
t’
scool.I
’
llgowithyou.
”I
answerwithoutgi v
ingi
tasecondthought
.Ibett
erkeepmyhor monesincheck.Theyare
defi
nit
elyr
agi ngli
keateenager
’sr
ightnow.
“
Great
!I’
l
lpi
cky
ouupatsi
x.I
sthatcool
wit
hyou?
”

“
It
’sf
ine.I
’
llber
eady
.”

After
wardsIl
eav
ebefor
eGogocomesback.Ican’
twai
tanyl
onger
.WhenIgethomeIdeci
det
o
takeanapandsetanal
armf
or5pm.

I
’m wokenupbyaper sist
entannoyi
ngsound.It
’smyal arm.Iswit
chitof
fandl
iether
ethinki
ng
oft
heev eni
ngahead.ShouldItr
ustSaziandhisintent
ions?Hehasn’
tgivenmeanyreasonnot
tot
rusthim.I’
mtempt edtoGooglehi
m butthenI’m notsureIwantt
oseehiswif
e.Thatwill
j
ustmakehermor ereal i
nmyhead.

Event
uall
yIgetupandtakeashower.Whilei
ntheshowerItakecar
eofmyneedsj usttogetthe
urgeoff
.Nothi
ngworkswondersintheshowerthatt
heshowerhead.OnceI’
m doneIleavethe
showeronwobblyl
egs.Thatshoul
dpreventmef r
om jumpi
ngtheman’sbones.

Imissmykids.Iwr
apmy sel
finatowelandcal
lthem.Theissuewi
ththi
scalli
sthatIhav
eto
gothrought
heTOS( ToenailOfSat
an)
.Heanswersimmediatel
yandIcanhearmykid'shappy
chatt
eri
nginthebackground.

“
Mywi
fe.
”If
ightt
heur
get
ogag.

“
Tsi
etsi
mayIspeakt
otheki
ds.
”

“I
’
mfi
net
hanky
ou,
howar
eyou?
”I’
m notgoi
ngt
oent
ert
ainhi
m.Hecal
l
stheki
ds.

“
Mommy
.”Theybot
hsayatt
hesamet
ime.

“
Heymybabi
es.Howar
eyou?

“
Wef
inemamaj
ustmi
ssi
ngy
ou?
”Khot
hat
sor
esponds.

“
Grannyi
sher
e.”Thatwoul
dbeNt
hat
isi
.
“Oh.Isshe? ”Icoul
dsayal
otaboutthatwomanbutIcouldbeonspeaker
.Inaddit
ioni
tsthei
r
grandmot herIcan’
tbadmouthher
.Eventhoughshedoesn'
thesi
tat
eto.Sheistheoneperson
whocel ebratedwhenwediv
orced.

“
Shesay
syouar
enotdoi
ngagoodj
obmama.Weshoul
dspeakherl
anguage.
”Nt
hat
isi
say
s.

“
Shedoes?
”If
eignshock.

“
Yes.Andshesay sweshoul
dgostaywit
hher.Idon’
twantt
ost
aywi
thhermamashei
smean.
”
Nthat
isi
cont
inues.Somet
imesIf
orgett
hischi
ld’
sage.

“That
’snotani
cet
hingt
osayaboutanadul
tNt
hat
i.
”Al
lI’
m say
ingi
nmyheadi
sthatt
ell
her
somemor emybaby.Ol
dmiser
abl
egoat.

“
Sor
rymommy
.”

“
It
’sokay
.Khot
hat
soy
ouar
etooqui
et,
arey
ouokay
?”

“
I’
mfi
nemommy
.Imi
ssy
ou.
”

“
Imi
ssy
out
ooguy
s.I
’
llseey
out
omor
row.Behav
e.”

Wesayourgoodby
esandhangup.

Ineedtochooseanout fi
t.It
’sal
waysastruggle.Idon'
twanttobeover
dressedorunderdressed
ei
ther
.Eventual
lyIdecideonanof fwhi
teoversizedsweaterof
foneshoul
derandov ert
heknee
hi
ghheel bei
geboots.Ilookhotifmaysaysomy self
.Mycurl
yweavewilldo.I
’
mr eadyjustin
ti
meast hedoorbel
lrings.Iputmymakeupi nmycl ut
chbagjustf
oraret
ouchlateronandI ’
m
off
.Sazigetsoutofthecarast hegat
eopens.

Ist
artdr
ooli
ng.Hei
swearingsl
i
mf i
tfadeddenimj
eans,
offwhit
eroundnecksweat
erwi
th
sl
eevesrol
l
edupjustbel
owhiselbowsanddar kbr
ownshoes.Helookshot
.Am Ial
l
owedto
sayt
hat
?Inmyhead,
hel
lyes!

Hewalkst
omet hemomentIgetoutofthegate.Westandi
ngi
nfrontofhi
scarnotsay
ing
any
thi
ng.Hehashishandsi
nhi
spockets.Ist
artfeel
i
ngawkward.

“
Hey
.”That
’sal
lIt
hinkof
.

“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
”Myt
ummycl
enches.

“
Thanky
ou.
”Itcomesoutbr
eat
hy.I
’
m scr
ewed.

Hesnapsi ntoacti
onandwal ksar oundtothepassengerdoorthenopensf orme.Hehol dst he
dooropenf orme.I’m dr
owni ngi nhisscentri
ghtnow.Inav erygoodway .It’
sabitofaclimb
togeti
nanIf eelt
hesweat err i
dingup.I’
m suremywhol ethighisout
.Hopef ul
lyI
’m notfl
ashi ng
him myass.It’snotthatshor tthough,Iconsol
emy sel
f.OnceI ’
minhecl osesthedoorand
walksaround.Thisgivesmeachancet ooglehim abit
.Themani sgorgeous.Notinafemi nine
way.Hei sallman.

Hecomesi nandst art

sthecar.Wedon’tsayany t
hingf orawhi
le.I
’
m gettingusedt othesil
ence.
I
tonlybother
smeal it
tl
e.Iwatchhismuscl esonhisforearmsandhowt heywor kashest eers
t
hecar .Hi
slongleanfingerst
hatlookli
kehehasnev erknownthemeaningofhar dworkinhis
l
if
e.I’
m sureheismagi cwiththosehands.Isther
easay i
ngaboutamanandasi zeofhis
f
ingers?Iwonder.Somet hi
ngaboutthesizeofaman’ shandandhi sanatomyt henwehav ea
winnerher
e.Ineedt ogetmymi ndoutoft hegutt
er.Ichasti
sethei
nnerhoe.

Het
apsmyt
highwi
tht
hebackofhi
shand.

“
Ear
tht
oLona!
”Thatwasn'
tev
ensexual
butthewaymybodyr
eact
syou’
dswearhepr
omi
sed
meamuff
.Whyam Ithi
nki
ngofbei
ngmiff
edatati
meli
kethi
s?

“
Sor
ry.Mymi
ndj
ustwonder
edabi
t.
”Awhol
elot
.Toaf
orbi
ddenpar
adi
se.

“
Rel
ax.You’
l
lbef
ine.
”
“Whyi
sAt
hihav
ingapar
ty?
”onl
ynowIask.Twi
stedpr
ior
it
ies.

“
It
’snotr
eal
l
yapar
ty.Thepar
tywi
l
lcomel
ater
.Hei
shost
ingaf
undr
aisi
ngev
ent
.”

“Oh.Am Idr
essedappr
opri
atel
yfort
hat
.Youshoul
d’
vesai
dsoSazi
.”I
’
m abi
tannoy
ed.Peopl
e
dressedi
nballgownsf
orsuchevent
s.

“Youaredressedper
fect
.”Ahwell i
fthemansay sI’
m per
fectthenI’
m perf
ect.Hehasaccessto
Athi’
spl
acesowepar kinthebasementandt aketheelev
ator.Neverbeinaconfinedspace
withsomeonewhohast heabil
it
yt odrenchyourpanti
esbyjustalook.Ishould’
velef
thimto
takeaelev
atorandtakenthest
airs.Ineedtheexerci
se.

Assoonast hedoorcl osedIf eelmyheartbeat

ingagainstmychest.I
’m sur
ehecanhearit.My
l
ipsaredryandIli
ckt hem justt omoist
enthem.WhenIl ookupheisleaningagainstt
hewall
s
oftheelev
atorst
aringatmebehi ndhi
shoodedey es,
handsinhispockets,obvi
ouslyandone
footovert
heother.Hei srelaxedwhileI’
m sweati
ngprofusel
yunderthesweater.Il
ookaway.

Ist
eal
anothergl
anceathi
m andhest
il
ll
ooki
ngatme.Saysomet
hing.Any
thi
ngbef
orey
ou
makeafoolofyour
sel
f.

“
It
’seasi
ert
ogeti
nher
ewi
thy
out
hati
twaswhenIcamebymy
sel
f.
”Hi
sey
eswi
den.

“
You’
vebeenher
ebef
ore?
”

“
LastweekFr
iday
.At
hihadapar
tyandi
nvi
tedLal
awhoi
nvi
tedme.
”Hef
rowns.

Thel i
ftpingsandopens.Icanf i
nal
lybreathe.HeleadsmeandIf ollowt owardsAt hi
’
s
apar t
ment .HeknocksandAt hiopens.ThereisonlyAthiher
enooneel sebuthei sdressedina
blacksl i
mf it
tingsui
tandhelooksmi ght
yf i
ne.Lighti
ncomplexion, cl
eanshav enwithafade
haircut.I
’m notsurehewantst ost
artdreadsort heuncombedaf r
oi nintent
ional.Fi
tli
keall
soccerpl ayers.Hisl
egshavethebracketfordays.HeisnotastallasSazi buthei saheadtall
er
thanme.
Theygreeteachot
herwi
thonear
m hugsandt
henhegi
vesmeahug.I
’
m notsur
ewhywear
e
here.Nooneelsei
s.

“
Dri
nkLona?
”At
hiasks.

“
Vodkawi
thl
emonadepl
ease,
”Ir
espond.

“Comingri
ghtup.
”Hegoestomixt
hedri
nksatthebar.Ij
oinSazi
whoisrel
axedinthel
ounge.I
seatopposi
tehi
m.Cl
utchbagonmylapasift
oprotectmyv i
rt
ue.Asi
fIsti
l
lpossessany.

“
Ithoughtt
her
ewasapar
ty.
”Isay
.Ihopehehasnoménageàt
roi
sfant
asi
es.I
’
m notabout
t
hat.

“
Wearesti
llonourway.Wegi
vi
ngAt
hial
i
ft.
”Whywoul
dwebegi
vi
ngagr
ownassmanal
i
ft?
Hashenev
erheardofUber
?

“
Oh.”IsowanttoaskbutIdon’
twantt
opry
.Athibri
ngsusdr
inksandt
henathoughtoccur
s.I
l
ookatthi
sdri
nkandthenbackathim.Hel
aughsthen t
akesasipofmydr
ink.

“i
tsnotspi
ked,
”hesay
sgivi
ngi
tbackt
ome.If
eel
li
keani
diotr
ightnow.IcanseeSazi
is
curi
ousbuthewon'
task.

Athir
etur
nswi t
hhisowndrinkandt
akesaseatontheot
herside.Theymakesmalltal
kabout
thedaysexpectat
ion.Ir
eal
i
sethatt
hefundr
aisi
ngi
sforasoccerclubthatAt
hihasopenedfor
thedi
sadvantagedkids.

JustasI’
m begi
nni
ngtogetl
osti
nmydr
eamsal
adywal
ksdownt
hest
air
s.At
higet
supwi
tha
bi
gsmi l
eonhisface.

“Heybaby.Youl
ookhot.”Shedoes.Shei
swear
ingabodyhuggi
ngbl
ackdr
esswi
tht
hehi
ghest
ofheel
s.Sheispossi
bleasize28.

“Thankyoulov
e.”Lov
e?Hegi
vesheraqui
ckki
sst
henhol
dsherhandl
eadi
nghert
ous.Sazi
is
onhi sf
eet.
“
HeySazi
goodt
oseey
ou.
”Shesay
sgi
vi
nghi
m ahug.

“
Hi Nat
ali
e.Idi
dn’
tknowy ouwereback.
”Hesaysret
urni
ngt
hehug.Thent
heypul
lapar
t.She
t
urnsandlooksatme.Iseehersizi
ngmeup.It
’squi
ckbuti
t’
sther
e.

“Nats.ThisisLona,
Sazi
’
sfri
end.Lonathi
sismyf i
ancéNatal
ie.
”Ohhell
.Anot
herawkward
sit
uation.Igi
vehermybestsmil
e.Shewon'theari
tfrom methathermanisf
ucki
ngaround.I
givehermyhand.shejustl
ooksatitandi
gnoresit
.Yhu.Impoxoengaka!

“Doesyourwif
eknowt hatyouhaveyourfr
iendwit
hyouSazi
?Thewayshesays‘
fri
end’you’
d
swearitwasaninsul
t.Iunder
standwheresheiscomingf
rom.Shei
spr
obablyl
ookingoutfor
herfr
iend.Iwi
thdr
awmyhandandsi tmyassbackdown.Asipofmydri
nkdoesthetri
ckto
calm medown.

“Howisthatanyofy
ourbusi
nesst
houghNat
ali
e?Ar
eyoumywi
fe’
sspokesper
son?
”YhoI
neverexper
ir
it
.

“Justaski
ng.Sorr
y,”shegi
ggl
es.“
Nicemeet
ingy
ouLona.
”Igi
veherasmal
lsmi
l
emyhandi
sn’
t
goingbackthere.

Athi
issit
ti
ngonasi nglesetteeandshegoesandj oinshim sit
ti
ngonhislap.Wechil
l f
or
al
mosttwohour s.Iguessthisispre-
drinkstypeofthing.Athi
istheli
feoft
hegroup.Hehasa
l
otoffasci
nati
ngandf unnystori
estoshar e.Weareal lcr
acki
ngupexceptforSaziofcour
se.
Theguyevenhascont roloverhowhel aughsandhowmuch.Iwoul dlov
etoseehiml oset
hat
cont
rolabit
.

Athidi
sappearsforali
tt
lewhi
leunti
lSazideci
dest
ogolookforhi
m.Iguessi
t’
sti
mewewent
tothi
sfuncti
on.Af ewminut
eslat
ertheycomeback.Sazi
lookspi
ssedandAt
hiseemsv
ery
happy.Iwonder.

“
Timet
ogo.
”Sazi
cli
ps.

Idownmydr inki
nonego.Ican’
twastegoodalcohol.Weal
lgetwhatweneedandfol
l
owSazi
tothel
i
ft.Therei
snoconversat
ion.Hemightbeabletohi
dehisemoti
onsbutt
hist
ime
annoyanceiswri
ttenall
overhisface.At
hiseemsobl
i
viousordoesn'
tgi
veapoo.Iwantt
oask
butthenagaini
t’
snotmybusi ness.Themoodi nt
hel
if
tisincont
rastt
otheear
li
ermood.Ah
well
.Itmightbeforthebest
.

Natal
i
ahasherhandshookedar
oundAthit
hewholewaytothecar
.Sher
eal
l
yisst
aki
ngher
cl
aim.Ifsheonl
yknewt
hatIonl
yhaddarkfant
asi
esaboutoneman.

Whenwer eachthecarSaziopenst
hef r
ontpassengerdoorf
orme.Hemakessuretostand
behindmeandshiel
dmeasIcl i
mbin.IguessI’
mr eveal
i
ngmorethanIshoul
d.Wedri
vein
si
lencel
ist
eningtomusic.Hehasami xofever
ythi
ngsoIcan’tpi
nhimtoanygenr
ebutthere
aremorehip-
hopsongsont hi
splay
li
st.

Ideci
detotuneoutevery
thingelseandenj
oytheri
de.I
'
ml ooki
ngoutt
hewindowwhenIfeel
a
taponmyt high.Heseemst ol
ikegett
ingmyatt
enti
onthatway.I
fheknewhewasrecei
vi
ng
att
ent
ioninotherhi
ddenareas.Itur
nandlookathi
m.

“Ar
ey ouokay
?”heasks.Ionl
ynodmyheadandheconcentr
atesonhi
sdri
vi
ng.Ourcoupl
eis
havi
ngahushedconversat
ionandNat
ali
ebr
eaksi
ntogi
gglesnowandagai
n.

Wearri
veatthev enue.I
t’
spr
oper .Hostedi
naconferencecent
reofoneoftheupclasshotel
sin
Sandt
on.Therearepeoplear
rivi
ngt hesameti
measus.Ispotaf ewcelebr
it
ies,
localbusi
ness
peopl
eandal otofsoccerpl
ayers.Curr
entandret
ir
ed.Thisisabi
gdeal.

Onceweareinsi
dethevenuewear edir
ect
edtoourassi
gnedt
abl
e.Aswegot
hroughIspot
Tsi
etsi
inoneofthetabl
es.Fuck!Thi
sisgoi
ngtobelongni
ght
.

“
What
’st
hat
?”Sazi
asks.Hei
sfol
l
owi
ngcl
osel
ybehi
ndme.

“
Myexi
sher
e.”

“
Ishegoi
ngt
obeapr
obl
em?
”Hel
lyes.Hei
saTOS.Hewasbor
ntobeapr
obl
em.

“
I’
m notsur
e.”Ir
espond.
“
Don’
twor
ryLona.I
’
llt
akecar
eofy
ou.
”If
eelsaf
eal
ready
.

Chapt
er5

“
Ital
lj
ustsoundsl
i
keooh,
oohoohoohooh

Mm,
tooy
oung,
toodumbt
oreal
i
ze

ThatIshoul
dhav
eboughty
ouf
lower
s

Andhel
dyourhand

Shoul
dhav
egav
eyoual
lmyhour
s

WhenIhadt
hechance

Takey
out
oev
erypar
ty'
causeal
lyouwant
edt
odowasdance

Nowmybaby
'sdanci
ng

Butshe'
sdanci
ngwi
thanot
herman”
-Br
unoMar
s

Wesi tatthet
ablethathasbeenreser
vedforAthi andhiscompany.Ihappentosi
tnextt oSazi,
obviousl
yandthensomeguywhoseemsf amil
i
arbutIcan’ ttel
lwhereIknowhimfrom.Qui ck
i
ntroducti
onsaredoneandt heguynextt
omepl ay sf
oroneoft hepopul
arSouthAfr
ican
footbal
lteams.Thereisal
soacoupleofthosear oundthetablewit
htheirwi
vesorgirl
fr
iends.

Ihearthem t
alkaboutsoccer
.Whomadei tintheleague,
who’ssoldbywhom t owhere.Some
namedr oppi
nghereandt her
e.Izoneout
.I’
m notaboutthatl
i
fe.Soccerbringsbackmemor ies
oftheTOSwi thhi
sfri
endswat chi
ngagamei nthehouseandbeingr owdyandinconsider
ate.I
don’tgetwhypeoplegogagaov ergr
ownassmenwhochaseabal laroundthefi
eld.

“Youseem faraway.Wher
eisy
ourmindat
?”Itur
nt ofacehi
m.Shi
tIdi
dn’
treal
i
sehewasthi
s
close.Hehasturnedt
ofacemeandevenl
eanedcloser.Myf
aceal
mostbumpshisasIt
urn

“Mheh.”Ican’
tseem t
oputacoherentthoughttogether.Heissti
ll
stari
ngint
omyey es.Ican
act
uall
yseehisir
iscol
our.Ihadt
houghthiseyeswerej ustanormalbrown.Nope.Thereis
not
hingnormalaboutSaziKhumal
o.Hiseyesareactuallyamberandv er
ystri
ki
ng.It
’sl
ikeI’
m
l
ookingint
othedepthsoffi
re.Myeyesdroptohisli
ps.Dot heytast
eassoftastheylook.I
wonder.
“
Lona.
”Hi
svoi
cehasahi
ntofawar
ningi
nit
.

“
Yes.
”Isoundbr
eat
hless.

“
Iaskedi
fyouwer
eokay
.”Wear
elooki
ngst
rai
ghti
ntoeachot
her
’sey
es.

“
Yeah.
”No.Mynubi
sthr
obbi
ng.

“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
odr
ink?
”onl
ythenIr
eal
i
set
her
eisadr
inksmenuont
het
abl
e.

“I
’
llhavet
hesamedri
nkIhadbackatAt
hi’
s.
”Henodshi
sheadandcal
l
sawai
tr
essov
ert
hen
order
sourdr
inks.

“Youseem bor
ed.
”Hesay s.Hehashi
sarm balanci
ngov
ert
hebackofmychair.Thi
sbr
ingshi
m
closert
omeandI’m sur
roundedbyhi
sscent.Oneofmyfav
our
it
ethingsabouthim.

“
I’
mjustnotasoccerf
an.
”Hesmi
l
es.Myt
ummyf
lut
ter
s.

“Ineededt ocomeandseet hisformy self

.”If
eel
Sazitenseasacommandingandarrogant
voi
cehal t
stheconv er
sat
iononthet able.Il
ookuptofi
ndanoldergentl
emenwithsal
tand
pepperhairstandi
ngbyourtablelookingatnooneelsebutAthi
.Athii
shol
dinghisgl
assso
hardIfearthatitmi
ghtspri
nteri
ntopieces.

“Whenwi l
lyoustopembar r
assi
ngme?Musty oual wayssurr
oundy ourselfwi t
hpeasants?Do
youknowhowhar dyourgrandf
atherworkedf orhisweal t
h?Noofcour sey oudon’t!Youjust
wantt obri
ngournamet othegroundbyi nsi
stingont hesesil
l
ygames!Wedon’ tbegpeoplefor
moneyAt henkosi!Whenwi ll
youlearnyourplacei nsociet
y!Youst i
l
l i
nsistonhangi ngaround
wit
ht hist
hrash!
”hemakesasweepi nggesturt owardsSaziwithoutevenl ookingathim.Ifeel
i
ncludedinthecat egor
yoft r
ash.Sazi’
sjawiscl enchingashewat chesAt hi.ThesameAt hiwho
hasjustdownedhi sfull
glassinonego.I ’
m notsur ewhot hi
smani sbuthehast wo
bodyguardsstandingbehindhim.

“
Ist
her
eany
thi
ngi
npar
ti
cul
ary
our
equi
rebybei
ngher
efat
herordoy
ouj
ustenj
oy
embar
rassi
ngme?
”At
hi’
stonei
sfl
at.Thi
sisnott
heeasygoi
ngmanIknow.

“Cal
lofft
hisj
okeofafunct
ionandcomehome.I
fit
smoneyyouneed,
wehavemoney!”Sazi
getsupandasksever
yoneelset
odothesameasweal
lleav
ethefamil
ytodi
scusst
heiri
ssues.
Athi
’sf
atheri
soneint
ensedude.

Theotherpeoplestandadi
stancefr
om t
het
ableandawai t
erimmediatel
ycomestooffert
hem
dri
nks.Sazicont
inuestowal
kuntil
wearest
andingout
sidethevenue.Icanseeheneedsto
cooloff
.

“
Arey
ouokay
?”Iask

“
I’
m cool
.”Heisqui
cktoanswer
.Iknowaswel
lashi
mthati
t’
sal
i
e.I
’
m nev
eronet
opr
ythough.
Westandoutsi
deinsi
l
enceforabi
t.

“Athi
’sdadhasawayofmaki ngmef eelot
herwise.Ihatethefeel
ingIgetwhenev erheis
around.I’
m myownmandammi tandliv
emyl ifeinmyownt erms!”Noonecanmi st
akehimfor
ay esman.Idon’tknowwhatt odosoIj ustmov ecl
oseandbr ushhisarmf orcomfort
.Big
mistake.Touchi
ngSaziisexplosive.IwonderifhefeltwhatIfel
torit’
sjustme.WhenIl ookup
andf i
ndhim stari
ngstr
aighti
ntomyey es.Iquickl
yletgoofhisarm.Ndi dl
alangomlil
oapha.

“Let
sgobackin.”Hedoesn'twaitformyr esponseasIf ol
lowhim.Wefi
ndAthi’
sfathergone
andpeopl
ebackt othei
rseats.Justaswesi tAt
histandsandwalksaway.Sazif
ollows
i
mmedi at
ely
.I’
ml ef
twithpeopleIdon’tknowexceptf orNatal
iewhoi
ssitti
ngont heothersi
de
ofthet
ablewecan’tevenhav eaconversation.Nothattherewoul
dbeanyhadshesatcl oser
.
Sheisasnobperiod.

I
t’
st i
mesl i
ketheseImi sshavi
ngLalaaround.Wewoul dbegossi
pingaboutev eryoneel
seri
ght
now.Mrf ootbal
lernexttomet akest
heoppor t
uni
tytoengagemeinaconv ersati
on.The
problem i
sthati
t ’
sallabouthi
m andhiscareer
,endor
sementsandTVads.Idon’ thavethe
hearttotel
lhimt hatIdon’
thaveacluewhohei sbutheseemstothinkev
er y
oneknowshi m.

Theonl
yfootbal
l
erIknowisCR7andnotforhi
ssoccerskil
lstoobuthislooks.Sothi
sonei
s
real
l
ydel
usional
ifheexpect
smet oknowhi
m.Ireal
isethoughthatIdon’
tneedt osaymuch.A
smil
ehereandanodtherekeepshi
m goi
ng.I
t’
salmostahal fanhourl
aterwhent het
wo
r
etur
ns.

Assoonast heysi tthef unct

ionbegi ns.Athistandstothankev er
yonef orcomi ngandgi vesa
backgr oundandav isionforhisclub.Hei spassi onat
eaboutt hi
sproject.Icanseei tcomes
from thehear t.Ithinki t
’sanexcellentideaforsoccerdev elopmentinourcount ry,
yout h
developmentandourcommuni t
y.Especi al
lythosewhocomef r
om disadv ant
agedhomesand
cannotaf for
dt ogot ot heexpensiv eyouthsoccerpr ogr
ammes.ImustsayIam i mpr essedand
i
tmakesmer eali
set hatther
eismor etoAt hithanmeetst heeye.Whenhei sdonet hewhole
room st andsandappl audshim.

Themaincourseisbei
ngservedandtheconv
ersat
ionshav
eresumed.Inot
icet
hatsi
nceAt
hi’
s
ret
urnt
othetableheonlydr
inkswater
.

“
Howar
ewepay
ingorcont
ri
but
ingt
othi
sfundr
aisi
ngt
hing?
”IaskSazi
.

“
It
’sal
readypai
dfor
.Peopl
ehav
etopayi
nadv
ance.
”

“
Oh.Whopai
dformet
hen?
”Tr
ustmet
oaskt
heobv
ious.

“Idi
d.”Icanseei t
’snotopenfordi
scussion.West ar
ttal
kingaboutthefoodandthe
conversati
onf l
owsfrom t
here.Aft
erthemeal isdonethemusi cbegi
ns.Therear
elocalar
ti
sts
perf
ormi ng.Peopl
earedancinganddr i
nking.I
t’
sfun.IwanttogodancebutIdon’thavea
dancepar tner
.JustwhenI'
m abouttogetupandgot ofreshenupNatali
etapsmeonmy
shoulder.

“
Comel
et’
sgodanceLunga.
”Shei
sni
ceandt
ipsy
.

“
It
’sLona.
”

“
Whatev
er.
”Ngowoxol
elwal
oshame.

Igetupandfoll
owherti
nyasstothedancef
loor
.Westar
tjoi
ningev
ery
oneel
sedanci
ng.I
’
min
myelement.Justt
henIfeel
ati
ghtgri
ponmyupperar
m.It’
stheTOS.
“WhatthefuckTsi
etsi
!Letgoyouar
ehur
ti
ngme!
”Hepul
l
smecl
osert
ohi
m.Hi
snai
l
sar
e
diggi
ngint
omyar m.Hei sreal
l
yhur
ti
ngme.

“
Comewi thmeanddon’ tyoudaremakeascene. ”Heismanhandl i
ngmer i
ghtnow!I
’m shook.
Hepull
smet owardstheexit
.Ihavenochoi cebutt
ofoll
ow.Ther oom i
st ooloudtoevenalert
Natal
i
ethatthecrazymanisabductingme.Whenwegetout si
dehel et
sgoandIal mostlose
mybalance.Ir
ubatmyar m whichissti
ngingbadly
.I’
veneverseenTsietsit
hisangr
yand
f
rankl
yforthefi
rstti
meinmyl i
feI’
m scaredofhim.

“
Whot
hef
ucki
sthatdudeal
lov
ery
ou?
”heasks.

“Idon'
thav
etoansweradamnthi
ng!Idon’
toweyouanexpl
anat
ion!
”headv
ancest
owar
dsme
unti
lmybacki
sagainstt
hewal
l
.Ifeelt
rapped.

“
Saythatagai
n!”hegr
owls.Ili
ftmychinup.I’
m notaboutt
obei
nti
midat
edbyhi
m.That
’smy
weaknessi
nli
fe.Il
aughatthefaceofdangerl
ikeSimba.

“
Isai
d..
.”Her
aiseshi
shandaboutt
odel
i
verasmack.Icl
osemyey
esandwai
tfort
hei
mpact
.

“
Iwoul
dn'tdothatifIwer
eyou.”OhmySazi
.Ohyes.Myinnerhoecl
aimedhi
mint
hati
nst
ant
.I
l
ookuptofindTsietsi
’
sarm st
il
lupi
ntheai
rhel
dinati
ghtgri
p.

“
Letgoofme!
”hei
sangr
y.

“Apologi
setothelady.”Heisascoolascucumberi
nSummer.Tsi
etsi
tri
estoforcehi
sarm out
ofhisgri
p.Sazit
wi st
si tandpl
acesi
tbehi
ndhisbacki
nanawkwardangle.Heisinpai
nnow.I
canseeitinhisf
ace.

“Isai
dapol
ogi
set
othel
ady
.”Thet
onei
sdeadl
yIf
eel
chi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.TheTOSi
sst
art
ing
tosweat
.

“
Iapol
ogi
seLona.
”Hesay
sthr
oughgr
it
tedt
eet
h.Ij
ustnodmyhead.Sazi
let
’sgoofhi
m.He
stepsawayfrom ustr
yingtoadj
usthi
sshoulder
.Withonewar
ningl
ookhewalksaway
.I’
m so
embarrassedri
ghtnow.Iturnawayfr
om Sazi
’sconcer
nedl
ookasIfeel
tear
spickl
emyeyes
andIfacethewalltohi
demyshame.

Ifeel
him mov
ingcl
oserbehi
ndme.Heist
ooclose.Mybodygoesfr
om bei
ngscar
edt
obei
ng
ashamedandthent
obeingarousedi
nani
nst
ant.Indl
alai
namanyal
a.

Theheatthatemanatesfrom hi
m spr
eadthr
oughoutmybody.Iplacemyf ol
dedarmsont he
wallandr
estmyf oreheadonthem.I’
mtooashamedofmyf eel
ingsrightnow.Ican’
tfacehim.
Hemov esevencloserunti
lhi
swholebodyisfl
ushedagai
nstmine.Ifeelmysel
fquiv
erf r
om
wit
hin.Hi
shandsslightl
yholdmywai st
.

“Lona.Areyouokay.”Hisvoi
cesoundsdeeperandsoft
er.Ionl
ynodmyhead.Hepl aceshi
s
handsont hewallj
ustabovemyheadandIf eelcagedi
n.Thefeel
ingi
sdeli
cious.Myquimis
throbbi
ngrealbadit
’sinsyncwit
htherapi
dthudofmyhear tbeat
.Hedipshi
sheadandIf eel
hishotbreat
hatthecr ookofmyneck.

“Lona.
”Thevi
brat
ionsf
rom t
hesoundofhi
svoi
ceagai
nstmyneckbr
eaksmywhol
ebodyi
nto
goosebumps.

“Lona.
”It’
salmostawhisperoraplea.ThenIfeeli
thisbul
geagai
nstmyass.Theonl
y
i
ndicati
onsincewemett hatIal
sohav ethesameeffectonhi
m.Fuck!Ial
mostcr
eam my
panti
es.Mybr eathi
ngst
artstoescal
ate.If
eelhi
swar m br
eat
hagai
nstmyneck.Ourbodi
esar
e
gluedtoeachot her
.

“
Lona.
”Thepl
eaagai
n.

“Mmh.”I
tcomesoutasabr eathymoan.Iwanthi
mtogr abmyboobsandsqueeze.Theyar
ein
pai
nandantici
pati
ngat ouch.Ever
ynervei
nmybodyi sstrungsot
ight
.Onekissfr
om hi
mI
woulddi
sint
egrat
e.Theheati nmyhiddencor
einunbearableandi
t’
salmostpai
nful
.Isl
i
ght
ly
pushmyassbackwar dsandr ubagai
nsthi
m.

“
Lona.
”It
’sl
i
keawar
ningt
hist
ime
“
Mh.
”Anot
hermoan.Takeme!Myi
nnerhoescr
eams.

“
Don’tdothat.
”Hesaysagainstmyear.I
’
mt oocl
osetomyclimax.Ineedjustonemorepush.I
wanthimtorollmysweaterupandpullmypanti
estothesi
detheninser
tshimself
.Iwantt
o
f
eelhim st
ret
chmyinnerwallsal
lthewaytomywomb.ThenIwanthi mt opoundmesenseless
r
ightt
hisagai
nstthi
swall
.Amoanescapesmymout h.

“
Fuck!
”Icanbar
elyhearasheswear
s.

“
Sazi
.”I
t’
sneedy
.Hecomesev
encl
oserandbl
owsagai
nstmyear
.

“Mmm. ”I’
m soclose.Hemov eshi
shandstohol
dmej ustbel
owmyarmsandIfeelhi
sfi
nger
s
grazethesidesofboobs.That’
sal
lIneededt
ofal
laparti
nhisar
msandhaveanorgasm.
Quietl
yso.Iwarnedyou.I’
m ahoe.

“
FuckLona.”Hehol
dshi
sbodytightagai
nstmineasIri
demywav
e.Thi
sispr
obabl
ythecl
osest
wewil
leverbetobei
ngi
nti
mate.Wear ei
nthatposi
ti
onforaf
ewminut
es.

“
Wehav
etogo.
”Hesay
s.Icanst
il
lfeel
hisbul
geagai
nstmyass.

“
I’
m sor
ry.
”If
eel
theneedt
oapol
ogi
se.

“Noneed.Ishouldbetheonesorr
y.”I
’
m notsur
eforwhat
.Hestepsbackandgent
lyt
urnsme
aroundt
of acehim.Ican’
tevenl
ookathi
m.WhodoeswhatIjustdidt
hough.If
eelhi
sfi
nger
l
ift
smychi ntolookathim.

“
It
’snotasbadasy
out
hinki
tis.
”Ionl
ynod.

“Areyouokayt
ogoback?
”Idon’
tthi
nkI
’
llbeabl
etosi
tamongstt
hosepeopl
eaf
terwhatj
ust
happened.

“
Doy
oumi
ndi
fIcal
li
tani
ght
?”
“
NoIdon’t
.”Het
akesouthisphoneanddial
ssomeone.Wearel
ookingateachotherashe
wai
tsfort
heper
sontopickup.Mybodyissti
ll
hummingwit
hpleasurebuti
t’
ssti
l
l nowher
enear
f
ulf
il
ment.

“Shont
wana.I
’
mtaki
ngLonahome.Wi l
lyoubeal
right
?Nodon’twor
ry.I
’
llsendmydr
ivert
o
comepicky
ouup.NoI’
m notsendi
ngaspy.Cool
.Sharp.
”Hehangsup.

“
Whydon’
tIor
deranUber
.”Hel
ooksatmel
i
keIhav
ejustgr
ownhor
ns.

“
Ungazodl
alawena.Let
’sgo.
”

“Wai
t.Il
eftmybagi
nsi
de.
”Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tfeel
li
kegoi
ngbacki
n.

“Comewi thme.Ican’tleav
eyououtherebyyour
self.
”Wewalkbackinside.Heleavesmeby
thefoyerwit
hthesecur i
tydet
ail
.Afewminut
eslaterhei
sbackwithmycl utchbackandwe
walktowardsthecar.Justasheisaboutt
oopenmydoorIhearadi st
inctclickbehi
ndus.Hi
s
enti
rebodyfreezes.Minestar
tsshaki
ng.

“
Youar
enott
aki
ngmywi
feany
wher
e.”Hay
ikeSpawnofSat
an!Het
rul
yhasupgr
aded.

“Youmeanex-
wif
e?”whyi
sSazi
sochi
l
led?Wehav
eagunpoi
ntedatus.Whydoesheev
en
haveagun?

“
Lona.St
epawayfrom t
hatcar
.”TheTOSshout
s.JustasI
’
m aboutt
omov
eSazi
hol
dsmest
il
l.
Hasn’
theev
erreadsaf
ety101?Obeymanwithagun.

“Getinthecar
.”Justliket hatheisnotnextt
ome.Ihearsoundsoffl
eshagainstfl
eshwit
ha
fewgrunti
ngandscr eaming.Isnapoutofmyr ev
eri
eandscrambl
eintothecar.OnceI’
minwi
th
adoorclosedonl
yt henIl ookbackandIf i
ndSazicr
ouchingont
hegroundandhol di
ngupa
faceofaseeminglylif
elessTsi et
si.Hei
ssayingsomet
hingtohi
m butIcan’
thearwhat.

Ther
ear
eaf
ewofhi
sfr
iendsal
sol
yi
ngont
hegr
oundgr
unt
ingi
npai
n.I
’
mli
ter
all
yshaki
ng.
Saziget
supandwalkstothecar.Hedoesn'tevenhaveascrat
chany
wher
e.Oncehei
sinsi
de
thecarhel
ooksatmeintent
lyandthenabruptl
ystart
sthecar.

“
Ishedead?”i
tcomesoutasasquawk.I
’
mter
ri
fi
edr
ightnow.Funnyenoughnotoft
heman
whojustdi
dal
lthatdamage.

“
He’
l
lli
ve.
”Wedr
ivei
nsi
l
encef
orawhi
l
ethenInot
icehei
snotgoi
ngmydi
rect
ion.

“
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
”

“
LonaIt
hinky
ourhusbandmi
ghtf
oll
owy
ouhomeorsendoneofhi
sgoons.
”

“
Tsi
etsi
woul
dnev
erhur
tme.
”Thatsoundeddumbt
hemomenti
tcameout
.

“HehasagunandIt
hinkhei
sabi
tunhi
nged.Aguywhodoesn'
ttaker
eject
ionv
erywel
lcanbe
danger
ousLona.
”

“
Soyout
hinkmaki
ngdeci
sionsf
ormei
sokay
?”Iseehi
sjawcl
ench.I
’
m notadamsel
.Hehas
t
oknow.

“No.I
tisn’
t.Ishoul
dhav
easkedy
ouf
ir
st.I
’
m sor
ry.
”Woa.Thateasyhuh!

“I
t’
sfi
ne.Wherear
eyoutaki
ngme?”Imustadmi
tIwaswor
ri
edaswel
laboutTsi
etsi
.Imayhav
e
under
esti
matedhi
sstat
eofmind.

“
Mypent
house.
”What
!

“Wher
eisy
ourwi
fe?
”

“
Atourhouseact
ual
l
ycur
rent
lyshei
sawayonbusi
ness.
”
“
Whydoy
ouhav
easepar
atepent
house?
”

“
Formyper
sonal
space.
”I’
m conf
usedasf
uckbutIdon’
tquest
ionhi
mfur
ther
.

Wedrivet
owar dsBryanst
onintoaluxur
iousapar
tmentbui
ldi
ng.Thi
sguymustreal
l
ybel
oaded.
Weparkinthebasementandt akeanelevat
ortothel
astfl
oor.Westepouti
ntot
hemost
beaut
if
ulandluxur
iouslooki
nghallway.

Thewal l
sar eador
nedwithexpensi
veartworkt
hatar
eindeepr
ed,
orangeandbl
uecol
our
s.
Thatprovidesasplashofcol
ourontheoff-
whit
ewall
s.Ther
ear
eonlyf
ourdoor
sonthi
sfl
oor
thatcoul
dmeanonl yf
ourapart
ments.

Wewal kunt
ilt
helasttwointhecorner
.Heopenst hedoorandholdsi
topenforme.Iwal
kint
o
aglor
iousapartment.It
’sai
rybutdoesn’
tfeelcol
d.Bytheentr
ancether
earetwowingback
chai
rsfl
anki
nganant i
quetablet
hathasaant i
queboxont opwithamirr
orabovei
t.

Istandasideandwai tforhi mt oclosethedoorandl eadmei nside.Heput shiskeysont he

tableandIf oll
owhi mi ntotheapar tment.Thel oungear eahast wocomf ort
ablelookingcouches
offwhiteal otoflayeredcushi onsindifferentcompl ement arycol ours.Adarkwoodcof feet abl
e
i
nt hecentrewi thabeaut i
fulr
edandbl ackcent r
epi ece.Ther ear ealsotwodeepr edwi ngback
chairswithcream cushi ons.Theyar ebiggert hant heonesf rom t hef r
ontandmor ecomf ortabl
e.
Justbelow t hesil
verst aircasethereisadi ningt ablewi thit
ssi deser ver.I
t’
sglasst abl
et op
andsi l
verlegswi t
hheav ylookingchairsindifferentpat ternsandl egsthatmatcht hetable’s.
Thatleadst oahugeki tcheninwhi teandsi l
vercol ours.Ononesi dei sasli
dingdoort hatopens
toabal conybutIcan’ tseewhat ’
sont heout side.Ther ei salsoabarar eawithanot herseating
areathathast wobei geVi ctori
ancouches.Thi spl aceisbeaut i
ful andIloveit
.

“
Any
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”

“
Cof
feepl
ease.
”Idon’
twantanyal
cohol
.

“
Won’
titkeepy
ouup?
”

“NoIcanhandleit.
”Hedisappearstothekitchenwhi
leIsi
tint
heloungeandplacemyphone
andbagont hesidetabl
e.Idecidetotakeoffmybootsandmyf eetsi
nkontheplushthi
ck
carpet
.Iwanttotuckmyf eetundermeont hecouchbuthemightnotli
ket
hat.Thispl
acelooks
spotl
ess.Iwonderwhokeepsi tcl
ean.
“
Mil
kandsugar
?”hecal
l
sfr
om t
heki
tchen.

“
Yespl
ease.Twot
easpoonsofsugar
.”

Afewminutesl
aterhecomesbackwit
htwocupsandgi
vesmemine.Hepl
aceshi
sont
he
cof
feet
ableandthengoesupst
air
s.Hecomesbackwi
thathr
ow.

“
Here.Youcanputy ourfeetupandrelax.
”I’
m sorel
iev
ed.Ituckmyf eetundermeandusethe
t
hrowtocovermy self
.Hehast akenhisshoesoffashesit
soppositemewi t
hhisf
eetupon
t
hecouchaswell.West artchatt
ingaboutever
ythi
ngandany t
hing.

“
Whatdoyoudo?”Mycur
iosi
tyget
sthebestofme.Hel
eansbackandr
elaxeswi
thonear
m at
t
hebackofhi
shead.

“Iownacoupl eofcoalmines.Afewmallsaroundthecountr
yandacoupl eofbui
ldingsi
nafew
bigci
ti
es.Iboughtthem cheaprenov
atedandt ur
nedthealmostdebi
l
itat
ingareasinto
upmarketareas.”Whoa.That’
sthemostpersonalhehasgottensi
nceImethi m.Thedudeis
wealt
hy.Whatt hefuckdoeshewantfrom me?

“
That
’sal
ot.Whendi
dyouacqui
real
lthat
?”

“
Thr
oughbl
ood,
sweatandt
ear
s.”Iknowhewon'
tel
abor
ate.

“
Sowhatwoul
dyourwi
fesayabouty
ouhousi
ngmet
oni
ght
?”

“Tobehonest
.Ihav
en’
ttoldherabouti
tyetassheisaway
.I'
m notsur
ehowt
otel
lher
.Icoul
d
havebookedyouahot
elyouknowbutherey ouar
e.”

“
Ift
hisi
sgoi
ngt
obeapr
obl
em may
beIshoul
dleav
e.”Ofcour
sei
twi
l
lbeapr
obl
em.

“
Letmet
akecar
eoft
hat
.Youar
eher
eal
ready
.It
’sal
most3am.
”
“
Okay
.I’
l
lst
aybutt
obehonestt
hisi
swei
rd.
”

“
Iknow.Ireall
yenj
oyy
ourcompanyLona.Youar
epur
eandt
her
eist
hisi
nnocenceabouty
ou.
I
t’
sref
reshing.
”

“
Real
l
y.Youmakei
tsoundasi
fyouar
eol
d.”

“
I’
m ol
dert
hany
out
hat
'sf
orsur
e.”

“
Howol
dar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m 32andy
ouar
e26.
”Hesqui
ntshi
sey
esandpur
sehi
sli
ps.

“
Howdi
dyouknow?
”I’
m shocked.

“
Aluckyguess.
”Hesmi
l
es.Weshoul
dpayhi
mforhi
ssmi
l
es.

Wechatunt
ilI
’myawni
ngnonst
op.Het
akest
hecupsgot
otheki
tchenandIdeci
det
orestabi
t
asIwr
apmy sel
fwit
hthethr
ow.

Iwakeupsi nki
ngi nt
oaf l
uffycloud.Isli
ghtlyopenmyey esandf i
ndmy sel
fi n-betweenEgy pti
an
cottonsheetswithafluf
fywhitecomf or t
er.Thi
sisahugebedandI ’
ml yi
ngr ightinthecentre.
It
’sanequallyhugebedroom.I t
’sdark.Isupposet hecurtai
nsareverythi
ck.I tdawnsonme
thatI’
minast rangebedroom.Idoabi tofKegelsjustt
omakesur eIwasn'trav aged.Thereare
sti
llcobwebsdownt here.Pit
y.ThenIpeakundert heblanket.I
’
m onlywearingbl acklace
pantieswit
hast rapl
essblacklacecor set.Mywigissti
llonmyhead.Smal lmer cies.

Igetoffthebedandwal ktowardswhatIassumei sabathroom.If i

ndat oi
letseparatefr
om the
bathr
oom.OnceI ’
m donerel
ievi
ngmyselfIgointothebathroom andf i
ndasealedt oothbrush
ontopoft hevanit
ycabinet
.Myupperarm hasgr eenbrui
sesandt heyf eelpai
nful
.Thisbrings
backlastnightunpl
easantmemor i
es.Ifi
nishbrushingmyteeth,fi
xmywi gandIfindaf l
uffy
robehangingbehindthedoor.Iweart
hatandwal kbackintothebedr oom tofi
ndSazi opening
thecur
tai
ns.Heremindsmeofonepart
icul
arpl
easur
abl
emomentwhi
chIhav
echosent
obl
ock
outofmymi nd.I
t’
sforhi
ssaf
etyr
eal
ly
.

I
tseemsl
i
kei
t’
swaypassmor
ningal
ready
.Hei
swear
ingsweat
pant
sandav
est
.

“
Goodmor
ning.
”Hegr
eet
s.

“Morni
ng.
”Irespondt
ight
eni
ngthebeltaroundme.Isuddenl
yfeel
selfconsci
ousthathehas
seenmehalfnakedandhepossi
blecarri
edmeupt othebedroom.Icri
ngethi
nki
ngaboutthat
mammot htask.Hemustbereal
l
ystrong.

“
Ibr
oughty
ouacupofcof
fee.
”Hepoi
ntst
othest
eami
ngcupont
hepedest
al.

“Thankyou.”Igoandpickupthecupandtakeasip.JustthewayIl
ikei
t.Ican’
thel
pbutcl
ose
myey esasIsavourthetast
e.Wearebothsti
ll
standing.Heisl
eani
ngagainstt
hewall
withhi
s
armsf ol
ded.

“
Howdi
dyousl
eep?
”

“Ver
ywel l
thankyou.Thi
sbedi
stoocomf
ortabl
e.”Ir
espondlooki
ngathi
m overt
heri
m ofthe
cup.“HowdidIgetint
obedandwhoundr
essedme? ”Ibl
urti
toutbef
orethi
nki
ngabouti
t.He
smirks.

“Ifoundyoupassedoutonthecouch.It
ri
edwakingyouupbuty ouwouldn’
tbudgesoIcar
ri
ed
youtobed.Undressi
ng,
well
..
.”myeyeswiden. “Tobefai
rIthoughtyouhadsomet hi
ng
underneat
hthesweater
.Imaginemysurpr
isewhenIfi
ndonlylaceandskin.
”Icanfeelmyf
ace
heati
ngup.Ilookaway.

“Nothi
ngtobeembar r
assedaboutLona.Imadebr eakfast
.Comejoinme.”Hewal ksout.I
decidetomakethebedandI ’m notsurewhattowearsoIr emaini
nsidetherobe.If
indhim
sit
ti
ngonthehugebal cony,atablesetupwi t
hbreakfastandanot
herteatrol
leyontheside
withvar
iet
yoffoods.Ifeell
i
keI’m athotel
rightnow.
“
Thi
sisbeaut
if
ul.Somuchf
oodf
orj
ustt
wopeopl
e.”Isay
.

“Idi
dn’tknowwhatyouwouldpref
ersoImadeabitofev
eryt
hing.
”Idon'
tcar
eaboutt
hecer
eal
andstuffIgost
rai
ghtforthegr
easyl
ot.Il
ovef
oodandIdon’
tholdback.Weenj
oyour
breakf
astoverl
ightchat
ter.

“Ihav
et ogohome.Thekidswillbeget
ti
ngback,
”Isayhour
slateraf
terbreakf
ast
.I’
mrel
uct
ant
topartwayswit
hhim especi
all
ybecauseIhav
eaf eel
i
ngitmightbethelastti
meweseeeach
other
.

“Iknow.
”That'
sallhesay
s.Igetuptogetmybag.I
’
m st
il
li
nlastni
ghtout
fi
tbutIsmel
ll
ikehi
m.
Iusedhi
stoil
etr
ieswhenIshowered.

Hedrivesmehomei
nsi
l
ence.Whenwegett
her
ehei
nsi
stsonchecki
ngt
hehouseout
.Hef
inds
not
hing.

“
I’
m worr
iedaboutl
eav
ingy
oual
oneher
e,”Hesay
s.Wear
est
andi
ngi
nthemi
ddl
eofmyempt
y
l
ounge.

“I
’
llbef
ine.
”

“
Howwel
ldoy
ouknowy
ourexhusband?
”Af
terl
astni
ghtnotwel
lenough.

“It
houghtIknewhi
m butheshockedmel
astni
ght
.”Het
akesoutabusi
nesscar
doutofhi
s
pocket
.

“Li
stenifhetr
iesanyt
hingcal
lme.
”Hegiv
esmet
hecar
d.S.
K.Consor
ti
um.I
thasdi
ff
erentway
s
ofcontacti
nghimincl
udingawebsi
te.

“
Thanky
ou.
”

“Youmightwantt
othinkofrepor
ti
nghi
mforhar
assment
.Nott
hatpol
i
cewi
l
lhel
pyouwi
th
anyt
hingbutt
ohaveitonrecord.
”
“I’
l
l dot
hat.
”Myhearti
sheavyalr
eady
.Ubuf
ebebodwa.Thi
sissomeone’
shusband.Iwal
khi
m
out.Wearestandi
ngbythegat
e.

“
ByeLona.
”

“ByeSazi
.”Justl
i
ket
hathei
sgone.Ir
etur
ntot
hehouseandcooksupperwhi
l
eIwai
tfort
he
kids.

I
t’
saf ewhour
slaterwhenTsi
etsi
’
ssi
sterbri
ngst
heki
dsback.I
'
m gr
atef
ult
hati
t’
snott
heTOS
becauseI
’
m notsurehowIwould'
ver
eacted.

“
Keepy
ourt
hugboy
fri
endawayf
rom mybr
other
,”shesay
s.

“
Theonl
ythugher
eisy
ourbr
other
.Di
dshet
ell
youwhathedi
d?”

“
Justkeephi
m away.I’
m sogladhei
sf i
ghti
ngforcust
odysothatwedon’
thav
etodeal
wit
h
y
ou.Mmewasr ightaboutyou.
”Tyhi
ninkosi
yam!Ndiyal
ingwast
ru.

“
Ausi
we.Getoutofmyhousepl
ease.
”

“Yourhouse!Notforlong.
”Iseemykidsi
nthethecornerofmyey eter
ri
fi
ed.Ideci
detoignor
e
thecommentandnotf uelt
hisar
gumentanyf
urther
.Iholdthedooropenforhertol
eave.She
getsthehintandgetsout.

“
Heybabi
es.I
’
vemi
ssedy
ousomuch.
”Icanseet
heyar
eabi
tappr
ehensi
vet
oappr
oachme.

“Mommywhydi dyouhav
edaddybeat
en?”Khot
hatsoasks.I’
m doneshi
eldi
ngthesonofa
bit
ch.Li
ter
all
y.Howcanhet hr
owmeunderthebusli
kethis?Ever
ytimethekidsv
isi
thi
mthey
havetobepoisonedagai
nstme.

“
Comesi
twi
thme.
”Wegosi
tont
hebeanbags.
“Lastnighty ourf
at herhadagunpoi
ntedinmommy ’
sheadwithafewofhisfri
end.Iwas
terr
if
iedandmyf riendcamet omyrescue.
”Iseethefeari
nthei
reyes.I
tmightnothavebeena
goodi deatot el
lthem.WhatdoIdowhenheconst ant
lybadmouthmewi t
hthekids?Hei s
fi
ghtingdirtyandIdon’ tli
kei
t.“Myf
riendwastr
yingtohelpmommy .Youunderst
and.”They
nodt heirheads.

“Wewill
befinemyloves.Thi
sisbet
weenmeandy ourf
ather
.Webothst
il
ll
ovey
ouver
ymuch.
Ial
sothinky
ourfat
herwasnothimselfwhenhedi
dthat
.”Thebot
hjumponmeandgiv
emea
hug.

“
YouknowIl
ovey
our
ight
?”

“
Yesmommy
.Wel
ovey
out
oo.
”Theysayi
nuni
son.

“
Okwho'
sgoi
ngt
ohel
pmedi
shup?
”

“
Me.
”

“
Me.
”

“
Okaybot
hofy
oucanhel
p.Come.
”Al
li
swel
l
.Fort
hemomentany
way
.

Aft
ersuppermygi r
lshel
pwi t
hthedi
shesev
ent
hought
heymakemor
eoft
hemess.Af
ter
bat
hingthem Isendthem t
obed.

I
nmyr oom Ipr
epareformyf i
rstdayatwor
kfort
omorr
ow.I’
mv er
yanxi
ousabouti
tIwon'tl
i
ke.
Whil
elayi
nginbedIthinkofLala.I
t’
ssoweir
dtogol
ongerper
iodoft
imewit
houtspeaki
ngto
her
.Ideci
detocall
her.

“
Choma.
”

“
HeyLal
ahowar
eyou?
”
“I
’
m goodChoma.How ar
eyou?Ar
eyour
eadyf
ory
ourf
ir
stday
?”

“
Iam.Anxi
ousbutl
ooki
ngf
orwar
dtoi
t.Lal
aar
eyouokay
?”

“
JaI
’
mfi
ne.Whydoy
ouask?
”

“YouknowI ’
m hereforyouright.Iknowthepastt
hreeyearshav ebeenaboutmeandTsietsi
’
s
i
ssues.Ihaven’tt
akenti
met ositandhearaboutyourt
roubles.Evenyoursuccess.I
’
vebeena
badfri
end.”Ihearasnif
f.“Lala.Talktome.”

“
I’
mf i
neLona.I’
m gladIhaveyoui
nmycor
ner
.Goodl
uckf
ort
omor
row.Maybewecanhav
e
l
unchonSaturdaytocelebr
ate.
”

“
I'
dlov
ethat
.Goodni
ghtChoma.
”Wehangup.

ItakeSazi
’scar
dandlookati
t.I
’m goi
ngtoneedhishel
p.It
’st
imeIswallowedmypr i
deand
askedforhel
p.Ishoul
d'
vegonetothefami
lycour
tbutthatwould’
vebeenaprocess.Ineeda
shrewdlawyert
odealwit
hTsiet
sionceandforal
l
.Ihaveunderest
imatedhim bef
ore,I
'
m not
abouttodothatagai
n.

Chapt
er6

“
Nowandt
heny
oumi
ssi
t,soundsmakey
oucr
y

Someni
ght
syoudancewi
tht
ear
siny
ourey
es

Icamet
ovi
sitcausey
ouseemel
i
keaUFO

That
'sl
i
kenev
ercauseImadey
ouusey
oursel
fcont
rol

Andy
oumademel
osemysel
fcont
rol
,mysel
fcont
rol
”-Fr
ankOcean

Thefoll
owingmorni
ngIdropthekidsoffatdaycarebeforeseventobeatthetraf
fictoRivoni
a.
Iarr
iveatworkbef
ore8am.Nooneel seisherei
nt herecept
ionarea.Ihadhopedt ofi
ndFisiwe
i
n.I’
m notsurehowtoproceed.Af
terabout10minutesofint
ernalargumentIdecidetogo
knockonmyboss’soffi
ce.Ihearafai
ntcomein.Ihopeshesaidcomei nbecauseI’m goi
ngin.
Ican’
treal
l
ymakeitout
.Sheisalreadybusygoi
ngt
hroughsomef
il
es.Shel
ooksupi
nti
measI
enter
.Shewear
sreadi
ngglasses.Cute.

“
Goodmor
ningMsNduna.
”Ist
andawkwar
dlybyt
hedoor
.

“
Mor
ningMsSoml
otha.Youar
eher
eear
ly.Ver
yimpr
essi
vef
ory
ourf
ir
stday
.”

“Thankyou.I
sther
eany
thi
ngIcandof
ory
ou?
”Shepausesandl
ooksatmel
i
keshei
sthi
nki
ng
aboutit
.

“Nonoty et
.Gomakey oursel
fsomecof feeandrel
ax.I’
l
lcal
lyouinafteranhourt odiscussyour
contract
.Thekit
chenist oyourlef
twheny oucomeoutsameast herestarea, boardroomsand
bathrooms.Ontherightyoufindothermanagersoffi
ces,Fi
nance,Marketi
ng, PR, Pr
ocurement
etc.Thei
rPA’sarestati
onedinf r
ontoftheirof
fi
ces.Youcanintr
oducey ourself.Yourdeskifby
Fisi
we.Sheisthereceptioni
stforthi
sfl
oor.TherestI’
l
lbri
efyouonlater.”

“
Alr
ightMsNduna.Woul
dyoul
i
kesomecof
feeaswel
l
?”

“Thanky oubutI’
l
lwaitforMmeMi nahtocomeint henshecanshowy ouhowmycof f
eeis
done.Sheisourtealadyont hi
sfl
oor.Ifyouwanttopreparerefr
eshment sformeet
ingsshe
takescareofthat
.It
’spartofherduti
es.Ther
earetwocl eanersforthi
sf l
ooraswel
l
.I’
ll
i
ntroduceyouwhent heycomei n.
”Inodmyunder standi
ngandl eftheroffi
ce.

Ifi
ndthekit
chenandmakemy sel
facupofcof
fee.Therearesomecupsthataredi
ff
erentfr
om
theot
hersandIassumetheybelongt
oindi
vi
dualsandthentherei
sasetofcoffeemugs.Iuse
oneofthose.OncedoneIgobacktother
ecept
ionarea.Isi
tontheemptytabl
enexttoFisi
we’s.

AssoonasIfi
nishmycuppeopl
estar
tcomi
ngin.WhenIcheckt
heti
meit
’sj
ustaft
er8h30.I
guesst
hisi
sthetimef
orever
yonet
oclocki
n.Fi
siweal
socomesinwit
hever
yone.

“
Mor
ning.Ear
lybi
rdIl
i
ke.
”Shegr
eet
s.

“
HeyFi
fi
.Howar
eyou?
”
“
Sohungov
erI
t’
snotev
enf
unny
.”Webot
hlaugh.

“
Youar
ebr
avert
hanme,
dri
nki
ngonaSundaywi
thwor
kthef
oll
owi
ngday
.Iwoul
dn’
tsur
viv
eit
.”

Assoonassheset t
lesinshegoesandget
sher
sel
facupofcoffee.Shecomesbackwit
hMme
Minnahandint
roduceshertome.Av er
yni
cel
ooki
ngol
dlady.Thenaf ewminut
eslat
erI
’m
i
ntroducedt
othecleaners.

Fi
siwe’
sphonebuzzesandshepicksup.Af
ter
war
dsshet
ell
smet
hatMsNdunawant
stosee
me.Iwalkt
oheroffi
cewit
hbutterf
li
esinmytummy.

“MsSomlotha,
takeaseat
,”shealway
ssaysmynameasi
fshei
sseei
ngmef
ort
hef
ir
stt
ime.I
si
topposi
teherandfi
ghtt
heur getof
idget
.

“
Youcancal
lmeLonamam.
”Shel
ooksupasi
fsur
pri
sedbymyr
esponse.

“
Onl
ywheny
oucal
lmeMonde.
”

“
It
’sabi
tst
ranget
ocal
lmybossbyherf
ir
stname.
”Igi
ggl
e.Umhl
ola.

“It
’smynamer ight?Any wayi t’
snotamust .Hereisy ourcont
ract.Got hroughi tandhav eit
signedwi thi
ntwoday s.Ifyouarenotclearaboutany thi
ngcomebackt ome. ”Shepassest he
contracttome.“ Lookont hesecondpage.That ’
sy oursalar
ywhiley ouar eonpr obati
onand
thent henextlinewi llbey oursalar
ywhenwemakey ouper manent.”Myey esnear lypopoutof
mysocket s.Iwasn’ texpect i
ngtoear nthismuch.Itfeelssurreal
.Thebenef it
st hatcomewi th
thispackagear easal aryontheirown.Mywor d.I’
m shook.Icanf inal
lyhav emedi calai
dformy
kids.Asmuchasshehadt oldmet ogoov eri
tonmyown.Shest i
l
l t
akest imet ogoov eri
twith
me.I ’
m happywi thitalreadybutI ’
l
ltakeithomej ustt omakesureIunder standt hef i
nepri
nt.
Nott hatthereisany .I’mt ryi
ngtolookpr operhere.

Af
terwar
dssheshowsmeallherf
il
esinaccor
dancetothei
rimpor
tance.I
nheroff
icet
her
eare
moreconfi
dent
ial
document
sandthenotherf
il
eswil
lbeonthecabinetat
tachedt
omydesk.
Oncewehavecover
edmostofmydaytodayacti
vit
ieswhi
chtakesthewhol
eMor
ning,
she
or
dersl
unch.OhbythewayI
’
mincl
udedinthat
.I’
m goingt
oloveither
e.

“Ihaveameet ingat3pm.Fi
siwewillhelpyousetupboar droom A.I
’l
lneedy
ouguy
st osetup
foraconferencecall
aswell
.”Justt
henourl uncharri
ves.Shegivesmecashtot
ipthedeli
ver
y
guy.Apparentl
ytherest
aur
antrunsat abfortheoff
ice.Thisist
helif
e.

Wesetupont heothersi
dewher ethereisaseatingareawithacoffeetable.I
’mt oonervousto
evenchew.Sheseemsabi trel
axedsounl ikeher
.Shei sweari
ngabl ackpinstr
ipedsui t
.Pant
s
arehi
ghwaistandtheblouseisdar kbluewitharuff
ledneckandt uckedin.Thej acketi
soff
andhangingoverthecoathanger.Shehasabl ackstil
ett
oheelon.Signaturehairstyl
e,
eyebr
owsonf l
eekanddeepr edli
pstick.Theli
psti
ckmakesherl i
pslookbi gger.

“
Howl
ongwer
eyoumar
ri
edf
or?
”sheasks.

“Foral
most5y ear
s.”Herey
eswi
den.I
’
m sur
eshemustt
hinkI
’
mtoonai
vet
ogetmar
ri
edat
suchay oungage.

“
Anyki
ds?
”

“Yes.Two.Khothat
sois5andNt
hanti
sii
s3.Thoset
woaremyheart.
”Shegiv
esmeasmal
l
smile.Iwantt
oaskifshei
smarr
iedorhaski
dsbutt
hatmightj
ustbetoof
orwar
d.

“
Theyar
est
il
lyoungt
hough.Ar
eyousur
etheywon'
ti
nter
fer
ewi
thy
ourj
ob?
”

“Theyareatday-
carewhichhasaftercar
easwell
.ButIthink,I
'
m goi
ngtolookforanannysoon.
Imightbetaki
ngtheirfat
hertocourtassoonasIcanaffordagoodlawyer.ThatmeansIneed
someonemor erel
iabletolookaf
terthem.”WhyI
’m say
ingt hi
smuchisbeyondme.Isuddenly
havemout hdi
arr
hoea.

“
Whyareyoutakinghimtocourt
.Isn'tyourdi
vor
cef
inal
i
sed?
”concer
niset
chedonherf
ace.
Wow.Shecandisplayemot
ion.I
’
mt ouched.
“
Hehasnotbeenpay
ingmai
ntenance.Icoul
dli
vewi
tht
hatwi
thmynewj
ob.
..
”

“Youshoul
dn'
thav
etoli
vewi
tht
hatLona.Hehasar
esponsi
bil
i
tyasaf
athert
omai
ntai
nhi
s
kids.
”Shecut
smeoff.

“Ja.Iknow.Itget
swor se.Hehasn'
tbeenpayingforthehouseaswel
l.Thebankisdemanding
payment .Theworstparti
sthathei
sstil
lstal
kingmeandget t
ingv
iol
ent.OnSatur
dayIwasout
withaf r
iendandhemanhandl edmeandt henpoint
edaguni nmyhead.”Hereyeswiden.

“Getarestrai
ningor
deragai
nsthim.Repor
tever
ysingl
einci
dentnomatterhowtr
ivi
al.Di
dhe
hurty
ou? ”Ikeepqui
et.Shelov
estotakechar
ge.RemindsmeofSazi.Isquasht
hatthoughtas
soonasitspr out
sit
suglyhead.

“
Lona,
didhehur
tyou?
”herv
oicei
sst
ernl
i
keamot
herr
epr
imandi
ngherchi
l
d.

“
It
sjustabr
uiseonmyar
m.”I
'
m abitembarr
assedr
ightnow.Onmyf
ir
stdayatwor
kal
ready
I
'
mt el
li
ngmybossofmydomest
icaff
air
s.

“Letmesee.
”What
.Herey
eswiden.Shei
snotj
oki
ng.Goodt
hingt
heyar
einmyar
m.Ir
oll
up
mysleev
eandshowhermybr
uise.

“Fuck!Thislookspai
nful
.”Shetouchesmyarm andlooksatmybrui
se.Herhandsaresof
tand
del
icat
e.War mthspreadsthr
oughoutmyarm.Shei sverycl
oset
omer ightnow.Icanf
eelher
warm breathfanni
ngmyar m.Thensheabrupt
lylet
sgoofmyar m.

“Youneedt oreporthim.”Ij
ustnodmyhead.Sheget
supandgoestoherdesk.Comesback
withabusinesscar d.“
Here.Thi
sisagoodfri
endofminecal
lhi
m.Hei
sal awyer.
”It
akethe
cardandlookati t
.Looksl i
keanexpensi
vel
awyert
ome.

“
Okay
.Thanky
ou.
”Ican’
taf
for
dal
awy
er.I
t'
smyf
ir
stdayatwor
k.

“
Lona.Hedoespr
obonowor
kal
lthet
ime.Shoul
dIspeakt
ohi
mfory
ou?
”
“
Real
l
y!I
’
dappr
eci
atet
hat
.”

“Good.I
’dsuggestaft
erthemeeti
ngyougoreportt
his,”shepoi
ntatmyarm.“Icanal
socalla
poli
ceguyIknowt ohelpspeedupthepr
ocess.
”Shei sbusyonherphoneasshespeaks.I
sshe
mafiaorsomething.I
t’
sli
kesheknowsaguyev er
ywher e.

“
Okay
.Thanky
ouMonde.
”Shepausesandl
ooksup.Sheseemssur
pri
sed.

“I
t’
sapleasur
e.”Ourey
eslockf
oraf
ewasecondsmor
ethannecessar
y.I
’
mthef
ir
stt
olook
awayandclearthet
abl
e.

“Sheget
supaswel
landgobackt
oherdesk.

“Ij
ustsentGregamessage.Callhi
m.”Gregist
helawyer.Aft
erI’
m donewi
ththecl
eari
ngup,
I
l
eavetheoffi
ce.Fi
siweandIgetbusyinprepar
ingt
heboar dr
oom.Sheshowsmewhatt odo
andwhot ocal
lforhel
p.I
tsnot
hinghecti
c.SomeofthethingsIsti
ll
remembertodo.

Mondet el
lsmet hatImustsitt
hroughthemeet i
ngtorecor
dt hemi nutes.I
tispar tofmyjob
aft
erall
.Okayshedoesn’ tmenti
onthelastpart
.Sheismeetingwi t
ht heexecuti
v esandonei s
onSkype.Seeingthiswomani nherel
ementi sadream.Sheisi ncharger i
ghtnowandexudes
power.Icanseeev enthegentl
emenshei swithareabiti
nti
mi dat
edbyher .I
’mimpr essed.
Whenshesi t
sandl eansbackonherchair.I
tfeelsl
ikeyouareaddressi ngthepresident.

I
t’
stwohour
slat
erwhent
hemeet
ingi
sadj
our
ned.Thet
wogent
lemenst
andt
oleav
e.

TheoneonSky pel
ogsoff
.Icanseeoneoft hegentl
ementry
ingt
omakeamov eonMonde
andshedi
smisseshi
m soswift
lyandeff
ectivel
y.Hewal
ksoutwit
hat ai
lbet
weenhisl
eg.What
washethi
nki
ng?Ipackuptheboardroom andcleart
hecupsandgl
asses.

“
Someonewillcomeanddothat.
”Ilookupandfindherpacki
ngherowndocument
s.“Here,
fil
e
t
hisf
orme.”Iwalkuptoherandtakethef
il
e.Therei
ssomet hi
ngaboutt
hewayshelooksat
methatmakesmeawar eofmyselfasawoman.Asexywoman.I t’
sweir
d.

“
Arewedoneher
e?Not
hingel
sey
ouneedmef
or?
”Iask.
“
No.Got
othepol
i
cest
ati
on.Adet
ect
iveNj
okweni
wil
lbewai
ti
ngf
ory
ou.
”

“
Hewon'
tmi
ndt
hatIl
i
vei
nBedf
ordVi
ew?
”

“Gospeaktohim.He’l
lknowwhattodo.Heisexpect
ingyou.
”Iguesst
hatwrapsmyday.She
takesherl
aptopbagandwalksbacktoherof
fi
ce.Ideci
detogodosomef i
li
ngandthengo
home.Isti
llf
indFi
siweatherdesk.

“
Beenwai
tingf
ory
ouguy
stof
ini
sh.Yourmeet
ingt
ookf
orev
er.
”Shemakesadr
amat
icf
ace.I
l
i
keheral
ready
.

“
Whyar
eyoust
il
lher
e?“I
twasj
ustaf
ter5pm.

“
Iwasn’
tsur
eify
ouwoul
dneedany
thi
ng.I
’
m onmywayt
hough.Andy
ou?
”

“
Letmef
il
ethesequi
ck.
”Shewai
tsf
ormewhi
l
eIdo.

“
Howwasy
ourf
ir
stday
?”

“
Itwasgood.
”

“
Real
l
y!”

“Don’tbesoshocked.Ithi
nkI’
m goingtoenjoymy sel
fhere.”Sheseemsmor eshockedwith
thatstatementbutdoesn’
tsayanythi
ng.Afterf
il
ingthedocument stherewasonethatneeded
togot oMonde’soffi
cefil
i
ngcabinet.Iwal
ktoherof f
ice.Knockonceandopen.Shei sonthe
phonef aci
ngthewindow.Ifi
lewhatIneedtoandasIt urnIfi
ndherlookingatme.

“
Ineededt
ofi
l
eonedocumenther
e,”Igi
veanunnecessar
yexpl
anat
ion.
“Det
ectiv
eNjokweni
isexpecti
ngyou.Don’
tchi
ckenoutdo,
thi
s.I
fyoudon’
tyourexwi
l
lwal
kal
l
overyou.Pl
usyouneedevidence.
”

“Iwil
l
, t
hanky ouonceagain.
”Shejustsmilesandgoesbacktoherl
apt
op.IsupposeI
’
m
dismissed.IgooutandfindFisi
wealreadyonherf
eet.Shei
sreadyt
ogo.

“
Youwanttobecomeli
keyourbossandstayher
eaf
terhour
s?Mhm babenotme.Ihav
epl
aces
t
obelet
’sgo.
”Itakemybagandmycontractandweleav
e.

“
Doesn'
tshehav
eahusbandwai
ti
ngf
orherathome?
”IaskFi
siwe

“
Yourboss?Hel
lno.Idon’
tev
ent
hinkshel
i
kesmen.Mi
ghtaswel
lbemar
ri
edt
oherj
ob.
”

“
Isshel
esbi
an?
”

“Idon’
tt hi
nkso.Neverseenherwi
thawomanei
ther
.Shei
sjustnotapeople’
sperson.
”Idon’
t
feelr
ightgossipi
ngaboutMonde.Shemi
ghtbededi
cat
edtoherjobbutIdon’
tthi
nksheisa
badper son.

“Ithinkbehindthathardex teri
orther
eisasof ty.
”Justthi
nkingaboutwhatshej ustdi
dforme
bringswar mtht omyhear t.Yeah,sheisasof ty.Whenwegett otheparkingl
otwegoour
separ ateways.Myf ir
ststopi swithdetect
iveNj okweniwhoi ndeedhasbeenexpect i
ngme.He
takesmyst at
ementandpi cturesofthebruises.Het el
lsmenott oleaveanyt
hingbehind.Iev
en
tel
l him aboutt
heni ghtIfoundt heTOSi nmybed.Headv i
sesmet ospeaktomyl awyerandget
ar estrai
ningorderagainsthim.WhenI ’m donewi ththedetecti
veit’
salmost7pm.Thedaycar e
char gesR50af ter6pm.Imi ghthavetoconsi derfi
ndinganannyaswel l.

Ifi
rstbuyt
akeawayandt
henfetchtheki
ds.Theycompl
ainnonst
opaboutbei
ngf
etchedl
ate.
Jonathanwasl
onggoneappar
entl
y.Heismychild'
scl
ockthi
sJonat
han.

Aft
ersupperIbathethem andt
akethem t
obed.Backinmyr
oom It
hinkaboutcal
l
ingthe
l
awy erbuti
t’
stoolat
ei nt
heeveni
ng.Itmi
ghtnotbeappr
opr
iat
etocall
themanatthatti
me.

Idecidetogothr
oughmycont r
act
.It
’spr et
tystrai
ghtfor
wardandnothi
ngcompl i
cat
edabouti
t.
Mostoft heit
emsMondehadgonet hrought hem wit
hme.Iini
ti
alandsignwhereIneedtoand
putitbackinmyhandbag.Igoontheinternettofi
ndreli
abl
eestat
eagents.Ineedtofi
nd
proper
tytorent
.I’
m notsurehowfart
helawyerwi
l
ltakemebutIdon’
twantt
obehomelessi
n
themeantime.Fort
unatel
ytheR50000theTOSgavehasbeensi
tti
nginmyaccountf
or
sit
uati
onsli
kethese.

Al
lthi
spl
anni
nggi
vesmeaheadache.I
t’
sof
fi
cial
Ihat
ebei
nganadul
t.Igof
orar
elaxi
ngbat
h.

Aftermybat hIdeci det ogosl eepsi ncet her eisnothingf ormet odo.Sl eepev adesme.Igo
throughmyFacebooknot hinginter
est i
ngt herebutpeopl echeckingi n.Whydopeopl echeck-i
n?
Aret her epeopl elooki ngandt ryi
ngt ofindy ourwher eabout s?Andt hent hepicsoffoodat
restaur ants!Ormay bet heyar eadver t
isingt hemeal s.I nstaiswor se.Al otoft hepeopleIgrew
upwi thorwentt oUni versitywithar estil
l singleandt ravelli
ngthewor ld.Thosewer esmar t
.
Mostmenar et radingkubusy .Everyonehasi mportantt hingstodo.Iwonderhowt heydoit.
Thei rli
v esseem soef fortl
ess.Igetbor edl ookingintot heirperfectlivesandgoonTwi t
ter
.
Not hingi strending.What sAppst atus.Not hingmuchi nteresti
ngt hereei t
her.What’sagirlt
odo
whenshecan' tsleep.Redt ube.Nowt hati sagi rl
’sbestf ri
end.Iatl easthav eenoughdat athis
ti
me.I ’
m notwor r
iedabouti tr
unningout, myi maginat i
onnev erf ai
leth.Ihav enewbatteri
esas
wel lsoI ’m sorted.Si nglelife.

JustasIpr epar
emy sel
ftobeinthemoodmymi nddri
ftstoSatur
dayandwhathappenedt
hat
ev
ening.Stupidmindisnotsel
ect
ive.I
tst
art
sr ememberingtheTOSmanhandli
ngme.Whata
moodkill
er.Iswit
chofmydat aandpackmyr abbit
.Iguessther
ewon'tbesel
flovetoni
ght
.

Howdi dInotknowt hatTsi etsiwasthiscr azythough?Arr

ogant?Yes.Selfabsorbed?Kakhulu.
Spoiltbrat,hell
yes.Def i
nitelyacheat er.Sowhydoesn’ thestaywit
hhi ssl
ayqueenandl eav
e
meal one?Howi sthi
sgoi ngt oaffecttheki ds?Tothem heisthei
rfather
.Nowt heymustbe
caughti nbetweenourf i
ght s.It
’snotright.Ihavenochoicethough.Ibeli
eveit
’sfortheir
prot
ect i
onaswel l.Whent heyar eoldert heycandecideforthemselveswhattheywant .Or
may bet hei
rf at
herwi l
lgrowapai randbecomet hefat
hertheyneedhimt obeunt i
lthenIhave
todowhat everisnecessar yt ogethimf arfrom me.

Myheadi
sspi
nni
ngf
rom al
ltheunanswer
edquest
ions.Ev
ent
ual
l
yIdr
if
tof
ftosl
eep.

Thefoll
owi
ngdayafterdroppi
ngtheki
dsoffI
’
m of
ftowor
kandI
'
m ear
ly.If
indMondeal
ready
atwork.Maybeshestayshere.Whoknows.

“
Goodmorni
ngMonde,”Igreetaf
terf
indi
ngherbur
iedbehi
ndherl
apt
op.Sheseemssur
pri
sed
t
oseeme.Iseem t
osurpr
iseheralot
.

“
Ili
ket
hesoundofmynamef
rom y
ou.
”Saywhatnow.Shei
sasshockedasIam t
hatcameout
ofhermout
h.“
Imeanmor
ning.
”Shegetbusywi
thpaper
sonhert
abl
e.

“
Woul
dyoul
i
kesomecof
fee?
”Iask.

“Yespl
ease.
”Itur
nasqui
ckl
yasIcanandtogomakeheracupasIwasshowny ester
day
.I
dumpthecoffeei
nthesi
nkatl
eastt
hreet
imesbef
oreI
’
m sat
isf
ied.Ibr
ingi
ttoher
.

“
Thanky
ou.”Shet
akesasipandsav
ouri
twi
thherey
escl
osed.Shei
sacof
feej
unki
ejustl
i
ke
me.“
Thi
sisgood.
”Sigh.

“
Any
thi
ngel
sey
ouneed?
”

“
I’
m goodf
ornow.
”Shei
sst
il
lav
oidi
ngey
econt
act
.

“Imetwit
hthedetecti
vey est
erday.
”Thatgetsheratt
ent
ion.Iupdateheronwhathappened.I
'
m
notsur
ewhy .Maybebecausesher ecommendedt hesepeople.Sheisi
nter
est
edthough.Sheis
seat
ingbackinherchairandli
steni
ngattent
ivel
y.

“
Don'
tsecondguessy
our
sel
f.Themomenty
ouf
eel
unsaf
eandt
hreat
enedar
oundsomeone.
I
t’
sti
metoact.
”

“I
t’
sli
keyoureadmymind.I
’
m wor r
iedaboutt
hekidsandhowthi
swil
laff
ectthem.Iknowfor
suret
houghIhavet
okeepmy sel
fsafeandthem aswell
.
”Aft
erafewminutesofourchatI
l
eavehertoherwor
k.

Assoonasthecl
ockhi
ts8am Ical
lthelawyer.Hesetsupanappoi
ntmentf
orduri
ngmylunch
hour
.Thedaygoesbyver
yfastandbeforeIknowit’
slunchti
me.Mondeisoutoft
heof
fi
ce
whenIl
eavebutshei
sawarethatI
'l
lbemeet ingwit
ht hel
awyer
.

It
’st
wohourslat
eraftermeetingwit
hGregandImustsaywehadafr
uit
ful
meet i
ng.Hepl
ans
toappl
yforacourti
nter
dictf
ortheauct
ionoft
hehouse.I
t’
sunl
awf
ulwhatTsi
etsidi
d.He
shoul
d’v
eletmesellt
hehousei nt
ime.
Appar ent
lyonceGregi
sdonewithhim.Hewi ll
havepai
dforthehouseandsi gni
tovertome.
WhichIwi ll
sell
andbuyasmall
erandmor emanageablepropert
y.Healsoplansontaki
nghim
tocourtfornotpay
ingmaint
enance,manhandli
ngandstal
king.Heplanstogetarest
rai
ning
orderagainsthi
m.Theki
dscanhav esuper
visedvi
sit
swheni t
ssuit
ablewithme.

I’
mimpressedwitht
hepl anofactionandIgivehi
mt hegoahead.WhenI ’
m donewi t
hhimi t
’s
almostt
imetoknockof fbutIgopasst heoffi
cej
usttochecki
fI’
m stil
lnotneeded.Bytheti
me
Igettot
heoffi
cebuil
dingev er
yoneel sei
sgoneexceptformybossofcourse.HerAMGGLE63
SSUV issti
ll
inthebasementpar king.Peopl
ewhohav emadeiti
nli
fe.Iparkfarf
rom hercar.

Iknockonheroff
iceandt
her
eisnoresponsesoIopent
hedoor.Sheisnotatherdesk.Just
asI’
m aboutt
otur
nbackIseeheronthecouchly
ingonherback.Iwal
ktowardsher.

“Hey
.I’
m back.Justchecki
ngifyouneedany
thi
ngbef
oreIl
eave.”Sheabruptlyget
sup.Crap.
Shewassleeping.Herhai
risl
ooseandcascadi
ngdownherback.It
’sgl
orious.Sheisbeaut
if
ul.
I
’mreal
lycuri
ousaboutherherit
age.

“
I’
m sor
ry.Idi
dn’
tmeant
odi
stur
byou.
”

“Ij
ustcl
osedmyey
esforasecondtothi
nk.Thenextt
hingI
’
m sl
eepi
ng.
”Sheput
shershoes
backonandwal
kstowar
dsherdesk.

“
Any
way
.I’
m aboutt
oleav
e.”Isayf
oll
owi
ngher
.

