Falling Headlong

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/27575822.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
Relationship: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn
Character: Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī, Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Lán Huàn | Lán
Xīchén, Niè Huáisāng, Niè Míngjué, Luó "Mián Mián" Qīngyáng, Jiāng
Chéng | Jiāng Wǎnyín, Jiāng Yànlí, Lán Qǐrén
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe -
College/University, this au is SOFT and KIND, folks we've got HAND
HOLDING, and romantic ARTICLE CRITIGUES, and SKATING
LESSONS, it is in fact a, skater au, First Meetings, First Kiss, Getting
Together, autistic lan wangji, Autistic Character, i just love writing happy
wangxian and that is what you will get here, and embarassing Lan
Drunkji, Spanish Translation
Stats: Published: 2020-11-15 Completed: 2020-12-31 Chapters: 16/16 Words:
35505

Falling Headlong
by floraidh

Summary

In his third year of university in Shanghai, Lan Wangji promises his brother to try 21 new
things before his 21st birthday. Apart from joining the Debate Society and learning to
skateboard by himself...it's not going well

That is until a brilliant but wild student crash lands into his life. Someone who makes Lan
Wangji want to step out of his small, predictable life and try something very, very new...

+++

Read for cute wangxian, romcom misunderstandings with happy endings, roller derby,
romantic academia, autistic Lan Wangji POV and some very spicy noodles!

Notes

I wanna say a massive thanks to @defenestratingreason for helping concept, characterise

and proofread this fic - it would not have been written without them! I would highly
recommend checking out their writing on here too!

There's loads of amazing skater au art, this fic was partly inspired (with permission) by
@valdrift on tumblr, check out their skater au tag!
Check out the end of each chapter for notes on the setting and extra bits that didn't make it
into the story :D

UPDATE: Someone has very kindly started translating this into Spanish, you can find this
here: https://www.wattpad.com/story/264624238?
utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_un
 Debate Society
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“-therefore, this House concludes with the statement ‘it is the responsibility of all citizens to protect
the weak in society’ and refutes the idea proposed by the First Speaker.”

Lan Wangji tightens his left fist behind his back. Almost there . He continues to look directly
between his opponent’s eyebrows, just as the debate instructor had told him to.

“We all have the right to protection, and therefore responsibility to provide it to others. To suggest
we do not have this responsibility, also negates our irrefutable right.”

Wangji nods his head to indicate his speech has concluded. As he sits, he registers a small smatter
of applause which suggests his First Opposition was well received. A sudden wolf whistle rings out
from somewhere in the debate hall behind him, followed by a few laughs.

Inappropriate.

Lan Wangji purposefully does not turn. Someone is making fun of me , he thinks. He feels heat
spread across his face and presses his lips together, still looking forward. His teammates lean in
from either side and Wangji shifts back from them slightly.

“That was good, they clearly weren’t expecting your rights vs responsibility argument. The Second
Proposition is going to have a hard time recovering,” hisses Luo Qingyang. She smiles and shows
her teeth.

“Yeh,” agrees Nie Huaisang, “and the way you stared at Jin Zixun the whole time really worked
too. He looks like he’s going to piss his pants.”

Wangji turns with concern to look at their team’s Second Speaker. “I sincerely hope he doesn’t.”

Both his teammates snicker and Wangji realises a beat too late that Huaisang wasn’t talking
literally. At least they found it amusing. The Speaker of the House clears her throat and the debate
resumes.

The wolf-whistle pierces through the applause again when their team is declared victorious.
Wangji stands, trying to ignore it, and gathers his laptop bag and skateboard. He wants to get out
before the audience crowds the exit, and is turning to go when Luo Qingyang calls him.

“Hey, Lan Wangji! You skate, right?”

He is not sure if teaching himself for three months counts as skateboarding but nods in reply,
eyeing the exit which is beginning to become crowded.

“We both do too! Roller skating, that is, we’re actually in the same roller derby team.” Huaisang
continues. “There’s a derby match on Saturday at the arena on campus. We’re inviting all our
friends to watch!”

Something twinges inside Lan Wangji. Somehow everyone around him has made friends since
joining university. Despite the noise of a derby being very unappealing, part of him still wishes he
would be included in the invite. But it would be rude to invite himself, to assume, so Wangji just
presses out a polite, flat response.

“I hope you enjoy it. See you at Debate Society next week.”

He is almost at the exit when a person who was leaning against the door frame steps towards him.

“Hey! You made really good points there. I liked your bit about responsibility, did you write it?”

Lan Wangji glances up into the brightly smiling face of a young man dressed in dark, casual
clothes. He spins his phone between pinched thumb and forefinger as he talks. There’s something
in his easy, open manner that makes Wangji’s heart beat a little faster. He looks away and the
stranger tilts his head, trying to maintain eye contact.

“I did.” Wangji had spent a long time preparing his opposition speech. It was hard to get
everything into his four minute window and he feels all the extra information he gathered bubbling
up inside himself.

“I feel like there are a whole load of contexts that could be applied in. What gave you the idea?”
The stranger smiles more widely and steps forwards slightly. Wangji shifts back, but he finds
himself becoming excited that someone is interested in his topic. It feels like permission to share
and Wangji’s bubbling thoughts escape through his mouth.

“The current concept of human rights is relatively new, although the Code of Hammurabi, which is
over 3500 years old, establishes the theme within some of the earliest known legal codes. The
concepts are more clearly solidified within The Charter of Medina, and later in the writings of John
Locke and Thomas Payne. ”

Lan Wangji is aware he is starting into one of his ‘lectures’ as Xichen fondly calls them, and
glances back up. The stranger’s face is still, his lips slightly parted. He seems to register that
Wangji has stopped speaking and blinks twice, twisting his phone between his hands.

“Hmm?” The stranger’s blank look is shaken by a short laugh into an easy smile. Wangji
swallows, looks away. How can a smile be so distracting? He blinks and continues, trying to be
concise.

“The point where right and responsibility intersects can be quite differently framed between
cultures. I was inspired by an article that frames right and responsibility within the teachings of
Kong Fuzi. Choice, Freedom and Responsibility within Ancient Chinese Confucianism . Kim,
2013.”

Wangji looks up again and actively bites his tongue. The stranger is now looking at his own phone
and his smile is gone. He looks like he might be texting someone and is clearly distracted. I did it
again, Lan Wangji berates himself for boring yet another potential friend.

“You should read it.” He says, unsure how else to end the conversation and steps out of the hall.
He secures his bag over his shoulder and drops his skateboard. As he begins to roll away, a voice
calls out something from behind him. Lan Wangji doesn’t turn around. Gaining momentum on the
ramp he speeds away, pushing himself farther, faster, letting the pressure of the warm wind ease
away his discomfort.
-

Safely back in the quiet of home, Lan Wangji turns on his phone, takes a screenshot of the notes
for today’s speech and sends a message.

LWJ: New Thing #4 - Competed in a debate.

LWJ: [image attached]

LWJ: I was First Opposition and we won.

Almost immediately the typing bubble appears…

LXC: I knew you would

LXC: Here’s mine! (I’m on 9 already!)

LXC: [video attached]

The video takes a second to load then a shaky, portrait-framed clip of his brother appears. Lan
Xichen is standing opposite a man who is around his height, but just about twice as wide. They are
sparring, both equipped with boxing gloves and padded helmets.

Wangji smiles as he watches Xichen dodge a forceful jab and land two precise hits on his
opponent's chest. Another message appears over the video.

LXC: See! I am learning to be more assertive. What’s your next one going to be?

Lan Wangji stares at his phone. It’s been almost four months since he promised Xichen he’d try
twenty one new things before his 21st birthday. He’s only just built up to number four and the task
is starting to feel a little impossible. Xichen is doing twenty five before his 25th and has already
pulled way ahead.

If he’s ever going to complete the challenge, something’s going to have to change. He thinks about
the stranger from that afternoon, the way he had taken the time to talk to him and his bright, bright
smile. Although he doesn’t dare type it, Lan Wangji thinks to himself:

New Thing # 5 - make a friend

Chapter End Notes

Notes

This is gonna be a slow build up, but Wangji is already thinking about that stranger
with the bright smile… (WWX definitely wasn’t being rude by the way, he was
writing something down because his memory is...not too reliable, but LWJ
misinterpreted it)

I’m writing Lan Wangji as autistic as that is absolutely how he reads to me. My
writing is based very much on my own experiences though, so I hope it does justice to
other people’s headcanons!

LQY and NHS were actually inviting him to the match, it’s just that their language
wasn’t concrete enough. I’ve lost count of the number of times this has happened to
me!

Can you tell I got very interested in the history of human rights and the philosophy of
responsibility while writing this? Like Lan Zhan, I had to restrain myself from turning
his explanation into an essay!!

If you also want to take the dive, here is a link to a summary of the article he
recommended:
https://www.jstor.org/stable/43285803?seq=1

And here is the full article, for download:

https://booksc.xyz/book/51086444/adb678

I would also recommend the Wikipedia article on the History of Human Rights as a
good starting point for further research, as it does provide at least a basic introduction
to non-western contexts. Including the Codes and Charters that Wangji mentions.

Please come and interact in the comments, I’d love to hear your thoughts!
 Friends
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Birdsong and the hum of early morning traffic greet Lan Wangji as he removes his noise-
cancelling headphones and pulls out his earbuds, ready to skate. The headphones are too precious
to risk damaging if he falls. He glances around the skate park as he cues up the recording of
yesterday’s lecture.

Despite being on SJTU campus, the park is always deserted before morning classes begin. Skating
had started as a cheap way to get from his little apartment to the University without the bustle of
public transport. Now it is becoming a morning ritual where he listens to yesterday’s lecture and
practices.

Lan Wangji knows he should wear a helmet, but there’s something about the wind rushing through
his hair as he skates that just feels so right. Like he’s flying.

He balances on the edge of the smallest drop in the park, breathes, and tips forward. The little rush
of air is exhilarating and he powerslides, angling the board towards a gentle ramp. The lecturer’s
voice drones in his ear, Wangji has read three separate articles that indicate information is retained
better while exercising. He continues his normal round of the park, building up to the biggest drop.

He is just tipping off its edge when a flash of red catches his eye, and his head turns automatically.
It's the stranger who spoke to him yesterday. His mouth is slightly open and he is looking directly
at Lan Wangji.

Attention distracted, Wangji’s balance is thrown off and his board wobbles precariously. He just
manages to control it, trying desperately to appear poised. He skids to a halt at the bottom of the
ramp, pulse slightly raised by the near miss. The sudden stop knocks one earbud out and he bends
to retrieve it.

Two other people have joined the stranger at the edge of the park, all three wearing roller skates.
The stranger is still looking at him with that open-mouthed expression. Wangji pushes his long hair
back and kneels for his earbud. Inexplicably, he feels his cheeks reddening.

“I’m gonna ask him!”

“He always skates alone. Xianxian, we shouldn’t disturb-”

Wangji realises that, mortifyingly, the roller skaters are talking about him and he keeps his eyes
down. Dark red skates slide into Wangji’s vision. His eyes travel upwards, over black knee pads,
snagging for a moment on the bright red shorts that had first distracted him. Blinking, he takes a
quick look at the young man’s smiling face again and glances away from his intent gaze.

“You’re Lan Wangji, right? Qingyang’s friend?”

Wangji isn’t sure how to answer, because his name is correct but Luo Qingyang has never said
they are friends. He hesitates and the roller skater fills the silence.

“I’m Wei Wuxian. You were too fast for me yesterday, so I brought my skates today.” The young
man tips forward and back onto his toe stops as he talks, making his ponytail swing. Wangji’s eyes
settle on a spot above Wei Wuxian’s shoulder. “You should come to our roller derby tomorrow.
Qingyang and Huaisang really want you to come.”

But they didn’t invite me. Wangji thinks this distractedly because he is trying to remember where
exactly he has heard the name Wei Wuxian before.

“So you’ll come, right?”

Still processing, Lan Wangji stands up to give himself more time and picks up his skateboard. Wei
Wuxian tips forward on his toe stops again and smiles down at him. We’d be the same height if he
were wearing shoes. The thought pushes coherent speech out of reach once again.

With the skates on, Wangji’s eyes are almost in line with the skater’s lips, which are in the process
of breaking into another perfect smile. His lips are slightly chapped, as if they have been bitten.

“Not so much to say when you can’t include citations? How’s this for a quote: ‘ I’ll come to the
roller derby with you’ (Lan, 2018) . How does that sound?”

“Ridiculous.”

The onslaught of chatter is wearing Lan Wangji down and the honest response jumps out before he
can stop it. Somehow his terse tone doesn’t seem to deter Wei Wuxian. He only laughs, apparently
tired of being stationary, and starts to circle Wangji in lazy loops. Wangji stands still, unsure if he
is being teased.

Wei Wuxian. How do I know that name?

“It’s our first derby as a team, and we’re all supposed to bring a friend to support us. Can I tell
Qingyang you’ll come as mine?”

A Friend. Friend. Friend. The word and all its implications bounce around Wangji’s mind until it
works its way out of his mouth.

“Friend?”

“I knew you’d say yes! I’ll get her to text you the address and see you tomorrow!” Wei Wuxian
spins once on the spot, his loose black shirt billowing out around him, and speeds off to the two
skaters at the other end of the park. “Guys, he said yes!”

Wangji’s phone buzzes once in his pocket, a reminder that class will start in 15 minutes. He’s glad
of the reason to escape, and quickly steps onto his skateboard. Grabbing his bag from the bench, he
speeds towards the lecture hall.

With 10 minutes to spare, Wangji arrives and climbs the steps of the lecture hall to his usual seat in
the far back right corner. Only then does it settle on him, exactly what the exchange means. He
pulls out his phone.

LWJ: New Thing #5 - made a friend.

‘Lan Xichen is typing...’ appears almost instantly and Wangji wonders if Xichen’s internship is
giving him enough work to do.
 LXC: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LXC: !!!!!!!!

LXC: Where did you meet? What’s their name?

Wangji hesitates, unsure which characters are used in his new friend’s name. He taps the voice
message button and speaks quietly.

“We met at the debate, and then at the skatepark. His name is Wei Wuxian.”

Even saying the name aloud, Lan Wangji just cannot shake the feeling he has heard it somewhere
before. Wei Wuxian. A small smile climbs up his lips.

Chapter End Notes

Notes

I hope I’m managing to get across LWJ’s interior world! Navigating friendships is so
hard, especially when social boundaries are largely unspoken. It's a good job WWX is
so tenacious, and isn’t at all deterred by one word answers.

Also I set it in 2018 when getting close to someone didn’t come with a hundred extra
considerations, hope that's okay? I literally just had to pick a year for WWX to make
that citation joke.

Does anybody else study as they exercise? I used to take my textbooks to the gym. I
got a lot of odd looks but it definitely improved my retention.

Oh and the university Wangji attends is Shanghai Jiao Tong University, which is very
prestigious and known especially for its engineering. Is he studying engineering?
Maybe! I can’t seem to settle on specifics.

Big disclaimer, I am not Chinese and grew up in a western country. I have lived in
China and speak a bit of Mandarin, so have tried to base writing off my own
experiences and research but if there’s anything that doesn’t sit right please do let me
know!
 Roller Derby
Chapter Notes

This chapter assumes a basic understanding of the rules of roller derby. If you are new
to the sport, here is a brief intro shamelessly plagiarised from Wikipedia:

“Roller derby is a roller skating contact sport played by two teams on a circular track.

Game play consists of a series of short scrimmages (jams) in which both teams
designate a jammer (who wears a star designation on the helmet) and four blockers to
skate counter-clockwise around a track.

The jammer scores points by lapping members of the opposing team. The teams
attempt to hinder the opposing jammer while assisting their own jammer—in effect,
playing both offense and defense simultaneously.”

See the end of the chapter for more notes

“Hey! Hey, Lan Wangji! Over here!” Luo Qingyang is practically bouncing on her skates in order
to be visible over the crowd. He scans the room, but cannot see Wei Wuxian.

Lan Wangji skirts the edge of the sports hall, left hand in a tightening fist behind his back. He’s
had days to work up to coming here, but the reality is worse than he imagined. Who knew so many
people liked flat track roller derby? The high ceilinged hall reverberates excited voices and the
clattering of wheels on wood, making it hard to think.

“You’re just in time! This is Jiang Yanli and our captain, Wen Qing, they’re the other two
members of our team.”

The two girls greet Wangji, one with a smile that has echoes of Wei Wuxian in its easy warmth.
The captain is leaning on the other girl’s shoulder. Her eyes skirt over him and she gives a small
nod accompanied by a casual handwave. Lan Wangji feels he has just been assessed according to
some unknown rubric. Has he passed?

“Do you want us to explain the rules?” Nie Huaisang asks, while donning a helmet marked with a
large black star.

Lan Wangji shakes his head. He has, of course, looked them up before coming. Huaisang is clearly
the jammer, who will aim to skate ahead of the other team in order to gain points in each round.
Which means the three girls and Wei Wuxian will be in charge of blocking the opposition. They
all seem very professional in their lilac uniforms. Wangji feels a little sorry for the other team, who
are looking grim on the other side of the flat track. They are dressed in bright red and their jammer
appears to be shouting at them.

The roll of skates on the wooden floor gives him a second’s warning of Wei Wuxian’s approach.
Wangji tenses slightly as he brings his hand towards Wangji’s shoulder in greeting, but it only
hovers for a second before lightly tugging on his sleeve. The little show of understanding makes
Wangji’s chest tighten and he nods in greeting.
“What’s the plan of action, captain?” Wei Wuxian asks merrily, while throwing a wink at Wangji.
Wangji presses his lips together and turns to listen to the serious girl called Wen Qing. Her eyes
have narrowed.

“The plan is that we are going to destroy my piece of shit cousin and his girlfriend.” She tightens
her elbow pads and nods to Luo Qingyang, who seems to smile in reply.

"Victory is the best revenge," Luo Qingyang agrees, "and if we get to body slam them a couple of
times, all the better." It seems this is some kind of grudge match. Wei Wuxian nods determinedly,
rolling slightly closer to Wangji who is extremely aware of the hand still brushing his sleeve.

Jiang Yanli buckles on her helmet and asks gently, “Will you try to get ahead in the first round,
Huaisang?”

“My big brother was so happy when I finally joined a contact sport.” Huaisang breaks into a smile.
“Little did he know that my excellence is fuelled by a deep desire to avoid violent contact.” Wangji
can relate to that. “Don’t worry Mianmian, I won’t let them beat us!”

A bell rings out and every head turns towards the flat track. The two teams move to line up side by
side at the starting mark, it seems the match is about to start. Before he skates out, Wei Wuxian’s
hand glides lightly down Wangji’s sleeve. He looks back to Wangji with another wink then turns
and joins his team on the track.

Lan Wangji’s face grows hot but before he can process the interaction, the crowd starts to push
around him towards the track. He dodges until he can get to the back of the hall, and climbs up on
the bench to see better. The bell clangs jarringly again and the skaters surge forward in a blur of
lilac and red uniforms. Nie Huaisang shoots out ahead, closely followed by a girl in scarlet.

She’s not the red team’s jammer but seems intent on getting ahead of him. A flash of lilac appears
and slams into the girl in red, who clatters to the floor. Wangji just manages to glimpse Luo
Qingyang’s toothy smile before the crowd roars in response to the tackle.

His hands fly to cover his ears at the noise and then fumble for his headphones.

Once immersed in their white-noise silence, Wangji presses his back against the wall behind the
bench and looks back to the track. Nie Huaisang is already lapping the red team, skillfully dodging
while the girls protect him.

Wei Wuxian is now at the front of the group, skating backwards with a wicked grin on his face.
The red team’s jammer furiously tries to dodge him without avail. Huaisang has made past the red
team’s defense and tries to skate out in front again to begin a second lap. The red jammer spots
him, and throws himself to the side taking Huaisang down as he falls.

The resultant nine-person pile up stops play. Wangji watches Wei Wuxian skid to a stop and skate
forward, instantly helping his teammate Jiang Yanli to her feet, who seems to be laughing. He then
helps every other member of his team up, checking them for injury.

The next three rounds are just as closely contested. At one point Huaisang is caught up in a knot of
red and it takes the whole team to free him. The opposition jammer pulls ahead, but Wen Qing
slams into his back, sending the red-clad skater sprawling. Huaisang glides past to score another
point in the final round.

The reverberation of the last bell bleeds through Wangji’s headphones. He presses harder against
the wall at his back, balling his fists for extra pressure. He watches Wei Wuxian hug his
teammates and take a final lap of the track. By their raised arms and laughing smiles, it seems they
have won.

Wei Wuxian then skates over to a referee and speaks, gesturing towards the speaker system. The
skater glances up at Lan Wangji with a grin. He realises he has been staring and looks away. His
phone buzzes once in his pocket, his evening study time reminder, and Wangji starts to feel
uncomfortable. He has seen the match, enjoyed it even, but now it's time to go. He opens his map
app to check the quietest route home from the sports hall, knowing he is not in the right headspace
for the bustling intersections of main roads.

He’s about to step down from the bench when he remembers he needs to take evidence for Xichen.
He pulls out his phone, swipes to the camera then taps on the video setting. He holds up the phone
to scan a quick shot of the track when Wei Wuxian skates into the frame.

Lan Wangji stops.

Wei Wuxian has somehow changed back into his own clothes; dark, ripped jeans and a loose black
top. His red skates have been replaced with dark rollerblades, and his helmet is gone. His hair
flutters in a half ponytail. Wei Wuxian spins to a stop in the middle of the room.

And begins to dance.

He moves with such musicality that Wangji finds himself removing his headphones. He gasps as
he recognises the song, one in support of equal marriage, and realises what that might mean about
Wei Wuxian. Feeling a new kinship, his eyes are riveted to Wei Wuxian as he spins across the
track. He bends like bamboo in a breeze, curving with the melody. As the tempo picks up, he tips
onto his front wheels and weaves a pattern across the floor. All the time, a soft smile is playing
across his face.

Enchanted, Lan Wangji only realises he has been holding his breath when the music stops. He
hasn’t moved either, and has filmed the whole thing without intending to. The cheers of the crowd
shock him back into himself and suddenly it is all too, too much. Wangji shuts off his phone and
heads for the exit, he needs to be somewhere quiet.

He’s almost out when a voice calls him.

“Wangji! Wangji-ge! Wait, what did you think?” Wei Wuxian skates in front of him and takes a
triumphant sip from a green glass bottle.

He is too close and Wangji smells the beer on his breath. The audience have started to leave too
and he can hear their hubbub growing nearer. You were perfect, is what he wants to say but with all
the smells and sounds, signals get crossed somewhere.

“Inappropriate.”

Wei Wuxian’s face falls for the first time.

“You shouldn’t drink alcohol while skating.” Wangji tries to clarify, realising his comment might
seem to be about the dance or the theme of the music. Before he can say more, the crowd reaches
them and Lan Wangji has to leave.

-
 Seeking distraction as he walks home, Wangji sends a text to Xichen.

LWJ: New Thing #6 - went to a roller derby.

He hesitates, finger poised to attach the video clip as evidence. For once, his brother doesn’t reply
instantly. Lan Wangji finds himself opening on the video of Wei Wuxian.

Chapter End Notes

Thank you everyone for the lovely comments, every single one made me so happy!

Ah I hope I got the roller derby details alright! They are playing in mixed teams, and
Yanli and Jiang Cheng definitely designed their uniform.

I really wanna write more about the girls and further my YanQing agenda. Also I have
no idea what Wen Chao and his gf did to Luo Qingyang in this AU, it definitely didn’t
involve a branding iron but was probably still a bit shitty and they deserve to be
bodyslammed.

The music WWX danced to is this lovely song about equal marriage by Jolin Tsai:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7hHofDW2ts

Hence Wangji’s flustered realisation and also Wei Wuxian’s reaction to the
‘inappropriate’ response. Wangji is really trying here guys but the sensory
environment is not helping him at all. I hope I struck an okay balance between
showing the challenges of sensory sensitivity but also that autistic folk can find ways
to enjoy things like sports events, even if it’s slightly different from others!

Also, if you like an idea of rollerblade dancing, check out this really talented South
Korean group:
https://youtu.be/4642mT9WNv0
 Social Media
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The narrow, quiet alley is a welcome relief from the towering glass and bustle of Shanghai. The
heat of the city, the evening sun reflecting off windows, the crowds gathered at each crossing, have
all piled on top of each other. The noise of the roller derby is still buzzing under Wangji’s skin.
Almost home. Keep it together. Control yourself.

The familiar scent of the noodle stall filters through his soft, grey facemask. The old aunty who
runs the stall nods to him in greeting. Although all he wants to do is get to his quiet apartment,
Wangji knows he needs to eat. He forces himself to stop, knowing that if he doesn't get food now
he likely won't eat at all.

He is still very much on edge and keeps his headphones on, choosing his food by pointing instead.

The aunty is used to Lan Wangji; he comes here almost every day. She knows not to make his food
spicy. She mimics him by pointing to the stack of fried eggs on the edge of the hot plate instead of
questioning him. Wangji’s mind stumbles over the unexpected decision and he automatically
shakes his head in response to the offer.

The smell is starting to get to him now. Too much, too much.

