How We Raise Our Daughters and Sons:

Child -Rearing and Gender Socialization in the

Philippines
Ma. Emma Concepcion Liwag, Alma de la Cruz and Ma. Elizabeth
Macapagal
United Nations Children’s Fund and Ateneo Wellness Center,
1999.

Introduction

All the psychological concepts of how gender roles are formed and
learned by children stress the central role of the family. The family is the
child’s fundamental socializing group and natural environment for
growing into maleness and femaleness. Various questions have been
raised in terms of family beliefs which influence gender determination,
discriminatory practices for or against the girl child and over-all gender
role expectations.

A comprehensive literature review on child-rearing in the Philippines was

conducted to address the above concerns. Specifically, the review
focused on the following research objectives:

• Describe Filipino child-rearing attitudes, beliefs, expectations

and practices from
early childhood to early adulthood (0-18) which demonstrate
explicit and implicit differential socialization for boys and girls;

• Analyze the influence, impact and consequences of these child-

rearing practices
on the development and learning of gender roles and stereotypes
among Filipino children (for both boys and girls);

• Assess critically these child-rearing practices in terms of their

contributions to
the disadvantages and discriminations experienced by the Filipina
girl-child.

The study further provides an analytical framework to critically assess

the situation of the Filipina girl-child of today based on cultural beliefs
and gendering by home environments. It presents strategies for social
reflection and advocacy in light of discriminatory practices against the
Filipino girl-child.
Methodology

To achieve the research objectives, a library research of published and

unpublished works covering the period from 1970 to 1997 was
conducted. A concerted effort was made from April to June 1997 to
survey the literature published nationwide. To avoid an exclusively
urban or Metro Manila bias, special attention was given to regional
studies.

The sampling included books in psychology, sociology, anthropology,

gender and/or women’s studies, family studies, communication,
education and social work. Literature reviews, scholarly journals and
annotated bibliographies also formed part of the review.

The literature search was guided by key words such as: child-rearing
practices; beliefs; attitudes; methods; gendered home environments;
gender role socialization; and the like. A total of 131 studies were found
to be relevant to the research. An abstract for each study was prepared
complete with bibliographic information, research objectives, data-
gathering process methods, significant findings/results and conclusions.
These were then analyzed on the bases of common results and themes.

A Conceptual Framework Derived from the Literature

The Socialization of Gender

Socialization is the complex process of learning those behaviors that are

Process
considered appropriate within a given culture. Gender socialization is
Information
one of its most pervasive manifestations.

The conceptual model of gender socialization (Figure 1) shows society’s

Conditioning/mode
gender prescriptions as reflected in and by the family.
Schema
Schema ling
Society’s Creation of
Figure 1. A conceptual model of gender socialization derived from the
gender gender differences in
empirical literature
expectations home environment of
Traits and children by parents as Gender differences
behaviors affected by: in child rearing
Parental gender during the childhood
preference in specific and adolescent
domains (e.g., work, stages
leisure)
Parental gender role
expectations
Reinforceme Gender
nt differences in
children’s:
Beliefs/attitudes
Gender identity
behavior
The model is used to structure the discussion of the findings of the
review: specific expectations of masculine and feminine behaviors in the
Philippine society; the family‘s influences in terms of gender
preferences, parents’ expectations, gender differences in child-rearing,
resource allocation of families between genders; and inferred outcomes
of gender socialization girls and boys experienced in their families as
reinforced by schools and the media. The latter recreates a behavioral,
attitudinal and emotional profile of the Filipino girl-child as drawn from
the literature.

The Research Findings

The Girl -Child and the Filipina Woman She Is

Expected to Be

There are clear-cut gender role expectations in Philippine society. The

literature points to two main ideas: patriarchy brings about separate
sexual standards (femininity is associated with being mahinhin
(modest), pino ang kilos (refined) and mabini (demure), while being
malakas (strong), matipuno (brawny) and malusog (healthy) are
associated with masculinity); and second, the family is the primary
socialization agent that perpetuates the disparity.