“Howdiditgo?”Sheleansonherdeskwhi l
ewai
tingfort
heanswer.I
’
m standingtoocloseto
herandIsuddenlyf
eelselfconsci
ous.Ideci
det
ot akeaseat
.ThenIfeel
mor eint
imidatedby
her.Whati
sitaboutthiswomant hatunset
tl
esme?

WhenI’
m doneupdati
ngherIknowi
t’
stimetogohome.Ist
andupandt
hatbr
ingsmei
ncl
ose
pr
oxi
mitytohai
r.Sheshoul
dkeepherhai
rloose.

“
Thanky
ouf
ory
ourhel
pMonde,
“myv
oicei
sscr
atchyandIcl
earmyt
hroat
.
“
It
’sapl
easur
e,”shesay
sinal
mostawhi
sper
.Ibr
eaki
ntogoosebumps.I
t’
sti
met
oleav
e.

“
Seey
out
omor
rowt
hen.
”ShenodsandIt
urnandwal
kout
.

“Woul
dy oul
iket
ojoi
nmefordinner
?”sheasksj
ustasI
'
m aboutt
oreacht
hedoor
.It
urnt
olook
ather
.“Ij
usthat
eeat
ingal
one.
”Shequickl
yadds.

“
Erm.Thekids.Idon’
thaveananny
.Theycompl
ainwhenIf
etcht
hem l
ate.
”Justt
hinki
ngof
Nthant
isi
’
ssidelooknj
eisenought
okeepmeincheck.

“
OhI
’
m sor
ry.If
orgot
.Anot
hert
imemay
be.
”Ahhpoorl
adymay
beshedoesn’
tev
enf
ri
ends.

“
Unl
essy
oudon’tmindt
hem j
oini
ngus.
”Shebr
eaksi
ntot
heemostst
unni
ngsmi
l
eev
erseen.
I
’
m moment
ari
lybli
ndedbyi
t.

“
NoIdon’
t.Youcanl
eav
eyourcarher
eanddr
ivet
oget
her
.Wewi
l
lfet
chi
taf
ter
.”

“
Okay
.”If
eel
abubbl
eofexci
tement
.

“
Okay
.Let
’sgot
hen,
”shesay
s.

Chapt
er7

“
Ami
l
li
onshar
dsofgl
ass

Thathauntmef
rom mypast

Ast
hest
arsbegi
ntogat
her

Andt
hel
i
ghtbegi
nst
ofade

Whenal
lhopebegi
nst
oshat
ter

Knowt
hatIwon'
tbeaf
rai
d
I
fIr
iski
tal
l

Coul
dyoubr
eakmyf
all
?”-Sam Smi
th

I
fyout hi
nkheroff
icei
simmaculat
ethenyouhaven’
tseenhercar
.Ihesi
tat
eabi
ttogoi
n.She
not
ices.Ofcour
seshedoes.Idon’
tthi
nkanyt
hingget
spassthisl
ady.

“
What
’swr
ong?
”sheasks.

“
Shoul
dIt
akemyshoesof
f?”

“
Don’
tbesi
l
lygeti
n.”

Igeti
nasshedoest
henst
art
sthecar
.Sheconnect
sherphonet
opl
aymusi
cwhi
l
etur
ningt
he
vol
umedown.

“
Wher
eto?
”sheasks

“
Bedf
ordVi
ew.
”

“
Howdoy
oucopewi
tht
het
raf
fi
c?”Sheasksasshenav
igat
esi
ntot
hemai
nroad.

“
Ihav
enochoi
cebossl
ady
.”Shesmi
l
es.Shegl
owswhenshesmi
l
es.

“
Don’
tyougethomel
atef
ort
heki
ds?
”

“I
’
m sti
ll
adj
ustingtomytime.I
t’
sonlymyseconddaybutalreadyI’
vebeenlatef
etchi
ngthem.
Asmuchast heyhaveaft
ercar
e,Ir
athernothav
ethem atday-car
eforsuchlonghour
s.Hence
I
’mlooki
ngforananny.”

“
Ican’
thel
pyout
her
e.Nev
erhadoneandnev
erneededone.
”
“Youdon’
twantki
ds?”Icoul
dkickmy sel
fri
ghtnow.I
’
vel
ear
nednott
oaskpeopl
eabouthav
ing
kidsasi
tmightbeasoresubj
ectforsome.

“Theyarenotont hecar
dsyet
.”Wedr i
vewhil
echatt
ingaboutthekids.Forsomeonewho
doesn’twantkidssheseemsveryint
erest
edi
nmine.Iwaxl yr
ical
aboutt hem l
i
keanymother
would.Wewai tformomentsl
iketheseasmother
s.

Wegettotheday-car
ecentr
ejustaf
ter6pm.Shewaitsbythepar
kingl
otwhi
leIgoinsi
det o
fet
chtheki
ds.If
indthem wi
thafewot herki
dsint
hewaiti
ngroom wat
chi
nganani matedmovi
e.
Themomenttheyseemet heybothcomer unni
ngtogiv
emeahug.Thenaf t
ertheygetthei
r
backsandwego.

“
I’
m sor
ryguy
sthatI
’
mlat
e.IseeJonat
hani
sgoneal
ready
.”

“
Idon’
tcar
eabouthi
m any
mor
e.”Khot
hat
sosul
ks.

“
Why
?”It
houghthewast
hemostr
eli
abl
ecl
ock.

“
Hei
sannoy
ing.
”Shesay
s.

“Hehasanewgi
rl
fr
iend.
”Nt
hat
isi
get
stot
her
ootoft
hepr
obl
em.Iwal
kthem t
owar
dsMonde’
s
car
.

“
Mommy
!Di
ddaddybuty
ouanewcar
?”Khot
hat
soexcl
aimswi
thexci
tement
.

“I
t’
snotminebaby.I
tismyboss’
car
.”Iopent
hedoorforthem att
heback.Onl
ynow Ir
eal
i
se
howdustytheyar
e.Theyhav
esandevery
where.I
t’
sli
ketheywentswi
mmi ngi
nit
.

“
Lookatyoutwo.Somuchsand.Mondedoy ouhaveablankett
heycansi
ton?
”I’
m mor
ti
fi
ed
r
ightnow.Okay
.Theyal
wayscomebacklooki
ngli
kethat
.It’
smyTazz.Noonecar
es.Weare
t
alki
ngaboutoff
-whi
tel
eat
herseat
shere.
“Lonaletthekidsbe.Geti
nki
ds.
”Idon’
trecogni
set hewomanspeakingri
ghtnow.Thet
wo
j
umpi nexcitedly
.Itr
yandhel
pNthat
isi
tobuckleup.Shei shavi
ngnoneofit
.Shecandoit
hersel
f.Ihavetowaitandmakesur
ethatshestrappedin.OnceI’
m backi
nmyseatIdothe
i
ntroducti
ons.

“
Guy
sthi
sismybossAunt
yMonde.Mondemeetmyki
dsKhot
hat
soandNt
hat
isi
.
”

“
Nicet
omeety
ouki
ds.
”

“
Thanky
ou.
”Theybot
hsay
.

“
I’
mtaki
ngy
ouguy
soutf
ordi
nner
.Wher
ewoul
dyoul
i
ket
ogo?
”

“
Any
wher
e?”Khot
hat
soconf
ir
ms.

“Yesdarli
ng.Youcanchoseanyplace,
”Mondesay
s.It
urnt
owat
cht
hem t
hinkaboutt
hei
r
choice.Nthat
isi
rel
i
esonKhothatso’
swisdom.

“
Spur
.”Khot
hat
sosay
s.

“
Andy
ouNt
hat
isi
?Ar
eyouokaywi
thSpur
?”

“
YesAunt
yMonde.
”Outofal
lther
est
aur
ant
stheyhav
etochoseSpur
.Myki
dst
hough.

“
Spuri
tis.Wher
eist
henear
estonemommy
?”Mondeasks.Idi
recthert
owar
dsEast
gat
emal
l
.

Aswewalkthrought
hefoodcour
t,Il
ookatall
therestaur
ant
swecouldhav
echosenbutke
foodi
sfood.Thetwoar
ewalki
ngjustaheadofus.Theyarenotev
enbot
heredt
hatt
heytooka
bathi
nsand.
“
Youdon'
tseem i
mpr
essedwi
tht
heki
dschoi
ce.
”Mondest
ates.

“
No,
real
l
yIdon’
tmi
ndi
t.
”

“
Youar
esuchabadl
i
ar.
”

Wegett
oSpurandwear
eseat
ednex
ttot
hepl
ayar
ea.

“
Mommycanwegopl
ay?
”

“Orderfir
stt
henyoucango.
”Theyar
enotreall
yimpressedwithmebutwedon’
thav
ethewhol
e
night.Thewait
erbr
ingst
hemenuandtheyorderwhattheyneedthenr
ushof
f.

“
Wat
chy
oursi
sterKhot
hat
so,
”Ical
laf
tert
hem.

“
Yourki
dsar
elov
ely
,”Mondesay
s.

“
Mor
eli
keahandf
ul,
”Ir
espond.

“
Whatar
eyouhav
ing?
”Ri
bs,
wingsev
ery
thi
ngt
hathasmeat
.I’
m api
g.

“I
’l
lhavetheChickenSchnitzelwi
thbakedpotato.
”Thatshoul
dfil
lmeup.Sheor der
swingsas
start
ersandthenagr i
ll
edchickensal
adforhermai n.Nowondershelooksgood.Shedoesn’
t
eat.Weorderourdrinks.Non-al
cohol
icofcourse.Iwoul
dloveaglassofwinebutIsti
l
lhaveto
goandf et
chmycar .

“Ihav
en’
tbeenher
esinceIwasinuni
versi
tyIt
hink.
”Shesaysl
ooki
ngaround.Themov
ement
makesmeawareofourclosepr
oxi
mity
.Isli
ghtl
yshif
tbuti
tdoesn’
thel
p.

“Thi
sismystapl
efoodsi
nceIbecameaparent
.Youtryandt
aketheki
dsanywher
efancy
.They
complai
nthatt
herewasnopl
ayarea.Tot
hem i
tsnotaboutt
hefood.
”
“
Icani
magi
ne.Youseem t
ohav
eitt
oget
hert
hough.
”

“
Thanky
ou.
”AsIbl
ush.Ourdr
inkscome.

“I
t’
smypl easure.
”Shesaysthatwit
hhereyeslockedinmine.Igetafri
ssonofawarenessup
myspine.Iquickl
ylookawaylestmyeyesbetraymyinter
est.I
t’swei
rd.I’
venev
erfeltsuch
awarenessaboutanotherwomanbef or
e.Ever
.ButI’
m notaversetoi
t.

“
Whatdoy
oudof
orf
unt
henLonabesi
depl
ayi
ngwi
tht
heki
ds?
”

“
Mylif
eiskindofbori
ng.Iusedtodothingswi
thmyhusband.Coupl esout
ings,hol
i
daysandal
l
t
hat
.NowI ’
mt r
yingt
ogetmysoci all
if
ebackontrack.Theonlyfr
iendIhaveismarri
ed.I
tsabi
t
wei
rdtogetbackoutther
e.”Sheisl
ookingatmei
nt ent
ly.Li
keI’
mt heonl
ypersonintheroom.

“
Sowhenyouwer
esti
ll
marr
iedyoudi
dev
ery
thi
ngwi
thy
ourhusband?
”Sheseemsshockedand
t
ryi
ngv
eryhar
dnott
oshowit.

“
Yes.Di
dn’
thel
pthatIhadsmal
lbabi
es.
”

“Ohwow.Oneshoul
dneverlosetheiri
ndiv
idual
i
tyoncemar
ri
ed.Youknow.If
eel
aper
sonmust
cont
inuet
odothethi
ngsthattheylove.
”

“Iguesswegetsuckedi
nthatbubbl
eandf
orgetev
ery
thi
ngel
se.Sot
ell
meabouty
our
sel
f.How
oldareyou?
”

“
Wow.NowIf
eel
li
keI
’
m bei
ngi
nter
viewed.
”Shet
akesasi
pofherdr
ink.

“Nowthatyou’
vement
ionedi
tcanwegobacktothati
nter
viewquest
ion.
”Ipushabi
t.She
seemsrel
axedsomaybeIcangetawaywi
thsuch.

“
Whi
chone?
”Shef
eignsi
gnor
ance.
“
Don’
tpr
etendl
i
key
oudon’
tknow.The‘
tel
lmeabouty
our
sel
f’quest
ion.Notev
enaquest
ion.
”

Shecov ersherfacewithherhands.Ijoki
ngl
ypul
lthem awayfr
om herf
ace.Thelaughterdies
andwear eleftstar
ingateachother.Myli
pssuddenl
yfeeldr
ysoIli
ckmyt hem.Hereyesdr op
tomylips.Ifeelwarmthspreadsfrom myhandsshooti
nguparm anddownmyspi ne.Iquickl
y
rel
easeherhandsandcl earmyt hr
oat.Thecont
actisbr
oken.

“Iwasfl
ust
eredbyyourpr
esencejustl
i
keIam r
ightnow.
”Whoa.Myey
esgobackt
oher
s.Li
ke
didshej
ustlayi
toutt
herel
ikethat
.

“
Whatdoyoumean? ”Sher
unsherhandsthr
oughherhai
r.I
t’
sherr
eal
hai
ral
ri
ght
.Whi
chmakes
mewonderaboutheret
hni
cit
y.I
sshecolour
ed?

“Lona.I’
m att
ract
edtoyou.Ihav
ebeenf r
om themomentIl
aidmyey esonyou.Ihaddecided
nottohireyoubasedonthatbutIcoul
dn’tgety
ououtofmyheadsincethen.Ihadtoseeyou
again.AndnoIdon’tmakeahabitofmakingmov esonmysubor
dinates.
”Icantel
lthi
stooka
l
otf r
om hertolayher
sel
fbareli
kethat
.

“
Idon’
tknowwhatt
osay
.”Iam t
rul
yspeechl
ess.

“
Youdon’
thav
etosayany
thi
ng.
”

“
I’
veneverbeenwi
thawomanbef or
e.”NotI’
m noti
nterest
edortrynextdoor
.HayiHahanotme.
I
’
m basical
l
ysayi
ngokaybutIdon’
thavetheexperi
ence.ImustadmitthoughI’
m cur
ious.She
i
ntr
iguesme.

“LonaIknowyouprobabl
ydon’
tfeelt
hesame.Youar
edef
ini
tel
ynotobl
i
gat
edt
ofeel
thewayI
do.Ishoul
dn’
thav
esai dany
thi
ng.”

“
Okay
.”I
’
m sav
edbyt
hewai
terbr
ingi
ngourmeal
.Iaskshi
mtogetmyki
dsandhedoes.

“
I'
m 28byt
heway
,”shesay
s.Ihadf
orgot
tent
hequest
ion.She’
sissoy
oungt
obei
nthatseni
or
posi
ti
on.Peopl
ehav
ecl
ear
lyl
i
vedwhi
l
eIsl
eptundert
hebl
anketcal
l
edmar
ri
age.Theki
dscome
backtothet
abl
e.

“
Doy
ouwantsomewi
ngs.
”Mondeof
fer
s.Shest
il
lshar
esherl
i
ttl
efood?

“Yesplease.”Thetwohador deredt
heki ddi
espizza.Theyareveryhappyt ohav eherwi ngs.I’
m
soembar r
assedrightnow.Whathappenedt otheirmanners?Demonst r
atingTOSt endencies.
Mondei sagr eatsportthoughsheput sthedishinthecentreandweal lshare.Shequest ions
them abouttheirage,school andfr
iends.Theyengageheri nananimatedconv ersati
on.She
doesn’tknowshame, myki dscantalk.Theyaskquest i
onsabouthercar ,herteet
h, t
hecol our
ofherey es.Theyevengoasf arasaskingift
heycouldt ouchherhai
r.LikeWTF.

Ofcoursesheobligesandgr antsever
ywi sh.Theyev enhaveadatetogotothemov i
es.
Subj
ecttomommyagr eeing.Whatkindofamot herwouldIbeifIref
used.Theyasktogoplay
onelastt
ime.Iletthem be.IcanseeNt hatisif
ighti
nghersleep.WhenIchecktheti
mei t
’s
al
most9pm.Waypasst heirbedti
me.Ourwai tercomesbackandMondeset t
lest
hebil
l.Of
cour
seIputupaf i
ghtandaskt ospli
tthebill
.Sher ef
uses.Sheist
heonewhoaskedmeout .I
l
etherbe.I’
mt oobr oketoar gueanyfurt
her.

“
Ihadagr
eatt
imewi
thy
ourf
ami
l
y.”Shesay
s

“
Met
oo.Youar
eact
ual
l
yfunt
obear
ound.
”

“
What
?Yout
houghtIwast
hisupt
ight
,st
uckupbi
tch.
”Shei
snotmal
i
ciousabouti
t.

“
Iact
ual
lyt
houghtofyouasadominat
ri
x.
”WhywouldIsayt
hat
?Someoneshootme.Shei
s
l
ooki
ngatmenowwi t
hanintensel
ookonherf
ace.

“
Thatcoul
dbear
ranged.
”Herv
oicei
ssof
terbutf
ir
m.Myt
ummycl
enches.

“
Arey
oui
ntot
hat
?”shesmi
l
es.

“
Idon’
treal
l
ypr
act
icebutIl
oveabi
tofcont
rol
her
eandt
her
e.Orbei
ngcont
rol
l
ed.I
tdepends
ont
hemood.
”

“
Okay
.”Justt
henmyki
dscome.Wear
ereadyt
ogo.

“Ki
ds.SaythankyoutoAunt
yMondefordi
nner.
”Theybot
hchor
us.Thenwear
eout
.Wenot
evenfaroutthemall
andtheki
dsar
efastasl
eep.

“
Okay
.Ithi
nki
t’
slat
efory
out
ofet
cht
hecar
.HowaboutIdr
opy
ouof
fathomet
hencomepi
ck
y
ouupinthemorni
ng?
”

“
Woul
dn’
tthatbeani
nconv
eni
ence?
”

“
Iwoul
dn’
tbeaski
ngi
fitwas.
”

“
Okay
.Thanky
ouMonde.
”

“
Whatt
imedoy
oudr
opof
ftheki
ds?
”

“
By6h30.
”

“
I’
ll
beaty
ourhouseby6t
hen.
”

Wear ri
veatthehouseandshepar ksinsidethey
ardandhelpmecar r
ythesl
eepi
ngbeauties
i
nsidethehouse.I’
m notevenbat hingthem.Thatwouldbetort
uretowakethem up.Wewalk
str
aightupst
air
stotheirbedroom.Shehel psmetoremovethei
rclot
hesandleavethem i
n
vestsandpanti
es.Luckil
ytheydidn’thaveanycooldri
nksfordi
nner.

Wewalkbackdownst
airs.Onl
ynowIreal
i
seshei
swal
ki
ngbar
efoot
.Thatbr
ingshert
omy
hei
ghtwi
thmyheelson.Sheistal
l
ert
hanme.

Wearecur
rent
lyst
andi
nginthemi
ddl
eofmyempt
yli
vi
ngr
oom.I
t’
sli
keahal
lwayi
nher
e.
Empt
yspacesever
ywhere.
“
Thi
sisabi
ghousef
orj
ustt
het
hreeofy
ou.I
sitnot
?”

“I
’v
ebeenwant i
ngtosell
itf
oralongti
measy ouknowmyexhasbeenput t
ingablocki
nthat
.
ButI’
mlookingforapl
acetost
ay .
”Shenodsherhead.“Woul
dyouli
kesometeaorcoff
ee?”I
’
m
confi
denti
nwhatIhaveinmykitchencupboar
dIdidgrocer
yshoppi
ngonSunday
.

“
Thanky
oubutIhav
etogo.I
t'
sget
ti
ngl
ate.
”Shesay
sregr
etf
ull
y.

“
It
’scool
nextt
imethen.
”DidIj
ustext
endacoff
eei
nvi
tat
ion.Hoel
i
fe.Iwalkhert
othecarand
wai
tassheopensherdoor
.“Dr
ivesaf
e.Sendmeat
extandletmeknowy ougothome.
”

“I
’l
ldo.Goodni ghtLona.
”I’
m suddenlyengul
fedinawarm hug.Shesmell
sheavenly.The
embr aceissoftyetf
eelssafe.Shepull
sbackandwel etgoofeachother
.Ihugmy self.I
neededmor eofthat
.Justl
ikethatsheisgone.Igobacktothehouseandlockup.Ican’thel
p
butreplaythedayinmyhead.Igosoaki nt
hebathwithapermanentsmil
eonmyf ace.Ifeel
gi
ddyandexci tedaboutthepossibi
li
ti
es.

Aftermybat
hIgocheckontheki
dsandfi
ndthem sti
ll
inLal
aland.Backinmyroom Il
ayin
bedandcheckmye-mailf
ormynannyandrent
alplacehuntr
esponses.Not
hingyet
.Justt
henI
receiv
eansms.

-Thanky
ouonceagai
nforal
ovel
yev
eni
ng.I
’
m homesaf
e. -

Ir
espondwi t
hakissi
ngemoj
iaswel
l
.JustasI
’
m aboutt
ocat
chmysl
eep.Myphoner
ings.I
t’
s
anunregi
ster
ednumber.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“
Hi.
”Myhear
tst
opsf
orasecond.Mywor
d,mywhol
ebodygoesi
ntoaf
renzyofemot
ions.

“
HiSazi
.”I
tcomesoutl
i
kebr
eat
hywhi
sper
.
“Ar
eyougood?
”Icanf
eel
myhear
tbeatt
huddi
ngagai
nstmychest
.Am Igood?No.I
’
m not
good.

“
YesIam.AndYou?
”Idon’
trecogni
set
hissmal
lvoi
cer
ightnow.Umnt
uuy
amut
hsa.

“
I’
m good.
”Si
l
ence.Yep.I
’
vemi
ssedev
ent
heawkwar
dmoment
s.I
’
m doomed.

“
Howwasy
ourf
ir
stdayatwor
k?”hecont
inues.

“
Itwasgood.
”Mor
esi
l
ence.

“
Ngi
l
aer
oundi
nikuwe.
”Isi
tupandf
ixmynonexi
stenthai
r.

“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”I’
m notsur
ewhymybr
eat
hisescal
ati
ng.

“
Asi
nout
sidey
ourhouse.
”

“
Oh.
”I’
m soexci
tedr
ightnow.

“
Doy
ouwantt
ocomeout
?”It
hinkabouti
tforaspl
i
tsecond.

“
Okay
.Gi
vemet
womi
nut
es.
”

“Sure.
”Hehangsup.Youshouldseemespri
ntoutofmyblankets.Runningtomywar drobe
nakedlookingf
ormymor ni
nggown.Shoul
dIwearleggi
ngsandanov er
sizet-shi
rt
?Naht hat’
sa
l
otofwor k.Morni
nggownwilldo.Sl
i
demysleeper
sinandrushoutside.Hiscarisparkedright
atthegate.Hegetsoutwhenheseesmeapproach.Hei
swear i
ngsweat pants,hoodi
eand
sneakers.
“
Hey
.”Hegr
eet
sonceher
eachesme.

“
Hi.
”Ihav
etol
ookupwi
thoutmyheel
s.

“Come,geti
n.”Hedoesn'
twaitformyresponse.Hegoesandopenst hepassengerdoorf
orme.
Theregoesmymor ni
nggownr eveal
i
ngmywhol ethi
ghasIsi
t.HeclosesthedoorandIwatch
him wal
karoundtohi
sside.Onceheisinherelaxesbacki
nhisseatandlooksatme.

“
Howar
etheki
ds?
”

“
Theyar
egood,
fastasl
eep.
”

“
Tel
lmeabouty
ourf
ir
stdayatwor
kthen.
”

“
Fir
stt
woday
syoumean.
”

“
Iwant
edt
ocheckony
ouy
est
erdaybutIwasawayonbusi
ness.Ij
ustar
ri
vednow.
”

“
Itwasn'
tamustf
ory
out
o.”

“Iwantedt
o.Nowt ellme.”Well
witht
hatcommandi ngvoi
cehowcanInot .Istar
tfr
om
yest
erday’
sevents.Aboutmyboss.Howhelpfulshehasbeen.Itel
lhim everyt
hingthatwent
downexceptthebutterf
li
esIgetinmystomachwhenI ’
m aroundher.Orthefactthatshe
admitt
edtohavingfeeli
ngsforme.No.I
’m ahoenotstupi
d.

“
Yourbossi
sver
yat
tent
ivet
oyourneeds.
”I’
m notsur
eofhi
stone.

“
Shei
sjustbei
nghel
pful
.
”

“
Sogoodofher.Justtocaut
iony
out
hough.Oncey
ourexfeelst
hescr
ewst
ight
en,
hewi
l
l
r
etal
i
ate.Heseemsliket
hetypet
oat
tackwhenheiscor
nered.
”
“
That
’swhyI
’
m al
soget
ti
ngar
est
rai
ningor
deragai
nsthi
m.”

“
Thatmot
herf
uckerwon'
tbest
oppedbyar
est
rai
ningor
derLona.Youneedt
obev
erycar
eful
.”

“
Youar
escar
ingmeSazi
.”

“Heyhey,
”hesay sgentl
ywhil
etaki
ngmyhandsinhis.Itwasmeanttobereassur
ingbuti
thas
j
ustsentthesignalel
sewhere.“
It
’snotmeantt
oscarey ou.Ij
ustwanty
outoknowwhaty ou
areupagainst
.Hewon’ tpl
aybytherul
es.
”Iwasconfl
icted.

“
Shoul
dIcancel
thel
awsui
tandt
hechar
ges?
”

“NotwhatI’
m say
ing.Youneedprot
ect
ion.Icangety
ouasecur
it
ydet
ail
tobewi
thy
ouandt
he
kids.
”Real
l
ynow.Ingathiuy
ayi
baxangokuuSazi.

“
Isn’
tthatabi
text
reme?
”

“
Wearebei
ngsaf
eandast
epaheadofhi
m.It
hinkwhi
l
ethecasei
sst
il
lpendi
ngy
ouneedt
o
mov
eout.
”Myheadi
sspi
nni
ng.

“
I’
m cur
rent
lyl
ooki
ngf
orapl
acet
orent
.”Thef
eel
ofhi
shandsonmi
nei
snothel
pingei
ther
.

“Iwantedtodot hi
sfory
oubutIdi
dn’
twantt
ocomeoffasover
beari
ng.Ihav
eanempt y
penthousethatyoucanuse.
”Wit
hSaziy
oucanact
ual
l
yf or
gett
hatheismarri
ed.Thati
sone
thi
ngIshouldn’t
.

“
SaziIcan’
tacceptthatf
rom y
ou.
”Hebl
owsahugebr
eat
handcl
oseshi
sey
esf
orasecond.I
misshi
shandsalready.

“
Weal
lneedt
oaccepthel
pfr
om peopl
eatsomepoi
nti
nourl
i
ves.Don’
tbest
ubbor
naboutt
his.
”
“CanIatleastt
hinkabouti
t.
”I’
m notsur
ewhattheuni
verseistr
yingtoteachmebutI’
m
overwhel
medbyal lthi
sgener
osit
yaroundme.Thesepeopledon’
tknowmeandy ett
heyare
off
eringall
ofthi
s.Imaynotknowmuchbutbot hMondeandSazi ar
ereall
ygenui
neabout
helpi
ngme.

“
Okay
.Don’
ttaket
ool
ongt
odeci
de.
”

“
Iwon'
t.
”Hesi
tsbackagai
nwi
thhi
sey
escl
osedandar
msf
oldedov
erhi
schest
.

“
Ihav
etogo.
”Her
emai
nswi
thhi
sey
escl
osed.

“
Pleasest
ayf
orabi
t,
”hesay
s.

“
Buty
ouseem t
ir
ed.
”

“
Iam butI
’
m enj
oyi
ngy
ourcompany
.”

Wesi
tinsi
l
encef
orawhi
l
eunt
ilmyey
esar
etooheav
ytokeepopen.

“Lona.
”Iopenmyeyest
ofindSazi
’
sfacecl
oset
omi
ne.Isowantt
oki
sshi
mri
ghtnow.Isi
t
backtokeepabi
tofadist
ance.

“
DidIf
all
asl
eep?
”hei
sst
il
ll
ooki
ngatme.

“
Yepf
oraboutt
wohour
s.”What
?

“
Whydi
dyoul
etmesl
eepsol
ong?
”whyIsl
epti
nthef
ir
stpl
acei
sbey
ondme.

“
YouseemedatpeaceandIwasenj
oyi
ngwat
chi
ngy
ousl
eep.
”
“
Youar
ewei
rd.Ihav
etogoi
n.”

“
Iknow.Letmewal
kyoui
n.It
’salmostmi
dni
ght
.”Hegoesout,
comestomysi
deandopensf
or
me.Hewalkswi
thmeunt
ilwereachmydoorst
ep.It
urnar
oundandf
acehi
m.

“GoodnightSazi
.”Hesnakeshishandaroundmyneckcuppingthebackofmyheadashepulls
mecloser.Il
oseallabi
l
itytobr
eathe.Hehasmanagedtobringourbodi
escl
oserandI
’m not
pret
est
ing.Event
uall
yIplacemyhandsonhi schestf
orbal
ance.If
eelweakatt
heknees.

“GoodnightLona.
”Hi smelodicdeepv oi
cesendsshiversdownmyspi ne.Mythr
oatfeel
s
patched.Thenheplantsasof tki
ssonmyf oreheadandl et
’sgo.Heputshi
shandsinhis
pockets,afami
li
arstance.Iturnaroundandopenmydoort henwaveathim.Hestepsbackand
thenheisgone.Iquickl
ylockupandgetagl assofwat erfrom t
heki
tchen.

Onmywayt omyroom Itakeapeakatt

hekidsandt heyaresti
l
lout.WhenIcheckmyphone
i
t’
saft
ermidni
ghtandIhaveanearl
ymorning.Isetanalarmfor5am thenfal
lintoanevent
ful
sl
eepthati
sri
ddenwit
himagesofSaziandMondeatv ari
ousoccasi
ons.Deli
ciousdreamsI
mustsay.

Whenmyalar
m goesoffIf
eell
iket
hrowingmyphoneagainstt
hewal
l
.Thet
houghtofMonde
get
ti
ngher
eandfindsusnotr
eadypropelsmet
ogetoffthebed.

Igotakeabathfirstt
henwakethekidsup.Iputthem i
nthebathandgopreparet
heircl
othes.I
takeext
racareinchoosi
nganoutfi
ttoday.Ihavealadytoi
mpress.Aft
ergetti
ngreadywego
downstai
rsforbreakf
ast
.Justaswef i
nisheati
ngmyphoner i
ngsandit
’sMonde.Verypunctual
Imustsay.Wegetourbagsandr ushtohercar.

“
Mor
ningAunt
yMonde.
”Thet
wobur
stoutassoonasIopent
hedoorf
ort
hem.

“Mor
ningyout
wo.”Thentheconv
ersat
ionst
art
s.Theydon’
tkeepqui
etunt
ilwedr
opt
hem of
f.
Ohandtheymakeapointtor
emindheraboutt
hemov i
es.

Wegett
owor
kandar
etheonl
ypeopl
etoar
ri
vey
eti
nourf
loor
.Onceweset
tl
einwegomake
cof
feet
oget
her.I
’
m notsur
ehowtobearoundheratworkt
hough.Thedy
nami
cshav
eshi
ft
ed.
Oncewehaveourcupsr
eadyshel
eadsmetoheroff
ice.

“
Howwasy
ourev
eni
ng?
”sheasks.Shei
ssi
tt
ingopposi
temeont
heset
tee.

“
Itwasgood.
”Shedoesn’
thav
etoknowwhatmadei
tgood.“
Your
s?”

“
Itwasgood.Ihopeyounotuncomfort
ablewithmyrevel
ati
onsfr
om t
hepr
evi
ousni
ght
.Imust
warnyout
houghhereatwork,I
’m st
il
ltheupt
ightsl
avedri
ver.
”

“
Iwoul
dn’
texpectany
thi
ngl
ess.AndnoI
’
m notuncomf
ort
abl
e.”

“
Good.Howi
smyday
?”j
ustl
i
ket
hatshei
sint
obossmode.

“Letmegetmypl anner.
”Iwalkoutandgr abplannerandret
urnt
of i
ndheronhercellphone.
Sheist
r y
ingtogetawor dinbutthepersonont heothersi
dewon'tgi
veherachance.Eventuall
y
sheagreestowhatev ert
hepersonsaysunt i
lshehangsup.Whoev erwasont hatcal
lhasjust
rui
nedhermood.Icanseet heshifti
nherey es.Oncewedonegoingov erherdi
aryIgobackt o
myworkst at
ionandfindalmostevery
onei n.

“Gi
rl
.Youarej
ustl
i
key
ourbossIsee,
anearl
yri
ser.”Fi
siwer
emar
kst
hemomentsheseesme.
Thensher
egal
esmewit
htal
esofhernewboyfr
iend.

Ir
eceiv
eacallf
rom Gregduri
ngthedaylett
ingmeknowt hatt
herestr
aini
ngorderhasbeen
gr
antedandawarrantofhi
sarresthasbeenissuedf
orassaul
t.Basi
call
ymyintent
ionsare
cl
ear
lystat
ed.Weareatwar.

I
tsnotl
ongaf
terspeaki
ngt
omyl
awy
erwhenIr
ecei
veacal
lfr
om anunr
egi
ster
ednumber
.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“
Youst
upi
dbi
tch.Whatar
eyout
ryi
ngt
opr
ove?Doy
ouhav
eanyi
deaofwhatIcandot
oyou?
”
TheTOSdoesn’
tscar
eme.Uzondot
husangeny
okaef
il
eyoapha!Rha!

Chapt
er8

“
Tel
lmewhaty
ougon'
dot
ome

Conf
ront
ati
onai
n'
tnot
hin'
newt
ome

Youcanbr
ingabul
l
et,
bri
ngaswor
d

Br
ingamor
gue,
buty
oucan'
tbr
ingt
het
rut
htome

Fucky
ouandal
lyourexpect
ati
ons

Idon'
tev
enwanty
ourcongr
atul
ati
ons

Ir
ecogni
zey
ourf
alseconf
idenceandcal
cul
atedpr
omi
sesal
li
nyourconv
ersat
ion

Ihat
epeopl
ethatf
eel
ent
it
led

Lookatmecr
azy'
causeIai
n'
ti
nvi
tey
ou

Oh,
youi
mpor
tant
?

Yout
hemor
alt
othest
ory
,youendor
sing?

Mot
her
fucker
,Idon'
tev
enl
i
key
ou

Cor
ruptaman'
shear
twi
thagi
ft

That
'showy
ouf
indoutwhoy
oudeal
i
n'wi
th

Asmal
lper
cent
age,
whoI
'
m bui
l
dingwi
th

Iwantt
hecr
edi
tifI
'
mlosi
ngorI
'
m wi
nni
ng

Onmymommat
hat
'st
her
eal
estshi
t”
-Kendr
ickLamar

“
Gof
ucky
our
sel
fTsi
etsi
,
”Ir
espond.

“
Bit
chy
oudon'tknowme.Yout hi
nky
oucantakemykidsawayf
rom me?Youwantt
opoi
son
t
hei
rmindsagai
nstme.I
’
llki
l
lyoubef
oreIl
ett
hathappen!
”

“Youhaveal oosescr
ewt hatneedsabitofti
ghteni
ng.Gogethel
p.Justknowonet hi
ng.You
arenotgett
inganywherenearmeormyki ds!
”Ihangup.Isheevenal
lowedt ocont
actme?Sazi
mighthavebeenr i
ght.Theidiotwon’
tplaybythebook.Hesoundsunhingedtoo.
TodayMondehasameet ingoutofof
ficeandwon'tbecomi ngback.Itaketheoppor t
unityto
knockoffearly
.Igopasstheestat
eagentandtheystil
ldon’
thaveanav ai
l
ableplacetol eton
theareaIneed.Theypromisemeinthreeweekstime.I’
m sureIcanhangonunt ilthen.Igo
pickupmyki ds.Theycomplai
naboutbeingf
etchedearl
ybecauset heywerestil
lplaying.
Clear
lyIwil
lneverwin.

Aft
ersupperwhentheki
dsareasl
eepIchi
l
l i
nbedandr emembert
hatLal
ahadpr
omi
sedme
l
unch.Ihaven’
tspokent
oherinawhi
leanyway.Ideci
detocal
lher
.

“
Heybabe.
”Shei
sinabet
termoodt
hant
hel
astt
ime.

“
HiLal
a.Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m good.I
’
vebeenmeani
ngt
ocal
lyou.Howi
syournewj
ob?
”

“I
t’
sgreat
.Peopl
eIworkwithar
ekindsoj
aIthi
nkI'
m goingt
oli
keitt
her
e.”I
’
m nott
ell
i
ngher
aboutmyonesidedl
ovetr
iangl
e.I
’
m notr
eadyfort
hejudgement
.

“I
’m gl
ad.Youdeser
veabr
eakmyf
ri
end.
”Shesoundsdownagai
n.Somet
hingi
sof
fwi
thher
.I
canfeeli
t.

“
I’
mtaki
ngTsi
etsi
tocour
t.
”

“
Final
l
y.I
t’
saboutti
methati
diotgetswhat
’scoming.Whatconv
incedy
out
o?I
’
vebeent
ell
i
ng
y
ousinceheref
usedtosi
gnov ert
hehousetoyou.”

“
Ithi
nkt
heaccesst
olawy
ersmadei
teasyt
omov
efor
war
d.”

“I
’m gl
ad.Heneedst
opay
.Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
hisweekend?May
beIcant
akey
ououtt
o
cel
ebrate.
”

“
Ihav
epl
ansSat
urday
.May
beFr
idayni
ghti
fyournannywon'
tmi
ndt
heki
dsorSunday
.”
“
LetmecheckBr
ian’
sschedul
ethenI
’
llcomebackt
oyou.
”

“
Cool
.Letmeknowke.Goodni
ght
.”

Wor khasbeenhecti
c.Idi
dn’
tseemuchofMondeasshewenttoCapeTownforafewdays.I
t’
s
aFr i
dayandther
eisnothi
ngmuchtodowi t
houtmybossi
ntheof
fi
ce.Thr
oughoutt
heweek
I
’vebeenavoidi
ngcall
sfrom unr
egi
ster
ednumbers.Af
ewti
mesIhadanswer
edithadbeen
Tsietsi
spi
tt
ingvenom.

Lal
aandIaregoi
ngoutfordri
nks.Apparent
lyBr
iani
sworki
ngtheni
ghtshi
ftsoLal
acanal
so
gooutandpl
ay.Thenannyagreedtobabysi
tsowearegoodtogo.

Ideci
detodr i
vetheki
dst oherplaceandplanonfetchi
ngthem l
ateron.Iseri
ouslyneedmy
ownnanny .Notonl
yisitnotsafebutit’
saninconv
eniencetothekidst
odr agthem outoft
hei
r
comfortzone.Wedecidetogof ordinnerandmaybeagl assofwineortwoatPi att
o.Atl
east
wearenott oofarf
rom home.

Thepl aceisnotsobusy.Wecanr elaxandcatchup.Wewai tf

orourf oodov erabottleofwi ne.
Thev i
bei sni
ceandt heconv ersat
ionisfl
owing.OfcourseI’
m beingsel ect
iveaboutwhatt ot el
l
her.Idon’tmenti
onthebosswhodecl ar
edherintentandIobv i
ouslydon’tment ionthemi dnight
vi
sitsfrom amarri
edman.Ial sofeell
ikesheisholdingback.Thereissomet hingmi ssingfrom
Lala.Sheisnottheusual bubblefri
endIknow.Idecidet odosomepr obingabi t
.I’m notonet o
prythough.Ialwaysrespectwhenpeopl edon’twantt osharethei
rpersonal problemsand
al
way sallowthem toopenupont heirown.

“
Lal
aMyf
ri
endIknowy
ou.Youar
enoty
our
sel
flat
ely
.What
’sgoi
ngon?
”

Shetakesasipofherwi
neandseemst
obel
osti
nhert
hought
s.Ideci
det
oleti
tsl
i
debutt
hen
athoughtcr
ossesmymind.

“
Isi
tAt
hi?
”

“
What
?”Thatseemst
osnapheroutofherr
ever
ie.
“
Arey
ouf
all
i
ngf
orhi
m?”Shef
rowns.

“
NomanLona.At
hi wasjustaoneti
medistr
acti
onagoodoneImi ghtaddbuti
twasonceof
f.
”
Herf
acegl
owsasifrememberingt
hisonceoffevent
.I’
mtr
yingv
eryhardtobl
ockt
hememory.

“I
’m worr
iedphel
a.di
dyouknowt
hatAt
hii
sangaged.
”Ohshi
tshedi
dn'
t.Shenear
lychokeson
herdri
nk.

“
HeI
s?”Shecan'
thi
dehershock.

“Yes.Imethert
heot
herday.Idi
dn’tknowhowt
oactar
oundher
.If
eltgui
l
tyony
ourbehal
funt
il
sheshowedmehersnobbishtendencies.
”

“
Iyoh!Idi
dn’
tknow.Mar
aAt
hii
ssuchadi
ckt
hough.
”

“
I’
m gl
adi
twasaonceof
fthi
ngwi
thhi
m atl
easty
oudon’
tgetmi
xedupi
nthatsi
tuat
ion.
”

“
Ja.Youar
eri
ght
.”Notv
eryconv
inci
ng.

“
Wher
edi
dyoumeetAt
hi’
sfi
ancé?Ar
eyouhol
dingoutonme?
”

“
Noman.Hehost
edsomef
undr
aisi
ngt
hingandSazi
inv
itedme.
”

“
Sazi
,themar
ri
edf
ri
end?
”Ihearahi
ntofj
udgementi
nhert
one.

“
Ther
eisnot
hingisgoi
ngonbetweenus.Ithoughtt
herewasnoj
udgmenther
e.”YesI
’
m
j
udgi
ngmysel
f.Idon’
tneedanot
herl
ayerofguil
tadded.

“I’
m notj
udging.Ijustrememberhowy ouf el
twhenTsi etsicheatedonyou.Ididn’
tthi
nkyou’
d
wantsomeoneel sefeeli
ngt
hatway .
”Sheisr i
ght
.Iknowt his.Tr
yandtell
myi nnerhoethat
keepswhispering‘butwehaven’
tdoneany thi
ngwr ong’that'swhoIdon’tt
rust.Youknowwhen
theysaythemi ndisthedevi
l’
splayground.Yep.I
t’
st r
ue.
“
Iheary
ou.
”Myconsci
encel
aysi
tonmeev
eryt
ime.

Ourfoodarri
vesandweor deranotherbottl
eofwi netogowith.Nothi
nglikegoodf oodand
company.Ireal
isethatIhavemi ssedLala.Itfeel
sgoodtohangoutwi thher.IwishIcantel
lher
aboutmybuddi ngfeeli
ngsfortwodi ff
erenthotspecimen.I
’
mj ustafr
aidshe’l
ltalkmeoutofit
bybeingt
hev oiceofreason.Sher ecei
vesaf ewsms’ sasweeatandr espondst othem wi
tha
smil
eonherf ace.Iwonderwhomi ghtbemaki ngherbl
ushbutIdon’task.She’
lltel
lmeifshe
wantsmet oknow.I tcoul
dbeBr ianforallIknow.

Wear edoneeat
ingjustenj
oyi
ngourwineandcatchi
ngup.IlookuptoseeAt
hibyt
heent
rance
foll
owedinbySaziandsomeoneelse.Thesemenlookgood.Ilooknextt
omeandfi
nda
blushi
ngLal
awithagui l
tyl
ookonherface.

“
Lal
a.Di
dyoui
nvi
tet
hem?
”Myt
ummyi
sdoi
ngsomer
saul
tsatt
hesi
ghtofSazi
.Hel
ooks
y
ummy .

“HeaskedwhereIwas, Itol
dhi m.Idi
dn’tknowHewoul dcomeandIcer tai
nlydidn’tknowhe
wouldbri
ngcompany .RelaxChoma.Let ’
shav efun.”TheonlyfunIwanttohav eistojumpSazi
andhavemywi ckedwaywi thhim.Theyr eachourt abl
e.At
hiisallsmil
esandbubbl y,Sazihi
s
usualcl
osedoffsel
fandt henewguyi sneut r
al.Iguessheisassessingthesit
uation.Athigi
ves
ushugsashiswayofgr eeting.Sazij
ustdoesaqui cknodtowar dsLalaandcomesst rai
ghtt
o
me.Hedoest heunimaginable.Envel
opsmei nhi sarmsandhugsme.Ihav eami ni or
gasm
ri
ghtnow.Hedoesn’tletgoandIdon’ twanthimt o.

“
Hey
.”Hewhi
sper
sagai
nstmyear
.

“Hi.
”Iwhisperri
ghtback.Thenheletsgo.Leav
ingmef
eel
i
ngemptyandberef
t.Hethenpul
l
sa
chairnextt
ome.Al r
eadyev er
yoneissi
tti
ngdownandi
nconv
ersat
ionseemi
nglyobl
ivi
oust
o
thesexualtensi
onI’
mf eel
ing.

“
Lonameetourot
herf
ri
endAceshor
tforAndi
l
e.Acet
hisi
sLona.
”At
hii
ntr
oducesus.

“
Pleasedt
omeety
ouLona.I
sitshor
tforsomet
hing?
”
“Nicetomeetyout
ooAce.Ther
eisalongexpl
anati
ont
hatcomeswi
thmyname.
”Ev
ery
onei
s
i
nterest
ed.Ev
enLal
a.Weneverdi
scussedt
hatpart
.

“Appar
ent
lymymot herhadadi ff
icultbi
rt
hwher esheal
mostlostbot
hofourli
ves.Soeveryone
wasinconst
antprayer
.WhenIwasbor ntheyweresorel
iev
edthatmygrandmotherut
tered
‘
KodwaLonalinamamdlaigazilemv ana.(Ther
eispowerinthebl
oodofJesus.
)’SoIwas
namedLonaoutofthatsentence.”

“
Ohwow.Sopr
ofound.Inev
erknewt
hat
,”Lal
asay
s.

“
Youcoul
d’v
ebeenLi
namandl
aaswel
l
,”Sazi
obser
ves.

“
Mysecondname,
”Iconf
ir
m.

“
Ihopey
ounotNomagazi
aswel
l
.’At
hisay
scl
utchi
nghi
schest
.Hei
sani
diott
hough.

Thatst
artsofftheconversat
ion.WeteaseAceabouthi
snickname.Whatdoesi
thavetodo
wit
hAndile.LalaandIareonat hir
dbott
leofwineandIcanfeel
theef
fect
s.Imustcal
li
tan
ni
ghtotherwiseI’
m headi
ngst r
aightt
osloshedl
and.

“
Weneedt
ogo,
”Iwhi
spert
oLal
a.Shef
rowns.

“Nahfri
end.Theni
ghti
sst
il
lyoung,t
hekidsaref
inewi
thaunt
ywhatarey
ouinahur
ryf
or?
”I’
m
annoyedri
ghtnow.Wehadagreedondi
nner.NowsheseesAt
hiandshewant
sanal
lni
ght
er.I
tel
lherasmuch.

“
Wewer
eact
ual
l
yonourwayt
oahousepar
ty.Youguy
scanj
oinus,
”At
hii
nvi
tes.

“Wewouldloveto,”hereagerresponsegratesmyti
tsbutIkeepsi
lent
.Idon’
twanttocomeoff
asmoodkill
erbutr eal
l
y,I’
m pissed.Ifeel
ahandsqueezi
ngmi neundert
hetabl
e.GoshifSazi
knewhowdanger ousandpot enthistouchwas.If
eelcal
merathistouchandri
l
edupi nawhole
dif
fer
entway.
“Ial
soneedtogethome.Icandr
opLonaof
fathomei
fshedoesn’
tmi
nd,
”Sazi
off
ersandl
ooks
atmeforaresponse.

“
Idon’
tmi
nd,
”Isayt
ooeager
lyi
fyouaskme.“
Lal
ayoudon’
tmi
ndi
fIski
p?”

“
Nobabe.Cany
ouf
etcht
heki
dst
omor
rowt
hough.
”

“
It
’sf
ineI
’
lldot
hat
.”

“
Ace,
youdon’
tmi
ndusi
ngy
ourcarr
ight
?”Sazi
asks.

“
Nahbr
uh.I
'
m cool
.”

Sazisettl
esourbill
.Theyonlyhadabeereachbuthei samanexerci
singhi
smuscl es,Idonot
argue.Onceoutsidewesaygoodby estothetr
ioandhetakesmyhandinhisandleadsmet o
hiscar.Mywhol ebodyisvibrat
ingwithneed.Iwanthi
m.Badly
.Theonlyt
hingstoppingmeis
theplati
num bandonhi sf
inger.It
sbarelyst
oppingme.Idon'
tknowhowmuchl ongerIcan
restr
ainmy sel
f.

Wedr
iveof
finsi
l
encef
orawhi
l
e.I
’
m sousedt
othi
sit
’snotev
enf
unny
.

“Doyoureal
l
ywantt
ogohomeordoy
ouwantt
ochi
l
lfi
rst
?”heasksandmyhear
trat
e
accel
erat
es.

“
Wher
edoy
ouwantust
ochi
l
l?”

“Wecangooutf
ordr
inks.Iknowt
hisexcl
usi
vepl
aceorwecangochi
l
latt
hepent
house,
”he
say
s.

“I
’
m notsur
eaboutyourpenthouse.Idon'
tthi
nki
t’
sagoodideaf
orustobeal
onet
oget
her
.”I
havet
oputitoutt
here.HethinksIam asai
ntthi
sone.I
’
m notmadeofst
eel
.
“
Real
l
y.Whyi
sthat
?”

“
Youcan’
treal
l
ybeaski
ngmet
hat
.”

“
Ipr
omi
sey
ounot
hingwi
l
lhappen.
”

“Ican’
tpr
omi
seyout
hat
.”Hei
stakenabackbymyr
esponse.Het
akesaqui
ckl
ookatmeand
backonther
oad.

“
Tot
hecl
ubt
hen.
”I’
m notsur
eifhei
ssaf
ether
eev
enespeci
all
yifI
’
m undert
hei
nfl
uence.

“
May
bey
oushoul
dtakemehome.
”

“
Imi
ssy
ou.
”Myhear
tlegi
tst
ops

“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”Ican’
tbel
i
eveIj
ustsai
dthat
.

“
Thenspendt
imewi
thme.
”

“
Okay
.”Whoam It
odenywhatt
hemanwant
s.

Wedri
veinsil
enceuntil
wegettohi
spent
house.Ther
ideontheel
evat
ori
sfi
l
ledwi
tht
ensi
on.
Wegettothepenthouseandi
t’
sasgor
geousasIremember.

“
Any
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”heasks.

“
Agl
assofwi
nepl
ease.
”

“
Comi
ngr
ightupandmakey
our
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
e.
Idoj
ustthat.Igosi
tint
hel
oungeandtakeoffmyshoes.Saziretur
nswit
hagl assofr
edwi ne
andabeerinonehand.Hecomesandsitsnextt
ome.Iswoon.Heseemsunaf fect
edthough.
Hegi
vesmet hegl
assashesi
tsbackwit
hhisonearm car
elesslyhungovert
hechairback.

“Whyareyoual
way
sdr
ivi
ngAt
hi?
”Ij
ustbl
urti
tout
.I’
m ner
vousandI
’
mtr
yingt
ofi
l
lint
he
si
lence.

“
Ah.Manyr
easons.Butt
hemostpr
eval
entaret
hathi
sli
cencehasabeensuspendedandIhav
e
t
okeepaneyeonhim.”Hewon’
tel
abor
ateandIwon'
tpr
obeanyfurt
her.

“Youar
eagoodf
ri
end.
”It
akeasi
pofmywi
ne.Iwantt
osi
tbackbuti
fIdoI
’
llber
est
ingonhi
s
arm.

“
Hehasbeenagoodfr
iendtoo.”Ther
eissomuchIdon’
tknowabouthim butI
’mint
ri
gued.I
j
ustf
eel
li
keIdon’
thav
et heri
ghttoask.“
So.Hav
eyoudecidedaboutmyoffer
.”

“
Ijustdon’
twantt
ocompl
i
cat
ethi
ngsbet
weenusSazi
.”

“Okay.Canyouatleastconsidert
hesecur
it
y.Icanal
sogety
ouapl
acequi
cker
.Apl
acey
oucan
aff
ord.You’
l
l payy
ourownr entev
en.
”

“
Findmeapl
acebuthol
dof
font
hesecur
it
ydet
ail
.Ij
ustdon’
twantsomeguyf
oll
owi
ngme.
”

“
Youwon’
tev
enknowt
heyar
ear
ound.
”

“
Icanhandl
emy
sel
fSazi
.I’
vebeendoi
ngi
tforawhi
l
enow.
”Her
aiseshi
shandsi
nsur
render
.

“
Youar
eav
eryst
ubbor
nwoman.
”

“
SoI
’
vebeent
old.
”I’
mti
redofsi
tt
ingup.SoIr
elaxback.Thecont
acti
saspot
entasIexpect
ed.
“Ja.Di
dtheyal
sotel
lyouhowhotyoulookwheny
ouar
ebei
ngst
ubbor
n.”Thatcompl
i
ment
s
shootsst
rai
ghtt
omypussy .Het
hinksI’
m hot
.

“Theynev
ermeanti
tasacompl
i
ment
.”Hi
sst
arebehi
ndt
hebeerbot
tl
eisv
eryunset
tl
ing.I
na
goodway.

“Theyshould.
”HeislookingatmylipsandI ’
ml ookingathis.Ifeelhishandbehindmyneck
gentlypul
li
ngmet owardshim.Heisleaningcloserandmyi nnerhoehei sclappi
ng.Ourfaces
areinchesapart
.Icanfeelhi
sbreathfanningmyf ace.Minei serrat
ic.Ican’
thearathingbutt
he
soundofmyhear tbeat.“
Ishoul
dn’tbedoingt his.
”Hisvoicehasdr oppedanoct ave.

“Ja,”Iwhisper.Thetouchofhisli
psagainstmi nei
ssoft.Heisstill
lookingi
ntomyeyes.Ithink
wear ebothlookingforr
eassur
ancetocont i
nue.Hegroansandl osest hefi
ghtashecaptures
myl ipsinhis.Ohhel l
!Hi
sli
psareasdelici
ousasIex pected.Hecupsmyj awinhishandand
anglemyheadt hewayhewant sashedev ourersme.Heisi nchargeandIloveit
.Mycliti
s
painfull
ythrobbing.Ther
eisaninfer
noexplodingandr unningthroughmybody .Thenthewine
spil
lswhi chbringsusbacktothepresent.

“Crap.Yoursofas!”Isayatt
empti
ngtoremovethewinestai
n.Myhandissli
ghtl
yshaking.He
takestheglassf r
om myhandandputi t
’sonthet
ablewit
hhisbeer.Ist
il
lcan’
tlookathimin
theeyeslestmyar ousalbetr
ayme.Ikeepbusywit
hthestai
nthenIfeelhi
shandsonmi ne
holdi
ngmei nplace.Thatgetsmyat
tenti
on.Mywholebodyisshaki
ng.

“Leav
et hat.
”Hisvoiceisthi
ckandlacedwitharousal.I
’m gladI’
m nott
heonlyone.“Her
e.”He
cupsfacewi thhi
shandsandhi sthumbscaressmycheeks.Ihol dontohi
sf or
earmsandkeep
eyecontact.Whenhi seyesdroptomyl i
psIloseallsenseandcl osemyeyes.Heresumes
wherehel eftof
f.I
’
m get t
ingaddi
ctedtohisl
ipsandt heinfernohasbeenr
eignit
ed.

Thistimei
t’
smor edemandingandwithurgency.I
tmirr
orsmyneed.Heispar
tial
l
ylyingov er
meandmyl egsall
owhim access.Hi
shandsar eburi
edinmyweaveandIcouldn’
tcar el
ess.My
handsarecl
awingathi
sback.Ineedmor e.Heneedstoputoutt
hefir
ethati
sburning.Ican’t
breat
h.Iwhi
mpermyneed.Il etgoofhi
slips.

“
Sazi
.Ineed.
..
please.
..
please.
”Ican’
tev
enr
ecogni
semyv
oice.

“
Whatdoy
ouneed?
”St
ars.Hewant
stoki
l
lme.
“
Ineedy
ou.
”Myv
oicei
shoar
se.

“Igotyoubaby .
”Mypussymuscl espainful
lycl
ench.Ifeelonehandpushupmydr esswi t
h
purposewhi l
etheotherholdsmyheadi nplaceashecont inuest odevourermyl ips.Oncehi s
handsr eachmypant yIopenmyl egswidertogiv
ehim bet teraccess.Whenhi shandf indsmy
wetpussyhegr oans, deep.Ineedmor eandhecansensei tashest ar
tst oopenmywetf olds
andt ouchesmyengor gedclit
.I’m soclose.I’
m cli
ngi
ngt ohi mf ordearli
fe.It
entativ
elygot o
hiserecti
on.Thefeelofhimt hroughhi spantsgivesmeami niorgasm.Hei srockhar dandt he
brotherisver
yimpressive.Istroket hel
engthofhimthr oughhi spantsandhegr oansl ouderand
histhumbbecomemor epersistent.Myclimaxdoesn’tgivemeanywar ni
ng.Ithit
smesohar d
thatItemporari
lyl
osemyconsci ousness.

WhenIcomet
ohei
shov
eri
ngabov
emewi
thaconcer
nedl
ookonhi
sface.

“AreyouOkay ?
”heasks.Inodmyhead.Hisint
enseey esquicklyscanmyface.“
Ineedadrink,
doy ou?”IjustnodIhavebeenrobbedofmyabili
tytospeak.Heget supandIseehis
i
mpr essivebulgeashedismall
ytri
esandfai
l
st odiscr
eetl
yadj usti
t.Mywholebodyisst
il
l
vibr
ating.

Hecomesbackwi
thanot
hergl
assofwi
nef
ormeandnot
hingf
orhi
m.

“I
’
m goingtotakeaqui
ckshower
.I’
l
lberi
ghtback.
”Hedoesn’
twai
tformyresponse.Iwonderi
f
heisgoingt
ot akemat
ter
sint
ohi
shands.Hedoesn’tt
akel
ongbef
oreheisback.

“
Thatwasqui
ck,
”Ir
emar
kwi
thoutev
ent
hinki
ngabouti
t.Hesmi
l
es.

“
Iwasn'
tj
erki
ngof
fift
hat
’swhaty
out
hink,
”hehasabeeri
nhandt
hist
ime.

“
Inev
ert
houghty
ouwer
e.”

“
Thatwoul
dn’tbeassat
isf
act
oryast
her
eal
thi
ngany
way
,”hesay
swhi
l
etaki
ngasi
pofhi
sbeer
.
Heevenmakesdri
nki
nglooksexy
.
“
Ihav
etogo.
”

“Fini
shy ourdrinkfi
rstthenI’l
ldropy ouoff.
”Isitbackandr el
axwi thhim nexttomeaswest ar
t
chatti
ng.Wet alkaboutany thi
ngandev er
ythi
ng.Hedeci dest obringmet hewhol ebott
leof
wineinani cebucket.I
t’shourslaterwherewef i
ndourselvesdrunkanddanci ngourl i
feaway.
Hehast rulyl
ethishairdownandi shavingfun.Ilovet
hecar efreealmostchi l
dishsi
deofhim.
Hei splay f
ulandteasesmeal ot
.Myst omachhur tsfrom eitherthelaughterortheperpet
ual
stateofar ousalIfi
ndmy sel
fin.

I
’m notsurewhenIfellasl
eepbutit’
smorningwhenmyey esfl
utt
eropenandf i
ndmy sel
finhi
s
t
ightgri
psleepi
ngont hecouch.Ibadlyneedt opee.I
’l
lhavetowakehim uptobeabletomove.
Wear efaci
ngeachot herwit
hhislegsl
ockingmei n.Hi
scouchisbigbutIwonderhowwe
managedt obot
hfitthroughouttheni
ghtorearlyhour
soft hemorni
ngrat
her.If
orgetaboutmy
f
ullbl
adderandadmi rehishandsomefacef orafewminutes.

“
It
’sr
udet
ost
are,
”hesay
swi
thhi
sey
esst
il
lcl
osedandhi
svoi
cef
ull
ofsl
eep.

“
I’
m notst
ari
ng.
”Hi
sey
esopenandcomei
ntocont
actwi
thmi
ne.Damn.Myhear
tski
psabeat
.

“Youaresuchabadli
ar.
”Mondesai
dthesamet
hingtomet heotherday
.Isi
twei
rdt
hatI
’
m
thi
nki
ngaboutherwhi
l
eI’mthear
msofsomeoneelse?Def
init
ely
.

“
Ineedt
opee,
”Isay
.

“
Doy
ouwantmet
ohol
dyourhand?
”het
eases.

“
No.Ij
ustwanty
out
oletgo.
”

“
Ican’
t.
”

“
Sur
eyoucan.SaziIneedt
ogo.Ir
eal
l
yneedt
opeel
etgo.
”
“
Don’
tsayIdidn’
twar
nyou,
”Idon’
tgetachancet
oask.Helet
sgoandimmedi
atel
yIfal
lfl
aton
myass.Lucki
l
ythei
mpacti
scushi
onedbyhiscomfor
tabl
erug.Hel
eansov
erl
ookingatme.

“
Sazi
!”Icanseehi
shol
dingi
nlaught
er.

Ev ent
uall
yhelet'
sitout.Ican’thel
pbutjoi
nhimt hough.Hislaughisinfect
ious.Hegi vesme
hishandtopullhim up.Idraghim downinst
ead.Ididn’tthi
nkthi
sthrough.Hi sbodyi snow
fl
ushedagainstmineandIf eelhi
m ever
ywhere.Wear enotlaughi
ngany mor e.Hiseyesare
scanningmyface.Mywi gissomewher eonthefloor
.Ir emembertakingitoffthepreviousni
ght
.
Atleastmyhairisneatlypl
ai t
ed.

“
Goodmor
ning,
”hi
sdeepv
oicebr
eaksmyski
nint
ogoosebumps.

“Morning,”Irespondinabr eathywhisper.Heleansdownasi finslowmot i

onuntilourl
ipsmake
contact.Ilovethefeelofhisli
psagai nstmine.Hedeepenst hekissandmyl egslockar
oundhis
waist.Thef eelofhi
ser ect
ionagainstmymounddr i
vesmecr azy .Myhandsgot owardshis
ti
ghtassandIhol dhimi nplace.Iwantmor e.Ineedtof eelhimi nsideofme.Hishandsar e
everywhereasourt onguesduel .Hemanoeuv r
eshi shandi nsidemypant i
esandcupsmywet
andsl i
pperymound.Themomenthemakescont acthegr oans.I’
m sowetr i
ghtnow.

“
Sazi
Iwanty
ou.
”Iwhi
mperagai
nsthi
sli
ps.Thehoehascomeoutandi
snotabov
ebeggi
ng.

“Wecan’ t
.”Hisvoi
ceisstrained.Hei nsert
shisfingeri
nsidemywethol ewhilefl
ickingmyclit
withhisthumb.Myi nnermuscl escont r
actattheintr
usion.Myhipsareundulati
ngashemov es
i
nandout .Headdsasecondf ingerandIneedmor ethanf i
nger
s.Heput smorepr essur
eonmy
protr
udingnubandmyt oescur lasIclimax.Imoanmyr eleaseagai
nsthisli
ps.Hedoesn’ tl
et
upunt i
lIholdhi
swr i
stinplace.Icanf eelhim st
ill
hardagainstmythigh.Myhandgoesf orhi
s
erect
ionandhehol dsitsti
llrefusingmet otouchhi m.

“I
fyoutouchme.Iwon’ tbeabl
etostop,
”hesays.“Ineedanot
hercoldshower
.”Hepl
aceshi
s
for
eheadagainstmine.Igentl
ycuphisf
acefeeli
ngt her
oughtext
ureofhisst
ubbl
e.Whycan’
tI
havehim al
ltomyself
?

“
Ial
soneedashower
,”I
’
m unashamedl
yhi
nti
ng.
“Babe.Iwil
lnotshareashowerwi
thy
ou.Iam notmadeofst
eel.
”Heper
ksmyl
i
psandget
sup.
Allt
hiserect
iongoingtowast
e.Hegi
vesmehishandandpullmeup.

“
I’
ll
gomakecof
feet
hen.
”Isaydr
aggi
ngmyf
eett
otheki
tchen.

OnceI’m doneIthinkofmaki
ngbreakfastbutI’
mt oolazy.Ichi
l
linthekit
chenandhavemy
coff
eeinsi l
ence.Hecomesbacklookingfreshinhisgreysweatpantsandav est
.Heisingr
eat
shape.Isali
vatelooki
ngathi
m.Iquicklymakehim acupashewat chesme.Het akesitt
he
samewayMondedoes.Asmi l
ecreepsupwhenIt hinkofourdatethi
safter
noon.I'
m suremy
ki
dsar eready.

“
What
’ssoamusi
ng?
”heaskst
aki
ngasi
pofhi
scof
fee.

“
Justthi
nki
ngaboutmyki
ds.Theycor
ner
edmybossi
ntoadat
ethi
saf
ter
noon.Shedi
dn’
tst
and
achance.
”Hesmil
es.

“
Thosetoowoul
dbul
l
yany
onei
ntoany
thi
ng.Youhav
elov
elyki
dsandt
heycant
alk.
”Iagr
ee
wi
thhi
m.

“Letmegoshower .
”Hei sgi
vingmeawei r
dlook.Igetoutoftheki tchenrealqui
ckandintothe
shower .WhenIcomeouthehasshortsandt-shir
tonthebedf orme.Thesear eprobabl
yhis
biggestshort
stobeableaccommodatemyassbutt heyfitwell.Iputmypant iesandadress
i
nsidemyhandbag.Ifindhim downst
air
sstandingonthebalcony .Ionlypeakoutandcallfor
him.

“
I’
mready
.”Het
urnsar
oundandl
ooksmeupanddown.Hi
sey
esdar
ken.

“
Let
sgot
hen.
”Hecl
ear
shi
sthr
oat
.

“Ineedtofetchthekidsfi
rst
.”Heagr
eesandIdirecthimtoLala’
shouse.I
’vebeencall
i
ngLal
a
thewholemor ni
ngandherphonehasbeenof f.Ibuzzatthegateandauntyopens.Themoment
thekidsseesit’
smet heycomeoutrunni
ng.Idon’tevengoin.Idon’
twanttoanswer
unnecessaryquesti
ons.Saziget
soutandopenst hedoorforthem.Icanseethecuri
osit
yon
t
heaunt
sfacebutIi
gnor
eherandj
ustwav
eather
.

“
Mor
ningki
ds,
”hegr
eet
sthem.Iwonderi
ftheyst
il
lrememberhi
m.

“MorninguncleSazi
,
”theysayi
nuni
son.Iguesstheyr
ememberhi
mt hen.Theyst
artchat
ti
ng
nonstopuntil
wegethome.Hedoesn'tj
ustdropsusoff
,hegoesi
nsi
detocheckthehouseout
befor
ehel eaves.

“
Mommyar
ewest
il
lgoi
ngwi
thAunt
yMonde?
”Khot
hat
soasks.

“
Yesweare.Let
sti
dythepl
aceupandthengetready
.”Theyar
eexci
tedt
ohelpandIsendt
hem
t
otidyt
hei
rroom.WearesupposetomeetMondeat1pm inEast
gat
e.Thatwaywecanhave
l
unchandt
henwatcha3pm mov ie.

Ipayat t
entioninchoosingmyout f
it.Idecideonshor ts,bodysui
tandanov ersizeshir
twith
sneakers.Theki dsareinthei
rshor ts, t
-shir
tsandsneaker saswell.I
t’
sal most1pm whenwe
l
eav ethehouse.Theki dscannotcont aintheirexcit
ement .Wef i
ndMondeal readywai ti
ngat
Plakarestaurant.Iguesswearenotdoi ngSpurt oday .Sheiscasuall
ydr essed6shel ooks
damnsexy .Sweatpant sandat-shirtwi thsneakers..Herbodyi sbanging.Herhai risti
edintoa
ponytail
.Nomakeup.Herski nisf l
awl ess.Theki dsr unintoherthemomentt heyspotherand
shegivest hem hugs.Iwalkunti
l Ireachher .

“
Hi.
”

“HeyLona.”Hergazei
sintense.Onacl oserlookInot
icesl
ightbagsunderhereyes.Shei
sst
il
l
beauti
ful
butsheseemst i
red.Oninst
inctIgiveherahugandshemel tsintoi
t.“
Mhm Ineeded
that
.”Shewhisper
sagainstmyneck.Weev entual
l
yletgoandsitatourtabl
e.Thekidsare
alr
eadystudyi
ngthemenu.

“
Howar
eyou?Ihav
en’
tseeny
ouf
oral
mostaweek,
”shesay
s.

“
I’
m good.Howar
eyou?
”Ican’
thel
pthesmi
l
ethatcr
eepsup.

“
I’
m bet
ternowt
haty
ouar
eher
e.”Myt
ummyf
lut
ter
s.
Chapt
er9

"
Idon'
twannabr
ag,
butI
'
llbe

Thebesty
ouev
erhad

Ihi
tyouwi
tht
hebestst
roke

Fr
eest
yleandt
hebr
east
str
oke

Ti
lyoubl
owaci
gar
ett
esmoke

Andnowt
hebed'
sbr
oke

Sowhatwegon'
donow

Roundt
wonow

Wor
kitout
,thenwecool
down,
cool
down”
-JohnLegend

I
t’
sbeenanhoursi
ncewesatdown.We’vehadourdi
nnerandarenowwatchi
ngtheki
dshave
f
unwithot
herki
dsinthepl
ayar
eajustout
sidet
herest
aurant
.I’
m abi
tconcer
nedaboutMonde
t
houghsheseemsdown.

“
Arey
ouokay
?Youseem t
ir
ed,
”Iask.Shet
akesahugesi
gh.

“I
sitt
hatobv
ious?IhopeIdi
dn'
tdampeny
ourmood.
”

“
I’
m goodj
ustwor
ri
edabouty
ou.
”Shesi
ghs.

I
'
m hav
ingi
ssueswi
thmydad.Hewant
smet
ogetmar
ri
edsot
hatIcanpr
oducechi
l
dren.
”

“Oh.Don’
tyouwantt
ogetmar
ri
edandhav
eki
ds?
”

“Ican’thaveki
dsev
eni
fIwant
edt
oLona.
”Awav
eofsadnessf
lashesacr
ossherf
aceasshe
saysthat.

“I
’
m sor
ryIasked.
”It
akeherhandi
nmi
ne.
“
Sowhatwoul
dIof
feramani
fIwer
etomar
ry?
”

“
Soar
eyoui
nter
est
edi
nbot
hsexes?
”thatseemst
odr
awheroutofhersadness.

“Yes.Ialsol
oveandenj
oydickasmuchasIdopussy
.”Suchcrudenessf
rom herseemsoutof
place.Sheburst
soutl
aughi
ng.“Youshoul
dseey
ourfaceri
ghtnow.Pri
cel
ess.”

“
It
’snott
hatI
’
m apr
ude.I
t’
sjustanyv
ulgarwor
doutofy
ourmout
hseemswei
rd.
”

“
Iknow.Y'
al
lthi
nkI
’
m pr
operbutIhav
emymoment
s.”

“
Sowhycan’
tyout
ell
yourdadt
haty
oucan’
thav
eki
ds?
”

“Ij
usthatet odi
sappointhi
m.I’mt heonlychi
ld.Ithinkhehadhopedf oraboybuti tnever
happened.Hehasmoneyandhewant smet ocarrythefamilyl
egacyforward.Bynotgetti
ng
mar r
iedandhav i
ngkidsI’
m disappoint
inghimfurther.I
t’
sjustexhaust
ing.Mewor kingat
RichardsInc.I
smywayofr ebel
li
ng.Ihatebeingtoldwhatt odo.Thathasaddedanot her
confli
ct.
”

“Whatdoesy
ourmom say
?”Ist
il
lhav
eherhandi
nmi
neandi
tfeel
sgoodt
obeabl
etor
eassur
e
her
.

“Inevermetmymot her
.Apparentl
yinherrebel
li
ousstageshewentfortheblackboy.Whenher
evidenceoftasti
ngtheforbi
ddenfrui
twasbor nshedi
tchedmeatmyf at
hersdoorstep
rel
inquishi
ngallherpar
entalr
ight
s.I’
venev ermether
.Idon’tev
enknowwhatshel ooksl
i
ke.All
Iknowi sthatsheiswhit
e.”Aahthatexpl
ainsthehai
randthecomplexion.TothinkIhadi
ssues.

“
Wow.Soy
ourf
atherr
aisedy
oual
one?
”

“
Ihadnanni
esbutmyf at
herwasalwaystheref
ormeIwon' tl
ie.Heshowedmelov
eandgave
meever
ythi
ngIneeded.I
t’
sjustt
hatheisalsocont
rol
l
ing.Enoughaboutme.Howabouty
ou.
Howareyourpar
ents?
”
“
Theywer
elov
elyandi
nlov
eunt
ildeat
hcl
aimedt
hem whenIwas16.Caracci
dent
.”

“
Ohbabe.I
’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hat
.”Shei
stheonecomf
ort
ingme.

“I
’
m okay
.Itwasal
ongt
imeago.
”

“Youwer
est
il
lyoungt
hough.Whor
aisedy
ou?
”

“Mygrandmot
her
.Whoal
sopassedonal
most7y
ear
sago.
”Shebecomesmor
esad.“I
’
m
okay
.”

“That
'swhyy
ourexf
eltt
heneedt
otakeadv
ant
ageofy
ou.Youhadnoone.
”

“Whatdoesn’tkil
lyoumakesy oustr
ongerri
ght.
”Ther ear emy ri
adsofemotionsreflect
ingi
nher
eyesrightnow.Shenodsherhead.West eertheconv ersati
ont owardsali
ghtertopic.Whenit
’s
ti
mef orthemov i
ewesettlethebi
llandgodownt otheCi nema.Wewat chanani mat i
onof
course.Thisi
snotourdate.Thekidsareecstat
ic.Ireali
set henthati
t’
sbeenawhi l
esinceI
tookthem out.Howevert
hingsarechangingnow.I ’
l
l beablet odosomeoft hethingsIcoul
dn’t
do.

Mondesit
snexttomewi t
hKhothat
soandNthat
ibymyside.Oncet
hemoviestar
tst
hekids
at
tent
ioni
scaptur
ed.Icanfeel
herl
ooki
ngatme.Shecomesclosetomyearandwhisper
s.

“Woulditbewr ongofIki
ssy ou?Iwanttosobad.”Ifeelel
ect
rif
iedasaf ri
ssonofawar eness
spreadsthroughmybody .Ishakemyheadal i
tt
le.Sheleansforwardandplaceshersof tli
pson
mine.Theki ssissoft,
tenderandohsosweet .I
t’
sdiffer
entfr
om Sazi’sandyetj ustasar ousi
ng.
Shesnakest hetipofhertongueinandtheki
ssdeepens.Ohi t’
sgood.If eelherev er
ywher e.
JustasIgeti ntoitshepull
sback.Leavi
ngmei nadaze.Ohmy .Ireal
lyl
ikedit.Sheplacesa
chastekissonmycheekandgoesbackt othemov iewithmyhandcl aspedinher s.Ist
eal a
l
ookatt hetwo.Theyar estil
lconcent
rat
ingonthemov i
e.

It
’sal
mosteveningwhent
hemoviei
soverandMondewal
ksustothecar
.Thekidscan’
tst
op
t
alki
ngabouti
t.Oncewegett
othecart
hekidsgoi
naft
ersay
ingt
heirt
hankyou’
sand
goodby
es.

“
Thanky
ouf
ort
oday
.Ihadagr
eatt
ime.Iknowt
heki
dsdi
dtoo.
”

“
It
’sbeenapl
easur
e.CanIcal
lyoul
ateron?
”sheasks.

“Il
ookforwardtoi
t.
”Shepullsmeinherar
msandgi v
esmeahug.Isoakinherscentforafew
secondsthenIl
ethergo.Shest
andsandwatchesasIst
artt
hecaranddr
iveoffwi
ththekids
wavingathernonestop.

Shemakesgoodonherpr omi setocal l

me.Shedoest hatjustasIgot osleep.Wespendhour s
tal
king.Weshar eourspeci almoment s,l
ikes,disli
kes.Any t
hingandev eryt
hing.It
’sadi f
ferent
Mondef r
om theof fi
ce.Thi scontinuesov erthenextf ewday s.Ourconv osgof rom li
ghthear t
ed
tosexuallyheated.Shei st heonet hatcallsmeatni ghtwhenwear ebothi nbed.Butt hi
ngsget
heatedupwhenwet exteachot her.It’
smor elikesext ing.Thewaysheget smeal lworkedup
thatIcan’thelpbutpl easuremy selfandIl etherknowt oo.Wedon’ tsendany thi
nggr aphicjust
thewayshedescr ibest ouchingme.Shemakesmef eel i
t.ByThursdayI’mr eadytopounceon
her.It
’ssodi f
fi
cultbei ngaroundherwi t
houtt hinki
ngofourev eni
ngchat s.Intheoffi
cet hough
i
t’sadi f
ferentMonde.Shei stheepitomeofpr ofessionalism.Wher easI ’
m alwaysf l
usteredand
allovertheplacear oundher .

Ihaven’
theardfr
om Sazisi
nceSatur
daymor ni
ng.Imisshim.I’m ashamedtoadmitthat
.Idon’
t
wanttocallhi
m.Wear enotther
eyet.Nev
er.Ihaveacourtdatethef ol
l
owingFr
iday
.Iwanted
tolethi
m know.IletMondeknowthoughassheistheonet hathelpedwit
hthewholethi
ng.

I
t’saFridayandIr eceiv
eacallfrom apropert
yagentIdon’tknow.Shei nformsmethatshehas
beeninstruct
edbyMrKhumal ot ocall
me.Shecont inuedtotel
lmet hatshehasav acantunit
formet ogov iew.It’
snottoofarfr
om EastgateinBedfordareast
il
l.Iarrangetogoafterwork.
Mondei sinDur banfortheweekend.Sheleftyester
dayforaconference.Thatall
owsmet i
me
toknockof fearlyandgov i
ewtheapar t
ment.

Il
oveit.I
t’
sclosertot heki dsdaycar e.Closertothemal laswel
l.Therearen’tmanyuni t
sinthe
complex.Theyhav eani mpr essiv
esecur i
tyaswel l.I
thast hr
eebedroomsupst ai
r sandt wo
bat
hs.Downst air
st hereisanopenpl ankitchen,dini
ngroom andal ounge.Thel oungeopens
i
ntoami nigarden.Itrulyloveit.I
t’
sjustther i
ghtsizeforus.Themont hlyrenti
sani ssue.I
t’
s
R18000.Theywi llrequireadeposi taswel l
.WhenIt hinkabouttheratesandelect r
icityi
tmight
gotoR20000.Wi thourdai lycosts.Iwill
bel ef
tbrokeev erymonth.
“Il
ovet
hispl
acebutIcan’
taf
for
dit
,”Isayr
esi
gnedl
ytot
heagent
.Shef
rowns.

“
ButMrKhumal
ohaspaidtherentupfr
ontf
ort
henexttwel
vemonths.
”Shei
sal
mostpani
cky
.
I
’
m sur
eshethi
nkshercommissioni
ssli
ppi
ngt
hroughherf
inger
s.

“Hehas?”Whyam Isurpr
ised?I
’m war
yofaccept
ingsuchhel
pthough.ItmeansI’
mjumpi
ng
fr
om onemanwhor escuedmeandt houghtheownedmet oanot
her.CouldSazi
beanot
her
potent
ial
TOS?You’l
lneverknowwithmen.

“Yes.Al
lyouneedt odoissi
gntheleasewhichisi
nyourname.Ify
oudon’twanti
taft
eray ear
wedon’trenewit
.”It’
sseemsstrai
ghtfor
ward.Il
ookatthel
ease.I
t’
sinmyname.Igot hr
oughit
andther
ei snocatchoranyt
hingli
kethat
.Isignwher
eIneedto.Shegiv
esmet hekeys.Wow.

“
Whati
fIdi
dn’
tli
ket
hispl
ace?
”

“Iwouldhavetakenyoutoanotherone.Wehav eanopenchequemam. ”Icanseetheenv

yin
hereye.Shemustt hi
nkI’
mtheslayqueenmi nusthesl
ayqueenfeat
ures.I'
m sor
eli
evedri
ght
now.Igof et
chmyki dsandtakethem outf
orsupper.

OnceI
’
m al
oneathomeIt
akeachanceandsendSaz
iamessage.

-
Thanky
ou-

Af
ewminut
eslatermyphoner
ings.I
t’
shi
m.Myhear
tst
artgal
l
opi
ng.Wi
l
ltheef
fecthehason
meev
erwanes?

“Hi
,
”myv oi
cecomesoutasabr
eat
hywhi
sper
.Ibecomesogi
rl
yinhi
spr
esence.Whet
heri
t’
sin
per
sonorother
wise.

“
Hey
.”Hi
sdeepv
oicesendsmybodyi
naf
renzy
.Icl
earmyt
hroat
.
“
Isawt
heagentt
oday
.Thel
easei
ssi
gnedandIhav
ethekey
sal
ready
.Thanky
ou.
”

“
It
’smypl
easur
eLi
namandl
a.”Ican’
thel
pbutgi
ggl
e.Noonecal
l
edmet
hatexceptf
ormydad.

“
Ijustcan’
thel
pthi
nkofwhatt
hecatchi
s.Noonecanbet
hisgener
ouswi
tht
hei
rmoney
wi
thoutexpect
ingany
thi
ngi
nretur
n.”

“Li
sten.Iknowy oudon’tknowmewel lenough.I’
vebeenatt hebottom andI’
vehadpeoplehelp
meout .Iknowwhati t’
sliketolosehopeonl ytobesavedbyanunl ikel
ysource.I
t’swhatIdo
Lona.Ipaveitforward.EvenifIwasn'tat
tractedtoyou,I
’
dst il
lhel
py ouout.Onethinghas
nothi
ngt odowi t
ht heother.Theonlythi
ngy ouneedtodof ormei stopaveitforwardaswell
wheny oucan.”I’
m holdingbackmyt earsrightnow.Iwouldlovetoknowwher ehecamef r
om.
Whatmadehi mt hemanhei stoday
.

“
Lona.Ar
eyoucr
ying?
”Ther
eisahi
ntofconcer
ninhi
stone.Isni
ff
.

“
No.
”OkaynowI
’
m cr
ying.Si
ncewhendi
dIbecomeacr
ybaby
.

“
Comeonbabydon’
tdot
hat
.IfIwasar
oundIwoul
dcomet
her
ebutI
’
m not
.”Icomposemy
sel
f.

“
I’
mfi
ne.Wher
ear
eyou?
”

“
I’
m awayonbusi
ness.
”I’
m cal
mernow.

