Forgiveness was the first word that came across my mind before I made an

offering at the prayer altar. It might not be easy to forgive in the natural sense, but
with the help of the Holy Spirit, nothing is impossible. If someone disagrees with
me, hurts my feelings, or makes me feel bad through negative words or actions, I
become enraged and refuse to speak with or be near that person for many years.
Today, with the presence of the Holy Spirit, I can forgive them from the heart and
sometimes pray and fast for them. I don’t know whether they forgive me in their
hearts, but whenever I remember them, I will pray for them. It is written in
Colossians 3:12-14, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved,
clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and
patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you have a
grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these
virtues, put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
proud; It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it
keeps no record of wrongs.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-5. This verse taught me to
forgive them from the heart, love them, forget what is past and look forward
to what is ahead. As a child of God, I will continue praying for them and
sharing the true Gospel of Christ with them. Whenever I share the verses of
God with anyone, I feel so much peace inside of me, and I like what I’m doing.
Hallelujah!!!
Here, I would like to share one of my little testimonies regarding
forgiveness. For many years, I lived as a Christian according to my will and
not according to God. I was living a sinful life. I don’t read the bible and I
don’t know how to ask help from the Holy Spirit, especially related to
discerning. As a result, at twenty-four, I was living as a defeated Christian
because I had given way to the enemy’s oppression of me. The enemy
operated through the sins that I had committed. I thank God for sending His
servant to delivering me from the spiritual attack. By the time the man of God
said the prayer of deliverance over me, in the spirit realms, I saw the angry
face of our Lord Jesus Christ surrounded by the blazing fire coming towards
me. The sadly part is, I didn’t even know that was the spirit realm because
I’m not a good Bible reader.

The closer the Lord Jesus came to me, the brighter the fire was. I thought the fire
of the Lord would burn me, and I was shouting. When I opened my eyes, I was still
lying on the floor, but my hands and feet were as if I had been crucified on the
cross. At that moment, I indeed found relief from spiritual attack. I was surprised
to learn the word of God, especially the verses in Hebrews 12:29, which says, “For
Our God is consuming fire.” There was one time I saw in the spiritual realms, the
sky was opened, I saw Jesus in the middle surrounding by so many angels. Seems
like the whole kingdom of heaven is looking at me. And He made all my enemies
tremble with fear. I arise as a witness that the Lord Jesus is a true living God who
came in the flesh to save humankind. Today, I can say confidently that our Lord
Jesus is my Lord and my personal Savior. Thank you, Lord, for releasing Your fire
and burning up the work of darkness in my life. I thank you, Lord, for casting out
all my enemies with your fire. Let your fire protect me and cover me (Exod.
14:24). Let Your light be for a fire, and Your Holy One for a flame to burn the
briers and thorns in my life (Isa.10:17). I thank you, Lord Jesus; I praise you, Lord
Jesus. I thank you, Lord, for saving my soul. All glory to God the Father, the Son
and Holy Spirit!!!

After this incident, I can’t concentrate on my studies. I was a first-year student

