Second Chance

A story to make you think,

about what you think

Dhiren J. Master
Copyright © 2011 Dhiren J. Master

All rights reserved.

ISBN: 1466216980
ISBN-13: 978-1466216983
 DEDICATION

I dedicate this book to the Supreme Spirit that

created the Universe and all that it is within it.
 SECOND CHANCE

CONTENTS
PROLOGUE: A LETTER TO A DEAR FRIEND ............................................. 1

1 DROWNING......................................................................................... 9

2 ANALYSIS........................................................................................... 23

3 THE CHOSEN ONE ............................................................................. 39

4 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS ........................................................... 55

5 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE ............................................... 71

6 A GUIDE IS FOUND ............................................................................ 87

7 AURAS AND PROPHECY .................................................................. 101

8 ASTRAL TRAVEL ............................................................................... 113

9 HOROSCOPES .................................................................................. 127

10 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS ............................................... 145

11 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS ....................................................... 161

12 SEARCH FOR A GURU .................................................................... 175

13 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION ............................... 187

14 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS ........................................................... 199

15 CULTS & MIND CONTROL ............................................................. 213

16 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY ............ 229

17 WHERE NEXT? ............................................................................... 251

18 FAITH CHURCH .............................................................................. 263

19 SOME QUESTIONS ........................................................................ 277

 CONTENTS

20 THE BLOOD OF JESUS ................................................................... 297

21 LIFE CHANGING STORIES .............................................................. 315

22 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD .......................................................... 329

23 SHATTERED VISAGE ...................................................................... 343

24 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLD VIEW .......................... 357

25 THE UPANISHADS & THE BIBLE .................................................... 371

26 CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME ..................................... 379

27 THE SPIRIT .................................................................................... 389

28 THE TWO KEYS ............................................................................. 403

vi
vii
 PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE: A LETTER TO A DEAR FRIEND

London

Dear Martin

How are you? How is life in Manhattan? What‟s it like being a Partner
at Silverman Brothers – congratulations you deserve it. Last we spoke you
were thinking of moving to Greenwich, a bigger place, a garden and a lot
safer for the kids (has number two come yet?). I hope it‟s all going well.
We are planning to come to see you and Jane sometime soon. Yes, we!
Rita and I are still together and we are getting on better than ever before.
I could say that we were on our second honeymoon.
Look I know it‟s a bit weird me writing you a letter and sending you a
book, especially a book that I‟ve written. Yes I actually got round to
finally doing what I‟ve been talking about all these years. I guess that until
now I‟ve not had the material or the time. It‟s been six years since I
finished writing this book, since then it‟s been moving from laptop to
laptop waiting to be published.
The book is about all the things that happened to me from 1997 to
2003. I wrote the book with you in mind as the reader. It‟s about my
journey from despair and darkness to a place of peace and light. These
days I know that‟s a cliché but it really did happen.
In the course of my journey I have met many people on similar
journeys; I guess to some extent we all are on journeys, some of us closer
to despair and others closer to peace. Some may say that not only are they
at peace, but are also in a state of bliss. With your job, Jane, and children
I am guessing that you are probably quite close to marital, wealth and
health bliss. But is there not another level of bliss or happiness to which
we all aspire that is beyond this, which is transcendent and long lasting?
This is what Aristotle was referring to in Nicomachean Ethics:

‗..All knowledge and every pursuit aims at some good. What is it that we say
political science aims at and what is the highest of all goods achievable by action?
Verbally there is very general agreement; for both the general run of men and
people of superior refinement say that it is happiness, and identify living
well and doing well with being happy; but with regard to what
happiness is they differ, and the many do not give the same account as the wise. For
1
 SECOND CHANCE

the former think it is some plain and obvious thing, like pleasure, wealth, or
honour; they differ, however, from one another – and often even the same man
identifies it with different things, with health when he is ill, with wealth when he is
poor; but, conscious of their ignorance, they admire those who proclaim some great
ideal that is above their comprehension.‘

I disagree with Aristotle that a great “ideal” is above comprehension. I

think we all have it in us to find the ideal that transcends all things. The
problem is that we, or rather I should say I, tended to spend very little
time looking for it, or have looked for it in the wrong places. I believe
that we are all on our personal journeys searching for this ideal,
sometimes actively and at other times subconsciously. Each journey is
different and unique to the individual. I don‟t believe for one moment
that I have found the secret or the only way to get there. For me it was an
accidental journey, it happened in a way which I could have never
planned.
In the last three years I have met so many different types of people with
radically different views of how to live and die. My journey, hunting for
peace and bliss, took me to India, Nepal and Sri Lanka, spending three
years travelling all around the Indian sub-continent from the west
(Ahmedabad) to the east (Calcutta), from the north (Kathmandu) to the
south (Colombo), and all around the coast from Mumbai to Cochin to
Hyderabad then through the interior from Bangalore, Pune to Nasik and
up to Rishikesh. Growing up in the UK, I was immersed in atheism and
hedonism. In India I experienced different eastern and western faiths;
Buddhism, Vipassana, New Age Spiritualism, Reiki, Transcendental
Meditation, Siddha Yoga, Kriya Yoga, Sai Baba, Shirdi Baba, astrology,
Tai Chi, Islam, Judaism, Pentecostals, Methodists and ISKCON (Hare
Krishna followers). Finally I came back to London and started to write
this book.
I want to take you along with me on this journey through these
different places, introducing you to the wonderful and extra-ordinary
people that I met, describing my discussions with them, what I learned
and what it was like. Often I joined them on their journeys, experiencing
what it was like to be on their paths. I believe that this kind of experience
could only be possible in India. I found it so much easier to make friends
there than anywhere else that I have been. Everyone was welcoming and
hospitable, more importantly they were ready to discuss what they
believed and were eager to share whatever they had learnt. They were
2
 PROLOGUE

ready to share anything that could help a fellow seeker get one step closer
to the ideal.
Most of my journey was in India; over one billion people most of who
believe in God. But I soon found out that there are many Gods (some
say that there are as many as 330 million Hindu deities); there are many
ways to worship, many beliefs and many differences. In England we talk
about the weather, football, TV and politics. In India they talk about
cricket, religion and politics; they are inextricably intertwined. God is
never far off from their minds; they believe that God impacts every
aspect of their lives. In India the simple act of eating is highly dependent
on which God you believe in. There are special fasting days for certain
Gods, the God that you are following determines what food you eat,
what time you eat, where to eat and whom to eat with.
Over time I realised that there were seven basic questions which I was
trying to answer for myself. Until I started to meet these people and put
this book together I hadn‟t been consciously aware of these questions, as
they were buried deep inside my subconscious; questions to which I
already had subconscious answers.
It‟s only when I met other people from different cultures and beliefs
that those things that had been at a subconscious level, surfaced into the
conscious realm. I was surprised to discover that there were many
different answers to the same questions. Up until that moment I had
thought that all religions were the same; far from it. Superficially they
look the same but when you delve into the detail I discovered
fundamental differences. Which view point was correct? Can there be
multiple truths? How can one know the truth?
Then I thought to myself, where did my beliefs come from and how
can I be sure that they are right and are they consistent with each other?
It dawned on me that some of my beliefs had crept in from my Dad,
some from school, some from friends like you, quite a lot from films and
TV. I had been brainwashed. When I realised what it was that I believed
in, I was amazed at how inconsistent some of my beliefs were with each
other.
These are the questions that gradually emerged from the depths of my
mind; collectively they form my view of the world – “my worldview”. I
would argue that if you have ever been uncomfortable with what you
were doing, or where you were heading with your life, then there is

3
 SECOND CHANCE

probably some mismatch at the subconscious level in one of the

following questions:

1. What happens when you die?

2. What is it to be happy?
3. What is the purpose of life?
4. How should one behave?
5. Is there a transcendent spiritual entity that somehow influences
your life?
6. Is there a universal truth?
7. If there is a universal truth then how can it be known?

We all have answers to these questions. For me I hadn‟t realised the full
range of answers available and the implicit choices that I had already
made. I wanted to be sure of the choices that I had made, using reasoning
and effort to find out what seemed to be the most reasonable. I felt that
if I did this, I would minimise the chances of getting it wrong. If I did get
it wrong at least I‟d be able to defend my case a little bit better than
saying: so and so told me and I believed them. We will never be sure
whether we are absolutely right. In modern times no one has died and
come back and told us. We cannot use the scientific approach: hypothesis
generation, experimentation and validation, to know for sure what the
correct answers to the above questions are. Each of us has to come to
our own conclusions as to what we choose to believe are the answers to
the above questions. Ultimately, it is a matter of individual belief,
personal faith.
Roshan, a Pentecostal pastor that I met in Ahmedabad, would say that
Jesus Christ did die and come back. But is that just a myth, or did it really
happen? Surely, if it did really happen to that level of certainty wouldn‟t
everyone believe in Jesus? But not everyone does and even though they
believe in Jesus some of them can‟t stop killing each other even today; let
alone when you think about what people have done in the name of
Christendom historically: the crusades, Spanish and other inquisitions,
Reformation persecution, anti-Semitism and so on.
Finally, is one journey better than another? Is there a final destination,
which is superior to other destinations? Can we really know until we have
got there? And even if we do get there, then by definition we have
excluded the other journey paths and destinations. Without directly
experiencing all the possibilities can we really know which one is the best?
I quote Aristotle once again from his book „On Generation and
Corruption‟, Book 1, Chapter 2:
‗Lack of experience diminishes our power of taking a comprehensive view of the
admitted facts. Hence those who dwell in intimate association with nature and its
4
 PROLOGUE

phenomena grow more and more able to formulate, as the foundations of their
theories, principles such as to admit of a wide and coherent development: while
those, whom devotion to abstract discussions has rendered
unobservant of the facts, are too ready to dogmatize on the basis
of a few observations.‘
My experience was very limited and by definition still is. Was I on the
right journey path? Was the end of my journey going to end in bliss or
was there a better happier end point? I really had no idea.
As you know I was born into a Hindu family and grew up in the UK, a
Christian country, being exposed to some elements of Hinduism and
Christianity. I have now realised that I was exposed to a very narrow part
of Hinduism; that which was believed by my parents, and exposed to a
sliver of Anglican Christianity not realising that there were other forms of
Hinduism and Christianity out there. However, the bulk of my exposure
was to an atheistic mind set at school, at university and amongst my
closest friends of which you were and still are the greatest proponent. I
had no exposure to Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Scientology and other
different belief systems. Consequently I fell into the trap so eloquently
described by Aristotle, of having very little direct experience of belief
systems, other than atheism, leading me to have dogmatic beliefs about
other religions based on just a few, predominately superficial,
observations.
I have been guilty of holding such dogmatic prejudicial views. I would
have remained in this hapless state till death. Had it not been for this
serendipitous journey, exposing me to varied belief sets which have
dramatically reduced my level of dogmatism, though not totally
eradicating it. I don‟t believe that it is ever possible to do so, and some
belief systems seem to encourage one to become even more dogmatic.
There seems to be a lot in common at a superficial level between the
multitude of beliefs and faiths. But as I dug deeper into the detail I
discovered a number of differences in beliefs; beliefs that contradict each
other.
The only objective, reasonable and logical conclusion that one can reach
is that all religious belief sets cannot be correct. However, they could all
be wrong. Only on a subjective experiential basis, i.e. by faith, could
anyone reach the conclusion that one and only one of the beliefs is
correct and the others are all wrong. I say this because if it really was
about objective logic and not subjective faith, then by now, once the
“truth” had been explained to us, we would all believe in the same thing.
But clearly we all believe in different things.
If it is all about personal faith then it is impossible to reason logically
with someone of another belief set that you are right and they are wrong.

5
 SECOND CHANCE

So I am not going to tell you what faith or belief system is correct and
which ones are wrong. Simply, because I don‟t believe that it is possible
to prove by logic and reason alone that what I believe is absolutely
correct. Belief is highly subjective and personal and comes down to faith,
choosing what to believe in. For example, how can I possibly prove to
you that what I believe concerning what happens when you die is the
truth? At the very least I would have to die in front of your eyes, for my
death to be proved beyond any reasonable doubt, then for me to come
back to life and accurately remember what happened. Even then, couldn‟t
you argue that somehow my brain was still alive and that I had dreamt my
after life experiences? Ultimately it is not about logic but about faith.
If it is about faith then why bother writing this letter and the book in
the first place? Because I believe that this book will help you think about
what you think and that process will ultimately leave you in a better state.
Perhaps it will help you get closer to the “ideal” then if you had not gone
through the process.
I am not going to tell you what I believe in, or what you should believe
in.
What I do want to do is to share my experiences with you, so that you
may get to know a little more about what it is that others believe (albeit
based on my understanding) and the journeys that they are on. I have
tried to keep things simple and have endeavoured not to become
simplistic. I am sure that you will not rely on my understanding, and I
encourage you to do your own research to verify whether what I have
said is true or not. There are a modest number of references and web
sites which you can explore to find out more.
I have tried to come as close as I can to the objective scientific method,
but I warn you that it is more to do with subjective experience than
objective observation. I have endeavoured to accurately report all of my
experiences. Some of which may sound utterly crazy. But they did happen
and I tried where possible to verify that it was not just simply some
hallucination or phantom of my own mind. However, the sceptic could
dismiss all such accounts if they so wished to do so, an opinion (a
subjective opinion) to which they are perfectly entitled to have.
You will make up your own mind. Perhaps at the end of the book you
will be more convinced that you are on the right journey, perhaps you
will change. I do not know. Either way, I hope that you will be a step
closer to happiness than you might have been had you not read this book.
My journey began, as does the book, with a recurring nightmare in
London about ten years ago. At the time, as you will remember, I had
separated from Rita and was set to divorce her. I had lost faith in the
existence of god. On the two dimensions of happiness mentioned by
Aristotle, health and wealth, I had both in very good measure. However, I
was not happy. This in itself troubled me, because what else was there
6
 PROLOGUE

that I could strive for on my own merit? Neither earning more money
nor getting any fitter, not even more sex or recreational drugs (I tried that
to!) was improving my level or rather lack of happiness. I started to see a
psychotherapist and began to research the nature of the human mind and
emotions.
I can‟t resist sharing two more quotes with you which summarize what
happened next, and may help to set you in the appropriate frame of mind
to read this book.

‗The goal toward which Western society moves is the Civilization of the Dialogue.
The spirit of Western civilization is the spirit of enquiry. Its dominant element is
the Logos. Nothing is to remain undiscussed. Everybody is to speak his mind. No
proposition is to be left unexamined. The exchange of ideas is held to be the path of
realization of the potentialities of the race.‘

Robert Hutchins (1952), The Great Conversation

‗Where there is much desire to learn, there of necessity will be much arguing, much
writing, many opinions; for opinion in good men is but knowledge in the making.‘

Milton (1644), Areopagitica

There may be many things that I have written with which you may
disagree. The book is intended to provoke and cause debate. Let us be
mature and confident, and not leave any matter undiscussed! Give me a
call when you‟ve finished the book or email me
arjuna@secondchancethebook.com . Let‟s fix up a date for Rita and me
to come and see you and Jane.
Sorry for such a long intro, there was a lot to write about – wait until
you get into the book.

Yours in friendship always

Arjuna

7
SECOND CHANCE

8
 1 DROWNING

Beams of light from a bright full moon broke through the sombre
clouds masking the night sky. The moon rays focused on a solitary figure
dressed in white, running across the grassland. The moon beams looked
like a searchlight, as the shifting clouds directed the rays, almost perfectly
tracking the young man‟s flight across the meadows. It wasn‟t clear what
the man was running from, all that could be heard were his heavy gasps
of breath and the thudding of his feet on the soft grass. The man slowed
down. Now you could see his face dripping with beads of sweat,
scrunched up with pain and fear, his hands on his hips attempting to
steady himself. He was startled by the distant sound of angry voices
coming towards him. He started running. Almost immediately his legs
buckled, as they lost their grip on the wet grass. The voices were getting
closer and louder. He still couldn‟t see them, but could hear four maybe
six angry men shouting. The ground dipped suddenly, he just managed to
stop himself from tumbling uncontrollably into the water below. He tried
to push the long water reeds to the side, as he waded into the water, but
the reeds kept springing back whipping his face. His feet started sinking
into the sludgy lake floor, his wet clothes weighing down on his
weakening legs. The mob caught up. They were on top of him pushing
his head down into the murky water, his arms thrashing ineffectively
against his assailants.
That‟s when I woke up, jerking upright from my sleep, struggling for
breath. The bedroom was filled with the sound of my wheezing; the
passageways in my lungs had shut tight, suffocating tight. I stretched out
my right hand fumbling for a Ventolin inhaler, put it in my mouth and
tried to breathe in whilst simultaneously pushing down on the pump. The
first attempt failed, I involuntarily spewed out the medicinal vapour from
my lungs. I kept on trying, each time making steady headway. On the
9
 SECOND CHANCE

fourth attempt I managed to keep the reviving spray inside, long enough
to penetrate deep into my lungs. The wheezing subsided. The panic was
over. I switched on the light so that I could see the time: 3:58am.
My body was covered with perspiration, the bed sheets were damp. I
bent forward for the towel lying at the foot of the bed, got out of the
sheets, sat on top of the duvet, and rubbed myself dry. Through the
bedroom window I could see the full moon just like the one in the dream.
I was tired and lonely. I slumped down and rested my head in the cup of
my hands pressed against my bent knees.
My thoughts went back four years earlier to the first morning of my
married life; the breakfast table at The Oberoi in Mumbai. I had selected
the table with the best views of the Arabian Sea lapping gently against the
Marine Drive sea wall. I was about to devour an oversized masala dosa.
Rita‟s plate was empty. The curls of her dark shoulder length hair rested
gently on her shoulders, the summery dress with bright red and yellow
flowers hugging her curvaceous body. She was looking down at the white
table cloth, her arms resting on the table, her slender fingers clasped
around a glass of orange juice.
„Aren‟t you going to eat anything?‟ I asked her.
Rita continued to look down at the table. I couldn‟t see her face. I
remember holding out my hand, tenderly placing my fingers under her
chin delicately tilting her head so that I could see into her beauteous
brown eyes. As her head lifted up, a teardrop dislodged from her watery
eyes and gently trickled down her right cheek.
„What‟s the matter?‟ I asked.
„Nothing,‟ said Rita. Her normally sweet melodic voice was replaced by
a trembling hesitant whisper.
„Aren‟t you feeling well?‟ I asked again.
„Don‟t you remember what happened last night?‟ replied Rita.
„What do you mean?‟
„You didn‟t tell me that you had nightmares.‟
„I don‟t have nightmares.‟
„Last night you got up shouting, waving your arms. You hit me.‟ She
brushed aside her hair, to reveal a small slightly red blemish on her left
cheek.
I remembered staring at the bruise on Rita‟s face.
„I didn‟t know what to do. I‟d never seen you look like that. I was
terrified. I didn‟t know what to do. I just hugged you, until you calmed
down.‟
„Something was disturbing me, and I‟m not sure, but I think I got up. I
just don‟t remember what I was dreaming. I would never mean to hurt
you,‟ I replied.

10
 DROWNING

Had I had the same dream again tonight? It was haunting me. Could I
have hit Rita whilst trying to fight off the phantom mob that was trying
to drown me?
Now I was alone and there was no Rita. I wiped the tears from my eyes,
stretched out and let my head drop on the pillow. My tired eyelids were
soon shut; my breathing back to normal. I turned from one position to
the next, trying to get comfortable. Perhaps it was too hot. I got up and
opened the window. It was still and calm outside. Inside my head it was
anything but still and calm.
At 6:00 the alarm went off. I reluctantly got out of bed and went into
the bathroom. It was the same routine each morning, quickly brush my
teeth, shave, shower and get dressed. Then into the kitchen, which was
small and compact, gaze out the window to see the early risers walking to
Gloucester Road tube station. A strawberry fromage frais, a croissant,
some coffee, a fistful of vitamins, minerals and anti-oxidants and I was
ready to leave for work.
It was Monday. Maria the cleaner was due. I took out two crisp £20
notes, swiped a blank A4 paper from the inkjet printer sitting under the
computer in the corner of the room and wrote a note: „Dear Maria, Please
find £40 for last month. I am away next week, no need to come. Regards
Arjuna.‟ I lifted up the glass vase, resting in the centre of the replica
antique dining table, and placed the note together with the money
underneath it.
I galloped down the four flights of stairs to the mews side road where
my BMW M3 was parked. I opened the door, flung my jacket onto the
passenger seat, banged shut the door, turned the starter key and sped off
down the mews all 350 throbbing destructive brake horse power
thrusting me onto the A4, out of the city. Six seconds later I was doing
60mph whilst still in second gear. My foot full on the accelerator one
moment and then off the next, slamming on the brake pedal to stop for
the many red lights. The halt at the traffic lights gave me enough time to
slot in the Ibiza Anthem CD, its thumping techno beat smothering the
scream of the high octane revving engine.
Big Group Plc‟s headquarters, where I worked, was along the M4 about
20 miles past Heathrow Airport. At this time of the morning, heading
against the traffic, the roads were relatively clear allowing me to
experience the full power of the M3. By 7:30, I was cornering the sharply
banked slip road taking me off the motorway into the business park
where Big Group was located. The tyres screeched, attempting to keep
grip on the slippery road, as I turned the hairpin bend. As I came around
the bend, I saw a car upside down on the grass verge lying on its
crumpled roof sandwiching a completely smashed windscreen. Two
paramedics were taking the ragged remains of the unfortunate driver into
the ambulance, his face covered.
11
 SECOND CHANCE

A gust of wind blew away the cloth, unmasking the corpse and
revealing not a stranger, but my own bloody lifeless face. I took my foot
off the accelerator, and leaned forward to switch off the CD, tears
streaming down my face. I just wanted to die. I wished it had been me
and not someone else lying dead. It would all be over, the pain, the
unhappiness, the futility of a pointless, hollow vacuous existence.
I parked next to Chris, my boss‟ car, a blue Jaguar XK40. I felt like crap.
Perhaps if I acted as if everything was great, everything would be great. I
deliberately strutted through the revolving doors, gave a quick
enthusiastic good morning to the security guard, and sprinted up three
flights of stairs, two at a time, to the top floor where the office was
located, the lift being too slow. It was working. I was feeling better no
one would be able to tell how I really felt.
I needed another coffee. I would often go to the coffee machine before
settling in at my desk. I had to walk past Chris‟ office to get to my office.
The door was open. Chris was in his late forties, a little plump around the
waist, wearing half rimmed reading glasses which didn‟t suit his boyish
features. He was busy reading through his emails and briefing papers.
„Can I come in?‟ I asked.
„Course you can, do you want a coffee?‟ replied Chris as he got off his
chair, walked around his desk and sat down on a small green three seater
sofa. He motioned me to sit down next to him.
„How are things?‟ asked Chris.
„Oh, yes. Fantastic. Couldn‟t be better,‟ I lied, my head bowed down
looking at the wooden floor.
Chris looked at me, poured a coffee out of the coffee pot, and started
to slowly sip it.
„I‟m off to Italy tomorrow, just for the day to see how the team‟s
getting on with the acquisition. I want to check that they have completed
a thorough due diligence, you know how tricky those Italian accounting
rules can be. That‟s this week. Then next week, Wednesday, I am off to
Rio to facilitate a three day workshop with Victor and his team to help
them decide which acquisitions they should focus on.‟ I said breaking the
brief silence.
„Sounds like you‟ve got it under control. Let me know if you need me to
do anything.‟
„I‟ve got it covered,‟ I replied confidently.
„Anything else?‟ asked Chris.
„No,‟ I got off the sofa and headed towards the door.
Just before I got to the door, I turned around and said.
„Oh yes, there is one more thing.‟
„Yes what is it?‟
„Will it be okay, from next week on, for me to come in slightly later on
Tuesdays and leave a little earlier on Thursdays?‟
12
 DROWNING

„Well as long as you get your work done. I trust you. You‟re responsible
enough. Is anything the matter?‟
„No. Everything‟s fine,‟ I replied. I stood there at the door, wondering
whether to tell Chris or not. „Well you know that Rita and I split up last
month.‟
„Yes I heard.‟
„We went to a counsellor before we split up to see whether there was
anything that we could do to salvage the marriage.‟
„And..‟ said Chris encouragingly, seeing that I was having difficulty in
talking about this.
„The counsellor advised us there and then that we should separate and
that I should move out.‟
„Was that the first session?‟
„Yes it was‟
„A bit premature to make such conclusions so quickly, wasn‟t it?‟ asked
Chris who was no longer relaxing on the sofa but sitting on the edge of
the seat listening attentively.
„It was such a relief to find somebody who really understands. We were
arguing all the time and I‟d tried everything. I even read „Men are from
Mars, and Women are from Venus‟, but it was no use.‟
„Is that why you‟re living in Kensington now?‟
„It‟s great to be single again. I just felt so pressured around Rita - you
know what I mean.‟
„Well marriage can be difficult at times, Clare and I have had our tough
times too, but we always got through it. Be careful of people who are
quick to give advice,‟ cautioned Chris.
„I‟m sure Clare loves you Chris. Rita doesn‟t love me, I really don‟t
think that she ever did,‟ I replied.
„Are you sure of that, Arjuna?‟
„Yes I am. This counsellor‟s a professional. A friend of mine who‟s also
a psychologist had suggested him. He comes highly recommended.
Anyway this counsellor, Rupert, suggested that I come and see him twice
a week to help me get through this. He‟s a trained psychologist and I‟m
planning to see him on Tuesday mornings and Thursday late afternoon.‟
„Is he charging you for this?‟
„Yes, of course. Why wouldn‟t he?‟ I asked, slightly puzzled by Chris‟
question.
„Well, by telling you to split up with Rita he‟s landed himself a
potentially very lucrative patient.‟
„I‟ll only see him for a couple of weeks. It‟s not going to take long to get
myself sorted out.‟
„I hope you‟re right. Good luck for Italy and Brazil. You can debrief us
on how you got on, in a fortnight‟s time at our next Management Team
meeting.‟
13
 SECOND CHANCE

„Thanks Chris for being understanding. I‟ve got a lot to prepare for
Italy.‟
„Yes. You better get along. I‟m always here if you need to talk about it.‟
„Thanks. I really appreciate it.‟
„You‟re welcome.‟
The rest of the day went quickly. I had several meetings during the day
with Treasury, Legal and PR departments all concerned with the
proposed acquisition in Italy. In between meetings, I was busy scanning
for urgent emails and preparing a check list together with an agenda for
my next day‟s session in Milan. At about four o‟clock my mobile started
ringing.
„Hello, Arjuna speaking.‟
„Arjuna. Hi, it‟s Martin. Are we still on for tonight?‟
„Shit! Is it tonight? I thought it was next week.‟
„Haven‟t you got it on your pocket PC thing, I thought you were
organised.‟
„Sorry Martin. It‟s just that things have been a bit busy at work.‟
„Look. Are we still on for tonight? ‟
„Yes I can make it, might be a little late and I‟ll need to leave early. I‟ve
got a 7:15 flight tomorrow morning to Milan.‟
„Stop making excuses, get your arse into gear and get down to The Blue
Anchor by 7:30 – and by the way the drinks are on you.‟ With that Martin
disconnected the phone.
I quickly finished the check list, downloaded all the necessary files onto
my lap top and headed to the Blue Anchor pub in Hammersmith to meet
with Martin.
The Blue Anchor backed onto the Thames next to Hammersmith
Bridge. I found Martin sitting outside looking across the river at our old
school, St Paul‟s. Martin was wearing a dark blue and white striped
double cuff shirt, beige double pleat trousers with turn ups, and a pair of
well polished full brogue brown leather shoes. His blonde hair was
beginning to thin and recede on both sides of his temple. At six feet
Martin was a little taller than me, but had the same athletic build looking
fitter than the average 33 year old.
„I see you‟ve already got a drink. I got held up in traffic. I‟ll just get
mine.‟ I said.
„This will be finished soon. Get me another IPA and a bag of Cheese
and Onion.‟ Martin spoke in a deep baritone voice, clearly enunciating his
words, people said that we sounded very similar to one another. Martin
would have easily got a job as a BBC newscaster.
I returned with Martin‟s pint of IPA, a bag of crisps and a bottle of
Corona with a wedge of lime sticking out of it.
„Who‟s that poofy drink for?‟ teased Martin pointing at the Corona.
„Piss off! How long are you back from New York for?‟
14
 DROWNING

„Just a week. I‟m back for our twenty year school reunion.‟
„Oh that. I‟m not going.‟
„It‟ll be great. Ollie, Russell, Nick, Steve, Johnny and Patrick they‟re all
going to be there.‟
„I don‟t know.‟
„Are you wearing contacts? It looks a lot better than those awful specs
you used to wear.‟
„No, I had corrective laser surgery done when I was in Sao Paulo Brazil
working on that billion dollar acquisition last year. I think they call it
Lasik. Its great not having to wear glasses anymore.‟
„It works does it? Anyway how‟s it going? How‟s Rita, where is she? I
thought that you‟d bring her. Now I‟ve got to talk to you all evening.‟
„It‟s over between us. We split up, it‟s finished.‟
„Hey, look I didn‟t know. Sorry. How is she?‟
„I don‟t know, I haven‟t spoken to her or seen her in weeks. I‟ve rented
a flat in Kensington.‟
„When did this happen? You two looked so great together, she seemed
perfect for you‟
„That‟s what I thought too. It‟s been building up for a long time.
Perhaps she never loved me.‟
„How can you say that? She looked so happy when we saw her at the
wedding. I can‟t remember her ever not smiling. I just can‟t believe it.‟
„Well looks can be deceptive. She fooled me for a long while, she fooled
everyone except Rupert.‟
„Who the hell is Rupert?‟
„He‟s the marriage counsellor who straight away saw through Rita and
advised us to split up.‟
„Some counsellor!‟
„Whose side are you on?‟ I asked. It always upset me talking about Rita.
„Yours of course. It‟s just difficult to take it all in, I liked Rita and you
two just looked great together. Look I‟m sorry. If you don‟t want to talk
about it, that‟s fine with me.‟ Martin put his arm around me and gave me
a hug.
„Yeah I know. Talking helps. I don‟t think that she ever loved me. The
whole thing was arranged. Her uncle knew my Dad from Nairobi. Her
parents wanted her married off quickly, her Uncle called my Dad
proposing a match. Rita just went with what her parents wanted.‟
„What neither of you had a choice? ‟
„No it wasn‟t like that. Those kind of arranged marriages don‟t take
place any more. Rita‟s uncle proposed that we meet and check each other
out. I dated her a few times. You met her on our third date in Hampsted.
Do you remember?‟
„At that Mexican place?‟
„Yes that‟s right.‟
15
 SECOND CHANCE

„That was only your third time together? ‟

„Yeah. I thought that she was the one. Rita fitted nicely into that
mansion in the country, with its gravel driveway encircling the large water
fountain and the three kids; you know the dream that I keep on going on
about. She was Miss Right. I was certain. That‟s why we got married so
quickly.‟
„So what went wrong?‟
„I don‟t know. We argued all the time. I was never good enough for her,
nagging all the time. It‟s simple, she never ever loved me. She was just
keeping her parents happy. You know how traditional she is.‟
„Yes I know. But I thought that‟s what you liked about her. You know
getting in touch with your roots and all that. Didn‟t you tell me that?‟
„You‟re right. But the whole thing was doomed.‟
„What do you mean?‟
„Mum‟s very superstitious, so she checked our horoscopes with the
astrologers to see if they matched and fix the best day to get married.
Check with the Gods that everything was okay.‟
„So your Mum went to Russell Grant?‟ laughed Martin.
„Look Martin this is serious.‟
„Sorry, but it sounds crazy‟
„Our horoscopes matched. But the astrologer told us that it wasn‟t a
good year to get married. I couldn‟t wait. I thought the whole thing was a
load of crap. Anyway my Mum kept on going to see different astrologers
until she met one, who said it would be okay for us to get married
provided we did this special ceremony to appease the Gods.‟
„Oh yes.‟
„Yes and he charged us a £1000 for it.‟
„He suckered you and your Mum.‟
„I thought it was a load of crap, but I wanted Mum to be happy so I
went along with it. Anyway perhaps the other astrologers were right and
we should have waited.‟
„You don‟t really believe that do you?‟
„I didn‟t. But now I don‟t know. I used to pray; now I don‟t. Did
anyone or anything ever listen to my prayers? I thought that something
was listening to them. But I‟m not sure, things are such a mess. Perhaps
there isn‟t anything up there. Does anybody really know?‟
„God and religion are a load of twaddle. Have you heard of Immanuel
Kant?‟
I stared back at Martin, wondering where he was going with this
question.
„Kant, do you know who he is?‟
„Yes, but I don‟t know what he wrote. That‟s what you layabouts
studying PPE at Oxford spent your time doing. I did a real subject.‟

16
 DROWNING

„At least I learnt something useful about life at Oxford, not like you
uncultured Cambridge Engineers,‟ retorted Martin.
„Get on with it, what about Kant?‟
„Well Kant reasoned that the gods were just a convenient imagination
for us to pin our sense of guilt. That‟s what you are doing. I‟ll email the
quote to you. I can‟t remember it off hand. God doesn‟t exist. You‟ve got
to just get on with things.‟
„You‟re talking like Gordon Gekko. You‟ve been too long at Silverman
Brothers, they‟ve got to you.‟
„Gekko?‟
„You know, Michael Douglas played that real sleaze bag called Gordon
Gekko in that film Wall Street. That „Greed is Good‟ speech?‟
„Ah yes. Greed can be good. At least Gordon was honest about what he
wanted. You‟re more like Gordon than me. You even have the same hair
style, with your hair gelled back like that, and aren‟t you the one helping
Big Group suck up everything around it. I don‟t see you complaining
about how much you‟re getting. Greed‟s great, it works, it helps the
economy. Money does make the world go around. Everyone‟s greedy
they‟re just not honest with themselves. At least Gekko was honest. He
wasn‟t a hypocrite.‟
„Maybe, you‟ve got a point. Look I‟ve got to go, and get ready for
Milan.‟
„I‟ll see you at the reunion weekend. It‟ll take your mind of things.
You‟ll enjoy it.‟
„I‟ll think about it,‟ I hollered back as I walked towards my car.
The £40 and the note were gone. The kitchen was cleaned, and the
bedroom neat and tidy. My crisply ironed shirts hung on the outside of
the wardrobe door. I smiled as I put them into the wardrobe. I was
exhausted, I was soon fast asleep. I woke up at 0500. I seemed to have
this uncanny habit of getting up at precisely the right time when it
mattered most: a plane to catch, important event, that sort of thing.
The flight was delayed several hours, mechanical problems, getting me
into Milan at 11:30. It was a hectic day with back to back meetings. I had
asked my secretary to book me into the Duce Palace and change my
flight to the first one in the morning. I could use the time to get to know
the Italian team a little better. Besides I loved the Risotto al Funghi
accompanied by a vintage Chianti served at the Michelin rated hotel
restaurant.
It was nearly midnight by the time dinner and all the speculative gossip
was over. The talk was about who was going to be fired in the next re-
organisation and how long it would be before Chris took to become the
next CEO of Big Group. I got into the room, lay on the bed and
switched on the TV tuning into BBC World. The hourly news was
heralded by the latest catchy tune and slogan „Making Sense of It All‟.
17
 SECOND CHANCE

As always the news was disturbing. This time, the Roman Catholic
Church in the US issued a public apology for some 4500 priests who had
molested over 11,000 children over a period of 50 years. Next, a special
report on the 16 million people butchered in West Africa as a result of
various conflicts in the last 20 years. Then, an investigation discovering
death camps in Zimbabwe, where one teenager had been gang raped
seven times in one night and her 11 year old roommate raped on a daily
basis for over a year. In the same place a hardened sixteen year old, a
graduate of these death camps described the utter joy of listening to the
screams of mercy as he tortured innocent victims. Next it was coffee
growers in the poorest parts of the world getting less than their cost of
production for coffee, due to massive over supply.
After the news was HardTalk an interview with Alec Baldwin,
Hollywood tough man, calling for more armed security in the US, on
planes, on trains, on street corners, in Starbucks. So the list went on.
I picked up my mobile and dialled Martin‟s number. It went through to
voicemail.
„Martin, hi, Arjuna here. This world‟s a total mess. Maybe you‟re right,
how can there be a God allowing all this shit to happen to innocent
people. Look I‟ve decided. I‟ll see you at the re-union. Don‟t forget to
send the email. Send it to arjunaa@hotmail.co.uk. Ciao.‟
The rest of the week sped by as I busied myself with the Italian
acquisition and preparing for the Brazilian strategy workshop.
Saturday, the 20 year school re-union. I wanted to be alone; I quickly
separated myself from Martin and the rest of the group, and headed
towards the sports gym. I climbed up the steps to get to the viewing
gallery. I put my arms on the railing and bent over looking intently down
onto the wooden boarded gym floor. Just standing there in silence,
thinking back to what had happened over 20 years ago.
„There you are. I wondered where you got to. I was about to give up
looking for you. What‟s up with you?‟ asked Martin as he came towards
me.
„I hate this place.‟ I shot back.
„What?‟ said Martin, seemingly not quite hearing me.
I continued looking down at the gym floor. My thoughts went back to a
cold winter‟s day, when I was twelve. It was the interclub indoor athletics
day held in the school gym. I wanted to do my bit for my club and fit in
with everyone else, „C‟ club. It was my first race for the club. The whole
school would remember my athletic prowess; my emphatic victory. What
a way to start my school career at St Paul‟s. I had put myself down for the
sprint shuttle. There was a mistake and somehow I‟d been entered for the
ten lap steeplechase. The race started, I sprinted to the front of the pack.
Perhaps I could win this race. Then the hurdle came and I was unsure
how best to get over it. I misjudged the height. My shin hit the bar as I
18
 DROWNING

toppled over it, grazing my knee, my specs flying right in front of where
the rest of the pack was heading. Crunch. One of the runners stepped
and cracked one of the glass lenses. A large bruise had formed on my
shin. I was on my hands and knees groping for my specs. I put them on
and started running, pain shooting up my leg. All I could hear was the
crowd laughing at me. I continued running, now I was right at the back
of the pack. I couldn‟t see clearly through the cracked lens. The next lap
and the same dreaded hurdle. I hit the bar a second time and fell again,
specs flying further, the laughter increased. Blood was dripping from my
gashed shin. I was disheartened, thinking about the eight more
excruciating laps to run. The pain was getting worse, by the eighth lap I
was merely hobbling around. I could hear them behind me, I was about
to be lapped, the humiliation. That was when I started to have trouble
breathing, I was starting to wheeze. I didn‟t want to be lapped and I
remember summoning up my final reserves of energy sprinting to stay
ahead of the pack and preserve some little honour. The formidable
steeple hurdle was coming up. I just didn‟t have enough spring in my legs
to clear it. Thwack! I hit my shin harder than ever against the metal bar. I
tumbled forward crumpled in pain clutching my leg, desperately trying to
hold back the tears. I knew that everyone was looking. I continued
haphazardly searching for my specs, the roars of laughter from the
balcony boomed in my ears. Just one kind hearted runner knelt down,
gave me my specs and helped me up. It was Martin. He ran ahead leaving
me behind, as I hobbled on to finish the race in crushing defeat.
As I stood there on the balcony, twenty years later, I could still hear the
mocking laughter of that merciless crowd.
„I hate this place. I shouldn‟t have come. Look I‟ll give you a call this
evening. Thanks for being a friend.‟ With that, I brushed past a confused
Martin and headed to the solitary flat in Kensington.
Later on that evening I was busy checking my emails. True to his word
Martin had sent me some quotes. The message was titled „Hope this
helps: there is no God, got it from Tony a few months back.‟ I printed
out Martin‟s note and slowly began to read it. It was a philosophical
essay, five sections to the email all neatly headed up. I found it heavy
going, re-read some of it several times:
“1. God is simply an invention of man to pin his sense of
duty/guilt
Immanuel Kant (1724-1804) an outstanding German philosopher who
in his masterful work „The Critique‟ written in the 1780s wrote:
‗In a word, he [mankind] needs a moral intelligence; because he exists for an end,
and this end demands a Being that has formed both him and the world with that
end in view. It is waste of labour to go burrowing behind these feelings for
motives;….. It is merely that the mind inclined to give expansion to its moral
19
 SECOND CHANCE

sentiment here voluntarily imagines an object that is not in the world, in order, if
possible, to prove its dutifulness in the eyes of such an object.‘
2. God and religion are simply a primitive biological and
sociological conditioned response, just like a dog‟s attitude
towards its owner
Charles Darwin (1809-1882), the great British natural scientist (I guess
there must have accidentally been one or two bright sparks who went
to Cambridge!) once and for all had shattered the fragile and puerile
stories of creation with his meticulous observations of life. In The
Descent of Man (1871) he wrote: ‗The feeling of religious devotion is a highly
complex one, consisting of love, complete submission to an exalted and mysterious
superior, a strong sense of dependence, fear, reverence, gratitude, hope for the future
and perhaps other elements. No being could experience so complex an emotion
until advanced in his intellectual and moral faculties to at least a moderately high
level. Nevertheless, we see some distant approach to this state of mind in the deep
love of a dog for his master, associated with complete submission, some fear and
perhaps other feelings… The same high mental faculties which first led man to
believe in unseen spiritual agencies, then in fetishism, polytheism, and ultimately in
monotheism, would lead him, as long as his reasoning powers remained poorly
developed, to various strange superstitions and customs.‘
3. God is Impotent and as good as Dead
Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900), the much celebrated 19th century
German philosopher and forerunner of the existential movement
wrote in „Beyond Good and Evil (1886)‟: ‗Why atheism today? ―The
father‖ in God is thoroughly refuted; likewise ―the judge,‖ ―the rewarder‖.
Likewise his ―free will‖: he does not hear – and if he heard he would still not
know how to help. The worst thing is: he seems incapable of making himself
understood: is he himself vague about what he means? These are what, in the
course of many conversations, asking and listening, I found to be the causes of the
decline of European theism; it seems to me that the religious instinct is indeed in
vigorous growth – but that it rejects the theistic answer with profound mistrust‘‘
Even if God did exist he clearly doesn‟t have either the power or the
inclination to do anything. Isn‟t all the suffering in the world and
confusion about whether or not there are gods sufficient proofs of the
non-existence of an omnipotent God? There‟s nothing up there that‟s
going to answer your prayers or guide you.
4. God is Simply a Psychological Projection of the ideal father
figure
Sigmund Freud (1856-1939), Austrian Neurologist and founder of
psychoanalysis would have told you that there are no gods. You are
simply projecting what you would have liked your own father to be
20
 DROWNING

ideally, an all loving and caring transcendent figure. Freud wrote in

„New Introductory Lectures on Psycho Analysis‟ (1933): ‗The rest of our
enquiry is made easy because this God-Creator is openly called Father. Psycho-
analysis concludes that he really is the father, clothed in the grandeur in which he
once appeared to the small child… He therefore looks back to the memory-image
of the overrated father of his childhood, exalts it into a deity and brings it into the
present and into reality. The emotional strength of this memory-image and the
lasting nature of his need for protection are the two supports of his belief in God.‘
5. Conclusion
Arjuna, you don‟t need God to win in this world. This is the
conclusion of the brightest minds, intellectual giants, that have ever
lived; Kant, Nietzsche, Darwin, Freud, Voltaire, Mills, Wittgenstein,
Marx and Bertrand Russell. Each and every one has reached the same
inevitable conclusion. Religion and god is an outdated concept. God is
just a figment of human imagination, a reason to have a strong sense
of duty, an ideal father figure that would always be there for you, a
primitive evolutionary puppy like emotion. Finally, you yourself said
that the world is full of evil and suffering which conclusively proves
that a loving omnipotent God cannot possibly exist.”
I found a marker pen and went through Martin‟s email and carefully
highlighted in luminous yellow Nietzsche‟s words: „Likewise his ―free will‖:
he does not hear – and if he heard he would still not know how to help.‘ ; and the
section on Freud : „He therefore looks back to the memory-image of the overrated
father of his childhood, exalts it into a deity and brings it into the present and into
reality.‘; and finally Darwin‟s observation: „The same high mental faculties which
first led man to believe in unseen spiritual agencies, then in fetishism, polytheism, and
ultimately in monotheism, would lead him, as long as his reasoning powers remained
poorly developed, to various strange superstitions and customs.‘
I picked up the phone and dialled Martin‟s number.
„Hi Martin. I got your email, thanks. It was a bit heavy going.‟
„Yes, sorry I knew it was a bit OTT when I sent it. I got it from Tony
only a couple of weeks ago. He thought that I might like it. I don‟t know
why he sent it to me. It was complete chance that I had it in my mailbox
– strange that you should be thinking about this kind of stuff. I thought
that it would help. Perhaps it didn‟t help.‟
„That‟s okay. I‟m glad that you sent it. I‟ve often had some of the same
kinds of thoughts as these guys. It‟s reassuring to know that some of the
greatest minds that have ever lived have also thought about this. I‟ve
wondered whether religion was just a total load of baloney.‟
„Well it is. I didn‟t send you another piece that I did on Karl Marx. He
said that “religion was the opiate of the masses‖.
„What does that mean exactly?‟

21
 SECOND CHANCE

„He meant to say that religion was something that was invented and
instituted by the bourgeoisie to keep the poor oppressed. The poor when
they go to church feel happier and relieved, they are then less likely to
complain, less likely to start a revolution and overthrow the ruling classes.
So religion is like some massive tranquiliser that sedates and subdues the
less intellectual masses.‟
„Do you really believe that religion is just some massive valium tablet?‟
„Yes I do, and the more I think about it, I find more and more
supporting evidence for that belief. Just think about it. People are more
religious where there is oppression, where there is less oppression there is
less religion. You know yourself how many religious people there are in
India which is so poor, whereas in the UK less than 5% of the people go
to church regularly on a Sunday. People are free and are not oppressed
that is why they do not need religion, whereas when you are poor and
desperate you need religion. Ergo religion is just an opiate designed to
relieve tension, a man made invention to keep things in check. The facts
speak for themselves.‟
„I hadn‟t thought of it like that. Thanks. I must get to sleep.‟
„You‟re welcome. Call me whenever.‟
I put down the phone and went to sleep.

22
 2 ANALYSIS

The phone rang at 1:30am. I got up, and walked to the living room and
picked up the phone.
„Hello this is Dr Gopal Krishna, calling from Toronto in Canada,‟ this
explained the rather anti-social timing of the phone call
„Sorry who did you say was calling, do you know how late it is?‟ I asked.
„Dr Gopal from Toronto, your Mother was very worried about you. She
asked me to do your horoscope and call you as soon as I had finished.
Didn‟t she tell you?‟
„Look I don‟t believe in that stuff anymore!‟
„Whether you believe in it or not my boy, it does not change the
outcome.‟
„It‟s late. Just tell me what you have to tell me.‟
„You are a very bright boy, are often misunderstood and have suffered a
lot in life.‟
„My Mum probably told you that.‟
„No she has not told me anything. It‟s all in your charts; including your
rudeness. The combination of Sunni, Guru and Budh is making you
behave like this. That is Saturn, Jupiter and Mercury. You cannot control
your emotions. You feel like crying all the time and just blow up. Is this
true?‟
I didn‟t reply.
„Hello, hello can you hear me? Is this true?‟
„Yes it‟s true. I‟m sorry for being rude, it‟s very late,‟ I was a little
surprised at my abruptness with Dr Gopal.
„You‟re a kshyatria. That is your dharma and duty in life.‟
„What‟s a kshyatria and dharma?‟
„You boys don‟t know anything. You have inherited all the knowledge
and wisdom in the world. You are lucky to be born a Hindu. The secrets
23
 SECOND CHANCE

to life are deep inside of you. A kshyatria is a warrior: a defender of the

faith, of the poor and needy. You cannot bear to see any injustice around
you. This and Mercury in the seventh house makes you very emotional
and prone to anger. There are three other casts Brahmins the Priests,
Vashyas the business people and Sudras the workers. There is a cosmic
order, everyone has his special place. Together we form the cosmic divine
godhead. The Brahmins are the head; the Kshyatrias are the arms, the
Vashyas the body and the Sudras the legs, together we manifest into the
cosmic body. Dharma is your God given purpose in life. It is the reason
why you have been born into this life. Your duty as a warrior is to protect
others and fight against injustice to protect the truth.‟
„Hello are you there?‟ asked Dr Gopal.
„Yes I‟m here. Go on, I‟m listening.‟
„This is important. The cause of your problems is to do with your past
life. You were drowned in your last life. You have unfinished business
that you need to resolve in this life, if you don‟t your suffering will only
continue.‟
„What suffering?‟, was all that I managed to say, after a brief silence, in
response to Dr Gopal‟s revelation that I had drowned in my past life.
„Ultimately you will gain happiness. This is a difficult time, you cannot
change that. But you can ease that suffering if you want to.‟
„How long will it last?‟
„That is up to you. A man that cannot swim who has fallen into a river
will thrash around and scream frantically trying to save himself but
ultimately he will drown. The same man, now dead will gently and calmly
rise to the top and float on the water. The more you thrash around the
more energy and pain you will experience. The wise man knows the
things the he cannot change and those that he can change.‟
„I don‟t understand what you are saying. What do I have to do?‟
„I shall send you a note which you have to read out aloud. There will be
a mantra in it which you should recite in the morning and in the evening
everyday for one week. Once you have read the note, you must burn it
and smear your body with its ashes. You must do this exactly as I am
telling you or it will not work. Do you want me to send this mantra? It
will take three days to prepare it. There are many incantations that I will
need to do to make it powerful enough to work.‟
„Send it. Do you have my address?‟
„No I do not have it. You can email me your address. The cost of this
mantra is $500 Canadian dollars. You can pay by MasterCard; just send
me your card number, name and expiry date.‟
I made a note of Dr Gopal‟s email and thanked him for his time,
booted up the computer and sent Dr Gopal the necessary details
straightaway. Dr Gopal told me that the letter with the instructions and
mantra would be with me within a fortnight.
24
 ANALYSIS

I got up and went into the kitchen, opened the fridge door and took out
a red apple and a knife from the kitchen drawer and returned to the living
room. I started to cut the apple. For the first time I noticed the way that I
was holding the knife, it was as if I had no thumb. To my surprise I could
control the knife just as well in this state, as when I held the knife
normally. I picked up a pen that was lying close by. I also held that as if I
had no thumb. I wondered whether there would be any difference in my
handwriting, holding the pen in this way; there was no difference in the
quality of my handwriting.
Monday morning. By the time I arrived at the office most of the
parking places were taken, leaving me to park in the overflow car park. I
had left the day free of meetings to write the report to the Board
recommending the acquisition of the Italian company. A day would
normally have been sufficient to get out the first draft and circulate it for
comments from Treasury, Legal, Regulations, Investment Appraisal and
PR. I rushed up to my office without giving my customary greetings and
smile to those that I met along the way, went into the office, with a
coffee, and shut the door behind me.
Several hours later, I was staring listlessly at the computer screen. I had
managed to write the heading for the Board paper and two introductory
paragraphs which I had copied from company annual reports. My hands
were resting on the keyboard. I glanced at my watch, 11:50. I put on my
jacket and told Penny, my secretary, that I was taking an early lunch and
would be back at 1.
Instead of going to the staff canteen I went to a nearby pub „The Red
Dragon‟. It was an old fashioned pub with a thatched roof next to the
river. A sign inside said that the building was a 17th century Coach House
where weary travellers could rest themselves and their horses, before the
final leg to London. It was always dark inside with low beamed ceilings.
Outside it was a bright sunny day, warm enough to sit outside, where six
wooden benches were arranged randomly on the grass bank leading down
to the tranquil water, a temporary home for a few quacking ducks
weaving in and out of the reeds.
I was on my own. I wasn‟t in the mood for conversation. I sat down,
intending to quickly eat my chicken and chips and get back to finishing
the Board paper. As I went to pick up my knife and fork, I was distracted
by a beautiful tanned brunette sitting at the table in front of me. She was
with her friends, laughing and having fun, wearing a dress that
accentuated her Lara Croft like body.
The thoughts of the previous night vanished. Now my mind was
overwhelmed with this beauty queen sitting in front of me. I was closely
observing the way her flowing brown hair brushed against her lightly
tanned cheeks, her large smiling brown eyes, and her long eyelashes, her
soft full-bodied lips, framing a perfect set of teeth. She was sitting at the
25
 SECOND CHANCE

edge of the table and occasionally the wind would brush aside her skirt
revealing exquisitely smooth perfectly formed tanned legs. My thoughts
started running away from me. I imagined being with her, just the two of
us, in a room somewhere. My thoughts were like a freight train running at
full speed, I couldn‟t control them, I couldn‟t stop them, a part of me
wanted to stop in disgust at what was about to happen, another part of
me wanted to go on, to enjoy the exhilaration of what was about to
happen. My imagination began to create the passion of the lift and
kitchen scene in Fatal Attraction combined with the erotic thrill of the
opening sequence of Basic Instinct.
I was holding her body close to mine, it was impossible to stop,
engulfed in the tsunami of my thoughts, her breasts pressed against my
chest. Now I was holding her face in my hands, my heart and her heart
were beating faster and faster. My lips lightly caressing her lips, I wanted
to stop this was not right, but I couldn‟t, then I moved my hands and
slipped of her dress, I wanted to switch off what was about to happen
another part wanted to continue. I could see, feel, and smell the fragrance
of her beautifully sculpted trembling body, now I was removing my
clothes, my hands caressing her full firm breasts, my lips gently suckling
her, stop, stop, but I couldn‟t, my breathing getting heavier and heavier,
her body and mine entwined, thrusting and plunging, my heart and her
heart beating together, the pressure building up inside of me, no, no,
wave upon wave of sheer ecstasy, pounding inside of me and inside her,
finally uncontrollable rapture as the waves of passion finally burst
through the dam.
The whole scene kept on playing in my mind. I couldn‟t stop it. I felt
sick inside. Why wasn‟t I in control of my thoughts, I could have looked
away, but I didn‟t. What kind of sick, sex obsessed, deranged pervert was
I turning into? Now it was too late. Every thought was now controlled by
the sordid imagined movie, swelling up into a volcanic frustration waiting
to erupt. I had to get to somewhere private to relieve the pressure, and I
knew that for a few seconds I would feel relief. I knew I would hate
myself for doing what I was about to do, that would last a lot longer than
a few seconds. I knew that this was the beginning. The cycle would start
again, each time it would take control of me, each time I looked at myself
in the bathroom mirror more disgusted at myself than the last. I wanted
all of this to stop, I was destroying myself. It was sick.
Just after lunch I bumped into Chris on his way back from the coffee
machine, he asked me how the paper was coming on. Chris stressed the
need to give the other departments, especially Legal, enough time to
scrutinise the paper, so that they didn‟t feel that they were being rushed
into making a decision. I replied in my customary „No problem, I‟ll get it
out by tonight.‟ By 6:00 most of the office was empty. By 10:14pm it was
just me and the security guard as I finished writing the final paragraph of
26
 ANALYSIS

the Executive Summary. I printed out the paper, to read what I had
written. As I read the paper, the furrows on my forehead started to
deepen, my teeth clenched tighter, this was a load of crap. It was too late
to rewrite it. I had promised Chris that I would send out the paper for
comments that day. I couldn‟t come in early next morning to re-write it,
as I was meeting with Rupert.
I sent out the paper, with strong caveats that it was a first draft and a
second version would be available for comment late on Tuesday. I
gambled that most of them reading the covering note would wait for the
second version, thus keeping my promise to Chris and not be in a
position of blame from the other departments for giving inadequate time
for comments.
I was scheduled to see Rupert at 8am. It was the earliest slot that Rupert
could give me. Rupert‟s consulting room was in Camden, making it an
awkward trek for me, as I had to traverse the city through dense traffic.
Rupert didn‟t have an office, he used a small room on the second floor of
an Edwardian three floor terraced house. I assumed that the house
belonged to Rupert. I parked in front of a house which had its windows
boarded up, and a broken sink lying in the front garden. I crossed the
road and noticed that there were other houses on the street that also had
their windows boarded. However, the house that I was standing in front
off had all its windows intact, the front door looked as if had been
recently painted with a deep black reflective gloss. I pressed the buzzer
below a white entry speaker.
„Hello, who is it?‟ crackled a voice through the speaker by the door
post.
„It‟s Arjuna. I have an appointment at 8‟, said I leaning into the speaker.
„Come up, second floor, second door on the left.‟
There was a buzzing sound, signalling me to push open the door. The
morning post and a copy of The Guardian and The Independent were
lying on the door mat. I picked up the post and put it to one side, and
noticed that the mail was addressed to a Sebastian, and a Richard, but not
Rupert. I was in a narrow hall way, with stairs to the left leading up to the
higher floors, the rest of the doors leading from the hallway were shut.
The stairs and hallway were covered with a patterned, but very faded
carpet. The stairs creaked as I slowly made my way up, in some places the
carpet had worn through to the edge of the steps.
At the top of the landing on the second floor, the first door was slightly
ajar. I pushed it back a little, revealing a standard white toilet with a
wooden seat and a spotless sink. The blue linoleum on the floor looked a
recent addition. I walked on and came to the second white door which
was shut. I knocked on the door.
„Come in, it‟s open‟, called a voice from behind the door. I opened the
door into a small bright yellow room flooded with golden sunlight
27
 SECOND CHANCE

coming from a large double sash window, practically the width of the
room. There was a leather chez-lounge underneath the window which
had a thin grey blanket placed over it lengthways. There were
bookshelves from the floor to the ceiling, either side of a disused
fireplace, full of books neatly arranged. A tall thin elderly gentleman was
seated on a high back winged red leather armchair situated in the corner
of the room facing the door and to the right of the fireplace, his thighs
precisely perpendicular to his perfectly straight back, holding a clipboard.
The blue roller neck jersey went well with his black corduroy trousers and
highly polished plain black leather shoes. His youthful bright blue eyes
looked a little out of place in his wrinkled blotchy pink face. His thinning
silver hair parted to one side was accurately combed. He held out his
hand, whilst still firmly seated and said:
„Good morning Arjuna, how are you this morning?‟
I shook Rupert‟s hand. Rupert motioned me, with the flick of his index
finger, to the chez lounge under the window.
„Do you want me to take of my shoes?‟
„Yes if you don‟t mind.‟
I slipped of my shoes, placed my jacket on a nearby chair and made
myself comfortable. The warm sunlight was streaming on to my face.
„Do you want me to pull the blind down?‟ asked Rupert.
„No its okay I like to feel the warmth of the sun, we so rarely get it.‟
„What would you like to talk about?‟
There was a long pause before I replied.
„I am having difficulty concentrating at work. I can‟t seem to focus.‟
„What do you mean by focus?‟
„I have other thoughts coming into my head which I just can‟t get rid
off‟
„What kind of thoughts?‟
There was another long pause. I shifted myself from side to side.
„Could you lower the blind, please?‟
Rupert got up and lowered the blind and sat back into his armchair.

„What kind of thoughts?‟ patiently asked Rupert in a soft considerate

tone.
There was another long pause.
„I keep on thinking about some things over and over again.‟
„What kind of things?‟
„Things about girls,‟ I turned my head towards Rupert to see his
reaction. Rupert remained unmoved.
„What kinds of things about girls?‟
I turned my head away from Rupert towards the wall.
„I was having lunch yesterday and there was this girl sitting in front of
me. I started to imagine being with her, I couldn‟t shake that thought
28
 ANALYSIS

away. I can‟t help…,‟ there was a long pause and then I resumed
speaking.
„I can‟t help thinking that I‟m some kind of sex mad pervert.‟
„It is perfectly normal and healthy for you to be attracted to girls. There
is nothing perverted about that.‟
„I imagine having sex with them.‟
„That‟s what most healthy males imagine, it‟s a normal biological
response.‟
„But I can‟t control the thoughts. They just keep on playing in my mind.
I just want to relieve myself.‟
„There is nothing wrong with masturbation. It is a normal and healthy
activity.‟
„There‟s nothing wrong?‟
„It‟s normal.‟
„I wasn‟t like that before.‟
„You were afraid of sex before, now you are less afraid. You are
growing up.‟
„Growing up?‟
„Yes. You may be physically grown up. But you also have to develop
and grow emotionally. If for some reason you are not emotionally
developed, and most are not, then you will have all kinds of problems
with relationships. Your sexual urges are normal. It‟s just that you do not
know how to manage them, that requires emotional maturity. This is all
perfectly normal.‟
„What level do you think I am emotionally?‟
„Probably between three and five. But we can accelerate the growing up
process.‟
„How long will it take for me to grow up?‟
„Anywhere from three to five years, maybe more.‟
„That long?‟
„Yes it could be longer. It all depends on what we find along the way.‟
„Isn‟t there anything that I could read to make this process faster?‟
„Not really but if you really want to read something, then some people
have found „A Road Less Travelled‟ and „Families and How to Survive
Them‟ useful.‟
„Let me write down the titles, who are they written by?‟
„M Scott Peck and the other book is written by Skynner and John
Cleese.‟
„John Cleese?‟
„Yes, John Cleese the actor. I‟m afraid that is the end of our session, I
will see you on Thursday. Goodbye.‟
„Is that it?‟ I asked, looking at my watch, I thought I had another five
minutes left.

29
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes. I shall see you on Thursday afternoon. Goodbye,‟ Rupert leaned

forward and opened the door.
„I am going to be Brazil on Thursday, is there any way that we can do it
over the phone? Preferably first thing in the morning, that will make it
just before breakfast in Brazil.‟
„Let me see, yes we can do it over the phone at 9am London time, but it
is always better for you to be here. Let me give you the phone number to
call.‟ Rupert wrote down the phone number and the book titles on a
piece of paper which he gave to me.

I took my time putting on my shoes, said goodbye to Rupert and

rapidly trotted down the stairs.
As soon as I got into the office I called around to get comments on the
paper that I‟d hurriedly sent out the night before. None of them had read
it. All of them were too busy and said that they‟d wait until I had finished
the next draft. The session with Rupert had helped. In the next three
hours there were no trips to the coffee machine just the continual tap tap
on the keyboard as I focussed my energy on the Board paper. As I read
through my finished work, I started to smile.
I reached Terminal 4 in good time to allow me to buy the two books
that Rupert had recommended. I planned to read them during the ten
hour over night flight to Rio. However, the comfortable, fully reclining
seat, the champagne, the meal and the stress of the last several days got
the better of me, I was soon fast asleep.
At Big Group headquarters everyone hoped that they‟d get transferred
to Rio. There was a car to pick me up from the airport, which took me to
Big Group‟s company apartment overlooking Ipanema beach. The drive
from the airport into town was breathtaking. The sun was shining and the
road was never far away from the ocean. I could see the famous large
statue of Jesus Christ with his outstretched arms on top of one of the
hills; he seemed to be watching over me as I headed along the 4km drive
along Copacabana Beach on the way to Ipanema. I looked at my watch as
we passed by, it was 8am on Wednesday I didn‟t think that it was a
holiday but there were loads of people already on the beach. Ipanema
beach was equally busy; at 3.2 km it was a little shorter than Copacabana
and not as broad. At the end of the beach was another large hill. I
imagined what a great view it would be from the top of the hill. As we
got closer it seemed as if the hill was breaking out into measles. These
measles turned out to be some of the hundreds of corrugated tin roof
shanties, a favela, precariously clinging onto the hill face.
We were soon at the apartment situated on the sixth floor of a purpose
built residential complex. The apartment was full of IKEA type furniture
giving it a light modern touch. The main feature was a balcony
overlooking the beach with a couple of cane armchairs and a telescope on
30
 ANALYSIS

a stand; someone‟s interested in astronomy, I thought. The driver said

that he would wait for me, to freshen up and then take me into the office,
the workshop wasn‟t meant to start until after lunch. I planned for the
first session to last three hours, a chance to agree objectives, a gentle
warm up for the next two days of full time sessions.
Big Group‟s office was located in the heart of Rio on the eighteenth
floor of the tallest office block. I went straight in to meet with Victor,
head of South American operations, who had wisely negotiated with
headquarters to locate the office in Rio rather than in built up Sao Paulo.
Victor had a large corner office with full glass walls which overlooked the
bay, the exclusive Yacht Club and a breath taking view of Sugar Loaf
mountain. I remembered seeing it in an old Roger Moore James Bond
film, Moonraker, it looked a lot better in real life than on film.
Victor stood up and walked around his desk with a big smile on his
face.
„Hello good morning,‟ said Victor exuberantly, „did you have a good
flight?‟
„Yes thank you Victor. Thanks for making me feel so welcome, the
driver was there on time, and the apartment is lovely.‟
„Rio is a wonderful place, I am sure you will enjoy it.‟
„Shall we go through the workshop agenda?‟
I took Victor through the format of the workshop. He had one or two
suggestions which I incorporated into the presentation.
„Is there anything else?‟ asked Victor with a beaming smile.
„No that‟s it.‟
„Great let me introduce to the rest of the team. I have a lunch
appointment but I will join you at 2pm in the Board room.‟
Victor quickly introduced me to the rest of the team, and then left for
his lunch date. I wanted to spend most of my time getting to know Paul,
the Business Development Manager. Paul was from somewhere in
America, I had asked a number of times and each time I got a different
answer, born in New York, school in Chicago, moved to Los Angeles,
married in Dallas, divorced in Tuscon. He told me that he had worked in
US Army Intelligence office as part of the Middle East surveillance team
before plunging into the corporate world, working his way around Latin
America before joining Big Group in Rio. He was five years older than
me, his gaunt features and tanned, slim, athletic build made him look a lot
younger, than the average, slightly tubby, flaccid Big Group Executive.
Paul turned out to be living in the apartment above the one that I was
staying in.
„Do you like it in Rio?‟ I asked.
„It‟s incredible,‟ replied Paul, „it‟s the capital of hedonism, the best city
I‟ve ever lived in. Sometimes it‟s a little difficult to get things done
quickly and I have to travel a lot. But all in all I‟m not complaining.‟
31
 SECOND CHANCE

„Who‟s keen on astronomy?‟

„Astronomy?‟
„Yes you know the telescope on the balcony.‟
„That‟s not for looking at the stars in the sky,‟ chuckled Paul, „it‟s for
looking at the stars on the beach!‟
I laughed along with him.
The workshop went according to plan. Victor had a friendly and
enthusiastic team working with him. He arranged for me and the team to
get to know each other better over dinner at Mario‟s in Copacabana. Paul
told me that Mario‟s was the best Churascaria, a traditional Brazilian
barbeque, in Rio. Excellent, I‟d have time for a quick run before dinner to
help get over the jet lag.
It was a wonderful setting for a run. There was a purpose built track
along the side of the beach for joggers, cyclists and roller bladders. I was
surprised to see so many people walking, jogging and cycling. The warm
evening with the cool breeze blowing from the sea was perfect for
running. I liked to concentrate on the day‟s events whilst running, it
helped me file away the incidents in my head, clearing it for the next day.
As I ran it seemed to me that the contestants for Miss World had decided
to run alongside me. Victor and Paul were right, Rio was a wonderful
place. I got back to the apartment and went straight to the balcony, to
look through the telescope and gaze at the few remaining bikini beauties,
basking on the sand soaking up the last rays of sunlight. This is what
heaven must be like.
I looked at my watch. I was due to meet Paul in forty minutes in the
lobby downstairs to go to Mario‟s. I walked back into the apartment to
the rear bedroom. The omnipresent statue of Jesus was still smiling at me
through the bedroom window. I was tired, fatigued by the overnight
flight and run, so I lay down on top of the bed, and crossed my arms on
top of my chest, just like Tutankhamen lying in his sarcophagus. The
adrenalin and pheromones surged through my body, raising my body
temperature, my whole body felt like it was glowing and radiating peace
and happiness. The evening clouds rolled in from the ocean huddling
against the Rio hills and I turned my head to see Jesus Christ lit by
floodlights. It looked as if he was floating on top of the clouds. I sank
further into the bed fully relaxed.
I got up just in time to make the call to Rupert. I was feeling more and
more confident, I was enjoying this. The workshop went well, Victor and
his team agreeing on which acquisitions they should focus their energies.
I found it easy to get to know Paul, chatting about our respective pasts, as
we travelled together on the way to and from the workshop. Paul had
married straight after leaving University. It hadn‟t worked out. They were
divorced after nine months. No regrets, he said, life was great as a single

32
 ANALYSIS

guy. Paul was a refreshing sympathetic ear as I spoke to him about my

problems with Rita.
„When are you going back?‟ asked Paul.
„Friday night,‟ I replied.
„Stay back an extra night and leave on Saturday, Bianca will get your
tickets changed. Take this opportunity to experience life. Everything, I
mean everything is on sale in Rio. I‟ve got something planned for Friday
which will blow you away.‟
„Let‟s hope that I can get the tickets changed.‟
Bianca, Paul‟s secretary, tried to change the booking but came back and
told me that the flight was full on Saturday and that I would be waitlisted.
I told her to go ahead with the booking; I‟d take my chances with the
airline.
On Friday evening on the way back to the apartment with Paul, I asked:
„So what‟s the plan for tonight?‟
„We‟ll meet up at 10 in the lobby, get a bite to eat and then we‟re going
to the Happy Club‟
„Happy Club?‟
„It‟s where people feel Happy,‟ replied Paul with a big grin on his face.
„10‟s a bit late to go out to eat.‟
„I‟ve got to get a few things for tonight. Just chill, we‟re going to have a
blast.‟
„Okay see you at 10 downstairs.‟
„Make sure you have cash with you. Lots of it.‟
We took a cab to the Happy Club located two blocks behind and three
blocks to the left of the exclusive Copacabana Palace. There were two
huge body guards, dressed in black, at the front door. One of them
scowled at me, and the other opened the door.
„It‟s a hundred bucks entry; it covers us for two drinks. Do you have the
cash with you?‟ shouted Paul over the loud heavy rock beat blasting away
inside the club.
I handed the hundred dollars over. Paul got the tickets and we went
into the main club area.
In the centre there was a raised square stage and on either side by the
walls there were semi-circular raised platforms with poles sticking out
from the centres. On the platform on the far side there was a young
blonde girl with blue eyes and a silky smooth tanned body dancing
topless around the pole. I stood there motionless gawking at this
beautifully formed girl. Paul was busy looking for a table near to the
square dance floor. As I stood there, wondering what to do, a tall equally
beautiful brunette walked close by me, and stroked my crotch with her
hand as she walked by, turning her head and smiling at me.
„Come over here,‟ shouted Paul, „and get these down you it will help
you relax.‟
33
 SECOND CHANCE

I went over to the table and sat down next to Paul.

„Here take this,‟ said Paul thrusting a small glass with what looked like
freshly squeezed lime juice. Paul took his glass and slugged it back in one
go. I did the same. I almost spat it straight out.
„What on earth was that?‟ I asked.
„It‟s a caipirinhia. It‟s stronger than vodka and made from sugar cane
with a bit of lemon juice and sugar. Two of these and it will get you into
the mood.‟
Another girl, equally sensual as the first one I had seen, came and
started dancing around the other pole. Then more girls came and started
dancing on the square stage.
„Isn‟t this great?‟ asked Paul.
„This is what life is all about,‟ I replied.
Time sped by, as more and more girls filled the club.
I saw same the girl, that I had seen when I entered the club, walking up
to our table. She was now wearing a short skirt and a tank top that was a
little too small. She bounced over and sat down.
„Hello!‟ she said.
„Hi!‟ I replied.
„Move over bozo,‟ shouted Paul, „and let her sit down.‟
I moved over and the girl sat down close next to me, crossed her legs so
that her right leg rested gently across my legs, and she put her arm around
me, tenderly resting her firm round breasts on my chest.
„I‟d like a drink, a vodka and orange‟
„Off course,‟ I replied. Paul ordered the drinks, a double vodka and
orange and some more caipirinhias.
Paul leaned over and told me:
„Whisper „Eo te amo‟ into her ear. It means I love you and it makes
them go crazy.‟
The girl whose name was Maria giggled and kissed me in response to
my synthetic sweet whisperings.
Maria sat with me, her hand gently rhythmically stroking up and down
the inside of my thigh. The turmoil was beginning to start in my head
again. What was I doing here? These girls didn‟t want to be here. They‟re
forced to sell themselves out of economic necessity, only pretending to
enjoy being touched by lecherous men. I wouldn‟t want my sisters to be
in a place like this. Yet another part of me was enjoying it, enjoying all of
it, enjoying every moment. I drank some more, to stop the voice inside
me that was ruining my enjoyment. I then remembered what Rupert had
told me, this was normal, I was a male, I had hormones, I was simply
responding to a biological process. No need to feel guilty. Any regret, or
feeling of guilt vanished, I felt glad that I was seeing Rupert. The analysis
was working.

34
 ANALYSIS

We talked a little, I didn‟t know any Portuguese, and her English was
rudimentary, but there wasn‟t much to talk about as we giggled and drank
a few more caipirinhias. Two or three girls had come and sat next to Paul
before he settled on one, who it appeared that Paul knew quite well. Paul
got up and whispered something into Maria‟s ear she nodded and smiled
at me. Maria and the other girl, who was sitting with Paul, walked up and
headed towards the back of the club.
„Where did they go?‟ I asked.
„They‟ll be back. Have you got another hundred bucks?‟
„Yes. Here it is. What‟s it for?‟
„It‟s for a night of fun. Come on we‟re going back to my place for a
party.‟
I was already quite tipsy, and didn‟t ask any more questions.
Maria and the other girl came back wearing jackets and their handbags.
„Come on,‟ said Paul, „we‟re off‟. He placed Maria and the other girl on
each of his arms and started walking towards the club exit. There were
plenty of taxis waiting outside, and soon I, Paul, Maria and Paul‟s girl
were on our way back to the apartment.
„You can use the spare room,‟ said Paul, „but first I want to give you a
little boost,‟ as the four of us entered the apartment. Paul showed Maria
the spare bedroom and showed his girl, to his bedroom.
„You come with me,‟ he said, pulling me by the arm into the kitchen.
He opened the top cabinet and took out a small unmarked bottle filled
with small white circular tablets. Paul was grinning like a complete
maniac.
„This is for you,‟ his grin broadened, „take it now here‟s a coke.‟ Paul
thrust a coke can into my hands.
It was all too fast for me and I was getting impatient with Paul. I
wanted to get back to Maria as soon as possible. I opened the can and
swallowed the tablet.
„And this one is for Maria,‟ Paul was now laughing uncontrollably.
„It‟s going to blow your brains!‟
I took the tablet and hurried back to Maria. She was undressed waiting
for me, lying flat on her back, her supple bronzed legs apart, wearing a
white g-string and stiletto heels. Her blue eyes looked at me teasingly, the
curls of her blonde hair resting on her succulent breasts, darkened nipples
erect. She smiled longingly at me, asking me to consume her ravishing
body. I was totally out of control.
„I have something for you,‟ I said, holding out the tablet and the can of
coke.
Maria looked at it and jumped off the bed and started to put her top
back on.
„What‟s wrong?‟
„I no take,‟ replied Maria.
35
 SECOND CHANCE

„Your friend how long?‟ asked Maria.

„This drugs make mad. You nice boy, must take out.‟
I just looked on at Maria, hurriedly getting dressed. I went back to the
kitchen, were I found the girl sitting on the counter top her legs wrapped
around Paul, her top was off and Paul was tenderly kissing her breasts.
„Heh Paul!‟
„Yes man, what is it?‟
„What were those tablets?‟
„That‟s XTC dude.‟
„Are you crazy?‟ I shouted, as I went back to bedroom. Paul didn‟t hear.
Maria was dressed and looking anxiously at me.
„Take out,‟ she said putting her finger in her mouth indicating that I
should vomit out the tablets.
I rushed into the bathroom and threw up all that I could.
I came out and looked at Maria. She looked into my eyes.
„How you feel? Your eyes big –look‟
I went into the bathroom and looked at my eyes in the mirror, they
were fully dilated. I felt that the room was growing bigger and bigger
around me.
„Come we go. You go home,‟ said Maria tugging me by the arm.
I left the apartment and went outside with Maria.
„You okay?‟ she asked
„Yes I‟m fine,‟ I replied.
„I go now,‟ said Maria as she flagged down a passing taxi, she kissed me
on the cheek, said „Ciao,ciao,‟ and stepped into the taxi.
I went back to the apartment, walking straight out onto the balcony,
and sat down on the cane chair still holding the can of coke. I looked at
the beach, at the waves lapping on the sea shore. I could see everything
so clearly as if I had 360 degree vision. I was staring straight ahead but I
could see the hill at the end of the beach to the far right as well. The stars
and the moon looked so close, close enough to touch. My heart rate
started to increase, beating faster, and faster. I was getting hotter, and
hotter. I took of my shirt. I could see my chest trembling, as my heart
rate seemed to spiral out of control. One minute, two minutes, three
minutes, it kept on going. The highly oxygenated blood surged into my
head making me feel euphoric. I looked at the beach and felt that I was as
tall as the eight floor apartment block. I could step out, float across to the
water, three hundred meters in front of me. Nothing was physically
impossible, I was indestructible!
I was part of all that I could see, the moon and the stars were outside
me and also a part of me. My body seemed to extend way into the
horizon encapsulating everything around me. I was at one with the
universe. Then my heart slowed down, my breathing became heavier and
more frequent. My body temperature rose, and all the pores in my skin
36
 ANALYSIS

oozed out my body fluids trying to cool me down. This cycle of rapid
heart beating, breathing and exuding sweat went on right through the
night until dawn. It was better than any physical workout that I had ever
experienced.
I had never felt so alive, so connected to my surroundings.
The sun was rising and I didn‟t feel the least bit tired. I was still sitting
on the balcony, surrounded by empty coke cans, looking at the early
morning joggers wondering what could have been, had Maria also taken
the XTC.

37
SECOND CHANCE

38
 3 THE CHOSEN ONE

My flight back to London wasn‟t until late evening. The booking was
confirmed, leaving me Saturday to enjoy the scenes and sounds of Rio. I
was still feeling unusually energetic. I decided to give Martin a call.
„Hello Martin, good morning, its Arjuna.‟
„What time is it?‟
„It‟s 7:30am‟
„What‟s wrong?‟
„Nothing, can you talk?‟
„Okay but make it quick I had a late night last night. I need my sleep.‟
„I‟m in Rio having a blast.‟
„You sound a lot more upbeat than when I last met you.‟
„Listen, have you come across that drug XTC?‟
„There was a guy in my department, our age, he took some and died.‟
I was no longer grinning. The stark reality of the danger that I had put
myself in was beginning to dawn on me.
„Hello, are you there?‟ asked Martin, thinking that the line may have
been disconnected.
„Yes I‟m here. How did he die?‟
„I don‟t know the details. He went to some Trance Techno party,
something like that. He took this stuff and had a massive heart attack. He
was dead by the time the paramedics got to him.‟
„How old was he? Did he have a heart condition or something?‟
„Not sure, I‟d seen him once or twice. He looked pretty fit to me. He
was in his late twenties, early thirties. Why this interest?‟
„Oh nothing,‟ I replied. Martin remained silent.
„Somebody was talking about it in the office over here,‟ I said breaking
the silence, „and I was just wondering whether you had come across it.‟

39
 SECOND CHANCE

„There is a lot of it around. You better stay away from it, it could kill
you. Is there anything else? I‟m really tired.‟
„Somebody recommended a couple of books to me. I just wondered
whether you‟ve come across them. The first one‟s „A Road Less
Travelled‟ and the other is „Families and How to Survive them.‟‟
„Is it by a guy called Scott?‟
„Yes the first one is by M Scott Peck‟
„I read it about a year ago. Depressing. You‟ll come to the conclusion
that the reason why you‟re unhappy is because everyone around you is
some kind of unbalanced psycho nut trying to make you go mad. It just
made me more paranoid. I found it unhelpful. The other one I don‟t
know about. Look I‟ve got to get some sleep.‟
„Okay thanks. I‟ll speak to you later. Bye.‟
I put the phone down and searched through my bags looking for „The
Road Less Travelled.‟ I took it to the balcony and started to read the
opening pages:
‗Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth
because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is
difficult- once we truly understand and accept it – then life is no longer difficult.
Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.‘
I found the opening paragraphs totally gripping, as if M Scott Peck had
written the book with me in mind. I spent the rest of the day indoors
totally absorbed by the book, by the time I got on the flight I had
finished reading it. I did the same with „Families and How to Survive
Them‟, devouring the entire book on Sunday.
Monday early morning, I knocked on Chris‟ door with a firm tap, tap.
„Come in,‟ called Chris, „how was Brazil?‟
„Highly productive. The session went well. Victor‟s got a good team.‟
„Drop me a one pager on the conclusions when you get a chance. I
went through the Italy Paper, it‟s in good shape. Make sure you get Legal
signed off on it.‟
„I‟ll do that. Anything else?‟
„Keep up the good work. By the way, how did it go last week with the
psychiatrist?‟
„I found it helpful. I‟m going to keep on seeing him.‟
„How long did he tell you that you‟ll need to see him?‟
I looked straight into Chris‟ eyes and remembered my earlier
conversation, with Rupert, about how long it would take.
„Well, it depends.‟
„I bet he told you 2 to 5 years?‟
„Something like that‟
„He probably agreed with everything you said and made you feel good.‟
„Well.‟
40
 THE CHOSEN ONE

„Next he‟ll probably suggest something for you to read that will make
you feel that the cause of your problems is everybody else; your wife and
your parents. Then he‟ll make you feel that you have serious problems
that may even require you to increase the number of sessions that you
have with him.‟
I stopped looking at Chris and started to look down at the floor. Chris
continued to lecture at me.
„Look I‟ve gone through this. This guy might be different from the one
that I saw. But all that my guy was interested in was making me
dependent on him; perhaps for the money, perhaps because he was
screwed up. I don‟t know, but it wasn‟t helpful. I just don‟t want you to
fall into the same trap. It takes time to realise what they are up to.‟
„Thanks for the advice. I think that Rupert is different. Look I‟ve got to
go.‟
„Don‟t forget to keep me in the loop on what‟s happening in Italy.‟
„Sure.‟
The rest of the day went well. My productivity was back to normal
levels. I met with Legal and got the sign off on the Italy paper, wrote the
one pager for Chris on Brazil and spoke to Victor over the phone to
agree next steps, specifically about who would be doing what in Brazil
and at headquarters in preparation for his investment strategy
presentation to the Board in three weeks time.
I got to Rupert‟s home early on Tuesday. I bounded up the steps and
told Rupert how much I had enjoyed my time in Rio. Over the next
couple of weeks Rupert increasingly encouraged me to explore my
feelings and re-iterated that I should not feel guilty about having any
sexual urges. This greatly alleviated the anxiety that I had been feeling
within me. It helped me deal with the troubled feelings that overwhelmed
me when I slipped into uncontrollable fantasies. I was beginning to look
forward to the sessions, the reassurance that I was on the right track. The
drowning nightmare no longer disturbed me. Dr Gopal‟s ranting
prophecy on my life no longer seemed to be relevant.
The months went by. I was sleeping better and working out regularly,
getting back into a routine at work and becoming more productive.
One day, I found myself turning off the A4 and heading towards where
I used to live. Soon I was standing outside my former home, a semi-
detached property in the suburbs of north London. Rita had immediately
fallen in love with it. There was a large garden for the future children to
play in and enough room on the side of the house to do a number of
extensions to accommodate a growing family. I had my own keys but
decided to ring the door bell instead. I hadn‟t seen Rita in months. It
might shock her if I just walked in. There was no answer. I rang the door
bell again and waited. Rita‟s car was parked outside. She must be in.
Perhaps she was in the garden. I walked to the side of the house and tried
41
 SECOND CHANCE

to look over the door leading to the garden, I couldn‟t see over it. I took
out my phone and started to dial Rita‟s number. Just then the door
opened.
Rita was dressed in a bright red long skirt and a matching red blouse
both had sewn in sequins and small mirrors with yellow and green thread
work. She was wearing a traditional outfit for garba, a form of dancing
popular in Gujarat, our ancestral home. She had lost weight and was
looking just as beautiful as she was when we were first married. Her hair
was gently flowing over her shoulders; her large brown eyes looked at me
and smiled.
„How are you doing?‟ she asked in her melodious sing song voice.
„You look well,‟ I was surprised at how happy she looked and was not
expecting such a welcome.
„I was just doing the divo,‟ replied Rita, „I heard the bell, but had to
finish of my prayers.‟
„That‟s fine, can I come in?‟
„It‟s your home, it always will be,‟ replied Rita as she opened the door
wide and let me into the living room.
„Are you going out somewhere?‟
„Bhavna is taking me to their navaratri.‟
„Bhavna?‟
„Our neighbour down the road, you know them number 42?‟
„Oh yes. Are they well?‟
„Yes they ask about you.‟
„Look you should go. I‟ll come back some other time.‟
„No you stay,‟ Rita headed for the phone and was soon talking to
Bhavna cancelling the programme. I did not try and stop her. Bhavna
asked Rita whether she was okay, Rita assured Bhavna that everything
was okay and then put the phone down.
Rita sat down on the sofa and motioned me to sit down next to her.
Rupert had warned me to stay away from Rita. He had told me that I was
not yet sufficiently mature to deal with Rita. I took Rupert‟s advice. I sat
down on the armchair at the other end of the room.
„Don‟t you like me?‟ asked Rita innocently, her voice beginning to
tremble.
„Look I better get going,‟ I replied. I was getting nervous. Rupert was
right, I wasn‟t ready for this.
Rita started looking down at the floor, she was sobbing just as she had
done at the Oberoi Hotel breakfast table. I got up and sat down next to
her, and tenderly tilted her head as I had done before, two tears, one for
each cheek trickled down her face.
„I will always love you,‟ I replied, my voice beginning to tremble as my
eyes filled with tears. I held her in my arms and we both started to cry.

42
 THE CHOSEN ONE

I held Rita‟s face in my hands and lovingly wiped away her tears, and
kissed her tenderly on her lips. The pent up passion that had been denied
to both of us burst out, neither of us could control ourselves, as over and
over again we consummated our lustful desires for one another, taking us
from room to room and finally upstairs to our bedroom.
Rita rested her head on my chest, both of us lying down exhausted.
„We can try again,‟ said Rita coquettishly as she twirled the hairs on my
chest with her finger.
„Try what?‟
„You know another round of fertility treatment, intra saitoe something.‟
I suddenly remembered Rupert‟s warning. I pushed Rita off my chest
and sat up in bed.
„You mean intra cytoplasmic sperm injection. ICSI. No,‟ I replied
angrily.
„We can have a family, be together,‟ Rita continued.
„We tried three times, the last time nothing happened. Each time it‟s
frying up your ovaries. It will kill you.‟
„I can take it.‟
„No‟
„Please we can be together.‟
„So that‟s what you were up to,‟ I shot out of bed. I needed to get out. I
hurriedly got dressed. Rupert was right, I was not ready. I had been
fooled.
„Where are you going?‟ asked Rita her voice quivering.
„I should never have come. I made a mistake.‟
„I love you,‟ burst out Rita, tears streaming down her cheeks.
„No you don‟t.‟
Rita lunged forward in a futile attempt trying to hold me back.
„Please,‟ she begged, „I love you.‟
Tears started to well in my eyes, triggered by the sorrow and pain that I
could see in Rita‟s face as it began to puff up from crying. I almost turned
back. But, then I remembered the advice from my guardian, Rupert, to
break free from Rita.
„I‟m sorry,‟ with that I rushed down the stairs and drove away as fast as
I could to refuge, back to the apartment in Kensington.
I ran up the four flights. There was an envelope waiting for me, which I
ignored, I went straight to the bedroom, flung myself on the bed and let
myself go, sobbing uncontrollably.
Tuesday morning. I was standing outside Rupert‟s home. I had rung the
entry buzzer and was waiting to be let in. The buzzer went off. I slowly
walked up the stairs, my head down, my hair dishevelled and my eyes a
little red from the night before. I entered into the consulting room and
went straight to the couch. It was gloomy outside and was starting to rain

43
 SECOND CHANCE

a little, Rupert got up and switched on the light to banish the gloom
inside the closet sized room.
„What would you like to talk about today?‟ asked Rupert.
I fidgeted on the couch trying to make myself comfortable.
„I went to see Rita last night.‟
I turned around to see Rupert‟s reaction, Rupert‟s eyebrows raised a
little and his head tilted back.
„What happened?‟
„Just to see her.‟
„And…‟
„She started to talk about having children and about going for another
round of ICSI.‟
„How did you feel?‟
„Closed in.‟
„Yes‟
„Boxed in.‟
„Yes‟
„I felt that I was being trapped by her.‟
„Go on.‟
„Just like it says in „Families and How to Survive Them‟. She just wants
kids to love and dote on. I‟ll be useless baggage then. Someone to pay the
bills, drive her and the kids around, someone to do odd jobs around the
house. She was never interested in me. She doesn‟t love me.‟
„She is trying to get pregnant,‟ reasoned Rupert reassuringly, „if she
becomes pregnant you will not be able to escape. It will be your death.
Yes, you must stay away,‟ the fingertips of his hands touched each other
forming a steeple with which he stroked his chin.
The debriefing went on, as I described my feelings and how I finally
escaped down the stairs. Rupert confirmed that I had done the right
thing. The session was soon over.
I spent the rest of the day listlessly staring at the computer screen. I was
quiet and passive in the couple of meetings that demanded my
attendance. I was wondering whether to just go home when I heard a
knock at the door.
„Come in,‟ I called out, swivelling my seat to see who it might be.
„Hello Krishna what are you doing here I thought you were in
Indonesia?‟ A tall thin dark man with a thin moustache entered the room.
He was smiling and his skin had a warm glow to it.
„I was here on a course,‟ replied Krishna, „I‟ll be going back in a few
days. Thought I‟d come and say hello.‟
„You‟re looking great. What kind of course?‟
„I‟m feeling great. It‟s because of the course. It‟s Vipassana.‟
„What‟s that?‟

44
 THE CHOSEN ONE

„It‟s a meditation technique that was used by Buddha to reach

enlightenment. It clears your mind, getting rid of all that rubbish that‟s
buried in there. It‟s a residential course, you get up at 5am, wash and then
go to class to meditate, there‟s no speaking and you don‟t eat much.‟
„How long did you do that for?‟
„Ten days but you can go for even longer.‟
„Ten days?‟
„It‟s worth it. I feel so much calmer in meetings and in my day to day
work. You should give it a go.‟
„You‟re looking great. Maybe I should give it a go.‟
„You should. How‟s life with you?‟
„Fine. Busy. Look can we catch up tomorrow or something I‟ve got a
lot to do.‟
„Sure. I‟m on extension 3452.‟ Krishna waved goodbye and left.
I switched off the computer, put on my jacket and waited for Krishna
to be sufficiently distant. I quietly slipped away and headed for
Kensington.
I noticed the envelope which had been sitting there for over 36 hours.
There were Canadian stamps on the envelope. It was from Dr Gopal. I
read out the note, memorised the mantra and then went to the kitchen,
took out a match and burnt the paper in a plate. As instructed, I took the
ashes on the plate into the bathroom, undressed, smeared my body with
the ashes whilst saying the incantation and then showered. I felt relaxed.
It was working, watched a bit of TV and went to bed.
I was soon sound asleep. A new picture was forming in my head. I saw
a man that looked like the one that was running, the one trying to escape
in my recurrent nightmare. The man looked Indian he had a well trimmed
moustache and a goatee. He was dressed in white, just as in the
nightmare. The man was concentrating on something. Then I saw what
he was working on, a statue. He was perspiring a lot. The picture went
hazy and the man reappeared standing in a large ornate room. It seemed
very old perhaps sometime in the last century. The man was bending
down in front of a throne, covered with pearls on which was seated a
rather plump man wearing a brightly coloured turban, a purple silk robe
with golden threads, a dagger with a jewel encrusted handle hung around
his cummerbund.
„Do you know why I have summoned you, Aman?‟ asked the gentlemen
seated on the throne.
„No, my Lord,‟ replied the man dressed in white.
„You are my finest sculptor. I want a piece that is like none other on
this earth. You will make it for me. I will reward you with ten lifetimes of
riches. In return you will give me your thumb as a mark that you will
never sculpt for anybody else.‟

45
 SECOND CHANCE

„Your wish is my command,‟ replied Aman, as he kept his head bowed

and walked backwards out of the throne room.
The picture went hazy again. I saw Aman sculpting a beautiful lady,
wearing a thin veil. The scene dissolved and I saw Aman lying on a couch
draped in yellow and red silks he was trying to hold a flask in his hand,
his thumb was missing. A lady came up to Aman, she looked familiar.
„Why do you do this to yourself my lord?‟ the lady asked in a sweet
melodious voice.
„Leave me alone Mumtaz. What else is there to live for I cannot sculpt
anymore.‟
„We have enough for our children, what more is there?‟ replied Mumtaz.
„Children,‟ Aman replied rather angrily, „that is all that you care and talk
about, leave me alone.‟
I was growing restless, moving my head from side to side, my eyes still
closed. I didn‟t want the dream to end, what was going to happen next?
Aman was looking happy, he was with another girl. She looked like just
like the sculpture, which Aman had tried to disguise with a veil. Mumtaz
walked in and screamed at the sight of the two of them in each other‟s
arms. Aman got up, Mumtaz started to run shrieking hysterically, as she
headed towards the stairs.
„Mumtaz!‟ shouted Aman.
Mumtaz turned around to look at Aman, a little too quickly, making her
lose balance, tipping her over the stairs. Her arms were flailing
desperately trying to hold onto the curved banister, down and round she
went, tumbling over and over. Thud, thud, thwack and silence. She
cracked her head on the marble floor below. A crimson liquid oozed out
from underneath where she had fallen. Aman ran down the stairs, bent
down and cradled Mumtaz‟ bloodied head in his arms. Mumtaz opened
her eyes, her large brown eyes staring at Aman.
„I love you,‟ said Mumtaz, as her heavy eyelids closed.
Aman started to cry uncontrollably.
„Forgive me,‟ he bawled at the lifeless face, „I love you.‟
Three men, disturbed by the sound, walked into the hall from adjoining
rooms. The girl, that Aman had been with, arrived at the top of the stairs
and screamed at the sight before her. The three men looked up at the girl,
and then at the lifeless body of their sister, then at Aman, rage swelling
up inside them. Aman got up quickly, taking them by surprise, pushed
them out of the way and ran out of the door into the courtyard.
The picture darkened again. Aman was running into the nearby fields,
then staggering down the embankment, wading into the water trying to
get away from Mumtaz‟ brothers. They were soon on top of him, holding
Aman‟s head down under the water. That‟s when I woke up, sweating
and wheezing.

46
 THE CHOSEN ONE

I got up early to get into my office. I needed to find the piece of paper
on which I had written Krishna‟s extension number. There it was, 3452. I
asked if Krishna could come up for a chat. Krishna was soon in my
office.
„What exactly do you do in Vipassana?‟ I asked.
„You meditate. You try and clear your mind. If a thought or picture
comes into your mind you try and not dwell on it, you become detached
until the thought simply dissolves away. You keep on practicing this until
you reach that point of stillness, when you get to that point of
nothingness you will feel a sense of complete bliss. It‟s an amazing
feeling.‟
„How long does it take to get to that point?‟
„It depends on you. The first time I went on a course, I just couldn‟t
clear my head even for a second. On the last day I managed for about ten
seconds, but it was enough to feel that sense of bliss. Now it takes me a
couple of days before I can experience that sense of nothingness, it
doesn‟t last long. But it is getting longer and longer.‟
„Can anyone go?‟
„Yes. The courses are held throughout the year, you just have to book
it.‟
„It‟s the technique that Buddha used, is that right?‟
„Yes with that he was able to go back and see all of his past lives up to
the time when he was a bullock pulling a cart with a weaker cow, he had
pity on that cow, that is what started his journey to ultimate realisation, to
reach Nirvana a place of complete bliss.‟
„Past lives. Do we all have them?‟
„It is a scientific fact. There have been many past life cases. A five year
old village boy in India claimed to be the re-incarnation of a recently
deceased head of a nearby Buddhist monastery. He kept on telling his
parents that he had to go home back to the monastery. They ignored him.
One day he ran away, his parents eventually found him at the monastery;
their son was talking to the monks, they were testing the boy to see
whether he really was their revered teacher. They had laid out a large
number of objects and the young boy was picking out the revered
teacher‟s personal belongings. The monks were stunned; the boy was a
100% accurate. The final proof was when the boy ran into the dead
monk‟s room, went straight to behind the bed and smashed into the wall
with his foot to reveal a hiding place of the old monk‟s most treasured
possessions.‟
„That‟s amazing. So why do they keep on coming back?‟
„It‟s to do with karma. Under the law of karma for every action there is
a reaction, you reap what you have sowed in your past lives. Your soul is
immortal it transmigrates from one body to another, where it ends up is
dependent on what you did. Your destiny is totally up to you. How else
47
 SECOND CHANCE

do you rationalise why a kind and loving God would simply allow so
many unfortunate children and even babies to die of starvation and
suffering? God would never allow that. It is all to do with karma. They
would have done something in their past lives which they needed to work
through. Once you have worked through all of your karma and wiped out
your debts you will achieve moksha and attain nirvana. That is what
Buddha did through meditation and that is what I am trying to do
through Vipassana.‟

„Nietzsche said that God was dead,‟ I butted in, remembering Martin‟s
note, „he was powerless to do anything that is why there is so much
suffering.‟
„If you do not believe in re-incarnation then that is the inevitable
conclusion. There has to be some kind of spirit out there. How else can
you explain the experiences that people have? Or explain all of the
miraculous powers that some rishis have in India? Nietzsche was wrong
there is some kind of spirit; his experience was limited to the unspiritual
west. So the solution is re-incarnation. It‟s totally logical. Karma theory
has the answers.‟
„Okay I can see what you are saying. But what is Dharma?‟
„Dharma is your purpose in life. You have a certain role to play in this
cosmic creation of which we are all part of.‟
„Does that change with successive re-incarnations?‟
„No it doesn‟t, but a great deal of mix ups can take place depending on
your last thoughts. For example, let‟s say you are a man and you are
madly in love with some woman, then your last thought will be of that
woman which you‟re madly in love with. The result is that you will come
back as a woman, although you have a male spirit, so although you are a
woman you will be attracted to other women and not to men because
your immutable spirit is male. This is the explanation for homosexuality.‟
„Amazing! It sounds so logical. How can you know what you were in
your past life?‟
„Through meditation and hypnotherapy.‟
„Can you also tell through dreams?‟
„Yes you can.‟
„This is going to sound crazy, but I‟ve been having these very weird
dreams.‟
„What kind of dreams?‟
I described my recurring nightmare and the dream I had seen the night
before.
„Sounds like it could be a past life experience that is trying to tell you
something,‟ said Krishna.
„That‟s exactly what Dr Gopal said to me.‟
„Dr Gopal?‟
48
 THE CHOSEN ONE

„He‟s an astrologer from Toronto, he told me that I had drowned in my

past life and that I had unresolved business.‟
„See Hindu astrology is an accurate science. It‟s not like the stuff you
read in the Sun or the Daily Mirror. There‟s this place in New Delhi,
Foresight, they can do a really detailed horoscope for you. It‟s in
Connaught Circle opposite the Regal Cinema. Let me write down the
address for you.‟ Krishna wrote down the address on a napkin and
handed it over to me.
„This Dr Gopal told me that I was Kshyatria.‟
„A Kshyatria, a warrior,‟ replied Krishna, „I‟m a Brahmin a teacher. I bet
you‟ve always seen yourself as some kind of crusader. I‟ve always seen
myself as an educator.‟
„A little bit,‟ I was astonished to hear Krishna talk like this.
„It sounds as if you were a Muslim in one of your previous lives. A lot
of the fine sculptures were done by Muslims. The guy on the throne was
probably a Nizam. Maybe it was in Hyderabad. It was a very rich Muslim
state and there is a big water tank there, perhaps that‟s where you were
drowned.‟
„It sounds too weird.‟
„This stuff is real, don‟t ignore it. Look I‟ve got to go and get some
work done. I‟m flying back to Indonesia but stay in touch through email.‟
„Thanks. I‟ll stay in touch.‟
We shook hands, and Krishna left. I pondered on what Krishna had
said. I went onto the internet and found out what I could about
Hyderabad. There was a large water tank in Hyderabad, and a very rich
Nizam of Hyderabad who loved fine art and sculptures that lived in the
late 1800s. But I couldn‟t find any mention of a fabulous veiled statue.
Thursday afternoon. I was back on Rupert‟s couch recounting my
dreams of being drowned, and the conversation that I had with Dr Gopal
about being a warrior.
„Dreams are symbolic,‟ expounded Rupert in measured tones, „I can‟t
tell you whether it is a past life. When did you first have the drowning
dream?
„I don‟t know, but perhaps it was on my wedding night.‟
„Being drowned is symbolic of being suffocated by Rita, of being
castrated by her and not having any power. That is why your sperm are
lifeless not allowing you to have any children.‟
This was the first time that Rupert was being so direct. Rupert‟s
ordinarily dulcet tones were being replaced with a sterner matter of fact
demeanour.
„Okay maybe. But what about being a Kshyatria a warrior?‟
„Have you ever felt like that before? Like a warrior?‟
„Yes I have.‟

49
 SECOND CHANCE

„What do you feel like?‟ asked Rupert, he was steepling his fingers and
stroking his chin, this habit was beginning to annoy me.
„I sometimes feel like that there is a force out there and that if you
concentrate hard enough you can tap into that power.‟
„Like a Jedi knight?‟
„Well not exactly, but I do feel that I have something very important to
contribute to the world. I cannot stand it when I see injustice; when
children are being abused, and women are mistreated.‟
„Do you feel that you are the loner that can‟t find love; who is the only
one who can save the world and has to do it on his own?‟ posed Rupert.
„Yes I do feel like that.‟
„Like a modern day Batman. Like Neo, the computer nerd in the Matrix
who is really the chosen one?‟
„Sort of,‟ I remembered how much I liked to watch those dark Batman
cartoons, how my spine tingled in the closing scenes of the Matrix when
Keanu Reaves, playing Neo, realises that he is the chosen one.
„There are many people that feel that way. You are not the chosen one,
but you feel that there is something different about you. It‟s in your mind.
If you go onto the internet you will find many who are like you, search
under Hypo-manic. If there are others who think like you then there
cannot be so many chosen ones can there?‟ Rupert concluded
rhetorically.
I didn‟t reply, thinking about what Rupert had said.
„What did you like most about the Jedi?‟ asked Rupert.
„Being strong,‟ I said, „standing up to Darth Vader and rescuing Princess
Leia.‟
„Who do you think that Darth Vader and Princess Leia are in your life?‟
quizzed Rupert. „I guess you are going to tell me that Darth Vader is my
father-in-law and other authority figures and that Princess Leia is Rita,
who I am trying to rescue!‟ I was getting really annoyed.
„I am not telling you anything. You said it, not me,‟ it seemed that
Rupert had a triumphant tone in his voice as he rebutted my acclamation.
There was no point in arguing with Rupert. I tried to make myself
comfortable on his tiny couch, which was becoming more and more
uncomfortable.
„Time is up!‟ said Rupert abruptly, „I‟ll see you next Tuesday at 8am,
good bye.‟ A polite thanks and I was released, down the stairs and
through the front door.
That night I searched on the internet, typed in hypo-manic on the
Google web site. There were lots of references. One particular site had
stories of people who were diagnosed as hypo-manics. I spent the next
couple of hours reading through the testimonials. What tough and
difficult lives they had; a lot more pain and suffering than I had
experienced. It seemed that Rupert was right, there were many people out
50
 THE CHOSEN ONE

there that felt special, gifted, they did not go so far to say that they were
the chosen ones. Many of them had dropped out of school and had not
succeeded materially in life, citing the cause of their failure to their unique
qualities making it difficult for them to fit in.
In an effort to go to sleep, I turned on the TV, looking for the most
boring documentary that I could find, that would anaesthetise me to
sleep. It was a documentary on the media and they were interviewing
David Putnam, director of Chariots of Fire and Local Hero, who was
saying:
‗Far more than any other influence, more than school, more than even in home; my
attitudes, my dreams, my preconceptions of life had been irreversibly shaped more
than five and a half thousand miles away in a place called Hollywood. I labour
over all this to explain exactly where my passion for cinema stems from. Exactly
why it so hurts me that the movies so frequently sell themselves short unable or
unwilling to step up to the creative and the ethical standards that the audience is
entitled to expect from them.
The medium is too powerful and too important an influence on the way that we live
and the way that we see ourselves to be left solely to the tyranny of the box office, or
reduced to the sum of the lowest common denominator of public taste . This public
taste or appetite conditioned by a diet capable only of producing emotional and
mental malnutrition. Movies are powerful, good or bad they tinker
around inside your brain. They steal up on you in the darkness of the
cinema to form or confirm social attitudes. They can help to create a healthy,
informed, concerned and inquisitive society; or in the alternative a negative,
apathetic, ignorant society one merely a short step away from nihilism and despair.
In short cinema is propaganda benign or malign, social or antisocial, the factual
nature of its responsibility cannot be avoided. To an almost alarming degree our
political and emotional responses rest for their health, in the quality and integrity of
the present and future generation of film and television creators.‘
I intended for the television to send me to sleep, instead David
Putnam‟s words „Movies are powerful, good or bad they tinker
around inside your brain.‘ kept echoing in my head. The documentary
then moved back to the 1800s in Russia with what the journalist
described as a prophetic quotation from Fyodor Dostoyevsky who had
written:
‗First art would imitate life; then life would imitate art; and finally life would draw
the very reason for its existence from the arts.‘
The programme finished, I looked at my watch, 1:30am. I picked up the
phone and dialled Martin‟s number in New York.
„Hi Martin. Arjuna here.‟
„This is a better time to call. What‟s up?‟
„I think I‟m going mad.‟
51
 SECOND CHANCE

„Did you go and see your shrink today?‟

„Yes. Why do you ask?‟
„That‟s why you feel you‟re going mad. He‟s making you feel that way. I
told you that would happen.‟
„He said I was a hypo-manic.‟
„A what?‟
„A hypo-manic: people who think that they are special. They think that
they are the chosen one. Like Neo on the matrix. I went on the website
there are lots of them.‟
„What did it say on the website?‟ asked Martin.
„Most of them wrote of how relieved they were to be diagnosed as
hypo-manic, or hyper-manic or some other psychological technical term.
They were so grateful that there was a condition that described how they
felt. It was a big relief to them to know that it was just their mind playing
tricks with them.‟
„So what do you think, are you a hypo-manic?‟
„I think that I‟m special and different. You‟re special and different, don‟t
you feel that?‟
„Yes I do. You going to Cambridge and me going to Oxford, each of us
excelling in everything that we do, in and out of work, I think qualifies us
to believe that we are special. There is objective evidence to conclude that
is the case.‟
„That‟s exactly what I thought. I couldn‟t help thinking that this hypo-
manic thing is just some psycho mumbo-jumbo condition that people can
write doctoral theses on and conduct seminars and the like, saying that it
is all in people‟s minds. What if this is not the case, what if they really are
special and the cause of their stress has been to try and fit in with others
rather than be glad in their uniqueness and accept their differences? What
if this is the case with most people, every one trying to fit into an
accepted normative behaviour as conditioned by the soap operas, talk
shows and fashion magazines? Perhaps the cause of all the stress is the
disconnect between what they are really like, and what they feel they
ought to be. That‟s what I think.‟
„I think that you‟re right Arjuna. I don‟t trust these psychiatrists. They
have their theories and they are trying to tell you what is real and what is
not real. Most of them are so screwed up themselves that they‟re not
listening to what you are saying, but are wrapped up in their own
psychoses.‟
„But I don‟t know whether Batman, Star Wars, The Matrix and
Spiderman are simply reflecting the feelings that I already had. Or am I
falling into the trap that Dostoyevsky said people would fall into?‟
„What trap was that?‟ asked Martin.
„That people would imitate the arts and find the very meaning for their
existence in the arts. Am I trying to imitate Batman? Or even worse am I
52
 THE CHOSEN ONE

trying to draw meaning of life from a film like The Matrix? I wonder
sometimes whether our „waking‟ life is some massive illusion generated
by some supercomputer up there, and that these dreams of drowning that
I keep on having are the true reality that is trying to get in touch with me.‟
„I‟m worried about you,‟ said Martin. I did not respond to Martin‟s
concern.
„I suggest that you stop seeing that shrink. He‟ll make you go mad. You
should get this book by a guy called Masson „Against Therapy‟ it‟s worth
the read. Try and get some sleep. It must be late there.‟
„Thanks for listening. I should go to sleep. Goodnight.‟ With that, I put
the receiver down, went onto Amazon and searched for the book that
Martin had suggested. I found the book and noticed that those that had
ordered „Against Therapy‟ had also ordered „On Becoming a Person‟ by
Carl Rogers. I ordered both of them, warmed up a glass of milk in the
microwave and went to bed.