Filipino mothers and fathers hold themselves up rigidly to societal

prescriptions of what is proper maternal (“feminine”) and paternal
(“masculine”) roles and behaviors. Consequently, the children they raise
internalize and perpetuate these self-same expectations.
With the bias that women are essentially perceived as wives, mothers
and homemakers (Baylon, 1975; Asprer, 1980; Gonzalez, 1977; Makil,
1981; Sobritchea, 1990), the Filipino girl-child is expected to learn to
manage a household and fulfill domestic obligations and responsibilities
in the future.

The Girl-Child and How She is Raised in the

Filipino Family

Filipino children are socialized to their gender identities in a variety of

ways. The studies under review dealt with the subject extensively, but
six (6) topics became very prominent:

1. Parental Preferences for Daughters and Sons

Several studies have shown that Filipino families prefer sons over
daughters (Bulatao, 1975; Jurilla, 1986), especially for the first born
(Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Estrada, 1983). This is expressed strongly
by fathers (Mendez & Jocano, 1979a; Estrada, 1983).

On the other hand, female children are highly desired by parents,

especially mothers (Licuanan, 1979; Estrada, 1983). They are preferred
“so that they can help in housework and family chores” (Bulatao, 1975,
1978), and assist the mother in fulfilling the work of nurturance. She is
viewed as an ever-dependable source of support (Castillo, 1993) or
tagasalo (rescuer) (Carandang, 1987).

2. Gender-Related Expectations that Parents have for their

Children

By and large, studies suggest no salient sex differences in parents’

character expectations for children. Sobritchea (1990) found that
parents expected their children, both girls and boys, to develop traits of
industry, respect, perseverance in studies and kindness. Licuanan
(1979) reported that parents wanted their children to have a college
education—a goal set for both male and female children. However,
Minoza, Tablante and Botor (1984) observed that mothers had higher
aspirations for their male preschool children than for females.
 3. Gender-differentiated Child-rearing Beliefs and
Practices

Parental and Infancy Stages

During the prenatal and infancy stages, the expectant mother’s looks
are associated with the gender of the unborn child. The unborn girl-child
is associated with the mother’s looks –pretty and not so heavy
(Sobritchea, 1990 ); the unborn boy-child is believed to be strong, to eat
more and to grow faster.

Childhood

It has been reported that boys and girls are treated are alike until 5 or 6
years of age (Guthrie and Jacobs, 1966) and that gender socialization
begins at about age 10 (Stoodley, 1957).

Gender segregation. Gender segregation begins when children reach

school age. Prior to this brothers and sisters are allowed to sleep, bathe
and swim together (Jocano, 1970; Mendez and Jocano, 1979a). Rigid
separation of the sexes is enforced in Maranao families when the
children reach 6 years of age.

Play. It is during play time that sex differentiation is observed among

Filipino children. Bahay-bahayan (playing house; Estrada, 1983), and
lutu-lutuan (cooking, Jocano, 1988) are some games where girls enact
mother –and -- baby scenarios and performing home-related activities
(Jocano, 1988). Sobritchea (1990) reported that girls are still cautioned
against playing boy’s games like larong bola (ball games) and paggala-
gala (wandering about). Lim-Yuzon (1982) observed pre-school girls
favoring quiet games (e.g. writing work, puzzles and on- looker
activities) while their male counterparts portrayed superheroes from
television. Gender-neutral play activities like luksong tinik, patintero and
taguan were noted as well (Mendez and Jocano, 1979a). When parents
joined in, children reported that mothers played more “word games”
while fathers preferred “strategy games” like chess and
checkers(Bernardo, 1994).

Freedom versus Restrictions. There is a clear difference in the amount of

freedom granted to boys and the degree of restrictions that girls have to
cope with (Quiambao, 1965; Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Razon, 1981)
when it comes to child-rearing. Girls are kept closer to hearth and home
for obvious gender-strereotypical reasons: a girls’ place is the home (De
La Cruz et.al., 1971), she is needed to manage the household (Mendez
and Jocano, 1979a), needs protection. Porio (1994) questions why the
same should not apply to boys when male streetchildren are just as
vulnerable to brutality from the police, pimps, pedophiles, drug- pushers
and even bystanders.

Aggression. Parents are reportedly more permissive towards male

children when it comes to handling aggression (Razon, 1981) but sons
are constantly warned by mothers not to get into fights and avoid
company who are prone to violence. Nevertheless, the boy-child has to
learn to defend himself and his family honor (Macalandong, et. al., 1977;
Mangawit, 1981). No research was found that looked into how parents
handled aggression among girls.