A moped roars past behind him, too close. The sound of the engine rips through the white noise of
his headphones and sends tension shooting down his spine. Control. Almost home.

Lan Wangji is becoming uncomfortably aware of his clothes against his skin. He hurriedly pulls
out his phone to pay. It unlocks on the video of Wei Wuxian’s dance and he freezes for an instant.
His thoughts are starting to become tangled.

The noodle aunty’s phone appears in his field of vision and Lan Wangji hastily scans the QR code
to pay. He picks up his takeaway bag and leaves.

He really needs to be home. Right now .

He swerves into the courtyard off the side street and takes the concrete stairs two at a time until he
reaches the fifth and final floor. Wangji pushes out of his shoes, not even untying the laces.

Vibrating pressure continues to build inside him, pushing away any coherent thoughts. Almost,
almost.

As soon as the metal door is closed behind him, Lan Wangji drops his takeaway bag on the tiled
floor.

He hurriedly pulls his shirt off, the collar suddenly far too rough on his neck. The feeling of his
long hair shifting against bare skin is unbearable. Too much, too much.

He roughly twists a bun onto the top of his head. He removes the face mask which is starting to
itch and readjusts his headphones.

The tension mounts as he walks quickly on bare feet to the small, windowless shower room.
Finally. Safe.

The tiles are cool on his back as he crouches, pressing himself into the corner of the room. He
presses his lips together against the sounds that are gathering in his throat.

Control it.

Wangji balls his hands into tight fists. He braces his bare feet on the tiles, pushing his back harder
into the corner.

Cold and smooth.

Quiet and dark.

The external pressure gradually releases the buzzing tension inside him. He keeps pressing,
remaining in that posture for as long as he needs. Until he can feel his mind settling. Until the
world begins to feel more manageable.

Relief.

Lan Wangji reminds himself to breathe. He uncurls his fists, shaking the blood flow back into
them. It feels good, light and wavering, and he shakes his hands a little more.

He is back in control.

His phone buzzes in his pocket, time to eat.

Getting up is difficult and it takes him a while to feel ready. Wangji still feels slightly on edge, but
the comfort of routine pulls him to his feet. He walks back through to the front door. Wangji first
gently folds his discarded top, placing it on his bed, then retrieves his food.

He settles on the floor next to the low table and snaps apart a pair of wooden chopsticks. The
noodles have cooled somewhat and the smell is not offensive when he removes the lid. A smile
twitches at the corner of Wangji’s mouth at the kindness of the stall owner. A fried egg sits golden
and crispy on top of the pile of noodles and vegetables.

Two bites into the meal Lan Wangji realises he is actually starving and pulls out his phone. He sets
a timer for 20 minutes and leaves the screen unlocked to force himself to eat slowly. Between
slow, measured bites his eyes rove around his small apartment.

It is a single square room with a tiny shower room. It is painted plain white, with a white tiled
floor. The only furniture is a single bed, the low table he eats and studies at and the cushion he sits
on. His clothes and guqin are tidily stored in a little built-in closet by the door. A single green plant
trails off the counter under the window, where light curtains drift gently in the warm evening
breeze. Unusually for these old concrete blocks, there are no bars on the window.

Uncle and Xichen had not been impressed by the lack of security when they had viewed the room,
but it was the only thing within commuting distance of SJTU that Wangji could afford. It is simple,
clean and utterly his own.

On the days when the world is too much, this is the place where he knows he can manage.

Lan Wangji had lived at home the first year of university, although the commute was immense,
and then moved into the dorms for his second year. He knew it was supposed to be character
building to live with others, and part of him had looked forward to it.

The noisy, dirty reality of sharing a room with three other young men was worse than he had ever
imagined.

Wangji had practically lived in the library that year. He had almost considered sleeping there too
(his roommates did not respect his 9pm bedtime), but there were clear rules against that. When he
had returned home for Spring Festival that year, Xichen and Uncle had taken one look at the dark
rings under his eyes and the tense way he held himself and insisted he move back home.

It had been a relief to fall back into the old routines of home, but Xichen encouraged him to try
moving out again for his third year. That was how the ‘21 New Things Before Turning 21’
challenge (and Xichen’s corresponding 25 Before 25) had begun.

Wangji’s first new thing had been living alone and it had gone so well, he had almost believed the
challenge might be a good thing after all.

A single buzz indicates 20 minutes are up. Wangji lifts the last of the noodles into his mouth and
places the empty container by the door to take out later. Remembering the challenge, Wangji opens
his chat with Xichen.

His brother still hasn’t replied and Lan Wangji finds himself wondering if he should share the
video too. He swipes across to it yet again, it wouldn’t hurt to watch just once more. Wei Wuxian
glides onto the screen, lighting up the track with his smile. Wangji realises with a lurch that the
skater looks directly at the camera multiple times during his dance. Had he been distracted by the
fact he was being recorded without permission? Or had he been looking at Wangji?

Lan Wangji finds himself wanting to hear the music and turns his phone off its default mute
setting. The tinny, echoing noise sends him slamming the mute button back on. Wei Wuxian
moves with so much energy and grace across his screen, and the music was so…

Lan Wangji reaches for his laptop and opens the video editing software which has sat untouched in
a folder of pre-installed applications.

He is quite pleased with the finished video. It had been tough to line up the audio track exactly but
Wei Wuxian now dances in perfect time with a clean recording of Bù Yīyàng Yòu Zěnyàng. Every
time the skater looks into the camera, Wangji’s heart skips a little beat. He is so confident, so full
of life, as he tells the story of the song. He reaches to click the replay button again when a chat
notification appears at the corner of the screen.

LXC: You’re almost catching up with me Wangji, I’d better get my skates on (haha joke)

LXC: How did it go?

Lan Wanji opens the desktop chat app and begins to type ‘it was too noisy’ and then stops himself.
Xichen worried himself sick when Wangji was having a hard time in the dorms, he doesn’t want to
give the wrong impression. The derby was definitely overwhelming but he is glad he went. His
cursor hovers over the ‘attach media’ symbol.

LWJ: [video attached]

LWJ: New Thing #7 - edited a video.

Four minutes later his brother replies.

LXC: Is that your friend? He’s very good. Is that the original song he danced to?

LWJ: Yes and yes.

LXC:

LXC: [hyperlink attached]

LXC: Then I was right, this is him! (I didn’t stalk him, he’s friends with my boxing teacher’s little
brother)

Wanji’s heart beats a little faster as he clicks the hyperlink through to a weibo page. The user icon
is an artistic sketch of someone vaulting a rail in a pair of skates. He reads the name and his mind
freezes for an instant.

Wei Wuxian. 魏无羡.

He remembers where he has seen the name before.

Lan Wangji was top of his class rankings every single term in high school. Since coming to SJTU
the name 魏无羡 has knocked him into second position three times. He’s never seen Wei Wuxian
in class, but it is too much of a coincidence not to be him. Wangji tries to reconcile the mental
image of 魏无羡 (the excellent but mysterious student) with Wei Wuxian (the irreverent, beer-
drinking skater) and fails.

He scrolls down the page, becoming even more intrigued by this unpredictable young man. Almost
immediately a pop-up declares ‘You must be logged in to view this page.’ Wangji pauses. He’s
never had a social media account, the whole concept seems stressful. And yet…

He clicks on the ‘create an account’ button before he can think twice, but then hesitates about a
username. Both Lan Wangji and Wangji are taken, besides it's probably not sensible to use his full
name online. He finally settles on his childhood nickname, Lan Zhan, and discovers that 蓝_湛 is
available. He idly thinks that making an account could counts as New Thing #8.

A few more clicks and his account is made, he hurriedly sets a picture of his guqin as the icon and
then clicks back to Wei Wuxian’s page.

The content is...mixed.

The most recent post is a music link with a quote in English underneath: “Love cannot refuse to
love!”

A user called DocWen has commented underneath with “❤️ ”, which seems very cryptic to
Wangji.

However he does understand the “ “ that a person whos icon looks like Nie Huaisang has used.
Xichen sends him that one regularly.

Wangji clicks to play the song and continues to scroll down.

The next few posts are of Wei Wuxian doing skate jumps in various places that Wangji is quite
sure are both incredibly dangerous and illegal. He scrolls past those quickly.

The next more legal post down is another quote, this time in Chinese: “We all have the right to
protection, and the responsibility to provide it to others. To suggest we do not have this
responsibility, also negates our irrefutable right.”

Wangji starts to blush as he realises that the line is from his own debate speech. He suddenly
remembers the loud whistle that had come from the audience. Had that been Wei Wuxian?

There is only a single, slightly disheartening comment on this post from a user called Sandu⚡ : “
Says the least responsible person ever ”.

Wangji is mildly concerned by this but then a little icon appears at the top of the screen, indicating
Wei Wuxian has made a new post. He scrolls up and his heart judders to a halt.

“ Someone sent me this through a friend of a friend! I can’t believe they took the effort to edit the
music so perfectly Hope I do justice to it!!?”

It's his video.

Lan Wangji thinks he might be sick. What has Xichen done? The video starts to play. He
desperately tries to click away and somehow presses the ‘like’ button in his haste.

Oh no.

Blank with panic, Lan Wangji slams his laptop shut.

His phone buzzes once. It’s 21:00. He collapses onto his bed and stares at the ceiling.

Lan Wangji tries very hard, and utterly fails, to not think about Wei Wuxian. About the easy way
he talks to Wangji, when everyone else seems deterred by his serious exterior. About the way he
laughed and helped his teammates so kindly during the game. About how his fingers felt against
Lan Wangji’s sleeve.

About the fact that Wei Wuxian must know who made that video.
 The eventual embrace of sleep is a welcome relief from his crushing embarrassment.

Chapter End Notes

For anyone who doesn’t know, weibo is a Chinese social media platform! I’d describe
it as something between facebook and tumblr? However I am not very experienced
with social media in general so that may not be the best description...

I hope I did an okay job describing Wangji teetering between sensory overload and
something close to a shutdown/meltdown. It is very much based on my own
experiences and I know everyone experiences things differently! I feel from a young
age he has probably suppressed a lot of his overtly autistic traits, so even being
somewhere private he tends to resort to the least obtrusive of pressure stims.
Repression is definitely not the healthiest response, and is not even an option
sometimes, but I think it fits with his character - what do you think? Please discuss in
the comments!

I also hope the whole thing with Wangji using timers doesn’t seem over the top, I
genuinely have to do this to remember to eat, sleep etc so I identify hard with his
timetabling in canon!!

It varies from place to place, but most Chinese dorms have two sets of bunk beds. Four
people live close together and some folk even cook there (although that is against the
rules)! Loads of people have great memories of those times but for someone who
needs peace and low-sensory input it is not ideal. He shared a dorm with Su She who
just did not get Wangji. Due to miscommunication, he thought Wangji looked down
on him. He will appear later on I think!

I’m sure LQR has a decent-paying job as a teacher or something, but he is basically a
single-parent and you can bet he used his savings to send his nephews to a million
different tutors and cram schools to pass the gaokao. Also, Shanghai rent is insane and
I think Wangji is probably drawn to the ascetic simplicity of his little room. (And just
to be clear, sitting on floor cushions at low tables is not a common thing in modern
China, but I feel like LWJ would appreciate the simplicity of it, and also the whole nd
thing of hating sitting in chairs.)

Did Xichen share the video with Mingjue (and therefore Huaisang) on purpose? Yes.

And the first song (and quote) Wei Wuxian shares is this one by Sodagreen, check it
out: https://youtu.be/hMfInl-v1E4

Also, check out this video of freeskating in Shanghai. You know WWX is going about
jumping off things he shouldn’t be on in the first place!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbH0_xqR26c&t=202s
 Texting
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Four days later, Lan Wangji settles in his usual spot in the back corner of the lecture hall. He keeps
his headphones on as the seats fill up in front of him. He flips open his laptop, cursor hovering over
the tab of Wei Wuxian’s weibo page. He hasn’t dared look again. Should he unlike the video? Or
would that make it even more obvious? This is why I don’t have social media.

Unusually, a student slides onto the end of Wangji’s bench. He is used to having the row to himself
and it unsettles him. He stares fixedly at his computer, opening a fresh document to take notes. In
his peripheral vision, he can see the person sitting about two meters from him. They have put their
feet up on the row in front and are bouncing a pair of worn black boots distractingly.

Inappropriate.

Wangji huffs and opens his textbook to the chapter they are covering today. He tries to concentrate
on typing out the key headings from the text. The boots disappear from the corner of his vision and
are replaced by a tumble of dark hair as the person slouches forward, leaning onto their arms as if
intending to snooze. Lan Wangji gives a short, disapproving glare.

Why bother coming to the lecture if they are just going to sleep?

Finishing his headings, Wangji quickly copies down the recommended reading list then removes
his headphones as the professor walks into the hall. The lecture proceeds as usual. Wangji keeps
his eyes on his screen for the most part, typing notes to help himself concentrate on what is being
said. He only looks up when the lecturer is discussing complex diagrams.

The second time he looks up, he notices the person along the row from him has apparently stopped
napping and is now bent studiously over a sheaf of papers. A long curtain of hair covers the
student’s face. Wangji realises he has become distracted and shifts his gaze back to his screen,
trying to focus on the lecturer’s voice.

Near the end of the lecture, Wangji becomes convinced the student next to him is stealing glances
at him. He slides his eyes sideways, but he only catches the student hidden behind their hair,
distractingly spinning their pen. He watches the student’s long fingers spin the pen for another beat
then blinks. Focus.

His left hand finds the silk ribbon tied into his hair and Wangji lets the pad of his thumb glide over
the smooth fabric. He types one handed for the rest of the lecture and puts his headphones on as
soon as it ends, waiting for the room to empty. The person sitting next to him seems to wait too,
and Wangji keeps his gaze stubbornly averted until they eventually leave.

As he side-steps along the row, Lan Wangji realises the distracting student has left their papers on
the bench.

Irresponsible.

Wangji bends to take the papers in order to recycle them and pauses as his eyes light on the title at
the top of the page. Choice, Freedom and Responsibility within Ancient Chinese Confucianism.

The academic article has been covered in handwritten notes. Some words are circled, passages
underlined and the margins are filled with scrawling comments in messy handwriting.

‘Author’s bias?’ , ‘odd use of “exotic” ’, ‘implying language = concept”.

There are even questions added:

‘How have you formed your own moral code?’

Wangji’s heart beats a little faster. This specific article, the one he recommended, could it be… it
almost feels like the question is addressed to him. The hall is filling up for the next lecture and
Wangji hurries down the steps, absorbed in the comments.

The phrase ‘ conscious and voluntary choice of friendship ’ has been underlined three times. The
article is 23 pages long and Lan Wangji continues to read as he skates home, taking a slow,
circuitous route through back streets to avoid the heavy afternoon traffic. He has almost finished as
he reaches the noodle stall.

The underlined phrase 'human beings can sometimes be tragically torn between two seemingly
incompatible obligations’ haunts Wangji and he considers the question scrawled in the margin
seriously.

‘How would you choose? Between your moral duty and the person you cared most about?’

Lan Wangji realises he isn’t sure. He distractedly nods at the offer of an egg as the old aunty
prepares his usual meal. On his first reading, duty had seemed the obvious answer. However, the
way the commenter has highlighted different aspects of the article, he begins to feel the devastation
of choosing duty over love.

The way this person thinks, we share the same values, but apply them so differently.

He politely accepts the take-away container with a quiet, “Thank you”, and takes the steps quickly
up to his apartment. He pauses to untie his skate shoes and slip into a pair of light blue flip flops,
then steps inside and settles at the little table. There are fewer notes towards the end of the article,
which is slightly disappointing. Wangji flips hastily through the reference pages searching for any
final comments. He has almost given up when he turns over the last page and almost drops it into
his noodles.

On the final page is a drawing. The style is somewhere between clean and sketchy. It has been
done entirely in the same black pen as the notes.

It is a drawing of Lan Wangji.

His hand shakes slightly as he takes in the details of his own upright posture. His long hair has
been drawn in an elegant curve across his back. His ribbon is held between his left thumb and
forefinger. His profile is gently illuminated as he looks seriously at his laptop screen.

This was drawn while he was in class. That student really was looking at him.

That student. This specific article. Wangji’s face begins to heat again and he is very glad no one is
around because he is extremely rattled. His eyes drift from the portrait to a messily written
comment below and he almost drops the paper again.

‘ Lan Zhan,
Thank you for the video and the article recommendation. Take this picture as payment for the
video!

Wei Ying’

It is the same 魏 as Wei Wuxian’s surname and Wangji now has no doubt who was sitting next to
him in class today. Thank goodness Wei Wuxian hadn’t given him the papers in person, Wangji is
sure he would have panicked again and done something rash.

When he reads the final, scrawled line at the bottom of the page, Wangji is sure he would have
done something very embarrassing indeed.

‘Text me 137-4675-1113’

Lan Wangji’s phone buzzes to remind him it is lunch time. He carefully places the drawing on his
table and tries to eat. His chopsticks shake a little.

He gave me his number.

Wangji tries to rationalise and calm his nerves.

He very likely only wants to continue the discussion of philosophy. He smiles at everyone, he was
very friendly with his team mates too. He probably gives his number to lots of people, it doesn’t
mean he likes me. The drawing was just a repayment. He only called me Lan Zhan to tease me
about the weibo post.

As much as he tries to reason, Lan Wangji’s mind keeps returning to the soft brush of fingers
against his sleeve.

It becomes too much and Wangji breaks his own rule of not interrupting meals. He unlocks his
phone and types in the number, triple-checking it is correct.

He tries to compose an appropriate reply, but Lan Wangji rarely texts anyone other than his
brother. He settles on imitating the format of the note.

LWJ: Wei Ying,

LWJ: Thank you for the drawing, and for the annotations.

LWJ: How may I repay you for the analysis you wrote?

LWJ: Lan Zhan.

The texts send, irretrievable, and Wangji finds himself panicking slightly. Was that an appropriate
response? He firmly locks his phone and places it facedown on the table.
 He looks again at the delicate details of the sketch in front of him. A smile blooms across his right
cheek.

New Thing #9 - Texted Wei Ying.

Chapter End Notes

At least the sketch gifting went a little better than in canon! WWX must have it bad
for him to attend an early morning lecture, hopefully it will pay off!!

Does anyone else find texting and social media rather intimidating, particularly to
initiate? What are the scripts?! What are the rules?! Well done LWJ for giving it a
go!!

Thank you everyone for the lovely comments, they've made my week! The story will
continue to update 2 chapters every week until completion!
 Roller Blading
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Wei Ying has texted back.

It is enough to propel Lan Wangji out of any lingering 5 am sleepiness. He sits bolt upright in bed,
hastily snoozing his alarm and swiping open the text message.

WY: repayment?

WY: hmm that’s a tough one, i did put a lot of effort into that critique...

WY: next time you can suggest something shorter… and meet me at the skatepark today?

Today!?

Wangji checks the time the texts were sent. 2 am this morning. His mind boggles. Had Wei Ying
stayed awake until then? Or woken up at that time? Both options concern him.

He presses his lips together, mentally running through acceptable responses before typing.

LZ: I greatly appreciated your effort. I will attempt to find a more concise article for you.

LZ: I am at the skatepark between 08:30 and 09:30 every weekday.

Wangji hesitates, then types a final line.

LZ: I will see you there today.

He starts to calculate. It is now almost 05:15 and he will need to leave at least 30 minutes for travel
in order to arrive for 08:30. That gives him 2:45 hours to get ready and select an appropriate article
to discuss. Should he print out a copy at the library for them to read?

He is visited by the mental image of himself and Wei Ying leaning together over a paper.

Their heads are close together as they discuss a troubling line. Wei Ying raises a hand to indicate
a word and brushes Wangji’s wrist in the process.

Lan Wangji has to lie back down.

No printing. He doesn’t think he could handle it.

His snoozed alarm buzzes again. Wangji pushes himself out of bed and begins his morning
stretches. After showering, he very resolutely does not think about what to wear to meet Wei Ying.
He simply steps into the wide-legged jade blue trousers he had laid out the night before, tucking in
a white linen top with a simple band collar.

Then he catches his reflection in the frosted glass of the shower room door. He looks like he is
going to an interview. Or a funeral.

The white shirt comes off and Wangji slides open his closet. Ridiculous. He wears that shirt every
week, why is he feeling self-conscious about it now? After much deliberation he finally settles on
something. A soft, cropped top the same colour as his hair ribbon. Xichen had complimented him
on that combination last time they were home for dinner.

He then carefully avoids looking at the glass door and sits down to open his laptop. How could it
possibly already be 06:30? He clicks open his folder of downloaded articles and navigates to the
philosophy section. There are a substantial number and he quickly sifts out any that are over 20
pages long. An article on the balance of internal righteousness with what society deems to be
appropriate snags Wangji’s attention.

As he skims through it, the comforting familiarity of Kong Zi’s Analects help to calm his nerves.
His mouth quirks slightly thinking about how Wei Ying might respond to the concept of shame
being the factor that ‘restrains one from doing something that he is not supposed to do.’

He starts to add electronic notes, trying to mimic the conversational style Wei Ying used. He
becomes absorbed in the intellectual threads of the article and does not notice the time until his
08:00 alarm buzzes. Where did the time go?

Lan Wangji hastily packs his back, beginning to feel anxious that he will be late for their meeting,
and picks up his skateboard.

Wei Ying is not there at 08:30. Nor is he there at 08:45. Or 09:00.

Yesterday’s seminar recording has finished and he removes his earbuds. Wangji looks up again to
scan the skate park. A small group of students has gathered at the other end near the larger drops,
but the place is otherwise deserted.

He restrains himself from checking his phone again; it only makes time go faster. One more round
of the park, same route as always. One more and he will be here.

Wangji lines up at the end of the smallest drop in the park and begins winding his way through the
concrete ramps and metal rails. He successfully clears the three-step jump, which has been eluding
him for the past two weeks. Starting to gather momentum, Wangji pushes himself up the ramp
towards the largest drop in the park.

And skids to a halt.

He barely manages to stop in time and the shock elevates his heart rate.

Three students are sitting at the bottom of the drop, drinking from cans. They had been gathered
watching something on a phone, but turn at the scrape of Wangji’s board. Their faces are
unreadable in a way that is unsettling. Lan Wangji doesn’t move, one foot still resting on his
skateboard.

“Ignore him.” Says one of the young men. Wangji knows they have met before but he struggles to
identify his face.

“You know him?” Another student responds. They are talking as if Lan Wangji isn’t there. He
tightens his right fist.

“He’s the stuck up one I told you about. Too good for the dorms, wouldn’t even eat in the same
room as us.” It’s Su Minshan, Wangji’s old roommate. He closes his other fist.

“I remember. What was it you guys called him? Oh yeah,” The third student scoffs and makes a
dismissive hand gesture. “Run along, Little Prince.”

“I’m skating.” The students don’t even have skates or boards with them. They shouldn’t be here.
Wangji wants to tell them this, but tries to refrain from quoting the campus rules. That hadn’t gone
down well in the dorms.

“Yeah, well skate along then.” The students laugh and turn their backs on him. Wangji begins to
feel a little unbalanced. He can’t complete his circuit without doing this drop. He needs to
complete the circuit properly.

“I skate this route every weekday. ”

One of the young men turns back sharply with a huff. “It doesn’t mean you own the place though,
does it?”

Wangji isn’t sure what owning the park has to do with them moving. “The University owns this
park. It is for students to skate in, you aren’t allowed to sit there.”

The students are suddenly getting to their feet and Su Minshan's brows are drawn. “I am so sick of
you telling me what to do. And I am absolutely tired of you looking down on me!

The raised voice cues Wangji into the fact that Su Minshan is getting angry and he tries to reflect
on what he has done wrong. He realises that standing above the students might have appeared
overly confrontational and it may indeed have been tiring for them to continuously look up at him.
He picks up his skateboard, places one hand on the edge of the drop and carefully steps down to
where they stand.

The students laugh but if anything, they seem angrier. Wangji realises he has made a mistake. Su
Minshan had not literally meant ‘look down’.

“A real comedian, this one.” Says one of the students, throwing his can at Wangji’s feet. The sharp
sound of tin on concrete almost makes him flinch and suddenly everything feels a lot more
dangerous. “Is my friend a joke to you?”

Wangji’s mind is starting to get stuck and he can’t formulate a response fast enough. They step
closer and that makes it worse. The one who threw the can is closest of all. He raises a hand
towards Wangji’s chest.

“I asked you a question, Little Prin-”

Lan Wangji slaps away the hand before it can push him. His skin is crawling.
“Do not touch me.”

He bites out the reply, starting to feel desperate. His back is to the concrete drop and the students
have him surrounded. He grips his skateboard like a shield. Control.

The student who Wangji just hit has raised his hand higher. His eyes are wide. He looks dangerous.

“I’ll do exactly what I wan-”

There is a scrape of wheels on concrete and a dark shape flies past Lan Wangji’s shoulder.

The shape canons into the three students, knocking them flat on the ground.

Before Wangji can catch a breath, the shape morphs into a person in a black hoodie and dark roller
blades. The person pushes themself onto one knee and turns around.

It is Wei Ying, with the widest grin splitting his face.

“Just in time is better than too early, right?”