53
SECOND CHANCE

54
 4 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

Back at my desk staring at all my emails, I picked up the phone and

dialled, and got through to an answering machine.
„Hello Rupert, this is Arjuna. Look things are getting very hectic here at
work so I can only make it to our Tuesday sessions. I want to cancel our
Thursday time slots for the time being. Call me on 0774 778 2145 if there
is a problem. Thanks bye.‟
I put down the receiver and leaned back. That was a relief; it wasn‟t that
difficult to cancel Rupert. Back to email.
A few days later I received the parcel from Amazon, „Against Therapy‟
by Masson and „On Becoming a Person‟ by Carl Rogers. Within a couple
of days I had devoured both the books. I waited until it was 2am, to call
Martin.
„Hi Martin, how are you?‟
„Fine, how are you keeping?‟
„How come you know so much about this therapy stuff?‟
„I went through it a while back. I was in a bit of a mess and went into
therapy.‟
„I didn‟t know.‟
„It‟s not something that you tell others about. Why did you call?‟
„I got that book that you suggested and I also got another one by Carl
Rogers.‟
„Carl is supposed to be the father of modern day psychotherapy. So
what did you conclude?‟
„I read „On Becoming a Person‟ first. It explained how therapy can be a
caring approach; trying to help people come to terms with their emotions.
If all therapists practiced in the way that Carl described, then
psychotherapy could certainly help.‟
„That‟s true I agree with that. Psychotherapy can help.‟
55
 SECOND CHANCE

„But the other book scared the hell out of me: „Against Therapy‟ by
Jeffrey Masson. I couldn‟t believe all the examples he gave of how the
therapist manipulated and exploited his patients. How the
patient/therapist relationship is open to abuse on the part of the
therapist. Masson‟s conclusion that it would be impossible for
psychotherapy to ever really work because of the subjective biases and
neuroses of the therapist is a scary one. I can see how it might be true.‟
„That‟s the point. A therapist can easily manipulate you. You don‟t
know anything about the therapist. You don‟t know whether he is normal
or a total whacko. If therapy really worked then there should be fewer
nutcases out there. But the fact is that the number of nut cases and the
number of people in therapy is increasing, which means that it is not
working. When something works the number of cases declines. For
example, the vaccine against small pox has practically eradicated small
pox from this planet. If anything the whole psychotherapy business has
been booming and is growing at a significant rate.‟
„I don‟t know the facts. But it does seem that what you are saying could
be true. So if that is the case then are you trying to tell me that Masson
was right and that psychotherapy is dangerous and that you could end up
being worse off.‟
„Exactly! Most therapists are not like Carl Rogers, most are like the total
nutters described by Masson in his book. I‟m concerned that the guy that
you are seeing might be a nutter.‟
„Well so far Rupert seems to be more like a Carl type then a Masson
type. But you‟re right, if Rupert is not like Carl, then I could be in big
trouble.‟
„Bingo. Just watch out.‟
„Thanks.‟
A few months went by. I continued to see Rupert on a weekly basis and
stayed away from Rita. Things were getting busy at work, travel to
Singapore, Rio, Cairo, Milan and Delhi kept my mind occupied. The
disturbing dreams ceased, I was getting a lot more rest.
I was back on Rupert‟s couch, my eyes shut tight, shaking my head
from side to side. The sunlight was streaming through the window.
„I want you to relax,‟ said Rupert, „I want you tell me what you see and
feel.‟
„I am somewhere warm and dark,‟ I replied, „I feel safe.‟
There was a long silence. I was feeling very uncomfortable.
„Go on‟, urged Rupert.
„I feel lost, I feel unwanted. I can see myself as a baby. I am lying on my
own in the middle of a large bed. I am crying and crying. I am alone. I
want to be loved. Someone comes and sees me and then walks away.
There is nobody coming to love me. I am alone. I am crying all alone. I
stop crying, no one is ever going to come.‟ My voice was trembling, tears
56
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

rolling down my cheeks. I was turned on my side facing the window, my

legs tucked up, my back bent away from Rupert. My knees were touching
my chest.
„This is your earliest memory‟, explained Rupert, „you were in your
Mummy‟s womb feeling safe. Then you were a baby feeling lost.‟
I didn‟t respond. I lay still. Subconsciously, I had assumed the foetal
position. Fresh tears continued to stream down my face.
„That is the end of today‟s session. I will see you next Tuesday. Good
bye,‟ Rupert clinically concluded.
I sat up on the couch, removed a handkerchief and wiped the tears
away.
„How can I possibly remember when I was in the womb? Surely this is
just my imagination?‟ I asked Rupert.
„We remember everything. It is all stored in our subconscious mind.
Over the last months we have been peeling back the layers of experiences
to go back to your first moments. The root of your problems started
when you were in the womb. Once you understand those roots then you
can make a fresh start. This is the beginning. We will have plenty of time
to explore this.‟
„Okay,‟ I replied, as I walked out of the room and headed down the
stairs.
I rushed home, and phoned Martin, recounting what had just happened
with Rupert. I told him about this incredible experience. How could I
have remembered what happened in the womb? Why would my mother
not want me? Why would I be left crying on the bed? It didn‟t make
sense. Martin couldn‟t give me an answer. Instead, he suggested that I
speak to my parents. As I talked to Martin, tears started to well in my
eyes, the same emotions that I had felt whilst on Rupert‟s couch, were
building up inside. I finished the call and crashed out on the bed. I
crawled up into the same position that I had been in earlier. It was so
comforting. I couldn‟t hold myself back, and started to cry. As I cried, I
held my body tightly in my arms, trying to comfort myself, gently
rocking myself to sleep.
The next day after work I drove to the suburbs into a quiet road, with
large detached houses. I parked the car a little away from a mock Tudor
style house, with neatly pruned rose bushes, being winter the bushes were
barren. The car was pointing in the direction of the house. The lights
were on and the occasional shadowy silhouettes indicated that the house
was occupied. I took out a clove cigarette, made in Indonesia, a habit
picked up from Paul from my Brazil trip. I nervously tapped the end of
the cigarette on the dashboard. Lit it up, put it in my mouth, took a deep
puff, rolled down the window and blew out the smoke into the cool crisp
still night air. The first cigarette was soon gone. I needed another, all the
time looking intently at the house. I rummaged for a third cigarette, the
57
 SECOND CHANCE

pack was over. I rolled up the window and drove back to the flat. I
repeated the same ritual the next two nights.
On the fourth day, I went past my usual parking spot and pulled directly
into the paved driveway of the mock Tudor house. The lights were on,
the occupants were definitely in. I slowly opened the car door, got out,
and hesitantly rang the door bell.
A tall lady with greying hair dressed in a green sari opened the door. A
big smile burst open on her wrinkled face. She held out her arms to give a
warm loving embrace.
„I want to talk‟, I said abruptly, „and know some things.‟
„Aren‟t you going to let me hug you?‟ softly replied my Mum.
I walked past Mum and into the living room, where Dad was sitting
watching the news on TV. Dad smiled, switched off the TV and got up
to greet me. Dad was tall; the vigour of his youth had faded, all that was
left of his once thick raven black hair were a few grey tufts huddled
together above his ears making a last stand against the inevitable aging
process. He was wearing a red cardigan, dark trousers and a pair of
comfortable slippers.
„Hello Arjuna,‟ called out Dad.
„I want to talk.‟
The three of us sat down.
„Are you hungry?‟ asked Mum, „do you want anything to drink?‟
„I don‟t want anything. I just want to talk. I have some questions to ask.‟
Mum and Dad sat up at the edge of the sofa complying with my
request.
„Did anything strange happen when you were pregnant with me?‟ I
asked.
Mum looked at Dad, and sat back on the sofa. She was silent. She
looked as if she was thinking what to say. I sat perched right at the edge
of the sofa, looking intently at Mum.
„Did something unusual happen?‟ I asked again.
Mum looked at Dad again, still wondering what to say. Eventually she
broke her silence.
„Well only one thing. In the seventh month of pregnancy I had to be
rushed into the hospital because I had an appendicitis which needed to be
removed.‟
„And then what happened?‟
„I was very young and was afraid of what might happen to you. The
anaesthetic from the operation caused a reaction and my jaw was locked
into an ugly shape. I was sure that something had also happened to you
and that you were going to be born deformed.‟
„Why would you think that?‟ I asked.
„When I was 16 at school, a lot of babies were being deformed. They
showed us pictures of these babies they were thalo something babies.‟
58
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

„They were thalidomide babies,‟ Dad interjected trying to help Mum

out.
„Yes thalidomide babies. But at that time they did not know that it was
because of this medicine that mothers were taking. Nobody knew why
the babies were being born that way, some with no arms, some with no
legs. I was terrified to have a baby like that. I was frightened of your
grandfather and grandmother that they would blame me for producing a
deformed baby. They would reject you and me.‟
„Didn‟t you say anything to Dad?‟
„No I could not I was afraid of him. I did not want to have a deformed
baby. I really thought that you would turn out to be like one of those
babies. I did not want that.‟
„Then what happened?‟
„Well you were born and you seemed to be normal. I was so relieved.
For a couple of days I was hesitant not sure whether it was true. I was
hesitant to pick you up, you looked so fragile. I didn‟t want to hurt you.
But after a while I realised that there was nothing wrong with you. I was
so happy.‟
I looked at Dad. It was clear from Dad‟s features that he was hearing
this for the first time. He was unaware of the dark thoughts that had been
going through his young terrified wife‟s mind. I knew then, what it was
that I had felt on Rupert‟s couch a few days earlier. Mum did not want
me. She had been afraid of producing a deformed baby, of being rejected
together with her baby, thrown out of the house where she felt that
nothing short of perfection would be tolerated by her mother and father-
in-law.
I couldn‟t face Mum and Dad. I stared blankly at the carpet, head
bowed down.
„Why did you want to know all this?‟ asked Dad.
„Oh nothing.‟
„Can I make something for you to eat dikra?‟ Mum tenderly asked.
„No. I have to go,‟ with that I got up and left a bewildered Mum and
Dad.
That evening I just sat on the couch back in Kensington. As I sat there,
a feeling of sadness started to swell up inside of me. Before long I was
crying uncontrollably. I was on the floor rolling from side to side. My
arms tightly wrapped around my body, trying to hug myself, bawling my
eyes out. I couldn‟t control myself. I woke up the next morning on the
floor, crouched in the same foetal position. I looked at my watch it was
11:30, luckily it was Saturday. I didn‟t have to go to work. I got dressed
and walked down to the local video shop and hired a few videos,
comedies to cheer me up. I spent the day watching „The Blues Brothers‟,
„Shrek‟ and reading Alex and Dilbert cartoons.

59
 SECOND CHANCE

By the early evening my body was beginning to shake, my eyes

streaming with tears. The videos and cartoons were not working. I got
into the BMW and drove as fast as I could to my former home. Rita‟s car
was parked in the driveway and lights were on. I knocked on the door.
She opened the door. Her lips were pursed tight, she scowled at me.
„What do you want from me?‟ she asked angrily.
„Nothing,‟ I brushed past her and collapsed on the sofa.
Rita noticed my dishevelled state and asked what was wrong. I
explained what had happened with Rupert and the conversation with
Mum and Dad. Before I could finish I was crying again. I was on the
floor again howling out, „Help me. Help me.‟
Rita bent down and tried to pick me up and get me on to the sofa. I was
too heavy for her. She looked at me with pity. She had never seen me in
this state.
„What do you want me to do?‟ she asked.
I was crying uncontrollably.
„Call Rupert‟, I bawled out.
„I don‟t have his number.‟
„My wallet,‟ I cried out.
Rita crouched down and searched my pockets, made more difficult with
my continual rocking from side to side. Eventually she found my wallet.
She opened it and found her picture inside. It was one that I had taken
on our honeymoon. She was smiling at me. My wailing broke her chain of
thoughts. She continued looking, eventually finding Rupert‟s card.
„I found his card.‟
„Call,‟ was all that I managed to say,
Rita dialled Rupert‟s number. She got the answering machine.
„Hello this is Rita, Arjuna‟s wife. Arjuna‟s not well he needs to see you.
Please call back on 020 866 9344.‟
„No. Must see. Take me,‟ I spluttered in the midst of my sobbing. I put
my arms underneath my body and raised myself up, collapsing into Rita‟s
arms. She nearly toppled over. The two of us struggled out of the house
and somehow she managed to put me into the front seat, and strapped
me in with the seat belt. The seat belt helped restrain me. I had calmed
down a bit, I was gently sobbing. An hour later, Rita reached Rupert‟s
home. I had stopped crying by then. She helped me to the front door.
„I can manage from here. Wait in the car,‟ I said as I pressed the entry
bell, „I‟ll be back soon. Thanks.‟
„Who is it?‟ it was Rupert‟s voice.
„It‟s Arjuna. I need to see you urgently I am in a desperate mess. You
must see me.‟
„Come back on Tuesday.‟
„I must see you,‟ my voice was breaking down and I was starting to cry
standing at the door step.
60
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

„Wait. I‟ll come down for you.‟

Rupert opened the door. I steadied myself, trying to stop from falling
onto Rupert. Rupert grabbed hold of my arm and led me slowly up the
stairs into his counselling room. I fell onto the couch, my feet dangling
on the side.
„What appears to be the matter?‟ asked Rupert.
„I have been a complete mess since we met the last time. I went and
spoke to my Mum and Dad.‟
„What happened?‟ enquired Rupert.
I recounted the conversation and all that had happened that night in the
apartment and then on that day at Rita‟s place.
„How do I stop this happening?‟ I pleaded.
„Well it will take some time,‟ replied Rupert hesitantly, „there is a lot of
emotion pent up there that you need to release.‟
„What do you mean some time,‟ I angrily interrupted, „how long
exactly?‟
„It could take two years maybe longer.‟
„Two years! What are you talking about? I can‟t stay like this for two
years! You got me into this mess. You better sort me out and do it quick!‟
Rupert hesitated again, and said „It cannot be done quickly.‟
„You are absolutely useless‟, I shot back, „there‟s no point in talking to
you.‟ I summoned up my remaining energy and slowly removed myself
from the couch and out of the room. I grabbed hold of the banister and
descended the stairs one step at a time. Rupert stood at the head of the
stairs watching me painstakingly make the journey out of the house. I
gave my last look at Rupert; his lifeless, cardboard like, silhouette
continued to watch me, his former patient escaping from the couch that
had one time been so comforting.
I got into the car.
„Take me to my flat. I need to be alone.‟
Rita did exactly as she was told. She remained silent during the journey.
We were soon at the flat.
„Will you be okay?‟ she asked.
„Yes. Thanks for taking me. I‟ll call you if I get into trouble. I‟m okay
now.‟
It took me over a quarter of an hour to climb up the four flights of
stairs to the apartment. I opened the door and went straight to bed,
where I lay crumpled, in complete exhaustion. I put my arms on my chest
and lay there, just as I had lain in the room in Rio several months earlier.
I started to feel relaxed. The heat from my arms soothed my tired chest. I
wondered what to do next, the tears were building up again, waves of
sadness swelling up. With my eyes closed I started to say out loud: „I am
calm, I am loved and I am happy.‟ I don‟t know what prompted me to
say these words, but I kept on repeating them over and over again. The
61
 SECOND CHANCE

waves of sadness began to dissipate, the crying stopped. I continued

repeating the words. Slowly I was managing to seal shut my own
Pandora‟s Box of pain.
I spent most of Sunday in the same position softly repeating „I am calm,
I am loved and I am happy.‟ It was working. The desire and urge to cry
uncontrollably was gone. I called Rita and thanked her for taking him to
see Rupert. Next I called Chris on his mobile number; the call got
diverted to his voicemail box.
„Chris, Arjuna here. It‟s really short notice. But I need the next couple
of days off. I need to get my head together. Can‟t go into any details. I
don‟t have anything urgent on that can‟t be re-scheduled. I‟ll see you on
Wednesday and explain. Call me only if I really need to come in.‟
I went onto the internet and started looking for a nearby Health Farm. I
found one that seemed to be the best, coming highly recommended.
Luckily it was off peak so I got a booking for three nights at Champney‟s
situated in the heart of Berkshire. I packed my things and drove up that
night. It was a lovely building, an old manor home. A gravel driveway and
with a big water fountain in the centre, just like the one that I had
imagined in my dreams with Rita and the children. There were large
mature oak trees, barren in the winter, how idyllic they would look during
the summer.
A daily massage and a spa treatment were included in the package. I
quickly booked them up, and looked through the brochure as to what
else was available. Tai Chi grabbed my interest. It was scheduled to take
place on Monday and Tuesday, exactly in between the spa treatments.
The room was comfortable supplied with many CDs of relaxing, soothing
music. I was soon asleep.
The full body massage was exactly what was needed. The rest of the day
I alternately swam up and down in the pool, sat in the hot tub, and
sweated it out in the sauna. The tension within my muscles was gradually
being soothed away. Whilst relaxing in the sauna, I overheard someone
say:
„Oh is that the time. I‟ve got to go.‟
„Where are you going?‟
„Tai Chi‟
„Tai Chi?‟
„Yes the instructor is an expert. I‟ve got to rush.‟
I glanced up at the clock situated above the swimming pool. The Tai
Chi class would start in another 15 minutes. I rushed out, showered and
made my way to Studio 4 where the Tai Chi class was going to be held.
It was medium sized studio room 20‟ by 20‟. About twenty people had
turned up, a mixture of different ages: mostly women. The instructor was
dressed in a white outfit, looking like the one that I had seen Aman

62
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

wearing in my dream. He was big man, over six feet six with broad
shoulders looking extremely muscular. He nodded at me. I nodded back.
„Hello my name is Adam. We are going to learn a few basic moves
today. Just space yourselves out. Give yourself plenty of room. Just look
and see what I do and listen to the instructions, just relax and let yourself
feel the Chi, the energy field that is around you.‟
Adam started off by bending his knees slightly and extending his arms
out in front of him and arching them around so that the palms of his
hands were facing his chest a few feet in front of him.
„This is called hugging the tree,‟ said Adam.
So it went on, as we went from one position to the next, explaining the
name of the move. All the moves were related to some plant position or
animal movement.
„Now we are holding the chi energy ball, now rotate it around like this,
can you feel something between your hands?‟
I mimicked Adam‟s movements.
„Do you feel anything?‟ asked Adam looking directly at me.
I looked at Adam and looked at the space between the palms of my
hands.
„Yes I do feel something, although I can‟t see anything. It‟s as if there is
a pair of repelling magnets strapped to the palms of my hands, pushing
them apart.‟
„That is the Chi energy ball,‟ said Adam in a matter of fact way.
„Now we are going to go through the butterfly movement.‟ Adam
moved his arms from one position to another, shifting his weight from
one foot to another, twisting his upper and lower body. The class
followed his every move.
„Do you feel something now?‟ Adam asked again, directly looking at me.
I wondered why Adam wasn‟t asking anyone else.
„Yes I do.‟
„What do you feel?‟
„I feel tingling in the ends of my fingers. I feel that they are shooting off
sparks of electricity.‟
„You are feeling your aura,‟ explained Adam.
As the session went on, I felt more and more relaxed. At the end of the
session I went up to speak to Adam.
„Hello. My name is Arjuna. I really enjoyed the session.‟ I held out my
hand to Adam.
Adam shook my hand with a firm grip and smiled.
„Glad you liked it.‟
„May I ask you something?‟
„Sure. Go ahead.‟
„Why did you keep on asking me, how I was feeling and not the rest of
the class?‟
63
 SECOND CHANCE

„Because of your aura. Your aura was different from that of the others.‟
„My aura?‟
„Yes. We all have an aura. It‟s an electric energy field. Some people can
feel it and see it, we all have one. Your aura was an electric blue and it
was being stimulated more than the others in the class. I knew that you
could feel something. I could see your aura being stimulated, especially at
your finger tips.‟
„How come you can see it and I can‟t?‟
„Just practice. I‟ve got to go. Are you coming tomorrow?‟
„Yes.‟
„Okay. See you then.‟ Adam shook my hands and went off.
I went to the library area where I had seen a number of computers
linked to the internet. I logged on and went on to the Amazon site and
started to look for books on auras and Tai Chi. One particular author
kept on coming up, Mantak Chi, it seemed that he was a very popular
author. I ordered that one and another one, on how to see auras. Two
other books caught my attention, ones that others who were interested in
this topic had also bought. The first was „Awakening the Buddha Within‟
by Llama Surya Das and the other one was a best seller „The Power of
Now‟ by Ekhart Tolle. Both books had excellent reviews. I ordered them
all, had dinner and went to bed.
I eagerly waited for the 4pm Tai Chi class. I got to Studio 4 a little bit
before four. I was a little surprised to see that the room was empty. There
was a note on the door: „Champney‟s regret that due to unforeseen
circumstances there will be no Tai Chi classes today.‟ I spent the rest of
the day walking around the grounds and relaxing in the library.
Wednesday morning. I was fully energised, by 7:15am I was in work,
busy going through emails catching up. At 7:35 there was a tap on the
door. It was Chris.
„Can you pop in for a sec?‟
„Yes sure. I‟ll be right along.‟
I entered into Chris‟ office a little apprehensive about what was going to
happen.
„Sit down.‟ I sat down next to Chris on his settee.
„Is everything okay?‟
„Well things have been a little bit rocky. I‟ve decided to stop seeing that
psychologist. I just need to clear my head. I‟ve been in a health farm the
last couple of days.‟
„Look I‟ve got a couple of books for you. I meant to give them to you
earlier but I just kept on forgetting. Clare and I found them really useful
in helping us to better understand each other. It saved our marriage. I
want you to sort yourself out. You need to be at your maximum level of
productivity. Just take today off and go through these books. We can
discuss them tomorrow if you like.‟
64
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

I didn‟t know what to say. Chris held out two books, Personality Plus
for Couples and Five Love Languages. I took hold of them, thanked
Chris and headed back to the flat.
I got back home and started to read the two books. There was a test in
the Personality Plus book which I quickly finished. I started to take notes
as I read Personality Plus. I did the same with Five Love Languages. By
three o‟clock I had finished both of them. I called Chris.
„Hi Chris. The books you gave me were amazing. We‟ve got to talk.‟
„I thought that you might find them useful. Look I have a pretty clear
morning. I need to go through my mail first which should be finished by
9. Come and see me then.‟
„Great see you then. Thanks.‟
I was in the office early again. I quickly sorted out the pending emails in
time for my 9 o‟clock with Chris.
„So what did you think of the books.‟
„Fantastic. The books my therapist recommended, „Road Less
Travelled‟ and „Families and How to Survive Them‟, convinced me that
Rita was some kind of psycho, who was making me go mad, and that my
Mum and Dad were the ones to blame. Rupert, my therapist, kept on
encouraging me to examine the past. Just wallow in self pity. I thought
that it would help.‟
I had wanted to tell someone all of this, I had so much pent up inside
of me which was bursting to get out. I carried on speaking as Chris
continued to patiently listen.
„But I can see now,‟ I continued, „that all that I ended up doing, was
feeling more and more sorry for myself, getting more depressed. All that
the books and the therapy did was to provide concrete reasons for my
depression. This meant that I now had a justification for my sorry shitty
life. I was going into a big black hole. Last week was terrible I was in a
complete mess. I was so angry at Rupert. He took me back to my first
moment of pain and rejection, it was terrible. Then he couldn‟t do
anything about it. He just told me that I would take a couple of years to
get out. I wasted so much time on that therapy crap. I can see now that
dwelling on the past is a complete waste of time. You can‟t change what‟s
happened. The whole theory is flawed.‟
„That‟s what I was trying to tell you. So which book did you like the
best?‟
„Both were great. They were not judgemental saying that one personality
was better than another. They simply stated that people were different
and that most of the time when you get married you could end up with a
partner with a different personality and requirements. So you may not
understand them, because you are trying to understand them from your
personality point of view.‟
„So what personality type are you?‟
65
 SECOND CHANCE

„I‟m a melancholy and I think that Rita is a sanguine.‟

„I would have guessed that. You like to structure everything around you,
and tend to focus on those things that can go wrong, whereas sanguines
are bubbly and like to have fun. That‟s probably what you liked about
Rita in the first place. Then you would have got annoyed with her,
because you would have felt that she was unrealistically optimistic and
wasn‟t grounded in the real world; and she probably got annoyed with
you because you were always so gloomy and pessimistic about things.‟
„I think you‟re right, Chris. It has got absolutely nothing to do with how
my Mum and Dad brought me up. It‟s irrelevant. I am the way that I am
and Rita is the way she is. I just need to understand our differences and
then realise that when she says something, she does not mean it like a
melancholy but like a sanguine.‟
„That‟s exactly right. Once you realise that you are different you can
begin to understand each other. What about five love languages?‟
„I know that my love language is words of affirmation and I think that
Rita‟s is probably quality time. I never spent much time with her because
I was working so hard so that we could have all the things that we
wanted. She just wanted to spend time with me. I was too tired to talk to
her. I just wanted to crash out in front of the TV. I can see that she
probably felt pretty unloved. She didn‟t know that my love language is
words of affirmation, and so she didn‟t realise how important it was to
tell me that I was doing a good job of being a husband. She probably
thought, looking at the way I behaved like a melancholy, that I had
everything neatly compartmentalised, and that I was organised enough to
do anything. She must have felt that I didn‟t need her words of
encouragement.‟
„You see how simple it all is.‟
„Yes I can see that. To think of all those hours that I spent reading
those books on psychology: penus envy, castration anxiety and the like.
Even if those theories were correct, what difference would it have made?
I would never have realised that Rita was a sanguine who simply wanted
to have more time with me. She probably does love me and probably still
loves me. I know that I love her. I just didn‟t know what she was trying
to communicate. And she probably didn‟t know what I was trying to do.‟
„That‟s absolutely correct. Clare and I came to the same realisation.
Once we realised that we were simply different, and that deep down we
really loved each other and that we still did love each other, the rest was
easy. Our therapy sessions took us down a completely wrong path. It
looks as if the same was happening to you.‟
„Absolutely! I wish I had come across these books earlier.‟
„Sorry. It just kept on slipping my mind.‟
„Get back to Rita and tell her what you told me.‟
„I will do.‟
66
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

„Can I expect your head to be back on work now?‟

„You sure can!‟
I bounced off the settee and headed back to my desk. The rest of the
day went by quickly. I knew that Rita would not be home from work until
after 7pm, so there was no point in leaving work early. It seemed to take
ages for the day to finish.
I was at Rita‟s place exactly at 7pm. I waited outside. Rita drove up to
the drive at 7:30. I wanted to get out of the car straight away, but I didn‟t
want to alarm her. I waited until she had gone in and settled down. I went
up to the door and rang the door bell. She opened the door.
„What do you want?‟ asked Rita, „I was worried about you.‟
„Can I come in?‟ I didn‟t wait for an answer and proceeded to enter the
house.
„What is it?‟
„Look I‟ve been an absolute idiot. I really love you. I just didn‟t
understand. I miss you so much. I have been such a fool. And I know
that you love me, the way that you took me to see Rupert.‟
„And I know that you love me,‟ said Rita, smiling a little.
„How?‟
„You still have my picture in your wallet.‟
„Oh honey. I‟m so sorry. Please forgive me. I want to come back.‟
„This is your home. But you must promise me something.‟
„Promise you what?‟
„If you come back do not ever leave me. If you do, then I will never
ever let you back. I can‟t go through this again. Do you promise?‟
„I promise.‟
I hugged Rita with all my might.
„Why did you come back?‟ asked Rita after a little while.
I went to the car and brought back the two books that Chris had given.
I explained the personality types and took Rita through the test. She was
a sanguine. Then I explained the Five Love Languages, and sure enough
her love language was quality time. I held her in my arms so relieved that
I had not lost Rita. I realised, for the first time, how much she loved me,
I looked back at the incredible optimism she had regarding our
relationship, allowing me to come and go. She really was a sanguine and I
truly was a melancholy.
We were a perfect match. We were made differently so that we could
balance out each other, the differences were complementary. She was a
sanguine to balance my melancholic tendencies, and I was a melancholy
to balance out her sanguine nature. Individually we were difficult to deal
with, but together we could be perfect. I was beginning to realise that
marriage was about learning from one another, accepting and embracing
our differences, to smooth out our personality flaws. The books „Road
Less Travelled‟ and „Families And How to Survive Them‟, also
67
 SECOND CHANCE

highlighted the differences between husband and wife, but rather than
help me see the benefit of being different, they highlighted the problems
that the differences caused. Those books had made me more and more
resentful of the differences between me and Rita. I now realised that
there was another, much more constructive way of looking at things.
It wasn‟t long before I was back together with Rita. There were many
times when Rita would say something that would upset me. In the past I
would have lost my temper. Now I was begin to realise that I had
probably misunderstood her. I would ask her what she really meant, and
after some careful questioning, I would realise that what she meant to say
was quite different from what she had actually said.
The same would happen with Rita. I would say something that upset
Rita. I realised that Rita most probably misunderstood. I would then try
and explain what I meant to say in a different way. In the past when Rita
was upset I would simply get angry, not understanding why she had got
upset.
I had forgotten about the books, on Tai Chi, Auras and Buddhism, that
I had ordered. They were upstairs gathering dust. A few months passed
by. It was late at night. I was trying to get to sleep. We were on a new
cable package that included the History Channel. What better way to
slumber than to watch the History Channel?
I was almost asleep when I realised that the programme was on re-
incarnation. I sat up in bed and adjusted the pillows. They were
interviewing someone, a teenage boy. His name was Edward Austrian,
living in Connecticut. From the age of four he was sickly with frequent
sore throats. A cyst, causing repeated infections, kept on appearing inside
his throat. They removed his tonsils when he was six years old. Whilst
recovering in hospital he told a story of being a soldier in the First World
War. As a soldier he was walking in a wood. Suddenly a loud shot rang
out and his throat started to fill up with a warm liquid. The soldier had
been shot in the back of the neck. The bullet had lodged in the place of
where Edward‟s cyst was. After recalling his story Edward was cured, the
cyst never came back. In the documentary Edward recalled all kinds of
details about the gun he was carrying; details that, so the documentary
claimed, a young boy could not have known.
They went on to interview Carol Bowman, an authority on Children‟s
past lives; apparently Edward was not the only one with such an
experience. Carol went on to tell a story about a five year old village boy
in India claiming to be the re-incarnation of a recently deceased head, of a
nearby Buddhist monastery. He kept on telling his parents that he had to
go home back to the monastery, they ignored him. One day he ran away,
his parents eventually found him at the monastery; their son was talking
to the monks, they were testing the boy to see whether he really was their
revered teacher. They laid out a large number of objects and the young
68
 EVOLVING SPIRITUAL BEINGS

boy was picking out the revered teacher‟s personal belongings. The
monks were stunned; the boy was a 100% accurate. The final proof was
when the boy ran into the dead monk‟s room, went straight behind the
bed and smashed into the wall with his foot to reveal a hiding place of the
old monk‟s most treasured possessions.
It was the same story that Krishna had told me several months ago.
The documentary concluded with Dr Brian Weiss, author of „Many
Lives, Many Masters‟ saying: ‗We are not physical beings occasional having a
spiritual experience, but we are evolving spiritual beings who from time to time have a
physical experience.‘ Dr Weiss had documented hundreds of patients vividly
recounting past life experiences. During the course of the programme Dr
Weiss mentioned Vivekananda and a few other names which I made a
note of. What I had dreamt was not so unusual; there were other people
who were recalling past lives. I was not going mad.

69
SECOND CHANCE

70
 5 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

The next day I went into the office and sent an email to Krishna: „Hi
Krishna. Trust that you are keeping well. When are you next in the UK?‟
Later on in the day an automatic email message came back saying that
Krishna was on holiday and that he would be back in a week. I had a UK
number for Krishna.
„Hello is that Krishna? This is Arjuna.‟
„No. I am his father. Krishna is on a course.‟
„Hello Uncle. I am his friend Arjuna.‟
„He will finish his course in a few days, you can call him then.‟
„Okay thank you. Can I leave you my number for Krishna to call me?‟
I left my mobile, home and work numbers with Krishna‟s father and
returned to work. That evening I noticed the piece of paper on which I
had written down the name, Vivekananda. I sat down at the computer
and went through the Encyclopaedia Britannica; there was a reference for
Vivekananda:
‗He was an activating force behind the Vedanta (interpretation of the Upanisads)
movement in the United States and England. In 1893 he appeared in Chicago as
a spokesman for Hinduism at the World's Parliament of Religions and so
captivated the assembly that a newspaper account described him as ―an orator by
divine right and undoubtedly the greatest figure at the Parliament.‖ Thereafter he
lectured throughout the United States and England, making converts to the
Vedanta movement.
On his return to India with a small group of Western disciples in 1897,
Vivekananda founded the Ramakrishna Mission (q.v.) at the monastery of Belur
Math on the Ganges River near Calcutta. Self-perfection and service were his
ideals, and the order continued to stress them. He adapted and made relevant to
the 20th century the very highest ideals of the Vedantic religion, and although he
71
 SECOND CHANCE

lived only two years into that century he left the mark of his personality on East
and West alike.‘
There was a cross reference to Ramakrishna, Vivekananda‟s
teacher, which read:
‗Ramakrishna fought against sexual passion and money. He believed that those
twin evils caused men to fail in achieving spiritual enlightenment. Later in life, his
objection to gold became so intense that it was said to have an allergic effect upon
him, and finally he could not touch metal of any kind. He rejected the idea of caste,
repudiating any kind of artificial social division.
He viewed Kali, the Hindu goddess of creation and destruction, as the supreme
manifestation of God. He called her the Divine Mother and worshipped her upon
becoming a priest at a temple devoted to her near Calcutta. He wept for hours at a
time and felt a burning sensation all over his body while imploring Kali to reveal
herself to him. Some attributed his condition to possession, madness, or a nervous
disorder, but exorcism and available medical treatments had no effect. Eventual
visions of Kali or other deities brought ecstasy and peace; he once described Kali as
―a limitless, infinite, effulgent ocean of spirit.‖
His relatives had hoped that his marriage in 1859 would be a steadying influence,
but the God-intoxication reappeared upon his return to the temple. He then began
12 years of ascetic exercises in various states of samadhi (self-induced spiritual
trance). Under the guidance of a wandering Brahman woman, he became
acquainted with Yoga and the practices of Tantrism. He also mastered the practice
of Vaisnava, which culminated in a vision of Sri Krishna. His initiation as a true
sannyasin (ascetic) came from Totapuri, a monk who taught him the philosophy of
Advaita; Ramakrishna quickly achieved the Nirvikalpa samadhi, in which a
person becomes one with the Eternal Brahman. It was at this time that he
acquired the name Ramakrishna.
In 1866 Ramakrishna followed the path of Islam and is said to have had a vision
of Muhammad. Later, as he studied Christianity, he apparently also ―saw‖ Jesus.
From these studies and visions he came to the conclusion that all religions are in
essence the same and all are true. His revelations became known throughout the
world. Thousands crowded near his Calcutta home to hear him speak. Though
famous he remained a basically simple man. He never wrote, but several volumes of
his sayings were later published by disciples.‘
I remembered seeing a book on the Upanishad‟s in Dad‟s book
collection. Mum and Dad were only fifteen minutes drive away.
„Hi Dad, how are you?‟
„You‟re looking better. Your Mum and I are both very happy that you
are back with Rita,‟ replied Dad.
„Thanks. Do you remember having a book on the Upanishad‟s?‟

72
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

„Yes. I bought it a long, long time ago, just after you were born. I tried
reading it. I couldn‟t understand a lot of it. It‟s all gobbledegook.‟
„Do you still have it?‟
„Somewhere.‟
I went up to the study, looking for the book. There amongst the
complete set of Charles Dickens and Sherlock Holmes‟ short stories was
a slightly tatty copy of the Upanishads.
„What‟s this Dad?‟ I asked pointing at several other books next to the
Upanishads.
„That book is on the Vedanta, it explains what is written in the Vedas.
The other one is the Bhagavad Gita; it narrates the conversation between
Krishna, god, and Arjuna. Krishna explains to Arjuna the meaning of life,
it‟s all in the Bhagavad Gita.‟
„Arjuna?‟
„Yes that‟s why your Mother and I named you Arjuna, after the Arjuna
in the Bhagavad Gita and Mahabharata. Arjuna was a great warrior. He
was the finest archer in the entire world. He was also very intelligent,
loved god, protected the poor and defenceless, and had a deep thirst to
know the meaning of life. Through his questions and Krishna‟s answers
we can also come to know the purpose of our life. I hoped that you
would have some of the same characteristics. I thank god that he gave
you wisdom.‟ Dad put his hands together and raised them towards the
ceiling, whilst closing his eyes and tilting his head back, in prayer and
thanksgiving to god.
„Can I borrow these books?‟
„Why this sudden interest?‟
„Oh. Just. Nothing really.‟
I said my good-byes and returned home with the books. I started to
read the Upanishads. After a little while I put it down and started the
Vedanta, a little while later I put that down and then started with the
Bhagavad Gita and soon closed the book up and put that down.
„What are you doing?‟ asked Rita.
„Trying to understand what is in these books. I can‟t make any sense of
them. They seem to go round and round in circles.‟
„You need a guru to guide you. You can‟t do it by yourself.‟
„Dad couldn‟t make sense of them either.‟
„Go to sleep,‟ with that comment Rita turned around and was soon fast
asleep.
I picked up the Upanishads and tried to go through it. As I read
through the pages I came across a verse in the Katha Upanishad: ‗This
sacred knowledge is not attained by reasoning; but it can be given by a true Teacher.‘
„Rita get up!‟
„What is it?‟ Asked a very sleepy Rita as she slowly opened her eyes and
saw me excitedly pointing at a book.
73
 SECOND CHANCE

„How did you know?‟

„Know what?‟
„That you need to find a teacher. A guru. How did you know?‟
„Everybody knows that. I‟m sleepy. Go to sleep,‟ Rita turned on her
side, and went back to sleep.
I ignored Rita‟s advice and continued reading: ‗He cannot be taught by one
who has not reached him; and he cannot be reached by much thinking. The way to him
is through a Teacher who has seen him: He is higher than the highest thoughts, in
truth above all thought.‘ I rested the book on my lap and closed my eyes in
an effort to concentrate on what I had just read. The book dropped from
my hands on to the bed, I was soon fast asleep.
Several days passed by. My mobile phone started to ring.
„Hello Arjuna speaking.‟
„It‟s Krishna. I got a message that you called.‟
„Yes. What course were you on?‟
„Vipassana. Remember I told you about it.‟
„Can we meet up?‟
We arranged to meet for dinner. I continued to have the same dreams,
but no longer woke up wheezing. My eyes would just open up when I got
to bit where I was being drowned, I would lay there motionless staring at
the ceiling for a while and then go back to sleep.
I was sitting at the Pizza Express in Harrow staring at my watch.
Krishna was ten minutes late. I had got there early, and was ordering my
third bottle of mineral water when Krishna turned up.
„Sorry I‟m late. Had trouble parking.‟
„Why don‟t you go through the menu and decide what you want. I‟ve
already decided.‟
Krishna stared at me briefly, took the menu from my hand and sat
down.
„I‟m having the Vegeteraina‟.
„I didn‟t know that you were vegetarian.‟
„Yes it helps with the meditation. It keeps you calm and patient. You
should try it.‟ replied Krishna with a slight smile on his face.
„Maybe. I‟m going for LaReine with extra anchovies.‟
I waved my arm at the waiter and gave the order.
„Are you in a hurry?‟ asked Krishna.
„No. Hungry.‟
Krishna was sitting silently, I wanted to talk.
„I was watching this programme on TV about re-incarnation. They
mentioned the same story that you told me about that boy in India being
a re-incarnation of some monk. I couldn‟t believe it, what a coincidence.‟
„There are no coincidences. You‟ve got to read this book „Celestine
Prophecy‟ when you get the chance. It‟s brilliant. There are no

74
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

coincidences is the first insight. There are ten in all, at least in the original
book.‟
„The TV programme mentioned this guy called Brian Weiss.‟
„Yes. He wrote this book called „Many Lives, Many Masters‟. That‟s also
worth a read,‟ interrupted Krishna.
„Then it talked about Vivekananda and the Upanishads‟, I continued,
„my Dad had a translation of the Upanishads, but I found it heavy going.
It said something about finding a true, teacher, a guru,‟ I stopped
speaking and looked straight into Krishna‟s eyes, he was smiling.
„Remember I told you about those dreams that I was having.‟
„Yes.‟
„I think there is some hidden message in those dreams; something to do
with my past lives. But I don‟t know how to find out. I couldn‟t make
sense of what was written in the Upanishads or in the Bhagavad Gita. If I
discuss this with anyone else, they‟ll think I‟m going nuts.‟
„Not everyone understands,‟ said Krishna reassuringly. Our pizzas
arrived. Krishna closed his eyes. His lips were moving he seemed to be
muttering something.
„What did you just do?‟
„Just a prayer.‟
„So, what do you think I should do?‟
„The problem you‟re having is a similar problem to the one that Buddha
had. You know that he was a Hindu prince, a real historical figure, born
in northern India around 500BC.‟
„No I didn‟t know that.‟
„Buddha was looking for some answers, and he couldn‟t get compelling
and convincing answers from the priests or from the scriptures the Vedas
and the Upanishads. So you are not the only one that can‟t understand
them. Buddha had the same problem. So he decided to meditate to find
the answer. The technique he used was the same one I‟m using. You have
to still your mind.‟
„So what did he find out?‟
„I‟m getting to that. He did a lot of meditation and he received the
answer, enlightenment sitting under a Banyan tree in a place called
Bodhgaya which is in Bihar, India.‟
„So what was the answer?‟
„He came up with four noble truths. Which are: that life is full of
suffering, you are the cause of the suffering, suffering can cease and the
fourth and final noble truth is that cessation of suffering is achieved by
following the middle path.‟
„Life is full of suffering. I‟ve read that. Yes I know. It was in this book
„Road Less Travelled‟, he said life was difficult, and there was a footnote
referring to Buddha. But the book was all about life being difficult
because other people screw you up, resulting in you developing psychoses
75
 SECOND CHANCE

and manias because of other people. It wasn‟t about you being the sole
cause of your problems. It was other people‟s fault.‟
„That‟s the problem Arjuna. People take something from here, and a
little from there and mix it all up simply to suit their own beliefs, and
then claim that it was something that Buddha, Christ or Mohammed
taught. In my experience, most of the time that Buddha is quoted in the
popular press, or by celebrities, or by the media it‟s totally out of context
and can often be contradictory to what he was trying to say. There‟s a
good book on the teachings of Buddha. I‟m trying to remember what it
is.‟
„What do you mean take things out of context?‟ I interrupted.
„I‟ll give you just one example. Buddha was so disgusted with the
practice of the Hindu priests and the difficulties of understanding the
Vedas and Upanishads that he completely rejected all of it. Buddha did
not believe in a god, as such. He believed in some kind of supreme spirit,
but not in a personal god. He was a non-theist; he was not quite an
atheist because atheists deny the existence of anything spiritual. So
Buddha does not believe in a god, Hindus however do believe in god,
they believe in many gods. So would you agree that Buddhism and
Hinduism are at odds with one another?‟
„Well yes. I didn‟t know that Buddha didn‟t actually believe in a god.‟
„Most people don‟t know this. But most Hindus will tell you that
Buddha was the reincarnation of Vishnu one of their gods. That does not
make sense to me, because why would Vishnu come and deny his own
existence? Most people go along with the Hindu explanation because they
don‟t really know what it was that Buddha taught. They know that he was
a good guy and preached love and tolerance; ergo he must be a good
Hindu. I don‟t want to bore you with all of this. There is a good book
which explains all of it. I just can‟t remember the title.‟
„I‟ve got a book,‟ I said, „„Awakening the Buddha Within‟ and another
one by a guy called Eckhart Tolle. I think that‟s called the „Power of
Now‟.‟
„Yes. That‟s the book I was thinking about „Awakening the Buddha
Within‟. The other one is supposed to be good to, although I‟ve not read
it. Go through them, you‟ll get the best explanation there. How come you
got them?‟
„I was doing some Tai Chi at this health farm, and I felt this tingling
sensation. The instructor told me that I was feeling my aura, so I went on
to Amazon looking for auras and I came across these two books. I‟ve
haven‟t read them yet.‟
„You should.‟
„So Buddha was a Hindu?‟
„Yes and no. Yes, he was born a Hindu but then rejected Hinduism and
became the first Buddhist. All of the wisdom is from India. That‟s why
76
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

you hear of so many people from India having spiritual powers. Haven‟t
you ever wondered why they all seem to come from India? Maharishi
Mahesh Yogi was The Beatles‟ Guru, then there is a Swami Rama who in
a medically controlled environment, created and then eliminated
cancerous cells at will from his arm, and Sai Baba.‟
„So what about finding a true guru?‟
„I don‟t know. I‟m happy with Vipassana. I don‟t know how to find a
guru, but somebody told me that when the time is right, your guru will
find you.‟
„This sounds crazy. I‟m not sure I understand. I know that my friends
won‟t. One of my friends, Martin, just doesn‟t believe in god at all. He‟s
got some great arguments and he is the kindest person I know. He‟d tell
me that I‟ve gone nuts.‟
„People will not understand. The people here are not spiritual. This
country is not spiritual. They think you are mad when you talk about
these things.‟
„Maybe I should go to India. There must be a guru there. That‟s right
for me.‟
„Could be,‟ replied Krishna.
„Why don‟t you get Big Group to transfer you?‟ continued Krishna with
a smile on his face.
„That‟s a good idea.‟
Krishna laughed, „I was just joking.‟
„Why not?‟ this could be a real possibility, I was sure that Chris would
help me.
„But you‟ve just got back with Rita. How is she going to feel about it?‟
„She‟ll love it in India.‟
I got into the office early the next day and logged onto Big Group‟s
intranet looking for vacancies. There was a vacancy for Business
Development position in India. I looked at the date that the vacancy was
posted. Just two days before. I muttered to myself: „There is no such
thing as a coincidence.‟ Krishna was right.
I went to see Chris and asked the procedure for seeking an internal
transfer.
„Why do you want to go to India?‟ asked Chris.
„I need to find out something. I don‟t know what I am looking for. But
I feel that I will find it in India.‟
„Sounds rather impulsive. Are you sure?‟
„Yes.‟
„How does Rita feel about it? You‟ve only just got back together.‟
„She‟ll love India,‟ I hadn‟t discussed it with her, but I knew I could find
a way to persuade her.
„What about the projects you‟re doing here?‟

77
 SECOND CHANCE

„Obviously I‟ll see them to completion. We could get Andy to work on

the new projects. I‟d assist, while he transitions in. He‟s keen to do what
I‟m doing and you felt that he had potential. Let me drop you a note
outlining the proposal. If you‟re happy that we can do this, then and only
then will I apply for the India post.‟
„Okay.‟
I went back and drafted a transition plan proposal to Chris. On the way
back home, I stopped to buy a huge bouquet of flowers, dropped into
Waitrose and picked up some chilled ready meals and a box of Rita‟s
favourite chocolates. I got home early, arranged the flowers in a vase, and
arranged the table for a candlelit dinner for two. Rita arrived from work
late, and saw the candlelit dinner.
„What are you up to?‟
„Nothing. Just wanted to say how much I love you,‟ she could see right
through me.
We sat down and had our dinner. Rita talked about what had happened
at work. I nodded patiently and gave the occasional grunt indicating that I
was paying attention. The dinner was over.
„Let me clear up,‟ I said, as I got up to clear the table, something which
I would never do normally, „you just relax.‟
„You are up to something.‟
I sat down.
„Well there is something.‟
„What?‟ asked Rita.
„Did you like it in India when we were on honeymoon?‟
„I loved the shopping.‟
„Would you like to go again?‟
„Is that where we‟re going on holiday?‟
„Not exactly.‟
„There‟s this job that‟s come up in India. It‟s a once in a life time
opportunity.‟
„What job?‟
„Business development. Rita do you want me to be happy?‟
„I want us both to be happy.‟
„I need to find out something. I need to find out what those dreams are
about. I need to go to India. I‟m going mad trying to figure it out. If I
don‟t go, I‟ll never find out. I need to find a guru, someone who can
guide me. You told me last night that I need to find a guru. I‟m not going
to find a guru here. I‟ve got to know. I feel so empty inside, so lost.‟
She did not look happy.
„What about my job?‟
„You can always get a transfer.‟
„It‟s not that easy. You‟re just running away again.‟

78
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

„I‟m not going straight away. It will be another three to six months
before it will happen. You‟re busy with your work. We hardly see each
other anyway. If you can‟t get a transfer then I‟ll get a transfer back.
Maximum we‟ll be six months apart. I‟ll be coming back to London every
four to six weeks whilst the new guy transitions into the job. Then you
can come and see me. We can work it out.‟
„You always make up your mind without involving me. We‟re supposed
to be husband and wife, a partnership, together you know.‟
I didn‟t say anything. I walked around the table and sat next Rita and
put my arm around her.
„Don‟t touch me,‟ Rita stood up and went up to the bedroom.
I put the dishes away and cleaned up, as quickly as I could, before going
up to the bedroom. Rita was lying on the bed, sobbing quietly. Her eyes
were red and swollen. I sat down on the bed next to her.
„Do you remember our first night, when I woke up shouting from that
dream?‟
Rita didn‟t say anything, but nodded her head.
„Do you remember how frightened you were?‟
Rita nodded her head again. She stopped sobbing.
„Those dreams really scare me. I don‟t want to have them ever again. I
want to find out what they are trying to tell me. I want to find out who or
what God is. Is he there or not there? I need to know. Something is
missing. Nobody has the answers here.‟
Rita sat up and rested her head on my lap.
„I‟m going to miss you. I can‟t go just like that. I promised Simon that
I‟d take the sales up to £5million. They‟ve been good to me. I just can‟t
up and go with you to India. I know that you have to go. I don‟t want
you to be frightened anymore.‟
I looked down into Rita‟s large brown eyes.
„I love you,‟ I lowered my head and tenderly kissed her.
Chris approved my transition plan and supported the transfer to India.
Within a few weeks my appointment as Business Development Manager
in India was confirmed. I would be based in Ahmedabad in Gujarat, a
city of four million people situated five hundred miles north of Bombay.
The transfer happened quicker than expected. I would go out in April,
Rita would come in the following January, once the financial year was
over and she had delivered her sales target.
The plane was making its final approach into Mumbai international
airport. I looked out of the window and saw a sea of small corrugated
roofs snuggling the airport perimeter. I had been told that one of the
largest shanty towns in India was in Mumbai next to the airport. It looked
just like the favelas I had seen in Rio. People are the same everywhere, I
thought. The plane landed with a thud. The hot Mumbai air and the smell
caught me by surprise. I tried to place the smell. I remembered when I
79
 SECOND CHANCE

was eight, surrounded by pigeons in Trafalgar Square coming to feed on

the box of seeds in my hand. It was the same smell kind of smell invading
my nostrils: damp rotting paper and pigeons. I found out later that the
smell came from the makeshift open sewers from the shanty slum next to
the airport, where half a million people lived without running water and
any sanitation.
A smiling security guard greeted me and asked the passengers to follow
him. It wasn‟t necessary as everything was well sign posted; large black
lettering on yellow boards in English as well as in Hindi.
I went down the escalators towards the immigration desks. The
immigration hall was nice and cool. The strange smell that had assaulted
me earlier had disappeared. There was just a small queue. I remembered
how long the queues were at JFK and other US airports, things seemed to
be a lot more efficient. I was nervous however. My parents had told me
that the Immigration officers would harass me, that they would demand
money. I was told that everyone would try to cheat me. I looked around,
I was next. I was somewhat reassured by a sign that gave a name and
contact number for any complaints. Another security guard was directing
people to the next available immigration booth. He pointed at me, and
motioned me to cubicle three.
I went forward and handed over my passport to the lady sitting in the
booth. I was a little surprised to see women immigration officers in India.
I smiled at her as she glanced repeatedly at my passport photo and my
face. She typed something into her computer. Put the passport under
some violet light, got out her stamp, stamped the passport, and that was
it. No questions, no fuss. The luggage arrival hall was just a few feet
behind the immigration desks. By the time I got there, my luggage was
waiting for me.
Within twenty minutes of leaving the airplane I had passed through
immigration, got my luggage, cleared customs and was on a bus taking me
to the domestic terminal for my connecting flight to Ahmedabad.
Everyone was smiling and helpful, not at all what I had been told. There
was a couple of hours wait for the connecting flight. A pretty young lady
dressed in a smart blue blouse and blue skirt escorted me to the Jet
Airways lounge. The lounge looked as if it had been recently refurbished,
a marble floor entrance opened out onto a large seating area. The light
wooden floor with sofas and wooden chairs gave it a light modern look.
Murals of large flowers hung on the surrounding walls giving it a
charming freshness. A young boy dressed in a white jacket came up and
asked what I would like to drink.
„Do you do cappuccino? I asked hesitantly, I didn‟t expect them to have
Cappuccino, no harm in asking.
„Certainly. We also have fresh sandwiches and somosas. Please help
yourself,‟ said the young man, with a large smile, pointing to a large tray
80
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

of sandwiches and a silver serving platter on which were several neatly

arranged small triangular shaped pastries.
I took a sandwich and one of the triangular pastries, a somosa, and sat
next to the window overlooking the airport apron with the parked
airplanes. The sun was shining and I was enjoying one of the best
cappuccinos I had ever tasted, in one of the nicest airport lounges I had
been in, surrounded by unusually cheerful airline and airport staff. India
was full of pleasant surprises!
The flight was on time and in less than an hour I was in Ahmedabad.
The plane parked about two hundred yards in front of the airport
terminal. I was the first to walk down the stairs on to the tarmac. It was
like walking into a furnace as the hot air blasted my face. The sun was
high in the sky and there was not a cloud to be seen. I started walking
across the tarmac towards the airport terminal; the baggage handlers were
already busy unloading the bags. By the time I got into the terminal the
bags were waiting for collection on the conveyor belt. So quick!
It was a small terminal building only about fifty feet wide and there
were no customs or immigration formalities. I walked out through the
sliding doors. A short path, protected by metal rails, led from the terminal
doors to the outside. I soon realised that the rails were there to keep the
masses of people that had arrived to greet their guests in some form of
order.
As I got to the end of the walkway seven maybe ten people came
rushing up and shouted „Taxi Sir‟, „Taxi‟, „Taxi‟. One of them tried to take
my luggage trolley, in his enthusiasm to win the business. A security
guard came up and raised his stick, the taxi drivers moved back but
continued to hold out their arms raising their fingers shouting out „Taxi‟,
„taxi sir‟. It reminded me of school, when the teacher would ask for a
volunteer for some delightful task, and I together with my classmates
would eagerly put up our hands and say „Please sir, choose me.‟
I was wondering who to choose, they all seemed so eager. I didn‟t want
to disappoint anyone. Just as I was about to choose, I saw a tall thin man,
wearing round metal framed spectacles with a pot marked face, slightly
balding, waving at me with one hand and holding a white placard with
BG written on it in large red lettering in the other hand. The man came
forward and in a language, that I didn‟t know, told the taxi drivers to
stand clear. They complied. He came forward and with an exceptionally
large grin, held out his hand and said:
„Mr Arjuna. Welcome to Ahmedabad. My name is Harshard Mehta.‟ He
shook my hand and handed me a business card. The card read Harshard
Mehta, Head of Government Liaison.
„Hello Harshard,‟ I replied, „delighted to be here.‟
„Let me take that for you. How was your flight?‟ asked Harshard, as he
took my luggage trolley, and wheeled it to the parked car.
81
 SECOND CHANCE

„Great. I couldn‟t believe how quickly and efficient the airport was. In
London it takes over an hour to get your luggage. Within twenty minutes
I was cleared of immigration and customs. The Jet Airways flight here
was also great, absolutely on time.‟
„India is a modern country you know. Everyone is surprised at how
efficient we are at some things. Sorry I was a little late. My driver decided
to go for a cup of tea and I couldn‟t find him, I was getting late so I
decided to drive my car to pick you up. It‟s a little small.‟
„Is it always this hot here?‟
„These next couple of months are the hottest. Then it gets cooler. This
is the car.‟
We stopped in front of a very dusty small blue coloured hatchback car,
slightly larger than a mini or Volkswagen beetle. The car had scratches all
along the side and a large dent in the rear passenger door. The rear brake
light and the left indicator lamp covering were broken.
I just stared at the car and then at Harshard. Harshard smiled back.
„Interesting. What make is it?‟
„It‟s a Maruti Zen. It‟s very popular here,‟ replied Harshard as he put
one suitcase in the tiny boot and the other suitcase on the rear seat.
I just about managed to squeeze my six foot frame into the car.
„You better put your seatbelt on.‟
I complied with Harshard‟s request. We left the airport and headed
down a large dual carriageway. There were small dust covered bushes
planted along the divide separating the carriageway. Small swirls of dust
were being whisked along the side of the road by the wind and the car.
„It‟s very dusty here.‟
„It only rains once a year for about a month. Last year it only rained on
one day. On that day we had our entire annual rainfall. The office was
completely flooded.‟
„What‟s that?‟ I said, pointing to an open plot of land that looked
greener than the rest of the landscape.
„That‟s the Armed Forces golf course.‟
We passed under a large blue board saying „Welcome to Gujarat.‟
Harshard was driving the little Maruti Zen as hard as it could go. The
engine was making a horrible screaming noise. We approached the
roundabout at the end of the dual carriageway at speed. There was a car
already on the roundabout heading straight at us, Harshard didn‟t seem to
notice and drove straight onto the roundabout and to the left, causing the
other car to break sharply.
„That was close.‟ Harshard was busy grinning.
„What was close?‟
„Didn‟t you see that car, it almost hit us.‟
„The road was clear. Don‟t worry I have never had an accident.‟ replied
Harshard reassuringly.
82
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

There were very few cars, but there were many cyclists and people
walking along the side of the road. Harshard was busy using his car horn
with which he was tooting everything and anything. We overtook a cart
being pulled by a camel.
„Did you see that?‟
„The camel. Yes there are many of those here. That is Gandhiji‟s
ashram,‟ said Harshard pointing to his left.
„Is that where Mahatma Gandhi lived?‟
„Yes that is where he started his freedom march for Independence from
the British.‟ Harshard was looking at me, his eyes off the road. He
momentarily stopped tooting the car horn.
Just then a car pulled out of one of the side roads. Harshard slammed
on the brakes. The other driver realising his mistake also braked hard.
The Maruti‟s tiny wheels locked and tyres skidded screeching along the
tarmac. Harshard desperately wrestled with the steering wheel trying to
keep it in control. I was thrown against the seat belt, certain that we were
about to collide. Harshard managed to turn the car sufficiently so as to
avoid hitting the car head on, but not enough to avoid the other car‟s
bumper scraping along my door. Harshard stopped the car and got out.
So did the owner of the other car.
There was a brief heated argument. Harshard looked at the new dent in
his car, complementing those that were already there. The other driver
saw that apart from a blue paint mark on his front bumper there was no
other damage. Harshard and the other driver shook hands after which
Harshard returned to the car with his customary large smile.
„I thought you said that you have never had an accident?‟ I asked, my
body covered with dust sticking to my sweaty clothes.
„That was just touching. Not an accident,‟ he responded cheerfully.
This guy was a total nutter! I double checked that the seatbelt was
fastened correctly.
„Is the hotel far?‟
I wanted to get out of the car as quickly as possible.
„We are almost there.‟
Harshard pulled into a large fourteen story building which had Fortune
Landmark written in big blue letters on the front.
„You must be tired. You can rest here. I will pick you up tomorrow
morning.‟
„No its okay. Just give me the address.‟
„It‟s no problem. I will come with my driver in a bigger air conditioned
car.‟
„Your driver will be here?‟
„Yes.‟
„Okay then can you come at 8:30?‟ I was relieved to be spared any more
of Harshard‟s driving.
83
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes sir. Goodnight.‟

The room was cool and comfortable on the twelfth floor. It was a relief
to get out of the Maruti and end the impromptu roller coaster style drive
from the airport.
Harshard turned up promptly at 8:30 in an immaculately clean metallic
gold Honda Civic.
„Good morning Sir. This is Pankaj he will be your driver while you are
here,‟ chimed Harshard.
„Did you sleep well?‟ he continued.
„Yes thanks.‟
Harshard asked Pankaj to take us to the office. Pankaj‟s driving was a
lot slower, calmer and he used the horn a lot less than Harshard. I sat
back in the seat and looked at the Ahmedabad traffic. There were more
cars than the previous evening, but still not that many, there were lots of
cyclists and people on motorbikes. Very few were wearing helmets.
„Why aren‟t they wearing helmets?‟
„It‟s too hot and uncomfortable. They are not necessary. Amdavadi‟s are
the best drivers in the world, they don‟t get hit,‟ grinned Harshard.
„I would like to meet the team and the rest of the Big Group personnel.‟
„That‟s exactly what has been planned. Then in the afternoon after
lunch I have arranged for us to meet with a few estate agents who can
show you some properties around Ahmedabad.‟
„Will you be with me?‟
„If you like.‟
„I would be more comfortable. I don‟t know what kinds of properties
are available here.‟
„You can either get a farm house, or a bungalow or be in an apartment
block.‟
„Maybe we can see one of each.‟
„I can arrange that with the agents.‟
We soon arrived at the office a large twenty story office block which
over looked the main river flowing through Ahmedabad. The river was
over two hundred feet wide but at this time of the year was completely
dry. The team had prepared a brief presentation on their current
activities. After lunch, I got back in the car with Pankaj and Harshard to
look for a place to call home whilst in Ahmedabad.
„Where are you from?‟ asked Harshard.
„I was born in Kenya, but I grew up in London. My grandparents are
from Gujarat.‟
„Do you speak Gujarati?‟
„Not really. My mother taught me some when I was young, but I‟ve
forgotten most of it.‟
„Why did you come to India?‟ Harshard was smiling again and looking
straight into my eyes.
84
 IN SEARCH OF SACRED KNOWLEDGE

I wondered whether or not to tell Harshard.

„I came for the job experience.‟
„Anything else?‟
„To find out what it would be like to live in India.‟
„Anything else?‟
„Why do you ask?‟
„I feel that there is something else that brings you here.‟
I remembered my conversation with Krishna, that there is no such
thing as coincidences. It was odd that Harshard would be asking such
questions, he didn‟t even know me.
„There is something else.‟
„Maybe I can help you.‟
„I‟m looking for someone.‟
Harshard continued looking at me. His smile was becoming bigger.
„This sounds strange,‟ I continued.
„You are a Gujarati. This is between me and you. Head office does not
need to know. You can trust me,‟ said Harshard reassuringly his bright
eyes twinkling back at me.
„I‟m looking for a guru.‟
„I can help you.‟
„How?‟
„I have a good friend Anand. He will help you find your guru.‟

85
SECOND CHANCE

86
 6 A GUIDE IS FOUND

That afternoon in the space of four hours Harshard and I saw several
places; a house in the countryside, a couple of bungalows and two of the
finest apartments that could be found in Ahmedabad. I quickly made up
my mind. There were more urgent matters to attend to. I decided on a
five thousand square foot apartment which had five large double
bedrooms, servant quarters and a spacious living area. I knew that Rita
would fall in love with the highly polished white Italian marble that
covered the entire floor, which gave the impression that you were walking
on clouds.
„Can we meet with Anand now?‟
„Yes we are going there right now to Azad Society where he lives,‟
replied Harshard.
Pankaj drove up to a dusty crossroad. On one side of the crossroad was
an open plot of land with a red apartment block, diagonally opposite the
apartment was another plot of common grazing ground. A few cows and
bullocks were quietly munching away, occasionally swishing their tails
trying to brush away irritating flies, not seeming to mind the fierce heat.
On the third corner of the crossroad were some bungalows, surrounded
by a large wall dressed in a blaze of burning bright red bougainvilleas. In
the remaining corner was a red three story building about sixty feet
across. A set of steps led to the first floor, on which were a number of
small shops, a stationer, a beauty parlour, a general store and a shop
selling confectionary. A gate on the side of the building led to another set
of open stairs up to the second and third floors. The second floor was
protected by the shade of a large limdi tree in front and a little to the side
of this block. The limdi leaves gave a faint citrus fragrance that wafted
onto the stairs from time to time, the limdi leaves were famed for their
medicinal properties.
87
 SECOND CHANCE

Harshard got out of the car and went to open the gate leading to the
first floor, but it was chained and padlocked. He called out to the owner
of the stationery store.
„Where is Anand?‟
„He‟s outstation.‟
„When will he be back?‟
„Maybe three days, maybe six.‟
Harshard returned to the car and broke the news to me.
„When will he be back?‟
„The shop owner doesn‟t know. We can try next week.‟
„Where is he? Can we call him to let him know that I want to meet
him?‟ I asked anxiously, not wishing to delay my meeting with Anand.
Harshard grinned at me.
„Only god knows where Anand is. You will meet him when the time is
right.‟
Harshard put his hand on my arm and gave it a light squeeze.
The following week went by a lot quicker than I had expected. It was
busy getting up to speed with getting to know the new team and
understanding the current business development activities. There were
lots of administrative details that needed to be taken care of; an interview
with the Police Commissioner to get clearance to stay in Ahmedabad as a
foreigner, and a compulsory AIDS test. I had to open a bank account,
register with a doctor, complete the negotiations with the landlord, find
furniture, and meet with various heads of Foreign Investment and
Infrastructure Development at Gandhinagar, the administrative capital of
Gujarat. Harshard as Head of Government of Liaison was very good at
his job, skilfully guiding me through all of the administrative complexities
and explaining all the protocols of how best to interact with senior
government officials.
I was sitting at my desk reading through a briefing paper on a company
that Big Group was interested in acquiring, when there was a knock on
the door.
„Come in.‟
Harshard opened the door, with his customary large, wide grin.
„Anand is back.‟
„When can I see him?‟
„Any time, you tell me.‟
„I‟ll be finished by five. Can we see him then?‟
„I will let him know.‟
Pankaj drove me and Harshard to Azad society. There was a man
dressed in jeans and blue shirt standing on the second floor balcony,
smoking a pipe carelessly looking at the world going past. He saw me and
the car and waved. I turned around to see Harshard waving back.
„Is that Anand?‟
88
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

„Yes.‟
„I thought that you said he was a truly spiritual person that could help
me.‟
„Yes. But he is very different. He smokes and eats meat sometimes. You
will like him.‟
I wasn‟t sure, as to whether Anand was the right person to meet, he
didn‟t sound as if he was very spiritual. The chain and padlock on the
gate had disappeared. Harshard pushed open the gate and led me up the
flight of stairs to the first floor. Anand was standing by an open door
with his arms open wide. Harshard went up to him, and the two of them
hugged each other.
„This is my friend Arjuna that I told you about,‟ said Harshard,
introducing me to Anand.
I walked up to Anand and held out my hand. Anand shook my hand
and said, „I am glad to meet you.‟
I found it difficult to tell exactly how old Anand was, I guessed
anywhere between early forties and mid fifties. He had a gentle smile on
his face and black twinkling eyes that radiated love and peace,
accentuated by a small dark round birthmark beneath his right eye. His
skin was tanned and dark, his sharp nose gave his face character, and his
hair was as white as wool, as white as snow. He was the same height as
me. His blue shirt was made of denim which loosely hung over his neatly
pressed jeans; a pair of simple open leather sandals adorned his sockless
feet.
He kept hold of my hand and cupped his left hand on top of mine,
closed his eyes and said:
„Some people call me Anand. You can call me whatever you wish.‟
His eyes dilated wide open; he smiled revealing a set of perfectly formed
teeth.
„Please come in.‟ Anand motioned us to come into his home.
„I have some errands to run. I will get Pankaj to drop me off and then I
will return the car. Is that okay with you?‟ asked Harshard.
I hesitated briefly, wondering what was happening.
„Yes off course. How long will you be?‟
„I will see you tomorrow. But Pankaj will be back here within 40
minutes.‟
„Okay. I think that will be fine. Well I will see you tomorrow.‟
Harshard was already walking down the stairs by the time I had finished
speaking.
„It will be okay,‟ said Anand reassuringly. „Please come in and make
yourself comfortable.‟
I walked into the room. The walls were painted blue; the floor had
cement tiles with a subtle mosaic pattern. A window, opening out on to
the main road, had yellow and blue stripes painted onto it, which were
89
 SECOND CHANCE

dappling the light entering into the room. There was no furniture in the
room, just a number of brightly coloured cushions and three cotton
mattresses. There was a picture, mounted on one of the walls, of an
oriental looking man in his late sixties wearing a pair of round metal rim
glasses. The picture had a small garland of flowers draped over it and a
smouldering incense stick was placed in a small hole at the bottom of its
wooden frame. The incense fragrance gently oozed across the room,
giving a serene feel to the entire place.
There was a stereo system on the floor, which had a dual tape deck and
a tuner. It was extremely dusty, and quite heavily scratched, it had once
been a matt black colour. I was staring at the stereo.
„I made that myself‟, said Anand with a smile.
„I‟m impressed,‟ I replied,
„Who‟s that?‟ I said pointing to a picture. It was a photograph of very
old man sitting in a meditative pose. The man‟s eyes were shut, his hair
had grown down to the ground, and his ribcage was showing through his
skin, his fingernails had grown so much that they were beginning to curl.
He looked ancient. It looked as if there was a beam of light shooting
from the top of his head right up into the sky, culminating in a star.
„Nobody knows who that is,‟ replied Anand, „it was a photo taken by
some climber in the Himalayas. He saw the strange light in the sky. See
the beam shooting to the star in the sky?‟ Anand pointed to the beam of
light in the picture. I nodded.
Anand continued the story, „the climber decided to investigate where
this beam of light was coming from. He stumbled across the place where
the light was shooting up from the ground and took a picture. He
eventually found the rest of the group and tried to take them back to
where he had been, but he could never find it. When he developed the
picture he was shocked to see the picture of this man, he couldn‟t see him
with his eyes when he was there, but the photographic film had picked it
up.‟
„Is that true? It sounds unbelievable.‟
„Many amazing things are true. There are so many things that we do not
know. Please sit down and make yourself comfortable. It might be more
comfortable if you removed your shoes. But as you wish, please consider
this as your home.‟
With that Anand sat down and motioned for me to sit down on one of
the mattresses next to the stereo system.
„I was expecting you. I have asked Kavita, my wife, to make some tea
for us, while we talk.‟
Just then a lady a little shorter than five foot came into the room. She
was wearing a white sari with a thin purple border around it. She had a
fair complexion and a round smiling face. Her dark eyes were youthful

90
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

and joyful, quickly darting from place to place. Kavita put down a tray
containing two teacups and a plate full of biscuits.
„Hello,‟ she said in a sing song sort of way.
„Hello‟, I got up and held out my hand to shake her hand.
Kavita laughed and shook my hand and said, „I will leave you two alone.
I have a tuition that I need to give.‟ With that Kavita left the room.
„She is a teacher and she gives tuitions at home for one or two
students,‟ said Anand, as a word of explanation, as to why Kavita would
not be joining us.
„Come please take some tea. I have been expecting you,‟ continued
Anand.
„Harshard would have told you,‟ I replied.
„No long before Harshard told me, I knew that you were coming. Relax
and say whatever you want to say, or if you just want to sit and say
nothing that is fine by me, dear. This is your home.‟
„Thank you.‟
I sat back on the mattress and rested on the cushion. Anand finished
his tea and then took out his pipe. He was sitting opposite me, his back
to the wall with his feet stretched out in front of him.
„I feel very comfortable here. I feel at peace,‟ I said, breaking the silence.
„I don‟t know what to say. Where to start? There is so much that I want
to say. I don‟t know why I would want to tell you these things. But I do
want to tell you,‟ I started crying as I finished speaking.
„I don‟t know why I am crying. Sorry,‟ I was ashamed to cry in front of
another man.
„Let it out. It is healthy to cry,‟ replied Anand, he seemed unusually
relaxed at having a complete stranger sitting in his home crying
uncontrollably.
„You might find it helpful to hit your chest like this,‟ Anand started
hitting the centre of his chest below the collar bone.
I ignored the advice and continued to cry.
„I don‟t know what has come over me.‟
Anand got up and switched on the stereo and pushed the play button
on the cassette deck. A soothing and somewhat haunting flute melody
filled the room. I lay down on my side along the mattress and rested my
head on the cushion, stopped crying and fell asleep.
It was night by the time I got up. The light in the room was off. I
switched on the light and looked at my watch. I had been asleep for over
three hours. Anand walked in, whilst I was still looking at my watch.
„I‟m sorry. I don‟t know what happened. I don‟t normally do that.‟
„This is your home. How are you feeling?‟ Anand had sat down, in
exactly the same position as before, with his back to the wall with his legs
stretched out.
„Do you want to ask me something?‟ asked Anand.
91
 SECOND CHANCE

„So many things. But I don‟t know where to begin.‟

„If you permit me. I would like to be your guide on your journey.‟
„Like a guru?‟ I asked.
„Yes you could say that. We will go on this journey together.‟
I wondered what to say next. This was all getting very spooky. I put my
hand into my trouser pocket. My wallet was still there.
„How much do you charge?‟ I asked hesitantly.
Anand had a big smile on his face. „There is no charge. This is your
home.‟
I was not expecting such a reply.
„Let me think about it.‟
„As you wish. Would you like to have dinner with us? The food is
ready.‟
„No thanks. I better be going. Did the driver come back?‟
„Yes he is waiting downside. As you wish,‟ Anand got up.
I got up and held out my hand. Anand held my hands in his, Anand‟s
hands were warm, oozing out love and friendship.
„I have enjoyed meeting with you,‟ said Anand as he gently squeezed my
hands, „this is your home.‟
„Thank you. Please say good bye to Kavita for me.‟ With that I turned
away, opened the door and went down the stairs for his waiting driver.
I got home and called Rita.
„Hello darling how are you?‟
„Had a very busy day at work. How is India?‟
„I met someone today.‟
„Who?‟
„His name is Anand. He is a friend of Harshard. You know the guy who
I told you about that is helping me out. Anand asked me if I wanted him
to be my guru.‟
„What did you say?‟
„I said that I‟d think about it. I was a little freaked out; when I went into
his house I started feeling very sad. You remember how I was when I just
couldn‟t stop crying and then you drove me to see Rupert.‟
„I remember.‟
„Well I started to feel the same thing. I started to cry and I couldn‟t help
myself. Then he put on this music. The moment I heard it, I was calm
and just went to sleep. I can‟t explain it. Should I let him be my guru? I
don‟t know what to say to him.‟
„You should make up your own mind. I know you find it difficult, but
you must listen to your heart. Don‟t try and analyse it.‟
„What do you mean, listen to my heart?‟
„There see. You are trying to analyse things. I‟ve got to go. I haven‟t
eaten all day. I love you.‟
„I love you too.‟
92
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

The next day I got Anand‟s phone number from Harshard and called
him.
„Hello is that Anand? Arjuna speaking.‟
„This is Anand.‟
„I would like you to guide me.‟
„I am honoured to be your guide. Come to my home on Saturday
morning at 8:30. You will spend the whole day with us.‟
„Do I have to bring anything?‟
„No. We have everything that we need right here.‟
The week went quickly. There were lots of meetings and decisions to be
made as to which acquisitions to concentrate on. There wasn‟t much time
to think about what would happen on Saturday, or even if I had made the
right decision. Every day was a crisp sunny day in Ahmedabad. The sun
was bright and the skies were a pale blue, not a cloud in sight. I arrived at
Anand‟s place just a little before 8:30. Anand opened the door. He was
wearing jeans and a white cufni, a single piece cotton top rather like a T-
shirt except it usually had long sleeves and was loose fitting, an ideal piece
of clothing to wear in this hot weather.
„Welcome,‟ said Anand with a large beaming smile.
I smiled back, shook Anand‟s hands and sat down next to the stereo
system after removing my shoes.
„I am glad that you are making yourself at home. This is your home. Do
you have any questions?‟ asked Anand.
„I don‟t know what to expect. I don‟t even know whether I should really
be here. But something told me, deep inside, that I should come. I feel so
happy and at peace here.‟
„There are good vibrations in this room,‟ replied Anand, „this is where
we do the meditations. The vibrations of the meditations have left their
echo in this room. That is why you feel so much at peace here. Shall we
begin?‟
„Yes,‟ what a strange explanation to give, I thought to myself, how
could meditations have echoes?
„But first we shall have some tea.‟
Just then Kavita breezed into the room smiling, accompanied by the
clinking of the tea cups and a plate of biscuits.
„I have to prepare lunch,‟ said Kavita. Off she went back to the kitchen
leaving Anand alone with me.
„Kavita makes a good cup of tea.‟
„Yes she is a very good cook,‟ replied Anand, „she is preparing
something special for us to eat at lunch time.‟
We finished our tea, in contemplative silence. Anand took the empty
cups and plate back to the kitchen and returned.
„Let us begin. I am going to teach you an ancient meditation technique.
It is called Reiki. Rei Ki means universal life energy. It is the energy force
93
 SECOND CHANCE

that Buddha tapped into to reach enlightenment. For many years this
ancient art of meditation was lost. Then in Japan there was a teacher, his
name was Dr Mikao Usui. He was born in 1865. That‟s his picture there.‟
Anand pointed to the picture of the oriental looking man that I had
noticed the other day.
Anand continued giving the background to Reiki: „He was a teacher in a
Christian school. One day his students asked him how did Jesus perform
all these miracles in the bible? Dr Usui could not give an answer, and
started to meditate on how this could be. For many years he looked for
the answer going from one place to another. He was getting more and
more frustrated and more hungry to know the source of Jesus‟ power.
Finally, he came across an Abbot at a Zen monastery who allowed him to
study the secret writings of the Buddhist Sutras. It was within these
Sutras that he found the formulas and symbols for healing, yet it was not
enough as he did not know how to activate these symbols. The Abbot
advised Dr Usui to go to Mt Kurama and meditate there. Dr Usui
decided to take the advice and went to Mt Kurama near Kyoto, a
mountain that was known to have good spiritual energy. He spent twenty
one days and twenty one nights on that mountain, he was exhausted and
very weak at the end of it. He was about to give up, when he saw a beam
of light coming towards him at great speed. He grew very fearful at this
display of spiritual power, yet he knew it must be the answer he was
looking for. He remained very still and waited. This great light came and
struck Dr Usui in the forehead, overwhelming him until he lost
consciousness. His spirit left his body and he was shown beautiful
rainbow coloured bubbles of light, each containing symbols he had seen
in the Sutras. The lights entered his body and he was shown the mantras,
the symbols and attunements for activating healing in others. Dr Usui
heard a voice say „Do not forget this, these are the keys to healing, do not
allow them to be lost‟. Sometime later, he regained consciousness. He
was very excited about what had happened and wanted to tell the Abbot
of his experience. In his haste he tripped and fell, badly cutting his foot
on a sharp rock nearby. Blood immediately began to flow from the
wound. Dr Usui placed his hand on the cut and felt great warmth flow
from his hand to his foot. Within minutes the blood stopped flowing, the
pain ceased and the wound was completely healed. Dr Usui returned to
the monastery and found the Abbot in bed suffering from a bad attack of
arthritis. Dr Usui held the old man‟s hands while he spoke of his
experiences on the mountain. Within a short time all the pain from the
arthritis had gone.
Dr Usui remembered what he had seen and heard, and made a note of
them and then began teaching others these symbols, mantras and
attunements. He called the whole system Reiki. One of his disciples was a
lady called Mrs Takata. Mrs Takata moved from Japan to the United
94
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

States where she started to teach Reiki, that is how it came to the West.
Then one of her student‟s students another lady called Paula Horan
brought Reiki to India. So what started in India with the Buddha went to
Japan, then to America and back to its home here in India. What I am
about to teach you is a secret that can only be passed on from a true
teacher to a true student. You are not to repeat any of the mantras or
symbols to anyone else, nor are you to discuss them with anybody else.
There is tremendous power in this technique and if you are not properly
taught or attuned, you could end up doing great harm to yourself and
others. Do you understand?‟
„Yes I understand,‟ I replied, trying to absorb what I had been told.
„Do you have any questions?‟
„This is the technique that was used by Jesus to heal others?‟
„Yes. Jesus was a supreme Reiki master. It was initially developed by
Buddha and still practiced in India. When Jesus was a young man he
came to India to learn this technique and then he returned back to his
home. That is how he turned water into wine. Some Reiki masters have
used this technique on a glass of water and within 24 hours the water has
turned red. Jesus just had more spiritual energy. He used this technique to
heal others.‟
„Have you healed others with this?‟
„Yes there have been many. Some people of back ache, others of
cancer. They have been in this room and some of them have been in the
US, I use remote healing for them. You will be able to have the same
healing power.‟
„What about Buddha. Did he use this technique? Is this the same as
Vipassana?‟
„Buddha did use this technique. It is not the same as Vipassana.
Vipassana is for self actualisation and seeking knowledge. Reiki is for
healing, for self and for others. They have different purposes but the
source is the same supreme spirit. I can also teach you Vipassana, but
first you have to purify and heal yourself. The process of purification has
already started when you came here and started crying. That is how I
knew that you were ready for Reiki. I select my students, they do not
select me.‟
„What is attunement?‟
„I will come to explain that. You have different chakras in your body.
These chakras are psychic energy centres, each energy centre has a light, a
Varna, and a sound vibrational frequency, called the bija mantra,
associated with it. By concentrating on a particular light frequency and
sound frequency you can tune in and tune up a particular chakra. It is the
same principle that people use to tune a guitar, there is a tuning fork
which has a particular frequency, all that you have to do is strike the

95
 SECOND CHANCE

tuning fork and then adjust the tension on the guitar string until it is
vibrating in harmony with the fork.‟
„It‟s as easy as that? What do you mean by a light and sound vibrational
frequency?‟
„Yes it is quite simple. The critical point is concentration. If you cannot
concentrate, which is equivalent to clearly hearing the sound of the tuning
fork, then you will not be able to align your chakras. A light vibrational
frequency is a particular colour and a sound vibrational frequency is the
sound of a mantra. There is also a god associated with each of these
chakras.‟
„Where and what are these chakras?‟
„There are seven major chakras and thousands of minor chakras. The
major chakras run roughly along the centre of your body. The first chakra
is located at the base of the body at the perineum muscle. It is called the
mooladhara chakra, the sound is Lum and the colour is red. It controls
the energy flow to the reproductive organs, kidneys, spinal column and
adrenal glands. This relates to our desire to live and our basic survival
instincts. The god associated with this chakra is Brahama, the creator.‟
„Where is the perineum muscle?‟
„Between the penus and your anus, in women it is between the vagina
and the anus. Just concentrate on that area. Think of the colour red and
just start to say lum, over and over again. Start now.‟
I closed my eyes and started to say lum, over and over again. Anand
also started saying lum. I adjusted the pitch of my voice until I was
chanting lum in tune with Anand. I was frowning with concentration, this
soon dissolved away into a smile.
„What did you feel?‟ asked Anand.
„Nothing at first. But then when you started saying lum I began to tune
into the way you were saying it, then I started to feel something
happening at that muscle point. A sort of tingling, the tingling turned into
a rhythmic pulsating sensation which I was beginning to enjoy when you
stopped saying lum and asked me what I felt.‟
Anand laughed.
„There is plenty of time to enjoy meditation. We have a lot of ground to
cover. I have not told you about the other chakras. This is where your
Kundalini is located. It is a very powerful energy force which I did not
want you to stimulate too much; it can fry your brains if you do not know
what you are doing. It is like a coiled serpent, when activated it uncoils
and stimulates all of the chakras along the spinal column up to the brain.
It is like putting 6,000 volts through an ordinary light bulb; the light will
be exceedingly bright and then blow up. You have to train yourself first
to take the energy release.‟
„Sounds scary.‟

96
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

„Yes, that is why I stopped you. Do not practice this on your own, until
I tell you that you are ready. You were feeling the beginnings of a spiritual
orgasm. That is why you were enjoying the feeling and starting to smile.
This is the basis of tantric sex, to stimulate the mooladhara chakra and
awaken the Kundalani, stimulating every one of your senses. Some of the
rishis learn to have very controlled sex, storing up sexual life energy by
getting to the point of ejaculation and then holding back. It is the basis of
the Karma Sutra. I stopped you the moment that you started to smile. It
was a safe place to stop.‟
„Do you know how to do tantric sex?‟ I asked eagerly.
Anand smiled back. „There are safer ways than tantric sex to experience
the cosmic divine.‟
„I was letting you feel the power of what you are about to unleash on
this journey that you are about to commence,‟ continued Anand.
„Is this one of the mantras and colours that Dr Usui saw in his vision?‟
„No. These are the basic harmonics, the bija which means seed or you
can call it the root. They are used for general tuning and alignment. They
are not very powerful, that is why you can find these in any book. If you
do not get the sound right or the colour right you will not do yourself any
harm. That is why I asked you to start without any training. The Reiki
symbols and mantras are a lot more powerful and that requires special
training and initiation. Can we continue, dear?‟
„I am ready,‟ I replied.
„The second chakra is situated at the base of the spine. About three
fingers below the belly button. It is called the swadhisthana or hara
chakra, the colour is orange and the sound is Vum. This is the seat of our
personal power; it controls power to our sex organs, our sexual drive and
immune system. The god is Vishnu, the preserver.
The third chakra is situated in the solar plexus. It is where the rib cage
meets the lower chest, near the belly button. It is called the manipura
chakra, the colour is yellow and the sound is Rum. This is related to our
self image and self esteem it controls power to our digestive organs, the
gall bladder and pancreas. The god is Rudra, the thunder god associated
with Shiva the destroyer.
The fourth chakra is situated near the heart. It is in the centre of our
chest. It is called the anahata chakra, the colour is green and the sound is
Yum. This is related to our ability to love and give, it controls power to
our circulation, the heart, lungs and thymus gland. The deity is Isha.
There is an auxilary chakra associated with the heart chakra which is
situated on the top of the thymus gland. It is five finger widths above the
heart just below the collar bone. It is called the thymus chakra; the colour
is aqua or sky blue. This is related to our ability to fight of negative
influences, it controls power to our immune system. If you are feeling
very sad and start to cry, then begin to beat your chest at the point where
97
 SECOND CHANCE

your thymus gland is located you will immediately start to feel better. You
will have seen Muslim people beat their chests when they are in
mourning; they are massaging their thymus glands. Next time you feel sad
try this and you will feel better.‟
„I will give it a go.‟
„The fifth chakra is situated at the throat, where your thyroid and
parathyroid glands are situated. It is called the vishuddhi chakra, the
colour is deep blue and the sound is Hum. This is related to our ability to
communicate and speak, it controls our ability to achieve success and lead
others. The deity is Sadasiva.
The sixth chakra is situated in the middle of the eyebrows. It is also
known as the third eye. Your pituitary gland, which controls your physical
growth, it is behind the third eye. It is called the ajna chakra, the colour is
indigo and the sound is Om. This is the seat of intuition or clairvoyance.
This is related to our spiritual growth, meditation on this chakra enables
us to quickly burn away negative karmic energy. The deity is Paramasiva.
The seventh chakra is the crown chakra and is located at the top of your
head. It is also known as the thousand petal chakra. Your pineal gland
that controls your body clock through the secretion of melatonin and is
active during darkness is located directly below this chakra. It is called the
sahasrara chakra. It is multi-coloured. This is governs our spiritual
potential. It is the point at which we are connected to the Reiki energy. It
is where the god Shiva lives, the destroyer of all illusion and connection
to this physical world.‟
„So how do all of these chakras fit in with Reiki?‟
„That is a good question. When your chakras are in complete alignment
you will reach physical, emotional and spiritual perfection. Physically
because all of your glands will be working optimally, at which point any
illness in your body will dissolve away. This is how the healing is
accomplished, by balancing out the appropriate chakras. Your physical
state is a manifestation of your emotional state. Meditation and
attunement deals with your emotions, it eliminates all of the pain and
sorrow that is currently inside of you by burning it all up with the sound
and light vibrations. It is just like using ultrasound vibrations to blast
away kidney stones, except we are using spiritual sound and light
vibrations to destroy those negative emotional „stones‟. Finally you will
reach spiritual perfection because you will have opened the locked gates
inside of you, and have connected your soul directly to the great cosmic
divine. Your chakras are like a combination lock. If all of them are tuned
in correctly the whole energy flow from your mooladhara chakra, from
your perineum, will flow to the lotus crown chakra, straight to your head.
When the kundalini Shakti, or power, unites with Shiva you will
experience extreme bliss, a state of super-consciousness and the highest
knowledge.‟
98
 A GUIDE IS FOUND

„Wow. It sounds amazing.‟

„Yes and it is very simple. I am going to teach you three special symbols
and mantras. You will repeat each one of these symbols and associated
mantras over twenty four points on your body. You will place your hands
on top of each other over that point saying the three symbols and holding
it for three minutes. These points will be over all your major chakras,
except the crown chakra, as well as over some of the other energy flow
points. You must do all twenty four points; that is seventy-two minutes in
one sitting. This must be done once a day for twenty one days
continuously for the purification to work. Are you ready to commit to
that?‟
„Yes I am ready. Can I do the meditation any time of the day?‟
„Yes anytime. Better to do it at dawn or at sunset.‟
„What about this attunement what is that?‟
„The attunement deals with your crown chakra. This is a special and
very sensitive area. There are special symbols and mantras that I will use
to open up your crown chakra so that you can receive the Reiki energy. I
will open up your crown chakra slowly so that you can receive the energy
without doing harm to yourself. Shall we start the instruction?‟
„How come you know so much about these different glands and how
your body works?‟
„You will realise that as you progress in receiving Reiki energy, your
knowledge automatically increases. The cosmic divine is the source of all
knowledge, once you are connected there is no limit to how much you
know.‟
„Amazing.‟
„Before we start there are five principles which you must learn and
adopt to get the full benefit of Reiki.‟
„What are they?‟
„The first principle is “Just for today I will be in the attitude of
gratitude”. The second is “Just for today I will not worry”. The third is
“Just for today I will not anger”. The fourth is “In your daily work be
honest to yourself”. The fifth and last principle is “Just for today I will be
kind and respectful to all creation”. You have to do it just for today.‟
„They sound like good principles. I want to have those principles in my
life. I feel that is going to help me find the answers that I am looking for.‟
„Yes you will increase in knowledge, you will learn more about the
divine spirit. It will instruct you.‟
„I am ready to learn the symbols and mantras.‟
„Remember what I teach you now, you are not meant to share with
anyone outside of this room. It is very powerful and very dangerous.‟
„I understand.‟
„We will have some tea before we start.‟

99
 SECOND CHANCE

Just then I heard the clinking of tea cups followed by a smiling Kavita
with two cups of tea and some more biscuits.
Anand went into the back room and brought out a small black board
and different coloured chalks. He also had a small pad and some pens
which he gave to me.
„Let us begin. This is the first symbol‟, Anand slowly drew the first
symbol on the board with a blue coloured chalk.

100
 7 AURAS AND PROPHECY

I sat patiently copying the three symbols on to the notepad, memorising

them by repeatedly drawing the symbols out. Anand taught me the
sounds that went together with the symbols. Some of the sounds were
strange.
„You must say the mantra exactly the way that I say it, or it will not
work, dear.‟
Time and time again, Anand patiently repeated the sounds, to help me
get the sounds just right. I was a slow learner, and struggled to get the
sounds just right.
It took me an hour to learn the symbols and get the mantras sounding
just right. Kavita came in with another tray of teas and biscuits.
„Come, dear, let us have some tea before the initiation,‟ said Anand with
a big smile.
„What is going to happen at the initiation?‟ I asked.
„Don‟t worry dear, you will be perfectly safe. You just have to sit and
relax. I will do all the work.‟
I shuffled uneasily, slowly sipping the tea. Anand put on the tape player.
„This music will help you, dear. It is Harish Chaiprasad. He is an
excellent flute player.‟
It was the same haunting flute melody that I had heard the first time
when I had come to visit Anand. The music had a strange soothing
mesmerising effect on me just as it had done the first time I came to visit,
but this time I did not go to sleep. After several minutes the music was
briefly interrupted by the sound of a cymbal.
„What was that? I didn‟t hear that before.‟
„I have put that in. It is there to let you know that you need to move to
the next point for meditation. I have to quickly teach you the different
points where you need to place your hands and then we can start the
101
 SECOND CHANCE

initiation. You have to place your hands on different parts of your body
for a minimum of three minutes to allow time for the Reiki energy to do
its work. Last time you were asleep within three minutes so you didn‟t
hear the cymbals.‟
„What if I keep meditating on a spot for longer than three minutes?
Will I end up frying something inside me, like the light bulb blowing up
with all the excess electrical energy?‟ I asked nervously.
„No dear. This Reiki energy is quite safe. The meditation will just take
you longer to finish.‟
I finished the tea and Anand began to show and explain the different
points for meditation.
„I shall quickly show you all the 24 points, you should meditate on each
of these points for three minutes drawing the three symbols and chanting
the associated mantra. You need to place both of your hands palm facing
down on the point with your eyes closed and visualise white light flowing
from your hands onto your body on to that point.‟
„Is there a certain order that I have to do them?‟
„Yes there is. It is not critical but you will get better results if you do
them in the order that I show. You must do this in the morning ideally at
dawn and in the evening ideally before sunset, and once you start you
must do it continuously for 21 days otherwise it will not work.‟
„A bit like taking a course of antibiotics. My doctor always tells me that
I have to finish the course to get the benefits.‟
„Yes dear.‟
Anand showed me the twenty four points starting with the head and
ending with the feet.
„Have you got that?‟
„Let me see if I remember,‟ I replied, as I went through each of the
points in turn.
„Very good, dear. Now what I want you to do is just the eight main
points.‟
„Which points are those?‟
„These are the ones that correspond to your main chakras. But never
give Reiki to your crown chakra on your head – you must leave that one
alone. The main points are the back of your head then your forehead and
opposite your forehead at the back of your head covering your third eye,
then your throat, the top of your chest, where your thymus is located,
your heart, your stomach, just below your belly button and then over
your groin. I want you to do these eight points in time with the music
while I go and ready the initiation room. Don‟t go to sleep while doing
this,‟ chuckled Anand.
„I‟ll try not to.‟
Anand switched on the flute music and left the room. I started with the
first point, my hands at the back of my head. I imagined that it would
102
 AURAS AND PROPHECY

take ages for me to complete all eight points. But the twenty-four minutes
flew by. Just as I was finishing the last meditation point I felt Anand‟s
hand on my elbow lifting me up.
„Open your eyes and follow me.‟
I got up and followed Anand out onto the balcony and into the room at
the end of the balcony on the far side of the building. Anand opened the
door, I looked in. The room was very dark with just the dim flickering of
two candles resting on some kind of table either side of far wall. In front
of the wall there seemed to be a chair facing the wall and the two candles.
Anand took me by the arm into the room.
„Just sit here, relax and close your eyes. Just lose yourself. Do not think
but just feel,‟ said Anand, as he sat me down in the chair.
Anand muttered something, then the sound of a cymbal, some more
muttering another cymbal sound, and then Anand‟s hands pressed down
on the top of my head. I kept my eyes closed it was dark all around but I
could sense the flickering of the two candles on either side of the wall
that I had seen earlier. The two lights suddenly got brighter and then
started moving around the room, randomly and quickly. I wasn‟t sure
whether I was awake or dreaming, it was as if the lights had wings, two
brightly lit fairies merrily zooming around the room. I tried not to think
about it too much and just experience the sensation. I then felt Anand
lifting up his hand and placing his hand on top. The fairy lights zoomed
to the back, going out of view. They didn‟t come back.
Some more muttering and the sound of cymbals.
„You may open your eyes and get up from the chair.‟
I got up and saw that the candles were in the same place that he had
seen them when he walked in the room. I half expected to see the fairies
hovering at the back of the room, but they weren‟t there either.
Anand opened the door and led me out and back to the front room.
„What did you experience?‟ asked Anand.
„Well I‟m not sure.‟
„Did you feel hot or cold, or see anything?‟
„I was comfortable. I don‟t know whether I was imagining it or what it
was, but I thought I saw two lights moving around in the room when you
placed your hand on my head.‟
„Anything else?‟
„No that was it. Then the two lights went behind me and I didn‟t see
them again.‟
Anand smiled.
„What were those lights? Were you taking the candles and going around
the room?‟
Anand laughed.
„No my dear. The candles stayed in front of the room, it was only me
moving around.‟
103
 SECOND CHANCE

„Did you see the lights?‟ I asked.

„Not this time,‟ replied Anand, „but I have seen them.‟
„What are those lights?‟ this was all getting very strange.
„You are very lucky to see those lights. Not everyone sees them. That
was the spirit of my guru who passed away five years ago. He comes to
bless those that he believes are special. Perhaps he may have known you
in your past life and you have been drawn here to me by him so that you
can complete your path to self-realisation.‟
I wondered whether to believe him or laugh. I had experienced
something. I wasn‟t sure whether it was just my imagination or something
else. It had been a while since somebody had considered me special.
What if, Anand was right, that I was a long lost disciple, and that my
entire life thus far had been for the sole purpose of finishing my journey
to self realisation. It just didn‟t seem rational, but lots of crazy things
were happening in my life which didn‟t make sense.
„Let us have lunch and then we will be finished for today.‟
Kavita had prepared a curry of potatoes and peas, some rice, dahl (a
lentil based spicy soup served together with the rice), some rotis and
copra pak (shredded coconut, cane sugar, raisins and sliced almonds
cooked together and formed into oblongs like flapjacks).
„This food is delicious,‟ I said, as I helped myself to another portion of
curry, roti and copra pak.
„You can come and eat with us at any time. Just let me know and I will
make some extra for you,‟ replied Kavita with a large gracious smile
pleased at receiving such a compliment for her cooking.
„Is that the end of the training?‟ I asked, after the meal was over.
„No, it is just the beginning. We will meet again tomorrow morning.
Tonight practice the symbols and mantras over the 24 points as I showed
you. Tomorrow we will do the meditation together and I will have a small
surprise for you. I also have to give you the second part of the initiation
ceremony.‟
„What exactly did you do during the initiation?‟
„I was unblocking and aligning your chakras so that you can freely
receive and pass the Reiki energy. So I unblocked your crown chakra that
is where the Reiki energy enters your body and the chakras on your hands
so that you can pass the Reiki energy through the palms of your hands on
to various parts of your body. It is a temporary alignment and opening.
You have to practice what I taught you for the opening to remain and
grow. That is why it is important that you continue this for 21 days. It is a
purification process, at the end of that period the energy will flow more
easily from your head through the palms of your hand onto your body.‟
„I‟ll be here at 8 in the morning. Is that okay?‟
„Perfect dear. This is for you.‟ Anand handed me a cassette tape.

104
 AURAS AND PROPHECY

„You will need it to time your 3 minutes meditation for each point
tonight. Try and do it at 6pm just before sunset.‟
„I‟ll do my best, thanks for everything. See you tomorrow.‟
„You are most welcome.‟
I thanked Kavita for lunch, tea and biscuits and headed down the stairs.
Pankaj had reclined the seat and was busy snoozing. As soon as he heard
me approaching, he got up and opened the rear passenger door. I looked
back, and waved at Anand and Kavita who were both smiling and waving
from the balcony.
That night I practiced the twenty four points. Somewhere on point
eighteen I drifted off to sleep and woke up and finished off the other six
points. When I finished, I looked at the time, three hours had gone by. It
was only meant to last 72 minutes. It had taken me 180 minutes.
The next morning I was with Anand by eight, already sipping my
second cup of tea.
„I have a small present for you.‟ Anand had a huge smile on his face as
he sunk his hands into a large brown envelope an pulled out two crystals
about four inches long, shaped as a hexagonal obelisk, one face flat and
the other pointed. One of the crystals was a milky white and the other
was rose coloured.
„These are for you.‟ Anand took my hand and placed the crystal in his
palm.
„Thank you. But what are they for?‟
„They are to help you with your meditation. You know that a
magnifying glass focuses light energy into a single spot.‟
„Yes.‟
„And what is glass made of?‟
„Sand‟
„Yes and sand is just a type of crystal. These are special crystals that
focus Reiki energy in the same way that a magnifying glass focuses light
energy. You hold them in your hand like this.‟ Anand took the crystal
from my hand and placed one crystal in his left hand and the other in his
left, the flat face facing his body and the pointed sharp end facing the tips
of his fingers.
„You just do this.‟ Anand crossed his legs and placed his hands on the
top of his knees clenching the two crystals. „Then begin the meditation.
Why don‟t you try it?‟
I took the two crystals, crossed my legs and held them in the same way
that Anand had shown me. I began drawing the symbols in my head and
chanting the mantras. Almost immediately the cold crystals started
warming up in my hands. I stayed in this position concentrating on
visualising white light flowing through my head, and into the palms of my
hands, and out of the crystals for several minutes.
„Okay that is enough fun, we have work to do,‟ chuckled Anand.
105
 SECOND CHANCE

I opened my eyes.
„Put one of the crystals next to your cheek.‟
„Wow that is quite hot,‟ I said, astonished at how warm it felt, as if it
had been in an oven.
„Yes dear. The Reiki energy is already flowing freely through you. It is
the Reiki energy that heated up the crystal. If the energy flow was blocked
then the crystal would have remained cool.‟
„That‟s amazing.‟
„Did you do the 24 points last night?‟
„Yes‟
„And this morning‟
„Yes‟
„Very good and what did you feel?‟
„I felt really calm and relaxed. I have not felt like that in a long while. I
was so relaxed that I think I fell asleep in the middle of the meditation
last night.‟
„That is always a problem. Make sure that you do the meditation on an
empty stomach it will help you stay awake. Can you see this crystal?‟
Anand pulled another large crystal similar to the white milky crystal that
he had just given me, except that it was perfectly clear.
„I have had this crystal for five years. When I first got it, it was very
milky just like the one that I gave you. The Reiki energy has purified and
aligned the crystal structure to make it clear, the same will happen to the
one I have given you. Make sure that you look after it.‟
„I will.‟
The two of us spent the rest of the morning meditating together
occasionally taking some time to have a cup of tea and biscuits. At the
end of the morning Anand led me to the initiation room. I heard the
same mutterings and the sound of cymbals but there were no lights this
time.
„Congratulations you have achieved the first degree level.‟ Anand
handed me a green A4 sheet of paper in a plastic folder and gave me big
hug.
„Why thank you. What do I do now?‟
„Just practice exactly as I have taught you. Do the 24 points in the
morning and in the evening for 21 days continuously. Don‟t miss any day.
Then come back here after you have finished and then I will teach you
some more symbols, mantras and you will be ready for your second
degree, initiation.
The next three weeks quickly sped by, I diligently performed the 24
point meditation in the morning and in the evenings. I also bought
several books on Reiki to better know what I was getting myself into.
„Good morning,‟ said Anand, as he greeted me with a warm embracing
hug.
106
 AURAS AND PROPHECY

„Morning,‟ I replied, „how are you?‟

„I am fine dear. How are you? Did you complete the 21 day course?‟
„Yes I did and I feel much better now than I did when I first met you. I
have been reading a lot about Reiki.‟
„And what did you find out?‟ he asked.
„Well everything that you told me was the same as what was in the
books.‟
„You were checking up on me,‟ said Anand, with a broad smile on his
face.
„Um. Not really. Just want to be sure of what I am doing.‟
„It‟s good that you read the books. I like reading to. I am glad that you
are interested in learning about Reiki. Now tell me what you experienced
during these three weeks.‟
„It has been a busy time at work, but I found that when I started the
meditation it didn‟t take long for me to calm down. I felt so at peace.‟
Very good. Did you see anything, any colours?‟
„Not at first. But then I started to see different colours of light coming
from my hands and body. At first it was red and orangey, but then it
changed to a purple colour. Now when I start doing the meditation all I
see is purple. It‟s like a large firework rocket going off in the night sky lit
up by large blooms of purple. It‟s wonderful to watch as one pattern
fades another one bursts into life.‟
„That is very good. You have made excellent progress,‟ beamed Anand.
„Why did you ask me about the colours? Is there some significance to
the colours?‟
„As your chakras line up and become clearer then you start to see and
experience different colours. The colours reflect your emotions, the
clearer you see the colours the more in touch you are with your emotions.
It shows that the cleansing purification process is working.‟
„That‟s great to know. But what about the different colours?‟
„That is a bit harder to interpret. We are all different and our feelings
manifest in different ways. But usually red and orange indicate anger
whilst purple indicates spiritual peace. I feel that the anger and frustration
inside of you is being slowly washed away.‟
„I don‟t know about that. But I am definitely feeling a lot calmer. So
what are we going to do today?‟
„I am going to teach you some more symbols and mantras. Then we will
do the second degree initiation.‟
„Is it the same as the first one you did on me?‟
„No. A little different. I will be using more power to open up your
chakras more. This time I will hit the palms of your hand very hard to
open up the chakra points. You will find it a lot easier to meditate and the
colours will become brighter and more varied after the second degree
initiation.‟
107
 SECOND CHANCE

The following months I steadily and regularly practiced the Reiki

meditation. Work was getting more frantic and I looked forward to the
times when I could meditate. Many times I was unable to do the full 24
points and instead did the eight major points.
The monsoon rains started, I had never imagined that I would be so
glad to see rain having lived for so long in England. The rains gave a
welcome cooling; quenching the hot dusty ground. I enjoyed the earthy
moist smell straight after the rains. I could see, feel, and now I could
smell the countryside around me. Reiki had sharpened my senses making
me more appreciative of the sights, sounds, smells and textures around
me. Work was taking me to all parts of India. One weekend I found
myself in Bangalore in the south of India, known as the silicon valley of
India.
The countryside was quite different from Ahmedabad, lush and
tropical. There were more cars and the city was more modern and
affluent. I checked into the Oberoi Hotel, one of the better hotels in
Bangalore. I was greeted by the smell of beeswax floating up from the
vast expanse of highly polished old dark wooden floors covered by a
large dome. An exquisite crystal chandelier hung from the centre of the
dome shining light over a large intricately woven rug upon which there
were a number of burgundy leather sofas. Energised young and old men
in suits were seated on the sofas. The older ones were discussing business
the younger ones were being interviewed for a job or anxiously waiting to
be interviewed. The hotel was surrounded by a luscious tropical garden
through which they had thoughtfully constructed a winding path that
took you past bright yellow, orange, purple and red flowers erupting from
bushes and palm trees. The path went right around the gardens and
finished by going through a Japanese ornamental pond adorned with
large tranquil floating lilies.
„How long will you be staying Sir?‟ asked a young beautiful receptionist,
who was dressed in a two piece blue sari and top which had a golden
border. Her brass coloured name plate read Khamini.
„Only one night I‟m afraid; back to Ahmedabad tomorrow. It‟s really
nice here.‟
„Thank you Sir. We are upgrading you to our executive suite on the
fourth floor overlooking the gardens. Is that okay?‟
„Sounds fantastic. Thank you, Khamini.‟
„You‟re most welcome. The bell boy will take your bags directly up to
your room.‟
The rest of the day was spent with meetings. That night it started to
rain. When I woke up it was still raining. I got ready and went to check
out.
„Good morning Khamini. I‟d like to check out.‟
„Good morning Sir. Are you planning to go back to Ahmedabad?‟
108
 AURAS AND PROPHECY

„Yes I am. You have a good memory.‟

„Thank you. We have just heard that the airport is flooded and there are
no flights coming or leaving at the moment. Would you still like to check
out?‟
I thought for a while and checked my diary; I had a meeting in Delhi on
Monday afternoon.
„Is there a flight to Delhi tomorrow from here?‟
„Yes Sir. There is a direct flight and the airport should be operational
tomorrow. Would you like me to change your tickets and have you check
out tomorrow?‟
„Yes if you could please.‟
I looked out into the gardens it was still raining.
„Do you have a bookshop?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir, if you go through the corridor on your right and keep going it
is just a little way on your left.‟
„Thanks,‟ I left the reception area and headed for the bookshop.
It was a small shop with a limited selection. Some books on site seeing
around India and Bangalore, a small section with the latest best selling
fiction. By far the largest section was on meditation and yoga. There were
many books on Reiki, on the karma sutra, yoga, Buddhism, as well as
several beginners‟ guides on Hinduism. A small green back book peeped
out at me: „The Celestine Prophecy‟. I remembered how many years ago,
Manish, a work colleague had been raving on about how „The Celestine
Prophecy‟ had changed his life. I had been meaning to read it, but never
got around to it. I picked it up, the cover had international best seller
1996 plastered all over it in bold red letters, over 12million copies in
print.
„Is this book any good?‟ I asked, „I guess it must be with so many copies
in print. ‟
„Yes Sir, it is very popular. I am sure you will enjoy it. It is one of our
best sellers.‟
I turned the book over and read out a comment from the back „Brace
yourself for a breath taking spiritual journey as Indiana Jones meets Scott
Peck in the jungles of Peru.‟ I hope it‟s better than Scott Peck, a lot better
than „The Road Less Travelled‟, remembering the pain and hurt of
splitting up with Rita and all those sessions with Rupert. I blamed Scott
Peck for taking me along that desolate Road, no wonder it was „The Road
Less Travelled‟!
„It is a very good book. It is very unusual. The other book which I
would recommend to you is „Autobiography of a Yogi‟.‟ The shop owner
shuffled out from behind the counter, went over to the meditation
section, picked up a copy of the book and handed it to me. I looked at
the price and gave both of the books to the shop owner.
„How much is that?‟
109
 SECOND CHANCE

„350 rupees please.‟

I handed him over a 500 rupee note and went back to my room.
I put away the „Autobiography of a Yogi‟ in my suitcase and started to
read „Celestine Prophecy‟. Several hours later I had finished the book and
looked out of the patio doors. The rain had stopped. I opened the doors
went onto the balcony and wiped the seat in the balcony dry. I turned to
a page that I had marked earlier, and read it over a few times. I put the
book down and began to stare at the branches and leaves of a tree just in
front of his balcony. I kept looking straight at the tree focussing on
something just past the trees. It was working, a smile started to break out
on my face which was soon swept by a look of total amazement.
I got up and rushed back into the room and phoned Anand.
„Hello Anand, I have something amazing to tell you.‟
„Arjuna is that you dear?‟ replied Anand, „how are you?‟
„I feel fantastic. I have to tell you something, the most amazing thing
has just happened to me. I can‟t believe it.‟
„Are you okay? Where are you?‟
„I have never felt better. I am in Bangalore on business. I am reading
this book „Celestine Prophecy‟, have you read it? It‟s utterly amazing.‟
„I have heard of it but have not read it. Are you alright dear?‟
„Yes I am. I just wanted to tell you what just happened.‟
„Tell me dear, what happened,‟ replied Anand.
„This book is about this reporter who comes across these spiritual
truths about the universe. The first truth is that there is no such thing as
coincidences. I can‟t believe it. Can it be a coincidence that I am stuck in
Bangalore and am reading this book six years after it was first
recommended to me.‟
„There is no such thing as coincidences dear. You were destined to
come to India, meet me in Ahmedabad, go to Bangalore and read this
book. What else does the book say?‟
„The book then goes on about how there is a growing spiritual
awakening and that people are beginning to realise that the only way to
get peace is to connect with this energy. Is this Reiki energy that he is
talking about? Is that what I am being connected to?‟
„You are connected to Reiki energy. Perhaps it is the same energy that is
talked about in the book. I don‟t know whether it is just a story or a real
experience.‟
„I carried on reading the book, the hero in this book gets more and
more in tune with this energy that is flowing through him and all the trees
and plants around him. Anyway the hero is helped by someone else who
teaches him how to see auras. He does it and starts to see the auras of
plants and vegetation around him. I finished the book and then wondered
whether it was all just a story or whether there was some truth in it. So I
went out and did exactly what was described in the book. I started staring
110
 AURAS AND PROPHECY

at this tree, focussing just a little past it. At first nothing happened then I
saw it. A yellowy green electric field around the tree and plants, the more
I concentrated the more I could see and then when I smiled the aura
responded and grew in intensity. I just couldn‟t believe it. I was talking to
the tree.‟
„Yes my dear. Trees and all living things have auras. You are developing
spiritually very quickly. Trees usually have yellow and green auras
sometimes they are purple. Keep on practicing soon you will see your
own aura.‟
„So it‟s true. You can see auras and what I saw was the aura of the tree.‟
„Yes it is true dear. You are becoming more and more tuned with the
Reiki energy. Keep on meditating. When are you coming back to
Ahmedabad?‟
„I‟ll be back in a few days. I have to go to Delhi first.‟
„Come and see me when you get back. I am about to meditate. I will
send you some Reiki energy to help you develop your abilities more.‟
„Okay, thanks. I‟ll come and see you as soon as I get back.‟ I put the
phone down.

