Sarah Chimileski

8 November 2021

The Class of Covid-19:

The Socialization Gaps and Psychology Within Grief and Loss

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of overcoming it.” - Helen Keller

March 13th, 2020. The sky was blue, the air was crisp, and I had a world of opportunities

in front of me. I was head teacher of my preschool internship, president of the peer leaders

program, a section leader in band, first chair wind ensemble on flute, and I was preparing to

play in the musicals pit orchestra that year. I was a senior in high school. I had the rug swept

right out from under me that day. The comfort of knowing that everything I worked towards

would pay off with a walk in regalia in June and a night of unforgettable memories and dancing

one last time in May, now burned down to uncertainty and pity.

In the face of adversity, we rose. Instead of looking at the negatives of not getting to walk

at graduation, no prom, and not even a chance to walk the halls one more time, we persevered.

Through the trauma of our goals and the graduation milestone being ripped from our hopeful

hands. We as a class, whether a senior in high school, a senior in college, or even an 8th grader

closing their chapter on middle school, we all faced significant loss. I remember my mom being

married to the TV screen at 2PM every day to get the Covid case updates from the governor.

She anxiously sat and fear filled her body as every case was mentioned and she wondered if

she would ever see my grandma again in a normal environment. We followed precautions to a T

in my house. We never came in contact with people outside of our pod, we wiped down

groceries with lysol wipes, we even had to shower after every outing to the grocery stores to
ensure that we were being safe. As much as this was the way of life we had adapted to, I

realized I lost a huge part of me with being social.

Socialization is a huge part of human growth and development. We strive for connection

as human beings and having a pandemic where you can only interact with the people you live

with took a huge toll on people socially at all ages. According to Kevin Sikali, a psychologist who

wrote for ncbi says, “To society, social distancing presents the dangers of increasing social

rejection, growing impersonality and individualism, and the loss of a sense of community. It

negatively affects learning and growth, and it prevents people from effectively socializing, which

is a fundamental human need”. We are living in a world where the children that were born in

2020 are going to struggle forming relationships and friendships in the future because they were

forced to be isolated as newborns. Even preschoolers, they have odds pinned against them

because they were right on track to learn and develop their socialization skills and then they

were pulled out of school and forced to isolate, they lost the foundation of social skills that were

in the process of being built. At the elementary, middle, and high school level, it wasn’t as much

as foundational socialization skills that were lost but milestones in socialization. These students

were not able to build and maintain relationships and friendships as easily due to the loss of

physical contact. Physical contact as simple as a hug was forbidden outside of your “pod”. A

hug, according to Paulette Delgado, a researcher and writer for The Institute For The Future of

Education, “produces oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin, hormones that help people feel good

and feel less stressed and anxious. These factors are critical to the well-being of young people

as the percentage of adolescents with mental health problems has increased to 47% in males

and 65% in women”. Along with losing our sense of self due to lack of socialization, covid also

wrecked havoc on us psychologically and we are still seeing the after effects.
 Covid-19 shut down the entire world. We, as a population, believed that it would be

nothing short of sinister if we snuck out past 8pm or saw our beloved family members who did

not live with us. This kind of isolation took a huge toll on us psychologically. Even taking a step

back from death and grief, we grieved for the loss of milestones and celebrations. We grieved

the loss of not being able to see our new family members be born, or our cousins get married.

We watched as high school and college seniors lost a chance to play a sport they loved for the

very last time, or to smile as they accepted the diploma or degree they worked so tirelessly for.

We are fortunate enough to have video chat programs like Facetime, Zoom, Teams, etc, but

nothing replaces the feeling that being in-person for such events brings. As time went on

though, we learned that life does get better and that this way of living would not last forever.

With that though came jealousy. The class of 2020 lost out on those precious milestones like

graduation and prom. Whereas the class of 2021 in most states, was able to get that back. All

you could do was be envious that they had the experiences you were forced to miss out on.

Although jealousy and anger are incredibly valid emotions to feel, it makes you feel terrible

inside.

In my book I will touch base the socialization gaps and issues that Covid-19 caused in

people ranging from 1-22 (covid babies to college seniors who graduated in 2020). I will also

dive into the psychological aspect of covid-19 and dealing with grief and loss. This take will go

in-depth into the stages of grief and will take a closer look at the jealousy and anger side of it. I

will also talk about grief and loss within death. I plan on also talking within the psychology

section about burnout and how students (especially highschool and college seniors) can cope

and deal with burnout as both of those classes are in two very different places in life from where

they started right before Covid.