Lan Wangji is speechless in the face of the radiant person who literally just flew to his rescue.
Before he can order his mind a shout echoes across the park.

“Hey! You! I saw that!”

Wei Ying and Lan Wangji turn their heads. A short, middle-aged man in the uniform of campus
security is hurrying towards them. Wei Ying scrambles to his feet. He shoots Wangji a wink.

“Time to go!”

The relief of being able to leave the situation gives Lan Wangji enough presence of mind to drop
his skateboard and step onto it before Wei Ying grabs his sleeve. The rollerblader pushes hard, and
they are suddenly shooting across the park. Wangji glances back. The security guard is still puffing
after them.

“Lan Zhan, watch out!”

He snaps his head around. They are headed straight towards the five-step jump. Wangji adjusts his
position and manages a nod to Wei Ying who lets go of his sleeve. Lan Wangji pushes off the
ground twice to gain extra speed. He doesn’t have time to consider whether he can make it when
suddenly they are in the air. Wei Ying lets out a whoop, his arms raised.

They are flying.

Wangji’s stomach drops as they hurtle towards the ground. He feels the wheels swerve slightly but
he keeps his balance as they hit the concrete.

“This way, this way!” Wei Ying pushes off in front and Wangji angles his board to follow him out
the side entrance of the park. Wei Ying vaults the fence and Wangji weaves between the gates,
pushing off again to catch up. His heart rate is elevated again but this time it feels incredible.
Thoughts of how many rules he has just broken flutter behind him in the wind like dandelion seeds.

He follows Wei Ying along the paved paths of campus, weaving between groups of students, until
they reach a wooded path that leads into a deserted public park. Finally, Wei Ying rolls to a stop
and turns to him with a breathless laugh. He leans his hands on his knees to catch his breath and
Wangji notices there is a large rip in his jeans.
“Lan Zhan, I hope you appreciate that this is the earliest I’ve been out of bed all month.” He huffs
another breath and glances up with shining eyes. “This much excitement can’t be natural before
midday.”

Wangji manages to hold Wei Ying’s gaze for a beat, then looks away. Despite the exhilarating
ride, he still feels very much off balance from the stress of the encounter in the skatepark. Without
the movement of skating and reassuring pressure of the wind, he begins to feel his facade
crumbling.

“Eh? Lan Zhan, is something wrong? Did they hurt you?”

It takes him a minute to process the questions, then he shakes his head. He can’t quite bring
himself to make eye contact again, not yet.

“Good, good.” Wei Ying throws himself onto a park bench with a sigh. Wangji sits at the other end
of the bench, eyes still lowered. His gaze slides across to regard Wei Ying and his eyes widen
slightly when he sees that beneath the ripped jeans is a patch of bloody, grazed skin.

He pulls out his phone, not yet ready to speak.

LZ: You are injured.

Wei Ying’s phone plays a little musical trill. He glances over to Wangji for a second, opens his
mouth as if to speak, and then unlocks his phone.

WY: A few battle scars won’t harm me! Let them be a reminder of my heroic deed

Wangji isn’t sure how to reply to this, so he doesn’t type anything. He feels like his mind has been
left behind somewhere in their mad dash.

WY: Besides ripped jeans are part of my aesthetic

WY: People would pay good money for this look, genuine blood and everything

He isn’t quite sure if Wei Ying is now writing utter nonsense, or if it just feels a lot like it. The
effort of trying to keep up is spreading tension through his body. He swipes out of the chat app and
opens his cloud storage.

LZ: [document attached]

LZ: Read first, talk after.

Wangji slides his eyes sideways again to watch as Wei Ying opens the article he has shared. His
mouth has fallen open.

“Lan Zhan! This is fourteen pages long!”

He remains silent, watching as Wei Ying huffs and throws a leg up on the bench. Content that he
is reading, Lan Wangji allows his eyes to close and breathes calmness back into himself.

The next time he opens his eyes Wei Ying has shifted position. He is on his back, legs swinging
over the armrest of the bench, his phone held high over his head, thumbs tapping on the screen. He
cannot tell if Wei Ying is still reading the article. Wangji closes his eyes, still needing some time to
recover.

When he is close to being himself again, a shuffling noise brings Wangji back to the present. Wei
Ying is now sitting cross-legged, still on his phone. His left hand is effortlessly twirling a twig. He
is chewing on his lip. Wangji watches for a beat and then finds his cheeks growing warm.
Inappropriate . He shouldn’t be staring. He tries to focus and find his words.

“I can speak now.”

Wei Ying leaps to his feet and spins to face Lan Wangji with a lopsided smile.

“Check your phone.”

Confused, he unlocks his phone and taps on the new message from Wei Ying. It is a photo, slightly
blurred but instantly recognisable. Wangji’s eyes widen in surprise.

In the foreground of the photo is Wei Ying’s face, his mouth open in a triumphant yell. Behind his
shoulder is Lan Wangji himself, expression tense. His posture is slightly crouched. They are both
midair, flying off the five-step jump in the skate park. In the very distant left hand corner is the
red-faced security guard running after them.

“Shameless.”

Wangji can’t quite believe Wei Ying managed to take this photo as they fled. Then he thinks back
to the videos of illegal-looking skate stunts on Wei Ying’s weibo page and realises this is likely not
his first such escapade. First.

“May I send this photo to my brother?” Wangji surprises himself and apparently Wei Ying too,
who bursts into laughter.

“Yes! Absolutely! But...why?”

Wangji is silent for a second as he sends a ‘New Thing #10 - Chased by a security guard’ text to
Xichen.

“I have to do 21 new things before my birthday, I promised him.”

“Oh yeah? How many have you got so far?” Wei Ying tips forward and back on his roller blades,
head tilted with interest.

Wangji swipes back to his cloud storage app and opens a different document. He types a single line
then hands over his phone before he loses his nerve:
Lan Wangji’s List of 21 Things Done Before Turning 21

1. Lived alone

2. Switched to paperless note-taking

3. Learned to skateboard

4. Competed in a debate

5. Made a friend

6. Went to a roller derby

7. Edited a video

8. Made a social media account

9. Texted Wei Ying

10. Chased by a security guard

11.

He watches Wei Ying’s eyes dart over his screen, eyebrows rising higher with each line. Lan
Wangji suddenly becomes acutely aware of how many items on the list are related to Wei Ying.
He hastily takes his phone back, filled with regret.

“Wanna make it eleven?”

Lan Wangji’s face freezes in confusion, until he realises his friend is suggesting he try yet another
new thing. He is beginning to automatically reject the unexpected offer when Wei Ying spins on
his blades and sits down. Right next to him.

Their shoulders brush. He can feel the warmth of Wei Ying through his clothes.

Lan Wangji draws in a breath.

Their faces are so near. Wei Ying’s mouth is slightly open.

“Do you wanna…”

Yes, he thinks emphatically, all other thoughts lost in this heart-pounding closeness.

“... try rollerblading?!”

The words slam into Lan Wangji like a truck. He fixes Wei Ying with his blankest expression.

“I don’t rollerblade.”
“A cultivated person is not invariably for or against anything.” Wei Ying winks once and begins
to unbuckle his blades.

It takes a beat for Wangji to recognise the quote. “You finished the article?”

“If I say yes, will you try rollerblading?”

Wangji huffs.

He searches his memory but cannot immediately provide anything to counter the Kong Zi quote.

“Shameless.”

Admitting defeat, he leans forward and undoes the double knots in his laces.

The rollerblades fit him well enough. They are still warm when he puts them on. When he has
finished buckling them, he puts one hand on the bench and pushes into standing. He balances
precariously, feeling extremely unsafe. He takes two staggering steps, wobbling like a newborn
calf.

“See! I knew you’d be-”

The world tips and the ground slams into Wangji’s back. Bubbling laughter fills the air and Wei
Ying’s face appears above him.

“Pfft- Lan Zhan….” Wei Ying’s face attempts to contort into concern but cracks into merriment
again. “I can’t believe I just witnessed…..ahahah….. the elegant Lan Wangji…..ohohHO… totally
wipe out!”

Elegant? Wangji thinks dazedly. Is that how he sees me? He pushes into sitting and pulls himself
back onto the bench, rollerblades skittering under him embarrassingly.

“Ridiculous.” He is blushing and looks away to cover it. He thinks I’m elegant.

“Eh it wasn’t that bad, you should have seen me the first time I put a pair of skates on!” Wei Ying
steps in front of the bench. “Ready to try again?”

Lan Wangji regards the pair of hands that are gently extended towards him, open-palmed and
encouraging.

I don’t touch strangers, he almost automatically responds and then remembers that Wei Ying had
said they were friends.

He looks up at Wei Ying, suddenly feeling both vulnerable and safe. Wei Ying doesn’t move,
doesn’t force him. He, for once, is still.

Wei Ying gives the power of the situation to him.

Tentatively, Lan Zhan raises his hands. Their fingertips brush and a thrill runs under his skin. Wei
Ying keeps his hands still, letting Lan Zhan take control. The buzzing under his skin is different, so
different, from how he usually feels when someone tries to touch him.

This time, trust cushions the feeling into something kinder, softer. He slides his palms into Wei
Ying’s, wrapping his fingers around his wrists. They fit like their hands were made to be together.

Wei Ying raises his eyebrows, and Lan Zhan nods gently. Then he is being pulled to his feet,
unsteady but safe. Wei Ying rubs his thumb over his wrist and Lan Zhan tries to relax into his
support.

Wei Ying steps backwards and Lan Zhan rolls gently towards him. He is rollerblading. Eyes glued
to the path, a little smile lights his lips as Wei Ying gently squeezes his wrists.

“Don’t let go.”

“See I knew you could do it, all you needed was my impeccable teaching method.”

“Ridiculous!”

“Oh ridiculous am I? Then I guess you don’t need my hand anymo-”

“Wei Ying!”

“I’m teasing, I’m teasing! Of course I won’t let you go Lan Zhan, do you trust me?”

“...”

“Lan Zhan, I’m hurt!”

“I trust you.”

Wei Ying’s laughter bubbles out of the video recording. In the seclusion of his own room, Lan
Wangji lets a half-smile lift his cheek. He watches himself grip with barely disguised desperation
to Wei Ying’s hand as he skates on unsteady legs. Wei Ying is filming him with his other hand and
the video shakes as he laughs.

He sends the video without explanation to his brother, somehow feeling both desperate and reticent
to share that wonderful morning.

LWJ: New Thing #11 - Learned to rollerblade.

LWJ: [video attached]

He thinks, but does not type, New Thing #12 - Held hands with Wei Ying.

His alarm buzzes to signal it is time to sleep.

He presses play once more.

Chapter End Notes

Wei Ying skated at top speed the whole way to the skate park, he only woke up at
09:00!!

Who is the unnecessarily confrontational friend of Su Minshan? Xue Yang? I’m not
sure, but he won’t feature again because this is a happy fic so don’t worry!! All of Wei
Ying’s ripped clothes are genuinely ripped by daring escapades, he doesn’t buy them
like that.

For anyone who is concerned, there was no lecture that morning so Lan Zhan didn’t
miss class because that would have definitely unsettled him. Also I feel in this modern
setting, Lan Zhan is perhaps less good at dealing with confrontation (because he
cannot draw a sword or fly away), but marginally better at dealing with
communication and feelings.

In terms of LWJ’s touch sensitivity, I hope it is clear that it doesn’t magically

disappear when he is with WWX. The difference is that he is in control and that he
feels safe. Some folk’s sensitivity doesn’t change at all, and other people like Lan
Zhan are affected by the person and the environment and his own mindset. I’m sure
there are times when he doesn’t even want Xichen or Wei Ying to touch him, and
that’s okay!

For anyone who is as interested in Chinese philosophy as myself, the article is Yi:
Practical Wisdom in Confucious’ Analects (Yu, 2006). (Kong Zi is the name of the
philosopher we call Confucious in English). There are a whole load of concepts that
feel really relevant to LWJ and WWX discussed.
And here is a link to the full text for download:
https://booksc.xyz/book/9875357/9ef1bc

I would highly recommend reading an annotated version of The Analects if you want
to learn more about Chinese Philosophy. I like this version myself, as the annotations
feel very balanced and informative:https://b-ok.xyz./book/4188672/e56043

I feel like LWJ might cling to the advice from The Analects in the way he does to the
Lan rules in canon, it is very comforting to have a set of rules and advice to help
nagivate the world.

Kongzi scholars please don't come for me, I took a bit of liberty with the translation of
junzi as 'cultivated person' because I thought it fit well. It has been variously translated
as gentleman (unnecessarily gendered), excellent person or educated person.

Xichen is absolutely losing his mind at today’s texts and is loving every minute of it!!
He might actually send WWX some flowers or a fruit basket if he keeps this up.
 First Aid
Chapter Notes

These two chapters demanded to be written, hence the delayed update and the
extended number of chapters overall!

Additionally, I wanted to let everyone know that this fic is going to be kind and
affirming throughout. There are all sorts of stressful things in the world and I'm not
going add to them! So there will be no homophobia, violence, ableism nor other
painful things in that vein!

Thank you to every person who commented in any way, you put a smile on my face
every time!! If anyone wants to interact, share their thoughts, art, ideas, anything...i'm
on tumblr @campanulaflora :)

This is the song I listened to while writing this chapter: https://youtu.be/vnvBx7xKaiI

edit: just came back to tidy up some spelling!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Lan Zhan skates up the wooded path leading to the skatepark, gliding in and out of the chill of
morning’s shadows. For the first time since the confrontation, Lan Zhan arrives at the skatepark at
08:30.

He'd practised in the courtyard outside of his apartment instead for a week. A whole week. It
should be enough time to recover from the stress of that encounter, and yet his chest feels tight as
he approaches the gate.

He can see a few figures through the trees, a little too far away to recognise. Lan Zhan shifts his
weight over the tail of his board, grinding to a stop. Ready to turn around at the first sign of those
students from the week before, he removes his headphones.

“Ughhhhhh…”

“Wei Wuxian! Get up!”

“Five more minutes, just five.”

Lan Zhan’s chest tightens again. He pushes off, winding between the gates into the skatepark. Wei
Ying is lying on his back, dark denim jacket pulled over his head like a shroud. He is surrounded
by three of his roller derby teammates.

“Dude, it was your idea to-” Nie Huaisang stops speaking as he looks up and sees Lan Zhan.
“Ohhhh.”

Luo Qingyang’s mouth falls open for an instant then tips into a small smile. She energetically
shakes Wei Ying’s shoulder.

“Hmmfph?” Wei Ying lifts his jacket and sits up, blinking blearily. “Lan Zhan!”
The wheels of his rollerskates scrabble as he stands up.

Lan Zhan does not move, still adjusting to the unexpected presence of others in the park. He runs
the pad of his thumb along the silk lining of his sleeve cuff.

Wei Ying skates over to him with a smile, jacket thrown over one shoulder, “Fancy seeing you
here!”

Sometimes Lan Zhan worries about Wei Ying’s recall, he really must encourage him to improve
his sleep routine.

“Why is your memory so poor?”

“Huh?” Wei Ying’s wheels scrape to a stop on the concrete.

“We discussed my plan to return to the skatepark today.”

“Oh, huh, really?” Wei Ying shifts, looking back over his shoulder with an awkward laugh.
“When- when was that?”

“Yesterday. Via text.”

Wei Ying’s face is growing slightly red, perhaps he is embarrassed about his poor memory.

Another scrape of wheels and Wen Qing rolls up beside Wei Ying, throwing her arm around his
shoulders. She is grinning.

“Now that we all know why we are really here, shall we actually practice? Or did you make me
wake up early just for moral support?”

Lan Zhan takes a beat, thumb gliding over the cloth of his sleeve again. They are here to train and
I am distracting Wei Ying.

“I will allow you to practice. Please forgive my intrusion.”

He turns to put in his earbuds but Wei Ying stops him with a gentle hand on his upper arm.

“Lan Zhan, will you skate with me after practice?”

The invitation is unexpected and Lan Zhan doesn’t have a response ready. He tenses slightly
thinking about the timing of his morning lecture. Wei Ying’s head tilts and his eyebrows draw
together. Lan Zhan’s thumb glides over the fabric of his sleeve, once, twice and a third time.

“I must leave at 09:30.”

Wei Ying smiles, his hand sliding down Lan Zhan’s arm.

“I’ll be done before then, I promise!” He holds up three fingers, smiles even wider and spins
around, speeding over to his teammates.

Lan Zhan blinks. Follow your routine. He reorientates himself and looks down to cue up
yesterday’s recording.

-
Lan Zhan has completed his planned route of the park three times. When he checks his phone, he
realises he has skated slightly faster than usual. It is 09:20. Lan Zhan slides to a stop at the edge of
the park and removes his earbuds.

“Why is it always meeee?”

He turns to see Nie Huaisang skating desperately across the middle of the park. He is being
pursued by Wei Ying. Wen Qing and Luo Qingyang are blocking his way.

“You’re the jammer, Huaisang!” Shouts his captain as she lunges at him, “If you’d rather be a
blocker, you just have to say.”

"That sounds even worse! Ayiie!"

Nie Huaisang yelps as he dodges another tackle from Luo Qingyang. She only just misses him,
loses balance and skidding across the concrete on her wrist guards. Lan Zhan steps off his board,
worried that she is injured but Luo Qingyang is already upright and sprinting to catch up with the
others.

The jammer has pulled ahead slightly and takes the opportunity to make a sharp turn. He sees Lan
Zhan watching and speeds towards him.

“Lan Wangji, protect me!”

Before he can react, Nie Huaisang has hidden himself behind Lan Zhan. The others pull up short,
panting.

Wei Ying leans on his knees and smiles up at Lan Zhan, his hair has fallen out of its tie and hangs
around his face. He blows away a loose strand of hair and winks.

Lan Zhan stands stiffly, face heating up and looks away quickly.

“Alright, well done guys, that’s enough for today.” Wen Qing unbuckles her helmet and nods at
her team. “Unlike some people, I actually need to attend my classes if I want to pass. See you all
next week.”

The others say goodbye and Lan Zhan nods to her before Wen Qing turns and skates across to the
south entrance to the skate park. He likes the derby team captain, she is dedicated and straight
forward.

“Oh shit, her packed lunch from Yanli!” Wei Ying speeds over to the fence where their bags are
stacked and pulls out a metal lunchbox. He zooms away, shouting over his shoulder, “Wait for me
Lan Zhan, I’ll be back soon!”

There is a beat of silence filtered with the sound of traffic. Luo Qingyang and Nie Huaisang share
an unreadable look. Lan Zhan waits, watching for Wei Ying’s return.

“So, it seems we have you to thank for our last-minute morning practice!” Luo Qingyang smiles,
raising her eyebrows.

Lan Zhan does not quite follow. Nevertheless, he feels he must respond, “I apologise for any
inconvenience.”
“We’re definitely not complaining!” Nie Huaisang explains, pulling a small electric fan from the
bag around his waist. “It’s been enlightening.”

There is an edge of something in this conversation that Lan Zhan can’t quite catch. He nods to
show he has heard and continues to look into the distance, scanning for Wei Ying.

“Well, I really need to go shower. Mianmian you need to leave too, right?” Huaisang says, voice
blurring through the blades of his fan.

“Hmm? Oh! Oh yeah, we’d better get going.” Luo Qingyang says. “Wangji, see you at Debate
Society tomorrow?”

There is still no sign of Wei Ying and Lan Zhan slides his eyes over to his debate teammates. He
nods again, starting to feel tense about timings.

Qingyang’s smile crinkles up the corners of her eyes and she nods back. They both turn and skate
away with a wave, “See you then!”

Lan Zhan moves over to where his and Wei Ying’s bags lie side by side. He checks his phone.
09:25. The limited time runs a rod of tension down Lan Zhan’s spine. He lifts his bag onto his
shoulder and picks up his skateboard, ready to leave. He waits, tensing one hand then the other
repeatedly, counting. Left, right, left, right-

09:26.

Left, right, left, right-

“I’m here! I’m here!”

Lan Zhan turns towards the voice. Wei Ying is skating at top speed along the outside of the skate
park, heading straight for the green-painted boundary fence. Lan Zhan watches wide-eyed as Wei
Ying kicks off the ground and lifts into the air to hurdle the metal fence.

For an instant Wei Ying flies through the air, shirt billowing out behind him, a smile as wide as his
face, his eyes on Lan Zhan.

The next moment, Wei Ying is face down on the ground.

Lan Zhan drops his board and runs, falling to his knees on the concrete.

“Wei Ying!”

His hands hover, shaking slightly. There is a muffled groan then Wei Ying rolls over.

“Wei Ying?”

“I’m okay, I’m okay. I forgot I wasn’t wearing my blades.” Wei Ying tries to put his right hand on
the ground to push himself up and hisses. He raises his hand to look at it and Lan Zhan sees blood.

“You’re hurt.” Lan Zhan’s brows draw together, his hands still hovering.

“I’m fine.” Wei Ying pulls the sleeve of his top over his right hand with a smile. “I’m used to it, I
fall all the time.”

“You’re hurt!” Lan Zhan repeats, frustration rising his voice slightly.
Lan Zhan digs into his bag for the small first aid kit his uncle had given him. He pops open the
box and places it on the concrete.

Wei Ying leans away, still covering his injured hand.

“Lan Zha-”

“You’re hurt, let me help you!”

Wei Ying flinches back slightly and Lan Zhan realises his tone has risen sharply along with his
concern. He doesn’t understand why Wei Ying is trying to hide his injury, it frustrates him. He
takes a moment to settle his nerves and adjust his voice.

Lan Zhan holds out his own hand, palm up.

“Please let me help you.”

Wei Ying's expression is hard to read, he seems wary and Lan Zhan does not move, giving him
time. Wordlessly, Wei Ying shifts his weight and holds out his hand.

Lan Zhan carefully slides back Wei Ying’s sleeve, revealing a deep graze across his palm, just
below his thumb.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?” Lan Zhan keeps his eyes down, trying to reduce any feeling of
confrontation. From his peripheral vision he sees Wei Ying shake his head.

Lan Zhan nods in response. “We should clean the wound and apply a dressing.” He pauses. “Will
you allow me to do so?”

This time, Wei Ying nods, still holding his hand out.

Lan Zhan looks down at his first aid box. He has never done this before, but his uncle gave him a
first aid book when he moved out. He read it enough times to memorise the principles and
mentally rehearse the correct action to take in different scenarios. He follows the script he
remembers from the book as much to steady himself as for Wei Ying.

“First we must clean the wound, running water is ideal but a sterile wipe is acceptable.” He gently
cradles Wei Ying’s fingers in his left hand and raises the alcohol wipe. He looks up, waiting for
permission.

Wei Ying nods again and Lan Zhan gently starts to wipe the wound in the direction of the graze. It
draws a slight intake of breath from Wei Ying but he does not flinch.

“Now that the wound is clean, we ought to dry it with gauze. However we do not have gauze, so
we will apply a dressing. To fit it to your hand, I will cut two triangles from opposing edges.”

The 09.30 alarm buzzes once in his pocket but Lan Zhan ignores it and continues to narrate. Wei
Ying keeps completely still, his hand growing warm in Lan Zhan’s as Lan Zhan carefully applies
the dressing. When he is finished, Lan Zhan finds that he does not want to let go.

“Keep the first aid kit. When you have time, wash the wound with warm water and apply a new
dressing. If you experience intense redness or swelling then it may have become infected, however
some itchiness is a normal part of the healing process.”

Lan Zhan finally runs out of script, he continues to cradle Wei Ying’s hand, feeling the warmth
 between them. Wei Ying’s fingers flex slightly and Lan Zhan looks up at him.

Wei Ying is blinking quickly and under his eyes is tinged pink. For a moment, Lan Zhan worries
that he is still in pain but then a smile grows across his face.

“La-”

Wei Ying is interrupted by the second buzz of Lan Zhan’s alarm and he has to withdraw his hand to
turn it off. He tenses as he looks at the screen; 09:33.

“I’m making you late.”

Lan Zhan doesn’t reply right away. Part of him doesn’t want to leave, but he will only make it to
class in time if he leaves now. Wei Ying gently pushes his shoulder.

“I promise I’m okay now. Go, before you’re late for class.”

Lan Zhan stands up reluctantly. His hand feels empty without Wei Ying’s. He picks up his board
and debates how to say goodbye when Wei Ying does it for him.

“Thank you, Lan Zhan! I promise to text you for further instructions if I show signs of infection!”

Lan Zhan looks over his shoulder, nods, and walks quickly to class.

Chapter End Notes

Yes, Wei Ying absolutely made his entire team get up early just to be there for Lan
Zhan because he knew he was nervous about going back to the skatepark. Yes, he was
too embarrassed to tell anyone. And, yes, everyone has now confirmed beyond doubt
that he has a massive, massive crush!

Yanli wasn't at the practice because she is working. I feel like she works in a children's
hospital as a play leader, which is where she met Wen Qing while she was on a
medical placement! Yanli is absolutely the type of person who would pack cute
lunchboxes with vegetables cut into different shapes.

I'm sad that Wen Ning isn't in this fic, but he must be in his final year of high school
and probably doesn't have to do anything but study and sleep. I'm cheering for you
Wen Ning!