111
SECOND CHANCE

112
 8 ASTRAL TRAVEL

Bangalore airport was re-opened. Khamini had booked an early

morning flight for me straight to Delhi. It was a restless night, I
wondered whether I had really seen the auras of the trees, or was it just
some fanciful autosuggestion process? Either it was real in which case my
understanding of the world and what I could do in it was about to
radically change or I had simply imagined it. Both alternatives implied
that I was going a little crazy.
I didn‟t sleep much, by the time I got the wake-up call I was more tired
than when I had entered the bed. It was almost a two hour flight from
Bangalore to Delhi. I planned to catch up on my sleep then. On the way
to the airport I remembered my conversation with Krishna at Pizza
Express about Connaught Circle in Delhi and this place called Foresight.
Perhaps if there was time I should try and find this place.
I managed to get a window seat in the emergency exit row, stretched
out my legs and was soon fast asleep.
I was soon dreaming. I was just floating along, bobbing up and down in
an ocean of darkness then all of a sudden I was sitting next to Rita in her
Golf convertible. Rita was driving somewhere and she looked surprised
to see me. She was wearing tracksuit bottoms and a blue grey fleece top
with a zip up the middle. She looked and smiled at me in a curious sort of
way. I indicated to her that we should go to the park; although I am not
sure how I did this as I did not speak to her but just looked into her eyes.
I somehow, managed to get the thoughts over to her. She smiled back at
me and took a turn off the road. We were soon in a hilly grassy park. Rita
and I got out of the car and held hands. I looked into her eyes and
smiled. She smiled back at me quizzically. We walked around a bit, we
never said a word to one another, yet we were communicating. A little

113
 SECOND CHANCE

while later I let go of her hand, she smiled and waved good bye. Then the
whole scene just dissolved away.
I got up and heard the announcement that we were about to land in
Delhi. I felt totally refreshed. It was 9:35 when I left the airport, about 4
o‟clock in the morning in London where Rita was fast asleep. It was too
early to call her then. I‟d call her when she was getting up. Big Group had
an office in Gurgaon, a kind of Milton Keynes of India, a little outside of
Delhi, where all the multi-nationals and call centres were beginning to
relocate. There was less pollution, larger and cheaper houses and many
more golf courses.
I met with Manoj, a very bright and friendly young man. He was born
in the southern part of India in Tamil Nadu. He had studied in Delhi, and
lived and worked in Mumbai and Calcutta. He had started life as a
journalist and been the host of a topical news programme on one of the
many cable channels before deciding to switch careers and go into the
corporate world. Manoj had found the transition from television to the
corporate world easy. Big Group needed people of Manoj‟s calibre. They
had an ideal position for Manoj in Government liaison. The job involved
trying to find out what was going on, who were the decision makers, how
best to meet with them and what to say in the meetings, to ensure that we
got their approval to do the kinds of deals that Big Group was interested
in. I had met Manoj twice before, when he had come to Ahmedabad. We
had gotten on very well. He was there to greet me at the airport.
„Good morning Manoj. How are you?‟ I asked.
„I‟m fine and how was your flight? Let me get that,‟ Manoj offered to
carry my laptop to the waiting car.
„That‟s okay I‟ll manage. Thanks for coming to pick me up, I‟m not sure
that I would have remembered where the office was located.‟
„You‟re most welcome,‟ Manoj replied with a big smile on his face.
Manoj had a square face, with large square spectacles, and a thick
moustache, a bit like Brains from Thunderbirds. The ride to the office
took over an hour. The traffic was worse than I had expected. We talked
about what Manoj was up to and how his wife, Purnima, was getting
along with the various charities that she was involved in. They seemed to
be doing well in life.
„I‟ve fixed up a meeting with the Chief Secretary to the Minister of
Telecommunications and IT this afternoon at 3 o‟clock,‟ said Manoj.
„Where‟s the office?‟
„It‟s at Sanchar Bhavan, Ashoka Road. We will need to leave the office
at 1:30 to be sure of getting there on time.‟
„Is that anywhere near Connaught Circle?‟
„Yes, it‟s quite close about ten minutes.‟
„There‟s a place I need to go to there, you can come along if you like. I
guess you‟ll have to because I‟ll have the car with me.‟
114
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

The morning flew by as we discussed the various projects and

government approvals that we would need to have for our projects to go
ahead.
„We better get going in 15 minutes,‟ said Manoj.
„Is that the time.‟ I looked at my watch it was 1:l5.
„Okay I‟ll start packing up. I need to call Rita.‟ I motioned to Manoj that
I would need a little privacy.
It took a while before Rita picked up the phone.
„Morning, darling! Were you still asleep?‟ I asked.
„No I was brushing my teeth when I heard the phone ringing. I dreamt
about you last night,‟ Rita replied.
„I know that this is going to sound strange. But when you saw me in
your dream, were you driving in your Golf and wearing a track suit
bottom and your favourite grey/blue top.‟
„Yes I was in the Golf, and I was wearing exactly those clothes. How
did you know?‟
„Then when we were in the car, I smiled at you and you smiled back.
We didn‟t say anything to each other. Then I told you to drive to the
park, again I didn‟t ask you but you knew that I had asked you to go to
the park.‟
„You are starting to scare me. How do you know? That‟s exactly what I
dreamt.‟
„We went to the park, got out of the car, held hands, walked around for
a bit, smiled and then I had to leave, you waved at me and then I
disappeared. We didn‟t say a word to each other but we understood each
other perfectly.‟
„Yes that is exactly what happened. Tell me how do you know all this?‟
„I was on a flight this morning from Bangalore to Delhi, I was sleepy,
and went to sleep thinking of you. Then I had the very same dream. I felt
that I entered your dream.‟
„You are really scaring me‟, replied Rita, „there was something strange
about you in the dream, I didn‟t really want you in the dream. I was going
somewhere, and then you suddenly popped up and started controlling the
dream. What is going on? How do you know what happened?‟ she asked
again.
„I don‟t know what is going on. Perhaps it‟s the Reiki meditation. I‟ll ask
Anand when I meet him. I don‟t know how it happened. It just did. I‟ll
call you when I get to Ahmedabad later tonight. I have to go now, I‟m
getting late for a meeting. Love you lots.‟
„Don‟t forget to call me. Love you.‟ Rita hung up the phone.
This was all getting very strange, first the auras then this dream. I could
have imagined the auras and the dream. But if I had imagined the dream
then how could I explain Rita having the same dream. Perhaps it was the
work of my subconscious. I knew that Rita likes driving around, she often
115
 SECOND CHANCE

wears that tracksuit and top and she likes to spend time with me. I could
have imagined it all. But Rita dreamt the exact same dream at the exact
same time. The odds of that happening, surely had to be astronomical?
We got to the Ministry on time. Manoj had made all the necessary
arrangements and we had a good meeting with the Chief Secretary.
„Well done Manoj. It went very smoothly. Did you make a note of the
documents that we need to file to get our approvals?‟ I asked.
„Yes. I have it all written down. I‟ll email you a copy and get working on
it straightaway,‟ replied Manoj.
„Good work. Do you want to come with me to Connaught Circle or
would you like me to drop you off somewhere?‟
„I‟ll come with you. As it is, Connaught Circle is on the way back to the
Airport and the office, so we have to go that way any way. Is there a place
specifically that you would like to go?‟ asked Manoj.
„Here it is. The place that I want to go to is called Foresight. It‟s on
Connaught Circle, but I am not sure where on Connaught Circle, I don‟t
have a number. I vaguely remember something about it being close to a
cinema.‟
„Regal Cinema?‟
„Yes, I think so.‟
Manoj gave the driver the appropriate instructions and we were heading
towards Regal Cinema.
„What is this place, Foresight, if you don‟t mind me asking,‟ Manoj
politely enquired.
„Well, it‟s a place that was recommended to me by a colleague of mine
in London. They do horoscopes. It sounds a bit mad and I really don‟t
believe in them, but I thought that I would go there, out of curiosity. It‟s
not that important.‟
„There is nothing crazy about horoscopes. My father is a Brahmin and
he has the ability to construct and read horoscopes. They are very
accurate. There is someone I know who has a real gift in telling the
future, his name is Sunil. He spends the afternoon at the Hyatt or Oberoi
hotel giving consultations. I could see if he is free to see you, you will
have time before your evening flight to Ahmedabad. But only if you are
curious.‟ Manoj beamed back at me.
„Well I‟m not sure whether I have the time.‟
Manoj didn‟t reply.
„What does he charge?‟
„He does not charge anything. He was given this gift by some guru. It is
his responsibility to use this gift for the betterment of mankind. It will be
a blessing for him if you meet with him and it turns out that he can help
you,‟ replied Manoj.
„Will you be there with me?‟

116
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

„I‟ll come and introduce you to him, assuming that he is available, and
then I will leave. Whatever you discuss with him is between you and him.
I‟ll make my way to Purnima‟s office, which is nearby, and we‟ll go home
together. Shall I call Sunil to ask whether he is available?‟
I looked at my watch it was only 3:30. The meeting with the Chief
Secretary had gone according to time. Perhaps it was a coincidence that I
was with Manoj and he knew this guy Sunil, and I had time to see him –
if he was available. If it was really something that was meant to happen
then Sunil would be available to see me at 5pm, which would give enough
time to find Foresight, drive to the hotel and then to the airport for me to
catch the 8pm flight back to Ahmedabad.
„Okay. Why don‟t you give Sunil a call and see if he is available to meet
me at 5pm this evening,‟ I told Manoj.
Manoj immediately called Sunil; he could see me at the Polo Bar at the
Hyatt at 5pm that day.
„It looks as if it is your destiny to meet with Sunil today,‟ said Manoj,
smiling more than ever.
„Maybe it is destiny. How do you know this Sunil?‟ I asked.
„I met Sunil when I was doing some research on a TV documentary on
some of the monasteries in Nepal. Someone suggested that I meet with
Sunil as he had spent some time in Nepal at a monastery and was now
living in Delhi.‟
„So what does Sunil do for a living if he doesn‟t charge people for
consultations?‟
„He has a number of businesses, but I am not sure what they are. I think
they are related to IT or call centres or something. He doesn‟t talk a lot
about himself. You should ask him when you meet, perhaps he‟ll tell you,‟
replied Manoj.
„Okay we‟re here. Did you say opposite Regal Cinema?‟ asked Manoj.
„Yes somewhere near there. But this is Rajiv Gandhi Chowk,‟ I said
after reading one of signs.
„Yes this is Rajiv Gandhi Chowk, they keep on changing the names of
the places to make them more Indian. Connaught Circle is the name that
the British gave to this place. A couple of years ago some Minister
decided that it was not right to be reminded of British colonial
oppression and that we should change all the English names into Indian
names. The problem is that everyone knows this place as Connaught
Circle. If you ask for Rajiv Gandhi Chowk no one will know what you are
talking about,‟ replied Manoj.
„How confusing. There‟s the cinema but I can‟t see anything opposite it,
except a car park.‟
„There are some small shops underground that go around the car park.
I‟ll get the driver to drop us off here and then I‟ll take you to where
Foresight might be.‟
117
 SECOND CHANCE

We got off the car by the Regal cinema. Manoj gave the driver
instructions to park in the car park and come and get us in 30 minutes.
Connaught Circle, or I should say Rajiv Gandhi Chowk, was a very large
roundabout which had many roads radiating from it, a bit like Arc De
Triomphe at the end of the Champs d‟Elysee in Paris. No doubt
Courvoisier the French architect working for the British had this in mind
when he was planning the layout of New Delhi. In the centre of the
roundabout was a car park, it looked as if earlier there might have been a
nicely laid out garden.
There was a subway opposite the cinema which we took and sure
enough there were a small semi-subterranean shopping mall with little
boutiques that circled the central car park. After about 10 minutes
walking around, we located Foresight, at no 23A. It was a small shop
about ten feet wide. Inside there were two desks, two computers and a
laser printer. It was dusty and very grubby inside.
„Is this Foresight ?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir,‟ replied the man behind one of the desks.
„I‟d like my horoscope done.‟
„We have many types of horoscopes. The basic is Rs200 and the deluxe
is Rs750. Which one would you like?‟ The man handed me a laminated
sheet which had the different horoscopes and prices.
I looked down the list and saw that there was a marriage matching
horoscope at Rs500.
„What is this one?‟ I asked pointing to the marriage matching
horoscope.
„That is very popular, Sir. It calculates how compatible a couple is with
one another. We need the couples exact date, time and place of birth. It
will then tell you your degree of compatibility.‟
„Okay I will take two deluxe horoscopes and one marriage matching
horoscope.‟ I thought that I‟d get one done for me and one for Rita.
„Very good, Sir. Please fill out these three forms and we will calculate
and print out your horoscopes.‟
The forms asked for the time of birth.
„Is the exact time important?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir, a few minutes can make all the difference. That is why often
twins have very different horoscopes and their lives can be completely
different,‟ the man replied.
I didn‟t know my exact time of birth. I phoned my Mum in the UK,
who was surprised at why I was asking for the time of birth. Getting
Rita's time of birth would be tricky, she was bound to ask lots of
questions.
„Why do you want to know my time of birth? You call me up this
morning about the dream and now you are asking for my time of birth.

118
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

What‟s going on? I don‟t like you spending your time with all this
madness. Aren‟t you supposed to be at work?‟ asked a very agitated Rita.
„Yes I am at work. I‟ve finished for the day. I am not going crazy. I‟ll
explain everything when I get back to Ahmedabad and call you tonight.
Please don‟t worry.‟
She gave me her time of birth. I filled in our times of birth on the forms
and handed them back. Half an hour later I had my and Rita‟s
horoscopes as well as the matching horoscope and we were heading to
the Hyatt Hotel to meet with Sunil.
I looked quickly at the matching horoscope. Rita and I were a near
perfect match. I remembered what the Pundit had told my Mum and how
he had managed to get £1000 out of her. Rs500 was about £7.
I started reading my horoscope.
„Is there anything wrong?‟ asked Manoj.
I wondered whether to tell him or not. If I tell him perhaps he will
somehow let Sunil know what I was reading about my past and my
future. If he were to do that then I wouldn‟t know for sure whether Sunil
really had some gift of prophecy or not.
„It‟s nothing. Something that I read in this horoscope,‟ I smiled back
trying to hide my surprise and astonishment.
Manoj smiled back.
„Horoscopes can be very accurate. They are as accurate as the accuracy
of the time and place that you give for your birth. People are vague about
the time. A minute can make all the difference.‟
„A minute can make all the difference!‟
„Yes it can. Your horoscope is based on the relative position of the
planets. The whole sky is divided into geometric sections. When a planet
or moon moves from one geometric section to another it changes its
influence on you. So it really depends on what time you are born. For
example at 10:31 on Friday 24th January 1992, Jupiter could be at the end
of one section, and at 10:33 it could have moved into another section.
Sometimes the movement from one section to another can have a
dramatic effect.‟
„I‟ve never heard that before. So how is it that the planets moving
around can affect you?‟
„That I do not know. Perhaps you could ask Sunil when you meet him.‟
I spent the rest of the short journey glancing at the rest of the report
trying to make sense of what was in the report. I hadn‟t got very far in
making sense of anything by the time we pulled up at the Hyatt.
The Hyatt was located on a very noisy chaotic road going to the airport.
On its left there was a large monstrous concrete building with dark, dirty
unwashed windows. A huge blue on white sign indicated that it was a
government building belonging to GAIL, Gas Authority of India
Limited. Everyone likes to have authority, I mused. But then if you do
119
 SECOND CHANCE

have authority do you really have to tell people? Surely they would know
anyway. The hotel was set a little back from the main road. A steep slip
road led up to the main entrance. The moment the car came to a stop, a
bellman was ready to open the door and give a warm greeting. I mumbled
thank you and walked in.
Inside the lobby it was cool and calm. It was a large open lobby, the
reception was to the left and in front of the entrance were steps leading
down to what seemed like the swimming pool.
„The Polo bar is down the stairs and to the left. Sunil will probably be
waiting for us,‟ said Manoj, pointing straight ahead.
I followed Manoj into the lobby and down the stairs. At this time of the
afternoon there were just a couple of people in the bar. There was a
young man in a blue blazer sitting in the corner quietly on his own, slowly
sipping a drink from a tall glass. He looked up and waved in our
direction.
„That‟s Sunil,‟ said Manoj, waving back.
„Hello Sunil, this is Arjuna from England. He‟s come from Big Group
to help us,‟ continued Manoj.
Sunil got up from his chair. He was thin and compact with short black
hair and a neatly trimmed moustache. His clothes were crisply ironed. He
held out his hand to greet me.
I shook his hand and said, „Manoj has said a lot of good things about
you. Thanks for making the time to meet with me at such short notice.‟
„You are most welcome,‟ replied Sunil as he sat down and motioned me
to sit in a comfortable leather armchair next to him. He had a soft polite
voice, speaking with mechanical precision. There was a certain harmony
and composure around him.
„That‟s my job done. I will leave you to alone to discuss matters.‟
„Would you be able to write up what happened with the Chief Secretary
and the next steps?‟
„Yes you‟ll have it in your email account by tomorrow morning. Okay
bye.‟
It was good to have someone so reliable on the team.
„I‟ll call you tomorrow, once I‟ve had a chance to go through your note.
Thanks for arranging the meeting. Good work. See you,‟ I said, as I
shook Manoj‟s hand wishing him a good-bye.
I sat back into the large and very comfortable leather chair.
„Would you like something to drink?‟ asked Sunil.
„Yes that would be good idea. What are you drinking?‟
„It‟s a fresh lime soda. Would you like to have one?‟
I nodded. Sunil ordered a drink and sat back in his chair and smiled at
me. It seemed that he was expecting me to say something.
„I‟m not sure how you do this or what I am supposed to do.‟

120
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

Sunil put his hand in his pocket and held out a clear crystal. It looked
similar to the one that Anand had given me in Ahmedabad.
„I would like you to hold this crystal in your hand and just relax. I will
ask you your day and time of birth. When you feel like it, just ask me
what you would like to know,‟ Sunil held out the crystal and dropped it
into the palm of my hand.
The crystal was small and quite warm. I gripped it with my hand and sat
back.
„Can you tell me where and when you were born?‟
„I was born on April 24 1968, in Mombasa, Kenya,‟ I replied.
„You have a lot on your mind. You are uncertain about what you are
doing in India. You have come looking for something, you are not sure
whether you will find it, and whether or not you are on the right path,‟
announced Sunil.
„Will I find what I am looking for? Am I on the right path?‟
Sunil pondered for a while and closed his eyes. It looked as if he was
focussing on something.
„Yes you will find what you are looking for. But it may take some time.
You are on the right path. But the path is seldom straight. Trust in your
instincts, go with your heart. Be on the lookout for signs that show you
the way,‟ replied Sunil.
„What kinds of signs?‟ I asked. This was all a bit „Charlie Cryptic‟, very
vague.
„People that you meet, things that you will see, places which you visit,‟
he replied.
This was not helping. I thought I‟d ask Sunil something a little bit more
specific.
„Why am I holding this crystal?‟
„The crystal helps me focus on your energy waves. It makes it a lot
easier for me to be in tune with you and the surroundings. It also acts like
a filter.‟
„Manoj told me that you might know how it is that the planets affect
people‟s horoscopes.‟
„Yes. As you know every planet has a gravitational field around it. It is
the interaction of the gravitational fields of one planet with another and
the sun that determines their motion around the sun and around each
other. Scientists have developed this theoretical framework and know
that it is correct because of what they can observe in terms of the motion
of the planets. However, they do not have a way of detecting gravity.
There is no gravity field measuring device. Scientists can measure the
strength of electricity fields, and even radioactive activity but they cannot
measure a gravity field. Now just as a piece of wire which has a current
flowing through it produces an electric field around it, it also produces a
magnetic field. The relationship between the two is governed by
121
 SECOND CHANCE

Maxwell‟s equations. This is the way that nature works, in harmony and
balance, everything produces two kinds of fields, not one but two.
Electric current flowing in a wire produces an electric field as well as a
magnetic field.
In the same way planets generate two fields, each field affects us in
different ways. One is the gravitational field effect and the other is an
emotional field effect. Our emotions are the results of energy impulses
generated and transmitted throughout our bodies. The various planets
interact and produce a complex series of emotional waves that radiate
throughout the universe. We are all bathed in these waves. Now these
waves interact with your emotional energy waves inside your body and
mind. Sometimes the external waves build you up and sometimes they
pull you down. You will have seen the same effect watching the waves on
the ocean and how they interact with various beaches and rocks.
When you are born, the planets are in a certain position generating a
certain energy wave pattern. The intensity and nature of the energy
pattern varies according to where you are on the planet. When you come
out of the womb the energy pattern that is around you at that moment
becomes stamped onto you, this is a function of time of birth and place
of birth. So no two people will have exactly the same energy pattern, it is
as unique as a fingerprint. Now this fixed energy pattern interacts with
the ever changing energy pattern of the planets, the moon and the sun;
this is how and why your moods are affected depending on the time of
month and also why we each react differently to what is happening
around us.‟
I was not expecting such a long and detailed answer.
Sunil had more to say, „each planet has a certain magnitude and
frequency of energy. The energy and intensity of Mars is quite different
from that of the Moon or Jupiter. Some frequencies affect one‟s sex
drive; other frequencies affect fear, or wisdom et cetera. Every emotion
has a different frequency and certain planets are more associated with
specific emotions. Now in the same way that scientists have been unable
to measure gravity fields we also have no way with which to measure
these emotional fields. However, in India we have been observing the
planets and observing people‟s behaviours. From these patterns we have
developed a sophisticated model, from which we can predict the kinds of
moods that people have had in the past and will have in the future.‟
„So do you have some sort of equation?‟ I asked.
„No there is not really a proper equation. We have some
approximations. Most of the predictions are based on certain patterns
that we have observed over a number of years. So whilst each person has
a unique emotional energy field there are some broad characteristics
which are common across a lot people. It is by looking at these patterns
that we can make fairly accurate predictions. We know how the planets
122
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

move with a great deal of precision and we know what your emotional
energy field looked like when you were born.‟
„Is that why you asked me my date and place of birth?‟
„Yes. I was taught by a priest in Nepal, who has now passed away, on
how to quickly and roughly determine someone‟s emotional energy map.
I don‟t need to make complex charts. The crystal helps me check whether
I am right about your energy map.‟
„So where did this priest learn how to do all this?‟ I asked.
„He was originally from Tibet. But this skill was initially developed over
four thousand years ago by the Chaldeans who lived in the
Mesopotamian region. It is very accurate and very specific.‟
„But you weren‟t very specific in your predictions and what you told
me.‟
„That is because your question was very vague. You are unsure of the
question so how can I give you a specific answer to a vague question.‟
Sunil smiled for the first time.
Sunil definitely had a point. But I wasn‟t going to let him get away so
easily.
„So you can tell about my past, present as well as my future?‟ I asked.
„Yes I can.‟
„Okay can you tell me whether or not I am married and when I was
married?‟
„Yes you are married. You got married between the autumn of 1997 and
spring of 1998. Three years later you had a very difficult time in marriage,
and your relationship with your wife was almost totally destroyed. The
worst has passed and your relationship is now getting better and better
and will continue to improve.‟
I did not reply.
Sunil looked at me intently.
„Is what I told you correct?‟
„Yes it is.‟
It was extremely accurate. Perhaps it was a lucky guess.
„Have I ever had an accident, and will I have an accident in the future,‟ I
asked
Sunil closed his eyes and took a while to respond.
„In the summer of 1990 you had a very bad road accident in which you
were nearly killed. You were badly injured but everything healed up and
you just have a few scars left. There are no more accidents as such.
However, in your late 50s somewhere in your 58th or 59th year someone
will shoot you, trying to kill you. The bullet will miss your heart and you
will survive.‟
I sank further into the leather chair, staring at Sunil.
„Sometimes it is better not to know the future,‟ said Sunil.

123
 SECOND CHANCE

I slowly sipped my fresh lime soda. Why would anyone want to shoot
me?
„Do I know who it is that wants to kill me?‟ I asked Sunil.
„I cannot tell. All I know is that this will happen and you will survive. I
do not know the assassin or his motives. I can only tell about your life, as
you are the one holding the crystal. The future is meant to be hidden
from us. Coming from the West you must be familiar with the story of
Cassandra.‟
„You mean the Greek princess who had the ability to tell the future but
nobody would believe her. Yes I know the story, she had a very miserable
existence,‟ I replied.
„People think that it will be helpful to know the future. They expect it to
be full of happiness. Unfortunately life is a mixture of good and bad.
When I tell them about the bad things they get upset and start to worry.
It is very difficult to change the future.‟
I thought about what Sunil said.
„You said it was difficult to change the future. Does that mean that you
can change the future?‟ I asked.
„You can modify how you are feeling and the degree to which things
happen but you cannot change the event from happening. So someone
will come and shoot you and you will survive. The extent to which you
suffer both physically and emotionally as a consequence of being shot can
be changed. You can end up being happier or sadder as a result of doing
certain things,‟ replied Sunil.
„What kinds of things?‟ I asked.
„In some cases there are certain mantras or pujas that you can do. There
are also ways in which you can modify your emotional energy harmonics
so that you are affected by some planets more and other planets less. But
it is not an exact science.‟
I remembered the mantra and the strange smearing of the ash that Dr
Gopal from Toronto had asked me to do. Sunil was telling me the same
but giving me a little bit more of an explanation. I glanced at my watch.
„Look I have to go. Let me get the drinks.‟
„No please. You are my guest, I will get the bill.‟
„I want to know more about this. I am not sure when I will be next in
Delhi is there something that I can read?‟
„Yes there are a number of books on astrology by a man called Raman,
he passed away in the 1950s, they are considered to be the definitive
works studied by anyone wishing to develop this art. I‟ll email you the
titles. Where do you live?‟
„I am in Ahmedabad.‟
„Ahmedabad, Ahmedabad,‟ muttered Sunil.
„Yes Ahmedabad. I know someone there. I need to dig out his contact
details. You can speak to him and he will give you more help. It‟s a shame
124
 ASTRAL TRAVEL

we did not have more time to spend with each other. I‟ll email his details
to you together with the names of the books.‟
„Thanks I really appreciate it. Are you sure I can‟t get the drinks I feel
bad that I have taken your time.‟
„No please. You are my guest.‟
„Okay thanks.‟ I shook Sunil‟s hands and headed out of the hotel on to
the airport for my flight.
As soon as I got into the car I looked at the horoscope. The first five
pages were on my personality which was fairly accurate. I had asked for a
forty year prediction from my 20th to 60th birthday. It predicted that I
would have an accident between the ages of 20-21. That coincided with
the near fatal road accident which I had at that time, that Sunil had also
known about. Sunil was a lot more accurate and vivid.
I read on, it said that I would get married between the ages of 26-27 and
that I would have marriage difficulties about 3 years after. That was also
true and the same as Sunil had told me. I wondered whether it would
mention anything about being shot between the ages of 58 and 59. I
turned to the back of the horoscope. It was not the same but it was
similar. In it was written that in the last two months of my 58th year and
the first four months of my 59th year I would suffer some problem with
my heart. Perhaps the guys at Foresight had toned down the predictions
so as not to scare people. I found it difficult to concentrate. This was
getting a little bit too coincidental.
It was going to be a long conversation with Rita that night. I wanted to
meet this guy in Ahmedabad and see what he had to say.

125
126
 9 HOROSCOPES

Rita was sceptical about what had happened in Delhi.

„You are just too gullible Arjuna, it‟s a con,‟ she said.
„But there were just too many accurate predictions about my past, how
would he have known about the accident and the other things?‟ I replied
„I bet he didn‟t give the exact date. My Mummy used to take me to see
these astrologer types. They would look at me and say something vague
like 5 years ago and then they would look at my face looking for a
reaction. If I didn‟t react they would then say or it could be between 5 to
10 years and again looking for a reaction. By looking at my reactions they
would seemingly come up with the exact date for a particular incident.
They didn‟t have any special gifts they were just extremely good at
reading body language. That is exactly what Sunil was up to. You are
wasting your time with all of this nonsense,‟ Rita was getting quite heated.
„Darling, I know that these things can happen. But it wasn‟t like that
with Sunil. He just told me the year when these things happened. He
didn‟t ask for any feedback. He really did know my past,‟ I replied.
„Arjuna, these people in India are very clever. It is a trick and you have
been fooled.‟
„But Sunil didn‟t even charge me any money. On the contrary he even
paid for my drink. That completely blows your theory out,‟ I protested.
„Haven‟t you seen the movie The Sting? Any sophisticated con-man will
firstly allow you to win or give you a small amount to win your trust.
Once they have your trust they‟ll pull out a big scam and take a whole
load of money from you. That is exactly what Sunil will do to you. He
bought you a soft drink – just wait and see at some point he‟ll ask you for
thousands of rupees, and you‟ll end up paying him. I‟ve warned you. But
I know that you‟ll just go ahead and do what you want to do. Just don‟t
come and expect any sympathy from me after you‟ve been conned.‟
127
 SECOND CHANCE

It was difficult to argue with Rita. It was possible that she might be
right – but it was very convincing and I couldn‟t figure out how Sunil
could have possibly guessed. I didn‟t give him any information apart from
my date of birth. I was convinced there was something more to this than
some „elaborate parlour trick‟.
A few days later I received an email from Sunil. The name of the
astrology expert was Hiremath Acharya he lived a couple of miles away at
Shastri Nagar. Sunil had given a phone number. I called Hiremath and
arranged to meet with him at his home the next day.
Hiremath lived in a five storey apartment block built by the Ahmedabad
Municipal Corporation. The building was no more than ten years old; but
it looked as if it had been around for centuries. It had been painted only
once when it was built, and never cleaned since then. The yellow paint
had pealed of in most places and the whole block was caked and
splattered by red sandy mud. Hiremath lived in block B on the fourth
floor. The cement steps were cracked and broken, red paan (a beetle leaf
rolled up and chewed creating excess saliva in one‟s mouth which is spat
out often in the corners of staircases. No one knows who started this
practice but unfortunately it has caught on universally in India) stains
splattered the steps and sides of the walkway where countless people had
spat over the last decade. I dared not touch anything least I caught
something. The majority of people in Ahmedabad lived in
accommodation not to dissimilar to this. I was glad that I was not living
here.
I knocked on the door. The door was opened by a thin young man with
a neatly trimmed moustache; he was dressed in jeans, a shirt and his feet
were bare. I said hello and took off my shoes before coming into
Hiremath‟s home. There was no hallway. The front door opened directly
into a room about ten feet square. Inside there was very little furniture; a
small table with a TV on top and several mattresses on the floor. The
floor was polished and immaculately clean. Hiremath beckoned for me to
sit down on one of the mattresses.
„I am very happy to meet you Sir,‟ said Hiremath.
„The pleasure is all mine. Sunil in Delhi told me to meet with you,‟ I
replied.
„Yes. I spoke to Sunil a few days ago and he told me that you are his
special friend and that I am to help you in whatever way I can. Sunil and I
went to University together, many years ago,‟ replied Hiremath.
„Thank you for agreeing to meet with me at such short notice. I really
appreciate it. I have many questions about astrology.‟
„I will try and do my best to answer your questions. But first would you
like to have a cup of tea or would you prefer to have a soft drink, a Coca-
Cola or Thumbs Up (an Indian equivalent of Coke)?‟ asked Hiremath.
„I would like to have a cup of tea, please.‟
128
 HOROSCOPES

„Yes, Sir,‟ Hiremath got up and went into the kitchen, where he spoke
to someone.
„Sir, tea is on its way. Now tell me Sir, what would you like to know?‟
„I‟m not sure where to begin. I guess I would like to know what is
astrology, why is it so accurate?‟ I asked.
„This is a very good question. I was taught by my late Professor Dr BV
Raman, a world expert in these matters. Astrology is a science, the
investigation of the influence of time on human kind. Astrology is
derived from the word Aster meaning star and Logos meaning reason or
logic. In Sanskrit it is called Jyotisha meaning the science of light.
It throws light on the dark recesses of the gloomy future. It attempts to
foretell the future history of man, the fates of nations, empires,
kingdoms, wars, revolutions and other terrestrial phenomena. It tells all
these things not by vague guesses or gesticulations but on the adamantine
basis of pure mathematical calculations. By observation, by deduction and
most important of all by induction, the astrologer has actually found a
correspondence between the movements of planets and events in the life
of each individual and this assertion can be tested in a comparatively brief
investigation by any intelligent person.
Astrology has its roots in the Hindu philosophical system. The
astrology that has been developed, primarily deals with the short span of
life, whose problems seem beyond our ability to solve. We should note
that this life is but a small section of our entire destiny. The chief value of
Astrology is in its use to determine the relationship which this life bears
to the whole. The modern theory of evolution deals only with the past
and fails to formulate any law for the future. It is essentially materialistic
and has got absolutely nothing to say of the spirit which governs matter
and reveals how its destiny will unfold. Man‟s existence on this planet, in
a particular life time, is a mere repetition and echo of his other previous
existences. His present existence is but a link in the chain of external
existences connecting the past with the future. In each birth he carries the
inceptive purpose of his creation one step forward to its goal and
consummation. Until he attains total bliss by merging with the supreme
spirit which is the cosmic consciousness of the universe. At that ultimate
point, the past, present and future are blended together. Time and space
are annihilated.
The universe is governed by cause and effect. The sun‟s rays provide
energy to this planet to give life. There is a scientific correlation between
sun spots and abnormal weather conditions. These causes and effects
have been measured by Western scientists and have been taken to be
scientific fact. In the same way for thousands of years Hindu astrologers
have been observing the stars and the planets, and they have correlated
those observations with events in people‟s life and the history of the
nation. Through painstaking observation and mathematical calculations
129
 SECOND CHANCE

they have found empirical relationships between the planetary positions

and the likely behaviour of people.
The science of Hindu Astrology is based on the principle of individual
spiritual evolution over time. The aim of every human is to ultimately
evolve into oneness with the supreme cosmic spirit. Some people call this
god. Every cause must produce an action. The Hindu astrologer believes
that the accumulated results of past incarnations are brought into the
present. In the course of the evolution of the human ego it seeks higher
or lower forms of terrestrial existence, according to accumulated good or
bad deeds, Karma, of all previous births.‟
I was surprised at Hiremath‟s eloquent response to my question. I
remembered what Dr Gopal in Canada had told me, over a year ago,
about how I had drowned in my previous life.
„You mean to say that how I died in my previous life would have a
significant impact on this life, and that you can determine what that is
from astrology?‟
„Yes that is correct.‟
„Can you really tell how I died in my previous life?‟ I asked.
„Yes one can; especially if you died in a very violent or unusual set of
circumstances.‟
It all seemed far too fabulous to believe that there was a science to all of
this prediction. I struggled to see how there could be any kind of
relationship between Mars, Jupiter, the Moon and, my life.
„How can the planets effect me, they are so far away?‟ I asked.
„Until the last century we did not know how they affected us. We simply
knew that they did. That was until Einstein came up with his General
Theory of Relativity. In that theory he postulated that in addition to
electromagnetic waves, of which light is one form, there are also gravity
waves. These gravity waves are emitted and are affected by large bodies
such as the sun, the moon and the various planets. The impact that they
have on us is related to how far they are from us and their mass; the
larger the mass, or shorter the distance, the greater the effect. So the Sun,
Jupiter and Saturn are very influential because they are relatively massive
and the moon is also influential because it is close to us.‟
„Gravity waves?‟ I asked.
„Yes Einstein‟s theory predicts that there are such things and that they
interact with electromagnetic waves in some way. The only problem is
that Western scientists have not yet developed a gravity wave detector,
although they have used Einstein‟s theory to predict certain cosmological
events. In the same way Hindu Astrologers have developed a theory that
gives accurate predictions about human history based on the position and
movement of the planets. We face the same problem as Western
scientists. We know that our theory is correct because the predicted
results are 100% accurate, but we cannot precisely measure or explain the
130
 HOROSCOPES

mechanism. Belief in Einstein‟s theory of General Relativity requires as

much faith as believing in Hindu Astrology.‟
„I never saw it like that. I guess that you are right. If you are getting the
results then there must be something to the theory. It is the same as the
Western scientific method, you develop a theory and test whether it can
accurately predict the relationship between cause and effect. If it can,
then the theory is accepted. But, if this is true, then why doesn‟t everyone
believe in astrology?‟
„The reason for this Arjuna is that some of the people who claim to be
astrologers are not properly trained. They are not aware of all of the
calculations and relations. They have not spent sufficient time
understanding or learning all of the principles. They are far too eager to
make money quickly and so start practicing before they are fully trained.
Predictions made by these novice untrained astrologers are not accurate.
They bring the whole science into disrepute.
It is not only in astrology that we have this problem. As you know
Accountants and Doctors, who are not properly trained or unscrupulous
in their practices, can easily bring the whole profession and practice into
disrepute. But the public still has faith in medical science and accounting
practices. It is the same in astrology. A qualified Astrologer will always
give you accurate results, the untrained Astrologer will only partially get it
right.‟
„How do I know if someone is suitably qualified, is there some
professional body of something of certified Astrologers?‟ I asked.
„Unfortunately there is no such body. The only way that you can know
whether the person is properly trained is by knowing their results, usually
by recommendation. The good professionals are recommended and
develop an excellent reputation. The untrained and fake astrologers do
not last for very long,‟ replied Hiremath.
By this time the tea had arrived, served by a young boy, together with
some biscuits.
„Let us have some tea,‟ said Hiremath.
I sipped the tea, thinking about what Hiremath had said. What he was
saying seemed to be logical but would require a lot of faith to believe in. I
wondered whether it really was that accurate and whether it really
worked. It seemed to have worked for me in Delhi.
But there was a flaw in what Hiremath was saying.
„Is it true that all of us have different destinies?‟ I asked.
„Yes it is true, each and every one of us is unique,‟ replied Hiremath.
„Is it also true that right now Jupiter and the rest of the planets are
exactly the same distance away from you as they are from me and the boy
that brought the tea?‟
„Yes that is also true.‟

131
 SECOND CHANCE

„And you said that the planets affect us based on their mass and their
distance from us?‟
„Yes that is true.‟
„Then how can my destiny be any different from your destiny at this
time, how can I be effected differently from you, given that you and I are
in the same space at the same time, right now in this apartment?‟ I asked,
beaming a big smile.
„It is different, because when you were born the gravitational wave
footprint that existed at that time and at that place was imprinted on your
body. That gravitational wave footprint is absolutely unique to you, as
you were the only one born at that time in that place.‟
„But what about twins, they are born at the same time; but, they do not
necessarily have the same life.‟
„That is true. But even twins are not born at exactly the same time. Each
child has to come out of the womb one at a time. Two babies cannot
come out of the womb simultaneously. It is true that some twins have
very different lives, you can have a male and a female non-identical twin.
In those cases you will often find that there was more than ten minute
difference in their birth times. In those ten minutes you can sometimes
get some quite dramatic differences in the gravitational footprint. Each
planet generates its own gravitational wave harmonic depending on their
position relative to the other planets they can either be reinforced or
diminished by other planets.
Normally the gravitational wave harmonic of Jupiter is enhanced and
reinforced by the wave harmonic of the Sun, Moon and Mars; similarly it
is reduced and diminished by the wave harmonic of Mercury and Venus.
In classical astrological terms Jupiter is regarded as a friend of the Sun,
Moon and Mars and an enemy of Mercury and Venus.
At the time of your birth, we have to see where in the sky the various
planets are. The sky is divided into twelve segments each of 30°, each
segment represents a sign of the zodiac. The position of the Earth
relative to the Sun at the time of birth determines your zodiac sign. In
your case your Hindu zodiacal sign is Dhanus which also coincides with
your western zodiacal sign of Sagittarius.
The next step is to see in which constellation, or house, the other
planets are. Each house represents some aspect of your life. Let me draw
it for you.‟
Hiremath took a piece of paper and drew out a square and then various
triangles and diamonds. He then labelled each of the segments.

132
 HOROSCOPES

„Why have you written in the star signs ?‟ I asked.

„To show you how the star signs are numbered. In Hindu astrology
Aries is regarded as the first sign in the constellation.‟
The first house, or Bhava, represents the beginning of life, childhood,
health, environment, personality, the physical body, and the general
strength of the horoscope. The second house represents family, face,
speech, right eye, food, wealth, literary gifts, manner as well as timing of
death and attitude towards life. The third house represents brothers,
sisters, short journeys, neighbours, immediate relations, writings, courage,
right ear and chest.
The fourth house represents state of mind, mother, home life, relatives,
house, property, transport, education, neck and shoulders. The fifth
house represents intelligence, father, spirit, discriminating power or the
ability to discern what is going on, children, fame and position in society.
The sixth house represents enemies, injury to the body, disappointments,
debts, illness, paternal relations and sinful deeds (if you had planets that
were hostile towards your gravitational wave footprint sitting in this
house then you are likely to have multiple ailments and most likely be
confined to bed).
The seventh house represents spouse, marriage timing, marital
relationships, desire, sexual diseases, political ability, travels and
shrewdness in business. The eighth house indicates place and
surroundings of death, longevity and impediments. The ninth house
represents godliness, righteousness, grand children, imagination, intuition,
science, spiritual gifts, fame, leadership, charity, long journeys and foreign
travel. If the planet Mercury is in this house and is friendly then the
person will be spiritually gifted.
The tenth house represents occupation, respect, religious knowledge
and position in society. The eleventh house represents friends, personal

133
 SECOND CHANCE

belongings, and freedom from misery and pain. The twelfth house
indicates misery, loss, waste, extravagance and death. If there is an
unfriendly planet in this house then money will be spent on sex and other
immoral purposes.
That is the general theory, now let me show you how this works in
practice. In Hindu astrology we are concerned with the position of seven
heavenly bodies; these are the sun, the Moon, Jupiter, Venus, Mars,
Mercury and Saturn.‟
„But what about all the other planets and stars, according to your theory
they also have an impact?‟
„Yes, sir, they do. The impact of the other planets on their own is quite
weak as they are either very far away or do not have much mass. So we
represent the impact of all the other heavenly bodies by two other
imaginary points, called Rahu and Ketu, which collectively represent the
influence of other bodies. I will show you how this works. This is the
chart of someone born on 20th April 1889 at 6:30 in the evening. I will
not tell you where in the world they were born, otherwise you might be
able to guess who it is by the birth place and date. But, we will examine
the horoscope and see the characteristics of that person, and then let us
see whether you can guess who it is.‟
„Okay. I‟d like to see how it all works,‟ I replied.
Hiremath took a blank piece of paper and drew the same chart but
numbered it a little differently and wrote down the names of the planets
in the various segments. This is what he produced.

„In the first chart you drew, you put the number 1 at the top. In this
chart you have put the number 1 at the bottom. Why is that ?‟ I asked.
„Sir, you are very observant. Do you remember the first chart I drew? In
that one I had numbered all of the star signs.‟
„Yes.‟

134
 HOROSCOPES

„You can see, sir, from that chart that the number 7 corresponds to
Libra. In Hindu Astrology this person was born in the sign of Libra, the
Thula rasi and Lagna. The Lagna, in this case Libra, always occupies the
first house. I then continue to go around anti-clockwise numbering the
other houses. So can you tell me which zodiac sign occupies the third
house?‟
I didn‟t think that Hiremath was going to test me. I looked at the earlier
sheet that he had drawn up. Then rather hesitantly I pointed to the
number 9 on the second chart and said „Is this the third house?‟
„Yes, sir, it is the third house. Now which zodiac sign is occupying the
third house.‟
„It is the number 9, which is, now let me see, yes. It is Sagittarius. So
Sagittarius is in the third house.‟
„Sir that is very good. Yes you are correct. Very good sir. Now the next
thing one has to do is to look and see in which zodiac sign the Moon,
Sun, Saturn, Jupiter, Mars, Mercury and Venus at the time of this person‟s
birth. If you were to do the calculations then you would find at the time
that this person was born the Moon and Jupiter were in the constellation
of Sagittarius that puts them in number 9 or the third house. The Sun,
Mercury, Venus and Mars were altogether in the constellation of Aries
which puts them in quadrant number 1, at the bottom of the square,
which is the 7th house. Finally Saturn was in the constellation of Cancer
which puts it in quadrant number 4, at the right of the square which is the
10th house.‟
„This is all very confusing,‟ I said.
Hiremath smiled.
„Now, sir, we determine the strength of the planet. There are six factors
that determine the strength of the planet. The three main ones are the
zodiac sign that they are in, the house and the proximity of other planets.
Planets are strongest when they are in their own zodiac sign, together
with a friendly planet and in their appropriate house. In this case Mars is
very strong because it is in its zodiac sign, Aries, and is with a friendly
planet the Sun. The Sun itself is strong because it is exalted in Aries. Both
the Sun and Mars are known as malefic planets producing bad effects and
evil personalities. The Sun is known as being cruel and Mars is warlike.
The fact that they are very strong in this horoscope indicates that this
person will be cruel and warlike. Jupiter is also a strong planet in this
horoscope because it is in Sagittarius. The Sun, Jupiter and Mars are
masculine planets. They are very strong, with Mars being the most
dominant, suggesting that this person is male.
Sir this is very unusual, for three or more planets to be together in one
house. In this horoscope he has three planets in the 3rd house and four
planets in the 7th, this is an exceptionally unusual combination. People
who have three or four planets in a single house are extremely gifted.
135
 SECOND CHANCE

Albert Einstein had four planets in a single house. This four, three
combination means that this person had great enthusiasm, a very forceful
personality, great lustre and charisma, a love of fighting wars, lots of
anger, victory over enemies, good knowledge of occult sciences, a cruel
personality and death by weapons or fire. Can you guess who it is?‟
„Is it Adolf Hitler?‟ I asked.
„Sir you are very intelligent. Yes it is Adolf Hitler. There are many other
things that I could tell you about him based on the chart and all will give
you more details about his life. We can tell this all from his time and place
of birth. I can tell the same about your entire life from your time and
place of birth.‟
„It‟s amazing.‟
„Yes Sir. Sir would you like me to draw up your chart?‟
„I already have my chart. I had it done in Delhi; I can show it to you.‟
„Please Sir let me see.‟
I gave my Foresight horoscope to Hiremath for him to have a look at.
„Everyone has to be very careful of the Sun, Mars, Saturn, Rahu and
Ketu, as they are all malefic and can cause trouble in one‟s life. The planet
Mercury is influenced by the other planets; if Mercury is together with
any of these then it will also give trouble, as will the Moon in certain
circumstances. Now let me see.‟
Hiremath looked intently at the chart, his face creasing up with worry.
„What is it?‟
„You have a very good chart and will be very prosperous in your latter
years. At this time, the aspect of Jupiter and Saturn, the most powerful
planets, is not good. This disturbance is also affecting the Moon and
Mercury. This disturbance started seven years ago and has another nine
years left. It is caused by the 16 year cycle period of Jupiter. The effect of
this cycle is to cause high levels of stress, especially in marital
relationships. It will also affect your career. There will be many obstacles
and many rivals. You will ultimately succeed.‟
Hiremath looked at me. Now I was the one that was worried.
„Is there anything that can be done?‟
„Yes sir. There are many things that can be done. You see there are
three types of Karma. Dridha Karma which is fixed, you cannot do
anything about this Karma. Then there is Dridha-Adridha which is
fixed/non-fixed this Karma you can change but it requires significant
effort. Finally there is Adridha Karma which is non-fixed, this Karma can
be easily changed. The birth chart identifies your Karma and there are
certain things which will definitely happen; these are the Dridha Karma
and others that are very likely the Dridha-Adridha and those that have a
chance of happening which is the Adridha Karma.

136
 HOROSCOPES

So for you sir, the Dridha Karma is that you will ultimately prosper.
Right now is a period of Dridha-Adridha there are times of trouble which
can be minimised.‟
„But how can they be minimised ?‟
„There are a number of ways. One way is to call and offer gifts to the
gods that control the planets that are affecting your Karma. There are
special pujas that you can do. You can go to the temple. You can fast on
their special days. To appease Mercury you need to fast on Wednesdays,
to appease Jupiter you need to fast on Thursdays, to appease Saturn you
have to fast on Saturdays. There are also special mantras that can help.
But there is one method which is the most powerful, that always works.‟
„Which method is that?‟ I asked.
„That, Sir, is by wearing certain gemstones. It is a very specialised area
of Astrology. It is the area that I am the most expert in. Only a trained
Jyotish can select the right gem and activate it properly for it to be
effective. Your situation is especially complex, because of the interaction
of Mercury, Moon, Saturn and Jupiter. It requires very special selection of
the gem stones which have the correct characteristics.‟
„But how do these gem stones work?‟
„Sir that is very good question. The gem stones are crystals, special
crystals that filter and block gravitational waves from the planets. The
gem stone for Mercury is emerald, the emerald crystal reduces the
strength of gravitational waves from Mercury so that they affect to you
less. Sir you would have seen light passing through crystal prism split into
colours of rainbow.‟
„Yes I have seen that.‟
„Sir this is the same effect. This changes the gravity waves from the
planets.‟
„So what gems will I need?‟
„Sir you will need a pearl to help your relations with the moon, the pearl
will help you keep calm. A blue sapphire to please Saturn and help you
overcome your enemies, an emerald for Mercury and a topaz or Guru
stone for Jupiter. They will need to be carefully chosen. I will have to do
the calculations so that I can get the right strength.‟
„It sounds expensive.‟
„Sir, what is the cost of peace? I have a special person that can get the
stones at a good price.‟
„How much will it be?‟
„Sir you have to get very good quality stones, otherwise they will not
work. For good quality, the guru and blue sapphire will be Rs70,000 each.
The emerald and the pearl will be Rs50,000.‟
„So it will cost me around 2 lakhs (1 lakh is 100,000 rupees
approximately US$2,500).‟
„Yes sir. Shall I get the rings made?‟
137
 SECOND CHANCE

„Let me think about it and I will let you know. Thank you for your time
in explaining all these things to me.‟
„You are most welcome Sir.‟
I left Hiremath and went home.
„2 lakhs !‟ Shouted Rita.
„Yes, 2 lakhs,‟ I replied.
„See I told you that this will only end up with you spending money.
Sunil and Hiremath are in this together. He buys you a drink for Rs100
and you end up spending Rs2lakhs.‟ Rita was getting quite angry. The
best thing for me to do was to shut up and not say anything, but I didn‟t.
„But there was some sense in what Hiremath was saying. I know that it
is a lot of money.‟
„You are so gullible.‟
„You always say that,‟ I protested.
„Look why don‟t you speak to Anand about this and see what he has to
say,‟ suggested Rita.
„Okay. But if he says that it‟s a good idea then will you let me do it?‟
„You always do what you want to do,‟ Rita replied.
I had been intrigued with Hitler‟s chart. I went on to the internet and
came across this rather curious article about Hitler‟s formative
experiences during World War I:
―In the art of soldiering, Hitler was a consummate professional, and this gained
him a great amount of respect with his comrades. It took nerves of steel to rush,
deliver and return with staff messages in the midst of a heavy barrage. Hitler's
survival against suicidal odds gave him a certain mystique in the eyes of his
comrades.
In regards to the question of survival and fate (a matter that plagued every
protagonists mind), there were two veins of thought. Many believed in luck.
Chaos and random factors dictated the chances of living and the chances of dying.
Others saw the hand of providence behind almost every major sequence of events.

138
 HOROSCOPES

Hitler, given his personality, became obsessed (obsessed even in the eyes of fellow
veterans!) with an idea that he was being preserved by a divine force. Later, as
Fuhrer, he would emphasize a number of examples that backed his beliefs. In the
first case, Hitler recalled how a mysterious voice had told him to leave a crowded
dugout during a minor barrage. Within minutes of walking out into the trenches
an incoming shell flattened the bunker killing all of its occupants.
The second and even stranger event occurred either at the beginning or the end of the
war (records are confused). Private Henry Tandey, a highly decorated British
soldier, was presented with a clear shot of Hitler trying to get back to his lines.
Instead of pulling the trigger, the Englishman let him go - a moment of compassion
that perversely sentenced the world to further suffering. Hitler, having seen Tandey
lower his rifle, felt that the gods of war had intervened on his behalf and, strange as
it may seem, had a picture of his 'savior' hung on a wall at Berchtesgaden
It would have been easy for Private Tandey to shoot; after all he had been killing
Germans all day. However, as the enemy solider limped from the smoke into his
gun sights, the British infantry man held his fire. The German was clearly
wounded and though Tandey took aim, he was unable to shoot. The wounded man
nodded his thanks and disappeared back into the gloom.
The incident was over in a flash and though the German would never forget the
kindness, Henry Tandey would not recall the events for another twenty years.
The fighting of the 28 September 1918, around the French village of Marcoing,
had been exceptionally heavy. Henry Tandey had single-handedly destroyed a
German machine gun nest; braved enemy gunfire to bridge a huge hole that was
halting British attacks and led a bayonet charge against a far larger force. He was
by all accounts a hero.

Tandey was later awarded the VC for his exploits and immortalized in a painting
by the Italian artist Fortunio Matania. He left the army in 1926 and lived out a
quite life in Leamington, England.
In 1938 war was brewing in Europe. In a last ditch effort to avoid conflict, the
British Prime Minister, Neville Chamberlain, visited Adolf Hitler in Germany.
139
 SECOND CHANCE

During the talks Hitler invited Chamberlain to his retreat in Berchtesgaden in

Bavaria. The hideout was lavishly decorated with many German works of art.
However, one painting stood out, a copy of Fortunio Matania‘s depiction of Private
Tandey (he is the one carrying the wounded soldier on his shoulders).
When Chamberlain questioned Hitler over the painting of the British soldiers, the
dictator pointed at the picture and explained:
‗that man came so near to killing me that I thought I should never see Germany
again, providence saved me from such devilishly accurate fire as those English boys
were aiming at us.‘
Hitler then asked Chamberlain to pass on his thanks to Private Tandey.
On returning to England, Chamberlain contacted Tandey and recounted his
conversation with Hitler. At the time Tandey was nonchalant about his wartime
restraint. However, as the Second World War sparked into life across the globe his
feeling changed. He twice narrowly escaped death during German bombing raids in
Coventry and London, and would later tell a journalist:
‗If only I had known what he would turn out to be. When I saw all the people and
woman and children he had killed and wounded I was sorry to God I let him go.‘
It appears that our hero was haunted for the remainder of his life by his failure to
kill Hitler. At the age of 49 he unsuccessfully tried to rejoin this old regiment,
telling everyone that Hitler wouldn‘t escape a second time.
Private Henry Tandey outlived Hitler, dying in 1977. His ashes were scattered at
Marcoing with his fallen comrades.
However, the story doesn‘t end there. A debate still exists as to the validity of
Hitler‘s claim.
Destruction of military records makes it impossible to clarify the exact location of
Hitler on 28 September 1918, though Hitler‘s regiment was in the region of
Marcoing at the time. However, there is no doubt that Hitler owned the painting.
British records clearly show that in 1937, the German Leader personally requested
a copy of the painting from Tandey‘s Old regiment (the Green Howards).
However, one mystery remains. The painting by Fortunio Matania does depict
Henry Tandey, but not at Marcoing in 1918. Instead, it shows our hero at the
earlier battle of Ypres in 1914.
After the war, Henry Tandey told journalists that he made a habit of not shooting
wounded soldiers, though this is not collaborated elsewhere. Yet, we know for
certain that Hitler fought in the battle of Ypres in 1914 and was wounded. This
leaves the chance that Hitler simply mixed up the dates.
However, personally I feel there may be a simpler explanation. At the time the
painting was the only one in existence showing Private Tandey. During his meeting
140
 HOROSCOPES

with Chamberlain, Hitler had pointed at the reproduction and said ‗that‘s the
man who nearly shot me.‘ It may be that Hitler was aware that the picture was of
1914, but wished to have a reminder of the man who had not killed him.‖
There was definitely a lot of spiritual activity going on in Adolf Hitler‟s
life, and his horoscope seemed to have predicted it.
I had to meet with Anand as soon as I could.
„My dear Arjuna. Please come and sit. How have you been dear?‟
„Very good. It has been a busy time. Much has happened since I spoke
to you in Bangalore.‟
„Tell me. But first let us have a cup of tea.‟
The tea came and we talked about the auras that I had seen, the meeting
with Sunil and with Hiremath.
„My dear, astrology is a science as well as an art,‟ said Anand.
„What do you mean?‟
„You have to be careful that you find someone who truly understands
and has the right cosmic connection to interpret the signs properly. The
true Jyotish has to have some spiritual gift, which will have been given to
him by his guru. It is this spiritual gift of interpretation which makes a
Jyotish accurate in his predictions and also remedies.‟
„Hiremath told me that wearing an emerald, a guru, a pearl and a blue
sapphire would be helpful for me. Is what he told me true?‟
„Gem stones can definitely help. They are similar to using crystals to
help with meditation. So can mantras, pujas and fastings. But you have to
be very, very careful. Sometimes things can go very wrong, especially with
the blue sapphire.‟
„What kind of things can go wrong?‟
„There was a very close of friend of mine who was having some
problems in his life. He was coming to me for Reiki healing and
meditation. It was working and I told him to be patient and that
everything would work out for the best, but that it would take time. He
was in a hurry. He found a Jyotish who told him a lot of things about his
life. My friend believed that this Jyotish had some special gift and had
been blessed, and so started to believe everything that he was told by this
Jyotish. The Jyotish advised my friend to wear a blue sapphire, to help
him overcome his enemies and get a promotion at work. My friend came
to me, just as you have come to me, to discuss what he should do. I
advised him not to waste his money on the blue sapphire. I also warned
him that the blue sapphire is a very powerful stone and can sometimes
have deadly consequences. My friend ignored my advice and started
wearing the stone. Within two weeks his mother, who had been very
healthy and active, was dead. The blue sapphire had killed her.‟
„His mother‟s death was because of his wearing the blue sapphire? Are
you sure?‟ I asked.

141
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes it was definitely the sapphire that caused the death. It is a very
powerful stone. With powerful medicine you also get powerful side
effects. Morphine is a very powerful pain killer, but it is highly addictive
and if you keep on taking it, it will kill you. Blue sapphires are the most
powerful stones that are available, diamonds are also powerful. If the
sapphire is wrongly diagnosed, or if it is of the wrong strength it will be
deadly and cause more harm than good.‟
„What about the other stones that he told me to wear; the emerald, guru
and the pearl?‟
„Those stones are weaker than the blue sapphire. But I would never
advise anyone to wear such a cocktail of stones. It is the same as taking a
cocktail of drugs. You can take one for blood pressure and another one
for a headache, but there may be a reaction between the two of them that
may cause damage to your liver. The same can occur with certain
combinations of stones. The more gem stones that you wear, the greater
the risk that something terrible is going to happen to you.‟
„So what is your advice for me?‟ I asked.
„My dear Arjuna, please do not wear any of those stones. Take my
advice. Do not be like my friend. Please save yourself the money.
Everything will be okay in your life, just have patience and trust in god.
All things will be given to those that are deserving,‟ Anand was speaking
very softly and I could see that there were tears welling in his eyes.
„Please do not wear the stones,‟ he said once again.
„Promise me,‟ Anand got hold of my hands and was holding them
tightly and looking straight into my eyes.
„Something bad may happen if I wear them?‟ I asked.
„Not may happen. Something bad is bound to happen. Please, I beg
you, don‟t wear them.‟
„Okay I will not,‟ I said.
„Promise me,‟ said Anand, holding my hands more firmly than before.
„I promise,‟ with that Anand let go of my hands and gave me a big hug.
„You do not know how close you were to getting into big trouble,‟ said
Anand.
We talked a little more and had another cup of tea.
I told Rita what Anand had told me about the deadly effects of the blue
sapphire on his friend‟s mother.
„See I told you that there is something in this astrology thing; and that
what Hiremath was saying was not totally wrong,‟ I wanted to make sure
that Rita acknowledged that I wasn‟t totally mad in believing in astrology.
„You always want to win. There may be something in astrology. But that
does not mean that you must waste your money behind such things,
especially if you do not understand them. You were lucky that you have a
friend like Anand, who knows about such things, that can give you the
right advice and warn you of the dangers,‟ replied Rita.
142
 HOROSCOPES

Rita was right. I had had a lucky escape. I couldn‟t help wondering how
it could be that the position of the planets at the time of birth could have
such predictive powers. My horoscope had many specific points about
my personality, which could have been extremely lucky guesses – but the
odds of that happening by accident were very small. Then there was
Adolf Hitler‟s horoscope. It was very different from mine and extremely
unusual with the two groupings of planets. A very rare combination,
resulting in devastating consequences for the world. But, that led to an
even more perplexing question: what kind of spiritual force would
preserve such a man, rescuing him multiple times from certain death only
to cause World War II leading to between 62 – 78million dead?

143
SECOND CHANCE

144
 10 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

I never did go back to Hiremath. He rang me a couple of times warning

me that there were difficult times ahead, and that the only way in which I
would get through them would be to wear the rings. I felt that there was
something in what Sunil and Hiremath had said. However, I wasn‟t
convinced that they knew, in sufficient detail, as to why and how it
worked to trust their diagnoses and remedies. Rita was relieved that I had
not spent any more money or time in that avenue of investigation.
I continued to meet with Anand and practice my Reiki meditation. I
looked forward to my times of meditation. It was getting easier and easier
to see auras. But I was still restless, I wanted to see and experience
quicker results. I seemed to have reached a plateau after I had become a
Reiki Master. I felt at peace during meditation, but outside of meditation
I was my same old self. I was just as anxious and agitated as I had always
been. Sometimes I felt that I was even more heated and reactive in my
response than before. I had hoped that Reiki would bring internal
calmness, and all my troubles would simply melt away. However, the
opposite seemed to be true. I felt that things were getting more difficult
at work with some of my colleagues and business partners. I put these
factors down to problems of doing business in India.
Several months went by. I had got to know Anand a little better. Some
of his behaviour did not fit in with what I expected to be the fruits of
over a decade of Reiki meditation. We were together at a wedding of a
mutual friend, and suddenly, Anand started shouting angrily at the bride‟s
family. For the next couple of weeks he refused to talk to anyone. This
did not make sense to me. How could someone, who had spent so long
in Reiki, react in this way? I began to critically examine whether I was
really benefiting from Reiki, whether I was really getting calmer and more
at peace. I gradually stopped the Reiki meditation.
145
 SECOND CHANCE

I wondered whether I had imagined it all. Had I really seen the auras?
Had I really entered into Rita‟s dream? Could I really read people‟s
minds? I was no longer sure whether any of these things had really
happened, was it simply my imagination carrying me away into fantasy
land?
One idle Sunday evening, I was tidying up my travel bag which had
been getting heavier and heavier with papers. I have this habit of just
putting things in it which I‟m reluctant to throw away, in case they might
be useful in the future. As I was throwing away things that had been in
there for months, I came across the second book that I had bought at the
Oberoi in Bangalore three months earlier, „An Autobiography of A Yogi‟.
I had quite forgotten about it, caught up in the excitement of seeing
auras, horoscopes and astrology. I remembered that the owner of the
book shop had been very enthusiastic about the book.
Now was a good time to read it. It was the autobiography of
Paramahansa Yogananda, an extremely gifted Indian guru born in
Gorakhpur, Northeast India near the Himalayas, in 1893. In the book he
described Yogis, great spiritual men, their mystical powers and the
mystical experiences that had shaped his life. It was a biography of his life
and his experience with a meditation technique called Kriya Yoga. This
was a technique that had been rediscovered and revived by his guru‟s
guru, Sri Lahiri Mahasaya, who had learnt it from an extraordinary guru
called Babaji. This Kriya Yoga seemed to be a very powerful meditation
that had the effect of burning up your negative karma, thereby
accelerating your journey to ultimate union with the supreme cosmic
spirit.
Once I started reading the book I couldn‟t put it down. The things that
Paramahansa was writing about were really supernatural, yet I had been
experiencing the same things that he was describing, although not to the
same level of intensity. His descriptions of his gurus and the other
mystics that he met in his life‟s journey were spellbinding. It was all so
fantastic that I couldn‟t decide whether it was really true, or whether he
had made it up. Yet as I said before, I too had experienced some of what
he was writing about.
It is a remarkable autobiography. No wonder the book owner was so
enthusiastic in recommending it. I cannot help briefly describing some of
the Yogis mentioned by Paramahansa Yogananda. The first is Babaji.
Babaji was the guru, teacher, of Sri Lahiri Mahasaya (1828-1895) who
was the guru of Sri Swami Yukteswar Giri (1855-1936) who was the guru
of Paramahansa Yogananda (1893-1952). Paramahansa (PY for short
from now on) describes Babaji in chapter 33, entitled „Babaji, the Yogi-
Christ of Modern India‟. PY writes that Babaji is a deathless avatar. This
Sanskrit word means „descent‟, signifying the descent of divinity into
flesh.
146
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

PY writes ‗Babaji bears no marks of age on his body. He appears to be a youth

of not more than twenty-five. Fair skinned, of medium build and height, Babaji‘s
beautiful, strong body radiates a perceptible glow. He may be hundreds or even
thousands of years old, and is still living. … Babaji is ever in communion with
Christ; together they send out vibrations of redemption and have planned the
spiritual technique of salvation for this age. The work of these two fully illumined
masters – one with a body, and one without a body – is to inspire the nations to
forsake wars, race hatred, religious sectarianism, and the boomerang evils of
materialism. .. That there is no historical reference to Babaji need not surprise us.
The great guru has never openly appeared in any century; the misinterpreting glare
of publicity has no place in his millennial plans…. Great prophets like Christ and
Krishna come to earth for a specific and spectacular purpose; they depart as soon as
it is accomplished. Other avatars, like Babaji, undertake work that is concerned
more with the slow evolutionary progress of man during the centuries than with any
one outstanding event in history. Babaji has been given many different titles, Maha
Yogi (greatest Yogi), Shiva Baba (an avatar of Shiva). His purpose is to help
and guide today‘s yogis and prophets.
My guru‘s guru Lahiri Mahasaya described how he first met Babaji: ―I was 33
when I first met Babaji, in the autumn of 1861. I was stationed as an accountant
in Danapur in the Military Engineering Department. One day a telegram arrived
transferring me to the Himalayan site of Ranikhet, over 500miles away. I arrived
there and settled down. In my free time I would climb the nearby hills. One day I
came upon a cave and in that cave was a young man. He called out ‗Lahiri, you
have come‘. I was astonished that he knew my name. He beckoned me to sit down
and then he said ‗Lahiri do you remember that seat?‘ This was the first time that
I had been there. I didn‘t know what he was talking about.
I replied, ‗No sir‘. I was getting quite perplexed by the whole episode. I told him
that I must get back to the office, to which the young man replied in English, ‗The
office was brought for you, and not you for the office.‘ I was surprised that he spoke
in such good English and that he had paraphrased Jesus Christ saying ‗The
Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath.‘ The young man, who
was Babaji, continued ‗I see the telegram that I sent to you did its job, it was I who
silently suggested to your superior officer to send you a telegram. Lahiri, are you
sure that you do not recognize this place?‘
I remained silent, and then Babaji touched my forehead. At his magnetic touch, a
wondrous current swept through my brain, releasing the sweet seed-memories of my
previous life.
‗I remember,‘ I shouted. ‗You are my guru Babaji. Here in this cave I spent many
years of my last incarnation. Now I am united with you once again.‘ Tears of joy
were streaming down my face.
‗For more than three decades I have waited for you to return to me,‘ said Babaji.
He continued, ‗You slipped away and disappeared into the tumultuous waves of
147
 SECOND CHANCE

the life beyond death. The magic wand of your karma touched you, and you were
gone! I pursued you over the luminescent astral sea where the glorious angels sail.
As you lived out your human term of womb life, and emerged as a babe, my eye
was ever on you. I was invisibly present, watching over you, waiting for the time to
contact you again. This is the time, right now. Tonight you will be freed from your
last bond of your karma and will be initiated into Kriya Yoga.
Long ago you expressed a desire to live in a palace. Tonight I will satisfy this
desire, and then you will no longer be attached to this material world. Come follow
me. I walked out and in the distance I could see a luminescent glow. As we walked
towards the glow a palace stood before us, in dazzling gold. Ornamented with
countless jewels, set amidst landscaped gardens, reflected in tranquil pools – a
spectacle of unparalleled grandeur! Towering archways were intricately inlaid with
great diamonds, sapphires and emeralds. Men of angelic countenance were stationed
by bright red gates, resplendent with rubies. I asked Babaji the origin of this
mysterious palace.
‗I will gladly enlighten you,‘ said Babaji. ‗There is nothing inexplicable about this
materialization. The whole cosmos is a projected thought of the Creator. The heavy
clod of the earth, floating in space, is a dream of God‘s. He made all things out of
His mind, even as man in his dream consciousness reproduces in vivifies a creation
with its creatures. The Lord first formed the earth as an idea. He quickened it;
atomic energy and then matter came into being. He co-ordinated earth atoms into a
solid sphere. All its molecules are held together by the will of God. When He
withdraws His will, all earth atoms will be transformed into energy. Atomic energy
will return to its source consciousness. The earth idea will disappear from
objectivity.
The substance of a dream is held in materialization by the subconscious thought of
the dreamer. When that cohesive thought is withdrawn in wakefulness, the dream
and its elements dissolve. A man closes his eyes and erects a dream-creation which,
on awakening, he effortlessly dematerializes. He follows the divine archetypal
pattern. Similarly, when he awakens in cosmic consciousness, he effortlessly
dematerializes the illusion of a cosmic-dream universe.
In tune with the infinite all-accomplishing Will, I [Babaji] am able to command
the elemental atoms to combine and manifest themselves into this golden palace,
and then through the power of my will the atoms will be held together in this
configuration, until the palace has served its purpose. At which point I will
effortlessly dematerialize it.
I went into the palace and spent the night there. In the morning, my desire for the
palace and other earthly desires had evaporated; soon after I was initiated into the
meditational technique of Kriya Yoga. That is how I met my Guru Babaji.‘
I couldn‟t believe what I was reading. Did it really happen, is there really
a Babaji? PY‟s book had photos of Sri Lahiri Mahasaya, so it was clear
148
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

that he had lived in India and was an accountant in the Government of

India. But was this just a story, a simple figment of Lahiri‟s vivid
imagination, or did it really happen?
I read on. There were other strange people described in his book. One
of these was a lady, Giri Bala, who employed a certain yoga technique
that enabled her to live without eating. She lived in a village called Biur in
the Bankura District in West Bengal. She was over sixty when PY met
her. She had not eaten since she was twelve years old. She told the story
of how she had stormed out of her home saying that she would never eat
again. She had gone to the nearby lake and was contemplating what she
had said when the following happened.
Giri Bala told PY when he visited her:
‗Suddenly my guru materialised in front of me. He said, ‗Dear little one, God has
sent me to fulfil your urgent prayer. From today you shall live by the astral light;
your bodily atoms shall be recharged by the infinite current.‘ I did not understand
what he meant, but I accepted that from this time on I would not need to eat. My
Guru initiated me into a Kriya technique that freed me from dependence on
material food of mortals. The technique includes the use of a certain mantra and a
very difficult breathing exercise. My Guru gave me strict instructions that I was not
to share this secret with anyone. I believe that this happened to prove that
Mankind is Spirit; that by divine advancement we can all learn to live by the
Eternal Light and not on food.‘
PY wrote that the local Maharaja had heard about this extraordinary
lady. He invited her to his home and did his own experiments to verify
that she was not eating. For three months he kept her in a part of the
palace, where there was no access to any food. She remained healthy, the
Maharaja was convinced that this lady, Giri Bala, was truly feeding on the
Eternal Light and did not require any food.
It was PY‟s explanation of this phenomenon that intrigued me the
most. PY explained:
‗The non-eating state attained by Giri Bala is a yogic power mentioned in
Patanjali‘s Yoga Sutras. She employs a certain breathing exercise that affects the
vishuddha chakra, the fifth centre of subtle energies located in the spine. The
vishuddha chakra, opposite the throat, controls the fifth element, akash or ether,
pervasive in the intra-atomic spaces of the physical cells. Concentration of this
chakra (―wheel‖) enables the devotee to live by etheric energy. Her nourishment is
derived from the finer energies of the air and sunlight, and from the cosmic power
that recharges her body through the medulla oblongata.‘
I was fascinated that PY attempted to give a scientific, cause and effect,
explanation to this miraculous phenomenon; rather than just say it
happens because god wills it.

149
 SECOND CHANCE

There were other Yogis, saints, that he met which he vividly described
in his book; each of them with strange and unique powers. One of them,
Gandha Baba, had the ability to create any scent that he desired.
PY describes how he, when he was in his teens, met Gandha Baba in a
house near the Kalighat Temple in Calcutta:
‗I looked directly at the saint; his quick gaze rested on mine. He was plump and
bearded, with dark skin and large, gleaming eyes.
"Son, I am glad to see you. Say what you want. Would you like some perfume?"
"What for?" I thought his remark rather childish.
"To experience the miraculous way of enjoying perfumes."
"Harnessing God to make odours?"
"What of it? God makes perfume anyway."
"Yes, but He fashions frail bottles of petals for fresh use and discard. Can you
materialize flowers?"
"I materialize perfumes, little friend."
"Then scent factories will go out of business."
"I will permit them to keep their trade! My own purpose is to demonstrate the
power of God."
"Sir, is it necessary to prove God? Isn't He performing miracles in everything,
everywhere?"
"Yes, but we too should manifest some of His infinite creative variety."
"How long did it take to master your art?"
"Twelve years."
"For manufacturing scents by astral means! It seems, my honoured saint, you have
been wasting a dozen years for fragrances which you can obtain with a few rupees
from a florist's shop."
"Perfumes fade with flowers."
"Perfumes fade with death. Why should I desire that which pleases the body only?"
"Mr. Philosopher, you please my mind. Now, stretch forth your right hand." He
made a gesture of blessing.
I was a few feet away from Gandha Baba; no one else was near enough to contact
my body. I extended my hand, which the yogi did not touch.
"What perfume do you want?"
"Rose."
"Be it so."
To my great surprise, the charming fragrance of rose was wafted strongly from the
centre of my palm. I smilingly took a large white scentless flower from a near-by
vase.
"Can this odourless blossom be permeated with jasmine?"
"Be it so."
A jasmine fragrance instantly shot from the petals. I thanked the wonder-worker
and seated myself by one of his students. He informed me that Gandha Baba,
whose proper name was Vishudhananda, had learned many astonishing yoga

150
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

secrets from a master in Tibet. The Tibetan yogi, I was assured, had attained the
age of over a thousand years.‘
PY, as a teenager, did not, at the time, think much of this power to
produce scents and materialise objects. However, later on, PY realised
how great Gandha Baba was and how he could perform such miracles:
‗Years later I understood by inner realization how Gandha Baba accomplished his
materializations. The method, alas, is beyond the reach of the world's hungry
hordes.
The different sensory stimuli to which man reacts—tactual, visual, gustatory,
auditory, and olfactory—are produced by vibratory variations in electrons and
protons. The vibrations in turn are regulated by "lifetrons" that are subtle life
forces, finer-than-atomic energies intelligently charged with the five distinctive
sensory idea-substances.
Gandha Baba, tuning himself with the cosmic force by certain yogic practices, was
able to guide the lifetrons to rearrange their vibratory structure and objectivise the
desired result. His perfume, fruit and other miracles were actual materializations of
mundane vibrations, and not inner sensations hypnotically produced.‘
I wondered what it would be like to have the ability to do such a thing;
but PY stopped me from this train of thought by his sobering comment:
‗Performances of miracles such as shown by the "Perfume Saint" are spectacular
but spiritually useless. Having little purpose beyond entertainment, they are
digressions from a serious search for God.‘
PY described other Yogis that he met: Nagendra Nath Bhaduri, who
had the ability to levitate and Swami Pranabananda, who could materialise
his body in two different places simultaneously. PY claimed that he had
met these Yogis and that he had experienced them performing these
miraculous feats. His book contained photos of these saints, and he had
given sufficient detail for anyone to verify whether or not they had
existed (some time in the early 1900s, mostly in and around Calcutta,
West Bengal). But these things are very difficult to verify in India, where
the records are not so good and people are happy to tell you what you
want to hear.
I was looking for an opportunity to verify what PY was writing. I had
become a little more cautious after the incident with Hiremath and Sunil.
It was to the end of his book in Chapter 39, that I got the opportunity to
do such a thing. PY described how he had gone to Europe to meet a
„European‟ Saint, Therese Neumann, who lived in Konnersreuth in
Germany.
PY met her on 16th July, 1935. He was keen to meet Therese Neumann
because he had read the following about her. PY writes:

151
 SECOND CHANCE

‗I wanted to make a special pilgrimage to Bavaria. This would be my only chance,

I felt, to visit the great Catholic mystic, Therese Neumann of Konnersreuth.
Years earlier I had read an amazing account of Therese. Information given in the
article was as follows:
(1) Therese, born in 1898, had been injured in an accident at the age of twenty;
she became blind and paralyzed.
(2) She miraculously regained her sight in 1923 through prayers to St. Teresa,
"The Little Flower." Later Therese Neumann's limbs were instantaneously
healed.
(3) From 1923 onward, Therese has abstained completely from food and drink,
except for the daily swallowing of one small consecrated wafer.
(4) The stigmata, or sacred wounds of Christ, appeared in 1926 on Therese's
head, breast, hands, and feet. On Friday of every week thereafter, she has passed
through the Passion of Christ, suffering in her own body all his historic agonies.
(5) Knowing ordinarily only the simple German of her village, during her Friday
trances Therese utters phrases which scholars have identified as ancient Aramaic.
At appropriate times in her vision, she speaks Hebrew or Greek.
(6) By ecclesiastical permission, Therese has several times been under close scientific
observation. Dr. Fritz Gerlick, editor of a Protestant German newspaper, went to
Konnersreuth to "expose the Catholic fraud," but ended up by reverently writing
her biography.
As always, whether in East or West, I was eager to meet a saint. I rejoiced as our
little party entered, on July 16th, the quaint village of Konnersreuth. The Bavarian
peasants exhibited lively interest in our Ford automobile (brought with us from
America) and its assorted group—an American young man, an elderly lady, and
an olive-hued Oriental with long hair tucked under his coat collar.‘
I was amazed that there was a European, a Roman Catholic woman,
who was exhibiting the same powers and ability as an Indian mystic.
When PY met Therese Neumann she had been living purely on a little
water and the Holy Communion, a small sugary wafer, for over thirteen
years without any harmful effects. It seemed that this ability that Giri
Bala, the Lady Saint in India, was not confined to India and Hindus but
was also manifesting elsewhere.
I went on the internet and searched for references to Therese
Neumann. I came across a German site which fortunately had an English
translation with a detailed description of Therese Neumann and her life.
Therese Neumann was a real person; she was born in 1898 and passed
away in 1962. Thousands of people came to see her, including World War
II American GIs. More importantly, for me, it appeared, at least from this
web site, that many doctors and the Roman Catholic Church had initially
152
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

been sceptical about Therese‟s claims, but on thorough investigation they

had concluded that there was something mystical about the occurrences;
they were confident that she was not a fraudster.
PY had described the stigmata wounds that he saw on Therese
Neumann. I had seen a Hollywood film of the same title, Stigmata, where
this young woman spontaneously received the same wounds that Jesus
Christ received during his crucifixion. I had always thought that this was
just some fanciful Hollywood imagination and that such a thing had
never happened, nor was it ever likely to.
But I was shocked at what I read and the pictures that I saw about
Therese Neumann, on this web site ( www.thereseneumann.de). This is
an extract of what I saw and read on the web site:
The stigmata concept is taken from the Greek word "stigma" and means "sign,
brand mark", in the strict sense "pierce or stab". Theologically speaking, it
circumscribes the stigmatization to be a spontaneous appearance of the scars Jesus
has suffered in his Passion (Stigmata), seen on the body of a living person,
especially on hands, feet, around the heart, head, shoulders and back. Psychology
sees it to be a mentally conditioned effect, Theology, to be a charismatic sign, and
the Sciences have no explanation at all until now. The wounds (Stigmata) stay
without festering or infection, cannot be treated medically, often remain open and
bleed on certain days, usually on Fridays, the day of the Passion of Jesus.
The first historically verified stigmatization is attributed to Franz of Assisi; he
lived in the 13th Century. Until the death of the Franciscan Fr. Pio von
Pietrelcina, Italy, in 1968, more than 300 instances of stigmatization are known.
Therese Neumann's stigmatization started on March 4, 1926, first with a wound
near her heart (see chapter Biography). In the following Friday-sufferings during
Lent 1926, not only the range of her vision enlarged, but with each suffering more
bleeding Stigmata appeared. Pastor Joseph Naber from Konnersreuth reported
about Therese's condition on Good Friday 1926: " When I, together with another
Priest, visited her [Therese] on Good Friday after lunch, [we] found her lying in
great torture, the eyes clogged with blood, two streamlets of blood running down her
cheeks, pale like a dying person. Until 3 o'clock, the Hour of Death of the Savior,
she struggled in terrible agony of death. ... During this death agony on Good
Friday, she had viewed all the sufferings of the Savior, beginning on the Mount of
Olives down to Calvary, and had shared it in a very intense way, even his
abandonment on the Cross. At that time, she had felt severe pain on the upper side
of her hands and feet. Now, both hands and feet show kind of round, open
wounds, out of them runs pure blood. Already several weeks before Easter,
suddenly a longish wound broke open in the area of her heart. At times, a lot of
pure blood came out of this wound. The Medical Doctor had scrutinized all these
wounds" (Gerlich, p. 114, Waldsassener Grenzzeitung, April 21, 1926).

153
 SECOND CHANCE

Therese Neumann, suffering on a Friday

Following Good Friday in 1926, the five wounds remained open for the next 14
days. They were always wet, but the amount of bleeding varied. Her parents
thought, that these suddenly new developed wounds had to be cured, and tried to
achieve some improvement with household remedies. Since these did not show any
result, they called the physician, Dr. Seidl, from Waldsassen. The form of the
wounds surprised Dr. Seidl, especially the extent of the side wound, 3.5 cm long
and 1 cm wide [1.38 x O.4 inch]. He prescribed an ointment. The treatment
caused a severe swelling of the wounds of her hands, feet and side. Therese was
seized by an almost unbearable pain, she hardly could endure it. Because of this,
the parents finally removed the bandages with the ointment and as a result, the
pain subsided rapidly and, eventually, disappeared. Dr. Seidl was astonished
about the peculiarity of the wounds, which - as long as they were left alone - neither
got infected nor purulent. "Henceforth, he refrained from all treatment, but
wrapped the wounds with a bandage only" (Gerlich, p.107). Following this advice,
Therese always was wearing a head-scarf and gloves with cut-off fingers to protect
the scabs of the wounds of her hands. Never again occurred an infection or festering
of the wounds.
The Stigmata never healed. For the rest of her life the wounds were clearly visible
in the palm and on the back of her hands, and on the sole and the upper side
(instep) of her feet. Until her death in 1962, the painful bleeding of the Stigmata
connected with the Friday, sufferings occurred 780 times. Whereas, the wounds of
scourging and her head wounds bled during the time of Passion only.
This was incredible; as was the account of Therese Neumann, not
eating any food:
‗Nevertheless, in 1940, there was an opportunity for a second observation and
verification of her life without taking food: "between July 07 - 13, Therese had to
stay in bed in the house of the Wutz family in Eichstaett [not in Konnersreuth, the
author], after she had suffered a stroke (Apoplexia cerebri), whereupon one half
side of her body was paralyzed. She was completely dependent on others. On order

154
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

of Bishop Michael Rackl, she was kept under strictest control during this time"
(Steiner, Lebensbild Therese Neumann, p. 28).
Statements given under oath of all participants of this Observation Committee,
participating Medical Doctors, University Professors as well as several
contemporary witnesses, proved Therese's life without taking any food to be true.
On January 15, 1953, in Eichstaett, Therese gave the following statement under
oath:

1. Not being able to give an exact date, eating less food was going on during the
illness following the accident in 1918, therefore around 1918/1919.

2. From Christmas 1926, I have been living entirely without taking food,
without any need for food and drink; during the time between Christmas
1926 and September 1927, I took a little spoon of water with the Holy
Host of Communion. Since that time, this also has been omitted; already
since August 6, 1926, I felt a real disgust at food and aversion to it.

3. For a certain length of time, I tried to take liquid food, yet I had to vomit
(with some choking) all of it, so I stopped the attempt. Since that time, I feel
much better, because the mentioned choking and connected heart-trouble have
disappeared. Already since Christmas 1922 until this day, swallowing (the
host of Holy Communion in [my] usual condition) causes greatest
discomforts.

4. ....I am convinced of it and to my knowledge, I live by the Sacramental

Saviour, He is within me...until shortly before the next receiving of Holy
Communion. Once the substance of the Sacrament has dissolved, I feel weak
and have a greater physical and spiritual longing for Holy Communion"
(Steiner, Visionen vol.2, p.287).‘
There were other websites that came up on a Google search. Some of
them mentioned other such Roman Catholic saints in the West. Three
names in particular came up Anne Catherine Emmerich
(www.emmerich1.com), Padre Pio (www.padrepio.net) and Maria
Esperanza of Venezuela (www.pdtsigns.com/betania.html).
The last lady Maria Esperanza of Venezuela was particularly interesting
as the website gave this brief summary of her life (she passed away in
2004):
‗Believers by the thousands travel to Venezuela to seek the blessings of a visionary
named Maria Esperanza. She lives deep within the forests. She claims to see
visions of the Virgin Mary who brings her the gift of healing.
This began when she was five years old. She has stigmata (bleeding) of the hands.
She is a wife, mother and grandmother. She is a prophet, healer, and can bi-locate
155
 SECOND CHANCE

(being in 2 places at once). She has prophesized the deaths of the last 3 Popes.
Some claim to see rose petals fall from the sky around her, not just the smell of
roses. One person tells that a budding rose came through her chest.‘
Other references to Maria Esperanza claim that one of her daughters
has seen her mother spontaneously levitate. I was astonished that this
lady living in our times had the combined gifts of three saints mentioned
by PY in Autobiography of a Yogi: the ability to produce scents of
Gandha Baba, the ability to bi-locate of Swami Pranabananda and the
ability to levitate of Nagendra Nath Bhaduri.
There seemed to be a link between the Christian faith of Therese
Neumann, Anne Catherine Emmerich, Padre Pio, Maria Esperanza and
the meditations, mantras of Hindu mystic Yogis. I was surprised at even
the possibility of such a link, as I had not experienced, nor heard about
anything remotely spiritual or mystical originating from churches in
England.
Anand had told me that Jesus Christ was Reiki Master who had trained
under Hindu gurus in India, when he was a teenager, before finally
returning to his home town, Nazareth. I wondered whether the
commonality between the miracles of Western Saints and Hindu yogis
was proof of a link between Christianity and Hinduism. That in fact they
were all the same.
PY‟s chapter on the science of Kriya Yoga gave such an explanation:
―The science of Kriya Yoga, mentioned so often in these pages, became widely
known in modern India through the instrumentality of Lahiri Mahasaya, my
guru's guru. The Sanskrit root of Kriya is kri, to do, to act and react; the same
root is found in the word karma, the natural principle of cause and effect. Kriya
Yoga is thus "union (yoga) with the Infinite through a certain action or rite." A
yogi who faithfully follows its technique is gradually freed from karma or the
universal chain of causation.
Because of certain ancient yogic injunctions, I cannot give a full explanation of
Kriya Yoga in the pages of a book intended for the general public. The actual
technique must be learned from a Kriyaban or Kriya Yogi; here a broad reference
must suffice.
Kriya Yoga is a simple, psycho-physiological method by which the human blood is
decarbonized and recharged with oxygen. The atoms of this extra oxygen are
transmuted into life current to rejuvenate the brain and spinal centers. By stopping
the accumulation of venous blood, the yogi is able to lessen or prevent the decay of
tissues; the advanced yogi transmutes his cells into pure energy. Elijah, Jesus, Kabir
and other prophets were past masters in the use of Kriya or a similar technique, by
which they caused their bodies to dematerialize at will.

156
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

Kriya is an ancient science. Lahiri Mahasaya received it from his guru, Babaji,
who rediscovered and clarified the technique after it had been lost in the Dark
Ages.
"The Kriya Yoga which I am giving to the world through you in this nineteenth
century," Babaji told Lahiri Mahasaya, "is a revival of the same science which
Krishna gave, millenniums ago, to Arjuna, and which was later known to
Patanjali, and to Christ, St. John, St. Paul, and other disciples."
Kriya Yoga is referred to by Krishna, India's greatest prophet, in a stanza of the
Bhagavad Gita(IV:29): "Offering inhaling breath into the outgoing breath, and
offering the outgoing breath into the inhaling breath, the yogi neutralizes both these
breaths; he thus releases the life force from the heart and brings it under his
control." The interpretation is: "The yogi arrests decay in the body by an addition
of life force, and arrests the mutations of growth in the body by apan (eliminating
current). Thus neutralizing decay and growth, by quieting the heart, the yogi learns
life control."
Kriya Yoga is mentioned twice by the ancient sage Patanjali, foremost exponent of
yoga, who wrote: "Kriya Yoga consists of body discipline, mental control, and
meditating on Aum." Patanjali speaks of God as the actual Cosmic Sound of
Aum heard in meditation. Aum is the Creative Word; the sound of the Vibratory
Motor. Even the yoga-beginner soon inwardly hears the wondrous sound of Aum.
Receiving this blissful spiritual encouragement, the devotee becomes assured that he
is in actual touch with divine realms. It is this same Word that is talked of by St
John: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the
Word was God. . . . All things were made by him; and without him was not
anything made that was made."-John 1:1-3.
Patanjali refers a second time to the life-control or Kriya technique thus:
"Liberation can be accomplished by that pranayama which is attained by
disjoining the course of inspiration and expiration."
St. Paul knew Kriya Yoga, or a technique very similar to it, by which he could
switch life currents to and from the senses. He was therefore able to say: "Verily, I
protest by our rejoicing which I have in Christ, I die daily." (I Corinthians 15:31)
By daily withdrawing his bodily life force, he united it by yoga union with the
rejoicing (eternal bliss) of the Christ consciousness. In that felicitous state, he was
consciously aware of being dead to the delusive sensory world of maya.
"Kriya Yoga is an instrument through which human evolution can be quickened,"
Sri Yukteswar explained to his students. "The ancient yogis discovered that the
secret of cosmic consciousness is intimately linked with breath mastery. This is
India's unique and deathless contribution to the world's treasury of knowledge. The
life force, which is ordinarily absorbed in maintaining the heart-pump, must be
freed for higher activities by a method of calming and stilling the ceaseless demands
of the breath."
157
 SECOND CHANCE

The Kriya Yogi mentally directs his life energy to revolve, upward and downward,
around the six spinal centers (medullar, cervical, dorsal, lumbar, sacral, and
coccygeal plexuses) which correspond to the twelve astral signs of the zodiac, the
symbolic Cosmic Man. One-half minute of revolution of energy around the sensitive
spinal cord of man effects subtle progress in his evolution; that half-minute of Kriya
equals one year of natural spiritual unfoldment.
The scriptures indicate that man requires a million years of normal, diseaseless
evolution to perfect his human brain sufficiently to express cosmic consciousness.
One thousand Kriya practiced in eight hours gives the yogi, in one day, the
equivalent of one thousand years of natural evolution: 365,000 years of evolution
in one year. In three years, a Kriya Yogi can thus accomplish by intelligent self-
effort the same result which nature brings to pass in a million years. The Kriya
short cut, of course, can be taken only by deeply developed yogis. With the guidance
of a guru, such yogis have carefully prepared their bodies and brains to receive the
power created by intensive practice.
The Kriya beginner employs his yogic exercise only fourteen to twenty-eight times,
twice daily. A number of yogis achieve emancipation in six or twelve or twenty-four
or forty-eight years. A yogi who dies before achieving full realization carries with
him the good karma of his past Kriya effort; in his new life he is harmoniously
propelled toward his Infinite Goal.
The body of the average man is like a fifty-watt lamp, which cannot accommodate
the billion watts of power roused by an excessive practice of Kriya. Through
gradual and regular increase of the simple and "foolproof" methods of Kriya, man's
body becomes astrally transformed day by day, and is finally fitted to express the
infinite potentials of cosmic energy—the first materially active expression of Spirit.
Kriya Yoga has nothing in common with the unscientific breathing exercises taught
by a number of misguided zealots. Their attempts to forcibly hold breath in the
lungs is not only unnatural but decidedly unpleasant. Kriya, on the other hand, is
accompanied from the very beginning by an accession of peace, and by soothing
sensations of regenerative effect in the spine.
The ancient yogic technique converts the breath into mind. By spiritual
advancement, one is able to cognize the breath as an act of mind—a dream-breath.
Many illustrations could be given of the mathematical relationship between man's
respiratory rate and the variations in his states of consciousness. A person whose
attention is wholly engrossed, as in following some closely knit intellectual
argument, or in attempting some delicate or difficult physical feat, automatically
breathes very slowly. Fixity of attention depends on slow breathing; quick or
uneven breaths are an inevitable accompaniment of harmful emotional states: fear,
lust, anger. The restless monkey breathes at the rate of 32 times a minute, in
contrast to man's average of 18 times. The elephant, tortoise, snake and other
animals noted for their longevity have a respiratory rate which is less than man's.
158
 HINDU YOGIS & CATHOLIC SAINTS

The tortoise, for instance, who may attain the age of 300 years, breathes only 4
times per minute.
The rejuvenating effects of sleep are due to man's temporary unawareness of body
and breathing. The sleeping man becomes a yogi; each night he unconsciously
performs the yogic rite of releasing himself from bodily identification, and of merging
the life force with healing currents in the main brain region and the six sub-
dynamos of his spinal centers. The sleeper thus dips unknowingly into the reservoir
of cosmic energy which sustains all life.
The voluntary yogi performs a simple, natural process consciously, not unconsciously
like the slow-paced sleeper. The Kriya Yogi uses his technique to saturate and feed
all his physical cells with undecaying light and keep them in a magnetized state.
Thus he removes himself from studied observance of natural laws, which can only
take him—by circuitous means as given by proper food, sunlight, and harmonious
thoughts—to a million-year Goal. It needs twelve years of normal healthful living
to effect even slight perceptible change in brain structure, and a million solar returns
are exacted to sufficiently refine the cerebral tenement for manifestation of cosmic
consciousness.
Introspection, or "sitting in the silence," is an unscientific way of trying to force
apart the mind and senses, tied together by the life force. The contemplative mind,
attempting its return to divinity, is constantly dragged back toward the senses by
the life currents. Kriya, controlling the mind directly through the life force, is the
easiest, most effective, and most scientific avenue of approach to the Infinite. In
contrast to the slow, uncertain "bullock cart" theological path to God, Kriya may
justly be called the "airplane" route.
The life of an advanced Kriya Yogi is influenced, not by effects of past actions, but
solely by directions from the soul. The devotee thus avoids the slow, evolutionary
monitors of egoistic actions, good and bad, of common life, cumbrous and snail-like
to the eagle hearts.
Identifying himself with a shallow ego, man takes for granted that it is he who
thinks, wills, feels, digests meals, and keeps himself alive, never admitting through
reflection (only a little would suffice!) that in his ordinary life he is naught but a
puppet of past actions (karma) and of nature or environment. Each man's
intellectual reactions, feelings, moods, and habits are circumscribed by effects of past
causes, whether of this or a prior life. Lofty above such influences, however, is his
regal soul. Spurning the transitory truths and freedoms, the Kriya Yogi passes
beyond all disillusionment into his unfettered Being. All scriptures declare man to
be not a corruptible body, but a living soul; by Kriya he is given a method to prove
the scriptural truth.
Kriya Yoga is the real "fire rite" often extolled in the Bhagavad Gita. The
purifying fires of yoga bring eternal illumination, and thus differ much from
outward and little-effective religious fire ceremonies, where perception of truth is oft
159
 SECOND CHANCE

burnt, to solemn chanted accompaniment, along with the incense! Referring to

yoga's sure and methodical efficacy, Lord Krishna praises the technological yogi in
the following words: "The yogi is greater than body-disciplining ascetics, greater
even than the followers of the path of wisdom (Jnana Yoga), or of the path of action
(Karma Yoga); be thou, O disciple Arjuna, a yogi!" (Bhagavad Gita, VI:46).‖
PY had convinced me that I had felt something real through my Reiki
experiences, that it wasn‟t my imagination. I had tapped into some cosmic
energy force. His explanations seemed plausible and scientific. It was
reassuring that there were other people, Hindu yogis and Catholic Saints
that were also experiencing the supernatural. It couldn‟t just be some
psychological hallucination. There were too many similarities between my
experiences and those that were in the book and on the internet.
I felt that Reiki was not working on me quickly enough. I needed
something more powerful, something like Kriya Yoga that could
accelerate a million years of spiritual evolution into as little as 3.5 years. I
had outgrown Reiki and my guru, Anand. I wanted to get to a higher
plane; this Kriya Yoga seemed to be a way. I needed to find another
guru.

160
 11 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

Some more time passed by. I was growing increasingly restless. I had
not found another guru. I was waiting for the „cosmic forces‟ to direct
me, as they had done when I met Anand. Many had heard of
Paramahansa Yogananda (PY) but no one could tell me where I could go
to find out more about Kriya Yoga. It seemed that it was not so popular
in India. PY seemed to have spent his time promoting Kriya Yoga in
America, neglecting his home country.
My project to find suitable investments for Big Group was almost
drawing to an end; another 12 months and it would be time to move on.
Things were about to happen.
It was a Friday, Republic Day, 26th January 2001. It was a public
holiday, Rita was back in England, and I was alone in the apartment
together with Ganshyam (my cook and house help). It was a lazy day. I
was taking things easy and Ganshyam was preparing a cup of tea and
some puri for me.
I felt a strange tingling in my head, the birds in the garden stopped
singing then the floor started to move. It was as if the whole building was
on a boat, which was gently rocking from side to side on the waves of the
open sea. The movement from side to side was getting bigger and bigger.
I went into the kitchen and looked at Ganshyam quizzically. He looked at
me and shouted „Sir, it‟s an earthquake, we have to get out!‟ At that
moment there were loud crashing noises inside the flat as various statues
and pictures fell off from the window and table.
I hadn‟t realised what was going on, I was still trying to process what
was going on. „Sir we have to go,‟ shouted Ganshyam, who was heading
for the front door.
Ganshyam opened the door and ran down the stairs; we were on the
fourth floor. I went down after him. By this time the whole floor was
161
 SECOND CHANCE

moving around from side to side, over a foot in each direction. I got to
the second floor. An old lady was sitting by the front door, paralysed with
fear. Her daughter-in-law was trying to get her to come down. I stopped
and lifted her onto her feet and calmly walked down the remaining flights
of stairs. By the time we reached the bottom the earthquake had stopped.
It had lasted just over thirty seconds.
It was only later that I realised that I, and the old lady, and the
daughter-in-law had been in the most dangerous position walking down
the stairs. If the building had collapsed it would have collapsed onto the
stairwell. Now I know that if you are near the top of a building in an
earthquake situation then your best bet is to get to the very top, the
chances of being killed by falling rubble are less, and being buried by lots
of rubble are less. Over 20,000 people died in that earthquake, mostly
near the epi-centre in Bhuj some 200km away.
I then made another foolish mistake, I went straight back into the
apartment and carried on as if nothing had happened. There were many
after tremors, not as severe as the first one. Each one of those could
have, potentially, further weakened the building, ultimately leading to its
collapse and my probable death.
The communiqué came from Big Group the next day. I was to be
evacuated to Mumbai, where I would now be based and told to find new
accommodation there. It wasn‟t long before I found a flat at the
prestigious NCPA apartment block, next to the Oberoi hotel; the same
hotel where, years earlier, I had spent my honeymoon. The flat was on
the 20th floor with breathtaking views of the Arabian Sea and the Queen‟s
Necklace, the colloquial term for Marine Drive a wide, eight lane,
sweeping semi-circular boulevard over a mile long running from Nariman
Point to Malabar Hill.
The whole apartment was occupied by the cream of the Mumbai
business community. A useful place to establish and develop contacts.
My neighbour, Prem Das, was a semi-retired financier in his late sixties.
His life revolved around the many clubs in South Mumbai; the Bombay
Gymkhana, Cricket Club and The Willingdon Club.
But Sunday was a special day of abstinence. On Sundays he would drive
up to Juhu, about an hour‟s drive, north of Nariman Point to the
ISKCON temple. ISKCON was the shortened form of International
Society for Krishna Consciousness, a religious group that was set up by
His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada in 1966, when
he was 70 years old. He was an extraordinary man, born in 1896,
Calcutta, who met his guru, Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Goswami in
1922. He retired from family life in 1950 (aged fifty four) and started a
multi-volume translation and commentary of the 18,000 verse Srimad
Bhagavatam in 1959, before passing away in 1977, aged 81 years. In the
11 years that he led ISKON it grew, from just himself, a small rented
162
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

apartment in New York with $17, to a worldwide confederation of more

than one hundred ashrams, schools, temples, institutes, and farm
communities.
One Sunday, Prem invited me to come with him to the ISKCON
temple. I accepted. Since Paramahansa Yogananda had mentioned the
Bhagvad Gita and Krishna several times in his discussion on the science
of Kriya Yoga. I knew that Swami Prabhupada had produced a
translation of the Bhagavad Gita and I was curious to find out more.
We are going to meet with Swami MK Devananda Das, he is the head
of the ISKCON temple in Juhu,‟ said Prem, on our drive from Nariman
Point to Juhu.
„That‟s great. Will I be able to ask him some questions?‟ I asked.
„Yes, that is why we are going. You can ask him anything you like. He is
a young fellow, just a little older than you. We will meet with him, do
some darshan at the temple, and then we will have lunch together,‟
replied Prem.
„Sounds like a good plan. How long have you been coming here?‟
„For the last ten years. I find that it gives me some peace. Swami
Devananda Das will be able to answer all your questions.‟
Prem didn‟t say much else during the rest of the drive up to the temple.
The temple was located in the heart of Juhu, surrounded by apartment
blocks on either side. The security guard opened the iron gate and saluted
Prem as we drove into the compound. It was a large building.
„This building is a temple, an office, a hotel and a hostel for the priests,‟
said Prem.
„You can become a life member of ISKCON and it will entitle you to
stay a certain number of nights here, plus other benefits,‟ he continued.
I nodded in agreement. Prem took his mobile phone and rang a
number.
„Hare Krishna Swamaji. This is Prem we have just come. I have a very
good friend with me.‟
Prem‟s driver pulled up in front of the entrance to the complex, got out
of the car and opened the door for Prem. A man in his forties with a
shaved head wearing a saffron robe came out and greeted us with a smile.
„Hare Krishna Swamaji. This is my friend Arjuna. He is my new
neighbour at the NCPA.‟
„Hare Krishna,‟ said Swami Devananda Das extending his hand to shake
mine.
„Hare Krishna,‟ I replied in kind, and shook his hand.
„Please come and follow me,‟ said the Swamaji as he led us up two
flights of stairs to his private office.
„May I please request you to leave your shoes outside,‟ said the Swamaji.