Discipline. Studies of disciplinary practices rarely mention any analysis

of gender differences in the frequency, severity and types of
punishment administered to children. But Sobritchea (1990) found
differences in the normative form of punishment for boys (beatings with
a wooden stick) and girls (pinching, slapping and scolding) in two rural
villages.

Adolescence

The adolescent years mark a period when the differential treatment of

sons and daughters become more pronounced. At the onset of
menarche, the girl-child is subjected to restrictions like not carrying
heavy loads (Jocano, 1970), not taking a bath (Jocano, 1970, Lagmay,
1983), wash her hair (Jocano, 1988) or wetting her feet (Lagmay, 1983).
Themes of constraint and control carry over in her deportment and
relations with the opposite sex. Although she may be courted (Jocano,
1988), she may not flirt (Mendez and Jocano, 1979a) or go out
unchaperoned (Baylon, 1975). She is urged to be careful and
circumspect in dealing with boys, often without explanation from
parents. It is in her adolescent years that the daughter experiences
more severe restraints on her behavior when compared to her brothers
(see Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Asprer, 1980; Porio, 1994).

4. Differential Family Investment in Daughters and Sons

There is disparity in the distribution of family resources in the rearing of

male and female children. Cabanero (1977) noted that girls were found
to require less food expenditures than males. The incidence of
malnutrition in the country has been found to be higher for girls than
boys (Food and Nutrition Research Institute 1989-1990 National
Nutrition Survey, cited in IBON Facts and Figures, 1993). Cabanero’s
rural families also spent more on clothing for male than female children.
But Gomez (1988) observed that parents in Cotobato City allocated
more of the family’s clothing budget to their daughters. Cabanero and
Gomez both noted that female children received greater schooling
outlays than their male counterparts. Both concluded that female
children were more expensive to raise but males enjoy greater outlay in
terms of family human capital.

5. Differences in the Responsibility Training of Daughters

and Sons

Responsibility training is a hallmark of Filipino child-rearing practices, it

begins early and proceeds quite systematically. A child’s responsibilities
at home (sent out on errands; Jocano, 1988; caring for younger siblings)
increases as he or she gets older. As a result of this training, children
become critical contributors of unpaid household work and child care
(Boulier, 1976). Boulier (1976) noted that the work of older children of
both sexes increased substantially their mothers’ leisure time
opportunities. The training continues through adolescence to prepare
the adolescent girls and boys for their future adult roles.

Tasks Assigned to Girls

The diverse tasks assigned to daughters are stereotypically feminine:

domestic, indoor, and nurturant (Licuanan and Gonzalez, 1976; Rojas-
Aleta, Silva and Eleazar, 1977; Pineda, 1981; Shimizu, 1984; Dionisio,
1994). Daughters assist in meal preparation (Baylon, 1975; Jocano,
1976; Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Estrada, 1983; Lagmay, 1983; Illo,
1988; Illo and Veneracion, 1988; Jocano, 1988; Sobritchea, 1990), wash
and iron clothes (Baylon, 1975; Lagmay, 1983; Jocano, 1976, 1988;
Sobritchea, 1990) and clean the house inside and outside (Jocano, 1976;
Mendez and Jocano, 1979a, Illo, 1988; Jocano, 1988). Gomez (1988)
noted that female children contribute more housework time than males
and become independent at an earlier age in terms of self-care.

Caring for younger siblings is a task expected of daughters. This

includes minding, feeding, rocking infants to sleep and watching over or
playing with toddlers and other children (Baylon, 1975; Boulier, 1976;
Popkin, 1976; Jocano, 1976; Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Estrada, 1983;
Lagmay, 1983; Illo, 1988; Illo and Veneracion, 1988; Jocano, 1988;
Sobritchea, 1990; Ocampo-Go, 1994). Popkin (1976) confirmed that by
ages 7 to 15, daughters act as mother substitutes. Older daughters
appear to substitute as well for their father’s childcare time by relatively
large amounts (Boulier, 1976).
Cabanero (1977) noted that Filipino children cease being “welfare
recipients” early on their lives. Girls, as well as boys, actively participate
in their families’ means of earning a living: planting, harvesting,
vending, preparing foodstuffs to sell (Jocano, 1988). Cabanero (1977)
found female children of low-wage mothers contributing to family
income as early as 9 to 11 years of age, while daughters of middle wage
mothers became net producers by ages 15 to 17 years. The National
Statistics Office (IBON Facts and Figures, 1996) reported that nearly 1.3
million girl-children are now working.