working on my bachelor’s degree in law that time. I can’t think like usual
anymore, and even if I do so, my mind goes blank; I will get a terrible headache,
migraine, and sometimes faint. The impact of this was that I failed my entire
exam. I still remember how my heart was crying when I got the results; I strolled to
the waterfront nearby, sat down at one bench early in the morning, looked up at the
sky and the river in front of me, and kept on reasoning in my heart. So many
questions came into my mind at that hour: Why did I become a failure in life? Why
did this bad luck happen to me? Why can I not be myself as before? Why can I not
study like before? Why can I not think and memories what I have learned? I have
come to the wrong conclusion; maybe God was the one who put me to the test
because of my sins. That was how I felt due to a lack of knowledge about God. My
heart keeps on crying for all the things that have happened. I became so frustrated
in life. It seemed there was no hope for me anymore. I can’t see my future. I was
giving up on serving the true God, wandered and get lost. I did not know that all
those voices were the voices of evil that try to seduce and pull me down and lose
faith in God. I should not have entertained them at all.
After sometime, I never thought “A Good Shepherd” would come and look for me.
There was a time when I was sleeping and a bright light came towards me from the
sky. As it got closer, I realized it was like the Star of Bethlehem. It came straight to
my forehead, and I woke up. I was speaking in tongues in an unknown language.
The first words that came from my mouth were, “Praise the Lord.” Ahh! I was so
angry with myself. I felt weird. Why was I the only one who had to face all these
supernatural things? I rush to the kitchen and saw my father liquor. I drink a half
bottle of it and challenge the spirit. “What can you do now? I lost my sober right.
What can you do to me now? Come on, answer me!” Then I hear my inner voice
say, “I’ll give you some time.” I talked with my inner voice. What! You want to
give me some time for what? I was too tired to think about all this. I was still
recovering from my traumatic experiences, and now everything has turned upside-
down again. A few days pass; I heard the same voice again telling me, “Come back
to me, Matthew.” I was having a conversation with someone who speaks to my
heart, and yet I don’t know to whom I am talking. However, I am replying to the
voice, “Give me some time, Lord,” and the answer that I get is, “I give you some
time.” I called the voice, “Lord.”
You know what? I tried to ignore the voice and mind my own business. The Lord
still did not give up on me, and He gave me a dream. In that dream, I entered a
church, and I saw someone familiar with me preaching to the audience at the altar.
A great sadness overflowed into my heart. He is our Lord Jesus Christ. At that
moment, I felt so unworthy to serve Him. What more to say, to see Him face-to-
face? In that dream, I felt it would be better for me to vanish from the Lord Jesus’
sight before He saw me. I felt guilty, ashamed, and discouraged about seeing
myself because I let Him down.
My heart kept on crying, but then I braved my heart, stepped back, and tried to
leave that place as soon as possible. As I came out of the church, someone grabbed
my arm, and when I turned around, I saw Lord Jesus. He hugged me and
whispered in my right ear, “Matthew, all your sins. I forgive.” In a second, my
heart turns to joy. I felt so relieved. The heavy burden in my heart gone forever.
Lord Jesus said almost similar words to the woman in Luke 7:48: “Your sins are
forgiven.” This is the God that we Christians worship. I came back to the Christian
faith because of Lord Jesus Christ and not men. I cannot resist the love that He has
for me. I once lost, but now I am found just as written in Luke 15:3-7. Truly, Lord
Jesus is a Good Shepherd. He came and looks for me when I lost on my way and
bring me back to the faith. All glory to God!! Time passed by. With the help of the
Holy Spirit, I learned to forgive myself, and it gives me the strength to move
forward in life again. Hallelujah!!! All praise to the Lord!!! I felt like a sheep that
been carried by Jesus on His shoulder and bring me back home.
Lord Jesus told a story about a “prodigal son” (Luke 15:20-21) “where the father
of the prodigal son saw him from a distance on his way to return home. Instead of
hatred or anger at seeing his son, the father was moved by pity. He ran to the boy,
grasped him in his arms, and kissed him tenderly. The boy did not yet admit how
much he felt sorry for his disobedience to his father, but the father had already
accepted him.
My dear brother and sister in Christ, the same thing happened in my dream
when the Lord Jesus followed me from the back, grasped my arm, and before I said
a word to Him, He hugged me and forgave all my sins. Where can I look for a
gracious God like him? Every time I remember what he has done for me, my tears
fall and my love for Him deepen. Once I accepted him as my Lord and Savior, all
my strength came back to me.
 A great peace would come to my heart when I confessed my sins to God,
and I knew deep inside of my heart that God had forgiven my sins. Sometimes, I
heard the small voice telling me, “All your sins have been forgiven, Matthew.” I
became more confident when I read the verse in John 8:36, which says, “If the Son
therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.” The verses in 1 John 1:9
gave me a lot of assurance as well, which says, “If we confess our sins, he is
faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
I also could not deny that sometimes my memories kept haunting my mind, but
thanks to the Holy Spirit for always reminding me of the word of God that I have
been forgiven through the blood of Jesus. (Hebrew 9:22). It gives me hope to live a
holy life. I learned to forget what is past and look forward to what is ahead, as it is
written in Philippians 3:13. The words in Hebrews 10:17 always give me a great
victory to overcome the evil manipulation in my mind, which is written, “And their
sins and iniquities will I remember no more.” Hallelujah!!!
This is how I used to counter-attack the battlefield in my mind. I encourage
everyone to seek God through His words, to put them into practice in their daily
lives, and to ask the Holy Spirit to lead them. I thank you, God, for translating us
from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of God’s dear Son. (Colossians
1:13-14). Thank you, Abba Father. Thank you, Lord Jesus. Thank you, Holy Spirit.
GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!!