163
 SECOND CHANCE

There was a small ante-chamber to his office which had a very low desk
on one side and mattresses placed on the floor on the other side. At the
back of the room was a glass door leading to another small room.
„This looks very comfortable,‟ I said as we walked through the ante-
chamber.
„Yes it is. It is where I instruct others on the Bhagavad Gita. Please
come we will sit in my office, where we will not be disturbed. Sunday is
always a busy day, many devotees come and many people want to see me.
I have given strict instructions for us not to be disturbed,‟ replied the
Swamaji.
The Swamaji sat behind the large desk in his office, Prem and I sat on
the two chairs opposite. The desk had a neat pile of papers on one side,
the rest of the room was very, neatly organised.
„How are you Prem?‟ asked the Swamaji.
„I am at peace Swamaji. I have brought my friend Arjuna who has some
questions for you‟ replied Prem.
„Please tell me, what do you wish to know?‟ Swamaji was looking
straight at me.
„I have many questions. I guess fundamentally I am looking to find
peace, and want to know how to get it,‟ I asked.
Both Prem and the Swamaji laughed.
„You have come to the right place,‟ said the Swamaji.
„I am interested in the teachings of the Bhagavad Gita, especially on
what it says about yoga.‟
„This is a very good, and a very deep subject, Arjuna. It takes many
years to understand the subtleties of the Gita. In the Golden Age of
SatyaYuga men used to live for thousands of years, they had time to
study, understand and learn the Vedic secrets. Their minds were also less
polluted than ours. Unfortunately, this is the age of Kali Yuga; the age of
darkness. Men do not live very long. Our minds are incapable of fully
digesting the contents of the Gita. That is why in this age, Lord Krishna,
recommends Bhakti Yoga, a yoga of pure devotion to Lord Krishna. It is
the only way to reach the supreme Godhead in this age of Kali Yuga.
Other ways are futile. His Divine Grace said: This simplest method of
meditation is recommended for this age. By practical experience also, one
can perceive that by chanting this maha-mantra, one can feel a
transcendental ecstasy coming through from the spiritual stratum. The
transcendental vibration established by chanting of Hare Krishna, Hare
Krishna, Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare/ Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama,
Rama, Hare, Hare is the sublime method for reviving our transcendental
consciousness. We are reminded that we are part of the supreme
Godhead Krishna by chanting this mantra.‟

164
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

I was surprised at his answer. It was quite different to what I had read
by Paramahansa Yogananda and what I had experienced in Reiki under
the guidance of Anand.
„But what is Kriya Yoga? There are people that are practicing that and
getting results. I was doing Reiki, and was developing using that
meditation,‟ I replied.
„Those methods are not suitable for this age. You will have found that
you were not progressing as much as you had hoped. Bhakti Yoga is the
only way for this age. I see that you have been misled by people, who do
not understand fully this age of Kali Yuga. Please take and read this book,
it will answer many of your questions.‟ Swami Devananda Das opened a
draw of his desk and took out a book and gave it to me.
It was titled „The Science of Self-Realisation‟ written by His Divine
Grace Swami Prabhupada.
„Is this the Gita?‟ I asked.
„No, it is not the Gita but it is a series of explanations given by His
Divine Grace. I will also give you a copy of the Gita that is downstairs in
our bookshop.‟
„Thank you. I will read it and get back to you,‟ I replied.
Just then there was a sound like that of trumpets and the beating of
drums.
„The midday darshan has started. Come let us go downstairs,‟ said the
Swamaji.
Prem and I followed him downstairs into a large open courtyard, which
was full of hundreds of people. Many of them were chanting and smiling,
others were jostling for position. I saw that they were all trying to get to
the front. At the front were three shrines, two shaved priests were
standing in each shrine. One was beating a drum; the other was
rhythmically swaying a tray filled with small lit candles, made from
dipping cotton wool into clarified butter.
„Follow me,‟ said the Swamaji.
We followed the Swamaji; he went to the left of the crowd. There was a
pathway kept clear by the security guards. We were soon at the front of
the crowd, in front of the shrines. Swamaji got the attention of the priests
and pointed at us, we were soon blessed ahead of the others.
„Thank you Swamaji,‟ I said.
„Hare Krishna,‟ he replied.
Swami Devananda Das led us to the Govinda Restaurant, part of the
ISKCON complex.
„We have over 130 different vegetarian dishes. Each one is first offered
to Lord Krishna for his blessing. Please help yourself.‟
There was a tremendous variety and choice, with different curries,
pastas, salads and snacks. The food was very tasty. The restaurant was
open to the public, an all you can eat vegetarian buffet priced at Rs110.
165
 SECOND CHANCE

Swamaji didn‟t allow us to pay, and he also gave me a copy of the

Bhagavad Gita. We said good bye and left to return to Nariman Point.
„Did Swamaji answer your questions, Arjuna?‟ asked Prem.
„He did, but it raised more questions in my mind. I will have to read this
book, maybe it will make it clearer.‟
„Swamaji is a very learned man, despite his young age. I will take you
with me next week, and you can ask him some more questions.‟
„Thank you Prem. That is a very kind offer. I am glad that I came with
you. I have learnt something today.‟
Prem smiled and went to sleep. We had both eaten a lot, and I was also
feeling drowsy and went to sleep in the car.
I was disappointed in what I had heard from Swami Devananda Das,
but perhaps I had not understood what he was saying. I started to read
„The Science of Self Realization‟ by His Divine Grace Srila Prabhupada to
get an overview of the Bhagavad Gita. It was a well written book, a
compilation of commentaries by Swami Prabhupada and some transcripts
of his interviews with various journalists and people interested in finding
out more about ISKCON.
The first transcript was of an interview with Sandy Nixon, a freelance
reporter:

Ms Nixon: What is Krishna consciousness?

Srila Prabhupada (SP): ‗Krishna‘ means God. We are all intimately connected
with Him because He is our original Father. But we have forgotten this
connection. When we become interested in knowing, ―What is my connection with
God? What is the aim of life?‘ then we are called Krishna conscious.
Ms Nixon: How does Krishna consciousness develop in the practitioner?
SP: Krishna consciousness is already there in the core of everyone‘s heart. Now
your consciousness is covered with so much rubbish. You have to cleanse it, and
then – Krishna consciousness. Our consciousness is like water: water is by nature
clear and transparent, but sometimes it becomes muddy. If you filter out all the
mud, the water again becomes clear, returning to its original state. The process of
chanting the Hare Krishna maha-mantra - Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna,
Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare/ Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama, Rama, Hare,
Hare – revives the Krishna consciousness that we already have.
Ms Nixon: What is the difference between Krishna and Christ consciousness?
SP: Christ consciousness is also Krishna consciousness, but because at present
people do not follow the rules and regulations of Christianity – the commandments
of Jesus Christ – they do not come to the standard of God consciousness.
[SP: What is the meaning of the word Christ?
Father Emmanuel: Christ comes from the Greek word Christos, meaning ―the
anointed one‖
SP: Christos is the Greek version of the word Krishna „The Science of Self –
Realization‟. When an Indian person calls on Krishna, he often says ―Krishta‖.
166
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

Krishta is the Sanskrit word meaning ―attraction‖. So when we address God as

―Christ‖, ―Krishta‖ or ―Krishna‖, we indicate the same all-attractive Supreme
Personality of Godhead. When Jesus said, ―Our Father, who art in heaven,
sanctified by Thy name,‖ that name of God was ―Krishta‖ or ―Krishna‖.
―Christ‖ is another way of saying ―Krishta‖ and ―Krishta‖ is another way of
saying ―Krishna‖. Therefore whether you call God ―Christ‖, ―Krishta‖ or
―Krishna‖, ultimately you are addressing the same Supreme Personality of
Godhead.]
Ms Nixon: What is unique about Krishna consciousness?
SP: Primarily, religion means to know God and to love him. That is religion.
Nowadays, because of a lack of training, nobody knows God. People are satisfied,
simply going to church and praying, ‗O God, give us our daily bread.‘ In the
Srimad Bhagavatam this is called a cheating religion, because the aim is not to
know and love God but to gain some personal profit. If I profess to follow some
religion, but I do not know who God is or how to love Him, I am practicing a
cheating religion. As far as the Christian religion is concerned, ample opportunity
is given to understand God, but no one is taking it.
Not all paths lead to the same end. There are four classes of me – the Karmis, the
Jnanis, the Yogis and the Bhaktis – and each achieves a different goal. The
Karmis work for material profit. The Jnanis try to understand the world and
achieve salvation through understanding. The Yogis aim to acquire mystical,
spiritual power. But the Bhakti – the devotee – doesn‘t want anything for himself.
He simply wants to serve God out of love, just as a mother serves her child.
When you come to this stage of loving God that is perfection. Neither the Karmi,
the Jnani, not the Yogi can know God – only the Bhakti. As Krishna says in the
Bhagavad Gita (Chap 18, verse 55) ‗Only through the process of bhakti can one
understand God. Krishna never says one can understand Him by other processes.
No. Only through bhakti. If you are interested in knowing God and loving Him,
then you must accept the devotional process. No other process will help you.
Ms Nixon: Can the Vedas be taken symbolically as well as literally?
SP: No. They must be taken as they are, not symbolically. That is why we are
representing the Bhagavad Gita As It Is.
Ms Nixon: Could you explain the meaning of the Hare Krishna mantra?
SP: It is very simple. Hare mean, ―O energy of the Lord‖, and Krishna means,
―O Lord Krishna‖. Just as there are males and females in the material world,
similarly, God is the original male (pursa), and His energy (pakriti) is the original
female. So when we chant Hare Krishna, we are saying, ―O Lord Krishna, O
energy of Krishna, kindly engage me in Your service.‖
Ms Nixon: You have said that you are not God, and yet it appears to me as an
outside, that your devotees treat you as if you were God.
SP: Yes, that is their duty. Because the spiritual master is executing God‘s order,
he should be respected as much as God. Even if an ordinary policeman comes, you
have to respect him because he is a government man. But that does not mean he is
the government. The scriptures say ‗The spiritual master is to be honoured as much
167
 SECOND CHANCE

as the Supreme Lord because he is the most confidential servitor of the Lord. This
is acknowledged in all revealed scriptures and followed by all authorities.‘
Ms Nixon: I also wonder about the many beautiful material things the devotees
bring you. For instance, you left the airport in a beautiful fancy car.
SP: That teaches disciples how to regard the spiritual master as good as God. If
you respect the spiritual master as much as God, then you must offer him the same
facilities you would offer to God. God travels in a golden car. If the disciples offer
the spiritual master an ordinary motorcar, it would not be sufficient because the
spiritual master has to be treated like God. If God comes to your home, will you
bring him an ordinary motor car – or will you arrange for a golden car?

Srila Prabhupada explained his understanding of the Bhagavad Gita to

another reporter Mike Robinson.

Mike Robinson: What is the philosophy of the Hare Krishna movement?

SP: One must first understand that he is a soul or something other than his body.
Just see: the body is changing, as we grow old, but the occupier of the body, the soul,
is remaining the same. So we should logically conclude that when our present body
dies, we get another body. This is called transmigration of the soul. The Bhagavad
Gita states (Chap 2, verse 20) ―For the soul, there is never birth or death. Nor,
having once been, does he ever cease to be. He is unborn, eternal, ever-existing,
undying and primeval. He is not slain when the body is slain.‖
Mike Robinson: If the soul is undying, does everybody‘s soul go to be with God
when they die?
SP: Not necessarily. If he qualifies to go back to Godhead, then he can go.
Otherwise he gets another material body; there are 8,400,000 different bodily
forms. According to his desires and karma, the law of nature, he gets a new body,
according to your work. You are simply getting new bodies. You should want to
know how to stop this business, so that you can remain in your original spiritual
body. That is Krishna consciousness. The Bhagavad Gita says (Chap 4, verse 9)
‗One who knows the transcendental nature of My appearance and activities does
not, upon leaving the body, take his birth again in this material world, but attains
my eternal abode, O Arjuna.‘ God is saying that ‗Anyone who understands Me is
free from birth and death.‖ But one cannot understand God by materialistic
speculation. That is not possible. One must first come to the spiritual platform.
Then he gets the intelligence required to understand God. And when he
understands God, he does not get any more material bodies. He goes back home to
Godhead. He lives eternally; no more change of body.
Mike Robinson: You have quoted several times from scriptures, where do they come
from?
SP: Our scriptures are coming from Vedic literature, which has existed from the
beginning of creation. The main difference between Krishna consciousness and the
other Eastern disciplines, being taught in the West, is that we are following the
original literature, and they are manufacturing their own literature.
168
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

Another Reporter: How can a person tell whether he has a genuine guru?
SP: The Mundaka Upanishad says that ―The genuine guru is well versed in
scriptures and Vedic knowledge, and he is completely dependent on Brahman.‖
The real guru will not manufacture anything. Everything he says is in accordance
with the scriptures and the previous Acharyas (Gurus). He will not give you a
mantra and tell you that you will become God in six months. The guru never says,
―I am God‖, or ―I will make you God‖. The real guru says ―I am a servant of
God, and I will make you a servant of God, also‖.
Reporter: Do you think that your movement is the only way to know God?
SP: Yes, from the authorities and from God, Krishna. Krishna says in Bhagavad
Gita (Chap 18, verse 66) ‗Abandon all varieties of religion and just surrender
unto Me. I shall deliver you from all sinful reaction. Do not fear.‘

I finished reading the book; it had answered some questions, but had
raised many more. Srila Prabhupada had quoted the Bhagavad Gita many
times. Luckily Swami Devananda Das had given me a copy of the Gita,
after we had finished our lunch. For the first time I was able to cross
reference what Srila Prabhupada was saying and the Vedic scripture of
the Bhagavad Gita, admittedly it was his own translation. But even so it
was a way of checking what His Divine Grace was saying. I was
becoming weary of people after my experience with Hiremath, Sunil and
the oddness of Anand‟s behaviour. I had many questions for Swami
Devananda Das.
Sunday came quickly. Prem was true to his word, and we drove up to
Juhu again to meet with Swami Devananda Das. We went up to his office
and made ourselves comfortable.
„Hare Krishna. Did you read the book by His Divine Grace?” asked
Swami Devananda Das, looking at me with a large welcoming smile.
„Yes I read the book and I got a chance to read through the Bhagavad
Gita,‟ I replied.
„Excellent. You are true to your name sake, Arjuna. It was to Arjuna
that Lord Krishna first revealed the secrets of life, on the battlefield of
Kurukshetra over 5000 years ago. Now today I am very happy to be with
another Arjuna, a sincere seeker like the first Arjuna, and to answer his
questions. Do you have questions?‟ asked Swamaji.
„Yes I have many questions. There were many areas that I was confused
about, things that I did not understand,‟ I replied.
„Hare Krishna, excellent. Please ask your questions.‟
„I found the explanations of His Divine Grace very interesting and
straightforward to understand.‟
„Yes he was a very enlightened saint.‟
„But I am confused around the comment that you made last time we
met, that Bhakti yoga, worship is the only way. His Divine Grace also
made the same point. His Divine Grace went further to say that the other

169
 SECOND CHANCE

„gurus‟ from the East were cheaters and that other „gurus‟ were not true
gurus; that they manufactured their own literature, compared to
ISKCON which is strictly based on the Vedic scriptures.‟
„Yes Arjuna. That is what I was also trying to tell you. It is very true, in
this age of Kali Yuga, worship is the only way.‟
„But when I went through the Bhagavad Gita, I could not find the Hare
Krishna maha mantra that you told me about and which His Divine
Grace talked about. This mantra is not in the Bhagavad Gita. His Divine
Grace gave an explanation of what it meant, but he did not say where it
came from. From which Vedic scripture does it come from?‟ I asked.
Swamaji looked at me and smiled. He continued smiling for a while
before answering my question.
„The Hare Krishna maha mantra is a mantra of devotion to Lord
Krishna, as explained by His Divine Grace. It is simply an execution of
what Lord Krishna commanded Arjuna and for us to be devoted to Him.
In the Bhagavad Gita (Chap 19, verse 65) it says “Always think of Me,
become My devotee, worship Me and offer your homage unto Me. Thus
you will come to Me without fail. I promise you this because you are My
very dear friend.” This mantra is a symbolic representation of this
command from Lord Krishna,‟ replied Swamaji.
„But His Divine Grace told us that the Vedic literatures are to be taken
literally not symbolically,‟ I argued.
„Excellent, Arjuna, you have read the book well. The Hare Krishna
maha mantra is a literal interpretation. You are right that we should take
the scriptures literally, they are not allusions and symbols, but it is the
truth,‟ replied Swamaji.
„I am not sure that I understand.‟
„These transcendental mysteries take a life time of meditation and
worship to understand. His Divine Grace was a foremost Vedic scholar
with over fifty years of learning and devotion. It cannot be understood in
a matter of a week, my dear friend,‟ Swamaji smiled broadly.
„Yes you are right,‟ I replied
„Hare Krishna,‟ said Swamaji.
„I have one final question.‟
„Please.‟
„In his book Autobiography of Yogi, Paramahansa Yogananada quoted
Bhagavad Gita (chap 6, verse 46), which I looked up, and in the
translation by His Divine Grace it says:
„A yogi is greater than the ascetic, greater than the empiricist and greater
than the fruitive worker. Therefore, O Arjuna, in all circumstances be a
Yogi.‟”
Swamaji wanted to say something, but I continued.
„I then read the whole of chapter 6 in the Bhagavad Gita and this is
what it says about being a yogi:
170
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

―(verse 7,8) For one who has conquered the mind, the Supersoul is already
reached, for he has attained tranquillity. To such a man happiness and distress,
heat and cold, honour and dishonour are the same.
A person is said to be established in self-realisation and is called a yogi when he is
fully satisfied by virtue of acquired knowledge and realisation. Such a person is
situated in transcendence and is self controlled. He sees everything – whether they
are pebbles stones or gold – as the same. …
(verse 15) Thus practicing control of the body, mind and activities, the mystic
transcendentalist, his mind regulated, attains to the kingdom of God by cessation of
material existence.
(verse 20-23) In the stage of perfection called trance, or Samadhi, one‘s mind is
completely restrained from material mental activities by practice of yoga. This
perfection is characterised by one‘s ability to see the self by the pure mind and to
relish and rejoice in the self. In that joyous state, one is situated in boundless
transcendental happiness, realised through transcendental senses. Established thus,
one never departs from the truth, and upon gaining this he thinks there is no
greater gain. Being situated in such a position, one is never shaken, even in the
midst of greatest difficulty. This indeed is actual freedom from all miseries arising
from material contact.
(verse 28) Thus the self controlled yogi, constantly engaged in yoga practice, becomes
free from all material contamination and achieves the highest stage of perfect
happiness in transcendental loving service to the Lord.‖
My understanding, from literally reading the Bhagavad Gita, is that it is
possible to reach the Lord through yoga, as described by Parahamansa
Yoganananda. Not only that, but one can „achieve the highest stage of
perfect happiness in transcendental loving service to the Lord‟. If that is
the case then why did His Divine Grace say in his interview with Ms
Nixon that the path of Yogic meditation does not lead to the Lord, and
that it is a different path? Isn‟t His Divine Grace contradicting what is
written in the Bhagavad Gita?
Swamaji was grinning more and more. Prem on the other hand was
looking more and more interested in the conversation.
Swamaji replied, „My dear Arjuna. What is a contradiction? What is
truth and what is a lie? The words of the Lord Krishna require great
wisdom and understanding. Understanding which His Divine Grace had
acquired through years of devotion. We cannot hope to have the same
level of understanding. The Bhagavad Gita clearly states in chapter 18,
verse 55 „One can understand Me as I am, as the Supreme Personality of
Godhead, only by devotional service. And when one is in full
consciousness of Me by such devotion, he can enter the kingdom of
God.‟ There it is clearly stated that in this age of Kala Yuga that bhakti,
devotional service is the only way.‟
171
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes that is true. But you will know that, Lord Krishna tells Arjuna, that
yogic meditation is the most superior way to reach self-realisation in
chapter 6. However, Arjuna says that he does not have the ability to do
this kind of Dhyana, mental, yoga, so in response Lord Krishna gives him
an alternative which is bhakti. From taking the scripture literally, I
conclude that bhakti is a second choice, only because Arjuna says that he
cannot practice this dhyana yoga. This is written in Chapter 6 verses 33
and 34, as is Lord Krishna‟s response in verses 35 and 36:
33: ―Arjuna said: O Madhusudhana, the system of yoga which You have
summarised appears impractical and unendurable to me, for the mind is restless
and unsteady.
34: The mind is restless, turbulent, obstinate and very strong, O Krishna, and to
subdue it, I think, is more difficult than controlling the wind.
35: Lord Shri Krishna said: O mighty-armed son of Kunti, it is undoubtedly very
difficult to curb the restless mind, but it is possible by suitable practice and by
detachment.
36: For one whose mind is unbridled, self-realisation is difficult work. But he
whose mind is controlled and who strives by appropriate means is assured of
success. That is My opinion.‖
My understanding is that the battle of Kurukshetra started Kali Yuga, so
Lord Krishna knew that he was speaking to people in Kali Yuga. If that is
correct, then Lord Krishna is literally saying that for some people dhyana
yoga, as described by yogis such as Parahamansa Yogananada, is possible.
I would also agree that, perhaps, for the majority it is not suitable and
that only bhakti, worship is recommended. But this is not what His
Divine Grace says, in his response to Ms Nixon, he dismisses chapter 6
entirely. This is my understanding.‟
Swami Devananda Das, smiled broadly, and shuffled uneasily in his
chair, he looked at Prem who had just shifted his attention from me to
Swamaji. At that moment, a loud horn sounded together with the sound
of beating drums, signifying the start of the noonday darshan.
„The Gita is very complex to understand. Lord Krishna is God, and
God is beyond our understanding. Only through bhakti can we ultimately
realise the supreme. Come the time to worship Lord Krishna has arrived.
Let us go and pay our devotions to Lord Krishna. Come my dear friend
Arjuna; let us be devotees to Lord Krishna.‟
Swamaji got up from his chair. We followed him down to the courtyard,
into the large teeming crowd, and went straight to the shrines, to receive
our blessings.
We had lunch together. Swamaji spent his time talking to Prem and the
work that was going on at the temple in Juhu. Our conversation on the
Bhagavad Gita had been terminated.
172
 THE BHAGAVAD GITA AS IT IS

In the car, on the way back to Nariman Point, Prem commented:

„Those were good questions Arjuna. Did you receive a satisfactory
answer?‟
„I am not sure whether I received any answers. This is a very complex
subject, and I have much to understand. Swamaji is correct in saying that
one cannot understand something in one week, to the same extent as
someone who has been intently studying the subject for fifty years,‟ I
replied.
„That is true,‟ said Prem, nodding in agreement.
The rest of the ride back home was spent in silence.
The next Sunday morning I saw Prem getting into his car.
„Are you going to Juhu?‟ I asked.
„No I am going to the club,‟ replied Prem.
I didn‟t go back to the ISKCON temple in Juhu for the rest of the time
that I was in Mumbai. Nor did Prem offer to take me there again.
My search for a guru continued.

173
SECOND CHANCE

174
 12 SEARCH FOR A GURU

My quest for a Guru continued. There was no shortage of Gurus to

choose from. It seemed that virtually everyone that I met had a Guru,
who had either given some special gifts, or had helped them in their
business, or relationships, or health, or in all of these areas. These Gurus
were scattered across India. Some were alive, others had left their earthly
bodies, but their spirit was still there ministering to their followers. Some
had millions of followers, others a few hundred. I went to the shrines of
those, whose followers were the most enthusiastic.
The first of these was suggested to me by the estate agent, realtor that
had shown me the apartment at NCPA, Nariman Point. This is how it
came about. The realtor‟s name was Kaushik. One afternoon, while we
were sorting out the paper work for the apartment, I was talking to him
generally, trying to find out more about him.
„So Kaushik how is business?‟ I asked.
„Sir, it is very fine. I am very blessed,‟ replied Kaushik.
„Blessed?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir. I am very blessed. My business is doing very well. I am happy
at home and have a lovely, healthy baby boy.‟
„I am happy for you. Is there something special that you are doing that
has resulted in these blessings?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir. Every month I go and visit the shrine of my guru,‟ replied
Kaushik.
„Which guru is that?‟
„It is Shirdi Sai Baba. It is a very powerful place. You and Madam will
also be blessed if you go there.‟
„I am sorry I do not know much about Shirdi Sai Baba.‟
„Sir you do not know of Shirdi Sai Baba?‟
„No, Kaushik, I do not know.‟
175
 SECOND CHANCE

„He is a great Saint, who had many spiritual powers. Sai is a Persian
word for saint and Baba means „divine father‟. Nobody knows when he
was born, or where he was born, but one day he turned up in a place
called Shirdi, where he spent the rest of his life. He left his earthly body
in 1918. But, you can get his blessing by going to the shrine, which is
built around the tree where Shiridi Baba used to meditate. I am going
next week. I can take you with me. You will be very blessed Sir.‟
„Where is this place?‟ I asked.
„It is Shirdi, between Nasik and Aurangabad, about 300km from here.
We can leave in the morning, get there in the evening, and get up early
for the morning puja, when they wash the statues and say the prayers.
Then we can come back, arriving here late in the evening,‟ said Kaushik,
enthusiastically.
„Where will we stay?‟ I asked.
„Sir, don‟t worry. I will arrange everything. There is a very nice hotel,
the Holiday Inn. It is very close to the temple. Sir, you will be blessed, in
business and in family affairs. There is a lot of power in that place.
Whatever you ask for, at that morning puja, Shirdi Baba will grant it to
you. Sir, Shirdi Baba, has always answered my prayers. I know that you
have a good heart. Shirdi Baba will answer your prayers as well. I
guarantee it.‟
„It‟s a long way to go, Kaushik.‟
„Yes Sir, I will drive you there. We will have a good time, you can rest,
and I will drive.‟
„When are you planning to go?‟ I asked.
„Next Saturday, I am going. We will be back on Sunday evening.‟ replied
Kaushik.
„Let me have a think about it.‟
There was something about the enthusiasm with which Kaushik talked
about Shirdi Baba that made me decide to go with him to Shirdi. It was a
very long drive, taking us almost seven hours. The main highway,
National Highway 3, was full of traffic. The smaller roads had less traffic,
but were full of pot holes. I was quite tired by the time we got to Shirdi,
even though I had not done any of the driving, but had slept for most of
the way.
Shirdi was a small town, with a population of less than 20,000, very
small by Indian standards. But there were many hotels. The nicest one
was the Holiday Inn. Kaushik had made a reservation there for me,
although he chose to stay at one of the cheaper hotels. He was
accustomed to sleeping without air conditioning and the other „frills‟ that
I had got used to.
„Sir, I will make arrangements for us, for tomorrow morning,‟ said
Kaushik, as he left me in the Holiday Inn, heading for his own hotel.
„What arrangements?‟ I asked.
176
 SEARCH FOR A GURU

„I have some connections. We can get into the VIP entrance, so that we
can sit right in front of the shrine. There the power and vibrations of
Shirdi Baba are the strongest. There will be a very long queue to get in.
Sir, we will have to be at the shrine at 4:30 am. I will come here at 4:15,
so we can go to the puja, which starts at dawn and finishes by 7am. Then
you can come back to the hotel, have breakfast, and freshen up before
leaving for Mumbai.‟
„Sounds very hectic.‟
„Yes Sir, but it will be worth it.‟
„Okay, I‟ll see you at 4:15 in the morning. I better get to bed early. Is the
shrine close by?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir, we can go and see it now. It is on the way to my hotel,‟ replied
Kaushik.
I followed Kaushik out of the hotel. Within a few minutes we were in
the heart of Shirdi. There were hundreds of people coming towards us, in
front of us and around us.
„Where are all these people going?‟ I asked Kaushik.
„They are going for the evening puja. It is not as good as the morning
darshan.‟
We walked along with the crowd and were soon surrounded by people
coming up trying to sell flower garlands. We walked past over fifty stalls,
each stall selling string, flowers, incense, photographs, coconuts, all of
which were needed to give a prayer offering to Shirdi Baba.
„Sir, do not buy from them, I have got all that we need to have.‟
The shop owners shouted at me, trying to get my attention.
„Sir, Rs500 for puja materials.‟ We went a little bit further and another
shop owner shouted Rs400, the closer we got to the shrine, the cheaper it
got. Young boys and old ladies thronged around us trying to sell us a
garland.
„Sir, do not buy anything,‟ reiterated Kaushik.
When we got to the shrine, there were over a thousand people gathered
around waiting to get in for the puja.
„Is it always like this?‟ I asked.
„Yes Sir, it is always like this on a weekend. On special festival days,
more than ten thousand people come,‟ replied Kaushik.
I did some mental arithmetic; there was an enormous amount of money
that was exchanging hands. Someone told me later that the vast majority
of puja items are re-cycled. One particular garland may have been sold
five times over, before it is no longer any use. This partly explained why
the prices were dropping. The young boys and the old ladies were the
ones involved in the secondary market.
„This is the tree, where Shirdi Baba used to meditate,‟ said Kaushik
pointing at a large banyan tree that was fenced off.

177
 SECOND CHANCE

Opposite to the tree was a book shop. I went in and got a couple of
books on Shirdi Baba.
Our walk around the shrine complex was interrupted by the sound of
many bells ringing.
„That is the bell, to allow people to come in for the evening puja,‟ said
Kaushik, in anticipation of my question.
„I guess I better get back to the hotel and go to sleep.‟
„Sir I will come with you.‟
„It‟s okay, I‟ll be able to find my way back,‟ I replied.
It was a lot busier and more commercial than I had anticipated. Luckily
the journey had been very tiring, and I had no problems in getting to
sleep.
Kaushik was there on time at 4:15am, precisely. He had arranged for a
special VIP entrance. We still had the queue but for not as long as the
others who had to come in by the normal entrance. Kaushik told me that
some of them had been there since midnight to ensure that they could be
near the front, close to the shrine.
At 5:15 we were allowed to go in, ushered by the priests of the shrine.
The priests all had their heads shaved, and wore a single white piece of
cloth that was wrapped around each thigh, the ends of which were tucked
around their waist. They were bare chested, apart from a piece of string,
each of them had three horizontal white marks across their foreheads,
and some had additional markings on their arms. They were all busy
directing people into their places, it was a very serious affair, and none of
them were smiling.
We sat down, very close to the shrine. In front of us was a large statue
of a bearded old man sitting cross-legged. On either side were other
smaller statues. Behind us and to the side of us were hundreds of people,
all seated on the floor; silently and attentively looking at the activities of
the priests who were standing next to the statue. Suddenly, the whole
shrine was filled with the cacophony of hundreds of hand bells, rung by
the priests, which was quickly followed by a number of blasts on a large
horn. The puja had started.
The horn blast was followed by chanting. My body was swaying in
rhythm with the chanting. The priests came and poured water over the
statue, cleaning it. Kaushik whispered that they were bathing the statue,
this was done every morning. The priests thoroughly cleaned the statue.
Then they took some pouches of milk from some of the devotees that
were sitting close to the statue, opened them and poured the milk over
the statue. Which explained why so many people were buying and
carrying around milk pouches. The rest of the milk pouches were
collected and put to one side; no doubt for recycling into the second
hand market.

178
 SEARCH FOR A GURU

Some other priests came and again washed the milk of the statue with
more water. The chanting had changed into another chant, which I could
not make out, but it was soothing and relaxing. I closed my eyes and I
half sensed some divine presence. I wondered if it was the spirit of Shirdi
Baba. I mentally requested Shirdi Baba to grant me and Rita, peace,
happiness and prosperity. The chanting continued. I opened my eyes, and
saw the priests collecting flowers from the devotees. They plucked the
petals from the flower and threw them over the statue. Hundreds of
devotees had bought flowers, which were all collected and put to one side
together with the unused milk.
There was more bell ringing and another priest came forward with a
brass receptacle that had many wicks of cotton dipped in ghee (clarified
butter) that were all lit. It reminded me of a large flaming birthday cake
with forty lit candles. The priest waved the flames in a circular arc in
front of the statue several times. The whole process was similar to what I
had seen at the ISKON temple in Juhu, at the midday darshan. There
were two differences: the statue was of Shirdi Baba and not of Krishna
and the difference was that the people were seated, there was less pushing
and shoving to get to the front for the blessing. The priest took the lit
tray through the seated congregation. As the lit tray went past a devotee
they would place their hands in front of them, palm facing down, and
then sweep their hands over the flames and onto their face, thereby
gathering the heat of the flames onto their faces. Each devotee
performed this act with reverence, some were smiling, and others had an
intent look of concentration on their faces.
The ceremony lasted just over forty minutes, but the whole process of
sitting down and leaving took over an hour and half.
After the ceremony was over I asked Kaushik to come to the hotel and
join me for breakfast. He politely declined my offer and went straight
back to his room. We agreed that we would meet in the hotel lobby at
9:30, to head back to Mumbai.
It had just gone past 7am when I entered the hotel restaurant to have
my breakfast. The energy and sound of the morning puja was gently
fading away from my body. By the time I had finished breakfast all of the
energy had gone completely and I felt quite exhausted. I went up and lay
down on the bed to rest and was soon fast asleep.
The telephone ringing in the room woke me up. It took me a while to
locate the phone and pick it up.
„Hello,‟ I said.
„Sir, it is Kaushik here. I am ready and am waiting downstairs.‟
I looked at my watch it was coming up to 10am. Kaushik must have
been patiently waiting for over thirty minutes before deciding to call me.
„I‟m really sorry Kaushik, I dozed off. I will be down in fifteen minutes.‟
„No problem Sir, I am waiting.‟
179
 SECOND CHANCE

I hurriedly got ready and went downstairs to meet Kaushik, who was
patiently waiting with a big smile on his face. He didn‟t look tired at all,
despite the early rising to attend the puja.
„I‟m sorry, I went to sleep. I found it very tiring to get up so early in the
morning. Are you not feeling tired, Kaushik?‟ I asked.
„No Sir. I am very fresh. I get up every morning at five o‟clock and do
puja. I am quite used to it.‟
He did look very fresh and invigorated. I looked at my reflection in the
mirror, I looked quite the opposite. I fell asleep, once again, as soon as
we got in the car.
It had been an interesting experience. I had felt some calm and peace
whilst at Shirdi attending the puja. However, it was not any different to
what I had felt during my time at the ISKCON temple in Juhu. I was still
looking for a guru that would teach me the way of dhanya yoga of the
Bhagavad Gita or the Kriya Yoga of Yoganananda Parahamansa,
something that would speed up my spiritual progress. Visiting the shrine
of Sai Baba was another form of Bhakti (worship) Yoga, which seemed
too slow a process for development.
A short while later, I heard of another guru, called Sai Baba who
claimed to be the re-incarnation of Shirdi Sai Baba. Whereas thousands
visited Shirdi, tens of thousands visited Phootaphathi in Andhra Pradesh,
where Sai Baba had his ashram. Many people claimed to have had visions
of him in their dreams and fragrant oil would spontaneously ooze from
his photographs. Some people had claimed that he could materialise
watches and gold chains, and that he had significant spiritual power. He
was getting old now, so he did not travel very much.
I made arrangements to go to Phootapathi. The closest airport was
Bangalore, from where I hired a car to drive to Phootapathi, located at
the southern end Andhra Pradesh, close to the border of Karnataka. The
journey took over four hours, winding through scenic countryside. We
had gone for miles and miles, only passing the occasional small village,
when suddenly we drove past a full length landing strip. The driver told
me that it had been specially constructed so that a Boeing 747 could land
to make it easier for overseas devotees to come and see Sai Baba. This
was quite astonishing, as even Ahmedabad, the largest city in Gujarat
with a population approach six million, had only recently extended its
runway to accommodate a 747. Yet here in middle of rural Andhra
Pradesh was a brand new airstrip.
We went past the airport and entered the town. We passed several large,
modern looking buildings that were over five storeys high and over five
hundred feet in length. One was a primary school, another a junior
school, then a college, and a university. We went past a hospital that was
supposed to be on par with the finest in America. The driver told me that
180
 SEARCH FOR A GURU

all of these buildings had been projects of Sai Baba, which had been
funded by generous donations from his devotees living in Europe and
America. It was very impressive. For the first time I had come across a
guru who had spent considerable effort and energy in building schools,
universities and hospitals, as well as an ashram.
I later read that when Sai Baba first came to this place it was almost
deserted. The quality of the land was not so good and people had become
afraid to live there. Over several decades Sai Baba had completely
transformed the place. The roads were well looked after, there were
pavements and there was very little litter to be seen. It was so unusual to
see a place like this. It was another world compared to the surrounding
villages in Andhra Pradesh (a state with a population of about 70 million
of which 70% lived in villages).
We entered the ashram. On one side was a huge white marble building
that was the VIP quarters and where Sai Baba stayed. Next to it was a
large rectangular building, open on the sides but with a roof on top. This
was the place where people would sit to see Sai Baba. Within the Ashram
there were many, many buildings. Most of them were dormitories, some
for married couples, others for single ladies, and others for single men.
Many had come from Europe and US to spend weeks, months, or years,
in the Ashram in the presence of this guru. I saw many of Anglo-Saxon
origin as well as Indians. This was all quite extraordinary.
Sai Baba usually came to spend time and walk with the devotees twice a
day. This occurred during the time of devotion. The next scheduled
devotion was several hours away. The driver told me to start to queue as
soon as possible so as to get a chance to be close to Sai Baba. I found out
where to queue, and was surprised to see several hundred people were
there already.
Two hours later we were allowed to go into the main seating area. It
was very large accommodating over 15,000 people. I had to go through a
metal detector, and a search, which seemed a little unusual. I later learned
that there had been an assassination attempt on Sai Baba several years
earlier. The assailants, a gang of four locals, had all been killed by Sai
Baba‟s bodyguards. There were a lot of rumours around, about the
reasons for this attempt and a great deal of subsequent controversy
surrounding Sai Baba.
I reasoned that there is always a lot of controversy around prominent
figures.
The whole process of queuing and being seated was very well organised.
There were over ten thousand devotees all sitting down waiting to see Sai
Baba. The music started and the people started chanting and singing. A
little later, an old man, no taller than five foot, appeared wearing a long
saffron coloured robe. He had long frizzy black hair that stuck out. He
walked slowly among the crowds, smiling and waving. Occasionally he
181
 SECOND CHANCE

would bend down and talk to one of the devotees. I craned my neck to
see him, the helpers who had seated us down, made sure that nobody
stood up. The closest that Sai Baba came to me was a hundred feet.
I had bought several books written by him. He claimed to be the re-
incarnation of Shridi Baba and an avatar (an incarnation) of Lord Shiva,
one of the gods of the Hindu trinity, representing god as the destroyer;
the other two gods in the Trinity being Brahama, god as the creator, and
Vishnu, god as the preserver. I had expected to feel something powerful,
being in the presence of a living god, as claimed by Sai Baba. But I did
not feel anything. Perhaps I was not ready.
I had expected to see a college, or some kind of educational
establishment, where I could learn how to become one with the supreme
cosmic spirit. I bought some of Sai Baba‟s many books on wisdom. In
those Sai Baba advocated that Lord Shiva be worshipped, and suggested
that they focus on him, to help in the meditation. It was yet another form
of bhakti worship. I had expected something more, but was disappointed
once again, and returned back to Mumbai.
Over the next couple of months I visited many other shrines around
the country. It seemed that there were many gurus advocating the
worship of Lord Shiva, who would destroy the karmic links with the
material world, which would then allow you to be united with the
supreme cosmic spirit. Some would say to focus on Shiva, others would
be strongly advocating worshipping, through which one could access
Lord Shiva. I guess it was the easiest way for most people, to focus on a
person, rather than on focus something more abstract. But it was not the
dhyana or kriya yoga that I was looking for.
I wondered whether I was ever going to find a guru. Rajiv, one of my
cousins who had heard that I was in Mumbai, sent me an email about his
guru, Swami Muktananda Paramahansa. He had an ashram in Ganeshpuri
some fifty miles north-east of Mumbai. Rajiv also sent me several books
by Swami Muktananda: „Meditate‟, „Where are you going?‟ and his
autobiography, entitled „Play of Consciousness‟.
I began to read the „Meditate‟ book which had a brief biography of
Muktananda. I read that Swami Muktananda was born in 1908 in
Mangalore, Karnataka. At the age of fifteen, he had begun his quest to
find a spiritual guru. He spent twenty-five years travelling around India,
and had met more than sixty great saints! (My search of ten months
seemed to be quite pathetic by comparison.) Eventually, Swami
Muktananda met another saint called Bhagawan Nityananda who had set
up an ashram in Ganeshpuri. There, in Ganeshpuri, on 15th August 1947,
Bhagawan Nityananda gave Swami Muktananda, Shaktipat. For the next
nine years, Swami Muktananda went through a number of extraordinary
transcendental experiences that eventually made him a self-realised yogi,
in 1956. In 1970, Swami Muktananda started to travel to America,
182
 SEARCH FOR A GURU

spreading his message of yoga to the west. On October 2, 1982, Swami

Muktananda left his earthly body.
I wondered what this Shaktipat could be.
My cousin, Rajiv, had recommended that I read all of the books. I
moved on to „Where are you going?‟, and as I read the chapter on „The
Power of the Self‟, I felt that I was within reach of what I was looking
for. Swami Muktananda had written:
‗It is said that the Self is attained through knowledge, yet the knowledge that
reveals the Self is not the worldly knowledge we acquire from books or in school. It
is the inner understanding of unity, the realisation that we and the Absolute are
one and the same. How do we obtain this knowledge? It comes to us spontaneously
when our inner energy awakens and unfolds within us.
This inner energy is known as Kundalini, and it lives within every human being.
Kundalini has two aspects: One carries out our worldly functions, while the other
leads us to the highest Truth. The outgoing, worldly aspect of Kundalini is
functioning perfectly, but its inner spiritual aspect is dormant. That is why we are
not aware of it.
The Kundalini is spoken of in nearly every tradition, though it is know by different
names. In China, it is called Chi. In Japan, it is known as Ki. The scriptures of
Christianity call it the Holy Spirit – but what is Kundalini? Kundalini is Shakti,
cosmic energy, whom the sages of India worship as the mother of the Universe.
Shakti is the dynamic aspect of the formless, attributeless, Absolute. She is God‘s
creative power, the force that manifests this universe of forms, the supreme power
through which everything comes into existence.
Another name for Kundalini is Chiti, universal consciousness. Chiti is supremely
free. No one compels Her to create this universe; She does it on Her own.
Moreover, She creates the universe out of Her own being, using no outside
materials. Chiti becomes every particle of this material world, manifesting as all the
forms and shapes that we see around us. She pervades everything in the visible and
invisible universe, and carries out infinite functions. Yet even though She has
become the universe, She never loses Her power or Her purity.
This mighty power is the power of our own Self. The name Shakti that creates the
external universe also pervades the human body from head to toe, and in this form
She is known as Kundalini. Kundalini is the vital energy that makes everything in
the body work. She enables us to see through the eyes, hear through the ears,
experience touch through the skin. The power of Kundalini makes the heart beat,
the blood flow, the breath come in and go out of the body. This is the external
aspect of Kundalini, which supports our lives. Although all-pervading, She has a
specific seat in the muladhara chakra, at the base of the spine, from where She
controls and maintains our entire physiological system through its network of 720
million main and subsidiary nadis (channels of vital force, a spiritual version of the
human nervous and endocrine system).
183
 SECOND CHANCE

Just as this outer aspect of Kundalini enables us to function in the external world,
the inner aspect of Kundalini enables the spiritual process to go on within us. Only
when the inner Kundalini is awakened does our spiritual journey truly begin.
Unless Kundalini Shakti awakens and unfolds, no matter how many techniques
we practice, no matter how many scriptures we study, we will never realise our
identity with inner Self.
In our present state, our awareness flows outward. Because of the limitations of the
mind and sense, we think of ourselves as the body and identify with the experience
of our senses. We do not know the all-pervasiveness of Consciousness, nor do we
know our own divinity, but once Kundalini is awakened it begins to work within
us, our mind and our senses turn inward, and we became aware of our true nature.
When one acquires the strength of the Kundalini, one is able to assimilate the
entire universe into oneself. One no longer remains a limited, bound creature; one
achieves total union with God.‘
After reading this description of Kundalini, things started to fall into
place. The Kriya Yoga that Yogananda Parahamansa had talked about
was concerned with awakening the Kundalini. I remembered chanting the
sound „lum‟ and feeling something being stimulated at the base of my
spine, and the conversation that I had about the Kundalini with Anand.
He had told me not to stimulate the Kundalini. Here was Swami
Muktananda, advising that this was the only thing to do. I read on,
wandering how to activate this Kundalini, it seemed to be a short cut to
self-realisation, a way of being one with the Supreme Cosmic
Spirit/consciousness.
Swami Muktananda wrote about how to awaken the Kundalini:
‗There are several ways in which Kundalini can be awakened: She can be aroused
through intense yogic practices such as physical exercises, breathing techniques, and
mantra repetition, or She can be awakened through chanting and intense love for
God. Occasionally, one experiences a spontaneous awakening as a result of the
practices one performed in past lifetimes. However, the safest and surest means of
awakening the Kundalini is Shaktipat, the process by which a Siddha Guru (a
perfect human being who has attained the state of unity-awareness, who experiences
himself as all pervasive, and who has achieved mastery over his senses and their
objects) transmits his own fully unfolded Shakti directly into a disciple, activating
the dormant Kundalini and setting it into full operation.
Shaktipat is the secret initiation of the greatest sages and it has been passed on
from Guru to disciple since primordial times. It is not a monopoly of the Indian
tradition. Great beings of every religious tradition had their own inner energy
awakened and could awaken it in others; some spoke of it specifically, while others
did not. If Jesus moved his hand over someone, that person would be transformed
and great love and happiness would arise in him. That was nothing else but
Shaktipat. Saint Francis also had this power and it was through Shaktipat that
184
 SEARCH FOR A GURU

Ramakrishna Paramahansa gave his disciple Swami Vivekananda an

instantaneous experience of the Absolute.
The Guru can transmit Shakti to a seeker in four ways: One is by touch. Through
the grace of his own Guru and through intense practice, a true Guru has completely
unfolded his Kundalini energy, so that it fills every pore and blood cell of his body.
Shakti continually flows from him and passes into whomever he touches.
In the second method of initiation, the Guru transmits his energy into the disciples
through a word, a mantra. The mantra that he gives is the one he received from his
own Guru, which is then repeated for a long time during the course of his sadhan
(spiritual development). He has fully realised its power, and in this way has
charged it with the living force of Consciousness. If the disciple repeats the Guru‘s
mantra regularly and with faith, the Kundalini is awakened through its power.
However, if the disciple is highly qualified, it is enough for the Guru simply to
whisper the mantra in his ear and the Kundalini will be activated.
The third method of initiation takes place though the Guru‘s look. When my own
Guru initiated me in this manner, I experienced his energy entering me in the form
of a ray of light passing from his eyes into mine. The gaze of such a Guru is always
focussed on the Self within, even when he appears to be looking outward. Therefore
his look can easily transmit that power of Consciousness.
In the fourth method of initiation, the Guru transmits his Shakti into the disciple
through a thought.‘
This seemed to be the secret that I was looking for. I needed to find a
Guru that could impart this to me. I carried on reading. Swami
Muktananda described what happened after the Kundalini has been
activated.
‗The process that begins once the Kundalini is activated by a Siddha Guru is
known as Siddha Yoga (the perfect yoga) or Maha Yoga (the great yoga). Siddha
Yoga is the path of the perfect Masters, the means by which all the great saints and
sages attained perfection. The lineage of these Siddha Masters has existed since the
beginning of creation, and its power has been handed down from Guru to disciple
in an unbroken lineage.
Siddha Yoga is completely self propelled. Like a machine that operates
automatically once it has been started, the process of Siddha Yoga continues
without pause once it has been set in motion. After the Shakti is activated, yoga
happens spontaneously within. One does not have to make an effort to practise
yoga; it goes on all the time during the course of one‘s daily activities. Whether one
is working in an office or factory, carrying out one‘s business, or taking care of
one‘s children, the Shakti keeps unfolding within. That is why, once the Kundalini
has been awakened, a seeker does not have to perform strenuous spiritual practices.
The Shakti Herself gives every individual the experiences that are necessary for
him.
185
 SECOND CHANCE

All the classical yogas take place spontaneously in a seeker whose Kundalini is
awakened. For this reason, it is said that Siddha Yoga encompasses all other
yogas. For example, yogic postures, locks, and breathing techniques may occur
spontaneously during meditation; sometimes the body may shake and sway. All of
these movements are known as Kriyas, are manifestations of Hatha Yoga. They
take place in order to purify all the channels in the body, because unless these
channels are clear, the Shakti cannot work with full force.
The specific postures and movements that occur in an individual are precisely the
ones he needs for the purification of his system. This is one of the things that makes
Siddha Yoga so significant. When we practice Hatha Yoga on our own, we often
do not know which exercises our body actually needs, and so we may practise
postures that are unnecessary or even harmful to us; but when Hatha Yoga occurs
spontaneously through the action of the Kundalini, we automatically perform
whatever postures are appropriate for us.
Just as Hatha Yoga occurs after the Kundalini is awakened, other yogas take
place spontaneously as we need them; Love wells up within, as in Bhakti Yoga;
knowledge of the Self begins to arise on its own, as in Dhyana Yoga; we start to
work selflessly in the world, as in Karma Yoga. Addictions disappear, and we
begin to develop positive qualities such as patience, self-control, discipline, and
compassion. We no longer have to make a great effort to meditate; instead
meditation occurs spontaneously. In meditation we may see inner lights, or visions,
or hear inner sounds as in Laya Yoga. We develop great interest in chanting,
repeating the name of God, and reading the scriptures, as in Mantra Yoga.
Ultimately, when the Kundalini rises to the topmost spiritual centre, the sahasara
chakra (at the crown of the head, known as the thousand-petal lotus, it is the seat
of Shiva); we attain the Samadhi state, the state of equality-awareness.
As the Kundalini works within us, She automatically transforms our outer life as
well as our inner state. Our outlook changes and we begin to see everything around
us through new eyes. Relationships that may have seemed painful or dry become
joyful and filled with affection. We feel an ever-expanding love for our family and
friends, and gradually we start to see everyone around us as different forms of our
own self.‘
This was exactly what I was looking for. The Siddha Yoga encompassed
the Kriya Yoga of Yogananda Parahamansa, the Bhakti Yoga advocated
by ISKCON and Sai Baba, as well as, the Dhyana and Karma yogas
recommended by Lord Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita.
I made plans to visit Ganeshpuri, just under two hours‟ drive from
Nariman Point.

186
 13 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL
MEDITATION
I was intrigued by the Siddha Yoga. I read Swami
Muktananda‟s autobiography where he vividly described the
experiences he had, after receiving Shaktipat from his guru, and
during the Siddha Yoga process, as he experienced the different
Yogas: Kriya Yoga, Hatha Yoga, Dhyan Yoga and Bhakti Yoga.
The whole experience seemed quite scary and severe. I
wondered whether I would have a similar set of experiences,
after receiving the Shaktipat. I was confident that I would be
deemed worthy of receiving the Shaktipat, since I was a sincere
seeker and was ready to do whatever it took, to become self-
realised, one with the Supreme Cosmic Consciousness.
This is how Swami Muktananda described his experiences in
his autobiography, „The Play of Consciousness‟:
‗It was the morning of August 15, 1947. What an auspicious day! I was with
Gurudev Bhagwan Nityananda; he looked a little different than usual. At one
point he went into a corner and began to chant some secret mantras. He kept
coming and standing in front of me, making his familiar noise of endearment. An
hour passed like this.
Then he came near me and touched my body with his. My body was stunned with
this new wonder. I stood facing west. Gurudev, his body close to mine, stood
opposite. I opened my eyes, and saw Gurudev gazing directly at me, his eyes
merging with mine, in the shambhavi mudra (a state of spontaneous Samadhi in
which the eyes become focussed within although they remain open; the state of
supreme Shiva). My body became numb. I couldn‘t shut my eyes; I no longer had
the power to open or close them. The divine splendour of his eyes completely stilled
my own eyes. .. A ray of light was coming from his pupils, and going right inside
me. Its touch was searing, red hot, and its brilliance dazzled my eyes like a high
187
 SECOND CHANCE

powered bulb. As this ray flowed from Bhagawan Nityananda‘s eyes into my own,
the very hair on my body rose in wonder, awe, ecstasy, and fear. I went on repeating
this mantra Guru Om, watching the colours of this ray. It was an unbroken
stream of divine radiance. Sometimes it was the colour of molten gold, sometimes
saffron, sometimes a deep blue, more lustrous than a shining star. My body was
completely motionless. Then Gurudev moved a little and made a ‗hunh hunh‘
sound. I became conscious again. Then I got up, full of joy.
Gurudev sat down and, in his aphoristic way, started to speak: ―All mantras are
one.. All are Om. Om Namah Shivaya Om (Salutations to Lord Shiva,
known as the great redeeming mantra because it has the power to grant worldly
fulfilment, as well as spiritual realisation) should be Shivo‟ham (I am Shiva). It
should be repeated inside. Inside is much better than outside.‖
What a great and blessed day, what a sacred day it was ! I was completely
overcome with wonder, for I had never thought that such a thing could happen to
me.
By giving me the highly charged mantra Om Namah Shivaya, by showing me
the meaning of Om, and by uttering Shivo‟ham, he had brought me to an
awareness of oneness with Shiva. He had shown me the external practice of Om
Namah Shivaya, the great five letter mantra of salvation, and then spoken the
word Shivo‟ham, which the form of the inner ‗I am Shiva‘ within the heart. In
this way he gave me the undying message of Shiva, the immortal Lord. And by
saying ‗All is Om‘ he gave me the insight that all is one Self.
When Bhagawan Nitayananda said, ‗Shivo‘ham… this is how it should be,‖ this
great, supreme, and radiant mantra of Parashiva destroyed the innumerable sounds
that had been rising in the space within my heart since time without end, making
me wander through endless births and rebirths. He had destroyed the endless array
of impure feelings, the lust, the anger, the delusion arising from the notion of ‗I and
mine‘. He had transmitted into my heart that mighty mantra which is entirely
Shiva, filled with the light Consciousness, forever rising, luminous embodying the
truth of ‗I am perfect,‘ the transcendent word of Shakti. In the flames of his grace,
he had burned away the accumulated sins and karmic impressions of birth after
birth.
The next day, from early morning on, I was in a very strange state. I was seized by
restlessness. My whole body ached, and every pore felt as if it were pierced by
needles. I don‘t know why this suddenly happened. Where had my rapture, my
ecstasy, gone ?... My state of mind was just the opposite of what it had been
before… This anxiety grew in me and caused me great anguish. Just as I had felt
a surge of bliss before, now I was full of worry and arguing with myself….
Everything I saw around me terrified me… I cannot write the horrible thoughts
that filled my mind, but – its true- I had them…. I was assailed by all sorts of
perverse and defiling emotions. My body started to move and went on like this in a
confused sort of way. .. Often the breath that I took in would be held inside me. I
188
 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION

became more and more frightened…. My limbs and body got hotter and hotter. My
head felt heavy, and every pore in me began to ache…. I looked out and saw the
sugarcane field on fire. The flames were spreading rapidly. My fear increased every
second. I heard hordes of people screaming frightfully, as if it were the end of the
world. I looked out of the small window of my hut and saw strange creatures from
six to fifty feet tall, neither demons nor demigods, but human in form, dancing
naked, their mouths gaping open. Their screeching was horrible and apocalyptic. I
was completely conscious, but was watching my madness, which appeared to be
real… An army of ghosts and demons surrounded me…. I was quite aware that
everything I was seeing was unreal, but I was still surrounded by terror. …
Now I saw the whole earth covered with waters of universal dissolution. The world
had been destroyed, and I alone was left. Then, from over the water, a moonlike
sphere about four feet in diameter came floating in. It stopped in front of me. This
radiant, white ball struck against my eyes and then passed inside me. After a
while my eyes opened. I saw a very soft, red light shimmering all around. It was
flickering slightly, and from it sparks spread throughout the universe.
In meditation I would have all sorts of emotions and feelings and identifications.
Sometimes I would see the red light burning and would become completely one with
that. Sometimes I felt like a camel, sometimes like a bird. At times I was full of
joy; this would be followed by agitation, worry, foul thoughts, and then by worship
of the Guru. …
At this time, I understood nothing about the various experiences, such as the vision
of dissolution and the radiant light that had come to me on the first day. Only
afterward did I learn that they were all part of a process pertaining to Shaktipat.
People who have experienced it call it the awakening of the Kundalini…
Then a ruinous kind of meditation came to me, a sensual meditation, and a
meditation of desire. Now everything was directed outwards, towards sex, sex, sex.
I could think of nothing but sex ! My whole body boiled with lust, and I cannot
describe the agony of my sexual organ… When I shut my eyes, I saw, right in
front of me, a beautiful naked girl in the red light.. The naked woman pursued
and stood before me. She tortured me more and more. She was goading me for one
thing: she wanted to break my sacred vow of celibacy. .. She simply ruined my
meditation, disturbed my sex organ, and did everything she could to break my
vow… Another time she was beautifully adorned and extraordinarily attractive.
My mind became very restless. My sexual organ became agitated with great force. I
opened my eyes. I still saw her outside… Tearing my loincloth, my generative organ
dug forcibly into my navel, where it remained for some time… My mind was in a
terrible state. …
In Nagad I found a book in which I read that this was all part of the process of
Siddha Maha Yoga; it was the way to spiritual realisation. .. I stayed in Nagad
for some time, doing my sadhana. Now I understood that the onset of sexual desire
was connected with the process of becoming an urdhvareta, from which one gets the
189
 SECOND CHANCE

power to give Shaktipat. When the svadhishtana chakra is pierced, sexual desire
becomes very strong, but this happens so that the flow of sexual fluid may be turned
upward and the sadhaka‘s lust destroyed forever. The ecstasies I had had before
came back to me. The naked woman I had seen in meditation had caused so many
difficulties only because of my ignorance and confusion of mind. She was, in fact,
Mahadevi, the great goddess Kundalini. I begged forgiveness of the Mother and
recited a hymn in praise of Her. From then on, my meditation became very good.
The next day Mother Kundalini stood in the red aura again, but this time I could
see her supremely divine beauty. She was the lovely power of divine grace. As I
gazed at Her, I realised my good fortune and bowed to Her, whereupon she merged
into the red light. Now this Shakti became my Guru. It was only because my heart
was naked, lacking true knowledge, that she appeared naked to me. The feeling of
lust had arisen in me because I had not realised that She was the great Shakti
Kundalini. I had taken Her for a mortal, an ordinary woman of the world, and
my agony was a result of that ignorance. But now that was all over.‘
This whole process of Sadhana, from the time of receiving the
Shaktipat (15th August 1947) to realising that the woman was the
goddess Shakti Kundalini, and then ultimately becoming fully
realised took Swami Muktananda over nine years, reaching the
state of full self realisation in 1956.
On Saturday morning I left for Ganeshpuri. There was a lot of
traffic, taking us over two hours, crawling up from south
Mumbai to the suburbs of Dahisar, a distance of only 42km.
From Dahisar we took NH8 (National Highway 8) towards
Daman and Gujarat. The road was very scenic winding its way
up the hills surrounding Mumbai. Soon after leaving Dahisar we
came to a turning on the right sign posted for Ganeshpuri. This
was a small country road with many potholes. Ganeshpuri was
famous for hot mineral springs, it also used to have a lot of
snakes, seen as a blessing from Lord Shiva. It was believed to be
a very spiritual place, and one of the reasons for Swami
Muktananda establishing his ashram there. Our progress was
slow, it was difficult to drive more than 40km an hour because of
the pot holes.
After about 30 minutes of driving the roads suddenly became a
lot better. Shortly after that, a well maintained twenty foot wall
sprung up on our left, which had cut glass on the top, probably
to keep people out. This wall went on for over a km. It was the
boundary of the ashram. I later learnt that they had put up the
wall and restricted access after the local people started to come
and picnic in the grounds. The locals were disturbing the
devotees, many of whom had come from America, from there
meditation. We took a left turn and came to the entrance of the
190
 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION

ashram. Opposite the ashram was a bookshop and a cafeteria,

also run by the ashram. I took of my shoes and went into the
ashram.
It was a very large ashram, with large spacious gardens and a
considerable amount of accommodation for devotees. However,
the only parts of the ground that were accessible were a small
museum dedicated to Swami Muktananda and a meditation hall.
It was extremely peaceful there. The meditation hall was about a
hundred foot long and forty feet wide. In one corner there was a
large six foot tall purple amethyst crystal. There was an amazing
sense of calmness in this place. I sat down, crossed my legs and
closed my eyes. All I could hear was the soothing sound of my
own breathe flowing through my nose into my lungs, like the
distant sound of waves breaking on a sandy shore. I saw a ball of
purple approaching me, it stopped in front of me and then
radiated purple rays of light that soaked and permeated my whole
being. I wondered if it was related to the white light that Swami
Muktananda had seen the day after receiving Shaktipat. It was a
very soothing, calming experience. When I opened my eyes and
looked at my watch, I was surprised that over an hour had passed
by, it felt like just a few moments. Had I had a glimpse of the
infinite, I was not sure.
There were very few people around. There was a man who
looked as if he was in charge of the museum. I approached him
and asked whether I could meet with a Guru. I was told that the
Swami Chidvilasananda, affectionately known as Gurumayi and
Swami Muktananda‟s successor, no longer spent much time in
India but was focussing on spreading the divine message in
America.
There wasn‟t anybody there that could impart Shaktipat to me.
I would have to go to America and find Gurumayi. There was
probably a good spiritual decision for being in America rather
than in India, which I did not understand.
I was back to square one. No Guru, no Shakitpat, no special
short cut yoga. Perhaps Sai Baba and Srila Prabhupada were
correct that the only sure way was Bhakti Yoga. But then again, I
was a little confused. Should I worship Lord Krishna, or Lord
Shiva, or Sai Baba, or Shirdi Baba? Sai Baba and Srila
Prabhupada had said it did not matter Shiva, Krishna or even
Jesus, because all is the supreme. But if this was the case, and it
didn‟t matter, why go to such lengths for ISKCON to promote
Lord Krishna and others to promote Lord Shiva? I couldn‟t
decide what form of Bhakti to adopt, there were too many

191
 SECOND CHANCE

choices for Bhakti Yoga. Too many things to worship; all

different and all the same: simultaneously!
The following week, I was at the NCPA theatre next to the
apartment block. It was a play by a local playwright, a comedy,
on the complexities of love and marriage. At the end of the play
there was the usual jostling to get out of the theatre and back
home. It was in the middle of this jostling that my gaze fell on a
young moustached man, wearing a smart blue jacket. He looked
back at me and smiled. I smiled back. He came walking towards
me.
„Excuse me. I am wondering whether you can help me?‟ the
young man spoke.
„Yes I will try,‟ I replied.
„My name is Vishnu, and I am from Kathmandu in Nepal.‟
„Hello, my name is Arjuna. How can I help you?‟
„Do you know of any Transcendental Meditation centres near
here?‟asked Vishnu.
„No, I don‟t know of any centres. But perhaps I can help you to
find out,‟ I replied, curious to know why he was looking for a
Transcendental Meditation centre. Vishnu must have sensed my
inquisitiveness.
„You see, I have come from Nepal for a few days to visit and I
am going back soon. I am a Transcendental Meditation teacher
and I wanted to share this gift of meditation with some sincere
seekers. I wanted to get in touch with a centre here, so that they
could help me find someone to whom I could impart this gift,‟
said Vishnu, looking straight into my eyes.
I couldn‟t believe what I was hearing. I had been looking for
someone who could impart some special power, Shaktipat, to
me, and here was Vishnu who was looking for someone.
„Look. I would be interested in learning about Transcendental
Meditation and receiving this gift. Would it be possible for me to
learn and receive this gift?‟ I asked.
„Yes certainly. I have to leave tomorrow evening, but we can
meet tomorrow morning and I can teach you what you have to
do. Do you have email?‟
This was getting better and better.
„Yes I do have email,‟ I replied.
„Well we can stay in touch via email. I can guide you via the
internet.‟
I was getting very excited. Then I remembered my other
experiences with Sunil and Hiremath.
„Is there a charge for this gift?‟ I asked.

192
 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION

„No, there is no charge,‟ said Vishnu, „the more people that I

teach, the greater the blessing that I receive from my Guru, Sri
Maharashi Mahesh Yogi. It will be my blessing if you and I were
to meet tomorrow. You will need to bring some flowers, and a
piece of cloth and a coconut. That is all.‟
„I can arrange for these things. What time can we meet
tomorrow and how long will it take?‟
„Can we meet at 10 o‟clock? It will take four hours for me to
explain the meditation and give you a special and unique mantra
that will help you reach and become one with the cosmic divine.‟
Luckily it was a Saturday the next day and I did not have any
commitments. I gave Vishnu my address and agreed to meet
with him at 10 o‟clock the next day.
„Arjuna, can you read quickly?‟ asked Vishnu.
„Yes I can read quite quickly,‟ I replied.
„Then please take this book, and read it if you can, it will
explain the whole process of Transcendental Meditation,‟ Vishnu
dug into his bag and took out a book which he gave to me.
I read out aloud, the title: „Transcendental Meditation‟ by
Robert Roth. I‟ll read this with interest and I‟ll give it back to you
tomorrow when we meet.‟ I shook Vishnu‟s hand and left to
read the new book that I was given.
The book gave a very good overview of Transcendental
Meditation, Robert Roth wrote the following in his book:
―On January 29, 1959, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi arrived at San Francisco
International Airport, to introduce his Transcendental Meditation technique to the
world. Maharishi's message was simple and direct: Life is bliss. Man is born to
enjoy. Within everyone is an unlimited reservoir of energy, intelligence, and
happiness. …
The first study on Transcendental Meditation was conducted at the University of
California at Los Angeles in 1968 by physiologist Robert Keith Wallace. His
findings were published in the journals Science and Scientific American. This also
inspired a huge upsurge of research into the effects of Transcendental
Meditation….
More than four million people worldwide from every profession, age, educational
background, and religion practice Transcendental Meditation. During the past 25
years, more than 500 scientific research studies have been conducted on the effects of
the Transcendental Meditation technique at 210 independent universities and
research institutions in 33 countries. The studies -- many of which have been
published in leading scientific journals -- have shown that the Transcendental
Meditation program:
1.Reduces stress, insomnia, anxiety and depression
193
 SECOND CHANCE

2.Increases creativity, intelligence, energy, inner calm, happiness and self-esteem

3.Improves memory, learning ability, relationships, health
4.Promotes a younger biological age.
Transcendental Meditation is a simple, natural, effortless, easily-learned mental
technique practiced for 15 to 20 minutes twice daily, sitting comfortably with the
eyes closed. Transcendental Meditation is not difficult or complicated; it is a simple
procedure. There is no manipulation or suggestion, such as in hypnosis. It is easy
to practice and requires no ability to concentrate or control the mind. Anyone
beginning from age 10 can learn Transcendental Meditation easily. ….
Transcendental Meditation is a systematic technique that allows mental activity to
settle down to a silent state of awareness where the mind is calm, collected, yet fully
expanded, fully awake. This state is the simplest form of human awareness. It is
pure consciousness. It is the unified field of natural law, which modern physics
describes as the source of the infinite creativity and intelligence of nature.
Rest eliminates stress. The deeper the rest, the better it is. The rest gained during a
night's sleep is sufficient to eliminate some of the stress and fatigue that comes from
a full day of activity. But obviously a night's sleep, no matter how deep, isn't
enough. Transcendental Meditation provides very deep rest -- which is exactly
what the body needs to eliminate the very deeply-rooted stress that sleep or a
vacation never touch. In one stroke of Transcendental Meditation, the mind and
body are rejuvenated.
All Techniques Are Not the Same
Four major "meta-analyses" have been published that compare findings of
hundreds of scientific studies on Transcendental Meditation and all other forms of
meditation and relaxation. The studies show clearly that Transcendental
Meditation is far more effective in reducing anxiety; improving psychological health;
increasing self-actualization; and reducing cigarette, drug, and alcohol misuse.
Transcendental Meditation is not a religion -- it's a technique.
Millions of people of all religions, including clergy, practice Transcendental
Meditation. It supports all religions because it releases stress and purifies the mind,
body, and emotions of the person who practices it.
Transcendental Meditation is not a philosophy -- it's a simple,
mechanical technique. Turning on a light switch is a technique; it involves no
philosophy. Using a lever to move a large rock is a technique; it involves no
philosophy. And Transcendental Meditation is a scientific technique because it is
universally applicable, repeatable, and verifiable by anyone, anywhere.
Transcendental Meditation and Science

194
 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION

The source of intelligence within each of us is the same as the source of the
intelligence within nature, and that we have access to the unlimited creativity and
intelligence of nature within our own consciousness.
Recently, physicists have uncovered the unified field of natural law. It is a field of
pure energy and intelligence, which underlies everything in creation and which is
responsible for all forms and phenomena in the universe. The entire universe
emerges from the "self-interacting dynamics" of the unified field. And it is the
unified field that gives rise to all the laws of nature that governs the entire universe.
The unified field deep within nature is a field of unlimited energy, creativity, and
intelligence. The source of thought deep within every individual is also a field of
unlimited energy, creativity, and intelligence; and they are connected.
Maharishi states: "Modern physics has recently glimpsed the unified field of all the
laws of nature. Since ancient times the unified field has been described by Vedic
science -- a complete science of consciousness -- as the field of pure consciousness, the
field of infinite energy, creativity, and intelligence underlying man and nature.
Through Transcendental Meditation, pure consciousness -- the unified field -- can
be enlivened at the source of thought deep within the mind of every human being.
This means that we can display the infinite creativity, intelligence, and dynamism
of nature in our own life. This is our natural birthright."
Dr. Hagelin is an expert on supersymmetric unified quantum field theories and
has published over 90 papers on the subject in leading physics journals. Since
1976 he has studied Maharishi's descriptions of pure consciousness in the light of
modern physics. Recent advances in quantum physics, Dr. Hagelin says, provide
"substantial evidence that the unified field and pure consciousness are not two
separate fields, but one and the same."
In 1976 Maharishi introduced the Transcendental Meditation-Sidhi program,
which he described as advanced procedures or natural extensions of Transcendental
Meditation "to train consciousness to function from the unified field of natural law,
the self-referral state of pure consciousness."
Maharishi explained that the Transcendental Meditation-Sidhi program trained
the awareness to function in the same self-interacting style as the intelligence of
nature. In this way, Maharishi said, individuals would gain the support of the
total potential of nature's creativity and intelligence for the fulfillment of their
desires in daily life.
Scientific research showed that Maharishi's Transcendental Meditation-Sidhi
program significantly enhanced the benefits of Transcendental Meditation. It
increased EEG coherence, increased creativity and intelligence, and promoted
longevity.‖
On the one hand it seemed to be quite similar to what had
been described by Yogananda Parahamansa and Swami

195
 SECOND CHANCE

Muktananda. Robert Roth also mentioned the Sidhi program;

perhaps Transcendental Meditation was a way of performing the
Sidhi Yoga. But it was also quite different, there was no mention
of Shaktipat, and it seemed to be a very easy quick process that
anyone could do. This was very different from the teachings of
Yogananda and Muktananda, both of whom had said that it takes
a long while and tremendous dedication and discipline; which
was evidenced in their autobiographies. Even Srila Prabhupada
had warned other reporters to be weary of techniques that are
simple and do not require you to do very much.
However, on the other hand, there seemed to be so much
scientific evidence and proof that this technique worked. I knew
that the journal Scientific American wouldn‟t publish anything
unless it had been thoroughly researched. Perhaps this was a
revolutionary new technique. There would be no harm in trying
it out.
But there was a doubt, which I wanted to clear up with Vishnu.
The morning arrived; Ganesh went and got the flowers and the
piece of cloth. Vishnu arrived exactly at 10 o‟clock.
„Did you read the book and do you have any questions?‟ asked
Vishnu after the customary hellos.
„Yes I read the book,‟ I replied, „and I do have a question. In
the book it says that the whole initiation takes 7 days, and it
doesn‟t really describe exactly what is involved.‟
„It is good that you have read the book. You are right that in
the book it does say 7 days. The first three days are a basic
introduction to the whole process of meditation; it is designed
for the Westerner, who knows absolutely nothing about the
Hindu way of life. You already know those things and whatever
else you needed to know about Transcendental Meditation was
covered in the book. The critical day is day 4, on that day we do
a small puja, you are given a special unique mantra and are taught
how to use it. This process takes two hours. Days 5, 6 and 7 are
simply checking that you are doing everything properly. Once
again these checking days are there for Westerners, most of who
have never meditated or done anything like this before. It will
not be necessary in your case. We can also stay in touch over
email. Do you have any other questions?‟ Replied Vishnu.
I was impressed at how professional and concise Vishnu was in
his response.
„You will give me a special mantra? This was hardly mentioned
in the book. ‟
„Yes. It is a unique mantra, which I will determine,‟ replied
Vishnu, „you must not let anybody else know it, it is special and
196
 YOGA AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION

for you only. It is this unique mantra for you that makes the
Transcendental Meditation so special and superior to other
techniques.‟
„I was wondering about that. Robert Roth said that it was not
the same as other meditations and that it was superior. It
mentioned the Sidhi program, but it did not talk about
Shaktipat.‟
„I see that you know quite a lot about meditation. There are
many ways to receive Shaktipat. One way is through a special
energized mantra. That is what you will be receiving today. It is
the first step to attain self-realisation. The first mantra you get is
a basic mantra that will tune your body up. That is why you do
not need to spend a lot of time on it. For the Sidhi programme
you will be given more advanced mantras. There you will learn to
do yogic flying and other more advanced techniques. These
mantras have been discovered by the Maharashi Mahesh Yogi to
make it easier for everyone to gain access to the complexities of
Vedic scriptures, which until now have been only known to a
few.‟
„That explains a lot of things.‟
„If there are no more questions, then we should begin. I have to
catch a train to head back to Kathmandu. Shall we begin?‟ asked
Vishnu.
„Yes we can begin. I do not have any more questions.‟
Vishnu asked Ganesh to make some space in the corner of the
living room. He placed a photo of Maharashi Mahesh Yogi and
Maharishi‟s Yogi resting on the wall. He lit a candle in front of
the picture, put some flowers on the picture and kneeled down
praying. He was saying something under his breath. I wondered
whether this was similar to the secret mantras that had been said
by Bhagawan Nitayananda before giving Shaktipat to Swami
Muktananda. My body was starting to tingle with anticipation,
that today I would start my accelerated journey to self-realisation.
„Now I will give you your unique and special mantra,‟ said
Vishnu, „but first I want you to write down your name, your
place and date of birth.‟ I wrote down these things, which
Vishnu studied intently for a while. Then he came close to me
and whispered a sound in my ear.
„Did you hear that? I will say it to you again.‟ Once again
Vishnu came up to my ear and whispered the same sound in my
ear.
„Can you say that sound, out aloud?‟ asked Vishnu.
I spoke out the sound that he had told me. „Yes, that is the
correct way to pronounce it. You must never, ever, tell anyone
197
 SECOND CHANCE

that mantra. It is for you and you alone. It is especially for you.‟
Vishnu spoke slowly and solemnly. He then explained how to do
the meditation and asked if I would like to try.
I agreed and started to say my own special mantra, exactly the
way that he had explained it to me. I continued doing this for a
while and then stopped.
„What did you feel?‟ he asked.
„It was amazing. As soon as I started to say the mantra, I
started to feel that I was diving deep, deep, deep into space. It
was as if I was going very deep into outer space, it was all dark
around me, and it was nothingness.‟
„That is excellent.‟
I had found the experience a little scary, as I was left in
nothingness, it was completely dark, I couldn‟t feel or hear
anything. I had felt very alone and a little frightened. But then I
remembered the sensations that Swami Muktananda had
described, and so I reasoned that it was a sign that I was on the
right path to realization.
„It seems to be a very powerful mantra.‟
„Yes it is. You must practice this every morning for 15-20
minutes. You have picked this up very quickly. If you do not
mind I would like to leave a little early. Please do let me know
how you progress in your meditation. This is my email address.‟
Vishnu handed me his card with his email id.
„And this is your book. Thank you for this special gift.‟ I gave
Robert Roth‟s book back to Vishnu and shook his hand.
„It is I, who has received the blessing,‟ said Vishnu as he shook
my hand and waved good-bye.
I got on the computer and emailed Rajiv, my cousin, and sent a
copy of the email to Rita, keeping her informed of what I was up
to:
„Thanks for the books on Swami Muktananda. I read them with
great interest. Went to Ganeshpuri, had a great meditational
experience, but there was nobody there who could help me.
Today my prayers were answered. I met a total stranger, Vishnu,
who today gave me a special, unique mantra. A special mantra
developed by Maharashi Mahesh Yogi. I am on the path of Sidhi
Yoga as explained by Swami Muktananda. Just wanted to say
thank you for getting me on the right path.‟
Later on that day I checked my email, and got this very
surprising email from Rita.
„Arjuna, stop doing the meditation straight away. It is not what
you think. I will send you some information in the next day or
so. Do not do the meditation, it is dangerous.‟
198
 14 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

I wondered what Rita‟s email was about. I stopped the Transcendental

Meditation („TM‟) and waited to hear from her, as to why she was so
adamant for me to terminate TM. A couple of days went by and I
received another email from her:
“Dear Arjuna
TM and the Maharashi Mahesh Yogi are not what they claim to be. I
have cut and pasted the documents from the internet into word
documents that are attached to this email. You should read Patrick Ryan
on TM first, then Japa Yoga, then Maharashi Mahesh Yogi in Kerala,
Robert Kropinski and Shankracharya, and finally Guru Papers. You must
read the last one.
Please be careful. Stop going to all these Gurus.
I love you
Rita.”
I opened the first document and started to read it:
“The following is an excerpt from Combating Cult Mind Control, by Steven
Hassan, pp. 87-88, published by Park Street Press in Rochester Vermont in
1988 and 1990.

PATRICK RYAN AND TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITA-

TION
Patrick Ryan, now a successful entrepreneur, was involved in Transcendental
Meditation for ten years. He is a graduate of Maharishi International University
(MIU) in Fairfield, Iowa, an accredited institution. Most people think of TM as
a harmless way to relax through meditation. But for those who plunge deeply into
the TM organization, it takes on cult qualities.
199
 SECOND CHANCE

Pat has since founded a support group called TM-Ex for former members and
talks openly about the movement's darker side. "It has all of the characteristics of
a destructive cult," he says. "A lot of my friends and I have been greatly damaged
by our involvement with it."
Like most destructive cults, TM uses a good deal of deception (1). Its public
spokespeople say that "TM is not a philosophy, a religion, or a lifestyle." Yet, Pat
points out, "People become vegetarian, celibate, recite mantras composed of the
names of Hindu gods, and worship Maharishi Mahesh Yogi as the 'enlightened
master of the universe.'"
In its advertising, TM emphasizes the practical benefits of meditation - particularly
the reduction of stress. TM promoters show videos of members from all walks of life
testifying to its benefits. TM sales pitches are full of blood pressure charts, heart-
rate graphs, and other clinical evidence of TM's effectiveness. Not mentioned is the
fact that scientific tests show similar benefits can be obtained by listening to
soothing music, or by performing basic relaxation exercises available in books
costing a couple of dollars.
After a TM student pays up to $400 and receives his own personal mantra to
chant, he is told never to reveal it to another. Why? Because the same "unique"
mantra has been given - on the basis of age - to thousands of people (2).
Most people who learn TM never go beyond the prescribed twenty minutes of
meditating twice a day, in the morning and the afternoon. They can hardly be
called cult members. But a few continue to visit the TM centers for "checking," and
go on to pay for more and more advanced courses. Eventually they may get to the
point Pat did. He paid $3,000 to learn how to levitate and fly. In reality, he
found himself reciting the more "advanced" mantras while vigorously hopping up
and down with his legs crossed in the lotus position for two hours in the morning
and two hours in the afternoon.
Not surprisingly, he experienced painful muscle spasms, headaches, and
involuntary twitching. He went to his instructors for help. "They told me that I
was unstressing," he said. "They told me to go back and meditate and fly harder."
"It wasn't until Bob Kropinsky won the first lawsuit against TM for fraud and
negligence that I learned about people who have been hurt by Transcendental
Meditation(3)," Patrick continued, "the top leaders blame the members for
everything and haven't done anything to correct their policies." As in other
destructive cults, there is never a problem with the leader, the doctrine, or the
organization's behavior - it's always the fault of the members.
Pat began to question his involvement with TM only after sitting in on the
deprogramming of his sister Michelle from The Way International. As Way ex-
members told Michelle the criteria that define a mind control environment, Pat
began to hear alarm bells going off in his head. The same methods were used in

200
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

TM. He realized his problems were a response to practices that were short-
circuiting his nervous system.
Pat started digging into every source he could find to understand the history and
background of Maharishi and the organization. He discovered from former MIU
faculty members that some of the much-touted medical experiments had been
conducted without proper scientific procedure (4). He has now become very critical
of the organization in which he was previously involved, and active in warning
others of its destructive and deceptive practices.
Notes
1) "'Psychological Damage' from TM Found Worth $137,890," The
Washington Times Metro (Jan 14, 1987), 5B. Snapping, 174, 176.
2) Darrel Sifford, "A Psychiatrist Probes Effects of Transcendental Meditation,"
Philadelphia Inquirer (June 19, 1988), 2F.
3) Michael A. Persinger, Normand J. Carey, and Lynn A. Seuss, TM and Cult
Mania (Massachusetts: The Christopher Publishing House, 1980), 155-56.
4) Ibid., 60-65.‖
It was definitely true, the book that Vishnu gave me, had made specific
claims about not being a religion. I had known that it was part of
Hinduism, but I guess that people in America would not have realised
that this was the case. I then remembered the many quotes from
Christian Pastors and Rabbis all claiming that Transcendental Meditation
(TM) had nothing to do with religion. I agreed with Patrick Ryan that he,
as well as many other Americans, had been totally deceived about TM not
being religious. That did not worry me as much as the other claims in the
article that the mantras were not unique and were related to the age of the
person. I remembered that Vishnu had asked for my date of birth, after
which he had given me my special mantra.
I went onto the internet and started my own search on Transcendental
Meditation. I was surprised to see so many negative articles on the
subject. Eventually I came across an article that described how the
„unique‟ mantras were assigned based on age. I looked at my age and the
corresponding mantra was „Shreem‟, this was the same mantra that
Vishnu had given me. I wondered why Vishnu had not told me that it
was simply based on age, why did he not tell me the truth.
I checked the net and it was true that Robert Kropinski had successfully
filed a case against Transcendental Meditation. However, I was also very
wary that America is very litigious, and dependent on the Judge and jury
anything was possible over there.

201
 SECOND CHANCE

But, I was interested to know what was in the other articles that Rita
had sent. I read the „Japa Yoga‟ article next. It was on the different
Mantras, written by some other Guru:
“From Japa Yoga: A Comprehensive Treatise on Mantra-Sastra
Swami Sivananda, The Divine Life Society, India, 1992, pp94-99.
A Bija-Akshara is a seed-letter. It is a very powerful Mantra. Every Devata has
his or her own Bija-Akshara. The greatest of all Bija-Aksharas is OM or
Pranava, for it is the symbol of the Para-Brahman or the Paramatman Himself.
OM contains within itself all the other Bija-Aksharas. OM is the general source
or the common seed from which all the particular sounds or secondary seeds proceed.
The letters of the alphabet are only emanations from OM which is the root of all
sounds and letters. There is no Mantra superior to or greater than OM. OM, as it
is pronounced ordinarily, is an outward gross form of the real subtle inaudible state
of sound which is called the Amatra or the immeasurable fourth transcendental
state. As the various Devatas are the aspects or forms of the One Supreme Being,
so the various Bija-Aksharas or Bija-Mantras are so many aspects or forms of the
Supreme Bija or Mantra, viz., OM. Even the letters 'A', 'U' and 'M' do not
really give the transcendental or original state of sound. Even this triliteral sound is
only an expression or manifestation of the highest primal Dhvani or vibration. The
transcendental sound of OM is heard only by Yogis and not by the ordinary ear.
In the correct pronunciation of OM the sound proceeds from the navel, with a deep
and harmonious vibration, and gradually manifests itself by stages at the upper
part of the nostrils where the Anusvara or the Chandrabindu is sounded.
Generally a Bija-Mantra consists of a single letter. Sometimes it constitutes several
syllables. For example, the Bija-Mantra 'Kam' has a single letter with the
Anusvara or the Chandrabindu which forms termination of all Bija-Mantras. In
the Chandrabindu, Nada and Bindu are blended together. Some Bija-Mantras
are made up of compound letters, such as the Mantra 'Hreem'. The Bija-Mantras
have a significant inner meaning and often do not convey any meaning on their face.
Their meaning is subtle, mystic. The form of the Bija-Mantra is the form of the
Devata signified by it.
The Bijas of the five Mahabhutas or great elements, i.e., of the Devatas or the
presiding intelligences of the elements, viz., Ether, Air, Fire, Water and Earth,
are respectively Ham, Yam, Ram, Vam and Lam. The meanings of a few Bija-
Mantras are given here, to serve as examples.
OM : OM consists of three letters: 'A', 'U' and 'M'. It signifies the three periods
of time, the three states of consciousness, and the entire existence. 'A' is the waking
state or Virat and Visva. 'U' is the dreaming state of Hiranyagarbha and
Taijasa. 'M' is the sleeping state or Isvara and Prajna. Study the
Mandukyopanishad in detail in order to understand the meaning of OM.

202
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

HAUM: In this Mantra, Ha is Siva. Au is Sadasiva. The Nada and Bindu

mean that which dispels sorrow. With this Mantra Lord Siva should be
worshipped.
DUM : Here Da means Durga. U means to protect. Nada means the mother of
the universe. Bindu signifies action (worship or prayer). This is the Mantra of
Durga.
KREEM : With this Mantra Kalika should be worshipped. Ka is Kali. Ra is
Brahman. Ee is Mahamaya. Nada is the mother of the universe. Bindu is the
dispeller of sorrow.
HREEM This is the Mantra of Mahamaya or Bhuvanesvari. Ha means Siva.
Ra is Prakriti. Ee means Mahamaya. Nada is the mother of the universe. Bindu
means the dispeller of sorrow.
SHREEM: This is the Mantra of Mahalakshmi. Sa is Mahalakshmi. Ra
means wealth. Ee means satisfaction or contentment. Nada is Apara or the
manifested Brahman or Isvara. Bindu means the dispeller of sorrow.
AIM: This is the Bija-Mantra of Sarasvati. Ai means Sarasvati. Bindu means
the dispeller of sorrow.
KLEEM : This is the Kamabija. Ka means the Lord of desire (Kamadeva). Ka
may also mean Krishna. La means Indra. Ee means contentment or satisfaction.
Nada and Bindu mean that which brings happiness and sorrow.
HOOM :In this Mantra, Ha is Siva. U is Bhairava. Nada is the Supreme.
Bindu means the dispeller of sorrow. This is the threefold Bija of Varma of armor
(coat of mail).
GAM : This is the Ganesha-Bija. Ga means Ganesha. Bindu means the
dispeller of sorrow.
GLAUM :This also is a Mantra of Ganesha. Ga means Ganesha. La means
that which pervades. Au means luster or brilliance. Bindu means the dispeller of
sorrow. KSHRAUM: This is the Bija of Narasimha. Ksha is Narasimha. Ra
is Brahma. Au means with teeth pointing upwards. Bindu means the dispeller of
sorrow.‖

I realised that I had been simply chanting the name of the Goddess
Mahalaxmi, the Goddess of wealth and prosperity. That is not what I had
wanted. I had wanted to be spiritually enlightened. I wondered if Vishnu
was aware of what he was teaching. I too, like Patrick Ryan, had been
misled. I was fortunate that I had not spent vast sums of money on being
tricked.

203
 SECOND CHANCE

The next article was a transcript of a speech that Maharashi Mahesh

Yogi had given in Kerala, South India, in the early 1950s; the audience
were other gurus and those training under gurus. This what he said:
―For training the mind through sound we can take any word. Even the word
"mike" can be taken. By reducing the sound of the word "mike" to its subtler and
still subtler stages and allowing the mind to go on experiencing all the stages one by
one, the mind can be trained to be so sharp as to enter into the subtlest stage of the
sound 'mike', transcending which it will automatically get into the realm of Sat-
Chidanandam and experience it. Thus we find that any sound can serve our
purpose of training the mind to become sharp. But we do not select the sound at
random, We do not select any sound like 'mike', flower, table, pen, wail, etc,
because such ordinary sounds can do nothing more than merely sharpening the
mind; whereas there are some special sounds which have the additional efficacy of
producing vibrations whose effects are found to be congenial to our way of life. This
is the scientific reason why we do not select any word at random. For our
practice, we select only the suitable mantras of personal Gods.
Such mantras fetch to us the grace of personal Gods and make us happier in every
walk of life.
While making a reference to the Mantras, in this manner, I feel like touching a
very vital aspect of Sadhna, which things are blurred in the present atmosphere of
too much talk of Vedanta.
Obviously enough there are two ways of life, the way of life of a Sanyasi
and the way of life of a householder. One is quite opposed to the other.
A Sanyasi renounces everything of the world, whereas a householder needs and
accumulates everything. Shastras declare both the ways of life to be the paths of
emancipation. Both are said to be the "Moksha-Marga" Nivarthi Marga and
'Privathi Marga'. The one realizes through renunciation and detachment, while the
other goes through all attachments and accumulation or all that is needed for
physical life. We have two different sets of Mantras to suit the two
ways of life. Mantras for the Sanyasis have the effect of increasing the sense of
detachment and renunciation, and also have the power of destroying the objects of
worldly affections, if there should survive any such objects for him. Quite contrary to
this are the Mantras suitable for the householder, which have the efficacy of
harmonizing and enriching the material aspect of life also.
The Mantras of the Sanyasi have a destructive effect in the
material field of life, whereas the Mantras suited to the householder envisage
constructive values also.
"Om" is the Mantra for the Sanyasi. The Sanyasi repeats "Om" "Om"
Om". It is given to him at the time of 'Sanyas-Diksha', at the time when he has
completely renounced attachment to the world. Renunciation and detachment
increase with the repetition of 'Om', 'Om' is chanted aloud by a Sanyasi to put on
end to his desires. Desire is destroyed by loudly chanting the mantra 'Om'. And if
204
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

there is of any desire deeply rooted in the mind of the Sanyasi, the chanting of
'Om' will result in destruction of the object of such desire in
order to make the Sanyasi wholly desireless. The Sanyasi attains
peace through the renunciation and destruction of desires, whereas the peace comes
to the householder when his needs are satisfied, when his desires are fulfilled. The
mantras for the householders have the effect of fulfilling the desires.
If unfortunately the householder begins to repeat the pranava
Mantra viz. 'Om', 'Om" Om' he experiences destructive effects
in his material life. The effect starts with monetary loss and then goes on to
destroy objects of affection, one by one. Such a man, when he finds loss of money
and separation from the dear ones, he is reduced to utter peacelessness and
frustration. Where is the chance of spiritual development or experience of Peace and
happiness for such a dejected soul? The path of peacelessness and misery in the
world cannot lead to Eternal happiness. If the man is proceeding towards Eternal
happiness, every day he should feel the increase of peace and happiness, and this
alone will assure him that he is proceeding towards abiding peace and eternal
happiness. If you walk towards the light you should be able to feel the increase of
light at every step. If you are spending some time in devotion to God, you should
feel peace and happiness in life. If you are not feeling peace and happiness you
should be wise enough to doubt the correctness of your devotion, you should be wise
enough to know that your method of devotion is wrong, that the Mantras that you
are repeating do not suit you.
The mantras that suit the Sanyasis can never suit the householders.
Hundreds of God-loving and God-fearing families have been
ruined due to the destructive effects of Sanyasa Mantra viz,
"Om". "Om" destroys desires and also destroys the objects of desires and
therefore it produces calmness of mind and renunciation and detachment from
material life only to Sanyasis when they repeat Om; to them it brings the
experience of peace of mind and from this experience they generally recommend the
chanting of 'Om' to their followers. But when a householder repeats
Om, he experiences that as long as he is repeating 'Om' he feels
peace of mind, but when he comes out to indulge in business or
household work, he finds that the air is against his desire and
schemes. The silencing effect on the mind and destructive effects in material life,
both are experienced side by side. Some people say that we should ignore material
life in regard to the devotional practices and Mantras. But this is a fool's ideology.
Can you possibly ignore the considerations of material life, when the Mantras do
affect it? Select a path which will make you happier in your material life also. Do
not live in a fool's paradise. Do not think that your sufferings end miseries of today
will work as reservations in the galleries of heaven for tomorrow. Be peaceful and
happy in the present and try to make this state permanent. This is the path of
Deliverance in Life Jeevan-Mukti, the most exalted state in human existence, the
state of abiding Peace and Eternal Bliss. And this you are entitled to have through
205
 SECOND CHANCE

correct and suitable Sadhana. And because the Mantras play an important role in
the field of Sadhana, you must be very, very careful in the selection of the Mantra.
The theory of Mantras is the theory of sound. It is most scientific and natural.
Ladies should never repeat any Mantra beginning with Om. The
pronunciation of Om is like fire to the ladies. This is the
practical experience of many devoted ladies who repeated 'Om
Namah Shivaya' or 'Om NamonAryanaya' or 'Om Namo
Bhagwate Vasudevaya' or any such mantra beginning with Om.
It cannot be God's wish that you should suffer in your devotion to him. Do not
cling to the unhelpful Mantras. The moment you find you have got into the wrong
train, it is wise to get down from it as soon as possible. It is foolish to stick on to
the wrong train and go wherever it takes you.‖
So Maharishi Mahesh Yogi was totally aware that the mantras were of
personal Gods. He also knew that the TM mantras, for the person that
was chanting them, would increase worldly possessions and worldly
satisfaction. Perhaps that is why TM was so popular in the States. But it
was Maharishi‟s comments on the mantra „OM‟ that surprised me the
most, that chanting OM by someone who had not given up the material
way of life would be a disaster. His comment on „Om Namah Shivaya‟
being unsuitable for ladies was in contradiction to what Swami
Muktananda was telling people. I was beginning to get very confused.
Unfortunately the next article only increased my level of confusion and
suspicion, as to whom if anyone really knew what they were doing. The
next article was a transcript of an interview between Robert Kropinski, a
former TM teacher and follower of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, and Shree
Shankaracharya Swaroopanand Saraswati, a pre-eminent disciple of
Swami Brahmananda Saraswati (Guru Dev), who is considered Mahesh
Yogi's Spiritual Master. Robert Kropinski was a former teacher of TM.
He filed a lawsuit against the TM movement on the grounds of fraud,
which was settled out of court in 1991. After leaving the TM movement
in 1983 he joined another Eastern group, International Society of Divine
Love, ISDL. He had since left ISDL, and was no longer interested in
pursuing his spiritual life under the control of a guru.
The article was a series of questions that Robert Kropinski had asked
the Shakaracharya. It firstly explained what is a Shankaracharya and the
whole basis of the Guru/Disciple tradition:
―Introduction: Over a thousand years ago, Adi Shankara, renowned for his
revival of the knowledge of Vedic Sanatan Dharma or the worship of God,
according to the Vedic Scriptures, and also for his commentaries on several major
Hindu Scriptures, established four major monasteries in India. These monasteries
or "Maths'' were located in the North, South, East and Western parts of India.
These Maths or "Peeths'' (monasteries) were overseen by "Shankaracharyas''
according to the tradition and wishes prescribed by Adi Shankara. Shankara was
206
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

also widely accepted in India as the descension of Lord Shiva, the Hindu deity
responsible for the final dissolution of the universe. The primary responsibility of
each of the four Shankaracharyas, while overseeing the four Maths, has been the
preservation of the major systems of Hindu philosophy which form the basis of the
Hindu religion. Within the monasteries, the Shankaracharyas took disciples, who
in some cases, assumed the revered title of Shankaracharya upon the death of their
Spiritual Master. Those Shankaracharyas travelled extensively throughout India
preaching their particular sect's beliefs to all Hindus.
The title "Shankaracharya'' is a traditional title handed down to that person, who
according to Adi Shankara, the original Shankaracharya, is Brahmin by birth,
established in Yoga, or in other words, whose soul is in union with God and who
is thereby Divine. Having achieved this union through lifetimes of spiritual practice
and renunciation, now, as living Divinity, he is "pujapad,'' his feet are worthy of
worship. His Scriptural understanding is so perfect that he can synthesize the
Scriptures of all Religions. He is Vedanta Incarnate, the embodiment of Hindu
Scripture, and further, he must be recognized as Shankaracharya by the other three
Shankaracharyas, having received proper initiation by them according to Hindu
Scriptural injunctions. Recognized also means that the other Shankaracharyas are
willing to sit alongside him at major religious festivals.
According to the rules laid down by Shankara, the only possibility of removing a
Shankaracharya is, if, during his lifetime he should become mentally infirm or
prove by his actions or judgment that he is not qualified to hold the title which is
held sacred by Hindus. If such a case exists, a new Shankaracharya is elected by a
learned body of pundits, called "Kashi Vidwat Parishad,'' according to the
tradition. In this way, the title of Shankaracharya and these Maths or monasteries
have been maintained and handed down from Master to Disciple for thousands of
years. This lineage is commonly known as the "Shankaracharya Tradition.''
Robert Kropinski explained his rationale for talking to the
Shankaracharya:
―In October 1986, several months before my case against the Transcendental
Meditation movement was to begin in Washington, D.C., I contacted Shree
Shankaracharya Swaroopanand Saraswati. Shree Shankaracharya, reported and
pictured in The Illustrated Weekly of India(2), has the unique distinction of
holding the dual title, Jagadguru Shankaracharya of the Jyotir Math (Jyotish
Peeth Monastery) of Northern India, as well as the Shankaracharya of the
Dwarka Math in Western India.
Swami Swaroopanand Saraswati was a pre-eminent disciple of Swami
Brahmananda Saraswati (Guru Dev). Brahmananda Saraswati, whose picture is
customarily seen behind Mahesh Yogi, was also Mahesh Yogi's Spiritual Master.
Guru Dev held the title of Shankaracharya of Jyotir Math, the monastery located
in Northern India, until his death, by poisoning, in 1954.

207
 SECOND CHANCE

My interest in contacting the Shankaracharya was to attempt to discern whether or

not, from the Shankaracharya's understanding of Indian Scripture; I had been
misled by Mahesh Yogi. Further, as a teacher of TM, I wanted to know if, in fact,
I represented the Shankaracharya Tradition as I had been told by Mahesh Yogi.
Most of all, it was an attempt to find out what had happened to my mind from the
practice of TM and the TM Sidhi programs.‖
This was all very intriguing. I wondered who had poisoned Maharishi
Mahesh Yogi‟s guru, Guru Dev. I also wondered how someone who was
meant to be enlightened such as Guru Dev would not have known that
he was about to be poisoned, perhaps he had let it happen.
―I began by telling him how I had started practicing TM, met Mahesh Yogi (as
Shankaracharya called him), and had eventually become a teacher of TM. In
particular, I read statements from TM literature saying TM came from the
Shankaracharya tradition. I then read aloud the famous statement which was
allegedly written by a Shankaracharya, which described Mahesh Yogi as the
protector of the Shankaracharya Tradition, Rishi of Rishis and a descension of
Shankara himself. I explained that these kinds of statements were used on courses
and during fundraisers by TM officials to garner financial and emotional support
from TM members. Further, I spoke aloud the sixteen mantras: eng, em, enga,
ema, aing, aim, ainga, aima, shiring, shirim, hiring, hirim, kiring, kirim, shyam
and shyama, and the method of giving them by age as I had been taught by
Mahesh Yogi. Next came the advanced techniques. Finally, I described the TM
Sidhi Program.
Shankaracharya looked physically distressed and his bowed head shook from side
to side as the statements were translated. Then, after what seemed to be an eternal
silence, he began to speak. He stated that his Master had left a will which clearly
stated the names of those individuals who were to assume the title and
responsibilities of Shankaracharya after his death. After the murder of his Master,
the next in line was Shantinand. He said Mahesh immediately had him moved
into the ashram to assume authority. Then, [Mahesh] used [Shantinand's] name
after leaving India, to show that he taught under the authority of Shankaracharya.
Years later, Shantinand finally gave up the title and Mahesh had Vishnu
Devanand assume the title and possession of the ashram. In so doing, they also
clearly ignored the will of Guru Dev which had specified the name
Dvarikeshanand Saraswati as the second in line to receive the title. This was to
occur, according to the will of Guru Dev, should Shantinand prove unqualified or
leave the ashram. Swaroopanand continued, stating, it was written by my Lord
(Guru Dev) that "this is my will and command.'' He said that the scheme by
Mahesh to appoint Vishnu Devanand was clearly gross disrespect of his own
Master's desire. He said all of this was being done to delude Westerners. Mahesh
needs a Shankaracharya to continue spreading his net of deception. He said, as

208
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

Shankaracharya, it is my clear and absolute duty to uphold the true teaching of

Shree Shankara.
Robert Kropinski: Can you explain to Maharaji (The Shankaracharya) that I
was trained by Mahesh Yogi as a teacher of TM, and I can explain to him what I
was taught. I don't understand whether or not what I was taught is correct.
Explain to him that I was given 16 mantras, by Maharishi that I can pronounce
to Maharaji. I will pronounce them one after the other as I was trained. They are
to be given out by certain ages. I can read them to Maharaji and then he can
comment whether they are correct or incorrect. If he can explain how they are
supposed to be used, or whether they are supposed to be used or not. Eng, em, enga,
ema, aing, aim, ainga, aima, hiring, hirim, kiring, kirim, shiring, shirim, shyam,
shyama.
Shankaracharya: Fact is fact; these things you have described to me have nothing
to do with the Shankaracharya Tradition. The so-called mantras or meaningless
sounds as you have described them are primarily used to gain material wealth and
comfort, not for spiritual enlightenment. Further, my Master (Guru Dev) never
gave the mantras you have described, his mantras were not mantras for material
comfort, his were to uplift the soul, remove his material attachments and for
realization of God.
Q: [The following paragraph was then read to Shankaracharya from a TM
brochure]: Furthermore, there is a specific set of mantras handed down for centuries
in the Shankaracharya tradition that seems to have a special property of becoming
increasingly pleasing as they are perceived a finer stages. These particular sounds
are mantras in Sanskrit. The Shankaracharya tradition has preserved not only
these sounds but also a system of rules or formulas by which they are to be assigned
to individuals.
And this is what he (Mahesh) is saying in print. These are the mantras he gives to
people.
Shankaracharya: He (Mahesh) made them up. These are not given by Guruji
(Guru Dev). He (Mahesh) was an ordinary clerk.
People here in India are concerned. He (Mahesh) cheated millions of rupees from
people like him (Kropinski). Because of his cheating practices, people might lose
faith in Indian Spirituality. Swami Vivekanand and Swami RamTirth left a
good impression in America. We wanted that impression to continue. It makes me
sad that some people from here like Rajneesh and Mahesh went there (to America)
and they destroyed those good feelings. Mahesh has caused a severe blow to Indian
culture.
Q: [The following statement was then read to Shankaracharya from a TM
brochure. It was explained that this brochure was allegedly spoken by
Shankaracharya about Mahesh. Later, Bevan Morris, the President of MIU,

209
 SECOND CHANCE

read the statement to TM participants by attempting to raise money from

donations.]
He (Mahesh Yogi) comes from the tradition of Shree Shankaracharya. He
(Mahesh) is a disciple just like the Master (Guru Dev). He is the bestower of light
and is the incarnation of Shankaracharya, the (Mahesh) is the Rishi of the Rishis
(Divine Seers), greatest of the great, greater than greatness, he is the reason of the
welfare of the tradition of Shankaracharya...
Shankaracharya: Only he can dispel darkness who does not want anything. Only
such a person can drive people out of darkness to light. But he himself (Mahesh) is
in darkness.
We want that people like you should tell others that he does not know anything
about yoga. Neither is he serving American people nor Indian people.
Q: Mahesh Yogi claims that he preaches yoga according to the instruction of his
Guru. The truth of the matter, however, is that Guru Dev never asked anyone
who is not a Brahmin by birth to go and spread his teachings. What is your
opinion?
Shankaracharya: This is true. In reality, preaching, initiating, guiding people
engaged in spiritual pursuits, is the duty of those who are born in a Brahmin
family. If he is a follower of Sanatan Dharma (the Hindu religion), he should not
do what he is doing. This is against the orders of his Guru. Moreover, making
others write puujya (revered), calling himself Maharishi (a great seer) is totally
inappropriate. No assembly of saints has either conferred upon him a title of
Maharishi nor has announced him puujya.
In the ashram he was doing the work of typing and writing and translation. Then
he became a sadhu. However, he has never practiced yoga.
It is said that Guru Dev was given poison. Who gave that poison we don't know
but we know that there was poison in his body. When Guru Dev's body became
unwell, then we wanted him to go to Kashi to rest. But he (Mahesh) removed him
from that trip forcibly and took him to speak in Calcutta. There he died.
After that, this man spread his net. He went abroad. First to Singapore. The
expatriate Indians there, thinking that he is the disciple of Shankaracharya,
received him well and got him a ticket for the United States. After going to
America, he brought the Beatles back here. It was rumored that he did
inappropriate things with them and that's why they left him and went away.
He later opened many camps and pretended that he could teach people to read
minds and levitate. No one, however, succeeded in learning the things he promised.
He himself does not know or practice yoga. He does not know anything about
those things.‖

210
 MANTRAS & FALSE GURUS

I was confused and annoyed. According to this Shankaracharya,

Maharishi Mahesh Yogi was a fake. The mantras that he was using were
made up by him and were never used by Guru Dev. Furthermore,
Maharishi Mahesh Yogi was just some „low caste clerk‟ who never
practiced any form of Yoga, that the TM Siddhi Program was a total fake.
Each and everyone of the Shankaracharaya‟s knew that he was a fake,
charging for instruction was against the Shankaracharya tradition.
This was a very impressive list of allegations. It did seem odd that there
were very few TM centers in India and that Maharishi Mahesh had spent
the vast majority of his time outside of India, in the Netherlands. Then
there was the deception, either deliberate or unintentional, through
omission by Vishnu, about the true nature of the mantras and how they
were allocated.
I had now come across Reiki, the teachings of Yogananda
Parahamansa, Srila Prabhubapada (ISKCON), Swami Muktananda and
Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. All of them claimed to be the universal truth and
the only way. Apart from agreeing that there was a God, somewhere up
there and that our aim in life is to be at one with him, there was little else
that they agreed on. There was total disagreement on the type of yoga,
the mantras, the form and name of the God. I wondered whether it made
a difference, they seemed to say that it did make a difference. Each one
had many ardent followers who claimed that they had found true eternal
bliss, by following their guru.
Yet which one of them was telling the truth. They could not all be right,
and each claimed that the others had got it wrong. Each claiming that
there technique was exclusively the only way and preferred way in this
day and age.
There was still one more article to go through. It was getting late. I left
it until the next day.