Tasks Assigned to Boys

The tasks assigned to boys are predominantly those requiring physical

strength and endurance, farther distance from the home and hardly any
socio-emotional skills.

Domestic chores revolve around fetching water (Baylon, 1975; Rojas-

Aleta and Eleazar, 1977; Licuanan, 1979; Lagmay, 1983; Illo, 1988;
Jocano, 1988; Sobritchea, 1990), going to the corner sari-sari store
(Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Estrada, 1983), sweeping the yard, lifting
the furniture and carrying heavy objects.

Generally, “household chores are not assigned to them unless there are
no girls in the family.” (Mendez and Jocano, 1979a). Furthermore, “…
boys are generally excluded from participating in tasks attributed to as
feminine.” (Estrada, 1983), and “…no male is expected to do household
chores which are considered to be female undertaking.” (Ramirez,
1988). But they also provide some relief to their mothers as boys are
required to put in child care hours when the girls’ services are not
available (Lagmay, 1983).

In rural communities, boys assist in the economic activities of their

parents in a variety of ways: guarding against foraging domestic
animals, plowing the fields (Mangawit, 1981; Estrada, 1983; Jocano,
1988; Sobritchea, 1990), herding and pasturing cows and carabaos
(Baylon, 1975; Illo, 1999; Illo and Veneracion, 1988; Jocano, 1988), and
caring for livestock and other domestic animals (Rojas-Aleta et.al., 1977;
Mangawit, 1981; Shimizu, 1984).

Sons of fishermen assist by running the motor, paddling (Jocano, 1988;

Sobritchea, 1990), repairing agricultural implements or mending fishing
gear.

Among urban streetchildren in Metro Manila and Cebu they watch cars,
shine shoes, peddle cigarettes, newspapers and candies.
Cabanero (1977) found that sons of low-wage and middle- wage mothers
represent net financial gains to their families by ages 12 to 14 years,
while high-wage mothers realize positive returns from their sons at the
age of 15 to 17.

Rationale for Gender-Biased Task Assignments

The responsibility training of sons and daughters is seen as preparatory

to their assumption of the conventional masculine role of “head of the
family” and feminine role of “housewife”, thereby safeguarding the
status quo and perpetuating society’s patriarchal standards. However,
an alternative view suggests that sons as well as daughters must
concern themselves with the various aspects of household management.
Estrada (1983) observed some mothers in the Tarlac area instructed and
encouraged their sons on the proper attitude and skills in doing
household chores regardless of the supposed gender-labeling of these
tasks. Bulatao (1978) found that mothers expected household help
equally from daughter and sons. While both Licuanan (1979) and Illo
(1988) concede that there are still differences in the primary ranked
tasks for sons and daughters (as well as for mothers and fathers), they
argue that rarely are the boundaries firm between what men and
women can and in fact do. More contemporary studies like the Mc Cann
Erikson survey (1995) have determined that men (especially those in
the middle class) are gradually yielding to the pressure of getting more
involved in domestic chores which used to be only reserved for their
wives.

6. Parents as Models: Differences in Child- Rearing

Responsibilities of Mothers and Fathers

A review of the studies shows how Filipino mothers and fathers act
differently even when both are exercising their child-rearing
responsibilities. The mother is still ranked as the primary caretaker of
her children (Mendez and Jocano, 1979a; Licuanan, 1979; Lagmay,
1983; Minoza et. al., 1984; UP-CHE, 1985). Hollnsteiner (1979) noted
that “…In the rural areas, the roles of family members are clearly
prescribed ... in the urban or urbanized families, the roles and privileges
are less clearly delineated, especially since the mother’s role has
become multifaceted and less structured.” Middle Socio-Economic
Status (SES) working mothers (Sycip, 1982) still carried the greater bulk
of the responsibility for the home and the children. Thus, a majority of
the respondents experienced difficulty in combining and balancing their
multiple roles of wife, mother, and worker. Child care time significantly
affected the mother’s leisure time. Gomez (1988) found that children of
all ages experiences longer child care hours from mothers and fathers. It
was observed that over-protection was the most pervasive attitude that
mothers exhibit towards their children (Espina, 1996).