Wei Ying wasn't scared of Lan Zhan or anything here, its just that I think Wei Ying
isn't used to people helping him (besides Yanli who is a very special exception) and
really struggles to show any weakness and ask for help. I think he's used to being
scolded for his mistakes, not taken care of. Once he figured out that Lan Zhan wasn't
mad at him, he was very, very touched!
 Photography
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Lan Zhan hesitates, then sends the text.

LZ: How is your hand now?

He is about to lock his screen when a typing bubble appears.

WY: I’m fine you old fusspot

WY: I even changed the dressing after my shower today

WY: [picture attached]

WY: See? Although I didn’t do as good a job as Dr Lan Wangji

LZ: I’m not a medical student

LZ: If you have any other symptoms it is best to talk to Wen Qing

WY: But I only want Dr Lan to look after me

LZ: I am sorry I am not adequately qualified to do so

WY: Thats okay you can make it to me

LZ: How?

WY: I sent you a photo! Send me one back

WY: Of you
Lan Zhan’s face heats up. He has never taken a photo of himself before. In general, he hates photos
because they seem to require expressions that don’t feel right on his face. He is trying to compose
a reply when two people walk into the empty study room booked for Debate Society practice.

“Oooh, who are you texting?” Nie Huaisang hurries over and sits next to him.

Lan Zhan hastily locks his phone and puts it face down on the table.

“He’s blushing, so it must be…” Luo Qingyang takes the other seat with a grin.

Lan Zhan looks down and swallows, “Wei Ying.”

His debate teammates both exclaim loudly, Nie Huaisang drums on the table. They have done this
every day they have seen Lan Zhan this past week. At first Lan Zhan was worried they were
making fun of him. However, they have helped him with composing replies twice now and have
never said anything that made him feel bad about himself.

“What’s he said this time?” Qingyang leans in slightly, but keeps a comfortable distance between
them.

“ He asked for a photo. Of me.”

“Oooohhhh.” Both his teammates respond and Nie Huaisang drums on the table again. Lan Zhan
feels the corner of his mouth lift slightly but he continues to look down.

“Alright, show me what you’ve got and I’ll work my editing magic.” Nie Huaisang puts on a large
pair of wire-framed glasses. “There are some perks to having a friend who’s an art student.”

There is a beat of silence. In that beat, Lan Zhan processes the fact that Nie Huaisang has said they
are friends.

“I do not have any photos of myself.”

The silence falls again.

Then Nie Huaisang stands up.

“My time has come.”

“Trust me. This is perfect.”

Lan Zhan tenses his hands and slides his eyes to the side. The park is deserted but he still feels self
conscious, even though Huaisang had reassured him that he did not need to pose or smile.

“Okay, now just keep your hair over to one side so it doesn’t blow in your face. Good, and look
into the distance.”

“Where?”

“Umm, over at the top of the library building. Good, perfect, you’re perfect. Hold it-”
Lan Zhan focuses on the distant rooftop and tries not to blink in the chill wind. A gust stirs the
ginkgo tree above him and its delicate golden leaves fall like petals through the air.

“Yes! Perfect!” Huaisang rises from where he has been crouching. “Okay come and look,
Mianmian you too, what do you think?”

They gather around Huaisang’s phone. Lan Zhan blinks.

It is a full body portrait photo. The sky above him is the pure, pale blue you only get towards the
end of the year. It makes the towering gingko tree glow. It’s golden leaves fall around him like
pieces of sunlight. Lan Zhan stands among them, upright, statue-like with his hands behind his
back. The breeze lifts the end of his hair ribbon and the hem of his wide trousers, the same colour
as the sky, giving life to his still posture. The photo is a vision of blue and gold.

Lan Zhan blinks again. He has never seen himself like this before.

Qingyang leans in. “Wow!”

“I know right?” Nie Huaisang smiles. “Talent like mine takes hard work, as well as a certain
natural predisposition.”

“I meant ‘ wow, Wangji you look really good ’’, you ass.”

“Oh yeah, I mean that goes without saying.” Huaisang says, tilting his head. “You happy with it? I
can send it over, I just need to scan you.”

Lan Zhan nods, opens his wechat QR code and holds out his phone. His friend adds him and
quickly attaches the photo and it pings up on Lan Zhan’s screen.

“Thank you.”

“No worries, what are friends for? If not taking good photos of you?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t have an answer for that question. He has the chat with Wei Ying open but is
hesitating about how to caption the photo.

“You gonna ask him now?” Qingyang nods and raises her eyebrows, her usual gesture of
encouragement.

Lan Zhan shakes his head. “I want to ask him in person.”

In the silent study room, the air is warm and close. Lan Zhan sits in the far corner of the room at a
desk facing the wall, a stack of textbooks on his left. He has become so absorbed in finding
references for today’s lecture notes that he does not notice when another student sits down at the
desk to his left.

He does not notice, until a hand reaches over and tugs at his sleeve. He tenses slightly, then
recognises the hand.

“Hey!” Wei Wuxian whispers with a smile. “How was class? Did I miss anything?”
Lan Zhan slides his eyes over and tries to express sshhh with only his expression. Wei Ying
theatrically puts a finger to his lips and flips open his notebook. Lan Zhan returns to his notes from
the morning class. The final paragraph details an assignment set by their new lecturer.

Lan Zhan’s hands hover over the keyboard. He curls them both into fists, and squeezes twice.

He casts his eye over to Wei Ying who is cross-legged on his chair, spinning a pen in his left hand.

Lan Zhan tenses again and reaches for his phone. He is going to ask him.

He taps on his chat with Wei Ying. He slides his eyes over once more, then back to his phone. He
is going to do it.

Lan Zhan types hurriedly and sends the message to Wei Ying before he can think twice. He locks
his phone and waits.

Wei Ying’s phone lights up on the desk between them. Lan Zhan gets the briefest flash of a blue
and gold lockscreen before Wei Ying snatches it up. In his peripheral vision, he watches Wei
Ying’s eyes widen as he reads, then fold into a smile as he types a reply.

Lan Zhan tenses his fists once then unlocks his phone.

LZ:There is a new assignment. It is a two-person, joint presentation.

LZ: Would you consider being my partner?

WY: Absolutely!

LWJ: New Thing #13 - Provided first aid (everything is okay, it was a minor injury)

LWJ: New Thing #14 - Took part in a photoshoot (one of my friends is a art student)

LWJ: [image attached]

LXC: Wow!!! That is a wonderful picture!

LXC: I really need to catch up with you

LWJ: Take your time, your birthday is more than 6 months after mine

LWJ: You have more than adequate time

 LXC: Actually

LXC: There is something new that I want to try, but I’ve been a little scared to do it

LWJ: Would the action have any harmful consequences?

LXC: I hope it wouldn't

LXC: No lasting harm, I think, even if it didn't go well

LWJ: You have my support if you wish to try it

LXC: Thank you

LXC: I think I would like to try

LWJ: Let me know if I can provide any support

LXC: I’m going to do it tonight

Chapter End Notes

Friends!!! This chapter was in my very first plan, and then it got lost in editing but all
your lovely comments about Lan Zhan's friendship with his debate teammates
reanimated it! Anyone who commented, you are the yiling laozu of this chapter so
thank you!!

I really wanted to show that friendship can be fun and reciprocal for people who have
different ways of communicating, you don't have to talk loads or make eye contact all
the time to be friends! Huaisang and Mianmian are loving being on the inside for both
sides of this love story. I think Mianmian is all for egging them on but Huaisang wants
to sit back and watch it unfold, and also hopefully get more photos for his end of
semester portfolio.

Did you spot the hint? Wei Ying 100% has that photo as his lock screen and
background now! And he's probably hounding Jiang Cheng to take photos of him to
respond with, expect his little brother takes the most unflattering angles and always
gets him blinking. Its quite a trial. Maybe Huaisang should just start a photography
business?

Oooh what's Xichen gonna do?? We will find out in the next update!!
edit: just came back to tidy up some spelling!
 Hot Sauce Noodles
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“Eh, Lan Zhan! Is this your place, or a cell? Are you secretly a monk?”

Wei Ying has already slid out of his scuffed shoes and stepped into Lan Zhan’s little apartment.
Lan Zhan looks up from where he kneels at the door, still untying his laces.

“I am not.”

Wei Ying turns twice on the spot, taking in the bare walls and sparse furniture.

“Where is your…stuff?”

“I keep everything in the closet.”

Wei Ying huffs a laugh and turns to face Lan Zhan. He raises a finger and tsks as if berating a
child.

“Repression isn’t the answer, Lan Zhan. You need to embrace yourself.”

Lan Zhan straightens, stepping into his flip flops. He is struggling to follow Wei Ying’s
conversation and is unsure if he is being teased.

“We should begin planning for the assignment.”

Wei Ying’s smile slides into a pout. Lan Zhan ploughs on, trying to get onto the solid
conversational ground of their academic work. It is the reason they agreed to meet. He is not sure
why their joint presentation needs to be planned at his apartment, rather than the university library
but Wei Ying had insisted.

“Lan Zhan, don't you want to give me a tour first?”

“The shower room is through that door. That is the closet. That is the kettle, if we want some hot
water."

Tour complete, Lan Zhan settles cross legged on the floor at his low table. He slides the floor
cushion towards Wei Ying. Their hands brush for an instant and he snatches his back, skin buzzing
at the unexpected touch. He rubs the spot roughly until the feeling passes and then moves to open
his laptop.

“I have reviewed the marking rubric and written an outline for the presentation. This will meet the
criteria for a score of at least 80/100.”

He turns the laptop to face Wei Ying, whose usual smile is absent. His friend blinks twice,
withdrawing his eyes from Lan Zhan’s hand to look at the screen. His subdued expression changes
as his eyes flick across the screen.

“Lan Zhan! This is so detailed! Can you plan all my assignments?”

“Only for joint projects. Otherwise it may be considered plagiarism.”

Wei Ying’s face slides into a slanted smile again. He lifts his eyebrows.

“And if I got on my knees and asked nicely, what would you say?”

That mental image causes Lan Zhan to lose track of his next words. He looks away, face growing
hot. He swallows and pulls the laptop back more roughly than he means to. He types a few lines,
not daring to reply because there is a yes dancing behind his lips.

Wei Ying laughs. Lan Zhan has realised in the past few weeks of their friendship that his friend
appears to actively enjoy creating situations that make him blush. He has not yet figured out why,
or how he should react, and so brings the conversation back to the assignment.

“We need to expand the verbal questioning section at the end of the presentation. Can you
anticipate what the lecturers might ask us?”

Wei Ying nods and scrabbles around in his backpack, pulling out a battered notebook and pen.

“Show me the plan again. I need to take some notes so I can come up with ideas.”

Lan Zhan turns his laptop again and watches as Wei Ying takes scrawling notes which spider
across the unlined page, connected by lines and annotated with question marks and stars. As he
writes, the point of his tongue pokes out from the corner of his mouth. Lan Zhan watches fondly
then catches himself. Inappropriate. Do not stare at others. He looks away and reminds himself to
be respectful.

“Okay, let’s see.” Wei Ying’s injury has healed and Lan Zhan is happy to see he is back to writing
with his right hand again. He spins his pen, pausing to tap it on the page every few beats. “Well for
starters, I bet they’ll ask why we chose the topic.”

Lan Zhan nods and begins a new bullet point list at the end of his planning document. Wei Ying
rises to his feet as if buoyed by new ideas, tapping his pen on the notepad. Pacing the little room,
he rattles through arguments and counter-arguments at an astonishing pace. Lan Zhan focuses on
typing concise summaries of each point.

They have fallen into this rhythm recently during study sessions; their combination of ideas and
organisation compliment each other rather well. Wei Ying still rarely comes to class, but he will
appear unexpectedly when Lan Zhan is studying in the library or eating lunch in the canteen.

They have not had a second rollerblading lesson and Lan Zhan has not figured out a way to request
another practice, despite how much he wishes for one. He has been waiting for more than two
weeks, hoping Wei Ying will offer to teach him again.

Wei Ying pauses his stream of reasoning to hop up onto the narrow counter by the window. In the
moment of silence, Lan Zhan glances up and their eyes meet in a way that is beginning to feel
comfortable. Wei Ying smiles and rubs the back of his neck, looking away.

“Ah that was a lot, sorry.”

“Why are you apologising?”

“People don’t always like me, y’know, letting my thoughts run away like that.”

Lan Zhan’s chest tightens slightly. Has he done something to make Wei Ying think that he is
unlikeable? He stumbles towards a response, trying to reassure his friend before he can properly
plan his words.
“I like you.”

The words are out of his mouth before he knows he’s saying them. The words are true, of course,
but the meaning of them is too ambiguous and Lan Zhan looks away, ashamed. He has never said
that to anyone before.

Silence stretches between them.

Then a gentle chuckle melts away the tension.

“I like you too, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan dares to look up, and thinks he sees the vulnerability written across Wei Ying’s face. He
is sure his heart stops beating as Wei Ying’s eyes crinkle into a gentle smile.

“Lan Zhan, I rea-”

The table rattles as Lan Zhan’s phone buzzes across its surface. His lunch alarm. Lan Zhan hastily
swipes the alarm off and looks back up, but Wei Ying has pushed himself off the counter and is
spinning his pen again.

“Lunchtime?” He asks with a smile.

Lan Zhan chokes on an answer and nods his head. Only now is he fully processing the exchange
that has just taken place. He has no idea how to return to the topic, despite how much he longs to,
despite how much it felt like....

Lan Zhan tries to remind himself that like can mean a lot of different things. Besides, Wei Ying
was probably only being polite by returning the statement. If someone gives a compliment, it is
correct to return it. He should not have put Wei Ying in a situation where he felt obligated to return
that statement.

“Lan Zhan?” Wei Ying’s voice interrupts his spiralling self-criticism. “What do you usually eat for
lunch at home?”

Lan Zhan stands, eyes averted as he speaks. “Noodles.”

“Takeaway?” Wei Ying glances around at the lack of cooking equipment. “Unless you boil them
in your kettle?”

The mental image of noodles sticking out the spout of his electric kettle draws a short, huffed
breath from Lan Zhan.

“Ridiculous.”

Wei Ying laughs too and steps over to bump his shoulder lightly against Lan Zhan. It melts some
of the tension he is holding and he brings his gaze back up to his friend for a moment.

“Eat it everyday?”

Lan Zhan nods in response.

Wei Ying had teased him when he first realised Lan Zhan ordered almost exactly the same food at
the student canteen for every meal. However he then accepted it in a way few others have. Lan
Zhan has started to look forward to the days Wei Ying will unexpectedly appear to join him at his
regular table in the corner of the dining hall, despite his tendency to talk with his mouth full.
“The stall is nearby, we can walk there.” Lan Zhan pockets his phone and steps towards the door,
bending to put his shoes on and tie the laces.

“Eh, Lan Zhan, is it all rabbit food?” Wei Ying pads after him in his socks. He shuffles into his
shoes in a way that presses the backs of the shoes flat.

“I do not believe the stall owner sells any type of pet food. Even the cooked vegetables would be
unsuitable for rabbits as they should only eat certain raw vegetables.”

Lan Zhan finishes double knotting his laces and steps out of the front door, locking it carefully
behind them.

He thinks carefully then continues, "If purchased before they were cooked, the bean sprouts and
baicai at the stall would be acceptable daily food for a rabbit's dietary requirements."

“Wha-?” Wei Ying’s laugh echoes in the concrete stairwell as they descend side by side. “Lan
Zhan, I mean do they sell meat?”

“The stall is just outside the courtyard, you may ask for yourself.”

They round the corner and Wei Ying stops suddenly, a few meters from the stall. His mouth is
open and he turns his head between the stall and Lan Zhan in silence.

“Wei Ying?”

“Hot sauce noodles? La jiang mian?!” Wei Ying laughs. “Lan Zhan I would never have guessed
you had such good taste.”

Lan Zhan doesn’t dignify that with a reply. He steps up to the stall and nods politely to the owner.

She wipes her hands on her patterned apron and smiles. “You brought a friend today!”

Lan Zhan nods again, inexplicably feeling his ears grow hot. He is grateful when the noodle aunty
starts making up his meal without further comment. When the tub of noodles, green vegetables and
clear broth is made up, she hands it to Lan Zhan. He is about to thank her when a cry of dismay
erupts from his friend.

“Lan Zhan! ” Wei Ying stares at the tub. “What are you doing to this poor lady?”

Lan Zhan looks up with concern, utterly baffled. Wei Ying’s expression, however, has morphed
into a wide grin. “Aunty, is this really a la jiang mian stall like your sign says?”

“This young man is my best customer, so I hope you won’t be too judgemental about his order.”
The stall owner smiles. “But you're not wrong, hot sauce noodles are my signature dish.”

“Then give me your hottest, sauciest noodles!” Wei Ying raises his eyebrows at Lan Zhan. “Extra
tofu - no pork, please!”

“Mmmm, Lan Zhan, it's sooo good.” Wei Ying says through a mouthful of noodles. Bright red oil
stains his lips, making them shine. He takes another bite and moans. “This is the best thing I’ve
ever put in my mouth.”

Lan Zhan has to look away. Shameless, he thinks desperately. Although he is not sure if he thinks it
about Wei Ying or himself.

“Seriously, I think it might actually be criminal. How can you order those bland noodles from what
must be the best la jiang mian stall in the whole city?”

“I don’t eat spicy food.”

“You don’t like hot spice?” Wei Ying looks up from his love affair with the noodles, chopsticks
frozen in mid-air, dripping oil.

Lan Zhan pauses, it would be inaccurate to say he doesn’t like it. “I have never eaten spicy food.”

“Never? Hmm…” Wei Ying rests his chopsticks on the side of his tub. “Eh, which number are you
on for your ‘New Things’ list?”

Lan Zhan mentaly calculates, looking down at his own half-full tub. “Fourteen.”

The bright red tub of noodles slides into his vision.

“Would you like to make it to fifteen?” Wei Ying’s tone has changed; it is softer, encouraging
without pressuring, but Lan Zhan thinks he detects a hint of excitement too.

Lan Zhan regards the food. The taste of all the ingredients, save the chilli paste, are familiar to
him. The textures are acceptable too, almost identical to his usual order, which is almost more
important. He gives himself a minute to consider, and Wei Ying does not interrupt.

Finally, resolutely, he looks up and nods. Wei Ying’s face lights up with a smile and he turns his
chopsticks so that the handles are facing Lan Zhan. He takes them and focuses seriously on the
food in front of him, gathering a whorl of noodles into a neat bundle. He lifts them, watching the
red oil slide into the tub.

He glances up, seeking encouragement from Wei Ying, only to discover he is being filmed.

“Ridiculous.”

“Don’t stop Lan Zhan, I’m just getting evidence for your brother!” Wei Ying nods, pressing his
lips into a wide, flat smile.

Full of trepidation, he lifts the noodles to his mouth. The texture is fine, oilier than he is used to but
it does not make him baulk. He chews more rapidly than normal, very aware of being filmed, and
swallows.

“Good, right?”

It is fine. He is fine. He is-

Burning spreads over his lips, ice cold and fiery hot at the same time. The flames are spreading
inside his mouth, his lips feel like they are vibrating. He presses his tongue against the room of his
mouth. It only makes it worse.

“Lan Zhan?”

Heat slides down his throat, burning all the way into his stomach. It is so hot that Lan Zhan’s skin
starts to feel cold by comparison. The little hairs on his arms are standing on end. An
uncontrollable shiver passes over his skin.

“Lan Zhan, are you-?”

He gasps in a breath of cool air which only makes the flames in his mouth burn hotter. He tries to
look at Wei Ying but there are tears clouding his vision. He can feel his pulse in his lips.

“Ahhh…” He tries to breath out and it is painful. He is shivering again as the heat burns inside
him.

“Lan Zhan! You’re shaking!” Wei Ying shifts closer, still a blurry shape in Lan Zhan's teary eyes.

“S-so cold….Wei Ying…”

“Uhh...it’s okay, it’s okay. I’ll make you some hot water. It’s okay, just wait there.”

Lan Zhan blinks through the tears and starts to rub his hands over his bare forearms. He really is
shaking now. He can barely believe how cold he is while his mouth feels like it is blistering.

Wei Ying rushes about in front of him, quickly shutting off the kettle before it boils too loudly. He
fills a flask and crouches down beside Lan Zhan, holding out the water.

“Here, here, drink this. Warm water should help, it’s not too hot, I checked.”

Lan Zhan drinks, barely able to tell the temperature of the water in his mouth and swallows with
difficulty.

“I’m so sorry Lan Zhan, I didn’t even think, I’m so used to spice I didn’t-” Wei Ying pours more
water from the flask into the little plastic cup. “Are you still cold?”

Lan Zhan downs a second cup, letting the water soothe his burned throat. He nods, reaching for the
flask. Wei Ying hands it to him and shoots back to his feet.

“I’ll get you something warm to wear. In the closet, right?”

“Mn.” Lan Zhan replies between gulps of water, beginning to recover. “Thank y-” He freezes,
remembering exactly what he has tacked on the wall inside his closet. He turns, horrified, and
realises he is too late.

Wei Ying steps out of the closet, gently holding Lan Zhan’s blue fleece. His frantic energy is gone
and a fond smile is lifting the corner of his lips. His eyes shine with unreadable softness.

“You kept it?”

Lan Zhan looks away, left hand curling into a tight fist. So embarrassing. He drinks more water as
a distraction.

“I’m very flattered. I’ll have to draw you another one sometime.” Wei Ying laughs lightly and
holds out the fleece as he crouches down. “What should I draw next time? You again?”

Lan Zhan takes the fleece, still not looking, and hastily pulls it over his head to hide the blush that
is spreading over his already red face. The pale blue, silk-lined top is soft against his skin. He
focuses on that and not on the fact that Wei Ying now knows he has not only kept, but displayed
the portrait.
“Or should I do a self-portrait for you? Something like my weibo profile pic?” Wei Ying is
grinning again as he sits himself next to Lan Zhan on the floor, leaning against the side of Lan
Zhan’s bed.

“Dangerous,” replies Lan Zhan, he has absolutely no desire to encourage Wei Ying to continue his
habit of life-threatening skate jumps. The flames are subsiding now, although his lips still feel
numb, and he is taking a while to recover from the shock.

“Hmm, that is true. What can I draw for you then….? Oh!” Wei Ying nudges him with his elbow.
“I saw all those books on your shelf in there, how about a bunny rabbit?”

Lan Zhan blanches, something between shame and defensiveness washing over him. It is
something he never shares. It’s too close to his heart. He tenses, ready to be teased again, as he has
always been, for his intense interest in rabbits.

Wei Ying tilts his head. He doesn’t tease.

“Do you like bunnies, Lan Zhan?”

Lan Zhan presses his lips together. He nods, infinitesimally.

Wei Ying hums and leans over to pick up his notepad and pen from where they had been discarded
on the floor. Lan Zhan relaxes as the topic seems to have been dropped, he is glad they are
returning to their studies. He flips his laptop open and begins to review the notes he had taken on
Wei Ying’s ideas.

They work together in companionable silence. Lan Zhan highlights the sections of their plan that
will require references, regularly taking sips of warm water. He begins to search through his folder
of the required reading articles for sources to support their points, organising the quotes by theme.

Wei Ying shifts position periodically, sometimes leaning against Lan Zhan’s bed, sometimes cross
legged beside him, always hunched over his notepad. He has his phone balanced on one knee,
presumably also looking at sources.

Lan Zhan has almost finished scan-reading his list of articles when a blast of electronic noise
makes him flinch.

“Hey! Wen Qing whats up?” Wei Ying sits stiffly upright as a voice speaks quickly through his
phone. “That was today? Oh shit, when were we supposed to meet again?”

Wei Ying makes an exaggerated, fearful expression towards Lan Zhan as the voice on the other
end of the phone rises in volume. “Yep, yes, absolutely, on my way captain!”

Wei Ying scrambles to his feet. Looking about him distractedly as he shuts off the call. Lan Zhan
rises too.

“Something has happened?”

“I forgot roller derby practice was moved to this afternoon. Wen Qing is going to skin me alive,
unless Yanli-jie can calm her down before I arrive.”

Lan Zhan bends and retrieves Wei Ying’s backpack, holding it out. “I sincerely hope Jiang Yanli
succeeds. I would rather you were not skinned alive.”

Wei Ying laughs shakily and takes the bag, dropping his phone and pen in before slinging it over
 one shoulder and shuffling into his shoes.

“Sorry that almost poisoning you was the only thing I contributed today.” Wei Ying smiles again
but Lan Zhan is starting to recognise that particular smile which does not quite reach his eyes. It
perturbs him enough to make Lan Zhan pause and Wei Ying turns to leave, opening the door.

Lan Zhan reaches out, holding Wei Ying gently by the elbow.

“You have unfairly criticised yourself twice today.” It is not exactly what Lan Zhan means to say
but he does not let go.

Wei Ying stops but does not turn. Lan Zhan takes a breath, allowing himself to speak slowly.

“Your contributions are invaluable. Your support is appreciated.” Lan Zhan squeezes his friend’s
arm gently, trying to reinforce his point. “I hope you will speak more kindly of yourself in future.”