211
SECOND CHANCE

212
 15 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

It seemed that I was going round and round in circles. Each time that I
felt that I had found a Guru or an explanation of the truth; I would end
up with more questions than I had to begin with.
Rita had said that the last article was the most important, „The Guru
Papers‟. It was the most important of the documents that she had sent,
and also the most disturbing. It was a series of quotes that were taken
from a book called „The Guru Papers: Masks of Authoritarian Power‟ by
Joel Kramer. This is what Rita had pasted into the document:
‗The following quotes are taken from Part One of the Guru Papers and are
deemed by ex-members to be strikingly accurate in describing the dynamics of a cult
guru.
"If an authority not only expects to be obeyed without question, but either punishes
or refuses to deal with those who do not, that authority is authoritarian." (p.15)
"Gurus can arouse intense emotions as there is extraordinary passion in
surrendering to what one perceives as a living God." (p.33)
This statement was very true, each of the Gurus claimed to be a living
God, or in the case of Srila Prabhupada actively encouraged his disciples
to treat him like one. The document continued.
"In ‗spiritual‘ realms fear and desire can become as extreme as they get. When a
living person becomes the focus of such emotions, the possibility of manipulation is
correspondingly extreme." (p.41)
"In the East a guru is more than a teacher. He is a doorway that supposedly
allows one to enter into a more profound relationship with the spiritual. A
necessary step becomes acknowledging the guru‘s specialness and mastery over that
which one wishes to attain. The message is that to be a really serious student,
213
 SECOND CHANCE

spiritual realization must be the primary concern. Therefore, one‘s relationship

with the guru must, in time, become one‘s prime emotional bond, with all others
viewed as secondary. In fact, typically other relationships are pejoratively referred to
as ‗attachments.‘" (p.49)
"So although most gurus preach detachment, disciples become attached to having
the guru as their center, whereas the guru becomes attached to having the power of
being others‘ center." (p.50)
This was true, I had never thought about this. If I was to rely on the
Guru totally, then surely and inevitably the Guru‟s own ego would
increase. But I was told that the Guru‟s were enlightened, that they were
beyond this attachment and so they were unaffected. They were meant to
be different from other mortals. They were beyond ego and attachment.
That is what they claimed. However, many of them after becoming well
known gurus appeared to be living luxuriously, far better than their fellow
Indians. This was a paradox which I could not understand.
"When abuses are publicly exposed, the leader either denies or justifies the
behaviors by saying that ‗enemies of the truth‘ or ‗the forces of evil‘ are trying to
subvert his true message. Core members of the group have a huge vested interest in
believing him, as their identity is wrapped up in believing in his righteousness.
Those who begin to doubt him at first become confused and depressed, and later feel
betrayed and angry. The ways people deny and justify are similar: Since supposedly
no one who is not enlightened can truly understand the motives of one who is, any
criticism can be discounted as a limited perspective. Also, any behavior on the part
of the guru, no matter how base, can be imputed to be some secret teaching or
message that needs deciphering."
By holding gurus as perfect and thus beyond ordinary explanations, their presumed
specialness can be used to justify anything. Some deeper, occult reason can always
be ascribed to anything a guru does. The guru is said to take on the karma of
others, and that is why his body has whatever problems it has. The guru is obese or
unhealthy because he is too kind to turn down offerings. Besides, he gives so much
that a little excess is understandable. He punishes those who disobey him not out of
anger but out of necessity, as a good father would. He uses sex to teach about
energy and detachment. He lives an opulent life to break people‘s simplistic
preconceptions of what ego-loss should look like. It also shows how detached and
unconcerned he is about what others think. For after all, ‗Once enlightened, one
can do anything.‘ Believing this dictum makes any action justifiable.
It was only now that I remembered what I had seen when I was going
through Swami Muktananda‟s autobiography. I had found it odd when I
was looking at the pictures of Swami Muktananda‟s guru, and the
photographs of other Saints, that he highly regarded, they had all looked
in a terrible physical condition. It was all the more surprising as one of
the many benefits of Sidhi Yoga was a holding back of the signs of ageing
214
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

and good physical constitution. This was not very apparent from the
photographs. Sai Baba was also quite old now, but was getting
increasingly frail. This was a paradox, as to how a living God could be
susceptible to the same problems as everyone else. It was true that there
were always explanations, but the alternative explanation could always be
that they are not a living God and are ordinary people, who have the
ability to delude others. This was a distinct possibility which was
beginning to grow in my mind, after having met so many of them and
read their enlightened teachings.
―People justify and rationalize in gurus what in others would be considered
unacceptable because they have a huge emotional investment in believing their guru
is both pure and right." (p.52)
"That interest in one‘s own salvation is totally self-centered is a conundrum rarely
explored." (p.54)
This was another interesting point that got me thinking. It was meant to
be about being selfless. There was another paradox, how could being shut
up in an Ashram, in peaceful and tranquil surroundings, be of help to
those that were outside, the poor, the homeless, the orphaned. Going
into an Ashram and „hanging out‟ with other like minded people, shutting
oneself from the outside world did seem to be quite a selfish rather than a
selfless act. Maybe I just did not understand.
"So disciples believe they are loved unconditionally, even though this love is
conditional on continued surrender. Disciples in the throes of surrender feel they
have given up their past, and do not, consciously at least, fear the future. Feeling
totally cared for and accepted, at the universe‘s center, powerful, and seemingly
unafraid of the future are all achieved at the price of giving one‘s power to another,
thus remaining essentially a child." (p56)
"It is not at all unusual to be in an authoritarian relationship and not know it. In
fact, knowing it can interfere with surrender. Any of the following are strong
indications of belonging to an authoritarian group:
No deviation from the party line is allowed. Anyone who has thoughts or feelings
contrary to the accepted perspective is made to feel wrong or bad for having them.
Whatever the authority does is regarded as perfect or right. Thus behaviors that
would be questioned in others are made to seem different and proper.
One trusts that the leader or others in the group know what‘s best.
It is difficult to communicate with anyone not in the group.
One finds oneself defending actions of the leader (or other members) without having
firsthand knowledge of what occurred.

215
 SECOND CHANCE

At times one is confused and fearful without knowing why. This is a sign that
doubts are being repressed." (p.57)
"Traditional gurus teach what they were taught. Most gurus‘ training in dealing
with disciples is through example – watching their own guru. They learn to
recognize, reinforce, and reward surrender, and to negate non-surrender. Aside
from the more tangible rewards, they reinforce devotion with attention and
approval, and punish its lack by withdrawing them. Though some gurus say that
doubts are healthy, they subtly punish them. Doubt is not the way to get into the
inner circle. Believing surrender is essential for transmitting their teachings, some
gurus could be aware they are manipulating people to surrender, but think they are
doing so ‗for their own good.‘ (If this were in fact true, it would mean that deep
truths are only accessible via an authoritarian mode.) This can not only justify
manipulation, but also justify dissembling in order to eliminate people‘s doubts –
all this being done in the name of fostering spiritual growth." (p.62)
"The power of conversion experiences lies in the psychological shift from confusion
to certainty." (p.65)
"People whose power is based on the surrender of others develop a repertoire of
techniques for deflecting and undermining anything that questions or challenges
their status, behavior, or beliefs. They ridicule or try to confuse people who ask
challenging questions." (p.66)
I definitely found the answers given by those that I came across, or the
transcripts of Guru‟s interviews very difficult to understand. I had
understood some of the things that they were saying to be quite
contradictory. On the other hand it was quite possible that I did not have
sufficient experience to understand the deep spiritual truths that they
were expounding.
"Is experiencing intense energy a sign of spirituality, or is the experience in the
same vein as young ladies who swoon in the presence of rock stars?" (p.68)
"To be thought enlightened, one must appear not only certain that one is, but
certain about most everything else, too." (p.70)
"Gurus undercut reason as a path to understanding. When they do allow
discursive inquiry, they often place the highest value on paradox. Paradox easily
lends itself to mental manipulation. No matter what position you take, you are
always shown to be missing the point; the point being that the guru knows
something you do not." (p.74)
This could be a reason for the paradoxes that I kept on coming across.
However, it may be that the universe itself is some huge, gigantic
paradox.
"Their stance toward outsiders is of benign superiority." (p77)

216
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

I definitely got the sense of assuming a very superior tone in the

writings of Srila Prabhupada, and to a lesser extent in the writings of
Swami Muktananda. Here was another paradox that egoless men, could
come across as being very superior in their attitudes towards those that
were not their disciples, and towards other Gurus.
"As long as the guru still sees the possibility of realizing his ambitions, the way he
exercises power is through rewarding the enthusiasms of his followers with praise
and positions in his hierarchy. He also whets and manipulates desire by offering
‗carrots,‘ and promising that through him the disciples‘ desires will be realized,
possibly even in this lifetime. The group itself becomes an echo of the guru, with the
members filling each other‘s needs. Within the community there is a sense of both
intimacy and potency, and a celebratory, party-like atmosphere often reigns.
Everything seems perfect; everyone is moving along the appropriate spiritual path.
The guru is relatively accessible, charming, and even fun. All dreams are
realizable-even wonderful possibilities beyond one‘s ken." (p.78)
"A particular form of seduction that the group participates in with those flirting
with joining is similar to sexual conquest. The group pours an enormous amount of
focused energy and attention into potential recruits until they surrender to the
group‘s authority, which of course has the guru and his belief system at its center.
When someone does surrender, everyone celebrates the new bonding. This is a bit
like a new marriage, and for the recruit, it is the honeymoon phase. This lasts as
long as it does, and then the focus of the group shifts elsewhere. (This also happens
in romantic love, for after the conquest the wooer‘s interest and focus often move
somewhere else.) When the honeymoon is over, the new converts must shift roles –
from being the wooed to being the wooer." (p.79)
"But a cult in decline has more trouble selling itself. . . Members and the guru
become withdrawn and the focus gets more internal, insular, and isolating. . . The
fun is over. The rewards are now put into the distant future (including future lives)
and are achievable only through hard work. This not only keeps disciples busy and
distracted, but it is necessary because the flow of resources that came with
expansion has greatly diminished. This glorification of work always involves
improving the leader‘s property (the commune or ashram), increasing his wealth, or
some other grandiose project." (p82)
"People are especially vulnerable to charismatic leaders during times of crisis or
major life change." (p.87)
I wondered whether this was applicable to me. I was definitely in a
period of transition. I had gone through a difficult time with Rita; we
were back together, although she was still spending large amounts of time
in London whilst I was in India.
"People don‘t want a second-rate guru; they want the one who seems the best. Since
purity is the standard measurement – the gold or Greenwich meridian time of the
217
 SECOND CHANCE

guru world – each guru has to claim the most superlative traits. This is naturally a
breeding ground for hypocrisy, lies, and the cultivation of false images of purity.
Gurus are thus forced to assume the role of the highest, best, the most enlightened,
the most loving, the most selfless, the purest representative of the most profound
truths; for if they did not, people would go to one who does. Consequently, it is
largely impossible for a guru to permit himself real intimacy, which in adults
requires a context of equality. All his relationships must be hierarchical, since that
is the foundation of his attraction and power." (p.88)
This was an argument for why Guru‟s claimed to be pure, but then I
wondered what if they really were enlightened and self-realised. If this
was the case then they would be pure. But, even if it were so, I could see
that the entire structure could easily lend itself to abuses.
"Since adulation from any one person eventually becomes boring, gurus do not need
any specific disciple – they need lots of them. Gurus do give special attention to
those with wealth and power." (p.89)
"Gurus likewise do many things to ensure that their disciples‘ prime emotional
allegiance is toward them. In the realm of sexuality, the two prevalent ways control
is exerted are through promulgating either celibacy or promiscuity. Although
seemingly opposite, both serve the same function: they minimize the possibilities of
people bonding deeply with each other, thus reducing factors that compete with the
guru for attention." (p.92)
". . . sex scandals go with the occupation of the guru because of its [the position‘s]
emotional isolation and eventual boredom. Disciples are just there to serve and
amuse the guru who, after all, gives them so much. The guru‘s temptation is
exacerbated by the deep conditioning in many women to be attracted to men in
power." (p.93)
There were rumours of odd sexual behaviour surrounding Rajneesh and
Sai Baba. However, their followers discounted these rumours as complete
fabrications.
"Gurus, like fathers, are in a context that gives them enormous power because of
their disciples‘ needs, trust, and dependency. One reason incest is a betrayal of trust
is what a daughter needs from her father is a sense of self-worth not specifically
linked to her sexuality. Sex with the guru is similarly incestuous because a guru
ostensibly functions as a spiritual father to whom one‘s growth is entrusted. Having
sex with a parental figure reinforces using sex for power. This is not what young
women (or men) need for their development. When the guru drops them, which
eventually he does, feelings of shame and betrayal usually result that leave deep
scars." (p.94)
"Fostering promiscuity, impersonal sex, and interchangeable sexual partners
accomplishes the same agenda as celibacy. It trivializes sexual attraction and
undermines coupling. Casual, disconnected, modular sex eventually leaves people
218
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

satiated, jaded, and often hurt. They become fearful of forming deep relationships,
which fits neatly into the guru‘s need to have disciples detached from everything but
him." (p.99)
"Many gurus and spiritual authorities negate, make light of, or even ridicule the
use and value of Western psychotherapy because its concepts of the unconscious
undermine their authority and power. To acknowledge that unconscious factors may
be operative in oneself means that one cannot be totally sure one is selfless."
(p.102)
"A primary goal in therapy is to free clients from their need to transfer unresolved
issues onto others. This need makes people particularly susceptible to authoritarian
control. Good therapists aim at being very conscious of how they deal with
transference.
Because of the nature of the relationship which demands total surrender, gurus do
exactly the opposite. They cultivate and reward transference, for a parental type of
authority is at the very core of the guru‘s power over disciples. The power to name,
arrange marriages, and dictate duties and behavior are ultimates in parental
authority, especially in traditional societies like the East. To give someone the
power to name or marry you is to profoundly accept their parental role in defining
who you are. The ostensible motivation behind this has to do with an attempt to
break the ties of the past so the person can become ‗new.‘ A deeper reason is that
this aids the guru in becoming the center of the person‘s emotional life, which
facilitates surrender." (p.105)
This was true; I know that Rupert was very aware of the possibility of
transference when he was seeing me, during my therapy days. I could see
that Rupert could easily have moved himself into a position of abuse
towards me, as for a while, I had totally trusted him. This was exactly the
same point that Masson had made in his book on „Against Therapy‟
which I had found so insightful at the time. It had not occurred to me
that a Guru could end up manipulating me. This whole concept was
totally dependent on the Guru, truly being self realized and ego free, not
having any ulterior motives.
"The person most at risk of being strangled by the images demanded by the role of
the guru is the guru. This includes the great danger of emotional isolation. . . At
the heart of the ultimate trap is building and becoming attached to the image of
oneself as having arrived at a state where self-delusion is no longer possible. This is
the most treacherous form of self-delusion and a veritable breeding ground of
hypocrisy and deception. It creates a feedback-proof system where the guru always
needs to be right and cannot be open to being shown wrong – which is where
learning comes from." (p.107)
"Successful gurus, rock stars, charismatic leaders of any sort, experience the
intensity of adulation amplified beyond most people‘s ken. This can make ordinary
219
 SECOND CHANCE

relationships pale by comparison. Being the recipient of such adulation and

devotion is exceedingly addictive. Here addiction is used in its loose sense to mean
mechanically needing an on-going ‗fix‘ of adulation to where it becomes the central
focus of one‘s life. Adulation has powerful emotions for the sender as well, and can
be easily mistaken for love. It is likewise addicting for the sender, as it is an easy
route to feelings of passion. Since adulation is totally a function of image, should
the images crack, adulation disappears, demonstrating that it is essentially empty of
real care." (p.112)
"As long as [people] have unlivable ideals, they can be manipulated." (p.156)‘
This whole document had really got me thinking and wondering about
what I had seen and experienced. This book was claiming that it was
ultimately a very elaborate con, but a con nonetheless. Could it really be
just a con, I was sure that I had felt something.
A few days later a book arrived by FedEx, it was from Rita, „Combating
Cult Mind Control‟ by Steven Hassan. This book had been quoted in one
of the earlier articles. Inside the front cover, Rita had written „Please read
this book, I love you very much‟.
The book cover claimed that it was „The #1 Best-selling Guide to
Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults‟. I wondered
what, if anything, I could possibly gain from reading this book. I soon
realized why Rita had sent it to me. Stephen Hassan wrote:
‗Imagine, if you will, the following scenes. Saffron-robed men on street corners
dancing and chanting with cymbals and drums. Bedraggled teenagers running from
car to car selling flowers in the pouring rain. Over nine hundred people – men,
women, and children; white and black – lying face down in the mud at Jonestown,
Guyana.
Mention cults to somebody and these are the images you‘ll evoke. Yet these images
do not represent the overall destructive cult phenomenon as it has become today.
Imagine a different set of images. Business executives in three-piece suits sitting in
hotel ballrooms for company sponsored ―awareness‖ training, unable to get up to go
to the bathroom. Housewives attending ―psyche-up rallies‖ so they can recruit
friends and neighbours into a pyramid sales organization. Hundreds of students
gathering at an accredited university being told they can levitate and ―fly‖ through
the air if they only meditate hard enough. High-school students practicing satanic
rituals involving blood and urine, directed by an older leader who claims he will
develop their personal power. Hundreds of people of every description paying huge
sums to learn cosmic truths from a ‗channelled spirit‘.
These are some of the forms that destructive cult phenomenon is taking today.
Do you know anyone who has undergone a radical personality change because of an
involvement with such a group? The odds are that someone you know – someone in
your family, one of your friends, someone from work or school – has been affected
220
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

by contact with a destructive cult. If not, it is probably just a matter of time before
it happens.
Destructive cults have mushroomed over the past twenty years. It is estimated that
there are over three thousand destructive cults in the United States, some are large,
some are small, some are rich, and some are poor. Some are more dangerous than
others.
All destructive cults believe that the ends justify the means; they believe themselves
to be above the law. As long as they believe what they are doing is ―right‖ and
―just‖, many of them think nothing of lying, stealing, cheating, or unethically using
mind control to accomplish their ends. They violate, in the most profound and
fundamental way, the civil liberties of the people they recruit. They turn
unsuspecting people into slaves.
There are four main types of cults. Religious cults are the best known and most
numerous. These groups are focused on religious dogma. Some use the Bible, some
are eastern-religion based, others draw on occult lore, and some are purely
inventions of the leader. Although most claim to be of the spiritual realm, all one
has to do to see their true colors, is to examine how much emphasis is placed on the
―material‖ world – the luxurious lifestyle of the leaders, millions of dollars of real
estate, extensive business enterprises and so forth.‖
This really made me sit up and take notice. It was true that ISKCON
had become very rich and that Srila Prabhupada had lived in relatively
luxurious accommodation. Sai Baba lived in a lovely palace in
Phootapathi. Maharashi Mahesh Yogi was also believed to be quite
wealthy as were other well known gurus. The alarm bells were beginning
to ring. Stephen Hassan described other cults.
‗Political cults often make the news, usually with the word ―fringe‖ or ―extremist‖
attached, but most people do not hear about the deceptive recruitment and mind
control practices that distinguish them from run-of-the-mill fanatics. These groups
are organized around a political dogma.
Psychotherapy/educational cults hold workshops and seminars for a hundred of
dollars to provide ―insight‖ and ―enlightenment‖, usually in a hotel meeting-room
environment. These cults use many basic mind control techniques to provide
participants with a ―peak‖ experience.
Commercial cults believe in the dogma of greed. They deceive and manipulate people
to work for little or no pay in the hope of getting rich. There are many pyramid-
style or multi-level marketing organizations that promise big money but fleece their
victims. They then destroy their victims‘ self-esteem so that they will not complain.‘
He then gave his theory as to why these cults were growing, and that
people were so complacent about their threat.

221
 SECOND CHANCE

‗Accepting that unethical mind control can affect anybody challenges the age-old
philosophical notion that man is a rational being, responsible for, and in control of,
his every action. Such a world view does not allow for any concept of mind control.
Second, we all have a belief in our own invulnerability. It is too scary to think that
someone could take control of our mind. Third, influence processes start from the
moment that we are born, so it is easy to take the position that everything is mind
control. It‘s easy, then, to simply say ―Why worry about it?‖
We all need to feel that we are in control of our lives. We don‘t like feeling that
events are out of control, so we put reality into an order that makes sense to us.
When we hear that something bad has happened to someone (e.g. mugged or
raped), we usually try to find a reason to explain why that person was a victim.
Was he or she walking at the ―wrong‖ time in a ―bad‖ area? People try to ascribe
a direct cause-and-effect relationship to what happened: if something bad happened
to her, then she must have done something wrong. This kind of behaviour is called
blaming the victim. Blaming the victim plays an important psychological role in
allowing us to distance ourselves from the person who was hurt. In this way, we say
to ourselves, ―Such a thing couldn‘t happen to me because I am different. I know
better.‖ Often people look at a cult victim and say mistakenly, ―What a weak-
minded person; he must had been looking for a way to escape responsibility and
have someone control his life.‖
People believe that ―it can never happen to them‖ because they want to believe they
are stronger and better than the millions who have fallen victim to cult mind
control.”
I was definitely into this category of feeling invulnerable. I never
thought that it could happen to me. However, many of the example cases
that he gave in his book were of people who were highly intelligent, they
seemed to be the most vulnerable. I was getting worried. I was thinking
exactly like those people who felt that they were invulnerable. I wondered
how anyone could take control of someone else‟s mind.
‗What make us all so vulnerable to these influence processes? The answer lies in
the nature of the mind itself. .. It is not accidental that many destructive cults tell
their members to ―become like little children‖. Adults can easily be age-regressed to
a time when they had little or no critical facilities. As children, we were helplessly
dependent on our parents as the ultimate authority figures.‘
Anand had suggested many times for me to become child-like, so that I
could experience Reiki more fully. I wondered if it was, as Steven Hassan
was suggesting, a way of getting control of my mind. I read on.
‗The mind, despite all of its strength and ability, has weaknesses too. It is
dependent on a stream of coherent information for it to function properly. Put a
person in a sensory deprivation chamber and within hours he will start to
hallucinate and become incredibly suggestible. Likewise, put a person into a
222
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

situation where his senses are overloaded with non-coherent information, and the
mind will go ‗numb‘ as a protective mechanism. It gets confused and overwhelmed,
and critical faculties no longer work properly.
The mind needs frames of reference to structure reality. Change the frame of
reference, and the information coming in will be interpreted in a different way.
When people are subjected to a mind control process, most do not have any frame of
reference for the experience, and consequently they often accept the frame of reference
given to them by the group.‘
This was true. I had been subjected to a lot of very different
experiences. Things that I had never experienced before. Had I simply
taken the first explanation that had been offered to me? It was also true
that a lot of the explanations that I had been given by various gurus, or
what they had written in books were not coherent. They seemed to
contradict each other, and themselves. I remembered how confused I was
at reading the Srila Prabhupada‟s interviews in his book „The Science of
Self Realisation‟. It was scary to read the Swami Muktananda‟s
experiences of Shaktipat, even odder to think that something so
frightening could be for something good. Many of the arguments that I
had read and heard, from the Hindu gurus, seemed incoherent to me. I
had put it down to my lack of spiritual development. Stephen Hassan was
saying that it had nothing to do with lack of spiritual development.
Rather, it was a deliberate tactic to confuse the mind, so that it would be
more amenable to mind control.
This was a very scary thought. The next chapter was even more
disturbing, Steven Hassan was writing about specific techniques for mind
control; the difference between mind control and brain washing, and
about hypnosis.
‗In popular discussions of the subject, the term ―brainwashing‖ is often used as a
synonym for ―mind control‖. In actuality, though, the two processes are quite
different and should not be confused. Mind control is not brainwashing.
Brainwashing is effective in producing compliance to demands, such as signing a
false confession or denouncing one‘s government. People are coerced into specific acts
for self-preservation, and once they have acted, their beliefs change to rationalize
what they have. But these beliefs are usually not well internalized.
Mind control, also called ―thought reform‖, is more subtle and sophisticated. Its
perpetrators are regarded as friends or peers, so the person is much less defensive.
He unwittingly participates by co-operating with his controllers and giving them
private information that he does not know will be used against him. The new belief
system is internalized into a new identity structure.
Mind control involves little or no overt physical abuse. Instead, hypnotic processes
are combined with group dynamics to create a potent indoctrination effect. The
223
 SECOND CHANCE

individual is deceived and manipulated – not directly threatened – into making the
prescribed choices. On the whole, he responds positively to what is done to him.
The central feature of hypnotism is the trance. People who are hypnotized enter a
trance like state which is fundamentally different from normal consciousness. In
normal consciousness the attention is focused outwards through the five senses, in a
trance one‘s attention is focused inwards. One is hearing, seeing and feeling
internally.
Hypnotism relates to the unethical mind control of destructive cults in a variety of
ways. In many cults what is often called ―meditation‖ is no more than a process by
which cult members enter a trance, during which they receive suggestions which
make them more receptive to following the cult‘s doctrine. Being in a trance is
usually a pleasant, relaxing experience, so that people wish to re-enter the trance as
often as possible. Most importantly, it has been clinically established by
psychological researchers that people‘s critical faculties are diminished in the trance
state. One is less able to evaluate information received in a trance than when in a
normal state of consciousness.‘
I thought back to my days of Reiki meditation. I had fallen asleep many
times during the meditation. I had felt very relaxed and peaceful. It did
seem to have the characteristics of self-hypnosis that were described by
Steven Hassan. I wondered, if as a result of those sessions I had been
pre-disposed to seeing auras and the like, had I just self imagined those
things? When Anand had healed various people, I wondered whether he
had simply hypnotized them into believing that they were cured. But,
then I remembered the strange vision that I had when I had entered
Rita‟s dream, Rita had experienced the same thing. She was in London
and I was on a plane heading for Delhi. Whereas I may have been
hypnotized, there was no way that she had been. I might agree with
Steven Hassan that I had been under some kind of self hypnosis, but
what I had experienced in that state wasn‟t necessarily all auto suggestion,
there was something happening.
All this meditation, mantras and astrology had appeared to be so
harmless at first. I was beginning to realize that there was something
more powerful at work, something that I did not understand. I also
realized that I was going to find it difficult to get the truth from a Guru.
They could all potentially be in a position where they are abusing their
spiritual knowledge to manipulate others. There seemed to be strong
evidence suggesting that Maharashi Mahesh had done this with
Transcendental Meditation. Was the same true of Yogananada
Parhamansa with Kriya Yoga, Swami Muktananda and Sidhi Yoga and
Srila Prabhupada and Krishna Bhakti Yoga? I no longer felt sure whether
to categorically say yes or no.
I read on, to find out what specific techniques were being used to
perform mind control, so as to avoid them in the future. I had the feeling
224
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

that I had been exposed to these techniques, but had not been totally
sucked in, more by luck than by design.
‗The political experience of World War II, in which thousands of apparently
normal people were involved in projects such as the operation of concentration
camps, where millions of Jews and others were killed, provoked considerable interest
among psychologists. How was it that people who had led ordinary lives prior to
Adolf Hitler‘s rise to power in Germany became involved in deliberate attempt to
exterminate a whole group of people? Thousands of social psychological experiments
have been conducted since World War II, yielding great insights into the various
ways people are influenced, both as groups, and as individuals.
There are four components of mind control: control of behaviour, control of
thoughts, control of emotions and control of information.
Behaviour control is the regulation of an individual‘s physical reality. It includes
the control of his environment – where he lives, what clothing he wears, what food
he eats, how much sleep he gets – as well as of the jobs, rituals, and other actions
he performs.
This need for behaviour control is the reason more cults prescribe a very rigid
schedule for their members. Each day a significant amount of time is devoted to cult
rituals and indoctrination activities. Members are also typically assigned to
accomplish specific goals and tasks, thus restricting their free time and their
behaviour. In destructive cults there is always something to do.
In some of the more restrictive groups, members have to ask permission from
leaders to do almost anything. Behavior is often controlled by the requirement that
everyone act as a group. The chain of command in cults is usually authoritarian,
flowing from the leader through his lieutenants to their sub-leaders. All behaviours
are either rewarded or punished.
The leaders cannot command someone‘s inner thoughts, but they know that if they
command behaviour, hearts and minds will follow.
Thought control, the second major component of mind control, includes
indoctrinating members so thoroughly that they internalize the group doctrine,
incorporate a new language system, and use thought stopping techniques to keep
their mind ‗centered‘.
In totalistic cults, the ideology is internalized as ‗the truth‘, the only ‗map‘ of
reality.
All that is good is embodied in the leader and the group. All that is bad is on the
outside. The more totalistic groups claim that their doctrine is scientifically proven.
The doctrine claims to answer all questions to all problems and situations. A
member need not think for himself because the doctrine does the thinking for him.‘

225
 SECOND CHANCE

This was astonishing. So many of the gurus that I had come across were
using the word „scientific‟, and all of them were claiming that their way
was the best, or most correct way. I had come across the very things that
Steven Hassan was warning against. I wondered about the statement: „A
member need not think for himself because the doctrine does the thinking for him.‘ Is
this, what happens to the people who are followers of these gurus? Is this
what would have happened to me, if I had carried on with
Transcendental Meditation? I kept on reading.
‗A destructive cult typically has its own ―loaded language‖ of words and
expressions. Since language provides the symbols we use for thinking, controlling
certain words helps to control thoughts. Many groups condense complex situations,
label them, and thereby reduce them to cult clichés. This label, which is how the
loaded language is verbally expressed, governs how one thinks in any situation.
The language helps to make members feel special and separates them from the
general public. It also serves to confuse newcomers, who want to understand what
members are talking about; they start to study hard in order to ―understand‖ the
truth. In reality, by incorporating the loaded language they learn how not to think.
Another key aspect of thought control involves training members to block out
information which is critical of the group. Critical words have been explained away
in advance as ―the lies about us that Satan puts in peoples‘ minds‖ or ―the lies
that the World Conspiracy prints in the news media to discredit us, because they
know we‘re onto them‖. Paradoxically, criticism of the group confirms that the
cult‘s view of the world is correct.
Perhaps the most widely used and effective way to control thoughts is through
thought stopping rituals. Different groups use different techniques: concentrated
praying, chanting aloud or silently, meditating, ―speaking in tongues‖, singing, or
humming. These actions, many of them ordinarily useful and valuable, are
perverted in destructive cults.
Third, emotional control, attempts to manipulate and narrow the range of a
person‘s feeling. Guilt and fear are necessary tools to keep people in control. Guilt
is often used; cult members are conditioned to blame themselves, so that they can
respond gratefully whenever a leader points out one of their ―shortcomings‖.
Fear consists of the fear of the outside enemy that is persecuting you and the second,
is the terror of discovery and punishment by the leaders. Members are not allowed
to feel or express negative emotions, except toward outsiders. They are never to
criticize a leader, but criticize themselves instead.
People are kept off balance, praised one minute and tongue lashed the next.
Confession of past sins or wrong attitudes is a powerful device for emotional control,
too. Once you have publicly confessed, rarely is your old sin forgiven in the true
sense – or forgotten. Anything you say can, and will be, used against you.

226
 CULTS & MIND CONTROL

Last, information control, in many totalistic cults, people have minimal access to
non-cult newspapers, magazines, TV, and radio. This is partly because they are
kept so busy they don‘t have free time. When they do read, it is primarily cult-
generated propaganda or material that has been censored to ―help‖ members stay
focused.
New converts are not permitted to talk to each other, without an older member
present to chaperone them. Most importantly, people are told to avoid contact with
ex-members or critics. Those who could provide the most information are the ones
especially to be shunned.
Information is usually compartmentalized to keep members from knowing the big
picture. Cult members naturally feel that they know more about what‘s going on in
their group than outsiders do, but in counselling ex-members I find they often know
the least.
Destructive organizations also control information by having many levels of
―truth‖. Cult ideologies have ―outsider‖ doctrines and ―insider‖ doctrines. For
example, the Moonies always said publicly that they were pro-American, pro-
democracy and pro-family. Insiders knew what this really meant, they believed that
the best thing for America was to be under the total control of their leader Moon,
that the best form of democracy was control by the unification control and that the
best family was the ‗spiritual‘ family with Moon as the father and not one‘s
natural family.
A member can sincerely believe that the outer doctrines are not lies but just a
different level of truth. By creating an environment where truth is multi-leveled, cult
directors make it nearly impossible for a person to make final, objective
assessments. If he has problems, he is told that he‘s not mature enough to know the
whole truth but that all will become clear shortly.
A cult member is told that if he works hard, he‘ll earn the right to learn the higher
levels of truth.
There are usually many ―inner levels‖. Often an advanced member who thinks he
knows it all is still several layers away from the center.
I had found this multi-tiered truth in Transcendental Meditation. They
were saying that it had nothing to do with religion in their recruitment
material in the US, whereas in reality it was to do with chanting the names
of Hindu gods. I wondered how much Vishnu had known about the
Maharashi Mahesh Yogi and the various problems that he had with the
other Sankracharyas, and about the poisoning of Guru Dev. There
seemed to be a lot of truth in all that Steven Hassan was saying.
After reading all of this, I was not sure whether I could be sure of
anything that I had been told by Anand and by the other gurus. But I did
feel that there was something in what they were saying. I reasoned that
the core of the Vedas and Bhagavad Gita was the divinely inspired word
227
 SECOND CHANCE

of God. But the problems and differences between ISKCON, Maharashi

Mahesh, Yogananda Parahamansa, Swami Muktananda and Reiki lay in
their „coloured‟ interpretation of those scriptures. All of them had their
own exclusive views on how things should be, separate and distinct
organizations, specialized rituals and dogmatic doctrines. All of which
were different from one another. I felt that this was the problem,
somewhere they had gone off on a bit of a tangent leading to some weird
behaviour.
All of the gurus had quoted the Vedas. All of them claimed that they
were the true scriptures, inspired and handed down by God, directly to
mankind. That night I decided that I should go and read the very
scriptures that they were all quoting, and see whether I could determine
from the scriptures as to which of the gurus was right.

228
 16 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT
INDIAN HISTORY

I started looking for the scriptures mentioned by the Gurus: the Vedas
and the Upanishads. There were many books on the Vedas and the
Upanishads, but they were all commentaries, taking a passage here and a
passage there. Sometimes there would be no references whatsoever. I
found that one book on the Veda would disagree with another book. It
seemed that there were many, many different interpretations.
I was inspired by Srila Prabhupada‟s work on the Bhagavad Gita As it
Is, in that book he had written down the original Sanskrit, a
transliteration of the Sanskrit, a word for word translation into English, a
summary translation and finally a commentary on how to interpret that
verse. I wanted to find a similar version of the Vedas and Upansishads,
the original Sanskrit and a literal English translation. I had found a
version of the Vedas that had the Sanskrit and the Hindi at the Vidyapith
Bookstore at the opposite end of Marine Drive. There the man in the
book shop gave me the address of a bookstore in Varanasi,
Chaukhambha Sanskrit Bhawam (Sanskrit Ayurveda, Indological
Publishers and Distributor, Chowk opposite Chitra Cinema) that would
have the book that I was looking for.
For a while I had been longing to go to Varanasi. It had captured my
imagination when I was reading an article in the Jet Magazine on one of
my flights around India. This what it said:
„Varanasi (Population 1.03million) is situated on the West bank of the
River Ganges. India‟s most sacred city, it was probably already an
important town by the 7th century BC when Babylon and Nineveh were
at the peak of their power. The Buddha came to it in 500BC and it was
mentioned both in the Mahabharata and Ramayana. Banares is a
corruption of Varanasi. It is also called Kashi („The City of Light‟) by
229
 SECOND CHANCE

Hindus. It is one of the seven sacred cities of Hinduism. Each year well
over 1 million pilgrims visit it while about 50,000 Brahmins are residents.
Varanasi is said to combine all the virtues of all other places of
pilgrimage, and anyone dying within the area marked by the Panch Kosi
road is transported straight to heaven. Some devout Hindus move to
Varanasi to end their days and have their ashes scattered in the Holy
Ganges.‟
I made plans to go to Varanasi. Luckily it had an airport, but there were
no direct flights from Mumbai, I had to go via Delhi. It was a bright
sunny morning when I landed at Varanasi airport. A man, from the Taj
Group of Hotels, was standing near the baggage collection belt holding a
placard with my name on it. I was glad he was there. I would not have to
fight away the local taxi drivers and get into the usual haggling process of
how much it was going to cost me. I sat in the air conditioned Tata
Sumo, the Indian version of the British Range Rover and American Jeep
Cherokee. We drove for 40 minutes past fields and villages. I hadn‟t
realised that the airport was quite a distance from the city.
It was with great expectancy that I arrived in the city of Varanasi.
Countless books had described the beauty and spirituality of this place.
Many had come, and would come in the future to pass their last days on
this earth in Varanasi. Some believed that by dying here one would reach
„moksha‟, a oneness with the Parama atma, the Supreme Spirit. What kind
of magical place this must be for people to entertain such thoughts!
I expected to see many temples with beautiful carved spires, with
flowers everywhere. I expected to be surrounded by incense fragrances
wafting through the air. I expected to be surrounded by the rhythmic
chants of maha mantras, harmoniously accompanied by bells, drums and
trumpet blasts. I expected to see many people serene, unburdened by the
cares of the world, at one with the cosmic universe.
What I saw were congested streets with decrepit buildings, and cow
excrement splattered all over the walkways. All I could smell was the
petrol fumes of the auto rickshaws and motorbikes. All I could hear was
the constant blaring of car, bike and rickshaw horns. There were
thousands of people all wanting to sell you something; a sari, a puja, a
funeral, a boat ride, a garland, some Ganges water, a metal memento, a
tour guide, a postcard. Then there were all the poor, the lepers, the holy
men and the pick pockets.
I later heard that one of the priests who performs the last funeral rites
charges Rs50,000 that‟s over $1000. This is in a country where the
average monthly wage in a city is Rs3,500. If you can‟t pay he‟s not
interested. With over a hundred funerals a day that is a lot of money.
Perhaps the Ghats, the stone steps leading to the sacred waters of the
Ganges would be different. The concierge and the hotel had told me that
I would need to go with a guide. He told me that it would be very
230
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

crowded and that I would need someone to show me how to get to the
Ghats. I also gave him the address of the bookshop, he told me that he
knew where the Chitra Cinema was, and that the bookshop would be
around that area.
In the afternoon the guide took me into the city, heading firstly for the
Ghats, then on to the book store. The streets were narrow and there
were hundreds of people. On the right side they were all swarming
towards the river and on the left side they were heading back from the
river. Despite walking briskly I was constantly being pushed and jostled
along, this was not the serenity and peace that I had been expecting.
Suddenly there was a lot of shouting ahead. A couple of angry youths
came running out, shouting, and waving their hands. The guide pulled me
out of the way to one side. A group of forty equally angry youths came
running behind, they were also waving their hands and shouting.
Everyone was getting out of their way. The men in the centre were
carrying something on their shoulders draped in a white cloth. A moment
later a police car with wailing sirens pushed its way through the crowds.
„What was all that about‟
„Two days ago fourteen people were drowned when their boat sank in
the Ganges.‟
„How many in the boat?‟
„There were 28 people in the boat; it started to let in water.‟
„Isn‟t that too many?‟
„Yes, the boats can carry 15 people at the most, it‟s a tragedy – what‟s
worse is that they were all Muslim boys. They are angry because they are
blaming the Hindu river police and other Hindus for not doing anything
to save them.‟
„What were so many people doing in such a small boat?‟
„They were going to the other side for kite flying. So they were away
from the main boats and crowds. Sir, you better be careful. The trouble
can flare up at any time.‟ He was referring to the potential of riots
between Hindus and Muslims, a fairly common occurrence in India.
Was this the same place that so many writers had written about? Where
was the beauty, the peace, that would attract so many people to come and
spend their last days in such a place? Perhaps I had been unlucky with the
timing. The river bank was packed with people, there were some in boats
on the river, and some were doing their prayers, others washing their
clothes. The sun was about to set. The dying rays of the sun gave a
surreal lighting to the whole scenery, as if the whole of Varanasi was
about to gently dissolve away. There was something unreal about the
place.
My guide was keen that I hire a boat so that I could have a better view
of the Ghats and the many historic buildings that were along the
riverside. I politely declined. I was here to find a translation of the Vedas
231
 SECOND CHANCE

that would unlock mystical secrets, and answer my many questions. I

showed him the address of the bookshop. He beckoned me to follow
him. The guide walked quickly, heading away from the river bank back to
the city centre. I found it difficult to keep up with him as we were
walking against the general movement of people, who were trying to get
to the river bank. The guide stopped, waiting for me to catch up. He
smiled at me. Evidently I wasn‟t the first „gringo‟ to find it difficult to
keep up.
He was soon darting into tiny little streets which were also filled with
people. We soon found ourselves in what seemed to be an endless
labyrinthine bazaar with little pathways a few feet wide with shops on
both sides. The shop owners had a large proportion of their goods laid
out on the path, making the pathway even narrower. There were all kinds
of shops, all of which seemed to be very busy. By now I was getting
nervous that I might lose the guide. I remembered how Theseus had
gone into the labyrinth, at Crete, unravelling a ball of string; so that he
could find his way back, as he went along hunting the fire breathing
Minotaur. I wished I had brought my ball of string. My guide saw that I
was having trouble keeping up. He stopped every five minutes allowing
me to catch up. I didn‟t need the ball of string after all. We must have
walked for about forty minutes through these winding narrow alley ways,
before coming back to a wide road way. There in front of me was the
Chitra Cinema. The guide looked at the address, once again, and then
went to ask someone where it was. The man pointed to a shop just a little
further along.
We had arrived at the „Chaukhambha Sanskrit Bhawan‟. The shop was
about ten feet wide and about thirty feet long. The whole of the front was
open to the street. On each side of the shop there were large bookcases
filled with books. In the middle of the shop there was a ladder going up
to the roof. Young boys occasionally popped their heads through the
roof and handed books to the men sitting below. In the middle of the
shop there were white cotton covered mattresses. Customers were sitting
on these mattresses being served by shop attendants.
„Please Sir come in‟ said one of the attendants. He pointed to my shoes,
indicating that I ought to remove my shoes, so that I could sit
comfortably on the mattress. I took my shoes of, and the attendant took
me to a vacant spot about half way down the shop, quite close to the
ladder going up to the roof. The mattress was quite soft and comfortable,
it was the first time that I had gone to a book shop like this.
As soon as I sat down, another attendant came and sat before me. He
started to speak in Hindi. I indicated that I would prefer talking in
English.
„Yes Sir. How can I help you?‟ he asked, smiling broadly.

232
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

„I am looking for a literal translation of the Vedas. I want a book which

has a verse of Sanskrit, followed by a literal translation in English.‟
„Yes Sir. Which Vedas are you looking for?‟
„What do you mean which Vedas?‟
„There are four main Vedas, the Rig Veda, Auyur Veda, Sama Veda and
Artha Veda. The Rig Veda is the main one. We have translations for all of
them. The best translation that is available is by Prof HH Wilson. He has
also translated the commentary of Sayana Acharya who lived in the latter
half of the 14th century. His commentary is the most respected.‟
The man spoke very quickly. I was trying to absorb everything that he
was saying. It didn‟t mean much to me.
„Can I see a copy?‟ that was the safest response.
The man shouted something in Hindi to one of the boys, whose head
was popping out of the whole in the roof, above the ladder.
„Most people also like to buy a copy of the Upanishads. Our most
popular copy is that translated by Swami Gambhirananda which includes
a commentary by the great Sankaracharya. Would you like to see that to?‟
I nodded my head in agreement. Again the man shouted to another boy
to get the Upanishads. A little while later the Rig Vedas and the
Upanishads appeared.
„The Rig Veda is in four volumes. 450 rupees each or 1800 rupees for
the set.‟
„There is no discount if I buy all four volumes?‟ I asked.
„No sir. This is already a very good price,‟ replied the man.
I took one of the hardback volumes and went to a page at random. It
was exactly what I was looking for. The Sanskrit verse was there,
followed by a translation into English with a very short commentary. I
was more interested in the translation than someone else‟s commentary.
The two volume set of the Upanishads also had the Sanskrit, as well as,
the English translation but a longer commentary. I picked up each of the
volumes and gingerly leafed through them. I was holding the ancient
knowledge, the secrets of God in my hands. I was excited.
„I‟ll take all of them‟ I told the man.
„Yes Sir. A very wise choice. I will have them wrapped. That is 1950
rupees altogether for the Vedas and the Upanishads.
I gave him the money and walked back to the hotel, with the guide,
eager to get back into my room and to start reading the secrets of the
universe.
I started to read the Rig Veda. I was surprised to discover that it was
not one hymn, but 1,028 hymns grouped into ten books, a total of 10,552
verses. I had given up within fifteen minutes of reading it. It was all very
obscure and seemed so disjointed, the English also seemed to be very
strange. I looked at the cover of the book and realised that Professor HH
Wilson had worked on the translation between 1850 and 1888. This was
233
 SECOND CHANCE

not what I had expected; the Vedas were so impenetrable and cryptic. I
went to sleep, disappointed that I had hit another brick wall.
The next morning I checked out early, eager to get back to Mumbai. I
had a few minutes left waiting for the car to take me to the airport. There
was a bookstore in the hotel; I went in, just to pass the time. There I saw
„The Rig Veda‟ translated by Wendy O‟Flaherty, produced by Penguin
classics. I skimmed through the introduction:
‗..there is so much in the Rig Veda to interest and excite non-Vedists; it seems a
shame to let it go on being the treasure of a tiny, exclusive group, hidden as it is
behind the thorny wall of an ancient and cryptic language. .. In many places, a
difficult idea is couched in simple language; in others, a simple idea is obscured by
difficult language. Several hymns are simple to translate, but impossible to
understand. … The riddles in the Rig Veda are particularly maddening because
many of them are Looking Glass riddles (―Why is a raven like a writing desk?‖):
they do not have, nor are they meant to have answers. They are not merely
rhetorical, but are designed to present one half of a Socratic dialogue through which
the reader becomes aware of the inadequacy of his certain knowledge…Sometimes
the Rig Veda poet slips from the present to the past in the traditional way,
collapsing the mythical past and ritual present together. But sometimes the poet
deliberately invokes or highlights a paradox of time: Aditi gave birth to Daksha,
and Daksha gave birth to Aditi. These cognitive paradoxes, underscored by
grammatical inconsistencies in tense, draw the reader into a timeless world of myth
and ritual….
… In places the metaphors are incomplete or jagged, the language elliptic or dense.
… Another form of deliberate confusion is the use of mutually illuminating
metaphors. Certain concerns recur throughout the Rig Veda: the themes of
harnessing and unharnessing (yoking cattle, controlling powers), which shift in their
positive or negative value (sometimes harnessing is bad, sometimes it is good). There
are many problems in interpreting metaphors. It is not clear which is in the
foreground and which is in the background. For example, in a particular hymn are
the cows symbolic of the sun, or is the sun a metaphor for the cows? The careless
translator/commentator can easily find himself seeing and interpreting symbolism
everywhere. ..
… There is yet another, related ambiguity which will plague the reader of this
translation, and one that I cannot resolve. Some of the poetry works as poetry even
in English; some of it does not. There are places where the complex ritual
vocabulary or highly abstract philosophical arguments interfere with the power of
the poetry. ..
..Perhaps the single factor that tends to interfere most with the poetry throughout
the Rig Veda is the fragmentary quality of the work. Not only is each of the 1028
hymns a separate statement, but each of the 10,552 verses stands on its own and
often bears no obvious relationship with the verses immediately preceding and
234
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

following it; indeed each line of a two line verse – and sometimes each half-line –
may contain a thought not only grammatically distinct from what surrounds it but
different in tone, imagery, and reference. This discontinuity – which is , ironically,
the one continuous thread in the Rig Veda, the one universal semantic feature –
tends to produce a kind of poetry that can be overpowering in the intensity of the
separate forces that it juxtaposes but disconcerting to anyone looking for a
sustained mood.‘
Wendy O‟Flaherty was saying that the Rig Veda is written in a way that
makes it extremely difficult to understand and interpret. I took heart with
this comment. There was not something intrinsically wrong with my
inability to understand the Rig Veda. I then wondered that if it was so
difficult to understand, then how can anyone be sure that they have
understood it? The book was only 250 rupees, I bought it. Perhaps it
could shed some light on the other volumes that I had bought.
I tried to read some of the Vedas on the plane but I soon became
frustrated. I just could not understand it. Many times, over the next
several weeks, I picked up the Vedas and tried to understand what I was
reading. Each time, the attempt ended in failure. I had thought that it
would be a simple task of going through the Vedas and checking which
of the gurus‟ teaching was correct. But understanding the Vedas in the
first place was proving to be insurmountable.
It was time to take a break. Rita had taken a few weeks of and was
flying to India. I had booked a week at the Vanyavilas hotel just outside
the tiger reserve at Ranthambore. In the morning we would go into the
tiger reserve and see the wildlife. Several times we saw glimpses of tigers,
which tended to be very shy of the open land rovers. In the afternoon
Rita and I would relax in the palatial hotel grounds. I had brought the
Vedas along with me in anticipation that perhaps a change in scenery may
aide my ability to unravel the meaning behind these cryptic texts. The
hotel had an extremely well stocked library where I would go to read,
whilst Rita went for a series of exotic de-toxing ayurvedic body massages.
I was the only one sitting in the library. Occasionally one of the staff
would come around and ask whether I wanted anything to eat or drink. I
was in deep concentration, trying to make sense of the Vedas.
„Is that the Vedas you‟re reading?‟
I was quite startled. I hadn‟t notice that someone else had come into the
room and had sat down in the leather armchair opposite me.
„I‟m sorry, what was that?‟ I asked, looking up.
„Is that the Vedas that you‟re reading?‟ asked the stranger. He was a thin
man dressed in a pair of khaki pants, and a pale cream shirt. He was in his
fifties. He had lost most of his hair, and was clean shaven. He was
wearing a pair of round metallic rimmed glasses. He looked very
scholarly.
„Yes it is the Vedas,‟ I replied.
235
 SECOND CHANCE

„I‟m sorry that I made you jump. It‟s very unusual to find anyone
reading the Vedas these days, and especially someone quite so young,‟ he
explained.
I hadn‟t regarded myself as being especially young. Perhaps this stranger
was a lot older than I had thought.
„Are you making any sense of it?‟ he continued.
„No. I am finding it very difficult to get to grips with it.‟ I paused
briefly, the stranger smiled at me. „My name is Arjuna. I‟m pleased to
meet you.‟ I got up and extended my arm to shake the stranger‟s hand.
„My name is PD Chandra,‟ Mr Chandra took hold of my hand and gave
it a warm friendly shake.
„I haven‟t met anyone who has read the Rig Veda. Now I know why,‟ I
smiled.
„Yes, Arjuna. Very few have read the Rig Veda, and even fewer have
understood it. I used to lecture in Ancient Indian History and Sanskrit at
the Sanskrit College, Calcutta University,‟ replied Mr Chandra.
This was extraordinary luck. It was too much of a bizarre coincidence. I
wondered whether he would help me understand the Rig Veda.
„Mr Chandra, do you have the time and the patience to explain the Rig
Veda to me?‟ I asked.
The professor smiled.
„I always like to explain things to those students who are hungry to
know. I am here with my son and his family. They like to be out in this
hot sun, surrounded by jungle and wild animals. I prefer to be in the cool,
surrounded by friendly leather bound books,‟ he smiled. „Shall we begin?‟
he asked.
„Yes we can. But first can I offer you something to drink, a tea, coffee
or something stronger?‟ I asked.
He seemed to be more excited at the prospect of having a student, than
I was at the prospect of having a Professor. I ordered some coffee for the
two of us and same paper and a pen, so that I could take some notes.
„Now Arjuna, the first thing to know is the historical context of the
Vedas and other Indian scriptures. It will help you understand who wrote
them, and for what purpose they were written. That is a key part in
understanding the Vedas and other Vedic literature.‟
„I agree. But even on this point there seems to be a very wide variation
in when the Vedas were written. In the introduction that I am reading, it
says that the Western historians put a date to the Vedas at somewhere
between 1500 to 1000BC, but it says that the Western historians are way
off and that the Vedas may be even older than 5000BC. That is a big
difference.‟
„Yes Arjuna, you are correct. There are many controversies around
when the Vedas were written, and even when Indian history started. Most
people agree that there were two races that are said to have inhabited the
236
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

Indian sub-continent; the Dravidians and the Aryans. There is also

agreement that the Dravidians came first then the Aryans. However there
are many conflicting theories as to the origin of the Dravidians and the
Aryans. Are you with me Arjuna?‟ asked Professor Chandra.
„Yes I am following you. But how can you be sure that the Dravidians
came before the Aryans?‟ I replied.
„Ah! That is where the Rig Veda helps us. We know that the Aryans
were a fair skinned race, and that the Dravidians were dark skinned. We
also know that it was the Aryans that wrote the Vedas. On these points
the vast majority of historians are in agreement. In the Rig Veda, the first
book, hymn 103, you will find a reference to the battle between the
Aryans and the dark skinned Dasyus. Please look it up.‟
I opened up the first book of the Vedas and turned the pages to hymn
103. I showed it to the Professor.
„Yes here we are. Look see verse 3: ‗Armed with the thunderbolt, and
confident in his strength, he has gone on destroying the cities of the Dasyus. Thunderer,
acknowledging the praises of your worshipper cast, for his sake, your shaft against the
Dasyus, and augment the strength and glory of the Arya.‘ Do you have book 4 of
the Rig Vedas with you?‟ Asked the professor.
„Yes I do,‟ I replied.
„Then please turn to book 4, hymn 16.‟
I did as requested and turned the book over to the professor.
„In verse 12 it says ‗For Kutsa, you have slain the unhappy Susna and in the
forepart of the day, attended by thousands you have slain Kuyava with the thunderbolt:
you have swiftly destroyed the Dasyus, and you have cut them to pieces in battle, with
the wheel of the Sun‘. There are other references also to the Aryans fighting
with and destroying the Dasyus. We know that the Aryans came from the
North, so clearly these Dasyus were the original natives in the south. So
the Dasyus and Dravidians are one and the same.‟
„I am impressed by your knowledge of the Vedas. Your reasoning does
seem to make a lot of sense to me.‟
„Thank you for your compliments. It has taken me many years to study
these scriptures; it has been a lifetime‟s work. Shall we continue?‟
„Yes please,‟ I replied.
„So we have established that the Dasyus/Dravidians were in India first.
Now we need to establish when and from where they originated. Let us
first go through the different theories as to the origins of the Dravidians.
There are five basic theories as to where the Dravidians originated. The
first by Kanakasabhai Pillai states that they came from the Far East from
Thailand to Bengal and then by sea to the rest of South India. This is
unlikely because the dates don‟t work out. Civilisations in the Thailand
and Far East started much too late, for this to be true.
The second theory is from Caldwell. He said that the Dravidians came
from the Turanian homeland of Central Asia; this was based on the
237
 SECOND CHANCE

supposed similarity of Dravidian languages to Indo-European languages

(Latin, Greek, Gothic, Celtic and Persian). However, a more detailed
analysis of the Dravidian languages, which are Tamil and the South
Indian languages, shows that they do not have that much in common
with the Indo-European languages.
The third theory is from another Englishman, Col. Holdwich, who felt
that the Dravidians were Semitic and came from Mesopotamia; this is a
possibility. The fourth theory, advocated by Prof Elliot Smith, is that the
Dravidians come from Egypt. This is based on some superficial
architectural similarities between Egyptian and Dravidian architecture.
However, this would put the start of the Dravidians at between 2000 –
800BC, which is too late for them to become established and then for the
Aryans to arrive. The final and fifth theory is that the Dravidians are
descended from people from the Mediterranean. This is the theory that I
favour. The earliest that this would put the Dravidians is at the same time
as the earliest Mediterranean civilisations, which were Egyptian. There are
numerous Egyptian archaeological records, many more than that of the
Dravidians, and if we were to say that they were contemporaries, then the
Dravidians came and settled in India around 2600BC.‟
„2600BC ?‟
„Yes 2600BC. It also means that the Aryans would have had to come
sometime after 2600BC. This is also supported by the archaeological
records.‟ Professor Chandra got up and picked up a copy of the
Encyclopaedia Britannica. He leafed through it and then sat down
reading from the encyclopaedia.
„Yes here it is. This is what it says:
‗The oldest excavations in the Indian sub-continent are in a place called Harappa
and Mohenjo-Daro which are in Pakistan and North Western India in Gujarat.
The civilization, there, is known to have comprised two large cities, Harappa and
Mohenjo-Daro, and over 100 towns and villages, often of relatively small size. The
two cities were each over 3 miles (5 km) in circuit, and their outstanding
magnitude suggests political centralization, either in two large states or in a single
great empire with alternative capitals. It may be that Harappa succeeded Mohenjo-
Daro, which is known to have been devastated more than once by exceptional
floods.
The southern region of the civilization in Kathiawar and beyond appears to be of
later origin than the major Indus sites. The civilization was literate, and its script,
with some 250 to 500 characters, has been partly and tentatively deciphered; the
language has been tentatively identified as Dravidian. The nuclear dates of the
civilization appear to be about 2500–1700 BC.‘
Again in the Rig Veda there are many references to floods, the
archaeological records fit with what is in the Vedas. In book 1, hymn 85,
verse 9: ‗Indra wields the well made, golden, many bladed thunderbolt, which the
238
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

skilful Tvasta has framed for him, that he may achieve great exploits in war. He has
slain Vrtra and sent forth an ocean of water.‘
„That is amazing, I didn‟t realise that the Rig Veda was a historical
record.‟ I said.
„Many people do not believe that it is a historical record and that they
often take this verse to be completely metaphorical. But I believe that it
can be metaphorical as well as depicting some historical events. Very
good. The next point to note is that the Dravidians/Dasyus had very
different beliefs from the Aryans. In the Rig Veda it refers to the
differences between the Dasyus and the Aryans, book 1, hymn 51, verse
8: ‗Discriminate between the Aryas and they who are Dasyus. Restraining those who
perform no religious rites, compel them to submit to the performer of sacrifices‘
You see the Aryans used fire in their worship, Agni, whereas the
Dasyus/Dravidians did not. The Dravidians worshiped snakes, Shiva and
the Shakti. They believed that the universe originated from a cosmic egg.
Contrast this to the verses in the Rig Veda which talk about the origins of
the universe. I think it is in the tenth book, hymn 120 something.‟
Professor Chandra picked up volume 4 and started leafing through it.
„Yes here it is. It is hymn 129. I‟ll read it out to you:
‗There was neither non-existence nor existence was. There was no world, no space,
nor that which is above space. What stirred? In whose protection was it all? From
where did the deep unfathomable water come from?
There was neither death, nor immortality then. There was no indication of day or
night. That One, without breath, breathed out by his own impulse. Other than
that there was nothing else whatever
There was darkness covered by darkness in the beginning. This entire world was
undistinguishable water. That empty united world, which was covered by a mere
nothing, was produced through the power of heat.
In the beginning there was desire, which was the first seed of the mind. Sages
having meditated in their hearts have discovered by their wisdom the bond of the
existent with the non-existent.
A ray [of light] stretched out, whether across, or below, or above? Some were
shedders of seed, others were mighty. Food was the lesser; the eater was the greater,
Who really knows? Who in this world may declare it! Whence was this creation?
Whence was it made? The gods were subsequent to the creation. So who can tell
from where it came?
Whence this creation has arisen - perhaps it formed itself, or perhaps it did not.
He who is the highest in heaven, he assuredly knows, or if he knows not (then no
one else does)‘

239
 SECOND CHANCE

„You see Arjuna; the Aryan‟s view of the origination of the universe was
very different. There was no cosmic egg, but some vast body of water
hanging in nothingness, the origin of the water being a mystery. But, that
the creator God, brought the Universe into existence through his
thoughts. That is a very different belief from that held by the Dravidians.
There are other differences also,‟ Professor Chandra paused to drink
some coffee and nibble on a biscuit.
He was a treasure trove of information. I was having trouble keeping
up. This was the first time that I was hearing that there were religious
differences between the Aryans and Dravidians. I had always thought that
the ancestors of the Indian people, had the same set of beliefs.
„Please do go on Professor Chandra. I am finding all of this very
interesting.‟
„Are you sure? Most people find this very boring,‟ replied Professor
Chandra.
„No, I assure you. I am finding this very, very interesting.‟
„Very good. The Dravidians were not like the Aryans, they did not have
the temple as their source of worship. The female form for worship was
quite central. In all likelihood the Linga that you see in Shiva temples
originated with the Dravidians. Linga worship does not originate from
the Aryans. Their worship centres around the Linga, washing it,
venerating it with flowers. Shiva is Dravidian not Aryan.‟
I was astonished that Professor Chandra was saying that Shiva did not
originate in the Vedas.
„Are you telling me that Shiva is not in the Vedas? That the Vedas do
not have anything to do with Shiva? But how can this be? All of the
Gurus in India today are worshiping Shiva and saying that it is all based
on what is written in the Vedas. Are they misleading people?‟ I asked,
wondering whether this Professor was genuine, or making it all up.
Practically everyone I met was telling me that Shiva and the Vedas went
together, yet here was Professor Chandra telling me something quite
different.
„Yes it is true there is no mention of the name Shiva at all in the Vedas.
Anyone can confirm this for themselves. Shiva is a Dravidian word
meaning the Red One. It is not an Aryan name for a god. Now, what
these gurus will tell you is that although Shiva is not mentioned, a god
called Rudra is mentioned in the Vedas and that Shiva and Rudra are the
same. This is a possibility, as Rudra has braided hair, like Shiva, and is
associated with a bull, as you know Shiva rides on a bull called Nandi.
However there are two points to note. Rudra is mentioned in 29 verses
out of 10,552. In stark contrast, the gods Indra, Agni are mentioned in
thousands of verses. So Rudra can hardly be a major god in the Aryan
pantheon. The second point is that Rudra is a god that is feared, a bringer

240
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

of things that are not good, a god that one has to be careful not to upset,
book 2 hymn 33 talks about Rudra. Here it is verse 14:
‗Let the weapon of Rudra veer from us; let the great malevolence of the dreaded god
go past us. Loosen the taut bows for the sake of our generous patrons; O bountiful
one, have mercy on our children and grand-children. O tawny and amazing bull, O
God, do not become incensed or kill us. Be here for us, Rudra, and hear our call.‘‖
„But why are there so many temples to Shiva, and why do all the gurus
worship Shiva, if Shiva or Rudra are minor gods in the Vedas?‟ I was
wondering whether it was really true what the Professor was saying, or
whether he was merely being selective in what he was quoting from the
Vedas.
„This is a very good question Arjuna. The answer to this question will
become clear once you understand the rest of Indian history. The
Dravidians were not totally wiped out. They fled further south and stayed
there. India is a vast continent and it has always been difficult to
penetrate the interior and reach the south. The Aryans stayed in the north
and pushed the Dravidians into the deep south. Even the Emperor
Ashoka, who had the largest empire in India, never got further south than
what is now Andhra Pradesh. Tamil Nadu stayed intact. That is where
Dravidian culture remained and flourished. Meanwhile Aryan culture and
civilisation was constantly under attack from invasions from the North.
Ironically what they had done to the Dravidians was constantly
happening to them. Firstly from the Persians, then the Greeks led by
Alexander the Great, then later on by the Mughals. As well as being
attacked and defeated by different races, their religion and beliefs were
constantly under assault. Even their language Sanskrit, has been
influenced by Dravidians, in fact, the Sanskrit word puja, comes from the
Dravidian word Pu for flower. More recently Hindi has been
tremendously influenced by Urdu. Islamic Mughal culture has permeated
right throughout India, have you not noticed that Urdu and Hindi have
many similar words?‟
I was finding all of this difficult to take in. Professor‟s Chandra‟s view
of Indian history was quite different from what I had read, and was led to
believe. He did seem to base his theories on factual archaeological
records and on what was happening in other civilisations in the world at
that time. I realised that I had never validated anything that I had read
about Indian history, there was so little information to go on. My
thoughts went back to „1984‟ by George Orwell, in particular, to the way
that successive governments in the totalitarian future continually re-wrote
history to suit themselves, bearing no resemblance to reality. I wondered
if such a thing had happened with Indian history. If it had then how
would I or anyone else for that matter really know the truth? I was keen
to know more of what Professor Chandra thought. I was hungry for an
241
 SECOND CHANCE

alternative perspective. I was still not sure whether Professor Chandra

was incredibly gifted and insightful or just plain eccentrically mad, with
elaborate, but false theories.
„So where did the Aryans come from, and who wrote the Vedas?‟ I
asked.
„Very good. Yes we need to establish these things, before we go on to
what happened in India in the 15th, 19th and 20th centuries. Again, my
dear Arjuna, there are multiple theories as to where the Aryans came
from. One theory is that they were originally from Central Asia. The basis
for this is theory is that the Aryan and Central Asian languages are
similar. The Aryans relied heavily on horses, as did the Mongols, both of
these factors are taken to form the thesis that they came from Central
Asia (modern day Russia and the „stans‟ (Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan etc.)
bordering Russia). However, the problem with this theory is that their
culture was so advanced. It is difficult to conjecture that such a culture
could have developed in such a barren and hostile environment, so we
should dismiss this theory.
The second theory which is growing in its appeal is that it is originally
Indian. This theory was promoted by Swami Dayanand Saraswati, on the
basis that the Vedas are Indian and only are found in India. This has
found increased acceptance in the increasingly jingoistic political
environment that we now find ourselves. This theory is especially liked by
extreme right wing Hindu political groups who are advocating India for
the Hindus only. Unfortunately, this is totally wishful thinking. This is
primarily because many of the Aryan words that describe natural things,
especially for different trees and vegetation, are not found in India. In
addition, the Aryans considered the Elephant a strange animal that they
could not explain rather their description was that it was a deer (Mriga)
with a trunk (Hastin). Besides the god Indra in the Vedas is described as
the king of the gods who wields a thunderbolt. Indra, in the Vedas, is also
said to have slain Vrtra who is Indra‟s father, and that his father was
trying to kill Indra, his son.‟
Professor Chandra picked up the Vedas and went to book four, hymn
18 and read verses 11 and 12. „Here Arjuna, it is written in the Vedas:
‗And the mother turned to the buffalo: ‗My son, the gods here are deserting you.‘
Then Indra, wanting to kill Vrtra, said, ‗Vishnu, my friend, stride as far as you
can.‘ Who made your mother a widow? Who wished to kill you when you were
lying still or moving? What god helped you when you grabbed your father by the
foot and crushed him?‘

He then looked straight into my eyes and asked, „Have you ever come
across a god that wields a thunderbolt, who killed his own father, a father
who was also trying to kill his own son?‟

242
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

I thought for a moment and then I remembered from my school days,

Greek mythology. Zeus was the king of the Greek gods, he wielded a
thunderbolt, he killed his father Chronos who was swallowing and killing
all of his children as they were born.
„Are you referring to the Greek god Zeus?‟ I asked.
„Yes I am. You see Swami Dayanand Saraswati was very unfamiliar with
anything outside of what he had been taught. Indra is very similar to the
Greek god Zeus, and also has similarity with the Norse god, Thor. So his
ignorant statement that the Vedas are uniquely Indian, whose stories and
narratives are not found elsewhere are false. Everyone likes to be special,
and to think that they belong to the best race/civilisation, are the most
sophisticated, are the chosen people, and live in the best place. It is what
everyone likes to believe. Quite often it is simply not true. The Aryans are
not uniquely Indian. They were an exogenous civilisation fully developed
somewhere, bringing with them a culture that was different from the
Dravidians.
So we come to the third theory, which is that they came from South
East Europe, the same place as where the Greek civilisation originated
from. This theory was originally developed by Dr Hoernle and was later
supported by Sir George Grierson. This would explain the similarities
between the structure of Sanskrit and Greek languages, as well as,
explaining the similarity between Zeus and Indra. Most probably the
Aryans came into India in two separate waves, as there is a difference
between the North Eastern and the North Western Indian languages. As
to when they came, it would have to be after the Dravidians, which
would make it, at the earliest around 1700BC. Interestingly Ancient
Greek civilisation started around 1700BC. So in summary, Arjuna, the
Dravidians probably were similar to the ancient Egyptians coming around
2400BC to India, followed by the Aryans, who were similar to the ancient
Greeks, coming around 1700BC.‟
„Fascinating, it does seem to fit in with the history of other civilisations.
What about the Vedas?‟ I asked.
„The word Veda comes from the Sanskrit Vid (to know) hence Veda
means knowledge. I personally believe, based on the timing of the various
movements that the Vedas date from about 1400BC. That is the earliest
date and the latest that they can be is about 800BC. Because we know
that the Upanishads were composed around 700BC. But I am getting
ahead of myself.
Let us get back to the Vedas and Vedic literature. Vedic literature is
classified into three phases. Phase 1 is the Samhitas. They consist of the
four Vedas: Rig, Sama, Yajur and Athar. The Rig Veda consists of 10
books, books 2-9 are the oldest, books 1 and 10 later additions. The Sama
Veda is the book of chants to be sung at the time of Soma worship, the
majority of its text is verses repeated from the Rig Veda. The Yajur Veda
243
 SECOND CHANCE

is a book of sacrifices, consisting of a White book (hymns) and a Black

Book (commentary). The black book is the older of the two. The fourth
Veda, the Athar Veda, was for a long time not considered to be a Veda,
as it has a very different theme. It talks about danger from evil spirits and
talks about magical chants and formulas for protection. This could be an
influence of Pre-Aryan culture.
The second phase of Vedic literature is the Brahmanas. These books
were developed by the priesthood, the Brahmins, and explain the
meaning of the sacrifices contained in the Vedas. It is a manual for the
priests – each Brahmana is linked to a Veda. The priests were beginning
to become powerful in the Aryan culture, this gives us a date of around 6-
800BC for the Brhamanas.
The third phase consists of the Upanishads, Aranyakas and Sutra. These
are all explanatory texts. The Aranyakas deal with mysticism and
philosophy not rituals, as do the Upanishads. Upanishad implies „sitting
nearer‟ written between 700-500BC. We see an increased desire to explain
the Vedas.‟
„How can you be sure that these later phases were written at this time?‟
„We can be sure because of what we know about Indian history and
how people lived. We now find documentary evidence, words carved
onto rocks, stones and pillars. The belief that Indian civilisation goes
back to 5000 or 7000 BC is absurd, if it were that old then we should
expect to see something as sophisticated and as old as the pyramids, we
do not see that at all. The Harappa archaeological sites are later than the
pyramids of Egypt, and although they are quite sophisticated, they are
nowhere close to the level of sophistication as the Egyptian or
Mesopotamian, Babylonian, civilisation that pre-date this site by 500-800
years. Unfortunately, Indian civilisation and the Vedas are later than the
Mesopotamian, Persian, Egyptian and Greek ones. They are not the
earliest records.‟
„But Professor Chandra, you are the only one that I have heard that says
this. Everyone else that I meet says that Indian civilisation is the oldest.
How can they all be wrong, and you be right?‟ I asked.
Professor Chandra laughed. „We all like to believe that some things are
true. It makes us feel good about ourselves. Believing that Indian
civilisation and the Vedas are the oldest on this planet are simply wishful
thinking. I also used to believe what others believed. But there is no
archaeological evidence to support what they say, nor is it supported by
an analysis of Sanskrit with other languages, nor is it supported by what
we know happened in other civilisations. Unfortunately, Indian
archaeology and research into Ancient Indian History is at a rather more
basic level, than the study of other civilisations. There are fewer people
working on it, and those that are, have very little money. Every Indian
student wants to be a Doctor, Engineer, Accountant, or Businessman
244
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

they do not want to become archaeologists or historians. I am drifting

into politics again.‟
Professor Chandra‟s logic seemed compelling, but he was a lone voice,
with such a theory.
„But what about the dates, how can you be so sure?‟ I asked.
„We can be sure of the later Vedic literature phases, thanks to Buddha
and Emperor Ashoka. Buddha was born as Siddhartha Gautama, heir to a
kingdom in North India, in the 5th century BC. The degenerated state of
the „Hindu‟ society by 500BC, a mere several hundred years after the
completion of the Vedas and the Upanishads, led to the rejection of such
systems by Siddhartha Gautama and led to the formation of Buddhism.
This was the condition of the society at that time: firstly, the Brahmins
who were the priests, had a monopoly on religion. They were continually
coming up with special mantras which they would sell at high prices to
the people, including the poor. The glory of the Aryan culture had
passed. The Brahmins encouraged superstition. They extorted large sums
of money, introducing mystic spells, mantras for every occasion. The
Brahmins taught that without these you could not progress, there were
mantras for sleep, for staying awake, for business, for coughs, for colds et
cetera.
Secondly, the Brahmins encouraged people to do sacrifices and extorted
large sums of money from lots of „expensive‟ sacrifices. Only Brahmins
had the knowledge to conduct such sacrifices. They promoted the false
notion that only through large sums of money paid as Dakshina to
Brahmins would the sacrifice be accepted by the Gods. They increased
the frequency and requirement of such sacrifices.
Thirdly, the Brahmins encouraged self torture, flagellation „Tapas‟ to
„purify‟ oneself. Things like sitting in the middle of fire, or on top of an
ant hill, or standing upon one leg until the muscle had atrophied.
Neither the Brahmins nor the lay people could understand the hymns
of the Vedas or the deep philosophy of the Upanishads. The people
needed something easier to understand. A large proportion of Brahmin
priests led a debauched life amassing great riches for themselves. Society
was suffering from the evils of the caste system with the Sudras having a
life of degradation and humiliation. The Sudras hated the supremacy of
the „twice born‟. The Kshatriyas and Vaishyas also hated the Brahmins
because they had to put up with the arrogance of the Brahmins who did
practically nothing for the good of the society.
This was the environment that Buddha grew up in. He hated what he
saw and observed. He especially loathed the priests, and despised the
Kings for not providing justice for the poor. So he rejected them and all
of their teachings. Unfortunately, Buddha, threw out the baby with the
bath water, and formed his own religion, which has nothing to do with
the Vedas. There were many disillusioned people at that time, leading to
245
 SECOND CHANCE

Buddhism taking off as an alternative to oppressive Hinduism. In early

Buddhism there were no sacrifices, no payment for prayers, no special
mantras. People turned to Buddhism away from the Hindu priests, who
by this time had also drifted from the Vedas.
The income of the priests was significantly impacted; they were losing
their source of livelihood due to Buddhism. The kings and princes were
also affected, because they owed their recognition as Kshatriyas, kings, to
the magnanimity of the Brahmin priests who granted them a superior
social status, which allowed them to raise taxes. As people turned away
from Brahmins, they also started to question the authority of the kings
and princes. The final straw, that broke the camel‟s proverbial back, was
when Emperor Ashoka (304-232BC) converted to Buddhism. This led to
a mass conversion to Buddhism.
The priests and the kings who had been in power were now facing a
catastrophic crisis. They had to act quickly. That is when one of the
priests, Valmiki, came up with the Ramayana. This was a story about
Rama, a godly king who cared about the poor. It was a story that would
give the modern soap operas, a run for their money; it had love, betrayal,
war, everything that you needed to be exciting. It was a perfect story,
reuniting the priests and the kings, who were there to protect the poor. It
soon began to gain in popularity. It was a great story, and had nothing to
do with the Vedas or the Upanishads. Scholars cannot agree when it was
written, having a range from 500 to 100BC. I personally, believe that it
was probably conceived between 200-150BC,‟ Professor Chandra paused.
„Professor Chandra, this is too incredible for me to believe. Are you
telling me that the Ramayana is nothing but a clever marketing stunt and
campaign to win back market share from Buddhism. Like Coca-cola
introducing caffeine free diet coke to win back share from Pepsi?‟
„Well I would not have put it like that, but essentially that is what I am
saying. It was in the second century BC that Patanjali came up with the 8
methods of yoga: Yama abstention, Niyama observation, Asana posture,
Pranayama regulation of breath, Pratyahara withdrawl of senses, Dhyana
fixed attention, Samadhi concentration and Hatha body control. This was
a response to the eightfold path of Buddha. Before this time there is no
mention of yoga. Over a 1000 years have gone by, from the writing of the
Vedas, to yoga being mentioned. You see, Arjuna, the Brahmins in the
north, started interacting with the priests, the Dravidian priests in the
South, who had not been as affected by Buddhism, they took some of the
Dravidian beliefs and started mixing it with Aryan beliefs from the Vedas.
The synthesis of Dravidian and Arayan folklore ended up having
nothing, or very little to do with the Vedas or Upanishads. Buddha had
done his work, he had destroyed Vedic teaching. But what took its place
was Dravidic teaching and beliefs which were far more sinister than that
which was being taught by the Brahmins.‟
246
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

„What do you mean sinister?‟ I asked.

„We will leave that for another time,‟ replied Professor Chandra.
„After the success of the Ramayana, the priests came up with an even
greater epic the Mahabharata and then after that the Bhagavad Gita.
These were written from 200BC to 100AD.‟
„What as late as that, that cannot be correct!‟ All of this was so contrary
to what I had read and what I had been told.
„Yes it is that late. It was after the Ramayana. Everyone would agree
with that, and everyone would agree that the Ramayana was written after
Buddha. What they might say, is that before it was written it was told as a
story. But I would argue, why wait a thousand years to write it down?
Why not write it at the same time as the Vedas, if it was so important?
After all Rama is supposed to be the Prince of Ayodhya, around 5000BC.
If this were true, why is he not mentioned in the Vedas?‟
„Okay I can see your logic. But wouldn‟t that support the argument that
the Vedas were written a lot earlier than 5000BC?‟ I argued.
„Yes it would, but from the archaeological records and the history of
Egyptian, and Greek civilisations we came with an earliest possible date
of 1400BC. We know that there is no earlier written record of Ramayana
before 300BC. So logically, the most reasonable theory is that the
Ramayana was totally invented as a story to counter Buddhism as was the
Mahabharata. Further proof exists in the Vedas. I have already said there
was no mention of Shiva. There is also no mention of Rama. You would
have thought that if Rama was such a great incarnate God that he would
be mentioned specifically by name in the Vedas or Upanishads, if he
existed prior to 500BC. But he is not mentioned, so he did not exist prior
to 500BC.‟
Professor Chandra definitely knew his material. I was unable to argue.
His arguments seemed to be correct. The fact that all these yoga practices
talked about by the Gurus were not in the Vedas disturbed me. I
wondered how much truth the gurus were really telling. If Rama was a
story, then what about Krishna?
„What about Krishna, surely that cannot be all made up?‟ I asked.
„I am afraid, Arjuna, that it could well be made up, but not entirely. You
see the name Krishna is mentioned in the Vedas, about three times. I will
read out the references. Book 4, hymn 16, verse 13:
‗You have subjugated Pipru and the mighty Mrgaya for the sake of Rjisvan, the
son of Vidathin, you have slain the fifty thousand Krishnas; and as old age
destroys life you have demolished the cities of Sambara‘. Then Book 1, hymn
101, verse 1: „Offer adoration with oblations to him who is delighted with praise,
who, with Rjisvan, destroyed the pregnant wives of Krishna: desirous of protection,
we invoke, to become our friend, him, who is the showerer of benefits, who holds the
thunderbolt in his right hand attended by the Maruts‘. Then book 8, hymn
97, verses 13 & 14: ‗The swift moving Krishna with ten thousand demons stood
247
 SECOND CHANCE

on the Amsumati; by his might Indra caught him submerged in the water; he,
Indra, benevolent to man, smote these evil demons. I have seen the swift moving
demon lurking in an inaccessible place, in the depths of the river Amsumati, I have
seen Krishna standing there as the sun hidden by the clouds: I appeal to you,
[Indra], to conquer him in battle‘.
You can see from these verses that Krishna is either a race of people, or
a particular person or god, in whichever case he is the enemy of the
Aryans. In the Vedas Krishna is a demonic evil god, who is associated
with the Dasyus. You will notice that all the pictures of Krishna that you
see, have him painted blue, that is to indicate that he had a very dark
complexion. We know that the Aryans were fair and that the
Dasyus/Dravidians were dark. The Dravidian gods were of a dark
complexion. I mentioned that Shiva was a Dravidian god, he is also
painted blue in pictures, he too was dark. I am afraid that Krishna
according to the Rig Veda is a Dravidian demonic god that is an enemy.‟
„But could it not be that this Krishna in the Vedas is a different Krishna
from that in the Bhagavad Gita?‟ I asked, this was too crazy, to believe,
that millions of Hindus were worshiping demonic Dravidian gods, which
had nothing to do with their Aryan, Vedic heritage.
„Very good. Arjuna you are paying attention. This is a possibility, but in
the Bhagavad Gita, chapter 9, verse 17, according to the translation by
Srila Prabhupada it says that Krishna said to Arjuna:
‗I am the father of this universe, the mother, the support and the grandsire. I am the
object of knowledge, the purifier and the syllable Om. I am also the Rig, the Sama and
Yajur Vedas.‘ Krishna is referring himself to the Vedas.‟
„Yes but he says I am the Vedas, the knowledge rather than a specific
reference.‟ I replied. I was getting very angry. I could not believe what
Professor Chandra was saying. It just could not be true.
„Very good. You could interpret it your way Arjuna. But there is one last
piece of archaeological evidence. There are no statues of Krishna to be
found anywhere in India that date before 200AD, if he was such an
important God, the creator of this universe, one would expect that there
would be many statues of him. There are, but only after 200AD. On the
contrary there are many more statues of Buddha that date well before
Krishna. One can only conclude that worship of Krishna was brought
from Dravidian culture that had remained intact, in the first and second
century AD. That is the most reasonable, and scientific explanation.‟
Professor Chandra let out a deep sigh and relaxed in his chair.
I wished that I had not started the conversation with Professor
Chandra. I found what he was saying too difficult to believe. The
teachings of the gurus and that of ISKCON, all the yogas had nothing or
very little to do with the Vedas.

248
 THE VEDAS, BUDDHISM AND ANCIENT INDIAN HISTORY

„My dear Arjuna, I can see that you are worried. History keeps on
repeating itself. Over a hundred years ago, a historian, called Alberuni,
made this observation of India at the time of Buddha:
‗The noble faith had become the exclusive property of the educated few‘ and that
the ‗common people‘ were referred to idols and temples to unmeaning rites and
unhealthy restrictions.‘
‗Once the simple and straightforward Vedic religion had given place to orthodox
beliefs, complex rites and rituals, superstitions, hoaxes and affection primarily
because of the gross negligence and selfishness of Brahmin priests. They observed
studied silence over the degenerating religious practices and deliberately distorted or
misinterpreted the old religious scriptures with the object of fleecing the devotees and
befooling the poor and innocent people.‘
Unfortunately, we are at that time again. The true Vedas have been
overcome by Dravidic gods and rituals, by false teaching of Gurus, by
distortion of the scriptures; all in the pursuit of fame and astronomical
riches. It is no longer spirituality but a multi-billion dollar industry. That
is the reality Arjuna. It is next to impossible to find true Vedic spirituality
in India anymore.‟
This was very disturbing. If it was true. It was too incredible to be true.
I was wondering what to say. I closed my eyes to help digest and
concentrate on what I had just learnt, pondering what Professor Chandra
had said. I was interrupted from my mental machinations by a familiar
voice:
„There you are. I have been looking for you everywhere, do you realise
what the time is?‟ I turned round to see Rita, she was looking radiant, and
she was annoyed.
„I am sorry, darling. I got into a very interesting conversation with
Professor Chandra.‟
„Who is Professor Chandra?‟ she asked.
„Let me introduce you to Professor Chandra,‟ I turned around to
introduce Professor Chandra. There wasn‟t anybody there.
„Darling did you see anyone leave?‟ I asked.
„No, Arjuna, you were on your own, when I came in. You were sitting
there with your eyes closed,‟ replied Rita.
„I just had a two hour conversation with this Professor Chandra. We
went through the Vedas and Indian history.‟
„I am telling you, Arjuna, you were on your own.‟
I thought I had only closed my eyes for a few moments.Perhaps
Professor Chandra walked out while my eyes were closed. He might have
felt that I needed time alone to think about what he said. It was an odd
thing to leave just like that, but then again Professor Chandra seemed to
be a very unusual man.

249
 SECOND CHANCE

„Come on Arjuna, I am starving, let‟s go and have dinner,‟ urged Rita,

pulling at my arm.
„Okay, I‟m coming darling,‟ I gathered up the notes I had taken and
followed Rita into the restaurant.
After the meal I went to the reception to leave a note for Professor
Chandra, thanking him for the conversation that afternoon.
„I am sorry, sir. But Professor Chandra and his family checked out
today, they are no longer with us,‟ said the young man at the reception
desk.
This would explain why the Professor left so quickly. I surmised that his
son must have come into the library and told his father that they had to
leave to catch the train back to Delhi. This had been a truly exceptional
afternoon.

250
 17 WHERE NEXT?

The rest of the holiday at Ranthambore was relaxing but uneventful,

apart from seeing the odd tiger. As soon as I got back to Mumbai, I
checked all the references that Professor Chandra had given me, and I re-
read the verses that he had quoted in the Vedas. I also probed into the
history of India and the dates that he had given me for the Ramayana, the
Mahabharata and the Gita. There was some dispute as to when each of
these were composed, many Indian historians claiming that they existed
in oral tradition hundreds of years before they were written down. This
oral tradition theory was a possibility, but why wait until 200BC for
Valmiki to come and write down the Ramayana? Surely someone could
have written it down in 1000BC? After all that is when they had written
the Vedas. The same logic applied to the Mahabharata and Gita. It was
reasonable to conclude, as Professor Chandra had concluded, that the
Ramayana was written around 200BC, the Mahabharata around 100BC
and the Gita finished around 100AD. All of them were most probably
made up stories, authored by a collective of Brahmin priests wishing to
stem the flood of conversions from Hinduism to Buddhism.
I was getting restless. My journey in searching for the truth had come to
a dead end. I had stopped Reiki after learning more about it, realisation of
my own behaviour and the strangeness of Anand‟s behaviour. There was
too much controversy around Transcendental Meditation, as to what it
really was and was not. There was something magical and spiritual about
astrology and crystals. But I was not willing to dabble in things that I did
not fully understand. It seemed that there could be catastrophic
consequences if I got it wrong.
My search into the scriptures, the Vedas and The Gita had led to more
confusion. Perhaps it was too deep and too complex for me to
understand and reconcile the differences between what Professor
251
 SECOND CHANCE

Chandra told me, and that which was preached by the Gurus. Yet there
was some deep spiritual truth in those ancient works, in Reiki, in
Transcendental Meditation, in the teachings of the gurus. But I just could
not make it all fit together. The pieces of the jigsaw were there, but I did
not know the final picture. The different pieces remained separate and
jumbled up.
I was pondering all these things lying in bed, wondering what to do
next. It‟s then that I thought of it.
„Let‟s go to the Marriott in Juhu and have lunch there.‟ I said to a sleepy
Rita.
„What was that?‟
„I said, let‟s go and have lunch at the Marriott.‟
„Why do you want to go all the way there?‟
„I just thought it would be a great place to have a discussion.‟
Rita now got up.
„What discussion?‟
„We need to decide where we are going to go next. Whether we should
stay in Mumbai or go somewhere else.‟
„I am tired of moving around, following you all over the world,‟ Rita
was getting angry.
„I know darling. This time I want you to decide. Where ever you decide,
that‟s where we‟ll go.‟
„Are you really going to let me decide?‟
„Yes this time you decide.‟
„And you‟ll agree to whatever I decide?‟
„Yes, I‟ll agree to whatever you decide.‟
„Okay we‟ll go to the Marriott and discuss it,‟ Rita had cheered up.
I had already decided where we were going to go. I wanted to come
back to London. I had also worked out how I was going to get Rita to
come to the same decision. I had used it often when facilitating large
groups to get everyone to agree on an issue or action. If I could do it with
a group of shrewd top executives, surely I could do the same with Rita.
Sitting in the bright and airy lounge overlooking the Indian Ocean, dining
at her favourite place, would get her in a relaxed mood. It would be easy
to get Rita to say let‟s go to London.
It was a dazzling sunny day. We had put our order in and were waiting
for our food to arrive.
„So where would you like to go next?‟ I asked.
„I don‟t know. What are the options?‟ she replied.
„Well we could stay in Mumbai, we could go to Colombo, or
somewhere else in India, perhaps back to Ahmedabad, or go back to the
UK. Or somewhere else – it‟s totally your decision.‟
Rita wondered for a while.

252
 WHERE NEXT?

„No let‟s stick to these four. But I am not sure which would be the best.
Where do you want to go?‟
„Look it‟s totally up to you. I want you to decide. What we could do is
to develop some criteria by which to decide which the best place to go to
is. We then score each location against the criteria and then add up the
scores. The location with the highest score is the one that we go to. Let‟s
decide the criteria together but you do the scoring.‟
„What do you mean by criteria?‟
„Well one criterion would be cost of living, another friends, another one
climate et cetera. If you like we could weight the criteria. So let‟s say that
you felt that the friends' criterion was twice as important as the climate
criterion. Then climate would have a weighting of 1 and friends would
have a weighting of 2. We then multiply the scores by the weights and
then add them up.‟
„It all sounds rather complicated.‟
„It‟s quite simple in practice let me show you.‟
„Let‟s say we are deciding between Mumbai and Colombo and we have
only two criteria climate and friends, climate has a weighting of 1 and
friends 2. Now let me ask you on a scale of 1 to 10; where 10 is the best
and 1 is the worst what would you score Mumbai?‟
„I would give it an 8.‟
„And what about Colombo?‟
„A 6.‟
„Okay now let‟s to do friends what would you give Mumbai and what
would you give Colombo, on a scale of 1 to 10?‟
„Mumbai would be 6 and Colombo would be an 8,‟ replied Rita.
„Okay now if we just add the scores up without the weightings then
Mumbai would get 8 for climate and 6 for friends making it 14; and
Colombo would get 6 for climate and 8 for friends making it 14 as well.
But you feel that friends is more important than the weather so we need
to weight them. So Mumbai gets 8 times 1 for the climate, and 6 times 2
for friends that makes it 8 plus 12 which is 20. Colombo gets 6 times 1
for the climate and 8 times 2 for friends which is 6 plus 16 making it 22,
thus Colombo scores higher than Mumbai after weighting.‟
„Ah. I see what you were trying to tell me.‟
„Yes it‟s really quite simple. All we have to do is list the criteria, get the
weightings and then do the scoring, then multiply the scores by the
weights and add them up. The one with the highest score is the place we
go to. Are you happy with that?‟
„Okay,‟ said Rita hesitantly.
It took a while to develop the criteria and the scores. It took the main
course and desert and half way through the coffees to finish the scoring
and weightings. I got Rita to put in the scores and weights, but skilfully
influencing the weights to ensure that London would come out on top.
253
 SECOND CHANCE

„Okay so are you happy with the scores and the weights.‟
„I think that you are up to something. I feel that you are not really
letting me decide.‟
„I‟m only trying to help you with the decision.‟
„Okay add up the scores, the way that you want to do it. But I am going
to make the final decision, irrespective of the scores.‟
I hadn‟t counted on this response. You didn‟t get senior executives
crying foul of the process at the end of the process. They would be too
embarrassed to shout out that they had been duped. It would be an
indictment on them that they hadn‟t realised earlier that this would lead
them to an option that they were unhappy with. Rita had figured out that
I was trying to get the answer that I wanted and she wasn‟t going to let
me get away with it.
„We agreed on how we were going to do this,‟ I said.
„No we agreed that I would make the decision. All this criteria, scoring
and weighting was your idea. I know you like all these complex things
that‟s why I let you do it.‟
I put my face in my hands and let out a deep sigh.
„Why did we waste all this time going through this exercise if you were
not going to stick with the findings?‟
„I agreed to it, because it was something that you wanted to do. I am
going to make the final decision.‟
I was not going to win this argument.
„Okay let‟s finish the scoring and weighting, and then you decide.‟
The scores came out London 74, Ahmedabad 73, Mumbai 70 and
Colombo 54. London was on top but only just, despite my manipulation.
It was an important decision, it wasn‟t clear cut. I would have to let Rita
decide.
„So London has come top,‟ I said, hoping that she would go with it.
„Only just. I think that we should go to Ahmedabad.‟
This was a big surprise.
„Why Ahmedabad?‟
„I just feel that we should go there.‟
I had to think of another way out of this.
„Okay let‟s go to Ahmedabad and see if we can find a place to stay. If
we find a place and you like it we‟ll stay. It‟s been a while since you were
there, you might not like it when we get there.‟
„But I might like it. And you did say it was my decision.‟
„Yes I did say that it was your decision. I‟ll book the tickets and get in
contact with Shrenik and Frontier Management and ask him to fix up
some places for us to see. Nice places. We‟ll go next weekend. If you like
it in Ahmedabad, then that‟s where we‟ll stay.‟
A week would give me more time to work on persuading Rita that
London was the best place to go and that it did come on top from the
254
 WHERE NEXT?

scoring exercise. I was wrong she didn‟t budge one bit. The more I
argued for London, the keener she became for going to Ahmedabad. This
was not working.
The car from Fortune Landmark hotel was there to pick us up on
Saturday morning from Ahmedabad airport. We got to the hotel at 10,
time to freshen up quickly before Shrenik arrived at 11. He had lined up
five places for us to see, one of them in the same complex that I had
been in earlier.
„Shrenik has found five places for us to see. I am not sure that we
should spend another year here in Ahmedabad. It is your decision. But
why don‟t we let God decide for us.‟
„How are you going to let God decide?‟ asked Rita.
„We‟ll pray to God to give us a sign today and if we get a sign we‟ll stay.‟
I said, pretty sure that we were not going to get any sign from God.
„If you want to pray we‟ll pray. But I‟m telling you that I am going to
make the decision. You told me that I could choose.‟
I hoped that the places that Shrenik had selected were not up to Rita‟s
standards.
„I think we should really let God decide. He knows what is best.‟
„But you don‟t even to know who God is. You‟ve been spending all
your time trying to find out, what makes you think that you are going to
get an answer?‟
„Well I may not know who is. But he knows all of us and I am going to
ask for a sign whether to stay or not stay. You believe in God and know
who is.‟
„Yes I do and I know who he is.‟
„Then I‟m sure he‟ll give you a sign even if he doesn‟t give me one. Shall
we pray?‟
„Okay let‟s pray.‟
Both Rita and I went down on our knees and then I prayed.
„Oh God. Please guide us. Give us a sign today to tell us whether or not
we are supposed to stay in Ahmedabad. If we do not receive a sign then
we will take it that we are not meant to be here.‟
„You really don‟t want us to be in Ahmedabad, you tried with that
stupid scoring system and now you are trying to use God as an excuse to
not be in Ahmedabad. You never keep your word. But this time I am
going to decide. You said that it was my decision,‟ Rita was quite annoyed
with me.
Shrenik showed us all the places: Apartment 399 in Bodakdev on the
outskirts of Ahmedabad was the best place. The flat, A4, opposite to
where I had previously stayed was available same size, and slightly better
located, as there was construction work going on the other side.
„This place is lovely. Arjuna look can you see them, the peacocks?‟ Rita
pointed out of the kitchen window to a plot of vacant land in front,
255
 SECOND CHANCE

which had some shrubs and small trees. There were two peacocks
perched on the trees looking up at the window. Rita was right it did look
lovely. The bathrooms were modern, three bedrooms and a study room,
marble flooring throughout and a modern fitted kitchen. Milan the
landlord was in his twenties, he came from a rich family of industrialists
who once owned one the textile mills in Ahmedabad, coined as the
Manchester of the East by the popular British press at the time of
Mahatma Gandhi‟s visit to London.
Milan was asking quite a bit more than what I had paid for the
apartment opposite. He was offering it furnished whereas I had got the
apartment unfurnished previously. Shrenik showed us the rest of the
properties on the list, but Rita had set her heart on A4, Apartment 399. It
was 3 in the afternoon by the time we finished.
„I am hungry.‟ I said to Rita.
„So am I.‟
„Let‟s go to a McDonald‟s I don‟t want anything spicy.‟
„A McDonald‟s! Where are you going to find a McDonald‟s in
Ahmedabad? We have come here all the way to India and you want to eat
American junk food!‟
„My stomach is not feeling right I need something bland.‟
„But there is no McDonald‟s in Ahmedabad, Arjuna.‟
„There is one. Shrenik told me that a new one opened up just a few
months ago in the centre. I am sure that the driver knows where it is.
Shrenik said it was somewhere on Ashram road.‟
„I don‟t know what I am going to do with you.‟
The driver knew where the McDonald‟s was. It was on Ashram Road
the main road running through Ahmedabad, located opposite the
Ahmedabad Textile Mill Owner‟s Association an art deco building
designed by the French architect, Le Corbusier. On top of the
McDonald‟s was the City Gold multi-plex cinema. Ahmedabad had
certainly become a lot more modern in the last eighteen months, such a
rapid level of development. There was nothing art deco about the
McDonald‟s it looked pretty much like any McDonald‟s in the UK or US.
There was a bench outside with a large plastic model of the McDonald‟s
clown sitting there casually smiling on all the passing traffic. Several kids
were sitting next to it having their picture taken.
Inside the menu was a little different. There was no apple pie just ice
cream. No beef products, no Big Mac, just chicken, fish and lots of exotic
vegetarian options. I had to hand it to McDonald‟s they had tailored the
menu enough to make it Indian without losing the overall American feel.
I ordered a McChicken meal and Rita ordered a Fillet of Fish meal.
Everything was the same as in London, even the fries. Perhaps
Ahmedabad would not be that bad. The weather was absolutely perfect.
In December the skies are crystal clear, in the early morning the
256
 WHERE NEXT?

temperature is 8-12 degrees Celsius (46 to 54 fahrenheit), climbing slowly

to a peak in the mid twenties; which would have made it a perfect
summer‟s day if we had been in the UK.
„Let‟s sit over there,‟ I motioned Rita to a table on the far side of the
restaurant.
There weren‟t too many people eating at this time of day, and it was
fairly deserted on that side; except for a man in his late forties sitting with
a young girl. He was busy eating away and she was quietly sitting sipping
a drink, she was a lot younger than him. Something dodgy going on there,
I thought.
We sat down and started to eat. I was sitting opposite Rita. Diagonally
opposite me, on the other table, was the man who was sitting opposite
the girl. He was tall for someone in Gujarat, short dark hair, and a rugged
pot marked complexion. He had dark eyes and bushy eyebrows. He was
wearing a blue shirt and dark trousers, he was well built. He was busy
talking to the girl and munching into a McChicken sandwich.
Occasionally I would catch his eye and he would smile at me. Unusual, I
thought, most Gujaratis are short, very slim and vegetarians, I wondering
what he‟s doing in a McDonald‟s having lunch at 3 in the afternoon.
I kept on looking at him and he kept looking at me and smiling.
„Hello‟ I said, wondering whether he would respond.
„Hello‟ he replied in a deep voice.
„Are you from Ahmedabad or are you visiting‟, he asked. He took me a
little by surprise as he spoke with very little accent and had asked me a
question. It was normally me asking all the questions.
„No we are just visiting. We live in Mumbai at the moment.‟ I replied.
„My name is Roshan and this is my niece Mary,‟ Roshan held out his
hand.
That was his niece, not some clandestine romantic rendezvous.
„My name is Arjuna and this is my wife Rita.‟ I shook his hand and
wondered that Mary was a very unusual name for an Indian girl.
„Is this your first time in Ahmedabad?‟ asked Roshan.
„No. I used to live here about a year and a half ago. We are wondering
whether we should come back to Ahmedabad.‟
„You are not from India, I can tell from your accent.‟
„No I am from England and Rita is from Sri Lanka. But both our
grandfathers are from Gujarat.‟
„So you speak Gujarati?‟ Roshan asked.
„Yes a little bit.‟
„No he doesn‟t his Gujarati is terrible.‟ Rita interrupted.
I laughed and so did Roshan and his niece.
„Ahmedabad is a nice place. I am sure that you will like it here. Are you
in business?‟

257
 SECOND CHANCE

„I used to be. I am on an extended vacation doing some private

research. What do you do?‟ I thought it only polite to ask.
„I am a Pastor of a church.‟
„You are a pastor, here in Ahmedabad?‟ I said rather surprised, but it
explained why his niece was called Mary.
„Yes here in Ahmedabad. It is called Faith Church, here is my card.‟
Roshan handed me his card. I took mine out, as a kind of reflex, and
exchanged cards with him.
The card had a picture of a man in the middle; on the top of the man
was the drawing of a bird.
„This is very unusual,‟ I said not knowing what to make of it all. Roshan
did not look like a pastor let alone like a religious man. Ahmedabad was a
stronghold for Hindus, there were Christians in India mainly in the
South, but I didn‟t know that there were any in Gujarat, and what was he
doing in McDonald‟s? (You didn‟t find Indian Holy men eating non-veg
American burgers.)
„Yes it is a picture of a dove, which is the Holy Spirit.‟
„The Holy Spirit?‟
„Yes the Holy Spirit is the spirit of God.‟
I sat back and handed the card to Rita.
„Do you like McDonald‟s?‟, she asked Roshan. Obviously Rita had been
having the same thoughts as I was having.
„Yes. I do not like spicy food. This is my favourite.‟
Mary his niece was busy listening to our conversation and smiling at me
and Rita. She had a very pleasant large smile, a dimple in her cheek
deepened every time she smiled. She hadn‟t said anything yet.
„So what kind of church is Faith Church, do you have many people?‟
„It is an independent Pentecostal church.‟
„A Pentecostal church?‟ I had not heard of this kind of church before.
„Yes Pentecostal is from the day of Pentecost, fifty days after our Lord
Jesus was crucified the Holy Spirit came to earth.‟ Roshan replied.
„I see,‟ I didn‟t understand a word of what Roshan was saying.
He seemed very friendly. I wouldn‟t normally have asked but it was so
strange to meet a Christian pastor in Ahmedabad. Why would any Indian
choose to believe in Jesus, a western God?
„I hope you don‟t mind me asking, and you don‟t have to answer this
question.‟
„You can ask me anything. If I cannot answer, I will tell you. Please do
not feel shy,‟ he beamed a broad smile back it me.
„Why do you believe in Jesus?‟
„That is a good question. Do you have to rush off somewhere or do you
have time.‟
I glanced at my watch a reflex action. We had nothing else to do that
afternoon. There were no more apartments or houses to view.
258
 WHERE NEXT?

„We have time,‟ I looked at Rita; luckily for me she nodded her head in
agreement.
„Before I gave my life to Jesus, I was a completely different person,‟
started Roshan.
I had heard this phrase „gave my life to Jesus‟, why on earth would Jesus
want someone‟s life? I had asked Roshan the question now I would have
to listen to what he had to say.
„Shall I go on?‟ Roshan asked. He must have detected that I was
thinking about what he had just said.
„Yes please do, I‟m listening.‟
„At college I used to be very athletic, doing lots of sports and fitness. I
was very aggressive and had a very big temper. I used to get angry
quickly. One day I got into an argument with my best friend and I beat
him up. I came back to my room and just sat on my bed wondering why I
had beaten him up and feeling bad at what I had done. I was just sitting
there. I don‟t know how long I sat there. Then I looked up at a calendar
that was on the wall above my desk. There was a light coming from the
calendar. It grew bigger and bigger until Jesus was standing in front of
me.‟
„Jesus was standing in front of you?‟ I couldn‟t help interrupt.
„Yes he was right in front of me, just as you are in front of me right
now,‟ Roshan replied.
„So what does Jesus look like?‟
„It was difficult to tell. It was a very bright light and I could not see his
face directly, but he was there in front of me.‟
„How did you know it was Jesus did he tell you?‟
„I just knew that he was Jesus. He didn‟t tell me, but there was a picture
of Jesus in the calendar. I just knew that it was him. I went down on my
knees. Jesus told me that he was not happy with the way that I was
behaving, that I needed to go back to my friend and ask for forgiveness.
That I should let my friend hit me back, and that I should turn the other
cheek. He told me then that he had plans for me, but that I had to be
obedient to him. I said that I was sorry to Jesus. He talked with me a little
bit more. Then he went away. I got up from my knees and went to see
my friend and told him that I was sorry and asked him to forgive me. My
friend didn‟t believe me. I told him that he could hit me as I had hit him
and that I would turn the other cheek, that I had been wrong to beat him.
Jesus had asked me to tell him this and that is what I was doing. My
friend hit me, again and again, but I didn‟t want to hit him back. From
that day on I knew that Jesus is the true and living God, because he had
taken away my need for revenge and my anger!‟
„That is very interesting.‟ I said. Roshan looked and behaved normally.
This was the first time that I had heard of someone having a conversation
with God, and it was Jesus that he was having a conversation with!
259
 SECOND CHANCE

Neither Anand nor any of the other Gurus had mentioned having this
kind of experience, a conversation. I had never had a conversation with
God. I looked into Roshan‟s eyes. He seemed to be telling the truth. He
smiled.
„Look why don‟t you come to my Church tomorrow. Are you still in
Ahmedabad?‟ he asked. This was all a bit too weird.
„I am not sure whether we will have time. We need to go back to
Mumbai.‟
„When are you back in Ahmedabad?‟ Roshan asked.
„Maybe in the second week of January. But nothing is certain.‟
„I have your card. Is this your mobile?‟ Roshan asked looking at the
card.
„Yes it is a Mumbai number but it is roaming and works in Ahmedabad.
„I will call you in January. Nice meeting you,‟ Roshan got up and so did
his niece Mary. We shook hands and left.
„That was a very strange story,‟ I said.
„Did you believe what he said?‟ Rita asked.
„I believe that he believed what he saw. Whether that makes it real or
not is another matter. I‟ve never heard anything like that. Have you
finished? Let‟s get back to the hotel.‟
We got up and left to go to the hotel.
We got back to the room. I crashed out on the bed.
„So you got your sign from God,‟ Rita said with a big smile on her face.
„What sign are you talking about? Not the two peacocks in the field
outside 399?‟ I said.
„No silly. The pastor we met at McDonald‟s. You asked for a sign from
God. We met a priest, one of God‟s workers. That is the sign that you
asked for.‟
„He was a pastor. He was not God.‟
„Yes but it was very unusual. We went at a very odd time and he was
there sitting right next to us. Meeting a Christian priest in Ahmedabad in
a McDonald‟s at 3pm is odd. Don‟t you remember calling me up in
London all the way from Bangalore and Delhi going on about there is no
such thing as a coincidence? You were quoting that Clandestine Prophecy
book. Where has all that gone? This is the sign that you asked for. We are
meant to be in Ahmedabad.‟
„It was the Celestine Prophecy.‟
„Celestine, clandestine, what does it matter? We have got the sign. Now
we must act!‟
„Okay. Let me call Shrenik at 399, I‟ll ask him about Milan and the
apartment. He‟ll be home in the evening. I have to sleep a little. Coming
back to Ahmedabad is not what I expected,‟ I replied and soon fell
asleep.