“
Thanky
ouagai
nSazi
.”

“Youar
ewelcome.Weneedtodi
scussy
oursecuri
tywhenIcomeback.I
’m nott
aki
ngnof
ora
answer
.If
oundsomedist
urbi
ngnewsaboutyourex.Weneedyousaf
e.”

“
Whatnews?
”
“Hei
snotwhoy out
hinkhei
s.Themani
sdanger
ous.I
’
llgi
vey
oudet
ail
swhenIgetback.When
canIseeyou?
”

“
Letmeknowwhenyouarebackt
henwewi
l
lar
range.
”NgaphanguSazi
ngaphanguMonde.
I
’
m sur
pri
singmy
sel
feven.

“
Ihav
etogo.Goodni
ght
.”

“Goodnight.
”Hehangsup.Ihav eamessageonmyphone.I t’
sMondebi ddingmegoodnight.I
guesstherewon’tbeanysext i
ngtonight.Ir
epl
yonhermessage.IgothertouseWhat sApp.
Shehadnev eruseditbefore.Whodidn’tuseWhat
sApp?Idecidetosleep.Iam i
nter
viewi
nga
potent
ialnannythef
ollowingmor ni
ng.Shecomeshighl
yrecommended.

It
’saSat urdayandI ’m donewi t
hthenanny .Il
ikeher.Sheisamat ureladywhohasexper i
ence.
Herpr eviousempl oyerlethergobecauset hechildr
enwereol deranddi dn’trequir
eananny .
Theygav eagl owingreference.Sheisr eadytost ar
tonMondayandshewoul dbealive-
in
nanny .Ialsoneedt omov ebutdecideIwoul ddot hatthefoll
owi ngweekaf terthecourtcase.
Myl awy ertell
smei tsast raightf
orwardcase.Ishouldbeawar dedmyhouseaf ter
wardsand
Tsietsiwoul dbechar gedf ornotpayingmai nt
enance.Iwon'tbepr essi
ngchar gesforassault
therestraini
ngor derisenough.Hewi ll
onlygetsuper vi
sedv i
sitswi t
hthekids.Thecour t
appointedt heperson.Thatmeansmeandhi m don’
tneedt oseeeachot her.

Thefol
lowi
ngweekisabl
ur.Idon’
tgett
oseeSazi
asheimmedi at
elyhast
ogoonanot
her
busi
nesstr
ip.Mondei
sal
sobusyatwork.Sowehardl
yseeeachother.

I
tisnotunt
ilWednesdayt
hatIgett
oseeheri
nherof
fi
ce.Iwai
tunti
lev
ery
oneisgonei
nour
f
loorandgoint
oheroffi
ce.Shei
sbusyonherl
apt
opbutli
ft
sherheadasIcomein.

“
Youar
est
il
lher
e?”Sheget
supandwal
kst
owar
dsme.

“Iwantedtochecki
fyouneededany
thi
ngbefor
eIl
eft,
”IsayasIcomeinandcl
oset
hedoor.I
remainrootedonthespot
.Whenshereachesmeherhandgoesbehi
ndmeandshelockst
he
door.

“Ineedthi
s.”Bef
oreIcoul
dsayanyt
hingshecupsmyfacewit
hhersofthandsandgi v
esmea
ki
ss.Idon’
tneedanotheri
nvi
tet
oreci
procat
e.Herl
ipst
astesweetandtangy.Ipul
lhercl
osert
o
me.Hersoftwomanlycurvesareacontrasttot
hehar
dmal eI’
m usedtobutfeelj
ustasdivine.I
canfeel
mybr eat
hingchange.Herhandsgodownandunbut t
onmybl ouseunti
lmyl ace
cover
edboobsarebaredtoher.I’
m onlyhappyIal
wayswearmybestunder wear.Shestands
backasshelooksatthem appreci
ati
velyforaf
ewseconds.

“Thesearegorgeous.”I
’
m standi
ngherewi thmykneesshaki ng.“Ihavetodot hi
s.”Shehasmy
nippl
eoutofmybr aandinhermouthbefor eIcouldutt
eraresponse.Thef eeli
ngfrom my
nippl
esendsasi gnalst
rai
ghttomycooki e.Shefli
cksthenipplewithhertonguewhi le
caressi
ngtheotherone.Sheknowsexact lyhowt ohandleboobs.Sheappl i
esther i
ghtamount
ofpressurewhenneeded.WhenI ’
m aboutt oprot
estsonbehal foftheothertwinsheattendst
o
i
t.AllIcandoisuncli
pherhairandleti
tloosewhi l
eIholdherheadi npl
ace.

“MmmhMonde.Thatfeel sgood.
”Shelooksupwi thneedref
lectedi
nhereyes.Shegr absmy
handandpull
smetowar dsthecouch.Oncet hereshegentl
ypushesmedownandgoesonher
kneesi
n-bet
weenmylegs.Igetawhi f
fofmyar ousalassheopensmef urt
her.Thenshesi t
s
backonherheel
sandadmi remypussy .Her
eIam si tt
ingwit
hl egswi
deopenl i
keasacr i
fi
cial
l
ambwi t
hmybossadmi ringthevi
ewherhai rlooseandherey eswil
dwitharousal.If
eelmy
vagi
nacontr
acti
nanti
cipati
on.Shecaressesmypant ycl
adpussyandmyassl i
ftsoffthecouch.

“
Youaresowet.I
st hisf
orme? ”Shewhi
sper
swhi
l
eherf
inger
srunupanddownmypussy
.
Woul
dshestopteasingthough.

“
Yes.I
t’
sal
lfory
oubabe.
”Ipant
.

Shel
eansdownandt
akesahugewhi
fft
henmakesanappr
eci
ati
vesound.

“
Ihav
en’
tbeenwi
thawomani
nal
ongt
ime.Thi
slooksper
fect
.”

“
WellIhav
en’tbeenwithawomanev erandI
'dappr
eci
atet
hatmyf
ir
stwomanst
opst
ort
uri
ng
me.
”Imbatyowillhav
ey ouspeaki
ngi
ntongues.

“
Wel
lIcan’
thav
eyouwai
ti
ngnowcanI
?”

Shegoesandpul ldownmypant iesandIli

ftmyasst omakei teasi
erf
orher.Shetakesthem
offandthrowsthem carel
essl
ytotheside.If
eelselfconsci
ousforaspli
tsecond.Iknowit’
s
neat.Idowax.Ineverli
ketoomuchhai rdownthere.Phelasheisanexpectonvaginashehas
one.“Fuckme.Thislooksgorgeous.
”Justli
kethatI’
m drenched.Herfi
ngersrunthrough
openi
ngmyfol
dsandIr
ememberSazi
doi
ngt
hesamet
hing.Myar
ousal
goesupanot
ch.What
thehel
li
swr
ongwithme?

Thesightofherwat chingmypussyl i
ket hatdriv
esmemad.Whenshef i
nal
l
ygoesdownand
takesaswi peatmycooki ewi t
hhert ongue, Iscream.It hrowmyheadbackandenj oyt he
sensations.Hertonguegamei sfire.Sheknowspussyt hisoneandshecanr eallyeati tgood
too.Whensheaddsherf inger stohert onguegameI ’
m done.Icomeundoneandexpl odeinto
anintenseor gasm.Shel icksmeunt i
lI
’m cleanandt hencomesupl ickingherl i
ps.Shegi vesme
awetki ssthatisstil
lfullofneed.Icant astemy selfonherandIl ovei t
.Whileki ssingIputmy
handunderherski rtintoherpant ies.Fuck!Shei sn’twear i
ngany .Theheatcomi ngf r
om her
coreisinsane.Shei sasaf fectedasIam.Shemoansagai nstmyl i
pswhenIt ouchherwetcor e.
Thisisbey ondwet .Shecl ingstomeasIpl aywi thher .Itdoesn’ttakesherlongbef oreshef all
s
apartinmyar ms.Idrownherscr eamswi thmyki sses.Ionl yletgowhenshest ar t
swhi mpering.
ThenIl i
ckmyl i
psasshewat ches.Herf acei sfl
ushedandherey esl ookwild.Gor geous.

Wef
ixourcl
othesi
n-bet
weenki
ssesunt
ilwear
edone.

“
Thatwasr
eal
l
ygood,
”Isay
.

“I
’
m glady
ouenjoyedit
.Youtaster
ealgoodtoo.
”It
’smyturntobl
ush.“
Don’
tbeembarr
assed.
That
’sme,I’
mveryvocalaboutmyfeel
ings.
”SoI’
venot
iced.Shei
sahoeinthebedr
oom thi
s
one.

“
Ihav
etogo.Whenar
eyoucomi
ngback?
”

“ProbablyonTuesday.I
t’
saseri
esofmeetingsandwor kshopsweareatt
endi
ng.Iwishy ou
couldcomewi th.
”IwishIcoul
dtoobutwit
ht henewnannyI ’
m notascomfor
tabl
eleavingmy
kidsjustyet
.It
ellherasmuch.Shewalksmet othedoorandgivesmeanotherwetkissjust
beforeIleav
e.

“
I’
ll
missy
ou,
”Isay
.

“
I’
ll
cal
lyouev
ery
day
.”Onel
astki
ssandI
’
m gonewi
thaper
manentsmi
l
eonmyf
ace.

(
Excuset
heer
ror
s.)
Chapt
er10

“I
t'
syourbody

Youcany
ell
ify
ouwantt
o

Loudi
fyouwantt
o

Scr
eam i
fyouwantt
o

Justl
etmel
ovey
ou

Layr
ighther
egi
rl

Don'
tbescar
edofme

Gi
vey
ousext
her
apy

Gi
vey
ousext
her
apy

I
t'
syourbody

We'
l
lgohar
dify
ouwantt
o

Ashar
dasy
ouwantt
o

Sof
tasy
ouwantt
o

Justl
etmel
ovey
oul
ayr
ighther
e

I
'
llbey
ourf
ant
asy

Gi
vey
ousext
her
apy

Gi
vey
ousext
her
apy
”-Robi
nThi
cke

I
t’
saFr i
dayandI’
mi ncour
t.Onegoodt
hingi
sthatIhav
eananny
.Theki
dsl
i
keher
,Il
i
keher
.
Ourenergyi
sinharmony.

Gregseemsconfi
dentt
hatt
hingswi
llgoourway.Ifeelt
ir
edthough.Ispenthal
ftheni
ghton
thephonewit
hMonde.Shetr
iedtol
aymyf ear
storestbygiv
ingmet hereassur
anceIneeded.I
event
uall
yfel
lasl
eepwi
thaphoneagainstmyear
.

Iwi
shshewashere.I
t’
sonlybeenafewweeksofknowi
ngherbutIf
eel
herabsence.Yest
erday
wasalongdayi
ntheoffi
cewit
houther
.Thati
snotri
ght
.Idon’
tli
ket
ohavesuchanemot i
onal
connect
ionwi t
hapersonsosoon.Onceyoustartl
abel
l
ingthenexpect
ati
onswil
lri
se.Then
moreofwhatI ’
m abl
etoprov
idewil
lberequi
red.Iwoul
dliketokeepwhatwehaveascasualas
possi
bleifIcan.

TheTOSkeepst hrowingdaggersatme.Idon’tevenfli
nchhedoesn'tscareme.Isitandlist
en
tomylawyerli
sti
ngal lhi
scri
mes.JustthenIfeelsomeone’spresencebehindme.Ican’thelp
butt
oturntolook.It’
sSaziinasuit
.Fuck.Heneedst obepaidjustforhi
sgoodl ooks.He
smil
eswhenourey esmeetandIcan’thelpbutret
urnthesmile.Myheartbeataccelerat
es.I
t’s
socomfort
ingtohav ehim onmyside.Hel i
ter
aryhasmybackashei ssit
tingr
ightbehindme.

WhenItur
nbackar oundIcatchTsi
etsi
glar
ingatme.I
flookscoul
dki
l
lI’
dbedead.Il
i
ftmychi
n
andgl
areri
ghtback.Angany
a!

Thecourtcontinueswit
ht heproceedings.Hi
slawyertriesandfai
lst
odefendhi scli
ent.His
parent
saresitti
ngbehindhi m wi
thdisapprovi
nglooksdi r
ect
edatme.Idon’treall
ygiveashit.
Theywerenev ermypar ents.OhMinkyi sal
soinattendanceslayi
ngasusual.It
houghtt hey
wereoverwitht hewaytheTOShadbeenact ingl
atelytowardsme.

Thejudgegiveshi
sjudgment.Tsi
etsihastopayoverR300000ofthemai ntenancemoneyhe
ski
ppedon.Gr egmylawyerhasthepapersdrawntot r
ansf
ertheowner
shi pofthehouse.The
courtassi
gnsapersonwhowi l
lfaci
li
tatet
hevisi
tat
ionsunt
ilf
urt
hernot
ice.Tsietsisi
gnst
he
papersandwear edi
smissed.

AssoonasIgetupSaziisal
readybymysi deenv
elopi
ngmei
nhi
sar
ms.Ii
nhal
ehi
sdi
vi
ne
scentandl
etmysel
frel
ax.JustwhatIneeded.

“
It
’sov
er,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Notbyalongshot
,”hi
sdeepv oicevi
brat
esagai
nstmynecksendi
ngshi
ver
sdownmyspi
ne.
“Hewon’tgiv
einthateasybutfornowwecelebr
ate.
”

“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
”

Hel
etsgoofmeandj
ustasI
’
m aboutt
oint
roducehi
mtoGr
egIseet
hathei
sbusywi
tht
he
j
udge.

“
Let
sgocel
ebr
atey
ourv
ict
ory
,”hesay
s.

“Okay.Letmejustsaygoodby
et omyl
awyerf
ir
st.
”Helet
’smegoandIsayaquickgoodbyet
o
Greg.WhenIret
urnhetakesmyhandinhi
sandleadsmeoutoft
hecour
troom.Icanfeel
Tsiet
si’
seyesonustheenti
reti
me.

“
SoGr
egi
syourl
awy
er?
”

“
Yes.Youknowhi
m?”

“
Yes,
Iusehi
mfr
om t
imet
oti
me.
”

“
Oh.Thenwhydi
dn’
tyousayhi
?”Iask.

“
Heknowsmywi
fet
oo.
”If
rown.Wear
ewal
ki
ngt
owar
dst
hepar
kingar
ea.

“
Whyi
sthatapr
obl
em?It
houghty
out
oldy
ourwi
feev
ery
thi
ng.
”

“
Likemaki
ngy
oucum orspendi
ngni
ght
swi
thy
ou?Thatsor
toft
hing?
”

“
Okaymay
benott
hat
.Whywoul
ditbeani
ssuet
ogot
ocour
tforaf
ri
end?
”

“
Youarenotjustafr
iendany
mor eLona.
”Wearebyhi
scarandheopensthedoorformet
oget
i
n.OnceI
’m sett
ledhegoesaroundandget
sin.Hedoesn’
tst
artt
hecari
mmediately
.

“
Sazi
Idon’
twantt
ocompl
i
cat
ethi
ngsbet
weeny
ouandy
ourwi
fe.
”Mydai
l
ymant
ra.

“
Thi
ngsar
eal
readycompl
i
cat
ed.Anycasel
etmedeal
wit
hthat
.Whatt
imear
eyousupposet
o
f
etcht
heki
ds?
”

“
Any
timereal
l
y.It
ookadayof
ftodaysoIwasgoi
ngt
odosoi
mmedi
atel
yaf
tercour
t.Whydo
y
ouask?”

“
Iwantt
otakey
ousomewher
e.I
tsabi
tfarandwemi
ghtt
akel
onger
.”

“
Icanpi
ckt
hem upanddr
opt
hem of
fathome.Ihav
eananny
.”

“
Great
.Whydon'
tyougopi
ckupt
heki
ds.I
’
llpi
cky
ouup,
let
’ssayi
n,
”hecheckshi
sti
me.

“
Twohour
s.”Hel
ooksatme.

“
Okayt
hent
hatshoul
dbef
ine.Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngme?
”

“
It
’sasur
pri
se.
”

“
Ineedt
oknowwhatt
owear
.”

“
Becomf
ort
abl
e.Thi
nkoutdoor
s.”

“
Ohokay
.”I
’
m notpar
ti
cul
arl
yaf
anofany
thi
ngout
door
.ButIwon'
ttel
lhi
mthat
.

Het
akesmetomycarandwait
sformetostar
tandpul
loutoft
hepar
kingl
ot.If
ir
stgof
etch
t
heki
dsandt
henbuythem f
oodaft
erwar
ds.

I’
mi nmyr oom andI ’
mt ryi
ngt opickanout fi
tthati
scomf ortableandyetf
latteri
ng.Ev
ent uall
yI
sett
leonj eggingsandanov er
lappingt-shi
rt
.Iwearmycur lywig.I’
minneedofanewhai rsty
le
though.Thewi gsal
thoughconv enientaren’
tmyf avouri
tething.Ial
waysli
ket ohavemyhai r
sewni n,plai
tedorbraided.Iplanondoi ngthattomorrow.Iwearmysneaker s.Theyare
comf ort
ablef orwal
kingandr unning.I’
m hoppingtherewon’tbeal otofwalkinganddefinitel
y
norunning.
Exactl
yintwohour
shei
sout
sidemyhouse.Ibi
dtheki
dsgoodby
eandl
eav
eaunt
ywi
thaf
ew
i
nstruct
ions.

AssoonasIgetoutoft
hegat
ehecomesoutoft
hecar
.Heal
way
sdoest
his.Hegoesar
ound
andopenst
hedoorforme.

“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul,
”hesay
soncehei
sinsi
det
hecar
.

“
Thanky
ou.
”Wear
esi
l
entf
orawhi
l
eashemanoeuv
rest
hrought
raf
fi
c.

“Theotherdayy
ousaidt
her
ewasmoret
oTsiet
si t
hanmeet st
heey
e.Whatdi
dy oumean?”he
glancesatmeandbackont
her
oadanddoesn’
trespond.I
tsafewminut
esl
aterwhenhe
speaks.

“
Howmuchdoy
ouknowabouthi
m Lona?
”

“
LikeI’
m notsur
ehowt
oanswert
hatquest
ion.It
houghtIknewhi
m buthi
sbehav
iourl
atel
yis
weir
d.”

“
Howmuchdoy
ouknowabouthi
sbusi
ness?
”

“Thatherunshi
sf at
her
sbusinessmostl
y.TheyhaveachainofBnB,i
ntof
armi
ngbackhomei
n
Botswanaandaf ewbutcher
ies.Whyal
lthesequest
ions?
”hesighs

“
Yourexi
snotwhoy
out
hinkhei
s.Hi
sfat
herev
en.Theyar
ethugsi
nsui
t,
”hesay
s.

“
Howdoy
ouknowal
lthi
s?”ImeanIwaswi
tht
hemanf
orsi
xyear
sandnev
erknewal
lthi
s.

“Canwegett owherewearegoi
ngfir
st,
thenI
’
llt
ell
y ou?
”Ijustnodmyhead.Welist
ent
ohis
play
li
stwhichIthor
oughl
yenj
oy.Somesingal
ongaswel l
.Oneandahalfhourl
aterwegett
o
ourdest
inati
on.WeareatBudmarshinMagal
i
esberg.
“
You’
vebr
oughtmet
oal
odge?
”

“Waitandsee.”Heistoochi
ll
ed.Wegettothi
sst
unni
nglodgeandhegi vesthem hisnameat
therecepti
on.Theoneladyl
eadsustowherewearesupposedtobe.Wewal kabi tunti
lwef
ind
apicnicsetupit
’soverl
ooki
ngari
verandfaci
ngt
hesunset.I
’m chuf
fed.Il
ovethi
ski ndof
outdoor.

“
Thi
sisamazi
ng.I
sitf
orus?
”

“Yes.Comesi
t.
”Theladyt hatwasescortingushasdisappeared.Abl
ankethasbeenl
aidonthe
greenlawnwi
thahugepi cnicbasketnexttoit
.Afewscat t
eredcushi
onsaswelltor
eston.
Thereisal
soanicebucketwi t
hachampagnebot tlei
nside.

It
akemyshoesof
fandr
elaxandSazi
doest
hesame.Hehadchangedi
ntocomf
ort
abl
ecl
othes
aswel
l
.

“
Champagne?
”

“
Yespl
ease,
”Isay
.

Hepour smeaglassandal soforhi

msel
f.Weopenthepi
cni
cbaskett
ofi
ndallsor
tsofgoodi
es.
From assor
tedcheesetocoldmeats,af
ewsalads,
homemadebread,
sandwi
chesandli
ttl
e
chocolat
ebrowniesfordeser
t.

“
Thi
sisal
ot!
”Ir
emar
k.

“Idon’
tknowabouty
ou,
butI
’
m hungr
y.”Hest
art
sdi
shi
ngupf
orusandt
henwer
elaxwhi
l
ewe
eat.

“
Thi
splacei
ssobeaut
if
ulandpeacef
ul,
”Isay
.Thesuni
sst
il
lhi
ghup.Thet
all
treespr
ovi
det
he
wel
comeshade.
“
Iknow.Ri
ght
.Iwant
edust
otakeawal
kaf
terweeat
.Ar
eyouupf
ort
hat
?”

“
Wit
hal
lthi
sfoodImi
ghtneedt
heex
erci
se.
”Not
.

Wechatf orawhileunti
lmycuriosi
tygetst
hebetterofme.Especi
allyaft
erthesecondgl assof
champagne.Ifeelbrav
e.Wear ebothlyi
ngonourbacksalongsideeachot herwatchingthe
cl
earbluesky.JustasI’
m abouttoaskhim aboutourear
li
erconversat
ionmyphoner ings.I
t’
s
Monde.Ifeelapangofguiltf
ormoment .Thenagai nwhyshoul
dIbegui lt
y?Wehav en’tl
abell
ed
anyt
hing.Wit
ht hi
sonenexttome, Idon’
treal
lyowehim anyloy
alty
.Ianswert hecal l
.

“
Hi.
”Herv
oicemakesmemi
ssher
.Thi
sisnotgood.

“
Hi.
”Ir
espond.If
eel
Sazi
tensi
ngnextt
ome.

“I
'
vebeenmeani
ngt
ocally
ou.I
’
vejustbeenstuckinmeet
ingsthewholeday
.Ijusthadt
ost
ep
outf
oramomentsoIcoul
dcal
lyou.Icoul
dn’
twaitanyl
onger.Howareyou?”

“
I’
mfi
ne.Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m good.Howdi
ditgoi
ncour
t?”

“
Itwentwel
l
.”Ibr
iefheronwhathappened.

“Ohwow.That
’sgoodnews.Iwi
shIwast
her
eandwecoul
dcel
ebr
ate.
”Someoneel
sei
sway
aheadofy
ou.

“
Wewi
l
lwheny
oucomeback.
”

“
Ican’
twai
t.May
beweshoul
dbot
htakeadayof
f.Spendt
hewhol
edayt
oget
her
.How’
sthat
?”

“
Youar
etheboss.
”Idon’
tknowhowt
oel
abor
atewi
thoutbei
ngawkwar
d.
“
Arey
ouokay
?Yousoundwei
rd,
”sheasks.

“
I’
m okay
.”

“
Imissyou.
”Ther
eisnoav
oidi
ngt
his.Onei
tscar
esmet
hatImi
sshert
hismuchbutIdo.I
t’
s
t
oosoon.

“
Imi
ssy
out
oo.
”

“
I’
llcal
lyoul
atert
hen.Letmegetbackt
omymeet ing.
”Shehangsup.Ican’
tev
enlookatSazi
r
ightnow.Heheardmysi deoft
heconv
ersat
ionbutI’
m sur
eit
’senought
oputthepi
eces
t
ogether.

“
So.Youar
eseei
ngsomeone?
”mor
eli
keast
atementt
hanaquest
ion.

“
”Sor
tof
?”I
’
m notgoi
ngt
oli
e.

“
Whatdoy
oumeansor
tof
?”Isi
gh.Hesi
tsupandbal
anceshi
sheadwi
thhi
shandl
ooki
ngat
me.

“
Idon’
twantt
olabel
itj
usty
etbutt
her
eissomet
hingbet
weenmybossandI
.”Hi
sey
eswi
den.

“
Yourboss!Yourf
emal
eboss?
”

“Yes.I
tjuststar
ted.She’
slikesmeandonedayonet
hingl
edt
oanot
her
.”Hel
i
esbackdownand
covershisfacewithhishands.

“Doyouli
keher?
”Icanbar
elyhearhi
m.I
t’
smyt
urnt
osi
tuponmysi
deheadbal
ancedonmy
hand,Il
ookdownathi
m.
“I
’
llbehonestwithyou.Ido.
”Hisjawclenches.Hei
squietf
orawhi
let
oapointi
tmakesme
uncomfort
able.Hiseyesarest
il
lclosedandhehashisheadonhi
shands.

I’
mf ul
landthef
oodwasdel
i
ciousbutt
her
eisst
il
ldeser
t.Iwantt
ohav
esomebutI
’
m af
rai
dto
evenmov e.

“Il
ikeyou.Ir
eall
ydo.Ial
soknowthatIhavenori
ghttohaveyouortoevenasky outobe
exclusi
ve.I
tsuckst
hatIcan’
tof
fermyselft
oyou.”Iwasn'
treadyf
orthatdecl
arati
on.Myhear
t
i
sbeat i
ngfaster
.

“
Ili
key
ounam Sazi
.Buty
ouknowt
hisneedst
oend.I
t’
snotdoi
ngany
oneanyf
avour
s.”

“That’
swhatIcan’
timagi
ne,mylif
ewithouty
oubuti
t’
sinev
itabl
e.”Her
emai
nswi
thhi
sey
es
closed.Her
eall
yhaslongey
elashes.

“
Iknow.
”That
’sal
lIcansay
.

“
Doessheknowaboutme?
”

“Idon'
tseeanyr
easont
otel
lher
.”Hewon’
tbei
nmyl
i
fef
orl
ongany
way
.Heopenshi
sey
esand
oureyesmeet.

“
I’
m notr
eadyt
olety
ougo,
”hesay
s.I
’
m notr
eadyei
therbuti
thast
obedone.We’
vegonet
oo
f
arasis.

“I
thastobedone.”Hecont
inuest
ostareatme.Thenhesnakeshisar
m aroundmyneckand
pull
smedown.Ilosemybalanceandlandontopofhi
m.Hecupsmyf acewi thbothhandsand
hi
sey esscanmyface.Wearesocl
oset oeachot
her
.Icanfeel
hiswarm breathonmyf ace.

“Youaresobeaut
iful.I
nsideandout.
”Hegrowls.Iswall
owal umpinmyt hr
oat.Mywhol ebody
i
sst r
ungti
ghtwit
hant i
cipati
on.Whenhiseyesdroptomyl i
psIknowI ’
m cl
osetotasti
ngmy
sweettor
tur
e.Whenourl ipsmeetther
eisanelectr
if
yingfeel
ingt
hatgoesthroughmybody .I
restmyhandsonhi schestforbal
anceashi
smout hexploresmine.Thi
sfeelsgood.Toogood.
Icanf eelourbreathi
ngchangeasthekissdeepens.Hefli
psmeov erannowhei st heoneon
top.Hehashi sthi
ghwedgedbetweenmi neandIfeeltheevidenceofhisarousalagainstmy
thigh.Thei nf
ernobuil
dingi
nmycor ei
snotlett
ingup.Myhandscl awathi sbackbringinghi
m
closer.Thekissislesscoor
dinat
edandneedier.Iwanthim sobad.Myhandsar eonhi sass
bringingclosertomyneed.Ineedmore.Iwanthimi nsi
deofme.Ihav etohav ehim orI’l
ldi
e.

Thenasi ffr
om adistanceIhearaphoner i
ng.Hedoesn’tstop.Hisfull
ont opofmer ightnow
andourbodi esarefl
ushedtogether
.Thereisnotevenani nchseparatingus.Icanfeelhis
erect
iondiggingagainstmymoundandI ’
mf al
l
ingapar
t.Thephoner i
ngsagain.It
’snotmi neso
Iknowi t
’shis.Hestopstheki
ssingandrestshisfor
eheadagai nstmine.Hisbreat
hingisas
l
abour edasmi ne.

“Hell
o.”Damnhisvoiceissexywhenheisar
oused.Ist
il
lfeel
himt
wit
chi
ngagai
nstmeandmy
coreclenchespai
nful
ly.Iknowmypanti
esar
edrenched.

“NahbabyI ’
mfi
ne.Whydoy ouask?”Baby
?Mybodytensesandf
eelsi
cecol
datt
hat
statement.Hef
eel
sthechangeandgetsoffmewhil
elooki
ngatme.Ther
eal
it
yhi
tsmehar
d
thatthi
sissomeone’
sbaby.Someone’
shusband.

“I’
mi nMagali
es.
”“I
’l
ltellyouwheny oucomeback.”“Howar ey
ou?”How'syourtri
p?”“
Iknow”“I
knowt hatt
oo.”“
Wewi lldiscussi
twheny ougetback.”“
Ilov
eyoutoo.
”Ifeelaknif
espeari
ng
throughmyheartasIlistentothi
sonesidedconversati
on.Helov
esher.Ofcoursehedoes.
WhatwasIexpect i
ng.Hisey esarehoodedashelockshisphoneandputsitbackinhi
spocket.

“
I’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
oheart
hat
.”

“
Noneedt
oapol
ogi
se.
”Ishoul
d'
vewal
kedawaybutmycur
iosi
tygott
hebet
terofme.

“Howaboutt
hatwal
k?”heasksashegetsonhisfeet
.Hegivesmehi
shandandhel
psmeup.
Mybodyisst
il
lwoundti
ghtwit
harousal
.Thecal
lmighthav
edampenedthei
nfer
nobuti
tdi
dn’
t
puti
tout
.

Wewal kf
orawhil
einsi
lenceal
ongtheri
ver
.Hekeepsthrowi
ngrocksontheri
ver
.That
di
stur
bsthet
ranqui
ll
i
tyofthepl
ace.Ther
eisdi
ff
erentt
ypesofbi
rdsthatf
lyawayfr
om t
he
i
ntrusion.Thegr eeneryandt heassortedf l
ower salongtheri
verbedarequi t
easight.Aswe
walkwet akeadet ourint
ot hebeautifulgardens.Thesmal l
colourf
ulcutebutter
fl
iesdanceal
l
aroundt heenv i
ronmentlooki ngforsweetnect arjustasIwasaf ewmi nutesago.Thefl
ower’
s
fr
agr ancefill
sthewhol eairmakingmewantt ojustlayonthegreenlushlawnandsoaki tal
li
n.
Het akesmyhandi nhisaswewal kinsilence.I
t’snotawkwardasusual .Iknowheisdeepin
hi
st hought s.Ir
efusetothinkf ur
therthant hi
s.

Thesunisgoingdownaswer et
urnt
oourpi
cnicspotcr
eat
inganor
angegl
owacr
osst
he
hor
izon.Thesoundofchi
rpi
ngbir
dsbecomesoothi
ngmusict
omysoul.

“Icouldstayinthisplacejustforitsnatur
alspl
endourandbeauty
,”Isaybr
eaki
ngthesi
lence.
Heonl yglancesatme.Il i
ket hefeel ofmyhandinhis.Mi
nedeli
cateandti
ny.Hi
sbigandstrong.
Ifeelsafeandpr otectedwhenI ’
m wi thhi
m.Ifeel
li
keagirlandhi
m myPr i
nceCharmi
ng.Only
heisnotmi ne.Hei ssomeoneel se’sPri
nceCharming.

“
Idon’
twantt
hisdayt
oend,
”hesay
sasweappr oachourpicni
carea.Hepassesmeabot
tl
eof
wat
erandget
soneforhi
msel
f.Wesitbackandenj
oythesunset.

“
Met
oo.
”

“
Maybewecanst
ayt
heni
ghtatt
hel
odge.
”

“
Yout
hinki
t’
sagoodi
deat
odancewi
tht
empt
ati
onl
i
ket
hat
?”Iask.

“
No.I
t'
sat
err
ibl
eideabutIwantt
o.”

“Letmecallt
henanny .
”Hiseyesl
ightup.Ical
lnannyLy
diaandletherknowt
hatIwon’
tbe
comingback.It
’snotanissuewit
hher.Shecookedandthekidsarefi
neshesay
s.

“
Ever
ythi
nggood?
”heasksassoonasIhangup.

“
Sor
ted.
”
“
Alr
ightl
et’
sgobooki
nthen.
”

“Canyounotcal
lthem whi
lewesoakupt hi
sbeauti
fulsunset
?”henodshisheadandt
akesout
hisphone.Hel
aysmyheadonhi schestaswer el
ax.Whenhei sdonewi
ththecal
lheput
shis
armsaroundme.Iam cocoonedinhisscentandit
'sdeali
ngwithmysenses.

“
Wear
eal
lset
,”hesay
s.

“
Tel
lmeaboutTsi
etsi
.”If
eel
hischestr
iseandf
all
ashesi
ghs.

“Ihav
etogobacktot
hebegi
nni
ngf
oryout
ounder
stand.I
t’
ssomet
hingIdon’
ttal
kabout
.My
past.
”Hi
stonefi
l
lsmewit
htr
epi
dat
ion.

“I
t’
sokay.Imeani
t’
sfi
nei
fyoudon’
twantt
ospeakabouti
t.I
’
llunder
stand.
”If
eel
li
kegi
vi
ng
hi
m apass.

“Youhavetheri
ghttoknow.It’
sbestcomingfr
om me, ”het akesadeepsigh.“maybeweshoul
d
gocheckinfi
rst.Thi
smighttakeuslonger.
”Heisstal
lingbutIal l
owhimthetimeheneeds.He
getsupandthenpullsmeup.WhenIst artt
opackhest opsmet ell
ingmethatsomeonewil
ldo
that
.Hetakesmyhandi nhisaswewal kbacktothelodge.I tseemsnatur
alforhi
mt ohol
dmy
hand.I
tfeel
sjustthesameformet obeheld.

Oncewearecheckedinthereceptui
nsi
walksustothi
sthatched-
roofsi
nglechal
et.Hel
eaves
usbythedoor
.Her eal
l
ydidn’tneedtoi
tsnotl
ikewehaveluggageoranythi
ng.Butweall
ow
hi
mt oshowcasehishospit
alit
yskil
l
s.

Sazi unlocksthedoorandopenst henhemakeswayt oall

owmei n.Thischaletisj
ustas
gloriousast herestoft
heplace.Thecent r
epi
eceofthi
sroom i
sthekingsizebedi nthemiddl
e.
Itlooksi nv
iti
ng.Theroom i
sdecor atedinwar
m andnat
uralcol
our
swi t
hdifferentAfr
icanpr
int
s
aswel l
toaddmor ecol
ourandchar acter
.

Onceinsi
dewef i
ndbamboochai rswi
thcushi
onsononesideoftheroom.Theyseem strong
andyetcomfort
able.Therei
salsoacoff
eetabl
einthecent
re.Thi
slooksl
ikeaTVar ea.Onone
si
deit’
sadressi
nguni tandnextt
oiti
sthedoorthatl
eadst
ot hebat
hroom andshower.A
sl
i
dingdooront
heot
hersi
deoft
her
oom whi
chopenedt
oapool
area.

Sazisuggest
sItakeashowerwhi
l
eheor
der
sfood.Iwasst
il
lnothungr
ybutIknewIwoul
dget
hungryevent
ual
l
y.SoIl
ethim.

OnethingIloveaboutluxuryaccommodat ionisthattheyt hi
nkofevery
thi
ng.Thei rt
oil
etri
es
comei nhandy.AftermyshowerIweart hef luff
ymor ninggownf orguests.Therearetwoof
them hi
sandher s.Igobackt otheroom tofindSazispr awledonthebed.Hel ooksatmef rom
mybar efeett
omyey es.Thelookisscorching.Hejumpsandadj usthi
sjeansashewal kspass
met othebathroom.Hel eavesmef anni
ngmy sel
f.

Whenhecomesbackhei sal
soweari
ngt herobe.Thethoughtofhim nakedunderneathmakes
myt ummyflut
ter.Iseeagli
mpseofhislegsandIsal i
vate.I
sthereanythi
ngimperfectabout
hisman?Heget sont hebedandsi
tsnextt ome.Iswallowjusttoeasemypat chedthroat
,the
thi
rsti
sreal
.Wear ebothleani
ngagai
nstt heheadboard.

“
Thef
oodwi
l
lgether
eint
wohour
stheysai
d.Theyhadt
ogett
hei
rexecut
ivechefoncal
l
.”

“
Icanwai
t.I
t’
snotl
i
kewear
egoi
ngany
wher
e.”Het
urnst
ofaceme.

“Ihopey
ouwon'
tsayy
ouar
est
uckwi
thme,
”hi
sey
esar
eful
lofl
aught
er.Il
ovet
hepl
ayf
ulsi
de
ofhim.

“Il
ovebei
ngst
uckwi
thy
ou.
”

“Youdo?”hi
svoicedr
opsandIbreakint
ogoosebumps.Heleanscl
osert
omeandcapturesmy
l
ipsinhi
s.Thekissi
swetandjui
cy.Thenhepul
lsbackl
eavi
ngusbothpanti
ng.Il
ooki
ntohi
s
eyesandIfeel
li
keI’
m dr
owning.

“Wehav
et ot
alkLi
namandla,”hesay
s.Hear
ingmynamef
rom hi
sli
pschar
gesmywhol
ebody
wi
thf
eel
ingsIcan'
tar
ti
culate.

“
Itsoundssoser
ious.
”Il
ookathi
m.
“
Iti
s.”Ther
eisahi
ntoff
eart
hatf
lashesi
nhi
sey
esbutonl
yforamoment
.Hel
ooksaway
.

“Hey ,
”hef acesme.Ipl acemyhandatt hebackofhi sneckandpul lhi
mt owardsme.Myl i
ps
tentati
velytouchhi s.Hei sst i
l
lunresponsive.Iki
sshi m.Iexplor ehislipswit
hmi newhi l
emy
handscar esshi shead.Icr awlontopofhi m andst raddlehisthighswhi l
ekissinghi
m.Hegasps
all
owi ngmyt ongueaccessi nsidehismout h.Hegr oansashi shandsgot omyass.Hei sin
chargenow.Thel owerpar tofmyr obeisopenal l
owi ngmycor etobei ndi
rectcontactwit
hhis
hardbul ge.Theonl ysav inggraceist hathisrobeisst i
ll
inplace.Wedev oureachotherwi t
hour
l
ips.Theonl ysoundIheari sofourl abouredbreathing.I’
mi nneed.I t’
salmostpainf
ul.Heopens
robeandcupsmybr east s.I’
m onf i
re.Myhi psareundul at
ingagai nsthisbulge.Hegroansand
pinchmyni pples.Iscream agai nsthismout h.

I’
mt r
yingtoremov ehisrobeof fhi
sshoul dersbutI ’
mf ai
li
ng.Theki ssbecomesmor e
demanding.Mor eurgentandwet ter.Icant ast
ehi sarousal.Itfir
esmybodyf rom wi thi
n.Hi s
handsarescorchingfir
eev erywherehet ouches.Myonehandgoesbet weenusatt akehi shard
memberi nmyhands.Hi sgroanisal mostapai nfulsoundagai nstmyl i
ps.Her eciprocatesthe
touchbytouchingmywetsl i
pperywel l.Ashi sfingerssepar atemyf oldstogett omypr otrudi
ng
numbIst r
okehi m.Hei sashar dasst eel.Icanf eelhisveinsal onghislonglengt h.Theheadi s
l
eakingwithpre-cum andIuset hatasal ubr i
cant.Histouchbecomel esscoordinatedi nmy
pussywhilesqueezingmyonebr east.Iwanthi m.Ican’ twai tanylonger.Screwt he
consequenceshehast oassuaget heinfer noinsideofme.Myst rokesbecomesbol der.

“
Fuck!
,heswear
sagai
nstmyl
i
ps.Icanbar
elyr
ecogni
sehi
svoi
ce.

“Iwantyou,”Iwhi sper
.Hefl
ipsmeov erandopenmyl egswhil
eheisnestledi nbetween.It
’s
fi
nall
yhappeni ng.Myinnerhoeisrej
oicing.Icanfeelhim har
d,hotandheav yagainstmythigh.
Hisleaki
ngpr e-cum apromiseoft
hepl easuresahead.Hei ssucki
ngonmybr eastsli
kehi
slife
dependsoni t.Whi l
ebusywitht
heother ,t
heonescr eamsf orat
tent
ion.I
’
mj ustclawingathis
backandt hrustingmyhipsupwardstoi ndi
catemybur ni
ngdesir
e.Thisi
st orture.

“
Sazi
.Pl
easebaby
.Ineedi
t.Ican’
twai
tanymor
e.”

“Igotyoubaby”hesay scomingbackt omyl i

ps.Hi
shandt ouchesmywetmoundasi ft
osee
howr eadyIam.ThenIf eelhi
mt akehishardmemberbringingitclosetomyheatedcore.I
openmyl egswider.Icanfeeltheti
ppoisedatmyentrance.Her ubsmyengor gednumbwi thi
ts
head.Webot hgroaninpleasure.Heispoisedagai
natmyent rance.Thenhisbodytenses.He
l
etsoutasser i
esofexpleti
ves.Hepulledbackwhil
eresti
nghisf oreheadagai
nstmine.
“
Wecan’t
,”hesays.Iwhi
neinpr
otestast
ear
spicklemyeyes.Hewoul
dn’
tbethi
scr
uelsur
ely
.
I
’
venev
erwant edanyoneasmuchasIwanthimrightnow.Mywhol
ebodyist
autwi
thneed.

“
NonoSazi
.Pl
easedon’
tst
op.
”I’
m notabov
ebeggi
ng.

“Idon'
thav
epr ot
ectionbaby
.”It
’smyt urntoswear.Ihadn’
teventhoughtaboutt
hat
.Ifeeltear
s
comingoutthecornersofmyey es.Yes.I’
mthathorny.Hewipesthem withhi
sthumb.Ilookup
tobemetbyhi sbloodshotredeyesthatarereducedintot
inysl
it
s.Ohy esheisashor
nyasI
am.

“Letmet akecareofy ou,

”hesay sasheki sseshiswaydown.Bef oreIcanevenprotestnotthat
Iwant edto,hehasmyl egswideopenandhi sheadi sburi
edinmypussy .Itl
egi
ttakeshimt wo
mi nut
esorlesst ohavemef al
l apar
tinhisar ms.Myor gasm catchesmebysur pri
se.Ittakes
theedgeof fbutIsti
llwantmor e.I
tdoesn’thelpwithmyhei ghtenedsenseswhenhel icksme
clean.Ipull
athisheadandbr inghim up.Hi seyesareglazedwi tharousal
.Hekissesme.I
tastemy sel
fandclawathi sshoulders.ScrewthecondomsIneedt hi
s.JustasI’
m aboutt ot
ell
him myphoner ings.Itr
ytoignoreitbutit’
spersist
ent.Webot hst opandhegetsoffme.

“
Answeri
t.I
tcoul
dbethekids.”Mystar
s!Ihav
ekids.Ij
umpandgettoit
.WhenIanswert
her
e
i
scry
ingontheot
hersi
de.Ididn’
tevencheckwhoitwaswhenIdo,
it’
sLala.

“Lal
a.What’
sgoi
ngon?
”Il
ookatSaz
iwhoi
sami
xtur
eofconcer
nedandar
ousednextt
ome.
Shesnif
fs.

“
Lal
a!Tal
ktome.Youar
escar
ingme.
”

“
Ineedy
ourhel
p.”Shesay
sint
hesmal
l
estofv
oices.

“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”

“
Atmyhouse.
”
“I
’
m onmyway .”Ihangup.AlreadySazi
isonhisfeettothebat
hroom.Comesbackwithmy
cl
othesandt hr
owst hent ome.Hegoesbacktothebat hr
oom.I’
m assumi
ngt oal
sogetdress.
Mybodyi ssoconf used.Ami xt
ureofemoti
onswithinminut
es.Secondsl
aterSazi
walksback
i
nalreadydressed.I’
m alsodone.

“
What
’sgoi
ngonwi
thher
?”heasks.

“
I’
m notsur
e.Shei
saski
ngf
ormyhel
p.”Henodshi
shead.

“
Arey
our
eady
?”Inodmyhead.

“Let
sgo.
”Wef i
rstgototherecept
iontocancel
thef
oodor
derandset
tl
eourbi
l
l.Theyst
il
l
char
geusforev
erythi
ng.Thenwear eonourway.

Chapt
er11

“
I'
mjeal
ousoft
heni
ght
s

ThatIdon'
tspendwi
thy
ou

I
'
m wonder
ingwhoy
oul
aynextt
o

Oh,
I'
mjeal
ousoft
heni
ght
s

I
'
mjeal
ousoft
hel
ove

Lov
ethatwasi
nher
e

Gonef
orsomeoneel
set
oshar
e

Oh,
I'
mjeal
ousoft
hel
ove”
-Labr
int
h

“
Whatdoy
out
hinki
sgoi
ngwi
thLazol
a?”heasks.

“I
’
m notsure.All
IknowisthatLalai
snotanemotionalper
son.Sowhateverisgoingonmustbe
hugeforhertobreakdownli
kethat,
”Ir
espond.HeisspeedingandIdon’
tmi nd.Ther
eisno
tr
aff
ic.Wegetbackt oJo’
burgi
nlessamountofti
met hanittookustogettoMagal i
es.Aswe
appr
oachLala’shouseIcal
lher.
“
Hel
l
o,”shesof
tl
yanswer
s.

“
Wear
ebyy
ourhouse.Wher
ear
eyou?
”

“
Whoi
swe?
”Idet
ectahi
ntofannoy
ancei
nhert
one.

“
Sazi
.”

“
Whywoul
dyoubr
inghi
m?”

“Iwaswithhim whenyoucall
edLal
a.Iwaswor r
iedaboutyouanddi
dn’
twantt
owastepr
eci
ous
ti
mebygoi nghomef i
rst
.”I
’
m exasper
ated.Shei
squietforamomentandnowwearepar
kedby
herhouse.

“
It
sfi
ne.Ar
eyouher
eyet
?”

“
Wear
eout
side.
”

“
Pleasecomei
n,al
one.
”Shehangsup.

“
Shesay
sImustcomeal
one.
”Het
hinksabouti
tforaf
ewseconds.

“
Ify
oudon’
tcal
lmei
ntenmi
nut
es,
I’
m comi
ngi
n.”

“
Whatwoul
dLal
adot
ome?
”

“
Justl
etmeknowi
fyouar
eokaywheny
ougeti
nsi
de.I
’
llwai
ther
e.”
Hei
sweir
dthisone.Igetoutoft
hecar.Thegat
eopensandIwalkin.Lal
aiswait
ingformeby
t
hepor
ch.Shegetsbackinthehouseoncesheseesmeapproach.If
oll
owherinsidethehouse.

“
Wher
eisev
ery
oneel
se?
”thehousei
stooqui
et.

“
Gone.
”Shei
sst
il
lfaci
ngt
heot
herwayandl
ooki
ngdown.

“
Lal
a.What
’sgoi
ngon.
”

“
Hei
scheat
ingonme.
”Herv
oicebr
eaks.

“
Bri
an!
”I’
m shook.Hei
sper
fect
.It
’snotpossi
ble.

“WhenIconfront
edhim hedidthistome!”Sheturnsaroundtorevealherbat
ter
edface.Igasp,
handscover
ingmymout h.Herleftey
eisbadlybrui
sed,almostblackandswoll
enshut.Her
upperl
ipt
orn.Icanseehandmar ksaroundherneck.Nowt hatInoti
ceherri
ghtar
mi shanging
awkwardl
y

“
WhatthefuckLal
a!”Tearsst
artst
reamingdownherface.Imovecl
osert
oher
.“Wehav
eto
t
akeyoutothehospit
al.
”Sheshakesherheadwil
dlyi
nrefusal
.

“Heisadoct
or,r
emember
?Het
reat
edmeandgav
emepai
ntabl
ets.Not
hingi
sbr
oken.
”She
sit
sonthecouch.

“
Wehav
etocal
lthepol
i
ceLal
a.Youhav
etor
epor
thi
m.”

“
No,
nopol
i
cei
nvol
vement
.He’
l
ltakemysonaway
.”

“
Howcanhet
akey
oursonawaywhenhei
sinj
ail
?Lal
a!Youcan’
tlethi
m getawaywi
tht
his.
”

“
Ijustneedapl
acet
ost
ayf
oraf
ewday
sLonaunt
ilhecal
msdown.
”I’
m conf
usedasf
uckr
ight
now.Nj
ani
!

“
Youst
il
lconsi
dercomi
ngback?
”

“
Youdon’
tunder
standLona.CanIcomecr
ashaty
ourpl
aceornot
?”

“
Jasure.
”Iseri
ousl
ydon'tunder
standwhywedon'tgetBr
ian’
sassar
rest
ed.Sheget
supand
t
ri
estopickupheral
readypackedbackbutf
li
nchesinpai
n.“Letmet
akethat.
”

Wewalktothecarandshepul
lst
hehoodieoverherhead.Oncewegetinthecarshegr
eets
Sazi
.Hesteal
saquickgl
anceatme.Icanseethequesti
onsinhi
seyes.Ishrugmyshoul
der.

“
Wher
eto?
”heasks.

“
Myhouse.
”

Weareal
lsil
enti
nthecarunti
lwegettomyhouse.Sazi
takest
hebagoutandhel
puscar
ryi
t
t
othehouse.OncedoneheleavesandIf
oll
owhi
m out.

“Whathappened?
”

“
It
’sherhusband.
”

“Whyi
ssheher
eandnotatt
hepol
i
cest
ati
on?
”

“
Sher
efuses.I
’
m al
sonotcl
earonwhat
’sgoi
ngon.

“Letmeknowwheny
ouneedme.Ihav
etogo.
”

“Okay
.”Hepul
l
smei
nhi
sar
msandhol
dsmet
ight
.
“Goodnight
.”Heplantsasoftki
ssonmyf oreheadt
henl
oosenshi
shold.“
goinandlockup.
”I
tur
naroundleavi
nghi m st
andi
ngbyhiscar.Il
ockupandgobacktoLalai
nthelounge.
Every
oneelseisasleepandI’
m gl
adforthat.

“
Ifeel
sohumi
l
iat
ed,
”shesay
s.

“
Sazi
won’
tsayany
thi
ng.
”

“Howdoy ouknow?Heisacheaterjustli
ketherestofthem”Icr
inge“andyouareri
ghtthere
wit
hhi m asanaccessory
!I’
m sor
ryI’
mj udgementalbutwhatyouaredoingsucksLona!Where
i
sy ourloyal
tyforwomen?Thishappenedtoy ouandyoudidn’
tli
keit.Nowyouareapar t
ici
pant
!”
sheisrightIknowthi
s.Ij
ustdon'
twantt ohearit
.

“Youareal
socheat
ingt
hough.
”LikeI
’
m notgoingtosi
ther
eandl
i
stent
oherpr
eachaboutt
he
sanct
it
yofmarri
agewhensheisnobett
er.I
sazel
asenj
anjal
o.

“Youareri
ghtI
’
m sor
ry.
”Shebreaksdownandcri
esagai
n.Igosi
tnextt
oherandwr
apmyar
m
aroundher
.Shefl
i
nches.Il
oosenmygriponher
.

“
I’
m sor
ryt
oo.Youar
eri
ght
.It
hinky
ouatl
eastneedt
ogot
othehospi
tal
.
”

“
Thehospi
tal
wil
lwantt
oinv
olv
ethepol
i
ceLona.
”

“
Noti
fyoudon’
twantt
hem t
o.Ist
il
ldon’
tunder
standwhyy
ouar
elet
ti
nghi
m getawaywi
tht
his.
”

“
He’
l
ltakeMat
tawayf
rom me,
”shei
sdi
str
aughtr
ightnow.

“Igett
heimpressi
onthatther
eismoreLala.Whati
sit
?I’
m her
efory
ou.
”Shesni
ff
s.Shei
stoo
quietI
’
m eventhi
nkingshewon'tr
espond.

“IcaughtBr
ianwi
thanur
sehewor
kswi
thhav
ingsexadaybef
oreourweddi
ng.Your
emember
Ihadleftt
hebachel
oret
tepartyear
lybecauseIwasfeel
i
ngsi
ck.If
oundt
hem scr
ewi
ngeach
otherinourr
oom atthelodge.
”I’
m shook.Andi
namagama.

“Anyway.Heki ckedherout.Decl
aredhisloveandshowedr emorse.Iwashur tbutwasal so
ashamed.SoIl ett
heweddingcontinue.Hewasr emorsefulf
orawhileafterourweddi ng.Unti
lI
noti
cedthattheoncal l
swer ebecomingf r
equent.Ist
art
edgetti
ngparanoid.Iwoul dcallt
he
hospit
alatnightandaskf orhi
m butIwoul dbetoldhewasn'tonduty.OnenightIf ol
lowedhi m
unti
lhewenti ntosomet ownhousecompl exinEastRand.Ididmoreinvesti
gation.Thenur seI
caughthim withstaysi
nEastRand. ”Shebreaksdownf oramoment .Itr
yandconsol eher .

“
Lal
a.Whydi
dn’
tyousayany
thi
ng?
”

“Saywhat
?ThatIwasanai vefool?Mymar r
iagewasasham fr
om thebeginni
ng?Itget
swor
se.
Heisnothidi
ngitanymoreLona.Ioncecaughtthem i
nmyhousewhenIcamebackhome
earl
y.Hehasn’
ttouchedmeinov erayear
.Allhedoesisbuymest uf
f.Lal
a.Theygoon
holi
dayst
ogetherorbookhotel
sandspendsal lhi
sday-of
fswi
thher.
”

“Lal
a.”WhatcanIsay
.Igetabr
iefpi
ctur
eoft
heanony
mousMr
sKhumal
oandapangofgui
l
t
cutsthr
oughme.

“SoAt hicamei ntothepi ctur e.Hemademef eelali

vef orthosefewmoment s.Isleptwi t
hhim
ofcour se.Hemademef eel wanted.LikeIwassexyasopposedt oBrian.Whomademel ikeI
wasapar iah.Worthless.WhenIwaswi t
hAt hiIforgotaboutmymi seryathome.Doy ouknow
whatmadet hi
ngswor se? ”Ishakemyhead.Coul di tgetanywor se?“EverytimeIconf ronted
him abouthi scheati
nghebeatmeup.Yes.Br i
anhasbeenbeat i
ngmef oral mostay ear.He
wassmar taboutitonpr ev iousoccasions.Henev ertouchedt hefaceuntiltoday .Ihavehad
enough.If oundoutt hatt hewomani spr egnantwi t
hhi sbabysoIt ol
dhi m Ihadenough.How
doIdeal wit
hthat?That ’
showIendedupl i
kethis.Afterbeatingmehepul ledouthi sphoneand
showedmeaser iesofv ideo' s.MeandAt hifuckingint hecar,ki
ssi
ngout sideacl uband
snorti
ngcokei nacl ub'sbat hroom onetime.”

“
Lal
adr
ugs!
”

“I
twasonlythatonet ime.At
hicouldn’
tgetmeoutofaf unkymoodandIbeggedhi mf oral i
ne.
Idi
dn’
tevenlikeit.That’
snotanissue.Theissuei
sthathehasal lt
hatevi
denceandi fIleave
hi
m hefi
ghtsf orcustodyofmyson.Ican’tlosemysonLona. ”Shefal
lsonmylapandbr eaks
i
ntohear
tbreakingsobs.Mymi ndi ssti
ll
try
ingtowrapit
selfaroundherrev
elat
ions.Ilegitnever
sawthi
scomingandforonceinmyl
ifeI
’m outofwor
ds.Ij
ustbr
ushherbackandlethercr
y.
Shecri
esunt
ilshei
sonlyl
eftwit
hhi
ccups.Igi
vehert
wopaintabl
etsandtakehert
otheguest
room.

It
’sal
mostmidni
ghtwhenIgotobed.WhenIcheckmyphoneIhaveamessagefr
om Monde
sayi
nggoodni
ght
.Irecei
vedi
ttwohoursago.I
t’
slat
eandIknowshehasabusydayaheadsoI
l
etherbe.

Thefoll
owingmor ningshecallsfi
rstt
hingandwechatf oralmostanhour.Shewant smeto
comejoinherbutIcan’ tl
eaveLalainherconditi
on.Itel
lherasmuch.Af t
ermycal lIgocheck
onthekidsandf indthem inthei
rplayroom.ThenIcheckonLal a.Sheissti
ll
sleepingt
he
swell
i
ngseemst ohav egonedownbutt heeyesti
lll
ooksgr een.OhLala.Howdowegety ou
outofthi
ssituat
ion?Iwonderi fsheisreadytoleaveBri
an.Ihopeshei sbecauseifshedoesn’
t,
she’
ll
leaveinabodybagandIj ustcan’
tl ett
hathappen.

Whil
ebusymaki
ngbreakf
astmyphoner
ings.I
t’
sSazi
.Icont
empl
atenotanswer
ingbut
knowi
nghim,
hewil
lj
ustshowupatmydoor.SoIanswer.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“
Linamandl
a.”Iguesshechosest
obedi
ff
erent
.“Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
mfi
ne.Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m good.Howi
sLal
a?”

“
Shei
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ng.
”

“Li
sten.Apparent
lyshetol
dAthiandnowhei
sfr
eaki
ngoutandwant
stocomet
her
e.I
’
m not
sureifyouareokaywiththat
.”

“
I’
m notr
eall
ysur
ebuti
fLal
awant
shi
m Ican’
tst
ophi
m.”I
’
m hopi
ngt
hatheconv
inceshert
ogo
t
othepoli
ce.
“
Sharp.Wewi l
lbet herei
n30.”Hehangsup.Isuddenl
yworryaboutwheret
heywillsi
t.Ihav
eno
f
urni
tureexceptforthebinbags.Wellthey
’l
lhav
etomakedo.Thatr emi
ndsmet hatIhaveto
move.Ihadplannedt obemov i
ngt hi
sweekbutwit
hever
ythinghappeni
ng,
it’
simpossibl
e.I
makeenoughbr eakfastf
oreveryone.

AssoonasIfi
nishLal
acomesintheki
tchenl
ooki
ngwor
sef
orwear
.Br
iandi
danumberonher
.
Icanseet
hateveryst
epshet
akesinaneffor
t.

“
Mor
ning.
”Herv
oicei
shoar
se.

“
Mor
ningbabe.I
’
m maki
ngbr
eakf
ast
.Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”

“
Inpai
n.”

“
Athi
isonhi
sway
.”Iseeahi
ntofpani
cinherey
es.

“
Hecan’
tseehi
mli
ket
his.Idi
dn’
twanthi
mtocome.
”

“
Wel
lhei
sonhi
sway
.”

“Letmegofreshenup.
”Shet
urnsar
oundandl
eav
e.Justt
hent
heki
dscomebust
li
ngi
ntot
he
kit
chenf
oll
owedbyaunt y
.

“
Ist
hef
oodr
eady
?”asksKhot
hat
so.

“
Inami
nut
e.Gowashy
ourhands.
”

Thear
ebot
hfi
ght
ingi
nthesi
nkt
obet
hef
ir
stt
owash.

“
Aunt
y.Myf
ri
endi
sher
eforaf
ewday
s.Shemi
ghtneedal
i
ttl
eext
rahel
p.”
“
Ijustsawhernow,
”sher
esponds.“
Any
thi
ngIcanhel
pyouwi
th?
”

“NoI’
m al
mostdone.Youcanj
usthel
pwi
tht
heki
dsespeci
all
yNt
hant
isi
,j
ustmakessur
eshe
eat
s.”

“
Shedoesn’
tli
ket
obef
edt
hisone.
”

“
Shet
hinksshei
sabi
ggi
rl
.It
’sast
ruggl
eaunt
y.”

Ifi
nishcookinganddishupforthekidsandauntywhilewaiti
ngfortheguest
stoarri
ve.ThenI
remembert hatIhaveagardentabl
ewi thchai
rsbythepool.Iwonderwhatcondi
ti
onthepooli
s
i
n.Inourstruggleswehaven’tpai
dattenti
ontothegarden.

Igooutsi
detocheckandasIexpected.I
t’
samess.Thegrassisov
ergrown.Thepool i
son
anotherl
evel
offil
thy
.Noonecansithere.Imakeamentalnot
etocal
lthegar
dener.Ican’
tput
thi
shouseont hemarketl
i
ket
his.EvenIwouldn’
tbuti
t.

Iaskauntytohel
pmebr i
ngt
heheav ytabl
eandchairsi
nside.May beIshoul
dhavewait
edfor
thement ohel
p.AssoonasIfi
nishcl
eaningthem t
hedoorbellr
ings.Iopenfort
hem.Lal
ais
back.Seemsli
keshetookashower.Shesti
ll
looksbatt
ered.

“Theyarehere.
”Sheisnervous.Igoopenthedoorandit’
smyt ur
ntobenervous.At
hii
s
wear i
ngti
ghtfi
tt
ingj
eansthatemphasi
seshisbracketf
ordays.Hehasasoccerbodthi
sone.I
f
Ididn’
thavethemanbehindhimtodroolov
erI’
dbegoi nggagaoverhi
m.

“
HeyLona,
”At
hihugsmeasawayofgr
eet
ing.

“HiAt
hi.Comeoni n.
”Ist
epasi
detolethimi
n.Myeyesareonthesexywetdream behi
ndhim
weari
ngfadedjeansandasi
mplet-
shirt
.HehasshadesonsoIcan'
treal
lyseehiseyes.Hei
s
alway
sasi ghtf
orsoreey
esforme.Mybodytemperatur
eper
ksup.

“
Linamandl
a,
”hebr
eaksi
ntoagr
in.Myhear
tski
psabeat
.Iam scr
ewed.
“
HiSazi
.”

“
Youl
ookgood.
”IknowIdonot
.Leggi
ngsandat
-shi
rtar
enot
hingt
owr
it
ehomeabout
.

“Thankyou.Sodoy ou.”Ireall
ymeant han.Hestil
lstandi
ngjustoutsi
dethedoor.OnceIreal
ise
Istepasidetolethi
mi n.Hecomesandst andsinfrontofme.Hisclosenessandhisscent
awakensal l
senses.Icanf eelheatcour
singthr
oughmybody .Heisstari
ngdownonmewi th
hisshadeson.Ilookathisl i
psandmemor i
esoflastnightcomefloodi
ngin.Hedipshishead
andplantsakissonmycheekt hengoespass.Icanf i
nall
ybreat
he.

“
Ipr
epar
edbr
eakf
ast
.Woul
dyouguy
sli
ket
ojoi
nus?
”Iask.At
hii
sfussi
ngov
erLal
a.

“
Thanky
ou.I
'
dlov
ethat
,”Sazi
say
s.Hehast
akenhi
sshadesof
f.“
wher
ear
etheki
ds?
”

“
Int
hei
rroom wi
thaunt
y.”

“
Ihopet
oseet
hem bef
oreIl
eav
e.CanIhel
pwi
thany
thi
ng?
”

“
Sur
e.Foll
owme. ”Hef
oll
owsmet otheki
tchen.Themomentwegeti
nther
ehehasmeagai
nst
t
hefr
idgekissi
ngmesensel
ess.Byt
hetimehel et
sgoI
’m st
ruggl
i
ngt
obreat
he.

“
Iwant
edt
odot
hatt
hemomentIsawy
ou,
”hesay
sinhi
sraspyv
oice.

“
Wecan’
tkeepdoi
ngt
hisSazi
,
”myt
wit
chi
ngv
agi
nai
sbet
ray
ingt
hosewor
ds.

“
WhatcanIhel
pyouwi
th?
”hechosest
oignor
emyst
atement
.Il
ethi
m.Hehel
psset
ti
ngupand
t
hendi
shi
ngup.

Weallsi
taroundt
hetabl
eandeat
.It
’sabi
tawkwardbecauseAt
hit
hemostt
alkat
iveone
amongstusseemstobebatt
li
ngwit
hhisemot
ions.
“
I’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lhi
m,”hef
inal
l
ydecl
ares.

“
Athi
!”Sazi
war
ns.

“
Noman,
lookather
!Whatki
ndofacowar
ddoest
his?
”

“
Athi
pleasel
eti
tgo,
”Lal
asay
s.Heget
supandwal
ksout
side.Lal
afol
l
owshi
m.

“
Hei
snott
aki
ngi
twel
l
,”Isay
.

“
Ja.Hei
snot
.At
hii
sav
eryemot
ional
bei
ng,
”hesay
s.

“Youseem t
obeagroupofcheaters.
”Itj
ustcomesoutandIregreti
tthemomenti
tdoes.He
putshi
scutl
erydownandwipeshismouth.Ithi
nkIj
ustrui
nedbreakfast
.

“
Youdon’
tseem t
obeanydi
fferent.
”Ohwow.IguessIaskedf
ort
hat
.“Thatwascr
assofme.
I
’
m sor
ry.
”Heimmedi
atel
yapologises.

“
I’
m sor
ryt
oo.I
t’
sjustt
hatI
’
m bat
tl
ingwi
thmyconsci
enceandAt
hibei
ngengaged.
..
”

“
Hebr
oket
heengagementof
fimmedi
atel
yaf
terhi
spar
ty,
”hecut
smeof
f.

“
Oh.
”

“Ja.Li
stenIknowIhavepl
acedyouinanawkwardsit
uat
ion.Idon'
tknowwhattosay.I
t’
sjust
thatIcan’
tstayawayfr
om y
ou.I’
vetri
ed.”Wear
esi
lentf
oramoment .Iwantt
otell
him we
shouldendthingsbutt
hewordsarestucki
nmythr
oat.

Ev
ent
ual
l
ythet
wocomebackandAt
hii
scal
mer
.Wecl
eart
het
abl
eanddot
hedi
shes.Theki
ds
comedownandjoi
nuswi t
hthei
rendl
essquest
ionsf
oruncl
eSazi
.Theyengagehi
mint
hei
r
ownconv
ersat
ionunt
ili
t’
sti
metoleav
e.

OnSundayaf t
ernoonI ’
m wai t
ingforMondet ocomeback.Wehav eplansfordinner.Imustsay
I’
ml ooki
ngforwardtoi t
.Ihav ereall
ymi ssedher .OnonehandIhav ebeenchat t
ingwi t
hSazi
non-stopsi
ncey est
erday.Hef ir
stcomment edaboutmyI nstagram postwi ththekids.Iaccused
him ofstal
ki
ngme.Thent hatconv er
sationledtoanot herteasing.Hi sInst
agram account
thoughisbori
nghenev erpostsandt hepeopl ehef ol
l
owsar eaf ewbusi nesspeopl e.Isti
l
l
refusetoGooglehim.Idon’ twanttoseet hewi f
e.Ichooset obeobl ivi
oustoherpr esenceandI
knowonceIseeapi ctureshewi l
lbear eali
ty.StupidIknow.Hi st ext
sar ewitt
y .Hekeptmehal f
amusedandhal farousedt heentir
etime.

I’minmyr oom t r
yingondi fferentoutfit
s.Ineedtolooksexywi t houtbei ngobv ious.It
’shar dto
i
mpr essMondebecauseIt hi nksheexudessexi nesswi thoutevent r
ying.JustasIf ini
sh
decidi
ngonanout fitthereiscommot ioncomi ngfr
om downst airs.Igocheckt ofindBrianin
themi ddl
eofmyl i
vingr oom.Hei sonhi skneesinfrontofLal a.I'm noti mpr essed.Iwat chas
hebegswi thallsortsofpr omi ses.He’ll
change,he’l
lnev erhitheragai n, he’l
lattendchur ch.He
i
spossessed, it
’sdemonst hatar emaki nghimt hi
sper son.Oh, he’ l
lattendt herapy.Hegoes
fur
therbyclaimingt obeav icti
m.Hewat chedhisfatherbeathi smot her.Heswor enev ertolay
ahandonawomanagai n.Hei ssick.Heneedshel p.Thel istisendl ess.If eell
ikev omiti
ng.Lala
i
ssuckedi n.Sheisal readyhol dinghisheadt ohertummycomf orti
nghi m.Hegott oher.There
i
snot hingIcansayt ochangehermi nd.Icanseei talready.Shei sgoingbackt ohi m.

Event
ual
l
yheiscal
m andtheyar
ekissi
ng,whi
speri
ngsweetnot
hingst
oeachot
her
.Whent
hey
l
etgoofeachot
her
,sheturnsar
oundtofaceme.Shecan’
tmeetmyeyes.

“
Weneedt
otal
k.”It
urnar
oundandgot
omyr
oom.Shef
oll
owsme.

“
Don’
tsayi
tLona,
”shesay
sthemomentwegeti
n.“
Hei
smyhusband.Wegoi
ngt
owor
kitout
.”

“
Hewi
l
lki
l
lyouLal
a!”I
’
m scar
edf
orher
.

“
Thi
sImymar
ri
age.Iatl
easthav
etowor
kitout
.”Doessher
eal
l
ybel
i
evewhatshei
ssay
ing?

“
Howar
eyougoi
ngt
owor
koutababy
?”Shegi
vesmeamur
der
ousl
ook.
“
See.That
’swhyIdon’
tli
ket
ell
i
ngpeopl
emybusi
ness.Youcoul
dn’
twai
ttot
hrowt
hati
nmy
f
ace!
”shescreams.

“
Whyam It
hebadguy
?”

“IhavetogoLona.Ihavemissedmybaby.Thankyouforyourhospi
tal
i
ty.
”Sheleavesme
standi
ngther
ebaffl
ed.Ifol
l
owherandwat chassheleaveswit
hherhusband.Heistheone
cari
ngherbagandact i
ngli
kegent
lemen.Ifeel
def
eated.

Twohoursl
atertheki
dsarereadyforbedandI’mreadyformylatedi
nner
.Monde’
sfl
ightwas
del
ayedsoshereschedul
ed.I
’m sograt
eful
foraunt
yIfeell
ikeIhavet
imetodothet
hingsI
wanttodo.

Shecall
smet ot
ellmesheisout
sidemyhouse.Igetmybagandgo.Ther eisa7ser i
esparked
outsi
de.ThemomentIwal koutt
hegat eshecomesoutf
rom thebackseat.Ski
nnyjeans,
vest
andanav ybluebl
azer.Shehast
hesleevesrol
l
edtoherelbowswithablackheel.Herhai
rin
herusualdo.Shelookssexyasf
uck.

IwalktowardsherandwhenIr
eachhersheopensherar
msf
orme.Thef
ami
l
iarscent
.It
’s
i
ntoxicat
ing.

“
Heybabe,
”shewhi
sper
sagai
nstmyneck.

“
Hi,
”I’
m shyal
lofasudden.

“
I’
vemi
ssedy
ou.I
’
m sor
ryI
’
mlat
e.”

“
It
’sokay
.”Iam amess.

Wegoinsi
dethecarandsheintr
oducesmetothedri
verasherf
ri
end.ThewayI’
m sonervousI
missev
enhisname.I’
m ant
ici
pati
ngakissbuti
tdoesn’
tcome.Shetakesmyhandinher
s
t
hough.
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngme?
”Iwhi
sper
.If
eel
li
ket
hedr
iveri
sint
rudi
ng.

“
SanDeck,
”shewhi
sper
sback.

“
Ooh.Excel
l
entchoi
ce.Whyt
hedr
iver
?”

“
Hecamet
ofet
chmef
rom t
heai
rpor
t.
”Makessense.

Weengagei
nsmal
lchatunt
ilwegett
other
est
aur
ant
.Il
ovet
hepl
ace.Il
ovei
tmor
edur
ingt
he
day
.

Wegett oourt
ablewhichshehadreser
ved.Thewaitresstakesourorder
sandleaves.Weare
seat
edinacosycor nerwhi
chmakesusf eel
li
keit’
sjustthetwoofus.Shehasmov edherchai
r
ri
ghtnexttomine.Assheretel
l
smeabouthertripIcan’thel
pbutlookatherl
ips.Ir
emember
howsofttheyareespeci
all
ywhenshewasbur i
edbetweenmyt hi
ghs.Mypussytwitches.

“
Youdi
dn’
thearawor
dIsai
d,
”shei
scl
oser
.Ofcour
seIdi
dn'
t.

“
Idi
dn’
tgetmyki
ss.
”

“Letmerecti
fythat.
”SheleanscloserandImeetherhal f
way.I
t’
ssultr
yandsoft.Shepull
smy
neckanddeepenst heki
ss.Thereisshar pintensefeel
i
ngdeepi nmytummyi tpoolsdowninto
mywomb.Someonecl earsthei
rthroat.Wel etgoofeachother.Ist
il
lwantmore.May bewe
shouldbookaroom hereatthehot el
,myi nnerhoecontemplat
es.Sheplacesourdrinksont
he
tabl
eandleaves.Sheisal
sof l
ustered.Poorwai tr
ess.I
fsheknewwhatMonde’ skissesdidt
o
mybodyshewoul dbebeggingforhert ur
n.

Wechataboutev eryt
hingandany t
hi ng.Thewayshel ooksatmewhenIspeak.Shemakesme
feelli
keI’mt heonlyper soni
nther oom.Thenwhenshet alks.Shedrawsmei n.Iloveherbig
eyeswhi chreflectallt
heemot i
onsshegoest hrough.Ievenl oveherti
ghtbun.Thewayshe
pull
satherhai rmakesheral mostl ookl i
keageishawi t
houtt hemakeup.Ist i
ll
thinkofherasa
domi natr
ix.Thewayshecar r
iesher self
.It
’scontr
oll
ed,calculatedbutsexy.Shet akescharge
andseemsf ear l
ess.Iwonderwhati twoul dbeli
ketosubmi ttoher.Beathermer cyformy
pleasure.Woul dsheletmebegf orreleaseorwouldshecont inueunti
lIcouldn’
ttakei tany
more.
“
Youar
ezoni
ngoutonmeagai
n.Thatl
ooki
nyourey
esi
snothel
pingt
hesi
tuat
ion,
”shesay
s.

“Whatdoesmyl
ookdot
oyou?
”Il
i
ckmysuddenl
ydr
yli
ps.Shef
oll
owst
hemov
ement
.I’
min
heat
.

“I
tmakesmewanttodounspeakabl
ethingstoy
ourbody.”Weareint
err
uptedbythewai
tr
ess
bri
ngi
ngourf
ood.Whensheisgonewest ar
teat
ing.Iam st
arv
ingsoIdon’
twast
et i
me.
Howevermybodyi
shummingwi t
harousal.

“
Therei
ssomethingIhavetotel
lyou,
”Isayhal
fwayt
hroughourmeal
.Shest
opseat
ingand
l
ooksatme.Ican’
treadherfaceri
ghtnow.

“I
tsoundsser
ious,
”shesay
s.Shoul
dIt
ell
hert
hough?If
eel
li
keIneedt
o.Tr
anspar
encyi
skey
herebef
oreanyoneel
segetshur
t.

“
I’
vebeenseei
ngsomeone,
”Ist
atef
lat
ly.Ahi
tofhur
tfl
ashesi
nherey
esbutshequi
ckl
ymasks
i
t.

“Ohwow.Iwasn'texpect
ingt
hat
.”Sheput
shercut
ler
ydownandl
eansbacki
nherchai
r.Iguess
Ijustr
uineddi
nner
.

(
Iapol
ogi
sef
ort
heer
ror
s.Ihav
eanunexpect
edv
isi
tor
.)

Chapt
er12

“Uy
andi
caphuki
sa

EkseI
'
m sor
ry

Zol
'ubukuphi
izol
obengi
ser
hont
shi
ni

Nguban'
uNoxol
o

She'
sjustaf
ri
endangi
nabel
l
as,
angi
na

addr
ess”
-Zol
a
“
It
’snotwhaty
out
hink,
”Iqui
ckl
yadd.

“
I’
m notsur
eifmyear
sar
efai
l
ingmebutI

t
houghtIj
usthear
dyousayy
ouar
eseei
ng

someone.
”Shei
sbackt
oherser
iousf
ace.

“
Seei
ngmi
ghtbet
oopr
esumpt
uous.Tobe

honestI
’
m notsur
ehowt
ocal
li
t.Wear
ejust

v
ibi
ng.
”Herey
eswi
den.

“
Ithoughty
ouwer
esi
ngl
e,
”shesay
s.

“
Iam.WhatI
’
mtr
yingt
osayi
sthatt
her
eis

someoneel
sewhoi
sint
erest
edi
nmet
he

samewayy
ouar
e.Il
i
kehi
m butwecan’
t

hav
eeachot
herorpur
suei
tbecausehei
s

mar
ri
ed.Ij
ustwant
edt
olety
ouknowupf
ront

sot
hatt
her
ear
en’
tanycompl
i
cat
ionsor

mi
sunder
standi
ngi
nthef
utur
e.”

“
I’
m notsur
eIf
oll
ow.Hei
smar
ri
edandy
ou

don’
tseeaf
utur
ewi
thhi
m.Whyar
eyou

t
ell
i
ngmet
hen?
”

“
Sot
haty
ouknowwher
eI’
m at
.I’
m notr
eady

f
oracommi
tmentf
rom y
ouorf
rom hi
mfor

t
hatmat
ter
.Att
hispoi
nti
nmyl
i
feIj
ustwant

t
ohav
efun.Idon’
twantt
oleady
ouonwi
th

t
hought
soft
hef
utur
eorexcl
usi
vi
ty.
”

“
Asi
nfor
ever
?”

“
Justf
ornow.I
’
lll
ety
ouknowwhent
hings

change.Wi
tht
hatsai
dIr
equi
ret
hesamel
evel

ofhonest
yfr
om y
ouaswel
l
.Ar
eweont
he

samepage?
”

“
Wit
hmeImi
ghtbeaf
ewst
epsaheadofy
ou
wi
thr
egar
dst
ohowIf
eel
abouty
oubutIam

pat
ient
.I’
l
lgoaccor
dingt
oyourpace.CanI

askt
hough?
”

“
Sur
e,any
thi
ng.
”

“
Whati
fthi
sguywasn'
tmar
ri
ed,
woul
dyou

st
il
lbewi
thme?
”

“
Idon’
tknow.WhatIknowi
sthatr
ightnowI

wantt
obewi
thy
ou.
”Shet
akesmyhandi
n

her
s.

“
That
'sgoodenoughf
orme.
”

“
Andy
ou?Ar
eyousi
ngl
e?”Shehesi
tat
esf
ora

spl
i
tsecond.

“
YesIam.
”

“
That
'sgoodenoughf
orme.Sowecanhav
e

f
unt
hen.
”Shesmi
l
es.Il
eancl
oserandgi
ve

herapeckont
hel
i
ps.JustasIpul
lawayshe

hol
dsmecl
oseranddeepenst
heki
ss.Il
ove

ki
ssi
ngher
.Theear
li
erf
ir
eisr
eki
ndl
ed.

“
Iwantt
obewi
thy
out
oni
ght
.Canwebooka

r
oom att
hishot
el?
”shemur
mur
sagai
nstmy

l
i
ps.

Ihadhopedt
oseeherpl
acebuti
t’
ski
ndof

l
atet
obedr
ivi
ngbackandf
ort
h.

“
Iwoul
dlov
ethat
.Letmej
ustl
etaunt
yknow

t
hatI
’
m notcomi
ngback.
”

“
I’
ll
rel
easet
hedr
iveraswel
l
.”Webot
hcal
l

t
hepeopl
eweneedt
o.Af
ter
war
dsweset
tl
e

ourbi
l
landgot
other
ecept
iont
obooka

r
oom.Wear
esi
l
entaswet
akeanel
evat
orup
whi
chi
ncr
easest
het
ensi
oncoi
l
edi
nmy

t
ummy
.

Oncei
nther
oom shehasmeagai
nstt
hewal
l

andki
ssi
ngmesensel
ess.Ihav
enochoi
ce

butt
oret
urnt
hef
ier
yki
ss.Shei
sincont
rol

r
ightnowandIl
ovei
t.Ir
evel
ini
t.Shet
akes

of
fmycl
othesonebyonewhi
l
eki
ssi
ngme

unt
ilI
’
mlef
tnakedwi
thonl
ymyheel
son.

“
Fuckbaby
,youl
ookf
ucki
nghot
!”shesay
s.I

hol
dmyt
ummyi
nandpushmychestf
orwar
d.

“
Lookatt
hesebabi
es.
”Shehasmybr
east
sin

herhandsgent
lycuppi
ngt
hem.Shebends

downandt
akesmyoneni
ppl
einhermout
h.

Thecont
rastofhercol
dtongueagai
nstmy

heat
edski
nshoot
sanel
ect
ri
cti
ngl
est
rai
ght

t
omypussy
.Icanonl
yhol
dont
oher

shoul
der
sassheal
ter
nat
esbet
weenmyt
wins.

Shel
ovesmyboobsIcant
ell
byt
hewayshe

wor
shi
pst
hem.Imanaget
oloosenherhai
r

andbur
ymyf
inger
sini
t.Onceshei
ssat
isf
ied

wi
thherj
obshecomesupt
ocapt
uremyl
i
ps

i
nher
s.I
’
m ashaki
ngar
ousedmessr
ight

now.Herbei
ngf
ull
clot
hedagai
nstmynaked

ski
nfuel
smyf
ir
efr
om wi
thi
n.

“
Mmmhmm .Monde.Ineedy
our
ightnow.
”

“
Letmet
akecar
eofy
ou.
”Shemur
mur
s

agai
nstmyl
i
ps.Thent
rai
l
swetki
ssesdown

unt
ilshei
skneel
i
ngi
nfr
ontofme.Icanf
eel

herbr
eat
hagai
nstmyheat
edcor
e.Shet
akes
awhi
f.“
Myf
uck!
”herv
oicei
sthi
ckwi
th

ar
ousal
.Thenshel
i
ftsmyonel
egandbal
ance

i
tov
erhershoul
der
.If
eel
thet
ipofhert
ongue

agai
nstmycl
i
tandmywhol
ecor
econt
ract
s

wi
thneed.Ihol
dherheadf
orbal
ance.She

pl
acest
hef
latofhert
ongueonmyheat
ed

v
ulv
aandt
akesabi
gswi
pe.Thensheopens

mywetf
oldsandst
art
sfeast
ing.I
tfeel
sso

good.Ihav
emybackl
eani
ngagai
nstt
hewal
l

andenj
oyt
her
ide.Al
lIcandoi
smumbl
emy

pr
aisesofhert
onguej
ob.Sheappl
i
esmor
e

pr
essur
eonmyengor
gedcl
i
tandmyor
gasm

doesn’
tgi
veawar
ning.Iexpl
odewi
th

pl
easur
e.Mykneesar
egi
vi
ngi
n.Shel
i
cksme

unt
ilI
’
m cl
eant
hensheget
supandsmashes

herl
i
psagai
nstmi
ne.Thet
ast
eofmypussy

f
rom herl
i
psi
sint
oxi
cat
ing.

Shepul
l
sbackandt
akesmyhandl
eadi
ngme

t
othebed.Idon’
thav
eti
met
oappr
eci
atet
he

beaut
yandt
hel
uxur
yoft
hisr
oom.Oncewe

r
eacht
hebedshegent
lypushesmeunt
ilI
’
m

hal
flay
ingoni
tasIbal
ancewi
thmyel
bows.

