Text from my A comment or

How this change

initial WP question I
The Revised Texts: impacts my
submission: (Note received (from
paper:
which WP) whom/where?)

Psychology and
climate science, as
two prominent
WP1: This essay
Allison: The other disciplines within the
aims to analyze
major revision to realm of football,
the distinctions This change
make is in the exhibit significant
between the makes the thesis
thesis. Right now distinctions in terms
disciplines of statement more
it doesn't fully of subject matter,
psychology and concrete and
represent your methodologies, tones,
climate science in complete. More
argument about the purposes, and scopes.
football, focusing conclusive details
difference between These variations
on their respective are added.
the disciplines; be highlight the unique
scholarly
more specific. characteristics of
communities.
their respective
scholarly
communities.

WP1: Drawing
attention to the
differences
between top-tier The main focus of the
clubs like Arsenal, essay is “examining
Allison:
with a Waste
sometimes it could waste management
Recycling Center practices and then to Replacing the
use moire
diverting tons of original texts with
examples and even calculate the
waste from estimated landfill direct quote,
direct quotes to
landfills, and making my
fully illustrate your waste GHG
lower-tier clubs emissions from eight argument stronger
claims
with less football tiers in and more
developed England (Tier 3 - Tier conjunctive
environmental 10)”.
strategies, the
research estimates
the the amount of
waste produced at
the various
football tiers in

WP1: As the
article navigates
through different Allison:
football tiers in sometimes it could football clubs during
use moire
England, from the
Premier League to examples
direct quotes to
lower leagues, it
demonstrates the fully illustrate your Annual number of
claims
varying waste
management
practices within
football clubs.
As the article
navigates through
different football tiers
in England, from the
Premier League to
lower leagues, it
concludes the waste
management
practices within
football clubs: “Total
waste generated at
Adding direct
2012/13 season
ranged from about 2 quote to the text,
and even making my
tonnes to 345 tonnes.
argument stronger
and more
spectators at the club
level ranged from 931 conjunctive
spectators to 114,494.
The waste per
spectator ranged from
1.82 kg/spectator to
6.81 kg/spectator;
mean waste per
spectator was 3.27
kg. The total number
of spectators during
2012/13 season was
9,162,067.”
 Climate science relies
on extensive data for
drawing conclusions,
whereas psychology
employs a narrative
process for result
acquisition. In
psychology,
interviews and
observational studies
are primary methods, Adding a
Allison: explain paragraph
what ethnology tell while climate science analyzing the how
us about the scholars utilize
WP1:\ surveys and data methodology
disciplines similar and differs
collection. Although
both disciplines in these two
incorporate disciplines.
interviewing
methods, psychology
researchers analyze
conversations,
whereas climate
science scholars
examines the factual
basis behind the data.
 When comparing the
scope of climate
science research to
psychology, it's
evident that climate
science encompasses
a broader range, often
targeting entire
countries or global
phenomena, given the
universal nature of
climate issues. In
contrast, psychology
tends to focus on Adding a
smaller groups or paragraph
communities, explaining the
conducting deep characteristic of
Allison: explain
these two
what scopes tell us analyses to uncover
WP1:\ phenomena or disciplines on the
about the
problems within these angle of scopes.
disciplines
specific contexts. Making the essay
While climate science more complete
addresses large-scale, with more
global challenges, analysis.
psychology provides
insights into more
localized human
behavior and
experiences, offering
detailed
understandings of
community dynamics
and psychological
phenomena within
smaller groups.

Exploring the Green

WP2: Exploring
Footprint of Football:
the Green Adding a subtitle
Footprint of C l a s s m a t e : t h e A Dive into Waste
of the heading, so
Football: A Dive header of the blog and Emissions
it could better
into Waste and c o u l d b e m o r e —Why the beautiful
game is not doing catches readers’
Emissions attractive
enough? eyes.
 About Jiuqin Duan:
Jiuqin Duan is a Adding an
Allison: it's not intrduction of the
apparent to the climate science
investigative author in the end
reader that it's a of the blog,
WP2:/ blog on the first journalist and the
author of All making the
read translation fits the
Football's
Football&Environme genre of blog
nt column. better.

Credits: Dosumu et
Adding the
al., “Greenhouse Gas
Classmate: The citation as
Emissions:
WP2:/ blog missing footnotes to the
Contributions Made
citations. text, increasing its
by Football Clubs in
validity.
England”
The mean waste per
WP2:The mean spectator? Hold on to
waste per your hats – it's 3.27
spectator? Hold on kg! That adds up to
to your hats – it's Allison: it's not an unbelievable
3.27 kg! That adds apparent to the Highlighting some
number —
up to an reader that it's a of the key data,
30,146,000 kg of
unbelievable blog on the first making the
waste across the eight
number — read translation more
football tiers. A more
30,146,000 kg of like a blog.
detailed graph of gas
waste across the emissions from waste
eight football tiers. to landfill is shown
below:

Allison: Part of the

blog genre is its Improve the visual
visual appearance; experience of the
people expect Adding images and readers, making
WP2:/ blogs to have graphs into the texts the translation
images and to look more detailed and
like they're on a understandable.
website.
 Allison: The
reflection answers The comment
the questions section is an
posed, but you important part of
could expand on Adding the comment
the blogs. Adding
WP2:/ the visual and section in the end of
it to the translation
formatting the blog.
makes the article
conventions of fits the genre
blogs. better.

Allison: The
reflection answers
the questions Adding the estimate
posed, but you reading time, date
could expand on Making the format
and author in the
WP2:/ the visual and of text fits the
beginning of the blog.
formatting blog.
And decide the texts
conventions of in various sections
blogs.

WP2: The mean Making the tone

The mean waste per
waste per Classmate: A more more interesting
spectator? Hold on to
spectator is 3.27 vivid way could be and more like a
your hats – it's 3.27
kg. used to introduce conversation, so
kg!
the data. the readers don’t
get bored