Wei Ying remains frozen for a moment. When he turns he is smiling again, although he keeps his
eyes closed for a beat before slowly blinking them open. He reaches up with his other hand, as if to
remove Lan Zhan’s grip. Instead he rests his hand gently over Lan Zhan’s.

“You’re too kind to me, Lan Zhan.” The warmth of Wei Ying’s fingers curling around his own
pushes anything but a one-word response out of his mind.

“Impossible.” Lan Zhan looks away as Wei Ying gently lifts his arm away and places the battered
notebook in his hand.

“I’ll pick this up when I next come over to study, yeah?”

Lan Zhan’s eyes widen as they fall on the open notebook.

Wei Ying has drawn a delicate, detailed sketch of a small rabbit. The rabbit has short, upright ears
and looks very much like a dwarf breed that Lan Zhan recently bought a new book about. The
rabbit is standing on its hind legs, with a little speech bubble above its head;

Wei Ying is very sorry he poisoned Lan Zhan! He promises to buy you a safer meal next time!

The level of detail, the accuracy of the drawing, is astonishing and sets Lan Zhan’s heart beating a
little faster. That Wei Ying took the time to draw something so important to him accurately, rather
than laugh at his interest makes his heart soar. He is so happy that-

“Wow! Lan Zhan!” Wei Ying is already out of the front door. “You’re smiling! You really do like
bunnies, huh?”

Overcome with embarrassment, Lan Zhan slams the door shut.

Chapter End Notes

Early update to make up for the later one last week!

Wei Ying is being a bit hard on himself today. Although he comes across as
supremely confident and sure of himself, I still get the impression he can be self-
critical too. He definitely appreciates Lan Zhan’s words, not many people bother
complimenting him like that! (I want to make it clear Wen Qing is NOT that mad, we
all know her threats come from a place of love.)

I feel like NHS, I still don’t know what they’re studying or what the topic of their
presentation is. I don’t know, I really don’t know. Any thoughts?

‘I like you’ in Mandarin is ‘wo xihuan ni’. Xihuan can be used as ‘like’ for all sorts of
things (e.g. wo xihuan mian, i like noodles) but when you say it to a person it has a
heavy ‘i fancy you’ connotation. Poor Lan Zhan, he’s barely admitted his feelings to
himself and he’s already confessing by mistake!!

Here is an excellent recipe for the spicy noodles they have, I would recommend!
https://thewoksoflife.com/shanghai-hot-sauce-noodles/
Lan Zhan’s reaction to spice is very much based on my first time eating proper
Southern Chinese food (Hunanese cuisine, in my case, which is famously spicy). He
did comparatively well as I had to lie down and be wrapped in a blanket.

The rabbit breed is the Netherland Dwarf, it is extremely small and well suited to
living indoors. Lan Zhan is especially fond of them because they are affectionate and
gentle, but do not particularly like to be held unless they are very comfortable with
someone. His dream that he will never admit (apart from maybe to Wei Ying) is to
have at least 2 or 3 so they can keep each other company.

Does Lan Zhan go to the large open air pet markets so common in Chinese cities like
Shanghai? No, because his formidable self-control would instantly dissolve and he
simply does not have the room in his little apartment for all the bunnies.
 Commentator's Box
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“See? Isn’t it easier with skates rather than blades?”

Lan Zhan keeps his eyes fixed on his borrowed skates as they roll slowly along the flat track. It is
easier. He does not want to admit this, however, because Wei Ying might stop holding his hand.
Lan Zhan knows he should not be withholding the truth.

He doesn’t say anything, pressing his lips together.

“Your posture is good, but try to bend your knees just a little more, like you’re on your board.
That’s it!”

Lan Zhan looks up at Wei Ying, who is skating backwards, pulling him along with a smile that
crinkles up his eyes. His heart beats faster and he looks down again. Just a little while longer, it
isn’t wrong to hold hands with a friend.

“Good, now shift your weight onto one foot.” Wei Ying lets go, skating back farther, until only
their fingertips touch. “Perfect, now lean onto the other foot.”

Feeling exposed without the pressure on his wrist, Lan Zhan tries to push himself forward with the
edge of his inside wheels. He manages to push off twice, knees bent to keep balance, but each time
Wei Ying skates another centimetre out of reach. Leaning forward to Wei Ying’s outstretched
hand, he loses balance and tips headlong towards the floor. His hands fly out in desperation.

“Wei Ying!”

The noise of skates on wood and suddenly Wei Ying is right there.

Hands grip his elbows, saving him from the fall.

Lan Zhan’s face makes contact with Wei Ying’s chest. His cheek pressing against the soft black t-
shirt. He breathes a panicked breath and the pressure from Wei Ying’s hands increases, grounding
him.

Lan Zhan manages to regain his balance and finds his hands are holding onto Wei Ying’s
shoulders. Shakily, he tips onto his left toe stop and straightens up, bringing his gaze from the
floor.

They are face to face.

They are so close he can feel Wei Ying’s breath on his own lips. Lan Zhan’s eyes inch upwards
and they make eye contact. Wei Ying’s pupils expand until his irises look almost black. Wei
Ying’s hands still hold him firmly, and Lan Zhan does not remove his grip either. He swallows, his
lips parting unconsciously.

They are so close and everything inside Lan Zhan is pulling at him to just lean in and-

BANG!

The sudden noise makes them both jump, gripping each other tighter. They look around wide-eyed
and then Wei Ying starts to laugh as they both spot people coming in through the main door, which
is still swinging on its hinges.

“That door gets me every time, it’s been broken for almost a year.” He laughs a little shakily and
lifts Lan Zhan’s hands from his shoulders. “Looks like people are starting to arrive for the match,
here, come with me.”

With that, Wei Ying spins gently so that he is facing away from Lan Zhan. He places Lan Zhan’s
hands on his own hips, covering them with his own hands to keep them in place. Lan Zhan barely
stifles a gasp at this new point of contact.

Wei Ying doesn’t appear to notice, he holds Lan Zhan’s hands firmly in place and skates quickly
across the hall towards the bench where they left their shoes. Lan Zhan is pulled along like a trailer
but he hardly registers the indignity of it. His mind is utterly taken up with the way Wei Ying’s
body moves under his hands.

He is so completely enraptured that he does not notice Wei Ying stopping when they reach the far
end of the hall. He nearly rolls straight into the back of him. Lan Zhan only manages to stop
himself by forcefully gripping Wei Ying and bracing his arms as his skates slide under him.

"Lan Zhan!"

Wei Ying lets out a short yelp and has to put an arm out to steady himself on the wall. Shameless,
Lan Zhan chastises himself. He pulls his hands away so quickly that his skates slide, he lunges for
the bench and pulls himself onto it.

Lan Zhan focuses on removing the skates and tying the laces of his shoes. Wei Ying does the
same, in silence, and Lan Zhan begins to worry his thoughts are too obvious. I've made him
uncomfortable.

"I apologise." He forces himself to say it.

"No worries.” Wei Ying bumps his shoulder, voice full of smiles. “We just need to practice your
stopping skills next time.”

Lan Zhan stands from the bench. More people are beginning to arrive for the roller derby match
and their voices are starting to fill the hall. Time to leave.

"Wait! I’ve got something for you, a surprise. Follow me, you'll like it, I promise."

With the growing noise bouncing around the hall, it takes a minute for the sentence to sink in. Lan
Zhan blinks, then nods. Wei Ying turns and opens the side door beside their bench. A grin splits
his face and he lifts his eyebrows.

"I think you might be able to add this to your list too."

Lan Zhan's mind stumbles over the words, processing them at half speed and he gratefully follows
his friend into a quiet stairwell. Wei Ying climbs the stairs two at a time, his rollerblades clacking
together in his hand with each step.

When they reach the floor above, Wei Ying pauses and fishes a flat, silver key from the pocket of
his ripped jeans.

"Don't ask how I got this." He smiles.

Lan Zhan nods and does not ask.

Wei Ying pouts slightly and turns the key, stepping into the room beyond. Lan Zhan pauses on the
threshold, casting his eyes around. It is a small box room. The wall that faces towards the sports
hall has a large window in it which allows a clear view of the track. Below the window is a table
holding a black microphone and small sound console. Two worn leather armchairs point towards
the viewing window.

"A commentator's box?"

"Surprise!"

"Are we required to provide commentary to the match?" The idea makes Lan Zhan's stomach
clench.

"Oh yes, it's absolutely essential." Wei Ying collapses into one of the chairs, folding his legs
underneath himself.

Lan Zhan's jaw clenches, he doesn't step over the threshold. "I will not be able to do so. I am sorry
to let you down."

"Lan Zhan! I'm teasing you again!" Wei Ying bends one knee, pulling it in towards his chest and
swings the other foot off the edge of the armchair.

"Oh."

"I just borrowed the key from the janitor's cupboard, there's no need to commentate anything." Wei
Ying's eyes gain a dangerous light. "Wouldn't it be fun, though?"

Lan Zhan doesn’t reply, but steps into the small room, closing the door carefully. He sits straight-
backed in the empty armchair, still feeling a little uncertain of what is expected of him. He catches
his hair ribbon in his left hand, thumb gliding reassuringly over the smooth silk.

He watches as the hall below fills up with spectators.Their noise is a distant hubbub and Lan Zhan
feels grateful that he does not have to be down there amongst them. He opens his mouth to thank
his friend but then Wei Ying leaps out of his seat.

“My team is here!” He declares, smiling down at Lan Zhan. “I’d better go down, I’ll be back in a
bit!”

Lan Zhan listens to Wei Ying clatter down the stairs and then watches his black-clad figure weave
quickly through the crowd towards five people in lilac uniforms. Lan Zhan leans forward a little.
He manages to make out the star of Nie Huaisang’s helmet and recognises the three girls he met at
the previous match. The fifth member is taller, almost Wei Ying’s height, with hair that has been
cropped close at the sides and left longer on top. This person pulls uncomfortably at the lilac shorts
of their uniform, as if unused to wearing such form-fitting clothes.

Wei Ying wraps an arm around Nie Huaisang’s shoulder and leans familiarly on the shorter skater.
Another of his teammates, (by the length of her hair it is likely Wen Qing), rolls up to him. Wei
Ying’s head tips back in laughter and Wen Qing punches him on the shoulder. He stumbles back,
as if mortally wounded, towards the new team member who steps smartly out of the way. Wei
Ying regains his balance, still laughing and puts a hand over his heart. He rests his head on the
shoulder of another skater, possibly Jiang Yanli, who gives him a one-armed hug.

Lan Zhan pulls his gaze off Wei Ying, self-doubt sticking cold and hard in his throat. He is this
affectionate with all his friends. Have I misread his actions toward me?

He retrieves his phone from his pocket to distract himself from this thought and adds a new line to
his list:

Lan Wangji’s List of 21 Things He Did Before He Turned 21

1. Lived alone

2. Switched to paperless note-taking

3. Learned to skateboard

4. Competed in a debate

5. Made a friend

6. Went to a roller derby

7. Edited a video

8. Made a social media account

9. Texted Wei Ying

10. Chased by a security guard

11. Rollerbladed (badly)

12. Held Wei Ying’s hand

13. Provided first aid

14. Took part in a photoshoot

15. Said ‘I like you’ to someone

16. Ate la jiang mian

17. Visited a commentator’s box

He opens up the chat app, planning on sharing this new thing and sees that Xichen is already
typing something.

LXC: Wangji I’m doing my twelfth new thing today!!!!

LXC: I have a date!!!!

His chest tightens slightly in a mix of surprise, brotherly concern and a little hint of pride. Xichen
had been unusually reticent to share what his eleventh thing was, but Lan Zhan now begins to
suspect it may have been related to this date.

LWJ: Is he a good person?

LWJ: Where are you going for your date?

LXC: He is a very good person, moral and kind!!!

LXC: I think even Uncle might approve of me asking him out

LXC: He says the location is a surprise, I’m meeting him in the park near your campus though!!!

LWJ: Stay safe. Keep in contact throughout the day.

LXC: Absolutely!!!!

The uncharacteristic abundance of exclamation marks makes Wangji think his brother is very
excited. He decides to text Xichen regularly in order to make sure he is safe today. He swipes out
of the chat app and opens his photo gallery.

The first picture is of the new floor cushion and indoor flip flops he has bought. The cushion is a
soft grey and the sandals a dark red, the same colour as Wei Ying’s skates. He hesitates. Should he
send his friend the photo, or leave it a surprise for the next time he visits? Or perhaps buying those
things was too presumptive?

He is still hesitating when the door opens sharply and Wei Ying bounces back in. Lan Zhan hastily
locks his phone, cheeks heating slightly.

“Sorry for taking so long, did you miss me?” Wei Ying folds himself into his seat and holds out a
bottle of water.

“I appreciated the time alone.” Lan Zhan tries to reassure his friend. He takes the bottle and snaps
open the cap, hurriedly taking a drink to cover how unreasonably flustered he feels.

Wei Ying’s smile dims slightly and he coughs once. “I’m gonna introduce my little brother, it’s his
first time competing. Can you pass the mic?”

Lan Zhan does so, then leans back, returning to his upright posture.

Wei Ying scans the console in front of them, tongue sticking from the corner of his mouth.

“This should be it.”

He flicks a metal switch and a little red light blinks on in front of Lan Zhan. Wei Ying leans into
the microphone with an open-mouthed smile.

“Welcome, friends, to the third match of the season at SJTU!” Lan Zhan watches through the
window as the crowd below look up in surprise at the unexpected voiceover. Nie Huaisang waves
up at the commentator’s box.

“I’m just dropping in to introduce our newest competitor.”

The new team member buries his face in his hands and Wei Ying’s smile grows bigger.

“This young man has never participated in a derby before, we don’t even know if he knows the
rules! What he lacks in experience he makes up for in suppressed rage! Please give it up
foooorrrrr…. CHENGCHENG!”

“My name is JIANG WANYIN!”

The shout must have been loud indeed because Lan Zhan hears it clearly in the commentators box.
Muffled laughter and applause follow and Wei Ying leans in one more time.

“I owe you one, Cheng-di! Jiayou!!”

The young man responds with an angry hand gesture but Wei Ying only laughs and switches off
the microphone. The little red light on the panel blinks out and Wei Ying turns to Lan Zhan with a
grin.

“I think I make a pretty good commentator.”

“I think you made your brother angry.”

“Nah, that’s just how he expresses affection. If he ever calls you an idiot, watch out. That’s code
for ‘I care about you’.”

“Does the rest of your family use this code?” Lan Zhan feels a little baffled by the idea of
intentionally insulting the person you care about.

“Cheng-di takes after his mother in that respect. Yanli-jie and I are more straight-forward, I think.”

Wei Ying shifts out of his chair and sits on the armrest of Lan Zhan’s instead. He reaches across
Lan Zhan and takes the water bottle from his hand. As he tilts his head back to drink, a trickle of
water escapes his lips and runs down the side of his neck.

Lan Zhan swallows and makes himself look away as the bell rings to start the first round of the
match. His eyes wander away from the action to the main entrance to the hall, just as the door
opens.

“My brother is here.”

Wei Ying spits out his drink.

“You invited your brother?” He says in a strangled voice that morphs into a laugh. “I wasn’t
expecting to meet your family today.”

“No.” Lan Zhan hurries to clarify. “It appears he is here with his date. There, by the main door. He
is the one in the dark blue jacket.”
He nods towards Xichen who is standing very close to another man dressed in a fitted grey t-shirt
and dark jeans. Their heads lean together, and they smile as if sharing a joke. Wei Ying is half way
through another sip of water and chokes again when Lan Zhan points them out.

“That’s your brother?”

“Yes.”

“Your brother is dating da-ge?!” Wei Ying sounds incredulous and Lan Zhan isn’t sure whether to
be offended on his brother’s behalf, or concerned.

“You have an elder brother too?”

“No, Lan Zhan, not my da-ge, The Da-ge! The man who is currently holding your brother’s hand is
Nie Mingjue, Huaisang’s older brother! He’s the reigning champion of Dagu Lu Market’s Sexiest
Butcher Competition! I’ve heard he can deadlift an entire cow.”

Lan Zhan is slightly perturbed. “My brother is a vegetarian.”

Wei Ying cackles and loses balance on the armrest, leaning into Lan Zhan.

“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan your so- oh. Wait, does your brother dislike crowds too?”

Xichen and his date have remained at the side of the hall, Nie Mingjue is leaning in close to say
something so that Xichen can hear over the noise of the crowd.

“Not to the same extent, but he does prefer quiet.”

Wei Ying flicks the switch on the console and pics up the mic, still leaning against Lan Zhan’s
shoulder. He speaks in a low, smiling voice like an airport announcer, “Nie Mingjue and Lan
Xichen, if you would kindly make your way up the stairs to your left. Your private viewing box
awaits.”

Lan Zhan watches his brother cover the lower half of his face with one hand, clearly hiding a
smile. He turns to his date, who is shrugging his shoulders. They both look up to the
commentator’s box and Wei Ying waves at them enthusiastically then turns to Lan Zhan and
bumps him on the shoulder.

“You don’t mind me inviting them up?”

“I appreciate it. Thank you.”

Wei Ying’s smile softens and they make eye contact for the second time that day. Lan Zhan looks
up into his eyes, lost and at peace all at once. A soft knock interrupts the moment and the door
opens. Xichen peers into the room.

“May we come in?”

“Yes, yes! As long as you don’t mind sharing a seat, there’s only two.” Wei Ying rises to greet the
two men and Lan Zhan joins him, standing at his shoulder.

“You two have definitely got the best view in the house, thanks for sharing.” Xichen’s date claps
Wei Ying on the back familiarly.

“Wangji, this is Nie Mingjue, I’m glad you two can meet.” Xichen smiles quietly and Lan Zhan
nods in greeting, not quite making eye contact with the tall stranger.
Xichen steps further in and smiles wider. “Wei Wuxian, it is lovely to meet you in person. Wangji
has told me so much about you.”

Wei Ying steps forward a little, both hands bunching in the sleeves of his t-shirt.

“Only the good bits, I hope! Xichen-ge, let's go and get some drinks from the booth downstairs!
We’ll make this a proper party.” Wei Ying talks easily, as if he has known Lan Zhan’s brother his
entire life. “And I need to show you the video I took of Lan Zhan trying la jiang mian for the first
time.”

This development startles Lan Zhan. He kept the video? Xichen has raised his eyebrows, though
his expression remains pleasant.

“I wondered who had introduced him to that particular dish. A drink sounds good, what would you
like?” Xichen turns to his date as he asks this. Nie Mingjue rubs the back of his neck, making his
arm muscles stretch the fitted grey top he wears.

“Anything, I trust your choice. But uh...maybe non-alcoholic this time?” Nie Mingjue’s voice is
low and a little gruff.

Lan Zhan carefully studies the way he acts towards his brother. He approves of the drink choice at
least.

“We’ll be right back. Lan Zhan, don’t worry, I’ll get something for you! Do you trust me too?”

Lan Zhan does not have time to respond before Wei Ying whisks Xichen out of the room and he is
left alone with the stranger. Nie Mingjue rubs the back of his neck again.

“Wangji, right?”

He nods, realising he has no idea what the correct script is for this situation.

“I’m Nie Mingjue. Most people just call me da-ge though, you can too if you like.”

Lan Zhan nods again.

“I don’t think either of us are great with words.”

The ensuing silence confirms the statement and Lan Zhan waits, unsure if he should respond.

“There’s something... important I wanted to say to you.” Nie Mingjue shifts position to lean against
the console so that they are no longer face to face.

Lan Zhan nods again, grateful that eye contact is not expected, and sits back in his armchair.

“I know your brother hasn’t dated before. And I know he is a very kind and a very trusting person.”

He nods. Xichen has always wanted to believe the best in everyone. It has made his life difficult in
the past and Uncle had spent a long time drumming into them both the need for caution in
interpersonal relationships.

Nie Mingjue takes a breath and continues.

“I’m not going to take advantage of that. I want you to know that I respect Xichen. And I care
about him. A lot. ”
Lan Zhan looks up at a spot just above the man’s head. “Good.”

Nie Mingjue, da-ge, smiles widely, cheeks dimpling in a way that's out of keeping with his tough
exterior. He nods and they both look away. Lan Zhan’s gaze falls onto the sound console. A red
light blinks back at him.

“The microphone.” Lan Zhan says with concern.

Nie Mingjue turns his head sharply, following Lan Zhan’s gaze.

“What-? Oh, fuck, the-” He fumbles and finds the switch he had accidentally sat on. He turns back
to Lan Zhan, red faced. Before Lan Zhan can read his expression the door is thrown open.

“What a performance! Did Huaisang practice that with you, as well as choosing your outfit?” Wei
Ying sticks his head into the room, face gleeful.

“Oh you little brat, come here!” Nie Mingjue pulls Wei Ying into a headlock. It would appear
violent if the two of them weren’t laughing. Wei Ying is quickly released though, when Xichen
steps into the room, smiling gently.

“Xichen, I-”

“-respect and care about me? Yes, I think the entire room heard.” Xichen steps forward, holding
out a can of juice with a turn of his lips that tells Lan Zhan he is both amused and deeply touched.
Nie Mingjue takes the can and pulls Xichen into a one-armed hug.

“Okay, okay any more of this and we’ll miss the whole match!” Wei Ying slides onto the arm of
Lan Zhan’s chair. He holds out a bottle of green tea to Lan Zhan, then twists open a beer for
himself. He takes a drink, spreading his arm over the backrest and casually leaning towards Lan
Zhan.

Lan Zhan pulls his eyes over to the flat track. He is very aware that Xichen is looking at him from
the other armchair, where he sits in an almost identical position with Nie Mingjue.

Lan Zhan refuses to make eye contact.

Xichen has tried to initiate conversations about Lan Zhan’s feelings a few times in the last week.
Lan Zhan still isn’t sure if Wei Ying thinks of him as anything other than a friend. There are these
moments where he is so sure...but trying to read someone as friendly and affectionate as Wei Ying
is so hard. Lan Zhan can’t quite bear to acknowledge his feelings when he is not sure if they are
reciprocated.

“YESSS! TAKE HIM DOWN!” Nie Mingjue’s shout makes Lan Zhan jump out of his thoughts.
Wei Ying laughs, but slides his gaze over to Lan Zhan as if to check in. Lan Zhan nods once and
turns back to watch the game.

Wei Ying’s friends are competing against a gold-clad team this time. Their outfits shimmer as they
scatter before Wen Qing’s formidable elbows. She clears the way for Huaisang who shoots in front
of the gold team’s jammer.

Jiang Yanli is blocking the opposition jammer; she appears to be doing so simply with her presence
without any need for contact. Lan Zhan’s eyebrows rise as Wen Qing skates past her, blowing a
kiss. Jiang Yanli catches the kiss and returns it with a smile.

The gold jammer trips over his own skates, regains his balance, and is immediately flattened by the
blurred shape of Jiang Wanyin.

“YAHOO! YES CHENG-DI!!” It’s Wei Ying’s turn to shout now, punching the air. He’s gotten so
wrapped up in the game he has forgotten his beer.

“ON YOUR RIGHT!” Nie Mingjue is practically on his feet. “HUAISANG!!”

Nie Huaisang barely dodges a tackle, skating to safety behind Luo Qingyang who squares off with
the attacker.

This match is, if anything, more intense than the first derby Lan Zhan watched. He is enjoying it,
but the shouting is starting to get under his skin, stiffening his spine. He balls his fists, and
something in his movement must catch Wei Ying’s eye because he looks over quickly.

“Hey, da-ge, how about we go down and watch at the trackside for a bit? I bet Huaisang would
really appreciate seeing you there.”

“Xichen, would you mind?” Asks Nie Mingjue with a tilt of his head.

Lan Zhan’s brother shakes his head and smiles, “Go ahead, I’ll come down and join you in a bit.”

Wei Ying leans across Lan Zhan to put his bottle on the table. His face comes close to Lan Zhan’s
ear and he whispers, “I’ll be back once Xichen-ge comes down, yeah?”

Lan Zhan swallows and absolutely does not turn to look at Wei Ying’s mouth which is so close to
his ear. He nods stiffly, needing quiet time but also wanting Wei Ying to know he is welcome to
come back. Wei Ying’s hand brushes his sleeve as he stands and turns to go.

“Let’s try to get near the front, I wanna get some pics of Cheng-di in those shorts.” Wei Ying says
gleefully. “I’m never gonna let him forget this.”

Nie Mingjue laughs. “Sounds good to me, can you get some photos of Huaisang too? I need to
have proof that he is capable of physical exertion for next time he refuses to help at the market.”

“Deal! See you two in a bit!” Wei Ying waves and the two of them step out and close the door.

Lan Zhan and his brother sit in comfortable silence, enjoying the game in the muffled quiet of the
commentator’s box. After a while, Lan Zhan feels ready to speak but Xichen beats him to it.

“I think Mingjue is a good person. We’ve been friends for a while now.”

“He is considerate to you. I appreciate his direct manner. Wei Ying knows and likes him.” Lan
Zhan replies, knowing his brother will value his honesty. “However, he can be loud.”

Xichen smiles knowingly and looks at him. “So can Wei Ying.”

Lan Zhan looks away, sensing yet another feelings talk looming ahead. He gathers himself and
asks his brother what has been on his mind since their text conversation earlier.