Thenshest
art
sst
ri
ppi
ngr
eveal
i
ngherl
ean,
fit

andsexybody
.Ther
eisnotev
enoneounceof

f
atonher
.Shemakesmef
eel
sel
fconsci
ousa

bi
tbutIcan’
ttakemyey
esof
fher
.Shei
slef
t

i
nhermat
chi
ngsexyl
acebl
ackunder
wear
.

I
’
m sal
i
vat
ing.I
nal
lmyy
ear
sIhav
enev
er

l
ust
edaf
terawomanasIam r
ightnow.I
nev
ert
houghtseei
nganakedwomanwoul
d

hav
emyi
nsi
dest
wist
edwi
thar
ousal
.She

unhooksherbr
arev
eal
i
ngherr
oundper
ky

br
east
swi
thhar
dpoi
ntedni
ppl
es.I
’
m

dr
ool
i
ng.

“
Youl
ookgor
geous,
”Isay
.Ican’
trecogni
se

myv
oice.Shehookshert
humbsonher

pant
iesandsl
owl
ypul
l
sthem of
f.Whenshe

st
andsbackupsher
eveal
shercl
eanshav
en

l
andi
ngst
ri
p.Herski
nisf
lawl
ess.Nomar
ks,

nof
at.Ienv
yatt
hesamet
imel
ust
ingov
eri
t.

It
rai
lmyey
esupherf
latt
ummypassher

t
wins.Shehasar
edf
lushonherchest

spr
eadi
ngoutt
oherneck.Myey
est
rav
elup

unt
ilt
heymeetherheat
edones.Iscoot

backwar
dsont
hebedki
cki
ngmyshoesof
f.

“
Comeher
e,”Iwhi
sper
.Shecomesont
hebed

andcr
awl
stowar
dsmel
i
keapr
edat
or

st
alki
ngi
t’
spr
ey.Shegent
lypushesmeback

unt
ilI
’
mly
ingonmybackandt
henhov
ers

abov
eme.Myhandgoest
ocuphermoundt
o

f
indherdr
enched.Ii
nser
tmymi
ddl
efi
nger

i
nsi
deherwetheatandshecl
osesherey
es

andmoans.Igoi
nandoutofherpussy

f
eel
i
ngherwal
l
scont
ractagai
nstt
he

i
ntr
usi
on.Shei
sst
il
lhov
eri
ngabov
emewi
th

herey
escl
osedr
idi
ngt
hef
eel
i
ng.Myt
humb

ci
rcl
eshercl
i
twhi
l
egoi
ngi
nandout
.She

l
osesherbal
anceandl
andsonme.Hersof
t
har
dbodysendmyboi
l
ingbl
oodcour
sing

t
hroughmyv
eins.Thenourl
i
psar
elocked

agai
nsteachot
her
.If
li
pherov
erandpl
ant

wetki
ssesonhert
rai
l
ingdownt
otheapexof

hert
highs.Oncet
her
eIopenherl
egsand

behol
dheav
en.Herpi
nkf
oldsar
egl
i
steni
ng.

Howi
sitt
hatmyv
ulv
aisdar
kandy
ether
sis

sopi
nk?Nowondermengobl
i
ndwi
thpussy
.

Thi
sthi
ngi
sbeaut
if
ul.Il
eancl
oserand

t
ent
ati
vel
yli
ckt
hesi
desofhercl
i
t.Herass

goesof
fthebedasshemoans.

“
Stopt
easi
ngbaby
,”shemumbl
es.Ibr
ingmy

f
inger
sandsepar
ateherf
oldsf
orbet
ter

accesst
henst
artf
east
ing.Herj
uicest
ast
es

sal
tyandt
ant
ali
singmybuds.Ideci
det
o

i
nser
tonef
ingerandwat
chasshel
eakssome

mor
e.Icol
l
ectal
lherj
uiceswi
thmyt
ongue

whi
l
eaddi
nganot
herf
ingerandf
ucki
ngher
.I

suckhercl
i
tandshehol
dsmyheadi
npl
ace

wi
thherassof
fthebedasshebl
essesme

wi
thmor
eofherj
uices.Sher
idesherwav
eof

heror
gasm unt
ili
t’
sov
erandt
henshe

r
elaxes.

Icr
awl
upherbodyandcapt
ureherl
i
pswi
th

mi
ne.I
’
m mor
ear
ousedt
hanev
erandIpour

al
loft
hati
ntheki
ss.Onceshepi
cksupon

myneedshet
akeschar
ge.

“
Igoty
ou.
”IswearIt
houghtIhear
dSazi
for

asecond.Ii
mmedi
atel
yshov
ethatt
hought
backt
owher
eev
ert
hehel
li
tcamef
rom.She

si
tsupandput
sherl
egst
houghmi
nei
na

sci
ssor
ingposi
ti
on.Thi
sbr
ingsourheat
ed

moundssmashedt
oget
her
.Thecont
actsends

anel
ect
ri
fyi
ngf
eel
i
ngt
hroughoutmybody
.I

hav
enev
erf
eltany
thi
ngl
i
kei
t.I
’
m unabl
eto

keepmybodyupsoIl
aybackdown.Thi
s

gi
vesherbet
teraccessasshel
i
ftsmyonel
eg

andst
art
sgy
rat
ingherhi
ps.Fuckt
hisf
eel
s

good.Hercl
i
tagai
nstmi
nedoesunspeakabl
e

t
hingst
omybody
.It
’sbey
ondpl
easur
e.I
t’
s

maddeni
ng.Ican’
tev
enputacoher
ent

sent
encet
oget
her
.

“
Yes.
..
Monde.
..
just
..
.l
ike.
..
that
..
.y
es.
..
yes

.
..
yes.
..
yes.
..
yes.
..
mmh.
”Shel
ooksl
i
kea

f
ucki
ngangel
.Herhai
rlosecr
eat
ingahal
o

ar
oundherbeaut
if
ulf
acewi
thhersexyl
i
ps

sl
i
ght
lyopen.Herey
esar
egl
azedwi
thl
ust
.

“
Baby
..
.y
ou.
..
feel
..
.so.
..
so.
..
so.
..
good,
”she

pant
s.Thenshet
wist
smyni
ppl
e.Thei
ntense

l
ookshehasonherf
acegi
vesmegoose

bumps.I
’
m socl
ose.Icanf
eel
myor
gasm

appr
oachi
ng.Sheget
sev
encl
oserandpi
cks

upherhumpi
ngspeed.Thatsendsmeov
er

t
heedge.Mybodyl
i
ter
all
yfr
eezesagai
nst

her
slocki
ngheri
npl
ace.Justt
her
ightspot

asIexpl
odei
ntoobl
i
vionandshei
sri
ght

t
her
ewi
thme.Api
nkgl
owgr
owsf
rom her

neckandspr
eadst
hroughoutherbody
.Shei
s
absol
utel
ygor
geousi
nthet
hroesofor
gasm.

Thesi
ghtwi
l
lbeast
arr
ingi
nmyf
utur
esol
o

pl
ays.Sheunt
angl
esher
sel
fandf
lopsnextt
o

me.

“
Youar
etoogoodf
oranov
icebaby
,”she

say
s.

“
I’
m af
astl
ear
ner
.Ican’
twai
ttodot
hat

agai
n.”Shet
urnst
olookatmewi
thasmi
l
e

pl
ast
eredonherf
ace.

“
Ja?
”

“
Yep.
”Andwedoi
tagai
nandagai
nunt
ilwe

succumbt
oasat
iat
edsl
eepear
lyhour
soft
he

mor
ning.

I
’
m wokenupbyt
woofmyf
avour
it
ethi
ngs.

Herscentandasmel
lofcof
fee.Iopenmy

ey
esandf
indhersi
tt
ingnextt
obe.

“
Youar
eready
!”shei
sdr
essedal
ready
.

“
Goodmor
ningsl
eepyf
ace.
”

“
What
’st
het
ime?
”Shel
ooksatherwat
ch.

“
Sixt
hir
ty.
”Isi
tupr
eveal
i
ngt
het
opofmy

boobs.Herey
esi
mmedi
atel
yzoom i
non

t
hem.I
nsat
iabl
ebi
tch.

“
Behav
e,”Isaywar
ningl
y.

“
Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
f.Youar
etoosexy
.”

“Whydi
dn’
tyouwakeme?Iwant
edt
obeat

homebef
oret
heki
dsgotupandnowI
’
m

goi
ngt
obel
atef
orwor
k.”Isayt
ryi
ngt
oget

up.Shehal
tsmymov
ementwi
thherhand.

“
Rel
ax.Enj
oyy
ourcof
fee.Ihav
etogo.I
’
ve
or
der
edacarf
rom t
hehot
elt
otakey
ou

home.
”

“
Idon'
twantt
obel
ateMonde.I
’
m st
il
lnew.
”

“
You’
l
ltel
lyourbosst
haty
ouhadan

emer
gencyt
oat
tendt
o.”Shewi
nksatme.I

t
hrowapi
l
lowather
.

“
Ijustdon’
twantt
otakeadv
ant
agebecause

ofourr
elat
ionshi
p.Weneedt
odr
awt
hel
i
ne

bet
weenourper
sonal
li
feandwor
k.”

“
Arel
ati
onshi
phuh!
”shei
spl
easedwi
th

her
sel
f.Whoi
sthi
spl
ayf
ulsexyv
ixen?

“
I’
m ser
iousMonde.
”

“
Okay
!”sher
aisesherhandsi
nsur
render
.“I
’
ll

gi
vey
ouapr
operspanki
ngf
ory
ourl
ate

comi
ng.
”Ij
ustr
oll
myey
es.“
Ser
iousl
y

t
hough.Not
hingwecangoabouti
t.Wewi
l
l

pl
anbet
teri
nthef
utur
e.NowIr
eal
l
yhav
eto

go.
”Shedi
psherheadandgi
vesmeaqui
ck

t
hor
oughki
ss.Thenshei
sgone.

Ideci
det
ogetupandcheckmyphone.Ihav
e

amessagef
rom Sazi
wishi
ngmeagood

mor
ning.Ideci
denott
orepl
y.Ineedt
oend

t
hingswi
thhi
m bef
oret
heygetanymor
e

compl
i
cat
ed.It
akeaqui
ckshowerandwear

myl
astni
ghtcl
othes.HowIhat
edoi
ngt
hat

butIhav
enochoi
ce.That
’swhathappens

wi
thspuroft
hemomentf
erbi
ng.

OncedoneIgodownst
air
stocheckoutandt
o

getmyr
ide.WhenIgethomei
t’
sal
most8
am andt
heki
dsar
ereadyt
ogo.

“
Wer
eyouatwor
kmommy
?”Nt
hant
isi
asks.

“
Yesbaby
.Ihav
etogobackagai
n.Ar
eyou

r
eady
?”

“
Nthant
isi
didn’
tfi
nishherf
ood,
”Khot
hat
so

say
s.Ihav
enot
imet
odeal
wit
hitbutI

t
hreat
enaspanki
ngi
fshedoesi
tagai
n.Ican

seeshei
snott
aki
ngmyt
hreatser
iousl
y.I

qui
ckl
ygot
omyr
oom t
ochangeandwear
e

of
f.

Byt
het
imeIgett
owor
kit
’sj
ustaf
ter9am.

Notbadconsi
der
ingI
’
m supposedt
ost
artat

9.Fi
si
wer
aisesherey
ebr
owsi
nsur
pri
sewhen

sheseesme.

“
Yhi
nigi
rl
!Di
dyouspendani
ghtwi
thy
our

boss?Bot
hofy
oubei
ngl
atet
oday
.”Mybl
ood

r
unscol
d.Whatdoessheknow?“Rel
axI
’
m

pul
l
ingy
ourl
eg.Youshoul
dseey
ourf
ace

r
ightnow.Butwhyar
eyoul
ate?Heav
y

ni
ght
?”uy
azi
thandai
ndabal
o!

“
No.Justt
hatIov
ersl
ept
.”

“
Idon’
twantt
obei
nyourshoesr
ightnow.

Yourbosswasaski
ngabouty
ouj
ustnow.
”

“
Oh.Oh.Letmegoseewhatsheneeds.
”Iput

mybagonmyt
abl
eandgot
oMonde’
sof
fi
ce.

Iknockonceandent
er.Shel
ooksupwi
tha

gl
owi
ngsmi
l
eonherf
ace.Iqui
ckl
ycl
oset
he

doorandwal
ktowar
dsher
.Shest
andst
o

meetmehal
fway
,cupsmyf
aceandki
sses
me.Herki
ssesar
ebecomi
ngadr
ugIcan’
t

l
i
vewi
thout
.Whenshest
opsI
’
m br
eat
hless.

Shewal
kst
oherdr
inkscabi
netandpour
sher

sel
fagl
assofwat
er.

“
Ifeel
li
keIhav
en’
tseeny
oui
nfor
ever
.Di
d

y
ougethomeal
ri
ght
,theki
ds?
”

“
Idi
d.Theki
dsar
efi
ne.Ij
ustdr
oppedt
hem

of
fatdaycar
e.Youwer
easki
ngf
orme?
”just

l
i
ket
hatwear
einwor
kmode.

Theweekgoespastv
eryf
astandIr
eal
i
set
hat

i
thasbecomeami
xtur
eoff
unandt
ort
uret
o

bear
oundMonde.Il
oveourst
olenki
ssesi
n

herof
fi
ce.Af
terwor
kwemakesur
eoneofus

get
sheror
gasm bef
oregoi
nghome.I
’
m

f
orev
eri
naper
pet
ual
stat
eofar
ousal
when

I
’
m ar
oundher
.Atni
ghtI
’
m haunt
edby

i
magesofher
.

Thent
her
eisSazi
.It
ri
edt
oignor
ehi
m unt
il

oneMondayhecamet
omyhousei
nthe

mi
ddl
eoft
heni
ght
.Icoul
dn’
thel
pbutgo

meethi
m.Wesatandchat
tedunt
ilear
ly

hour
soft
hemor
ning.Icoul
dseehewas

t
roubl
edbutInev
erwant
edt
opr
y.Sowe

spokeaboutmundanei
ssuesexceptwhat

r
eal
l
ybot
her
edhi
m.It
houghtofappr
oachi
ng

t
heTsi
etsi
subj
ectbutdeci
dedagai
nsti
t.I
t

di
dn’
tfeel
li
ket
her
ightt
imet
oask.Bei
ng

ar
oundhi
m mademer
eal
i
set
hatIhadmi
ssed

hi
m.Ofcour
seIdi
dn’
ttel
lhi
mthat
.Ial
so
di
dn’
tdi
vul
geanyofmyr
endezv
ouswi
th

Monde.

I
t’
sFr
idayaf
ter
noonwhenIr
ecei
veabank

not
if
icat
ion.Tsi
etsi
pai
dtheout
standi
ng

mai
ntenancemoni
es.Ial
sor
ecei
vedmyf
ir
st

paycheckandt
hatf
eltr
eal
l
ygood.Thehouse

i
sal
readyi
nthemar
ketandhasal
readyhad

t
wopeopl
evi
ewi
ngi
tdur
ingt
heweek.

Iwantt
ogocel
ebr
ate.It
rycal
l
ingLal
a.She

hasn’
tbeenanswer
ingmycal
l
sthewhol
e

week.I
tri
ngsunt
ilv
oicemai
l
.I’
m wor
ri
ed

abouther
.I’
m notsur
eweat
hert
ojustgoand

budgei
natherhouseornot
.Ideci
det
oget

mov
ersf
ort
hef
oll
owi
ngdayt
omov
etomy

newpl
ace.Mondei
sawayonbusi
ness.Il
ast

hear
dfr
om Sazi
thepr
evi
ousni
ghtdur
ingour

ev
eni
ngcal
l
swhi
chhav
ebecomeourr
out
ine

si
ncet
heni
ghti
nthecar
.Iwonderwher
ehi
s

wi
fei
swhenhespeakst
omeunt
ilIf
all

asl
eep.Ngapha.Mondecompl
ainst
hatI
’
m

nev
erav
ail
abl
eforourev
eni
ngchat
s.Fer
bing

i
sahar
djob.

IspendmyFr
idayev
eni
ngpacki
ngwi
thaunt
y

andt
heki
dshel
pingus.Ir
eal
i
set
hent
hatwe

ar
eal
lst
arv
ingandwehav
en’
tcooked

supper
.Notl
i
keIwasgoi
ngt
ocookany
way
.I

deci
deont
akeaway
.Theki
dsdon’
twantt
o

bel
eftbehi
ndsoIt
aket
hem wi
th.Wel
eav
e

aunt
yst
il
lpacki
ng.
OnourwaybackIr
eal
i
set
hati
t’
slat
e.I
t’
s

al
most21h30.Theki
dsar
eachat
terboxas

usual
int
hebackseat
.It
’st
ooqui
etont
he

r
oadespeci
all
ybei
ngaFr
idayni
ght
.JustasI

appr
oachar
edr
obott
hinki
ngI
’
m goi
ngt
o

ski
p.Ther
eisacarappr
oachi
ngwi
thar
ight

ofwaysoIst
op.Asi
finsl
owmot
ionIheara

br
eaki
ngwi
ndowandf
eel
ashar
ppai
natt
he

backofmyhead.Asi
finabl
urIseeaguni
n

myf
aceandaguyscr
eami
ngatmet
oget

out
.Iqui
ckl
yscr
ambl
eoutoft
hecarbeggi
ng

hi
mtol
etmyki
dsgo.ThemomentI
’
m outhe

hi
tst
hebackofmyheadandIpassout
.

Myey
esar
eheav
yandIf
orcet
hem opent
o

f
indmy
sel
fly
ingont
hesi
deoft
her
oad.If
eel

ashar
ppai
natt
hebackofmyheadasIf
orce

my
sel
ftogetup.Myki
ds!Ohmybabi
es!I

r
ememberput
ti
ngmyphonei
nsi
demypocket

.Isear
chf
ori
tthankt
hepower
sonhi
gh,
it’
s

st
il
lther
e.

Wi
thshaki
nghandsIcal
ltheemer
gency

numberandi
nfor
mthem ofwhathappened.

Theyt
ell
met
hatt
heyar
esendi
ngacarbuti
t

mi
ghtt
akeawhi
l
east
heyar
eshor
tst
aff
ed.

Appar
ent
lyt
her
ewasanat
tempt
edar
med

r
obber
yint
hear
ea.

I
mmedi
atel
ytheyhangupIcal
lSazi
.Hei
sal
l

Icoul
dthi
nkof
.Ir
egr
etnott
aki
nghi
sof
ferf
or

secur
it
y.Hepi
cksup.
“
Linamandl
a.”

“
Theyt
ookmyki
ds!
”Ican’
tev
enf
ini
shmy

v
oicebr
eaksast
ear
sfal
l
.

“
Cal
m downandt
ell
mewhathappened.
”It
ry

butmyv
oicei
sbr
eaki
ng.

“
Stayput
.I’
m onmyway
.Li
stenIneedt
o

hangupsoIcancal
lsomeone.I
’
m onmyway

baby
.I’
l
lbet
her
einaf
ew.
”Myhandsar
est
il
l

shaki
ngbadl
y.Hehangsup.Myheadi
sheav
y

butIt
ryt
ofi
ghtt
hesl
eept
hatwant
sto

ov
ercomeme.Ican’
taf
for
dtopassoutagai
n.

Whyar
ether
enoot
hercar
sont
hisr
oad?

Subur
bscanbeadeadl
ytr
apatt
imes.

I
naf
ewmi
nut
esIseeheadl
i
ght
s

appr
oachi
ng.Pol
i
cecarwoul
dhav
easi
ren.

SoIknowi
t’
snott
hen.Myhear
tbeatst
art
s

accel
erat
ingi
nfearWhati
fit
sthem comi
ng

backt
ofi
nishmeof
f?Theypar
kont
hesi
de

andt
woguy
sgetout
.Idr
agmybodyonmy

f
eetandt
ryt
orun.Idon’
tmakeev
ent
wo

st
epsbef
oret
heoneguycat
chesmei
nhi
s

ar
ms.

“
MsSoml
otha,
don’
tbeal
armedMrKhumal
o

sentus.
”Justt
henIheart
yresscr
eechi
ngand

adoorbangi
ng.

“
Igoty
oubaby
.Nowt
ell
mewhathappened.
”

Icanbar
elykeepmyey
esopenbutIknowi
t’
s

Sazi
.“Fuckshehasacutonherhead.Shei
s

bl
eedi
ngbadl
y.
”It
’sget
ti
ngf
ogyagai
nand
t
heni
t’
sli
ght
sout
.

IknowI
’
minhospi
tal
themomentIopenmy

ey
es.If
eel
pai
nasi
ffr
om adi
stance.I
t’
sdul
l

buti
t’
sther
e.IguessI
’
m heav
il
ymedi
cat
ed.

Myey
esscant
her
oom andIf
indSazi
ont
he

ot
hersi
deoft
her
oom paci
ng.Whenhesees

t
hatI
’
m awakehehangsupandr
ushes

t
owar
dsme.

“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”heasksconcer
n

appar
enti
nhi
stone.

“
Myheadf
eel
sheav
y.Di
dthepol
i
cear
ri
ve?

I
t’
sTsi
etsi
isn’
t.Het
ookt
hem.Wher
eismy

phone?
”It
ryt
osi
tupbutt
hepai
nbecomes

i
ntense.“
Mhhh.
”Il
i
eback.

“
Linamandl
acal
m down.Her
e.”Hegi
vesmea

gl
assofwat
er.Idon’
twantwat
er.Howi
sit

goi
ngt
obr
ingmybabi
esback?

“
Sazi
!Idon'
twantwat
er!
”Isnap.Heput
sthe

gl
assbackdownandgi
vesmemyphone.

“
Thepol
i
cear
eout
sidewai
ti
ngt
otakey
our

st
atement
.”InodasIwai
tfort
heTOSt
opi
ck

up.Sazi
takesmyhandi
nhi
s.

“
Wher
ethehel
lar
emyki
ds?
”hei
saski
ng

me?Thener
veoft
hisman.

“
Don’
tpl
aygameswi
thmey
ousonofabi
tch.

Iwantmyki
ds!Br
ingbackmyki
ds!
”myhead

i
snowpoundi
ng.Anur
secomesi
nandf
iddl
es

wi
tht
hedr
ip.“
Idon’
twantanymor
e

medi
cat
ion.Taket
hisof
f,
”Ii
nst
ructt
henur
se.
Shei
gnor
esme.

“
Lona.Wher
ear
eyou?
”Tsi
etsi
asks.

“
Don’
tpr
etendl
i
key
oudi
dn’
tsendt
hose

goons.Pl
easeTsi
etsi
.Don’
tdot
his.Wecan

wor
ksomet
hingout
,”Ibeg.Ihearhi
mtakea

hugebr
eat
h.

“
List
enLona.Idi
dn’
ttaket
hem Iswear
.Your

boy
fri
endal
readysentpeopl
etosear
chmy

houseandmybusi
ness.Isweart
oyou,
I

woul
dn’
thar
mthoseki
ds.Theyar
emyl
i
fe.
”I

canhearr
esi
gnat
ionandf
eari
nhi
stone.

“
Ify
oudon’
thav
ethem t
henwhodoes?Oh

mywor
d!Myki
ds!
”Ihangupt
ofi
ndSazi

l
ooki
ngatme.“
Hedoesn’
thav
ethem!
”

“
Iknow.Ihav
epeopl
elooki
ngf
ort
hem.We

wi
l
lfi
ndt
hem.Ipr
omi
se.
”Iam t
err
if
iedr
ight

now.Thepost
sabouthumant
raf
fi
cki
ngr
epl
ay

i
nmyhead.Ir
ememberi
gnor
inganar
ti
cle

abouthowqui
ckhumant
raf
fi
cki
ngv
ict
ims

exchangehands.

“
Theycoul
dbeoutoft
hecount
rybynowt
o

Godknowswher
e.”I
’
m gr
ippedwi
thf
ear
.

“
Lona.Youhav
etocomedown.Ineedt
ogo

seesomeone.
”Ij
umpof
fthebedt
aki
ngout

t
hedr
ipmy
sel
f.Thenur
sej
ustl
eftwi
thout

t
aki
ngi
tout
.

“
I'
m comi
ngwi
thy
ou.
”

“
Noy
ouar
enot
.”

“
Sazi
Isweart
oyouI
’
llscr
eam t
hishospi
tal
down.Ican’
tsi
ther
eandwai
tfort
he

unknown.I
twi
l
ldr
ivemecr
azy
.Pl
ease.
”He

v
igor
ousl
yscr
atcheshi
sheadwi
thbot
h

hands.

“
Fuck!
”hepacesaf
ewst
eps.“
Youpr
omi
se

nott
oaskanyquest
ionsunt
ilt
hisi
sov
er?
”I

nodmyhead.“
Lona.Idon’
thav
eti
mef
or

games.Youf
oll
owmyl
eadnoquest
ions

asked,
”hewar
nsagai
n.

“
Yes.Iswear
.”

“
Getdr
essed,
”hecl
i
psandwal
ksout
.Idr
ag

mybodyandt
ryt
odr
essasqui
ckl
yasIcan.

Byt
het
imeI
’
m doneI
’
m sweat
ing.Sazi

comesbackandgi
vesmet
wot
abl
ets.

“
Whatar
ethesef
or?
”

“
They
'l
lhel
pwi
tht
hepai
n.”It
aket
hem wi
tha

whol
egl
assofwat
er.Iwast
hir
styaf
teral
l
.

Wef
indt
hepol
i
ceout
sidet
hewar
dwai
ti
ng.

Hepr
omi
sest
obr
ingmet
othepol
i
cest
ati
on

i
nthemor
ning.Theyagr
eeandl
eav
e.

Hel
eadst
hewayt
ohi
scar
.It
’sabl
ack

Ni
ssanGTRwi
tht
int
edwi
ndows.Il
ookathi
m

andr
eal
i
set
hisi
sadi
ff
erentSazi
.Heopens

t
hedoorf
ormeandgoesar
oundt
ohi
ssi
de.

Whenhest
art
sthecarIknowi
t’
sti
met
o

wearmyseatbel
t.Hepul
l
soutoft
hepar
king

atsuchhi
ghspeedmyhear
tlur
chest
omy

t
hroat
.Wedr
ivei
nsi
l
ence.Mymi
ndi
s

conj
uri
ngupal
lsor
tsofdar
kscenar
ios.The
f
eart
hathasgr
ippedmei
sunexpl
ainabl
e.I

r
eal
i
set
hatIhav
en’
tspokent
oaunt
y.She

mustbewor
ri
ed.Isendherat
ext
.

Wear
edr
ivi
ngi
ntoadar
kar
eawi
thnost
reet

l
i
ght
sany
mor
e.Nohousesei
therj
ustshacks.

Ev
ery
onei
slooki
ngt
oseewho’
scart
hisi
s.

Whodar
escomei
ntot
hei
rter
ri
tor
yatt
his

t
ime?Whatsur
pri
sesmei
sthati
t’
sal
most

ear
lyhour
soft
hemor
ningbutt
hepl
acei
s

buzzi
ng.Wenav
igat
ethr
ought
heshacksunt
il

wer
eachanhi
ghwal
lmadeofst
eel
wit
ha

si
mil
argat
e.Thi
swal
loccupi
est
hebi
ggest

ar
ea.Ir
egr
etpr
omi
singnott
oaskquest
ions.

Whobui
l
dssuchi
nacent
reofi
mikhukhu?A

t
hug?Someonewhowant
stohi
de?Wi
thhow

wegother
enotev
ent
hepol
i
cewoul
dbeabl
e

t
o.

Wewai
tforaf
ewmi
nut
eswi
thnoact
ionand

t
hent
hegat
eopens.I
tpar
tsf
rom t
hemi
ddl
e

t
orev
eal
anor
dinar
yhousenot
hingf
ancy
.

Wei
rd.

Aswedr
ivei
nInot
icet
ruckspar
kedonone

si
deoft
hey
ard.Al
otoft
hem.Thi
spl
acei
s

massi
ve.Wedr
ivei
nandpar
kri
ghtIf
rontof

t
hehouse.

Themomentwegetoutt
woguy
sfr
om no

wher
ecomeandpatSazi
.Justast
heonei
s

aboutt
ocomef
orme,
Sazi
stopshi
m.

“
Youar
enott
ouchi
ngher
!”hi
stonei
sfi
nal
anddeadl
y.I
’
m ev
enscar
edofhi
m.Theguyi
s

unsur
eofhowt
opr
oceed.Theot
herone

si
gnal
swi
thhi
sey
esf
orhi
mtol
etgo.They

opent
hedoorf
orusandwegoi
nsi
de.

Thehouseseemsbi
ggert
hani
tlooksf
rom t
he

out
side.Justaswewal
kinaguymay
be

Sazi
’
sageorsl
i
ght
lyol
dercomesoutf
rom

t
hepassagei
nhi
srobe.

“
Mot
herf
uckert
hishasbet
terbegood.Doy
ou

f
ucki
ngknowwhatt
imei
tis?Fuck!Youhav
e

not
imi
ng.Iwasaboutt
ohi
titt
henIgety
our

cal
lyoust
upi
dFuck!
”hesay
sal
lthi
swhi
l
e

appr
oachi
ngus.Thenheembr
acesSazi
wit
h

af
fect
ion.

“
SupBheki
.
”

“
Yhi
niwangv
usaebusuku?
”Bheki
asks.

“
Canweatl
easthav
easeat
?”

“
Yousof
ull
ofshi
t.
”Het
urnsar
oundandwe

f
oll
owhi
mint
oal
i
vingr
oom.At
ypi
cal
man’
s

cr
ib.Bl
ackev
ery
thi
ng.Nof
emal
etouchwhat
’s

soev
er.Weal
lsi
tdownandBheki
wai
tsf
or

Sazi
tospeak.

“
Thi
sisLona,
afr
iendofmi
ne.Shewas

hi
j
ackedear
li
eronandshehadhert
wol
i
ttl
e

onesi
nthecar
.”

“
Fucker
s!Theyt
ookt
heki
ds.
”It
sast
atement
.

“
Yep.
”

“
Het
akeshi
sphoneoutoft
hepocketand

cal
l
ssomeone.
“
Wher
ewast
his?
”heasksSazi
.

“
Bedf
ordv
iew,
”Sazi
responds.

“
Hij
acki
ngear
li
ert
hisev
eni
ng.I
nBedf
ord.Two

ki
dswer
etaken.Ja.Mot
her
fucker
!Shar
p.”He

hangsupandl
ooksatme.Hemakesmef
eel

uneasy
.Hehast
hatcal
m aur
aar
oundhi
m

buti
t’
sver
ydecei
vi
ng.Thi
soneIcanbetmy

l
astcent
,hei
sdeadl
y.Thequest
ioni
show

doesSazi
fiti
n?Mor
eper
ti
nentquest
ioni
s

whatdi
dhef
indoutf
rom t
hatcal
l
?Idon’
t

l
i
ket
hel
ookhehas.

Chapt
er13

“
Idon'
twannabr
ag,
butI
'
llbe

Thebesty
ouev
erhad

Ihi
tyouwi
tht
hebestst
roke

Fr
eest
yleandt
hebr
east
str
oke

Ti
lyoubl
owaci
gar
ett
esmoke

Andnowt
hebed'
sbr
oke

Sowhatwegon'
donow

Roundt
wonow

Wor
kitout
,thenwecool
down,
cool
down”
-JohnLegend

“Whohaveyoubeenmessi
ngwi
th?
”Bheki
asksme.Sazi
issi
l
ent
lywat
chi
ngmeasi
f
uni
nter
est
ed.

“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhohav
eIbeenmessi
ngwi
th?
”
“Yourbabi
esarehel
dupbyaNi ger
ianmob.Theseguy
sdon’tf
uckar
ound.Theyhaveno
consci
enceandtheywon’
tevenbli
nkaboutki
ll
i
ngachil
d.”Mybodyf
eel
sthechil
ls.Hesay
sit
l
ikeheistal
ki
ngabouttheweather
.

“
Mfet
hu!
”Sazi
war
ns.Icanf
eel
mywhol
ebodyshaki
ngf
rom wi
thi
n.

“
Idon’tknowanyNi
ger
ians!
”Myv
oicecomesoutasasqueak.Exceptf
ort
hel
adyt
hatdoesmy
weaves.

“Someonedoes,
”Bheki
isl
ooki
ngatmesuspect
.Sazi
leansbackwi
thhi
sheadf
aci
ngt
he
ceil
i
ng.

“
Yourexmi
ght
.”Whati
sTsi
etsi
int
o?Bheki
looksatSazi
quest
ioni
ngl
y.

“
Ex?
”

“
Maseel
a’
sson,
”Sazi
say
ssof
tl
y.Bheki
’
sey
eswi
deni
nappar
entshock.

“
Howdi
dyougeti
nvol
vedi
nthat
?”Bheki
asks.

“
Iof
fer
edt
opayhergr
ocer
ies,
”hehasanamusedl
ookonhi
sface.

“Fucker
!Youarenotmaki
ngsense.Nowquitpl
ayi
ng.Doyouhav
eanyi
deahowmuchshi
tis
pil
edatyourdoor
step?
”Bheki
isnotamused.Sazi
sobersup.

“RelaxBhekumuzi
andt
ell
uswhaty
ouknow.
”Aboutdamnt
ime.I
'
m expl
odi
ngwi
thanxi
etyov
er
here.

“
Someonehaspokedasl
eepi
ngsnakef
rom i
tsnest
.”Hekeepsqui
etagai
n.

“
Bheki
!”Sazi
prompt
shi
m.
“Fuckenshit
.Mot
herfucker
!Idon’tneedthi
sshit
!”hei
suponhisf
eetandpaci
ng.Sazi
seems
tobelett
inghimvent
.Iwanttojumpi nandquesti
onhi
m butIr
ememberIwastol
dnotto
questi
on.Heswif
tlyt
urnspoint
ingatSazi.

“I’
m doingfuckal
lforMaseel
a’sof
fspri
ng!”Sazi
looksathim bl
ankly
.Mycur i
osi
tyispeaked.
Whoi sSazi r
eall
y?WheredoesTsiet
sifi
tinhisl
if
e?Iremembert heint
err
uptedconversat
ionat
Budmar sh.Thereismoretothi
smant hanmeetstheeye.Ineedtofindoutbutobvi
ouslynot
tonight
.

“Fuckenshit!Lomgodoy i
!Nowayi nhellI
’l
lcrossTayoforhim.Doy ouknowTay o?Thatniggais
crazy.YouthinkI’
m crazy?Hell
!Ihavenothingonthatmotherf
ucker!Hehasconnect i
ons
everywhere.Connecti
onsI ’
dli
ketokeepf ormybusiness.Ther
ear ecert
ainpeopleyoudon’t
stepont hei
rtoesifyouwantt osurvi
veinthisbusi
ness.Tayoisoneoft hem.”Heissti
llpaci
ng.
Justthenasmal lpeti
tehomel yl
ookingwomancomest hroughfrom thepassageti
ghteningher
robe.Themomentshespot sSazishesqueals.

“Sazi
!Ididn’
tknowyouwereher e!
”sheexcl
aimsal
mostr unni
ngtowar
dshim.Hei sonhisf
eet
i
nstantlywit
hasmi l
eonhi
sf ace.Shefl
i
ngshersel
finhi
sar msandhecatcheshertwi
rli
ngher
around.Thenaquickki
ssont heli
ps.Astabofj
eal
ousycut st
hroughmeatthedispl
ay.He
eventuall
ypl
acesheonherfeetbutsti
ll
holdi
ngeachother’
shand.

“
Lookaty
ou.Youst
il
lasbeaut
if
ulasev
er,
”hecompl
ement
s.Shebl
ushes.

“
Stopit.Whydi
dn’ty
ousayyouwerecomi
ng?Icoul
d'
vear
rangedf
ort
heki
dst
obeher
etosee
t
heiruncl
e.”Myhear
tset
tl
esabit
.

“I
twasn'
tpl
annedbabe.I
’
llmaketi
met
ogov i
sitthem.Howar
eyou?
”funnyt
hingBheki
is
obli
vi
oust
othischat
.Heisinhi
sownwor
ldpacing.

“
I’
mfi
ne.Pr
egnantagai
n.”

“
Damn!Howmanyki
dsy
oupl
anonmaki
ng?
”
“
Don’
tbest
upid.Act
uall
ythi
sonewasr
eal
l
yunpl
annedbutabl
essi
ngnonet
hel
ess.
”It
hink
t
heyhav
efor
gottenaboutme.

“Congrat
ulat
ionssi
s.Nowstopi
talr
eady
!”Theybot
hlaugh.I
’
m st
il
lst
uckonsi
s.I
sthi
shi
s
sist
er?Buttherei
snoresembl
ancewhat
soever.

“
Andnowt
hisone?
”Shegest
urest
oBheki
wit
hherhead.

“
Oh!hei
sdebati
ngwit
hhimsel
f.Pr
ocessi
ngsomeinf
ormati
on.I
’m bei
ngrude,l
etmeint
roduce
y
ou.Thi
sisLi
namandl
a,Li
namandl
athisi
smysist
erSanel
i
siwe.AlsoBheki
’swif
e.”

“
Pleasedt
omeety
ou,
Lina,
shesay
sgi
vi
ngmeherhand.Hergr
ipi
sfi
rm.

“
IgobyLona.Pl
easedt
omeety
out
oo.
”Shel
etsgoofmyhand.

“
Yourwi
feknowsshei
sher
e.”Yho!

“
It
’sanunpl
annedv
isi
tSane,
”hesay
s.

“
Don’
tinv
olv
emei
nyourshi
t!
”shesay
s.

“
Iwoul
dnev
er!
”Idet
ectannoy
ancei
nhi
stone.

“
Don’
tst
artnow.Youknowhei
smar
ri
edr
ight
?”Sheaddr
essesme.

“
Yes.Not
hingi
sgoi
ngonbet
weenus.
”I’
mter
ri
fi
edofher
.Shechuckl
esanddi
smi
ssesme.

“
Bhekisi
tdownbeforey
oubor
eahol
einmycar
pet
.”Bheki
immedi
atel
ycomest
osi
tnextt
oher
.
Wearenowallseat
ed.
“Weneedt omov efast.Tonight
,wellthi
smor ni
ng.Theyjusttookthem sotheywon’ tbe
expecti
nganyoner i
ghtaway .Thequickerwedoi tt
hesafertheywillbe.BecauseIcant el
lyou
thi
s,nomat t
erwhatheasksi nexchangeevenifyougivehim, t
heyarenotcomi ngbackal i
ve.
Theniggaisr ut
hlessandlikesmakingst at
ements.
”I’
m aboutt opeemy selfandfeeli
ngdizzy
withfear
.

“
Howdowegett
ohi
m?”Sazi
asks.

“
Iknowaguywhocanl
ocat
ehi
shi
dingspot
.Thenaf
terI
t'
sjustmeandy
ou.
”

“
No.Bheki
.Igoal
one.
”Sazi
cli
ps.

“Youfuckenidiot
.Yout hi
nkI’
dletyouwal kintoali
onsdenbyy oursel
f?Thisisnotaboardroom.
Comesui tup.”Hestandsandmov esthecof f
eetabl
etotheside.Pressesabuttonandthent he
fl
oorsli
desopenr eveali
ngastaircase.“Let
’sgo.”Him andSaziwalkdownt hestai
rs.Iwantto
fol
lowbutSanei ssti
llsit
ti
ngdownwat chi
ngmewi t
hablanklookonherf ace.

“
Whati
sity
ouhav
einv
olv
edmybr
otheri
n?”hert
onei
scol
dandaccusi
ng.

“Iwashi
jackedear
li
erandt
heyt
ookmyki
ds.
”Herf
acesof
tensi
mmedi
atel
y.Shequi
ckl
y
scrambl
estowardsme.

“Youpoort
hing.Ar
eyouokay
?”hert
onet
hreat
enst
obr
eakmybar
elyt
her
ecomposur
e.Ij
ust
nod.

“
Iwantt
hem back,
”Isayf
eel
i
ngt
ear
sbur
nmyey
es.

“They’
ll
bringthem backy
oucancountont
hosetwo.I
’l
lmaket ea.Shegetsupandleav
e.Afew
minuteslatert
hetwocomebackup.Theyhavebul
l
etproofvestson.Bhekii
sst
il
lcocki
nghi
s
gun.IcanseeSazi hashi
stuckedi
nhi
swaist
.Myterr
orint
ensifi
es.

“
I’
m comi
ngwi
th!
”Iexcl
aimt
hemomentt
heyar
eint
her
oom.
“
Nof
uckenway
!”Theybot
hsayi
nuni
son.

“
It
’smyki
ds!
”I’
drat
herdi
ewi
tht
hem t
hanl
i
vewi
thoutt
hem.

“Li
stensweethear
tIai
n’
tgonnagetmyassshotbecauseofyou.Si
tyourassdownandwai
tfor
ustobringyourki
dshome,
”Bhekisay
s.Heisnoti
mpr essed.

“
Excuseus.”Sazi
grabsmyarm andpull
smeoutsi
de.Oncethere,
hehasmeupagai
nstt
hewal
l
wi
thhishandsonthewall
eit
hersideofmyf
ace.Heispissed.

“
Linamandl
a,doy
out
rustme?
”

“
Yes,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Thenall
owmet odot hi
s,al
one.Ican’
thavey
oucapt
uredaswel
l.Ineedtofocuswit
hout
worryi
ngaboutyou.Iwantthem backt
oo.Ipr
omi
seI’
llbr
ingt
hem back.
”Icanbarel
yseehis
eyesinthedar
kast heyscanmyf ace.

“
Okay
.”

“Goodgirl
.”Hepull
smei nhi
sarmsandhol
dsmetight.Ihookmyhandsaroundhi
swai
stand
hughim back.Icanfeel
twogunst
uckedi
n.Myheartstart
spoundi
ng.It
ight
enmyhol
dandhe
pull
smecl oser.

“
I’
m scar
edSazi
,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Wear egoingt
obefine,
”hewhispersagainstmyneck.Thenhepul l
soutandt i
ltmyheadthen
dipshisheadtocapt
uremyl i
psinaquickkiss.Thenhel etsgo.Wegobackt othehouset
of i
nd
BhekiwithSaneagai
nstthewallki
ssi
nghungr i
ly.Theymi ghtaswellbefucki
ng.Sazicl
ear
shis
throat
.Theyevent
ual
lyuntangl
efrom eachother.Theysayt hei
rgoodbyesandt hent
heyare
gone.WhenIcheckthetimeit’
salmost2am.Icanf eel
myheadst arti
ngt oache.
“I
’
llmaket eaagain.TheoneImadei
scol
d.”Ij
ustnodandgositonthecouch.Icheckmy
phone.If
indt womi ssedcal
l
sandamessagefr
om Monde.I
t’
sweird.Shenevercontact
sme
aft
ermid-night.

~Ihadabaddr
eam.Iwasj
ustchecki
ngi
nony
ou.Youar
epr
obabl
ysl
eepi
ng~

Ideci
det
ocal
lher
.Itr
ingst
wiceandshepi
cksup.

“
Babe.
”Shesoundsv
eryawake.

“
Arey
ounotsl
eepi
ng?
”Iask.

“I
’
vebeentossi
ngandtur
ning.Ican’
tsl
eep.Whyar
eyouupatt
hist
ime?
”al
lthet
ear
sI’
vebeen
holdi
ngi
ncomef l
oodi
ng.Ican’
tspeak.

“Lonayouarescar
ingme.What ’
sgoingon?
”I’
mt ry
ingt
ocomposemysel
fbutI
’
mf ai
li
ng.Iwi
sh
shewashereri
ghtnow.Wait
ingwi t
hme.SanecomesbackandwhensheseesI
’m onthe
phoneshepl
acesthecupinfrontofmeandleavesagai
n.“
Lona.
”

“
Iwashi
j
ackedear
li
er.
..
”

“
What
?Ar
eyouokay
?Wher
e?Ohmywor
dLona!Whydi
dn’
tyoucal
lme?
”

“
Ther
eismor
e.”Thesi
l
encei
sdeaf
eni
ng.

“
Whati
tis?
”hert
onei
scal
m.

“
Theyt
ookt
heki
ds.
”Ihearhergasp.

“
No.Noway
.No.
”
“
I’
m sot
err
if
iedMonde.
”

“
WhatcanIdo?
”

“
Wecanonl
ywai
t.Af
ri
endofmi
net
hinkshehasf
oundal
ead.Sot
heyar
efol
l
owi
nguponi
t.
”

“
Lona.Iknowpeopl
ewhocanhel
p.”

“Let
’sgi
vemyguyachanceandsee.Idon’twantt
ojeopar
diset
hei
rchances.
”It
rustSazi
to
bri
ngthem back.Don’
taskmehow.Ij
ustdo.

“I
fnothi
nghappensbymorni
ngletmeknow.I
’
m goi
ngt
otaket
hef
ir
stf
li
ghtout
.IfnotI
’
llseei
fI
can’
torgani
setheRi
char
dsJet.
”

“
Okay.Butdon’
tcancel
yourmeet
ingbabe.Whatar
ey ougoi
ngt
odowheny
ougether
e?Fi
nish
whatyouhavet
oIknowhowi mport
antthosemeet
ingsare.
”

“
Notmor
eimpor
tantt
hany
ou.
”Thatmakesmehappy
.ThenIchast
isemy
sel
f.Toosoon.

“
I’
ll
feel
badwheny
oucancel
.Dowhaty
ouhav
etodo.I
’
llkeepy
oupost
ed.
”

“
Okaybaby
.St
ayst
rong.Youandt
heki
dswi
l
lbei
nmyt
hought
s.Tr
yandgetsomer
est
.”

“
ThankyouMonde.
”Shehangsup.Idr
inkmyt
ea.Nor
estIcanhav
eunt
ilmyki
dsr
etur
n.Sane
r
etur
ns.

“
Yourmanont
hephone,
”shesay
s.I
t’
smor
eli
keast
atementt
hanaquest
ion.

“
Yes.
”Icanseet
her
eli
efi
nherey
es.“
Doy
ouhav
epai
nki
l
ler
s?Myheadi
sst
art
ingagai
n.”She
get
supandcomesbackwi
tht
wot abl
ets.Idr
inkt
hem wi
thtea.Wesi
tandwai
t.Ther
eisn’
t
mucht
alki
nggoi
ngon.I
’mr
eal
lynotinthemoodforsmallt
alk.

I’
m wokenupbysomecommot i
on.Istr
uggletogetmybeari
ngsinorder.Whenital
lcomes
toget
herIreal
isewhereI’
m atandIjumptogocheck.Igettothedoortofi
ndthetwoguysfrom
l
astnightcarr
yingaunconsci
ousandbl oodi
edBheki.Sanei
samess.Myey esfi
ndSazihe
seemsabi tpale.I
’
mtooscaredtoask.Myey esarescanni
ngtheareaformykids.

“
Sazi
.”Myv
oicecomesoutasawhi
mper
.

“
Comewi
thme.
”Hei
shol
dinghi
ssi
de.Ir
eal
i
sehei
sal
sobl
eedi
ng.

“
Youar
ebl
eedi
ng,
”Ist
ateasIf
oll
owhi
mtot
hecar
.

“Nothi
ngseri
ous.Abul
letgrazedme.
”Heopenst
hebackseatofhi
scarandher
etheyar
e.
Sleepi
ng.Rel
i
efwashesov erme.

“
What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hem?Ar
etheydr
ugged?
”Iwhi
sper
.

“No.Theymustbet i
red.Theywer eter
rifi
edwheretheywere.”HebendsandscoopsKhothat
so
i
nhi sarms.Icanseehei sinpain.Idot hesamewi t
hNthati
si andfol
l
owhimtothehouse.A
paleSaneshowsust oasparebedr oom.Wepl acethem onthebedandtuckthem i
n.Ipl
ant
kissesal
loverthei
rfaces.I
’m sogratefulIcan’
tevenart
icul
ateit.

“Lona.Comewi
thme. ”Il
eav
ethedoorsl
i
ghtl
yopenandf
oll
owSazi
tot
hel
ounge.Adoct
or
goespasstowhatIassumetobethemainbedr
oom.

“
IsBheki
okay
?”

“
Yeshewi
l
lbe.He’
sbeent
hroughwor
se.
”

“
Youar
ehur
ttoo.Letmesee,
”Isaysi
tt
ingnextt
ohi
m.
“I
’
mf ine.Li
sten.Theki
dshavet
ostayhereforat
odayt
henmov
ethem t
oasaf
epl
ace.
”Ishe
crazy
?Apl acetheydon’
tknowaft
ert
heirt
rauma.

“
Why
?Ihav
ewor
ktodo.Ican’
tst
ayher
e.”

“Notyou.Justthekidsandt hei
rnanny.Theguyt hatkidnappedt hem mightsti
ll
comeaf ter
them.Wedi dn’tgethimjusthi sgoons.Hei
sgoi ngtoretali
ate.Rightnowhewon' tsuspectyou.
Hewi l
lsuspectTsietsiandhi sfat
herandgoafterthem.Whi char et heonesheshouldbe
deali
ngwi t
hint hefi
rstplace.Heknowsy oudon’tmat terwit
hTsi etsisohewon’tbotherwit
h
you.Butthekidsarehi sinsurancetolur
eTsi
etsi i
n.”Thisismor edanger oust
hanIthought.

“
Unt
ilwhen?
”Thet
houghtofbei
ngwi
thoutmyki
dsi
ssi
ckeni
ng.

“Unti
lthi
smessi sclear
edout.Wewi llfl
ythem toasafecompoundwheretheywil
lbewith
Bheki’
skids.Theplaceischi
ldfri
endlyandv er
ysecured.Butwecanonl
ygetthem outi
ntwo
days.Isentsomeonet ofet
chyournanny .Youneedtogohomeandpr etendtobethe
dist
raughtmotherwiththepoli
ce.”Thisisgett
ingcomplicat
ed.

“
Idon’
tknowi
fIcandot
his.
”

“
Trustme.
”

“
Okay
.”Hehasasheenofsweatonhi
sfor
ehead.

“
Youneedmedi
cal
att
ent
ion,
”Isay
.

“
Hay
imanj
e.Wehav
etogety
ouhome.
”

“
Rightnow!Can’
tIwai
tfort
heki
dst
owakeup?
”

“
Thepol
i
cehav
etof
indy
ouhomeandwecan’
ttakeachanceofusbei
ngseencomi
ngoutof
her
e.”Justthenaunt
yLy
diacomesthr
oughlooki
ngscar
edandconf
used.Shei
srel
i
evedt
osee
me.Shethrowsherarmsaroundmehuggi
ngme.

“
Yhosi
sibendot
huki
l
e!”sheexcl
aims.

“
Wear
efi
neaunt
y.”

“
Wher
ear
etheki
ds?
”

“
Theyar
eal
sof
inej
ustsl
eepi
ng.
”

“
CanIseet
hem?
”

“
Beforeyougo.Pl
easet
akeaseat.
”Webot
hsi
tdown.Iexpl
aint
oherwhathappenedandal
so
l
etherknowwhatneedstobedone.

“
Don’
twor
rysi
si.Wehav
etodoal
lwecant
okeept
hem saf
e.”

“Iwi
ll
makeaplantobringyourcl
othes.
”Iwalkhertot
hebedroom wher et
hekidsar
esleeping.
Shescoot
snexttothem andcuddl
eswi t
hthem.Iknowthenthattheyareingoodhands.Iwalk
outcl
osi
ngthedoorbehindme.JustthenSanewalksoutoft
heirbedroom.

“
Howi
she?
”Iask.

“He’
l
l befi
ne.Theyremovedthebul
l
et.I
tdi
dn’
thi
tanymaj
oror
gans.Hei
srest
ingnow.
”Ican
seetherel
iefal
loverherf
ace.

“
Thankgoodness.
”Wewal
kbackt
othel
ounget
ofi
ndSazi
onhi
sfeet
.Hedoesn’
tlookgood.

“Wehav
etogo,
”hesays.Igiv
eSaneahugandpr
omisetoseehersoon.Shepr
omi
sest
otake
car
eofmybabi
es.Onceoutsi
deSazi
giv
esmethekeys.
“
Dri
ve.
”Hecl
i
psandopenst
hedoorf
orme.

“
Iwon'
tremembermywayout
.”Ii
mmedi
atel
yfeel
li
keI
’
m bei
ngunnecessar
y.

“
I’
ll
dir
ecty
ou.
”Hei
sst
il
lhol
dingt
ohi
ssi
de.

Igeti
nandstartt
hecar.Theadrenali
nthatcoursest
hroughmybodyasitvi
brat
esisamazing.
Hedir
ect
smeunt ilweareoutthenIfiguremywayhome.Her est
shisheadandcloseshi
sey es.
Ipani
cabitandputmyf i
ngeragainsthisnose.

“
I’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hingbaby
.”

I
t’
sjustaf
ter5am whenwegett omyhouse.Iuseaunt
y’skey
stogeti
n.Ipar
kthecari
nsi
de
t
hegarage.Thensl
ight
lyshakehi
mtowakehi m up.

“
Youneedt
omov
etoy
ournewpl
ace.
”

“
Iwaspl
anni
ngt
omov
etoday
.Mostofmyst
affi
spacked.
”

“
Waitacoupl
eofdaystheny
oucanmov
e.I
’
llhav
easecur
it
ydet
ail
wat
chi
ngy
out
hough.
”We
wal
kthr
oughthehouse.

“
Youwantsomecof
fee?
”Iasksuddenl
yner
vous.

“
Ineedtocl
eant
hiswoundandr
estabi
t.Ther
eisaf
ir
stai
dki
tint
hebootandabot
tl
eof
whi
skey
.”

“Comet
omyr
oom t
henI
’
llf
etcht
hest
aff
.”Il
eadhi
mtomybedr
oom andt
hengobackt
othe
car.

If
indhim hal
fnakedsit
tingont hebed.Mybreat
hhitchesatthesi
ght
.Thenmyeyesgoestohis
l
eftsi
dewher ehi
sbleeding.Iquickl
yplacet
hewhiskeybott
leandaglassont
hepedest
al.Then
gokneeli
nf r
ontofhim withthefir
stai
dkit.
“
Pleasepourmeashotf
ir
st.
”Igetupandpourhi
m hal
fagl
ass.Hedr
inksi
tal
li
nonegul
p.

“
NowI
’
mready
.”Hi
svoi
cei
shoar
se.

If
ir
stcl
eanhi
swound.I
t’
snott
hatdeepbuti
t’
sst
il
lscar
y.

“
Don’
tyout
hinky
ouneedst
it
ches?
”

“
Nah!Pourt
hisoi
ntmentonI
t,
”hepoi
ntsatsomeoi
ntment
.“Thenbandagei
t.
”Her
eleasesa
l
oudgroanwhenIpour
.

“Fuckitburns!”hesayst hr
oughcl enchedt eeth.WhenI ’m done,Ibandagehi m allaroundhi
s
waist.Thenhet akestwopai nt abl
ets.Oncedonet oclearupev eryt
hingIfi
ndhi ml yingagai
nst
theheadboar dwit
hhisey esclosed.Myey est r
aveldownhi sbaretor
so.Admi ringtheeight
packunt i
ltheVl i
nethatleadst oallthewor l
dlytreasures.Iremembert hefeelofhi m agai
nst
myhand.Howsmoot handhar dhewas.Hi slengt handt hegirt
h.Iwonderiflooksasgoodasi t
fel
t.Icanseeabul gef ormingandmyey essnapt ohi stofindhiseyeslookingatmehungr i
ly.
Mywor d!Trustmet olustafteraninjur
edman.It urnbackonmyheel andwal kout .Idon’
teven
reachthedoorbef orehehol dsmet ohimf r
om behi nd.

“Wher
ear ey
our unni
ngoffto?
”hegr owl
s.Heisveryagi
leforaninj
uredman.Icanfeel
theheat
emanati
ngoffhisbody.Thenthest
ressoftheni
ghtcomescr ashi
ngthroughme.Il
eanmy
headbackwardsandrestonhisbar
echest.Tear
sstartf
orminginmyey es.

“
Iwassoscar
edSazi
.I’
m st
il
lter
ri
fi
ed,
”myv
oicei
ssof
tandseduct
ive.

“I
’
m hereforyou,
”hesay
sagainstmyearsendingti
ngl
esallovermybody.Ipushmyass
backwardsandmakecontactwi
thhi
shardbulge.Goshmypant i
esaredr
enched.Heispl
anti
ng
ki
ssesont hesi
deofmyneckandthennibbl
ingmyearlobes.Thi
ssendssensati
onsst
rai
ghtt
o
mywethoney pot
.

“
Sazi
,
”Iwhi
sper
.Mor
eli
keasi
gh.
“
Yesbaby
,”hegr
owl
s.

“
Makemef
orget
,”Iwhi
mper
.

Hehookshisarmsundermyar msandcupsmybreast
s.IswearIgetami
nior
gasm.Heplays
wi
thmynippleswhi
leplant
ingwetkissesont
hesi
deofmyneck.Mywholebodyisqui
ver
ing
wi
thneed.Iputmyhandbet weenusandrubhi
sgr
owingerect
ion.

“
Lina,
”hegr
oansmyname.

“IneedyouSazi .”Hisotherhandgoesdownandcupsmymound.Myhumpi ngincreases.He

tweaksmyni ppleveryhardandmypussyclenchespai
nfull
y.Heturnsmear oundandpushes
meagai nstthewal lt
henhi sl
ipsareonmine.Icant
ast
et hewhiskyanditmakest hekissmor e
eroti
c.Histonguesweepst hroughmymouthandIhungril
yretur
nthekiss.Ourtonguesduel as
ourwarm breat hmingle.

Idigmynai l
sontohisback.Iwantmor e.Theacheatt heapexofmyt highsispersistentandit
i
ntensif
ies.Theinf
ernoisbui
lding.Withonehandcuppi ngmymoundt hr oughmyl eggingshis
otherhandisaroundmyneckasweki ss.Hewedgeshi sonekneebetweenuswhi chal l
owshim
mor eaccesstomyheat edcore.Theideaofhi m choki
ngmesendsmei ntoafrenzy .He
ti
ghtensthepressureagai
nstmyneckandImoanhar deragainsthi
sli
ps.Themor ehet ight
ens
themor eIwant.Thepressur
eagai nstmycl i
tisnotlet
tingup.I’
m soclose.

“
I’
m goi
ngt
ocum Sazi
don'
tst
op.
”Icanbar
elyspeak.Hest
opsandIwantt
ocr
yandshout
.

“
No.No.
No,
”Ihal
fbeg,
hal
fcr
y.

“
I’
vegoty
oubaby
.”Fuck.I
’
vehear
dthi
sbef
ore.Ni
ggay
oudon’
tgotme!

“Don’
tyoudarestop!
”Hepicksmeupandwalkswi
thmetowardsthebed.Ihel
dontohi
mf or
dearl
if
e.I’
m notusedtobei
ngpickedupl
i
keIwei
ghnot
hing.Thatoni
tsownallowshi
mf r
ee
andopenaccesstomypussy .
Thenhegent l
yput smeont hebed.Theni ggai sreall
ystr
ong.Bef oreIknowithei spull
ingmy
l
eggingsof .Thenmyt -
shir
tfollows.I’
m onlyleftwit
hmybr a.Heuncl i
psitandthrowsit
carelessl
ytotheside.I’
ml eftnakedandwi t
hhi m sti
lli
nhisjeans.Hest andsupandunbut ton
asIwat ch.Onebyonehedoesi tt
henpul l
shispant sofft
oget herwithhisboxer
s.Hei supt o
reveal,f
uck!Hiserecti
oninal l
itshardgl or
ypointingupagai nsthisstomach.Ican’t
accommodat eallt
hat.Thenhet akesiti
nhishandandst rokeitacoupl eofti
mesashemov es
towar dsme.Ican’ttakemyey esoffhim.Oncehei sabovemehet ouchesmydr enchedpussy
andgr oans.Ireachforhisdickandst artstr
okinghim.Theheadi sleakingandIuset hatas
l
ubr i
cant.

“Ahh.
..
shit.Fuck...Li
na.”That ’
sal l
hesay sthenhedev our
smymout h.Ipullhi
m downont opof
me, Ican’twait.Idirecthi sl
eakingheadt omyent rancethenletgoandmywombcont racts.I
openmyl egswi deandt henlockt hem aroundhi sass.Hei snotgoinganywher e,nottoday.We
bothswal l
oweachot her’sgroans.Heput shishandsundermyshoul dersandhol dsmet ohim.
Hisheadent ersmeani nch.Goshi tfeel
sgood.Idi gmyheel sonhi sbuttandpushhi mf orwar
d.
Hishardmembergl i
desi nslowlyi ntomywar m wetcanal.Icanfeeleveryinchasmywal ls
opentoaccommodat ehi sgirt
h.Hegl i
desallthewayuntilheisbur i
edtot hehil
t.Iwantto
prai
sehimr i
ghtnow.Hef eelstoogood.I ’
veneverbeenthisf i
l
led.Thesensat i
onisamazi ng.I
canfeelittwit
chi ngandhar deningf urt
her.Bawo!

“
GoshSazi
,Il
ovey
ourdi
ck,
”Isaypul
l
inghi
m cl
oseri
fthat
’sev
enpossi
ble.

“Shit
!”thenhemov es.Iwanttoconfessallmysecrets.Iwantt opledgemypussyj ustforhim.
Histhrustsar esteadyandignit
ingtheinfer
nofrom wi t
hin.Iopenmyey est ofi
ndhisintense
gazeonmi ne.Idon’tknowwhatt odowi thmyself
.Myankl esarefi
rmlylockedaroundhiswai st
.
Ifeeleveryinchashepi st
onsinandoutofme.Icanf eeltheslowbuildofmycl i
max .Idon’t
wanti ttoend.Ineedt oprol
ongt hi
sfeel
ing.Hi
sey esar efil
ledwit
hlust.

“OhLi na,
mysweetLi na.”Thenhepicksupt hepace.Ican’
tprolonganylongerIfeeltheheatas
i
tspr eadsfrom mywombasmyl owerbodycontracts.Hi
sthrustsarelesscoordinatedashe
dril
lsmet omyexpl osi
on.Ili
ter
all
yclamphi sdi
ckwi t
hmyv aginawallsasIcontract.The
pleasureissooint
ensei t’
salmostpainful
.Mycli
maxgoesonf orever
.Hiswholebodyi ssti
ff
abov eminewithhisheadbur i
edont hesideofmyneckasheempt i
eshisloaddeepi nsideme.
Hisar msareshakingashet ri
estohol dhiswei
ght.Thenheflopsont hesidedr
enchedi nsweat
asIam.Wear ebot hbreathi
nghard.It
’sbett
ert
hanIi magi
ned.

“Fuck!I
t’
sbettert
hanIimagined,
”heechoesmyt houghts.Thenheisout.Igetuptopul
lthe
throwsoIcancoverhi
m.Hi swoundisbleedi
ngagain.I
’
m caughtbetweenletti
nghi
mr estand
draggi
nghisasstohospit
al.I
’mtoosat
iatedt
omov e.Icoveroursweatybodiesandcuddlei
nto
hi
m.Hi
sar
m pul
l
smecl
oserev
eni
nhi
ssl
eepandIdr
if
tof
faswel
l
.

I’
m wokenupbyaper si
stentri
nging.Iopenmyey est ofi
ndSazi sti
llpassedout.Myheadf eel
s
sl
ight
lyheavyandmypussyf eelsli
keIhav ebeenthoroughl
yfucked.I tri
ngsagainandit
’smy
phone.Bytheti
meIgett oit
.Ithasstoppedringi
ng.Ichecktofindt hreemissedcall
sfr
om
Monde.It’
salmostmiddayandmyt ummygr umbles.Ifi
rstdeci
det ocal l
auntyandcheckont he
ki
ds.Theyarefi
nejustaski
ngaboutme.OnceIspeakt othem Iexplainthatthey’
l
lbeseeingme
l
aterandtheywil
lal
sobegoi ngonanadv ent
urewi t
haunty.Thatseemst oplacat
ethem.When
donewiththeki
dsIwearmyr obeandgot othekitchentomakef ood.

Whileintheki t
chenIcallMonde.SheisreadytocomehomebutIr eassureherthatther
eisno
need.Theki dsarebackandt heyaresafeandhav ebeenplacedinhidi
ng.Ial
sot el
lhert
hatI’
ll
bebusyt henextf ewdayssoshemustf i
nishwit
hherbusi nesst
ri
p.Onceshei sreassur
edwe
chatunti
l Ifeelhandscomefrom mybackt ount
iemyr obe.OnceitopensIfeelhisonehand
sl
owl ysl
idingdownmyt ummyt owardsmymound.Hi sotherhandcupsandf ondlesmybreast.
Iopenmyl egsslight
lyt
ogivehim accesstomypussy .Asl i
ghtmoanescapesashi smiddle
fi
ngergraz esmycl it
.

“
Arey
ouokay
?”Mondeasks.

“Mhm.I ’
mf ine.Justthatmyheadf eel
sheavy.
”Saziremovesmyr obeoffmyshoul der
sandl et
i
tpool onthef l
oor.WhenhecomesbackIr eal
iseheisalsonakedbehindme.Hi shands
conti
nuewi ththeirexplor
ingwhilehepl
antssmallki
ssesalongmyshoulders.Theideaof
Mondeont helineobliv
ioust owhati
sgoingontur
nsmeon.Acer ti
fi
edhoe,we’veestabl
ished
thi
s.Icanfeel myj ui
cesdr enchi
ngSazi’
sfi
ngerswhil
esomeadr ippingdownmyt highs.

“
Theyhur
tyoudi
dn’
tthey
?”sheasks.Who?I
’
vel
ostmyt
rai
noft
hought
.

“Ja.Theydi
d.”Sazi
isdoingt
hemostrightnow.Hehasmyasspushedbackwar
dswhi
l
eher
uns
hisleaki
ngheadagainstmywetf
olds.

“
That
’swhyIwantt
ocomebackandseef
ormy
sel
fthaty
ouar
eokay
.”

“
I’
m okay
,real
l
y.Ther
eisnoneedf
ory
out
ocome.
”Justaneedf
ormet
ocum.
“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eokay
?Yousoundwei
rd.
”

“YesbabeI
’
mfi
ne,
”Sazi
plungesi
ntomei
noneswi
ftmov
eandhi
sbur
ieddeep.“
Fuuuuuck!
”I
scream.

“
Lona!
”

“
I’
m okay.Hotoilj
ustwenti
ntomyeye.I
’m maki
ngl
unch.Li
stenIhav
etogo.I
’
llspeakt
oyou
l
ater
.”Sazii
sfucki
ngmer ealhar
d.I
t’
sdel
ici
ous.

“Okay
.I’
l
lcheckony
oul
ater
.Hav
esomer
est
.”I
t’
shar
dtocont
rol
mymoans.Hei
sdoi
ngmeso
good.

“Youtoo,
”Ipant.Thenmakesur eIhangup.Icarelessl
ytossthephonet othesi
deandgri
pthe
kit
chencounterasSazi dr
il
lsmypussy.Hespanksmyassr epeat
edlyandIscream mypl
easur
e.
Thatseemstoencour agehimfurt
herashecontinueswiththespanking.Damn.Wherehashe
beenallmyli
fe.Amanwhocanbef i
rm wi
thhishandy etpl
easureyouatt hesameti
me.Myass
i
ssweet l
yburning.Ineedmore.

“
OhSazi
.Di
dIt
ell
youhowmuchIl
ovey
ourdi
ck?
”I’
m pant
ing.

“Il
oveyourpussy.
”I’m onmyt oesandheisrelent
less.Hesnakeshishandaroundtostrum my
cli
twhil
epounding.Ifall
apar timmedi
atel
yasIr eachmyclimax.Hef ol
l
owsrightaftermehis
teet
hdiggi
ngintomyshoul der.Mykneesfeelweek.Wer i
dethewav eofourorgasm unt
ilwe
arebothcal
m.Thenhet urnsmear oundtofacehim.Hecupsmyf aceandgent l
ypl
antsawet
sult
ryki
ssonmymout h.

“
Iwantt
ost
aybur
iedi
nsi
deofy
ou,
”hi
svoi
cei
sthi
ck.Mycl
i
ttwi
tches.

“
Ilov
eyoubur
iedi
nsi
deofme.
”

“
Ihavet
ogo.It
hinkImightneedst
itchesbefor
eyouki
ll
me.Youarenotreal
lygent
lyonan
i
njur
edman.
”Thatbri
ngsmyat t
ent
iont ohi
swound.Thebl
oodspoti
sbiggeronhisbandage.
“
OhmywordIf
orgotabouty
ouri
njur
y.”HegrabsmyhandasIst
artt
ofuss.Mykneesar
est
il
l
t
rembl
i
ngandmybodyishummingwithpleasur
e.

“I
’
m notcomplaini
ng.Ir
eall
yhavetogothough.Myguywi l
lbeoutsi
dewatching.I’
l
lcomeback
l
ateron.Packauntyandtheki
d'
sclot
hesinthemeantime.”Anot
herkissandhei sgone.Iwat
ch
hi
sperfect
lypropor
ti
onedbodystr
utt
ingoutoftheki
tchen.I
’minserioustr
oublenow.

“
Idon'
twannabr
ag,
butI
'
llbe

Thebesty
ouev
erhad

Ihi
tyouwi
tht
hebestst
roke

Fr
eest
yleandt
hebr
east
str
oke

Ti
lyoubl
owaci
gar
ett
esmoke

Andnowt
hebed'
sbr
oke

Sowhatwegon'
donow

Roundt
wonow

Wor
kitout
,thenwecool
down,
cool
down”
-JohnLegend

“Whohaveyoubeenmessi
ngwi
th?
”Bheki
asksme.Sazi
issi
l
ent
lywat
chi
ngmeasi
f
uni
nter
est
ed.

“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhohav
eIbeenmessi
ngwi
th?
”

“Yourbabi
esarehel
dupbyaNi ger
ianmob.Theseguy
sdon’tf
uckar
ound.Theyhaveno
consci
enceandtheywon’
tevenbli
nkaboutki
ll
i
ngachil
d.”Mybodyf
eel
sthechil
ls.Hesay
sit
l
ikeheistal
ki
ngabouttheweather
.

“
Mfet
hu!
”Sazi
war
ns.Icanf
eel
mywhol
ebodyshaki
ngf
rom wi
thi
n.

“
Idon’
tknowanyNi
ger
ians!
”Myv
oicecomesoutasasqueak.Exceptf
ort
hel
adyt
hatdoesmy
weav
es.

“Someonedoes,
”Bheki
isl
ooki
ngatmesuspect
.Sazi
leansbackwi
thhi
sheadf
aci
ngt
he
ceil
i
ng.

“
Yourexmi
ght
.”Whati
sTsi
etsi
int
o?Bheki
looksatSazi
quest
ioni
ngl
y.

“
Ex?
”

“
Maseel
a’
sson,
”Sazi
say
ssof
tl
y.Bheki
’
sey
eswi
deni
nappar
entshock.

“
Howdi
dyougeti
nvol
vedi
nthat
?”Bheki
asks.

“
Iof
fer
edt
opayhergr
ocer
ies,
”hehasanamusedl
ookonhi
sface.

“Fucker
!Youarenotmaki
ngsense.Nowquitpl
ayi
ng.Doyouhav
eanyi
deahowmuchshi
tis
pil
edatyourdoor
step?
”Bheki
isnotamused.Sazi
sobersup.

“RelaxBhekumuzi
andt
ell
uswhaty
ouknow.
”Aboutdamnt
ime.I
'
m expl
odi
ngwi
thanxi
etyov
er
here.

“
Someonehaspokedasl
eepi
ngsnakef
rom i
tsnest
.”Hekeepsqui
etagai
n.

“
Bheki
!”Sazi
prompt
shi
m.

“Fuckenshit
.Mot
herfucker
!Idon’tneedthi
sshit
!”hei
suponhisf
eetandpaci
ng.Sazi
seems
tobelett
inghimvent
.Iwanttojumpi nandquesti
onhi
m butIr
ememberIwastol
dnotto
questi
on.Heswif
tlyt
urnspoint
ingatSazi.

“
I’
m doi
ngfuckal
lforMaseel
a’
soffspri
ng!”Sazi
looksathi
m bl
ankly
.Mycuri
osi
tyispeaked.
WhoisSazir
eall
y?WheredoesTsiet
sifi
tinhisl
if
e?Iremembertheint
err
upt
edconversat
ionat
Budmarsh.Ther
eismor
etot
hismant
hanmeet
stheey
e.Ineedt
ofi
ndoutbutobv
iousl
ynot
toni
ght
.

“Fuckenshit!Lomgodoy i
!Nowayi nhellI
’l
lcrossTayoforhim.Doy ouknowTay o?Thatniggais
crazy.YouthinkI’
m crazy?Hell
!Ihavenothingonthatmotherf
ucker!Hehasconnect i
ons
everywhere.Connecti
onsI ’
dli
ketokeepf ormybusiness.Ther
ear ecert
ainpeopleyoudon’t
stepont hei
rtoesifyouwantt osurvi
veinthisbusi
ness.Tayoisoneoft hem.”Heissti
llpaci
ng.
Justthenasmal lpeti
tehomel yl
ookingwomancomest hroughfrom thepassageti
ghteningher
robe.Themomentshespot sSazishesqueals.

“Sazi
!Ididn’
tknowyouwereher e!
”sheexcl
aimsal
mostr unni
ngtowar
dshim.Hei sonhisf
eet
i
nstantlywit
hasmi l
eonhi
sf ace.Shefl
i
ngshersel
finhi
sar msandhecatcheshertwi
rli
ngher
around.Thenaquickki
ssont heli
ps.Astabofj
eal
ousycut st
hroughmeatthedispl
ay.He
eventuall
ypl
acesheonherfeetbutsti
ll
holdi
ngeachother’
shand.

“
Lookaty
ou.Youst
il
lasbeaut
if
ulasev
er,
”hecompl
ement
s.Shebl
ushes.

“
Stopit.Whydi
dn’ty
ousayyouwerecomi
ng?Icoul
d'
vear
rangedf
ort
heki
dst
obeher
etosee
t
heiruncl
e.”Myhear
tset
tl
esabit
.

“I
twasn'
tpl
annedbabe.I
’
llmaketi
met
ogov i
sitthem.Howar
eyou?
”funnyt
hingBheki
is
obli
vi
oust
othischat
.Heisinhi
sownwor
ldpacing.

“
I’
mfi
ne.Pr
egnantagai
n.”

“
Damn!Howmanyki
dsy
oupl
anonmaki
ng?
”

“
Don’
tbest
upid.Act
uall
ythi
sonewasr
eal
l
yunpl
annedbutabl
essi
ngnonet
hel
ess.
”It
hink
t
heyhav
efor
gottenaboutme.

“Congrat
ulat
ionssi
s.Nowstopi
talr
eady
!”Theybot
hlaugh.I
’
m st
il
lst
uckonsi
s.I
sthi
shi
s
sist
er?Buttherei
snoresembl
ancewhat
soever.
“
Andnowt
hisone?
”Shegest
urest
oBheki
wit
hherhead.

“
Oh!hei
sdebati
ngwit
hhimsel
f.Pr
ocessi
ngsomeinf
ormati
on.I
’m bei
ngrude,l
etmeint
roduce
y
ou.Thi
sisLi
namandl
a,Li
namandl
athisi
smysist
erSanel
i
siwe.AlsoBheki
’swif
e.”

“
Pleasedt
omeety
ou,
Lina,
shesay
sgi
vi
ngmeherhand.Hergr
ipi
sfi
rm.

“
IgobyLona.Pl
easedt
omeety
out
oo.
”Shel
etsgoofmyhand.

“
Yourwi
feknowsshei
sher
e.”Yho!

“
It
’sanunpl
annedv
isi
tSane,
”hesay
s.

“
Don’
tinv
olv
emei
nyourshi
t!
”shesay
s.

“
Iwoul
dnev
er!
”Idet
ectannoy
ancei
nhi
stone.

“
Don’
tst
artnow.Youknowhei
smar
ri
edr
ight
?”Sheaddr
essesme.

“
Yes.Not
hingi
sgoi
ngonbet
weenus.
”I’
mter
ri
fi
edofher
.Shechuckl
esanddi
smi
ssesme.

“
Bhekisi
tdownbeforey
oubor
eahol
einmycar
pet
.”Bheki
immedi
atel
ycomest
osi
tnextt
oher
.
Wearenowallseat
ed.

“Weneedt omov efast.Tonight

,wellthi
smor ni
ng.Theyjusttookthem sotheywon’ tbe
expecti
nganyoner i
ghtaway .Thequickerwedoi tt
hesafertheywillbe.BecauseIcant el
lyou
thi
s,nomat t
erwhatheasksi nexchangeevenifyougivehim, t
heyarenotcomi ngbackal i
ve.
Theniggaisr ut
hlessandlikesmakingst at
ements.
”I’
m aboutt opeemy selfandfeeli
ngdizzy
withfear
.

“
Howdowegett
ohi
m?”Sazi
asks.
“
Iknowaguywhocanl
ocat
ehi
shi
dingspot
.Thenaf
terI
t'
sjustmeandy
ou.
”

“
No.Bheki
.Igoal
one.
”Sazi
cli
ps.

“Youfuckenidiot
.Yout hi
nkI’
dletyouwal kintoali
onsdenbyy oursel
f?Thisisnotaboardroom.
Comesui tup.”Hestandsandmov esthecof f
eetabl
etotheside.Pressesabuttonandthent he
fl
oorsli
desopenr eveali
ngastaircase.“Let
’sgo.”Him andSaziwalkdownt hestai
rs.Iwantto
fol
lowbutSanei ssti
llsit
ti
ngdownwat chi
ngmewi t
hablanklookonherf ace.

“
Whati
sity
ouhav
einv
olv
edmybr
otheri
n?”hert
onei
scol
dandaccusi
ng.

“Iwashi
jackedear
li
erandt
heyt
ookmyki
ds.
”Herf
acesof
tensi
mmedi
atel
y.Shequi
ckl
y
scrambl
estowardsme.

“Youpoort
hing.Ar
eyouokay
?”hert
onet
hreat
enst
obr
eakmybar
elyt
her
ecomposur
e.Ij
ust
nod.

“
Iwantt
hem back,
”Isayf
eel
i
ngt
ear
sbur
nmyey
es.

“They’
ll
bringthem backy
oucancountont
hosetwo.I
’l
lmaket ea.Shegetsupandleav
e.Afew
minuteslatert
hetwocomebackup.Theyhavebul
l
etproofvestson.Bhekii
sst
il
lcocki
nghi
s
gun.IcanseeSazi hashi
stuckedi
nhi
swaist
.Myterr
orint
ensifi
es.

“
I’
m comi
ngwi
th!
”Iexcl
aimt
hemomentt
heyar
eint
her
oom.

“
Nof
uckenway
!”Theybot
hsayi
nuni
son.

“
It
’smyki
ds!
”I’
drat
herdi
ewi
tht
hem t
hanl
i
vewi
thoutt
hem.

“Li
stensweethear
tIai
n’
tgonnagetmyassshotbecauseofyou.Si
tyourassdownandwai
tfor
ustobringyourki
dshome,
”Bhekisay
s.Heisnoti
mpr essed.
“
Excuseus.”Sazi
grabsmyarm andpull
smeoutsi
de.Oncethere,
hehasmeupagai
nstt
hewal
l
wi
thhishandsonthewall
eit
hersideofmyf
ace.Heispissed.

“
Linamandl
a,doy
out
rustme?
”

“
Yes,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Thenall
owmet odot hi
s,al
one.Ican’
thavey
oucapt
uredaswel
l.Ineedtofocuswit
hout
worryi
ngaboutyou.Iwantthem backt
oo.Ipr
omi
seI’
llbr
ingt
hem back.
”Icanbarel
yseehis
eyesinthedar
kast heyscanmyf ace.

“
Okay
.”

“Goodgirl
.”Hepull
smei nhi
sarmsandhol
dsmetight.Ihookmyhandsaroundhi
swai
stand
hughim back.Icanfeel
twogunst
uckedi
n.Myheartstart
spoundi
ng.It
ight
enmyhol
dandhe
pull
smecl oser.

“
I’
m scar
edSazi
,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Wear egoingt
obefine,
”hewhispersagainstmyneck.Thenhepul l
soutandt i
ltmyheadthen
dipshisheadtocapt
uremyl i
psinaquickkiss.Thenhel etsgo.Wegobackt othehouset
of i
nd
BhekiwithSaneagai
nstthewallki
ssi
nghungr i
ly.Theymi ghtaswellbefucki
ng.Sazicl
ear
shis
throat
.Theyevent
ual
lyuntangl
efrom eachother.Theysayt hei
rgoodbyesandt hent
heyare
gone.WhenIcheckthetimeit’
salmost2am.Icanf eel
myheadst arti
ngt oache.

“I
’
llmaket eaagain.TheoneImadei
scol
d.”Ij
ustnodandgositonthecouch.Icheckmy
phone.If
indt womi ssedcal
l
sandamessagefr
om Monde.I
t’
sweird.Shenevercontact
sme
aft
ermid-night.

~Ihadabaddr
eam.Iwasj
ustchecki
ngi
nony
ou.Youar
epr
obabl
ysl
eepi
ng~

Ideci
det
ocal
lher
.Itr
ingst
wiceandshepi
cksup.
“
Babe.
”Shesoundsv
eryawake.

“
Arey
ounotsl
eepi
ng?
”Iask.

“I
’
vebeentossi
ngandtur
ning.Ican’
tsl
eep.Whyar
eyouupatt
hist
ime?
”al
lthet
ear
sI’
vebeen
holdi
ngi
ncomef l
oodi
ng.Ican’
tspeak.

“Lonayouarescar
ingme.What ’
sgoingon?
”I’
mt ry
ingt
ocomposemysel
fbutI
’
mf ai
li
ng.Iwi
sh
shewashereri
ghtnow.Wait
ingwi t
hme.SanecomesbackandwhensheseesI
’m onthe
phoneshepl
acesthecupinfrontofmeandleavesagai
n.“
Lona.
”

“
Iwashi
j
ackedear
li
er.
..
”

“
What
?Ar
eyouokay
?Wher
e?Ohmywor
dLona!Whydi
dn’
tyoucal
lme?
”

“
Ther
eismor
e.”Thesi
l
encei
sdeaf
eni
ng.

“
Whati
tis?
”hert
onei
scal
m.

“
Theyt
ookt
heki
ds.
”Ihearhergasp.

“
No.Noway
.No.
”

“
I’
m sot
err
if
iedMonde.
”

“
WhatcanIdo?
”

“
Wecanonl
ywai
t.Af
ri
endofmi
net
hinkshehasf
oundal
ead.Sot
heyar
efol
l
owi
nguponi
t.
”
“
Lona.Iknowpeopl
ewhocanhel
p.”