260
 WHERE NEXT?

Several hours later I got up and spoke to Shrenik. He told me to be

careful in dealing with Milan. He told me that the furniture in the
apartment didn‟t belong to Milan and that it was under dispute with the
previous tenant, the Ahmedabad Gas Company who had rented out the
apartment for their Managing Director. I thanked him for the
information and phoned Milan. Milan said that was the case but he was in
negotiations with Ahmedabad Gas Company and he couldn‟t see any
foreseeable problems and that‟s why he hadn‟t mentioned it at the time.
„Rita, it looks as if there are some severe problems with 399. Milan is
not being completely upfront with us. What do you want to do?‟
„I really like that place and I am not too excited with the other places.‟
„Okay. I have an idea. Let‟s pray to God again.‟
„We can do that, as long as you are going to listen to what he has to say.‟
Rita and I went down on our knees and I prayed once again.
„God if you really want us to stay in Ahmedabad, and it was you that
sent us the sign of the pastor meeting us in McDonald‟s, then please
confirm that you want us to stay in Ahmedabad by ensuring that we get
flat A4 in Apartment 399, Bodakdev. If we get that place then we will
stay in Ahmedabad for one year.‟
I phoned Shrenik and told him that I was interested in the flat A4, but
that I wanted to make sure that I was not going to get mixed up in any
legal proceedings between Milan and the Ahmedabad Gas Company. The
next day Rita and I were back in Mumbai.
A week later everything was sorted out and we agreed terms and
conditions with Milan and had signed the contract. Two weeks later just
after the New Year we were moving into apartment 399 in Ahmedabad.
Perhaps it was where God wanted us to be.

261
SECOND CHANCE

262
 18 FAITH CHURCH

Rita and I moved into A4, Apartment 399, Bodakdev, Ahmedabad in

Gujarat in the first week of January. I was not sure what I was going to
do in Ahmedabad for the next year, neither was Rita, even though it had
been her decision to come to Ahmedabad. At least we had our friends
nearby; our neighbours Samit and Rahul, and of course Anand my former
Reiki guru. They were all happy to see us.
The apartment had been vacant for almost a year. A lot of dust had
gathered inside. Ahmedabad was on the edge of the great desert of Kutch
in Gujarat, known as the Raan of Kutch. The soil was very sandy, very
small particles that were easily picked up by the wind and could penetrate
through the finest of window nets. Every morning there would be a fine
layer of dust covering the entire floor, the whole house needed sweeping
and cleaning twice a day to keep the sand and dust away. Nita, Samit‟s
wife, our next door neighbour put us in contact with a young man called
Suresh from Rajasthan, the state that borders Gujarat. He was their
servant‟s nephew. It was best to get hold of a close relative of someone
who was already working at one of your friend‟s places, that way you
were somewhat sure that you had someone trust worthy working for you.
Rita „interviewed‟ Suresh wasn‟t that experienced but seemed to be
quiet and sensible. Rita gave him the job, he would live with us, in the
small room next to the kitchen, and it had its own shower and toilet. The
going rate for a live in Ahmedabad, who did the cleaning but not the
cooking was Rs1700 a month about £25. I know it seems a criminally low
amount to pay someone to be cleaning and helping around the house all
day. But that was the going rate.
I‟ll explain why it was so low and why Suresh was happy with the salary.
He would only have to work 3-4 hours a day and he was out of the heat
in a nicely air conditioned home, with his food and accommodation
263
 SECOND CHANCE

provided for. His alternative was to stay in his village in Rajasthan, where
there were no jobs, or stand with another 300 people at Naranpura every
morning in the hope that somebody would come along and give him a
job for the day. If Suresh was lucky to be selected he would get Rs100 for
the day, £1.20, or up to Rs250 if he had a specialised skill like carpentry
or bricklaying. For the Rs100 he would have to work outside in the heat
all day for up to 12 hours and pay for his own meal, and sleep rough on
the pavement or unoccupied land at night. It was an extremely difficult
life. I wanted to pay more but it would have upset the delicate pay scale
within the apartment block. Suresh‟s uncle would have become unhappy
and demanded more from Nita, it would have caused a lot of
disharmony.
Suresh‟s mother was planning to get him married the next year and had
sent him to Ahmedabad to get a job to save up for the wedding. His
mother would choose his bride, a girl from the same village or one that
was nearby. Suresh was dark, about 5foot 4, broad shoulders and large
hands, he had a tremendous appetite, eating twice as much as myself and
Rita put together. Despite his large food intake he remained relatively
slim. He had a square face and a nice large smile, he would often say
„khabhar nee‟, meaning I don‟t know. This was usually accompanied by a
smile and girlish shyness which was manifested by him cocking his head
to one side and lifting up his hand to his mouth to cover it, and turning
his body away from you. He was often in this position as there were a lot
of things that were „khabar nee‟. Suresh was a good worker and in a day
or two under Rita‟s able supervision, had the place cleaned up.
Several days after moving in I got a call in the afternoon, it was
someone from Ahmedabad.
„Hello Arjuna speaking.‟
„Oh hello, this is Roshan speaking. We met at McDonald‟s about a
month ago. How are you?‟
I remembered that I had told Roshan that we would be back in
Ahmedabad around this time. I thought it odd that he had taken note to
remember such a detail, especially as we had only met for the first time.
„Yes I remember. I am fine. I am surprised that you remembered my
number.‟
„I was just tidying up at home and I came across the card that you gave
me, I thought why not give you a call. Where are you, are you in
Ahmedabad?‟ Roshan asked.
„Yes. I am in Ahmedabad. I just moved in a couple of days ago. Your
timing is very good.‟
„Are you free this evening?‟ He asked.
„Yes we are free, but let me check with Rita.‟
„I would like to take you out for dinner, you and your wife.‟
„That is very kind of you. You really don‟t have to.‟
264
 FAITH CHURCH

„No, it will by pleasure. A way of making you welcome in Ahmedabad.‟

„Okay, let me check with Rita and then I‟ll call you back to confirm.
What is your number?‟
„My number is 747 7447,‟ replied Roshan.
„That is a very easy number to remember,‟ I remarked.
„Yes I was very blessed to receive this number.‟
„I‟ll call you back in 5-10 minutes, after checking with Rita.‟
„Okay. I am waiting for your call,‟ with that Roshan put the phone
down.
I found Rita she was up on the roof together with Suresh hanging up
some clothes to dry. The apartment had a flat tiled roof, about 30 feet in
length and 20 feet wide, ideal for throwing parties.
„You won‟t guess who just called,‟ I said to Rita.
„Who was it?‟ she asked.
„It was Roshan.‟
„Roshan?‟
„Yes, don‟t you remember the priest that we met at McDonald‟s? He
was with his niece. The reason why ended up coming to Ahmedabad.‟
„I remember the priest and his niece. I had forgotten the names. So
what did he want?‟
„He wants to take us out for dinner tonight. I said that we were free but
that I would check with you.‟
„Why does he want to take us out? He doesn‟t even know us.‟
„I don‟t know. He said that he wanted to welcome us to Ahmedabad.‟
„Sounds very odd to me. He probably wants something. Tell him that
we are busy.‟
„Come on Rita, you‟re so suspicious of everyone. He just wants to take
us out for a meal, what can he possibly end up doing? Anyway you‟ll be
there with me to protect me from falling prey to any schemes that he
might have,‟ I argued.
„You have already made up your mind. Why did you bother asking me?
You are going to go anyway,‟ she was getting upset.
„We are a team, darling. We do things together. I told Roshan that I
would check with you. I am just explaining to you why I think that we
should go. Where‟s the harm?‟
„Okay. We‟ll go. But don‟t commit to anything. Find out what he is up
to.‟
„That is why I am taking you. You can find out what he is up to. I can‟t
to do that as well as you can.‟
I phoned Roshan, he would come to our place at 7 that evening and
then we would go out to eat. Rita and I were ready waiting from 7. At
7:20 we heard a loud rumbling sound and an intermittent banging noise. I
looked out of the window and wondered what the noise could be.

265
 SECOND CHANCE

„It‟s someone on a motorbike,‟ I said to Rita. „He‟s coming here. I think

its Roshan.‟
Several minutes later, there was a knock at the door. It was Roshan who
had been riding that very noisy motorbike.
„I‟m sorry I‟m late. My son was not feeling very well and he wanted me
to read him a story,‟ said Roshan rather apologetically.
„I didn‟t know that you had children. You should have brought them
along,‟ I said
„Yes I have a boy and a baby girl. They are with their mother and a little
too young to come out for dinner,‟ replied Roshan.
„We would love to meet them. What are their names?‟
„My boy‟s name is Gabriel and my daughter‟s name is Hannah, and my
wife‟s name is Roshni,‟ Roshan chuckled when he said Roshni.
„Your wife‟s name is Roshni? Roshan and Roshni that‟s very unusual, is
that why you married her?‟ I asked. (Both Roshan and Roshni mean
light, Roshan is the boys name and Roshni is the girl equivalent.)
„No, no. But everyone asks me the same question. It is one of those
coincidences that seem so strange that it looks as if somebody has
planned it. Of course somebody has planned it. It‟s God that plans all
things.‟
„I would agree with you. Where are we going?‟ I asked.
„What kind of food would you like?‟ Roshan asked.
I looked at Rita. She gave me the sign for me to choose.
„Well we are in Ahmedabad, so let‟s have something that is typical. Last
time we had McDonald‟s, we can eat that in London also. Let‟s go and
have typical Gujarati food. I remember there being a restaurant that was
highly recommended. I can‟t quite recall the name, something beginning
with V.‟
„Is it Vaishala?‟ asked Roshan.
„Yes it could be. You have to sit down on the floor. It has a very typical
village atmosphere,‟ I replied.
„Yes that is Vaishala. We will go there.‟
The restaurant was a twenty minute drive away along the highway. It
was set on a farm. A cleared path led from the road into the farm. It was
very dark with lots of small bushes and trees either side. The path was
dimly lit by oil lanterns. It took a couple of minutes to get to the
entrance. At the entrance was a wooden kiosk. A man dressed in a white
dhoti and turban, the traditional attire of people in the village, greeted us
in Gujarati.
„Kamsho. Tamay katla jana shey?‟ he was asking us how many were
there to dine.
Roshan told him that there were three.

266
 FAITH CHURCH

„It is a set menu. You get a bit of everything. But would you like
something extra, I can recommend the patra and the jalebi,‟ asked
Roshan.
„Patra is my favourite, and Arjuna really likes Jalebi‟, replied Rita.

Roshan ordered the Patra, Jalebi and three coconut waters. The
gentleman behind the counter took the money and gave Roshan the
receipt.
„We will have to wait until the food is ready. They will then call us. We
can go inside and see a puppet show or some dancing. There is also a
museum which we can visit to see a collection of old cooking pots and
pans. Would you like to do that?‟ asked Roshan.
„I am not particularly keen on the museum. What about you Rita do you
want to see it?‟ I replied.
„No. Let‟s see the puppets and the dancing,‟ said Rita.
There was no roof to the restaurant, there were some walls but it
looked as if they were made of mud. There were a series of muddy paths
leading to various parts of the restaurant. The path that we were on
curved to the right which lead to a small clearing. There were a handful of
people sitting on several low lying „beds‟. The bed consisted of four
wooden legs about 2 feet high, supporting a wooden frame about 6 feet
in length and 3 feet wide. There were pieces of rope running along the
length and width of the frame that formed a net on which people were
seated. It looked very uncomfortable. The people were sitting in front of
a puppet stage, rectangular in shape about six feet high. The stage area
was about four foot up. A play was in progress.
We sat down on an empty bed. It was a lot more comfortable than I
expected. The play was about a husband and wife and a child. It was a
domestic comedy, unfortunately it was in Gujarati and my Gujarati was
not up to scratch to understand and appreciate the subtleties of the
language. Roshan and Rita were soon laughing away.
„Roshanbhai, Roshanbhai, Roshanbhai,‟ shouted out a man dressed in a
white dhoti and turban. Roshan stood up and indicated that he was the
one that the man was looking for. It was our coconut water. He had
brought three green coconuts. A small hole was cut out the top of the
coconut, through which was placed a straw. It was deliciously sweet. I
was wondering what to do with the shell after I finished the coconut
water.
„Just throw it on the side. It is natural. It will naturally decay,‟ said
Roshan.
„How come there are very few mosquitoes out here,‟ I asked Roshan, a
little surprised as we were sitting outside not protected by glass windows.
„Just after sunset they burn lots of incense and dhoop which creates a
lot of smoke, it knocks out the mosquitoes. It is very effective.‟
267
 SECOND CHANCE

I looked up and could clearly see the stars in the night sky. There were
many benefits of sitting outside. The climate was perfect. I couldn‟t
imagine doing it in London, with the continual threat of rain and icy cold
winds. I was feeling sleepy; perhaps the same thing that knocked out the
mosquitoes was effecting me. I lay down on one of the empty beds,
stretched out, and was soon fast asleep.
I was woken up with shouts of „Roshanbhai, Roshanbhai, Roshanbhai,‟
I got up, Rita was staring at me.
„Arjuna always does that. He just goes to sleep just like that,‟ she said.
„I‟m so sorry, Roshan. You take us to a restaurant and I fall asleep on
you,‟ I said sheepishly.
„That‟s all right. I was busy watching the play. Come our food is ready,‟
Roshan replied.
The man who had been shouting out Roshanbhai led us to another part
of the restaurant, along a winding path. This part of the restaurant was
partly covered by a matted grass roof, placed on top of a series of criss
crossing bamboo. Underneath the natural canopy were some very low
lying wooden tables, about 18 inches of the ground. The ground was
compacted mud, however alongside the table were twelve inch wide mats.
People were sitting with their legs folded on the mats. The man motioned
us to sit down to an empty table.
„Would you like a knee support‟ asked Roshan.
„What‟s that?‟ I asked.
Roshan picked up a small wooden object that was looked like an hour
glass time piece, except that it was totally solid.
„You put it on the mat and rest your knee, on it. It is very comfortable if
you are not used to sitting cross legged,‟ said Roshan explaining the
function of the knee supports.
„I‟m okay. Would you like one darling?‟ I asked Rita.
„No I‟m okay.‟
As soon as we sat down, there was a flurry of activity, about eight
waiters all dressed in the same white costume came to the table. Each of
them was carrying something different. The first person was carrying
plates made out of dried leaves and had been stitched together by small
sticks. I wondered how it would hold all the food, without the sauces in
the curries dripping through where it had been stitched. Roshan saw me
looking at the plate.
„They are very effective. It‟s only used once; there is no need to wash
them. They are then thrown away and they naturally decompose. It is
very efficient,‟ said Roshan.
The waiter following him was carrying the patra and the jalebi. The
patra was absolutely delicious. The patras were made of layers of banana
leaves, curry paste and coconut, rapped into a tight swiss roll and
268
 FAITH CHURCH

steamed. The jalebis were even more mouth watering, deep fried dough
dipped in sugar syrup flavoured with saffron. There were twelve different
dishes, as soon as we finished one, a man would appear with a refill. It
was very tasty and extremely filling. Roshan asked about what I was up to
in India and how I liked it. Rita was carefully monitoring the
conversation. But Roshan never asked for anything. We found out a little
bit more about his family and his life. He had left college and had worked
for a while before deciding to leave work and become a full time pastor.
„Where does the money come to run the church, if you are completely
independent?‟ I asked.
„I had some money saved up and off course the people give offerings
every Sunday. The real source of income and support comes from God.
Whenever there is a need somehow, some way the money is there for the
need,‟ replied Roshan.
I could see that Rita was getting nervous.
„Why don‟t you come to the church on Sunday? I can introduce you to
some of the people there,‟ continued Roshan.
I looked at Rita.
„What time is the service?‟ I asked.
„It starts at 9:30 and finishes at 12:30. I can come to your apartment first
at say 9:00 and I can show you the way. You will find it a little bit difficult
to get to the first time. You will enjoy it.‟
„It‟s three hours?‟ I asked.
„Yes. There is a lot of singing, praying and I will be giving a message.‟
I looked at Rita. She was studiously avoiding eye contact, looking down
at her plate on the table.
„Okay we‟ll come. So you will be at our place at 9am?‟ I confirmed the
arrangements.
„Yes. Be ready as soon as I come we will have to leave,‟ said Roshan.
We finished the meal, returned home. Roshan went off on his noisy
motorbike.
„Why did you tell him that we would go to his church?‟ asked Rita.
„We are not doing anything on Sunday and he had taken us out for
dinner, I was only being polite. Anyway what is the big deal about going
to a church?‟ I asked.
„I just am not sure about him. 9 o‟clock on a Sunday is early and what
are we going to do there for three hours?‟ replied Rita.
„It will be okay. If we get bored we‟ll come back early. We‟re taking the
car. We don‟t have to stay for the whole service. We can always tell
Roshan that we had to go somewhere else,‟ I re-assured Rita.
Sunday soon arrived. We had not heard anything further from Roshan.
It was already 9:15 and Roshan had not arrived.
„Looks as if we are not going to Church after all,‟ I said to Rita.
Just then we heard the noisy clatter of Roshan‟s bike.
269
 SECOND CHANCE

„We better go down and meet him. We‟re already running late,‟ I told
Rita.
„I‟m sorry I‟m late, the kids were very slow in finishing their breakfast,
and then I realised that I needed to fill up petrol. Are you ready to go?‟
asked Roshan.
„Yes we are ready,‟ I replied, wondering shouldn‟t the Pastor be at the
church ahead of everyone else.
Roshan directed us to the Church it was in the heart of the old part of
Ahmedabad at Rika‟ad. We wouldn‟t have found it had he not been with
us. Thank fully there was very little traffic and we arrived at the church a
little after 9:35. It was a white building, but there was no sign on the
building indicating that it was a church, let alone Faith Church. I looked
at Rita, she looked back at me.
Inside the hall, which was about a hundred feet in length and forty feet
wide, there were about fifteen pews. There were about twenty people in
the building, a mixture of ages. Some were kneeling and praying others
were just sitting there on the pews. In front of the pews on the left hand
side there was a piece of string about 6 feet above the ground running
across the width of the hall. A piece of white cloth was hung from the
string, on the cloth was written Faith Church, Sunday service from 9:30
am to 12:30. To the right of the cloth was a young, very thin, man with a
moustache who was picking out a melody on an electric guitar. On the
left, on the other side of the hall were three other musicians. The bass
player was in his early twenties, and then a very small boy probably about
ten was playing the bongos, and a slightly older man in his thirties was
standing in front of the keyboard.
„Why don‟t you sit here - I will talk to you after the service,‟ said
Roshan, motioning us to sit down on the fourth pew from the front.
We sat down and Roshan continued to walk to the front of the hall.
There was another guitar at the front of the hall waiting for Roshan on a
guitar stand. Roshan and the other thin young man had a mic in front of
them. Roshan slung the guitar over his head and beamed a large smile to
his small congregation.
„Praise the LORD! Welcome everyone to the house of God for a time
of worship and praise. Who is happy today?‟ shouted Roshan into the
mic.
The young thin man standing next to him translated what Roshan had
said into Gujarati. I turned around and looked at Rita. This was
unexpected. I wondered why he was speaking in English.
Roshan raised his hand, as did everyone else, in response to his
question.
Roshan started strumming the guitar and burst into song:

‗God is great, and greatly to be prai – ai – ai –sed

270
 FAITH CHURCH

God is great, and greatly to be prai – ai – ai –sed

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hall-elu – llu- jah.‘

The beat was fast and Roshan was really enjoying playing the guitar and
singing along. The congregation were singing along, clapping their hands
and swaying from side to side along with the beat. The bass guitar, the
bongo player and the keyboard player all joined in. It was a very cheerful
sound and I was soon smiling and clapping my hands to the beat and
joining in with „Hallelujah, hallelujah, hall-elu – lu- jah..‟ Roshan repeated
the verse about four times and then went straight into another high swing
song:
‗Tera pyar hai mahan,
Tera pyar hai jahan,
Meh jo pehle murda tha
Tune daali mujhme jaan

Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar

Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar
Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Tune mere liye kya kuchh na kiya

Meri surat bigdi thi

Mera dil tha khali
Tune seencha tha khun se
Taki aaye haryali

Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar

Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar
Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Tune mere liye kya kuchh na kiya

Aaye jeevan mei khushi

Aayi abdi jindagi
Tu hai jinda shafiya
Tune ye hai kiya

Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar

Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Kyon na bolu fir mei teri jai jai kar
Jai, Jai, Kar, Jai, Jai Kar
Tune mere liye kya kuchh na kiya
271
 SECOND CHANCE

I didn‟t know what the words meant, but somehow I picked up the
lyrics and started singing. Everyone around me was singing away with big
smiles on their face. Something warm trickled down my face. I was
crying. Inside I was overwhelmed with wave upon wave of emotion. I
couldn‟t tell what kind of emotion it was, maybe it was joy. I had never
felt this way and was definitely not expecting to be letting myself go at a
church.
All the other church services that I had ever been to had been very
sombre affairs; organ music playing in the background, a regimented
trained choir singing very orderly respectful hymns. This music was
completely different. The two sounds were as different as Chuck Berry
compared to Pavarotti. Roshan and the musicians went from one song to
the next, when they stopped I looked at my watch: forty five minutes had
gone by. When the music stopped the rest of the congregation started
clapping their hands, some of them were shouting out hallelujah.
A man behind me started saying a prayer, or something, in Gujarati in a
loud deep voice. Whilst he was speaking other people in the congregation
would periodically say amen or hallelujah. I was wondering what was
going on. I looked at Rita, her eyes were a little red and her cheeks puffed
up. She had experienced what I had experienced. We held each other‟s
hand.
„Let us shout out praise and thanksgiving to our Lord Jesus Christ, as
the spirit enables us,‟ shouted out Roshan into the microphone.
The man standing behind me said something else in Gujarati. Other
people in the congregation started to speak as well. Some of them were
speaking in Gujarati, others in Hindi, but I could hear some other people
muttering and mumbling something in words which I had never heard
before. It didn‟t sound like any Indian language. This went on for a good
ten minutes. Everyone seemed to be happy and highly energised. I
wondered what kind of church we had walked into. Maybe all the
churches in India were like this.
„Please take your seats. Now is the time of testimony. Anyone who
wishes to say what God has done in their lives this week please come to
the front,‟ said Roshan.
The thin young man translated.
The man who had been standing behind me, who had been praying
loudly walked to the front together with a young girl. He took a
microphone and started to speak in Gujarati. Roshan put his hand on the
man‟s shoulder to stop him speaking and said:
„Today we have some visitors from London. I would like Brother
Michael to translate into English so that they can understand what is
being said. Thank you,‟ Roshan motioned for the man to continue, he
spoke then Michael translated.
272
 FAITH CHURCH

„Praise the Lord. Something wonderful has happened in my daughter

Rose‟s life. She is a little shy that is why she has asked me to come up
with her. But I will let her tell you what happened,‟ the man handed the
mic to her daughter. The daughter, Rose, continued to speak in Gujarati
and Michael translated.
„Praise the Lord. My father is right. The Lord Jesus Christ has done
something wonderful in my life this week. Last week I went to the
hospital to have x-rays taken. I had been suffering from headaches for the
last three months and they were getting worse and worse. After the
doctors had looked at the x-rays they told me that I had a tumour and
that they would have to operate, but they needed to do some more x-rays
and tests. My father phoned Pastor Roshan and he came to our house
and prayed that Lord Jesus would heal me. When the Pastor was praying
I felt some heat coming into my head and at the back of my head. Two
days ago I went back to the hospital to have the other tests done, I was
frightened. But a miracle had happened. The doctors told me that the
tumour was gone and that there was no need to operate. They could not
understand what had happened. But I knew that it was Jesus that had
healed me. Praise the Lord !‟
The rest of the congregation started to clap and said „Praise the Lord‟ in
unison. This was all getting very strange. I wondered whether Roshan had
set the whole thing up. There was definitely something strange going on
in Faith Church. A couple of other people went up; one man thanked
Jesus for a job and a woman thanked Jesus for helping her find a wedding
ring. Nothing as impressive as Rose‟s healing, assuming that what she was
saying was strictly true.
After the testimonies were over, Roshan stood up and spoke into the
mic again.
„Can I ask Brother Arjuna and Sister Rita to stand up, so that we as
Faith Church can give them a warm welcome,‟ Roshan motioned us to
stand up.
Rita and I stood up and looked around, everyone was looking at us and
smiling and clapping their hands.
„Thank you brother Arjuna and Sister Rita,‟ he continued, and we sat
down.
„This couple is from London and they are going to be here in
Ahmedabad for one year. A few weeks earlier I had told you all about this
couple who I met in McDonald‟s. We warmly invite the two of you to
this church and hope to see you again in the future. May God be with you
during your stay in Ahmedabad,‟ continued Roshan.
Roshan remained standing and asked everyone to go to the book of
Joshua in the Old Testament. He read out some verses and started to
explain what they meant. He spoke for an hour, but it just flew by. There
was no need for us to leave early. At the end of the service the people
273
 SECOND CHANCE

came up to us and smiled and shook our hands. They looked refreshed
and happy.
Roshan was also going around shaking everyone‟s hands and saying
„Praise the Lord.‟ He came to us last of all.
„So Arjuna did you enjoy the service ?‟ he asked.
„Yes it was not what I expected. The songs were great, not what I was
expecting to hear,‟ I replied.
„And how about you Rita, are you glad that you came?‟ Roshan asked.
„Yes, it was wonderful,‟ replied Rita.
„I hope that you will come again. Let me introduce you to a few people.
Firstly this is my wife, Roshni, and my boy Gabriel and daughter
Hannah.‟
Roshni had long dark hair, deep black eyes, and a dark complexion. She
had a large gleaming white smile on her face. She was wearing a dark blue
sari and holding a young baby girl in her hand, she looked just like a
miniature version of her mother. She held out her hand and said „Praise
the Lord!‟
I shook her delicate cool hand and replied to her in kind with „Praise
the Lord, and this is Rita.‟ Rita shook Roshni‟s hand and said.
„Praise the Lord. Is this Hannah? Can I hold her?‟
Roshni smiled and gave Hannah to Rita to hold. Hannah was smiling
away just like her mother completely at ease in a stranger‟s arms.
„And this is Gabriel,‟ said Roshan, pushing a small boy forward. He was
the same boy that was playing the bongos.
„Say „Praise the Lord!‟, son. He is a little shy,‟ continued Roshan.
Gabriel stood close to his father and held out his little hand and said
„Praise the Lord!‟
„You have a wonderful family,‟ I said to Roshan.
„Yes the Lord has truly blessed us. What are you doing for lunch? My
son, Gabriel, really likes McDonald‟s. He is just like his father, and I had
promised that I would take him after the service. Would you like to join
us?‟ asked Roshan.
„I‟m not sure,‟ I replied turning to look at Rita, who was busy playing
with Hannah.
„Roshan has invited us to McDonald‟s together with his family, darling.
Do we have other plans for this afternoon?‟ I asked Rita.
„I haven‟t cooked anything. We can go to McDonald‟s with them,‟
replied Rita.
„That‟s great. Let me introduce you to some more of the church
members,‟ said Roshan.
Roshan introduced me to Cecil, the keyboard player, Manoj the bass
player and finally to the young thin man who was doing the translating.
„This is Michael. He is my nephew. You have already met his sister,
Mary,‟ said Roshan.
274
 FAITH CHURCH

I held out my hand and said „Praise the Lord!‟ It was a highly infectious
habit. I was surprised at how quickly I had picked it up.
„Praise the Lord. My sister Mary and Pastor Roshan have told me about
you. I am so glad that you could make it today,‟ said Michael, he was
smiling while he was talking.
I briefly wondered whether they were all high from sniffing glue or
something. But they were calm and smiling, rather than being in some
frenzied out of control state of extreme euphoria.
„Where is Mary?‟ I asked.
„She is not feeling very well. But she remembers you and your wife,‟
replied Michael.
„Will you please excuse me, I have to tidy up and put away the things.
It‟s so good to meet you, please do come again.‟ Michael shook my hand
again and left to take down the Faith Church banner and the string that
was tied across the hall.
„Brother Arjuna, do you mind waiting a few minutes, while I say good
bye to my parishioners? Then we can go to McDonald‟s together,‟ asked
Roshan.
I wondered why he had started to call me Brother Arjuna.
„No problem, Roshan. Take your time,‟ I replied.
I had many questions to ask Roshan, this had not been a normal
Church service.

275
SECOND CHANCE

276
 19 SOME QUESTIONS

A few moments later, Roshan came over and handed a book to me,
saying: „Brother Arjuna, there are quite a lot of people that need praying
for, which could take some time, reading this book while you wait may
make the time go faster.‟
I took the book from his hand. Roshan went back to a group of people
that had gathered at the front of the hall. He was frequently putting his
hands on people‟s heads and praying, he did this about five times with
different people. Sometimes he would do it on his own; other times I saw
Cecil, Michael and Manoj also putting their hands on people‟s heads,
praying together with Roshan. This was going to take some time.
I opened the book and the opening page said: „All scripture is God-
breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in
righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for
every good work.‟ It then had a quotation „2 Timothy 3:16-17‟. That‟s a
very ambitious statement to make, I thought. I carried on reading:
‗READING THE WORLD‟S GREATEST STORY
The heart and soul of the Bible is its story. It is the real saga of a particular
people, how God called them and intended for them to bring blessing to all
mankind.
Story is also the word that best describes our own lives. While we may or may not
follow the right rules, investigate certain facts and attempt to live wisely, none of
these activities provides the central way we make sense of our lives. Stories give
context and provide meaning.
All the different parts of the Bible come together as one narrative.
To understand the Bible you must get to know its characters,
understand its setting and follow the plot.
277
 SECOND CHANCE

The climax and ultimate resolution will make sense only if you‘ve followed the
earlier parts of the story. Learn to feel the tension and wrestle with its major
conflict. Lose yourself in this story the way you would do with a good novel.
We present here an abbreviated version of the story of the Bible as a drama in five
acts. As with all synopses, whilst these acts give the essence of the story, we
thoroughly recommend an entire reading of the Bible from Genesis right through
Revelation to gain an in depth understanding of God‘s plan for you and all of His
creation. All scripture is God breathed, so we believe that all 66 books are equally
relevant and important to understand the ‗World‘s Greatest Story‘.
ACT I: CREATION
The drama begins with God already onstage. He is creating the world. He makes
a man and places him in the Garden of Eden to work in it and take care of it.
God‘s intention, his plan, is for humanity to be in close relationship with him and
in harmony with the rest of creation around them. God is described in these early
chapters of the Bible as dwelling in the garden together with the first human beings,
Adam and Eve. At the end of the first chapter of Genesis, God gives his own
assessment of his work:
“ God saw all that he had made and it was very good.” Genesis
1:31
Later, God‘s people celebrated God‘s creative work:
“Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all
blessing and praise. You alone are the Lord. You made the
heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the
earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You
give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship
you.” Nehemiah 9:5 - 6.
Act I reveals God‘s desire and plan for His people and provides the setting all the
action that follows.
ACT II: THE FALL
Tension is introduced in the story when Adam and Eve decided to abandon God‘s
plan and go their own way and seek their own wisdom creating their own plan
independently of God. They listen to the deceptive voice of God‘s enemy, Satan, and
doubt God‘s trustworthiness. God had already warned Adam and Eve the
consequences of going their own way. Adam and Eve chose to abandon God‘s plan
and follow Satan‘s plan. As a fair and righteous God, His only choice was to
carry out the threat of punishment. If He did not do this, He would be a God that
does not keep His word. As a result of rebellion:
“The Lord God banished him [Adam] from the Garden of Eden
to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he
278
 SOME QUESTIONS

drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of
Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to
guard the way to the tree of life.‖ Genesis 3:23-24
God‘s intention in creation is known, but part of His own creation has decided not
to follow His plan. Is there a way for humanity to stop following Satan‘s plan and
get back on to God‘s plan thereby regaining their perfect relationship with God?
Or did God‘s enemy, Satan, effectively end the plan and subvert the story for ever.
Satan‘s plan is very appealing; his plan is that we can do anything that we want to
do, to gain instant gratification. Satan, unlike God never warns us of the
consequences of following his plan, we only find out much later the consequences.
Acts I and II take only the first few pages in the Bible to be completed. Yet, they
introduce the struggle that dominates the rest the story.
ACT III: ISRAEL
„The Lord had said to Abram, “Leave your country, your people
and your father‟s household and go to the land I will show you. I
will make you into a great nation, and I will bless you; I will
make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless
those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse; and all
peoples on earth, will be blessed through you.” Genesis 12:1-3
In calling on Abram (God later renamed him Abraham) and promising to make
him into a great nation, God is narrowing his focus and concentrating on one group
of people of time. At this time God is giving an opportunity for Abraham and his
descendents to be the vehicle through which mankind will stop following Satan‘s
plan and come back to God‘s plan, thereby removing the curse from creation and
restoring the original relationship that existed in the garden.
When Abraham‘s descendants are later enslaved in Egypt, a central pattern in the
story is set: God returns to his people when they turn back to Him, He then frees
them and restores them to the land promised to them. God makes a covenant with
this new nation Israel at Mount Sinai. He appoints Moses to be their leader
during the liberation from Egypt - the Exodus. As part of the covenant, God
makes it clear that if His people remain true to him and faithfully follow His
ways, He will bless them in a new land and make it like the original Garden of
Eden.
However, if Israel is not faithful to the covenant, God warns them that he will send
them out of the land, just as he did with Adam and Eve. Note God always
makes us aware of the consequences of following His plan versus following our own
plans (which is in reality Satan‘s plan for our lives). Sadly, and in spite of God‘s
repeated warnings and pleadings, they are determined to go their own way. They
break the covenant, follow the false gods (forms of Satan) of the nations that
surround them and bring the judgement of God down upon themselves.

279
 SECOND CHANCE

Abraham‘s descendants, chosen to reverse the failure of Adam, have now

apparently failed themselves. Along the way however God has planted the seeds of
a different outcome, a plan that will get us back on track. One of Israel‘s kings,
David is noted for being a man after God‘s own heart. So God promises to send
another king to Israel is son of David, who will lead Israel wisely, and bring Israel
and all of the nations back to God. So while Act III ends tragically, with God
apparently absent, the hope of a promise remains.
ACT IV: JESUS
Approximately 1000 years after the reign of King David, the people of Israel are
suffering under Roman occupation and waiting for God to return. They
misunderstand that this new king, a descendent of David, would also be an earthly
king. However, God has a different way of implementing His plan. An angel of
God comes to a young woman named Mary and announces: ―
“You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to
give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the
son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of
his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob
forever; his kingdom will never end.” Luke 1:31-33
Jesus‘ arrival is introduced with the claim that God is keeping His promise. So
Jesus begins his mission. He heals sickness and disease among the people. He
confronts God‘s enemies in the spiritual realm, the demons (Satan‘s minions), and
forcefully orders them to leave the people whom they torment. Jesus forgives the sins
of those who humbly come to him. He proclaims the gospel, or good news that:
“The time has come. The kingdom of God is near, repent and
believe the good news.” Mark 1:15.
The very heart of Jesus‘ message is a good news of the coming of God‘s reign. God
is making another way for His people to dwell with Him. This is why Jesus has
called Emmanuel, which means ―God with us‖.
But Jesus‘ message receives mixed responses. This is partly understandable, because
people are expecting God to send a king, and not the poor son of a carpenter from
a little village. Some people believe, and out of these Jesus chooses twelve disciples or
followers. But most people simply watch him with amazement, never knowing quite
what to make of him. The established religious leaders quickly become hostile
toward him. Eventually this conflict escalates to the breaking point and the
religious leaders conspire to have Jesus arrested and killed on a cross, because they
believe that Jesus‘ claim that he is God is the greatest form of blasphemy which
deserves the ultimate punishment, a painful death by crucifixion.
But this defeat is actually God‘s greatest victory. Jesus‘ death turns the tables on
God‘s enemy (Satan) and turns the world upside down. By willingly giving up his

280
 SOME QUESTIONS

life as a sacrifice, Jesus takes onto himself God‘s judgement for our wrongdoing. As
the early Christian leader Paul later wrote.
“God made your life with Christ. He forgave us all our sins,
having cancelled the written code, with its regulations, that was
against us and stood opposed to us; He took it away nailing it to
the cross. And having disarmed the powers and authorities
[Satan and his demons], He made a public spectacle of them,
triumphing over them by the cross.” Colossians 2:13-15
Jesus speaks the message of God as Israel‘s true prophet. He defeats the very power
behind all the evil as Israel‘s true king, the son of David. He gives up his own life
as a sacrifice for His people as Israel‘s true priest. He leads his people to a new
Exodus, through death to a new life. In all of this Jesus shows Himself to be the
promised child of Abraham who reconciles humanity with God. It is through Jesus
that Israel can finally fulfil its role, the purpose for which God called Abraham.
This account of Jesus is a focal point of the Bibles inside story. The key struggle
with God‘s enemy (Satan), the desperate attempts to correct man‘s wrong choices,
comes to a head in the life of Jesus. He is the one and only hero of the story.
ACT V: THE NEW PEOPLE OF GOD
If the key victory has already been secured, why is there an Act V? God wants the
victory of Jesus to spread to all the nations of the world. Those who follow Jesus
and His teachings are being built into God‘s new temple, the place where God‘s
Spirit lives. God is gathering these people from all around the world and forming
them into his elected representatives. When this is complete, Jesus will return and
the reign of God will become a reality throughout God‘s creation (I Corinthians
15:24-25). The resulting curses of following our own plans will be removed
(Revelation 22:3).
The task of bringing blessing to the peoples the world has been given again to the
descendants of Abraham. According to the New Testament, all those who belong
to Christ are true children of Abraham (Galatians 3:29). Act V emphasises the
mission of Christ followers: to proclaim and live out the liberating message of the
good news of Christ‘s kingdom.
Act V moves through history to our own time, enveloping us in its drama. The
message of Christ and his kingdom has now come to us. The challenge of a decision
now confronts us to. What will we do, how will we fit into the story?
The story of the Bible is the true account of the central conflict winding its way
through the history of the world. Will we be part of God‘s plan of re-creation - of
restoring the world around us and making the world including ourselves new, or
will we choose to stay on the plan that we have devised and are already following.
WHAT NOW?

281
 SECOND CHANCE

The most important thing you can do is to read the Bible Scriptures carefully.
God‘s spirit uses them actively and powerfully to accomplish His purposes in you
and through you to impact the world. Jesus says:
“And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another
Counsellor to be with you forever: the spirit of truth. The world
cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him.
But you know him for he lives with you and will be in you.” John
14:16-17
“But the Counsellor, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send
in my name, will teach you all things and remind you of
everything I have said to you.” John 14:26
The Bible is not necessarily an easy book to read. Some passages are difficult for
everyone to understand. This is because one needs the Holy Spirit of God to make
them understandable. However, if you are committed to learning more about God
and the story He‘s given us in the Bible, then ask God for his Holy Spirit to help
you understand His word. The Holy Spirit through the Bible which is the word of
God will guide you, change you, and keep you on God‘s plan for your life.
FINDING YOUR PLACE IN THE STORY
The story of Jesus offers a new beginning for humanity and confronts each of us
with personal choice. We can either choose to get back on track with God‘s original
plan, or continue to follow our plans (the choice that Satan offered us). It is a free
choice. There is no compulsion by God, as to which choice you make. However,
there are consequences of the choices that we make. Jesus says:
“ I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me
and I in him he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do
nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch
that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up
and thrown into the fire and burned.” John 15:5-6
What fire is Jesus is talking about? This is elaborated in the book of Revelations:
―Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. Earth and sky
fled from his presence, and there was no place for them. And I saw the dead, great
and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was
opened and is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had
done as recorded in the books. The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death
and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged
according to what he had done. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake
of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. If anyone‘s name was not founded
written in the book of life; he was thrown into the lake of fire.‖ Revelations 20:11-
15

282
 SOME QUESTIONS

If you haven‘t begun to follow the way that Jesus provided for restoring a
relationship with and getting back to the original plan of God, then this section
will help you to understand what this means and how to get back on track. If
you‘re following Jesus these ideas are valuable in helping you realise what you have
been given through Christ.
Soon after Christ had given his mission to his followers and returned to heaven,
Peter, who was a disciple of Jesus and a leader in the early church was speaking to
a gathering of Jews. He recounts the story of Jesus‘ life, death and resurrection and
challenges them to make the right response to what God has done. Those who were
listening to Peter asked what ought we to do to get back on track:
“Peter replied, “Repent and be baptised, every one of you, in the
name of Jesus Christ of the forgiveness of your sins. And you
will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. That promise is for you
and your children and for all who are far off; for all whom the
Lord our God will call.” Acts 2:38-39.
“Indeed, all the prophets from Samuel on, as many as have
spoken, have foretold these days. And you are heirs of the
prophets and of the covenant God made with your fathers. He
said to Abraham, “Through your offspring all peoples on earth
will be blessed.”When God raised up his servant [Jesus], he sent
him first to you to bless you by turning each of you from your
wicked ways.” Acts 3:24-26
Peter connects Jesus‘ sacrifice to the ancient promise made to Abraham. He makes
clear that now is the time for the blessing to occur. God has made a way for you to
turn away from your wrong path and return to him as his son or daughter of
Adam. You were born separated from God, unaware of the close trusting
relationship he desires to have with you. Jesus is the one, through his sacrifice on the
cross, who can bring you back to God. Your sins can be forgiven, and your life can
be renewed when you personally accept Christ‘s sacrifice on your behalf. As John‘s
account of the story of Jesus puts it:
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son,
that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal
life.” John 3:16
Your life story can be rewritten within the storyline of the Bible. You can join with
God‘s people that are following God‘s plan from all over the world who are living
out Act V today. For this to happen, though, you must turn away from your sins,
from the plan that you are currently following, and commit to trust and follow Jesus
to get back onto the plan that God had always wished for each and every one of us
to be on.‖
That was the end of a rather long summary. I did not understand most
of what I had read. As I finished the introduction Roshan appeared and
283
 SECOND CHANCE

rather apologetically said, „so sorry, brother Arjuna for keeping you
waiting so long, shall we go now?‟ I was relieved to go, the book had
raised more questions than it had answered.
We eventually got to the McDonald‟s, collected our Happy Meals for
the kids and Extra Value Meals for the adults and sat down.
„Brother Arjuna, do you notice something about this place?‟ asked
Roshan.
I looked around but couldn‟t notice anything. I was trying to see
whether they had changed the décor or something, but it all seemed to be
the same as the last time.
„We are sitting in the same place that we sat when we first met you,‟ said
Rita.
„My, my brother you have a very clever wife,‟ chuckled Roshan, with his
customary smile.
I was about to dig into my McChicken sandwich when Roshan said.
„Brother shall we pray first?‟
„Ah yes sorry. Of course we can,‟ I replied a little embarrassed at my
haste.
„Gabriel can you say grace for us,‟ I was surprised that Roshan was
asking his son to pray he was only nine, maybe ten at the most.
„Our Lord Father in heaven,‟ said Gabriel, „thank you for the service
this morning. Thank you for this tasty food that you have laid out before
us. Please bless this food, the hands that have prepared and provided for
this food. Please bless Uncle Arjuna and Aunty Rita. In the name of Jesus
Christ I pray. Amen.‟ His father and mother said Amen in unison at the
end of his prayer.
„Thank-you Gabriel,‟ said Rita, „that was very sweet of you.‟ She reached
out and gave Gabriel a hug. Gabriel smiled and blushed. He was shy, just
as his father had said.
„So brother Arjuna, you liked the service?‟ asked Roshan.
„Yes I did like it; especially the songs,‟ I replied, „it was very different to
what I was expecting.‟
„Yes I was watching you and Rita. I was very happy to see and hear, you
singing to them.‟
I wondered whether or not to tell Roshan what I had felt. This was only
the third time that we had met, and the first time with his wife Roshni.
On the other hand, when else would I get the opportunity? We
continued eating in silence for the next several minutes. Roshan and
Roshni seemed to be comfortable with the silence, busy eating away,
feeding Hannah and smiling at each other and at their children.
„I felt something when you sang the second song. I don‟t know what it
meant, but I was really moved,‟ I said. The silence was making me
uncomfortable.

284
 SOME QUESTIONS

„That sometimes happens. You felt the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit was
very strong this morning in the church,‟ replied Roshan.
„The Holy Spirit? You talked about it the first time we met and the
book that you gave me kept on mentioning it, but I still don‟t quite
understand it. You said that it was the spirit of God.‟
„Yes it is the spirit of God. Our Lord Jesus promised that he would
send the spirit to us after he had ascended to heaven. Then on the fiftieth
day, on the day of Pentecost, after his crucifixion he sent the Holy Spirit.
Jesus‟ followers were all with one another in a room, and the Spirit came
down on them and they were filled with Jesus‟ love and power. The Holy
Spirit is the spirit of love, that is what you felt. You are very blessed,
brother Arjuna, that God chose to reveal his Love to you,‟ said Roshan.
„What do you mean that God chose to reveal his Love to me?‟ I asked.
„You see we are in darkness, we are away from God, and we do not
really know who or what God is, nor can we feel his presence. We are
continually wandering around without light. Not really knowing the truth
or what is going on. It is only when God chooses to shine the light of his
love on you that you actually realise that you are in a dark lonely place,‟
explained Roshan.
„You mean to say that I am in darkness all alone, and that you are in the
light in the presence of God? That book you gave me kept on going
about me being on my own plan, and not on God‟s plan. So are you
telling me that you are on God‟s plan and that I am not?‟ I was getting a
little annoyed that Roshan was making out that he was superior to me.
I had always had this problem at school and at university. Christians
have this highly irritating „holier than thou attitude‟ about them. Most of
them were complete hypocrites and losers. Roshan was turning out to be
the same.
Roshan smiled. „I was also in darkness and also on my own plan. I was
being deceived by Satan, believing that I was on a plan and path that
would lead to happiness. I had been in darkness for a very long time. It
was only when Jesus shone his light on me, when I was in my room
feeling sorry for myself that I realised that I was in darkness and on the
wrong path. My mother was a Christian she used to go to church and
everything, but that made no difference to me. We are all born in
darkness following the wrong plan, all alone, and continue in dark
solitude, until by the grace of God he decides to reveal himself to us.
God reveals himself to the people of his choice. It has absolutely nothing
to do with how good or bad you are, your level of education, or your
wealth, or the country of your birth, or whether or not your parents call
themselves Christian. We are all born into darkness and there we stay
until the day that the light shines on you. Today the light shone on you
and you felt the love of the Holy Spirit. You are blessed that you felt the
love,‟ he explained.
285
 SECOND CHANCE

„So why are we all in darkness? Why has God left us in the dark all
alone, why would he do such a thing?‟
It seemed odd that a so called loving God would not only banish us,
but allow us to be in the dark.
„God has not put us in darkness,‟ replied Roshan, „it is we who have put
ourselves in darkness. We have chosen the path that is in darkness and
away from God, rather than in light and stay in his presence. We have
chosen to do things our way and not God‟s way. God created this
universe, a perfect universe, and gave us a set of instructions as to how to
live in peace and harmony. But we decided not to follow the operating
instructions and decided to do things our way. The result is this mess that
we are now living in. I will give you an example. The manufacturer of
your car has given a set of instructions on how to best operate it, when to
change gear, how often to change the oil, how and when to brake. Now if
you follow their instructions then you will be driving safely and your car
will last. If however, you decide to drive it your way, disregarding the
makers instructions then you are likely to get into trouble.‟
„But I didn‟t choose to be in darkness,‟ I protested, „you say that I was
born in darkness. I was just a baby. I couldn‟t make a choice. I don‟t
remember choosing to go into darkness, and I am perfectly sure that if I
was given the choice between darkness and light, I would have chosen
light.‟ There was a flaw in Roshan‟s logic.
Roshan looked at me and continued sipping his milkshake. He didn‟t
reply straight away. I had got him, his logic was flawed. But Roshan
wasn‟t finished.
„Actually you did end up making a choice, but you may have been
unaware of it. Even as a baby you would have had feelings of anger and
jealousy, you wanted everything for yourself, your actions and behaviours
were totally centred around you,‟ replied Roshan.
„But, this is a natural response. If a baby isn‟t self centred and doesn‟t
scream out for milk or food it won‟t be fed, it will die. It is a natural self
preservation instinct,‟ I answered, getting increasingly irritated.
„Who fed you then and who feeds you know?‟ asked Roshan.
„My mother fed me then, and now Rita cooks for me most of the time,
occasionally we go out,‟ I replied.
„Rita knows when you will be hungry, don‟t you think your mother
knew when you would be hungry, when you would be tired, when you
needed to play and sleep. A mother knows all these things, babies do not
need to yell and scream to get attention. They have the love and attention
of their mother and father. If they don‟t have that they are in trouble
anyway. Even as a baby you made a choice of how to behave.‟
I thought about what Roshan said. I knew that I did have feelings of
jealousy towards my baby brother when he was born, about fifteen
months after me. I loved him also, but was a little resentful that I was no
286
 SOME QUESTIONS

longer the centre of attention. I did have those feelings. I could have
chosen to just love him, and accept things how they were. My Mum and
Dad continued to love me. There was enough love for both of us.
Roshan was partly right, but not totally.
„But I didn‟t choose to behave that way. It was instinct that made me
behave that way. It is a natural response. We all behave that way,‟ I
argued.
„That is exactly the point. It is in our nature to behave that way, when
we choose to get angry and choose to be jealous rather than be full of
forgiveness and love we are going against God‟s way and going our way.
Our natural way is in defiance and contrary to God‟s way. If we were in
the light from the beginning we would have always been forgiving and
loving, we would never be angry or feel jealousy or act selfishly. We
would not be driven by fear, but by love. But we do behave that way,
driven by fear and our insecurities. That is the definition of darkness.‟
Roshan did have a point. His choice of the word darkness had upset me
at first. However, if he chose to define darkness as acting in a way that
was sometimes driven by jealousy, anger, or I guess fear, then I would
have to agree with him that I was in darkness, according to his definition.
But, I was not ready to accept his definition of darkness. I decided to
humour him and go along with his definition for the time being.
„Okay so we are in darkness, how do we get out of it?‟ I asked.
„This was a question that many people asked the disciples once they
understood that they were in darkness. The answer is to repent, be
baptised in the name of Jesus Christ and pray to receive the Holy Spirit,‟
replied Roshan.
„That‟s what that book said but I don‟t fully understand what you mean
by that,‟ I said.
„I will gladly explain. Repent means to change your thinking. The first
step is to change your direction from darkness to light, to realise and
admit that you are in darkness, in rebellion towards God, and make a
commitment to follow and walk in the light. You are deciding to
surrender yourself to God‟s way, to no longer act in rebellion. When you
repent you are saying that you are willing for the Spirit of Jesus, the Holy
Spirit to come and take over your life. From this point on you are
surrendering your will, your way to God‟s will and the way of the Holy
Spirit,‟ explained Roshan.
Some of the things that I had heard people talk about at University
were beginning to slowly make sense.
„Is this what people mean by giving my life to Jesus?‟ I asked.
„Yes that is what people mean. They are repenting and they should be
truly surrendering themselves to Jesus. Unfortunately not many people
totally surrender themselves to Jesus.‟
„Okay so what about being born again. What does that mean?‟ I asked.
287
 SECOND CHANCE

„Those are the next two steps. The first step is to be baptised in name
of Jesus Christ. When you get baptised you are immersed in water. This
signifies that you are willing to bury your old self and that you wish to
take new life. In the same way that Jesus died and was buried and then
was resurrected on the third day. You are imitating and following Jesus‟
footsteps.‟
„Hold on there for one moment. Why do I have to imitate and follow
Jesus‟ footsteps and die?‟
„That is a very good question. You see we have chosen to be in
darkness and we stay in darkness by the consequences of our choices,
going against God. You know that if you disobey the law, the police will
catch you and punish you by putting you in jail. God is supremely just
and fair. If we continue to go against him, against the laws that he has set
down for us, then we will be punished.‟
„You have been talking about laws, and punishment, what laws are you
talking about? This is getting very complicated and confusing.‟
„There were a set of laws that were handed by God to Moses, those are
the ten commandments. Jesus summed up those laws as simply to love
God, and love one another. The first four commandments are specific
examples of the principle of loving God, and the remaining six
commandments are specific examples of principle of loving one another.
We have to love our enemies and put others first. That is all that we have
to do. Although these laws were codified in tablets of stone, they are also
programmed into our hearts from birth. We all know that it is wrong to
murder, steal and lie, this is because God‟s laws are known to us, whether
we admit it or not.‟
I could see why loving others was a good thing to do, but it seemed odd
to have loving God, on an equal footing and a mandatory requirement.
„Okay I do agree that if we were to love one another, then the world
would be a better place. But why is it so important to love God. Isn‟t
God being rather demanding to ask that we love him?‟
„Let me ask you a question.‟
„Go right ahead.‟
„If you were going to spend a long time with someone, and you had a
group of people to choose from, then wouldn‟t you choose those that
really liked you and loved you for who you were, rather than those people
that were indifferent or hostile towards you?‟
„Yes I would pick those people that loved me,‟ I replied.
„Well God is choosing those people that are going to spend eternity
with him. If you were God and you could choose anyone that you wanted
then wouldn‟t you choose those people that loved you, and loved others?
So that they would get on in harmony with you and the other people that
are in eternity together with you?‟ reasoned Roshan.

288
 SOME QUESTIONS

„That does seem reasonable. But what if I don‟t want to be with God,
and follow his rules?‟
„You don‟t have to be with God if you don‟t want to. You don‟t have to
follow the rules that God sets, you can do what you like. All that I am
saying is that the consequences of following God‟s law, loving God and
loving others will mean that you have eternal life, if you don‟t then there
is no eternal life.‟
„Okay so that is what you mean by the law. But tell me why Jesus had to
die, and why do I have to follow in his footsteps?‟ I asked.
„Before I answer that question, can I ask you another question?‟
„Sure go ahead.‟
„If we consider these two laws, loving God and loving everyone else,
without anger, jealousy, envy and forgiveness, have you been obeying
these laws fully?‟ asked Roshan.
I pondered for a while.
„I just don‟t agree with how you are defining the laws. I would say that I
am not against God and that I am good to other people. I am obeying the
laws.‟
„I am sure that you are. But I am asking whether you are meeting the
standard of never getting angry, being full of love for your enemies,
always forgiving, never having envy. Do you meet that standard ?‟
I was reluctant to say it.
„No I don‟t. But nobody does,‟ I replied.
„Yes that is right. I don‟t either and I can never hope to. But there is
one man who has met that standard, and that was Jesus. The reason why
he was able to meet the standard is that he was directly God‟s son. He did
not have an earthly father. So he did not inherit our worldly nature, but
he inherited a godly nature, a nature that is full of love. I want to make a
small diversion if I may, Arjuna, and explain a concept that is often
misunderstood, may I ?‟
„Go ahead.‟
„I want to just explain what is sin and who is a sinner,‟ continued
Roshan, „sin is defined as falling short of the standard that God has set. A
sinner is anyone who falls short of God‟s standard as described in the
Holy Bible, and exemplified by Jesus Christ. We think we are not sinners
because we meet a standard of behaviour that we have set for ourselves,
which is usually the average standard followed by the society which we
live in. This standard is quite low, and you probably exceed that standard.
But, that is not the standard against which we are measured by God.
There is a standard which is an absolute standard against which all
mankind is measured against. This absolute standard was set by Jesus
Christ by the way in which he lived his life, which also happened to be in
complete agreement with what he commanded each and everyone of us
to do. So Arjuna, are you as good as Jesus? Because, if you are then you
289
 SECOND CHANCE

are not a sinner. If you are not as good as Jesus then you are, by God‟s
definition, a sinner.‟
But there is no one that I have ever met that meets Jesus‟ standards. It
seems to be a nonsensical standard to set. Besides which I still don‟t
understand why Jesus had to die, and if he was God‟s son, why did God
let him die in such a cruel and horrible way? It seems like a very sick thing
for God to do.‟ I couldn‟t see how Roshan was going to get out of the
muddle that he was getting himself into.
„I am coming to that point,‟ said Roshan calmly.
„You agree that nobody meets the standard that God has set?‟
continued Roshan.
„Yes, but I don‟t necessarily agree that God has set that standard, but
assume that I do for the time being. It‟s getting late and I am sure that
Roshni has things to do at home, and we need to get back home soon to.‟
„I am okay,‟ said Roshni.
„Me too,‟ replied Rita.
„I will not take much longer. We can carry on this conversation some
other time. You have got some very good questions, and I can see that
you are someone who likes to be thorough. God knew that none of us
can meet his standard, and that as a consequence none of us would pass
his selection criteria of loving him and loving others, and if we didn‟t
make it then everlasting punishment in a lake of fire is what awaits us.
God sent Jesus to make a path for us, back to God through Jesus. Jesus
did meet God‟s criteria, but he willingly agreed that he would die instead
of us and bear our punishment, death, so that we might have the
opportunity to be with God for eternity in spirit.‟
This lake of fire nonsense was getting me really annoyed.
Roshan continued, „Arjuna if you had a son and he committed a crime,
and you knew that your son did it because he was ignorant of what he
was doing, and that it was possible for you to take his punishment instead
of him. Would you not offer yourself up and let him go free, recognising
that he really had no idea what he was doing at the time ?‟
„I guess I would under those circumstances,‟ I replied.
„Well the same situation is true for God. He knows that we do all of
these things partly because we have no idea that what we are doing is
wrong. He knows that we are in darkness and don‟t even realise that we
are in darkness, that is why we do the things that we are not meant to do.
So he came in human form, as Jesus, to die instead of us and suffer the
punishment for us. So when people get baptised they are acknowledging
that Jesus died and was buried and came back to life. So that they also
realise that their old self needs to die before they can start afresh and
commit to walk in God‟s way.‟
I understood what Roshan was saying, but it didn‟t make sense, it was a
strange thing for God to do. Besides I didn‟t fundamentally agree about
290
 SOME QUESTIONS

the standard that God had set, why would he set a standard that wasn‟t
achievable, that would result in us spending eternity suffering in a lake of
fire?
„Okay. So what about the Holy Spirit?‟ I asked.
„After you have buried your old self, you start from a clean sheet as
God has forgiven you of all the things that you have done. To stay on
track, Jesus promised to send his Holy Spirit as an advisor to help you
obey God‟s laws. He did this because he knew that if you tried to do it on
your own you would end up falling short of God‟s standard and be back
in darkness. You need to pray to receive the Holy Spirit, and the Holy
Spirit only comes once God judges that you have truly repented and are
committed to do things his way rather than your way.‟
„I am still not sure that I really understand what the Holy Spirit is,‟ I was
not getting very clear answers. Each answer was raising a lot more
questions.
„This is a big topic, and it is getting late. Do you like to read?‟ asked
Roshan.
„Yes I love to read,‟ I replied.
„The New Testament that I gave you talks about the Holy Spirit, and
there are many books that focus solely on the Holy Spirit. I suggest that
you read them and then if you have any questions then we can meet
again. There is a very good Christian Book shop here in Ahmedabad.
Michael knows where it is. This is Michael‟s number, call him up and he
will take you to the book shop.‟
„That sounds like a good idea.‟
„Would you like some ice cream?‟ asked Roshan.
I refused Roshan‟s offer as it was getting late. Rita and I left for home. I
didn‟t really understand everything that Roshan was talking about, nor
was I any the wiser about the Holy Spirit. The only thing that stuck were
the words „repent, be baptised and pray for the Holy Spirit‟. But I was not
sure of what it meant to repent, or why one should be baptised, or what
the point of the Holy Spirit was.
The next day I phoned Michael and asked him when he would be free
to take me to the Christian bookshop.
„I‟ll be free tomorrow morning. Do you know where the Gujarat
University playing grounds are?‟ asked Michael.
„Yes I think so. I am sure that my driver Pankaj knows where it is. If he
doesn‟t I‟ll call you back for instructions,‟ I replied. Pankaj was another
person recommended by our neighbour Nita, their driver‟s brother.
„There is a branch of the State Bank of India there, meet me there. The
bookshop is in the same building. Is 10:30 okay with you?‟
„Yes 10:30 is fine. I‟ll see you then.‟
Pankaj knew exactly where the bank was and so the next morning I
turned up at 10:30. Michael arrived on his scooter a few moments later.
291
 SECOND CHANCE

We descended down some stairs into the basement floor into the
bookstore.
„Good morning Aunty. This is my friend Arjuna, he is interested in
buying some books‟ said Michael to a dark middle aged lady sitting at a
counter at the entrance of the bookshop. She was busy doing some
additions on her calculator and entering some figures in a note book. She
looked up and smiled and said something to Michael which I couldn‟t
quite make out.
„Pastor Roshan told me to show the books on the Holy Spirit, is that
what you are most interested in ?‟ asked Michael.
„Yes and any other books that you think that might interest in me.‟
In a matter of minutes my arms were full of books as Michael pulled
out book after book; most of them were on the Holy Spirit and
autobiographies of people that I had never heard of:

‗The Fourth Dimension‘ and ‗The Holy Spirit My Senior Partner‘ by Paul Yongi
Cho
Smith Wigglesworth ‗On The Holy Spirit‘ and Smith Wigglesworth Biography
Heavenly Man the Remarkable story of Chinese Christian Brother Yun, Paul
Hattaway
Chasing the Dragon, Jackie Pullinger
Sadhu Sundar Singh, Phyllis Thompson
Evangelism by Fire, Reinhard Bonke
He Touched Me, Benny Hinn
The Cross and the Switchblade, David Wilkerson
I dared to call him Father, Bilquis Sheikh
Catch the Fire, Guy Chevreau
From Witchcraft to Christ, Doreen Irvine
It takes Love to Make a Miracle, Mahesh Chavda
Torn Veil, Gulshan Esther
The Great Awakening, Joseph Tracy
Frida:Chosen to Die, Destined to Live, Frida Gashumba
Compelled by Love, Heidi Baker

I was excited when I got home. I loved buying and reading books. As I
started reading them, my appetite for the next one increased further. Rita
got quite annoyed with me as all that I did for the next week was devour
book after book. I couldn‟t believe what I was reading. Each book told of
extraordinary and miraculous things happening to ordinary people
believing in Jesus Christ. There were people in England, America, China,
India, Pakistan, Korea, Canada, Africa whose lives were transformed;
stories of people being miraculously cured of terminal illnesses, chronic
physical disabilities, raising people from the dead; from 1740 to present
day. It seemed to be happening everywhere in isolated pockets.
292
 SOME QUESTIONS

What struck me is that many of these books were autobiographies

describing events that, theoretically, could be verified. The stories were
more miraculous then anything I had read concerning miracles performed
by Hindu mystics. The Hindu mystics seemed to specialise in
materialising objects, healing the occasional sick person, but nothing on
the scale of what I was reading about. It was a world that I was totally
unaware of.
I wondered whether it was all made up. There were a couple of things
that struck me as being strange. Firstly that all of these people ascribed
what was happening to them to the Holy Spirit, they were all at pains to
say that it was not to do with them that they were not special or
particularly spiritual. This was in stark contrast to Hindu mystics and
Gurus who seemed to delight in telling others that their enlightenment
was purely because they were superior in wisdom and discipline than
anybody else, that they were the source and originator of any miracles,
and that they had effectively become god, earning the right to be
worshiped by us lesser mortals.
In fact Brother Yun in the Heavenly Man, a truly amazing story, makes
it a very big point that it was the Lord Jesus Christ that was doing
everything and the moment that he started to do something on his own
initiative, the Lord was quick to discipline him. This particular incident
between Yun and his wife Deling, gave remarkable insight into Yun‟s
character and his relationship to God (in contrast with the character and
personality of Hindu mystics who claim to be god). Yun‟s wife is
warning him that he is about to be arrested:
‗ ―Yun, the Lord has showed me that if you do not obey his leading you will be
taken to a place you don‘t want to go. God is warning us. Let‘s leave now while
it‘s still dark, so we can flee from those want to harm us!‖
I told my wife, ―Look, the time for the wheat harvest is almost upon us. Let‘s wait
a few days, then we‘ll go.‖
I felt my logic was sound, and I tried to make Deling see my point of view, but she
told me, ―If you won‘t listen to me you will surely find trouble. You‘ve become so
stubborn in your heart and you always try to be a hero. You no longer listen to
other people‘s advice. You need to repent and pray that God will purify your
heart.‖
At that time the Holy Spirit even spoke to me from Mathew 2:13, “Get up…..
take the child and his mother and escape.” He told me to leave right
away, but I didn‘t listen to his warning.
Because I‘d been operating in my own strength for months, I was physically,
emotionally and spiritually exhausted. My spiritual eyesight had grown dim and
my hearing dull. Pride had sprung up in my heart like a chocking weed. Instead of

293
 SECOND CHANCE

obeying God‘s voice, I reasoned with human logic and based my decisions on my
own wisdom….
Ministry had become and idol. Working for God had taken the place of loving
God. I hid my condition from those who prayed for me and carried on in my own
strength, until God decided to intervene in his mercy and love….
Four days after, plain clothed PSB officers ambushed me outside my home…
Because of my disobedience and disrespect for the Lord, my wife, and my co-
workers, I went to prison for a second time. The Lord saw I was exhausted in the
ministry, so he graciously allowed me to rest in him behind bars for a while and
learn about inner spiritual life.‘
The second oddity is that all of the authors continue to stress and
highlight their own stupidity and foolishness throughout their
autobiographies. I saw this pattern time and time again. The other odd
thing was that it across time, across countries and nationalities: Brother
Yun (Chinese, 1990s) , Sadhu Sundar Singh (Punjabi, Indian, 1900s),
Smith Wigglesworth (English 1930s), Jonathan Edwards (American
1750s), David Wilkerson (American, 1960s), Paul Yongi Cho (Korean,
70-80s), Gulshan Esther (Muslim, 80s), Mahesh Chavda
(Hindu/Kenyan/American, 70‟s), Jackie Pullinger (Hong Kong, 60-70‟s),
Heidi Baker (Mozambique). Even stranger was the diversity of their
backgrounds some were born into practising Christian families (David
Wilkerson), some were not (Sadhu Sundar Singh), some were poor
(Yongi Cho) and others were rich (Gulshan Esther), some were highly
educated (Jonathan Edwards) and others were barely literate (Smith
Wigglesworth).
I was struck by the diversity of all these people. I realised how
completely different it was to the backgrounds of Indian mystics who are
predominately from India, born in Brahmin families and tend to be highly
educated. The other common factor of Hindu mystics is that all of them
spent years and years under the tutelage of some other Guru who imparts
some special secret knowledge. The implication is that there seems to be
some advantage, perhaps even a necessity, to be born into a Hindu
Brahmin educated family and be under the discipleship of a guru. The
other big difference was that I could not recall of any „stupid‟ incidents
described in the autobiographies of Yogendra (The Autobiography of a
Yogi), or Sai Baba, Swami Muktenanda, Swami Vivekananda, Sri
Aurobindo. As I was reading their books I got the sense that I was being
taught by some great wise, always perfect, sage who by their own
painstaking disciplined study and intelligence had found the truth, a truth
which would be difficult to attain without going through some similar
process.
In contrast the people that I was reading about now, seemed to have
been „zapped‟ and radically transformed by the Holy Spirit. As I was
294
 SOME QUESTIONS

reading the books I mused that Rupert would probably have put it all
down to some psychotic delusional episode. I also thought that it could
be, but there was nothing in common in their backgrounds which could
possible explain why their experiences seemed to be so similar. I couldn‟t
understand how it could be true.
Perhaps I was missing something. It really got me thinking. I would be
more convinced if I saw this happening in front of me. If it was across
nations and across time then how come I had not heard or seen it before?
There didn‟t seem to be any special magic, just a belief in Jesus Christ and
that he could really do anything and everything, no special mantra or
meditational purification process. The words that had stuck the previous
week, „Repent, be baptised in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and pray
to receive the Holy Spirit.‟, were echoed in all the biographies. I
wondered if Roshan Christian had repented, and been baptised and had
prayed to receive the Holy Spirit, and that if he had then what had he
experienced. I wondered whether this was a real universal experience, or
some kind of self induced hypnotic effect that was planted by talking to
others or reading about it, the way that I had read about it.
I wanted to talk to Roshan about it.
It wasn‟t until 11:30 at night that I managed to get hold of him.
„Hello Roshan, where have you been? I‟ve been trying to get hold of
you,‟ I asked.
„I went to Godhra. I have a church there. Is something the matter?‟
Roshan asked.
„No, everything is fine. Look I‟d like to meet up with you. Michael took
me to that Christian book store and I‟ve finished reading all the books
and I have a lot of questions.‟
„My, my! Brother you are a very quick reader. Michael told me that you
had enough books to last you many months. Praise the Lord. I can see
you tomorrow in the morning. Why don‟t you come over to my place?‟
„Okay. Is 10:30 fine with you?‟ I asked.
„Yes that is okay. I‟ll see you tomorrow,‟ with that Roshan put the
phone down.
Rita was in the kitchen. I shouted out whether she had heard of
Godhra. She came out and warned me again of not shouting at her, but
to come and talk to her and not shout. She hadn‟t heard my question,
which I repeated. Rita stood there, wiping a plate.
„Isn‟t that the place where the train got burnt down, and triggered off
all the riots between Hindus and Muslims?‟ she replied.
„Yes I think you are right. Roshan has a church there. I‟m going to see
him tomorrow in the morning, do you want to come?‟
„I don‟t have time to waste sitting around and chatting. You go but
don‟t get into a long conversation.‟

295
SECOND CHANCE

296
 20 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

I was at Roshan‟s at 10:30 the next morning. I had been standing

outside for a while waiting. No one seemed to be in. Maybe I had made a
mistake with the time. Then I heard Roshan‟s voice calling from inside.
„I‟m sorry brother. Are you alone or is Rita with you ?‟ he hollered from
inside.
„I‟m alone.‟
„One minute. I‟ll be with you soon.‟
I wondered what he was up to. Moments later he opened the door. His
hair was wet and he was draped in a towel around his waist.
„My, my brother! There was trouble with the water this morning. I got a
little late. Please excuse me I was in the shower when you knocked.
Please sit down. I will get changed and then we can have a cup of tea and
talk,‟ apologised Roshan.
„You go right ahead. Don‟t mind me, I‟ll make myself comfortable,‟ I
replied.
Roshan disappeared into his bedroom. I made myself comfortable,
sitting down on his bed which also served as a sofa during the day. It was
a small single bed, very simple, three feet wide, six foot long. There was a
faded blue cotton sheet covering a thin mattress resting on a wooden
plank, there were no springs; quite Spartan. The bed was pushed up
against the outside wall. His apartment was on the first floor. A window
overlooked the bed; the bright sunshine was streaming into the room.
The rest of the room consisted of a book case that was to the right of the
window as you looked at the window. A desk that was to the left of the
window, at the head of the bed, there were more shelves with more
books on top of the desk. There was a telephone and several pictures of
the family on the desk, which was kept fairly neat and tidy. There were
copies of bibles, various books on praying, worship, all about Christianity
297
 SECOND CHANCE

lying in small neatly stacked piles everywhere. Opposite the bed were
several folding chairs and a small coffee table. In the corner was a TV
which had a DVD and VCD player sitting on top of it. The walls were
covered with a bluish white paint which was peeling and flaking off in a
number of places. I later found out that most houses had their walls
whitewashed every three to four years. Some „painter‟ would come
around with chalk, crush it up, mix it with water and put it on the wall. If
you brushed your hand against the wall a bit of the chalk would rub off.
It was a lot cheaper that using proper paint which was seen as a decadent
luxury – only for the very rich!
There were two other bedrooms, one was Roshan‟s the other one was
the children‟s; a small toilet, and a shower, and a kitchen. The whole
apartment was no more than five hundred square feet, about twenty feet
by twenty five feet. This was a typical middle class home. Roshan and
Roshni had just brought a fridge. Most houses did without one, there was
no need, you got fresh food every day.
„Where‟s Roshni ?‟ I asked.
„She‟s out. Shopping or something,‟ called back Roshan who was still in
his room getting ready.
I was browsing through Roshan‟s collection of books when he
returned.
„I am really sorry brother, for keeping you waiting. Would you like a cup
of tea ?‟ asked Roshan.
„Only if you are having one.‟
„Of course,‟ Roshan got up and popped into the kitchen.
„Oh, oh, my, my! I‟m sorry we are out of milk. I‟ll go down and get
some from the shops,‟ said Roshan returning from the kitchen.
I looked at my watch it was already 11:10. I had promised Rita that I
would be back at 11:30 and we hadn‟t even started talking.
„No it‟s quite alright. I have to get back home. Perhaps some other
time.‟
„It‟s no problem. I‟ll be right back,‟ Roshan was heading for the front
door to get the milk.
I stood up and said, „Really Roshan there is no need. I have to leave in
ten minutes, I promised that I would be back home by 11:30. Some other
time.‟
Roshan looked at me and could see that I was in a hurry.
„Okay,‟ he sat down on one of the folding chairs. „What do you want to
talk about?‟
„I went with Michael to that bookshop and got those books on the Holy
Spirit. I read them and was quite surprised by what I read. Do you have
this Holy Spirit ?‟ I asked.
Roshan smiled.

298
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

„Yes I do have the Holy Spirit, my Lord has blessed me, and many of
our church people also have the Holy Spirit.‟
„So can you do all these healings and miracles, just like all these people
that I was reading about in these books ?‟
„I do not do the healings but it is the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit never
changes, it is the same today as it was yesterday and it will be the same
tomorrow.‟
„What kind of healings?‟ I asked.
„I have seen many wonderful things. There have been mad people who
have been cured. Once I prayed for a woman who was blind and she
regained her eyesight. It was in the newspapers.‟
„Do you have that newspaper article ?‟ I asked.
„It was a long time ago, over ten years. I kept it for a while and then I
threw it away.‟
I was getting suspicious. I know that I wouldn‟t have thrown away an
article that was about me healing someone that had been blind.
„Why did you throw it away ?‟ I asked.
„Because God is always doing things like that and the paper was lying
around for a long while and it kept getting in the way. Roshni was getting
fed up seeing it day after day, so one day she just threw it,‟ Roshan
chuckled.
Rita was the same, she was always trying get rid of my things. They
seemed to be junk to her, whereas her things were treasured essentials.
„Look I find these things in all the books really difficult to believe. I
would believe it, if I could see it. You say that you have the Holy Spirit,
so you can still do this healing?‟ I asked.
„It is not me that does it, but the Holy Spirit. And yes, the Holy Spirit
can still heal. I understand that it is difficult to believe if you have not
seen it. I see the Holy Spirit working around me all the time, in lots of
different ways. In the beginning even I did not believe in the Holy Spirit.
The elders in the Church that I used to go to, used to tell me that the
Holy Spirit is inside all Christians, they receive it as soon as they are
baptised. Then I used to ask, then why don‟t we see the signs and
wonders that are described in the New Testament, in the book of Acts
and in the epistles of Paul and the other apostles. They told me that the
Holy Spirit worked like that in the early days of the church to establish it.
Now it was not necessary for all the Spirit to work in this way as the
church was established and we had the full record of these events.
For a long time I believed what they said. Because I never saw any of
these miracles. No one in the church including the Pastors and Bishops,
none of them had the power to heal, cast out demons or do the other
miracles. So I thought that they were right. But one day I was reading the
bible and I read that God is the same today, as he was yesterday and will
be the same tomorrow. The God of yesterday, at the time of Jesus and
299
 SECOND CHANCE

the time of Moses was constantly doing miracles and wonders, healing
the blind and raising the dead. So if the bible is correct then the God of
yesterday is the same as the God of today, so these healing and miracles
should be happening today as well. Let me show you the passage in the
bible.‟
Roshan stood up and picked up a Bible from the shelf on top of his
desk and thumbed to the relevant passage. „Here it is Hebrews 13 verse
18, see for yourself,‟ Roshan gave me the Bible pointing to the passage,
which said:
‗Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.‘
Roshan took the bible back after I had finished reading the passage. He
continued with his story: „I was very confused, either the bible was wrong
or the elders and everyone in the church was wrong. I knew that the bible
could not be wrong. I prayed to God and asked him, why he had written
this down in the bible and why I did not see any miracles any more, and
why the elders in the church were telling me what they were telling me.
Then God revealed to me that they had not yet received the Holy Spirit,
and that is why they did not have the gifts or the fruits of the Spirit and
were unable to do any of the miracles and healings.
I read my bible again and in the Book of John chapter 14 versus 15 to
18, Jesus promises to send his Holy Spirit to all the believers. Here let me
show you,‟ Roshan opened up his bible and showed me the passages. I
read the verses as I had done before:
‗If you love me, you will obey what I command. And I will ask the Father, and he
will give you another Counsellor to be with you forever- the Spirit of Truth. The
world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know
him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will
come to you.‘
„Heh, that passage was in the book that you gave me!‟ I interrupted.
Roshan smiled and took back the bible, and continued, „I then prayed
to God, that I am not going to move from this place until I receive your
Holy Spirit. You have promised this gift to all believers who ask for this
gift. I am a believer and I want to receive this gift. I started praying this at
seven in the evening. I prayed all night. Just as the sun was rising, I was
filled with God‟s Holy Spirit. I was so happy, I just sang and praised
God.‟
I remained silent for a while, digesting what Roshan had just told me,
wondering what to say.
„How did you know that you had received the Holy Spirit?‟ I asked.
„The feeling was indescribable. I knew that something had happened to
me. It was like being filled with love. I was overwhelmed. I couldn‟t
stand. I was flooded by wave, after wave of love. Then I just wanted to
300
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

say thank you to God, I wanted to shout out how happy I was at the top
of my voice. I started to speak, but what I spoke was not Hindi, or
Gujarati or English it was an unknown tongue. You may have heard
some people speaking in some strange language in the Church.‟
„Yes I did hear some odd language.‟
„Even that is written in the bible. Here read for yourself Acts chapter 2,
verse 4,‟ Roshan handed me his bible for the third time. I read:
‗All of them were filled with Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as
the Spirit enabled them.‘
Roshan continued, „I couldn‟t sleep for the next couple of days. I kept
on speaking in this unknown language. Then I started reading about all
these gifts of the Spirit, and the Lord revealed to me how to receive these
various gifts and use them to build his kingdom. Here let me show you it
is in 1 Corinthians chapter 11, verses 7 to 11.‟ Once again Roshan
searched for the relevant passage and then handed me his Bible. I read:
‗Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To
one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message
of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to
another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another
prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different
kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the
work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he
determines.‘
Roshan continued, „I prayed to God to receive these gifts, just as it is
written in the Bible in Luke chapter 11, verses 9 to 12, and I received
these gifts.‟ Again he handed me the bible and once again I read the
verses:
‗So I say to you: ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and
the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds;
and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you fathers, if your son
asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give
him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to
your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to
those who ask him!‘
I handed the bible back to Roshan and sat back on the bed with my
back to the wall.
„So you just prayed and you got all these gifts. That‟s all you did?‟ It was
all sounding a bit too easy.
„Yes all I had to do was pray. But first I had to repent and be baptised,
remember, I told you that the other day,‟ Roshan thumbed through the
bible, „here in the book of Acts chapter 2 verse 38 and 39.
301
 SECOND CHANCE

I read:
‗Peter replied, ―Repent and baptized, every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ
for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The
promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off – for all whom the
Lord our God will call.‖‟
Here was another quotation that was in the book that Roshan had
given me when we had first gone to his church.
„But this is Peter saying this. Show me where it says that Jesus said to do
these things, like the previous passages,‟ I asked.
„My, my brother. You are very quick. Here in Mathew chapter 4 verse
17 and John chapter 3 verses 5 to 7,‟ Roshan showed me the passages
which I read. First Mathew:
‗From that time on Jesus began to preach, ―Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is
near.‖‘
Then I read the passage in John.
„Jesus answered, ―I tell you the truth, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless
he is born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives
birth to spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying. ‗You must be born
again.‘‖‘
„I know you told me in McDonald‟s but what is this repenting thing?‟
„Repent means to turn to God, you have to admit that you are lost
without God, and that you realise and are willing to surrender your will to
his will,‟ replied Roshan.
Roshan had surprised me by supporting what he was saying by directly
quoting the Bible. Anand and others had always given me their
interpretations and logic and had never referred to a book. It was easier
to validate whether what Roshan was saying was actually in the Bible. But
we had gone off the point. I wanted to know whether this Holy Spirit
thing was really real. I wanted to personally experience it, or at least see it
in operation for myself. I wanted to compare the spiritual power of the
Holy Spirit to the spiritual experience of Reiki and Transcendental
Meditation.
I said to Roshan, „Okay. I want to see the Holy Spirit working. If it is as
powerful as you and the people, who I have been reading about, say it is,
then it should be easy to detect, but I have never seen it. Nor have I ever
heard anyone, not a single person talk about in England in my thirty plus
years of existence. It just seems bizarre that something this powerful and
wonderful could have been kept hidden. Besides you said that this Spirit
is working in the same way as it was in the time of the Bible. I want to see
it!‟ I was surprised at how pushy I was on this matter.

302
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

„I understand. You are like Thomas in the Bible he wanted to see Jesus
and touch him himself before he would believe that he had risen from
the dead. Here let me show you.‟ Roshan was about to show me the
reference in the bible.
„It‟s okay. I believe you. But I still would like to see the Holy Spirit in
action.‟
„The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of God it is sovereign and does what it
wants to do. It does not obey nor is it subservient to any man. So I
cannot guarantee that you will see it in operation. If God desires to reveal
it to you he will. However, next week I am going on a mission‟s trip for
three days to Banswada, the villages in Gujarat and Rajasthan. Why don‟t
you come with me and meet with some of the people there? You will see
what the Holy Spirit has done. If God desires he may even perform a
miracle in front of you.‟
I was wondering whether or not to take Roshan up on the offer when I
glanced at my watch. It was coming up to 12 noon.
„Look. I‟ve got to go. I‟ll call you and let you know if I can make it to
this trip. When is it ?‟
„I‟ll be leaving on Tuesday morning we‟ll be back on Saturday. I‟ve
arranged a jeep. Call me this evening and let me know so that I can make
the necessary arrangements.‟
„Let me discuss it with Rita and then I‟ll call you. Most probably, I‟ll be
coming. I‟ve got to go. Bye.‟
I flew out of the house and rushed back to Rita. She was annoyed that I
was over an hour late getting back home. It wasn‟t until the late
afternoon that she had cooled down sufficiently for me to bring up the
subject of going for three days with Roshan into the heartland of Gujarat
and Rajasthan.
„I think you are spending too much time with Roshan. Why do you
have to go?‟ she asked.
„I want to see this Holy Spirit that I keep on reading about working in
practice. I really want to see what is happening in the villages. You know
how the newspapers report it as Christians bribing poor villagers to
convert. I want to see whether that is true. Besides one of the reasons for
coming to India was to see ways in which I could help the poor. This is a
great opportunity.‟
„I think that you are wasting your time. You can go, if you want, but I
want you to be careful. I don‟t want you getting ill out there by catching
something.‟
I called Roshan to let him know that I was coming. We were going to
leave Ahmedabad the following Tuesday. Roshan was going to hire a
Mahindra Jeep, there would be no air conditioning; temperatures would
be in the high 30s.

303
 SECOND CHANCE

Tuesday soon came by. Roshan had told me to be at his place by 7:30 in
the morning, to leave promptly at 7:45. I got there just a little before 7:30.
Roshan was a little startled when he opened the door.
„My, my brother. What time is it ?‟ he asked.
„7:30, the time that you told me to be here.‟ I replied.
„My, my. I got a phone call from the Pastor in Anand and that went for
a long time. I will get ready quickly. Please sit down. I‟ll get Roshni to
make you a cup of tea,‟ Roshan shouted to Roshni to make a cup of tea
and then he darted into the shower.
A few moments later, Michael arrived. He was going to be coming with
us on the trip.
„Who else is coming on the trip?‟ I asked Michael.
„There is the Pastor, me, the driver, you, brother Samuel from Godhra
and then we will meet with Brothers Pravin and Kishore at Jalod,‟ replied
Michael.
Michael and I chatted as we waited for Roshan to get ready. By the time
we left it was a little after 9. In London I would have been jumping up
and down at not keeping to time, but this was Ahmedabad, India.
Nothing seemed to happen on time. The jeep was waiting for us. The
driver was a very thin young man, who introduced himself as Vijay.
„You said that there are seven of us going?‟ I asked Michael, wondering
how we would all manage to get into the vehicle.
„Yes three of us will sit in the front, and four of us in the back,‟ he
replied.
I looked at him a little surprised.
„Don‟t worry brother Arjuna, you will be quite comfortable. Kishore
and Pravin are very thin. Wait until you see the full capacity of a jeep,
then you will realise that we are travelling in real luxury,‟ Michael smiled
and sat in the front next to the driver.
I wondered what he meant. Roshan and I sat at the back.
„Let us pray, before we leave,‟ said Roshan, and then prayed in the Jeep:
„Oh Lord Father, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. We thank you
Lord for your tender love and mercies. We thank you for everything that
you are doing in our lives. We ask and pray in the mighty name of our
Lord Jesus Christ that you be with us and protect us on our journey.
Cover Vijay and this jeep with the blood of Jesus and send your angels to
protect us from the evil one. We thank you for answering this prayer and
looking after us. We make this prayer in the precious name of our saviour
Jesus Christ. Amen.‟
Michael said Amen, and in a reflex action I said Amen also, not
understanding why Roshan was asking for Vijay and the jeep to be
covered with the blood of Jesus.

304
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

„Well, brother Arjuna, you are really going to enjoy this trip. Did you
bring your camera? You will see many strange things!‟ said Roshan,
smiling.
„Yes I have my camera with me. How long before we get to Godhra?‟
„Now we will be caught up in traffic, it will take us a little over two
hours. We will have some tea and snacks there at brother Samuel‟s place.
From there we will go to Jalod which will take us another two hours,
there we will meet Brothers Pravin and Kishore and then we will go to
Banswada which will be another hour or so. We are going to have a really
enjoyable time,‟ replied Roshan.
I sat back, looking at the traffic. Offices and shops started openning
between 9:30 and 10:30, quite late considering that sunrise was at 6 in the
morning. That was Ahmedabad a relaxed and laid back place to live,
relax, eat, socialise, shop and work (in that order of priority). Progress
was slow, especially at traffic lights.
Typically, we would be waiting at a red traffic light waiting for the light
to go green, a clear road ahead of us. However, the situation would not
last for long. First several bicycle riders would squeeze around on either
side to get in front of us. Then several mopeds and motorbikes would do
the same. After they get to the front the motorbike riders would switch
of their engines to save petrol. In less than a minute we would
surrounded by bikes, mopeds and motorbikes like a blocking shield. The
traffic light would go yellow, and the motorbike and moped riders would
attempt to kick start their bikes (very few had automatic ignition)
invariably one, occasionally two, would have been unable to re-start their
engines before the light turned from yellow to green. So we would be
stuck behind these non-starting bikes and/or cyclists slowly moving off:
highly frustrating.
Forty minutes later we made it to the outskirts of Ahmedabad, heading
towards Mehmedabad and then onto Godhra. It was a main road, but
only wide enough for two cars, no central dividing line. Trees and fields
lined either side of the road. There was no barrier separating the road
from the trees and there were usually people walking alongside of the
road. A highly dangerous prospect as there was no pavement. There
would be the occasional bullock cart, or camel cart slowly inching along
the road but they usually kept to the side of the road and were not so
much of a threat. The greatest menace was the ST (State Transport)
buses. The drivers were reckless in their overtaking manoeuvres,
overtaking a bullock cart or a camel, sometimes around a blind bend or a
blind hill, or sometimes just hopelessly misjudging their ability to
overtake in time. There were many times when Vijay had to slam on the
brakes, to avoid a bus that was over on the wrong side of the road
heading straight for us. I was glad that we were travelling during the day.

305
 SECOND CHANCE

We were an hour into the journey. I was wondering how to take my

mind of the perilous road trip to Banswada. I hoped that Roshan‟s God
had listened to his prayer and was keeping us safe. It was thinking about
the prayer which led me to ask Roshan a question.
„Roshan, can I ask you something about the prayer that you said before
we left this morning?‟
„Yes, sure brother. What is it?‟
„In your prayer you said something about covering Vijay and this jeep
with the blood of Jesus. Did I hear you correctly?‟
„My, my brother. I prayed that Vijay and the jeep would be covered with
the blood of Jesus to protect us from the evil one,‟ replied Roshan.
I frowned back at Roshan. Roshan smiled back and laughed.
„Let me explain. In the book of Ephesians chapter 6 verses 10 to 13, let
me read them to you,‟ Roshan pulled out a bible from his bag and began
to read:
‗Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armour of
God so that you can take your stand against the devil‘s schemes. For our struggle
is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities,
against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the
heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of
evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done
everything, to stand.‘
„What does that mean?‟ I asked.
„This passage is telling us that the problems and difficulties that we have
in this world are really the result of what is happening in the spiritual
world. You remember in that book it says that we are either on God‟s
plan or we‟re not. If we are not on God‟s plan then we are subject to the
whims of the god of this world, and not the God of Heaven.‟
„Hold on, isn‟t the god of this world also the God of Heaven ?‟ I asked.
„My brother that is a common error. Let me read to you Ephesians
chapter two, the first two verses:
―As for you, you are dead in your transgressions and sins, in which he used to live
when you follow the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air,
the spirit who is now at work in those were disobedient.‖
Did you notice brother Arjuna that the ways of this world are subject to
the ruler of the kingdom of the air?”
„Yes, I did. But who is that? It can‟t be Jesus because it says that this
ruler of the kingdom of the air works in those that are disobedient.‟
„You are very sharp. Let us read what Jesus has to see in John 14, verse
28. Jesus is talking to his disciples after that famous last supper, just
before he is arrested:

306
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

―You heard me say, I am going away and I am coming back to you. If you loved
me, you‘d be glad that I‘m going to the Father, for the Father is greater than I. I
have told you now before it happens, so that when it does happen, you will believe
will. I will not speak with you much longer, but the prince of this world is coming.
He has no hold on me.‖‘
‗Are you telling me that Satan is the prince of the air, and that he is the
one that is the god of this world ?‟, I asked.
„That is what the bible says,‟ replied Roshan.
„But why would God put Satan in charge of the world ?‟ This seemed a
very strange thing for God to do, to put all of mankind under Satan‟s
dominion.
„To answer that question we have to go back in time and look at the
sequence of events that happened before God created Adam and Eve.
When God created this universe he also created the angels to help him
with the administration and running of the universe. You have a business
background so I will explain it to you in business terms. God was the
founder and the Chairman of the universe. He also created a super angel,
whose name was Lucifer who he put in charge of the angels, like a
Managing Director, looking after the operations. Let me read to you what
it says about Lucifer in the book of Ezekiel 28 verses 12 to 18:
―You were the model of perfection full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. You were
in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone adorned you: ruby, topaz and
emerald, chrysolite, onyx and jasper, sapphire, turquoise and beryl. Your settings
and mountings were made of gold; on the day you were created they were prepared.
You were anointed as a guardian cherub, for so I ordained you. You were on the
holy mount of God; you walked among the fiery stones. You were blameless in your
ways from the day you were created till wickedness was found in you. Through your
widespread trade you were filled with violence, and you sinned. So I drove you in
disgrace from the mount of God, and I expelled you, O guardian cherub, from
among the fiery stones. Your heart became proud on account of your beauty and
you corrupted your wisdom because of your splendour. So I threw you to the earth;
I made a spectacle of you before kings. By your sins and dishonest trade you have
desecrated your sanctuaries. So I made a fire come out from you, and it consumed
you, and I reduced you to ashes on the ground in the sight of all who were
watching.‘
„Isn‟t he referring to Adam, it was Adam who was in Eden ?‟ I asked.
„Yes Adam was in Eden, but this is a guardian cherub, so it is an angel
who was also in Eden. We know that there was a speaking serpent which
was also in Eden which deceived Adam and Eve. You see after creating
the angels he created the universe and then he created man, Adam. God
loved Adam and put him in charge of the Earth and everything that was
in it. Lucifer got really jealous and angry when he saw that God had put
Adam in charge, relegating Lucifer to a lower status than Adam. So
307
 SECOND CHANCE

Lucifer got some of the angels together and decided to rebel. In the
business world I think you call this kind of activity a management
takeover. The managers, Lucifer and some of the angels, felt that they
could do a much better job than this new replacement CEO, Adam.
They felt that the founder and Chairman, God, had made a terrible
mistake. So we read in Revelations chapter 12 verses 7 to 9:
―And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon,
and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they
lost their place in heaven. The great dragon was hurled down – that ancient serpent
called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the
earth, and his angels with him.‖
„This is talking about a serpent who is the devil and Satan. But where
does this Lucifer name fit into all of this?‟ I asked.
„That is a good question, we have to go to the book of Isaiah chapter 14
verses 12 to 15. Let me read it to you:
―How you have fallen from heaven, O Lucifer (the morning star), son of the dawn!
You have been cast down to the earth, you who once laid low the nations! You said
in your heart, ‗I will ascend to heaven; I will raise my throne above the stars of
God; I will sit enthroned on the mount of assembly, on the utmost heights of the
sacred mountain. I will ascend above the tops of the clouds; I will make myself like
the Most High.‘ But you are brought down to the grave, to the depths of the pit.‖
„Okay so Satan, Lucifer, whatever his name is was hurled down to earth.
But why put him in charge ?‟ Roshan still had not addressed my question.
„I am coming to that. Remember, Satan‟s punishment for not following
God‟s plan was to lose his position in heaven ?‟
„Yes, I remember. But what is the relevance of that?‟ I asked.
„Well when Adam and Eve rebelled in the same way that Satan rebelled,
then they too became subject to similar consequences. God is highly
principled and righteous, everyone is subject to the same rules and
consequences for disobedience. That is why Adam and Eve, and their
descendents had their authority removed. God had originally put Adam
and all mankind in charge of everything on earth. God had ordained that
this heaven and earth would last for seven thousand years. God‟s desire
and plan was for Adam and Eve to reign for all seven thousand years. But
their disobedience in rejecting God‟s plan, unfortunately has put Satan
back in charge for six thousand years. The six thousand years started
from Adam‟s banishment from Eden. The last thousand years will be
under Jesus‟ reign.‟
„So it is Adam and Eve‟s fault that Satan is in charge ?‟
„Yes. But now we can chose to be like Adam and be a slave to Satan or
we can chose to be a slave to Jesus Christ. That is a choice that everyone
is free to make.‟
308
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

There was no hesitation in Roshan‟s responses to my questions,

perhaps he had been asked these questions before. I was impressed how
he went from one seemingly unconnected passage to another in the bible
and made the connection.
„How come you remember where all these passages are; and are so
quick to reply?‟ I asked.
„It is only with the help of the Holy Spirit. It is the Holy Spirit that
wrote the entire bible working through prophets like Ezekiel and Isaiah
and apostles like John and Paul. That same Spirit is inside of me that's
why I know where all the passages are and how they are related to one
another. Isaiah was a prophet in 700BC and Ezekiel in 570BC, and the
apostle John wrote the book of Revelations in 100AD. A span of 800
years, different human authors but only one Spiritual author, the Holy
Spirit. That is why you can read the different passages as if it was one
continuous coherent narrative,‟ replied Roshan.
This was all very interesting, but we had drifted again from the question
that I had asked. There was never a straightforward reply to anything that
I asked Roshan.
„But what does this have to do with the prayer and the blood of Jesus?‟
I asked.
„I am getting to do that. But to understand the prayer I have to explain
why it is necessary. Can I continue?‟ Roshan asked.
I nodded in agreement, but it was getting difficult to remember this
train of thought.
„So Satan, Lucifer, rebelled. He was now mad at God and mad at Adam.
So he tricked Adam and Eve into also rebelling against God. God had
explicitly told Adam to not eat from the fruit of the knowledge of good
and evil, yet he defied God and did the only thing that he was not allowed
to do. God is just and fair, and punished Adam accordingly to what he
had done. Remember God warned Adam not to do this, telling him that
Adam would surely die. See God will not punish you, without first
warning you and making you aware that you are doing something wrong.
This is what some would say is your inner conscience. It is God warning
you. God removed the authority from Adam and mankind and
temporarily gave it back to Satan. Satan, or Lucifer, they are the same was
in charge of the whole universe is now in charge of this world. Let me
read to you where it tells us that this is the case, it is in a number of
places firstly Ephesians 2 verses 1 and 2,
―As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to
live when you followed the ways of this world and of the prince of the kingdom of
the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient.
‖ So the spirit that is directly controlling mankind is Satan.”

309
 SECOND CHANCE

A cold shiver went up my spine. I remembered Adolf Hitler‟s

horoscope and had wondered what kind of spiritual power would be so
deranged as to guard Hitler‟s life leading to the death of over 70 million
people. Roshan was suggesting that according to the bible that the
spiritual entity, a fallen angel, Lucifer a.k.a. Satan was this malevolent
spirit intervening in our lives. Could this really be true?
Roshan continued, „you see Arjuna, currently Satan, is the prince of this
world. The world is under Satan‟s control because Adam, like us, rejected
God and so ended up rejecting this world which God had created solely
for Adam and us. That is why when Satan is tempting Jesus in the desert.
Satan offers Jesus all the kingdoms of the world, here in Mathew chapter
4 verses 8 and 9
‗Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the
kingdoms of the world and their splendour. ―All this I will give you,‖ he said, ―if
you will bow down and worship me.‖‘
Satan was offering Jesus the kingdoms of the world which he currently
has control over.‟
„So you are telling me that it is the devil, Satan, that is in control of this
world and not God? And that God is allowing Satan to run riot, why
would God allow that?‟
„Yes Satan is in control by the authority that God has given him. So
Satan is controlling what happens. All this evil is the result of Satan being
in control and bringing out the evil in each and every one of us. That is
why I said earlier that our struggle is not against flesh and blood but
against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Your question
about why God allows Satan to run riot, is not correctly framed.‟
„What do you mean, not correctly framed?”
„God does not want Satan to be in control, but God is a righteous God
who abides by the rules that he has set. It is Adam that chose to defy
God, it is Adam that put Satan in charge. It is Adam‟s descendents, you
and me, who allow Satan to remain in charge, so long as we continue to
be in rebellion towards God.‟
I was getting quite irritated with his explanations. Now he was saying
that it was my fault that Satan and evil were in this world.
„Okay. So what about the blood of Jesus?‟ I asked.
„This is a quotation from John 12:31,
―Now is the time for judgement on this world; now the prince of this world will be
driven out‖.
Jesus was referring to his imminent crucifixion and resurrection, and
that this very act would drive Satan out of power and provide a means for
man to gain back to his rightful position.‟

310
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

„But I don‟t see how his death would do that. Surely the fact that Jesus
died means that it was Satan that won and it was Jesus that had been
outwitted and lost,‟ I replied.
„That is what most people think. But you see Jesus was a willing
sacrifice. At your wedding the Brahmin would have done some puja and
would have burnt some ghee and grain in a fire as an offering to god, is
that right?‟ Roshan asked.
„Yes he did that. Well the Brahmin was offering a sacrifice to please the
gods, is that right?‟
„Yes that is why he did it,‟ I wasn‟t sure where Roshan was going with
this line of questioning.
„Well even in the old testament, when the Jews did something wrong
they would have to kill a lamb or bull or something. The reason is that
the punishment for doing something wrong was death. God in his mercy
realised that we are extremely naughty and cannot help ourselves from
doing wrong things. So instead of the person dying for doing the wrong
he allowed an animal to be killed as a substitute sacrifice.‟
„This is very cruel for the innocent animals,‟ I said.
„Yes it is cruel. But the alternative to an animal being killed is for the
man, woman who ever it was that did the wrong for them to be killed.
Isn‟t killing an animal more humane than killing a person? If you get
angry at someone or even look at a girl lustfully that is evil in God‟s eyes.‟
I thought about how angry I got and how difficult it was to control my
thoughts when I saw a pretty girl.
„That‟s ridiculous. Everyone gets angry and all men have urges. It‟s
natural. It‟s completely unreasonable for God to order our death for
something as trivial as that. I thought that your God, Jesus, was loving
and compassionate! ‟
„He is. You may think it is too hard a standard but that is the standard
that has been set.‟
„I‟ve never heard this before from any other Christian. Show me where
this is written.‟
I was getting really annoyed with Roshan. He was trying to tell me that
he was better than me that he never got angry or had any lustful
thoughts. That was crap, he was a hypocrite.
„Most people, including Christians do not realise that God has set a very
high standard. Jesus explained this as part of his sermon on the Mount, in
Mathew chapter 5, let me read it to you, verses 21 and 22:
―You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‗Do not murder, and
anyone who murders will be subject to judgement. But I tell you that anyone who is
angry with his brother will be subject to judgement.‖
Then in verses 27 and 28:

311
 SECOND CHANCE

―You have heard that it was said, ‗Do not commit adultery.‘ But I tell you that
anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in
his heart.‖
I have to admit to you brother Arjuna, that I am not up to this
standard, I still get angry from time to time. In God‟s eyes I deserve
death in the burning lake of fire,‟ replied Roshan.
I had misjudged Roshan. At least he was not pretending that he could
keep to this standard.
„Okay so what is the point of having a standard that no one can keep?
That just sounds petty on the part of God, he sets a standard which no
one can keep so that he can wipe us all out. That is just totally absurd,‟
this explanation from Roshan was getting more and more ridiculous.
„Actually we all have the capacity to keep to this standard. Jesus kept to
this standard. He only got angry at those people that dishonoured God,
people who were supposed to know better like the priests and people in
the temple. Now I can get to the point and answer your question. There
were two reasons why God came down to earth in the form of man.‟
„And what were these two reasons?‟ I was getting impatient with
Roshan, it all seemed so complicated.
„The first, was to show us how we were meant to behave. Jesus is the
standard by which we are meant to think, behave and live. The second is
that Jesus came to die for us, as a willing sacrifice. He offered himself up
to die instead of me and you. You see I know that by my actions I have
fallen short of God‟s standard, and that death in the lake of fire awaits
me. God knew that I would not be able to meet the standard. So he sent
Jesus to die instead of me. The only way that I can ever get to God is to
realise that I am way below God‟s standard, to humble myself before
God and ask for his mercy, believing that Jesus is the true and living God
who came down to earth to die for me. This is what is meant by
repenting.
God had to come in flesh, so that he could shed his blood. It is his
blood that is a spiritual cleansing agent. It cleans me of all my
wrongdoings and sin. His blood also acts a spiritual protection against
anything evil happening. So when I prayed to be covered by the blood of
Jesus I was asking to be spiritually protected from Satan who is at large in
this world, wanting to do wicked things against mankind.‟
I sat back, trying to absorb what Roshan had told me. There was a lot
to take in. There was some logic to what he had said. But it was difficult
to believe, it was such a convoluted explanation. Yoga and re-incarnation
was a lot simpler to understand.
„This is all a bit difficult to believe. Show me where this is all written,‟ I
asked after a while.

312
 THE BLOOD OF JESUS

„It does take time to understand, and it is difficult. This is not man‟s
idea. It is the plan of God. No man could have thought of this it is just
outside of our imagination. The fact that it is so odd and so fantastic
should be proof that this is all God‟s making and not man‟s making. I will
read out some passages that support what I have just told you. In
Mathew chapter 26, verse 28 says „This is my blood of the covenant
which is poured out for the forgiveness of sins.‟ Then in the book of
Romans chapter 3 verses 22 to 26, the apostle Paul writes:
‗This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who
believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
and are justified freely by his grace though the redemption that came by Christ
Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.
He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the
sins committed beforehand unpunished – he did it to demonstrate his justice at the
present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in
Jesus.‘
So all you have to do to be forgiven and be with God is to repent and
have faith in Jesus,‟ concluded Roshan.
„Is that really all that I have to do? That sounds too easy,‟ I replied.
„That is all that you have to do. But it is not easy to admit that you do
not meet God‟s standard, and admit that you are a sinner. Nor is it easy
to have true faith in Jesus,‟ Roshan replied.
I had to think about what he said. It was true that I really didn‟t believe
this convoluted story that he was telling me. I was pretty sure that there
was somebody called Jesus and that he was a good man, but was he God?
I was not sure. Nor was I sure that what Roshan was reading from his
bible was true. Was it really written by the Holy Spirit as he was making
out or by some man? Then there were all those dates that he was giving
me, they had a feel of spurious accuracy.
But then again, perhaps Roshan was right. It was a lot more difficult to
repent and have faith. I would find it difficult to completely surrender
myself to a spiritual entity, thereby losing control of my life. Studying,
working, Reiki and TM meditation were all a lot easier to do, because I
was always in control. This was just a little too tough to believe and
commit to.