The Filipino father’s main role is that family provider. His role as a child
caretaker is considered only secondary. Father’s affection towards their
children is limited to carrying them, talking, and playing with them
(Licuanan, 1979). Lapuz (1987) described the Filipino father as a “…
remote person…feeling awkward in getting close (to his sons)”.
Discipline is one aspect of child-rearing where fathers figure
prominently; either on their own parental capacity or in concert with
their wives (Porio, Lynch and Hollnsteiner, 1978; Licuanan, 1979;
Lagmay, 1983; Minoza et.al. , 1984; UP-CHE, 1985; David, 1994).
Fathers also tend to be more involved in disciplining older children
(David, 1994) and sons rather than daughters (Porio et.al., 1978). With
his role in his domain of discipline, the father –child relationship is
characterized by authority, restriction, obedience and control.

The Girl Child: Who is She and What is She Like?

This section inquires about the possible outcomes of the ways in which
Filipino children were raised and described in terms of behavior,
including the social, emotional, cognitive aspects as well as attitudes
and perceptions toward gender-related subjects, and lastly, the issue on
gender identity. A profile of the girl -child is discerned from the various
studies as it concentrated on the girl-child in relation to the boy-child.

Gender Differences in Behavior

Affiliation. The girl-child is known to be more affiliative with friends and

family (Alano, 1980; Jimenez, 1983), have a more positive outlook, are
warm-hearted and trustful, as opposed to boys who are more aloof and
distrustful (Ramiro, 1978), and less friendly (Licuanan, 1971).

Emotionality, Stress and Coping. Girls were found to react more

emotionally when faced with a family crisis, feeling more self-pity and
misery (Naval, 1979). They were also more sentimental and prone to
jealousy (Espina, 1996). Girls suffer higher level of stress (Feramil, 1989)
but do not differ from boys in how they cope. Barrameda (1989) noted
that girls from single-parent homes, more than boys, tend to resort to a
passive-hostile type of coping.

Task-persistence. Girls have been judged to be more task-persistent

than boys (Asprer, 1980; Minoza et. al, 1984; Ramirez, 1993), except in
Naval’s study (1979) of urban poor children. Asprer (1980) and Ramirez
(1993) explained that this may be the result of parents’ imposition of a
stricter regimen of responsibility training as compared to a less stringent
one for boys.

Aggression. Most gender comparisons on aggression affirm cross-

cultural findings that girls are less physically aggressive than boys
(Naval, 1979; Mendez and Jocano, 1979b; Mangawit, 1981; Jimenez,
1982; Minoza, et. al., 1984; Adorio, 1985; Raya, 1986). But both girls
and boys appear to display similar levels of verbal aggression (Minoza
et. al. , 1984). Girls were found to be more punitive than boys in
attributing punishment to their parents (Ilan and Tan, 1969).

Self-concept. Studies do not agree on whether boys and girls view

themselves differently,. Cheng (1995) and Espina (1996) reported that
girls have a slightly higher self-concept than boys while Ventura (1994)
found otherwise.

Gender Differences in Abilities

Cognitive Abilities. There are no documented marked differences in

boys’ and girls’ “innate” cognitive abilities (Orejana, 1981; Carza, 1981;
Ventura, 1994). However, Ventura (1994) reported that males related to
more analytic, impersonalistic, task-oriented, and field-independent
ways of thinking. In domestic competencies, girls predictably scored
higher, while boys earned better marks for competency in outdoor
chores.

Achievement Orientation. There are conflicting findings regarding

achievement orientation of girls and boys. Some studies show that boys
tend to project deeper concerns with academic performance, recognition
and achievement (Alano, 1980; Jimenez, 1983). But others have
characterized the adolescent girl as being more strongly driven by
achievement motives (Licuanan, 1971) and academic strivings (Mendez
and Jocano, 1976b).