"How did you ask him out?“

Xichen looks down at his lap, cheek twitching in a slight smile. "I simply told him I wanted to go
on a date with him."

"I mean, how were you able to ask?"

There is a heavy pause, both of the brothers looking away.

"I got drunk." Xichen says quietly. He almost sounds proud of himself.

Lan Zhan’s mind reels, full of their uncle’s lectures on the dangers of alcohol.

"That was my tenth new thing.” Xichen smiles. “Asking him was my eleventh."

Lan Zhan remains silent, processing and readjusting his mindset. Even Kongzi consumed alcohol in
moderation, he did not think it necessary to abstain entirely. He looks out of the window towards
the crowd. There seems to be a break in play and the lilac team have skated over to the trackside to
rest. He watches a beaming Nie Mingjue pull his little brother into a bear hug that lifts the young
man off his feet.

"Do you disapprove?" Xichen asks seriously.

A small smile lifts the corner of Lan Zhan’s mouth.

"I do not."

Lan Zhan feels, rather than sees, his brother relax. Xichen gets to his feet.

“Perhaps I should return to my date.”

Lan Zhan nods and Xichen turns to open the door. He says something very quietly as the door
closes. Lan Zhan could swear it was ‘ good luck’.

It rattles Lan Zhan enough that he cannot respond before the door is shut. His focus falls, instead,
on Wei Ying’s practically untouched bottle of beer which sits on the table in front of him.

Irresponsible.

He forces his gaze back to the track, only to have his attention immediately taken by Wei Ying. He
has his arms around his teammates, laughing at some shared joke. Just seeing him laugh like that
lights something in Lan Zhan. He wants to make Wei Ying laugh like that. He wants to be the
person who Wei Ying wraps his arm around.

If Xichen can do it, so can I.

Before his judgement can get the better of him, Lan Zhan leans forward and takes a swig of the
alcohol. It is bitter, worse than traditional medicine, and Lan Zhan has to force himself to swallow.

He waits.

Apart from a slightly odd taste on his tongue, Lan Zhan doesn’t feel any different after a minute.
So he takes another sip. The taste isn’t so bad the second time, he thinks.

He waits again. He rehearses what he could say to Wei Ying. I like you? No he has already said
that. His mind stumbles and lands on Xichen’s phrasing. I want to go on a date with you. Just the
idea of saying it out loud makes Lan Zhan’s chest go tight.

He takes another drink.

And another.
-

By the time the door opens to the commentator’s box the bottle is long empty.

Lan Zhan doesn’t feel drunk at all. A little warmer than usual, maybe, but not drunk.

That is, until he stands up and the world tips slightly.

"Lan Zhan?" A familiar voice calls him and his brain takes a while to line up the owner of the
voice with a name.

“Wei Ying…”

His lips feel a little numb, as if he can't quite control them. A hand is waved in front of his eyes in a
blurry streak. Then Wei Ying comes into focus.

"Lan Zhan, are you…?"

Wei Ying. His hair is so shiny, blue-black. His eyes are….his lips...lips. Lan Zhan leans helplessly
towards them, realising he is in fact very, very drunk.

He suddenly remembers why he got drunk in the first place.

I want to go on a date with you.

Now is the time.

I want to go on a date with you.

"... want…" somehow the words he prepares in his head are not the ones that come out his mouth.

"What do you want?“ Wei Ying steps closer, his mouth turned in a slight frown.

“...want you…"

"What do you want me to do?"

Kiss me. Lan Zhan leans forward.

"Lan Zhan you're drunk!" Wei Ying laughs softly. He is steered back to his seat, one of Wei Ying’s
hands on each arm. It feels good. Once Lan Zhan is seated, Wei Ying leans back and releases his
grip.

Lan Zhan realises he is pouting, and rightfully so. Why did Wei Ying have to let go?

Unreasonable.

He reaches out to get Wei Ying back.

"You want the water? Here." Wei Ying presses a bottle into his hand.

No. That is not what he wanted. He lifts the bottle to pour it out, to show Wei Ying exactly what he
thinks of this measly substitute for his attention.

"Eh! Wait! Here, I'll help you.” Wei Ying takes the bottle back. “You'd better be good and drink,
 or you’ll feel ill later."

Of course he'll be good. Lan Zhan is always good. He is a pleasure to have in class.

The bottle is held to his lips and Lan Zhan opens his mouth, looking up at Wei Ying. Lost in his
eyes, Lan Zhan forgets to swallow and water runs down his chin.

"Silly boy, look at you."

A hand is on his cheek, thumb wiping just below his lower lip. It feels so good and he leans into it.
All he wants is to keep Wei Ying's hands on him. It seems as if the hand is about to be withdrawn
and Lan Zhan has to tell Wei Ying right now.

I want to go on a date with you.

"Want to go..." the rest words are lost as water spills out his mouth.

"I think that's a good idea, Lan Zhan."

Wei Ying agrees. The plan has worked. Lan Zhan pushes himself into standing.

Too fast.

The room spins, and he remembers nothing else.

Chapter End Notes

NMJ’s title of Sexiest Butcher is 100% inspired by this great playlist:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4vciXTris4kLCpgjHq7qFY?
si=Ju6iDn37RsCELFVy3lN6ow

He really can lift a whole cow carcass, although not a live cow!! He works at Dagu Lu
Market because it closes earlier than most. When Huaisang was younger it meant he
could be home in time to cook dinner and make sure Huaisang did his homework.
Now it gives him time to work part-time as a boxing instructor. p.s. Huaisang really did
pick out the muscle-exposing top that Mingjue is wearing (and the rest of the outfit, of
course). (Mingjue has still had a tough life and taken a lot of responsibility at a young
age, but in this story he is working on his anger issues and taking care of himself!)

(I have no idea where Meng Yao is, I like to think that with modern medicine his
mother, who he loves so much, survives and they are happy together and he does not
ruin his own or anybody else’s life seeking parental affection.)

Autistic Xichen isn’t a headcanon I have come across much, but to me he reads as
someone who masks heavily and relies on politeness and scripts and smiles to get
through social challenges. What are your thoughts?!

Jiang Cheng was a good egg here and agreed to take Wei Ying’s spot, so that he could
spend time with Lan Zhan. I think poor old JC is getting very tired of hearing every
single detail about Lan Zhan and just wants them to resolve this tension so he can have
some peace. (Cultural sidenote: calling him Chengcheng is unbearably cutesy,
something you'd call a toddler, hence his angry response.)
Did Wei Ying have something he wanted to ask? Why did he go to the trouble to get
them alone? Wait until the next chapter to find out…
 Hangover
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Lan Zhan opens his eyes and regrets it.

He closes them instantly against glaring light that stabs his eyes.

Even that movement makes his head swim.

What happened? Am I sick? Why is-

Oh.

Oh no.

The events of yesterday ride on waves of regret into his memory. He can only remember snippets,
grainy and broken, and he is almost glad he cannot remember more.

The beer.

“Lan Zhan you’re drunk!”

Water spilling out of his mouth.

Needing help to walk because the ground wouldn’t keep still.

Clinging to Wei Ying’s neck.

“Silly boy, be good.”

Being helped into bed.

Trying to ask out Wei Ying.

TRYING TO ASK OUT WEI YING!

Lan Zhan sits bolt upright, heart pounding in his chest. The room spins and tips like an awful roller
coaster. He clasps his head in his hands, pressing his temples and breathing roughly through his
nose. What have I done? What did I say to him?

When he finally feels like he is no longer on a boat, Lan Zhan opens his eyes again and
immediately wishes he had not.

These are not his bed sheets. This is not his apartment.

Lan Zhan is in a messy twin dorm room. The bed he is in is made with wrinkled grey sheets, the
narrow desk next to it strewn with books, papers and a first aid kit. The desk chair is piled with
discarded clothes. Lan Zhan’s stomach sinks as he recognises Wei Ying’s clothes from the day
before.

What have I done!?

Lan Zhan recovers slightly when he looks down and realises he is still clothed. His white linen top
is hopelessly crumpled. His hair, unbound, falls over his shoulders in unkempt tangles. Lan Zhan
reaches unconsciously for his ribbon and starts when he cannot find it.

Trying not to move too suddenly he searches the bed and finds nothing. He looks over the edge of
the bed, thinking it may have fallen on the floor, and nearly falls out himself.

Wei Ying is lying on the floor, one leg sticking out of an unzipped sleeping bag. His face is
peaceful in sleep. He is wearing a faded red tshirt and his hair is pulled in an unruly top knot.

The bun is tied with Lan Zhan’s ribbon.

His stomach lurches. He has no memory of this. Had he put his ribbon in Wei Ying’s hair? Had
Wei Ying let him? This idea turns his mind utterly blank.

The buzz of his alarm pulls Lan Zhan back. He hastily retrieves the phone from his trouser pocket
and mutes it, terrified that it might wake Wei Ying. The room tips slightly at his hurried
movements and it takes a second for him to actually read the time.

09:30

He has overslept by more than four hours. He only has fifteen minutes to get to class. If Lan Zhan
felt capable of talking, he thinks he might actually swear right about now. Pressing his lips together
against the growing panic, he slides to the edge of the bed. The room spins more and he has to stop
and breathe.

As he pauses, another shape shifts on the ground next to Wei Ying. It’s Wei Ying’s younger
brother, wrapped tightly in a sleeping bag. Lan Zhan lifts his gaze and realises the other bed is
occupied by Nie Huaisang, neatly tucked under a purple quilt, wearing a silk eye mask.

Did Jiang Wanyin and Huaisang both witness everything as well?

Lan Zhan doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to face any of them again.

He pushes himself into standing, stepping carefully around the sleeping bodies on the floor. Lan
Zhan can’t process this right now. He has to get to class. Any other option does not even occur to
him. He has to stick to his schedule and ground himself at least the tiniest bit in this overwhelming
situation.

He manages to find his white skate shoes. In contrast to the others’ shoes, which are strewn across
the room, his are unlaced and have been placed neatly by the door. A flash of a memory rekindles
in Lan Zhan’s head.

He stumbles towards the bed and it rises up to meet him. Soft. Comfy.

“Eh, come on, you can’t sleep with your shoes on. Roll over.”

A hand on his shoulder. Another on his hip. The world spins and Wei Ying is there, smiling down
at him.

Lan Zhan’s face heats, realising who must have placed his shoes here. He steps into them, bracing
against the wall as another wave of dizziness takes him. He checks his phone, only ten minutes to
get to class. At least Wei Ying stays on campus. If he walks quickly he can make it.

“Mmhf, Lan Zha…”

Lan Zhan freezes, then turns apprehensively. Wei Ying has rolled onto his side, mouth open in a
slight smile. His eyes are closed. He breathes slowly. Wei Ying is sleep talking. The heat in Lan
Zhan’s face spreads all the way to the tips of his ears. He cannot deal with this embarrassment, he
has to get to class. I cannot be late.

Lan Zhan tries to close the door quietly and then walks as fast as he can along the narrow corridor.
He runs his fingers along the white-painted wall, the smooth texture soothing his mind. As he steps
into the elevator, Lan Zhan catches sight of his hair in the mirrored walls and attempts to comb his
fingers through it. The movement of the elevator and the tugging quickly make him dizzy and he
has to stop and close his eyes again.

A mechanical voice announces he is on the ground floor and Lan Zhan hurriedly steps out,
wincing in the sunlight. He keeps his eyes down, looking at nothing but his own feet as he walks as
quickly as his pounding head allows him to. His hands clasp and unclasp at his sides.

I cannot be late. I cannot be late. I cannot be late.

He makes it to class with a minute to spare. His usual row is, mercifully, empty. He sinks into the
seat with relief, still feeling nauseous. The hall is unusually empty and quiet, which is another
small mercy.

I am not late. I am alright. Stick to your routine.

Realising he has no laptop, Lan Zhan pulls out his phone and loads up a new document in order to
take notes. His eyes land on multiple notifications in the chat app; four from his brother over the
course of last night.

LXC: How did it go?

LXC: I believe in you!

LXC: Let me know when you’re home safe

LXC: Wangji? Text me when you can

Lan Zhan simply does not have the headspace to interact with anyone. He switches his phone to
airplane mode, and tries to focus on the lecture.

Three hours later and Lan Zhan is starting to feel more like a person walking on solid ground. The
lecture was slow-paced and quiet. He even managed some water and a steamed bun during the
break.
He waits until the lecture hall empties and then heads out. The sky has kindly clouded over and
light isn’t stabbing his eyes in quite the same way it had.

What he needs now is to go home, shower, brush his hair and put on clean clothes. Maybe then,
just maybe, he will be able to face the soul crushing embarrassment he is currently repressing with
the remains of his willpower.

He makes it across campus, skirting the knots of students, and is passing through a narrow alley
when a shout rings out behind him.

“You!”

Lan Zhan keeps walking.

“Hey, stop! Lan Wangji! Hey, I’m talking to you!”

A hand grips his arm forcefully. Lan Zhan knocks it away with equal force and spins to face his
assailant, tension running through his body.

It’s Jiang Wanyin.

Lan Zhan doesn’t say anything, but takes a step back from the young man who is radiating
hostility. He does not have any capacity for confrontation right now.

“I’m not letting you run away this time!”

Lan Zhan presses his lips together, trying to fathom what he might have done that has made Wei
Ying’s brother so angry. He steps back again. The last thing he needs is Jiang Wanyin trying to
touch him again, not when he has been so close to the edge all day.

“Hey! Don’t-” Jiang Wanyin breathes forcefully through his nose. When he speaks again his voice
is lower, less confrontational. “Don’t leave, I just need to talk.”

Lan Zhan looks up, eyes flicking over the young man’s face. Then he nods and looks away.

Jiang Wanyin is opening his mouth to speak when another shout rings out from behind Lan Zhan.

“Stop!”

Lan Zhan turns his head. Two familiar figures are running towards them, one clutching a stitch and
panting heavily. Luo Qingyang arrives first and steps between Lan Zhan and Jiang Wanyin with
her arms outstretched.

“I know you’re angry, Jiang Cheng, but violence isn’t the answer.”

“Violence? I’m not going to hurt him!” Jiang Wanyin scoffs. “What gave you that idea?”

“Oh good,” pants Nie Huaisang, bending to rest his hands on his knees, “which part of your text ‘
I’m going to kill him’ did I misinterpret?”

Lan Zhan’s eyes widen.

“I didn’t mean literally! I was just... mad that he made me sleep on the floor.” Jiang Wanyin kicks
the ground as he says this.

“Lan Wangji didn’t even sleep in your bed, Huaisang did!” Luo Qingyang says indignantly.
“Yeah, if you wanna get mad about that, then get mad at my brother for insisting on having our
apartment to himself for his date.”

Lan Zhan’s head snaps around to look at Nie Huaisang. There is far too much going on in this
conversation and he isn’t sure he wants to understand any of it.

“Exactly, that doesn't make sense at all.” agrees Luo Qingyang. She does not move from her
position shielding Lan Zhan.

“It wasn’t just that!” Jiang Wanyin defends himself. “It’s the way he just up and left, he didn’t
even answer when my brother called him for help! After everything, he doesn’t deserve-” He sighs
forcefully and looks away.

In the ensuing silence, Lan Zhan finally gets up to speed with the conversation.

“Wei Ying needs help?” His heart quickens and he curses himself for having his phone off all
morning.

There’s a silent beat. All three students turn to look at him, staring blankly.

“You didn’t know?” Luo Qingyang asks quietly.

“But you’re his-” Nie Huaisang cuts himself off and casts a glance at Jiang Wanyin.

“Know what?” Lan Zhan glances between the three of them, a feeling of foreboding growing in his
chest.

They all look away. Jiang Wanyin scuffs the ground again with his heel.

“They’re trying to kick him out of the university.”

Lan Zhan’s brows draw together in confusion.

“Wei Ying excels academically.”

“Yeah, in your class, because it interests him.” Jiang Wanyin looks up at the sky and huffs another
breath. “They’ve been looking for an excuse to get rid of him since last year when he got in trouble
with the police because of his stunt skating. Then there was something about a campus security
guard reporting him. Then he missed a deadline in another module last week, without realising, and
that plus his attendance record…”

Wei Ying, why didn’t you tell me?

“Why did he try to call me today?” Lan Zhan cannot keep the urgency out of his voice.

“He needed a character reference. Someone to vouch for him to the head of your department.” Nie
Huaisang says dully. “None of the lecturers would do it, and none of us are in his course.”

“I’ll do it.”

“Well it’s too late now! He’s already in front of the review panel!” Jiang Wanyin turns away and
kicks at nothing in his anger.

“Where is the panel being held?” Lan Zhan isn’t going to let this go.

Luo Qingyang blinks uncertainly, “I think he said it was in the department head’s office.”
 Lan Zhan starts running.

Chapter End Notes

Poor Lan Zhan, so much has happened since last night!! To be honest I’m pretty
impressed he managed to hold it together for so long, I’m not sure even I could stick to
my routine after a bad hangover like that.

And poor Jiang Cheng! Anger seems to be his only outlet but he’s just worried about
his brother. He definitely wouldn’t have killed Lan Zhan, I promise, but it was fun to
write Mianmian and Huaisang showing up to save the day!

Read on to see what happens next!

 Defense
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Out of breath, Lan Zhan gathers himself in front of the department head’s office.

He is very aware that his clothes have obviously been slept in, his hair is a mess and he hasn’t
brushed his teeth in over 24 hours. He feels buzzing tension run under his skin. Nothing has gone
to plan all day and every sense is uncomfortably heightened.

It doesn’t matter, Wei Ying needs his help and Lan Zhan can’t let him down.

He can vaguely hear voices inside the office and raises his hand to knock.

Before he can, Wei Ying opens the door. He is dressed in smart black trousers and a plain t-shirt.
His hair is pulled back tidily. Lan Zhan looks up into Wei Ying’s eyes, they are red-rimmed like
he hasn’t slept, or like he’s been-

“Lan Zhan.” His voice sounds empty.

Unable to speak, Lan Zhan clenches his jaw and drops his gaze. His eyes fall onto Wei Ying’s left
wrist, where Lan Zhan’s pale blue hair ribbon is carefully tied like a lucky charm.

“It’s okay, they’ve already decided.” All of Wei Ying’s usual fight is gone and it breaks Lan
Zhan’s heart.

“Decided what?” Lan Zhan looks up.

“Suspension. I’ll have to retake this year, if they decide to let me back that is.” Wei Ying
swallows, looks up and tries to smile. “Might as well be expulsion.”

“On what grounds?” Lan Zhan’s heart is beating faster than when he was sprinting across campus.

Silence, then Wei Ying takes his wrist. “Let’s just go, I shouldn't have dragged you into this.”

Wei Ying steps out of the office but Lan Zhan doesn’t move. He is left facing three men sat in
high-backed chairs behind a broad, darkwood desk.

“What are the grounds for suspension?” His voice sounds separate from his body, as if someone
else is speaking.

A lecturer Lan Zhan does not recognise, sighs and leans forward, “He is not a suitable student for
our department.”

Lan Zhan simply cannot understand. Wei Ying is brilliant, creative, hard working. Why can they
not see it? He cannot stop the truth coming out of his mouth.

“His academic results are second only to mine in a cohort of 217 students.” Lan Zhan states.

“We have multiple witnesses stating Wei Wuxian assaulted three students on campus last month.”

“He did so only to protect me. The students were breaking campus rules, I encountered them and
they became confrontational. I do not believe any of the students were seriously injured by his
intervention.”

Words are hard, but telling the truth to protect Wei Ying makes them come as fast as his racing
pulse. Lan Zhan feels himself shifting into the language and stance of a debate.

“He has a criminal record!” Another lecturer responds, falsely.

“He has a single warning for trespass.” Wei Ying had told him about the incident, and Lan Zhan
knows the facts. “He caused no harm or criminal damage. I can vouch that he has not infringed on
a single law since that warning.”

“Not breaking laws doesn’t prove he has good moral character.” The department head points out
calmly.

“And a single minor infringement is not acceptable proof of immoral character. The burden of
proof does not lie with the accused but the accuser.”

Lan Zhan tightens a fist behind his back, straightening his posture. He stares directly between the
department head’s eyebrows.

“He has attended less than half of all classes this semester!” The first lecturer’s voice is raised.

“And yet he maintains excellent results in assignments. All lectures are recorded, I listen to them
regularly and so does he.” Lan Zhan does not budge, but continues to state his case, just like in a
rebuttal. “I can vouch that Wei Ying has a comprehensive understanding of the course material
which has not been affected by his non-attendance.”

“Of course we have considered these things, this suspension isn’t out of the blue. He’s had
warnings, which he clearly hasn’t taken seriously.” The second lecturer speaks again, his voice is
weary, “He did not even bother to submit his end of unit assignment for my class.”

“Are late submissions accepted?” Lan Zhan waits, shifting his gaze to stare between the second
lecturer’s eyebrows.

Silence.

“Are late submissions accepted?”

“Yes.”

“What is the penalty for late submission?”

“The grade is capped at 50%.”

There is silence while Lan Zhan calculates.

“Even if Wei Ying achieves 40%, he will still maintain a passing average for this semester.”

The head of the department flicks through paperwork on the desk in front of him. He glances
between the two other lecturers.

“Even so, it does not erase the other issues.”

Lan Zhan has already addressed their other concerns adequately. He will not waste breath arguing
with them again.
“What are your requirements of Wei Wuxian in order to prevent his suspension?”

“No further missed deadlines.”

“An 80% attendance rate.”

“No further issues with campus security or the police.”

The requirements come rapid-fire and Lan Zhan has to take a second to process them. Then he
takes a breath, shifts his gaze back to the department head, and nods.

“I vouch that he will meet these requirements.” He says it firmly, daring them to challenge him.

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Ying, through all of this, has not let go of his wrist. He tugs at him now but Lan
Zhan does not turn, he has one final thing to say.

“If he does not meet the requirements, you may suspend me too.” Wei Ying’s grip tightens, vice-
like, and he draws in a sharp breath.

“Please wait outside.” The department head responds calmly.

This cold response starts to drain Lan Zhan of the adrenaline that had been carrying him through
the confrontation. He allows himself to be pulled out of the office by Wei Ying.

He has spoken against teachers at the debate society, but always within a structure, never like this.
The effort and the pressure of the day suddenly weighs far too heavy and things start to feel
unmanageable.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Wei Ying is still holding his wrist. The pressure is grounding.

The flow of words is getting stuck, so Lan Zhan uses another way to communicate. He twists his
arm and grasps Wei Ying’s wrist instead, running his thumb over the ribbon tied there, trying to
express his feeling without words.

“I thought you were angry with me. I thought that-” Wei Ying’s words are blurring together “-and
you hold yourself to such high standards, that I-”

Lan Zhan tries to force himself to process, and manages to form words.

“Not angry. Ashamed.”

Wei Ying’s flowing speech stops short, “Ashamed? Why?”

Lan Zhan breathes slowly. He continues to run his thumb over the ribbon at Wei Ying’s wrist. He
takes his time forming words, “What did I say to you last night?”

“You said…” Wei Ying dips his head and Lan Zhan manages to lift his gaze to see the small smile
playing on his lips, “You said you liked...”

The office door opens and the head of department steps out, “That was quite a speech, Lan
Wangji.”

He nods, not looking at his teacher. This level of interaction with someone other than Wei Ying
feels impossible right now. He pulls his hands behind his back, tightening them into fists and
reverts to his correct, upright posture.
“They have agreed to a trial period. Wei Wuxian, if you can meet the criteria set out for the rest of
this semester and the next, the threat of suspension will be erased.

Wei Ying draws on an uneven smile. “Thank you, Laoshi.”

Wei Ying is safe.

The flood of adrenaline that had carried Lan Zhan in a sprint across campus and spun words out of
his mouth finally subsides and leaves him stranded. Wei Ying tugs on his sleeve and Lan Zhan
gratefully follows him out of the department.

Once outside, Lan Zhan sets a fast pace, wanting to be somewhere quieter as soon as possible. Wei
Ying pulls his phone out as they walk side by side.

“I’m just letting everyone know I’m okay. Cheng-di called me a ‘fucking idot’ twice this morning
so I know he was really worried. Oh I really hope he didn’t tell jie, I don’t want her to have worried
and-”

Wei Ying’s words spill out his mouth, reassuring and distracting him from the world around them.
Wei Ying is used to Lan Zhan’s quiet times now, he doesn’t expect Lan Zhan to reply and that
brings relief in itself. After walking for about 15 minutes, Lan Zhan realises they are headed in the
direction of his apartment. He almost brings out his phone, to text Wei Ying that he doesn’t need to
be escorted.

Then Lan Zhan realises that he really does want Wei Ying to come with him.

That although he needs peace and quiet to recover, Wei Ying is part of that peace for him.

They have settled into silence, their shoulders brushing lightly as they walk together through the
quieter side streets of Shanghai.

He sees Wei Ying continue to text for a while out of the corner of his eye, and then put away his
phone. Wei Ying breathes inward, as if he is about to speak, although he keeps his gaze forward as
they walk. He does this twice before letting out a short, laughing breath through his mouth.

“Oh, Lan Zhan.”

Something in the softness of the way Wei Ying says his name melts the tension that Lan Zhan has
been carrying all morning. Wei Ying brushes against his left shoulder again. Lan Zhan loosens his
left hand and lets it hang by his side.