313
SECOND CHANCE

314
 21 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

It took us over three hours to get to Godhra, slow going for a 75mile
journey as the crow flies. However, it seemed as if we had gone twice that
distance as the jeep slalomed along the road avoiding the potholes, cows,
camels, carts, cycles and people. Soon after passing Mehmedabad the
landscape turned from lush and green to semi-arid desert. We crossed
many river beds that were completely dry. Roshan told me that it had not
rained properly in this district for the last five years. Everything was
stubble and scorched. The people in the villages that we passed were thin,
their dark skins burnt and wizened by the relentless sun. This was meant
to be farming land. I wondered how anyone could eek out any kind of
existence from the land that I saw. I was glad that I was not living there.
We turned off the main highway shortly after we entered Godhra town
limits, into a small partly tarred road. From that road we turned off onto
a dirt track that led to a number of brightly coloured single storey houses.
A thin young man with a large beaming smile ran out of one the houses
towards the jeep. That is brother Samuel, Roshan told me.
„Hello brother. This is brother Arjuna,‟ said Roshan, as he got out of
the jeep, introducing me to Samuel.
Samuel held out his hand to shake mine, he was still smiling.
„Welcome to Godhra, please come in,‟ he said.
„We were expecting you over two hours ago. Was everything okay?‟
asked Samuel to Roshan.
„We left a little later than expected and there was a lot of traffic in
Ahmedabad,‟ replied Roshan.
Samuel took us into his home. The house was dark inside; the curtains
were closed in an attempt to keep the heat of the sun outside of the
house. It was a little cooler inside the house than outside, a large ceiling
fan gave a much needed draft of air. The room had a set of shelves, a TV
in one corner, and two of the small camp beds similar to the one that
315
 SECOND CHANCE

Roshan had in his home, and a small table in the middle of the room. It
seemed standard practice for camp beds to act as settees during the day
and beds during the night. There were three plates on the coffee table,
one was filled with various biscuits, the second was overflowing with
jalebi (the sugary swirls that I had eaten at Vaishali) and the third plate
was filled with what looked like fried dough balls.
„Wow, there is jalebi,‟ I said.
„Yes. Pastor Roshan said that you liked jalebi, so I got some especially
for you. Ruth has just gone to make the tea. Please sit down and make
yourself comfortable,‟ replied Samuel, still smiling.
„Thank you. I don‟t know what to say,‟ I was surprised at the effort that
Samuel had made to get the jalebi, for someone that he had never met
before.
Roshan said a prayer to thank Jesus for bringing us safely to Godhra
and for the food, before we had our tea and snacks.
It was a welcome relief to be out of the jeep in Samuel‟s home. We
didn‟t stay for long, within an hour we were on the road again. The road
from Godhra to Jalod, situated on the Gujarat and Rajasthan border, was
a lot worse than the road from Mehmedabad to Godhra. At one point it
took us an hour to travel 10 km, the potholes were a lot bigger and more
numerous. This journey was taking us a lot longer than I had expected,
and it was getting hotter and hotter both outside and inside the jeep. I
decided to sleep, hoping that it would make the time go faster.
Roshan woke me up with a nudge. „Get your camera ready we are about
to pass a special Rajasthan bus,‟ he said.
I got up and started to look for something big and red.
„Where is the bus ?‟ I asked.
„In front of us we are about to overtake it,‟ said Roshan.
I looked in front and I could see a jeep the same size as the one that we
were in a little ahead of us.
„That isn‟t a bus, it‟s a jeep,‟ I said.

Roshan, Samuel and Michael laughed. „It is a Rajasthan bus, get your
camera ready. You will not believe it,‟ chuckled Roshan.

316
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

Sure enough I did not believe it. There were over thirty five people in
the jeep. There were four in the front plus the driver, who was hanging
partly outside of the jeep so that he could see where he was going. It was
impossible for him to see through the windscreen as there were four
people sitting on the bonnet obstructing the view, another 11 people
sitting on the roof, six people in the back seat, three people hanging from
the left hand side, another person on the right hand side and seven
hanging on the back. 37 people in total, I would never have believed it
had I not seen it.
„That is how people travel here. Each of them will have paid two to five
rupees. There are no busses and they are too poor to even afford a
bicycle,‟ said Roshan.
A short while later we passed another „bus‟ that also had over thirty
people in it. After seeing the way that they were travelling I was relieved
that there were only five of us in this jeep. It could have been a lot worse.
We eventually got to Jalod. We found Kishore and Pravin waiting at the
main crossroad, near the market. They had been standing there waiting
for us for four hours. There had been no way to contact them, neither of
them had a phone line, and they did not have our numbers. Samuel had
written a letter a week earlier telling them to meet at the cross roads
outside the bakers shop at eleven in the morning. It was past three
o‟clock. I thought that this is what it must have been like before the
advent of telephones and mobiles; communication by letter only, people
waiting around expectantly. Neither Kishore nor Pravin were in the least
bit annoyed. They greeted with warm smiles and handshakes. If it was me
I would have been calling the person up if they were more than a couple
of minutes late and be fuming, yet these two had been standing outside in
the heat patiently for over four hours. Maybe they were used to it, I don‟t
think that I could ever get used to waiting that long.
Pravin and Kishore sat up in the front, squashed together with Michael
and Vijay the driver. Although there was more room in the back, they had
insisted on getting in the front as a sign of respect for me primarily, as
they knew coming from overseas that I was not used to, nor suited to
travelling around the way that they did. I was glad that they were so
considerate. My face was swelling up with the heat.
„So brother Pravin, what is the news?‟, asked Roshan in Gujarati. My
Gujarati had improved sufficiently to understand the conversation
between Roshan and Pravin.
„Praise the Lord! I have a wonderful testimony that I wish to share with
you,‟ replied Pravin.
„Praise the Lord Brother ! God is wonderful, he is a miracle, wonder
making God. Please tell me what he has been doing in your life. It will
encourage all of us,‟ said Roshan.

317
 SECOND CHANCE

„Two weeks ago I was walking along the road on the way back home
after visiting another brother. Suddenly a man jumped out from the
fields, in front of me holding a big knife. I recognised him as one of the
leaders of a gang that has been operating in this district. He told me to
hand over my money, watch and chain. I told him that I didn‟t have any
of those, that all I had were the clothes on my back and my shoes. I took
my shoes off and offered them to him with a smile. Our Lord Jesus has
told us that if someone asks for our tunic we should offer our cloak as
well.
The bandit looked at me. I smiled back at him still holding out my
shoes. He continued looking at me and then he asked „Why are you not
afraid of me.‟ I told him that I have nothing to fear because my God
Jesus is always with me, and he has promised to look after me as long as I
continue to believe in him. The bandit kept on looking at me, he lowered
his knife. Then he said „Tell me about this God, Jesus of yours‟. So I
started to tell him about how our Lord had come down to earth to die for
our sins, to save us, how he was crucified and rose back to life on the
third day, to prove to all of us that he was the true and living God, who is
the only one that has power over life and death.
The bandit sat down on the side of the road and started to cry whilst I
was telling him about Jesus. He said that he was sorry for trying to attack
me. I told him that I had forgiven him, but that he should say sorry to
Jesus for not behaving the way that God had intended him to behave and
for him to ask forgiveness from Jesus. He asked me to pray for him, I
told him that I would pray, and then he would have to repeat what I was
saying out loud, so that Jesus could hear him say it. We prayed together
and the bandit left.
Four days later at night time there was a loud knock on my door. I
wondered who it could be at such a late hour. I opened the door to see
the bandit standing in front of me with four other men. He told me how
after he had met me, he had had a dream where a figure in white had told
him to stop robbing and beating up people. From that day he had
stopped and told the rest of his gang about what I had said about Jesus.
The rest of the gang wanted to know more, so he found out where I lived
and brought them to me to find out more about Jesus. Praise the Lord !‟
with that Pravin finished his story.
„Praise the Lord indeed!‟ replied Roshan. „Brother Arjuna did you
understand what Brother Pravin just said about the bandit and the gang?‟
asked Roshan.
„Yes I did hear it. It sounds very strange. Has the bandit really stopped
robbing and beating up people ?‟
Roshan asked the question to Pravin in Gujarati. „Yes so far he has. He
has also been attending all the meetings that we have, he says that for the

318
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

first time in his life he feels loved and happy, he is praising Jesus all the
time. You will meet him today,‟ replied Pravin.
„I also have good news. But I will share it with you when we get to the
village, they are all waiting for us,‟ said Kishore.
We travelled for another hour along dirt tracks, up, down and around
hills. We eventually arrived at Kishore‟s village. It was a collection of four
houses around a clearing on top of a hill. In the clearing there was a well
and a couple of those wooden string beds that we had sat on at that
Vaishali restaurant. The houses were about twenty feet long and ten feet
wide. They were simply constructed, a wooden frame, a straw roof, with
stone and mud walls. The floors inside the house were a special
compacted mud, which I found out later on, was mixed with cow manure
acting as a sterilising agent and disinfectant. There were no windows just
a simple door that was mostly kept open. In the clearing there were a
couple of cows tied to a post which were lazily chewing on some straw.
Several baby billy goats were chasing a chicken around the clearing.
We got off the jeep and followed Kishore.
„Please come inside people will be waiting,‟ he said, as he led us into one
of the houses.
It was dark inside the house, but nice and cool. There were no fans or
electricity in this village. It took a while for my eyes to get accustomed to
the darkness. A little while later I saw that there were over thirty people
seated inside the house. The women were seated on one side, the men on
the other. The women had covered their heads with the fold of their
bright red and blue sarees, some of them were nursing young babies. In
the front, all of the young children were patiently and calmly seated. The
men were dressed in white in traditional costume. One of the men got up
and started to clap and sing. Everyone, including the children, started to
clap and sing in unison. I didn‟t understand what they were singing, but
they were definitely enjoying what they were singing.
Kishore led us to the back of the house so that we were sitting in front
of all the people that had gathered there. I could see that everyone was
smiling, some had their eyes closed and others had them open, everyone
looked so happy despite being in such poor and meagre conditions.
Kishore stood at the front, whilst we sat down, leading the group in
singing some more songs.
After the songs were over, Kishore introduced Roshan and he
introduced me as a special visitor all the way from London to the crowd
that had gathered there. Kishore then turned around to Roshan, and said:
„One of our congregation, brother Ram, has something special to tell all
of us.‟
Kishore then asked the gentleman who had led the first song to come
to the front. It was Brother Ram.

319
 SECOND CHANCE

Brother Ram spoke, in a local dialect, and Kishore translated it into

Gujarati. This is what Brother Ram said:
„Praise the Lord !‟ To which everyone responded with „Praise the Lord.‟
„I would like to thank our Pastor Roshan for blessing us with his
presence and wish the Pastor and our brother from London a warm
welcome to our village. Three days ago, our Lord Jesus Christ performed
an amazing miracle. I was sitting by the river bank in the morning praying
to God when I noticed that there was another man from the village,
Prafulbhai, standing quite deep in the water bathing. As you know the
water has been flowing quite strongly these past few days and so I was a
little surprised as to why he was standing so far into the water. It looked
dangerous to me. I went back to praying. I was disturbed by shouts for
help and saw that Prafulbhai had fallen into the water and was heading
towards a big rock in the middle. I saw him smash his head into the rock
with a lot of force, and then his body got sucked into the water.
His body was under water for a long time, several minutes. I prayed to
Jesus to save him. A short while later his body popped up downstream
from the rock quite close to where I was praying. I went into the water
and took him out. It took me a while. Prafulbhai is a very heavy man. He
was bleeding a lot from his head and his body was completely cold. I put
him on the side of the bank and noticed that he was not breathing. He
was dead. Last week Brother Kishore had told us about how Jesus had
raised people from the dead, and that Jesus had given us the power
through the Holy Spirit to do the same. So I just sat by the body and
prayed. I prayed for Jesus to come and bring Prafulbhai back from the
dead.
I prayed and prayed nothing happened. But I kept on praying, an hour
later Prafulbhai started breathing and opened his eyes. My Lord Jesus
Christ had raised him from the dead. Praise the Lord!‟ With that everyone
started to clap and say praise the Lord. Brother Ram sat down.
Kishore asked Roshan to say a few words. Roshan opened his bible and
spoke about having faith as small as a mustard seed. Kishore translated
what Roshan said into the local dialect. After the message there were
some more songs and then we left.
„So what do you think Brother Arjuna, is this enough evidence for you
that the Holy Spirit is working right here in this district, right now?‟ asked
Roshan.
„Well I must admit that the story of this bandit and the drowning man
are quite unusual, and the people do seem to be very happy. But the
bandit man may have been on the verge of giving up anyway. Besides we
don‟t know whether it is a temporary or permanent thing. As for the
drowned man, he may have just been unconscious and Brother Ram may
have mistaken it for his death,‟ I replied.

320
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

„My, my brother you are very sceptical. We are going to Brother

Pravin‟s village and you will meet the ex-bandit man. Then you tell me
what you think,‟ said Roshan.
It took another hour to get to Pravin‟s village. It was similar to
Kishore‟s village, except Pravin‟s village had only two homes rather than
the four in Kishore‟s.
We went into one of the homes and that was also full of people sitting
down. The men were seated on one side and the women on another. A
man was standing at the front dressed in white, leading the singing and
dancing. We sat down and took our places at the front of the seated
group. Pravin introduced the man dressed in white to Roshan and then to
me. The man was tall, with a moustache, muscular and well built. He was
smiling and had an air of peace about him.
„Brother Arjuna, let me introduce the man that we were talking about in
the car to you,‟ said Roshan as he introduced me to bandit man.
It was difficult to imagine that this man could have been a bandit just a
few weeks before.
„Can I ask him a question, will you translate?‟ I asked.
„Yes of course, Pravin will translate for you,‟ replied Roshan.
„How do you feel now compared to how you used to feel?‟ I asked.
Pravin translated and the bandit man responded, „I am so much at
peace now. I have the love of Lord Jesus inside me.‟
„How do you know that it is Jesus?‟ I asked.
„Jesus told me, and I just know. For many years I was praying to Shiva,
and I had never felt this way. I love Lord Jesus,‟ as he was saying this, the
bandit man started crying. It was very odd to see such a man cry.
The bandit man sat down. We sang a few more songs, Roshan gave a
message, and we sang a few more songs. That night we drove back to
Jalod and found a small guest house to stay the night.
The next morning we got up early and as we were having our tea
together Roshan said,
„So Brother Arjuna did you notice something yesterday?‟
„Notice something. What do you mean ?‟ I asked.
„Something about the people, did you notice anything?‟
„Well they did seem to be very happy, happier than some of the other
people that we have met around here,‟ I replied.
„Yes they are full of the Holy Spirit, the love of Jesus. They are also all
illiterate yet they understand about Jesus. They cannot read bibles, but yet
they understand. This is the working of the Holy Spirit. Only the Holy
Spirit can do such things and change the life of that bandit and bring a
drowned man back to life,‟ said Roshan.
I remembered reading about this phenomenon in Jackie Pullinger‟s
book, „Chasing the dragon‟, where she described how Chinese men and
women would spontaneously know about Jesus‟ death and resurrection
321
 SECOND CHANCE

on the cross, and that they instantly understood what it meant. They
didn‟t read anything nor did anyone explain it to them. I am no idiot, and
I was finding it difficult to make sense of the death and resurrection of
Jesus. I had dismissed Jackie‟s account as being somewhat made up or
exaggerated, yet here I was listening to a similar experience of these rural
illiterate Indians.
I didn‟t say anything but just nodded my head. It was too early in the
morning to argue. That day we visited three more villages. In each village
we were greeted by welcoming smiles and joyous singing. They did seem
exceptionally happy, made all the more surprising by their level of
poverty and the daily hardships that they were enduring. They didn‟t need
wealth to make them happy, and despite all the things I had in London I
don‟t think that I had reached a fraction of the level of happiness that
they seemed to have.
But was the cause of this happiness the Holy Spirit, as Roshan declared,
or was it something else? I had expected to see something that would not
leave any shadow of doubt one way or the other. That had not happened.
The next day we returned to Ahmedabad, I was none the wiser.
„So how did it go?‟ asked Rita when I got home.
„It was interesting. The people I met were incredibly friendly and were
happy despite not having very much. They all really believe in Jesus and
this Holy Spirit thing. One man claimed that the Holy Spirit had brought
a drowned man back to life,‟ I replied.
„What was that about a drowned man?‟ asked Rita.
„I said that someone claimed that the Holy Spirit had brought a man
back to life. But I doubt whether it really happened that way, the man was
probably just knocked out for a while rather than really dead. I just don‟t
feel that I am making much head way. They were happy enough believing
what they were believing. Maybe it really doesn‟t matter what you believe
in, as long as you believe in it. I don‟t know.‟
„Someone called Samson, left a message for you to call him. Who is he?‟
asked Rita.
„He was someone I met when I was with Big Group, while you were
still in London. I wonder what he wants. Did he leave a number?‟
Rita handed me a piece of paper with Samson‟s home number on it. We
had met a couple of times whilst I was in Mumbai and got on quite well. I
wondered how he had tracked my number down. That evening I called
him.
„Hello is that Samson ? It‟s Arjuna, how are you ?‟ I asked.
„I‟m fine, mustn‟t grumble. Thank you for calling back,‟ said Samson.
„It‟s great to hear from you. How did you get hold of my number ?‟
„It‟s a long story. I had to phone a number of people before I tracked
you down in Ahmedabad. What are you doing there ?‟ asked Samson.

322
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

I wondered whether I should tell him. If I was still at Big Group I

wouldn‟t have, but I had left and I was unlikely to have any business
dealings with Samson. I decided to tell him.
„That is also a long story. If I told you why we are here you wouldn‟t
believe me.‟
„Try me.‟
„Well you‟ll probably think that I am crazy in telling you this, but God
kind of told us to come here,‟ I replied.
There was silence on the other end of the phone.
„Hello Samson are you there? I told you that it sounds crazy didn‟t I ?‟
„Well it‟s not as crazy as what I am going to tell you. God told me to call
you and invite you to our church service next Sunday,‟ said Samson.
I didn‟t even know that Samson was a Christian. This was getting very
weird.
„God told you to invite me to your church service?‟
„Yes. He told me a while ago to do this, but I didn‟t do it. The thought
just wouldn‟t go away. I couldn‟t sleep so I decided the only thing to do
was to call you. I called Big Group and found out that you had left them,
so it took me a while to track you down. I know that it is very strange
but can you come next Sunday to Mumbai?‟ asked Samson.
„This is so strange. I have just come back from a trip visiting villages in
Rajasthan to see the Holy Spirit. I didn‟t see the Holy Spirit, and now you
are calling me to come to church. I didn‟t know that you were into all of
that.‟
„Well the subject never came up. Can you come on Sunday?‟ asked
Samson again.
„This is so strange. What can I say? Let me discuss it with Rita and we
will try and come down, may be we‟ll just fly in for the day. What time
and where is the service?‟
„The service starts at 11am and it is at the Hiranandani Complex in
Powai. You can have lunch with me and the family after the service. I can
come and pick you up from the airport and drop you off after lunch.‟
„You really want me to come don‟t you ?‟
„Yes I really want you to come. It has been troubling me for the last five
weeks.‟
„Okay I‟ll see whether I can make it. I‟ll call you tomorrow to confirm
whether or not we will be there.‟
Rita could not believe what I was telling her. I eventually managed to
convince her that we should go. The next day I booked the tickets and
confirmed the arrangements with Samson. I called Roshan to let him
know that I would not be coming to Faith Church that Sunday, he asked
why and I told him. His response was „Praise the Lord, Brother the Spirit
is trying to tell you something.‟

323
 SECOND CHANCE

Spirit or not, I was beginning to think that I was going totally mad,
rushing around India looking for something, and not knowing what I was
looking for. Samson and Daphne his wife were there at the airport on
Sunday morning to pick us up.
„I am glad that you could make it,‟ said Samson.
„Thanks for picking us up. Are we going straight to the church?‟ I asked.
„Yes we are. The church is not exactly a church, we meet in a banquet
reception hall in the Hiranandani complex,‟ said Samson sheepishly.
„Don‟t worry. I‟m getting used to going to churches that are not
churches,‟ I replied.
We got to the Hiranandani complex, a sort of Milton Keynes in
Mumbai. All the roads were well constructed, large super markets, proper
pavements and clean streets. A private complex designed and constructed
by the Hiranandani family. Samson parked his car opposite the
supermarket. We had arrived at the Church at Powai. The meeting was in
a hall in the basement of a building which was in between the
Supermarket and the Rodas Hotel. The first floor of the building had an
Indian version of a Virgin Megastore. I marvelled at how different India
can be. Just several days earlier I had been in a mud hut „church‟ and
today I was in surroundings that were reminiscent of Manhattan.
The hall was filling up. There was another fifteen minutes before the
start of the service.
„Let me introduce you to our Pastor,‟ said Samson.
„Yes of course.‟
„Pastor, this is my friend Arjuna from Ahmedabad,‟ said Samson.
„Hello and welcome to the house of the Lord. Samson has told me
about you and I am so glad that you can make it. Today we are having a
slightly unusual service. Someone will be sharing their testimony with us
today. I would like to talk to you more, do you have time after the service
?‟ asked the Pastor.
I looked at Samson.
„Yes Pastor, we do have some time. I have invited Arjuna and his wife
for lunch, perhaps you would like to join us?‟
„Thank you for the offer, it is a shame to miss Daphne‟s cooking but I
already agreed to have lunch with today‟s speaker. Please excuse me, I
have to make some final preparations for the service,‟ said the Pastor.
I shook hands with the Pastor and then sat down waiting for the service
to start. The Pastor stood up said a prayer and then sang several songs
after which he introduced the guest speaker.
„Dear friends, today we have a guest speaker. He was born in Mumbai,
he studied at the IIT in Bangalore, had a fast track career in Hindustan
Lever, before winning a scholarship to study at Harvard. He came back
to India and is a partner at McBain Consulting Group in Delhi. Please
welcome Dharmendra Chauhan.‟
324
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

We all clapped. A man in his thirties dressed in a well pressed suit stood
up and took the podium.
„Good morning everyone. I would like to thank the Lord Jesus Christ
for all that he has done in my life and the blessing that he has given to
me. I would like to thank the Pastor for giving an opportunity to share
what Lord Jesus has done in my life.
As the Pastor said, I was born in Mumbai into a Hindu family. My
parents were devout practicing Hindus, and I would go to the temple
with them regularly. God blessed me with intelligence and I was fortunate
enough to study at IIT and go to Harvard. Many of my friends and family
were surprised when I came back from Harvard to India. The truth is
that I did not like what I saw in America. I did not like the way that
people were living, they did not seem to have any standards for
behaviour. Many people were obsessed with materialism, most people
were divorced, and children were out of control.
The group that I found the most obnoxious were Church goers. They
were worse because they were the most hypocritical, they were the same
as the rest of the people. Many were divorced, concerned with
appearances and material things. Yet they liked to tell everyone else how
superior they were. I did not like them nor did I like what I saw in
America. The Hindu values that I had been taught by my parents and
which are still primarily practiced in India were, in my opinion, morally
superior. I do not like saying this, but this is what I observed and felt, that
is why I came back. I didn‟t want to have anything to do with Christians.
I came back to India. I had one of the highest paying jobs in the
country with McBain Consulting Group. By now I was married and had
children. I was supposed to be happy. But I was not. I felt emptiness
inside of me.
Someone in the office recommended a meditation technique called
Reiki, they told me that practicing Reiki had brought tremendous peace
to them. So I decided to do Reiki. Within a year I was a Reiki Master. I
did find that while I was doing the meditation I felt good, but I noticed
that when I was not doing the meditation I was restless and easily
annoyed and angered. My wife told me that I had become more
intolerant and more difficult to live with. Something was not correct.
Then one day I had a meeting with a client here in the Hiranandani
complex. I had arrived early for the meeting and was in the Rodas Hotel
having a coffee, waiting for the meeting to start. It was then that I met
your Pastor, Pastor Cecil. He came and sat down next to me as there
were no other places left. We started talking, just the usual chit chat,
where are you from and what do you do, and so and so. While we were
talking I got a phone call from my office saying that the meeting that I
was to have was cancelled. I was annoyed, because the next flight to
Delhi wasn‟t for another four hours.
325
 SECOND CHANCE

By now Pastor had been asking all the questions. I hadn‟t really wanted
to talk so I had just been responding to the questions rather than asking
Pastor Cecil anything. Now that the meeting was cancelled, and I praise
Jesus that the meeting was cancelled, I asked Cecil what he did. He told
me that he was a Pastor of a church, which surprised me. I wondered
why any Indian would want to believe in Jesus when we as Hindus had a
far superior way of living than any Christian that I had known in Boston,
America.
The Pastor told me how one day Jesus had talked to him and that it had
transformed his life. It was a strange thing to hear. I must say that Pastor
Cecil was quite different from the other Christians that I had met. It got
me wondering. I then started talking about Reiki and told him that I
believed that Jesus had used Reiki to perform miracles and that I was
using a similar technique, so I knew about Jesus. It was then that the
Pastor took out a book that he was carrying. I have it here with me it is
„The Tao of Reiki‟ written by an Australian Reiki Master whose name is
Lawrence Ellyard.
I was a little surprised that he was carrying a book on Reiki and I asked
him why he had it with him. His answer was even more surprising. Pastor
Cecil told me how a few days earlier he had been in a bookshop looking
for some books on computers, and he had been directed by Jesus to
purchase this book. He had wondered why Jesus would ask him to buy
such a book, as he had absolutely no interest in Reiki or any other forms
of meditation. Anyway, Pastor was obedient to God and bought the
book. Pastor told me that Lawrence Ellyard describes the true origins of
Reiki. He didn‟t tell me anymore but handed me the book and asked me
to accept it as a gift. Just then my phone rang, someone else at the client
would like to meet with me, if I was still in the area, I said that I would
go.
I said good bye to Pastor Cecil and gave him my business card and said
good bye, thinking what a strange meeting. On the way back to Delhi, I
read the book and was amazed at what I was reading.
Lawrence Ellyard demonstrated that Reiki had absolutely nothing to do
with Jesus and that the whole story about Jesus and Reiki had been made
up by a Japanese lady called Mrs Takata who had gone to live in America
after the second World War. The story about Jesus and Reiki was a lie
that she made up in an attempt to market Reiki in a Christian society.
There was no reason for Ellyard to lie and the rest of his book accurately
described everything that I had been told by my guru.‟ Dharmendra
stopped and drank a glass of water. He looked straight at me and smiled.
I was wondering whether what Dharmendra was saying was true.
Anand had been very emphatic with me that Jesus was using Reiki and
that Reiki and Christianity and Hinduism are really all the same. I
wondered where I could buy a copy of the book.
326
 LIFE CHANGING STORIES

Dharmendra continued to speak: „The book really made me think. If

this lady, Mrs Takata, who was a Reiki Master could lie about Reiki being
used by Jesus then what other lies had she told, and surely the whole
point of Reiki was that it was supposed to make you a better person, who
didn‟t lie and cheat and do all the other things that most people seem to
do. I was quite shaken up by the book. A week later I received another
book from Pastor Cecil,‟ Dharmendra paused again and lifted up another
book.
„Choose Life‟, he continued, „it is a simplified version of the New
Testament. Pastor Cecil had written a note saying, read this book and you
will find out the truth about Jesus. Jesus was not a Reiki Master. I read
the book. I was amazed at how many miracles Jesus had performed. This
book also had explanations of various things. I learnt from the book that
Jesus had come on earth to sacrifice himself for us, dying and raising
himself up on the third day to prove that he had power over life and
death, showing that he could give the promise of eternal life.
I am very familiar with a lot of the Hindu Gods, many of them have
come on earth, but I know that none of them came to earth to be brutally
killed and buried, and then raise themselves from death into a resurrected
body three days later. It is true that they are supposed to have ascended
to heaven but none of them appeared again to the people in a new
resurrected body, and none had willingly given themselves as a sacrifice
for humans. When I realised this I started to cry. I had this picture of
Jesus dying on the cross for me.
I put the book down and picked it up again, somehow the pages of the
book had been turned and I was in a different part of the book which
was explaining some of the characteristics of the devil. I did not know
much about the devil, so I started to read it. There was a quote in the
explanation which I would like to read out to you it says in 2 Corinthians
chapter 11 verse 14:
‗And no wonder for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.‘
I read this a couple of times. This verse had a profound impact on me,
because when I was doing the Reiki, my whole body was flooded with
white light. I wondered whether that white light had been Satan trying to
deceive me.
I don‟t know what prompted me to do what I did next. I went back into
Reiki meditation. I was soon flooded with white light. Out loud I asked
God to reveal to me the source of this light. I was amazed at what I saw
and heard.
I saw that the light came from this big golden throne. In the middle of
this throne was a big black figure, with a red tongue and red eyes. The
figure was hissing at me, it was quite frightening. On either side of this
figure were two other dark figures that were beating on drums. The white
327
 SECOND CHANCE

light was coming from this throne in rhythm with the drums. It was
terrifying. Just then, another stream of light entered my vision from the
right hand side. This light was also white, but it was a soft blue white.
Then I heard a voice which said „Now my son this is the true light.‟ I
knew that it was Jesus speaking to me. I started to cry.
At that point I realised that the meditation white light was coming from
Satan and that it was full of power; and that power makes you hungry for
more power. Whereas this other light, from Jesus was full of love and
love fills you up. I had found what I was looking for. I had been empty
inside because I did not have the love of Jesus.
Since that day I have been filled with the love of Jesus, Amen,‟
Dharmendra was crying as he said the last few words and then sat down.
Everyone started clapping and saying Praise the Lord.
I wondered what to make of it. Was it real or just something that
Dharmendra had imagined. He was annoyed with his Reiki teacher for
lying to him according to the book by Ellyard, and he had just read the
passage about Satan and light. He could have quite easily imagined it all.
„Would you like to meet Dharmendra?‟ whispered Samson to me.
Reluctantly I agreed. There were many people standing around him,
eventually we got our chance.
Dharmendra looked into my eyes. I mumbled, „that was very
interesting,‟ just to be polite.
He then thrust the two books, Tao of Reiki and Choose Life into my
hands and said, „May the peace of Lord Jesus Christ be with you and may
he help you find what you are looking for. This is a gift from Jesus.‟
With that he left. I said „Thank you‟ but he didn‟t hear. The Pastor
whisked him into another room. We didn‟t get to meet with the Pastor
and went to Samson‟s for lunch.
I was feeling very tired with the early morning flight to Mumbai and
was not in a mood to discuss what Dharmendra had said or speculate
why he had given me those two books. I was grateful that Samson did
not ask any questions about the service but kept the conversation on
general matters. Daphne was a very good cook. He dropped us of at the
airport and I slept for most of the journey, as did Rita.

328
 22 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD
Over the last several days, Dharmendra‟s testimony had haunted me.
Was Reiki really demonic as he was implying or was it something that he
had imagined? This was getting really too crazy. Then there were all these
Christians talking about signs and wonders, the spiritual, the magical.
Then there was Roshan‟s explanation of why Jesus Christ came and died
on the cross and all these things about the Holy Spirit. Was the Holy
Spirit the same as Shaktipat? I wondered whether Jesus was different
from Krishna. Were all these things really different, or did they just have
different names?
I was pondering these things when Samson called.
„Hello Arjuna, Samson here, how are you?‟
„I am fine. Thanks very much for lunch the other day.‟
„You are welcome. Did you like the service ?‟ asked Samson.
„I am not sure whether I liked the service. But it has really made me
think. I would say I am more confused now than I was before, so in that
sense I am not sure whether it really was that helpful.‟
„I thought that might be the case. You were very quiet after the service.
I felt that you were really thinking hard, that you wanted to be alone with
your thoughts.‟
„That‟s very true, Samson. I have been thinking a lot about what
Dharmendra said. I can‟t help feeling that there is some connection in
what he said, and some of the things that I have personally experienced.
But no matter how hard I try, I just can‟t seem to work out what the
connection is.‟
„I may have a solution for you,‟ said Samson.
„What‟s that?‟ I asked curiously.
„Next weekend there is a conference on apologetics run by Ravi
Zacharias in Hyderabad. Ravi is arguably one of the best Christian
apologists in the world today. He is an amazing speaker, and has
329
 SECOND CHANCE

tremendous insight into Christianity and other world religions. If there is

anyone that can help you make that „connection‟, it is Ravi. God spoke to
me this morning and urged me to book myself and you into that
conference. I was reluctant at first. I wasn‟t sure if it would be of interest
to you, and that it would be too presumptuous of me to book you into a
conference in Hyderabad. But, this thought kept on coming up in my
head. I couldn‟t concentrate on anything else. So I have booked a place
for you at the conference. I really feel that you should come.‟
„Hyderabad. That is a long way, away. I am not sure. It‟s such short
notice,‟ I replied hesitantly.
„I know that it is short notice. But, I really do feel that you should come,
this could be the missing connection that you are looking for,‟ replied
Samson.
I was pondering on what Samson had said. On the one hand, I was
thinking that everyone I spoke to, had a different opinion, each new
opinion brought more confusion than clarity. I was reluctant to add to
that confusion by listening to this Ravi Zacharias. On the other hand, I
felt that I was so confused already, that listening to one more opinion
wouldn‟t make it any more confusing. Besides there was a chance that
Samson might be right, that Ravi could have the missing connection.
„Hello Arjuna, are you still there ?‟ asked Samson.
„Yes I am still here. I was just thinking.‟
Then I remembered the recurring dream that I used to have, about
sculpting this beautiful girl with a veil in Hyderabad. I had felt that it had
been one of my past lives. I had always wanted to go to Hyderabad but
had never been. This was as good a chance as any. What would Rita say?
„Look, let me think about it. What is apologetics? I‟ve never heard of it.‟
„Apologetics, comes from the Greek word apologia, which means to
have an answer, a logical reasoned argument that supports why you
believe what you believe. It is a branch of philosophy and theology. Ravi
Zacharias is an expert in this field. He will give an apologetic as to why he
believes in Christianity, giving objective logical reasoning rather than
relying purely on subjective experiential phenomena,‟ replied Samson.
„I‟ve never heard of it. But it does sound very interesting. Is there a
website or something that I can go to, to find out more about apologetics
and this Ravi Zacharias guy?‟ I asked.
„It is very interesting. I think it is something that will really appeal to
you, given the way that you think. There is a website www.rzim.org , you
can check it out. I have already booked us in at the conference and a
room at the ITT Sheraton in Hyderabad. I am going, if you are there,
you‟re there. You can even decide on Saturday morning and fly into
Hyderabad. I hope that you do come. Do take your time to think about
it.‟
„Okay, I‟ll think about it and let you know. Thanks for calling.‟
330
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

„You‟re welcome,‟ replied Samson, after which he hung up the phone.

I went onto the website address that Samson had given me. I went first
to the description of RZIM, which stood for Ravi Zacharias International
Ministries. This is the description that I found on the website:
‗In a generation not unlike ours, Jesus declared, ―You will know the Truth and
the Truth will set you free.‖ Throughout history the message of Christ has faced
significant challenges from other worldviews, from the academy, and from culture.
And understandably so, for Jesus claimed to be unique in every way.
Is a message so exclusive plausible? We believe it is, and we at Ravi Zacharias
International Ministries seek to reach and challenge those who shape the ideas of a
culture with the credibility and the beauty of the gospel of Jesus Christ. To the
questions of the sceptic and the believer we offer an apologetic – we give an answer
– to the counterclaims of secularism and other worldviews. We address the
intellectual and essential assumptions of our culture, realizing that for some, the
door to the heart is through the mind, and for others through the imagination.
With a team of individuals based in six countries, RZIM is committed to reaching
this generation around the world - in the university, the arts, politics, business, and
the church. Through open forums, community outreach, and various media, we seek
to remove the barriers to the cross for the sceptic and we prepare Christians to give
a reason for the hope within us.
Ravi Zacharias International Ministries - stirring the imagination and impelling
the mind to see the beauty and credibility of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.‘
„Is a message so exclusive plausible?‟ These words echoed in my mind.
There were so many good things about the message of Christ, but it was
this issue of exclusivity that continued to bug me. If it was true, then
what were all those spiritual experiences that I had felt? What about the
gurus in India, they definitely had spiritual power, but they never claimed
exclusivity, nor did they have anything to do with Jesus Christ. This really
puzzled me, if Ravi Zacharias could give me an „apologetic‟ for this then
it would be worth going to Hyderabad.
I looked around on the website, to see if I could find out more. I came
across this interview of Ravi Zacharias conducted by Julia Duin, of the
Washington Times:
‗Indian-born Ravi Zacharias, who grew up steeped in Hinduism, is one of the first
Christian apologists to come out of the Third World. Headquartered in Atlanta,
his expertise on comparative religions has earned him audiences from Capitol Hill
to Harvard. The following are excerpts from an interview by Julia Duin with Mr.
Zacharias, who was in town recently for a lecture at the C.S. Lewis Institute.
Q: How do you present the uniqueness of Christianity?

331
 SECOND CHANCE

A: I am totally convinced that the Christian faith is the most coherent worldview
around. Everyone: pantheist, atheist, skeptic, polytheist has to answer these
questions: Where did I come from? What is life's meaning? How do I define right
from wrong and what happens to me when I die? Those are the fulcrum points of
our existence. I deal with cultural issues whether they are in the Middle East, Far
East, the Orient or the West. You broach questions in the context of their culture
and then present Christian answers.
Q: Why do you call "Jesus Among Other Gods" your most
significant book?
A: There was no life so impeccably lived as His. There are those who've claimed
prophetic status who have led pretty heavily duplicitous lives. But in Christ, you
never see that. You never find Him in any compromising situation that shows itself
where He was driven by the sensuality of the moment. After 2000 years, no name
has been scrutinized more; none abused or challenged more in the public media.
I find a lot of Western journalists intellectually cowardly here. They would never do
with Mohammed what they do with Jesus. They don't have the courage to do that.
If the major magazines — Time, Newsweek or U.S. News and World Report
— did with Mohammed on one of their major festivals what they do to Jesus on
Christmas or Easter, they probably wouldn't be in existence any more.
Q: Why are people so fascinated with Eastern religions?
A: Because they give you the privilege of morality without having God. Even
aspects of the entire New Age movement are a moralizing philosophy without the
positing of a central deity. Buddhism also gives you that. Baha‘ism gives you a
pluralistic view, and a lot of aspects of Hinduism give you a moral framework with
no accountability other than the karmic system. There's no linear movement or
point of accountability toward God.
I was in a hearing with [former presidential speechwriter] Peggy Noonan years ago
and she asked this question: Do terrorists fear anything? I said, 'I suspect they
would fear a morally strong America.' They would know that a morally strong
America would not be dislodged. You can always appeal to a point of vulnerability
which would break a people up. [Terrorists] don't fear so much the weaponry as
the moral courage, and I think a morally strong America would be intimidating to
them.
Q: What has been your experience on American campuses?
A: If I speak on Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam or whatever, I am quite free to do it
without any repercussions. But if you speak on the Christian faith, somebody is
going to question why you are there. You talk to any Christian campus group on
any major campus and they'll tell you about the intimidation there.
It's sad. I lived in India, then in Canada and then I've come here. America seems
to take a hit for everything it does. But worse can be done in other parts of the
332
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

world and it will be done with impunity. For instance, racism: I could take you to
parts of the world today where racism is horrible, blatant. The same people, who
will tell you that, are the ones who will take us to task. I will tell you what is
hidden under all of this. I believe because we live under the outworking of a
Christian worldview, we are willing to face the self-criticism and scrutiny. Other
worldviews are not willing to lend themselves to that.
Q: How much freedom do you have in Muslim countries?
A: [Muslims] will tell you there is no compulsion in religion. I was with the
minister of religion of a major country that I will leave unnamed. He was a very
courteous man and he was talking about the work they were doing. They had just
met in Malaysia about improving the image of Islam.
I asked, 'Why do you feel it needs to be improved?' He said, 'Well, September 11.
We are often represented as using compulsion in religion.' I said, 'I don't want to
be discourteous, but if I were in your country and I were a Muslim, would I be free
to disagree with it?' He said, 'Why would you want to do that?' I said, 'No, I am
just asking theologically: Would I be free to disbelieve it?'
He said, 'Well, these things get more complicated when you deal with a country's
laws and all.' I said, 'When you say there is no compulsion in religion, you are
looking at one side of the coin, meaning you will never force someone to become
what you are. But to have no compulsion means you should not compel somebody to
believe something when they want to disbelieve it. That is a very critical test for
compulsion.
There is no law in the land where I live, compelling me to [be a Christian]. But in
your land, if I chose to disbelieve [Islam], I have to stand before a tribunal of
justices and explain it. How can I withstand such intimidation and be honest and
not pay for it at the same time?
Frankly, he wouldn't give me an answer. I think if Islam is going to rise to the
level many moderates want to see it, they will have to take off the heavy foot of
compulsion in their own lands. Then it can be a legitimate representation of how
many believe.
Q: How can Christianity meet the needs of a place like India?
A: I was born and raised in Bombay and I go back there twice a year. India is
agony writ large. The voices of the millions are not heard. Walk through the streets
of Calcutta and it hits you. At the same time, it's the center of India's learning.
Some of her greatest philosophers come from Calcutta. The first thing Christianity
does is raise the level of every individual. There's an essential dignity. Every human
being is of essential worth.
The second thing it does is give the impetus to love and reach out in a way that
rescues the person, not just the function. Look at where the missionary
organizations — the hospitals, orphanages and health care — came from. I spoke
333
 SECOND CHANCE

three weeks ago at Bahrain at the 100th anniversary of the American missionary
hospital. Many of the sheiks were born there and several were represented in the
audience to which I spoke. From where came the impetus? It came from the love of
Christ.
Q: What does American culture need rescuing from?
A: What America needs more than anything else right now is to know she cannot
exist without the worldview that helped bring her into being. And that was the
Judeo-Christian worldview. What America also needs is the willingness to allow
the Christian faith freedom of access in the institutions that it allows every other
faith to have.
Isn't it interesting that when these mainline divinity schools were conservative, room
was given for the liberals. But they have become liberal and the conservatives are
squeezed out, if not humiliated out, which is a fascinating reality.‘
Ravi Zacharias appeared to have very thoughtful and intelligent answers
to the reporter‟s questions. He had not blindly quoted Bible Scripture to
dogmatically support his viewpoint, but reasoned logic. This was
something new to me. He had grown up in India and was living in the
US, he knew the two cultures: east and west. Perhaps, here was someone,
whom I could relate to, someone who could give me the connecting
jigsaw piece. I decided to go to Hyderabad.
Rita was very annoyed, another weekend, and I was off again.
„This is the last time I‟m allowing you to go. You are getting totally
obsessed and sucked into going here, and going there. Don‟t you think
that God is everywhere; you don‟t need to be rushing around India, trying
to find him. Just sit still, and he will find you, the problem with you is
that you are never in one place long enough, for him to catch you,‟ she
said.
I promised that it would be the last time. This quest for truth was
becoming a little obsessive, Rita was right. I was rushing around from
here to there. This was going to be my last, such trip.
I got ready to go to Hyderabad. I hadn‟t realised that it was such a large
city, a population of over 4.5 million people. There was a tremendous
history behind this place, which I only found out after reading a guide
book. The Koh-I-Noor diamond that sits in the centre of the crown,
worn by Queen Elizabeth on her coronation, came from the diamond
mines near Hyderabad. I read that Hyderabad was the most important
centre of Muslim power in central and south India from the 15th to the
19th centuries. It was founded by the 5th sultan of Golconda, Muhammad
Quli Qutb Shah in 1589. It was planned in a grid pattern with enormous
arches. Within the city were located many examples of fine architecture
and many museums. The Salar Jung Museum was especially
recommended to visit. Hyderabad was also famous for inventing Biryani,
334
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

which was one of my favourites, a dish which consisted of rice cooked

with either lamb or chicken. I was looking forward to seeing Hyderabad
for myself.
The conference was starting on the Saturday. I decided to go a day
earlier, to see the many sites and visit the Salar Jung Museum. Samson
was going to come on the day of the conference. Hyderabad was about
an hour and half plane journey from Bombay, I had taken the first flight
out to maximise my time in Hyderabad. If this was going to be my last
trip, as I had promised Rita, then I better make the most of it. I got to the
hotel, the Maurya Sheraton, by nine in the morning. My room wasn‟t
ready, and I was asked to wait in the reception.
I sunk into one of the leather armchairs, in the reception lobby, and
made myself comfortable. It was a large, high vaulted ceiling, bright and
airy lobby. There was a lot of activity around the reception, mostly people
checking out. It was a busy time of day. I hadn‟t been sitting long before
a thin old man, with a long grey beard, and round goggle like spectacles,
sat down in the armchair next to me. I looked at him and smiled. He
smiled back.
I said „Hello‟. It was going to be a while before my room was going to
be ready, and what better way to pass the time, then talking to somebody.
The old man looked at me quizzically. I said „Hello‟ again; perhaps he
hadn‟t heard me the first time. He smiled at me again, and said „Salaam‟
and held out his hand.
„Good morning, my name is Arjuna,‟ I smiled and shook his hand.
„You are not from this country?‟ the old man asked.
„No I am from England, but I am living in Ahmedabad at the moment.
I have come to Hyderabad to attend a conference, to know about God,‟ I
replied.
The old man, smiled, paused a little and said:
„Please note one and all,
The Imam is waiting for your call
To greet you with salaam
Spreading friendly charm
Inviting you to study the Qur‟an
Increasing your knowledge and Iman
Bringing us closer to Islam
To give us peace and calm
Inshallah. Ameen.‟
The old man was smiling throughout, whilst he recited this very unusual
poetic ode. I had never been greeted like this, especially by a complete
stranger. I was a little lost for words.
„I have never been greeted like that,‟ I said.
„Yes. You must never fear, because the Imam is here,‟ he replied, again
in rhyme.
335
 SECOND CHANCE

„Are you an Imam?‟ I asked.

„Yes I am an Imam, Shaukat Mohammed Ali Khan,‟ he held out his
hand in friendship, and we shook hands once again.
„Pleased to meet you, I have never met an Imam,‟ I replied. I was very
surprised that an Imam could be so friendly. I had always expected
Imams to be unfriendly and hostile, like Osama bin Laden.
„Are you from Hyderabad?‟ I asked.
„Yes I was born in Hyderabad, but I left to go to England, I am an
Imam in Bedford. I am just visiting my family here for a few days, before
I go back to England. You said that you came here for a conference to
find out about God?‟ asked the Imam.
This was very unusual to be sitting next to an Imam from England in a
hotel lobby in Hyderabad, India.
„Yes I am here for a conference, it starts tomorrow. It‟s by someone
called Ravi Zacharias,‟ I replied.
The Imam smiled and remained silent.
„Did you come up with that poem?‟ I asked.
„Yes. I find that people are often very scared to speak to an Imam.
Imams can look very intimidating, but behind that exterior, they are
friendly people. You see, Islam, itself means peace. So an Imam is a
teacher of peace, and such a person is always friendly.‟
„Does Islam really mean peace?‟ I asked. This was quite contrary to
what I had been led to believe, especially after the 9 /11 attacks on the
World Trade Centre.
„Yes Islam does mean peace. Most people do not understand Islam, or
the Qur‟an, they have got the wrong impression. They think that we are
all blood thirsty,‟ replied the Imam.
„I must admit, that is the impression that I have always had. I must also
admit that I do not know anything about Islam.‟
„You want to find out about God, and you have not read the Qur‟an?‟
„No I have not read the Qur‟an.‟
„Praise be to Allah, that I met you today,‟ the Imam smiled again.
Could this be a coincidence that I was sitting next to an Imam?
„Can you explain Islam to me, do you have time?‟ I asked.
„I always have to time to talk about and explain Islam,‟ replied the
Imam.
„Can you talk to me right now and explain Islam, can it be done now?‟ I
asked.
„Yes it can. Islam is the most straightforward, logical and truthful
religion. It has three foundations: tawhid, risalah and akhirah. The first,
Tawhid, is that there is only one God and that is Allah. In the Holy
Qur‟an, Surah number 112, it is written:
‗Say he is Allah, the One and Only;

336
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

Allah, the Eternal, Absolute;

He begetteth not, nor is he begotten;
And there is none like unto him.‘
The second, Risalah, is that the Holy Qur‟an is the final and true
revelation that is given to the great prophet, Mohammed, as it is written
in Surah 2, „Al Baqarah, The Cow‟:
‗This is the Book; in it is guidance sure, without doubt, to those who fear Allah‘
The third and final foundation is Akhirah, that there is only one life,
one resurrection and one final judgement. The judgement is described in
Surah 99, Al Zalzalah, The Earthquake:
When the Earth is shaken its utmost convulsion,
And the Earth throws up its burden from within
And man cries distressed; what is the matter with it?
On that Day will it declare its tidings;
For that thy Lord will have given it inspiration,
On that Day will men proceed in companies sorted out,
To be shown the Deeds that they had done.
Then shall anyone who has done an atom‘s weight of good, see it !
And anyone who has done an atom‘s weight of evil, shall see it. ‘
„You said that the Holy Qur‟an is the final revelation, and what are all
these Surahs, that you keep on mentioning?‟ I asked.
„Yes it is correct, the Holy Qur‟an is the final revelation. The Holy
Qur‟an is divided into 114 Surahs, and thirty parts. The Holy Qur‟an was
revealed to the great prophet, Mohammed, by the angel Gabriel.‟
„The angel Gabriel ? The same angel Gabriel that came to Mary to
announce the birth of Jesus Christ ?‟ I asked.
„Yes it is the same angel Gabriel. The father of all religions is Ibrahim.
His eldest son Ishmael is the father of the great prophet Mohammed and
nations of Arabia, and the youngest son, Issac is the father of the Jewish
nation, and the forefather of Jesus Christ.‟
„Did you say Ibrahim ? I thought that Issac‟s father was Abraham,‟ I
interrupted the Imam‟s flow.
„Ibrahim is the correct pronunciation of Abraham,‟ said the Imam
looking directly into my eyes, „as I was saying,‟ he continued, „you see
Christianity and Judaism and Islam are the same. In the Holy Qur‟an, in
Surah number 2, verse 62 it is written:
‗Those who believe in the Qur‘an,
And those who follow the Jewish scriptures,
And the Christians and the Sabians
Any who believe in Allah
And the Last Day,
337
 SECOND CHANCE

And work righteousness,

Shall have their reward
With their Lord; on them
Shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve.‘
They are the same, there is only one God and that is Allah. It is for
Christians, Jews and everyone. The Holy Qur‟an is saying that it is the
same, God the creator, is Allah. What has happened is that Holy Bible
has been corrupted. This whole notion that Jesus Christ is the only way
and that he is the begotten son of God is simply not true. It is this belief
that is causing all the violence in the world today. Recall, all of the
millions of people that were massacred in the crusades, because of this
belief. Allah saw that his Holy word had been distorted and corrupted by
Christians and Jews, in the Bible, so he had to give mankind the truth. He
chose the great prophet Mohammed to receive this truth,‟ the Imam
stopped and smiled.
I wondered whether this could be the reason for the confusion that I
was having over the exclusivity of the message of Christ. Could the Bible
be completely corrupted, as was stated by the Imam.
„So does the Qur‟an mention Jesus?‟ I asked.
„Yes it does mention Jesus, and only in the Holy Qur‟an do we have the
real truth about Jesus. There are three things, the first is that Jesus is the
son of Mary and that he was a great prophet, who performed many
miracles, in Surah 5, verse 110:
Then will Allah say: ‗O Jesus the son of Mary ! Recount my favour to thee and to
thy mother. Behold ! I strengthen thee with the holy spirit, so that thou didst speak
to the people in infancy and in maturity. Behold I taught thee the Book and
Wisdom, the Law and the Gospel. And behold ! Thou didst make out of clay, the
figure of a bird, by My leave, and thou didst breathe into it, and it becometh a bird
by My leave. And thou didst heal those; born blind, and the lepers by My leave.
And behold ! Thou didst bring forth the dead by My leave. And behold ! I did
restrain the Children of Israel from violence to thee when thou didst show them the
Clear Signs, and the unbelievers among them said ‗This is nothing but evident
magic.‘
The second point is that Jesus is not god, he is not Allah, as is clearly
stated in Surah 5, verse 17:
In blasphemy indeed are those that say that Allah is Christ, the son of Mary. Say:
‗Who the hath the least power against Allah, if His will were to destroy Christ the
son of Mary, his mother, and all – everyone that is on the earth ? For to Allah
belongeth the dominion of the heavens and the earth, and all that is between. He
created what He pleaseth. For Allah hath power over all things.

338
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

The third point, is that Jesus Christ did not die on the cross, he was
taken away by Allah before he died, again this is very clear in Surah 4,
verse 157:
That they said in boast, ―We killed Christ Jesus the son of Mary, the Messenger
of Allah‖ But they killed him not, nor crucified him, but so it was made to appear
to them, and those who differ therein are full of doubts, with no certain knowledge,
but only conjecture to follow, for a surety they killed him not.
The Holy Qur‟an has revealed us the truth about Jesus Christ.‟ The
Imam paused and smiled, once again.
„Are you telling me that Jesus was simply an ordinary man, born to
Mary, that he was not the son of God, nor was he God, nor was he
crucified. That Jesus did not die for us. That is just a man made myth?‟ I
asked the Imam.
„Jesus was a man, he was not ordinary, as he was a Messenger of Allah,
a great prophet. But the Holy Qur‟an says that he was not Allah, and that
he was not crucified. All of that is a corruption of the truth,‟ replied the
Imam.
It seemed like déjà vu, just like when I was listening to Professor
Chandra‟s radically different views on Hindu scripture. The Imam was
saying that the Holy Qur‟an was the truth and that the Holy Bible was
not true. I had found it difficult to follow all of Roshan‟s explanation
about God coming on earth as Jesus Christ and dying for me, and all of
that stuff about the blood of Jesus did seem very strange. What the Imam
was saying seemed more reasonable.
„I have told you about the foundations of Islam. Now I will tell you
about the five pillars of Islam, these are the five things that you have to
do, and then you will go to heaven on the day of judgement. The first
pillar is Iman, not Imam but Iman. That is to have faith that there is only
one god, Allah, and that his true prophet is Mohammed.
The second pillar is Salah, which is prayer. You have to pray five times a
day. The times are set every day, according to sunrise and sunset. There is
a specific prayer that has to be said at the different times.
The third pillar is Hajj, this is pilgrimage. Once in your lifetime you
have to perform a pilgrimage, ideally to the Al Ka‟bah which is in Mecca,
which is the most sacred place. The other two most sacred places are Al
Masjid Al Nabawi in Medina, the birth place of our prophet Mohammed,
and the other is the Qubbat as Sakhrah, which is the golden dome
mosque on the rock in Jerusalem; that is the place that our prophet
Mohammed saw himself ascend to heaven. If you are too poor to travel
to these places, then there are alternative places in your home country
that you can go to for pilgrimage.
The fourth pillar is Sawm, which is fasting. This occurs in the month of
Ramadan, during that month you are not meant to eat or drink between
339
 SECOND CHANCE

sunrise and sunset; you can only eat and drink after sunset. This is to
enforce discipline. During the thirty days of Ramadan the Holy Qur‟an is
read from start to finish, in thirty parts, in the Mosque.
The fifth pillar is Zakat, which is to give 10% of your income to the
poor in alms.
In summary it is faith that Allah is god and Mohammed is his prophet,
pray five times a day, once in your life time do pilgrimage to a holy place,
fast during the day in the month of Ramadan, and give 10% of your
income to the poor. If you do all of these, then you will be righteous in
the eyes of the almighty Allah and you will go to heaven. You have to
submit yourself to do these things,‟ the Imam finished speaking.
I looked at the Imam expecting him to go on. The Imam sat there,
smiling back at me.
„Is that all there is to Islam? If I do these five things, then I will be
righteous in the eyes of Allah and I will go to heaven. It seems very
straight forward and very reasonable, a bit too easy,‟ I replied.
„Yes if you follow the five pillars of Islam, you will be judged by Allah
and will go to heaven. It is about submission to Allah. You must have
faith that Allah is god, and that Holy Qur‟an is his true revelation, that by
doing these things you will go to heaven. Allah is a merciful god. He has
made it so that any man can go to heaven. All these things that Allah has
shown us, any man can do, he is merciful and does not want to make it
difficult or impossible for us to go to heaven. What kind of god would
make things complicated and so difficult?‟
I didn‟t reply. What the Imam was saying was logical. All these things
about Shaktipat, the blood of Jesus, the Holy Spirit, karmic law, yoga,
meditation, it was all so utterly complicated; difficult to understand,
accept and follow. Could the Imam be right that god never wanted to
make it so complicated for us? Was this the whole point, that it really was
very straight forward. Islam seemed logical and reasonable, it was not
difficult to implement, I could see its appeal. But then I remembered
Osama bin Laden, the chilling video that had been released talking about
Jihad, a Holy war.
„So what is Jihad ?‟ I asked Imam.
„That is a good question, Jihad is a spiritual struggle. It is a struggle that
we all go through in our inner being. We are all having jihad with sin in
us. I will explain sin to you, the „s‟ in sin is for selfishness, the „i‟ in sin is
for ignorance and the „n‟ in sin is for negligence. It is these things that we
strive against. This is the jihad that we are facing. The ignorance that the
truth is in the Holy Qur‟an. This is explained in Surah 25, verse 52:
‗Therefore listen not to the Unbelievers, but strive, jihad, against them with the
utmost strenuousness, with the Qur‘an.‘

340
 THE IMAM OF HYDERABAD

„You said jihad with strenuousness. If someone does not agree with you
what does the Holy Qur‟an say that you should do?‟ I asked.
„The prophet Mohammed said that if you see a fellow brother doing
something that he should not be doing, then you should physically
restrain them. This is the highest and most noble form of intervention, it
shows that you have the faith and conviction in what you believe is right.
It is the highest expression of faith that you have acted physically, on the
basis of that conviction. The second, slightly lesser form of intervention
is to tell your brother to stop doing what they are doing. The third, which
is considered the weakest, and exhibiting the weakest level of faith is to
intervene by praying,‟ replied the Imam.
„Where is this written ?‟ I asked.
„It is in the Haddith,‟ replied the Imam.
„What is the Haddith ?‟
„The Haddith is an explanatory text of the Holy Qur‟an, it has the
further sayings of the prophet Mohammed.‟ I noticed that the Imam had
stopped smiling.
I was about to ask another question, when a young man came up to us
and said:
„Uncle, come let us go.‟
The Imam turned to me and said, „Our time is up, Inshallah, here is my
card, please do call me when you get back to England. We can carry on
our conversation there. Enjoy you conference.‟ With that he shook my
hand and walked away.
I wanted to ask him more about the Haddiths, but we had run out of
time. Just then the receptionist came and told me that my room was
ready.

341
SECOND CHANCE

342
 23 SHATTERED VISAGE

I went up to the room, showered and got changed. The Imam had
certainly given me another perspective, was the Holy Bible complete lies
and the true revelation really in the Holy Qur‟an? The Imam and Roshan
were definitely saying very different things, the conclusions were radically
different. Which was true? They both could not be true, but they could
both be lies and incorrect. I really wondered whether any of the Holy
scriptures (Holy Bible, Holy Qur‟an, Vedas, Gita, Buddha‟s sayings) were
really a divine revelation, or whether they were simply the machinations
of man, clever storytelling, group think, and cultic mind control. What
was the truth?
I went down to the reception and asked what I ought to do and see in
Hyderabad.
„Sir you must visit the Salar Jung Museum. It has the finest collection of
pieces that can be found in India. It was put together by the Sir Yusuf Ali
Salar Jung III, who was the Wasir, the Prime Minister, to the Nizam of
Hyderabad between 1899 and 1949. You will enjoy it very much. Shall I
arrange for a car to take you there?‟
It seemed like a good idea. A car was arranged and I was on the way to
the museum. It was a dull semi-circular building, a little bit confusing to
navigate. It was divided into 33 different rooms. The receptionist at the
hotel had been too generous in his assessment of the museum, an
interesting but not an exceptional collection. I wondered from room to
room, getting a little bored. Then I went into room 28. Every single hair
on the back of my spine stood up end to end.
I was staring at a statue that I had seen in my dream over two years ago.
It was a statue in marble of beautiful young girl, wearing a veil over her
face. It was exactly how I had dreamt it, down to the size and the look on
the face. In the dream, it was I who had sculpted the statue, a master
343
 SECOND CHANCE

piece for the Nizam of Hyderabad. It was all coming back to me. I went
to have a look at the statue. There was a dusty brass plaque at the foot of
the statue. My heart was thumping hard, I had dreamt that I had been a
sculptor in the late 1880s in Hyderabad, would the dates match up. Could
it be that re-incarnation really was true, that this was my proof?
I knelt down to read the brass inscription. „Veiled Rebecca, sculpted in
Italy by an unknown sculptor, bought by Yusuf Ali Salar Jung III in
1934.‟ I couldn‟t believe it, it was an Italian sculpture, it wasn‟t Indian and
it wasn‟t sculpted in 1880s. But it was in Hyderabad, and I had seen it in
my dreams. How could I have imagined something so vividly? I walked
straight out of the museum, and back to the hotel. It was not what I had
expected. It would have been better if there had been no statue at all. I
was beginning to lose all hope in getting any answers to my questions.
Could I trust my reasoning? It seemed that my mind and imagination had
been playing tricks on me. I couldn‟t explain how I had seen the statue in
my dreams.
Samson arrived early the next morning. We had breakfast together and
set off for the conference. I didn‟t say or speak much to Samson.
Thoughts about the conversation with the Imam, the statue of the veiled
Rebecca, and all the other things that had happened to me, were like
debris caught up in a tornado swirling about in my head. All was
confusion and chaos.
We arrived at the conference hall, it was on the outskirts of Hyderabad,
about a thousand people had turned up. In addition to Ravi Zacharias
there were other speakers. Samson kept on assuring me that at the end of
the conference I would have greater clarity. We went into the main
conference room early to get a good seat. The auditorium soon filled up,
every seat was taken. A bell rang and there was a hush. A silver haired
man, with a dark complexion, dressed smartly in a blue suit, came
bounding in from the back of the auditorium. He was holding a small
folder and he was smiling, he had a relaxed and confident manner about
him, it was Ravi Zacharias. There was a small round of applause. Then
everyone sat down.
Ravi was a very eloquent and precise speaker. He talked with us many
times over those few days, each time for about an hour. It was an hour
packed with content, with many anecdotes and quotations from some of
the greatest thinkers of yesteryear. It was a style that I liked. I had found
Roshan‟s sermons a little dull, there was only one point that he was
making, and not a complex point at that, but he would talk about that
point for over an hour and a half. I found that style intensely mind
numbing. Why take 90 minutes to say something that should take 5
minutes. Ravi Zacharias‟ talks had substance. There was a tremendous
clarity in his thought process.

344
 SHATTERED VISAGE

Ravi started by quoting the lyrics from a song in the sixties: ‗From the
canyons of the mind we wander…who will answer, who will answer, who will answer‘.
Earlier on I had felt just like that. I was wandering in a deep canyon,
looking for a way out, but there was no guide, no map, just more gullies
and dead ends, that are keeping me in this canyon of uncertainty and
darkness. It then struck me that the song writer may have felt something
similar, and the fact that it was popular, indicated that others felt the
same way that I felt. I was not alone, wandering in this canyon of
darkness. But how do I get out Ravi? That was the question that I had on
my mind.
As if to answer me he said:
‗You better be sure that what you believe is true. You have every right to believe
anything that you want, but not everything that we believe is right. The onus is on
each of us to verify that what we believe is logically consistent and is supported by
evidence. I am reminded of an amusing story of a guy who believed that he was
dead. He kept on telling his wife that he was dead, and his wife kept on telling
him that he could not be dead and was alive. Finally, his wife decided to take her,
nutsy husband, to the medical experts. The medical experts explained and
convinced the husband that only people who are living bleed. The doctors showed
him all the medical evidence to support this fact that only living people bleed and
that dead people do not bleed. The experts went through hours and hours of
presentations and medical evidence. At the end of the presentation, the husband
agreed with the doctors that only people who are alive bleed, and that dead people
do not bleed. After this point had been established and agreed on, one of the doctors
took a pin and stuck it in a vein in the husband‘s arm, blood squirted out. The
doctors and the wife stood their triumphantly, believing that now the husband
would stop believing that he was dead. Instead, the husband turned around to the
doctors and said:
‗Great Scott I guess that dead people bleed to‘.‘
Everyone in the audience, myself included, started laughing. It was a
ridiculous story. But, I began to think, am I like that nutsy husband?
Are all the facts and the evidence there, but I am refusing to believe it?
Am I just like this man, willing and able to distort the incontrovertible
evidence around me, just to support what I already believe? Am I just
like this man, who says that he wants to see the evidence, so that he can
make a reasonable deduction based on facts and logic, yet when the
facts and logic prove that he is wrong, he simply invents another theory
or denies what he has been told. Ravi Zacharias went on:
―I was asked a question in a lecture that I gave at Harvard University, one of the
students asked, ‗Isn‘t it rather unrealistic and self centred for God to condemn a
bunch of atheists who don‘t believe in Him when He hasn‘t given them a
convincing reason to?‘
345
 SECOND CHANCE

The scriptures teach that the problem with human unbelief is not the absence of
evidence rather it is the suppression of it. ‗Nothing good can come,‘ said Professor
Richard, in his book ‗Ideas have Consequences‘, ―if the will is wrong. If the
disposition is wrong, reason increase malefience.‖ George MacDonald rightly
argued that ―to explain truth to him who loves it not, is to give him more
plentiful material for misinterpretation.
I summarize, my response to that question:
1. To justify the question, God must remain in the paradigm; the question starts
off with an assumption that there is a God, without God this question self-
destructs and is a meaningless question. This in itself should have persuaded
the person that his question can only have meaning if there is a God, so he
has proved the existence of God by asking this question. We shall put this
point to one side, and continue on.
2. God has created us in His image. Part of that image is the privilege of self-
determination.
3. The greatest of all virtues is love.
4. God in, His love, had created us, and in response, love from us has to be a
choice that we are free to make. Where there is no choice, it is coercion, which
means it is not love. In the Christian message alone, love precedes life; in every
other world view, life preceded love. Therefore, in the Christian framework,
love has a point of reference, God himself.
5. God communicates to mankind, in a variety of ways:
i)Reason (philosophical)
ii)Experience (existential)
iii)History (empirical)
iv)Emotions (relational)
v)The Scripture (propositional), and
vi)Incarnation (personal)
Take these six areas that are open to serious critical thinking, and you will find
that the problem is not the absence of evidence; rather it is the suppression of it. It
was in this very school, Harvard, which Simon Greenleaf, professor of
jurisprudence, said of the documents of the New Testament, ―You may choose to
say I do not believe it all, but you may not say there is not enough evidence.‖
We have stopped believing the truth that has been given to us in the bible, and
instead we have become like the husband who believed he was dead, contrary to the
evidence. It was GK Chesterton who said ‗When people stop believing in one thing
the problem is not that they believe in nothing but they start believing in anything‘.
We have created and are living in a society that is lost and is in despair. I read this
short piece, by an unknown author, that sums up what has happened to the
children growing up in this century:
346
 SHATTERED VISAGE

‗In the 1950s kids lost their innocence – liberated from their parents by well paid
jobs and music - created the generation gap‘
In the 1960s kids lost their authority – decade of protest against parents, church
and state– they were rejected and nothing replaced it they are alienated
In the 1970s kids lost their love – decade of me'ism a decade of hyphenated words
beginning with self, self image, self esteem … it had made for a lonely world they
know everything about sex but nothing about love they no longer know the
difference between sex and love – they are now alone
In the 1980s kids lost their hope – stripped of the above and plagued by the
horrible spectre of a nuclear war they do not believe that there is a future‘
On the day before Elvis Presley, a man who was adulated by millions, a man who
had conquered the hearts of thousands of teenage girls, was asked how he felt – to
which he replied ‗I feel alone‘. How can this be, how can a man loved by so many,
feel so alone. You see, the loneliest moment in life is when you have just experienced
that what you thought would be the ultimate pleasure and it has let you down.
Elvis Presley was devoid of any meaningful personal relationship; none of money,
fans, fame, possessions could make up for the lack of a personal relationship.
The reason why we have got ourselves into this mess is because of the thinking and
influence of the European existential philosophers, Nietzsche and Jean Paul Sartre
in particular. Both of them advocated, that there is no need for God any more, we
have the intelligence, the science and the sophistication to be free to think what we
like, and do what we like. I believe very strongly that it was the ‗Superman‘ ideas
of Nietzsche which was the seed that led to Hitler‘s book ‗Mein Kempf‘, which
laid the ideological foundations for the Holocaust, the extermination of over 6
million Jews, gypsies, disabled, elderly and the mentally handicapped. There is a
plaque in Auschwitz, the largest of all death camps, written by Hitler: ‗I freed
Germany from the stupid and degrading fallacies of conscience and morality … we
will train young people before whom the world will tremble. I want young people
capable of violence – imperious, relentless and cruel.‘
Paul Johnson an imminent historian said this of John Paul Sartre, guru of the
sixties, who fanned the flames of existentialism:
‗What he did not foresee, and what a wiser man would have foreseen, was that
most of the violence to which he gave philosophical encouragement would be inflicted
by blacks not on whites, but on other blacks. By helping Fanon to inflame Africa,
he contributed to the civil wars and mass murders that have engulfed most of that
continent from the mid-sixties onwards to this day. His influence in the Southeast
Asia, where the Vietnam War was drawing to a close, was even more baneful.
The hideous crimes committed in Cambodia from April 1975 onwards, which
involved the deaths of between a fifth and a third of the population, were organised
by a group of Francophone middle-class intellectuals known as the Angka Leu
(The Higher Organisation). Of its eight leaders, five were teachers, one a university
347
 SECOND CHANCE

professor, one a civil servant, and one an economist. All had studied in France in
the 1950‘s where they had not only belonged to the Communist Party, but had
absorbed Sartre‘s doctrines of philosophical activism and ―necessary violence‖.
These mass murderers were his ideological children.‘
You see, my dear friends, it is the logical outworking of the enlightened thinking of
intellectuals, that has directly resulted in the 20th Century being the bloodiest
century in the history of mankind. It was Malcolm Muggeridge who said ‗We have
educated ourselves into imbecility.‘ I want you all to make sure that you
understand what I am saying. Not all atheists are immoral and mass murderers,
but morality as goodness cannot be justified with atheistic presuppositions. An
atheist may be morally minded, but he just happens to be living better than his
belief about the nature of man warrants. He may have personal moral values, but
he cannot have any sense of compelling and universal moral obligation. Moral duty
cannot logically operate without a moral law; and there is no moral law in an
amoral world.
If you take the philosophical assumptions, of the existential atheistic philosophers,
and take those assumptions to their logical conclusions, then the result is that, you
or I can be justified in raping, pillaging, conducting genocide, doing anything that
we like, because you can take the position of God, and there is no absolute moral
law to stop you, or tell you that you are doing something wrong.
You could argue that atheism is not the only philosophy that as resulted in war;
that many have been killed in the crusades, and in the inquisitions, as a result of
Christianity. But this occurred because of an illogical outworking of the basic
philosophical assumptions; Jesus Christ taught us to love our enemies, not to
exterminate them. By contrast, the demagogues of the Nietzschean and Sartrean
stripe were operating in total harmony with, and in some cases the direct injunction
of, the ideology behind their actions.
One historian has said that while Hitler seduced Germany, Stalin raped Russia –
both propelled by an atheistic world view. Relativized morality, when it has had its
day, will have trivialised man, and made him an expendable statistic in fulfilling
the ideological plan of some superman. If one thinks we are too far afield from
atheism in our argument, let me remind him that it was Nietzsche who said that
because God had died in the nineteenth century, the twentieth century would
become the bloodiest century in history. Disregard for the sanctity of life, and its
resultant corollary of estimating the value of a life by its quality, provided some of
the Third Reich‘s metaphysical moorings.
Ironically, at the Nuremberg trials, when the judges on trial were being defended,
one of the strongest arguments was that they were operating according to the law of
their own land. To that a legitimate counter-question was raised, „But is there
not a law above our laws ?‟.

348
 SHATTERED VISAGE

The Nietzchean answer would have to be ―No‖. Human reason alone, unfounded
on a divine first cause, makes survival the only ethic, but it never answers when,
why or who.
How can all of this have happened ? Paul Johnson in his book ‗The flight of
Reason‘, gives an answer:
‗One of the principal lessons of our tragic century, which has seen so many millions
of innocent lives sacrificed in schemes to improve the lot of humanity, is – beware of
intellectuals… For intellectuals, far from being highly individualistic and non-
conformist people, fellow certain regular patterns of behaviour. Taken as a group,
they are often ultra-conformist within the circles formed by those whose approval
they seek and value… (enabling) them to create climates of opinion and prevailing
orthodoxies, which themselves often generate irrational and destructive courses of
action. Above all, we must at all times remember what intellectuals habitually
forget: that people matter more than concepts and must come first. The worst of
despotisms is the heartless tyranny of ideas.‘
If only people knew where, a lot of, what they believe came from, and who it was
that first said it. Men like Bertrand Russell and Jean Paul Sartre have had a
profound impact on society, having both argued against the existence of God and
mocked His injunctions. One would think that such intellectual giants would come
up with a compelling argument for their own moral philosophy. Yet it has not been
forthcoming.
In his famous debate in 1948 with the philosopher Frederick Copleston, Bertrand
Russell revealed his Achilles heel on morality. At the midpoint of the debate,
Copleston asked Russell on what basis he differentiated between right and wrong,
and Russell answered the same basis that he differentiated between yellow and blue.
Copleston challenged the analogy because colours, he said, were differentiated on the
basis of seeing. How does one differentiate between good and bad ? And Russell
replied that he did so, on the basis of his feelings.
Copleston was very gracious, for had he wanted to draw philosophical blood, he
could have decimated Russell‘s argument. In some cultures they love their
neighbours, in others they eat them, both on the basis of feeling. Would Russell
have a preference ?
I want you to understand this point. I will illustrate with another story. The other
day I was flying over South East Asia and happened to be sitting next to a lady
from the Netherlands. I asked what she did, and she told me that she rescued
children from abuse. I asked her whether she had been successful. She looked at
me, tears welling in her eyes, and said ‗Mr Ravi, I have been doing this work for
over ten years, and I have seen some dreadful things. Last night I saw something
that was so unimaginable, so abhorrent and disgusting. I went to a part of town
called ‗Snake Alley‘, there business men drink a concoction of hard liquor and
snake blood, and it drives them into a frenzy. I stopped a man last night, who had
349
 SECOND CHANCE

drunk this evil mixture, who was about to carry out his sexual cravings on an
eighteen month old baby girl.
Richard Hawkins, the Cambridge professor in biology, in his latest book says that
‗There is no right or wrong, we are all dancing to our DNA.‘ Would he still
be saying that, this crazed businessman was simply dancing to his DNA, and
there was nothing wrong with it, if it was his baby daughter that this man was
about to violate? Or in Russell‘s philosophy this businessman‘s behaviour is
justified, as he is simply carrying out his preference. Let us not allow ourselves
to be deluded by clever ‗sound bites‘; there is absolute good and evil.‘
This last argument shook me up. I remembered sitting at „The Red
Dragon‟ pub lost in my erotic fantasies of the brunette that was sitting
next to me. My time in Rio. I had been dancing to my DNA, without any
thought for the girls, for their feelings and needs as fellow human beings.
I was only interested in how I could use their bodies for my pleasure,
over and over again. I had felt ashamed and guilty at first. Could it be
because I was aware that there was a higher moral law? A law which I was
breaking. It was Rupert that told me it was okay to think and do what I
liked, a normal male response is how he described it. He had said it was
okay for me to „dance to my DNA‟, it had sounded great at the time, but
inside I knew that it was a LIE. A convenient lie. Now I was sitting in a
lecture theatre, understanding for the first time, that I was aware of a
higher moral law. I knew that I was guilty of breaking it. That is why I
had felt so miserable and sick inside. I wondered, whether every person
that has ever lived, also had these moral laws imprinted inside of them.
I was angry at Rupert. I was angry at Richard Hawkins. These men were
influencing countless men and women, giving them a justification for
doing things that were basically wrong; things that could be destroying
the moral fabric of our society. These thoughts flashed through my head.
Ravi continued:
‗Recently 9 /11, the attacks on the World Trade Centre, were viewed by one
group of people as utterly bad, and by another group of people as a good thing.
Which is the right view? Without an absolute moral law we, all of humanity is
lost.
So why are there so many people professing to be atheists. It is not because of
superior intellectual reasoning, nor is it because it results in a better society. I have
come across very few atheists who are intellectually honest about why they have faith
in what they believe. One those very few is Aldous Huxley, author of a ‗Brave
New World‘, in his writings we find the real agenda and ―reason‖ that lurks
behind the outwardly academic assault. He writes in his book ‗Ends and Means‘:
‗For Me, as, no doubt, for most of my contemporaries, the philosophy of
meaninglessness was essentially and instrument of liberation. The liberation we
desired was simultaneously liberation from a certain political and economic system
350
 SHATTERED VISAGE

and liberation from a certain system of morality. We objected to the morality

because it interfered with our sexual freedom; we objected to the political and
economic system because it was unjust. The supporters of these systems claimed that
in some way they embodied the meaning (a Christian meaning, they insisted) of the
world. There was one admirably simple method of confuting these people and at
the same time justifying ourselves in our political and erotic revolt: We could deny
that the world had any meaning whatsoever….
.. I had motives for not wanting the world to have a meaning; consequently I
assumed that it had none, and was able without any difficulty to find satisfying
reasons for this assumption. Most ignorance is vincible ignorance. We don‘t know
because we don‘t want to know. It is our will that decides how and upon what
subjects we shall use our intelligence. Those who detect no meaning in the world
generally do so because, for one reason or another, it suits their books that the
world should be meaningless.‘
So there we have it. He is an atheist, simply because he would like to
practice his sexual preferences, behave any which way he likes
in business, and not feel guilty or ashamed about his behaviour.
There is nothing intellectually superior in all of this, it is an
elaborate façade of words to support their destructive lifestyles,
and encourage others to do the same.”
This was it, this was the very thought that gone through my head
moments earlier. Aldous Huxley was honest enough to state, that he
chose to believe what he believed, simply because it allowed him to do
whatever he wanted. I had done the same. I wanted to believe that Rupert
was right, only because I wanted to indulge in my erotic fantasies, and not
feel guilty about it. I had deluded myself. I wondered what other things I
believed in, simply for convenience sake, to justify my behaviour,
irrespective of whether I really felt that it was right or wrong. What a
thought !
I also remembered the conversation with Roshan in Ahmedabad at the
McDonald‟s. He was talking about sin and being a sinner. At the time I
thought that he was talking nonsense. It was only now that I was
beginning to understand what he was telling me. If there was an absolute
moral law, one that had been set my God, then I would have to agree
with Roshan, I had fallen short of the law. I had sinned, and I was a
sinner. This was a frightening thought if Jesus was correct about what
happens to sinners. I didn‟t want Hell to exist.
Ravi continued:
Stephen Jay Gould, another Cambridge professor, writes:
‗We are here because one odd group of fishes had a peculiar fin anatomy that could
transform into legs for terrestrial creatures; because comets struck the earth and
wiped out dinosaurs, thereby giving mammals a chance not otherwise available (so
351
 SECOND CHANCE

thank your lucky stars in a literal sense); because the earth never froze entirely
during an ice age; because a small and tenuous species, arising in Africa a quarter
of a million years ago, has managed, so far, to survive by hook and by crook. We
may yearn for a ―higher‖ answer- but none exists. This explanation, though
superficially troubling, if not terrifying, is ultimately liberating and exhilarating.‘
There is a terrible irony in all of this, isn‘t there ? What is the exhilaration and
liberation that he is talking about ? Is this liberation synonymous with the fact
that we have become one of the most violent and drugged nations on the earth ? Is
this the exhilaration that makes sedatives and antacids the most highly sold drugs
over pharmaceutical counters, to slow us down from our mad rush for ever-
increasing wealth ? Is this the exhilaration that is sending our songwriters into a
frenzy on the stage and into a stupor in their homes? Is this the exhilaration that
has fragmented our families and often victimised the weakest in our midst ? Is all
this reason for exhilaration ? Or are we playing deadly word games once again?‖
Ravi Zacharias, stopped to drink a glass of water.
‗I trust that I have sufficiently illustrated that an atheistic world view is untenable.
There has to be an absolute moral law, and that God is the absolute moral law
giver. Besides we are asked to believe Professor Stephen Jay Gould that life itself is
a random process. Not all scientists agree with this proposition. For example, Fred
Hoyle has argued that the idea that life originate by the random shuffling of
molecules is ‗as ridiculous and improbable as the proposition that a tornado
blowing through a junkyard may assemble a fully functioning Boeing 747.‘ He
calculated that the likelihood of life beginning in such a way is one in ten to the
power of forty thousand (1 in 1040,000 ) - the chance that two thousand enzyme
molecules will be formed simultaneously from their twenty component amino acids
on a single specified occasion.
And just so that you may have little doubt, that creation itself is a reasonable proof
of God‘s existence, then let me transport you to a sophisticated lecture hall in
Cambridge University where I sat listening to a lecture on quantum physicist Dr
John Polkinghorne, President of Queens College, Cambridge. His book The
Quantum World has been hailed by Physics Bulletin as one of the finest in its
genre. In his book, One World, Polkinghorne eloquently argued that the existence
of God is intimated by our finely tuned and intelligible universe, with exactitude
demanded in every detail that anti-theistic thinkers are hard pressed to explain:
‗In the early expansion of the universe there has to be a close balance between the
expansive energy (driving things apart) and the force of gravity (pulling things
together). If expansion dominated then matter would fly apart too rapidly for
condensation into galaxies and stars to take place. Nothing interesting could
happen in so thinly spread a world. On the other hand, if gravity dominated, the
world would collapse in on itself again before there was time for the processes of life
to get going. For us to be possible requires a balance between the effects of
expansion and contraction which at a very early epoch in the universe‘s history (the
352
 SHATTERED VISAGE

Planck time) has to differ from equality by not more than 1 in 1060. The numerate
will marvel at such a degree of accuracy. For the non-numerate I will borrow an
illustration from Paul Davies of what that accuracy means. He points out that it
is the same as aiming at a target an inch wide on the other side of the observable
universe, twenty thousand million light years away, and hitting the mark ! [Only
God can be that accurate]‘
I have two more concluding remarks. The first is that a pure atheistic position is
not logically tenable, as it is logically self contradictory. An atheist is someone who
categorically does not believe in God, an atheist is affirming a negative. It is like
saying, there are no black stones with white spots anywhere in the universe. For
this statement to be true you will need to have infinite and complete knowledge of
all the stones in the universe.
A pure atheistic view point, is an arrogant view of the universe, that they know it
all and that there is no God. It is impossible to know it all, and thus one can
never say that they are an atheist. Bertrand Russell, quite late in his career,
realised that this was the case and changed his point of view from being an atheist
to being an agnostic. This is a logically acceptable world view, where the person
concludes that they have insufficient evidence to know what is right, if that is what
they truly believe. People like Bertrand Russell were hiding behind the label of
being an agnostic, as they knew that their hard atheistic view point was not logical.
An alternative world view which is also logical is the non-theist view, which is what
Buddha advocated. That there is no personal God, like Jesus Christ, and that the
nature of the Creator is something that is unknowable.
There are many arguments that atheists frequently give for their ‗proof‘ that God
does not exist, these are invariably logically flawed. For example, take an often
used argument that is assumed to be a proof against the existence of God.
1. There is evil in the world
2. If there were a God He would have done something about it
3. Nothing has been done about it
4. Therefore, there is no God
The third premise is not self-evident. It is susceptible to strong counter-arguments
because it is a deduction in itself and in need of inductive support. It can be shown
to fail the test of truthfulness and validity because it reveals the presuppositions of
an individual. It says nothing about whether God exists or not, but only that if He
did, He would do things ―my way‖.
Despite the weakness of the third premise, this type of argument from atheists
presents a logical dilemma for theists. Responding to this, theists may take several
approaches as a starting point. Their goal will be to first defang the question and
then present stronger arguments for God‘s existence.

353
 SECOND CHANCE

The issue of evil is, of course, one of the greatest debating points between theism and
atheism. Let me give just two meaningful approaches theists may use as starting
points:
Approach 1
1. Yes there is evil in this world
2. If there is evil, there must be good (a problem the atheist has to explain)
3. If there is good and evil, there must be a moral law on which to judge
between good and evil
4. If there is a moral law, there must be a moral law giver
5. For the theist, this points to God.
Approach 2
1. There is evil in the world
2. There is nothing inconsistent about evil and the freedom of the will within
the framework of a loving creator
3. In fact, concepts of love and goodness are unexplainable unless there is a
God
4. Since man does experience love and goodness, it argues for the reality of
God
5. Therefore, it is not unreasonable to believe that He exists.
Finally, if the world view of atheism is not the answer, then what is ? The answer
lies in a man, born in an obscure village, brought up in another obscure village,
lived life as an impoverished carpenter, at age 30 started life as an itinerant
preacher, never owned anything, never held a post, never went more than 200 miles
from his place of birth, after 3 years public opinion turned against him, an
innocent tried and found guilty to be crucified at age 33.
James Stewart wrote: ―He was the meekest and lowliest of all the sons of men, yet
he spoke about coming on the clouds of heaven with the glory of God. He was so
austere that evil spirits and demons cried out in terror of his presence and name.
Yet he was so genial winsome and approachable that the children loved to play in
his lap and the little ones nestled in his arms. His presence had the innocent gaiety
of a village wedding that would like the presence of sunshine. No one was half as
kind to the poor and sinners, yet no one has spoken such scorching words against
others as they have against him. His whole life was love, yet on one occasion he
chastised the Pharisees for how they could escape the damnation of hell.‖
It is incredible to believe, but it was G K Chesterton who wrote: ‗Truth, of course,
must be stranger than fiction, for we have made fiction to suit ourselves.‘
It is only by having a personal relationship with God, in the form of Jesus Christ,
that man can achieve fulfilment. I will talk more about that tomorrow, and about
other world views. Thank you and good afternoon.‘

354
 SHATTERED VISAGE

There was a thundering round of applause, many people were standing

up and clapping furiously. I was glad that this lecture was coming to an
end. There was so much to take in. His last quote from GK Chesterton
was playing on my mind. The previous day the simplicity of Islam had
struck me as being a compelling logic that it was from God. But belief in
the statement „Truth, of course, must be stranger than fiction, for we have made
fiction to suit ourselves‘ would lead to me a radically different conclusion.
The fact that Islam was so easy to understand, would imply that it was
most probably written by man, and was not a divine revelation. It was in
many ways, the logic that Professor Chandra was using implicitly, when
he was telling me that the reason the Ramayana and the Bhagavad Gita
are so appealing and so easily believable by man, is because they have
been written by man. The Vedas on the other hand are more likely to be
divinely inspired, based on the fact that they are so difficult to
understand. Similarly, all of the illogical nature of God coming on earth
simply to die; made it more plausible that it was God‟s work and not
man‟s imagination. Simply, because only God could come up with
something that was beyond man‟s imagination. Could this really be true?
Was my logic sound? If so I had my answer. But was my logic sound?
Samson and I went straight back to the hotel. As we were going back
Samson asked:
„So what do you think, Arjuna? Are you glad that you came?‟
„It was an exceptional talk. There was a lot of content. He has once and
for all shattered the, fragile, visage of atheism, for me.‟ I stopped for a
moment and thought about the last several years.
There was a time when I believed and advocated the things that that
Huxley and Sartre were promoting. I was like Huxley, I wanted to do
what I wanted to do and not feel guilty about it. Only if I had an
existential atheistic outlook, could I justify, cheating on Rita, sleeping
with prostitutes and taking drugs. I didn‟t want anyone to tell me what to
do. I was rebelling against the system. A system which I felt had made me
miserable. I hadn‟t realised that if I was left to my own devices I would be
even more miserable. Samson was looking at me.
„Sorry, I was lost in thought. Yes it was a good lecture. But, Ravi was
already preaching to the converted. I already believe that there is a God
up there. I guess I now have more arguments to support that view point.
But what I really want to know is, who is God? How do I make contact
with him? Is it by following Islam, Hinduism or Christianity? These are
the question that I want answering. Today didn‟t really help on that
front,‟ I replied.
„I thought that you might say that. I bought two books by Ravi
Zacharias that I believe will help you with just that question. In this book,
„Shattered Visage‟, you should read appendix 2, about the establishment
of a world view. In this other book, „Can Man Live without God‟, you
355
 SECOND CHANCE

should read the chapter on getting to the truth. It will help you prepare
for tomorrow‟s talk. You‟ll get much more out of it.‟
„Thanks Samson. I‟ll do that,‟ I replied, taking the books from, Samson.

356
 24 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLD
VIEW

I turned to the Appendix of „Shattered Visage‟ and began reading it:

‗In the case for Christian Theism, Arlie J Hoover listed a number of necessary
components for establishing a world view. I shall mention five of them, and then
add one more important aspect… Starting with self evident statements, both direct
and indirect, we proceed to the establishment of a truth centred world view. When
that is established, it must meet certain tests to distinguish knowledge from mere
opinion.‘
This is exactly what I was looking for. I wanted a framework to help me
work out the truth. I read on, eagerly.
(1) A good world view will have a strong foundation in correspondence; it will
have factual support. Conversely, it will refuse that which is known to be false. It
must harness all areas of reality and retain a selective sovereignty. To refuse to
include facts that challenge the thesis or to arbitrarily make some subservient to
others because they better fit a predetermined conclusion betrays a prejudice that
distorts the world view.
(2) A good world view should have a high degree of coherence or internal
consistency. A logically contradictory system cannot be true. To be internally
consistent it cannot have contradicting deductions, regardless of what ―experiential
needs‖ are met in the process.

357
 SECOND CHANCE

Let me illustrate these two characteristics of correspondence and coherence. Very

recently, I was able to witness a criminal trial involving child rape at the Old
Bailey in London. The atmosphere was tense, filled with all of the attendant
emotions – agony, anger and drama. It became clear that the attorneys were
seeking to do two things. First, they wanted to bring either certainty or doubt into
the allegations, depending on the client that they represented. Second, they wanted to
determine how the alleged facts all fit together. They explored issues such as time
and location by questioning witnesses, and with this wealth of information tried to
show either coherence or incoherence.
It was impossible to listen to these proceedings without realising that truth could
not stand on isolated statements: it had to fit the alleged story. Further, it was
impossible to escape the fact that whichever way the judgement went, it would
change the lives of the principals unalterably. Such a scenario, with all its
implications, must be enacted scores of times ever day in our world. The pursuit of
correspondence to fact and the coherence of the whole, even in specific beliefs, cannot
be expunged from the process of reaching accurate conclusions. This is true in court
trials and in every other aspect of life.
I stopped and re-read the sentence: „The pursuit of correspondence to fact and
the coherence of the whole, even in specific beliefs, cannot be expunged from the process
of reaching accurate conclusions.‘ I also remembered, from the Cultic Mind
Control book by Steven Hassan, that often the explanations given by
„gurus‟/ those that are spiritually enlightened may not be true, even
though it was by their instruction that you experienced something quite
unusual and pleasant. I thought back to how I had felt, and the logical
connections I had made when I was doing Reiki. Anand had told me to
chant something, and then predicted how I would feel, and then would
proceed to give me an explanation. I automatically assumed that given
that he had been accurate in predicting what I would experience, then I
should believe that his explanation was true, irrespective of how bizarre
or contradictory it may be.
Could this be the key to what had been puzzling me? I had experienced
something that I could not deny, yet the explanations for these
experiences were illogical. I had then started to wonder whether these
experiences were real or imagined. I had wanted to deny the experiences
because the explanation for the experiences were not highly coherent.
The explanation and logic given for my experiences corresponded to
what I felt, but was not coherent given all the other things I knew. If I
took the explanation that one guru gave in isolation to an explanation
given by another guru, or what was written in the Vedas, then I was okay.
But it had been impossible for me to fit all the things I knew into a
unified picture, no matter how hard I tried. Because when I took what a
particular guru said and tried to compare it with what was in the Vedas,
or what I knew about history, or with other gurus‟ teachings, all that I
358
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

got was incoherent inconsisteny. I had thought that I wasn‟t sufficiently

spiritual to understand what they were saying, and that was the reason
that I was confused. Now I realised that I was confused because what the
gurus were saying had no correspondence to the facts, and was
incoherent. Any intellectually honest individual would be confused. But I
had experienced something spiritual. The fact that the explanations were
incoherent for those spiritual experiences should not lead me to deny my
experiences. I would be guilty of throwing the baby out with the bath
water. It was the gurus‟ explanations and theology which were incorrect.
The experiences were real because they could independently verified by
third parties, they corresponded with reality. But I did not know the
source or the reason for these experiences. I began to realise it was my
world view that was faulty. My world view wasn‟t sufficiently coherent or
correspondent with reality to allow me to adequately and accurately
makes sense of my experiences.
I read on:
(3) A good world view has explanatory power. The collation of facts leads to
initial postulations, from whence we devise our theories, our hypotheses, and then
finally delineates our ‗laws‘. United facts and integrated deductions lead to systems.
Facts ultimately do not speak for themselves; they help build a theory or provide the
prescriptive elements, the eyeglasses, through which we view the world.
(4) A good world view will avoid two extremes. This means, said Hoover, that
a good world view will be neither too simple nor too complex. He uses the famous
―Occam‘s razor test‖. William of Occam (1300-1349) supposedly said, ―Do not
multiply entities without necessity‖, which basically means that we are to resist the
temptation to make our explanations too complex. If an explanation becomes too
complex, Occam‘s razor will cut it off. On the other hand, an explanation should
not become so simplistic that it commits the reductive fallacy. To make man an
incomprehensible entity is to go to one extreme. A good world view, therefore, is
neither too simple nor too complex in its explanatory power.
(5) A good world view has more than one line of evidence, not just one knock-
out argument. Cumulative evidence converges from several sources of data. Hoover‘s
illustration of the metaphysician being like a good stage manager is excellent. One
by one he clicks on a series of lights, placed at different angles around the stage.
The full illumination from all the lights falls on the stage, brightly lighting up the
centre, where the ‗truth‘ lies.
(6) A world view is not complete in itself until it is able to refute, implicitly or
explicitly, contrary world views. This is often a forgotten factor when arriving at a
position. The law of non-contradiction (that a statement and its opposite cannot
both be true) applies not only within a world view but also between world views.
Thus it is more reasonable to say that all religions we know of are wrong then to
assert that they are all right.
359
 SECOND CHANCE

Most eastern philosophers despise the law of non-contradiction, but they cannot
shake its life-sized reality. The more they seek to assault the law of non-
contradiction, the more it assaults them. For this very reason, and in recognition of
its undeniability, an eastern mystic said, ―It is better to remain silent, for when the
mouth opens, all are fools.‖ The problem is that his mouth opened to tell us that.
Let me illustrate this specific point with what happened to me some time ago. I was
asked to give a lecture, by a Professor of Philosophy, on why I had chosen the
Christian world view over the world view of Hinduism. I had been reluctant to do
so, but the professor insisted.
As the lecture unfolded I could see his discomfort, for I was touching upon the
nerve of his world view – the basic laws of logic and how they apply to reality. I
began by applying the law of non-contradiction.
Parenthetically, for those who are not familiar with the this kind of thinking, and
for whom philosophy is not part of the daily diet, the law of non-contradiction
works something like this: Suppose my wife and I were walking together and you
came by and said, ―Hello, Mr and Mrs Zacharias. I hear that you are expecting a
baby.‖ If, to your question, my wife answered ―Yes‖ at the same time that I said
―No‖, what would you think ? You might conclude that an attempt at humour
was being made, or that perhaps the woman accompanying me is not Mrs
Zacharias, or possibly that she has not yet broken the news to me. This is because
the same question, at the same time, meaning the same thing cannot elicit two
absolutely opposite answers. It is the simple clue to truth that we use in the
courtroom and at our workplace. It is the law of non-contradiction. This was the
key issue that this professor wished to address.
[In the lecture] I continued by demonstrating that in the myriad postulations of
Hinduism there are numerous contradictions, a fact admitted to by even some of its
leading proponents. If the law of non-contradiction applies to reality and Hinduism
is plagued by contradiction, then I concluded that, as a system, Hinduism is false.
At the end of lecture, the professor of philosophy, stormed to the front and exploded
‗You have done the greatest damage to Eastern philosophy I have ever seen anyone
do, and the reason is that you don‘t understand the Eastern mind.‘ I agreed with
the Professor to continue to discuss this issue with him over lunch, rather than in
the lecture hall, to which he agreed.
At lunch, he began with, ‗Your biggest problem is that you do not understand
Eastern logic.‖ I concluded it would be best to let him explain Eastern logic to me.
His argument expounded on two kinds of logic, one the either/or logic and the
other, the both/and logic. ―The either/or logic,‖ he said, ―is built on the law of
non-contradiction, meaning that if a statement is true, its opposite has to be false.‖
So far I agreed with him. He continued, ‗This is a Western way of looking at
reality.‘ On this point I disagreed, but let him carry on.

360
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

His next major explanation was on the dialectical method. This is not either/or;
this is both/and. Hegel used this method in his dialectic between an idea (a thesis)
and it‘s opposite (an antithesis) to the synthesis (the middle ground). Karl Marx
used it to demonstrate history‘s inexorable move from the employer on one side and
the employee on the other to a merger into a classless society (Strangely, no one ever
shows you a classless society). The philosophy professor went to great length to
establish that the both/and logic as being a superior way to establish the truth.
―So, Dr Zacharias,‖ he said, ―when you see one Hindu affirming that God is
personal and another insisting that God is not personal, just because it is
contradictory you should not see it as a problem. The real problem is that you are
seeing the contradiction as a Westerner when you should be approaching it as an
Easterner. The both/and is the Eastern way of viewing reality.‘
After he had belaboured these two ideas of either/or and both/and for some time
and asserted that we ought not to study truth from a Western (either/or) point of
view but from an Eastern (both/and) viewpoint, I finally asked if I could
interrupt with a question. He agreed.
I said, ―Sir, are you telling me that when I am studying Hinduism I either use
the both/and system of logic or nothing else?‖
There was pin-drop silence for what seemed an eternity. I repeated my question:
Are you telling me that when I am studying Hinduism I either use the both/and
system of logic or nothing else? Have I got that right?‖
He threw his head back and said, ―The either/or does seem to emerge, doesn‘t it?‖
―Indeed, it does emerge,‖ I said. ―And as a matter of fact, even in India, we look
both ways before we cross the street – it is either the bus or me, not both of us.‖
Do you see the mistake that he was making? He was using the either/or logic in
order to prove the both/and. The more you try to hammer the law of non-
contradiction, the more it hammers you.
Now let me make two vitally, vitally important points here. This Professor was
partly right. In the East there is a popular tendency to appear accepting of all
religions as just different facets of the same truth… However, popular Hinduism is
not classical Hinduism, and the whole method of teaching of the greatest Hindu
philosopher Shankara was quite Socratic as he debated ideas not in a dialectical
mode (both/and) but in a non-contradictory mode (either/or). He would challenge
his antagonists to prove him wrong, and if not, to surrender to his view. The point,
then, is not whether we use an Eastern logic or a Western logic. We use logic that
best reflects reality, and the law of non-contradiction is implicitly or explicitly
implied by both the East and the West.

361
 SECOND CHANCE

There is a second point that needs to be made about the law of non-contradiction.
It is ultimately not a test for truth but for falsehood. A statement may be non-
contradictory but nevertheless false. For example, there is nothing non-contradictory
within the statement that there is a red car in my driveway, nevertheless it could
still be false.
Ravi confirmed the source of my confusion, I was trying to make sense
and assimilate statements that were contradictory. I was not going mad. I
had to reject those explanations that contradicted each other. Ravi
Zacharias had given the broad components of what a world view should
have, but I wanted some more specifics.
I turned to the other book „Can Man Live Without God‟, and to the
chapter on „Getting to the Truth‟, Ravi Zacharias wrote:
I suggest that there are three tests to which any system or statement that makes a
claim to truth must be subjected as a preliminary requirement if that statement is
to be considered meaningful for debate. Those three tests are (1) logical consistency,
(2) empirical adequacy, and (3) experiential relevance. The truth claims of
Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, Islam or atheism must all meet these tests.
I pondered on what Ravi Zacharias meant specifically by these three
areas. For logical consistency, he had mentioned the test of
correspondence and coherence, as two logical tests. I understood that the
test of correspondence, is that a statement corresponds to with reality.
For example, I could make the statement that if I hold an object above
my head and I let it go, it will stay suspended in mid air. Clearly this
statement does not correspond with reality, so it would fail the test of
correspondence. For me a lot of what the gurus had been saying about
their teachings coming from the Vedas did not correspond to reality,
what they were saying was simply not in the version of the Rig Veda that
I had read. I was also beginning to understand the test of coherence. A
guru would say one thing in one interview and then contradict what he
had said in another interview, I had noticed this particularly in the
interviews with Srila Prabhupada.
I realised, that it was not that I didn‟t understand the sophisticated
viewpoint, but rather, it was simply that Srila Prabhupada‟s statements
failed the test of coherence. It also failed the test of correspondence, as
he was affirming that Bhakti Yoga is the best way to reach realisation in
this age, but this was not what Krishna said in the Bhagavad Gita. I was
not going mad. These gurus were simply making statements that were
illogical, and therefore not true, according to the laws of logic.
I leafed through the rest of the book to look for an elaboration on what
Ravi Zacharias meant by empirical adequacy and experiential relevance. I
couldn‟t find any elaboration. I concluded that empirical adequacy is that
the truth claims of any world view should fit in what we know about
history, and what we know about the Universe, do they fit with what we
362
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

know? I guessed that the final one, experiential relevance, had to do with
whether those things that a particular world-view says would happen, do
happen. On this front I had definitely had experiential evidence. It was
on the point of experiential evidence that I had always found Christianity
lacking. However, this was changing given my recent experiences with
Faith Church, learning about the Holy Spirit, and reading about people
having deep spiritual experiences as described in the Bible. But, these
remained the experiences of others. As yet I did not feel that I had
experienced the Holy Spirit. Roshan had argued that it was the love of the
Holy Spirit that I had felt when I first went to his church and heard the
songs, but that was his explanation. I remained sceptical.
Ravi did have something specific to say about the Hindu world view.
If one were to grant some of Hinduism‘s pre-suppositions, Hinduism can meet
these three tests [logical consistency, empirical adequacy, and experiential
relevance]. But when those pre-suppositions are scrutinised by other methods of
truth testing that fall outside the bounds of sheer logic, the pre-suppositions
themselves are found to be indefensible. As an instance, one of the pre-suppositions
of Hinduism is that the material world as we know it is not distinct from the
ultimate, impersonal Brahman. If we grant Hinduism that assumption, it meets
the three tests for truth. On the other hand, if we can prove that assumption to be
false, the edifice of pantheism (the belief in many gods, and that everything is god
and god is everything ) collapses.
Dr Geisler [a highly acclaimed Christian apologist] helps in this area, by bringing
to our attention two tests that, in effect, negate pantheism. One is called the
undeniability test; it is a test for truth. The other is the unaffirmability test, a test
for falsehood.
Take, for example, the issue of my existence. While my own existence cannot be
logically proven, it is nevertheless existentially undeniable. That means I cannot
deny my existence without affirming it at the same time. I recall the classic
interaction between a student and his professor. ―How do I know that I exist ?‖
demanded the student in a philosophy lecture. ―And whom shall I say is asking ?‖
came the reply. Undeniability, therefore, is clearly a test for truth.
The unaffirmability test, on the other hand, is a test for falsehood. This basically
means that just because something can be stated, it does not follow that the
statement is true. ―I cannot speak a word of English,‖ may be passionately stated,
but it cannot be affirmed at the same time. For while saying, ― I cannot speak a
word of English,‖ I am actually speaking several words of English. Therefore, my
statement is false. In Hinduism one has to say, in effect, ―God exists, but I don‘t.‖
It is an unaffirmable position.

363
 SECOND CHANCE

I re-read the passage several times, to make sure that I had understood
what Ravi Zacharias was saying. I wasn‟t sure whether he had disproved
Hinduism or not. It was true that the statement, ―God exists, but I don‘t‖,
was unaffirmable and false. But, I was not convinced of Ravi Zacharias‟
own pre-supposition that, „Hinduism one has to say, in effect, ―God exists, but I
don‘t,‖ was correct, in the first place. I had heard some gurus say this
(Srila Prabupada from ISKON) that the material world (ie Creation) was
the same as the Creator, the two were not distinct. Gieseler had proved
that this ISKON view was logically inconsistent. But I knew that not all
Indian gurus all would say that the material Creation was indistinct from
the creator. I had read another commentary on the Bhagavad Gita that
was produced by the Chinmaya Mission, they believed that the Creator
and the Creation were distinct, consequently their entire interpretation of
the Bhagavad Gita was quite different from that of ISKON.
Ravi Zacharias had definitely got me thinking, and had provided some
objective tools which I could use to analyse and evaluate, both what I had
read and what I had been told. I read on.
One surprising illusion under which the modern critic of Christianity lives is the
belief that Christianity is the only system of belief that is exclusivist. This
assumption reveals a significant ignorance of all of the major world-views present
today. In reality, every system is implicitly exclusivist. Buddhism was born out of a
repudiation of two cardinal doctrines of Hinduism. Gautama Buddha rejected the
Vedas as the ultimate truth and denounced the caste system out rightly. The caste
system, of course, was inextricably woven into the doctrine of reincarnation and
hence, the nuance of difference in Buddhism‘s doctrine of transmigration
Sikhism, in effect, rejected both Hinduism and Buddhism. And in a valiant
attempt to pull everything together, Baha‘ism, an attempt at religious universalism,
de-veined all of them and excluded the exclusivists. Even a cursory understanding
of Islam conveys its radical exclusivism. As for anti-theism, it rejects all theistic
viewpoints and treats their beliefs as orphaned from reason. So let us be honest;
let‘s remove this scar attributed by antitheists to Christianity that supposedly mars
the otherwise beautiful countenance of religious or secular tolerance.
Ah hah! I thought. I felt that this was true. All viewpoints were
exclusivist. Srila Prabhupada, of ISKCON, had said that bhakti yoga of
Krishna, was the only and best way. Swami Muktananda had advocated
receiving Shaktipat and performing Kriya yoga. Maharashi Mahesh Yogi
had exclusively promoted his mantras, and Transcendental Meditation as
the best and superior way. They were all exclusive, Buddhism was
exclusive. I had been hung up about Christianity‟s exclusivity, because
that was the argument that I had used while at University, to keep the
bible bashing Christian Union „junkies‟ at bay. It was only now that I
realised, that it had been a prejudiced viewpoint rather than a substantive
logical un-emotive argument. So there was nothing wrong in Christianity,
364
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

being exclusive, nor any other religion being exclusive for that matter. If
it is the truth, then it does not matter whether it is exclusive or not. I
carried on reading.
The issue, then, is not whether the belief system you espouse – monotheistic,
atheistic, pantheistic, or otherwise – is exclusive. The issue is whether the answers
to the four basic questions of life pertaining to origin, meaning/salvation, morality
and destiny within the context of each of these world-views meet the tests of truth.
Are they logically consistent, are they empirically adequate, and are they
experientially relevant? Do they meet the tests of unaffirmability and
undeniability? The answers to life‘s four questions must in each instance correspond
to reality, and the sum of the answers must cohere as a system.
Let me therefore reiterate that truth, by definition, will always be exclusive. Indeed,
Jesus claimed such exclusivity. Had He not made such an assertion, He would
have been unreasonably implying that truth is all inclusive, which it cannot be. The
real question that remains is whether Jesus‘ claims to truth withstand the tests for
truth and whether, in His person, He met those tests.
At last I had a framework to put down all the different views, that I had
come across; and a way to evaluate them. I took a piece of paper and
drew out four columns. On the four columns I put wrote down the four
factors that Ravi had mentioned origin, morality, meaning/salvation and
destiny. I pondered on these four factors, trying to simply state what they
mean. For origin, I put down the question, why are we here? For destiny,
is there life after death/ or what happens to us after we die? For morality,
how should one live life/ what should be one‟s code of conduct? For
meaning/salvation, what is the path to ultimate happiness? To these four,
I added one more question, is there a God? Under each column I put
down all the different ideas that I had come across, grouping them under
the appropriate heading.
It was only when I listed the possibilities that, I had come across, did I
begin to understand why I had felt so confused. Not all the statements
could be correct. That would go against the law of non-contradiction. I
also needed to pick answers from each column that would be coherent
with one another. Then check first whether they matched with what was
known about history and the universe: empirical adequacy. Then check
with what I had experienced in my own life against tests for undeniability
and unaffirmability: experiential relevance. I felt that I had made progress,
in getting this far.