“Let
’sgi
vemyguyachanceandsee.Idon’twantt
ojeopar
diset
hei
rchances.
”It
rustSazi
to
bri
ngthem back.Don’
taskmehow.Ij
ustdo.

“I
fnothi
nghappensbymorni
ngletmeknow.I
’
m goi
ngt
otaket
hef
ir
stf
li
ghtout
.IfnotI
’
llseei
fI
can’
torgani
setheRi
char
dsJet.
”

“
Okay.Butdon’
tcancel
yourmeet
ingbabe.Whatar
ey ougoi
ngt
odowheny
ougether
e?Fi
nish
whatyouhavet
oIknowhowi mport
antthosemeet
ingsare.
”

“
Notmor
eimpor
tantt
hany
ou.
”Thatmakesmehappy
.ThenIchast
isemy
sel
f.Toosoon.

“
I’
ll
feel
badwheny
oucancel
.Dowhaty
ouhav
etodo.I
’
llkeepy
oupost
ed.
”

“
Okaybaby
.St
ayst
rong.Youandt
heki
dswi
l
lbei
nmyt
hought
s.Tr
yandgetsomer
est
.”

“
ThankyouMonde.
”Shehangsup.Idr
inkmyt
ea.Nor
estIcanhav
eunt
ilmyki
dsr
etur
n.Sane
r
etur
ns.

“
Yourmanont
hephone,
”shesay
s.I
t’
smor
eli
keast
atementt
hanaquest
ion.

“Yes.
”Icanseet
herel
iefi
nhereyes.“
Doy ouhavepai
nki
ll
ers?Myheadisst
art
ingagai
n.”She
getsupandcomesbackwithtwotabl
ets.Idr
inkt
hem wi
thtea.Wesi
tandwait
.Therei
sn’t
mucht al
ki
nggoi
ngon.I’
mr eal
l
ynotinthemoodforsmallt
alk.

I’
m wokenupbysomecommot i
on.Istr
uggletogetmybeari
ngsinorder.Whenital
lcomes
toget
herIreal
isewhereI’
m atandIjumptogocheck.Igettothedoortofi
ndthetwoguysfrom
l
astnightcarr
yingaunconsci
ousandbl oodi
edBheki.Sanei
samess.Myey esfi
ndSazihe
seemsabi tpale.I
’
mtooscaredtoask.Myey esarescanni
ngtheareaformykids.

“
Sazi
.”Myv
oicecomesoutasawhi
mper
.
“
Comewi
thme.
”Hei
shol
dinghi
ssi
de.Ir
eal
i
sehei
sal
sobl
eedi
ng.

“
Youar
ebl
eedi
ng,
”Ist
ateasIf
oll
owhi
mtot
hecar
.

“Nothi
ngseri
ous.Abul
letgrazedme.
”Heopenst
hebackseatofhi
scarandher
etheyar
e.
Sleepi
ng.Rel
i
efwashesov erme.

“
What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hem?Ar
etheydr
ugged?
”Iwhi
sper
.

“No.Theymustbet i
red.Theywer eter
rifi
edwheretheywere.”HebendsandscoopsKhothat
so
i
nhi sarms.Icanseehei sinpain.Idot hesamewi t
hNthati
si andfol
l
owhimtothehouse.A
paleSaneshowsust oasparebedr oom.Wepl acethem onthebedandtuckthem i
n.Ipl
ant
kissesal
loverthei
rfaces.I
’m sogratefulIcan’
tevenart
icul
ateit.

“Lona.Comewi
thme. ”Il
eav
ethedoorsl
i
ghtl
yopenandf
oll
owSazi
tot
hel
ounge.Adoct
or
goespasstowhatIassumetobethemainbedr
oom.

“
IsBheki
okay
?”

“
Yeshewi
l
lbe.He’
sbeent
hroughwor
se.
”

“
Youar
ehur
ttoo.Letmesee,
”Isaysi
tt
ingnextt
ohi
m.

“I
’
mf ine.Li
sten.Theki
dshavet
ostayhereforat
odayt
henmov
ethem t
oasaf
epl
ace.
”Ishe
crazy
?Apl acetheydon’
tknowaft
ert
heirt
rauma.

“
Why
?Ihav
ewor
ktodo.Ican’
tst
ayher
e.”

“
Notyou.Justtheki
dsandt hei
rnanny.Theguythatki
dnappedthem mi
ghtst
il
lcomeaf ter
t
hem.Wedi dn’
tgethimjusthisgoons.Hei
sgoingtoret
ali
ate.Ri
ghtnowhewon'tsuspectyou.
Hewi
llsuspectTsi
etsiandhisfat
herandgoaft
erthem.Whicharetheonesheshouldbe
deali
ngwit
hinthefi
rstpl
ace.Heknowsyoudon’
tmatterwit
hTsi
etsi
sohewon’
tbotherwi
th
you.Butt
hekidsar
ehi si
nsurancet
olur
eTsi
etsi
in.
”Thisismor
edanger
oust
hanIthought
.

“
Unt
ilwhen?
”Thet
houghtofbei
ngwi
thoutmyki
dsi
ssi
ckeni
ng.

“Unti
lthi
smessi sclear
edout.Wewi llfl
ythem toasafecompoundwheretheywil
lbewith
Bheki’
skids.Theplaceischi
ldfri
endlyandv er
ysecured.Butwecanonl
ygetthem outi
ntwo
days.Isentsomeonet ofet
chyournanny .Youneedtogohomeandpr etendtobethe
dist
raughtmotherwiththepoli
ce.”Thisisgett
ingcomplicat
ed.

“
Idon’
tknowi
fIcandot
his.
”

“
Trustme.
”

“
Okay
.”Hehasasheenofsweatonhi
sfor
ehead.

“
Youneedmedi
cal
att
ent
ion,
”Isay
.

“
Hay
imanj
e.Wehav
etogety
ouhome.
”

“
Rightnow!Can’
tIwai
tfort
heki
dst
owakeup?
”

“Thepoli
cehavetofi
ndyouhomeandwecan’ttakeachanceofusbeingseencomi
ngoutof
here.
”Justthenaunt
yLy
diacomesthr
oughlookingscar
edandconfused.Shei
srel
i
evedt
osee
me.Shet hr
owsherarmsaroundmehuggi
ngme.

“
Yhosi
sibendot
huki
l
e!”sheexcl
aims.

“
Wear
efi
neaunt
y.”

“
Wher
ear
etheki
ds?
”
“
Theyar
eal
sof
inej
ustsl
eepi
ng.
”

“
CanIseet
hem?
”

“
Beforeyougo.Pl
easet
akeaseat.
”Webot
hsi
tdown.Iexpl
aint
oherwhathappenedandal
so
l
etherknowwhatneedstobedone.

“
Don’
twor
rysi
si.Wehav
etodoal
lwecant
okeept
hem saf
e.”

“Iwi
ll
makeaplantobringyourcl
othes.
”Iwalkhertot
hebedroom wher et
hekidsar
esleeping.
Shescoot
snexttothem andcuddl
eswi t
hthem.Iknowthenthattheyareingoodhands.Iwalk
outcl
osi
ngthedoorbehindme.JustthenSanewalksoutoft
heirbedroom.

“
Howi
she?
”Iask.

“He’
l
l befi
ne.Theyremovedthebul
l
et.I
tdi
dn’
thi
tanymaj
oror
gans.Hei
srest
ingnow.
”Ican
seetherel
iefal
loverherf
ace.

“
Thankgoodness.
”Wewal
kbackt
othel
ounget
ofi
ndSazi
onhi
sfeet
.Hedoesn’
tlookgood.

“Wehav
etogo,
”hesays.Igiv
eSaneahugandpr
omisetoseehersoon.Shepr
omi
sest
otake
car
eofmybabi
es.Onceoutsi
deSazi
giv
esmethekeys.

“
Dri
ve.
”Hecl
i
psandopenst
hedoorf
orme.

“
Iwon'
tremembermywayout
.”Ii
mmedi
atel
yfeel
li
keI
’
m bei
ngunnecessar
y.

“
I’
ll
dir
ecty
ou.
”Hei
sst
il
lhol
dingt
ohi
ssi
de.

Igeti
nandst
artt
hecar.Theadrenal
i
nt hatcour
sest
hroughmybodyasitvi
brat
esisamazing.
Hedir
ect
smeuntilweareoutthenIfi
guremywayhome.Her est
shisheadandcloseshi
sey es.
Ipani
cabi
tandputmyf
ingeragai
nsthi
snose.

“
I’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hingbaby
.”

I
t’
sjustaf
ter5am whenwegett omyhouse.Iuseaunt
y’skey
stogeti
n.Ipar
kthecari
nsi
de
t
hegarage.Thensl
ight
lyshakehi
mtowakehi m up.

“
Youneedt
omov
etoy
ournewpl
ace.
”

“
Iwaspl
anni
ngt
omov
etoday
.Mostofmyst
affi
spacked.
”

“
Waitacoupl
eofdaystheny
oucanmov
e.I
’
llhav
easecur
it
ydet
ail
wat
chi
ngy
out
hough.
”We
wal
kthr
oughthehouse.

“
Youwantsomecof
fee?
”Iasksuddenl
yner
vous.

“
Ineedtocl
eant
hiswoundandr
estabi
t.Ther
eisaf
ir
stai
dki
tint
hebootandabot
tl
eof
whi
skey
.”

“Comet
omyr
oom t
henI
’
llf
etcht
hest
aff
.”Il
eadhi
mtomybedr
oom andt
hengobackt
othe
car.

If
indhim hal
fnakedsit
tingont hebed.Mybreat
hhitchesatthesi
ght
.Thenmyeyesgoestohis
l
eftsi
dewher ehi
sbleeding.Iquickl
yplacet
hewhiskeybott
leandaglassont
hepedest
al.Then
gokneeli
nf r
ontofhim withthefir
stai
dkit.

“
Pleasepourmeashotf
ir
st.
”Igetupandpourhi
m hal
fagl
ass.Hedr
inksi
tal
li
nonegul
p.

“
NowI
’
mready
.”Hi
svoi
cei
shoar
se.

If
ir
stcl
eanhi
swound.I
t’
snott
hatdeepbuti
t’
sst
il
lscar
y.
“
Don’
tyout
hinky
ouneedst
it
ches?
”

“
Nah!Pourt
hisoi
ntmentonI
t,
”hepoi
ntsatsomeoi
ntment
.“Thenbandagei
t.
”Her
eleasesa
l
oudgroanwhenIpour
.

“Fuckitburns!”hesayst hr
oughcl enchedt eeth.WhenI ’m done,Ibandagehi m allaroundhi
s
waist.Thenhet akestwopai nt abl
ets.Oncedonet oclearupev eryt
hingIfi
ndhi ml yingagai
nst
theheadboar dwit
hhisey esclosed.Myey est r
aveldownhi sbaretor
so.Admi ringtheeight
packunt i
ltheVl i
nethatleadst oallthewor l
dlytreasures.Iremembert hefeelofhi m agai
nst
myhand.Howsmoot handhar dhewas.Hi slengt handt hegirt
h.Iwonderiflooksasgoodasi t
fel
t.Icanseeabul gef ormingandmyey essnapt ohi stofindhiseyeslookingatmehungr i
ly.
Mywor d!Trustmet olustafteraninjur
edman.It urnbackonmyheel andwal kout .Idon’
teven
reachthedoorbef orehehol dsmet ohimf r
om behi nd.

“Wher
ear ey
our unni
ngoffto?
”hegr owl
s.Heisveryagi
leforaninj
uredman.Icanfeel
theheat
emanati
ngoffhisbody.Thenthest
ressoftheni
ghtcomescr ashi
ngthroughme.Il
eanmy
headbackwardsandrestonhisbar
echest.Tear
sstartf
orminginmyey es.

“
Iwassoscar
edSazi
.I’
m st
il
lter
ri
fi
ed,
”myv
oicei
ssof
tandseduct
ive.

“I
’
m hereforyou,
”hesay
sagainstmyearsendingti
ngl
esallovermybody.Ipushmyass
backwardsandmakecontactwi
thhi
shardbulge.Goshmypant i
esaredr
enched.Heispl
anti
ng
ki
ssesont hesi
deofmyneckandthennibbl
ingmyearlobes.Thi
ssendssensati
onsst
rai
ghtt
o
mywethoney pot
.

“
Sazi
,
”Iwhi
sper
.Mor
eli
keasi
gh.

“
Yesbaby
,”hegr
owl
s.

“
Makemef
orget
,”Iwhi
mper
.

Hehookshisarmsundermyar msandcupsmybreast
s.IswearIgetami
nior
gasm.Heplays
wi
thmynippleswhi
leplant
ingwetkissesont
hesi
deofmyneck.Mywholebodyisqui
ver
ing
wi
thneed.Iputmyhandbet weenusandrubhi
sgr
owingerect
ion.
“
Lina,
”hegr
oansmyname.

“IneedyouSazi .”Hisotherhandgoesdownandcupsmymound.Myhumpi ngincreases.He

tweaksmyni ppleveryhardandmypussyclenchespai
nfull
y.Heturnsmear oundandpushes
meagai nstthewal lt
henhi sl
ipsareonmine.Icant
ast
et hewhiskyanditmakest hekissmor e
eroti
c.Histonguesweepst hroughmymouthandIhungril
yretur
nthekiss.Ourtonguesduel as
ourwarm breat hmingle.

Idigmynai l
sontohisback.Iwantmor e.Theacheatt heapexofmyt highsispersistentandit
i
ntensif
ies.Theinf
ernoisbui
lding.Withonehandcuppi ngmymoundt hr oughmyl eggingshis
otherhandisaroundmyneckasweki ss.Hewedgeshi sonekneebetweenuswhi chal l
owshim
mor eaccesstomyheat edcore.Theideaofhi m choki
ngmesendsmei ntoafrenzy .He
ti
ghtensthepressureagai
nstmyneckandImoanhar deragainsthi
sli
ps.Themor ehet ight
ens
themor eIwant.Thepressur
eagai nstmycl i
tisnotlet
tingup.I’
m soclose.

“
I’
m goi
ngt
ocum Sazi
don'
tst
op.
”Icanbar
elyspeak.Hest
opsandIwantt
ocr
yandshout
.

“
No.No.
No,
”Ihal
fbeg,
hal
fcr
y.

“
I’
vegoty
oubaby
.”Fuck.I
’
vehear
dthi
sbef
ore.Ni
ggay
oudon’
tgotme!

“Don’
tyoudarestop!
”Hepicksmeupandwalkswi
thmetowardsthebed.Ihel
dontohi
mf or
dearl
if
e.I’
m notusedtobei
ngpickedupl
i
keIwei
ghnot
hing.Thatoni
tsownallowshi
mf r
ee
andopenaccesstomypussy .

Thenhegent l
yput smeont hebed.Theni ggai sreall
ystr
ong.Bef oreIknowithei spull
ingmy
l
eggingsof .Thenmyt -
shir
tfollows.I’
m onlyleftwit
hmybr a.Heuncl i
psitandthrowsit
carelessl
ytotheside.I’
ml eftnakedandwi t
hhi m sti
lli
nhisjeans.Hest andsupandunbut ton
asIwat ch.Onebyonehedoesi tt
henpul l
shispant sofft
oget herwithhisboxer
s.Hei supt o
reveal,f
uck!Hiserecti
oninal l
itshardgl or
ypointingupagai nsthisstomach.Ican’t
accommodat eallt
hat.Thenhet akesiti
nhishandandst rokeitacoupl eofti
mesashemov es
towar dsme.Ican’ttakemyey esoffhim.Oncehei sabovemehet ouchesmydr enchedpussy
andgr oans.Ireachforhisdickandst artstr
okinghim.Theheadi sleakingandIuset hatas
l
ubr i
cant.
“Ahh.
..
shit.Fuck...Li
na.”That ’
sal l
hesay sthenhedev our
smymout h.Ipullhi
m downont opof
me, Ican’twait.Idirecthi sl
eakingheadt omyent rancethenletgoandmywombcont racts.I
openmyl egswi deandt henlockt hem aroundhi sass.Hei snotgoinganywher e,nottoday.We
bothswal l
oweachot her’sgroans.Heput shishandsundermyshoul dersandhol dsmet ohim.
Hisheadent ersmeani nch.Goshi tfeel
sgood.Idi gmyheel sonhi sbuttandpushhi mf orwar
d.
Hishardmembergl i
desi nslowlyi ntomywar m wetcanal.Icanfeeleveryinchasmywal ls
opentoaccommodat ehi sgirt
h.Hegl i
desallthewayuntilheisbur i
edtot hehil
t.Iwantto
prai
sehimr i
ghtnow.Hef eelstoogood.I ’
veneverbeenthisf i
l
led.Thesensat i
onisamazi ng.I
canfeelittwit
chi ngandhar deningf urt
her.Bawo!

“
GoshSazi
,Il
ovey
ourdi
ck,
”Isaypul
l
inghi
m cl
oseri
fthat
’sev
enpossi
ble.

“Shit
!”thenhemov es.Iwanttoconfessallmysecrets.Iwantt opledgemypussyj ustforhim.
Histhrustsar esteadyandignit
ingtheinfer
nofrom wi t
hin.Iopenmyey est ofi
ndhisintense
gazeonmi ne.Idon’tknowwhatt odowi thmyself
.Myankl esarefi
rmlylockedaroundhiswai st
.
Ifeeleveryinchashepi st
onsinandoutofme.Icanf eeltheslowbuildofmycl i
max .Idon’t
wanti ttoend.Ineedt oprol
ongt hi
sfeel
ing.Hi
sey esar efil
ledwit
hlust.

“OhLi na,
mysweetLi na.”Thenhepicksupt hepace.Ican’
tprolonganylongerIfeeltheheatas
i
tspr eadsfrom mywombasmyl owerbodycontracts.Hi
sthrustsarelesscoordinatedashe
dril
lsmet omyexpl osi
on.Ili
ter
all
yclamphi sdi
ckwi t
hmyv aginawallsasIcontract.The
pleasureissooint
ensei t’
salmostpainful
.Mycli
maxgoesonf orever
.Hiswholebodyi ssti
ff
abov eminewithhisheadbur i
edont hesideofmyneckasheempt i
eshisloaddeepi nsideme.
Hisar msareshakingashet ri
estohol dhiswei
ght.Thenheflopsont hesidedr
enchedi nsweat
asIam.Wear ebot hbreathi
nghard.It
’sbett
ert
hanIi magi
ned.

“Fuck!I
t’
sbetterthanIi
magined,
”heechoesmyt houghts.Thenheisout.Igetuptopul
lthe
throwsoIcancov erhi
m.Hiswoundisbleedi
ngagain.I
’m caughtbetweenl
etti
nghi
mr estand
draggi
nghisasstohospital
.I’
mtoosati
atedtomove.Icoveroursweatybodiesandcuddlei
nto
him.Hisar
m pullsmeclosereveni
nhissleepandIdri
ftoffaswell.

I’
m wokenupbyaper si
stentri
nging.Iopenmyey est ofi
ndSazi sti
llpassedout.Myheadf eel
s
sl
ight
lyheavyandmypussyf eelsli
keIhav ebeenthoroughl
yfucked.I tri
ngsagainandit
’smy
phone.Bytheti
meIgett oit
.Ithasstoppedringi
ng.Ichecktofindt hreemissedcall
sfr
om
Monde.It’
salmostmiddayandmyt ummygr umbles.Ifi
rstdeci
det ocal l
auntyandcheckont he
ki
ds.Theyarefi
nejustaski
ngaboutme.OnceIspeakt othem Iexplainthatthey’
l
lbeseeingme
l
aterandtheywil
lal
sobegoi ngonanadv ent
urewi t
haunty.Thatseemst oplacat
ethem.When
donewiththeki
dsIwearmyr obeandgot othekitchentomakef ood.
Whileintheki t
chenIcallMonde.SheisreadytocomehomebutIr eassureherthatther
eisno
need.Theki dsarebackandt heyaresafeandhav ebeenplacedinhidi
ng.Ial
sot el
lhert
hatI’
ll
bebusyt henextf ewdayssoshemustf i
nishwit
hherbusi nesst
ri
p.Onceshei sreassur
edwe
chatunti
l Ifeelhandscomefrom mybackt ount
iemyr obe.OnceitopensIfeelhisonehand
sl
owl ysl
idingdownmyt ummyt owardsmymound.Hi sotherhandcupsandf ondlesmybreast.
Iopenmyl egsslight
lyt
ogivehim accesstomypussy .Asl i
ghtmoanescapesashi smiddle
fi
ngergraz esmycl it
.

“
Arey
ouokay
?”Mondeasks.

“Mhm.I ’
mf ine.Justthatmyheadf eel
sheavy.
”Saziremovesmyr obeoffmyshoul der
sandl et
i
tpool onthef l
oor.WhenhecomesbackIr eal
iseheisalsonakedbehindme.Hi shands
conti
nuewi ththeirexplor
ingwhilehepl
antssmallki
ssesalongmyshoulders.Theideaof
Mondeont helineobliv
ioust owhati
sgoingontur
nsmeon.Acer ti
fi
edhoe,we’veestabl
ished
thi
s.Icanfeel myj ui
cesdr enchi
ngSazi’
sfi
ngerswhil
esomeadr ippingdownmyt highs.

“
Theyhur
tyoudi
dn’
tthey
?”sheasks.Who?I
’
vel
ostmyt
rai
noft
hought
.

“Ja.Theydi
d.”Sazi
isdoingt
hemostrightnow.Hehasmyasspushedbackwar
dswhi
l
eher
uns
hisleaki
ngheadagainstmywetf
olds.

“
That
’swhyIwantt
ocomebackandseef
ormy
sel
fthaty
ouar
eokay
.”

“
I’
m okay
,real
l
y.Ther
eisnoneedf
ory
out
ocome.
”Justaneedf
ormet
ocum.

“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eokay
?Yousoundwei
rd.
”

“YesbabeI
’
mfi
ne,
”Sazi
plungesi
ntomei
noneswi
ftmov
eandhi
sbur
ieddeep.“
Fuuuuuck!
”I
scream.

“
Lona!
”
“
I’
m okay.Hotoilj
ustwenti
ntomyeye.I
’m maki
ngl
unch.Li
stenIhav
etogo.I
’
llspeakt
oyou
l
ater
.”Sazii
sfucki
ngmer ealhar
d.I
t’
sdel
ici
ous.

“Okay
.I’
l
lcheckony
oul
ater
.Hav
esomer
est
.”I
t’
shar
dtocont
rol
mymoans.Hei
sdoi
ngmeso
good.

“Youtoo,
”Ipant.Thenmakesur eIhangup.Icarelessl
ytossthephonet othesi
deandgri
pthe
kit
chencounterasSazi dr
il
lsmypussy.Hespanksmyassr epeat
edlyandIscream mypl
easur
e.
Thatseemstoencour agehimfurt
herashecontinueswiththespanking.Damn.Wherehashe
beenallmyli
fe.Amanwhocanbef i
rm wi
thhishandy etpl
easureyouatt hesameti
me.Myass
i
ssweet l
yburning.Ineedmore.

“
OhSazi
.Di
dIt
ell
youhowmuchIl
ovey
ourdi
ck?
”I’
m pant
ing.

“Il
oveyourpussy.
”I’m onmyt oesandheisrelent
less.Hesnakeshishandaroundtostrum my
cli
twhil
epounding.Ifall
apar timmedi
atel
yasIr eachmyclimax.Hef ol
l
owsrightaftermehis
teet
hdiggi
ngintomyshoul der.Mykneesfeelweek.Wer i
dethewav eofourorgasm unt
ilwe
arebothcal
m.Thenhet urnsmear oundtofacehim.Hecupsmyf aceandgent l
ypl
antsawet
sult
ryki
ssonmymout h.

“
Iwantt
ost
aybur
iedi
nsi
deofy
ou,
”hi
svoi
cei
sthi
ck.Mycl
i
ttwi
tches.

“
Ilov
eyoubur
iedi
nsi
deofme.
”

“
Ihavet
ogo.It
hinkImightneedst
itchesbefor
eyouki
ll
me.Youarenotreal
lygent
lyonan
i
njur
edman.
”Thatbri
ngsmyat t
ent
iont ohi
swound.Thebl
oodspoti
sbiggeronhisbandage.

“
OhmywordIf
orgotabouty
ouri
njur
y.”HegrabsmyhandasIst
artt
ofuss.Mykneesar
est
il
l
t
rembl
i
ngandmybodyishummingwithpleasur
e.

“I
’
m notcomplaini
ng.Ir
eall
yhavetogothough.Myguywi l
lbeoutsi
dewatching.I’
l
lcomeback
l
ateron.Packauntyandtheki
d'
sclot
hesinthemeantime.”Anot
herkissandhei sgone.Iwat
ch
hi
sperfect
lypropor
ti
onedbodystr
utt
ingoutoftheki
tchen.I
’minserioustr
oublenow.
Chapt
er14

“
Iwannadoi
tagai
n,doi
tagai
n

Doi
t(Doi
t)

Let
'sdoi
tint
hemor
nin'

Sweetbr
eezei
nthesummert
ime

Feel
i
ngy
oursweetf
ace

Al
ll
aidupnextt
omi
ne

Sweetl
ovei
nthemi
dni
ght

Goodsl
eep,
comemor
nin'
li
ght

Nowor
ri
es'
boutnot
hin'

Justget
ti
n'good,
justget
ti
n'good

Justget
ti
n'goodl
ove”
-TheSt
apl
esi
nger
s.

ThereIsn’
tmucht hatIneedt odoaft
erIeat
.Ihavetowaitf
orSazi
tocomebacksot
hatwecan
taketheclot
hestotheki ds.Theswol
leneggatthebackofmyheadhasgonedownl
eavi
nga
smallscaroffoursti
tches.

Apparentl
yitwon'
tevenshowwheni t
’sheal
ed.Italsodelay
smypl anstoplanttheweave.
I
nsteadIunplai
tmycornr
owsandwashmyhai r
.It’
sstingsabitandhurt
slikeamot her
fucker
whenIblowdr y
.Ihav
eto.Ihadsandandbloodstainsonmyhai r.Pr
obablyshardsofgl
assas
wel
l.

Myhai ri
slongenoughtobet
iedint
oabun.Oncemyhai ri
ssor tedIpackforthekidsandf or
aunty.Hopefull
yshewon’
tmi
ndmegoingthroughherstuffbutIhavenochoi ce.WhenI’m done
withthepackingIdeci
det
oconti
nuewi
thourhousepacking.Ionlyneedclothesforwor kfor
thefoll
owingweekandafewkit
chenut
ensil
sI’
llneedf
orther estoftheweek.Ther estgoes
i
ntoboxes.

It
’stwohour
slaterintomypackingthatIhearadoorbel
lringi
ngwhenIcheckthetimeit’s
almost6pm.Ihav en’
tcookedandI’
m notinthemoodeither.Igodowntocheck.I
t’
sSazi .I
openforhi
m hehasat akeawaybaginonehandandanot herbrownpaperbagontheot her.He
sti
ll
hashissunglasseson.Ist
epasidetolethimin.WhenIdoIgetawhi f
fofhisscentandi t
t
ant
ali
zesmysenses.

“
Hey
.”

“
Hi,
”myv
oicei
sbr
eat
hy.

“
Ugr
and?
”heasks.Mycl
i
ttwi
tches.Hi
svoi
cej
ustdoest
hingst
omysensest
hatIcan’
texpl
ain.

“
I’
m good.
”Hel
ooksatmyhai
r.

“
Ilov
ey ournat
uralhai
r.Youl
ookl
i
keababy.
”Iwanttorol
lmyeyes.I
’
vebeent
oldsomany
t
imesthatmynat ur
all
ookmakesmelooky
ounger.I
t’
sannoy
ing.

“
ThankYou,
”If
akeasmi
l
e.

“
Her
e,”hepassesmet
hesmal
l
erbagt
hent
akesof
fhi
ssungl
asses.Wewal
ktot
heki
tchen.

“
What
’st
his?
”Iaskwhi
l
elooki
ngt
hrought
hebag.

“
Mor
ningaf
terpi
l
ls,
”hesay
sget
ti
ngpl
atesf
rom t
hecupboar
d.

Morningafter!Mywholebodyfreezesandbl ooddrai
nsfrom myf ace.Istandtheremot i
onl
ess
wit
hmyhear tpoundi
ngagainstmychest .Ofallt
hestupidestt
hingsI’m capableofthi
sone
t
akest hecake.STDsandpregnancy !All
foramar ri
eddick!Myear sarebuzzing.Ifeel
dizzyl
ike
I
’m abouttopassout.Whatkindofi r
responsibl
eshiti
sthat?

“
Breat
heLi
na.
”If
eelhi
shandsonmyshoul
derandIlookupt
oseehisconcer
nedface.I
’
m
t
ryi
ngtobr
eat
hebuti
tseemsevenmyl
ungsarerej
ecti
ngmeasthei
rowner.Iwoul
dtoo.

“Lona!Br
eat
hedammi t
!”If
eelhi
mfor
cingmetosi
tonthefl
oorandheshovesmyhead
betweenmyknees.ThenherubsmybackasIt
ryt
oregul
atemybreat
hing.Ev
ent
ual
lymy
hear
tbeatsl
owsdownandI
’m abl
etoi
nhal
eandexhal
eatast
eadypace.Ibr
ingmyheadup.He
si
tsonthefl
oorbesi
deme.

“
Icannotbel
i
eveIwast
hati
rr
esponsi
ble!
”

“Webothwer e,”hesaysgrav
ely
.“I
twouldki
llmywifeifIweretohavesomeonepr egnant.
”A
shar
ppaincut sacrossmywombatt hatst
atement.Ofcoursehisonlyconcernwouldbehis
marri
age.Her unshishandsthr
oughhi
shair.“
Thatwasi nsensi
ti
ve.I
t’
sjustthatI
’
m also
fr
eaki
ngout.”Igetthepaperbagandtakeoutthet
ablets.

“Thi
smightpr
eventt
heunwantedpr
egnancybutt
her
ear
eSTDsy
ouknow.
”Het
akesouthi
s
phoneopensi
tandpassesi
ttome.

“
Here.Thesear
emyresul
tsfr
om l
astweek.Mywif
eandIgettest
edtwiceayear
.It’
sbeenour
r
outi
nesincewemet.
”Thementi
onofthewifef
eel
sli
keaslapontheface.Il
ookthrought
he
r
esul
tsandtheyar
enegat
ive.

“
Ihaven’tbeenint
imatewit
hany
oneinalmostt
hreeyears,
”doesMondecount?Iqui
ckl
ysquash
t
hatthought.“Iwastest
edatl
eastt
hreeti
mesafterIdi
vorcedbecauseIwant
edtomakesureI
wascleanandIwas.”

“
Thenwearegood.Justneedtot
akethepi
llt
omakesurenot
hinghappens.
”Igetupt
oget
wat
eranddr
inkt
hepill
.Healsogetsupandcomesbehi
ndmeholdingmet ohi
m.

“
How’
syourhead?
”heasks.

“I
t’
snotaspai
nful
.ItwaswhenIwashedmyhai
rthough.
”Hegent
lyt
urnsmear
oundt
oface
hi
m.

“
I’
vemi
ssedy
ou.
”Myhear
tlur
ches.Wi
tht
hesoundofhi
svoi
ceI
'
dbel
i
eveany
thi
nghesay
s.

“
I’
vemissedyou,
”Iwhi
sper.Hi
sknuckl
esgr azemycheekthencaressesmewit
hhisthumb.I
’
m
l
ooki
ngintohi
seyesastheychanget
heircolourandbecomedarker.Hemov
escloserasmy
armsaut omati
cal
lygoesaroundhiswaist.Hi
sthumbcomest omyl i
pandsli
ghtl
yopenmy
bottom one.Mymout hissl
ightl
yopenedandheinsertshisthumbinsi
deandIsuckit.Hiseyes
darkenfurt
her.Hi
slipsaresli
ghtl
yopenedaswell.Ist
artsuckinghi
stonguesuggesti
vel
y,he
groansandbiteshislowerl
ip.Heissofuckensexy.Hetakesouthisthumbandr epl
acesitwit
h
hi
smout h.

Ashemov escl
osertomeIcanf eelhi
shardbul
geagai
nstmytummy .Ourt
onguesduel
hungri
l
yasourbreat
hmi ngl
e.Iwantmore.Theneedi
srei
gni
ted.Hecupsmyfaceandangl
eit
sothathecanhavebet
teraccess.

“
Mmhhhh,
”amoanescapesmymout
h.Mypussyi
spul
sat
ing.Thenhepul
l
sback.Hi
sbr
eat
hing
i
sunev
ensoi
smine.

“Let
’seatI
’
m starv
ing,”hegr
owl
s.Ijustnod.I’
m batt
li
ngtogetmy sel
ftoget
her.Heturnsaround
andgoestodishupf orbot
hofus.Ineedagl assofwinetosett
lemysenses.Iopenabot tl
e
andpourtwoglasses.Wegoandsitont hetablewit
houtplat
esandwi negl
asses.Icanfeelthat
I’
m wetasIsi
tdown.

“
Whenar
ewegoi
ngt
otheki
ds?
”Iask.

“
Aft
erwef
ini
sheat
ing.
”

“
Howi
syourwound?
”Ial
mostf
orgotabouti
t.

“
Igotaf
ewst
it
chesbuti
t’
sfi
ne.
”Hal
fwayt
hroughourmeal
mycur
iosi
tyget
sthebet
terofme.

“Don’
tyoufeel
gui
l
tyf
orcheat
ingony
ourwi
fe?ImeanIdoandIdon'
tev
enknowher
.”Heput
s
hiscut
ler
ydownandl
eansbackonhi
schai
rheav
ingasi
gh.

“
Ido.
”Hef
lat
lyst
ates.

“
Thenwhyar
eyoudoi
ngi
t?”
“It
’saquestionIaskmy selfallt
hetime.Whyam Idr awnt oyoubeyondallreasoning?IthoughtI
couldfightt
hispullbutIfail
ed.Nowt hatI’
vetast
edy ouIwantmor e.That
’sallIcouldthi
nkof
thisaft
ernoon.Beingburiedinsi
deofy ou.Thewayy ourpussyholdsmycockandmi l
ksme.The
war mthandt hegri
pIfeltthi
smor ninglef
tmehar dev er
ytimeIthoughtaboutit.
”Gosh!Iwas
drenched.Istart
edpantingwhi l
elookingathi
m.

“
Sazi
,
”Ibr
eat
heout
.

“Doy ouwantt oseewhaty oudome? ”hisvoicehasdr oppedanoct ave.It

’ssendsshiversdown
myspi ne.Ijustnodmyhead.Thenheunbut t
onshi sjeansslowl yl
ookingatme.Oncedonehe
pull
st hem offjustenoughf ormet oseehishar dmember .I’
m hookedoni t
.Ican’tt
akemyey es
offit
.Itgetshar derasIwat chhim.Hewr apshishandar ounditandst ar
tsslowl
yst r
okingit
.My
eyesf ol
lowt hemov ementwhil
emypussycl enchesr epeatedly
.Iwantt obetheonet ofeelt
he
ri
dgesandt hesmoot hnessofhisharddick.Iwantt obet heonet osmeart hepre-
cum Isee
aroundi t
’sheadanddowni tsl
onglength.Icanf eelt
hatI’m goingtoleaveaspotont hechair.I
t
doesn’thelpt hattherearenopantiesundermydr ess.

Her
elaxeshi
sst
anceonthechai
rashest
eadi
l
yst
rokeshi
msel
f.I
’
mroot
edt
othespot
.Ican’
t
mov
eandIcanbarel
ybreat
h.

“
Doyouli
kewhatyouseeLi
namandl
a?”Ijustnodmyhead.“
Excuseme!What’
sthat
?”hist
one
i
sst
ernandmorecommanding.Myeyessnaptohisf
acetofi
ndhisl
ustf
il
ledgazef
ixedonme.

“
Yes,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“
Isy
ourpussywet
?”FuckIbecomewet
ter
!Inodmyhead.Her
aiseshi
sey
ebr
ow.

“
Yes,
”Icanhar
dlyhearwhatI
’
m say
ing.

“Comesitonme, ”hecommands.Iscr ambletomyf eetandqui ckl

ygot ohi
m.Ist r
addlehim
whil
eItakehimt omyhandandgui di
nghimintomyent rance.Ifeelev
erypartofhim asIgli
de
downunt i
lI’
mf ullyseated.Webot hgroanasIgetami ni or
gasm.Hi shandsaregentleplaced
onthesidesofmywai st.Irestmyheadagainsthi
sforeheadt ocomposemy sel
f.Hetil
tshis
headandcapt uremyl ipsi nhis.I
’
m scaredt
omov e.I’
m ont heedgeandIdon’ twantthefeeli
ng
toendyet.Theki ssintensifi
esandmyhi psgyrat
eabi t
.Webot hgroanatthemov ement.Fuck!
I’
m almosti
nt ears.Thepleasur
eistoomuch.Hishandsarenowgr opi
ngmyassundert he
dress.Youcan’tseeany t
hingbutmydresscov
er i
nghisgr
oinarea.Underneat
hit’
saninf
erno.I
startmovi
ngatast eadypacewithmyhandsbalancedonhisshoulder
s.Iam fi
ll
edtocapaci
ty.
Ourgazelock.

“Jeses.Linat heheati
ny ourpussyismaddeni ng.”Hehasawi ldlookonhi sface.Ican’teven
tal
kIj ustmoanmyconsent .Hesl
ightl
yspreadshi slegsandmypubi cbonei sflushedagainst
hisincreasingthefri
cti
on.Thenhest art
sthrusting.Imeethisthrustswi t
hmi neasIbounceon
hisdick.Ithrowmyheadbackandf uckhimi near nest
.Hishandsl eavemyassandgot omy
chest.Thenhesuddenl yt earsmydresstorev ealmyboobs.Hel at chesont hem.Ipr aythatt
he
chaircansur viveourweightasIbounceonhi m.Hepushesmybr eaststogetherashef eastson
myni pples.Iwonderifonecangomadwi t
hpl easur ebutIf
eelli
keI ’
ml osingmind.

“
Sazi
!Iwanti
thard!
”Ido.Iwanthimtopunishmewi
thhi
sdi
ck.Hehasmebentov
ert
het
abl
e
wi
thmylegswideopenandassf ul
lyexposedt
ohi
minaspl
itsecond.

“Wouldyoulookatthat
?Yourpussywetforme.YouaresuchashoeLina!Youaredri
ppi
ng
wentformydick.Lookatall
thepussyj
uicesf
lowi
ngdowny ourthi
ghs.
”ThenIfeel
ahard
spank.Thenhishandsgropi
ngmyass.IswearIcl
imaxalit
tl
e.Iburymyheadonmyhead.Thi
s
i
stortur
e.

Hei
sonhi
skneesbehi
ndmebecauseIcanf
eel
hisbr
eat
honmyass.

“Aren’ty
ouahornybi
tch?”Iwanttohowlmyy esforthewholeneighbourhoodtohear
!It
urnmy
headt ot
hesideandwatchhim onhi
skneeswi t
hhisjeanshalfway,hi
shandonhi sdi
ck,
str
okinghimsel
fasheworshipsmybehind.That’
sthewordI’duse,worship.Thel
ookhehason
hi
sf acemakesmyjui
cesf l
ow.

“YesIam!”hetakessmal
lbit
esofmyasswhil
ehisf
ingerstravel
upanddownmywetsl
i
t.Then
Ifeel
hiswettongueagai
nstmypucker
edhol
e.Il
oseallsenses.

“Sazi
!Sazi.
..
babe..
.Sazi
..
.Sazi
..
.ohGod!”I
’
m arambl
ingmess.Hereall
yeatsmyasswhilehi
s
fi
ngersplaywit
hmydr i
ppingslit
.Thenheal
ter
nat
eswit
hthespanking.“
Oh!Sazi
!”Thi
sis
beyondpleasure.
“
Tel
lmewhaty
ouwantLi
na!
”Ican’
trecogni
sehi
svoi
ce.Hei
sinmuchneedj
ustasIam.

“IwantyouMt ungwa.
”Hegrowlsbehindmeandhequi ckl
ygetsupandr ubshisheadonmyslit
.
I
’m abouttopassout.Thenheinser
tshimselfsl
owl yaswebothgroanandhest art
sthr
usti
ng.
Witheverythr
ustthetabl
emovesasmybodyl urchesIdon’
tcare.Gl
assesfall
overandbeak.
I
t’samess.Thehousecancol l
apseforallIcar
e.AllIcar
eaboutisthepleasur
eofhim
poundingme.Bot hhi
shandsarekneadingmygl obes.

“Fucky ouhaveaf i
neass! ”histhumbgrazesmybut tholeandmybodyconv ul
ses.Thet abl
e
mov esunt i
li
tsagainstthewal l
.Hehasn’tstoppedhispounding.ThenIfeelhi
swetf i
nger
circl
ingmybut thol
e.Myl egsar eshaki
ng.Hedoest hisrepeatedl
yashekeepsl ubri
cati
nghis
fi
nger .Thefor
eignintr
usi ononmyassandt hesteadypoundingofhisdick,
isescalati
ngmy
pleasuretoanotherlevel.If eel
hisfi
ngertentat
ivel
yentermyassandIt enseabi t
.Hesl owshi
s
thrustsandbendscl osert omyear .

“Rel
axbabe.Iwon'
thurtyou,hesaysinhisdeepv oi
ce.Ibr
eaki
ntogoosebumpsal lovermy
body.Thenhepl
antswetkissesalongsi
demyneckt henonmyshoulders.OnceI
’mr el
axedhe
goestomyassagain.Ifeelhi
swetf i
ngerslowlygoi
nginandmyr ect
alopeningr
elaxesto
accommodatehim.Oncehei sinsi
dehisfingermovesinsyncwi
thhisthrust
s.If
eelasecond
fi
ngergoinashispaceincr
eases.

“
Fuck!Yeah!Justl
i
ket hatbaby.
..
youf
eel
sogood.Il
ovet
hef
eel
ofy
oui
nsi
deofme.Goddamn!
Har
derbaby.That’
sit
,”Ipant.

Icanf eel
myt highsbr ui
singIdon’
tcar e.Thedoublepenet r
ationhasputmeonanot herlevel
.
Myor gasm issoclose.Icanfeelmyt oescur l
ast hesensationstr
av el
upmyl egstomyl ower
backandal ongmyspi ne.Mywhol ebodyt ensesasIexpl odeintothebiggestor
gasm yet.He
hashisarm aroundmynecki nachokehol dpositi
onandIcl ingtohisarm asIri
dethewav eof
ourorgasm.Hi swholebodyi sti
ght.Onlyhisdicktwit
chinginsideofme.Mywai sti
sbent
upwardsashi sbodycur l
edintomine.Wear elockedinat i
ghtembr aceunti
lwecomedownt o
eart
h.

Heloosenshisgr
iparoundmyneckandstandsupri
ghtpul l
ingmewi th.Mybackrel
axes
agai
nsthishardt
orsoaswebotht r
ytocat
chourbreath.Icansti
l
lfeel hi
minsi
detwit
chi
ng
whil
eIfeelempti
nesswherehi
sfinger
shavebeen.ForonceImi ghtjustdoanal
.ThenItense
whenIthinkofhi
sgir
th.Maybenot.
“
Arey
ouokay
?”heasksnuzzl
i
ngmysweat
yneck.

“
I’
m mor
ethanokay
.”Myhandsar
ecar
essi
nghi
sst
rongt
highs.

“Becarefuloft
hebrokengl ass,”hesay
sagai
nstmyear.Hishandsarecuppi
ngmybr
eastsand
play
ingwi t
hmynipples.Ileant othesi
degi
vi
nghim bet
teraccesst
omyneckashenibbl
eson
i
t.Ifeelhi
m growi
ngagai ninsideofme.

“
Sazi
!Youar
einsat
iabl
e!”Isay
.

“Ihavebeenl
usti
ngaft
eryouforawhilebaby.Rememberallthoseclosecal
ls.Theni
ght
sI
couldn’
tsl
eepthi
nki
ngaboutyou.Imagini
nghowy ou’
dfeelagainstdi
ck.”Hi
sdirt
ytal
kwil
ldr
ive
met omadness.Myarousal
isrenewed.Hestart
stogentl
ythrust.

“Oh.I’
m notstoppi
ngyou.Takeme,
I'
m atyourmer
cy.
”Hepul
l
soutandImoant
hel
ossofhi
s
hardness.If
eelempty
.Iwhimpermyprotest
.

“Shhhhmyki tt
en,”hehushesme.Thent urnsmear oundandpushesmeagai nstt hewall.The
factthatwear est i
llf
ull
ydr essedissuchat urnon.Thenhecagesmei ndipshi sheadand
devourmyl ips.Wi thonequi ckmov ehepi cksmeupandent ersmei nonehar dt hrust
.Fuck!I
grabhi sshoul derforbalance.Hedoesnot hingbutfuckme.Har d.Icanfeelhisf i
ngersdigging
i
ntomyt hi
ghswhi l
emybacki sr
epeat edlybangi ngonthehardwal l
.I’
m goingtof eeli
tlateron
butnowI ’m urginghim on.Wear ebothdr enchedinsweat.Mycl i
maxcomesunexpect edlyasI
l
ockmyankl esar oundhi sass.Her eacheshi scli
maxmaki nganimalist
icsoundsagai nstmy
neck.Af ewsecondsl aterheletsmyl egssl i
deintothefl
oor.HisdickpulloutofmeandIf eel
ourmi xedjuicesflowingdownmyi nnert highs.

I
’
m onmyshakyl
egsandI
’
m notsur
eifIcanhol
dmy
sel
fupf
orl
ong.

“
Beaut
if
ul,
”hewhi
sper
swi
thhi
sey
esscanni
ngmyf
ace.Ipl
acemyhandsonhi
scov
eredchest
.

“Let
’sgoshower
,”Isay
.
Henodshisheadandt akeshispant soffwithhissneakerscarefulnott osteponthegl ass.
Thenhetakesmyhandandl eadsmet omybedr oom.Ifollowhim ogl i
nghisper f
ectass.Once
i
nmyr oom west r
ipnakedandgoundert heshowerwher ehepr oceedst oscrubeveryinchof
me.Bythetimehei sdoneI ’
m aqui veri
ngarousedmesswi thhisheadbur i
edinmypussy
muffi
ngmef ordearlif
e.OnceIr eachmycl i
maxIr eci
procatebyt akinghimi nmymout h.Isuck
hi
m withmyey eslockedonhi s.Ican’ttearmygazeaway .Thefeel ofhisharddickinsidemy
mouthispurebli
ss.Seeinghowwor keduphei sincr
easesmypl easur e.Icanseehei scl ose.
Hehasav eint
hatpopsoutonhi sf oreheadwhenhei saboutt oclimax .Isl
owmymov ement
andhehisses.

“Don’
ttease,
”hegrowl
s.Ipl
acethef
latofmyt
onguebeneat
hhi
sengor
gedheadwhi
l
est
roki
ng
him.Hissli
tisl
eaki
ngprof
usel
y.

“Iwantyoutocum insi
demymout h,
”Ipurr
.Hishipsst
artjer
king.ThenItrytoswallowall
of
him whi
leIgentl
ycuphisball
s.Hethr
owshi sheadupwardsandhol dsmyheadt ightashishi
ps
thr
ustagainstmythroat
.Igag.Hewon’tl
etgo.Heisbeyondcont r
ol asheemptieshimselfi
n
myt hr
oat.Tear
scomeoutf rom t
hecorner
sofmyey esasItrytobr eatht
hroughmynose.

Event
ual
lyhepull
soutst
aggeri
ng.Whi
l
eIcoughuncont
rol
labl
etr
yingtobl
ockever
ythi
ngfrom
comingback.Hegent
lyt
ouchesmyheadIassumehiswayofapol
ogisi
ng.Hi
schestisheavi
ng.

“
FuckLina!Thatwashot.I
’m sorryIcoul
dn’tpul
lout
.”Hegivesmehi shandandpul lsmetomy
f
eet.Istandonmyshakylegslickingmylips.I
’v
eneverswall
owedbef ore.Wellt
hereisafi
rst
f
orev er
ythi
ng.Hesmasheshisl i
psonmi neandmyar ousalbui
ldson.Kant i
isheplanni
ngon
f
uckingmet heent
ir
enight?Myi nnerhoejumpsatthethought.Hereluctant
lypul
lsback.

“
Weneedt ogot
oBheki
’
s,”hesay
scar
essi
ngmyf
acewi
thhi
sthumbwhi
l
ethewar
m wat
erhi
ts
myback.

“Thebagsarealr
eadypacked.
”Wequi ckl
yri
nseandgetdr
essed.Whil
eI’
m st
il
lget
ti
ngr
eadyhe
goestoclearupthebr
okenglasses.Mywholebodyi
sdeli
ciousl
ysor
e.Mypussycanst
il
lfeel
theimpri
ntsofhi
m.

Themomentwegett
ohi
scarIf
all
sleep.Heonl
ywakesmeoutwhenwear
eout
sideBheki
’
s
house.
“
Wearehere,
”hesay swit
hhisf
aceclosetomi ne.Il
eanupwardsandgivehim aqui
ckpeckon
t
hel
ips.Hedoesn’
tletgoanddeepensthekiss.I
’m addi
ctedt
ohisli
ps.Heletsgoandcomes
t
oopenforme.Themomentwegeti nthehousemybabi escomecrashi
ngtome.

Wearesitt
ingi
nt heloungethethreeofus.I’
m expl
ainingasbestasIcoul
dwhyt heyar
egoing
away.Ial
l
aytheirfearsofneverseei
ngmeagai nbyr eassuringt
hem t
hatI
’
llcal
lever
ydayand
vi
sitt
hem.Sazicomesi nandaddst hattheycouldr
idehor sesandpl
aywit
hdogswher ether
e
ar
egoing.Thatseemst oexcitethem more.

I
tisallmostmi dni
ghtwhent heygot ot
heair
stri
ptotakeapriv
atej
et.If
eeldownaft
erseeing
them off.I
’v
eneverbeensepar at
edfrom mykidsexceptt
hefew weekendswit
hthei
rfather.I
haven’theardf
rom hi
m.I’
dliket ochewhisearoffbutImustbeobl
ivi
oustotheki
dsreturn.

Sazi
dri
vesmebackhomeinsi
lence.Heonl
yhasmyhandi nhi
stheent
ir
etrip.Onceweget
homehetakesmetobedandIfal
lint
oadeepsl
eep.Ionl
ywakeupthefoll
owingdaytofi
nd
hi
m gone.

I
t’
snowMondayandMondeiscomingbacklatertoday.We’
vebeenchatt
ingonthephoneas
muchaswecoul
d.Sazi
kindofknewthatIwasstil
lseeingmywomanf r
om thecal
lsIt
ookand
di
dn’
tsaymuchonl
ywhenfucki
ngthenhewoul dclai
m mypussy.

Ispendthewholedayfloati
nginandoutofmydaydr
eams.Fi
siwehasgi
venupt
ryi
ngto
engagemei nanyconversati
on.Af
terwor
kIimmedi
atel
ygohometosoakmysoremuscl
es.I
am alsoexpect
ingMondet ocomepickmeuponherwayfrom t
heair
por
t.

Thedinneri
sar
elaxedaf
fai
ronlyt
hatMondehast
ogohome.Idon’
tquest
iont
hatasmybody
real
l
yneedsabr
eakf r
om al
ltheor
gasms.

Wespendthefol
lowingweekcatchi
nguponworksot her
eisn’
tmuchper
sonal
timet
oget
her
.
Ev
enwithSazi
,Ionlyrecei
veshor
tcall
sandmessages.

Ihavemanagedtomoveoutoft
hehousedur
ingtheweek.Ij
ustneedt
obuyasf
ewt
hingst
o
makethenewplacemor
eli
keahome.Ilov
eit
.It
’speacef
ulint
here.

It
’saFr
idayandSazii
sawayonbusi ness.Ihavemadepl answithMondeandsheaskedmet o
spendt
henightatherpl
ace.I
’
m excitedtofinal
lyseeherpersonalspace.Iwonderi
fitwil
lshow
abitmorechar
actert
hanheroff
ice.Justont i
meshecal l
smet oletmeknowshei sbythegate.
Igi
veherasecur
it
ycodet
ousef
orent
ry.It
akemyov
erni
ghtbagandgomeetheri
nthepar
king.

“
Hey
.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul,
”shepecksmyl
i
psandst
art
sthecar
.

“Thankyou.Yout
oo,
”Isay
.Shei
sonl
ydr
essedi
njeansandasl
i
mfi
tt
ingt
-shi
rtbutshei
s
gorgeous.

“
Ther
eissomet
hingIneedt
otel
lyou,
”shesay
s.

“
Itsoundsser
ious.
”

“
Iti
s.Ij
usthopei
twon’
tchanget
hingsbet
weenus.Wewi
l
ltal
kabouti
twhenweget

home.
”

Mycur
iosi
tyi
speaked.

(I
’m goingtopauset hi
sst oryindef
ini
tely
.Iapol
ogisef
ortheinconveni
ence.No,I
’
m notturni
ng
i
ntoabook.I twill
becompl et
edhereont hepage.Idon’
twanttogi v
eat i
mef r
ameasI ’
l
lbe
pl
aci
ngmy selfunderpressure.Thanky oufort
heloveandsupport.I
’l
lbebacksoon.Thankyou
i
nadv ancef oryourunderstanding)

Chapt
er15

“
Thesewat
erscangetal
i
ttl
ebusy

ButIgotex
per
ience

Don'
tmi
ndt
rekki
ngt
hrought
hest
orm

LongasIknowt
haty
ou'
reher
ewi
thmebaby

Sheddi
ngal
lyouri
nnocence

Iseet
hewal
l
sar
elooki
ngl
i
ket
heymi
ghtpr
eci
pit
ate

Unt
ilI
'
minsodeep,
it'
supt
omyway
s

ButIpr
omi
segi
rlIai
n'
taf
rai
d
I
t'
srai
ningi
nsi
dey
ourbed

Nopar
tsar
edr
y

Lov
ingmadey
ousowet
,yourl
egs,
yourt
highs

Andev
ersi
ncewef
ir
stmetIknewt
hat

I
,IknewIwasr
eadybabyt
otaket
hatdi
ve”
-Usherbaby

Wedriveinsilenceunti
lwegettoherarea.Thenwedr ivi
ngt hr
oughast unninglybeauti
fulgated
count
ryestate.Thisiswheret
herichstay.Noscratchthat,wealt
hy.It
’shardt obeli
evethatone
canfi
ndsuchat ranqui
lpl
aceevenwithintheper
ipheralofthebustli
ngcity
.Shemustr eall
y
comef rom aweal thyf
amil
y.Imeanev enwithhersalaryIdon’tseeheraffordingsuchapl ace
onherown.

Wedr i
vethrought
hewindingroadint
oastandal
onehouse.I
t’
samassi
vepieceoflandt
hati
t’
s
l
ocatedin.Shepar
ksontheequallymassi
vedri
veway.The7seri
esf
rom t
heotherdayis
par
kedt her
eamongstothercars.

“
Wear
eher
e,”shesay
s.Ipi
ckupmyj
awf
rom t
hef
loorandsnapmymout
hshut
.

“
Ist
hisy
ourhouse?
”Iexcl
aim.

“
Yes.
”That
’sal
lshesay
s.

“
Doy
oul
i
veal
oneher
e?”Thi
scoul
dhouseatl
eastt
enpeopl
e.

“Notexact
ly.
”Sheisbeingcrypt
icall
ofasuddenandI’
m confusedasfuck.If
oll
owasshe
stepsoutofthecar
.Sheopenst hebootandgetsmyoverni
ghtbagthenIfoll
owheri
ntot
he
house.Myeyesarealloveradmiri
ngthebeaut
yandthegrandeuroft
heplace.

Thefrontdooropensint
oabeauti
fuldecor
atedentryarea.Ther
earewindingstairsdownthe
passagewhichI’
m assumingl
eadtothebedrooms.Wi deopendoorsonei thersi
deoft he
entr
ancearea.Sheputsmybagbyt hecoathangerandmov est
owardstheent r
anceont helef
t.
Icanseeahugeki t
chenanddini
ngintheri
ght.Ifol
l
owheri ntoanequall
ybeaut i
full
ivi
ngarea.

“
Any
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”sheasks.I
’
m suddenl
ypat
ched.Ibel
i
eveI
’
minwayov
ermyhead.
“
Yesagl
assofr
edwi
nepl
ease.
”Shewal
kst
owar
dsabarar
eaont
heot
hersi
de.

“
Takeaseat
,”shesay
s.

Iwalktentat
ivel
ytowar
dsthecomf
ortablel
ooki
ngcouches.I
ssuei
sthattheyar
eof
fwhi
teand
theyseem li
kenooneusesthem.I
’
mr el
uct
anttoevensi
tonthem.Shecomestomewit
htwo
glassesofwineandgivesmemyglass.Thenshetakesaseat
.

“Si
tLonaIdon'
tbit
e.”Shepat
sthespacenextt
oher
.Iper
chmyassont
heedge.“Whyar
eyou
soupt
ight
?Relax
.”

Ideci
det
osi
tbackandIsi
nki
ntot
hel
uxur
iousheav
ent
hati
sthesecouchest
hent
akeasi
pof
mywine.

“
Whatisitt
hatyouwant
edtot
ell
me?
”Iaskaf
ewsecondsl
ater
.Sheheav
esahugesi
ghand
l
ookssl
ight
lyuncomf
ort
abl
e.

“
Ihavetostar
tfr
om thebegi
nni
ngf
oryout
ounder
stand.
”Justt
henmyphoner
ings.Iexcuse
mysel
ftoanswer.Sheget
supandwal
ksawaygi
vi
ngmepr i
vacy.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“
Linamandl
a.”Thatdeepv
oicedr
ivesmysensesi
ntoaf
renzy
.

“
Hey
.”Il
ookar
oundt
oseei
fMondei
sn’
tcl
oseby
.

“
Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m goodandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m good.Li
stenIcamebackunexpect
edl
y.AnychanceIcant
akey
ououtf
ordi
nner
?”heasks.

“
Unf
ort
unat
elyImadepl
ans.
”

“
Oh.
”Hesoundsdi
sappoi
nted.“
Anot
hert
imet
hen.
”

“
Sur
e.”Ther
eissi
l
ence.

“
Okay
.Letmenotkeepy
ou.
”

“
Sazi
!”Iqui
ckl
ycal
lout
.

“
I.
..
I.
..may
bet
omor
row?
”Whatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
thme?

“Looki
ngforwar
dtoit.Goodnight
.”Hehangsupbefor
eIsayanythi
ng.Justt
henMondewal ks
backwithaplat
ter
.Sheplacesitonthecoff
eetabl
e.I
t’
sacheeseplatt
erwit
hcr acker
sand
somef r
uit
.Shegoesandbr i
ngsthewholebott
leofwi
neandplacesitonthetableaswell
.

“
Ithoughtwecoul
dsnackwi
tht
hisbef
oredi
nner
.”Shet
akesaseatnextt
ome.If
eel
but
ter
fl
ies
i
nmyt ummy .

“Thi
slooksdel
i
cious,”Isaypi
ckingupapieceofcheeseandpoppi
ngi ti
ntomymout h.
Deli
ci
ous.Shei
swat chingmyl i
psasIchew.Herstar
eisint
ensesendi
ngheatwav es
t
hroughoutmybody .“Youneededtotel
lmesomet hi
ng.
”Sheisbacktobeinguncomfor
tabl
e.

“YesIdo.First
ly,
whatIf
eelfory
ouisgenui
ne.Ineverexpect
edtofeel
thiswayaboutanyone
elseagain.
”Icanseesheisbatt
li
ngwit
hwhatev ershewantstot
ellme.Itakeherhandi
nmine
toreassureher.

“
It
’sokayt
otel
lmeMonde.Iwon'
tj
udgey
ou.
”Shechuckl
es.I
t’
sempt
yandi
t’
sfake.

“Thet
hingi
s..
.”Shelooksuptowardstheent
ranceandIfol
l
owhergaze.Myhear
tlegi
tst
ops
andsodoesmybr eathi
ng.I
sthisadream?No, ni
ght
mare?
“
Sazi
!”Iexcl
aim.Mymi
ndi
sreel
i
ng.I
tcan’
tbehi
m.

“Babe!
”shedoessothesameti
measme.Hei sroot
edonthespot
.Ift
her
ewasadef
ini
ti
onof
shockhisf
acewouldbeit
.However
,hi
sshockhasnothi
ngonmine.

“Youknoweachother!
”MondeandIaskatt hesametimeaswegetonourf eet
.Myhandi
s
l
ongabandoned.Saziquickl
yrecover
sandcomposeshimself
.Heputshi
shandsinhi
spocket
s
andwalksf
urt
herin.Ican’tr
eall
yreadhi
m buthi
seyesarefi
xatedonMonde.

“Icanexplai
nbabe.”Shesay swithatr
emorinhervoice.Hewal ksunt
ilheisst
andingi
nfrontof
us.Mymi ndslowlyclears.Waitadamnminute!Hejustwalkedin,t
hatmeanshehast hekeys
totheplace.Heistoof amili
arwit
hthi
shouse.Shekeepscalli
nghim babe.Theyknoweach
otheri
ntimatel
y.Icanseei tandmoreimport
antl
yIcanf eeli
t.

“
Cansomeonet
ell
mewhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”Ibr
eakt
hesi
l
ence.

Theyarenotaboutt
othough.Theyar
ejustl
ooki
ngateachot
herasi
fcommuni
cat
ingwi
tht
hei
r
eyes.

“
Babe,
”shewhi
sper
s.

“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me?
”hesay
swi
thhi
sfl
atv
oice.

“I
thappenedsofast
,Idi
dn’tgetachancet o.ThenIwasint
oodeepandIjustwant
edtokeepi
t
j
usttomy sel
f.
”Shetal
kssof astIcanbarelykeepupwit
hmyconfusedsel
f.Hewalksaway
scrat
chi
nghisheadandthenbackagai n.

“
Isshey
ourmi
str
esst
oo?
”Iask.Onl
ythenhel
ooksatmewi
thhi
sst
rai
ghtf
ace.

“
Wif
e.”Mondegasps.Mykneesf
ail
meandIsi
tungr
aci
ousl
yont
hecouch.
Theyar
enotl
ooki
ngatmeoncemor
e.Ir
eal
l
yfeel
li
keani
ntr
uderal
lofasudden.

“
Icanexpl
ain,
”Sazi
say
s.Il
ookf
rom onet
otheot
her
.Ther
eispai
n,shockandsadnessal
lov
er
Monde’
sface.

“Howlong?”shecr
oaks.Dotheyhavetel
epathyorsomethi
ng.Hemov escl
osertoher
.Sheput
s
outherhandasift
owar dhi
m offandhestopsjustbef
orehereachesher
.I’
m si
tt
ingl
ikean
observ
erri
ghtnow.Averyconfusedone.

“
Mo.
”Gr
eathehasapetnamef
orher
.Whatam I
?Lo?

“
Sincewhen?
”

“
It
’sbeenaf
ewmont
hs,
”hesay
s.Sheseemst
obecal
cul
ati
ngi
nherhead.

“
Iknewi
t.You'
vebeendi
str
act
edl
atel
yandev
eryt
imeIaskedy
ousai
dwor
k.”

“
Mo.Youhav
etol
etmeex
plai
n.”

“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me?
”

“
Idi
d.Justnotev
ery
thi
ng.Whydi
dn'
tyout
ell
me?
”

“
Iwassti
llgoi
ngt
o.Ineededt
omakesur
ethi
ngswer
eokaywi
thher
.”Shehasherar
msf
olded
i
nherchest.

“Thi
sismessedup.Howl
onghaveyouknownher
?”Heseemsupsetbuty
oucannev
ert
ell
wit
h
Sazi
.Heal
way shashi
semot
ionsfi
rml
yunderati
ghtl
i
d.

“Acoupleofmont
hs.Theladyfr
om Pi
cknPay!OhmyGod!I
t’
sher!
”shetur
nstome.Fi
nall
yI
exi
st.Ist
opmysel
ffrom r
oll
ingmyeyes.“Hei
sthemar
ri
edguyyouspokeof?Hei
stheone
thatf
oundthekidsi
sn’
t?
”shedoesn’
twai
tformyanswershel
ooksatSazi
forconf
ir
mat
ion.He
nodshishead.

“Excuseme!Ihatetobr
eakt hei
nti
mateconv
ersati
on.I'
m st
il
lher
e.If
eel
Ideserv
emor e
answersthanei
therofyou.Didy
out wopl
aymef oryoursi
ckamusement?”i
t’
saboutt
imet
hey
acknowledgedmyexist
ence.

“
No!
”Theysayi
nuni
son.

“
Thenwhat’
sthi
s?Hetol
dmehewasmar
ri
edandy
out
oldmey
ouar
enot
,”Isayl
ooki
ngat
Monde.“
Whichonei
sit
?”

Agai
ntheyl
ookateachot
her
.Sazimor
epoi
ntedl
y.

“
Wear
enotmar
ri
ed,
”Mondesay
s.

“
Ineedadr
ink,
”Sazi
wal
kst
owar
dst
hebar
.

“
Sohei
scheat
ingwi
thy
ouaswel
l
?”

Shesighsandtakesaseatopposi
teme.Shel
ooksli
keshehasagedtenyears.Sazicomes
backandt akesonel
ookathertheni
mmediat
elygoesonhi
shaunchesinfrontofher.

“
Baby
.”Hebr
ushesherar
msf
orcomf
ort
.

“
Thi
sisamess,
”shesay
s.Icanbar
elyhearher
.

“Hey
.Lookatme.Youdon’
thav
etot
alkabouti
tify
oudon’
twant
,”hesay
s.Hi
shandi
scuppi
ng
herj
aw.

“
Iwantt
o.Shedeser
vest
oknowt
oo.Doy
oul
oveher
?”
“
Wear
enott
alki
ngaboutt
hatr
ightnow.
”Shebl
i
nksandal
onet
eardr
ops.

“FuckMo! ”I’
m perplexed.LikeI’
venev erthoughtMondecoul dbet hisv ul
ner able.Ialsof eela
sharppainatt hepitofmyst omach.Iwantt ocomf ortherandy etIfeel t
hissimmer inganger
j
ustbel owthesur f
ace.I’m goingt oexplodeatanymoment .Theyar eholdingeachot herwi th
Monde’ sheadbur i
edi nSazi’sneck.Hesuddenl ygetsupwi thherinhi sarmsasi fshewei ghs
nothing.Hewal ksawaywi t
houtsay ingawor d.I’v
enev erseensuchal evelofi nti
macyf rom
anyone.Ifeelli
keani ntr
uderi ntheirbubble.Wheny oucheatyounor mal lyconsol ey ourselfthat
atleastthepersonisnothappy .Okaynor mal l
yisanexagger ati
on.It’snotlikeIcheatev er y
chanceIget .I
nmycaset hought hat’
swhatI ’
vebeent r
yingtotellmyconsci ence.Thi sisf ar
from thetr
uth.Theset wol oveeachot her,deeply.Evenabl i
ndper soncant ell
.Whatt hef uck
havet heybeendoingwi thmeal lthi
stime?

Mymi ndiscomingupwi thallsortofscenari

os.Maybeoneofthem i
ssickanddying?Mymi nd
reel
satthethoughtoflosi
ngei t
herofthem.Ormay beMonde pref
erswomen?Butshet ol
dme
thatshelov
edment oo.Shel i
edtomet houghsoIcan’tr
eal
l
ytr
usttheinfor
mati
onshegav e.
I’
m angryatherandIfeelcheatedevenf ur
therbyherbei
ngwhi
skedawayl i
ket
hat.Ideserv
e
answers.

Hee!Whatam Ii
nthissi
tuat
ion?Am Iasidechi
ck?Whoconsi
der
smeasi
dechi
ck?Sazi
or
Monde?Thisi
sfuckedup.Kantiubufebebunj
e?

I’
vebeensi tti
ngher
eforal
mostt hi
rt
yminut
es.Aretheyhavingsex?Withmei nt
hehouse?Why
doest hatangermeandatthesamet i
metherei
sabubbl eofexcit
ement.Ineeddivi
ne
i
nterventi
on!Ithi
nkofor
deri
nganUberbutwhenIt hinkoft
hedistancefrom t
hemaingatet
o
hereIdon’tthi
nkIcanmakeit.I
’
m notkeenonwalkingaimlessl
yaroundthi
sestate.

May beIshoul
dt akeoneoftheircar
sandgohomebutIstil
lneedanswer
sbecauseaft
erthi
s,
I
’m donewiththesepeople.Whateverf
uckedupshi
ttheyar
einto,
Iwantnopartofi
t.I
’
m onmy
f
eetpacingont helushcarpet
.

JustthenSaziwal
ksbackin.Hehaschangedi
ntocomf
ort
abl
ecl
othes.Hecomesal
ltheway
unti
lheissi
tti
ngonthecouch.

“Li
namandl
asit,
”hecommandslikeI
’
m achil
dwhohast oobey
.Isitopposi
tehi
m.Hei
s
poppi
nghisfi
ngerswhi
chmightbeanonl
yindicat
ionofhi
semoti
ons.

“HowisMonde?
”I’
m angr
ybutIst
il
lcar
e.Ist
il
ldon’
tunder
standwhyshehadt
obewhi
sked
away.
“
Shei
sfi
ne.She’
l
lbedowni
nmi
nut
ethenwecant
alk.
”Ij
ustnodmyhead.

“
Sot
hegi
rly
ouwer
etal
ki
ngabouti
smywi
fe?
”

“
Ithoughshesai
dyouwer
enotmar
ri
ed?
”Ichal
l
engehi
m.

“
Wel
ltomewear
e.”

“Areyouorar
en'ty
ou?”Myannoyancei
sback.Ican’
tdealwi
thal
lthesemi
ndgames.I
’
vebeen
honestwit
hthesepeopl
efr
om dayone.Thel
easttheycoul
d’v
edonewastodothesame.He
sighsandl
eansback.

“Wearenot
.”Ifr
own.“Iwanttoandalwayswant
edtobutsher
efuses.Icommit
tedtoher.
Hencether
ing.I
nmyhear twearemarri
ed.
”Ohwell
.Goodfory
ou.Ihaveasarcast
icresponse
att
hetipofmyt onguebutIhol
dback.

“Youar
enotv
erygoodathonour i
ngyourcommitments.
”Hegiv
esmeadar kl
ookthatsends
chil
l
sdownmyspine.Ishi
ftuncomfor
tabl
y.“I
’
m sorr
yIdidn’
tmeant
ojudge,
”Iqui
cklyadd.

“Maybeyouarenotr
eadyfort
hisconver
sat
ion,
”hemumbles.Mondecomesinalsoi
nher
sweatpant
sandatee.Shewal
ksuntil
sheisstandi
ngbyus.Shei
sbrushi
ngherarmsasi
f
feel
i
ngcold.

“I
’
m sureyouhavemanyquest
ions,
”shereferst
ome.Ijustrai
semyeyebr
ow.Shegoesand
si
tsnextt
oSazi.Myt
ummyconst ri
ts.I
tcouldbehungerpangswhoknows.

“
Youtwohavel
iedt
omerepeat
edly.Ihav
ebeennot
hingbuthonestwi
thyouandy
etyou
r
epeat
edl
yfedmeli
es!
”Mondelooksdowninshame.Sazi
hasthatwhatt
hefuckl
ook.

“
Howexact
lydi
dIl
i
etoy
ou?
”Real
l
y!Mor
emi
ndgames!
“
Yout
oldmey
ouwer
emar
ri
ed!
”

“Whatwoul dyouhavemer athertelly

ou?ThatIwasi nacommi tt
edr elati
onshipforov erten
yearsandthatIhavecommi ttedmyhear ttoher.ThatIlivedwi ththef earthatawomanwoul d
comeandt akeherawayf r
om me!Of ferherwhatIcouldn’t!Ort hatithurteverytimeshe
ref
usedt omarryme.LikeIwasn’ tgoodenoughf orher!”Hei sv erycont r
oll
edbutIcansee
dif
ferentemoti
onsrefl
ecti
ngf rom hi
sey es.Mondei sintearswi thherhandi nhis.It
hinkshei s
actuall
yshockedtohearallt
hi s.I
’
m speechless.“
No.Idi dn’tfuckenl i
et oyou.Ijustdidn’ttel
l
youthesordiddetai
l
sofmyr elati
onship.
”Mondecl earshert hroat.

“HowcanyoudoubthowIfeel
aboutyou.I
’
mt heonewhoi sn’
tenoughf
oryou.I’
mt heonewho
alway
sli
vedi
nfearthaty
ou’dt
ir
eofmeandf indbet
ter
.Someonewhocanof feryouwhatyou
needandwhatyoudeser
ve.
”Icanbar
elyhearher
.Heturnstoherandcupsherface.

“Youareenoughf
orme.IknowIcheatedandIshoul
dhavetol
dyouwhenImetLi
namandlabut
Ineededtobesur
ebef
orebringi
ngherint
oourspace.Ibr
okeourpr
omi
seandI’
m sor
ry.
”

“
I’
m sorryt
oo.Ishould’
vetoldyouabouther
.Ijustneededtobeself
ishwit
hher,
youknow.”She
i
sholdinghi
shandsagai nstherf
aceashisthumbswi peshert
ears.Thenhepul
lsheri
ntoa
t
ighthugalmostli
ft
ingherup.

“
Ihavet
ogo!”Iquicklygetupandwalkaway.Ican’ttakeitanymor
e.Wat
chi
ngt
hem t
oget
her
f
eel
sweirdanditalsohurts.If
eel
sidel
inedandinsignif
icant
.

Thear
ebot
hont
hei
rfeet
.

“
Lonapl
easedon’
tgo.West
il
lneedt
otal
k,
”Mondei
sal
mostbeggi
ng.Ist
opandf
acet
hem.

“Nowedon’
t!Ineedy
oubot
houtofmyl
i
fe.Idon’
twantt
oseeei
therofy
ou.What
everweal
l
hadi
sover!
”

“
CanIatl
eastdr
ivey
ouhome?
”Sazi
asks.
“
No.I
’
llt
akeanUber
!”I
'
vef
orgot
tenhowi
mpr
act
ical
thati
s.

“
Atleastl
etourdr
ivert
akey
ouhome.Babypl
easecal
lMl
ungi
si,
”Mondesay
s.OurandBaby
wenana!

Hetakesouthisphoneandmakesacal l
.Afterhehangsupheletusknowt hatt
hedriverwi
l
l
beupfr
ontinaf ewminutes.Weareall
standingther
einawkwardsilence.Notevenoneofmy
manyquestionshasbeenanswered.Theonlythingt
heywereabletotellmeaboutisthei
r
mari
talst
atus.Evenwit
ht hatI
’
m sti
l
lnotclear.

“Howar eyouinvol
vedwi t
hTsietsi
?”Ifeel l
i
keIneedalltheanswerstot hi
spuzzle.Therei
s
mor etot hesepeopl
ethanmeet stheey e.CallmeparanoidbutI
’m beginni
ngtothinkit’
sno
coincidencethatwemet .Someoneor chestrat
edthewhol ebl
oodything.Mykids!Ilethi
mt ake
myki dsawayf r
om metohis‘Safeplace’.Fuck!WhyhaveIbeensonai veandstupid?Mypal ms
start
ssweat i
ngasmyhear tbeat
slikeadr um.

“
Whathav
eyoudonet
omyki
ds?
”

(Lif
ehasbecomehecticforme.Ievencont
emplateddi
scont
inui
ngt hestor
ybutdeci
ded
againsti
t.Iwi
l
lnothavesetdaysorti
mestopost.I’
l
lpostwheneverI’
m abl
e.Thankyouf
or
yourpati
enceinadv
anced.)

Chapt
er15

“
Thesewat
erscangetal
i
ttl
ebusy

ButIgotex
per
ience

Don'
tmi
ndt
rekki
ngt
hrought
hest
orm

LongasIknowt
haty
ou'
reher
ewi
thmebaby

Sheddi
ngal
lyouri
nnocence

Iseet
hewal
l
sar
elooki
ngl
i
ket
heymi
ghtpr
eci
pit
ate

Unt
ilI
'
minsodeep,
it'
supt
omyway
s

ButIpr
omi
segi
rlIai
n'
taf
rai
d
I
t'
srai
ningi
nsi
dey
ourbed

Nopar
tsar
edr
y

Lov
ingmadey
ousowet
,yourl
egs,
yourt
highs

Andev
ersi
ncewef
ir
stmetIknewt
hat

I
,IknewIwasr
eadybabyt
otaket
hatdi
ve”
-Usherbaby

Wedriveinsilenceunti
lwegettoherarea.Thenwedr ivi
ngt hr
oughast unninglybeauti
fulgated
count
ryestate.Thisiswheret
herichstay.Noscratchthat,wealt
hy.It
’shardt obeli
evethatone
canfi
ndsuchat ranqui
lpl
aceevenwithintheper
ipheralofthebustli
ngcity
.Shemustr eall
y
comef rom aweal thyf
amil
y.Imeanev enwithhersalaryIdon’tseeheraffordingsuchapl ace
onherown.

Wedr i
vethrought
hewindingroadint
oastandal
onehouse.I
t’
samassi
vepieceoflandt
hati
t’
s
l
ocatedin.Shepar
ksontheequallymassi
vedri
veway.The7seri
esf
rom t
heotherdayis
par
kedt her
eamongstothercars.

“
Wear
eher
e,”shesay
s.Ipi
ckupmyj
awf
rom t
hef
loorandsnapmymout
hshut
.

“
Ist
hisy
ourhouse?
”Iexcl
aim.

“
Yes.
”That
’sal
lshesay
s.

“
Doy
oul
i
veal
oneher
e?”Thi
scoul
dhouseatl
eastt
enpeopl
e.

“Notexact
ly.
”Sheisbeingcrypt
icall
ofasuddenandI’
m confusedasfuck.If
oll
owasshe
stepsoutofthecar
.Sheopenst hebootandgetsmyoverni
ghtbagthenIfoll
owheri
ntot
he
house.Myeyesarealloveradmiri
ngthebeaut
yandthegrandeuroft
heplace.

Thefrontdooropensint
oabeauti
fuldecor
atedentryarea.Ther
earewindingstairsdownthe
passagewhichI’
m assumingl
eadtothebedrooms.Wi deopendoorsonei thersi
deoft he
entr
ancearea.Sheputsmybagbyt hecoathangerandmov est
owardstheent r
anceont helef
t.
Icanseeahugeki t
chenanddini
ngintheri
ght.Ifol
l
owheri ntoanequall
ybeaut i
full
ivi
ngarea.

“
Any
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”sheasks.I
’
m suddenl
ypat
ched.Ibel
i
eveI
’
minwayov
ermyhead.
“
Yesagl
assofr
edwi
nepl
ease.
”Shewal
kst
owar
dsabarar
eaont
heot
hersi
de.

“
Takeaseat
,”shesay
s.

Iwalktentat
ivel
ytowar
dsthecomf
ortablel
ooki
ngcouches.I
ssuei
sthattheyar
eof
fwhi
teand
theyseem li
kenooneusesthem.I
’
mr el
uct
anttoevensi
tonthem.Shecomestomewit
htwo
glassesofwineandgivesmemyglass.Thenshetakesaseat
.

“Si
tLonaIdon'
tbit
e.”Shepat
sthespacenextt
oher
.Iper
chmyassont
heedge.“Whyar
eyou
soupt
ight
?Relax
.”

Ideci
det
osi
tbackandIsi
nki
ntot
hel
uxur
iousheav
ent
hati
sthesecouchest
hent
akeasi
pof
mywine.

“
Whatisitt
hatyouwant
edtot
ell
me?
”Iaskaf
ewsecondsl
ater
.Sheheav
esahugesi
ghand
l
ookssl
ight
lyuncomf
ort
abl
e.

“
Ihavetostar
tfr
om thebegi
nni
ngf
oryout
ounder
stand.
”Justt
henmyphoner
ings.Iexcuse
mysel
ftoanswer.Sheget
supandwal
ksawaygi
vi
ngmepr i
vacy.

“
Hel
l
o.”

“
Linamandl
a.”Thatdeepv
oicedr
ivesmysensesi
ntoaf
renzy
.

“
Hey
.”Il
ookar
oundt
oseei
fMondei
sn’
tcl
oseby
.

“
Howar
eyou?
”

“
I’
m goodandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m good.Li
stenIcamebackunexpect
edl
y.AnychanceIcant
akey
ououtf
ordi
nner
?”heasks.

“
Unf
ort
unat
elyImadepl
ans.
”

“
Oh.
”Hesoundsdi
sappoi
nted.“
Anot
hert
imet
hen.
”

“
Sur
e.”Ther
eissi
l
ence.

“
Okay
.Letmenotkeepy
ou.
”

“
Sazi
!”Iqui
ckl
ycal
lout
.

“
I.
..
I.
..may
bet
omor
row?
”Whatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
thme?

“Looki
ngforwar
dtoit.Goodnight
.”Hehangsupbefor
eIsayanythi
ng.Justt
henMondewal ks
backwithaplat
ter
.Sheplacesitonthecoff
eetabl
e.I
t’
sacheeseplatt
erwit
hcr acker
sand
somef r
uit
.Shegoesandbr i
ngsthewholebott
leofwi
neandplacesitonthetableaswell
.

“
Ithoughtwecoul
dsnackwi
tht
hisbef
oredi
nner
.”Shet
akesaseatnextt
ome.If
eel
but
ter
fl
ies
i
nmyt ummy .

“Thi
slooksdel
i
cious,”Isaypi
ckingupapieceofcheeseandpoppi
ngi ti
ntomymout h.
Deli
ci
ous.Shei
swat chingmyl i
psasIchew.Herstar
eisint
ensesendi
ngheatwav es
t
hroughoutmybody .“Youneededtotel
lmesomet hi
ng.
”Sheisbacktobeinguncomfor
tabl
e.

“YesIdo.First
ly,
whatIf
eelfory
ouisgenui
ne.Ineverexpect
edtofeel
thiswayaboutanyone
elseagain.
”Icanseesheisbatt
li
ngwit
hwhatev ershewantstot
ellme.Itakeherhandi
nmine
toreassureher.

“
It
’sokayt
otel
lmeMonde.Iwon'
tj
udgey
ou.
”Shechuckl
es.I
t’
sempt
yandi
t’
sfake.

“Thet
hingi
s..
.”Shelooksuptowardstheent
ranceandIfol
l
owhergaze.Myhear
tlegi
tst
ops
andsodoesmybr eathi
ng.I
sthisadream?No, ni
ght
mare?
“
Sazi
!”Iexcl
aim.Mymi
ndi
sreel
i
ng.I
tcan’
tbehi
m.

“Babe!
”shedoessothesameti
measme.Hei sroot
edonthespot
.Ift
her
ewasadef
ini
ti
onof
shockhisf
acewouldbeit
.However
,hi
sshockhasnothi
ngonmine.

“Youknoweachother!
”MondeandIaskatt hesametimeaswegetonourf eet
.Myhandi
s
l
ongabandoned.Saziquickl
yrecover
sandcomposeshimself
.Heputshi
shandsinhi
spocket
s
andwalksf
urt
herin.Ican’tr
eall
yreadhi
m buthi
seyesarefi
xatedonMonde.

