Método para luchar contra la impureza (versión católica, o sea, completa)

(Para los que se casarán) En primer lugar, la masturbación y la pornografía crean una adicción que después de
algunos años de matrimonio volverá y manchará el matrimonio. En ese caso, le hombre necesita masturbación
y pornografía para quedar satisfecho, antes o después, su esposa lo descubrirá y esto creará tensión. Incluso
supongamos que los hijos lo descubren ¿Qué pasará con su reputación?.

En segundo lugar, incluso las relaciones (íntimas) del matrimonio pueden verse afectadas por ciertos hábitos:
el hombre se vuelve adicto, entonces él le pedirá a su esposa aumentar la fecuencia de las relaciones. Su
esposa puede tener pena de negarse, al principio, pero no le gustará. También él puede buscar sólo su propio
placer y ella no estará satisfecha, y pronto, ella

METHOD OF FIGHT AGAINST IMPURITY (Catholic i.e.. complete version)

[For future married] First, masturbation and porno create an addiction which after a few years of marriage will
come back and can spoil the marriage. In such case, the man needs masturbation and porno to get satisfied.
Soon or later his wife will discover it and this will create tension. Suppose even the children discover, what will
happen to his reputation?
Secondly, even the (intimate) marriage relations can get disturbed by such habits: the man gets addicted, so he
will request from his wife too often the relations. His wife might in the beginning be shy to refuse, but she will
not like it. Also he will search only his pleasure, so she will not be satisfied, and soon she will get a dislike of
these relations, and by the age of 40 she starts to refuse.
Thirdly, I stress the necessity for the man to love and to respect his wife. I appeal very much to the necessary
dispositions. In the conversation I stress: "making the wife happy", "she must see in you the dream of a man
who loves her more than himself" etc.
These are all only arguments on natural level.
Then I come to the method of controlling the sexual urge. I explain to the boy: once you are married, you
cannot have sex whenever you like: sometimes your wife is not well or tired or has no desire. If you were not
able to control yourself now, you will have problems then. It will be more difficult when you have a beautiful
girl in the house, especially because the marriage relations give more pleasure than masturbation, so this
exercise of self-control is important. Also after a couple of years the sensible love is gone, and soon or later
another girl or woman crosses our way (at work often). Then we will be tempted towards this new girl. If we
were not able to control ourselves, we will fall in sin and do adultery. So, many reasons are there for this self-
control.
Another reason: soon we will have to teach our children. Even if we have fallen in sin at a young age, we want
to prevent our children to have our past problems, but can we teach them if until the night of marriage we were
not able to control our sex urge? If we never were able to stop masturbating, can we teach them not to
masturbate? We will not be credible in our own ears, still less in theirs. They need our example of chastity, so
our future wife and our children need our self-control. If we really love them, we must start to love them now
by saying 'no' to our sex urge.
Now the method to fight masturbation.
1. Avoid all what can create or increase the sex urge.
First: porno, further also looking at girls, publicity. Here I explain the story with "the hot summers" (in the
Western countries) Do you know what is the characteristic of a hot summer in the West? Forest fires: a person
drops a fag (of a cigarette) in the very dry grass, and it starts to make smoke. He could easily have extinguished
the beginning flame, at the condition to do it at once! But he hesitated somehow. Why? Maybe curiosity: he
wanted to see if a fire might start, or laziness: not ready to do the effort to go to the place where the fag lies.
This is exactly what happens in the temptation of impurity: a small attraction to something impure (a picture or
movie, a desire, undressing unnecessarily, a thought on past pleasures), then we were slow in reacting: laziness
or curiosity (main cause of fall!)
Conclusion: it is easier to stop the urge (to Christians we can say: temptation) in the beginning rather than
already started; not only easier. Only when we stop it at the begin, we can stop it. Once someone starts to look
at porno, he will almost certainly masturbate. If not the day itself, a few days later, but it will almost certainly
happen. So, avoid all what is causing or increasing the urge.
Secondly, once the urge is there, use the same principle: react in the very beginning. To non Catholics I advice
the search for distraction in the preferred hobbies and the help to sick and old people; to Catholics we can add:
prayer in time of temptation. This is a good opportunity to repeat the question of our catechism about prayer.
When do we have to pray? Answer:
"Morning, evening, before and after important works, before and after meals, but especially during
temptations". That is the main point. But the problem is that during the temptation we think on other things, not
very nice things, by the way. But at the very beginning our mind is not filled with these "nice pictures". That
time we must reflect on our last ends: "Attention, I can masturbate and get some pleasure, but during the action
I might also die" A few days ago a young sports man died, no? Any time we can die. If we die during
masturbation, first our family or those who live with us will find us, they will organise our burial, but they will
have not much hope during the mass, and indeed, our soul will be damned, loosed for always. We know this,
but we must think on it at the time of the temptation.
Secondly, we must pray. How? Kneeling down and with the fingers under the knees, so that we feel also some
pain. Our Lord gives graces if we join prayer and fasting (penance), the temptation will go. But maybe it will
come back, then do it again because the temptation comes from the devil. If the devil knows in advance that
every time he comes, we do the opposite what he wants, he will be discouraged and run away. He can tolerate
that we don't listen at once, because he has plenty of time, but he does not tolerate one thing: that we practise
the virtue. So, if he knows that whenever he tempts, we pray and practice penance, will he still come?
Rule 12 among the rules on discernment of spirits (consolation & desolation) says: the devil is like a angry
woman. If the husband shows himself weak, she will become more terrible, but if the husband shouts against
her and makes her afraid, he can control her. That is what I told you: if the devil knows in advance that you are
going to do the opposite, he will be discouraged. I adapted the general rule for purity matters.
I repeat: 1. avoid all what stimulates.
2. search distraction in hobbies, good actions, visit to family or friends
3. at the time of temptation: think at last ends (hell, death...)
4. at time of temptation: pray with penance
5. planning of penance: weekly a real fast (by preference Fridays) or at least drop one meal and daily some
mortification on taste or other forms of comfort (putting on fan / heater, use of warm water, way of sleeping...)
If we make the body used to get all it wants, when it asks for illicit pleasure, we will give it also, so we must
make the body used not to get all it wants, even when it is OK.
6. We have also to discover the origin of our urge. Why did we get our urge? Examine yourself. Usually the
temptation starts always in the same way: for some it is looking at girls during the day, for another porno, for
another it is curiosity on the own body, for another it is thinking on pleasures of former sins, for everybody
there is a way, mostly it is a bad curiosity, and sometimes this curiosity is very refined.
One example: there is on TV a film and we know there will be bad scenes. We say: "I only look at the
beginning to look to the girls how they look like; I will close when they start to undress". This shows that our
enemy is an intelligent being: some much false reasoning behind the temptation.
Often we accept to compromise with the devil, then God withdraws, and without grace we cannot resist,
because this instinct is too strong, only with God's grace we can resist.
So, discover your weak place: your soul is like Baghdad, the devil like the Americans. The devil tries to search
the weak place through which he can enter. There you have to put all your artillery (your prudence). An
important example:
When you are in love with a girl, never be with here alone, never, only meet her in public places or in presence
of others. Even I do this because "a blessed candle also burns".
For everybody: never be alone with a girl or young woman, even not with a religious sister!
This is rule 14 in the rules of discernment of spirits, but I adapt them for purity matters: the devil is like a
commander searching the weak place in the city. Through this weak place he will attack.
Last advice: rule 13: the devil is like a secret lover, he tries to seduce the young girl. Even if she refuses, he is
not discouraged, only he asks: please don't tell to your parents. If they know, they will kill him. So also, we
must tell everything to our confessor and / or spiritual guide. If we reveal this, it is humility, the devil does not
like that, also the priest can give us advice.
For the future priest: if you are not faithful in this, how will you help others? You cannot preach chastity to
others. You will not save them, but leave them in their sin. You yourself will be often obliged to administer the
sacraments, celebrate qurbana in state of sin. You will become indifferent and extremely liberal!