He holds his breath.

They walk together in quiet, breathless waiting.

Wei Ying’s fingertips brush against the back of Lan Zhan’s hand, gentle as the breeze. Lan Zhan’s
chest is tight and full, as if his heart cannot quite be contained within it. He keeps looking straight
ahead, part of him thinking that if he looks at Wei Ying he will break the spell.

The backs of their hands touch again.

Lan Zhan turns his palm upwards. Wei Ying’s fingers twine through his own.

Held. Safe. Home.

Chapter End Notes

Phew!! Gosh what a lot to happen, but things are certainly happening…

Just a wee note to say not everyone can force themselves to speak like Lan Zhan just
did, and it's not necessarily healthy to expect yourself to be able to. It's okay for the
words just to go, or to be capable of speaking but also needing a break to recover! Wei
Ying understands and supports that, and talking to him is a different thing to
interacting with others!

I loved writing that last bit!! What will happen next?? What did Lan Zhan say last
night?? Wait for next week!
 Clothes
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

They are still holding hands when they reach the noodle stall.

Wei Ying does all the ordering and interaction, squeezing Lan Zhan’s hand when a moped zips
past them. He barely registers its noise, lost in the euphoria of being held. Lan Zhan nods politely
in the direction of the lady who runs the stall then practically pulls Wei Ying into the courtyard
and up the stairs.

To be home, quiet and safe with Wei Ying, feels like a dream. Very reluctantly, he breaks their
connection to untie his shoelaces and then steps into his flip flops. He nudges the new red pair
towards Wei Ying.

“Aw Lan Zhan, now we match.” Wei Ying laughs lightly and kicks off his own shoes. “Do you
want-”

“Shower first.” Lan Zhan responds quickly. As much as he wants to be with Wei Ying he really
needs to get out of these day-old clothes. A shower will give him time to recover properly from the
everything that occured this morning.

There is silence. Wei Ying’s mouth is slightly open. His eyes dart up and down Lan Zhan’s figure,
then to the showeroom door, and back again.

“I will shower first.” Lan Zhan clarifies.

“Oh, oh yeah, yeah of course.” Wei Ying smiles widely and steps back slightly.

“You may begin to eat without me.” Lan Zhan says hurriedly and steps into the shower room.

It is a relief to get out of his clothes and stop thinking for a while. The water is cold and reassuring,
Lan Zhan tips his face upwards and lets the stress wash off of him. After a while, his thoughts
come back online and he relives exactly what just happened.

He held my hand!

He held my hand! He held my hand! He held my hand!

Joyful pressure builds up, lifting him onto his toes. Water droplets fly off the end of Lan Zhan’s
fingertips as his hands shake with overflowing, vibrating happiness. His cheeks burn, even under
the cool water, and lift in an unstoppable smile.

I held his hand.

He breathes through his nose and slowly, gradually floats back down out of his euphoria into
contentment.

He really held my hand.

Still feeling a little lighter than air, and also refreshed and functional, Lan Zhan turns off the
shower and reaches for his towel.
He realises too late that he did not bring any clean clothes with him to the shower room.

The idea of putting on his dirty, crumpled clothes from yesterday is inconceivable.

Lan Zhan blanks for a moment, then remembers his long blue bathrobe hanging on the door. He
pulls it on, tightly double knotting the tie for safety. He sweeps his heavy, damp hair over one
shoulder and tries to untangle his long hair but some knots are too sore, and he has to stop

It is fine, he tries to reassure himself, as he brushes his teeth.

His hair is presentable at least, he can use the comb in his closet for the last tangles. And actually,
the robe provides as much coverage as his normal clothes. The cotton is a little thin but when he
checks in the small wall mirror it does not appear inappropriate. It is fine, Wei Ying surely won’t
mind.

He held my hand. He won’t mind. He held my hand!

Lan Zhan adjusts his robe one last time and steps out of the shower room.

Wei Ying is sitting at the table, chopsticks lifted to his mouth, other hand holding the tub up to
catch the red, dripping oil. He looks up with a smile, then seems to freeze.

Then, somehow, as if his hands have stopped working, Wei Ying drops the entire tub.

A pile of glistening red noodles slides down Wei Ying’s front. And yet, he doesn’t seem to register
it. His chopsticks are still held aloft. He does not take his eyes from Lan Zhan.

“Wei Ying. Wei Ying ?” Lan Zhan is afraid that his friend is having some kind of stroke. He
hurries forward, only to see Wei Ying finally blink, swallow and look down at the mess he has
made.

"Oh...huh..I uh…" Wei Ying clears his throat, "Sorry Lan Zhan, I was just distracted by y-, by
uh…"

"Wei Ying, lift both arms above your head." Lan Zhan instructs. Wei Ying’s speech is garbled and
he is now very concerned by the possibility of cerebral haemorrhage.

Wei Ying is able to comply, much to Lan Zhan's relief, but it only makes the noodles slide even
further into his lap. This movement seems to bring Wei Ying to his senses and he hurriedly shovels
the food back into the tub.

Wei Ying laughs awkwardly, “I’d almost finished anyway, at least I didn’t get any on the new
cushion.”

He shoves the tub back into its plastic bag and shimmies off the grey floor cushion he had been
sitting on. Wei Ying’s top and smart black trousers are completely covered in oil. He stands up,
grinning, apparently oblivious to his ruined clothes.

“Feeling better after your shower? Did it help with your hair? It looked pretty tangled after last
night. I mean, not that you looked bad. Mine was really messy too, took ages to get your ribbon
out. I mean, I liked your ribbon. I like when you wear it. Ahh, anyway, you were amazing back
there. Thank you so much, everything you said was so- and how did you even know I was at the
offi-”
“You need to get changed.” He interrupts Wei Ying’s wittering, even looking at the oil-soaked
clothes is making Lan Zhan uncomfortable.

Wei Ying looks down at himself and does that small awkward laugh again, “Oh yeah, good plan.”

“I can lend you some clean clo-” Lan Zhan begins, when Wei Ying suddenly pulls his t-shirt over
his head.

“What are you doing?!” Lan Zhan stumbles back and turns his burning face towards the wall.

“Getting changed!” This announcement is accompanied by the sound of a belt being unbuckled.

Lan Zhan flees into his closet.

Inappropriate. Do not look. Innappropri-

“Thanks for lending me your clothes, Lan Zhan.” Wei Ying’s voice is far too close behind him and
Lan Zhan is trapped in his cupboard, unable to turn around.

A high-pitched “mn,” is all that he manages to reply.

“I’m guessing you don’t have anything black, huh?”

“Mn-n.”

Lan Zhan scans his very limited wardrobe, very definitely not thinking about Wei Ying. Nor Wei
Ying without clothes on, and certainly not Wei Ying wearing his clothes. In a panic, Lan Zhan
pulls out the darkest, most casual clothes he owns, a pair of navy cotton shorts and a soft, dusky-
blue hoodie. He hands them backwards without turning.

There is a pause of complete silence.

“Lan Zhan, I might also need…underwear?”

This is it. This is how Lan Wangji dies. He freezes, pointedly, furiously thinking absolutely
nothing. After many silent beats, Lan Zhan realises he is somehow still alive and therefore must
take action.

He hands back a pair of underwear with his eyes closed. He remains stubbornly straight-backed
inside the closet. He absolutely does not hear the soft brush of fabric on skin. He opens his eyes
and studiously browses his collection of rabbit books, losing himself in their titles until-

“All done! What do you think, does it suit me?”

Lan Zhan breathes, turns, and finds himself very glad he’s not holding noodles himself because he
is sure he would have dropped them.

Wei Ying grins back at him, hands in the pocket of the hoodie, the hem of which almost covers the
shorts. Lan Zhan manages to nod in reply and bring himself to step out of the cupboard. He
carefully side-steps the pile of dark clothes on the floor at the foot on his bed.

“You know, I could actually get used to wearing this colour…” Wei Ying’s voice trails off again.

Lan Zhan wants to reply that he would like that very much, but his stomach grumbles instead. Wei
Ying bursts into laughter and scurries over to the table.

“Sorry! Sorry, you must be starving.” Wei Ying takes the lid off Lan Zhan’s lunch and snaps apart
his chopsticks for him.

“I need to untangle my hair first.” Lan Zhan never eats until he has finished brushing his hair.

Wei Ying stops rubbing the wooden chopsticks together and looks up. “I could help?”

There’s a pause as Lan Zhan processes the offer.

“I mean, I’m the reason you’ve missed your normal lunch time. And I’m used to doing my own
hair, I promise I won’t tug.” Wei Ying grins up at him with a three fingered salute.

Lan Zhan’s stomach grumbles again. He nods, embarrassed at the thought of telling Wei Ying how
much he likes the idea, and sits quickly down at the little table with his back to the bed.

Wei Ying hands him the chopsticks, then shuffles out of his red flip flops and climbs onto Lan
Zhan’s bed. He sits behind Lan Zhan and gently lifts a section of hair without touching him. Lan
Zhan can’t quite believe this is happening, but he’s glad it is.

“Y’know I always thought my hair was long, started growing it as soon as I left high school.” Wei
Ying starts to card his fingers slowly, pausing to pull at a small knot. “How come yours is so
long?”

“I don’t like people touching my hair.”

Wei Ying’s fingers stop moving and Lan Zhan realises he needs to clarify.

“I don’t like strangers touching me, including hairdressers. Uncle got me special permission to
have long hair at school.”

There is another little pause, then Wei Ying laughs and continues combing his fingers through Lan
Zhan’s hair.

“Ooh Lan Zhan, breaking the school rules! You must have looked like a real rebel, huh?”

“No, I had special permission, all the teachers knew that. I always wore it tied up off my collar, just
like girls with longer hair did.” Lan Zhan tries to defend himself, “The rule itself was illogical,
why should half the student populace be allowed to grow their hair, while the other half-”

Wei Ying huffs a small laugh and leans forward to whisper in his ear. “I am teasing you, model
student Lan Wangji.”

“Oh.”

Lan Zhan’s ears burn and he swallows a small smile, staring down at his untouched food. Wei
Ying’s hand lifts another section of hair from off his shoulder and Lan Zhan’s eye catches on the
blue ribbon, which is still tied around his wrist.

“My ribbon, why did you..?”

“Well, I was kinda having to carry you back to the dorms, and you wouldn’t let anyone else help.
You kept complaining about my hair rubbing against your face, so you took off your ribbon and
tied it up.”
Lan Zhan decides he is never getting drunk again. He can’t quite believe he was so uninhibited.

“I apologise for my behaviour. And for the stress I caused you.”

Wei Ying moves to comb the hair close to his ear and Lan Zhan can’t help leaning back slightly
into his touch.

“Lan Zhan, there’s nothing to apologise for. Seeing you drunk was actually kinda, well it was
sweet to see you so relaxed and talkative.”

Lan Zhan tenses.

“What did I talk about?”

“You said,” Wei Ying’s voice is soft in his ear, “you said that you really like-”

Someone knocks loudly on Lan Zhan’s front door.

They both jump and turn to look at one another.

“Expecting someone?” Wei Ying raises an eyebrow.

Lan Zhan shakes his head.

The forceful knock comes again, even more insistent this time.

“I can open it, if you don’t feel up to talking to strangers.” Wei Ying doesn’t wait for an answer but
hops off the bed. He shuffles into his flip flops and walks over to open the door.

“Where is Wangji?” A voice demands loudly. Wei Ying steps back, glancing over to Lan Zhan
with concern.

It’s Uncle.

Lan Zhan pushes himself off the floor and straightens his bathrobe as his uncle walks into the
room.

Lan Qiren’s mouth is a thin, straight line and his brows are drawn. They grow even more furrowed
as his eyes scan the room, taking in the rumpled bed sheets and his nephew dressed in a bathrobe in
the middle of the day. His eyebrows fly upwards when he sees the pile of black clothes next to the
bed and the blue ribbon tied around Wei Ying’s wrist.

There is an awful, horrible beat of silence.

“Wangji, are you alright?”

“Yes.”

Lan Qiren’s tense shoulders relax slightly, but his eyebrows remain furrowed. Lan Zhan realises he
must complete proper introductions.

“Uncle, this is Wei Wuxian.”

“Ah yes, Xichen has told me all about you.” Uncle seems to come to himself and turns to Wei Ying
with the bearing he usually uses with his students. “I hear you are very able, even beat Wangji in
the rankings a couple of times?”

Wei Ying grins, shooting a wicked glance over at Lan Zhan. “He’s pretty tough to beat.”

“Which high school did you attend? Is your family local to Shanghai? What are your plans
following graduation?”

Lan Zhan starts to relax as Wei Ying patiently completes the screening questions, smiling the
whole time. Lan Qiren nods approvingly when Wei Ying talks enthusiastically about being raised
by his Uncle Jiang.

Background check complete, Lan Qiren smiles slightly and asks, “May I have a moment alone with
my nephew?”

Wei Ying casts him a concerned look but Lan Zhan nods back in reassurance. Once the front door
is shut, Lan Qiren looks up at the ceiling and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“I knew it was bound to happen eventually, but why both of them on the same day?”

Lan Zhan thinks his uncle is being rhetorical and decides not to reply. Lan Qiren takes a deep
breath in through his nose and looks back at Lan Zhan.

“Wangji, you must be honest, are you being safe?”

The question is unexpected and Lan Zhan finds himself stuck for words, not exactly sure what his
uncle is asking.

“Alright, no need to answer.” Uncle holds up a hand and looks away. “I’ve already had this
discussion with Xichen today and that was bad enough. Just- just speak to your brother, alright?”

Lan Qiren sounds exhausted.

“Yes, Uncle.”

“I don’t mind, as long as he doesn’t affect your studies. I want to see both your grade rankings from
now on. And his extracurriculars are fine, but don’t let it become a distraction either. Just because
you got into a good university doesn’t mean you can slack off now.”

“Yes, Uncle.” Lan Zhan isn’t quite sure what he means, but agrees in order to avoid conflict. What
exactly has Xichen told him about Wei Ying?

“And do not worry your brother like that again. If you stay out late, you must text him when you
are home safe. He was so worried when he couldn’t reach you this morning. I know you don’t like
using your phone, but please do not have it off completely.”

Lan Zhan looks down and blinks. He has caused so much disturbance in a single night. And he had
completely forgotten to turn his phone back on.

“I apologise, Uncle.” He makes a mental note to apologise to Xichen too.

Lan Qiren lets out a short breath and nods once. “As long as you’re safe,” he says seriously then
opens the door.

Wei Ying stands on the other side, hoodie sleeves pulled over his hands against the cool air. He
slips back inside and Uncle steps out of the little apartment. He nods formally to them.
 “I will see you both soon, I expect.”

“Yes, Uncle.”

“And, Wangji, make sure you talk to Xichen.”

Lan Qiren gives him an intense look and Lan Zhan nods, still mystified.

“It was very good to meet you, Uncle Lan.” Wei Ying cuts in cheerfully.

“And you, young man.” Uncle replies with a small smile. He glances back to Lan Zhan once more,
then turns and walks away.

Wei Ying closes the door gently and leans against it.

“Phew, he’s kinda intense, huh? You okay? Was he angry with you about something?”

Three questions at once makes Lan Zhan’s mind stumble. He is still processing the cryptic
interaction with his uncle. What had he meant about talking to Xichen for advice? Had Xichen told
Uncle that he and Wei Ying were…?

A light tug on the sleeve of his robe. “You okay?”

Lan Zhan nods in response. He takes ahold of Wei Ying’s wrist and guides them back to their
previous sitting positions, mind still turning over so many thoughts. As he settles down with his
back against the bed, Lan Zhan slides his thumb over and over the ribbon still tied to Wei Ying’s
wrist. The feeling of the soft silk begins to unfurl his mind from its tightly scrunched ball of
tension.

As the stress leaves Lan Zhan’s body, Wei Ying turns his hand so that their fingers entwine once
again. Lan Zhan squeezes once, trying to signal that he is coming back into himself. Wei Ying
squeezes back and it lights a warm spark in Lan Zhan’s chest, warm enough to ask something
brand new, something unprecedented.

“Wei Ying?”

“Hmmm?”

“Will you spend Spring Festival with me this year?”

Chapter End Notes

AH! LQR is getting ahead of the game here, but can you blame him based on the
evidence presented? I know its very common for people to interpret his character as
homophobic, but I’d like to think he was more concerned about Wei Ying raising the
dead and breaking all the rules in canon.

As far as he knows, Wei Ying (according to Xichen) is a top-ranking, polite student

who is helping bring Wangji out of his shell - so what's not to like?? I’d like to think
he mainly cares about his nephews’ safety (hence the lunch-hour dash across the city
to check on Wangji) rather than their sexuality.

So just to be clear, there will be no homophobia or hiding of relationships from

conservative relatives! I’ve lived through that and it’s not particularly fun, so I’m not
putting wangxian through it now!

Wei Ying was NOT ready for the blue robe, wet hair look - did it show??

I hope Lan Zhan’s happy, flappy stimming seemed within character? I feel like he
very, very rarely does this; only when he’s just so overjoyed that it spills out! And
what could be more joyful than holding hands with Wei Ying?! What are your
thoughts??

The Spring Festival invitation might seem out of the blue, I’m sure Wei Ying was
surprised! But for Lan Zhan (and I’m sure he’s not alone - anyone else?), I think a
major holiday like that with all the social obligations, noise etc are a real challenge,
and spending at least some of that time with Wei Ying would make it oh so much
more bearable. What could be more logical than wanting to spend that time with the
person you care about?
 This
Chapter Summary

Pre-note
Here is the playlist Wei Ying shares with Lan Zhan in this fic, in case you’d like to
listen along while you read :)

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/61O7VfKFAtqAqkQLfFeJZG?si=xZ-n-qevQ2-
HU7vkA8xZIQ

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Lan Wangji has been twenty-one for three weeks.

Before his birthday, he managed to do exactly twenty new things. Now, on the deserted metro
platform, he stares at that list on his phone.

Lan Wangji’s List of Things He Did Before He Turned 21

1. Lived alone

2. Switched to paperless note-taking

3. Learned to skateboard

4. Competed in a debate

5. Made a friend

6. Went to a roller derby

7. Edited a video

8. Made a social media account

9. Texted Wei Ying

10. Chased by a security guard

11. Rollerbladed (badly)

12. Held Wei Ying’s hand

13. Provided first aid

14. Took part in a photoshoot

15. Said ‘I like you’ to someone

16. Ate Shanghai hot sauce noodles (la jiang mian)

17. Visited a commentator’s box

18. Got drunk

19. Had a hangover

20. Argued with teachers

21. |

The cursor blinks on the final entry, counting out the continuing seconds of his hesitation. Lan
Zhan has known what his twenty-first thing will be for almost two months now. Since that day
Wei Ying walked home with him, and held his hand and combed his hair.

He just hasn’t been able to say it.

Even thinking of doing so makes his heart beat unsettlingly fast. Lan Zhan stares at his own list,
the inexplicable pressure of things not going to plan building up into stress. He catches his hair
ribbon between his fingers, running them along its length, the smooth fabric soothing his thoughts.

Today. Today he will say it.

As if summoned, a notification from Wei Ying appears in a banner across the top of his screen.

WY: Almost ready to leave!

WY: Just a quick question, which do you think your uncle will like more? My jie sent back some
specialities from our hometown!

WY: [three images attached]

Lan Zhan’s eyebrows rise slightly at the proposed gifts.

LZ: Not the alcohol

WY: Aw but its a family specialty! Lotus flavoured baijiu!

LZ: Even so, Uncle will not find it appropriate

LZ: The local tea and the sesame snacks will more than suffice

WY: Ah fine, I’ll just save the baijiu for the afterparty at your apartment

LZ: Then you will be drinking alone as the ‘afterparty’ consists of only us

Lan Zhan hesitates, worried that his tone is lost in the written text.

LZ: (teasing you)

WY:

WY: (enjoying being teased)

WY: You mean model student Lan Wangji won’t get drunk with me?

WY: Then who is going to style my hair in the messiest way possible with his hair ribbon?

LZ: I would be happy to provide this service, regardless of my sobriety

LZ: (no more teasing please)

Lan Zhan’s mouth quirks with a small smile. He is learning to enjoy Wei Ying’s convoluted jokes,
but once he goes beyond two layers of teasing it still feels a little disorientating.

WY: Okay I’ll give you a reprieve for now

WY: I’m just leaving the dorms, wanna meet me on the way to the metro station?

LZ: I’m already here

WY: WHAT

WY: When were we supposed to meet?

WY: I thought it wasn’t for another 30 mins

LZ: You are correct

LZ: I arrived 45 minutes early

The night of the Lunar New Year is one of the only times when Lan Zhan can count on public
transport being quiet enough for the experience to be enjoyable. Standing on the near-deserted
platform, watching the display board tick through departures and arrivals is far more relaxing than
the idea of arriving ‘on time’.

WY: LAN ZHAN!

WY: Okay, I was gonna share this when we met up but you’ve been waiting so long already and I
can practically see you stressing while you watch the clock

WY: [hyperlink]

WY: You’d better tell me the name for the last track soon, or i’m gonna make one up and I know
you won’t approve

Lan Zhan’s ears heat slightly as he opens the link. It’s a playlist. Around half the songs are
familiar, traditional pieces he has learned on guqin over the years. The others are new to him, apart
from the final track which is his own composition.

The song he wrote for Wei Ying.

Today. He will say it today.

LZ: Thank you, I will listen now

WY: I tried to stick with songs that were chill

WY: Its for when the world is a bit Too Much

LZ: I greatly appreciate your effort

LZ: Now, if you are skating to the station, please focus on the roads and do not text

WY: Hahaha you caught me! Okay see you there

LZ: See you soon

Lan Zhan locks his phone and turns up the volume slightly. The metro platform is completely
empty and he feels safe enough to close his eyes and rock to the music. Lan Zhan allows himself to
become submerged in the music, as if he is sinking into a cool, clear pool.

It feels like no time at all has passed, when he feels a light tug on his sleeve. Lan Zhan waits for
the song to end and then slowly blinks open his eyes.

Wei Ying is watching him with a wide, gentle smile that crinkles up the corners of his eyes.

Lan Zhan switches off and removes his headphones.

“Like it, then?”

“Like it?”

“The playlist, silly.”

“Very much so. Thank you.”

Wei Ying bumps shoulders and lets his arm hang down between them. Lan Zhan’s hand itches to
hold Wei Ying’s, but he is held back by two conversations he had last week.

He doesn’t know how you feel! He thought you liked Mianmian for most of last semester, for
heaven’s sake! If you don’t say something soon I’m going to have to confess for you, I can’t take it
anymore.

As distressed as he was by Huaisang’s revelation that Wei Ying at one point had thought Lan Zhan
was straight, it was a text conversation with Xichen that continues to haunt him.

It’s important to express feelings and expectations when entering a relationship, Wangji. You have
to make sure you both want the same things before proceeding.

And what if Wei Ying does not want what he wants? Lan Zhan clenches his fists and keeps his
gaze on the metro tracks in front of them. Not now. Not yet. He doesn’t seem to be able to find the
words.

“Eh, Lan Zhan? No talking?”

Lan Zhan blinks, and softens his expression slightly.

“I can talk.”

“You were spacing out there, something on your mind?”

“This year’s celebration is different from my normal routine.”

It is not a lie, that part is also causing him stress, so Lan Zhan does not feel bad for diverting the
conversation.
“Ah I get that, it’s different for me too. I gotta say Lan Zhan, I’m glad you invited me. Another
year with Auntie Yu’s relatives and I think she might have actually disowned me, or I might have
disowned her, or some combination of the two.” Wei Ying laughs but he doesn’t smile.

Lan Zhan can’t help but slide their hands together at this, can’t help but squeeze Wei Ying’s hand
in wordless reassurance. Wei Ying squeezes back, but quickly lets go when the metro train glides
up to the platform in front of them.

“Let’s not think about them. We’re going to have much more fun at our afterparty without stuffy
relatives, eh?” Wei Ying smiles and hoists a large black bag onto his shoulder. It clinks as he
bounces onto the train, turning to walk backward so that he is facing Lan Zhan. “But I promise to
be on my best behaviour with Uncle Lan. I’ll play the model student. I’ll be so good he’ll think he
has three nephews!”

The idea of Wei Ying being part of his family brings a little warmth to Lan Zhan’s cheeks. He
steps quickly onto the train and takes a seat, leaning into the backrest.

“You do not have to be anyone other than yourself, Wei Ying.”

He cannot quite bring himself to make eye contact and lifts his gaze to follow the reassuring lines
of the metro map along the top of the carriage.

“Still feeling stressed?”

Lan Zhan dips his head.

“Here, you can have my bag if you like - it’s pretty heavy.”

Lan Zhan accepts the bag, which is bulky, odd-shaped and presumably full of gifts, and places it on
his lap. It is weighty, but not really heavy enough to provide much relief.

“Any help?”

There is a pause where Lan Zhan cannot answer. It is filled by the white-noise rushing of the train
along its tracks. He has started to count the stations until their destination when suddenly the bag is
lifted and his view is blocked as a far greater weight lands in his lap.

“Wei Ying!” Lan Zhan splutters.