“Icanexplai
nbabe.”Shesay swithatr
emorinhervoice.Hewal ksunt
ilheisst
andingi
nfrontof
us.Mymi ndslowlyclears.Waitadamnminute!Hejustwalkedin,t
hatmeanshehast hekeys
totheplace.Heistoof amili
arwit
hthi
shouse.Shekeepscalli
nghim babe.Theyknoweach
otheri
ntimatel
y.Icanseei tandmoreimport
antl
yIcanf eeli
t.

“
Cansomeonet
ell
mewhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”Ibr
eakt
hesi
l
ence.

Theyarenotaboutt
othough.Theyar
ejustl
ooki
ngateachot
herasi
fcommuni
cat
ingwi
tht
hei
r
eyes.

“
Babe,
”shewhi
sper
s.

“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me?
”hesay
swi
thhi
sfl
atv
oice.

“I
thappenedsofast
,Idi
dn’tgetachancet o.ThenIwasint
oodeepandIjustwant
edtokeepi
t
j
usttomy sel
f.
”Shetal
kssof astIcanbarelykeepupwit
hmyconfusedsel
f.Hewalksaway
scrat
chi
nghisheadandthenbackagai n.

“
Isshey
ourmi
str
esst
oo?
”Iask.Onl
ythenhel
ooksatmewi
thhi
sst
rai
ghtf
ace.

“
Wif
e.”Mondegasps.Mykneesf
ail
meandIsi
tungr
aci
ousl
yont
hecouch.
Theyar
enotl
ooki
ngatmeoncemor
e.Ir
eal
l
yfeel
li
keani
ntr
uderal
lofasudden.

“
Icanexpl
ain,
”Sazi
say
s.Il
ookf
rom onet
otheot
her
.Ther
eispai
n,shockandsadnessal
lov
er
Monde’
sface.

“Howlong?”shecr
oaks.Dotheyhavetel
epathyorsomethi
ng.Hemov escl
osertoher
.Sheput
s
outherhandasift
owar dhi
m offandhestopsjustbef
orehereachesher
.I’
m si
tt
ingl
ikean
observ
erri
ghtnow.Averyconfusedone.

“
Mo.
”Gr
eathehasapetnamef
orher
.Whatam I
?Lo?

“
Sincewhen?
”

“
It
’sbeenaf
ewmont
hs,
”hesay
s.Sheseemst
obecal
cul
ati
ngi
nherhead.

“
Iknewi
t.You'
vebeendi
str
act
edl
atel
yandev
eryt
imeIaskedy
ousai
dwor
k.”

“
Mo.Youhav
etol
etmeex
plai
n.”

“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me?
”

“
Idi
d.Justnotev
ery
thi
ng.Whydi
dn'
tyout
ell
me?
”

“
Iwassti
llgoi
ngt
o.Ineededt
omakesur
ethi
ngswer
eokaywi
thher
.”Shehasherar
msf
olded
i
nherchest.

“Thi
sismessedup.Howl
onghaveyouknownher
?”Heseemsupsetbuty
oucannev
ert
ell
wit
h
Sazi
.Heal
way shashi
semot
ionsfi
rml
yunderati
ghtl
i
d.

“Acoupleofmont
hs.Theladyfr
om Pi
cknPay!OhmyGod!I
t’
sher!
”shetur
nstome.Fi
nall
yI
exi
st.Ist
opmysel
ffrom r
oll
ingmyeyes.“Hei
sthemar
ri
edguyyouspokeof?Hei
stheone
thatf
oundthekidsi
sn’
t?
”shedoesn’
twai
tformyanswershel
ooksatSazi
forconf
ir
mat
ion.He
nodshishead.

“Excuseme!Ihatetobr
eakt hei
nti
mateconv
ersati
on.I'
m st
il
lher
e.If
eel
Ideserv
emor e
answersthanei
therofyou.Didy
out wopl
aymef oryoursi
ckamusement?”i
t’
saboutt
imet
hey
acknowledgedmyexist
ence.

“
No!
”Theysayi
nuni
son.

“
Thenwhat’
sthi
s?Hetol
dmehewasmar
ri
edandy
out
oldmey
ouar
enot
,”Isayl
ooki
ngat
Monde.“
Whichonei
sit
?”

Agai
ntheyl
ookateachot
her
.Sazimor
epoi
ntedl
y.

“
Wear
enotmar
ri
ed,
”Mondesay
s.

“
Ineedadr
ink,
”Sazi
wal
kst
owar
dst
hebar
.

“
Sohei
scheat
ingwi
thy
ouaswel
l
?”

Shesighsandtakesaseatopposi
teme.Shel
ooksli
keshehasagedtenyears.Sazicomes
backandt akesonel
ookathertheni
mmediat
elygoesonhi
shaunchesinfrontofher.

“
Baby
.”Hebr
ushesherar
msf
orcomf
ort
.

“
Thi
sisamess,
”shesay
s.Icanbar
elyhearher
.

“Hey
.Lookatme.Youdon’
thav
etot
alkabouti
tify
oudon’
twant
,”hesay
s.Hi
shandi
scuppi
ng
herj
aw.

“
Iwantt
o.Shedeser
vest
oknowt
oo.Doy
oul
oveher
?”
“
Wear
enott
alki
ngaboutt
hatr
ightnow.
”Shebl
i
nksandal
onet
eardr
ops.

“FuckMo! ”I’
m perplexed.LikeI’
venev erthoughtMondecoul dbet hisv ul
ner able.Ialsof eela
sharppainatt hepitofmyst omach.Iwantt ocomf ortherandy etIfeel t
hissimmer inganger
j
ustbel owthesur f
ace.I’m goingt oexplodeatanymoment .Theyar eholdingeachot herwi th
Monde’ sheadbur i
edi nSazi’sneck.Hesuddenl ygetsupwi thherinhi sarmsasi fshewei ghs
nothing.Hewal ksawaywi t
houtsay ingawor d.I’v
enev erseensuchal evelofi nti
macyf rom
anyone.Ifeelli
keani ntr
uderi ntheirbubble.Wheny oucheatyounor mal lyconsol ey ourselfthat
atleastthepersonisnothappy .Okaynor mal l
yisanexagger ati
on.It’snotlikeIcheatev er y
chanceIget .I
nmycaset hought hat’
swhatI ’
vebeent r
yingtotellmyconsci ence.Thi sisf ar
from thetr
uth.Theset wol oveeachot her,deeply.Evenabl i
ndper soncant ell
.Whatt hef uck
havet heybeendoingwi thmeal lthi
stime?

Mymi ndiscomingupwi thallsortofscenari

os.Maybeoneofthem i
ssickanddying?Mymi nd
reel
satthethoughtoflosi
ngei t
herofthem.Ormay beMonde pref
erswomen?Butshet ol
dme
thatshelov
edment oo.Shel i
edtomet houghsoIcan’tr
eal
l
ytr
usttheinfor
mati
onshegav e.
I’
m angryatherandIfeelcheatedevenf ur
therbyherbei
ngwhi
skedawayl i
ket
hat.Ideserv
e
answers.

Hee!Whatam Ii
nthissi
tuat
ion?Am Iasidechi
ck?Whoconsi
der
smeasi
dechi
ck?Sazi
or
Monde?Thisi
sfuckedup.Kantiubufebebunj
e?

I’
vebeensi tti
ngher
eforal
mostt hi
rt
yminut
es.Aretheyhavingsex?Withmei nt
hehouse?Why
doest hatangermeandatthesamet i
metherei
sabubbl eofexcit
ement.Ineeddivi
ne
i
nterventi
on!Ithi
nkofor
deri
nganUberbutwhenIt hinkoft
hedistancefrom t
hemaingatet
o
hereIdon’tthi
nkIcanmakeit.I
’
m notkeenonwalkingaimlessl
yaroundthi
sestate.

May beIshoul
dt akeoneoftheircar
sandgohomebutIstil
lneedanswer
sbecauseaft
erthi
s,
I
’m donewiththesepeople.Whateverf
uckedupshi
ttheyar
einto,
Iwantnopartofi
t.I
’
m onmy
f
eetpacingont helushcarpet
.

JustthenSaziwal
ksbackin.Hehaschangedi
ntocomf
ort
abl
ecl
othes.Hecomesal
ltheway
unti
lheissi
tti
ngonthecouch.

“Li
namandl
asit,
”hecommandslikeI
’
m achil
dwhohast oobey
.Isitopposi
tehi
m.Hei
s
poppi
nghisfi
ngerswhi
chmightbeanonl
yindicat
ionofhi
semoti
ons.

“HowisMonde?
”I’
m angr
ybutIst
il
lcar
e.Ist
il
ldon’
tunder
standwhyshehadt
obewhi
sked
away.
“
Shei
sfi
ne.She’
l
lbedowni
nmi
nut
ethenwecant
alk.
”Ij
ustnodmyhead.

“
Sot
hegi
rly
ouwer
etal
ki
ngabouti
smywi
fe?
”

“
Ithoughshesai
dyouwer
enotmar
ri
ed?
”Ichal
l
engehi
m.

“
Wel
ltomewear
e.”

“Areyouorar
en'ty
ou?”Myannoyancei
sback.Ican’
tdealwi
thal
lthesemi
ndgames.I
’
vebeen
honestwit
hthesepeopl
efr
om dayone.Thel
easttheycoul
d’v
edonewastodothesame.He
sighsandl
eansback.

“Wearenot
.”Ifr
own.“Iwanttoandalwayswant
edtobutsher
efuses.Icommit
tedtoher.
Hencether
ing.I
nmyhear twearemarri
ed.
”Ohwell
.Goodfory
ou.Ihaveasarcast
icresponse
att
hetipofmyt onguebutIhol
dback.

“Youar
enotv
erygoodathonour i
ngyourcommitments.
”Hegiv
esmeadar kl
ookthatsends
chil
l
sdownmyspine.Ishi
ftuncomfor
tabl
y.“I
’
m sorr
yIdidn’
tmeant
ojudge,
”Iqui
cklyadd.

“Maybeyouarenotr
eadyfort
hisconver
sat
ion,
”hemumbles.Mondecomesinalsoi
nher
sweatpant
sandatee.Shewal
ksuntil
sheisstandi
ngbyus.Shei
sbrushi
ngherarmsasi
f
feel
i
ngcold.

“I
’
m sureyouhavemanyquest
ions,
”shereferst
ome.Ijustrai
semyeyebr
ow.Shegoesand
si
tsnextt
oSazi.Myt
ummyconst ri
ts.I
tcouldbehungerpangswhoknows.

“
Youtwohavel
iedt
omerepeat
edly.Ihav
ebeennot
hingbuthonestwi
thyouandy
etyou
r
epeat
edl
yfedmeli
es!
”Mondelooksdowninshame.Sazi
hasthatwhatt
hefuckl
ook.

“
Howexact
lydi
dIl
i
etoy
ou?
”Real
l
y!Mor
emi
ndgames!
“
Yout
oldmey
ouwer
emar
ri
ed!
”

“Whatwoul dyouhavemer athertelly

ou?ThatIwasi nacommi tt
edr elati
onshipforov erten
yearsandthatIhavecommi ttedmyhear ttoher.ThatIlivedwi ththef earthatawomanwoul d
comeandt akeherawayf r
om me!Of ferherwhatIcouldn’t!Ort hatithurteverytimeshe
ref
usedt omarryme.LikeIwasn’ tgoodenoughf orher!”Hei sv erycont r
oll
edbutIcansee
dif
ferentemoti
onsrefl
ecti
ngf rom hi
sey es.Mondei sintearswi thherhandi nhis.It
hinkshei s
actuall
yshockedtohearallt
hi s.I
’
m speechless.“
No.Idi dn’tfuckenl i
et oyou.Ijustdidn’ttel
l
youthesordiddetai
l
sofmyr elati
onship.
”Mondecl earshert hroat.

“HowcanyoudoubthowIfeel
aboutyou.I
’
mt heonewhoi sn’
tenoughf
oryou.I’
mt heonewho
alway
sli
vedi
nfearthaty
ou’dt
ir
eofmeandf indbet
ter
.Someonewhocanof feryouwhatyou
needandwhatyoudeser
ve.
”Icanbar
elyhearher
.Heturnstoherandcupsherface.

“Youareenoughf
orme.IknowIcheatedandIshoul
dhavetol
dyouwhenImetLi
namandlabut
Ineededtobesur
ebef
orebringi
ngherint
oourspace.Ibr
okeourpr
omi
seandI’
m sor
ry.
”

“
I’
m sorryt
oo.Ishould’
vetoldyouabouther
.Ijustneededtobeself
ishwit
hher,
youknow.”She
i
sholdinghi
shandsagai nstherf
aceashisthumbswi peshert
ears.Thenhepul
lsheri
ntoa
t
ighthugalmostli
ft
ingherup.

“
Ihavet
ogo!”Iquicklygetupandwalkaway.Ican’ttakeitanymor
e.Wat
chi
ngt
hem t
oget
her
f
eel
sweirdanditalsohurts.If
eel
sidel
inedandinsignif
icant
.

Thear
ebot
hont
hei
rfeet
.

“
Lonapl
easedon’
tgo.West
il
lneedt
otal
k,
”Mondei
sal
mostbeggi
ng.Ist
opandf
acet
hem.

“Nowedon’
t!Ineedy
oubot
houtofmyl
i
fe.Idon’
twantt
oseeei
therofy
ou.What
everweal
l
hadi
sover!
”

“
CanIatl
eastdr
ivey
ouhome?
”Sazi
asks.
“
No.I
’
llt
akeanUber
!”I
'
vef
orgot
tenhowi
mpr
act
ical
thati
s.

“
Atleastl
etourdr
ivert
akey
ouhome.Babypl
easecal
lMl
ungi
si,
”Mondesay
s.OurandBaby
wenana!

Hetakesouthisphoneandmakesacal l
.Afterhehangsupheletusknowt hatt
hedriverwi
l
l
beupfr
ontinaf ewminutes.Weareall
standingther
einawkwardsilence.Notevenoneofmy
manyquestionshasbeenanswered.Theonlythingt
heywereabletotellmeaboutisthei
r
mari
talst
atus.Evenwit
ht hatI
’
m sti
l
lnotclear.

“Howar eyouinvol
vedwi t
hTsietsi
?”Ifeel l
i
keIneedalltheanswerstot hi
spuzzle.Therei
s
mor etot hesepeopl
ethanmeet stheey e.CallmeparanoidbutI
’m beginni
ngtothinkit’
sno
coincidencethatwemet .Someoneor chestrat
edthewhol ebl
oodything.Mykids!Ilethi
mt ake
myki dsawayf r
om metohis‘Safeplace’.Fuck!WhyhaveIbeensonai veandstupid?Mypal ms
start
ssweat i
ngasmyhear tbeat
slikeadr um.

“
Whathav
eyoudonet
omyki
ds?
”

(Lif
ehasbecomehecticforme.Ievencont
emplateddi
scont
inui
ngt hestor
ybutdeci
ded
againsti
t.Iwi
l
lnothavesetdaysorti
mestopost.I’
l
lpostwheneverI’
m abl
e.Thankyouf
or
yourpati
enceinadv
anced.)

Chapt
er16

“
Iusedt
owakeupsomeday
s

Andwi
shI
'
dst
ayedasl
eep

CauseIwentt
obedont
opoft
hewor
ld

Todayt
hewor
ldsont
opofme

Ev
ery
body
'sgotopi
nions

(
Theyshar
e)

Theyai
n'
tbeeni
nmyposi
ti
on

(
Theydon'
tcar
e)
Thati
tbr
eaksmyhear
twhenIhearwhatt
hey

Hav
etosayaboutmey
eah

(
Whatt
heysay
)

Seemsl
i
keIal
way
sfal
lshor
t(f
all
i
n'shor
t)

Ofbei
nwor
thy(
Lor
dIai
n'
twor
thy
)

CauseIai
n'
tgoodenough(
nono)

Buthest
il
ll
ovesme(
sti
l
llov
esme)
”-
Bey
onceandWal
terWi
l
li
ams.

Sazii
sgr
indi
nghi
sjaw.Mondehasadeepf
rown.Sheact
ual
l
ylooksatmeasi
fI’
vel
ostmy
mind.

“
Iaskedy
ouaquest
ion.Whathav
eyoudonet
omyki
ds?
”Ir
epeatal
mosthy
per
vent
il
ati
ng.

“Whatcouldwepossi
blydot
oyourki
ds?
”Sazi
’
sresponsei
squi
etbutdeadl
y.Hei
sact
ual
l
y
annoyed.

“
Yout
ell
me!Howshoul
dIt
rusty
ouaf
terwhatI
’
veseen!
”

“Youneedtocal
m down.Haveaseatandgi v
eusachancet oansweryourquesti
ons.Fr
ankl
yI
can'
tdealwi
thal
lthi
sshouti
ng.Youcan’
treall
ybehereandwantt oactl
ikeavict
im.YouknewI
wasinacommi t
tedrel
ati
onshi
pandthatdidn’tst
opy
ouf r
om sleepi
ngwithme,”hesays.
MondeandIbothgasp.Hayishamewhenhespeaksuy adelel
a.

“
Yousl
eptwi
thher
?”shewhi
sper
s.

“Mocutmesomesl ack.Didn’tyousleepwi t
hhertoo?Now.Wear eall
notsaintshere.We
fuckedup.Somemor et
hanot hers.Thisisnoti
met opointf
ingers.Wear egoingtositdown
l
iketheadult
sweareandhav eaci v
ilconver
sat
ionthenmov eforwardfrom t
here.Fi
rstthi
ngI
needistoeat.I
’
m hungr
y.I’
llgoor ganisewit
hthecook.Getyourselv
est oget
herandj oi
nmein
thedini
ngroom.”Wit
hthathet urnsar oundandleavesusbothstunned.

Webot
hst
andt
her
eawkwar
dly
.Mondecan’
tev
enl
ookatme.Ev
ent
ual
l
yshel
eadsmet
othe
di
ningr
oom.Onepartofmewantst
ogetawayfr
om her
eandr unasfaraspossi
ble.Theot
her
par
tisr
eal
lyi
nter
est
edtofi
ndoutwhatt
hehel
lj
usthappened.Thel
aterpar
tswins.

WefindSazi
alreadyseatedatt
heheadofthetable.I
t’
satwel
veseat
ertabl
e.Il
ovethi
shouse.
I
thasmor el
if
et hanMonde’sof
fice.I
thasasi
milarthemetot
hetownhousesoI’
m guessi
ngit
’s
moreSazi
’si
nfluencethanMonde’s.

Wej oi
nhim,Mondeonhi
sri
ghtandmeonhislef
tli
kesisterwi
vesabubbl
eoflaught
eralmost
escapemebutImanagetopul
lmysel
ftowar
dsmy sel
f.Therei
sabot
tl
eofwineinthetabl
eand
aglassforeach.

“
Wine?”Sazioffer
sme.Ineedsomethingstr
ongerbutIjustnodmyhead.Hepoursformeand
t
henforhiswife.Hehaswhatseemstobeast rongerdri
nk.Justthent
woladi
esinbl
ackand
whi
teunifor
m comei nbri
ngi
ngfoodandplaci
ngItont het abl
e.Whendidt
heyev
encook?
Weretheyhereallal
ong?Oncet
heyhav eser
vedust heyleave.

Sazistartseat
ingwhil
emeandMondepl aywit
hourfood.Howcanheeatatat i
mel i
kethi
s.
Thet ensi
onintheroom coul
dbecutwi t
haknife.Hemusthavebeenhungrybecausehe
fi
nisheshisfoodandgetsupt or
efi
llhi
sdrinkt
henheretur
nstothetabl
e.Hesit
sandwat ches
usplay i
ngwithourfoodli
ketwoli
tt
leki
ds.

“I
fyouaredonewecangot othel
oungeandhav eourdiscussi
on,
”hesays.Wedon’targue.We
bothgetupandItakemyrefi
l
ledglassofwinewit
h.Onceseatedwhichissepar
atefr
om each
other
.It
’sbet
tert
hanhav
ingthem gluedatt
hehip.Heleadstheconv
ersati
on.

“Fir
stl
ylet
’sgetsomethi
ngstraightLinamandla,
ther
eisnot
hingsi
nist
ergoi
ngonhere.Your
kidsaresafeandwecangof etcht hem toni
ghti
fyouwantbutImustcauti
ony
outhatthestat
e
aroundtheirsecur
it
ysti
l
lremainsat hreat.
”

“
Ijustwantt
ogoseet
hem.May
bet
omor
rowwoul
dbebet
ter
,”Isay
.

“Nowwi thregar
dstothislovetr
iangl
eI’
m asshockedasyouare.I’
m act
uall
ymadatmy sel
ffor
notf
indingoutsooner.Ijustnev
erthoughti
twouldgether
e.Maybet hecluesweretherebutI
hadotherthingstoworryaboutli
keyourex,ki
dsmissi
ng.I
’m def
ini
tel
ynotami ndreader.
Ididn’tsetouttosleepwi thyou.Ifoughti
tashardasIcouldbutIjustkeptbei
ngpulled
towardsy ou.IwasashonestasIcoul dwit
hy oubutIcoul
dn’tr
eal
lybareital
lwit
houtbeing
honestwi thMof i
rst.”I’
m notsurewhyI ’
m annoyedathimthough.IguessI’
m avoidi
ngto
confrontthebetrayal f
rom Monde.Ilookatherandshehascomposedher sel
f.Leani
ngbackon
thecouchwi thonel egov ert
heot her.Ohyesshei st
heepitomeofrelaxi
ng.

“
Ist
il
ldon’
thav
etheanswer
sIneed.Cany
oubot
hexpl
ainy
our
sel
ves.
”

“
Ihav
etost
artf
rom t
hebegi
nni
ng,
”Sazi
say
s.Ir
aisemyey
ebr
ow.

Hesoundssoser
ious.Hescr
atcheshi
shead.Icanseet
hisi
sdi
ff
icul
tforhi
mtoshar
e.

“Igrewupinanor phanage.
”Ifeelacoldchi
llcut
ti
ngthroughmymi ddl
e.I
’
m afr
aidofwhatI
’
m
abouttohearallofasudden.“Apparentl
yIwasjustdroppedonthei
rdoor
stepwrappedi
na
blanketwit
hnothingbutapieceofpaperwithmynameoni tort
heyassumeditwasmyname.”
Hecont i
nues.Hi
sv oicei
sf l
atanddev oi
dofemot i
ons.

“Anyway.Igrewupwai tingtobeadopt edbutnot hi

ngevercamet hrough.WhenIwasy ounger
therewasthisladythereAuntMaywhor ai
sedus.Shewasl i
keamot hertous.Eventhoughwe
wereinanor phanagewenev erlackedf orany t
hing.Wellaccordi
ngtoourneedsany way.I
formedabondwi t
haf ewki dstheremost l
yy oungerthanme.Ther ewer etwogir
lsIwascl ose
to.Iconsi
deredthem myy oungersisterssincet heyonlyarr
ivedwhenIwast hree.Tocutt he
storyshor
t.WhenIwast enAuntyMaydi ed.Thingsbecamewor sefrom ther
eon.Theper son
whot ookover,Doll
y ,
hadi ll
int
entsf ortheplace.

Theolderki
dshadtodoallsor
toft hi
ngstomakemoneyforher.Sheprosti
tutedtheoldergir
ls
andtheolderboy
sbecamepettythieves.Atmyaget
houghIsti
l
l di
dn’tunderst
andwhatwas
goi
ngon.Isawmybi gsi
stersget
tingsickandmostdyi
ng.Theolderboyswoul ddisappearone
byone.

Asf orustheyoungoneswebecamet hesl avesi nthehouse.Dol l

yhadf iredmostoft hehouse
helpandwehadt odoallt
hecleaningchores.Wenev ersaidanythi
ngt oany onebecauseshe
kepttell
ingusifwedidwewoul dbesepar atedt onev erseeeachot heragain.WhenIwas
twelvesheaskedmet ojointheol
derboy st ohelppr ovide.Theystartedbyt eachi
ngmehowt o
pickpocket.IwassmallandIwasf ast.Aper fectcandidate.Oncet heywer econfidentIcould
doi t
,theywentwithme.Isti
l
l r
emembert hef i
rstbagIsnat ched.Idon’tremembert hepersonit
belongedto.Irememberthefearthathadgr ippedmeasIr anformyl if
e.Ididn’tevennotice
t
hatt
heyhadst
oppedchasi
ngme.Ir
anunt
ilIr
eachedt
hehome.

WhenDol lycheckedthroughthepur sesheonlyfoundR50.Shescreamedatmecal l

ingmeal l
sortofnames.Ihadt odobet t
er.Whycoul dn'
tIcheckoutmytarget
sbetter
?Shethreatenedto
sel
l mysistersifIdi
dn’
tdobet t
er.Youcani maginewhatthatdi
dtomyt welvey
earoldmi nd.I
neededtopr otectmysister
s.Icouldn’taf
for
dtol oset
hem aswell,
theywereal
lIhad.”

ThisisdeeperthanIthought
.I’
m notsureIwanthimtocontinue.Thi
sisashardforhi
mt otal
k
aboutasiti
st ohear
.Hemi ghtseem nonchal
antabouti
tbutIcanseet hr
oughthefacade.
Mondeiswat chi
nghim withanint
enselookli
kesheisabsorbinghispai
n.Shehasheardthi
s
befor
eIcantell.

“Iworkedhar dandi
mprovedmycraftunt
ili
tbecameeasi
er.Idevelopedcer
tai
nskil
ls,picki
ng
l
ocks, hotwiri
ngcar
sandal l
.Noonesuspectedachil
daroundapar kedcar
.WhenIt urned
fi
fteenIwasdeemedoldenought ojoi
nhousebreaki
ngsandheists.Myheightwasn'thelpi
ng
asIwast al
l
erthant
heaveragef
if
teenyearold.

Onmyf irsthousebr
eakingthi
ngswentbad.Theownerhadagun, dogsandanalarm sy
stem.
Hecaughtont ousandst ar
tedshoot
ing.Ir
ananddidn’tl
ookback.If
oundoutthenextday
thatal
ltheboy st
hatIhadgonewithwereshotdead.Iwaster
ri
fi
edatthethoughtofwhat
could’
vehappened.

Dollywasn'timpr essedthatallhergoodboyswereeit
herdeadori nprison.Icouldseemy self
permanent l
ybeingat hugandt hati
snotalif
eIhadenv i
sionedf ormy self
.IknewIwoul ddie
veryy oungifcont i
nueddownt hatpath.Mostofmysisterswer ealreadywor ki
ngaspr osti
tutes
andj aded.Onlytwower esti
l
linnocentSanewasoneoft hem.Byt henDol l
yhadt urnedthe
placei nt
oabr othel-t
hughome.Shepi mpedoutt hegir
lst otheseweal thyoldermenl ooking
foryoungv i
rgins.

Thisdayshehastakenmyy oungersi
sterRoseandgivenhertothi
solderman.Shewent
ki
ckingandscreaming.IwatchedastheydraggedherawaywithSaneterr
if
iedthi
nki
ngshe
couldbenext
.Wef oundherdead,hangingf
rom thecei
li
ngthefoll
owi
ngmor ning.

That’
swhenIpl annedmyescape.Iwasn' tgoi
ngtocontinueli
vingthereanyl
onger
.Eventhe
str
eetswer ebet
terthanthehel
lholewewer ein.Myonlywor r
ywasSane.Unt il
onedaythese
youngerlooki
ngguy scameinlookingforagoodt i
mebutwer esurprisedtof
indachi
ldast hei
r
goodtime.Theyor der
edhertogochangeandr emovehermake- up.Onceshehadoneoft he
guysofferedtopayDollyahundredthousandrandsforher.Dol
lydidn’tev
enthi
nkaboutitshe
agr
eedonthespot
.Thatwasthel
astIsawofSaneunt
ilafewyear
slaterwhenIlooki
ngfor
her
.Onl
ytofi
ndouttheguywhoboughtherendedupmarr
y i
ngher
.ThatishowImetBheki
.

From t
hatdayIr anawayf rom Dol l
y’
scl
utchesandliv
edont hestr
eetsforacoupleofmont hs.
School hadbeenabandoned, Icouldn’
tkeepup.Hungerwast hemostpr ev
alentneed.Oneday
whil
eIwasscout i
ngforfoodi nthebinsIsawthisDojoorstudi
owi t
hkidsmyagewal ki
ngin.I
wentandwat chedt hr
ought hewi ndowastheytr
ainedunti
lthei
rtr
ainerspottedmeandi nv
ited
mein.Heaskedi fIwantedtojoinandIagreedbutItoldhi
mt hatIdidn’
thavemoney .Hetold
met helessonswer efr
eesoIj oinedafight
.Igotki
ckedoneandpassedout .Hungerwil
ldot hat
toyou,”hechucklesasifit
’saf unnymemor y.

“Iwokeuphour sl atert
oanempt ystudi
oandasmel lofpizza.Thei nstr
uct ortol
dmet oeat.
AfterIfinishedgobbl i
ngdownt hepizzaonl ythenheaskedmequest i
onsaboutmy
wher eabout s.Onceheest abl
ishedt hatIhadnopl acetost ayheof fer
edmear oofovermyhead
i
nt hest udiooncondi ti
onIcleanedt hepl ace.Ibecameacl eanerthen.Hepai dmeanal l
owance
thatwasenoughf orfood.Ididn’tcompl ain.Hegotmemyuni form andIwentbackt oschool .I
n
myf r
eet imeIt rainedwithhim.Thatwasmyl if
eunt i
lItur
nedei ghteen.Ihadj ustfi
nishedhi gh
school whenhewaski l
ledandt henewowner shadsi ckmot iv
esf orthepl ace.Theybuiltan
under coverf i
ghtingcage.Wher ey oufoughtunt i
leit
heroneofy oupassedoutordi ed.Ifound
thatmyi nstruct
orhadl i
stedmeashi sbenef ici
ary.Funnythingist hatIdidn’ti
nheri
tany t
hing
i
nst eadIi nherit
edadebtt hatIneededt opayof f.

ThenewguysusedSaneasl everage.Idi
dn’tknowwher eshewasbuttheynew.Theyhad
pi
ctur
esofherinherschooluni
formt heythreat
enedtoki l
lheri
fIdi
dn’
tpaybackthedebt
.The
onl
ywayIcouldpaythem backwast obecomet hei
rfi
ghter.

Myskilli
mpr ovedandIgotbet teratit
.Ev enthoughatt imesmybodywoul dbesobangedupI
couldbarelymoveaf ingerIbecameat ruefi
ght er
.Iwasf eared.Peoplestart
edbettingmor eon
me.IknewIhadwhat ev erdebtIowedpai dupbutt hemanIwasdeal i
ngwithwasr uthless.
Threatsgrewagai nstSaneandbecamemor er eal.Iremembert hi
smancl earlyasifitwas
yester
day.Hehadacr uel smil
eonhi sf acealway s.Hef oundpleasureinseeingpeopl ebeaten.
Hewasawel lknowmaf ia.Doll
ywasasmal lfrycompar edtohim.Hehadasoncl oset omy
ageandaspoi ltbr atIdon’ teventhinkhenot icedany onearoundhi m.Hebel i
evedthatt he
worldowedhi m somet hing.Iwonderi fheknewt henwhathi sfatherwasintobuthesur espent
hismoney .AndthatmydearLi nawasy ourex-husband, ”hesayshi seyesboringi
ntomi ne.I
gaspatthatrevelation.That ’
stheonl yreacti
onIhav e.

“
Anywayther
ewast hisbi
gfightwithal
lthewho'
swhoint
hebusi
nessgather
edinonevenueto
wi
tnesst
hebiggestcagefi
ghtyet.Thestakeswer
ehi
ghandt
hewinnertookall
.Iwont
hefight
butwasl ef
thal
fdead.Theonl
ysav
inggracewasthatt
heguyal
sopassedoutandthey
declar
edmeawi nner.Iwasi
noneoftherooms,r
ecover
ing,
whent
hisboywholookedmyage
walkedin.

“
Ibeenlooki
ngever
ywheref
ory
ou,
”hesai
d.Icoul
dn'
tev
enr
espond.Ij
ustl
ookedathi
m wi
th
myeyesbarel
yopened.

“Someskil
lyougot.Butdudewhythefuckwoul
dyoudothi
st oy
oursel
f?Ithoughtyouwere
bothdead.Neverseenanyt
hingl
ikei
tbefor
e.Whomakeskidsdothi
sshit!Andformydadto
evenfi
nditent
ertai
ningi
sjustsi
ck!
”hewasmor el
i
kespeakingt
ohimselfmorethananythi
ng.

Af
terImanagedtolethi
m nothatIhadnochoi
cehefr
eakedoutmore.Thenextt
hingIknew
hi
sfatherwaspay
ingoffmyinvi
sibl
edebtandIwasmovedtohishome.That’
showImetAt hi
.

Theytookcareofmeunt il
Ihealed.Hi
smot herwassweet,hi
sf at
herwasdownri
ghtpi
ssed
aboutthewholething.Hecal
ledmeast ray.OneofAt
hi’
slatestproj
ect
s.Appar
entl
yAthiwas
knownf orhi
srescuingofthi
ngsespeciall
ypets.

If
oundoutthatheplayedsoccerashi
shobby.Hewasgoodatit
.Imadehim got
oSundowns
Academyandt hatwasthebegi
nningofhi
ssoccercar
eerwhi
chblossomedt
oint
ernat
ional
st
atus.Hi
sfatherhatedmemor e.

OnceIwasbackonmyf eet
,heloanedmesomemoneyandIboughtagazeboandv acuum
cleanerandst
artedmyowncarwash.Iwasrenti
ngar oom wi
thhi
shel
pofcourseunti
lthe
carwashmademoney .I
tgrewtoashisany
ama.Ist udi
edBusi
nessManagementpart
-t
imeand
thatiswhenIgrewanddevel
opednewbusinesses.

Iwasbecomingat hreatt
ot heol
dergenerati
onandIwasn'tevenawar e.Iwasjusthussli
ng.
Tsi
etsi
’sf
atherbeganbeingonmycase.Di sr
uptingmybusi
nesses.Sendingthugstothreaten
me.Oncetheystartedwit
ht heSaneshitagain.Iwasol
derandwiser.Iacti
vel
ylookedforher
unt
ilIf
oundher.Shehadj usttur
nednineteenandwasmar r
yingBheki.

Bheki wasalsoanupcomi
ngt hughimself.Hewaswel
lknownandfearedinhi
sneighbour
hood.
Ididn’tcar
eaboutanyoft
hat.Icaredthathetr
eat
edmysisterwel
landthathetookovert
he
protecti
onroleandhewasbetterati
tthanIwasbecausehespokethesamelanguagewitht
he
thugs.
Threeyear
safterIopenedmycarwashIwasdonewi t
hmydegr eebutIneededtofur
thermy
st
udiesatUni
versit
y.Ienr
oll
edandhadtostudymyhonoursdegreeful
ltime.IhadBhekil
ook
aft
ermybusiness.Iwasstil
lrunni
ngi
tbutnotasi
nvol
vedasIwould’
veliked.

That’swhenImetMonde.”Forthef
ir
sttimesincehest
art
edhi
sret
ell
i
ngIseeasmi
leonhi
s
face.Helooksatherandt
heylookateachotherasi
fcommuni
cati
ngwit
hthei
rmi
ndsandt
hen
shenodsherhead.

“
Ineedadri
nk,
”hesays.Thenhegetsupandgoest orefi
llhisgl
ass.Ourwi
nebott
leisonthe
t
abl
esoIhelpmysel
f.Ihavealumpinmyt hr
oatanditwon’ tgodown.Myhear
tisbleedi
ngfor
t
heyoungSazi
.Myheartisreel
i
ngattheknowledgethatIonceconsider
edMaseel
a’sfamil
y.

Sazi
isbackandhei
ssi
l
entf
orawhi
l
esav
our
inghi
sdr
ink.

“WherewasI ?Right.Meetingthisoner i
ghther e,”hepointsatherandshebl ushes.“ I
twasin
somebl ockpartyandshewassl oshed.Hergi rlfri
endatthetimewashel pi
nghert owalkinto
thei
rroomsandf ai
li
ngasshewasdr unkhersel f.SoIhelpedthem outandt hatwasabegi nning
ofabeaut i
fulr
elati
onship.Iwast akenbyher .Shewaswi tty
,funandsof ullofli
fe.Hersmi l
e
couldmakey ousell al
lyourbelongings.Shewast heli
feoftheparty.Ibel
ieveev erymanand
womanwant edherbutsadl yshewasi narelationshipwithRoxanne.Until
oneni ghtRoxanne
wasawayandwewer ebothdrunkonet hi
ngl edt oanotherandshef oundusi nbedt henextday
withournakedbodi estangledtogether.Thatwast heendofRoxyandabegi nni
ngf orus.

Wewer einseparable.Wemadepl ans,talkedmar ri

ageandkids.Everythi
ng.Forthefir
stti
mein
myl i
feIwasi nlove.Aft
erUniversit
ywemov edintoget
her.Igrewmybusi nessshestart
ed
working.Twoy earsint
oourr el
ationshi
psheaskedmet omar r
yher .Shehadt heringand
everyt
hing,”heshowsmehi shandasi fIwoul dfor
gett
her i
ng.Monde’ seyesgli
stenswith
unshedt ears.“Shedidn’tknowIhadar ingtoaskherbutthenIdi dn’tcar
ewhoaskedwhoIwas
readytomar r
yher .Iworetheri
ngbecameaj okeamongstourf r
iendsandf amil
y,”hechuckl
es
asifhel ovedbei ngthebuttofaj oke.

“Ihadjustpur
chasedmyf i
rstbui
l
ding.Unbeknownstt omeMaseelahadbeenamongstt
he
i
nt er
estedpar
ti
es.Hel osttomeandt hatmadehim angry
.Hesworerev
enge.Thi
sIhear
d
throughthegr
apevine.Ididn’
tpayattenti
ontoitbecauseIact
ual
l
ythoughttheol
dmanwasjust
bluff
ing.

Ar
oundt
hesamet
imewef
oundoutt
hatMondewaspr
egnant
.Icoul
dn’
tbel
i
evehowl
i
fehad
turnedoutf orme.Fi nallyIwasget ti
ngmyownl it
tlefami l
y.Thenthewor sthappened.Maseel a
kidnapsMonde.Onl ythenIf oundouthewaspar tofaser i
ousmaf iagroupinGaut engatt he
ti
me.Theyf eltthreatenedbyt heupcomi ngy oungst ersinthebusiness.Iaskedf orBheki ’shel p
torescueher .Bythet i
mewegott hr oughmostofourmenwer edead.Wewer enotj ustdeal i
ng
withoneper sonher eandwewer eoutnumber ed.Wewer eupagai nstthewhol emaf ia.When
wegott her
eMaseel adeci dedt oteachmeal essonast heyhadust iedup.Hehadmewat chas
hel i
teral
lyremov edourbabyf rom t hewombandl efthert heretodiewhileIwat ched,”he
pausesashechokesup.Myhear t.Myhear tisinpi eces.I’
m numb.Whatt heset wohav ebeen
throughi si
nconcei vable.Hecl earshi sthroatandcont i
nues.Mondemov esclosertohi m gr abs
hishandandhol dsitti
ght.Hewi l
lnotcr ythatIatl eastknowbutIal soknowhei sreli
vingt he
whol eordeal.Hisey esar ethewi ndowt ohisshat t
eredsoul .Ican’
thelpthet earsthatescape
myey es.Theymusthav ebeensoy oung.

“Wef inall
ymanagedt ofreeourselvesandrushedhertothehospital
.Itwastouchandgowi th
herli
febutshewassav edtoliv
ewi thapermanentloss.Shecouldneverconceive.Ineeda
break.Canwecont i
nuewi ththi
st omorrow?It
'ski
ndofl at
e.Doy oumind?”heasksme.Ishake
myspi nningheadwildl
y.I
t’senoughf oroneday.I
’m notevensureIwanttoheart hedynamics
oftheirrel
ati
onshi
p.Myhear tisjustsoheavy.Hegetsuppat t
ingMonder eassuri
nglyandthen
hewal ksaway .Weremainseatedf orafewmi nut
eswi t
houtspeaking.

“
Doyoumindspendi
ngtheni
ght
?”Icheckt
het
ime.I
t’
sal
mostmi
dni
ght
.I’
mtoodr
ainedt
oev
en
mov
efrom t
hecouch.

“No,
Idon’
tmi
nd,
”Ir
espond.

“Okay.Letmeshowy out oyourr

oom.”Sheget supandIf ol
l
owherinsi
lenceoutt
heli
vi
ngar
ea,
pi
ckingupmybagandt hengoupt hestai
rsi
ntot hesecondl
evel
.Shewalksmeint
othi
s
beauti
fulandai
rybedr
oom.“You’llhaveever
ythingyouneedhere.
”

“Okay
.Thanky
ou.
”

“
I’
m sorryLona.Idi
dn’
tli
etohurtyou.Ijustdi
dn'
twanttoloseyou.Iwaspl
anni
ngontel
l
ingy
ou
t
onight
.”Ijustnodmyhead.I
’m notreadytodealwi
ththatbetr
ayalyet
.“Goodni
ght
.”

“
Goodnight
,”Irespond.Iwantt
ohol
dher.Shel
ooksshat
ter
edaswel
l
.Shewal
ksawaycl
osi
ng
t
hedoorbehindher.Ifl
opmyexhaust
edbodyonthebed.
“
Fuckme!
”

Chapt
er17

"
Rightf
rom t
hest
art

Youwer
eat
hief
,youst
olemyhear
t

AndIy
ourwi
l
li
ngv
ict
im

Il
ety
ouseet
hepar
tsofme,
thatwer
en'
tal
lthatpr
ett
y

Andwi
thev
eryt
ouchy
ouf
ixedt
hem

Nowy
ou'
vebeent
alki
ngi
nyoursl
eepohoh

Thi
ngsy
ounev
ersayt
omeohoh

Tel
lmet
haty
ou'
vehadenough

Ofourl
ove,
ourl
ove

Justgi
vemear
eason,
justal
i
ttl
ebi
t'
senough

Justasecondwe'
renotbr
okenj
ustbent
,andwecanl
ear
ntol
oveagai
n

I
t'
sint
hest
ars,
it'
sbeenwr
it
teni
nthescar
sonourhear
ts

We'
renotbr
okenj
ustbent
,andwecanl
ear
ntol
oveagai
n

I
'
m sor
ryIdon'
tunder
stand

Wher
eal
loft
hisi
scomi
ngf
rom

It
houghtt
hatwewer
efi
ne(
Ohwehadev
ery
thi
ng)

Yourheadi
srunni
ngwi
l
dagai
n

Mydearwest
il
lhav
eev
ery
thi
n'

Andi
t'
sal
li
nyourmi
nd(
Yeahbutt
hisi
shappeni
n'
)

You'
vebeenhav
in'
real
baddr
eamsohoh

Youusedt
oli
esocl
oset
omeohoh

Ther
e'snot
hingmor
ethanempt
ysheet
sbet
weenourl
ove,
ourl
ove

Ohourl
ove,
ourl
ove"
-Pi
nk
Chapt
er17

“
Oht
earduct
sandr
ust

I
'
llf
ixi
tforus

We'
recol
l
ect
ingdust
,butourl
ove'
senough

You'
rehol
dingi
tin

You'
repour
ingadr
ink

Nonot
hingi
sasbadasi
tseems

We'
l
lcomecl
ean”
-Pi
nk

Ican’
tsl
eep.Mymi ndi
sbuzzingwithmorequest
ions.Atthesamet i
memyhear ti
sbleedi
ng.I
'd
beheart
lessnott
o.Youcannotjudgeabookbyitscover.Theset
wol ookedsowel
lputtoget
her.
Liket
heyownedtheworldbutthescar
stheycarr
ywithinaretoodeepforanormalbei
ngto
comprehend.

Hownai veam I?Ireal

lyneedascaletomeasur emynai v
eté.ImeanIwaswi t
ht heTOSf orso
manyy ears,
borehim chil
dren,
spenthismoneykant ii
t’
sbloodmoney !Ineverreall
yknewt he
personImar r
iedto.Buti
tdoesexplai
nhisTOSbehav i
our.NowI ’
l
lbetiedtothi
si mbecil
eforli
fe.
Wear eindangerbecauseofhim!Thenhisf at
her!Igetchil
l
sthinki
ngaboutwhathei scapable
of.Ifhecandowhathedi dt oMondeforjustabuil
dingwhatwoul dhedof orhisgrandki
ds?

Monde.Ohmy
!Nomatterhowangr
yIam atherIcannotst
opthepai
nIfeel
onherbehal
f.No
womanshoul
dgot
hroughwhatshedi
d.Howdoesonesur viv
esuchandcomeoutawhol e
per
son?

Icanf eelaheadachecoming.Sl
eepseemsfaraway .Idecidet ogetupandmakemy selfsome
herbal t
ea.IlookatwhatI
’
m wearing.Hecki
tmightbet oomucht oprancearoundthehouse
withtheskimpyt eddy
.InmydefenceIwaspreparedfortheni ghtofdebaucheryandendless
orgasms.Il aughatmyonejoke.Eventhemorni
nggowni sn’tcoveri
ngmuch.Ahwel lthetwo
l
ov ebirdsareprobabl
yasl
eepany way.

Iwalkt hroughthedar
knessandfindmywaytothekitchen.Thi
shouseistoobigmaan.Lucki
l
y
thealarm sy st
em i
sn’
ton.If
indthehumongouski
tchenandsuddenlyfeel
likecooki
ng
somet hing.That’
showiti
s.Itj
ustmakesyouwanttocook.Ican’twai
ttoseeitwhenther
eis
properli
ghting.RightnowI ’mrelyi
ngont heli
ghtfrom out si
de.Ievent
uall
yfindt hefridgeand
thenI’
m conf usedwi thallthechoi ces.Thereiscakeandt hereismeat.Butwai tIdidn’tcome
hereforfood.Imagi nebei ngcaughtr ummagi ngthef r
idgeforfoodinthemi ddleoft henight.
Peoplemi ghtgett hewr ongi mpressionaboutme.Il ovefoody esbutIdon’tbinge.Ideci deto
pourmy selfagl assofmi lk.Istandupst r
aightfr
om mybendi ngposit
ionandt henf eel eyeson
me.Islowl yturntofindSazi st
andi ngbyt hedoor.Fuckme!Hei sonlywearinghi sbodyshor ts
andhishot nessi sondispl ayforthei nnerhoetoindulge.Ialsoknowbecauseoft helightsfr
om
thefri
dge,hecanbasi call
yseeev enmypubi chairthat’showt r
ansparentmyout f
iti
s.

“
Hey
,”hegr
eet
s.

“
Ineededagl
assofmil
k,
”whyohwhyam Iexpl
aini
ngmyself
.Hejustnodshi
sheadandwal
ks
t
owardsme.I
’mroot
edonthespotandmyhear
tisgal
l
oping.Iam ahopel
esscase.

Heisst
andi
nginf
rontmelooki
ngatmeexpectant
ly.Isuddenl
yfeel
mor
ethi
rst
y.Thequest
ion
i
s,f
orwhat?Il
i
ckmylipsandhi
seyesf
oll
owt hemov ement.

“
Excuseme,
”Ir
eal
i
seI
’
m bl
ocki
ngt
hef
ri
dge.ThenIqui
ckl
ywal
kaway
.

“
Goodni
ght
.”I
’
m al
mostspr
int
ingoutoft
heki
tchen.

Jer
r.Thi
smandr
essedi
saki
l
lerhal
fnaked,
hei
spot
ent
.It
akemyov
erheat
ed-
sel
fupt
hest
air
s
tomyroom.

It
’sastr
uggl
etofal
lasleep.Ihaveat wit
chingvj
aythatrequi
resi
mmediat
eatt
ent
ion,
badl
y.I
knowIwon'tbeabl
etof al
lasleepuntil
Itakecareofi
t.SoItakemat
ter
sint
omyownhands.It
onlyt
akesafewminutesbef oreIgetmyr el
ease.

I’
m notsurewhenIfal
lasl
eep.Iwakeupthefol
l
owingdayfeel
inghungr yandsti
llwitha
headache.Idi
dn’
thavemucht oeatt
heprevi
ousni
ght.Iwearmyl eggingsandanov ersi
zedt
-
shir
tthengolookforf
ood.Thi
shouseinbroadday
lighti
sanotherthingall
toget
her.It’
s
stunni
ng.

JustasIentertheki
tchenIfi
ndMondesi t
ti
ngonthekit
cheni
slandwithSazibetweenherl
egs.
Theirl
i
pslockedinapassionatekiss.Theyareobl
i
v i
oustomypresence.Idothemostnormal
thi
ngandwat ch.Iwonderi
fhef i
ndsherl i
psassoftonhi
m astheyusuall
yarewithme.Doeshe
dotheythi
nghedoeswithhi
stonguewhenhel
etsmeknowhewant
sme.Mh.Theybot
hst
op
andtur
n.Crap.Imi
ghthavemoanedal
oud.

Sazisl
owlyst
epsawayafterpul
l
ingMonde'
st-shir
tdown.Oohbabyyoudon’
thav
etohi
deal
l
that
.I’
m pr
ett
yacquai
ntedwitht
hosepeckybabies.Myi
nnerhoeisi
nheaven.

Shecl
imbsdownfr
om t
heki
tcheni
slandl
ooki
ngmor
efl
ust
eredandst
andst
her
ewi
thherar
ms
huggi
ngher
sel
f.

Sazi
walkst
owardsmeandI’
m sti
ll
blocki
nghi
sexit
.Hecomescl
oseenought
ofeel
theheat
emanat
ingf
rom hi
m.Thenhepushesmeagainstt
hewall
wit
houtt
ouchi
ngme.

“
Soy ouhaveat
hingf
orwatchi
ng,
”hewhi
sper
sagainstmyear.Mywholebodyi
sonfi
re.Ican’
t
missthehar
dbul
geagai
nstmyabdomen.I
tsendsallt
heheatpool
i
ngtowardsmywomb.

“
It
srudetost
are,It
houghtwehadest
abli
shedthi
s.”Thenhewal
ksof
f.It
henr
emembert
hat
Mondeisi
ntheroom.Theheati
nhereyesisunmistakabl
y.

I’
m suddenl
ynervousaboutt
hemomentIj ustshar
edwithSazi
.Shedoesn'
tseem bot
heredbyit
though.Wel
l,atl
eastnoti
nthatway.Thenshewalksuptome.Wal ki
ngisput
ti
ngitmil
dly.She
stal
ksmel i
keI'
m herprey
.I’
m st
il
li
nthesameposi t
ionSazil
eftmein.

“
Youseem t
obei
nabi
tofasi
tuat
ionher
e,”shewhi
sper
sasshet
akest
hesameposi
ti
onSazi
wasi
n.

“Whatisitthatyouneed? ”shenibbl
esmyearl
obe.I’
velostal
labil
it
yt ospeak.Ishoul
dbeangry
ather.Ishouldn’
tev enletherbet hi
scl
osetomebuther ewear e.Ifeelherhandundermyt -
shi
rtgoingformyt autnipple.Themomentshetouchesit,
theheatthatisspreadingt
hroughout
mybodyi ntensif
ies.

“
Didhel
eav
eyoual
lhotandbot
her
ed?
”goshev
enherv
oicei
sdr
ivi
ngmewi
l
d.

“Woul
dyouli
kemetotakecareofi
tfory
ou?”shecont
inueswi
thherpur
ri
ng.If
eel
herhand
goi
ngundermysweatpant
sintomywarm sheat
h.
“
Wel
l
,wel
l
,whatdowehav
eher
e?”Iknowshecanf
eel
mysl
i
pper
ywetsl
opes.

“OhmyLona,howdarehel
eaveyoul
ikethi
s,
”I’m al
mostwhi
mperingathertouch.Thenshei
s
unrel
ent
ingwi
thhert
humb.Iopenmylegssli
ghtl
ytogi
veherbet
teraccess.

“
Younaught
ythi
ng.Youwantt
hisdon’
tyou?Doy
ouwantmet
omakey
oucum?
”

“
Yes,
”myv
oicecomesoutasasqueak.

“Thenfor
giveme.”Shestopsherteasi
ngandlooksatmestr
aighti
ntheey es.Ican’
tkeepup.
Mysensesar eonoverl
oad.Iwanthertoconti
nuewit
hwhatsheisdoing.Herhandi ssti
ll
cuppingmymound.“ Pl
easeLona,I’
m sor
ryforhur
ti
ngyoubabyitwasn'
tmyi ntent
ion.
”Ican
seethesincer
it
yinhereyes.

“
Youhur
tme.Al
lIaskedf
orwast
otal
honest
ybuty
oul
i
edt
ome.
”Imanaget
osay
.

“
Iknow.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
rybutIwasn’
treadyt
olosey
ou.Icoul
dn’
t.
”

“
Sti
l
lyoushoul
d'
vet
oldme.
”Hert
humbci
rcl
esmynub.Iknowwhatshei
sdoi
ngandi
tswor
king.

“
I’
ll
makei
tupt
oyou,
Ipr
omi
se.
”Shecont
inuesbui
l
dingt
hepr
essur
e.

“
Ist
il
ldon’
tknowhowi
t’
sgoi
ngt
owor
k.”

“Wewillgett
her
e.”Sheismoreinsi
stentandIcanf
eel
thebui
l
dupasshesucksonmyneck.I
grabherbythewaistandpul
lhercl
osertome.ThenIf
eelt
hebegi
nni
ngofmycli
max.Ther
eis
nogoingbacknow.

Somet
hingtel
l
smet oopenmyeyesandtheycol
li
dewit
hSazi
'sl
eaningnonchal
antagai
nstt
he
wal
lwatchi
ngus.Hecaptur
esmyeyesasIexpl
odeinMonde’
shand.Ican’
tseem t
olookaway.
Mywholebodyisshaki
ng.

“Heiswat
chi
ngusisn’
the?
”MondeasksandIjustnod.“
Youlovedit
?”Iwanttosayy
esbutI
’
m
notsur
ewheret
hesetwoareheadi
ngandIst
il
lhaveunansweredquest
ions.
Shepul
lsherhandoutandstar
tsl
ickingherfi
nger
sassheturnsandwal kt
owardsSazithen
smashesherli
psonhis.Hedoesn'twasteti
me,hepi
cksherupandl eav
estheroom wit
hher.
Theyl
eavemet her
eashakingmess.Fuck!Thesetwoar
ehottogether.Whythefuckdothey
needmefor?

Afewmi nut
eslat
erI’
m sti
lli
nthekit
chenmakingmy selfcoffee.I
ttookmeawhi l
etoget
ever
ythi
ngbutnowI’m good.Ihavemycoffeewit
hacr oissantthatIfoundi
nthefr
idge.Once
I’
m doneIgobacktomyr oom foraneededshower.Ifeelsti
cky.

JustasIlandupthestai
rsIheardi
sti
nctmoans.Yougottobefuckenkiddi
ngme!Itcan’
tbe
real
l
ywhatIt hi
nkiti
s.Myinnerhoeurgesmetofindout
.Iwalktowardsthel
astbedroom
wherethesoundsseem tobecomingf r
om.Judgi
ngbyitsposi
ti
oning,Icantel
li
t’
sthemain
bedroom.

Allt
heotherbedroomsarecl
osedex
ceptfortheone.Thedoorissli
ght
lyopened.Thecl
oserI
getthemoredisti
nctt
hemoansbecome.Theyarenotforced.I
t’
snotforshow.No,shei
sreal
ly
havi
ngagoodt ime.Judgi
ngfr
om myexperi
encewithhisski
ll
,Iknowsheishavingadamn
goodtime.

Iwalkunti
ltheyarei
nmyclearvi
ew.Sheisont opwit
hherlonghercascadi
ngi nwavesdown
herspi
ne.Hermov ementi
snotrushedorhurr
ied.Nosheistaki
nghertimerotati
ngherhi
ps.I
can’
tseeSazi j
usthi
shandsonherass.Theysqueezeandoccasional
l
ygoupherbackand
downtoherassagain.NowthatI’
m cl
oserIcanhearhismoansaswel l
.Thereisasheenof
sweatall
overherback.

Ifeelmycooki ecl
enchingpainfull
y.Whenshepi cksupthepaceIfeell
ikescreamingmyneed.I
knowt heyarecloset ot
heircompleti
on.Hermov ementi
slesscoordi
natedandhisgriponher
assist ighter
.Ther oom i
snowf i
l
ledwit
ht hei
rloudmoansandgr oans.Ifeel
likeapeepingTom.
Av eryhor nypeepingTom.Thi sisbett
erthanwat chi
ngporn.I
tdoesthingstomeIcan’ treal
l
y
explain.

Hepul l
sherdownbyherneckast hei
rli
pslock.Thei
rbodi
esarelockedinatightembraceas
theyri
det heirwaveoforgasm.Icometomysensesanddashawayt omyr oom downt he
corri
dor.Iinstantl
ygoi
ntotheshower.I
’
m awetmess.Idon’teventhinkDIYwi l
lbeenough.But
Igiveitatryany waywi
thimagesofthei
rcoit
usbombar di
ngmyhead.Ev enaftermyreleaseI
knowIst i
llneedmor e.
OnceIfeelli
keI’
vecalm downabi tIdeci
detogodownt hest
airs.I
’
v echangedintoasi mpl
e
l
oosefitt
ingdress.Iwalkdownstai
rsandfindt
hem downstai
rshavingbreakfast
.Myst omach
i
mmedi atel
yalert
smet omyhunger.Themomentt heyseemeMondeget sonherf eet.Shei
s
weari
ngshor t
sandat ee.Theoutf
itmakesherlookwaytooyoungbutatt hesamet imeshe
exudessexappeal.Icanf eel
Sazi
'seyesonmeandi t’
sunset
tl
ing.

“Hey.Comej oinusforbr
eakfast,
”shesays.Li
keIneededaninv
itat
ion.Shepull
sachai
rforme
andInot i
ceit’
stheoneclosertoher.Wearenotfl
anki
ngSaziaswedi dtheprevi
ousni
ght.I
s
shemar kingherter
ri
tor
yalready?If
eell
aughterbubbl
ingupandIsuppressit
.Thisi
snotime
formyst upi
djokes.

“
Woul
dyoul
i
kesomecof
fee?
”Sazi
final
l
yspeaks.

“
Yespl
ease.
”Heget
supandgoest
omakemeacup.

“Youlookbeauti
ful
,
”Mondesays.Ifeelbut
ter
fl
iesinmytummy.“Ar
ey ouokay?”Icanseet
he
sincer
it
yinhereyesandt
heuncertai
ntyaswell.Thatt
ugsatmyheart
str
ings.

“
I’
m good.Hadanint
erest
ingmorning.Youshoul
dcloseyourdoorwhenyouhaveguest
sov
er.
”
Hereyeswidenandt
henreali
sat
iondawnsonhert henherfacet
urnsbeetr
ed.

“Ohshi
t.Thatwasn’
tint
ent
ional
.IswearLona.
”

“
Whatwasn’
tint
ent
ional
,
”Sazi
asksashepl
acest
hecupofcof
feeI
nfr
ontofme.

“
Thanky
ou.
”

Het
akeshi
sseatandl
ooksatusexpect
ant
ly.

“
Iwasjusttell
i
ngyourwif
ethatyouneedtocl
oseyourdoor
swheny
ouhav
eguest
s.”Iseea
f
li
ckerofsurpri
sei
nhiseyesbuthequickl
ymasksi
t.

“
Sawany
thi
ngi
nter
est
ing?
”heasks.
“
May
be.
”Hechuckl
esandr
esumewi
thhi
sbr
eakf
ast
.Idi
shupf
ormy
sel
fandst
arteat
ing

Weenj
oyourbreakf
astov
erl
i
ghtconv
ersat
ion.Whenwef
ini
shweal
lcl
eart
het
abl
eandmov
e
t
othel
ivi
ngroom.

“
Lastnightwasabitheav
y.It
’sbeenawhi l
esi
nceweretoldourst or
ytoany
one.It
’ssomethi
ng
MondeandIhav ehadtodealwit
h.We’vedeal
twit
hiti
ntensi
vely.ToapointwhereIhadtoeven
l
ettheideaofr
evengego.Icoul
d’veki
l
ledMaseelaandhisoff
spr i
ng’sj
ustl
iket
hatbutit
wouldn’
tbri
ngourbabybackanditwouldn’
tmakeMowhol eagai n.

Lif
ewentonandweembr aceditandli
ved.ButMondeneveracceptedmyproposalaf
ter
ward
thatsaga.Sheal
way stel
lsmet hatshei
skeepingmyopt i
onsopenedincaseImeetsomeone
whocanmakebabi esforme.Whatshef ail
stounder
standisthatshei
senoughforme.Wecan
adopt,dosurr
ogate.Therearesomanyway st
ohaveababy .
”Hesay st
hatlooki
ngather.They
shareamomentandt henher esumes.

“WhatIcouldn’tr
unawayfr
om wast hefactthatMondei sbi
sexual
.ShelovedwomenandI
knewthatatsomepointIwoul
dn’tenoughf orher
.Shealsofel
tforsomer easonsthatshe
wouldn’tbeenoughf
orme.Wedi scussedthepossibi
li
tyofanopenr el
ati
onship.Openandstil
l
remainmonogamous.Confusi
ngIknow.Whati tmeantforuswaswef oundsomeonet ojoi
n
ourunionandbecomepartofus.Wewoul dhav etobewi t
hthepersonifthesaidperson
all
owed.

Overtheyearsweneverr
eal
l
ycl
i
ckedwi
thany
one.Shewoul
dfi
ndpeopl
eshel
i
kedbutIwas
neverint
erest
edi
nthem.”

“
Itj
ustf
eltwr
ongt
obewi
thany
onebuthi
m,”Mondef
inal
l
yspeaks.

“Itwasei t
herthegirl
sfor
getaboutmethemomenthecomesi nt
othepictur
e.Wet r
ied
swinging.At er
ribl
eideaf
orus.Icoul
dn’
tst
andseei
nghi
mt ouchingsomeoneelse.Hedef
ini
tel
y
couldn’tstandanothermantouchi
ngmeandImustsay,Inev
erwantt ohaveanotherman
touchingmeei ther.

Wedeci
dedt
oletf
atepl
aysi
tsel
fout
.Inst
eadofact
ivel
yseeki
ngf
oraper
sonwet
houghtwhy
notj
ustenjoyourli
vesandletitgo.I
fithappensi thappens.Wewi llnotf
orcet hi
ngs.Unt i
lyou
camealong.IknewIlikedyouthemomenty ouwal kedintomyof fi
ce.Theagr eementwast hat
wheneverIfeelt
hatwayaboutsomeonet henIshoul dtel
lSazi.ButthenIl
ikedy ou.Istil
ldo.
Andthethoughtofyoudoingwhatal l
theot hergirl
sdid,t
erri
fi
edme.Whati fyoual soli
kedhim
more?Whati ft
hisfr
eakedy ououtandy ourun?ThenIdeci dedt okeepyout omy selfforawhile.
Iwasplanningoncomi ngcl
eanlastnight.Idi
dn’tmeant odeceiveanyofy ouact uall
y.
”

“Wow.Howi
sitpossi
blet
hent
hatSazi
alsometmeatt
hesamet
imeasy
ou?
”

“WhenImety out hef i

rstti
me.Ihonestl
ywasj usthelpi ngy ou.Butt hen,Icoul
dn’tgety ououtof
myhead.Funnyenoughawhi l
ebackMoandIhadaconv ersat i
onaboutwhoshoul dfindhera
femal epartner .Shehadsai dIshoulddoit,thatwayi twoul dbesomeoneI ’
m att
ractedt oas
wel l
.Ijustnev err eall
ywant edtobeinvolvedbutshei nsi stedonmebei ngpartoftheménageà
troi
s.Whi chf ormer eall
ydidn’
tdomuch.Iwasnev err eal l
yi nterest
ed.ThenImeety ou.Fort he
fi
rsttimei nmyl i
feIhav ethesefeeli
ngsforsomeoneel se.IknewIneededt otellMo, thatwas
ouragr eementaf terall
.Butthenwhatifshedoesn’ tlikey ou?ThatmeansIwoul dhavet olet
yougo?Iwasn’ treadyf ort
hat.Fi
ndingouty ourexwasMaseel a'
ssonwasr eal
lyacoi ncidence.
Theny ourprotect ionbecamemor eprevalentandt hatcompl i
catedt hi
ngs.Isti
l
lwant edy ou
wi t
hsamei ntensi tyIdidMoandt hatmadet hingsev enmor ecompl icat
ed.”

“
Whati
sity
ouwantf
rom me?
”Ihadani
deabutIcoul
dbewr
ong.

“
Wewanty
ou,
”Mondeanswer
s.

“
Any
wayy
oucanhav
eus,
it’
supt
oyou,
”shecont
inues.

“
Hav
eyoudi
scussedt
his?
”

“
Yeswehav
eandwehav eourr
ulesbutwewantt
ogi
vey
ouachancet
odeci
dei
fit
’ssomet
hing
y
ouwant
.Nopressur
e.”

“
Ineedt
othi
nkaboutt
hisandwhati
tent
ail
s.CanIasky
ousomet
hing?
”Mondenods.

“
wheny
ousayIcanhav
eyouhowev
erIwant
.Doest
hatmeanIcanseey
ouonsepar
ate
occasi
ons?
”

“
Ideal
l
ywewoul
dpr
efert
obeal
ltoget
herbuti
fit
’swhaty
oupr
efert
heny
oucan,
”Monde
r
esponds.

“
Ihav
eal
ott
othi
nkabout
.Ial
sohav
emor
equest
ionsbutt
hosecanwai
t.
”Ist
andt
ogo.

“MondemayIspeaktoyou,
”Iask.Shenodsandf
oll
owsmeupt
omyr
oom.Oncewear
einI
cl
osethedoorandwalkupt
oher .

“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
his?
”Iask.

“
Yes.
”Ther
eisnodoubti
nhert
one.

“
All
ofi
t.Bei
ngwi
thy
ouandy
ourman?
”

“I
’
mver
ysur
e.Thequest
ioni
sar
eyousur
e?”

“Ihaven’
tdeci
dedyetbutIwantthis,
”Isaypul l
inghert
owardsme.Ourli
psmeetandall
my
mor ni
ngarousal
isrenewed.Shecanf eelmyneedandt akeschar
ge.Sheki
ssesmeeverywher
e
unti
l I
’
m abubbli
ngbeggingmess.Byt hetimeshegoesbet weenmylegswit
honefl
ickofher
tongueIfal
lapar
t.Shedoesn’tl
etupunt i
lIreachmysecondorgasm.

Sheleav
esmet ot
akeashowerbymy
sel
f.Ir
eal
i
seIdi
dn’
tev
enr
etur
nthef
avourbutshewas
al
readygone.

AftermyshowerIdeci
detopackupandleav
e.Ther
eisnot
hinki
ngthatwi
l
lbedonei
nthi
s
house.Ineedmyownspace.Thepossi
bil
i
tyi
sexci
ti
ngImustsay.

If
indSazi
alonedownst
air
sandhet
ell
smeMondehadt
ofet
chsomedocument
sfr
om t
he
of
fice.

“
I’
m goi
ngbackt
omyhouse.Ineedt
othi
nkcl
ear
ly,
”It
ell
him.
“
Asexpect
ed.Whendoy
ouwantt
oseet
heki
ds?
”

“Tomorr
ow.I’
m noti
nt heri
ghtf
rameofmi
ndf
ort
oday
.”Henods.I
t’
shar
dtor
eadhi
m.Hei
s
backtohiscl
osed-
offself
.

“Letmedri
veyouhome.”Hetakesmybagfr
om meandleadsmetohiscar.Wedri
vei
nsil
ence
unti
lwegettomyplace.Oncehepar
kshedoesn’
tshowanyi
ndi
cat
ionthathewantst
ocomein.

“Thankyoufort
heri
de.
”I’
m nerv
ous.Wi t
hMondeI ’
m conf
identandshei
sclearwit
hher
emotionsbutwi
thSazi
Ifeell
i
keI’m backtosquar
eone.Idon’tknowwher
ehei sorwhathe
thi
nks.It
’si
mpossi
blet
oreadhim.

“
Mywi
fei
sinl
ovewi
thy
ou.
”It
’sast
atement
.“Don’
thur
ther
.”That
’sacommand.

“
Whataboutme,
whati
fshei
stheonewhohur
tsme?
”

“
Shewon’
tint
ent
ional
l
yhur
tyou.
”

“
Ial
sowon’
tint
ent
ional
l
yhur
ther
.Icar
eforherdeepl
y.
”

“
Iknow.That
’swhatscar
esmeandhar
dlyany
thi
ngscar
esme.Youri
nnocenceandher
i
ntensi
ty.
”

Whatdoest
hatmean?Doeshet
hinkI
’
m notr
eadyf
ort
hiski
ndofar
rangement
?

Chapt
er18

“
Iwal
konwat
er
ButIai
n'
tnoJesus

Iwal
konwat
er

Butonl
ywheni
tfr
eezes(
fuck)

Why
,ar
eex
pect
ati
onssohi
gh?
”-Emi
nem f
tBey
once

“
Mnt
ungwa”

“
Mh,
”hi
svoi
cei
sst
il
lful
lofsl
eepbutIknowhei
sawake.

“
Whyareyousoangry
?”Iask.Heisly
ingonhi
sst
omachwi thhi
sheadresti
ngonhisar
ms.He
t
urnshi
sheadt
ofaceme.Hehasaf r
ownonhisf
orehead.Ther
ehasneverbeenasexi
erman
t
hanthi
sone.I
’mlyi
ngonmy sidebal
anci
ngmyheadonmyhand.

“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”

“Comeonbabycutt hebul
l
.Iknowy ou.Youaresi
mmeringwithanger
.Sinceyouf
oundLona
andIinthehouse.
”HeisquietandIknowhewon’tsayanythi
ngifhedoesn’
twantto.Iwon’
t
push.“
Youarealsotaki
ngoutyourangeronthewrongperson.
”

“
Mo.I
t’
stooear
lyf
ory
out
obeanal
ysi
ngme.
”

“I
’
m not.Ij
ustwantt
ofi
gureoutwher
eyourmi
ndi
sat
.”Ir
unmyhandonhi
sjaw.Hecl
oseshi
s
eyesasift
osavourt
hetouch.

“
Mo,
”hegr
oans.

“Tal
ktomelove,
”Iwhi
sperclosert
ohim.Ihav
emysuspi
cionsbutInev
erl
i
ket
oassume.
Assumpt
ionsareamotheroffuck-
ups.

“
Ihav
eal
otonmymi
nd.
”
“
Like?
”IknowI
’
m pushi
ng.Wi
thSazi
att
imesy
ouhav
eto.

“
Like,
howmuchIl
ovey
ou.
”Iknowt
hisbuthei
sbei
ngev
asi
ve.

“
Ilov
eyout
ooKhumal
o.Wi
thev
ery
thi
ngi
nme.
”Hi
ssl
eepyey
esopent
oint
ensel
yst
areatme.

“Youareawarethatwearenavi
gatingunchart
edterr
it
ory
,right
?”hesaysaf t
erawhile.Isi
gh.
Thisar
rangementismorecomplicatedthanwhatwe’vet
riedbefor
e.It
’snotaboutl
ikeorev en
sex.I
t’
smor e.I
’
mi nlov
e.I
’minlovewi t
ht wopeopl
eanditscarestheshitoutofme.

From t
hemomentLonast eppedintomyof f
iceforherfir
stinter
viewIknewf rom t
hem thatI
wasscrewed.Il
oveever
ythingabouther.Herconfi
dence, hercurves,herey
es,hersmile.Ij
ust
wanttomakehersmileal
l t
het i
me.Herlaughisinfect
ious.Herhear tispur
e.Sheiskind,giv
ing
andgenui
ne.Herhonest
yisr ef
reshi
ng.Butmost l
ysheget sme.Shecanbev ul
nerabl
ewi thme
andIcanbethesamewi t
hher .Sheteasesmeandmakesf unofmyser i
ousself
.Iloveit.

“FuckMo!Lookatyou.Youareint
oodeep.Whati
fshewon’
tret
urny
ourfeel
i
ngs.What
happensi
fshedoesn’twantt
hisar
rangement
?”hei
ssit
ti
ngupnowrest
inghi
sbackonthe
headboar
dandIdot hesame.

“
Thenwel
ethergo.
”Hel
ooksaway
.Cr
ap.“
Youar
einl
ovewi
thhert
oo?
”het
ri
est
obr
ushi
tof
f.

“Youarear
en’
tyou.Behonestwit
hmebabe.Honest
yal
way s.That’
swhatwepromisedeach
other
.Wemighthavest
ray
edlatel
ybuty
ouknowourrel
ati
onshipthri
vesonhonest
y.”Hesi
ghs.

“
Ili
keher
.Al
ot.
”

“Thenwhatdoy
ousuggestwedo?
”

“If
earsheisnotr
eadyfort
his.Shei
stooinnocent,youngandnaive.Shemightj
ustbecuri
ous
andnothi
ngmore.Thenwhathappenswhenshel osesint
erestorr
eali
sest
hatit’
snotwhatshe
wants?
”

“
Thenwel
ethergo.
”Ir
eit
erat
ewi
thsur
etyt
hatdef
iest
hei
nneri
nsecur
evoi
ce.
“Yout
hinkitwi
l
lbet
hatsimple?
”No.Idon’
tthi
nkso.Thati
smyf
ear
.Thi
sisdi
ff
erent
.Feel
i
ngs
arei
nvolv
edandwhenfeel
ingsarei
nvol
vedpeopl
egethurt
.

“
Promi
semeonet
hingSazi
.”Het
akesmyhandi
nhi
sandcl
aspi
tver
yti
ght
.

“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
oumyl
ove.
”

“
Ifatanypoi
nty
oudon’
twantt
hisory
ouwanti
ttost
op,
sayt
hewor
d.I
twi
l
lbeov
er.
”

“
Ipr
omi
se.
”

“
Idon’
tknowwhatIdidtodeserveamanli
keyou.Idon’
ttakeyouforgr
antedmylov
e.Youare
mylov
e,myhear
t.”Icanfeelmysel
fbei
ngover
comebyemot i
ons.Hesnakeshi
shandaround
myneckandpul
l
smecl osert
ohim.

“Youaremyhear
t.Now.Whyar
ewebei
ngsoser
ioussoear
lyi
nthemor
ning?
”Hepl
ant
sasof
t
kissonmyli
ps.

“Idon’tl
ikeseei
ngy ouunhappy.ImeanIdi
dn’
tev
engetanyl
ovi
ngl
astni
ght
.”Hepul
l
sme
closerandI’
m halfontopofhim.

“
Icanrect
if
ythat
.”Hepul
l
smyl
egov
erhi
shar
der
ect
ionandmyqui
m qui
ver
s.Il
etoutasof
t
moan.

“Baby,ohmy .What ’
sthis?”Iwr apmyhandar oundandgent l
est r
okehi m.Hel etsoutal i
tt
le
moan.“ DoesMnt ungwar equireal itt
leat tenti
on?Fi rsttel
lme.Doy ouenj oywat chi
ngmeand
Lonabei nginti
mat e.
”Hej erksandbecomeshar der.“noneedt oanswert hat.Ihavemy
responser i
ghthere,”Iemphasi semypoi ntbyst rokinghim harder.Hisbr eathinghasescal ated.
“Domeaf avour,easeuponher .Stopt akingouty ourangerorwhat everaggr essionsy ouhave.
Wecanr edir
ectitsomewher eel se.Likeher eforinstance.”Iguidehi sti
pt omywar m sheath.
Whenhemakescont acthef l
ipsmeov erandsi nksi ntome.Thenhegi vesmeapoundi ngofmy
l
ife.Hegi v
esittomegood.Ev ent hought sofLonaar eobli
terat
edoutofmymi nd.He
consumesmeandatt hismomentnot hingmat t
er sandnoonemat tersbuthi m.
Heissti
l
lburi
eddeepi
nsi
demewithmylegsl
ockedaroundhiswai
st.Ourbodi
esarecov
eredi
n
sweat
.Hisbodyi
ssofl
ushedagai
nstmi
neIcanli
ter
all
yfeel
hiserr
ati
cheartbeat
.

“Iloveyou,
”Isay.Helowershisheadandcapturesmylipsi
nasweatsensualki
ss.If
eelital
l
thewayt omysoul .Thehepullsback.Whenhelooksatme.Inthatmomentheisopened.Ican
seehi sl
oveforme.Hi sdesir
e,hi
sfears.Hi
seyesaretr
ulyawindowtohi
ssoul.Myheart
clenches.DoIreal
lydeservehisl
ove?Iwonder.

Awhi
l
elat
erIf
indhi
mint
heki
tchenmaki
ngbr
eakf
ast
.

“Areyoucomingwi
tht
oBheki '
sfar
m? ”heasksplaci
ngacupofcof
feenextt
ome.Isi
tont
he
highchai
rsandwat
chhim cook.Heisagreatcookunli
keme.Iempl
oypeopl
efort
hat
.

“I’
m notsur
e.Ifeel
y ouneedtohavesometi
mewi thLona.Youhaven’tspentt
imetoget
her
si
ncethereveal
.Thiswil
lonlyworki
fweall
getalong.
”Hekeepsqui etandcontinueswi
thhi
s
cooki
ng.Aft
erdishi
nguphej oi
nmeandweenj oyhisdeli
ciousbr
eakfast.

“
Iwanty
out
ocome.
”I’
m st
art
ledbyt
hatbecausei
tcomesoutofnowher
e.

“
Okay
.”Justaswefini
shourbr
eakf
astmyf
athercal
l
s.Iwantt
oignor
ehi
scal
lbutSazi
giv
es
meapoint
edlook.

“Hel
l
odaddy
”

“
Whatmustaf
atherdot
oseet
hei
rchi
l
d?”heasks.

“Not
hingdaddy
.I’
vebeenbusy.
”Notr
eall
yIj
ustbeenav
oidi
nghi
scall
slat
ely
.Ifit
’snotabout
hisl
egacyi
t’
saboutSazimaki
nganhonestwomanoutofme.Orgi
vi
nghim grandkids.

“
Tel
lyourmant
hent
hatI
’
minv
iti
ngy
ouov
erf
orl
unch,
”hei
nst
ruct
s.
“
Wehav
epl
ansf
orl
unchdaddy
.”

“
Dinnert
hen.Thi
sisnotnegot
iabl
e.Seey
ouat7shar
p.”Hehangsup.Isi
gh.

“Arewecommandedtotheroyalhouse,
”hesmi l
esathi
sownjoke.Ihatet
hesef
amil
ydinner
s.
Inevert
oldmyfat
heraboutwhathappenedsohehashisexpect
ati
onsofmeastheheirtohi
s
l
egacy.Heisal
sounderthei
mpressionthati
t’
sSaziwhodoesn’
twanttomakeanhonest
womanoutofme.

Atf
ir
stIdi
dn’
ttel
lhi
m becauseIwasn’
treadyt
obutnowIfeelal
otofti
mehadpassedandthat
hemightf
eel
betr
ayedbymynondisclosur
e.Honest
ly,
howdoesaparenthandl
esuchnews?

“
Ihat
eitwhenhegi
vesy
ouahar
dti
me.
”

“Icanhandl
eyourf
ather
,Mo.I
t’
syouIwor
ryabout
.”

“
I'
llbefi
ne.Anot
heri
ssuei
sthatIwonderi
fwewil
lbebacki
nti
mef orthedinner
.Lonami
ght
wanttospendmoret
imewit
hthekids.Howist
hesit
uat
ionwi
ththeNigeri
ans?”

“Inev
erthoughtIwoul
dhav etodealwi
tht
heMaseel
a’
sev
ent
hinki
ngaboutt
hem makesme
thi
nkoft
hingsIhadthoughtIbur
ied.
”

“
Iknow.Nev
ert
houghtwewoul
dcr
osspat
hsagai
n.”

“Anyway .Apparent
lyTsiet
siisi
nhidi
ng.WhatI’
m notsurei
swhyhedoesn’ taskf
orhi
sfather'
s
help.ImeanI ’
m surethatoldsonofabit
chstil
lhassomealli
ancesthatcoul
dhel
p.Andifit
wasn’tforLonaandherki ds,Iwoul
ddefi
nit
elynotbeinv
olv
edi nthi
sshit
.”

“Iknowbabe.Unf
ort
unat
elywearei
nvolv
ed.Wejusthav
et oseei
tthr
oughandt
hatt
her
ear
e
nocomebacks.I
fwehavetogotowarthensobeit.
”Helooksatmesharpl
y.

“
It
’st
heonl
ylanguaget
hesepeopl
eunder
stand,
”Icont
inue.
“Idon’
twantyouandLonainvol
vedi
nt hisbabe.Theyshoul
dn’
tevenknowyouexi
st.I
nfactI
don’twantany
thi
ngconnecti
ngustothis.Let
’sleav
ethem t
osolv
et hei
rownmadness.”

“Doy
out
hinknoonesuspect
sthaty
ouwer
einv
olv
edi
nrescui
ngt
heki
ds?
”

“No.Idon’
tthi
nkso.Wecov er
edourtracksv er
ywell
.”Iwoul
dhavelovedtoseehimi nact
ion
though.Nothi
ngissexi
ert
hanSaziwithagun.Ishakemyheadasi ftolit
eral
lycl
earmy
way wardt
houghts.“
Whateveryouarethinki
ngisnotgoodandwedon’ thaveti
mef ort
hat.We
needtogetgoing.Cal
lLi
na.
”Ismileandpi ckupmyphonet ocal
lher.

“
Hey
.”Herv
oicei
shusky
.

“
Goodmor
ning.Howdi
dyousl
eep,
”I’
mlooki
ngatSazi
asIspeak.

“Ihardl
yslept
.Ihav
ealotonmymi nd.
”Ihavebut
ter
fl
iesf
loat
ingi
nmyst
omach.HowIwi
shI
couldpickherbrai
n.Fi
ndoutwhatshe’
sthi
nki
ng.

“
Arey
our
eadyt
oseet
heki
ds?
”

“
Def
ini
tel
y,
”herv
oiceper
ksup.“
Whenar
ewel
eav
ing?
”

“
Wewi
l
lbeaty
ourpl
acei
n20mi
nut
es.
”

“
Shar
p.”Shehangsup.

“
Shei
sready
.”Hi
sst
arei
sint
ense.Hedoest
hatwhenhe’
str
yingt
ofi
gur
emeout
.

“
Howi
sshe?
”heasks.
“
Probabl
yov
ert
hinki
ngher
sel
ftoexhaust
ion.Shesoundst
ir
edbutshei
sexci
tedaboutseei
ng
t
hekids.
”

“Shehasalottothi
nkofandIthi
nkshehasmor equest
ionst
hananswers.Ifeelitwoul
dhave
beenbett
erifshehasaskedal
lthequesti
onst
henwentandthoughtaboutthis.
”Wear ebot
hon
ourfeetget
tingwhatev
erwewi l
lneedfort
het
rip.