SUMMARY
1. Be careful about curiosity, that is the main thing; no porno! No girls-looking, no looking at own organs
unnecessarily, no undressing without need
2. Even without porno, sometimes the desire will come up. That is natural. But in the beginning it will be strong
because of the bad habit; don't worry it will decrease quiet quick; after 2 or 3 months you will feel more free.
After 6 months you will feel a completely different person; you will be more certain about yourself.
When the impulse comes up, distract yourself with something else you like, such as some reading, some game,
go to see a friend (a good one!). Before all go and help a person you know who is in need: an old person, a sick
person who needs some help; if you help another, you feel more responsibility. It is an anticipation of your
duties as a head of a family.
3. Last advice: you must also get accustomed not to give to your body whatever it asks: if your body asks food,
we usually give it as soon as possible; it asks to drink, the same; it asks for sleep, the same; it asks for the fan,
we switch it on (when there is current); it asks for sex, we give it; dangerous! suppose as married man it asks
sex when we are somewhere with another pretty woman! So, control over the body in general, that means in
practice: some fasting is good (also for health)
First for the taste: don't eat only what you like; daily you should do a small sacrifice on the taste: something you
like, you say daily at least once: I will not take it, for example: one day no sugar in the coffee, another day you
get up even when you want to continue to sleep, another day you don't eat the sweet you like. Your mind must
be master over your body. Then you will be able to say no when it asks for sex when this is not appropriate.