THE

SMALL
TALK
TOOL KIT
stop stressing and
start connecting
in everyday conversations
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

02

“THERE IS ONLY ONE RULE FOR BEING

A GOOD TALKER — LEARN TO LISTEN.”

You'll find an oddly small number of things to say in this toolkit.

That's because listening and asking great questions are much better
tools to have.

INSIDE THIS GUIDE YOU WILL FIND:

2 free lessons from my course on

Conversations
Intention: The Sneaky Thing Killing
Most Conversations
O.A.R.R - A Framework For
Conversation
My Go-To "Fallback Questions"
Printable Small Talk Cheat Sheet Cards
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

03

MINDSET AND INTENTION

There are more tradition type tools in this "toolkit" but the first one is
a personal note on the importance of mindset.

If you get mindset and intention wrong, the tools will just sort of
mock you from the sidelines, saying something like, "Even with the
tools you couldn't connect. Just give up."

I don't want that for you. I want you to connect with people

Take a look at the pyramid below and watch THIS VIDEO LESSON from
my course on conversations.
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

04

THE O.A.R.R METHOD

This is the method that I've developed over the last 10-15 years of
intentionally crafting conversations with people. This is quite literally
the mental loop I move through as I talk to people every day. It will
allow you to enter any conversation with confidence that you can
keep things rolling with the dreaded......awkward pause!

Below is an overview of how the method visually looks. It's also kinda
tough to explain in text so I want to offer you the lesson on it from
my course "Conversations: More, Better, and Less Awkward" for
completely free. CLICK HERE to watch the video (the graphic will also
be there after the jump.

If you're short on time, here's a summary type video of the O.A.R.R.

method that I made for especially for this toolkit
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

05

STARTER QUESTIONS
Let's talk starter questions.

For me, it's such a mental relief to know I can fall back on a few tried
and true questions that I can lean on when my curiosity and
observations skill are low or I'm just too dang tired to care, but I still
need to engage (yes, I get there too!).

Below are my go-to starter questions. Steal them with my blessing!

And CLICK HERE for a quick rundown on how I use them.

What are you thinking about a

lot this week?

How are things at work?

What have you been up to today?

or
What are you doing later today?
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

06
YOUR PRINTABLE CARD
A tool is only as helpful as it is memorable and usable. Some
people have written the acronym on their hand, but in case you're
not looking to ink yourself up just yet, print this page and cut out
the attached graphic. Simple print this page the following page
front and back, then cut out your cards!
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

07
YOUR PRINTABLE CARD
SMALL TALK TOOL KIT

08

FINAL THOUGHTS:

Nervous? That's normal. Here's a tip:

Try this stuff on Starbucks baristas, waitresses,
fly attendants, and other service industry
personnel. They're paid to be nice to you! The
chance of rejection is slim to none. Plus: you
probably won't ever see them again.

I'm praying for courage as you do the hard work

of being human and connecting with others. I'm
proud of you just for being willing to try.