“
Doy
out
hinkshewi
l
lref
use,
”Ican’
thi
demyanxi
ety
.

“Tobehonest
,Idon’
tknow.
”It
’sal
otf
orsomeonet
ohandl
e.Iknowaswel
lthati
t’
snotf
or
ever
yone.

Wear
egoi
ngt
hroughsecur
it
ycl
ear
anceathermai
ngat
e.

“I
’m gl
ady ougotthi
splaceforher.I
t’
ssafer.Shewastoovulnerableinthathouse.”I
tdi
dn’t
surpri
semet hathedidall
ofthatforLona.Heisalway
sgiving.Buti tal
sogivesmean
i
ndicati
onofhowhef eel
sabouther.Eventhoughheishidi
ngi t,hecaresdeeply.Havi
nghim
admittofeeli
ngasdeeplyforherashedoesmei sacl
earindicationofthedepthofhisfeel
ings.

Wear
ecur
rent
lypar
kedi
nfr
ontofheruni
t.

“
Aren’
tyougoi
ngt
ocal
lher
?”heasks.

“
Ithoughtmay
bey
oushoul
dgof
etchher
.

“
ComeonMo,
justcal
lher
.”

“
Arey
ouact
ual
l
yav
oidi
ngbei
ngal
onewi
thher
?”hesi
ghsandget
soutoft
hecar
.

Afewminuteslatertheywalkoutoft heuni
t.Thereseem tobenoconv er
sati
onbetweenthe
two.Myworryisthem notgetti
ngalong.I
tcouldruinourchancesofthi
sarrangementwor
king
evenbef
oreitbegins.Igetoutoft
hecarandgi veLonaahug.Shel ooksverysexyi
nherli
me
greenpr
intedl ong,f
lowydress.I
t’
sonlyhel
dinpl
acebyst
ri
ngsar
oundherneck.Shesmel
l
s
heavenl
y.IinhaleherscentasIprol
ongthehug.

“Yousmel lwonderful
,
”Iwhisperagai
nstherear.Ihearal
itt
lemoanescapi nghermouth.Ican’
t
helpit
.Ipullherheadtowardsmineandcaptureherlipsi
nanintensekiss.Sheisn’
texpect
ing
thatasIfeelherbodytenseforasecondandt hensheisint
oit.Sheret
urnsitwithfer
vour.

Thesoundofadoorcl
osi
ngbringsusbacktooursenses.Hercheeksarefl
ushedr
edandI
’
m
sur
emi ner
efl
ectt
hesame.Iholdthedooropenf
orherwhileshegetsin.

Oncewear
eal
li
nSazi
star
tst
hecar
.Wedr
ivei
nsi
l
encef
orawhi
l
ewi
thhi
m concent
rat
ingon
dr
ivi
ng.

“I
sitpossi
blet
ogopasst
hemal
l
?Iwantt
obuyt
heki
dsaf
ewt
hings,
”Lonaasks.It
hinki
tsa
goodidea.

Twohoursl
aterwewalkoutoft
hemal
lwi
tht
woov
erf
lowi
ngt
rol
l
eys.Wemi
ghthav
egoneabi
t
over
boar
dbutwedon’tcar
e.

Sazitakesextr
acar
et ogetust
oBheki
’shouse.Ihav
en’
tseent
hem i
nawhi
l
eandIhav
e
missedt hem.Weeventual
l
yarri
veatt
hei
rhouse.

Saneisshockedt
oseemeandLonat
oget
herbutdoesn'
tsayany
thi
ngj
ustgi
vesmeahugand
thenLona.

“Jamakoti
.Wher
ethef
uckhav
eyoubeenhi
dingy
our
sel
f?”t
hat
’sBheki
’
swayofgr
eet
ingmeas
heenvel
opsmeinashug.

“
Wor
khasmebyt
het
it
s,”Isayr
etur
ningt
heembr
ace.

“
Forf
uckssakes.Whydoy
ouev
enhav
eand8t
o5j
ob?
”Hel
etsgo.

“
Ilov
emyj
ob.
”Hemov
esont
oLona.
“Sdudla.Aren’
tIget
ti
ngsomelove?
”Lonaseemstobebetweenannoy
edandamused.
Eventuall
ysheretur
nsthehugandweall
moveinsi
dethehouse.

OnceBhekiandSanearer
eadywetakedi
ffer
entcar
stot
heair
str
ip.Therear
eaf ewguyswit
h
conceal
edweaponsaccompany
ingus.Every
onemakessur
ethatwear enotbei
ngfol
lowed.

Wear enowonboar dtheair

craf
tSazii
sseat
ingwi
thBhekii
nsomeseemi ngl
ydeep
conversat
ion.I
’
m seat
ingnexttoSanewit
hLonaopposi
teus.Thi
sisnotabigjet
.It
’sa12si
tt
er
wit
habedr oom andbathr
oom.

“
Soy
out
woknoweachot
her
,”Saneasks.

“
Yes,
we’
vemet
,”Isayr
aisi
ngmyey
ebr
owschal
l
engi
nghert
ogof
urt
her
.Herf
rowndeepens.

“Ineedtospeakt oyoupri
vat
ely,
”shesaystome.Shedoesn’
twai
tformyrepl
ysheunbuckl
es
herseatbeatandgetsupwalkingtowardst
hebedroom.If
oll
owher.Oncet
her
esheturnsgo
mewi t
haconcer nedlookonherface.

“
Howmuchdoy
ouknowaboutt
hisgi
rl
?”I
’
m assumi
ngshemeansLona.

“
Alotact
ual
l
y.Shewor
ksf
orme.
”

“
Shedoes?
”shocki
sappar
entonherf
ace.

“
Yes.
”

“Thi
sismoreser i
ousthanIt
hought
.Donottr
ustt
hisgi
rl
.It
hinkshei
saft
ery
ourman.Thelast
ti
met heywereheresheseemedtofami
l
iarwit
hhi
m.Iblamemybr ot
herf
ort
his.Youneedt
o
speaktohim abouti
t.
”

“
Ihav
eandwe’
vesor
tedi
tout
.”
“
Youhav
e?”

“
Yes.Ever
ythi
ngisf
ine.I
’
m awar
eofwhathappenedandwe’
vewor
kedt
hroughi
t.
”Shei
snow
moreconf
usedthanever.

“Ohwell
.I’
m gl
ad.I
t’
sjustt
haty
ouseem cool
bei
ngar
oundher
.Asl
ongasy
ouknowt
henIf
eel
bet
ter
.”

Whenwearedonet
alki
ngwegobacktof
indLonabusywit
hherphone.Themomentwesit
downBheki
comesandtakeshi
swi
feaway.Leav
ingt
hetwoofusinsil
enceunt
ilSazi
comest
o
j
oinus.

“
Arey
ouexci
tedaboutseei
ngt
heki
ds?
”hedi
rect
sthequest
iont
oLona.

“
Ja.Iam.I
’
venev
erbeenawayf
rom t
hem f
ort
hisl
ong.Imi
ssedt
hem.
”

“Icanimagi ne.Soony ou’l

lseethem, I
’
m suret heycan’twaittoseey out oo.
”Hi
stoneismor e
softer.Justthenwehearasoundofsomet hingfall
ingont heotherside.Iknowthosetwoare
havingsexi nthere.It
’ssuchashor tfl
ight,r
eallycouldn’
ttheywait?Atleastsomeonei s
rel
easingt hetension.Ifwecouldonlydot hesameaswel l.It
’sevi
dentthatwear eall
thi
nking
abouti tbutnoonewi l
lmakeamov eunt i
lLonahasdeci dedandi nformedusofherdecision.
Wel ist
ent othesoundsoft hem bangi
ngagai nstthedoor.Ilookupt ofindSazit
ryi
ngtoholdhis
l
aught er.Ican’
thelpitIburstoutlaughingandt heybothjoinme.

“
Thi
sjeti
swayt
oosmal
lfort
his?
”hesay
saf
terourl
aught
erhasdi
esdown.

“Iknowandtot hinkthethr
eeofuscouldbedoingt
hesame,”Lonasays.Webothl
ookather.I
knowshedidn’tmeanf ort
hatt
ocomeoutbyt hewayshecan’tmeetourey
es.Ourshockather
outbur
sti
sinterruptedbythepi
lotannounci
ngourl
andi
ng.

Afewminutesl
aterthel
ovebir
dsemergefrom t
hebedroom l
ooki
ngqui
etdi
shev
ell
ed.Theyseat
wher
ethetwoboy shasi
niti
all
ysatst
il
lal
l
-overeachot
her.

Themomentwelandther
earet
wocarsalr
eadywait
ingt
odr
iveust
othef
arm.Thet
hreeofus
geti
nonecar
.Theairi
sthi
ckwi
thsexual
tensi
on.
Themomentwegett othefarmthatallevaporat
esasweseet hekids.Theyruntothei
rmom
themomenttheyspother
.Shegoesonherkneesandenv el
opesthem bothinherarms.I
t’
s
mayhem af
terwar
ds.Theyaretal
kingnon-stop,atthesametime.Ononesi deSane'
skidsare
makingt
heirownnoiseasweal l
walkintothemai nhouse.

WhatIwoul
dgi
vet
ohav
ethatki
ndofat
tent
ionf
rom al
i
ttl
ehuman.Si
gh.

“
Pennyf
ory
ourt
hought
s,”i
t’
sSazi
hol
dingmef
rom behi
nd.If
eel
thebal
anceagai
n.

“Justlookingandenv yi
ngthisuncondi ti
onallove.
”Hishol dti
ghtensandheki ssesthesideof
myneckaswewat cht hepar entsplaywi t
hthei
rkids.JustthenNt hati
sirunstowardsusand
grabsbot hofourhandsi nhert inyhandsandpul l
sust ojointhem.Wej oi
nthem ont heflooras
shesitsonmyl ap.Theyar eani mat edi
nt hei
rstorytel
li
ng.It’
shardt oevengetawor din.Ican
tel
lthattheyar ehavingagr eatt ime.Thingsbecomewor sewhenwegi vethem thei
rtoys.There
i
smor eact i
onandnoi seint hishouset hanaday -
carecent r
e.Ther oom isfi
ll
edwithwar mth,
l
aught erandl ove.Thisishowl i
feismeantt obe.

Chapt
er19

“
Sowe’
l
lpi
ssof
fthenei
ghbour
s

I
nthepl
acet
hatf
eel
sthet
ear
s

Thepl
acet
olosey
ourf
ear
s

Yeah,
reckl
essbehav
ior

Apl
acet
hati
ssopur
e,sodi
rt
yandr
aw

I
nthebedal
lday
,bedal
lday
,bedal
lday

Fucki
ngi
nandf
ight
ingon

I
t’
sourpar
adi
seandi
t’
sourwarzone

I
t’
sourpar
adi
seandi
t’
sourwarzone

Pi
l
lowt
alk

Myenemy
,myal
l
y

Pr
isoner
s

Thenwe’
ref
ree,
it’
sat
hinl
i
ne”
-Zay
nMal
i
k
It
’sMondaymor ni
ngandI
’
mt ir
edasfuck.Wegothomeear l
yhoursofthemorni
ng.Icouldn’
t
l
etgoofmyki ds.Wehadtowaitunt
ilt
heyhadfinal
lysuccumbedtoexhaust
ionandfall
en
asleept
oleav
e.EvenwhentheywereasleepIst
ruggledtopartwi
ththem.

Ican’twai
tforthi
stobeoversothatIcanhavemybabiesback.Atthi
smomentI’
m get
ti
ng
readyforworkbutmybodyisref
usingtocooper
ate.Twoconsecuti
venight
sofnosl
eepisnot
ajoke.Especi
all
ybecauseIl
ovemysl eep.

Thi
nkingofthepr
oposal
tojoi
nthetwointhei
runi
onhaslef
tmymi ndspinni
ng.Imustadmit
I
’mtemptedbutmysanitypul
l
smei ncheckever
yti
me.Thisi
sdangerousterr
it
oryt
owalkint
o.
Thetwoloveeachot
herandIdon’
tseehowhav i
ngmeinthepict
urewil
lhelpanyofus.

Let
’ssayIdoagr eetothi
stemptati
on,whathappenswhenoneofusf all
sinlovewi ththeot her
?
Tobecl ear,whathappensifIwantSazitomyselforMondet
omy sel
f.You’
llneverknowahear t
i
sav erytreacherousorgan.Orwhatift
heybothtir
eofmeandIst il
lwantthem?Wi l
lIturnintoa
psychothatstalksthem?Ifthi
ngsturnsourwhatwill
becomeofmywor ki
ngr el
ati
onshi p?
Unanswer edquestionsfi
lt
erunobst
ruct
edthroughmyhead.Ndizophambanast raight!

Butthenmyinnervoicealwaysremindsmeoft hepossi
bil
it
ies.You’
l
lhavet hebestofbot
h,
she’l
lsay
.Thi
nkhowmi ndblowi
ngi twi
llbe.MondeandSazi bothpl
easuringyou?Sheisahoe
thisonewecan’
treallyr
easonwi t
hher.Buttheni
fit
’saboutsexwhynot .Ionlyl
iveoncemoss.
Itcoul
dbeanexperienceofalif
etime.Howmanypeopl ecancl ai
mtohav edonesuch.

Someonewi l
lgethurt.Doesn’
tlif
ecomewi thsuchthough?Therearenoguaranteesofasafe
hearti
nanysituati
on.PlusI’
l
lbewal ki
ngintherewit
hmyheadandnotmyhear t.I’
m surewit
h
them i
t’
sabouttheirsexualf
antasiesanddesir
e.Theybothhaveeachother’
sheartsisn’
t?I
t’
sa
win-wi
nforeveryone.Igett
ol i
veoutmyf ant
asyandt heygett
ohavetheir
s.Oncei t
’soverwe
partways.Noneedt ocomplicatethi
ngs.

Thi
shasbeenmyi
nter
nal
bat
tl
efort
hepastt
woday
s.

I
’
mfinal
lydressedandreadyt
ogo.Myhairhasbeent
heult
imatebat
tl
e.Thi
saf
roi
snoteasi
l
y
t
amed.Ineedtoplantmyweavesoon.Atl
eastt
hescarhasheal
edabit
.

IwishIcanspeaktoLal
aaboutt hi
ssi t
uationbutIthinkshehasherowni ssuestodealwith.I
’m
worri
edabouther.Thef
ewt imesIev ent
ual l
ywasabl etogethol dofhershesoundedhappy .
Toohappyi fy
ouaskme.Af terwhathappenedI ’
vebecomewar yofherbehaviour
.Ifshecan
hidewhat’
sbeenhappeningtoherf orsolongwhatel seisshecapabl eofdoing?Thestori
esof
womenbei ngkil
l
edbytheirpart
nersareonev erymediaplatfor
m.Whi chmakesmewonderi f
I’
m doi
ngenoughasaf ri
end.Idecidetogov i
sitheruni
nvitedafterwork.

Igett oworkatthesamet i
measev er
yone.Imustadmi t
,I’
m avoi
dingbeingalonewithMonde.
I’
m still
intwomi ndsaboutt
hisproposal
.HeyI’m awomanI ’m al
lowedtobei ndeci
siv
e.Ifi
nd
Fisiwebusyont hephoneandf r
om whatIhearit’
sweekendgossi p.Af
terIloginonmysy stem I
checkf orworkthatisur
gentandalsoMonde’sdiary.Shehastwomeet ingsshehasn’t
conf i
rmedandoneoft hoserequir
ehertoflytoDurban.Igoknockonherof fi
ceandIheara
faintcomei n.WhenIwalkinIfi
ndherbusyonherl aptop.Sheli
ft
sherey esasIwalkin.Icl
ose
thedoorbehi
ndmeandwalktowardsherdesk.Herey
esar
eappr
aisi
ngmef
rom headt
otoe
andbackagainl
eav
ingat
rai
loffheatal
lover.

“
Goodmor
ningMsNduna,
”Igr
eet
.Herey
essnapt
omi
neandt
heheatont
hem i
stel
l
ing.

“
Whysof
ormal
?”shepur
rs.Icl
earmyt
hroat
.

“
Justbei
ngprofessi
onal
.”Shehesi
tat
esforafewsecondsandthenherwal
l
sar
eup.Boss
MondeisbackandIfeelafri
ssonofawar
enessal
ongmyspi ne.

“Whatdoy ouhav
ef orme?”justl
ikethatweareinwor kmode.Unfortunat
elyt
hei
nfernoinsi
de
i
sbuil
dingasIwatchherlipsmov easshespeaks.Thewayherdel icatehandsmoveacrossthe
key
boardasshet ypesorpointsonthescreen.Herscenti
soverpower i
ngmysenses.I’
mi na
per
petualstat
eofneed.

“Cancelt
heDur
banmeet i
ngandtr
yt oschedul
eaconf er
encecall
.Ift
heycan’
treschedul
efor
anothert
imemaybenextweek.
”Ijotever
ythi
ngshesay swit
hshakyhands.Oncewear edone
goingovert
heweekl
yplansIl
eaveheroffi
ce.I
’m onl
yabletobreat
heproperl
ywhenIwal kout
.

I
t’
salmostl
uncht
imeandI’
m huddl
edatmydeskovermycomputertr
yingt
orecor
dsome
document
s.Whenacer
tai
nscentcat
chesmyatt
ent
ion.I
tcan’
tbehim.

“Sani
bonani
.
”Thef
uck!IhearFisi
weclear
inghert
hroatasi
fchoki
ngonhersal
i
va.Myey
es
snapuptofi
ndhi
sstar
ingstrai
ghtatme.

“Gooddaysi r
.Howcanwehel p?”Fi
fiasks.I
’
m stil
ltr
yingt
owr apmyheadaroundthefactthat
heishere.Lookingassexyasfucki
nasl i
mf i
tti
ngblacksui
tandwhi t
eshi
rtnoti
e.I
’m drool
ing.
Fif
iisdr
oolingaf ewotherl
adi
esdownt hehall
wayar esur
elydrool
i
ng.Feel
sli
keamat ing
seasonduringfullmoon.

“
I’
m her
etoseeMsNduna.
”Hei
sst
il
ll
ooki
ngatmeandI
’
mfeel
i
ngv
eryunset
tl
ed.

“Oh.Youcancheckwi
thherPAi
fshei
sav
ail
abl
e.”Shel
ooksatmeasi
ftopr
omptmei
nto
acti
on.

“
WhomustIsayi
sher
etoseeher
?”Iaskwhi
l
epi
cki
ngupt
hephone.

“
Sazi
Khumal
o,”hedr
awl
s.Mondepi
cksup.

“
MsNdunat
her
eisaMrKhumal
otoseey
ou.
”I’
m sur
pri
sedIst
il
lhav
emyspeechi
nor
der
.

“
Khumal
ofr
om wher
e?”shei
sgenui
nel
yaski
ng.Iguessshei
sn’
texpect
ingherhusbandt
ovi
sit
.

“
Khumal
ofr
om wher
e?”Idi
rectt
hequest
iont
ohi
m.

“S.
KConsorti
um,”hehashisoneeyebr
owr ai
sed.I
’
m st
ruggl
i
ngt
obr
eat
he.Mondeappar
ent
ly
canhearbecauseshechuckl
esaf
terwards.

“
Sendhi
min.AndLona?
”

“
Yes?
”

“
Youl
ookabsol
utel
yfucki
ngsexyt
oday
!”Mymi
dsect
ioncl
enches.Iqui
ckl
yhangup.
“Thi
swaypleaseMrKhumalo,
”Isayleadi
nghi
mt oMonde’soff
ice.Onlyt
henIr eal
i
set hatheis
carr
yingat
akeawaybagfrom oneofMonde’
sfavour
it
erestaur
ant.Icanfeelhispresence
behi
ndme.WhenIgett ot
hedoorIknockandall
owhimtogot hroughthem closethedoor.Igo
backtomywor kst
ati
ononshakylegs.

“Whoi sthat? ”Fi

siweasksthemomentIsi tatmydesk.“ DamnLonay ouseewi ththatIwould
givehim mycooki eonasil
verpl att
er.Thatmani sdamnsexy .Whyhav en’tweseenhi m befor
e.
Newcl ient?Ifyourbosswasn’ tsoupt i
ghtthiswouldbeanoppor tuni
tyf orhertogethergr oove
on.”Ionlygiv eherasmallsmi l
eassher amblesonaboutSazi ’
ssexappeal .Ev
entuall
yshegoes
onherl unchbr eak.Sodoesev eryoneont hefloor.Peoplehaverecentlygotpai dsono
homemadel unchesforawhi l
e.I’
ml eftal
oneont hefloornotsurewhatt odo.DoIi nterr
upt
them toletherknowI ’
mtakingmyl unchordoIj ustleavewithoutinf
ormi ngher.Idecideto
sendherat ext.JustasIt
ypemyof fi
cephoner i
ngs.

“Lonacoul
dyoupl
easecomeintomyoffice.”Shesayst
hemomentIpi
ckup.Iwalki
ntoher
offi
cetofi
ndt
hem seat
ingonthesof
as.Iclosethedoorbehi
ndmeandl
ockforgoodmeasure.
Mondegetsupandwalkstowardsme.

“Sazi
broughtlunch,
wouldy
oul
i
ket
ojoi
nus?
”Il
ookatSazi
leani
ngcomf
ort
abl
eagai
nstt
he
sofawit
hhisjacketoff
.

“Mm okay
.Thatwi
ll
belovel
y.Thankyou.
”Shetakesmyhandsinhersandpull
smet owar
dst
he
couch.Wear
ebothseat
ingnexttoeachotherf
aci
ngSazi
.Shedishesupforever
yone.

“
Hav
eyouspokent
oaunt
yyet
?Howar
etheki
ds?
”Sazi
asks.

“
Ihav
ebutt
heki
dswer
esl
eepi
ngwhenIcal
l
ed.SoIhav
en’
tspokent
othem y
et.
”

“
Ispoketothehousekeeperear
li
er,
appar
ent
lyt
heywokeupl
ooki
ngf
ory
ou.
”Myhear
tbr
eaks.
Mondetouchesmyt hi
ghtoreassur
eme.

“I
twil
lbeov ersoon.They’
ll
comeback.
”InodmyheadasIf eel
tearspr
ickl
emyey es.Shecan
sensemyemot i
onalstat
eandpul
l
smei nherarmstoholdme.JustwhatIneededasIsi nkint
o
herembrace.Ifeelashif
tbehi
ndmeandthenfeel
Sazi’
shandcaressi
ngmyback.Myst art
s!
Thesetwowi l
lbetheendofme.

“
Lina.
”Hi
srumbl
i
ngv
oicesendst
ingl
i
ngsensat
ionst
hroughoutmybody
.

“
Yes.
”Mondel
etsgo.Het
urnsmear
oundt
ofacehi
m.

“Theywi l
lbebackIpromiseyou,”hi
seyesar
escanningmyf aceashisthumbcaressmyj aw.
I’
m drowninginhiseyes.Heslowlypul
l
smecl oserashisl
ipszoom i
nonmi ne.Weareinches
apartthenIfeelMonde’sbodyfl
ushedagai
nstmi neassheholdsmefrom behi
nd.Thi
sisan
assaulttomysenses.

“Fuck!
”Sazisi
lent
lyswear
sthencapturesmyl ipsinhis.Ican’tputi
ntowordshowIf eelr
ight
now.Mysensesar eonoverl
oad.Histongueduel swithmi nei naneroti
cki
ss.ThenIfeel
Monde’shandscaressmyboobs.I’
ml osingallsense.Mymi ndsisscreami
ngforthem toboth
takeme.Wear eatworkforf
ucksakes!Thatt houghtsnapsmebackt omysenses.Ispri
ngto
myf eetandhasti
l
ywalktowardst
hedoor .JustasI ’
m aboutt oopen.Mondeholdsthedoorand
t
urnsmear
oundt
ofaceherwhi
l
eshecagesmei
n.

“Thatwasn’tmeanttohappen.Don’tf eell
ikeweareput ti
ngpr essur
eony ou.I
t’sj
ustthat,I
supposewebot hmissyou.”Ilookov eratSazi whoisonhi sfeettry
ingtohidehisvi
sibl
ebul ge
andfail
i
ng, di
smally
.Myclitisthrobbing.Whyam Ir unning.I
’
m scar edtodeath.I
’v
enev erfelt
suchfeeli
ngsfortwopeople.It
’sscary .If
eell
ikeI’
m goingtocombust .

“I
tstoomuch,
”Ican’
tev
enr
ecogni
semyownv
oice.Shecupsmyf
acei
nherhands.Theneedi
n
hereyesr
efl
ectmyown.

“
Wewi
l
lst
op,
”shewhi
sper
s.Herf
acei
scl
oset
omi
ne.I
’
m pul
l
inghercl
oser
.

“Idon’
twanty out
o.”I’
m aconf
usedbit
chrightnow.Sazii
sbehi
ndMondealsocagi
ngbot
hof
usin.Shecloseshereyesmomentar
il
y.Iknowexactlyhowshefeel
s.Mypussyi
scl
enchi
ng
repeat
edly
.

Il
ookuptof
indSaziey
esonmywhi
l
ehepl
ant
ski
ssesonMonde’
sneck.If
eel
li
kehei
ski
ssi
ng
methr
oughherasIwhimper
.

“
Whatdoy
ouneed?Tel
lmebaby
.”Monde’
svoi
cei
sthi
ckwi
thar
ousal
.

“You,”Iblurti
tout .Shesmashesherl i
psonmi newhi l
eherhandgoesundermyski r
tinsi
demy
panties.I’
m drenched.Shemoansagai nstmylipswhenshef eel
showwetIam.Imanoeuv r
e
myhandunderherdr essandqui ckl
ypushherpant i
esasidetofi
ndherover f
lowingcanal
.We
playwi t
heachot hersqui mswi thonlyonegoal inmi nd.Geteachot
heroff
.I ’
m soclose.My
wholebodyi sshaking.Shel et
sgoofmyl ipsandbur i
esherheadonthesideofmyneckasshe
fall
sapar ti
nmyhands.Sazi hasawi ldlookonhi sfacewhichsendsmeov ertheedge.Hisneed
i
sbor deringoni nsanity.Mykneesf eelweekasIr idemywav eofor
gasm.MondeandIar e
battl
ingtocat chourbr eat h.West andinthatpositi
onunt i
lwearemorecomposed.Sazi i
sthe
fi
rsttomov eaway .Whi leIperkMondeont hel
ips.

“
Let
’sgofr
eshenupandthenfi
nishourl
unch,
”shemur
mur
sagai
nstmyl
i
ps.Ij
ustnodmyhead.
Webothwalkt
owardsherbat
hroom.

“Idon’
tthi
nkwear
ebei
ngf
aironSaz
i,
”Isay
.Li
ket
hemansur
elyi
ssuf
fer
ingacaseofbl
ue
ball
s.

“
Doy
ouwantt
otakecar
eofhi
m?”sheasks.

“
That’
sthethi
ng.I’
m notsur
ehowtobeinti
matewit
hhi
m withyouaround.I
tfeel
sweir
d.Byt
he
wayIsti
l
lhaven’
tagreedonany
thi
ng.Unt
ilsucht
imeIt
hinkheshoul
dbeof fl
imit
s.”

“Okay.Ir
especthowy ouf
eel
.Don’tworr
yabouthim Ipl
anontaki
ngcareofhi
m.”Shewinks
andquickl
yleavesmei nt
hebathr
oom.If r
eshenupasmuchasIcant henwal
kouttofi
ndthen
seati
ngandcont i
nui
ngwithl
unch.Ij
ointhem andconti
nuewi
thmylunchaswell
.

“Youknowhady ouvisi
tedmeatworkbefor
ethi
swholemisunder
standi
ngwould’
vebeen
avoi
ded.”MondeteasesSazi
.Shei
ssor el
axedandcar
efr
ee.Il
ovethissi
deofher
.

“
Angit
hiy
ouwantedtokeepourworkandpersonal
li
vessepar
ate.Ormaybefat
ewantedi
tthi
s
way
.”Weall
engagedinfr
iendl
ybant
erunt
ill
unchisoverandIhavetogobacktowor
k.Fi
siwe
i
sshockedt
oseemecomeoutoft
heof
fi
ce.

“
Ithoughty
ouwer
egoneoutf
orl
unch.
”

“
Ihadt
ojoi
nint
hemeet
ingaswel
l
.”

“Howi
she?
”Sheseesmyconf
usedl
ookandcl
ari
fi
es.“
Isheaf
ri
endl
yandappr
oachabl
eguy
?”

“
Idon’
tknow.Hewasal
lbusi
nessi
nther
e.”Iqui
ckl
ybr
ushherof
f.

I
t’
s30minut
esl
aterwhenSaziemergesf
rom t
heof
fi
ce.Heseemsmor
erel
axedt
hanbef
ore.
Hegi
vesmealookashewalkspass.

“Thi
smanisfl
amesLona,
”Fi
fiwhi
sper
s.Iknowf
ir
sthandexact
lyhowf
lami
nghothei
s.I
’
mina
dazethewhol
eaf
ter
noon.

Idon’
tseeMondebef
oregoi
nghome.Shei
sinameet
ingt
hatwi
l
lruni
ntoear
lyev
eni
ng.

Ideci
det
ocal
lLal
aonemor
eti
mebef
oregoi
ngt
oherhouse.Sur
pri
singl
ysheanswer
s.

“
Lal
amyf
ri
end.Iwasaboutt
ocomebudgi
ngaty
ourhouse.Whyar
eyouav
oidi
ngme?
”

“
HeyLona.Ineedt
oseey
ou.
”Okayt
hat
’sal
armi
ng.

“
When?
”

“Nowi
fy oudon’tmind.Let
smeetatMuggandBeani
nEast
gat
e.Let
ssay20mi
nut
es.
”Iagr
ee
anddr
ivestr
aightther
e.

Ifi
ndheral
readywai
ti
ng.Shest
andsandgi
vesmeacol
dhug.Thi
sher
ebef
oremei
snotmy
fr
iend.

“
Whati
sgoi
ngonLal
a?”IaskasIt
akeaseat
.

“
Aloti
sgoingon.Br
ianandIaretr
yingt
owor
kthi
ngsoutandwef
eel
thatmehav
ingsi
ngl
e
f
ri
endsatt
hismomentisnotideal
.”

“
Bit
chy
ouonl
yhav
eonef
ri
end!
”Thatj
ustcomesoutunf
il
ter
edbuti
t’
sthet
rut
h.

“Wel
lIneedtomakemutualf
ri
endswi
thBr
ian.Peopl
ewecandot
hingst
oget
herasacoupl
e.I
hopeyouunder
stand.
”Thef
uckIdon’
t.

“Li
stenLala,
don’tyouseewhatheisdoi
ng?Hei
str
yingt
oisol
atey
ouf
rom y
ourl
ovedones.He
i
scontrol
li
ngy ou.Thi
sisnoty
ou!”

“Lonathi
sismydeci
sionandI
’
dappr eci
ateiti
fyourespecti
t.
”Shepicksupherbagandst
ands.
Istandandhol
dherar
m.Shefli
nches.Ipull
hersleeveupandfinddarkmarksonherar
m.

“
Lal
a.What
’st
his?
”shequi
ckl
yhi
desi
t.

“
It
’snot
hing.If
ell
.Goodby
eLona.Pl
easest
opcal
l
ingme.
”Shewal
ksaway
.

“
Ishoul
djustwaitf
oryourbodytosur
facef
rom adit
chsomewher e.
”Iscream af
terher
.The
whol
erest
aurantgoesqui
et.Igr
abmybagandal sol
eave.Idr
ivestr
aighttot
hepolicest
ati
on.I
tr
yandexplaintotheoff
icersrepeat
edl
yandtheirresponsestay
sthesame.Unti
lshel
ays
char
gesthereisnothi
ngt heycando.Andmyclaimsar eunfoundedsi
nceIhav
enoev i
dencet
o
backthem upwith.Twohour slat
erIwal
koutfeeli
ngdef eat
ed.

Ical
launt
ythemomentIgethomeandspeakt
othekidsf
orawhilewhi
chcalmsmedownabi
t.
Oncedonewitht
hatcal
lIt
akeabat
handgetinbed.I
’
m nothungr
yeventhoughIdi
dn’
the
supper
.

Imissmyev
eni
ngchatswithMondeandSazi
.Theyhav
est
oppedsi
nce.JustasI
’
m aboutt
o
dozeof
fmyphonebeeps.I
t’
samessagefr
om Monde.

-
Lunchwaswonder
ful
.Ni
ghtbaby
-

Ihav
eagoof
ysmi
l
eonmyf
aceasIt
ypemyr
esponse.

-
Ienj
oyedt
hei
n-bet
weenmor
e-ki
ssemoj
i
.

Sher
espondswi
thahear
t.If
all
asl
eepsmi
l
ingl
i
keasi
l
lyt
eenager
.

I’
m wokenupfr
om mydeepsl
umberbymyr
ingi
ngphone.Ist
ruggl
etogethol
dofi
tbut
event
uall
yIdo.

“
Yes,
”Imumbl
e.

“
Linamandl
a.”Whatt
hef
uck.It
ryandsi
tupbutIst
il
lfeel
sleepy
.

“
Ngi
l
angaphandl
e.”Myhear
tbeatst
art
saccel
erat
ing.

“
Doy
ouknowwhatt
imei
tIs?
”hesi
ghs.

“
DoesMondeknowy
ouar
eher
e?”hesi
ghsagai
n.

“
Yesshedoes.
”Hei
sly
ingIknowi
t.Igetupandwearmymor
ninggownandsl
i
pper
s.

Ifi
ndhiscarparkedr
ightupf
ront
.Hewal
ksoutt
hemomentheseesmeandcomesar
oundt
o
openthedoorforme.

“
What
’st
hisSazi
?I’
m wor
kingi
nthemor
ning.
”

“Nothingmuch.Justneededy ourcompanynothi
ngelse.”Heleansbacki
nhisseat
,cl
oseshis
eyesandthenit’
stotalsi
lence.Iwaitt
hinki
nghe’
l
leventuall
ysaysomethi
ng.Nothi
ng,
event
uall
y
Ireal
iseheisasl
eep.Thecari swarm andIevent
ual
lyfallasl
eep.

I
’
m wokenupbyasoundofhi
svoi
ce.

“
Babe,Ja.Yougotmynot
e?I’
m atherpl
ace.Sl
epti
nthecaract
ual
l
y.Jashei
sher
e.Il
ovey
ou.
”
Hechuckl
esandhandsmethephone.

“
Sohemadey
ousl
eepi
nthecar
?”

“
I’
m st
il
lconf
usedbyt
hat
.”

“
May
behewasmi
ssi
ngy
ou.
”
“
Andy
ouar
eokaywi
tht
hat
?”

“HowcanInotbe?It
’shar
dnott
omi
ssy
ou.I
’
llseey
ouj
ustnow.
”ShehangsupandwhenIl
ook
atthet
imei
t’
sjustaft
er5am.

“I
fyouareconsider
ingourproposal
andIhav eafeel
ingyouare.Askall
thequesti
onsyouneed
fr
om us.Don’
tleaveanyt
hingout.Other
wiseyou’
l
l t
urnyourheadinsi
deout.Bel
ievei
tornotwe
bothcar
eabouty ouandhowt hisaf
fect
sy ou.
”

“Okay.Ineedtogogetr
eadyforwork.
”Henodshi sheadashecomesoutt
oopent
hedoorfor
me.Hewat chesmeasIwal
kintothehouse.Ishakemyheadandgomakeastr
ongcupof
coff
ee.Ineedi t
.

Chapt
er20

“
Baby
,I'
m hotj
ustl
i
keanov
en

Ineedsomel
ovi
n'

Andbaby
,Ican'
thol
ditmuchl
onger

I
t'
sget
ti
ngst
rongerandst
ronger

AndwhenIgett
hatf
eel
i
ng

Iwantsexual
heal
i
ng

Sexual
heal
i
ng,
ohbaby

Makesmef
eel
sof
ine”
-Mar
vinGay
e

It
’saFr i
dayandIhav eal ottocel ebr
ate.Firstl
yI’vedecidedtogivethi
st hreewayr elationshipa
go.Aft ersomecl ar
if
icationofcour se.Secondl y,myhousehasbeensol d.Myagentf ounda
cashbuy erfori
t.Apparentlyit
’swasabar gainatj ustunder2mi l
li
on.Accor di
ngt omyagent
housesi nBedf ordsell
forwaymor ethanIof fered.TobehonestIwant edt oberidoft hathouse
asqui cklyasIcould.Theonl yt hi
ngIneededt ot i
emewi thTsi
etsiwhichIhadnochoi ceov er
wast heki ds.Myagenti nformedmet hatf undswoul dgot omyaccountt hefoll
owingweek.
Throught hi
shousesel l
ing,Ikindofhadaf l
ashofgeni us.Imightstar
twi thpropertyinv est
ment.
Buyhousesonauct i
onf ixthem upandr esel lt
hem.Ij ustneedtofindouthowt hemar ketis
curr
ent ly.Icandothisasapar t-t
imesour ceofi ncome.

I
’m al
sof
ort
unatet
hatI
’
m abl
etosav
eal
lmysalar
y.I
’
m st
il
ll
iv
ingof
fthemoneyTsi
etsi
hadt
o
payandmyhousei
ssortedf
ort
hewhol
eyear
.
Earl
ierintheoff
iceIhadaskedt oknowoffearl
y.Ineededtodoabi
tofgroomi
ng.Ialso
i
nformedhert hatIneededtoseethem toni
ghtandthatIhadmademydecisi
on.Icouldseet
he
uncertai
ntyonherfaceandahi ntoffeari
nhereye.Ifi
twasuptohershewoul
dhav easkedme
thenwhatmydeci sionwas.Ienjoyedmakinghersweatabit.

Myhairisdone.Ipl
antedalongPeruvi
anweave.Pedi
cureandmanicur
einorder
.Iam gr
oomed
andtri
mmedi nallt
herightpl
aces.It
akeext
racarei
nchoosingmyoutfi
t.I
'
m aimingf
orsexy
toni
ght.Imustbedri
ppingwithi
t.Iwantt
hosetwotodroolwhent
heyseeme.

Itstart
swit
hunderwear,
blacklacepanti
esandamat chi
ngbra.Thenblackbodyhuggi
ngdress.
Iknowmybodyi stheshit
.ThenIf i
nishthel
ookwit
hmyr edbottoms.Mondecal l
edearl
ier
i
nf ormingmethattheyweresendingthedri
vert
opickmeup.Myov ernightbagi
sready.

Iwalkouttohim andhecomesoutandgetsmybagwhileheopensformeatt
heback.I
’
m so
readyf
orthiseventheper
sist
enti
nter
nal
quest
ionshav
ebeensilencedonl
ymyresol
ver
emai
n.

Themomentt hedriv
erpar ksthecarMondeandSazi arewai t
ingupfront.Ifwasai mingfor
sexythentheywentf orbroke.I’
mt heonedrool
ing.Mondei sinashor tbl
ackdr esswithher
l
egsondi spl
ay .Damnshei sf
ine.Sheisal
sowear i
ngabl ackheel.Herhairisleftl
oose
cascadingwav esdownherback.AndSazi ,navysli
mfit
tingpant s.Cr
ispwhi t
esl i
mf i
tti
ngshir
t
notie.Theyarebothdrippinginsexappeal
.

Theybothcomet owardsthecarandSaziopensf ormeandgi vesmehishandtoassi

stasI
comeout.Hiseyesf ol
l
owmyl egsasIst
epout .Iinst
inct
ivel
yshareahugwithhi
m.Hesmells
wonderf
ul.Ii
nhalehisscentandmarinat
einit.Af ewsecondslongert
hanusualhelet
sgoandI
melti
nMonde’ sarms.Shei sbegi
nni
ngtofeel l
ikehomef orme.

“
Youl
ookgor
geous,
”Sazi
say
s.I
’
m bl
ushi
ng.Theheati
nhi
sey
esr
eaf
fi
rmst
hecompl
ement
.

MondetakesmyhandasSazit
akesmybagfr
om t
hedr i
ver
.Wewal
kinsil
encei
ntothehouse.
Sazi
walksofftoputmybagwher
everwhi
l
eMondeleadsmetot
hedini
ngroom wheredinner
hasbeenset.

Thesetupisclear
lyaprel
udetotheeveni
ngahead.I
tissexyandatthesamet i
meromanti
c.
Theyareobvi
ouslynotexpect
ingano.Therei
sChampaignchill
i
nginice.Al
readyt
hetabl
ehas
beensetf
ort
hest
art
ers.

“
Youl
ookgor
geousbaby
,”Monder
eit
erat
eswhatSaz
isai
dear
li
er.

“Thankyou.Sodoyou,
”Irespond.Shepullsmebymyneckandweshar eakissthatget
smein
themood.JustthenIf
eelSazi’
shandatt hebackofmyneck.Hepullsusapartandsmashes
hisli
psonMonde.Thekissiseroti
canddi r
ty.Ial
sowantinontheacti
onasifhereadmymind
heturnsanddoesthesamewi t
hme.I tendst oosoon.Hel
eavesusbothpanti
ng.

Heopenst hechairf
orMondeonhi srightsideanddoest hesamef ormeonhi slef
t.Oncewe
areseat ed.Thechefbringst hestart
ers.Sazi pourswi nef orusasweenj oyt hemeal.Dinneris
aneroticev entwit
hallthreeofusexchangi ngsexual innuendosthroughout.Wear eserveda
deli
cioussi xcoursemeal whichIthoroughlyenjoy .Theat mosphereiscar efreeandrel
axedbut
al
sof il
ledwi t
hsexualtension.Oncedi nnerisov erandt hestaf
fisdismissedSazif il
lsour
champagnegl assesandl eadsust ooneoft heli
vingr ooms.Theybot hsitinonecouchwhi leI
si
topposi tethem.Idon’tev enthi
nki t
si nt
ent i
onall
yjustf amili
ari
ty.

“
Thankyoufort
hewonder
fuldi
nner
.It
horoughl
yenjoy
edi
t.
”It
rul
ydi
d.Theyhadal
lmy
f
avour
it
es,cl
ear
lyt
heydopayatt
ent
iontowhatIli
ke.

“Itwasourpleasurebaby, I
’
m glady ouenjoyedit
,”Mondesay s.I
’
mt empor ar
il
ydistractedbyher
sheerbeauty.Sheisjustglowing.Herey esaresofterandshei smorer el
axed.Saziisleaning
backanepi t
omeofr elaxed.Hei swatchingmeov erhishoodedey el
i
dsandIf indthatsucha
turnon.Monder el
axesagai nsthischestwhi l
eSazi wrapshisarm ar
oundhershoul der.Hei s
hersafeplaceIreali
se.Ithi
nkwi thhim aroundshef eelssaf
eandpr otect
ed.Theirlovei s
honestl
yeffort
lessinthewayt heyshowi t
.

“Well
Isupposewebet t
ergettothepointofthi
sev eni
ng.Iwantyou,bot
h.Ican’tev
enchose
whoIwantt hemostbetweenthet woofyoubutI’
m sur eIdon’
tevenhavetheluxur
yofachoice
asyoucomeasapackage.WhatIwantt ol
aybarei st
hatformet hi
sisexpl
ori
ng.It’
s
somethingnew.I’
veneverdoneitbefor
eandIneverev enthoughtofi
t?Icanchangemymi nd
atanyti
meifit
’snotwhatIwant.Iam atanexplor
ingphase.

Myconcer nthoughisthatyouseem t
obei nvolvedwit
hy ourf
eeli
ngsandIr
eall
yhopedwe
wouldn’tbecatchi
ngfeeli
ngsovert
his.Thatcouldleadtosomeonebeinghurt
.I’
m def
ini
tel
ynot
readyforthatki
ndofcommi t
mentfr
om anyty peofrel
ati
onship.
”IseeMondebli
nkwhileSazi
conti
nuest owatchme.
“
Now.Whatki
ndofar
rangementdoy
ouhav
einmi
nd?
”

“Well
ideall
ywewoul dl i
keyout ocomej oi
nusoncer taindays.Meaningy oucomev i
sitwithus.
Weshar ethebedwhenweal lwant.Wecanalsoseeeachot herseparately.Meaningify oufeel
l
ikebeingwithmet henitwoul dbejustthetwoofus.I fyouwantthesamewi thSazithent hat
’s
whaty ouget.Nor
mal l
yt houghSazi andIwoul ddecidewhent oseey ou.Weusual l
yspent
mostofourt imetogetherandwoul dcomet oyouwhenneeded.Howev erthingsaredi ff
erent
wit
hy ou.Wehav edeepf eeli
ngsforyouLona.Thisisnotj ustathr
il
lseeki ngthingforus.We
careforyouandy ouhav easayi nhowy ouwantthistowor kout.Honest lyifi
twasupt omeI
wouldlovetowakeupnextt obot hofyoueverydayofmyl i
fe,
”myhear tlurches.Sazil ooksat
herwithalookIcan’tdecipherashet i
ghtenshisholdonher .Thenplantingaki ssonherhead.

“Weunder standthought hatitisimpract

ical wit
hy ouasther
earekidsinvol
ved.Wedon'twant
them exposedtosomet hi ngtheyarenotr eadyf orandwil
lnotunderst
and.Theyarewaytoo
youngf orustoexplaintheki ndofli
festy
lewear eintoandunti
lyouaresurethi
sli
fest
ylei
s
whaty ouwantt hentheywi llonl
yknowusanduncl eSaziandAuntyMondei nthei
rli
vesand
nothi
ngmor e.Wewi l
lbedi screetaboutthis.Ifi
tbecomesaper manentpartofusthenatthe
ri
ghtandappr opriat
eagewewi ll
haveadi scussionwi t
hthem i
fyouall
owi t
,”Sazi
says.

“
Howaboutforst
art
ersyouspendadaywit
heachofussepar
atel
yandt
henonedayi
tswi
th
t
het
hreeofustoget
her?
”Mondesuggest
s.

“
DoIcal
lyou?Text
?Goondat
eswi
thei
therofy
ouori
sitst
ri
ctl
ysexual
?”

“Agai
nideal
l
yitwouldbest
rictl
ysexual
.Linesar
eblur
redwi thyouLona.Weenjoyyour
companyandwanttoseeyouhappy .Soyes,cal
lwhenever.Wear ealli
nar
elat
ionshi
p.When
youneedacertai
nneedful
fi
lledyoucanreachoutt
other elevantper
sonamongstus,Sazi
and
Iwil
ldothesame.”

“
Hol
i
day
s?”

“
Wecanallgotoget
herorsepar
atel
y.Eachofushasachoi
cewhot
heywantt
ohol
i
daywi
th,
”
Monder
esponds.
“Whathappensi
fImeetapersonoutsi
deofthi
suni
on.Let
ssayaman,
whatt
hen?
”Monde
shi
ft
suncomf or
tabl
ewhi
leSazigr
indshisj
aw.

“I
fyouwer
ejustdat
ingaguyandt
heny
oumeetsomeoneel
sewhatwoul
dbey
ouract
ion?
”Sazi
asks.

“Iwoul
dbreakthi
ngsoffwi
tht
heguybefor
est
art
ingar
elat
ionshi
pwi
tht
heot
herper
son.
”I
guessIj
ustansweredmyownquest
ion.

“Li
na,youarenotchai
nedint
othis.Youhaveachoi
ce.Wheneveryoufeeli
t’
snotworki
ng,you
canbreakupwithusandwewi ll
dot hesame.Thedif
fer
enceisthatMondeandIcomeasa
package.Ther
eisnoseparat
ingus.Youwanttheotheryougetall
ofus.I
foneofusisn’
thappy
thenyouloosebothofus.
”

“Forsafetyreasonstheonerequi
rementisthatwearefai
thf
uli
nthi
sunion.Nosleepi
ngaround
withoutsideparti
esasi twi
l
laff
ectal
lthreeofus.Hencewesay.I
fit
’snotworki
ngwebr eak
thi
ngsof fbeforeinvol
vi
ngoutsi
depeople.Anythi
ngoutsi
deoft
hisfr
om all
thr
eeofusi s
consideredcheating,
”Mondesays.

“
Whatdowet
ell
peopl
e?”

“
Idon’
tseewhatourbedr
oom l
i
fehast
odowi
thot
herpeopl
e?”Sazi
say
s.

“
I’
m notsay
ingIwantt
otel
lpeopl
ebutwon'
tpeopl
esuspect
?”

“Pr
obablyt
hoseinourinnerci
rclewil
lsuspectbutwedon’
tmindthem i
ftheyknowmy
concer
nsistheki
ds.Thisshouldn’
tgettothem bef
orewearereadyf
orthem tofi
ndout
,”
Mondesays.

“
Ithi
nkweneedt
oest
abl
i
shwhoi
sinouri
nnerci
rcl
e,
”Sazi
adds.

“
MineisLal
abutwear enotascl
osel
atel
y.Tsi
etsi
isn’
tinmyl
i
fe.Sot
hat
’sal
l
.Myi
nnerci
rcl
eis
t
hekidsandthei
rnanny.
”
“
Wel
lIt
hinkt
hat
’smanageabl
e.”Mondesay
s.

“I
nourcir
cleit
’sBheki
Sane,
AthiandAndi
l
e.I
’
m sur
enoneoft
hem woul
ddi
vul
geourpr
ivat
e
busi
nesswithanyone,
”Sazi
says.

Mymostpreval
entquest
ionshav
ebeenaddr
essedandIcan'
tthi
nkofany
thi
ngt
hatneedst
o
beaddr
essed.

“Thereisonemor ething.Asyoubothknowt hatLi

naandIhav ebeeni nt
imatewithoutany
protecti
on.Thatwasr eckl
essonmypar tandasmuchaswewi llprobablybeinanexclusi
ve
rel
ationshi
pweal lneedtogettest
ed.Justtolayoutfearstorestifthereisany.Wecannot
affordforLi
natogetpr egnant
.Thatwouldruinthi
srelat
ionshi
p.”Mondet akesasipofherwi
ne.

“Wecanusecondomsf
ornowunt
ilwegogetat
hor
oughphy
sical
exam,
”Mondesuggest
s.

“I
’
m goi
ngonacont
racept
ive.Iwast
hinki
ngofani
mpl
ant
,”Iqui
pin.

“WellIt
hinkwehavecoveredt
hebasi
sbutwewi l
lseeasthingsgo.Whatwor
ksf
orusandwhat
doesn’t
.Communicat
ioniskeyi
nthi
skindofr
elat
ionshi
p.”

Mondesay swhi l
eget t
ingup.Shecomest owardsmeandpul l
smet omyf eet.“Welcomet o
ourfamily,
”shewhi spersj ustbeforeshepullsmeinahug.Shesmel l
sgreat.Ihaveat hingfor
greatscent.I
tsintoxi
cating.Shepul lsbackandcaresst hesi
deofmyf ace.Ourey esare
almostlevelbutshei ssli
ghtlytal
l
ert hanme.Herar m holdsmet i
ghtagainstmywai stasshe
pull
smeev encloser.Shepushesmyhai rbackandpullsmecl oser.Icanfeel herbreath
fanni
ngmyf ace.Wear esocl oset hatherir
islookalmostadeepshadeofgr een.Iplacemy
handsonherl owerback.

“
Hey
,”shesay
s

“Hey
,”Iwhisperr
ightback.Hereyesarescanningmyface.Herbr eathmi ngl
eswithmineas
shegetscl
oserasi fi
nslowmot i
onuntilherl
i
psslowlycapturemi ne.Icanbarel
yfeelt
hem.It
’s
asoft
esttouch.SheexploresmylipsandIret
ur nt
heerot
ickiss.Hert onguesli
desinandgl
i
des
agai
nstmine.Webot hmoanast hepleasureanddesi
reintensi
fies.
I
t’soffi
cial
,Iloveherkisses.Icantast
ethewineinsi
dehermout handi tmakesthi
skisseven
mor epotent.Ifeelhandsfrom behi
ndglidi
ngupmyst omachtocupmysensi t
iveboobs.Ican
feelmyhar dnippleschaffi
ngagainstthefabr
icofmydress.Hishandsgentlymassagemy
breastwhilehepi nchesmyni ppl
esbetweenhisthumbandf or
efi
nger.Theactionsendswav es
ofelect
ricfeeli
ngshoot i
ngt hr
oughmypussy .Icanfeel
mybodyst art
ingtobreakint
osweat .

Beingsandwichedbet weent hetwohasmybodybur

ningup.If
eelf
everi
sh.Sazist
art
splant
ing
openmout hkissesont hesideofmyneckuptomyearandthenhenibbl
esonmyear l
obeand
gentl
epull
s.Icanf eel
hi sbulgeonmyassandmydrenchedpussyi
spulsat
ing.

I
’vebeenr
eadyforthi
sthewholeweek.Beencravingit,l
ongi
ngfori
tanddr eamingaboutit
.The
real
i
tyofi
tisbeyondmyi magi
nat
ion.If
eelami l
li
onf eeli
ngsal
latonce.Idon’tknowwhatto
dowithmysel
f.I
’
m holdi
ngontoMonde’swaistrealti
ght.Mykneesarethreateningt
ogivein.

Sazipr
esseshisbodycloserandmyi nnervagi
nawall
sclenchbor der
ingonpai
nful
.Hi
shands
golowerandhegrabsmydr essandpulli
toffmeinaninstant
.Itleavesmehal
fnakedandbot
h
ofthem st
il
lful
l
ydressed.I
’m dizzywi
thneed.It
’swi
l
d!Ican’tbreath.

Mondel
etsgoofmyl
i
psandst
epsbackappr
aisi
ngmybody
.

“Damnbaby.Youlookhotasfuck!
,”shesay
si nherhuskyt
one.Mybreastar
ealmostspi
ll
i
ng
outoft
hebra.Hereyeshavezoomedi nonthem thenshebendsdownandtakesmynippl
e
thr
oughthel
acyfabri
candpulls.

“Mhhhhhhhhh,”mymoansur prisesevenmy sel

f.I
nt hemeant i
meSazi ’
shandgoesi nsi
demy
panti
es.I’
m suretheheatcomingof fmycoreisburninghishand.Hesl owlysli
desiti
nunti
lhis
fi
ngersseparatemywetf ol
dspur posef
ull
y.Iwonderiftheytooklessonsinpleasuri
ngaperson
atthesamet i
me.I ’
m wi
ldwi t
hneedbor deri
ngonmadness.Hi smi ddl
efingergl
idesagai
nstmy
engorgedcli
twi t
hpurpose.I
t’
snotenought odri
vemeov erbuttokeepmeont heedge.

Mondei sal
ter
nat
ingbet
weenmynippl
esgivi
ngthem t
hor
oughatt
enti
on.Thepebbl
ednipples
havepoppedoutandcal
li
ngoutf
ormore.Shecupsmybreasti
nbothherhandsandcont
inue
feast
ing.

“
Ineedt
o..
.,
”Ican’
tputacoher
entsent
encet
oget
her
.I’
m abl
abbi
ngmess.
“
Whatdoy
ouneed,
”Sazi
voi
cev
ibr
atesagai
nstmyear
.

“Needto.
..cum...pl
ease.
..I
t.
..
hur
ts,
”Ineverknewpl
easurecouldbethi
spai
nful
.Thi
sint
ense.
Mylegsarelit
erall
yshaki
ng.Mondepullsawayandwalksoff.Howissheabl
etowalk?IknowI
can’
t.

“Khumalodoy
out hi
ng,
”shesaysst
rut
ti
ngaway.Whi
l
esti
l
ltry
ingtofi
gur
eoutwhatshemeans.
Sazipi
cksmeupandIy el
plocki
ngmylegsar
oundhi
swai
st.Helet
soutadeepchuckl
eashe
fol
lowsMondeli
keIweighnothi
ng.

I
’
mlooki
ngathi
m wi
thmyar
msar
oundhi
sneck.Hei
slooki
ngbackatmewi
thneedr
efl
ect
ed
i
nhi
seyes.

“
Don’
tdr
opme,
”Iwhi
sper
.

“Never,
”hewhisper
sri
ghtback.Ismi
leandheretur
nsi
t.Myhear
tlegi
tst
opsforasecond.He
fol
lowsMondei nt
owhatIassumet obethemainbedr
oom.Iknowit'
sbigandIal
soknowi t
’s
gorgeousbutIhavenoti
metospareforthedeco.

Hegent l
ypl acesmeont hehugebedandt hendi pshi sheadt ocapturemyswol lenl i
psi n
anotherintenseki ss.It
’sur gentanddemandi ng.Heuncl aspmybr aandthrowsi tcarelesslyto
thesideashef eastsonmyal readyov ersensi ti
vebreastsandIf eelli
keI’
m aboutt ocum.Hi s
clot
hesar er ubbingagai nstmybar eskinaddi ngt othesweett ort
ure.Hemov esdownl eavi
nga
trai
lofscor chingheatdownmyt ummyunt ilhei sfacedwi t
hmymound.Icansmel lthemusky
scentofmyar ousal andIknowhecant oo.Hepl antssmal lkissesalongmypant yli
neashe
hookshisf inger st henpeel st hepantiesoff.Hehasmyonl egupandhei ski ssingmeupmy
calfint
omyi nnert highs.Thebeddi psandIf eel Mondenextt ome.WhenIl ookathershei sas
needyasIam.Ipul lherdownandt akeherl i
psi nmi ne.Theki ssisclumsyr eflectingourneed.
Shegetsont opandIhol dherclosertome.Shei snakedandoursof tbodi
esdanceasweget
deeperandl ostinourki ss.Ihearal ongmoanf rom deepwi thinher.Shestopst heki ssI
supposet osav oirthef eelofSazi i
nsideofher .Hepul lsherupandhav eherbackagai nsthis
chestwhi l
ehepl ungesherf r
om theback.I ’ml efttherewi t
hmyl egswideopenf orthem to
feastont hem.

“
Touchy
our
sel
fLi
na,
letmeseey
oupl
aywi
thy
our
sel
f,
”Sazigr
owl
s.Idon’
tneedt
obet
old
twice.Myhandi sburiedinmyheat edmoundi nsecondswhi leIplaywi t
hmybr eastwi ththe
otherThesi ghtoft hem fucki
ngisbeyonderot i
citsartist
ic.Hehashi sonear ml ockedagainst
herwaistwhi l
et heotheraroundherneck.Shei sonlyhol di
ngont ohisforear
m.Thesoundsof
fl
eshagai nstwetf l
eshspur smeonasIpr of
uselyrubmyengor gedclit
.Icanseehi swethard,
l
ongdi ckgoingi nandoutofher .Idon’twanttocum andy etwiththesightinfrontofmeI ’m
notgoingt olastlong.SazisuddenlypushesMonde’ sheadt owar dsmyopenpussyandshe
l
atchesont omycl i
t.Shesucksandl i
cksmewi t
hpur pose.Inaspl i
tsecondIexpl odeletti
ng
outasoundl essscr eam atthesamet i
measMonder eachesherpi nnacl
ewhi chpushesSazi
overtheedge.Ther oom isfil
l
edwithourscreams.ThenMondef lopsont opofme.Ihav eno
wor dstodescribewhatj usthappenedbutIwantt odoi toverandov eragain.AfterSazitakes
extracareinwi pingustheyplacemei nthemi ddleast heycuddl emet osleep.

It
’sthefoll
owi
ngmor ningandI’m wokenupbysoundofashowerrunning.Icansti
ll
feel
someone'spresencenexttomeandI ’mlockedi
nthei
rarms.Iknowit
’sSazi whenIfeelt
he
hardnessofhisbody.Itr
ytowi ggl
eoutbuthewon'tl
etgo.AsIconti
nuet owiggl
eIf eel
somet hi
nghardpokingagainstmyass.

“
Sazi
,Iknowy
ouar
eawake.Icanf
eel
you,
”Isaywi
thmyv
oicest
il
lful
lofsl
eep.

“
Goodmor
ning,
”hi
svoi
cev
ibr
atesagai
nstmyspi
ne.

“
Goodmor
ning.
”Het
urnsmear
oundunt
ilwear
efaci
ngeachot
her
.

“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng.
”Hehasaconcer
nedl
ookonhi
sface.

“
Ifeel
wonder
ful
.”Hesmi
l
es.I
’
m goi
ngt
ost
artpay
inghi
mforhi
ssmi
l
es.

“Good. ”BeforeIknowi t
.Ourt onguesareduel l
inginal ustfil
ledkiss.Ourhandsar eall
ov er
eachot her.Isuddenlywanthi m withanintensitythati
sbey ondr easoni
ng.Ifeeli
nghishar d
dickagai nstmythighhot, heavyandl eavi
ngat r
ailofpre-
cum.Hei snowont opandIfeel the
topofhi sengorgedmemberr equesti
ngent ryi
nmypussy .Iopenmyl egsandal l
owhi m access.
Hegl idesinandmyi nnerwal lsstret
cht oaccommodat ehisgi r
th.Webot hgroanagainstour
l
ips.Hegl i
desinunti
l heisburiedtothehilt.Thenhest art
st hrusti
ng.It
’sf
ast,uncoordi
nat ed
thrustsandi t
’sbeyondpl easure.Heisconst antlyhitt
ingthespotandIknowI ’
m notgoingt o
l
astl ong.Ihavehim onl ockdownwi thmyl egsandar msaroundhi m.
“I
’
m gonnacum..
.”Isay.Hei
ncr
easeshi
spaceandspi
l
lshimselfdeepinsi
demywombasmy
pussywal
lsgr
iphim whil
ewebothri
det
hewaveofourcl
i
max .Bothourheart
beat
sar
egoi
ng
wil
d.

“
Fuck!
”webot
hhearherwhisperf
rom behi
ndus.If
eelSazi
tenseabitbuthequickl
yrecov
ers.
I
’
m soonaswel
l.I
’
m notsur
ehowIf eelatt
hesamet i
memybodyi ssti
llbuzzi
ngwit
hpleasure.

“Shi
t!
”hepul
lsoutandIf
eel
atr
ailofwet
nesssmear
smyi
nnert
highst
henIr
eal
i
sewedi
dn’
t
useacondom.

“Whydoyoubothlookwei
rd?Thatwasfucki
nghot!
”Mondehasn’
tcaughtontoourdi
l
emma.
Sazi
walksof
ftothebathr
oom naked.I
’
mt empor
ari
lydi
str
act
edbyhiscuteass.

Mondecr
awl
sov
ermewi
thonl
yat
owel
wrappedar
oundher
.

“
Goodmor
ningbaby
,”shesay
swhi
l
eper
kingmyl
i
ps.

“
Wedi
dn’
tuseacondom j
ustnow,
”Ibl
urti
tout
.Shef
rowns.

“Okay
.Don’tst
ress.Wewil
lgetamorni
ngaft
er.
”Inodmyhead.Ineedtobeoncont
racept
ives
asinyest
erday
.IalsowhydoIfeel
guil
tyf
orbeingwi
thSazi
behindherback?

Chapt
er21

“
Uh,
gir
lIt
urnt
hatt
hingi
ntoar
ain-
for
est

Rai
nonmyhead,
cal
lthatbr
ainst
ormi
ng

Yeaht
hisi
sdeep,
oh,
butIgodeeper

Makey
oul
osey
our
sel
f,andf
inder
skeeper
s

I
tgogr
eenl
i
ght
,goWeezygo

Il
i
ket
otast
ethatsugar
,thatsweetandl
ow
Buthol
dupwai
t,newposi
ti
on

Iputheronmypl
atet
henIdot
hedi
shes

Shemymot
ivat
ion,
I’
m hert
ranspor
tat
ion

CauseIl
etherr
ide,
whi
l
eIdr
ivehercr
azy

ThenIj
ustkeepgoi
nggoi
ng,
li
keI
’
mraci
ng

WhenI
’
m doneshehol
dmel
i
keaconv
ersat
ionWeezybaby
”-Kel
l
yRowl
and

I
tsMondaymor ni
ngandI’m wal
ki
ngaroundt
heoff
icel
ikeaZombi
e.Il
eftt
heKhumalo’s
y
ester
dayaf
ternoon.Ever
ytimeIthi
nkbackt
otheweekendmypussycl
enches.Iwas
t
hor
oughlyfuckedthi
spastweekend.

Ionl
ysawMondebr i
efl
ybefor
eshewenttoameet i
ngoutofof
fi
ce.Shedi
dn’
tneedmeandI
don’
tthinkIcoul
dhavebeenanyusef
ul.Shehasbeenwalki
ngaroundwi
thagl
owandagli
nti
n
hereye.Abeauti
ful
sightt
osee.

Sazi
alsocal
l
edt
ocheckuponmeaswel
lthi
smor
ning.Iam enj
oyi
ngt
heat
tent
ionf
rom bot
hI
mustsay.

Therei
sstil
lnowordf
rom Tsi
etsi
andi t
’sworr
yingbecauseapparent
lyt
heNigeri
ansar
estil
l
l
ookingforhi
m andar
egetti
ngagit
ated.Ihav
easecur i
tydet
ailt
hatwatchesovermediscr
eetl
y
ofcourse.

Theweekgoesbyv eryfast.Ispendmostofmyl unchti

mewi thMonde.Weal way shaverelaxed
conver
sationsduringthistimej ustgett
ingtoknoweachot hermore.Ienjoyhercompany
i
mmensel y .Wecanj ustbegi r
lsandhav eourgirltal
korwecoul dbefli
rt
ing,i
tdependsont he
mood.Shehast hethingshedoeswhenshel aughs,man,i
tsdamnsexy .Shet hrowsherhead
backandl aughsf r
om deepwi thin.Oh.Shekeepsherhairlooseandit’
squiteachangef rom
theneattightbun.Ilovetheselunchhour s.Il
ookforwardtothem.Sazispeakst omeev er
y
eveni
ngont hephone.Wear ebackt oourlongfl
irt
ati
ousconv er
sat
ionsandIal soenj
oythem t o
thecore.Theyaremyni ghtcap.

It
’saFr i
dayandmybodyhassuf fici
entl
yrecovered.Iwantt ospendtimewi t
hMonde.I’
m
cravi
nghersof ttouchandIonlywanttobewi thher .Justthetwoofus, awayfr
om workand
withoutSazi.Idecidetogoint
oherof f
iceandletherknow.Il ookdamnhoti fmaysayso
my sel
f.Ihaveabaei ntheof
fi
ce,soeverydayItakeext r
acar ei
nselecti
ngmyout f
it
s.Imustsay
Mondei salsodoi ngthemost.It
hinkshehasr eali
sedt hatIhaveathingforherl
egsandher
hairbei ngl oose.Throughouttheweekshehasdoneherbestt oshowherl egswi thoutbeing
distastef ulandthoset i
ghthairbunsseemst obeat hingofthepast.It
’seitherlooseorl oosel
y
ti
ed.Il ov eitwhenshehasi tt
iedlooselysometimesasi tshowsherdelicateneck.Andt hat
remi ndsmeofwhenI ’
m planti
ngkissesalongthelengthofherneckandhowi tdriv
esher
i
nsane.I t’soneofherer ogenouszones.That,herbreastandalongherspi ne.Youki ssherin
thosepl acesy oucreateaninferno.Theotherdayshecamef r
om justbeingsuckedonher
boobs.Gosh.I ’
m amess.Mymi ndisforev
eroccupiedwi t
hsexandmor esex.

Iknockonceonherdoorandpushi
topen.Sheisbentov
erherl
apt
opwor
king.Iwal
kinand
l
ock.Shesit
supandleansbackagai
nstherchai
rwhensheseesme.

“
Heybaby
,”shesay
swi
thasmi
l
eonherf
ace.Shemakesmef
eel
giddywhenshecal
l
smebaby
.

“Hey,
”Iwalkuptoherunt
ilI
’
m standi
ngi
nfrontofherthenIswi
ngherchai
raroundt
of acet
he
beaut
ifulv
iew.AsIst
andbehindherIgi
veherashouldermassage.Shemoansandsinksback
i
ntoit
.

“
So,Iwasthi
nking,
whydon’
tyoucomeov
ert
omypl
acef
ordi
nner
.”Shef
reezes.Icancl
ear
ly
t
ell
sheisshocked.

“Okay,
”sheissti
ll
hesi
tanti
tsevidentint
hewayshedr
agstheokay.It
urnherchai
rar
oundto
faceme.Whi l
eIstr
aggl
eherlap.Iknowshecanhandl
eit
.Shemightbesli
m butshei
sfit
.She
placesherhandsonmyassandpul l
smecloser
.

“Justt
hetwoofus,
”Icont
inue.“
Me,
you,
dinner
,goodwi
neandmybed.
”Herey
esgl
i
stenwi
th
unshedtear
s.

“
Okay
,”shecl
ear
shert
hroatasi
tbr
eaks.“I
’
lli
nfor
m Sazi
ofourpl
ans.
”

“
Hewon'
tmi
ndandi
thi
?”

“
Nohewon'
t,
”herey
esar
egl
owi
ng.
“Oneotherthi
ng.Youlookbeaut
if
ul,
”Isaycur
li
ngherbehi
ndherear
.Shebl
ushes.Sheseemst
o
bedoingthatalotl
atel
y.Whichi
sweird.

“
Youar
edoi
ngt
hemostt
oday
,”shesay
s.

“It
’sbeenal ongweek.Ihav emi
ssedyou.”Shesmi lesandpul l
smyheaddownwhi l
el ooking
i
nt omyey es.Therear esomanyemot i
onsr efl
ectedi nhersasshepl aceshersof tlipsonmi ne.
Icapturethem andr eturnt heki
ss.I
t’
sslow, deepandohsosweet .Whenshesl ipst het i
pof
hertonguei nsideIslantmyheadsi deway stoaccommodat eher .Thent heki
ssi ntensifi
es.Her
tongueexpl oresmymout hwhil
emineglidesagai nsthers.Icanf eelourbreat
hingchangi ng.My
netherregionsar egetti
ngwar mer.Hercellphoner ings.Wepul lapartandshepi cksi tup.My
handgoest oheronebr eastandIpi
nchherni pple.Shesuppr essesamoan.

“Babe,”sheclearshert
hroat
.Hear
ingthati
t’
sSazionthel
ineIupmypace.Iunbut
tonher
blouseunti
lherredbraisrev
eal
edthenIpul
loutherni
ppl
e,benddownandcurlmytongue
aroundit.

“Yes,
”sheissli
ght
lypant
ing.“
Imeanno,noneedforl
unch.
”ShelooksdownonmeasIsuckon
herhardenedni
ppl
e.“Nobabe, I
’
mfine!What
!Okay,
”shesi
lent
lyswearsassheputt
hephone
onspeaker.

“
Hel
l
oLona,
”hi
svoi
ceboomsf
rom t
hespeaker
.Il
etgoofherni
ppl
e.

“
HeySazi
”

“I
t’
syouthathasmywi
feal
lhotandbot
hered,
”the‘
wife’
ref
erencedoesn'
tgounnoti
cedev
en
Mondel
ooksawkwardf
orasecond.Butthenheisusedtor
efertoherashiswi
fe.

“
I’
mtr
yingt
o.”

“Herni
ppl
esareyourbestbetf
oraqui
ckrel
i
ef,
alt
ernat
ebet
weenhar
dandsof
tst
rokes,
”he
drawl
swit
hhisvoicedroppi
nganoct
ave.
“
I’
vegott
his,
”Isaybr
eat
hil
y.

“
Ibety
oudo.Letmel
eav
eyout
oit
.”Hehangsup.

“
Ishegoi
ngt
obeOkay
?”Iask.

“
WhoSazi
?Ofcour
sehewi
l
lbe.
”

“
Monde,
arey
ousur
e?Hav
eyouspokent
ohi
m abouti
trecent
ly?
”shef
rowns.

“Jawedi
d,j
ustbefor
eweputt heoff
ertoyou.Whyareyouwor
ri
ed?Didhesaysomet
hing?
”she
seemsworr
iednow.Ituckherbr
eastbackinsi
deofherbr
aandbut
tonuphershi
rt
.

“
Justaconcer
n.”

“Okay.I
’
llspeakt
ohi
m somemor
e.Buty
oushoul
dn’
twor
ry.Hei
scool
.”Inodmyheadandper
k
herli
ps.

“Okay
.CanIleav
eearl
ythent
ogopr
epar
efory
ourv
isi
t?”Thewor
ryev
apor
atesandi
srepl
aced
byhersweetsmil
e.

“
Okay
.It
snotapr
obl
em butwhatdoy
ouhav
epl
annedf
orme?
”

“
It
’sasur
pri
se,
”Isayget
ti
ngofherl
apandf
ixi
ngmyski
rt
.

“
Ili
ket
hesoundoft
hat
.Shoul
dIbr
ingany
thi
ng?
”

“
No,
justy
oursexysel
f.
”Igi
veheraqui
ckki
ssandl
eav
eherof
fi
ce.

“
Thatsmi
l
e!What
’sgoi
ngonwi
thy
oul
atel
y?”Fi
siwest
art
lesmeoutofmyr
ever
ie.

“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”If
eigni
gnor
ance.Ut
handi
ndabal
osi
si.
“
Youar
eal
way
swal
ki
ngar
oundwi
thasi
l
lygr
inony
ourf
acel
atel
y.Uy
ajol
aneh?
”

“Nobani
?Menarethefar
thestt
hingonmymi
ndFi
fi
.I’
m al
laboutmeandmyki
ds.
”Ipi
ckupmy
bagandcal
lanUber.

“
Mhm, i
fyousayso.ButIknowsomet
hingorsomeonei
smaki
ngy
ousmi
l
eli
keani
diot
.”Shei
s
l
ooki
ngatmesuspici
ously.

“
Youri
magi
nat
ioni
srunni
ngwi
l
d.By
e.I
’
mtaki
ngahal
fday
,”Isaywal
ki
ngt
owar
dst
heel
evat
ors.

“Yousee!That’
syoursecondhal
fdayi
nlesst
hant
woweeks.
”Sheshout
saf
terme.The
elev
atordoor
sopen.

“
ByeFifi
.SeeyouonMonday.
”Thedoorcl
osesbef
oreshecouldrespond.I
fevershewer
eto
f
indoutaboutmyarr
angement
.MondeandIwouldbethegossipofthisbui
ldi
ng.

Ifi
rstdosomegr oceryshoppingbef
oregoinghome.I
’m notdoi
nganyt
hingfancyj
ustpl
anni
ng
ongr i
l
lingthemeat,r
oastsweetpotatoandaGreeksal
ad.Ibuyachocolat
ecakeaswellfor
desert.Ist
ockuponmor ewineandI’
m goodtogo.

Thehousei scleanjustneedssometi
dingup.IdothatassoonasIgethome.I’
vewast edabit
ofti
meatt hemal l
.It’
salmost4pm andI’
m expect
ingMondeby7pm.SoIhav ejustunder
thr
eehourst oprepare.OnceI’
m donewitht
hecleaningupwhichtakesl
ongert
hanant i
cipat
ed
becauseIhadt ochanget hel
ineni
nmybedr oom.Iputthemeatintheovenaswellasthe
sweetpotatothengof orashower.

Ideci
deonasexyarmygr
eenshir
tdr
ess.Offt
heshoul
derwi
thbi
gsl
eeves.I
tdoesn't
accommodat
eabr aandt
hati
sthedi
rect
ionIwasai
mingfor
.Asi
mpleburgundysandal
complet
est
helook.

It
’salmost7pm, di
nnerisreadyandmysmal ldi
ningtablei
sset
.Winebottl
eopenedwi
thtwo
glassesalr
eadyfil
l
ed.I’
m nervousall
ofasudden.Ireall
ywantt
oimpressher.I
stoomuch?Or
evenwor sealetdown.Gosh!Hav en’
ttr
iedt
owooany oneasi
nfor
ever.Cometothi
nkofi
t,I
’
ve
nev
ermadeanyef
for
tforany
onebef
ore.

Thedoorbel
lringsandIt
akeherthroughsecuri
ty.Shedoesn'
thavethecl
ear
anceSazidoest
o
comet hr
oughunannounced.Ihavetofi
xthat.Mypalmsar eget
ti
ngsweat
yandmyhear ti
s
thuddi
ngagainstmychest.GoodnessLona,r
elax.Thi
sisMonde.YourMonde.Ther
eisaknock
atthedoorandIruntoopen.

Fuckme!I
’
m moment
ari
l
yst
unned.

“
Hey
”shesoundsner
voust
oo.Sounl
i
keher
.

“Hi”I
’m sti
llhol
dingthedoor.Wear estaringateachother.“
Youlookhot.
”that
'sallIcanthink
of.Butshedoesandmor einapi nkfloraldr
essifyoucouldcal
litt
hat.Thebott
om partisheld
byaf ewst r
ingstothebrassierpar
t.It’
saboobt ubedresswhi
chleavesalmosttheenti
reback
bare.Itgoesallt
hewayt othef l
oor.Iknowshei swearingfl
atshoesbecauseweal mostthe
samehei ght.Herhairi
scurlyandleftloose.Looksalmostwet.Nomakeupexceptf oral i
p
glossthatgiveherli
psthatentici
ngwetl ook.

“
MayIcomei
n?”shesnapsmeoutofmyogl
i
ng.

“
Ofcour
se.Mymanner
s!I
’
m sorr
y.”Ishi
ftt
othesi
det
oletheri
n.Shehasabouquetoff
lower
s
i
nonehandandabot
tl
eofwineontheother.

“
Thesear
efory
ou,
”shesay
spassi
ngt
hem t
ome.

“Thankyou.Theyar
ebeauti
ful
.
”Isni
fft
heflowers.Pur
ebli
ss.“
Letmeputthem i
nwat
er.
”I
quickl
yfindavaseandputt
hem i
none.Sheislooki
ngaroundt
heplace.

“
Thi
sisabeaut
if
ulpl
ace.I
t’
ssui
tsy
ouandi
t’
shasenoughspacef
ort
heki
dst
orunar
ound,
I
l
i
ke.
”

“
Iknowhey
.”Iwal
ktowar
dsheandpul
lheri
nmyar
msf
orahug.She’
sret
urnsi
t.

“
Mhhh.I
’
m sohappyy
ouar
eher
e,”Isayagai
nstherneck.
“
Metoobaby.Yousmel
lsogood,
”shesay
st aki
ngawhi
ff
.Thener
veshav
ecal
m downabi
t.I
l
eadhert
othedini
ngt
abl
eandpassheraglassofwi
ne.

“
Youwental
lout
,”shesay
staki
ngasi
p.

“
Myai
mist
opl
easey
ou.
”Isaywat
chi
ngherabov
ether
im ofmywi
negl
ass.

“Ilovethesoundoft hat.Ialsointendtor eci

procat
e.”Thet
ête-à-t
êtecont i
nuesthroughout
dinneraccompaniedbysex yanddel i
catetoucheshereandthere.Byt heti
medi nneristhr
ough
I
’m bur ni
ngupwithneed.Il ov ewat chi
nghert al
k.Wespeakaboutev eryt
hingandany t
hing.
Whatmakesusl augh, cry,
sadort i
ck.Shei sabsol
utel
yfuntobear ound.Herhumouri ssubtle
j
ustl i
keSazi.Sheismor er atchetthanonewoul dassume.I’
m scar edt onamet hefeeli
ngthati
s
bur st
ingfr
om within.

Wehav elongmov edtotheloungeaft

erdinneraswesti
llcont
inuewit
hourconv er
sat
ion.
Kumnandi man.I’
m happy.Sheishappy.Wear esi
tt
ingverycl
osetoeachother.Shehasone
l
egf ol
dedont hecouchwithherheadproppedupagainstherhand.I
’
mf ul
l
yrelaxedagainstt
he
couchfacingher.

“Ar
eyoutel
li
ngme,you’
veneverbeenwithawomanev er?Notev
eninUni
ver
sit
y?”we’
vebeen
att
hisf
orthepastf
ewmi nut
es.Shethi
nksI’
m hol
dingoutonher.

“
Youar
emyf
ir
stser
iousl
y,
”Ican’
thel
pbutl
ookatherl
i
psasshesmi
l
es.

“
Icoul
dnev
ert
ell
.Youar
eanent
husi
ast
icv
irgi
n,
”shet
eases.Il
augh.

“
WhatcanIsay
,youbr
ingoutt
henaught
yinme.Whowasy
ourf
ir
st?
”

“Myf i
rst
?Wel lcontr
ar yt
opopularbeli
efIwasn' tasexperi
encedbeforeImetRoxanne.Iwas
wi l
dont heoutsiderebel
li
ousevenbutv eryreservedontheinsi
de.IknewIli
kedbothsexes
from earlyon.Ihadaf ewgir
lf
ri
endsinhi ghschool nothi
ngmuchwasdone.Wewer eallj
ust
explori
ng.Ihadast eadyboyfri
endinmymat ri
cy ear.Hewasaf amil
yfri
endbutwenev er
reachedt hi
rdbase.Webr okeupaftermat ri
cbecausehi sfamil
ymov edtoLondonsoitwasn’
t
goingt owork.IwasheartbrokenuntilImetRoxanne.Itwasawhirl
windromance.Wedi dn'
t
hav etohideanythi
ng.Itwasjustl
iberati
ng.BecauseIwasav i
rgi
nshewasscar edt ouse
penet r
ati
vetoys.Sowedi deveryt
hingbutpenetrati
ngandIlov
edit.Wewer eyoung,freeand
fabulous,
”shechuckles.Unti
lImetSazi .Iknewthefir
stti
meIproperl
ylai
dmyey esonhi mt hat
Ilovedhim.Couldn’tdoanythi
ngabouti tforawhil
ebecauseIwasl oy
altoRoxy.Wel l
unt i
lthat
fatefulni
ghtwhenwebot hsuccumbedt oourdesiresandhebrokemyv ir
gini
ty.
”

“
Ohwow.Sohewasyourf
ir
st?Whatasweetst
ory
.AndnowI
’
myourf
ir
st.Yousee,
itwas
meantt
obe,
”Ij
oke

“
Ijustfeart
hattoyout
hisisjustanexper
iment
alphaset
hough.Youknow.I
’
vel
i
vedt
ypeof
t
hing.”Shecri
nkl
eshernose.Cute.

“
It
’smorethant
hat.
”Shelooksupatme.I
’
m sur
pri
sedmy
sel
fbutnowt
hatIt
hinkabouti
t,i
tis.I
j
ustdon’
twantt
olabeli
t.

“
Okay,
”shewhisper
s.I
’
m gl
adshedoesn'
tpr
yfur
ther
.Shej
ustl
eansf
orwar
dunt
ilourf
acesar
e
i
nchesapar
t.

“I’
l
ltakethat
.”Hereyesarescanningmine.Ther
eisheati
nthem.Il
eanf
orwar
dandmeetheri
n
beauti
ful
sensualki
ss.It
’ssl
ow, gent
lyandful
lofneed.

“It
hinkweneedtotakethi
stothebedroom.”Ilovethatshelet
’smebei nchargetoday.She
j
ustnodsherhead.Takesahugegulpofherwi neandplacetheglassonthecoff
eetable.Ido
thesame.Mynervesareback.Iwonderi
fI’
l
l beabletopleaseherthewayIwantto.IhopeI
don’tf
umbl
eandmessup.