Gender Differences in Attitudes

Attitudes toward Parental Roles. Children perceive their parents

differently according to gender-based parental behaviors and styles.
Yan’s (1984) 13 to 21 year old subjects agreed that the mother should
“attend to their children’s clothing and food,” and “see that the children
get to school on time”. They also agreed that the father should “provide
for the basic needs of the family”, and “be a disciplinarian”.
Macrohom (1978)found that female and male adolescents persistently
believe that the husband’s role is to look after the family investment and
business and take charge of its physical security while the wife’s role is
family planning and home management. Children more often turned to
their mothers for care and support (Pelino, 1984).

Although only a fraction of Pelino’s (1994) subjects saw discipline as

exclusive to the father, Lagmay (1983) reported that “many of the
children show greater submission to him”. Yan (1984) noted that the
father as family disciplinarian was generally accepted across
demographic, economic and socio-cultural groupings. He is also
associated with greater achievement-orientation, as fathers, more often
than mothers, encourage both sons and daughters in their schoolwork
(Gamboa, Luciano, Cruz and Laforteza, 1972).

Though the mother is seen as powerful (Carunungan-Robles, 1987), her

power appears confined to the household. A majority of the respondents
saw the mothers rather than the fathers as the locus of household
decision-making. This supported “… previous findings that household
and family affairs are seen (by children) as the realm of women than
men” (Raymundo, 1994).

In sum, Filipino children view their parents in gender stereotypical

fashion, mirroring the gender-differentiated parenting they experience
from their mothers and fathers.

Attitudes Toward Other Gender Roles. Investigators are unanimous in

describing the persistent stereotyping of other gender roles among
children of both genders. Children maintain that there are occupation
types specifically for males or females (only men can work as carpenter,
driver, soldier, policeman, while secretary, teacher or sewer can only be
female). De la Cruz’ (1986) subjects saw law and medicine as
occupations that can be suitably filled by both genders.

Bantug (1996) observed fewer female respondents than males who

believe that either sex should not be barred from doing traditionally
male or female jobs. The female adolescents believed there are traits
that are properly “masculine” and activities that are peculiar to only
males. The male adolescents enumerated activities as being exclusive
to males. But the respondents were convinced the roles of men and
women are no changing (Bantug, 1996). They were aware that more
Filipino women today have careers and head their households.

Attitudes Toward Own Gender and the Opposite Gender. Among Filipino
children, there seems to be a more positive attitude towards girls (Pablo,
1971). But when asked whether they would rather be a boy or a girl, the
children in the Flores and Gonzales study (1969), regardless of gender,
preferred to be boys. At an early age, both girls and boys are keenly
conscious of the fact that in our society, being male means being
privileged.

Attitudes Toward Sexuality. In general, adolescents believe virginity is

still an important virtue (Zablan, 1995; Bantug, 1996). Fewer girls
approved of having sex prior to marriage compared to boys. There were
also fewer girls who claimed to have engaged in pre-marital sex than
boys.

Gender Identity

The few studies which focused on gender identity confirm that in the
normal course of gender identity formation, the girl-child and boy-child
identify with their same-sex parent. Mendez and Jocano (1979a)
reported that during their childhood years, girls naturally become closer
to their mothers while boys become closer to their fathers. Lapuz (1987)
made the same observation with respect to mother –daughter
relationship but took exception to the father-son relationship. This is
supported by the McCann Erickson (1993) survey which featured the
Filipino sons’ complaints of their fathers’ emotional distance and lack of
involvement. Studies of parent-child relationship in the context of
gender identity formation have also observed close cross-sex affiliation
between parents and children. Mendez and Jocano (1979a) noted that
fathers were usually fonder of their daughters, while mothers were
fonder of their sons. Cabanero (1977) and Gomez (1988) provided
additional evidence that mothers spent more time with sons at all ages.
In Cotobato, infants received an equal amount of child care time from
their mothers regardless of gender. Infant sons, however, enjoyed
relatively more attention from older siblings, relative and domestic
helpers than infant daughters (Gomez, 1988).

Ramirez (1988) described that the Filipino mother as more likely than
the father to attach to, indulge, and even spoil their son. This could be
the reason why more boys than girls experienced difficulty in
consolidating their sex –role identity as suggested by the observation
that there were more male than female homosexuals (Asprer, 1980).