“Am I heavy enough?” Wei Ying laughs, shifting so that he sits across Lan Zhan’s knees like a
child being told a story by their grandparent.

Lan Zhan’s face is so warm that it must be visibly red. He has nowhere to hide his embarrassment
as Wei Ying beams down at him. Lan Zhan swallows. And nods.

“Always glad to be of service! You know-” Wei Ying wriggles slightly, laughs again and launches
into one of his usual free-flow stories, words tumbling over each other. Lan Zhan knows he doesn’t
need to respond beyond the occasional nod and begins to relax into his seat. The weight across his
knees spreads a warm, lightness through the rest of him, pressing out the tension that has been
gathering.

Before he knows it, the metro tannoy announces their station. Wei Ying slides off Lan Zhan’s
knees, hefting the black bag again. Lan Zhan walks quickly out of the train and heads up the stairs.
Wei Ying hops on the escalator, facing backwards and leaning against the handrail. He smiles at
Lan Zhan, who slows his pace slightly to match Wei Ying’s ascent.
“Is it far to your uncle’s place?”

“No.”

“Oh good, this bag is getting heavy. You know they made me take my skates off at the metro
security check?!”

“I am truly shocked.”

Wei Ying blinks, stumbles as he reaches the top of the escalator, and bursts out laughing. Lan Zhan
smiles slightly, seeing his joke land well, and continues towards the barrier. Once they have both
scanned their cards, Lan Zhan takes the bag from Wei Ying, lifts it onto his own shoulder and
heads at speed towards the western exit and the cool evening air.

They are already halfway to Uncle’s when Wei ying catches up.

“Phew you really do walk fast Lan Zhan, I thought for a second you were trying to rob me!”

“You said the bag was heavy.”

“Well, you can carry it if you insist.”

“I do not insist. You may have it back if you prefer.”

“I’m not complaining! Go ahead and carry it!”

Lan Zhan is fairly sure they are engaging in teasing. Wei Ying is smiling and walking close to
him. In fact, he shifts closer as they enter the wooded park next to uncle’s building.

“Aiyo, it’s dark in here.”

“The path is perfectly visible.”

“Maybe for you, Mr. Super-sensitive. A normal mortal like me can barely see where I’m going.”

“There is better lighting up ahead.”

“But what if I trip! Or I lose you in the dark! Or someone sneaks between us and robs me.”

“The paving is even. I am the one carrying the bag, so you are unlikely to be robbed. If you keep
talking at this volume I do not believe I could misplace you.”

“ Lan Zhan .” There is a pout in Wei Ying’s voice and suddenly Lan Zhan worries he has missed
something. “You really can’t take a hint, can you?”

He is about to ask for clarification when a movement catches his eye in the shadows up ahead. In
an instant, his hand flies out and finds Wei Ying’s. He pulls them off the main route onto a narrow
sidepath. It really is darker here but he does not stop until they are far enough from the path for
sound not to carry.

Finally, feeling they are at a safe distance, Lan Zhan stops. He does not let go of Wei Ying’s hand.
 Wei Ying pulls up short beside him, his face unreadable in the grey evening light. He laughs, soft
and intimate.

“Maybe you can after all.”

“Can what?”

“Take the hint, Lan Zhan.” Wei Ying laughs again. “Although you didn’t have to drag me into the
undergrowth to do it.”

Wei Ying steps around and suddenly they are face to face. He reaches out and threads the fingers
of his other hand through Lan Zhan’s.

“This is all I wanted.”

The rest of the world suddenly feels very far away, and all the distant noises of the city have faded
into nothing. Lan Zhan swallows.

“You wanted-”

“This.”

Chapter End Notes

I’m going to leave you hanging there for now, but the last two chapters should be up
by the end of the (gregorian) year!! Lan Zhan really is getting into teasing, although I
don’t think he’ll ever enjoy it as much as Wei Ying does!
Has anyone else had to have the intricaies of relationships spelled out to them? I'm
pretty sure Lan Zhan thought, 'we spend every day together, we hold hands, of course
we are together' and it took NHS and his brother's intervention (which I think was
coordinated) to make him realise that you actually need to verbalise these things with
the person you want to be with! This stuff doesn't come with a rule book, its tough!
What do you think Lan Zhan spotted in the park that made him whisk Wei Ying away
like that? The next chapter will have it all and more!
Thank you to everyone who has been leaving comments, every single one is so valued
and spurs me on to finish (and continually expand the chapter limit, I promise the next
two will be the finale!)
Here is Wei Ying’s playlist again, in case you missed it at the beginning:
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/61O7VfKFAtqAqkQLfFeJZG?si=xZ-n-qevQ2-
HU7vkA8xZIQ
Quite a few are love songs but there are also just tunes that are beautiful and I thought
Lan Zhan would vibe with in a lyrical, low-sensory way.
 New Things
Chapter Summary

My friend read the previous chapter and told me it made them think of the song
Something Just Like This, so of course I wrote this chapter with the song on repeat! So
please feel free to listen while you read! https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=fZUfdnmtg4Y

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“This is all I wanted,”

The rest of the world suddenly feels very far away, and all the distant noises of the city have faded
into nothing. Lan Zhan swallows.

“You wanted-”

“This.”

Chest tight, breath frozen on his lips, Lan Zhan is pulled forward. There isn’t even the time to
know who moves first, only that they are kissing. Only that this is what Lan Zhan wants, what Wei
Ying wants.

This.

Hands entwined, lips soft against lips, they are so close together that Lan Zhan forgets where he
ends and Wei Ying begins. He forgets everything but this moment and for an instant the whole
world seems to spin on the axis of their kiss.

Dizzy, breathless, they pause but cannot bear to part.

Lan Zhan feels Wei Ying smile against his lips. They share their breath, and Lan Zhan finds
himself smiling even as every thought flies from his mind, replaced only with the closeness and
rightness of-

This.

“Lan Zhan.” Wei Ying whispers between them, his smile inescapable, infatuating.

His heartbeat seems to fill his whole body and beats a single word from Lan Zhan’s mouth,
“Wangxian.”

Wei Ying kisses the words back into his mouth, “Wangxian?”

“The song, our song,” Lan Zhan returns the kiss, pulling their hands up to his chest, “Is called
Wang-” he moves their hands to rest over Wei Ying’s heart, “-xian.”
“Lan Zhan, ” Wei Ying’s lips wobble but Lan Zhan can still feel his smile, “you soft-hearted-” he
breaks off in a laugh and presses their foreheads together. “You want this too?”

“I want-”

“AAH!”

There is a sudden vice-like grip around Lan Zhan’s waist and Wei Ying’s arms wrap around his
neck.

“Lan Zhan, save me!”

It takes more than a beat for Lan Zhan to realise Wei Ying has leapt onto him, legs wrapped
around his waist like a terrified panda on a tree. Lan Zhan locks his arms around Wei Ying’s back
then looks for the source of the panic.

A short, fat, caramel-coloured dog grins up at him.

“Wei Ying, you are safe. It is a very small dog”

“Are you sure? Don’t let go.”

The dog cocks its head, ears flopping comedically.

“It has very short legs.” He squeezes his arms around Wei Ying, trying to be reassuring. “We could
escape it with ease, simply by standing on a bench or walking up a steep flight of stairs.”

Wei Ying’s face has been pressed into Lan Zhan’s shoulder, now he huffs a warm breath of
laughter. Lan Zhan continues, hoping the imagery helps.

“In fact, a low wall would be sufficient. Or a brisk walking pace, is all that is required.”

Wei Ying is laughing properly now, though he still clings on tightly.

“Shall I walk us to Uncle’s building. We shall certainly be safe there.”

Wei Ying nods against Lan Zhan’s neck.

Lan Zhan shifts his grip slightly and walks carefully along the narrow path, leaning back slightly to
compensate for the extra person he is carrying. The dog follows them good-naturedly, but Wei
Ying does not need to know this so Lan Zhan says nothing. He is just stepping back onto the main
path when someone calls his name.

“Wangji?”

He cannot immediately see, because of the Wei Ying in his arms, but recognises his brother’s
voice.

“Mn.” He replies in acknowledgment.

“Aiya, bad dog! Come here!” Nie Huaisang’s voice calls from the opposite direction.

It's an effort to turn but Lan Zhan manages it and sees his friend kneeling down to hook a lead onto
the short dog.

“Eh, is that you Wei Ying? I’m sorry! I was just giving da-ge’s dog a walk before you two
arrived.”

“S’okay.” Mumbles Wei Ying, his grip a little less tense around Lan Zhan’s neck.

“I’ll go and put him back in the van right now.”

“I’ll come with you if you’d like Huaisang, there’s another route to the garage from here that's a
little faster.”

“Xichen-ge? What are you doing here?”

“Wangji was late, I came out to find him.”

“You left da-ge alone up there?” There’s a rising tone to Huaisang’s voice that might be panic.

“Not at all, Uncle is still with him…” Xichen’s voice trails off.

“That’s what I was afraid of! Please go back up, Xichen-ge!” Huaisang starts to jog away and he
shouts back over his shoulder, “I’ll put this mutt back in the van so you three can get up first. Don’t
let your uncle question him too much, please!”

“Oh dear, I hadn’t thought…” Xichen sounds concerned, although Lan Zhan can’t quite catch why.

“Wei Ying, the dog is gone.” He feels the vice around his waist loosen and Wei Ying slides to the
ground with an awkward laugh. He dusts off Lan Zhan’s shoulders and then takes his hand,
spreading a warm contentment through him.

“Wangji, I really think we should go back.” Xichen prompts.

Lan Zhan nods in response and the three of them set off at a fast pace. They reach the edge of the
park quickly and push through the glass doors into Uncle’s apartment building.

“Xichen-ge, what’s the hurry?” Wei Ying asks, as they wait for the elevator. “Uncle Lan was very
polite when he met me.”

Lan Zhan’s brother’s eyes are fixed on the slowly descending numbers on the little screen above
them. He must be truly worried because his usual social smile does not slip on as he responds.

“You are a talented student at one of the top universities in the country. Your adopted family are
respectable and educated. You even have Shanghai residency. And Mingjue is…”

Something unspoken hangs in the air.

Lan Zhan realises he knows very little about Nie Mingjue, apart from the fact that he works every
day at a market and has a second, part-time job as a coach. Things start to slide into place. Nie
Mingjue might not even come close to what Uncle considers suitable.

There is a metallic ‘ding’ as the doors slide open and they pile in. Xichen holds down the button
for the 26th floor, face blank with concern. In the silence, Wei Ying squeezes Lan Zhan’s hand and
he slides his gaze over to him. In just about any other circumstance it would be impossible not to
kiss Wei Ying right now, they are heart-achingly close. Instead, he squeezes back then steps
forward as the steel doors slide open in front of them.

Xichen keys in the door code and practically trips out of his shoes in his hurry. Wei Ying shuffles
out of his and pulls on Lan Zhan’s hand so he has no choice but to slide out of his without untying
the laces.

They hurry through the apartment after Xichen and pull up short behind him at the door to the
kitchen.

“So you did not even attend university?”

“I couldn’t- I didn’t-” Nie Mingjue has his back to them. His shoulders are hunched as he holds a
large clever, frozen above a chopping board. His voice sounds utterly different from when Lan
Zhan previously met him, choked, uncertain.

“What do you mean couldn’t?”

“I couldn’t apply, I left school when- before I could sit the-”

“You didn’t even complete high school ?”

Nie Mingjue’s shoulders drop and Lan Zhan sees how tightly he is gripping that cleaver. His voice
is strangled when he responds, “I didn’t.”

“Do you know my nephew had completed his Master’s degree by the time he was 23? Do you
realise how hard he worked to obtain his current position?”

“ Uncle. ” Xichen’s voice is cold with politeness, and panic.

Lan Qiren raises his hand in a silencing gesture, “What makes you think you can support someone
so different in trajectory than yourself? Do you think that is appropriate?”

Nie Mingjue’s knuckles go white, “I- I-”

“SORRY!” A high, breezy voice cuts through the tension. “Sorry I’m so late, Uncle Lan! It’s so
good to meet you!”

Nie Huaisang’s words are pleasant, casual and polite, but the force with which he pushes past them
into the kitchen belies his hidden feelings. He positions himself between Lan Qiren and his big
brother, a larger than life smile on his face that does nothing to stop him being dwarfed by the two
older men. He grips a cloth-covered box in front of him.

“I’m Nie Huaisang. I’m sure Xichen-ge and Wangji have mentioned me, they’ve spoken so much
about you and how well you raised them. It’s such a privilege to be invited to your New Year’s
celebration, you know it’s usually just da-ge and I celebrating by ourselves?”

Lan Qiren blinks at this polite but unstoppable onslaught of speech. He is not used to such a
talkative young person.

“It’s so special for us to be included as part of your family. You see, we don’t have anybody but
each other. Da-ge dropped out of school and moved halfway across the country when he heard my
parents passed away. Just to look after a little half-brother he’d never met! He even took over our
father’s market stall to support us. Lan Wangji always talks about how you value hard work, so I
knew you two would have a lot in common!”

Huaisang laughs in a way that even Lan Zhan can tell is forced and toys with the box in his hands.

“I’m not much like da-ge and your nephews, I always tried to skip my homework or call in sick to
school. It was only down to da-ge that I graduated. You know he used to drive me to school every
morning so I had more time to study? And he’d cook all my meals so I didn’t have to waste time
going out to buy food. He never let me skip a single bit of work, I used to hate it! But you see, if he
hadn’t, I would never have got into SJTU, or had the opportunity to make friends with Wangji or
study fine art and preserve our culture’s traditions and skills.”

His hands shake slightly as he opens the cloth-covered box, “Da-ge said this to me, every day,
every time I lost sight of the privilege I had in being able to get an education. I thought, Uncle Lan,
you would appreciate it too. I made this as part of my end-of semester project and I would like you
to have it.”

He unfurls an exquisitely painted paper fan, one side covered in an ink painting of a classical
landscape. The other side has a quote that Lan Zhan recognises instantly,

Education brings confidence. Confidence brings hope. Hope brings peace.

Lan Qiren gently takes the fan and examines it. He breathes in once, then nods.

“Your calligraphy is very fine.” Uncle smiles quietly. “Your brother did well to raise such a polite,
and eloquent, young man.”

Huaisang elbows his brother, who has still not turned around, in the ribs.

“I hope you’re listening da-ge, I’m both polite and eloquent! Uncle Lan says so, so it must be true!”

Nie Mingjue makes a vaguely positive grunt, but still does not move.

“Uncle Lan!” Wei Ying’s cheerful voice bursts the little bubble of tension and Lan Qiren looks to
where they stand in the doorway. “I’m afraid my gifts aren’t of such high calibre, but I brought
some too!”

“How about you all go and relax in the living room, I will help Mingjue with the rest of the food
preparation.” Xichen’s smile brooks no argument and he ushers the rest of them out of the kitchen.

Wei Ying immediately begins talking a mile a minute, pulling all sorts of topics out of thin air in a
way that never ceases to amaze Lan Zhan. Uncle is soon pulled into a discussion of philosophy and
Lan Zhan turns to his friend.

“I saw your final art project this semester. It did not include-”

“Shhh!” Huaisang widens his eyes, “I may have been creative with the truth.”

“Is the fan your own work?” Lan Zhan is concerned by this deception.

“Of course! I made it for your uncle when Xichen invited us to come over for New Year.”

“Then why didn’t you say-”

“That would have been too direct, this approach is more effective, trust me.”

Lan Zhan narrows his eyes, “How much of what you said was true?”

“Oh, at least half.” Huaisang smiles. “Everything about da-ge was true anyway, I don’t have to lie
to make him look good.”

Lan Zhan feels uncomfortable with half-truths, he slides his gaze away, processing. His eyes fall on
the open door to the kitchen. Nie Mingjue still faces away, his shoulders shaking and his head
bowed. Xichen gently eases the cleaver out of his grip and slides his arms around his partner in a
silent embrace. Lan Zhan pulls his eyes away from the intimate scene.

“Keep it a secret between us? I promise I didn’t lie, it was more of a dramatic retelling.”

Lan Zhan nods. He’s already done so many new things today, keeping something small like this
from his uncle seems like a minor addition. He ponders the best, newest thing that he and Wei
Ying just did, heat creeping up from his chest.

“How can you possibly say that!?”

Lan Qiren’s voice is raised for the second time and this time it is directed at Wei Ying. Lan Zhan
hurries into the living room.

“Hear me out, Uncle Lan, the text supports my reading.”

“You cannot twist the text, just to support whatever you want.”

“But does Kongzi not say, When encountering matters of morality, do not yield, even to your
teacher ?”

“You assume that the student in this scenario has a greater grasp of morality!”

Wei Ying smiles dangerously, as if Uncle has fallen into his trap. Lan Zhan’s heartbeat increases
with concern.

“ Seek advice from those less able, those who know little.”

“You do not quote the full excerpt, Wei Wuxian.”

“I still think the point stands, Uncle Lan. The young should have our respect. How do we know that
the coming generation may not prove the equal of the present one? ”

Uncle blusters but Lan Zhan can’t help but smile. Wei Ying must have all but memorised The
Analects in order to talk circles around Lan Qiren.

“You are being selective!” Lan Qiren appears to recover, “Does Kongzi not also say, Being filial to
one's parents and respectful to one’s elders are the roots of one’s humanity! ?”

“Incorrect.”

The word punches out of Lan Zhan before he realises what he has said. Nie Huaisang covers his
mouth and Wei Ying stiffles a laugh. Uncle turns to him, open mouthed.

“Wangji?”

“Kongzi did not say that. It was his disciple, Youzi.” He catches Wei Ying’s eye and a wicked,
electric spark jumps between them. “Perhaps you are being selective, uncle?”

The next beat of silence brings the crashing horror that Lan Zhan just spoke back to his uncle.
Everyone is frozen. Lan Qiren appears to be short-circuiting.

“Alright, let’s eat!” A loud, cheerful voice breaks through the ice and Nie Mingjue appears in the
 doorway. He grins widely, cheeks dimpling despite his slightly red eyes. He wipes his hands on his
borrowed apron as Xichen appears beside him, glowing in a way Lan Zhan has rarely seen.

Their sparkling mood seems to spread to the others and everyone relaxes.

Even Lan Qiren smiles.

“You’ve been studying young man, but don’t think you’ve had the final word.”

“I certainly hope not, Uncle Lan! I look forward to hearing your rebuttal.” Wei Ying retorts with a
grin.

“It seems we will have Wangji as adjudicator. If you believe yourself unbiased?” Uncle smiles at
him and Lan Zhan vaguely registers that this might be Lan Qiren attempting to tease him. It makes
his mind go totally blank. There are really an unprecedented number of firsts happening today.

Wei Ying winks and their hands brush as they walk through to the kitchen table. The wonderful,
buzzing tension does little to quiet his mind as they sit down. Their knees touch, a gentle,
reassuring pressure throughout the meal.

It is perhaps the loudest, most chaotic New Year’s meal Lan Zhan has ever had. And despite
everything that would suggest otherwise, it is also the best he has ever had.

There is only one thing. One final thing that Lan Zhan needs to say.

Then.

Everything will be perfect.

Chapter End Notes

AH!!!!!! I had so much fun writing this chapter. They! Are! A! Family!
Mingjue’s dog is a corgi by the way, I just really love the image of him with a very
tiny cute dog. (I have not named the dog, so any suggestions are welcome!) He’s had a
really tough life and doesn’t show it, but I’m always here for da-ge who cries at any
strong emotion. And for tough Huaisang who uses words as his way of fighting!
Lan Qiren is certainly convinced, I think he’s secretly pleased that his nephews have
brought these three characters into his life and made all their lives a little more lively
and happy.
Wei Ying absolutely started that debate just to gently tarnish his image as the perfect
partner and make Nie Mingjue look a bit better in front of Lan Qiren, cos he’s just that
kind of person!
The fan quote is attributed to Kongzi but I’ve never actually seen it in an original text,
so I think Huaisang was probably just searching frantically online for some quote that
Lan Qiren might like. (If anyone does know the source please tell me!)
All of Wei Ying’s and Lan Qiren’s quotes are from The Analects by Kongzi. Here is a
link to the translation I quoted from: https://b-ok.xyz/book/4188672/e56043
I just wanted to say that anyone celebrating the gregorian new year today, away from
the people they care about or in a different way than usual - I hope you can celebrate
along with the characters and me! Happy New Year! I hope you enjoy the last chapter,
coming up!
 Fireworks
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Lan Zhan wades towards the door through distant relatives. Xichen is by his side, the shield of his
smile dialed up to full power. Lan Zhan nods respectfully without making eye contact with anyone.
He even pushes the backs of his shoes flat, without even bothering with his laces, such is his hurry
to leave. Xichen does the same, smiling and waving as they back out of Uncle’s apartment.

“It is so lovely to see you. Yes, we’d better go down and check on our friends. Please give your
aunt our best wishes. Yes, yes, Happy New Year to you too.”

Lan Zhan turns before the door is even shut and forcefully pushes the down button to call the
elevator. The evening had been wonderful, until the inevitable arrival of relatives which had sent
Wei Ying and the others back down to the park to escape. A cursory round of polite greetings and
exchanges of red envelopes had been necessary, but this was the first year Lan Zhan and his
brother had an excuse to leave early.

The elevator arrives and the brothers step into it in relieved silence, sliding into opposite corners,
eyes closed.

The time it takes to descend is enough for Xichen to recover, “Have you told him how you feel?”

Lan Zhan steps out of the elevator, then pauses to type on his phone. He holds it out for Xichen to
read. His brother scans the lines of text, a quiet smile blooming across his cheeks.

“You’re going to do it now?”

Lan Zhan is about to type a reply when an explosive noise sends his hands flying over his ears. He
closes his eyes against the noise of the fireworks and fumbles for his headphones, pulling them
over his ears and switching to noise cancellation. He gives himself a minute, feeling on edge, then
looks up at Xichen and nods.

His brother nods back then gestures that he is going outside to meet Mingjue and Huaisang.

Lan Zhan nods again.

He’d been expecting fireworks, that one just caught him off guard. He looks back to his phone and
queues up Wei Ying’s playlist. The first song that comes on is Wangixan. Wei Ying has already
renamed it in the time since he left uncle’s apartment.

Seeing the name on his screen unfurls something gorgeously warm in his chest.

Lan Zhan breathes in rhythm with the music.

It is time.

Posture upright, tense and perfect, he walks out into the dark evening.
Wei Ying stands across the park, alone. His back is turned to Lan Zhan and his face is tilted
upward to watch the starbursts of light.

Lan Zhan breathes.

Every breath seems to fill him with the glittering, unstoppable energy of the fireworks above them.

He walks until he is behind Wei Ying, close enough that he could reach out and touch him.

Lan Zhan breathes.

There are few words in Lan Zhan’s mouth, but these two come out easily.

“Wei Ying.”

He turns, a smile growing across his face brighter than the red light that bursts above them. Wei
Ying reaches out a hand towards Lan Zhan, but stops when he sees Lan Zhan lift his phone.

Lan Zhan scans the lines of text one last time. Two months. Of thinking and wanting, of not daring.
Lan Zhan breathes with the music and presses send.

He looks up, more vulnerable than he has ever felt in his entire life. Wei Ying smiles back at him
then pulls out his phone.

Lan Zhan watches him read the text, then read it again and swallow. Then Wei Ying reads it again,
blinking, his lips moving with the words.

I shall love you to the end of time,

Till mountains crumble and streams run dry,

Thunder rumbles in winter and snow falls in summer,

And the earth mingles with the sky,

Not till then will I cease to love you

It had taken Lan Zhan months to find the right words, to find the right way to say them.

It takes an instant for Wei Ying to close the distance between them, throwing his arms around Lan
Zhan, pulling them together into a kiss.

A cacophony of fireworks light the sky above them and even as Lan Zhan closes his eyes he can
see them, feel them in his chest.

Wei Ying is warm and close and kissing him like there is nothing else in the world but the two of
them.

“I love you.”

Lan Zhan feels the words pressed against his lips and returns them.

I love you. I love you.

 I love you.

I love you. I love you. I love you.

Chapter End Notes

The end! Well… I’ve got a few extras up my sleeve of Lan Zhan and Wei Ying’s life
after they get together. They are just a few wee snippets of sweet scenes, plus some
poetry and quotes that didn’t make it into the final draft of the story - so stay
subscribed for those little updates in the New Year!
The poem Lan Zhan confesses with is from the Han Dynasty and its author is
unknown. It is called “上邪” and the English title has been translated in many
different ways, the version I quoted is “Oh, By Heaven” (trans. Yang Xianyi and
Gladys Margaret Tayler). It bears striking (but completely coincidental) resemblance
to lines in a poem by the national poet of Scotland, Robert Burns, so has a special
place in my heart!
Lan Zhan’s non-verbal confession is really important to me, there’s a lot of emphasis
on saying things out loud, but I really think all forms of communication can be
romantic and heartfelt!
Thank you to everyone who read, subscribed, commented and gave me support
writing this. I’ve never written something intentionally from an autistic pov before and
it was wonderful to write a character’s experiences which are so close to my own and
to receive so much positive and accepting feedback. You are all wonderful! Have a
lovely new year and stay tuned for the final chapter of extras!!!

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