Icanfeelherpresencebehindmeasshefoll
owsmet othebedroom.I’
veusedt
hesidel
amps
soitsdi
ml yl
itcreat
inganinvi
ti
ngandromanti
cambiance.Onceinsi
deItur
ntoherandgent
ly
placemyhandsi nherwaist.Theycomei
ntocont
actwithherbareski
n.

“
I’
m ner
vous,
”Ibl
urtout
.Okay
.Iwasact
ual
l
ythi
nki
ngi
tnotpl
anni
ngonsay
ingi
t.

“Real
ly
, Ican’
ttel
l
.Noneedtobet hough.Iwantthisasmuchasy oudopluswe’v
edonethis
befor
e,”sherespondsasherf
ingerscaressthesideofmyfacethenshebunchesmyhairint
oa
fi
stasshepul l
smet owar
dsher.Whenourl i
psmeetal l
nervousnessdi
ssi
pat
esandIfeel.
Ifeel herev erywher e.Thi ski sshaspur pose.I t’
sent ici
ng,seductiv
eandf ullofpromi sesasI
respondj ustaseager l
y.Wet aketurnsst r
ippingeachot herwellitdoesn' tr eall
yt akemuch
effort.Ther eisn’
tmucht ot akeof f.Wear ebot hst andinginfrontofeachot hernaked.Wi t
hher
slim, li
theandl i
ghti ncompl exionf i
gure.Mi nesl i
ghtlydarkercompl exionandwi thmorecurves.
Ilovehersl enderf rame.Herski nissmoot hwi thoutanyi mper f
ections.Myey esr oam herbody
from herbr eastwhi char eper kyandpoi nt
edt owar dsme.Theyhar denf urtherasIcont i
nueto
l
ookather .Myonehandt r
ailshersof tskinfollowingmyey emov ement .Herbr eat hhit
chesin
hert hroatasIgr azeherhar denedni pple.Myey est rail
downherf l
atnav elandIci r
cleherbel
ly
ri
ngwi ththet ipofmyf i
nger .Islowlyinchdownt ohermound.Shei scleanshav enwi t
hjusta
smal lvneat l
ypat chl eadi ngt oherhoodedt reasur e.Sheissexyasf uck.AsIcuphermoundI
easilyslidemymi ddl efingeropeni ngherl abia.Shewhi mpers.Ilovet hatshei sr educedt oa
statue.Shei sjustst andi ngt her eall
owingmef reereigntoherbody .Shei sal r
eadywetdown
there.Ici rclemyf ingerar oundhert i
p,teasingherabi t
.ThenIslideal lthewayi nside.

“Mhhhh, Babe,
”shewhispers.Holdi
ngontomef orbalance.Igoinandoutofherwi th
del
iberatestr
okes.Shewidensherlegsal
lowingmebet teraccess.Ibendmyheadt aki
ngones
pebblednipplei
nmymout hswirl
ingmytonguear oundit.Shebecomesmor edrenchedi
nher
netherregi
on.Hermoansar elouderandherbreathingislaboured.Herresponsehasmeturned
on.

Ialt
ernatewit
hherbr east
sunt i
lI’
m sati
sfiedandherni ppl
esar eashardasr ocks.Shehasa
rosyfl
ushspreadingthroughoutherbody .Ilov ehowresponsivesheis.Ipullmywetf i
ngerout
ofherandbr i
ngittomymout h,sucki
ngitcl ean.Hereyesareglazedov erwitharousal
.She
l
ooksl i
kesheisaboutt opassoutasshewat chesmeluckthef i
ngerclean.Igentl
ypushheron
thebedandf ol
lowheroni t.Sheisnowonherbackwi thherlegsopen.Herpussyi sgl
ist
eni
ng
withherjui
ces.Fuck!Igetmor ewetatthesi ght.Whoknewt hatasightofwetpussywoul dtur
n
meont hi
smuch.Myownpussyi spulsating.

Iki
ssheral
ongherleguptoheri
nnert
highsandal
ter
nat
ingbet
weent
hem butav
oidi
ngher
pussy
.Sheissqui
rmingal
lput
tyi
nmyhands.

Finall
yIr unmyf i
ngersthroughheropensex.Openi ngupherhoodedlipsandexposi ngher
engor gedandpr otr
udingclit
.Herasslif
tsf r
om thebedseeki ngmorefri
cti
on.Isl
ightlybl
owon
herandshel et’
soutay elp.Sheisonfir
e.It’
sbackf ir
ingthough.Mywholebodyisf ull
ycharged.
Icircl
ehercl i
twithatipofmyt ongueandIam r ewardedbyherscream.WhenI ’v
ehadenough
teasingIst ar
teati
ngherpussyi near
nest.Sheisletti
ngoutincoher
entsounds.Myf ingeri
s
curledupi nsi
degr i
ppedbyherpussywal ls.Idon’
tletuponag- spotI
'
ml ikeadogwi t
habone.
Istopj ustbefor
esher eleases.Shewhimper sinprotest.
“
Ohbabydon’
tst
opIwassocl
ose,
”shebegs.

“Nahbaby ,
wear enotdone.I’
vegotanev enbett
eridea.Somet hi
ngIdiscoveredandgi v
esboth
ofussomuchpl easur
e.”Isayallt
hiswhil
eI’
m positi
oningus.Ihav eherlegscrossingmineina
sci
ssoringpositi
onasourv ul
vascomei ntocontactinani nti
matekiss.Il
ookf orabett
er
posit
ionuntilIfi
nditthenIstartgyrat
ingmyhipsagai nsther.Wear ebothmoani ngnon-st
op
andbothdr enchedandt hatprovi
desthenecessarylubricati
onwhichenhancesourpl easur
e
beyondexpect at
ion.Icanhardlybreat
he.

I’
m abouttocum andIcant el
lshei
sclose.Ireachf
orherbr
eastandplaywi
thit.I
nnoti
meour
bodiesarel
ockedtightaswecl i
max.I
t’
sawetmessdownt her
e.Fuck!Il
ovetr
ibbi
ng.Webot
h
coll
apseonourbacks.Wi t
hourbodiescoveredinasheenofsweat.

“Baby
,thatwasbeaut
if
ul,
”shesay saft
erawhileascrawl
st owar dsme.Sheispract
ical
l
yly
ing
ontopofme.Herfaceisfl
ushed.Ijustsmi
le.Mybodyisstill
tingli
ng.“Don’
tpassoutonme
now.Wehav eal
ongnightahead.Iwanttoowny ouLonaLinamandl aSomlotha.
”

I
’
m doomed.

Chapt
er22

“
Wear
etwel
ve-
bil
l
ionl
i
ghty
ear
sfr
om t
heedge.

That
'saguess,

Noonecanev
ersayi
t'
str
ue,

ButIknowt
hatIwi
l
lal
way
sbewi
thy
ou.

I
'
m war
medbyt
hef
ir
eofy
ourl
oveev
eryday
.

Sodon'
tcal
lmeal
i
ar,

Justbel
i
eveev
ery
thi
ngt
hatIsay
..
.

Ther
ear
esi
x-bi
l
li
onpeopl
eint
hewor
ld.

Mor
eorl
ess,
Andi
tmakesmef
eel
qui
tesmal
l
,

Buty
ou'
ret
heoneIl
ovet
hemostofal
l
.

We'
rehi
ghonawi
rewi
tht
hewor
ldi
noursi
ght
,

AndI
'
llnev
ert
ir
e,

Oft
hel
ovet
haty
ougi
vemeev
eryni
ght
.

Ther
ear
eni
ne-
mil
l
ionbi
cycl
esi
nBei
j
ing.

That
'saf
act
,

I
t'
sat
hingwecan'
tdeny
,

Li
ket
hatf
actt
hatIwi
l
llov
eyou'
ti
lIdi
e.

Andt
her
ear
eni
ne-
mil
l
ionbi
cycl
esi
nBei
j
ing,

AndIknowt
hatIwi
l
llov
eyou'
ti
lIdi
e.”
-Kat
ieMel
ua

It
’sthef
oll
owi ngdayandI’
m oncl
oudninedr
ivi
nghome.Ihadaper
fecteveni
ng.Mymind
keepspl
ay i
ngbackt heev
entsoft
heprevi
ouseveni
ngandIcanbar
elycontai
nmyexci
tement
.It
wasperfectineveryway.

Iwalkint
ot hehouseandfindSazi
int
helivi
ngroom pl
ayi
ngt
hePl
ayStat
ion.Iwal
kstr
aightt
o
hi
m andstraggl
ehislap.Onlyt
henhereal
i
sesthatsomeonei
sint
heroom.Heget sl
i
ket hat
wi
thhisgamesatt imes.

“
Babe,
y ouj
ustmademel
ose.
”Hepl
acesthecont
rol
l
eront
hesi
deandwr
apshi
sar
msar
ound
mywaistwhi
lemi
negoar
oundhi
sneck.

“
Goodmor
ningbaby
,”Isay
.

“
Goodmor
ningl
ove.Di
dyouhav
eagoodev
eni
ng?
”

“YesIdid,
”Ipull
him cl
oseri
ntoanembr
aceandhi
sarmsti
ght
en.“I
’mi
nlove.
”Iwhi
speragai
nst
hisneck.Heloosenshi
sgripandpul
l
sbackl
ooki
ngatme.Hetucksmyhai
rbehi
ndmyear .

“
Aresur
e?”t
her
eisnot
hingbutl
ovei
nhi
sey
es.Inodmyhead.ThenImyey
esst
ingwi
th
unshedt
ear
s.

“Thenwhydoyoul
ooksomi
ser
abl
e?”hei
scuppi
ngmyf
acewi
thbot
hhands.Al
onet
ear
escapesmyey
e.

“
It
’st
oosoon.I
’
m goi
ngt
oloseher
.Icanf
eel
it.
”Hewi
pesmyt
earwi
thhi
sthumb.

“Youwon't
,”hereassur
esme.“ I
’
mtheonewhofeel
sli
keI
’
m goi
ngtol
oseyou.
”Myhear
t
const
ri
ctsatthatrevel
ati
on.I
fheonl
yknewt
hatther
ewasnoMondewit
houtSazi
.

“Youwi
llnev
erloseme.Youar
emyhear
tandwi
thouty
ounot
hingel
semakessense.
”He
smil
esandpull
smecloser.

“Youar
emyheartt
ooandwewil
lmaket
hiswor
k.Li
nai
sher
etocompl
etet
hepuzzl
enott
o
breaki
t.Mh.
”Hi
seyesscanmyf
ace.

“
Ja.Tel
lmet
hough,
baby
.Howdoy
ouf
eel
?Behonest
,it
’st
heonl
yway
.”Hesi
ghsasher
ubs
myarms.

“
ImustbehonestI
’
m scar
edt
oo.
”Myey
eswi
den.

“Thisisnewf orbothofus.Feel i
ngsareinvol
vedandt hat’
sthefuckeduppar t.Before,Iknew
thati
twouldbej ustforyou,youknowoncei t
’sdonei t’sdone.Wemov eon.Ther eismor eat
stakethi
stime.Lina,herkids,youandme.I nev eryt
hingIdomyl oveInev erwantt olosey ou.
Wheny ouarehappyI ’m happy.Myj obasamani stoseet hatyouarehappyandy ouhav eall
thatyourheartdesi
res.What ’
swei r
disthatI’
mf all
i
ngf orhertoobutseeingy ouwi t
hhermakes
mehappy .It
’sthebestofbot h.Wecanhav eitallbaby .Orwecanl oseitall.
”Ishudderatt hat
l
aststatement.Thatiswher emyf earli
es.

Whycan’twej
ustlett
hingsf
low?Takei
tonedayatat
ime.Whydowehav
etocompl
i
cat
e
t
hings.I
t’
ssi
mple.Let
’sli
vei
nthemoment.

Whoam Iki
ddi
ngt
hough?I
t’
snotaseasyast
hat
.Notany
mor
eanddef
ini
tel
ynoti
nthi
scase.
Mychestf
eel
sti
ghtwi
tht
heemot
ionsov
ercomi
ngme.

“Let
’stakeitonedayatat
imeandnotov
ert
hinkorcompl
i
cat
ethi
ngs,
”IsayasIbendandgi
ve
him akiss.

“
Thi
sisy
ousi
mpl
i
fyi
ngt
hings?
”hesay
spushi
nghi
shar
der
ect
ionagai
nstmymound.

“Youareoneinami
ll
i
on.Youaremyl over
,mybestfr
iendandaboveal
lmysoul mate.
”Hi
seyes
getheatedashi
smemberfur
therhar
dens.Iguesshereal
lyneededt
hereassur
ance.Hepul
l
s
myheaddownandcaptur
esmyl ipswit
hhisi
nasultr
ykiss.

Thekissgetsheatedi nnotime.Hemanoeuv reshishandbet

weenus, takesouthi shar d
memberandpushesmypant i
esasideandIsi nkint
ohim.Webot hsighagainsteachot her
’sl
ips.
Thekississl
owbutf ull
ofpassionaswebot hpourourheart
sandsoul sintoit.Icanf eelhi
s
heavybreat
hingmi ngli
ngwi t
hmi neasIgrindintohim.Ourpel
vicbonesar eincont actandthat
j
ustaddsmor edeliciousfri
cti
on.Heisthrusti
ngupmeet ingmyt hr
ustsaswegetl ostineach
other
’sarms.Thereisnooneel sebuthi
mi nthatmoment .If
eelhim everywhere.Insideofme,
deepinmycor easmyv agi
nawal l
scont
ractagainsthisl
onglength.Webot hgroanbutt he
sweetkissconti
nues.

Asmymuscl escontract,
Ifeelmytoescurlandmybodyi sovercomebywr eckingshudders
andIscr
eam againsthisli
ps.Icanfeel
him hardenfur
therandspil
lsdeepinside.Hi
sar mlocks
aroundmywaistaswebot hri
dethewav eofourorgasm.Event
uallyhel et
sgoofmyl i
psand
l
oosenshisgri
p.Wear ebot hpant
ingandyetthiswasgentlel
ov emaking.

“
Ilov
eyou,
”hesay
s.

“
Ilov
eyou,
”Iwhi
sper
.

I
t’
stwohour
slat
erandwehav
ejustf
ini
shedt
aki
ngashower
.

“
Babe,
your
emembert
hatLonahast
oseet
heki
dst
oday
?”Iaskhi
mfr
om mycl
oset
.

“
Iknow,
isshesl
eepi
ngov
er?
”her
espondsf
rom t
hebedr
oom.
“Ithi
nki
t’
sbest
.Thatwaysheget
stospendmor
eti
mewi
tht
hem.Thatmeansy
ouwi
l
lal
so
sleepov
er.
”

“Icancomebackandfetchhertomorrow.
”Iwal
koutoft
hecl
osetandf
indhi
m br
ushi
nghi
s
shorthai
r.Ist
andbehi
ndhim andlookathi
mthr
oughthemi
rr
or.

“Babe,i
t’
sokaytospendt
imewit
hher.Theki
dswi
l
llov
ethatev
enmor
e.”Hedoesn’
tsay
anythi
ngbutconti
nueswi
thhi
shair
.

“
Whatwi
l
lyoudobyy
our
sel
fint
hishouse?
”heasksaf
terawhi
l
e.

“I
’
llfi
nal
l
yv isi
tmydadbeforehedi
sownsme.May be,aft
erwar
dsgetmy sel
foffwiththei
mages
ofyoutwot oget
her
.Seei
ngy ouwi
thherdoessomethingtome,”Iwhi
speragainsthi
searand
watchhim ashisey
esdarken.

“
Wedon'
thav
eti
met
oexpl
orey
ourt
hought
s,”hesay
sinhi
sdeepert
one.

“Thereisnosuchthi
ngasnothav i
ngtime,wecanalway smaket i
me,”IsaywhileIrubhis
erecti
onthr
oughhissweatpant
s.Andwepr oceedt
omaket i
me.Ashet ort
uresmybody .He
l
eav esanimpri
ntofhi
sloveineverypartofmybody .Bytheti
mehel eavesI’
m sati
atedand
unabletomove.Ideci
detosuccumbt omynapbef or egoingtomyfather’
s.

Lona

I
sitpossi
bletodief
rom happi
ness.I’
vebeenf
loati
ngoncloudninesincewaki
ngup.Mynight
wi
thMondewasmor ethanIanti
cipat
ed.I
twasbeautif
ul,
sensualandfil
l
edwit
hheartst
opping
moments.Ifeel
li
keweconnectedonadeeperl ev
el.Morespi
ri
tual.

Alit
tl
efearcr
eepsi natthatthough.Whyam Icomplicati
ngthi
ngs?Thisissupposedtobefun
notcompli
cated.ButIcan’thelpthesmil
ethatkeepscreepi
ngin.Il
ovegetti
ngt oknowheron
thatl
evel
.Il
oveev ery
thi
ngabouther .Herbody,hesmile,
soundofherlaughterandmost
i
mpor t
antl
yIlovehermind.
Ooooht
her
eist
oomanyl oveinmyst
rongoft hough.Unfort
unat
elyIcan’
treducemyf
eel
i
ngs
t
oamereword,
li
ke.Fuck,Ithi
nkI
’
m screwed.IknowI’m scr
ewed.

I
’
m dressedandreadytogo.Theexci
tementofseei
ngmykidsandspendingmoretimewi
th
t
hem overr
idesev
eryt
hingel
se.St
il
lbusywithmythought
smyphonerings.It
’sSazi
.

“
Hel
l
o,”Ianswer
.

“
Ngi
l
angaphandl
e,
”hesay
s.

“I’
m coming.
”Ihangupandgetmyov erni
ghtbag.Ifi
ndhimleani
ngagai
nstt
hebonnetoft
he
carwithhisar
msf oldedandl
egscrossed.Hestrai
ghtenst
hemomentheseesmeandwal ks
towardsme.Hest opsafewinchesfr
om me.

“
Hel
l
oLi
na,
”hesay
s.

“
Hell
oSazi,
”Ialmostwhisper.Thenhesuddenl
ypul
l
smeint
ohisarmsandmynost
ri
lsar
efi
l
led
wi
thhisheavenl
yscent
.Hel etsgoandgrabsmybagwhi
chhaddroppedont
hegr
ound.

“
Howar
eyou?
”heaskswhi
l
stopeni
ngt
hedoorf
orme.

“I
’
m good,gr
eatactual
l
y.”Hewidenshi
sey
esbutIcanseeahi
ntofasmi
l
eonhi
sface.He
cl
osesthedoorandgoestoplacemybagi
ntheboot.

“
Feel
i
nggr
eathey
,”hesay
sthemomentheget
sin.I
shef
ishi
ng?It
aket
hebai
t.

“
Ifeel
wonder
ful
,
”hest
eal
sal
ookatmebutInot
ice.

Hedr
ivesoutoft
hecompl
exandnav
igat
esi
ntot
heSat
urdayt
raf
fi
c.

“
Youar
egl
owi
ngt
oo,
”hesay
s.
“Iknow.Lastni
ghtwasbeaut i
fulandthismorningevenbet
ter
.Thennowbeingwithyou,
onmy
wayt oseethekids.Ihav
emi ssedyou.”Itj
ustcomesout.Unf
il
ter
edandit
’sthet
ruth.He
doesn’tsayany
thingbutsuddenlysl
owsdownpar ksonthesi
deofther
oad.

“Whyarewe...
”Idon’
tfini
shmysentenceashesilencesmewithhi
sli
ps.Imoanagai
nsthisli
ps
andreci
procat
e.Icanfeelhi
sfi
nger
sdi ggi
ngint
omyscal pasheangl
esmyheadwhilehisli
ps
rav
ageme.Hepul lsbackaft
erawhil
e.Het henbreaksi
ntoahugegri
n.

“I
’
vemissedy outoo.”Myhear tlur
ches.Hest ar
tsthecarandhedr i
v esof
f.We’v
edecidedona
dri
vet
othef arm.Ittakesatleastthreehoursbutit
’sseemsshorter.Theri
dehasbeenf i
ll
ed
wit
hli
ghtandcr azyconv er
sati
ons, l
aughterandsomer i
dicul
oussingalongs.Il
oveseeingthi
s
si
deofSazi.Mor erelaxed.

Whenwegett oBheki ’
sf arm myattenti
onistakenoverbythekids.Thest oriestheytellme,I
can’
tevencatchabr eath.Theyarehappyt oseebothofus.Wet alkandpl ayuntili
t’
sdinner
ti
meandt henwear eal lt
ogetheratdinnerwi
thSane’smunchki ns.Dinnerisal oudaffair
.What
i
sweirdisthatthekidshav estoppedaskingaboutTsiet
si.I
’m notsur ewhet herit
sabl essi
ng
butwhateveritisI
’
mr eli
eved.Havingtoexpl
ainwherethecowar dofaf atherhasdisappeared
towouldbeamammot htask.I
fitwasupt ome, Iwi
shhecoulddi sappearforever.

It
’sal
mostmi dni
ghtandallthekidshavefinal
lysuccumbedandpassedoutont hesof
as.Sazi
fi
rsttakesSane’
skidstotheirrespect
iver
ooms.Whenhei sdone,
hefindsmewi thNt
hati
sii
n
myar msandhet akesKgothatso.Theybothshareabedroom whichIdon'tt
hinkwasmeantfor
ki
ds.It’
shugewithakingsizebedi nthecentr
e.Anef f
orthasbeenmadet ocreat
eachil
d
envi
ronment.Wit
hwal lar
tandt oyseverywhere.

Wegent
lypl
acet
hem ont
hebedandIcr
awl
nextt
othem andf
all
int
oadr
eaml
esssl
eep.

Iwakeupt henextmorningonanemptybed.Igetupanddeci
detoshowerbef orefi
ndi
ngwhere
every
oneis.WhenI’m doneIfol
l
owthenoisethat’
scomingf
rom theothersoundofthehouse.
Thishousesishugeandairy.Wi
thnat
ural
lightf
rom al
mostever
yangle.It
’speacef
ulhere.

Ifol
l
owt henoisei
ntoabeauti
fulkit
chen.Thesightt
hatmeetsmewhenIwalkini
s,disastr
ous,
theonl
ywayt odescri
beit
.Theisflourever
ywhere.Onthef
loor
,count
ert
ops,t
hekids,Sazi
.It
’s
amess.Thekitchentabl
ehasast ackofpancakesonit.

“
Mor
ningev
ery
one,
”Isay
.Theki
dsal
lrunt
omeandputt
hei
rmessyhandsal
lov
erme.Il
ookat
Sazi
Sashandhej
ustshr
ugshi
sshoul
der
s.

“Breakfastisready,
”hesay s.Ij
ustshakemyhead.Weal lsitandenjoythepancakes.Theyare
actuall
ygood.Ther eisalsoaf r
eshlysqueezedf r
uitj
uicebutIoptf ormycoffee.Aft
erbr eakf
ast
weal lhelpcleanupandt hekidsgobat h.Wepr epareapi cnicbasketaswedecidetot akethem
outforapi cnic.Thi
swi l
lal
sogiveThehel persti
met or est.Thefarmisbigenoughthaty oucan
picnicinitandf or
getthatyouareev eninafarm.

“
Thi
spl
acei
ssotr
anqui
l
.Iwoul
dn’
tmi
ndl
i
vingher
e,”Isayaswewat
cht
heki
dspl
ayi
ngwhi
l
e
wel
ayont
hebl
anket
.

“
Ilov
ecomi
ngher
e.I
t’
stoopeacef
ul,
”hesay
s.

“
I’
m cr
ushedwehavet
ogoback.I
t’
sev
enhar
derwi
thoutmyki
ds.Whenwi
l
lthi
sbeov
er?
”he
t
urnst
olookatme.

“
Soon,
Ipr
omi
se.
”Hebr
usheshi
sfi
ngeront
het
ipofmynose.Inodwi
thasmi
l
e.

“Iwantt
okissyou,
”hesays.Il
ookatthekidsandfindt
hem toobusytonoti
ce.Il
eanfor
war
d
andhemeet smehalfwayaswest ealaquickki
ss.Wequickl
ypul
lapart
.Igiggl
eandhe
chuckl
es.Heli
esonhisbackbalanci
nghisheadonhishand.Arel
axedSaziispotent
.

“
Mondewouldlov
eithere,
”Isay
.Imissherandwi
shshewasherewi
thus.I
tsuddenl
yfeel
s
i
ncompl
etewi
thouther
.Sheisli
ket
hemi ssi
ngpi
eceofapuzzl
e.

“
Shedoes.Feel
swei
rdwi
thoutherdoesn’
tit
?”heechoesmyt
hought
sashet
urnshi
shead
t
owar
dsme.

“
Iwasj
ustt
hinki
ngt
hesame.
”Hel
ooksawaybutt
akesmyhandi
nhi
s.

“
Wil
lyouspendt
heev
eni
ngwi
thus?
”
“
I'
dlov
eto.
”Heki
ssest
hebackofmyhand.Thencl
oseshi
sey
es.

Chapt
er23

“
HowdoIl
i
ve?HowdoIbr
eat
he?

Wheny
ou'
renother
eI'
m suf
focat
ing

Iwantt
ofeel
lov
e,r
unt
hroughmybl
ood

Tel
lmei
sthi
swher
eIgi
vei
tal
lup?

Fory
ouIhav
etor
iski
tal
l

'
Causet
hewr
it
ing'
sont
hewal
l
”-Sam Smi
th

Ihav
ebeenspendingmyday sf
eel
inglonel
y.MondeandSazihavegoneonsepar atebusi
ness
t
ri
psandIhadtostaybehi
ndandcatchuponat onofpaperwork.I
’v
ebeenmoodyandcr anky
t
hewholeweek.Imissmykids,
SaziandMonde.IevenmissLazolaforcr
yingoutloud.

Howdoesmyonl yf r
ienddi
sownme?Kanjani?Shewentasfaraschangi
nghernumber scan
youbeli
eve.I’
vebeenmeaningtoaskSazif
orhishel
ptodealwit
hBrianbutreal
l
ynow,howdo
Ioffl
oadall
mybur densont
otheman?May beI’
l
lspeakt
oMondeabouti t.Hel
pwitht
hatcop
fr
iendofhers.

Inothernews,I’
m ami ll
ionai
re.Thehousewasf i
nall
ysol
dandmoneyt r
ansfer
redint
omy
account.SaziandMondet ol
dmei nnouncer
tai
nt er
mtonottouchevenacentoft hatmoney .
I’
m sti
lll
iv
ingoft hefi
rstsett
lementtheTOSpai d.Mysal
aryi
sstil
luntouchedaswell.Icould
buyacarbutI ’
m av oi
dingani nst
alment
.Iwasthinki
ngofbuy
ingitcash.Nothi
ngmuchj usta
smallcartotakemef rom pointAt opoi
ntB.I’
veputali
donthatfornow.IjustuseUberf or
workandanyot herer
randsIneedt odo.

I
t’
saFr i
dayandmypeoplearecomingback.Well
Sazi gotbackinthemorningandMondewi l
l
becomingbacki
ntheafter
noon.I
’m atworkandI’
mf eeli
ngexcit
ed.I’
vemissedthem bot
h.NoI
don’
thaveascal
etoweighwhoImi ssedthemost.Theyhav ebothbecomer esi
dent
sinmy
mind.
Fi
siwehasbeencur
iousaboutmymoodthewholeday .Shesaysit
’stheopposi
teofwhatI
’
ve
beenthewhol
eweekandt her
emustbeareasonfori
t.Wel l
ther
eis,Icoul
dbegetti
ngsome
di
ckorpussyorbot
hdependingonourmood,butI
’m nottel
li
ngherallt
hat.

“
Youar
ehol
dingoutonme,
”shesay
s.

“
Ihavenot
hingt
ot el
lyou.Can’
taper
sonjustbehappy
? ,
”I’
m exasperat
ed.We’
vebeent
hrough
t
hist
hewholeday.It
’snotli
keIdi
gaboutherl
oveli
fe,shevolunt
ari
lytel
lsme.

“
Onewayort
heot
her
,thet
rut
hwi
l
lcomeout
.”Ij
ustshakemyhead.

I
t’slunchti
meandI
’m cont
empl
ati
ngtogodownstai
rst
other
estaur
ant
snearby.Ineedpr
oper
foodandit’
shar
dtocookwhenyouli
veal
one.Justt
henmyphoneri
ngsandi
t’
sSazi.Myface
breaksint
oahugegr
in.

“
Hey
,”i
magi
net
hehuski
nessofmyv
oice.

“
Wenzani
?”hi
svoi
cesendsgoosebumpsal
lov
er.

“
I’
m aboutt
ogogetl
unch.
”

“
Wozangi
l
angaphandl
e,
”hedr
awl
s.

“
Out
sidewher
e?”

“Yourworkpl
ace.I
’mtaki
ngyoutol
unch.I’
m parkedupfr
ont.”Hehangsup.Hedoesn'
taskor
anythi
ng.JustcommandsandIobeyofcourse.Ifi
ndhi
ml eani
ngagainstt
hecari
nhisusual
pose.Onceheseesmehecomesf orwardandenv el
opsmei nhisarms.Ii
nhal
ehismanly
scent.Hegroansagai
nstmyneck.

“
Sogoodt
oseey
ou,
”hesay
s.Ishi
veral
lov
er.
“Goodtoseeyout
oo.
”Helet
sgoandtakesmyhandashel
eadsmet
othepassengerdoor
.He
opensandall
owsmetogoinandt
hengoesar
oundtogeti
n.

Oncewear
eonourwayhet
akesal
ookatme.

“
SoIheary
ouwantt
obuyy
our
sel
facar
?”

“
Ido.
”

“WhatIfIbuyyouone?”hetentat
ivel
yasks.TobehonestI’mintwomi
nds.Il
i
kei
twhenaman
buysmet hi
ngsatthesamet i
meIdon’ twanthimtofeell
ikeheownsmebybuyi
ngmecer
tai
n
thi
ngs.Idon’
tgett
hatvibewithSazithough.Heisgener
allyagi
ver
.

“
Iwouldn'
tsayno,
”Isay
.Hei
ssur
pri
sedbyt
hat
.Isupposehewasexpect
ingsomesor
tof
r
esi
stance.

“
Good.I
t’
sal
readydone.Wecangoseei
tnowbef
orel
unchi
fyouwant
,”i
fIwant
.I’
m st
il
lshook.

“
Arey
ouser
ious?
”

“
Ngi
yakubhej
aphel
a,
”hesay
shol
dingasmi
l
e.

“
Ilov
eitmawungi
bhej
a,
”Isay
.

“
ThenI
’
lldoi
tmor
eof
ten.
”

“You’v
edoneenought houghSazi .Iappreci
ateit
.”Icanseehei sbecominguncomf or
table.He
remindsmeofwhenwewer eatthehomeandGogokeptgoi ngonandonabouthowt hankful
shewasf orhishelphedi dn’tknowwhatt odoorhowt orespond.Whenhegi v eshetrul
y
doesn’texpectanythi
nginr etur
n.Whi chisabreathoffr
eshair.Mostpeoplealwayshav ean
ult
eri
ormot iveforhel
ping.That ’
swhatI ’
veexperi
encedanyway .Icoul
dbewr ong.

Wedr
ivei
ntoaMer
cedesBenzcardeal
ershi
p.Themomentwewal
kinev
ery
onemakesaf
uss.
Themanageroft hedealershipper
sonal
l
ycomest ogreetus.Thesucki
ngupisonanotherl
evel
.
Wear eofferedrefreshmentswhichwepoli
tel
yref
use.Thenhel eadsustoamorepri
vate
secti
onanddi rectsustowar dsamaroonMercedesG- wagonthat’
sonaspinni
ngpl
atfor
m
whichdisplaysitfr
om everyangle.

Al
readymyheartbeati
saccel
erat
ing.Idon’
twanttogetmyhopesupyet
.Butt
hisi
sthecarof
mydreamsfornow.Iremembertell
i
ngSazithatwhenhetookmetoBudmar
sh.

“
Whatdoy
out
hink?
”heasksbr
ingi
ngmebackt
oreal
i
ty.

“
Aboutwhat
?”

“
Thi
s?”hemakesasweepi
nggest
ureatt
hecar
.

“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul,
”Iwhi
sper
.I’
m aboutt
olosemyshi
t.

“Here,
”hegi v
esmet hekeys.“It
’sy
our sLi
na.”Myey esar
easwideassaucers.Il
ookatt
hekey
asifit
’sgoingtocomeal i
ve.Hedanglesthem i
nf r
ontofmeandsnapmeoutofmyt r
ance.I
fl
ungmy selfint
ohim andhepicksmeupandspi nsmearound.Heevent
ual
lyplacesmeonmy
feet
.Ican’thelpthet
earsthatar
efreelyf
lowi
ng.

“
Whyt
het
ear
s?”hehasaconcer
nedl
ookonhi
sface.

“
It
’st
oomuch.You’
vedonesomuchf
orme.Il
ovethi
s,t
hanky
ou.
”I’
m notmaki
ngsenseIknow.
Hecupsmyf
acewhilewi
pingmyt
ear
swit
hhisthumbs.

“Il
ov edoingthingsf oryou.Itmakesmehappyt oseey ouhappy .Mh!”hisey esscanmyf ace.I
j
ustnod.Iwantt okisshim sobad.I nf actIwanttostri
pnakedandl ethimrav i
shmei nthe
middleofthisshowr oom.Mybeant witches.Heplantsasof tkissonmyl ipsandIl at
chonhi s
l
ipsandescal atet hekisstoanot herlevel.Icanf
eelhim pushingmeunt i
lIfeelasoli
dwal l
againstmyback.Myhandsar ealloverhisbackgropingandcl awing.Icanfeel ourbreat
hing
changes.Myst arts!Ifi
twer ejustthetwoofus.Thet houghtbr ingsbackmysensesandIpul l
away .Ourchestsar eheaving.Ilookar oundandtheshowr oom isempt yexceptforthetwoof
us.
“Youwantt
otakey
ourcarnow?
”hi
sdeepv
oicesendsweetsensat
ionspool
i
ngi
ntomyheat
ed
core.

“Idon’tt
hinkIcandri
ve.
”I’mli
ter
all
yshaking.Notsocert
ainwhichfeeli
ngismoreint
ense.He
kissesmeagai nandImoanagainsthisli
ps.Myneedi sal
mostpalpable.Hesi
lent
lyswears.
Callssomeoneandar r
angesforthem t
ocomef et
chthecar.I
’
m sti
llstandi
ngonshakylegs
againstthewallwi
thhim car
essi
ngmyonear m.HeissocloseIcanf eelhi
sbreat
hfanningmy
faceashespeaks.

“Let
sgo.”Hetakesmyhandi
nhisandleadsmeout
.Wef
ir
stgot
othemanagerandhegi
ves
himthedetai
l
softheper
sonfet
chi
ngthecar.

Onceinhi
scarhel
eansoverandki
ssesme.I’m drowni
ngi
nhi
ski
sses.Theyar
eint
oxi
cat
ing.I
feel
theur
getosi
tonhim andri
dehi
mf ordearl
ife.

“Wehav etogetoutofhere.Iwanttoburymy sel

fdeepinsi
deofyouLinamandla.”Icream my
panti
esal i
tt
le.Aswedr i
vetowardshishousehegetsacal l
andanswersitonBluetooth.Ther
e
i
ssomesor tofcri
sisathi
sheadof f
ice.Hehastoattendtoit
.TosayI
’m disappoint
edi san
underst
atement .

“
I’
m sor
ryLi
naIhav
etoat
tendt
othi
s.”Hesoundsasdi
sappoi
ntedasIf
eel
.

“I
t’
scool
.”I
tisnot
.I’
minheatandIneedt
her
elease.Het
akesaU-
tur
n.Af
terget
ti
ngmeat
ake
awayhedropsmeoffatwork.

Mostpeopl
earel
eavi
ngworkearl
yandI
’mthi
nki
ngofdoi
ngt
hesame.Ical
lMonde.Imi
ssher
andneedtofi
ndoutwhatt
imeshe’
ll
beback.

“
Baby
,”sheanswer
s.

“
Hey
,”Ial
mostwhi
sper
.“Whenar
eyoucomi
ngback?
”that
’sal
lIcant
hinkof
f.Ihearhersi
gh.
“
Ithast
obet
omor
rowbabe.Mymeet
ingwi
l
lrununt
ill
ate.
”

“
Imi
ssy
ou.I
tfeel
sli
key
ou’
vebeengonef
orev
er.
”I’
m al
mostwhi
ning.

“
Iknowbaby
.Atl
eastSazi
isback.Ar
eyouenj
oyi
ngy
ournewwheel
s?”

“
Youknew?
”

“
Ofcour
seIknew.Ihel
phi
m chooset
hecol
our
.”Ishoul
d’v
eknownwi
tht
hesesneakypeopl
e.

“Il
oveit
.Gosh.Mo,
”yesIj
oinedt
heMowagon.“
Inear
lyj
umpedhi
sbonesatt
hedeal
ershi
p.”
Shelaughs.

“
Welly
ouhav et
hewhol eev
eningtot
hankhi
m pr
operl
y.IwishIcoul
djoi
nyou.Imi
ssy
oubot
h.
I
tsl
onelyher
ewithoutmypeople.
”Mypeopl
e,myhear
tflut
tersabit
.

“
Hedi
dn’
tsayany
thi
ngaboutt
oni
ghthehadanemer
gencyatwor
khehast
oat
tendt
o.”

“
Oht
rustme,
he’
l
lcomeback.
”May
besheknowssomet
hingIdon’
t.

“
Ohwel
l
,I’
l
lsee.
”Idon’
twantt
orai
semyhopesf
ormet
ocr
ashl
i
ket
heydi
dthi
saf
ter
noon.

“
List
enbabeIhav
etogoourmeeti
ngisabouttoresume.Ineedt
ofi
ndy
ouatt
hehouse
t
omor r
owwhenIcomeback.
”Inodandreal
iseshecan’
tseeme.

“Okaybaby .”Shehangsup.Il ockupev er

ythi
ngandwhenI '
m doneIcal lanUber.IwishIhad
takenmycart hen.Idecidetogopasst heshopsfir
stespeciall
yClicks.Ineedashav ingcr
eam.
Whi l
ewal ki
ngt hroughtheisleIspott
hesectionwitht
hesanitarytowel s.Fuck!Myheartst
ops
beat i
ng.Icanfeel mybodybr eakingi
ntosweat.Idon’
tremembert hel asttimeIwasonmy
periods.Idumpev ery
thi
ngt her
eandgost rai
ghtforpr
egnancyt estsandgr ababunch.My
handsar eshaki ngasIpay .
Ifeell
iket
heUberdri
veri
staki
ngfor
ever.Event
ual
l
yIgeti
ntomyhouseandlockup.ThenI
quickl
yfol
lowt
heinstr
uct
ionsanddothetest.Mywhol
ebodyi
str
embling.

Posit
ive,
pregnant
.Itcan’
tbe.Mor
ningaf
ter
?Thi
scan’
tbehappeni
ng.Isi
tint
hatbat
hroom f
or
overanhourshakingli
kealeaf
.

Ican’
tbepregnant
.One,I
’m notreadyt ohaveanotherbaby
.Twot hear
rangementI’
minhasno
spaceforababy.Wehaven’
tev enfigureditoutyet
,whatwil
lthebabydo?Final
l
y,Monde.Iwi
l
l
notbetheonetobreakherheartIrefuse.Never.

Ipickupmyphonefrom thef
loorandcallSazi
.Itr
ingsunansweredunt
ilvoicemail.Ihangup,
remainthephonei
nmyhandandpr egnancytestsontheother.Whyam Itelli
nghim?Nobody
hastoknowaboutthisandnooneget shurt
.Myphoner ingsandIjumpofft hetoi
l
etseat .

“
Lina,
I’
mint
hemi
ddl
eofacr
isi
s.Ar
eyoual
ri
ght
?”y
ourdayi
saboutt
ogetf
ucked.

“
I’
m pr
egnant
,”If
lat
lyst
ate.Hei
ssi
l
entt
oapoi
ntIt
hinkhedi
dn’
thearme.

“I
’
m onmyway .
”Hehangsup.Ipi
ckuptheothertestsfrom t
hefloorandcleart
hebathr
oom.I
gopourmysel
faglassofwi
neandrel
axint
hel ounge.I’
mi ntur
moi l
insi
de.It
’snotl
ongbef
ore
Sazi
getsi
nthehouse.Het
akesonel
ookatmywi neglassandIcanseet heangerfl
ashacr
oss
hi
seyes.

“Howcanyoudri
nkwhenyouarepregnantLi
namandl
a?”hepr
acti
cal
lygrabst
heglassof
fmy
handsspi
l
li
ngsomeofit
scontent
.Hegoesandt hr
owsoutever
ythi
ngint
othesink.

“
I’
m notkeepi
ngi
t.
”

“
What
?”hewhi
sper
s.Di
sbel
i
efev
identonhi
sface.

“
I’
m notkeepi
ngi
t.
”
“
Ihear
dyout
hef
ir
stt
ime.WhatI
’
m st
ruggl
i
ngwi
thi
swi
tht
hecont
ent
.Why
?”

“Doy ouhav
etoaskSazi?”hebl
ankl
ylooksatme.“
Howdoy
out
hinkMondewi
l
lfeel
aboutme
pregnantwi
thyourbaby
?”helooksaway.

“
Let
snotmakeanyr
ashdeci
sions.I
’
llt
alkt
oherandwewi
l
lfi
gur
ethi
sout
,toget
her
.”

“Whatdoyouthi
nkshe'llsay
?She’
l
lsaysheisf
inewit
hitbecauseshewi
llbedoi
ngitf
ory
ou
anddeepdowny ouknowshewon'tbeokaywithit
.”Heburi
eshisheadi
nhishandsandt
hen
vi
gorousl
yrubshishead.Nowheispaci
ngtheroom.

“
Lina,
please.
”Ican’
tev
enl
ookathi
m.

“
Mymi
ndi
smadeupSazi
.Wi
l
lyoucomewi
thmeordoIgoonmyown?
”

“Don’
tmakemedot his.Wecangett
hrought
his.Mondewi
l
lbehur
tyesbutwhent
hebabyi
s
hereshe’
l
lbeehappy.
”

“
Youknowaswel lasIdothatshewi
l
lnev
erbeokaywi
tht
his.I
twi
l
lal
way
sbeaconst
ant
r
eminderofourbet
rayal
.
”

“Youjustfoundout
.Youar
enotthi
nkingstr
aight.Gi
vei
tadayt
oatleastthi
nkabouti
t.
”Igetup
andtakemyhandbag.Icallmygynaecol
ogistandmakeanappoi
ntment.Lucki
l
yhehasa
cancell
ati
ont hi
saf
ter
noonsothePA fit
smei n.

“Wi
ll
youcomewithmeorshouldIgetanUber?
”IaskwhenI
’m donewi
tht
hecal
l
.Hepi
cksup
hi
skeysandIf
oll
owhi
m.Idon’tevenknowifheisagr
eei
ngornot.

Heopensthedoorf
ormeandbangsi
tshutonceI
’
min.I
’
m choosi
ngnott
oent
ert
ainany
t
houghts.Mymindi
sint
ent
ional
l
ybl
ank.

“Whichdoctor
sareyougoi
ngto?”Igi
vehimthedir
ecti
ons.Theyarenott
oof arfrom me.Heis
sil
ental
ltheway.Oncewearether
ewedon’twaitl
ong.Thedoctordoesthet est
sandI’m not
faral
ongjust6weeks.I
tmustbetheresul
toft
hewhenwef i
rstgott
oget
her.Justgoest oshow
howfragi l
eandnewthisarrangementis.Healsoexplai
nstheprocedurewhichwil
lbesucti
on
abor
tion.Isignabunchofpaper sandam giveninstr
ucti
onsonhowt otakecar
eofmy sel
f
wheni t
’sdone.Thedoctordoest r
ytoincl
udeSaziinallt
heseinst
ructi
onsbuthest i
ll
doesn'
t
sayanyt hi
ng.Heexpl
ainsthattheprocedur
ewi l
lpr
obablytakeabout5t o10minutesbuthe
wouldliketokeepmef orobservati
onforanot
herhourafterwar
ds.Iagree.

I’
m prepar
edanddr uggedwi
thami l
dsedat
ivewhichhelpsmerel
ax.Duri
ngt
heprocedureI
can’
thelpt
het ear
sthatfr
eel
yfall
outofmyeyes.Icanfeelapi
nchhereandt
her
ebutf orthe
mostpartthesedati
veiswor
king.

“That’
sit
,it
’sov
er,
”thedoct
orpatsmyshoul
derashetakeshi
ssurgi
calgl
ovesof
f.Sazi
wal
ks
out.If
eelemptyanddrai
ned.Ir
efuset
othi
nkaboutwhatI’
vej
ustdone.

Chapt
er24

“
Justgonnast
andt
her
e

Andwat
chmebur
n

Butt
hat
'sal
ri
ght

BecauseIl
i
ke

Thewayi
thur
ts

Justgonnast
andt
her
e

Andhearmecr
y

Butt
hat
'sal
ri
ght

BecauseIl
ove

Thewayy
oul
i
e

Il
ovet
hewayy
oul
i
e

Ican'
ttel
lyouwhati
treal
l
yis

Icanonl
ytel
lyouwhati
tfeel
sli
ke

Andr
ightnowi
t'
sast
eel
kni
fe

I
nmywi
ndpi
pe

Ican'
tbr
eat
he”
-Emi
nem f
tRi
hanna
Ican’
twaitt
ogethome.Ifeltl
ikekill
i
ngMrRi char
dsforpr
olongingthemeet i
ng.Whocanblame
himthoughthemanhardl
yev ergetsallhi
smanagementteam andhi schil
drentoget
her
.I’
m
surehewantedtomil
kthi
sf orall
itsworth.Iwassti
l
lnoti
mpr essedthough.Imissedmy
peopl
e.Imisstheki
dseven.Hopef ul
lyaft
erwecatchupwecanst i
l
lvisi
tthem t
hisweekend.

Thethoughtofuscatchingupbringsasmil
etomyface.Iknowthosetwohavebeenati
tthe
wholenightbecauseIcouldn’
tgethol
dofei
theroft
hem.Idon’
tcarehowexhaustedt
heyare,
I
needatt
entiontoo.

Ipur
posel
ydidn’
tcal
lthem t
olett
hem knowIhav
ear
ri
ved.I
’
m hopi
ngt
ocat
cht
hem i
na
compromi
singposi
ti
on.

Thehousei st ooquietwhenIwal kin.Sazi probablygavet hestaffaweekendof f.Sneaky

bastard.Il
eav emypul lal
ongbagbyt hedoorandwal kin.Ifeelli
keI’m abouttoburstwit
h
exci
tement .JustasI’m abouttosprintupt hestairsInoti
cet hatt
hecur tai
nsandbl i
ndsare
drawni noneofourl iv
ingareasmaki ngi tver
ydar k.Ichangemydi r
ecti
onandgoi nther
e.When
myey esadj ustInoti
ceSazi l
yi
ngonhi sbackont hesofawi t
hahal ffi
nishedbottl
eofwhi skey
i
nhi shand.Iwal kfurt
herinunti
lI’
m st andingnextt ohim.Hehashi sot herarmfoldedacross
hiseyes.Ther earetwomor eempt ybot tl
esont hef l
oor.

Thisi
snotmySazi.Henev
erdri
nksthi
smuch,ever
.Whathappened?I
sitLona?Theki
ds?Hav
e
theyf
oundoutwherewearehi
dingt
hem?Ifeelmypani
cri
sing.

“Sazi
!”hedoesn’tr
espond.Isl
i
ghtl
yshakehi
m.Heremov
eshi
sar
mfr
om ov
erhi
sey
es.They
arebl
oodshotr ed.Somethi
ngcrawl
sundermyski
n.

“Whathappened?
”Icroak.Somet
hingdar
kfl
ashesacr
osshiseyes.Thi
sist
heSazi
thatwasf
ull
ofr
evengewhenwel ostourbaby
.Hegetsupandwalksaway.

“
Goaskyourgir
lfr
iend!
”Whatdoeshemean?I’
ml eftnumbandlooki
ngstupidst
andi
ngther
e
wat
chi
nghim di
sappear.I
’
mi natr
anceforawhil
e,tooscar
edtomov e.ThenIsnapoutofi
tand
f
oll
owhim upst
air
s.WhenIgettoourr
oom Iheartheshowerr
unning.

LikeI’mi ntwomi ndsaboutj oi

ninghim.Onepartiscuri
ousabouthi sstat
ementandt heot her
i
st erri
fi
edt of i
ndout.Iwalktentati
vel
ytowardstheshower.Ihearsil
entsobscomi ngthrough.I
quicklyrushandopent heshowerdoort ofi
ndhimf ul
lyclot
hedstil
l,
sit
ti
ngont hefloorwiththe
showerdr enchinghim.Hisheadi sburi
edinhishandandhiswhol ebodyshakingashesobs.
I’
veonl yev erseenhimlikethiswhenwel ostourbaby.Myheartbreaksint
otinypiecesatthe
sight.Irusht ohim andgoonmykneespul li
nghisri
gidbodyintomyar ms.Ican’tstopthetears
thatfalldownmyf ace.
“Whateveri
tis,wewill
sor
titout
.Tel
lmemyl ov
eandIwi
llf
ixit
.”Hiswhol
ebodyisshaki
ng.
Hissobsfeell
ikest
absofbrokengl
assgr
ati
nginsi
demyheart
.Irockhi
m backandfor
thaswe
cryandgett
ingsoaked.

“
Khumal
o.Whati
sitst
handwasam?Youar
escar
ingme.I
sitt
heki
ds?Lona?
”Hi
sbodyf
reezes.

“Sheki
ll
edmybaby,
rightinfr
ontofmeMonde.Shecal
ledmesot hatIcanwit
nessyetanot
her
deathofmybaby
.Why ?”Icoul
dbarel
ymakeoutwhatheissayi
ngbutIhearhim.Mybodyturns
i
cecoldandnotf
rom thecoldshower
.If
eelmyhear
tspli
nter
ingi
ntomi l
li
onshar
ds.

“Shedidwhat?”Iwhi
sper.Hepushesmebackandgetsonhisf
eet.Hei
smor ecomposed.He
walksoutoftheshowerleav
ingmeonmyknees.Iguesshenevermeantt
ot el
lme.If
oll
owhim
out.Thecl
othesfeel
veryheavyandst
ickynowt
hattheyar
ewet.Ifi
ndhi
mi nthebedr
oom
str
ippi
ng.

“Sazi
,youcan’
tjustdr
opabombl
i
ket
hatandwal
kaway
.Whatar
eyousay
ing?
”I’
m al
most
shouti
ng.

“Linamandlafoundoutshewaspr egnantandabor t
edthebaby.
”Somyearswer enotdeceivi
ng
meaf ewmi nutesago.If
eeldi
zzy.Likesomeonepunchedmei nmywombandpul leditout
.
FlashesofwhatIr ememberfrom thatdaycomef l
oodingmymind.Icanl
i
teral
l
yf eelthepai
nas
i
fi t'
shappening.Myhearti
sbreakingli
tt
lebyli
tt
le.Icanfeel
somethi
ngdyi
nginsideofme.

“
Youl
etherdoi
t?”Icanhar
dlyspeak.

“Whatt
hefuckwasIsupposet
odo?Ti
eherupandl
ockheraway
?Hermi
ndwasf
ucki
ngmade
up!
”heisr
aisi
nghi
sv oi
ce.

“
Youshoul
dhav
edonet
hat
.Youdi
dn’
tthi
nkt
otel
lme.Coul
dn’
tyouatl
eastt
ell
me.
”

“
Whatt
hefuckdoyouwantf
rom meMonde?Goasky
ourf
ucki
nggi
rl
fr
iend.DoIl
ookl
i
keIhav
e
awombtodeci
dewhet
herbabi
esli
veordi
e?”
“Don’
tshoutatme?Youmadeherpregnant.Youcould'
veatleastt
ri
edtostopit
.Whydidyou
l
etthepregnancyhappeni
nthef
ir
stplace?Ididn’
ttel
lyoutobeirr
esponsi
ble!
”Ican’
tbr
eathe
butI’
m shout
ing.

“Ungangirasel
iMonde.Youtoldmet ogogety oupussy,
Idid.Younevergavemeamanual to
foll
ow!Fuck!Youwantanswershambauy ekuLinamandla.Leavemethefuckal
one.”He
staggerst
ohi swal
kincloset
.Iquickl
ywalktomi neandchangemywetcl ot
hes.Thebedr
oom
i
sst i
llemptywhenIcomeoutandIdon’ tbotherl
ookingforhim.Heisnotmaki
ngsenseright
now.May beLonawillt
elladi
ffer
entstor
y.

Idri
veli
kealunatictoherhouse.Thest r
ugglewithhersecuri
tybecomesreal.Ical
landshe
doesn’
tpickup.Theyrefusetoletmei n.Idri
vetothenearestATM andwithdrawathousand
rand.WhenIgobackandshowt hem what’sathandtheysingadiff
erentt
une.Foraspli
t
secondIreal
isethispl
aceisnotassaf easwet hought.

I’
m parkedinfrontofherunit
.Myworryisifshewil
lopenforme.Iwalkuptoherdoorand
knock.Nothing.Itr
ythenobanditopens.Whyi sherdoornotl
ocked?Iwalkint
othequi
et
housesimilartohowIwal kedinmi
neear l
i
eron.Herhouseisnotdarkthough.Shei
ssit
ti
ngi
n
theloungestari
ngintospace.

“HowcouldyoudoitLona?”that
’sall
Icant hi
nkof.Shegetsstar
tledandturnsaroundtof
ace
me.Sheispaleasashrightnowandt herearebagsunderhereyes.Myhear tcl
enchespai
nful
l
y.
Ifeel
bet
rayed.Usel
ess.Worthl
ess.Couldn’
tIatleastbeconsi
deredinthatdeci
sion?

Att
hesameti
meIfeel
drai
ned.Looki
ngatherr
ightnowj
ustzapst
heener
gyoutofme.She
mustf
eelwor
se.

“
Het
oldy
ou,
”herv
oicesoundsv
erysmal
l
.

“
Ofcour
sehedi
d.Whydi
dyoudoi
tLona?
”

“
Idi
ditt
opr
otecty
ou?
”Thatf
eel
sli
keadaggert
hroughmyhear
t.

“Suchaself
isht
hingt
odoandy oublameme?Couldn'ty
ouatleastt
ell
meaboutbefor
e
decidi
ngonmybehalf
.Didn'
tIhav
easayi nt
hemat t
er?YouknowhowmuchIl ovey
ouand
carefory
ou.Howcany oudosomethingl
i
kethatandnotconsi
dermyf eel
i
ngs?
”
“
That
’sexact
lywhyIdi
dit.Topr
otecty
ouMonde,y
ourfeel
i
ngs.Ourt
ent
ati
veuni
on.Whatdo
y
outhinkt
hearri
val
oftheunpl
annedbabywoul
d’
vedonetous?”

“
Wewi
l
lnev
erknownowwoul
dwe!Yout
ookcar
eoft
hat
!”It
hrewather
.

“I
’m notsurewhathur
tst
hemost
.Thaty
oudi
ditory
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmebef
oredoi
ngi
t.
”She
comescl osetome.

“Idi
dn’tdoi
ttohurty
ou.It
houghtIwasspar
ingy
outhehurt.Ilov
eyouMondeandneverwant
tohurtyou.
”Shecupsmyfacelooki
ngdeepi
ntomyeyes.Sayingtheonet
hingI
’
vel
ongedfor
hertosay.I
tmightbetool
ate.

“That
’sthethi
ng,y
ouhur tme.Ithurt
stoknowt hatI
’
mr esponsibl
efory ourpai
noflosingt
his
baby.Iknowitwasn’teasyforyoubutyoudiditforme.Thathur t
s.Ithurtst
hatSazihastogo
overthepai
noflosingyetanotherbabybecauseofme. ”Iseeast hereali
tydawnsinhereyes
andtheyarefi
ll
edwi t
hpain.Asobwr etchesoutofherandshehol dshermout hwithbothher
shaki
nghandsast earsstream downherface.Ican’
thelpmyt earsfal
li
ng.

“
Whathav
eIdone?
”shewhi
sper
s.Yetanot
herbr
okenper
son.

“I
t’
snotyourf
aul
tmyl
ove,
”Isaypul
l
ingheri
nmyar
ms.Myangerhasdi
ssi
pat
ed.If
eel
real
l
y
drai
ned.

“
OhMonde.Pl
easef
orgi
veme.Il
ovey
ou.Ohmyst
ars!Sazi
!”shei
smumbl
i
ngagai
nstmyneck.

“Ilov
eyouLonaandhelovesyoutoo.Youhavetol
etthisgo.
”Ipullbackandplantasoftwet
kissonherl
ipsandt
henherfor
ehead.“Phy
sical
l
y,ar
ey ouokay?”shenods.“Ihavetogo.”She
nodsagain.

“
Ilov
eyou,
”shewhi
sper
s.

“
Ilov
eyout
oo.
”Wi
thonemor
elookatherIwal
kout
.InowknowwhatIhav
etodo.
Ifi
ndSazi passedout.I’
m sur
ehisbodycoul dn'tconsumeany morealcohol.Ipreparealight
meal andtakeashower .ThenIwaitforhimt osleepitoff.Iwatchhi
m ashesl eeps.Hel ooks
peaceful.Wil
lheeverbehappy ?Wil
lheev errecoverfrom thi
sloss?Suchasweetbeaut i
ful
gi
vingman.Hedeser v essomuchbet terthanwhathegot .Il
ienexttohim andwat chhimf or
whatf eel
sli
kehoursashesl eeps.I
’m notsurewhenIf al
lasleepbutwhenIopenmyey esagain
heislookingatme.Ibl i
nktwiceandstil
lmeethi scoldstarewhenIopent hem again.

“I
’m sorry,
”Iwhi
spertohi
m.Hebri
efl
ycloseshi
sey esasi
ftowardof
fmywor ds.“
Baby
.I’
m
sorr
y .Ishoul
dn’
thaveaskedf
ort
hiski
ndofarrangement.
”Hisey
essnapopen.

“
It
’snoty
ourf
aul
tMo.I
’
mtheonewhosl
eptwi
thherwi
thoutpr
otect
ion.I
thur
tsst
il
l.
”

“I’
m sor r
ybaby.Thi si
sallmyfault.
”Imovetowardshi m andpull hi
m closer.Hedoesn’tresi
st.I
wantt hecomf ort
.Iwanthimt omaket hathorr
ibl
ef eel
inggoaway .Ourli
pst entat
ivel
ytouch.A
softestofcaresses.Iwantt ofeelever
ytouch.Iwanttomemor izeitandi mprinti
tInmyhear t
andi nmymemor y .Iwanttosoakinhisscentandmar inatei
nit.“Ilovey oumor ethanlif
eitsel
f.
Ilovey ouKhumal o.”Hi
sey esdarkenaswehol dthestare.Iwantt ocrawl underhi
sskinand
remov eallt
hehur t.Iwanttocarrythepai
nalone.

“
Lonalov
esyou.I
tmi
ghtnotseem t
hatwaybutshedoes.Theonl
yper
sont
obl
amei
nal
lof
t
hisi
sme.Yout
wocansti
l
lmakethiswork.
”

“Ijustwanty ouMo, ”hef i

nall
yspeaks.Hi sv oi
ceisraspyIcanbar elyrecogniseit.Imov eeven
closerandsmashmyl i
psintohis.Iwantt okisshishurtaway .Imakemyi ntenti
oncl earasI
i
nt ensifytheki ss.Hecat chesonv eryquick.Ther ei
sneedanddesper at
ioninthiskiss.Wecl aw
andgr opeateachot herasourcl ot
hesf l
ypi ecebypieceunti
l wearebot hcompl etel
ynaked.He
holdsmet i
ghterthanusual .It
’spuni
shingandI thur
tsbutItakeit.Ireturnthefav ourasIclaw
athi sbackenought odr awbl ood.Hehasmepi nnedunderhimi nasecondasheswi ftl
yenters
me.Myhandscl awupanddownhi sbackandhehashi shandsgr opingmyass.Hesqueezes
painf ull
yashepoundsi ntome.I t’
spleasur emixedwi t
hpain.Idon’tmi nd,Imeethi sthrust
s
half way.Hiskissispuni shing.Icanevent astesomebl ood.I
’m notsur eifit
'shisormi ne.Idon’t
car e.IfIcouldlit
erall
yabsor bhispainIwoul d.Thisgoesonf orawhi le.Wear ebot hteeteri
ng
ont hevergeofcl i
maxbutnotwant i
ngto.Hepul l
sawayf r
om mybr uisedli
psandhol dsmy
headi nbothhands.Myhai risbeingpulledbackwar ds.

“
Idon’
tknowwhattodoMo,”hesayswhil
eheisburi
eddeepinsi
deofme.Hisey essocl
oseto
me,di
splayamyr
iadofemoti
ons.Ihol
dontohisbackpul
li
nghim cl
oseri
fthat
’sevenpossi
ble.
“Iknow,
”Iwhi
sperastear
sf l
owuncheckedatt
hecor
nerofmyey
es.Al
onet
earescapesf
rom
hiseyeandhebur
ieshisheadatt
hesideofmyneck.

“FuckMo!”hehal
fscreamsandhal
fgr
oansashespi
l
lshi
mselfdeepwi t
hinme.Wehol
dont
o
eachforasweletgo.Aft
erawhi
lewecuddl
eandwefal
lbacki
ntosleep.

Chapt
er25

“
Andnev
erf
orgetabout

Whaty
ousai
dweshoul
dset
tl
edown

AndIt
houghtwe'
dgetar
oundt
oit

ButIj
ustgotar
ound

I
t'
sti
meIdor
ight

'
Causey
oushoul
d'
vel
eft

Doi
tforme

I
fyouwon'
tdoi
tyour
sel
f

Youputmef
ir
st

WhenIputy
out
hroughi
t

Yeah,
Iputy
out
hroughi
t

WhenIshoul
d'
veknewi
twasbestt
haty
ou

RunawayI
'
m nogoodf
ory
ou

Runandf
indsomebodybet
ter

Someonewhoi
sreadyf
ory
ou

Whi
l
eIgetmyl
i
fet
oget
her
”-Dv
sn

Worstweekendofmyl if
e.Ever.Iwasal
way st
oldbymyparent
sthatIwasimpulsi
veanda
peopl
epleaserbutthi
stakesthecake.Icoul
dn’
tevengoseemykids.Ij
usthav
enoener gyl
eft
andIdon’
twantt hem t
oseemet hi
smessedup.
DoIregretmydecisi
on?Yesandno.Conf usingIknow.I’
m notr
eadyt obeamot her.Ist
il
l
bel
ievethi
swouldhavehurtMondet hanpleasedher.I
nhindsi
ghtthoughithurtSazi
.Deeply
andthatwasnevermyintent
ion.Ishoul
dn’thaveinvol
vedhim.ThatisthepartI’
m str
uggl
ing
wit
h.HowdoIhur tsomeoneaski ndashim?

I
t’
saMondayandIdragmybodytowork.Myphonehasbeenof
fthewholeweekend.Iwasn’
t
i
nthemoodtospeaktoany
one.I
twasevenasurpr
iset
oseeSazi’
sdr
iverthedaybef
ore
del
i
ver
ingmycar.

Iarr
iveatwor
kat9am onthedot
.Idi
dsayi
twasawal
ki
ngzombi
e.If
indev
ery
oneal
most
ther
e.EvenFi
siwei
sherebef
oreme.

“
Goodmor
ning,
”Isay
.

“
Whoa!Whathappenedt
oyou?Roughweekend?
”shescr
eams.I
’
m noti
nthemood.

“
Somet
hingl
i
ket
hat
,”Imumbl
e.

“
Damngal
.Musthav
ebeenl
i
t.Youshoul
dinv
itemesomet
ime.
”

“
Jamay
beIwi
l
l.I
sthebossi
n?”

“Notyet.That’
saf i
rst.Maybeshehadalitweekendtoo,
”shechuckles.Ii
gnoreherandwal kto
Monde’sof f
ice.Icanstil
lsmell
thefai
ntscentofherper
fume.Iwonderwhyshei sn’tinyet.Igo
andplacesomeur gentfi
lesonherdeskandjustmakesurethattheoffi
ceisinorder.Iseethe
dustbi
ni sn’
tclear
edandt her
earesomepaper sonthefl
oor.Ibendtopickthem up

“
Welli
sn’
tthi
sani
cewel
comingvi
ew.”Abar
it
onev
oicecomesf
rom behi
nd.Isnapmyheadup
i
nshockandbumpmyheadonthedesk.

“
Fuck!
”itbl
oodyhur
tsandIf
eel
tear
spr
ickl
emyey
e.
“Ohshi
t!Areyouokay?Idi
dn’tmeant
ost
art
ley
ou.
”If
eel
hishandonmyar
mtr
yingt
ohel
pme
outf
rom underneat
hthedesk.

Andt
henIdot
heunt
hinkabl
e,Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Iwantt
olett
hepai
nout
.

“Fucki
ngshit
!”hemut t
ers.Ibowll
i
keababy
.Heev
ent
ual
l
ypul
l
smei
ntohi
schest
.Thehugi
s
awkward.Idon’tcar
e.Ileti
tall
out.

“
Ther
enow.Youar
eokay
.Not
hingi
sbr
oken.
”Hepat
smybackawkwar
d.Ii
ncr
easet
hev
olume.

“Shi
t!Nowondert
heotherl
adyr
an!
”hemumbl
esbutIst
il
lhearhi
m.Thatsnapsmet
omy
senses.Il
ookupt
ohim.Fuckme!

“Whatdoyoumeanshel
eft
?”Ihav
emyt
ear
sandsnor
tal
lov
erhi
ssui
tjacket
.Hemakesa
disgust
edf
ace.

“Her
e,”hesaysgi
vingmeahandkerchi
eff
rom t
hef
rontpocketofhi
sjacket
.“Nev
ert
houghtt
his
coul
dcomei nhandy,
”hechuckl
es.

It
aket
hehandker
chi
efandbl
owmynose.Har
d.Hi
sey
esar
ebul
ging.

“
Whatdoy
oumeanshel
eft
?”Ir
epeat
.

“Justthat,shelef
t.Iwascalledher
etocomeandtakeoverunt
ilt
heyfindsomeone.
”Het
akes
offhisjacketandwal ksawaytohangitont
hecoathanger
.Ohshit.Thiscoul
dbemynewboss
andIhav emysnor tall
overhim!

“I
’
m Khumbubyt heway,
”heisbackgivi
ngmeagl assofwater.ThenItakeaproperlookathi
m.
Heisnotbadlooki
ng.SKKhozalookal
i
ke.Iwonderift
heyhi
repeopl ef
ortheirl
ooksinthi
s
pl
ace.Darkt
alkandhandsometype.Hehassli
ghtl
ybigear
st hough.Hi
sey eswidens.“Ar
eyou
l
aughingatmyears?”
“
No!
”thatcomesoutt
ooqui
ck.Her
aiseshi
sey
ebr
ow.

“YhoHay i
sisi.Don’
tcomeforme.Uzibonil
eubaunj ani?Anyoneevertol
dy ounott
ocryi
n
publi
c?”hemakesasounddemonst r
ati
nghi sdisgust.Ir
untothebathroom.WhenItakealook
i
nt hemirr
ornot hi
ngisashi
deousashemadei touttobe.ImeanIhav epuff
yeyesandared
nosebutI’m okay.Iwal
kbacktotheoffi
cetofindhimi nsti
tches.

I
’
m goi
ngt
obewor
kingwi
thani
diot
.Hei
sli
ter
all
ybendov
erl
aughi
ng.

“Ohthelookonyourface,
pri
cel
ess,
”Heconti
nuest
olaugh.Istandthereandwatchuntilheis
cal
mt heoffi
cedooropenswhil
eheisbusycr
acki
ngup.Thelaughterdiesinhi
sface.Sazi.My
hear
tstopsbeati
ngandIlookathi
m.Boyhelookshot
.Hedi dn’tshaveandhishai
rislonger
buthelooksdamnfine.

“
Goodmor ni
ng.Idi
dn’
tmeantodist
urby ou.Icametodropt
hisoff
.”Hemov
eshisi
ntensel
ook
f
rom Khumbutome.Hiseyescoul
dfreezetheAntar
cti
ca.Hegiv
esmeanenvel
ope.

“Youarenotdi
stur
bingMrKhumalo.I
’m Khumbulani,
it’
sapleasur
etomeety
oui
nper
son.
”He
giveshi
m hi
shandandSazijustl
ooksatitunt
ilhepul
lsitback.

Het
urnsar
oundandl
eav
es.Wear
ebot
hst
ari
ngathi
sret
reat
ingback.OkayIknowIam.

“Hol
yFuck!Themanisevenmorecommandi
ngi
nper
son.Howt
hehel
ldoy
ouknowSazi
Khumal
o?”clear
lyKhumbuisaf
an.

“
Mut
ual
fri
ends.
”

“
Hewant
syou,
”hesay
s.Whoi
sthi
sper
son?

“
What
?How di
dyoucomet
othatconcl
usi
on?
”

“
I’
m aguy
.Iknowt
heset
hings,
”heshr
ugs.
“
I’
m Lona,
I’
mtheP.
A.,
”Ir
esumet
hei
ntr
oduct
ion.

“Cool,
I'
m goi
ngt olovewor ki
ngwi t
hyou.”I’
m notsurebutIgivehi
m asmi le.Ishowhi
m wher
e
everyt
hingi
sbutthel et
terisbori
ngahol einmypocket .Iknowitwil
lexpl
ainwhyIhaveanew
boss.Onceheisset t
ledinIgobackt omydesk.Fi si
wei sbusywithavisi
torandIdeci
detogo
siti
nmycarandr eadthelett
er.Ican’
twaitanylonger.Itakemyphonewithandgot othe
parki
ng.OnceinsidethecarIopent helet
terwit
hshakyhands.

-Baby.I
’
m sorr
yIhav etodot his.It
’scowardlyIknow.Imighthavedeceiv
edy ouwhenIsai dI
wasokaywithjustbeingcasual.Ifell
inlovewithyou.I’
m headovertheheel
sinlove.That’
s
whyIhadhopedt hatallofuscoul dbeont hesamewav el
ength.Forme,l
ovingyouandSazi at
thesameti
mei sthemostnat uralthi
ng.Itpl
easedmei mmensel ytoseeyoutogether
.Itwould
havemademeev enmor ehappi eri
fyouhadbeent heonetogivehimtheonet hi
ngIcouldn’t
.

That
’swhenIbecomeahy pocr
it
ebecausebei
ngababycar
ri
eri
snotwhatweofferedyou.I
t
wasn’tonthet
abl
e.Butt
hisisl
if
ewecan’tal
waysf
oll
owsomesetofrul
es.Li
fehappensand
i
t’
sfluid.

I
tpainsmet hatyouhadt obeplacedint
hepositionwherey ougotpregnantwheny ouwer
enot
ready
.Isupposeweal lhavetotakether
esponsibil
it
yforthat.I
tgutt
edmet hatyouhadt
o
termi
nate.Iknowitwasn’teasyfory
ou.Don’tf
eel bad.I
twasn'tyourresponsibi
l
ityt
ocar
rythe
Khumaloheirs.Notunl
esswehadaskedy ou.

I
twasshockthaty outookt
hedeci
sionwit
houtt
alki
ngtome.NotasSazi
’sper
sonbutasyour
l
overandyourfr
iend.Youseei
nmyhear ty
ouwerealreadyel
evat
edt
othatl
evel
.Agai
nIcan’t
hol
dthatagai
nstyou.

Sazii
sabigboy
.Hecould'
vepr
eventedall
thi
sbuthedi
dn'
t.I
t’
sjustt
hatt
hisf
orhi
m has
openedupol
dwoundsthatwethoughthadheal
ed.

Ibelievewecouldbegoodt
oget
her.Al
lthr
eeofus.Ijustwantyoubot
htomakesurethati
t’
s
somet hi
ngyouwant.Asmuchasyouguyssayy ouwantit
,Ineedyoutodoi
tfort
heri
ght
reasons.Thatweall
lov
eeachot
herandnotjusttopl
easemeorgi vemewhatIwant
.

Doy oul
oveSazi,doeshelov
eyou?Doyouneedmei nthepi
ctur
eorjustt
hetwoofyou?Bot
h
ofyouneedtofiguret
hisout
.Ican’
tmaket
hatdeci
sionfory
ou.HenceI’
mr emov
ingmysel
f
fr
om theequat
ion.

I
fIcan'
thav
ebothofy
ou,
thenI
’
drat
herl
osei
tal
landt
hati
smyt
rut
h.Youhav
etodeci
dewhat
y
ouwantLona.
I
fy oudochoosetogoyourownwayt
hati
sal
sookay.Il
oveyouandIlov
eKhothatsoand
Nthanti
si.Thanky
ouf
orall
owingmet
obepar
tofthei
rli
veseveni
fforali
tt
lewhi
le.

I
’
llbei
nTanzani
aforawhil
e.I
’mfinal
l
ytaki
ngovermyf
ather
’sbusi
nesst
hissi
de.Keepsaf
e,
r
ememberTsiet
siandhi
sNiger
iansarest
il
lont
hehunt
.I’
m goi
ngtomissyousomuchmyl ov
e.

Takecar
eofy
our
sel
f.

Il
ovey
oual
way
s.-

OhMyheart.Shecan’
tbegone.If
eelempty
.Lostandconf
used.Justl
i
ket hat,
overal
ett
er?
Justt
hensomeoneknocksonmywi ndow.Yougottobeki
ddingme.Isli
ghtlyopenmywindow.

“
Isr
andom cr
yingy
ourhobbyorsomet
hing?
”Khumbusay
s.Ij
ustr
oll
myey
esathi
m.

“OkayI
’l
ll
eavey
out
oitt
hen.Goeatsomet
hing.
”Hewal
ksawayandget
sinaspor
tscar
.Sol
i
ke
him.Fl
ashy.

Isiti
nt hecarunt
ilI
’
mfull
yrecov
eredthenIgobacki
ntotheof
fi
ce.Ifi
ndFisi
weheadov
erheels
i
nl ovewithKhumbu.Shecan’
tstoptal
ki
ngabouthi
mt hewhol
eafter
noon.Idon’
tev
enhearhal
f
thethingsshesays.

It
’sbeenaweeksi
nceMondelef
t.Ihaven’
tspokennorseenSazisincehebroughtmet helet
ter
.
Ifeell
i
keI’
m mi
ssi
ngpar
tsofmybei ng.Imisst
hem both.I
’m soscaredtofaceSazi
.Idon’t
knowwhattosayt
ohim.OkayIdoknow.Iwantt oapol
ogisebutIdon’thav
et hegut
stof ace
him.

TodayIwenthomeearl
y,Khumbulanit
houghtIneededt
het
imeoff
.Heget
sonmynerves
shame.What’
sworsehethinksheisal
lthat
.Heknowshisj
obandhei
snotmeanoranyt
hing
butheisj
ustext
ra.

Iwantt
ocal
lSazi
andf
indouti
fIcanv
isi
ttheki
ds.I
nfactIwantmyki
dsback.SoIcal
lhi
m.

“
Lina,
”hi
svoi
cesoundsf
ami
l
iarandy
etsof
orei
gn.

“
HiSazi
.IhopeI
’
m notdi
stur
bing.
”Thi
sisawkwar
d.
“
Noy
ouar
enot
.”Si
l
ence.

“
Iwantt
ofet
cht
heki
ds.
”

“
Whywoul
dyoudot
hatorhav
eyouf
oundTsi
etsi
?”

“
No.Ij
ustt
hought
..
.”

“
Youj
ustt
houghtwhat
?ThatIwoul
djustst
opcar
ingf
ort
hei
rwel
far
eandsaf
ety
?”

“
No.I
t’
sjust
,It
hought
..
.”

“Dousbot
haf av
ourandstopthinki
ng.I
’
llsendacarf
ory
oul
ater
.Youar
evi
sit
ingt
hem.Iwi
l
l
notl
ety
ouplacethoseki
dsindanger.
”

“
Iwasn'
t.
..
”Hehangsup.I
nfur
iat
ingman.Li
kehei
sthemostannoy
ingper
sonev
er.

Twohour
slat
ert
her
eisaknockonmydoor
.It
’sBheki
.

“
Sdudl
a,y
iniy
ouwer
enotexpect
ingme?
”

“
NoIt
houghtSazi
sai
dhewassendi
ngadr
iver
.”

“
Wel
lIdodr
ive.Ar
eyour
eady
?”Inodmyheadandl
ethi
min.

“Letmegetmybag, ”Iwal
kt omyroom t
ogetmyov er
nightbag.Ifi
ndBhekiint
hekitchenwi
th
anappleinhishand.Hert
akesmybagandf ol
l
owsmeout .Wedr i
veinsi
lenceunt
ilwegetto
theair
str
ip.Weboardthejetandi
t’
sonlythetwoofuswiththecrew.

“
Wher
eisSane?
”Iaskt
obr
eakt
hesi
l
ence.
“
Lef
therhome.Shewasn’
tfeel
i
ngwel
l
.Thepr
egnancyi
smessi
ngherup.
”If
eel
badt
hathehas
t
obabysi
tme.

“
Oh.Ihopesheget
sbet
ter
.”

“
Shewi
l
l?Whatdi
dthati
diotsot
oyou?
”

“
Who?
”Ipl
aydumb.

“
Saziwhoelse?Hei
shomebyhi
msel
fsul
ki
ng.Mondehasbeenawayonbusi
nesst
hewhol
e
week.What
’sgoi
ngon?
”

“Youshouldaskhi
m.”Iav
oidl
ooki
ngathi
m.I
’
m notsur
ehowmuchheknowsaboutSazi
’
s
personal
li
fe.

“
Janeh.Nawengaphay
oudon'
tl
ooksogood.
”Heshakeshi
sheadandgoest
hroughhi
sphone.

Wearr
iveatthefar
m andarewelcomedbylov
elythesoundsofl
aught
erandscr
eamingf
rom
t
hechi
ldren.Aft
eral
lthegr
eet
ingstoAuntyandtheotherst
affmembersIt
aketheki
dst
othei
r
r
oom.Ijustneedsomealonet
imewi t
hthem.

Theyhav
etwof
luf
fybeaut
if
ulst
uff
edponi
es.Youcansi
nki
ntot
hem asy
oucuddl
e.

“
Wher
edi
dyouguy
sgett
hese?
”Iaskpoi
nti
ngatt
hem.

“
Aunt
yMondebr
oughtt
hem f
orus,
”Khot
hat
soanswer
s.

“
Real
l
y?When?
”
“Sunday
.Theweekendy oudi
dn’tcome.Shecameal
onet
osaygoodby
e.Shesay
sshewas
goingawayf
orawhile.Butwi
llbeback.”

“Imisshermommy .Canwegost aywit

hher?Shebuysalotoftoys,
”Nthant
isiadds.Iignore
herrequestandasktoseet hei
rtoys.Mondeaddedontopofthet oy
swehadbr oughttheother
week.Isitwit
hthem throughdi
nnerandspendthenighti
ntheirbed.If
eelali
tt
lebet t
erbeing
aroundthem.Theyhav ecalmedmedownabi t
.

TheweekendisoverbeforeI
’m evenready.Iwai
tfort
hem togotosleepbeforel
eav
ing.When
wegettoJohannesburgBhekidropsmeof fathome.Inoti
cethatt
hesecurit
yhasbeen
changedatthegat
e.Ithasn’
tbeenlongsincetheyweredepl
oyedhere.Iwonderwhythe
suddenchange.

Ihat
eitwhenI ’
m al
onebecauset
henIhavetol
ist
ent
omyt hought
s.Theyaregoingtodr
iveme
i
nsaneifIenter
tai
nthem.SoIdeci
detogotosl
eep.I
t’
saMondayt hefol
l
owingdayandIneed
mymi ndreadyandfreshf
orKhumbu.If
eelsomuchbett
ernowthatIhavespentti
mewiththe
ki
ds.

I
'm atworkandt hedayisunusual
lybusy
.I’
m notsurewhybutKhumbuhasbacktoback
meetingsthatherequi
resmet oatt
end.Unli
keMondewhodi dn’tr
equi
remeall
thet
imethi
s
oneneedsmef orever
ysmallthi
ng.ThethoughtofMondebringsunwarr
ant
edmemori
esof
bot
hoft hem.

Howar etheydoing?Aretheyal
sothi
nkingofmeasIoft
enthi
nkofthem.BeforeIknowtheday
i
sov erandjustasI’
m abouttol
eaveIrecei
veacal
lfr
om myexsi
sterin-
law.Tsi
etsi
’smuti
l
ated
bodywasdel i
veredatthei
rdoor
step.

Myheartdr
ops.Wemayhavehadourdi
ffer
encesandyeshewasanasshol
ebuthewasst
il
la
f
atherofmyki
dsandIdi
dn’
twishhi
m dead.OkayImayhaveonthef
ewoccasi
ons.

Whatam Igoingtotel
ltheki
ds?Theyhar
dlyspeakabouthi
m andthatisalsoworr
ying.Ican
hearhi
ssisteri
sreal
lydoi
ngthi
soutofdutymorethananythi
ng.I
fitwasupt ohershewouldn’
t
tel
lme.Beforehangi
ngupshealsotel
lsmethattheburi
alwil
lbethefol
lowingSat
urday.

Idon’
thav
etear
sforhi
m.I
’
mtr
yingt
ogetdeepwi
thi
nmyf
eel
i
ngsmay
beI
’
llbet
ouched
di
ff
erent
lybutnot
hing.Dryasadeser
t.Igohometomylonelyhouseandsi
tinf
rontoft
heTV
wi
thabottl
eofwineunt i
li
tdoesi
t’
sjobandI’
m abl
etof
allasleep.

I
’
m wokeni
nthemi
ddl
eoft
heni
ghtbyar
ingi
ngphone.Idon’
tev
encheckwhoi
tis.

“
Hel
l
o,”Isayi
nmygr
oggyv
oice.

“Li
na,
”hesoundsv
eryal
ertandawake.Myhear
tski
psabeat
.Ihav
en’
thear
dfr
om hi
min
almostt
woweeks.

“
Yes,
”Iwhi
sperf
eel
i
ngt
ear
sst
ingmyey
es.

“
Ihear
daboutTsi
etsi
,ar
eyouokay
?”t
het
ear
sfi
nal
l
yfal
l
.

“
Yes.I
’
mfi
ne.
”

“
Youdon’
tsoundf
ine.
”

“
It
’sj
ust
,Idi
dn’
twi
shhi
m deadorany
thi
ng.Hewasahugepar
tofmey
ouknow.
”

“
Iknow.Hav
eyout
oldt
heki
ds?
”

“
No.I
t’
snotsomet
hingIcant
ell
them ov
ert
hephone.
”

“
Iknow.I
’
llcomepi
cky
ouupi
nthemor
ningsowecangof
etcht
hem t
omor
row.
”

“Okay.
”Hehangsup.Thathur
tst
oosoIcont
inuet
ocr
y.ForTsi
etsi
,Sazi
,Mondeandmybaby
.
Thelossi
sunbear
able.