Yet even as girls may lose out on their parents’ favor when in
competition with their brothers, they demonstrate more positive
attitudes toward their parents than do the boys (Pablo, 1971). This is
understandable given cultural expectations on daughters to be more
unconditionally nurturant and caring.
While the boys and girls both report being closer to their mothers than
their fathers (Mendez and Jocano, 1979b), both (mothers and fathers)
are equally loved (Pablo, 1971; Vajanarat, 1973), and the youth continue
to name their mothers and fathers as the persons they admire most
(McCann Erickson, 1993). This supports the view that Filipino children
easily learn to spend their affections, attachments, and loyalties to both
parental figures (Guthrie and Jacobs, 1966; Carandang, 1979; Shimizu,
1984).

Synthesis and Discussion

All these studies on girl-child underscore that society’s gender

expectations ans parental socialization practices influence the
behaviors, attitudes, and future role of the girl-child. They revealed that
parental gender-related beliefs echo society’s expectations and are
actualized child-rearing practices.

Highlighted are the following points:

*Studies on society’s expectations agree that in Filipino culture, women

are expected to be the main source of care and nurturance for her
children. Men, on the other hand, are expected to be the family’s
primary source of financial support.

*In general, Filipino parents have expressed preferences for daughters

and sons for various reasons. Daughters are preferred so they can help
in household chores and provide assistance even when they are already
married.

*Parents want their daughters to help in the house, be demure, obedient

and friendly, while sons are expected to be able to defend themselves in
a fight, as well as endure physical pain.

*Parents seem to have no differential expectations for their sons and

daughters when it comes to aspirations.

*The empirical evidence reveals that by school age, there is a separation

of the sexes which reinforces in children the differences between males
and females.

*In terms of play, rough and physical games are associated with boys
while girls often play indoors with dolls, role playing activities performed
in the home. There are some games enjoyed by both girls and boys.
*It was found that boys are given more freedom while girls are more
restricted in terms of rules for social activities.

*Parents are also more permissive towards male children when it comes
to handling aggression.

*Most parents believe girls can be more easily disciplined, obey more
readily, and learn faster from their mistakes.

*Studies comparing family investment on boys and girls reported that

girls require less food expenditures, and consequently consume less
food. Girls received greater schooling outlays.

*There were differences in assigned tasks between genders when it

came to housework and economic activities of their parents. Girls’ tasks
are domestic, indoors and nurturant; boys’ tasks require physical
strength, farther from the home, and hardly any emotional skills.

*Parents have also been reported to model traditional gender roles, e.g.
mother as the caretaker of children, father as provider.

*Studies describe the girl-child as more affiliative, emotional, persistent,

and stressed compared to the boy-child. She is less physically
aggressive.

*There is expectation that girls be more nurturant and caring for other
people, especially family members.

*It is more acceptable for girls to express her emotions while boys are
trained not to cry and to “suffer in silence”.

*Children in both genders agree with traditional gender roles and sex-
role stereotyping of occupations but they also perceive change occurring
in this area.

*Both genders agree that being male in Philippine society means having
more privileges, freedom and power.

Conclusions

Based on the literature review, the family continues to be a major site of

the gender socialization of children. The girl-child and boy-child are
raised and treated differently within the family. But the studies do not
seem to show that the girl-child is oppressed. She is treated differently
and disadvantaged because of restrictions she has to contend with
being compared with the boy-child.
The girl-child has more responsibilities inside the house as training for
the role she is expected to perform in the future. The boy –child is
trained to work outside the house that prepares and conditions him for a
wider range of future vocations. If society continues to view household
work as inferior work, it might be concluded that the girl child is indeed
disadvantaged and restricted in her future options.

Most of the literature reviewed discussed gender only incidentally. Child-

rearing studies rarely used gender as an analytic variable. Studies on
gender, on the other hand, did not emphasize child-rearing and how
gender stereotypes and differences develop. The direct relationship
between child-rearing practices and formation of gender roles and
stereotypes has not been established in empirical research. Future
investigations should make a conscious effort to include these variables
in the planning, conduct and analysis of research.

Factors which significantly affect gender socialization must also be

addressed: peer socialization, school, church and media.