365
 SECOND CHANCE

My mind must have been working overtime, I felt utterly exhausted and
went to sleep.
I was woken up the next morning by the telephone ringing.
„Hello Arjuna, its Samson here. Where are you? We need to leave in
fifteen minutes to get to the conference on time. Are you okay?‟
„Yes I‟m okay,‟ I replied, „I‟ll be down in a moment,‟ I got dressed
quickly and rushed downstairs.
„So did you get a chance to read the books?‟ asked Samson.
„Yes I did. It was very useful,‟ I took out the piece of paper with the
grid, that I drawn out, and showed it to Samson.
„Wow, that‟s very interesting, I have never seen it all summarised like
that before,‟ said Samson, scrutinising the sheet.
„Now, I have an even tougher task, working out which of these
statements is true, assuming that any of them are true. I hope that the
truth is somewhere in here. If it is not then I am totally lost.‟

366
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

„I am sure that God will guide you in finding the truth,‟ replied Samson.
There were a number of speakers that day, which were interesting, but
not tremendously helpful in furthering my own personal quest. The last
speaker was Ravi Zacharias, he covered a lot of the material that I had
read in his two books the night before. Samson‟s suggestion, to read the
books before hand, had been a good one. As a result I had found Ravi
Zacharias‟ points easier to understand.
I had read Ravi‟s critique of a Hindu world view, that „God exists, but I
do not, I am simply an illusion‟, and how that failed the test of
undeniability. He now went on to look at the world view of Islam. I had
been impressed by what I had been told by the Imam, and was interested
to know what Ravi had to say about it.
His first point was:
They say that Islam is for the entire world. That Mohammed was the ultimate
prophet. That Mohammed did not do any miracles because the Holy Qur‘an in its
entirety is a miracle in itself. Thus the Qur‘an is for everyone. But the Qur‘an is
written in the Arabic dialect of Mohammed. Unless I know the dialect then I will
never know the miracle. Because I am told that the translations of the Qur‘an into
other languages are not accurate. Thus this is a problem that you have a miracle
which can only be known by a small subset of the world‘s population – then how
can this be for the entire world – it contradicts the first statement.
The Imam, that I had met, had not stressed this point. I had seen
versions of the Holy Qur‟an in English. Ravi‟s postulation would only be
correct if, indeed, he had been told that the Holy Qur‟an can only be read
in the original language for a true interpretation, and that all translations
are accurate.
His second point was:
They say that the Bible of the Jews and Christians is inaccurate. Jesus did not die.
How can you claim that something is false without having something that is true to
compare it to ? This claim is unverifiable.
The Imam had said that the Holy Qur‟an was the ultimate truth and
that the Holy Bible was false. I thought about this and concluded that
Ravi did have a point; the Imam was claiming that the Qur‟an was the
truth, and that anything that did not agree with it was false. But then how
can we test whether the Qur‟an itself is true? This was a conundrum.
However, I did feel that the same logic could be applied to the Holy Bible
and other scriptures, and each of them would fail the test of being
unverifiable, it would nullify all religious scriptures. This was not helpful.
It supported the agnostic point of view.
His third point and fourth point:
Mohammed was 500 years after Christ. If the Bible was the revelation as (a), then
Mohammed came along and gave an updated revelation (revelation (b)) and if that
367
 SECOND CHANCE

is the way that the Sovereign God works then what is there to stop somebody else
coming later and saying that I now have the latest update (c) that supersedes (a)
and (b). In effect that is what Joseph Smith did with Mormonism.
This seemed to make sense. But then I realised, that the Imam had said
that the Holy Qur‟an revelation was not an update, but had been given by
a Sovereign God because the previous revelation in the Holy Bible, true
at the time, had been corrupted and incorrectly written down, either at
that time or in subsequent translations.
The next point, was similar to the previous point:
New absolutes over-rule previous absolutes. This is not a tenable position.
I agreed that it would not be a tenable position, if the new revelation
was an update, rather than being re-issued as the previous revelation had
been incorrectly transcribed.
His fifth and last point:
Islam reserves the right to slander and debunk all that others say, and when the
other party criticises what they believe, then they call that blasphemy, and in the
extreme can issue a fatwa against you to kill you.
This statement, initially, had the most resonance with me. Ravi was
effectively saying that Islam uses one standard for others, and another
standard for themselves. Clearly if other world views are blasphemous
towards Islam, then the converse must be true, that the Islamic world-
view is blasphemous when considered by opposing world views. If all
world-views were to take the Islamic point of view, albeit in the extreme,
then we would end up all killing each other, because we disagreed with
one another. I found this a frightening view point, if it was indeed true.
The Imam I had met had said that Jihad was spiritual and not physical,
but then he had contradicted himself, by saying that Mohammed, as
explained in the hadiths, had advocated that physical intervention was the
highest form of intervention.
The teachings of Christ, love your enemies, did appear to be morally
superior to that which seemed to be practiced in Islam, by some. I
remembered what Ravi had said about the logical out workings of
atheism, compared to the illogical out workings of Christianity.
I felt that this last point rested on whether Osama bin Laden had
correctly interpreted the Holy Qur‟an, and was simply doing what he was
being told to do; in which case one would have to seriously doubt
whether the Holy Qur‟an was ever a revelation from a merciful
compassionate God. Or whether bin Laden had got it wrong and that
jihad really was a spiritual struggle. This was where Ravi‟s test of
empirical adequacy might be helpful. An examination of the Prophet
Mohammed‟s life, as to how he implemented what had been revealed to

368
 ESTABLISHING & EVALUATING A WORLDVIEW

him, and the history of Islam subsequently would help point me in the
right direction, on this issue.
Ravi Zacharias ended the conference with a quote from GK
Chesterton,
‗It is not that Christianity has been tried and found wanting, rather it has been
found difficult and untried.‘
As we left the conference, Samson turned to me and said, „So Arjuna,
are you glad that you came?‟
„Yes I am glad, that I came. I have gained a way to critically examine
what I have been told. However, it just seems to me that in any world-
view, even in the simplest statements, there are so many pre-suppositions.
It seems an impossible task to objectively apply the three tests that Ravi
talked about, logical consistency, empirical adequacy, and experiential
relevance, to all the pre-suppositions, without going totally crazy in doing
so and within a life time. I wonder whether ultimately, it comes down to
preference, as Bertrand Russell seemed to advocate, only because it is so
complicated.‟ I replied.
Samson looked at me and said, „I think I understand what you are
saying. In another conference that I had been to, Ravi had said, getting to
the truth is like climbing over a high wall. You need to have faith to stand
on the shoulders of reason to look over that wall. I do believe that you
cannot logically exhaust and test every pre-supposition. However, you
can eliminate certain statements and world-views because they are
illogical. You will then be left, with a small handful of statements which
will require faith for you to believe in.‟
I pondered for a while on what Samson had said.
„I guess you are right, Samson. In that sense this conference has been
tremendously useful. It has given me a framework and some tools which
I can use to eliminate some world-views on the basis of reason,‟ I replied.
„Yes, that is all that we can do. Ultimately it is about having faith, a
reasonable faith in what you believe. The more you have thought about it,
the more reason you will have to believe in whatever you end up
believing.‟
Wise words indeed, I thought to myself. There was a lot more to think
about, but now I had a way to think about it, a way to sort out all of the
tumbling confusion. Progress indeed.

369
SECOND CHANCE

370
 25 THE UPANISHADS & THE BIBLE

I had booked myself into a ridiculously early flight 5:15am. Every time I
did that, I would vow never to do it again, yet here I was again,
completely shattered. Luckily, and naturally, at that time in the morning
there were very few people, consequently check in was smooth and quick.
I took my seat in the plane, it was practically empty. I thought that I
would have the three seats to myself. Much to my annoyance, just before
they closed the doors, a tall elderly looking gentleman, with a long grey
beard came along and sat right next to me. I wondered what that check in
girl was thinking, this man could have had three seats to himself, and I
could have had three seats to myself, yet here we were bunched up
together.
He looked at me and smiled, as if he was reading my thoughts. I smiled
back, I couldn‟t help thinking that I had seen him somewhere before. I
was still sleepy and closed my eyes. But, this man‟s face kept on popping
up in my head, my brain was trying to work out whether and where I had
met him. It was really irritating. I opened my eyes, smiled at the old man
and asked, „Have we met before?‟.
„No, not that I can recall, but I feel that I have seen you, were you at the
Ravi Zacharias conference?‟ he asked.
„Yes I was. Were you there too?‟
„Yes. Perhaps we would have seen each other, and it would have
registered in our subconscious. My name is Abraham, pleased to meet
you.‟ He held out his hand.
I shook his hand and said, „My name is Arjuna, are you staying in
Mumbai?‟
„No, I live in Ahmedabad,‟ he replied
„Ahmedabad. I also live in Ahmedabad, in Bodakdev.‟

371
 SECOND CHANCE

„I am also staying in Bodakdev,‟ this was another one of those bizarre

coincidences.
„I am in Apartment 399,‟ I replied; it would be too crazy if he was also
staying there.
„Yes I know that block. I live in the apartment block next to it, Sunrise
Apartments. What a coincidence,‟ Abraham chuckled as he spoke.
„Yes it is a coincidence. They appear to be happening a lot to me,‟ I
replied.
„Perhaps God is trying to tell you something Arjuna.‟
„If he is, then I do not understand it. The truth seems to be eluding me.‟
„It is like that for everyone, it takes time to tune into God‟s frequency,‟
replied Abraham.
This was a very unusual thing to say, I was staring at him. Abraham
simply smiled back.
„Did you enjoy the conference?‟ asked Abraham.
„I am not sure whether I would use the word enjoy, but I did learn a lot
of new things. Ravi Zacharias made some very interesting and thought
provoking points. Some of which I agreed with, other points I was less
sure about.‟
„Oh really? Was there anything in particular that you didn‟t agree with?‟
asked Abraham.
„Well yes there was. It was when he was critiquing the Islamic
worldview; he made a comment that the Holy Qur‟an could not be
verified as being truthful, as there was nothing to compare it to, therefore
there was something wrong with the Islamic world-view. I understood
the logic, but then I could apply the same logic to all of the other
religious scriptures, and that would give sufficient grounds to dismiss all
religions as false, which would mean that the atheists would have won the
day. This disturbed me.‟
„I can see why this would disturb you, and you are correct to draw the
conclusion that you have got to, based on your pre-suppositions. The
primary pre-supposition is that any religious scripture needs to be verified
against another such scripture, which is known to be absolutely correct. If
you assume this pre-supposition then your conclusion would be correct.
However, your pre-supposition is incorrect,‟ Abraham paused and
stroked his beard.
„Well how else can you test a scripture, if not by comparing it with
another book? What other pre-supposition can one make, other than the
one that I made?‟ I asked, thinking that I had got him.
„Yes there is an alternative pre-supposition. The ultimate test of any
religious scripture,‟ he paused again.
„And what is that?‟ I asked.
„That is whether the religious scripture tallies with history. There are
some, not many, religious scriptures that make prophecies about the
372
 THE UPANISHADS & THE BIBLE

future. If the prophecies come true then one has some reason to believe
that the rest of what is written could also be true.‟
„I am not sure whether I have come across such a scripture,‟ I said
thinking of what I had recently read in the Vedas, and thinking back to
the Bhagavad Gita.
„You probably have but have not realised it. Many people do not realise
it. I am talking about the Holy Bible. It consists of 66 separate books,
written by 32 writers; priests, prophets, Kings, doctors, shepherds and
fishermen, over a period of 1600 years from 1500BC to 100AD. It has
31,124 verses which have been analysed by a biblical scholar, Dr J Barton
Payne in his Encyclopaedia of Biblical Prophecy. The Bible has 1,817
separate predictions. 8,352 of the verses, some 27% of the Bible, are
prophetic in nature. A staggering 737 of these predictions have been
accurately partially or totally been fulfilled. The remaining predictions are
mostly to do with the second coming of Jesus Christ, which has not yet
happened.‟
„1,817 predictions?‟ I replied incredulously.
„Yes 1,817 predictions, as analysed by Dr Payne. You can get his book
and go through verse by verse, and verify it yourself. It is the quantity of
predictions, 737 predictions to be more precise, that have already been
fulfilled and known to be true that is the more staggering. You see if you
are God, then you know the future, and if you were going to author a
religious scripture then it would be logical for you to do something that
would not leave any doubt that God had authored it. The most obvious
thing to do is to put a whole load of predictions in it. If they are wrong
then the whole book will be rejected.‟
„So are you telling me that the Holy Bible is the only scripture that has
predictions which have come true, and therefore it is the true religion?‟ I
asked.
„No I am not telling you what the true religion is, you have to discover
that for yourself. The Holy Qur‟an also has predictions in it, but only a
handful, they have also come true. But, the Holy Bible stands out alone as
having such a high proportion, 27% having a prophetic nature. You must
agree, that is very unusual,‟ said Abraham, very calmly.
„Yes I would agree with you that is unusual,‟ I sat back in my chair, and
pondered on what Abraham had told me. I made a note of the book by
Dr Payne. I wanted to check what Abraham was saying for myself.
I was thinking back to what I had read of the Bible, most of it had been
at school. At the time it had not struck me as being prophetic, or even
that accurate, just a collection of mythological stories. Then I
remembered, why I thought that.
„Abraham, you say that if God was going to author a scripture then he
would ensure that it was accurate, to make it obvious to people that it was
from God?‟
373
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes, Arjuna, that is exactly correct,‟ replied Abraham.

„Then how can you explain what it says in the Holy Bible about the
whole universe, the stars and the earth being created in just six days? That
is just blatantly not true. There are stars which are millions of light years
away from us, and we can see them, so it must have taken the light
millions of years to reach us. That is an undeniable physical fact.
Therefore, the universe is millions of years old, thus the Holy Bible
account is false, and therefore God could not have been its author,‟ I was
pleased with my argumentation.
Abraham looked at me and stroked his beard. I thought I had got him
stumped. I also wondered why I was so argumentative with a total
stranger. This was not at all polite. But I was enjoying the conversation,
especially as I was winning.
„Those are very good points Arjuna. Once again your logic and your
conclusions would be absolutely correct, based on your pre-suppositions.
However, one of your pre-suppositions, may be incorrect.‟
„And which one is that ?‟ I asked.
„You are assuming that the earth and the universe are the same age. I do
agree with you that all of the physical evidence points to the universe
being millions, and millions of years old, including the sun and the moon.
However, there has been quite a lot of work done recently that supports a
hypothesis that the earth may not be that old, and considerably younger
than the rest of the universe, as little as 6-7000 years old.‟
„That is totally preposterous!‟ As soon as I said it, I realised that I
should not have said that. „Sorry to be so rude,‟ I continued, „but how
can the earth be a totally different age from the rest of the universe. That
statement defies all logic and all physics!‟
„Yes I know it does sound very illogical and counter to what everyone
else is saying. I am not a scientist, but I have a book called „Starlight and
Time‟ by Dr Humphreys, in my library at home, and some other books
by leading scientists that believe in a young earth theory. I suggest that
you go through that, and then we will talk again on this issue. Do you
have a science background?‟
„Yes I do, and I would very much like to read this book. I can‟t imagine
how it could, even remotely, be possible for the earth to be young and
the universe to be old,‟ I replied.
There was another prolonged bout of silence. Perhaps I had upset
Abraham. I had been rather rude to a total stranger.
„Have you been in Ahmedabad for a long time?‟ I asked. I wanted to re-
engage with Abraham, and thought of asking something that would be
innocuous.
„No, just for the last ten years. I have lived in many places, before
coming to Ahmedabad,‟ replied Abraham.
„Your line of work, took you to these many places?‟ I asked.
374
 THE UPANISHADS & THE BIBLE

„You could say that.‟

I was getting more curious, „May I ask what line of work you were in?‟
„Yes you may. I have done many things, at one time I was a Professor
of Comparative Theology.‟
„Comparative Theology?‟
„Yes, a study of world religions, comparing them, analysing their
commonalities and differences. That is why I went to the conference, in
essence that is what Ravi Zacharias was lecturing us on. I like to keep
abreast of what people are saying, even though I have long since retired.‟
„I am curious to ask you a question.‟
„Please do ask, however, I cannot promise that I will be able to answer
your question.‟
„Is there any linkage between the religions, for example is there any
linkage between Hinduism and Christianity?‟ I asked.
„That is a very good question, and it is one that I have spent many years
researching. To be honest, it depends on your point of view. The Vedas
and the Upanishads are difficult to interpret, so is the Holy Bible in some
places. For there to be a link between the scriptures you would have to
correctly interpret both the Holy Bible and the Vedas. You may not be
aware, but there are many ways to interpret the Bible. I can give you my
interpretation, but it may not necessarily be one, that you agree with,‟
Abraham smiled.
„But do you think there is a link?‟ I didn‟t want to let Abraham of the
hook.
„Well, there might be, but it is a tenuous link, and it is my personal
opinion. You see I believe that if there was a God, then he would have
tried to reveal himself to all the nations of the earth. If he was speaking to
the prophets of one race, then he would be speaking to the prophets of
other races. Now, this is my pre-supposition, it is pure conjecture. If this
is true, then when God was speaking to the prophets in the Bible, in the
Middle East, then he was also talking to the prophets in India. Now there
is some evidence to support that this might be the case, as the
Upanishads, the Hindu explanatory texts of the Vedas, were written at
the same time as the Major Prophets, Isaiah and others, in the Holy Bible,
around 700BC,‟ Abraham paused and stared right back at me, I felt that
he was checking whether I was interested in hearing more.
„I am listening, I really find all of this fascinating, please carry on.‟
„Okay, but I have to warn you, that it is purely my opinion, in the way
that I have chosen to interpret the scriptures. Many people would
disagree with my interpretation. I urge you to make up your own mind.
Test everything that I tell you, if you are really interested in knowing the
truth.‟
„I have understood. I am interested in hearing your opinion, I am sure
that I will learn something.‟
375
 SECOND CHANCE

„There are a number of potential linkages. The first is between a prayer

contained in the Brihad-Aranyaka Upanishad and the gospel according to
the apostle John. The opening lines of the Brihad-Aranyaka Upanishad,
in Sanskrit are:
Asatoma sat gamaya;
Tomosoma jyotir gamaya;
Amrutuma mrutyir gamaya;
Which is translated as:
Lead me from delusion (or untruth) to truth;
Lead me from darkness to light;
Lead me from death to eternal life.
There are various verses in the gospel of John, which could be
interpreted as being a fulfilment of this prayer in the Brihad-Aranyaka
Upanishad. Let us take each line by line.
The first line Lead me from delusion (or untruth) to truth; in the gospel of
John in the New Testament, chapter 14, verse 6 it says: Jesus answered, ―I
am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through
me.‖
The second line Lead me from darkness to light; in the gospel of John in the
New Testament, chapter 12, verse 46, Jesus says: I have come into the world
as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness.
The third line Lead me from death to eternal life; in the gospel of John in the
New Testament, chapter 10, verse 28, Jesus says: I give them eternal life, and
they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand.‘
It is unusual that Jesus should use such similar language as that of an
Upanishad. It could be a coincidence, but what would be the probability
that all three conditions are claimed to have been met my Jesus. This
Upanishad was written in India, approximately 700 years, before John
wrote these words in the Middle East. Is it just a coincidence?‟ Abraham
smiled and stroked his beard.
„It does seem unusual. I am also surprised that you can remember all
these verses.‟ I said.
„I have had this same conversation many times, with many people. Over
the years I have remembered all of these verses. There are some other
verses in the other Upanishads that appear to have very similar parallels
in the gospel of John, are you interested in knowing about those ?‟ asked
Abraham.
„Yes I am.‟
„These aren‟t in any order. In the Isa Upanisad verse 3, it says, There are
demon haunted worlds, regions of utter darkness. Whoever in life denies the Spirit falls
into that darkness of death. There is something similar in John chapter 3,
verses 18-21: Jesus says ‗Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever
376
 THE UPANISHADS & THE BIBLE

does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of
God‘s one and only Son. 19 This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men
loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20 Everyone who does evil
hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.
21 But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that

what he has done has been done through God.‖

In the Katha Upanishad Part 2 verse 8, it says He cannot be taught by one
who has not reached him; and he cannot be reached by much thinking. The way to him
is through a Teacher who has seen him: He is higher than the highest thoughts, in
truth above all thought. In John 6:45-46, Jesus says It is written in the Prophets:
‗They will all be taught by God.‘ Everyone who listens to the Father and learns from
him comes to me. 46 No one has seen the Father except the one who is from God; only
he has seen the Father.
In the Katha Upanishad Chapter 2, verse 16 and 17, it is written ‗that
Word is the everlasting Brahman: that Word is the highest End. When the sacred
Word is known, all longings are fulfilled. It is the supreme means of salvation: it is the
help supreme. When that great Word is known, one is great in the heaven of
Brahman.‘
Brahman is the title of Creator. We see in John Chapter 1 an echo of
this Upanishad, verses 1-4: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was
with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning. 3 Through
him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4 In him
was life, and that life was the light of men. In verse 14, The Word became flesh and
made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only,
who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.; and verse 12 But as many as
received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that
believe on his name.
You see Arjuna, there are a number of parallels, and similarities. I
believe that there is a linkage. I urge you to read the Bible and the
Upanishads and decide for yourself, do not take my word for it.‟
I asked Abraham for the references, I wrote them down. I would check
them with the Upanishads that I had at home. I was beginning to feel like
„Alice in Wonderland‟, this was all getting „curiouser and curiouser‟. I had
left Hyderabad with the conviction that all of the religions had very
different messages. Ravi had given a proof, of sorts, as to the problem of
Hinduism. Yet here was Abraham, quoting Hindu scripture and Christian
scripture, which seemed to be virtually the same. I could not work out
what was going. I wish I hadn‟t started the conversation with Abraham.
The rest of the journey to Ahmedabad was mostly spent sleeping. When
we got to Ahmedabad, I realised that I had forgotten to tell Pankaj, my
driver, to pick me up. Abraham was gracious to give me a lift. Abraham
suggested that we go to his place first, so that he could give me that book
by Dr Humphreys, which was supposed to explain how there could be a
young earth in a very old universe.
377
 SECOND CHANCE

Abraham‟s place was very close to mine. It didn‟t take long for
Abraham to fetch the book, „here it is, take your time to read it. I‟ve left
my card in the book. Give me a call, once you have finished it. We can sit
and discuss it.‟ I thanked Abraham for the book. Abraham waved good-
bye and asked his driver to take me home.
Rita was just getting up and when I entered the house. She was
surprised to see me. I explained that I had got a lift from a very
interesting gentleman.
„You keep on meeting with interesting people,‟ she replied, „what I want
to know is whether you have found the answer, that you have been
looking for.‟
„Not yet, darling, but I can‟t help feeling that I am close.‟
I went to sleep, although it was morning, the conversation with
Abraham had worn me out. Several days went by before I picked up the
book that Abraham had given me. In the meanwhile I had been checking
the references that he had given me in the Upanishads and in the Bible.
They had all checked out, there did seem to be similarities. I wondered,
was the Holy Bible with all those fulfilled prophecies, really the ultimate
reference book, as Abraham seemed to imply. Still there was the issue of
the account of creation in the Bible, six days, it seemed so ridiculous.

378
 26 CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME

It was with much skepticism that I started reading the book, „Starlight &
Time‟. From my understanding of physics, I knew that there was ample
physical evidence that showed that the universe is millions of years old,
because we know that many of the stars that we can see in the night sky
are millions of light years away. For the light from those stars to reach us,
so that we can see them, must mean that the universe is millions of years
old. If the universe was not that old then the light from those distant
stars would have insufficient time to reach us, which would mean that if
we looked at the night sky we would see nothing except black. We
wouldn‟t be able to see the stars. The light from those stars would still be
traveling towards us.
So the universe was definitely millions of years old, the question
remained then how can the earth be so young?
Dr Humphreys was attempting to use the theory of General Relativity
(GR), as postulated by Albert Einstein; to explain how there could be a
young earth in an old universe.
Dr Humphreys was basing his argument on a different set of pre-
suppositions, starting points/initial assumptions, than other physicists.
He stated the fact that no matter which part of the sky we look at the
total number of stars that we see is the same. It seems that the mass of
the universe is completely uniformly distributed, as seen from earth. The
obvious way to explain this phenomenon would be to assume that the
earth is very close to the centre of the universe. If this was the case, then
physicists would get extremely suspicious, and would immediately
conclude that there was an intelligent creator, God, at work. I agreed with
Dr Humphreys, that this amazing startling discovery would be a potent
proof for God‟s existence. Dr Humphreys went to explain that physicists
have come up with an alternative, very elaborate theory, as to why it
379
 SECOND CHANCE

looks as if the earth is at the centre of the universe. The physicists have
come up with a theory that says that no matter where you are in the
universe, it looks as if you are at the centre. They go on to assume that
the universe itself has no boundaries, if it did then there would be a
centre.
This is the pre-supposition that physicists have come up with: the earth
is not at the centre, and that the universe is unbounded. Dr Humphreys
went onto say that if these assumptions are put into the theory of
General Relativity, out pops the „Big Bang‟ theory that everyone is
familiar with.
His primary argument was what if the initial assumptions are incorrect.
What if the universe is really bounded and that earth is at the centre? If
this were true then another assumption could also be possible, that the
whole universe initially, could have been inside a white hole. A white hole
was another assumption, and quite a big assumption that Dr Humphreys
had come up with: a black hole working in reverse! He believed that it
was theoretically possible, although no one had yet observed one.
Anyway it looked as if there were a lot of assumptions, some pretty
radical ones that Dr Humphreys was making. His theory was based on
the assumptions that the universe is bounded, the earth is close to the
centre, initially the whole universe was in a white hole, and that the
universe expanded rapidly and is now expanded at a much slower rate. I
had not come across any other physicists sharing these assumptions. It
seemed that Dr Humphreys was the only scientist with this hypothesis.
Then I thought why am I being so critical of Dr Humphreys‟
assumptions, aren‟t other physicists‟ assumptions equally arbitrary. The
main difference is that Dr Humphrey‟s assumptions start off with the
pre-supposition that there is a God and that he did create the earth in six
„earth time‟ days. Even if Dr Humphreys was the only one who believed
this, and everyone else disagreed, he could still be correct. Or of course
Dr Humphreys and all the other physicists could all be wrong.
I carried on reading, just to see where all of this was heading. I was
getting close to the explanation. Dr Humphreys stated that white holes
and black holes have a boundary called an „event horizon‟. He wrote:
Strange things happen to time near an event horizon. In his popular book A Brief
History of Time, Stephen Hawking tells the story of a man, say an astronaut,
falling toward the event horizon of a black hole. I paraphrase it here as follows:
The astronaut is scheduled to reach the event horizon at 12:00 noon, as measured
by his watch. As he falls toward it, a dark sphere blocking off the starry
background, an astronomer watching him far away sees that the astronaut‘s watch
is ticking slower and slower. By the astronomer‘s wall clock, it takes an hour for
the astronaut‘s watch to go from 11:57am to 11:58. And then a day to reach
11:59! The astronomer never does see the astronaut‘s watch reach 12:00. Instead,
380
 CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME

he sees the motionless images of the astronaut and his watch getting redder and
dimmer, finally fading from view completely.
Hawking didn‘t describe much of what the astronaut could see, so here I take up
his story:
As the astronaut approached the event horizon, he looks back through binoculars
(very powerful binoculars!) at the astronomer‘s wall clock and sees it running faster
and faster. He sees the astronomer moving rapidly around the laboratory like a
movie in fast-forward. He sees planets and stars moving very rapidly around their
orbits. The whole universe far away from him is moving at a frenzied pace, aging
rapidly. Yet the astronaut sees that his own watch is ticking normally. When his
watch reaches 12:00 noon, the astronaut sees the hands of the astronomer‘s wall
clock moving forward so fast they are just a blur. As he crosses the event horizon,
he feels no particular sensation, but now he sees bright light inside the horizon. His
watch reaches 12:01 and continues ticking.
The main point is that according to GR, time effectively stands still at the event
horizon. Clocks and all physical processes at that location are stopped, and near
that location thy run very slowly (relative to clocks away from it). We have already
shown how the scientific evidence indicates that the universe (with the earth roughly
at its center) must have expanded out of a white hole which no longer exists. This
means that the event horizon shrank down to zero. GR sets no limit on the speed
at which such a shrinkage can take place, incidentally.

If you were standing on the earth as the event horizon arrived, distant objects in the
universe could age billions of years in a single day of your time. And there would be
ample time for their light to reach you.
Wow! I thought to myself, there were a lot of „very hairy‟ assumptions,
in all of this. I was not sure whether Dr Humphreys could claim that
„scientific evidence indicates that the universe must have expanded out of
a white hole‟. From my limited understanding of physics, what Dr
Humphreys was saying, could be a possibility, but it could also be totally
wrong. A white hole with a shrinking event horizon, with the earth at the

381
 SECOND CHANCE

center, was a very unusual, highly imaginative, set of assumptions. But

then I thought that the other assumptions that scientists have are also
quite extra-ordinary. I could neither prove nor disprove his assumptions
or those of other scientists, none of us were there at the time of creation
to verify any of this.
It was the next chapter of his book that really caught my attention:
Day One (Genesis 1:1-5)
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And
the earth was formless and void, and darkness was on the face of
the deep. And the spirit of God was moving on the face of the
waters.
God creates a large 3-D space and within it a ball of liquid water, the ―deep‖.
The ball is greater than two light –years (about ten trillion miles, approximately a
thousand times greater than the size of our solar system) in diameter, large enough
to contain all the mass of the universe… Imagine floating on the face of the deep
and gazing down into its unimaginable depths! That is why I think God called it
‗the deep‘.
Because of the great concentration of matter, this ball of water is deep within a
black hole, whose event horizon is more than a billion light-years away. The earth
at this point is merely a formless, undefined region of water at the center of the
deep, empty of inhabitant or feature. The deep is slowly rotating and there is no
visible light at the surface.
Because the enormous mass of the whole universe is contained in a ball of,
relatively, small size, the gravitational force on the deep is very strong, more than a
million trillion ‗g‘s. This force compresses the deep very rapidly toward the centre,
making it extremely hot and dense. The heat rips apart the water molecules, even
the nuclei into elementary particles.
And God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light.
Thermonuclear fusion reactions begin, forming heavier nuclei from lighter ones and
liberating huge amounts of energy. As a consequence, an intense light illuminates
the interior, breaking through to the surface and ending the darkness there.
Day Two (Genesis 1:6-8)
And God said, „Let there be an expanse in the midst of the
waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters.‟ And God
made the expanse, and separated the waters which were above
the expanse from the waters which were below the expanse.
By direct intervention God begins stretching out space, causing the ball of matter to
expand rapidly, thus changing the black hole to a white hole. He marks off a
large volume, ‗the expanse‘ within the deep, wherein material is allowed to pull
382
 CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME

apart into fragments and clusters as it expands, but He requires the ‗waters below‘
and the ‗waters above‘ the expanse to stay coherently together.

Normal physical processes cause cooling to proceed as rapidly as the expansion.

Heat waves are stretched out to much longer wavelengths as a relativistic
consequence of stretching out space… Matter beneath the expanse expands until
the surface reaches ordinary or present temperatures, becoming liquid water
underneath an atmosphere. God collects various heavier atoms beneath the surface
(formed from the fusion reaction) and constructs minerals from them, the core and
mantle… Out in the expanse, matter is drawn apart, leaving irregular clusters of
hydrogen, helium, and other atoms formed by the nuclear processes of the first day.
The waters above the expanse stay together.
And God called the expanse „heavens‟. And there was evening
and there was morning, a second day.
These heavens are interstellar space.
Day three (Genesis 1:9-13)
And God said, „Let the waters under the heavens be gathered
into one place, and let the dry land appear,” and it was so.
Rapid radioactive decay occurs, possibly as a consequence of the rapid stretching of
space. The resulting heating forms the earth‘s crust and makes it buoyant relative
to the mantle rock below it, causing the crust to rise above the waters, thus
gathering the waters into ocean basins.
And God said, “Let the earth sprout vegetation..‟
God makes plants on the newly formed land. The continuing expansion of space
causes the waters above the heavens to reach the event horizon and pass beyond it.
This causes the amount of matter within the event horizon to begin decreasing,
which in turn causes the event horizon to begin rapidly shrinking toward the earth.

383
 SECOND CHANCE

There are no stars yet, only clusters of hydrogen, helium, and other atoms left
behind in the expanse by the rapid expansion.
The day the universe opened, day four (Genesis 1:14-19)
And God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the
heavens.. to give light on the earth,” and it was so
The shrinking event horizon reaches earth early on the morning of the fourth day.
During this ordinary day as measured on earth, billions of years' worth of physical
processes takes place in the distant cosmos. In particular, gravity has time to make
distant clusters of hydrogen and helium more compact.
And God made the two great lights... the stars also. And God
gave them in the expanse of the heavens to give light on the
earth..
Early on the fourth morning, God coalesces the clusters of atoms into stars and
thermonuclear fusion ignites in them. The newly-formed stars find themselves
grouped together in galaxies and clusters of galaxies. As the fourth day proceeds on
earth, the more distant stars age billions of years, while their light also has the
same billions of years to travel to the earth. While the light is on its way, space
continues to expand, relativistically stretching out the light waves and shifting the
wavelengths toward the red side of the spectrum. Stars which are now the farthest
away have the greatest redshift, because the waves have been stretched the most.
This progressive redshift is exactly what is observed.
That was one quite extra-ordinary explanation, I thought to myself. Dr
Humphreys had applied a lot of imagination. I was sure that other
physicists would probably pick plenty of holes in his theories. Perhaps
many would say that it was only theoretically possible, but just absurd to
think that a God would do such a thing. I wondered why Dr Humphreys
had gone to such great lengths to use science, General Relativity in
particular, to explain how God created the universe. If there is a God,
then God could do anything.
Then I realised that Dr Humphreys had put together this possible
explanation for people like me. People who could end up dismissing the
Holy Bible just because the six days of creation seems so utterly stupid,
simply made up, by an ignorant nomad living in 1500BC in the Middle
East. After reading this book, not that I totally understood it, I realised
that you can come up with any scientific theory to support whatever you
want to believe. I was not going to study physics to a sufficient level to
disprove or prove Dr Humphreys. I was going to rely on one scientist
arguing with another scientist, and ultimately picking the scientist that
happened to agree with my world-view.
I realised that I was not going to change my world-view on the basis of
Dr Humphreys work, or any other scientist‟s work for that matter. If I
384
 CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME

really believed that the Bible was the truth then I would believe Dr
Humphreys and say what a brilliant piece of work it is. If I didn‟t believe
the Bible, then I would argue that Dr Humphreys has probably been
smoking too much dope, and that his theories are totally absurd and at
odds with the rest of the scientific community.
Abraham, by giving me this book, had shown me the extent of my own
prejudice when evaluating „scientific‟ evidence. I was beginning to realise
that it was not at all about science, evidence, facts and logic. I could
choose to disregard anything that did not agree with my own pre-
suppositions that formed my own particular world-view.
This was progress. I was beginning to see why I was confused. There
was something wrong about my pre-suppositions. I had an incorrect view
of the world. This incorrect world-view could not make sense of all the
information that I had. How was I going to correct my world-view?
I was thinking about all of this, when I suddenly realised that I had
come across a hymn in the Vedas that talked about the creation. I went to
get my copy of the Rig Veda and the notes that I had taken, when I was
talking to Professor Chandra, in Ranthambore. It was in book four of the
Rig Veda, hymn 129. I re-read it:
‗There was neither non-existence nor existence was. There was no world, no space,
nor that which is above space. What stirred? In whose protection was it all? From
where did the deep unfathomable water come from?
There was neither death nor immortality then. There was no indication of day or
night. That One, without breath, breathed out by his own impulse. Other than
that there was nothing else whatever
There was darkness covered by darkness in the beginning. This entire world was
undistinguishable water. That empty united world, which was covered by a mere
nothing, was produced through the power of heat.
In the beginning there was desire, which was the first seed of the mind. Sages
having meditated in their hearts have discovered by their wisdom the bond of the
existent with the non-existent
A ray [of light] stretched out, whether across, or below, or above? Some were
shedders of seed, others were mighty. Food was the lesser; the eater was the greater,
Who really knows? Who in this world may declare it! Whence was this creation?
Whence was it made? The gods were subsequent to the creation. So who can tell
from where it came?
Whence this creation has arisen - perhaps it formed itself, or perhaps it did not.
He who is the highest in heaven, he assuredly knows, or if he knows not (then no
one else does)‘
I went to get my Bible to read its account of creation:

385
 SECOND CHANCE

The Creation: Genesis 1:1-19

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was formless
and void, and darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was
moving over the surface of the waters. Then God said, ―Let there be light‖; and
there was light. God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from
the darkness. God called the light day and the darkness He called night. And
there was evening and there was morning, one day. Then God said, ―Let there be
an expanse in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the
waters.‖ God made the expanse, and separated the waters which were below the
expanse from the waters which were above the expanse; and it was so. God called
the expanse heaven. And there was evening and there was morning, a second day.
Then God said, ―Let the waters below the heavens be gathered into one place, and
let the dry land appear‖; and it was so. God called the dry land earth, and the
gathering of the waters He called seas; and God saw that it was good. Then God
said, ―Let the earth sprout vegetation: plants yielding seed, and fruit trees on the
earth bearing fruit after their kind with seed in them‖; and it was so. The earth
brought forth vegetation, plants yielding seed after their kind, and trees bearing
fruit with seed in them, after their kind; and God saw that it was good. There was
evening and there was morning, a third day. Then God said, ―Let there be lights
in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night, and let them be
for signs and for seasons and for days and years; and let them be for lights in the
expanse of the heavens to give light on the earth‖; and it was so. God made the two
great lights, the greater light to govern the day, and the lesser light to govern the
night; He made the stars also. God placed them in the expanse of the heavens to
give light on the earth, and to govern the day and the night, and to separate the
light from the darkness; and God saw that it was good. There was evening and
there was morning, a fourth day.
I read the Vedic account again, and then the Biblical account. I did this
a number of times. There did seem to be some similarity between them.
But the Vedas were written in India and Genesis was supposed to have
been written by Moses somewhere in the Sinai peninsula, between Egypt
and Israel. The Vedic had less detail, and was more cryptic, than the
Biblical account. How could they be so similar?
I concluded that there must be something wrong with my world-view,
with my pre-suppositions. I took out the sheet of paper that I had put
together when I was in Hyderabad and studied all the different
statements about origin, morality, destiny and purpose. What did I really
believe? What pre-suppositions did I have, that made me believe what I
believed?

386
CREATION: DISTANT STARLIGHT & TIME

387
SECOND CHANCE

388
 27 THE SPIRIT

I phoned Abraham and arranged to meet with him to return his book.
„You were right,‟ I said to Abraham when I met him, „I had made a pre-
supposition about the age of the earth and the universe being the same. I
am not an astro-physicist, but after reading this book, that you lent me, it
is possible that the earth could be a lot younger than the universe. But I
am not sure whether I am ready to believe it.‟
„Yes the Earth could be a lot younger than the rest of the universe. Of
course it is just Dr Humphreys‟ theory and we will never know whether
his theory is definitely correct. But I do believe that his theory is as valid,
as other theories for the creation of this universe, even the Big Bang
theory. It is all based on whatever, your pre-suppositions might be. And I
hope by now that you have realised that pre-suppositions creep in all the
time. Some of them can be prejudiced view points, rather than objectively
reasoned out facts.‟
„Hummm. I guess you are right,‟ I didn‟t want to tell Abraham that I
had reached the very same conclusion.
Abraham lent me some more books written by other scientists,
supporting the theory of a young earth. There were many books that re-
interpreted the fossil record as proof of there being a global flood, and
various theories that showed how a global flood could have occurred.
Other books showed how a global flood, caused in part by sub-sea
volcanoes, could have led to an ice age. The theories presented, seemed
to be no less plausible, then the theories that I had been taught at school.
I was beginning to realise how our initial pre-suppositions could radically
determine what we end up believing in. These were some of the factors
that I read about, leading some scientists to conclude that the earth is not
as old as we think it is:

389
 SECOND CHANCE

1. Galaxies wind themselves up too fast

2. Comets disintegrate too quickly (comets have typical ages
of 10,000 years, if they only last so long, why is it that we still see
them, if the universe is supposed to be billions of years old)
3. Not enough mud on the sea floor
4. Not enough sodium in the sea
5. The Earth‟s magnetic field is decaying too fast
6. Many strata are too tightly bent
7. Injected sandstone shortens geologic „ages‟
8. Fossil radioactivity (Polonium -210 radio halos ) shortens
geologic „ages‟ to a few years
9. Helium in the wrong places
10. Not enough Stone Age skeletons
11. Agriculture is too recent
12. History is too short

I hadn‟t realised that there was so much controversy over the age of the
earth, and that there were many physical factors that were contrary to the
belief that the earth was billions of years old.
If I thought that the earth was billions of years old, then I would
continue to develop theories that had this as an assumption. I had also
read very different theories, thanks to Abraham, that assumed that the
earth was 6-7,000 years old. Each theory seemed to make sense of the
facts as they saw them. But which one was true? I continued meeting
with Abraham once a week to discuss whatever book he had given me.
On one of those occasions I raised the point that Ravi had made about
an absolute moral law, and Roshan‟s definition of sin and being a sinner.
I wanted to know what Abraham thought about all those things.
„My dear Arjuna,‟ replied Abraham, „you have raised a very good
question. The way in which you consider and frame this question
determines what kind of God you end up believing in.‟
„Yes I believe that is so. But I want to know your views on this
question.‟
„There have been times when I have done things which I wish I had
not. I have felt very miserable and disappointed with myself, for doing
those things, which, even at the time, I had felt were wrong. I have to ask
myself why did I feel that it was wrong and what was it inside of me that
was telling me that it was wrong? It is as if there are two people inside of
me arguing with one another. I find this passage written in the book of
Romans by the apostle Paul, quite illuminating,‟ Abraham went to the
book shelf to get a copy of the bible, „yes here it is, Romans chapter 7,
verses 15 to 25:

390
 THE SPIRIT

―I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I
hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As
it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that
nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do
what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do;
no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not
want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I
find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in
my inner being I delight in God‘s law; but I see another law at work in the
members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a
prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I
am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God—through
Jesus Christ our Lord!‖
„The apostle Paul is describing himself struggling with Sin,‟ continued
Abraham, „as if it is another person that he is battling, to do what is right.‟
„But do you believe in what is written in the Bible, about us being
sinners?‟ I asked.
„Arjuna, it does not matter what I believe in. You should make up your
own mind, do you want to believe the account that Paul has given, does it
describe what you have gone through? Does this statement pass the tests
of correspondence and coherence? Only you can answer that question,
because only you can verify whether what I have read from the Bible
corresponds with your own personal experience, and only you can decide
whether these statements are coherent and make sense to you. It does not
matter what I think, it is for you to decide.‟
I had gotten used to this response. I could never draw Abraham out on
what he specifically thought. He would quote from the Bible, from the
Qur‟an, from the Gita and from the Dhamapada. Each time he would ask
what I thought.
„But what does it say in the other scriptures regarding this issue, is there
anything similar?‟ I asked.
„This is mentioned in the other scriptures,‟ replied Abraham, „however,
the treatment is slightly different, see if you can tell the similarities and
the differences. This is what the Bhagavad Gita has to say about this
topic:
2:62While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for
them, and from such attachment lust develops, and from lust anger arises.
2:63 from anger, delusion arises, and from delusion bewilderment of memory.
When memory is bewildered, intelligence is lost, and when intelligence is lost, one
falls down again into the material pool.

391
 SECOND CHANCE

2:64 One who can control his senses by practicing the regulated principles of
freedom can obtain the complete mercy of the Lord and thus become free from all
attachment and aversion.
3:37 The Blessed Lord said: It is lust only, Arjuna, which is born of contact with
the material modes of passion and later transformed into wrath, and which is the
all-devouring, sinful enemy of this world.
As fire is covered by smoke, as a mirror is covered by dust, or as the embryo is
covered by the womb, similarly, the living entity is covered by different degrees of this
lust.
Thus, a man's pure consciousness is covered by his eternal enemy in the form of
lust, which is never satisfied and which burns like fire.
4:16 Even the intelligent are bewildered in determining what is action and what is
inaction. Now I shall explain to you what action is, knowing which you shall be
liberated from all sins.
4:17The intricacies of action are very hard to understand. Therefore one should
know properly what action is, what forbidden action is, and what inaction is.
4:18 One who sees inaction in action, and action in inaction, is intelligent among
men, and he is in the transcendental position, although engaged in all sorts of
activities.
„What do you think about what it says in the Gita?‟ asked Abraham.
I thought for a while, and said, „Well the Gita describes the process very
well, the way in which you get caught up in your thoughts from
attachment to lust, from lust to anger, and so on. However, it seems to
indicate that this chain reaction is inevitable, that people caught up in this
chain reaction may not realise it, and that you are to resist it. Whilst in
Paul‟s account in Romans, it is saying that there is a struggle that is taking
place, you are aware of it, and that despite your attempts to defeat it, it
ultimately defeats you, that you cannot defeat it on your own and you
need Jesus Christ to help you.‟
„Very good Arjuna,‟ said Abraham, smiling encouragingly at me, „I
would have said the same. Now I will tell you what Buddha says about
this subject in the Dhamapada:
He who keeps his mind on pleasant objects, who is uncontrolled in his senses,
immoderate in his food, and is lazy and lacking in energy, will certainly be
overwhelmed by Mara(evil), just as stormy winds uproot a weak tree.
He who keeps his mind on the impurities (of the body), who is well-controlled in
his senses, and is full of faith and energy, will certainly be not overwhelmed by Mara,
just as stormy winds cannot shake a mountain of rock.

392
 THE SPIRIT

They take untruth for truth; they take truth for untruth; such persons can never
arrive at the truth, for they hold wrong views.
They take truth for truth; they take untruth for untruth; such persons arrive at the
truth, for they hold right views.
Just as rain penetrates a badly-roofed house, so also, passion (raga) penetrates a
mind not cultivated in Tranquillity and Insight Development (Samatha and
Vipassana).
Just as rain cannot penetrate a well-roofed house, so also, passion (raga) cannot
penetrate a mind well-cultivated in Tranquillity and Insight Development (Samatha
and Vipassana).
Here he grieves, hereafter he grieves; the evil-doer grieves in both existences. He
grieves and he suffers anguish when he sees the depravity of his own deeds.
If a person is energetic, mindful, pure in his thought, word and deed, and if he
does everything with care and consideration, restrains his senses, earns his living
according to the Law (Dhamma), and, is not unheedful, then, the fame and fortune
of the mindful person steadily increase.
Therefore one should not be negligent, nor be addicted to sensual pleasures; for he who
is established in mindfulness, through cultivation of Tranquillity and Insight
Development Practice, experiences supreme happiness (i.e., realizes Nibbana).
The mind is difficult to control; swiftly and lightly it moves and lands wherever it
pleases. It is good to tame the mind, for a well-tamed mind brings happiness.
The mind is difficult to see, very delicate and subtle; it moves and lands wherever it
pleases. The wise one should guard his mind, for a guarded mind brings happiness.
The mind wanders far and moves about alone; it is non-material; it lies in the cave
(chamber of the heart). Those who control their mind will be free from the bonds of Mara.
If a man's mind is unsteady, if he is ignorant of the true Dhamma, and if his faith is
wavering, then his knowledge will never be perfect.
If a man's mind is free from passion, if he is free from ill will, if he has abandoned
both good and evil, and if he is vigilant, for such a man there is no danger.
„So what did you think of Buddha‟s treatment?‟ asked Abraham.
„It seems to have bits of the Bible and bits of the Gita,‟ I replied, „a bit
of the Bible in that it describes a law, the law of dharma. But then this
contradicts one of the primary teachings of Buddha that there is no God,
if there is no personal God, then how can there be an absolute law of
dharma? Surely there has to be someone, or something personal that has
set the law in the first place, which also determines the extent to which
393
 SECOND CHANCE

you obey or disobey the law. Hasn‟t Buddha contradicted himself? Hasn‟t
he mixed up his concepts, so that they are no longer coherent?‟
„Very good, Arjuna,‟ replied Abraham, „you are very perceptive. Many
Buddhists will say that there is no need to have a personal God for the
law of dharma to exist. I would say that if you were to take the
proposition that there is an absolute moral law of dharma out there, then
one should logically conclude that someone or something personal may
have created those moral laws, as morality is all about interactions
between people which make it personal. A Buddhist may counteract this
argument by saying that the laws of logic that I am applying, do not apply
in this case. Again, I believe that they are on shaky grounds, because for
them to make this argument, they are in effect using the laws of logic and
non-contradiction. Just keep on thinking through the implications of
every statement that is made in each of the scriptures, determine the pre-
suppositions that they have assumed in making those statements, check
for coherence and correspondence. This simple process will help you
determine which statements are reasonable, and those statements that are
not reasonable.‟
„The way that you describe it, it seems an easy task to do. But, I suspect
that it is not going to be as easy, as you say,‟ I replied. Abraham gave me
a bemused look.
We continued to have these kinds of conversations, several times a
week. I tried to apply the rules that Abraham had given, but it wasn‟t so
easy to be logically rigorous. It seemed that you needed to know the
answer, the truth, before hand, and then work backwards to disprove any
statements that did not agree with what you had already decided. I began
to realise that perhaps this way of logic, was just a way of attacking
beliefs. It was not really helping me to really know what was true. All I
discovered was that the different religious texts were very, very different,
in their pre-suppositions and beliefs. Superficially they looked the same,
but deep down they were fundamentally different. After a month, I told
Abraham that all of our conversations were useful, but they weren‟t really
helping me to make any more sense of what the ultimate truth might be.
„Arjuna, I am not sure what else to say to help you make sense of all of
this,‟ replied Abraham, „but, I do want to share with you one more thing
today, which has helped me make sense of what has happened and is
happening in my own life.‟ Abraham went to the large bookcase, that was
in his library, and from the top shelf pulled down a tattered brown leather
book, and then sat down, leafing through the book. He had converted
one of his bedrooms into a library. There were bookshelves on each of
the walls, from the floor to the ceiling. In the middle of the room was a
rug, a small table and two armchairs. All the bookshelves were full of
books, and there were half a dozen piles of books stacked three to four

394
 THE SPIRIT

feet high all over the floor of the room. It looked like chaos, but
Abraham seemed to know where every book was kept.
„This book is by Joseph Hazzaya,‟ said Abraham, „he is one of the great
Syrian theologians, wedding together what is so frequently kept poles
apart – dynamic spiritual experience, and speculative understanding. It is
the very same thing that you are trying to piece together,‟ Abraham
continued, still leafing through the book.
„As a monk, he was known as „Abdisho‟, „The Seer‟. The details of his
life are unclear; he lived through the turn of the eighth century. In this
Book of Questions,‟ Abraham momentarily lifted up the book that he
was holding.
He continued. „He addresses the following issues: How the Spirit which
works in us is known, how His power is revealed, and what is the sign by
which the Spirit makes manifest His working in us. Hazzaya wrote this
book in the eighth century. Ah, here it is, this is what I was looking for.
This is what Hazzaya writes about the Spirit, and how you can tell
whether you have the true Spirit of God working inside of you. Let me
read it to you it is from Early Christian Mystics by Alphonse Mirgana:
‗The first sign of the effective working of the Spirit is when the love of God burns
in the heart of a man like fire…
The second sign, through which you will feel that the Spirit which you received from
baptism is working in you, consists in true humility being born in your soul… It is
from humility that peace, meekness and endurance of tribulations are born in the
soul.
The third sign of the working of the Spirit in you consists in the compassion which
represents within you the image of God, through which, when your thoughts extend
to all men, tears flow from your eyes like fountains of water, as if all men were
dwelling in your heart, and you affectionately embrace them and kiss them, while
you pour your kindness on all. When you remember them, your heart is kindled
with the power of the working of the Spirit in you as with fire, and from this,
goodness and kindness are born in your heart.
The fourth sign of the working of the Spirit which you received in baptism consists
in the illumined vision of your mind. It is this vision that receives the light of the
Holy Trinity. From this you will derive a flow of spiritual speech and the
knowledge of both worlds: of the one that has passed and the one that shall pass,
and also a consciousness of the mysteries of future things, the fine sounds of the
spiritual intelligences: joy, jubilation, exultation, glorification, songs, hymns, and
odes of magnification.
The above are the signs, which if you find in yourself, you will know that the Holy
Spirit, which you received from the holy baptism, is working in you.‘

395
 SECOND CHANCE

„Wow, I wish I had come across this earlier. It would have saved me a
lot of time in trying to work it out myself.‟
„Maybe, but perhaps if you had read it earlier you may not have
appreciated it as much as you do now.‟
„Did you notice anything about what I have just read?‟ asked Abraham.
I thought for a while and then it dawned on me.
„There is nothing specifically about Jesus Christ or any religion in what
Haazaya was writing about. Yet it seemed absolutely correct and fits in
with all of what I have experienced and found out about others‟ beliefs.
Off course he mentions Holy Baptism, which refers to a second birth. It‟s
about humility, love for others, wisdom, concerning the nature of the
universe and the people in it, and finally love of the Creator/supreme
spirit. But I know that in Hinduism there is a concept of being twice born
for the Brahmins and Kshyatrias but there is no baptism and no change.‟
„Yes you‟ve summed it up well,‟ said Abraham in nodding agreement.
„I can see that the ideals and aspirations of Hinduism, Islam, Buddhism,
Judaism, and Christianity are essentially the same if you boil it down to
these four things. Buddhism may have an issue with the supreme spirit
having a personality, but they would agree that there is some supreme
spirit out there. The only ones I am not sure about are atheists. They
would agree with the first three, and I guess the extent to which they
agree or disagree about love for a supreme spirit will be the degree to
which they believe that there is nothing transcendent above this material
existence – and that probably varies from individual to individual.‟
„Maybe. But you are making another pre-supposition that all of these
religions regard love in the same way. You see the word love that is used
by Jesus, as written in the New Testament, is the Greek word agape.
There is no equivalent English translation for that word. In fact there are
four different Greek words that are found in the Bible, all of which could
be translated into the one English word, love or desire. But they do not
mean the same thing, and what Jesus meant by the word agape, is not the
love that you and I would commonly understand.‟
„What do you mean?‟
„Let me illustrate it for you. There are four Greek words, epithymia,
eros, phileo and agape, all of which can be translated into love/desire.
But they have very different meanings. At one extreme you have
epithymia and at the other extreme you have agape. Let me draw it out
for you.‟ Abraham took a piece of paper and sketched the following:

396
 THE SPIRIT

„You see epithymia describes carnal lust, a craving, it is completely

selfish, and it is about domination. It is the „love‟ that a man going to see
a strip show, or visiting a brothel, or a paedophile taking pictures of
children would experience. It is not really „love‟ at all. When a person
feels this kind of emotion they can quite easily go out of control, it can
become an obsession which could lead to rape, violence, murder and
other such acts. The next two are eros and phileo. Both of these loves are
mutual and reciprocal. Eros is a romantic love, a boy „erosses‟ and the girl
„erosses‟ the boy back, it is a physical attraction. The third word, phileo,
represents an attraction that one may have with someone who thinks
similarly, it is commonly known as brotherly love. Once again it is
mutual. The final word, agape, is a description of the love that Jesus was
talking about. It is a selfless love. Jesus was not expecting anyone to love
him back the way that he loved us. It was because Jesus had agape for
mankind that he allowed himself to be crucified. No other religion has
this form of love, because in no other religion has the god of that
religion, freely sacrificed themselves for mankind. The love that is talked
about in religions, other than Christianity, is primarily phileo love, which
is brotherly love.‟
„I never knew that‟, I replied. I wondered how I could verify whether
this was true. I had never come across this kind of explanation for the
difference between Christ‟s love and other loves.
„There is also another point‟, continued Abraham, „Love of the Creator,
love of others, humility and wisdom are the goals of all religions and I am
sure that all of the different religious leaders would agree with you.
However, you have to understand that the path that each of the religions
propose, as to how to achieve these four ultimate goals are quite
different.‟
„How would you summarise the differences, Abraham?‟ I asked.
„This is difficult as each of the religions is complex and subtle. I will
attempt to answer the impossible. You have enough knowledge and
experience to make up your own mind. My view is that Islam is about
fear of Allah, their creator, obeying his commands and doing good works.
397
 SECOND CHANCE

As long as you follow the five pillars of Islam (declare Allah is God,
perform a pilgrimage, fast during Ramadan, pray five times a day and give
ten percent of your income to the poor) you will, in all likelihood, be
judged favourably by Allah and make it to heaven. Judaism is about
following the Law as handed down to Moses in the Ten Commandments.
If you fail to keep the law you are required to bring some form of
sacrifice to expunge yourself from the consequences (usually death) of
not keeping to the law, so in Judaism there is immediate judgment and a
remedy for the judgement provided that you admit your transgression of
the law and perform the sacrifice. If there is no confession of guilt then
there are dire consequences as God (YHWH, Jehovah, Adoni) will bring
his judgement down on you. There is a split in Judaism about whether or
not there is an afterlife. Buddhism is about surrendering to the Supreme
Spirit and letting go of your ego through following the middle path, the
only consequences of not keeping to the path is that you will be
reincarnated in a new life.
Hinduism can be difficult to summarise. In essence, what it says is that
you have to perform yoga, a process by which your jiva atma, life spirit, is
joined „yug‟, with the parama atma, the supreme spirit. There are many
forms of yoga some of which are: bhakti „worship‟, karma „good works‟,
hatha „physical discipline‟, gnyan „knowledge and meditation‟. You can
concentrate on one of these or some even do them in combination. An
individual has to perform the yoga by themselves and ideally should find
a guru to guide them in their chosen yoga. If you are unable to „yug‟, join,
yourself to the supreme spirit then the only consequences are that you
will be reincarnated and have the chance to „yug‟ yourself in the next life.
You have an unlimited number of chances as in Buddhism.
Christianity is equally as difficult to summarise as Hinduism as there are
so many variations in how it is practiced and the plethora of ways in
which different denominations choose to interpret the Bible. Some of the
ways in which it is practiced looks no different from Islam, fear of the
Lord and good works. Roman Catholics believe that they will go to
heaven as long as they are members of the Roman Catholic Church and
continue to confess all their sins to their local priest. Evangelical
protestants would say that it is impossible for any man to ever make it to
heaven because everyone is a sinner that deserves to go to Hell. However,
Jesus Christ gave himself as a willing substitutional sacrifice, bearing all of
mankind‟s sins, so that anyone who believes in this atoning sacrifice and
is ready to follow Jesus Christ will go to heaven. This on the face of it
looks very similar to Bhakti Yoga of ISKON where you have to believe
in Krishna (instead of Jesus), but it is quite different, as Bhakti Yoga says
focus on Krishna, where as evangelicals emphasise the need to accept
that you are a sinner and the atoning sacrifice and resurrection of Jesus.
Krishna made no such sacrifice for mankind. Pentecostals and
398
 THE SPIRIT

Charismatics not only emphasise the need to believe in Jesus Christ‟s

atoninhg sacrifice but that it necessary to be baptised by the Holy Spirit
and have it residing inside you to teach and ensure that you keep God‟s
commandments, the Holy Spirit acts as a perfect Guru. Some of them
would further add that the only way you can be sure that the Holy Spirit
is with you is through some visible and/or audible manifestation,
otherwise you are being deluded. However, all Christians believe that you
only have this one life on earth and then at some point you will be judged
by Jesus by what you have done. Jesus will be the sole arbiter as to
whether or not you spend eternity in Heaven or eternity suffering in Hell.
The biggest differences amongst the religions are the processes that
they advocate for being a good person, the definition of being a good
person, the criteria and method by which goodness is judged and the
consequences of not meeting the mark are very different. They cannot all
be correct, they may however all be wrong, or one may be correct and the
others wrong.”
„So they are different. Hinduism, Islam, Buddhism and Judaism relying
on the individual doing something. Whereas Pentecostal and
Charismatics say that you need the Holy Spirit, kind of like a super Guru
who stays inside of you, to continue to guide you on the true path to
God,‟ I replied.
„Yes that is correct. But be assured that a Hindu practicing Bhakti yoga,
or Hathi or Gnyan yoga would say that they have felt the „spirit‟, a Suffi
Islamist, a Buddhist, a Methodist, a Charismatic and a Pentecostal. All of
them, at least those that are practicing, would say that they have felt the
spiritual force and that is why they believe, and are continuing to practice
believing with faith that they are on the right true path. Arjuna, you need
to ask yourself can they all be on the same path? Are they really all feeling
the same spirit? Do all the spirits serve the same function?‟
„Well I don‟t know. I definitely felt something spiritual when I was
doing Reiki, and then the experience with Transcendental Meditation, as
well as with Yoga Nidra. Then again I felt something at Roshan‟s church
service. They were spiritual, but each was different in how it made me
feel. I am not sure whether it was purely a function of how I was at the
time or whether they were really different spirits. I know that this chap
Dharmendra that I met in Mumbai was convinced that he had been
dabbling with the false spirit when he was doing Reiki, but I find it hard
to believe how he can be so sure. I am still thinking about it and finding it
extremely difficult to know whether or not what I was feeling was the
same spirit, let alone make any kind of judgement as to whether they were
false or true. What do you think, how am I really suppose to know which
one is true if any?‟
„Objectively and logically I do not know the answer. Because I have not
felt what it is like to be a true Muslim, and a true Buddhist, and a true
399
 SECOND CHANCE

Christian, and a true Hindu, and a true Jew so I have no way of

objectively comparing them. Nor does anyone else have that objective
experience to logically and objectively to say that they are the same or the
different.
Just because something is not logically provable to be true does not
mean that it is not true. A German mathematician, Gödel, proved this in
his “Incompleteness Theorem”, where he proved that a statement could
be absolutely true, but not provable to be true. You see, a religion can be
true, but not logically provable to be true. I believe that God deliberately
set this up, so that you would ultimately need faith to believe in Him and
the way to Him. Pascal, another French mathematician and philosopher,
summed it up by saying,” Abraham got up and took a book from one of
the top shelves, opened it and then resumed speaking whilst thumbing
through the pages, “sorry, I want to quote you Pascal‟s words exactly it is
from his Pensees. Here it is:
‗God has willed to hide Himself: If there were only one religion, God would indeed
be manifest. The same would be the case if there were no martyrs but in our
religion.
God being thus hidden, every religion which does not affirm that God is hidden is
not true; and every religion which does not give the reason of it is not instructive.
Our religion does all this: Vere to es Deus absconditus.'
If there were no obscurity, man would not know of his corruption; if there were no
light, man would not hope for a remedy. Thus, it is not only fair, but
advantageous to us, that God be partly hidden and partly revealed; since it is
equally dangerous to man to know God without knowing his own wretchedness,
and to know his own wretchedness without knowing God.‘
Both Buddhism and Hinduism say that God is everywhere and is not
obscure, you do not need to find Him, He is right there with you.
However, in the opening words of John‟s gospel in the bible it says:
‗In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was
God. He was in the beginning with God. All things came into being through Him,
and apart from Him nothing came into being that has come into being. In Him was
life, and the life was the Light of men. The Light shines in the darkness, and the
darkness did not comprehend it.‘
If there was no obscurity then Jesus would not have said “Seek and you
will find”, if there is a need to seek, then clearly there is some obscurity.
Either we are in darkness or we are in the light, we cannot be in both.”
„So Abraham, it seems that you have it all worked out which one is the
right way what would you advise me to do?‟ I asked.
„I am not going to be drawn so easily in giving you my view. It does not
matter what I believe. It only matters what you believe, which you know
400
 THE SPIRIT

and I know is not a function of what I happen to think. I cannot advise

you what to do. If there is a God and if you are truly searching for him I
would have thought that he would make himself known to you. Then you
will have to ask God to help you work out what is right and wrong,
whether there are many ways or only one way.‟
„Is that it? Can‟t you tell me what you believe in? Is there no other
guidance?‟ I asked, quite a bit frustrated at this rather elusive answer.
There was a long pause. Abraham got up slowly and put the Book of
Questions away and then sat down.
„Well there is one thing that you could do. But it really depends whether
you have faith in what I am going to suggest.‟
„What‟s that?‟
„You could say this prayer. Perhaps it will be answered, perhaps not.‟
„What prayer?‟
„You may want to try this say out loud:
The true and living God, the creator of this universe, I truly want
to know who you are with all my heart. Please reveal to me who
you are and how I can get to know you, know my purpose and
destiny in this life.
You may get an answer in which case he will tell you whether there are
really many paths or only one true path. Or he may not give you an
answer in which case you might conclude that your friend Martin has
been right all along and there really is no God out there just a figment of
people‟s fanciful imaginations and their rationalisations for the
inexplicable.‟
„Have you tried this prayer did it work?‟
„Yes I have and that is why I am telling you. But you have to really
mean the prayer, and be ready to accept whatever answer you get. Before
you ask; I am not going to tell you whether or not I received an answer,
nor discuss the content or nature of the answer, assuming that I received
one.‟
„Why not?‟
„My dear Arjuna. Have you not realised yet that I would be simply
sharing my own experience and opinion. It will not make an iota of a
difference to your beliefs. You have the knowledge and you are
intelligent, you have experienced a great deal of things, yet you cannot
make up your mind. My telling you what I experienced will only add to
the muddle that you already have. Only the creator of this universe, if he
were to exist, has the power to unravel it for you. If you are earnest for
your search for truth then you will make this prayer with all your heart
and I am sure that you will get an answer. But you must be prepared for
the answer, it may surprise you. The Creator God, assuming that he
exists, would know whether or not you were truly earnest in your quest
401
 SECOND CHANCE

for an answer, and ready for the consequences. If he believes that you are
not truly earnest, and you are simply looking for a „rubber stamp‟
approval for what you already believe, then I doubt whether he will
answer your request.‟
„I am not sure whether what you are suggesting will work.‟
„Maybe it will, maybe not. I don‟t know what is in your heart and I
don‟t know how the Creator, assuming that he exists, will respond to you.
You choose what to do.‟
„My choice?‟
„Yes this is your second chance.‟
„Why is it my second chance and what are you talking about chance and
all that?‟
„Well your first chance at finding about the truth was based on you
using your own intelligence to work it out. It‟s a chance, because you may
stumble upon unravelling the complexity of the universe, something
which the most intelligent philosophers of our time have been
contemplating for the last four thousand plus years – I think that if you
got to the answer it would only have been a matter of chance. This is
your second chance, the chance that the Creator will listen to your
request and give you an answer. Maybe he will, maybe he will not. It‟s a
chance that you will have to take. You lucked out on your first chance,
relying on your intelligence.‟
„Okay I can see that it might be my second chance. I‟ll try out the prayer
and let you know what answer I get.‟
„That‟s your choice. Good luck with your second chance.‟
With that I shook Abraham‟s hand and left wondering when would be
the best time to pray

402
 28 THE TWO KEYS

That same evening as the sun was setting I decided to say the prayer.
Rita had gone out and I felt that something like this had to be done in
private. I went down on my knees in anticipation that I would get an
answer from the Creator. I had faith that I would receive some sort of
answer. Not sure who would respond. Nothing happened.
Nothing continued to happen over the next several days. Either the
prayer was bogus, or I was not saying it properly or the really wasn‟t a
Creator God up there. I found the last option the least appealing and
least believable after all the things I had been through.
I looked back at all that happened in the last months, and reflected on
the conversations with Roshan, Samson, Dev, Anand, Shakir, Krishna
and above all with Abraham. Roshan and Samson had impressed me the
most as they had both quoted from the Bible the same responses to my
questions. They were trying for the most part to let the Bible answer
directly, rather than them. This seemed to make sense that if there was a
Creator up there then surely he would have given us a manual of some
kind. But then which of the holy books is the manual? The Torah, or the
whole Bible, or is it the Holy Qur‟an or is it the Bhagavad Gita. The Bible
stood out from the rest because of the number of prophecies, otherwise
it was difficult to tell which one of the books was the total truth.
There were some niggling things about Christianity which disturbed me.
I wondered whether to ask Roshan, or Samson. In the end I decided to
ask Abraham his view. He seemed to be the most balanced and seemed
to know more about the other religions than either Samson or Roshan;
both of whom appeared to be quite blinkered on their outlook.
Abraham was at home, he was reading one of his many books.
„So Arjuna, have you had an answer to your prayer yet?‟
„No I haven‟t. Is this what I was supposed to say?‟ I handed him a piece
of paper with the prayer written on it.

403
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes that is the right prayer. Be patient, there are many ways that God
talks to us; sometimes in dreams, sometimes directly, sometimes through
things that we read and sometimes through other people. There are even
times when he doesn‟t give an answer but puts certain questions in our
head, which help us get to the answer,‟ replied Abraham.
I sat down on one of the armchairs. I had gotten quite comfortable and
relaxed in his home.
„Would you like a cup of tea or something?‟ asked Abraham.
„No I‟m okay.‟
„Very well. Would you mind if I have my tea?‟ said Abraham, smiling at
me.
„Well if you are going to have a cup of tea then it would be rude if I
didn‟t join you.‟ I smiled back.
„I knew that I could tempt you,‟ laughed Abraham.
Abraham asked his helper to make two cups of tea and bring some
snacks. We sat for a while talking about inconsequential things. The tea
arrived, together with some fried somosas, triangular pastries with
vegetable and meat filling.
„Please help yourself,‟ said Abraham.
„These are delicious,‟ I said.
Abraham sat in silence, as if he was expecting me to say something.
Eventually, I spoke.
„Some questions did come into my mind. But I am not sure whether
you are the right person to answer them,‟ I spoke hesitantly.
„Well you can ask. If I don‟t know I will tell you. Besides if you don‟t
like my response you can always ask somebody else. I will not be
offended,‟ replied Abraham in his usual soft and calm tones.
„Okay. There are some things about Christianity that are bugging me. I
could have asked Roshan and Samson, Christians that I know and they
should know the best, but then you seemed to have a much more
rounded perspective on all of the religions.‟
„Well, thank you for your compliments. You can and should always ask
those that know the most about the subject matter and you can always
ask Roshan and Samson for their views as well as mine.‟
„I think I will do that.‟
„What are the things that are „bugging you‟?‟ asked Abraham.
„The first is that I was really impressed with Roshan and Samson. But
my experience with other Christians has been very disappointing. Out of
all the different religious groups they seem to be the most hypocritical,
most lax in their moral standards and historically they have been
extremely hostile and argumentative to other religions; in their crusades,
forced conversion in Latin America and in India, slave trade and in their
persecution of Jews. But Roshan and Samson are so different and the
404
 THE TWO KEYS

people going to their churches seem so different. I am not sure what to

make of it.‟
„Arjuna, this is a very important issue and you are in danger of falling
into the trap that most of us fall into.‟
„What trap is that?‟ I asked.
„You are confusing Christianity with Churchianity‟ Said Abraham.
„Churchianity?‟ now I really was confused.
„Yes Churchianity. Churchianity is going to Church, and confusing that
action with actually being a Christian and following the teachings of
Christ. Churchianity is where you follow the teachings of the Pastor,
Padre, the Bishop or the Pope and put what they say ahead of what Jesus
said in the Bible. You spend more time with what they have to say than
with what God is saying. If they are teaching and behaving exactly as
advocating by Jesus then Christianity and Churchianity are the same, but
unless the person on the pulpit is exactly like Jesus then there will always
be a difference between what comes from the pulpit and what is in the
bible. As soon as there is human intervention there is distortion,
sometimes minimal, sometimes quite significant. By the same token do
not confuse Mosqueism with Islam, you could be regularly going to the
mosque and praying five times a day on auto pilot and have no
connection with Allah. You could be too focussed on what the Imam, or
the Ayatollah, or what Osama bin Laden has to say, rather than focussing
on what the Holy Qur‟an is saying. Off course one has to rely on
interpretation, and it may be that an Imam or Pope has a correct
understanding but what if one Imam disagrees with another Imam? Or
the current Pope disagrees with a previous Pope? Or one pastor
disagreeing with another pastor? God is one, he does not disagree with
himself, it is hard to believe that a schizophrenic God could have created
the universe. So you have to conclude that both Popes, or both Imams,
or both Pastors cannot be right. Either one is right and the other is
wrong, or they are both wrong. I believe that God wants us to make our
own minds up. Otherwise why would God have bothered with giving us
all access to the Holy Bible, Holy Qur‟an, and the Bhagvad Gita and so
on, if he didn‟t want us to read it for ourselves and come to our own
conclusions? Clearly we should listen to those that are more experienced,
but ultimately each of us have to come to our own conclusion and take
personal responsibility for what we believe.‟
„I think I‟m beginning to understand what you are saying. I need to
work it out for myself, rather than rely on what people are doing or
saying. It is my responsibility to really understand what it is, that I choose
to believe in.‟
„Exactly! You really have to ask yourself Arjuna to whether Roshan and
Samson are the typical Christians or the other Christians that you know.
Are Roshan and Samson following the teachings of the Holy Bible or are
405
 SECOND CHANCE

the other people that you know following Christianity. Who is a

Churchian and who is a Christian – that is what you need to determine.
In every religion you will see the same problem, people will say that
they are Buddhist or follow Islam but they may never or hardly go to a
temple or a mosque and may not follow any of the teachings of Buddha
or Mohammed and yet say that they are followers of that religion. If I
were you, I would concentrate on what the writings say in terms of how
you should behave and what they say about the world and God rather
than how different people behave. You will find it very difficult to make a
choice about any particular belief system based on judging how people
practice it. Not all Buddhists, Christians nor all Muslims or Jews or
Hindus are all good or all bad. There will be some good and some bad or
a lot of bad and some good. You need to focus and evaluate the belief
systems rather than judge the people.‟
„But surely the way that people behave is a function of their belief
system! If I do not like the way that most Christians behave then surely
that is the surest test of their belief system. If I don‟t like Churchianity
then what is the point of becoming a Christian? This is what troubles me
the most. All the things that Roshan, Samson and Ravi Zacharias said
seemed very compelling. The fact that they relied on the Bible to respond
to my questions impressed me. The story of Jesus is so extraordinary, a
God taking human form as an ordinary carpenter in a small town with a
lousy reputation; very unlike Hindu Gods taking birth as Princes and
Kings. Then the strangest life, complete obscurity for 30 odd years, three
years preaching and then allowing to be killed in a most brutal manner
and then coming back to life in three days – an unbelievable story. I
know that it is without parallel and in some ways the fact that it is so
beyond my imagination that in itself is enough to make me belief it. Yet
the fact remains that most of the Christians I have come across are not
the kind of people that I would want to associate with.‟
„You are entirely correct Arjuna when you say that someone‟s belief
system ultimately determines the way that they behave. The problem with
Christianity is that it is very complex. The Holy Bible is a very large and
complex document. I believe that a true Christian is one that follows the
whole of the Holy Bible, who is aware and has understood the contents
of all 66 books in the Bible. You have to ask yourself to what extent are
Roshan and Samson following the entire Bible versus the other Christians
that you know. If you feel that the other Christians you know are closer
to the teachings in the Bible than Roshan and Samson yet you do not like
them, then it would be fair and logical to conclude that there may be
something wrong with the belief set in the Bible.‟
„No, that does not seem to be the case. I feel that Roshan and Samson
are quite close to following the teachings in the bible, a lot more so than
the other Christians that I know.‟
406
 THE TWO KEYS

„Well if that is what you have observed and feel then you should try and
put aside your experiences with Christians that you have not liked.
Instead focus on the teachings of the Bible.‟
„That seems to make sense. But there again I have some issues. I can‟t
get away from the fact that according to the Bible, Jesus has seen Heaven
and Hell and has come back to tell us what it is all about. Yet to accept all
of Jesus teachings create significant problems for me.‟
„What problems does it create?‟ asked Abraham.
„Well the first problem is that Jesus claims exclusivity.‟
„Actually I said that most Christians would claim exclusivity and then I
quoted that passage. There is an alternative interpretation of that saying.
It has often been quoted to me by many evangelical Christians who
believe that I am following some mistaken false God and that my soul
will be eternally damned. Let me see if I can find that passage.‟ Abraham
got out of his chair and picked up a copy of the Bible from his bookshelf.
I noticed that he had a copy of the Holy Qur‟an, The Book of Mormon,
The Bhagvad Gita and other books, the titles of which I could not make
out.
„Here it is, John 14 verse 6, it says Jesus answered,
―I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except
through me.”‟
„Yes that passage makes my blood boil, it makes me so angry, to think
that if this is correct then my Grandparents and most of the people living
in places like India which are not Christian are all going to Hell according
to the Bible. I doubt whether anyone told my grandfather about Jesus. He
was a good man and helped many poor people and led and upright life,
yet he didn‟t know Jesus. How can a fair and just God allow this to
happen? I cannot believe that God is so unjust, this makes me discount
what Roshan and Samson tell me and therefore reject the Bible.‟
„I understand what you are saying and I feel the same way if you
interpret that verse in that way. The verse does not say that you have to
believe in Jesus otherwise you are lost. It cannot possibly mean that.‟
„What do you mean that it cannot possibly mean that? It is pretty clear
that this verse means exactly that and I know that is what Roshan and
Samson believe,‟ I replied.
„It cannot mean what Roshan and Samson believe because quite simply
Jesus Christ was only on earth two thousand years ago. If I were to ask
Roshan and Samson whether Abraham and Moses, Elijah and Enoch
would be in Heaven they would both say yes. Yet all four of these people
were unaware of Jesus and the name Jesus Christ because they were born
many years, some of them three thousand years before Jesus was on
earth. So if we were to take this passage literally as do most Christians
then we would have to conclude that everyone mentioned in the Old
407
 SECOND CHANCE

Testament is in Hell because they did not know about Jesus – they could
not have known about Jesus Christ. But these same Christians will tell
you that what you are saying is preposterous.‟
„Who are Elijah and Enoch?‟ I asked. I had not heard their names.
„They are the names of two people in the old testament that were taken
away by God into Heaven before they died on earth – so they are without
doubt with God but Elijah was born around 800BC and Enoch around
3000BC.‟
„That‟s a very good point. I hadn‟t thought of that. So what does that
verse mean?‟
„To understand this verse you need to have an understanding of the
Book of Revelations, which is very difficult book to understand and most
people tend to not read it or give up on it. It is right at the end of the
Book of Revelations in Chapter 20 and in chapter 22. Let me read them
to you,‟ Abraham flicked to the appropriate place in the Bible and started
to read.
‗Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. Earth and sky
fled from his presence, and there was no place for them. And I saw the dead, great
and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was
opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had
done as recorded in the books. The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death
and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged
according to what he had done. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake
of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. If anyone‘s name was not found written
in the book of like, he was thrown into the lake of fire.‘
Then in chapter 22, verses 12 to 16 it says:
‗Behold, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone
according to what he has done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the
Last, the Beginning and the End. Blessed are those who wash their robes, that
they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city.
Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the
murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood. I, Jesus,
have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and
the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star.‘
“I can see that you are looking a little confused,‟ said Abraham.
„Let me explain,‟ he continued. I nodded my head in agreement.
„You see that according to the Bible there is going to be final day of
judgement. There is also a judgement day in Hinduism, of sorts described
in the Srimad Bhagavatam, 12th canto, chapter 2, verse 20, an easy to
remember reference, I have also written that down, it says:
‗ Lord Kalki, the Lord of the universe will mount His swift horse Devadatta and,
sword in hand, travels over the earth exhibiting His eight mystic opulences and
408
 THE TWO KEYS

eight special qualities of Godhead. Displaying His unequalled effulgence and riding
with great speed, He will kill by the millions those thieves who have dared dress as
kings.‘
Muslims also believe that there will be a day of judgement, and that
Allah will judge your good deeds and bad deeds, in Surah 1 verse 4 Allah
is the Master of the day of judgement and in Surah 2 verse 281 it says to
fear the day when you shall be brought back to Allah, then every soul will
be judged justly.
The judgement day in the Bible is described slightly differently,
everyone will be judged at the same time. At the time of judgement
someone, God, sitting on the big white throne will decide who will live in
Heaven and who will be thrown into the lake of fire. The chapter at the
end tells us that it is Jesus who is sitting on that throne, so it is Jesus who
is going to be the judge. So it is totally true that to get to Heaven we have
to get past the judgement of Jesus. It also tells us on what basis we will be
judged. It says that the books will be opened and we will be judged on
what we have done and if our name is in the book of life then we will be
spared being thrown into the lake of fire. It is based on what we have
done; our deeds include our actions, our thoughts and our words.
So clearly Elijah, Moses, Enoch and Abraham in the example I gave
earlier will have their names written in the book of life even though they
never knew Jesus. So you could conclude that your grandfather may have
his name in the book of life, even though he did not know Jesus.‟
„How come you know so much?‟ I asked Abraham.
„I simply make it a point to study everything that people tell me and
check for myself whether they have understood and interpreted it
correctly.‟
„Okay that makes sense. But if this is the case then what difference does
it make whether or not I believe in Jesus, if I am going to be judged on
what I have done,‟ I asked Abraham.
„Well I am sure that both Roshan and Samson would say that it makes a
big difference. But before we discuss that I would like to make another
point. The point is that you have changed the parameters of your
question and issue. Your first problem was about your grandfather not
having heard about Jesus. But once you have heard about Jesus you are in
a slightly different ball game. I am assuming that you believe what is
written in the Bible. If you have heard about Jesus, and let us assume that
the Bible is correct, then on the day of judgement he is going to ask why
after hearing about him, why did you not believe? He won‟t ask this
question to your grandfather or anyone else for the matter who has not
heard about Jesus, he may ask various questions about the extent to
which they made an effort to find out about God or something else.‟
„I can see that what you are saying seems logically plausible, but you are
guessing.‟
409
 SECOND CHANCE

„Yes I am guessing, but it is a reasonable guess, would you not agree?‟

Abraham was getting serious in his tone.
„Yes I would agree. Please do go on,‟ I replied.
„Besides if you read the Bible carefully you will find many instances of
people who are not Jewish nor Christian believing in a God, not
necessarily knowing that it is the same God as that worship by the Jews
or Christians but still being found by God. In fact the prophet Isaiah who
lived around 700BC wrote in Isaiah 65 verse 1:
‗I [the Lord God], revealed myself to those who did not ask for me; I was found by
those who did not seek me. To a nation that did not call on my name, I said,
‗Here am I, here am I.‘
„Don‟t you think that it is curious Arjuna that the Upanishads were
written in India around the same time. We all see that there is a Roman
centurion in the book of Mathew that has faith in Jesus. I think it is
chapter 8. Yes here it is‟, Abraham was flicking very quickly through his
Bible and was giving me a lot of references as had Samson and Roshan.
„Yes here it is this is what Jesus says about the Roman centurion, who
would have been expected to have worship Roman Gods; yet Jesus says:
‗I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith. I say
to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at
the feast with Abraham, Issac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven.‘
In the book of Acts, we are told in chapter 10 that:
‗At Caesarea there was a man named Cornelius, a centurion in what was known
as the Italian Regiment. He and all his family were devout and God fearing; he
gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly.‘
We later read that God spoke to him in a dream to find Peter and Peter
told him about Jesus. Paul says in the book of Romans that God is the
God of the Jews as well as the Gentiles, since there is only one God and
that he will justify the circumcised by faith, meaning the Jews, and the
uncircumcised, the non-Jews, by the same faith.
You see my dear Arjuna if there is a supreme Creator God out there
then he is the God of everyone. My assumption is that he is a fair and just
God, so he will make himself known to anyone and everyone who is
looking for him. Followers of Islam believe that everyone is a Muslim it‟s
just that they don‟t realise it. Hindus believe that all paths lead to God,
the same God, you can call him what you like, therefore everyone is a
Hindu but they don‟t realise it. Finally the God in the Bible is the God of
everyone.‟
„Are you saying that the God of the Bible, the God of the Qur‟an, and
the God of the Bhagavad Gita is the same God; and that all of the
religions are the same,‟ I asked as I was getting confused. I had thought
410
 THE TWO KEYS

that these belief systems were different, and now Abraham was stressing
the similarities.
„Whether they are the same or not is up to you to decide. Many people
have nicknames, so a single person may be known by many names.
However, everyone that knows that person will describe the personality
of that individual in exactly the same way, irrespective of what name they
know him by. The key question that you need to evaluate for yourself is
whether the character of Jesus, Allah, Rama, Siva and Krishna as
described in their respective holy books are the same or different. If they
have exactly the same character then it is likely to be a name change but
the same God. However, if you conclude that they have different
characteristics, personalities and behaviours then they are not the same
God. A potential short cut to this extensive process is to simply pray and
ask. All the Gods have a desire to be known. You may have Allah, or
Buddha, or Jesus, or Krishna or something else come to you to reveal
themselves to you. All that I am saying is that someone who is sincerely
looking will ultimately be connected to the truth, and it will probably be
from some kind of revelation very specific to that individual. It will be a
revelation which cannot be explained logically nor have the same impact
on someone else. Only a supernatural revelation will give you the level of
experiential proof that you require to know what is true and what is not.
If you are going to put your faith in something, which may result in a
radical change in your life, then surely you need to be sure that whatever
you have your faith in is really true. That is why it is critical that you
receive a supernatural revelation as to what you believe in. It is not a
coincidence that all of those with great faith have had some form of
spiritual encounter.‟
I remembered all the books that I read about the various people Smith
Wigglesworth, Brother Yun, Paul Yongi Cho, Jackie Pullinger, Mahesh
Chavda and others. They had all had some kind of supernatural
encounter.
„But is there really something different about the Christian belief
system, and is it not absurd, to expect a supernatural revelation?‟ I asked.
„It is difficult to distinguish the practice from what is in the scripture.
All scripture is not the same. The Holy Qur‟an, the Holy Bible, the
Dhamapada, the Bhagvad Gita and the Upanishads all have very different
teachings, which you found out when you heard Ravi Zacharias at
Hyderabad. However, we are all the same. Whether you are rich or poor,
educated or uneducated, Asian or European, healthy or sick, we tend to
be motivated by the same things. So what tends to happen is that we all
tend to do what we want to do, adjusting and distorting whatever
happens to be the scripture in front of us to suit our needs. Thus you will
find that Hindu‟s practicing karma theory and going to see a Brahmin to
do a puja, is no different from a Roman Catholic completely focussed on
411
 SECOND CHANCE

good works (and not on God) who goes to his Padre for confession.
They may be dressed differently, and go to different buildings but the
actions are exactly the same.‟
„So are you saying that ultimately it all boils down to the same thing and
that in practice all religions are the same?‟
„I am saying that the scriptures are different, that you need to
distinguish between scripture and practice; because often practice in
which ever religion is incredibly variable and often be far removed from
practice. A Christian Pentecostal practices very differently from a Roman
Catholic yet they have the same Bible. The practices of a Shia Muslim
Ishmali are quite different from a Sunni Muslim yet they have the same
Holy Qur‟an. This is why there has been so much conflict between
Protestants and Roman Catholics (although both are Christian and
believe in the Bible) and between Shias and Sunnis (yet they are both
Muslim and believe in the Holy Qur‟an). The practices of someone doing
Kriya Yoga, or Transcendental Meditation are quite different from a
follower of Lord Krishna or Sai Baba yet they all claim to be founded on
the Vedas and the Bhagavad Gita.
But there is a difference. That is why I say to you that these things are
not only a matter of reasoning and logic, ultimately the most convincing
argument is a personal spiritual experience. If you have had one of those,
then you will need no further proofs.‟
„A supernatural experience?‟
„This is where there are experiential differences between different belief
systems. The bible says that if the Holy Spirit is in you it helps you and
guides you, from which one could infer that it increases the likelihood of
your name being in book of life. This Holy Spirit concept as a guiding
force to help you get to God, is something that is unique to Christianity.
Christians believe that the Holy Spirit is the Spirit of God that is a gift of
God available to all those who have repented and been baptised by the
Holy Spirit which then dwells inside of you. In Judaism they mention the
Holy Spirit but it is a special anointing that comes on a few select, it is at
the sole and sovereign discretion of God. In Islam, they say that the Holy
Spirit is actually the prophet Mohammed and that it is a person, and that
it is neither a spirit nor does it dwell in people. So if you are a born again
Spirit filled Christian you will have the feeling of assurance that your
name is in the book of life and that you will end up in Heaven. This is
quite a big difference between Christianity, Judaism and Islam.
Some Christians believe that you no longer have to rely on your own
strength, you just allow the Holy Spirit to work in you. That only with the
help and guidance of the Holy Spirit will you be able to follow the
teachings of Jesus.‟
„This Holy Spirit thing would be a big difference, if I believed what you
said and believed what it says in the Bible.‟
412
 THE TWO KEYS

„Yes. But don‟t take my word for it. If you really believe in the Bible
then repentance is the most important,‟ continued Abraham.
„Why do you say that?‟ I asked.
„It is the first thing that Jesus preached. It is also a common message
right throughout the Bible. Turning to God and truly surrendering to him
is not as easy as it sounds, relying on him and not on your own efforts.
It‟s about being ego less and obeying all of God‟s commands.‟
„But isn‟t being egoless the whole point about Buddhism, all the
meditation techniques such as Reiki and Transcendental Meditation, and
all forms of yoga. And isn‟t Islam all about submission to God‟s laws.‟
„Yes you are right. But as you know when you did the meditation and
the yoga, the pride in you increased as your ability to master spiritual
energy developed. This is bound to happen because all of these
techniques including following the Buddhist middle path rely on your
own efforts to master that particular way. As you master these techniques
there is a risk that your ego will be inflated. It is impossible not to end up
believing that you are better, after all you are „enlightened‟, you will get
better at masking your ego, but your ego is still there probably even
stronger than before. Was that not your experience?‟ asked Abraham.
„Yes it was. But I was told that the more I would do it, the better my
mastery then I would pass through that phase,‟ I replied.
„Your answer has vindicated my argument. You said that the more „I‟ do
it, „my‟ mastery, all of these thoughts and actions will simply inflate your
ego albeit a different more subtle part of your ego. It is only in
Christianity that the ego really diminishes as you surrender and realise the
purity and power of the Holy Spirit, and begin to see your true selfish
nature.‟
„I am not sure that I agree with you on this. Anyway you made a point
about obeying all of God‟s commands; isn‟t that what Islam is about the
five pillars of Islam?‟
„Yes it is. But if you are simply following God‟s commands you are at
the risk of becoming self-righteous?‟
„What do you mean self righteous?‟
„Self righteousness is a form of pride and a form of ego which is very
difficult to detect and is something that the God of the Bible does not
like. Let me try and explain. If you were to follow all of God‟s
commandments in the Bible or Allah‟s commandments in the Holy
Qur‟an using your own strength and understanding then there is a danger
that your ego will start getting puffed up. You might start thinking about
how, through your own efforts, you are such a good Jew following the
commandments, or such a good Christian following Jesus and such a
good Muslim following the Qur‟an. There is a danger that you will start
to think highly of yourself. You are in real danger of puffing up your ego
in the same way that your ego may be puffed up from being a master at
413
 SECOND CHANCE

meditation or a guru in yoga. Don‟t misunderstand me I am not saying

that all Muslims, Jews, Christians are self righteous nor am I saying that
all gurus and practioners of meditation have puffed up egos – but I am
saying that the danger of that occurring is very high.‟
„This is all very interesting but surely all of this is simply your opinion.
Where does it say all of this?‟ I asked Abraham.
„I am glad that you have been listening to what I have been telling you. I
can tell you and we can go through it together where the God of the bible
abhors self righteousness. In the Holy Qur‟an in Surah number 3 verse
92, if I remember correctly, it says ‗ You cannot attain righteousness unless you
freely give that which you love‘, and elsewhere I think it is Surah 2 verse 177 it
says ‗to spend out of your substance out of love of Allah‘.
In the Hindu scriptures, in the Bhagavad Gita, again if my memory
serves me correctly, in chapter 16 on the nature of divine and demoniac
personalities, Lord Krishna describes the demonic characteristics in verse
6 says ‗Pride, arrogance, conceit, anger, harshness and ignorance are qualities that
belong to the demonic nature.‘ It does not mention self-righteousness
explicitly, however, self –righteousness is a form of pride, would you not
agree?‟ You will have to decide for yourself about whether my arguments
about Buddhism, meditation and yoga are valid.‟
„Okay, show me about the God in the Bible and this thing about self
righteousness,‟ I asked.
„Before we start, would you like to have another cup of tea?‟ asked
Abraham.
The conversation had gone a lot longer than I had imagined it would.
„Yes that is a great idea. I hope I am not taking up too much of your
time.‟
„It is taking time, but this is a subject that I am passionate about,‟
replied Abraham, who ordered more tea and somosas.
„Let us continue,‟ resumed Abraham, „there many references to this
topic of self righteousness in the bible. Here it is in Luke, chapter 18,‟
Abraham then read out:
And Jesus also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves that they
were righteous, and viewed others with contempt: ―Two men went up into the
temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. ―The Pharisee stood
and was praying this to himself: ‗God, I thank you that I am not like other
people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. ‗I fast twice a
week; I pay tithes of all that I get.‘ But the tax collector, standing some distance
away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast,
saying, ‗God, be merciful to me, the sinner!‘ I tell you, this man went to his house
justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalt himself will be humbled, but
he who humbles himself will be exalted.‖

414
 THE TWO KEYS

You will see in this passage that Jesus has the same issue as you Arjuna,
regarding „Churchianity‟. In his time the Pharisee was a priest in the local
synagogue. The Pharisee represents religious leaders, or very religious
people. Unfortunately, religious people do tend to have a „holier than
thou‟ kind of attitude. The same attitude that you don‟t like is also the
attitude that Jesus did not like. This should give you an answer to your
issue about going to Church and being a follower of Christ.
I believe that you have to humble yourself before the Creator God,
surrender totally to him and have humility in your attitude towards
others. If you believe that the Bible is correct then you have a model of
God coming down to earth as Jesus, humbling himself as poor carpenter
in a small much despised town called Nazareth, who served others,
washed the feet of his disciples and allowed himself to be crucified and
rose himself up on the third day. But you need to decide whether the
Creator God is Jesus, or Allah or Krishna or someone else and whether
he really is there.
I would also like to stress is that if as a Christian you do not really
believe or practice repentance, or believe in a super natural life changing
Holy Spirit of God in dwelling in you; then your beliefs are very similar to
that of Jews and Muslims. In that case, because of the way that you are
practicing your faith, then you may be justified in saying that Jehovah,
Allah and Jesus are the same as are the religions.‟
„Is that what you believe?‟ I asked.
„No I do not believe that the scriptures are the same. However I do
observe that the way certain sects within Christianity, Judaism, Islam,
Hinduism and Buddhism practice their beliefs, there is virtually no
discernable difference. Now you, Arjuna, have to decide whether or not,
in practical terms all religions are the same, or that they are different if
you decide to follow them to the letter. If you decide that they are
different; then you will have to decide which one of them is the truth, if
any.‟
„Okay I am beginning to understand. My confusion has always been in
distinguishing between practice, and theory. I am getting confused by
looking at the people rather than the scripture. They are inextricably
linked. However, you are telling me that I need to distinguish between the
two.‟
„Yes that is correct. You will not be able to logically conclude which is
correct. Ultimately, you will have to go on faith. Practice is critically
important. I want to highlight to you the problems of all the religious
belief systems if you follow them, and have not truly repented and
humbled yourself to whoever you think the Creator God may be.
You can call yourself a born again spirit filled Christian, but have you
really humbled yourself before God and repented? You may even think
that you have the Holy Spirit, but if you have no humility nor continue to
415
 SECOND CHANCE

be humble then you will be like the Pharisee described by Jesus and may
not make the mark. As a born again Christian can you keep to all that
Jesus commanded his disciples to do in the Sermon on the Mount, in
Mathew chapters 5 to 7; not to get angry, not be judgemental, to love
your enemies, have no lustful thoughts? It is not easy being a Spirit filled
born again Christian.
You can be a Buddhist, but if you have no humility, you are not going
to get to Nirvana. Can you as a Buddhist really follow the Middle Path,
right action, right thought, right understanding and the other attributes of
the Middle Path? As a Buddhist isn‟t there a real danger that you will have
an air of superior thinking that you are on the right path, whereas others
are still stuck on a carnal material existence? Is it not inevitable that you
will have such thoughts? It is not easy being a Buddhist.
As a Muslim you can do all the good works you can, but Allah will
ultimately judge as to whether, you freely gave and worked with the love
of Allah in you at all times. If you didn‟t, then those acts of righteousness
do not count according to the Holy Qur‟an. Can any man be sure; that
they have done enough good works with this attitude, and that they are
sufficient to outweigh all those actions that have been wrong? Not so
easy, is it, being a Muslim?
Can you be sure as a Hindu that your karmic balance is more positive
than when you started life, considering all the things that you have done
and things that you have thought about? In the Bhagavad Gita, chapter
16 verse 21, it says that ‗There are three gates to this hell- lust, anger and greed.
Every sane man should give these up, for they lead to the degradation of the soul.‘
Notice, Arjuna, the Gita says that every angry thought, every fit of rage,
every jealous act, every envious look, or lustful thought all work towards
keeping you back from finishing the cycle of death and birth. Can you
then be sure, as a Hindu, that you are ever going to break away from this
cycle? What is worse it says that you can slip into a demonic existence
and the previous verse says ‗Attaining repeated birth amongst the species of
demoniac life, O son of Kunti, such persons can never approach Me. Gradually they
sink down to the most abominable type of existence.‘ Can any man or woman say
that they have never been angry or greedy or had a lustful thought? If you
were then to believe the Gita then you would be destined to a demoniac
existence in Hell. Not so clear cut or easy that you will ultimately break
out of the cycle of birth and re-birth, the chances of ending up as a
demonnic seem a lot greater. Karma or bhakti yoga is not easy my dear
Arjuna.
If you are meditating for higher things can you truly destroy your own
ego through the very process that you are using, can you accurately
discern what is in your heart?
Finally, if you are an atheist, how sure are you that there really is no
God? How sure are you that random processes can create something as
416
 THE TWO KEYS

complex as DNA? How sure can you be that all of the physical constants
happen to, randomly, be within such a high level of precision? How
confident can you be about evolution, despite the fact that there are no
transitory fossils? Can you be sure that intelligence evolves, despite the
fact that languages, such as ancient Greek are significantly more complex
than modern languages? Are you going to put your faith in what scientists
tell you, in spite of the fact that they keep on changing their theories, and
cannot agree with each other? As an atheist are you really okay with
everyone „dancing to their own DNA‟?
Taking the atheistic viewpoint assumes that you are sure beyond any
doubt that there is no God. Does any man have that level of
understanding of all science, human nature and history to rule out any
possibility? Can anyone have really considered every single argument and
examined every reported miracle, to know for sure that God does not
exist?‟ Abraham paused.
„It sounds as if you can‟t be sure of anything and every path has its own
difficulties,‟ I replied, a bit taken back by such a passionate outpouring.
„That is why ultimately you need to pray and be very sure of what you
believe in, and desire a supernatural experience which would be
conclusive proof that what you believe in is true. Be very sure that
whatever you believe, you really believe it. This is a very important issue,
and understand whatever you choose fully be it the Torah, the Qur‟an,
the Gita, the Bible, the Dhamapada. Do not take the word of someone
else examine and study it.‟
I didn‟t reply.
Abraham broke the silence: „You can rely on logic and understanding,
or you can pray as I suggested. Ultimately it is not logic but a revelation
from the Creator God that will give you an answer. I am sorry but I have
to ask you leave now, it is getting quite late.‟
„But the prayer didn‟t work,‟ I replied.
„The prayer always works. However, it is like a locked door with two
locks.‟
„Two locks?‟ I asked.
„Yes, two locks. Every lock needs a key. We have spent most of today
on one of the keys and yesterday we talked about the other one. Do you
know what I am talking about?‟Asked Abraham.
I wondered what to say. We had discussed so many things. Abraham
looked at his watch.
„Yesterday we talked about having a strong belief, and today we‟ve
talked about a lot of things but mostly about surrender, submission,
repentance, humility.‟
„Yes that is right Arjuna. The two keys to unlocking the prayer are
belief, some would say faith, that you will receive an answer. The second
is surrender/submission, some would say repentance that you really want
417
 SECOND CHANCE

to know who is the creator, and are willing to change in the light of that
information. If you neither believe nor are willing to surrender then there
is no point in the Creator God wasting his time with you.‟
„Why would he not respond, and why do you say that it would be a
waste of the Creator‟s time?‟ I asked.
„I said that it would be a waste of the Creator God‟s time, because of
two reasons. First if you don‟t really believe that you will get an answer,
then when you do get an answer you will dismiss it as your own
imagination and not as something real from the Creator God. The second
is that once the Creator God has revealed to you who or what he is, then
he would expect that you would act on that information and do exactly as
he commands you. If you are unwilling to change, then what is the point
of his revealing himself to you?‟
„I understand what you are saying. I am ready to surrender, but I wasn‟t
sure that the prayer would work. My belief or level of faith was not very
high.‟
„That is exactly why the prayer did not work. Now I really have to go.
We can talk tomorrow if you want,‟ with that Abraham stood up and
shook my hand.
I said good bye and left for home and went to the bedroom. I got down
on my knees ready to surrender to the Creator God, believing that I
would get an answer this time. I said, „I pray to the Creator God whoever
you may be. I am ready to submit myself to you. I am ready to surrender
my will to you. Please reveal yourself to me. I want to know the truth and
I want to know how you would like me to live and the purpose that you
have for me. I am really ready to believe in you, whoever you may be!‟
Nothing happened. I stayed on my knees and asked with my heart for
an answer. A few moments later, I saw a bright light before me and heard
a voice. The Creator revealed to me who he was. He had given me a
second chance.
I then understood why Abraham had not told me what he had received.
It could have influenced what I saw, and even if it had not, I may have
doubted that what I saw was real. I may have simply dismissed it as a
trick of the mind. I could have reasoned that I simple saw and heard what
I wanted to see and hear, and concluded that there was nothing real
about it.
I wanted to go and find Abraham straightaway, and check with him
whether what I had received was the same message that he had got. Then
I remembered that he was on his way out. I would have to wait. The next
day I got up early and went to see Abraham to tell him what I had
experienced. I knocked on the apartment door.
A little girl opened the door. I had never seen her before. I asked
whether Abraham was in. She looked at me quizzically and then she shut
the door and I could hear her shouting „Papa.‟ I just stood there
418
 THE TWO KEYS

wondering what was happening. The door opened and a man in his
thirties opened the door and said:
„Yes can I help you?‟
„Yes my name is Arjuna and I live in the apartment across the road at
399. Can I speak to Abraham please?‟
„Abraham?‟
„Yes Abraham.‟
„There is no Abraham here. You must have got the wrong place.‟
„I was here just this afternoon and I have been meeting with him for the
last month or so.‟
„No, no. We have been here for the last 5 years, there is no Abraham
here. Maybe he lives on the floor above or in another apartment and you
have just made a mistake – you know all the doors look the same.
Perhaps it‟s one of our neighbours. What does this Abraham look like?‟
Maybe Abraham was pulling a fast one on me and was really hiding
inside. I wanted to see inside the apartment perhaps he was just there
behind the door.
„Yes that‟s a good idea,‟ I was trying to think of what to say so that I
could get into the door. Just then the man said.
„Why don‟t you come in and tell me rather than standing at our door.‟
I thanked him and went inside.
The bookshelf was gone, so were the chairs, the walls were in a drab
beige the paint was peeling, the floor was a completely different colour
with yellow tiles. This was not Abraham‟s apartment. It was not the same
one that I had been in that afternoon or all the other times. Maybe I had
made a mistake and it was on another floor. But I had been here so many
times. I described Abraham to the man.
„I am sorry but I have never seen a man like that here in this block,‟ he
went on to describe all the people living in the block. None of them
sounded as if they could possibly be Abraham. I thanked him and left
thinking that I was losing the plot.
I never saw Abraham again. I don‟t know whether it was imagined or
not imagined. A few weeks later there was a knock at the door.
Ganshyam answered the door as he normally did and came back with two
leather bound books that were tied together with a piece of string.
„Sir this was at the door. There was nobody there.‟
„Thanks,‟ I took the books out of his hand and saw that there was a
note on the top.
„Sorry I had to leave. I am sure that the Creator would have given you
your answer. I thought that you may like to have these two books, to
remind you of our last conversation and another book that will really get
you thinking. Your friend, Abraham.‟
I rushed out to the window to see if there was anybody unusual about.
Someone must have delivered the books and they would be there – they
419
 SECOND CHANCE

could lead me to Abraham. Predictably there was nobody there. I know

that it sounds like a real cliché, but this is the way that it happened. I cut
open the string. One of the books was the Book of Questions by
Haazaya and the second was an even older book the title was „The
Chronicles of Peleg‟.
Even as I write these words to you I have the two books next to the
computer. Abraham has completely disappeared. I don‟t know where he
is.
I am not going to tell you what happened when I said the prayer. I am
going to do an „Abraham‟ on you, but I am not going to disappear. I can
tell you that the revelation that I received was the last piece of the jigsaw
that I needed to make sense of everything that I have ever experienced. It
changed my world-view, which is now not only coherent but also
corresponds with everything that I know. It explains all my experiences,
explaining the Holy Spirit, Reiki, Shaktipat, Vippasana, Kriya Yoga,
Astrology, Transcendental Meditation, Hinduism, Islam, Buddhism,
Christianity, the Vedas, Upanishads, Bhagavad Gita, Ramayana,
Dhamapada, Holy Qur‟an, and the Holy Bible. I now know what the
truth is, and what is incoherent falsity. I have found a super Guru who is
now inside of me that keeps me in truth. I have also realised, that
although what I believe does meet all the three tests of logical
consistency, empirical adequacy, and experiential relevance; nevertheless,
if I had not received a supernatural revelation directly from the Creator
God, I would not have sufficient faith to believe in what I believe. Logic
and revelation are equally important for true unshakable faith.
I don‟t know whether you will say the prayer and take your second
chance, don‟t forget the two keys of surrender and belief. It is your
personal choice. I will be your friend always.
Finally, the other book Abraham gave me is absolutely mind blowing.
Can‟t go into it in any detail but it‟s the diary of a guy called Peleg living
near Babylon, which I think is close to present day Baghdad, around
about 2400 BC. He is writing about some amazing things happening – I
can‟t work out whether it‟s true or complete fiction. If I get the time I‟ll
write to you about it.
Hope you got something out of Second Chance. Let me know if you
did.

Arjuna

arjuna@secondchancethebook.com
www.secondchancethebook.com
P.S Did you notice that the last page in this book is 10 x 42? (The
answer to the Universe and everything – Hitch Hiker‟s Guide to the
Galaxy!) Is that just a coincidence or ....?
420