Recommendations

In light of the study’s findings, recommendations have been prepared

for consideration by institutions involved in child-rearing and gender
socialization in the Philippines: the family, schools, the media, non-
governmental organizations and government institutions.

What Parents Can Do

*Develop the attitude that children should be valued equally,

regardless of their
gender and functional contributions to the family.

*Maintain gender-free expectations of all family members avoiding

gender clichés
such as “boys will be boys” and ‘kasi babae..” (“because she’s a
girl…”).

*Encourage both sons and daughters to aspire for the highest of

their potential in their study, work and abilities.

*Teach sons and daughters the sincere expression and resolution

of their emotions.
 *Select toys that are safe, non-violent, growth-promoting,
stimulating and educational instead of gender-based toys like
guns for boys and dolls for girls.

*Encourage children to play a variety of games, cross-cutting

gender stereotypes.

*Provide equal time and standards for play, fun, leisure and
relaxation both sons and daughters.

*Ensure same opportunities for sons and daughters to be curious,

to explore, to discover their interests and abilities and to
experiment with various possibilities of being.

*Adopt gender-free rules and standards of discipline inn the family

in all areas of behavior.

*Examine the distribution of resources within the family and

eliminate gender-based inequalities.

*Foster an attitude of “our work” which family members can share

according to age, skill and interest and not according to gender.

*Provide responsible sex education using information that is

appropriate to the children’s stage of development.

*Both mothers and fathers should be role models of nurturance

and assertiveness.

What Schools Can Do

*Create school environments that are free of gender biases

especially against girl-children.

*Examine and revise school curricula, instructional materials and

textbooks that are still reinforce conventional images and gender
biases.

*Proactively create new curricula to improve self-image and the

perception of study and work opportunities for girls especially in
fields where women have been underrepresented.

*Promote full and equal participation of girls in extra-curricular

activities.
 *Utilize Parent-Teacher Associations, individual parent-teacher
conferences and the likes to create parents and caregivers on the
responsibilities and values of shared parenting and gender biases.

*Conduct gender sensitization training for teachers, school

administrators and guidance counselors.

*Provide full and free access to appropriate health education and

counseling for adolescent girls.

*Fund and promote more research on child-rearing, especially in

families that are usually underrepresented in such research.

*Fund and promote more research on the situation of the girl-child

and require researchers to disaggregate and analyze the data on
children by gender and age. Lobby for these research findings to
be included in policy-making and program development for the
girl-child.

What the Media Can Do

*Reinforce gender-equal child-rearing by portraying plot lines of

“alternative”
families instead of traditional child-rearing practices, gender-
stereotypes and inequalities.

*Help educate the public, through feature articles, documentaries,

public for a and
discussions on gender equality in child-rearing practices and
beliefs.

*Inform and educate the public on the more extreme forms of

discrimination against the girl-child, such as rape, physical abuse,
neglect, etc.

*Disseminate information on where to report cases of girl child

abuse, exploitation and neglect.

What Non-Governmental Organizations (NGOs) Can Do

*Help eliminate biased treatment of the girl-child by lobbying the

government,
schools and media to project and to promote balanced, non-
stereotyped images of
 girls and boys.

*Organize and sponsor seminars, symposia and workshops for

parents and caregivers on non-gender biased child-rearing
practices and attitudes.

*Help generate awareness on the various forms of discrimination

against the girl-child .

*Require gender-sensitization trainings for those involved in the

healing, rehabilitation and other support programs for girls who
have been victimized.

*Demand and participate in regular progress reviews of the

situation of the girl children at international, national and regional
levels.

What the Government Can Do

*Encourage and support families and all private sectors in their

efforts to promote gender-equal, child-rearing attitudes and
practices.

*Utilize government-required programs such as pre-marital family

planning sessions and counseling to assist future parents in
forming more positive, gender-equal attitudes and child-rearing
practices.

*Raise the level of awareness of policy-makers, planners,

administrators and implementors in all areas of the government
on the disadvantaged situation of the girl-child.

*Require all government and publicly- funded research on health,

education, labor and other areas to disaggregate and analyze data
by gender and age of children.

*Take firm and concrete measures to eliminate all forms of

discrimination against the girl-child. Protect all children by
enacting the laws on child labor.

*Review the progress of the situation of the girl-child at national

and regional levels regularly.